#( totally not talking from experience nope nah )

[wildflowercryptid]

florian's always struggled to make friends so he didn't really have any back in galar... uh, actually — it might be more accurate is that he USED to have one...

headcanon explanation + bonus under the cut!

like mentioned above, florian has always struggled a lot with making friends. while he's a kindhearted and friendly kid, he can come across as kinda intense to others, ( especially when discussing his interests, ) and that's led to him often being alienated amongst his peers. though he's grown used to being by himself and has learned to not care if others dislike him, he still hopes that he can find at least a few people to connect with outside of his family. it's a hope that's always been present, ever since he was growing up in wyndon.

of course, he wasn't the only loner amongst his childhood peers. around 7 years old, he found a friend in bede fee, who attended the same primary school as him. bede themself wasn't exactly the friendliest kid out there and often had spats with people who made fun of them for their family's low-income status, but florian managed to get them to warm up to him. the two got along pretty well and found comfort in having a friend that seemed to understand them, both being lonely kids who were often picked on by others. after a while, they became pretty much inseparable as they frequently played, read, and laughed together. to florian, it didn't matter that people picked on him just as long as he had bede there to be his friend. bede shared a similar sentiment... at least, at first he did.

admittedly, florian has a habit of resting on his laurels when it comes to things he doesn't have an interest in improving. ( it doesn't matter if he isn't as good of a battler as his sister, all he needs is to be strong enough to keep himself safe during field research. it doesn't matter if he's ostracized amongst his peers and looked down upon, he's alright as long as he has someone to call a friend. etc, etc. ) bede, however, couldn't keep themself from caring about their place in the pecking order. they were sick of others looking down on them, sick of others thinking they were better than them. they just couldn't understand how florian could stand people treating him poorly without getting angry. over time, frustration and resentment towards his attitude festered inside them. these feelings were only exacerbated by their struggles at home and being sent to the orphanage. while they would still call each other friends, their bond had definitely become strained.

everything came to a head when they were both 11 years old, when rose visited bede's orphanage and his acknowledgement caused a major shift in their personality. after all, someone that important seeing their potential surely meant that they better than their peers, right? they soon became much more pompous and rude in nature. florian still stayed close by despite bede's worsening attitude towards him, but it wasn't before long until all of their pent-up feelings came flooding out. their friendship ended with massive fight, with bede telling florian that they were sick of being weighed down by an " annoying pest " like him. while they expected for him to take their cruel remarks in stride like he always did with everyone else, bede couldn't help but feel a little guilty when florian ran off in tears. the two stopped talking after that fight and ever since then, there's always a worry in the back of florian's mind that his friends will eventually get sick of him like bede did. ( thankfully, the friends he's made since then have helped make him feel a lot more secure in their relationships. )

apologies for the long-winded explanation, here's the bonus i promised to make up for how sad this hc got :

the goofy ass side effect of coming up with this headcanon is realizing that they accidentally shaped each others' taste in guys rip

[revserrayyu]

2.6 Penacony thoughts [part 2]

**Spoiler warning** for everything up until the end of Rappa’s flashbacks. I’ve already finished the story by now so just be mindful of that if I do mention something earlier than intended or anything that happens towards the very end if you haven’t completed everything yet.

Knowing now that this whole ninja idea is a big delusion inside her own head is kinda sad honestly. I would’ve been down to see an entire society with people just like her.. but nope.

It is so darn sweet how much Dan Heng cares about his Astral Express family, aaaaah. His voice sounded so tender too.

I may be stupid, but for the longest time I believed that there was only one Emanator for each path, which is why when I heard Dan Heng mention Dr. Primitive as one for Erudition I thought, nah, that’s Herta.. until I remembered the Arbiter Generals are all sorta blessed by Lan, so clearly there can be multiple Emanators, yea? Do correct me if I’m wrong on any account. I don’t delve too deep into Aeon lore often. Regardless, if what Dan Heng says is true (which I assume it is because he’s incredibly intelligent), then yeah, this doctor could be a problem.

I love and cherish every moment Rappa breaks out into a rap. I’m sure each one of her voice actors did wonderfully.

The speed at which I chose the swear option should be feared. I didn’t even bother reading the other choices and I don’t regret it one bit because each of these lines is beyond hilarious!

Looking back now and I noticed there was an option to get the Trailblazer to rap instead, which would of course impressed Rappa, but.. yeah, guess that’s something I’ll never hear.

I couldn’t help myself but choose the swears a third time because of how hard Rachael’s delivery and the constant *bana* censors had me completely dying of laughter. Boothill would be so proud of me.

Never once while watching all version’s trailers would I have ever imagined that all those monkeys running around would’ve actually been people.. oh dear. This patch when from silly to serious real quick.

I honestly was a bit surprised to hear Rappa talk without the usual ninja jargon. I’ve grown rather fond of it and her quirkiness by now. Just a shame it’s all mainly a result of the experiments she was put through.

Psycho. But I’ll give him a pass. It did amuse me how we in fact change scenes right after this.

Oh huzzah he’s not totally corrupt by siding with Profnana. He has some standards and I dig that for him.

I don’t know why but he gives me the tiniest Aventurine vibes here and the whole “unlike the house, the gambler knows exactly what they want,” quote comes to mind.. at least the part about Reca knowing his main goal and how he’ll do anything to achieve it perfectly.

This scene.. is doing things to me. I’m touched by how adorable young Boothill looks and yet I’m also trying my best to look respectfully at older Boothill’s.. um, everything. I don’t own our space cowboy so it’s been a hot minute since I’ve read his lore, but I thought his whole cyborg body transformation was done all at once, sorta like how it was depicted in his light cone instead of by pieces like this.. I dunno, maybe he was taken apart and put back together several times, but goddamn, he looks amazing. But are they saying there’s only ten years difference between these two versions of him? Talk about a glow up.

Thank aeons this patch exists and gives me all the Boothill action I originally hoped for when this man was first introduced. I still don’t think he did much in the main Penacony story, but he’s certainly making up for lost time now.

This. Him. Yup. That’s all.

I’ll be completely honest.. if Rappa was actually as serious as she appears here, I’d love her twice as much. Don’t get me wrong, I adore the goofball she normally is, but there’s just something about the look in her eyes and that no-nonsense vibe she’s giving off here that tickles my fancy so much more.

Not entirely sure if it’s a common trait for Memokeepers to be capable of teleporting people, but it’s definitely an interesting little trick. From Black Swan’s cards to Mr. Reca’s film reels, I wonder what other possible methods are out there. Oh, and goes without saying, but I hope he’s playable in the future.

The moment Rappa’s flashback begins inside a lab and other people were seen inside of tubes, I knew our girl wasn’t an ordinary person. I didn’t know if I should be upset or intrigued by this twist because it certainly wasn’t the kind of backstory I was expecting for her. I didn’t pull for her so I didn’t even think to read through her character stories, so all this came outta left field for me.

I did know that her E6 portrait shows the back of her neck and what I originally assumed to be a tattoo of three little dots, or even something like a curse mark, but hearing all this now has made it very clear that it ain’t no tattoo!

Bruh.. and we thought Rappa was the true weeb. Nah, it’s this dude. She’s only living in a Naruto themed delusion because this guy loves a manga too much.

Well, at least this all explains why her combat path is Erudition. Not gonna lie but I kinda love when there’s an actual valid reason behind a character’s path. Sure, it makes perfect sense why people like Gepard is Preservation and Feixiao being The Hunt, but someone like Jiaoqiu? A military healer whom isn’t Abundance? Yeah, we all questioned why but his past experiences with war and how that trauma changed him undoubtedly support his path of Nihility. Now we get Rappa who follows The Hunt due to being a Galaxy Ranger, but her combat path is Erudition because that’s exactly what she was created to be.

Well fudge, didn’t expect this dude to resort to such violence. That’s usually Boothill’s job.

Oohhh dear.. before we concern ourselves with the obvious, who even is this other Galaxy Ranger who showed up? You think we’re ever gonna meet them? And how long until this game finally allows someone to swear without any censors?? I eagerly await the day and still place my hopes on it being for Seele.

So, um.. yeah. I say those experiments were quite successful and Rappa is someone to be feared. She’s so unbothered by the dead bodies around her, but I guess after ten years of suffering, you just become numb to this kinda stuff. Thank aeons to whomever saved her and allowed her to join the Galaxy Ranger instead. Our girl definitely softened up since then.

And with all that troublesome backstory out of the way, I’ll leave the rest for one last post. Much less serious from here on out.

[pandoa]

it's the little things: III

the little things they do for you

~feat. heartslabyul~ ~twisted wonderland x gender neutral reader~

~headcanons~ part 1│part 2│part 3

ace trappola saves you a seat wherever you two may go—though that doesn’t make him any less of a pain in the ass about it. in class, the cafeteria, library, or even your own dorm room, ace makes it his personal obligation to (1) save you a spot beside him, and (2) piss you off in the process. it's not like the seat wasn’t meant for you, but ace felt that he needed a much more entertaining way to save it for you. from draping a lazy leg over your seat just as your body finds its way into the chair to placing random—but overall harmless—items onto the cushions of your seat, he’ll do almost anything to mess with you. your reactions are just too priceless.

"Ah... class is finally over..."

"I thought Trein's lecture would never end! I am exhaus— Hm?"

"Oh, hey, (Y/n). What's up?"

"I... took your spot? Nah, I don't think I saw anyone sitting here before~ You're imagining it."

"Besides, my legs seem really comfortable here; I don't think I could move even if I wanted to."

"There's an open spot on the ground, though; you could sit there if you wa— Ouch! Okay, okay, I get it! I'll scooch over!"

"Just stop hitting me for Seven's sake!"

deuce spade unconsciously picks up your mannerisms. whether it be the certain phrases you say or the carefree way your hands seem to wave at the sight of him, deuce begins to mimic it all. he doesn’t even notice it until ace irritatedly points it out after a sickeningly oblivious “study session” with you and the other first years as the majority of the time was spent watching the two of you—each both more dense than the next. it wasn’t too difficult to catch on, really, but some part of deuce hopes that you hadn’t caught on just yet. he wishes to face his feelings properly, so perhaps give him a little more time, yes?

"Wait, so... in the history of magic, the fae began to progress their own kingdom... when?"

"Uh... let's see. It should obviously be sometime before the war between the fae and humans, that's a given, but... Huh?"

"What's up? Is there something wrong, (Y/n)?"

"We're both just sitting the exact same way—? Oh... yeah, I guess we are."

Deuce looked down only to notice the similar way your hands would fidget in sync with his. Oh, great. Now we're both twirling our pens the same way; I need to stop before this starts getting a little weird for them—

"U-uh! It's probably just a coincidence! Yeah!"

"No deeper meaning to it... totally."

cater diamond sets his phone aside when talking to you. he may be the type to practically be attached to his phone twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week; however, that doesn’t mean he lacks any self control when around you. even he knows that time is precious and that the memories he shares with you would come to be much more valuable than checking the likes of his latest magicam post. flipping over his screen to face the back of his phone, cater’s attention is entirely on you, and you alone. although, he might pull it out for a quick pic with you as you two are hanging out wherever you are. could you blame him, though? the view of you and him in the same camera frame was just too pretty for a sight to skip out on~

"(Y/n)! You made it~ I think you had something to tell me, right?"

"Nope, you weren't interrupting anything! Just posted a last-minute story on magicam—nothing too important."

"Just go on with whatever you wanted to tell me. I'm listening."

"Oh... my phone's ringing? They can wait, hehe."

"Keep going~ My full attention's only on you."

trey clover never fails to give you a small treat—be it a homemade piece of candy or pocket-sized sweets—each day he sees you. at first, it starts as a matter of chance. one day he happened to have a petite sample of a new recipe he’d been experimenting with and saw you as the perfect taste-tester of the newest treat. but as one day turned into another, trey found that he never failed to keep a sugary dessert inside a pocket or two of his uniform, each one different every day. he just enjoys the way your face seems to light up at the sight of the sweets gently being placed into the palms of your hands.

"(Y/n), here's the book you left back at Heartslabyul yesterday. Make sure to remember it next time, haha."

"It's no problem. Oh, yes, and—"

"I baked these miniature pies yesterday after you and Grim came over for the Unbirthday. They're candied, too, so they might be to your liking."

"It's no trouble! I'm glad you seem to like the smaller things I bake."

"It's nice to see whenever you enjoy my cooking, in all honesty."

riddle rosehearts is more lenient on you when regarding the dearest queen’s rules. he doesn’t seem to be doing it on purpose, though—no, no. all of his words and actions, to him, are all acts of respect and common courtesy for the dear prefect. you’ve encountered so much; the most he could do is show you respect as well, yes? like deuce, everyone but him tends to notice it and it truly messes with everyone’s minds. clearly an act of favoritism, all the students of heartslabyul grow envious of riddle’s much more lax treatment towards you. riddle may be fond of you, but why did they have to get the short end of the stick???

"And what do you all think you're doing eating a tart so guiltlessly?"

"Rule number 089: Never eat a tart without the Queen's permission. I do not remember giving any one of you permission to eat a tart today."

"Such violations will not go unpunished."

"Oh... the prefect is here, too? Well..."

"They are in no part of the Heartslabyul dorm and, in fact, lead their own dorm as well. We are—in some way—equals from differing dorms."

"No, I am not just conjuring excuses! Stop this nonsense, or off with your head!"

a/n: ace was one of those kids who’d pull on another kid’s pigtails or ponytail back in elementary school i just know it

[existslikepristin]

I should keep this up. My writing output is insane. Has anyone noticed that none of these are edited? (Probably, because they're fuckin bad XD)

(Story Index)

Not a moral implication in sight

“So Joy,” you say.

“Yes?” she asks in the kind of tone that implies she already knows what you’re going to say as she wipes a tiny bit of spit from the corner of her mouth. Your dick already feels lonely.

“You’re great at this, but I’m really in the mood to fuck your pussy. Mind getting undressed?”

Joy scowls and takes a sharp breath. “Ooh, sorry. That’s not going to be possible.”

“The undressing?”

“Oh no,” Joy chirps. Her green bikini thing expands away from her body for a moment, then becomes wispy and fades away like smoke. Her jewelry remains. “That part is easy.”

Your breath hitches at the uninhibited sight of her body. Sure she was mostly already naked and giving you a blowjob, but the wonders of her parts previously obscured are incredible. You’d spend quite some time staring blankly at her top-tier titties if she didn’t continue speaking.

“No, it’s the pussy part. See, I don’t have one.”

“Excuse me?”

Joy stands up (a beautifully graceful motion), backs up against the table, and points between her legs. Good golly, she’s right. Where her pubic mound goes between her thighs, you see no cleft signaling the beginning of some labia. Instead, it’s just blank space.

“See, within the genie genre or supernatural literature as a whole, there always has to be something that makes the genies unique. Some unexpected twist that gives underlying tones of ‘not like the other genies,’ right? Like if vampires sparkled in the sunlight for example. It’s ridiculous and arbitrary. So, I have no vagina. Why would I need one? Genies obviously don’t reproduce in the same way humans do.”

You’re not sure if you were actively listening. Your hand is already hovering toward her… nether region? It’s unclear what it should be called. Joy simply watches with an amused smile as you touch the space you would normally expect a pussy to be. She moans loudly, sensually, shocking you into removing your hand.

“I’m kidding,” she says, “I don’t feel anything down there besides your touch.”

“Do you not feel sexual pleasure, then?” you ask, “Because genies don’t need to or something?”

“Oh, I definitely feel the same sensations you would associate with sex, but it’s like a psychic thing. The happier you are with me, the more of a pleasure sensation I experience.”

“So you’ll always cum at the same time I do or whatever?”

“Nope!” Joy takes your hand and places it back between her legs. “It’s more like a constant pleasure. Like, I don’t know what the human equivalent would be. Alcoholism, maybe, without the constant threat of death.”

You gingerly rub at the empty space, still having a hard time mentally piecing together what you see. “That’s weird.”

“Nah. It’s your humans’ genitalia that’s weird. I don’t know what the big deal is. It’s just awkwardly placed wrinkly stuff that you love touching. I love touching it because I get a lot out of it, but aesthetically, you’re kind of wonky.”

You raise an eyebrow, wondering if you should be offended on behalf of humanity.

“You know what though? You could totally wish for some good pussy. It’s entirely reasonable, even expected, that at some point during our time together you’ll build up a substantial harem. If you want to hold off on getting off that way though, I can definitely go back to the blowjob. It was giving me lots of happy tingles. Or alternatively…”

Joy turns, swishing her hair over her shoulder so you can see her entire, smoothly muscled back. She bends over at the waist, leaning on the table. Between her excellently sculpted ass cheeks, clearly inside her, is a familiar sight: The butt plug you brought home.

