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⚠️ WARNING - long ask ahead, don't tell I didn't warn, sorry in advance guys 🤟
IM ERWITING THIS AS I GO ON THE FIC, which means omw to work, which means ill be all day thinking of this dani BC THE "the woman has a few moles on the right side of her face" GOT ME GOOOD yeees I love mo dani little moles sooo much.
(this all may be out of place? is just comments bc I'll probably explode if I dont write it down already so,,,
A CHET BAKER CD?? OUCH you have a good taste (played jazz for a while after it cause I was already wanting to hear since hanni recent live listening to the lp she brought, that was such a great live)
loved the way you played with the shelter 'care' word bc of the kang going first AND it was so funny haerin going like "your girl is just that way if you want to know" she is a little menace
ok so beach jazz scene, just got chills from them looking at each other and singing the same line cause I put to play the song too yk immersion, AND ARRURGH THE slip up and calling dani beautiful oh pls n dani still staring like i can imagine her goofy little teasing smile at yn bc of It oh oh they're so in love,, im just getting started aren't I?
yn just noticing dani has been talking about her when minji mentioned likejjhh giiirl I knew since haerin mentioned the same line dani had said about yn eyes. n ooooh you didn't continue the twinflame book c'mon (loved the bit of it)!!! it was getting interesting
also really important part; the way you always highlight the action of dani tilting her head squeezes my chest everytime i. swear . im weak for it
THEY KSSED 😭😭😭oh dani's tatto they're- WELL THEY KISSED !!! UARGH cuties
okaywait was so engaged reading that I forget this here, so the bathroom scene remind ME about the time thing, tbh I think you did this all fluffy scenes on purpose making us forget abt the plot, funny how wait this about to be big, like since when I read the summary I got surprised with this concept of death time tattoo, usually is 'time until you meet your soulmate' kinda of thing SO never read this plot before AND since the start I was like, afraid? of finishing this one like idk it it all comes to a end yk? idk shit you made me thoughtful, going back to read
OOP CLOSE THE DOOR??🫣? IM SEATED oh to hold danielle waist and and...😔 "maybe im your twin flame"YOURE😭MO DANI 😭 YOU ARE arhg youre giving me anxiety my dear writer
NOO YN don't isolate yourself oh if you're giving us another heartbroken dani im about to cry
LAST THEN 48 HOURS??? WAIITWAIT I want my fluffy where is fufflism
just thinking abt hyein ms lee and haerin starring at yn like 'is she dead??' gave me such a good laugh ngl
oh you... you made they death day on 722? ah....I swear I thought they were going to die without knowing abt they're soulmates like urgagrhggggsgghh lemme finish this up
before I cry with this little happy alternative universe I wanna say that I LOVED the way everything evolves around the beach, like since her parents till yn on th way of dyin,g it felt so right, the 'day off' where they spent all day gave me a thought like 'oh ms.lee surely planned it bc she knew dani walked on the morning' for me it was planned☝️🤓 (beabadoobee - beaches) <3
...to be honest I dont even know what to say to this one bc this all was just comments so yeah..im...this was good, good. literally spend all my shift thinking about finishing this one, the concept really got me good,, I.. maybe smth personal but i've been so...overloaded for a while so this one hitted soo close and made me want to,, live.. I think I just need a mo dani marsh in my life too
anyways😮💨 #really great, #changed my life, #made me cry, they're so many thoughts going on as a write this.. you're truly amazing. wish you a amazing day/week/weekend you deserve the best only!! 🫶
-with many admiration, 🤟
for this long wonderful lovely feedback i will provide. alonnnggg. reply and details plus insights HOORAAY im so glad to hear from u i absolutely love your responses u make me smile always
NO YWAAHAH HER MOLES I LOVE THEEMEMM they’re my fav feature other than her long eye lashes and smile and wait i love every feature muahahhaha
i loooove chet baker i have a like 8 hour playlist that has a lot of his music on there along with others ima. fiend for jazz i live for jazz festivals omfg and i need to find clips of hanni listening to music what!! i didn’t know this happened on her live…
no bc my fav thing ab these fics is that it’s lit up to me i thought i was the funniest person adding “kangs kare” im so #wordplay put me in coach
OMFG JAZZ Scene has some more behind it actually no it doesn’t i lied but basically i was like trying to just write and listen and the jazz playlist was lit on and CHET BAKER played and it was it’s always you and omfg i just ugh i started daydreaming and stopped writing for a moment LLOOL idk jazz makes me really lovey and dovey and emotional i think it’s beautiful it’s like a warm embrace or your lover tracing their fingers over your skin
aahahhshdh i think dani si the type of person to not shut up ab someone she likes and like she won’t even know she likes them yet but everyone around her knows LOL and mmmm detail the first thing dani said was “you have pretty eyes” and i tried to make that the first thing she said in the ending bc they’re twin flames and shit and aahhh repetition and similarity in universes … i’m rambling
ALSO this is so embarassing i had to literally search the difference between soulmates and twin flames and read a small article about twin flames and EVEN WORSE i had to make it sound professional and whatnot bc i had to quote on quote make a book in my fic ?-?:?: if yk what im saying but yeah that was a pain… cannot go on any longer i started making shit up FORREAAALLL all of that was pulled out of my ass i swear
NO BC PPL TILTINT THEIR HESDA IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME AND JUST PERKING YHRIR HEADS LIKE ANY MOVEMENT OF PPLS HEADA is so special to me it shows attention to details and emotion and desire to KNOW and be present in the moment and it’s just… so reassuring despite it being such a small gesture and i have realized over the years that i do it subconsciously with people i love and strangers that i click withINLVOE TJAT DETAIL i will use it in every fic ever idc if it’s repetitive i don’t care. i often tilt my head and whatnot bc im actually very nonverbal in real life usually (im just tired all the time) so i usually hum or give short responses and use my head to gesture the rest of what i need to convey liek this is so important to me guys…
I LOOOOVE writing kissing scenes but also no bc they get repetitive and yeah and also that tattoo hehehehsjwhhd i had to soft launch dani having the same tattoo LOL
i tried to make the whole death thing a little less repetitive and kind of brush over it until it got worse and worse and more serious and the whole concept was cheaply influenced by a movie where the two love interests know that they’re dying bc of their sickness but then i added a set, concrete date for dani and yn to die LOL idk lowk my creative juices were being juiced with this one… i was THINKING … and yeah i tried to fit in as many details and things that you’d have to remember form the beginning or middle idk i just rly like how i structured this one (the pacing is stilll iffy to me but wtv( bc i tried to have things tie together well and whatnot
makeout scene had me giggling and blushing while reading it was inspired by the anon who sent a makeout ask like smth ab “imagine making out w dani for the first time” and originally it wasn’t going to be there but i think it added to their bond and tension and lalalala yeah
no i couldn’t make them.die without knowing they’re meant to be but i had to try to figure out how to make the reveal angsty and i was like might as well have them figure out before they die and SOEAKJNG OF WHICH it took me a good amount of time while at work and making drinks to think of a way for them to die idk this story was so spontaneous and changed a lotLOL
and yes the whole beach thing was lowk inspired by summer strike bc i like the small town environment and how cute the beach is i haven’t even finished the drama im on ep like eight and haven’t watched since a few months ago LOL but i think the beach is just so calming and small towns r just sooo relaxing and nice compared tot he city (that being said i will always be a city girl…) idk beach city energy is just so wonderful and fits dani bc she grew up in newcastle and her whole vlog kinda gave me ideas for the world building and whatnot
i’m glad u love it!! and also just to mention ab the whole personal thing and living
i project a lot into my work and what i put down on the doc. idk if u can tell but i see a lot of beauty in things because i feel like its not worth dying if youre missing out on the intimacy of being loved and loving back plus just general interactions and platonic bonds built (ex: hyein and mrs lee) so like ywaaahh im glad you want to live!! there’s so much out there to experience and trust i understand exactly how u feel i looooowk have a lot of my own problems but writing helps me point out my dreams and things i find wonderful which makes me happy and then ppl enjoy the things that i romanticize and it makes me so so so so happy LOL
did u actually cry like many ppl r saying they cried or shed a tear and idk if i beleive it bc is it REALLT. that sad and emotional (maybe i just critics my writing tm) but yeah IM SO HAPPY THAT U ENJOYED!!!
u have a great week too you’re so sweet and i always love seeing your asks and feedback seriously, thank u!!!!
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augh ok heyy i have another oc question but this time about the old warrior lady<3<3
so you said she's seeking revange for her brothers death and i sanna know if you have thought about if she will succeed? or will she die in the process or something else?
also i wanna know about the old flame she had and their relation to her and her brother<3<3 MWUAH
thank u rye <333
the way i envisioned her story, the revenge and old flamme are linked :] it's a classic lady and the knight dynamic where she swore fidelity and protection to a lady who in turn shielded her in society and out of war, gave her money, titles and lands, weapons and means in return for her services to her cause and to serve her interests both in the city and on the fields of conflicts, the knight more focused on the art of war and practical realities, unfortunately for her leaving the politics to the lady. in the end, it's what comes to doom her, in order to secure new political and trading ties the lady had to get rid of the knight and her brother in any way she could
they met while they were still young, barely adults, and the knight immediately felt drawn to the lady, and the vows of fealty quickly took a meaning close to marriage for the both of them. and it wasn't one-sided, or a case of manipulation, the lady genuinely felt love, affection and desire for the knight, took pride in paying her well and seeing her ride under her name and protection, in coming back to her over and over, they enjoyed each other as well as their position in the war and political chess board, both thriving in their roles. it's just that as time went on, political pressure on her, from her family, various conflicts, and struggles on her lands took a toll and she grew paranoid and desperate to save her hold and power, seeing the failure of protecting her lands as too grave to even accept as possible, needing to uphold what was needed of her at any cost. so she betrayed the knight, sent their company to be massacred in some political play, leading them to be captured by an enemy. the lady knew of it, and gave orders for them to be executed, to clean up the whole mess and not leave any witness, protecting her lands and what she achieved, to protect herself from seeing the results of her choice. it was a case of forgetting personal wishes for the greater good, which broke her in some ways, and she changed.
except the knight made it out with her teeth bloody and hands drenched, and was torn between her vows of fidelity and her rigid sense of honor and the gaping wound the betrayal left in her, as well as her brother's death by her very own hands. because at first she had no idea, but soon learns who commanded the interrogation and murdered of her troops, and she became disillusioned then, her entire understanding of the world shaken upside down. she kept her rigid view of the world, separating the worthy from the weak, but bent it to her needs. she forsakes her knightly vows and titles, turned into a mercenary applying her skills to make a living any way she can but still couldn't shake her code of honor, in some fucked up way. it helped with the cognitive dissonance, to tell herself she was still serving a higher purpose when she was simply a gun for hire.
her vows of fidelity and revenge for her brother are in direct conflict, both linked to the same person, and when she meets the lady again she can't raise her blade against her. they're both haunted by each other, the knight stuck unable to answer to either vows made on her honor, the lady knowing she caused the creation of this ghost of the woman she loved, who can't bring herself to order her execution or ask her to come back.
but to be honest, i was too busy picturing her riding like a lonesome warrior on wasteland all smooth and cool to think about how she'll end yet </3 i just know she's haunted, and comes off as incredibly cold and harsh to ppl who meet her, discrediting anyone until they prove themselves worthy of trust and respect, but still protecting and fighting for others, this weird chasm between her old believes and the reality of her life. she refuses to grow attached to anyone, both from the trauma of loosing her brother, the person she was the closest to, and from the betrayal of the lady, the one she loved the most. she's a walking gaping maw of sorrow and anger
#asks#hangingoffence#nameless knight oc#this was in my drafts for weeks sorry </3#just realized i haven't touched on the brother much ough#gotta make a new post it's getting long lol
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"Mae." Voice is soft yet firm when he gently shakes Mae's shoulder. "Wake up." When her eyes finally peel open, he takes half a step back, still crouched low to the ground. "You feeling all right? I'm about to go hunting, and I need you to keep the fire going. We can't have it go out, if we can."
A peaceful slumber is interrupted by a familiar voice and a touch to the shoulder. Mae sits up and rubs her eyes. She blinks slowly, the green haired boy slowly coming into focus. With a yawn and wave of the hand, she answers, “Yeah, yeah... Got it, Alm.”
...
Fire. Alm. Her eyes widen and she frantically whips her head around. Something told her they weren’t in Garreg Mach anymore.
“Wait, where... How... What in Mila’s name is going on?!” She pinches the bridge of her nose. She could get an explanation from someone else later, she supposes, for now, she would do as he asked.
Alright, fire... Of all things, this was one thing she could do. After finding a couple of branches and a few leaves to toss in when necessary, she plops down by the fire drawing in the dirt with one of the sticks.
#rudlm#L&KMercy2020#support:alm#(( ty for sending! ))#(( can be one off or u can resp ))#(( no stove hands only explosion hands ))
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hey it's nanowrimo. i have tips bc i've done it about 34 times.
Don't edit. Ever. Stop it. If you just decide to start a new project half thru this one with all new characters, no problem. pick up and keep writing as if you'd already written the first half of that.
"but i spelled it wrong" whatever. "but the grammar" whatever. make it exist first. no time for sense. think like you're working on a typewriter. no backspace. only forward go.
Don't re-read further than a paragraph or two backwards. "did i mention the gun before?" listen - it doesn't matter. if you need there to be a gun there, the gun is there. put it back in once you finish the book.
"i forgot the specifics of X thing i already wrote" whatever. change it, make a note/comment to figure it out later, and just write what makes sense for the moment. "no raquel it's legit the characters name and origin" idc that character is now reborn as Claudius from Elsewhere. it's fine.
only you see your mistakes. nobody else knows. one of the ways writing and dance overlap - only you know the choreography. nobody else will know if you miss a step, so just keep dancing and pretend you meant to do it like that.
it's an illusion that you need to write linearly - from point A to point B to point C. Nah; that's just timeline propaganda. I've written a LOT of books out of order and just reordered them once i've finished. if you have a scene you'd LOVE to write but can't get there yet because of plot, just fuckin write the scene. I've always found its easier to establish "point F" "point J" and "Point A" and then wiggle my way between those scenes.
write what you WANT to write. 230 pages of smut? of well-researched discussion on bread? whatever. the point is to strengthen muscles however you can.
if you miss a day, a week, whatever. not the end of the world. we all have dry days. also time is a myth so u can do this challenge whenever u want.
as soon as you try to write for a specific audience, you kill your voice. you are writing for yourself. stop thinking about how people will take ur book. it don't matter. what matter is u, enjoying writing. i luv u.
play to your strengths. i have characters talk so much because i don't know how to write a plot if it kills me but i'm really good at dialogue so.
i love a flight of fancy. write a poem in there. shift tactics and write in code. keep it fun for yourself.
see what happens if you shift something major about ur main characters - gender, wealth, superpowers. or if you change point-of-view. or if you kill everyone in a big explosion. do NOT edit anything before this or after it. often these little weird one-off exercises teach me what interests me about what i'm working on. it is never what i thought. plus it is a fun way to add like 1k words.
stretch.
it's for fun and for practice. stop doing that project if it's giving you anxiety. once my nano was literally 50k words of half-started stories. just things i tried and tried and tried and wasn't able to flesh out. oops. but i am now 50k words of a better writer.
add dragons?
read books/listen to books on tape/etc. people often make the mistake of "buckling down" to just write. you need inspiration. you need to like. fill up on words. you need to remember how it feels to lose yourself in a story.
i don't have the time or space to really talk about this in this post but a lot of creative people turn to drugs/alcohol because it can help you be more creative. this is harmful, and walking a blade that only cuts deep. if you notice you and your loved ones are turning more to substances, please know i love you and i hope you are able to get help soon. i feel like this almost never gets mentioned because it's kind of a hazy underbelly to art. you are always more important than the work.
on that note. drink your fukin. water.
don't talk about a story until you've finished it. once you tell the story, it exists already, and isn't about discovery. i usually have a very canned "haha we'll see" response.
grapes :) tasty snack.
i love you be free.
