#( crushing crystals and mapping them out )

[adventuringalchemy]

taking a minor break from asks to say that i am still thinking about making ivor a potioncraft au. nobody will rp with me in it because who would rp such an obscure, niche game? but... i wanna do it.

[joelswritingmistress]

Camp Crystal Lake: Chapter 5

Requested by @yellowjacketsbuzzbuzz

Joel Miller x f!reader (romance/horror)

Setting: Camp Crystal Lake

The reader is taking on the position of a camp counselor at the infamous Camp Crystal Lake. While she begins to enjoy her summer, even crushing on the camp director Joel, a killer lurks in the woods unbeknownst to anyone.

Crazy Ralph had been the buzz of the morning conversations. Joel eased everyone’s minds about the old man, and I was certain he probably wasn’t dangerous, regardless of how creepy his sudden appearance was. Annie was the only who remained slightly spooked, though I could understand why. If I had been the one to first encounter Ralph at the door it probably would have hit me differently, too.

Around eleven-thirty that morning, everyone had scattered around the assembly of picnic tables just outside to the left of the main cabin. Teri and Vicky sat side-by-side. I couldn’t remember the guy’s name with the wavy hair, but he lingered beside them with one foot up on the picnic table bench. I smirked to myself when I saw Teri give her friend a look and roll her eyes.

I was lucky that I naturally clicked with Sandra. She patted the spot beside where her, Jeff and Ted sat, and so I joined them.

“Hey, what’s green and red and goes a hundred miles per hour?” Ted asked. Goofiness radiated out of him and it made me chuckle.

“What Teddy?”

“A frog in a blender.”

“Ha, ha,” Jeff said dryly, “That’s not funny.”

Ted reached for a whistle around his neck and gently blew it, making his friend swing back and hit him gently. “I’m just testing this thing out, Jeff. Ya mind?”

“Alright,” Joel’s voice made me turn my head toward the porch. He wandered over toward us with a clipboard looking very camp-official with a pair of khaki shorts and a white t-shirt with Crystal Lake written in red, varsity lettering across the chest. “Let me get you your assignments here. We have to get this place in shape.”

“Yes, coach,” Ted teased, making everyone chuckle.

Joel smirked but went on. “So, I think from your personalities and your experience in jobs like this that you’ll enjoy yourselves this summer; but like I said, once the campers come you have to be on your game. Pay attention to whoever is in your group, take head counts, you know the deal. You’ve done this before. I’ll give you all that protocol closer to when the kids arrive in a few weeks.”

He began to read off the clipboard. “I paired you off and I have a little map to give each group so you know where you’re going for your jobs.”

I secretly hoped Joel would want to work with me, but that hope quickly diminished; however, I was happy to hear that I was going to be working with Sandra.

“(Y/N), Sandra,” he motioned to the two of us, “Today you’re both going to sand and paint the lifeguard stand. I have some extra supplies if you don’t mind making a sign that says, No Swimming When Lifeguard Is Not On Duty.”

I nodded, smiling as I did and Sandra gave him a two-finger salute.

“Mark and Scott, I put you in charge of the game room. I’ll give you the rundown of what I need from you there. Right outside of the game room we have to set up the archery range, too.” The wavy haired guy leaned over and gave Mark a fist bump.

“Ted and Jeff,”

“We’re the muscle, I know,” Jeff joked.

“Actually,” Joel gave a laugh, “You two are going to help me assemble the docks down at the beach. So, yeah, I hope you don’t mind a little physical exertion.”

Ted flexed his Gumby-like arms, “I’m here for ya boss.”

“Annie’s going to be in the kitchen and mess hall area getting things set up how she’d like. Tomorrow we’ll probably all be on painting jobs around the cabins to get this place looking a little more inviting. Make sure you’re all drinking plenty of water, it’s supposed to be hot today.”

The short meeting concluded and we went to retrieve a few papers from Joel. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a key, placing it in my palm.

“There’s a small shed down by the beach,” he informed me, “All the sanding and painting supplies are in there. I’m going to get the guys settled in the game room and then I’ll be down to help out Jeff and Ted with the docks, so if you need anything, I’ll be back in about fifteen minutes.”

I nodded, “Okay. Thanks.” I turned to Sandra, Jeff and Ted and the four of us made our way down to the beach together.

“I hope this is an excuse to get in the water,” Jeff said, wiping sweat from his forehead, “I’m already sweating.”

“We have to take a dip when we’re done,” Sandra said, looking at me.

I nodded. “I’m in.”

The two of us made our way up just a few feet into the trees at the top of the beach while the guys made their way toward the water. A green shed was tucked in between two giant pine trees, and Sandra took the key from me to open the door.

“Think he did that on purpose?” she asked, smirking as she looked back at me.

“Who?”

“Joel.” She flung the door open.

“Did what on purpose?” I followed her into the shed and a wave of heat him me.

“Put us all in the same area,” Sandra explained, “Particularly you.. and him.” She added, “Damn, it’s hot in here.”

I snickered and looked down, shaking my head.

“He’s got a thing for you.”

“No, he doesn’t.” I giggled again.

“He’s hot,” Sandra went on, in no rush to reach for the paint. “I wonder what it would be like to be with an older man.”

I smirked, caving in to the girl talk. “I wonder, too.” We both shared a laugh and she playfully shoved my shoulder.

“The second it happens, I want details.”

“Nothing is going to happen,” I insisted, toying with my ponytail.

“Would you? You know.. if he asked?”

I opened my mouth to speak and then thought for a second, leaving us in another chorus of laughter. “Who knows,” was my final answer. I kept it purposely vague, but it certainly wasn’t a ‘no’.

We finally retrieved the sanding supplies and two buckets of white paint. The fresh air just a step out of the shed made me sigh. 

“It was really hot in there,” I said aloud to no one in particular as we made the short walk through the sand to the lifeguard stand.

Ted blew his whistle again, making us both snap our heads down toward the water. “That’s my stand, girls. Make sure you wax on and wax off correctly. I don’t want any slivers in my hiney.”

The two of us began to laugh at his choice of words.

“I’m leaving the top where you sit extra splintery!” Sandra called back, making him blow his whistle again.

I laughed at their interaction and soon after began to tackle the job at hand.

“This is the best summer job ever,” Sandra claimed, climbing up a few of the wood steps to sand the seat.

“Yeah, it seems like it’s going to be.” I removed my shoes and kicked them to the side before squatting down to get the base. We worked for a few uninterrupted minutes before I turned to say something else to Sandra. She had her neck arched, looking out past the shed into the woods.

“What is it?” I asked, glancing over my shoulder now into the trees.

Her eyes squinted and she used her hand to block the sun. “I don’t know.”

I rose to my feet now and followed her stare.

“I thought I saw someone,” she claimed.

“Hopefully it’s not Crazy Ralph,” I said back, making her chuckle and finally look down.

Sandra gave a wave now in the opposite direction we had been looking and wiggled her eyebrows at me. “Hi, Joel.”

I caught my breath and turned, trying not to drink him in as he marched in our direction.

“You two all set?” He asked.

I nodded and Sandra saluted him again. “I think so,” I told him.

“Good,” Joel tipped up the corner of his mouth in a smirk. The three of us turned toward the woods when there was a rustling sound. My gaze lingered for a moment before Joel’s laughter drew my attention back to him. “These woods will make your mind play tricks on you.” He gave a wink, and I smirked back at him. That wink made my stomach do flip-flops.

“I thought I saw something-” Sandra started, when another rustling sound made her glance back into the woods. She then quickly looked down toward the lake, where Ted and Jeff were both laughing.

Jeff launched a rock up into the trees, creating the same effect as before as it skipped through the leaves, making a rustling sound. “You girls are too easy to scare,” he claimed.

“Keep it up and it’s going to be a very cold summer for you!” Sandra shouted to him.

Everyone laughed. I admired Sandra’s go-getter personality. It was the opposite of my own, but I loved that she had a big voice and wasn’t at all shy. She definitely wore the pants in that relationship, as Jeff continued to laugh but obeyed her requests to cut the shit.

Joel shook his head with a smile. “Let me know if you need anything,” he said, glancing at Sandra first and then back to me. “Okay?”

I nodded. “Okay.”

“Okay.” He wandered down the sand and I admired watching him go.

“Tell him you need him to apply sunscreen to your shoulders,” Sandra whispered, making me laugh out loud.

“Stop it,” I whispered back, dabbing her arm with a streak of white paint.

Sandra’s jaw dropped but she immediately began to laugh and did it back until the two of us were standing there with our paintbrushes in a stalemate, staring at one another. “Truce.”

“Okay, truce.” I went to shake her hand and Sandra playfully streaked my other arm, sending us into a chorus of laughter again.

“Okay, okay.” She put her hands up and when I saw her glance out into the woods again, I couldn’t help but feel uneasy. “You don’t think Ralph would be watching us or anything, do you?”

I peered through the trees. “I doubt it. He’s got to be long gone by now. If we see him, we’ll report it.”

Sandra continued to stare for a second and then her carefree demeanor resumed. The remainder of the afternoon went a little something like that. It felt like we were being paid to have fun. I decided, for the final summer before I was ousted into the “real world”, it was going to be the best one.

CLICK HERE FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER

@gissellec1 @cattt777 @mellymbee @armybts20137@bbiophiliaa @littleblackcatinwonderland @mermaidgirl30 @brittmb115 @yellowjacketsbuzzbuzz @beltzboys2015-blog @lwfics @pedropascal111

[rozeliyawashereyall]

Part 2 of Korey because why not :3 + some doodles at the end of the rant!

Bisexual? Bisexual.

In the first post about Korey, I said she became a hunter because of a deal she made.. and that deal was originally a bet she made with one of the more experienced hunters under Circe. Korey ended up losing, and as punishment, she became a hunter. She was maybe 16 or 17 at the time

Pretty good at fighting! Very fast reflexes. Her attacks start out slow to give the one she's attacking a false sense of security before speeding up without warning if that makes any sense

Play fights with Raine and Amber :3 they're supposed to be training, but shh (@willowve01 and @astralbulldragon13 )

While very much reckless and careless of her self-preservation. She always makes sure the others are taking care of themselves. She knows not everyone can keep up with her energy.

Has accidentally killed 2 people before, in her defense, they started the fight.

Really wanted to learn magic as a kid, kinda grew out of it, though she does think about learning it every once in a while. Esther taught her a few simple spells :D (@asmrbrainrot)

One of the reasons she wanted to learn magic is because her older brother Esra learned it, his affinities are crystal and light, often showing off his magic for his little sister

While yes, most of her scars are because of her thril seeking behavior, a few of them are from her hunts.

Doesn't really agree with the whole enslaving half bloods thing..though she does agree that some do need to be on some kind of watch by the hunters from how violent they can be, but never hurt let alone drugged.

Had no idea what melacide (idk how to spell it T_T) even was until she got to the arena with Bodie

She tries to help her younger brother, Noah, to go down the right path and not end up a complete mess like her but end up like their older brother Esra

Barely ever at her house, she actually spends most of her time at her friends' homes

Does sometimes accidentally refer to themselves as a boy out of habit, does not like it one bit.

Terrible sense of direction, like Jesus christ, please get this girl a map. They could be going to the store that's only a few steps far, and she'd somehow STILL get lost

Please, PLEASE give this girl validation. She may act like it doesn't affect her but deep inside she's overthinking and freaking out she did something wrong, neglect will do that to ya :(

Her scrapbook was a gift from her grandparents for her 14th birthday!

Actually had a little crush on sparky when she first became a hunter, she's over it now tho (or is she? Jk jk...unless?)

Before becoming a hunter, she worked at a bar with her childhood friend, Jay :D!

Always wear gloves because her dumbass put a boiling pot of oil under water and burned her hand.

If you think her sense of direction is bad, just you want till you see her cooking skills, the number of times she's burned water is concerning.

Has occasional dance classes with Reya and Melody :D! (@iistxrmyskyii and @kaiamtt)

The bugs use her as a fireplace when it's too cold from how warm she is /hj

Felix is the only guy lol (@insignificant-anarchy) (only for now dw)

[ashs-random-writing]

Giants in the woods

One-shot

Ao3

Christmas gift for my amazing qpp @a-chilly-pepper

—

When Patton was enveloped with magic, and ended up in a strange land where fairies were to scale to everything else, and he was a giant, he’d not known what to expect

When Virgil found a giant in the woods, he couldn’t help noticing how much it resembled different aspects of nature

—

There was something about the darkness, Patton thought to himself, as he closed his eyes. Something different, that was drawing him in. It was warm, and inviting, and he had never felt like this before.

He woke up a little while later, somewhere new. There were trees around him, but it was as though they had been shrunk. Unlike most trees that looked like that, with that many branches, and that thick, they were only about a foot taller than him. He adjusted his glasses nervously.

He was stood up for some reason when he woke up

There were several bushes around him, though they were also strangely small. The only thing he could see was more trees, more bushes and more plants. If he looked up, he could see a night sky that was entirely unfamiliar to him.

Those… those weren’t the constellations that he saw every night, weren’t the ones that Logan had mapped out and explained to him about a thousand times. He wrapped his arms around himself, in a parody of a hug

He didn’t know where he was, nor did he know why. He knew that he didn’t know what was going on, that it was an unfamiliar situation.

He reminded himself that he needed to think positively- new and unfamiliar, didn’t mean bad. He was supposed to be an optimist, and he supposed that the sky was pretty here.

He sat down on the ground, careful to not crush any plants or animals. He couldn’t hear anything but the chirping and squawks of nighttime birds, but they sounded… smaller.

He tried to ignore everything that was different, wrong, and strange; this… this could very clearly be a fun experience, if he was positive about it!

He was a giant here. It didn’t really take a genius to figure out. He wiped his eyes of the tears he had only just realised he had been crying.

He wondered if there were other people here. Would they be tiny as well, or would they be like him? He wondered how they’d feel about him.

Hopefully, good feelings.

He wondered how Logan was faring with his absence. Logan was there when he… disappeared, wasn’t he?

When the strange feeling had encompassed him, Logan was there as well, right? He nodded to himself.

Yeah, he was there, they were watching one of Logan’s smarty-pants documentaries after Patton had shown him one of the animated movies that Patton liked. It was how they liked to hang out, showing each other their interests and listening and watching intently to the other

Their interests didn’t often coincide, but neither of them minded. Patton hugged his knees.

What if they never got to do that together again? No, he was going to go back home. He had to think positive.

For the next few days, Patton was living in the woods. He had found some plants that he knew were safe to eat, and he ate those, not being able to look an animal in the eye and kill it, even for food.

He hadn’t seen any people. He didn’t want to seek them out, either. He didn’t want to get more lost

He knew his little stretch of trees, and the few little bushes that had surrounded him the past few days.

Some of the plants glowed every so often, and it was mesmerising. He didn’t touch them that often, knowing that it could be dangerous. He looked up at the stars at night

“Would Logan like this new sky?” He’d mumble to himself, and hug his knees.

He needed water. He was sure there was a river nearby, but he didn’t know if the water was clean or if there was enough.

He gave in, and walked as quietly as he could to not disturb the wildlife. He found the river soon enough. It was crystal clear. He breathed deeply and he cupped some water in his hand and he drank.

It helped his lightheadedness and his sore throat.

He carried on drinking and then went back to the small section of the woods where he had been staying.

It was just like camping, he decided. There was nothing wrong with it.

He stayed there and fell asleep.

The next few days were similar. He hadn’t seen any people.

He was lonely. He wondered what Logan had been doing. He closed his eyes and laid down. The ground wasn’t the most comfortable, but it was bearable.

He woke up a few hours later, and yawned, rubbing his eyes. He sat up, and then he noticed he wasn’t alone. There was a (person? Fairy?) in front of him, to scale with everything else around him, making them as small as a doll to him.

He blinked in surprise, hand twitching slightly as though to grab them, but he stopped himself

“H-hello?” He asked, almost nervously.

They had dark purple skin, and hair that covered part of their face, meaning he could only see one obscenely wide eye. Their clothes were strange. All dark colours and purples. They were lanky in the way only a teenager could manage

They looked… scared. Of him.

He brought his hands closer to his own body. He’d probably also be scared if faced with a giant. Their eye was a mint green, and swirling with yellows, looking at his body, his hands, and his face, interchangeably.

“It’s okay, I’m not gonna hurt you,” he said as softly as he could manage, but their face stayed blank, terrified, shocked

“You… you don’t understand me, do you?” He tried about ten seconds later, voice dejected

They stared up at him. Patton felt awkward, upset and embarrassed.

Of course they wouldn’t understand him, what was he thinking? This place was so far from home that there was a different sky, why would they speak English?

The little person stared at his face as though they were studying it, before carefully backing away, never looking away from him, as though scared he’d pounce

He realised belatedly that the plants were glowing more with proximity to the tiny person.

They slowly dimmed.

He could admit that he was a little bit upset with the departure of the tiny person. He stared at where they had left, and he hugged his knees.

He missed home. He missed Logan.

The tiny person was about 4 inches tall, to him. How tall would Patton be for them? It probably wasn’t fair that he called them the ‘tiny person’; they were to scale, he was the one that was big.

He spent the next few days trying not to think about the things he might be missing at home, good or bad. He hoped that Logan wasn’t too worried about him, he was fine, even if he had no clue how to get home.

He wiped his eyes and rested his chin on his hand. He didn’t know what he was going to do

The tiny person, extremely surprisingly, came back.

