#'but you dont like action movies'
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how would i watch the movie confidential assignment 2: international in my house without paying any money
#'but you have no time' yea i dont#'but you dont like action movies'#also true#'youve watched movie in the last 7 months why are you now going to watch an action movie you have no reason to believe is even good'#i didnt say im gonna watch it i just want to know how i could. if i WERE going to.#anyway the actor i based kadokuras design on is in itcarrying guns around so i could get reference pics from there. if you must know.#someday#memecomradeoriginal
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speaking of how to train your dragon and creature design, the shift from the really naturalistic art direction and character animation for the first movie's toothless- the face getting flatter, the eyes bigger and closer together, getting rid of the little realistic details like the dust collecting between the scales, the pink splotching where the scales end at the nostrils, the muted markings, the animation making a shift from largely realistic animal behavior to much more anthropomorphic- is such a huge downgrade to me, made worse because it's subtle in such a way that you will sound insane if you mention it
(huge L for the "the audience's capacity to find a creature cute and empathetic and expressive is directly proportional to how much it looks like a human baby" principle of character design because the first one is so so much cuter)
#also i don't know how to frame this in a sane way but i don't like how he looks like leather in the last one ....#i have to make this post because people keep messaging me and going 'you dont get it the live action design is based on the third movie'#yes i get it! i don't like it
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thinking about how Humans Are Space Orcs stories always talk about how indestructible humans are, our endurance, our ability to withstand common poisons, etc. and thats all well and good, its really fun to read, but it gets repetitive after a while because we aren't all like that.
And that got me thinking about why this trope is so common in the first place, and the conclusion I came to is actually kind of obvious if you think about it. Not everyone is allowed to go into space. This is true now, with the number of physical restrictions placed on astronauts (including height limits), but I imagine it's just as strict in some imaginary future where humans are first coming into contact with alien species. Because in that case there will definitely be military personnel alongside any possible diplomatic parties.
And I imagine that all interactions aliens have ever had up until this point have been with trained personnel. Even basic military troops conform to this standard, to some degree. So aliens meet us and they're shocked and horrified to discover that we have no obvious weaknesses, we're all either crazy smart or crazy strong (still always a little crazy, academia and war will do that to you), and not only that but we like, literally all the same height so there's no way to tell any of us apart.
And Humans Are Death Worlders stories spread throughout the galaxy. Years or decades or centuries of interspecies suspicion and hostilities preventing any alien from setting foot/claw/limb/appendage/etc. on Earth until slowly more beings are allowed to come through. And not just diplomats who keep to government buildings, but tourists. Exchange students. Temporary visitors granted permission to go wherever they please, so they go out in search of 'real terran culture' and what do they find?
Humans with innate heart defects that prevent them from drinking caffeine. Humans with chronic pain and chronic fatigue who lack the boundless endurance humans are supposedly famous for. Humans too tall or too short or too fat to be allowed into space. Humans who are so scared of the world they need to take pills just to function. Humans with IBS who can't stand spicy foods, capsaicin really is poison to them. Lactose intolerance and celiac disease, my god all the autoimmune disorders out there, humans who struggle to function because their own bodies fight them. Humans who bruise easily and take too long to heal. Humans who sustained one too many concussions and now struggle to talk and read and write. Humans who've had strokes. Humans who were born unable to talk or hear or speak, and humans who through some accident lost that ability later.
Aliens visit Earth, and do you know what they find? Humanity, in all its wholeness.