#edit: the command not to talk about it is from personal experience!#i have heard Otherwise in the tags so i will edit to say:#if you've noticed that you tend to like Talk A Lot about ur piece but never WRITE it -#consider voice-to-text#also#u might be like me and ... need to figure it out on the PAGE and not OUT LOUD#i am often an auditory processor so i wont tell people specifics but i'll be like#huh. so i have a character who is in love .... and they don't know it#and my friend will be like ''oh they should kiss' and meanwhile#somehow#saying it out loud im like#yeah thank u ur right the dress SHOULD be purple that's what the problem has been <3#idk!!! it's up to you!!! my suggestion is to say LESS until you know for a FACT that saying MORE works better for you#-- always better to slowly unspool in ur exploration of that#than to accidentally talk too much and get Bored Of Project#idk idk idk#i have adhd so every book surprises me bc im like#wait where did any of this even COME FROM#and whatever little gremlin in my brain that writes is like :)#''heyyy girlie.......''#WHICH IS A LONG WAY TO SAY:#i didn't know about Not Talking About It as an option until i'd ruined a few projects!!#but there are people who need to do the other thing!!! and i love us both!!!!#wow brains are so funny!!!!
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u said send some band of brothers requests, so here i am ! maybe some headcanons or a fic of like lipton trying to keep u when ur in Bastogne together in a foxhole? NWs if not! you're wonderful! Have a wonderful day!!
oh my gosh anon, you are so sweet and wonderful. thank you for the request and kind words! i’m sorry for such a late response. i hope i interpreted the ask right! if not, let me know and i’ll gladly do a few edits to the fic.
also this gif of him 😳😳😳
Together — Carwood Lipton x Reader
contains: inaccurate descriptions of the war because its fanfiction (sorry not sorry). blood, violence, allusions to death. gender-neutral reader. i’ve never written for lipton before, so i apologize if he’s ooc. also, major writer’s block, i despise my writing right now but i think i should keep taking requests so i can try to overcome it! thank you for the request again, kind anon. more a/n at the end.
word count: 1.8k
You felt miserable. The freezing cold air versus your flimsy, dirt stained uniform made you curse out any god that may have been listening to your ridiculous rants fuelled by exhaustion. Your hair was greasy, your skin covered with bruises and grime, and for some reason you had the worst cramp in your left leg. It was probably from the position you had been sitting in for the past few hours.
The only light in your life had been the one and only Carwood Lipton.
He had been incredibly kind and patient with you, and always found something to do to keep your mind off of things.
However, you had no clue how you had landed in a foxhole with him. Typically, the medics would stick together, but your coworkers had decided to stick with other people. You weren’t complaining, of course - you had always had a little bit of a crush on Lipton, and any moment spent with him was cherished.
Unbeknownst to you, Lipton felt the same.
As Easy Company had arrived to the outskirts of Bastogne, Lipton immediately walked up to Winters and Nixon.
“Sir, we are outgunned and outmanned, there is no way we have enough supplies. Even with the car coming in with the extra ammo, there’s not nearly enough for us to hold out.” He tells the two men before them, who listened along.
“I know. But we have our orders.” Winters replies.
As insane as the situation was, Lipton nodded and was prepared to walk away to break the news to the others, but then an idea popped into his head.
“Sir, if I could just request one thing.” His cheeks are tinted a light pink, and his face feels warm. He hopes to god that Nixon won’t notice, because he knows it’ll end up with endless teasing.
“Yeah, what is it?” The redhead turns to face him properly, looking his friend up and down. Oh god, Lipton thinks to himself, he knows.
“If- if I may, I’d appreciate to, uh, share a foxhole with Doc L/N. I know most medics stick together, but I- I need them around my area in case anyone gets hurt.” It was the most bullshit excuse he had ever come up with, and he cringed while the words tumbled out of his mouth - but he knew that your presence would certainly calm the anxious storm that brewed in the back of his mind.
“Okay. Sure, why not?” Winters nods, before waving Lipton off.
As Lipton walks off, Nixon finally lets out a laugh.
“Holy shit, he’s head over heels for them.” He claps Winters on the back, who simply quirks his lips up in a subtle grin.
Lipton looks over to you, sitting across from him as you huff and puff warm air into your hands which cup around your mouth. It’s so cold out that he swears your cheeks have started forming icicles around them.
He shifts around, before taking the cheap canvas sheet that was on his lap, into his arms, and wrapping it around your trembling body.
“…Lip?” You mumble, surprised by his actions. He had never been bold enough to touch you, much less do something like this. Even if he never dared to touch you, the man always kept his eyes on you, however, constantly making sure you were within sight of him.
Speaking of which, you noticed that Lipton hadn’t responded to you yet, instead opting to stare into your soul. His warm, chocolate brown eyes were glazed over as they bore into yours, the intensity of his gaze making your face warm up. Maybe you would warm up enough to defrost your cheeks.
Looking at him, you saw the scar he sported on his right cheek, the bow of his lips, and the lines of laughter and age creasing the corners of his eyes. In that moment, you realized that you wanted to kiss him stupid.
Shaking out of your stupor, you cleared your throat before speaking.
“Thanks, Lip.”
Your words seemed to bring him back down to Earth.
“Yeah, yeah- of course.” He shoots you a small, nervous smile, before looking down at his hands.
The two of you sat in a quiet, albeit awkward, silence, hearing the distant laughter of the other men echoing in the snowy woods, the smell of cigarette smoke wafting through your nostrils.
Lipton breathes in deeply, before turning to look at you.
“Look, Y/N, I-“ he can’t finish his sentence, however, because the peace is broken.
An explosion too close to comfort goes off, and Lipton immediately shields your body from the dirt flying with his, covering the entirety of you.
For a split second, you let the warmth of his being envelop you, the comfort that he brings making you feel at home, even if it was just momentarily. His hands come up to cradle your face gently, and you immediately welcome his touch.
He opens his mouth to speak, thinking that it was just that the explosion was just an odd attack out, but he’s once again interrupted by multiple guns going off.
“Shit! Tell me later, sir!” You shout over the chaos, patting him on the cheek without a second thought. He nods before pushing himself off, his warmth being ripped away from you.
The scream of a soldier goes off a few hundred feet away from you, and your head pops out of the foxhole to assess where he may be.
“Get your head down, are you insane?!” Lipton yells at you, grabbing your head to pull you back down.
“I have to help him!” You bark back, glaring down at him. You loved him, you really did, but right now you had a job to do.
“No! Not now, the bullets are way too close. Dead bodies attract more dead bodies, wait until we’re not in their direct line of fire!”
You hear the same soldier screaming out for help, yelling about a lost leg. Oh fuck.
“Lip, please, he needs help.” You grit your teeth as you speak, knowing he’s right, but the doctor in you also knows that there isn’t much time left for the wounded man. “He’s not dead just yet.”
You try to get back up again, but Lipton literally wraps himself around you, making you topple over in the foxhole. You shout out in surprise, the warmth of his body once again surrounding you - but it was not the right time for this.
“Fuck!” Your voice is heart broken as you hit his chest in protest.
“I’m sorry, I can’t let you go out there and hurt yourself. I couldn’t live with myself.”
“I couldn’t live with myself if i knowingly let this man die. Now please, let me do my job. I’m begging you.” You look into his eyes, seeing his resolve crumbling underneath your gaze.
He reluctantly nods, strong arms slowly letting go of you. You begin to pick yourself back up, but his hand goes to the back of your neck, firmly holding your forehead against his. You freeze, thinking he’s going to hold you back again. Neither of you break eye contact as he finally opens his mouth to speak.
“You better come back to me.” Lipton whispers, his breath fanning over your cheeks.
“Yessir.” You tell him.
You tilt your helmet back slightly so you can give him a light kiss on his nose, before you finally drag yourself out of your safe haven.
Without looking back, you run towards the screaming, finally coming across the soldier who had been begging for a doctor.
“Hey, hey, I’m here.” You tell him, but you doubt he heard you over his cries of pain. You get your med pack, quickly assessing the damage as you unravel a roll of bandage and grab morphine, along with a tourniquet.
Expertly applying the tourniquet, you thank whoever could hear your inner monologue, as the Germans couldn’t see where you were through the debris and snow falling around you. You were relatively safe for now.
You apply the morphine before wrapping the man up, calling for a stretcher. Roe appears next to you and helps you grab your fellow soldier to lift him onto the stretcher, and he is promptly taken away from your hands.
“Looks like he’ll be okay,” Roe tries his best to reassure you. “You did a damn good job as always, Y/N.”
The puddle of blood surrounding you tells you otherwise.
The attack is over, and the dust and dirt finally settle underneath a thin layer of snow. You feel empty, the drying blood of the wounded man caked on your hands, stuck underneath your fingernails - impossible to remove until you get a proper shower. The constant reminder that life is fragile, and realistically, the soldier probably died of shock before he could’ve ever gotten the proper help he required.
You slowly trudge back to your foxhole, expecting to see Lipton, but it’s empty. Your heart sinks, you needed him, but you’re too exhausted to go looking for the man you love, so you plop yourself down in the hole and wrap his blanket around your body.
Tears sting at the back of your eyes, but crying seems too draining to even think about, so you take a deep breath and will the feeling away.
A moment later, you hear slow, heavy footsteps approaching you, and you lift your head up to come face-to-face to the man you desperately wanted to see.
“Hey.” Lipton softly speaks, almost as if he’s talking to a wild animal.
“Hi.”
“You’re not hurt, are you?”
You huff a weak laugh out of your nose. “No. Are you?”
“No.”
He sits down next to you, wrapping his arm around you and tugging you closer to him. You oblige, and once again welcome his warmth into your body. The two of you sit in silence once again, but this time there is no familiar laughter from the other men. It seems like the noise has simply died.
“Lip, I-“
“Y/N, there’s-“
The two of you finally let out a genuine laugh, smiling dumbly at each other.
“You go first.” He tells you.
“Fine, if you insist.” The small smile never leaves your face. “I, uh, I didn’t really think this through, so I hope I don’t sound like an idiot when I’m speaking.”
“You could never sound like an idiot to me.”
Your cheeks warmed up, something Lip had a talent of doing to you.
“Well… I really like you. I think I love you.” You looked at him as you spoke, your words nothing but honest and vulnerable.
Lipton breathes out, and gently grabs your face in his hands before firmly kissing you on your lips. The action smacks the air out of you, and your hands move to cradle the back of his neck in a desperate attempt to get him closer to you.
“I know I love you.” He says, after eventually pulling back.
And in that moment, you knew you’d be okay as long as you were together.
hoping you enjoyed! anon, if there’s anything i misinterpreted or did wrong, let me know and i’ll gladly change it 💕 thank you for reading!
#carwood lipton#carwood lipton x reader#band of brothers fanfiction#band of brothers x reader#band of brothers#fanfiction#ao3#archive of our own#self insert#//sfw
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Tuesday, june 22 2021
I've noticed I'm getting "the shiverys" or "the twitchy" a lot today. Like every time I FEEL something I take a moment to violently tic.... every time I think about certain things I tic.... good things, bad things, things from an hour ago and things from years ago. Tic, tic, tic.
Also, I have... some stuff to explain. Its really no big deal, but you know me: I'll freak out about it anyway. Basically I dissed my friend (rightfully so) around the time that we had just met cos they did something that threw me off.
He saw it in my phone... NOW. it's not RELEVANT anymore and I've since redacted that criticism...and now I gotta explain it to him anwyays. Oh well. I'm good at this stuff. I can get myself outta any situation. I dont even know why I'm talking like this tho... it's not a "Situation" it's just smthn I gotta explain rq.
Oh, today's song recommendation is Spirit Crusher by Death. I'm a huge Death fan...
Also! I gotta study... for my replacement exam. How stressful. Its about photosynthesis, but like, it's not simple. We went DEEP inside those fucking leaves.
One sec, lemme hook up my IV tube
Not an ACTUAL IV tube... just my headphones. But since I'm so #emo, it might as well be a fucking IV tube with the way that I cant live without it.
Its 3:08 and I'm walking home now. I was upset last night but me and Star have made up now lol... it was thAt easy. I'm so defective, making shit hard when it doesnt need to be.
It's so hot out damn. Idk. I had school today, so I had Bio class... I ACTUALLY PAID ATTENTION for once. I had lunch with Star and her friend group, and I honestly kinda feel like they're MY friends now too, even just a little bit.
Actually, I used to rant about feeling lonely like all the time but now I have so many friends it's crazy they all keep inviting me places and it's like people WANT ME AROUND... idk. It makes me happy.
Today I gotta ask if tommroow after school I can go to Bee's house to watch Supernatural (famous homoerotic ghost show)
I should also add songs to Erin's spotify playlist for our picnic saturday which I still need permission to go to.
I gotta ask for Wednesday after school to watch Insidious with Jay which is apparently really good
Also hes the friend that I gotta explain stuff to... the DrAmA... the ThEaTrE....
Update my dad said yes to hanging out with Bee but first I'm gonna miss school to fix my broken brackets on my braces
Also turns out the house I THOUGHT we were moving into has substantial damage from shifting so... we aRENT moving there.
In case you didn't know, shifting is when like the house that's been built literally SHIFTS like it moves around.
Anwyays Jay just texted me... I'm gonna change into shorts since it's hot, set up my study area,.... and respond to him.
The time is 3:22 p.m.
Wish me. Luck.
Luck is plentiful! As it so often is in my risky, risky life.
I play my cards right. It's a learnt skill.
But also there wasnt much to explain since it passed already and was tiny anywyas.
XD so I've made up with the whole goddamn world by now.
Its 6:31, we saw 1 house. Only one. Its kinda hot out but I'm gonna bike now since we just had supper. I finally finished my homework... I just have to finish one mixed media piece as my final project for art!
Friday is my replacement. On photosynthesis and cell resp. We know this. But what I didn't mention, or I dont THINK I did, is that if I finish my art project before then I have the second block FREE!!! Me, Star, and her friend
A are planning to leave for second block and maybe get mint chocolate chip ice cream!
Also I might eat her out XD
Anyways idk. I hope I can bike tonight to call Jay.
I keep accidentally using people's real names here then having to correct it... I dont know how much i care about MY identity being discovered... but to have my friends doxxed would suck.
Man I feel bad abt saying fuck star last night cos we made up....
Wait we r looking at another house? Idk I'm in the car still waiting to go home
Oh wait no now we r goin home
Its 6:39... I hope I still have time.
I went biking, called Jay. Went home. Idk, friendly conversation... we talked more tonight and I also talked to my other friend A. Jay is... I LOVE HIM?? SO MUCH??? I feel so happy. Talking to him thinking about him seeing his STUPID FUCKING FACE JESUS. his eyes alone... I could stare at his face all day probably. I want to kiss him... hOLD HIS HAND... omg... huG HIM!!! Eofjwpxjwie he's so sweet like I can't even... and I'm proabably not good enough for him like. Wtf. Hes easily a 10. And I dont rate things outta 10. How tf do I end up with HIM? Doing stuff, as friends. Like wHAT. I guess I got lucky XD. He says he loves my personality and I'm hot XD ofc I dont see it myself. But like. JESUS CHRIST he could proabably easily pull whOever. XD me?
Whatever though. As long as we r together and stuff. I LOVE HIM A LOT. he said he loved me. Every time he says that it makes me so overly happy.
Maybe I'm just sappy and stuff.... whatever. I think it would be nice to be hugged by him.
Yeah I'm cheesy.
I'm sorta tired now so maybe I'm not writing the best.
I just keep thinkinf about love. Love is a muscle of evil suggestion. But how evil can it really be? I am just a human being and that is all. Everything else is applied. I am just a human being with soemthing in my heart that pulls me all over the place. Love is this strange thing because I'm fucked up and to be able to love without that fucked up part of me, without the damage... is this complicated, hard thing to do and I can NEVER tell if I'm doing it right but I know I'm DOING IT. I know I FEEL LOVE. And soemtimes it's such an intense thing like when you go to surf on a wave at the beach with ur belly but u hit it wrong and it's so big and overwhelming it washes over you and PULLS you down to the bottom and smushes your face into the sand and YOU CANT BREATHE jesus Christ it's like that.
