#( and tomorrow it's my birthday so we planned to go out for sushi )

[clochanamarc]

i need to vent in the tags abt the housemate, and i need to find a new word for this person bc "mate" is much too friendly rn.

[vorfreudevortex]

3. three can keep a secret...

a street racer!ino takuma x f!reader fic // redline masterlist

warnings // 5.8k words - swearing, alcohol, smoking, reckless driving (duh), all characters in college or recently graduated, mount hakone's details are not accurate for the sake of the story so pls don't try to clown me for it, mentions of weapons, mention of a car accident, injuries such as bleeding and broken bones, mention of death

✰ // the cars and the reader’s appearance in this fic are purposely kept ambiguous so you are free to have aspects look, feel, and be modified any way you’d like.

the vibes for chapter three

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆ ｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆

takuma’s soft palms securely grip your waist as you wobble and sway. the skate park is empty aside from you two, the setting sun casts a golden filter through the trees and onto his glowing skin. it’s been a few days since he first kissed you. after finally exchanging phone numbers, you’ve been texting every day since, and stealing away time to see him when suguru’s attention is turned towards something else. he’s taken you for breezy late night cruises, let you drive his skyline, and hushed walks through quiet neighborhoods.

but today he treats you to sushi from his mom’s lovely shop, and now a crash course lesson in skateboarding at the secluded park near his home.

“i’m gonna let go!”

“don’t!” you shriek, clamping onto the cotton of his navy blue shirt even tighter.

“i’m kidding,” he giggles. “i won’t let go until you ask me to.”

you jerk back and forth on the worn out wood, trying to tighten your core like takuma told you to, but it does nothing as you struggle to find balance.

“are you bending your knees?”

“i’m trying to,” you whine as he walks beside you, guiding you forward slowly. you finally find a small center of stability, “wait, let go now.”

he steps back as you slowly roll forward, arms flailing and torso contorting as you try to hold the balance you had. takuma doesn’t leave your side. the uneasiness becomes too much for you and you stumble off the board, sending it flying behind you. he’s quick to grab you.

“that was great, you’re making progress!” he grins. you grip his arms.

“that was terrifying!”

“oooh, so when 4 wheels have a supercharged v8, it’s fine” he teases. “but when it’s 3 pounds of wood, it’s terrifying?”

“it’s so not the same!”

takuma laughs before wrapping his strong arms around you and pressing a kiss to your forehead. the contact is soft, gentle. you’ve noticed over the past few days that takuma is rowdy and rough when he makes contact with anything except you. when you’re there, his body and voice calms, like a precious glass ornament he’s afraid to break.

“we can be done for the day,” he suggests. “maybe another lesson tomorrow?”

“i can’t,” you pout. “my dad and brother said they have something planned for my birthday.”

“what?!” his eyes widen with alarm. “your birthday?”

“yeah,” you smile sheepishly. “i’m 21 tomorrow.”

“you should’ve said something! oh my god, i didn’t get you anything.”

“i didn’t expect you to,” you giggle. “you don’t need to get me anything, kuma.”

“no, no, no,” he pleads, tightly clinging to you. “i’ll get you something good, promise.”

“you really shouldn’t worry about it—”

“—sshhh,” he hushes you. “and this weekend, we can go out and celebrate at the underground.”

“i’d love that, kuma.”

“good,” another press to your forehead before quickly whipping around and hopping on his board. he pushes off, rolling fast and low as he approaches a ramp. he looks at you with a silly grin and playful eyes— it’s an addicting sight. “now watch this steeze!”

you can’t help but laugh at his goofy behavior as he lifts up from the ramp, the board twirling in the air before he sticks the landing.

it’s not the burning sun that sends warmth through your entire body, it’s takuma.

✰✰✰✰✰

that evening, chopsticks click and clatter around the kotatsu as your little family enjoys a comforting dinner. you, papa, and suguru prattle and laugh over minuscule conversation and steaming rice. but papa finds a lull through the noise, and takes the opportunity to say something that neither you or suguru were expecting.

“i talked to toji fushiguro the other day.”

ah, shit. 

you look at suguru, suguru looks at papa. you know that your brother never told your dad about the tense situation from a few days ago. and you both know that papa is still friends with toji, but assumed that he would keep his mouth shut to him. plus, incidents like that had an unspoken rule to stay unspoken, even to those who were familiar with the scene.

“and how did that go?” suguru responds, his words slow and careful. papa looks at you, his kind eyes suddenly serious. he holds a beer bottle, oil and grease buried deep underneath his fingernails.

“toji says that there’s some people who don’t like that there’s a girl running around and racing.” 

“i haven’t been racing, though,” you’re confused. you already know toji told your papa about the argument suguru had with his son. suguru stays quiet, looking down in his food with his brows furrowed.

“but you’ve been practicing to race,” you dad explains. “apparently, the local car community isn’t exactly excited that you’re here.”

“i’m just visiting,” you tilt your head. “i come here every summer, i think most people in the scene know that.”

“but you’re older now. you shipped out your car, doing mountain passes… getting more involved with suguru’steam.”

“that doesn’t mean anything,” suguru finally says. “who’s saying this?”

“i’m not sure,” papa admits. “but toji seemed concerned about it enough to come and talk to me.”

“and this was after suguru raced his son, right?” you ask.

“yes, but all that’s beside the point.”

“so what is the point?” your brother says, you can tell he’s getting irritated.

“well…” papa clears his throat. “…they don’t want a girl racing around them.”

“why not?” you ask and suguru rolls his eyes.

“it’s not like a girl’s never ran with us,” suguru scoffs. “this is stupid.”

“so, are people, like… mad at me?” you’re still confused. “they know my shelby is faster, they know that suguru’steaching me how to drift, so what? they don’t want the possibility of suguru’s sister being better than them? that’s so childish.”

“i agree,” suguru adds. “this is some bullshit. it’s just fun, my little sister wants to run around with me and race while she’s here for the summer, so she will. it’s not that serious.”

“trust me, i agree as well,” your papa looks anxious, the creases on his face seem more obvious than before. “it’s just that toji suggested that…”

“suggested what?” suguru huffs.

“he suggested that someone might cause trouble if clutch hangs around too much.”

“…is that a fucking threat?”

“i don’t know. but you needed to know, and clutch is old enough now where she should know it, too.”

“alright…,” your fingertips twitch. “so what happens now?”

suguru scarfs down the last of his food and stands up from the table. “i gotta call toru and ken.” your papa reaches over and places a reassuring hand over yours as suguru disappears upstairs.

“i’m sure it’s just talk. you shouldn’t stop having fun while you’re here,” his gentle words help you relax. “i love you, y/n. just be safe and smart when you’re out.”

✰✰✰✰✰

later, when the moon glows through the windows and the house settles into silence, you find yourself knocking on suguru’s bedroom door. you heard him come in earlier from the bar with his friends, and know he would be in bed now.

“come in.”

he lays back on the pillows of his bed with one knee propped up, scrolling on his phone. he only wears a pair of shorts and his long, dark hair is loose over his shoulders. his room is spotless, like always. against one side of the room is his bed and desk, the other a tv and dresser. they walls are covered in a tasteful array of signs and posters, the moonlight almost makes them seem alive. his dark wooden desk is littered with random silver car parts and tools, all clean and neatly aligned. his closet door is ajar, and each shirt is color coded.

you pad over and and he moves to make room for you as you sit beside him. his phone lights up his sleepy face, it’s a tiktok video of a beautiful nissan silvia.

“what’s up?” he smiles lazily, reaching up to wind his fingers through your hair. you slump into his shoulder.

“we never talked the other day.”

“yeah, i’m sorry. i got caught up working on satoru’s car.”

“it’s alright. i’ve already forgiven you.”

“well, i’m still sorry… never should of put you in that position.”

“don’t be,” you laugh. “i put myself there.”

“and i should’ve kept you out.” you sit up, his fingers leave your hair. he looks at you expectantly.

“nii-chan, you’ve never used your gun, right?” your voice is soft. “same with satoru?”

“no,” he looks directly in your eyes, he wouldn’t dare lie to you. “never.”

“okay,” you nod. “but, what about what papa said—”

“—i will if i need to,” he’s quick to respond. “and satoru.”

“i will, too.”

he lifts an eyebrow at your words. “huh?”

“i know how to use a gun,” you admit. “mom has one back home and taught me.”

“why would she get a gun?”

“i dont know,” you shrug. “everyone’s got one. so i guess she didn’t want to be the only one without.”

“you’re not going anywhere near my pistol.”

“i know.”

“seriously, don’t touch it under any circumstances. i don’t care if it's laying around in my car or something,” his voice is suddenly low and urgent. “if i get caught and they find your prints on it, it’s over for you.”

“you’d go to jail, too.”

“and i’ll be the only one going. you’ll have nothing to do with it.”

you’re both quiet for a moment before you ask your next question.

“why did toji fushiguro do that? don’t you think that was so weird?”

“i don’t know, i think just to piss me off some more,” suguru huffs. “either way, it was odd behavior, even from him. it was fucking disrespectful. he doesn’t know you like that so i don’t know why he would try that shit.”

“you still seem really mad about it.”

“because i am,” he sits up and grabs your arm. “that’s why i don’t want you anywhere near ino or any of the shadows. they hang out with some nasty people. fushiguro still does suspicious shit and i know he’s got his son in it too.”

“suspicious how?”

“fushiguro…” he pauses and glances at the bedroom door before lowering his voice to a whisper. “…fushiguro and his kid were the ones to help me get my gun. and i know exactly which nameless yakuza he sourced it from. and that kamo guy, the one with the tattoo on his nose, used to run drugs and other shit for him and toji. they ran around together in a motorcycle gang before they got busted and he came to tokyo.”

choso kamo? no way… he was so quiet and respectful towards you at the club, and he’s friends with takuma, the sweetest one of them all. same with megumi, he seemed so young and easily flustered, there’s not a chance that his own father has him sneaking around the city like that… right?

you want suguru to be lying but you know he isn’t. he’s never lied to you and his intense gaze solidifies his truth.

“you think anyone who willingly runs around with those guys can stay out of trouble? absolutely not. takuma and his boys were the first to get pistols. satoru and i thought the same as mom, we weren’t gonna get tied up someday as the only ones without them.”

“okay, i get it. but what does that mean for me?” you take a breathe. “i don’t wanna get caught in literal crossfire just because i wanna race.”

“you won’t.”

“how can you be sure? if toji fushiguro is this big and bad, i don’t think he’d make empty… threats… like that.”

“clutch, my team is more than just ken and toru,” he reassures. “sure, those two are always around, but the phantoms are bigger than you think. they’re just not around every time we’re out.”

“i kind of figured…”

“people say the phantoms run the streets of tokyo,” he continues. “everyone knows i don’t fool around. there’s a lot that happens when you’re not here. someone would be an idiot if they tried to come after us.”

“what about me?”

“us includes you, silly,” he smirks. “you’re my sister. you could beat most of them in a race after all. as long as you stay close to me, you’ll be alright.”

you can’t help but smile.

“suguru, i wanna be one of the fastest street racers in tokyo,” you admit. “at least while i’m here.”

“i think you’re pretty much there already,” he chuckles. “there’s no other girls who race with us.”

“i mean, even better than the handful of female racers around. i wanna be able to keep up with you.”

“is that so?”

“yeah. and i wanna win a touge pass on mount hakone, too. lots of them.”

“all before the summer ends?” he teases.

“yeah, before the summer ends,” you grin. “and then i’ll mysteriously disappear like i was never here.”

“oooh, kinda like a phantom?” he wears a shit-eating grin and you can’t help but laugh. “it’s late, you better get some sleep for you surprise tomorrow.”

“can you give me a hint?”

he looks up and purses his lips, faking a deep thought. “hmmm. it’s something you’ll never see coming.”

“yeah, i know,” you lightly smack him as he laughs. “that’s what a fucking surprise is.”

“i’m not telling you anything. but it’ll be a proper celebration of your 21st. it’s a big one, you’ll go home and be able to party now.”

“you act like i’ve never had a sip of liquor in my life,” you pull him in for a tight hug. “love you.”

“love you, too.”

you pull away and playfully jab your finger in his nose. “you need a soap opera on your life after the drama you caused the other night. don’t drag me into it again.” he swats your hand away with a grin.

“you shithead. get out of my room.”

at exactly 12:01 am, your phone sings:

takuma ino: happy birthday pretty girl :)

✰✰✰✰✰

your birthday flies by before you know it. papa, suguru, satoru, kento, and shoko wake you up with your favorite breakfast and gifts, including one that your mom mailed to you from back home. your bed is littered new clothes, jewelry, trinkets, and liquor at the end of the morning. suguru makes you play passenger princess in your own mustang for the day while he takes you around the city, while the others all seem to have excuses for why they can’t come spend your birthday with you.

suguru drags you all across tokyo. he takes you shopping, out for lunch, and then coffee when you get sleepy. he pays for your manicure, takes all your instagram photos for you without complaining, and to the sushi boat restaurant you’ve been wanting to visit. it’s not as good as ino family's sushi shop.

you’re exhausted by the time the sun has set, begging your brother to take you home so you can finally spend time with your papa before the night ends.

“your garage remote isn’t working,” suguru says as he fumbles with the buttons, the engine idling just outside the house.

