#'although they wish their father had a more private life' (always trying to remember that when fan page posting)
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Photos by Henry Diltz, Richard E. Aaron, © LIFE/Shutterstock, and Nurit Wilde. (Photos 4 & 5 are from the “Heart and Soul” video shoot.)
For Father’s Day. Thoughts go out to Peter’s kids.
“I was never inherently afraid of my situation. When I found myself in a boardinghouse with my daughter in a room for twenty-five dollars a month, sleeping on a mat on the floor, I was not discouraged. I had already made my connection with my source.” - Peter Tork, When The Music Mattered (1984)
“[Hallie and Ivan] go to an alternative school locally. We [Peter and Barbara Iannoli] decided on it because it’s a place where if the kids wanted to do something they can insist on it. My kids have whale watching classes where they rent a boat and go and watch whales. I have never seen it, but they tell me it is a transcendental experience.” - Peter Tork, Evening Standard, July 26, 1983
Rosie O’Donnell: “You think you’re a good dad or do you…?” Peter: “No, actually, I’m not a very good, no, not as a good as I want to be. But then, I don’t know any dad who is, so...” Rosie: “That’s true, that’s true. I’m sure you do very well.” - VH1, late 1988
“Tork’s children don’t think of his celebrity one way or another, he said, although they wish their father had a more private life. ‘They take the bitter with the sweet,’ he said adding that he’s just Dad ‘in large measures.’ His 26-year-old daughter is pursuing a teaching degree. His 20-year-old son is a drummer in a reggae band
. ‘I am so impressed with him that way,’ Tork said, pride evident. ‘I wish he’d put his back to it more; he’d get more out of it, but you can’t tell someone something like that. They learn from what you do, not what you say.’” - Intelligencer Journal, July 19, 1996
Peter Tork: “David [Crosby] let me stay there for most of a year. It was sort of by way of interest on the loan I gave him to buy his boat, and I stayed there with my, with my then-girlfriend, and our daughter was born in that house.” Q: “In the house?” PT: “In the house, yeah, live, at-home birth —” Q: “On purpose or you just…?” PT: “That’s right, at-home birth, yeah, that was what we wanted.” Q: “(to Peter) [The second radio host is] expecting a baby. His wife.” PT: “Yeah? Cool! Oh, man. Oh, yeah? Excited, aren’t you? His eyes just brightened up, it’s great.” - GOLD 104.5, 1999
Q: “You have good relationships with your kids?”
Peter Tork: “Yes, I do.” Q: “Oh, cool.” PT: “Very good. [...] [O]f my two daughters, the adult daughter says that she has a better relationship with me than any of her friends have with their fathers. It’s a good thing for us, and I hope that the others aren’t catastrophic. Because otherwise, it means (laughs), otherwise it’s small praise. But, you know, yeah, we’re doing fine, it’s wonderful.” - WDBB, February 2006
“[After his first cancer surgery, says Peter] ‘I couldn’t chew anything for a month. I was drinking my dinner — lots of milkshakes.’ It also took time for Peter to fully get back the power of speech. ‘For months, I was speaking with a lisp,’ he says. ‘It was a matter of me learning how to get my tongue under control again. I did my vocal exercises and the doctors decided I didn’t need speech therapy. It was a tough time but my daughter, Hallie, was a real support to me.’” - Daily Mail, August 16, 2011
From about the 8:36 min. mark, Peter speaks about Hallie and Ivan (who was in the audience) in this portion of The Monkees on People Are Talking in 1989; also featuring a tour anecdote about Ivan from Davy.
#Peter Tork#Reine Stewart#Hallie Iannoli#Tork quotes#60s Tork#70s Tork#90s Tork#00s Tork#Ivan Iannoli#Erica Thorkelson#so much respect for PT#bearded Peter#Barbara Iannoli#Jennifer McLeod#long read#<3#more for the solid Tork advice files#'although they wish their father had a more private life' (always trying to remember that when fan page posting)#When The Music Mattered#Evening Standard#Intelligencer Journal#WGLD Radio#can you queue it
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"You're a selfish person, Lily" Severus had said. Now Lily couldn't stop crying at his words. Because he couldn't be more wrong. Lily was no selfish. Anything but selfish.