They had a long cloak, a dark one, that looked like the sparkling night sky. He was mesmerised by it. So much so that he almost missed that it looked so much more like his night sky than it did theirs.

He stared at it, feeling tears well up in his eyes. He missed his sky.

The tiny person stared up at him, clearly taken aback by his sudden emotion.

“S-sorry… just miss home,” he apologised between tears, though he knew they couldn’t understand him.

They walked a little closer, staring up at him, before removing their cloak and setting it before him like a gift.

He slowly reached out a hand, watching their reaction intently. They were watching him back.

He gently picked up the cloak, and he looked at the patterns on it with wonder.

He could see his favourite constellation. He smiled, tears still falling.

The different constellations weren’t where they should be, but it was his sky, his constellations. That people knew his sky, it gave him hope of getting home.

He hugged it close and looked down at the tiny person.

They were still watching him, face unreadable. He offered their cloak back to them, which they hesitantly accepted, wrapping it back around their shoulders. They stared at him, before clearing their throat

They started speaking, but Patton couldn’t understand a single word they said. Their voice was somewhat high pitched, with a language that sounded like chittering and clicks. He frowned

“I don’t… I don’t know what you’re saying,” he tried, but they clearly also didn’t understand him.

He wondered about this place. Why was he here, where was here, why were the people tiny and colourful, why was he a giant?

The tiny person slowed down their speaking, and took a deep breath, before gesturing to themself and saying something. Probably their name. He repeated it as best he could, and watched their reaction.

They corrected him on pronunciation, and he repeated the corrected version again. They nodded slowly. Patton grinned, clapping his hands very lightly

He gestured to himself and said his own name, the same way they had said theirs.

They repeated it. Of course, considering their vocal cords seemed different to his, they didn’t get it entirely correct, but he didn’t have the energy to correct them.

He just grinned, undeniably happy. He clapped again, careful not to make too much noise. Tiny ears were bound to be more sensitive.

He saw their wary smile, but they still didn’t get close to him. Like a particularly nervous kitten, he likened them to mentally, smile growing at that comparison.

Maybe he could name a cat after them when he got home.

He leant down

“We’re friends, now, Virgil!” He announced quietly, still knowing that they couldn’t understand him, but wanting to share that fact anyway.

They looked at him with wide eyes (or, eye, since he could still only see one) and muttered something, presumably to themself. Patton leant back, and looked at the sky. The sun would be setting soon.

Virgil followed his gaze and frowned.

Patton watched as they left with a feeling of sadness growing. He had just made his first friend in this new place, and now they were leaving

He watched them pull the hood of their cloak up as their small figure left his sight

—

Virgil had seen the biggest shock, and incidentally one of the biggest things, of his life. He had just gone for a morning walk in the extensive woods at the border of his village

And then, he’d stumbled upon the sleeping giant. Its skin was the colour of sand, its hair the colour of the very earth beneath his feet, the colour of the dirt that made up the homes of countless animals and other creatures.

In addition to its sheer size, it was clearly powerful. It looked like Nature Herself had carved it out of Her image. It awoke, after a few minutes of Virgil staring at it.

Virgil could feel his heart racing, as it sat up. If Virgil thought it was large when it was on the ground, it was even larger now it was sat up. He took a wary step backward, and watched its eyes move to stare back at him.

Shit, it had noticed him

He looked at its eyes, the colour of the grass beneath his feet, but swirling with browns and golds also, as though they were stolen from the sunlight hitting the trees.

He felt his chest rising and falling in response to his panicked breathing.

That was some kind of nature deity, or at least something 10x more powerful than Virgil could ever hope to be, and suddenly it spoke

Not in any language that Virgil could understand, but rather something that was deep, rumbling and similar in pitch to a rockslide. He stared in shock, not comprehending the words, or the language.

Its facial expression changed to something almost disappointed, but it spoke again.

Virgil thought for a moment. He’d come back at some point, but he felt the need to leave now. He carefully backed away, not taking his eyes off of them, in case it was taken as some kind of disrespect.

He walked back to his house, and picked up his books. He had always been fascinated by the idea of the supposed alternative world of everything natural, with no magic, but he’d thought it was just that; an idea.

This seemed to prove otherwise. He spent the next few days reading, and contemplating. He hadn’t spoken to his friends in a few days.

He had known that the theorised alternate world was supposed to have different stars, it had been one of his favourite things to think about for a while

He had made a cloak embroidered with the depictions of what these stars might look like. He hadn’t thought about it in a while

He looked at it in thought, before pulling it around his shoulders and walking towards the trees. Perhaps the giant would appreciate it, a kind of… offering.

When he got there this time, it was awake, and noticed his arrival near immediately, staring not so much at him, but at his cloak, eyes going wide before beginning to fall with tears.

He stared. Its tears were clear, unlike fellow fairies, who cried pure black. His confusion took on a kind of horror as he realised that it was salt water.

As a fairy, salt was painful, a kind of torture, unless naturally part of a substance like the ocean, rather than artificially added. That the few stray splashes weren’t painful was only a small blessing

It only seemed to prove that it was even more powerful than originally assumed. The ocean’s own waters fell from its eyes.

It said something in that strange language, its deep voice rattling him, and he took a deep breath.

His cloak was removed from his shoulders, and carefully laid flat in front of the giant, which tilted its head

Virgil took a small step back, and it slowly and carefully picked the cloak up between two large fingers, looking at it with a smile, and still having tears running down its face.

It held the fabric close for several long moments, before looking back down at him, and carefully putting it back down like he had done to gift it to it.

He weighed his options for a single moment, before slowly pulling the cloak back around his shoulders.

“Your generosity to give me the cloak back is greatly appreciated, giant,” he said politely, on the small chance it could understand him.

It stared at him with non-comprehension, before slowly speaking in its own language.

Virgil stared back again, thinking of a way to communicate.

He took a deep breath, and placed a hand on his chest. A name would be as good as any place to start

“Virgil,” he enunciated carefully, watching it slowly nod

“Virkil?” It parroted, getting it wrong. Its vocal cords weren’t meant for this

“No, it’s Virgil,” he corrected gently, ignoring the annoyance that was creeping up in his mind

“Vir-gil,” it parroted happily, clapping, before placing its hand on its own giant chest

He mimicked their own, strange name, trying to make it sound like their language, but he was sure he messed up somehow. It still grinned, and clapped again

Virgil was happy that it seemed like an excitable creature, rather than a vengeful, easy to anger one.

He smiled a bit, but shuffled backwards a tiny amount. It was so… big.

It leant down, its giant face now only a few feet above him

It said something that ended in his name, but Virgil couldn’t figure out the sentence

“Oh, what have I gotten myself into?” He muttered nervously, fidgeting. It leant back, and started looking at the sky.

Virgil also looked up. It was starting to get dark, he’d have to go if he wanted to see the path home.

Of course, there were the glow plants, and they never really stopped glowing, but they were few and far between, except in this little clearing where his nature giant had spawned

He slowly backed away, and once he was far enough, he flicked his hood up and turned around to see where he was going. He could almost feel its watchful eyes on him, though they were partially obscured by the lenses that covered them.

Once he got home, he slumped against the door. That was one of the most stressful interactions he’d had in his life, and that was saying something. He should probably tell his friends about the (giant? deity?) in the woods.

They’d probably want to know about that.

He felt his breathing speed up ever so slightly. He didn’t even know what was happening, let alone how he’d explain it to his friends.

What would Roman say? He would probably not believe him, but he wouldn’t lie about something like this.

There was something powerful in the woods. He could only imagine what could’ve happened if it wasn’t as benevolent as it seemed. He wrung his hands

He magicked a book closer. What did it say about giants? Why was it just always in the woods, why was it so happy when they exchanged names, what was it?

It mentioned nothing. Just stories of people who somehow ended up in the other dimension, where these deities had somehow harnessed the power of lightning for everyday use, without magic.

If Virgil had doubted the power of this giant (he hadn’t, but), he certainly wasn’t now. He read up until the sun rose, at which point he left his house, and traversed towards Roman’s home.

Compared to Roman’s house, Virgil lived in basically a shed. Roman’s house, still wouldn’t be big enough to house ‘Patton’, even with all the walls cleared out.

He knocked on the door, and waited to either be let in, or for Roman to come out.

Roman opened the door, and Virgil quickly grabbed his arm, and pulled him outside

He stammered a little bit, trying to figure out exactly how to explain this

“Listen, you know how I sorta obsessed over the idea of a complete alternative world last month,” he asked, fidgeting and avoiding eye contact

He saw Roman nod, and he carried on

“I- I might have found proof that it exists, and that everything is giant there. Also, maybe there’s a deity in the woods, and you should follow me, because I know it’s hard to believe, but it is there,” he said, rambling in a way that probably wasn’t as convincing as it could’ve been

He looked up and studied Roman’s face

“Okay, well, I only caught about half of that, what do you mean there might be a deity in the woods?” Roman asked, wide eyed

Virgil took a moment to think rationally and explain

“There is something in the woods. It’s giant, it embodies nature as far as I can tell, and it cries saltwater. Like actual, natural saltwater,” he explained, watching Roman’s eyes widen more

They spoke for a few more minutes, with Virgil trying to convince Roman to believe him, and Roman trying to counter his claims

“Okay! I know this sounds insane, but I’ve seen it, and I need you to believe me! Just- just follow me, and I’ll bring you to it,” he pleaded

Roman finally conceded, and Virgil started dragging him towards Patton’s clearing.

He explained the small things he had learnt about the giant, that it didn’t know any language he had ever heard of, that it seemed intensely linked with nature, that it seemed like it was kind, easily excitable.

Roman trailed slightly behind him, evidently still not believing him too much

“And… how big did you say this thing was?”

“Well, let’s say that you’d probably be the size of a finger to it,” Virgil replied, noting that they were getting closer

He stopped

“Just saying, it might be asleep for a little while at this time of day,” he admitted

It was, the last time he’d shown up at this time. They got to the clearing soon enough, and he felt Roman grab his hand.

Patton was sleeping, large face pressed into the ground.

Roman stammered next to Virgil, staring at the giant

Suddenly a sound akin to a whimper left the giant’s mouth, and soon, Virgil had been grabbed by Patton, who was still sleeping.

Virgil didn’t enjoy being grabbed, or being held by a hand that was larger than him, but he couldn’t get out. Roman was staring wordlessly at him.

Virgil could feel the heartbeat of the giant, for the next five minutes, while he was held like some kind of comfort object. He was trying to suppress his panic attack.

There was a shift in movement, and Patton woke up, immediately letting him go, and shuffling backwards slightly, beginning to ramble in their strange language

—

Patton had been upset when his new friend, Virgil, had left. But then he’d fallen asleep, so it didn’t matter really.

His dream was upsetting. He had fallen asleep thinking about friends, and therefore thinking about Logan. He had seen Logan in his dream, and Logan had been glad he was gone, glad to get rid of him.

Patton knew logically that Logan was his friend, and that he probably wouldn’t be glad of his disappearance, but that was also a distressing thought. He didn’t want to make Logan upset, either.

It was a very upsetting situation. When he’d woken up, he’d noticed that he was holding something.

He looked down, finding that he was holding Virgil close to his chest, like he did with his stuffed animals when he’d had a nightmare at home. He’d hastily let go of them and started apologising profusely, finding them staring at him with those wide eyes.

He noticed as well that they had brought a friend with them this time. Oh, what a bad first impression he’d made…

His apology faded out as he stared at the new arrival.

They had curlier hair than Virgil, and a different colour scheme. Darker green eyes, of which he could see both, and a pinkish-red skin, and blood red hair. Their clothes were fancier than Virgil’s, and they were red and gold.

He looked between them and rested his chin on his knees, feeling very guilty.

They looked at each other, speaking in hushed voices as though they were scared he’d suddenly be able to understand them. Soon, Virgil’s friend stepped forward, and introduced themself the way Virgil had

He repeated the name, nodding to himself, and then he introduced himself as well, watching them repeat it too, having similar trouble as Virgil with pronunciation. He smiled.

For the next few months, he stayed in those woods, visited every other day by Virgil, or Roman, or both. They were teaching him their language, but it was slow going.

Patton wasn’t very good at this kind of thing. They seemed to be somewhat nervous to be around him. At first he had chalked it up to his height compared to theirs, but he’d started to notice that it was something else.

He couldn’t puzzle out what.

It was on one of these visitations that he heard a noise. He strained his ears to hear it again. It almost sounded like…

“Patton!”

Patton’s eyes widened. He knew that voice

He shot up, into a standing position, something he never did when he was with his little friends. They got nervous easily

He called back

“Logan?”

Logan was here, how was Logan here? He started running towards the voice, and barrelled into Logan’s arms

“I- I missed you,” he said quietly.

Logan returned the hug, just as tight as Patton had started it, and Patton felt his eyes burning with tears

“Let’s go home,” Logan whispered, voice on the edge of cracking.

And, they found their way back home, something Patton had been worried about for a long few months.

—

@a-chilly-pepper @da3dm

[bizarre-blorbo-bracket]

Round 1 Poll 28: the Concorde from Aérospatiale/BAC vs Gnash from Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles Ring of Fates

Propaganda under the cut:

The Concorde

It's a plane. The BEST plane. It has a moving nose, so sometimes it's got a drooping snout. It's one of the only supersonic commercial planes out there (there is only 1 other!) and can cruise at MACH 2! It's a thing of beauty, if I was rich I would love to be on one. Honestly, if it wasn't retired, I'd love to watch one take off.

Gnash

MY FERRAL AUTISM BOY!!! He talks to animals! I wanna squeeze him! I wanna use his double jump to sequence break and attempt to jump out of the map! He's cute and I used to kinda have a crush* on him (when I was 12. fuck that's 10 years ago shit fuck i'm old now) and if fictional characters aged with the passage of time I still would have a crush* on him now. He's still my cute scrunkly with sequence break potential and I have a crush* on an imaginary idea of what Gnash would be like as an adult because he kickstarted my love of fictional androgynous guys, and some of my FNAF AU/OC characters share some of his traits. *FYI I only have a vague idea of what a crush is. It's someone you find BOTH aesthetically cute AND you think you'd have a nice relationship with them, right? And people can pick their crushes, right? You think "hu, that fictional character is cute and a relationship with them may be sweet" and then you go through the "do I want to have a crush on this character" and if you select yes, that's getting a crush works, right? (Gnash will always tick the cute box but the latter box wouldn't work unless I was magically 15 again)

[lavalampstealer]

hello.

tell me about yellow and cyan please.

i am obsessed with your things

YAAAAAYYYY I GET TO DUMP ABOUT THESE IDIOTS!!!!!!!

game spoilers ahead, obv

They gave each other their nicknames, Cyan getting theirs first from the fact that they’re almost always wearing blues while nearly every other EOD field agent lean towards reds and oranges, and Yellow getting his from his love for the color (yellow sweaters and the like fill his wardrobe, his signature headset is yellow, he loves marigolds, daffodils, sunflowers, etc).

Whenever they’re next to each other and Cyan starts getting anxious or starts to spiral, they grab onto Yellow’s sleeve or the hem of his sweater or something to let him know ‘Hey I’m not doing okay.’

Cyan’s flowers are blue salvias and blue irises (thank god I was able to find blue flowers with meanings) and Yellow’s are daffodils and sunflowers. (flowernerdflowernerdflowe-)

Cyan’s shirts are almost always wrinkled (Yellow gave up trying to convince them to iron their shirts, they’d just shrug it off and say that they usually ruin them on missions anyways so what’s the point).

Cyan is a chronic tinkerer. Before the Agency, they worked as a car mechanic, and they can’t keep their hands off of things. They want to know how a thing works, what it’s made of, how it was made, etc. They absolutely adored having Friendly Skies as their first real mission, they spent so long looking around in every nook and cranny of Zor’s car. Anything with buttons and switches and plugs has them like a moth to a sparkler. The anti-grav machine in Winter Break? You’re telling them they could fiddle with sliders AND pretty crystals?? Some other ones they wanted to figure out: the chair in Seat of Power, the panels in Jet Set, Fabricator’s desk in Eaves Drop, and the map and hidden cabinet in Party Crasher. I could go on about how they were practically VIBRATING when they saw Robutler in House Call, but then this would turn into a whole essay lol. When they got their leg, Yellow had to stop them from disassembling the thing because they were fascinated by it.

Also adding to the above, even though Prism designed their prostheses, they hardly met her. Granted, most of the time when she was there it was to take their measurements and they were most likely unconscious.

Cyan looked up to Prism in some respects, they knew that she was an amazing engineer and were really impressed with her work, so they were crushed when they got to meet her properly in ieytd 3 and it turned out that she hated them. Their heart nearly exploded when she called Phoenix her greatest creation in KBOOM (that or the traces of kinesium in their bloodstream wasn’t doing so hot near the lava and destabilizing core).

Oh also, Cyan has a tiny amount of kinesium in their blood from the implant. After Death Engine, the explosion from the gravity crystal messed with their TK a bit, destabilizing it ever so slightly. The main side effects were occasional headaches and their eyes let off a faint glow when they used their telekinesis in any way. They never figured this out themselves, poor Yellow was the one to discover this. They were both in a pitch black room and Cyan, thinking he knew they were there, came up from behind Yellow and used their TK to search for a light switch, scaring the shit out of him Freddy Fazbear style.

Cyan has anxiety and picks at the skin around their nails. Yes I’m projecting and no they can’t break the habit.

