#( knowing our health care system it might take the whole year )

[piritos03]

Got an email that my hourly wage has been raised by 7 whole ass percent LMAO

The average food inflation last year was around 40-50%. Proof:

[softsky-daily]

7/17/2024

It was an inside kinda day.

Positive thing: I got a lot of sleep.

I ended up not getting much done just because I was exhausted, and also stressed thinking about internship tomorrow. Going to bed and waking up early and being there all day is just the worst. I'm hoping it won't be so bad this week since our supervisor said she'd take us on field trips to different internship sites, but she might still be sick, and either way she's canceled on stuff before.

I really need to get ahold of her so I can tell her I'm quitting early. Going there the past few months has just been draining away my willpower like a huge motivation vacuum.

Man. I thought I'd be over working at places that make me feel shitty ever since I quit my last job, but it had to be baked right into my program (which, for the record, has also been making me feel shitty). I was talking to a classmate friend a bit and she said she could see her future so clearly once she graduated, becoming a private practice counselor straight out the gate. I think that made me realize I am just in a whole other universe compared to that. My mind is focused on being anywhere else, doing anything else. It almost breaks my heart because this is what I wanted to do since I was little, and certainly I think I'd be a very good counselor.

But not here. And not like this. I need a serious break regardless, and it is just not being given to me. I can take a lot but I'm at my limit and it's terrible that the overarching message in this field I keep hearing is that we don't rest. Whatever self care we tout, we don't actually follow through with that. We have to push through because our clients need us and nobody else can do it.

And I think it is true to some extent. Our system just doesn't allow for better, accessible mental health services, and it falls to those willing to sacrifice a lot to be able to help. Another classmate friend told me he's seen so many counselors who have just lost their humanity over the years trying to stay and help at these places. I know what he means. Especially at internship - the softness and gentleness is just not in them anymore, even the ones who stay generally kind. I can understand why. It's a tough job. Even I can feel some of my gentleness leaving and I hate that more than anything.

I remember feeling frustrated because people have said "this career just might not be for you." And if it isn't? What would you have me do? I still need to finish my degree. The feeling of being trapped is so palpable I could almost reach out and shake the bars of my cage for real.

Anyway, tomorrow I'll just get myself through internship, and then the next day the same thing, and then I can sleep in on the weekend. On Sunday I'm volunteering at a dinner for Japanese students visiting from Takasaki High School (which I believe is in Gunma Prefecture). I'm excited for that. And hopefully somewhere in between I'll be able to flag down my internship supervisor and tell her I'm quitting early.

[trans-axolotl]

hi, I really like your blog and your antipsych thoughts have been very helpful to me. i hope this is ok to ask for advice (sorry i have brain fog and this question is vague)? i think i'm looking for 'unconventional' advice or suggestions, the kind that someone in the psych system would not necessarily recommend to me.

i have had a bad history with therapy, but i very much need some kind of mental support that i am not getting otherwise in my life (issues like CPTSD, DID, among other things). im in a position where i /can/ go to therapy, and i've been with a therapist that specializes in the things that are causing me the most problems for a year and theyre fine (i.e. has not ever helped me figure out anything about how to improve my life but has been someone who can perscribe me stuff, and hasn't done anything actively harmful to me like other therapists and psychiatrists have), but going is so upsetting for some reason (maybe because the therapy environment has been so bad in the past?) and not at all helpful. it's useful for me to have a relationship to a psychiatrist/therapist for medication and other 'navigating the system' reasons, but it's absolutely unhelpful. i am very frustrated and disillusioned with the whole concept of 'therapy' in general (maybe due to my history)!! but i don't know how else to get help!

it's harder because of the brain fog. i also feel very isolated partially because i'm in a not great environment, and partially because i have multiple mental illnesses in addition to not being a very nice person. i have felt really let down by supposed friends i've come to for help who just said therapy speak stuff like 'you should get help....' and 'sorry i don't have the emotional bandwidth to help <3' and stuff like that. it really makes me feel like i'm too messed up to be able to ask for help from regular people and i have to go to the psych industry but of course i've already been failed by them too :(

hey anon!

I think what you've said makes so much sense. I feel like we're so often told "go get help" but when we do try to seek support, it isn't as simple as just going and easily finding a therapist who is able to provide all the support and care we need. It can be so hard to find and pay for therapy in the first place, harder still to find someone who specializes in a therapy style to meet our needs, and sometimes we might not just be in a place in our life where we are in an environment that allows us to do in depth therapy work. And I just want to say that it isn't your fault if therapy isn't meeting your needs right now--that doesn't mean that you're failing at therapy. You absolutely aren't alone in feeling dissatisfied with therapy and wanting other options.

For me, what's helped when I've been considering making changes about how I approach my mental health has first been sitting down and really taking a thorough look at what things are working and what things aren't working. It seems like you've done a lot of that already--you know that it's helpful to have a therapeutic relationship to get meds and for help in the system, you know that the therapy environment hasn't been particuarly helpful for other types of healing work, and it seems like another thing you're thinking about is how to get mental support from your friends and other people in your everyday life. I think those are really good starting places to consider where you want to go from here. It might be helpful to make a list of what feels like priorities to focus on right now--do you want to develop more skills for navigating crisis? Do you want to focus on changing your relationship with dissociation? harm reduction for self destructive behaviors? building resilience and cultivating relationships in your life? There's no right or wrong answers here--you're going to be the expert on what feels most important right now.

I also just want to say that I think it's really shitty when we're made to feel like we're too crazy or too needy or too messed up to be able to be cared for and supported in our community. I've definitely had people tell me that, and it really hurts and makes me feel hopeless, like I'm always going to be struggling and that there's no chance that I'll be able to get better. But fuck that. We deserve to have meaningful connections in our community, access to resources that help us, and to be able to build resilient relationships where getting emotional support isn't considered an unmanageable burden, even if we're mad/mentally ill/ neurodivergent. I'm sorry that you haven't been able to rely on your friends and community that way, although I know it's hard when everyone we know is struggling and people don't have the energy or skills or knowledge to be able to help each other.

This is getting long, so I'm just going to list off a ton of random tips and suggestions, and I hope some of them might resonate with you.

