#'but we are your friends!'
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(More from final dnd session)
Previously, drinking at a tavern...
Paladin to group: "It would be my honor to call you all friends!"
To Bard lawyer npc: "all of us."
Party nods in agreement
Bard: "I don't have friends. I have clients and associates."
Wizard: "need it in writing?"
Fighter: "there doesn't need to be a contract for everything."
Bard: "it helps, yes"
Ongoing joke of this guy having a contract for everything and it sometimes gets him into trouble. The wizard takes out a piece of paper and writes "We are friends" in big letters. The party all signs it and hands it to the Bard, who sighs and files it away.
This session, the party has completed their mission and returned home. They are relaxing at an upscale bar.
Fighter to party: "Living as a gith in the Astral Sea, I know very little about friendship. But, I'm very happy with the bonds I've made, with 3 new friends."
Everyone happy and hums in agreement.
Fighter, to Bard: "4 friends...?"
Bard: "no no... I--"
Sorcerer: "oh come on. After everything?"
Fighter: "at least admit we are friendly."
Bard thinks for a moment, then pulls out the "contract" the party had written.
He tears it in half, and the party gasps
Bard: "maybe...there doesn't need to be a contract for everything."
Cue awwwws
#this bard is a pc in an evil campaign#it's gonna get real awkward if the good guys have to fight#and Bard is there#'but we are your friends!'#'do you have that in writing?'#ditdw#dnd#bard
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white americans when you tell them that the idea of climate change as an impending disaster is a reductive first world perspective because it’s a tangible reality for many in the global south already:
#climate change#im TIRED#and i’m saying this as someone who also lives in the US.#im glad that none of you have to worry about your family and friends in other countries dying because of the heat#but this idea that “oh we have to stop it before we reach the extreme” is SO STUPID#because it’s already reached the extreme in some places!!#people are dying in south asia. people are dying in southeast asia. people are dying in africa. people are dying in central america.#people are dying in south america. people are dying in island nations.#what will it take you to care about these people#or will you not care until it’s people who look like you who are dying.
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well 🧍♀️ as a reminder this blog is NOT a safe space for trump supporters but it IS a safe place for women, queers, trans ppl, people of color, undocumented people, and any marginalized group.
#if youre feeling upset or disillusioned i am right there with you#but now more than ever#i want to remind you of the importance of community#check in on your friends#advocate for your friends#protect your friends#protect your community and who you love and care about#and we will get through this#my dms and inbox are always open#even if you just want to vent#im also so sad right now but we have to be strong and stick together right now#(also if youre not american pls understand this affects us all and to not invalidate the feelings of americans)
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Hey now, Let her cook!
#dungeon meshi#chilchuck tims#senshi#laios touden#marcille donato#izutsumi#oyasumi punpun#<- In case you are wondering what the source for the little bird guy is.#Yeah that's right. I'm back to my extremely obscure crossover BS.#Punpun is one of those series that falls under the category of 'Good! but I cannot responsibly recommend this to anyone."#If Dungeon Meshi is like a friend asking you to go on a quick errand and you accidently go on a life changing roadtrip -#Punpun is your friend asking to go on a quick errand and they pull up to the vet and tell you your dog is being put down.#Then they explode into sludge. Melting your car. You hitchhike back but the person who picked you up is an axe murderer.#I could not finish it. My friends who did say it was good. But agree it was for the best I did not finish it.#Hey speaking of tone twists...We are one episode away from one of my favourite chapters being animated!#WHO'S READY FOR THE SENSHI BACKSTORY! WHO IS READY TO CRY!#ME! I AM! I spooked my flatmate with how energetic I was this morning. I'm vibrating with energy I was not designed to contain.#I should talk about today's episode here: It was very good. I love how they animated the familiars.#And!!! Anime only people now are in the loop on the Chilchuck lore. Part 1 of many. He still contains multitudes.#They all do to be honest! If this episode told us anything it was that we still don't know these characters as well as we think!#See you guys next week. I'll be inconsolable.
