#((Muse; Elena))

[metamorphesque]

musings on writing

Heaven Is Not Verbose: A Notebook by Vera Pavlova (tr. Steven Seymour), Letters Home by Sylvia Plath, MaddAddam by Margaret Atwood, A Breath of Life by Clarice Lispector, Isak Dinesen quoted by Raymond Carver, The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath by Sylvia Plath, from a letter to Max Brod by Franz Kafka, Conversations with Kafka by Gustav Janouch, The Story of the Lost Child by Elena Ferrante, The Diary of Anaïs Nin, Vol. 1: 1931-1934

[toomuchracket]

bump in the night (dad!matty x reader fluff)

baby phoebe thinks there's a monster under her bed. matty to the rescue! once again, promptober. enjoy <3

“dad… dad, wake up.”

the owner of the worried voice shoves his shoulder, and matty jerks awake. disoriented, he fumbles for the switch on the bedside lamp; when he finds it, he also finds dylan standing beside him, eyes wide and teeth chewing at her bottom lip. “dyl?” he clears his throat, voice scratchy. “what is it, darling?”

“it's phoebe. she won't stop crying,” her jaw is trembling, a clear sign that she's anxious. matty reaches for her hand, and she seems to calm down slightly. “me and elena both tried to calm her down, but she just keeps sobbing for you and mum. don't know what else to do, dad.”

terror pierces him, the kind of fear that only sets in when you or your daughters are concerned - the worst kind, it goes without saying. extracting his right arm from your still-sleeping hold as inconspicuously as possible, matty pulls himself out of bed, reassuring his eldest before he goes to help his youngest. “you did the right thing, dyl,” he pulls her into a hug, kissing her sleep-messy curls. “is pheebs saying she's not feeling well, or…?”

“no, she just keeps crying and saying she wants you and mum. she calmed down a little bit when lena and i went in, but not a lot.”

“okay,” he rubs his eyes, taking dylan's hand. “lead the way.”

it's only a few steps across the landing and down the hall to phoebe's room, but the worry makes it seem far longer. a wave of relief washes over matty when he and dylan make it through the door, but it's short-lived - his three-year-old is shaking in her big sister’s arms, the flush on her tear-stained cheeks evident in the glow from the nightlight, and elena looks on the verge of tears too. “oh, my darlings,” he coos softly, kneeling at the side of phoebe's bed. “what's wrong?”

phoebe practically throws herself into his arms, tiny body wrapping itself around his. hot tears dampen his t-shirt, and matty can feel his own eyes welling up. he's sick to his stomach when any of his girls are upset, but his youngest is so especially sweet and smiley that her sadness seems to hurt him just that little bit more. “phoebe, sweetheart,” he murmurs. “please tell daddy why you're crying, yeah? deep breaths, munchkin, copy me,” he inhales deeply, and exhales slowly. “can you do that?”

she copies him shakily, while elena crawls to sit on the edge of the bed in front of him; even at seven, her legs still don't reach the ground, dangling endearingly instead. “i think she's scared, dad.”

“alright, darling, thank you,” he smiles at his middle baby, who returns it sleepily. “you two can go back to bed, if you like. thank you for helping your sister, my sweet girls.”

they shake their heads in vehement denial, dylan moving to join her sister on the edge of the bed. “not leaving until phoebe's okay.”

“you sure? you'll be tired tomorrow.”

elena shrugs, matty in miniature. “doesn't matter. our sister’s more important.”

matty's eyes actually do fill with tears at that - how on earth did you and him manage to create such perfect, kind humans? it's baffling. “alright, darlings,” he nods, before turning his attention to phoebe. “did you have a bad dream, sweetheart?”

tiny curls brush his neck as she shakes her head. “uh-uh.”

“okay. was there a big noise outside? foxes, or a car, or people shouting? that can be really scary, especially if it wakes you up.”

another head shake. “in here.”

now we're getting somewhere. “there was a scary noise in your bedroom, munchkin?”

“yeah,” phoebe's little voice shakes, turning to a sob when she speaks again. “like… like a monster!”

“where exactly, darling?”