“You could fuck my ass.”

Options (I still haven't decided on the best format for these):

Nope. Too weird. Tell her you want to go back to the blowjob.

Go ahead and wish for some of that good pussy she’s talking about.

Oh hell yes. Pull out all the stops/plugs and fuck Joy’s ass.

Hold the fuck up. If she doesn’t need a pussy, why’s she need an ass, or anything for that matter?

[nazmazh]

So, I'm talking with my friends, who are relatively big into Fortnite.

And they're explaining to me what today's update did to the game (me and the one's husband who is likewise not a Fortnite person).

And like, even though I'm not a Fortnite guy, I'm listening to this, and looking at what stuff has been posted to the internet.

And like...

Holy fucking shit.

It sounds like they're aiming to gut the whole core appeal of the game.

We're all just sitting here losing our goddamn minds at everything that apparently got pushed through in the new update.

I can't believe the speed at which Epic is looking to completely shoot themselves in the foot here.

It's like they sat atop their throne, and saw Blizzard/Microsoft, EA, CDPR, Unity, etc., etc. make massive blunders that utterly alienated large chunks of their otherwise passionate fanbases.

And decided that they could do that too! "We should emulate the unpopular moves those guys are making!"

Guns/weapons in the art/assets of your 3rd-person shooter-game where people expressly are being told to kill each other in-game?

Nope. Can't have that.

Not even in personal loading screen images that literally only the user will see.

No, there's no option for "I am 18+, I'm fine if I see this imagery. Here, I can prove this."

No guns in a shooter game. Not even empty holsters.

Borderlands Psycho-Man? Nah that skin's fine.

Michael "I'm from the slasher-movie codifier" Myers? Totally fine.

Funny jellyfish man that has a bandoleer? "FUCKING RESTRICT THAT SHIT IMMEDIATELY!"

Anyway, here's our new licensed character: "Omni-Man, from the famously all-ages property, Invincible!"

They're even locking skins that came out as part of bonus content that was sent out with today's release.

They couldn't even be bothered to fix their own "controversial" art assets before releasing it.

Because that'd be the more reasonable fix, if say, you're committed to this whole "violence bad" thing in your assets. Edit all the models and skins to remove those things, not restrict the content from the users who have sunk time and money into being able to use it.

But no.

They did not do that.

As my friend pointed out - The cornerstone of their legal defense against children playing this game has been "We are aware that there are many children playing our game. However, the game is rated T. You have to have an account to play - You must be of a certain age in order to make an account. Or have a parent give explicit consent to allow you to play despite being under that age. If the child lied about their age, the account must be terminated anyway, because it's invalid. If you gave consent for your child to play without really paying attention to the content, that's on you. At any rate, we have performed our responsibility with regards to child safety."

But... If they're expressly making this game more appealing to children, while still having the rating of T, then... Aren't they themselves actively encouraging children to play their game that is not rated for children? Which kinda invalidates them saying that children should not be playing this game?

And, and! Burying the main mode (well, two mode - Standard Game and Standard Game/No Build) in a sea of uncurated fan/player-made creative mode mods?

Like, it's like they're trying to frame those modes as just another possible experience, instead of like, the core reason people play the game.

Apparently the person in-charge (they got rid a previous creative/content director, if I'm understanding properly) has said something to the effect of "The MetaVerse-type experiences are why people play this game".

Not "They're a big part of the appeal, so we want to see how we can make that better/easier to access."

Just, essentially "This is the only thing we really care about now."

Like, I'm usually pretty skeptical of fanboy-type rage. But, like, nah, I'm all-in with them on this one.

It helps that my design-sensibilities-type-rage is almost never reigned it. This is pure stupidity on many, many levels.

It will be interesting to see how this plays out going forward. Will they realize just how badly they fucked up and revert things? Or will they double-down and lose their entire audience that actually pays for things themselves, and hope that little Timmy raiding mommy and daddy's credit card will be enough to sustain them going forward?

[purplesurveys]

1665

What’s your favorite amusement park? Feels unfair to call it a favorite when it’s the only one I’ve been to, but to be fair Universal Studios in Singapore wasn’t bad at all. Only thing I hated about the trip was that gross couple in front of us who endlessly made out while my family and I were in line for one of the rides.

Do you know your social security number (or equivalent) off by heart? Nah. Our HR team currently takes care of everything relating to my social security so there isn’t really a reason for me to memorize it, at least for now lol.

What would you take to a potluck dinner? Truffle mac and cheese from my favorite Italian restaurant. 

Do you have any sisters? How is your relationship with them? I have a sister, two years younger. We’re pretty tight, but our relationship is very casual more than anything. We’ll rant to each other and occasionally share how our day went, but we’d never confide in one another or have heart-to-hearts.

When was the last time you changed your hair and what did you do to it? I had it dyed to purple and trimmed up to my neck last October. It’s since faded back to a light brown and my roots are awkwardly growing out, but I’ll likely wait til June-ish to dye it back to purple again so that it looks perfect by the time we fly to Thailand.

What’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever done? Uh. Maybe that time I got an ex-partner a pendant with some pretty significant symbols inside when you open it? I don’t remember 98% of the relationship, but that one sticks out.

Do you listen to audiobooks? If so, what was the last one you listened to and did you like it? No, my attention span is too awfully short for something like that. Also why I can never get into podcasts no matter how hard I try.

Describe yourself in five words. Loyal, (too) hardworking, passionate, resentful, sensitive.

What was your favorite class in high school? History.

When was the last time you did laundry? Couple of days ago.

Do you own a leather jacket? Do you wear it often? No. No reason to own one considering the climate we experience in this part of the world, hahaha.

Can you get Chinese food from a drive-thru in your town? Yeah, we have a Chowking just right outside the village.

If you could choose your middle name, what would you pick? I’ve always liked my second name (Isabelle). I liked it too much to the point that when I was a kid and was being teased in school about my unisex name, I tried making my second name my main nickname; it didn’t stick though. Partially my fault too because I’d never turn around when I was being called by my second name hahaha

Would you rather see a sunrise or sunset? Sunset. I don’t like waking up early, and I’ve always thought sunsets looked better and more peaceful anyway.

Do you have any plans to buy any furniture in the near future? Nope.

When you go to bed, do you go to sleep straight away? Sometimes, but most of the time I’d continue to use my phone and go through social media and Reddit until my eyes start feeling heavy.

What do you do for a living? I work as an account manager in the public relations industry.

Do you own a suitcase? When was the last time you used it? Where did you go? I do, but I haven’t used it in since 2016 when I went on a cruise and had to pack for three different countries. I don’t plan on using it for my upcoming Thailand and Malaysia trips, either.

How many pets have you had in your life? More than 10, but I don’t remember how many goldfish we owned in total.

Is there any soda in your fridge right now? We may have Coke actually but idk?? I had my birthday dinner with friends last night and my mom asked if anybody wanted soda so apparently we have some.

Do you call it soda, pop, fizzy drink or something else entirely? Soda or softdrink depending on who I’m talking to. Filipinos tend to use ‘softdrink’ so I’m likely to use that when talking to an older friend/relative.

Do you need to get any groceries right now? What do you need? MORE 3-IN-1 COFFEE. I recently ran out :(

If I was visiting your town, what would you take me to see and do? Probably one of the cafés up the mountain so you can see the Metro Manila skyline.

What was the last thing you spent money on? Beer.

What subscription services do you have? Spotify, YouTube Premium, Netflix, Disney+.

Do you like olives? I have my moods for it but otherwise I will take them out if I encounter them in a dish.

Would you rather be too warm or too cold? Too cold. These days the heat index is reaching 50ºC so being ‘too warm’ is at the VERY BOTTOM of my priorities right now.

What’s your favorite name for a girl? Olivia. I like the name Mia too, but one of my clients has the same name so for now it’s taken a backseat as my favorite lololol. I love Elliott for a girl, too.

How do you make your coffee? I rely on 3-in-1 coffee precisely because I’m terrible at making my own coffee and always fuck up the ratios for the add-ons.

Do you know anyone who has a matching tattoo with someone? (including yourself)? Apart from BTS, no not really lol.

[bugbyte]

Medical nonsense! Spent my evening crying about it. That’s becoming my new hobby.

Some of this discusses needles and medical trauma, and even though I’m tagging those I also want to be up front because it’s pretty heavy.

Got a letter from an office I haven’t been to yet that’s doing yet more genetic testing for something that’s for sure confirmed to run on one side of my family and will also Mess You Up, and instead of being informed by a person it’s just. Like 3 sentences that vaguely explain this other test they want to do.

It’s a nerve conduction test, plus an electromyogram, both of which involve sticking a bunch of needles into muscles and then either putting electricity in to see what happens or measuring electrical output on an oscilloscope. Which, because I love electronics sounds fascinating on the surface except for the needles part and realizing that those suckers are going to have to go deep to actually touch muscle (which I learned from trigger point injections) and so yeah no I am filled with a copious level of nope and dread. The nah cup runneth over. I’m going to try and speak to a human and see if this is actually necessary because I don’t have symptoms of the genetic thing presently, but I was advised to test for the gene now because it appears later in life. And if I can do anything or science improves before then, I want to know.

Then I thought about it too much and had a panic attack, which took a while to put 2 and 2 together, but it’s trauma, it’s always trauma if you keep peeling back layers. I had surgery in mid-2020, sort of unexpectedly, and at the height of the pandemic. I had never had surgery before, so I was in the hospital, alone, cut off from family and support people because they took my belongings to a locker, so my phone was out of my hands. At the time I was much worse about dealing with needles than I am now and got a bunch of surprise blood draws and injections and several failed IVs in pre op when I had mentally prepared for…one IV.

Anyway, I was having a panic attack because I had been told not to take my meds beforehand and they threw my spouse out of the waiting area even though I had been told he could stay with me because of my anxiety. I tried to communicate all of this to the nurses setting me up but, man, these two just had some kind of good cop/bad cop routine going on and Bad Cop was trying to get blood from my hand and slapping my veins viciously. The other nurse was in my other arm placing the IV but the tube size was incorrect and instead it started leaking everywhere, so Bad Cop came over to help and just applied an excessive amount of pressure to keep the IV in place while a new tube was put in but man, it did not need to be nearly that rough. I was not bleeding and it wasn’t meds going in, just saline. All of this did not help my panic attack. She was just clearly pissed about having to deal with me and got away with just enough physical violence that could be written off as necessary for the blood draw and me exaggerating because of the panic attack. I wasn’t exaggerating though. I had bruises for over a month. I bruise easily, but this was something else.

The first person there to show me any kindness was the anesthesiologist who spoke kindly to me and talked about the procedure and then dosed me with versed to help with the panic. Here’s the thing: versed is supposed to calm you down and make you forget what’s happening. My anxiety was so high that she had to come back for another dose. I clearly remember everything up to being put under. My brain was fighting that hard, under the impression it was going to die, because panic attacks do that. I felt like a wilted plant but I had total awareness in a limp body, which was also a mildly terrifying experience.

Anyway, dropping a weird new test on me this week with very little information or justification, that’s apparently needle based and described as “mildly uncomfortable” (one of the greatest lies in medicine) just slapped every button on my console like a kid in an elevator.

I’m just, not willing to put myself in a room alone with people I do not know who are going to stick me and tell me “it doesn’t hurt that bad.” Baby, I have a connective tissue disorder, everything hurts that bad. Trigger points leave me bruised for a week. I sublux my shoulder on the regular and have to straighten my fingers because the joints have popped out and my free floating fingers are point more sideways. Tightly-focused, sharp, drawn-out pains are my kryptonite, but at least I’m self aware.

So. You know. Crying it out and trying to parse where all this defense mode came from, and what do you know, it’s hospital trauma. Chalk that up as a new one. Or an old one. Brains are awful. I’ll get through, I always do, but I feel like I keep re-emerging as a new person every time which is a confusing feeling.

[burntmcnuggies]

Jealous Bird (Smut)

Jealous! Hawks x Reader

Warnings: sexual themes, strong language, feral Hawks, rut, unprotected sex, and a jealous birb, 18+ only please! :D

If you’d like the fluff version and not the smut, you can go here! ➪ Fluff <3

“Mornin’ chicken wing. What’re we doin’ for breakfast? I paid last time so this is allll on you.” Hawks sent a playful wink towards you as he landed beside you from his previous place in the air, holding his hand up and rubbing his index and thumb together as a sign he wanted you to pay. You rolled your eyes and rose your hand, mocking him. “Don’t forget who spent hours doing YOUR paperwork because a certain birdbrain was too lazy to do it.” Hawks held up his hands in defeat and slumped over, sticking out his bottom lip, over exaggerating his facial expressions. He whined and let his wings droop. “C’mon just one more time? Pretty please with your favorite pretty bird on top?”

“Stop dragging your wings, you’re gonna get them dirty.” You scolded and pat his back, slightly feeling how tense his shoulder were. You were about to offer to give him a massage later, not wanting your friend to have to sleep tonight with stiff muscles until you noticed something. His wings were almost glowing a whole new shade now. Such a vibrant and beautiful color. It was then realizing how close you were that you could hear a faint cooing bubbling from his throat. “...? The fuck are you doing Hawks?” He looked over confused and tilted his head. You grumbled at his lack of knowing exactly what he was doing. “Do you even have complete control over your body? You don’t even realize you’re whistling and cooing like some pigeon.”

You completely missed the pissed off look that crossed his face at your comment. He plastered on a cheeky smile and put his hands behind his back, picking his wings off the ground and tucking them firmly behind his back. “Nah, sometimes my bird-side comes out, especially during spring. God I go fuckin’ crazy. Sometimes it’s early and I have to take a whole week off a work!” You looked up to a couple trees you both passed while you were walking to your usual breakfast place, KFC —Although you always debate you want to go somewhere else. It was late winter, very close to spring, about March. You never kept up with the date. “Why do you take a whole week off?”

“People with animal quirks like me would understand. Just like Mirko! Haha, I’m sure she’s the worst right now bein’ it’s early March!” He laughed and put his hands out, his hands snaking into his pockets to firmly stick there. You pouted, wanting to know exactly what Hawks was talking about. You told Hawks everything, but he didn’t give you the same treatment. “I’ll just ask Mirko later then if you refuse to tell me.” Hawks quickly wagged his finger side to side in front of your face, his other hand being placed on his hip now. You were familiar with his body language and how much he loved using his hands. “Nah ah, chicken wing. You do that and she’s gonna pounce on you. You won’t see light for days!”

“Mirko has accidentally jumped on me before, it’s not like we haven’t sparred before! I can withstand some punches and kicks!” Hawks sulked again, his hands digging back into his pockets, displaying his annoyance that you weren’t listening to him. He just looked away and shrugged his shoulders back. “Just trust me, kiddo. It’d be for the best you didn’ see Mirko, especially at a time like this. I know how she feels.” You were starting to get irritated at his lack of response to your question, only dodging it and making you sit in suspense. Finally you gave up and decided to bring it back up later. “I’m just gonna stop asking, you’re obviously not gonna answer me are you?”

“Haha! Nope! You know me too well, (Y/N).” You both arrived at KFC, immediately greeted by the manager and many of Hawks’ fans who knew he came there a lot. Many asked for his autograph or a selfie, but he refused politely. “I’ll do some after I get some chicken! I’m starved!” Super fans offered to even pay for his food, to which he declined, saying that you were kind enough to have already offered to pay for his food. A total fat lie! He begged you to pay! You sent him a glare and proceeded just to order both your meals while Hawks spoke with his fans. “Well, guess I can start now! Who’s first?” After he saw you were paying and ordering, he began to sign autographs and take selfies that would no doubt be on social media in minutes.

“Man! I sure do have a lot of supportive and loyal fans! Must suck never bein’ noticed.” Hawks passively insulted your rank as a pro hero by taking a jab at your ranking. You were somewhere in the mid thirties. Not popular at all, especially in this part of Japan where Hawks was born. “At least I have fans who aren’t thirsty for me! Getting all wet and horny at night thinking of their hero Hawks taking them from behind~” You smirked and rose your hands shrugging your shoulders, before hugging yourself. You bit your lip, closing your eyes and squirming with a dreamy smile, mocking his thirsty fan girls. “Oh Hawks! Please I’ll do anything for you! Take me! Oh please fuck my sopping pussy with your big fat cock til I can’t move anymore! Mm! Cum inside me! Let me bare your kids!

