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full on feel like pjo tv s2 is not gonna hold up so they need to drag as much attention to the series as they can by using nico as a sock puppet w tsats2
im fully expecting the show to go the way of the movies. it doesnt help Sea of Monsters is almost unanimously the least favorite book of the first series. People frequently forget it even exists or what happens in it, especially more casual fans.
Heck, just look at how little fanfare the second season has gotten so far as compared to the build up to s1. I wouldn't be surprised if s2 totally flops. It would be a little funny.
#pjo#riordanverse#pjo tv#pjo tv crit#tsats 2#Anonymous#ask#im still sad theyre beating every dead horse in the franchise they can EXCEPT for the graphic novels#the poor graphic novels arent getting advertised AT ALL and the BoO one got cancelled#like. the graphic novels would actually be probably one of the best advertising avenues!#like. hey! you dont need to write a whole new book! just remind people of previous books and give them a way to refresh on it#and given how the first couple of graphic novels were a different artists i could totally see them doing a second version#just to make them all consistent. thatd make sense and be reasonable.#the show has also already kind of trapped itself in a corner in a couple of ways#for one they kind of screwed themselves over failing to plan for the actors. yknow. ageing.#Walker is already taller than like. most of the cast. Percy's gonna be TOWERING over Luke by TLO#i think the main trio is all like almost 16 already? and we're only on s2. its gonna be rough. they didnt think about it. they didnt plan.#also with how theyve been messing with plot and characterization theyre VERY quickly going to start running into hurdles#because they dont seem to understand the more you change earlier on. the less the later stuff will work without also needing change#because. it's dependent on what comes before. so we will very quickly be requiring either MASSIVE canon divergence or a lot of retcon#and retcon in the show is going to be VERY OBVIOUS#though i stand by itll be so funny if they solve too much too quickly in s2 just like the movies and it just ends on#''wait. crap. what are we going to do for s3 now. we solved too much too early. they have nothing to do''
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I'm not actually sure i'm a big fan of the decline/nixing of 00 IDs tbh, i think thats gonna have the opposite result of getting kjh that sweet sweet Anime Money unless he intends to implement a 0000 rarity or something, because otherwise people are probs gonna only shard for the sinners theyre attached to/ids that are GOOD rather than pull on banners. A 000 ID that performs like a 00 ID isn't gonna fly well if it starts happeninng more and more. but what do i know. i love my 00s so maybe i just want to have low rarity silly fellas
i also don't like the idea of older IDs falling into obscurity but its mostly bc im very very attached to my first IDs and dont wanna have to stop using them just bc rheir number output isnt crazy like modern IDs are. I feel like this could be fixed by rolling out an uptie V but on a per-season basis (for example, during hong lu's canto we get the ability to uptie V IDs and egos but only from season 1, so on so forth etc etc). I know the power creep IS a lore thing, but. surely this would be an easier option than implementing skins? Not that I dont like the idea of skins though, they're DEFINITELY a really fun idea 🤔
#im obvs supreme anti-limbus engaging in common gacha practices#bc i would have to stop playing if it became too gacha-like. i cannot do gachas. HOWEVER#im not gonna bitch too much just bc im curious to see if this works out at all#i do wonder if making one 000 takes less resources?#i feel like uptie V but slower and limited rollout is less resource-intensive than the skin mechanic that was showcases#just sm thoughts while i grind out the last of my path of stars. ive done 10 mirror dungeons today and have like 15 more to do.#i do think the complaints about having to wait one week to shard is silly. i already do that. unless its for a sinner or sinner ID im#enamored with (like dulcinea rodya or wh heath)#the problem is gonna be managing that while also havjng to futz with egos...bc theyre expensive to shard for...#BUT. what do i know
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messy doodles plus with some picked ramblings with them as i process, learn, and progress. yes only some out of many. i talk far too much. i missed so much too im just too tired to talk abt those aspects rifht now