Cyan only wears their gloves during mission because it’s required by the Agency (something about not leaving fingerprints behind). They despise the feeling of any gloves but they found some bearable ones that they can deal with.

Yellow is pretty much blind without his glasses.

Yellow has a scar on the back of his neck, but Cyan (or anyone for that matter) hardly ever see it because he’s almost always in a turtleneck of some kind. Cyan only knows about it because Yellow told him the story about how he got it when they were bored in between missions.

Yellow went from handling 3-5 agents at a time to having 1-2, mainly because Cyan/Phoenix was being put on more assignments due to their success rate, but also because he stopped taking on as many because he was starting to become attached. To him, they were just more nameless Agents that got caught in Zoraxis’ traps and after bonding with Cyan, he couldn’t stand to listen as agent after agent was put out of commission.

Yellow really likes his headset and is hardly ever seen without it on. It’s comfortable, it dampens harsh noises, and he can hear people just fine with them on. When he’s not using it to talk to an agent, the mic is pulled aside and they’re switched off.

Cyan also likes headphones, although they prefer in-ear ones. When they’re not on missions, they usually have an earbud in playing some kind of music, like Frank Sinatra or some big band songs as background noise.

If they had access to modern music. they would both listen to Womanizer. and they’d both be girlbosses. Neither would tell the other about this.

Cyan loves any kind of animal, cats and reptiles especially. Yellow says he doesn’t like many animals, but he would absolutely melt if a cat jumped up on his lap.

Cyan very much has orange cat energy. Dumb. Dumb agent. Little braincells. /aff

[hawkepockets]

previously on: pepa posting

it’s 1308. by mapping underground optic cables using a lens apparatus based on the VOED, and thanks to a lucky stumble upon a natural shaft in the ground, pepa has discovered an abandoned ancient rata, “rata x,” located not far from rata sum. the arcane council refused to fund an expedition to explore and loot the rata, fearing any disturbance could wake destroyers or cause sinkholes, and the priory respected this decision. so pepa signed on with an inquest archaeology krewe, and undertook the rata x-pedition illegally.

the mood of the krewe was twitchy. the city was partially flooded and entirely unsound. and while pepa was fascinated by the dropped toys, broken-down appliances, and household items left behind by the fleeing inhabitants, the inquest had no interest in sentimental junk. they were nervous about destroyers, tunnel collapses, pitfalls, the inscrutable dark water, and the ancient security systems that might putter back to life just long enough to kill them, and they quickly developed a suspicion amongst themselves that pepa knew about some real treasure down here, and was holding out on them.

which was true! the magnified VOED lens had picked up a faint but still active energy signature in the heart of rata x. based on her observations of rata x’s layout and the modern statics library, pepa made an educated guess that this signature came from the data core crystal of the city library’s computer base, containing all the stored knowledge of this rata. it would be worth a fortune to the right museum head, researcher, or antiquities collector. and pepa didn’t want the inquest to touch it.

the closer the team got to the library, the more they noticed soft scuttling and magma glow in their periphery. there were destroyers down here—just the tiny melter crabs, for now, but in increasing density.

the krewe scaled a wall and picked their way over rooftops & improvised bridges to the roof of the library, where kaskk used a nifty little inquest laser to cut a new skylight where pepa indicated, and pepa was nominated to rappel down & in.

she slid down kaskk’s rope, into the center of the library, which was encrusted with sleeping destroyers like barnacles on every surface. picked her way around them looking for a data crystal, FOUND IT! had to cover her mouth to keep from squeaking EUREKA!!! pumped her fist did a little stompy dance and pocketed it. and heard the rope slap onto the floor behind her as kaskk let go of the other end.

something must have……. happened up there!

slinking for her life, pepa made it all the way to the front door of the library, which slid open on the loudest, screechiest, last-oiled-250-years-ago track—and the destroyers didn’t move. then, a tinny speaker chimed and said “thanks for learning with us,” and a thousand fiery eyes opened to look at pepa.

the inquest krewe was waiting outside the doors to jump pepa, but took their cue to run when she fucking booked it, triggering the ancient defenses as she ran.

behind her, the library wall caved outward like a breached dam, and destroyers flooded the rata’s walkways. several inquest krewe members were pulled under, trampled and burned in the first few seconds. their single heavy fighter, armed with a flamethrower, turned to face the destroyers, who just swam right through their gouts of artificial fire, fell upon the heavy and tore them to shreds. pepa saw that. most of the others made a last-ditch effort to blast open a new exit to the surface, and brought part of the cavern ceiling down on themselves—crushing a lot of the destroyer swarm, to pepa’s benefit.

the end of his braid smoking, his heels and calves sliced and singed by nipping destroyers, and still holding the data crystal, pepa reached the bottom of the small shaft he’d come in through when he first found the rata, gulped the fresh air, and braced his hands on the sides of the shaft, ready to scrabble his way back up like a mole—

and got stabbed in the back. literally. the inquest krewe leader, kaskk, pulled her knife out of pepa, shoved her down, and stepped on her back to help herself up the shaft. pepa might have been able to follow her up before the destroyers swarmed their position, so they could both survive to settle their differences topside, but she was filled with such fierce and sudden hatred that instead she bucked and squirmed around until her teeth could meet in kaskk’s leg. she bit and tore until the other asura fell on top of her, they rolled a few times, and then pepa kicked kaskk down the slope into the onrush of destroyers. she saw kaskk’s face as she died: an expression of hurt surprise, as if they’d been dear friends, instead of enemies who briefly collaborated, giving each other shifty looks the whole time, then wrestled for the right to feed the other to destroyers.

it confused pepa, and never really left him.

he got out, though climbing the shaft with his back ripped open was agony, then in a frenzy kicked rocks and dirt down the mouth of the shaft, tore down brush and saplings to plug the hole (a feeble stopgap against destroyers, if they'd been intelligent enough to take an interest in the shaft, but they were not), and finally, smashed his VOED lens apparatus and jammed the parts into the ground there, twisted antennae and sharp claws of metal signalling “danger” to any passing explorers. he realized he was weeping crazily and tried to wipe the tears away, smearing blood and jungle mud across his face.

and that’s how she went back to rata sum. straight to her rented lab space, to pack what little she kept there and take the closest waypoint to refuge peak. she had already traded the data core to gixx in exchange for novice status and sanctuary in the priory before the arcane eye—or the inquest—noticed anyone had disappeared, or that pepa had acted against the council’s ruling.

and again, by asuran standards, the x-pedition was considered a mixed success. some loss of assistant life, but the objective was met. not an atypical job for the inquest, except for how flagrantly they'd crossed the arcane council. and the data crystal was everything pepa had hoped. pepa even mentioned rata x when trahearne asked, while scouting her for pact commander, whether she had any prior leadership experience.

but pepa knew it was a nightmarish failure, in her gut. she shouldn’t have worked with the inquest at all, and once she had committed herself to it, she should have put some value on their lives.

when trahearne looked into the details of the rata x incident, following “shell shock,” he was appalled. and his horror cracked their friendship apart forever.

[tokinanpa]

(map is The Big Reveal)

this map reallly just throws you right into the deep end, doesn't it. zero difficulty curve.

Modded Mechanics:

those black crystals let you dash through solid ground as if it was a dream block. useful for not getting crushed!

the weird heart-eye blocks extend in either direction when you dash into them.

Weird Exploits:

you can hyper out of the dream block state in the opposite direction you're moving in, which explains some of the weird trajectories I'm getting

stamina is weird. that's it

[princess-of-the-corner]

Kingdom Hearts II: Final Mix Recap: Hollow Bastion (Battle of the Thousand)

After the post-Demyx cutscene, you are taken to the pause menu.

This reveals that Goofy’s been removed from the party, and that all of the items, armor, and accessories that were equipped to “the departed party member” have been returned to your inventory.

What follows this?

A reverse boss rush of sorts in the Ravine Trail, where Sora teams up with the residents of Hollow Bastion to fight off waves of Heartless.

First up is Yuffie. She is not a party member, instead an invincible NPC who attacks with her Shurikens and Ninja skills.

When the last Heartless falls, Yuffie departs as the invisible barriers drop.

When Sora progresses to the next section of the trail, two more barriers are raised to box him in as Leon provides his aid against the Heartless. He attacks with his Gunblade, fighting more or less identically to how he did in KH1, except he pulls the trigger and activates his Gunblade’s super form IMMEDIATELY.

Further down the trail, Tifa comes to the rescue, rushing forward and taking out a couple of Heartless during the spawning animation. As the “monk” of Final Fantasy VII, she fights unarmed. One of her more powerful attacks has her throwing a punch that produces a shockwave. She can also perform sweeping kicks to hit all Heartless around her.

Once the last one falls, Sora comes close to the base of the trail, where he is once again ambushed, and Cloud comes to the rescue by diving in from above and creating a shockwave that knocks all the Heartless away.

He fights with his Composite Sword from Advent Children, but his fighting style is otherwise identical to KH1, minus anything that would require the use of his now-missing wing.

Continuing on leads to the Crystal Fissure, a small cave lined with massive, glowing crystals, where Sora finally catches up with Mickey and Donald.

“Are you okay?” the King asks as Sora pauses to catch his breath.

“Yeah, I’m fine, but…” his voice trails off.

“Oh, Goofy…” Donald mourns as he and Mickey hang their heads in sorrow.

“Hey fellas!” Goofy hollers.

“Goofy!” Sora, Donald, and Mickey call out in joy.

Goofy runs up to them.

“You know, that really hurt,” he declares as he rubs his forehead.

“Aw, Goofy!” Mickey declares as he jumps up and glomps his friend.

“Gawrsh, Yer Majesty, I get bumped on the head all the time,” Goofy reminds him.

Sora chuckles as Donald sighs.

Donald then marches right up to Goofy. As soon as Goofy puts the King down, he WHACKS the Captain of the Guard’s leg with his staff, prompting Goofy to yelp and hop around while clutching his leg.

“That hurt, too,” Goofy remarks.

“Don’t you ever do that again!” Donald shouts.

Sora lets out a sigh of relief, but the happy music fades out as he looks out the mouth of the cave, towards the Great Maw, and Villains’ Vale beyond it.

Sora receives the Cure Element, upgrading Cure into Cura.

Additionally, Goofy has rejoined the party, requiring you to re-equip all his armor, accessories, and items.

Also, you have to reassign all his AP to re-equip all his abilities, since that was ALSO dequipped for some reason!

In the Manga, Goofy’s “death” was handled differently. Instead of being merely hit in the head by a rock, he shoved King Mickey out of the way of a rockslide, and was seemingly crushed to death, only his hat left behind in the two-page spread showing everyone’s reactions.

Plus, as he didn’t JUST get a Max HP boost in the Manga, the interface didn’t spoil his survival.

Ahem, regardless, this Save Point is you LAST CHANCE to settle your affairs in Agrabah, Halloween Town, and the Pride Lands. If you’ve not handled that, do so NOW! You will thank me later!

Additionally, the Large Chests here contain a Torn Page and the Great Maw Map.

You can also talk to Mickey, Donald, and Goofy here as they’re all NPC’s.

Continuing into the Great Maw kicks off the climax of this little “episode” of Hollow Bastion’s story.

The King leads Sora, Donald, and Goofy as they charge into the Great Maw, only to find that all the Heartless are paused.

“Hey!” Goofy shouts and points to a cliff overlooking the Great Maw, where the Unknown, Xemnas, emerges from a Corridor of Darkness and lowers his hood. He reveals a face very similar to Ansem’s, just with lighter skin (in this game at least), and shorter (yet still long) and spikier hair.

“It’s the guy who’s NOT Ansem!” Donald shouts.

“You mean it’s his Nobody!” Goofy corrects.

“The Leader of Organization XIII…” Sora comments.

Realization dawns on the King’s face.

“Wait a second,” he remarks, “Now I know!”

Fade to black as the flashback begins.

“Wise Ansem,” Mickey opened, “I’m here to seek your advice.”

Ansem’s study was far neater and tidier in the past than it is in the present.

Aside from the fact that portrait on the wall was of the REAL Ansem, those broken jars all held a bunch of cartoony hearts.

Ansem himself held a stick of sea-salt ice cream while sitting at his desk.

“I’m glad we have the opportunity to speak like this, my friend,” Ansem replied, “I’m intrigued by your hypothesis… and I’m finding it difficult to stave off the urge to test it.

“Still, I’m concerned about the stability of the worlds.”

“Yep, that’s what worries me too,” King Mickey admitted.

“The doors that appeared,” Ansem remarked, “The place the Heartless seek.

“I fear my research may have brought this upon us…”

Someone knocked on the door, and the false Ansem entered and bowed respectfully.

“Master Ansem,” he opened, “Regarding the experiment I presented the other day…

“With your permission, I’d like to proceed –

“I forbid it!” Ansem shouted, “Forget this talk of doors, and the heart of all worlds. That place must not be defiled!”

“But Master Ansem!” the fake Ansem protested, “I’ve been thinking…”

Ansem shook his head.

“Xehanort…” he opened, “Those thoughts are best forgotten.”

The fake Ansem, Xehanort, clenched his fists, but quickly regained his composer and bowed before leaving.

Though not without one more grunt of frustration.

End flashback, as “Showdown at Hollow Bastion” starts playing.

“Now I remember!” the King declares as the camera zooms in on Xehanort’s Nobody, “Xehanort! Ansem’s apprentice!”

The Organization’s leader merely grins in response.

“The leader of Organization XIII is Xehanort’s Nobody!” the King declares as the camera cuts to him and SDG. He summons his Keyblade and rushes Xemnas.

“Let’s go!” Sora declares, before the Heartless army surrounds him, Donald, and Goofy.

Sora summons the Kingdom Key as Donald and Goofy brandish their own default weapons.

The camera spins around our trio and zooms out to reveal just how MANY Heartless have surrounded them.

“Move it!” Sora shouts at the Heartless.

“We can’t let Xehanort get away!” Donald declares.

“Right!”

Sora shares a glance with Donald and Goofy, and the trio takes off, each one taking on a third of the army on their own.

Welcome, to the boss battle that was at the center of this game’s marketing: The Battle of 1000 Heartless.

Here, Sora fights 1000 Heartless on his own.

While the promotional materials had 2 Behemoths and a dozen Wyverns as part of the army Sora would be fighting, here, only Armored Knights and Survey Robots are present.

As Sora is alone, he only has access to Limit Form, and the Crowd Clearing Reaction Commands these Heartless offer.

Any Heartless who isn’t currently participating in the battle will be rendered as a 2D sprite to save on space.

In spite of what the cutscene will have you believe, Sora is not locked into only using the Kingdom Key, he only wields the Kingdom Key because the cutscene was pre-rendered to avoid melting the PS2’s Kingdom Hearts II was originally made to run on.

There’s a counter in the upper right corner of the screen that tallies up how many Heartless you’ve beaten, going up by one for every Heartless that falls.

If using Limit Form, remember that it has the MP Rage Ability, so getting hurt on purpose before MP runs out and then healing back up with a Limit is an option.

Additionally, all of the Heartless have less HP and lower stats than their standard counterparts do, meaning that they’ll fall even quicker than in a normal battle while dealing less damage.

The point of this fight isn’t to be challenging, it’s to make the player feel powerful.

(Also, the music that plays here is called “Sinister Shadows”. It plays a couple more times in the game, but this is its most famous use.)

Once you’ve defeated the last one, you’ll see that there were indeed 1000 Heartless that Sora just killed.

Winning this battle earns Sora the Guard Break Ability (ground combo finisher that activates if Sora is fighting a single enemy, or by default if Explosion isn’t equipped. Sora unleashes a powerful, guard-piercing attack).

After the battle, Sora rushes through the Great Maw to reach the Dark Depths, the outcropping that’s closest to Villain’s Vale.

He poses for a moment to catch his breath.

Donald and Goofy run up behind him.

“Where’s the King?” Sora asks.

Donald and Goofy look around.

“There he is!” Donald declares as the King takes down an Armored Knight.

“C’mon!” Sora declares as the screen fades to black and the Battle of 1000 Heartless’ theme fades out.

The camera fades back into reveal Mickey confronting the Organization’s leader, who isn’t even acknowledging him.

“Your Majesty!” Donald quacks as Sora, him, and Goofy run up to the King.

Mickey turns back to the Nobody.

“Xehanort!” he shouts.

“How long has it been since I abandoned that name…” the leader of Organization XIII comments.

“Out with it, Nobody!” Sora snaps, “Where’s Kairi? Where’s Riku?”

“I know nothing of any Kairi,” the Organization’s leader answers, “As for Riku…” he finally turns to acknowledge them, “Perhaps you should ask your king.”

Sora curiously shoots a glance at the Mickey.

“Stop!” the King shouts as he charges Xehanort’s Nobody.

Xemnas disappears into a Corridor of Darkness and the King dives after him.

The Corridor closes before SDG can follow.

“He’s gone…” Sora laments, before falling to the ground.

He bangs a fist on the ground until Goofy places a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“Sora, Goofy,” Donald opens. Whatever he’s about to say next is cut off by the realization that there are no more Heartless around Villain’s Vale.

“What’s goin’ on?” Goofy questions.

“Way to fall right into their trap,” Axel answers.

SDG run up to him and brandish their weapons.

“C’mon, it’s a set-up by Organization XIII,” Axel continues, “Xemnas is using you to destroy the Heartless – that’s his big master plan.”

