#'it's like making out with a chocolate bar but you can tell they've been making out with a strawberry right before you--

[vamp-a-day]

day 59

i think the strawberry in their jam is like the iron in our blood

[woso-dreamzzz]

End of the World VII

Ruesha Littlejohn x Child!Reader

Summary: You spend the day with Ma

After the trip to the zoo in Australia, you find yourself going to the zoo regularly.

Most of the time, it's London Zoo but today Ma has driven you out for nearly two hours to Whipsnade Zoo because they have red pandas and those are your favourite.

Her teammates are coming too but that's okay because you know Ma will keep you safe.

It's meant to be Mammy's week, you think as Ma keeps you in the car while she tries to unfold the pram. But seeing Mammy on Monday gave you a weird icky feeling in your tummy.

She's been in Ibiza through the week, partying and having fun in a different country. It had been weird seeing her again.

She was still the same Mammy. She looked the same. She smelt the same. She acted the same but, still, you got a bit of a weird feeling looking at her and you didn't settle in easily your first night with her and cried and cried and cried for Ma so they've swapped around the schedule to give Ma this week.

Next week, you'll try again with Mammy.

But, this week, you're with Rue and she lifts you into your pram with one of your felt dolls.

"You feel okay?" She runs a hand over your cheek and you giggle a little at the ticklish feeling.

"Yes, Ma."

"And promise me you'll tell me if you need the toilet?"

Your head bobs. "I will."

A kiss is pressed to the top of your head. "You're a good girl."

You giggle, kicking your legs out a little.

Most of Ma's teammates are already inside so Ma buys tickets quickly and goes in.

You let Rue push you around for most of the day but emerge from the pram to stand between her and Georgia and look at the red pandas.

They're very pretty and they're your favourite animal.

You've got a few of them as little figures for your Barbie zoo set but nothing beats seeing them in rea life.

They clamber all over their enclosure and Ma lifts you up onto her hip so you can see me clearly.

It's easy for Rue to hold you up while also digging around her bag for a snack, ripping open the packaging of the chocolate bar and taking a bite.

She offers you the next bite and you chew mindlessly as you stare as one of the animals misjudges a jump and goes tumbling down the ramp.

You giggle as the second red panda jumps onto the first.

"They're silly, Ma," You say and Rue beams at you.

"Silly? Are they?"

"Uh-huh."

"Do you want to move on yet?"

You glance back at the funny red pandas and your jumper cuff somehow makes its way into your mouth.

It's a bad habit but it's never been Rue's first choice of habits to break you out of. Your bed wetting issue is much more pressing than chewing your cuffs.

Chewing your cuffs is probably the bottom of the ladder, under getting you to get rid of those creepy porcelain dolls your grandma gave you and getting you to speak without mumbling.

"We can stay a bit longer here, if you want," Rue says and you nod.

Most of her teammates go off to do their own things but Georgia stays to keep you both company as Rue walks around the fence of the red panda enclosure with you secure in her arms.

"Ma," You say suddenly when you finally allow yourself to be taken to the other animals.

Rue doesn't hear you, pushing your pram and talking to Georgia next to her.

"Ma."

The pram keeps moving and you wiggle a little in your seat, tears already welling in your eyes.

"Ma!"

You don't have a loud voice even when you shout but Rue's in tune to your noises most of the time and she definitely hears you now.

"What's up, Kiddo? What's going on?"

You whine. kicking your legs out. "Potty, Ma. I need the potty."

"Can you-?"

Georgia nods as Rue unclips you quickly. "I can stay with the pram."

Even though you've told Rue that you need the toilet, she knows you've left it to the last minute like always.

You've probably needed it for a little while now, hoping that the feeling would go away so Rue hightails it to the toilets.

She sets you up on the sink once you're done and helps you with your hands.

"Do you want to have lunch here?" She asks, scrubbing your hands," Or we can go home?"

You'd been at the zoo since it opened and Rue can see how easily your eyes are growing heavy.

"Mmm."

Your cuff is straight back at your mouth and Rue gently pulls it down so she can hear your mumbles properly.

"I know," She says," It's already been a long day. Naps at home sounds great, huh?"

You head bobs up and down in a nod as you're hoisted back up onto Rue's hip again and taken over to where Georgia's waiting.

"Red panda!" You gasp and Rue's eyes go wide.

"You didn't."

"I so did," Georgia replies with a grin, holding up the massive red panda toy she must have gotten from the gift shop...or stolen, Rue was never quite sure with Georgia.

"You couldn't have gotten her a doll?" Rue pretends to scold as you're strapped into your pram with the toy.

"Well, now that you've mentioned it. There was this amazing porcelain one that-"

"Never mind."

[tumbleringismycopingmechanism]

I love how on the one hand, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005) is really good, but on the other hand sometimes it really confuses its messages. So here's my way-too-deep dive into the movie that noone actually asked for:

The parenting messages:

Showing that bad parenting will fuck kids up, with different examples for what counts as bad parenting and the respective different results of the bad parenting styles.

Showing that ultimately, the kids will be the ones to pay for the parents' mistakes in raising them. They are the ones who get punished, and if you apply it to real life, they are the ones who'll have to live with the ways they've been raised and how it affects them.

Showing that the parents are first and foremost the ones who need to learn, not the kids. In the end, the kids don't seem overly troubled or changed from the experience, but you can see the parents start to change their parenting.

Only half of the songs even mention that it's the parents' fault that the kid is like this. Mostly they just preoccupy themselves with shaming the kids.

The way Augustus gets punished makes no sense. That's mostly because they felt the need to push for a fatphobic message before anything else (more on that below). But being fat is not a character flaw. His character flaw is that he's greedy/doesn't know how to share. This is only shown very briefly unfortunately, but that's at least an actual flaw. Now, being greedy/unable to share doesn't necessarily mean not listening to anyone when they tell you not to do something, but that's basically how his punishment comes on. He doesn't listen to Wonka or his mother when told to go away from the chocolate river, falls in, almost drowns, gets humiliated for his body in front of everyone and sucked into a mashine that carries him off. Maybe instead you could have him wanting to try more and more of the things in the factory, wandering further and further along and getting lost. Or maybe he interrupts the Oompa-Loompas' work by selfishly putting the stuff they're reaping into his own pockets and is consequently punished in some way.

The way Violet gets punished makes sense because she's raised to be an over-achiever especially when it comes to chewing bubble gum. You can see after every action of hers she looks to her mother for approval, and her mother does cheer her on when she takes the gum that turns her into a blueberry. However, it also doesn't make sense because throughout the entire film until that point, Violet and her mother tried to make sure they were the best candidad for the special prize and they are acting against Wonka's repeated instructions here, which seems very counter-intuitive to reaching that goal. Also, once again the song completely misses the point and decides the punishment is for liking gum instead of their hyper-focus on Being The Best.

The way Veruca gets punished makes sense as a consequence for her upbringing. Her parents buy her everything she asks for, so she never learned how to deal with a No. So when she is faced with one regarding the squirrels, of course she ignores it, because she's used to eventually getting everything she asks for. Her being attacked is a logical consequence of that.

The way Mike gets punished makes sense. He has two fatal flaws: thinking he knows everything and extreme violence. His punishment is mainly for the former, not thinking through that if the chocolate bar gets smaller, he would too. However, I think the one that should have been the focus of his punishment would be the latter. Violence is a lot more harmful than being a know-it-all, and also he's actually correct about everything he says in the TV room. He figured out how to get a ticket with just Maths. I feel like he has a pretty good reason to think of himself as smart. The song here is once again unlogical, claiming that kids should stay away from TV and videogames because they make them stupid. But Mike isn't stupid. He's impulsive and aggressive (supposedly because of the videogames). That's not the same.

Wonka's position is contradictory in itself. On one hand, he seems to want to punish the parents so they get better at parenting. But on the other hand he hates parents who tell you what to do and do, you know, other good parenting stuff. None of the kids (except maybe Violet, who was not seeing that way) had a problem because their parents had too many rules or demanded too much.

After 4 depictions of how different forms of neglect of your child* have a bad influence on your child, the relationship of the Wonkas shows that the opposite (overprotectivness) can be just as bad.

(* Calling them all neglect is probably a misuse of the word, however I mean it in a way that there's always something lacking instead of too much of something. Augustus is never taught charitableness, Violetta is never taught how to deal with defeat or how to figure out what she wants herself (instead of just excelling in what her mother expects of her), Veruca is never taught how to deal with a No and never shown love outside of material possesions, Mike is never shown boundaries or taught how to deal with his aggression in a healthy way. Meanwhile Wilbur cares too much about what his son eats and is overly protective about Willy's dental hygiene.)

Depicturing capitalism:

The wealthy billionaire (aka Wonka) is completely out of touch with the real world.

The wealthy billionaire doesn't give two shits about destroying the property of people so poor they can barely survive, as seen by him just crushing through the Buckets' roof with his glass lift.

The wealthy billionaire employs cheap labour from workers who completely depend on him because it saves him money (in this case not (primarily) because he wants to keep workers' paychecks as small as possible, but because employing locals means his recipes might get stolen and if people can buy the same stuff from other stores, he doesn't control the market anymore and might lose revenue).

He doesn't care for the labour his factory provides. He used to have locals working for him, and by the size of his factory, a not small amount of the locals must have depended on their jobs there. He dismisses all of them overnight, single-handedly creating an explosion of unemployment in the area, without a care. Something that as we see with Charlie's family still has consequences even decades later.

It fuels into the narrative that billionaires deserve their wealth because they're actually geniuses.

It gives the illusion that billionaires actually give a fuck about the shit they produce. Wonka is really passionate about his sweets and even long after his succesfull take-off at the world market he still creates all the recipes. The only hint against this narrative is that he produces at least some products (like the bubblegum) simply for the money, despite not actually liking them.

He will test unsafe products on his workers and when there are unpleasant side-effects, they'll just have to live with it.

He's mad at Mike for cheating to get the ticket, but not at Veruca. That's because Veruca's way of cheating made him tons of profit while Mike's way of cheating gained him only one sold chocolate bar.

However, I think most/all of the points that actually show how bad capitalism is were unintentional in doing so. The movie doesn't try to say capitalism/billionaires are bad, it just happens to do so. Half of these points are either played for laughs, minor background moments or things you have to think about and put together to notice. Most noticably, the Buckets' poverty is framed as a hardship to overcome at best and a virtue that makes Charlie the most worthy of the children at worst. If the movie was actually trying to take a stance against capitalism/billionaires, I think this wouldn't be the case.

Other noteworthy stuff:

As mentioned above, the treatment of Augustus is insanely fatphobic. It starts with grandfather George predicting that the first winner will be "fat, fat, fat". The way he says it implies that fatness is moraly wrong - which it isn't. Also, what he actually means is that the first winner will probably really love chocolate, which does not need to correlate with body shape whatsoever. Then there's the scene in the factory where they make a proper pig of him, completely dehumanizing him, covering his entire face with food, putting him on the ground, even making him eat grass. And to really hammer home the fat hatred, he gets stuck in the tube and the Oompa-Loompas (at least in the German version of the lyrics, which are the only ones I've ever heared) sing about him being a "disgusting blob of fat".

