#(': also I've just been having not great luck with searching for a job and working at a deli is...horribly exhausting and also low paying

[dourpeep]

anxious b/c a potential opportunity has come up and I always get very anxious about them aishdfoieh

[weirdoonthebus]

Help me avoid becoming homeless

Hi, I'm a very mentally ill trans woman who is about to get kicked out of their apartment. I have no irl support network, nowhere else I can crash, I will be out on the streets. I have to come up with the rest of the rent in about 10 days (they are not giving me till the 1st). In total I need about $800 to stay here, which I know is a lot to ask and I don't feel great about it but I'm fully out of options. I've been doing sex work for months and searching everyday for a stable job but it's not working. Countless job applications and interviews and I'm still out of luck. I really don't know what else to do anymore and I'm scared. If anyone can help out, even just a little, it would mean a lot. Thank you.

PayPal

CashApp

I also have a Bandcamp and Patreon where you can purchase music and sample packs if you prefer.

[callalillywrites]

Their Sweet Omega

So, this idea came expressly from this imagining and I'll admit I got a bit carried away by the idea. I really hope @thezombieprostitute doesn't mind that I took this idea and ran with it.

Part 2 / Series Masterlist

Relationship: Alpha!Jake Jensen / Beta!Pre-Serum!Steve Rogers / Omega!Reader

Rating: Pure Fluff

Word Count: ~2100

Summary: Jake and Steve have been searching for an Omega to call their own. Their luck hasn't been all that great until an Omega literally lands in their laps one day.

A/N: I have a lot more I want to add to this little universe, but I'll see how it goes I guess with everything else I've got going on at this point. I do hope you enjoy this little bit of fluff as it's my first ever A/B/O I've ever written. It's proofread but all mistakes are my own.

I also do not give permission for my work to be copied or posted on other sites or fed into an AI machine.

*****

Jake Jensen isn’t your typical Alpha, but he’s a good one according to Steve Rogers, his Beta. Jake isn’t built like other Alphas though he does have an understated strength to him that many overlook, but it’s his gentleness and anti-bullying policies that really made it easy for Steve to align himself and fall in love with Jake.

Steve isn’t always the greatest Beta. He can be headstrong and maybe a little bit reckless especially when he’s seeing something going down that shouldn’t.

He also doesn’t have the greatest health. He’s not nearly as sickly as he might’ve been in, say, the 1930s, but he’s still considered not the healthiest by modern standards, either. He’s also rather short compared to other guys his age. Jake stands about a foot taller than Steve on a good day, even more when chronic illness slumps Steve’s shoulders and keeps him in bed.

Because of his poorer health, Steve has a harder time holding down any type of job for long. That doesn’t bug Jake though as he makes more than enough with his cyber security job and his freelancing software programming gigs on the side.

In fact, he encourages Steve to build up his painting and drawing hobbies, buying Steve the best supplies and even building him a website and social media following. Steve does quite well with it, too, since it allows him to work at his own pace while still feeling like he’s contributing to the household as well.

The only thing really missing in their lives is an Omega they can call their own. It’s not like they haven’t been looking, either, but the few Omegas they had been interested in had left them wanting. They’d either been disappointed that Jake wasn’t ‘Alpha’ enough for them or they didn’t really see Steve as anything more than an attachment of Jake. They refused to give up hope though.

Neither really counted on how one lucky Wednesday morning would change everything for them.

Jake decides to treat Steve to a whole day of pampering and quality time together after the past few busier weeks they’d been enduring. Jake had just finished a major project at work while Steve had finished one of his biggest commissions to date. It was a time to celebrate, relax, and enjoy each other’s company.

It’s why they ended up at the cute little café near their place. Jake stands in line to place their orders while Steve claims a small table and chairs near the windows. Steve likes to people watch and draw whatever he sees, always carrying a small sketchbook for such an occasion everywhere he goes.

Both notice the cute Omega at the front of the line. How could they not? The sweet Omega smells like cinnamon rolls and vanilla. It’s a heady concoction, but they also notice that she’s getting plenty of other attention from other Alphas that she’d probably prefer over Jake anyway. She even seems to be chatting with one of said Alphas while she waited for her order to finish prep.

That changes when her order is called.

When she bids the Alpha a good day, the Alpha bumps her and sends her scrambling and careening into the table where Steve sat. Her drink spills all down her best business outfit while she lands into Steve’s lap. Her impact on his unsuspecting self sends them both to the floor though Steve manages to keep himself under her despite the pain shooting up his spine for his efforts.

Omega is horrified. She sees the small drops of her drink that have landed on Steve’s work and on his clothes. Her apologies can’t come out fast enough as she searches out napkins or anything really to help mop up the mess, not caring about her own dripping state.

It takes Steve a moment to get past the pain shooting up his spine, but he’s doing his best to assure her that his work is fine and that he’s fine. He’s far more concerned to know if she’s okay after the spill she’d taken. Her clothes are matting against her body, and he knows that can’t be comfortable.

What he doesn’t expect is her to stop her frantic cleaning to stare down at his sketch. He really doesn’t expect her to recognize it or him as the online artist, but she does. She even confirms it by whispering, “I can’t believe I messed up your latest masterpiece. I’m so, so sorry” and follows it up with his online name. He’s a bit stunned to say the least.

The Alpha who pushed her is laughing it up, pleased that his little trip had done more than what he’d been hoping for after she had the nerve to turn him down.

Jake, who’d seen everything, steps out of line and rushes over to Steve and the Omega who is still doing her best to apologize to Steve and save the sketch he’d been working on. There are literal tears in her eyes and possibly a bit of fear when Jake approaches.

The Omega recognizes Jake belongs with Steve and the first thing that pops out of her mouth is “I’m so sorry, Alpha, I didn’t mean to make your talented Beta fall for me.”

Oh, Jake is now smitten, especially as he sees Omega’s cheeks grow quite pink and sees her quietly berate herself for her foot-in-mouth syndrome around cute Alphas and Betas.

It also unfortunately gets the other Alpha’s attention, who has taken to snarling his displeasure at her apparent interest in Jake and Steve. He even approaches to cause more trouble when she spots him. Her body goes rigid though her expression shifts to one of pure fire. If the Alpha wants some attention, then she’s going to get him some attention.

In less than two minutes, she has the entire café focused on the scene playing out between her and the Alpha bully. It’s enough to draw the attention of the female Alpha owner as well who bans the bully from her café.

Never in Steve’s or Jake’s experience have they ever seen an Omega take on an Alpha like she does with such expert handling. Both are quite sure they’re a little bit in love with her as she continues to make a stand against the Alpha with the café owner and some other patrons backing her up.

When the Alpha leaves with his proverbial tail between his legs, the owner offers to replace her drink and another set of clothes that she keeps on hand for herself to the Omega if she’d like them. She extends the offer of a free drink to Steve and Jake as well, not wanting to lose two innocent customers to that awful Alpha.

Already late for her big meeting, she declines the clothes but does take up the offer of a new drink. While she waits, she nervously checks in with Jake and Steve to make sure they’re okay and offers to repay them for any damage she might’ve caused thanks to the bullying Alpha.

Both of them assure her it’s fine. They’re just happy that she’s not hurt though they are a bit sad that their interaction is coming to an end.

Before she gets too far though, Jake reaches out to her though he stops just shy of actually touching her. He hasn’t forgotten the brief flash of fear in her eyes upon his earlier approach and can’t stand the thought of possibly frightening her more. When she does turn in his direction, he somehow miraculously doesn’t fumble his words as he asks her to maybe join him and Steve for dinner later that day. He doesn’t need to check with Steve to know he’s also interested in the Omega as well.

A commotion at the shop’s door pulls her attention, and a beautiful smile flits across her features as another Beta walks in with an Omega on his arm.

“What’s taking so long? We’re going to be late. Dear God, what happened to you?” the Beta demands while his Omega tries to shush him.

Their Omega merely shakes her head. “I’m coming, Ran. We had a little mishap, but I’m coming. I know better than to disappoint Ari’s friend.”

Their Omega turns to Jake and nods. “I would love to have dinner with you both if it’s not too much an imposition. Call me in about two hours?”

She slips Jake her business card before vanishing out the café’s door with the other Beta and Omega.

Jake waits exactly two hours before he nervously calls her, putting the call on speaker so Steve could hear everything as well. A small part of him hopes she doesn’t disappoint either of them while on the phone as it’s happened before.

She doesn’t.

Within minutes, they have their plans set to meet at a popular local diner where they could enjoy some good homemade meals while also getting to know one another.

She meets them there in a clean outfit that suits her more than the business suit she’d been wearing that morning. The knee length skirt swishes and twirls around her while the peasant top gives them a decent glimpse of the smooth skin underneath without being too showing. It’s her favorite outfit she admits to them while they wait for their server to arrive.

One of the first questions Steve has for her is how she recognized his work. He’s still a bit gobsmacked about that, especially since he hasn’t been able to get his mind to stop recalling how delicately she’d touched his work. It’d been almost like she’d been touching the Mona Lisa or something equally as valuable. It’s not something he’d experienced firsthand with anyone besides Jake or his few friends.

That’s when they learn Steve helped design her logo and other business media about a year ago. She’d seen his stuff online and had messaged him almost immediately with her ideas and healthy budget to make them a reality. As it turns out, she owns a small homemade candle company, and she’s just landed another retailer who’ll be showcasing her candles after her meeting that morning.

The attention and adoration she’s showing Steve in that moment would make almost any other Alpha jealous of their Beta. After all, she’s practically gushing about how amazing Steve’s art is and how much it’s helped improve her sales as everyone talks about the design. She’s even sent Steve more work because she can’t stop talking about it with her customers. Steve admits he should be giving her something in return for all the referrals and work she’s given him.

