#( I’ll probably be lurking for the rest of the night and then write either tomorrow or Saturday depending on how things go )

[blossomhcir]

// I think I have it in my rules but my discord is available to mutuals! If you prefer to talk there I’m more than happy to share my user or add you!

[wille-zarr]

The Mandalorian: “I’ll Tie You Up, Princess”

In Fields of White ~ Chapter Ten ~ “I’ll Tie You Up, Princess”

masterlist / previous chapter / next chapter

pairing: din djarin (the mandalorian) x f!reader

warnings: rated M for language; canon-level violence; angst; brief discussion of hunger/starvation; themes of parent/child separation; discussion of pregnancy; flirty rough-housing; character death

word count: 15.3k

chapter summary: when a dreaded face from your past emerges, everything in your new life, including your relationship with the mandalorian, is put under threat.

story summary: fleeing from the life you wish more than anything to forget, you are left to navigate the galaxy alone as a wide-eyed wanderer. in the process of evading the dangers linked to your previous life, your destiny is forever altered when you cross paths with an intimidating mandalorian and his unusually gifted child.

a/n: I’m really, really nervous for this one. 🙃Please read using the Ao3 link below if the length causes your app to crash! Also, MAJOR THANKS TO @sana-katarn​ WHO WAS A HUGE HELP.

also found on: Ao3

In Fields of White

Chapter Ten: “I’ll Tie You Up, Princess”

If Grandpa was alive to see this mess, he’d roll over and die again.

No.

No-

He’d find Thall.

Kill him.

Then die again.

“Stars,” you groan, leaning both palms on either side of the sink. Lifting your head, you glare at the face staring back at you from the refresher mirror.

Your face… it feels like it’s all you recognize of yourself these days…

You grit your teeth as shame weighs your eyes low, down your bare body, down to the speckled floor beneath your toes. You wiggle them to ground yourself- to reign in the disgrace squeezing at your chest.

…Dank Ferrik.

You press your eyes against the voice pushing, pushing at your consciousness.

…

I told you so…

I know, Grandpa.

I told you Thall was sketchy.

I know! Maker! Do you have to rub it in, Gramps?

Just wanted to point it out. And don’t call me Gramps. Makes me feel ancient.

Kark off. You’re dead.

…

I love you, Grandpa.

….

Kriff.

No one warned you that the worst part of growing up would be the realization your family was blasted correct about a lot of blasted things.

Hissing through your teeth, you fling your hand through the current of water flowing from the faucet, the droplets glittering across the reflected crown of your head.

Oh, fine. Fine!

You twist away- hand snapping up your shirt from the floor.

You’re used to everything going wrong. What’s new?

Another day, another “you’ll maybe possibly probably die.” Only this time, everyone’s survival rests upon you.

Big karkin’ yay.

If you survive this, you’re writing a book.

“Thall, how about you just kiss my- erf!-” the collar of your shirt catches your nose- “kiss my butt!” You yank on the edge of the hem until your head pops free.

“Just kark off-” you mash on the control panel, and the door opens with a snap- “straight to- YIPES!”

You fling backwards.

“GET OUT!”

Face exploding with warmth, you press behind the door. “What the hell! Can’t you knock?! I’m in my underwear, for Maker’s sake!”

Your shrieks are met with silence… so you peer around the corner…

Your wide eyes are greeted by the back of your Mandalorian intruder, the ends of his cape still twirling around at his heels from his own startled spin.

“Din, get OUT!” you hiss, ducking back behind the frame. You pull on the ends of your shirt, fighting to cover the bare skin of your thighs.

A strained, modulated groan slips around the doorframe.

“….d…r -s unl-ked.”

“What!?” you squeak, head ducking around to gawk at him. “Stop garbling, Djarin! I can’t-”

“Your door was unlocked!”

His words are sharp, strained.

“Anyone c-could have come in while you were showering and- and-”

“-Go away!”

You pat around the refresher counter, fingers gripping the closest thing within reach, and you hurl it-

“Out!”

“I can’t- Ka’r’ika! Is-… fresher paper?”

You bend around the door, watching as his gloved hands pick at the ribbon of white paper trailing across his shoulder.

You can’t help but grin.

“You look like shit, Mando.”

“Damn it, girl,” he grumbles, so low you’re sure you weren’t meant to hear it. “Can- can I… Dank Ferrik. Can I turn around now?”

“Blast it- no! Go away! I’m in my underwear!”

“What are you wearing underwear for-”

“Why am I wearing underwear? Did you really just-”

“I- I didn’t mean-”

“Some of us sleep in our underwear, Din! Gosh! What- do you sleep in your armor or something?”

...

“Oh my Maker. You sleep in your armor.”

...

“…No.”

...

A smirk quirks at the corner of your mouth, and you’re grateful he cannot relax at its sight. Stars, you take too much pleasure in making him squirm…

“Y-you’re not staying in here alone-” his voice strains- “not with hunters-”

“I’m safe-”

“-get in the bed.”

…

You blink.

…

His hands rise to his waist.

“Get in the bed.”

“Hmf.” You purse your lips. “Yes, karkin’ sir.”

Sticking your tongue out for good measure, you spin on your heel to sweep your pants up from the floor.

“Gosh,” you grumble, sticking a leg in as you hop one-legged towards the bed. You glance down at the print on your underwear. “I hope you didn’t get a good look- urg!” You lose your balance, slumping across the mattress.

 “Wouldn’t want this to be the way you find out I’m a horse girl…”

“What?”

“What?”

…

…

“…nothing.”

You hook the last button of your pants. “I guess you’re free to spin around now.”

He hesitates- then turns at your words.

“Look at you,” you snort. “Creeping in that dark corner.” You slide both legs beneath the comforter, pulling it up to just beneath your chin. “I’ll never get any sleep if you lurk over there. I’ll wreck my bike tomorrow, and it’ll be all your fault.”

…

Heavy sigh.

The Mandalorian emerges from the shadow-shrouded corner, and he flicks his fingers out at his side.

“Better?”

“Hmf, fine.”

You crinkle your nose.

“You can stay, but don’t stare at me all night like some dang rakghoul-” you scooch forward, pulling the comforter up over your head like a scarf, only your face visible- “trying to scare me.”

-a puff of modulated air.

“You’re not afraid of anything.”

The Mandalorian lumbers forward, fingers hooked on his belt.

“And that’s what concerns me.”

He pauses right beside your head, visor angled down to stare into your eyes.

“Come now, Mando. You scared the shit out of me on Taek.” You dramatically flop out flat across the bed, letting the comforter crumble around your body. “Thought for sure you’d kill me for being annoying.”

…

“You were afraid of me?”

You let your weak smile speak for itself.

“Hmf.”

He re-hooks his fingers on his belt.

“Could have fooled me-” his voice is light, teasing- “you were a mouthy little thing.”

Mouthy.

Mouthy??

Oh, you can show him mouthy-

You part your lips to snot off at Din, but his hand extends, pats the crumpled comforter, ripping your response straight from your mouth. You watch, brow quirked, as he pulls, smooths out the comforter around you. His visor lifts-

Oh.

Oh Maker just cast you in the Pit of Carkoon-

He can be so kriffing thoughtful and it’s really hot and you want to die-

Lowering your eyes, you grunt, picking at a loose thread to distract from that familiar squeeze, that ache in your chest.

Stop-

Stop.

You can’t get mixed up with this man-

You’re… you’re not able to-

…Someone’s going to get hurt.

…

“I… I- uh- talk a lot when I’m nervous.”

…

He tilts his head at that.

“Fine!” You throw a hand up, swallowing quickly. “... And- and when I’m not.”

“Hmm.”

“Still-” you jab a finger towards him, eager to just talk, distract yourself from that familiar warmth blooming in your chest- “I’d rather have been killed by you in the desert than spend another day on Taek.”

With a groan reminiscent of a wounded Kath Hound, you roll over onto your stomach- away from the Mandalorian.

“Kriff, so many sand stingers!”

A second roll, this time pulling the comforter along with you.

“And you can’t even eat them!”

A third roll.

“And I would know.”

A fourth roll- you stop, satisfied with the level of burrito-wrapping you’ve achieved.

“I tried.”

The Mandalorian has the audacity to chuckle.

“My lips were swollen for two days-” you wiggle, freeing your arms from their burrito prison- “and you laugh?”

“Ah.”

A small, strangled cough slips through the modulator.

“Sorry.”

You try your best to look angry- but you can’t resist the cheeky grin.

“Well, anyhow,” you sigh, re-crumpling the comforter around your body like a nesting mother bird. “Thank the Maker you flashed that Beskar of yours around like a baited hook, reeling me in like a fish.”

“Hmf.”

The Mandalorian leans forward, hands on his hips- his body casting a light shadow across your cheek.

“You would have found a way off without me.”

Rolling your eyes, you can only huff, “Yeah, blasted, right.”

You plunge your face, your grimace deep within your pillow.

“Blast it- I was so damn hungry; I was this close-” you lift up two fingers held closely together- “to resorting to cannibalism.” Your hand drops with a plop.

…

Truth be told… you have always wondered if Toydarian tastes like Nuna…

Heh.

…

-The bed jolts.

Your head shoots up.

You blink.

…

The Mandalorian-

-sitting beside you.

Close.

Very… close.

“Din?” Your hands fumble with the tangled comforter. “Wh-”

“I’m sorry.”

His tone is…

Angry.

He turns away from you, striking his fingers against his thigh armor in rapid succession.

Your eyelashes flutter, taken completely off-guard by his harsh admission.

“Uh…”

You sit up straight, eyes glued to the gleam of his helm.

“What exactly for?”

Oh, kark, what did he do?

Did you forget you should be mad about something?

“I should have taken you back to the Crest-” his shoulders shrug forward- “…the night we made our deal on Taek.”

The Mandalorian stops tapping- balls the comforter into his fist.

…

You blink.

…

“Maker, Din!”

Flopping back, you slap your hands across both eyes.

That’s it? Damn man is fretting over that?

With a dismissive flick of your hand, you can’t help but snicker. “Oh, come on, even if you had asked me to, I would have just written my obituary first- left it behind for the sand stingers.”

Grinning ear to ear, you, again, gather the comforter up over your head like a protective cocoon-

-just like the child does with his blanket, now that you think about it…

“I must say though, Mandalorian, you could have at least lugged off those two dead dudes you killed.” Crinkling your nose, you narrow your eyes at Din as he shifts, eases back against the wall, observing your movements with careful attention.

“Leaving me all alone with dead people-” you cluck your tongue- “very improper of you, Mr. Djarin.”

The Mandalorian tucks his head aside.

“You weren’t alone.”

“Yeah, no kidding!” The comforter slips forward, consuming your head entirely and entombing you in darkness. Pushing against the quilt, attempting to free yourself, you continue, “I- erf- had two decomposing-”

“-I stayed.”

Your hands drop.

…

“The entire night... on the roof.”

…

“Oh.”

Oh.

…

You sit in darkness.

…

The bed shifts, tilting you towards the movement-

The comforter is flung off your head, and your squint is met by your own face reflected in the Mandalorian’s visor.

“Are you still afraid of me?”

His words are tentative, but you hear their teasing edge.

Fine.

He wants to play.

You can handle “play.”

It’s easier than the truth.

…

“No, Mando.”

~Yes, Mando~

“I’m not.”

~I am~

“My terror for you was eradicated from my head the moment I was assaulted by the sight of your revolting bedroom quarters.”

~My terror is you’ll learn the truth about what I am~

“Your hair might be exceptionally soft and astoundingly fragrant, as your hair conditioner collection would imply-” you tap a finger atop his helmet- “but you’re messy, Din.”

~Seven Corellian hells, my life is messy oh my stars~

…

Silence.

…

“Hmm.”

His head jerks to the side.

“You’re welcome to clean it-” he shifts forward- “if it offends you.”

A smirk tickles at the corner of your mouth.

“I’d probably find something sentient growing in a dirty sock pile.”

The Mandalorian chuckles- a rumble… deep, low.

He leans forward-

-and you scuffle to the other side of the bed.

“S-Stars! Uh, well, enough about my fears. Um, tell me-” you let your feet dangle off the side of the bed opposite from him- “what scares a Mandalorian?”

Uhg.

You tried to force a light-hearted tone; pull on one of your phony masks- but…it seems the longer time goes on-

-the more it’s impossible to pretend with Din.

This… is bad.

Especially when you have as many damn secrets to keep as you do.

You can’t help but cringe.

Kriffin’ dune worm on a stick!

Cautiously, you sneak a quick glance over your shoulder, finding Din’s position on the bed unchanged. He stares down at his hands as if lost, buried within his own thoughts.

“I’m-”

He pauses.

…

“I’m afraid of making the wrong choices...”

…

“Not being strong enough to protect... who I care about.”

…

…

Your lips part.

Well.

…

A light-hearted question.

A serious answer.

You take a deep breath, letting it steady, refocus your spiraling, spinning mind.

“Din,” you mumble, throwing his name over your shoulder. “If… if this is about the baby...”

Stars, the baby.

…

Hell… you- you can’t have this conversation right now.

How do you-

Do you just-?

“The- the responsibility of a child-” you reach up; rub your browline with trembling fingers- “it’s the single most…”

You pause.

“Th-the single most-”

…

terrifying-

exhilarating-

rewarding-

punishing-

fulfilling-

painful-

you- you can’t breathe-

“Ka’r’ika?”

You jolt forward at your name.

“Ka’r’ika, are you-”

“Being a parent-” put on your mask put on your mask- “you feel so… big and so… small.”

Dank Ferrik…

“You’re too small to forge the galaxy you want for them, no matter how much you fight for it.”

Your hand slips beneath your shirt, clenching the pendent you wear close to your heart. “But you’re big, so big- you’re everything to them- their whole galaxy.”

Your eyes slide shut.

Her- her voice will come back to you if you just stay quiet and- and-

…

“Mama, what this for?”

Even your excruciating exhaustion can’t suppress your grin. “Your belly button?” With a grunt, you lift Valera up from the cot, placing her down atop your legs.

“Well, you little womp rat… uh…”

Stars, how do you explain this to a kid?

“It’s… uh… how you ate food when you were growing in my tummy.”

She shoots you an incredulous little eyebrow lift.

Oh great-

She’s already picking up your sass.

Serves you kriffin’ right.

Your fingers wrap around the pendant hanging from Valera’s neck.

“Watch the attitude, kid.”

You give the necklace a few short tugs, sending her into a fit of giggles.

“Mama!”

“Ka’r’ika?”

Oh!

You jerk around-

-Din.

“Is something… wrong?”

 “Yeah- uh, yeah.” You cough- clear your throat. “I just, dang it-” you slap your thigh- “get emotional thinking about little kids, ya know? So darned cute, the little monsters.”

He’s… not convinced.

But he doesn’t push it.

That’s… all you need from him right now.

“Look, Din. I- I know you’ll make the decision you think is right for the kid…” You lower your voice- make it easier to hide the waver. “It’s- it’s all we can do.”

...

“But you don’t… approve of my choice.”

No.

You don’t.

“I stand by everything I said before... mostly.” Your eyes lower, glaring down at the comforter. “Just make sure you aren’t making the choice to send him to a Jedi out of fear... fear of not being good enough for him.”

…

You glance back up.

“Because you are.”

...

“Ka’r’ika…”

So soft.

He always says it so soft-

“Your opinion…”

His visor dips away, almost bashfully.

“It means a lot to me.”

You blink.

“Really? Mine?”

It certainly didn’t feel that way during your argument on the Crest…

Sliding his fingers across the leather of his belt, he makes a slight choking sound.

“I… regret the things I said to you before.”

…

“I- you were saying things I didn’t want to hear...”

He turns, stares over at you.

“You’re not selfish.... far from it.”

You hold his gaze.

That damn daze.

…

“Well...” you mumble. “I shouldn’t have blown up on you either. I- I let my personal bias cloud my head and heat my tongue...”

You break the gaze.

“I’m sorry.”

“Me too.”

…

Silence.

…

Oh stars.

You shouldn’t do it.

…

You’re gunna do it.

“Well, Mando-” energy floods your voice- “I’m flattered you hunted me down and killed a Rancor just to apologize to me.” Crawling beneath the comforter, you don’t fight the smirk cracking across your face

“Truly, Din, it means the galaxy to me.”

You scooch over further, further until-

“W-what are you-”

“Shut up.” You shove a hand into his side. “I’m trying to sleep.”

You lean against his arm, your head drooping down…

…

…

“Din.”

…

…

“Din.”

…

“Oh my gosh, kriffin’ relax, Din!”

You pull away from him. “Stop tensing! It’s like trying to sleep next to a blasted boulder!”

“It is not.”

“Loosen up!”

“I am loose.”

Oh.

You know how to loosen him up.

You jump up to your knees, staring him down.

“Hand. Now.”

…

The Mandalorian gawks at you. Or, at least, you imagine he’d be gawking if it weren’t for the, ya know, helmet.

“Din Djarin.”

You shove your open palm at him.

“Let me hold your damn hand.”

One breath-

…

Two breaths-

…

Three breaths-

His hand, warm and- kark!- so damn large, slips into your own.

“If I die tomorrow-” you give his hand a tight squeeze- “I want you to remember me like this.”

He grunts.

“Domineering and demanding?”

“You know I can hear you.” Rolling your eyes, you sigh dramatically, “As I was saying, remember me like this.” You squeeze his hand a second time-

He returns the squeeze-

“Maybe I’d rather remember the time you fell into that mud-hole on Arvala-” his free hand reaches out- tugs on your ear lobe- “and I had to pull you out while the kids laughed at us.”

You whack away his hand. “Oh, come on, Din-”

“Or maybe I’d rather remember the time you sang to the Blurgs.”

“I was bullied into tha-”

“Or the time you fell asleep in my shirt- drooled all over it.”

“Kriff off! I did not.” You yank on his hand, drawing him forward. “How would you even know?” You lean into him, squishing your nose to his visor.

“You never-

do-

your-

karking-

laundry.”

…

Din just chuckles.

Oh oh Maker his chuckle is so sexy and damn it damn it-

…

You’ve… you’ve got it bad.

Crinkling your nose, you pull away, sinking down- down- down into the comforter. “Well, you’re being mean to me. I’m going to bed.”

A… thought occurs.

…

Oh, Banthabreath.

Life is short. Do it.

“Din?”

Your eyes twist, staring up into his visor from where you lay on the bed. He watches; does not break the gaze as you reach out- grab his hand again. With a sharp tug, his glove slips right off, revealing- stars- that hand, those fingers that have haunted your daydreams since they first brushed across your lips.

Warm.

Callused.

Scarred.

Oh Maker.

If you’re losing it over a blasted hand and voice- a kneecap reveal would have you deceased.

You sigh.

“Din, tell me- uh…”

Naked skin dusts across your jaw- “Uh… Din?” -traces your earlobe- “Do- do you really plan to, uh…” -trails down your neck- “…s-stay all night?”

-his fingers pause at your collarbone.

…

“Yes.”

He resumes stroking his fingers slowly, languidly across your collarbone.

“Humor an old man, Ka’r’ika.”

You blink at him.

Old?

Huh.

Now that he mentions it…

“How old are you?” you blurt.

He freezes.

…

Oh, you just killed the mood, didn’t you?

…

Dank Ferrik.

“I’m just curious.” You lift a brow, a slight smile upon your lips. “You do grunt and groan a lot.”

The Mandalorian makes a sharp noise- tears his hand away.

“Young enough to pull you out of mud holes.”

…

You narrow your eyes at him.

…

“…Late thirties.”

Ah.

“Sorry,” you chuckle, shoving against his shoulder. “Just trying to construct a mental image of how I think you might look.”

Din huffs- crosses his arms across his chest like a sullen child.

“I’d prefer you didn’t.”

“Come on, it’s not like I’ll ever see it!” You jump up to your knees. “I should at least be allowed to imagine.”

“I could never live up to your fanatical imagination, Ka’r’ika.”

“What, are ya ugly or something?”

“…No.”

“Are ya hot?”

“Hardly.”

“Oh my gosh don’t say that about yourself.”

“You’ve never seen my face,” he grumbles. “You don’t know what I’m working with here.”

“Shut up.”

“The helmet is an improvement.”

“It is pretty sexy,” you laugh.

…

Silence.

Oh kriffing hells-

Did you just say-

Oh stars-

…

You hope you die tomorrow.

Shaking your head, you snort. “Fine. Whatever.”

-just change the topic change the topic-

“Uh, so, uh, tell me-” you lean in closer to him- “what does Ka’r’ika really mean? You can’t lie to me anymore- I know it doesn’t mean brat.”

“You’re right.”

He, too, leans forward-

“It means pain in the ass.”

“DIN DJARIN!”

The comforter launches over your head, plunging you into darkness. You kick and roll and yell- the comforter and sheets tangling up around you- but you can’t get free-

-because the kriffing metal idiot is holding it down.

“Let me OUT!” you shriek, kicking upwards with your feet. “I’m going to KILL YOU!”

Weight lifts from the comforter.

You fling it off, and your flaming eyes immediately turn towards-

“So, you’re going to kill me?”

Damn that smug voice!

Your hand shoots out, a sharp smack landing against his unarmored thigh.

“Ouch!”

“Eat. Banthashi- OOF!”

You’re catapulted backwards- heaved across the bed. You roll, landing up on all fours.

“Why YOU-”

“Go to sleep.”

-smack-

“DJARIN!”

You grip your ass.

“Did- did you just spank…?”

…

Oh.

Oh, it’s on now-

You fling up, firing yourself at his chest, bursting into shrieks as he easily knocks you aside.

“HEY!”

But the Mandalorian goes for you this time.

His hands grasp your hips, shoves you back behind him. You pounce again- wrap your limbs around his back- you’re yanked forward with an oof. You retaliate, jabbing your hand towards his exposed side- he grabs, stops you- but then-

His arms have you pinned- trapping you against the bed with his weight.

“G-give u-up now, bounty hunter!” You wriggle; his grip only tightens. “I-I’ve- erf- got you, Mando!”

He doesn’t move, doesn’t speak…. just… stares down at you.

“Yeah.”

He dips his helmet to the side.

"You’ve got me.”

…

You both burst into giggles.

“Hell, M-Mando!” you say, gasping for air between your giggles. “I’m- stars!- crying!”

"Hm.”

A light -pat- smacks against your thigh.

“Go to sleep.”

Your grin stretches ear-to-ear. “Yes, sir.”

…

Oh Maker, you’re really done for.

You quiet your laughter, shimmying back beneath the comforter, keenly aware that you might regret every bit of this impulsive behavior in the morning…

But for now?

You roll up against the Mandalorian, curling up against his side. You tuck your face-

Safe.

Safe.

Safe.

His hand drops to your shoulder- moves up- stops… a tickle against the back of your neck, his fingers tracing tiny circles…

“Ka’r’ika.”

"Mhm? What? Leave me alone.”

….

“It means… ‘Dear Star’.”

…

Oh-

Oh.

...

Oh shit.

“Sweet dreams… Ka’r’ika.”

----------------------------

“See you later, Babycakes.”

“Bye, Cara!”

“The hell-” you shoot Pablo an incredulous look- “Babycakes?”

“What?”

“Please don’t answer to that in public.”

“It’s too late,” Pablo sighs, turning your racing helmet over in his hands. “I’ve answered to it twice today.”

A small smirk tickles your lips.

“Then can I call you Sweetcheeks?”

“Oh, I think the hell not-”

“Fine,” you chuckle, taking a pinch of his cheek. “Sweetcheeks it is.”

“I hate you.”

A grin cracks your face. Hey now, if he can call you Sweetheart, you can call him Sweetcheeks.

It’s only fair.

With a heavy sigh, Pablo shoves the helmet back into your hands. “Well, guess it’s back up to Thall’s skybox for me. I- uh-” his hand shoots out, pats your shoulder- “…Don’t die.”

“Pablo, that’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me.” You press a hand to his chest. “I knew you cared.”

“Yeah, well,” Pablo sighs, knocking your hand off his chest. “I’ll admit, my motivations are sullied… I might have credits down on you.”

“Oh karkin’ dunes.”

“Karkin’ dunes, what?” He throws out his hands. “That’s good! It means I believe in you!”

“Kark you.”

But your smile betrays your words.

Pablo laughs- flashes you a quick wink before turning away. “Now go- win me some credits, Sweetheart,” he yells over his shoulder. “I’ll take you to a casino and let you spend them!”

“Love you, too, Sweetcheeks!”

“Love you more!”

“You answered to it!”

“… Damn it!”

…

Heh.

Pablo really is just-

-“LINE UP WARNING.”

Oh stars-

-“REPEAT. LINE UP WARNING.”

Oh stars oh stars oh stars-

Groaning like a dying Bantha, you press a gloved hand to your browline.

Hell, that cocky, confident little shit you were as a teen?

…

Yeah, you’re not so confident right now.

“I know you’ll win-”

You spin around.

“-you always did.”

“Tesen,” you say, reaching out to accept his hug. “Dank Ferrik, man! I looked over my old speederbike this morning and- wow- you really did a fantastic job on her!”

Maker- the trouble you got into on that old bike… How are you even still alive? 

Tesen chuckles- a rumble beneath your cheek. “After you disappeared, others tried taking her out on runs. But only you could get her to do the things she’s capable of.”

He pulls back.

“I kept her for the memories.” 

A cheeky grin bursts across your face. “You know I’d trust no one else but you with her.”

His eyes brighten, and he opens his mouth to-

-“LINE. UP. WARNING.”

Groaning, you stare up into Tesen’s eyes.

“I’d wish you luck-” he winks- “-but I know you don’t need it.”

“Maybe not....” A coy smile turns up your lips. “But I could still do with my traditional good luck kiss. As my friend, would you mind… since Gavon isn’t here anymore to do me the honor?”

Tesen laughs- deep, hearty-

“Well, I am a good friend.”

He bends down- hesitates- hovering just above your face-

“Tesen, yo-”

Warm lips press to yours.

Oh hell yeah-

You wrap your arms around his waist.

Gosh, you’re pathetic. One friendly little kiss, and those cocky, confident teenage vibes are pulsing through your bloodstream.

Pretty sure you could wrestle a dewback…

“Aww! How sweet!”

Pulling away, you grit your teeth at Thall’s voice booming over the loudspeaker. Your eyes shoot up to the sky.

Stars, you could kill that man…

“Hello, hello everyone!”

Tesen tears away from you- meeting your eyes one final time before sweeping away-

-leaving you all alone.

Just you and your bike.

To win this dang race.

Or die.

At this point, if your friends didn’t need you to actually- you know- win, you’d accept either outcome.

“As we all know, one half of our kissing duo down there-”

“We’re just friends!”

“-is none other than our long-lost Blazing Womprat-”

The nickname snaps you into gear.

Oh yeah.

Time to play the part.

-“former champion of the Boska Springs Classic!”

Climbing up on your speederbike, you stand on the seat, throwing both hands in the air. You stare up into the cameras defiantly, as if you’d already won the kriffing race.

You wave your hands again, the crowd exploding into jests and cheers and shouts.

Dank Ferrik-

You swallow back the goofy grin itching to bloom across your face.

-don’t ruin your image.

You know you must play the part they expect to see on the circuit.

Blazing Womprat-

Brash.

Arrogant.

And batshit crazy.

Maker, how you missed this- this rush. Whether it be racing, singing, or otherwise, you love playing to the crowd…

And they’re eating it up.

“E CHU TA!”

Well…. almost everyone…

You sneer down at your fellow racers, observing their rather rude gestures.

“EAT MY BIKE EXHAUST-”

Your middle fingers jab at the sky.

“-YOU ABSOLUTE ROAD WORMS.”

The racers start towards you-

“How exciting! Back to your bikes… yes, thank you, yes, please don’t kill her… thank you!”

Snickering to yourself, you fall down into the seat, hooking your boots in position on the pedals.

“The race is simple enough- first out to the Castle Rock to run up their flag and back, wins!”

You slip your helmet on-

“I don’t care what path you take-”

You tug at your gloves, ensuring they’re snug between each finger-

“Nor do I care what you do during the race!”

You flip down the visor of your helmet, your entire head and face protected-

“It’s all part of the fun!”

You lean forward- gripping the steering-

“Now, various organic beings… start your engines!”

-and your speederbike roars to life, pulsating beneath your body like a caged racehorse ready to run.

…

Wait-

…

It… just hit you…

Din- he-

-he never showed up.

…

Why would he avoid you, especially before an event this serious? Sure, he was… strange, aloof this morning just before he left you. But to be honest, so were you.

Waking up tangled in each other’s arms tends to do that.

…

Hells… if- if your behavior last night… ruined your friendship with him…

Oh stars, you’ll never forgive yourself.

He… but he promised that he’d speak to you before the race…

…

He never showed.

He never-

“Ka’r’ika-”

You scream-

“Hey, it’s me.”

“What the kark, Mando!” You lean back, twisting your helmet around to stare up at the crowd. “Get out of my helmet! You’re ruining my focus.”

You grin.

The Mandalorian kept his word… sort of.

“Sorry… just…”

You stare up at Thall’s skybox, the teasing gleam of Beskar vaguely visible through the glass.

“…stay safe.”

The static of the connection cuts.

…

You’re alone.

…

…

“READY…”

Your engine revs-

RED LIGHT-

Your bike pulsates-

YELLOW LIGHT-

Your grip tightens-

…

…

…

 Wait a minute…

…

GREEN LIGHT-

The speederbikes burst into the distance- gone, out of sight within a blink of an eye.

…

You stay still.

Unmoving.

Staring out at the distance.

“Uhhhh…. Go?”

You stare.

You feel it…

You… feel it…

You-

The wind lashes, nearly knocking you from your bike with a yelp. You hold on for dear life as the crowd screams, ducking down into their own seats to avoid the brutal pounding.

But more importantly-

The sky darkens in the distance-

A monstrous dust cloud swoops across the sand-

-straight for the scattered bikers blasting across the dunes.

And-

you grin.

High-pitched screams and crashing metal reverberate across the dunes.

…

…time to go.

You push forward-

-and blast off.

…

Avoiding the starving, all-consuming dust cloud, you swing to the right.

It’s a risky route.

But you’ve studied it.

You know what you’re doing…

…hopefully.

Movement catches your eye-

A miniature speederbike zooms up to your right- a creature no bigger than the baby just- screeches at you.

“What the fuck!”

A second bike smashes into your left.

“What the fuck!” you shriek, swinging to avoid another swipe.

You accelerate- push forward on the controls.

Get away get away-

Ah!

There- looming in the distance.

The cliffs.

Turning knobs with a snap, you hold your speed steady- maintaining your direction-

“OOF!”

The end of your speederbike slides to the right- the attacking biker heaves back- preparing to try again-

You blast forward-

-straight for the cliff walls.

You release a bark of laughter- the sound swallowed by the wind whooshing past.

Try following me now.

The cliff wall looms closer- closer- closer-

You drop to the right, hanging off the side of your bike as far as you can without falling off-

-shooting beneath the cliff walls and straight into a small cave that’s barely tall enough for even your bike to fit.

The handles of your bike scrape the rock formation looming mere inches above your head- you yelp at the sparks showering your body.

Well, thank the Maker this jumpsuit is fireproof…

Movement-

 Your head twists to the right-

That karkin’ little creature on his karkin’ little speederbike… grins at you- waves his hand as if to say “See? I fit, dumbass.”

You growl.

Oh, hell no.

…Approaching light.

You bust out of the cave, shooting straight up in your seat. You swing to the right- kick your foot out-

-the little creature flings into oblivion.

…

You’re alone again.

You push forward, gritting your teeth, and accelerate to full throttle.

You’re coming to an intersection in the path- this is where other racers might start to- ah! There!