The racism regarding the Oompa-Loompas. Of course their poor tribe just doesn't know how to make delicious edible food and has to rely on a random white guy teaching them better. Of course they will gladly do what's basically slave-work (as they are not paid except in cocoa beans), somehow made even worse because it's implied that if they ever wanted to leave the factory, it would be really bad for them because they can't deal with cold climate, so they're basically forced to remain in the factory. Paired with their love for singing during work it really seems like it's trying to portrait the slave trade through rose-coloured glasses.

It would have been nice to see what exactly makes Charlie's parents a perfect middle between too absent and too present, too uncaring and too controling. Because the way it's framed their parenting is good because... they're poor? I guess? Which is bullshit, poor parents are not automatically good parents.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for calling out my bf for wanting to buy his female work colleague a small "just because" gift?

=======================

So, I have been with my current bf for about 1.5 years. It's a pretty serious relationship and we do love each other. Over the weekend, we were at a local mall and he noticed a kiosk selling some different kinds of anime merch. He's a big anime fan and has mentioned that there is only a small handful of other anime fans at work so he only has a few people he can talk about these things with. Anyway, while at the kiosk, he mentioned enthusiastically that he 'absolutely had' to come back there to get a sticker for a girl he works with because he knows she's a huge fan of a particular anime (that he saw a sticker for there).

Of course, I hear this and immediately think oh how thoughtful. That's really sweet.. but then realized he had never done such a thing for me. I never thought of gifting as my primary love language, but the realization of this really stung. I made a comment about him buying gifts for his girlies at work, and he got a little defensive about it and we left it at that for a moment.

I brought it up a few hours later to let him know how I felt. I wanted him to know that he had never randomly bought me something just because I'd like it, just because it was related to something I was really into. He'd never randomly brought home a 'just because' gift like that but he was totally going to do that for her (his coworker). He'd certainly never bought me a sticker from some show or anime *I'm* into...I asked if he'd buy his male anime fan coworkers a sticker too and he said of course. But that's not what he said at the mall. He only mentioned getting one for her and the particular anime she was into. I asked him where MY sticker was out of all the things he knows I'm into. "Where's my sticker?" and he said nothing.

So later in the night, we did talk about it and he apologized afterward because he said he didn't realize how I would interpret him buying her a gift. But I said I still feel like you're missing a point. I told him: what does it look like for a guy to bring a girl he works with little trinkets of things that she's int?. It's a personal gift. It's not a bar of chocolate that "all women" would like. It is an anime sticker of something that you'd have to know she was into. He could have just said where the kiosk was, but he wanted to get her something. Something that shows he payed attention to the things she likes. And he wanted to give it to her because he thought she'd like it = to make her happy. I asked him to think about how that looks like to everyone involved. And is that the message you wanted to send? I asked him to think about how she would interpret it. And what does that look like to me? They've only known each other (at work) for a few months. I said you don't know how she would interpret that. All she knows is you were out with your girlfriend, and you were thinking of her enough to buy her something. And that could sent the wrong message to her of course, even if you "didn't mean" anything by it.

So he apologized again, said he wasn't trying to court her by buying her a sticker, and it was just a random thought that appeared in his head when he saw the anime she liked. And he said he didn't think about it the way I described and that he agreed with me - just telling her where the kiosk was and that was enough and appropriate. But something still doesn't sit right with me. Maybe I feel guilty for blowing things out of proportion? Maybe there's something else going on here that my gut knows that my brain hasn't seen yet? Maybe i'm just jealous because he hasn't ever brought me a 'just because' gift ever?

Am I the asshole?

What are these acronyms?

[verdemoun]

how does lenny feel about how he’s treated in this time period, in contrast to 1899?

honestly lenny's attitude towards race in rdr2 like he has so many brilliant dialogues about his relationship to race like UGH esp in lemoyne like it's genuinely not fair how aware he has to be of his race at such a young age but also I am definitely not the person to be saying things have improved or how things have changed fully aware it's a conversation people still have to have with kids!! how is the world so beautiful and frustratingly embarrassingly ugly at the same time. the conversation he has with sean about being 'set free to suffer' haunts me honestly. at times his monologues are so much an echo of the same anger dutch has with the way of the world but coming from a place of genuine oppression instead of idealistic bullshit UGH their conversations about evelyn miller and pretty words got me exorcist crawling backwards i love lenny so much

on one hand lenny would be so excited about seeing black professionals. walking around college/university campuses, talking to black professors, fellow students of color, the sheer concept of what and where he can study and achieve not being a matter of written laws or rules would still be so exciting. having intellectual debates with fellow pocs with lived experience instead of idealists, being able to find community in a way that wasn't assessable as a young man in 1899 surrounded by a mostly white gang (lenny almost always makes a point of saying he was talking to other* colored** folk in missions you cannot tell me he isn't looking for that sense of poc community)

but he's already been necessitated by life to be so aware of glances, suspicious looks he recognizes and receives all the same despite being in a completely different era. he just gets to a point like tamatoa voice: mwahahaha, yes!! social progress, people freed from connotations and burdens of their own sk- wait a minute ugh i see they've taken an explicitly racially motivated bias and reframed it as socio-economic challenge reinforced by the abuse and mismanagement of powers within the judicial system, as a DIVERSION (to the fact there still isn't enough being done to actively address it!!).

will call out people being racist in the local corner store in the flattest most bored monotone like seriously in the time you were following me around because i'm black those two (vague gesture to isaac and jack sprinting away) stole 3 energy drinks, a bag of chips, an entire case of chocolate bars and the damned cctv video surveillance in operation warning sign

[bitchyfoxymama]

Who The Hell Is Moon Knight? - Moon boys x F!Avenger!Reader

Warnings: talks of the blip, Thanos, Tony, Natasha and Steve's Deaths, crying, brief mention of Jake, sorry if I make a part 2 he will he a bigger part of it. Not beta read!

A/n: ahh finally its done! I've had this one in my notebook ideas for weeks! So glad I finished it finally thanks to my wonderful friend @jupitersmoon167 who helped me co write this when I had hit writers block!

It’s been about a year since everything happened. A year gone without Tony, Natasha and especially Steve. Steve had been the first one to become friends with you when you first joined the Avengers. His leaving hurt you the most since he never gave you a proper goodbye.

You decided it was time for a fresh start, you all scattered really especially with the Sokovia accords having been recently overturned. You want to gather your thoughts and reevaluate what life might lead you too. If you could even call yourself an avenger still or if you would turn towards a life of being a vigilante like those you've heard of in Hell's Kitchen.

London is where your crisis sent you, you'd always wanted to visit but this visit had turned into a few weeks which turned into a permanent residence in London, just a few blocks from the local history museum.

It was a crisp March night when you were walking home from dinner, it was late, none of the buses were running for the rest of the night and you decided it would be better to just walk than spend money on an uber.

You could hear laughing in the distance as you were about to pass a bar.

You grip your purse a little tighter as you begin to pass. You don't want to have to cause a scene here, especially since you just want to lay low.

“Oi, what's a pretty dame like you doing out ‘ere all alone” one of the drunk men asks while stepping out into your path.

You kept your head down, you didn't want to engage with them. Just keep walking and you'll be fine, you tell yourself in your head. You continue walking however you notice that they've begun to follow you close behind.

“Hey! My friend here was talking to you! He deserves a response” another one says as he shoves you into the alley just past the bar.

“Look, I don't want any trouble, I just want to get home. Now if you let me, i'd really appreciate it” You say with you back to the brick wall.

“Well, looks like trouble found you after all, little darling,” the man who first called out to you spoke again, getting close enough for you to smell his alcohol ridden breath. You could feel the blade press closer to your neck, nicking the skin. You can feel the warmth of the blood trickling down your neck.

Your palm is against the brick wall and you can already feel the vines growing around you.

“I really didn't want to have to do this but you've left me no choice,” you begin to bring your hand up when another person joins you in the alley. This one dressed head to toe like a mummy with a cape and hood to match, a golden waning crescent on his chest.

He pulls a blade from his chest and throws it at the one who had just previously had the knife to your throat. The blade hits the knife causing him to drop it. You turn your attention to the other man who is about to hit the man in white. You cause a vine to wrap around his leg and pull, causing him to fall on his back, knocking him out in the process.

You turn to see the man in white knock out the other guy before he walks over to you. Before you have time to think or even wrap the mummy man in a vine he already has you in his arms and he's flying into the night sky.

When your feet touch solid ground once more, you are on a rooftop somewhere. You quickly push yourself out of his arms.

“And who the fuck are you?” you ask, once again bringing out vines from your palms.

He removes his hood and mask to reveal a rather handsome man with chocolate brown eyes.

“Uh Moon Knight?” he raised an eyebrow, shocked and a bit offended you've never heard of them.

“Who the hell is Moon Knight?” You give him a death glare, ready to fight once more when he changes appearances and facial expressions in the blink of an eye, this time he's wearing an all white three piece suit.

“Wait, I know you! You're bloody Mother Nature! You're an Avenger!” Steven says excitedly.

His excitement causes a blush to rise on your cheeks. Who the fuck was this guy seriously.

'Wait, Steven are you saying we saved someone who could have saved themselves?' Marc asks from the headspace.

'And she is gorgeous, and can kick ass? Hermano, ask her on a date.' Jake says coming out to see the ruckus.

“Yeah, so you know that I can kick your ass?” you say as you wrap his legs in vines.

“Wait a minute, time out.” Steven bargains creating the time out symbol with his hands, “Why don't we all just chill the F out.”

You stare at him, confused, before you are able another word he changes his accent back to an american one.

“Look, we don't want to fight you. We are the Avatars of Khonshu. We protect the travelers of the night. We thought you were in need of our help,” He begins to explain, only confusing you more.

“Let me stop you right there, why do you switch accents and keep saying us? Are there more of you so-called avatars?” you say quickly looking around.

“No, we-well I have DID, Dissociative Identity Disorder, and Steven, he’s british. There is one other. His name is Jake, they're both co conscious with me right now,” He explains further, hope is in his eyes, hope that you believe him.

“I see. Okay, well it was swell to meet you,” you begin, bringing the vines from around his legs back to you.

“Marc, Marc Spector,” He sticks out his hand.

You shake it, his grip releases as his costume changes once more to a black and white style and he brings your knuckles to his lips.

“Hola, mi bonita mujer. My name is Jake Lockley,” you raise an eyebrow and the suave man.

“Flattery won’t get you far Lockley,” you smirk.

“Oh i like you,” he says smirking back before his expression changes into a sweet faced one and his costume changing back to the white three piece suit.

“Hello love, I’m Steven Grant. Huge fan of your work,” He gushes, causing a blush to creep up your neck.

You are about to speak again when the cold london breeze passes through you causing you to shiver. Steven is quicke to put his suit’s jacket over your shoulders.

“Would you like to come back to our flat for some tea?" Steven insists.

'Yes Hermano ask her back then we can play the long game' Jake says from inside the head space.

"I almost kicked your ass and you want me to come back home with you for tea? Hmm why not, I don't have friends here. But let me tell you boys. You try anything and I won't hesitate to wrap you up in vines,"

'Oooo I like her so much more now,' Jake smirks

'She sure is something else' Marc replies.

*****

Steven hands you a cup of tea while you sit on their worn couch. Many nights were spent on this couch due to Jake falling asleep watching the Yankees play.

“Thank you,” you took a sip of the tea, “So I guess you are wondering what an Avenger is doing in London?” You say looking up at Steven.