Yeah, Jake realizes he should be jealous, but he’s not. He’s the exact opposite at this moment. He’s sitting with someone who values Steve’s talents as much as he does, so how could he possibly be anything other than more smitten with her?

When Steve admits that Jake’s the reason he even has his online business, the talk soon moves to Jake where she learns about his many technical talents. He can see that she’s just as impressed with him as she is with Steve. It’s enough to stroke his ego a bit and have him sitting a bit straighter in his seat.

Their discussion soon moves to hobbies and other things where she soon learns that Jake likes to play one of the most popular first-person shooter games on the market. He admits he can hold his own, but he’s nowhere near as good as some of the other players out there. When he mentions ‘Amaranth Fossa’ as his dream gaming partner, he catches a look he can’t quite figure out that passes over Omega’s face.

They don’t really stop talking all through dinner, but it does eventually have to come to an end. It’s not something any of them want, but they do see that the hour is getting later and the next day is a workday for both Jake and Omega. They end up walking her to her car where she thanks them for a wonderful evening. She doesn’t get into her car until she presses a kiss on each of their cheeks and a promise that they’ll do this again soon.

Jake and Steve share a look, then Jake asks if she’s free the weekend coming up.  

She gives them the sweetest smile and says she is.

Jake and Steve head home after seeing her off. They have a date to plan, and they have no intention of disappointing this sweet Omega that literally dropped into their laps.

*****

Main Masterlist

[cryptidize]

So lately, I've been job searching again. Not a surprise, I know... I'm usually looking for something new at least once a year or so. But the reason is because I keep leaping from sinking ship to sinking ship - every job, both corporate and small business, has been failing spectacularly in some way.

I won't be talking about specifics, but let me mention some themes I notice to determine whether a job is going under.

1.) Labor Violations

Of course, this is always a red flag. If they tell you not to discuss pay with coworkers, this is a labor violation. There are many protections you have as an individual who works. These protections are not taught in school, nor college, nor by your families, so it's good to become familiar with your rights. You may even discover after reading this that your rights are being violated. If you find that is the truth, please see the Department of Labor and their process for reporting this violation. You may receive additional compensation for doing so, simply because of the violation.

2.) The Invisible Growth

Some jobs will claim they're the "fastest growing" xyz in the industry. Some places will claim they've had to expand their facilities, their workload, their staff. Growth is not always a bad thing, but once you're there, you may notice their pitfalls. Maybe their facility is in disrepair with a leaky roof. Maybe their workload increased, but not workers and pay. Maybe they're margin pinching about cleaning products. These are cause for some alarm, simply because they are growing, but not sustaining. Not ensuring every growth move is accompanied by standard procedures and improving work conditions can be damning in the future. The enshittification of business.

3.) Confusing Time Off

Some businesses will make language around time off confusing. Where I work currently, we have PTO (Personal Time Off), VTO (Voluntary Time Off) and VTO (Vacation Time Off). Personal and Voluntary are not paid. You cannot use either of these methods until after your 90 days. AFTER 1 YEAR, you earn Vacation time. When this was originally pitched to me, personal time was a replacement for sick time, but they conveniently left out that I wouldn't be compensated. I also have to let them know 2 weeks in advance for every day I use, and 6 weeks in advance to take Vacation Time longer than 1 day. Places do this in order to give the illusion of having a work/life balance.

4.) No Experts

Certain jobs (warehouses come to mind) have a high turn-over for all positions except management. When this happens, you start to run dry on expertise. Workers tend to talk and ask each other questions. This is a normal behavior in jobs, especially if training is brief or lacking in areas, but if no one is knowledgeable on the work they're doing, wrong/incomplete knowledge is being passed around. The main way i can diagnose this issue is within a business' IT Team. How many people do they have for every computer? Is it just one guy with an engineering degree? How often is the technology updated or cleaned? The laptops at my work are being charged with Nintendo Switch chargers and killed slowly because we have 1 guy with an engineering degree doing all the general IT and it Sucks. This is a symptom of the turnover.

I know this may seem like a random post, but now more than ever, businesses are violating our rights and protections, as well as our kindness as people. I'm tired of it! Unionizing is great, I love to see people banding together, but individuals have power too! You have every right to complain to the labor board! You can fight for your rights with or without a team! I wish you luck!

[zenkor123]

Journal of Peeta Mellark-out and about in District 13 WIP

October 3rd 75 ADD

Heres my account of Delly, the end of our decade long friendship was underwealming, maybe I should have seen the signs earlier. She seemed frustrated with me, then all that wiped away she saw me a coiple more times then the hospital told me she wasn't coming anymore it came as a shock. In the cafeteria even when I tried to greet her she ignored me, it was as if I never knew her. She treated me like I wasn't even there. I did alot of soul searching to find out what I did but I could not escape the obvious answer, that I already described in detail in my previous answer. It then dawned on me the full implications of this and many unsettling questions emerged. Who am I if not peeta? What will happen with me in the future? If Peeta Mellark died then could it have been prevented? If i had tried harder in treatment would Delly still have done what she had done? How did Peeta Mellark die? Their are memories that I repressed of my time in the capital that I review and live in. Even who was Peeta Mellark? These questions required more energy then the hunger games to answer. Under the guise of recuperating for work I laid in my bed alone(no one came to see me apparently coins orders) for several dies. Whatever emerges from the ruins of Peeta Mellark has to he capable of working, I can't be in the bed forever. Peeta Mellark has 17 years of experience so whatever emerges can recycle the rubble of the destroyed city that was Peeta.

Coin visits me in my hospital room as I get up. "Soldier Mellark how are you adjusting to District 13? I reply "I've been better madam president but looking forward!" "Great, we need you to do a job, we are preparing to Liberate Panem and the capital, as you were in the capital we need you to provide Intel starting this afternoon. "Always Madame president" I say "Great" Coin says and she leaves the room abruptly. Prim comes in next. I congratulate her on her nursing training. She tells me she does not approve of Coin's resource allocation I tell her I will manage. She asks me where I'm going to work, I first tell her about the Intel gathering then I gulp and tell her "I am also looking into morphling work." She makes a face, morphling work? She asks me I reply "you didn't think the people here were content to obey orders like drones?" I tell her "Plus I want to do something different then what I used to", "Something...New" . The time is now up, for visitors and she leaves and wishes me luck.

I continue discussions on working for the cartel of district 13 with salesman Brown. He shows me the various jobs of the cartel but he wants me to start light first to see if cartel work is for me. We start with exploring the tunnels of District 13. These are the tunnels, that move trash, and air from the surface, as well as move goods around. Fortunately the trash is in an enclosed pipe as is the bodily waste of 13. I won’t have to swim in that stuff. We start at the bottom most levels and work our way up. My climbing skills with the aid of ropes is adequate for the job. Their are windows to each room, I pass by Katniss’s bunk and involuntarily look down Katniss looks up at me eyes wide open. I proceed to the next level. Finnick says hi as I'm climbing I worry that I'm too noticeable. Salesperson Brown waves it off, he tells me that Coin approves of our hospital work and that the cartel is secret so it isn't tied to Coin. The tunnels have multiple layers the original tunnels built before the dark days was just ventilation. It was expanded after the dark days during the building projects of President Lucius Nero. The tunnels are uncomfortable but in the shadows I feel safer. I alone will chose when I'm in the open space now. It also goes straight to the woods. The ancient forests and grass of district 13 where most of the cartel's ancestors resided before the dark days. The forest bears the mark of the recent battle where the Capital just prior to the fall of the Nut sent 3,000 peacekeepers via hoovercraft to take 13's arsenal and win the war. The capital airforce was crippled I this attack and 13 mowed the peacekeepers down as they landed in their parachutes. The rest fell In heavy fighting in the forest itself. I remember the districts was locked down and my guard was tripled during that time. There are still bodies of peacekeepers that foresters are in the process of cleaning. This is my first time in the surface of 13, me and Ash also visit the lake. My reflection is so pale and white.

At night I visit the tunnels and drink some morphling but not enough that I completely escape so I can be aware while in the tunnels. I travel to the arboretum and see it at night. All of the cartel is up and is using the tunnels. Johanna is doing the same thing. She is drenched in morphling but gives me a cigarette, she is in no mood to talk so I leave her alone I will have plenty of opportunities to talk to her in the future. Katniss is sleeping and Haymitch is up but he does not notice me. I fall asleep in one of the chambers then wake up a few hours later and return to my room. I mostly remained in the same two levels of the tunnel system. In the morning my face turns white as people complain of a loud presence waking them up at night.

As Katniss reads this she remembers seeing Peeta's gaze, Peeta reminded her of a ghost, he looked Pale, and how she had noticed him at night as well pretending to be a sleep. Katniss had the unsettling thought that Peeta could kill her in her sleep Katniss’s attempts to appeal Coin's decision had failed. Was Peeta supposed to be in the tunnels? When she mentioned this to Coin the following morning Coin told her to mind her own business. She had not noticed the tunnel system before but a place of privacy like where Peeta was climbing appealed to her. Katniss tried to find the tunnels and in the following night, unable to find entrances she resorted to climbing to the ceiling but she could not get the hatch open. She could always recognize Peeta from the distinct thumping sound he made while climbing and later saw Peeta entering a hatch after lunch giving her access to Peeta's tunnels.

[nocompromise-noregrets]

five good things

I figure it's probably time for one of these; haven't done one in a while.

The migration of our file storage to Sharepoint at job number one is finally over, HOORAY. It seems to have gone fairly well, but the whole process was much more complicated than it needed to be and the communication/instructions was pretty dire throughout. But it's done and now I can stop masterminding that and go back to cataloguing my files at last.

I'm in the process of organising my catalogue database at job number two, also at last - I started transferring my predecessor's Word lists into it in about 2016 and once everything was in I started categorising everything in about 2020; the categorising is now done, and I'm working through the categories straightening everything out and assigning them numbers so that eventually if it goes into a proper database (it's in Excel at the moment as a convenient holder for the data, but I want to get it into the database at job number one as it would be so much easier to use). And it is DEEPLY satisfying. Everything is finally starting to make sense.

