#( dialogue / robin scherbatsky )

[venustrape-arch]

@cagedpotential [ lily ] | sc

the last few days have been a downer. their little group has never felt so lifeless – pun definitely not intended. watching one of your closest friends go through a loss is as rough as it gets. & it's a whole new type of helplessness, knowing there's nothing you can do to put a positive spin on what he's going through. but she will agree the best thing marshall could be doing right now is stay back in minnesota & spend time with his family – the kind of people who are actually good at giving each other comfort through the rough patches in life. it hasn't been her experience, but she's well aware how close the eriksens are. in the meantime, she's been ridiculously focused on lily. the man she loves is in pain & that means she's in pain. feeling each other's every feeling is a lily & marshall specialty, after all. so, she's been at her back & call ; doing chores for her when she's too sad to move, sitting with her when the silence in her home is too much to handle. & this time, in utmost canadian fashion, she showed up with a box of doughnuts for good measure. " what ? i spend most of my work day looking at sandy's face, i need these as much as you do. " small smile pulls at her lips as she makes herself comfortable on the couch & pops open the box, finally ready to warm up. it'd been raining like a bitch & if ted were here, he'd say some crap about the universe being sad alongside all of them, but she brushes off the thought. " ready to eat our feelings ? "

[toomanyincorrectquotes]

Barney: robin is suspicious. and i, for one, do not want to wake up dead

Ted: i can’t believe i have to say this again: you cannot wake up and be dead

[venustrape-arch]

it's a warm & fuzzy feeling. it sneaks up on her every time she's reminded how much of a priority she is to her best friend, even when it's not exactly a life & death situation. though the whole code red thing was definitely created for exactly that. " okay, i might have overplayed the emergency card. but i'm feeling very strongly about this. " frustrated sigh out, she pushes the door closed & turns to lily, hands on hips. " it's not about ted – i mean, it kind of is, but only by extension. it's karen. " even with her new sleeping schedule, she's been seeing enough of ted's new old girlfriend to understand marshall & lily's strong opinions about her. not to mention that ted's pretentious side, often dialed back or just put in check by the rest of them, got so much worse since she's been around. it's making her violent. " look, i know we said we'd cool it with the interventions, but maybe it's time to break out the banner. if i have to hear one more rant about hockey players being barbaric every time she sees me wear my jersey around the house, i might actually prove her right. & do you know she's been throwing away our bread ?? she keeps replacing it with these cardboard tasting crackers, i think i cut my tongue on one ! "

✉️ ➡ @venustrape (robin scherbatsky), i'm so glad you made time to see me.

a tender grin fills lily's features with warmth, almost surprised by how much robin underestimated their bond and just what she could always expect of her. but, we all need a little reassurance sometimes, even hot news anchors with daddy issues: wait, that actually makes a lot of sense, now that she thought about it. ❝ of course i did, silly ― you're my best friend. you call, i jump first and ask questions later. ❞ her smile only grew bigger at the sweet confession, trusting robin wouldn't take it literally as maybe jumping off a bridge is where healthy friends draw the line, ❝ but, now that we're here, allow me to ask: what's the code red critical emergency? it has to do with ted, doesn't it? ❞

[smiletimeisrunningout]

ROLEPLAY HISTORY!

The rules are simple! Post characters you’d like to roleplay as, have roleplayed as, and might bring back. Then tag ten people to do the same (if you can’t think of ten, just write down however many you can and tag that number of people). Please repost, don’t reblog!

CURRENT MUSE(S):

here on smiletimeisrunningout but also previous blogs:

Emma since before 2012. Though she kinda counts like more than one muse considering she has several main universes and then adaptations to other shows lol

on my multi savingthrcw but they are all either severely canon divergent or even alternate universe versions or ocs, with only a few exceptions:

Sarah Walker (Chuck) (closest to canon)

Jenny II (Doctor Who)

Stella (oc)

Terra from (ff6)

AU Jemma Simmons (Agents of SHIELD)

Kate Austen (Lost)

Ana Lucia Cortez (Lost)

the Book and Tvshow versions of Alina Starkov (Grishaverse) (may sorta be put on hiatus soon because I didn't write them as soon as I added them and I feel I'm forgetting how I meant to write them lol)

Ellie Bartowski (Chuck) (like Sarah she's close to canon but has canon divergent verses)

Alex McHugh (Chuck) (like Ellie)

Solona Amell (DAO) modded player's character

Neria Surana (DAO), player's character

Lily Tabris (DAO) same as Neria

Ellana Lavellan (DAI) player's character

Lex (BG3) player's character

Tauriel (The Hobbit)

Rose Tyler (Doctor Who) Bad Wolfed version

Emma Swan but nearly closed (OUAT)

Clarke Griffin (The 100)

WANT TO WRITE:

(But will not write for sure because I don't have a grasp of 'historical' English language and I could never write the correct dialogue for them, and I'm not going to butcher canon characters making them speak in an unjustified modern way)

Penelope Featherington (Bridgerton)

Young Queen Charlotte (from Bridgerton universe)

Mary Woodhull (Turn WS)

Yennefer (The Witcher)

(But I will not write because I don't think I can channel them properly)

Inej Ghafa (Shadow and Bone tvshow)

Parker (Leverage)

Claire Littleton (Lost)

Daisy Johnson (AoS)

(And I might write)

ocs I'm picturing in my head

HAVE WRITTEN:

Bucky Barnes (MCU) around 2012 when characterization didn't really matter and we were tremendously ooc but having fun

Ruby and Belle from OUAT, same as Bucky

Maria Hill/Robin Scherbatski as mentioned above

oc inspired by Lara Croft

other versions of canon Emma Swan (OUAT)

Snow White and her mother Eva (OUAT)

Elizabeth Swann (POTC)

canon Jemma Simmons and more canon divergent versions with their own (surprisingly long lived) blogs

Britta Perry (Community)

Lily Evans (HP)

more that I have forgotten

WOULD WRITE AGAIN:

my oc Ada

tagged by: @honorhearted and @pagetreader tagging: @retrograderesemblance @writtenxbeginnings @annastrxng @hqlfbloods @trcstme @serpcntes @gccdstories @forthewinn and anyone who wants to jump in!

[cyarskj1899]

These quotes need to be studied in schools someday

X

TVLine

YEAR IN REVIEW

2022 in Review: Quotes of the Year!

By Team TVLine / December 18 2022, 9:00 AM PST

Best TV Quotes 2022

Courtesy of Prime Video; HBO; HBO Max; Netflix; Peacock

7

Anthony Bridgerton confessed his true feelings for Kate Sharma. This Is Us‘ Rebecca Pearson got well-deserved kudos. Viktor Hargreeves introduced himself to his Umbrella Academy siblings. And The White Lotus‘ Tanya McQuoid realized something very important… just a little too late.