Lily was constantly thinking about others. She praised her sister like an idol, although Petunia didn't appreciate it. She had a lot of pressure on her shoulders. Being the only one of the family to go to a private school, put her on the spotlight. Even if she didn't want to. Aunts, and Uncles, even cousins kept asking her about her posh school. They congratulated her for doing good, which made Petunia constantly angry with her.
Lily had to do the impossible to keep impecable grades to keep her scholarship. Even that stopped her from enjoying things like a normal teenager. She was praised by teachers for doing her homework and not breaking the rules. Lily knew she was constantly compared with the rich students. She had to try ten times harder than them. Because she depended on scholarships. And that stressed her out.
Lily was constantly giving advice to others. Somehow she was always the shoulder to cry on. Most of the girls told her their love stories or their issues with their boyfriends. And Lily tried to play nice and listen, talk to them even if she had never have a boyfriend before. Even if she'd never been in love.
It was always about Mary and her being the center of attention amongst boys. Because she was pretty and confident. Something Lily would never be.
It was always about Marlene and her constant energy, her ability to be the rebel one and break the rules and be cool. Always the type of girl that defied misogyny, and stupid toxic men. Lily was not as brave as her.
It was always about Alice and her extraordinary love life with Frank. Alice was like the protagonist of a romcon, the princess that had found her prince. Lily was jealous of how beautiful, delicate and perfect she was. And how she wished she could live a love story for herself.
It was also always about Remus. Lily worrying about him not thinking himself enough. Lily knew he was treated differently and he was always giving too much of his heart but wasn't treated like he deserved. But also, Lily was tired of Remus trying to convince her to give Potter a chance.
And Potter only asking her out as a joke, because she was a silly game for him. How could he like her this much? Lily was not that attractive anyway, not like other girls. Although sometimes Lily felt guilty for rejecting him because he was accused of being a prude for not giving Potter a chance. Any boy for that matter. And Lily didn't know what it was or what he looked on a boy but she didn't feel sparks for any of them.
And it was always kids like Sirius Black (or sometimes some Slytherins) who called her a snob or a boring nerd for maintaining the rules and trying to get them to do the right thing. She was not a privileged girl who could ask her father to donate some money to the school to keep her in.
Lily had prefect meetings, and classes, and homework, and friends asking to talk to her or asking for her help.
Lily had to be right, perfect and studious for school but she also had to be a cool teenager who had fun, drank occasionally and pretended to be too busy to be snogging around. But also wishing she was snogging around.
It was too much, actually. Lily didn't even remember when was the last time she had some spare time for herself.
Now Severus accused her of being selfish only because she (God forbid) started being friendly with James Potter and the rest of the boys. After everything Lily had done for Severus especially. All the advice, all the support, all the love she had given him. How much she had wanted to protect him from his horrible father. But she had stand a lot. Severus had lied and manipulated her. He was the real monster. Lily realized now that he never liked her. He was just obsessed with her.
"Lilybean" her father would say if he was still alive "When do you have time for yourself? When do you matter? Sometimes it is fine to be a bit selfish, you know?"
Lily could hear his voice perfectly in her head.
"You know what, Sev?" Lily answered "Perhaps I am being selfish for the first time in my life. So what? Maybe I want to clean the trash in my life and only be left with good people and good friends..."
"Yeah, me...I am a good friend, Lily. Not them"
"No, you are the trash" Lily snapped "And now I want to be clean. We are done, Severus"
She walked away ignoring her ex friend's calls. And for the first time, she tried not to feel guilty about leaving him behind.
#Happy birthday to my precious girl#Honestly when someone says something bad about her I go feral#She is such a strong character and could easily be a good protagonist#But she is always left aside#marauders#marauders era#Muggle AU#lily evans#lily flower#asexual lily evans#demiromantic lily evans#but also falling in love with James when she gets closer to him gets to know him better and realizes how good he is
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Chapter 12 - Troubles
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London in December 1921. Patton Senior. died at the start of December.
I legally inherited 60% of his property prior to his passing. He can only watch annexation and acquisition from his bed. I witnessed my entire life's work being destroyed. Along with all of my nominal relatives, I went to his funeral.
No tears were shed. This ritual resembled the marble coffin he picked out for himself. Although luxurious, it was icy and emotionless. taste. Actually, George and Helen might not have been born if you were a boy. ". William spoke to me in such a calm manner. This is extremely uncommon. I either remember a domineering, haughty, or inebriated William.