I've been after a pair of purple Doc Martens for most of the year - I got a pair of 'vegan' patent ones from ebay but they are bizarrely narrow and I can't wear them, even in one size up (I usually have no problem at all with Docs, they're always true to size for me but these are awful), and I've been keeping a saved search for the non-vegan blackcurrant 'lamper' ones from a few years ago but they seem quite rare and so far haven't come up in my size. And then last week one of my saved searches came up with a pair of 'purplish blue' glitter ones, in my size (it is a miracle) and they are the perfect shade of purple. I'm picky with my purples, I much prefer the blue-toned shades to the pink-toned ones, and these are just right. I love them so much!

I've finished both my Yuletide assignment (which went in a direction I was definitely not expecting XD ) and a treat for an old friend, so all I need to do is post them and that's that off my plate.

I'm really enjoying this year's English course - it's level 2, after I did the level 3 course first, and it's much easier, more sociolinguistics based, although I think I'm overthinking the assignments because I'm used to working at level 3 now. It's really interesting, so far we've had stuff about the history and spread of English, accents and pronunciation and how to use the Oxford English Dictionary, and for my first assignment I got - dear lord - 100%. Unheard of. I think I had 100% for one of the assignments on the beginner's German course, but I had an unfair advantage on that one because I'd retained a lot of my A-level German from thirty years ago. I actually rather struggled with this assignment (overthinking things, I think, but I found it quite complex) and wasn't expecting to have done nearly that well, so that was very satisfying.

I have one more week of work and then I'm taking three weeks off for Christmas to recharge, study, work on my WIPs with any luck, and just generally chill out. The parents are coming to us for Christmas Day, which will be nice, and they're staying at the pub (it's also a hotel) so we're going to have dinner there with them on Christmas Eve and then have them to ours for Christmas Day. Which means I'm going to have to dig out the decorations and lights, which I wasn't quite sure I was going to bother to do this year, but I think it'll do me good. Light everything as bright as possible and stick two fingers up at the darkness, is my general philosophy at this time of year. :D

I'm doing okay at the moment, I think - I don't usually do very well with winter, but this year seems to be easier than usual somehow. Let's see how I feel come January...

We're greatly enjoying the Doctor Who 60th anniversary specials - Ten and Donna were always our favourites, and it's been so great to see Fourteen being able to go back and resolve Donna's storyline. We rewatched their series and then kept going, because although we did give each new Doctor a try, we never really got on with them because we'd loved Ten so much so we've not actually watched a full series since Ten and Donna; and we're enjoying them now we've a) got a bit of distance, and b) got Ten back as Fourteen, I think XD I'm not very fond of Amy, but Rory is lovely and we've recently 'met' Mark Williams as his dad and he's just wonderful. :D

I'm knitting myself a poncho to wear for work as I bought one a few weeks ago and have been greatly enjoying swishing around in it so I thought I'd make myself another one; it's a bigger project than most of the ones I've done before but so far it's going okay and I'm having fun with it.

As always, if you like this format do feel free to take it and run with it - not compulsory to stick to five (I rarely do) but if you can manage to get up to five it's quite therapeutic, I find. The good things can be as big or as small as you like, much like that 'daily delight' thing that's been going round this year.

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hi Cas!!! I’m so appreciative for the safe space you’ve created and I wish only the best for you. If you have any wisdom for me I could really use it, this might be a lot and all over the place so please only answer if you have the spoons <3

In 1 week I’m quitting my job (along with the entire career path that goes with it) and I feel so broken over it. This career has been my dream since I was 11yo, it’s non-standard, creative, pays plenty, and gives me the freedom to choose what I work on, when I work, and who I want work with. I dropped out of my university with just 1 year left of my bachelors to pursue it because I hated school so much. I have genuinely put every ounce of myself into it. And... I hate it so much. I haven’t told anyone yet because I can barely admit it to myself.

I’m so scared because I don’t think I know who I am without this job. I feel like I have nothing else going for me in my life, I don’t have a group of people I can lean on and I can’t go finish my degree and have no other qualifications. It’s not that I feel I can’t make something of myself now because I know I can but it’s more so like starting next week everything I’ve done in my life will amount to a pile of nothing. And honestly? I feel pretty pathetic realizing that I only really have my job, I’m not good with people and don’t make friends easily and when I do I can’t bring myself to make them last, I’m not incredibly smart or clever, and tbh I don’t think luck has ever been on my side.

I’m also scared that I’m giving up on something that I shouldn’t. I can’t help but feel like I ruined it for myself in a very Vienna way. I was 19 when I left school and I don’t think I ever coped with the overwhelming feeling of oh my god I have to work everyday for the rest of my life and have real responsibilities now and what if that was too much and if I started my job when I was 22 I’d be fine and I’d still love it. I’m absolutely certain in my decision to leave but I don’t know how I’m going to confront losing everything I know about my identity. And what if when I do figure something else out, my tragic disconnectedness makes me hate that too because I feel like it’s inevitable that I grow to hate everything around me.

Hi!

Oh god, this is SO relatable for me. And really, I think you're definitely doing the right thing.

A few things...

First of all, even though you're quitting your job now, that doesn't make the work you did in the past suddenly amount to nothing. It's still something you can be proud of. Hell, from a purely neutral standpoint, holding a job for a decent amount of time looks great on a resume!

I also think it's absolutely brave an commendable that you're taking a step to better your life by searching for what makes you happy. There's NOTHING wrong with doing that at all, and I genuinely wish I could do the same.

As far as realizing your job is your identity- I've been there. During covid, when I couldn't teach, I realized that teaching had become my entire personality. I took all my self-worth from being a good teacher. And I went through a literal depression. But it forced me to find hobbies and spend time with my wife (then-fiancee) and rethink things that are important to me.

Take this time to figure out what makes you you. What hobbies do you enjoy? What makes you happy? Go out by yourself to a bar or to a movie or an art class. Find what makes you feel fulfilled and do it a lot.

You've got this, and I'm SO proud of you for taking this step!

(Also I am naming all the anons who write to me in case they want to write in the future, and I am using a random positive affirmation generator to do so. So I dub thee: brave anon. Enjoy your free tag!)

[aonoexpat]

29-08-2023

While my mood continues to swing, I do feel like I am finding my way again in this adventure :)

I tried my luck with the job search in the Tāhuna area, including Wānaka. On my way there I got caught up in the evening rush hour, and decided to wait it out in a resting bay by the side of the road. The farmer that lived there must have had their fair share of rude tourists, because they had gone through the trouble of putting up this sign, which was quite a funny sight to me:

I spent two nights in Wānaka and met some lovely people in the SC parking spot, who I had the honour of teaching my favourite card game to. I did unfortunately discover a patch of (dreaded and inevitable) mould in the MDF my bed is made of 💔 So, I spent the next days attacking it with bleach and sandpaper, and I think I've killed most of it. I've been airing out the bed as much as I can, and will just have to live with it as it is now. Luckily I am told it is not harmful and unlikely to spread!

After a seemingly pointless job interview back in Tāhuna and no responses from any potential employers for several days, I decided to throw in the towel. Most of the hospitality gigs wanted a long-term commitment that I wasn't ready to offer. I realised that even if I found a place that would have me for only three months instead of the regularly requested six, that would still mean I'll have spent 2/3 of my time in this country working when I go back home. Though I could really use the money, that's not worth it to me. I'm proud of trying, but my heart wasn't fully in it, especially with the extreme scarcity of accommodation in the entire region due to ski season. When I do get my next job, I want to be able to enjoy it. So instead I sent my first e-mail to a Dutch IT company in hopes of starting the journey to secure a well-paying job for when I get back home! I'd rather re-earn money well spent here on a spectacular adventure than save it and miss out on some truly unique opportunities in these parts.

In the true spirit of making the most of my time here, I booked a trip for the very next day to go see Piopiotahi, one of Ata Whenua's most spectacular and accessible fiords. The entire day had me smiling ear to ear, from the moment our enthusiastic tour guide picked me up from the Tāhuna bus terminal in the early morning to the goodbyes we said in the late evening. There were 11 other people on the tour with me from all corners of the world, and it was great to feel part of a group again. We talked about our favourite places around the world, our careers, and on the ride back to Tāhuna we all got to share a party song using the driver's Spotify account (I picked this one). I was also able to get some great advice from the driver, who was local as could be, about spots worth visiting on the rest of my trip. He reignited this little spark of inspiration I've had in me ever since I went traveling on my own for the first time back in 2014: the aspiration to maybe one day be a tour guide myself. He told me something I've only ever heard a handful of people, including my father, say before: he doesn't work a day in his life, because he truly enjoys what he does from the bottom of his heart. If that's not a career goal, I don't know what is 🤩

On this tour, we drove the almost 300 km to Piopiotahi while our guide told us everything we wanted to know about the area. We experienced quite some rain, but in the morning that just meant we had some beautiful rainbows to look at from the car windows:

Soon we entered the national park, and again that sense of driving from one biome into another hit like a ton of bricks. In a matter of seconds, the scenery suddenly looked like this:

We were surrounded by beech trees, and the rain only got worse as we drove. We went for a little walk at the Mirror lakes, which unfortunately weren't mirror-ing very well due to the weather, but the views were still worth it:

After a quick stop at Knob Flats, I started to seriously appreciate the fact that I didn't have to drive these roads myself. Not only would it have been more expensive than the tour in terms of fuel, but these roads are not for the faint-hearted. They are perpetually wet and slippery, winding as can be, and on top of that they encompass a 21-kilometer long, so-called "avalanche risk area": a stretch of road on which you are not allowed to stop driving under any circumstances:

Not long after, the tour guide swapped out the generic pop music for movie soundtracks; a much better fit for our new surroundings. He explained to us that in these parts, the ground is almost entirely made up of pure granite. This means there is virtually no top soil present in the ecosystem. The rocks are overgrown with moss, which provides just enough hold for the massive beech trees to take root, which are in turn also overgrown with moss. Due to the rain, all the mountains were overflowing with innumerable delicate little waterfalls, that made the whole place (to me) reminiscent of Iknimaya: the floating mountains in the Avatar movie.