All year long, we’ve been collecting TV’s best sound bites in our Quotes of the Week compilations, which honor the dialogue that made us laugh and cry — sometimes simultaneously. But as 2022 draws to a close, we’re now looking back at the Quotes of the Year, highlighting 60 of the funniest, most poignant or most wonderfully meta moments from the past 12 months.

Best TV Shows of 2022 | Stranger Things, The Boys, Andor, More

0 seconds of 3 minutes, 52 seconds

In the list below, you’ll find Robin Scherbatsky sharing her romantic past with How I Met Your Father‘s Sophie, Ellen DeGeneres reflecting on how much has changed since her talk show began, Westworld‘s Dolores-Hale uttering a powerful one-word command, and Andor‘s precious droid B2EMO lamenting a major loss.

Of course, some shows — like ABC’s Abbott Elementary and Netflix’s Stranger Things — were just too quotable this year to select only one line, so they’re among the series making multiple appearances on our list. And it’s not just the scripted fare that made our cut: Unscripted programs like American Idol, The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and Big Brother are in the mix, as well.

As with all of our year-end lists, we should issue a quick spoiler alert for several of this year’s plot twists, romantic confessions and heartbreaking sendoffs. But if you’re ready to dive in, peruse the list below, then drop a comment with the lines that would make your cut for Quotes of the Year.

HARRY POTTER 20TH ANNIVERSARY: RETURN TO HOGWARTS

Photo : HBO Max screenshot

“I killed you, didn’t I? I’m sorry. Had to be done.”

Helena Bonham Carter apologizes to Gary Oldman for what Bellatrix Lestrange did to Sirius Black in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

WOMEN OF THE MOVEMENT

Photo : ABC screenshot

“I want them to see what was taken from me.”

Mamie Till (Adrienne Warren), before the doors are opened for the public viewing of her son Emmett Till’s body

STATION ELEVEN

Photo : HBO Max screenshot

“You walked her home.”

Kirsten (Mackenzie Davis) assures Jeevan that his 20-year-old goal was met

OZARK

Photo : Netflix screenshot

“I shot your d—k off. For that, I apologize. I went to the drug store to look for a card. No such card exists.”

Darlene (Lisa Emery) takes the first step at burying the hatchet with Frank Jr.

GHOSTS

Photo : CBS screenshot

“I cannot believe Elias is back. Till death do us part — it’s right in the vows.”

Hetty (Rebecca Wisocky) laments the return of her dead husband

GHOSTS (Bonus Quote!)

Photo : CBS screenshot

“A travel agent booking other people’s holidays while going nowhere himself.”

“Hey, we went to Epcot, buddy! That’s the whole world all at once!”

Pete (Richie Moriarty) defends himself when the actor (Mathew Baynton) portraying him in a “Dumb Deaths” recreation says Pete was pathetic

THE GILDED AGE

Photo : HBO screenshot

“I may be a bastard, Mr. Thorburn, but you are a fool. And of the two, I think I know which I prefer.”

The women of The Gilded Age may be experts at throwing shade, but they’ve got nothing on literal robber baron George Russell (Morgan Spector)

THE RESIDENT

Photo : Fox screenshot

“Hi, Mommy.”

Gigi (Remington Blaire Evans), upon hearing her late mom Nic’s donated heart beating in another patient

9-1-1: LONE STAR

Photo : Courtesy of Fox

“I always imagine the world of politics to be really smart people walking briskly down corridors, talking real fast and all sort of sounding alike.”

In other words, Owen (Rob Lowe) learned everything he knows about the political world from watching himself on The West Wing

THE RIGHTEOUS GEMSTONES

Photo : HBO screenshot

“Look, I know you may be a backwoods simpleton, who scrubs her dresses on tree bark and stinks up the entire house with roadkill stew, but Godd—n if I wouldn’t miss the pitter-patter of your filthy-ass bare feet, or the way you chew shrimp tails with the ice like an animal — you’re family. And the thought of you running away on this bus right now is making my gooch pucker.”

Judy (Edi Patterson) pours her heart out to her aunt Tiffany to deter her from leaving town

ARTHUR

Photo : PBS screenshot (2)

“Hey, this shows you how to draw an aardvark! I never knew their noses were so long. Weird!”

It took 25 seasons, but Buster (voiced by Daniel Brochu) finally addressed the fact that Arthur looks nothing like an actual aardvark

GREY'S ANATOMY

Photo : ABC screenshot

“… and your plan was to leave without saying goodbye?”

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

“Because if I say goodbye to you, Grey, I might not actually leave.”

Meredith (Ellen Pompeo) and Cormac (Richard Flood), giving us a taste of what might have been

GREY'S ANATOMY (Bonus Quote!)

Photo : ABC screenshot

“When Leo said that he was an owl, did you feel the need to call him silly and correct him?”

“No.”

“No. You just loved him. You just let him explore. Let’s just love Leo, Teddy. Let’s listen when he tells us who he is.”

Regardless of Leo’s gender identity, Owen (Kevin McKidd) refuses to let himself and Teddy (Kim Raver) become the child’s bully

SNOWFALL

Photo : FX screenshot

“Little late for this, but I’m sorry for shooting you and all. I’m glad you… didn’t not make it.”

Stripper-turned-hitwoman Black Diamond (Christine Horn) awkwardly apologizes to Louie for trying to kill her last season

THE GOOD DOCTOR

Photo : ABC screenshot

“Let’s run her bandit ass out of town.”

Dr. Audrey Lim (Christina Chang) vows to take Salen Morrison down, once and for all

HOW I MET YOUR FATHER

Photo : Hulu screenshot (2)

“I once had a guy who said, ‘I love you’ on our first date.”

“Wow, you win! Dude sounds like a real piece of work.”

“You have no idea. But a good piece of work.”

Robin (Cobie Smulders) recalls her very first date with Ted

BRIDGERTON

Photo : Netflix screenshot

“You are the bane of my existence… and the object of all my desires.”

Anthony (Jonathan Bailey) breathlessly tells Kate how he truly feels for her, despite being engaged to her sister Edwina

THE 94TH ACADEMY AWARDS

Photo : ABC screenshot

“I’ve been getting out of that Spider-Man costume. Did I miss anything? There’s, like, a different vibe in here.”

Co-host Amy Schumer masterfully eases the tension after Will Smith’s now-infamous slap of Chris Rock

THE WALKING DEAD

Photo : AMC screenshot (2)

“[Hershel] doesn’t exactly trust me, you know.”

“But I’m starting to.”

Negan (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) and Maggie (Lauren Cohan) reach a turning point as she asks her husband’s killer to babysit their son

THE WONDER YEARS

Photo : ABC screenshot

“Gwendolyn, but he called her Winnie.”

