#'what if I haven't cleaned this Enough and they die'

[newkatzkafe2023]

@lara-legomonkiekid

(Genderbend) What if Y/N's being harassed by a bunch of demons? But Y/N doesn't want to worry his wife about it?

You wife's enemies are your enemies as well but to think their dumb enough to mess with you😑

(Lmk Wukong) Ohhhhhhhhhh no your wife maybe be a bit of an air head, but she's more observant than she lets on. She can feel that their is something you're keeping from her, and she's gonna find out what, so she followed you to your outing, and she was quick to find the truth. You were currently fighting these demon thugs who have been messing with you for a good few weeks at best, and the second one of them punched your face. She flew into a murderous rage, and soon you both were surrounded by dead bodies. Now you'll have to deal with your wife's interrogation.

(MKR Wukong) Again,THEY WILL BE A BLOODSTAIN ON THE GRASS WHEN SHE'S DONE WITH THEM!!👿 you felt that you never had to tell your wife about the bullying and harassment. After all, you know how to take care of yourself in battle, but also, these guys were bothering you because they knew that they would die if they messed with her. So when Wukong noticed that you came back with some bruises, she immediately saw red and demanded to know what happened. You sighed and told your wife about your problems with these guys that were bothering you, and well, let's just say there was a large of mystery meat after words.

(HIB Wukong) Hmmm, well, this is very bad for the other people involved. Ever since your wife got her powers back, she became extra protective of everyone in the family, including you. So when she finds that you were being bullied by some low-life demons and you refrain from telling her because she's already stressed out. One day, you came home with a black eye, and Luier immediately freaked out and told Wukong what happened, and now their all dead☠️

(NR Wukong) Ohhhhhhhhhh nooooooooo people constantly forget how crazy dangerous she actually is, like seriously you would find her dragging a dead body every other week!😧😰 so you think people would stay clear of you as much as they do your wife, but we always have that one arrogant moron and one day they got the jump on you and messed up your clothes and face. You never got a chance to tell Wukong about the harassment because apparently she knew already, because when you came home you found her roasting a very familiar demon head and you put two and two together and now you mildly fear her.

(Netflix Wukong) Ohhhhhhhhhh nooo 🙅‍♀️ this is bad, those clowns picked the wrong ones because you're both equally violent. Since you're both Fiercely protective of each other, you're both quick to neutralize each other's enemies and problems. Which is why you were open to tell her that you were assault and injured but fought them all back and told your wife about it, but the second you saw those Wrathful red eyes....well you both about to catch a bunch of bodies. 😈

(BMW Wukong) INSTA KILL ENOUGH SAID!!! Nobody messes with her darling husband and gets away with it. Also I advise that you don't even bother to hide your harassment from her because she gonna find out either way. So when she finds the bastards who dare to lay a fearful claw on your sweet handsome face, she totally went Nuclear she totally ripped their faces off. Even worse then ever, she took full brutal revenge and made them an example to never f*ck with you ever again.

(Destined one) The destined one may be calm and collected out of the monkey woman, but she can be just as lethal when provoked as well. The best way to get on her bad side literally attacks her husband. You knew this which is why you avoid telling her about any of you minor issues not seeing it as a big deal, It was until you received an severe injury there is absolutely no way you can hide from her. You finally came clean to her about the whole assault, and told her not to worry about it, but she just kissed your wounds and left. After all that, you haven't seen those guys ever again, infact Nobody has ever seen them again...........It was like they disappeared of the face of the earth. You wonder what happened?😈

FEEL FREE TO REBLOG

[theladygazingatemptiness]

me @ me: hoe don't kill this fish tryna be Mother Ocean

[asterdeer]

just finished the 2nd coldfire book and gerald tarrant's relationship with dignity is so interesting to me. from jump we have this man whose well-groomed, immaculate appearance damien's narration cannot stop harping on about. tarrant is the picture of dignity: cool, quiet, obsessed with cleanliness. in when true night falls and he almost blows himself up and needs damien to bury him in a hole like a flower bulb just to survive the morning, one of the first things gerald does after emerging is magicking the dirt and blood off his body and hair. it's not a preference at that point, it's a compulsion, it's an emotional necessity.

and yet gerald's approach to immortality renders him so vulnerable in just one very particular way, and in both book 1 and 2 his enemies exploit that vulnerability to such a degree that gerald is rendered little better than a rag doll. it's a one-hit almost-kill kind of vulnerability; he doesn't even have a chance to fight back. and because he is what he is, he can still survive for a long time: burned, disfigured, in agony, weakened, but "alive." in book 1, damien & co find him basically jesus-on-a-cross'd in the middle of blinding light, burned so badly that his body is barely holding together; in book 2, after he gets one-shot, the bad guys strip him almost naked and leave him pinned to the floor to wait for sunrise to finish the job. and he SURVIVES this shit. and, in book 2, in the next scene where he's conscious: put together, calm, imminently in control of himself once again.

it just gets me, this need for some sense of dignity specifically because of his power, or rather its one (1) weakness. he doesn't wear armor, he's ridiculously, stupidly dangerous and powerful, but he's got an achilles heel that can, in a matter of seconds, in the face of power great enough, put him flat on his face and suffering unimaginable pain for possibly days at a time, at the tender mercies of whoever wants him powerless, and so he still needs to project control. not a speck of dirt on his clothes, not a tangle in his hair, not a hitch of emotion in his voice. he's old enough, powerful enough, that he shouldn't need to present himself this way. and yet.

[kyouka-supremacy]

Failed a social interaction 0 injured 1 killed (me)

[luulapants]

Existential despair is so common in a person's twenties, I think, because up until that point, we've had a pretty clear road map for what's expected of us and we haven't had much reason to question that map. There are still a few milestones outlined for us (start a career, get married, make babies) but more and more young people are entering the post-school world and realizing:

A) that career thing just isn't happening like they said it would

B) I'm not ready to get married/I don't want to get married/marriage isn't the sort of life-altering event that it used to be

C) I'm not ready to make babies/I don't want a baby/I can't afford to raise children right now (see point A)

And in the absence of these milestones to shoot for (which one could argue weren't the promise of fulfillment they claimed to be in the first place), what we're left with is this aimless abyss of "the rest of our lives" sprawling out ahead of us with no indication of how it will go or what we should be doing to shape it. Young people start their first jobs, find they hate them, and think to themselves, "Is this it? Am I just supposed to do this job until I'm too old to do it or die first?"

Which is, yeah, really fucking depressing!! So here's my best attempt at an alternate roadmap for young people that don't vibe with the old model. Please feel free to add in your own suggestions!

Learn how you work and what you want out of a job. Unless you've been in a job-specific training program that gives you hands-on experience, your first jobs should be experiments. Learn how a full-time job feels for you, what elements are more or less difficult. Different workplaces have different cultures and expectations - what do you need out of a job environment? Do you need to find fulfillment in your job or is it enough for it to pay the bills and leave you time to find outside fulfillment? Do you want to climb a corporate ladder or are you content to hunker down as long as your bills get paid? This period of experimentation is exhausting and may feel like it's consuming your whole life.

Learn how to make time for things outside of work. Adapting to a full-time work environment often leaves you feeling so drained that you can't do anything but go home and collapse on the couch every day. That's fine - for a little while. But it can also become a habit. You need to learn how to do things after work or you'll go crazy. Go to a trivia night. Start an exercise schedule. Take a class in your community. Find volunteer work. Join a band. You will find that putting more things into your day makes you feel like you have more time, not less.

Find a community. Making friends as an adult can feel impossible. Where do you find these mysterious friends everyone seems to have?? This goes along with #2, though. As you start regularly attending the same activities, you will find that repeat interactions with the same people turn into friendships or at least friendly acquaintances. Say yes to invitations. Get involved in your local community. Strive to be connected enough to bump into people at the grocery store.

Unlearn bad lessons. We all internalize some messed up things when we're growing up. As you start off your adult life, that's the time to actively work at unpacking the things you've brought with you from childhood and deciding which things are helping you and which things are harming you. This might mean therapy or joining a spiritual group or reading new things or just making special time to be in your own head.

Learn the lessons you missed. In this, I mostly mean practical things. "Adulting." Areas of your day-to-day practical life that are causing you extreme stress are probably related to a knowledge or experience gap. Do you hate cooking and cleaning or were you not taught how to do it properly? Are you afraid of making medical appointments or is it just something new you're not used to? Does money make you queasy or do you need to learn how to make a budget?