Or maybe I just want to experience love as it should be felt.
Obviously all of my problems surrounding this Damage could be easily fixed if I went to therapy but. there are reasons I can't.
I LOVE a lot. Too much for my own good. Enough to hurt me, get me into trouble, etc etc but also... enough to liberate me. I LOVE. I love Jay. So much. LIKE. MY BRAIN ORBITS AROUND HIM CONSTANTLY THINKING OF HIM AND PRAISING HIM AND MWUAH HE IS SO LOVELY I BOW BEFORE HIM...
I think as much as I love, a lot of the times I tend to focus even more on BEING loved.
If I am told I am loved, and shOwN I am loved... it is one of the most powerful things. Especially since I was literally emotionally neglected in childhood... yeah. I feel like I'm always trying to fill that hole.
Not EVERY feeling I have is for that reaosn but sometimes, if you tell me you love me, show me you love me, hug me,... I'll like start crying,,, that's the childhood emotional neglect kicking in. If you call me #smol and #cute and say I look young and fragile which happens more often than you'd think XD, I know I'm not supposed to like that shit, so I act like I dont....but I do. Which is PROBABLY ALSO THE CEN 🤪 like whatever lol
Anwyays I'm fucked up
You see how quickly things become complicated in my mind?
Convoluted? Is that the word?
Whatever. I OVERCOMPLICATE THINGS COS I OVERTHINK THEM BECAUSE I'm LITERALLY MENTALLY ILL IN SO MANY DIFFERENT WAYS. I'm not joking. I obviously have unresolved undiagnosed "issues"
I do Suspect things, though.
I can make a list
Maybe I shouldn't.
Maybe I will.
I shouldnt.
Whatever.
I used to hate when people brought up my self harm. I would actually panic. I still self harm but now? Now I'm fine with anyone talking about it as long as it's not an adult who can get me into trouble/force me into therapy over it. Because really? I kinda like having it mentioned. It's kinda validating and it's like hey... people can see that I'm sick.
I dont do it so people talk to me about it though. Dont get me wrong. If I did, I'd go vertically on the arms, not for suicide but so it healed and people would ask XD.
My scars are actually VERY hidden... cos I never intended for ANYONE to see. But for those who DO see them,,,, it's nice soemtimes to have people express concern.
I dont wanna be PITIED or anything, but idk I just think to myself "wow, they're CONCERNED... about ME... they arent angry or mean... they didnt yell at me or threaten me... they respect my autonomy and privacy...
And they CARE ABOUT ME..." and it makes me cry.
That's also the CEN.
I dont know. I just like when people express genuine concern. Even if they see and then just ask if I'm okay. That's all it takes cos then I go wow.
Its validating and irs lovely because finally people care... FINALLY PEOPLE CARE. FINALLY I GET SOME EMPATHY OR SYMPATHY AND NO ANGER.
Even just having them brought up tells me its noticeable enough
My brain does this thing where it thinks nothing bad that's ever happened to me was Bad Enough for me to be upset about.
And I dont know... its nice sometimes to be told shit like "omg that looks so bad" or to see that people who do see my cuts are somewhat shocked or revolted... it's nice because I go... "hey, it was bad enough for them..."
Or to have people comment on them with concern. Just ANYTHINT WHERE PEOPLE NOTICE IT AND ARENT ASSHOLES ABOUT IT IS VALIDATING.
Because I'm not used to that...
Because CEN
I'm. The worst perosn on the fucking planet.
I should kill myself.
I suddenly actually feel so self hating I do want to kill myself... oh god.
I ruin everything. Everything. Everything. Everything. What have I done. Like. Why. Oh god.
I'm just remembering when Star said my kindness seemed like an act. And how I've been called out for seeming fake like 2 other times.
DO I SEEM FAKE???? I DONT EVER PUT ON ACTS OF KINDESS.... CONCIOUSLY? but the very idea that I could be perceived that way...
Should I like not try to be nice or some shit?
Jesus christ she hurts my feelings even now when it was a long time ago.
But I cant blame her. I can't blame anyone for how i feel except my parents because they left me with fucking. Heart nerve damage or some shit.
I'm tired and now I'm sad too. Goodnight guys.
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Whumptober Day 21: Laced Drink -- Eric Version
I wrote a King Version yesterday on the actual day of the prompt, but people in the discord wanted to see Eric in pain so here we go!
Tag List: @demon-dark-666 @devon-rever-860
Eric was...uncomfortable, to say the least.
Bim had just finished wrapping up a season of his show, and to celebrate, he’d thrown a big party at his studio, with of course, an invitation extended to the other egos. Wilford was practically glowing with pride, doing everything short of parading Bim around on his shoulders. The other egos were milling about, chatting with Bim’s staff, each other, or the other people Bim had invited that Eric didn’t even know. There was...a lot of people, in short, and Eric couldn’t help the instinct to run and hide.
Somehow, he found himself at the bar. He knew he couldn’t drink -- none of the egos could, except Dark, Wilford, and the Jims -- but it was a place to sit, out of the way, and Eric took the stool closest to the wall. He pulled out his phone, perfectly content to play Cat Game and ignore the party behind him until Bim said they could go home.
He shrunk further, hunching his shoulders, when someone slid into the stool next to him. “Hi.”
Eric’s eyes flicked toward the person, and he immediately flushed. Of course Bim would only invite attractive people to his party, Bim didn’t know the meaning of the word subtly, and judging by the way he was scanning the crowd earlier, Eric had a feeling Bim himself would come home much later with an organ freezer in tow and a bloody suit in the trunk of his car. Eric shuddered, and glanced at them again. He tried for a smile. “Uh...hi.”
The person smiled. It was a woman, with pretty red hair and freckles covering her face, and Eric’s blush deepened. “Aw, you’re cute. What’s your name, hun?”
Slowly, Eric shoved his phone back in his pocket, committing himself to the social interaction. “Um...E-Eric.”
Her smile grew. “I’m Andromeda. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Eric wasn’t quite sure how to respond to the tone her voice took, but he didn’t have to dwell on it long as she kept talking. “So, why were you invited? How do know Mr. Trimmer?”
Eric brightened. “Oh, he’s --” He stopped short. He didn’t want to say ‘he’s my father-figure because my real dad was an abusive prick’. That might sound a bit...strange, considering he and Bim physically looked to be the same age. He cleared his throat. “We’re...really close. Yeah. He’s...family.”
He shuddered a little under Andromeda’s gaze. “Well isn’t that cute. You really are adorable.”
Eric was fairly certain he was melting he was blushing so hard. “Thanks...I think...but um...h-how do you know him?”
Andromeda leaned back, crossing one leg over the other. “Oh I’ve known Mr. Trimmer since he was brand new. My company was one of his first sponsors. He was such an enthusiastic, pretty little thing, and my investment has paid off quite well.” Her gaze flicked over to the party, and Eric turned his head to follow. Bim was laughing in the middle of the crowd, one arm around King’s waist, and Eric watched as he pressed a big, affectionate kiss to the corner of King’s mouth, Bim only laughing harder as King promptly hid in his cape. When Eric turned back around, there was something smoldering in Andromeda’s eyes. “Perhaps it hasn’t turned out in every way I would’ve liked, but...” She sighed, then dug around in her little handbag, pulling out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.
Eric’s eyes widened as she placed the cigarette in her mouth, lifting up the lighter. “U-um, I-I-I don’t think Bim would like you smoking in here.”
She raised an eyebrow, and the lighter finally lit. She took a long drag, then blew a steady stream of smoke up into the air. “What Mr. Trimmer doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” She waved down the bartender, then glanced at Eric again. “I noticed you didn’t have a drink, hun. A bit sad to sit at a bar and not drink.”
Eric’s gaze darted to the floor. “Oh, a-actually, I can’t drink. Heart stuff. If I have one, it’ll kill me.”
Her eyebrow arched further, and she let out a surprised laugh. “Well, that’s unfortunate. I was gonna offer to buy you a drink, but I guess that’s off the table. Or, is a Shirley Temple a possibility?”
Eric perked up, smiling a little. “Oh, I loved those growing up! I haven’t had one in years!”
Andromeda smirked, taking another drag of her cigarette. “It’s on me, hun, as long as you promise we can still chat.”
Eric’s blush -- which had begun to fade -- rapidly returned. “Sure. I don’t see why not. I don’t plan on going out there anytime soon,” he smiled, “and it’d be nice to have some company.”
Andromeda laughed, but something about it felt...wrong, to Eric. Still, he said nothing, and took his drink when it arrived. He only managed one sip, however, before someone shouted his name, and he spun around. Bim was waving at him, gesturing for him to come over with a broad grin. Eric paled, shaking his head adamantly, and Bim pouted, but relented when he was dragged back into conversation with a young man with too bright a smile.
Eric shuddered, and turned back to the bar, pulling his drink closer. Andromeda was smiling, blowing rings of smoke into the air the second Bim’s back was turned and sipping on her own drink that Eric was fairly certain was just straight whiskey. He smiled back, sipping his drink.
They talked for a while, idly. Eric had to consciously keep from squirming under her gaze sometimes. Her expression and the way she looked at him...it reminded him of the lions and tigers he worked with at the zoo whenever it was time to feed them. He didn’t exactly like it, but, well...anxiety kept him from saying anything. She was nice, she bought him another drink, and Eric didn’t want to be rude when she’d been so generous.
After a while though...Eric began to feel funny. The world’s colors began to swirl together in a blinding, dizzying kaleidoscope, and he groaned, grinding the heel of one hand into his eyes. That only seemed to make it worse, and Eric pulled his glasses off, folding them up and resting them on the bar. “An -- Androm --” He squeezed both eyes shut, resting his forehead on the bar. “I-I-I don’t -- I don’t --”
There was a hand on his back, rubbing soothing circles. “Do you want me to help you to the bathroom, hun? You don’t look so good.”
Eric whimpered, and nodded. Andromeda guided him off the bar stool, a steady hand gripping his shoulder and guiding him along. Eric hardly noticed he’d left his glasses on the bar, too busy trying not to vomit at the sudden assault of swirling colors. The people that filled the room warped before his very eyes, looking like they were all trapped in funhouse mirrors. He closed his eyes again, stumbling along and leaning heavily on Andromeda as she led him out of the studio.
His brow furrowed. He’d been to Bim’s studio often enough to know his way around, and the turns they were taking didn’t seem right... He opened his eyes again, paling at the sudden assault of the harsh light. He recognized the hallway regardless, but -- “A-Andromeda, the b-b-bathrooms are the other way --”
He tripped over his own feet, and Andromeda caught him. “Shh, I know, hun. We’re going a different way, down a couple levels.”
Eric drew his mouth in a tight line, squinting at her quizzically and trying to ignore the way her face twisted and inverted in on itself. “Wh...why...?”
Andromeda just smiled. “You’ll see.”
She pulled him into the elevator, and the second it started moving, Eric fell. He slumped to the floor, his coordination and balance shot to Hell, but he didn’t know why. Why was this happening to him, he didn’t have anything beyond the two drinks, and they weren’t even alcoholic! Why --
The elevator doors slid open, and Eric was dragged out by Andromeda lifting him up again. It was another studio, looked like one of the advertising floors. There was a bunch of props and half-built sets scattered about the space. Andromeda seemed to know exactly where she was going, dragging Eric unwillingly for the ride now. “An-Andromeda --”
“Shut up.”
She tossed him gracelessly onto one of the beds that stood in at least half of the sets. Eric convulsed, back arching, and eyes becoming glazed and clouded as the colors swirled before him in an endless, hypnotic spiral. He started when there was a hand on his jeans, unbuckling his belt and undoing the front of his pants. Eric suddenly felt very sick, beyond the effects of whatever he’d been given, and one of his hands loosely gripped Andromeda’s wrist, trying to pull her hand away from him. “No -- don’t --”
She easily batted his hand away, sticking her hand down the front of his jeans. “Aw, come on, now, hun! This’ll be fun for the both of us if you just relax. Maybe this will teach Mr. Trimmer not the brush me off --” She did something with her hand, and Eric sobbed, tears falling freely down his face. She grinned. “-- and you really are cute. Perhaps I’ll keep you around when all is said and done.”
And then she was kissing him.
Eric just shook and sobbed as she claimed what she wanted, her hand continuing to rub at the front of his underwear. She moved to straddle him, pulling her hand away to instead grind against him, her nails digging into his shoulders. Eric just closed his eyes, trying to block out the colors, block out the sounds she was making, he wanted to go home --
Her weight suddenly vanished from his body, followed quickly by a short scream. Eric opened his eyes. Dark was standing protectively at the side of the bed, his aura writhing furiously as his outline flickered. Rage was prominent in his expression, his lips curled up in a snarl, his eyes glowing red and blue respectively. His voice echoed, multi-layered. “Don’t you dare touch him.”
Andromeda got unsteadily to her feet. Her hair was messed up, one of her heels snapped, but she looked just as furious, seemingly uncaring as Dark’s aura crept toward her. “And who the Hell are you?”
Dark didn’t say anything. He didn’t have to. His shell cracked, his respective red and blue mirror images standing to either side of him, and a piercing, multi-layered, blood-curdling scream filled the room without Dark ever opening his mouth. It wouldn’t stop, Eric’s ears rang, his head hurt, the colors’ spinning slowed to a blinding pulse that made him sick --
Dark’s aura wrapped around his head, plunging him into darkness. The scream was muffled now, and Eric sighed in relief. He didn’t know how long he laid there, nor did he care to; with how fuzzy his head was, it could’ve been two minutes, or two hours, and he wouldn’t know the difference. When Dark’s aura finally withdrew, Eric was calmer, dangerously so, his breathing slow and shallow with eyes half-lidded and drooling a little. He hardly heard Dark swear, groaning softly when Dark picked him up. Dark said something else, his voice high with panic, but Eric couldn’t comprehend what he was saying. He caught Dr. Iplier’s name, but --
Eric passed out.
#eric derekson#bim trimmer#darkiplier#whumptober day 21#laced drink#attempted rape#drugs#hallucinations#implied cannibalism#my writing#fanfic
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People are saying that fore and blood is SO TOTALLY OBVIOUSLY meant to show D@ny as Alysanne reborn and that Sansa is meant to be Alaric in this metaphor bc they are both stern, u forgiving, and cold (what) and it foreshadows that they're gonna be the best of friends. Like... lmfao how do people still thing that Good Queen Alysanne translates to Good Queen D@ny?? The idea that this foreshadows that sansa will betray the north and be bffs with D@ny is infinitely more delulu than any Jonsa theory.
Dear nonny,
yes, it is so hilarious isn’t it? As far as I am aware the Jonsa fam has pointed out that Alysanne and Sansa have similarities for quite some time. I read the first post on that topic just after season 6. So, this has been discussed way before the excerpt was published, and it is certainly not something that we came up with out of thin air.
I just give some examples for parallels of Alysanne with Sansa and juxtapositions resp. foils with Da€nerys to drive home the point:
Even a lord as stern and flinty as Alaric Stark found himself helpless before Queen Alysanne’s stubborn charm. (Blood and Fire, excerpt)
The women of Winterfell were taken by the queen’s charms as well, once they grew to know her; Her Grace became particularly close with Lord Alaric’s daughter, Alarra. (Blood and Fire, excerpt)
Now, compare this to Sansa exercising her social skills:
She is good at this, he thought, as he watched her tell Lord Gyles that his cough was sounding better, compliment Elinor Tyrell on her gown, and question Jalabhar Xho about wedding customs in the Summer Isles. His cousin Ser Lancel had been brought down by Ser Kevan, the first time he'd left his sickbed since the battle. He looks ghastly. Lancel's hair had turned white and brittle, and he was thin as a stick. Without his father beside him holding him up, he would surely have collapsed. Yet when Sansa praised his valor and said how good it was to see him getting strong again, both Lancel and Ser Kevan beamed. She would have made Joffrey a good queen and a better wife if he'd had the sense to love her. (ASOS, Tyrion VIII)
This was already pointed out by @thelawyerthatwaspromised here (x). I would add that Sansa is here friendly towards everybody despite the fact that she is forced to attend the occasion at the Lannister court. She has no reason to be nice to any of these people and yet she is.