#humans are space orcs#humans in space#earth is a deathworld#earth is space australia#tagging this so that ppl can find it even though the space shit i write about always feels like its in direct opposition to all the pop tag#also my biggest pet peeve in all of writing - all writing. everywhere. not just in fanfic but books and tv and movies too - is when people#write off an injury by saying something like 'oh nothing bad just a couple of scratches some bruising and a minor concussion' like girl WHA#MiNOr ConCuSSioN is such an oxymoron and I hate it so fucking much. like i dont care how minor it was thats still brain damage.#especially when the same character does this more than once. like im sorry ms. but uh. you can no longer read. or talk eloquently. sorry#evidence: my brother has had two 'minor' concussions and now cannot read write or speak without tremendous effort. And like its totally#ruined my ability to watch action shows/movies because now i just sit there and count how many concussions there characters are getting#after a certain point it becomes totally impossible to believe that these guys are able to function. (still fun to watch tho im not a hater
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you are umasou
#I watched it today it was so good#im not big on dinosaur stuff but i like how it was used to approach the predator/prey conversation especially when both sides are sentient#instead of just defaulting to well since predators are meat eaters their actions are automatically immoral so their role in the story#has to match. and then when your characters /are/ meat eaters you just step around that whole topic#heart knows he has to kill and eat so there’s no avoiding it but even he knows he has agency over that#hell he even decided to hunt by himself so umasou doesn’t have to see him kill and eat another dinosaur a day after meeting him#and maybe its because it’s a kids movie but it also doesn’t make a big show over the act of hunting and eating. it doesn’t dwell on it#like yes you can clearly see them ripping into guts minus the graphic details but it doesnt go out of its way to censor it either#its played straight just like hearts mom having more kids like nobody asks who the father is or when that happened cuz it doesn’t matter#what matters is she still loves heart and encourages her kids to greet their big brother and they do!!! it’s sweet#Beckon was also an interesting touch bc they make it clear the only reason he doesnt eat umasou is bc he cant and not that he wouldn’t#but he’s still a funny and interesting character and that doesn’t get in the way of how we see him too much#same for baku he was pretty polite with heart esp from the start when he asks him if hes abandoned implying he would be prepared to#look out for him from the start. and at the end when he decides to spare him. I dont hate him at all hes just intimidating#you are umasou#doodles#I wanted to draw smth more detailed but I couldn’t decide if I wanted to go with the cartoony art style#or smth closer to realistic?? so this is like. some sort of compromise I guess
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"i dont like animated movies" okay but why. like i genuinely would like to know WHY. and id like to hear literally any other reason besides "animation is for kids" or "its childish"
#like i actually do not understand this mindset#animation can be whatever the fuck you want it to be!!!#theres SO MUCH you can do with animated projects!#i want more action movies that are animated! i want more deep stories that are animated!!!#i want adult animated series and movies that are made with love and that are made by people who love animation!#take the spiderverse movies for example#those movies are absolutely BEAUTIFUL to watch#and theyre GREAT MOVIES! NOT JUST VISUALLY!!!!#but all of my family refuses to watch it and the only reason they will give me is “because its animated. i dont want to watch a cartoon”#ITS SO FRUSTRATING#like im sorry but would you call arcane for example a cartoon? would you call that a kids story? would you call it childish????#i genuinely dont understand people like this#stiff talk
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genuinely devastating that it's been four years since hlvrai came out and i still haven't seen ANY art of dr. coomer and dexter jettster together 😢 come on bro hes dr. coomers FAVORITE star wars character. they can hang out in the diner (from star wars: the clone wars)!!!! i think he would love that shit. we have the freedom to draw whatever we want and yet.........!!! 💔 world is a fuck
#genuinely tho if someone did actually draw that at some point (past or future) send me the link please 😭😭😭😭😭😭#hlvrai#sw#muffin mumbles#also u might be saying ''well why dont you draw it yourself?'' the answer is i cant do either of them justice separately#so as much as i really really want to. It would look like dogshit 😭😭😭 one day i will be able to do this idea justice#not today though 💔#also . sighs deeply. 🤓 the diner was actually in attack of the clones (the second prequel) NOT the clone wars!!!#attack of the clones is a live action movie!!! clone wars is an animated tv show!!!#people mess this up all the time and it drives me CRAZY. and by crazy i mean barely even mildly annoyed LOL
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If I could be arsed to learn how to edit videos and had some kind of mic, I would 110% make a two part video essay series on the politics of Jurassic World because MY GOD, there's so much to dissect.