“suguru, this has been the best day ever and i love you so much,” you start. “but i’m about to get real fucking cranky if i’m not in the house in 10 seconds.”

“relax,” he laughs. “go open the door for me and head on upstairs. i’ll pull your car in.”

you’re punching in the code when you hear suguru cut the motor of your mustang. the garage door groans open behind your back as you watch him walk up the driveway toward you.

“i thought you were gonna pull my car in?”

“i would but,” he points behind you. “there’s no room.”

your drowsiness had distracted you from realizing the shop’s lights were on when they shouldn’t have been. you look over your shoulder with wide eyes. suguru’s a fucking liar after all.

the shop is crowded with bodies that shout and holler excitedly when you finally turn around, and in the center sits your papa, satoru, kento, and shoko. between them, however, is a dark, blood red body of metal. there’s not a single scratch on the paint, and the chrome wheels gleam under the bright lights of the garage. the front license plate, brand new and snowy white, reads “CLUTCH”.

“what the fuck…”

“we all pitched in,” suguru slings an arm around your stiff shoulders and holds a key out before you. “still wanna go to bed?”

your life isn’t real. you stand there like an idiot, dumbfounded with your jaw hanging open. this is a movie— no, a dream. no, this is a prank. a sick, sick joke.

“liar,” you finally choke out. “you’re a liar. you’re lying.”

“never,” he says, finally letting a wide grin spread across his face. he pushes you into the garage and past the strangers. “i hope you don’t mind, but everyone here helped pitch in something and wanted to meet you. these are the phantoms…” he opens the driver’s door of the silvia and gently pushes you into the seat. “…and this is the newest phantom’s newest car.”

you’re crying, sobbing, bawling. you’re an absolute blubbering mess. suguru crouches down in the open door as you shakily fumble with the ignition. it roars to life and shakes the walls of the shop. the turbocharged engine sounds so good, so sweet. you wail along with it as you slump over suguru’s shoulders and wet his shirt with your tears.

you can’t stop your tears as your loved ones embrace you, it’s all so much, too much. this was much different than when your mom helped you purchase the mustang, matching whatever amount you saved up from countless hours working as a waitress from her seemingly endless bank account. the time, effort, and love that your family on this side of the world had put in just for you makes you want to burst.

you think about your papa, long hours underneath greasy hoods, meticulously tuning and fixing each motor for each client that rolled into the shop. you think about kento, serious eyes and rough hands toiling away at his side. suguru, who your father also pays for his help, and his hours flipping street cars to sell on the other side of the shop— all three of their automotive technology degrees from college being put to work constantly. shoko’s exhausting 12-hour shifts at the hospital, usually during the late hours of the night. god, even satoru, who probably poured a significant amount of his father’s bank account into this gift to make up for his constant loitering.

the nissan silvia s15 spec-r, used but practically in mint condition with only 2,500 miles on it. a 4-cylinder turbo engine with horsepower up to 250. a 6 speed transmission, of course, and 274 newton-meters of torque. 

it’s fucking beautiful.

it’s yours.

✰✰✰✰✰

it’s deep into the night when suguru, satoru, and shoko step outside for a cigarette. your papa has already gone to bed and the rest of the phantoms are gone. you had made sure to thank each and every one of them before they left. most stayed close during the evening, taking turns watching papa and kento guiding you through the foreign engine and its components. 

it was just you and kento now, gently wiping down the sparkling red paint with soft towels in the peaceful silence of the garage. you sit on the concrete, getting the low corners of the nose while he leans over the hood, carefully erasing any fingerprints and dust.

“it’s quite the ride,” kento says quietly. his eyes droop with exhaustion from running around all day with papa and satoru to get the silvia in time.

“it really is," you smile. "thank you so much again, ken."

“you’ll be cruising along with us now,” he adds. “no need to ride in our passenger seats anymore like you used to.”

you can’t help but giggle, floating high and light through your sleepiness with the liquor and adrenaline of today. you think of all the times you’ve rode shotgun with each of the boys growing up, clutching onto the handles as they’d fly around just to make you shriek with happiness. it almost makes you want to cry, knowing those innocent days have ended, but you blink away the tears.

“i’ll still hop in with you every so often, don’t worry,” but kento doesn’t respond at first, instead he crouches down to your level.

“y/n, you should know that…” his voice is low, barely above a whisper as he pauses to glance at the cracked door. in the second of silence, you can hear your brother’s voice outside. kento’s brown eyes turn back and bore into you with insane intensity.

“…i saw you yesterday.”

he sees the confusion in your face. yesterday? wait—

“with takuma ino.”

fuck.

“…y-you did?” your voice shakes. you internally panic, you don’t know what to say.

“at the skate park, didn’t i?”

oh, he’s got you now. you hesitate in how to respond, but then silently nod your head. you’ve never lied to kento, and you won’t start now.

“i thought so.”

“i’m sorry…” you whisper. your heart pounds so loudly in your chest that you’re afraid kento can hear it. his eyes soften just the slightest bit.

“you didn’t know i live in that area as well, didn’t you?” his question sounds more like a statement. you shake your head, frightful tears forming in your eyes. you can’t even imagine the angry words your brother will chastise you with when he finds out, or worse, the angry fists he'd throw at takuma. “calm down. i’m not going to tell suguru.”

“you’re not?”

“no. it’s not my business.”

he stands up on his feet once more. you swallow harshly, willing the blush on your cheeks and the beating in your chest to calm down. kento has never scared you, but as you look up at his towering stance from the floor, you’re nothing but intimidated.

“but you will tell him when the time is right. and you will be careful around ino and the shadows. do you understand?”

“i understand,” you manage to croak out. you feel like you’re being disciplined by your father, or maybe your high school principle. kento just nods and motions for you to stand up beside him.

“you will also drive safely and responsibly with this new car,” his finger taps the hood. “only your father and i are allowed to tune this engine. if you get in an accident, it will be because of your driving. i will not allow this motor to fail on you under any circumstances whatsoever. if there is even a speck of dust positioned incorrectly on this motor, i will not allow you to race. do you understand?”

“yes, i understand.”

“i know your brother has told you about what happened to yu. i won’t allow anything like that to happen to you,” his face changes ever so slightly, an unreadable expression. your heart skips a beat, you know all about what happened to yu haibara. 

you’ve seen glimpses of the burn marks on kento’s side, the ones from him pulling his childhood friend from a blazing car. yu haibara didn’t stand a chance, he had died in the initial wreck before the engine even caught on fire. kento had crawled out of the passenger seat, bones snapped in half and stabbing through his skin, before crawling back in when he realized yu hadn’t come out yet. bleeding and broken, he had cradled yu’s lifeless body on the touge of mount fuji until help finally came to him. kento has never raced since.

“thank you, ken,” you whisper. you know he's dead serious, he would never say such a thing if he didn't truly and absolutely mean it.

kento pulls you in for a swallowing hug, the musk of his cologne filling your lungs as he wraps you into his chest.

“damn,” you turn at satoru’s teasing voice. “someone take a picture, ken’s showing emotion.”

the trio enters the garage with drowsy faces, reeking of tobacco. kento lets go, you pray they only caught the last part of your conversation.

“all cleaned up, huh?” suguru whistles.

your brother steps between you to lean over and closely inspect the glowing red paint, kento stands stiffly on the other side of him. you glance at him. he has a soft, knowing look in his eyes, and dimples emerge in his cheeks as he puts on gentle smile. you have complete trust in knowing that kento will keep your secret safe as he opens his mouth to speak.

“yeah. all cleaned up.”

✰✰✰✰✰

all week long, you wake up early and stay up late. the boys work with you every day while your papa tinkers alongside you between his own clients. shoko stops by after her shifts for a beer and cigarette to watch the boys work. 

the first engine modifications include a better cold air intake and exhaust, while kento insists that he reprograms the ecu so your throttle response is absolutely perfect. suguru orders brand new coilovers while satoru and your papa lightly argue over which strut and sway bars will be best for you. 

the five of you spend an entire day on new tires and cambers until the angle is exactly the way you want it, and another few days installing a gorgeous wide body kit for the wheels. papa focuses on replacing the stock clutch and gear shifter. kento helps you with the brake calipers and pads. you thought you knew plenty about cars and motors, but each hour you feel like you’re being introduced to a new component or tool that you didn’t know existed. 

at the end of every night, you’re leaning against the shower wall with sleepy eyes trying to scrub the grease and oil from the crevices of your skin and the bed of your fingernails. you’re not sure the dark smell of the motor will ever leave your hair, but you slide into your bed light-headed and happy knowing your family loves you enough to provide so much for you.

you don’t talk to takuma much as week passes, only a few messages here and there. you’re too busy feeling filthy with guilt every time the boys open up a box of brand new parts for your car. but every time you start to say something, someone is shushing you. you know how expensive each part is, and on top of the expense of the car… you feel sick to your stomach just thinking about how many digits follow the dollar sign.

although you’ve taken your new silvia for a few spins, you’re itching to get out to the mountain as the week comes to an end and the car comes closer to completion. it’s all you’ve wanted to do all summer, all you’ve wanted to do for years, and now you finally have your very own vehicle to do so.

the large door of the garage is wide open and the sun is setting, shooting rays of gold into the garage and over the silvia. warm summer breezes sift through the shop. suguru talks you through properly applying a sticker on your back windshield. it’s the same one you’ve seen on all the boys’ cars; a bright white hooded ghost figure with glowing red eyes— a phantom. when you’re finished wiping it down, your brother ruffles your hair and smiles.

“let’s go to mount hakone.”

you truly couldn’t be happier. there’s no races tonight, but there’s still a few scattered cars hanging out around the straight. a few of them take casual passes through the mountain, but nothing high stakes. you recognize a few familiar phantom faces and make sure to take the time to greet them and show them your finished project, thanking them incessantly for helping your family purchase the silvia until they’re practically begging you to stop.

everyone shows respect when suguru announces he wants you to have a turn through alone. they stay back on the shoulder to wait until you come back through again, giving you supportive words as you start warming up the engine. suguru hands you the black helmet from the passenger seat for the nth time.

“where did you even get this?” you ask him as you pull it over your hair. “you’ve never even owned a motorcycle.”

“it’s for your safety,” he reaches over to make sure the chinstrap is tight enough.

“i asked where, not why,” you giggle.

“i don’t even remember. it’s been laying around in my closet for a while.”

“it’s a cool helmet! practically brand new.”

“you’re the only one to wear it.”

you fasten your new seatbelt across your chest, a red racing harness that matches the maroon paint of the silvia. suguru does the same before pulling on your straps once more.

“i got it!” you whine. “it’s tight enough.”

“i just need to be sure,” he settles back in the passenger seat. “let’s run it.”

you press the gas, making the glistening new tires spin in place against the rough concrete until your gut tells you they’re sticky enough. your foot lifts from the brake, and the car is set free. your mind thinks of nothing except redlining the engine and the upcoming turn the entire way through.

your mind has made friends with each bend, rock, and tree along the path. every time you come to mount hakone, your confident builds higher and higher. and with the silvia now in your control, you’re raring to go. each day that passes means your time in japan is getting shorter, and you want— no, need— to get faster.

back at the straight, suguru whistles as you pull the handbrake for the final time and take out the key. the engine stands still and hot, you can hear the faint tick tick ticking under the hood as you tear off the constricting helmet. your hair sticks to your forehead, damp with sweat, as you try and catch your breathe. suguru shows you his phone screen.

8:42:35

it’s nowhere close to suguru’s. although unofficial because of its illegality, all the street racers in tokyo know that your brother holds the fastest time at mount hakone— 6:48:02.

“8 minutes?” you whine, even though it’s a whopping 5 seconds faster than the last pass you completed.

“this is an insanely good time,” suguru chuckles.

“no it’s not! it’s over 2 minutes slower than you.”

“relax, clutch—”

“—and a minute and 40-something seconds slower than toru.”

“you’ve already gotten so much faster since you—”

“—and a minute and 38 seconds slower than kento!”

“cool it,” suguru warns against your rare show of brattiness. “don’t pout about it. this is still faster than a lot of racers around here.

you’re still panting. you unclasp the seatbelt, slouching as your head falls back into the black suede of the headrest and close your eyes.

“you’re right, suguru. i’m sorry,” you say softly. “i’m sorry, i’m just tense from all that. it’s a good time, i know that.”

“don’t apologize, it’s alright,” he reassures. “let’s take a break.”

you pull your car to the shoulder and practically kick open the door to get out. although the icy air you had blasting during the race kept your skin cool, the cool mountain air made you feel as if you could actually breathe again. a handful of phantoms come over to you, complimenting your improving time and suggesting helpful tips while another round of racers loudly speed into the mountains.

a pair of boys your age stand off to the side, listening closely until the others leave. the dark-haired one with sleepy eyes holds a hand out to your brother first. unlike takuma, it seems like he already knows how not to piss suguru off.

“geto-san, nice to meet you,” he smiles. “my name is yuta okkotsu.”

suguru returns his smile and shakes his hand. okkotsu and his friend turn to you with a small bow before he places a hand on the shoulder of the smaller blonde boy wearing a black mask over his mouth and nose.

“this is toge inumaki,” he continues. “he’s mute, but he can hear you just fine.”

“oh, nice to meet you!” you smile.