Bruce (Spence Moore II) reveals the reimagining’s unexpected connection to the OG series — that his friend Brian, who died in the Vietnam War, is also Winnie Cooper’s brother — and breaks our hearts in the process

ABBOTT ELEMENTARY

Photo : ABC screenshot

“Let me see these permission slips to the zoo, and they better be real, ’cause I can tell if you faked a Herbie Hancock.”

“Oh, it’s John Hancock.”

“Girl, I know. I just say whatever I want.”

Ava (Janelle James) doesn’t play by the rules

ABBOTT ELEMENTARY (Bonus Quote!)

Photo : ABC screenshot

“We’ve watched Nightmare Before Christmas but only the Christmas parts, Practical Magic without the witchcraft and Hocus Pocus without Sarah Jessica Parker.”

Barbara (Sheryl Lee Ralph) describes her church’s Halloween movie screening tradition

KILLING EVE

Photo : BBC America screenshot

“I did it, Eve.”

“Don’t you mean ‘we did it’?”

“Yeah. But mostly me.”

Villanelle (Jodie Comer) lets Eve (Sandra Oh) know she’s taking the credit for taking down The Twelve

AMERICAN IDOL

Photo : ABC screenshot

“Noah, I feel like maybe you should Wikipedia me.”

Katy Perry, famously an ex-girlfriend of John Mayer’s, balks at Noah Thompson’s suggestion that Perry picked a Mayer song for him to sing

GIRLS5EVA

Photo : Peacock screenshot

“#AlbumMode is a state of mind that started when our deal was announced and ends when I’m at the Met Gala in a catheter because my dress is too complicated.”

Wickie (Renée Elise Goldsberry) has a very clear vision of how the girls’ new album release will play out

STATION 19

Photo : ABC screenshot

“My name is Matt, Mom. This is me. I’m sad for you. I’m sad that you don’t want to get to know me or the man that I’ll become. I’m sad that you’re going to miss out on loving me when I feel the most me.”

“But honey, I love you… I’m trying to save you. Honey, you’re a child. You don’t know what’s good for you.”

“I know that when you call me Mary, it makes me want to die. Do you think me wanting to die is good for me, Mom?”

Whether his mom (Romy Rosemont) wants to hear it or not, transgender youth Matt (Hollidae Livingston) speaks his truth

YOUNG SHELDON

Photo : CBS screenshot

“Wow. I might look too cool.”

Sheldon’s (Iain Armitage) first graphic tee is a total game-changer

THIS IS US

Photo : Courtesy of NBC

“You’re as tough as they come, Rebecca Pearson. And you, my dear, have earned a rest.”

Dr. K (Gerald McRaney) gives Rebecca one last (sniff!) pep talk

THE ELLEN DEGENERES SHOW

Photo : Warner Bros. TV Distribution (2)

“When we started the show, I couldn’t say ‘gay.’ I was not allowed to say ‘gay.’ I say it at home a lot — you know, ‘What are we having for our gay breakfast?’ or ‘Pass the gay salt,’ or ‘Has anyone seen the gay remote?’ — but we couldn’t say ‘gay.’ I couldn’t say ‘we’ because that would imply that I was with someone. Sure couldn’t say ‘wife,’ and that’s because it wasn’t legal for gay people to get married. Now I say ‘wife’ all the time.”

During her last show, DeGeneres acknowledges how much has changed since 2003 — and calls attention to wife (and front-row audience member) Portia de Rossi

STRANGER THINGS

Photo : Netflix screenshot

“I don’t want to talk about it. I’ll punch you so hard in your face that your teeth’ll fall back out.”

“Whoa. Too far.”

Steve (Joe Keery) instantly regrets the way he tells Dustin (Gaten Matarazzo) to stop pointing out his lingering feelings for ex Nancy

STRANGER THINGS (Bonus Quote!)

Photo : Netflix screenshot

“You’ve grown.”

“You shrank.”

Reunited, Mike (Finn Wolfhard) and Hopper (David Harbour) compare the effects of adolescence vs. the Kamchatka diet

THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY

Photo : Netflix screenshot

“Who elected you, Vanya?”

“It’s, uh, Viktor.”

“Who’s Viktor?”

“I am. It’s who I’ve always been.”

Viktor Hargreeves (Elliot Page) introduces himself to his siblings for the first time

OBI-WAN KENOBI

Photo : Disney+ screenshot

“I am not your failure, Obi-Wan. You didn’t kill Anakin Skywalker — I did.”

Darth Vader (Hayden Christensen), reinforcing what Ben Kenobi tells Luke Skywalker in A New Hope — that Vader did, indeed, kill his father

THE BOYS

Photo : Prime Video screenshot

“How long have you been f—king it behind my back?”

“OK, it’s not an ‘it.’ It’s a ‘her.’ Get your pronouns right.”

Cassandra (Katy Breier) and The Deep (Chace Crawford) discuss his relationship with Ambrosius the octopus

TYLER PERRY'S SISTAS

Photo : BET screenshot

“Bitch, you’re f—king Black Panther and Eddie Murphy all rolled into one?!”

In case you couldn’t tell, Danni (Mignon) is pretty excited about Sabrina dating an African prince

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF BEVERLY HILLS

Photo : Bravo screenshot

“2020 was bad for a lot of people, but I also think it was kind of like a spiritual awakening. This is going to sound crazy, but I made peace with my vagina.”

“Were you at war with your vagina?”

Not to discredit Sheree Zampino’s epiphany, but Dorit Kemsley poses a valid follow-up question

EVIL

Photo : Paramount+ screenshot

“Boop.”

During her hearing, Sister Andrea (Andrea Martin) subtly reminds Dr. Boggs that he knows firsthand how present demons can be in the world

THE ORVILLE

Photo : Hulu screenshot (2)

“I enjoy spending time with you. You are a male, and yet you possess many prominent female traits. Which I find appealing.”

“Oh.”

Topa (Imani Pullum) puts her crush on Gordon (Scott Grimes) into (awkward) words

BETTER CALL SAUL

Photo : AMC screenshot (inset: Everett Collection)

“Crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy: Fifty-year-old high school chemistry teacher comes into my office. The guy is so broke he can’t pay his own mortgage. One year later, he’s got a pile of cash as big as a Volkswagen. That’s crazy!”

Gee, to whom could Gene (Bob Odenkirk) be referring…?

WESTWORLD

Photo : Courtesy of HBO

“Chair!”

Dolores-Hale (Tessa Thompson), the “bored” god, summons herself a place to sit

WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS

Photo : FX screenshot

“Trust me: Gay is in. Gay is hot. I want some gay. Gay it’s gonna be.”