Sansa knows how important it is to show courtesy by entertaining people as we can see in AFFC when the Lord Protector and her entertain the Lords Declarant and try to negotiate with them.
She did indeed. She saw to the mulling of the wine first, found a suitable wheel of sharp white cheese, and commanded the cook to bake bread enough for twenty, in case the Lords Declarant brought more men than expected. .... The solar next. Its floor was covered by a Myrish carpet, so there was no need to lay down rushes. Alayne asked two serving men to erect the trestle table and bring up eight of the heavy oak-and-leather chairs. For a feast she would have placed one at the head of the table, one at the foot, and three along each side, but this was no feast. She had the men arrange six chairs on one side of the table, two on the other. ... The candles had been lighted, she was pleased to see; the solar smelled of nutmeg and other costly spices. She went to fetch the flagon whilst the visitors arranged themselves side by side... (AFFC, Alayne I)
Compare this to Da€nerys’ way of getting people on her side:
"Unsullied!" Dany galloped before them, her silver-gold braid flying behind her, her bell chiming with every stride. "Slay the Good Masters, slay the soldiers, slay every man who wears a tokar or holds a whip, but harm no child under twelve, and strike the chains off every slave you see." She raised the harpy's fingers in the air . . . and then she flung the scourge aside. "Freedom!" she sang out. "Dracarys! Dracarys!"
"Dracarys!" they shouted back, the sweetest word she'd ever heard. "Dracarys! Dracarys!" And all around them slavers ran and sobbed and begged and died, and the dusty air was filled with spears and fire.(ASOS, Da€nerys III)
While very effective, that is not exactly charming, neither is the show’s “They can live in my new world or die in their old” nor “Bend the knee or die”.
Even, when Da€nerys tries to charm people for peace, she is not exactly good at it:
Hizdahr ignored the eunuch. "Magnificence, the people of Meereen have come to celebrate our union. You heard them cheering you. Do not cast away their love."
"It was my floppy ears they cheered, not me. Take me from this abbatoir, husband." She could hear the boar snorting, the shouts of the spearmen, the crack of the pitmaster's whip.
"Sweet lady, no. Stay only a while longer. For the folly, and one last match. Close your eyes, no one will see. They will be watching Belaquo and Ghogor. This is no time for—"(ADWD, Da€nerys IX)
So, it should be obvious that charming is not the same as conquering (or coercing). Sansa has the parallels to Alysanne’s charme. What about Alaric then? I saw a theory that he is Stannis, and that Alysanne’s way from Whiteharbour to Winterfell foreshadows Sansa’s way from the Vale to Winterfell. I must admit that Alaric has similarities to Stannis, but I doubt that it will be Stannis who takes Winterfell in the books.
I think that Lord Alaric might be a nod to the Lord Royces, Brone Yohn Royce and Nestor Royce. Nestor Royce gets a bonus for having a daughter Myranda, that befriends Alayne /Sansa (and hopefully won’t betray her....)
Lord Nestor Royce seemed gruff and stern... (ASOS, Sansa VII)
Last of all came the Royces, Lord Nestor and Bronze Yohn. The Lord of Runestone stood as tall as the Hound. Though his hair was grey and his face lined, Lord Yohn still looked as though he could break most younger men like twigs in those huge gnarled hands. His seamed and solemn face brought back all of Sansa's memories of his time at Winterfell. She remembered him at table, speaking quietly with her mother. She heard his voice booming off the walls when he rode back from a hunt with a buck behind his saddle.(AFFC, Alayne I)
There is another tidbit in the Blood and Fire excerpt that might remind us of Sansa:
Burley was apologetic for the quality of the food and drink presented to the queen, and the rudeness of the accommodations at Castle Black. “We do what we can, Your Grace,” the Lord Commander explained, “but our beds are hard, our halls are cold, and our food—”
“—is nourishing,” the queen finished. “And that is all that I require. It will please me to eat as you do.” (Blood and Fire, excerpt)
The Jonsa fam, @jonbonsnowvi of course has already pointed out that this scene is mirrored in the show, when Sansa tells Dolorous Edd, that the food at the Wall is fine (x, with the additions!).
As for book evidence you might put that alongside this:
The boy was unappeased. "I wanted eggs today."
"Sweetrobin, there are no eggs, you know that. Please, eat your porridge, it's very nice." She ate a spoonful of her own. (AFFC, Alayne I)
Now compare this to Da€nerys:
"Yes," said Reznak, "and afterward there is a special cake. A women's cake, baked only for betrothals. Men are not allowed to taste it. I am told it is delicious. Magical."
And if my womb is withered and my female parts accursed, is there a special cake for that as well? "Hizdahr zo Loraq may inspect my women's parts after we are wed." Khal Drogo found no fault with them, why should he? "Let his mother and his sisters examine one another and share the special cake. I shall not be eating it. Nor shall I wash the noble Hizdahr's noble feet." (ADWD, Da€nerys VI)
This is the wedding tradition of the people Da€nerys wants to rule and she just rejects it. I must admit that there is Da€nerys fear that Hizdahr or his family might realise that she is barren, and there is the aspect that the wedding has several rituals that set the wife beneath the husband, but still....
When her status depended on eating something she didn’t like, Da€nerys did so. She ate the raw horse heart to win the Dothraki over, so she does know how to do this, but in Mereen with her dragons she does not adhere to the local customs as would have been polite.
So, I guess it should be obvious who is parallel to Alysanne and who is not.... I mean Alysanne and Da€nerys both are Targs and both have dragons, there is that, but that is only a superficial similarity.... I mean so did Rhaenyra, and Rhaenyra is a far closer parallel to Da€nerys than Alysanne.
As for claiming that Jonsa shippers now suddenly want Sansa to have a dragon, that is really, really funny. We can see Alysanne as foreshadowing of Sansa a) by appreciating the characteristics the queens share and b) without wanting Sansa to become an exact copy and c) without wanting everything in that excerpt to be about Sansa. The little tidbit about Alysanne’s dragon not wanting to fly north of the Wall certainly points to other plot points.
It is a question of what are actual parallels, what are foils, what are juxtapositions.... It is a matter of how you analyse the text, but only after a fashion. Some literal analysis makes more sense than others. But I wouldn’t call the ones I disagree with delulu. I dislike being called that myself and I will not call other real people who happen to have other shipping preferences and a different reading of the text with this word, no matter the provocation.
Thanks for the ask!
#anon ask#Jonsa#Sansa Stark#alysanne targaryen#Good Queen Alysanne#Sansa/Alysanne parallels#fire and blood book
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Animals, Apparently, and Children: Shy, sweet & incredibly gentle Linda Id 65999, 3 Yrs., 77 lbs. of Love, at Manhattan ACC TO BE KILLED – 6/27/2019 *** SWEET, SHY, GENTLE ROTTIE GIRL DREAMS OF A FAMILY & LOVE *** <3 She’s big, sweet, shy, and gentle. LINDA is overwhelmed at the shelter by all the craziness there, so during her assessment, she sought comfort from the assessor, leaning in, seeking contact, seeking touch and a friendly voice. Yes, she is shy, but Rotties are not dogs meant for places like this. They are family dogs, they are thoughtful dogs, they are playful, happy, mellow companions who put a premium on giving their entire hearts to the people they love. Unfortunately, Linda is only 3 years old and her death is imminent if no one will lend her a hand. She did GREAT on here shelter assessment, and she got a wonderful BLUE rating on her behavior at medical. She just has no owner surrender notes so that we can hear about all her wonderful qualities, and all her sweetness. Will you give this girl a soft place to land? She will reward you with love, loyalty, and a tender heart. If you are an experienced foster or adopter in an adult only home (no children under age 13, please due to her shyness), hurry and message our page or email us at [email protected] for assistance saving her life. LINDA, ID# 65999, 3 Yrs. Old, 77.3 lbs, Unaltered Female Manhattan ACC, Large Mixed Breed, Black / Tan I came to the shelter as an Agency, 6/15/2019 Shelter Assessment Rating: New Hope Rescue Only Behavior Condition: 2. Blue AT RISK NOTE: Linda has shown reactive behaviors while on leash, and will need behavior modification and reward based training. Linda would be best suited for placement with a new hope partner that can provide the necessary behavior modification. Medically, Linda was diagnosed with canine infectious respiratory disease complex which is contagious to other animals and will require in home care. SHELTER ASSESSMENT SUMMARIES – DATE OF ASSESSMENT, 6/16/2019: Leash Walking Strength and pulling: Mild Reactivity to humans: None Reactivity to dogs: None Leash walking comments: Sociability Loose in room (15-20 seconds): Moderately social, timid Call over: Approaches with coaxing Sociability comments: Handling Soft handling: Seeks contact, soft Exuberant handling: Seeks contact, soft Handling comments: Arousal Jog: Follows, loose Arousal comments: Knock Knock Comments: No response Toy Toy comments: No interest PLAYGROUP NOTES – DOG TO DOG SUMMARIES: 6/15: When introduced off leash to a male greeter dog, Linda greets with tense body. She begins to growl for lingering face to face greeting. ENERGY LEVEL:: Linda displays a medium energy level in the care center. We cannot be certain of her behavior in a new home environment though recommend daily mental and physical stimulation as a way to direct her energy and enthusiasm. IN SHELTER OBSERVATIONS:: 6/19: While walking Linda outside on leash, handlers have reported Linda to lunge at strangers as well as bicycles. She readily refocuses onto the handler with the use of treats. BEHAVIOR DETERMINATION:: New Hope Only Behavior Asilomar: TM - Treatable-Manageable Recommendations:: No children (under 13) Recommendations comments:: No children: Linda has been a bit fearful and timid in the care center. She also has been observed lunging at strangers and bicycles while walking on leash. For these reasons we feel she may be best set up to succeed in a home without children at this time. Place with a New Hope partner: Due to the severity of the reactivity observed in the care center, we feel Linda would be best set up to succeed if placed with an experienced rescue partner who can provide any necessary behavior modification (force-free, positive reinforcement-based) and re-evaluate behavior in a stable home environment before placement into a permanent home. Potential challenges: : Fearful,On-leash reactivity/barrier frustration Potential challenges comments:: Linda appears shy and timid initially though has been observed to warm up and become friendly/attention seeking. Please see handout on Decompression period. While walking Linda on leash, she has been reported to lunge/growl at strangers as well as bicycles. She readily refocuses back onto the handler with the use of treats. Please see handout on On leash reactivity/barrier frustration. MEDICAL NOTES 6/18/2019 [DVM Intake] DVM Intake Exam Estimated age: 3-4 years Microchip noted on Intake? Yes History : Found running around lose in Central Park. Brought in by police. Subjective: BAR Observed Behavior -Slightly timid but overall she did well. Took treats nicely. Calm throughout exam. No barking, growling, lunging, etc. Evidence of Cruelty seen -No Evidence of Trauma seen -No Objective T = P =90 bpm R =eup BCS 5/9 EENT: Eyes clear, mild wax AU, no nasal or ocular discharge noted Oral Exam: 1/4 tartar PLN: No enlargements noted H/L: NSR, NMA, CRT < 2, Lungs clear, eupnic ABD: Non painful, no masses palpated U/G: F/I, no obvious spay scar or tattoo MSI: Ambulatory x 4, skin free of parasites, no masses noted, healthy hair coat CNS: Mentation appropriate - no signs of neurologic abnormalities Rectal: Clean externally Assessment: Apparently healthy Prognosis: Good Plan: No tx needed at this time SURGERY: Okay for surgery 6/21/2019 S: Alert in kennel, barking at the front O: Hoarse coughing, moderate mucopurulent nasal discharge A: CIRDC P: Move to isolation -Swab for resp PCR testing -Doxycycline 350 mg PO SID x14 days -Enrofloxacin 340 mg PO SID x14 days -Cerenia 60 mg PO SID x4 days 1088 *** TO FOSTER OR ADOPT *** LINDA IS RESCUE ONLY. You must fill out applications with New Hope Rescues to foster or adopt her. She cannot be reserved online at the ACC ARL, nor can she be direct adopted at the shelter. PLEASE HURRY AND MESSAGE OUR PAGE FOR ASSISTANCE! HOW TO RESERVE A “TO BE KILLED” DOG ONLINE (only for those who can get to the shelter IN PERSON to complete the adoption process, and only for the dogs on the list NOT marked New Hope Rescue Only). Follow our Step by Step directions below! *PLEASE NOTE – YOU MUST USE A PC OR TABLET – PHONE RESERVES WILL NOT WORK! ** STEP 1: CLICK ON THIS RESERVE LINK: https://newhope.shelterbuddy.com/Animal/List Step 2: Go to the red menu button on the top right corner, click register and fill in your info. Step 3: Go to your email and verify account \ Step 4: Go back to the website, click the menu button and view available dogs Step 5: Scroll to the animal you are interested and click reserve STEP 6 ( MOST IMPORTANT STEP ): GO TO THE MENU AGAIN AND VIEW YOUR CART. THE ANIMAL SHOULD NOW BE IN YOUR CART! Step 7: Fill in your credit card info and complete transaction HOW TO FOSTER OR ADOPT IF YOU *CANNOT* GET TO THE SHELTER IN PERSON, OR IF THE DOG IS NEW HOPE RESCUE ONLY! You must live within 3 – 4 hours of NY, NJ, PA, CT, RI, DE, MD, MA, NH, VT, ME or Norther VA. Please PM our page for assistance. You will need to fill out applications with a New Hope Rescue Partner to foster or adopt a dog on the To Be Killed list, including those labelled Rescue Only. Hurry please, time is short, and the Rescues need time to process the applications. Shelter contact information Phone number (212) 788-4000 Email [email protected] Shelter Addresses: Brooklyn Shelter: 2336 Linden Boulevard Brooklyn, NY 11208 Manhattan Shelter: 326 East 110 St. New York, NY 10029 Staten Island Shelter: 3139 Veterans Road West Staten Island, NY 10309 *** NEW NYC ACC RATING SYSTEM *** Level 1 Dogs with Level 1 determinations are suitable for the majority of homes. These dogs are not displaying concerning behaviors in shelter, and the owner surrender profile (where available) is positive. Level 2 Dogs with Level 2 determinations will be suitable for adopters with some previous dog experience. They will have displayed behavior in the shelter (or have owner reported behavior) that requires some training, or is simply not suitable for an adopter with minimal experience. Level 3 Dogs with Level 3 determinations will need to go to homes with experienced adopters, and the ACC strongly suggest that the adopter have prior experience with the challenges described and/or an understanding of the challenge and how to manage it safely in a home environment.
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Thantophobia
Title: Thantophobia
Pairing:TogaFuka
Series: Dangan Ronpa (Main AU)
Characters: Toko Fukawa, Byakuya Togami, and a few others
Wordcount: 4,505
Warning:This is based on an AU, This is a TogaFuka fic, Pregnancy and child death warning (I mean, you don’t see the death, but-) This gets really depressing.
Author’s note: I started this September 14th 2016, it took me this long to finish. This is currently my longest fic.
Summary: I single-handedly ruin Fukawa’s life.
(Thantophobia: (n.) The fear of losing someone you love…)
(If there are any grammatical errors, I apologize)
April 30th-
“What?!” “I told you!” Fukawa yells, tears forming in her eyes. She knew that this subject was hard for the individual in front of her to grasp. She looks him dead in the eyes and howls out, “I’m pregnant, okay?!” The repeated sentence caused the man step back. He couldn’t process what she had said, at least, he couldn’t react to such news properly. His throat constricted on him, she could tell. “I’m sorry, Future Foundation building, not even for a day. It was safer to say it here. “I’m s-sorry..” She whimpered again, her arms drawn close to her chest, in her defensive self-hug, her eyes fixed on the floor in front of her. Togami finally came back to his senses, “How long has it been?” The recipient tightened her grip on her arms. “A-almost f-five months..” “How long have you known?” the grip tightened again. “About two and a-a half.”
For a pretty much the rest of the day, neither of them could speak, at least not to each other. Fukawa was afraid that he would hate her, he was afraid for her safety.