The first part would be about how the park is the epitome of neoliberal futurism for techbros, including the way the park so easily falls apart though I doubt that aspect is purposeful. Everything is aesthetic first and function second, and we can't possibly use any of the reliable infrastructure we've already come up with because a train is not gonna get us to Mars, but a monorail might.
And the second would be about the buckwild terrible gender politics going on. The movie is deeply unsympathetic to Claire seemingly because she's a woman who prioritised her career as it's both centre to her character arc and also an inciting event of one of the plots. Not to mention the whole Zara thing or the Owen and Claire thing or the stupid "him, I meant him, line. The movie is rife with misogyny, but it feels like that specific misogyny was isekaied over from backlash to second wave feminism.
I could talk about it all for so long because in a way, it feels like a perfect time capsule for 2015. Back when people took Claire running in heels to be this feminist statement to be made fun of and not just a deeply misogynistic movie trying to sell you feminism. And back when Elon Musk managed to get away with his "I'm the real life Iron Man" shit, and people believed he was smart and all his plans would come to fruition. 2015 was a great time to be a tech bro in Silicon Valley with people just throwing money at all your fake promises.
Yeah. See. This is what I mean when I say I could talk about it forever.
#kai rambles#jurassic world#one of the reasons why this has ended up one of my favourite movies is because it kinda got rounded up and out as a big dumb action film#but like.#look at elon's robovan or libertarian sea pods or the hyperloop or the straddling bus or the vegas sphere#then look at jurassic world#and tell me all these stupid dumb ideas and constructions wouldnt fit in perfectly in jurassic world#and that the really dumb way of thinking that creates those concepts wouldnt be the kind that gives you ''lets make a new dinosaur''#tell me this movie doesnt perfectly encapsulate that way of thinking#including the lack of redundancies and procedures and the complete lack of guard rails and the way it just falls apart#i dont think it was on purpose#i don't think the movie is clever enough for it to be satirising tech bro led neoliberal futurism#because those are two long words that many people dont know the meaning of because they didnt take sociology at some point#but it is a decent satire of it#meanwhile its gender politics are in a dire situation#and i also dont think that's necessarily purposeful?#i think maybe the character of claire began as the hollywood cardboard cutout of a Feminist™#and then since they were copying the first film so much they decided they needed to have kid characters running around and a family plot#and then also they were like well obviously we need a romance arc because thats how these movies work#and so they gave claire the opposite traits of owen because opposites attract#and then oops this character is a deeply misogynistic caricature of a woman#and we really dont have many other women in this cast who do much so you know.#its just. theres so much#guys there's so much
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like. it’s lovely that you’re enjoying the deadpool/wolverine shipping. but it’s still a marvel movie. i thought we were supposed to be boycotting marvel bc they have an israeli character?
hm. i already spoke about this but im just gonna be honest. you cannot deprive yourself of every. single. fucking. thing. and i am so fucking tired of policing people that are already doing shit for enjoying a single thing that isn't even involved with it.
i dont really talk a lot about what i do, because i dont think i have to justify how i live my life (something about good people dont have to brag about how good they are), but im already boycotting mcdonalds, im already boycotting starbucks, sodastream, burger king, phillips, airb&b, as much of nestle as possible, and every other company i can reasonably boycott. im donating to fundraisers and pleas for help. i donate to the pcrf. i donate to demining ukraine. i donate to greenpeace and a national cancer fund. i go to protests and demonstrations, i participate in community efforts, i share resources and fundraisers and verified information. im rallying for voters, i'm involved in my local community's green party. you dont see what i, or my friends, or other random internet users, are doing behind the scenes.
i am stretched fucking thin, my bank account is dwindling to keep up with everything. im going through insane health scares right now, chronic pain, anxiety so severe i want to fucking die, and a major chronic depressive episode to top it all off, i. am. exhausted.
you cannot deprive yourself of everything because when you do, there'll be nothing left of you. and who the fuck are you going to help then? the world is still happening, it's still turning despite the wars and genocides, despite the rising death toll of climate change, despite the threats to democracy. all we can do is put our effort where our mouth is, and take care of ourselves.
