#( im kinda online? im mostly working on stuff )

[redsleuthed]

sorry if im silent. i'm trying to get all the inbox memes out of the way and adding them to my drafts. thank you for your patience.

[shevr]

never feeling right in saying any of whatever i got going on is due to some kind of burnout because it always feels like burnout implies you actually tried & managed to do something cool & impressive to get to that point

[13eyond13]

.

[itsalwaysdark]

no sims 5 . guys im gonna

[exculis]

one thing i have learned about myself is that i am really really bad at grocery shopping. if theres food in the house i can usually figure out something to do with it. how does the food get to my house tho? beats me. i will realize im low on food and go damn thats crazy i should buy more groceries

i open the grocery ordering website. i stare at it. it stares at me. the front page advertises things like electronics and a bicycle. i cannot eat those though.

i close the website. i will buy groceries another day.

[jellitchi]

artist au... smiles

more under the cut

artist au where grian and scar are both artists. they met in college coz they both were assigned each other as a roomie and they both just really clicked🙊... anyways got a place tgt, now they js live tgt. this au is just them being domestic sorry its very boring😭...

grian is a freelance artist, looking for work. he mostly works with acrylics and oil paints but has been kinda stumped recently n has been rly into pottery. hes trying sculpture but its kinda difficult for him to get the hang of it. mostly likes using the pottery wheel. he helps out as an assistant in art classes at the college he graduated from sometimes, sometimes does figure drawing art modeling whatever thats called when asked? shrugs

scar is an architect (act surprised) who has like a legitimate Talent for art. this kinda pisses grian off (competitive) coz grian does study after Study.... and art js doesnt click for him the way it seems to click for scar and it frustrates him. They still r esch others motivation and inspiration (CORNYYYY) anyways back to scar hes mostly does like Ideas / drafts... he rly wants to do landscaping but he js has a knack for buildings- like apts, shops, office spaces yeah... Like Ideally he wants to do theme park stuff Then landscaping- but he has a stable career working as a building architect so he just is content. he mostly works from home, most of his work is online so a lotta his colleagues r js like Via Zoom And whatever so he rly like getting out when he can

grian usually is like Im going to go sit and draw in the Rose Gardens. and scar joins him they do parallel play or whatever

Btw theyre not tgt theyre just heavily pinning (Theyve been pinning for the last 5 yrs.

[nyancrimew]

how do you cope with the fact that you probably have many people following you who have severely wrong and stupid beliefs that they hold obnoxiously while refusing to learn and probably assume you agree with them on these because that's how parasocial relationships work ?

i honestly mostly just ignore all the parasocial stuff and i dont really care about breaking the maia people imagine i am in their head (That One Bi Lesbian Tweet lead to people posting about how their "entire world just shattered") cause like idk, it's not healthy and i do not owe you anything with regards to who you think i am. it's also why i try my best to be a grounded and approachable person without feeding into parasocial stuff, like if i do public hangouts (online or in person) i try to actually just have friendly chats with people and ideally not have it just be a onesided thing where i am just lifted even more onto a pedestal. this doesn't always work of course, and is also why for the longest time i was kinda against running a discord server that's essentially about me.

i enjoy having an audience and playing with that, but i try to somewhat minimize the fandomization of it as far as i can do that myself. this isn't like a callout or anything, but yea try to just stay grounded, im just a silly lil girl and not a goddess who's literally perfect in every way, i will fuck up and it probably won't be the end of the world as long as you don't expect me to never fail.

[godhandler]

seeing you doomscroll at 2am

nanami would be slightly worried, telling you to think of your health and maintain proper sleep schedules (he is a big fat hypocrite because why is he up at 2am doing paperwork). "if you have time to watch asmr cooking videos you better use it productively, honey." he won't actually nag tho because nanami of all people gets that adult life is hard, if these silly videos make you feel a little happy who is he to deny you that? would offer to work in bed so that he can be near you while also making sure that you do sleep.

gojo is probably working hard mid-mission or creating lesson plans lol. at this point in life he doesn't actually know what time people are supposed to sleep. "ooh, im jealous~ send me any fun reels if you find them, 'kay?" if he has no mission (once in a millenia), he's doomscrolling alongside you, pushing his phone in your face now and then to show you smn like 'cat falls from 10th floor, lands on feet!' or a insta post of a woman in a bikini - 'see that would look good on you. or me. we're good looking <3'

shoko wouldn't know. she's dead to the world the second her exhausted and overworked head hits the pillow. she'd put the pieces together when you're still sleeping the next day till noon with your glasses on and phone in hand. wouldn't care that much tbh. chill girlfriends fr.