“Xemnas?” Donald questions, having not seen the pre-Demyx flashback that reveals Xehanort’s real name or the name of his Nobody that Final Mix added, even though both had far better reveals here.

“The guy you just saw,” Axel answers, “He’s their leader.

“Got it memorized? X-E-M, N-A-S.”

“Organization XIII wants to get rid of the Heartless?” Goofy questions.

“Man, you’re slow,” Axel replies, “Every Heartless slain with that Keyblade releases a captive heart. That is what the Organization is after.”

“So what are those guys gonna do with the hearts?” Donald asks.

“I’m not telling,” Axel taunts.

“Tell us!” Donald demands.

“You… you’re the one who kidnapped Kairi!” Sora realizes.

“Bingo,” Axel replies, “The name’s Axel. Got it memorized?”

“Where is Kairi?”

Axel actually looks guilty for the first time.

“Please, just tell me!” Sora begs.

“Look, about Kairi…” Axel begins, “I’m sorry.”

“Axel!” Saïx shouts as he emerges from a Corridor of Darkness.

Axel sees the writing on the wall and flees through his own.

Saïx keeps Sora from chasing.

“We’ll ensure he receives the maximum punishment,” the Nobody promises as Axel’s Corridor closes.

“I don’t care about any of that,” Sora declares, “Just let me into the realm of darkness, okay?”

“If it’s Kairi you’re worried about, don’t,” Saïx orders, “We’re taking very good care of her.”

“Take me to her,” Sora asks.

“Is she that important to you?” Saïx questions.

“Yeah,” Sora admits, “More than anything.”

“Show me how important.”

Sora, desperate, bows before Saïx. Not just any bow, either, but the dogeza position specifically. In Japanese culture, this bow is reserved for when you ROYALLY fuck up, as it’s basically heaping great amounts of shame on yourself and saying you’re equal in value to literal garbage.

“Please…”

“So, you really do care for her,” Saïx remarks, “In that case – the answer’s no.”

Sora leaps to his feet.

“You rotten…!”

“Are you angry?” Saïx asks, “Do you hate me?

“Then take that rage, and direct it at the Heartless.”

He snaps his fingers, summoning four armored knights.

“Pitiful Heartless,” he remarks, “mindlessly collecting hearts.

“And yet they know not the true power of what they hold.

“The rage of the Keyblade releases those hearts. They gather in darkness, masterless and free, until they weave together to make Kingdom Hearts.

“And when that time comes, we can truly, finally exist.”

“What in the world do you think your prattling on about?” Maleficent questions as she teleports in, “Kingdom Hearts belongs to me!

“The heart of all kingdoms, the heart of all that lives.

“A dominion fit to be called Kingdom Hearts must be MY dominion!”

“Maleficent, no!” Sora calls out, “No more Heartless!”

“I do not take orders from you!” Maleficent scoffs, before summoning more Heartless around Saïx.

“Fool…” Saïx scoffs, before snapping his fingers, calling in Dusks to destroy the Heartless Maleficent summoned. The Dusks then turn their attention TO Sora.

Suddenly, Maleficent teleports in between Sora and the Nobodies, before summoning a wall of green fire behind herself to keep the Nobodies from reaching Sora.

“While I keep these creatures at bay, you devise a way to vanquish them – forever!” Maleficent orders.

“Maleficent!”

The Dusks dogpile onto her.

“Do not misunderstand me,” Maleficent continues, “I shall have my revenge on you yet.”

More Dusks pile onto Maleficent, forcing her to the ground.

“Maleficent!” Sora shouts.

“Leave! Now!” Maleficent orders.

“I don’t take orders from you!” Sora replies, before attempting to charge in.

“Sora, c’mon!” Donald interrupts as he grabs his hand.

“But… What about…”

The green flames die down.

“Now then,” Saïx remarks, “Where did we leave off?”

He snaps his fingers, and the Dusks vanish through Corridors of Darkness, Maleficent seemingly vanishing with them.

With them out of the way, there’s now room for a group of Emblem Heartless to Corridor in and surround our Junior Heroes.

“Which side are you guys on anyway?” Sora asks.

“The Heartless ally with whoever’s the strongest,” Saïx answers. With a wave of his hand, two of the Heartless lunge forward, and are cut down by Sora’s Keyblade.

The hearts they release float up into the air, prompting a smile from Saïx.

“Yes Sora!” he praises, “Extract more hearts!”

Saïx departs through a Corridor of Darkness.

The two hearts Sora freed are wrapped in darkness and spirited away, collected by the Organizations.

“No!” Sora realizes as the Heartless tighten their circle around SDG, “The hearts!”

Sora, Donald, and Goofy are forced on the defensive as the Heartless close in on them.

Fade to black.

“Maybe everything we’ve done… Maybe it was all for nothing.

“What am I supposed to do if I can’t use the Keyblade!?”

“Imbeciles!” Maleficent snaps, “You can’t be trusted to do anything!”

“Huh?” Sora remarks as a bright light begins to shine.

You now receive Secret Ansem Report 1:

My efforts these many years have come to fruition, with the world I govern having become a paradise worthy of being called “Radiant Garden.”

Nurtured by the pure water that is the source of life, fragrant flowers bloom in abundance, and the people face each day with hopeful smiles.

But where there is light, darkness also lurks. As noted in my earlier reports, I must solve the mystery of this “darkness of the heart.” This paradise depends on it.

I shall perform an experiment to probe the depths of a person’s heart. One of my own apprentices, Xehanort, has volunteered to be a subject.

The young man has served me ever since I nursed him back from death’s door some years ago.

He had lost all his memories at the time, but later showed remarkable intellectual curiosity and readily absorbed my teachings, gaining deep wisdom. Any mental immaturity is surely due to his young age.

If I explore Xehanort’s heart with psychological tests, I may be able to recall the past locked away within. My apprentice Even has also shown great interest in Xehanort’s memories.

But is he really the right subject? Xehanort does indeed exhibit extraordinary talents…

Too extraordinary…

Perhaps they are even superhuman.

And now, we cut to Leon and Cloud, who are reacting to the massive ray of light from clear on the other side of the giant crevasse.

“Sora! Donald! Goofy!” Leon calls out.

“Relax,” Cloud tells him, “Those three aren’t going down that easily.”

Cloud turns and walks back to the town.

“The Keyblade’s chosen one…” he remarks, “He’s a lucky one.”

A beam of light shoots out of the ray and into the sky.

“See you soon,” Leon remarks as he looks up at the beam.

The Battle of Hollow Bastion is over.

Evil may have triumphed, but the world was saved regardless.

Cue Final Mix exclusive cutscene, wherein Saïx returns to Where Nothing Gathers, where Xemnas, II, Xaldin, and X have already gathered.

“Sora knows the truth now,” he notes, “The more Heartless that he defeats, the closer he is to becoming our perfect puppet.

“This new knowledge will make him harder to control.”

“What does it matter, really?” II asks, “Whatever his circumstances, Sora has never been able to help himself from saving people from the Heartless. It’s what his pure little heart wants.”

“There–” X declares as throws and catches two dice, “the dice have been cast. Things are in motion. He can’t stop this.”

“Nothing is set in stone,” Xaldin reminds him, “If the dice aren’t in your favor, you will share Demyx’s fate.”

“The fun is in not knowing, isn’t it?” X replies, “What is the point of betting on something if you already know the outcome?”

“Are you sure that defeating him won’t derail the Organization’s plan?” II asks.

“If he is to die so easily,” Xemnas states, “he is of no use to us.”

“That’s exactly what I wanted to hear,” Xaldin states, “It’s not in my nature to hold back.”

Fade to black as we return to content from the vanilla game.

On the Gummi Ship, Sora remarks about how help comes from unexpected places sometimes.

Donald agrees.

Flashback to how exactly SDG got out of that pickle.

We get Sora’s despair as SDG are so boxed in by the Heartless that they don’t even have move to walk, followed by Maleficent’s irritation that our Junior Heroes didn’t bolt when she giftwrapped a perfect escape route for them.

A Corridor of Darkness opens beneath their feet, and the trio falls right in.

Fade to black.

The camera pans down to Sora laying face-down in a pitch-black void. He regains consciousness and pushes himself to his feet, looking around until he sees Donald and Goofy walking up to him.

“What’s this place?” Goofy asked.

“This must be the Realm of Darkness!” Sora realizes.

He shouts into the void, calling out to Kairi and Riku.

No response.

Donald and Goofy look around, and Donald spots a man in a black coat holding a box.

“Who’s there?” Donald shouts.

The man in the coat Corridors away, leaving the box in midair.

When the camera cuts to a new angle, it’s on the ground at Donald’s feet, without having moved at all.

“What’s this?” Donald questions as he picks up and inspects the box.

“Are you sure you wanna open…” Goofy’s caution is interrupted by Donald opening the box, finding a stick of sea-salt ice cream and a photograph of Roxas, Hayner, Pence, and Olette posing in front of the Old Mansion, “that?”

Donald takes the photo out of the box and hands it to Sora.

“Gawrsh, it’s the gang from Twilight Town,” Goofy remarks, “There’s Hayner, Pence, Olette… and uh, uhm…”

“Roxas,” Sora completes.

“You know him?” Donald asks.

“No…” Sora answers, “The name just popped into my head… This is Roxas.”

“Are you sure you wanna eat…” Goofy’s caution is cut off by Donald biting into the ice cream, “that?”

Donald flinches.

“Salty… no… Sweet!”

The ice cream glows and floats into the air, producing the gateway for this space SDG have found themselves in, producing the bright light Leon and Cloud saw.

“Not yet!” Sora protests, “I gotta look for Kairi!”

Fade to black as we cut back to the Gummi Ship.

The Ice Cream and Picture are added to your Key Items.

With that, the darkness covering Hollow Bastion is gone!

Goofy wonders if the photo and ice cream are a clue.

And if they are, who left it for them to find.

Sora suggests it might’ve been Riku.

Donald remarks that they’re “almost there”, and Sora asks what they should do if the Heartless are back, since he can’t use his Keyblade without helping the Organization.

Goofy reminds him that they kinda HAVE to use the Keyblade, because the alternative is letting the Heartless eat people.

There are new episodes added to the Land of Dragons, Beast’s Castle, Olympus Coliseum, and Port Royal.

Agrabah, Halloween Town, and the Pride Lands have vanished and won’t return until you clear all the new episodes.

Additionally, the Battle Levels in all available worlds have been raised, thanks to the Organization flooding the worlds with stronger Heartless.

Neoshadows and Nobodies will now start to appear as regular enemies. (Don’t worry though, the Neoshadows in this game are nowhere NEAR as difficult as the Neoshadows in KH1 were.)

For now though, lets head back to Hollow Bastion.

Going back to the Postern will reveal the Gullwings are present as NPC’s.

If you talk to Rikku, you’ll see she’s being herself.

If you talk to Payne, she’ll tell Rikku to stop singing.

If you talk to Yuna, you get one more cutscene (which I thought you couldn’t get until later).

“Liars!” she accuses.

“Wha-” Sora remarks.

“Leon doesn’t have any treasure!” Rikku complains.

“And we fought for you guys,” Payne deadpans.

“Donald…?” Goofy prompts.

“Well, I had to tell them something!” Donald weakly defends.

“I don’t see how we’re going to work this out,” Yuna explains.

The Gullwings discuss amongst themselves.

“We’re just going to take YOUR treasure,” Yuna decides.

“But we don’t have anything!” Sora protests.

“You sure?” Payne presses.

“Hmm… let’s take a look!” Rikku states as she inspects Sora.

She then checks out Donald.

“Ooh!” she remarks as she inspects Goofy.

She whispers about her findings in Yuna’s ear.

“Okay, we’ve decided!” Yuna declares, “The Gullwings are taking all your items!”

“You gotta be kidding me!” Sora protests.

“Oh, foofie,” Yuna remarks.

“This stinks!” Rikku complains.

“So not cool…” Payne comments.

“Look, sorry we tricked you,” Sora apologizes, “but…”

“Forget about it,” Payne interrupts, “Leon told us the whole story. He said your journey’s been pretty rough.”

“So it wouldn’t really be right to take your things,” Yuna explains.

“We’ll root for you!” Rikku promises, “Here, this is from us!”

She summons a large treasure chest.

“Bye! Good luck on your journey!” Yuna bids, before the Gullwings strike their version of the Charlie’s Angles pose and sparkle away, having done their job of promoting Final Fantasy X-2’s then-recent release.

The Treasure Chest Rikku summoned holds the Gull Wing Keyblade (+2 Attack, +3 Magic, Experience Boost: doubles experience earned from defeating enemies when below 50% HP).

And with that, all that’s currently left to do in Hollow Bastion is putting that Torn Page back in Pooh’s Book.

See you then!

(Credit to KH Wiki and Mudarrow, as always.)

-

GOD THE PLOT

Axel being questionable as FUCK honey please!

Fuckin Xehanort I know enough about this binch and also that everyone’s fcuking Xehanort at some point

tbh maybe it lasts longer in-game compared to the recap but I feel like Goofy’s ‘death’ should’ve lasted a touch longer ya know?

[mtgpocketrealm]

Map of Komas - 3

The next innermost ring is also known as the Walking Wastes. The surface of this ring looks generally more like a standard landscape, with normal sands within the desert, glacial mountains within the arctic, and slowly eroding and weathering temperate slices. It would be hospitable, possibly even pleasant if this ring didn't have a particularly unique feature to it, unique even to the realms as a whole. Hinted by the occasional exposed limb from a now slain true Eldrazi sticking out from underneath the cracks and crevasses of the earth.

The Walking Wastes

Like a body fighting an infection, this realm's very land fights against the Eldrazi; conscripted, true, lesser, or otherwise. That is the most guaranteed time when the earth and stone will come alive when such unnatural creatures trespass into this ring, though that isn't the only time they awaken and animate. They will also animate when a sufficient amount of blood is spilled or when large enough groups move in or around them. Moving to bury the offenders under their bulk and consuming them in some form. Doing much like how the Eldrazi do to planes they find themselves on, they consume the mana from such corpses, occasionally converting the flesh of those unfortunate enough to be caught by them into further mana. Most of this mana goes to sustaining the realm despite the strain caused by the masses of Eldrazi upon it, the rest end up crystalizing underground over time. In times of a mana deficit, the lands will become more active, even actively hunting outside of the ring to satiate the realm.

The Trail of Fangs

The pilgrimage continues underground through this ring, the spaces are more open, the gems larger, more numerous, and filled with greater quantities of mana. The issue here is that the underground is animated much like the surface, and trying to harvest or in rare cases, even touching, the wrong mana crystals will result in the cave-like maw unceremoniously collapsing and crushing the greedy interloper. Also much like the surface, this is meant to kill any smaller Eldrazi that makes it this far underground rather than to actually harm any of the 'true inhabitants' of the realm.

Card Inspirations: Crawling Barrens, Hostile Desert, Frostwalk Bastion, Cavernous Maw

Prev

Start of Komas

Next

[semi-imaginary-place]

FFXVI Rewrite Part 2: Jill, Clive, and Joshua, Changing the Timeline

I want to continue Jill's established character as someone who gave up everything from her dignity to her morals to protect the women of Rosaria. She too is being crushed under the weight of her guilt of what she did under the Ironblood but she would still be determined to protect the people she had sworn to protect. While Clive is running around chasing Joshua and coming to terms with himself, Jill is plotting a rescue effort to Iron. This then comes to an intersection with Cid's plans to destroy the Mothercrystals. For Clive, he has just seen first hand what a decade under imperial rule has done to Rosaria, he sees its people standing up for their nation, and so him contacting his uncle Byron isn't only reconnecting with the only family he has left, it’s not only about stopping the Blights, it's about Rosaria and reclaiming for Rosarians the lives and freedom they had lost. I also do want to add to this section a quest where Cid tests and confirms that crystals are leeching aether from the land and causing Blight. Clive and Jill can also open up and bond over their shared crushing guilt. Both of them have killed large amounts of people with their eikons (though more deliberately in Jill's case), both of them of have been exploited as tools of war by their conquerors/captors. So while Clive is running around, at some parts Jill is pursuing her own agenda.

The next chapter is the assault on Iron and emancipation of the Rosarian women at Drake’s Breath. Clive is still the player character; it is plot important that Joshua and Clive are the only playable characters because Ifrit and Phoenix were once one eikon. However, while Clive might be the player and perspective character, Jill is the main character for this section, her actions drive the plot here. The party splits with Jill securing an escape route for the women with Torgal while Cid and Clive cut a path for the Mothercrystal and cause a distraction for Jill. They meet back up at the Drake’s Breath and Jill kills the priests like she deserves. During the boss fight Clive has to run around stabilizing the area and escape route while fighting off minor enemies while Jill fights the boss in the background. Additionally, Jill is the one to strike and break the Mothercrystal. Iron makes better sense at a first assault because the main power struggle in the game is between Dhalmek and Sanbreque, with Waloed waiting for a hint of weakness in Storm. Meanwhile Iron is more of a side player and so their weakening does not affect Valisthea's power balance as much as going after any of the other Mother Crystals. Jill reminds me of one of those bulls that been raised in iron shackles, the adult bull is more than strong enough to break free but because it was too weak to do so when it was younger, it stopped trying. Likewise, Jill's shackles are not of iron but they bind her all the tighter and this arc is about her breaking free and remembering that she is powerful both literally and metaphorically.