“inumaki was wondering if you’d like to race tomorrow night, before ino-san and gojo-san,” okkotsu explains with his eyes trained on you. you look back at him but your mind is elsewhere. you didn’t know takuma and satoru were set to race tomorrow.

“uh, me?” you ask. you’re a little surprised, you weren’t expecting someone to approach you first, especially knowing now that people didn’t want you to race. inumaki raises his hands, fingers swimming through the air as he signs to okkotsu.

“if it’s alright with the both of you,” he explains. you can see the raised cheekbones of inumaki’s smile from under his mask. “inumaki just started racing as well, he thought it would be good experience for the both of you.”

“what’s your time?” suguru asks, but he speaks directly to inumaki. the boy’s eyes dart from suguru to okkotsu, nervous that suguru won’t be able to understand him. but he raises his hands anyways, and the slender fingers start to move.

eight. three. nine.

“8 minutes, 39 seconds?” suguru clarifies, inumaki nods. he clearly doesn’t care that the boy can’t speak, he just wants to know how fast he is.

“and what team are you two with?” he asks.

“we aren’t on any team,” okkotsu answers. “we’re pretty new to the scene, we just race for fun. and we don’t race for pinks or money.”

“how old are you two?”

“…17,” the boy smiles sheepishly. your brother chuckles lightly.

“well, how ‘bout it, clutch?” suguru hums. “you wanna race this guy?”

“…can i?” you respond. you’re asking suguru if he thinks you’re ready for a true touge race more than you’re asking for his permission to.

“if you want. i think you’re ready.” you smile at your brother and turn back to the boys. you hope you don’t seem too giddy, but your heart pounds with the anticipation of your first real race.

“let’s do it, inumaki-kun!”

he puts his hand to his chin and out, thank you. then, a fist with his pinky and thumb out with a gentle shake, shaka. you giggle lightly as you mimic his hands.

“but first,” suguru steps forward, towering over the boys. “we’ll do three practice passes right now with the two of you. she’s never gone through with a second car. we’ll take it slow and easy, keep your distance from her.”

inumaki nods and your brother turns to you.

“i’ll ride with you in the first round, but that’s it,” it’s your turn to nod to suguru. “helmet on, clutch. let’s go.”

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆ ｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆

tag list // @stillnotherapy @rieamena @magiamad0ka

comment if you'd like to be added.

© vorfreudevortex | all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, repost, or otherwise share my work.

[the---hermit]

Yes I am showing off again the tma themed coverpage of my bullet jorunal, but on my defense I think it's cool and people asked me to post more bujo pics.

23|05|2023

18/50 days of productivity

Today I wanted to catch up with at least half of yesterday's history of religions lecture before leaving earlier and meeting with a friend. Of course today the website decided not to work, so I had to change my study plans last minute. I did some reading instead, and then as I said I left early to meet up with a friend. We decided to go eat sushi before to celebrate his birthday. It was lovely to eat out with a friend, I hadn't done that in a while. The day was overall pretty chaotic and I am really tired. I am considering taking the whole weekens off to recharge before I doing some hardcore studying for my exams, but I'll decide tomorrow after doing some planning.

Productivity:

finished reading and highlighting the second chapeter of The Creation Of Mythology by M. Detienne (aka the book I have to study for my history of religions class, and that I am hating with all my heart)

booked an haircut (or better I talked with my brother to fix a date cause apparently it's now a thing that we go cut our hair together and he got the appointment for both of us, but there was some planning so that's productivity)

last in person class (and I will have to rewatch the recording and waste more time because I was struggling and to make things more comolicated the person next to me wouldn't shut up so there's that)

practiced Irish on duolingo

listened to the latest episode of the books unboud podcast

Self care:

read first thing in the morning

wore a nice outfit to get motivation to get out of the house

went to lunch with a friend before our last in person class of the semester

📖:The Left Hand Of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin

[adventuresasmrsfindley]

What a great day!! Picked my neighbor friend up around 11. We went for sushi. A new to me place that was soooo good! (And she bought my lunch as a late bday present which was so kind) Then we did some shopping. Got pedicures. Stopped for a bevvy on the way home. The conversation flowed easily all day! After I dropped her off around 6, I met up with my guys at the local Mexican joint and got dinner. Then I realized she left her water bottle in my car so I was going to drop it off on my way home and she was like the boys are out playing, bring Knox over. So we all hung out for another hour or so.

Cole just headed out to get drinks with a friend for his birthday. I'm putting the small one to bed and then reading!! Happy to be home. Happy we have no plans tomorrow.

[suckitsurveys]

Yesterday

1) What was the weather like? Did it change your plans in any way? It was in the mid 70s and breezy, which was really nice because Monday and Tuesday were REALLY hot. There was a big storm the night before which cooled things off.

2) What did you do yesterday, anyway? I worked and we had a company picnic and then I went and got my nails done and then went out for sushi with two of my friends.

3) Did you eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner? What did you have? I had a banana and an english muffin with peanut butter for breakfast, a taco and some beans and rice and chips and guac for lunch at the aforementioned company picnic, and, as I also just mentioned, sushi for dinner.

4) Did you do some form of exercise? What? Nope.

5) Who did you spend the most time with? My coworkers, technically.

6) What television shows or movies did you watch? I didn’t watch anything yesterday.

7) What time did you get up and go to bed? I got up at 5am and went to bed about 10pm.

8) What was the best bit about yesterday? Sushi!!!!!!!!!!!! and being with my friends.

9) What about the worst? All the bs I had to deal with at work before the picnic.

10) Did you talk to anyone on the phone? Who? Why? Yeah, a couple work related calls and then the mechanic called me about my car and then I called my dad to let him know about it and then I called Randal when I got to his place to pick him up and then I called my husband on my way home.

Today

1) What time did you get up? 5am.

2) What are your plans for today? Working and then I have to drive my dad to the doctor and then I’ll have dinner with Mark. I also need to order the decor for my niece’s birthday party.

3) Have you eaten any meals yet? What did you have? I had an english muffin with peanut butter and i’m about to have lunch.

4) Are you planning on seeing your friends or boyfriend/girlfriend? I’m seeing my husband but I also live with him, so.

5) Does your favorite television show air today? Nope.

6) Have you spoken to your parents yet? Not yet.

7) How many texts have you received? A handful from Lolly and Mark.

8) Are you planning on going to bed early? I should but I never do.

9) Have you done anything remotely productive today? Yes I’ve gotten a lot of work done today.

10) How much money did you spend so far? Are you planning on spending more later? None yet, technically. I did pay off the credit card bill but I wouldn’t call that “spending” money. I might order my niece’s party decor in a bit though.

Tomorrow

1) What time do you have to get up tomorrow? 5am.

2) What do you hope the weather will be like? The same it is now is fine.

3) Is there anything you’re dreading about tomorrow? Work.

4) Is there anything important you need to do, or can you just relax? I have to work.

5) Do you have plans to see your friends? Not as of right now.

6) What do you hope will happen tomorrow? I hope we get pizza for me and my bosses birthdays since they both fall over the weekend.

7) Are you going to wake up at home, or somewhere else? At home.

8) If you don’t have any plans, what do you think you’ll end up doing? I’ll be working. Maybe Mark and I will have a fire to celebrate the end of the week/an early birthday thing for me.

9) Do you have to get a work out in at some point? I SHOULD but I’m “restarting” on Tuesday so I can actually get a routine together.

10) Will you be working or studying at all? Yes, working.

[xxwiltedwisteriaxx]

SO CLOSE.

I almost didn’t eat today. Everything was going well but i forgot that i’m like.. RLLY bad at hiding shit and RLLY good at complaining. So subconsciously i text my fiancé “omfg I’m ⭐️VING and this lady (a college spokesperson) won’t SHUT UP”

Then he caught me in my lie from earlier telling him i had a good brekkie, and also dug out of me that i had i had no lunch either. my excuse was “idk i jst haven’t gotten out of bed” SO, he ordered me sonic and had it doordashed to me.. (he’s in the military so he can’t jst.. go get it)

I could never be mad at him, especially not for caring about me. It was a cheeseburger, a small chili cheese tots, and a small cookie dough shake. I spent probably like fifteen minutes calculating calories until i got to 1,300 and decided just to eat the damn meal. Again, I could never be mad at my fiancé for caring about me, but DAMN.

On one hand, Im super fucking disappointed that i made it until 16:30, then broke my fast. On the other hand… ig if you REALLY put it in perspective, i had like a normal amount of calories a person should have. I jst omad-ed. I plan to fast tomorrow for my birthday (Im finally ACTUALLY 18 WOO!! No more lying on social media!! :3) and for most of the day friday since my mom will be taking my brother and i out to some fancy shmancy sushi place.

How I felt after eating:

Jst writing this as a reminder to myself.

Being hungry sucked ass, we all know this. It made me nauseous and irritable, but it felt so good to say no to my cravings. After eating i felt like crap, sure my belly is full and i’m no longer having cravings, but every bite put me deeper and deeper into shame thinking “how tf am i gonna write abt this?” But wtv, im choosing not to care today bc it’s already done with.

In all honesty, I try telling myself i feel this way for public approval, and some of that might actually be true, but really i jst want control.

But who cares, it’s only one day, and one day further away from reaching my ugw.

[myf00djournal]

How good is progress? Chip chip chip away.

My watch went a bit haywire at the beginning, missed the start apparently, and the entire run whenever I looked it kept showing inaccurate splits. At one point it said 6:15 but clearly none of them were. It made me push because I thought I was running behind pace 😤 So bizarre. That’s Apple for you lol. My Runna membership is in lieu of getting a Garmin but unfortunately they don’t have a feature that paced you through “race day” it’s just training plans. They said that feature is coming though so fingers crossed 🤞🏽

Very proud of my efforts especially over the last 6 weeks but that work started about a year ago 🙏🏽 🏃🏽‍♀️ I just completely believe in myself now. It is so daunting looking back. This time last year I was still chasing my 2022 goal of going under 30. Once everything clicks it’s just magic 🪄

I haven’t been posting my whole day lately. I just took a break. I still tracked on some days but I’m feeling like I had a good understanding of my routine foods lately and didn’t need to input everything.

My week has felt pretty consistent. I did strength training 4x, and after tomorrow will have run 22.5km in total. I felt tired though because we had a shutdown period at work and I WFH. It felt very tiring to go back 🙃

I did my easy run on Tuesday but skipped a 7km progressive run on Thursday because it was 40 degrees here 🥵 I’m running my 11km long run tomorrow with my mate around the river so I’m excited for a change of scenery and some company. Next week is a deload week as it’s halfway through the program and I am keeeeeeen.

Today after parky I just got a coffee ☕️ . I had had Nutrigrain before I ran, just a small portion. I usually have half an English muffin but we ran out.

Came home and did uni work 📚 as my semester started this week.

Went to our fave sushi 🍣 place for lunch. I love my wagyu beef, prawn nigiri, katsu 🤤, 🐙 had about six plates. Then checked out JB and got one of those 14 in 1 air fryers and slow cookers all of that jazz. Josh had been eyeing it off for months and my family gave him a voucher for his birthday. Cute.

Then we got bubble tea because that’s our new Saturday thing. I tried a rose green tea. Tasty.

And then I did a uni reading and napped 🥰

Josh is currently cooking up a chicken korma with basmati and naan that I am stoked for. Get in my belly.

We have leftover lemon meringue cake from the birthdays last night so will also get into that 🤭 generous servings to fuel me up!

I hope everyone had a nice week and is enjoying their weekend 🫶🏽

[getittogetherk]

September 1, 2024

The first day of September, and a Sunday.

I'm not really sure why I haven't been journaling as much. I wonder if it's because life has calmed down somewhat. i currently have no crush, no awful work drama, and no dog to foster/dogsit.

this weekend (i'll start from yesterday) has been pretty chill but also pretty productive.

saturday, i met up with lana, sov, and matt k at a pickleball court in altadena. we were awful, me especially, but we had a good time playing pickleball. afterward, matt and i got brunch at a cute spot in altadena, and i went home for a bit before heading out again for volunteering at the VBA's, half poop patrol, and half socializing.

This morning church was out of session as it's Labor Day weekend and i met up at the VBAs again, this time to join the "Happy Tails" hike, where I carried water bottles, filled doggy water bowls, and scooped up 4 large poops. it was nice to be out hiking, taking in some Burbank views, chatting with people, and seeing how happy the dogs were to be out of the kennel.

the rest of today has so far been pretty chill. I did some dishes, took out some trash and recycling, put up the new blinds and threw out the old ones, and took out some of marilyn's yard waste. i also watched some Brooklyn 99, which has been really funny and I've found myself on two separate occasions literally booming with laughter, even though i only half-watch as I play dumb games on my phone at the same time.

other things that have brought me a sense of joy/peace: listening to music i liked earlier. a newfound "discovery" and appreciation of kim gun mo. back to listening to The Read podcast and during a walk, which I haven't taken in a long time. reading. currently reading Love in the Time of Cholera and The 7 Habits of Highly Effective people alternately.

i just feel calmer, less desperate. i'm not texting grace y constantly to see how she is, in a sense, to see how "we" are. i don't go to BJ's as often to drink and stare at the waitress who i will never date or have anything to do with. i eat fewer pounds of pasta at one time, and today, i've eaten on fruit and am planning on eating another. i've also been very recently watching less Youtube, whereas before i watched for literal hours a day and would fall asleep to it, mostly the "downfalls" of celebrities, whether real or of the youtube/tiktok variety.

this friday-monday i'll be going to portland with lana, and my birthday will be later in the month. i have currently no plans but will likely get sushi with lana, and treat myself to a massage, especially as my left shoulder has been especially stiff.

things feel weird with lorena, grace y, and especially ant, and i'm just about completely estranged from grace h at this point, but it's fine. it's not pulling at me today, although it was about two days ago. i'm trying to separate myself a bit from my feelings, and trying to have it have less of an affect on me.

tomorrow is the labor day holiday. i'm supposed to take a morning walk with my mom, and then LD will come over with her dog and we'll make firestarters for camping and then hang out for a bit, as kaelynn is likely out of town, having just started a job that puts her every week in san francisco.

on occasional i also read a book about Borderline Personality disorder to learn more about it and hopefully pick up some tools to not let it control me.

things i want to look into more in lieu of endless youtube: pickleball: rules and techniques yelp: engaging enough to get 2024 elite status things to do in portland

hoping this feeling lasts.