toji sees you scrolling in the dark when he wakes up at night to pee, will poke his head in to see judge your the kinda shit you waste time on. "the hell are those white boys putting cat ears on for?" or "how many times are ya gonna watch jay park shake ass?" or "tumblr. loser." toji probably pees at 2-3 times per night. idk why. i just know.

kamo doesn't doomscroll. he just doesn't. thinks it's a nasty childish habit, like vaping or interacting with tiktok in any form. pre getting kicked out the clan, i think it would genuinely lower his opinion of you a bit. it's like, he doesn't want himself or his significant other to be that kind of person who doomscrolls till late and sleeps thru work/classes next morning like a slob. post, he wouldn't like it but he can shrug it off. as long as you still wake up on time next morning.

sukuna "this is so stupid. your recommendations suck. you should watch more educational informative videos, news and shit, learn a language instead of wasting your time like this. egirls are ugly."- all while watching your phone with his head over your shoulder. he has opinions on every reel you watch and will make himself heard.

higuruma "what's doomscroll?" this man is pushing 40 and is an introvert. his knowledge of social media is liking his friends' throwback pics on facebook. he'd be interested if you're shopping online, "love, can you order my woollen socks too? please make sure they cover the ankle and isn't more than 30% polyester. thanks, love." but otherwise he's a big 'phones at night harm your brain' kinda guy.

nobara, yuji, megumi all three forward each other reels on a LINE group chat named smn stupid that yuji and nobara agreed upon after much debate, like 'three musketeers (in english to be fancy)' or 'nobara and the dwarves' or 'diaper gang 😛'. yuji sends stuff he thinks others would like (baby duck vids). nobara sends stuff she likes (xiaohongshu fashion inspo). megumi doesn't reply or send much of anything, will leave the group if the other send too much brainrot content but they keep adding him back in. megumi watches mostly reels talking about recent discoveries in outer space and those carpentry videos where the wood just perfectly slides into place and locks together.

choso is a complete phone addict. see he initially didn't understand a lot of human society stuff so he just googled everything he didn't get cuz he's a proud man who doesn't want to bother people with his questions and ended developing a social media addiction lol. types super fast. knows every trending trend on every sm even though he doesn't post anything. he's doomscrolling harder than you.

[backofhismomsmercury]

spencer reid nsfw alphabet

( @backofhismomsmercury edition :3 )

18+ mdni. or don’t, what u view online is up 2 u.

this is like mostly softdom!spencer (what else is new)

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

tooth achingly sweet. like just so so so soo loving, he’d just lay with you and hold you and tell you how good you did/how proud he is, and how much he loves and appreciates you (im gnawing at the bars of my enclosure)

b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

literally his brain lol, but also he likes his hair a lot, (even if he looks like he doesn’t brush it half the time lol) i think he likes having it played with/brushed/pulled (braided even..? he likes the feeling, finds it relaxing.)

he also likes his hands (he thinks they’re pretty?) i don’t think he knows why, but other people like them. which he doesn’t really understand because they’re always cold and not really soft because of how much he washes them. but he knows people like them, so he likes them. 

his fav on you is probs your legs/thighs. he likes having them wrapped around him, and he likes laying on them, he just thinks they’re pretty.

c = cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

his own? he thinks it’s messy, gross, doesn’t like when it gets everywhere and probably hates even touching it. doesn’t like feeling sticky or sitting with it, he cleans it up right away. definitely doesn’t like the idea of you swallowing it. (he’d probs still let you if you REALLY wanted to.)

but yours..? ohhh he loves it. (still thinks its kindaaa gross, just cuz it is what it is.) but he’d like having it on him, he’d like watching you cum too, esp. on his hands or thigh.

d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

LOVEEESSSS HAVING HIS HAIR PULLEDDDD. idk why i just feel this in my gut. not too rough though.. he’s sensitive :( but just a little bit. like while he’s going down on you or even just making out. doesn’t matter, just pull it. (now if we’re talking about sub!spencer OHHHH he loves it even more, he’ll deadass start crying, lol fucking loser.)

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

he’s not reeaallllyyy experienced, but he fucks from time to time, he knows what he’s doing. he’s smart, he’s read up on this shit. 

f = favorite position (this goes without saying)

the basics, and anything where he can see your face. i think he likes being underneath you. even if he’s acting more dominant, i think he still likes being in a more submissive position.