Find something fulfilling. This can be your job. It can be volunteer work. It can be faith. It can be a hobby. It can be creating things. It can be challenging yourself physically. It can be activism. It can be going for walks in nature. Everyone finds fulfillment in different places. If you're not finding it where you are, look somewhere else.

[unknownplane]

The Court Jester Part 3

Yandere Batfam x GN Reader

Pt. 1, Pt. 2, Pt. 4

The Joker came closer, almost inspecting the job (Y/N) had done. His eyes run over the Bat.

"Good job with the knots, my little Jester. That will keep him there for as long as we want!" The Joker exclaimed with a large grin. "Now, how did you get him here so fast! I must know!"

"I can't tell you, Dad! It would ruin the game. And we love the game!" (Y/N) explained. (Y/N) went up to the Joker and side hugged him. Bruce saw this and started struggling.

"What have you done to them! They said you 'Trained' them! I know you! Tell me now!" Bruce screamed.

The Joker's smile widened as he saw the Bat struggle. "Peanut, would you be so kind and get your dad something to drink? I am absolutely parched." The Joker said with honeyed words.

"Of course, dad!" (Y/N) said, jumping at the opportunity to please their dad. They ran out of the room hoping to get a drink as fast as possible.

"Look at them. I'm so proud of their growth. You know they were so sad when I first met them. They were only 5. They were looking for someone to talk to. Can you believe it, Bruce Wayne, ignoring one of his own while still taking in new kids. Can you imagine how that felt?!" Joker laughed unknowingly rubbing salt in Bruce's wounds.

"It was perfect, you know. Them being in such dire need of affection and not caring who it came from! A perfect opportunity for me to step in and take them away! At first, they resisted. Fought so hard not to succumb! They even called out for you. Did you know that!?" Joker confessed, stunning Bruce. Even after all he did, you still called out to him? You called for your dad, your real dad.

"It took a while to get them like this. Lots of training. Brutal, really. Though nothing I haven't done to you and your birds, just in a shorter period of time." Joker stated as if he was talking about weather and not torture. This shocked Bruce, remembering all the things the Joker did to his family. "How are they alive?!" Batman questioned.

"That's the funny thing, Bat! No matter what I did to them, they wouldn't die! They would get injured, but only a few seconds would pass, and then it would completely heal! I even cut off an arm, and as you can see, they have both now! Amazing, isn't it!" The Joker exclaimed. This stunned Bruce. (M/N)'s child was Meta? No. He would have noticed.

"Now, what is taking that child so long?" The Joker said brazenly.

With (Y/N)...

(Y/N) scrambled around looking for a bottle of water when someone came up behind them. They were suddenly grabbed and restrained. "The fuck!" (Y/N) exclaimed. "Relax it's just me. I'm here to save you." Jason whispered assuming (Y/N) would stop fighting when they heard it was him. (Y/N) struggled to move surprising Jason giving them a little wiggle room. (Y/N) jabbed their elbow into Jason's stomach pushing him back into a coughing fit.

With Jason off them, they turned around. "You aren't supposed to be here, Hood." (Y/N) stated glaring. They move their hands to their hip and pull out a small stick. They hit a button, and it enlarges to become a marotte.

(Y/N) swings at Jason as he tries to dodge, not wanting to hurt his sibling. This goes on until something pierces (Y/N) in the back of their nape. They start slowing down until they pass out.

"Took you long enough." Jason said flatly, going over to (Y/N). "They were putting up more of a fight than we all thought. I needed to get a clean shot." Damian claimed. He was lying to himself. He just wanted to assess how his older sibling fought, and from what he could tell, if they were taking this fight seriously, it wouldn't have ended well. "Let's just get them out of here. The others are waiting." Jason said, knowing that when he got to the manor, he would finally get to be the sibling they needed.

Giddy, he picked them up as if they were the most precious thing in the world and started leaving. "I'll go help dad." Damian said flatly as it seemed like a chore.

With Batman...

"Why? Why would you do those horrible things to a child?!" Bruce questioned. "For fun." The Joker spoke with a wolfish smile.

The door crept open, catching Bruce's eye. He saw his youngest creeping in the room. "You know I believe this is one of the only instances in which I would be willing to kill you." Bruce said, letting Damian he had permission to try and kill the Joker. "Really! I pushed you to that level with this one joke!? How wonderful! I will have to keep this in mind for later! Now, if only that bra -" a sudden gunshot stopped the Joker from finishing his sentence.

Blood rushed from the left side of Joker's face as he fell to the ground dead. "Where is your sibling?!" Bruce questioned with urgency. "They are on their way home with Hood. If we leave right now, we should be able to get there at the same time." Damian informed Bruce. "Good now untie me so we can leave. Your siblings got a mean knot." Bruce commanded.

-------------------------------------------------------

@cooki3dough @asillysimp @kitty-from-daaaa-voidddd @redkarmakai @horror-lover-69 @bat1212 @wisefuncherryblossom

[suguru-getos]

What about yan Satosugu who take it too far? Imagine them breaking their darling to a damage they can’t repair?

ksjdfshgkkjsh this is my favorite troupe.

warnings: v v v dark! (reader die-th? reader can contemplate :3), belt-spanking, reader ran away from satosugu, mentions of throwing-up, abuse, self-harm.

"please daddy, please no no no…" little human that satoru and suguru loved oh so much, why did you have to escape? it breaks their heart. you know it just from their facial expressions. "suguru- please" you whine out, shuddering and crying with wailing screams. you are hung from the ceiling, throttling on your tippytoes, ass bruised from the way the belt welts on you. you are bleeding from the skin breaking. "daddy- please." your voice stops coming out from your throat, too traumatized and destroyed by screaming and wailing for mercy. "please- please" you are wheezing out in air, your own voice has given up. "ssh, it's okay. just 4 more." suguru chides, "didn't want to hurt you." he muses, landing the smack of the belt across your ass once more. satoru smirked, oh you look so cute, unable to scream anymore and just dancing on your feet with the impact. you feel nausea hurling your movements, throwing up because you couldn't take it anymore. though nothing comes out except water… you haven't eaten well, since after your running spree.

that stops suguru, and satoru hugs you gently. "just three more." they have decided they would finish the punishment no matter what. "sshh~ don't worry, doing so good for us. I will clean you up." if you really can't be theirs, they would make you fear them into submission. make you fear them and forcefully take their love which they're owed.

the next three hits come, and when it stops. you're too dazed with pain to even register the comfort. the flesh of your ass raw and agitated. bruised, welted, veins popped and skin breaking in blood. "ssh ssh, that's it. it's over now. you did so good. it's all over." suguru coos, demeanor changed instantly as he gathers you in his arms. immediately taking you towards the bathroom. they need to clean up their poor baby. "why do you even run away angel… do you not know we are the strongest?"

satoru sighs, he is still wrangled by the feeling of betrayal intertwined with the feeling of guilt for giving you so much pain, panic and trauma.

"that's okay princess… you wouldn't do it again right? tell suguru you wouldn't do it again." he asks you gently, ignoring the way your half-lidded eyes do not respond after the torture. oh you're passing out, satoru gnaws at his lip, watching you look lifeless.

it was expected, you passed out in front of suguru and satoru. and they had a long discussion whether or not it was right or wrong to subject you into something like this. "satoru, punishments are supposed to hurt." suguru reminds, while satoru nods, "not until she passes out, she even threw up…" he sighs, "but she didn't need to run, that's also true." suguru nodded. "I know, I can understand that… hurts me more than it hurts her." suguru chimes, and satoru nods. "I wouldn't be able to do it, I would've stopped when she started crying." he admits, only suguru could get firm enough to carry it throughout.

they are mixed with guilt and promise each other to be kinder, there is no way you would actually love them after this. that fleeting hope that fueled satoru's delusion was now making him restless.

the next day when you wake up, you were a completely different person, screaming from panic the moment the two men entered with breakfast, it was so evident how your fear made you cry out for help. it makes suguru tear up, because you do not look at satoru the way you look at suguru. you look like you want to die, like you would do anything to be granted death.