We stopped next at Monkey Creek, both to admire the views and to fill our water bottles from the stream of crystal clear mountain water. To my absolute elation we were welcomed by a pair of Kea, which came running over to us as soon as we had parked, hoping to steal the crisps from the bus. They had me doing tippy taps of pure excitement! I had been looking forward to meeting these amazing mountain parrots for months, and I finally got to lay eyes on them. They are very clever birds, and for some reason they thoroughly enjoy destroying any rubber they can get their beaks on, so our tour guide had to stay with the bus at all times to protect the windscreen wipers!

We went for another hike in the prehistoric wilderness of the forest, one of very few places left on earth that have truly been untouched by human hands, and show what a jungle might have looked like in the Jurassic era:

And then, finally, we made it to Piopiotahi! We had officially reached the West coast of Te Waipounamu. Our boat awaited us patiently, ready to take us on a little cruise through the fiord and out to sea before bringing us safely back to port. We were so lucky that the rain let up for most of the cruise, only starting to pour down again as we were on our way back. This place deals with, I kid you not, nine meters of rain per year. Only two of the waterfalls in the photos below are permanent falls. The rest only happen when it's raining!

These detail photos show the trees directly growing on the granite. In order to survive in these harsh circumstances, the trees' roots connect to each other in one big network. This, unfortunately, also means that if one of them breaks and falls, it tears others down with it, resulting in "scars" in the vegetation down the side of the valley. In the second photo you can also see copper, iron and quartz deposits in the granite!

On our way back, we got to see a beautiful sunset over Lake Te Anau:

That night I went to sleep very tired, but very satisfied. The only blemish on the day was the fact that after the tour I tried to refill my water tank from a public tap, only to find it not working, so I had to spend 10 minutes pouring FORTY (40) cups of water into my tank from a public bathroom sink. Would not recommend. The cherry on top was that it was one of those fancy exe-loo electronic bathrooms, so I got to listen to some nice elevator music for a while before the voice started scolding me with its "Your use time has expired. Please leave this bathroom immediately" lines 😂

The next day I took the leap, spread my wings once again and left Tāhuna in my rear-view mirror! It felt very empowering to choose my own path again. I really wanted to make it all the way to the Southernmost tip of Te Waipounamu, and so after fueling up I turned up the music and drove for hours. My most invigorating tracks of the day were these two. I raced the sunset, and, unlike the good people of Rise Against, I won!

I burst through the gate in the fence and felt like I was running to the very end of the world. I was all alone when I greeted the icy winds at Slope Point, the most Southern tip of mainland Aotearoa!

I stayed to watch the sun go down and walked back to Elrond with a skip in my step and this song in my head, before finding a spot to sleep for the night. I was a happy camper, though my gas cooker has decided to malfunction. I'm hoping to get it fixed in the next few days!

[janggtoco]

hi dear honey !! it’s been a hot minute </3 may is kicking my ass

what’s up with you <3 how have you been?? i saw that you’ve become closer with some of your moots and to that i say I AM HAPPY 4 U it’s such a great feeling to be surrounded by pleasant people! also not sure if you were moots on your old blog but do you know/remember mushroom? i miss her </3 and many other caratblr blogs who left :/ tumblr is soooo . these days

i recently made the decision to quit med school lol 😭 i’m currently applying for a job for the FIRST TIME EVER with no relevant experience whatsoever because all my life i was on the pre-med -> med track……. what are corporate recruiters gonna do with my knowledge in pathology.. pls wish me luck 😫

hope you have a great week ahead 🩵🩵

🐻‍❄️

omg hi wonderful!! i was thinking about you this whole time fr!! i’m sorry your may is stressful and if it makes you feel better, mine has been too 😭

life has been pretty ok :3 stressful mostly with finances and family but ok!! but yes 🥺 i love my moots so much.. i've gotten really close with a lot of them by just annoying them daily with my presence <3 it's weird bcs my days used to be so quiet and i'd get stuck in my head a lot bcs i had no one to talk to, but now my days are filled with a lot of love and comfort! like a lot of my friends i can only say are just my comfort place now and idk.. my brain is still mean sometimes but my friends make sure i don't listen to it so much anymore :3 and i'm forever grateful for that hehe. and i do remember mushroom! i wasn't mutuals with her but i had friends who were and she always seemed so lovely~ but i agree, if you don't have your comfortable group of friends, tumblr is kind of... :/ it has its ups and downs

WOAH that's such a big decision and i'm so proud of you!! it's difficult to come to that decision!! if it makes you feel any better, my whole life was pre-vet track until my sophomore year of college and i realized being a vet just wasn't for me and i went into wildlife biology! and now i don't work in either field and work a normal corporate job 😭 trust me, a little bit of education and some work or leadership experience can actually go a long way! i mean, look at me! i believe in you and i'll be sending you all my good energy <33

ty bb;; i hope you have a wonderful wonderful week ahead of you too! keep me updated on the job search!!!

[cupcakewebkinz]

Ooh ohh what gameee :D

And I've been!!!! Eh.

Had covid again that was no bueno but also I have ordered a new drawing tablet because my old one was giving up on me

I am now poor

But!! Have job

Which is good

I clean 👌

It's just a silly roblox game, it's called Astro Renaissance, it's just a silly dress up and rp game but they have plus sized options and so many cool things that I've been grinding to get myself mostly everything hahaha

Oh I hope you're feeling better, I only had that in 2020, before uh, people knew it was in America. It was a week before though so I wasn't too surprised, people fly under the radar often since American healthcare is so fucked up rn

I'm still job searching myself, but not many places are hiring and they all had online applications, which sucked because I couldn't do those on mobile (the websites would break) and I didn't have any other options, so I had to wait until my mom got my computer wiped and then reinstalled windows on it herself. Now it's working great because the update that broke it got wiped too! And now I'm waiting for the places to get back in touch with me after I did a few applications yesterday.

I'm begging for luck with this one because I uh, I'm desperate for a job, if I don't get one before I'm 23 I'm gonna be homeless man.

[sage-of-ars-argentum]

A post? On a B l o g?? More Common Than You Think

So, I know basically nobody follows me. It doesn't really or truly matter if you do. The Tumblr experience is curated anyway, I have like one or two mutuals who might see this just because I posted this, and that's basically it.

I just needed to ramble. Mind is racing and I need to organize my thoughts so I can get good sleep in before work tomorrow. Best way to do that is to write.

Besides, I'm an aspiring writer anyway. Wouldn't hurt to get some practice in, you know? There's no polite way to put it. I'm having a Bad Time. Looking for work, that's basically all that need be said, really.

I've sent applications in to a couple of handfuls of places nearly every day, and most of the rest I've either been at my temporary job(I need something with better hours) or I've been resting from the week.

Best practices are things like specifying your resume for each individual job, or making sure you have a contact within the company who can vouch for you. I have neither for most cases, which is a great start. I'm also doing this without a college degree to my name, so I'm even more doomed than the average guy my age. I can't do much. I'm unskilled and generally weak. Best I can tend to hope for is a minimum wage position at a register, and I'd KILL to be taken for one of those at this point! I've been passed over and ignored so much more often than I care to admit. It's frustrating, it hurts. I got my Food Handler's Permit, I created a banger of a resume out of every scrap of excuses I could make for myself that I could call experience for the past eight years, I made a LinkedIn account and have been on a constant prowl almost day in and day out.

I just... I hate my luck. Hate it. Without question, absolutely hate it. I have been having a great deal of grief conducting the search for gainful employment. Hell, not even gainful. Just steady. I just need full time hours. That's literally all I truly need. Some job and the ability to do it long and hard enough. I don't care what else is asked of me. I'll debase myself, I'll sing your praises, I'll get up on my high horse and pretend I'm the hardest worker in the room for as long as you happen to be able to smell in my direction. I can't pretend I'm not trying, but the sheer amount of failure I've been facing, the raw radio silence, it's just... I can't do this. I've been getting nearly constant spam emails because I've gone searching on terrible, horrible websites trying to find a place, a suitable position, whether on-line or off-line, squeezing at every last fruit I can grasp no matter how low it hangs, no matter how many bugs I see on it because maybe one day I can actually taste of the victory I need to continue my journey. I will clarify that I do currently have work, it's just not nearly what I need. I need the steadiness, and I lack that most of all. Having written all this... I don't know. Feel a bit better, having vomited all my words onto the screen, we'll see if I sleep any better tonight. And hey, look at that. A blog post. Not gonna tag this. It's just a rant.

[harryhandstan]

HIIII happy (late) 4th of july!!

you are literally the sweet person to ever exist i can’t believe its been like 2 years since we last spoke. its crazy how time flies

oh noooo im sorry that happened to you :(( im glad ur doing better and taking good care of yourself 💓💓 wishing u a speedy recovery!

alsoooo good luck with house hunting! that must be so exciting!!looking for a new place to call home and making new memories in it! i just know youll find the most beautiful homey and perfect place!! im manifesting for u

im doing well!! not much happened except for school stuff but i just went to my first ever pit concert a few months ago! i saw the driver era (only because i thought ross lynch was hot lol) i didnt know what to expect for pit but i didn’t expect to stand for 8 hours straight 😭😭 AHHHH ALSO im seeing taylor swift in a few weeks and i literally cannot wait!!!!

im always thinking about u! talk to u soon!! good luck 🍀 love youuuuuuu!!! 💗💓💓💞💕

-🧸

happy late 4th of july to you too bestie!! I hope you had a great day!!