The two decided to meet up that night for a conversation in the main living area, namely, about their future. The time came, and Fukawa didn’t show up. Odd. Oh well, Togami would just have to find her himself. How hard could that be?
Quite hard, apparently.
He had eventually found her in her room, under the blankets, crying. He paced up to her, placing a hand on her trembling form. “Why are you crying?” She didn’t answer. “Is something actually bothering you, or is it something else? I can’t know unless you tell me. Please Fukawa.” The crying softened a bit, allowing words to emerge. “I-I know this isn’t what you-u w-wanted… I’m sorry..” His eyebrow rose a bit, “Why should you be sorry? I agreed to the conditions that can lead to a child, it would be considered foolish that I didn’t expect this to be an outcome.” The crying stopped. Fukawa slipped the blankets off her head, her eyes shone with tears, a scowl on her face. “I thought y-you hated the t-thought of having children!” Well, that was fast. Togami was taken aback by the sudden hostility. Was this mood swings, or her usual distrusting attitude? Who cares? He just had to calm her down.
“I, I guess I just wasn’t used to the idea. I-I mean, I guess, considering I don’t have to carry them, it won’t freak me out as much.” She responded with a glare. “That’s so encouraging.” Ok, it wasn’t mood swings. “Hey! I just said I’m ok with this!” he snapped, causing her to jolt up a bit. Her face changed to confused. “You’re, ok with the whole, you know, ‘me mothering your kid’ thing?” Togami let out a deep sigh. “I suppose so. Besides, I’ve had all day now to kind of accept our fate.” He sat down on the bed. “How about this; Just to make things easier for you, how about I stay here, in your room?” Fukawa moved most of the blankets off of her, her face still looked confused, but her eyes looked hopeful. “Y-you mean, for the night, or..” “If you want, I was thinking about moving in here with you.” Her face lit up. “Really?!” her voice squeaked with excitement. “Only if you want me to.” There was a pause. “W-why should it be on m-me?” “Well, you’re the mother, and it’s your mental health that’s at stake, so I figured you should call the shots here.” Fukawa loosened her shoulders, she appeared to be calm, even if she did tremble a bit. “A-alright, you can live here with me. H-however, if you get sick of me y-you can leave whenever you want.” Sounded like a fair deal.
“Alright.” Togami grinned as he held a hand out to her, she took it in a mediocre handshake. He looked down quickly, catching a glimpse of her rounded form, somehow he didn’t notice it before. Their child was in there. He let out another sigh. This was going to be an interesting experience.
June 17th-
Fukawa was sitting at the desk in her living quarters, a few half-blank pages were stacked evenly off to the side. She sat there, stressed out. Her fingers digging into her long, dark, frizzy hair. She had spent the last hour trying to get herself back into writing, but to no success. Suddenly she perked up, someone was coming down the hallway with food, she could smell it. As if her nose wasn’t good enough as it was, her pregnancy increased her sense of smell a bit too much. The mystery person passed by her door, and continued walking. Dammit.
A few moments later, there was a knock at her door. It wasn’t the person with the food, but at least this person could help her with ideas. “Come in!” The door opened, and in stepped Togami, closing it behind him. “Get anything yet?” Fukawa slumped her shoulders with her response, “No. Things just aren’t coming to me like they used to.” Togami walked over to her, a content grin on his face. “Maybe it’s because you’re so busy with other things, you can’t focus much on this.” She looked up at him, “What do you mean, busy?” He shrugged, “I mean, there’s The Tragedy, the fact that Munakata won’t make you an official member of Future Foundation, the fact that your body’s literally creating another human right now. There’s a few examples for you, I’m afraid.” She scowled, her jagged teeth exposed behind her lip. “Fine, I guess I am busy. It’s just… I can’t go on missions with anyone, I’m not even allowed to leave the building.” She lowered her eyes to her desk. “I just want to find a way to pass the time.”
Togami raised a hand to his chin, leaving it the for a bit, then placing it on his partner’s shoulder. “Maybe you need to have some time to relax while you think of ideas.” She put her hand on his, “I suppose. But, I-I’m not very good at relaxing anymore, I’m afraid.” She stood up “Do you have any ideas?”
“Could you stop that?” Fukawa started laughing. It was late at night, about eleven-thirty to midnight. Togami accidently got himself a little drunk when Juzo Sakakura offered him a few too many shots. Now he was nuzzling her like he was a cat, before resting his head on her stomach, alternating between talking to Fukawa, and her stomach. And his words sounded like he just woke up, and well, like he was drunk. “Hey, sweetie. Any idea what you’re gonna call this kid?” She figured he wouldn’t remember anything that would happen tonight, but answered anyway. “Well, I managed to think of two; Miyuki and Kenji.” “Those sound wonderful! I bet they’ll like those na-” The baby moved, getting their father in the cheek. The drunken Togami wasn’t pleased with that. “Hey, you watch your attitude you little bastard. I am your Byakuya Togami, and also your father, and you will treat me with respe-” They moved again. “That’s it, your grounded.” “B-Byakuya” The mother could barely speak through her laughter. “Byakuya, they won’t even be born for another four months or so.” Togami shifted his head to look at her. “Well that’s tough luck, luck for them, because I’m grounding them.” He raised a hand in the air, “As my fist act as a dad, I ground my kid for hitting me, twice.” He lowered his arm. Fukawa giggled as she placed a hand on his head, stroking his hair. “Maybe we should wait a while before grounding them?” The drunk man pouted in response. “Fine.” He poked her stomach in a somewhat disgruntled fashion. “You hear that? You’re getting off easy. Not next time. Next time I’ll really ground you.”
For the rest of the night, things were somewhat joyful between these two, despite one being drunk, the two hoped things could stay that way.
July 25th-
Fukawa lay in bed with a nagging thought. She wanted to go for a walk. It didn’t help that it was late, and the Future Foundation forbid anyone from leaving, for their own safety. But she wanted to go out. Well, Togami was asleep, he couldn’t stop her. She lifted herself up, managing to somehow get herself out of bed without any help. Step one was complete. Now she had to get out. Their room was on ground level, she just had to sneak out the window. She put on her shoes on, with some difficulty. Of course. And proceeded toward one of the windows, making sure that she wouldn’t wake her partner up. Thank god Togami’s usually a heavy sleeper. Using a good deal of her strength, she managed to get the window open, letting a cool breeze into the room. Fukawa looked back. He was still asleep. With that confirmation, she slipped outside.
It was an abnormally clear night, stars were faintly visible past thin, reddish clouds, a nice, cool breeze, perfect for a walk. Munakata was going to be so mad if he found out that one of the ‘weakest inhabitants there’ snuck out for a couple hours. Roughly twenty minutes passed, when a faint sound was heard in the distance. And of course she went toward it.
There was a group of people having a stand-off. All of them with firearms. And one just happened to notice a strange woman in a nightgown roughly fifteen feet away. Her throat prickled. First it was one, then they all noticed. The needles in her throat made it hard to breathe. One fired. Missed, thank god. But it was enough for her adrenaline to kick in. She ran, some pursued. Oh god did she run. Even with part of her body weighing her down, she did not stop. One man fired, nearly hit her shoulder, her foot caught on a piece of scrap metal, she lurched forward. Instinctively, she wrapped her arms around her stomach, as she hit the ground.
She lay on her side. Refusing to move. The pursuers stopped running, they assumed that they had killed her, and eventually left. Upon hearing the vanishing of footsteps, Fukawa tightened the grip on herself, relieved. “Ich hab ‘dich.” She whispered to herself continuously, a faint stirring inside her caught her attention. A sigh of relief exits her lungs. “I’ve got you.”
September 2nd-
“What?” “I told you.” Fukawa looked up at her partner as he repeated himself. “Genna and I are assigned to head to Towa City tomorrow, to retrieve the missing persons held captive over there, as well as the last two member of Despair.” Togami watched the once-slender young lady’s expression change from confused, to determined. “I’m going with you.” Why did this surprise him? “You can’t. You’re not allowed.” He watched saw the frustration form on her face, “Why not?” “Have you forgotten?” sarcasm dripped from his words as he tapped a finger on her side “It’s near impossible to miss at this point.” Fukawa scoffed at his remarks, “Like that’s going to stop me from going.” “Not unless you sneak into the helicopter with us.”
*The following day~*
Well, stowing away in the helicopter was a lot easier in Fukawa’s head. It’s not like there was something limiting her from bending forward, oh wait, there was. At least no one knew she was there. Of course, getting out of her position was harder than getting in. She didn’t have to worry about someone hearing her while she was sneaking in. Well, everyone else had exited the helicopter, she might as well follow. She wrapped her shawl tighter around herself as she exited. Genna noticed her first, of course. “Toko?! What are you doing here?!” “Same reason as you.” Was the reply. With that at least half of the employees present attempted to keep Fukawa from progressing. Somehow, none of them were successful. “I’m going with you. Whether you like it, or not.” Roughly an hour of debating passed, before the employees reluctantly let Fukawa go with them. Into the city. Right into a riot.
September 24th-
She was lying on a hospital bed, breathing heavily, an acidic feeling in her torso. A strange relief flowed through her chest, whatever hell just happened was over, but her form was still sore from it all. Oh well. She forced herself to sit up, her arms shaking in the process. A doctor walked over to her, a concerned look on their face. “W-well, how?.. Where are they?” Fukawa’s voice shook as she asked, hoping for the best. The doctor’s gaze shifted, “Well, we feel that it’s best if you didn’t see.” “What?” urgency lined the young woman’s voice, “Is there something wrong with them?!” “Not how you would expect it to be” the doctor’s voice was also lined with such urgency. Fukawa started to shift her position “Let me see.” “Miss, I believe it’s in our best interest-“ “Let me see!” with that, she forced herself out of the bed, staggering over to the doctor, no sign of giving up until she got her answer.”TELL ME! Tell me why I can’t see my own-“ “Miss, your son is dead!” That was it. Those words broke into Fukawa’s heart more than anything Junko could have ever said. “What?...” The doctor shook their head in response, “He seems to have suffered from a head injury in development.” The news turned the young mother’s eyes dark, tears beginning to form. She sank to the floor. Everything went numb. That was it. Her son was dead. “Get my sister, she’s in the waiting area…” her voice was dull, and broken. The doctor nodded and left. For a few moments, Fukawa was left alone with her thoughts. ‘He’s gone. What was the injury? Oh yes, a head injury. When? Right, it was in deveopme-‘ It clicked. Head injury in development. When she fell in July. ‘July would be seven months. That’s when his movement stopped. I thought lack of movement was normal? It is, that’s why you didn’t notice.’ The world around her stopped as it all tore at her throat. Her son was dead. And it was her fault.
December 3rd-
“Hey Fukawa.” A tired girl, around the age of nine poked the cheek of an older lady, who was asleep in the girl’s room, she succeeded in waking the exe novelist. “Mhm…What is it Monaka?” The little girl gently placed one hand on the young woman’s stomach, looking into her eyes. “What are you going to tell Byakuya, about him?” The grey-eyed woman lowered her eyes. She has to tell him, as much as she doesn’t want to. “I, I’ll tell him everything I know. That’s all I can do.” Monaka rolled onto her back, both arms in the air. “Say I was Byakuya, what would you say?” the woman pondered for a moment, “Well, I’d probably start with me telling him that I missed him.” “Yeah. After a big hug, maybe. And some ‘how have you been?’ exchanges. Then what would you do?” Another moment passed. “Well, I’d only tell him if he asked.” “Alright, then say he asked where the baby is, what would you say?” The child’s question was followed by a long pause. “I’d say; There was an incident at the hospital, and that Kenji didn’t…” She stopped. “Okay… Let’s not rehearse that question.” Monaka stated. “You can save that for when this despair fest ends, and we let him free.” Fukawa could only smile at this child’s surprising amount of optimism about the situation. “All right, I’ll tell him then.”
December 12th-
Fukawa and Togami reunited with could be called ‘and awkward hug’. They kind of stood there for a minute, before Togami gave an ‘ok’ for physical affection. Eventually, they were embracing each other, catching up on what the other one missed. All was going well, until Togami gently touched his partner’s stomach and asked, “How’s the…”
At that moment, something broke inside of her, all of the emotions she kept bottled inside for the last three months couldn’t be contained anymore. She began to cry. Togami held her, shocked, and confused. “What’s wrong? What happened? Toko!” She couldn’t reply very well, anything she tried to say, came out almost inaudible, and untranslatable. Until two words were identified, “Kenji….Gone….” The man’s eyes widened, “Kenji?” Urgency lined that word as he frantically asked again. “What happened to him?! What do you mean he’s gone?! I need to know!” The shuddering, dark-haired figure tried her words again, but slower, “S-something h-h-happened at the hospital, the d-doctor said h-he had a skull injury, h-he wasn’t fully devel,oped. I-I-I was the o-o-ne who gave h-him..” She suppressed her tears just long enough to shorten her story, “Kenji’s gone. I killed him by accident.” She felt Togami tighten his grip on her, his head on her shoulder. “I’m sorry…” she whimpered as she began to hear his breath quicken, and then a strange sound emanated from.. was he crying? She quickly pulled him closer. He was crying. “I-it’s alright! H-he didn’t feel anything! He’s okay! He’s safe! Don’t worry, Byakuya!” “It’s not alright! He was my son, too…” They stayed like this for a while, until Togami broke the silence. “Did you get to see him? Hold him?” “Yes.” “What did he look like?” She could only answer truthfully.
“He looked like you.”
September 21st-
Byakuya Togami was back in Towa City.
It was almost depressing seeing this place again. Oh well, it’s not like he was going to end up prisoner again. He was just sent on a simple in-and-out mission. Along with Asahina, Naegi, Munakata, and Chisa. Great.
The five passed through the ruined city with little error, with only a few small group mobs of adults left. The sun shone on broken glass, whether it was it was still attached to the ragged buildings, or scattered on the ground, sometimes stained with the pink of blood, both fresh and dried. “How did you survive this place?” Chisa piped up. “Togami-kun said he was imprisoned. So he probably was kept somewhere safer than the streets.” Came the reply from Asahina. The former scion didn’t answer. Asahina was right, but he didn’t feel like talking to anyone right now. They had somewhere to go.
Some time passed, until Naegi stopped, quickly pointing to a figure a distance away, catching the attention of the other four. The figure was a teenager. Shoulder-length dark brown hair, tanned skin, wearing a blue sweater with a pair of shorts. Suddenly the figure bolted away, with Asahina quickly in pursuit, leaving the others deciding to chase after the two.
A few moments passed as the group reached a slightly run-down building, with a group of children and adults interacting out front. Quickly they noticed Asahina with the figure in a headlock, playfully rustling their hair. They would later learn that the figure is her little brother Yuta, on lookout for the Future Foundation to arrive and retrieve them.
A ruckus started, full of friendly greetings, and playful forms of affection. Togami decided to hang back, away from the crowd. That wasn’t his style. “Togami?” came a semi-familiar voice. There, sitting apart from the crowd was Monaka, looking at him with those wide, surprisingly hopeful-looking eyes as she wheeled her way over to him. “It’s been a while, Monaka.” “Yeah, Fukawa really missed you.” “Has she?” the girl lowered her gaze from his face to her shoes. “She’s lost her motivation to do almost everything again.” She then looked back up. “I bet seeing you again will cheer her up!” An amused grin crossed the man’s face. “Really?” The child quickly nodded, and began to point at the building. “She’s probably still asleep on the couch.”
There she was, fast asleep on a couch in the building’s living quarters, her back facing him. Her long, long, dark hair had spilled off of the couch onto the floor. He paced over to her, placing a slender hand on her thin, almost boney shoulder, giving it a quick shake.