Laszlo (Matt Berry) thinks faking a relationship with Nandor is a sure-fire way to get Colin into private school

LAST WEEK TONIGHT WITH JOHN OLIVER

Photo : HBO screenshot

“We let the [monkeypox] vaccine sit unused on a shelf in our reserves like an expired Chobani — or a $90 million movie on HBO Max. By the way, hi there, new business daddy! Seems like you’re doing a really great job. I do get the vague sense that you’re burning down my network for the insurance money, but I’m sure that that’ll all pass.”

THE BACHELORETTE

Photo : ABC screenshot (2)

“Tino’s being a real baby back bitch.”

Ethan accidentally comes up with an alternate jingle for Chili’s while slamming his romantic rival

HARLEY QUINN

Photo : HBO Max screenshot

“I don’t trust clowns with secrets.”

“I am barely clown-themed anymore. I just think I look hot like this. I mean, check out how good these booty shorts make my ass look, right? [Off Bruce’s confused look] Never mind, you’re 8.”

Harley (voiced by Kaley Cuoco) tries to earn a young Bruce Wayne’s trust

ROSWELL, NEW MEXICO

Photo : The CW screenshot

“I think I might just take these as a reminder of my time in Roswell. … Fits like a glove!”

Seeing Allie (played by Shiri Appleby, aka the Liz of the original Roswell series) put on that alien headband was a full-circle moment we won’t soon forget

74TH PRIMETIME EMMY AWARDS

Photo : Kevin Winter/Getty Images

“When I was a little girl, all I wanted to see was me in the media: someone fat like me, Black like me, beautiful like me. If I could go back and tell little Lizzo something, I’d be like, ‘You’re going to see that person, but bitch, it’s going to have to be you.’”

THE GOOD FIGHT

Photo : Paramount+ screenshot

“Mother f—ker. Oh, I’m sorry, you didn’t hear that? Mother f—ker. F—k you and your moronic defund the police bulls—t. Why? Because you’re putting Trump back into the White House, you stupid f—kin’ tai-t lick. You never heard me swear before? Well, aren’t you in for a treat.”

After six seasons of watching his mouth on CBS’ The Good Wife, legendarily blunt political strategist Eli Gold (Alan Cumming) wastes no time taking his pent-up potty mouth for a spin in the Paramount+ spinoff

BLOOD & TREASURE

Photo : Paramount+ screenshot (2)

“So we are saying ‘Jeng-his’ now.”

“She does.”

“It’s the right way!”

Chuck (Mark Gagliardi) points out the Season 2 characters’ different pronunciations of Genghis Khan’s name

BIG BROTHER

Best TV Quotes

Photo : Courtesy of CBS

“Monte may have more blood on his hands than me, but as someone who has sat on this eviction block six times on eviction night, I have bled out the most in this game. But I have bandaged myself together every single time and gotten up and continued to fight, because like so many other women in the world, that is what we have to do to get to the end… I have overcome so much in this game, and I have come to understand that I am not a shield, I am a sword. I am not a victim, I am a victor… Jury members, I am challenging you to make the hard decision and change the course of this game. Choose progress for the course of this game. I can be the winner of this season, and I promise you will not do it in vain if you choose me tonight.”

Taylor clinches the game-winning vote with her epic final plea to the jurors

CHICAGO P.D.

Best TV Quotes

Photo : NBC screenshot

“You’re the love of my life, and if I’m yours, then you’ll know that you have to let me go.”

Halstead (Jesse Lee Soffer), breaking our hearts in his tearful goodbye to wife Upton

SHE-HULK: ATTORNEY AT LAW

Photo : Disney+ screenshot

“That’s what Hulks do. We smash things. Bruce smashes buildings, I smash fourth walls and bad endings… and sometimes Matt Murdockkkk.”

Jen (Tatiana Maslany) reminds K.E.V.I.N. of her particular set of skills

THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE RINGS OF POWER

Photo : Prime Video screenshot

“When in doubt, Elanor Brandyfoot, always follow your nose.”

The Stranger (Daniel Weyman), giving off serious Gandalf vibes while leading the way for his new adventure with Nori

HOUSE OF THE DRAGON

Photo : HBO screenshot

“He can keep his tongue.”

Before King Viserys can cut out Vaemond’s tongue for publicly questioning Rhaenyra’s sons’ parentage, Daemon (Matt Smith) slices the accuser’s skull in two — but leaves the offending appendage attached

THE HANDMAID'S TALE

Photo : Hulu screenshot

“Hi, June.”

“Hi, Serena.”

“You got a diaper?”

Serena (Yvonne Strahovski) and June (Elisabeth Moss) are in the same boat — er, train — at the end of the Season 5 finale

CHUCKY

Photo : Syfy screenshot

“You think I’m scared to go to hell? F—k that. I’m from Jersey… Jersey!”

Chucky (voiced by Brad Dourif) doesn’t have much love for his home state, it seems

ANDOR

Photo : Disney+ screenshot

“I d-d-don’t want to be alone. I want M-M-Maarva.”

B2EMO (voiced by Dave Chapman) isn’t ready to mourn

CRIMINAL MINDS: EVOLUTION

Photo : Paramount+ screenshot

“You’ve never pulled your gun in the line of duty, have you? Never faced down a psychopath…. You’re a hedge fund manager with a badge.”

Prentiss (Paget Brewster) calls ’em — in this case, FBI Deputy Director Bailey — as she sees ’em

TITANS

Photo : HBO Max screenshot

“This is insane.”

“Compared to what? Two hours ago I was in [Conner’s] stomach trying to kill a ghost snake.”

“And two hours before that we were fighting zombies.”

“And I kissed Bernard.”

Tim (Jay Lycurgo) experienced a different kind of pre-fall finale action

YELLOWSTONE

Photo : Paramount Network screenshot

“How ya feeling?”

“Like I got hit by a truck. How about you?”

“Like I got hit by a Prius.”

Beth (Kelly Reilly) offers Summer (Piper Perabo) faint praise the morning after their brawl

THE WHITE LOTUS

Best TV Quotes

Photo : HBO screenshot

“These gays! They’re trying to murder me!”

Tanya (Jennifer Coolidge) has an unintentionally hilarious lightbulb moment about the men with whom she’s been spending her Sicilian vacation

[bobasheebaby]

125 How I Met Your Mother Prompts

More prompts this one is mega long but broken up by character. I think it’s a pretty good mix of funny and angsty. Break at 15.

Barney Stinson

1 “You know what NAME needs to do. He needs to stop being sad. When I get sad, I stop being sad, and be awesome instead. True story.”

2 “A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth.”

3 “ It's going to be legen...wait for it...and I hope you're not lactose-intolerant cause the second half of that word is...dairy!”

4 “Suit up!”

5 “Believe it or not, I was not always as I am today.”

6 “I realized that I'm searching, searching for what I really want in life. And you know what? I have absolutely no idea what that is.”