"angel… it's okay, it's all over. please-" suguru almost begs, and you feel like throwing up again. this time satoru takes the lead, walking towards you and hugging you. he was clearly not welcome. yet… your body couldn't help but relax a little under his warm embrace. it was only until a few hours later, that they found you in the bathroom, head bleeding… passed out. you had just excused yourself to shower. limping all the way… to inflict a pain like that, was terrifying. who said they could only instil pain and fear into you. you couldn't find blades, couldn't find anything… so you banged your head against the fucking wall instead… "is this how much you fucking hate me!" satoru screams out, checking your pulse.

"SUGURU!" he screams, and the latter comes out rushing. watching you life-less in satoru's hold. "is- is she?" suguru blinks, tears brimming in his eyes.

it was clear, satosugu could never hope to win. not when you clearly fear them more than your own death.

[yandere-romanticaa]

Haven't written about Viktor in a hot minute, no clue if anyone missed him but you're getting crumbs regardless of your feelings.

P.S. I'm editing this later after it was posted. I was very tired when I wrote this.

yandere mortician masterlist.

Every single evening, Viktor could find you sitting alone in a coffee shop.

It was standard procedure for him by this point, so much so that it even became a part of his schedule. He would always finish his work early and skip off to find you, always lurking in the comfort of darkness.

He was unsure on how to feel about seeing you like this. Like clockwork, Viktor would watch you scour your city for a new place to huddle up in for a few hours, always alone. Viktor always found this odd as he knew that you had some good friends, friends who you love and adore.

Why did you never bring them with you, he would often ponder.

Without skipping a beat, his heart never failed to swell with the tiniest hint of joy in catching you alone like this, even if Viktor knew all too well that he was no better than a phantom to you. It felt intimate somehow, watching you in your element like this. Sometimes you would bring a book with you and spend the time reading. Viktor was always curious which novels you liked, always quickly looking them up and finding out everything he possibly could about them. If he had the time, he would even go through some of those books if he could find them as he wished to learn more about your preferences.

Hours would pass, people would come and go. Viktor would sometimes tune back into the world around him and see how the rest of the world was doing. It was so fascinating to listen in to some of those conversations. People had plans, great plans and most of them would just go down the drain.

He never was much of an optimist. He was used to being compared to a stormy cloud of pessimism, but he never saw himself in such a light. Viktor always thought of himself as more of a realist if he was being frank. All those big dreams would stay just that - dreams. That was how things usually went for most normal people. Not even the most exceptional human beings on the planet could escape the dull ache of normalcy, the cold realization that you really were just one person in this world. If you were to die, the world would continue to spin, seasons would change and life would go on.

Sipping on his hot drink, Viktor laughed bitterly to himself. Life could be so cruel sometimes. The stench of the chemicals he was working with earlier clung onto him tight, causing some people to wonder what was so off about him. Viktor would try to clean himself from top to bottom, but it was all to no avail.

That was simply how his world functioned. Death and decay were nothing to him, all in the day's work. Although, his world was not so bleak, he supposed.

He had you now.

Every single person around him was trapped in their own little bubble, completely unaware of anything. He was no different, he supposed. His bubble consisted of his piping hot coffee, chill November air, the blinding lights and his favorite person in the whole world.

This was enough for him, for now.

[heartfullofleeches]

Ride or Die

Yan 🌽star + Stoner Reader

Summary: After a deal gone wrong, you text your roommate for help.

[Mentions of Weed]

-

Thursdays are pizza night.

It isn't much in the grander scheme of things, but to Brie it is the domesticity of the relationship blossoming between you. Not exactly just friends, yet still barely pushing the limits of the platonic bond you already shared before moving in. You've kissed him before, allowed him to sleep in your bed- Then again, the "kiss" was a conducting force for a mouthful of smoke you gave fair warning for him to prepare himself for; the night in your room being the outcome of him spitting up a lung moments later.

Brie didn't know what to do anymore.. Continue this little game of cat and mouse, praying somewhere deep down you feel the same way about him. Or move onto someone else, never able to give them the entirety of his heart because he knows a part of it will always belong to you.

"Why can't I cry anywhere else but the produce isle!" Brie bitterly whispers to himself as he swabs the corners of his eyes with the sleeve of his sweater. Your sweater to be more precise. He'd rather not have a repeat of last week- That sweet lady was only trying to console him, but his face gets red as the tomatoes he used for his sauce crying over what may never be.

Whatever.

As far as Brie was aware, you didn't have a partner nor anyone you were really interested in, and you practically told each other everything. Maybe somewhere along the line, he could find happiness in this in-between stage in your relationship. Even if you weren't his partner, he still had you as a shoulder to cry on and the best roommate he could ask for.

"Get over yourself, Brie- You're going to make them the greasts pizza they've ever had, and if they haven't already fallen in love with you - they'll met someone who's a shitty cook and realize what they're missing!"

Isn't that the dream? These days, it feels like you're the only thought on his mind. He can hear your voice now.

"Brie? Brieeeee~ Pick up or I'll use your full government. Heh, you know I'm messing with you. But, seriously, pick up."

Oh. That's... your ringtone. The message was one of the first voicemails you left him when he purchased a new phone. He's missed plenty of calls from you hearing it out to completion.

"You rang, babe?"

That got a good chuckle out of you the first time. It was a total blunder on Brie's end, but you insisted he keep the nickname if he wanted to. There's no jovial air coming from your end of the line. Not even a snicker as your voice picks up over the silence.

"I need your help."

Never in your years long friendship had he heard you sound so serious before. There were glimpses - swiftly desected by your infections laughter or the change of topic, but never like this.

"I'm, I'm on my way." Brie switches his phone over to his left ear, propping it up with his shoulder. "What's wrong? Are you sick? Did you hurt yourself?"

"I think I killed a guy."

The line goes dead.

Brie gazes upwards at the tiled ceiling, phone slipping from his grasp as his thumb hoovers where the end call button once was. He regains his grip on the device as a text message comes in.

Its a picture of the body. Sprawled out with their arms and legs angled in different directions.

He can't catch his breath. Brie has always tried to drill it into your thick skull he'd do anything for you no matter what - and he meant it. Taking someone's life... It's unforgivable in most people's eyes. Especially the law's. If you got caught. If he lost you- What would that mean for him? The future you had together?

Racing through the aisles like a chicken without its head, Brie makes several stops on his way to the cash register. Cleaning, household goods, cutlery. He grabs items as soon as they're checked out and stuffs them into his backpack as he pays, evading his ritual of fishing through his wallet for the exact cash and change.

Brie isn't crazy enough to run red lights. He does, however, forget his seatbeat as he floors his car home; flying just beneath the legal speed limit for the area. He speeds up the tiny flight of stares leading to your apartment - bursting through the already unlocked front door.

"Babe! Baby, in here- I brought bleach, and trash bags, and- and.... These knives should be sharp enough to cut up their limbs- We can even move closer to my parents if we have to!"

Tripping over his own words and feet, Brie dumps the the contents of his backpack on the living room floor. It's then he notices how clean the floor actually is. No blood stains, no evidence of a fight. His eyes search the room, falling upon you in an unbothered state - seated on the couch next to a shivering man nervously sipping from a glass of water.

"Brie!" Standing, you make short work of the distance between you as you swarm Brie with a firm hug. "Missed you, pretty boy. You're back a little sooner than I expected not gonna lie."

Adrenaline depleting, Brie points over your shoulder at the stranger. "I thought he was..."

"He? Oh, right!- Brie, this is Nicky. Nicky, this is Brie. He came to buy some of my stash since his med card just expired and he doesn't like buying full price. Normally I would've done it elsewhere since I don't want to bring strangers into your space, but he's heading out of town once he leaves.... If he still can."

Nicky offers a timid wave to Brie, placing his cup down seconds before collapsing on the couch.

"Don't worry, he should be fine after a little nap."

Air flows freely through Brie's lungs as he clings onto you. You aren't a murderer. There isn't anything jeopardizing things between you- besides himself.

"You're such a jerk."

Pulling away from your embrace, Brie was torn between slapping or kissing you as you grin back at him. "What? Didn't actually think I killed the guy, did you?"

"Yes?! Because of your little prank I wasn't able to get everything I needed for dinner! I was ready to throw my entire life away for you! And it's all just a big joke to you!"

"Thanks, Brie."

Tension building behind his eyes, a soft kiss to his forehead keeps the tears at bay just a little longer.

"It's nice to have someone I can depend on for anything. That's rare to come by these days. If you're ever in the same situation, but for real- you know who to call."