“Mmmph…” came a disgruntled huff from the sleeping woman. Togami shook her again, but a little stronger. “Gott verdammt. I swear Monaka, let me slee-!” She was now looking at the figure standing over her, someone she thought she’d never see again. “M-meine Geliebte..” Togami raised an eyebrow with a smirk, “Meine what?” Fukawa sat up, her shoulders raised in an almost defensive position. “G-Geliebte. You know… Amour, gaol, mohabbat, dragoste,-“ “Love?” his smirk was gone. She looked at him worried that she said something wrong. “Y-yes.” The man held his hand out, a bit of his smile came back. “You know you could have just left it in French, I’m not that good at understanding basically every other language you just said.” “The others were French, Gaelic, Hindi, and Romanian.” She took his hand, stood up, and quickly leapt at him, her arms around his neck. “I-i-it’s good t-to see you again, S-Schönheit.“ Togami didn’t really do a good job a reapproching the hug, but he hoped a gentle pat on the head could do it justice. „It’s good to see you again, too.“
„Let’s go home.“
September 24th-
Today would have been Kenji’s first birthday.
#Thantophobia#togafuka#byakuya togami#toko fukawa#fanfiction#pregnancy tw#child death tw#Cloud's Crap Literature#KoD's trash
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Teeth
Disclaimer: I do not own the legend of Zelda or any of its characters.
Teeth
“Hmph!” Daruk pulled the arrows logged in his rocky body. “The Yiga clan seems to be getting desperate.”
South Akkala plains is a quiet and relaxing place to travel through. Besides the dead bodies of the infamous Yiga clan that littered the ground that is. The champions of Hyrule cleaned themselves form the few wounds they received form the sudden ambush.
“Well we did just find the last Divine beast.” Revali dusted his feathers off.
“Tch! Fools.” Urbosa scoffed. Knocking off the arrows in her shield. “Thinking they could get the best of us…”
“Are um you, all alright?” Zelda asked with her allies. Her back turned to them. Or more specifically her back is turned form Link’s naked one.
Mipha’s hands glowed it’s healing light as the three holes in Link’s body closed. The hero of Hyrule had taken three arrows in the back for Zelda when the Yiga clan had ambushed them in the beginning of fight. Like the fighter Link is, the arrows did not slow him down. Even going as far as to take out one of the arrows and return it to the sender’s skull.
Much to Mipha’s aggravation.
As much as she loves the Hylian, his reckless behavior when guarding Zelda makes her worry. He always puts his whole self into anything and everything he does and that includes his duty in protecting the princess.
She can only heal him and scold him later.
Zelda, while unharmed could not hold back her embarrassment form seeing Link topless. Something Urbosa noticed with teasing smirk.
“Come now princess.��� The Gerudo snickered as she clapped the noble on her back. “You’ve always let him see your back. It’s only fair you get to see his right?”
Zelda turned beet red. “T-that’s neither here nor there!”
However, that didn’t stop the princess form glancing over to Link scared back.
“I-I am merely resp-WAIT!”
Suddenly Zelda is right next to Mipha observing Link’s back.
Mipha jumped at the princess kneeling down next to her. Her eyes practically glowing. “U-Um your highness- “
“This wounds are fantastic!” Zelda smiled in scientific wonder. Her eyes rushing over the large teeth mark on Link’s shoulder the claw marks that run down the center of his spine.
“H-Argh!?” Link tried to turn see what Zelda was doing. Only for the her push his head forward to get a better look at his back.
“Don’t move. Amazing. I’ve never seen zora bite marks this close up.” Zelda gazed in awe at the large teeth marks on Link’s shoulder. “This curvature of the fangs…yes these are female teeth marks! Did you get into a fight with a female Zora?”
Zelda asked Link excitedly. Her eyes shining. Gazing at the bit marks while Link sighed with his heads in his hands.
Urbosa peeked over her shoulder to see what has the little princess so excited. When she saw the red face of the Zora and the bite marks on Link’s shoulder. The Gerudo grew a teasing smile. She knows a love bite when she see’s one; being one to give out plenty herself.
“Hmm…” She never doses get the chance to tease the young swordsmen. Maybe poking fun at his love life could be her chance to finally get the stoic boy to blush.
“I’ve always wanted to study Zora’s biology. But I thought it would be rude to suddenly ask you Lady Mipha.” Zelda took out her sheikah slate to study Link’s bite marks more closely. “But I didn’t think Link would be such good case st-Oh! There are even claw marks too!”
Zelda pushed Link’s face right into the ground, bending his back even further to look at the scratch marks.
Urbosa walked up to them with a coy laugh. “You must have had a tough fight with that Zora huh? She must have kept cumming and cumming huh?”
Mipha gasped with massive red blush while Link wanted to desperately change the subject.
“She must have.” Zelda commented. “These claw marks suggest that your adversary must have given you quite the ride.”
“Geh!?” Link felt physically assaulted by the princess’s words.
“They’re so deep…”
“Ugk!?”
“And rough.”
“Ack!?”
“It must have been very hard for you.”
“Ugh….”
Link’s entire being looked defeated while Urbosa is trying her best not to fall over laughing. His only solace is that Zelda isn’t doing any of this on purpose like the Gerudo champion.
“Y-Yes. You must have had her s-screaming by the end of it. Right?” Urbosa chuckled.
“Judging from the scars Link may have been the one- “
“U-Um Princess!” Mipha gently coxed the princess away. “I um still need to heal Link’s wounds…”
“Oh!” Zelda turned red. Not even noticing she was touching Link throughout her intellectual tirade. “I-I am so sorry! Please, Mipha. Continue.”
Durak came to put stop to Ubrosa’s taunting and end Link’s and Mipha’s embarrassment. “Yes. We’ll leave you guys to it. Get the little guy patched up.”
The goron dragged the laughing Gerudo away while Link sighed in relief. Although it wasn’t from his healing wounds.
“I-I-I am sorry!” As soon as the other champions were out of ear shot, Mipha lot lose a waterfall of apologies. Her amber eyes squeezed tight as she spoke rapid fire, showing her big and sharp Zora fangs. “This is all my fault! If-if I wasn’t so persistent on you! Although to be honest, you were really good…B-But still if hadn’t asked you-and you were still sleeping too-and- “
Link’s hand hugged Mipha’s. Making her stop her babbling halt with his gentle blue eyes.
“I don’t mind.” He said with small smile.
And this time when the zora princess blushed it wasn’t form embarrassment, but the kind sentiment of her lover.
“Thank you…”
“THEY DID WHAT!?”
The yelling of princess Zelda made both them turn. Only to see Urbosa holding back a heavy fit of laughter. Daruk rubbing his temple in anger. Revali holding his belly chuckling. And then Zelda. Glaring at them with her cheeks puffed out cutely in anger.
-OOO-
“…And you should only do something like that until AFTER marriage! And doing it outside!? H-Ho-How indecent!! Dating or not, it is most un-becoming for the champions to be doing…THAT!!!”
Link and Mipha both sat on their knees, head bent low as a red faced Zelda scolded them for their…risqué actions.
Mipha looked positively mortified while Link just sighed.
Form stalwart guardian to a grounded ten-year-old.
“Did you even think about what would happen if you have children!? I am mean honestly! Your goal is to save Hyrule not fraternize with each other!!!”
Thus, is the life the Hylian champion.
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hey hello!! i’m jules and i’m supremely miserable rn bc i’ve been out of uni for the summer for two and a half weeks so far and legit none of my friends live nearby ( & i’m surrounded by snakes kill me pls ) but i’m pumped to be here and to tell you all about jill/jilly bean/a sweetheart™ !! so without further ado ( ?? ) here’s the important stuff but it’s still gonna be a wild ride:
she probably smells like watermelon and roses
.. make what you will of that statement bc idek what i’m trying to get across there lmao
a smol bean with a love for living things
a walking safety hazard whenever she indulges in a whole bottle of wine within a half hour
@ her heavyweight acquaintances: you’ve been warned
grew up the second of four children in an upper middle class family
not rly spoiled but she was privileged nonetheless
used said privilege to get wildly expensive garden supplies, medical journals, etc.. just a lot of good stuff in jill’s opinion, a wonderful investment indeed
can u hear me roll my eyes??
lOVES PLANTS
like she has two shelves and a window pane in her room cOVERED in cacti and herbs and other lil plants ( also has an unexplored kink for bonsai trees, she’s obsessed™ with them )
works as a florist to pay her bills/help her save up for med school and genuinely loves her job, loves the owner, just loves it all
pre-med graduate near the top of her class ( despite being a “c’s get degrees” kinda gal, she’s so in deep with bio clearly ) from ubc and is the happiest soul bc of it
she’s clever with constantly changing approaches to honesty, the irritability of a thirty something year old mother whose kids never stop, looking into the logical side of things a bit too much sometimes, and rly just the most intrusive and overly doting mom friend you’ll ever have
but she’s super easygoing when she’s not in mama bear mode, sincere, always smiling, and is generally comfortable with herself
the type to call herself out but at the same time have a hard time admitting she’s wrong about who won the 1977 stanley cup ??
always there if you need someone to talk to and only hopes it’s reciprocal
bc jill’s been through some shit these past couple of years hOLY
long story short, her mom, aunt and uncle ( by marriage ) were lowkey drug dealers working out of their family-owned antiques shop
no one in the family knew for the longest time, but the huge wads of cash that her mom claimed were from commissions for selling some of her paintings ( also, mama macrae’s an art hoe working in a small gallery ) didn’t always go unnoticed
this happened from when jill was seventeen to just before she turned twenty one
bc that’s when they got arrested for drug trafficking
they’re in the middle of the trial and jill p much ran away from the disaster that is her family rn
bc she can only take so much, she’s but a smol bean
paying for lawyers for his wife, helping to put a kid through uni and keeping up with expenses for basic needs for two other kids and himself had her dad struggling to make ends meet, so jill started working at the florist’s to pay for her education
she even moved into a smaller apartment because she still wasn’t making enough in her opinion and debated taking a couple of years off of school
currently lives off of your standard struggling student diet, subtract the occasional large gfangs bc she has to invest in her medical journals ofc
also watches over the munchkins and goes above and beyond for them bc she loves her family sm, even though this whole thing’s reaching a breaking point
saw that her dad couldn’t put much into their resps so she started adding some of her earnings to it bc she wants them to do well later on and every cent counts ??
she’s the apothecary for a reason, she’s just really selfless for the people she cherishes
so she’s making the most of the vacation here bc she hasn’t gotten a real break from everything and just wants to be pampered for once
last couples of quick facts
loves memes but also fucking hates memes
send her kermit memes and she’ll prob go on a tirade js
would die for sarah reese, aka probably the only tv doc that foreshadows her future as a med student lmao
pasta is her fave
like make her a pasta dish on the second date and she’ll contemplate marrying you then and there
prob the only adult that can still stomach cotton candy, also prob the only person that can eat peeps without complaining about them being death via sugar
caffeine hoe
art hoe
science hoe
a hoe of all trades tbh
doesn’t understand the hype behind some viral songs
doesn’t understand the hype behind most things
ok this got hella long so in conclusion,
protect her
don’t tread lightly, but also don’t break her spine pls
that.. was a mess, but that’s basically it! i can’t wait to rp with you guys and if you’d like to plot, just hmu!!
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92 Truths
I’M SO MAD I WANTED TO BE THE DOUBLE TAGGER BUT @mellomadness BEAT ME TO IT?????? I was originally tagged by @thewayhistoryiswritten. They tagged the whole fam so now I am gonna just sneak in here and be the TRIPPLE TAGGER B)
This one is really long?? So if you’re not about people oversharing on the internet then just skip down using “J” or blacklist long post, cause that’s what I’ll tag this as :)
(I would put a read more but half the people who tagged me use mobile and those don’t show up on mobile so...my apologies!)
Anyway let’s get to it, shall we?
LAST…
[1] drink: hot chocolate. for those keeping up with my roll up the rim #struggles, 15/15 have NOT won.
[2] phone call: Richard, my lovely bf who couldn’t remember the cereal my sister wanted
[3] text message: my sister who has no idea what food I have at home and is staying until Sunday and needs to eat
[4] song you listened to: One of the songs off the Steven Universe music playlist I have on soundcloud
[5] time you cried: Watching Moana last week it just gets me EVERY TIME the powerful I AM MOANA!!!!! I JUST YES. YES YOU ARE. YOU ARE AND I AM A WRECK
HAVE YOU EVER…
[6] dated someone twice: Nope
[7] been cheated on: In a way yes but also no.
[8] kissed someone and regretted it: Nope
[9] lost someone special: Yes.
[10] been depressed: low key all of last year? it was a struggle. and not like diagnosed depressed just...feeling sad ALL the TIME and WORTHLESS and people would tell me you’re great and I just wouldn’t believe them b/c it didn’t feel like I was great at all. I couldn’t even write about my shitty frosty children I just....couldn’t. I couldn’t do anything but think about how shitty things were going and how much I wanted to sleep and sleep and sleep and forget about life
[11] gotten drunk and thrown up: I have never gotten drunk to the point of throw up but hey, tomorrow is paddy’s day and my sister wants me to get “turnt” and “wasted” so we’ll see if I go over my comfortable drunk limit of 5 alcohols. Will keep you posted!
LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS:
[12] Blue
[13] Light blue
[14] Orange (Were you expecting more blue?? Hehe)
IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU…
[15] made new friends: Yes!
[16] fallen out of love: No, I’ve just made my relationship STRONGER
[17] laughed until you cried: Oh my god yes I live in a house with 3 other immature young adults who are stressed to the max you would be surprISED how often one of us laughing until we cry happens
[18] found out someone was talking about you: Not in bad ways!
[19] met someone who changed you: I don’t think so, though my current friends may have effected my humour just a tad ;)
[20] found out who your true friends are: Yeah, actually! A lot of realizations happened this year let me tell you *side eyes my shitty pal who makes things about herself constantly*
[21] kissed someone on your facebook list: I mean Richard is my facebook friend so...yes? We’ve been dating for 5 years though so idk how much that counts?? Cause he’s my SO???
GENERAL…
[22] how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: All of them I know well enough, I don’t add total strangers
[23] do you have any pets: My cat! Cinnamon! He’s so cute and such an affectionate lil bud for being a stray a year ago like what a cat I love him s o m u c h he’s so sILLY
[24] do you want to change your name: I love my name very much. It can be spunky (Dani), elegant (Ella), and a mix of them both (Daniella!)
[25] what did you do for your last birthday: I turned 21 and...I actually can’t recall?? I think Richard and I went out to dinner and OH NOW I REMEMBER!
We went to the Works and he surprised me with all of my good friends being there and then we went home and he got me an ICE CREAM CAKE and my housemates put my gifts in a suitcase b/c we had no wrapping stuffs welcome to Student Life my guys
[26] what time did you wake up: At 7AM today b/c I had an 8:30
[27] what were you doing at midnight last night: I was messaging Ana bean and making my bed because my sister wanted to sleep and my sheets had just finished washing
[28] name something you cannot wait for: Summer! I have a job, I’m staying in Kingston, I’M GONNA PLANT SHIT!!!! IT’S gonna be gr8!!
[29] when was the last time you saw your mother: In February for reading week!
[30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: I wish my parents hadn't struggled so much when I was younger, b/c then I would have had decent RESP’s and wouldn’t owe the government so much money for school Dx
[31] what are you listening to right now: The chatter of nearby people eating lunch (I forgot my headphones today I’m real upset)
[32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: You know, I see soo many people in one shift that one of them was probably named Tom tbh
[33] something that is getting on your nerves: FIFTEEN (15) ROLL UP THE RIM TO WIN CUPS AND NOT A SINGLE WIN. EVERYONE I KNOW HAS WON SOMETHING BUT NOT ME I AM BITTER AF THIS HAS BEEN THE WORST YEAR FOR ME FOR ROLL UP THE RIM
[34] most visited website: this blue hellhole
[35] elementary: St Herbert down the street from home. Everyone made fun of it and called it St Hubert’s, like the chicken place?? It bugged me as a kid now I’m like lmao yeah too bad they don’t have good chicken there
[36] high school: St Joe’s near my house! Commonly known as St Joe’s Hoes b/c there was a prostitute ring in the bathrooms in the 90s apparently??? And also everyone wore their kilts really high up. Those got banned. I was bitter I loved the kilt it was very warm
[37] college: Queen’s U!