#library of ruina#lobotomy corporation#lobotomy corp spoilers#technically i talk abt them less of draw them#just incase though#hod#hod lor#yesod#technically both lobcorp and lor uhh i think ill just do one tag for all since theyre sketchy doodles#malkuth#netzach#there was another for fragment of the universe. fragments ego gear talking abt ignoring it and dimissing it and what it attempts to#communicate and speak. netzach commonly speaking in l corp and then adding some parts long the lines of yeah just keep ignoring me or the#sort along with commonly being dismissed as just a 'druggie' or another along those words. late and cant get exact quotes but relatively#that. there is rambles for yesod too but... ahhhhhh i talk far FAR too much. essentally ive talked abt every piece of dialog and keter floo#as well. its ah. it sure is... a floor! oh dear.....#just got to warp train <3 only that for urban legend iirc it was called. got too tired after progessing#when i say more work than needed w hod its to where her instructions on how to suppress and deal w a breaching abno is noted in the safet#teams description to be their job kinda. training is explicitly only noted to get employees adjusted to their new departments and to enforce#slash teach policies and Management procedures. which isnt really suppressions of individual abnos that she was showing in story 5 of her#l corp dialog. that and in abno stories its listed there is already a therapy program that people go do after certain requirments as company#enforced procedure which is when they panic and attack another iirc. which means the COMPULSORY counseling was a whole seprate thing hod#created. thats what i mean by more work than needed. not quite sure what informatiok holds up vut its what i gleaned from l corp
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I was writing tags but I think it deserves main post.
Something I know multiple people to do is get a pet so that you have a life relying on you. You cant do it today because who will feed the cat tomorrow?
And as a bonus, looking after an animal really helps you have compassion and look after yourself. Ive experienced this personally*.
Animals, especially cuddly ones are also super therapeutic. Just holding or touching a warm living creature is really powerful, especially but not exclusively if youre lonely or touch starved. Its comforting. You feel less alone. Theyre affectionate towards you, and that makes you think there must be something about you worth loving because theres a cat climbing on you and purring. It doesnt know about human troubles and self esteem and reputation and work. It knows you are person. You feed it. It sees you every day. It loves you. Youre lovable. Youre worthy of love. This weird creature says so.
This isnt necessarily the right advice for everyone so do think about it; eg dont get a dog if you cant consistently leave the house to walk them. Cats do better indoors, and they need more than just food water and litter change. Brushing, love, play, vet visits etc. I dont know anout keeping fish but that might be easier. You could also try a plant. Its surprising how effecting it is to have a living being with you, even if its just a tiny succulent in a pot that doesnt ever move. Its still alive and thats powerful. If youre keeping it alive thats also an incredible feeling. One time when I was living alone and isolating myself, a friend left me a little succulent at the door when I said I wasnt up for actually interacting. And it made a really significant difference which was so surprising to me, its so small! But its *alive*.
*I once had a psych ask if Id ever had a pet, I said no, he said ok so try imagine. The same way you love a pet unconditionally no matter what it does, try feel that way about yourself. I did not viscerally understand what he meant till I got a cat, who could be a mischievous stinky slippery little shit, and I loved him with all my heart no matter how upset I also was at him. This wasnt something I had experienced before.
Another time Id moved somewhere new and I was talking to my cat about how it must be scary for him, in a new place with new sights and sounds and smells. And then I realised, hey, *Im* in a new place with new sights and sounds AND smells, and its ok if I feel a bit wobbly about it. We can be a bit wobbly and comfort each other together.
Seriously, having a Little Guy follow you around and love you is the best. Pet ownership is one of my best life decisions.
So there is a lot of bad stuff going on right now, and I'm sure there are lots of people feeling hopeless and thinking of suicide. Well, I've been suicidal for 21 years and I have a few practical pieces of advice for surviving that I rarely see in other places but I think have done more to keep me off the ledge than almost anything.
1. Don't feel guilty for wanting to kill yourself. Life can be extremely painful, and you are not weak, a coward, or irrational for considering the obvious way to alleviate that pain. Guilt on top of the rest of your pain will not help, and you are not a bad person. You are going to have to tell yourself this a lot.