I'm changing the Mothercrystal lore in the game. Ultima came into conflict with the dragons in ancient times. In a last bid to stop Ultima, the Eldest Dragon shattered their body into the Mothercrystals to act as a seal on Ultima. The Mothercrystals drain aether from the land in order to power the seal on Ultima, but as the land is running out of aether the seals are weakening. The Blight was an unforeseen side effect of the seals. When Ultima breaks free, they then repurpose the accumulated aether from the crystals to power to their world creation spell. There used to be 8 Mothercrystals total. Now there are just 5: Drake's Breath in the Iron, Drake's Head in Sanbreque, Drake's Fang in Dhalmek, Drake's Tail in Crystalline, Drake's Spine in Waloed. Even on the map on the official FFXVI website other unknown structures can be seen in central Ash for example, 3 Mothercrystals have been lost to time. The Ten Thousand Tomes confirms Dzemekys Falls is the former location of a Mothercrystal, Drake’s Eye in the Northern Territories, Drake’s Horn in Southern Ash. The relatively recent fall of Drake’s Eye in addition to the spread of the Blight is what drove the Northern incursions into Rosaria, resource scarcity driven conflict, the exact same conditions that Elwin used to justify his proposed invasion. For Dzemekys I’m keeping that humanity angered Ultima and were smote but I’m changing that it was a Mothercrystal and changing the location of the last Mothercrystal (Drake's Wing? Drake's Claw?) to perhaps eastern Ash, islands off the coast of Ash, or central Storm near where the original Hideaway was.

When Drake's Breath is destroyed the first of the seals on Ultima is released and the beginning of the doomsday apocalyptic phenomena start happening although slightly differently in this rewrite. First is the activation of Fallen ruins, second the activation of the robots, third the wraiths, fourth more and stronger fallen and aether creatures as well as the beginning of aetherfloods. Then finally when the 5th and final Mothercrystal is destroyed and the final seal broken, all hell breaks loose and the apocalypse is unleashed upon Valisthea, aetheric storms cloud the skies and aetherfloods spread across the lands. Unlike in the game where the sky changes and the aetherfloods appear after the 4th Mothercrystal (Twinside), here the changes happen after the 5th (Waloed).

Like in the actual game when the First Mothercrystal's heart is destroyed, a portal opens with a partial Ultima that the party fights. As the party is overpowered but before Cid can go sacrifice himself, Joshua intervenes saving them but is unable to kill Ultima. I am dropping Joshua sealing part of Ultima inside himself because that had no effect on the story, that plot thread went no where in the end. Joshua as well as the Rosarian women are returned to Rosaria where they are reunited with their families, Joshua and Byron included though Joshua hides from the other Rosarians. This furthers the Rosaria subplot we seen in the game with Martha and Eastpool and the Guardians of the Flame.

A change I am contemplating is reinstating a party system into this story. This game doesn't feel JRPG enough, where's my party system? These would be AI controlled characters but players would be able to choose how many characters besides Clive are active at once with a maximum of 3. Some characters will be unavailable for certain parts of the game like Jote would not be available for eikon fights. Clive is your classic JRPG sword boy the main damage dealer. Jill is the true all-rounder with physical and magic attacks. Joshua is the healer and he's like wet tissue, he has decent magic. Jote is the tank with some support abilities but little offense. Cid is another damage dealer with big hits. Torgal is the only character that can't be incapacitated, he attacks, he heals, but most importantly he's a good boy (unlocks magic later in the game). I never said the party was balanced. Or maybe not, implementing this would be a pain as FFXVI isn't character focused so explaining why party members aren't there sounds annoying.

In this story the brothers are reunited much earlier so that their relationship can develop. Clive and Joshua's relationship is the core of the game The game starts and ends with them. Their relationship is what kicks off the plot of the game from Ifrit berserking to Clive seeking revenge unknowingly against himself. They are plot critical with plot critical powers, that Ifrit and Phoenix are the eikon of Fire split into two beings and the intended vessel to cast Ultima. And yet despite the relationship being at the center of the game, so little is done with them. Joshua is away for most of the game with Clive not knowing he survived and after they are reunited nothing is done with them. The earlier reunion gives time for Joshua and Clive to reacquaint themselves with each other. The last time Clive saw Joshua he was a 10 year old boy, the Joshua before him now is a man and in many ways a stranger. Clive never got to be there as Joshua grew from boy to man, he will have forever missed that part of his brother's life. And not only did Clive think he has lost Joshua, he thought that he was the one who killed him. The same murder against whom his quest for vengeance has been his sole reason for living for the last decade.

Another reason for the added time before the timeskip is to develop Jill and her relationships. Jill is also weighed down by massive guilt over the things she has done for Iron. Before Drake's Breath she is much more closed off and her arc with Clive is mostly about lost childhood friends because just like Joshua she and Clive are now very different and very traumatized. So pre-Drake's Breath it is about stumbling when this didn't before because they don't fit together like they used to and learning to reacquaint themselves with each other. After Iron, Jill finds closure in dealing a massive blow to Iron, killing the zealot who tortured her and enslaved the Rosarians, and freeing the enslaved Rosarians. She begins to open up after this and bonds with Clive over their shared experiences. In many ways during the missing years Jill and Clive's experiences have been similar though Jill's have been worse. Both were kidnapped as children and enslaved as weapons of war, forced to fight for the very people who enacted violence against them. To both their masters Jill and Clive were expendable tools to be exploited until no more use could be squeezed out of them and they died of overwork. Both of them see themselves as monsters over the many deaths they have caused as Dominants. The difference being that Clive fought to stay alive so that he could complete his revenge against Ifrit while Jill fought in what was probably a futile effort to protect the Rosarian women and children she had sworn to take under her wing. Jill also killed on a much larger scale in eikon battles and was likely treated worse given she was given no armor or equipment and her clothes were in tatters. Clive and Jill were also treated as subhuman by their oppressors. For a decade Jill shouldered the role of protector and champion all on her own, but through Clive and Joshua and most importantly Cid she comes to terms that she need not fight on her own, and with that realization she makes Clive her Vassal because together they can do more than each would have done alone. So before the timeskip Clive gets Phoenix as a teenager, Ifrit when he returns to Phoenix Gate, Garuda after defeating Benedrikta, Leviathan after proving himself worthy to its Dominant, and Ramuh at Drake’s Head as Cid’s dying wish. One place to put Shiva would be at the end of the first part of Jill’s arc here during the lead up to Leviathan, but there’s another place I am considering.

The next arc I am completely making up because not having Leviathan in the game throws off the elemental balance on a meta level and having all 8 would be significant in Gnosticism. Joshua is following a lead on someone who might know of Ultima, the Dominant of Leviathan and semi-rogue champion of the Crystalline Dominion. I am making this arc for several reasons. The unexplained absence of Leviathan/Dominant of Water while also establishing 8 eikons and elements was always strange, why bothering establishing 8 elements and corresponding eikons if its never explained what happened to Leviathan, and Leviathan is a classic Final Fantasy staple so it's strange that it is missing. I also always found the Crystal Dominion's neutral zone reasoning to be a bit weak, for example in real life Switzerland has a reputation of neutrality because of its difficult geography and history of shooting down all aircraft regardless of affiliation, there has to be something to back up the Crystaline Dominion because just crystal export. Giving them a Dominant gives them the military power to back up their sovereignty, and their Dominant flying the coop also significantly weakens their position and further explains Sanbreque's later invasion. Leviathan's Dominant of Water is hanging out in the Southern Isles fighting sea monsters for fun and so this offers the opportunity to introduce Cid as a master engineer as well as introduce Mid and the Enterprise. The game never establishes Cid as an engineer, we only hear about it after he's dead from Mid and that is such awkward storytelling as well as a missed opportunity. The build up to Leviathan is Joshua tracking down the precise location while Cid and Mid build the Enterprsie together. We only meet Mid after the timeskip in the actual game and we don't know how old she is. Aso, she's adopted so getting the ages just right isn't that important, and kid genius is already an established character archetype so what's one more. This would necessitate a younger model for Mid but I think it is worth it. In this story Mid builds the seaship the Enterprise here with Cid to create a callback in the final arc when she builds an airship of the same name this time without her dad. Leviathan's Dominant couldn't stand the Crystalline Dominion but is the opposite of cooperative and things escalate to a fight with Clive at severe disadvantage since priming puts the ship in danger of burning and sinking. I'm not a fight choreographer I don't know maybe they evaporate all the water in a shallow sea and then beat up Leviathan. However, she would rather die than stand down, but as she dies she spits they are fools if they think getting rid of crystals will solve all their problems. With Leviathan’s fall, Twinsides’ position weakens as they can no longer pretend to have the protection of an eikon.

Next is Oriflamme and Drake's Head, things happen similarly to in the game with Sanbreque breaking treaty to invade the Crystalline Dominion and abandon Oriflamme. This is Ultima's second appearance as another of their seals is released and they grow in power. Stronger now Ultima makes a bid to take possession of Clive and Ultima, once again he is stopped but this time at the expense of Cid. Cid dies later in this story than in the actual game because he's a great character and I wanted more time with him, to build his relationship with Mid, to show his engineering prowess instead of just being told. Since Joshua joins earlier in this story the more time allows Cid to help mentor Joshua too, in reckoning with his father's dream and legacy and how despite Rosaria falling, Joshua can honor his father's work by helping the Hideaway and Bearers. This extra time before the timeskip has also allowed Clive and Joshua to reconcile with each other. They have each lived 10 years apart from each other with only their memories, they are both changed men and it would have taken time to reconcile the old and the new and form a new relationship. The sovereignty of Rosaria is no more, both of them are nameless outlaws out against the world, and they have both seen much of the world. The children they were no longer exist and now they have to stumble through all that together.

In the game, the 5 year timeskip was mostly pointless, it had very little effect on anything, so little changed that a lot of things felt frozen in time. Thus, I am greatly reducing the timeskip to about 6-12 months. The expansion of the pre-timeskip period was partly to establish Clive's major relationships like Jill and Joshua so then when the timeskip happened change could be seen. In this story whereas before the timeskip those relationships were just starting and we see the first few steps of development, after the timeskip they have solidified, Clive has settled into the new Jill and the new Joshua. Removing the 5 year timeskip also removes Joshua's inexplicable avoidance of Clive which happens in the original game. So sorry no dilf 30 something Clive, or at least not in the main story. Clive is about 26 by this point. Despite aging the characters down especially after the timeskip I think the story still works partly because most of the characters are adults already but primarily because the amount of trauma and hardship these characters have gone through would have aged them.

Read this in one long post

Read this in parts: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5 .

[sophiie2000]

A Past Long Forgotten?

Chapter 2.

Words ~ 3454

Disclaimer ~ Characters belong to Voltage Inc

Link to Chapter 1 below ⬇️

Sharp aqua blue eyes scanned the room. They noted all the various security cameras, security personal, and locations of all of the exits. She internally mapped out the entirety of the hotel in her mind. A blue print forming in her head. 

The hotel was lavish. Expensive décor. Crystal chandeliers. Rich guests, dolled up for a night in the casino or bar, or any of the other facilities the Tres Spades boasted. Whispering to Hugo, MC noted,

“Clearly has a thing for opulence, doesn’t he?” 

“I wonder if we will meet him tonight?” Hugo squealed, blushing. All MC could do was chuckle, knowing full well Hugo had gone into full blown fan girl, crush mode. 

“I have no intention of making any move to connect with him. He is not my target. And frankly nothing good would come from meeting him here tonight. It just happens that my target uses his hotel… unfortunately.” 

Hugo was obviously aware of her past experiences with Eisuke. When was it she had confided her past in him? When he had been the one to discover Eisuke was searching for her?

“Spoilsport.” Hugo grunted, although the soft, understanding smile on his face belied his moaning.

“Hugo, lets head to the casino. Play a few games, giving me the chance to look around inside, then we can leave”. 

Nodding to her once, Hugo escorted MC into the casino. Acting the perfect combination between gentleman and protector. 

As they made their way through the doors, MC could feel as all eyes fell on her. She felt blanketed by the stares. Nonetheless, she kept her head high, face forward. Not once glancing at those staring her way. 

Stares of others was something she had become well accustomed to over the years.

“Babe, everyone is looking at you!” Hugo squeaked. His eyes widening with excitement. Smiling at him, MC shook her head. Simply shrugging. 

“Nothing new, not with your talents of making me look a million dollars” Her comment made Hugo blush, turning as red as a strawberry. 

As they continued walking, MC detected a different sort of stare. Not hostile, for the hairs on the back of her neck did not stand on edge in the way hostile stares made them. 

Although, they certainly were not admiring stares either. 

They felt inquisitive, as though questioning who she was.

Careful, as to only move her eyes, she found the source of these gazes. Her eyes briefly finding a group sat in the middle, playing poker.

Five men gazing her way. Each gaze slightly different. 

The man she recognised as Mitsunari Baba gazed adoringly her way. The desire and lust of this ladies’ man evident in those brown eyes. The artist, Ota Kisaki, too held similar affection in his look. Although, his was accompanied by a sort of innocence. Cute.

The lazy detective, Mamoru Kishi, briefly glanced at MC before looking away, back down at his cards and raising the bets. To an untrained eye, you would think he was uninterested by MC’s presence. However, she noticed the subtle glances he sent her way. The questions forming in his head. 

Soryu Oh, now his gaze bored into her. He was clearly questioning who she must be. Was she friend or foe? It was almost entertaining to watch his attempts to determine this flit across his face. 

But it was the cold glare of Eisuke Ichinomiya, looking her way. It could be seen as anything. Anything from intrigue or malice, or lust. His eyes followed her every move. Seeing him staring at her prompted a waver in MC’s heart, of feelings from the past, a past which should be forgotten. 

No. 

A past that IS forgotten. 

MC forced a lid over those feelings. Her mask firmly in place.

It was not her intention to make any sort of contact with any of these men. Frankly, she would have preferred them to not have noticed her. So, she took her eyes off the group. Proceeding towards the roulette wheel. 

Maybe she’ll stay longer tonight, so she can observe them too? Risky, she thought. But at least she wouldn’t be bored.

Leaning in close to Hugo, MC whispered into his ear,

“We’ve sparked their interest. Ensure you don’t look around too much while we are here. Move only your eyes. We don’t need them getting too close. We’ll play the roulette for a few spins and then move onto a different poker table”.

“Got it” Hugo nodded. They began placing their bets. All the while, MC could sense the gazes of the group on her back. A burning, as though they really could burn holes in the back of her head with their looks. 

They played a few games. So far, MC had correctly chosen the number and colour on the roulette wheel each time. 

“Black, 15” She said. But she had not been alone in voicing it. Moving only her eyes, she noticed Eisuke had joined the roulette table and was standing beside her. Eyeing her, as he placed his bets. 

Shit, she thought she would manage to avoid him a bit longer. How long had passed since their voices had overlapped? Although her face and demeanour would not show it, inside she was busily calculating the success of any of her attempts to move away.

“Ma’am will you be placing a bet also?” The employee spinning the wheel asked her. The sound of their voice bringing MC out of her head. 

Still refusing to look at Eisuke, MC quietly shook her head, moving away from the table. Her long curls swaying, offering her face and features some protection from Eisuke’s knowing stare. 

Dipping her head in a polite, graceful bow in thank to the employee, MC placed her hand into the crook of Hugo’s arm. The pair elegantly walking in search of another table. 

The gesture seemed to frustrate Eisuke, as his eyes followed MC as she moved towards the poker table. His glare boring into her, did not go unnoticed by the agent.

“Did you guys see that? She just completely ignored Boss!” Baba exclaimed in shock. 

“Ahahahaha that won’t please Eisuke!” Ota laughed heartily. MC could feel Soryu’s glare harshen at her brazen attitude towards Eisuke as she passed them to the other poker table. 

Despite his glare, as sharp as daggers, MC still was undeterred. A fact which surprised the bidders.

“Kid’s got guts” Mamoru said, while exhaling the smoke from his cigarette. Clearly, he was now displaying a more open interest in her than to the casino.

“I think I may have caught their attention” MC smiled, Hugo, slightly nervously coughed. 

Looking to the side, she noticed a few other seats at the table had been taken. Fuck. Opposite her now, sat Eisuke. Still, he had not taken his eyes away from her. The other seats, now occupied his friends. 

“Brillante, esto debe ser bueno. Por qué no me dejarían en paz esta noche? (brilliant, this should be good. Why could they not just leave me alone tonight?)” MC muttered under her breath to herself, making Hugo laugh, and earning a harsher glare from the man sitting opposite her. 

“What did she say?” Ota asked the others, all of them looking around at each other. Yet Eisuke kept his gaze firmly on her. 

“It was Spanish. Although, I am not sure what she said exactly” He stated.

At this, MC for the first time tonight, finally looked at him. And smiled. The minute she looked directly at them, they all gasped. 

A slight uncertainty filled Eisuke’s eyes, as he stared directly into hers. She held his gaze. Never looking away. Shit… had he recognised her?

“Woah! No one has ever held Eisuke’s gaze before!” Ota exclaimed. 

Now it was Soryu who was looking at her. He, too, reacted in the same way when he came face to face, finally looking into her eyes. 

“Only one other person could ever hold Eisuke’s gaze. But… we haven’t seen her around in years.” Soryu stated, trying to get a better read of MC. 

MC made sure she kept her features schooled. Despite her inside turmoil, wondering if she had been found out, she remained outwardly undeterred. 