Three bikes, crowding into one another, swerve around a column of boulders-

The lead speederbike trails straight for you.

Oh, Dank Ferrik.

Not again-

You scream as your speederbike lurches- rolls into tight, spinning loops. The bike that smashed into you barrels past-

You grit your teeth.

Get back here, you little-

You ram the back of his bike, grinning as he flings forward over his handlebars- run over by his own bike.

And yours.

Oopsie.

Castle Rock is approaching- it should be directly to the left- on the opposite side of the cliff wall blocking your line of sight.

You cut the corner- the roar of the remaining speederbikes still howling in your ear.

You punch the booster controls on your bike- but…

You’re painfully aware of a new shake, a new tremor of the bike that wasn’t there before.

Oh dear…

Hope this doesn’t backfire- literally.

With a groan, you blast into the canyon between the cliffs- giving your bike all it’s got.

Your mind blanks-

Instinct.

…

You’re running on instinct.

You swerve to the left- right- sharp right-

The roar of the speederbikes fade into the distance, left completely in your dust.

Heh.

The Blazing Womprat lives up to her name.

Oh, heck, here we go-

-You need to take a sharp left up ahead or you’ll completely miss Castle Rock-

You lift your left boot from the pedal- slide it across your seat- throwing every bit of your weight into the turn.

Your grip starts to slip- gloves desperately hold on for dear life. With a pathetic groan, you straighten, lift-

-There, Castle Rock!

And not another bike in sight.

You hit the brakes, sputtering to a stop. The thunder of engines storm in the distance behind you- you leap from your seat-

And you run for dear life.

The flags- the flags! Up ahead! At the top!

With a grunt, you scurry, fumble your way up the boulders-

“Get out of my way!”

Your head shoots back- other bikers have arrived, parked at the base of Castle Rock.

Oh, you don’t think so…

“Oops!” You grunt, shoving hard at a loose rock with your boot. “Sorry!” you yelp as they leap out of the tumbling rock’s path, screaming at the top of their lungs.

Giggling beneath your breath, you scamper to the top, the flagpoles just within r-

-PING-

-PING-

You scream- a bullet ricochets off your helmet.

“Seven Corellian hells!” you screech, stumbling to the ground.

Tuskans!

Damn it!

You clamber to your feet, pushing forward with all your might.

Bullets shower the ground, the pings mixing with the yelps of your fellow racers. “Kark off!” you scream at a Weequay as he barrels past you-

then drops dead.

Well, he karked off, all right.

Nice shot, Tuskans.

Not slowing in the least bit, you snatch up your flag color, hooking it to the-

“OOPS… heehee!”

You gasp- a Rodian- he… he cut your flagline.

You snarl at his fleeing back.

…

Fine.

Sticking the flag between your teeth, you grip the pole with your hands and begin to climb. Dank Ferrik- what the hell even is this race?

Ignoring the pings flying around you and praying they miss, you reach the top and tie off your flag.

A bell rings.

Done.

You’re first.

You’re cleared to go.

With a pained sigh, you take advantage of your height to observe the sight down below.

Grinning at the scuffle, the fight breaking out between the racers all fumbling to avoid both bullets and one another’s sabotage…

…an idea occurs.

You reposition your weight, careful to not lose your grip and slip down the pole into the chaos below… One deep breath… and you leap the gap, clasping onto the second flagpole for dear life.

“Hey!”

You stare down at a furious Twi’lek.

“Get down!”

You grin.

“Okay!”

Biting your lip, you wrap the flagline one… two… three times around your glove, tugging to ensure a good grip.

Oh, this is the dumbest idea ever-

With a grunt, you release the pole and-

You swing forward- and back- forward- and back-

…screaming like a wild Lothcat in heat.

With each swing, you feel the pole shift beneath you, loosening from its shallow base.

“WHAT ARE YOU-”

“Yipe!”

With an audible snap, the pole breaks from its foundation- cascading to the ground…

…and taking every single flagpole to the right down with it.

With an oof, you hit the ground, hard. Peeling your head up with a groan, you turn-

…

“Get her!”

Time to go.

You jump- jump- jump- down the boulders, not bothering to check the height. You just gotta to get the kriff out of there.

You’re so close.

Flinging yourself across the seat, you blast into the horizon, straight in the direction of the starting line.

You’re so close-

Engines rev in the distance.

…

You’re so close.

Thumb hovering over your thrusters- a speederbike emerges in the distance-

…it’s time for a shortcut.

A cliff to your right, it’s a steep drop, but you think you can…

Gritting your teeth, you accelerate, pushing what power is left within your bike into- you scream, sailing straight over the edge of the cliff.

Your thumb punches the reverse boosters, keeping your bike from smashing into a thousand pieces on the ground below. Speederbike clattering and clanking from the stress, you hit level ground and-

You made it.

“Holy Hutt!” you groan, the words shaky in the air from the brutal reverberations of your engine.

You’re… you’re going to win.

You keep your path straight, flying over the sand dunes.

You’re going to win.

You’re going to-

You scream-

A force-

A burst of light-

You soar through the air-

You scream-

…

…

…

Darkness.

…

----------------------------

…

…

Ignoring the abrupt shock of the harsh Sularian winter air, you race from your home, running straight down the mountain path.

"Starlight?”

You don’t stop at your father’s voice. You run faster- swiping at the tears dripping down your cheeks.

“Starlight!”

A hand grabs at your shoulder.

“Let m-me go!” you yell between your sobs, shoving at his hand. “I-I’m going to l-live wi-with G-Grandpa!”

“Hey, little one-” he spins you around; pulls you into his chest- “deep breaths, hm?”

“I’m- I’m not… little!” You sniff, pushing away from him. “I’m ten and r-running away!”

"Can I come?”

…

You stare at him, the sobs easing from your body.

“Huh?” -sniff- sniff- “What?”

He plops down on the snow beside you- staring up at the stars dusting the sky.

“Running away doesn’t solve anything, Starlight-” he looks at you, flashes you a lop-sided smile- “you know that, right?”

You pout your lips.

“But Mama is so… so… unfair!” You stomp your foot and flop down beside him. “She’s so mean with me! She likes Kalara more!”

He doesn’t chastise your outburst.

He just… grunts- rests his rifle across his lap.

"Starlight.”

You keep your eyes turned to the ground, shame burning your cheeks.

"What happened?”

…

“I… I hit Kalara- but she said I was mean first! And Mama took her side!”

…

A heavy sigh.

He reaches down, grasps your pendant in his hand.

"Do you know why you wear this?”

You scrunch your nose at him. “Because I’m the ‘oldest’,” you mock.

He lets it drop back against your chest. “Watch the attitude, kid. You wear it because, as the oldest-” his tone, while gentle as always, eases into something more serious- “you set an example to your little brothers and sisters. They look up to you and want to be like you.”

“They do not!”

“Do too.” He pokes your stomach, and you can’t help but giggle. “This necklace is a reminder of your responsibility…” His mouth quirks into a smirk. “Of your influence.”

"I don’t want it!”

“Well, Starlight,” he chuckles. “I can’t help you being born first, but I promise, one day, you’ll appreciate your little brothers and sisters.” He hooks a finger on his belt. “And one day, you’ll give that same pendant to your first born, if you wish, just as generations of our family before you have.”

“Eww!”

“Eww!” he mocks back.

You blink down at the pendant, curiosity blooming in your chest…

"If this was yours before I was born and you gave it to me-” you look up at him- “does that mean you were the oldest?”

He stares into the distance, quiets…

…

“Yes.”

…

“Oh.”

…

"Did… did you apr-chi-ate them?”

"‘Appreciate’. And yes.” He looks down at you, that lop-sided smile slowly returning. “I did very much.”

"…Do you miss them?”

He glances away, stares up into the starry sky.

“Very much.”

You blink- a wash of fear- fear for your brothers and sisters hitting you like a blizzard breeze and- and-

“Don’t be sad, Starlight.” He taps your pendant; points to the sky. “They are with the stars… I’ll see them again.”

He stands, heaves his rifle against his shoulder, and motions you to follow.

“Come, let’s go inside. I think someone has a few apologizes to make?”

“But Mama is mad at me…” you groan.

“I promise,” he chuckles, taking your hand in his own. “No matter what you do…”

…

“…your mother and I will hold you in our hearts…”

…

“…for eternity…”

…

…

…

--------------------------

The Mandalorian’s licking your face what the HELL-

Your eyes blast open-

“W-what?”

Something wet swipes your eyes. “Yipes!” You squint, throwing your arm across your face. “What the blasted- oh.”

…

A… dog.

Massiff dog.

…

Not… Din.

…

Oh.

The dog tilts his head at you, his tongue drooping out the side of its mouth.

“In my defense, you kinda look like Din though,” you giggle, patting the dog’s hard exterior. “You goofy little thing…”

Sighing, you reach up to rub your face…

Wait.

Where- where’s your helmet’s visor…? Why’s it… busted out…?

…

…

“OH BLASTED STARS.”

You scramble to your feet- a mistake. You cry at the pain that shoots, throbs from head to toe. “Damn it, damn it!” you groan, hobbling forward as your memory floods you all at once.

The dog mistakes your agony for playtime, hopping up and down, up and down, dancing little wiggle-butt circles around you.

“Back, dog! Back!” Your eyes scan the sky-

…Oh no.

It’s… the sun’s setting.

It’s evening.

No, no!

“Kriffin’ hells!” you moan, fingers digging into your palms. “My bike! My bike? I got to- where?”

…

There.

In the distance.

You grit your teeth.

…

…Sandcrawler.

“Stupid JAWAS!”

You burst forward, growling through every last ache. “Get BACK here!” you shriek, launching your helmet at the still-very-much-far-away sandcrawler. “Little thieves! I ought to- OOF!”

The dog cuts in front of you, dashing alongside your right.

“Dang it!” you yelp. “If you’re coming too, then help, not hinder!”

The dog just howls- gleeful and blissfully unaware of everything but “run. fast run.”

“Oh, Maker help me,” you moan.

You’re close enough now that the Jawas have noticed you. Hanging out of their little windows and doors, they begin screeching at you.

“Kark off!” you scream back, nearly tripping over your own feet. “And give me my blasted bike, or I’ll- OUCH!”

Whatever they threw- it damn well hurt.

…You shoulda left your helmet on.

The dog picks up the object in its mouth and brings it straight to you.

“O-oh… st-stars!” you puff, increasing your speed. You throw the object at a Jawa hanging from an open window. “H-hey, dog, maybe you are useful, hmm?”

Your praise must have confused the dog. He yelps once, turns around, begins running butt-first.

“Oh hell.”

Close enough now, you reach up, grip a pipe on the side of the crawler.

“Open, now!” you demand, banging on the metal.

A slot opens- you slap at the Jawa- it screams- slams the slot shut.

A higher window opens- something’s launched- you scream- it screams- the window shuts.

You wish you could say playing whack-a-mole with Jawas was the strangest thing you’ve done today…

“Dank Ferrik,” you groan, eyeing the Massiff dog running circles below your feet.

You’re getting into this thing if it kills you, so help you-

“Dank FERRIK!”

The jolt of the sandcrawler sends you hurling towards the ground.

“Force…”

You slowly, gingerly lift your head…

Stopped.

The sandcrawler… stopped.

…

Why…

You look up- the Jawas have the slots and windows peaked open, glancing around towards the front of the crawler…

…

They slam them shut.

…

Uh oh…

“Dog, I… I think we might be in trouble- wait!”

But it’s too late- the Massiff dog is darting towards the front of the crawler.

…

Silence.

…

Oh, what the hell.

You’re not leaving without your dog.

Pressing against the sandcrawler, you ease, creep your way forward. Closer… closer… closer-

-until you’re just one head peek away from seeing what’s caught the Jawa’s attention…

…

 Do… do you peek?

Or run?

…

Oh Huttsludge.

Maybe the Jawas-

“I’ve been watching you, little one.”

OH STARS OH STARS STARS STARS.

…

WHAT DO YOU DO?

…

You squeeze your eyes closed.

Oh, what the Corellian crap use is there in hiding?

He’s knows you’re here!

So-

You peek around-

…

A man.

…

A terrifying man.

…

You duck your head back.

…

…

You’re dead.

…

“Hey!” you hiss up at a Jawa. “Whatever beef we had before, we’re on the same side now. Let me in!”

The door slams shut.

“Why you-”

“Hello there, Princess-”

You shriek.

“Stay away!” you yelp, pressing your back up against the sandcrawler. “Or I’ll- I’ll stick my Massiff on you!”

Right on cue, the Massiff bolts past your legs, flying straight for the strange man-

-and drops- wiggling around on his back, begging the scary man for attention.

…

Great.

The man huffs, bends down to pat the Massiff’s exposed belly.

“I see you’ve trained it well.”

…

“Thanks…?”

Wait, was that an insult?

…

“I mean you no harm, Princess.”

Amused.

He’s… amused.

The man glances up at you, throws his hood back.

My stars, you observe his gnarled appearance. What… what terrible thing happened to him?

You almost blurt the question… almost.

“Who are you? What’s your name?” you ask instead, rather empowered by the fact he hasn’t yet- you know- killed you.

“I’m just a simple man making my way through the galaxy-” his gaze intensifies- “like my father before me.”

…

“Got an easier to remember name?”

“I’d rather learn yours.”

…

Is he… flirting?

…

Oh my gosh he’s flirting. Okay, you know what? The grizzled look is actually really hot. Like hot, hot. And, wow, he’s a big guy and you like big guys oh my gosh he’s flirting-

With a lop-sided smirk, you call out your first name. “But you can keep calling me Princess.”

The man chuckles, pats the Massiff one last time, and stands.

“I was speaking to the dog.”

…

“Oh.”

Damn it.

…

You glance at the Massiff.

“…Noodles?”

“A solid name.”

“Thanks.”

…

Okay, what the actual hell is this conversation-

You shake your head, knowing you should be afraid, terrified... but in your defense, it’s rather hard to feel that way while bonding with your potential killer over a dog.

“So… uh, what the hell do you want?”

The man lumbers forward, hands folded behind his back, as if… contemplating something.

“Your Mandalorian friend-”

He pauses, his imposing frame casting a cool shadow across your face.

“-he has something that belongs to me.” The man turns his eyes, so kriffing intense, to stare you down.

“And you can take me to it.”

“Uhhh….” You blink, words escaping your brain. “What… is it?”

“My armor.”

…

“All I request… is my armor returned.”

Gulping, you shake your head, afraid to give him your honest answer. “I-I’ve not seen any armor, but-”

“You might want to consider my words carefully, little one.”

His words slice the air.

“You and the Mandalorian have a rather large bounty on your head.” The man bends down, crouches upon the sand. “According to this chip-” he lifts his hand; a small data chip gleams in the setting sun- “that I took off the corpse of the man… that blew you in the air.”

Your mouth plummets to the ground.

“W-what?!”

He just stares up at you, waiting patiently for you to process his words.

“Damn it,” you growl, sinking down to the ground in front of him.

“If- and that’s if- I knew where this armor might be located-” you look up at him, brows furrowing- “why should I trust that you won’t still try and claim that bounty on us?”

He doesn’t speak- just holds your gaze.

…

His fist holding the datachip rises in the air-

-and crushes the chip into a thousand microscopic shards.

“You and your friends need to leave before more return.”

You gape down at the shimmering shards.

Stars, note to self, do not piss this guy off…

“News of this race, and your presence, will spread to the wrong ears.”

“Uhh…” You turn to stare at the retreating figure of the man in black. “Hey! Wait!” You leap to your feet, rushing right after him. “See that’s the problem- my friends are kind of…. uh, trapped by Thall.”

The man makes a noise.

“I will assist you if-”

“-you regain your armor,” you finish, rolling your eyes.

The first hint of a smile dusts his lips.

“What is your answer, then, Princess?”

…It’s not like you have a choice.

Your friends… Din… are still under Thall’s snare. For all you know, now that you’re out of the way, Thall- kark!- might make Din fight again!

…

You can’t let that happen.

You throw both hands on your hips- purse your lips.

“We have a deal.”

The man nods sharply, accepting your answer before turning, prowling down the length of the sandcrawler.

“I have an insider feeding me information from within Thall’s complex.” His strides are heavy, yet quick. You struggle to keep pace. “She will contact me with the necessary information, but for right now-”

-a screech splits the air.

You gasp- twist-

The Massiff stumbles around from the back of the crawler-

-dragging a behind it a writhing Jawa.

…

The man in black grunts.

“We need your bike.”

----------------------------

You need to scream.

Of all ways for this day to go, you never dreamed it would be riding back to the Razor Crest sitting in a strange man’s lap.

Well, not in his lap… but might as well be.

You wanted to drive. After all, it is your bike, which was thankfully undamaged enough to still ride at lower speeds, but he didn’t exactly give you a choice… You press back against his chest, sneaking a sharp glance to the left and right, gulping at how blasted thick and strong his arms that have you caged in are…

Boba Fett.

At least you now have his name.

It’s the very least you should know, considering your current intimate positioning.

Boba’s hand releases the bike’s handle- grips your shoulder to steady your body as you turn-

Stars-

Stars this is so awkward and you want to fling yourself to the ground you don’t care how fast you’re going-

But if you did that, Noodles would have to go too, since he’s squatted on the seat in front of you, your arms wrapped tightly around his body to keep him from jumping off at high speeds. And no matter how much you’re willing to potentially threaten your own life, you draw the karkin’ line at endangering animals.

Noodles glances back at you, tongue flapping in the wind, as if to say thank you kind ma’am for the hug.

…

…

The sky is pitch black, the air cool, biting, by the time you arrive at Peli’s hanger. Almighty stars, it feels like centuries since you last saw… there!

The Razor Crest!

You can’t believe you’re actually home!

You pause.

Home?...

…huh.

Stars, you can almost imagine… Din. Standing at the base of the ramp. Head angled at you as you run forward, holding the baby-

…the baby. Din. Cara. Pablo. Kark.

You… you need to hurry.

“Let me find someone before you go inside-” you yank off your gloves, toss them aside- “and your armor should be inside the ship… somewhere- I guess-”

A shrill squeak rips the rest of the words from your lips.

“Baby!” you gasp. You rush forward, crumpling to your knees. “Hey, little fella!” Your voice shoots ten octaves high as you squeeze, squish the little guy to your chest.

“Hey, hey-” you whisper, rubbing his head as his little squeaks intensify.

Crying.

He’s… crying-

“I know, I know.”

Kriffing hells.

“You’ve been alone too long.���

Damn it, damn it.

You’re going to cry. Don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry.

“But you’re not alone now, hmm?” You pull back, force a cheesy grin to stretch across your face. “See? I’m back. Did Peli take good care of you?”

“AHHHH!”

You press the baby close- spin-

“4PO!” Peli screeches, racing around the side of the Crest. “MASSIFF DOG! PROTECT US!”

The droid hobbles around- stops-

<sensing potential threat>

…

<commencing deactivation protocol>

…

“Oh, kriffing hells…”

You glance over at the hanger door, locating the deadly Noodles…

…all four legs in the air as Boba pats his belly.

He gives you a bare hint of a smile.

“Excellent.”

----------------------------

 “Handsome little mister,” you sing, grinning ear-to-ear. “Gotta look snazzy to go rescue Daddy, hmm?”

The baby just stares at you, clearly unimpressed with his new threads.

“Come now. I’m the fun parent,” you laugh, straightening his little suspenders. “Tell you what, if you don’t like it by tomorrow-” you sit down beside him- “I promise I won’t make you wear it again. We’ll try something else I bought you in town.”

The baby grabs a sock off the table- throws it to the ground with a scream.

“Okay.” You quirk a brow. “We hate socks today, that’s fine.” You lean forward, pressing a quick kiss against his head.

The baby’s grabby hands reach up, begging to be held. Without hesitation, you lift him up and place him down in your lap.

“That nice man should be finished dressing soon,” you absentmindedly mumble, twisting your eyes to watch Peli buzz around the back of the hanger. “And then we’re going to- oh.”

A little tug around your neck pulls your attention back down-

The baby- he’s tugging on the twine of your necklace.

“Ah,” you chuckle, pulling the pendant out from beneath your shirt.

“You want to look?”

He stares up at you, into your eyes.

…

…

-pressure-

…

you feel…warm pressure-

…

it dusts against…

…

It’s… it’s like…. something’s pressing against a- a membrane…

….

-pressure-

…

-a thick membrane in your mind and-

…

w-what- is-?

Body trembling, you press back-

the membrane slips and- and-

…

“Mother?”

You gasp, clapping a hand over your mouth.

Who..? Wh-what just-?

Something dusts your hand, and you jolt in your seat- eyes shifting down…

…

“Was… was that you?” you whisper, eyes blasting wide open.

The baby only giggles.

…

…

Oh kriff.

…

You flop back in the chair, stare up at the sky.

“Is this a… force thing?”

You’re speaking to yourself more than anything…

“Holy kark,” you groan, slapping your hands across your eyes. “…These kinds of powers are beyond my pay grade….”

Dank Ferrik, you knew you should have paid closer attention to your mother’s lessons… She was as close to an expert on the force as any Jedi, you suppose... Was it your fault you would rather be with your dad, learning how to effectively hit your siblings with stick spears? Mama damn near bored you to death with her long lectures of “light side energy.”

…Whatever that means.

See? You should have paid attention, Dank Ferrik!

The baby tugs on your necklace again.

You blink.

-pressure-

This time, you let the membrane slip right away.

“You are Mother?”

You just… stare.

“Feel force.”

…

“I, uh…”

“Feel her.”

…

His… his question-

Are you a Mother?

…

Emotion scalds the back of your throat.

…

“Yes…”

He… he feels her.

“This… this belonged to my little girl.”

The necklace-

…He feels her.

“A-and mine. And my father’s.” Your voice softens, affection dusting each and every word. “Going back generations.”

Swallowing down the lump, the ache squeezing in your chest, you force a tight smile.

-the warmth brushes against your mind-

-you open up- let him back in-

…

“Grogu.”

…

You blink-

“Grogu?”

He bursts into little squeals.

“Is that your name, Bean Dip? Grogu?”

The little toothy grin he flashes you is the only confirmation you need. Matching his grin with one of your own, you laugh- pull him close.

“Can I still call you Bean Dip sometimes?” you ask.

He doesn’t answer- instead grabs at your necklace again, studying it intently.

You can only… smile at his interest…

You… remember Valera doing the very same thing… grabbing at it- sticking it in her mouth- drooling all over it-

…

Hell.

…

…

“Hey, hey, Grogu-” your voice wavers- you clear your throat- “You know… I’m- I’m always losing things.”

Deep breath.

“Would you mind… keeping this for me?”

You slip the necklace over his head, letting it fall loose. You reach out, pat it against his belly.

…yes.

For the time being…

…this is where it belongs.

Ignoring your welling ache, you force another tight smile.

“I think-” you give the necklace a few short tugs- “it completes your ‘let’s rescue daddy’ outfit perfectly.”

…He agrees.

“Holy Mudslug!” Peli’s yelp tears at your attention. “Look at ‘em!”

You glance up-

-and your stomach squeezes.

…

Oh.

Oh no.

…

Mandalorian.

…

“Fett!” you bark, setting the baby down. You leap to your feet, stomp to the bottom of the ramp.

“You mean to tell me that you’re a Mandalorian?” You stare up at Boba defiantly, feet set apart and hands thrown on your hips. “And you just… forgot to mention that?”

Dank Ferrik! When Boba said “armor,” you assumed it was, like, biking armor or something.

…

But Beskar?

…Well…now you understand why he wanted it back so badly…

Boba doesn’t react to your little outburst- just… crosses his wrists in front of him, staring down at you with that damn unreadable visor.

“Oh! Great! Another Mandalorian,” Peli grumbles, sweeping past you, a broom gripped in her hand. “You know, my hanger was the safest place on Tatooine-” she shakes her broom at Boba- “until you Mandalorians started showing up!”

“Peli! Come now-” you grasp her broom, forcing her to lower it- “how many have you even serviced? Mandalorians are practically extinct.”

“Counting yours and this green guy?”

You nod.

Peli glances up at the sky, counting on her fingers.

“Two.”

…

“But I want him out of here!” she squawks- shoving a hand in the air at him.

“You’ll have your wish soon, ma’am.”

Amusement laces Boba’s deep tone- thank the Maker.

“And I am beholding to your…kind hospitality.”

“Weeellll,” Peli blushes, eyes darting around at the ground. “I- I guess it’s fine if you stay- but not much longer!”

Peli shoots you a glare and snatches her broom back from your hands. She jabs her thumb at the ship. “Watch him; he’s a big -un.”

…

Sigh.

…

Twisting back around, you frown at Boba's darkened visor.

“I thought Mandalorians didn’t show their faces?”

-a sharp huff.

“Never said I was one.”

You blink.

“Then… the armor…?”

“Mandalorians are complicated, Princess.”

…What the hecking Hutt does that mean? Is he or isn’t he one?

…oh.

…forget it.

Crossing your arms, you shift your weight to one leg.

“Well, what now?”

“My contact has informed me that your friends are to be taken to a location out in the desert- unsure why.” Boba hulks down the ramp, patting your shoulder as he passes by.

“Stars!” you groan, pulling your hat down low.

This… can’t be good.

Din…

Just… hold on, Din.

“I have the coordinates.” Loading his belt with charges, Boba steals a quick glance at you- noting your expression. “Don’t worry, little one,” he chuckles. “We’ll have your babysitter back in one piece shortly.”

“I can assure you,” you huff, a small smile teasing at the corner of your mouth. “I don’t need a babysitter.”

“Undoubtably.”

You release a pained sigh, flick your hat back out of your face.

“Well then, I guess it’s time to-” movement draws your attention; you turn just in time to watch Grogu slide the remaining pile of socks to the ground- “…go.”

“Hey, if you’re leaving-” Peli stalks forward, cleaning her hands with a rag. “I guess that means I won’t see the rest of you again, huh?”

You give Peli a wry smile.

Peli sighs, slaps the side of your arm.

“Do me a favor then.”

She scurries away, muttering under her breath.

…

“Uhhh… Peli?”

She turns back around the corner, arm motioning at something hidden behind a stack of crates.

“Come on- don’t be shy.”

…

Oh, hell no-

“I’ve decided to make the ultimate sacrifice-” Peli pushes 4PO forward- “and gift 4PO here as a parting gift-”

“No.”

-“to Pablo.”

“Oh.”

…

Peli leans into you- covers her mouth with a hand.

“I think the two of them really bonded.”

…

“Peli-” you bite the inside of your cheek to keep from bursting into laughter- “I would be more than happy to present to Pablo 4PO on your behalf.”

“Oh ho! Fantastic!” Peli cackles, clapping her hands together. “Droid, get on up that ramp!”

4PO shakes- falls prostrate on the ground.

…

…

You’re beginning to relate a little too much to this droid.

…

----------------------------

“I’ll tie you up, Princess.”

“No!” You rush after Boba, pulling your blaster from its holster. “I’m going too! You can’t-”

“You want to help?” snaps Fett’s contact, a helmeted woman named Fennec. “Then stay out of our way.”

You sneer. “How about I-”

“Princess-”

Boba turns on his heel, grips your shoulder.

“Stay with the ship.” His tone is hard, biting. “And stay in this cave.”

…

“Do I make myself clear?”

…

Your mouth opens… closes.

Please…

Please just let me come.

But Boba is not the kind of man to relent to a pair of pleading eyes- he reaches out, nudges your chin with his knuckles.

“Keep your commlink on-” his voice is… softer, but nowhere near sympathetic- “and keep it close.”

And then just like that-

They’re gone, blasting away across the sand dunes.

Leaving you all alone in eerie…

Silence.

…

Corellian hells.

You crumple to the ground, your face buried in your hands. You inhale sharply, squeezing your eyes tightly closed in a poor attempt to keep from absolutely losing it.

…

A fight to the death.

A fight to the death-

What if-

What if they don’t get there in time? What if someone’s already dead? Stars! Pablo is all bark and no bite- he’ll be the first to croak! And- and Cara- and Din, kark… damn it, damn it, damn. IT-

“ARG!” You leap to your feet, snarling up at the rising twin suns, as if they were somehow to blame for your mess.

Stay behind?

…

You blink.

Stay behind, your ass.

With one final glare, you spin around- marching back inside the mouth of the cave. You rush past Boba’s own starship- making a direct path towards the Razor Crest.

“Grogu!” you yelp, racing inside the belly of the Crest. “I’ve got to go, baby. Stay in this ship-” you fling open the Mandalorian’s storage unit packed with weapons- “and do absolutely nothing.”

Chewing on your lower lip, you let your eyes graze across Din’s pride and joys-

What the hell do some of these even do?

Which should you-

…

Oh.

You… you’ve seen that one before.

…

Your hand hesitates, then snatches the rifle from the rack.

“4PO-” you bark, loading your pockets with ammo. “Keep the ship on lockdown. You can manage that, hm?”

<lockdown protocol prevents killers from boarding.>

“That’s kind of the point of a lockdown,” you grumble, slamming the storage doors shut.

<excellent. your request is acceptable.>

You spin around on your heel, looking for-

“Grogu.”

There he is- sound asleep, little face buried against the Massiff’s belly-

-and your pendant clenched tightly in his hand.

…

Stay.

You should… stay for him.

If- if something happens to Din, he will need you.

…

He needs… he needs-

-hold on.

…

…Rumbling?

The ground outside the ramp is… rumbling- pebbles and loosened dirt sprinkling down from the cave’s ceiling.

Something’s flying overhead.

This… can’t be good-

With a miserable groan, you start forward, pausing just before the exit.

You glance back-

“We’ll all be back soon, Grogu, I promise.” You stare at the sleeping child’s form. He doesn’t so much as even stir at your words.

“And I mean all of us.”

…

“I promise.”

…

And with one final breath, you run down the ramp- the baby left behind, cocooned within the belly of his home.

Dashing forward, you emerge from the mouth of the cave just in time to catch fleeting sight… of…

…

-a hitch, a catch in your breath.

…

…

Damn it.

…

…

Th-the symbol on that ship-

You… you only caught a brief glimpse, but…

…

Shit.

…

Nok.

Kriffing Nok is here?

You- you have to leave Tatooine.

-kriffing now.

…

If- if you take your speederbike, leave immediately, y-you could take a shuttle and…

…

…

Leave?

…But-

But if you leave again…

Heart squeezing- shredded into a thousand fraying strands, you glance back at the mouth of the cave.

…

…

Running away doesn’t solve anything, Starlight.

…

…

Kark it.

…

You’re done running.

This time, you fight.

…

You’re not leaving Tatooine without your boys.

…

…

---------------------------

-BOOM-

You slam on your speederbike’s breaks, the bike groaning against the force. You waste no time in shutting it off, launching from the seat before it’s even fully stopped.

-BLAST-

Dank ferrik dank ferrik dank ferrik-

-BLAST-

-BLAST-

Growling through your teeth, you push forward, rifle held in a death grip against your side.

“Gunna try and kill my Mandalorian?” you snarl. “And my friends? Oh, I think the hell not, Thall. Eat blaster dust!”

You skid to a stop- boots sliding within inches of an…. uh, extraordinarily high descent.

Dropping to your knees, you peer over the edge of the cliff, peer at the canyon floor far, far down below.

What’s going on?

Where-?

You gasp, pressing a hand to your mouth.

Holy Kowakian monkey lizard!

Your eyes widen, watching as flamethrowers and blaster bolts and bodies fly and fling and throw-

Those who aren’t sprawled out on the ground karkin’ dead are certainly about to be karkin’ dead. The crowds- the pleasure barges- Thall- are long gone, no doubt fled when extra firepower arrived in the form of a pissed-off Boba Fett and co.