Sniffling, Brie rests his head on your arm.

"You're damn right I do."

[readychilledwine]

The Fire in Spring

Summary - Calanmai is the most important night in Spring, and how lucky for you to be mated to the night's main attraction

Warnings - smut, mating press, oral, fingering, praise kink, biting kink, implied voyeurism, sex magic, implied orgy, loose editing (we die like men here)

A/n - Sorry, this is later than expected! I went back and forth and eventually decided to leave it vague enough that it could be part of Lost Bonds or read without it. I also wanted it to fit @tamlinweek d4 prompts, so did that the best I could without forcing other people to read the mini series if they haven't already 💕

Tamlin Masterlist

The Cave was hot. Almost unbearable. 

Or maybe that was just your skin as you were laid on the centered bed. Whatever had taken over the gentle male you once knew was starved. It was desperate, hungry, and wanting. 

You had been stripped bare on the way to the cave, and even just the brush of his bare chest on yours had you moaning softly, eyelids flutter shut as you did. You had never experienced sex magic before, but you could see why so many books warned against it. How you felt right now could easily become an addiction. 

Tamlin was kissing down your neck, nipping and sucking as he went to ensure you were covered in his marks and bruising. The paint on his body had begun staining your skin, another sign that you were his for the night and his for the taking. Your hands moved without permission, exploring his shoulders, his biceps, and his forearms. He was stunning. You knew that from the moment you laid eyes on him, but getting to admire him up close was almost too much.

Green eyes met yours before he wrapped his lips around your left nipple, sucking and flicking the bud until he was content with the sounds of your moans and the peak it had formed. He gave the right the same attention, smirking against your skin at the little gasps leaving your throat. “Tam,” you whispered his name, tugging on his soft blonde locks. “More.”

“More?” He chuckled against your skin as his fingers danced down your sides before gripping your soft hips. “What does my pretty mate need more of?” His kisses trailed down again as he waited for an answer. He bit your inner left thigh as you zoned out, watching the action send chills through your body to alert to the pain. “Stay with me, y/n. I want to see the way your eyes look when I make you cum in my tongue.” 

You could hardly process his words, but you raised yourself to your elbows and watched. There was an odd sense of power that came with having a male between your thighs. That first lick of his tongue through the slick mess made your head fall back, a soft fuck coming through your lips. He took it as permission, savoring each drop of you as his tongue ran from your entrance, dipping in at times for more of a taste, to circling your clit. You could feel yourself growing more and more wet. “You love this, don't you?” He licked at your clit again. “It makes you feel like a queen, doesn't it? Having me please you like this?” You could only moan in response, wiggling your hips as you tried to push him into continuing.  

He dove back in, lips locking around your clit as he ran a finger up your core. Your head fell back again as he pushed it in, curling it instantly to that sensitive spot inside of you like he already knew your body like the back of his hands. You could feel that coil tightening, core twitching around his finger. You looked back him and could have came at the sight alone. Tamlin's eyes shut in peace as he enjoyed every second of what he was doing to you.

He pushed a second finger in, opening you up for later. It took seconds for you to fall over the edge, and he moaned against you as you did. His name was a prayer on your lips, falling over and over again as he worked you through the high, only stopping as you pushed his head away.

He held eye contact with you as he cleaned his fingers, licking them and sucking them before grabbing both of your thighs and pushing your knees towards your chest. “Hold them there.” You obeyed mindlessly, a warm haze setting in all over again. You needed Tamlin like water. It was as if he was the only one capable of putting out the fire in your stomach, and you were becoming desperate to feel normal again.

“Please,” his hand went to your thigh, eyes shining in sympathy for a brief moment.

“I have you, y/n,” He was inside of you in one fluid thrust, groaning in time with the loud moan that left your body. He lifted your hips, squeezing your ass as he did, and he began. 

He pounded into you as if both of your lives depend on it. He was the most vocal lover you had ever had. Praising you with each roll of his hips. Whimpering each time you twitched around him. Groaning as your legs fell open wider allowing him deeper into you. 

Your moans were becoming higher pitched and breathy as he reached places healers wouldn't have even known about. You couldn't whispering his name between moans, you couldn't stop arching your back. Your nails dug into his arms bringing him closer to you and locking him into a kiss. 

His forehead came to rest on yours, the pace slowing significantly as it did. “You are so beautiful.” The praise shot straight through you making you whimper his name again. “In all the years I've lived, I have never laid eyes on someone more beautiful than you, and I never win.” Your hands moved to dig into his shoulders, legs wrapping around his waist as his pace picked up again. 

“I need you to cum,” he moaned into your ear, kissing the tip lightly. “Need to feel you squeezing me with this pretty pussy.” It was as if he had unlocked something deep inside of you, stomach twisting and a knot forming as he continued. “I could bury myself inside of you and die a happy male. You are so perfect. So tight and warm. Feels so good, petal.” 

The praise made you feel light headed, “Tamlin, please.”

His finger moved to your clit, circling it in time with his thrusts. “Go ahead. Cum for me. Let everyone here know how good I'm fucking my mate.” 

The possession, the long forgotten crowd watching and fucking in time with you two, the feeling of electricity shooting through you. You fell off the edge, screaming his name as you did, and triggered his own fall, screaming again as he bit into your shoulder and emptied into you. 

Heavy breathing was all you could hear as you came back down. Soft kisses on your brow bone worked you back to the present. “You did so good, y/n. Rest for a bit. We're just beginning.”

General Taglist:

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[mrsnancywheeler]

the lakes (3) // finnick odair x f. reader

summary: it's supposed to be over, you and Finnick are supposed to spend the rest of your lives helping each other heal. living as peacefully as possible, but the the third quarter quell throws a wrench in your domestic bliss.

previous chapter / next chapter

midnight rain

2.3k words

warnings: angst, talk of mental illness and su!cidal ideations, allusions to trafficking, mentally unstable reader who's in denial, allusions to death and violence, hurt/comfort, arguments, something gets thrown in anger, terms of endearment, dreams of domestic bliss, savior complex Finnick and reader, no use of y/n, unedited

⠀ 𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒

The familiarity of the train car made you shudder. The first time its elegance had amazed you, but now it was commonplace, a trade for everything else that had been given. The escort who you'd known for years, but always blocked out because of her unmatchable insensitivity was babbling on in her overwhelming syrupy voice as your brain buzzed with anxiety. When the smashing of a glass on the train's wall brought you back to the audio of the train cab.

“Can we wait to break things until the games? After all this time, Finnick, you still need your manners." She tutted, waving her hand in the air. “Plenty of time to get the aggression out later, right now just bask in the attention. Now I'm going to go check over the mentoring plans." Her neon purple eyebrows were so animated when she spoke and the color assaulted your eyes, the click of her heels echoing she exited.

Finnick had buried his head in his hands over a counter top as you quietly knelt down to pick up pieces of shattered glass. An Avox would end up cleaning the mess later, but you didn't feel comfortable just leaving it there.

“Why can't I help you?" His voice was much softer and more broken than you'd expected. Calloused hands holding his face as he stared out the train window.

“Help me?" Your confusion was evident. "You have helped me.”

“No I haven't, I'm an enabler." He shook his head, sniffling through the tears you hadn't noticed forming, your heart cracking.

You stood, dropping the glass pieces you'd been holding to approach him. "No you're not, Finnick, enabling what? Talk to me.”

He turned to you, "Talk to me. You're always trying to take care of me, angel, and I love that about you. But you use it as an excuse to hide the fact you're not doing better.”

"I am doing better, I don't understand what you're talking about, Finnick! I understand if you're angry, I just-”

"What? You looked at Annie and thought, ‘She’s too fragile to handle this, so why don't I take it all on for her? I can handle this.’" 

You nodded, “I can! I couldn't let her- I couldn't let her die.”

“But you can let yourself?" He had raised his voice ever so slightly, but it was enough that your chest was tightening. “You're punishing yourself for what you had to do to survive when you were 17! This isn't about altruism, this is about guilt."

“I'm not selfish.” Your voice was steely, you were angry. Why was he trying to pry at things that were of no matter to the present issues? "I'm doing my part, it wouldn't be right of me not to!" 

"Nobody thinks you're selfish except yourself. You could die because you want to prove something about what happened in the arena. That arena is gone, you need to focus on the now. On your now, not mine. You want to suffer in silence, you want to focus on everybody else to make up for living.”