You didn’t notice the way his wings trembled and his face reddened, his avian eyes widening as he watched you speak so lewdly. He shook it off quickly before he got out of control and leaned forward towards you smirking. “At least I have fans thirstin’ for my cock~ haven’t heard of anyone wantin’ your boring ass!” He gave a closed eye smile and brought his hands up to give you a big fat thumbs down. Your eye twitched and you remained silent, not having a comment. That was until you remembered a villain hitting on you not too long ago. “Well at least I’ve had a villain fawn over me! I can still remember it clearly! ‘Oh fuck, I would turn good to get a piece of that ass!’”

This time you noticed how his brows furrowed, and his wings fluffed up, almost as if he just had a whole shiver rake through his body. “When was this?” He asked, his head now resting in his right hand, staring intently. You thought about it for a minute, before taking a wild guess. “Ehh, about like a couple months ago.” This only put him in a more sour mood. You didn’t understand why he was acting so strange. Maybe it was what you talked about? Obviously you’d never talked about anything sexual with Hawks, but on the topic of thirty fans aching for him, you wanted to make jokes since he was always mocking you and making sly insults. “Sorry... I didn’t mean to make things awkward.”

“Nah, it’s fine. It’s not your fault. Well... it kinda is.” He admitted afterwards and smirked at you teasingly as if you would already know it was your fault. You frowned, about to open your mouth again before they called your number to get your food. You sighed and stood from your seat, walking over to the counter and retrieving the food, however, you were stopped by a man. He was young, about nineteen or twenty, quite handsome. “Excuse me miss, this may sound really straightforward and all but, you’re really pretty, and I was wondering if I could get your number?” You blushed a bit and looked away. You were a bit weary, but decided anyways. “I-I don’t know... I guess so. You seem nice. It’s-“

“Hey there, you gotta hobby of stealin’ other people’s things?” A gloved band came in contact with your shoulder, and a large shadow cast over you and the man in front of you. The man gasped in amazement at seeing the number two pro hero standing before him, it would’ve been a better experience if Hawks wasn’t threatening him with his looks and smart-ass remarks. “Huh? Oh! S-Sorry I didn’t-“ Hawks rudely interrupted the man, his gloved hand squeezing harder. His smile was obviously forced, and his feathers were starting to fluff up every second that past he stood in front of this guy. “Eh don’t worry about, you didn’ know. Now that ya do, don’t come near her again, Kay?”

And in the blink of an eye, Hawks pulled you away and out of the fast food restaurant. He aggressively pulled out the food and shoved yours against your chest, unwrapping his quickly and munching on it. “What the hell Hawks?! That was a bit much! He was being nice! It’s not like we’re dating or anything...” You trailed off, watching his wings twitch and fluff. You had noticed his strange behavior for a couple days now. His feathers would fluff up every now and again —you had no idea why— especially near men. “You should be thankin’ me chicken wing. I just saved you from a world of heartbreak.”

“That’s not your place to decide, Hawks. I don’t intervene when women ask for your phone number.” You crossed yours arms and turned your nose up at his childish behavior. He didn’t respond, finishing his breakfast and throwing away his trash in a nearby can. His hands slipping back into his pockets, displaying that he was closing himself off from you now. Of course, you began to become irritated at his lack of voice, but you decided to let it go and not pressure him further. “You’ve been acting weird lately ya know? I’m getting worried...”

“Don’t worry about it, I’m fine.” Oh how you hated his emotionless voice, so bland and robotic, it honestly pained you. His eyes were sharp, quick to notice your saddened expression. Hawks sighed heavily and stuck his bottom lip out, wrapping his arm around your arms and pulling you close to him. “I’m one of the top five pros, you don’ gotta worry about me, chicken wing. Cheer up.” You smiled and shoved him off, only a bit happy his cocky and arrogant behavior had returned. The Hawks you knew and cherished. “You know, I hate you sometimes, but I can’t help but love you at the same time.”

“Who doesn’t love me? The sexiest bird-man around.” He smirked and gave you a flirtatious look, a small sound bubbling from his throat similar to a whistle. You returned his smirk with a teasing smile. You were almost immune to his flirty charm, key-word; almost. Hawks was definitely an attractive man. Those piercing eyes with dark markings around them, only making the color pop and glow. His messy hair swept back and disheveled. Let’s not forget about those bushy eyebrows of his, they almost look like feathers from his wings, only a beautiful ashy blonde color just like his hair. You could probably do without his egotistical attitude and vulgar tongue, but that was still all part of his charm. “Move!”

You were surprised by Hawks suddenly grabbing you and jerking you out of the way of an attack from a villain. You were right there in his chest, feeling his warmth, hearing the harsh thumping of his heart at the thought of almost losing you. Before he had a chance to say what he wanted. “Well there goes our leisurely patrol. And more paper work on our desks.” Hawks grunted in annoyance and took to the air. You finally regained your composure and got into your fighting stance. “Ready to kick some ass Hawks?! Whoever lands the final blow is treated to lunch!”

“Heh, you don’t stand a chance! Show me whatcha got!”

—

“Thanks Edgeshot... I totally owe you one.” You scratched their back of your neck with an awkward smile as you stood in front of the current number four hero. While Hawks was on the assault, eager to show off and boost his already high ego, you tried to get a sneak attack in, but the villain noticed you. They were about to attack you, before Edgeshot came and got you out of the way. Hawks didn’t take this too well. He became angry immediately and finished off the villain in a matter of seconds. “No thanks necessary, (H/N). I was just doing my job.” You hated being in debt to someone more than anything, so you quickly threw out an offer.

“Please! Let me take you out for drinks! Honestly! I’ve gotta do something! I-“ Suddenly a large shadow cast over you for the second time that day. You turned around and shrunk down noticing Hawks’ wings spread wide, fluffed to the brim and shaking in anger. His face was red and his eyes were narrowed at Edgeshot. He was angry at himself for not being able to protect you himself, and at Edgeshot for rescuing you and holding you close. That was supposed to be him. “H-Hawks? What’s wron-“ Edgeshot was the one who answered your main question earlier before Hawks could even get another word out. The answer shocked you to your core, finally understand why he was acting so weird.

“He’s showing his dominance, and in a public place no less, how careless.” You looked at the ninja hero confused before you turned your attention back to Hawks. Dominance? His wings were such a beautiful vibrant color now. A shade of red you’d never seen them before on him. A sudden flash captured your eyes, taking your attention away from his beautiful wings. The media was eating this up. Soon it would reach the Hero Public Safety Commission and the president would not like this one bit. “I’m sorry, (Y/N). But I’m impatient, I can’t wait any longer.” Your eyes widened as your attention was fully back on Hawks now. You opened your mouth about to ask what he meant, but something was preventing you from doing so.

Hawks’ lips were firmly placed upon your own, his bright red rings wrapping around the both of you to shield you from any watchful eyes wanting to take a peek at you. His lips were soft, his hands finding themselves on your waist, pulling you flush against his body. You were shocked, your eyes wide, heart hammering wildly out of your chest at the sudden action. Slowly, you began to kiss him back, falling victim to his charm and passionate ways. He was quickly heating up the kiss, but you placed your hands on his chest firmly, pushing him away just enough to separate your lips. He was chasing your lips, desperate to get another kiss. “Hawks what-“

“I’m tired of waiting. I can’t fucking hold it in any longer. I know I’m impatient, but you make it so fucking hard to hold back sometimes.” You opened your mouth about to question, but the only thing that came from your mouth was a terrified scream having Hawks launch you both into the air and fly quickly through the skies. You held onto him for dear life, screaming at him to put you down. You nearly hugged the ground when Hawks reached a luxury penthouse apartment. “What the hells the matter with y- mmm!” He forced his lips onto you quickly, roughly grabbing your body and pulling you against him. His wings still outstretched and flapping slightly.

His feathers went to open the sliding glass door, pushing you inside while still having your lips firmly connected. He was hungry, eating your mouth like it was the only thing he’d had in years. His tongue forced its way passed your lips, dominating the inside of your mouth with his fiery passion. Your hands clawed at his fluffy tan jacket, pulling him closer, your body now aching to be touched more by him. He was just so intoxicating. It was starting to get hard to breath after a while, and you tried to pull yourself away, but he moved with you, keeping your lips firmly together. He only parted away to growl out an order to you. “Breath through your nose.”

His hands were on you again, thick gloved hands trailing down your waist to grab a handful of your tasty ass. A squeak flew out of your lips, allowing him deeper access to your mouth than he already had. You couldn’t deny the dampness beginning to build down there. Your panties were now wet with your slick, making you slightly uncomfortable with the way the damp fabric rubbing against your folds. “God.” He breathed against your lips, not even giving you a second to catch your breath before he was on you again. His hands quickly got towork on getting your shirt off. “I can smell your fuckin’ arousal. Fuck it’s intoxicating. You drive me fucking crazy!”

“H-Hawks! W-Wait!” You voiced your want to stop and talk whatever he was feeling out, but just seeing that lustful passionate look in his eyes, it was a lost cause. His pupils were blown with lust, his breathing heavy and ragged, desperate to start touching you again. “It’s your fault... all your fuckin’ fault it came early. Now be a good baby bird and take responsibility.” You didn’t have time to refuse before he was on you again, his lips finding their way harshly to your neck, his teeth lightly biting. You jerked your head to the side, moaning softly at the feeling of his canines digging into your skin. Your heart was hammering harshly against your chest feeling his thick glove drift up your shirt, roughly grabbing your boobs, groaning at the squishy feeling in his hands. “I didn’ want you to see me like this... but after all the shit that’s happened today... I can’t hold back. Not anymore. That was out the door whenever you started mocking my thirty fans.”

He pulled your shirt over your head quickly, pushing you back into his couch while his hands grabbed your waist, his tongue sliding across the top of your breasts. A shiver raked through your body, low pants leaving your mouth as you watched his mouth move lower. In a flash of red, a feather came up and sliced your bra open, being the impatient man he is, he didn’t want to struggle with getting it off you just to see those perky nips of yours. You were quick to cover yourself, too embarrassed showing your best friend your body like that. It’s not like you would ever look at each other the same after this. A strong grip enclosed around your wrists, Hawks grabbing your wrists and pinning them by your sides.

“H-Hawks...” Your breathy whisper of his name drove him almost mad. He breathed onto one of your nipples, hot breath fanning over the entirety of your perky buds. You squirmed in discomfort and whimpered, your body betraying your mind, desperately wanting his mouth on you. “Hah... I knew you wanted me just as much as I fucking wanted you. How long, how long have you wanted me? Tell me. Tell me how much you crave me right now, ‘cause I can’t get enough!” He drew out the flat of his tongue, running it over your nipple, all while his golden eyes stared right at you expressions. Your legs clinched together tightly feeling a tingling sensation spread from his lick. “Hawks no, mmm~ you cant...”

“I can, and I will, you’re mine, and I’m not lettin’ you out of my apartment until I’ve marked you as mine, and you’ve got so much fucking cum inside you that you’ll already look pregnant.” Your eyes widened and you jerked away from him. Pregnant?! Was he out of his mind?! You weren’t even dating yet! Sure you’ve had feelings for him for a long time now but this was all moving too fast! “What did you expect? I’m gonna breed you so fuckin’ good. So fucking good. You won’t be able to think about anyone else but me.” Now it all clicked. What he said earlier, how he was acting now. Why hadn’t you noticed it sooner? He practically told you everything this morning, you were just too stupid to consider it.

Mating season.

That’s why his feathers had been brighter, the cooing and whistling coming from his throat. The displays of dominance to other men who you conversed with. Courting traits for a male trying to attract a female. You weren’t dumb, animals mated to do one thing, and one thing only. Reproduce. Their instinct immediately is to find a female and mate with them, reproduce and leave. However, this wasn’t always the case in some. “Fuck, you smell so damn good down here. Your pussy’s so wet for me already. And I haven’t even done anything, yet. Looks like you’ve become a thirsty fan, huh? Wanting my cum deep inside you and gettin’ wet while I manhandle you? Fuck, you’re so damn sexy.”

“Hawks m-more~” You were hesitant to ask him for more, worrying for your poor body and your sensitive heart. Only sensitive for him. You accepted your feelings for him, struggling to voice your new found notion to him. He growled lowly in response to your request, hands hastily pulling your pants off in one fell swoop. He was absolutely feral. “I wanna eat you out so fuckin’ bad. Your sweet pussy, sopping snd beggin’ to be stuffed, fuck.” He has a particularly vulgar tongue most of the time, but never like this. He always expressed how hard it was for him to hold back, but this was a completely different side of him you’d never seen. It was like he was feral. A complete animal. “Oh, I’m gonna tongue fuck the shit out of you. You’ll cum all over my tongue, just like how you’re gonna squirt all over my cock.”

He stood up quickly, his feathers dispersing to shrug his jacket off before he pulled his tight shirt over his head. Just like that his wings came back to life, flapping slightly as a readjustment. His gloves were removed as well, now you could feel his bare hands roaming over your exposed body. He dropped to his knees, spreading your legs and putting your inner thighs around his head, but not too tight. He approached your entrance, a damp spot clearly evident on your fabric panties. His fingertips dug into your thighs, pushing his face flush against your panties. He let out a breathy moan against your wet folds protected by your panties, subconsciously humping the couch for even the slightly bit of pressure against his hard cock.

“Hah, fuuuuck. I’m so horny, everything’s so hot. Let’s get these cute little panties off. Don’t wanna rip ‘em now. Need something to hold my cum inside your pretty pussy so you bare my kids.” Hawks grabbed your panties and pulled them down your legs and onto the floor. He kneeled on his knees in front of the couch, his head between your legs, your feet propped against the coffee table, and your hands gripping the couch anywhere you could, desperately wanting to grab his messy hair. “Oh god...” He moaned at the sight of your sopping pussy, your slick slowly dripping onto the couch much to your embarrassment.

“D-Don’t stare dumba- H-Hawks!” You cried out his name in surprise once he drove his face deep into your crotch. His nose firmly pressed against your sensitive clit, his tongue diving deep into your cunt without warning. Your hands dove straight to his hair, pulling at his blonde locks trying to keep yourself composed from his pleasure. “Oh fuck! Oh Hawks! Sh-Shit! Mmm baby yes~” Your head was spinning, his teeth lightly pressing against yours folds. It didn’t help anything with all of the lewd smacking and slurping of his tongue eating you out so damn good. “Ahh! N-No Wait! Your tongue! It’s so... Ngh! Deep!”

“Keep moaning for me, just like that. Moan for me and don’t you dare fuckin’ stop.” The vibrations of his lips against your sensitive pussy cause you to flinch and squirm against his sinful touch, fingers pulling at his hair harder. An unexpected groan escaped his lips as he went back to work, tongue swirling and digging around, searching for that one spot that would make your world come undone. You continued to moan and call out his name, instinctively pushing his head deeper. His movements were quick and sloppy, savoring every lick of your delicious fluids, groaning lewdly against your pussy’s lips once he found that spot. “Oh fuck! Right there! Mm~! More! Please a-again!”

He ruthlessly began to abuse that spot, pushing his tongue harshly against it and attempting to massage it. His fingers poked and prodded at your insides, pushing his fingers past and replacing his tongue with those long slim fingers of his. Your head was now thrown back against the couch, releasing his hair and clawing at the couch for dear life, desperately clinging to anything you could grab. You moaned at the foreign feeling, forgetting what if even felt like to have sex. You had a fleeting experience in your last year of high school, but that was it. One time thing. Now here you are doing it again, with your best friend no less, or were you even friends anymore? His fingers worked on making sure you were prepared for him. You were enjoying yourself, being pleasured by the man you’ve hidden your feelings from for years. Him however...

His cheeks were dusted pink, sweat trickling down his forehead with some of his curly blonde locks sticking to his face. His breathing was ragged, heavy and stuttered with a thick sense of desire behind it. His wings were quivering, the color so vibrant it could rival a neon sign. Now you didn’t know much about their nature, but you could tell just by looking at his wings that he was very excited and desperate. “Gotta get you nice and prepared for me right, chicken wing? Gotta get you ready to take my fat cock.” His lewd words made your world just so much hotter. You could feel your arousal leaking down your pussy to your puckered hole and down onto Hawks’ expensive couch. “Ahh! St-Stop! I’m-Im gonna cum! Oh god I’m gonna cum!”