2. If you think you might do it, find an excuse to live. This is different from a reason to live in that it is short term and shallow. For years my excuse was that I still had enough money to buy a pizza and I'd be damned if I didn't get my last pizza before I died, and if i still wanted to kill myself after the pizza then I had lost nothing. I swear this kept me alive through some of the hardest years of my life.
3. If you have an online friend you can trust, ask if they would be willing to do check in duty occasionally on your worst nights. It's very simple, on bad days where hurting yourself is a real possibility, ask your friend if they can send you a message at regular intervals, say 15 or 20 minutes, confirming that you are safe. It can be as simple as "check?", with you responding "I'm ok". Being immediately held accountable makes not doing it so much easier. I asked a friend to help me like this about two weeks ago to deal with a really bad self harm day and the difference between trying to do it on your own and simple check ins is astounding. It hurts so much less.
4. You die with nothing left on the table. This is for when it's over and you are going to kill yourself. You have a plan, you are ready, and you want to. At this point you are effectively dead. Which means there are no consequences. You can finally do the thing that you were always too scared to do. Maybe it's quitting your job, or confessing to your crush. For me it was coming out as trans. This is your last ditch effort, so if it blows up in your face and ruins everything it is no loss because your plan will still work tomorrow. You were already dead anyway, who cares if you left behind a bit more chaos.
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im having an absolute unadulterated blast with the Ethersea prologue for many many reasons, it's beautiful and exceeds all my expectations.. but also. there's many moments here that genuinely make me go "oh god damn, these people are Americans." the Quiet Year system is a profoundly fascinating and revealing game - nothing tells you quite as much about how somebody sees the world than asking them to imagine a new one.
#customizable 'single family housing' the immediate adoption of a liberal economic system hierarchical gvt structures... and fish#especially when the whole set up is such a clear metaphor for climate change as the consequence of industrialization!#'single family housing' just rocked me so hard. that in the middle of an apocalypse we'd use resources towards that kind of individualism#and then they *do* kind of brush against that! with the idea of Community going down because of the inability to connect with neighbours!#the adventure zone#taz ethersea#mine#edit also not to understate that i do find the critique and allegory that is present to be really nice and genuinely exciting#the ending of prologue v goes SO HARD i was out of breath from the excited stimming#and i think my difficulty reading tone made me miss that the 'entrepeneur' thing was a joke? like theres still some#interesting biases at work here but maybe there's more insight than i gave it credit for. im curious about how ol' joshie's bs will develop#autistic anarchocommie netwon moments#also i wish theyd be less anxious about the brinear as a DID allegory i think it could be so interestinggg#we'll see. im really loving this show so far. taz has such a very special direct connection to my heart#i really like what theyre doing with this stuff even if sometimes i wish theyd do a lot more#the ending monologue of prologue v basically encapsulates most of the things about this that i find exciting and cool#i hope the transition to dnd will still allow them to bloom
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with my phantom hourglass replay, there are two things i noticed;
a possible theme you could glean from the game is action vs inaction, and i think it's especially prevalent before you even leave mercay the first time, with oshus frequently urging link to not go after the ghost ship, then to just wait until the broken bridge is fixed, and seems reluctant at every turn while link and ciela are more than eager to go and do something about this problem, and the people of mercay in general talking about things and their problems but never seeming to act on their fears or desires, as well as the mention that due to the ghost ship, very very few people are still sailing around, while linebeck is one of the only people we see in the game actively going after the ghost ship and still sailing around. i might make a longer post just talking more about the action vs inaction in phantom hourglass but i just noticed it a bit and thought it was a bit of an interesting sort of theme you could find in the game.
linebeck moves so fucking much. i think he moves more than any npc in the rest of the game. not just in his intro cutscene where he is very animated, just in how much he moves when just standing in his little idle post, it's damn near distracting when the camera is focused on him, he moves a lot. i don't think i've really acknowledged how much he moves, and it really gives the impression that he's antsy or eager to get going, both of which fit him pretty well with how he acts.