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

he’s somewhere in between, but probs more serious. i think he gets in his own head and wants to make sure he’s doing everything right

h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

verrrryyyyy well trimmed, he hates germs and feeling gross. i think he’d actually take a lot of time trimming it and making it feel and look clean, mostly for his own peace of mind.

also, i’d love to be like “he’s grown!!! he doesn’t care if his partner has hair!!!” but ngl that's just not possible because he actually thinks it's gross. just shave and he’ll be fine.

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

ohh this mf is sappy as FUCK. he’s such a romantic at heart, he’d take his time & go slow and it’d just be constant ‘i love you’s and praise.

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)

i think in the early seasons, he doesn’t do it a lot. when he does he just feels kinda bad about it. he knows it's not wrong, it just makes him feel weird. maybe as time goes on he does it more, i don’t really know tbh.

k = kink (one or more of their kinks)

honestly i don’t think he’s really kinky. i think a lot of stuff would be hard for him to get into because he sees so much insane shit at work all the time (again, he’s sensitive) but like i said i think he lovvveeeess when you pull his stupid perfect hair. 

l = location (favorite places to do the do)

at home. his or yours, doesn’t matter. he wouldn’t do anything in public, i think he’s waaayyy too anxious for that. he’d be CONVINCED that someone would see you, and he’d be too nervous to even do a good job lol. i don't think he’d really care where at home, but he’d mostly like the bed or the couch, just somewhere where he can take his sweet time. i think he’d appreciate the shower from time to time though.

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

literally anything you do. you. you. you!!! he just loves you!!!! he lovesss hearing your voice, especially when you’re talking about something you learned. i think spencer finds your intelligence so attractive because he was embarrassed about his own for a long time. (idk if that makes sense ??? but whatever)

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

i think the list of shit he’s not into is a lottttttt longer than the list of shit he likes lol. idk he’s just not really kinky, but he definitely wouldn’t be into feet, piss/scat, anal, anything age related, the list goes on.. i think he’s just very normal and he’s okay with that. 

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

not to be too controversial.. cause i do think he loves giving, but i think he LOVVVEEESS receiving. he’s a man after all, he would love some good head. he’ll always return the favor though.

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

he’s too not rough and he never would be, he wouldn’t want to hurt you. i think his general pace is somewhere in between, not too slow, not too fast, but he’ll go faster if you ask him to.

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

he doesn’t like them. again, he likes to take his sweet time!!!

r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

like i said, i don’t think he’s really kinky but i do think he’d be down to try some stuff. he just wouldn’t bring anything up, he’d wait for you to suggest whatever.

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

i deadass think he passes out after once round. i mean come on, he doesn’t work out, he’s a fucking pipe cleaner (with eyes.) he’s just not going for more than maybe 2 rounds max. i think he can maybe last a while during one round, but he gets sleepy fast. (aww :3)

t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

i don’t think he cares for them. would probably be open though?

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

spencer doesn’t ever like to see you in and kind of discomfort, but he does like to tease quite a bit, and he knows you like it too. it never lasts too long though. (mostly because you beg and ask him so nicely, but also because it makes him feel kinda mean.)

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

oh he’s LOUDDD. especially sub!spencer. that mf whimpers and whines like there's no tomorrow. i think softdom!spencer is loud too, but he tries to be quieter cause he wants to hear you.

w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

would let you peg him. wouldn’t ask though. (i will not be writing this, don’t ask lol)

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

LONG AND SKINNY!!!! just like the rest of his body. 

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

it’s not too high, but it’s definitely not low. just thinking about you makes him dizzy, but he has pretty good self control.

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

INSTANTLY. he’s a sleepy guy!!!!! spencer obviously doesn’t have a lot of physical energy to begin with so i think it’s quite exhausting for him. (but he loves it)

<3

thank you so much for reading!!! i had so much fun writing this!!!! :)

sorry i haven't been super active, i've been quite busy these last few weeks, but i'll be back with some new stuff soon i promise!! hope this can feed you guys until then.. lol :)))

[r0t-t1ngxeyy]

*~•`°🌟 LEVIATHAN HEADCANONS

Because he's silly asf

Get it up - Mindless Self Indulgence (A song he'd listen to im not gonna lie)

I think we can all agree he might be on the spectrum autism right??? Right????