In fact, to you, it looks like they’ve just about wiped the canyon clean.

Holy Huttslug! You purse your lips. They didn’t leave anyone for you, darn it.

Ah well.

Grumbling beneath your breath, you lay out flat on your stomach. You knock your hat back, positioning the scope of the rifle against your eye.

“Din!” you laugh, watching as he stabs a Weequay in the chest. “Get ‘em, baby! Oh my gosh GET HIM! Hell YEAH!”

Reaching down into your pockets, you retrieve the extra ammo- loading the rifle with-

“Ayyeeaaaaa!”

You gasp, and you peer back through the scopes, zooming in to watch as your friends… whoop and cheer.

Oh, they did it! They actually blasted did it!

A grin cracks across your face, your anxiety pushed to the back of your mind for the time being. Because for now?  

THEY BLASTED DID IT!

Giggling, you pull up your knees, prepared to leap up and-

…Wait a minute- who is that? He’s not-

-you freeze.

…

Oh.

…

Oh no.

Hissing through your teeth, you drop to your belly, press the scopes against your eye. There- Nok- approaching the group. He stops- stands several yards away from your friends.

…

Nok… what the hell is he doing here? That slimy Huttscum! Shavit! Just… shavit! What does that- that spiteful man want?

…

“Crink it!” You smash your fist against the ground. “Blast!”

This is bad. Really, really bad.

…

They’re- they’re all talking together. His hands are up now- What- what are they saying?

Kark

Kark!

What- what do you- oh kriff oh kriff-

You pull your twitching eye away from the scope- glance down at your belt.

…an idea.

“Fett,” you mumble into the communicator. “No questions- turn on your comm.”

You watch Boba through the scopes- he does not scan his surroundings, does not try and look around for you. He just… reaches up, taps his helmet.

-static- “-not here ..r you.”

Nok’s voice is faint, hard to make out. You curse, turning up the comm’s volume as loudly as it will allow.

“What do you want?”

You jump at Din’s voice, cutting in loud and clear through your comm channel. Biting your lip, you are frozen with panic and fear and oh blast what should you do Nok will ruin everything what do you do-?

…

Kriff!

You press, squeeze your eyes closed-

You… you can’t go back.

Your lower lip trembles.

…You can’t go back!

…

“Don’t shoot the messenger. I don’t particularly want to be here either, but I wasn’t exactly given a choice,” Nok answers Din. “I’m here to present to you an offer.”

No- no you trust nothing coming from Nok- nothing!

“ …What kind of offer?”

Oh stars. With a sharp inhale of air, you raise, hover your scopes just above their heads, watching, listening-

“There’s a woman you’ve been traveling with. If you hand her over into my care-” Nok sighs, leans to one side as if bored- “you will be compensated generously in return for your cooperation.”

Oh-

Oh stars- NO!

You’re not going back to Nar Shaddaa. You can’t-

Nok- he needs to shut up-

Shut up before he ruins everything!

“Request- denied.”  The Mandalorian’s tone is… hell- he might kill this man himself. “How much-” he steps forward- “how much to call off the hunters you have on her?”

Nok just chuckles.

“You mean my patron? My patron is not the one who called the hunters on her … Believe me, I’d enjoy nothing more than watch her hunted down, personally. But my patron is… concerned for her. Wishes to shield her. And, alas, I am at his beck and call.”

“Your patron?” you snarl, tightening the grip on your rifle. You hover it just above Nok’s head. “Your patron can eat Banthashit, Nok, and you along with him. I’m not. going. back. Especially not with you.”

“What makes you think that I’d agree to this?” The Mandalorian’s tone is… dangerously calm.

“You can keep running, but she will be tracked down eventually,” Nok chuckles, clearly amused by all this- this mess you’re in- the kriffing creep. “This isn’t going away, Mandalorian.”

Hell-

You’re so… tempted to shoot him before he talks, blabs and ruins everything! Din- kark!- your past, it would ruin everything. He’d… he’d be disgusted and… and-

“This isn’t your problem, Mandalorian,” Nok sighs.

“…Her problems-” the Mandalorian’s hand inches towards his blaster- “are my problems.”

You blink.

…Stars.

“You really don’t have any idea what this involves, do you?” Nok laughs- brighter than you ever thought him capable of. How comforting to know your predicament brings him so much blasted joy. Maker knows the man is miserable otherwise.

Nok takes a step forward.

“You may know who she is, but it’s clear you don’t know what she is.”

Shut up shut up shut up.

Nok’s going to ruin everything. Din will- he will… damn it. You’re going to burst-

“My patron had hoped we could do this the clean, easy way. Avoid future bloodshed.”

…

The Mandalorian takes a slow, deliberate step forward.

“That’s where you were mistaken.”

He draws his blaster-

“Because not only would I die for her-” he points the weapon at Nok- “I’d kill.”

You pull away from your scope, mouth gaping open.

You- you never realized…

…

But… of course that’s how he feels.

“So, you go back to your patron-” the Mandalorian reholsters his weapon, his tone cool, even- “and you tell him that.”

Nok shakes his head, sighs. “Well, only if you promise to tell her I look forward to seeing her again very soon… in the latest fashion of prison restraints.”

The Mandalorian storms forward- drawing his weapon- Nok draws his-

They freeze- stare at each other.

“Oh great, she really has you under her thumb, doesn’t she?” Nok snorts, waving his weapon to the side. “You should reconsider. She’s selfish, you know. She’ll throw you aside as soon as she no longer needs you. Never cared about anything or anyone except herself and that little brat of hers.”

He chuckles- leans forward-

“Let’s just say it was hilarious irony …

…what happened to the little girl.”

…

…

Hilarious irony…

…

Hilarious irony-

…

Hilarious-

Red flashes- flashes in your eyes-

…

…

You- you’re-

…

…Hilarious irony.

…

…

The dam holding back your terror and grief and fury…

Erupts-

…

See you in hell, bastard.

…

You pull the trigger.

…

And you don’t miss.

Shouting- shouting from down below-

Damn it- they… they can’t find you here! You need to go!

With a sharp inhale of breath, you aim your rifle sights at a safe, yet convincing, distance from your friends, and-

-BLAST-

-BLAST-

-BLAST-

“Take cover!”

And at Cara’s muffled cry, you stumble up to your feet… and run.

Oh Maker, how are you- yipes! Jetpack- you hear a jetpack! Go-

GO!

Pressing a hand to your mouth, you choke back the sob, the howl threatening to tear from your lips. Flinging yourself across the speederbike, you ignore the warning tremors of the damaged bike, blasting across the dunes and away from the scene of your crime.

…

But you’re not finished yet.

You have to find Nok’s ship.

Wipe the computers.

Dump it out in the desert to rot.

…

But… but before it’s wiped… there’s something you must take from the starship’s computers…

----------------------------

<tier 1 security clearance code request>

-security code: 345-453

<security clearance code APPROVED>

<drellik computer archives accessed>

<how may i assist you?>

-begin download on all encrypted data filed under: valera dayne

<tier 3 security clearance code request>

-security code: starlight-2171

<security clearance code APPROVED>

<file download estimated between 1 and 3 standard hours to completion. commence with download?>

-yes

<command accepted. please enjoy our selection of jazz instrumentals while we select your files>

-have i not suffered enough today?

---------------------------

“WHERE have you BEEN?”

You lift your dry, burning eyes, spying Pablo- baby on his hip and Massiff at his heels- rushing down the ramp of the Crest.

“We’ve been searching hours for you!” He pulls you into a one-armed hug. The Massiff- Noodles, you suppose- not one to be left out of the fun, wiggle-butt dances around you for 3.5 seconds until he’s distracted by a moth.

“Stars,” you groan, every achy muscle and bruise throbbing at Pablo’s touch. You open your mouth to say something, but a sharp squeak steals those words from your lips.

You glance down.

“Little fella.” Flashing a tired smile, you reach out, taking the babbling child from Pablo’s hip. “See? I told you we’d be back!” 

He stares up at you- giggles, and your tired smiles warms. The kid didn’t need the force to communicate with you this time. You know- can feel- what he’s feeling…

He’s… he’s really, really glad you’re back.

“Well, looks like you’re all in one piece, Bean Dip.” You quirk a brow, reaching out to stroke Grogu’s ear. “A miracle, if you’ve been in Pablo’s care all day…”

“The hell, Sweetheart?” Pablo throws his hands on his hips. “Is that the thanks I get? I’ve done nothing today but wipe up drool, chase after the kid, clean up after him- oh, and that thing?”

He glares at Noodles- busy running laps around Fett’s starship and howling at dust particles.

“It shit on the floor.”

Heh.

Good dog.

“Look Pablo, we can fuss about that later,” you sigh, legs trembling with exhaustion. You pull the baby closer, his presence a… comfort… A comfort you need right now as things are about to get…uh, complicated.

“You said… everyone’s out searching for me?”

“All day practically.” Pablo crosses his arms. “Mando was hell-bent on finding you before sundown… which is just about now, coincidentally.”

You swallow back the lump in your throat.

“I… I see.”

…

“What- what happened-” you bite your lip- “after my bike… kaboomed?”

Pablo huffs, flashes you a look. “The cameras following your bike cut immediately. And Thall refused to let us go rescue you and said he’d send his own men instead… which, uh, the Mandalorian did not take well… to put it mildly.”

You grit your teeth.

Thall- you scumbag.

“Mando annihilated half his security team, and-” Pablo shrugs- “according to that Fett guy, you know the rest of the story. With their help, we demolished Thall’s men- we didn’t die- and now you’re back! Overall, a successful trip to Tatooine, I suppose…”

…

Dank Ferrik…

That… look he just gave you. He’s… holding back about Nok, about the- the things he said. Maker! You- keep it together.

Keep it together for the-

“Ka’r’ika?”

You whirl-

“Din, I-”

-you’re swept up.

His arms clutch, grab at your body like you might disappear, float away, if he dared let go.

“Ner Ka’r’ika.”

His voice is hoarse… strained.

You bury your grimace against his chest.

Stars stars stars! What- does he suspect? What does he think of you after- after Nok’s… rantings?

You-

You can’t do this-

You can’t do this!

You lift your free hand, and shove at his chest. Din jolts, tears back, and the comfort of his hold slips away, leaving your body abandoned and starving for warmth.

You’ve startled him. He’s giving you that little head-tilt, the one he uses when he can’t quite figure you the kriff out.

“Din.” You force a light-hearted tone, adjusting the baby against your hip. “Uh, hi.”

…

He pauses, then dips his helmet forward- scanning your grungy appearance up and down. Keeping his left hand stiff against his side- he reaches up with the other, presses the gloved hand against your cheek.

“Look at me.”

You swallow- staring at anything but his visor.

He tentatively, carefully turns your face- inspecting the flowering bruises.

“Are you okay?”

…

“Nothing’s broken.” You swallow again. “I’ll live.”

“Kid’s built of tough stuff.”

Your eyes widen, shoot to the right-

Boba.

Kark- he knows- he knows you were at the canyon. He… he answered your comm. Of course he knows! Did he tell?

“She launched a hundred feet into the air and was up and fighting Jawas within the hour.”

You flash him a faint smile. “I landed on my hard head.” You grip Din’s hand still pressed to your cheek, drawing it away.

“Good to see you in one piece, Blazing Womprat,” Cara chuckles, unstrapping a rifle from her side. “Which is truly astounding after some of those insane stunts you pulled.” She steps forward, stops beside Pablo. “Pablo almost passed out from cheering too hard.”

“That was nothing.” You can’t resist the self-satisfied smirk that flicks up at the corner of your mouth. “You should see me-”

“-on a swoopbike.”

You stare at Din.

“Where have you been?”

Kriff, you knew the question would come eventually. You… hope your story checks out- that Boba doesn’t ruin things.

You place the baby down, letting him toddle across the ground towards Pablo.

“I decided to go a bit outside the cave, check around, you know?” Shaky breath. “One of Thall’s transports spotted me- recognized me… So, I, uh, took the bike out, far, far away from the Crest, as fast as I could in its damaged state, hoping to keep it… hidden.” Trembling hands in pockets. “Worked great until I got turned around. Took me a while to find my way back.”

…do they believe you?

Your eyes sweep across their faces- their shoulders relaxing...

They believe you.

…

But… then there’s Boba, and possibly Fennec. You- you need to talk to them.

“Well,” Pablo sighs. “What a way to spend the day… So, what now?”

“We’ve talked it over-”

You turn to Din.

“For tonight, we stay in this cave. Lay low. Analyze the situation tomorrow.”

Heavy sigh.

You… can’t argue with that. Laying low- resting… For one night, you need it. You need it desperately.

“Sounds like bedtime,” Pablo sighs, already blazing a path for the Crest. You watch, blinking, as the rest follow suit, each leaving for their respective ships.

“Pablo,” you call out, voice traced with exhaustion. “Take Noodles inside.”

“The hell?”

“My dog.”

“…No way! That thing is not sleeping in-”

“Noodles!” Cara calls, laughing as the dog highspeed races up the ramp.

“Your dog?”

You turn at Din’s rasp-

Stars… you want to cry at the stiffness, the rigidity in his body… You know you caused it, but…

“It’s going to eat bad people for me on Keolith.”

…

He just grunts at that.

Stars…

Pulling your hat low across your brows, you sigh, “Go on to bed, Mando. I- I think I’m going to spend some time on… Fett’s ship…”

You need space.

…

You need space to think.

…

“And maybe… maybe stay the night.”

The Mandalorian’s arms drop.

…

…

…

“……Okay.”

…

And just like that, he’s scooped the child up into his arms- trudging away towards the Razor Crest, cape fluttering at his heels.

…

Damn it.

You stare at the Crest.

…

That… came out wrong.

…

…

----------------------------

“Princess,” Boba smirks, lifting a glass as you walk through the door.

You discovered Boba and Fennec where you expected- sitting in the cockpit of his ship… as if they knew you were coming.

“No thanks.” You throw your hands on your hips. “We need to talk.”

Something flies at your head- you catch it.

Opening the palm of your hand, you gawk down at-

“Next time,” Boba chuckles, “don’t leave your commlink at the scene of a hit job.”

…

“Oh.”

You swallow.

“Oops?”

“Nice shot.” Fennec smirks. “And here I thought you were inexperienced.”

…

You are inexperienced…

“Lucky first-time assassination, is all.” A pang knocks against your chest cavity. “Beginner’s luck?”

Oh stars, stop trying to be cute. Now’s not the time- you’re having a mental crisis for Maker’s sake-

“Thank you for not saying anything,” you mumble, eyes flicking between Boba and Fennec. “It… would have put me in an awkward position.”

…

You bite your lower lip…

Just blurt it out.

“Boba,” you sigh, “why are you helping me?”

…

Arms pressed against his thighs, Boba leans forward.

“Just fulfilling my end of the deal.”

Something… flicks in his eyes- the first time you’ve seen his mask… falter.

…oh.

…

He’s lying.

“Go, Princess-” a dust of a smile shadows his face- “you’re with the wrong Mandalorian tonight.”

…He’s right.

And with a deep grimace, you head for the door-

“I would have shot him too-”

You glance back at Boba.

“-if that helps you.”

You flash him a small smile.

…

It does…

…

----------------------------

“Where’s… uh, Mando?” you ask, head popping up into the Crest’s cockpit from the ladder below.

Pablo shrugs, focused intently on his card game with Cara.

“In his room.” Cara smashes a card on the dash- Pablo erupts into groans.

"Pay up, Babycakes…”

With a roll of your eyes, you begin descending the ladder. When your feet touch the floor, you freeze- overwhelmed, paralyzed with… anxiety?

Damn it… it’s… just Mando…

Just… do it!

Pursing your lips, you march past a prostrate 4PO with a snoring Noodles- all four feet in the air- resting beside him. And with one final march forward, you find yourself right at the Mandalorian’s door…

…

“…Mando?”

knock- knock-

“Uh, can I… come in?”

…

…

“It’s unlocked.”

Chewing on your lower lip, the door snaps open beneath your touch.

…

“Din?” you call out hesitantly, sticking your head inside.

“Thought you were with Fett.”

Your eyes turn in the direction of the refresher.

…

“His… ship smelled weird.”

The refresher door snaps open, and Din steps out-

“BLAST!” you yelp, stumbling backwards. “What the hell! Where’s your armor!?”

Dank Ferrik! It’s- it’s like looking at the man naked! Should you, you don’t know, spin away!?

Din just… tilts his helmet at you- rests his hands at the waist of his flight suit.

“I don’t sleep in my armor.”

…oh.

You lean back against the closed door, listening as Din shuffles around the room.

Kriff! What do you say? … Why isn’t he saying anything? Oh gosh oh gosh-

“Where’s the baby?” you blurt, beginning to turn towards him. “Is he- OH-”

ARM REVEAL.

…

OH SHIT.

SHIT.

KRIFFING GUNS-FOR-DAYS.

“I put him down in the bunk.”

“Huh?” you puff, snapping your eyes away from his… his big-ass GUNS- oh kriff.

“The child-” Din steps over a pile of junk to open a drawer- “he was... fussy.” He pauses… hooks his thumbs on his suspenders. “I thought… maybe he’d sleep better near your scent.”

Oh-

Oh stop just throw you into the pits of Carkoon will you.

Shoulders slumping forward, you groan inwardly- using every bit of your determination to not bolt right out the door.

Oh kriff, you hate this- this awkwardness. Just… ask him something! And for the love of all things good and holy- DON’T STARE AT HIS ARMS.

“What are you, uh, doing?”

“Going to bed.”

“Oh.”

…

You blink.

…

“Okay, goodnight-”

Flinging around, you reach for the door, but a hand, a grip on your wrist pulls you back.

“What are you doing?” you snap, stumbling at the motion.

“You need a real bed.”

“So do you.”

“I know.”

Oh.

Oh.

…

Well then.

…

Hell yeah.

…

You let him lead you, guide you around a pile of clothing- like a shepherd leading his flock through a minefield… only instead of a minefield it’s Din’s rancid room.

…But that’s an argument for another day.

Pausing at the foot of his bed- his visor trails down your legs…

"Sit.”

Damn it if you won’t obey. Stars, you’re pathetic.

“Din, what are you-”

He drops to his knees- bare fingers fumbling with the laces of your dust-caked boots. You watch- fighting to keep your expression neutral as the ridiculous man begins to remove your shoes for you.

…You also have to fight to not stare at his exposed arms and blasted-broad shoulders, but you’re much less successful at that part…

“Best be careful, Din Djarin.” A small smirk begins to grow. “I could get really used to this kind of treatment.”

“Who was he?”

You blink.

“…Huh?”

“That-” Din’s fingers pause- “that man.”

 Your mouth pops open at his… vehemency.

“Boba?” You quirk a brow down at him.

Blast- what does Din… what does Din think?

He remains… silent, removing your second boot without a word.

“That man you kissed,” he puffs.

You blink… oooooohhh….

Leaning to your side, you pick at a loose thread on the bed. “He’s a… friend.”

“Looked like more than a friend,” the grumble slips beneath his helm. He stands, flicks a hand at you.

“Get out of those clothes.”

Thank the Maker- a topic change!

With a heavy sigh, you march yourself over to his drawers. You didn’t have to ask- you’re well beyond the asking stage.

“Mando?” you toss over your shoulder. “Um…What’s your favorite color?”

…

“Red.”

…

You can do red.

Snatching a scarlet flannel from the drawer, you slam it shut- sweeping into the refresher to change. As you remove your grimy clothes, you stare in the mirror at the scars- the marks on your forearm.

“You know, Mando,” you shout through the closed door, forcing your eyes away from the baggage of your past. “Do you ever wonder what your life would be like if the world hadn’t imploded under your feet as a kid? I know I do.”

Talking comes easier when you can’t see him….

…

Footsteps… shuffling… drawers opening and closing-

“Working my father’s trade…” Silence. “He was… a carpenter.”

Your fingers pause mid-buttoning. “Sounds… peaceful.” Unlike bounty hunting, goes unsaid.

“I think-” you reach for a towel- “that I’d have left Sularia, for sure. As much as I loved it…”

As much as you miss it…

“…There wasn’t much to do in the mountains except get married, have kids, chase kids, heard animals, shovel snow, fucking yodel… you get the picture.”

The door snaps open, and you press the side of your face against the doorframe. “I’ve always craved excitement, much to my parent’s displeasure…”

There he is- Din- sitting on the side of the bed… watching you.

He tilts his head forward- leans against his thighs. “I’d say you found yourself that excitement,” he snorts.

Understatement of the year.

Aches mixing with your exhaustion, you release a pained groan as you ease next to him on the bed. Body sinking in on itself, you brush, lean against his side.

Safe.

Safe.

Safe.

“Will you leave us again?”

His voice is but a whisper.

 “If I left-” you lift your chin, flashing him a small smile- “I’d have to buy my own flannels.”

Silence.

…

He reaches out, tugs on your flannel sleeve.

“Can’t have that.”

…

“Go to sleep.”

A weary smile dusts your lips.

Yes, sir.

…

Scrambling up to the head of the bed, you shove your legs beneath the blankets and flop over to face the wall. Burying deep beneath them, you squeeze your eyes shut.

Blankets lift-

Weight on the mattress-

Heavy sigh-

Blankets pull and drop.

…

Oh kriff, he’s right behind you… Guess that’s how sharing a bed works…

…

Oh kark it.

You blink at the wall.

…

Time to make things weird.

“Roll over!” you shout, flinging up out of the bed. Din jolts back- startled by your outburst.

“W-what-?” He pulls the blankets up to his neck.

“MOVE!”

You yank on his arm- forcing him to roll over.

You can’t help but giggle as he obliges.

See? You don’t have to spend all night worrying about accidently touching him if you’re already touching him.

Life hack.

Now that Din’s properly flopped over and facing you in the bed, you crawl back under the blankets. You tug on his exposed arm- snaking it across your middle. You wiggle backwards until your back is pressed, squashed against his chest.

…

…

“Din?”

…

…

“Yeah?”

…

…

…

“This okay?”

…

…

…

His hand creeps up your hip, splays across your stomach.

…

“Yeah.”

…

…

…

“Then loosen up.”

…

…

“I am loose.”

…

…

“Goodnight, Din.”

…

…

“Goodnight, Ka’r’ika.”

…………

………

……

…

…

Guns-for-days holy shit-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

masterlist / previous chapter / next chapter

taglist: (in the reblog)

a/n: Oooooh boy. With a chapter this long, there’s a LOT I could say! I am reaaaaallly nervous for this one hsjdhdhd. Feel free to ask me anything in the comments so I can address specific topics! For now, I’ll just say things such as Din’s reaction to Boba taking his helmet off, Fennec still be alive, etc. will be addressed next chapter. 

Chapter ten really came so easily yet so hard at the same time. I put a LOT of time and love into this fic... So, if you, too, find any sort of enjoyment from it, I’d love to hear about it! I have made so many kind friends through this story. I love hearing from you!

And heh, things be heating up in this chapter, hm??? 👀 Any thoughts/theories??

Anyway... I’m sure I’ll think of things later I’ll wish I’d said... but for now... I hope you enjoyed!!!

[markberries]

j u s t  f r i e n d s┊cedric diggory

anons requested:

HIII :) i havent seen that much cedric fluff/smut lol cedric is literally my comfort character 🤠 if ur requests are open could you write a fluff/smut? i literally dont mind what kind i just WANT MORE CEDRIC FANFICTION CAUSE THERE IS BARELY ANYYY :((

HellO! I love ur work can I request you make like a Cedric x F reader hufflepuff, friends to lovers, fluff and smut. I know it's vv vague but go off. I just want cedric content i love him sm :,)

info:  cedric diggory was your best friend, nothing more, but when he tells you about an upcoming date, you start to question that.

genre: fluff, some angst, SMUT, fem reader, hufflepuff reader, friends to lovers

warnings: so much smut, oral (receiving), cursing

word count: 5.7k+

a/n: HIIIII i was able to complete 2 reqs in 1! this was long overdue but i hope you like it,, also i edited the first half and just gave up on the second half GHFHJFSG

cedric diggory was your best friend.

he smelt of vanilla, his voice warm, flowing smoothly like honey. his presence gave you a sense of comfort, almost as if he was home. his eyes were a slight grey, full of wonder, color like a foggy autumn night, or the clouds that filled the sky on the day you two had met. his brown hair, always effortlessly styled, never failing to make girls swoon when he ran his fingers through it. and his smile — god, his smile.

adored by most and kind to all, you truly believed that cedric diggory deserved the world. it was impossible for any girl to get a glimpse of him and not feel their heart flutter.

the good-natured overachiever was your best friend because you hadn’t developed any romantic feelings for him, despite his good looks and unforgettable, lovable attitude. you knew that you wouldn’t have been friends with him in the first place if you felt the same way as the hundreds of other girls who yearned for cedric diggory, so the day he told you that he had a date, you were unsure of why there was a slight pang of pain that struck your heart.

“finally,” you sighed in relief, a playful tone hidden in your voice as you wiped fake sweat off of your forehead. the sound of your heartbeat felt like it was louder than the crackling of the hufflepuff common room’s fireplace, and you weren’t sure if it was in your head or not.

the both of you sat on the snug fabric couch that was placed right in front of the small flames, the cushions soft. cedric shoved you playfully, making you jokingly hold your arm in pain. cedric muttered a “shut up,” a smile on his face as he looked down in his lap. you stuck your tongue out at him, scrunching up your nose.

the fidgeting of your fingers went unnoticed as you smiled at him, a sense of dread washing over you as you began to think about how his date might go. you remained unassertive of why these negative emotions swallowed you whole, reassuring yourself that it was probably just because you were afraid of losing your best friend.

“seriously though, i’m really happy for you,” you say, patting his shoulder lightly. somewhere in the back of your mind, you knew were lying, you knew that you wanted to say “please, don’t go on that date,” but you ignored it. 

“i just don’t know what to do! or wear, or say,” he complained, waving his arms around, before falling back and relaxing on the couch. “do you think i’ll mess this up?”

no cedric, you’re perfect.

“yeah, you’re an idiot,” you lie, making cedric kick your leg. “you know i’m only joking, if you want, i’ll help you choose an outfit.”

cedric shot up, his hands on either side of his body as he looked at you with joy filled eyes. 

“really? you’ll help me?”

you laugh, “that’s what friends are for, idiot.”

you hated every bit of how your conversation was going. you felt like the more you two discussed about his upcoming date with cho chang, the longer that stinging pain stuck to you. you didn’t know what you wanted to do, you didn’t know if you wanted to cry, scream, yell, it was all left a mystery to you as cedric’s excited voice talked about how amazing cho was.

“she’s smart — and i mean, smart smart; and beautiful, wow, she really is beautiful. i’ve never met someone like her.”

you continued to smile and nod, enduring the ache that stayed with you the entire time. before, you were confident that you would never gain feelings for cedric, but now, you weren’t so reliant of your previous beliefs as the lurking torment hit you.

“well, can you blame her? she’s a ravenclaw,” you gave him a nonchalant reply, crossing your legs as you played with your wand.

“but she’s different, you know?” he went on and on, while you had an internal battle with yourself. you thought you were different. you hoped that you were different. but, you guessed, not to cedric.

“i’m getting tired,” you yawned, trying to get yourself out of this situation. you weren’t really tired, you just didn’t want to hear anymore of cedric talking about how cho was his dream girl. you wished that he would talk about you like he did her.

“really? it’s only eight o’clock,” he raised an eyebrow at you, smirking. you nodded, stretching your arms and standing up. you stood in your penguin pajama pants and an oversized tee, waving to him.

“i’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay? and i’ll help you with your date,” you say, regretting the statement you made about how you would assist him in preparing for his date. 

“wait!” he quickly stood up, walking towards you and wrapping his arms around you for a hug. you froze for a moment, before melting into his touch. “thank you, y/n, for being such an amazing best friend.”

he placed his chin on the top of your head, while you buried your face into his shoulder.

“of course.”

while you headed up to bed, your loud thoughts echoed throughout your mind. you were rubbing your eyes, stifling your soft cries so you wouldn’t wake up your roommate. you crawled into your bed, wrapping the blanket around you, silent cries escaping your lips.

it was like a cliche love story, the girl finally realizes she has been in love with her best friend this entire time, only to be met with unintentional rejection. it hurt, of course it hurt. you were beginning to register that you wanted be cedric’s, you wanted him to be yours, but it was impossible. he had eyes on another.

—

the next day was even more dreadful than the previous, you woke up in a bad mood, lazily putting on your uniform and making your way to breakfast. cedric was quick to catch you on the way there, attempting to scare you from behind.

“boo!”

you turned and slapped cedric, who now, regretted his horrible effort to spook you. 

“don’t do that!” you whisper-shouted at him, and he raised his hands, surrendering. “sorry, sorry. forgot about last year.”

last year, you repeatedly told cedric about how much you hated being jump scared. it was no surprise that the idiot had forgotten. you giggled, cedric infamous laugh following your own. he began to walk side by side with you, continuing your conversation from yesterday.

“so.... you’re still going to help me, right?”

you wished you could say no, you wanted so badly to say no, but you knew you couldn’t. his happiness counted too, not just your own.

“with your fashion sense? do you think i have a choice?” you teased, squinting your eyes at him. you two entered the dining hall, every student was talking to another, some girls watching you and cedric walk by. you spotted cho across the room, cedric also seeing her. he waved at her, a smile on his face as she waved back.

you sighed internally, sitting down at the dining table. cedric sat down as well, but still kept his eyes on cho.

“what the hell are you doing?” you asked, grabbing an apple on the table. 

“me? nothing,” he replied back, resting his head on his hand as he stared at her in awe, you were tempted to slap him again, but you held back that said urge. your fingers traced the creases in the wood as your best friend eyed his crush, and you wanted nothing more than to leave the room.

“hey y/n are-”

“yes, i get it. cho is beautiful. she’s smart. i heard you the first thousand times.”

you turned to glare at cedric, who was looking at you, concerned. “no, i was going to ask if you were okay.”

your cheeks turned a light pink as you felt butterflies erupting in your stomach. you smiled at him, “sorry. just a little tired, i didn’t get much sleep. i’m alright.”

it was a half-lie, but you couldn’t risk telling cedric the truth. you were so sure that it would be the end of your amazing friendship, he would never look at you the same, and you weren’t sure if you could get over your feelings. you were stuck, in this in-between state of mind, one side of you begging to let your confession out, while the other just stayed quiet.

so yes, you caved into yourself and lied, but your only problem was that cedric knew that you were lying. there was no way of hiding it from your best friend, even if you thought you were concealing it well.

“hey cedric.”

the voice of the seemingly irritating asian ravenclaw snapped you out of your thoughts, and you immediately pivoted your head to look at her. cedric was already standing, looking at cho.

“hey y/n,” she smiled at you, and you replied back with a small awkward wave of your hand, a fake smile on your face before you turned back around to roll your eyes. your face scrunched up, biting into your apple as the two lovebirds talked behind you.

every word that came out of her mouth, every compliment he gave her, every giggle you heard, it made you want to turn around and walk out. jealousy was an ugly emotion, and you never thought that you’d actually get a chance to experience it, but here you were, annoyed out of your mind.

you waited for what felt like hours, for their talking to be over (it was really only a few minutes), time felt especially slow when they began to flirt about their upcoming date tonight.

“so, i’ll see you after classes then?” cedric asked her, tucking her hair behind her ear.

“of course.”

cedric watched her walk away, gazing at her with those ever so beautiful eyes of his, taking a deep breath before sitting back down.

by the time cedric sat down, you were already getting up from the table, with a loss of apetite. cedric glanced at the single bite you took out of your apple, then glancing back up at you.