I'm sorry for the delay in answering this btw it's been storming here so my wi-fi has been in and out all day!

omg stop you're so kind to me I genuinely love talking to everyone and I consider you and many others here my friends so y'all make it easy to just repay the love I've been given!!

it's actually only been a year bub! I only know because I looked it up to refresh my memory about what we talked about before cause like I said a lot had happened and I couldn't remember if we'd talked since my accident. it was last year after my birthday and after harry's house came out. but really it's alright I don't want you to feel bad!

thank you so much for the well wishes ❤ I realized after that I left some detail out of what happened to me and didn't explain it very well, but if I ramble on too much just feel free to skip over it! basically not only was I kicked but I went flying about 8 feet across my yard too, which caused me to have a compression fracture on T11 of my spine. I also had a contusion on my right hip (which is just a really, really deep and bad bruise), which is where the point of impact was. I will (hopefully) continue to improve, but having arthritis still causes me to have a ton of pain if I do too much physical activity. that part of my spine is also partly collapsed and always will be, but my neurosurgeon said that as long as my arms and legs are still okay that I should just slowly start to get back to "normal" life and listen to my body as I go along! I asked if I needed to keep up with x-rays or anything over the years but he said my symptoms would get much, much worse if the collapse got any worse and I would know I need to come back to see him. he also said IF I would've had to have surgery that it would take like 12 pins and a huge rod to correct things so I'm so SO lucky that things weren't any worse!

thank you so much for helping us manifest!!! it means more than you'll ever know because it hasn't been easy so far trying to find a place 😔 we live in such a rural area in GA and we originally wanted to stay in the same town because I was supposed to start a new job in january and we wanted to be close to my work. I probably won't get to take that job now (which is a whole other long story), and since there are very limited options we're probably gonna have to broaden our search to surrounding towns that are slightly bigger! we ultimately want a house together, but I think we're gonna have to settle for an apartment for now until we can find the perfect place for us. anything would be better than here rn though!!!

idk if I've ever talked much about my dad to you but we have as no contact of a relationship as possible even though we live in the same house. he's the reason for my accident and so the day it happened and we were waiting for the ambulance to come my mom told him that we wouldn't be coming back to this house. but then we had no choice we didn't have the money or resources needed to go elsewhere. I was worried as I got better she would forget about that and slip out of that mindset, but thankfully she hasn't! she just told me tonight we'd probably go look at apartments next week and that she can't wait to get out of here. I could truly cry at the thought of having a safe, clean, and comfortable space away from him. it's what my mom, my siblings, and our dogs all deserve!

how is school going? how much longer do you have to go? and oohh I'm so happy you got to experience a concert in pit!! it's amazing but it is soooo exhausting I hope you got lots of rest afterward 😊 when I saw harry I wore my ankle support thing to my pit concert to because I knew my feet would be swollen the next day probably. and taylor swift that's so cool!! I'm very excited for you!! I hope you have the best time!!! where are your seats for that show?

I'm always thinking about you too!! seriously sometimes I'll just think about you or how you're doing so just know you're always getting any spare good vibes I have sent your way ✨ thank you thank you for the good luck!!! love you moreeeee 🤍

I was gonna tell you about getting to see stevie nicks and my road trip to see my little brother but I talked so much this time we'll save those stories for next time if you wanna hear about them!!

[kosmic-songbird]

Ik I don't really have a lot of followers but I wanted to make this announcement anyways. So, here goes, know that if you see any sad or venty posts I'm just going through it rn.

I'm going to try to tag these posts as #bad brain so you can block that tag if you need to because I know how it is when someone is constantly in doom and gloom mode without reprieve and I don't wanna force that on anyone. Not even unintentionally.

That being said, this blog is kinda my echo chamber so I will be using it here and there for some sad girl hours posting. Normally I wouldn't, but I just... I need somewhere to ramble without feeling like I'm going to overwhelm my loved ones.

So let's sum up why I feel The Worst™ right now, shall we? I recently lost a job I really liked because my Bipolar 2 disorder spiralled after I moved and I now have no money and feel like a constant burden. Searching for another job has been disastrous because my anxiety and aforementioned BP is acting up so bad I can't keep a sleep schedule, take my meds regularly, do basic things, or even regularly do things I love so I've been very selective about applying for jobs because I don't want to lose another one if I can't handle it. One of those things I'm floundering at is worshipping my Goddess (Hekate) my ancestral spirits (Cara and Great Grandpa Spurgeon) and my ancestral/land spirit (The Deer Woman--I'm a registered Lower Muskogee Native American but I look white AF and am more white than native so I normally keep my tribal practices and beliefs close to my chest. It's very personal to me alone so I don't feel it super appropriate to share much of that on here). My orchids are also hurting since I'm struggling and that hurts because I literally have 9 of them and they're all named. My dogs miss their momma being present and more affectionate. I think even my cat knows something is wrong. My physical health is abysmal too rn. My best friend decided that me setting some boundaries was too much for her and after a nasty falling out I'm starting to believe she used some sort of hex on me. I'm going home to my absurdly haunted house tomorrow to visit my family and I'm terrified because I tried banishing whatever the thing that hates me there was and it kept coming back within hours. I literally couldn't be in a room alone without being scared, emotionally distraught, or experiencing paranormal activity at that house by the end of it. Yet, even with that, I'm happy to go home to my somewhat problematic conservative, Christian family because hey, at least I'll be out of the house and talking to someone other than my boyfriend. (He's wonderful but I think we all need friends outside our significant others, no?) They're really, really excited to see me and it just feels like a tiny ray of light to be wanted. God, I even tried to sell my feet pics out of desperation 2 and my account on the site I was using got suspended??? I only uploaded once and didn't use the messaging system at all?? Like geez, I can't catch a break and it sucks. I really, really just want something to go right for me soon. My boyfriend can't keep working as hard as he is to take care of us both without my help and I owe it to myself to get better. I really want to feel better.

Okay, that's enough moping for now. I'm going to try to get on with it. Wish me luck 💙

[zodiyack]

Rude! (3,000+ Follower Fic Special 1/3)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Female!Hopper!Reader

Warnings: Swearing, Billy stuff, lyrics, fluff

Song: Rude by Magic!

Words: 1,798

Summary: Billy's love for Hopper's daughter is too strong to be stopped by the tough Chief Jim Hopper. Despite being told "not in a thousand years", he plans to love her regardless.

Note: Thank you so so much! I love you all, and writing your ideas, as well as sharing mine with you, has been so fucking fun and amazing! I'm sorry for my lack of words, I wish being an author came in handy with writing this, however, all I can say is that I love you all from the bottom of my heart. I've seen people do shout-outs, and ask-related stuff with their follower things, and I may do that, I'm not sure. For now, I hope you enjoy this... Thank you all, again!

Also 1/3 means that there will be two other fics released for the 3,000+ follower present!

Taglist: @urie-bowie-mercury, @matth1w, @redspaceace-writes, @fandom-puff, @darling-i-read-it, @simonsbluee, @sebastianstanslefteyebrow, @dpaccione

Masterlist | Stranger Things Masterlist

"Saturday morning, jumped out of bed and put on my best suit. Got in my car and raced like a jet all the way to you. Knocked on your door with my heart in my hands, to ask you a question, 'cause I know that you're an old-fashioned man. Yeah."

Billy was freshly graduated, working as a lifeguard whilst his girlfriend worked her own job, both saving up for their chance to ditch Hawkins and move to California. Sweet Cali. Billy was excited to show the love of his life around the place he called home. Though, physically, he left the salty ocean and windy beach behind, the place never truly left him.

You could see it in his eyes. The waves crashing in his blue orbs. He swore the scent had just barely clung to his belongings; the smell of the tangy air that followed a majority of the state. Working at a pool was the closest he got to the memory of California. Chlorine was most certainly not the salted ocean waters, but with the circumstances, he decided it'd do.

The way his face lit up whenever he talked about his home...it made Y/n more and more excited to see it. His girlfriend had grown up in Hawkins, stayed there her whole life. Never once did the Hoppers leave Hawkins.

But the second that was introduced to Billy, he knew it had to change.

Although they were saving for a big move, Billy had...other things in mind with what to do with his first large pay-check (or series, rather. Working as a lifeguard didn't pay well with just one check). He began to work more shifts to make up for the money he'd spent, and one day after calling in for a day off, he decided to put his plan into action.

"Billy, stop messing with the tie."

"It's annoying." Hands slapped away his attempts of adjusting the black silk tie.

"Well it won't stop being annoying if you keep fucking it up."

For the first time in a long time, Neil Hargrove was calm. Not happy, not amused, not pissed off for some unjust reason- just calm. He wasn't wreaking havoc and he wasn't being an asshole to his son. Billy hadn't seen this side of his dad in quite some time, in fact, he thought something important was going on and he was about to fuck it all up. And then, Susan retreated to the living room with a camera and a freshly ironed suit.

"You're not putting me in that."

"And who asked for your opinion?" Neil deflected with a raised brow. One heavy sigh later and Billy was leaving the bathroom, dawning the whole black and white getup.

Susan clasped her hands over her mouth, a tear leaving her eye, "You look so handsome! Just like your dad!"

Billy rolled his eyes, "Great."

However, his careless attitude was swept under the rug when the blue Camaro pulled up to the police station, interrupting a clearly distressed Chief Hopper bickering with his daughter. Billy had to get himself together before stepping out of the car, jaw slack after seeing the beauty he got to call his date.

"Hello Mr-"

"Don't even try play nice with me, Hargrove. She's not going anywhere with you. End of story." Hopper kept his eyes trained on the blond, body tense like a snake preparing to strike it's prey.