"Stop it, Finnick! I don't want to talk about this. Be upset with me, but there are more important things to focus on.” You refused to make eye contact as you wrapped your arms around your body. There was a rebellion to plan for, no time for a psychoanalyzation of your brain, so you needed to deflect.

“You're my wife, angel, there's nothing more important to me than that. Especially since I've done such a shitty job letting you sit there, comfort, and listen to my problems while you only ever ask to be held. Why don't you trust me?” He stepped closer to you, voice delicate.

"I do trust you.” You kept your eyes planted on the ground. He was supposed to be angry or sad, but not whatever this was.

"Then why don't you say anything after you get a call from the Capitol? Why is it always only a few minutes after your nightmares to discuss how you feel, but every other waking moment is about me? I want to protect you, I want you to stop ruining yourself over the past and let me help you like you do for me.”

“I don't want to talk about it, Finnick." You were pushing down the onslaught of tears beginning to fall down your frozen face. “Can we please, not talk about it." You whispered as you shrunk into yourself.

“We have to start dealing with it, you are self-destructive, just because you hide things doesn't mean you're better set then Annie is. You are not going to step into this arena and sacrifice yourself for someone to make up for the fact you killed Conway six years ago."

“You're being mean."

“No I'm not, I'm being honest. You won't deny it because you know I'm right, this is a suicide mission to make up for all of them. Dying the second time around doesn't bring them back and neither will anything else. But if you put yourself in danger to make up for things we all had to do to be where we are now, you'll be killing me too.” 

You began walking straight past him, to comfort and be comforted was the dance that held you which was being broken as each second passed. This was unfair, having trauma didn't make you as hurt as him or Annie. You just had natural human feelings about what had happened and reconciling for that wasn't dangerous.

“You can't just walk away when I stop coddling you for a second, this is all going to be okay, if you can recognize and let me help you heal. If we're gonna do this I need the rational version of you." He trailed behind you as you kept walking.

“I don't need to be coddled, I'm sorry if you're sick of me trying to help you and everyone else, but that doesn't mean-" You gasped for air, “I'm just, I'm trying to help, maybe I am making up for what I did. I'm just sorry and I'm trying to help because I can't bear seeing other people having that light snuffed out of them. I want you to feel safe, and Annie, and Mags, and Ondine, that helps me.”

"See we can start there, you don't have to make up for what you did. Everyone did things to survive, we were kids. I can help you if we talk about it.”

"How are you supposed to help me, Finnick? I did worse things than you did, of course I'm guiltier, I preyed on someone's mind, on their feelings for me and then I killed them. And I'm so, so sorry for it everyday of my life and I feel it gnawing at my insides. I'm sorry that he's dead. I'm sorry that I was manipulative. I'm sorry for the person's I created. I'm sorry that I lied to you. I'm sorry that you're right. I'm sorry that I need to make it go away, Finnick, and it won't go away until I give it something equal even if it means I-” You wiped the tears from your face, “Finnick, I don't talk about it because being with you is reason enough to keep my grounded most of the time. I don't need to say anything when I see you and it's an easy reminder why I'm living."

“You shouldn't want to live just because of me. I want to be there for you, but when you feel that way I need you to be honest. You don't need to atone for any things, you deserve life. If we're going to go into that arena, you need to start believing that because I will not let you die. I love you and I need you to survive, to make it through with me to the end.”

You'd stopped walking and were leaning your back against the train wall. Nodding slowly, you were exhausted.

"I know you don't believe that right now, but I will make you believe it, my love.” His hand caressed your face and the radiating warmth made your ice cold face shudder.

You stared at him in silence before you let the sobbing take over your body. " I'm sorry, I don't know how to deal with it. I want to be better, I do, but I just can't. It won't go away.” His arms enveloped you like sunshine, guarding you from everything else.

“I know, sweet girl, I know." 

             𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒

Meanwhile Haymitch had to take the initiative to begin introducing his new tributes to the pack of well known, well introduced victors. Unbeknownst to Katniss and Peeta, he would of course be pulling strings to make sure they were in close proximity or at least had the attention of certain victors for the plan being hatched.

Katniss had not seemed thrilled at the idea of Finnick, but she was rarely thrilled with anyone.

“This year we have some volunteering, which will definitely spice things up a little bit. Two couples in one game, especially when one has been adored by the Capitol for years will keep their attention." Haymitch gestured to the screen where you were sending Annie back to the line with the other female tributes.

"Didn't she also have a relationship with the male tribute last time, isn't that how she won her games?" Katniss asked.

“Yes, Capitol Princess, she is just as adored, but more tame. The less cocky side of the duo you could say."

“I bet you he's not going to protect her when it comes down to it since she did the same thing last time. He's got to know that's just how she plays the game." Katniss reasoned, doubt of everyone taking hold.

“I'd be extremely surprised if that happened, they've been with each other for years and oh-" The cameras zoomed in on the seaweed and made rings on your fingers as you held hands. “Looks like that bond has gotten ever stronger. They'll be a pair and if she does die it would be a sad day, Katniss. She's a really nice lady regardless of what she did to win at 17.”

"It's not that different from you, you just got lucky.” Peeta remarked.

“I'm just saying she wouldn't be an easy ally to trust, I mean didn't she kill all of them when it came to the end?" Katniss shrugged, leaning forward. 

“This isn't about trust, it's about survival. You need allies, even if it means they end up dead at the end, you need them to survive. You're both fresh meat, these people have built a repertoire with each other for years. You're gonna need some of them on your side for as long as you can." 

"And you want us to go with them?”

" It wouldn't be a bad idea.” Peeta shrugged, "If he's gonna protect her then we'll be protected too.”

"Yeah until we become perceived threats too.”

"Hey, I'm just laying out your options. There are 22 tributes to pick from, I know these people so I'm giving you my insight. Whether or not you decide to take it is up to the two of you.” Haymitch gestured at both of them before turning back to the screen." So District 5.”

              𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒

“Finnick, what's the plan?" You asked as you two lay in the silky sheets of the bed.

"We have to get Katniss to trust us so we can get her out of the games. We'll be able to plan more once we get there.” His hand lazily lay on your shoulder,  grazing strands of your hair.

"And you'll keep me updated? No secrets?”

"No secrets, my love.” You hummed contently as you snuggled yourself deeper into his shoulder. "When we're in the arena, you need to stick by me. They'll probably try to split us up somehow, we can't let that happen.”

"I can take care of myself if it does.” You assured.

"I know that, but I need to know that you're safe. That you're not trying to throw yourself in front of someone else to save them before you.”

"Even if it's Katniss?” You said lightheartedly.

"We need to get her out of there, but I won't let that be at your personal risk. I owe you a real wedding, remember?”

"Oh, I remember. One with a dress.”

"Any dress you want, angel. So you have to listen to what I say, just this once, and stay with me in the arena and do as I say to stay alive.”

"That's two times.” You joked. " I don't know if I'm capable of doing that.” 

“Haha, very funny." He rolled his eyes. Silence took over for a second and you closed your eyes to let yourself rest with him. “I promise we'll get out of this and you'll get the life you deserve, we deserve."

“I trust you."

“Good because I mean it. We'll have our house back overlooking the ocean where little kids will run around outside, soaking up the sun and salt air. They'll have your beautiful laugh and your hair that'll whip around as they run.”

"And you're angel eyes, plus that disarming smile. We'll have to be on the lookout or we'll always give them their way.”

“You can read to me as I fish, you can sit on your favorite rock and I'll collect you all treasures. Annie and Mags will watch them so we can occasionally sneak away to swim in the sunset." 

"Oh you've got it all planned out, haven't you?”

"Of course, my love, the perfect life we can have when we're free from all of this.”

"Then I guess I'll have to listen to you to make that happen.” You laughed tiredly, body relaxing.

"Exactly, Mrs. Odair, so I can make sure our dreams come true, that everyone gets a chance to do the same.” Oh, your sweet, sweet boy. 

             𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒

thank you all so much for reading and for all the feedback! someone mentioned wanting to see haymitch presenting them and I thought that would be a great addition so thank @almostjollypizza for suggesting that! not gonna lie this was kind of a difficult chapter to write but I hope you guys enjoyed it, I'm excited to get to the Capitol and the stuff there. I have so many ideas! likes, comment, tags, reblogs, and asks are all super appreciated, love you guys, thank you! 💋

taglist: @imaegonstargaryenswife0 @avoxrising @artsyaquarium @jennaaaaaaaaaaaa @secretsicanthideanymore @darlingsoulbeautfulthoughts @thatonegayloser616 @skjdksjdhdjd @meri-soni-meri-tamanna

[pandorasworkshop]

💘Love is in the Air - Pick a Card

What's next for you in love? What about you charms the people around you?

Pandorasworkshop

Pile 1 Pile 2 Pile 3

Pile 1

Cards: Ace of cups, Eight of wands, Ten of cups

Reading: New beginnings in love is coming in for you. Or a special message from a special message from a special somebody. Whatever the message may be whether you're in a relationship or very single it will make you very happy. Blossoming relationships and happy endings. If you are wondering whether or not you should text someone or make the first move this is your confirmation. Some of you may even have a secret admirer planning on confessing soon. Whoever this person is they find your personality infectious and your style is adorable. If any of you guys are artists they are inspired by your art. This person is definitely a family person and a community centered person. If you are in a relationship they may want to introduce you to their family as the next step.

Signs: 555, harps, love story by indila, howls moving castle, getting or giving gifts, lattes, bunnies, the feeling of something exciting about to happen, soft blankets , warm tea, the eagle emoji?, Autumn.

Pile 2

Cards: Empress, queen of wands , tower, fool

Reading: some of you may have recently departed a relationship or may be planning to. Some of you could have been single for very single time but with this tower card I feel like this may not be for long and you will NOT have to wait. Love is coming rushing in quicker than water. I feel you guys are stepping into your empress energy. Some of you guys may have been cheated on in the past and this is causing some insecurities. Just know you are divine, let go of doubts because you are enough and with this Empress card I'm getting this confirmation. Whoever this person who is coming in they are like a hurricane. Your life will be significantly changed by them. Whatever energy you have is like honey people stick to you. I feel like some of y'all may even smell very nice.

Signs: 777, 666, red roses, star wars, spiderman, caterpillar, born to die by Lana del rey, wanting to learn a new language, chocolate covered fruit, sandwich with tomatoes in it, the moon.

Pile 3

Cards: the devil, temperance, strength and king of cups.

Reading: I'm getting an unsure energy that will eventually resolve in the right decision whatever you may decide. Whoever this person is they are OBSESSED and sexual chemistry is off the charts. It may even overwhelm you. This person is going to come in boldly and maybe with gifts? This person finds you so attractive and everything about you pulls them in. If you are unsure about your decision to ask the universe for a definite sign like a red balloon or something. King of cups energy is an emotional mature loyal man but with the devil and strength card I can see they have a bit of a wild side. If you haven't met this person yet I feel like you'll meet them while with friends, through friends, at a party? Definitely in a group setting. When you guys first meet you shine so brightly they're unable to take their eyes off you. I feel like you guys charm people through your eyes and smile. Many people feel at ease around you and you are a hard worker.

Signs: 333, 222, watches, sneezing, picnics, chocolate croissant, champagne, itchy fabrics, tripping down steps, brand new person by tame impala, guitar, cats, moss, doing some deep cleaning, spring, seeing the stars.

[bisnes-socks]

Professor 🙋‍♂️ I have an observation to share that I admit I haven't noticed before. You mentioned that Autiomaa first and second half of the song sets the theme apart from past to now with a different style of singing. Now that I listen closer, he's doing that with other songs too: RTG, Takavoltti, Kot Kot, S=M, etc.. second part tends to be either more 'shouty' or in slightly different voice tone. And I am absolutely eating it upppp :V

you are my favourite student for bringing this up. you get an A++ 💚

alright class, gather 'round. we're going to be talking about his vocal abilities, vocal styles and techniques and how he uses them to elevate songs and build different levels into them.

something you will often hear as criticism towards käärijä is that he's not a technically skilled singer. i have a friend who likes to remind me everytime we talk about eurovision 2023, that käärijä didn't get jury points "because he can't sing". but it's not that simple.

while clean melodic singing is not his strength, and it's true his vocal performance in the singing part of CCC was perhaps not the strongest on the ESC stage, up against a lot of technically skilled singers, what he does does actually take skill and it is not something just anyone could do at the drop of a hat. and if esc juries had actual vocal experts in them, instead of just radio pop producers, they might actually recognise that, but that's another rant for another day lmao.

you've all probably heard multiple CCC covers by now. how often do singers covering CCC sound comfortable doing all that? and how often do they sound like simply getting as low as he can go is a struggle? to hold on to that quality of voice, keep the volume and the breathing steady, and stick to basically one single note, and do all that live? that. takes. skill. there's a reason he isn't moving much in ccc live performances during the verses - he needs his body focused on producing the sound.

and CCC is a great example of him using different vocal styles to elevate the song. the first verse is in that low voice, then we get to the chorus, which is in a higher, more shouty voice - different textures! contrast between the sections! and then back to the low voice - but behold! the higher voice comes back now, for the second half of the verse, as the tempo of the rapping picks up. we're kicking into a different gear, and he is highlighting and emphasising that with a different vocal take. the song is going somewhere that sounds both new and familiar and that is sooooo important in a song like this, that is trying to make a big impact in a short amount of time. we're going somewhere new but the song isn't going to lose us, because we already know these elements - we heard these lyrics before, we heard this voice before, but it's something a little bit different know. the vibe is new and something else is coming!

and so after the second chorus we get to the melodic singing - again, a new vocal style! and then the softer part - again, a new vocal style! these aren't dramatic changes, but just enough to build the song and to familiarise us with these new sections, that will repeat, for us to feel and experience them again. brilliant songwriting and brilliant use of vocals!

you mentioned ready to go in your ask and that is an eeeeeexcellent example of his use of vocal styles, i could DIE! let's look at the choices here, they are delicious.

the thing to recognise about many käärijä songs is that ultimately, they are made up of quite simple ingredients. they aren't super complicated instrumentally a lot of the time, so if you look at ready to go, the musical elements in each section are, at the end of the day, quite simple. which is not unusual for the genre! so he brings a LOT into the mix with his different vocal styles, making the songs feel like they keep moving forward and building.

ready to go starts with one vocal style: quite a low and monotone voice, except lines start with a sort of a mechanical squeal in the voice. and it's quite a funny voice actually, it doesn't sound like a natural speaking voice. then we get to the pre-chorus: "oh, oh no, vaikka meikit valuu nii ei lopu show" part, and the voice is different. it's more of a singing quality, but still quite low. 

and then we get to the part that i'm sure everyone has realised is my favourite by now: "sä haluut nähä ku mä flomaan taas ojaan kuraiseen, hei baby i'm ready to go". there's no beat, there's just a synth-y carpet of a background, and he goes over it with quite a breathy tone, much higher than before. it's quite a flirty sound, on purpose i think. obsessed!

now! second verse! he could go back to the same voice he used in the first verse, but he doesn't. the song has moved on from that, it needs another layer to stay interesting. there is a change in the music as well, the palm muted guitar is now there for the whole verse, but the most noticable change is in his voice and the intensity. it's higher and sharper. 

he dips back into the lower voice for the pre-chorus, but that works in his favour, because going back down there, in the area we already know and are familiar with, allows the chorus to kick in hard when it does.

and this chorus is in full blast, the beat is there the guitar is there, and his voice is not so soft and breathy anymore. overall the voice is much sharper, much more resonate, much more engaged.

and then the song calms down again with "mä haluun ajaa tosi kovaa, vaik pelti kolisee, hei baby i'm ready to go" and he isn't quite as breathy and flirty as he was with the very first "sä haluut" part - because that wouldn't fit this part anymore. he has to go from here directly back into the full chorus at full blast. so he is softer, but not too soft - just the right style to calm it down and then jump back in.

he actually does know what he is doing vocally, even if he isn't one to belt like celine dion, you know?

and one more thing! i know how much people love his growly shouty voice - as heard in sex = money (tein onlyfans bagin section) or the last verse of yhtä vailla and many more. THAT takes technique to be able to do it so consistently and to be able to control the volume as he does. our beloved growly shouty vocals are actually a true testament of the fact that he is skilled with his voice. i'd like to see the best melodic singers do what he does for a song and see how well they do. because what he does is not easy.

now go forth class and find different vocal styles and textures in his songs! he is a vocal wizard and i love him for it. he is so flipping interesting to listen to.