#phantom hourglass#linebeck#loz#legend of zelda#salty talks#imo the action vs inaction thing feels esp interesting to me when looking at oshus specifically. he and his world are in grave danger#and he knows it and he actively does nothing and even seems reluctant to let ciela and link go ahead and do something.#of course he comes around on it but it's very interesting. has he given up at that point? thats what it suggests to me#that hes like. joined the people of mercay in just lying down and waiting for other people to fix their problems or just. not do anything#otherwise on mercay you have that old guy in the bar who spends the whole game not leaving bc he doesnt want to face his wife#and she never goes to the bar to actually look for him and just talks about it if anything#the guy with the blue tunic talks a lot about linebeck and his ship and almost gives the impression that he really wants to talk to him#but yknow. doesnt. theres the women that tells you about docks being shut down and how linebeck is the only person who's showed up#the woman you see at the broken bridge who's just like oh well! time to wait til someone fixes it.#even the guy fixing the bridge iirc is like well fuck i gotta do it or else oshus is going to bitch at me abt it#everyone seems reluctant to act which makes for an interesting way in how our main crew stands out#it is less so oh theyve been chosen specifically for this its moreso they're the ones who are fucking doing something about this#for their own various reasons some of which are more selfish but theyre still doing something#will likely have more stuff to say when im done but ofc we have other characters in the game who have to do with this#anyways. linebeck is so animated all of the fucking time it's great i dont think theres any other character that moves as much as him#when he's just standing around to talking to link it's great. he's so ready to get going.#it works with him being an anxious mess and also with like. oh he's probably understimulated. you know he's got a nasty case of wanderlust#i can put it with the idea that he's understimulated and afraid to stim in public so he's just constantly moving#he probably drums his fingers on tables bounces his leg when sitting paces around switches the way he sits or lays down often#tbh this kinda fits in with him being one of the main characters who takes action moreso than a lot of other characters#his arc culminates in him taking action he's going after the ghost ship he's moving around the world the only issue is that one of the#actions he takes is running away from his problems literally n metaphorically (tho idk if facing the jolene problem is a good idea for him)
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.........im just gonna be real i do not see kabu misu. like period...... like dont get me wrong theyhave a good dynamic but it was NOT mithrun in the middle of his conspiracy board
#i saw someone refer to labru as wanting to see kabru get worse and i feel so violent#yeah you know i think being a caretaker of sorts(situation where you may have to ignore your wants and needs) is soooo much healthier for#kabru than being with a peer who would help him unmask and reduce his monster anxiety with knowledge#not to say that relationships or fictional shipping is all about what makes characters better#i just find the labru dynamic infinitely more interesting than kabumisu#to me kabumisu is very boring. like okay yay prettyboy helps you get in touch with your desires and learns to take care of himself better#along the way like. cool! glad theyre friends!#labru though.... the drama... the autism....i think labru would be a lot about kabru working thru#his mask and laios learning not to box humans up as More Difficult/less desirable creatures than monsters/animals#like uhh actually i think itd be good for kabru to talk to someone who is not on the page kabru assumes hes on#and urrrmmm itd be good for laios to Finally have a friend who is Actually interested in Him. who is interested in humans so much that#laios might actually get a sufficient explanation for missed social cues and conventions#im just saying labru works because they are on the same level. my favorite panels are when people call kabru creepy
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i love my friends so much. i feel like yesterday i had a lot of shit going on in my head and i woke up to my friend explaining things in a way that put my mind at ease. i dont feel as anxious anymore because i know i was overthinking. i think my dad said it best when he told me that he thought my wonderful brain of mine just wants to think problems are bigger than they actually are. he is right! im just inexperienced in life and half of the time im scared im doing something wrong but- HEY. i need to be more confident in making mistakes. making mistakes doesn't define me as a person!! i need to stop worrying about doing life right and just live for the sake of living and doing what makes me happy!!!!!!!