Join a peer support group aligned with antipsych values. Hearing Voices Network, Alternatives to Suicide with the Wildflower alliance, Multiplied by One, FEDUP trans/intersex eating disorder support groups are all great options.

harm reduction! this can be especially applicable for self-destructive behaviors, but just in general moving outside of an "abstinence-only model." working to understand your actions on a spectrum of totally chaotic, unmanaged behaviors to more managed, intentional relationships with those behaviors. embracing any positive change as an important step instead of self-blame and all-or-nothing thinking.

Trying to think of the best way to describe what I'm thinking here, so I might not have the best phrasing. But basically, spending time separating your ideas for what wellbeing and quality of life look like for you from the psychiatric system's ideas of what a "normal," "healthly," quality of life looks like. For me, this looked like realizing that I wasn't actually interested in getting rid of all my hallucinations, but instead I just wanted to lessen the distress I experienced and find a way to hallucinate without panicking. So I guess just in general--really exploring what is actually important to you for your wellbeing and not limiting yourself to mainstream definitions of "recovery."

Unconventional coping skills, or coping skills that traditional psychiatry deems "risky." I've talked with some people who things like getting tattoos and piercings are actually incredibly healing for them, and are an important part of their "therapeutic" journey. Not going to go into detail or promote other "risky" coping skills on Tumblr lmao, but more just say that it's okay if there's things that therapists view as risky that you might have another perspective on how it fits into your personal healing.

Building up your and your loved ones capacity for community care. This can be a really hard one, because I know it always frustrated me when I would see people talking online about how great things like care webs or the power of peer support when I just didn't have any of that in my physical everyday life. So I'm not just going to put this here like it's a magical solution or something that's easy to accomplish. It's something that can take a ton of work and we're allowed to be frustrated about that. I think one strategy that helped me with this was spending a lot of time building my own understanding of my own capacity to help, my own needs, and what ways I would like to be cared for. That helped me start small, just by having conversations with my loved ones when I wasn't in crisis and saying "Hey, this is how I would like things to go when I'm in crisis. This is something that helps me when I'm hallucinating. This is a way you could let me know that you can't support me tonight but still leaves room for us to have connection. This is how I can help you. Let's talk openly together and develop and practice how we want to care for each other." Starting with just one person and one conversation really went a long way for me in terms of eventually building up an actual support network and for me was super instrumental in healing work.

Setting out an hour a week that's my "self therapizing time." just using one hour a week to look up new resources, try out new skills, journal, do self-inquiry, participate in activism, do something that brings me joy, read something new about mental health, literally anything that feels intentional in that hour. trying out a lot of new things and quitting a lot of new things!

Incorporating your physical needs. I'm sure we've heard a million times things like "get sleep, nourish yourself, go outside," and all that is great but often feels fucking impossible when we're mentally doing not great. but I guess just saying it can be good to be aware of how our physical body impacts our mental health in other ways. things like trying to get our sensory needs met, embracing movement that feels good + making space for rest, embracing things that bring our physical body pleasure whether that's tasty food, sex or other kinds of physical intimacy with other people, if it's using substances in a way that feels helpful or joyful or fun--anything really!

Here's a bunch of random orgs and resources that I have found helpful: Fireweed Collective, Wildflower Alliance, Project LETS, Mapping our Madness, Mad Survival Tools, Organizing Guide for Psychiatric Survivors, MindFreedom Resources, Multiplied by one (I can't personally vouch because I haven't been to their groups, but I have a friend with DID who attends these groups and had positive things to say about them.)

I'd also add on this book: "Psychosis, Dissociation, and Trauma: Evolving perspectives on Severe Psychopathology" although I do want to give a warning that this book is a heavy academic text that has a lot of clinical and stigmatizing language. For me, it had some helpful information that helped me make connections between my experiences of trauma, dissociation, and psychosis, but I would not recommend reading it unless you feel like you're in the right headspace and can deal with wading through a lot of the psychiatric narrative.

These are all just some things that sometimes work for me, so please feel free to disregard anything that doesn't resonate with you. I'd also love it if followers could add on with any tips, resources, any "unconventional" advice!

thanks for reaching out, anon, and I hope you have a good night 💜

[cowboyjen68]

Hi Jen!! I’ve recently realized that I have an extreme fear of intimacy and am very emotionally unstable. This realization is making a lot of things about me and my life make sense, but I’m not really sure about how to move forward and get better? I want to be able to have relationships in the future but It’s something I truly can’t imagine is possible for me if I don’t try to get better. Do you have any advice for this?

p.s. I just want to say that I really appreciate you doing what you do. I can’t imagine how taxing it can be to constantly console people all the time, thank you for being someone we can turn to.

I am going to respond to the last part first. (the PS)  Thanks for letting me know my blog helps in some way to create a place where you feel like you can reach out. Don’t worry about me. I am pretty good at balancing life with online life and taking breaks when I need to rest my heart and brain. I have lots of support to talk through things and hash out my ideas and feelings. My crunchy granola hippy (said with affection) calls me an Extraverted  Empath and told me my Dad was the same way. Basically, I don’t get exhausted from consoling or supporting those in distress like others, instead I thrive on it. 

A first step in getting your mental health in balance is to recognize you might have some struggles. The second step it so get an official diagnosis or evaluation. Do not rely on google or the internet or even friends/family to tell you what the issues are that you are dealing with. Seek some professional help. IF you have insurance or live in a state where therapy is affordable please seek out a good fit. Do not be afraid to “interview” possible candidates and ask for what you want. IF you want a female who is between 40 and 60, you have the right to ask for that. If you prefer a different demographic advocate for who it is you think will best suit your needs.

If you begin therapy and it is not a good fit, any decent doctor will be happy to give you a referral to someone else. Good therapists recognize they might not be everyone’s cup of tea. Once you get a therapist she can help you get an evaluation through referrals to a larger hospital or mental health facility. It is highly possible there is no “firm” or specific diagnosis. But narrowing down your struggles can be very helpful to you and to your counselor. 

If you cannot afford therapy, inquire at a local University or non profit medical center (hospital) to see if they offer free help for those who can’t pay. Contact your state's social services and ask for help. Social workers know their way around the medical system. Most hospitals have social workers who can help with paperwork etc. It is their job.