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hi. what do you mean
#snufkin#I’m very sorry that your friend has decided you need pronouns.#you’re right. you don’t.#the library has OG Moomin comics for some reason they’re very tattered and deliciously smelly#and sometimes I look at them while the children are eating the other books.#you’re getting such an insight into my Saturdays we start with pickling onions at dawn and then we’re at the library seeing WHATS UP#I’m gonna pin this what a great conversation good job boys
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i think my favourite part of the ratfish episodes are the fact that it's the most accurate portrayal of friendship i can think of. here's all your friends but they're anonymous, make each other laugh. it's always one specific thing that would make no one else bat an eye that makes you get made by someone else. katie made a joke about anti-depressants and immediately got clocked by rekha. zac mentioned publix and grant went "that's zac." grant chose a bette midler song and ally went "gay ass. probably grant." zac didn't get any vibes at all from steven and realised he knows his friends better than this. i do not know this person in real life.
#you know what it is. youd know it with your friends too. they say one specific thing and you go yeah thats x lol#we couldve guessed them because of their jokes n references we know of as celebrities but what they got clocked bywas UNINTELLIGIBLE for us#game changer#the ratfish#zac oyama#ally beardsley#grant o'brien#rekha shankar#katie marovitch#brennan lee mulligan#jess ross#sam reich
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You know what I cannot wait for? The day we have an election and we don’t have to say vote like your life depends on it because it does. This man has seeped into every facet of our lives for almost TEN years. Think about that. With one simple vote for Kamala Harris and Tim Walz he’s cooked-forever, and we won’t have to deal with that urgency again. We can have real policy debates and make actual progress again, once he is gone for good. So let’s do this thing one last time let’s vote like our lives depend on it and get back a better politic.
#us politics#2024 presidential election#kamala harris#kamala 2024#us election#election 2024#2024 election#save democracy#vote democrat up and down the ballot#let’s chart a new way forward everyone!#we got this every vote count every vote matters it’s crunch time baby take all your friends to the poles let’s goooooo!
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Yeah, Kris is definitely NOT alright.
FIRST - PREVIOUS - NEXT
MASTERPOST (for the full series / FAQ / reference sheets)
#undertale#deltarune#utdr#crossover#crossover comic#undertale fanart#deltarune fanart#twin runes#twin runes comic#twin runes au#kris dreemurr#frisk#and we arrived at the breaking point#i know the last pages have been very depresso but i swear once this arc is over we'll get right back on track with the funnies#but first we have to deal with some DRAMA#imagine what it would be like if some otherworldly entity took over your body#and suddenly you start making friends and patching up old friendships#Something even your mother is proud of you for#even though it's not YOU doing that#you'd feel like people don't like YOU but only that parasite in your body#because without it you're just that creepy kid next door#you'd feel like the world would be better without you#at least that's what Kris must be feeling right now#i DO wonder what's up with this cave though#it clearly is NOT the exit#and what's with those markings outside and inside the cave?#hmmmmm
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my favorite thing about jacob anderson and sam reid is that jacob anderson is married with a child and has a second career as a respected musician and sam reid is a 37 year old vaping bachelor with a helix piercing who has recently emerged into peak hotness and slutability. and they’re bffls.
#incredible friendship dynamic#it’s like those memes that are like your friends in your 30s will either be like#‘yeah we just put a down payment on a house’ or ‘i think im ready to try a foursome’#sorry to rpf like this#m
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too lazy to grab a ref whatever girl
#trigun#vash the stampede#checkadii#surprising myself because sitting down and drawing for an hour in fact. does make me feel better#like you like edrawing. you feel bored and bad when you dont draw because you have fun while drawing . why are you surrpised youre havng fu#sighhh#goodnight (unlikely will be sleeping soon) i dont want to go to uni todayy (its midnight)#have not been enjoying this class since the whole friend group thing#o well#we look forward to the vw roadtrip playlist mini anthology at the con and we ball
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
Plain-text version:
Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
#hlep#original#mental health#my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it#i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support#and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of#huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the#longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel#i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop
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you know how everything is like a hundred times funnier when you're not allowed to laugh??