“hey, how do you expect to grow if you don’t eat?” he joked, earning a pissed off face from you, who only said, “i’m not hungry.”

you walked off without him, muttering to yourself meaningless thoughts. although cedric was worried about your sudden shift of attitude and demeanor, he decided to leave you some time to yourself.

you were already halfway to class, wondering what the hell you had done in your past life to receive this emotional torture. you groaned, looking down at your shoes. 

“you alright there, y/n?” a familiar voice called out to you, running up to you. it was ron weasley, an idiot, but a good friend of yours. you turned your head to him, saying, “no, i’m not.”

“spit it out, then,” ron says, lightly bumping shoulders with you. you let out an exhale, grasping at your wand in your right hand, your tote bag slung over your left shoulder. “are you going to take all day? i want to at least make it to potions before snape sends me to detention again.”

“fine, fine,” you whine to him, “you know cedric?”

“no — is that a food? are you mad? everyone knows cedric,” he exclaims. “there’s no one in this bloody school who doesn’t know who he is.”

you sneer, pinching his arm while he cries out a small “ow”. 

“so,” you start, avoiding eye contact so you wouldn’t have to see ron’s reaction. “him and cho have a date tonight. i know, not a big deal, but you see, i kind of started to fancy him.”

“i knew it.”

“be quiet.”

ron lets out a snicker at your quick reply, but he shuts himself up as you snap your head at him to give him a death glare. 

“are you planning on telling diggory at all?” he questions, and you immediately shake your head, your eyes wide, imagining everything that could go wrong.

“what would he think of me? it would make the situation much worse,” you explain to him, and he nods, trying to understand how you were currently feeling. 

approaching his potions class, ron gives your arm a little squeeze.

“well you know, someone must find you attractive, even someone as ugly as y-” his voice is cut off by you kicking him in the shin, and he yelps out, while you giggle. 

“get to class.”

your face drops when you hear cho’s and cedric’s voices echoing behind you, and you feel a part of your heart clench. it doesn’t take you long to walk as fast as you can so they don’t spot you, your shoes clicking against the concrete floor.

—

“how’s this?”

cedric stood in front of you with a white dress shirt, black dress pants, with a black leather belt wrapped around the waist. his shiny black shoes tapping against the floor anxiously, the sleeves of his shirt neatly rolled up. he put a slight amount of gel in his hair, he looked amazing.

if anything, the more you stared at him, the more you regretted offering to help him get dressed for his outing. your stomach did twists and turns as his eyes bored into your own, searching for approval.

he had a nervous smile on his face, the kind of smile you wished you had caused. you wanted nothing more than to be happy for him, for he had finally found a girl he actually liked. the only thing that had you upset, was that you weren’t that girl.

“you look,” you pause for a moment, taking him in. you gained a whiff of his natural scent, before exhaling slowly.

“stupid.”

his eyes widen in horror, rushing to go find new clothes. you erupt in chuckles, grabbing his arm.

“i’m just kidding, you look great, now go!” you exclaim, but cedric freezes, sitting down on his bed. he looks like he’s in thought, but his exact mindset wasn’t clear to you.

you sit down next to him, the bed cushion sinking. placing a hand on his shoulder, you ask him, “are you alright?”

“i don’t know, i’ve just never really felt like this for someone, i feel like i’ll mess it up,” his head turns to you, with a neutral facial expression. “what if i do something wrong? do you think she’ll stop liking me?”

“listen to me diggory, every girl i know has a tiny crush on you, i’m sure cho is crazy about you, and i doubt that there’s anything you can possibly do to mess tonight up,” you beam, patting his back. “unless you kill her.”

“i just don’t want to miss my chance with someone like her.”

there’s something that hits you when cedric says that — maybe it’s the fact that cedric would never see you in a romantic way is finally setting in, or the thought of never being able to compare to a girl like cho, or maybe you’re finally understanding you have been in love with cedric for longer than you thought, or maybe it was all of those reasons. something makes you want to crash into a fit of sobs, or maybe a chorus of silent cries.

for cedric’s happiness, you decide it was better to hide you’re sadness, that was slowly eating you up bit by bit, or at least, attempt to hide it.

“trust me, i’m sure she’ll love every bit of tonight. and if she doesn’t, well, i can surely take her head on.”

and here came his beautiful, mesmerizing, bright grin. he enveloped you into a hug, smiling to himself. “you really are my best friend.”

“yeah, i am, aren’t i?”

he lets go, standing up from his previous spot on the bed, dusting off his shirt.

“time to go, diggory,” you say to him, pushing him out the room, the door making a slight creak as you open it.

“thank you, y/n,” he grins, and you shut the door, but not before pressuring him to leave faster. your back is pressed against the cool wooden material as you slide down it slowly, burying your face in your hands as you are being swallowed whole by the everlasting feeling of unwanted rejection.

although cedric had no clue that he had technically rejected you, there was still a fresh feeling of heartbreak within you.

you felt vulnerable, like you were out of control, and that you couldn’t change anything.

there were so many thoughts running through your mind, you barely realized that you had got up and reached for the door handle, twisting it open, and pacing down the hall to where cedric was walking.

before realizing what you were doing, you grabbed cedric by the wrist, making him turn to you. you cut him off in the middle of saying your name, pressing your soft lips against his own.

you screwed your eyes shut, unaware of your own actions, while cedric stood there, eyes wide open in shock. he was frozen, unbeknownst of what to do.

when you slowly backed away from him, you swear you just wanted someone to put you out of your misery, right there. cedric was sputtering words, trying to form a proper sentence, while you were on the verge of tears.

“o-oh my god, i didn’t- shit, i’m so sorry cedric,” you were shaking, bringing your hands to cover your mouth, “just go on your date. this was a mistake- i uh, i’ve got to go.”

you took off fast walking to your dorm, trying your best to forget about the moment that happened seconds before. the adrenaline that was previously pumping through your veins was slowly beginning to wear off as you slammed your dorm room’s door shut, you let out a quiet wail. you quickly got yourself under the covers, gripping at the cotton sheets.

that night, you barely got any sleep, as the only thing keeping you awake was the thought of tomorrow.

—

there’s a soft knock on your door the following day, and you immediately huff in frustration, burying your head further into your pillow.

“go away!” you shout, your voice muffled by the fabric. ron calls your name from behind the wooden walls, ushering you to let him in.

“you can’t just stay in there forever!”

“yes i can, watch me,” you say back, hearing the door opening, followed by ron’s footsteps. he pokes you, repeatedly, purposely trying to irritate you.

“the professors are going to kill you if you don’t show up to your classes,” he scolded. you turn to look at him, the left side of your face still in the pillow. grabbing another pillow beside you, you toss it at his face.

“i don’t care,” you huff, finally turning over to lay on your back. “leave me alone, weasley.”

“i brought you something to eat, you can’t starve yourself,” he muttered, placing a plate of food on your nightstand. the sun shined bright into your window, birds chirping from the school grounds.

ron sighed, “could you at least tell me what happened?”

you gulp, frowning.

“i kissed cedric.”

“could you repeat that one more time?”

“i... kissed... cedric. right before he left for his date.”

“huh!?” ron squeaked, standing up. “what happened to the whole ‘i’m not telling him’ thing?”

“i know!” you snivelled, the feeling of guilt overwhelming you. “i really don’t know what i was thinking.. i just can’t face him right now.”

as if he was right on time, you hear cedric call your name from behind your dorm room door. he’s about to turn the knob, but you jump out of bed to prevent him from opening it.

“please let me in,” he says softly, his forehead pressed against the wood. “we really need to talk.”

“there’s nothing i want to talk about, diggory,” you say back, and ron laughs at your current struggle.

“ron, i swear to god-“

“weasley is in there with you? please, let me in!” cedric tries his best to convince ron to get you out of the way, but you’re prepared to throw the plate of food that ron had gotten you, and ron was not risking that.

“y/n-“

“i don’t want to talk, okay? please leave.”

the room goes quiet for a moment, no talking, no giggles from ron, it’s simply just silent. you hear cedric audibly sigh, before walking away.

you can imagine cedric’s distressed face as his frustration is always visible, and you really wanted nothing more than to go out and hug him, but you couldn’t. not after last night.

“you really do need to talk to him, though,” ron comments as you breathe heavily.

“i-i know, just not yet.”

—

hours after waking up from your hell-induced “sleep”, you finally got the energy to go to your last period, as you had told your professors from earlier classes that you were in terrible condition (you told them you had gotten food poisoning), and they were surprisingly, understanding.

you were battling with the ideas of speaking to diggory or never facing him again, and to be honest, you were liking the latter option a lot more than the first.

each time you spotted him through the day, there was something that felt like a small pinch within you, followed by a longing to talk to him again. you would quickly avert your eyes, or rush to make sure you weren’t in his line of sight, either way, you felt empty.

the worse was when you had just got out of class, only to walk a few steps down the hall, to see him talking to cho, taking her hands into his own, a soft expression on his face as he spoke to her. it’s almost like you could hear an audible shatter come from your heart. you shut your eyes, turning back to the way you came, your head hanging low.

you were so exhausted, physically and emotionally. dodging cedric at all costs, studying for upcoming tests, and losing hope in regaining your friendship with him.

you walked to the gryffindor common room to rant to ron, as he seemed like the only person you could talk to right now.

“i see you actually got out of bed,” he comments, leaning back on the red sofa. you placed your bag on the coffee table, plopping down next to him.

“surprising, right?” you say sarcastically. “but i didn’t come here to be criticized by you.”

you cross your arms over your chest, placing yourself deep in thought as you tried to calm yourself down. you rubbed your temples, trying to think of some sort of solution to end your torture.

“talked to diggory yet?” he asks, writing something down in his notebook. your posture becomes rigid, a pinched expression on your face as you shake your head “no”.

“y/n.. you have to at least to explain to him about what happened last night.”

your fingers begin to fidget, and you stare down at them. “i don’t even know what i was thinking, to be honest. so what am i supposed to tell him?”

“well,” ron trails, “you can start by saying that you like-”

ron doesn’t get to finish his sentence, as someone shouts his name from beyond the gryffindor common room. you immediately recognize the voice, scrambling to hide behind the couch as to not be seen.

seconds later, cedric comes in, a bothered look im his eyes as he approaches the red haired boy.

“hey ron, have you talked to y/n at all?” he asks him, his hair disheveled as you take a peek from behind the couch. he still looked amazing to you.

“yeah i have,” ron replies, nodding, but it’s tight — as if he’s holding something he wants to say back, and cedric is quick to notice it. he’s always been able to see those tiny details hidden behind a person’s actions.

“uh, okay.. and do you know where she is?”

ron looks to the couch, then back at cedric, “yeah, she’s behind the couch hiding from you.”

you freeze, your eyes going wide. you slowly stand up, awkwardly scratching the back of you neck, followed by nervous laughter. 

“h-hey! i was just leaving,” you’re at a loss for words, eyeing both cedric and ron. you let out another uncomfortable “haha”, before darting towards the door. cedric is yelling your name, following close behind. you’re able to make it towards your doom room, where luckily, your roommate was too busy having a sleepover with another hufflepuff to be there.

“y/n!” cedric catches the door before you’re able to close it, forcing himself inside. you swiftly turn around to face him, staring intently. your hands were clenched into fists, your legs barely being able to keep you up as you felt something weaken in your knees.

“we need to talk,” he says, sternly. your face is a bright red, almost at a loss for words.

“what’s there to say?” you retort, crossing your arms, then sitting on your bed. you try your best to avert your gaze from his, staring at anything but his face.

“please, y/n,” cedric pleads, taking a step closer to you. “what happened last night?”

“it’s really not important, cedric,” your breath hitches, as he was standing directly in front of you. you gathered the courage to look into his eyes, regretting it almost immediately, for they were filled with sorrow, glimmering within the cold moonlight.

the light of the bedroom remained off, you were sure that if you saw cedric’s face properly, you would lose the ability to speak.

“you can’t keep running away,” he tells you, placing a hand on your shoulder and bending down so he was at eye level with you.

you shrug his hand off, crossing your arms, “who said i was running?”

“y/n,” he starts with a small chuckle, “you just sprinted away from me a minute ago.”

“but the reason i chased after you was because we need to speak about the kiss.”

your body becomes stiff, you wanted to curl into a ball on the spot, biting your lip.

“we can’t.”

he sits next to you, taking your hands into his. “but why not? there isn’t any reason for us to not speak-“

“because,” you say in a small voice, “you like cho. she likes you. i don’t want to be the one to ruin that. it’s selfish, i know, but you deserve her.”

cedric stands, running a hand through his hair. “but that’s the thing, y/n! i don’t know anymore. i don’t know who i like — if i even really like cho after last night, it’s just so... confusing.”

“how the hell is it confusing?” you question him.

“don’t you understand? everything is just so, mixed up. after you kissed me, during my entire night, i couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

you feel the tip of your ears grow warm as the pace of your heartbeat grew.

“cedric—”

“please listen to me. think about how i feel right now. i liked you for at least six months, but you always told me the reason we were friends was because of the lack of romanticism between us, so i moved on, i mean, i tried to. but then, that kiss. it just changed so much, and i didn’t know what to tell cho—“

“weren’t you talking to her today? i saw you two together,” he continues pacing the wooden floors, stressed.

“i needed to tell her that things were complicated and about how i didn’t think she was right for me,” he tells you, and you stand up to poke him playfully in the chest, as if nothing was going on.

“you,” poke.

“did,” poke.

“what!?” poke.

“i, uh, um..” he doesn’t know what to say, frantically searching for the right words, but then throwing his hands up in defeat.

“it would be better if i just did this,” within seconds, he’s cupping your face, pressing his plump lips onto yours. they tasted of his fruity chapstick, and you liked the way he moved.

finally, you registered that diggory was actually kissing you. he was the one that initiated it, he was the one running his hands down your body as your hands gripped at his brown locks.

he bites your lip, and you let out a small mewl. he slips his tongue in, dominating against your own, all while removing his robe. he backs up, keeping your lips locked while shutting the door.

you remove your own robe, palming the bulge in his pants. he groans into your mouth, the wetness building in your heat.

he’s quick to switch the roles, your back on the door instead of his. he breaks from the kiss, panting. your foreheads rest against each others, staring into each others’ eyes.

“i need you to tell me,” he says in between breaths, his skin glowing in the moonlight. “do you want this?”

you nod desperately, “yes.”

“good, because i do too.”

he grabs you by the waist, picking you up to toss you on the bed. he’s standing over you, looking down at you with a smug smirk on his face, before peeling off his top.

“enjoying the view?” he raises a brow, and you can’t help but let out a laugh.

“mhm, i guess i’m next,” you reply, sitting up to unbutton your shirt. you make sure to begin slowly, cedric watching your fingers intently. you part your lips, removing the sticky clothing, leaving you in your undergarments and your skirt.

you bite your lip, looking up at him. he brings his lips to your ear, dragging his finger down your cleavage. “i need you to do something for me, baby. i need you to take off everything so i can make you feel good, is that okay?”

your stomach begins to do somersaults, and you comply to cedric with no hesitations, dragging the black fabric of your skirt down and tossing it somewhere in the room. next, you unclip your black bra and take off your panties, throwing them in the general direction of your skirt.

he admires you, who’s now laying down on the bed. you grow a little shy, but remind yourself that this is cedric, this is your best friend. he lowers himself to face your pussy, dragging his finger through your folds.

“let me take care of you, baby.”

with that, he trails a stripe through your heat with his tongue, a quiet moan escaping your lips.

“you’re so cute, writhing from just a bit of contact,” he grins, his hot breath fanning against you. “now what if i did this—“

he places his lips against your clit, sucking gently.

“cedric— ah,” you say, and he moans against you. he sucks harder this time, bringing his hand to your entrance, he sticks a finger inside at the same time.

“oh god,” you sigh, arching your back. you bring a hand to cedric’s hair, the other hand gripping at the sheets under you. his teeth grazes your bundle of nerves, making you shiver. the feeling of his mouth against you was addicting, his finger moving in and out of you at a fast pace combining with that lead to a familiar building up of pleasure within you.

“cedric, p-please,” you mewl, his free hand holding one of your thighs. you began to feel warm, crying out the boy’s name over and over again.

“come, baby.”

your body went stiff, your orgasm washing over you as you began to relax. your breathing was heavy as cedric stood up, looking at you. you smiled, shutting your eyes.

“can you do it one more time?” you hear him ask, and you swallow, nodding your head.

“yes i can.”

he began reaching for the emergency condom hidden in his back pocket, undoing his belt, the sound of the metal buckle hitting the floor as he kicked his pants and boxers off. he ripped the foil open with his teeth, rolling it on the tip. you opened your eyes, watching as he crawled on top of you.

he smiles, kissing your forehead with a loving look in his eyes. “ready?”

you wrap your arms around his neck, leaning up to kiss him. “whenever you are.”

finally, he begins to enter you, slowly, making sure it isn’t painful. you moan loudly, your eyes rolling to the back of your head. you didn’t care about how sensitive you were from your previous orgasm, all you could think about was how good you felt. his dick reached deep inside of you, expanding your pulsing walls.

he took this as a cue to movs, creating a steady pace as he let out a breathy groan every time he thrusted.

“fuck, you feel so good,” he praised, thrusting deeper. he would pull all the way out, before slamming back in. his hands were on either side of your head.

you were overwhelmed with pleasure, moaning his name and gasping when he would go deeper than expected. he whispered filth into your ear, talking quietly about how much he enjoyed fucking you, or how beautiful you looked under him.

your sinful cries bounced off the walls, sweat dripping down your bodies. you began preparing for his orgasm, as well as your own as he sped up. you clenched around his dick, making him groan louder. you threw your head back, your hips moving to meet his thrusts.

“holy shit, oh fuck, i’m gonna come,” he growled, kissing you hungrily. you moaned his name into the kiss, digging your fingernails into his back. he buried his head into the crook of your neck, shouting curses as the two of you lost yourselves in an erruption of bliss, only thinking about each other. your cries of his name was a symphony to his ears as he thrusted one last time, moaning loudly.

it ended in heavy breathing and gasps for air as he turned over to lay beside you. cedric removes the condom, tossing it onto the ground. he looks over to you, who was already looking at him.

“does this mean you like me?” you ask, and he lets out his amazing laugh.

“yes, i like you.”

you smile, “also i had no idea you could do that.”

“neither did i.”

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

Dogwarts Angst prompt: With so many out for his blood, Martyn needs power and protection so, what does he do? Mutiny, he slays his king in a way that gets him no suspicions and claims it was another faction (prob the desert given they have a gunpowder farm). Then, uses Ren as a martyr and symbol ("for our fallen king!") to gain the loyalty of the Red Army...HIS army...

this was so painful to write asdfghjkl not because it’s bad but bc i love loyal Martyn too much and the idea of him betraying Ren is horrible lol

...

It’s nearing sunset and Martyn and Ren are out for a walk near their base. Martyn is sweating a little; he has a plan and everything has to go just right or his life will be over. Ren has already asked a few questions but at least he seemed mostly satisfied with Martyn’s answers.

“You alright, there, Martyn?” says Ren after a while. “You seem to be looking around a lot.”

“Having a bounty on my head is making me a little nervous,” responds Martyn. “I love being wanted but it really makes a guy paranoid.”

Ren smiles sympathetically at him. “Understandable. I never thought-.”

“Wait!” Martyn gasps involuntarily, spotting the thin tripwire he set up, only just visible through the trees. “I-I think I see someone. Quickly!”

He takes off towards the trees, with Ren just behind him. Hopping over the tripwire, he hides behind another tree a few blocks away until he hears Ren yelp, “Martyn, I just tripped on something!”

Martyn immediately dashes for cover, leaving Ren behind.

The last thing he hears is Ren yelling his name, before the world explodes around him.

Luckily, Martyn is far enough away that the explosions only knock him lightly off his feet. Hurriedly getting back up, he rushes back the way he came, to find Ren lying in the centre of the large crater on his back, a small puddle of blood under his head.

Martyn kneels down beside Ren and cradles his head in his lap. Despite his plans, he can’t help feeling a twinge of guilt.

“M-Martyn…” coughs Ren, eyelids fluttering. “Wh…”

“I’m sorry, My Liege,” Martyn starts quietly, before abruptly changing what he was going to say. “I shouldn’t have left your side.”

“It’s okay,” Ren whispers, giving a weak smile, as he reaches up with a shaky hand to touch Martyn’s shoulder. “T-Take my crown. D-Dogwarts is yours, o-okay? Take c-care of it.”

Martyn nods as he carefully takes the crown from Ren. “Of course.”

Ren’s eyes slowly close for the final time and his body disappears.

Renthedog blew up

Martyn sits back on his ankles, allowing himself a minute to cry. He doesn’t hate his plan - he chose this path after all - but he does hate not being honest. He’d been planning to reveal his treachery to Ren just before he died but when it came down to it, he just couldn’t do it. He couldn’t quite force himself to admit that he’d betrayed the man who gave him shelter, a purpose, and the position to be able to take control of arguably the most powerful alliance on the server.

He has made the decision to let Ren go to his grave believing that his dedicated friend was loyal to the end.

And now Martyn must live with that.

He stays there for a while, until he hears a distant voice yelling his name. It’s a friendly voice, so Martyn doesn’t move. This is his chance to start the performance of his life.

Sure enough, Skizz soon appears through the trees, followed closely by Etho. The two skid to a halt as they register the scene: Martyn kneeling in the crater with Ren’s crown in his lap.

“No!” Skizz gasps, rushing to Martyn’s side. “Oh no, are you okay?! What happened?!”

“I… The D-Desert Alliance must’ve trapped the area,” Martyn croaks, forcing himself to act shell-shocked. “I was stupid; I-I left Ren’s side to scout ahead. By the time I heard the TNT hissing, it was t-too late to save him.”

“Oh my god…” Skizz hugs Martyn tightly. “I’m so sorry. Are you hurt?”

“N-No, I was far enough away from the explosion.” Martyn clutches the crown as if his life depends on it. “I… What do we do now…?”

“Now, you gotta take over as the red king,” Skizz says, exactly as Martyn hoped. “Ren gave you his crown, right? He wanted you to take over for him.”

Martyn clears his throat. “Yeah… you’re right. We have to avenge Ren.”

Skizz nods, his eyes flashing red. “They gotta pay for what they did to our king, Martyn. I need to make them pay.”

“Me too,” responds Martyn. “For Ren."

…

When they get back to Dogwarts, the sun has long since set. Martyn is standing on the altar, holding Ren’s sword. He can’t stop thinking about Ren, as he’s sure none of his team can. But he knows it’s for very different reasons.

“Hey,” says Skizz’s voice gently from behind him. “You should get some sleep. It’s been a rough day.”

Martyn nods slowly. “I know, I just… I’m a little nervous.”

Skizz moves to his side and places his hand on Martyn’s shoulder. “It’s okay, Martyn. You know we’ll all protect you, right? You’re our new king; we’ll protect you with our lives, no matter how many stupid bounties are on your head.”

“Thanks, Skizz. I appreciate that.” Martyn can’t quite manage a smile. “Get some sleep. We’re gonna attack the Desert Alliance tomorrow at dawn.”

“Really?” Skizz stares at him. “Do you have a plan?”

“I’ll address everyone properly first thing in the morning.”

“Okay. Night, buddy. I mean… My Liege.”

Martyn carefully watches Skizz go into the building, before heading out towards the gate. His plan is working better than he could have ever imagined. Nobody suspects him. The only person who would even have the capacity to suspect him is-.

“Hey, Martyn.”

Martyn freezes as he hears Etho’s voice. Turning slowly, he spots his ally leaning against the wall, arms folded. “Hi. You startled me.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to.” Etho’s expression is friendly but there’s something underneath, something that makes Martyn uneasy. “I just had a question for you, if that’s okay?”

Martyn turns fully to face Etho. “Shoot.”

“Did you see anyone around when you and Ren were out there, just before the trap went off?” Etho asks. “Anyone at all?”

This feels like a trap to Martyn. The easy thing to do would be to say yes, to tell Etho that he saw someone lurking around. But at the same time, maybe Etho is expecting him to say no. Either way, Martyn risks elevating Etho’s suspicions.

After taking a few seconds to think, he replies, “I thought I did, but I can’t be sure. That’s part of the reason I went ahead; I thought maybe someone was waiting to ambush us.”

“Right, I see.” Etho seems neither satisfied nor dissatisfied with his response. “So. An attack on the Desert Alliance at dawn, huh?”

Martyn nods, realising that Etho heard what he said to Skizz. “My reasoning is they’ll probably be expecting us to be weak and have to spend a few days to regroup after Ren’s loss. They won’t expect an immediate attack.”

“I see. That makes sense. I guess we’d better all get some rest, huh? Including you.”

“Yeah, I’ve just gotta do one thing before I turn in. But by all means, you go ahead.”

“I will,” Etho says. “Night, Martyn.”

“Night.”

Martyn watches Etho go back inside, before heading out to the grave Skizz made for Ren. He kneels in front of it and lays a flower on it.

“Sorry, Ren,” he murmurs. “There’s a new red king now.”

[ineloqueent]

Starstruck: Part 17

Brian May x Fem!Reader

This is Part 17 of a multi-part fic. Click the links below to read the Masterpost, the previous part, or the next part of the fic :)

Masterpost / Part 16 / Part 18

Summary: When studying at Imperial College in the 1970s, your path is crossed by a beautiful boy as much in love with the stars as you.  

Warnings: swearing, sentiments of sadness

Historical Inaccuracies:

SO. This is more of a disclaimer than an inaccuracy. But it’s very important...

I have written Mary’s character on basis of Lucy Boynton’s portrayal of her in Bohemian Rhapsody. I make no assumptions concerning the relationship between Freddie and Mary, and nor do I condone the things Mary has done in the wake of Freddie’s passing. 

Please remember that this is but a fictionalisation. But anyway. I’m not here to talk about that; I’m here to write fanfic. Let’s go! 

Word Count: 2.6k (can i get three cheers for the shortest chapter ever)

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

You found her soon enough. She hadn’t even made it fully up the stairs.

A pitiful sight, she was, sitting with her knees pulled up as she wept quietly into the velvet of her trousers.

“Mary,” you began gently, and she lifted her head.

Her eyes were puffy, and tears had drawn angry red lines down her round cheeks. Her hair, which had previously been up, fell about her face in blonde wisps as her lower lip trembled and her eyes filled anew with tears.

You made your way over to the corner where she sat and she watched you raptly, like a frightened animal. You knelt beside her.

“Hey, what was that all about?”

Mary only shook her head, blinking rapidly in an attempt to stem her tears.

You offered her a hand up, and after a few moments of contemplation, she took it and stood.

She stared at you a moment before rivulets came running down her face again.

“Come on,” you said. “Let’s get some air.”

You led her up the final stairs and pulled open the door at the landing, guiding her outside onto the rooftop terrace.

The night air was cool, and from the heated rush of emotions that still seemed to cloud your mind to the giddiness that still occupied your stomach, the breeze on the roof was one you welcomed.

Mary seemed to relish the sudden cold as well, going as far as to lean out over the railing and close her eyes in the onslaught of the wind.

Thinking that you should probably not allow her to do any leaning given the mental state she was presently in, you came to stand by her side.

“Do you want to tell me about it?”

Anger flashed across her face, and she wiped her eyes with a frustrated air, only more infuriated by the fact that she was crying.

You were about to assure her that she needn’t say anything at all when she blurted,

“I found Freddie with another man.”

“Oh,” you said. You pressed your lips together, trying to gauge how it was you were to handle this.

“I just can’t believe that he’d lie to me.”

You were reminded of Deacy’s comment about Freddie being ‘nearly pathological’ with respect to lying, but that was hardly helpful right now, and you could only imagine the crushing betrayal Mary must have felt.

“I can believe that he would lie,” she elaborated, fingers curling around the railing, “but not to me. I just— oh, I suppose I thought I was different.” She gave a shudder. “I’d had the feeling that something wasn’t quite right, and I tried to talk to him, tried to tell him that he could tell me anything, and that even if I was mad about whatever it was when he told me, I wouldn’t stay that way.”

Mary turned to you, and the wind tossed her hair wildly, and with the way her eyes still ran with saltwater, she seemed a maiden from some sort of Greek tragedy.

“I love him,” she went on. “But I’ve always felt that I loved him more than he loved me. Now I understand why.”

She slumped to the ground again, her expression dark. “I’m not even angry that he didn’t come out to me. I understand that, because how the hell do you begin to tell your fiance that you want to break of the wedding because you’re gay?

“Freddie’s got this kindness, and sometimes, it’s like he’d lie to a court if it meant that he spared the feelings of those he loves. So I guess, in a way, he does love me. I only wish he’d have tried to break it off with me, instead of waiting until I walked in on him.”

She sighed, and you sat down across from her, folding your legs beneath you.

“So, what now?” you asked, because it seemed that Mary had thought a lot about this already.

But she dropped her head to her hands. “That’s the one thing I can’t work out. Where do I go from here?”

“Have you talked to Freddie, properly?”

She shook her head. “It’s going to take me a long time to forgive him. I just hope he knows why I’m angry, and that it’s not because he’s gay.”

There. That was it. That was where she had to go. “Maybe you should tell him that.”

Mary looked at you, her face wrought in scars of mascara and eyeliner. She lifted her chin and nodded. “You’re right.” She chewed her lip a moment. “But not tonight. I don’t think I can do that.”

You nodded in understanding, because with the way sobs had wracked her body, there would be no energy left for her to have a conversation with Freddie without it dissolving into a bitter argument, even with good intentions at heart.

“Y/N, would it be okay if I stayed in your room for the night?”

“So long as you promise me you’ll talk to Freddie tomorrow,” you said. “Don’t leave him wondering.”

“Yeah.”

You stood. “Let’s just go, then. It’s past midnight anyway.”

Later, when Mary was sound asleep on one of the beds, bundled in the various extra blankets you’d scavenged from cupboards, you lay with your eyes wide open. You’d been kept awake by the sounds of the dwindling party upstairs, which had carried on for long after the scene had been abandoned by its host.

You wondered where Freddie had got to.

And where Brian had.

You’d considered going to find him many times, and had even gone so far as to stick your feet out of bed and set them on the cold hardwood floor, but in the end, you’d made up your mind to do what you always did: nothing.

He’d left you standing in the dance hall, without so much as recognition in his eyes for evidence of having kissed you. And now he was going to tell you that he’d meant nothing of it, a rush of emotions in an exhilarated situation, and you couldn’t bear to hear that.

You’d rather be left wondering than have such a finality imposed upon your mind.

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

It had been days, now. They’d been tiptoeing around each other for days.

It was ridiculous to the point where I began to feel the need to take matters into my own hands.

The situation was now ultimately worse than it had been before, because very obviously, something had changed. And I’d wager that something had happened on the first night of tour. They were different now, almost shyer, more fragile in their vulnerability to each other’s charms.

He had pined for her since the late sixties, she had been oblivious since day one, and I doubted that, despite their respectively vast vocabularies, either of them knew the meaning of the verb ‘to converse’. It was all longing looks and unuttered promises, a brush of a hand and staring pensively when the other was unawares.

I was almost offended that they couldn’t pull themselves together, when they were fortunate enough to have each other.

Veronica and Robert would get farther and farther from me as each day of tour escorted us more remotely from London. It hadn’t been an option to bring my wife and our tiny child with us on tour, so I could do nothing now but miss them.

But our two resident idiots, Y/N and Brian, did have each other. And they took it completely for granted.

The open road was quiet and dark, and seemed half-asleep, the trees that blurred past the window swaying to some secret song. A flock of birds streamlined the puffy clouds overhead as the moon greeted the sun in its eternal celestial shift, light yielding light to comfort the earthly beings who feared the darkness. Though I did not fear the dark as such, it was easy to imagine lurking figures between the lone houses by the roads, creeping souls amongst the woods by the road; there was something consuming about this early-morning quiet.