“Oh yeah, what was her name again?” Baba asked. 

“MC…” Eisuke breathed her name out. While it was in reply to Baba’s question, his eyes continued looking directly into MC’s. Almost as if he was speaking her name directly to her. Beckoning her. 

Her heart stopped. Stomach dropping. To anyone around her, she appeared calm. No different. But inside was a blizzard of emotions. Emotions that she had locked away. 

A past, long forgotten. Like a mantra, she kept reminding herself. It was long ago. She had forgotten it all. ALL. OF. IT. No memory could remain.

Slowly placing her cards down, she turned to Hugo, who was already eyeing her cautiously. 

“Go get the car. Be ready for me around the corner. Text me when you are down there and I will leave” She whispered in his ear. 

Giving her a quick nod, Hugo hurried from the casino and downstairs. 

“Entonces, estás listo para jugar? (So, are you ready to play?)” MC smiled. At this, Eisuke smirked. 

“Let’s play”. 

As we were dealt some more cards, Eisuke and MC never once took their eyes from each other.

Baba folded. Then Ota. Soon followed by Soryu and Mamoru. 

It was just Eisuke and MC left. In her hand, she held a royal flush. She couldn’t lose. Eisuke pushed all his chips forwards. 

“All in” He said, smirking. 

Gods, she remembered playing poker with him when they were teenagers. That same trademark smirk when he thought he had won, riled her up then, and was still bugging her now.

All eyes focused on her. Smiling, she too, pushed all her chips into the middle. 

“Todo en (all in)” Onlookers had begun murmuring around them. Suddenly, MC felt her phone buzz. Hugo was ready for her.

“Show your cards!” The dealer declared. Eisuke showing his, he had a straight. Everyone looked at him as though he had won. Then the dealer pointed to MC.

“Well played, Sir.” She said, standing from her seat, dropping the Spanish language with them for the first time that evening, but maintaining the fake accent hoping they wouldn’t know it was her. She tossed her cards forward, as though she had lost. 

Baba grabbed them turning them over. 

“ROYAL FLUSH!? She won!” He exclaimed.

But when they all turned to where she had been seated only moments earlier, all they could see was her weaving her way through the crowded casino, towards the exit. 

“WAIT!” Eisuke’s shout trailed behind her, still MC did not turn around. 

She needed to get out of there. Fast. It was a good thing she had compiled a blue print of the building in her mind earlier that evening allowing her to identify the quickest route out.

“Soryu, catch up with her, I want to speak to her!” Eisuke barked his order.

Oh, hell no, MC thought. A quick glance behind her showed Soryu come running her way. Welp, good thing she knew how to run in heels!

As she made her way through the door, she turned back once more noticing Soryu was still following her. Great… she couldn’t lead them towards Hugo and the waiting car like this.

Continuing to make a run for it, she navigated her way through the back alleys to give her a chance to break out onto a different busy street and hopefully gain some distance between her and her pursuers. 

Phoning Hugo, she quickly informed him of her dilemma and instructed him to get home as it was far too risky to wait for her. Promising him she would inform him when she was home, she ended the call and continued running through the dark, thin alley.

After running further into the alley, she found the perfect spot before the end of the busy street to hide. And just in time too, for Soryu rounded the corner shortly after she had hidden herself away. 

The sound of his feel splashing through the puddles littering the pavement. The sound of him kissing his teeth before starting to phone someone, echoed through the empty alleyway. Snippets of their conversation filled MC’s ears.

“Eisuke, I lost her. She must have blended in with the crowd after I followed her through the alleyways.” … “I’m sorry Eisuke.” … “Yes, she looked just like her, but it has been so long and we haven’t ever found any evidence she’s living around here, I couldn’t say for certain.” … “No I know her eyes were the same, but without speaking to her we can’t be certain.” … “Don’t forget, MC didn’t speak Spanish?” … “Look, I’m on my way back, we can try see if we can turn up any new information on MC again, but I doubt we will find anything.”

With that, she heard Soryu vacate the alley. Once she was certain he was gone, she stepped out from her hiding spot and headed out onto the busy streets. 

Looked alike… MC… they really were looking for her. This was the last thing she needed while her mission was taking place inside his bloody hotel!

When she finally made it back to her apartment, she updated the Boss. 

He had been impressed she had taken the initiative to scope the place out, and had obtained a ticket to the IVC, and also identified verifiable information regarding the black-market auctions. 

However, he also stated it was now too risky for her to engage in the game, particularly since she had a history with Eisuke, under the circumstances where he was aware of her true identity. As such, she was instructed to not investigate until the next IVC, as a way to prevent potentially blowing her cover. 

She would be free for two days. Therefore, she opted to roam through the streets of Japan, a place she hadn’t spent much time in recently due to missions keeping her away. 

Pulling her long locks back and up into a messy bun, and applying some lighter, natural makeup, MC slipped into a cream knitted jumper, and some black high waisted skinny jeans, and some white daps. Putting her air pods in, she started playing a random playlist and headed out. 

After walking the streets window shopping for a couple of hours, she decided to head into a café with a cute interior. It had a cute, cosy vibe and was quiet, despite it being the middle of the day. The wooden tables and benches, and the shrubs gave the place a rustic vibe. 

Ordering herself a spiced latte and a slice of cake, she made her way over to a table at the back, in the corner, furthest from the door. She may not be working, but she still wished to remain inconspicuous. 

Soon the waiter brought over her order, thanking him politely, MC turned to look out the window absentmindedly. 

All of a sudden, there was a commotion by the café door. Looking up, MC saw none other than Eisuke and Soryu, walking in. Well that was her break in the café over. 

Slowly, so as not to create any suspicion or draw any notice, she left some money on the table and made her way towards the exit with her head down. 

They both seemed distracted by the crowd of women surrounding them, creating the perfect commotion for MC to leave undetected. 

As she was scurrying away, she overheard Soryu speaking to Eisuke.

“She’s gone” A quick glance at the pair showed her their eyes were directed to the seat where she had been only moments earlier. Surely, they had not come in just to see her…

“Ugh, keep looking for her. I need to speak with her.” Eisuke grunted a reply. 

As he turned his eyes suddenly met with MC’s, as though her gaze had lingered too long and drawn his to her. But as quickly as they had met, MC turned, disappearing into the bustling streets. 

“Soryu, there!” Eisuke’s shout followed her. Great. They couldn’t have just left her in peace. 

Luckily wearing daps meant she could run even faster than when she was wearing heels yesterday, making today’s daring escape 100 times easier. 

She ran. And ran. Making her way across town, with only one destination in mind. 

Shige’s workshop.

If she got to his workshop, she could hide. If they followed her, they would be none the wiser that it wasn’t your typical workshop. 

She could sense she was being followed. They were keeping a polite distance. One where they wouldn’t lose her, nor would they spook her into running quicker. 

Glancing behind her, she could see it was as expected, Eisuke and Soryu following her. Turning around, she started to speed up. Almost there. As she stepped into the alley, she began to run.

“Wait!” Their voices called from behind her, as two sets of footsteps, too, picked up pace. Quickly, looking behind her, she noticed they were no longer in sight, so she slipped into Shige’s store.

“MC?” Shige looked at her concerned. Her breathing told him everything he needed to know, yet she still explained. Even if it was in rushed words, and heavy breaths.

“Let me hide, I’m being followed. I’ll explain after.” Nodding once, Shige opened the hidden door below his counter. MC crawled in, closing the door behind her. As soon as the door shut, she heard the chime of the bell on the front door and two sets of footsteps, announcing her pursuers had arrived. 

“Can I help you gentlemen?” Shige asked the people who had just entered. 

“Where is the girl who just came in here?” Eisuke demanded.

“You’re my first customers this afternoon, I’m afraid” 

“Do. Not. Lie. To. Me.” Eisuke responded clearly angry with Shige’s response, “We saw her come in here”

“Wasn’t here I’m afraid” This time it was Soryu’s turn to ask questions.

“Look we’re looking for someone who was a friend once. We haven’t seen her in years and we thought we’d seen her again last night, and then again in a café just now. We just want to see if it is her.”

“I wish I could help, but as I already said she didn’t come here” 

“You’re lying!” Eisuke yelled. “Come on Soryu” With that she heard them both leave, the bell chiming to show they had walked through the door. MC heard Shige walk over and lock the door and closing the blinds before letting her out the secret room.

“Isn’t he someone you knew before you joined the EAC?” Shige asked, concerned. 

“Yes… apparently they are still searching for me… They know my first name at least and associate it with my looks. But they haven’t seen or heard from me since I left my old life behind. I don’t understand why they are still searching for me when I disappeared years ago! And now my bloody target is staying in his stupid hotel!” MC spluttered. The frustration of the chase was evidence of the influence they had had on her emotions. 

“That’s going to make your mission tougher then” Shige said with concern. 

“You’re telling me… at least I like a challenge” MC smiled half-heartedly, letting a sigh escape her lips.

When she left the workshop, MC found herself walking back along the main road. Figuring she should purchase some food from the store, she headed into the closest convenience store. 

Upon entering, she clocked the cashier. Shit. Baba sat behind the counter reading the latest horoscope readings. Best make this quick, and avoid eye contact. Picking up some Lady Borden and some other necessities, she headed towards the counter. 

Hi there, pretty lady, is this everything?” Without looking up, MC smiled and nodded. “Have we met before? You seem familiar?” Baba asked. Simply shaking her head, keeping her eyes down, MC responded.

“No, I don’t come around here too often” And she wouldn’t be again, she thought. Finishing up, and paying for her items, MC started to leave. 

“Aqua blue eyes are a rarity pretty lady. Not many people have them. Particularly in Japan.” His comment made her finally look up. Not disclosing her nerves, she offered him a friendly smile. 

“So I have heard, but rare as they are, I am not the only person with eyes this shade. Maybe you have just been lucky enough to meet a few of us.” Baba didn’t seem convinced, he nonetheless, let her leave without asking any other questions. 

MC made a mental note to herself… start wearing sunglasses or contacts to hide her eyes from people. 

[owlixx]

Mega Man ZX Advent Thoughts

Overall, positive

I felt like 90% of the transformations were too situational to be fun to use

The plant, the crab, the dinosaur, the bee, etc

Fittingly, I ended up mostly only using Models ZX and H just like last game, just like I would’ve predicted

HOW is the spinning slash still so powerful???

from watching speedrun sir Zero 1-4, it seems like each game nerfed the OP strat of the last game but not here

I got 0 chips but I at least got 2 life upgrades and a sub tank

Side content is actually easier to find and keep track of in this game admittedly

Really enjoyed seeing the ZX protag

I was sad that fairy leviathan was swapped back to a boy after being one of the very few female characters in the series

I felt even more detached from the elemental system in this game

Did they just…never think to add another element? In six games?

Like, I think they made the plant boss lightning just so he’d be weak to fire.

This game really did feel like a monkey’s paw of me wishing that Model L didn’t stick out like a sore thumb last game

I think having to transform between 20 characters makes it clunkier.

I would’ve much preferred for 4 different transformations to get multiple layers of upgrades so that each had as well-rounded a move set by the end as Zero 3/4

The map was better

Having a map at all on the bottom screen was better

It still drove me INSANE wanting to play as Model H but losing my map every time I did that

Unlocking new models should’ve just unlocked new tabs on the map instead of forcing you to lose the map as certain characters

I absolutely hate the scrapyard and I can’t believe I went back for a life upgrade

The plot, again, was just okay…

I think something is lost in localization because it all seemed so ill-defined and nebulous

God, it would’ve been nice if they had just not included that secret ensign cliffhanger, huh?

No music stood out to me this time

It was fun to see recurring features/details from ZX like the chandelier

I struggled with some platforming, I think

Much preferred the fast travel system here compared to ZX

I did play this one with the bottom screen actually visible

I will say that I feel like this map was less Metroidvania than the last one

Hardest boss was the weird green furnace that strangles you with vines, hated that guy

My headcanon is that Wily, Weil, and Albert are all somehow the same person.

I did have several screens in this game that just felt really good to execute cleanly, like more than usual

For some reason, I really hated the UI on the model switching. I was always getting confused about which one was selected and which way I was spinning the wheel. And a grid would’ve worked way better (I know it’s a grid on the touch screen)

Somehow energy crystals were even less useful in this game, easily the least useful currency of any mega man game I’ve played

Honestly, I missed having overdrives

I did use giga crush to start basically every boss fight

Got the final boss first try, although I did have to use a sub tank and I did play on casual mode

What even is a maverick at this point? Do we even see one in either of this games?

For the ZX subseries as a whole, I really like a lot of the gameplay concepts but I feel like the execution is a little lacking and I would’ve loved to see a third game.

For example, I really popped off for the finale of Zero 4 and ended up getting attached to the four guardians, but none of the original characters or moments in ZX(A) are nearly as memorable

I cannot believe that technically Zero (as model Z) ONCE AGAIN stayed behind on a floating base that was sinking

Swords > guns still

I just felt real gross every time I had to do one of the transformation gimmicks, like climbing vines or “docking”. I found myself trying to find ways around having to do them

I felt like it was kind of a waste to not use L/R or two of the face buttons to hotswap forms, since that was a staple of the X series

The cutscenes again looked amazing, it’s so cool to get to see it almost “behind the scenes”

I played with remastered voice acting, which I almost felt like was a mistake. The voice actors seem like they are being deliberately directed to overact so that it comes through when it’s bit crushed, so it sounds extra silly without the compression. May be why I had a hard time taking the plot seriously.

I did appreciate that human form still featured a gun, and that you were less often forced into it

I also appreciated the length tutorial and movelists for each transformation. As a kid I know that would’ve really helped me ease in to it.

I do kind of want to go back and play as Grey, having played as Ashe. I think it’s really cool that there’s an actual gameplay difference.

Side note: this means only 3 mega man’s left! 9, 10, and 11! 9 and 10 should be pretty quick since they’re styled after the original trilogy, but I’m not quite sure what to expect from 11. I’m really looking forward to playing all three games and then having my life back! Despite that sentiment, it really has been an incredible experience getting to see so many years of gaming history back to back. It’s hard to appreciate anyone one of these games without playing the others first, and I’m really glad to be having this experience when I am.

[elsternwick-rp]

Emotional Energy

As you may have seen, Elsternwick is currently inundated with emotions in raw energy form due to a strange phenomena, among other things, including weakened walls between universes, there are a variety of strange effects taking hold of a roughly five mile radius around Elsternwick!

This has caused the atmosphere to change color, numerous buildings to gain extra features that weren’t there before, and also cause problems due to emotional states of people within Elsternwick, such as summoning creatures, creating buildings around the affected party, or even changing their form.

What exactly is Emotional Energy? Not even the council knows, but it is every single possible emotion in pure energy form, perhaps it crystalizes, perhaps it takes the form of an unnatural growth upon a building, maybe it’s simply changed the color of the sky, or  maybe it’s hanging around a character like a spirit. It can take many forms.

And due to that, the applications for it in RP scenarios are quite versatility!

While Emotional Energy will not go away once Emotions Run High comes to its conclusion, it will still remain as a possible plot hook, should you remain interested

There’s so many applications that we on the Elsternwick Moderation team felt like listing some examples of emotions, how they could be characterized, and what they could possibly due!

Important:  These are simply examples of some emotions you could use in RP, as well as potential applications, you don’t have to follow all of these to the letter. There are no limits on how you can use these in RP! They could manifest in completely different ways due to the muse affected, and you could tailor them to fit accordingly! Feel free to experiment and get creative!

Anyway, onto the emotions and some potential plot hooks and applications (Feel free to suggest more or put some spins on existing ones!)\

Anger - Can be characterized as pure red flames,  could start as small embers but can explode into a big problem, can be put out by either enchanted water or calmness and joy. Could also potentially be characterized as rising steam and heat!

Sadness - Can be characterized by clear blue water, usually in the form of Heavy Rain clouds, can be diffused by compassion and support

Fear - Can be characterized by hazy green smoke, takes the form of what ones fears most. Can be diffused by courage and hope

Disappointment - Crushing pressure which solidifies into rocks hanging above, making it hard to move, and harder still to push them off. Can be lightened by comfort.

Comfort - Softer than any pillow, manifests as something the muse loves and is comforted by. Too much comfort can result in the muse falling asleep for an extended period of time. Is easy to diffuse with any negative emotion

Disgust - Can be characterized by Waste Isolation Pilot Plant-style horrifying architecture and pictographs of Sickness and Contagion (Added by Cecil!)

Joy - Spontaneous Flowers blooming, Fireworks, can also manifest as nostalgic elements such as toys, party supplies, etc.  (Added by Cecil!)

Despair - Stabbing hopelessness and apathy often characterized by purple glass shards that spread across the landscape and skin, can be defeated by hope unending. (Added by Marina!)

Hope - Buoyant hope that cannot be brought down, uplifting one through tough terrain. Can be characterized by bubbles and feathers to raise one up. (Added by Cecil!)

Greed - Unending want for everything in the world, money, power, the latest 5* character in a Gacha game.  Can be characterized by a strong magnetic pull. Too much greed can transform your muse into a dangerous dragon like Fafnir of old!

Wanderlust - A strong desire to explore and see the unknown transforms the world around it. Mundane places become giant unexplored lost temples and forests that aren't on any map. Only satisfying the wonder can diffuse this

Chaos/Impulsiveness - A desire for chaos, mayhem, unpredictable things! Can manifests as a wild array of colors that don't match together. Too much Chaos may summon a Mogwai or a Gremlin!