[38] hair colour: It is Chestnut brown, according to Laurentian pencil crayons (it’s dark brown enough that my boyfriend thought it was black for the first year and a half we knew each other hahaha)
[39] long or short hair: I like it longer because then I can put it up a lot?? Though mid-length is usually my go to
[40] do you have a crush on someone: Does my boyfriend count. B/c if so then hecka yes
[41] what do you like about yourself?: My eyebrows SLAY. I like that I have managed to build up my patience so much. I like that I’m super creative and helpful and I like that I try to be as supportive as possible and usually pals are like ye u are supportive which does me a GOOD right in the heart!! I am being a HELP!!
[42] piercings: just my ears!! i’ve always wanted a nose piercing ha but I wouldn’t go through with it, my pain tolerance is exactly 0
[43] blood type: No idea!
[44] nickname: Dani
[45] relationship status: In a relationship with the most WONDERFUL FLUFF EVER Richard is really gr8 okay I could talk about him for days what a guy
[46] zodiac sign: Libra
[47] pronouns: She/her
[48] fav tv show: Steven Universe
[49] tattoos: none. if I got one it would be a shooting star somewhere inconspicuous
[50] right or left handed: right handed! for most things. I do use my left hand for odd things, like using a fork w/ a knife
FIRST… [51] surgery: wisdom teeth when I get them out this summer
[52] piercing: My ears when I was 2 months old or so
[53] best friend: PLEASE DO NOT AS ME THIS I HAVE MANY MANY BIFFERS (Richard, AJ, Ana, Jess, Athena...)
[54] sport: skiing
[55] vacation: Mexico when I was 7! Maybe younger, I can’t recall.
[56] pair of trainers: I just have converse?? Do they count??
RIGHT NOW…
[57] eating: Timbits
[58] drinking: Just finished a hot chocolate
[59] i’m about to: Finish a seminar response and then scream internally until I can go home
[60] listening to: People talking, still (there’s a lot of repeat questions here)
[61] waiting for: Class time
[62] want: A nap or two, a raise at work
[63] get married: One of these days! I keep asking Richard if we can just go to the courthouse and ELOPE but he keeps saying “yes let’s do that before we get married just go to a courthouse and wait on the big fancy ceremony until we can afford it!! He’s very set on being able to have a place for ourselves and such before hand which I agree with. But I still really wanna run to the courthouse one day and just fucking do it man)
[64] career: a writer with fame to rival that of J.K. Rowling, for instance, or the archaeologist who discovers Atlantis!
WHICH IS BETTER… [65] hugs or kisses: Hugs! I’m a really cuddly fuck but I love giving Richard kisses ALL OVER HIS FACE he gets soo happy!!
[66] lips or eyes: Eyes
[67] shorter or taller: Taller so I look cute when I attempt to be the big spoon, and so I can fit under the chin of my SO for MAXIMUM HUG
[68] older or younger: Older (irony b/c Richard is exactly 9 months older than me)
[70] nice arms or nice stomach: Both? Both. Both is good.
[71] sensitive or loud: Both? Both. Both is good.
[72] hook up or relationship: Relationship b/c I am not into the sex thing that much, occasionally yes but also not with a stranger?? I don;t look at someone like “I wanna tap that” usually my thought is “They’re pretty” or “I love their jacket” or “HOW DID THEY EYELINER???? THAT GOOD???” (Like ANA’S EYELINER OMG YOU ARE A MASTER AT THE EYELINER ANA PLEASE TEACH ME UR WAYS).
The only instance of “I wanna tap that” occurs like once in a full moon or two when I stare at Richard a v long time and thing HE IS SO WONDERFUL AND LOVELY I LOVE HIM LET’S GO RIGHT NOW INTO THE BED (TMI alert my guys, haha whoops)
[73] troublemaker or hesitant: Hesitant, though I can be a shit disturber, ask AJ. And Ana. And my other housemates, especially Richard. I can be a nuisance and have been confirmed to be an occasional menace >:)
HAVE YOU EVER… [74] kissed a stranger? Nope
[75] drank hard liquor? It depends on your definition? Sometimes I have a liqueur with my Dad but idk if it counts as hard liquor, it’s usually a Bailey’s
[76] lost glasses/contact lenses? ASK AJ I CONSTANTLY CANNOT FIND MY GLASSES B/C I CAN EVER REMEMBER WHERE I LEFT THEM
[77] turned someone down: In the most passive way possible. Fun fact: I once “friend-zoned” Richard, ha
[78] sex on first date? Heck no, I gotta know a guy or gal REALLY WELL before being like YES LET US ENGAGE IN COITUS, That is something I share with someone I trust fully and completely, not random people I meet on the first date (do people actually do that??)
[79] broken someone’s heart? Probably?? I dunno
[80] had your own heart broken? Omg yes when I was a lil pre-high schooler, dear me
[81] been arrested? HA no
[82] cried when someone died? Heck yes! real people, fictional characters...I’m a mess
[83] fallen for a friend: Every crush I have ever had began with a friendship so yes
DO YOU BELIEVE IN… [84] yourself? Usually, yes!! I had a bad bout of thinking nothing would turn out right the past year but I’m back in the swing of thinking “It’ll be okay, you can do it”
[85] miracles? I think yes
[86] love at first sight? Love at first sight is a MYTH. Love takes time, patience. Love takes getting to know someone really well and knowing how you work with them and how they work with you. Love takes a lot and if love at first sight is a thing, it’s more like the IDEA of a person, not who they really really are.
[87] santa claus? For real, yes, I actually do b/c when I had lost my belief already, there was one year where my siblings (who had been naughty) weren’t on the christmas party lists at my parents work for gifts, and I was. So yeah. I have a solid belief in Santa make fun all you want idgaf
[89] angels? Very much so. Ethereal angels and angels here I meet that have a profound impact on my life
OTHER… [90] current best friend’s name: I HAVE MANY but in no order, Richard, AJ, Jess, Ana, Athena...
[91] eye colour: Brown
[92] favourite movie: Moana, Grease, Atlantis, El Dorado. Those are my top four. I think.
GOOD GRIEF THIS WAS A LONG ONE I HOPE YOU ARE HAPPY AJ, YOU TOO MELLO. @divinitycas here is a third tag because yolo?? I guess??? Anyone else who likes to overshare on the internet please, be my guest!!! AND THEN TAG ME I LOVE LEARNING ABOUT OTHERS!!
#shush Dani#text#about me#long post#WHAT A CHALLENGE#THANKS AJ#I SAY#SARCASTICALLY#but actually thanks aj my friend#and mello#you two are quite the amigos#i just consider SO MANY PEOPLE BEST FRIENDS OK#there's also daryl and emma and rach#but they're like REALLY GOOD FRIENDS#not best friends bc a best friend for me is such a complex definition sorta???#IDK I AM WEIRD AND MY MUSCLES HURT FROM ALL THE SHOVELING
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Children, Cute, and Dogs: Balt 21860 1 years old, 55 lbs MEATBALL ALERT -Super handsome, young, stout, social, friendly – During intake was loose and tail waggy, sat on command, posed nicely for pics, jumped into his kennel willingly, friendly w/ the female greeter dog ove you with his tail **** TO BE KILLED – 3/7/2018 **** WHO DOESN’T LOVE A SOLID HUNK? Or just a 55 pound chunk of cuteness?! M’Baku is all the above and a bag of chips. Please watch his video and fall in love like we did. Happy, tail waggy and excited to be outside and in the company of awesome volunteers and cute girl pooches. M’Baku ain’t nobody’s stray, all gleaming in his chocolate coat and adorable white toes. M’Baku laid down on the floor and cried when his finder left, certain he had gotten lucky and found a new home, someone showing some concern for his well being, someone who seemed to care. We aren’t going to give up so easy though. Everyone deserves a second chance and M’Baku does too! The shelter is saying he’s about five or ten pounds overweight but some of us love a little extra to snuggle up to, or you can go ahead and whip M’Baku into shape with some nice walks, something even the lazy lounging dogs love. Found as a stray on the streets, let his former loser family’s loss be your gain. M’Baku’s a gem and he’s going to be awesome in a loving home with a good, experienced family. Please don’t overlook!!! M’BAKU@MANHATTAN ACC Hello, my name is M’Baku My animal id is #21860 I am a male brown dog at the Manhattan Animal Care Center The shelter thinks I am about 1 years old, 55 lbs Came in the shelter as a stray Feb. 28, 2018 Rescue Only M’Baku is at risk for behavioral reasons. M’Baku has a low threshold for arousal, and severe leash biting behavior and it is extremely difficult to divert his attention when this occurs. medically, M’Baku is a little overweight, needing to lose between 5 and 10 lbs, but presents as an otherwise healthy dog. My medical notes are… Weight: 55.8 lbs Vet Notes 4/03/2018 DVM Intake Exam Estimated age: Estimated 3-7 years based on overall impression Microchip noted on Intake? Scanned negative on intake – MC placed during exam History : Stray, found on the street, no health hx available Subjective: Excited, barks and jumps around. Observed Behavior – Lunges for the rope, chews on any leash he can reach. Once pt was leashed twice, we could reach towards him to muzzle him – and once pt was muzzled, he panted heavily but allowed all handling with no flinching away or signs of aggression. Evidence of Cruelty seen – None Evidence of Trauma seen – None Objective – BAR-H, MMs pink and moist, BCS 7/9 EENT: Eyes clear, ears clean, no nasal or ocular discharge noted Oral Exam: Clean incisors – couldn’t see other teeth PLN: No enlargements noted H/L: Difficult to auscult due to upper resp stertor. No sign of resp distress. ABD: Tense, non painful, no masses palpated U/G: Male intact, testicles S/S MSI: Skin thickened and slightly erythematous. No discrete lesions noted on feet, dorsum, neck. Ambulatory x 4, skin free of parasites, no masses noted. CNS: Mentation appropriate – no signs of neurologic abnormalities Rectal: Normal externally Assessment: Overweight Prognosis: Good Plan: Neuter. Recommend weight loss of 5-10 lbs. SURGERY: Okay for surgery 1088 Details on my behavior are… Behavior Condition: 2. Blue Behavior History Behavior Assessment Upon intake M’baku arrived with a muzzle. He allowed the counselor to remove his collar and muzzle. He had loose body and waggy tail. He sat on command and posed nicely for picture. He was fixated with the door when his finder left. He started to cry and then laid on the floor. He sat next to the admissions counselor. He pulled hard on the leash but slowed down when told to do so. He jumped into his kennel willingly. Basic Information:: M’baku is a brown and white large mixed dog. He arrived as a stray. Date of intake:: 2/28/2018 Spay/Neuter status:: No Means of surrender (length of time in previous home):: Stray Date of assessment:: 3/4/2018 Summary:: A handling assessment is not able to be preformed on M’Baku due to excessive leash biting. When on leash, M’Baku will consistently bite the leash and will not trade or relinquish it. When an attempt to preform a handling assessment was made, M’Baku would not relinquish, and therefore the assessment could not be continued. Summary (1):: 3/1: When introduced off leash to female dogs M’Baku greets politely by sniffing. He begins to hard bark at handlers without provocation, and head flips when his leash is picked up. At this time, it is recommended that M’Baku be given a period of decompression outside the shelter before immediate introductions to unfamiliar dogs. Future introductions should be conducted at a slow pace to dogs who are respectful and tolerant. Date of intake:: 2/28/2018 Summary:: M’Baku had a loose body and allowed handling. Date of initial:: 3/4/2018 Summary:: M’Baku was active, barking, and jumping around. ENERGY LEVEL:: We have no history on M’Baku so we cannot be certain of his behavior in a home environment. However, he is a young, enthusiastic, social dog who will need daily mental and physical activity to keep him engaged and exercised. We recommend long-lasting chews, food puzzles, and hide-and-seek games, in additional to physical exercise, to positively direct his energy and enthusiasm. IN SHELTER OBSERVATIONS:: When M’Baku first arrived, he displayed concerning behavior when his leash was picked up. After settling into the shelter, he continues to leash bite with high interest in the leash itself, with what appears to be soft body language. When handlers attempt to stop his leash biting by pulling the leash away, he continues to leash bite. When the leash is relinquished to him, he engages in it, exhibiting what seems like a self-soothing behavior. He allows petting from handlers, but continues to leash-bite when distracted or not engaged in an activity. After using the facilities and settling down, M’Baku stops leash biting, and allows more petting from handlers with a soft body. He also responds to the hand signals and cues for “Sit” and “Down”. BEHAVIOR DETERMINATION:: NEW HOPE ONLY Behavior Asilomar: TM – Treatable-Manageable Recommendations:: No children (under 13),Place with a New Hope partner Recommendations comments:: No children: Due to the low threshold for arousal M’Baku has displayed at the care center, we recommend an adult only home. Place with a New Hope partner: Due to the low threshold for arousal M’Baku has displayed at the care center, we recommend placement with a New Hope partner who can provide any necessary behavior modification (force-free, positive reinforcement-based) and re-evaluate behavior in a stable home environment before placement into a permanent home. Potential challenges: : Leash-biting,Low threshold for arousal Potential challenges comments:: Low threshold for arousal: M’Baku has displayed a low threshold for arousal at the care center, hard barking and head whipping at a handler and consistently leash biting. During one incident, he displayed a potential to tip over into aggression, when he began hard barking unprovoked at a handler. .) Immediate intervention and consultation with a qualified positive reinforcement, force-free behaviorist/professional trainer is strongly recommended to aid in addressing this issue to prevent further behavioral concerns that may appear in the future if not treated right away. We recommend only force-free, reward based training when introducing or exposing M’Baku to new and unfamiliar situations. Leash-biting: M’Baku is quick to grab the leash in his mouth. We recommend walking him with a toy to dissuade him from grabbing the leash. Positive reinforcement, force-free training is advised to teach him to focus on you rather than grabbing the leash. M’BAKU IS RESCUE ONLY…..TO SAVE THIS PUP YOU MUST FILL OUT APPLICATIONS WITH AT LEAST 3 NEW HOPE RESCUES. PLEASE HURRY!!! IF YOU CAN FOSTER OR ADOPT THIS PUP, PLEASE PM OUR PAGE FOR ASSISTANCE. WE CAN PROVIDE YOU WITH LINKS TO APPLICATIONS WITH NEW HOPE RESCUES WHO ARE CURRENTLY PULLING FROM THE NYC ACC. PLEASE SHARE THIS DOG FOR A HOME TO SAVE HIS LIFE. LIKE AND FOLLOW FOR NEW CONTENT EVERYDAY <3 for more visit: www.memelang.ml
#memes#funny#funnymemes#savage#savagememes#dopeaf#memesdaily#meme#funnyvideos#dankaf#dankmemes#goodmo
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update heyo
So its been forever since i did an update because its been a solid plus year since ive been active! hEY HELLO THERE
Few things.
1. Still Bisexual as Hell
2. Still Captain Swan trash, but since its ended essentially ive had to find a new ship to fill the hole, and for anyone that knows me you know I LOVEEEE TV ships but I hardly get attached in the same manner I did was CS.
3. HOWEVER I AM COMPLETE FITZSIMMONS TRASH. Literally real life goals.
4. I still dont care who U ship as long as your nice, you do you lovebug
5. I graduated w/ my BA. Im in my Masters atm, will be finished in 4 months
6. Currently doing therapy with cancer, stroke patients, and general bedside counseling.
7. I LOVE IT BUT im a bit broken
8. Been having really bad anxiety and depression this year which is an odd thing for many reasons.
9. i havent experienced it in years, and I WORK with people who are suffering w/ these things so there’s that internal dialogue of “am I a fraud or no”. But im learning that I can be dealing with things but still be helping people and at least now I have the coping strategies to start pushing my way out.
10. my mental health issues are strongly connected to me being ill. For anyone who doesn’t know ive been experiencing an array of symptoms for almost two years now, including but not limited to : constant respiratory problems, constant colds/coughts, waking up choking in the night, pins and needles, word confusion, massive fatigue and brain fog, exhaustion, weakness, shaking, tremors etc etc fuck fuck fuck haha. And up until a month ago i had no one to really listen to me. Every doctor thought it was stress, which Im very well aware I am experiencing but the stress feels very much like a result of being ill and not something that was present before hand. My blood results are always a little off and I ended up in the hospital because i fainted because my O2 was low, but it evened out w/ a breathing treatment. The ER doc thought it was a prolonged uper resp infection and gave me a shit ton of meds that didn’t work. And now Im in the midst of the worst sore throat known to man. I finally asked a DR friend at MY hospital to set up an appointment w/ her at her private practice and she found I was vitamin B12 deficient so im hoping my new vitamins will solve some of the issues. We will see.