He literally info dumps Mc and that's like the first interaction where he isn't stuttering or degrading himself!! He's into TSL, Ruri chan, and that idol group too ig👽

100% chubby. That or if he does work out, probably a sleeper build. But I'm sticking to him being a lil chubby!!

Unlike Beel, he doesn't really work out so the stuff he eats which mostly is junk food (Cup noodles and what not) give into his chub:33 I think he might run around anime cons or work out a bit to impress his stream though lol!!

He definitely streams 100%!! There's probably a whole group of deviltubers he's in as well.

He probably mostly streams fps games, horror games (he's a pussy though), and sometimes shitty dating sims just for a good laugh. This might actually be canon but I don't remember

Pale. Not heavenly pale, sickly pale.

Unlike Asmodeus or even Satan, he looks like a horror game protagonist kinda pale LOLL!!

You'd catch him in his demon form all the time

He just fucks heavy with it. It's comforting actually!! It gives him a sense of strength. A reminder that he's the Avatar of Envy, not just some otaku. So..it's more of an ego-boost lol

Chronically online. Heavily chronically online!!

Ever since the fall, he's been cooped up all his life in Devildom. Soon discovering that an online presence might not be too bad, he dives wayy too deep into the depths for his own good. The internet was his coping mechanism, and still is. Even if he does go outside (every once in a while) he's always on his phone.

So he unironically uses internet slang irl. Ranging from simple 'Omg', 'Lol' to full blown 'backspace', 'F', 'Why are you talking to me in caps'. He swears it's just a joke but his streams prove otherwise.

"That's so cancel worthy"

"Mogged that shit up right there"

Probably an incel (As a joke) (He wouldn't actually)

He watches female streamers, not just any BUT specifically Female Vtubers. It's just so funny to think of holy moly!!! Most of the time he makes fan accounts online as a joke but it can get out of hand

[caelyne]

school school school. this month has been quite busy for me. lots of work. to be expected though! writing a thesis paper is no joke... i couldve definitely started it sooner though. there was just a lot.. anxiety? over starting it, for some reason. but it's making good progress! i think!

im moving soon too. out of state. away from where i grew up. probably forever! it's scary. scary in the way that my life will be different. different world, different people. though i guess i mostly live online.. so that won't be too different at least.

ive been thinking about my dad lately. i don't have the best relationship with him. we dont hate each other, and i think he'd be happy to see me more. but i have.. trouble wanting to feel the same way. when my parents separated, i took the sudden change really rough. for both my mom and dad, i had trouble adjusting to how things were gonna be. i remember being so angry. got into so much trouble for being so angry. trouble as in like, ooo bad cat meow meow no gamecube for a week, nothing serious.

other stuff happened with my dad as time went on. i remember him taking me to get my long hair cut short as punishment. i was later told this was really bad of him, and that it made total sense for me to be Extremely Upset. i kinda had to hide it though, i told people at school i just Felt like it. felt embarrassing to admit that this was a punishment. i don't think he knew how to deal with me tbh. i think he probably tried his best and maybe was misguided or something. idk.

its stuff like that that makes me anxious about telling him I'm moving away. possibly forever. i haven't spoken to him in years. i don't think he knows what I'm doing these days.

is that ok? it doesnt feel ok. it makes me feel bad. but I'm scared to do anything else but kick this rock down the road as time crawls forward. he has a daughter now too, a half sister that i haven't seen in years. i think she was like. 6? or something last i was visiting. i don't even remember how long ago that was. its scary. time is scary. and yet it goes. and goes.

school school school. school school school. meow.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for using my moms money to buy games?

The title sounds bad, but I'm not sure how else to word it. This is also going to be a weird one as, in advance, I know the other party isn't an asshole, however I think it's a similar situation im tone and I really need some feedback on this.

I'm 22 and live with my mom and cat. I've lived with her my whole life, and continue to due to disability. My mom has 2 jobs that she mainly works on weekends, and I'm unemployed. Ever since covid it's been incredibly difficult for me to find work because it is still very much a thing despite what people want to believe, and I can't be in contact with random people physically due to immune issues and the chance of getting sick. Online jobs are apparently very hard to find (my mom has tried) and many ask for a payment beforehand. I do however get social security income that pays most of our bills/utilities, and we're also on foodstamps for groceries.