#thank u blake. u really helped#also nessa!! thank u for that reblog about your perspective on my one post about feeling lost career wise#it helps me to know im not the only one living this life because holy fuck i can feel confused sometimes because.. am i doing this right?#and you know what? theres no correct path that i think there is but im just not good without a direct direction. it makes me a little#anxious about things#i dont know if its because i have some form of a disorder but i function better when i plan stuff out and give myself something to#decompress the problems and thoughts because in my brain theyre just all stuck and clumped together#and that can get a bit scary and overwhelming!!!#im just glad i have people that care about me. it means literally everything to me#so even if i dont 100% reply dont think i dont care because literally any ANY advice or kindness you show to me means the world#we're all just living this little life and we might as well make the best of it#people care..... thats just.... its good... it makes me feel less alone that people do#i love my friends so much#evennnn if we dont talk every day or are only mutuals in passing!!! it literally means a lot if people show me kindness#like holy shit!!! your older than me? and your dealing with a similar experience??? and your telling me that its okay??? and that itll be#okay?????#like#just the reassurance that things will be okay and work out and that im not the only one dealing with a feeling like mine#idk sometimes i just feel like im crazy and like my thoughts make no sense?? you know?? but yall get it#im glad that i have people who are older than me in my life cause yall have experienced stuff that i can use to be better#like your life experiences can help me in a way that can make a difference on my perspective on things#its why i like talking to my coworkers. because theyve seen things and done things i havent and their perspective can teach me potentially#i just dont feel so overwhelmed with life when i talk to people who understand#i feel so young and yet old enough to know but even the people who are older dont know so im sort of on the right track i suppose depending#on how you look at it#so- im just gonna live my life and smile because!!! you gotta.#you gotta surround yourself with people who can enrich you and teach you things for the better and make you want to grow#some of you are like that#you may not know that#but that kindness means so much
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I crave for toxic diakko. Unfortunately I have classes tomorrow
#back to collegeeeeee i hate ittttttt#what if. diana is lowkey comp-het and is engaged to andrew for publicity reasons.#cuz shes an aristocrat and all#but shes smitten as fuck at akko#and akko doesnt know that diana is a bigshot public figure whose relationships are highly monitored#diana leads akko on in secret while she and andrew get along in public. but in reality theyre both only like#lesbian-gay solidatory who at best tolerate each other#diana really only warms up to akko for more or less lusty reasons rather than romantic ones#akko doesnt realize this and thought they were really going somewhere#she keeps on thinking 'aw shes so sweet she keeps on calling me and asking me to come over but she doesnt introduce me to anyone tho'#diana actually keeps her as a dirty secret and treats ger like that and diana sorta planned that this wont last long#uh oh it went longer tan it should and now akko is like a drug she cant live without now#diana's engagement w andrew gets nearer and nearer and instead of breaking it off with akko#shes thinking of ways to get her to working for ger so that she'll stay and near her grasp because she cant and wont let go#akko doesnt know what the fuck kinda situation shes in but amanda who sorta knows diana immediately gets vibe of their situationship#and brings akko to a party where diana and andrew's engagement is shown off#and akko finally learns how diana was basically using her as a side piece and leaves in tears
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i genuinely need to be put down like a dog i cant do this anymore man holy shit
#yall dont know the meaning of terminally online til u meet me#i hate myself so much its not even funny i am the most miserable worthless scum#my sleep schedule is 7am to 3pm all i do all day is rot on the couch and sometimes draw if i have a drop of motivation#depression is completely kicking my ass and im not even fighting back i give up what the fuck man#theres not even a point for me to keep trying i just want to stop feeling such deep despair 24/7 please#i dont want to die i just want the pain to stop so i can peacefullylive out the rest of this year before i turn 18 and its all over for good#but i cant even have that! im just gonna suffer the whole time thanks great#i wish i could just get better and fix all of this but i cant its not working we dont have the money to#actually get me the help i need to make it work. i just have to figure it out or die#i just wanna go back to ***** ** *** i just want to stop being lonely and useless#i dont know why im posting this shit to tumblr. its so stupid i should just be journaling or something#probably because im worthless selfish scum. idfk.