11. I HATE THE PRESIDENT. He’s awful. Yes I really am one of those people that do not want you following me if you support the pool of trash that is Donald Trump.
12. ive said it before, and theres a story about it on a link on my page, but #METOO
13. Speaking of metoo, i told my dad about my experience which is a big thing for me seeing how its been almost 11 years.
13. My Birthday is tomorrow, big 24!
14. Ive gained a shit ton of weight back due to the massive amounts of steroid packs doctors have provided me w/ for my reoccuring colds/coughs/infections etc. So I really dont want to answer water fasting questions, as its a sore point. Thanks!
15. Im currently in Minnesota binge watching AoS/ Fitzsimmons videos and crying about how I have to wait a week.
16. My ask is still always open.
17. Im always here to Listen.
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Set In Darkness
Chapter: 34 Author name: ShannaraIsles Rating: M Warnings: Canon-typical threat and violence Summary: She’s a Modern Girl in Thedas, but it isn’t what she wanted. There’s a scary dose of reality as soon as she arrives. It isn’t her story. People get hurt here; people die here, and there’s no option to reload if you make a bad decision. So what’s stopping her from plunging head first into the Void at the drop of a hat?
Thoughtless
"Ah ... so this would be the clinic I've heard so much about. How quaint."
Rory snorted with laughter, not bothering to look up from where she and Evy were making the last of the clinic beds. She knew exactly who was speaking.
"Not too rustic for you, I hope?" she asked, tossing the empty pillowcase to Evy as she finished tucking the sheet and blanket securely. "How about the smell?"
"All part of your charm, I'm sure," Dorian commented from the consultation room beyond the ward. "Oh, you were talking about the clinic."
As Evy gasped in offense, Rory just laughed, straightening up to get her first proper look at her favorite characters. Debonair wasn't really a word that could be used to describe anything in Thedas, but it certainly described Dorian Pavus. Clean and dapper, he seemed exceedingly out of place amid the grime and simplicity of Haven.
"You must be the mage from Tevinter," she said in a welcoming tone, gesturing for him to come into the ward.
"Which would make you the singularly inoffensive healer Kaaras mentioned." He offered both her and Evy a florid bow. "Dorian of House Pavus, at your service. That rather delicious commander has denied me a place at the Herald's side until I am proven fit and healthy, and a touch more easily trustworthy."
"No one should trust a magister, even if you did save the Herald's life," Evy passed comment, her dark tone not quite overriding the Chantry-induced fear in her voice.
Dorian sighed at her assumption. "Not a magister, merely a mage."
"Same difference," Evy insisted, setting the pillow on the bed.
"Not in the Imperium, I assure you," the altus pointed out patiently.
"Well, I can see you two are going to get on like a house on fire," Rory said in amusement, glancing between them. "Evy, why don't you open the clinic for the afternoon? I'm sure I can handle Not-Magister Pavus here."
Frowning with disapproval, Evy took the suggestion with an attempt at not seeming eager. "I'll be just on the other side of this door," she said pointedly, more for Dorian's benefit than Rory's.
"I'll be fine," Rory promised her, managing not to smile until the door closed in the younger woman's wake.
"What wonderfully suspicious minds you southerners have," Dorian mused, contemplating the now closed door. "It's almost like being at home." His sharp gaze turned to Rory. "I take it I am to be medically assessed, yes? And you are?"
"I'm Rory," she introduced herself. "And yes, I should assess you. Not that I'm expecting to find you unfit."
"Mistress Rory, you flatter me," he declared in his cavalier way. "There are a few things I am uniquely unfit for."
"I can imagine," she chuckled, moving to take a seat at her desk. She pulled a fresh piece of parchment from the pile, loading her quill to write his name at the top, along with his birth-date, and the current date. Is it weird that I know he was born in 9:11 Dragon without needing to ask? "Do you have any existing injuries or illnesses I should know about?"
"Apart from my devastating good looks and understated charms, you mean?" he asked in that indefinably Dorian way of his. "I have nothing to report currently, aside from an intense dissatisfaction with the food here. I did suffer through a terrible bout of Nevarran 'flu a while ago."
"How long ago was that?" she queried, scribbling this down. She hoped he wasn't still carrying it - as it stood, she had no in-patients, and as the assault on the Breach loomed ever closer, she was hoping to keep it that way.
"Oh, twenty years, at least," he told her. "Long before I reached my inevitable prime. Where do you want me?"
She drew her eyes from the page. "If you could just ... Oh."
There he was - gorgeous, adorable Dorian Pavus - stark bollock naked in the middle of her ward. Hands on his hips, he was completely at home with his nudity, eyeing her sudden blush with an expectant expression. As if drawn by magic, her gaze drifted downward before she managed to look away. Well, that brings the total number of men's privates I've seen here to well over two hundred. And not one of them was Cullen's!
With her inner fangirl sobbing uncontrollably at the glorious perfection that was the Tevinter mage, Rory offered him a warm smile. "Very nice," she complimented as he flexed, aware he was trying to make her blush darker. "Now if you could put your pants back on and come over here, we can get you signed off for the commander."
"You southerners don't check for hernias, then?" he asked, reaching for his pants.
"We do, but not in the way you're obviously used to," she explained with a smile. "I have a different method that is just as effective, and doesn't require you to be completely starkers. You're not alone in stripping off, though. Pretty much everyone I've assessed has shown me everything they've got."
"Truly?" Dorian laughed, covering his lower half without even a hint of embarrassment. "How fascinating. I must admit to some curiosity as to where I fall on the scale."
"Top ten," she assured him impishly. "Easily."
"My dear girl, what a marvelous life you lead," he teased, moving to sit down with her. "Spoiled for choice."
"Oh, I've already made my choice," she chuckled, reaching for her very primitive stethoscope. "And it had nothing to do with any sneak previews."
"I believe I may have to have that story from you some time soon," Dorian warned. He'd clearly been through this kind of assessment before, sitting upright as she set about listening to his heart and lungs.
She didn't have the familiar accoutrements of modern medical science at her fingertips, but what she did have was enough to assess and diagnose, to a point. Her stethoscope was essentially just a smooth wooden tube attached to a wide sounding board, but it did the job she needed. Pulse and resps were easy to record without any equipment at all, and though she had nothing to record exact temperatures, she'd learned how to guesstimate them by the heat of a person's resting armpit. It wasn't glamorous, but it was useful, and she'd found that people like to talk to her as she worked, to distract themselves from the discomfort. That was how she knew everything that happened in Haven - on any given day, multiple people told her about everything from their differing perspectives.
"Well, I see no reason not to declare you fit," she told Dorian after about an hour of talking and prodding around, handing him his leather shirt to put back on. "I would avoid teasing the commander if you want to be declared trustworthy, though."
"You don't think he'll respond well to my irrepressible charisma?" Dorian asked her, apparently comfortable with teasing her, at any rate. Mind you, she had just inspected him from top to bottom.
"In a word? No." She chuckled lightly. "At least, not right now. He has a lot on his mind."
"Perhaps someone should offer to ease the burden of all those cares," the mages suggested thoughtfully. "Though I'm not sure he would respond well to my methods, if at all."
"I'd advise against it," Rory warned in amusement, however funny the thought of watching Cullen fielding Dorian in full flirt was.
"Indeed? Have I somehow missed the subtle signs that declare the man to be taken?" Those beautiful hazel-brown eyes of his met her gaze knowingly above a faint smirk.
"Even if I don't answer that, you're going to know what the answer is," she pointed out, quite pleased with herself for not laughing and blushing at the perceptive way he was looking at her.
"Ah, so he's yours, is he?" Dorian looked absolutely delighted with this information. "You and I simply must have a talk about his tension. Soon."
"I don't think -"
Any further response was interrupted by an exclamation of shock from the consultation room, the sound of Evy's protests, and the inner door bursting open to admit a fully-armed and -armored templar, who seemed to be expecting to find trouble. Behind him, Rory could see Evy hastily helping her patient cover her chest, trying to reassure her, and trouble was quite suddenly exactly what the templar found. She rose abruptly, her expression flat with fury.
"Get out." It wasn't a request; it wasn't even said in a particularly loud voice. Her tone was even, furious, and promised a world of pain if he didn't remove himself immediately.
"The commander said -"
"I don't give a flying fuck what the commander said," Rory snapped. "You have just interrupted two confidential consultations. Get. Out."
The templar hesitated, torn between obedience to his superior and obedience to a healer who looked as though she was about to lamp him for his unthinking impertinence. He opened his mouth, thought the better of talking back, and abruptly turned on his heel, marching out of the clinic and closing the door loudly behind himself. Rory made an attempt to school her expression, turning her attention to Evy and the now frightened elven woman her friend had been seeing.
"I am so terribly sorry about that," she apologized profusely. "Please be assured that it will not happen again. I will make certain of it." She glanced into the ward, raising an arm to gesture to her own patient. "Dorian, if you'd like to come through, please? We're just about done, anyway. Evy, bolt that door behind us so there are no more interruptions."
"What are you going to do?" Evy asked worriedly. Rory didn't often get this angry, but one thing guaranteed to flare her temper was a threat to her patients.
"I'm going to have a word with the commander," she told her friend in an ominous tone, ushering Dorian out into the village. She waited until she heard the bolt draw across, turning to the guard on duty, who just happened to be Calman. "No one goes through this door unless specifically invited by a healer or a nurse, is that clear?"
The formerly difficult guard nodded, his gaze flickering disapprovingly to the templar who had pushed past him in the first place. "Crystal clear, Rory."
Satisfied for now that her clinic was inviolate once again, Rory turned back to Dorian. "I really am dreadfully sorry for the interruption, Dorian," she apologized to him. "It's been a pleasure to meet you."
"Oh, and you, Mistress Rory," he countered, ever so slightly uneasy in the presence of the glowering templar. "However shall I fill my time before we have a chance to properly socialize?"
"I'd suggest the tavern," she recommended. "Introduce yourself to Varric, he's usually there this time of day."
"Then that is what I shall do." He bowed to her, ambling past to make his way toward the sound of Maryden's first ever rendition of Sera Was Never.
Rory rounded on the templar who had violated her patients' privacy. "What were you thinking?" she demanded heatedly. "How dare you simply burst in without so much as knocking first? Didn't your mother teach you any manners?"
The templar - whose name was Harper, she remembered suddenly - fidgeted under her furious questions. "The commander ordered me to make sure you weren't in any trouble with the magister," he defended himself. "Said to check no matter who tried to stop me."
"Did he really." Lyrium-induced paranoia strikes again. "If this ever happens again, Ser Harper, you will knock, and you will wait to be invited inside. And if you ever force your way into my clinic again without a damned good reason, I will make sure that the next time you're in there with your pants around your ankles, the entire village gets a good look at you. Do you understand?"
Harper grimaced, but nodded. "Yes, Healer."
"Good. Now ... where is the commander?"
"In the Chantry, Healer," he told her. "Only he's not to be disturbed."
"What a shame." Rory's tone made it clear that she didn't care how busy Cullen was right now. "Go and find something to do that's quite a long way from here."
Harper gave her a grateful look and bolted for the gates. In her own turn, Rory stormed to the Chantry, pushing her way inside in the worst temper she'd had since landing in Thedas. She ignored the templars who tried to stop her at the door to the war room, forcing her way inside with such violence that the door slammed hard against the wall. Four faces turned to her in surprise, trained hands reaching for weapons before recognizing the unexpected intruder. Rylen, Brycen, and Lysette relaxed quickly, but Cullen didn't. He was the one who got the full force of Rory's angry glare.
"What is the one thing that I insist on for all my patients?" she demanded ferociously.
Cullen's jaw set, clearly taking offense at her tone. "This is a private discussion of sensitive issues," he began, but he didn't get any further.
"Which, evidently, you don't want interrupted," she snapped, laying her hands on her hips. "I could have sworn you just ordered someone not to afford me the same courtesy. You're many things, Cullen Rutherford, but I never thought you were a hypocrite."
His expression darkened as he held her glare. "Out, all of you," he ordered his senior captains. "Wait outside."
The trio hastily did as they were told, exiting the room with graceful aplomb. No one really wanted to be in the same room as that temper, and certainly not when it was about to clash head-on with the commander's. Cullen closed the door behind them, turning to scowl at Rory.
"Never speak to me like that in front of my people again," he warned in a dangerous tone.
"I will speak to you however I choose when you willfully disregard me, commander," she informed him, her voice tight with anger. "How dare you order anyone to burst into the clinic, especially when you know I'm seeing patients?"
"You were too long secluded with the magister," he told her coldly. "I was concerned for your safety."
"Oh, and I suppose as long as you feel better, the privacy and dignity of my patients, their trust in me ... that doesn't matter at all," Rory growled at him, her hand waving wildly in her agitation.
"It was just the Tevinter -"
"No! It's never just anyone!" she flared, aware that her voice was rising with impassioned rage. "You'd be outraged if you were the patient whose confidential examination was just interrupted on someone's orders, for no good reason. What the hell is wrong with you that you think doing something like this is okay?"
Cullen loomed over her, his handsome face set in stormy lines. "He's a Tevinter magister, probably a blood mage," he snarled back at her. "I will not have you putting yourself at such high risk!"
"So you wouldn't have done it if he'd been seen by Evy?" she demanded, shocked to see him hesitate. "And for your information, Dorian isn't a blood mage!"
"How can you possibly know that?" he questioned her heatedly.
"Blood mages have scars, he has none," she snapped back. "If you bothered to ask him, he'd probably show you how smooth his skin is! Honestly, what were you thinking?"
"I was thinking that I don't want to see the woman I love become a blood sacrifice!" he roared at her, anger overtaking sense for one crucial moment.
"Yeah? Well, I love you, too, but that doesn't mean you're not an arse!" she yelled back, both of them nose to nose and breathing hard as their decidedly unromantic declarations sank heavily into the sudden silence. At least they were reciprocated.
Cullen was the one to break that silence. "I apologize for my ill-considered actions," he said sternly, too angry with her behavior to say much more. "It will not happen again."
"I'm sorry I interrupted your conference and called you a hypocrite," Rory shot back, breathing hard through her still percolating temper.
He nodded in acknowledgement. "Is that all, Healer Rory?"
She hesitated, but she knew her temper was nowhere near settled enough for the conversation she now needed to have with him very soon. "That's all, Commander Cullen."
"Then, if you will excuse me, I have work to do," he said coolly, dismissing her. He half-turned back before she could leave, a flicker of something warm and hopeful in his expression. "Until tonight?"
Rory nodded slowly, feeling her anger beginning to ebb as something just as warm and hopeful flared in her chest. "Tonight," she agreed, turning to let herself out.
She caught a glimpse of the grin on Rylen's face as she passed her friend, aware of the varying levels of wide-eyed shock on the faces of others within the nave. Mother Giselle looked more impressed than anything; Minaeve's mouth was open; Josephine was peering out through her office door with silent astonishment. So much for private. It seemed as though everyone had heard that little ... discussion. And their heated exchange hadn't even begun to explain why he'd had Dorian's examination interrupted in the first place. She very much doubted it was really because Cullen suspected the altus of being a maleficar. And I may have overreacted a little, she admitted shamefully to herself, welcoming the icy breeze that greeted her as she left the Chantry building.
Breathing slowly, she let herself calm down as his unthinking roar filled her mind. The woman I love ... he loves me. Oh, please, let this not be a coma-dream.
#set in darkness#multi-chapter fic#mgit#dragon age inquisition#dragon age fanfiction#dai fanfic#cullen rutherford/original female character#cullen rutherford/rory allen#rory allen#evy trevelyan#dorian pavus#cullen rutherford#jealousy#insecurity#angst#arguments#declarations of love#not exactly romantic
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