My family has never been well off. I wouldn't call us dirt poor, we've never had to go hungry, and I always had toys to play with/clothes as a kid. But my mom has had to manage funds well and we've never had a lot of money for leisure or frivolous purchases. My mom will buy herself things like some new clothes, a phone charger, roku set, etc smaller things like that when she gets her paycheck but extra expenses such as furniture have to be planned out probably weeks/months ahead of time. We also moved recently and ever since then our budget has been more difficult, the down payment really screwed with my moms expenses.

Because of our situation, I never really had games growing up. I remember we had maybe 3 big family consoles during me and my sisters whole childhood (with like 3-6 games on them each, most of which were guitar hero which my mom and sister loved to play), and I would get a new handheld for myself every few years. I never got to play the new exciting games people were always talking about, and my gaming experience has really been limited to like. Animal crossing, the sims, and cooking mama.

I played a bunch of roms as a kid so that helped, but I was always kinda sad and felt left out that I never got to experience gaming the way other people did. I really wanted to try the "classics" people talked about but didn't have any way to. People (especially as I got into my 20s and started following streamers + nintendo direct for example) would always talk about the New Thing coming out and playing it the day it dropped, all the excitement and community people had around that, but if I really wanted that kind of game, I'd have to wait a few years before getting it and trying it out, and by then no one was playing it anymore anyways.

As time went on things got a little better. Especially because of my moms new jobs, both of which she genuinely loves doing, though it's still work, we have been a bit better off. It's only been recently we started struggling more again.

Recently I've been kind of asking for things from my mom. Mostly it's steam games. I found I've gotten much more into gaming as a hobby as I've gotten older, and I have a long wishlist of games that I really want to get into, but of course have no money to myself. I should also clarify that NONE of these are those big triple A $60 titles, as I still can't ever justify paying something so expensive for one game. So sometimes lately I've been asking my mom "hey, can I get this/these games?" And use her money/card to purchase them. I don't do it constantly, or even super often, but I feel like it's becoming more often and it makes me feel really guilty.

I have done this before, around high school I started asking my mom for certain things I wanted around the house, and usually she had no problem buying them for me. This also wasn't large stuff, nothing ever over $30 and usually only up to $20. But when I'd find something I *really* wanted, especially if it was a time limited thing like merch drops from a favorite content creator, often yarn for my knitting or art supplies I wanted to try, I would ask her.

I've pretty much always felt guilty about this. I would ask for something despite my better judgement, and for the most part my mom would say yes, and that it was okay, whereas I was the one apologizing and asking if it was "really alright". She has told me she has no issues buying things for me as long as I ask her. She says the social security I get is "technichally my money", and that she wants me to be able to use it. (Obviously we don't use the actual ssi to buy random shit, but her giving me spending money is the next best thing).

Every time I've asked my mom for something like this, I've told myself that it would be the last time, that I would get my own job and own money and not mooch on my mom anymore, but both with the stress of chronic illness and depression I never seem to get around to it. I try to do dishes and keep my room clean, take care of the cat etc as ways I can help without working, but for some reason the money really weighs on me. I know that it's really my fault, I haven't even been looking for jobs and I could always take art commissions again, but somehow a mental block always stops me.

I feel like I have a bit of an impulsivity problem when it comes to spending. The money I got from my one summer job and commissions would never last long, and honestly I couldn't even tell you what I spent it on for the weeks I had it. I have issues taking money from people, but when I realized that I may not have had the stuff I wanted as a kid simply because I never asked for/communicated that I wanted it, it made me more bold to actually ask my mom for things.

I never pester my mother about this. I'll ask once and if she says no I'll be dissapointed but won't continue. Sometimes she says that we don't have the money for it then, or that I'll have to wait until xyz thing is paid for, which is always fine. I also have *never* bought anything with her money without asking first. I get pretty much all the steam games I buy on sale (usually that's what prompts me to ask about them, actually) as personally I can't justify getting games for their asking price for the experience I'm going to get.

I feel bad as I feel like I'm wasting our money, mooching off my mom and not putting in the work to have spending money myself. I also worry that sometimes when she says it's fine, it's untrue and she's really just trying to make me feel better. I also sometimes don't play the games as soon as I get them, I have a sizeable backlog of games I have gotten but haven't "got around" to playing as I was excited to get them at a low price at the time, but then haven't felt like I'm in the right mood. This also makes me feel worse because I feel like I'm not being appreciative enough of her buying for me.

So am I the asshole?

What are these acronyms?