“the- the wall,” she hiccups; matty softly rubs her back to calm her down. “and under my bed.”

interesting. monsters under the bed aren't exactly uncommon, but in the wall? maybe phoebe's imagination is stronger than you all thought.

or maybe… “what kind of thing did it sound like, sweetheart? can you remember?”

she thinks for a second, wiping her eyes on the shoulder of his t-shirt. “like when my tummy is hungry.”

“rumbling? why would it be… oh,” the answer clicks in matty's brain, the logistics of the house's layout revealing it to him: phoebe's bedroom is directly above the utility room, so - “it isn't a monster, my darling, it's just the central heating.”

dylan lets out a soft “ahhh” of realisation, but elena looks puzzled - when phoebe moves to look at matty, so does she. “the heating?”

“yes, munchkin. it's what makes the house cosy, and makes sure we have hot water for our showers and baths-”

“and washing our hands?”

he smiles. “exactly, my smart girl. but it all starts from that cupboard near the washing machine, and then it travels through the pipes up through your room, and into the rest of the rooms. that's what the noise is, darling. not a monster.”

phoebe sniffles. “really?”

“would you like me to check under the bed anyway?”

“mhmm.”

“alright,” he kisses her head, settling phoebe between her sisters on the bed and ducking down to scan under the bed; his back practically screams at him not to, but he can't disappoint his baby girl. “all clear down here, girls. not even a speck of dust,” popping back up, he takes phoebe's tiny hands in his own. “do you feel a bit better now, munchkin?”

“yeah,” she nods. “but the noise is scary.”

matty can't blame her for that - the bed is right against the wall with the pipework, and she's only three. it's a lot. “tell you what, darling - you come in with mummy and me, just for tonight, and tomorrow we can rearrange your room so the noise isn't as loud, yeah?”

“‘kay.”

phoebe rubs her eyes. matty smiles, scooping her into his arms again - smiling even wider at the way she melts into him - and stands, nodding at his older two. “come on, my girls. back to bed.”

the four of them trudge out onto the landing, exchanging goodnights and head kisses. matty gives dylan and elena an extra hair ruffle each. “thank you for looking after your sister, girls. lie-in tomorrow, alright?”

“mhmm. night!”

“night, dad! night, pheebs!”

two bedroom doors close, and matty carries phoebe towards the last slightly open one; behind it, you're half-asleep, but quickly awakened by the sound of matty's footsteps and, ironically, his hushed “don't wake mummy, sweetheart, alright?” to the little one in his arms. he sighs when you turn to face him, sitting up slowly and flicking the light on. “baby? what's going on?” rubbing your eyes, you notice phoebe. “oh, hi, my darling. you alright?”

“she is now,” matty sets phoebe on the bed; she crawls to you for a cuddle immediately. “but she's staying with us tonight, and i'm spending my saturday rearranging her bedroom.”

“oh, okay,” you raise a brow. “do i want to know?”

“i'll explain tomorrow,” matty flops onto the bed, flicking the light out, suddenly tired. “right now, i think we all just need to get some sleep.”

“alright,” you lean over to kiss him, dropping one onto a now-sleeping phoebe's head for good measure. “goodnight, my loves.”

matty strokes your face, and then your tiniest girl's. “goodnight, darlings.”

[literatureaesthetic]

march '24 favs:

• those who leave and those who stay & the story of the lost child ; elena ferrante — the final two books in the neapolitan novels, a tetrology recording the lives of two girls in naples from childhood to old age. gutting, beautiful, layered, and complex. this series is a masterpiece, elena ferrante is everything to me <3 (please read it!!)

• sirens and muses by antonia angress — following an array of characters at an art university as they navigate life, work, academia, relationships, and being an artist in a capitalist world where everything is commodified. the depth of characters paired with the nuanced discussions of art, class, and politics left me so pleasantly surprised. (it's also extremely gay and perfect for all you tumblr users with mummy/daddy issues)

[lilacerull0]

elena wants to feel real, but she doesn't know how to be real if she can't write a story about it. and she can't turn lila into a story. not quite. the novels as elena's love letter to lila, a way of finally giving lila her boundaries, but also the novels as lila's way of forcing elena to breathe and live and exist as elena greco, not the nameless girl sitting by the window. my brilliant friend as a pseudonym elena gives lila when she puts lila's words in her writing therefore making lila the writer too and my brilliant friend as an eponym lila gives elena to prove elena's life is worth of being written about and celebrated too.