Y/n grabbed Billy's arm, slowly directing him to the car, "And in the sequel, we find out I am going with Billy. End of that story."

"There is no 'sequel.' The writer got drunk and lazy." She paused, turning to face her father who stood tall, arms crossed and face unamused.

"So his daughter picked up where her father left off, and then the sequel was published and the two lived happily ever after, the end."

While her dad attempted to search for a line that would better hers and force her to stay, she pushed Billy toward the driver's side and slid into the car as fast as she could, rolling down the window as Billy started it up. "Bye! I'll be back before midnight!"

The two drove off toward the school, leaving behind a trail of dust and very, very, pissed off Hopper.

Prom was better than Billy thought it would be. He didn't want to go at first, but after Max found out and spoke to her mom about it (the little redhead a cupid-in-the-making), Neil pushed him to go (as he was "doing something else besides being a lazy-no-good rebel"). It was then that he called Y/n and asked if she'd be going.

The suit came in handy. Clashing with his rocker aesthetic, he put it back on once more. The once-annoying tie proved to be somewhat okay in the end.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend, but the answer is no!"

Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too? Why you gotta be so rude? I'm gonna marry her anyway. Marry that girl, marry her anyway! Marry that girl, yeah, no matter what you say! Marry that girl, and we'll be a family! Why you gotta be so rude?

With a deep breath, he ran-over the conversation in his head once more. Like a script for an actor, he had thought of every possible outcome and every possible line for him to face it with. He almost chickened out as his fist rose to the door, but it was too late, for his knuckles rapped against it before he realized he was even knocking.

El opened the door, eyes wide when she saw the familiar mullet and button-down. "Papa..." She muttered as she backed away and out of view.

Hopper traded places with her, his lazy expression sobering up instantaneously, replaced with a grumpy scowl. "Hargrove."

"Mr. Hopper, sir."

"What are you doing on my front porch?"

He swallowed roughly, palms sweaty against his sides. "I was wondering if I could talk to you."

"You seem to be doing just that right now, Hargrove." Hop crossed his arms and clenched his jaw.

Well, this was certainly not something Billy had thought of. He was on panic mode internally, attempting to find any response that could save his hide and accomplish what he set out to do. Unfortunately, the word-vomit button seemed to be misplaced under the button labeled "help".

"I'd like to marry your daughter, sir."

Hop's eyes grew just as big in size as El's had when she opened the door. He choked on his own surprise, coughing it off, then glaring at the boy in front of him. "Over my dead body, Hargrove. If that's all, I'd strongly advise you to get off of my fucking porch while you're still alive."

I hate to do this, you leave no choice; can't live without her. Love me or hate me, we will be boys- standing at that alter. And we will fly away, to another galaxy, you know. You know she's in love with me, she will go anywhere I go-

"Billy, he's just stubborn."

"No, no, I don't think he likes me."

Y/n sighed, rubbing her boyfriend's back. He hadn't told her of his proposal plans, only that Hop seemed to have it out for him. "It'll take time, but he'll warm up to you!"

"It's been how many years since he's met me?"

"To be fair, your reputation wasn't doing you any good until now..."

"It's not like that was fucking obvious." He slouched further down in the front seat of his Camaro. To Billy, all hope was lost. If he couldn't get Hopper to give him his blessing, he was sure he'd lose his goddamned mind.

Y/n frowned. Her frown flipped around as an idea popped into her head, her lips finding Billy's knuckles and quirking his attention. "Even if he never likes you, I'm not going anywhere."

Billy laughed softly, "he'll fucking kill me if you go against him."

"Eh, that's only if he can catch us."

"You're out of your fucking mind, Y/n Hopper."

"I know."

The rest of the night was spent in the Camaro, of course, doing one of Billy's favorite pastimes. By the time the sun rose, Billy was sneaking a kiss to a giggling Y/n before dropping from her window in the cabin and running to his car, parked far enough that Hop or El wouldn't notice. He blew her one more kiss, which she pretended to catch, then he broke into a sprint.

Maybe, he thought, just maybe; there was still a chance.

His knuckles hit the door again, shifting on his feet nervously. It swung open to reveal Hopper, an unimpressed look bringing no surprise Billy's way. It was quite expected, honestly.

"What." His tone made it clear he wasn't up for fucking around.

"Mr. Hopper, if you just give me one chance to prove to you that-"

"No, no, no, no, no. Let me make it very clear to you that I want you to have nothing to do with my daughter whatsoever. No marriage, no friendship, I don't even approve of you guys fucking or whatever-"

"We're in a serious relationship, sir. It's nothing like you think it is."

This made Hop laugh. He continued to do so, holding his stomach, until he realized Billy was unamused. "Oh, you're serious?... My answer is still no, Hargrove. My answer will always be no. Go find someone else's daughter's heart to break. You're not hurting mine."

"It's not like-"

Before he could even get the words out, he was met with a door in his face. Turned down, again.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend, 'cause the answer's still no!"

Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too? Why you gotta be so rude? I'm gonna marry her anyway. Marry that girl, marry her anyway! Marry that girl, yeah, no matter what you say! Marry that girl, and we'll be a family! Why you gotta be so rude, rude?

Again, again, and again, Billy incessantly pleaded with Hopper. Different tactics were all met with the same answer; rejection.

He held up a sign outside the cabin, only for Hopper to close the curtain and chuckle as he sipped his coffee.

He asked at the door again, only for Hop to threaten to give him a black eye (which was met with "aren't you the sheriff? Isn't that illegal?").

He raced past the police station, Max leaning out the window with another sign, only for Hop to threaten them with holding cells.

He even went as far as to ask Max and El to help, but Hopper had none of that, and sent Max home with a rant full of nos.

However, if Jim Hopper thought any of it would get it into Billy's head that getting his blessing was just not happening- he was as wrong as Nancy when she claimed not to have feelings for Jonathan.

Billy had another plan in mind, and this one was impossible to say no to.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend- but no still means no!"

"Hopper." Billy stood before his desk, interrupting his nice date with a delicious doughnut, and earning a very annoyed glare. "I got Miss Byer's blessing. Aren't you two a thing?"

"You son of a-"

"I got Eleven's too."

"Hargrove, I'm gonna-"

"Before you cuss me out, I think you should know that I've got a stable job, an interview with a mechanic so I have a job when the pool closes for the winter, and I've got a house on the market I'm looking at. I'm devoted to your daughter and she's devoted to me. You may not like me, but I think you're a great dad, better than the one I was unfortunately stuck with. You raised a strong and amazing woman. She's incredible and I admit, she deserves better than me-"

"You don't have to say that twice." Hopper huffed, crossing his arms.

"I know she deserves so much better than me, I'm surprised she's even with me too. But she loves me, and I think you can see that. I love her too. I would never, in a million years, break her heart."

Jim stayed silent for a few minutes. The silence brought uneasiness to Billy, but that was intentional on Hopper's behalf. He finally piped up with a cough, clearing his throat, before his piercing eyes met Billy's blue orbs.

"I'll hold you to that, Hargrove."

Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too? Why you gotta be so rude? I'm gonna marry her anyway. Marry that girl, marry her anyway! Marry that girl, yeah, no matter what you say! Marry that girl, and we'll be a family! Why you gotta be so rude? Why you gotta be so rude?

Bonus:

(after the wedding)

"What was that about a no?" Billy quipped with his infamous smirk.

"You're lucky I'm sheriff, Hargrove."

Why you gotta be so rude?

[sirenascales]

-> double black [part one] 18+

-> Chuuya x 1stPov!F!Reader x Dazai

-> Who knew getting fired from work could lead to this?

-> Content: SMUT, slight angst, violence, murder, swearing

A night out drinking leads to a small misunderstanding with a handsome, yet dangerous man. [Chuuya x 1stPOV!F!Reader]

3,894 words

note: edited this so it could still be read as a reader fic! it's actually a lot of fun writing in first person! hope those who read this enjoy my first bsd fic!

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Final || masterlist

I've experienced a lot of amazing things since I've moved to Japan. A new job in a different country, new co-workers and friends, work parties, themed bars, cafes, and hookups with pretty strangers. There was a long list of great things I've had going on, and a long list of things I've never expected... and being fired from the job I had for a year was not one of them.

"A year of hard work... for nothing," I mumbled bitterly as I sat at the bar with my close friend, and now ex-coworker, Keiko. She was beautiful, with long black hair and brown eyes. She frowned, a sympathetic look on her pretty face as she sighed.

"I'm so sorry," she said softly, giving my shoulder a squeeze. "I'm sure you'll find something else soon! You have an awesome resume, and you're an amazing worker who can speak English, Japanese AND Spanish... there is totally a place for you out there!"

Keiko has always been supportive and enthusiastic, a really bright and friendly girl who made it her mission to befriend me as soon as I started working with her. She was relentless, and soon enough, I found myself spending many hours with the woman.

"Yeah..." I just mumbled again and she laughed softly.

"It's okay to mope... that's why I brought you here!"

"Yeah, about that," I started, sending Keiko a look as I swiveled the stool so my body faced her. "Why did you bring me here?" As soon as the work day was done, Keiko immediately dragged me to what was clearly a mafia bar. That didn't surprise me, since she was actually dating a mafioso.

A mafioso, who was part of the Port Mafia. It wasn't long after I moved to Yokohama that I started to hear stories about the organization, and was also warned not to cross them. Of course, with my luck, I became best friends with someone who dated someone who was in the Port Mafia. How a sweet girl like Keiko ended up with a man like him, I'll never know.

What I do know is that Taichi adored Keiko, gave her everything she could possibly want and need with the money he makes, and that was just being a normal grunt! Even so, it was dangerous, but Keiko didn't seem to mind.

"I come here with Taichi all the time," Keiko answered, sipping her drink. I turned to sip on my own. "You can't tell me it isn't luxurious." It was. My jaw had dropped to the floor when we first stepped into the very luxurious bar. "Don't worry about it, okay? Drink your sadness away! You're safe here. Since I am Taichi's woman, and you're with me, nothing will happen, okay?"