#this is almost based on true events. once at a sleepover a friend of mine was in the most ABSURD sleeping position#and we COULDNT keep it together. we woke his ass right up by losing it the second he made a small noise in his sleep#the owl house#toh#my art#human realm hijunks#amity blight#luz noceda#vee noceda#willow park#yes they are used to this but have you considered: your friend sleeping is always going to be hilarious#comic
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Let me tell you their duo WASNT something I expected to see. Like. Ever. Oh my god ahahaha
#maccadam#transformers#spoilers#earthspark spoilers#prowl#tfe prowl#tf earthspark#megatron#tfe megatron#let me tell you a funny story#I have a friend who loves Megs#and when we started watching season 3 and Prowl showed up#and immediately him and Megatron started insulting each other#we both were like#your son is hurting my son 😑#but then when the last episode happened#it felt like we both were proud moms of two dumb kids#when Prowl hugged Megatron we both went fucking cheering l o u d
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we can fish if we want to....
#we can leave ur friends behind.... bc your friends don't fish and if they don't fish well they aren't no friends of mine#<- this is borderline incomprehensible sorry#my art#artists on tumblr#digital art#fish
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I feel like if you're using a lot of disposable plastic bags in your day to day life, you've gotta do something sustainable to make up for it. Like using bamboo toilet paper or eco friendly cat litter or something, yknow
Honestly I exaggerate for comedic effect, while I DO routinely use ziplock bags to hold spaghetti I cook maybe once a month and the bag itself is usually for freezer storage. I actually throw out maybe one bag a week? I DO hate washing plates and tupperware and junk but that usually just means I eat sandwiches without a plate.
I agree though that needless waste should be avoided, and I do avoid it- biodegradable bags and recyclables, empty butter tubs used to store leftovers, etc.
This said, though, not applicable necessarily for myself but for a lot of others- I feel that it's importat to remember that there are many people who legitimately NEED things like plastic straws, or catheters, or pre-packaged foods
And the idea that that's a moral failing that individuals need to personally make up for when a single billionaire blows out more CO2 in a long weekend than I will in my whole life on a superjet meet-cute in the Bolivian rainforest between humvee drag races funded by the river-polluting textiles plants they planted in a third world country to avoid EPA laws and give an entire village stillbirths and stomach cancer is an idea that those very same bigwigs have spent a LOT of time and money investing in planting in the public psyche.
Like- Glass bottles are infinitely recyclable, so why are so many drinks in plastic now? Loads of drinks manufacturers used to buy them back and clean them for re-use, so why did they stop? If they chose to make something out of a limited and environmentally irresponsible material, why is it my failing to track down a correct process of disposal for them? What if there are none in my area? Do I lobby for more recycling plants in my area? Do I set aside some of my limited time outside the pain factory of my job- which I have more than one of, thanks to rising costs of things just like that drink I just emptied- to properly dispose of this company's waste FOR them?
Say coca-cola just rolled up to your town and started dumping millions of empty plastic bottles in the street, going, "wow, you should really think about building and staffing a recycling depot, it would be really shameful of you to just put these in the trash." When companies purposefully use materials with limited lifespans- because yes, even plastic can only be reused so many times- and tell you it's your own fault if it harms the environment- that's essentially what they're doing, just with more steps.
Yes, its important to be as environmentally concious as we can in our day to day life, but responsible sustainability is not catholicism. We don't get good boy points from our lord and savior Captain Planet every time the average low-income household gathers together to hold hands and repent for a single-use plastic that allows them to access something they need.
Entire families could eat trees and shit dead lithium batteries for years and still not do as much damage to the planet as an average dye plant or braindead celebrity does in a week just for fun, and I'm mad about it
...this went on longer than intended.
TL/DR: DO recycle and minimize waste, but don't beat yourself up over the little waste you can't avoid, and follow the money.
EDIT: Part 2
#I swear to god if any one of you in the notes calls me terminally online or pretends I'm saying you can just dump bags in the ocean#Yes definitely do your best to live sustainably#But also#You personally are not killing pandas#Unless you are in which case please stop#We put too much money into pandas but let them go in peace#Go do some yoga#Sorry if this is a lot but I have a friend with OCD who has legit panic attacks over stuff like this#Like they have to throw out a ripped plastic grocery bag they've had for six years instead of using it to weave yard furniture or smthn#And they'd go into a spiral about killing the planet#So like#I have strong feelings now
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