“We are but we don't want to pressure you into telling us darling. I know we just met.” He gives you a gentle smile.

“After Thanos happened, I was lost. I lost a lot of people, I was snapped away, so imagine my frustration and sadness to come back only to lose my family all over again. We all scattered, currently trying to rebuild and I just ran. I haven't had contact with any of them and it became too much too fast." tears fall from your eyes, you cough to try and cover up your tears. Steven surprises you, he wraps you in his arms around you and pulls you into a tight hug.

When the two of you pull away you see a shift in his person, "I-we have baggage too. Not Avenger level baggage but baggage nonetheless," Marc speaks as he pulls back. You can tell there is more but you don't want to push it as you have just met them.

"You could use a friend while your here for however long that may be, and if you ever need a partner or help taking down the bad guys you always have us," he says with a small smile. You return one. You continue drinking your tea as you notice Marc doesn't drink.

"Not a big tea drinker, Spector?" You say over your cup.

He lets out a hearty chuckle, "more of a black coffee drinker," he says finally leaning forward to take a sip of tea grimacing as it hits his tongue, "Yeah definitely prefer coffee."

You nearly choke on your own tea at his reaction. This is what you had missed most after you came back. Hopefully life here in London with a fellow vigilante wouldn't be so bad.

"So why exactly do you dress like a mummy?"

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Just Another Day

Hey uhh… I’m not sure if my ask is mighty enough for the god of writing requests to see it but could you write a fic where everyone forgets or is too busy for Roman’s birthday? I’m totally not projecting… but the only way I know how to cope is to hurt my boy, bonus points if it doesn’t end with a surprise party – anon

Read on Ao3

Warnings: roman's birthday is forgotten and janus and virgil are kinda dicks

Pairings: none

Word Count: 3272

That's the funny thing about birthdays, isn't it?

To everyone else, it's just another day.

Roman wakes up, a smile already forming on his face.

Happy birthday, he thinks as he sits up, patting the red comforter and pillows, happy birthday!

After all, these are his creations, it's only fair that he wishes them a happy birthday as well. Although, he supposes technically their birthday would be when he created them, but it's just easier and more fun if they all celebrate together, right?

He quickly goes through his morning routine, putting on his prince costume and going to his makeup box. What does he feel like today, of all days, should he do the gold sparkle or the red sparkle? Or—oh, even better! The red sparkly as eye shadow and the gold sparkle as an enhancement to his blush! Yes, he's gotten a brand-new blush just for today, Virgil helped him pick it out, he can take a little bit of the gold shimmer and dust it over the top.

He can't stop grinning at himself in the mirror, oh, yes, he will be doing this look more often. He strikes his signature pose and—perfect!

A quick run-through of his fingers and his hair is artfully tousled, double-check that everything on his costume is right, and he's ready to go!

Oh, what is it they'll be preparing? A family breakfast? He does like getting to see everyone in the morning, maybe they'll all be down there already? Or a trip to the Imagination, he may or may not have been brushing up on some of the places he knows all of them love for just such an occasion. Or maybe they'll be baking! He hasn't had homemade desserts in forever, and now that he's started thinking about it, he can't get the taste of fresh chocolate chip cookies out of his head, or fresh flaky biscuits, or lemon bars…

Oh, he's made himself quite hungry.

As he strides to his door, he catches sight of his wide smile in the mirror.

"Happy birthday," he whispers to his reflection, and closes the door behind him.

***

    2.

He quickly rules out a family breakfast together, because the only one downstairs when he reaches the kitchen is Patton.

"Good morning!"

"Oh, goodness!" Patton startles, nearly dropping the spatula he's holding. "Roman, don't do that!"

"Sorry, dear Patton-cake," he says, swooping in to kiss his cheek, "just excited this morning!"

"I can see that."

Some part of Roman registers that Patton sounds far more annoyed than he does endeared, but it's lost in the tidal wave of it's my birthday! "What's on the menu this morning, Pat?"

"Well, I'm making an omelet." Sure enough, the eggy-cheesy-vegetable-y mess in the pan goes splat as Patton flips it over. "I don't know what you're going to have."

Oh. "I don't…really like omelets."

"I know, that's why this isn't for you."

Well, that definitely rules out breakfast. "Never fear! I will devise something else as equally delicious to me to have!"

Only with all of their eggs going into the omelet, there won't be enough left to bake anything else. Unless they've gotten more eggs in between last night when he checked the fridge and this morning, but he doubts it.

"Toast," he says triumphantly as Patton plates his omelet and—goes to leave the kitchen? "The breakfast of champions."

Yeah, Patton barely glances over his shoulder as he leaves, calling out: "Sure is, kiddo, good for you."

Roman frowns as Patton vanishes to the living room, hearing the tell-tale clink of the plate against the table as Patton sits down for his own breakfast. He looks back at the toaster, with its two slices of unassuming bread that are—smoking?

"Shit," he mutters, under his breath so Patton won't hear him, hitting the button and wincing as the two shriveled black husks pop up. He grabs a paper towel and disposes them, before deciding that it's his birthday, he can conjure up an English muffin to toast if he wants to.

"Roman," Patton calls just as he goes to toast it, "you're not summoning food in there, are you?"

"But—"

"We have rules about that, kiddo, you remember what happened last time."

"But it's just an English muffin, and my toast got—"

"Rules are rules, kiddo, it's not fair to everyone else if you get to break it. Besides, I know we have more bread."

But it's my birthday, he wants to say, but he can hear that Patton's already made his mind up, so he sighs and throws the English muffin out too. Oh, well, he'll just have to make sure these slices don't burn.

Chin up, he tells himself as he plates his slightly-less burned toast, it's still my birthday!

***

    3.

Trip to the Imagination is also quickly ruled out when Patton is long gone and no one else has arrived downstairs. That's…well, that's not great, but it is okay; he manages to watch a few of the videos he's been meaning to for a while before he gets up and goes in search of someone else.

Logan, maybe, what about Logan?

With another smile growing on his face, he bounds up the stairs. Oh, they could have a brainstorm! They could bounce ideas off each other just like they used to, they could spend the day watching one of the shows they'd been meaning to watch and critique it—there was this new movie that came out just a few weeks ago that they'd both said related to their individual projects—

By the time he reaches the outside of Logan's door, he's practically vibrating with excitement. He knocks—shave and a haircut, two bits—and waits, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

"Yes?"

"Logan!"

He thinks he hears Logan sigh but that must just be his chair or his notebook or something. "What is it, Roman, I'm in the middle of something."

"Oh. I, um, I had a question."

"Well, there's no use yelling through the door."

Is that—was that an invitation to come in? He can never tell with Logan anymore. "Can I come in?"

"That was the implication of what I just said, wasn't it?"

Roman carefully opens the door, smiling when Logan looks up—only for it to dim a moment later when Logan looks far more irritated than he'd expected. "Um—hi."

"What's the question?"

"There's, um, that movie that we were talking about came out a few weeks ago."

"That doesn't sound like a question."

"I was wondering if you—if you wanted to watch it?"

"For movie night?"

"N-no, just—just us. I miss talking about things with you."

"You do?" Logan eyes him skeptically over his glasses—his skepticles, Roman calls them in his head and fights not to laugh at his own joke. "When, next week?"

"I was, um, hoping we could do it today?"

Logan sighs, and it's definitely unmistakably a sigh this time, and turns back to his desk. "Roman, I'm busy today. We'll have to work it out later."

"But I—"

"No, Roman. We can watch something tonight at movie night, but I'm afraid I don't have time right now."

"…okay."

Roman closes Logan's door and sighs. Well, that's okay. He can hardly expect Logan to want to change his schedule for him, and he'd thought—well, he was mistaken about whether or not Logan was going to be part of the birthday morning. He'll see him this evening, like he said! That's gonna be really fun.

…really fun.

***

    4.

He runs into Janus and Virgil in the hallway and they both burst out laughing.

He blinks, caught off-guard, a small smile forming on his face as he tries to get the joke, only for Janus to look at him again and he only laughs harder.

"Oh, god, thank you, Princey," Virgil gasps, leaning against the wall for support, "I needed that."

"Needed…what?"

"That." Virgil gestures to his face. "You're funnier than we give you credit for, that's—whoa, that's great."

Janus, who is still laughing, just manages to say the words 'glitter clown' before he's off again, nearly sliding down the wall with how hard he's laughing.

Oh.

Oh.

A sick feeling starts twisting in Roman's stomach as they both start to come down from their laughter, still giggling. Virgil flaps a hand at him.

"You gotta warn me before you do something like that, man, I almost broke a rib."

"Have you been taking lessons from Remus?" A different hurt lances through him at Janus's words. "That's terrifying."

"How did you even do that, did you just shove your face into a bunch of glitter?"

"No."

"What," Janus laughs again, and it's not meant to be cruel—he hopes it's not meant to be cruel but it hurts worse than it did before, "did you wake up and decide to smear glitter all over your face for no reason?"

Then they realize he's not laughing.

"Oh," Janus says first, trying and failing miserably at keeping a straight face—and not just for the obvious reason— "oh, um…did you—did it not come off?"

"Yeah, did you, like, try and wash it off and then it stained? That can happen with some of the less expensive brands—"

"I know that."

"Shit, uh, yeah, I know." Virgil scratches the back of his head. "I, uh, I've got some more heavy-duty makeup remover if you wanna try it—"

"It's fine."

"No, no, I'm sorry, Princey, I shouldn't have laughed so much, I know it was a mistake—" Virgil reaches for him— "lemme help you get it off—"

"It's fine," he mutters through gritted teeth and pushes past them. He doesn't even make it out of earshot before he hears them start laughing again.

He bursts back into his room and storms to the bathroom, ignoring the burning in his face as he fumbles blindly for his makeup remover—which is plenty strong, thank you very much—and scrubs at his face until the cotton pads fall apart. His prince costume is quickly soaked as he splashes water across his face, dripping down his neck and arms to the cuffs and collar. He keeps going, not minding how raw his face starts to feel, not until he knows for damn sure that every little speck of glitter is gone.

Screw them.

Screw them.

It's his birthday, and if they're all going to be absolute jackwagons then he's going to go into the Imagination and enjoy himself all on his own.

***

    5.

When he gets downstairs for movie night and sees them all there, looking at him, for one second, he thinks it might be a surprise party.

Then Logan adjusts his glasses and says: "Roman. You're late."

That last little ember of hope in his chest splutters and dies.

"Sorry," he mumbles, slinking over to the empty spot on the far side of the mattress and taking a pillow, "got distracted in the Imagination."

"Hey, at least you got all that glitter off you."

"Oh, good, I was wondering what that was about."

He wraps his arms around the pillow and tries not to think about how cold to the touch it is. "Yeah."

"Alright," Remus says, clapping his hands, "movie time!"

"What are we watching," Virgil asks, grabbing the remote and beginning to scroll through the various options, "are we going action, funny, mystery, animated…?"

Roman perks his head up a little. "Can we watch Love, Simon?"

"We've already seen that, Princey."

"Yeah, but—"

"What about The Meg?" Remus nudges Logan's side. "The sequel's coming out soon and we could get ready for it!"

"Wait, is that the giant shark one?"

"Yeah!"

"I suppose that's a good idea," Logan says and Roman's grip tightens on the pillow, "to prepare. I can only imagine how ridiculous the science of the sequel is going to be."