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

Photo by Elena Kulikova

* * * *

“Repetition doesn’t really exist. As far as your mind is concerned, nothing happens the same twice, even if in every technical sense, the thing is identical. Your perception is constantly shifting. It doesn’t stay in one place.”

–Brian Eno

[Memphis Muse]

[girlief]

small   starter   call   !     hit   the   ♡ . 

[doesoft-a]

elena m gilbert + november : style

[terapsina]

weewoo 'tis I for the fandom ask if you don't mind :)

Fandom: TVD/TO => 17

Ship: Elejah (lmao to no one's surprise) => 6, 8

Character: Elijah Mikaelson => 2, 7

(from this ask game)

Fandom:

17. ...the world-building aspect of the story I have the greatest admiration for.

I have a lot of gripes about those shows (like... so many) but there's also a REASON I've been kinda obsessed with it for years now.

From the world-building perspective I guess I love the ever expanding mythology of the supernatural world. The way they started out the show with the basics of vampires and witches and werewolves. And then expanded into this whole mythos of the Originals and how vampires were a creation of witches; and how a werewolf bite was poison to vampires; the hybrids; the heretics; the tribrid; the humanity switch. etc.

Some of it occasionally became too much but it made for an extremely compelling world. And I have to give my kudos to that.

Ship:

6. ...what kind of AU fics I'm obsessed with reading about them (or would be if I could find one).

Every single American Gothic Canon Divergence AU fic I can get my hands on (...which is why I've written so many myself).

...which barely counts as AU I guess.

Fine. If I go full AU I guess I'd say they're pretty much the perfect ship for a Hades & Persephone AU (but a version where Elena makes a deal with Elijah to escape into the underworld because she's being pursued by a minor god who isn't taking no for an answer *cough* we all know who *cough*, and in short order Elijah's completely gone on her, and when the time comes Elena bites into that pomegranate viciously in full victory and with her teeth bared against the one who's trying to drag her back).

8. ...if I'm most interested in fics about them that focus on fluff, angst, humor, smut or actual plot?

ALLLLLLL OF IT, ALL AT ONCE. No, but really, my absolute favorite Elejah fics are the ones that combine the sweet scenes where Elena and Elijah are soft around each other, with pain and pining, and a few chuckles to break the tension and enough plot to give everything else some meat (won't say no to some smut either).

But I'm also just... obsessed with one shots in all colors of the rainbow too.

I'm not picky. It's got Elejah? I'm in.

Character:

2. ...how I would have chosen to change their story from canon.

Well. To start at the end, I would definitely not have Elijah decide to die with Klaus as if Rebekah, Kol, Freya, and Hope were chopped liver.

Cuz that is stupid and I hate it.

And the shipper in me wants to add a happy ending with Elena (because I too am embarrassingly predictable).

7. ...the scene that I think adds depth to their character or the relationship this character has with someone.

(I'm gonna answer this one through a ship lense cuz I can't and you can't stop me)

It's fascinating to me the way Elijah keeps bringing Elena on these romantic walks as he tells her his life story. Even while he thinks she's betrayed him because he knows she lied.

It doesn't matter what's going on Elijah seems to be compelled (unfortunate choice of words in this particular universe but there's no better word for it) for Elena to know him.

[cartoonfangirl1218]

Random thought but EOA popped into my head (as it does) and I realize that Elena and Ash truly are foils. Elena is all about her family. You could argue her ourney to being queen is as much as her learning to heal from family trauma, honoring them, protecting them and making their memory proud. Everything she does is for her people but is also for her family. She surrounds herself with them and they're at the heart of what she does.

Ash has a family and though she proclaims to love them, well Carla, it is not enough for her. Ash could be content with the family she has after the loss of her previous one, but it is not enough and that's the tragedy it is for Carla and Victor.