#i think the marvel boycot was also for a specific movie that came out earlier this year#it does not apply to all of marvel#and even if it does. im sorry for spending 13 euros on a fucking movie ticket and drawing fanart of the only thing that can take my fucking#mind off the fact i might have a very serious health condition. im sorry for enjoying something i guess.#and i GET that you're most definitely coming from a place of good heartedness. but genuinely youre the so manyth person coming into my inbox#to scrutinize my actions on a fucking ship and my like for actor men#you know how in an emergency situation you are ALWAYS supposed to care for yourself first? it applies here too.#that may sound harsh. it may sound heartless. but if you are not there anymore it's one less person that can help#bad anon ❌#and don't worry. i dont consider myself good people 👍
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for the electric dreams remake, all i care about is that edgar has the most obnoxious early 2000s internet aesthetic possible. i repeat, THE MOST OBNOXIOUS. 2 billion blinkies, terrible gradients, bad contrast, absolutely unreadable bullshit. if modern tech minimalism comes anywhere near that entire movie i’m going to throw up
#i know it’s inevitable that they’re gonna make him a chatgpt alexa#and it’s gonna have like modern ai commentary#but you gotta understand. the aesthetic of that movie is one of its main draws#if you HAVE to make it modern#make it modern in a different way than the bland apple aesthetic i BEG#sorry to my trekkie followers i am hyperfixating on this movie. you will look at it#electric dreams#electric dreams 1984#edgar electric dreams#edgar#COUGH ALSO MAKE HIM QUEER. MAKE THE WHOLE MOVIE EXPLICITLY QUEER.#MAKE IT BI AND POLYAM#BUT LETS FACE IT. THEYRE COWARDS#SO IF THEY DONT#AT LEEEAST REMOVE THE MALE GAZEY SHIT AND MAKE THE PLOT BE MORE COHESIVE#and make miles actually face the consequences of his actions#fix the problems the movie already has DONT MAKE NEW ONES#AAUUUUHGHHH#rainspeak
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people will think im ordinary until they say one (1) thing about tmnt and all of a sudden im explaining the entire lore starting from the 1990’s movie & why donatello is the best turtle i fear… T^T
tag limit fights me… i must yap… please listen… SOB </3
#tmnt yap in the taggies !!#would you believe me if i said my cat is named after donnie… teehee !! ^_^#i have been a tmnt lover since i was the ripe age of 6 years old SOBSOB#i used to write bf headcanons on wattpad way long ago… thats where my love for writing started i fear…#i probably have more tmnt merch than i do anime merch which is soso crazy to think about PHEW !!!#notebooks cups plushies legos shirts pajamas stickers tins action figs keychains name something and i have it… is that weird… SOB#im not joking when i say i know the entire lore and could explain everything from start to finish… FOR EACH AND EVERY REBOOT EVER…. wowza…#other than rottmnt because i’ve never been a fan of that reboot sigh…#the only reason donatello hamato isnt on my blorbie list is because i do not want to seem out of touch… he used to be there though !! :3#also i love raph too sigh#i fear donnie was my start to my love for nerdy men… raph was for the mean ones… cough cough akaashi and bakugo#tall lanky men… yeah hes a turtle… i know… let me speak… pls… i beg… T^T#tmnt 2012 will always be my star my light my beloved#i can recite every single episode </3 ALSO THE 2014 & 2017 MOVIES DONT GET ME STARTED i have them on dvd :3#i also have the 1990’s movies on dvd teehee theyre sososososoo good T^T my comfort franchise forever and always#i may always speak of anime but just know tmnt will always be the start of it all and my most beloved <3 its everything to me#also i was and still am an avid tmnt 2012 april oneil hater someone get her out of there i loathe her >:/#was never a supa big fan of leo im very sorry… idk who im sorry to… where are my tmnt fans… am i alone in this world… hello… tmnt fans…#omigosh im back after looking at my old wattpad story IM GIGGLING why was the writing kinda good… it was first person though sigh… goodness#i should create my own tmnt yap tag i fear… i will never shut up about it EVER SOBSOBSOB !! i even had a tmnt party when i was younger </3#donnie ( & mikey ) are so misunderstood UGH i could yap about the lore all day. donnie deserved more recognition he was always doing so muc#FOR ALL of his brothers and they never appreciated it… ill cry right now. donnie you will always be famous to me. april doesnt deserve you.