[ocean-anchored]

November 23, 23... continued

Saturday evening I went to Grape Fest with Sasha which was also really fun. It was super busy but we had a good time & some good laughs, I enjoy her company a lot, she's a good one. Sunday I went to a new church. I was a bit nervous but I'm glad I went. A girl my age sat beside me & we ended up talking afterwards, I asked if she needed prayer & we exchanged prayer requests & numbers. Later I met up with Daniel at Courtyard for a beer & then we went for nearly a 2 hour walk. It was pretty nice, he's really genuine & intentional. We had really great conversation about life & ended up getting pretty vulnerable. He's a good guy & I'm glad to have him as a friend. Monday I ended up going to Okotoks because Ed canceled our meetings. I told Danny I forgave him which was nice, we hugged it out & its in the past. This guy Braeden works there, I know he's just a young kid but damn he's nice to look at. I went to Anneriekes for late birthday dinner & visit with J. It was good but always all about Steve. It was nice to hear the update at least but man, it's like you try to keep her at arms length but after that night she's texted me like 5 times, sent me a bunch of stuff on IG it's just a lot. I feel bad but I just got to watch myself & my time. Tuesday night I went for sushi with Kamber - finally met up with her since like 3 months ago. I really love that girl too, she's so sweet & we always have such a great time. I'm really glad to have met her & our friendiversary is coming up too in January so I need to find that out. Yesterday I essentially got off for the week since it's US thanksgiving. I had a meeting & cleaned the house etc. Zack started texting me a bunch again. I really did plan to never talk to him again, but I was worried about him again... we ended up talking, went to nose hill & just had a brief talk. I could see it in his eyes. I understand his pain. I understand how much he doesn't want to live like this. It really saddens me. I stood my ground though & my boundary was clear. He knows if he does something again that I'm blocking his number 100% & he will never hear from me again. I think he gets it but who knows. I wonder why I do this. He's my kryptonite. He's that one person that could treat me horribly & I will always come back because I fell so hard. I find him so attractive that I can't not look at him. I hate it. I hate what he does to me, how he makes me feel. But I will keep my stance & I will protect myself. I deserve more & i deserve better, I know. Then Shane came over & we played some switch games. It was nice, chill. He bought me a vegas knights toque & signed Marchessau jersey. I was beside myself.. He does too much. He's too kind. I feel like I trust him but I don't want to hurt him & I know I'm in no place to be seeing anyone anyways, nor do I even want to. He's a good friend though, really does respect my boundaries which I appreciate. Anyways - that's all for now. Im heading out for dinner at the Keg and have a massage tomorrow morning. I'm becoming happier. I'm reading more, including an audio book. I'm spending more time on myself & my self care. Spending more time with nova going out, eating cleaner & have been exercising & working out a lot more, been essentially every day for just over a week now so I'm feeling pretty good again.

[now-we-say-c0ral]

July 16, 2023

He tried to talk to me but I wouldn't say more than 5 words to him. I kind of hate him? I just went to the gym today and played some games. I lazily spent the day doing nothing. He knew better to be in the same room as me so he was in the living room most of the time. I also know I couldn't let this go on forever. I still cooked lunch for us for tomorrow even though I'm mad. I'll talk to him tomorrow before we sleep.

July 15, 2023

Had a good night's sleep last night. This was the day that Eddie and I were supposed to have our movie date. It was supposed to be tomorrow but he has a stag do tonight and I'd imagine that he's going to come home at 4am in the morning and would be so drunk and couldn't really be fun at Sunday so we moved it to today. We had some of the Silvanas that was delivered yesterday which didn't taste like the actual thing but it wasn't so sweet that you'd eat like 4 in a row.

We arrived in Stratford at around 12pm and couldn't find a decent sushi place to chow so we ended up eating at Itsu. I had some sushi and he had some teriyaki chicken which were both good. We then bought some tickets to Insidious. He wasn't the kind to watch scary movies but since I wanted to watch it, he said yes even though he was scared. The movie was very scary. I screamed like three times in the cinema while people were just clenching their teeth trying not to shout. We then headed to the shops to find some clothes on sale. I didn't buy one but Eddie did.

While on the tube home I realized that we didn't have a single picture to remember this day. I told him that I was sad about it and he told me that it wasn't that special and we didn't really need to take a picture. I was taken aback by this. I wanted to hear, "That's fine, we could take some pictures on our next date." but instead he said what he said.

I went home mad and upset because he would take pictures with his friends even when they'd just go out and eat dinner which was nothing special too but with me he wouldn't? I realized that in our 7 months of dating it's always me who was always trying to have the both of us look forward to something, always the planner and always the one inviting him and not twice did I remember his doing this while when Farrah, his friend, will be having her birthday in Turkey this September, he was the one planning the getaway. I didn't have him plan something for me to look forward to except for that whole Turkey trip but he's going out of his way for his friend but I never got that from him. I was so furious when I realized this.

I was too upset with him to even talk to him. I spoiled the date but I'm thankful that I realized this. He will not like what I'm going to be saying to him the coming days. For now, I'll let my mood boil down first.

July 14, 2023

I was assigned today in orthopaedics with Ieron, Rosie, and Chelsea. Rose was supposed to be with me during the operation that I was going to do but my manager, Elli, just told her to watch over me and only interfere if I needed help. I told her that I'll just call her when I don't know what to do. I finished the operation and Rosie was very happy with my output. She was even shocked that the consultant who had a difficult demeanor thanked me after the operation. She even mentioned in the debrief that the new scrub nurses were very good and the team made a good effort together and she even mentioned my performance to my manager. I was so happy today to be able to do something good when I thought that I couldn't. Me and Eddie also went to gym together and ate at Kitchen 37. It was good. We also bought the KBL beans he wanted so he could make some KBL.

July 13, 2023

I was assigned today in Cardiac doing God knows what. I was just there to fill-in the staffing so that it appears that they have enough people doing the list but I am not trained to scrub or to circulate in any of the listed cases and there was a transplant plotted for the day. I felt useless because I have no idea what to do and I was just there as a bystander. They're all busy and I wanted to help but I don't know how and I didn't want to slow them down by showing me what to do. It was such a weird feeling but seeing the heart through the chest is such an experience. I would want to be trained to do the case but not be assigned in Cardiac because it just demands so much of your time, apparently. Went to the gym after.

July 12, 2023

I seriously cannot remember what happened. Gym, I guess?

July 11, 2023

I was off today. Played Pokemon Unite, Diablo, talked to Danica and my family, and went to the gym. I can't remember the rest of the day.

July 10, 2023

I was so stoked to work today but that proved to be wrong when I got to work. It's rather a weird time to work during the junior doctor strike because there are less cases that no junior doctors are assisting the consultants do surgeries but also surgeries are still happening. It's not that safe, if you ask me.

I was thinking that I'll be working in orthopaedics but I was assigned in emergency with Ate Elizabeth, Ieron, Katie and Rosie who's on a late shift. The one leading the list while Rosie was still not in the unit was ate Elizabeth. There were around 3 cases listed in the morning. A laparoscopic case, an LP, and suddenly a bronchoscopy. I had no experience in the two cases apart from the laparoscopy. We ended the shift doing most of the cases except the laparoscopy because the patient has had a scan prior and the result didn't define the need for surgery but having junior nurses and a supernumerary run the emergency list and the band 6 not coming until 10am is very unsafe. The next time that this'll happen I'll definitely not be happy enough that I'm going to say something about it. No gym today.

[noteguk]

a little while | kth | m

↳ inspired by the song “a little while” by yellow days. 

— summary; in which Taehyung realizes that he was wrong in thinking that being friends with benefits with you wouldn’t backfire. 

�� contents and warnings; angsty smut!!, pretty much pwp, taehyung is emotional, fwb au, Taehyung x reader, protected sex, dirty talk (honestly like one sentence), unrequited feelings, kind of soft sex :( taehyung is whipped and sad about it 

— words; 2k

— author’s note; I’ve been feeling kind of stuck with my other wips so I wrote this drabble to unwind :) idk if I plan to write more of it but who knows!!! My two functioning neurons are very unpredictable. 

That was supposed to be easy. 

That was all that Taehyung could think about: you two, whatever you had going on; that was supposed to be easy. It was the whole point of even starting something like that in the first place. It was the entire motive behind why anyone would ever accept a friend with benefits — no strings attached, no clingy calls, no emotional baggage. It was supposed to be a quick situation, convenient; Taehyung was supposed to see you every once in a while, maybe even forget about you, until he decided that he wanted to get his dick wet again. 

It was supposed to be easy. 

“Is this okay for you?” Taehyung asked, leaning a bit closer to your face. He loved staring at you like that: with your hair sprawled on the pillow and your pouty lips inviting him into a kiss. He had grown used to having you under him, and it had quickly become one of his favorite pastimes. “Want me to go faster?” 

You shifted around under him, your hands moving up to rest on his shoulders. “It’s alright, I like it slow too.” 

And he could only nod, because his mind was thinking too many things that he could not say. It was supposed to be fucking easy, but somewhere along the way, Taehyung had ruined everything. It was just a matter of time before the whole situation went up in flames and he managed to lose both his friend and what might just be the love of his life in one go. 

Because Taehyung had broken the first and most important rule of having a friend with benefits: whatever you do, don’t catch feelings. 

And now he was rocking into you slowly, sensually, actually making love to you instead of the way he usually fucked — fast, rough, with your loud moans filling his lungs until he found his high. It was ridiculous. He felt nauseous. 

Worst part was that he was almost sure you didn’t feel the same — and the “almost” was because there was a small fragment of hope inside his chest that really tried to convince him that he had a shot. That maybe the way you looked at him showed something beyond hunger and lust. Maybe you actually cared for him. Maybe you wanted more and you weren’t brave enough to tell him. 

“Actually, could you go a bit faster?” 

Your voice shot him straight back down into reality. Taehyung only nodded, mumbling something that not even he understood before burying his face on the crook of your neck and raising the speed of his thrusts. The world around him felt suffocating and confusing, not even your honeyed moans against his ear could raise his spirit. 

Still he tried to ground himself, his hands digging to your hips as he closed his eyes, focusing on the drag of your walls against his cock. The feeling was overwhelming, dizzying, earned a low groan from him as he continued to fuck you like you deserved to be fucked. Taehyung managed to pretend that everything was alright for exactly two minutes before you spoke up again. 

“God, that feels so good,” you cried out. His cock throbbed inside you at your words, his mind spinning at the sensation of you growing tighter. Taehyung was obsessed with you in every way, completely enthralled by how your body reacted to his, so eager to feel more. “Want you to kiss me, Tae.” 

You always asked that when you were getting close and Taehyung was always fast to do it. His lips were on yours before he could even think about it, his tongue crawling inside your mouth as he groaned against the kiss. God, he could make out with you forever, it wasn’t even a joke. 

Taehyung was absolutely whipped and that was a problem. 

He removed one hand from your hips and trailed it down your arm slowly, reaching your hand and intertwining his fingers in yours. He moaned against your mouth, feeling his orgasm building up on the base of his spine, and pressed your hand down on the mattress as he continued to bury himself inside you. 

“Tae,” you sobbed his name so beautifully that he swore he could cum right at that instant. “I’m so close.” 

“It’s okay, baby, you can let it go,” he said, his voice so deep that you felt it vibrating inside your chest. “I got you. Cum on my cock for me. Wanna feel you.”

And you did, because it was like the universe was mocking him about how perfect you could be. Taehyung groaned — both in pleasure and in frustration — as your pussy clenched around his aching cock, your thighs trembling on either side of his body while you cried out his name. It was a flawless melody composed just for him: your voice dancing in the air, the lewd sounds of your wetness as he continued to thrust in and out of you. 

Taehyung, just to top it all off, committed the huge mistake of actually making eye contact with you as you came down from your high. It suddenly was too much: your hooded eyes, your parted lips, the blissful expression that covered your features. You were too much. 

“Fuck, baby,” Taehyung cursed. He closed his eyes, paying full attention to his growing pleasure. “You’re so beautiful.” 