There are, of course, some self help videos, youtube channels, books and other resources that you can research. My rule of thumb is the more simple the better and anything you can do to help gain tools to tackle one symptom at a time is good. For instance, if you are really struggling with holding a job, look into that one specific thing. If you have social anxiety and feel like it is holding you back from friendships, work on that. You might not be able to do enough self help to treat the WHOLE you but you can do little things to ease the symptoms of the greater illness. 

Check into Holistic Chiropractic care. I know, I know. Crunch Granola. But getting adjusted, having your physical body feel better can be a real thing. It can truly help you get into a better mental state when your body is better. Often, and this is a proven fact, our bodies react to our mental distress so then we end up struggling with mental AND physical discomfort.  However, Chiropractors are not for everyone. Mine has helped me greatly for almost 20 years. You can get a massage, do yoga, work on your posture or get a decent pair of shoes and go for some walks. Anything you can do to help your body recover from any mental trauma or pain is helpful in your overall attempt to feel better. 

Keep in mind. You do not have to be “fixed” or in some perfect mental state of calm and collected to be deserving of a relationship.  You must be aware of how your mental health affects others and how your actions/reactions can manifest. You can learn tools to form more appropriate responses to stress or triggers. Most mental illnesses are not really going to be “cured” but instead we must understand that others should not necessarily have to learn to work around our issues but we can learn skills so we can live in the world with greater comfort and ease. 

I hope this helps a bit. I would include links but everything is so regionally/state/country based when it comes to mental illness. If you search articles to get information check scientifically published journals over “opinion” pieces and check sources for opinion pieces for validity. If looking into government services make sure the website is .gov otherwise there are a ton of bad sites who offer to help for a “fee” but you get the same help for free at government sites.   You don’t need a middleman to obtain social or university or non profit help. 

[multiplicity-positivity]

i don't know if you guys are going to be able to help us but I don't know who to turn to,

Just for context, I am part of a newly discovered system, we have known that there are multiple people around it's been a couple of years but it was just recently that it was suggested that this might be caused by a disorder, but this is something that only a couple of other alters know about; our host knows about us and has interacted with us before but he is in deep denial over it.

Anyway, recently I have been trying to organize things and manage our inner world but we are having quite a few problems with communication and acceptance over this condition and it's starting to leak into the host's everyday life; (like for example we aways suffered from headaches due to switching but it's been getting more frequent and it makes our host (or anyone for that matter) to be completely unable to function properly, which leads to other health related problems); I know I should seek a therapist or a doctor to talk about this but medical care at the moment is pretty much impossible because of monetary and trauma related reasons so I am not sure how I should go about this; I just want to take care of my system and our host but it is just getting a little too much and I am lost I don't know what to do.

I am here looking for some advice from people that understand system related issues like this but it's completely okay if you guys can't help us, and my apologies in case you already answered any other ask like this.

Thank you.

Hi! So we know you said you couldn’t seek therapy or medical help, but we’d like to pass along something that often gets repeated for us in therapy.

We’ve been doing trauma work over the past 8 months or so. It is grueling, exhausting, and depressing work. We regularly get overwhelmed and reach a point where we’re not able to function. When it gets to this point, we don’t talk about trauma in therapy until we’re feeling better. It’s all about prioritizing our health and well-being, and that can’t happen if we’re always pushing ourselves in therapy and in our everyday lives without taking breaks to check in and relax.

Even if y’all aren’t doing trauma work, something very similar may be happening. You might be trying to take on too much at once, causing your system to suffer as a result. If learning about and trying to manage your system is making it difficult for you to function, you very well may need to pump the brakes for a while. Spend some time not focusing on your system. Learn a new hobby, watch a show or play a video game, and let your system’s inner workings sit unconsidered for some time. After your system has had a chance to calm down, and you’re not stressing out over your plurality as much, it may be safe to continue your efforts. But pushing yourself and your system too hard too fast can absolutely cause your system to get burnt out and have more difficulties recovering than normal.

So definitely our best advice for y’all would be to take things slow! Don’t push yourself too hard, and if it’s getting difficult to function, pause your efforts of in-system work until your system is feeling better. Do something you enjoy for a while and try to relax. Your system isn’t going anywhere - it’s okay to take your time figuring this out. And going slowly/taking your time with this will have huge benefits for your whole system. There’s no rush to get everything sorted and figured out ASAP. In fact, rushing like this can be detrimental (and it sounds like it’s had some negative effects on your system!).

For your host in denial, we have a post specifically for dealing with denial - maybe it could help put his mind at ease and take the pressure off the rest of you a little bit:

We’re wishing you the best of luck with this! We really aren’t a good stand in for therapy or medical treatment, though we understand you may be nervous to seek treatment if you’ve been traumatized in the past, or entirely unable to afford it. We hope that soon you can get the help you need for your system - there are gentle, trauma-informed therapists out there who could handle your system’s situation with kindness and grace! Until you’re able to access something like that, though, we’re wishing you peace, comfort, and plenty of rest! Good luck with everything, and remember to stay hydrated and take plenty of breaks!

🌸 Margo and 💫 Parker

[dieabadass]

//having diabetes can’t be that bad they say ////

Let me tell you why the statement above is a load of crap.

1. Our bodies are waging war against themselves.

2. It takes us longer to heal when we get hurt and it takes us longer to recover from illnesses because our immune system is jacked.

3. We could die at any moment without warning.

4. Low blood sugars feel like you’re going through drug withdrawals.

5. High blood sugars feel like your body is drying out like a raisin.

6. Afraid of needles? Well tough! We need to prick our fingers more than three times a day, and either pierce yourself every three days for a pump site change or take more than four injections everyday.

7. Our organs are slowly failing.

8. We have a high chance of going blind.

9. We could lose our feet and legs

10. Insulin is crazy expensive.

11. Testing strips are crazy expensive.

12. The constant highs and lows drain us.

13. We can’t just eat food right away. We need need to calculate how many grams of carbohydrates are in our food, test our blood sugar, configure in a correction if need be, dose and by the time we take our first bite; everyone else have already finished.

14. Doctors are super expensive.

15. Pumps, meters and continuous glucose monitors (CGMs) are really really expensive.

16. No one ever takes our illness seriously.

17. Having children is VERY risky for ladies with diabetes.

18. The constant fear we have when we go to sleep knowing that we might not ever wake up due to low blood sugars at night.