On a stop between Bristol and Cardiff, I left the loos to find Freddie smoking by a payphone, notably absent from the rest of our entourage.

The morning air was chilly, and I wound the scarf around my neck in its second loop, buttoning up my jacket with a shiver. No one was out here other than out of necessity, so I made my way over to Freddie and leaned against the wall beside him.

I turned to face him. “How are you?”

Freddie pursed his lips, tapping ash from his cigarette. “Not at my most fabulous, dear.”

I nodded understandingly, burying my face further into the scarf. “It’s okay, you know. You can’t always be.”

“But that’s why I became Freddie Mercury,” he said quietly, his words nearly carried away by the wind. “I became a legend so I wouldn’t feel like this.”

“Freddie,” I began, “I’m pretty sure being legendary means you have a lot more to feel than you would otherwise.”

He smiled a thin-lipped smile, tossing his spent cigarette into the ashtray mounted atop the rubbish bin. “You are of course right, darling, but right now I’d give anything to feel nothing at all.”

“You don’t mean that.”

Freddie sighed. “I don’t know what I want.”

It was despair in his voice; I recognised it. And I understood it. Because where do you start if you don’t know what you’re working toward?

I placed a hand on his shoulder and he turned his sad brown eyes on me.

“You’re a legend, Freddie,” I reminded him. “You’ve got forever to figure it out, okay?”

He nodded.

“And you can talk to me if you need to.”

“Thank you, Deacy,” he patted my hand. “I think I’ll keep a bit to myself for a while, though, at least until we reach the city.”

“Okay.”

“Now, let’s get out of this cold. I’m freezing my tits off!”

I laughed. “Okay, Freddie.”

And though the open road was quiet and dark and I missed my wife and son, I had my friends. The second half of my family.

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

You ached to kiss Brian again. To wind your fingers through his hair. To hold him close, because with the worry that wove itself through his brow on behalf of Freddie, he looked so lost, so far away, as though he needed someone to bring his floating self to the ground where his thoughts could wander amongst the living, and not dwell up in the sky with that which he had lost.

Perhaps that was why he looked to the stars so often; he’d lost so much, and they were a constant.

He deserved to have something brought back to him. And if you could return to him some of the light in his eyes instead of stealing it away, then nothing in the world would make you happier.

The mornings on the bus were tense, to say the least.

Without discussion, it seemed that you and Brian had established an agreement to keep Mary and Freddie apart until they had the time and privacy in which to talk. But it was a difficult arrangement, given that the tour bus was not exactly spacious. And given that it meant you had to keep your distance from Brian.

Presently, though, you came second to the efforts of protecting Freddie and Mary from themselves, which meant that Brian did as well. So for now, all you could give to him were silent glances and small smiles.

But Brian seemed to have other ideas.

On the leg from Cardiff to Taunton, just as you were getting back on the bus, someone grabbed your hand and pulled you around the corner.

You tensed, whirling around with your other fist raised, your heart hammering.

But your defenses were instantly disarmed, because there was Brian with his mass of curls in disarray from the wind, his lips parted as though he had been about to say something.

“Are you trying to kill me?!” you cried, your heartbeat still in your throat.

“No,” Brian said, “I’m trying to kiss you.”

“You’re—”

He pulled you to him, melding himself against you, and kissed you soundly on the mouth, his arms winding around you. Your response was immediate, and you leaned so far into him that he stumbled. His laughter tickled your lips, a rush of breath over your skin as he clutched you to stop you from falling with him.

But you pushed him against the wall instead, and his hands rose to your cheeks to kiss you more deeply, devouring— senseless. Precisely as you had once wished for him to kiss you.

There were so many things you wanted to say, but it seemed the most of them were covered in how you moved with him, vulnerable and uninhibited, purely driven by the desire to hold him close, to make him understand with your proximity how much it was you cared for him. How much you would never be able to explain the gravity of your affections for him.

Brian reversed your positions and only the existence of the wall and his arms kept you on your feet; you were dizzy with the surge of excitement that withered you where he touched you.

And his touch was everywhere.

His lips moved from your mouth to your jaw, from your jaw to your cheek, to the shell of your ear, and then in a tender trail down your neck. His fingertips fluttered at your sides, warm on your skin, but you shivered, because no one had ever touched you with such a gentleness as this, such desire, such love.

Then abruptly, he pulled back, short of breath and flushed from head to toe, with swollen lips and loose curls sticking up where your fingers had interfered with their natural fall.

The world spun as his eyes flickered between yours.

“I’m sorry if I scared you,” he hummed.

“You did a bit,” you replied. “We’re on the open road. It is sort of scary out here.”

“I’m sorry,” he said again. “I just missed you. I miss you. I feel like we’re apart, you know?”

You nodded mutely.

He asked softly, “We’re not keeping this a secret, are we?”

You couldn’t believe that he was asking, after everything. But you supposed that was how he was, considerate to the point where he doubted himself if the circumstances favoured you.

“Brian,” you said, “I don’t think I could hide the way I look at you if I wanted to.”

A smile flickered across his face.

Then the rain began to pour.

“Come on, back inside,” you said, taking him by the hand.

“Hang on,” he pulled you back. He lingered a moment, gazing at you aimlessly, and he looked at you the way he looked at the stars.

“What?”

Brian cradled your face in his hands. Then he pressed a gentle kiss to your nose, brushed the pad of his thumb over your skin. “I just wanted to look at you.”

You couldn’t help but smile.

“My evening star,” he murmured.

You shook your head, finding it very hard to believe that this man, who spoke so beautifully, was yours. “You’re a poet, Brian.”

His response would have been enough to flood the coldest land with a wealth of warmth, as absolutely as that which blossomed in your chest.

“And you’re my muse.”

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

A/N: two more parts and an epilogue m’dears :)

taglist: @melting-obelisks @retropetalss @hgmercury39​ @topsecretdeacon @joemazzmatazz @perriwiinkle @brianmays-hair @im-an-adult-ish @ilikebigstucks @doing-albri @killer-queen-87 @n0-self-c0ntro1 @archaicmusings @cloudyyspace @annina-96 @themarchoftherainbowqueen @annajolras​

Masterpost / Part 16 / Part 18

[zarcake-writes]

Zaxos

This story features an alien lizard and a female scientist tasked with studying him. 

Warnings: lemon mentions (nothing too graphic)

The base is so quiet and empty that it’s unsettling. Most of the scientists, assistants, and clerks went home hours ago. The only people who are still around are either asleep on their desks or too engrossed in their work to notice anyone. The armed guards stand at attention in the hallways and specific doors, looking as intimidating as always. A closer inspection, however, reveals that many of them have zoned out or are falling asleep standing up.

During the day, the base is abuzz with life. The hallways are filled with people coming and going. Most of the doors are opened, revealing labs and people at work. Voices echo along the halls, the intercom goes off regularly, and people are eager to speak with each other.

At night the base is the complete opposite. Being here at night has always freaked you out. The combination of long, empty hallways and artificial lights remind you of a bad horror movie.

Exhaustion tugs at you, your eyes hurt from reading files all day, your hand is stiff from writing, and your lower back aches from sitting on an uncomfortable chair all day. There’s a smudge on your glasses, but the papers and files in your hands prevent you from cleaning them.

A quick right and you end up down another hall. This one is short and at the end stands two armed guards. Unlike most of the other sleepy guards on base, these two are alert and ready. With stern faces, clenched jaws, and narrowed eyes, they take you in.

While both of them are intimidating, you know the older guard. His eyes are dark and there’s a bit of white in his stubble. While he’s still on alert, there’s an amused look in his eyes and the beginning of a smile on his face. The other guard, well, you don’t like him. He’s younger, with eyes so pale they border on the unnatural. He reminds you of a bully, always glaring down at you and never speaking.

“I have clearance for this area. Doctor Miller has requested these papers to be placed on his desk,” you said. A quick flash of your badge reveals you have level five clearance.

The older guard with dark eyes takes the badge and pretends to examine it closely. He does this every time you show it to him. “A bit late for leaving papers on desks, isn’t it?” While his face is stern, he sounds almost teasing.

You scoff. “Nothing is ever too late for Doctor Miller. The man called me once, at three in the morning, asking me about some a report from two years before. When I told him how late it was, he was surprised. The man never sleeps, and in turn, neither do his assistants.”

The guard with dark eyes laughs and nods his head. “That sounds like Doctor Miller.”

“Knowing him, this simple delivery will turn into me inputting numbers and triple checking data. My luck, I’ll be here all night.”

The dark-eyed guard gives you a sympathetic look and motions for the other guard to open the door. The pale-eyed guard opens the door, his eyes never leave you, and his glare deepens. You do your best to ignore the unpleasant prickling feeling on the back of your neck.

“Well, hopefully, you’ll be out of there soon,” the dark-eyed guard said.

“Let’s hope.”

You nod politely and walk through the door. The feeling of being watched doesn’t leave you until the metal door shuts behind you with an audible click. Something about that pale-eyed guard makes you nervous. The hairs on the back of your neck always stand on end, and your gut tells you to avoid him at all costs.

It can mean anything, right? While he comes across as a dick, he’s just a normal person. All the guards on base are normal people, sure some of them are assholes, but they’re like you. Humans stuck working on this base, not knowing what truly goes on here. That’s one thing everyone on base has in common. No one knows what truly happens on this base or what secrets are hidden away behind locked metal doors. There are whispers and rumors of things that happen, deaths that are ruled as accidents, and disappearances that are ignored.

Dark-eyed guard and pale-eyed guard probably don’t even know about the creature that lies behind the door they guard. They probably have no idea how deep this base truly goes. The twisting tunnels and strange creatures hidden behind metal doors are unknown to them. If you’re being honest, even you don’t know what truly happens here. There are doors and areas of the base that you can’t access. Your level five clearance is nothing.

Some of these places Doctor Miller can’t even access. His clearance is way above yours, and he’s been working here for over two decades. But even he can't access every part of this base.

Doctor Miller told you once that this base is larger than anyone thinks. He mentioned the winding tunnels, secret experiments, strange objects, and creatures that people can only imagine. While he insisted that he can’t tell you everything, he did mention a massacre that occurred a few years back on one of the lower levels. That level has remained locked ever since. No one can get in there and nothing can get out.

After hearing the story, you wonder if something like that would happen on this floor. It’s possible. You only know one of the creatures that reside on this floor. He’s docile and friendly with you, but who knows what else lurks behind locked doors. That thought sends a shiver down your spine.

Arriving at the end of the hall, your thoughts come to a halt. The door, like the others, is metal and locked with a keycard and hand scanner. You think there should be more security. Not just to protect the people on base, but to protect what is inside.

Once the card is swiped and your hand in scanned, the door unlocks and slides open.

The room is large, filled with computers, lab equipment, and a handful of desks. The only source of light in the room comes from a couple of computers in rest mode and two overhead lights. At the far end of the room is a large glass wall.

You enter the room, lazily dropping the stack of papers and files onto your desk. The papers aren’t important. No one asked you to drop off any late files or anything. They were just a guise to get into the room without the guards asking too many questions or getting suspicious. Rumors are spreading and new people are showing up at the base, so it’s important to cover your tracks.

As you approach the glass wall, you can see dark shapes behind the wall and hear the sound of running water. A flip of a switch and the lights beyond the glass turn on, revealing the glass wall is a giant aquarium. Within is a jungle of giant green plants and winding vines. A single large tree sits in the center. There’s a small waterfall in the corner that feeds into a pond. The water is recycled, maintained at a specific temperature and acidity.

You knock, three times, on the glass. For a moment, nothing happens. The small jungle is still, the only sounds you can hear is the running water and thrum of machines behind you. Then, the plants to your right begin the shake and tremble, and a hulking shape emerges on all fours.

Your mouth goes dry and your heart speeds up at the sight of the lizard-like creature. He reminds you of a cross between a Komodo Dragon and Bearded Dragon. He has a long snout, but his cheeks are covered in numerous spines. There are many more spines of various length scattered along his upper back. The creature's skin is a dark red, while the spines are a beautiful shade of turquoise. His eyes are a darker shade of turquoise. His mouth hangs open, revealing sharp teeth and a long dark tongue. He’s so beautiful, you think.

“Zaxos,” you said with a smile.

The large lizard stands on its hind legs and approaches the glass. His tail swings behind his body lazily and his front arms hang at his side. When the creature speaks, his voice is deep and gravely. “Human. It’s a bit late to be here, isn’t it?”

“Y-yes. I just wanted to see you and explain why I wasn’t here earlier. Doctor Miller had me rewriting all of our files by hand today.”

Zaxos’ eyes soften and he settles down on his stomach. His head rests against his front clawed-feet while his tail wraps around his body. “He told me.”

You nod. “You ate?”

“Yes. Doctor Miller brought me something called tuna. It was quite good.”

“Good. Tomorrow, want me to bring you some mangos?”

Zaxos’ eyes grow wide and he nods. “Yes.”

“Alright. Would you like me to get anything for you before I leave?”

“Do you have to go now?”

“No, I told the guards I might be here late. I used Doctor Miller as an excuse.”

Zaxos snorts and sits up. “Can you come in here?”

You smile and nod. The door to enter Zaxos’ glass cage is sealed with a code that only the lead scientist is supposed to know. Doctor Miller gave it to you when he saw how close Zaxos and you were. You had to swear to never reveal you know the code, no matter what happens.

Once the code is punched in, you kick off your shoes and socks, cuff your pants and enter the large aquarium. The air inside is warm and humid, the ground beneath your feet is damp and warm. Zaxos has not moved from his position. He watches you, turquoise eyes narrowed and tail twitching.

When you reach him, he lifts his head from his front legs. When standing, Zaxos towers over you, but in his current position, his head reaches just below your breasts. He rubs his face against your stomach, inhaling and growling. You touch his face; fingers graze the scales and small spines that adorn his face.

“Can I hold you?” he asked.

“You have muddy claws.”

“So?”

“You’ll get mud on my lab coat.”

“So? It’s just mud.”

“Yeah, mud that the guards and others will see.”

Zaxos huffs and looks up at you. “Take off the coat.”

“If I take off my coat, you’ll want all my clothes off. And need I remind you what happened last time?”

Zaxos groans and hides his face in your shirt.

The memory of what happened is still fresh. Zaxos was curious about human bodies, specifically about what human clothes hide, and asked to see you naked. It started innocently, you pointing to your body parts and telling him what they were for. Zaxos listened and watched with a child-like curiosity, nodding at your explanations. However, that changed when you pointed between your legs.

You explained where your vagina and urethra were and the difference between the two. That got Zaxos’ attention and he started asking more questions about human sexuality and mating. You are a scientist, so you explained it to him in a very clinical way. It wasn’t until he stepped closer and nuzzled the dark curls between your legs, inhaling deeply, did you realize he was aroused.

His eyes were hazy, he was panting and drooling. His body shifted, and between his legs, you could see a partially swollen and leaking slit. The tip of what you assumed was his penis was poking out. Zaxos snapped out of his haze when you gasped and moved away, face on fire. He was shocked and embarrassed, apologized, then hid in the bushes.

Looking back, the situation is a bit amusing. But at the time, it freaked you out. You haven’t been with anyone in a very long time. It’s been several years since your last sexual encounter; not like you were telling everyone that. Cuddling only happens with your pillows. And holding hands doesn’t count if it’s with yourself. So, learning that this overgrown lizard can be sexually aroused by you, well it was a huge shock.

“I didn’t mean for that to happen or to upset you,” he grumbles.

“You didn’t upset me; I was just… surprised.”

Zaxos rumbles low in his throat and looks up at you. “You were scared. Could smell it on you.”

A heavy sigh leaves you. Not only were you scared, but you were also turned on. But you can’t tell Zaxos that. “I was a bit, yes.”

“Don’t want you to be scared of me. Never you.”

“I know. I’m sorry I acted that way. I have no reason to be afraid of you. You’re the sweetest lizard around.”

“Not a lizard.”

“Right, not a lizard. A Volkodan from a faraway planet that crashed here on Earth. My apologies.”

Zaxos sits on his back legs and nuzzles your face, his tongue runs along your cheek. You giggle at the rough feel and the heat of his breath. He rumbles, low in his chest; his claws twitch in a desire to hold you against his body.

Zaxos, the sweet alien lizard, has been stuck in this base for almost a decade. When he was brought into the base, snarling and fighting, Doctor Miller took over as the lead scientist. It took a while, but Miller managed to get on his good side.

You’ve only been working with Miller, and in turn Zaxos, for a year and a half. You still remember the first time you saw Zaxos. He was terrifying, so tall and broad, all sharp edges and even sharper teeth. But there was no denying his beauty. He took to you almost instantly, and you took to him. For the longest time, his eyes followed you every time you entered the lab. It took a few months before he was talking to you, and by the sixth month, you were entering his habitat.

As far as you know, Zaxos is the only extraterrestrial on base. You read old reports about other creatures that fell through portals. The descriptions were usually redacted or were purposely vague. But you imagined horned demons and monsters. Other reports tell of objects that reveal things that hide in the shadows. But there were no other reports of aliens.

“Human,” Zaxos said.

“Yes?”

“You always smell so good.” Zaxos’ nose rubs against your neck, he inhales and growls at your scent. His mouth parts, his breath is hot against your skin. A shiver runs down your spine when his tongue laps at the base of your throat.

“Zaxos,” you whimpered.

One of Zaxos’ clawed hands settles on your back; his claws grip the back of your lab coat. “Hmm. My soft human always smells so sweet. Know you’ll taste sweeter.”

A whimper escapes you. Zaxos growls at the noise and continues to lick your neck. Your legs shake and your heart pounds in your chest. His tongue, so rough and long, sends your body into a tizzy; there’s slick gathering in your panties and you're trembling in his grasp.

In a desperate attempt to stay upright, you cling to Zaxos’ broad shoulders. His second-hand settles on your waist, and he pulls you into his lap. His tongue glides down your neck and over your collar bones, his teeth graze your soft skin. The intimacy of the situation has you shaking and whimpering, eyes fluttering shut and heart pounding in your ears. His clawed hand slides up your back, while the hand on your hip tightens. A rumble comes from Zaxos and you whimper in response.

It’s been so long since someone’s held you. The last intimate encounter you had was not bad, but it wasn’t anything to write home about. And it happened several years ago. But Zaxos, he’s barely done anything to you and you’re already a puddle in his hands. His touch, his entire presence, does something to you that you can’t explain. No human, man or woman, has ever made you feel like this.

Zaxos, despite his appearance, is treating you gently. The licking and slight graze of his teeth are arousing in the gentlest of ways. His hands that can easily rip apart anything, are soothing as they hold you. When he rumbles and growls, you swear it’s like a thunderstorm in his chest. Who knew, that the sound of thunder can be soothing. And his massive body, hard and sharp, is comforting. He’s solid and safe.

The realization takes the breath from your lungs and your eyes tear up. He’s safe. You’re safe with him.

“Zaxos.”

He pulls away and studies you face. His eyes narrow when he sees a tear slide down your cheek. With a clawed finger, Zaxos gathers the tear. He looks worried, so scared, you almost sob on the spot.

“It’s ok. I’m just a little emotional right now,” you said quickly.

Zaxos does not look convinced. “Did I hurt you?”

“No, no you didn’t. I… it’s been a long time since someone’s touched me or done anything in that way, and it’s a bit overwhelming.”

“Does my touch… bother you?”

“No. I really enjoy it, maybe a bit too much.”

Zaxos rumbles and nods. “I can smell it. Your body is responsive to me, but I wanted to make sure that you are comfortable. I am pleased you enjoy my touch.”

“And your tongue.”

Zaxos laughs, low and deep. “And my tongue.”

You leave an hour later. It was a challenge getting off of his lap, his whines and grumbles broke your heart. Plus, he was so safe and solid, you didn’t want to leave him. But the clock was ticking and it was getting later. While staying the night wouldn’t raise any eyebrows, you have to get home. A shower and a proper night’s rest are needed.

Zaxos walks you to the door of his cage and watches with sad eyes as you put on your shoes and fix your pants. You take off your lab coat, frown at the dirt and slight rips, but lay it over your arm.

“Zaxos.”

“Human.”

“I’ll be back tomorrow evening, ok? You, be good.”

“I’m always good.”

“I know.”

You lean forward and press a kiss to Zaxos’ snout. His eyes go wide for a moment, but they flutter shut and a low rumble comes from his chest. His eyes are hazy when you pull away, and you know he’s going to pull you back in, but the door slides shut. The lights turn off, but through the darkness of the cage, you can see Zaxos’ figure.

As you leave the lab, you can feel his eyes on you. There’s a pang in your chest and your eyes grow wet. You hate that he has to live in that cage, you want to take him home, but you know that is impossible. There’s no way to get him out of this lab, and even if you did, what would you do with him? Have him hide in your house?

The safest place for Zaxos is the aquarium he’s currently sitting in. And that thought, that thought breaks your heart even more.

[libsterslobsters]

Ramble On

Summary: Late night phone calls are rarely good, especially when they come from someone known for texting. Or maybe, just this once, it's for the best

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x gem! enhanced! Reader

(Reader sees bits of the future, understands all languages, and processes information abnormally quickly)

Warnings: Strong language, tiny bit of angst, mostly fluff

Author's note: Reader is unnamed, but when I'm writing this character, I call her Violet.

*************************************************

 As she rolls over, rearranging the covers around her for what must be the fiftieth time in an hour, she catches sight of the bedside clock. 2 a.m. She really needs to get to sleep. She has an interview in the morning, after all. The only problem: she can’t, too worried about what the outcome will be to get any rest.

 There’s so much riding on this one meeting. If she gets the job, teaching English as a second language at an actual college in Bucharest as opposed to in her apartment, her whole life will change. It will no longer be a constant struggle to stay afloat, often leading to the choice of whether she’s going to pay her heating or electric bill this month, eat or have a place to live.

 Applying for any job is a risk, because what if they look her up and a notification pops up on SHIELD’s radar? She’s forged her papers well, payed the right person to invent a background for her, but while it may hold up under the Romanians’ scrutiny, will it be enough to convince anyone lurking in the shadows that she’s a perfectly normal woman with nothing to hide? Or will there be a knock on her door in the middle of the night, followed by her being captured, herded onto a plane and then locked in a cell or worse?

 Rolling over once again, she tries to convince herself that enough time has passed, she looks different enough from the scared eighteen year old that flagged the American government’s interest when she fool-hardily took a job as an intern translator and performed a little too well.

 It’s not long before she’s tossing and turning once more, and this time her phone’s screen lights up. 2:30. Only three and a half more hours before she’s got to get up and prepare for the day ahead. She wishes she had some tea left, but she ran out three days ago. For a few minutes, she plays on her phone, rereading old messages between Barnes and herself, but eventually she has to stop. Thinking about him definitely isn’t helping her sleep, especially since she knows, no matter how much she wishes it were otherwise, he’ll never care for her the way she cares for him.

 Chiding herself for allowing the foolish longing for something different, for the man who’s only ever been kind to her, treated her like a close friend, to want her, she tosses her phone to the side and closes her eyes. She’s completely unaware that, inadvertently, she’s hit the little icon of a telephone and on the other side of the city, a ringing noise is filling the air.

__________________________________________________________________________________ 

 He’s not asleep when his phone rings. Not even so much as dozing. Still, it takes a few moments for Bucky to put together that the whirring noise is coming from his phone, and he should probably check to see who it is. As her name flashes on the screen, all weariness disappears, replaced at first by excitement, and then when he answers, receiving no reply, worry. It’s not like her to call this late, or really, to call at all without texting first to make sure he’s free (even though he’s told her multiple times to call whenever she likes, he’ll always answer). His first instinct is to rush over to her apartment and make sure she’s alright, but ultimately, a cooler head prevails. He should try to call her back first. Maybe they have a bad connection and she couldn’t hear him.

 That’s what he does, and after the third ring, she picks up.

 “Bucky?” It’s said in a voice that’s rough with disuse. “What’s going on? Are you alright?” That’s supposed to be his line.

 “I’m fine. What about you?” He hears her yawn over the line.

 “Dealing with some insomnia, but nothing huge.” Funny. She sounds exhausted.

 “Is that why you called? You’re having trouble sleeping?”

 “What?” He can imagine her brow furrowing in keeping with the confusion in her voice. “I didn’t call.”

 “You did. Didn’t say anything, though.”

 There’s a pause, and then-

 “Crap. I’m sorry, Buck. I must’ve rolled over on my phone and accidentally called you.” Oh. Now it makes sense.

 “It’s alright.”

 He’s about to tell her that his night’s so much better for hearing her voice, but stops short at the last second. It’s been going on for a few months, these casual dates at one or the other of their apartments, occasionally a cheap restaurant in the city, or just out for a walk. Still, he hasn’t so much as kissed her yet, too worried that he’ll push too far and frighten her, or worse, make her feel like she has to do something she doesn’t truly want. She hasn’t made a move to speed things up either, so he’s waiting, taking things slow. It doesn’t bother him; he’s got all the time in the world on his hands, and frankly, he’s enjoying just getting to know all the little things about her.  Still, he doesn’t want to come on too strong, so he simply says,

 “Why don’t you tell me what’s bothering you?”

 “Nothing.” She chuckles, but he can tell it’s faked for his benefit. “I’ll let you go now.”

 “No, you won’t. You’re going to tell me what’s keeping you up so that maybe you can get some rest before the sun comes up.” He internally winces as his words. It sounds like he’s ordering her around.

 “Alright.” She sighs. “I have that interview tomorrow-” He nods, even though she can’t see him. “-and I think I’m just too in my head about it, you know? I keep going over all the ways it could go south, and the more I try to push that aside, the more I think about it.” 

 He chooses his words carefully, knowing that it’s not just the possibility that she won’t get the job that’s worrying her.

 “They don’t check things as closely here as they do back home. And even if they did decide to do some sort of background check, so far as all your paperwork is concerned, you’re just another college grad looking to put your teaching degree to use.”

 He may have done a little reconnaissance, gotten into certain government buildings not open to the public and checked out exactly what they know about her just to make sure her forgeries would stand up, but she doesn’t need to know that. It would just worry her that he’s taking unnecessary risks over something she doesn’t consider a necessity.

 “I know. It’s just a niggling feeling. Not a vision or anything. Just paranoia.” 

 Speaking of…

 “Have you had any visions lately?” Sometimes they’re funny. Sometimes useful. Sometimes, downright bizarre.

 “Yes. I’m having one right now of you sitting up in bed, talking on the phone when you should definitely be sleeping because you’re too polite to tell me I woke you up.”

 “Must be something that hasn’t happened yet, because I’m actually lying down, and I was wide awake when you called.” He hopes that’ll be enough to assuage her guilt.

 “Hm… I’m calling bullshit on that, Barnes. Have you looked at the time? It’s nearly three a.m.”

 “It is, but that doesn’t change the fact that I was up.” She’s not going to believe him unless he explains. “I don’t sleep much.” 

 “Part of the super soldier thing?”

 “I don’t think so. More like I’m afraid that if I close my eyes, they’ll get the drop on me and put me back on ice.” He definitely didn’t mean to say that last part, but now that it’s out there, he can’t take it back.

 “Bucky, you need to sleep. That’s not healthy.” The corners of his lips turn up. All the way across the city, awake at three a.m., and she’s scolding him for not getting his beauty rest.

 “Neither is worrying about a job interview that you’ve got in the bag since you’re a great teacher.”

 They’d be stupid not to hire her. She literally speaks every language on the planet, and even though they won’t know that part, she’s still completely qualified. Plus, she’ll give this job her all, work harder than anyone else they could possibly hire, because she actually cares about the people she’s teaching. Them; not just their lives so far as it pertains to her classroom.

 “How would you know that? You’ve never been one of my students.” Maybe not, but she’s taught him so much, like how to be alive again instead of just surviving. But, he should probably keep that to himself.

 “Well, I already speak English.”

 “Good point. Spanish, then?”

 “Afraid I speak that one too.”

 “French? Mandarin?”

 “Yes and yes.”

 “What about gibberish? Surely you’re not fluent in gibberish.” 

 He chuckles.

 “You’ve got me there. I don’t speak it.”

 “That’s too bad, because I’m only conversational.” Another yawn sounds from her side of the phone. “Alright, this time I really am letting you go.” Good. Hopefully, she’s finally able to get some rest now that she’s shifted some of the weight of her worries to him. “Goodnight, Bucky. Thanks for talking me down.”

 “Goodnight, Doll. You’re gonna knock ‘em dead.”

 As the call ends, his phone flashing the length of their conversation, Bucky finds that maybe, just maybe, he’ll get some sleep tonight after all.

[colbybrocksmolder]

Tumblr – Colby Brock x Reader

Tumblr is…a mixed bag. You’d made some of your closest internet friends on this poorly run website, but you’d also received more than your share of crazy fangirl hate. What’s crazy though, is how easy it is to make friends in the Sam and Colby fandom on Tumblr. 99% of everyone you’ve met is super nice and the group kind of shuts down the haters pretty quickly.

This last round of drama kind of wore everyone down. It all started with a hate anon that your friend DaddyDobrock received. “If Sam and Colby saw half of what you guys wrote on here they wouldn’t want you as fans 🙄.” She handled it well. She laughed and told the anon to lighten up and fuck off. You guys were pretty used to petty hate anons and rarely answer them, but boy was this asshole persistent.

Absolute-randomness-forever replied to a similar message with “If you don’t like what we post, don’t follow us?” Again, not really feeding into any drama.

Sp00kybrock got one trying to get her opinion on the whole thing. “Don’t you think most of the Sam and Colby tumblr fandom is toxic? Like, I bet Colby would cringe so hard if he went on this site. 🙄” She defended her friends, laughing it off. “My friends and I aren’t toxic. We post memes and joke around, but we support the boys 100%.”

Jakeywebber commented on a few of the new posts. “Does this person even watch the boys? They obviously don’t know that their sense of humor is exactly like ours.”

The anons continued to come in, a few other people getting them but not replying. They always ended with 🙄. The problem with one toxic anon is that they attract others that want to feed into the drama, and soon the hate is taken too far.

Someone got an anon telling them to kill themselves. Eye rolling emoji included. The blog posted the anon with no comment other than “deleting now” and went offline. To say that the rest of you were up in arms is an understatement. Lightenupbrock, that-one-brock-boy, badassbrock, the-sun-is-dark, colbyjacksmack, rewindfridaynight, xplr-lurker, brockboytrashz…you all jumped in and defended your friend. You sent them messages making sure they were okay, trying to convince them not to delete.

*Twitter notification* Colby Brock Tweeted : “FYI we see more than you think we see. Don’t pretend to be our fan and then treat other fans like shit. Especially anonymously. 🙄”

Daddydobrock posted “Anyone else see this?” with a screenshot of the tweet.

A few of the others reblogged it, adding comments. By the end of the thread, your group of friends was convinced that Colby either had a tumblr or occasionally lurked on it.

*tumblr messages*

Xplr-lurker : Hey, have you heard from the girl that got the kys anon?

You and Xplr-lurker had been tumblr friends for about 6 months. They messaged you after they saw how you interacted with the other blogs. You were always helpful, kind, encouraging…You had a reputation for being a sweetheart and Xplr-lurker had messaged you thanking you for it. You two became friends pretty quickly, asking how each other’s days went and such. Neither of you ever really posted your personal info on your blogs, but you knew a bit about each other. You both lived in Cali, you were about the same age, and you loved sending each other super emo tumblr posts when you were bored. Usually hella late at night. He knew you were a girl and you knew he was a guy. Other personal details kind of trickled through in your everyday interactions.