He jerked his fingers out quickly, grunting in the process as he lustfully stared at his fingers coated in your juices. He breathed out a moan while he kicked away all your juices, growling lowly in possessiveness. “Sorry chicken wing but... I want you to cum on my cock. I want to feel you clampin’ down on me, cumming so hard you faint. Screaming my name at the top of your lungs so that everyone knows that you’re mine! All fuckin’ mine.” Your eyes widened seeing him sit up more, pushing his pants down the rest of the way before kicking them off, leaving him in only his red boxers. His arousal was definitively clear, noticing how the head of his cock peeked out from the waistband, leaking pre-cum, tip red and aching. The sight was undeniable steamy, your legs clenching together with your thighs slowly rubbing together. “That’s right baby. Already thirstin’ for my cock, aren’t you? Fuckin’ slut. My slut. Hah... fuck I gotta be inside you.”

He pushed his boxers down, revealing his aching hard-on. Balls lulling down, full of cum, ready to be emptied out inside of your tight pussy. Without thinking, you sat up slowly coming close to his erection. You could smell his heavily masculine and musky scent from where you were, but you needed more of him. You sadly didn’t get far before he grabbed your head and pushed you back. “Nah ah, baby. Not today. I’m too fuckin’ horny and desperate to let you suck my cock today. Next time.” Next time? There was going to be a next time? Your heart hammered harshly knowing your long time friend and crush planned on doing all of this again with you. “Hang on tight, dove. It’s gonna be a long bumpy ride.”

“W-Wait!” You watched in worry as Hawks pinned you down, spreading your legs and positioning himself. You hadn’t taken him seriously, but now you regret it. “P-Protecti- Ahn~!” You couldn’t even protest once he pushed himself inside, moaning loudly at the sinful heat that engulfed his cock, heating up his entire body more than it already was. His wings flapped slowly, occasionally twitching as he impatiently waited for you to get used to his size. The cool breeze sorta calmed you down, taking your attention away from the pain nestled in your lower regions. “Fuck, can I move? Please, please let me move.”

Good god did he sound fucking hot begging.

“Yeah, y-you can- MMM! Fuck!” You threw your head back, pleasure spreading through your body. As soon as he heard the word “yeah” he immediately got to work on fucking your cunt until you were overflowing with his cum. You harshly bit your lip, holding in your embarrassing noises from his ears, however, he had no problem not hiding them from you. “Fuck, fuck, hah... don’t hide your moans from me. I wanna fuckin’ hear ‘em. Let everyone know who’s fucking you, who you belong to, and that you’re m-mine! Fuck!” He breathlessly moaned against your face, ramming himself into you repeatedly. Your hands were now on his back, clawing down his muscular back. He growled lowly into your ear, breathily cursing. “D-Damnit! Can’t... f-find it! Ahh... hah... fuck chicken wing, fuck yeah!”

His husky grunts were dangerously bordering animalistic. His pants were ragged, hips never faltering in movement, his wings flapping slightly and quivering every now and again. “Yeah baby? You like me fucking you? I’m gonna breed you so fuckin’ good. You’ll bare m-my clutch! You’re mine, ahhaahh! Fuck!” You were crying his name, clenching his back with your legs squeezing on either side of his waist. His cock was hammering against a bundle of nerves in your body you didn’t even know you had. “Hawks! Oh god! Please! Slow down-!” He pulled out quickly, leaving you a whimpered mess without that full feeling in your stomach. He flipped you over, hastily ramming himself back in you from behind, his wild thrusts getting harder. “Yeah, fuck yeah! There it is! Yeah! Gonna cum right in that womb if yours, you’re gonna be so round and pregnant with my kids! N-Nobody’ll ever come near you again! They’ll know you’re mine! My dove! My b-baby!”

His hot hands pushed your lower back, slamming you down against the couch and brutally fucking your tight pussy like no tomorrow, animalistic growls leaving his lips, teeth burying into your shoulder and neck. He was marking you as his. You were covered in his scent now, other men wouldn’t dare come near you now that you were filled with Hawks’ pheromones. “I’m gonna cum! Ahh! Hah! Hahn fuck I’m cumming Hawks! I’m cumming!” He rose his hand and smacked your ass harshly, the red tingling sensation spreading through your cheek. It felt so damn good. He grasped his hand over your stomach and pushed harshly. “You’re cumming, yeah? Gonna cum all over my cock? Gonna try and milk me are ya? Milk me, baby! Milk me so damn good and get every last drop of my fuckin’ cum in that ripe fertile womb of yours!”

“Hawks! Hah! Hah! Oh I’m cumming! Nhhh I’m c-cum...ming! Ahh!” You came harshly all over his still thrusting cock, your creamy juices spreading all over his cock and slipping down his balls full of his child baring cum. He didn’t stop yet, still bucking his hips through your orgasm even though you were still so sensitive. “Ohho! You’re such a good girl! So good! Fuck baby! Yeah, keep squeezin’ me! Keep fuckin’ squeezin’ meee! Agh!” He groaned deeply into your ear, desperately panting and grunting into your ear. You cried, physical tears running down your cheeks at the intensity of his brutal thrusts on your aching sore cunt. He slapped your ass again, squeezing it tightly afterwards with his nails creating crescents in your smooth skin. “F-Fuck I’m close! Yeah you want my cum? Tell me you want my cum deep inside you! C’mon baby, say it!”

“I want your cum Hawks! Mmm! Please! Please I want it! I wanna carry your kids! I want to be bred by you! Ah hahn! I can’t! Please!” You immediately regretted your words. His pace had become quicker, harsh pounds becoming desperate. You could feel his balls slapping against your inner thighs, a red itchy tingling bubbling up. His hands came around your neck, the other going to harshly rub your clit. You couldn’t contain the endless moans, cries, and screams of his name, his hero name to be precise. “Oh god! Oh my god! Feels so good! Mmm! Hawks, I-I’m gonna cum again!” He pants against your ear, snarling and growling about how good and round he’s gonna make you.

“Fuck I’m cumming! Hah, fuck!” He grunted loudly and released heavy shaky breathes, his raging hard on twitching inside your now gooey insides. You came harshly, your walls clamping down on him. He was fully embedded within you, balls pressed firmly against you, his scarlet wings twitching and flapping, stretching widely suddenly stiffening up. You could feel the warm spurts of his cum deep inside, forcing a low moan past your swollen lips. His wings happily drooped once he had finished, his head now hanging low, trying to catch his breath. “H-Hawks... I love you.” You finally admitted to him, watching intently to see his reaction to your words. He laughed huskily, his golden eyes raising back up to meet yours, still cloudy with lust. “You fuckin’ better. You’re my dove, now and forever, ya hear that? Now...”

“Let’s make sure you get pregnant.”

—

Pain was the first thing you were met with the morning after your undeniably passionate night with Hawks. Feathers were scattered all over the place, large blankets thrown everywhere, and some of his clothes were thrown over you. Incredibly confused, you sat up but quickly jolted back down as a searing hot pain shot through your body from your hips. “Woah there, chicken wing! Relax, you must be in a lot of pain. I don’t blame you after the harsh fucking I put you through last night.” The man who had put you in such pain walked into the room, shirtless and only in a pair of boxers. The bed dipped slowly as he sat on the bed, handing you a cool glass of water. You painfully sat up, gently taking the glass from his rough hands, thanking him quietly. “What the hell did you do while I was out?”

The pro hero looked around the room before coming to lay eyes on you again, scratching the back of his neck with a faint blush on his cheeks. “I uh, made a nest!” He answered bashfully. It was an incredibly rare sight to see him embarrassed. Uncomfortable sometimes, but never embarrassed. You looked around the mess and raised a brow. “Nest? Why the hell did you-“ You stopped once you remembered what had happened last night between the both of you and what you had realized. You blushed and threw the covers off yourself quickly, horrified at the sticky mess dripping from your insides, still. Just how many rounds had you gone with him last night? “Hah, Sorry. I just couldn’ hold myself back. My ruts are really bad, which is why I always take a week off.”

“You didn’t have to cum inside me this much Hawks...” You said and cringed at all the fluids dripping out of your abused cunt. You didn’t notice, but his wings shivered, ruffling up a bit at the sight of your leaky pussy, until they settled down again. “It’s your fault ya know? Makin’ me so damn jealous I had to claim you for myself. Claim you before someone else took you.” Your cheeks reddened slightly, and you looked to the side, your heart racing. Of course, he could feel your sensitive heart racing, and slowly leaned over, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips. Your eyes widened in surprise, melting into his sweet kiss. There was no sexual intention behind the kiss, only a reassurance that you didn’t have to worry about speaking your true feelings, that he already knew you loved him. “You’re my baby bird now. You’ve upgraded chicken wing. Congrats.”

“How many levels are there with you?” You laughed, enjoying this sweet moment with your new lover. He laughed and hopped into bed beside you, pulling you close to him in your little nest. His hands ran over your flat stomach slowly, cooing and flapping his wings lightly. “A lot more, step up your game, baby. You good though? How do you feel knowin’ you have the most popular hero’s cum inside of you. Mixin’ with all your fertile eggs to make my fuckin’ kids.” He growled possessively and wrapped his wings around you protectively, kissing your head and over your face. You couldn’t help but turn red at his words, embarrassed by how blunt he is. “Do... do you really want to have kids Hawks? I mean... we just started... d-dating...”

“Who cares the order, as long as you’re mine and that little bundle of feathers inside you is all mine, order can go fuck itself.” You rolled your eyes, flicking his arm gently. His whistling and cooing got louder the more he cuddled you, his lips peppering your face with kisses. “Ya know they already have story’s about us? They got my whole ‘top bird’ thing on video.” He seemed quite happy with it. The president of the HPSC would not be happy about this once she found out. But knowing Hawks, he couldn’t have given two fucks about it. He raised your chin, smirking smugly. “I also tweeted that we’re dating and that you’re mine, and that we’re gonna have chicks, and that all those other guys better stay away or I’ll kill ‘em.”

You rolled your eyes. “You jealous bird...”

[byulsgrease]

if you arent too busy, can you write a idol!hwasa x idol!reader, wherein they both have to practice with each other for a special stage. However on the first meeting they become starstruck and cant believe somethings are real, but soon warm up to each other?

i'm not terribly busy but this still took a while anyway oops - sorry this took so long anon! here you go :D

if anyone has requests for the other members hmu cuz I've got 2 more hyejin reqs after this one (not that I'm complaining)

"who says we can't do something on our own?"

(hwasa x idol!reader, ~1.2k words)

cw: food + alcohol mention (y'all know how it is)

I named someone Minjeong - it's not Aespa's Winter, idk anything about 4th gen gg's - 민정 is my Korean name so it's just what came to mind

"Hey, wake up. You've gotta see this. GET UP," a voice piercing through the fog of your sleep.

What a rude awakening. Your shoulders being shaken vigorously by a pair of small hands meant they belonged to none other than Minjeong, your youngest group member. You rolled over to glare menacingly at her with one eye open, trying to pull your brain out of the slumber. All you could see was the bright light of her phone shining in your eyes - a video of some kind. But then you heard the audio:

"Have you seen the clip?" asked the interviewer.

"Yes, my members and many MooMoos made sure I saw it"— Moos? Oh, it's Hwasa. WAIT. Both your eyes flew open as you sat up and snatched Jeongie's phone out of her hand to stare at the video. Your mind immediately flashed back to the interview you did last week - they asked who you most wanted to collaborate with, if there were no limitations. Your ears started to heat up at the sheer thought of the flustered mess of an answer you gave - of course you said Hwasa. Both of you debuted relatively close to each other, within a year, but never interacted much over the years. Mamamoo as a group was a force to be reckoned with, but there was just something about Hwasa specifically. You mostly just admired her unique singing voice and undeniable stage presence, and her relentless drive to always be herself in an industry constantly trying to fit women into a box.

Finally snapping out of re-living that embarrassment, your attention turned back to the phone in your hand. The interviewer must've asked her to send a message in response to you, because you couldn't believe that she was waving and saying, "How haven't we gotten to know each other better over all these years? I'd love to work with you on something sometime," curtly dipping her head in a slight bow.

"SEE? You needed to see that," Minjeong rushed to say, full of energy. "And close your mouth, your jaw's on the floor," jokingly pointing.

You side-eyed her and shut your mouth. "Is this what Loco felt like when she called him during Hyena on the Keyboard?" you wondered aloud.

"At least she's not calling you while on camera," she commented, knowing full well that you'd probably embarrass yourself again if she did. "But hey, at least she noticed you! Can I have my phone back now?" It would be a dream come true to collaborate with her, but cross-company collabs... always a pain. that couldn't be helped. The fantasy abruptly ended with demands from your rumbling stomach. Done with your what-if's, you placed the phone back in your maknae's outstretched hand to get up and make breakfast.

~~~~

With award show season rolling around, the crazy scramble of rehearsing for special live stages without leaking sets and collabs began. Checking your email that morning showed a schedule to record the backing track for a special live stage, but that was it. With who? You texted your members a screenshot, but they all told you that block of time in their schedule was empty. A solo stage? The solo mini-album you released this cycle did relatively well, the title track got a music show win, but not a multi-week chart-topper by any means. Possibilities turning over in your mind, you stepped out from your place to head to the company, totally in the dark about what was in store.

The recording studio always smelled the same along with the couches, a comfort for all the insanely long nights and crack-of-dawn early mornings over the years. With a bit of time to kill, you plopped down on one and gingerly patted the worn cushions as some kind of symbolic thank-you for supporting you (literally).

A hesitant but loud knock sent your gaze directly to the door. Watching it slowly open, you leaned forward to see who it was. Needless to say, your jaw fell to the floor again as you clapped a hand over your gaping mouth, eyes widening. Like a soldier obeying a command, you immediately stood up as straight as possible and bowed profusely at Hwasa, sporting a very similar expression on her face (which you failed to notice, your mind running a million miles a minute).

After a series of frantic bows and miscellaneous utterances to each other, she spoke. "It's nice to finally meet you," she said with calm, surveying your frenzied state. "I guess we're granting that collab wish from your interview, huh?"

The red-hot embarrassment leapt to your face. "I...I definitely made a fool of myself answering that question. And our maknae showed me your interview clip too, which was cool, but never did I think it would actually happen," you stammered. I should probably stop talking.

"Well, here I am," she half-smiled coolly. "Let's get started, I'm really looking forward to finally work with you on this," a gleam in her eye and a hint of excitement in her voice.

The studio suddenly felt a lot smaller with her in it, despite there only being your managers, the producer, and the both of you - less people than you and your members alone. Both of you remained relatively quiet the whole time, rather unsure of what to say or talk about. You watched enough MMMTV to know that all the members on their own were shyer than together, and Hwasa knew the same was true for you. But the work basically took care of itself, seamlessly taking turns in the recording booth, witnessing each other's work style and process. The both of you knew your way in front of a mic, seasoned professionals by now. Upon wrapping up, you bowed politely to each other after a quick exchange of KaTalk info, a short and sweet goodbye.

That was... anticlimactic. I mean, it's finally happening - I can't believe it. But maybe I was too idealistic about maybe creating a meaningful relationship with her outside of work... What does she think of me?

~~~~

In the days leading up to the collab stage, you kept going back and forth on whether to reach out or not, despite now being in possession of her contact info. What would you even say? Thoughts of a witty one-liner or relatable meme came to mind, but maybe she'd assume the worst - that you were clout-chasing, or something. Anxieties abuzz, your phone vibrated in your pocket. The KaTalk notification sprawled across your screen. Speak of the devil, it's her.

"Hey, awards season has me stressed. I know you must pretty busy right now too, but I somehow get off early tomorrow if you wanna grab dinner after work?" You had to reread that one. Oh, what? She's inviting me?

Trying not to be weird about responding too quickly, you typed out, "Wow, yeah, that sounds great! ^^ wait, your company doesn't care about you going out to eat during award season?"

"nah, they stopped having that kind of control over us a while ago, we are the money-maker of the company, after all 😏"

"so I guess this means they don't check your phone either ㅋㅋㅋ"

"nope :)"

You proceeded to set a time and place to meet, someplace with meat.

In the process of feasting on an inordinate amount of gopchang imbued with a splash of beer, you learned a fair amount about each other. You talked career, professional aspirations, the weird habits of your members, and more. What surprised you most was the amount of things she already knew about you, having admitted to watching some of your behind-the-scenes content after seeing your interview clip.

"Ah... I'm sorry if I came across as distant during that first recording session," she confessed, pausing to sip her beer. "I honestly didn't know what to do with myself, I felt a little star-struck."

"Oh what?? I felt the exact same, so no worries - and sorry if I came off similarly distant," you rambled back. A bit of silence fell between you, acknowledging the mutual sentiment. You spoke up after a bit, "Thanks for inviting me out tonight, I didn't realize how much I needed this."