7 “Every Halloween, I bring a spare costume, in case I strike out with the hottest boy/girl at the party. That way, I have a second chance to make a first impression.”

8 “Whatever you do in this life, it’s not legendary unless your friends are there to see it.”

9 “Three days. We wait three days to call a man/woman, because that's how long Jesus wants us to wait... True story.”

10 “There’s three rules of cheating: 1. It’s not cheating if you’re not the one who’s married. 2. It’s not cheating if his/her name has two adjacent vowels. 3. And it's not cheating if he’s/she’s from a different area code.”

11 “I peed in an alley which happened to have a church which I did not see because I was drunk.”

12 “I'm such a mess. Why do you even like me?” “I guess, because you're almost as messed up as I am.”

13 “In my body, where the shame gland should be, there is a second awesome gland. True story.”

14 “Do you have some puritanical hang up on prostitution? Dude, it’s the world’s oldest profession.”

15 “Here’s the mini-cherry on top of the regular cherry on top of the sundae of awesomeness that is my life.”

16 “God, it’s me, NAME. What up? I know we don’t talk much, but I know a lot of guys/girls call out your name because of me.”

17 “Okay, pep talk! You can do this, but to be more accurate, you probably can’t. You’re way out of practice and he’s/she’s way too hot for you. So, remember, it’s not about scoring. It’s about believing you can do it, even though you probably can’t. Go get ‘em, tiger!”

18 “De — wait for it — nied! Denied! We’re goin’ out tomorrow night.”

19 “Step six is called purg— wait for it. Keep waiting. Keep waiting for all of eternity only to discover that there’s no escape —atory.”

20 “I think tonight is going to be de — wait for it — lightful.”

21 “Ted, tonight is gonna be — wait for it — dary! Wait, no, that’s not it. How do I usually say it?”

22 “You watch, NAME, tonight is going to be legen— it’s the night we stole a camel! Which means it will be full of drama —dary.”

23 “I’m just gonna grab this star to put on top of the tree. It’s gonna be legend— wait for it —merry.”

24 “Haaaave you met NAME?”

25 “Challenge accepted!”

Robin Scherbatsky

26 “Oh, come on, ref! I haven't seen that much hooking go unpunished since my last trip to Vegas.“

27 “Just be yourself. Say something nice.” “Which one? I can't do both.”

28 “Before you know it, you'll be marrying a man/woman who once ate a vanilla-scented candle!” “That was on me. I shouldn't have left it in the kitchen. Though, it was lit. Man, he/she dumb.”

29 “Destined? Aren't you tired of waiting for destiny, NAME? Isn't it time to make your own destiny?“

30 “NAME was great.” “Exactly, and you threw it all away to chase after some hot piece of ass.” “You mean you?” “Thank you!”

31 “Oh, we're busting apple bags? I can bust apple bags.“

32 “NAME, I am not ready for them to find out about us.” “Then you're gonna have to stay in there for the entire trilogy. Don't worry, it's only 382 minutes.” “Nerd!”

33 “You know NAME? Been thinking about it. Guess it's kind of nice you're such a bad-ass.” “It's pretty bad-ass you're so nice, NAME.”

34 “14 seconds! And already some dingdong is stepping up, thinking he can get some of this broke off.”

35 “But timing is a bitch.”

36 “Well, maybe this isn't a breakup. Maybe this is two friends getting back together.“

37 “There's something between us. Maybe my head was saying, 'nip it in the bud', because my heart was saying something else ...”

38 “I just finished a seven-day cleanse.” “I thought you just started that yesterday.” “I finished early, okay?”

39 “NAME! I just had a great idea!” “Oh, do whatever you want to me, just don't wake me up.”

40 “Okay, I've missed you. Not in a 'we're gonna make out' way, not even in an 'I forgive you' way. Just in an 'I've missed you' way.”

41 “I may not love you the way you love me, but I do love you.”

42 “But ... umm.”

43 “Why am I constantly looking for reasons not to be happy?”

44 “Oh, that’s right. I’m alone.”

45 “I’m gonna give you summer teeth ... some’re here, some’re there.”

46 “You can’t run back to the past because it’s familiar.”

47 “Nobody asked you, NAME.”

48 “It’s one thing to not want something. It’s another to be told you can’t have it.”

49 "I am never going to have closure. Okay, closure doesn't exist."

50 “You are going to miss out on something great.”

Ted Mosby

51 "If you're not scared then you're not taking a chance. And if you're not taking a chance, then what the hell are you doing anyway?"

52 “You can ask the universe for signs all you want but ultimately we'll only see what we want to see...when we're ready to see it.”

53 "Nothing good happens after 2:00 am… when 2:00 am rolls around, just go home and go to sleep."

54 "The more you fight it, the worse it’s gonna get. It’s like when your car slides on ice, you steer into the skid."

55 "Sorry, Peter. We're grown ups now, we can't fly to Nevrland with you anymore."

56 "I wound up shame-eating the whole pizza. I woke up all greasy and sweaty. My sheets looked like what they wrap deli sandwiches in. Maybe I should join a gym. Do you go to a gym?"

57 "People make fun of the guy/girl who stays home every night doing nothing, but the truth is that guy/girl is a genius.”

58 “Love doesn't make sense! You can't logic your way into or out of it. Love is totally nonsensical. But we have to keep doing it or else we're lost and love is dead, and humanity should just pack it in. Because love is the best thing we do.”

59 “Everyone has an opinion on how long it takes to recover from a breakup.”

60 “There are a lot of little reasons why the big things in our lives happen.”

61 “There are two big days in any love story: the day you meet the guy/girl of your dreams and the day you marry him/her.”

62 ““I’m crazy about you. I think we should be together. What do you say?” “Yes. No. Maybe.” “Those are the three options.”

63 “The littlest thing can cause a ripple effect that changes your life.”

64 “It's kind of insane how much happened in just a day and a half.”

65 “Whether a gesture's charming or alarming, depends on how it's received.”

66 “Because sometimes even if you know how something's gonna end that doesn't mean you can't enjoy the ride.”

67 “Shouldn't we hold out for the person who doesn't just tolerate our little quirks but actually kinda likes them?”

68 “I used to be in such a hurry all the time. Everything was so urgent. Now I figured, if it's going to happen it'll happen when it happens. I'm not going anywhere, he’s/she's not going anywhere. What's the rush, right?”

69 “I think for the most part if you're really honest with yourself about what you want out of life, life gives it to you.”

70 “We spend so much effort trying to keep parts of our lives hidden, even from our closest friends, that in those rare times when we do open up, it's amazing how minor those secrets all end up being.”

71 “You may think your only choices are to swallow your anger or throw it in someone's face, but there's a third option: You can just let it go, and only when you do that is it really gone and you can move forward.”