19. The bruises and scars all over our body from YEARS of injections, site changes and finger pricks.

20. How our feet and hands are always freezing due to our poor circulation.

So tell me again how my suffering “isn’t that bad”. Make another joke about the worst thing that has probably ever happened to us. Laugh again when you say, “All of this food is going to give me di-ah-beet-us.” So just think about that next time you want to say something about diabetes….and the list goes on and on and on…

A year and some change ago me & my husband separated…. I was dealing with a lot of health issues and mental health issues & years and years of drug addiction wich also did not help with the invisible disease that wrecked havoc on my body since I was 5 years old ( I’m now 31 ) I didn’t even realize that my body was failing me from years of uncontrolled diabetes. I take responsibility for that 100%. What I hate myself for even to this day… is how differently I could have done things. I guess in the end no matter how well you take care of yourself the chances of living to grow old with someone sometimes isn’t in the cards for some of us. I hate that part. ….what I even hate more is the person I was supposed to spend whatever time I have left here left me for someone else. Someone who was healthier and able to keep up with him and his life…what I hate even more than that was that the person he left me for took disgusting cruel pleasure in making sure I knew everyday how sick I was and how she couldn’t wait to get the phone call from my crazy over protective mother with the news that I finally went to sleep and never woke up…while I was fighting for my life literally she had the nerve to let me know that she and my husband of 13 years could finally start their new life together without me and the burden I was to him would be over for good…. I still have the text message she sent me that almost sent me to my grave. Not from the illness i didn’t choose to have but from the words of someone who didn’t even know me. Turns out she actually knew me before she even met my husband but that’s a whole nother crazy story and crazy fucking rabbit hole/paradoxxx I’ll get into another time…. But this girls words and the combination of my husband allowing this cruel person to treat me like that and actually believed her twisted heinous immature nature and insensitiveness to the fact that she could have not crawled into my world at a more horrible time was sitting their laughing and mocking me for something I couldn’t help and had to now endure alone….a part of me will always hate this person for that. But the better part of me also forgives that girl and even my husband because I now have them too thank for overcoming the most trying times of my life… I’m far from perfect I’m far from healthy or sane or just. But I am far better than I used to be and something like having a chronic illness like type 1 diabetes is just another thing in this lifetime of mine. And for whatever it’s worth I’m thankful that my disease has showed me that despite all the obstacles…despite all the wreckage and chaos it’s caused for my life…. I’m still here above ground breathing for another day…

[archive-of-the-incident]

PLEASE CHECK AFTER THIS POST FOR THE POLL WE PUT UP TO SEE WHO’D BE INTERESTED IN WHAT :) We did one and a couple were interested in cheap adopts but that was months ago. Check out the sample arts attached, too which will be posted after this! All of these higher prices might change, too. I also don’t wanna hear any bullshit off “profiting off this situation”. And I didn’t even do anything. But you mfs have proved you’re absolutely insane and will make up anything. I had plans a long fucking time ago, I’m not “profiting” off of anything, you bitches interrupted me and my headmates. Check my tumblr from the beginning.

❌:Me and my headmates will be back to our usual activity, including the plans of cheap, or pretty affordable commissions AND adopts that were mentioned a while back. We just need to finish an art trade and a birthday card and we’ll hop to it.. I am so sorry to Ramona who got her beautiful adopts overshadowed by this bullshit.

Some of our upcoming plans and info

(Note: Customs will always cost more.)

The cheap adopts info-

(Will range from 3 USD to 25-30, it depends. We’re basically going to make a whole price range, less complex adopts on base or not in chibi forms for 3-5 USD at least and the highest I’d ever think we’d go is 30-40 for special events. You have an option to pay for those for much less OR wait for a sale where you could get more content for that price, it’s all gonna depend how we feel. 30-40 would be for complicated hand drawn refs and an added headshot etc. Or, one for 20-25 on base with added on art.

It’s all gonna depend on how well our sales are received. So don’t take any of those higher prices as solidified. All we know for sure right now is that there’ll typically be a lot of 3-5 USD ones along with 10-12 USD. They usually will be that cheap. Our goal is to provide lower prices and discounts out of our own kindness, and because we are in a place where we are financially comfortable and well taken care of, and we just want to give back for that privilege out of our own want, while still making a couple dollars on the side for our system so they can buy things for themselves. And also to get Fawn things as gifts for her hard work in school, and fuel her special interests of course. She has had jobs in physical establishments but they have taken such a toll on her physical health (asthma attacks and more) AND mental health, and she deserves to rest and be able to do art at home or have her alters do it. We’ll actually be living some time in Colombia each year where she’ll be hella pampered like she deserves. So yes, we just want to do a nice thing and also making these specific adopts accessible (you’ll see some of the ideas in a minute :) ) because of how much fandoms or any kinds of special interests/hyperfixations can mean to people, and we wanna give a discount on that.

-Most of our adopt ideas is making feral/furry adopts of who we’re based on and other characters from DFTM OR references (such as mark’s adopts hes planning based off of the movies hes canonically reviewed,) (if anyone is interested,) and again if anyone is interested there will be other fandoms, for those who are also fictives, fictkin of them, or have them as comfort characters.

But that won’t be all we make. We’ll make a variety of things.

Note: Some freebies will be released occasionally. None of our adopts have a schedule.

(VERY GENERAL LIST)

-Warrior cat/other fandom/non fandom oc adopts (Will range from 3 USD to 25-30 USD, it depends. We’re basically going to make a whole price range, less complex adopts on base or not in chibi forms for 3-5 USD at least,

Elaborations: Character based of of “fursonas/feralsonas” being higher priced and with more art, along with characters who are separate of them. but still themed around them at around 25-30 USD maybe? Depends. It would involve chibis, back and front view etc the whole thing.

General common hyperfixation/special interest adopts for very cheap, like for example bug themed adopts, dinosaur themed adopts, etc etc. (You are actually free to request them down below of what you’d like to be done, and it can be reserved for you! This would be cheaper than what we price regular customs at IF you choose artistic liberty or a premade.)