"Thank you for making the time, I had fun getting to know you better," she articulated with a smile. "Maybe it'll make the collab stage better," she added on jokingly. You responded with a nod and expression of mutual affirmation.

~~~~

After that, messaging each other became a regular occurrence, that gopchang outing having broken the ice. Honestly, you tried your best to talk about anything besides work, but the baseline of shared understanding connected you in a way that came more naturally than it did with your non idol friends.

You stood across the way from her at the sound check for the final stage, dressed in joggers and slides. Funny to think that you'd be recording this for real in a couple hours, making eyes with the blinking red light on the cameras surrounding you. It sucks that fans wouldn't get to experience the energy and atmosphere of the performance - Hyejin alone is one thing, but adding someone else into her stage presence? Unmatched. There's nothing quite like a live performance - and while you knew everyone in the industry dealt with the consequences of the pandemic, it certainly took a toll to perform and not feel the energy from fans. But realistically, nothing you could do about it. The sound check went over smooth like butter. The stage chemistry came flowing naturally between you both, even when bare-faced and dressed in just sweats.

And when the time came for the actual filming, you both absolutely killed it, an upbeat mash-up of TWIT and your title track. At the very end came a sliver of hesitation before throwing your arms around each other with a big smile for the ending fairy, proud of the work you accomplished together, and a mental fist-pump to yourself for making friends with one of the industry's finest.

Once again walking to a restaurant that served mostly meat to celebrate, you playfully proposed, "We... should do that again sometime." A little puff of air came out her nose in amusement.

"Yeah, we should. Too bad we're gonna have to wait a whole cycle before we can release anything else together again," she sighed longingly.

"Who says we can't do something on our own?"

[bigskydreaming]

I kinda wanna fucking scream, so here, have a offline bullshit rant post.

So I’ve literally been trying to get my stupid fucking meds for over a MONTH now at this point, which I’m sure you can all see like, my mood is just wooooonderful these days. Not an excuse, casual reminder that yeah you do gotta take care of your own space so if my mood is dragging anyone down, I’m totes on board with blocking or unfollowing or y’know, burning me in effigy or something. Okay maybe not that last part. But still. You get it. And its not even that like, I need mood stabilizers per se, lol, so shout out to the armchair diagnosticians helpfully peppering my inbox still in their quest to oh so slickly be like ‘hey you’re a hot mess, take your hot messness away from tumblr’ like lol, didn’t ask.....nah, its mostly the perpetual lack of sleep and chronic pain issues that I have zero distraction from when my specific combo of meds isn’t able to let me actually weaponize my ADHD properly and power through that. Its a whole thing. Whatever. Just go with it.

POINT IS. So I’ve been trying to do this for over a month now, first obstacle was even just getting the money together for my refill appointment which is a whopping $150, because I have to pay out of pocket for mental health stuff these days because I had to switch my insurance over to something that paid out more heavily for physical benefits like my jaw surgery.....and because of the pandemic, and how many psychiatrists in my area and that I could actually reach aren’t taking new patients during the pandemic since most of them are conducting business virtually still, like, I have barely any resources for seeking out and trying new psychiatrist offices in the meanwhile that might charge less and I’m kinda stuck with the one I have because the last thing I can afford is to have like, NO psychiatrist at the moment, y’know?

So first I had to have that to even BOOK the appointment, which took forever because rent and food are a joy to accrue when you can barely manage to function as an actual employee of the capitalist machine ahfsklhflkahflakf, but so then I did that and like, got an appointment put on the books for August 19th. That was the soonest they could fit me in back when I paid them for my appointment about a week and a half ago. No, two weeks ago now? Eh, time is fake. ANYWAY, so that wasn’t gonna work for me, so basically the entirety of last week was devoted to constantly calling and trying to check in every other hour to see if they had any sooner cancellations I could take, because for whatever fucking reason, they just ‘don’t do’ a cancellation list wherein they call the next person on the list once they have a cancellation. Whatever.

So finally got a cancellation slot with a virtual appointment last Saturday night at random as fuck 8:40. Okay cool. Most of my refills are fairly simple, no real changes, but two are controlled substances so like, they have to do their due diligence and go through the proper protocols before giving me another prescription to one or whatever. Fine. Okay.

So I call the CVS they sent the prescription for my ADHD med to, the very next morning. One of the controlled substances, and the key med to like....making me functional instead of a rambling disjointed whirlibird of a thought emitter. Problem is, that medication is on back order. Won’t be in until Tuesday. Ugh. Okay, fine. Nothing I can do about it, because while the specific provider I spoke to in order to GET my refill prescriptions was taking an appointment the night before, the actual offices that schedule appointments and connect patients through to their providers was closed for the weekend, so I couldn’t even ask for them to send the scrip somewhere else.

SO. I go back to the CVS on Monday, hoping that maybe it came in early because not like I can do much else in the meanwhile. Course its not there, but oh well. I toy with the idea of calling to ask my provider to send the scrip to a different pharmacy (only had it sent to this one cuz its within walking distance to me, and since I can’t drive for medical reasons and Uber’s are expensive as fuck, just for errands, like, even though walking is sooooo not fun for me physically, like it is what it is). I decide against it because here’s another fun fact about this controlled substance....for security reasons, pharmacies don’t have to tell people over the phone if they have it in stock or not. Like, they won’t just say no we don’t have it in stock - I mean, they WILL say that, but that doesn’t actually mean anything because that’s what most of them say about that particular medication no matter whether or not they DO, and then just cite security protocols, so you have to actually GO to the store in question to ask them and even get a real answer to whether or not they even HAVE it in stock to FILL a prescription if its sent over. And no, the provider won’t just send scrips into several different pharmacies at once and just be whichever has it in stock can fill it - because again, controlled substance.

SO. I decide its not worth it to try getting the scrip sent over somewhere else, because I’d have to at least waste money on an Uber to even travel to various pharmacies and even check if they CAN fill it sooner than this one, when at least this place will have it in tomorrow. Its just one more day at this point.

Except then I go back on Tuesday. Oh sorry, don’t know why that other person told you we’d have our order in today, our shipments of that medication don’t come in until Wednesdays.

So I go back Wednesday. Success! They have it in stock. I go to pay, pulling out my goodRx coupon that was just printed out that morning, specifically citing the price for CVS at Target. The pharmacy manager says sorry, we don’t honor that coupon here for controlled substances like this one. I say: record scratch? He’s like yeah, that’s at the discretion of individual pharmacies, and we don’t honor that price for this specific medication, because we don’t want to attract customers only coming here to get that medication filled for that price. (This pharmacy is right at the edge of Inglewood and Culver City, for anyone who is familiar with those neighborhoods. The implications are exactly as they appear to be). So I’m like, what’s the regular generic price? He quotes me something that’s $180 more than the coupon, and thus $180 more than I have since I was focused totally on getting THIS amount ASAP, so I could get these meds so I could do more work and make more money. You see the train of thought. I’m like well that’s awesome, I don’t have anything close to that. Hey. Weird question. Why did nobody I talked to the past three days in a row that I’ve walked into this store in person to request this refill, like, mention this little tidbit about not honoring this coupon so instead of waiting for a backorder that would do me no good, I could have been spending that time having my prescription transferred somewhere that WOULD honor it?

He’s like, well did you mention to any of them that you’d be using a goodRx coupon for this particular medication? I said, yup. He said, you sure? I said well the specific process each time was I came in, I asked if this medication was in, they said what’s your name and date of birth, I provided that info, they said are you paying out of pocket, we don’t have valid insurance info for this on file for you, I said yup paying out of pocket with a goodRx coupon, they said *clickety clack of the keyboard* nope, sorry, we won’t have this medicine in until Tuesday, I mean Wednesday. 

He’s like, well you must be misremembering or they would have told you at the time that we don’t take GoodRx coupons on this medication. I’m like, dude, it was you. It was literally you that I spoke to two of those three times, right here at the counter, in person. I’m gonna go ahead and trust my memory of those interactions and what was said there over yours since you don’t actually remember having talked to me two times in the last three days. He’s like, I gotta go help another customer. There is no other customer. I leave. Fun day for everyone.

So then I call around town to at least check which CVS will actually honor the coupon I have and the price that I can afford to pay it at. I don’t bother asking if they even have the medication in stock because I know its not guaranteed to be a CORRECT answer, but at least I can see who accepts this damn coupon. Also, reason I’m only trying big brand pharmacies instead of smaller, hole in the wall ones is because again, controlled substance, and I know from experience that the bigger brand pharmacies are at least more likely to have that med in stock whereas most smaller ones tend to run out very quickly as they usually only get enough for their existing/regular customers and a little extra.

I find a CVS five miles away - not walkable, gonna have to Uber. Call my psychiatrist office again to ask them to transfer the scrip, front office says they’ll send the request to my provider, who usually checks and fulfills such requests in 24-48 hours. I’m like okay cool, can I get a phone call to let me know when that happens, so at least I know when to check back to follow up if it hasn’t happened yet for whatever reason? They’re like no, the pharmacy will send you a text or call when they get the prescription sent over and you can take it from there with them. I’m like okay, but I’ve done this a bunch of times and know from experience the pharmacy does NOT in fact always call or text, so is there a certain time to follow up to inquire if the provider has already sent the scrip and the pharmacy SHOULD have it by now or if the delay is on the provider’s end? Front office is like yeah no. I’m like, swell.

So that was yesterday. I call the pharmacy (which I still don’t even know if they have the medication IN STOCK to fill the scrip even once they GET the scrip, and won’t until I can actually Uber out there, but one thing at a time at this point) at like 9 pm, they’re a 24 hour pharmacy, and they’re like nope, we got nothing (this is after spending an hour and a half on hold to even TALK to someone at the pharmacy). Called them again today at noon, still nada. Technically I have another 29 hours before the window in which the provider is supposed to send the refill scrip to this new location, before I can be like, okay so they still haven’t done it, can we send him a nudge or another request. The 24-48 hour window will only actually EXPIRE after their offices close on Friday meaning it’ll be Monday before I can even actually REACH someone again to ask them to send the scrip again, if the pharmacy hasn’t ACTUALLY gotten it by Friday night, and pessimistically, I’m not super inclined to assume that they will at this point. 

I’m antsy, irritable, hungry because I don’t even know for SURE sure if the new pharmacy will ACTUALLY honor the coupon or say no sorry we don’t do that here either, whoever told you that was wrong, or if they’ll even actually have it in stock versus I’ll have to have it sent somewhere else AGAIN, so I have to pinch every penny possible in order to ensure I have the most money possible once my prescription IS filled in case the price is more than I expected again or in case I have to take Ubers there or further than I expected or basically....shit happens that I don’t expect. And this is what I’m basically spending all my time doing instead of working, because trying to get work done in this state is like....the harder I try to make it happen, the less it actually gets done, so I try and prioritize this and its roadblock after roadblock dragging out and wasting my time, and like yeah, I can post and shit while I’m doing this aka sitting on hold or walking around town trying to get shit filled because its fine if I ramble incoherently along the way in posts, but actual WORK work requires like....fucking coherency and succinctness and not having to stop and start every five minutes to call someone else, and oh yeah, being able to power through migraine spikes. And just.

I’m very annoyed about anything and everything to do with this shit. The hoops you have to jump through to even get the stuff that like....actualizes your hoop jumping ability, is just....*gnashing of teeth*

Anyway. So that’s my offline bullshit rant. Yay. The end.

[1ddotdhq]

🐕 Sun 25 Oct ‘20 🌶

Well it sure is SUNday isn’t it? We woke up to a hidden Reels from HSHQ (that has since been taken down) that showed a *golden* retriever swimming in the blue blue sea with Golden playing in the background. HSHQ has made a Habit (that they can’t break) of hiding media and random phrases in their source code, the most recent one in circulation being:  “Jewel-coat migration headed to Eroda!” within the Eroda site’s code. Fans quickly speculated that the dog in the video might be @/goldenloutriever on instagram, but I have no clue what brought that on, because there is no indication on the dog’s instagram nor on HSHQ’s instagram that would lead me to that conclusion. The best I can give you is that Harry seems to have taken a page out of Eleanor’s book and really embraced the dog content - he knows what we like! And THEN HSHQ dropped the official teaser AND the drop date of the music video! It drops tomorrow, 10/26? WHAT TIME asked Twitter with a worldwide trend. HSHQ ignored us all. The teaser trailer shows Harry running in a dark tunnel, I’m assuming chasing the sun. I would say that this time, he looks VERY ready to run! 

But Harry isn’t the only one with content to debut! LIAM put out his newest “show which has no name” on YouTube, and went live on instagram (wearing a headband that rival’s 2013!Louis’) right before the premiere! He went live with a young fan who ran a 1D fan instagram account and gave her some tickets, talked about not having seen the Golden music video, yet (me: YEAH NEITHER HAVE I UR NOT SPECIAL) and mentioned that Iron Man was his favorite avenger (“...after the sacrifices he made - for us all” hmmm, yup yup, totally, I remember that time Thanos came and made us disappear). He was also told by the chat to “Call Louis”, to which he promptly responded, “Louis was meant to call me a couple of days ago and he hasn’t yet...Louis where are you?? If you’re creeping around my Instagram live again, just. Give me a call”. Twitter then took it upon themselves to remind Louis and trended LOUIS CALL LIAM. Louis, always knowing what’s being said about him, took to twitter to say, “Answer your phone then dickhead @/LiamPayne”. Soooo...does this mean they’ve been playing phone tag?? Could timezone differences have anything to do with this? *Corneilus voice* whoooooo knooooowwwwssss…. 

And! In the roundup we got to hear a bit more about Cornelius! It started as an idea that he and Conor had “coming home after work one night” (if you’re counting - and I am - this is the second time he’s mentioned living with Conor) and that he thought it would be funny if there were a ghost haunting the place asking about the show. They tried out different names (first Peter), but settled on Cornelius as it tied back into an old 1D joke where Louis dared Niall to thank "Cornelius the Trombone player" but there never was a trombone player. So he was a ghost, Get It? Sigh, I love Liam’s sense of humor. In other round-up news, opener Carly Gibert will be zooming in from LA, though Tom Felton (“love ya, Big T!”) will be there live. He talked about how he’s known Tom for years, meeting at one of the HP premiers, though he wasn’t a big fan at the time, “I wasn't a massive fan then, it's just as I went along - you know how it goes - that I became a MASSIVE fan, but I already knew all of them". Okay, no need to rub it in Liam! But, speaking of fans, he thanked one on his live (twitter handle @/modeftziam), calling them “a good friend of mine”, and praising the awesome instagram filter that they made! He says that he sees their content on his timeline often, and loves it, and to go follow them. I ADORE (a door haha) how Liam treats his fans, it’s always so kind. Kinder, even, than he treats himself sometimes: he went in a bit on the behind the scenes video that Hugo put on their Instagram story about last month’s Esquire shoot, saying he was "super super hungover I’d partied all night the night before...you can see the drunkness on my face there". I mean, I hadn’t noticed it BEFORE he pointed it out, but, um...yeah he’s not wrong. I hope that, going forward, he treats himself more gently, because, as we all know HE’S GOLDEN TOO! 

And was Louis done tweeting after he told Liam off? No! He wasn’t! He went on to answer a fan about a child who really liked Louis’ music. Louis told the fan, “This is a beautiful story. Send my love to your gorgeous little lad. You’re both welcome to any show. Would love to meet the little lad. You’re an incredible mother, keep your head up!” The fan he replied to was NOT the mother of the child, but instead a 17 year old who had translated the story, which she had explained, but he clearly missed.  Who’s gonna take him up on the free ticket, d’you think? He also - once again - recommended the Red Hot Chili Peppers, once in a reply, and then went nah, I gotta put this on main, and posted a tweet with a link to the same liveshow, saying, “Anyone who’s missing live music. Watch this top to bottom...Incredible.” And he answered a question about the Social Dilemma, a documentary about the effects of social media, saying, “...Anyone who hasn’t seen it should watch it. Food for thought.” 