#the last 6 months have been a complete blur. just rotting on the couch or in bed occasionally seeing friends once every other month or so#ive already wasted half of being 17 abd im probably gonna waste the rest too. ill do nothing of worth before i die.#even my art is ugly and horrible and not worth leaving behind. people tell me to work to improve it but i dont have the time left#ill never create any of the things i wanted to create ill never be a good artist im just going to die exactly like this#an absolutely terrible person.#the only people i can talk about the things that make me a terrible person with are people who are terrible in even worse ways#no one can comfort me except them because theyre the only people who know what ive done and actually do see it as less than absolute evil#because they know absolute evil because it is them. but i actually don’t believe that i think theyre bad but could be good#idk what im saying anymore#someone shoot me#please im not kidding#just make it stop#tw vent#tw sui#delete later
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random piece of information that i gotta put here before i forget bc i spent so long figuring this out from the courses to speciality to acceptance criteria physically and academically and so much so
- li siyue is studying in ���海.戏剧学院 - 表演（戏曲音乐表演-民族器乐）or to be short, the shanghai thea.tre a.cademy, majoring in performance in opera music instruments (folks music) aka she's focusing on pipa (bc her fc plays pipa and i just can't let that go to waste) which is so interesting for me to explore bc girlie writes pop music but she's studying folk music instruments pls
- xia zhiyun is studying in the same university as li yao which is the cen.tral academy of china (中央.戏剧学院 - 表演系＆导演系), double majoring in acting and directing
#i just think theyre neat bc these are super hard to get into bc like less than 30 students get admitted/accepted each year#anyway these kids are good at what they do so skfkkg#time to figure out where do the rest of the kids who are normal like us attend unis#ooc: i'm a walking fortune cookie#about / li siyue#about / xia zhiyun#HAVING BRAINROT#the last time i had brainrot like this was finding out how the emergency response team works in south korea with their shifts and salary etc
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looking at some takes on characters or relationships or scenes in which things happen between them and just thinking,
How in the hell are people interpreting it this way??? But then i step back and realize that the story or character in question is fundamentally and extraordinarily different from the average person's life experience and I go,
ah,
you guys just... don't have a deep enough understanding of trauma responses...
#mine#vagueblogging again i guess but this applies to many things#its honestly okay that the general public doesn't grasp the deeper layers at play because tbh theyre not often explored in media#to that degree at least#ive known someone with deep. Deep. DEEP traumas#shit that no human should ever go through and sounds almost cartoonishly evil#and the truth is#healing from that is UGLY. the impact it has on how a person interacts with their life is unimaginable#and it often makes NO SENSE AT ALL to someone who hasn't experienced the same shit#it's not as simple as 'i'm sad or scared and i cry easily but if youre nice to me and love me it'll go away'#in my own experience of loving someone like that#you sometimes have to work at helping them rewrite their entire philosophies.#things you wouldnt even think of#sometimes expressing sadness or pain is the hardest part about it because they're so used to turning the other cheek to survive#sometimes theyre so used to being manipulated that they reject any kindness you offer in the most viscerally violent way#and it hurts!#communication is HARD!#receiving love is HARD!#i was listening to Raon Lee's cover of Kokoronashi#and thinking about how raw the emotions are in the lyrics#and how so many average joes out there wouldn't be able to make any sense of it but those who do get it really get it#(essentially like... 'i wish you would just get it overwith and tear me apart#bc it would hurt less than the confusion i feel at how you're kind to me and holding me and promising to never let go...#at least i know how to handle the pain of dying#this is so confusing and frightening what youre doing to me. i hate it i hate it but please... don't leave me alone')#(its such a gorgeous song)#sHIT AND THEN 2 SECONDS LATER I FIND KOHANA LAM'S COVER OF IT AND IT'S SO MUCH MOR E#for the love of god look up that song and turn on lyrics captions
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I am sorry you've been harrassed by terfs, but the way you are currently trying to weed them out seems a bit misguided. As in, the vast majority of terfs are in fact ok with big hairy CIS men. The so-called men they are actively hating are trans women/transfem people. So by acting like you proclaiming your love to big hairy dudes is the best terf-repellant you seem to be missing the point at best.