Since I was a young child, I've envied you. I wish I was as smart as you, but I'm jealous of how much my father adores you. Despite being much younger than I am, you can do it with ease. The questions my father gave me to answer were simple for me. Despite my best efforts, I was unable to overtake you. I believe. Reply Share Add Follow Report. I begged my father to listen to me, but all he did was compliment you. His treasure is you alone. He was always so distant from me. Face. Even George's father didn't take him very seriously, in case you missed it. ".
So you immerse yourself in a vat of wine and confront your father everywhere. I had to make fun of him. William continued to speak to himself while ignoring my sarcasm, gazing off into the distance. He said, "I was very confused when my father died.
I was at a loss when I suddenly understood that after all these years, all I had done was cause trouble everywhere and make my father ill. Down. ".
"That's not completely accurate. You also have a child who was murdered before he was even born. ". I know, he paused, and he turned to face me. I know. I'm sure you'll never forget that maid. ".
She has a name! Her name is Mary Smith! She was even expecting your child, I sneered, "That maid," I couldn't help but sneer. You killed her, my wife, you beat her to death once more, you raped her, and you don't even remember her name. She was a poor Christian, forced to carry your evil seed, forced to suffer both physical and mental torture. She cannot have an abortion.
"Don't claim that you want to alter your behavior and are sorry for the past. When Mary asked where I was, I pointed to the south. Go talk to her and see if she will forgive you, my sister commanded, as she erected a tomb.
After saying that, I quickly walked away from him. I'm so sick that I actually believe a bastard who has existed for almost 30 years can change his ways! Jenny, have you called?
I had a little lightheadedness from the red wine at the party, so I stumbled and fell on the sofa, kicking one of my shoes off. "No, Madame Baroness. Jenny is a sweet-natured Celtic girl with blue eyes that are round and adorable. very small freckles. I had my other shoe removed by her. "oh……". I am somewhat. No, I'm completely lost.
I've written to Tommy to inform him that I'm now a baroness and that Turner House, 10 King's Road, Chelsea, is now legally my property. private residence. He received my phone number and postal address. I even mentioned Turner to him in the letter.
The Baroness is very well-liked in the social scene of London, and her suitors come and go like crucian carp in a river. All I want is for Thomas Shelby to call me, be envious of me, and use nice words to try to get me to confess my love for him. He didn't, though. ". I became very upset, pouted, and curled up on the couch. Tommy once claimed that I was more addictive to him than opiates, but in actuality, I was the one who was dependent on him. Every night I engaged in conversation and laughter at balls in London, dealt with various wealthy individuals every day, and interacted with a wide range of people.
Suitors. I was disoriented and intoxicated as I walked, and I couldn't stop thinking about him. There were one or two social interactions that were intolerable. I even considered eloping with my possessions back to Birmingham while in court.
But I am unable. I've made the decision to take over as Baron Turner and inherit everything from my father. But I figured I could treat myself to a holiday for Christmas. Just as I had done when I fled London seven years prior, I traversed the streets of Birmingham while toting my compact suitcase. Yet this.
I didn't have Finn to drive me home this time. The London affair was nearly over when I secretly flew back to Birmingham. I want to make Christmas special for my little prince. surprise.
I arrived at the horse racing betting station as snowflakes fell from the sky. Miss, tomorrow is Christmas. I'm planning to arrive early tomorrow to wager on the horse races. We'll end now. "I recognized the voice.
John is here. He grinned with surprise as I glanced up at him. "Diana!". We gave each other hugs. I was working in the kitchen with Polly and the others when Tommy returned home.
"Thomas didn't say it, but my dear, I believe he wanted to see you when he traveled to London so aggressively. " Polly. told me while grinning.
I laughed as I dipped my head. The look on Tommy's face if he realized Polly had exposed him is something I'm really curious to see. I heard John say "Tommy!" and grabbed the salad bowl as I exited the kitchen.
Across the dining table, we were just staring at one another. He took over Kenpo's business successfully and without incident, as he claimed in his letter. This is all. I still find his blue eyes fascinating even though his cheeks have gotten paler over time. I observed as the surprise gradually gave way to tenderness in his eyes. I blush and feel my heart race just from his soft gaze. A look is much better than a thousand words because it is so full of love and meaning.