Niall described his COVID experience as “a lot of finger pointing, ankle injuries, and naked Instagram”. This time, can we please trend #DONTstripitdownNiall? They chatted a bit about the song (“ a delicate song...about divorce”) and Niall’s involvement (“I wouldn’t have been upset if she’d had said no [to having him on the song”), and they urged young US voters to get out the vote! Which, yeah! Please! And Zayn joined in the fun, tweeting “@UFC mashallah Khabib 🙌🏽”. The word mashallah is an Arabic phrase that means “what God has willed” and expresses appreciation, joy, praise, or thankfulness. Khabib is a boxer who has just announced his retirement. So, in the way that we often thank the guys for their hard work, Zayn was just showing off his fandom appreciation!  And, in Z’s extended universe Gigi also joined the Get Out Vote efforts by saying, “I voted absentee last week with my daughter next to me for an America I wanted her to see...”. Did it tell us anything about her daughter? Nope! Not even her name!

[aggressive-positivity-network]

How do you think the mercs would react to engineer getting really tired and doing something absolutely idiotic? Like Engie don't lick the soap it won't taste good sweetie (totally not inspired by the fact ive done this same thing while exhausted)

Also your hcs are great!! They all seem super thought out and they're a thrill to read! Your writing is... Ok no word seems sufficient to describe it! It just too good!

Askers like you make my day! Thank you so much! Sorry if this is a little short, but I’m still working on the relationship ones, which take forever to write.

Scout:

“Hey, uh, Engie...buddy...you good?”

“Listen, I’m the only merc around here that does stupid stuff like that...you’re one of the smart guys, remember?”

Pretends to yawn so that Engie will feel more tired and go to bed faster.

When that doesn’t work - Engie doesn’t pay much attention to his surroundings when he’s working - he asks Sniper for help.

Sniper:

“Aw, bloody ‘ell, ‘as he gone into one of his fits again?”

‘Fits’ meaning bouts of creative invention that can last anywhere from several hours to a couple weeks.

Sniper waves a hand in front of Engie’s face, but to no avail.

“Nah, mate, he’s outta this world. All off in his own universe. There’s nothin’ that can bring him out now.”

Suddenly Medic walks by, and the pair practically pull him in to help.

Medic:

“Hm...zhere’s only vun thing that can avaken zhis building beauty!”

Medic wraps his arms around Engineer’s neck. No response.

Head on the shoulder. Nothing.

Chin resting on top of head. Nope.

Tugging on his collar. Still nada.

Finally, Medic uses his secret weapon: the cheek peck.

Engie still doesn’t look up - in fact, Medic has to pull his arm away from almost putting his hand on a sparking wire, something that an alert Engie would never do.

“Ach! Engie! Dummkopf! Vhat are you doing?!”

Suddenly, Spy peeks his head in as he walks by, but Medic grabs him by the tie.

“I need zhis vorktable for my experiment, and ve have all tried our luck. Any bright ideas?”

Spy:

“Why must I always find myself in these situations? Surrounded by idiots, waiting for my assistance.”

A murmur of complaints all around, but no one contradicts him. They still need a pair of fresh eyes.

Spy snaps in front of Engie’s face.

“Laborer? Do you mind coming down to earth so the good doctor can commit his nightly atrocities?”

No answer. Not even a look.

Spy thumps Engineer’s hat several times. Then knocks. Then takes it off completely. Still no reaction.

Spy has been getting increasingly more frustrated, as he has been waiting to unwind all week, and this is keeping him from a glass of scotch and a good magazine.

“Did your Texan weed of a mother never teach you manners? Or did she not know any herself? She most likely had yet to learn her alphabet, much less any sort of etiquette.”

Scout cringed, Sniper pulled his hat over his eyes, and even Medic put a hand on his bonesaw. You never talked about Engineer’s mom. Scout almost got a wrench through his forehead when he walked into Engie’s workshop in the middle of a Yo Mama joke.

This happened to be an exception, because Engie still stared blankly at his project. This infuriated Spy, whose sharp tongue usually had a much bigger impact.

“LOOK AT ME WHEN I’M TALKING TO YOU, YOU SLACKJAWED SCREW MONKEY!”

Spy gave Engie a stinging, backhanded slap.

Engie scarcely stumbled.

Spy roared in rage and walked out, using his cloaking device so he wouldn’t have to bear a walk of shame. He was also holding his raw hand, which was hurt from the slap.

Demo walked in right after, rubbing his eyes and looking really hung over.

Demo:

“Mmph...whasall this, then? Aye...onea those, eh?”

Demo, being the night owl that he is, had seen Engie in his zone before - in fact, he was usually the first to snap Engie out of it.

“Comere, I’ll show ya how it’s done.”

Demo took the empty beer bottle he was holding and cracked Engie over the head with it. It shattered on impact.

“Don’tcha worry, lads, that hard hat ‘a his is made for more than a strong drink.”

Demo laughed at his own joke, then slowly got serious as he realized Engie still wasn’t reacting.

“Lad? Are ya...did anybody check for a pulse?”

Medic walked over and put two fingers on his neck. After a few minutes, his eyes went wide.

“No bloody pulse?! How the hell-!”

Pyro suddenly walked in, holding a bag of gummy bears.

Pyro:

He mumbles excitedly, then goes over to Engie.

She takes a red gummy bear, which are Engineer’s favorite, and holds it out to him.

No response.

Pyro laughs good-naturedly, as if he was joking about how silly Engineer was being. He put the gummy bear in Engineer’s mouth.

It fell out, but Pyro giggled and put it back in again.

It tumbled out once more, and Pyro cocked their head.

This whole process went on a few more times before Pyro decided to tap Engie on the shoulder.

When that didn’t work, he walked over in front of the table to look at Engie’s face, and hopefully get his attention.

Pyro took one look, started, then backed away slowly. After they had gotten a good distance, he ran to Medic and hid behind him, starting to cry.

Sniper translated: “He doesn’t look good...he doesn’t look like Engie...he didn’t even look...did I do something wrong?”

There was a rattling from above, and Soldier popped his head out of the vent and looked around.

Soldier:

“Morning, maggots!”

“It’s ten o’clock, mate...”

“You shut your godamn mouth before I write you up for insubordination!”

Soldier leapt down, took one look at Engie, and grunted.

“Gone A.W.O.L, huh?”

Everyone nodded, albeit unsure.

“I’ll show you landlubbers what we did in the army...”

He very slowly crept up to Engineer, grinning. Everybody took a step back, just in case.

Finally, Soldier pounced, taking Engineer’s hat and replacing it with his own, whooping and laughing as he went back up the vent.

Everyone just stared at each other, and while they were all recovering, Heavy walked in, still in his nightgown.

Heavy:

“Team is all here...what is wrong?”

Everyone started talking at once, but Heavy just held up a hand.

“One at time. Doktor. What is wrong?”

“Engineer doesn’t have a pulse, he hasn’t reacted to stimuli, his facial expression doesn’t change...he is a dead man valking!”

Heavy just chuckled. “Engie just sleepy. Here. Heavy will take him to bed.”

Heavy picked Engineer up by the underarms, lifting him over his shoulder.

Before he knew it, Engineer was falling apart. Arms, legs, body. It all crumbled to the floor in a mix of wires and cogs.

Pure. Chaos.

Everyone was either screaming, crying, looking like they were about to vomit, or were trying to salvage the pieces.

Suddenly, they heard a yawn behind them.

“Well, howdy, y’all!”

Engineer:

After everyone had gotten over the shock and had made a huge hug pile, Engineer explained everything.

The Engie at the desk was a robot with a realistic skin suit on. In the dark and dusty workshop, no one had noticed the difference.

He was actually doing an experiment - something that resembled a “straight face” experiment they had done with children. He wanted to see how people reacted when there...wasn’t any reaction. His hypotheses were mostly correct - except for Soldier, put he was a random variable anyway.

Scout was mildly put off, Sniper and Medic came up with a logical solution, Spy was furious because of his job’s emphasis on reaction, Demo joked around until it wasn’t funny anymore and then just froze, Pyro was very upset, and Heavy tried to physically change the situation.

“It was all real interestin’...but it had to be a blind study. Sorry I had to worry y’all. It’ll never happen again.”

He looked down at his broken robot.

“Especially not with my Engiebot in pieces.”

Engineer told everybody goodnight, apologized one more time, said he’d make it up to them, and then went to his room.

Needless to say, everyone followed Engie to bed that night.

And he had a certain Frenchman to apologize to over a cold-shouldered breakfast.

***************

I’m a writer...can’t you tell? No, but seriously, by the time I realized it was spinning out of control, I had written too much to delete. I know it wasn’t exactly a normal response, but I just couldn’t resist! I just felt a really good story in this one!

Anyway, I’m sorry this took so long! I have an ask blog and a lot of requests coming my way, so I may be a little slower on the upkeep. But a lot of the requests are pretty short, so I should be able to knock them out.

@catbunblue302

[salmon-sushi]

single parent club | aobajohsai & fem!reader

summary: Oikawa’s gift from his fan club gives you the opportunity you never thought you’d experience.

genre: crack, lots of braincells lost here and platonic relationships!

words: 3.1k

a/n: guess who wrote this instead of listening to her online class? also @akasuns​ thank you for wanting to read more of my works 🥺 i’m really honored!!!

index

The early morning mist begins to clear, the rising sun casts a rosy hue across the morning sky and the birds begin chirping their morning melody to welcome a new day. Kindaichi breathes in the much needed fresh clean air, his eyes blinking blearily in an attempt to stay awake as he walks to the gym at the start of the Golden Week. He pushes the heavy metal doors of the gym using his right leg and sees the sun pouring through the windows of the school’s gym, making the gym glow in soft orange. 

“Morning.” 

Kindaichi yawns his greeting as he stretches his arms and back. Not hearing hollers from his teammates, he looks around the quiet gym, rubbing his arms when the temperature gets a bit chilly before finding the team’s libero and second year setter eating leisurely. He swears that he hears some sniffles from them, “What are you guys eating, Yahaba-san?”

The second year setter turns around and shoves a box of chocolates in Kindaichi’s hands, his voice muffled as he attempts to speak with his cheeks puffing like a hamster, mouth full of sweets. “Oimmffhmfmffh.”

Watari clicks his tongue in distaste as he shakes his head before sighing, “Don’t talk with your mouth full.” He raises his hand before slapping Yahaba’s back with a loud smack. Kindaichi pales when he sees Yahaba’s whole body shake, mentally reminding himself to never piss Watari off.

“What he means to say is that Oikawa-san gave us his gifts from his fanclub.” Watari explains while Yahaba wipes his suspiciously teary eyes with the sleeve of his shirt. “He said that he couldn’t possibly finish all of the chocolates anyway and that he didn’t want to share with the other senpais for some reason.”

Kindaichi picks up a piece of chocolate and twirls the confection around his fingers before popping it into his mouth. His eyes widen when the chocolate immediately melts in his tongue, the sweet taste, the creamy feel makes him feel like a newborn baby, “Hey, it’s pretty good.”

“Right?” Yahaba sniffs his nose, “Man, I want a cute girlfriend to give me one of these chocolates too. Hey, Watari, how do I get one?”

The libero’s smile becomes tight as his friend begins to nudge his side with his sharp elbow. Watari silently grips Yahaba’s wrist, which made Yahaba yelp in pain, “Not trying too hard would be a good start.”

Kunimi hums in agreement, making Kindaichi jump, “What the hell, when did you get here?” 

“I’ve been standing next to you the whole time.” 

Kindaichi awkwardly nods his head as he averts his gaze from his glaring friend. His hand reaches for more of the milky, buttery chocolate while leisurely talking about their upcoming training regime during the entire Golden Week.

“Aw man, I gotta admit those are the best chocolates I’ve ever eaten.” Yahaba sighs as he pats his stomach in satisfaction.

“Do you reckon Oikawa-san has more of those?” Kunimi asks excitedly. Kindaichi raises an eyebrow at his friend, whose impassive face is in contrast to his elevated voice.

“We can ask him when he gets back–”

POOF!

The gym’s metal doors are slammed open and you enter with a wide step while greeting loudly, a quirk you always did everytime you step inside the gym. You look around the empty space, only finding a cart filled with untouched volleyballs, the net hasn’t been set up yet and an empty box decorated cutely before discovering four babies in your school’s volleyball shirt. 

You suck in a sharp breath, feeling panicked and wondering if the coaches mentioned about bringing their children along to practice, which is impossible because they won’t be arriving until late afternoon. Walking slowly and cautiously towards the group of babies, you finally recognised the hairstyle of each child. You tilt your head in confusion, “Eh?”

“Is this a joke?” You asked yourself.

Just to be sure, you call each of their names loudly, making sure your voice resonates throughout the quiet gym. But only the babies reply in their gibberish language, which only confirmed your far-fetched theory. “They’re babies. I’m sure of it.” 

Looking around and making sure that nobody else is in the gym, you let out an excited squeal, “I’m finally able to realise my trashy novel fantasies!” Wiping a stray tear with a finger, you sniff, “I’m a single mother now!”

Placing a hand on your forehead, you twirl around dramatically before falling down in front of the babies with the grace of a swan on the gym’s floor, earning happy babbles and applause from them. You silently lament about wanting to wear a fluffy long skirt instead of the school’s tracksuit, just so that you could feel like Snow White and the four dwarfs– you mean, babies. You keep a neutral face as you silently creep your hands towards the unsuspecting Yahaba baby while the other three babies are focused on the empty box in front of them. Lifting your hands, you tickle the child as you coo at him, laughter filling the gym’s empty noise as the baby squirms under your mercy.

The remaining third years finally arrive and they greet you casually before stopping in their tracks. “Whose kids are they? The coaches?” Matsukawa asks as he shoves his hands inside his pockets.

Shaking your head, you hand a tired, red faced Yahaba to the middle blocker, who then awkwardly holds the baby in his arms, “Nope. Guess again.”

Hanamaki sends a glare to a scowling baby whose hair is parted in the middle, reminding him of a certain junior who refuses to move during practice, but he decides against it, “Nah, where are our little kouhais though?”

Your body slumps as you groan, rolling your eyes before Oikawa steps in front of you and points at the babies on the floor. “Now, now, [Name]-chan before you create your monstrous sounds–” 

“Hey!”

“–these babies are our kouhais, right?”

His question received no reply, but no objection either. Matsukawa silently settles the baby in his arms on the ground and slings a hand around Hanamaki’s neck before moving towards the exit. Iwaizumi crosses his arms and glares at the two friends, “And where do you think you’re going?”

Hanamaki raises both of his hands in a calming gesture, “We’re off buying food. For the kids.”

Matsukawa waves a hand with a smile on his face, “Want anything from Family Kart?”

The captain hollers that he wants onigiri, along with a few chocolate bars for their precious manager in case she decides to be a monster with all the groans she’s producing. Feeling annoyed, you pinch Oikawa’s side and flash a sweet smile when the captain cries in pain as Iwaizumi raises an eyebrow, “Didn’t you just eat breakfast?”

Oikawa smirks as he manages to slap your hand away, placing a hand on his hips as he tilts his head to the side, “This is why we’re different in terms of height, Iwa-chan.”

“Huh?”

Seeing Iwaizumi already raising his fist, you quickly stop both of them before Iwaizumi proceeds to demonstrate violence towards impressionable children. The last thing you need is a baby fight. Silently panicking, you begin to think of possibilities of baby injuries– you know next to nothing when it comes to treating injured babies. Worse, the babies are actually the first and second year regular players of the volleyball team and for them being stuck as babies in the start of Golden Week. “Imagine explaining this to the coaches!” you scream mentally.

Iwaizumi notices you beginning to lose your cool, he pats your back, “We’ll help you take care of them.”

“Only you, Iwa-chan!” Oikawa pipes in.

In your eyes, Iwaizumi is your saviour, while Oikawa is nothing but dust. You stick your tongue at the captain, in which he is happy to reply with his own while pulling his lower eyelid. Iwaizumi grits his teeth, his body tensing before he sucks in a deep breath. His body visibly relaxes and he exhales slowly, the tension in his face begins to fade and he looks calmer than before. “Right, only I will help you, [Name].”

“W-whoa, Iwa-chan,” Feeling demure, the blush on your face sears through your cheeks and for a minute, you think your face is on fire. Suddenly, Iwaizumi becomes dependable, not that he isn’t before but– “That’s so cool! I’m totally living the trashy novel plot!” 

Looking away shyly, you stutter your thanks to the boy. Oikawa huffs when he witnesses the interaction, taking out a ball and proceeds to throw it up in the air as he runs up to deliver a powerful serve.

“Oi, Shittykawa! We’re not practicing near babies.” Iwaizumi warns. The captain bites back his complaints and silently sits himself at the corner of the court, letting the ball drop and roll away freely. Seeing you and Iwaizumi being somewhat parental towards the first and second year babies churned something in his stomach. Watching you meekly hand over a Watari looking baby to Iwaizumi with rosy pink cheeks, Oikawa couldn’t help but groan, “Iwa-chan! Why are you helping [Name]-chan anyway?”