Hatred - Pure, unrelenting anger and hatred directed towards someone or something. Can often manifest as unbreakable and unburnable brambles of thorns. If left unchecked, can create fast spreading slime that can create more ( Suggested by Vin!)

Courage -  A strong desire to push past fear and to be a shield for others. Manifests as a warm, burning flame that shields one against the dark.

Love - Unflinching love and kindness directed towards someone or another. Manifests as rays of light and bubbles that rise up int the air. But can also manifest negatively as grasping hands that grab and never let go. (Suggested by Hen!)

Obsession - Sometimes ties with Greed. Can manifest as numerous, long, spindly hands, hands, or chains that grasp and and reach for what they feel is theirs and should be theirs.

Loneliness - A strong feeling of being alone. Depending on the muse, it can manifest as a desire that they deserve to be alone and isolates them further from others, or that they no longer want to be alone, which results  in others being drawn towards them

Apathy - Surroundings/objects take on a plastic texture and feel, the muse themself might also begin to take this on, though, they are still animate and living. In extreme cases they may become a living toy or machine. (Suggested by Vin!)

Intrusive Thoughts 2.0 - Textbox popups follow the muse, presenting them nagging doubts, fears, or self criticisms. This one isnt tied to a particular emotion, because it can be anything from guilt/shame to anxiety to an overly critical internal voice. (Suggested by Vin!)

As mentioned, these are examples, you’re free to come up with one, experiment with one listed here, or just try something else, there’s a multitude of applications and we look forward to whatever you might do with them!

[tansyuduri]

I saw a wip game that just said tagging everyone so here ya go (Some Spoilers)

This is from the third fic in the series I am working on. Currently posting the middle fic (Which I wrote first) then you guys will get the prequal! then the Sequal this is from! “So we owe our lives to coffee?” Merlin could hear the conversation behind him as they exited the forest into a flowery paradise of several valleys connected by crystal bridges. In the distance, he could see a small group of trees and then above fog on a distant island just make out the top of what might be a hill where several of the beautiful silver and gold buildings thatched by white birds wings and intricately carved round roofs. There were a few such structures in other directions but Merlin was focused on this one in particular because it matched where the map said Arthur would be. It was however VERY far in the distance and it might take a good while to reach it. He grits his heath Forcing himself to breathe calmly

“Yes! We were falling asleep and then Merlin reached into the pack and pulled out the coffee that saved us!” Sebile told the others enthusiastically

As his boots pressed against the bejewleed ground that served as a road of sorts Merlin found himself thinking about the visions, drawing conclusions against his will. All of them had been images of real pasts by how it seemed. All of them except his. What did that mean? Was his… No, his couldn’t be the future. No. That couldn’t be. It had to have been planted by the Sidhe to trick and unnerve him, and it was working because a small part of his mind kept up the constant what if, despite his best efforts.

The sorcerer tried to distract himself by handing out energy bars to everyone as they crossed the first bridge but it was no use. That part of his mind was still wondering if this was a vision of the future. Because if it was a vision and his earlier fears were right about this entire thing involving destiny again, it meant there was nothing he could do to stop the vision from taking place. Arthur was about to die. Again. If he was not dead already

Merlin didn’t remember stumbling or falling to his hands and knees. But he found himself on them as they passed the bridge. The thread he was holding on with finally broke inside him. And he began to sob as a thousand years of knife wounds to the soul started to bleed. 

His fingers dug into the soil as his tears fell heavily onto one of the gemstones. Merlin could see Arthur dead body again in his mind. He could feel the likleyhood of it crushing him.

That white face in his mind’s eye and cold pale skin, It was strangling his heart. Ripping into him from the inside. (removed a bit because MEGA Spoilers) He remembered Arthur’s body in his armsin theh vision he had just had, visions like the ones he had always had that he could never stop from coming true. Merlin fell into the dark inevitability of it and sobbed. Unaware of his surroundingss, unaware of his mission, Just of the pain that was ripping him apart.

If time passed Merlin did not know how much in his haze of pain. But a deep part of him finally began to pull him together. Because even if Arthur's death was inevitable he had to try to stop it. Because even if Arthur was destined to die, Merlin would spend everything of himself to try to prevent it. It could still be a trick, he desperately hoped it was, but even if it wasn’t he knew what he had to do.

Merlin opened his eyes and looked up into Kei’s face, he could feel himself being carried.

"You're back, Elaine said you would be and Sebile explained what you saw in the vision, We figured you would not want to lose any time so kept going.”

Merlin felt a rush of gratitude toward his friends. Letting them come, facing things as a team, had been right. That had been proven many times now. 

“Please put me down.” 

[ladylovettscribbles]

An abridged compilation of poems that I’ve written since the book was released.

The map is not the territory

You caution me over and over that this will not have a happy end.

When I just want to kiss your neck while you run your palms down my chest.

Every inch of your skin is hot underneath my hand.

If this is what it means to love you body and mind,

Then I smile triumphantly, in the face of being burned.

The territory is not the map.

It’s not that I cannot understand,

the pain and sorrow that awaits.

But hold stubborn belief that even when this fire finally burns out,

our work in that other space will withstand.

Maybe it’s naïve but circled in mosaic glass, candle-lit pews and green garland.

It’s hard for me not to believe in all that is enchanted.

My passionate moments with you, feels like a wish that has been granted.

Note: “The map is not the territory” is a phrase coined by the Polish-American philosopher and engineer Alfred Korzybski. He used it to convey the fact that people often confuse models of reality with reality itself. According to Korzybski, models stand to represent things, but they are not identical to those things. 

Things I don't want to forget...

The way our teeth scraped each other.

Each time you reached between my legs.

The way that you threw your head back when I circled your erection right, clueless, even through the fabric of your pants.

Or kissed behind your ears, taking them in my mouth.

The way you would take me with so much desperation in your hands when we kissed.

How you held me to your body for dear life.

The way that saliva was all over your face just from a single kiss.

How you breathlessly called me hot.

Your sweaty forehead, the smell was fueling.

Your tongue tasted so nice, I kept sucking it, licking it, over and over.

Fixing on your bottom lip, upper lip, clinging.

Every time you had leaned in to kiss me had made my stomach tight, and us stopping left me so aching, miserable that it was impossible to be quiet.

But this our place where I’ll never be silent.

I held on for so long, and finally,

I’m not sure if I’ll ever know a relief that was so sublime.

Our moments may be lost to time,

but these sensations will forever be mine.

(Part 2, to things I don’t want to forget)

Heat rose from your flesh, giving off the same warmth as birthday candles.

Leaning my face inwards, to the flames.

Flickering in darkness, orange light illuminating only you.

You were all that I saw in those moments.

Gently taking your hand, and with my mouth worshiping each of your fingers.

Ushering me to a safe nothingness.

Only because you, and all that you gifted, was everything.

I showered you with kisses, and you would suddenly take my body with desperate hands,

reaching and touching, searching.

You kept pulling me in, then I would resist stopping, refusing to cease my drinking.

It is not my fault that your taste is addicting.

But it means our passion could be endless.

You say only a couple weeks,

As if that will somehow cease our beckoning.

I’m not mad, just disappointed.

You caution me not to eat peanuts before we kiss, so it does not kill your wife.

Within that is so much irony.

I felt bad for her, and even worse for me.

The weight of that nearly crushed my spine, and shattered my ribs from the inside.

Reality roared, you will never be mine, and every bit of this far-fetched dream is a lie.

You say that I deserve more than to be a piece at someone’s side.

And in my mind, all there is are crystals and ice, cold to that of which you are blind.

I am the little mermaid hovering above the prince with a silver knife,

Unable to be selfish even if it will save her life.

Suffering to do what is right.

While also entertaining my every desire,

To love you under every shade of color, at night secretly confide.

And to feel you, all of you, the way that God does all of whom and which are alive.

So humor me in the meantime, every kiss that you can give, and each touch you can share.

And I promise at the end that I will not die.

But instead continue to remind you, all of the ways that you shine,

how you are in everyone’s darkness – a light

Devour me

This is a fairy tale, that only writers like us could fabricate.

Many driven by connection, long to create.

I am Alice at my tea party and it is always 6 o clock.

And I dread once again, ever having to be awake.

In this world that I find impossible to tolerate,

But more than all the fantasies ever, appreciate.

I know I can learn to drink life’s bittersweet taste.

My body is small and worn, but my imagination is one that is hard to satiate.

Curious, curiouser.

I smile, at your fear of causing me pain.

For I can embrace all the love of the world and not break.

So I am pleading in my mind, take me, take me entirely.

Mind, body, every inch of it.

Please do not be afraid to take.

For it’s in your arms, that I can decide my fate.

What I text him while in the car on just a normal Tuesday.

You’re so very gentle and warm,

And that is was the first thing that made me want to be in your arms.

Sitting in a quietly humming car,

Elevator like music playing in a repeating serenade.

Please continue to stay, for the next several days.

I promise, I will let you go once you ask but for now, you said you didn’t want to make me sad anymore.

Not while we are in this wonderful space.

And I will ensure that we both move on better and stronger than we were before.

I will enjoy, into the next month and maybe a bit more,

Being your girl.

-

Now what’s playing is a knock off version of Für Elise,

and of course I know, this space is not a lease.

I am not tied to this.

But I am addicted, the high of being wanted, needed, is intoxicating.

You don’t understand, you taste so, so sweet.

I could live off it.

Live off your kiss.

Let my body feel your hell sing.

White-haired and quick, you are my allusive rabbit.

Who has ushered me to this.

This enchantment, and it all started by you confessing that you wanted to kiss.

The pocket watch ticks, it heralds your arrival and when we are together,

Time is meaningless.

And I revel at edging you, on and on and on, until there are no more limits.

I want the embrace of the fire of which you speak, the most dangerous of emotions.

I will dare you, with the persistence of princess’s bewitchment,

if that is what it takes.

Cheeky.

Sitting at the edge of the beach,

Sand caked between every toe of my feet.

Selfish, conceited, and ridiculous it may be –

I am sad that I missed your message last night because I love to read how much you desire me.

Crave me, my being the only that could satiate.

But as you once said, I was lost in the sweet serenity of sleep.

Our Chair.

The chair and the secrets that it holds.

It is where two parts, you and I, have become whole.

I touch you, and feel that I am caressing marble and gold.

And you look at me, as few have ever looked at me before.

Every dirty desire, heartfelt confession, and enamoring story that we have ever told.

In this space, I may not have always paid for a service that you sold,

But instead what you have offered every-day, which is warmth from the cold.

You have never limited yourself, in search of ways to empower me to fly and soar.

This moment will never be known to the outside world.

No angel or god could ever fault us for craving more.

I want your chest against mine again, your skin is soft and lush satin, I’m biased.

But I sigh happily, remembering tracing the scar at the edge of your back.

Tasting your neck, kiss after kiss, my tongue running down between your smooth pecs.

Your heart beats underneath my ear, lips decadent beneath my teeth.

I didn’t mean to get so greedy.

I felt awful for not kissing you more gently.

But I do not believe an angel could fault me for this either.

For what else is a woman meant to do,

When before her is the most delicious man to eat.

Nervous, uncertain, maybe, did not stop the mouthing watering notion of having you inside of me.

Secrets that this chair holds, are that of your clients, as they face their ghosts.

Helping them uncover the self-acceptance and peace that their mind withholds.

My silly words are probably getting old.

But you had wanted in ink,

all the secrets that your, our, chair holds.

And will eternally,

until like our earthly bodies,

The wood of its arms and legs,

Are in a burning heap

Christmas Eve.

From forever secret make out sessions, beach vacations, reality distorting eye exams, gift giving, but mostly receiving, has made all of December feel like a strange but wonderful dream.

The had pastor had reached to hug me,

When she pulled from my mess of curls a piece of seaweed.

Everyone was so happy that I was there, that nobody commented on my sand freckled skin, ocean knotted hair, and body smelling heavy of the beach and sunscreen.

The stained-glass echoed with the song, carol of the bells.

Everyone in the choir sang in a different key.

At the end, we were ushered to sing silent night in the garden, all was still and black, and everyone kept tripping on roots of trees.

Holding dull-lit candles, that were blown out by the rain-scented wind.

I hugged Bianca’s Mother tight, she wore the most beautiful Christmas green.

When the song ended, she pulled Bianca, me, and Eric into a hug which he joined in reluctantly.

He was a good sport, and when it seemed most everyone had left, we hurried,

Sneaking into the grape-vined tower opposite the chapel using a red key.

I always nearly trip, regardless of the hundred times that I’ve run about the property, as the steps leading up are made of cracked, ill-repaired concrete.

Inside, the hardwood floors and spiral staircases are magnificent and pristine.

We left a card on the pastor’s desk, that was signed by all the members of the congregation.

Under the moon beams, not turning on lights to avoid being seen.

When you enter the sanctuary, you’re given a bulletin, and last night on the cover page was a picture of me from last week.

I’m holding a sign where I wrote in Hebrew, Tikkun Olam, which means repairing the world because the sermon’s prompt was to write what the holidays mean.

It was a beautiful Christmas Eve.

Midnight Calling.

I’d had a session with Luna that morning. brought my homework that she assigned me which was to decorate a shoebox, the exterior being what I thought I showed on the outside, and the interior being who I thought I was on the inside. Taped pictures of Regina Spektor, Japan, my family. On the bottom I wrote every negative attribute of myself that I could think of and then otherwise had it be a canvas for a frenzy of mediums. Crayon scribbles, streaks of paint, dusted with pastels, and then glued on origami stars. I must have seen myself as chaos. Can’t remember what Luna said about it, only that she gave me a look when reading all the self-hating words on the bottom, and I gave her a dirtier look back as if to say piss off.

The next thing I remember is eating a lunch that I regretted immediately after and then sitting in my room alone, in the dark spare for fairy lights, in my mind there were a hundred people screaming so loud that I could not hear my own thoughts. There was nothing worth doing. It didn’t feel like a suicide attempt, I wasn’t thinking that I wanted to die. I just wanted everything to stop. Stop. Silence, peace.

The pills were small, so I lost count as I poured them out into my open palm and gulped the handful down without a second thought.

At first I was annoyed because there were still parasites running down my arms, stones in my bed, and I could still feel every single thing in the world that made me upset. And then I could not breathe and all I wanted to do was scream. I never felt so suffocated, I was drowning. Gripped onto sheets, dug on my nails onto the rug in front of the toilet seat, trying to pull myself back to the surface, and nothing worked. Wordlessly suffered, because death was better than Florida’s sadistic idea of help. I did not want to be shamed, tortured, raped, or disenfranchised. What I wanted was either be dead, or to survive and discover peace of mind.

Distortions.

You sometimes feel that your wife does not understand you.

And while this is so far from true.

It has distorted your reality into a morally gray hue.

Especially, since I most often do.

For this lived emotion and experience, is something we have both gone through.

I have uncharitably thought those distortions too.

And when I am touching you, pleasuring you, it reminds me that there is color in this seemingly endless, ghostly blue.

You reminded me yesterday that at the end of this,

we will be able to say that we both grew.

Siri, what are boundaries?

The clean walls and velvet carpeting, the smooth hardwood.

In the lobby, silver Christmas trees glittered,

Soft-lit chandeliers shone overhead.

Indigo apartments, it read, so I was expecting a beige-colored concrete box and instead was met with a grand hotel instead.

While sports played on the tv, and the coffee machine groaned,

Faes and familiar friends in the far corners danced.

I felt something otherworldly rippling underneath the floorboard.

I drew circles into your thighs, caressed your shoulders, locked my fingers with yours for minutes at a time, ran a towel through your wet hair, couldn’t you see the glimmer in my eye?

I feel sick when you remarked that it felt like when you were a teenager, that you were not enchanted.

You were numb and defeated.

I feel terrible for not heeding when you pushed back, for not leaving.

I mourn hurting you.

But I did not want this enamoring dream to end.

You felt nothing, and I felt everything.

At the end of your hall, the tunnel was something new.

I have never been good at leaving anything, unexplored.

I will never regret it.

Not when I remember how you kissed my neck, spoiled my breasts, and the way that you threw back your head.

So much magic transpired, something for only us to treasure and remember, you sang to me, held me, I basked in the smell of your breath and the warmth of your embrace, I melted.

Every moment we swayed, I cherished.

I left happy, contented.

Relationships be difficult.

I walked in rain-freckled to see my brother comforting my sobbing Mother.

I have not seen him since August, and I don’t think I felt anything.

As a little girl, a teenager, I wanted to bask in every second with him, I followed him around like a little duckling,

I would sit on his bed for hours so I could enjoy just being near, as he sorted through all of his belongings. I wonder what he felt, as he shredded his journals, broke apart mementos, threw away every trophy and medal that he ever earned. Still, I watched understanding.

He was the first in my family to know everything.

The restricting, cutting.

8 years later, I embraced once, and I wondered if he felt my disappointment growing.

When I did give him a hug, without missing a beat, I walked outside after to the rocking chair.

I barely mentioned that I was hailing a ride, I did not say a word when I was leaving.

My sister texted, my Dad called, I know he thought of me, but was that just because my niece was asking for me?

This is not a symptom of a long-distance sibling,

But rather finding his every empty frown and pragmatic conversation, crushing.

His wife’s flippant behavior, nonchalant shrug, and the way she finds our home disgusting, has further perpetuated my Mother’s insanity and paranoia.