Choose your hyperfixation/special interest, species etc, fully customizable: 20 USD (Off base ref)

Choose your hyperfixation/special interest mystery adopt: 10 USD (Off base ref)

MLP oc adopts- 5-10 USD (Off base)

Farm animal themed adopts - 4-15 USD, maybe 20

HMF furry/feral experiment based adopts- probably 20-25 due to complexity.

Series of adopts that are themed around certain events or references-

Adopts centered around Mark’s movie reviews, like bat furry adopts or knight themed adopts etc. (Mentioned earlier)

Movie themed adopts in general

But they’ll be just as original to where it’s just a fun nod.

And more! Keep in mind we sell and create a variety of things. It won’t just be adopts or just DFTM etc, if you read me trying navigate our next plans to the end, thank you! Polls will be coming in with art example. Check this thread where we try to keep all the info together.

[bad-advice-its-very-bad]

tw general mentions of mental health

so i have this friend. let's call them emily. i've known emily for two years now, and they've grown to be one of my closest friends. mostly because we both really struggle with mental health stuff and at that point in my life no one else knew about those struggles. we helped each other through a lot of really crappy stuff and times. the difference is, in those two years, i've gone to, and am still in therapy, and have learned coping skills, have a support system etc etc etc ive tried convincing emily (on numerous occasions) to do the same, but they consistently refuse to do so, and they still pretty much only have me. there's also a ton of other stuff, but i could write a ten page essay about that. pretty much, our friendship, even though it's great feels kind of one-sided where im reaching out and they take weeks or months to respond (if they do at all) and dont really talk to me when we see each other in person and it's just getting really draining emotionally. so a few days ago, i finally make the decision to, well, not cut them off but pretty much tell them i'd had enough and im going to take a break for a while. they responded and pretty much just went straight to the self-deprecation (pretty much im sorry im so worthless and can't even maintain a friendship). and while im just so relieved that i've cut them off, more or less, to some degree, im just so worried since im all they have and if im gone who knows what will happen. so what should i do?

sorry for the long message

hum, that’s a tricky one.

First things first, I’d shove a WHOLE lotta resources on mental health in their messages. I know it may seem like your annoying them, but if it’s that bad they deserve to know there’s helplines and chats and groups that they can turn to. (I suggest vet them before you send them)

Secondly, sometimes it’s hard for people to realize they are allowed to reach out for help. Even if they only think it’s minor or it will take valuable space for others that “ are worst than them” But they have every right to reach out for help, their allowed to go to people with minor issues or major issues. And if you can somehow get that through their head you’ll probably see some improvement.

thirdly, I don’t think they can access traditional in person therapy as it seems. You can never know why, personally for me it’s a whole BIG awful talk about my mental health that I never want to tell my family. And it might be a similar situation with your friend, so unorthodox ways to get that same therapy experience might benefit them alot.

fourthly, you can’t help everyone. Sometimes it’s on them to figure out how to cope and understand how to get better, and even though you love them and care deeply it’s hard to get them to understand that. If you’re worried your friend might be engaging in risky behaviors (S/H, alcoholism, drugs, suicidal behavior, taking too many risks for no apparent reason.)

I suggest trying to talk to them about harm reduction.

fifthly, you being emotionally drained and exhausted by being their therapist friend is totally valid. your friend saying self deprecating things is just a symptom of a bigger problem they have, it's not your fault or anything you need a break from them. if they were in the same situation they would do the same thing, it's hard to manage both your mental health and your friends. I don't blame you for being exhausted, the reason I do this stuff is because I'm exhausted by my own problems and this is a healthy and constructive way to help both you and me. your helping your friend out of love, but also obligation.

I think a good plan to do is.

give your friend a pep talk and show them tons of alternate ways to access therapy that is not in person.

give them helpline information and tell the "I've known you for so long, I'd never try to hurt you. I just want you to know there's options if life gets hard and I'm not around

tell them about harm reduction, and CURB any and all negative connotations about addiction and self harm. if they are suffering the best thing you can do is be accepting and show them ways to safely and also reduce the harm of the addictions/self harm.

tell them if they are being abused. in anyway period, they can trust you to not victim blame or something without knowing the full story. we don't know what's happening with them, but we have to be kind and caring if that's the reason for her mental health. tell them "it was never your fault, you didn't know." or "you were just a kid, it was never you that was the problem but how you were treated. it's okay to be upset or angry, or grieve the life you should have had. that's normal. trust me I'm here for you."

also if the whole abuse thing is a yes, give them tons of abuse helplines. you and I don't know how to go forward with that knowledge but the helplines know how to.

support them and tell them truely why you feel drained (if you Hadn't already.) and tell them you actually care alot about them and this is not an attack or that your mad at them or anything. your overwhelmed too, and you both should feel not overwhelmed. (VERY IMPORTANT, YOU HAVE TO SAY YOUR NOT ANGRY OR ANYTHING. mentally ill people tend to think the worst if you don't say it. be kind and caring, and they should not feel so bad.)

if that doesn't work, I think you yourself should call a helpline and ask about strategies to help your friend. they should know a lot more than both you and me.

thank you for sending an ask in, this has been interesting!

I hope you can figure out a way to help your friend.

if worst comes to worse, I suggest you give your friend character.ai's psychologist's link to your friend. it's better than nothing, and it's surprisingly helped me too. so it might help your friend open up.

here's the link LINK

I hope I was able to provide a push in the right direction, remember this is the BAD advice blog. not everything will work, sometimes we both have to fail a bit to figure out the best way to help people.

[daz4i]

Hey, i just read a vent you posted a while ago, please dont read the rest if it might affect you negatively.

I just wanna say, i have a friend who has depression. She talks to me alot, and the stuff we talk about revolve around the same topic like you've mentioned. I never, ever found her boring, nor have i ever wanted to stop talking to her enrirely. I dont think id ever get tired of our conversations. Sure, everyone has their own mental health to take care of, and i know when to ask her for a bit of time for myself, since i know i wont be of much help to anyone if im not stable myself. And im confident that it works for us both. She has a support system that's got her back when i can't be there for her, and when i can, I'll lend an ear. always.