Arthur popped his head out from behind him, "Tommy, what are you doing here?" He became hesitant when he saw me. "All right Tommy, you have plenty of time to examine Diana in more detail. John pushed Tommy while grinning. As I watched these men fight and push each other like immature children, I grinned. I went backwards and walked. cooking area.
This smell is what home smells like. Tommy moved into a larger home after earning a lot of money. His bedroom also expanded, and the bed did as well. yes. He rolled off of me and fell asleep next to me once the rain stopped and the clouds parted.
I still held him and tried to get into his arms even though the love just now had taken too much of my energy. Tommy exhaled and gave me a tight hug while kissing my skin and face.
Do you intend to leave? "Maybe. After all, the Turner family in Chelsea still has a lot of face. I murmured as I lay in his arms. "I. The brothers have tarnished the sterling reputation of our Turner family, which dates back to George I and has endured for many generations. through misbehavior.
The men in my family can only cause trouble, and then they will—William, who is well-known in London, and George, who isn't even an adult but has an illegitimate son. The mess-making is done by women. ". However, I'll most likely depart at the end of January. I turned my head up and gave him a chin kiss. "You're welcome to visit me anytime in London.
10 King's Road in Chelsea. Little prince, my dear. ". He had a fresh wound on his chest when I rubbed myself in his arms. It appeared to have been shot. I quickly stepped away from his arms out of fear that I would press his wound, and I used my fingers to gently circle the scar. Admire him. It must hurt awfully bad. Why did that happen. Didn't you say you had no skin injuries? ".
What's wrong with the wound on your hand? Tommy asked as he grabbed my hand and kissed it. "I was. "I did the burning myself.
However, I was afraid to say that to him. Even though we are very close, Tommy's expression of rage still makes me very impressed. It's peculiar. It's frightening, and I can't take his "punishment" any longer. After a brief period of silence, I realized that he had changed the topic. The subject should not even be brought up again. "It's a minor injury. A long time ago, everything was fine. I kept it from you. He gestured with his hand up, playing with my hair. "Explain your hands to me. ". "I……".
I was mortified as I looked into his probing eyes. But I was only able to go into great detail about my time in London. Of course, I forgot about the young men who flocked to me day after day.
I grew increasingly uneasy as I watched Tommy's expression of silence; surely he wouldn't get angry again? "I suddenly felt bad for letting you go. He gave me a big bear hug while he sighed. I stood up and kissed Tommy on the mouth, saying, "But I'm back, aren't I?
I gave him a direct look and said, "Tommy, I want you to tell me everything in the future and not keep it from me.". Eyes: "Whether it's accidents or anything else, financial difficulties or domestic problems. You got it all, Tommy.everything. You are always aware of what I can share with you. ". We just exchanged silent looks. Before he slowly nodded.
In Birmingham, I had a wonderful Christmas vacation. Every day, talk about the newest London fashion with Polly and Ismey. The kids talk about interesting things that happened in London before spending the night with my little prince.
"The dictator of Little Hiss and his troubled demon queen. ". I suddenly recalled my old moniker. I tried to speak clearly despite the fact that I was panting and lying beneath Tommy. Chu.
After hearing this, Thomas just chuckled and put more effort into demonstrating his "excessive debauchery.". The Baroness appears to have many suitors. Was it successful in finding the goddess? He was consuming the port wine I had brought back while seated at the other end of the tub.
I leisurely poured myself a glass of wine and asked, "Are you jealous?". "A beautiful, wealthy single woman. If a young woman marries, she will inherit a sizable amount of property and the title of baroness without any elders to make careless comments. this. Such a baroness would not attract any suitors who would be concerned with her virginity. ". I put down the wine glass in my hand and sat in the bathtub, asking, "So, is Mr. Shelby also interested in this Baroness?".
She shifted slightly in front of him before leaning forward and placing her hand on the inside of his thigh, just beneath the foam. His knees were nearly in contact with my breasts. I observed his Adam's apple rolling with pleasure.
"Per your request, my dear. Baroness. ".
I had to return to London once the holidays were over.
Cold, lonesome, and empty. After a brief trip back to Birmingham, I found 10 King Street to be progressively more intolerable. Home. There are still a lot of servants here, and occasionally young talents from London come to see me. However, in my opinion, it is still fair. Family honor has trapped me like a cold cage.