Y/n : Yeah. She doesn’t want to be online for a while, but she isn’t going to delete her blog. I gave her my phone number just in case she needed to talk.

Xplr-lurker : I figured you would 😊 I’m glad she’s okay.

Y/n : Me too.

Y/n : Hey, did you see Colby’s tweet? I think he saw all of this go down. I mean, maybe I’m just assuming too much, but he ended a tweet about anon hate with that stupid eye roll emoji just like the anon does.

Xplr-lurker : I mean, he said he checks his dms all the time. Maybe someone sent it to him?

Y/n : Maybe.

Y/n : Honestly, I’m just as mad for him and Sam as I am for the girl. How shitty is it that they have to watch the people who call themselves fans treat other fans like garbage? And they can’t do a thing about it.

Xplr-lurker : That sounds like it would suck.

Y/n : Right?

You had written a whole big post about how hypocritical it was for this toxic anon to accuse everyone else of being bad for the fandom when they were so willing to go out of their way to harm other fans. You reminded them about the videos Sam and Colby used to post about being confident and helping others. Their entire YouTube career started with them making videos wanting to help people. Just like every other post, you signed it with two black heart emojis. 🖤🖤

You had continued talking to xplr-lurker as you wrote the post. Venting a little bit about how frustrated you were.

*Twitter notification* Colby Brock Tweeted : “Don’t worry, we know there are amazing fans out there, too. 🖤🖤”

Y/n : Dude. I think I’m paranoid, now.

Xplr-lurker : What do you mean?

Y/n : Nothing. I’m exhausted. I just need sleep, lol. You do too, nerd. You said you needed to be up by 9 and it’s already 4am.

Xplr-lurker : Holy shit, my friend is going to kill me if I’m falling asleep tomorrow, haha.

Y/n : Haha, good luck! I’ll talk to you later.

Xplr-lurker : Thanks. Sweet dreams.

See, it’s pretty common for social media influencers to have secret accounts. It gives them a way to like posts and follow fans without starting drama. After collabing with CrankThatFrank, Colby was convinced to make a tumblr. He picked Xplr-lurker so that it made sense for him to interact with his own fans. He mostly just reblogged cool edits and funny traphouse memes. He’d comment on funny posts and throw his two cents in on theories and gossip. For the most part, it was kind of fun. People on tumblr were brutally honest but fucking hilarious. He never planned on talking about tumblr or letting anyone he interacted with on tumblr know that he was behind the username…but then he found your blog. He’d contemplated telling you for a few weeks now. The two of you talked almost every night and he felt bad. He felt like he was lying to you.

He’d first messaged you just to say a quick thanks for being so positive in the fandom, but the more he talked to you the more he kept wanting to talk to you.

The 🙄 anon stopped sending people messages after Colby’s tweet. Your friends on tumblr were able to go back to posting ridiculous screenshots and cool photo edits over the next week or so. You’d reblogged a gif of Colby about to lose his shorts on a waterslide with the caption “I feel like Elton has been trying to get Colby naked in vlogs since the start of TFIL”.

Xplr-lurker : *sent waterslide post*

Xplr-lurker : This is a fat fact. Lol.

Y/n : Right? Hahahahaha

Xplr-lurker : I think he does it for views.

Y/n : Probably. It’s the same reason Colby gets shirtless in his own videos. He knows people will click the thumbnail, haha.

Colby sat on his balcony laughing. You were absolutely right.

Xplr-lurker : Is that why you clicked?

Y/n : Haha, nah. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a beautiful human being. You’d have to be blind not to see that. But I found Colby through TFIL.  

Xplr-lurker : What made you keep watching him then?

Colby felt bad for baiting you out, but his curiosity got the better of him. As far as you knew, he was just another fan. This is when he’d get your most honest answer.

Y/n : A lot. First, he’s a huge goofball. Watching him and his friends do dumb shit to make each other laugh is the best.

Y/n : And everything him and Sam have done together? Those two dudes are fearless. They just remind me that I’m the only one holding myself back, you know? One day I’ll actually get out of my own way and make something of myself.

Y/n : He also seems super genuine. He never seems afraid to speak his mind or call something like it is. It actually bums me out watching some of his “friends”, If you know what I mean. I know that not everything they put out there is 100% accurate to how they actually are in real life, but I hate that slimy feeling I get knowing that a lot of them use Sam and Colby and don’t actually give a shit.

Y/n : I know I sound like a massive fangirl at this point, haha. I think I just needed to get that off my chest.

Colby sat there trying to figure out how to respond. He had a huge grin on his face seeing you spill your guts like you did.

Xplr-lurker : Haha, don’t worry about it. You just sound like you care. That’s not a bad thing.

Over the next few weeks, you guys continued to talk like normal, but it got a little more personal. He wanted to be able to call you a friend, but he was still afraid to tell you who he actually was. You two talked more about your passions and the things you struggle with. You’d always sent each other music to check out, but he’d confessed that he’d been dabbling in trying to write lyrics. He needed to find a way to talk to you as COLBY and not xplr-lurker.

*Twitter notification* Colby Brock Tweeted : “You feel so close but in reality I’m sitting here on my balcony alone.”

One of your tumblr friends had screenshot the tweet, adding the caption “This is how it feels to have better friends on the internet than in real life.”

You reblogged it and tagged xplr-lurker. You added “I wouldn’t trade our late-night talks for the world.”

Xplr-lurker : *sent tagged post*

Xplr-lurker : Yeah?

Y/n : Duh. You know that.

Xplr-lurker : Same.

Colby sat there, his fingers hovering over the keyboard on his phone.

*Twitter notification* Colby Brock Tweeted : “1 like = 1 ‘don’t be a pussy’ whispered in my ear.”

Xplr-lurker : Not to sound like a creepy internet person, but have you ever met any of your internet friends in real life?

Y/n : Haha, I don’t think you’re creepy. And yes! I’ve met a few of them. Why?

Xplr-lurker : I know we live in the same city and I’ve always wondered if you’d want to get coffee or something.

Y/n : That would mean that you’d get to see how awkward and clumsy I am in real life. I don’t know if I’m willing to put you through that, hahaha.

Colby laughed. That response was better than the “fuck off, creeper” he expected.

Xplr-lurker : Oh, shut up. You’d be the one dealing with me being awkward.

Y/n : Suuuuuuure. You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into.

Y/n : I’m actually walking home from my favorite coffee shop right now, haha. It’s called 101. They’re open until 3 am and they have the best food.

Xplr-lurker : WHY ARE YOU WALKING ALONE SO LATE AT NIGHT?!

It was well past 2am and the thought of you walking the streets of LA by yourself kind of had Colby on edge.

Y/n : I live like 5 minutes away. Don’t worry.

Colby pulled up 101 Coffee Shop on his phone. It was less than a 10 minute drive from his apartment. *We actually live pretty close* he thought, switching back to the tumblr app.

Xplr-lurker : Tell me when you make it home safe. LA is scary at night.

Xplr-lurker : Also, that coffee shop is not far from me. If you ever want to meet up there, I’m down.

Y/n : I just walked in my front door. Stop worrying, mom.

Y/n : And I’ll be headed back there tomorrow around midnight. My roommate’s boyfriend is obnoxious and he comes over every night around then. I usually hang out at the coffee shop and work on stuff on my laptop for a few hours.

Xplr-lurker : I’m glad you’re safe. I’ll definitely try to make it there tomorrow.

Y/n : I’ll be the one with the messy bun, laptop, and baggy Y&R hoodie, lol.

Xplr-lurker : If I don’t chicken out, I’ll wear an XPLR hoodie.

Y/n : Well I need to go to sleep. If I don’t see you tomorrow, I’m sure I’ll still talk to you on here.

Xplr-lurker : For sure! Have a good night!

Y/n : You too. 🖤🖤

“Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.” Colby said, sighing. This was it. He was either going to walk into that coffee shop and blow his cover or he was going to chicken out like a little bitch.

The whole next day he had a hard time paying attention to anything or anyone. He was too busy trying to figure out the best way to tell you who he was.

“Colby!” Sam laughed, waving his hand in front of his friend’s face.

“What? Sorry.” Colby said, shaking his head and turning towards Sam.

“You okay?” Sam asked. Colby just stared at him for a minute. “I’m going to take that as a no?”

“I’m not, not okay.” Colby answered, sounding cryptic.

“Okaaaayyy.” Sam said slowly. “Care to explain?”

“I’m just nervous to meet up with someone later.” Colby tried to sound casual. “It’s nothing big. I’m just anxious, I guess.”

“Who?” Sam asked.

“A girl I met online.” Colby said, waiting for Sam to tease him.

Sam furrowed his brows. “Like on a dating app?”

“No.” Colby shook his head. “She’s a fan.”

Sam made a confused face. “Not to make it sound like I think you’re stupid, but are you being catfished again?” He laughed.

Colby couldn’t help but crack a smile, hiding his face behind his hands. “No, actually. I don’t even know what this girl looks like.”

“What?!” Sam asked, confused.

“That’s not the weirdest part.” Colby said, peeking through his fingers at his best friend. “She doesn’t know I’m me.”

“Is this for a video or something?” Sam asked, not understanding at all what was going on.

“Nope. I made an account to interact with fans and we just kind of clicked.” Colby tried explaining. “We’ve been friends for like 6 months, but we only ever talk through our usernames. The more I say this out loud the crazier it sounds.” Colby laughed.

“Sooooo, you’ve never seen a picture of her?” Sam asked.

“Nope. Not for sure. I THINK I found her personal blog, but I could be wrong.” Colby answered. “I only know her name because it’s in her profile, but she’s never asked me mine.”

“Is she going to be mad?” Sam asked, trying to wrap his head around the whole thing.

“That’s kind of why I’m so nervous.” Colby said, biting his lip. “She told me where she’s going to be tomorrow night and I don’t know if I should just show up or if I should rip the band-aid off and tell her who I am in our dms before we’re supposed to meet up.”

Sam had a blank stare on his face. “I honestly have no idea how to help you.”

“Don’t feel bad. I don’t know how to help myself.” Colby laughed.

“Tell me how it goes?” Sam asked.

“Of course.” Colby nodded, zoning out again.

At around 11:30pm you’d walked to the coffee shop. You ordered a drink and your late dinner and sat down in the corner booth. You worked on some things you were currently writing and gone through and caught up with your emails. At about 1am, you’d convinced yourself your tumblr friend had chickened out.

Right around 12:30am, Colby was stood in front of the coffee shop he was supposed to meet you at. There were only a few people currently in the shop, so it was pretty easy to figure out which one was you. He’d taken a deep breath and walked through the door, darting to the counter when he started to panic. With his back to you, he ordered a coffee. *I don’t even like coffee* he thought to himself. He kept peeking at you from the pick-up counter while he waited for his order. You had headphones in your ears, mouthing the lyrics to whatever song you were listening to. When the barista called out his name, he grabbed his coffee and left the shop.

Xplr-lurker : I’m stuck.

Xplr-lurker : You’re normally the person I go to for advice, but I feel like it’s unfair to put this one on you.

Xplr-lurker : You’re beautiful, btw.

You looked up from your computer, searching for your friend.

Y/n : Thank you? Are you here?

Xplr-lurker : I was. I chickened out. I kind of panicked.

Y/n : Aww, I promise you have no reason to panic. So why are you stuck? I’m always here to listen and give advice when I think I can help. You know that.

Colby sighed, sitting in his car.

Xplr-lurker : I guess it’s better just to come out with it.

Xplr-lurker : My name is Colby.

You waited a few seconds for further explanation.

Y/n : Okay? I don’t get it.

Xplr-lurker : Like, I am Colby Brock. I made this account to interact with fans.

Y/n : Please tell me you’re just fucking with me as a friend and not a delusional fanboy that’s trying to actually convince me he’s someone he’s not.

*Great* you thought to yourself. Not only did you have to walk home at night by yourself in LA, now you had to keep an eye out for a crazy person who wanted you to believe they were Colby. You thought this person was your friend and now you were afraid to leave the coffee shop.

Xplr-lurker : Neither? I know I fucked up by not telling you sooner.

Y/n : Well, since whoever is on the other end of this message knows I’m here alone, I’m going to call my roommate to pick me up. You know, you were really cool. You were my favorite person to talk to. This really sucks. You didn’t have to be anyone but yourself.  

When Colby tried to reply to your message, the chat said that he had been blocked. “Oh, fuck.” He said, jumping back out of his car. When he got to the door of the coffee shop, he could see that you were packing up your stuff.

“Y/n!” he called from the door, walking towards your booth.

Your eyes flew towards the boy walking in your direction, your hands frozen holding your laptop.

Colby slowly slid into the other side of the booth you were sitting in, putting his phone down with the tumblr app open. “I’m so sorry.”

“What the fuck?” you whispered, still not moving.

“You have every right to be mad at me and I swear I never meant to freak you out. I didn’t really think it through when I told you who I was. Is your roommate coming?” He asked, talking so fast you could barely process what he was saying.

You sat your laptop down and grabbed his phone. “My roommate wouldn’t come pick me up even if I did call her.” You said, looking at the tumblr app on Colby’s phone. You were the only person he had messaged.

“You were going to walk?” Colby asked, grabbing his phone when you handed it back to him.

“I was going to order an Uber.” You laughed. “This is crazy. You’re crazy.”

“Are you mad?” Colby’s face was apprehensive, waiting for you to tell him to fuck off.

“A little.” You nodded, laughing. “You asked me questions about yourself! I fangirled to you about you!” You remembered, covering your now blushing cheeks with your hands, hiding your face.

He laughed. “I feel the need to say this in person…You’re beautiful.” He watched as you peeked over your fingers. “And I’m the one that should be embarrassed about that, not you.”

“Why did you ask me to meet if you didn’t want me to know who you were?” You asked, remembering that this whole thing was his idea.

He laughed, reaching to grab one of your hands. “I’ve been trying to nut up and tell you who I am for over a month.”

“Why me? You didn’t even know what I looked like?” You were still trying to take in the fact that Colby Brock was sitting here in your favorite coffee shop holding your hand.

“I didn’t really care what you looked like. You’ve been a great friend to me since we first started talking and I was just some random person you met online…That has nothing to do with how someone looks.” He explained, blushing before continuing. “The fact that you’re also adorable is just an added bonus.”

You laughed, pulling your hand out of his so you could re-do your messy bun that was currently falling. “This is crazy. I want to re-read everything I’ve ever sent to you to make sure I didn’t make a complete fool out of myself.”

“Y/n.” Colby laughed. “You didn’t. I promise. There’s not a single thing you’ve told me that I don’t like.”

You stared at him for a moment, trying to figure out what the hell you were supposed to do now. “I have one question.” You said, leaning your elbows on the table.

“Ask away.” He answered, leaning forward the same way you were.

“What’s the REAL reason Elton always tries to get you naked in his vlogs?” You smirked, hearing Colby bust a gut laughing.

“Honestly, I’ve questioned it myself. The only answer that keeps me sane is clickbait.” He shook his head. “So, we’re good?” he asked.

“I mean, I don’t know WHAT we are, but I hope it isn’t bad.” You laughed.

“Well, we’ve been friends for over 6 months. I’d like to still claim that even though you know now that I’ve been a dumbass this entire time.” He smiled.

“I think I can deal with that.” You smiled back at him.

“Should I push my luck and ask you if I can buy you another coffee?” He asked, a shy look on his face. “I think coffee is disgusting, but I hear coffee shops make for great first dates.”

“You went from being afraid to show your face to asking me on a date.” You laughed.

“Well?” Colby said, waiting for your answer.

You nodded, your cheeks turning pink. “I’d love another coffee.”

I can remove any of the tumblrs I’ve used if you’re uncomfortable being mentioned. @daddydobrock @absolute-randomness-forever @sp00kybrock @jakeywebber @lightenupbrock @that-one-brock-boy @badassbrock @the-sun-is-dark @colbyjacksmack @rewindfridaynight @brockboytrashz 

[fluffyunicornofdanger]

Living a Little Part 6

A/N: I have been thinking about finishing this series forever but just never got around to it. Living a Little is one of my favorite works and I’m so glad you guys like it, I’ll probably have the next part out soon. Between now and then, let’s hope I find the motivation to do my Biology project. Anyway, let me know if you guys like it and yeah. Also, I forgot how much I love writing for Queen, so I might be posting a bunch of Queen content in the near future.

*~~*~~*

Masterlist

John Deacon x Reader

Part 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5

Summary: Y/n get dragged out of her comfort zone by her roommate, even though she knows Y/n never goes out, due to her studies, to a rock concert. Of all places. But maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea after all, when she meets, a very interesting, certain bassist. And he just so happens to find her interesting too.

Word Count: 2 k

Warnings: Language, implied domestic violence, editing, idk

A couple of months had gone by and little had changed. 

Charles made appearances every now and then, but they no longer kept Y/n up at night. Or at least, she tried to make it seem like they didn’t.  

Once she’d seen him at the market, while she was picking out apples. Another time, he was at the car wash the same time she was. Every time he crossed her vision she tried to pretend that he wasn’t there. That he was merely another stranger among a sea of strangers. It worked as long as no one listened to her heart rate increase. If someone listened closely, she was sure they would be able to hear her heartbeat against her ribcage. 

Charles didn’t go away and neither did John. 

Though she hadn’t done a good job of communicating with him after their second date, John did a fabulous job of keeping in touch with her. It was evident to everyone that he was in love with her and couldn’t stay away. Y/n felt the same, but at that moment in time, John was more of a distraction for her than anything. 

She never went to see him because she loved him or was dying to see him. She never made plans with him because she missed him or wanted to spend time with him. Every second that she spent by his side was one second that she wasn’t thinking about the nightmare that lurked in the shadows. 

Y/n loved John. She really did, but she needed more than love to survive.

Charles hadn’t spoken a word to her, yet his voice filled her mind with vicious thoughts. The mental abuse he had inflicted upon her years ago came creeping back. Yet he wasn’t the one inflicting it this time around. Y/e was beating herself up just like Charles had once done. 

At night, she would cry for hours about things she couldn’t control, no heard her cries so they lasted for hours. Alice never noticed the bags under her roommate’s eyes or the amount of liquor that Y/n drowned to keep her demons at bay. No one seemed to notice her spilling into a pit of misery.

“David Bowie’s performing tomorrow night at this new venue, you see if Johna and the boys wanna come see it with us,” Alice asked while reading the paper.  

Y/n was hunched over a medical textbook. She had a major test in a week and due to everything going on she’d been less than stellar at paying attention in class. 

“Y/n.”

Her eyes tarted up from the page, “What?”

“Did you not hear me?”

She shook her head, going back to her reading.”

Alice scoffed. “I swear, you have been up in the clouds lately. I’d say it’s because of John but you never seem to happy to see him.”

“I don’t know what you mean-” Y/n closed the book and looked at her roommate. “-how could I not be happy to see him?”

She shrugged, “I don’t know, Y/n. You just seem off, that’s all I’m saying.” Y/n rolled her eyes, “I’m gonna go for a walk.”

Without another word, she grabbed her coat and exited the flat. The brisk London air swept her hair up and whipped it around as she stepped onto the sidewalk. She just turned the corner when someone fell in step beside her.

“It’s a lovely day, isn’t it?” Charles stated.

Through gritted teeth, Y/n asked, “What are you doing here, Charles?”

“Can’t I go out for a stroll?”

She rolled her eyes.

“It’s just luck that I ran into you.”

Yeah, just his luck. It seemed that Y/n had run clean out of luck a long time ago. “You really shouldn’t be here, you know that. I made it clear a long time ago that I wanted nothing to do with you. So, why must you force your way back into my life?” she asked.

He shook his head in amusement. “I haven’t forced my way into your life, I’ve barely entered it. You wouldn’t like what I’d do if I forced my way in.”

Y/n turned to confront him to see that he was no longer at her side. Instead, he had crossed the street, almost out of her view.

What a bastard!

Why? Why couldn’t life just work in her favor for once? Things always went well for her only for a tidal wave to hit and destroy everything! All she wanted was happiness. Just an ounce… that’s all she was asking for. 

No destination in sight, Y/n kept walking. The further she walked, the further away Charles was. At least, she hoped. Logic didn’t matter to her as long as she felt safe in some sense. 

Distance had once made her feel safe. With Charles an ocean away, Y/n felt like she had the whole world in her hands. No task was too big for her with the power that she had felt. That was the power that told her she had what it took to become a doctor.  

She believed that.

And then Charles came back and she wasn’t sure what to believe.

Perhaps up was down and down and was up. The ocean was green and the sky was purple. She just didn’t know anymore. 

Most importantly, she didn’t know who she was anymore.

Sure, she had never been the most outgoing, but she knew what made her happy. Her love her medicine made studying fun and easy and kept her on track for graduating. Music had always brought her to life, allowing her to get lost in the grove. But known of that seemed to bring her any joy.

Y/n stopped in front of a bar, it was 5 o’clock at night and she saw no reason to turn around and walk home. She actually wasn’t sure which way was home. A mind occupied by troubles, Y/n had walked aimlessly with blinders. Who knew what part of the city she was in.

The bar was almost empty when she entered, only a few people scattered throughout. Y/n walked up to the bar and took a seat, she rested her hand against her chin. The bartender walked over a few seconds later and stared down at her, “Rough day, darling?”

Y/n nodded. It seemed more like a rough life, though.

“I got just the thing for you, it wouldn’t fix anything, but it should take your mind off it for a bit,” the bartender told her before she disappeared.

*~~*~~*

A few hours had passed, and Y/n was surprised that the bartender kept serving her and that she hadn’t fallen out of her chair yet. It was probably 11 and the place was hopping with people. There was barely room to move around, let alone breath and the alcohol was racing through Y/n’s blood like a freight train. Her heart was pound as her head spun round and round. Trying to stand, she fumbled around the room before a pair of strong arms grabbed her. 

“I got ya’. Let’s get you out of here.”

Y/n nodded, letting the person guide her out of the building. 

In the open street, the two stopped next to a street lamp. Y/n leaned against it, trying to get her bearings. Maybe she had one too many drinks. 

“Thanks,” she slurred.

“No problem, Y/n.”

Looking up, Y/n caught sight of her savor, the street lamp casting light over his features. It was the last person she wanted to see. “Charlie.”

“What happened to Charles?” he asked before flashing her a smile. “You know you’re a lightweight, so why’d you down so much?”

Y/n growled, shoving herself off the lamp post. How did he always find her? “What are you doing here, Charlie? Don’t you have somewhere else to be?”

He chuckled, giving her that same old grin, the one that he always gave her before bringing her in for a kiss. She used to miss that smile, used to miss him a lot, but times changed. “I just want to make sure you’re safe. Trying to be nice here, Y/n, don’t go turning me into a bad guy for that.”

She scoffed, walking in the direction she believed home was. “You’re never trying to be nice. You only ever do anything for personal gain.” Y/n turned to him, “What do you think you’ll gain this time around?”

“Who said I plan to gain anything? I’m just trying to be friendly.”

Bullshit.  

Charles walked beside her as Y/n navigated the sidewalk, trying not to trip over thin air. 

“Why’d you even come back? Did the American refuse to put up with your bullshit?”

Charles rolled his eyes, “I got promoted and my company offered me a position here. You can’t pass up money like that, Y/n. It’s insane.”

“You can and you could have passed up coming back into my life.”

*~~*~~*

Alice got up when she heard a knock from the door. It was late and she just wanted to sleep. Y/n had disappeared hours ago and Alice had a big test the next morning, a little sleep, a little less stress, was all she was asking for. God, who knew having a roommate could be so stressful. Trudging to the door, she opened it, her eyes adjusting to the hallway lights.

In front of her stood John, Brian, Freddie, and Roger. She sighed, knowing exactly what they wanted. 

“She’s not here.”

John gave her a puzzled look. Y/n was normally always home. “Where is she at?”

Alice shrugged, “Beats me. Probably at a bar or having dinner somewhere. I don’t know.”

Turning to his friends, the shrugged and suggested that they go. It would be no use waiting for her. John couldn’t help but agree, he should have called ahead anyway. Y/n was always busy with either work or school, and she seemed stressed out over something. Maybe she just needed some time to herself. “Alright, will you tell her that I stopped by?” the man asked.

The blonde nodded, “Of course.”

The musician turned and followed his friends out of the building, disappointment in his eyes. Though he knew that Y/n was probably busy with something, it seemed off. Y/n had seemed off for a while and everyone tried to tell him it was one thing or another. How could he believe that when there was always a hint of fear in her eyes? School and work weren’t the only things bothering her, but any time he asked what was, she brushed it off. 

“She’s probably out with her family,” Brian told him, giving him some hope. “Or probably had to pull an extra shift at work.”

He nodded, that had to be it. 

The group stepped out onto the street as Roger pulled out a cigarette. “This was a bust,” he said as he lite it.

“Oh, don’t say that, Rog. We can still go out a party,” Freddie stated as they walked to the car. “It would just be more fun for John if Y/n was there, that’s all.”

The blonde rolled his eyes, blowing out smoke. “Yeah, whatever.”

They all climbed into the small car as Roger turned the engine. The car roared to life as Roger caught sight of a couple walking down the street. Squinting his eyes, Roger made out what looked like Y/n and another man. It was probably her brother, but he thought she only had a sister. 

John was already feeling down, so Roger thought it best not to say anything, that was until the man Y/n was with wrapped his arms around her and brought her in for a kiss. Definitely wasn’t her brother.

“Um, guys, we have a problem,” Roger stuttered. 

Brian waved him away, “No we don’t, just drive, Roger.”

“Um, no, we do-” He pointed out the window at Y/n and the mysterious man. “- I think that is a problem.”

The three other men followed Roger’s gaze, landing on Y/n.  

John couldn’t believe what he was seeing, Y/n was the last person he thought would be unfaithful. The last person he thought would break his heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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[sserpente]

A/N: Request from anon. I got these a while back and just had to write them at some point. James getting trapped in a cave with RC? Um, yes please. Here’s what I came up with! Enjoy, my lovelies! ;-)

Words: 2524 Warnings: smut

Hatred was a strong word. You hated hypocrisy and ignorance, intolerance too. But you probably hated nothing and no one more than James Conrad. You didn’t quite know what it was about him that you despised so much. Was it how honourable, righteous and brave he was, the fact he was just a little too perfect? Honestly—a former soldier, a handsome British decommissioned Captain… every woman would be envied if she shared a bed with him at night. But not you! Oh no… not you. You hated this man with a passion, if anything because you knew a man like him—so hunky and decent—would never date someone like you.

You had a past. A criminal past… multiple thefts had turned into assaults, illegal trading of stolen artefacts had resolved in getting involved with the Russian Mafia. The government had decided to give you another chance, in other words, send you on a pointless mission with James Conrad and a few other hopeless souls to do research for a couple of mad scientists instead of throwing you in prison. You were hardly a trustworthy and innocent young woman—something James made sure to remind you of whenever you spoke up and suggested different strategies.

Shock waves of pure electricity rippled through you whenever he impaled you with his stern blue gaze, an effect you hated he had on you. You knew you had screwed up, you knew you had done bad things. You knew you regularly imagined him bending you over his lap and spanking your backside until it was bright red whenever he looked at you like that… almost as if he was trying to read your thoughts. You sincerely hoped he couldn’t.

“If we hurry up, we can reach the top of the mountain by sunset,” he just explained, drawing a map into the sand with a dry branch. “We climb the front and set up camp near the forest. Someone will guard the fire, we don’t know what wild animals lurk in the shadows.”

You frowned at the dirt to your feet, a disgusted expression on your face. “How are we supposed to climb? Did you happen to have brought professional gear with you? All we have is a bit of rope.”

“One could have thought breaking into museums to steal paintings and jewellery gave you a bit of experience in that area.” James shot back, staring daggers at you. Swallowing thickly, you turned away again. Arsehole.

“Then let’s go. I’m hungry.” His name was Slivko. A very young man and a soldier—way too immature and childish for you but at least, he did not treat you like vermin.

James nodded, ignoring his unnecessary comment. Much more important than food was to reach the summit without falling to your deaths—and doing so before the sun would set. Standing up, he brushed the sand off his knees and shouldered his gun. You all followed suit, hoping for the best.

It took you a rough twenty minutes to reach said mountain. Twenty, silent minutes you spent attempting to kill James with but a single glare… if he noticed, he did not show.

“I say we split up. Slivko, take some of this rope and make sure you don’t slip.” James turned to you. “You stay with me.”

You smiled bitterly. “Aw… and there I was already building a raft to escape.”

Yet, he replied nothing when he approached you and tied the rope around your hips. You shivered involuntarily when his fingers brushed against your body ever so slightly. The other end, he tied around his own hips so you could both fall to your deaths. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes.

“Let’s go.”

Slivko and his team went first, spreading out across the vertical surface of the rocky mountain. There were a few roots and thinner tree stubs to hold onto but mostly, it was solid stone you were dealing with. You could already feel the blisters and bruises you would be treating tonight.

James was right. You did have experience with climbing. You had once climbed the Louvre and avoided the security guards, not harming a fly. Still, there was a massive difference between a modern building and a crumbling mountain.

Reluctantly, you began to heave yourself up next to James, watching his every move before making your own. Any step could be your last the higher you climbed—especially on a deserted island. You couldn’t exactly say you were afraid of heights but when you looked down to where you had started, you felt a little sick. Usually, you climbed with professional gear. Security measures that would prevent you from dying in case you slipped and fell. Now, there was nothing.

The rocks were getting wobblier with every single metre. Little bits and pieces rained down on you both, coming from where Slivko and the other soldiers were climbing. A crunchy sound echoed through the air, earning him a strict “Watch it!” from James. Perhaps it was too late for that—for when you looked up with a shocked expression, the heavy rock, about twice as big as you, was already shaking. You all halted, holding your breaths. Then, the rock fell, causing an ear-piercing rock fall.

“Hold on tight!” You heard James screaming. Hold on tight? How? Your right hand slipped, leaving you holding on to the stone wall with your left hand only as one of the rocks as big as your head dashed past you. You were about to steady yourself when it was James who let go. No… he didn’t let go. The rocks he had been holding on to crumbled from the impact, ripping him into the depth beneath you. The rope between you stretched, the force of his body weight pulling you down with him and you were falling.

Panicking, you closed your eyes. This was not how you had wanted to die. Would you feel the collision with the ground? You might not be a decent person but you still had things to live for! You didn’t want to die, you didn’t want to… all of a sudden, all air was knocked from your lungs, causing you to gasp loudly. The rope cut into your skin, burning horribly. When you finally dared to open your eyes again, you were dangling from a cliff. Conrad was above you, his face distorted from exhaustion. He must have landed on the ledge!

“Climb the rope, (Y/N)!” He bellowed, his voice dripping with pain. He did not need to tell you twice. Quickly, you pulled yourself up until James could wrap his arms around your shoulders. Your whole body was shaking when you curled up on the dirty ground, adrenaline still cursing through your veins. Never before had you faced the Grim Reaper eye to eye.

“The… others?” You managed to choke out. James was still panting. He peeked over the edge, his expression darkening. He didn’t need to tell you what he saw. There must have been corpses at the bottom of the mountain.

“I can’t see them all. They might have survived.”

“So contact them.” You insisted, looking around yourself. The ledge you were sitting on formed the entrance to a dark cave. It appeared uninhabited and might just pose as a shelter for the night.

But James was already fondling his radio. “My bloody radio is broken, (Y/N).”

“So what the hell do we do? We need to get out of here.”

James turned, his blue gaze deadly as it bore into yours. Enraged, he pointed at the sun. “Do you see this? It will be dark any moment now. Attempting to climb now would be suicide. We try again tomorrow and see if we can find the other survivors.” He paused, waiting for you to react. When you only nodded, he went on. “Stay here. I will explore the cave, see if it’s safe.”