What im saying is, there's nothing wrong with talking to your friends or anyone close to you about what you're dealing with or going through. They love you, and they want to be there for you, just like how i want to be there for my friend. And ill never ever want her to feel like she couldnt talk to me about anything she's going through, even if its the same thing, even if its over and over again for 5 years, and for however long in the future. Just like how your friends and close ones would want you to talk to them.

we're human, and we all need our support. So please, if you can, never feel guilty about sharing or talking about anything you're going through with the people you love and who love you. Some people would make you feel otherwise, but you have to be strong and know that there's nothing wrong with something so guiltless about sharing your weight, no matter what kind of weight it may be.

Im sorry if this was too much to read and i know this wont make things okay. i just wanted to let you know this. stay safe and take care, okay?

ah i appreciate the input, thank you!!

i agree with what you're saying but at the same time i think my issue comes from like. not feeling I'm allowed to complain when I'm not taking any steps to change things

ik my friends love me but also i feel like i make at least some of them mad when i talk abt my problems bc it's like "if you're suffering so much why aren't you doing anything about it"

so. ig this is another layer to the whole thing. the guilt stems more from complaining abt smth i might possibly one day be able to change (tho i highly doubt it, given my life experience so far, which is why i stopped trying) than just venting abt my feelings. i think. but then turning it into something beautiful can ease the guilt at least bc it gives it some other excuse to exist, if that makes sense

[fantrolloftheday]

GREETINGS AND SALUTATIONS TUMBLR

I (@nnugatoryextravagance) used to run a twitter account under the same name as this blog, but now I refuse to use that horrific bird app for the sake of my health, BUT also really missed doing this, So now here we are

There is technically speaking only one blog admin (Me, Sludge!) but I am the host of a multiple system, so others might post as well (we will use emojis to identify ourselves, mine is 💊) ((please be respectful, we will not engage with syscourse so dont bother))

[Also I know the name implies this is daily, but honestly dont hold your breath on that.]

ANYWAY YEAH onto the rules and other stuff

(keep reading)

Prepare necessary info about your Fantroll (Minimum info is at least Name, one SAFE FOR WORK photo, gender and/or pronouns [either one or both], caste, and sign)

Optional info is Age, Classpect, Lusus, Sign (if its not from the Extended Zodiac), and whatever else you'd like to add, (thanks to being freed from twitter's character limit, I encourage you to tell me as much as you want about them!)

Meme/Shitpost characters are totally okay! as long as they meet the minimum req above and are a troll I dont care! On the og account I literally posted an edit of the fucking Scout from tf2 as a Rustblood

We will OCCASIONALLY do little silly events that may change some of these rules, however wait for me to announce those dont just jump in early that'll get annoying

The admin(s) running this blog is/are bodily 16 years old, sending anything nsfw will be 100% ignored. [Characters from more mature source material ARE allowed however, but again, do not send directly send me images of said mature content]

If you did not make the character PLEEASE tell me where its from or who did make them. (on or off site I don't care), the whole reason I even started this originally was to share the work of others in this fandom I love to more people. Not telling me who made the character defeats the whole purpose [Similar applies if you include art of the character NOT drawn by you please just give credit to people I beg of you]

We understand that Homestuck as a whole is a very... Interesting series thats made VERY fucking poor choices, but any sort of intolerance or shitty behavior will NOT be tolerated here. We have Zero Affiliation with Hussie nor do we endorse their past behavior or very questionable writing decisions, any unfounded accusations of such towards me or anyone else over enjoying the comic will be thrown straight in the bin, blow me. (If there are any ACTUAL issues however, please respectfully send a pm about it, Random shit in the askbox will likely be either ignored or buried)

HOW TO SUBMIT

Ironically, I'm not doing this through tumblr's built in post submissions feature. But this is because I honestly still don't know how the damn thing works yet despite being on this site so long, So submissions will be taken through our inbox or PMs.

(Not to sound rude but I'd really much prefer to not be forced to message back about needing more info, PLEASE PLEASE include it the first time around or it'll take so much longer for yours to be posted (if at all) because I have a very hard time talking to internet strangers due to reasons I'm not obligated to tell you)

[Bear in mind though Anon is currently OFF, although this may change eventually]

[nickersonagencyi]

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[pebkwiewspersabah]

Benefits for Over 60s in the UK: A Firsthand Account

I've discovered that turning 60 in the UK brought unexpected perks. Suddenly, I'm accessing a third on train travel with my Senior Railcard, and hopping on buses for free off-peak. It's made exploring more enticing, not to mention the bonus community tips. Healthcare's another win; no more prescription charges and discounted dental services mean I'm looking after my health without the worry of costs. And the social side? Cinemas, restaurants, even art classes at lower prices make every day more enjoyable. It government benefits for 60 year olds uk feels like a well-kept secret, accessing all these benefits. Stick around, and I'll share how it's breathed new life into my routine.

Travel Discounts Unveiled

Many over 60s in the UK can greatly reduce their travel costs, thanks to a variety of discounts and schemes designed with them in mind. I've personally navigated these waters and found a sea of opportunities for us to explore the country—or even just our local towns—without breaking the bank.

First off, the Senior Railcard has been a game-changer for me. It offers 1/3 off rail fares across Britain, making those visits to friends, family, and new destinations much more accessible. I've saved a bundle on my travels and it's encouraged me to venture out more often.

Then there's the bus pass, which I've found to be an invaluable asset in my day-to-day life. Once you hit the magic age, you're eligible for free off-peak travel on local buses anywhere in England. It's not just benefits for 60 a money-saver; it's a ticket to freedom and independence, especially for those of us who might not drive.

Engaging with these discounts has not just eased the strain on my wallet, but it's also given me a sense of belonging. There's a whole benefits for over 60s uk community of us taking advantage of these benefits, sharing tips, and making the most of our golden years.

Healthcare Benefits Explained

Moving on from travel perks, let's talk about something that directly impacts our well-being: healthcare benefits. I'm thrilled to share that once you hit 60, you become eligible for free prescriptions and can access NHS dental services at discounted rates. It's a relief knowing that our healthcare needs are less of a financial burden in our golden years.