"Oh, you and I are gonna have a field day."

Roman's chest burns. "But we've seen that one already too."

"Sequel, Ro-Bro," Remus says without even looking at him, "there's gonna be a sequel."

"You've picked a lot recently," Patton adds, giving him a scolding look, "you can let Remus choose."

"But—"

"But nothing," Janus says smoothly, "Virgil, did you find it?"

"Yep!"

The Meg starts playing.

Logan puts his arm around Remus.

Patton starts playing with Remus's hair.

Janus whispers something that makes Remus chuckle and they start doing one of their inside jokes.

Virgil looks at Remus and smiles softly.

Roman is cold.

During one of the big shark fight scenes, he puts the pillow back on the couch and sinks out.

He curls up on his bed and pulls his red comforter—heh—snugly around his chin. He catches sight of himself in the mirror and pointedly turns away.

Happy birthday, he scoffs internally as he feels the tears well up, what a stupid thing.

***

    +1.

The Imagination remembered it was Roman's birthday.

Of course it did, Roman was its little prince, of course it remembered. It had been so lovely, playing with the not-so little prince again, creating a beautiful magical forest from him to explore, filled with marvelous critters and creatures alike for Roman to play with. And then a dragon, his dragon, his dragon he'd created was he was still a little prince; his dragon flew down and wished him a happy birthday in its own way, taking him flying and curling up around him on the top of the mountain, nuzzling him like he was part of its horde, which he was. But the little prince hadn't understood, hadn't known that was a happy birthday wish, and so when the little prince is crying all on his own, the Imagination takes matters into its own hands.

The door in Roman's room eases open, a soft twinkling sound waking him from his tear-induced dozing. He blinks, brow furrowing at the sight of it, before stumbling from the bed to the gentle light coming from within.

He pushes it open to see the resplendent tree, glimmering and glistening with a single swing hanging from a low branch. All around it spin galaxies, nebulas, cosmic wonders in an inky-purple sea of open sky. His breath leaves him in a rush and the Imagination coaxes him closer.

For you, it whispers as its little prince sits on the swing, marveling at the cosmos around him, all for you, little one, happy birthday.

It dries Roman's tears with soft, warm breeze, the tree branch beginning to gently swing him back and forth. The stars twinkle, the skies fill, and oh, that's better—Roman starts to smile.

All too soon, however, it starts to fade again and the Imagination rushes back—what's the matter, little prince, what's wrong? It's your birthday, you shall want for nothing, what do you need?

It carefully pokes and tests the various emotions radiation from its little prince and…ah. The little prince is lonely.

"Ro?"

Roman turns, eyes widening when he sees Remus. "Re?"

"Whoa," Remus mumbles, taking in the tree and its surrounding wonders, "this is cool as fuck, Roro."

"Um…thanks."

"Seriously, how long have you been working on this? This is—I've never seen the Imagination like this before."

The little prince fumbles for something to say and when he tugs wordlessly on the swing for help, the Imagination obliges. A tendril from higher up in the tree slowly lowers, a single red and gold sparkly cupcake nestled in its grasp. A candle burns atop it, and Roman's breath catches in his throat.

"What's that?" Remus comes up over his shoulder just as Roman reaches for the cupcake. "Whoa—wait, Roro, is it—"

Yes, the Imagination whispers.

"Ro," Remus asks, voice small and soft, "was…was today your birthday?"

"…yeah."

"Fuck," Remus bites out, before storming a few feet away and raising his voice, "we're all fucking horrible, get in here!"

"Language!"

"Remus!"

"Hey, what the hell?"

"Speak for yourself, Remus!"

"No," Remus barks, his hands on his hips as he glares at the various pajama-clad Sides in front of him, "we are all horrible because we just forgot today was Ro's birthday and we're gonna figure out some way to make it up to him!"

"Wait, fuck—"

"That was today? I thought it was next week!"

"Is that—oh, that's why you wanted to spend time with me—"

"Shit."

Roman just sits quietly, unwrapping his cupcake as the Imagination swings him gently back and forth. He seems to like the nebula just off the edge of the cliff, beneath his feet, and so it makes it sparkle a little more, clouds of cosmic dust swirling back and forth.

"Ro," Remus says as the others keep worrying, "I'm really sorry."

"It's fine."

"It's not fine. You went to bed crying on your birthday and none of us noticed. I didn't notice, that's not okay." Remus ruffles his hair. "What can I do?"

"You don't have to do anything."

"But—"

"Look," Roman says, looking up at him, "I don't—having stuff happen because you guys feel bad isn't going to help. I don't want your pity. Or your groveling, whatever you want to call it. There's always next year."

"You shouldn't have to wait a whole year to do stuff you want because we were assholes," Virgil says as the rest of them come closer, "it doesn't—fuck, it doesn't have to be a birthday thing, but do you wanna…I dunno, just schedule some stuff to do with us?"

Roman shrugs.

"You sure?"

"You guys are busy," he mumbles, still toying with his cupcake, "I get it. It's just a day."

"It's not just a day," Patton says, "it's supposed to be your day. If you want to do something—"

"That didn't work out super well for me, did it?" He glances over his shoulder and back down to the cupcake. The Imagination ruffles his hair with another warm breeze. "It's okay. You guys are busy."

"I'm not," Virgil says, "I've got nothing."

"Same here," says Patton, and he hears Janus hum.

"I can spend time with you," Logan starts and Roman just laughs.

"I know for a fact that's not true."

"…it is, actually," Janus mumbles and Roman's shoulders hunch.

"I'd like to be alone, now, please."

"Roman—"

"Now."

And the Imagination obliges, shuttling all of them outside and quickly calling Roman's dragon to come and cuddle him. It comes, chuffing softly and nuzzling his hair, blowing warm air over his bare legs as it curls up next to the swing and rests its head in his lap.

"You were saying happy birthday earlier," he mumbles, stroking the ridges on its head, "weren't you?"

The dragon snuffles in confirmation, nudging the cupcake. Roman laughs, a little strangled, and takes a bite.

"Thank you."

Anything for you, the Imagination whispers as the dragon purrs, anything for you.

Remus is waiting when Roman returns to his room, sitting on his bed in his pajamas with his stuffed Kraken. He looks up when Roman enters and holds out his arms.

"Come cuddle," he says when Roman still hovers by the door, "please?"

"Why?"

"'Cause you're my bro and I love you and you look like you need a cuddle."

"…okay."

Remus is big and warm and soft, and Roman curls up in his brother's arms. The Imagination keeps the galaxies spinning outside his window, his dragon keeping watch as the two of them drift off to sleep.

General Taglist: @frxgprince@potereregina@gattonero17@iamhereforthegayshit@thefingergunsgirl@awkwardandanxiousfander@creative-lampd-liberties@djpurple3@winterswrandomness@sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes@iminyourfandom@bullet-tothefeels@full-of-roman-angst-trash  @ask-elsalvador @ramdomthingsfrommymind@demoniccheese83@pattonsandershugs @el-does-photography @princeanxious@firefinch-ember@fandomssaremysoul@im-an-anxious-wreck@crazy-multifandomfangirl @punk-academian-witch@enby-ralsei@unicornssunflowersandstuff@wildhorsewolf @thetruthaboutthesun @stubbornness-and-spite @princedarkandstormv  @your-local-fookin-deadmeme @angels-and-dreams@averykedavra @a-ghostlight-for-roman @treasurechestininterweb @cricketanne @queerly-fluid-fan @compactdiscdraws@cecil-but-gayer@i-am-overly-complicated@annytheseal@alias290@tranquil-space-ninja @arxticandy @mychemically-imbalanced-romance@whyiask@crows-ace @emilythezeldafan@frida0043 @ieatspinalcords @snowyfires@cyanide-violence@oonagh2@xxpanic-at-the-everywherexx@rabbitsartcorner @percy-07734@triflingassailantofmyemotions @virgil-sanders-the-gay-emo@cerulean-watermelon@puffed-up-bees@meltheromanstan@joyrose-fandomer@insanitori@mavenmush@justablah65@10paradox10@uhhh-hi-there-i-am-nervous@cutebisexualmess@bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti@ultrageekygirl

[bi4pan-polls]

I would like to present, for your consideration, Stephanie Lauter and Peter Spankoffski from Hatchetfield.

Steph has been confirmed to be canonically pan by her actress, Pete has huge bi vibes (and is sorta implied to be transmasc?)

Hatchetfield is a horror anthology series. So far there are three musicals and eight episodes of a webshow, and everything but the most recent musical is currently available for free on YouTube. Steph and Pete have two major appearances.

The first is in the web episode Abstinence Camp, a Friday the 13th spoof. At the start of the episode, they're both forced to attend a Christian summer camp, an idea that they hate bond over. They've got a bit of banter and hit it off well. Highlights include Steph giving him contraband chocolate bars when the counselors don't care about his lowering blood sugar, Pete agreeing she got the short end of the stick in her situation, and the both of them being generally pretty snarky together.

There's a scene where Steph decides to test the camp's rules (and get some privacy) by showering in the boys' washroom. Pete is the only one there, and his first instinct is to do the respectful thing and let her be in there alone, only staying to finish cleaning when she insists it's okay if he's in there. (They have more banter, she finds out just how hot he is when you actually get a good look at him. He's described as jacked in this scene, but due to a recast, this is most certainly retconned. Still a cute moment between them). It culminates in them deciding to test the ghost story running around the camp that doing anything remotely sexy will get you killed by a spirit living in the woods, but are caught before anything can happen. Between getting into trouble and the audience knowing that there have already been other deaths, it's for the best that Steph plans to make an escape. What's sweet, though, is that she makes a point to get Pete to come too.

Throughout the whole climax of the story they both actively try to protect each other. Pete yells at the Axe-Man to leave Steph alone, she shields him from harm when he accidentally breaks his leg. By the end of the story they're both still alive, and are actively aware they're the only ones who know just how fucked up the camp is. It's implied they keep protecting each other that whole summer.

(If there are any Hatchetfans reading this and you haven't seen NPMD yet, here is your spoiler warning.)

Their most recent appearance is in the newest Musical, Nerdy Prudes Must Die. NPMD is also a slasher spoof, but with a twist: the nerds are in danger and the rebellios and popular "bad kids" are on the killer's good side.

The whole show happens because in this timeline, Steph and Pete meet when she asks to cheat off of his bio test.

Two things to note about that. 1. Despite Steph being the most popular girl and Pete being one of the most unpopular kids in all of Hatchetfield High, she already knows his name. 2. It does not take much convincing for him to agree. They get caught, and are sent to detention. Pete freaks out, not because he got in trouble, but because now he's in with a popular girl (the mayor's daughter, no less) and it's going to get him unwanted attention from the kids that pick on him. They have more banter, like in AC, to the point Pete doesn't know how well it's going until Steph says that he's funny and admits she likes funny guys. This sticks with Pete enough he decides to wear nicer clothes and crack jokes more often, even when just with his friends. They even ask if he's trying to impress someone.

Steph calls him. From a payphone.

For someone who never gave Pete a second thought before, she sure did already know is name AND number. Are we sure you didn't already have an eye on him, Steph?

She asks him to give a proper study session, and he agrees, in part due to his friends telling him that sparks were flying. He ends up singing a whole song about wondering if he's really cool enough to hang out with her.