I didn't feel alive again until I occasionally traveled to Birmingham, and only then did I experience true emotion. only.
At that point, I no longer felt like a lifeless prisoner of familial honor, but rather like a living being. doll for a puppet.
It's possible that people were offended by the way I treated the young men, which led to the spread of unfavorable rumors about me. smell.
Some claim that my health is the reason why my suitors are so eager, while others assert that I did certain things during the five years I spent living away from London.
I once worked as a prostitute, and some claim that I frequently skip dances because I have business meetings with my financial backers; they fear that I will one day take over that profession from them. They believe that I paid for it with my body because of the financial sponsor.
Some insiders claim that I left London to meet my lover, a black man, and that they obtained this information from unidentified sources. Help the boss out.
To be completely honest, I was quite intrigued when I first heard those ridiculous rumors, just like when I heard a stranger's joke. Thus, urban legends are still used in London. But because I knew they were getting closer to reality, I finally became irate. How would you rate my little prince?
I asked Attorney Collins, my head spinning, "Can I sue them?". It is theoretically feasible, Madam Baroness. But these rumors are so pervasive that you can't even, he scowled in shame.
I have no idea where they came from. Furthermore, you cannot begin it one at a time once it has been spread by too many people. sue. ".
Such a mess. I clenched my fists, closed my eyes, and made an effort to restrain my rage. The same issue affects men who can have affairs with women of all social classes and even have children out of wedlock before getting hitched. Just a few jokes, really. However, because my lover is a Birmingham commoner, I, Baroness Turner, will be raped. to which.
I just did the same thing as those men, not even as extreme as them, but I was the subject of unending rumors. Slandered.
"Whore. heh. ". I believe I know who is responsible. At a ball held at Buckingham Palace, I first met my sister, Helen Burgess.
I had just said hello to Mr. Dot Churchill and had the first dance before that. He told me that my brother's passing had caused him grief.
I apologize, and congrats on acquiring the title successfully. I went to my sister's spot on the corner after the dance and sat down. Indeed, I overheard some people saying on the way. Mr. Churchill and I were involved in an affair.
I was a flower girl at Mr. Churchill's wedding; they are such creative people. Nevertheless, these politicians have morals.
Very flexible, but there is no real reason for someone to have sex with the young daughter of his former colleague, just like he did with his own daughter when she was a child. a young female.
"Your husband must have worked very hard to gain entry. Using your maiden name would have made it simple to invite you. Do enter. "I drank some champagne.
He is my husband. I looked in Helen's direction as she stubbornly raised her head. The congressman Burgess is collaborating. The wife of the Lord of the Admiralty flirted with, more accurately. flattered.
a man who utilizes his lover as a means of power. In fact, Councilor Burgess visited me after I was made a baroness. I don't even know who gave him this assurance. Face, we didn't get along during the inheritance argument just now. You are free to approach me as an equal after you lose. I offered to support his career and be his lover. I sipped more champagne and remained silent, only turning to look at Senator Burgess. I will only bargain with those who can speak to me in order to capture the thief and the king. There's no need for me to intervene, though, because he provoked Mr. Churchill. Ordinary scandals are just something to talk about after dinner. Men won't give them a second thought, and they'll even use them as medals to show it.
I have endless charm. But when these have an impact on their lives and careers, they will abruptly abandon them. The rumors' development has simply been sped up by me. Indeed, Mr. Churchill couldn't stay still and stood up to correct those false facts.
words. Additionally, society also ignored those foolish, chatty women who fell for Senator Burgess' charms.
I at last experienced my usual peace and quiet after the London social season ended. even though I've handled these storms well. I spent the night returning to Birmingham because I was still feeling very upset.
Tommy was headed to London to meet me because he had heard the rumors. He once more set the bag down in his hand when he saw me approaching the door. plum.
"Tommy. why not wed me right away. ". I feel extremely resentful and resentful when I consider those "whispering words" that nearly punctured my spine. if it was. Birmingham, if anyone had dared to do this to me, I would have shot them all. "Dani, you are the Baroness," Tommy said while wiping away my tears and kissing my lips. ".
"I don't give a damn! I don't give a damn! Tommy, I just want you. ". I felt more wronged the more I sobbed, and the more I sobbed, the more I wanted to cry. I behaved childishly as I lay in Tommy's arms and resisted getting up.