Free Prescription Eligibility

I'm excited to explore how individuals over 60 in the UK can benefit from free prescription eligibility, an essential aspect of healthcare benefits. Turning 60 brought me a pleasant surprise—no more paying for prescriptions! This has been a huge relief for my budget, especially considering the rising costs of medication. It's a simple process too; all I had to do was show my proof of age at the pharmacy, and that was it. There's a profound sense of community and care in knowing that our healthcare system supports us in this way as we age. It's not just about saving money; it's about feeling valued and looked after. This benefit has made managing my health easier and less str

[teaazatea]

Tips For Permanent Cure For PCOS In Ayurveda

Ah, the notorious PCOS - it can feel like an unwanted guest crashing the party of womanhood. It disrupts hormonal balance, leading to irregular periods, excess androgens, and challenges with fertility. But fear not, dear reader! Ayurveda, the ancient Indian system of medicine, offers a holistic approach to tackle PCOS and bid it farewell for good.

What is Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS)?

PCOS, short for Polycystic Ovary Syndrome, is a hormonal imbalance that commonly troubles women during their reproductive years. It's like your body's DJ decided to play the wrong tune, leading to an excess of androgens, which are male hormones, and throwing your menstrual cycle off rhythm.

Unraveling the PCOS Symptoms

How do you know if you're dealing with PCOS? It's like a puzzle that some women find themselves dealing with, but fear not, we're here to decode it for you!

Irregularity of period cycles or absence of periods: Your periods aren't following the calendar? PCOS might be the reason behind the inconsistency or no-show.

Growth of hair on unwanted areas: Noticing hair in places it shouldn't be? PCOS can cause excess hair growth on the face, chest, or back.

Excess weight gain that's hard to shake off: Struggling to lose weight despite your efforts? PCOS might be making it harder for your body to shed those extra pounds.

Infertility issues, making conception a challenge: Facing difficulties getting pregnant? PCOS could be impacting your fertility and making conception more challenging.

Male-pattern baldness or thinning hair, often unexpected in women: Surprised by hair loss more commonly seen in men? PCOS can sometimes cause male-pattern baldness or thinning hair in women.

Do I need to Change My Lifestyle?

Yes, ofcourse, You need to get moving with regular exercise to keep those hormones in check and shed excess weight. Prioritize sleep like it's your job - aim for 7-9 hours of quality shut-eye each night. And now without wasting time, let’s jump into the Ayurvedic approach of treating PCOS.

Tips For Permanent Cure For PCOS In Ayurveda:

Meet our friend Ayurveda, the ultimate party pooper for PCOS. This 5,000-year-old healing system believes in treating the root cause rather than just the symptoms. Here's a quick rundown of how Ayurveda tackles PCOS:

Eat Right for Your Body Type:

Ayurveda isn't about one-size-fits-all diets. Instead, it encourages you to eat according to your unique constitution or dosha. For PCOS, focus on foods that pacify Kapha and Pitta, such as leafy greens, whole grains, lean proteins, and warming spices like turmeric and ginger. Say goodbye to processed junk and hello to nourishing, wholesome meals!

Ayurvedic Use of Herbs:

Ashwagandha: Also known as Indian ginseng or winter cherry, Ashwagandha helps balance cortisol levels, alleviating stress and PCOS symptoms.

Cinnamon: Beyond its use as a spice, cinnamon has shown promise in improving insulin resistance, which is common in PCOS, and regulating menstrual cycles.

Turmeric: Curcumin, the active compound in turmeric, exhibits anti-inflammatory properties and may help decrease insulin resistance, as observed in studies on PCOS-induced rats.

Cleanse and Detoxify:

Ayurveda emphasizes the importance of detoxification to rid the body of toxins that contribute to hormonal imbalances. This may involve gentle fasting, specific cleansing practices known as Panchakarma, and herbal teas specially crafted for curing PCOS.

Finally Decided to Choose Ayurveda?

Understanding the symptoms and seeking proper support and treatment is crucial for managing this condition. For those seeking relief from PCOS symptoms and looking to support their overall well-being with Ayurveda, Teaaza offers Period's Care Tea For PCOS & PCOD, designed to promote hormonal balance and support reproductive health. With carefully curated blends crafted from high-quality ingredients, Teaaza provides a refreshing and soothing way to take control of your health.

[deliahroseland]

How 2023 Became an Unproductive Year

As some may know, I have been battling with 2023 throughout the year. There have been a lot of health problems (some of which I am continuing to deal with) and mental health breakdowns. To say it has been difficult would be an understatement. Despite this, I have been (internally) kicking and screaming to make this the best year possible, but something always crops up to prove me wrong.

So, this is my story of how 2023 became my most unproductive year yet.

The Beginning of 2023 At the beginning of 2023, I was still loaded with the flu and because my birthday falls on New Year it felt like the tone was set for the year ahead. I was unwell for all of January with a chest infection and an ear infection. I wouldn't get better until February and even then I felt exhausted from the last month. I was tired and stressed which didn't help things, even if externally I was seen as doing well at work. Internally, not so much.

Planning Ahead I am a planner. I love planning my whole life out, even if there are little bumps in the road. Those bumps only mean new opportunities and new doors opening. However, none of my plans went ahead. I wanted to write more. I wanted to read more. I wanted to create music and release my first EP. However, everything creative was sucked out of me because of stress and the constant anxiety of what would happen the next day. Work was bleeding me dry because of how I was treated and how my work was being perceived. I wanted to do things but found that I couldn't. I set goals that would not be achieved because I was focussing on getting better whilst my health rapidly deteriorated. It was upsetting because I wanted to do so much, but had no energy to do so.

Not Following Through A lot of things had to be placed on hold or unfinished because I didn't follow through with them. My reasons varied. Mental health, physical health, not wanting to return to work, being ill-prepared, etc. Many goals weren't completed and I never thought to factor in illness or taking care of myself until halfway through the year. Even then, it's not enough because you never know when you will become unwell. That's something I hadn't factored into anything all year.

A Focus on Physical Health This is something I am still focussed on. At the moment, I am recovering from what I believe might have been 'freshers' flu' that swept through our cohort at university. However, it seems to have lasted longer for me. Whereas most colds only last a week or two for some people, they last more than a month for me. I would normally put it down to inheriting my dad's terrible immune system. However, this has not been a regular occurrence until very recently. Normally, by this point, the cough would have been close to going. This year it has only gotten worse without medical attention. Therefore, I have had to put my health on the frontlines against anything else at the chagrin of my bosses and probably other people too. It was a New Year's resolution for me to focus on getting better physically, although I believe this year my body has taken that to a new extreme.