[cozymochi]

mochi, I just wanna remind you that your work is appreciated and your creativity is something I admire greatly

The detail and effort you put in each drawing always comes through in the end. I could truly stare forever at a single piece and still find things I haven't noticed before

I use your drawings often as references for shading (something I struggle with) and it has helped me in a big way

We adore you, mochi. You are a lovely member of the twisted wonderland artist community, and I wish you all the best online and in life

ahh, thank u mysterious shadow person 🩷 at least something’s helping somewhere 😭 thO i promise i don’t really know what i’m doing either and i call my creativity into question on a constant basis

but that’s still nice to say— mostly cuz I pretty much prescribe to the usual expected “haha i see this and move on instantly” assumption thanks to the way current internet mass consumption is set up. That and lol I don’t really think I’m doing anything all that notable or distinct enough to warrant much fanfare. Or anything interesting lol. So on, and forth etc. etc. I literally can’t even take normal compliments without suspicion

I AM NORMAL (questionable)

I’ll probably see my stuff reposted excessively to Pinterest though. (Not a flex)

thank u tho 😭 sorry idk what to really say im kinda notoriously bad at this

[eebie]

2024 for me

- shadowed my bro over spring break and collaborated on art with him for an album that got a grammy nomination which was pretty cool

- graduated highschool like a boss

- finally met two friends who i’d known online since i was 13

- got pretty active on twitter for a while doing undertale stuff

- joined a cool UT project that im still working on

- drove 11 hours to college

- dated somebody for the first time

- spent part of my birthday sitting in a downpour waiting for a bus that never came. it was nice but i was completely soaked by the time i got home

- went stargazing in a park with my roommate and her friends at 4:00 am

- learned about ram ranch & cum trutherism

- got into photography Kinda

- played a video game on a computer for the first time in like 3 years

- made a lot of new friends

- collabed with a buddy on a video

- got a haircut & gained an interest in cool hats

- met a tumblr mutual IRL unknowingly

- made the deans list

- spent a lot of time alone & got to know myself a little better

- egg cracked(…?)

most of this year was very blurry and i’m no less neurotic than i was at the start of it but the key things that i do remember are mostly positive so i give it a solid 80

[raayllum]

im new to the fandom, so I miss a lot of the discourse (helped ofc by the fact you're kinda the only dp blog I follow), so everytime you mention the s4 backlash I'm like....how in the world could people hate that season or rayllum in it? It doesn't compute for me!

The last ship I was particularly engaged with, has a lot of similarities with rayllum. They were best friends, life partners before they were ever /romantic/ life partners. And they went through a /lot/ of trauma, miscommunication, and being on opposite sides of the same fight, etc etc.

the difference to rayllum was that they never rlly gave each other the grace they need. They also never talked on screen, but unlike rayllum it wasn't because it was the best option for them, it's just that the writers didn't want to include it ever - to the point that when they finally did an episode addressing it, it landed...very flat? Because it was about six seasons in, addressing things as far back as the second season, that they'd apparently never spoken to each other about before (they were tragically engaged when this happened).

Rayllum GENERALLY but especially in s4 have a really special place in my heart, because they feel very realistically messy - but it doesn't feel like it's there so there's some drama to keep audiences hooked. It feels authentic, and is one of those rare cases where it strengthens their relationship. I definitely could buy that rayllum would survive anything that hit their relationship by the end of s3, but getting to actually SEE that and see how much they're willing to work through out of love and respect for each other? Fantastic.

(also like it's such good character development....i am with u in the s4 defense squad. is there a squad? If there is I'm in it)

First off welcome to the fandom and I hope you're having a good time!!

The fact that my blog is mostly discourse free cause while I tag accordingly (fandom nonsense and dragons gets salty for potential blacklisting purposes) I always worry I can dip too far into that on occasion (I do my best not to unless being called out by name, and even then mostly do my best to ignore stuff), but there's not too much discourse within TDP in general — at least not in the Rayllum corner, luckily.

I think that's why the S4 backlash really surprised and threw me for a loop, because my partner and I finished the season at like 7AM on release day and while different than expected, we loved it and thought it was great from the start. Then we went online and people in the fandom who I'd largely always agreed with were having a really hard time with the season and it was disheartening at least to not have many people to talk to about why 1) S4 is TDP's thematically strongest season thus far and that's still true, 2) it's Ezran's best season imo, and 3) it does a lot of things really really well in really interesting ways.