Pete ends up getting beat up by his biggest bully (Max Jagerman) on the way, and when Steph finds out, she gets VERY righteous. She says she's not going to let Pete put up with bullying anymore and offers to step in (even though Pete doesn't think it will do much). Before they really have a chance to do anything, another student (Grace Chasity) offers up her own revenge plan that inadvertently ends up killing Max. Max ends up coming back as a ghost with a grudge against nerds, since everyone that was there when he died (besides Steph) was an unpopular nerd.

They share a lot of banter up until the first death, when things become more serious by necessity. Still, they both do a pretty bad job of covering up their crushes, and end up having a duet arguing over who has the bigger crush and why a relationship would never work between them the way things are right now (note: Pete says he felt almost seduced by her, Steph admits she's into smart guys and knows he's an intellectual type).

As the show goes on, Steph is actively protecting him like in AC, encouraging him to stay behind her in case something happens.

Steph, Pete, and Grace end up being the last three survivors of the main cast, and strike a deal with beings called The Lords in Black. The Lords will take Max to the afterlife for good if one of the teens gives up what they cherish most. Pete and Steph have a crisis, because now they have to admit to each other that okay maybe they are sorta in love, and have to decide who will die for the other. Pete insists that he do something worthwhile for once and save everybody by being the sacrifice. And Steph, despite her heartbreak, agrees.

LUCKILY Grace prevents that by saving the day in the funniest way possible. Too amazing to spoil (and also because I've barely gone into her subplot this whole time). But Steph and Pete make it out together. And they're grateful for it. And they even get to go to homecoming together.

By then end, they've decided they can make it work and have a song about being able to bring out the best in each other. (Special shoutout to the lyrics "I’m the best of you / And you’re the best of me / And together we are free / To run around" and "Its like you knew me / Before you knew me / Its like you saw me / Before you saw me")

(Hatchetfans, spoilers end here)

In conclusion, stan Lautski

(sorry for putting a whole essay in your inbox, op)

Was given permission to post this*

They seem. So hecking cool honesty love this for them I will also encourage other people to submit them

Propaganda for Stephanie Lauter and Peter Spankoffski from Hatchetfield.

[khodorkovskaya]

13.03.23

yesterday was a very thought provoking day so i want to tell you guys about it! lots of stuff about growing up/coming of age, relationships, etc, all that good stuff!

so i went ice skating with my oxford/france bestie and my student as we do every sunday and it was so much fun! im getting more and more confident on the ice! and it was great, i love spending time with friends when we're doing something like an activity , like something with a purpose you know.

then we went to get hot chocolate as we always do and since my student's wife wasn't there, he spilled some tea! we started talking about relationships bc my london bestie was in town this weekend and her bf finally got his visa so he came to our town for the first time ever! it was his first time outside of the uk and his home country so we were all very excited! but anyway, we started talking about relationships bc to be completely honest with you, im not a fan of my bestie's bf, but i'll get to that in a sec. and my student said that he's only been in love 3 times in his life. when we asked him what about his wife, he said it's not really love as in romantic or sexual love, they're just really good companions. and... they've never had sex! which honestly kinda changes my perspective on their whole thing, but also not really. he said they've only ever done kink stuff together bc they're into latex and things like that. and since she's so much younger than him, he's never wanted to have sex with her. as he desciribed it, he's not a zizi kind of guy i.e. he's uninterested in sex in general. and yeah, ive always thought he was somewhere on the asexual spectrum and this confirmed it. anyway, that was a fun fact.

now back to my london bestie and her boyfriend, im not a fan of the guy frankly. he comes off as really uninteresting and they have this whole mother-son dynamic going on, i really don't get it. he's boring and unattractive and also probably asexual or maybe gay bc he's uninterested in sex with my bestie. so i was looking forward to seeing her and i was happy that her bf could finally come to our country, but i would've preferred it if i could talk to my bestie one-on-one without his company yknow? and then my bestie also messaged me saying that she invited another friend of ours to come hang out with us and again... i feel like such a bitch but the friend she invited is just... so uninteresting. the girl has no values and sure, she'll laugh at your jokes and talk about anything, but i can't stand her superficiality. every time i hang out with her i feel like im wasting my time.

so on my way to the bar i was already imagining all the dumb conversations we're gonna be having and how bored i was gonna be, already trying to make up excuses about how i could get myself out of this and go home and work instead of gargling air with two of the most uninteresting people i know. and i felt so shitty because i was supposed to be looking forward to seeing my bestie and i was supposed to be happy about her boyfriend's visa and i was supposed to be happy about seeing that other friend bc i haven't seen her in ages. but i was just dreading it so much oh my god. i don't know what it is. am i a bitch? am i pretencious and arrogant and do i think too highly of myself? i felt awful. and even my ed thoughts were coming up on my way there. i was like "ooo im skipping lunch today im gonna be so skinny yay". like wtf. i wanted to be happy about seeing my bestie but instead i felt guilty and just wanted to go home and work...

anyway, as anticipated, i was bored out of my mind... her boyfriend's attitude was pissing me off. i asked them what they've done these past two days, like what they've visited and what their plans were. and they said that they went to the old town, walked around the lake, ate at mcdonalds and drank wine. which is fine i guess but like... there's so much to do around here and so many things to see! you can have mcdonalds and wine in london and tbh the old town is not really worth visiting if you don't know anything about it, like it's just a couple of pretty houses, it's gonna be boring if you just walk around aimlessly. like idk if i had two days to show our city to someone who's never been, i would've done so much more idk. and then the bf was like "yeahhh this place is boring it's not for me" and when i asked him why, he said that it's because there are a lot of pubs in london and not a lot around here. like duh of course if your only priority is drinking ofc you're gonna be bored anywhere you go. idk that really annoyed me. plus they didn't even go out at night so he didn't even have a point of comparison. like sure, we don't really have pubs like as in english pubs, but we have a lot of cool bars and clubs and other fun night time activities. like i invited them to the disco on ice on saturday, which is sooo much more fun than drinking wine at home come on! but they said no! and our town is the boring one, all right!

then my bestie invited me over for dinner with her parents and her ukrainian friend. and as the night went on the more and more i kept realising that i don't have much in common with her anymore. and it was so heartbreaking bc we grew up together. we had so many integral life moments together but now it seems that they weren't so integral after all. and it sucks because no one else is gonna know what i was like growing up and it feels like such an important part of me. she's the only one who's seen this part of me and yet it has no importance anymore because we barely have anything in common now.

idk it sucks and there's not much to say. we have different lives, different views, different priorities... and i really felt like the odd one out because at the dinner table everyone was kinda on the same page (except for the parents bc they're getting divorced lol but that's another story). at one point bestie's mum asked me where i was at with my studies. she asked me if i still give language lessons and do catsitting and i was like not really. i have one student who's become a friend now and for the cats thing, if my neighbour asks me ofc im gonna help out. but im not actively looking for these kind of jobs like i did in highschool because duhh im an adult now and im working. and then the mum was like "yeah, you should stop doing that. let's find you a real job" and it really like... upset me. because what about our business? no one seemed to care or ask me any questions about it. "where's you shop again?", "you sell clothes???" like guyssss this has been my family's life for years now! and im pretty vocal about what we've been doing and the project we're working on. and yet no one cares. i don't know, it made me really upset. as if everything we've been working on is not serious. as if getting a "real job" is the only thing that matters.

i don't know, i feel like there's a lot to say but there isn't much to say... it's just that me and my bestie have grown apart. and it hurts. it hurts that i can't relate to her anymore. and i don't understand her lifestyle or her opinions or her way of viewing the world. no, i do understand. but it's so unlike me. we don't value the same things. and it sucks.

and then the ukrainian girl was talking about how she went to dubai and how it's the place to be and how she's looking for a husband. and again, i just cannot relate. and felt so left out. like i don't know, ive gone through so much these past couple of months and it's incredible. but i can't share it with anyone because no one cares. everyone has different priorities... my bestie has an office job she's comfortable at, her boyfriend complains about life and wants to move to canada to find himself, bestie's mum is leaving her husband to go live with her lover and worries about how because of the war in ukraine her job's been intense, the ukrainian girl is trying to find a husband in dubai meanwhile her hometown has been destroyed. and i... well.... i can't even explain it.

i suddenly felt really scared of being alone for the rest of my life. i remembered coming home to B and feeling like i had my person. it felt nice imagining that i was not alone because i had him. but ive always felt lonely with him. but coming home and cuddling with him was nice. im scared that i'll never find my person, someone who can see and understand me, all of me. for now the only people i can relate to are "weirdos" like my student and my oxford/france bestie. they're so much fun! but is this how it's supposed to be? how do i fit in with normal people? how do i become normal?

anyway, i walked home and cried and felt very alone.

and then i had a dream about B and how i came home and he wasn't there so i called him and said "i can't do this anymore, it's either me or [his business name]". i woke up feeling satisfied that i had finally said it. but it's too late now, our relationship can't be repaired. and i can't set any ultimatums anymore and make him choose, because i chose to leave. and he chose himself. and im gonna be alone.

[persoj]

People have entered and exited this café since I started running it. Most look terrified as they enter, wary of this new environment. I find the best thing to do is smile, sit them down with a cup and explain the whole thing to them. I have a script for it now, almost fully memorised. Usually goes a little like this:

"Here, have a cup. Sit down. My name is Ava. I run this café. Right now, you're not quite alive. You're not dead, don't panic yet. But here is where most come before they pass on. Most people who come in here usually make it out alive, though. At the moment, there's probably someone trying to save your life in a hospital or something. Imagine that! Or maybe you've been put in a coma. Like [Name] over there, they've been here for [Amount of time]. Why don't you go and talk to them? They can probably answer some of your questions."

At the moment, the person who I usually refer them too is Jamie. He's been here for about 2 weeks. Keeps to himself for the most part, unless I send someone over. Then he opens up a bit. He told me that he finds comfort in knowing that he'll probably never meet these people face to face. And even if he does, they won't know what he looks like. That's the fun thing about this place. You don't ever look like yourself, not unless you really want to. I think I've changed my appearance about 70 times since I opened this place. Can't even remember what I looked like. I'm pretty sure I was blonde or brunette or something, but I can never be fully sure.

It's been about 10 years since I opened the shop. I've seen lots of people come and go. Some older people (the older ladies are always so nice), some middle aged, some who look too young to be dying. That's the saddest part. Seeing the smaller ones. Teens, little kids, toddlers, even babies. Everyone feels sad when a child comes through. The whole café sort of just quietens, and everyone comes to talk to them and comfort them. The babies are always held and rocked, and everyone gives them a hug before leaving them with me. I have a room in the back just for the babies. The toddlers will usually play with each other, or just the adults in general. Usually puts a smile on people's faces. It can also really help when a new person walks in. Jittery, jumpy, and shaking. Then a toddler approaches them, asking them to play with toy cars. It's always very cute, and the person calms down almost immediately. The kids always seem a little scared. Stranger Danger makes them wary, as it should. But they learn to trust you eventually. Once you've talked to them, gained their trust and handed them a lollipop or chocolate bar or two, they calm down. The teens are easy enough. They're old enough to be told what's happening to them. You sit them down, explain things whilst you bend at their knees, answer what few questions they may have, then leave them in the corner with a drink. They tend to just sit and contemplate. Most young adults do, as well.