#raph and his temper are so misunderstood too like please. always making him the bad guy HE JUST WANTS TO BE A GOOD BROTHER HES JUST AWKWARD#remembering when i had a crush on a guy names joseph in first grade and he liked tmnt too… joseph just know we were soulmates… i promise </#i used to go up to the tv and kiss the screen when donnie showed up. i was like 6 years old tho its okay… still sleep with my stuffie tho.#thank you to my yaya for buying me that when i had the flu hes still in perfect condition SOB donatello i love you so much UGH im crying#‘thats a mutant turtle ew !!’ HE IS VERY BEAUTIFUL AND LOVEABLE TO ME. YOU WOULDNT UNDERSTAND EVERYPONY </3 nia reference woah hi nia :3#whos in favor of tmnt. raise your hands up high so i can see them. im giggling. tmnt lovers rise we sha’ll prosper… WE RIDE AT DAWN 🦅🦅🦅#is this like totally crazy of me… has anyone read this far… if you have jusy know i love you. i cherish you. you are my everything <3#₍ᐢ..ᐢ₎ — lene’s latest gossip .ᐟ
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I could go on and on and spiral about a LOT of things relating to NSBU:
The NATURE of the nsbu movie and what THAT could entail and what THAT could mean for the characters in this movie
The way at how everyone in the main cast AND barsimmion follow the themes of the lack of change and stalemate in life
#nsbu spoilers#d20 nsbu#never stop blowing up#im so glad they finally ran into barsimmion bc it essentially means we can see what id like to call. the metaplot#which is essentially. okay so you have nsbu the movie plot. the shadow falcons the santo patron the kingskins group etc.#the metaplot is very simply: everything relating to the lake elsinore gang#anyway cal and i devolved into a half an hour talk about what IS nsbu the movie.#and the idea that potential of. almost self awareness to this fact. bc to these guys all of THIS? is resl to them and theyre living it#it changes in a dime#and they keep going. actions and consequences bay bee#so to have this ever flowing ebb and flow of a lifestyle juxtaposed with these 6 normies who REFUSE to do anything more with their life.#or rather might be too scared to consider what could happen if they take the first step or cant emotionally do it. whatever the reason.#putting these guys in situations where THEY DO have to act. where they do have to change bc if they dont they WILL LITERALLY DIE#its fun its really fun to think about
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i guess we're all happy about the how to train your dragon live action being super accurate to the original so far yay! but also what's the fucking point. we don't need a beat-for-beat remake in live action with cgi when we have a perfectly good 3d animated movie. i truly do not see the point
#you guys just don't respect animation as a storytelling medium#like i obviously wouldn't WANT them to change stuff because the original is so good#but then thats the whole fucking point isnt it?!?!?#the original is good why do we need another#even if it ends up being super accurate and follows the original story WHATS THE POINT!!! WE DONT NEED ANOTHER!!!!!#literally just watch the original movie#how to train your dragon#httyd#poppy#httyd live action
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I think part of the reason why the Doom movies have sucked so bad is because they've been from the POV of UAC security guys and not Doomguy (also making it aliens and not demons, which i think is what doom 3 did? Which, incidentally, is partly why doom 3 is also Not Very Good). And like the thing is, from the POV of anyone who isn't Doomguy, it absolutely is a survival horror. Those people are scared for their fucking LIVES. From Doomguy's perspective, this is just another Wednesday. He's barely breaking a sweat. And this is where the experience diverges, because the Viewer expects a movie to be a gore fest rip and tear delight, but these random UAC idiots are just not equipped to handle a demonic/alien invasion. You came to see a demon's chest get cracked open with someone's bare hands, but instead its the demons doing the cracking.