Until I eventually stopped crying, he quietly hugged me. "Dani, I can't let the last two years' worth of your labor go to waste. Turner, not Diana, is who you are now. ". Lord. ".
"I regret it, Tommy. I regret it. ". Tommy and I would have wed, had kids, and I would have been well-known if I had still been Diana Turner. Sincere Shelby, please. However, I can now have sex with various men before getting married because I am Baroness Turner. Love, but I couldn't date a Birmingham gangster. "Honey, you were acting irate. Tommy gave me a kiss. Of course, I still recall why I chose to make the effort to become a baroness and why I initially decided to return to London. A London baroness wife will play a role when Tommy starts to expand to London, which is a more crucial factor.
In terms of both financial and political support, it is very important. I wish I could do more for my partner. I want to be more than just his quiet hometown; I want to walk alongside him.
Thomas managed to calm me down, but I was still reluctant to leave. Though old grudges make me, I still recall my duties. had no choice but to flee for a while. He was powerless to stop me, and so he agreed to let me keep doing what I was doing before. "Tommy, you're rich now, and a baroness works for you as your secretary. ", said Arthur. An infectious disease claimed the life of Ada's husband, Freddie Thorne.
Thomas, who was once friends with Thorne, spoke at his funeral as promised and was sincere afterwards. Ada was invited to bring Carl and live with him at his house. Ada was unconcerned. Since she was no longer Shelby or Thorne, she claimed to be free. I was compelled to give her a bear hug after recognizing the tremor in her voice.
Ada and Thorne got married out of love, but they were divorced for a long time because of unimportant issues and conflicts. The sporadic running-in nevertheless transformed the vivacious young woman into a frazzled single mother. She was angry, but I could tell she was feeling relieved.
I want Ada to know that even though she hasn't forgiven Tommy yet, we will always be related. The seven-year itch, that is. As I turned to look at Thomas after watching Ada walk away, I muttered, ". "us. Should this occur again in the future? As soon as we were combined with honey, we did not think twice about leaving our family; today, we are disgusted with one another and feel relieved.
Tommy gave me a puzzled look as if he were attempting to understand what was going through my mind. There's no need for you to fret all the time. Tommy gave me an irritated glare. "It's something you want, isn't it? I'll return to London the following day. I tried to change the subject while lowering my head to avoid his stare. "Um. ". "Give me Ada's address, and I'll look after her in London," he said. ". "Um. ". ". ". ". ". ". Tommy, I adore you. ". "……Um. ". Once more, he grinned. It's like a young child who needs to be encouraged when he's upset!
#cillian murphy#tommy shelby#tommy shelby x reader#peaky blinders#thomas shelby#peaky blinders fanfiction#tommy shelby imagine#fanfiction#thomas shelby x reader#tommy shelby fanfic
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⸻ Lilou stuck out her tongue when Lady Tremaine said her daughters were prettier. Liz was half-present and half in her own mind when she realized the gaze had gone all on her. ⎯ They were circling her around, and the Aussie looking at the ugly sisters. ❛ Uh, because…Were you two vultures in another life? ❜ Liz responded to one of them in a teasing tone too, she knew they were just being theatrical, although she was blushing. And then, they repeated the question she couldn't come up with an immediate answer. ‘what kind of princess are you?’ Drizella asked circling her curiously as the twins looked like mini bodyguards and Lilou. Thankfully, her man answered quickly. Upon the singing invitation. ❛ I can try. ❜ If there is something Elizabeth was good at was singing too. ❛ Anything then? ❜ Lady Tremaine nodded her head. Elizabeth did not know if she should sing any of the other's princess songs, but decided to go with one… ❛ Dancing bears, painted wings… Things I almost remember… And a song, someone sings… Once upon a Deceembeer…❜ Liz starts to singing beautifully with her voice of 'angel', and the twins turned to look at her singing. And all the ugly sisters rose a brow, as now the eyes all fully focused on her. ❛ Someone holds me safe and warm, horses prance through a silver storm… ❜ And now the passerby stop by to watch her singing, and she gave a step backward to stay nearly behind Alex. ❛ Figures dancing gracefully… Across my memories. ❜ And then she continued the music, trying imagine the instrumentals in her head but her voice followed in perfect timing. ❛ Someone holds me safe and warm… Horses prance through a silver storm, figures dancing gracefully across my memory, faaar away, long ago, glowing dim as ambeeer, things my heart used to know, things it yearns to remember… ❜ A quickly breath and went on to finish the song… ❛ And a song someone siiings, once upon a deceembeeer…. ❜ She finished the song and realized there were actually more people than it was before, clapping to her, but even the all the trio Tremaines ladies were lowkey jaw-dropped, trying to stay in character, impressed with what they just heard. It brought her memories when she sang on the streets or metro to get a few tips. Every time the Aussie sings, she always puts her soul in her voice. She watched them put the bow on her head… ❛ Thank you. ❜ She says for Drizella, and Lilou also thanks the lady, and Beau jumps to get in her arms again.