Some try to ask me about my story. I rarely tell them. Only if they end up somehow staying here more than a month. After that time frame, they've earned the privilege. I tell them about the accident, the large truck that rammed into me. I tell them about the coma I've been in for the last ten years. I tell them about the people who come and go, and about my family. My parents, my wife, my brothers and sisters and friends and just everyone I can think of. Just because I rarely tell the story, doesn't mean I don't want to. I tell them everything. My entire life, from start to near-finish. It's always liberating.

Anyways, there's a new customer coming in. I think I'm going to give them a blue cup.

Thank you for reading this far if you did :) I'm very new to tumblr and to writing, so any tips are appreciated!

You run a café on the edge of life and death. Souls who have been departed from their bodies temporarily, such as in comas or near-death experiences, can relax in your quaint cafe for as long as they need before they can either return to their bodies or begin their journey to the afterlife.

[armideleonblogs]

Hi, my name is M and I've been in a toxic and abusive situationship.

If I may be honest, I thought I was too smart and too strong to be a victim of this kind of destructive situationship. However, I didn't realize that it's what's happening until it got to a point where I've become toxic myself.

The relationship started online and it was all flowers and chocolates. Everything fit like a glove, it was perfect. Until little by little, I saw signs of manipulation. The person would just tell me that they're going out and I'd have no right to ask who they're with, where, what time they'd be home, or anything for that matter. Then they'd say that I'd been told, I probably just forgot. And they'd leave to party at 8pm and be home at 7am the next day.

When confronted, I was told that I was controlling and selfish. I was told that it seemed that I wanted to have their world revolve around me. I explained that I just wanted to know if they were safe and if they could update me because I worry. They were adamant that I should "chill" and trust them. So I did. And it continued for weeks and weeks on end. Parties left and right and they'd tell me at the last minute. They'd be wasted and sleeping at the bar or the club until they are able to drive home. I was beginning to get uncomfortable, so I expressed that if they need to be like that, I might as well leave the situationship. And for some time, they've adjusted to reason, but still not taking accountability and not admitting that their previous behavior was poor.

Then there came fights over the pettiest things like "How come you did not reply to me but replied to this person?" or "Can I see who you've been talking to?" There have been so much distrust and assumptions. And if I say something to make her feel as though she's at fault, she is very reactive. She says rude and very disrespectful things, would not stop trying to call you when you are not in the proper mindset to talk about things, she'd twist my words so it would appear like I was the one attacking her and remind me of all of my previous faults to make me feel guilty.

Worst, it got to a point where she's threatened to exploit my secrets to the world if I don't admit to everything being my fault. And the more we fought, the more I see a side of me that I don't recognize anymore. I look in the mirror and I loathe what I see, but I couldn't get away because I thought that if I explained my side better, if I make her see that both of us need to adjust, maybe, just maybe.... we'll be able to sort it out and fix what should be fixed.

Then a time came that I was strong enough to break up with them and intended to make it as smooth and pain-free as possible, it took some time. Months, I'd say, before it actually sunk in. We maintained contact and I thought that it would be okay to do so. I wanted to make sure she was okay, too. That I didn't burden her with too much hurt so she can move on as well. But it did not go as I intended, there are days, very rare days, that she's pleasant and seem to be accepting of the situation... but the days where she's unpleasant and angry, and ugly, are much too often to ignore.

She would recount all the ways she feels I hurt her. Recounting the smallest of details even the ones that happened some years ago, to which she said she's already forgiven and moved on. She would recall all of the efforts she's made for me and all of the things she's done for me. She would use my words against me, like how I would try my best to be patient with her and tell me that I didn't even try. She would tell me that I was a liar for telling her I loved her and yet one small threat to my mental health, I back away and give up. She told me all these things and still continued to threaten my peace by declaring that she would exploit my wrongdoings to all of our friends if we didn't get back together.

That's when I ghosted her. Is it wrong? Am I wrong for doing so? I did warn her before that last argument. I told her that one last fight and I will remove myself from her toxic narrative and still she tried to undermine me so I stopped replying to her messages and emails.

I blocked her on all my social media platforms, blocked her numbers on all of my mobile numbers, and blocked all of our common friends. I care not for what she tells other people or if, indeed, she'd tell everyone my secret. I care for my personal wellbeing and mental health. I did try to help her accept what happened, but I think there was only so much I could do. I had to save myself. I had to leave.

[woso-dreamzzz]

Youth Team IV

Hardersson x Teen!Reader

Part of The Big Adventures Universe

Summary: Your first youth game

The Denmark youth team calls you up on a random day.

Or, rather, they call your mothers who are more than happy to accept.

It's your first youth team call up and you can't help the nerves that settle in your stomach.

At first, everything goes smoothly. You meet the coach and the staff and you get settled in your room.

That's when training starts.

There's two other keepers to play with. They're both on the upper ends of the age range of the team. You're on the lower side.

They're worldly and smart and seem leaps and bounds ahead of you. They catch shots you could only dream of and seem like good friends, already having a solid relationship to pick up every time the international break comes around.

You're the outsider here, the girl that has to fly over from Sweden every time just to play in an international team. The girl that no one else here knows because she plays her football in Sweden. The girl that's so much younger than everyone else and took the spot of one of their friends.

The coaching staff have seen something in you that no one else can see, even you. You're young and untried and everyone keeps looking at you like they expect you to be some great talent.

As of yet, you haven't proven it which is why it's a surprise that you're the starting keeper for the match against France.

It's a surprise for everyone else too, if the way the other two keepers complain is anything to go by.

France is a tough opponent, even at the youth level and while this isn't a tournament, it still sets the bar for the future.

Your coach is trying out new positions and new rotations and new team chemistry. He takes no complaints.

You stay in the starting line-up no matter how many people complain.

You stay in the starting line-up no matter how many of the older girls give you a dirty look during training.

You understand why. You're the outsider here. You're the one taking the spot from their friends. You're the one that's appeared randomly and is taking away chances from others.

The match, as predicted, is incredibly difficult.

France have a good front line.

(One day, all of these girls will be in the senior team against you).

They press high. They press hard. They press fast.

Your defence falls apart before your very eyes.

One time, after a rough training session, Magda told you something in the car.

The goalkeeper is meant to be the very last option to stop a goal. If a defence is good then they should be able to stop a strike before it happens, before it manages to trouble the keeper. The sign of a good defence is when the goalkeeper doesn't need to save a single shot.

But the keeper is also in charge of the defence on the pitch.

The coach can tell the players anything before they're on the pitch but, in the heat of the moment, the keeper needs to remind the defence of their jobs.

Your first half is difficult with your defence making silly mistakes and playing like they've never been in the back line in their life.

France dominated possession and the amount of shots on target with the amount of space your defence has gifted them.

You come off the pitch pissed, unwilling to make eye contact with your mothers as you pass them in the stands.

You don't even want to look in Pernille's direction.

You're playing for her country right now. You don't want to disappoint her. You don't want her to look at you when you inevitably concede to France and lose Denmark the match.

"Hey," One of the older keepers says to you, standing in front of your cubby with her arms crossed over your chest.

You're sat down, leaning back against the wall as you stare at the gloves in your hand. Your energy drink sits next to you, half empty with the small chocolate bar Pernille always tells you to eat to give you a boost of energy in the second half.

Your throat bobs as you look up at this girl.

"Hey," You say back, completely defeated.

She looks at you, eyes roving over your body before she lets out a long suffering sigh.

"If the defenders are playing shit," She says," Then you need to tell them. I suggest yelling, get it through their thick heads that if they can't stop the ball from getting to you then the goal conceded is their fault."

"You want me to yell?"

"Look," She says," I get you're all quiet and stuff but out on the pitch you're in charge of them. If they're not up to your standards then you better fucking tell them."

"I-"

"Plus it helps get some of your frustration out."

Her words circle in your head even as you walk out for the second half.

France dominates again and it's not long before they're bearing down on goal.

You defence is wide open, allowing way too much space and you have to go to ground to save the shot.

Rage boils under your skin as you stand up, marching over to your defence as they mill around waiting for you to release the ball.

"Tighten up!" You snap," You're giving them too much space!"

"Whoa, wait a minute-"

"No! Just close ranks when they come near! Cut them off then and there and I won't have to make the save because if you keep playing like that sooner or later, they're going to sneak one past me!"

You don't give them time to argue back, rolling the ball out to your midfield.

The game ends nil-nil but you don't have to make any more saves and you don't bother sparing your defence a look as you walk off the pitch, making your way right over to the stands, hoisting yourself up and over.

"I'm sorry," You say, head bowed as you stand in front of your mothers," We didn't score."

"I don't think scoring is exactly up to you," Pernille says, reaching out to cup your cheek and pull your head up," You're responsible for not conceding and you did that. A clean sheet on debut. That's a win in my book."

"But not a proper win," You say.

"Let's focus on what you can control," Magda says," You control the goal and the defence. You didn't let a ball past you. You told your defence they needed to tighten up. You did well."

"Really?"

Pernille laughs. "You're too hard on yourself. Now, go down, get showered, get changed. We're going out with your grandparents tonight and we need to tell them about your amazing debut."

[casspurrjoybell-17]

Hart and Hunter - Chapter 18 - Part 1

*Warning Adult Content*

Julian Hart

"Freya says she'll come," Dane tells me the following morning when I emerge from the shower and join him in the kitchen. 

I've quickly learned to do most things with one hand but I see he's made me breakfast and take a seat as he serves me biscuits, scrambled eggs, sausages and fruit. 

"Great. She can help me with the mountains of food you keep dropping in front of me," I say, lifting my brows at the Dane-sized portion on my plate. 

"You need good nutrition to heal. Not grab-and-go breakfast bars." 

"Those bars have 13 grams of protein," I counter, shoveling fluffy eggs into my mouth.

"It's like a complete meal." 

"No, it's not. Good food doesn't come in rectangles." 

"What about chocolate?" 

"Chocolate's an ingredient." 

I roll my eyes and give up.

He has strangely strong opinions about food and he can keep them.

Besides, he's a much better cook than I am and I'm not complaining. 

"Ingrid's out already?" 

He nods.

"She took your car. I think it's love." 

I laugh.

"Wait till it breaks down on her. What else is on the menu today?" 

He joins me at the table, handing me a cup of coffee prepared the way I like... with what he considers far too much cream. 

"I figured we'll start with the other shop owners. See if anyone noticed a change in Lagrange's behavior recently and if they've noticed the same in anyone else. Something that might help tip us off. Halloran texted me earlier. He and Vasquez will visit the funeral home."

"He's taking Vasquez along?"

I frown.

"Won't that make it hard to ask the right questions?" 

Dane lifts a shoulder and drains his coffee in a few gulps. 

"Nah. Not any harder than asking without really asking, if you know what I mean. Get a reputation pretty fast if you keep bringing up things like 'skin-changers' in every interrogation." 

I frown, still not entirely satisfied. 

"What's wrong?" Dane asks.

"Whiskers in your gravy?" 

“What?” 

He shakes his head and smiles.

"Nothing. Just something my Mom used to say when someone looked preoccupied." 

"Oh. It's just... I guess I thought you'd want a crack at the funeral home. It seems like the most promising lead." 

Dane shrugs.