i'd love to actually respond to your concerns or whatever the hell it was that you were trying to convey with this ask, but it has almost no basis in reality so i literally cant.
thats the one statement on how effective i think the banners are that has left my queue so far. which is: i hope it works but also have literally 2 other backup plans already in case it does not. i dont know why youre calling that "acting like [me] proclaiming [my] love to big hairy dudes is the best terf-repellant", because thats wildly off target from what i have actually said at any point. everything else youve said is also pretty much either dead wrong or ignorant, so im getting the feeling that you not reading has been a problem for a while.
(ive also not mentioned terfs this entire time--ive been talking about radfems and using the word radfems. they're not the same thing although there's large overlap. so like. thats strike two for zero reading comprehension, buddy. cause you are literally not talking about the group im talking about and youre also inventing whole new sentences that i didnt say.)
#obviously reading ability does not equal intelligence. more about the wild overconfidence of someone who didnt bother to check if they#even read a statement correctly#i misread things all the time which is why i also dont barge into strangers inboxes to insult THEIR intelligence#because i know theres always a chance im completely wrong and i dont want to be an asshole#anon you could give that a try#like what am i even supposed to say to this ? i dont think its the best terf repellant and have never said that ?#but if you know so much about them go ahead and tell us your suggestions for how to get rid of them#im skeptical that they will make any sense at all but im always open to new ideas#(feels nice to be condescended to doesnt it ? i assume thats why you were condescending to me so im returning the favor <3)#anyway other than this fool thank you all for the supportive asks im glad youre enjoying the banners ! so am i :D#way too soon to tell if theyre working (no radfems yet but i usually get a wave of them every couple months so i wont jump to conclusions)#but just as blog decor theyre already great#there are many many asks though and i dont enjoy when this blog is less fiber craft than other stuff#so im reading each one and appreciating them but please dont be upset that im not responding to them or posting them#i have the first 2 i got in my queue and then i got like 20 more so
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Doodle I did of my girl Juliet earlier
#keese draws#lobotomy corporation#oc art#not super happy with this but I do enjoy looking at her so I can lower my standards for her#at least I feel like I have a better idea of her general shapes now#I spent hours and hours today on the lob corp grind and I think Im Finally ready to actually move forward with they story#Ive also been thinking abt my nuggets during their lor eras and thats been fun#in particular its been fun to think abt my ogs because half of them are experiencing their crash from finally being free from lob corp hell#and the other half are like frolicking in fields and making friendship bracelets and have made peace with their past and upcoming futures#and that half is the half that are all just godawful people who do not deserve that peace and happiness while the people they actively#traumatized are just left to deal with it#this is mostly abt juliet and loki they both suck I love them sm <3#juliet is the one thats caused more active harm tho since shes that type of boss that will obsess over those she thinks have ~potential~#and once youve caught her attention you are guaranteed to have a horrible time as she will get what she wants out of you no matter what#she doesn't even work on abnormalities anymore just just breaths down ppls necks and fights when need be#loki is very similar in that regard he puts a lot of pressure on his team to provide the results he wants#hes less likely to like. directly psychologically torture those who are under him. but he still isnt a good boss.#hes also more openly rude and disrespectful towards those around him because while neither respect anyone but eachother#loki much more frequently openly states that fact to ppls faces because he feels like everyone around him is wasting his time#now loki actually does legitimately like a few other ppl he works with which is smth that cant rly be said for juliet#but hes also the one whos always on team 'lets murder the newbies for science' so y'know#ding is like his least favorite person here and its like 30% because he specifically accepted her into the info department because he#planned on getting her killed to finish off some research on a tool abno that was being worked on#but she survived the process so now she just like actually works here and he despises her despite the fact that shes rly good at her job#juliet doesn't usually send ger guys to die on purpose but if they do die she doesn't care#she simply feels that if they die early they were weak links anyways#she will still be 'nice' to newbies and to all of her coworkers for that matter but she still has quite the bad reputation regardless#some newbies do fall for her polite act but anyone whos been here for more than like a few days knows that she doesn't give a shit abt them#theyre both doing fine in lor theyre just like we may have lost everything but at least we have eachother :) (mason wants to strangle them)
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"You look like you lost weight! You look great!"