"Where is Taichi anyway?" I asked, glancing over her shoulder when I spotted a group of men walking in through the entrance. I missed the way the light left Keiko's eyes, chewing on her bottom lip anxiously. My eyes were on the men, which in the middle was a man with orange hair, a black hat adorning his head. I felt my breath hitch in my throat, my eyes looking at the very handsome man up and down. I swallowed thickly.

"He had a job tonight and couldn't make it. He'll be home to- hey, what are you looking at?" Annoyed at me ignoring her, she turned in her seat, a shocked look on her face before she smiled tightly.

"Taichi! I thought you had an assignment!"

"Hey, babe! We finished early, which was quite surprising, honestly."

The couple embraced and I barely registered the mushy love between the two as I watched the ginger man lead the rest of the group further into the bar. He walked by me, and before I knew it, dark blue eyes were staring right at me, eyebrows furrowed.

"The hell are you looking at?" he sneered and my face turned red, heart dropping in my chest.

"No one! I'm sorry!" I exclaimed, quickly turning back around and facing the bar.

"Tch. Whatever," the man only responded before walking off.

"You look like a cherry," Taichi said, clearly amused. I sent him a half-hearted glare, Keiko slapping his chest lightly.

"Be nice to her. She got fired today."

"Ohh, that sucks. If you need help-"

"She won't take it," Keiko said with a huff. "Stubborn ass."

I rolled my eyes at her, biting my lip nervously as I fiddled with my glass. "So uh... who was that guy? With the hat?"

Taichi blinked. "Oh, that's Chuuya Nakahara."

"Is he part of the Port Mafia?"

Taichi barked out a laugh, Keiko giggling softly behind her hand.

"Baby... he's an executive. Chuuya works closely with the leader of the Port Mafia."

"And I work under Chuuya," Taichi finished, amused at how wide my eyes have gotten at the answer.

"You mean to tell me... I pissed off... an executive member..." I was dismayed, heart pounding in my chest.

"Hmm, probably. Don't go home alone tonight," Taichi grinned as I balked, clearly having fun torturing me.

"Taichi! Babe, don't listen to him."

I gulped nervously, downing the rest of my drink before signaling to the bartender to get me another one.. "R-right..." Despite my better judgment, I turned my head, looking towards the obvious VIP section of the bar. Chuuya sat with some other grunts, a glass of what seemed to be red wine in his hand. Of course, his eyes found mines yet again and I whipped my head back around. Fuck, I did it again! I quickly downed the newly made drink, unaware of Chuuya's eyes narrowing as he watched me.

"Nooo, do you have to go?" a drunk Keiko whined as she latched onto my arm, a forever amused Taichi watching on. "Don't leave me with hiiiiiiim."

"I want to go home, dammit," I huffed, successfully peeling her off of me and handing her to her boyfriend. "I have to start job hunting tomorrow. Thank you for bringing me here, I do feel better and I love you but... I'm tired."

"Ugh, you are such an old lady!" Keiko whined again and I couldn't help but laugh, turning to start walking towards the exit.

"Goodnight, you too. Please get her home safe, Taichi."

"I wouldn't count on it~"

I rolled my eyes at his teasing, leaving the two behind as I left the bar. I stepped out into the cool night air, shivering a bit as I closed my cardigan tightly around me. I wore a simple but cute outfit; a black dress with burgundy tights underneath, black flats on my feet and my favorite tan cardigan over the entire outfit. It helped me fight off a bit of the cold, but as I started to walk down the block, I grabbed my phone to start searching through my usual rideshare app.

I didn't get far. My phone cluttered to the ground as it fell out my hands, a gasp leaving my mouth as I was slammed against the nearby brickwall of a narrow, dark alleyway.

"Who the fuck are you?" a familiar voice hissed and I'm shocked to find Chuuya Nakahara glaring daggers at me, his strong hands pinning my arms against the wall. He growled when I didn't answer. "Answer me! Who sent you here?!"

"N-No one!" I cried out, shaking like a leaf. Of course, of course I would be confronted by a fucking high level member of one of the most dangerous organizations in Japan. "I swear, I just came here with my friend."

Chuuya growled again and he flipped me around, pressing my front against the wall. "Stay still," he grunted, and my face started to heat up as I felt his gloved hands quickly feel along my body. He was frisking me, and I gulped when he shoved his hand under my dress, producing the knife I had strapped to my thigh.

"I carry that to protect myself," I immediately explained, Chuuya turning me around again to face him. His eyes were still narrowed, staring me down as if trying to figure out what the hell I was up to.

"And the bouncer didn't pat you down?" he questioned and I shook my head quickly.

"No, he didn't pat me or Keiko down."

"Tch, that's Taichi's woman," he said, though he still looked at me with narrow eyes, hesitating a bit before he turned my knife in his hand, handing it back to me hilt first. "You sure know how to make yourself look suspicious."

I cringed a bit as I strapped my knife to my thigh strap again. I missed how Chuuya's eyes lingered, him licking his lips. "That's my fault I... I know I was staring..." I could feel my face heat up again and I couldn't even look Chuuya in his face. "S-sorry if I creeped you out. I don't mean any harm. Keiko brought me here 'cause I got fired and she wanted to help me feel better..."

"Hm," was his only reply, crossing his arms over his chest. "What you do to fuck up?"

My mouth fell and I sputtered as I tried to come up with the words. "What do you mean?! I didn't fuck up!" I protested. "It literally came out of nowhere! I worked my ass off all year, only to get fired 'cause I wasn't what they needed anymore. Fucking bullshit."

Chuuya was amused by my little vent, snickering a bit as he gave me a quick look up and down. "I'm sure it wasn't your winning personality."

I scoffed. "Says the one that shoved a random woman against a wall?! That hurt, you bastard!"

Chuuya raised his eyebrows at me, and I immediately slapped my hands over my mouth.

Oh no. Fuck, I forgot who I was talking to.

Chuuya snickered again, his eyes flashing in amusement. He stepped closer to me, making me press back against the wall again. Chuuya leaned his face close to mine, a smug smirk on his face as he spoke.

"Be careful who you talk to like that," he hummed, and I shivered despite feeling some of his body heat. "Someone might just cut out your tongue for talking back like that. Me? Well, it'd be a waste, especially when I think of all the things I could make you do with it."

I squeaked, the heat never leaving my face as I stared at Chuuya with a puzzled expression on my face. The sudden switch up was giving me whiplash... and lowkey turning me on. "I..." I stuttered, looking away and finally noticing my phone still on the ground. "Crap, I hope it's not broken."

I rushed over to pick my phone up, ignoring Chuuya's hard stare on me. I looked over my phone, sighing in relief when I saw that it had sustained no damages.

Chuuya then stepped up to me, jerking his head back towards the bar before walking off. "Let me take you home. Take that as an apology for being so rough on you."

I blinked. "Um..."

"Hurry up!"

"Okay!" I squeaked and followed after the man quickly, chewing on my lip as I asked myself... what the fuck was I doing? Am I really about to get inside this man's car? He was a stranger! Who frisked me! Let alone, he is clearly a dangerous man.

I must be insane.

"Tell me," Chuuya started and I was dumbfounded as he approached a rather cool looking motorcycle. No way. "What the hell were you being so creepy for?" He turned to me and asked, an all-knowing smirk on his face. I blushed deeply. Of course, he already was able to figure it out once he realized that I wasn't a threat.

"No reason," I huffed out, earning a low laugh as Chuuya grabbed the only helmet I could see. I looked at him confused, gasping when he unceremoniously placed the helmet over my head. "What about you?"

"I don't need it," Chuuya simply answered before he finally mounted his bike. "Come on, you little liar. Hop on."

I couldn't help but stare, my mouth going dry as I took in the image of this handsome bastard with his bike. The engine roared as he turned it on, revving it a bit and making me make a mess in my panties.

"Hey, ya done eyefucking me, dollface?"

I sputtered. "I was NOT eyefucking you!" I stormed over to the bike, glaring at the grinning bastard as I climbed onto the bike behind him.

Chuuya snorted. "Yeah, like you weren't eyefucking me earlier in the bar," he retorted, easily reaching behind him to grab my wrists, pulling me against his back as he wrapped my arms around him. I was stunned silent, from his words, and his actions and the fact that his back felt so solid.... and he smelled so good...

"I was not..." I mumbled, pressing my cheek against his back. "Shut the fuck up."

He laughed darkly, and that sent a shiver down my spine.

"Where do you live?" Chuuya asked and I hesitantly told him my address. "I know where that is. Hold on."

"You do? It's on the other side of the city," I said and Chuuya just chuckled softly, looking over his shoulder and smirking at me.

"And who exactly runs this city?"

I clamped my mouth shut, his eyes staring into mine. I blushed and looked away from him. He turned his head back around with an amused laugh, the engine revving as he took off on his bike.

"Hold tight, dollface!"

He didn't have to tell me twice, my arms tightening around his torso as he sped down the street, weaving in and out of traffic. It was scary, but also so fucking exhilarating. My heart was thudding in my chest, my eyes watering because of the wind. Still, I kept them open, wanting to watch the world blur by us. Chuuya made a sharp, right turn, making me scream while he laughed loudly. 

"Man up!" he yelled at me.

"Stop driving like a crazy person!" I yelled back.

I didn't see the large, almost evil smirk that grew on Chuuya's face. Didn't see him licking his lips excitedly as he eyed a rather tall building coming up ahead.

"Tell me, dollface," he hollered back at me, revving the engine and I gulped as I held him tighter, his bike going faster. A bad feeling started to settle in my stomach, balking when he asked his next question. "Do you want to defy gravity?"