"Might be but more than likely they were just following directions. Anyway, Wolf or not, I still gotta follow the rules and Halloran and Vasquez are the leads on this. I don't get a say." 

"Does that bother you?" 

He tilts his head to the side.

"You think it should?" 

I chew a bite of biscuit before answering.

"Sometimes it seems like you miss it, is all. Being a cop... badge and gun, power and authority. All that." 

He looks away.

"Sometimes I do." 

"Would you go back?"

 After a moment, he shakes his head.

"No. Being a cop had a meaning it doesn't have for me anymore. It's not where I belong. Now..."

He looks at me again.

"Now this is where I belong." 

I turn my attention back to my plate but I'm already full.

Dane reads my thoughts and pulls the remains of my breakfast towards himself. 

"Will you tell me?" I ask, the question rising like a bubble, unconscious and unstoppable, to my lips. 

Dane looks up from the biscuit and eggs.

"Tell you what?" 

"About being a cop and what it meant for you. And before that... about your time in the Marines. You must have..."

I wave a hand.

"Stories, right?" 

He huffs a laugh.

"Yeah, I got stories. I didn't think you were interested." 

"Why not?" I ask, a tiny bit hurt by the question. 

He lifts a shoulder in his characteristic shrug. 

"You never asked." 

"I thought you didn't want to talk about it." 

He smiles and reaches across the table, his fingers gently grasping mine where they protrude from my cast. 

"I guess I've been too busy with the present to care about the past but I'll talk about it all you want, if you want me to. What's brought this up now, though?" 

"The case, I guess," I admit and shiver.

"It just seems horrible... that something could replace someone you love and you wouldn't even know."

Dane frowns and I wonder if the same thought hadn't occurred to him yet. 

"I can't imagine it," he says.

"I feel like I'd know you no matter what." 

"Another reason to complete the land-bond, maybe," I say and smile. 

His amber eyes warm a little and it feels good to be fuel for that fire. 

"So," I say.

"How about we start with the person most likely to notice something amiss?" 

"I like the way you think, Hart," he says, lips curving in a smile.

"Let's talk to Vicky Lagrange." 

********

The Lagrange's live just outside Spring Lakes, in a neighborhood with a log-cabin, vacation-home feel, nestled beneath tall pines and among outcrops of basalt and granite boulders. 

It's home to a mix of year-round residents and seasonal visitors.

The Lagrange's are the former and their home is one of the larger but older, on their street, with steeply slanted roofs, tall, almost church-like windows and a large wrap-around porch. 

Vicky greets us at the door.

I recognize her from the funeral, though today she wears comfortable athletic clothes with her sleek black hair gathered in a messy ponytail.

Her makeup-free face bears little mark of her age, which I'd gathered was considerably less than that of her late husband. 

"Mrs. Lagrange. Thank you for seeing us."

Dane inclines his head in greeting but doesn't extend his hand. 

As is his habit, Dane removes his shoes at the door and I follow suit. 

Vicky lifts her brows but says nothing as she waits,and then leads us on into her living room. 

The first thing I notice is now nice it is.

An enormous fireplace built of smooth river stones stands free at the center of a generous space, a high ceiling with bare beams of light, natural wood gives it a lofty feel and the furnishings... though comfortable and well-used... are luxurious.

The second thing I notice is all the bicycle-related decor... a huge photo printed on canvas depicts a group of cyclists racing along a scenic coastal landscape, a brass bicycle sculpture occupies a side table and a single front wheel hangs like a strange, spiky wreath on the wall. 

Dane and I settle on a cream leather sofa while Vicky sits opposite on a matching settee. 

"Can I get you anything? Coffee, or tea?" she offers. 

"No, thank you. We won't take much of your time," Dane says, speaking for both of us. 

"I've already spoken to the police," she says, sniffing and wiping her eyes.

"But they wouldn't tell me what was going on. Just that there'd been some sort of mix-up at the morgue and that Jeff's body was..." she stops and sniffs again, reaching for a ceramic tissue dispenser and blowing her nose.

"I mean, how many times am I going to have to bury him?" 

"Hopefully just the once more, ma'am," Dane says.

There's something a little dry in his tone and I shoot him a questioning glance. 

"We're sorry for your loss," I say, leaning forward a little.

"And we're sorry for the distress this has caused. We're hoping to get to the bottom of it... put it to rest once and for all." 

She nods.

"I just want to understand. I mean, how do you lose a body? And now they're saying he was murdered? I don't even know who to sue." 

Dane's amber gaze flicks my way and wonder if Vicky is more upset by the loss of her husband or by the inconvenience of his death. 

[craftyinfluencerfun]

Dashing Valentines Day Gifts To Tell Your Love

Introduction

Valentine's Day is just around the corner, and love is in the air! It’s that time of year when we express our deepest affection for those who hold a special place in our hearts. And what better way to show your love than with a thoughtful and heartfelt gift? Whether you're celebrating with a significant other, family member, or dear friend, finding the perfect Valentines Day Gifts can truly make their day extraordinary.

In this blog post, we'll explore the importance of showing love through gifts on Valentine's Day. We'll delve into traditional gift ideas that never go out of style and also uncover some unique and creative options that are sure to leave a lasting impression. So get ready to ignite those sparks of romance or shower your loved ones with adoration – because we've got all the dashing Valentine's Day gift inspiration you need right here!

The Importance of Showing Love on Valentines Day Gifts

Valentine's Day is a special occasion to express your love and affection for that someone special in your life. While love can be shown through words and actions all year round, this day holds a unique significance. It is an opportunity to go the extra mile and make your loved one feel truly cherished. Giving gifts on Valentine's Day has become a tradition that symbolizes love and appreciation. These gifts serve as tangible expressions of the emotions we hold within our hearts. They have the power to convey our deepest feelings when words fall short.

But beyond material value, it is the thought behind these gifts that matters most. The effort you put into selecting a gift shows how much you care about understanding your partner's desires and preferences. It demonstrates your willingness to go beyond expectations in order to make them happy. Valentine's Day gifts are not just gestures; they are symbols of commitment, loyalty, and devotion. They remind us of the bond we share with our significant other and reinforce our connection on this special day dedicated to love. So, whether it's a handwritten letter expressing heartfelt emotions or an extravagant surprise, remember that every gift has its own charm when it comes from a place of genuine affection. Take this opportunity to show your love in ways that will be remembered forever!

Traditional Gifts for Valentines Day Gifts

Valentine's Day is a time to celebrate love and express our affection for those who hold a special place in our hearts. And what better way to do that than with traditional gifts that have stood the test of time? These classic gestures can show your love and appreciation in a timeless and elegant manner. One traditional gift option is flowers. Whether it's a bouquet of roses, lilies, or even daisies, flowers are sure to bring a smile to your loved one's face. They symbolize beauty, romance, and the fragility of love – perfect sentiments for Valentine's Day.

Another tried-and-true gift idea is chocolates. Who doesn't love indulging in some sweet treats? From heart-shaped boxes filled with an assortment of delectable flavors to personalized chocolate bars featuring your loved one's name or heartfelt message, there are countless options available to satisfy any sweet tooth. For those who appreciate fine craftsmanship and sentimental value, jewelry is always a hit. A delicate necklace adorned with their birthstone or initials can be worn close to their heart as a constant reminder of your love. Or perhaps a pair of earrings that sparkle like their eyes when they see you. If you're looking for something more practical yet still romantic, consider giving them something they've been wanting or needing but haven't had the chance to get themselves - maybe it's that book they've been eyeing, or that gadget they've been drooling over. In conclusion... Oops! Sorry about that slip-up! We should never use "in conclusion" while writing blog sections without concluding them fully. But fear not! There are plenty more unique and creative Valentine's Day gift ideas waiting for you in the next section. So stay tuned!

Unique and Creative Valentines Day Gifts Ideas

Looking for something out of the ordinary to surprise your loved one this Valentine's Day? Skip the traditional roses and chocolates and opt for unique and creative gifts that will truly make their heart flutter. Here are some ideas to inspire you: 1. Personalized Love Letter: Instead of buying a generic card, take the time to write a heartfelt love letter expressing your feelings. Add special touches like using scented paper or sealing it with wax. 2. Customized Photo Book: Compile all your favorite memories together in a photo book filled with pictures, quotes, and anecdotes that celebrate your relationship.

3. Experience Gift: Create lasting memories by gifting an experience rather than a physical item. Plan a romantic weekend getaway, book tickets to a concert or sporting event they've always wanted to attend, or arrange for a couple's spa day. 4. DIY Coupon Book: Design a coupon book featuring personalized vouchers for things like breakfast in bed, a home-cooked candlelit dinner, or even chores they hate doing that you'll take care of. 5. Subscription Box: Surprise them with monthly deliveries tailored to their interests - whether it's gourmet snacks, wine tastings, or self-care products – there’s something for everyone! 6. Adventure Date Jar: Fill up a jar with different date night ideas on popsicle sticks – from trying out new restaurants to going hiking or having movie marathons at home – let fate decide what adventure awaits next! 7. Handcrafted Jewelry: Show off your creativity by making custom jewelry pieces such as bracelets or necklaces using meaningful charms or gemstones symbolizing love and affection. Remember, it’s not about how much you spend but the thoughtfulness behind the gift that counts most on Valentine's Day! So go ahead and surprise your partner with something unique and creative that truly reflects how much they mean to you.

Conclusion Valentine's Day is a special occasion to express your love and affection towards your loved ones. And what better way to do that than with a thoughtful gift? Whether you opt for traditional gifts or unique and creative ideas, the key is to choose something that truly reflects the depth of your feelings. By selecting a Valentine's Day gift that resonates with their personality, interests, or desires, you show them just how much they mean to you. From classic options like flowers, chocolates, and jewelry to personalized items or experiences tailored specifically for them, there are endless possibilities when it comes to finding the perfect gift. Remember, it's not about the price tag attached but rather the sentiment behind it. So take some time to think about what would make your partner feel loved and appreciated. Consider their hobbies, passions, or even inside jokes that only the two of you share. In this digital age we live in today, buying Valentine's Day gifts online has become increasingly popular—and convenient! You can browse through countless options from the comfort of your own home and have them delivered directly to your doorstep. Just be sure to order early enough so that it arrives on time! Ultimately though, no matter what gift you decide on this Valentine's Day—whether it’s traditional or unconventional—it is important above all else to remember why you’re giving it: because love should always be celebrated. So go ahead and make this day extra special by choosing a heartfelt token of affection for your beloved.