😭 I just put a tighter shirt on dawg
#WHY DO PEOPLE FEEL THE NEED TO ALWAYS COMMENT ON MY WEIGHT#OR APPEARANCE IN GENERAL#like shut up idc#oMg KeEp DoInG wHaT uR dOiNg To LoSe WeIgHt#i forgot to eat all day bro#i have unhealthy coping mechanisms bro#LIKE U DONT KNOW IF THE WEIGHT IM AT IS GOOD FOR ME ALL ANYONE WANTS ME TO DO IS LOSE WEIGHT#BITCH I LIKE MY BODY MOST DAYS#YES I PLAN ON LOSING WEIGHT BUT YOU MAKE IT SOUND BAD THAT I HAVE MEAT ON MY BONES#IVE SEEN THE WAY YOU EAT AND ITS WORSE THAN ME#BLAH BLAH BLAH I LOVE ME SOME CHUB#iDC IF U THINK ID BE PRETTIER WITH LESS WEIGHT#ILL STAY BIG CUZ I WANT TO BE#IM HEALTHY IM THRIVING UR JUST ADDING TO PEOPLE NEGATIVE SELFIMAGE#LETS TALK ABT HOW U EAT ONE DAINTY MEAL AND A FRUIT SLICE#like...dont comment on other ppls body UNLESS YOU KNOW THEYRE OK WITH IT#like my sister and i if we r actively tryna lose some weight or gain muscle we will comment on it#like oh have u been working out? or omg did you lose weight?#bc ik shes ok with us talking abt it that way and vice versa
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me: i don’t wanna be a cog in the capitalist machine!! my job doesn’t care about me and i literally don’t get paid enough to care about it!!
the part of me relentlessly scrutinized for being the family fuckup: but,,,,when i do good job customers like me,,,,when i do extra managers think i’m the best,,,,
#bird noises#work sucks in a lot of ways#it’s just food service nothing special and it will destroy my body eventually#but also it is genuinely better for my mental health to just. get positive feedback and interact with people in a nice way#i havent really had any terrible customers yet. the occasional grumpy or kinda rude one but nothing i cant shake off in a second#that probably helps#its funny bc my parents notice the difference and its like GEE I WONDER HOW ELSE THIS COULD HAVE OCCURRED#PERHAPS IF THE HUMANS I LIVE WITH WERE ALSO NICE TO ME#but alas……#anyway thinking about this bc i accidentally volunteered myself to do two people’s closing tasks and that sucked#but my manager said im amazing soooooooooo maybe it was worth it#i’m gonna fight whoever’s in charge of their advertising tho for saying they have a ‘competitive wage’#which is $3-4 less than the nearby ‘good’ places money-wise AND ALSO. exactly the same or less than what people were making at this location#THREE YEARS AGO#which i know because i worked here. making $2.50 less. but i talked to the new hires and found out they made a good chunk more#we do get tips which is like an extra $1-1.50 so thats nice but its not competitive my friend#its barely acceptable#theyre lucky no one else would hire me#also pisses me off bc their main website advertises their starting wages as ACTUALLY competitive but c’est la vie#i’m in a weird situation where i need to Be Employed more than i need money per se so i’m fine with it for now#wren stop talking about panera challenge
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