After the pictures were taken, and the ugly sisters were gone. ❛ Wow, what just happened! ❜ Picking up her son in her arms, but got exhausted in carrying him. As the rest of the characters came along, fortunately, they were less chaotic, as the villains ( some of them ) , Elizabeth was very happy to meet Alice and also Snow White. The fireworks show of Peter Pan was beautiful, but she could sense it was startling a bit the twins. Beau arms pressed tight around her neck, and Liz had to loose his embrace, smoothing his back. ❛ Alex, I think we should go, I'm kinda hungry. ❜ Contrary to her twins who stopped by and ate early, Elizabeth only stopped to hydrate herself. The last time she ate was breakfast because even the rest of the snack of Lilou wasn't enough, it was only two bites to finish it ( since her daughter ate basically everything ) . Liz was also tired, all-time picking the twins up and down in her arms, apart from the park was huge, and walking a lot, waiting a bit in some of the queues even having the fast pass with their VIP bracelets.
And she was happy they brought the stroller, otherwise she'd struggle in carrying their shopping bags home. She also purchases a few things too, more like 'home decor'. Beau hid his face in the crook of her neck, and holding the strap of her yellow shirt, sucking his pacifier falling asleep. Liz wished her father was here in France too, he loves his home country, and she could go on a date private with Alex, without the twins.
——despite tears welling up in his big blue eyes, it was rather surprising that Beau didn’t cry or throw a tantrum over Gaston’s approach to Liz; he has always been possessive of Liz, jealous of her being close to any man, Alex included, but he became a tad more clingy after the incident. it was probably equal parts unexpected how the interaction had not lit the, inarguably short, fuse, given how prone Alex is to be set off, like in a snap of one’s fingers. or in a blink. in fairness, this wouldn’t have been the case if this wasn’t a Disney character who was supposed to act like this ( to an acceptable extent, of course ) and it was a random guy chatting her up —he probably would have had a harder time being in the good sense to think twice before dealing with him. Beau still seemed vexed with Gaston even as they took a photo with him, his little hand firmly holding on to Liz’s own as they walked away; only to be met by the chaotic duo and Lady Tremaine. ‘oh!’ the both sisters exclaimed when Liz pointed out that it was Queen Elsa. he stroke Lou’s hair as she pouted, offended by the woman’s words, and Lady Tremaine clicked her tongue at her. ‘no one is prettier than my girls though,’ she said pointedly, just as the sisters screamed and approached them.
Drizella smiled at him before turning to Liz, but he couldn’t help laughing at Beau shyly rejecting Anastasia, who gasped and stomped her foot on the ground. ‘you won’t find anyone prettier than me,’ she sulked too, like Lilou had, crossing her arms too, before focusing her attention on Liz. the older sister made a face at Lilou’s words, huffing as she grabbed both Alex’s and Liz’s hands and put them together. the lack of reaction from Beau was quite surprising, but he continued holding on to Liz’s other hand, looking at the ugly sisters. ‘but I want a prince! mother!’ and she stomped her foot too, moving to look at Liz again, just as her sister had done a moment ago. they teased her with the mother joining in and looking at her up and down, eyes narrowed slightly. ‘why are you awake?’ Drizella screeched, and then they all laughed in that ugly sound, so theatrical too, as they teased her again, comparing her to Alice. ‘what princess is this?’ Anastasia asked when she said her name was Elizabeth. and they all laughed again, in that high-pitched tone. ‘what kind of princess are you?’ Drizella asked circling her curiously. the twins stood before them, almost like bodyguards, which was hilarious and endearing at the same time. Alex wrapped an arm around her, pulling her closer, sensing she was a little shy with all the teasing and attention focused on her. “a rich one,” he told Drizella and she gasped before crying out. ‘mother!’ she ran off, and Anastasia continued looking at her. ‘can you sign beautifully though like us?’ and then the older sister came back, hands behind her back as the two of them started singing, without any harmony in their voices, completely off tone; people laughed. ‘skill!’ Drizella said proudly once they finished their song, and then she moved closer and put a big green bow on Liz’s head, on top of the Minnie ears she had already. ‘ain’t no princess with a tiny bow!’ and then she put a smaller, but still too big for her head, blue bow on Lilou’s head. ‘you are welcome!’