He didn’t really mean to confess that out loud, but you didn’t seem to mind. You smiled, that gorgeous, drowsy smile you always gave him after he had made you cum, and Taehyung swore he was in heaven. “Are you gonna cum?” You asked, earning an eager nod in return. His hair was a mess over his eyes, sweaty and disorganized, covering his gaze as he looked down to see where the two of you met. You were made for him, your pussy was made for him, and he couldn’t take that idea out of his mind. “It’s okay, Tae, you can cum.” 

Again, the universe was mocking him, because within a few seconds he was doing just that. Taehyung pressed his forehead against your shoulder and spilled himself inside the condom, wishing profusely — pretending, almost — that the latex barrier wasn’t there, and that he was filling you up with his cum instead, making you his. And that was enough to prolong his high a little further, his cock throbbing as he dove into that fantasy. 

But, eventually, it had to end. 

The silence that followed was thick and overbearing, but comfortable regardless. Most of the time it went like that: with the two of you basking in the afterglow of your orgasms, drowning in the heat of one another without saying a word. Taehyung did not know what went on inside your head, but he knew that he needed those few seconds of silence to reset his thoughts, to try and bury the emotions that ever so gradually started to build up. 

Basically, he had to take a moment to remind himself that he had absolutely no chance with you. 

You sighed deeply, your fingers diving into Taehyung’s soft locks. He had collapsed against your chest, trying to regain his breath and, at the gentle caresses of your fingers, you felt his heart leap inside his chest, pounding against your skin. 

“That was nice,” you said daintily. He only hummed in agreement, worried he would slip and say something he didn’t mean to. “I have to go, though.” 

Just like that, Taehyung felt like he just got stabbed in the fucking jugular. He whipped his head away from your chest faster than he could think (after all, he should’ve enjoyed a few extra seconds of boob time if he had the chance) and his mouth fell open for a moment before his words finally came out. “Don’t— Don’t you wanna stay the night?” 

If you thought that his plea was desperate, which it was, you didn’t let it show. You smiled, leaning back to you could shift into a seating position on the bed. The two of you were facing each other then, so close and yet miles apart. “I don’t think I have the energy for round three,” you answered playfully. 

Taehyung had two conflicting answers fighting in his head. The first one was that it wasn’t for sex, something along the lines of “actually, I might be in love with you and I don’t want you to go”; the second one was the one that you wanted to hear: “it’s okay, I’ll do all the work anyways”. And, yet, as the brave battle continued inside his mind, he was left to stare in silence as you jumped out of the bed and started seeking for your clothes.

“Besides,” you continued, “I have that research presentation tomorrow.” 

Oh yeah, that stupid research thing. The reason why you had to schedule that Emergency Unwinding Session with Taehyung in the first place. His initial bliss, but his final demise. How poetic. 

“It’s fine, I get it.” Taehyung watched your little wiggling dance as you placed your pants back on. He would’ve teased you about it if his heart wasn’t in absolute shambles. “Can I see you later tomorrow, then?” 

You didn’t even hesitate to twist the blade. “Won’t happen. It’s Yongsun’s birthday and we are going to this fancy sushi bar downtown,” you said. The universe truly hated Taehyung and you were completely dressed by the time you leaned in to place a kiss against his forehead. “But we’ll figure something out. I owe you a third round.” 

Taehyung forced out a laugh, trying to brush away the storm cloud over his head. However, he couldn’t even convince himself that he was fine. “Sure. We can figure it out.” 

You hummed and ran your fingers through your hair, trying to make it a bit more presentable. “I have the copy of the keys that Jimin gave me, so you don’t have to worry about locking the door. Just go to sleep and I’ll lock it on my way out.” 

Taehyung simply nodded because he seriously didn’t think he could say anything without completely confessing his emotions. They were so bottled up that he felt them building up in his throat, like a shaken bottle of soda about to explode. 

“See you, Tae. Thanks for tonight,” you said on your way out of his room. 

He responded with a timid, “See you,” that he was a hundred percent sure you didn’t even hear. A few seconds later, the sound of his front door closing was like thunder echoing around his empty room. 

Taehyung sighed and threw himself back against the mattress, covering his eyes with the palm of his hand. He was so fucked. So fucking whipped. He just wanted to scream against his pillow until it all went away, but he knew that it wouldn’t. He couldn’t confess to you because he was sure that you didn’t feel the same, and he couldn’t let you go because he was selfish: he wanted you one way or another, even if he had to disguise his emotions and pretend that everything was fine. 

He removed his hand from his face and stared up at the white ceiling, at the slices of moonlight that came from his open window. Taehyung decided that he would just continue faking that he was fine with the idea of being friends with benefits with you. But could he do it? Could he keep it up? For how long? Taehyung had endured those acting sessions for a bit too long then, and he didn’t know how much he could take before he reached his breaking point. 

He groaned and rolled around on the bed. He just wanted to sleep. 

That was supposed to be easy.

[introverted-sugar]

Ugh 😑

Heads up, this is a minor rant! Proceed with caution.

I feel like such a shit friend for what I’m about to express but I have to get this off of my chest because I have no one else to complain to. Also, I know I’m a great friend but I’m very particular about how I do things and I need to be at peace when I’m somewhere

So, my birthday is in a few days and I’m going to Miami/islamorada/key west for 10 days. I’ll be in Miami for 4 days with my girl best friend, and then “Travel daddy” the remainder of the trip.

So me and my best friend are similar in the sense of us being laid back and chill, we don’t do too much, when we go out we’re not twerking on table tops or fighting or any of that ratchet bullshit (now don’t get me wrong, you put the right song on and I’ll shake these cheeks but i just don’t like that type of attention, I sucked as a stripper 😂) But we are also VERY different. I like to try new things, eat at kind of fancy restaurants (if I’m paying, VERY fancy on a “mans” dime 💁🏽‍♀️) , I don’t like to go to clubs and if I do I’m definitely leaving early, lounge by the beach/pool, swim, snorkel, bike ride etc. So I’ve been trying to plan stuff for us to do but it’s hard because I have to take her into consideration (I’m used to traveling alone or with some man that’s trying to please me so I’m usually able to just do what I want )

Here is a list of grievances & concerns I have thus far:

1: She doesn’t really like sushi. Yes, that’s petty but I have dinner reservations the night of my birthday at a sushi place with a tasting menu. She said she was okay with going but eh idk, and then is she going to be cool with the price tag of the tasting menu? Any tasting I’ve ever done all the people at the table had to do the tasting menu

2: Piggy backing off of the first point, her sister is flying in the same day we are to help her friend that’s getting a BBL down there (😑, I’ll explain why I’m not a fan of her sister later) but we arrive at like 12, she’ll be arriving around 8 pm..the time I made reservations at the sushi spot. So earlier we were on the phone and she said “oh yeah such and such gets there around 8 I told her WE would come pick her up from the airport” Pause! WHO? Not I! I said “that’s the time our reservations are for” she was like “oh well she can just meet us there” 🤦🏽‍♀️ now remember I said I don’t do too much, I’m quiet and reserved. Her sister, not so much. She’s not about to embarrass me and she’s DEF not chilling at the hotel with her loud ass. My thing is, how tf you inviting people to MY birthday dinner. I honestly don’t wanna see her sister at all while we’re there, but I’m willing to meet her somewhere for an hour or so and then leave ✌🏽

(I don’t like her sister because the very first time I met her a couple years ago on NYE she basically got us involved in a literal BRAWL at a HOUSE PARTY in the heart of west philly of all places 😑 long story short the whole party beat her sisters ass for walking in and tAlking shit, and then Her sister stole someones whole car at the party, I guess when they were jumping her someone’s keys fell out of their pocket so she took the keys and figures out which car it belonged to and stole it, like it was just a ghetto ass mess)

3: She keeps asking me the same questions over and over. We have had this trip booked for MONTHS, literally, I like to be organized and plan shit out, but every week or so it’s “so where are we staying again” “how much is it” “do you think my hair will last if I get a frontal” to which I replied BITCH NEVER, just get braids or locs, of course she just got a sewin/frontal earlier…okay but I warned you sis😖. now mind you this will be her first time in Miami so she wasn’t really trying to pay the price (half) for the hotel I booked. I’ve been to Miami plenty of times on top of actually living there and there’s no better deal we’re going to get on south beach, with all the amenities that the hotel offers, I’m very good at planning and booking trips and finding the best deals so I was highly irritated when just a week before our trip shes tryna find cheaper places. I told her she can look but it needs to at least •be in south beach •be on collins/ocean drive and •have a pool (unless she could find an Airbnb). Y’all she sent me all these bullshit ass links to places in HOLLYWOOD (which I actually love but I said south beach…), Miami Gardens 🤮, and ft. Lauderdale and they didn’t have any amenities and were MORE money. In my head I was like “bruh nevermind we’re staying where we’re staying, you don’t need to do ANYMORE looking” 🙅🏽‍♀️

4: she doesn’t like the water or swimming. That’s the main reason I even go to Florida so often for the water, like literally. I’m not a fan of most beaches up north (Giants neck beach In CT Is awesome though, Maine has some nice ones too but it’s just so cold even on a very hot summer day, jersey has a few as well but mainly I like clear waters) So anyway, I wanted to book this snorkel/boat tour/key west tour but she doesn’t want to do it because 1: she doesn’t wanna snorkel but 2: we would have to leave at 6:30 am and she doesn’t get up until like 12 🙄 I feel like I’m limited as to what I can do

5: She still hasn’t sent me her half of the hotel fee and we leave Tuesday…it’s Saturday. She’s been saying “imma send it tomorrow” for like 2 weeks now and telling me about her car troubles

6: As I mentioned she wakes up late, which means she goes to bed late. The latest I go to bed is like 12 but when I’m on “vacation” I tend to drink more than I normally would so I go to sleep early. Shit when me and travel daddy went to all those vineyards I legit took naps mid day to keep up 😂 I’m worried she’s gonna keep me up like she did last month when I spent the night at her house, I was HIGHLY irritated and it was only one night

I’m seriously pondering why tf I thought this was a good idea. Lowkey I didn’t think it was a good idea but we’ve never traveled together and she’s never been to Miami (she’s the reason we’re even going to Miami because I’ve BEEN over Miami, it’s packed and overrated but I thought it would be a cute thing for us to do)

It doesn’t matter how cool you are with someone you have to have the right travel buddy and just because you get along doesn’t mean you should travel together. Sadly, I can already tell you this is our last trip together

The irony is I was sooo hesitant and complaining about going on the WPB trip but ended up having a blast, but we also had a huge villa and everyone had privacy, and I only personally knew one person so at first I didn’t feel super obligated to be all chummy with his friends, but I loved all of them they were so much fun and liked to do the stuff I like to do, it really was such a bomb trip I wish I could show you guys all the cute pics and videos we took, REALLY great vibes

I love my best friend to death but I’m so apprehensive about this trip. We don’t even chill that often on the regular, mainly because we’re both just busy or live kind of far from eachother but I’m that friend that loves you…from afar, every now and then she’ll drag me out to some lounge and I’m always ready to go early it’s just not my scene, I wanna be in bed damnit! 😩

Am I just being a brat? What do you guys think?

[thatsbucknasty]

she used to be mine (x) waitress au

summary: Inspired by the broadway musical. Y/N Beck is a pie baking force to be reckoned with. She’s pregnant with her lazy ass husband, Quentin Beck’s baby. As everything around her turns upside down, Doctor James Buchanan Barnes charms his way into her life.

pairing: Y/N x Bucky

tags are closed

chapter 10: I didn’t plan it

Two months pass and I realize it’s only a matter of weeks before I meet my baby girl. I’ve been working hard to save more money but I’m still not even close to the amount I’m gonna need for the birth AND the divorce. It’s been really hard to put my pride aside and accept the help my friends offer, I guess I’m used to being left to my own devices since I was very young. But I love my little family. Bucky and Sam drive me home every night after closing and Wanda has been bringing me gifts for the baby. Nat’s contact will be handling my divorce and she said they would give us a payment plan so that it won’t be so difficult to pay all at once. I still don’t understand how that’s gonna work but I trust her. She’s being very strange though, but Natasha’s one of those people who deal with issues on their own and compartmentalizes everything. Still, I’m worried about her. I guess I can’t judge her, we’re the same in that department.

Old Nick hasn’t been around much lately, says he’s taking care of his health. Guess my pies aren’t the healthiest meal for an eighty-something year old man. Maybe I should start adding more vegetables to my own diet, I’m creating life inside of me after all.

-

“Hey boys, what can I getcha?” Wanda flirts with Steve at the counter and Bucky laughs, he seems to be getting used to their corny, slightly inappropriate conversations.

“Oh I don’t know, sweetheart. What’s the special pie today?” Steve flirts back at her.

“Well, Y/N made her famous ‘Slutty brownie pie’ today and if you want, I could make it even sluttier-”

“Guys! Not in front of my salad, please!” Sam scolds them and Bucky’s just laughing at Steve’s red cheeks. Wanda rolls her eyes at him and motions Steve to follow her away from the group.

I come out of the kitchen ready to leave and see Steve and Wanda making out in the far corner of the counter, while Bucky and Sam talk about an AC/DC concert they both attended back when they didn’t know each other. Sam’s also taking care of his diet it seems, but Bucky’s stuffing his mouth with my brownie pie. I don’t actually understand how he can eat so much and still look absolutely stunning.

“Guys! Keep it in your pants. It’s movie night, we’re leaving!” I scold them and Steve’s blush has reached his ears and neck at this point.