“Absolutely not. If you get shredded to pieces by a wolf or a bear, I’ll be on my own! And I really don’t want to eat your body parts to survive.”

Conrad only shook his head, clearly repulsed by the idea. “Stay where you are, (Y/N).”

Surprising yourself though, you actually stayed put, waiting for him to return and spending the time checking your body for any injuries. There was a huge, wet blood stain on your stomach. When you lifted your shirt you found a cut right above your navel. Nothing too deep, you figured. It stung a little but with the disinfection spray in your backpack and a band aid you should be fine.

James returned to you just when the sun began to set. “It seems fine to me. There are no traces of animals living in here.” He paused. “You’re bleeding.” And for the first time since you had first met, he did not sound condescending. James seemed to be downright concerned for you, if anything because you were still trembling. In the end, you were a woman alone in the wilderness and even though you were hardly helpless, in this very moment you needed him.

“It’s nothing. I’ll patch myself up.”

“I can help you. Go inside and lie down.” You swallowed. There was no point in refusing now, was there? So you obliged, taking off your shirt to let it dry, leaving you in your sports bra only. Behind you, James hissed.

“Here. Take my jacket and lie down. And give me your backpack.”

Sighing, you did as you were told, watching him intensely as he tended to your wound to ignore the pain. But once he was done, you were shaking even more. For a brief moment you wished his fingers would linger on your naked skin just for a bit longer.

“Sleep a little. I’m gonna try and repair the radio.” James’ hand brushed against your arm so gently and reassuringly he left you behind completely astounded. Wow. Just for a second you could, almost, believe that you didn’t quite hate him after all—and that he didn’t hate you either. Only then was it he seemed to realise his “mistake”. He withdrew as if he had burned himself, hurrying away.

You awoke around an hour later, ripped from sleep cruelly by an animalistic moan. Your eyes narrowed. Thinking at first the cave might be inhabited by animals after all, you flinched and listened again closely. Oh no, it was speaking. Cursing, to be precise. You rolled your eyes as you got up to join James only a few metres away from where you had rested, stepping closer quietly. Apparently, he was still trying to repair that radio. But…

“Fuck… ah…” He was panting. Holding your breath, you inched even closer to him, watching the muscles on his back flex with every movement. It was only then you realised what he was doing. This man had the audacity to masturbate in this godforsaken situation! Your jaw dropped. You could not see him but it was obvious enough now what was happening.

Your curiosity you could understand, not however, that you desperately wished to join him. You hated James for your very own reasons but that did not mean you had to find him repulsive, right? Quite on the contrary… he was incredibly hot. What would he look like, you wondered? How… long and thick would he be and Gods, what would it look like when he spurted his cum into his own fist?

“Fuck…” You heard him again. You bit your lower lip. “(Y/N)…” Yes… wait, what?! Had he just said your name?! Was he masturbating… to you? Your eyes widened when you remembered his flustered reaction when you took off your shirt to let the blood dry, wearing no more than your sports bra and now his jacket too to keep warm.

You couldn’t watch him finish… not without your help. A malicious smirk spread on your lips when you approached him, placing one of your hands on his back while the other sneaked around his waist to grab his hard cock, simply pushing his own hand away.

James tensed. You could tell he was glaring down at your fist grasping his aroused rut, feeling his thick shaft pulsing beneath your touch. Suppressing a moan, you said nothing as you began to jerk him off, finding just the right pace to drive him crazy soon enough.

“You’re awake…” He choked out, his chest heaving.

“You called me. You could have just asked, you know.” You teased him, grinning mischievously behind his back. You could practically feel him rolling his eyes only to moan the fraction of a second later, causing you to giggle at him.

Losing all of his self-control, his composure fell off of him like a heavy coat as he began to groan wildly and thrust into your fist for more friction. And oh sweet Gods, witnessing and feeling him cum felt even more enticing than you could have possibly imagined. James’ cock twitched in your hand, shooting his seed all over your fingers and onto the rock wall in front of you both. The urge to draw away and lick your digits clean was strong, yet you helped him ride out his orgasm, listening to his animalistic growls until he had calmed enough to turn around slowly, his member beginning to soften again.

For usually, his blue gaze was judging and condescending, it was now lustful and demanding. Like a predator, James towered above you, ready to devour you like prey. You knew there was a difference between love and lust and you certainly didn’t expect anything to change between you now… well, nothing but hot and dirty sex, maybe—the true definition of a quick and good hate fuck.

You were already half naked and you were more than ready to rip those trousers off your body and have him take you so thoroughly you would be unable to walk tomorrow.

“We both know this is a bad idea.” He purred darkly then, inching so close you could feel his warm breath on your lips. He was right, of course. You were not on the pill and first aid kits usually didn’t come with a stash of condoms.

“You could just… return the favour, you know.” Your voice was shaking. For Fuck’s sake, why was your voice shaking? Your arousal was pooling between your legs, robbing you of your senses. James was about to reply, a cheeky smile forming on his lips when suddenly, the radio began to rustle.

“Captain Conrad, Captain Conrad, please respond, Captain Conrad!”

Just like that, the heated moment was gone. Pulling his trousers back up again, James’ eyes widened as he hurried over to the little device and yelled clear and stern orders into it—you would meet the rest of the team, what was left of it, tomorrow, near the summit of the mountain, to finish this suicidal expedition and finally go home. Yet when his blue eyes locked with yours again, there was a carnal longing and desire sparkling in them; a silent promise that he was not quite done with you yet.

A/N: Part II coming soon! ;-)

If you enjoyed this story, I’d be flattered if you supported me on KoFi! kofi.com/sserpente (or hit the “Support me” button on my blog) ♥

[lovemesomesurveys]

how do you dot your i’s? I just put a little dot, usually. Sometimes if I’m writing in a birthday card or something I’ll make it cute with little hearts instead of dots.

who was the last person you sat beside at a restaurant? The last time I went to a restaurant, which was at the beginning of this year, I sat across from my mom and brother.

where is the person who has your heart at the moment? I’m right here.

what happened at 10:00 am? It’s only 5:18AM, but I plan on being asleep at that time.

what would you do if someone ran at you with a knife? I’d probably get stabbed and die, let’s be honest. Or at least severely injured. <<< D: Same.

have you ever taken someone back after they hurt you? Yes.

what were you doing at midnight last night? Making ramen and watching TikToks. 

who was the first person you talked to today? My mom and brother.

is your hair longer than your shoulders? Yeah, it’s down to my butt.

you can only drink one liquid for the rest of your life, what is it? Could I have coffee? I really wouldn’t want to go without that for the rest of my life.

have you kissed anyone in the last 24 hours? No.

how much money did you spend today? None as of now. I don’t plan on spending any later either.

what will you be doing tomorrow? Same stuff, different day.

how do you feel about your hair right now? It’s a mess. 

is your best friend a slut? No.

when was the last time you talked to one of your ex’s? Almost 5 years ago.

is there someone that you believe you will always be attached to? My loved ones. I used to also think I would be to Joseph and Ty, but honestly as the years go on I’ve found that not to be the case.

what did you wear today? I’m wearing black leggings and a gray shirt.

what are you doing after this? Another survey.

last hug from the opposite sex? My dad.

would you ever dye your hair blonde? I had blonde highlights for several years, but I’d never go full blonde. It wouldn’t look good on me.

when you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought? I haven’t done that, yet. I avoid looking at myself as much as possible and when I do, I try to make it brief. I just hate the way I look and it’d only get worse if I spend too long in front of a mirror. Everything just becomes intensified for me.

what’s a word that rhymes with door? Floor.

do you write notes on your hand? Nope, not anymore - that was definitely during my middle school phase. <<< Same. And a little in high school.

do you know someone with the same middle name as you? Yeah, a few people.

three days from now, will you be in a relationship? Nope.

has someone ever made you a promise and broke it? Yep.

do you believe your ex thinks about you? Ha, no. I truly feel like he forgot I even exist. He’s not on social media much at all (if at all anymore, I don’t know. Unless he just lurks) so I feel like I’m just off his radar. That’d be the only way he’d see me, so. We haven’t talked or seen each other in almost 5 years. I don’t feel like I’ve made the impact on him that he made on me. It was like once we were done that was it for him. He also doesn’t do surveys, as far as I know, that constantly bring up exes. 

[blackberrywidow]

Stay

Paring: Bucky x reader

Summary: With your life being threatened by a megalomaniac with a murderous streak, Bucky takes it upon himself to keep you safe. Even at the cost of some slight cuddling.

Prompt: “I’m staying with you.”

Warnings: Fluff, slight language.

Words: 1.8k

A/N: Written for @jewelswrites-ish‘s 1k writing challenge. Yes, I did just sigh up for this three hours ago and yes I did drop two other wips to do this, but when inspiration strikes… I know this is short, but I hope everyone likes it.

---

“Thanks for walking me home,” you sighed as you came upon the brightly painted red door of your apartment. It was a bit ostentatious for your tastes, but at least it was easy to find when you were drunk out of your mind. Or exhausted and on the run from a murderer, as was the case now. “It wasn’t really necessary, but I appreciate it all the same.”

“Of course,” Bucky responded, appearing to all the world completely at ease. You knew better though—his eyes scanned the perimeter of your building vigilantly as you fumbled for your keys. His hands were resting casually in his pockets, purposefully near the gun at his waist. He stood only a few inches away from you, blocking your body from the street, and you could feel the heat radiating off of him in the cold winter air. It was distracting, to say the least.

Shaking yourself from your poorly timed thoughts of what it would be like to seek out his warmth a bit more intimately, you finally managed to place your key in the lock and turn it—only to be stopped by a hand to your wrist.

“Let me go in first,” Bucky ordered, blue eyes flashing with intensity in the low light.

You considered protesting—you were a trained S.H.I.E.L.D. agent yourself, and you knew how to clear a room. But Bucky had been asked to get you to your apartment safely, and he was taking that job veryseriously. Any such protests would be swiftly ignored.

You moved out of the way, gesturing grandly with your hands for him to lead the way. He offered you a brief smirk in response before pulling out his gun and nudging the door open with the toe of his boot.

You drew your own weapon, holding it up and ready as you moved in silently behind Bucky and closed the door, ready to cover him if need be. Fortunately, it wasn’t necessary. Your apartment was blessedly tiny, so the two of you were able to check every inch of it for any potential threat within two minutes. Completely empty, save a pair of trained spies that were too exhausted to be dealing with this shit.

You breathed a sigh of relief as you finished the search back in your living room, holstering your gun securely at your hip. “Great. One hundred percent clear of any assassins lurking about, ready to kill me. Which means I’m going to bed,” you dismissed him, heading back to your bedroom on heavy feet. It had been a long day, and you were hoping to still catch a few hours of sleep before you had to head back to the tower at eight o’clock. “Just lock the door behind you. I’ll see ya tomorrow.”

“Wait,” Bucky protested, turning with you and grabbing your wrist in his cool, metal hand. “You can’t be serious.”

You blinked down at the hand that was wrapped gently, yet still firmly around your wrist before moving your gaze up to his. His eyes were still doing that strange, intensely serious thing that they had been since Tony had given you the news, and you were growing more and more confused by the second. “I am serious, Bucky. I only got like, 4 hours of sleep last night and I’m completely drained. So… yeah. Bed. Goodnight.”  

You tried to extract your arm from his grip, but his hold only tightened as he shook his head. “Wilson Fisk—one of the biggest crime bosses in the country—wants you dead, and you’re just going to go to bed like nothing’s wrong? Are you insane?”

“Yes,” you said easily, though a frown was now tugging at your lips. He was treating you like you were stupid, a major pet peeve of yours. “I can’t stay awake forever, and the rest of the Avengers are out there right now looking for Fisk and his goons. I’m as safe right now as I’ll ever be, with or without a hit out on me. That’s part of the job.”

“This is different, and you know it,” he shot back, abruptly letting go of your wrist to run his fingers through his hair. “It’s like… you’re a sitting duck here, (Y/N). You’re just waiting for someone to show up and put a bullet in your head, and you’re acting like everything is just fine.”

“We put our lives on the line every day, Buck,” you sighed, running a hand down your face as your eyes started to droop. You were waytoo tired to be having this conversation. “And honestly, I am kind of freaking out. But it’s the nature of the job, and I don’t have the time or willpower to stay vigilant for the next few days while we track him down. So yeah, I’m going to bed, and I wish anyone who tries to break into my home and kill me luck. I’m a light sleeper and an even better shot.”

You gave him a small, teasing smile which he reluctantly returned, which immediately made you forgive any previous irritation. You chalked it up as a win and began inching your way back to your room. But the next words out of his mouth made you freeze.

“I’m staying with you.”

Your eyes, half-closed and clouded with sleep moments before, snapped wide open in shock. “What?”

His mouth twitched up a bit at your stupid question, but he remained entirely professional as he crossed his arms and stared you down. “I said that I’m staying, (Y/N). You’re in no condition to properly defend yourself if someone does come for you here, and it’s my job to protect you. So, I’m staying. Go to bed, I’ll be here when you wake up.”

Your lips pressed together in a thin line, and you cocked a brow at him. “Really? It’s your job to protect me now? Steve just said to get me home—mission accomplished. Now go to your own apartment and get some rest. I know you’ve been up just as long as I have, if not longer. I don’t need you to babysit me.”

“No,” Bucky insisted, his voice harsher than you had ever heard it. “I’m not leaving you alone. I know that you’re more than capable of defending yourself—hell, I’ve seen you destroy men twice your size firsthand. But that doesn’t make you invulnerable, and until such a feat occurs, I’m staying.” His tone was firm, resolute, and he dropped down on your couch to demonstrate his point.

“…Why?” you asked, the question coming out more hesitant and breathier than you wanted in the still quiet of the room.

Bucky took a deep breath, seeming to consider your question seriously as you waited in the doorway of your room…for what you weren’t really sure. Until he spoke, that is.

“It’s my job to protect you. Not because Stark or Steve told me to, but because I… becauseI want to. Because the thought of you in danger makes me sick, and the thought of you dead makes me furious.” He finally brought his eyes back up to yours, and the ferocity and sincerity that shown in their azure depths took your breath away. “I’m staying because I have no choice, (Y/N). Not really. So, I suggest you just get used to it.”

You smiled—the slope of your lips slight, but more genuine and brighter than it had been since this Fisk business had started. Something seemed to click into place with his words, and it didn’t matter that he couldn’t bring himself to say what you both felt. This was enough.

“Come on then,” you sighed, holding out a hand to him. “There’s room for both of us in my bed, and there’s no reason either of us should miss out on sleep. We both know no one is going to sneak up on you, even when unconscious. Besides,” you teased, your grin becoming the slightest bit wicked as he stared at you with wide eyes, “there’s safety in numbers, right?”

He considered you for only a moment longer before seeming to resolve himself. He reached out, placing a warm, calloused hand in yours and allowed you to lead him to your bed.

You went through your normal bedtime routine—washing your face, brushing your teeth and hair, stripping down to your underwear (though this time you were considerate enough to throw on a pair of sleep shorts and a tank top as well). By the time you were finished, Bucky had divested himself of his weapons and gear, and was sitting awkwardly on your bed in only his t-shirt and jeans.

Your briefly considered telling him he could take off his pants if he were uncomfortable, but you knew that would have the opposite effect. Bucky was still readjusting to life in the 21stcentury—life in control of his own actions. Being here and being honest with you was probably hard enough as it was.

You crossed the room and threw yourself down on the other side of the bed without a word, causing Bucky to release a chuckle and relax a bit, inkling back on your head board. You wormed your way under the covers and over to him.

“Do you normally sleep sitting up like that?” you asked groggily, eyes peeking up at him from just above the comforter.

He smiled down at you, shaking his head. “I told you, doll. I’m n—”

“Oh, shut up,” you sighed irritably, one hand snapping out from under the blanket to grip his bicep and yank him down until he had half-fallen on top of you.

As okay as you were with the position, he righted himself with a sigh. He did remain laying though, only shifting so he was beside you rather than on top of you, so you let it side. Well, sort of.

Once he had found a comfortable position, lying above the covers, completely straight with his hands behind his head, you wiggled your way back over to him and curled into his side. He let out a surprised exhale, which you resolutely ignored to burrow your head into the crook of his shoulder.

“Mmmm,” you sighed dazedly. “So warm.”

He had tensed the moment your skin made contact with his, but he gradually let it drain from him as he chuckled. “Goodnight, (Y/N). Sweet dreams.”

You couldn’t be sure, but you thought you felt him hesitate a moment before he leaned down and pressed his lips tenderly against your forehead.

You sighed contentedly, all thoughts of mob bosses and assassination attempts fleeing from your mind. In Bucky’s arms, it was impossible to feel anything other than safe and content. “I’m already having the sweetest dream, Buck.”

It was a delirious, sleep-deprived thought that you would surely regret in the morning. But the ensuing sound of Bucky’s deep chuckle and the feel of it rumbling in his chest sent you off to the deepest sleep you had had in years, so maybe it was worth it.

Taglist: @sugarplumparker, @desir-ae, @everythingbooknerd

[seanfknmacguire]

Under the cut is the beginning to a project I’m doing, where I’m writing my OCs into the story of RDR2. The OCs I’m using are Hosea’s twins, Dutch’s daughter, my first OC and an OC of mine which is a rival of Sean’s. I might also add in my OC inspired from Ellie from The Last Of Us later. I have no confidence in this so any replies or tips are welcome :)  I’ll probably do a whole post of OC introductions soon. Please let me know what you think <3 

In the dead of night and the worst snowstorm 1899 had seen, Dutch Van Der Linde led the Van Der Linde gang through the snowy mountains, having only just gotten out of the small town of Blackwater after a robbery gone wrong. Sitting next to a Hosea Matthews, they looked on for some shelter, trying to keep their family warm. 

Amelia Silverton was following on horseback, her oversized coat, a gift from Arthur, wrapped firmly around her shoulders as she shivered. The young 20 year old watched Abigail and Luna work on Davey, a member of their gang who had been fatally injured, and sighed. She wondered just how on earth they had gotten themselves in that situation. Moving her brown hair out of her face, she looked behind her to check on the twins.

The twins, Lily and Nick Matthews, were the spitting image of their mother Bessie who had unfortunately already passed. Their father Hosea was fiercely protective, always keeping a close eye as they always got themselves into mischief as 17 year olds should. The pair were inseparable, following the caravan closely in fear of getting lost.

Luna Van Der Linde was helping Abigail work on Davey in the medical wagon. The short 16 year old being a huge help in the medical field - almost as if it were a gift. She kept an eye on Davey’s wounds, keeping pressure on them as instructed by Abigail and Reverend Swanson.

Connor Kingston had kept his mouth shut for once and instead followed the caravan, keeping guard at the back alongside Javier. The mouthy 22 year old always had an opinion for everything, and didn’t exactly get along with a lot of the gang. He made up for it with fighting - he was a damn good fighter, and a valuable asset to the group, as much as Amelia or Luna didn’t want to admit it.

“Abigail says he’s dyin’, Dutch. We have to stop some place.” Reverend Swanson warned up at Dutch and Hosea, his hoarse voice no match for the loud wind.

“Okay, Arthur’s out looking - I sent him up ahead.” Dutch responded, not sure how on earth he could help apart from wait until Arthur got back. He had a hell of a lot on his plate - Sean and Mac missing, Davey on death’s door, and trying to find a place for the people relying on him to stay.

“If we don’t stop soon we’ll all be dying. This weather, it’s May… I’m just hoping the law got as lost as we did.” Hosea’s voice came from beside Dutch, the bitter cold biting at his face as he shivered. The cold wasn’t good for his bones. The two noticed a silhouette in front of them, and were on alert until they recognised it to be Arthur.

“Arthur! Any luck?” Dutch called forward, his voice hopeful. He was desperately praying that Arthur had found something useful.

Arthur dipped his hat, wiping the fresh snow from its hilts. "I found a place where we can get some shelter!" he shouted in response, the aggression of the blizzard rendering him difficult to hear. "Let Davey rest while he... You know." he added on, the gruffness of his voice growing stronger.

"Come on!" Dutch called to the rest of the group, speeding up the wagon he was steering. He was relieved, suddenly getting almost excited to get everyone inside near a warm fire. It only took them a little while to get to the little mining town, Dutch checking on each individual member as Hosea checked the building they were about to bring Davey into. Making sure there was no danger, he called back outside. “Bring him in here!” Amelia dismounted her horse, taking it into the building they were going to use as shelter for them and tried to keep herself as wrapped as possible. She helped Nick bring all of the horses in, having no time to talk as she focused. Patting him on the shoulder once they had finished, they made their way to the main building with everyone else. Lily and Luna followed the gang into the house, quickly taking a seat. It wasn’t warm yet, but hell, it was out of the wind. Luna looked around at everyone’s faces, and she couldn’t tell if they were full of hope or full of fear. Connor wandered in with Javier and Bill, putting his gun back into his holster now they were finally in and safe. He smiled at young Jack, walking over to the fire and placing some logs inside of the fireplace ready.

Abigail took a stand next to Davey, ready to patch him up properly now they were in shelter when she noticed he wasn't breathing. She looked at his chest - no movement. She put her head near his nostrils - no air coming out. "Davey's dead." She said sadly. Amelia sighed, looking down sadly. They'd lost a lot of people. They didn't even know if Mac and Sean were alive, and worry sat in the pit of her stomach as well as everyone else's. It was evident to Dutch spirits were low.

"There was... Nothing more you could've done," Reverend Swanson peered over to the brunette, dipping his head.

"What are we gonna do, we need supplies?" Hosea asked, closing Davey's eyes with two fingers and looking up at Dutch. He watched him move, nodding at the man.

"Well first of all you are gonna stay here, and you are gonna get yourself warm." Dutch looked at Hosea, a hand on his shoulder briefly. "Now I sent John and Micah scouting out ahead. Arthur and I, we're gonna ride out and see if we can find one of them."

"In this!?" Arthur waved to the outdoors, frowning a bit. He didn’t exactly want to go outside, it was a death trap.

"Just for a short bit. I don't see what other choice we have.” Dutch reassured, looking at the faces of his gang. They needed some motivation, fast. "Listen... Listen to me all of you, for a moment. Now we've had a bad couple of days. I loved Davey, and Jenny... Sean, Mac, they may be okay, we don't know."

Amelia looked down at the mention of Sean, but soon perked back up. She was worried. They weren’t exactly together, but there was definitely something there - the whole damn gang could see it. Luna listened to her father intently as well as the others.

“But we lost some folk. Now if I could throw myself into the ground in their stead, I'd do it. Gladly. But we are gonna ride out, and we are gonna find some food. Everyone, we're safe now. There ain’t nobody following us in a storm like this. And by the time they get here we'll be long gone. We've been through worse than this before. Mr Pearson, Miss Grimshaw, I need you to turn this place into a camp. We may be here for a few days. Now all of you, all of you, stay strong. Stay with me. We ain't done yet." He said with a strong tone, nodding towards the door. “Come on Arthur.” He finished strongly, reaching and squeezing Luna’s hand quickly before walking out of the door with Arthur. The gang sat in silence for a few moments, before Connor decided to lift some spirits.

“So… Lovely weather we’re having.”

------------------------------

“So what’s the plan Dutch?”

Night had fallen on the gang’s makeshift camp, members eating the stew that Pearson made from the deer Arthur and Charles had caught the day before. John was also back- Luna cleaning the wound on his cheek before she ate. A lot had happened since they arrived, including rescuing a widow, Sadie, taking out a whole O’Driscoll camp and capturing a young O’Driscoll, Kieran. The gang had gathered in the main room, wondering just what on earth they could do and where they could go. They couldn’t stay in the mountains - they’d die within two weeks. Dutch racked his brain as he stared at a map, looking for possible places they could go. His eyes skimmed over the words Valentine, and nudged Arthur, pointing to the words.

“That’s a lotta civilisation, Dutch…” Arthur shook his head, glancing at the words on the map. They couldn’t go further north, or back west into Blackwater, and lord only knows what lurked direct south.

“I know, but I don’t see what other choice we have.” Dutch sighed. He turned to his tired family - all looking to him for some kind of idea. “We head West, into Valentine. I know a little spot we could use, for now, until we find a proper place.”

“What about Sean and Mac?” Amelia asked, leaning her arms on her knees as she sat on the floor next to Lily and Nick. She was worried mainly for Sean - not that she’d ever admit it.

“What about them? We can’t do nothin’, at least not right now.” Connor replied, a harsh tone in his voice. He and Amelia never really got along well - Amelia’s fiery personality and Connor’s always made them at loggerheads.

“We can’t just leave them.” She furrowed her eyebrows looking up at him.

“Look princess, I know you’re worried about the ginger, but let’s face it - he’s probably dead.” Connor shrugged, his Irish accent thick as he spoke. He and Sean never got along either.

“You take that back.” Amelia spat while standing up, her quick temper almost too quick in this situation.

“Both of you, stop it.” Hosea warned from beside Dutch. It wasn’t new to him to have to separate the two.

“This is the plan - We gather a few people to rob that damn train in the morning, while whoever stays behind packs up. We’ll get back and leave straight away, heading for that spot near Valentine.” Dutch spoke, his voice full of hope and confidence. Luna looked at her father with a smile - she wanted to be like him some day. She wanted nothing more than to go on the train robbery with them - but she knew Dutch would never allow it. Then again, what was the harm in asking?

“Now everyone - try and get some sleep. We have a big day tomorrow.” Dutch nodded to everyone. As everyone dispersed, Luna stuck around, getting up from her seat next to John and standing beside her father, Hosea and Arthur.

“You know, Pa… I was thinking.” She trailed off, looking up at Dutch with an innocent grin. She had him wrapped around her finger and she knew it. Dutch looked at her suspiciously before Arthur spoke.

“Don’t hurt yourself.” He joked, earning a small slap on the arm from Luna before turning back to Dutch.

“Ain’t it time I start coming on robberies with you fellers? You know I can shoot, and ain’t no-one gonna pick on a young girl.” She said hopefully. Dutch shook his head.

“Absolutely not. I can’t risk that darlin’, I’m sorry.”

“Hey hold on now Dutch, it might be a good idea.” Connor overheard the conversation and interjected, a hand on Luna’s shoulder. “She’s a bloody good shot and you kno’ it. What if she comes tomorrow? There’ll be plenty of us and you can see if she can handle it.”

“But-” He started, but stopped himself and sighed. It was a good idea.

“A simple train robbery, what can go wrong? After Blackwater I think we’ve used up all our bad luck. Besides, I’ll be fine, I got you guys if things go to chaos.” She looked up at Dutch hopefully, who sighed.

“Okay, fine. You stay back at all times, you’re never on your own and I don’t want you killin’ nobody, you hear?” Dutch pointed at her as she nodded. Luna was the spitting image of Dutch - the same curly, black hair, the same eyes and smile. “Now go get some sleep.” He smiled, kissing her on the forehead after nodding to the door. She smiled up at him, walking towards the door like everyone else, nerves bubbling in her stomach.

[alchemine]

Mind the Cat - Party Animals fanfic redux 1/2

If you’re wondering whether I’m dumping some of my reams of Party Animals fanfic here...that’s exactly what I’m doing. This one really is only two parts, though. I swear. 

“One more thing. I’ll need you to look after Coco for me.”

“The cat?” Danny glanced up at Jo over his notepad, which was already crammed with action items. It was Wednesday morning, and she was only scheduled to be away until Friday evening, but the act of leaving seemed to have triggered the part of her brain where she stored everything she’d been meaning to ask him to get around to someday.

“Do you know another Coco?” Jo zipped up her bag and hoisted it onto her shoulder, pulling a face at the weight. “She has half a pouch of wet food in the evenings, and then a bowl of dry cat biscuits for nibbling later. She’ll go out on her own during the day, just make certain she’s in at night because of the foxes.”

“Half a pouch...biscuits...foxes,” Danny mumbled to himself, scribbling notes. He knew Coco, who was a scrawny, scrappy, vaguely Siamese-looking cat that Jo had acquired from a sanctuary, but hadn’t expected her to be part of his workload in Jo’s absence. Still, it shouldn’t be too bad. Like her owner, Coco was stubborn and exacting and expressed her displeasure loudly when things weren’t done to her liking, but she could be quite sweet when she wanted to be--also like her owner, though he didn’t dare say so to Jo’s face--and he could drop in easily enough on his way to and from work.

He finished writing and looked back at Jo, pen poised. “Anything else?”

“Not unless you’d like to go in my place,” Jo said morosely. “I’m not looking forward to this.”

“You’re the one who lobbied to be elected to the committee.”

“Don’t remind me. Have you got the key?”

“It’s in my pocket. Hurry or you’ll be late.”

Jo left, and Danny settled in to sort through his massive to-do list, eliminating out of hand all the items that he knew she’d have forgotten by the time she returned. This still left him more than enough to be getting on with, and between that and answering the phone, he was kept busy all the way up to early evening, when he finally closed up the office and headed to Jo’s to discharge his cat-sitting duties. 

He let himself in at the front door, and before he could even call for Coco, she came running to greet him, all noisy complaints and question-mark tail, and wound herself between his ankles so he nearly tripped over her.

“Relax, I’m going to feed you--argh! For Christ’s sake, Coco, she’s only been gone for a few hours. Get out from under my feet.”

Clearly unconvinced of his trustworthiness, Coco trailed him into Jo’s kitchen, sprang up onto the white tile worktop and paced there, mewing insistently, as he dispensed half a pouch of tuna and whitefish onto a saucer that he found in the cupboard. By the time he’d filled her dry food and water bowls, she’d gobbled it all down and was obsessively licking her whiskers, with a watchful eye on him to see whether more might be forthcoming.

“Sorry, I’ve got my instructions. Half a pouch per night.” Danny scratched her under the chin, and she leaned into it, a rumbling purr starting in her throat. “Do you like that? What if I rub your ears? Oh, that’s nice, isn’t it? Yes it is--” 

Here he realised he was starting to devolve into nonsense and stopped, turning away to lock the cat flap and set the bowls down on the floor, where there was a plastic mat with a pattern of fish skeletons round its border. 

“There you are,” he said to Coco, who looked disgruntled at having her orgy of stroking interrupted. “I’ll be back in the morning to let you out. Don’t do anything Jo wouldn’t want you to do.”

Coco let out a trilling chirp, and as he headed for the door, Danny heard the thud of her paws hitting the kitchen floor as she jumped down to investigate what was in her everyday dish. Shaking his head, he locked the door behind him, tried it, tucked the key back into his pocket and went on his way, mentally ticking feed cat off his list and already thinking about what he was going to feed self when he got home. It had been a long day. 

Getting up early the following morning to make the return trip to Jo’s wasn’t as easy as stopping on his way home had been, but he managed it and pushed the door open on a bright, quiet space. Jo had tall windows dressed with thin white curtains, and even Danny, who wasn’t a decorating expert, had to admire the way the early sunlight filtered artfully through them like something in a magazine spread. He tossed the key onto a table and his bag onto the sofa, and just then realised that Coco hadn’t come running the way she’d done the previous night.

“Coco?”

Silence. Danny pushed the door shut behind him and ventured farther into the living room, waiting to hear the sound of galloping paws. Poets might write about the fog coming on little cat feet, but Coco sounded like a herd of elephants when she got up to speed on a bare floor.

“Coco? Where are you?”

Still nothing, and now he began to worry. He knew he’d locked the cat flap, but he went and checked anyway, finding it stuck firmly shut. Had Jo left a window open? A quick inspection revealed she hadn’t. That meant Coco must be somewhere inside, lying stretched out on top of the wardrobe or lurking behind the boiler, soaking up the warmth. His mum had had a cat when he and Scott were kids that had liked to curl up on the windowsill directly above the radiator; perhaps Coco had the same habit. 