I didn't have time to answer, not when I finally realized that we were heading right towards the side of the building. I couldn't even scream, fear striking me as I suddenly started to see red, body jostling as Chuuya maneuvered the bike to jump in the air.... before landing perfectly on the side of the building and continuing vertically up towards the sky.

"Don't let go!" Chuuya sneered. Like that was ever going to happen.

I didn't dare turn my head to look down, my wide eyes staring up into the night sky as we made it closer to the top of the building. I couldn't even think straight, my body just running on nothing but adrenaline and fear.

"Ch-Chuuya!" I gasped out sharply, the bike finally making it to the roof of the building. Chuuya didn't slow down though, only barreling towards the edge and I started to panic. "Chuuya! What are you doing?!"

Chuuya only snickered, revving the engine once more before sending the bike flying off the edge of the building. I squeak and screw my eyes shut, pressing my face against the middle of his back. I didn't want to watch us plummet to our doom.

"Hey, idiot, open your eyes."

I whimpered and shook my head. "N-No..."

Chuuya sucked his teeth. "Just open your eyes! You'll regret it if you don't."

Biting my lip, I wanted a moment before I lifted my head up and opened my eyes, a small gasp leaving my mouth as I looked around me.

We were still floating in the air, biking moving through the sky. The City of Yokohama was lit up beautifully underneath us. I looked over, seeing the ocean at a distance, the ferris wheel lit up and spinning slowly. My mouth had fallen open, eyes wide in wonder. Chuuya was looking back at me, a triumphant grin on his face.

We made it to my apartment and Chuuya stood over me, an amused smile on his face as he watched me melt on the ground after I got off his bike.

"That was intense..." I mumbled, still feeling the effects of flying through the fucking sky. "I shouldn't even be surprised that you're gifted, with the power that you have already in the Port Mafia."

"Yeah, it was pretty great, huh," Chuuya said smugly, gloved hands stuffed in his coat pockets. I laughed softly, slowly standing up with my shaky legs. He took one look at my frazzled state and he grew even more smug. "That's a cute look on you, though if I really had my way with you, you wouldn't even be able to stand."

My face turned hot, sputtering as I tried to respond, but I had nothing to even say. Because the thought of actually inviting Chuuya inside and--

"Fuck..." I breathed out softly, looking at the man standing before me. His eyes didn't leave mine, the heat in them making a shiver go down my spine. "Do you... want to come inside?"

Chuuya fixed his hat on top of his head. "Lead the way, dollface."

"So... your ability lets you control gravity?" I asked once we made it inside the elevator of my apartment building. We were going fifteen stories up, after Chuuya parked his bike safely, of course.

"To put it simply, yes," Chuuya answered, stepping closer to me. I gasped softly when he grabbed my chin, the leather of his glove pressing against my skin. "But we're not here to talk about that." He pressed himself against me fully, leaning his face in until his lips hovered just above mine. I shivered, looking at him with hooded eyes. "This will be a one time thing, dollface."

I nodded, appreciating his honesty. "Of course," I replied just as the elevator stopped on my floor, doors sliding open. I grinned at him. "So let's make it count."

He liked the sound of that, grabbing my wrist and leading me out the elevator. I rushed to my apartment, grabbing my keys and hurriedly unlocking the door before opening it.

The door slammed shut as Chuuya immediately pressed me against it, his lips on mine in a fervorous kiss. I knocked his hat off his head as I ran my fingers through Chuuya's hair, moaning when his hands started to roam all over my body.

"Fuck..." I moaned softly when Chuuya started to kiss down my neck, squealing when he squeezed on my ass.

"Damn... you won't be able to fucking sit right, either," he growled against my neck as he massaged my ass and thighs. "Let's go."

Groaning when he moved himself away from me, I rushed to lead Chuuya to my bedroom, our clothes coming off in the process and making a trail on the floor.

It didn't take us too long to start really going at it, our lust fueling us to incredible heights. Chuuya held my hips tightly with his leather clad hands, thrusting his hard cock in and out of my soaking pussy.

He was fucking me hard, my body just sprawled on the bed as I moaned and grunted from the pleasure this man was giving me. "Fuck, fuck, Chuuya!" I whined, making the man grin widely as he kept his pace. Sweat covered both of our bodies, moans and deep growls mixing with the sound of skin slapping against skin.

"That's right, dollface, ride me," Chuuya smirked up at me, now on his back as I bounced up and down on his cock. His hands were right on my hips, his eyes going back and forth between  watching my bouncing breasts and watching his cock disappear inside my heat. "Fuck, you're so fucking sexy," he growled, thrusting up particularly hard and making me toss my head back, screaming when I finally fucking cum.

"Oh my God!" I gasped sharply, still squeezing around him as I began to slow down. "Oh fuck... it's so good," I moaned, reaching out and hooking my finger into Chuuya's black choker. I pulled and he pushed himself up, lips meeting mine in a messy kiss.

I moaned against his mouth, still slowly riding him as his hands ran up and down my sides, the leather cool against my skin. Then, Chuuya placed his hands on my hips, and with a mischievous little smirk, he licked his lips. Immediately, my body started to feel a little bit lighter, and Chuuya started to effortlessly bounce me up and down on his cock, 100% controlling my body with his ability.

"Chuuya..." I moaned his name, head lolling back. He continued to maneuver my body, little grunts and moans leaving his own mouth as he worked to reach his own pleasure, and mine.

I came again, tears falling down my face from the intense pleasure, and that was enough for Chuuya to pull me off of him completely, putting me on my knees before him on the bed. His hand grabbed the back of my neck and he pushed my head down, stuffing his cock in my mouth.

"Take it," he growled, his hands in my hair and using it to push my head up and down as he fucked my mouth. I moaned around him, a new wave of pleasure washing over me as I let the mafioso use me as he wanted. Soon enough, he exploded into my mouth, and I made sure I swallowed all of him.

"Fuck, that's hot..." Chuuya breathed out when I opened my mouth to show him that I did so. "You're such a good girl, dollface."

That made me flustered and I looked away shyly, earning a chuckle from him. I looked over when I felt him get up from the bed, thinking that he would leave. Instead, he just gave me a look. "Where is your shower?"

We showered together,  which took longer than needed because Chuuya couldn't keep his hands to himself. I was surprised when he climbed into bed with me afterwards, allowing me to cuddle against him as we slowly fell asleep.

I wasn't surprised though, when I woke up the next morning, sore and alone. I didn't get too upset about it, though. Chuuya laid it out clear and I accepted it and moved on.

I sat on my dining room table, looking through the newspaper as I sipped on my morning coffee. I was looking for a new job and figured looking at the local ads wouldn't hurt.

"Hm... let's see..." I whispered, reaching over and grabbing my knife. I ran the tip of it down the paper, stopping when one particular ad stuck out. "Hm... the Armed Detective Agency, huh? Interesting..." I set my knife down, staring at the ad as I took another careful sip of coffee.

-End

[mauesartetc]

I need some advice on a character design I've been working on. It's a Jester one but he just keeps looking like any other Jester char you tend to see: Face looks like a mask, Bright and colorful outfits w/ little to nothing on them that tells ya what their personality is . I want him to look unique & not fall into the generic jester design club. I want to show his personality added onto him so he doesn't look like generic. Are there any different ways to make jester characters look different and not look the same? (Esp with the mask as a face)

Well it's great you've already pinpointed the issues to avoid. When everyone else "zigs", that's when you "zag". Every other jester has a bright outfit? Maybe go more subtle with neutrals or earth tones and only use bright colors as accents. It might even match his sense of humor: While other jesters are zany and bombastic, maybe this guy's more low-key, sarcastic and deadpan. I've also noticed several jester designs with the same scrawny body type, so what if this one had some muscle tone or was a bit chubbier than most (depending on the type of athleticism required in his act)? Or what if this jester had lost a hand and still found creative, entertaining ways to juggle and play instruments? I'd watch the hell outta that guy.

There'll be some Google-fu involved here as well. Sometimes when we image search outfit ideas for characters from (or inspired by) certain time periods, we get lots of generic, cheap-looking Halloween costumes in the results. And cherry-picking from other people's designs won't help much either, as they're simply distilled versions of the real deal.

If you want to inspire a truly unique interpretation of a well-worn trope, you need to go to the source. And I mean the source.

When I searched "medieval art jester", these images were among the results. If no photos of the time period exist, ya get the next best thing. I'm sure some art historian in the comments will graciously point out any authenticity hiccups, but we're going for inspiration rather than pitch-perfect historical accuracy. I presume this isn't a live-action period drama we're talking about here.

It's interesting how all these fools' caps have ears on them, rather than the popular palm tree-esque jingle bell representation we're all used to seeing. The caps also culminate in single spires at the top, which is pretty different from your average, run-of-the-mill jester design.

And while we mainly observe characters' personalities through their poses and expressions, clothing choice is also a big piece of the puzzle. Since a jester's garb serves as a sort of uniform for his job, it must allow him to do it to the best of his abilities. For example, has he included a special feat in his act that requires unique accoutrements for his outfit?

As for conveying character traits, this is where symbols come into play. Let's say honesty is one of his main virtues. When you hear the word "honesty", what sorts of images come to mind?

Personally I remember that story about young George Washington confessing to chopping down his dad's cherry tree, saying "I cannot tell a lie". That reminds me of the physiological signs someone might be lying, such as a racing heart, flop sweat, and fidgety hands. The stress of being found out produces these effects, but if a person hardly ever lies, they don't have to deal with this kind of stress. That makes me think of the opposite of stress: Relaxation. And the image I picture when I think of relaxation is a sunny beach with soothing waves, the perfect vacation getaway.

(Photo by jcob nasyr on Unsplash)

I'd then incorporate the shapes and colors of the beach into the design. Just one example of how the logic often flows to unexpected places.

That's how I'd go about it. Hope that all makes sense. Good luck with your jester dude!