72 “I'm sorry, when I'm excited I abbreviate words I shouldn't.”

73 “We gotta wait for the real thing, no matter how tough it gets.”

74 “When you believe in people, people come through.”

75 “If you love something, you can never let it go. Not even for a second. Or it's gone forever.“

76 “Hey ref! Check your voicemail, I think you've missed a few calls!“

77 “Turns out, when you projectile vomit on skates, you roll right into the spray.“

78 “NAME, if you asked a hundred people: 'Who's the worst person you could possibly date?' They'd all say 'your therapist', except the ones saying 'NAME'.”

79 “Sometimes our best decisions are the ones that don't make any sense at all.“

80 “We've always been a trio! We're right up there with Batman and Robin and Alfred. Romeo and Juliet and the apothecary. Salt and pepper and cumin.“

Lily Aldrin

81 “You guys dated before. That time counts. The clock doesn't reset to zero. It un-pauses from where you left off.”

82 “We struggle so hard to hold on to these things that we know are gonna disappear eventually. And that’s really noble.”

83 “You can’t just skip ahead to where you think your life should be.”

84 “I know it's a mistake, but there are certain things in life where you know it's a mistake but you don't really know it's a mistake because the only way to really know it's a mistake is to make the mistake and look back and say 'yep, that was a mistake.' So really, the bigger mistake would be to not make the mistake, because then you'd go your whole life not knowing if something is a mistake or not.”

85 “Yes, I'm in a rotten mood. No, I don't want to talk about it. Yes, this has booze in it. No, it's not my first.”

86 “The 'no more surprises'-thing is the best part of being married.”

87 “So, what do you want to do tonight? Drink ourselves blind, set a car on fire? Oh, watch a movie that doesn't start with a desk lamp jumping on top of a capital 'I'?”

88 “Baby, you're like 20 slutty chicks all rolled into one.” “Sweet-talk is not gonna change my mind!”

89 “So this is what you guys do? You invite other couples over for dinner, to judge them and feel superior?” “Oh, grow up, NAME, that's why any couple invites anyone over ever!”

90 “I think my soul just threw up a little bit.“

91 “Your heart's talking to you, NAME. Do you have the guts to listen to it?”

92 “I don't care if the dishes aren't done, okay? If you care, you do it.” “Great, then I don't care if you have an orgasm. If you care, you do it.”

93 “Who wants hot-wings?” “I'm in... or maybe we should just pour hot-sauce on NAME, since he's/she’s a total chicken.”

94 “I hate how you're always right.” “It's my best, and most annoying, trait.“

95 “Sex now, we'll do the foreplay after.“

96 “NAME check it! Three blond babies drinking bad-decision-juice at eight o'clock.”

97 “If you keep lying to me, if you keep cutting me out of decisions, if you keep using words like winning and losing when you talk about our marriage, you are going to lose me.”

98 “Why not just say goodbye to the bad things?”

99 “Say goodbye to all the times you felt lost, to all the times it was a no instead of a yes, to all the scrapes and bruises, to all the heartache.”

100 “Where’s the poop, NAME? Where’s the poop?”

Marshall Eriksen

101 “Hey I have given up peeing in the shower for you!”

102 “Why does he/she keep doing this? He meets them. He/She likes them way too much. He/She goes way too big too soon. He/She ends up blowing it. I can't take this any more. He's/She’s fallen in love so many times now.”

103 “Ow! Paper cut ... Death is all around us.”

104 “This is a pie chart describing my favorite bars. And this is a bar graph describing my favorite pies.”

105 “It's a little late but WHAT THE BALLS IS THIS?”

106 “Hey baby, it's me. Can you bail me out of jail? I thought I saw big foot in Central Park so I tackled him. But it turned out to be Russell Brand.”

107 “Being in a relationship is hard. And committing, making sacrifices it's hard. But if it's the right person, it's easy. Looking at that guy/girl, and knowing he’s/she's all you really want out of life, that should be the easiest thing in the world. And if it's not like that then he’s/she's not the one.”

108 “Here's the thing, NAME. I'm snuggly. You're not. Who wouldn't want to snuggle up next to this business on a Sunday morning? Wrapped in comfort and it's raining outside and there's muffins warming in the oven. I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.”

109 “He’s:She's never seen Star Wars?! NAME, the only people in the universe who haven't seen Star Wars are the characters in Star Wars. And that's cause they lived them, NAME! That's cause they lived the Star Wars.”

110 “Love died. The love that made you all believe in love, that's dead now.”

111 “I’ve never asked NAME to do anything ‘no questions asked’ because I never wanted to. He’s/She’s the love of my life. I never keep anything from him/her.”

112 “Happy Slapsgiving!”

113 “This is what I miss about being in a couple. I always had someone to go to concerts with, or farmer's market, or brunch. God, I miss brunch!” “Well, I guess you could - well, you could try going to brunch alone.” “Oh, you don't think I've tried?” [FLASHBACK]  “Table for one.” “One... Couple?” “Um, no, just me.” “Really? For brunch?” “You're right. Who am I kidding?” [Leaves restaurant. End of Flashback] “Oh, the Popover Pantry! That place is great. Can we go get brunch tomorrow?” “Of course, sweetie.” “Can I go with you guys?” “Really? For brunch?”

114 “That’s life, you know. We never end up where you thought you wanted to be.”

115 “That cake. Best cake I ever had. Seriously, my stomach was like, ‘Hey bro, I don’t know what you’re eating cause I don’t have any eyes but it’s basically awesome, so keep sending it down Gullet Alley.’”

116 “Revenge fantasies never work out the way you want.”

117 “I’m a good boyfriend/girlfriend in my sleep.”

118 “You have to let me dance my own battles.”

119 “One good deed leads to another and another.”

120 “Look at us, riding around in a limo, eating hot dogs…it’s like we’re the president.”

121 “All hail beercules!”

122 “I don’t know what to do with my hands. What do I normally do with my hands?”

123 “Hey, baby.” “We hate NAME now. Get on board or the sexting stops.” “NAME’s a son of a bitch!”

124 “Are these chicken wings or angel wings? God, I love these things.”

125 “Oh, and you think you can step up to me? To me?!”

[milkqndrem]

Dialogue Prompts as HIMYM Quotes

"Just be yourself. Say something nice." "Which one? I can't do both."

"You know how we've been trying to find new couple friends since [friend] and [friend's ex], [friend] and [another ex], [friend] and [a different ex]... Geez, [friend], when will you get your life together?"

"You dumped a porn star? Friendship over. FRIENDSHIP. OVER!"

*seductively* "Who's your daddy?" "Who's your daddy?" *crying* "I don't know!"

"Robin, just... I appreciate your help, but there's a reason your name is Robin, not Batman."