Both you and Iwaizumi turn to face Oikawa with unimpressed expressions. Feeling somewhat pathetic but his heart wouldn’t settle until he says what he has to say, Oikawa gestures his hands at you and the babies, “She’s a girl! Girls can take care of babies alone, right? Let’s practice!”

Iwaizumi widens his eyes in surprise before snickering, “Wow, Shittykawa. You just proved yourself to be a deadbeat dad.”

You’re also quick to rub the salt in the wound, cackling wildly, “Yeah, Oikawa.”

The captain gasps as he stands up, making his way towards Iwaizumi and sweeping babies Yahaba and Watari from his friend’s arms, “Hey! I’ve taken care of my nephew before and I can take care of Yahaba and Watari! Plus, they’re easier to care for~” he sings.

Iwaizumi looks doubtful when he sees Oikawa telling the babies that he wouldn’t be a deadbeat dad. Silently, he goes to Oikawa and helps him out by playing with the two babies with him. 

You gasp sharply in surprise after discovering Oikawa’s real intentions. Standing up, you poke a delicate finger to his chest, “So that’s your plan, Oikawa!”

The captain merely raised an eyebrow while looking at you amusedly. “Oh?”

“You’re planning to take my husband away with your single father act!” Oikawa yelps as your hair smacks his face when you turn around, looking at him over your shoulder before scoffing, “Disgraceful!”

Iwaizumi blushes when he hears you call him your husband, he splutters, “W-what, husband? [Name], I–”

Before the ace could take a look at your growing red face after your bold claim, Oikawa laughs high and mighty with a devious look in his eyes, “It seems that you’re not a slow shrew after all, [Name]-chan.” He runs behind Iwaizumi and grabs his biceps, “But it’s too late for you! Iwa-chan will fall for my single dad charms in no time!”

Iwaizumi glares at his friend as he starts to feel uncomfortable now that he is the center of the attention. “Oi, stop it, both of you.”

However, his words are ignored as you gasp in shock and grab babies Kindaichi and Kunimi, who look very happy to be carried in one arm each. You glare at Iwaizumi with tears in your eyes, making the latter deflate under your stare as you whisper, “How could you do this to me, Iwa-chan?”

You are touched when you feel two pairs of tiny hands pat your face, it's as if Kindaichi and Kunimi could feel your sombre mood, regardless of their age. You make your way to the other side of the court with the babies, making Iwaizumi push Oikawa away from his arm, trying to calm you down as you let out sniffles of your crying.

Oikawa stands still as he watches his friend patting your back awkwardly, that is until he sees a coy smirk gracing your smug face. “Ha, I win this round, Oikawa~” your eyes seem to say.

There is no way Oikawa is losing to you.

He tries to recreate a dramatic spin he saw in the soap opera his mother loves to watch but he fails miserably as he falls down with the elegance of a chicken trying to fly. But Iwaizumi wouldn’t bat an eye. Grumpily, he lifts himself up and smiles when both Yahaba and Watari clap their hands for him. “At least my performance is appreciated,” Oikawa thinks.

“Thanks, Yahaba-chan and Watacchi.”

Meanwhile, Iwaizumi then realises that you’re fake crying because at this point, your cheeks are dry and you’re only blubbering instead. He looks up at the gym’s ceiling and sighs heavily, “Why am I even friends with them?”

A sharp cry pierces the gym and Iwaizumi quickly looks at Oikawa’s corner of the court, finding both Yahaba and Watari crying. Oikawa starts to panic as he pats the babies’ backs but they are unrelenting. He bites his lip, “What’s taking Makki and Mattsun so long? We might need to change their diapers! Pants! Whatever!”

Feeling spiteful, you giggle at Oikawa’s predicament, “Kindaichi and Kunimi are literal angels! They would never cry–”

Tears burst forth like water from a dam, spilling from Kindaichi and Kunimi’s faces as they join the crying fest. 

Iwaizumi stares dumbly at the floor while Oikawa laughs as you panic, asking the babies if something’s wrong. He thinks of his position as the team’s vice captain. When he first accepted the position, he didn’t think much of it. In fact, his first impression towards vice captains is that they are usually the ones who did nothing at all. Looking at Oikawa who is all but happy to join the babies in torturing their manager, Iwaizumi thinks, “Shouldn’t the captains be responsible?”

Then, he glances at you whose hands are flailing around as you are near in tears, “Managers too.”

But no, his captain and manager are both general annoyances, however endearingly so. Iwaizumi debates lying down on his back again, to have a silent mental breakdown with the chaos in the gym as a background noise, but he decides against it. Remembering how Matsukawa, Hanamaki and you were crying for him to survive in public, he thinks it would be best if he just went through this now instead of dealing with more of Oikawa and your antics.

“I think they’re hungry.” Iwaizumi helpfully informs the two of you after clearing his throat several times. Blinking twice, both you and Oikawa perk up, running towards your bags. You rummage your bag and find several boxes of Pawcky, “I have some Pawcky with me!” 

“And I have spare milk bread with me!” Oikawa tells you. 

With Oikawa and your combined strengths, the both of you manage to feed the children together without any fusses. With Oikawa tearing the food into smaller pieces for the kids, you quickly fill up the bottles with water in case they become thirsty. Iwaizumi becomes speechless at the perfect teamwork between you and the captain. The babies then soon fall asleep and the both of you slump onto each other. Oikawa grins at you, “Phew, we make a pretty good team, [Name]-chan!”

You beam at him, “For once you’re right, Oikawa!”

The both of you pat each other’s back and sing praises to one another as Iwaizumi sighs tiredly while he rests his heavy body against the gym wall. “Great,” he grumbles. The gym has become considerably warmer, with the bright light pouring from the gym’s windows, making the floating dusts visible to his naked eye. 

POOF!

“Our children!” Both you and Oikawa scream in panic. Iwaizumi quickly stands up in action, coughing when the puff of smokes nearly engulfing the three of you. A familiar voice asks, “What, what happened?”

Watari rubs his eyes with his hands as the other three baby turned normal guys cough their lungs out from the smoke, he is met with the view of their manager and captain clasping their hands together, with tears streaming from their eyes. Oikawa holds your intertwined hands together and brings them near to his face, “Oh, [Name]-chan! They grow so fast!”

The dazed libero looks at the team’s ace questioningly, to which Iwaizumi only replied with a pitying smile, “Trust me, you don’t wanna know.”

Only then, Matsukawa and Hanamaki return from their hours-long worth of shopping for food. “You guys sure took your sweet time,” Iwaizumi says gruffly. Matsukawa averts his gaze from Iwaizumi’s scowl while whistling a tune as Hanamaki asks amusedly “Eh, they’re back to normal?”

“Normal from what?” Yahaba asks but his question is ignored by his senpais. Poor Yahaba.

As a sign of reconciliation, Hanamaki passes a bottle of banana milk to Iwaizumi, patting his back as Matsukawa passes bento boxes around to the team, “Thanks for the hard work, ace.”

A loud clap interrupts the warm atmosphere and Oikawa stands up with his hands on his hips, “Alright everyone, gather up!”

“We are already gathered, Oikawa.” Hanamaki snickers.

“Hush, you.”

You silently stand behind the captain with a resolute expression in your face as Oikawa begins his speech, “I have realised that [Name]-chan and I are not really responsible, personality-wise.”

The atmosphere turns serious, the faces of the team morph into surprise. 

“So, from this day forward,” you continue, “We’ll get our acts together and form a strong bond in order to guide this team to the nationals!”

“And crush the Ushiwaka bastard!” Oikawa adds.

Iwaizumi’s intuition rings “Dumbass alert! Dumbass alert!” but he shoves the thought away. However, Iwaizumi remembers the sheer chaos created by the two of you just moments ago, so he grabs a ball, just in case.

You nod at Oikawa and the captain holds your hand, raising it as he continues, “We will become co-parents to you guys!”

A fast ball hits Oikawa’s face before knocking off to your forehead. You cry at the burn on your forehead as Oikawa crumples to the floor, clutching his face in agony. 

“Iwa-chan!”

Extra:

You rub the reddening spot on your forehead, pouting at Iwaizumi, “Violence against a helpless woman? I thought you are better than this!”

However, Iwaizumi looks dead inside, his voice low, “At this rate, I don’t see you as a woman, [Name].”

You gasp along with Hanamaki and Matsukawa. Your heart beats faster than ever, “What does Iwa-chan think of me, then?”

“You’re more like a–” he pauses, contemplating his words. He looks at you and your red forehead, you really do look like a sad piece of work. He deflates, “–an annoyance. But not really.”

Oikawa raises an eyebrow as he slaps Iwaizumi’s shoulder, “Huh? You called me a bug once when I really annoyed you, Iwa-chan!” He then nudges Iwaizumi’s side, “You wanted to call her a bug, right? It’s okay. [Name]-chan is a big girl, she can take it–”

“Thanks, Iwa-chan.” you grab a tissue offered by Hanamaki. “Being a bug is cool too.” you cry, blowing your nose as both Hanamaki and Matsukawa gasp at Iwaizumi scandalously.

“Can we get to practice, now?” Iwaizumi asks, red faced.

[petri808]

We’ll Take Back Heaven a Nalu Yakuza Au

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |

A loud slam of the organization’s front door caused Levy McGarden to pop her head out of her own office. Curious, she walked down the hallway and saw a light on in her boss’s, Lucy Heartfilia. Had the noise been Lucy returning? That was strange because it was too early for the woman to be back so soon. The party should have kept Lucy out of the office until morning. Levy knocked at the cracked door before entering.

“Lu, why are you here? Are you okay?” Levy quickly added when she saw her boss’s forehead leaning on the table. “Did you drink too much?”

“No… I ran into Natsu, and we had a fight,” Lucy answered without lifting her head. “He just makes me so angry sometimes, so I stormed out of there.”

“Aww, Lu.” Levy walked over and put a hand on her friend’s head. “I’m sorry.” Both Lucy and Natsu were childhood friends of hers, so she knew the history between them. It was just like a made for television movie plot and hard to stay neutral in at times because she loved them both. “Do you wanna talk about it? Need a drink?”

Having heard the loud noise, another associate Cana Alberona also came looking for the source and stumbled upon the beginnings of the conversation. “Did I hear the word drink?” She popped her head into the office. “Oh, baby what’s wrong??” She questioned at seeing Lucy upset. Cana quickly joined Levy next to their friend. “Who do I gotta kill?”

“It’s just Natsu,” Lucy mumbled. “So, no killing.”

“Oh… him.” Cana plopped her butt onto Lucy’s desk. “Ya sure? I bet I could get one of my girls to take him out of your misery.”

“He wouldn’t be interested,” Levy piped in.

“Right… he’s still—”

Lucy sat up groaning, cutting them off. “That’s enough. I really don’t wanna think about that shit right now.”

“Fine, fine, then drinks it is. Relax, babe,” Cana playfully pushed on Lucy’s shoulder before plopping off the desk. “Then you’re gonna dish about tonight.” Cana always kept a stock of liquors at her desk. So, she grabbed a bottle of high quality flavored junmai daiginjo sake, glasses and set the girls up for a gossiping session.

It was reasons like this that really spoke to the heart of their organization. Everyone in the top level of this girl’s gang had known each other from childhood or high school. They were close, a found family of sisters who all had one thing in common— a real dislike for Japan’s outdated notions of gendered norms, well that and a desire to make money. But not in a conventional way. None of them wanted to work a boring office job only to what, be subservient to the male status quo? No, thank you. So, it had been Lucy who’d first approached everyone with the idea of creating their own high-end crime organization. It was amusing at first to think about an all-girl gang similar to the Yakuza… Oh, they all knew why Lucy came up with the idea to spite Natsu and the Yakuza’s rules, but it was an appealing idea. Everyone except for Levy’s family had some kind of ties to the Yakuza, so they were in essence raised in the lifestyle without ever being able to be a part of it because of their sex.

Together they brought their strengths into play and under Lucy’s business savvy thanks to her father, within just a short couple of years they were on the road to making a real name for themselves. Levy McGarden was at the heart of the organization as a tech person, and her skills in computer language is the reason they’re able to control a massively successful money laundering operation. Cana Alberona had great people skills, so she handled the escort services. Another, Erza Scarlet was the security expert who oversaw anything to do with the protection of their assets and employees. She also kept contacts with law enforcement. Mira Strauss handled the bookkeeping and financial side, and finally Juvia Lockser managed their soapland operation. Lucy herself held everything together but was the face of the group when dealing with knew contacts and clientele. Six primary women running the organization with underlings or regular staff to manage, they were nicknamed the Yosei girls because of the various fairy-type tattoos they all had somewhere on their bodies. Lucy preferred not to show hers to outsiders, but it was a pair of fanciful fairy-like wings that took up a large portion of her upper back. Natsu used to call her his angel back in the day…

The three girls sat huddled around Lucy’s desk after Levy dragged over a couple extra chairs.

“Seriously?” Cana knocked back a shot of sake and planted it on the table. “So, you didn’t have a chance to hit any marks?”

“Nope.” Lucy sipped from her glass. “Sure, I talked to some people, but I never made it past my first cocktail. He even blocked me from getting some action tonight from the hot bartender.”

Cana cringed. “That’s even worse!”

Levy giggled at her friend, “of course, you’d take offense to that Cana instead of the job.”

“Well,” Cana shrugged nonchalantly, “girls gotta take care of needs too, right? And if he was hot, that’s a real shame.”

The comment sent both Levy and Lucy into a giggle fit. Lucy may have started this out irritated but leave it to her friends to bring her out of her despair.

“Oh,” Lucy sighed and finished her glass, “the guy Loke was a total playboy too. Perfect for a no strings attached night.”

“Loke?” Cana questioned. “Orange hair and glasses?”

“You know him?— of course, you know him,” Lucy chuckled. “Why am I surprised.”

“I’ve seen him at other parties bartending. Flirts with all— the pretty girls. Very easy to get into bed, and not bad while in it. I got his number if you want it.”

“Natsu scared him pretty bad. I think Loke recognized him.”

“Hmm, that’s possible too. But hey, what Natsu doesn’t know…”

“Oh, my Kami, Cana! You are just too much sometimes!”

“Hey, just tryin’ to help out my bestie here,” she winked.

“Nah, I’m not in the mood tonight, Natsu really killed my joy.”

“He really thought that the guys there were gossiping about you?” Levy questioned. “Just because you didn’t have an escort?”

“Yeah, and you know even if he was right, he didn’t need to be a dick about it.”

Levy sighed, “he was probably right. It sucks, but that level of men, they look down on women like us. You provide a service, so to them they’re still using you which makes you beneath them.”

“And how dare a woman show up without a man by her side,” Cana rolled her eyes. “Oh well, less guilt for me when I’m taking their money,” she laughed.

Levy and Lucy laughed too, then Lucy raised a glass. “To taking their money! Cheers!”

“Cheers!” The girls clinked their glasses together and shot down their drinks.

“Speaking of escorts, how are things going Cana?” Lucy asked. They called their employees escorts because that’s the only service they provided. Think of them like high-end modern geisha without the traditional look. Their employed women provided companionship for events or business executives trying to look good and we’re trained well in hospitality, etiquette, and such to keep their dates happy. The women were highly compensated for what they did, so it was very lucrative for everyone. Sex was forbidden on the job and if a client ever tried to pressure an escort or roughed them up, they would be immediately barred from the service. However, if the infraction were bad enough, that’s when Erza would step in and handle things. The group was lucky this rarely took place because the male clientele they had wouldn’t want the shame of embarrassment either.

“Going great. We’re already getting booked up for the holidays and that still 4 months away. I guess they wanna make sure they can get certain girls before it’s too late.”

“Suckers.” Lucy snickered. “We’re using their own social norms against them, and they don’t even realize it.”

Between the three friends, they drank about half the bottle before slowing down. The conversation switched between work related topics, private lives, and back to Natsu until Lucy would switch the topic again. She knew of her buddy’s willful infatuation in her decades old battle with the man, but she just wasn’t in the mood to talk about it. Lucy still had a lot to process privately about the issues and though she loved Cana as a sister, Levy was the only one she’d really tell her deepest feelings to and now wasn’t the time to rehash anything. A few hours passed by when a knock at the door came. Another of their group was dropping by before heading out to work.

“Hey Juvia!” The three tipsy girls giggle at the same time.

“Wanna join us?” Cana questioned.

“Juvia would but she needs to check on Faerieland.”

“How is our soapland operation doing? Any problems I need to know about?” Lucy asked Juvia. The Faerieland bathhouse was the lowest level of their operations since flesh services were considered distasteful. But nevertheless, it was a highly profitable and legal one. What set them apart from all the others was the high-end quality of services offered to guests, providing both male and/or female “bathers” that clients could pay extra for to have a sexual experience. However, for that service, the client was required to be vetted by an inhouse doctor prior to a booking to make sure they were free of STD’s. Again, that was just one reason Faerieland was considered so high end and very exclusive. Some might have found it inconvenient, but most of the regulars appreciated the health factor. It’s what kept them coming back. All the employed bathers were screened regularly by an in-house doctor, and contrary to societal belief, were there by their own choice. So, the combination of anonymity, safety, and level of service kept the soapland business running with very little down times in between.