“Thank you! I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who thinks those two are such horny teenagers”. Sam throws his hands in the air and hangs his apron, ready to go.

“I think they’re adorable, but I’m tired and hungry, and I don’t want any more pie today so let’s go, where’s Nat?” I look around trying to find the redhead.

“She said she needed to be alone tonight but she’ll be at the party tomorrow”. Wanda says and we share the same worried look on our eyes.

“Oh, okay. Shall we?”

We get to Bucky’s apartment and today’s pick is on Steve cause tomorrow’s his birthday. He chooses 1986’s Labyrinth. We order pizza and sushi and enjoy the magical spectacle on the screen.

I can’t stop thinking about my divorce and all the bills that are waiting for me in the future. Raising a child isn’t cheap. Bucky holds my hand at one point, under the blanket that we’re sharing. I guess he senses my worry and tries to make it go away. I’m glad he does. Lately I’ve just been letting myself fall for him because fighting against it it’s a lost cause. He’s the sweetest guy, brings me home safely anytime he’s able to, he cares about my friends and most importantly, he’s patient and doesn’t rush me to do anything I’m not ready to do. His parents raised him right, what’s a girl supposed to do?

-

Next day is organized chaos, thanks to Wanda and her frantic need for everything to be perfect. She really loves Steve and he’s a good guy. They deserve each other, truly.

Nat’s helping Sam hang decorations around Wanda’s backyard. It’s a mixture of 4th of July colors and Happy Birthday signs. We’re not doing the whole fireworks thing, since Wanda’s birthday present for Steve wouldn’t like the noise. But there’s a flatscreen set up to watch them on tv.

I’m in the kitchen, chopping some tomatoes for a pico de gallo I’m making. Bucky’s setting up the barbecue outside and I can see him from the window. He keeps messing it up and starting again, making the funniest, exasperated faces. I told him Steve could do it in no time but he insisted he’s the birthday boy and should just enjoy this day.

Speaking of Steve, he’s on his way. It ain’t a surprise party but we still wanted to set everything up before he got here.

-

We’re all enjoying the cool summer breeze, watching football on a projector Wanda set up in the backyard, we have hotdogs and guacamole and chips, the guys have beer which of course I can’t have, but Bucky was kind enough to make me an entire jug of pink lemonade just for me. I’m not really interested in the game, to be honest and my bladder is full so I separate myself from Buck and look around to realize Natasha isn’t here. Since this is not my house and I need to find the restroom I ask Wanda for some help instead and we enter the house together. 

She points me to the toilet and I open the door to find Nat and Sam wrapped around each other, half naked.

“OH MY GOD! What’s happening here?!” I immediately cover my eyes and close the door.

“Y/N, you’re okay? What is it? Don’t tell me you found a rat cause I hate them so much, Gosh I told Steve we should’ve done this at my place, is way cleaner”.

“I- I- no- um. It’s not a rat it’s a- um. I’m sorry-”

“Y/N! Let me explain-” Natasha comes out the restroom with her blouse half buttoned up, makeup almost completely ruined.

“I don’t- I don’t need you to expla- can somebody please lead me to another bathroom or something? I’m about to piss myself!”

“Sure, honey, let’s go”. Wanda grabs me, she apparently understands what’s going on, looking at Nat’s disheveled state and brings me upstairs to another room.

-

“What’s going on? I heard the girls yell”. Bucky enters the house and sees Sam and Nat cornered in the kitchen, looking like they’ve seen a ghost.

“Nothing, man. I think it’s time for me to leave. Say happy birthday to Steve for me”. Sam kisses Nat on the cheek and leaves the house.

“Wha- Natasha, are you okay?” Bucky stands there awkwardly, trying to break the tension.

“I’m fine, but the girls and I need to talk privately. Would you distract Steve for us? He doesn’t need to hear about this. Tell him we’re talking about pregnancy stuff with Y/N or something”.

“Oh-kay? Are you sure you’re alright though, you seem-”

“I’m fine, Bucky. Now go talk to Steve, he’s out there alone on his birthday”.

“Well, he looks fine! He’s watching the Patriots destroy the- Okay got it, see you later”. Bucky awkwardly scurries down to the kitchen and grabs a couple more beers and brings them outside.

-

“Knock-knock”. Natasha enters Steve’s bedroom and sees Wanda sitting on the bed.

“Hey”.

“Hey. Y/N still peeing?”

“I don’t think so. But I think she’s crying”.

“God she’s always so dramatic”.

“Hey! You should’ve told us! Do you know how worried about you we’ve been? We thought you were sick or something! Not wanting to hang out with us. We were supposed to plan a baby shower for her by now but you’ve been M.I.A.”.

“ I know, and I’m sorry”. Nat sighs and knocks on the bathroom door.

“Y/N, come out. We know you’re done so let’s go. We need to talk”.

-

I wipe my tears. I don’t know why I feel betrayed. Sam and Nat are my best friends, I should be happy for them. Damn hormones making me cry like a little baby every time something’s out of place.

“Hey”. I sniff and open the door to see Natasha rolling her eyes at me.

“Why the hell are you crying?”

“Oh I’m sorry for being a hormonal mess but seeing two of my best friends, one of them who’s married by the way, making out like horny teenagers would definitely cause me some distress!”

“Uh huh, and how is this any different to you and Bucky holding hands and making eyes at each other every single minute? May I remind you, you’re still married too!”

“Oh my God, Natasha, you did not! I’m getting a divorce, you know that!”

“Yeah, I know. And I understand and not make a fuss about it, until you decide to judge me for the exact same thing you’ve been doing!”

“Why- ah. Sorry, I know I’m looking like a complete hypocrite right now. It’s just- you guys are my friends and you’ve been acting so strange lately, it had me so worried and I feel like I could’ve been there for you, just as much as you’ve been there for me. You guys are my sisters”.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. But Sam and I wanted to figure out what we wanted first and you know how I am. I fall down the rabbit hole and I keep it to myself cause I’m too proud to admit I’m weak”.

“Natasha, please. You’re anything BUT weak. You’re the one who’s always showing us how strong we really are!” Wanda chimes in and holds both mine and Nat’s hands in hers.

“Okay girls, listen up, from now on we need to make a pact that whenever one of us starts to close off from each other, we will make an intervention for that person and keep ourselves accountable for our shitty ways to cope with men, and life, and money problems, and cleaning obsessions, is that clear?” Nat kisses the top of my head and Wanda laughs at her declaration.

Somehow I feel like everything’s about to change, hopefully for the better.

-

chapter 11: she used to be mine

[ist-das-kunst-oder-kann-das-weg]

How is it Friday already? That’s just highly unfair, a full week in uni usually last so much longer! Whatever.

Sunday evening was fun, watching the musical Jekyll and Hyde with @deneb-al-giedi (and her bringing my new favourite chocolate, hehe). Somewhen, I have to re-watch it. 

Meeting my study buddies for ice-cream on Tuesday was great too. B already invited us for her birthday to go eat ice-cream because she liked it that much. In the evening, I convinced my flatmate C to watch the musical Rudolf - Affaire Mayerling, which she already knew. She recently played the song “Mut zur Tat” (”Courage for Action”) from it to motivate me to do some boring task - and it worked! (Also guess who is playing Rudolf in the video...) I only knew that Rudolf would kill himself in the end, so I was pretty confused, because it’s a rather optimistic song. Because of this, I find that song funny now, ooops. (But it still motivates me to get some shit done, haha.) 

On Wednesday, my sister came to take one of my bikes. Because I am chaos incarnate, I didn’t check the bike beforehand and was certain some inflating the tyres and adjusting the saddle height would do the trick. When I fetched it, my perfectionism caught up with me and convinced me to also clean it, especially the chain. And oil it. And try to fix the front brake. Being lazy and chaotic, but also having a perfectionist streak is a bad combination -.- At least, that earned me my sisters appreceation. And she’s so excited and worried it’ll get stolen (it’s got a nice mint colour and is rather gaudy) or she’ll somehow ruin it. Seeing her like this is very cute. Even with my bad time planning, we managed to go to our favourite sushi place and also to the best gelateria in town. Yes, I am aware I eat to much ice-cream.

Yesterday, I invited A and J over for another film night. In the past, I would make sure to always go to other people’s places, because I didn’t want them in my space, partly just because, but mostly because my room used to be very dirty, way worse than just untidy. Seeing that it is now just looking very lived-in, I am happy to see I have come a long way. Whatever. The first film of the evening was Back to the Future, which J said was his favourite film. It was okay, at least I now know what people are talking about. Then Netflix recommended Go Trabi Go that we all had already seen. We only wanted to watch the beginning but we laughed so hard that we finished it. Go watch it, it is hilarious! The last film was Sunes sommar, a Swedish family comedy, which A wanted to watch again, as she is half-Swedish. Next time, when B is also there, I’ll make them watch one of my favourite films. Do you have any favourite movies and if so, which ones? 

Now I am off to the theatre to see the ballet Le Corsaire. I had heard they were looking for a few men to play sword fighting pirates. Man, that would have been awesome! But apparently, I am missing something essential for being an extra in that production. At least I can properly enjoy it from the audience. 

As you can see, I have a few tickets here and I really hope I don’t forget a show! Also I am trying out opera again, just because I got an abo. Before, opera hasn’t really been my cup of tea but I’ll see in time.

Tomorrow, I will travel to see my grandparents for the first time this year. Yeah. The year is half over, but rather late than never (and never has been very tangible for my grandfather...). I will take some stuff for studying with me because I really need to catch up!

[osakaso5]

Yamato Nikaido RabbiTube Rabbit TV Part 1: Spending Time With Yamato

Part 2 | Part 3

Staff: …Now, on to the RabbiTube project.

Staff: Our plan is to introduce the videos by featuring clips on NEXT Re:vale!

Staff: We’d really appreciate it if you could show a side of yourselves that people don’t usually get to see on TV. It’s a pleasure to be working with you!

Momo: We’ve got high hopes for you guys!

Yuki: Feel free to fully expose yourselves to the public.

Mitsuki Izumi: Ahaha, please be gentle with us! Looks like I’m gonna have to do a RabbiTube study marathon..!

Gaku Yaotome: By the way, Tenn, I saw you watching RabbiTube videos the other day. Do you know any good ones?

Tenn Kujo: …I was just watching cat videos.

Gaku Yaotome: Cats, huh. That’s not gonna help us learn anything.

Ryunosuke Tsunashi: …I think they might help! You could learn ways to entertain and soothe people…

Gaku Yaotome: Ryu, not all of us are gonna be able to do that…

Yuki: …I’m liking the idea of Kitty Gaku.

Tenn Kujo: …Pfft…

Gaku Yaotome: Tenn, why’re you laughing!?

Riku Nanase: Kitties..! So could it be like a video of Iori going into a cat café?

Iori Izumi: Why do I have to go to a cat café!?

Yamato Nikaido: I’m not too excited about making videos like that, either…

Tamaki Yotsuba: I wanna do a pudding tasting!

Sogo Osaka: …Personally, I’d like to rank my top 100 spices from all around the world…

Nagi Rokuya: And I shall hold a Cocona watch party!

Mitsuki Izumi: You guys aren’t bringing anything new to the table!

Iori Izumi: …Actually, I suppose animal videos do have their appeal, despite how banal they are…

Riku Nanase: Did you say something, Iori?

Iori Izumi: No, nothing.

Momo: Ahaha! Great, you’re already brainstorming ideas!

Momo: You’ve all got the right idea! We wanna see you act natural for your RabbiTubes!

Yuki: Let’s have a fun year doing this.

IDOLiSH7 & TRIGGER: Yessir!

- - - -

Riku Nanase: We’re going to be RabbiTubers for our birthday project this year..!

Sogo Osaka: All the group chats up until now were fun, so it’s kind of a shame that we won’t be doing one this year.

Mitsuki Izumi: …Fair enough. It’ll be awesome to make videos for our fans, but I wish we could have our own celebrations too!

Yamato Nikaido: It’s become kind of a tradition by now.

Nagi Rokuya: …We do not work together as much as we used to. Though I understand that it is difficult to match all our schedules…

Tamaki Yotsuba: Do we not get to eat Mikki’s cakes this year?

Mitsuki Izumi: The cakes are the one thing we’re gonna make for sure! Right, Iori!?

Iori Izumi: Yes. I’ll help, too.

Riku Nanase: Hmm… Celebrations…

Riku Nanase: Ah! Why don’t we all go somewhere together for our birthdays?

Riku Nanase: I guess we probably can’t all go… But we can get our manager to arrange it so at least some of us can hang out!

Mitsuki Izumi: Going out, huh… That does sound like a nice change of pace from all the group RabbitChats!

Yamato Nikaido: It’s a shame that we won’t all be able to go, but getting to choose a spot does make it feel more special. …You should take me to a beer brewery, by the way.

Mitsuki Izumi: Sounds like you’ve already got one in mind!

Tamaki Yotsuba: Let’s take lots of pics and videos for the guys who can’t go. We can send them over RabbitChat.

Nagi Rokuya: OH! A wonderful idea. It will make us all feel as if we are there.

Iori Izumi: I’m sure uploading them to Rabitter would make many people happy, as well.

Sogo Osaka: That sounds fun..! Let’s ask our manager about it tomorrow.

Riku Nanase: Yep! …Looks like we’re going to have pretty fun birthdays again!