I always try to never come down Too Hard on the s4 backlash just because people are of course entitled to their feelings/opinions then as well as now (even if some people's tunes have definitely changed), but a lot of it did feel sometimes short sighted if not immature.

Like soo many people are still mad that Rayla and Callum broke up in an offscreen graphic novel, when S4 would still be S4 regardless of whether TTM existed and like... if Rayla worrying that she failed (again) and went off on her own (again) to protect Callum was a big logical leap, then that person honestly just wasn't paying attention; there's not much else to say there. I also think it's just a strange choice to assume that Nothing Major would change the second you find out about a timeskip; like, almost everything else is status quo, Rayla being gone is the One Major Change and people couldn't handle that being a Surprise?

Like you said, conflict between a couple is not inherently a bad thing; it can be good and interesting, and this was always a relationship hurdle I think a lot of Rayllums (myself included) expected Rayla and Callum to have to tackle. Not liking how extreme or 'dramatic' it was (ie. season long arc > just a few episodes, or Rayla leaving > just trying to leave) is fair enough, but given that it's rooted in so much of Rayla's character, I'd much rather take a long way around approach that's in depth. I'm also just Glad and Grateful that the show is tackling it and treating it like the issue it is rather than sweeping things under the rug.

The fact that Callum's version of anger wasn't the one people wanted is another issue, but again — his anger went the way I'd always thought it might if he just went through enough trauma, and even if he had yelled at her, I don't think the season would've necessarily gone any different than it did other than them crying more early on. Which I've written and wouldn't have minded, but I also don't dislike the alternative route canon took — of course they were never going to get all variations out there, but Callum is cold as hell and being a bit of a jerk while also being valid and tempering himself because he doesn't want to hurt her anymore than she wants to hurt him (and Callum has always been very very bad at being/staying mad with Rayla or Ezran anyway).

I saw a lot of pushback against Rayllum being 'platonic' (which was annoying as an aromantic person lemme tell you, as though platonic is lesser), being "broken up for no reason" (Rayla being hyper-independent was not a secret and always going to be what threatened to rip them apart; they are also still Visibly and Repeatedly In Love with each other how is that broken up), or that they didn't get to have a Big Feelings Time in S4.

With that in mind, there's a lot that also matters in a relationship beyond just Open Communication, tbh. There's going to be times in life where you're not able to or unwilling to talk about certain things (given that S4 is maybe a week, I think that's reasonable; especially when Rayllum still haven't talked to each other about it as of s5 and no one I saw have an issue in S4 about it has complained about it there) and like... how do you treat each other when you're still mad or confused and haven't talked everything out? Do you still take care of each other, are you still doing your best to be considerate of each other (even if you're also not going to be perfect)? That shit matters just as much if not more as people able to sit down and hash things out.

I think the truth is a lot of the things that pissed people off about S4 would've been true even if the opposite things had happened:

N'than is flat and under developed unlike Ellis → N'than is more developed → why is N'than taking away from screentime for other characters?

The Sunfire plotline feels disconnected from the rest of the story (nvm that Viren's arc from 1x06 onwards doesn't affect any main character again until 3x04) → the Sunfire plot line has more connections to the main cast crammed in → more complaints about pacing and things feeling overly stuffed, as scenes already change from one to the next quite clearly

Callum and Rayla have a big talk sometime between 4x03-4x07 → this doesn't give Callum enough time to be angry / makes him seem unreasonable because he's admitted he was mostly worried but is still not fully letting her in despite her spilling her guts to him (and in what world would Rayla give excuses, again, when she knows he's the one hurting and taking priority in her mind)

S4's humor was bad because there were fart jokes (in one episode) → the crowlord's joke is so much worse than the fart jokes imo and is on par with the walnut joke in 1x06. also 1-2 scenes with jokes that didn't work for you out of 9 whole ass episodes is like. you're just a wuss i'm sorry

The Sunfire plot line is boring → will never not feel like "I just can't connect or be interested in politics and religious disagreements when it's mostly about Black people for Some Reason (racism)" to me tbh

There was no way to please everyone especially after a three year hiatus (because people think, For Some Reason, that how much time it takes for a story to come out should change how that story is written and it really, really doesn't) but yeah. The internet showed their asses and I was Not Impressed lmao