Juvia shook her head. “No problems, just busy due to the heat this time of year. Private bookings are scheduled out into next month.”

“That’s good to hear,” Levy smiled. “It’s nice that things have been running so smoothly.”

“Agreed,” Cana and Lucy chimed in.

“There is one thing Juvia should tell Lucy.” Her voice lowered, hesitant. “Mr. Natsu has an appointment booked for the end of the month. And he… just made it tonight.”

Lucy rolled her eyes and her voice dripped with irritation. “So, who’d he sign up to bang?”

“Nobody. Mr. Natsu only booked the deluxe bath and massage package. No sex.”

“Oh—” Lucy caught her surprise before she could show it, waving her hand nonchalantly as if she didn’t care. “W-well good for him. Not that I care if we’re making money of it.”

“Juvia is so relieved! She was worried you wouldn’t like him using our bath house.”

“It’s rare that he does,” Cana tapped her chin. “Hmmm, I wonder why he made the appointment tonight of all days…”

Levy slapped Cana on the arm, glaring at the woman to behave and Juvia just stood there wide-eyed and confused.

“What?!” Cana laughed. “I thought it was funny.”

“Ha-Ha,” Lucy mocked Cana. “What Natsu does is his own business and it’s not like he was trying to relieve himself tonight, the appointment is what, two and half weeks or so away? I’m not gonna lose sleep over it.”

“Okay… Juvia is confused but needs to go. Someone can fill Juvia in tomorrow.”

“Sorry, Juvia,” Levy apologized for the others. “I’ll fill you in later. But don’t worry! Everything is okay.”

“That’s good. Well then. Goodnight, everyone!” Juvia waved as she left the office.

“Goodnight!” The three waved.

“Cana,” Lucy reignited the debated now that Juvia was gone. “I don’t care if Natsu sleeps with other women, how can I when I have no problem sleeping with other men. We’re not a couple. But what does irritate me is that of all the bathhouses to choose, why mine??”

“It’s probably because of our services…” Levy threw in to diffuse the tension. “We do provide the best.”

“Yeah, I know,” Lucy sighed, “it just— it feels like he’s doing it on purpose.”

“You know I’m just teasing you, Lucy.” Cana retorted. “But I think you’re also reading too much into it. He’s a guy and history has shown a clueless one when it comes to women, so I doubt he’s masterminded going to the bathhouse as a way to irritate you.”

Lucy exhaled. “You guys are probably right. I guess I’m just still too wound up because of the party.”

“Maybe what you need to do is to unwind Lu,” Levy suggested.

Lucy sat back for a moment mulling over the idea. Yeah, maybe she should. It sure as hell wouldn’t hurt. Maybe let off some steam and stop thinking about Natsu, and a one-night fling could do just that. “You know what…” she turned to Cana with a new resolve. “What’s Loke’s number?”

Cana whipped out her phone. “Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about!”

[miyaniacs]

i already cried today, so i will thirst w/u instead 😡😤 can i pls get some hcs for my bois kuroo, akaashi, teru/oiks (you pick, luv) with their bsf/crush who’s never had their first kiss suddenly asking them to teach her? and yk it leads to them all tangled up in bed 😏 it just happened to me a month ago n’ now i gots me a bf 🥺 anyways, i hope you have an immaculate day, sending ya lots of luv, boo! xx

CAN YOU TEACH ME HOW TO KISS? 

There’s a Part 2 now !! 

okay so First of all : Congrats on getting yourself a man this way haha that's actually so cute !! ❤️🥺✊🏼 

warnings : some slight nsfw 

Oikawas is a bit longer and less nsfw buuut I just had to I'm sorry lol 

masterlist 

YAAA BOY KUROO is first: 

you walk up to him after his practice and straight up ask him. you told him all your friends are talking about kisses etc and you feel left out and also finally want this experience 

on the outside he's totally chill but inside tho. he's freaking out. 

he’ll be so confused but also proud??? like this was his fucking chance to make you his!! 

your at his, sitting on his bed, awkwardly starring at each other 

but he was a nervous wreck at the beginning 

but after you ensured him that you do want this his cocky self is backkkk 

his lips are millimetres away from your but he stops and looks you in the eyes to make sure AGAIN that this is what you want

yes he has a crush on you but that doesn't mean he’ll do anything you are not 100% sure of. 

after you nod he’ll softy kiss you, moving slowly so you’ll get used to it. His hand is softly grabbing your cheek stockig It while the other on is on is resting on your waist. 

yes he will tell you if you can do something better or tells you what he personally likes and he will show you how its done 

its like he’ll be presenting a whole powerpoint where he will SHOW you exactly how every single point is down - with every variation included 

after some time you'll get used to it and things start to heat up

he’ll be nibbling and softly biting on your lower lip making you moan

yes he did this on purpose because now his tongue is in your mouth and you're fighting for dominance. 

yes he wins lol 

but soon after, his lips are on your jaw, moving down to your neck, sucking and biting down on your skin, leaving marks for everyone to see. 

gathering your strength you flipped him over, sitting on top of him. 

he’s still smirking until his face drops and you can now only see pure love and lust in his eyes as you start to talke off your shirt 

originally you planned to leave marks on his neck too.. but his lips just magically force you to kiss them 

so your back again making out lol 

you start to tug on his shirt and he’ll gladly let you put it off of him 

now its your turn to stare bc this guy is ripped. you can't convince me otherwise 

you wanted to kiss his neck and down his abs but NOPE not today hny 

daddy mode is actived 

he flips you over again 

he’s living for it. seeing you lay under him, looking up through your lashes it drives him wild 

probably saying something like : “ nah babygirl, you wanted daddy me to teach you - so let me show you the real fun “

he’ll move down and kisses your neck again while his other hand is opening your bra / if you’re a guy or like me and takes every opportunity not to wear one, he’ll gets straight to work and starts messing with you even more 

uhm the rest is up for another HC lol 

you will end up sore af, with marks you won't be able to cover up, laying on his chest, his body wrapped around you, his hands stockig your back while he kisses your head. 

“you’re mine “ you mumble before falling asleep

OKAAY AKAASHI IS NEXT 

you probably start the conversation 

“hey Akashi, Bokuto told me you’re a good teacher, can you teach me how to kiss?”

he’ll blank stare at you and walk way lol 

so you'll run after him 

“akaaaashiiiiii please “ you whine the whole time 

after the 20th time he’ll stop and look at you 

The two of you are currently behind the gym

within seconds you're pinned up against the wall, his arms on each side of you, his face centimetres apart from yours 

“Y/N are you sure you want me to do this?” he ask in a low voice 

“ y- yes” you stutter taken back by his sudden change 

“Kitten I can teach you, but I need you to be absolutely sure if this is what you want”  because he is a respectful daddy ok?

after telling him again that you are sure of it he smirks 

“ let’s have some fun then” 

and his lips are pressed against yours 

he. is. so. soft.

he’ll be gentle af until he feels that your comfy 

then his dom! is starting to show

similar like Kuroo hell bite and suck on your lips 

trying his best to make you moan because that's what he always dreams off 

and now he hears you moaning his name and he goes crazy

he kisses your neck, sucking and leaving wet kisses 

your hands are wrapped around his neck pulling him closer 

he’ll probably lift you up so your legs are wrapped around his torso and he starts attacking your lips again 

as his tongue slips in your mouth you start to tense up. 

so he breaks the kiss and asks what's wrong

after you tell him that you have no idea how to frech kiss he’ll smile and say that that's what he's here for

hell guide you trough every step 

and yes he's a pro 

while catching your breath you ask him the one thing that's still in your mind 

“you got the keys to the clubroom right?” 

“thought you’d never ask” he smirks 

yes he taught you even more that day. and yes you continued this little arrangement  

for Study reasons. I mean. you wont become a pro with just one training session right?

okaYY last one I decided to do OIKAWA because this will be fun 

he’s your best friend and he has a big as crush on you ( vice versa ) 

and basically every girl has a crush on him 

and yes he went on dates ?? and had a few girlfriends ( not for too long tho) but you can say he's experienced right?

so on this Saturday night, you're having your normal movie night

and you kept on looking over at him not sure if you could ask him or if you were running your friendship 

but then the opportunity came. 

the couple in the movie started kissing. 

“ I wonder how this feels” you sigh 

“ feels what?” you looks at you confused 

“ Kissing “

“ohh you haven't kissed anyone yet y/n” he smiles 

“no,.., can you teach me how?” you blunt out 

“ Nawww finally taking advantage of me” he teases 

but rn he IS PANICKING

“yes. so please do me this favour tooruuuu” you whine 

“uhm.. okay I can do that” 

Sooo he moves closer 

and awkwardly places his hand on your face  

his face is moving even closer now 

you close your eyes ready to finally be kissed

but nothin happens? 

you open your eyes again 

and see sweat dripping down his forhead? 

“Tooru? are you okay?”

“ I - uhm - I - i just - I don't think this is right? I want you to do it with a person you have feelings for” he tries to save himself 

“that's why I asked you” you mumbled 

and he chocks on air 

“YOU WHAT”

“I like you trashy” you mumble und look up at him again “so please just kiss me” 

SOOOO NOW THERE’S NO BACK 

yes he is extreme happy to hear that, he likes you too. but there is one bis problem left. 

“Tooru? it’s not that you don’t know how to do it so just do it?” you joke. but you hit the nerve. 

THIS BOY IS AS INEXPERIENCED AS YOU 

“ um you see I like you too .. but ..,... I never ac-” 

“OMG WHAT?” 

“Dont make fun of me :( all the girls think I'm so great so I normally need to be good kisser - but I haver 0 experience so I never let others kiss me so no one would know about it and tell every one at school” he mumbles 

and you couldn't help it he was so cute???

you grabbed his face and kissed him 

after he overcame the shock he kissed you back and accidentally bit your lip lol 

but this made you moan and your moan switched something inside of him and he MAGICALLY knew what to do

so his kisses are soft, and still a bit awkward but he got better with every second 

so now he's kissing your neck, leaving marks while his hands grab your back and pull you down with him 

now his hands are on your ass and you’re making out again 

to get to the leaning part : you tell  each other what you like and what not 

because communication is KEY 

his hands are under your shirt, tongues fighting for dominance, you both knowing that you will not only be each others first kiss

but not today hny 

because his mother walks in his room 

dropped the cookies on the floor and slams the door shut 

yup mood is ruined  

you’re both tomatoes now and you will not come to his place anytime soon again

[cherry-toxic]

Fic writer questions!

I was tagged by @introvertia - thank you so much :) Your answers were really interesting!

How many works do you have on AO3?

Only 8

What's your total AO3 wordcount?

141754

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Four: Beyblade (gen fics mostly), Shizaya (Durarara), Grimmichi (Bleach), and Harringrove (Stranger Things).

I usually sit in a fandom for a quite a while before I actually start writing anything. I'm amazed by those people who can get stuck in right away (how do you do it!?!)

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. end the fight; before the fight ends you

2. Bound to Happen

3. Year of You

4. Broken Boys and Butterflies

5. So come take a drink (And drown your sorrows)

All Harringrove aside from 'Bound to Happen' - which I'm rather surprised came in second because the Grimmichi fandom is waaaaay smaller than the Harringrove fandom.

'end the fight...' is also the only wip here. The rest are completed one-shots.

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Yes and no. It depends. I want to respond because comments really do mean a lot to me and I love rambling with people, but I have issues with online communication. Like, sometimes I write out a response and when I read it back to myself my brain just goes 'no that's terrible you sound like an idiot delete it now' and then I go 'yessir you're completely right how silly of me.'

When it comes to wips, I tend to reply to every comment when I'm getting ready to post the next chapter, that way it's like a little heads-up - new stuff incoming soon!

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Y'know as much as I love angst I actually prefer to have my fics end on a relatively positive note (angst with a happy ending is my shit).

But I suppose 'So come take a drink (And drown your sorrows)' is overall pretty angsty and I left the ending open so if I ever felt like continuing it I could do so easily.

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you've ever written?

Big nah. Kind of like AU fics, they just don't interest me that much.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yes, but it came from someone who was just making the rounds on a bunch of Harringrove fics and they were highly suspected to be an anti so it didn't really bother me that much because I knew they were trolling.

I've had a few like, vague comments/back-handed compliments that got under my skin a bit though.

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Yes, occasionally I do. Generally I'd say I'm pretty vanilla, but I am currently writing an a/b/o fic, though I think it might go under non-traditional a/b/o because, again, vanilla lol

My smut usually comes with a lot of introspection, like they'll be doing the deed and one of them will be internally streaming a 5000+ word monologue (I do this with Grimmjow sometimes because he's a big virgin who views sex as silly human nonsense).

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Parts of a fic, yes. I came across this fic that was clearly plagiarizing from several different authors (they forgot to change the characters names and everything) and I found entire paragraphs that were copy/pasted straight from one of my fics.

The thing is, this was over 10 years ago, something I wrote when I was... seventeen, maybe? So... I don't get why they copied it because it was pretty bad to be honest...

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, an old one called '10 Miles in Your Shoes' (beyblade) although it was never completed because well, firstly, I never completed the original, and secondly, when the translator asked me how long I was planning on it being I said around 20-30k and uhhh... lets just say I overshot that by a mile!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. While I think it would be interesting to try I honestly don't know if I could give up control like that!

What’s your all time favorite ship?

Hard to say because I tend to go for characters over ships. Like, I got into Grimmichi because of Grimmjow and Harringrove because of Billy.

But since Grimmjow is my all-time favourite character then, I guess Grimmichi, but Harringrove is definitely a close second because the fandom has spoiled me rotten with all their amazing fics (in terms of reading material, Harringrove is my fav).

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

'10 Miles in Your Shoes' - the bodyswap fic.

It's been a long time since I engaged with anything related to beyblade but I have a lot of fondness for this fic because it was the second I ever started writing and it was the fic that allowed me to truly grow as a writer. There's a huge improvement from the first to the most recent chapter (most recent being 5 years ago...) to the point where it looks like it could have been written by two different people, and I received so much positive feedback and encouragement throughout those years. I wish I had it in me to go back and finish it off but I struggle enough while writing for my current obsessions so it's looking more and more unlikely...

At the very least, I think I might transfer it to AO3 since ff.net seems to be slowly going under. Even if I never complete it, I don't want it lost forever.

What are your writing strengths?

This might sound ridiculous but I don't know? I always feel like I'm winging everything!!

I guess. One thing I've been complimented on a lot is my ability to portray messy (for lack of a better word) situations in a realistic way. I've been asked a few times if I've ever studied psychology and -

Nope

Just winging it!

What are your writing weakness?

EDITING!!!

I really should get a beta because I miss so many stupid little mistakes, like - okay - I always used to write in past tense, it was never something I even thought about, past tense was just the default. And then suddenly, around 2017/18, I began transitioning to present tense completely unconsciously and now every time I re-read 'Bound to Happen' I get angry because I bounced between tenses all the way through that fic and I didn't even notice until a year after I posted it.

Also. Incredibly slow. Lack of consistency. Perfectionist until I get stuck and then I feel like you can spot exactly where I lost momentum. Utterly hopeless when it comes to descriptions of setting/scenery. I don't think I'm very good at building atmosphere either. Dialogue, although I am improving at that.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I can't say I really have any thoughts on this? I don't do it much myself.

What was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

Beeeeyblaaade! I was fifteen when I wrote my very first fic (now deleted because it was awful!)

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Oh god, this is hard!

If we're talking completed fics only, then probably 'Year of You'. That was my I-Do-Not-Accept-Billy's-Death fic but I WILL take all of the angst material from S3 and ride it hard.

If we're including wips, then both 'end the fight...' and 'metamorphosis' are probably my favourites right now.

'End the fight...' is my BIG Billy redemption fic which I started plotting out not long after S2 and there's so many scenes I'm looking forward to writing (yeah I know its been a while since i last updated but the past year has been rough okay)

'Metamorphosis' is the a/b/o fic which I was kind of nervous about at first because its not a trope that i read a lot of but i'm enjoying how its turning out so far!

Whew! That was a lot!

I'm tagging: firstly, whoever wants to do it because I like reading about peoples writing experiences (make sure to tag me!) And then: @shadowthorne @bentnotbroken1fanfiction @callieb @backwardshirt @memes-saved-me @murderlight @magniloquent-raven @aeon-of-neon @louhetar