Idk if I'm explaining it well, it sounded so deep when I was musing on it before.

[dxncingxnmyown]

@francehqstarters | OPEN: (2/4)

There are significant dangers in the Palace of Versailles; the endless attacks, the revolving door of political allegiances, and the quiet ire of the everyday citizen that permeates the walls. But in this moment, none is more dangerous than dull conversation among the grieving widows of courts.

Oh! What a pitiful display it was - bright, tenacious nobles and royals reduced to their grief. Each one hanging onto their mourning clothes and wearing it like a new identity. Yet basking in misery is not her way (at least, not in the middle of the day), and the Princess is quick to round the corner at the sight of the tea party. It would seem as if she's running from one of the imposter guards that locked down the Palace, only a week ago. She's breathless when she finds refuge behind a pillar in the courtyard, pausing to glance back at her shoulder, eyes turning to the figure who bore witness to it all.

"Have you ever spent five hours sitting in a circle, listening to the same three stories, while knitting scarves for a partner no longer on this Earth?" Elena exhales in a breath, irritation clear in her tone. "It is more miserable than being locked with a bunch of antsy royals in a main hall, or chased in some god-awful woods with a search party."

[elenaes]

elena "if i fits i sits ( in ur lap )" gilbert

[thenxghtwemxt]

@classiqals | Maceon and Elena, On the Outskirts of the Gardens

She knew he would come.

Elena cannot claim to know much about her eldest brother. Once upon a time, she knew him like the back of her hand. Only to recognize how little she actually knew. Indeed, he is more of a ghost than a person anymore. But Elena knows that he would come, the moment she pressed her seal onto the letter. Call it a sister's intuition... Or a recognition of the paralyzing fear, playing so evidently in her brother's eyes. It is the only thing stronger than loyalty, Elena realizes, and fear is the reason why she mourned at an empty casket.

"You made it." A statement, not a question, as Elena excuses herself from the festivities to find Maceon in a secluded corner. "You look... Abysmal." She insults thickly, her judgemental eyes gazing upon his long hair and weathered features. "Surely in your webs of deceit, you could have woven yourself a half-decent attire."

[melpomeneprose]

// so went through the stickied parts of my copy of w.ar & p.eace (aka the everything that is not g.reat c.omet) and i just finished my comet / w&p playlists… and now i am sad about the K.uragins but especially Elena, cause … at least Anatole showing remorse for his impetuousness and begging forgiveness and then dying (in war) makes sense, and for however much T.olstoy hates not men he is fine to Sonya, Mary and Natasha. Hélène is just … more or less punished for everything after what makes up comet (cause it is only 1/3 of the story - the middle part the impulsive bisexuals - the Kuragins & Natasha making bad choices), but no Elena is not even given a semblance of redemption arc. She dies before being able to get out of her mutually bad marriage and tries to convert to r.oman c.atholicisn and then just dies by poison(?) overdose and no one cares… or rather everyone who would care is dead already, then the French take Moscow and it burns (yeah we know Napoleon loses but still..) :(

// also have the Anatole (in w&p canon) death fic I wrote forever ago…

[bellsc0nklin]

does anyone wanna write on discord? :)

[lilacerull0]

the most touching and the most influential aspect of elena's writing is that she takes these people who exist as representatives of the universe, of something intergal to human nature, their lives not in any way original, their destinies shared with thousands and she makes sure, almost instinctively, that we as readers remember them by their specific names. how many people have taken their own life for the same reasons franco mari did? how many people suffered alfonso's faith in exchange for one second of owning their identities? how many girls didn't get to go to school the way lila did? but that doesn't concern elena, does it... those numbers... she thinks of lila and she sees lila and these people who have done nothing but repeat the past exist in this space, exactly as elena remembers them, exist and belong entirely to themselves... these people are gifted originality and importance simply because this woman remembers them... and that means something!!!!!!!!!!

[lightrookie]

an exploration into loyalties , passion , violence && self-doubt. heavily headcanon based.

[ carrd ]