[batpham-discord-highlights]

Danny the teen heroes mentor Part 2

source: #crack

Part 1

Midas: Space Doorway CEO they've got multiple theories -Danny's a hero, either still active or retired -Danny was a hero's sidekick -Danny is a lab experiment/clone of a hero -Danny is just a cool guy and this knowledge is coincidental -He's secretly just a hero fanboy and that's why he knows so much -Danny's a retired villain

soap -Danny's an active villain looking to get close to them to beat their mentors and take over the world

ectoentity | Dino Facts CIO except he never asks like. identifying questions or anything

Midas: Space Doorway CEO -Danny's a villain looking to train them because the heroes nowadays are easy as shit and he wants a challenge

ectoentity | Dino Facts CIO he just mother hens them and sometimes asks what video games they're into

soap it's almost immediately thrown out, until an adult finds out and gets suspicious

ectoentity | Dino Facts CIO of course

Midas: Space Doorway CEO that is not one of the kid's theories That's an adult's theory

ectoentity | Dino Facts CIO what if Phantom is actually known to the JL but they don't know about Fenton but all the kids know about Fenton and not Phantom

Midas: Space Doorway CEO nice

soap Phantom just drops info on their kids and the JL gets super suspicious it's a pun because "super" and they're "super"heroes I'm hilarious

Midas: Space Doorway CEO how do the adults notice Fenton then? did they notice an improvement in the kids' performance?

ectoentity | Dino Facts CIO or one of the kids says to another like "if you don't eat breakfast i'll tell Fenton"

Midas: Space Doorway CEO …..do you think he would pull the "I'm not mad, just disappointed" card then or nah?

soap possibly, another likely option is that food just appears around them punishment for skipping a meal is being surrounded by bread like that one kid from that one movie

Midas: Space Doorway CEO Danny: super gadgets? Kids: check Danny: homework to finish while on break? Kids: check.. Danny: did you have breakfast? Kids: uh, no..? Danny: unacceptable, check your pockets Kids: granola bars! with chocolate! Danny: of course, I'm not an idiot, I know how to trick my kids into eating their fiber it's the first time he referred to them as "his kids"

ectoentity | Dino Facts CIO aww soap awwww Midas: Space Doorway CEO you can bet they will tease him about it, but don't really mind soap wholesome crack Hades: Dani Todd CCO — 10/21/2022 3:28 PM Wholesome crack is the best kind Midas: Space Doorway CEO now imagine the kids doing that to the adult heroes they're super confused because "hey that's good advice, but I never taught you that wtf" soap they think their kid is "cheating" with a different mentor it all comes to a head when someone on the JL brings it up with another member in a meeting, in which Phantom is there, and it clicks that he never told either side who he actually was ectoentity | Dino Facts CIO they kind of are, but it's also just some rando they met soap JL Member 1, pointing at JL Member 2: you stole my kid! JL Member 2: I stole your kid? you stole my kid! Danny, realising that they're talking about him: :pikachu_batman: ectoentity | Dino Facts CIO the question is, does danny commit to the bit or does he tell the truth Midas: Space Doorway CEO COMMIT TO THE BIT soap obviously commit to the bit Midas: Space Doorway CEO Danny "extra" Phantom: if you stole their kid, and you stole theirs- who stole mine, huh? soap everyone: you have a kid?! Phantom: well, yeah, but someone stole them! ectoentity | Dino Facts CIO danny mentoring the kids: make sure you tell the truth to your responsible adults unless it's really funny soap the JL ask him about his kid and he describes their kids Midas: Space Doorway CEO HA soap JL Member: oh wow! it sounds like your kid would get along really well with mine! Danny, who has been describing their kid for the past hour: oh, really? Midas: Space Doorway CEO we're cackling like a devil right now that's hilarious LittleMrsCookie Danny (as Phantom) to Batman: I've recently started mentoring this Teenage Hero, now that I think of it, he reminds me of one of your Robins, but I'm sure it's a coincidence … (starts describing one of Batman's kids)

[1u11ablues]

Pudding (Kaz Brekker x Reader)

Summary: Kaz sits next to the reader by the bar, and it gets harder and harder for him to control his thoughts.

WC: 1.7k

Warning: Mentions of alcohol, sexual frustration.

A/N: I love Kanej with all my heart but I can't stop thinking about this idea so I decided to just write it so I'll be able to move on to other fics. I also might write a second part to this, which may or may not include smut.

Kaz's eyes fixate on your lips. Cursed pudding. He knows they're tasty—and so they're your favourite—but every time you scoop some into your mouth and close your eyes to savour the taste, an image of you spread before him starts swarming his mind.

His gaze moves towards your neck when you swallow, the sudden urge to attack your soft skin with his lips drowning his other thoughts—thoughts that should've been more important than this. It took him years to learn how to be okay with skin to skin contact again, and now that he can tolerate it, the more primal of human urges fizzes within him,threatening to bubble out onto the surface.

You hum in bliss, not realising there was a trace of pudding right at the corner of your mouth. Kaz's head starts spinning at the idea of swiping it off with his tongue, tasting you, tasting that goddamn pudding off your mouth. 

Ghezen, he mumbled, gloved hand flexing over a shot glass full of whiskey, his third one for the night. He's not sure if he's using alcohol to distract himself—or give him the willpower to sweep you off your feet and make you pay for the endless nights (and days) of frustration you've unknowingly caused him.

He doesn't know how long he stared at you until your eyes met his. When they did, you were smiling shyly at him. He looked away quickly and cleared his throat awkwardly.

"Kaz, you want some?" You offered it to him, that sweet tone in your voice making his heart flutter and dick twitch. He studies your face, confused—because normally, you're not one to share. It doesn’t matter anyway, there’s something else way sweeter he’d rather taste than chocolate pudding. 

"No, I don't want to deprive you—and you have some over there," he points out, not missing the deflate in your tone when he refused your offer. 

"Oh—oops," you swipe your lips with your middle finger and proceed to suck the pudding right off it. Kaz lets out a hiss. It almost seems like you were stirring him on purpose, but he's pretty sure you're just that oblivious. Your tongue chases the chocolate smearing your finger, and suddenly he's thinking of you on your knees, lips swollen and wrapped around him, tears running down your cheeks as you choke on his aching cock. 

His left hand grips his cane tighter, looking for relief in other ways except that. He's the Bastard of the Barrel. He can survive this night without giving into the myriad of ideas he had involving you under him.

"One more shot, Jesper," perhaps saturating himself with more whiskey will help ease the longing,unfortunately it's not working as well as he wants it to.

Jesper studied how Kaz acts around you tonight. And many other nights before this. He gossips about it with Inej sometimes, too. They've noticed how Kaz's eyes will wander all over you when he thinks nobody's watching. "Here you go," he slides the glass to Kaz, trying his best to talk about the plans of the upcoming job that involve some jewels worth hundreds of thousands of kruge.

Alas, they might need to discuss this another time, some day where Kaz is not distracted by the sight of a pretty lady shovelling pudding into her mouth. Jesper doesn't blame him, you're very attractive—hell, he'd make a move if he didn't know Kaz secretly wants you. He also didn't blame you, because he's the one who introduced you to the place that sells that pudding, and he knows just how good it is for you to be eating it that sensually. 

"Tomorrow, then," he tells Kaz—or tries to. He's pretty sure Kaz wasn't even paying attention to anything else that had happened the past half an hour. Somebody can literally be cheating in on his Three Man Bramble table right then and he won’t even notice.

An hour has passed and it's getting late. You stood up to say your goodnights before heading back into your room in the Slat. You were an unexpected addition to the Dregs, recruited because you have fast fingers and light on your feet. That’s just a nicer way to say you were the only one who managed to pickpocket Kaz. Inej thinks she can train you to do what she does ,going into hard to reach places and stealing the secrets of important—and mostly dangerous people. The fact that you can control air is a huge bonus too. They can get away with taking bigger and heavier antiques using your abilities.'Business' is booming with you as their new addition.

You bat your eyelashes at the boys—your light and flirty ways of interacting a breath of fresh air among the Dregs. "See you guys tomorrow," casting one last look at Kaz, a last ditch effort at casting your lure. You had an inkling that Kaz might have the hots for you, but maybe you were just projecting. Oh, well. Perhaps you misinterpreted the way he looks at you, but after waiting for months for him to make the first move, maybe you should've just taken the hint. Rejection sucks, but you'll survive. Guess it'll be you, your hands, and your overactive imagination again tonight. 

Kaz lets out a sigh of relief as he watches your figure disappear into the night. He stretches his hands, surprised to find out how tense he had been. 

"We'll talk about this tomorrow, Jesper. I'm a bit wound up at the moment." Jesper snorts. 

Raising an eyebrow, Kaz asks, "What's so funny?" 

"Really?" Jesper retorts, "How long are you gonna spend pining over her?"

"I'm not pining. Over anyone. Now pour me another shot. And no further talk about this unless you want to sleep on the streets tonight."

Jesper raises his hands in defeat, choosing not to press further. The prospect of not having a warm bed to sleep in does not sound good to him. He pours Kaz's drink and slides it to him. Maybe sleeping on the street for one night is worth it if it means his boss will finally find someone. At the very least , he was hoping that getting his boss laid will mellow him a little. 

"You know," Jesper starts collecting all the empty glasses on the bar while Kaz tries to down his shot , "She's always joking around me and Inej that she'd sit on your face if you'd asked her to..." 

Kaz choked on his whiskey, his eyes glistening from the burn in his throat. "But of course, that might just be her delightful sense of humour," Jesper added, trying his best not to let out a chuckle and risk getting even more in trouble.

Jesper never missed the telltale signs of longing in your voice when Kaz's name was brought up, but he advises that this was not something wise to pursue—because everyone in the barrel knows just how dangerous of a man Kaz is. Trying to make a living in Ketterdam is dangerous. Trying to make a living in the Barrel—under Dirtyhands himself—makes life and death seem like a game of poker. You never know what hands you’d be dealt with each day.

You're stubborn, though. It's what your parents kept telling you ever since you're a kid. So, despite his reputation, you can’t help yourself from harbouring some sort of feelings for him. Initially, Jesper believed that you were into him more than he was into you. Well, after tonight, he’s not so sure of that anymore. It seems like the tension was mutual on both sides. 

"Jesper," Kaz warned. A dark edge to his tone, as he started visualising the scenario Jesper had put in his mind. A tent was forming in his pants. He'll need an ice-cold shower if he wants to be able to sleep tonight.

"Hey, it's not my fault you two looked at each other like that." 

"Like what?" 

"You know, like that—" his eyes roam the room looking for the right words, "like nothing else in the room exists except for you two."

Kaz scoffs,the choice of words Jesper had chosen a little too out of place with his way of life. It sounds too ...romantic. Kaz doesn't do romance. 

Shrugging at the scornful look on Kaz's face, Jesper continues, "and Inej told me—not to tell you of course—that the feeling is mutual, so I don't see why you have to keep all this," he gestures, "contained."

Kaz glares at Jesper, patience running thin. Why his sharpshooter had bothered telling him this, he had no idea. If it's true, though, then maybe… No. He can’t allow himself to think about it. If his thoughts start roaming again, sooner or later he’ll find himself outside your room and it’ll be too late before he realises the mistake he’d made. Any kind of connection with him makes you a liability—and the idea of someone using you to get to him is enough to make him want to send you far away from Ketterdam. But five shots of whiskey are enough to skew even the most sturdy of decisions. 

Before he has the time to process, he stands off his seat at the bar and makes his way into the Slat. He breezes through the flight of stairs leading to your room, and just as he was about to knock—he heard you. 

“Kaz,please,” you moaned—voice muffled,but it was unmistakable. You were moaning his name and the tightness in his pants prompts him to adjust himself. The whole ordeal sobered him up.

“What am I doing?” he scolds himself, rushing away from your doors into his room.

He wanted so much to stay and listen to you, to join in when he couldn’t take it anymore, but he can’t. There’s too much at stake. 

Kaz spends the night stroking himself, seeking for any kind of relief. Even as he lays there, empty, he still can’t get the thought of you, writhing on your bed, out of his head. After tossing and turning—and making himself come once again—he finally manages to fall into a restless slumber.