[thinkingofausername]

Micah Bell headcanons:

He's only ever seen sleeping after he's gotten drunk so I imagine he has nightmares (aside from the fact he has extreme trust issues and can't let his guard down enough to sleep)

He didn't have a relationship with his mother or she died when he was little or she was abused by her husband. He never mentions her, we don't know anything about her. We know what his view on women is like. I imagine he got it from his father. He definitely wasn't born out of love

He took the majority of his father's wrath. We know firstborn Bells are traditionally named the same, so I believe there was a lot of pressure there

He's actually not all that cynical. He wants to be. All that talk of "nothing matters" is him trying to convince himself

He secretly wants companionship. It's been confirmed that he wanted Dutch to be a part of some sort of family of his. I don't think he's as much of a lone wolf as he wishes he was

He has abandonement issues. His brother left him and made another family and it affected Micah. It's seen in the fact he wrote to Amos as well as his behavior after his brother's answer. After Amos cuts ties with him for good he says "I want tomorrow to mean more than today. I want this whole damn shitshow to have some kinda meanin I haven't understood". He secretly resented his brother for doing what he never could - make a connection. He can only talk to people if he's riling them up

His father definitely forced him to perform his first kill. Probably when he was very young, so he would "toughen up"

In theory, I can see him having a somewhat good relationship. If his partner was tough they would have his respect. Trust would definitely take a while, vulnerability even more so, but I think he would show care in his own way - being posessive and protective, letting them handle his guns and horse (peak trust). We know how much he cares for his belongings. There would probably be passionate, adrenaline-filled sex after action, patching up wounds, cleaning guns together. A "partners in crime" sort of thing

He'd probably like bites and scratches during sex. Marking up his partner as well

He gave into the "hardened outlaw" life because he believes those are the cards he was dealt and the only ones he would ever have. He probably never thought he had a chance to be anything else

He definitely has a phobia of dogs or something similar. He very avidly reacted to Cain every time he got close, he even flinched one time

He genuinely laughed with Javier when they were drunk. He even said "I love you fellas". There was definitely a humane side of him, very deep down

His father never held any pride for him, god forbid praise. He craves hostility because it's the only thing he knows. He purposefully riles people up and laughs off every insult he receives

He obviously held genuine respect and admiration for Dutch. He wasn't just using him or manipulating him or buttering him up for betrayal. I genuinely believe he was looking for a place of his own. He never really showed an authoritative side or desire to lead. He said it himself that he's a survivor. It wasn't ambition, it was just searching for shelter and stability. That's why he ratted - the stability was gone

He died miserable. I could go on and on about his death but the main points are - he calmly accepted getting shot, he shrugged and silently fell to his death. That was not a man who saw a future for himself

I left the most biased headcanon for the end. Not to be the "I can fix him" girl but I genuinely believe a softer side of him could've been drawn out. I believe he could've had a "ride or die" person of his own. Two survivors, watching each other's back, suspicious of others but not each other, enjoying the uncertainty and freedom of life, two loose ends but tied together

[cowboydisaster]

could you write a fic about simon and a reader who is going through withdrawals? Sorry if that's not real specific, you can take it in what ever direction you please. Thank you

Hope

pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x fem! reader word count: 2k summary: Simon helps you get through withdrawals, offering you hope in the darkest point of your life. a/n: heed the warnings please!!!! I cried a good bit while writing this. You're never alone my friends, and there is always hope. Always. (p.s. there is a mention of wanting children in this fic, so keep that in mind. p.p.s why does tumblr destroy my image quality, it makes me sad.) warnings: opioid addiction, withdrawals, addiction, emetophobia, illness masterlist

"Si-Simon, I can't do this. I'm n-not strong enough." You whimper, clammy hands gripping onto his shirt with every pathetic ounce of strength that you can muster. Your voice is hoarse, throat thick with mucus and body covered in a stale cold sweat that soaks through your oversized t-shirt. Simon has never seen you so weak, so frail in his arms.

He's seen you take down men twice your size, clear rooms with more than ten enemies. You've faced countless opponents, broken through endless physical and mental barriers,  but in the end, the one thing you couldn't defeat was the pills. 

If you'd known you were trading your life away when you were handed the bottle, you never would have taken it in the first place. 

"For the pain." The doctor had said, "Just until this gunshot wound clears up."

Only it didn't. Before you even realized it, your body was already addicted. You craved the numbness that the damned capsules gave you, the release from the endless pain that singed your nerves day and night. You couldn't give them up. You tried– but the sickness that came when you stopped– you were sure it would kill you. 

Simon didn't know what to do. You lied, you kept him at a distance, never fully explaining to him what was going on. He didn't realize how bad it was. He tried not to pry, or to push you, but Simon put his foot down when he found you on the bathroom floor unconscious, a bottle of pills on the counter, half empty. His words reverberated in your ears, a harsh warning that he wouldn't watch you kill yourself. 

"You have to get clean, Y/N." He'd said from a place of love, but you couldn't help but crumble under his judgment, "I can't watch you do this to yourself anymore. You 'ave to sober up."

So here you are, a heap in Simon's lap, the both of you intertwined on the bathroom floor as you fight the overwhelming illness that accompanies withdrawals. Everything you've survived: loss, wounds, torture– it pales in comparison to the misery you're experiencing now. You refused to go to a detox center, not wanting to lose your position in the Task Force. You promised Simon that you'd let him drive you to the hospital if things got bad, but you want to do this at home. 

Bile rises from your stomach, lingering in the back of your throat as you gag. Immediately, Simon pulls your hair back into his fist, and helps to position you over the toilet. 

You dry heave, gagging on air as both of your cold hands grip the toilet bowl. Your wedding band glints in the dim bathroom light, bringing another layer of anguish to your already broken soul. 

He shouldn't have to deal with this. 

"Easy, love. Get it all out. I've got you." Simon coos as your stomach aches and flips, desperate to rid itself of any contents. Only you haven't been able to eat, so nothing comes up but painful bursts of air. You gasp and heave, collapsing back against Simon and erupting into loud sobs. Your bones ache as you fall onto his chest, and his hands hover over your form, unsure on how to hold you without shattering you even further. 

"I can't– I can't! Simon, please! Please. I'm going to die. M' gonna die–" You panic, "I'm not strong enough. You know that I'm not." You plead, begging for the substance that he has already flushed down the drain, your mind refuses to believe that it's actually gone. 

Simon's previously unbreakable heart manages to crack, and he wishes more than anything to carry the burden of your suffering. You're his wife, and it's his job to take the weight off your shoulders, but he can't do this for you. He can, however, be with you every step of the way. You showed him a new way of living, a way to do more than just survive. You've shown him love when he was undeserving of it. It's unbearable for him to see you, such a beam of light, in so much pain. 

"Look at me, baby. Look at me." Simon holds your face until your eyes meet his. Those chestnut colored irises hold your attention– the same ones you looked into as you read your vows, as you suffered pain, and loss, felt love and lust. They've watched after you through everything. 

"You can do this, yeah? You're the strongest person I know. Stronger than any other soldier in the Task Force, stronger than me. If anyone can beat this, it's you." Simon reassures. 

Your face crumples when you realize he's firm in his decision. You shake your head, clammy palms coming to rest against your face. 

"Please, Simon." You beg once again. Your body is trembling like a leaf held against the wind, cold wraps around your bones suffocatingly, squeezing every ounce of comfort from your being and leaving you high and dry. Pure, unadulterated suffering. 

"Come 'ere." Simon whispers, standing up from the tile floor and scooping you into his arms. He hooks his arms under your head and knees before carrying you into the bedroom. 

The soft bed dips under your shared weight as Simon lays down with you, his body wrapping around your own like a perfect puzzle piece. He pulls your back to his chest, letting you use his tattooed arm as a pillow. Your sobs quiet down to muffled whimpers as you shake lightly, wishing you could go back in time, solve this before it became a problem. 

Father time has never been merciful though, has he? 

"Blanket or no?" Simon asks. You nod your head quickly. 

"Yes, it's so cold. I'm so cold." Your teeth chatter lightly as you reiterate. Simon pulls the thick comforter over your forms, tucking it in around the edges as he adjusts behind you. 