Stress I mentioned it earlier, but this year has been stressful for me. Between being belittled and told everything I was doing was wrong at work and trying to complete my own goals, I found it difficult to not be stressed. Unfortunately, my goal of completing my apprenticeship at my workplace was void thanks to the demoralisation of my boss and how I was treated as an employee—one without the necessary experience to get them out of the mess they had gotten themselves into, even though I did do my best. This ongoing stress and the dread of the next day made me exhausted coming home, therefore writing and reading goals were put on the backburner as all I wanted to do was nothing for once.

Conclusion It might not seem like much, but most of this year has been a never-ending cycle of everything above. Couple that with having two months left to turn this year around and still being unwell, I have found I am completely beat by 2023. All I can hope for is this year to be over and for 2024 to be more productive and kinder to me than this year.

[rantsandotherwritings]

I have an appointment with a psychiatrist for next month. I’m a bit anxious, but mostly relieved. I’m already rehearsing my monologue.

“I need a diagnosis or a prescription or some kind of drastic lifestyle change.”

That’s what I’m going to tell him. I can’t predict what he’ll tell me though. My experiences with therapy have all been different.

The first time a saw a “counselour: was at university. One of my lecturers died suddenly in the middle of a semester and I didn’t know how to cope. I genuinely considered packing up and going home, but it was also the semester before my last and I’d have had to wait a whole year to write my finals. 

I stuck it out and met with the school counselour a few times and we talked about my general guilt over having a good time and taking breaks. She told me to watch “Gifted” with Chris Evans and wrote letters to my other lecturers so I could have extra time to finish all my final assignments. I don’t remember much else.

My next time in therapy was with a psychotherapist and it was NOT a good time. That was when I first suspected that I might be experiencing PMDD symptoms and she was not having it. It was not something she would consider, that my hormones were involved at all.

It was not a safe place for me. I didn’t really want to tell her the truth about anything, because I felt like she would judge me.

I told her about the time my boyfriend’s friend posted an inappropriate message about me on my boyfriend’s birthday and how upset I was over it and her conclusion was that I care what other people think, I care about my image. When at that point, I was just hurt that my boyfriend hadn’t stood up for me. He should have known I’d be offended by something like that.

My mom used to come with me to my sessions and wait in the lobby and my therapist implied that meant I was too dependent on my parents. In all honesty, she wasn’t wrong. I am more dependent on my parents than the average twenty-something year old. And that was NOT the evidence of that. My family’s culture is that we’re there for each other. My mom or her sister (or even I, on one occasion) take their mom to the doctor or to run tests. As much as is possible, she doesn’t go alone. Unless nobody can manage, someone always goes with the others to the doctor if they’re open to it. I couldn’t understand how this was different.

Eventually I admitted that this therapist was not for me and I stopped seeing her.

A bit later, we came across a new one. She seemed nice. She had kids. Her office was in the same building as my workplace. It was a match made in heaven. Our first session, she sent me home with a comic to read! She was so understanding and she sent me to do some hormone testing to make sure my thyroid wasn’t part of the problem. Even though my hormones were normal, it was so validating to be heard, to feel like my voice mattered.

I stopped seeing her after one session where I felt embarrassed. We were talking about the menstrual cycle and she exclaimed at my ignorance of how it worked in terms of the fluctuations of hormones and their effects at the different phases.

“You should know this??!!”

And of course she’s right, but I no longer felt safe. I felt judged and a little ridiculous. So we had a conversation about me not needing any more sessions. Then the pandemic hit, the next month I think.

Since then, my mental health has been tossed between bad and worse. I can’t even remember a time when it was good.

I’ve always been anti-medication, mostly because my parents have been. And recently a friend advised against any kind of mood-altering drug. Her withdrawals were nightmarish. And where she lives, the mental health care system is so much better than where I live, so IDK if it’s a risk worth taking.

But I am also tired. I don’t want to have to accept that this is just the way it is, that this is how it will always be. I need some kind of intervention.

[conceptoclinic-uk]

You Need to Know about The Hormonal Imbalance Test

There are certain problems related to hormonal imbalances in our body and it is very important to know about them by doing a test. Therefore, it is advised to get a hormonal imbalance test at a Health Care Solutions UK . Many people don’t know this and they face a lot of problems. So it’s better to get it tested beforehand. Additionally, both of these imbalances can result in signs including exhaustion, mood swings, digestive problems, and unexplained weight gain or loss. Because of this, it's crucial to preserve the balance of our endocrine system as a whole to keep it functioning properly. You need to avail yourself of the Harmony Prenatal Test UK from Concepto Diagnostics.

These are the main signs of hormonal imbalance suggested by the Diagnostic Clinic in the UK that you should watch out for.

Fatigue

Everybody gets tired occasionally. But with enough rest, water, and a balanced diet, you should be able to recover. Consider getting a thorough assessment of your hormone levels if you feel like you are taking care of yourself but are still worn out or just can't seem to bounce back.

Anxiety

It's not all in your brain, not at all. Each year, over 18% of Americans experience an anxiety-related disorder, and 7% experience a serious depressive illness. Because fluctuations in estrogen during menstrual cycles, pregnancy, or menopause are linked to increased depression, women may be at a higher risk.

Putting on weight or struggling to shed it

Usually, it's a result of their nutrient-poor diet and excessive exertion. The body interprets this effort as stress, and when the body is under stress, it enters "fight-or-flight" or survival mode and releases cortisol.

Skin and hair modifications

One quick indicator of a suspected hormonal imbalance is a rapid increase in acne. Androgens are one of the few hormones in play. Sebum can accumulate in your pores and lead to a breakout if your body generates too many androgens.

 Hormones are sophisticated, potent substances. Several symptoms might make you feel as though you don't have control over your body if one or more of them are out of balance. It's crucial to discuss your symptoms with the Nutrition consultant in the UK if they are new and persistent. You'll be able to feel like yourself again as soon as you seek out assistance and therapy.

 Also Read: 5 important concerns about the quality and safety of multivitamins