The other reasons the movies sucked so bad is because they weren't animated.
#not fallout#kal talks#i dont think you could tell a good doom story in live action. animation is 100% the way to go in order to portray the kind of combat#that would make it fun and interesting to watch#also the thing is like. i think it would be really interesting to have a survival horror offshoot where youre some random uac security dude#just trying to make it#because the tonal shift when doomguy shows up sounds like it would be funny#you hear distant heavy metal and youre like...... huh#hiding in a closet and theres a chainsaw revving in the distance like oh jesus#idk i feel like both doom movies had potential#even in annihilation where they imply that doomguy is a woman which i didnt actually mind. doom annihilation felt very accurate to#the first doom game#because in the first doom game doomguy just WAS that random uac security guard just trying to make it#he wasnt special or anything at that point in time he just had a shotgun and determination#i dont even know where inwas going with this. I just wanna talk about doom lmao...#doom rambling
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genuinely i dont think there needs to be a big extended sonic movie universe. i think 3 movies and a spinoff miniseries are enough. we do not need a bunch of sequels and spinoffs introducing all the characters and adapting every game . to be clear this wasnt prompted by any specific news i was just thinking about it
#and i say this as someone who LIKES the sonic movies btw#theyre not perfect theres some parts that i dont care for (like. the stuff with cops. sonic and friends dont like cops what are you DOING)#but i do for the most part find them to be a fun watch#however . we dont need a 4th one . please#i dont even get the point of adapting the entire game series like the games already exist just go play those#do people think that live action adaptations are an inherent improvement deserving of more respect or something ?#also just look at the mcu. its a mess thats literally impossible for the average viewer or casual marvel fans to keep up with#id hate to see the sonic movies turn into that even if im a dedicated sonic fan that would be able to keep up with it#now that i said this the third movie is probably gonna have a post credits scene#thats jusr silver showing up and going ITS NO USE !!!!!!!!!!!!! or some shit teasing a 4th movie
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not really Concerned or Conflicted abt the yakuza show one way or another BUT what if its actually Good good. like the last of us or fallout or whatever type of "mainstream" good and not so corny it turns around to being kind charming again but at its core its still bad type of good... like THATS what yakuzais about if youre not going what the Fuck is happening at least every hour then whats the point!!!!!!
#and i dont mean like the standard Shirtless Rooftop Action or the bowling chicken manager#i mean like helping mj out to film the thriller music video or some curry super hero roaming the streets#you know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it cant be all serious with some silly at times it HAS to be stupid. like the movie#also coming out a day after my birfday... is that good or bad
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"they need to stop with live action remakes"
sadly, that is not going to happen. there will always be people who will buy tickets to see these movies, whether you like it or not. it's obvious it's making money, because disney keeps making them.
#i dont like it either but you cant complain about it because.. like i said#it somehow makes money#and for some reason people are still calling the lion king remake a 'live action' movie when it isnt#all of the characters are animated so it's definitely animation#just in a photorealistic style#lots of ppl will argue til the cows come home about this to THIS day#but it's animation. plain and simple. people animated those lions#every time i have the itch to watch the lion king i just simply watch the original#and pretend this 'remake' and its prequel dont exist#hell i need to watch the 2nd one. i cant even remember if i have watched it at all#or if it's just been years and i forgot#anyway rant over. bedtime!#delete later
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