TLDR; a lot of the S4 backlash was "I'm mad this isn't happening now and I'm stressed out/worried that it won't be" as opposed to "this is only a problem if it never happens at all, but I have faith that it will," and I will love S4 forever. The Callum-Viren parallels being ramped up, the theme of duality and moving "doing terrible things for love" to the forefront with multiple characters (Rayla, Terry, Viren, Claudia), seeing Ezran step into his role as king, Callum's arc being shown > told, the set up for the possession plot line, Janaya's engagement and relationship development + Amaya and Janai's independent arcs? Chef's kiss. S4 is my best friend and its Rayllum dynamic is on par with S3 for me, and I am very grateful the fandom's attitude towards s4 and s4 Rayllum is a lot warmer / more reasonable now

When Callum says "unconditionally" in 5x01 and all their stuff in S5 we know and believe it because we've seen them fight and work so hard to come back from some pretty terrible brinks in imperfect ways, and I'll always love s4 for that. The most aspec Rayllum season by far

[crushedsweets]

ANSWERING ASKS PT 4?

ok this is like 30+ asks LOL its mostly stuff about me/my art with a little crp sprinkled in im sorry... ill make a post thats actually answering the crp asks with real answers that arent "ILL DO IT EVENTUALLY I SWEAR" lololol

YOURE BOTH SO SWEET i havent been this passionate about smth in so long so hopefully im here for a while... thank u guys for indulging me. it makes me happy to post LOL

with love pls dont call me that buuuut. ninakate. ticciwork. ninatoby. ticcijack. ninajack. notice how its all in the same group...

hiii i dont plan to anytime soon! IF I WERE TO, cody and rouge are probably 'next in line' to being put in my AU, but i have no plans to actually commit to that

omg ok its funny cuz rn i HAVE ONE but its just me in it cuz im too lazy to organize all the bots and verification and whatnot. im also nervous about making a server cuz of some online occurrences that happened after u sent this HAHA so i'm kinda putting it off... but i reblogged tombs server and im sometimes active in there if u wanna join that one!

ffrhrughagahhhh

no ur right theyre such a power couple. i know we joke about toby being useless bf and clocky being badass gf but they're both really cool together.

I FORGOT I MADE THE TWILIGHT COMMENT LMFAAAOOOOOO I NEED i need. i need toby to find a random twilight shirt at a thrift and snag it for kate.

ME TOOOO its so delightful. i have so much fun playing with them like barbies.. making them kiss n whatever. LMFAOOOO so silly but yk

JEFF STANS ARE SO FUNNYYYYYYYYY i like you guys. laughing jack stans scare me but thats cuz that damn clown scares me... nothing that yall have done. youre just braver than me. LOL

i will not do this...

no literally its really bad. i hold horrible grudges BAHAHA but im working on it. im getting over my purple beef

omg. i listened to it and that was really cool. i like that thank u sm for sharing

IDK WHAT POST UR REFERING TO BUT YOURE RIGHT. LMAOOOOO

IM SORRYYYY im so sorry. i feel like this fandom is so small and most of the fans dont really ship in general so it suuuucks shipping here.. but i love them..

oh my god i need to i keep forgetting. the nina art i jus tposted of her holding th eknife was kinda.. kinda referencing her behaviors..

i do too!!! ive been neglecting them so bad im so sorry..

like the IEPFB tea party scene

I NEVER DID IT ANON IM SO SORRY IM GOING TO HELL

is this a song

i have not! i havent read alot of stories actually... i kinda like doing my own thing with them HAHA

omfg i had a clocknina drawing but i ended up privating but i think i should unprivate it...

ok actually im sorry i just am bad at requests omfg LMFAOO IM SORRY im so focused on nina ... forgive me...

THANK YOUUUU youre very sweet i appreciate you!!! <3

YEAH he's...one of the more tragic people. 100%. all loss

WHAT IS LIUJONJACK LOL WHOS JON??? ALSO LIUOTPS IS FUNNY

wdym ? !

LMFAOOOOO HEY ITS NOT A BAD COMBO THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING A NINAKATE SHIPPER........

THANK YOU CUPCAKE i really like nina.. or my version i gues si dunno.. i like everyone else's nina too. i like this nina we got going on together

ok i keep grouping these together but also making them seperate im so bad at organizing these asks but HAHA I LOVE THEM TOO i swear ill try to get some ticciwork stuff out soon!!! my spring semester is almost over so hopefullyyy..

this is how you know i suck ass cuz this was christmas time and im replying NOW. im so sorry. i initially planned to draw them hanging around a tree but i didnt get around to it then got embarassed and never replied.... but i agree it would have been cute. ha di notfailed. LOL