His desire to make everyone happy will probably be his own undoing.

But he has not done a single wrong, there isn’t anything that needs forgiving.

If only, his wife, daughter, and himself could take a break from criticizing.

For all my parents hear, is that they are undeserving.

Our bathroom is too gross to use, disorganization that they will parrot over and over is so off-putting.

Stop.

Please, enjoy our home, this family is so very loving.

Warm and welcoming.

Constantly searching for pious normalcy, structure that I’m lacking.

Stop focusing on all that is wrong and missing, just please, love me.

Me, and all the differences and peculiarities that you find so disconcerting.

Love me, and all of the chaos that I bring.

You work so hard for my wellbeing, I want to love you properly.

Like I do the other men in my life, who are empowering, who assuage my second-guessing,

pushing me to live loudly and proudly.

A toast.

We reminded each other, that life is for the alive.

Today I walked five miles to visit the Mad Hatter and Cheshire cat.

In case I did not get another opportunity to bid them a festive goodbye.

I miss you nearly all of the time.

Even if you are not always kind and won’t ever be mine,

You will forever be a light in people’s life.

New Year’s Day.

Time for renewal

The most helpful proposal, is be mindful.

She says pray for peace, to all people.

A message for nearly barren pews.

Thinking of you.

This holiday is my least favorite, skepticism in time, and anything to be new.

The weather is beautiful, sun warm and breeze cool, I’m grateful,

That I can share all that is cruel and love with you.

I’m quiet, soundless so I can bask in the melodies around me, piano and featherlight harmonies, can you hear it too?

I am studious, self-aware, and petty toward family.

Time is a great teacher but it kills all of its pupils.

And I watch you bend to its whim, to your peril.

Disregarding it entirely, another person’s ill. 

Abandon those of which who cannot abide by your time-table.

But what do I know?

I am unemployed and mental, in the eyes of ghosts still a mere girl.

Sitting with her dolls, basking in all that is around, perfectly still.

I am selfish, unready to end the affair.

You fear,

Breaking me beyond repair.

I run my fingers through your neatly-trimmed, brown hair.

My love, do you know how many things I have suffered with nobody there?

Crates and crates of diaries, of tear-saturated paper.

Please, do not be afraid.

For I have all I need to persevere.

Just please, be the one that is strong enough to say when it is over.

Not this week, or even next.

But spare me that burden, so it does not have to hurt me that much more.

I am still a woman that delights in pleasuring you from the floor.

Still a lovesick girl, who struggles every time to close your door.

Petty again, but Avant Garde.

In another world, we’re together having a party,

you’re throwing back your head and laughing.

It drives me crazy, seeing a woman with everything, so pretty, and skinny, utterly possessed by vanity.

You want to use only porcelain thrones, and sleep in sumptuous sheets fit for a Queen.

You lament about the dirty, the clutter and imperfections of all those you love, my Mother, your grandmother with dementia, why must they have so much trauma and things?

For their pain, you struggle to have any charity.

You complain about us not being able to move yet, not ready to leave Miami.

Are you going to therapy? Are you teaching?

You have your own trauma and anxiety, so please stop pretending any thing is that easy.

Silly Krissy, please, just let me show you how fun life is, when things don’t have to be the way that we want them to be.

This is more than just jealousy, for I know that your life could be more fun with me.

Life goes by so quickly, please give me more chances to make you happy.

Ushered in by 8 candles and caroling bells,

prey do tell,

2024,

Will you be kinder to us, than the year before?

One with a little less war?

Me? I am fine.

For with ink, I can always be reborn.

You finally said enough is enough.

At my throat, your guilt and shame clawed.

It is not my pride that has been damaged,

But the safety that I feel in you about to fall.

I was elated when this started,

heralding you above all other men. 

Even if I always knew that I was merely a bandage.

I am not even a secret lover, affair, I am so much less.

So many lies corseted in a dark green dress.

After this, you are going to tell your wife about the darkness.

But not your deepest, unfaithful exchanges.

No, I will ensure that remains protected.

I’m not selfless,

But my heart yearns eagerly for your marriage to strengthen.

I am not mad, I chose this.

Always on the chair and floor, never a couch or bed.

Yet more than I deserved, I thought, clutching a cracked moral compass.

Could you taste the blood dripping down my palm when you kissed my hand?

This neurotic woman had her naïve delusions fulfilled,

making her feel blessed.

Your touch is better than anything that I could have ever imagined.

I was the first one there when you were deathly-sick, to comfort your resilient, stubborn ass.

A cheerful friend to your family, a confidant to you, I do not have a single regret.

I did feel so loved.

A jarring reflection of myself, how I see us.

The end part one.

Passion like this is precious, and it is dangerous.

There is so much more to your life than this.

This is ephemeral, but your family and marriage are timeless.

You do not need me, eventually you will forget the taste of my kiss.

Your wife, your child, will offer you an endless bliss.

Nevertheless, I will never not be grateful for this short-lived gift.

The end part two.

My hand reaches to you, selfishly.

Don't leave me, I want to scream.

I know you aren't really, but you know what I mean.

This, this space, where it is only you and me.

It is the most wonderful dream.

I don't want it to end yet but if you're saying it just, then I will take heed.

I will be the respectful woman that you need me to be.

I bask in your passion, and thrive off your intensity.

Your darkness and light,

only further add to the excite.

Keeping loving me,

I want to plea.

I want to do right by you, be kind and just, gentle with you, it is the very least that I can do.

Gratitude.

I am happy to watch you now, embrace your wife, to hold true to your vows, and devote to her your life.

Your body, your passion, affection that was never mine.

For your emotional plight, you have my wish to fly.

Prosper.

You above all, deserve all the fruits and riches to be gifted.

By God, the son of Abraham, eternal laughter and delight, and are In the lives of others, a bright light.

Which is why I shall protect, anything you confide.

 The darkness that you choose to hide.

My young gaze is too heavy for you, I am too intense, too everything that sets you alight.

You’re relieved to no longer be consumed by my fire.

Longing for you all the blessings, everything that you want in kind.

Still, I hope you miss my desire.

That you long for the frenzy, ferocity, and unhinged devotion that no other will ever provide.

Pathetic.

I have cried to almost anyone who could bother to listen.

I should be composed and quiet, I don’t want to tarnish his name, perpetuate sin.

I promised him my discretion, I have to calm myself, be steady, and keep all we have done hidden.

Stop seeking attention.

He has so much to achieve in life and my distress could raise suspicion.

I need to shut up, quieten.

Stop sobbing to everyone about a man who hurt me even if nobody could ever imagine it’d be him.

It is too dangerous, it’s not worth it.

I should erase these poems, hide them, and burn them.

But I can’t bring myself to, not when this is the tale of so many women.

Who made themselves even more broken, for the sake of connection.

For someone who in another world would be your soulmate, you were made for them,

but that world is not this one.

I’m a lass far worse than any whore, who scorns puritanical-delusion, but far from ever being alone.  

Forevermore

I am so happy to have known you so intimately,

grateful that I have been a character in your story.

The warmth in your voice,

Makes it so difficult to make the right choice.

It feels like home.

I know that I can revisit, even when I’m alone.

Your intimacy, poems, comfort, affection, stories and more, is something I’ll forever hold.

You were not exaggerating when you said you are known to spoil,

Because I do feel loved.

I don’t think showering you in love and attention would have ever grown old.

There is so much, that I know that I will never forget.

How you narrated yourself getting ready in the morning,

I could picture it vividly, smiling.

How you yelled so passionately while you watched sports games,

and I felt lucky to be privy.

Every touch, held a new intensity.

Causing me to beam excitedly,

You are so much and then more.

I fed off your interest, your enthusiasm for just my merely being.

Any simple domesticity, that brought you closer to knowing me.

My passions, my body.

I would do it all over again, tenfold.

I would start again tomorrow, a month from now, a couple months.

I loved time being meaningless, and our world being everything.

A treasure, that I’m glad to have behold.

Scarred.

I cannot take it.

You aren’t someone that I will ever hate.

I went in happily, knowing that I would certainly pay.

But I’m unsure if you can truly relate.

You say that you won’t check on me every day,

but you’re there if I want to talk about therapy. 

Your tone feels careful and delicate.

I am not sorry, remorseful, confused, or angry.

But erasing late night phones calls, being called “pretty girl”,

Touching you everywhere, the smell of your breath, your taste.

This healthier version of you, might only bring me pain.

There is nobody to blame, there is only one man in your brain.

One whose presence, my heart may now find unable to tolerate. 

Not when I have known him in another space, and given myself to in every possible way.

Please, stop saying that I am not alone, and that we are in the same place.

You reframe, taking to this with a steady mind and pace.

Not when one was the professional, and the other was a patient.

You share a bed with a pregnant wife, and I with imaginary characters that I create.

I cried so much that I burned my face.

I will give it until Tuesday, I’ll give it a day.

I will make it.

The church women sent me home with a bag of gingerbread men.

And like them, you can be split open.

I do not want to hurt you like that, take all that you can give, again and again.

I hum the song Aiken Drum while I snack, so I stop crying.

I told you that I wouldn’t, that I would only laugh at the absurdity of it all.

But it felt like you were not listening, that you could not hear; it’s too soon.

That I’m not ready.

I know that you will never be,

that this ending is what you need.

I have to be still and breathe, I want to do what you ask of me, fairly.

I can stop being greedy, eventually stop longing.

Maybe.

You are what I see, imperfections and all and it’s not at all dissuading,

I should want healthy.

But you always tell me that we do not live in such a world, so hopefully, you can forgive me.

For being both stubborn and unsteady, and unforgivingly loving.

The way I provide and bless are countless,

didn’t the Lord teach him how to love me?

Every month of purple and blue bruises,

year of abuse,

punch after punch until I have no teeth.

then he woes at my uncontrollable oceans.

Mourns gentle embraces and bountiful seasons.

Yet his hands refuse to unclench from greed,

Thinking himself still entitled to all that makes my body.

He growls, voice hot against my neck,

cursing me and my fading beauty.

Grabbing onto each and every falling leaf.

Red, orange, green, they crunch to pieces under his feet.

Suffering the man’s condition of treating want as a need.

And yet I am the one left to bleed.

Hatred grows in me like a cancer,

I fume with heat.

Waters rise with all the tears that I weep.

How can I hold him,

if every tree that I use to reach is cut,

Armless and struggling to breathe.

Drinking my breasts dry and burning my insides to ashes,

His damnation is nothing but a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Each and every gentle caress sustains,

and offers what might be false-hope,

For a day that the air and water that I enjoy is clean.

River Styx.

It is so odd, to exist in limbo.

The uncertainty, to not know.

And constantly asking myself, at the threshold of my door, do I want to be alone?

Breathe, take it slow.

All I want is to see my bones,

But there is no sense in dedicating myself to that without exploring alternatives.

I can’t leave anything unexplored.

My supporter, cheerleader.

You are so, so loved.

By me, by your family, I’m never going to forget this, to let those memories go.

Whether or not we ever make more in that space,

Your affection is something that I am so grateful to know. 

Aht lo leh-vahd

Love of mine,

Don’t be sad.

King David,

Your god is one who is forgiving,

Not one to forever be mad.

As your Bathsheba for whom,

Your wife you back-stabbed.

She is carrying your child

But I make you feel worshiped.

Aht lo leh-vahd

In the aftermath,

You’ll become a better man,

I know that you can.

 It’s part my fault,

For I’m a woman who thinks you are the world.

The first time that you tried to leave,

I cried and cried.

This time,

I will try and be glad.

Aht lo leh-vahd.

Yellow.

It is so odd,

that a church struggling to survive.

is now part of my daily life.

A break from time,

pause in mind.

Casually listen to sermons with pen in hand,

daydreaming to worship and fellowship,

basking in the calm morning light.

While I don't pursue faith,

I find bliss in the people who treat me so kind.

The pastor wasn't wrong when she described this place as paradise.

But not because of the cool sunshine, seemingly perfect gardens, singing birds,

and sunday treats and delight.

Rather, the congregation's warm solace,

that any godless and world-worn woman would hope to find.

Greed.

I wish my old doctors could see,

How much they fucking ruined me.

It’s in the past, what will be will be.

I want to see all of my bones,

Or punish myself, until they're broken.

I’ve hurt everyone so much, that they rather be alone.

Then share the same air that I breathe.

Those men, their darkest secrets are mine to keep.

But I must atone,

for making my lovers bleed.

Ramble.

The blades underneath my feet carve the ice,

Creating intricate design.

I want to draw for you,

All the beautiful things there is to see in life.

See me for all I am,

You are always worth my time.

The Delicate lines,

that connect you and I.

May be smally parted by reality’s vine. 

But I am so glad to have those moments to call mine.

You will taste everything, all this world can give you,

for you are one with the earth’s resilient light.

I’m not lying.

Have I ever completely stripped during intimacy?

I am not sure, I don’t try and think.

Only feel.

It is only them and me,

Memories don’t there dare enter here.

All who have embraced my everything,

have been understanding.

Accepting and embracing.

The delusions are only a distant bad dream.

Every person has experienced horrors that’re reoccurring.

It did not happen,

It was not my body.

Research dug out the marrow, science drank my blood dry,

And doctors skinned me raw, shadowed by man’s perversion and greed.

Hands searched me as if I was an animal without feeling.

In safe examinations, I say unhesitating, I will keep on something.

When I asked before heart surgery,

All they could do is ensure my safety.

Promising,

And in a rare leap of faith, I chose to believe.

Shapeshifter.

It has taken many forms, many appearances, but it’s still the same addiction.

The same effort to wipe my mind clean, to give my life purpose, and a reason to be.

A false sense of direction.

Fifteen years ago, it was looking but not acting.

Once in a while restricting, or secretly exercising.

But it was not yet all-consuming.

Ten years ago, it was impressive episodes of binging.

A ritual that was sacred and nightly.

The most mind-quieting partaking.

On the right was an enormous bag of snacks, candies, and sometimes entire casserole dish meals.

A mix of whatever leftovers I could bring from the kitchen to my room discreetly,

and while my mother picked up prescriptions, I would quickly buy loads of clearance candy, stuff it in my backpack and then meet my Mother at the counter just as she was finishing.

On the left was an empty tub that would become full with what I had un-eaten,

And if someone came in, I would quickly cover them both with a blanket as I was sat in front of my bed with an iPad in front of me.

There was nothing suspicious about a teenager watching tv at three or four in the morning,

A loved one would frown deeply, concerned, then tell me to go to sleep.

I’d waited until all was still and quiet, before continuing my feast until 6 am, and by the time that I was done cleaning, it’d be time for 8 am math tutoring.

Now it’s something else entirely,

I have more than just math tutoring that needs my energy.

Besides, I prefer the fulfilling sense of control and perfection that comes from exclusively restricting.  

It’s so much safer, and warmly reassuring.

I can have the pretense of some sort of recovery.

It’s nice to be empty,

Making the slow crawl to maybe someday weigh nothing.

Attempt.

A purple aura around her, she whispered over and over that there was blood on my hands.

A woman with a fox tail.

I swallowed 20 a pill.

There was so much frenzy in my mind, faes giving me a look that could kill.

After, I felt lightheaded and numb.

I thought about grabbing more, taking another mouthful.

But thought better of it, even without interviews, I had a lunch date, workout,

still things in the schedule.

I miss and love you still.

A daughter’s tribute.

My Mother has not always offered the freedom and understanding you deserved.

But life is far deeper, richer, than being given what is just and fair, what we might have earned.

Sometimes the Lord robs us of what we should be allowed, over and over.  

And other times, we overflow with all that is good.

I hope you know that is how I feel when I look at you.

You are too wonderful and I am not sure what I ever did,

to have someone so compassionate and warm for a Father.

But my gratefulness is endless, and if there is anything that I can do to make your woes weigh less,

I will do so.

Sometimes I wonder, if you truly grasp my unconditional love, and undying respect for you.

You have my heart and so much more.    

Crawling on the floor,

Everyone is watching.

Pointing and staring.

You said, I know my worth.

Morphine floods my veins when you smile,

I’m high off your happiness’s warmth.

We’re more than damaged people,

Seeking to salve one another’s burns.

You are so challenging,

You ask me what is at my core.

Our love was more than me seeking dopamine,

Or you wanting everything.

You are forgiving, when I still want more.

Crawling toward you, reaching my hand,

Each and every one of your fingers, I want to adore.

It does not matter how many times I get hurt,

I don’t learn.

You’re sober,

Your shadow falls behind you now, in the face of light,

Through the clouds you will soar.

I cannot be selfish anymore.  

You know your worth.

See your struggle, hear your pain.

Bask in your pleasure, the window opposite us freckled with rain.

If only I could pull you into my gaze,

Watch the world through a lens of lore and fairy tale.

But I cannot alter your reality, nor can I make you stay.

I want to be the woman you need me to be so you can grow,

I won’t ask again.

But in the meantime, I love being here, I adore our space.

I cherish it, even when it has once again gone away.

It’s ours, and I’m so happy that it is one that we create.

Peace is something we crave.

I'm calmed by the sound of falling rain.

The church, it wordlessly prays.

I can escape, into what is quiet and safe.

My family has been causing me so much pain.

But ill words, I must refrain, spite has no gain.

I miss you again, again and again.

Do you see the world through rose-colored glass?

Stilling, as each and every woe pass.

Your potential is endless.

I sleep in the grass,

Wanting for you everything there is to be had.