"Dude, do not pretend you're not the kind of guy who keeps a list of all the girls he slept with." Person B: "I have one. It's called my marriage license."

"Do you want to have dinner with me Saturday night?" "Actually, I'm getting married on Saturday." "... Friday night?"

"You live in [state name], right? I could swing by and pick you up." "Okay, first of all, my parents live in [state name], I live in the moment."

[Animal]s don't get married, [Name]." "Like you could possibly know that."

"I got us all in the club Okay!" "Okay?! Awesome!" "What's going on? Did I just have a stroke?"

"What happened to that cutlet you were grinding with all night?" *nervous* "That was my cousin, [name]."

"Wow, who knew being in a committed heterosexual relationship could make a guy so gay?"

[Name], do you believe in fate?" "I believe you're about to give a big speech on fate."

"I finally found The One, [name], and her name is [food name]."

"Where does this girl/guy live?" "We're talking about a man/woman who actually got [full name] to commit. I'm guessing [fictional land/village/city]."

"[Name], I can't get married!" "Yes you can, you love him/her!" "You're right, I do, thanks [name]!"

"I just want to say, from the bottom of my heart, I'm going to kill you."

"Oh, [name]'s got feelings for a girl/boy." "Yeah, penis feelings!"

"I can't go, I got this thing." "What thing?" "A penis/vagina."

NOBODY ASKED YOU, [name]!"

"I'm pregnant." "Are you sure you're not just getting fat?" *person A punches Person B*

"She's/he's never seen [well-known movie]? [Name], the only people who haven't seen [said movie] are the characters in [movie]. That's 'cause they lived them, [name]! They lived the [movie name]!"

"A hug is just like a public dry hump." "I think you're hugging wrong."

"I could stand to do something stupid." "I'm something stupid. Do me."

"Did it hurt?" "What? "Getting that kid's nose surgically removed from your ass?"

"Get that camera out of my face before I flip you like a cheese omelet."

"Oh my gosh, guys, we have to rush [name] to the hospital because, somehow, she/he swallowed his/her vocal cords and they got lodged in her/his rectum because she's/he's talking out of her/his ass."

*packing house* "Whoa, [name], that thing is way too big to fit in that box." "Yeah, that's what your mom/dad said." "How dare you!" "No, He/She actually said that."

*Happily* "We've only had sex with each other." "We've only had sex with each other." *sadly* "They've only had sex with each other..."

"Come with me if you want to bang."

"That Halloween when we decided to go as the [fictional gang from show/movie], but failed to coordinate our costumes."

"Hey, [name]. Ask me if the Abdominal Snowman called." "Has the Abdominal Snowman called?" "Not Yeti."

"I'm a vegan. I wish I could tune out that moral voice inside me that says eating animals is murder, but I guess I'm not as strong as you are." "That's because you need protein."

"You see what I got going on here? They're turkeys, but they're also hands, because later, we're gonna eat turkey... And I'm going to slap you in your face."

"I've been trying to tell you this for years; your bacon allergy is a lie, your mother made it up so you'd eat healthy as a kid." "No, I'm just allergic to alot of stuff! Bacon, doughnuts.. halloween candy... Not saying 'thank you'... Oh my god!"

"With great penis comes great responsibility."

"That was not cool, [name]." Other (pregnant) Person: "Contraction!" "That... Wasn't cool [name]?"

"Ow! Paper cut! Death... Is all around us."

"What are you doing here?" "Oh, just the lord's work." "But... You're Satan."

[cinepun]

How I Met Your Mother (2005–2014)

[thosedamnsmoshkids]

15, 62 and 98!

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

i read ‘boy erased’ this year for ap lang and....that book made me SOB because it’s good and gay and really sad

62. seven characters you relate to?

OOOF ALRIGHT HERE WE GO LETS SEE IF I CAN DO THIS

patrick jane - the mentalist - a quirky, funny dude who is super loyal to his friends but dances to the beat of his own drum if he has to. im love himmmm

scout master ward - moonrise kingdom - he goes from a little bit of a push-over who doesn’t know what he’s doing, to a solid hero who still doesn’t know what he’s doing. and his girlfriend’s adorable.

joan watson - elementary - i went into elementary with an elitist sherlock view, but BOY are both the ‘john watson’ and ‘sherlock holmes’ characters so much better written in elementary. joan is strong, proud, and incredibly smart, to the point that she learns how to be just as good a detective as sherlock is

annabeth chase - PJO series - i’ve always loved the percy jackson series, and out of all the characters, i loved annabeth the most. she was smart and strong, but she was also incredibly prideful (and not always in a good way), something i can also relate to

aimee gibbs -  sex education - i don’t have much of a blurb other than i absolutely love her for how ditsy and adorable she is. i’ve had friends like her, and i strive to write dialogue like she has in the show

ben wyatt - parks and recreation - he’s baby and i love him. his fretting and sometimes obsessive nature appeal to me in a weird way. i’ve had ideas very similar to  (and also he and i hail from the same state!)

robin scherbatsky - how i met your mother - robin is this weird, kinda tomboy-e character that i absolutely adore. though i don’t love all of the decisions made towards the end of the show (fuck you series finale), the way they made her just a little weirder each season was perfect.

98: favorite historical era?

i really love the industrial revolution! and like all the cool stuff that came from it!!

thanks for the ask jorja!

[venustrape-arch]

she doesn't regret her decision. there's no doubt in her mind, she'd pulled her weight at a job that was never going to take her anywhere for longer than she should have. there had always been a glimmer of hope in her heart – that if she worked hard & stuck with them through all the failed comic relief bits, taking on whatever the opposite of impactful news is, she'd eventually climb her way up. but that just set her up for disappointment. so did the job in japan, which did her crushed ego no favors at any point. & just when she thought that at least she's back where she belongs, they want to ship her back where she came from. needless to say, she's tired. " barney, i don't know what good it'll do for every respectable news station out there to watch me act like an idiot on tape. " she's clearly still skeptical about his methods. & the clock is just ticking away. " thank you for believing in me... but i think i might have to accept defeat with this one. "

barney would never say it, but he was glad that robin had left her old job. she was clearly talented, and it was a shame her bosses couldn’t see that and just kept giving her fluff pieces. however, she was the only person in the gang still looking for a job and he could tell it was bumming her out. while everyone left in the morning, robin was stuck sending her resume to anyone and everyone, including a lottery which was clearly a blow to her ego. barney took a sip of his beer and listened. “we still have that reel on my computer, you know!” he offered. “and you don’t have to go back home, not yet! you’ll find something. you’re robin scherbatsky.”