- - - -

Nagi Rokuya: Yamato, Sogo! This is my first time doing pottery!

Nagi Rokuya: Though I have witnessed a posture similar to that of someone doing pottery in interviews and such...

Sogo Osaka: Politicians and commentators often pose like that for articles about them.

Sogo Osaka: Sometimes, it's almost like they really were told to mimic sitting at a pottery wheel.

Nagi Rokuya: Indeed. Many anime producers also pose like that for interviews.

Sogo Osaka: Interesting... I didn't know that technique had spread to the anime industry, as well...

Yamato Nikaido: ...Uh... Do I get to participate in this conversation yet?

Nagi Rokuya: But of course, Yamato! We are here for pottery!

Sogo Osaka: I'm sorry, I didn't mean to babble like that.

Yamato Nikaido: ...I thought our work here in Kyoto was done, so why are we at a pottery studio, exactly..?

Tsumugi Takanashi: This was the only day before your birthday that was open in all of your schedules!

Tsumugi Takanashi: We've got plenty of time before our train home leaves, and Sogo-san and Nagi-san wanted to sculpt tea cups for all of IDOLiSH7!

Nagi Rokuya: Ceramics are the essence of Japan. Show me your national spirit!

Yamato Nikaido: My national spirit...

Sogo Osaka: I thought it'd be nice if we could eat and drink from cups some of us made ourselves, even when we can't all be gathered around the same table.

Yamato Nikaido: ...I guess you've got a point there. Let's do this, then.

Yamato Nikaido: We'll save the brewery visit I'd been hoping for for some other day.

Nagi Rokuya: OH, there you go again...

Sogo Osaka: Yamato-san, you'll make four cups and bowls, while Nagi-kun and I will make three and bowls cups each.

Yamato Nikaido: Oh, okay then. Roger that.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Wait... Isn't that three sets too many?

Yamato Nikaido: You didn't think we'd forget you, our president, or Banri-san, did you? We'll make some for you guys, too.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Huh..?

Nagi Rokuya: YES! That way, we can all have yet another celebration.

Sogo Osaka: I hope you'll come visit us often.

Tsumugi Takanashi: ...T-thank you..! I didn't mean to make you work so hard for your own birthday, Yamato-san...

Yamato Nikaido: It's fine. All I need in return is that you use the cup I made, and maybe also cook me a something special in return.

Nagi Rokuya: Yamato, you are spoiling the mood.

Yamato Nikaido: Hey, even I need a reward sometimes.

Sogo Osaka: Ahaha...

Tsumugi Takanashi: I-I'll just be over here with the camera! Well then... let's begin!

Nagi, Yamato, & Sogo: Yeah..! 

- - - -

Yamato Nikaido: This is actually pretty difficult...

Sogo Osaka: It's hard to get the thickness right. I feel like the strength of my fingers is off somehow...

Nagi Rokuya: Look, Yamato and Sogo! Gaze upon these gentle curves!

Yamato Nikaido: Wait, you're making Cocona, not a tea cup!

Sogo Osaka: Y-you're incredible, Nagi-kun! How did you make those hearts..?

Nagi Rokuya: OH, this is a very basic sculpting technique. Allow me to show you.

Yamato Nikaido: I thought you'd be better at this sort of thing since you're so into DIY, Sou.

Sogo Osaka: I think I'll do better if someone shows me how it's done...

Nagi Rokuya: Sogo, you do it like this.

Sogo Osaka: Whoa... It's taking shape so quickly...

Yamato Nikaido: ...That's King Pudding, not a cup.

Nagi Rokuya: I shall leave the finishing touches to you.

Tsumugi Takanashi: They're a far cry from anything you could drink out of, but still very impressive..!

Nagi Rokuya: Feel free to take pictures, Tsumugi.

Tsumugi Takanashi: I am!

Sogo Osaka: I need to do this properly. It's important!

Yamato Nikaido: Just don't show any pictures of Sou's work to Tama.  

Tsumugi Takanashi: I already sent one to him..!

Yamato Nikaido: Damn, I was too late... My bad, Tama.

Yamato Nikaido: ...So why am I the only one taking this seriously, again?

Nagi Rokuya: I will put my Cocona in the kiln with the cups!

Sogo Osaka: And I'll put in my King Pudding...

Yamato Nikaido: Ugh... Hurry it up, then.

Tsumugi Takanashi: ...Ah, Yamato-san, are you starting to get the hang of it? Your cups are all nice and even, with just the right thickness and depth..!

Yamato Nikaido: Haha. Thanks. I've always had kind of a knack for this stuff.

Yamato Nikaido: How long do we have to keep these in the kiln for?

Tsumugi Takanashi: After they're done in the kiln, they still need to air dry... Which should take about a month or so, all in all! They'll mail the finished cups to us once they're done.

Yamato Nikaido: Well, at least we won't have to come back for them.

Sogo Osaka: We should think of what we'll have from these when they arrive.

Nagi Rokuya: Let us discuss it in our group chat afterwards.

Yamato Nikaido: I'd go with ochazuke, it seems like a safe enough choice.

Sogo Osaka: I thought you might suggest that. Great idea.

Nagi Rokuya: OH! I would like to have a bowl of sushi rice!

Yamato Nikaido: Ah, that one does sound nice, too... I'm starting to get hungry.

Sogo Osaka: Ahaha, same here! Let's buy some quick souvenirs for the guys and go straight home after that.

Nagi Rokuya: I look forward to selecting my lunch box at the train station.

Yamato Nikaido: You sure do take your time with that stuff.

Nagi Rokuya: Eating on the train was not a part of my country's culture, so I was very excited to find out about Japan's train lunches!

Yamato Nikaido: Yeah, I can see why. A can of beer goes well with those.

Sogo Osaka: And it's fun to see which sorts of lunches are sold in different regions.

Yamato Nikaido: Sure is.

- - - -

Yamato Nikaido: ...Time flies by when you're talking about food.

Nagi Rokuya: Sogo and I have made three sets each!

Sogo Osaka: How did you like doing pottery, Yamato-san?

Yamato Nikaido: Haha... In all honesty, it was a ton of fun. You picked this place because you knew I'm not into big and fancy stuff, right? Thanks.

Yamato Nikaido: We should bring the rest of the guys here sometime.

Sogo Osaka: We should!

Nagi Rokuya: YES!

Tsumugi Takanashi: Thank you all for showing me your pottery skills..! Let me just take one more picture of you!

Tsumugi Takanashi: Say cheese..!

End of Part 1.

Translator’s notes..? 

Rabbit TVs courtesy of @rabbit-library​

[bellaireland1981]

New Beginnings: CH 6

Characters: Andy Barber x Single Mom! Briella James (Named Reader), Jacob Barber, Ava James

Summary: Briella James is a HS teacher and has Jacob in her class. Jacob meets Briella’s 5 year old daughter and they form a bond. Andy is interested in Briella but her ex (and Ava’s dad) is becoming a problem!

Warnings: Mostly fluff, some angst, jerk of an ex that harasses Briella, kissing… will update in future chapters.

Word Count: 4084

A/N: I do Not own Andy Barber or Jacob Barber, they are fictional characters. I do not give permission for anyone to repost my work or translate it to another site. Reblogs always welcome!   This is my FIRST EVER attempt at writing for Andy…or any character, so be gentle!  THANK YOU to my friends for supporting me and encouraging me! I’m my own worst critic so I love their feedback! @denisemarieangelina @fluffymisha97 @jamielea81

Chapter 5     

Thankfully the rest of the week went pretty quickly. Friday morning, Ava was a ball of excited energy for dinner with Andy and Jacob. She wasn’t the only one. You couldn’t wait either.

Unfortunately, throughout the day you were inundated with texts and calls from your ex, which set you on edge. You managed to make it to your lunch before you broke down and actually called Andy. You planned to just leave a voicemail, as you were sure he was busy. You were happily surprised when he picked up.

“Hey, Sweetheart.” He said, “Are you on lunch? How’s your day going?”

“Yeah.” You said, “It’s much better now that I’m talking to you. I was just going to leave you a voicemail, but this is much better.”

“Everything ok?” He asked, concerned, “And unless I’m in court, I’ll always answer for you.”

“I’ve been getting a lot of texts and calls today from the ex.” You replied, shakily, “It’s just getting to me. It’s exhausting.”

“Forward me the messages,” he said, “I promise you, this will be over soon. In the meantime, we have tonight and tomorrow night together to look forward to.”

“That’s what’s getting me through.” You replied, “I can’t wait to see you. Ava is beyond excited as well.”

“Only a few more hours.” He said, “I can’t wait to see you and Ava either. How about you both come over at 4:30. Gives you time to get her picked up and I’ll leave work early and meet you at my house.”

“Sounds perfect.” You agreed. “I’ll let you get back to work, and I’ll see you soon.”

“I’ll see you soon.” He said, “And you can call me whenever you need to.”

The rest of the day went smoother. The calls and texts tapered down so you were at least able to focus. Once your last class was finished, you wrapped up some last minute emails to parents, then shut your laptop, grabbed your stuff and headed out of the building.

You got Ava picked up from school and headed home to change before going to Andy’s. Ava insisted on wearing her Elsa pajamas, even though you repeatedly told her it was not a sleepover.  One thing you were sure of, the child was headstrong.  You changed into jeans and a lighter weight sweater. It was starting to get cooler, especially at night.

You arrived at Andy’s and parked behind his black Audi. Getting out of your car, you made your way around to get Ava out and the two of you walked up to the front door. Andy was already there waiting with the door open, smiling at the two of you.

“Hi Andy!” Ava exclaimed, bounding up the step and throwing her arms around him. He hugged her back, smiling at you over her head.

“Hey, Princess.” He said, “I hope you’re hungry. We’ve got lots of pizza on the way, and enough snacks to rival the movie theater.”

“I’m starving.” she confirmed, beaming up at Andy. “Where’s Jacob?”

“Right here” He said, coming up behind his dad. “Come on, let’s steak out the best seats for the movie.” Jacob reaches for Ava’s hand, helping her into the house.

“Hey, Beautiful.” Andy said smiling at you, “Come here.” He gently pulled you up the step into the house and into his arms. You felt your whole body relax into his embrace. The stress of the week and everything with your ex melting away.

“That was exactly what I needed.” you said smiling up at him, “Thank you.”

“If I’m being honest, I needed it too,” He replied, “It was a long day. I was more than happy to leave it all behind. Come on, let’s go inside, I’ve got wine or beer. You’ve earned it.”

Andy led you into the house and to the kitchen. It was a very nice house from what you saw of it so far. It was definitely larger than yours. Surprisingly, it looked very homey, not the bachelor pad you were expecting with two males living there. Jacob and Ava were seated in what looked like oversized bean bag chairs on the living room floor flipping through Disney+, deciding on which movie to watch. It was cute that Jacob was patiently flipping through them all, even though everyone knew the choice would be Frozen.

You’d decided beer sounded better for the evening, especially with pizza coming. You and Andy sat at the island in the kitchen sipping your beer, enjoying each other’s company while you waited for dinner to arrive.

“I wasn’t sure where you’d like to go tomorrow night, but some of the other lawyers at the firm suggested the new sushi and steak restaurant KoFusion. I made reservations but we can always go somewhere else if you’d prefer.” Andy said, taking a sip of his beer.

“That sounds perfect.” You replied, smiling. “I’ve actually been wanting to try it, but Ava isn’t really open to trying sushi or steak.”

“I don’t think I would have been much for them either at her age.” He laughed, “Jake may eat steak now, but I doubt I’d ever get him to try sushi.”

“I was planning on making them a mini taco bar for dinner.” You said, “It’s easy to make.”

“I know Jake loves tacos so he’ll be happy.” He replies.

The doorbell rang, signaling dinner’s arrival. Andy grabbed the pizza and paid the delivery person, bringing the pizza back to the kitchen. We loaded up plates for everyone, grabbed drinks for the kids and brought it all to the living room.

“We’re going to watch Frozen!” Ava declared, “Jacob said they haven’t seen it yet!”

“We were just hoping to get to watch it with you, Princess Ava.” Andy said smiling and winking at Ava, while handing Jacob his pizza.

“Be careful, Monkey.” I told her, handing her a plate.

“Mommy, I want a Princess party this year for my birthday!” Ava said, “And I want Jacob and Andy to come to my party!”

“When is your birthday, Ava?” Jacob asked.

“November 6th!” Ava said excitedly, “And guess WHAT?”

“What?” Jacob humored her smiling.

“I’ll be 6 years old!” She replied, “Mommy said it’s special because it’s my golden birthday!”

“That is very special, Ava!” Andy said, “We’d love to come to your extra special princess party.”

“We’ll go get the invitations next week and fill them out so you can pass them out to your friends.” You told her, “

Jacob starte the movie and we all watched while eating our dinner. Once everyone was finished, you stacked the plates on the coffee table until the movie was over. Andy scooted closer to you on the couch, pulling you into him. His arm was round you and relaxed against him, enjoying just being with him.

Halfway through the movie, Andy paused it and declared it was ice cream sundae time. Everyone went to the kitchen and built their own sundae before carrying it back to the living room to resume the movie.