Danny looked at his watch, looked at the food and water bowls, which were still nearly full, and decided that she’d be fine until he returned that evening. He unlocked the cat flap and left again, and by the time he’d reached the corner, all his thoughts were on the day ahead. 

It wasn’t until he was on his way back again, hungry and stiff-limbed after a long day in front of a computer monitor, that he began to feel uneasy about whether Coco would have emerged from her hiding place or not--an uneasiness that turned into near panic when he opened the door and there was still no sign of her. She couldn’t possibly have got out during his visit last night, and even if she’d left through the cat flap during the day, she’d be back for the other half of her tuna and whitefish by now, wouldn’t she?

“Coco,” he called again, and his voice echoed forlornly through the empty space, in a way that clearly indicated Don’t get your hopes up, Daniel.

All right, he would have to search. He could do that. It wasn’t a very big place, and anyway he’d helped Jo move in and visited countless times since then; he knew the layout as well as he knew his own bedroom at Scott’s. He dug into cupboards, looked behind furniture, opened doors and checked the tops of things, calling out and making the most tempting cat-summoning noises he could think of as he went, but Coco seemed to have vanished into the Twilight Zone.

At that point he got either more creative or more desperate, and started looking in unlikely places just to say he’d checked them. He opened the fridge and made a mental note to place an online shopping order for Jo as soon as she got home. He pulled off the sofa cushions in case Coco had somehow managed to wedge herself down the back. He had just opened a drawer full of Jo’s bras and immediately slammed it shut again when his phone went off in his pocket, and he fished it out with one hand and answered without checking to see who it was.

“Yeah?”

“What sort of way is that to answer the phone, Danny?” Jo’s voice filled his ear and he nearly swallowed his tongue.

“Sorry. I was...distracted.”

“Distracted by what?”

“I just got in to feed Coco.” It was true enough, he thought. He would be feeding Coco if Coco were here. The fact that Jo didn’t know she wasn’t was completely beside the point.

“Oh, that’s good.” Jo’s tone softened at the mention of her pet. “How is she?”

“She’s great,” Danny said, hoping he sounded casual. “But she’s probably hungry, so I’d better go. I’ll phone you tomorrow morning and we can go over those changes to your speech. Bye.”

He hung up, glanced around to make certain he hadn’t left her bedroom looking as if it had been ransacked, and then went back to the kitchen, where he washed the saucer from the night before and dumped the rest of the food pouch onto it. Whether to lock the cat flap or not was another question: if he locked it and Coco had gone out, she would come back to a barred door, and if he didn’t lock it and she hadn’t gone out, she might slip out now and spend the night fighting with dodgy urban foxes. Then Jo would kill him, which would be a lose-lose situation for everyone.

Finally he decided to compromise: he would lock the flap, but spend the night here, on the sofa, where he’d be able to hear a commotion at the door or, if he was lucky, catch Coco in the act of sneaking out of her hiding place to refuel at the food bowl. He found an overripe banana and half a packet of stale ready-salted crisps in the kitchen and ate them for dinner, fetched a spare pillow and blanket from the cupboard where Jo kept them, and then stretched himself out on the sofa with his laptop to read about how to lure a cat.

[just-jordie-things]

But I Love Her - Nolan Holloway

word count: 3421 warnings: friends disappointment, swearing request: hi I love your writing!! Can i please have another Nolan image? I love Nolan with all my heart ❤️. Maybe one where the two fall in love and the pack is at first against it, but then they see how happy the reader is and realize the reader has never been this happy before, so they allow it? Thanks so much!

y/n was getting ready for bed, already in a comfy sweatshirt and leggings with her hair messy from a late shower.  Her parents, who were away on business, were miles and miles away and she never felt safer.

They were werewolf hunters, and their ‘business’ was confidential to y/n.  But she didn’t want anything to do with it anyways.  And not just because she was a werewolf, and that not only her safety but the pack’s safety was threatened by having her parents in Beacon Hills, but she found it disgusting.  The supernatural were doing nothing to harm the people of the town, y/n didn’t see any reason to be sending mass hunting parties out and shooting up houses.  Like Scott’s had been the previous night.

y/n shuddered, crawling into bed and pulling the covers tightly over herself.  Checking her phone out of habit, she found multiple missed text messages.

[scott mccall] : don’t worry, my mom’s going to be completely fine, and she wanted me to tell you not to stress over her and just focus on staying safe.  So stay safe.

[scott mccall] to group : pack meeting tomorrow btw at mine, 11:00

She quickly set an alarm so she wouldn’t forget that.  Then went back to her messages.  Her heartbeat a little harder when she saw one from Nolan.

[nolan holloway] : stay safe tonight, sleep well <3

y/n smiled to herself before quickly replying.

[y/n] : you too, see you monday :)

Nolan was… well he was the exact opposite of what everyone else made him out to be.  The rest of the pack wasn’t too fond of him because of his involvement with the hunters, but y/n knew in her heart that he wasn’t with them anymore.  And she knew he never wanted to hurt anyone, he just wanted everyone to be safe.  As did she.  Everyone else… weren’t so forgiving.  Especially Liam.  In fact, there was a whole collection of texts that she purposefully hadn’t opened from Liam because of this.

After the beta found out that she were going out with Nolan, he went ballistic.  She and Nolan weren’t even anything serious yet, there wasn’t even a label on their relationship.  They just hung out sometimes, and sometimes that included holding hands and cuddling on the couch.  But there was still no ‘boyfriend-girlfriend’ label.  Sighing, and rolling over with her phone clutched in her hand, she clicked on Liam’s name in the text panel.

[Liam Dunbar] : you’re walking with him, i see you

[Liam Dunbar] : you’re holding hands

[Liam Dunbar] : i see your phone in your pocket, i know you know you’re getting these messages

[Liam Dunbar] : come on y/n/n, i’m trying to keep you safe here.  Please just talk to me about this

[Liam Dunbar] : i don’t want to fight.

y/n bit down on her lip, frowning as she read his texts from earlier that day.  She had been walking in the halls, and Nolan had been holding her hand, but that was no crime.  But at least he didn’t want to fight…

[y/n] : we’ll talk when there’s time, i don’t want to fight either

After sending the text, she set her phone on her nightstand and got comfortable under the covers again.

She needed to sleep off this whole mess.  She hadn’t had a full night of sleep in… well maybe two weeks, if she were being optimistic.  But maybe tonight would change that.

Nolan was pacing around his house, phone in hand as always, just in case.  He never strayed too far from it, always waiting for a text.  From Gabe, some kind of update, or from y/n.  He hadn’t changed for bed, even though it was nearing midnight.  He wasn’t close to as tired as he probably should be.  He was far to anxious to trust going to sleep.  What if something happened?

His phone buzzed in his hand, and he looked at is easily.

[y/n] : you too, see you monday :)

His nerves relaxed at that, and he even smiled as he looked at the girl’s message.  She somehow managed to make everything seem a little easier, a little brighter.  And while she made him beyond nervous, she also relaxed his anxieties.  Something about her just reminded him that things always turn out okay in the end.

Nolan had had a crush on y/n for a while now, maybe since the beginning of their senior year.  But somewhere along the line their paths crossed at one of the lacrosse games.  y//n had gone to support Liam, and Scott’s coaching, and somehow afterwards she and Nolan struck up conversation.  Neither of them had never really talked before, sure they’d known each other, but that was about it.  But one thing led to another and suddenly they were exchanging numbers and snapchats, and now were here.

He wasn’t sure what they were, whether they were dating, or those really close friends that just do everything together.  But he wasn’t sure how to ask her either.  Does he ask if she’s his girlfriend? Or does he ask if she wants to be his girlfriend? Either way, he always imagined y/n laughing at either of those questions.

When Nolan found out y/n was a werewolf, it was after the mess he’d gotten himself into with the hunters.  He’d snuck his way out, but he still feared they’d come for him.  Or worse, y/n.  He remembered vividly how terrified she was when she told him she was a werewolf.  Her body shaking violently, and her hands were fumbling together as she stammered over her words.  But he hadn’t shamed her the way she’d expected, just hugged the girl and told her that she’d be safe.

He was interrupted from his thoughts by his phone ringing, and as soon as he saw the familiar name pop up on the screen he answered it.

“y/n/n? Are you alright? It’s late” He said almost instinctively.

“I-I-” y/ stuttered, followed by a few short breaths.  “I k-keep hearing these f-footsteps outside and I-” She were cut off by a long deep breath as she tried to keep herself composed while on the phone.  “I think there’s hunters h-here” She whispered.  Nolan shook his head quickly, even though y/n couldn’t see him.

“No, no there shouldn’t be, Gabe- he-”

“I’m freaking out” She murmured.  “What if they’re here for me?”

“Hey, hey” Nolan hushed as gently as he could.  “It’s fine, I’ll come over and check it out okay? It’ll be fine” He waited for a few long moments for her response, but gave her the time to speak.

“Okay” She whispered.  “Please… please hurry”

“I will”

y/n was watching out the window from her room, still hearing that familiar and eerie shuffling sound.  Like someone was sprinting around her lawn, trying to remain hidden.  She didn’t like it one bit.

When she saw Nolan’s car pull into the driveway, she raced for the stairs and made it to the front door just as he did, opening before the boy even had time to knock.

“Hey y/n-” She flung her arms around his torso and hugged him tightly in greeting.  He was taken back for a moment, only hugging her back for a few seconds before she pulled away again.

“Did you see anything? Outside?” She whispered, and he shook his head.

“No, but I just got here” He replied.  “I can go look around if you want, I’ll be right back” His hand rubbed over her arm momentarily before he headed back outside.  y/n went back upstairs, trying to watch from her window as she gnawed at her fingernails.  But even with her heightened senses, she couldn’t make much of what was happening, or where Nolan was.

Then she heard a loud yell, one of surprise, but no real words.

“What the hell!”

“What’re you doing here!?” Nolan shouted back.  y/n pressed her ear closer to the glass, but the voices were suddenly stopped, and two sets of footsteps were making their way back inside.

Liam was dragging Nolan back into the house, sprouting an angry expression, and Nolan didn’t look too happy either.

“Why the fuck are you at y/n’s?” The werewolf interrogated.  “Here to shoot up her house? Huh?”

“No!” Nolan said ludicrously.  “She called me, freaked out cause someone was lurking around her place!” He defended.

“Well maybe I wouldn’t have to lurk around if you weren’t such a threat! You can’t be with her Holloway” Liam deadpanned.  “You’re bad news, and she may not see it, but I do” Nolan shook his head slightly, not sure what to say to Liam at this point.  “You’re just going to get us all killed, including her”

“I’m not”

“You are” He cut Nolan off.  “And if you ever really did care about her, you’ll leave her alone.  Cause next time, it will be hunters here, and it’ll be your fault”

“You’re wrong, she’s safe” Nolan retorted.  “That’s why I’m here, you think I’m not doing everything I can to protect her?”

“If you want to protect her? Leave her!” Liam said, his arms opening wide with anger as he yelled slightly.

“I won’t do that, I love her” Nolan replied, not as loud, but just as serious.  His eyes were locked on Liam’s, and both boys went completely silent at the sudden proclamation.

“Guys?” A quiet voice called, and they both looked to the top of the steps.  There y/n appeared, walking down them with tired movements and wide eyes.  “What the hell is this? Liam why are you here?” She asked, though she’d already heard the whole argument and knew exactly what was going on.

“I came… I came here to talk to you y/n.  Like I said… in the texts”

“Bullshit” y/n murmured back.  “Why are you really here?” She asked again, crossing her arms as she stood between Nolan and Liam.

“I’m here…. I was hoping to…”

“To what, catch Nolan here? And then what? What was the big plan Liam? Banish him from my life?”

“y/n-”

“Fucking save it” She muttered, but not out of anger, out of sadness.  “You’re not my Dad Liam” She deadpanned.  “Your my friend.  And my family.  And you’re one of the only people who are supposed to accept and support my decisions unconditionally, because we’re supposed to care about each other.  That’s what pack means.  That’s what friendship means” Her voice grew quieter by the second, and as she went on, Nolan felt the urge to reach out and grasp her hand.  “You should go” She ended weakly.

Liam hung his head, mumbling a quiet goodbye before trudging out of the house.  She watched him leave, not saying a word until the door was shut.

“y/n” Nolan called softly, finally reaching out and grabbing onto her hand.  “Are you alright?” The girl shrugged her shoulders, not really having a grasp on her mix of emotions at the moment.

“Are you? He was pretty harsh”

“It’s alright.  I’m a nerd, I’m used to the brutality” He responded with a small smile.  It made her smile too, but it was sad, and forced.

“Hey did you…” y/n trailed off, looking down at their intertwined hands as she stepped forward closer to him.  “Did you mean all that stuff you said?” She asked him anxiously, and looked up at him with round doe eyes.  “About… keeping me safe and… and that other thing?”

Nolan nodded his head in a barely-there movement, staring down at her intently and adoringly.

“Yeah, I meant all that” He said quietly, and this time a genuine smile grew on her lips.  He let go of her hand to cup his palm over her cheek, his thumb stroking her skin softly.

“Look I… I know we’ve been hanging out a lot and I don’t really know where out boundaries are exactly, but I wanted to… to do something” y/n blinked, nodding her head slightly.

“Okay” She whispered back, staring intently at him.  Nolan bit slightly down on his lip, before gently tugging her towards him and placing almost a feather light kiss against her lips.  y/n’s eyes fluttered closed, though it only lasted a few seconds before they parted.  Cheeks pink and an noncontainable smile on her mouth, she gently set her hands at his sides and stood on the tips of her toes to kiss him again.

She could get used to this.

Nolan ended up spending the night on the sofa downstairs.  Only for y/n to run down the stairs after another shuffling sound and squeeze in with him.  Not that he minded, in his barely-conscious dream state, wrapping an arm over her like he had done it thousands of times before

Until the next morning, when he was suddenly wide awake, and very aware of how close he was holding the significantly-smaller-than-him girl.

He was fidgeting for a while before you woke up.

Nolan had hung around most of the next day, and y/n hadn’t mentioned that there was a pack meeting she’d ditched to be with him.  But she didn’t really care to go, after the way Liam treated her last night, she was certain the rest of the pack wouldn’t be all to on board with her seeing Nolan now.

She’d much rather spend the day lounging and talking with the human boy, than facing the disgusted and disappointed comments of her supernatural friends.  Part of her was a little hurt that this was how it turned out, but the other part didn’t give a damn.

She loved Nolan, and that wasn’t going to change just because her friends didn’t see him the way she did.

y/n was standing at her locker, pretending to be going through her things, while the rest of the pack were a few rows down, gathered around Liam’s locker and chatting.  She could hear them clearly, but had to peek out of the corner of her eyes to actually see them without being suspicious.

“I just don’t get it” Liam said.  “I don’t get how she can trust him, him and his idiot friend tried to kill me”

“Me either” Scott agreed.  “My mom…” He trailed off, not wanting to say anything else on the subject.

That wasn’t Nolan! y/n wanted to scream.  He had nothing to do with it!

“Hey y/n/n” The girl turned around, seeing her boyfriend standing there, a nervous but sweet smile on his lips.

“Hey” She smiled back almost instantly, reaching up to press a kiss to his cheek.  “You’re a sight for sore eyes” She told him softly, before closing her locker and leaning her back up against it.

“Oh yeah?” Nolan questioned, his nerves calming slightly.  y/n nodded her head a little, holding her notebooks close to her chest.  “Something happen?”

Her eyes darted towards her pack, still grouped up and conspiring about her new relationship.  Nolan’s gaze followed hers, and her frowned sadly, knowing what she meant in her silent stare.

“I see” He said quietly, stepping closer to her.  “I’m sorry” He added, his hands resting tentatively at her waist.  “It’s my fault, if you weren’t with me-”

y/n leaned up on her toes and pressed a quick peck to the boy’s lips, cutting off his ramblings.

“Don’t say that” She whispered.  “It’s not your fault, it’s not anyone’s fault” She assured him.  “I wouldn’t change a thing, I’m happy.  I’m happy with you” y/n said to him, biting back a grin as she smiled up at him.  Her hands were smoothing down the sleeves of his shirt, eyelashes batting anxiously.

“I’m happy with you too” He told her, unable to contain his own blossoming grin.  “I love you so much, I just don’t want to see you hurting, or losing your friends”

y/n cast a flicker of a glance towards her friends, and her eyes landed on Liam’s who was watching the scene with a frown.  Rolling her eyes, y/n looked back up at Nolan.

“I’m alright” She told him sincerely.  “It’ll work itself out eventually.  Things like this always does” Nolan nodded in response.

They hugged for a moment before he had to go to class, y/n walking the opposite way and wondering how long it’ll take for the pack to come around and see that the feelings her and Nolan shared were genuine.

“He really does love her” Liam said, his lip tugging down sadly as he looked back to his friends.

“Talking about Nolan and y/n/n?” Lydia asked as she walked up to the group that had been waiting for her in the hall.

“Yeah” Scott answered.

“Well of course he loves her, why, did he finally admit it?” The banshee asked, inspecting her manicured nails.

“Yeah-yeah last night” Liam said, brows contorting as he looked to the green eyed girl.  “Why, did you expect that?”

“Course I did” Lydia said, shaking her head incredulously.  “Why, are you surprised? It’s pretty damn obvious”

“Oh” Liam muttered.

“W-we thought…” Scott trailed off.

“y/n was in danger..” Stiles finished awkwardly.  Lydia rolled her eyes, hitting her human boyfriend’s arm.

“You’re an idiot!” She announced, then turned and whacked Liam and Scott’s arms as well.  “You’re all idiots! Those two have been smitten for each other for forever, I thought it’d never happen.  And you’re all here judging her for it?”

“Sorry” Liam mumbled almost incoherently.

“Sorry isn’t enough you dumbass, she’s your friend, and you shunned her” Lydia said assertively, and flipped her hair over her shoulder as she walked away.  “Better fix it!” She called out.

Frustrated, Liam ran after y/n where her first period class was.

y/n was sitting at her desk, halfway through the worksheet her teacher had handed out.  She had been surprised how easy it was, and was able to focus and forget all about her earlier troubles.  With earbuds in and her favorite songs playing, her pen seemed to scribble down all the answers with ease.

Suddenly the door was thrown open, and a loud gasp came from her teacher.

“Mr Dunbar!” They announced, and y/n’s head perked up at the name, whipping towards the door to see Liam standing there, panting.  “You need to leave-”

“I’ll just be a second” The beta replied, and was rushing over towards y/n’s desk.  The girl was frozen, staring at him with confusion as to what the hell he was doing here.

“What the hell are you doing-” She almost asked but he cut her off.

“y/n I am so so so sorry” Liam said, falling to his knees by her desk.  She looked around at her peers, who were watching the scene with an equal amount of both amusement and confusion.  “I let you down, I was not a good friend”

“Liam you-”

“Wait, just listen” He cut her off again.  “I shouldn’t have butted into yours and Nolan’s relationship, that was your business, not mine” He went on.  “And I shouldn’t have been such a dick about it either”

“Mr Dunbar you have thirty seconds before I give you a detention for disrupting my class” y/n’s teacher announced, crossing their arms and tapping their foot on the linoleum floor.  Liam quickly turned back to y/n.

“I’m sorry” He apologized quickly.  “You and Nolan love each other, a lot, I see it, and I trust you.  And I’ll learn to trust him too, for you.  You’re my best friend” He was speaking so quickly she almost didn’t hear everything he was saying.  But she smiled, understanding him.

“Thanks Liam” She said, leaning out of her seat slightly to hug him.

“Ten seconds!”

“You’re my best friend too, I forgive you” She told him before they pulled away and Liam was running back out the door.

A collective awe rang through the class from the other students, making y/n blush, and Liam laugh from halfway down the hall.

These things always did have a way of working out between the pack.  They were family like that.

sorry if this took super long!

taglist: @the-crime-fighting-spider @black-tights-black-heart

xoxo ~ jordie

[green-eyeddragonfanfiction]

Bah, HumBuck! Plan A

 Summary: You’re the newest Avenger. Realizing that Bucky plans to spend Christmas alone, you enlist the help of Wanda, your best friend, and Steve, Bucky’s best friend and your mentor. You’re determined to make his Christmas amazing. Pairing: Bucky x Female!Powered!Reader Word Count: ~2,242 Warnings: blood (just a bit), language, fluff A/N: This is for Sam’s Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree Writing Challenge. My prompt was #16, “’This was a terrible plan.’ ‘This was your plan.’” @lovelynemesis I definitely listened to the Pentatonix Yule Log playlist while writing this. Nonstop. On repeat. So good. It just makes me so happy. *gifs not mine*

Masterlist // Plan B (Next Chapter)

It was the morning of December 24th in upstate New York and the inside of the Avengers base had been decked out from top to bottom in ostentatious decorations. Sparkling trees decorated every level, accompanied by garlands, dazzling banners and streamers, and bafflingly intricate and expensive-looking wreaths.

The outside of the base was covered in a thick, fluffy layer of snow; a beautiful winter wonderland, indeed. By the time everyone had cleared out of the base for Christmas, it was only you, Steve, Wanda, Vision, and Bucky who remained.

Both you and Bucky were relatively recent additions to the team; he’d gotten back from Wakanda a year ago, Hydra-free, and you’d been recruited only shortly thereafter.

You didn’t like to toot your own horn too much, but your power -being able to create and control fire and heat- was pretty badass. However, just like fire itself, your powers were temperamental and hard to control. As such, you were assigned a mentor and weren’t put on active duty yet.

They chose Steve for you, which had taken you by surprise. Surely someone like Thor, Wanda, or Vision would have been a better choice? But it had been decided you’d benefit from Cap’s patient guidance and that his level-headed demeanor might even wear off on you a bit. To your superiors’ credit, it had been working so far. You were more likely to think before you acted now and your powers seemed to fight you less as of late. Still, no missions yet.

You were flipping idly through TV channels in the common room, steaming mug of tea clutched in your hand, when Wanda plopped down next to you. The smile on her face was one you knew well; it was full of the promise for fun.

“I know that look, Wanda. What’s going on?” you asked curiously, smirk dancing on your lips as you looked at your best friend.

“Wanda wishes to have a movie marathon with the two of us,” came Vision’s voice from behind the couch. You jerked your head back in surprise, craning to get a look at the red android. He was staring at you, blue eyes trained unwaveringly on your face.

“Vision, stop lurking and come sit down next to your girlfriend,” you ordered good-naturedly, pointing deliberately at the spot on the other side of Wanda from you. He acquiesced, face thoughtful as he considered your words.

Wanda’s cheeks were tinged pink at your statement and she reached for Vision’s hand once he’d sat down. Their fingers laced together and you smiled. They were so cute together; they’d only recently started dating officially. “Steve and Bucky are invited too, of course!” Wanda said hurriedly.

“I don’t think that’s happening,” said yet another intruder on your lovely Christmas Eve morning.

The three of you turned to look at Steve, who looked troubled.

“What do you mean, Cap’n?” you asked playfully, leaning your head onto the back of the sofa so you could stare at him more easily, brows raised in question.

“Bucky’s holed up in his room and won’t come out; Says he wants to spend Christmas alone,” Steve said as he walked over to the couch and sunk down next to you, anxiety radiating off of him in waves.

“No one wants to spend Christmas alone,” Wanda said disbelievingly.

“Data does suggest that most people prefer to spend this time of year with ones closest emotionally to them. This trend is especially prevalent-”

“Viz,” you said tersely, giving him a chastising look.

He stopped mid sentence, looking from you to Wanda, who was giving him a similar look.

“It is as Wanda says. No one wishes to spend Christmas alone,” he said, bowing his head slightly to her in acknowledgement and apology.

“I know that, but I can’t force him to come spend time with us,” Steve said, running a hand over his face in exasperation.

“Well, technically-” you began, finger held up in objection.

“No, (Y/N). Don’t go there,” Steve said, giving you a hard look.

“I wouldn’t actually force him! I’m just saying we technically could!” you said, motioning vaguely at the four of you, especially Wanda and Vision.

Steve groaned and buried his face in his hands.

“Okay, yeah, that’s the last resort. Got it,” you said, resting your chin on your hand while you thought of a better plan.

“No, that’s not-” he groaned. “Why are you like this?” Steve asked despairingly, looking at you as though you alone caused all of his problems. To be fair, you definitely caused at least half of them.

...

Maybe two-thirds.

“I’ve got it!” you said loudly and suddenly enough for both Steve and Wanda to jump in surprise. “Steve! What did you and Bucky do for Christmas in the 40′s?” you asked, turning your excited attention on him.

Steve had been looking at you apprehensively, but his face softened a bit at your question. “After my ma died I spent Christmas at his place. Christmas wasn’t as… grand as it is nowadays,” he said, grimacing slightly. You knew he resented the increasingly-corporate holiday that Christmas had become. “It was a quiet Christmas Eve dinner together with his family and then camping out in his room for the night. His parents were nice enough to get me a gift for Christmas every year and we’d open presents in the living room, then have a nice breakfast together,” Steve said, thoughts 80 years away.

You could imagine that; A young Bucky, who had just hit puberty and was beginning to fill out, and a still-scraggly asthmatic Steve sitting together at the dining room table, the Barnes family treating Steve like a second son. You could see the wide-eyed boys excitedly opening their presents and Bucky’s younger sister, Rebecca (who you’d seen in a few pictures), playing with her new doll.

“I have an idea!” you said excitedly, slightly manic grin lining your features.

A chorus of Oh no’s rang out in the room and you frowned at all of them.

“You have a choice. Either you help me, or you leave me unsupervised to do whatever I want,” you said, turning your sickly sweet smile on each of them.

Steve gulped, eyes widening in horror. Even Wanda looked a bit alarmed; she knew how much trouble you could get yourself into.

Vision seemed to be thinking. “If we leave her unsupervised for twenty-four hours in her current state of mind, the likelihood of the base being burned down before sunrise tomorrow is 91.64%,” he stated.

“Can’t we just lock her up?” Steve asked.

You looked at him, shocked, hand over your chest, betrayal clear on your face.

“At present, Mister Stark’s fireproofing cannot hold out against the highest temperature at which Miss (Y/L/N) can burn. She could escape if she so wished,” Vision said solemnly.

“Can you knock her out for a few hours?” Steve asked, turning to Wanda.

You gasped at Steve, legitimately offended now.

Wanda snorted. “I can, yes, but I won’t. Christmas is her favorite holiday and I won’t be the one to take that away from her. Besides, I wouldn’t use my powers on my best friend, anyway,” she said, shrugging.

You beamed at her, holding your fist out for a fist bump, which she gave enthusiastically, both of you making explosion noises and wiggling your fingers as you pulled your hands away.

Steve sighed, recognizing defeat.

“Alright, what’s this plan?” he asked, sounding less than thrilled at the thought of whatever you were about to say.

You grinned widely, standing up from the couch, and turned to face the three of them, placing your hands firmly on your hips.

“Well, to start-!”

Your plan ended up being a bunch of mini plans rolled into one. You figured that at least one of the things on your list would make him happy.

You knocked on Bucky’s door, practically bouncing up and down on the balls of your feet.

His grumpy voice could be heard through the door a half second later. “Go away, Steve. I already told you-”

“It’s me, Bucky!” you said, cutting across what was likely a well-rehearsed speech.

There was a pause where you could hear him shuffling behind the door before it opened a half second later.

It was only open a few inches but you could see Bucky studying you warily.

“Is Steve out there?” he asked, glancing as far down the hallway as he could in either direction.

“Nope! Just me,” you said, voice downright chipper.

At that, Bucky opened the door the rest of the way. His room was bathed in darkness, making you frown for a second before you plastered a smile back on your face.

“So I know it might not be your thing, but I wanted to make Christmas cookies. It’s a little last minute, I know, but the urge was just overwhelming all of a sudden. I’ve never made cookies before so I was hoping you might help me out, even if it’s just as an extra set of hands because I know I’ll probably end up messing them up or something and I really wanted to have a nice treat for-”

Bucky held up a hand, effectively cutting off your rambling.

You gulped, suddenly nervous. You wouldn’t admit it to anybody, but you had a huge crush on Bucky. You had a feeling Wanda knew, but she hadn’t said anything yet. Although you were prone to rambling, it always seemed worse when you were around Bucky.

He crossed his arms as he studied you and you put on the most doe-eyed, hopeful expression you could muster.

He stared at you for a full ten seconds before he spoke again. “Fine,” he said grumpily before unceremoniously slamming the door in your face.

You stared at the door, confused. It sounded like he’d agreed, but... why did he close his door in your face? Maybe his words had been a ruse to appease you? Confuse you into shutting up? If that was the case, it was working. When he didn’t immediately reappear, you started pacing in front of his door, trying to think of a new plan of attack. You could always-

“What are you doing?” he asked from his doorway, eyeing you with confusion.

You yelped, jumping at the sound of his voice. You hadn’t heard the door open or seen him standing there.

Stupid super-spy-assassin sneaking skills.

You looked him up and down and realized what he’d been doing: getting changed. He wore a cozy-looking maroon sweater and a pair of thick black sweat pants. You had to stop yourself from giggling at the thick pair of dark grey toe socks on his feet.

“Waiting for you,” you said, beaming up at him. “Ready to make some cookies?” you asked jovially, jerking your thumb over your shoulder in the direction of the kitchen.

He shrugged noncommittally and avoided your gaze.

“I’ll take that as a yes!” you said excitedly as you grabbed his hand and dragged him towards the kitchen where Steve, Vision, and Wanda were gathering ingredients from the expansive pantry.

The five of you were chatting idly at the dining room table, cleaning up the giant mess that had been the cookie-making party. The kitchen was big enough that you’d been able to put all of your creations in at once, meaning you’d have plenty of time to decorate them.

“What’s that smell?” Bucky asked, sniffing the air, a look of concern on his face.

You sniffed the air, too, and your face fell in horror. “Oh no,” you muttered, dropping the dough-caked bowl and spoons you’d been carrying as you ran to the kitchen. They clattered to the floor, utensils and bits of cookie dough flying every direction.

The ovens were belching out smoke and you hurriedly shut them off, muttering a string of expletives under your breath. The others peeked in cautiously (probably in the fear that you were setting everything on fire, judging from the apprehension on their faces).

You yanked the trays out of the oven without bothering to put on oven mitts (the heat didn’t effect you and they just got in the way, anyway) and placed them on the kitchen counter before slamming the oven doors shut again. You stared down at the trays in wide-eyed despair.

The cookies all of you had just made were blackened and barely recognizable from the fun Christmas-themed shapes they’d been when you’d put them in the ovens.

“What temperature did you set the ovens to?” Wanda asked cautiously, moving to stand next to you with her shirt over her nose.

“I thought I set it to 350, but-”

“The ovens were set to 530 on broil, Miss Maximoff,” FRIDAY helpfully supplied.

You groaned and buried your face in your hands. “I’m so sorry. I just pressed the buttons and didn’t bother double checking-”

“It’s alright, (Y/N). Accidents happen,” Steve said, smiling kindly at you.

“We have time! We can make another batch-”

“It will take a few hours to clean the ovens of the smokey smell. Using them before this process is over is not recommended,” FRIDAY informed you.

You groaned as you sank to the floor in defeat. Wanda picked through the cookies carefully, looking for any that might be worth saving, but seemed to deem them all ultimately unsalvageable and dumped them into the trash one tray after the other.

Hell, this hadn’t worked. Which meant it was time for Plan B.

Dangnabit, let’s try Plan B! (Next Chapter)

This series is finished, but if you want to be tagged in my other fics, check out  this post! Sorry, but responses to this post asking to be tagged will be ignored, so send me an ask or like one of the taglist posts!

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