[venustrape-arch]

" nobody likes an angry woman. " her shoulders lift in a nonchalant shrug as she lifts the glass of bourbon up to her mouth, the weight of the feeling behind her words minimized in an instant. sooner or later, someone always finds a reason to leave. & she can act like her younger self's anger doesn't sit at the very foundation of each one, but lily would never buy her crap. maybe her relationships have failed. maybe her friendships haven't stuck. but even in the worst of times, lily doesn't deign to let go of the bond they have. it's been a while since she's acknowledged that. " except you. you get it. " maybe not the full extent of it, but she tries. " you have so much patience, you know ? thank you for thinking i'm worth that. "

@cagedpotential [ lily ] | 🎁

[venustrape-arch]

@mecwmellc [ barney ] | sc

it's been a blow to the ego. she doesn't regret leaving her old job in the slightest, but unemployment hasn't been agreeing with her. & it's one thing for every news station in the city to turn their nose at her resume, but blowing a lottery girl audition ? she might as well dig herself a hole in the ground & not come out. well – not until she has to leave the country, anyway. six days left & all she's got is a list of jobs she didn't get, an unfinished reel somewhere on barney's computer & an urge to order herself a third scotch & soda. it's the perfect image of hopelessness. " i swear to god, i'm just ruining audition after audition & i couldn't have picked a crappier time. " slumped back inside their regular booth, she taps against the glass in front of her, the little shake of her head exuding defeat. " i just never thought i'd go back home like this, you know ? "

[venustrape-arch]

@cagedpotential [ lily ] | sc

it feels like she should be angrier. there's no shortage of people who have abandoned her one way or another in her life, but she's always found a way to cope – distractions do the trick well. normally, burying herself in work is her go-to. but this summer, she's been stuck in a blissful bubble of ignorance with ted. & if she's being entirely honest with herself now that the bubble is bursting, neither of them even thought to check in with themselves. not when marshall was falling apart right in front of them. they had to hold it together. & now that she's standing in front of the friend who left her behind without so much as a goodbye, she's wondering just how exactly she's expected to react. " lily. " she merely blinks, keys to her apartment chiming as her arm drops at her side. she has questions. because she wholeheartedly believes she should've been the one lily told. her friend should have known that when it comes to following aspirations to a new place on the map, she would have been the one to understand. why did she ghost ? why did she not keep in touch ? is she back for good ? " you're here. " some disbelief still lingers in the air. " – you dyed your hair. "

[venustrape-arch]

it still baffles her how easy this transition feels. the one thing that would make this a horrible idea has already gone out the window the second they started hooking up – expectations. if it's one thing she can count on, it's barney stinson's aversion to boyfriend duties. sleeping with someone comes easy. intimacy is another thing entirely & neither of them have the best track record with it, which is so weirdly comforting to know. still, they might be a mess individually, but they're perfectly imperfect together. they take each other as they are, & it makes things effortless. she allows herself to bask in that feeling for as long as she possibly can. " shut up. " she mumbles, but grins nonetheless, shifting for a second just to playfully elbow him in the ribs. his girl – the words stick in the back of her mind & she does her best not to overthink the implications. he teases her all the time, after all. no need to invoke the safe word. her body glues to his own once again, eyes closed as his warmth envelops her. it's quiet & safe & everything neither of them are used to... but it feels too good to ruin. " as if. i'm just using you for your body heat. " she jokes, sneaking in a quiet laugh, not daring to open her eyes again as she holds onto him. " ... it's not horrible though, is it ? "

barney nodded, letting the obvious half-truth pass between them, they both knew that their concern for ted had been tossed out the window the moment they'd started hooking up. of course they cared for ted, he was their best friend, but there was no denying that this thing between them was strong, maybe even stronger than any connection robin had ever had with ted. this was different. even as they told half-truths to each other to avoid the obvious feelings they both had, even then this was more real than what ted and robin had been. barney saw robin for who she was, and she saw him for the same. no expectations to change, to shift their believe systems, their future desires and goals to meet the other's expectations or dreams. they were just themselves, though it was possible barney was a slightly better version of himself with her, he had changed, only altered his behavior in order to keep her close. and it hadn't felt like a sacrifice, it had just been right. still, he let her 'concern' for ted sit and nodded, silent as he nuzzled his face against her neck, breathing in deeply before he chuckled, "that's my girl, always putting out. i always liked that about you." he teased. his girl? he didn't know where that had come from, but he didn't correct himself. "is this the part where we pretend we loved to cuddle until the other person falls asleep?" he added, though he didn't make any effort to pull away from her, maybe he'd convinced himself he actually did enjoy cuddling.

[venustrape-arch]

@cliqbaits | cont.

it was a good question. thinking back on the first time they ended up in bed together, she could only think of one thing – great job making the list, sherbatsky. it's not like there was room to process how she felt about what happened between them. she was just left guilty & questioning any shred of self respect she'd ever thought there was. but that was then. & things have changed. they keep changing. she's not saying their secret summer affair is particularly healthy, but they went into this on the same page – wanting something casual & fun. not being able to stay away from each other. the type of thing people might call a ticking time bomb. there's a reason nobody knows, after all. still... that ticking is louder than it's ever been, harmonizing with the beat of her heart. " i – " she hears herself asking him to stay & panics when he questions it, gaze shifting to the side. sleepovers weren't part of the deal. not explicitly. but for once, she can't stomach the thought of waking up to his empty side of the bed. " – just don't want you to run into ted, it's better if you stay. he chugged a lot of coffee, i think he's staying up to work on his first day teaching plan tonight. " relief fills the breath that leaves her as he pulls her close, arm wrapping around his middle & head tucked in the crook of his neck, gluing herself to his body. she knows she's not fooling him. & he's not fooling her, either. but she'll happily play along. " ah man, you got me. morning sex was totally my ulterior motive. "

[venustrape-arch]

i don't even really know how it happened . ( stella > robin )

it should be none of her business. if anyone's in need of explanations, answers, a goddamn sedative after this nightmare weekend, it's ted. it doesn't slip her mind that this all started with a wedding invitation meant for her. the only difference is, no matter how weird it would've been to be the groom's ex in that chapel, she would've never tried to stop the wedding. her friendship with ted simply means more. it's why her body language is so cold, her stare lacking any kind of understanding as she looks at the other woman, her wedding dress still on. she was simply not the ex they had to worry about & stella knows that now, more than ever. " you don't know how it happened ? that's the best you can do ? " frown deepens. " you know what – i'm not doing this. i'm sure you put all the really good stuff in the note, right ? " she ran into her for a reason. & it wasn't to let her off the hook. " i'm guessing that now that you went through with this, if you're being honest with yourself, you've known it wasn't right for a while. you knew & you said nothing. you led him on. " & how well she relates. thankfully, she didn't let it get this far. " i hope that stings. " her eyes veer over to a very distracted tony in the distance. " & i hope you don't make a habit out of it. "

@wr1tten