An hour ago you were burning up, stripping off your clothes and sobbing at the heat clawing its way through your body like some sort of fiery plague. He'd put you in a cool bath, checking your temperature probably more often than what was necessary. 

You shake and writhe, whimpers and groans of agony slipping past your lips every once in a while. It's killing Simon to see you like this. Every ounce of light has drained from your eyes, the life has seeped from your pores, replaced with the lingering disease of addiction. He misses your laughter, your smile. It could light up a room. You've gotten the boys through many dark days. You were the sunshine of the Task Force. Failed missions, loss, heartache, no matter how bad things got, your optimism never ceased. Not until recently, anyhow. 

"We'll get there again." Simon tells himself like a mantra in his head,"She'll get better." 

He's personally seeing that you do. He won't allow you the pills to take hold of you, he'll fight. He's seen more soldiers die from pills than bullets. He won't let you meet that fate, he won't. 

He can't lose you. 

The room is covered with a calm silence, only the sound of your quick breathing to let him know you're still alive. Simon is quiet as well, and you drown in the silence, hoping for any kind of distraction to pull you away from your unending misery. You can feel yourself giving up, wanting nothing more than to slip into old habits. You slip your eyes shut, opening them only once a voice rumbles in your ear. 

"I was thinking… when you're better we'll get a bigger house." Simon quietly blurts out from behind you. 

A wrinkle forms in between your brows, and you crane your neck to look at him. You're sure he's trying to distract you, coming up with random conversation to keep your mind off of the present. When you look back, his gaze is far away, fixed on something on the far wall. A small smile graces his uncovered lips– he's been keeping the mask off at home recently, you've noticed. There is a light in his eyes, a light that you used to think would never grace the eyes of Simon Riley. 

"What? Why would we need a bigger house?" You ask with a small chuckle. He's succeeding in his distraction, you realize. 

His eyes flicker down to yours, hand gripping onto your waist as you turn towards him in curiosity. Your eyelids are heavy, another wave of exhaustion coming over you. 

"For the little ones." Simon responds.

He says it on a breath. He says it so plainly, so effortlessly, that tears immediately well in your eyes. He's never responded to your questions about children– usually shutting down or ignoring the topic wholly. Your lip wobbles, and he runs his thumb over the cracked skin. 

"Ch-children?" You ask, a new sense of hope filling your being. A new reason to fight– to get clean. Children. A family. 

"A girl, with your eyes…" Simon chuckles, "Probably with your attitude too." 

You laugh at that, tears slipping down your cheeks in landing on his hand that cups your face. 

"Maybe a boy. Hopefully he gets your features n' not my ugly mug." Simon huffs. 

"What changed…?" You ask, wincing as a wave of nausea pulses through your body. Simon's eyes go wide for a second, and his grip tightens on you, ready in an instant to carry you back into the bathroom if you need. The pain passes and you shake your head, signaling that you're okay. Immediately, he relaxes. It's quiet for a moment as Simon traces his thumb over your paper thin skin.

"A dog, a new house, babies, anything you want. I'll give you anything you want, just get better for me, baby." Simon pleads, a hint of vulnerability tracing his words. It's one of only a few times he's begged you. 

"I don't want a future without you in it. I want my wife. I want our kids terrorizing the place, I want to get old and retire the Force with you. Hell, I'd turn in my letter of resignation today if you asked, just please, fight for me, love."

The tears are falling freely now, you don't try to stop them. Guilt fills your being at the realization of everything you've put your husband through for the past few months. Through it all, he's never left your side. He's still here. Kissing closed your wounds, and promising to plant flowers in their place. 

A soft kiss is pressed to your forehead before amber eyes peek down at you through blonde eyelashes. You chew on your lip, a bad habit. 

Your resolve is set, and even though your body shrieks for the opposite, you'll get through this. You have to. 

You have Sunday mornings to look forward to, lazily pouring Simon a cup of tea in his favorite mug. You have a house to buy, with two bedrooms instead of one. Dragging Simon through the shops and picking out all the different onesies he'll let you bring home. You have walks through the park to go on. You have to pick up takeout on Simon's late nights at work. You have to sit on his desk while you share an entree and talk to him until he forgets about the paperwork he's supposed to be doing. So many little actions to go through, little memories to make. You can't give it up. You won't. 

There is so much to fight for, so much to hope for, all given to you by the man before you. Tears sting your eyes again as you finally speak up. 

"I promise you, Simon. I'll fight. For us, I will."

[zbis]

☆.｡.:*summary : your boyfriend comes home bruised and bloody yet again

☆.｡.:*pairing : boxer!gunwook x reader

☆.｡.:*warnings & other : blood, mentions of fighting, a bit of angst if you squint(?), fluff, not revised

☆.｡.:*w/c : ~1k

“stupid fucking-” gunwook groans out loud. “such a lucky hit, i swear...” he taps his finger on the marble surface of the kitchen island contemplatively. “i was just distracted,” he tells himself.

he places his head on the counter, mulling over the loss of the night. god, if only he did a left hook instead of the right. 

“ow..” he lifts head up and looks down, noticing his forehead wound has opened back up and has left a blood stain on the counter. “shit,” he mumbles. just as he’s about to go grab a towel to clean it up, you emerge from your room. 

“you’re back?” you yawn, your hair looking just a dishealved as his.

he clears his throat, diverting his gaze awkwardly from your exposed torso when you stretch. “yeah..” he mumbles. you laugh at how red his ears get until you notice the forehead wound among many others. you see his blood stained cheeks and eye that's just asking to get swollen if untreated. “gunwook what the fuck?” you scold him. “i-” you cut him off when you notice the stain he left on the counter. “and you’re leaving your blood everywhere!”

he scoffs, “ i was just about to clean that up..” he sighs, “im not really in the mood for this right now..” just then do you notice the way his eyes are downturned and his usual bubbly self is nowhere to be found. 

“did you-”

you dont finish your sentence because the way hes carrying himself tells you everything already. “oh wook..” you walk up to him and cup his face gently, although he still winces at the touch. “it’s just one loss you know?” he sighs, “i was gonna use the money to take you out or something, we haven't done anything fun in months.”

 “i dont care about that, you’ve done alot for me already plus i dont want you to die while making me happy.”

you dont even need to ask questions to know. gunwook typically never fought past his range. he would only go against people whom he knew he had a good chance against. however, every saturday there was an event where the fighters of the area could go against one of the strongest fighters in the city. the cash prize was good but what was even better was the reputation that came with it and your boyfriend wanted nothing more than to have it.

you were supportive but for the past 4 months, every Saturday without fail, gunwook would come home beat to a pulp. you tried to get him to give up but he was determined to win one day, he just had to get stronger.

you sigh, looking over his face. his lips were more swollen than normal and some strands of his dark hair were crisp with blood. “can you just-” “of course.” you cut him off. you place a chaste kiss on his lips, which he hisses in pain at and you laugh.

you silently lead him to the bathrooom where you keep a first aid kit on deck. you grunt as you pick up the heavy box, refusing to let gunwook help you. “just sit your ass down.” when he does you give him a once over.

he looks like a stray puppy who’d just been abandoned at the side of the road. you let out an exasperated sigh at his appearance, “you know, im not a licensed nurse. you need to go to the hospital one of these days.” he plays with his fingers while you get the kit ready for use. 

“why would i do that when i have my own personal fixer upper right here?” he jabs at your side playfully. “ow, it hurts when you do it.” you glare at him with an annoyed but light smile. 

“too strong.” 

“not strong enough apparently,” he mumbles, once again reminded of yet another saturday loss. “well,” you take place on his lap with a cotton pad wet with alcohol in hand. instinctively he moves his hand to your waist to keep you steady. “you’re strong enough to keep me safe,” you whisper.

before he can protest or say anything demeaning about himself you place the cotton on the cut closest to his eye. he hisses in pain and glares at you. “be gentler,” he mumbles. you hum, moving the piece of cotton across whatever cut or gash you came across, making sure to change it whenever it got too saturated with blood.

 “seriously though...you need to be more careful wook,” you place a kiss on the cut you just cleaned and place a bandaid over that. “my biggest fear is getting a call about a wound I won’t be able to fix.”

he nods solemnly, placing his patched up face on your shoulder. you sigh, choosing to play with his hair to soothe his stress and sadness.

after a couple beats of silence, he suddenly pips up.

"but next saturday i've definitely got it in the bag!"