After the movie was over you helped Andy to carry all of the dishes to the kitchen. You offered to help him with the dishes but he said he’d have Jacob help later. Ava was starting to get sleepy, so you got her tucked into the car and said goodnight to both Andy and Jacob. You were definitely looking forward to your date the next night.

“Drive safe and text me when you get home.” Andy said leaning in to kiss you gently through the driver’s side window.

“I promise” you replied, smiling.

By the time you got home, Ava was fast asleep. It was a good thing she’d worn her pajamas afterall. You didn’t want to wake her enough to brush her teeth, you figured one night wouldn’t hurt. Thankfully, she was still light enough you were able to carry her into the house and get her tucked into her bed. Once you finished that you text Andy to let him know you made it home. You exchanged a few more texts back and forth and then you too, decided to call it a night.

You spend most of Saturday getting errands run and household chores you’d neglected over the week completed. Ava spent a few hours with your parents while you got everything done. They were used to getting to spend time together on the weekends. Later afternoon you swung by to pick her up so that you could go home and get ready for your date.

“She’s welcome to spend the night here if you want, Sweetheart.” Your mom said, “That way you don’t have to rush home from your date.”

“Jacob is coming to the house to hang out with her while Andy and I go out.” You replied, “Those two are thick as thieves already.”

“All we heard about today was Jacob and Andy.” Your mom said smiling, “I can’t wait to meet them. Just be careful, Bri. I’d hate for Ava to get attached just to get her heart broken. You too for that matter.”

“I wouldn’t let her get attached if I wasn’t sure about this, Momma.” You reassure her, “I know it seems fast, and really, it is, but the connection is there… and it’s strong. Wait until you meet them, you’ll see.”

“How about you bring them over Sunday for a family dinner.” Your mom suggests.

“I can ask him.” You replied, “If this Sunday doesn’t work, we can always schedule for next week.”

“Just let me know.” she said.

Ava came in with her jacket already on, bouncing in excitement.

“Come on Mommy! Andy and Jacob are coming over soon!” She said. She ran and gave your parents hugs, “Bye Nana and Papa! I love you!”

“I’ve ever seen her in such a hurry to leave us before.” Your dad pouted, “We’ve got competition now, Honey.”

“That we do.” Your mom laughed, “Have fun tonight Baby doll! You can tell me all about your fun night with Jacob tomorrow, ok?”

“I will! And Mommy can tell you about her date with Andy!”

“I can’t wait.” Your mom said, winking at you.

“Love you both” You said, “I’ll call you about dinner.”

“Have fun, Sweetheart,” She said,”I’m really happy you’re getting back out there.”

Ava was already in her seat and buckled when you got to the car. On the ride home you glanced in the rearview mirror to look at Ava and noticed the same car had been behind you for several blocks. You shrugged figuring it was nothing and continued on your way home.

Once you pulled into your driveway and parked, you got Ava out and the two of you headed inside. She immediately started setting up the living room for a movie and game night. Poor Jacob would be kept busy for sure.

You decided it made more sense to get the taco meat cooked up and veggies chopped before getting ready, so you got to work on that while Ava was setting up the living room. She finished before you and came into the kitchen while you were getting everything ready.

“Mommy, can I have a snack?” She asked.

“There are apple slices and grapes in the fridge,”You told her, “Grab a bowl and you can put some fruit in it.”

“OK!” She carefully grabbed one of her bowls from the cupboard on the island and went to the fridge.

Twenty minutes later, all of the food was prepped and the taco meat was finished. You settled Ava on your bed  with her tablet geared up to one of her learning games and you started looking through your closet to decide what to wear.

“Mommy,” Ava said looking up from her tablet, “You should wear the pretty blue dress you wore to Nana and Papa’s party. Andy wears blue lots, I think it’s his favorite.”

“You think so?” You asked, smiling, “I like that dress a lot too. I think I will wear it! Thank you my sweet Monkey!”

She beamed then went back to playing her game as you quickly changed into the dress. It was a short sleeved, chiffon fit and flare dress, simple yet elegant. Most importantly, it was comfortable so you wouldn’t be readjusting it all night. You chose the diamond pendant necklace your parents gave you when you graduated college, and a pair of silver drop earrings to match. Once you were dressed, you went into your bathroom and did your makeup. You decided to leave your hair down, but quickly took the curling iron to it give it a little bounce. Finally you were as ready as you were going to get.

Satisfied with the end result, you finally stepped out of the bathroom.

“You look pretty, Mommy!” Ava said, “Is it almost time for Jacob to come?”

“Almost!” You confirmed, “And thank you, Monkey. Let’s go downstairs, I need to check my phone.”

Ava made herself comfortable on the couch, while you went to your phone. You had several messages from your ex. You chose to ignore them for now. You didn’t want anything to ruin the night with Andy. You had one message from Andy, which you tapped to open.

Andy: We’re leaving now, be there shortly. See you soon. XX

You checked the time stamp and the current time and realized they’d be here any minute.

“Mommy! They’re HERE!” Ava exclaimed, launching herself off of the chair by the window where she’d apparently taken up watch.

“Give them a moment to get to the door, Monkey” You laughed, “Don’t go flying out of the house.”

You started to head to the door to open, but Ava flew past and beat you to the door. She remembered to look back and check that it was OK for her to open the door. Once you’d given permission she quickly pulled the door open. Andy and Jacob were just getting to the door.

“Hi Jacob!” she greeted him, happily, before launching herself at him to hug him. Jacob chuckled, bending down a bit to hug her back.

“Hey Ava!” He replied, “Ready to watch movies, eat junk food and stay up past your bedtime?”

“YES!” She confirmed, “Can you always be my babysitter? Not even Nana and Papa let me do all that!”

“I’m not sure you’re supposed to reveal your master plan while the parents are present, Jake.”  Andy laughed.

“Hi Andy!” Ava said, breaking away from Jacob to hug him, then looking at the button up dress shirt he wore, added, “I knew blue was your favorite color! I told Mommy  to wear the blue dress because she would be pretty and it was your favorite color!”

“Blue is my favorite color,” He confirmed smiling at her, then looking up at you, he said, “And your mommy looks beautiful.”

“Told you, Mommy!” Ava beamed, happy having helped you out.

“You did tell me, Monkey.” You replied smiling, then to Andy said, “You’re looking pretty handsome yourself.”

“Ok, Ava,” Jacob said, playfully rolling his eyes, “Let’s get away from these two.” The pair headed into the living room, Ava already chatting a mile a minute.

“Hey, Sweetheart.” Andy smiled, stepping into the house, and closing the door. He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you in close and dropping a quick kiss onto your lips.

“Hi.” You replied, smiling up at him, “Looks like we’ve learned how to clear the kids out of a room.”

“That’s going to be a handy skill to have.” He agreed, laughing. You both made your way into the living room where the kids were.

“Ok, the tacos are all ready to go, although you may want to reheat the meat. There are drinks in the fridge. Ava knows where all of the snacks are. Just make sure she isn’t bouncing off the walls from too much sugar.” You laugh, “There are emergency numbers on the fridge. If you need anything, just call or text.”

“We’ll be fine” Jacob assured you, “I’ve got this. You guys go have fun and don’t worry. We’ll be having too much fun here to even miss you.”

“I’m feeling the love here.” You teased him. “I know you’ll be fine, I’m not worried in the slightest.”

After hugging them both, they pretty much shoved you and Andy out of the house.

Once you arrived at the restaurant, Andy quickly came around and opened your door. He held your hand as the two of you made your way into the restaurant, only separating for him to open the door and then his hand landed on your back, gently guiding you into the building. Once inside, he took your hand in his own again.

You were seated at a semi-private table toward the back of the restaurant. Your waiter took your orders for drinks and then left you to look over the menu.

“This all looks amazing.” You said, “How is anyone supposed to make a decision?”

“I was thinking the same thing” he laughed, “How about we get a variety and we can try it all?”

“That’s a brilliant idea.” You agreed.

The waiter returned with your drinks and you placed your orders. You took a sip of the wine to help calm your nerves. You weren’t nervous around Andy, just being on a date after not dating for over 5 years was causing a little anxiety.

“I haven’t been on a first date since college.” Andy said, as if reading your thoughts. “I have to say, this one is already far better.”

“I haven’t been on any date of any kind since before Ava was born.” You replied, “But I can say with certainty that this one is already better than any date I’d been on before that.”

“Here’s to many more dates together.” Andy said, raising his glass to you. You raised yours toasting.

“And possibly to last first dates.” You said, smiling.

“I’ll definitely drink to that.” He agreed, smiling back at you.

“Ava spent the morning with my parents while I was running errands and according to them she didn’t stop talking about you and Jacob.” You told him. “They offered to keep her tonight but she wasn’t trying to miss out on time with Jacob.”

“I think Jake would have been bummed to miss out on time with Ava too.” Andy said, “I think he really likes having someone look up to him.”

“They’re good for each other.” You agreed, “My mom invited you and Jacob to dinner tomorrow, I told her I’d pass along the invite. It feels weird to say that on a first date. You don’t have to accept, I know it’s really soon.”

“We’d love to.” Andy reassured you, “It might be soon by others’ standards, but I’ve had enough of living by others’ standards. I think we just need to do this our own way.”

“I like the sound of that.” You agree, “We can make our own standard.”

The waiter brought the dishes to the table. You and Andy enjoyed the variety of sushi, trying different kinds. Conversation continued to flow during dinner. It honestly felt like you’d been on many dates by the time you were finished eating.

“I don’t think our kids want us home yet, and I’m not ready for this date to end.” Andy said, “Do you want to go for a walk by the lake?”

“I’d love to.” You said, “I’m not ready to go home yet either.”

After paying the bill, Andy leads you out to where the car is parked. He opens your door for you, and you slide into the passenger seat. He quickly walks around to the driver’s side and gets in. The drive to the lake doesn’t take long and being pretty deserted, it’s easy to find parking. Andy once again comes around to open your door and offers his hand to help you out of the car.

You’re glad you thought to grab the lightweight sweater to wear with your dress. It provides enough cover to where you’re not going to get cold while enjoying time with Andy.

You make your way to the path that leads along the lake, Andy taking your hand in his, your fingers intertwining.

“I’m really enjoying the milder fall weather this year.” You said, “It’s been really nice to be able to be outside longer. I’m hoping it holds through Ava’s birthday before it gets cold.”

“I imagine it would be easier to hold the party outside as opposed to all of those kids inside the house.” He chuckled, “I’ve really loved the weather being so mild too. It allows me to go for walks by a lake with a beautiful woman.”

“Smooth, Mr. Barber.” You laughed, “And yes, holding the party outside would be much less of a headache.”

“I’m only stating facts, Sweetheart.” He smirked, “And whether the party is inside or out, Jake and I can help wrangle kids.”

“That would be most helpful.” You said, smiling.

The two of you continued to walk along the path, stopping when you arrived at a pier. Andy led you to the end where there was a bench and you both sat down, close to one another. He wrapped his arm around you, pulling you in close, and you relaxed into his side.

“I haven’t been this happy or relaxed in a long time.” Andy admitted. “Even before everything exploded with Jake and then after...with the accident… I wasn’t happy. I was trying. I wanted to be happy and to want the life we had, but it felt too forced. I can’t remember the last time I was happy. Meeting you and getting to know you better, has changed everything. I don’t know if I deserve to be happy, but I’m going to hold on to this.”

“You deserve to be happy, Andy.” You said, turning slightly so you could look into his eyes. “I thought I was happy with my ex, I thought I wanted to marry him, but once he walked out when I got pregnant, I realized that I wasn’t actually happy with him. I don’t know that I ever really loved him. Being with you though, makes me happy.”

His hand comes up to cup your face, his head lowering to yours. His lips connected with your own, his beard rubbing against your face. His tongue licked at the seam of your lips, asking for entry. You allowed him access, your own tongue snaking out to meet his. The kiss deepened, he pulled you closer into him, your arms wound around his middle. You continued to kiss until you finally had to break apart for air. His hand stayed cupping your face, his thumb brushing against your kiss swollen lips.

“Maybe we should have had your parents keep Ava,” Andy teased, his voice husky, “We could have continued this without a curfew.”

“Maybe next time,” You smiled, “Depriving Ava of Jacob wouldn’t have won you any points.”

“I wouldn’t want that.” He agreed, “I need her on my side.”

“I think you’re good on that front.” You assured him.

“As much as I would love to stay out here with you, we should probably start to head back.” Andy said, reluctantly.

“We probably should.” You agreed.

You walked back towards his car hand in hand. On the drive back to your house, Andy kept your hand in his own, driving one handed.

Once you arrived back at your house, Andy parked and came around to you. This time when he helped you out of the car, he pulled you into him and kissed you again.

“I can definitely get used to that.” You said, smiling.

“Me too.” He said. “Shall we head in to see what the kids are up to?”

You nodded, turning to head to the front door. As you turned, movement caught your eye on the street. You turned your head to investigate and felt your stomach drop. In the street light, you were able to see the same car that you’d thought had been following you yesterday. With the light, you were able to see the driver.

“Andy” You said shakily, “It’s him. That’s my ex in the car.”

“Are you sure?” He asked, turning quickly to see the driver before he drove off down the street.

“Yes.” You confirmed, “I think he followed me yesterday too.”

“Let’s go inside.” He said, guiding you up to the door.

@nickysurfer28  @waywardodysseys​ @thesecretlifeofdaydreamss​