Anastasia took the autograph book out of Liz’s hands and the three of them flipped through it, grimacing at each character’s signature, giggling girlishly at Flynn’s and fanning themselves at Gaston’s. and they all signed too before passing it back, ‘you are welcome! again!’ Anastasia said with high-pitched giggles. and then she took her phone and handed it to Alex as the three of them gathered around Liz and the twins and posed, hilariously and exaggerating each one. and Drizella reached for the phone again, but Alex pulled his hand back, smoothly enough and she glared at him. ‘Cinderella!’ Lady Termaine screeched, pointing a little girl out in the crowd dressed as the character and the sisters screamed before running off towards the family.
he handed Liz back her phone, thinking he would need a day to recover from the absolute chaos of these interactions. running a hand along the length of her back, he rested his hand around her waist as he walked beside her. Alice, whom they met after was, thankfully, not chaotic and loud, and the twins enjoyed meeting her, too. Snow White stopped to talk to them, bowing when she noticed Beau’s costume and kneeling to be on their level as she spoke to them. they took the twins to watch the parade and the fireworks show, which first startled Lilou a little, and Beau asked to be held by his mom, also a little taken aback form the sound. It was getting dark as the Peter Pan show started, and he held Lilou up to have a better view of it. the twins were tired though, rubbing at their eyes but still watching the fireworks in awe.
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Things Left Unsaid -- An Analysis of Rei & Touya
Apparently Rei has been getting a lot of flack lately, all of it undeserved, and since I had a post analyzing her relationship with Touya in the works already, I figured no time like the present.
Disclaimer #1: There are a lot of issues with the writing for Rei’s character that have nothing to do with her and everything to do with how the storyline is using her, which I will address and examine.
Disclaimer #2: I’m someone who, while always curious as to what kind of relationship Rei had with her oldest son before he died, never thought it would be revealed that Touya was close to his mom. I don’t think you get the Dabi we see in Chapters 290-295 without him being so warped by his relationship with his father yet so dependent on his attention that he was willing to kill his brother and himself simply for his father’s acknowledgement.
But that’s what I find so interesting about Rei and Touya -- it’s a relationship that mainly consists of regrets and things left unsaid. There isn’t the anger or resentment Dabi feels for Endeavor, because that intense level of emotion sprung from the loss of the father who used to be his whole world. His feelings toward his mother seem more amicable, but also more distant.
And while she could’ve done some things differently in regards to her oldest, I want to make it clear that the distance between them was very much by design.
After all, Touya was the end goal of their marriage. It was never any secret as to why Enji wanted to marry her and to some extent Rei must’ve realized that this child was not meant to be hers: the child was the transaction, the thing she was needed to create, to give to her husband. Of course she loved Touya and was likely his primary caregiver for most of his life, but there was no doubt that once his quirk manifested and he could begin his hero training, his life would be dominated by his father. Which is what happened.
Here, I would like to point out something I noticed in the flashback chapters. We never see any panels of Enji alone with any of his children during their infancy -- even with Shouto, the perfect child he longed for, we see Rei holding Shouto, sitting by him as he sleeps. Enji is there tangentially. Once Shouto begins his training, that is when we see him with his father.
So to see Enji with Touya when he was a baby, prior to his quirk manifesting, strikes me as a big deal. But it makes sense if you remember that he’d placed all his hopes, dreams and expectations on his firstborn. Initially, it doesn’t look like he even considered the possibility that Touya wouldn’t be his successor or that his little eugenics experiment would fail; this was his first, most optimistic attempt at a masterpiece. So I don’t believe it’s far-fetched to see him spend more time with Touya right off the bat (it’s what will make the eventual abandonment all the more crushing).
However, Rei isn’t seen at all in the snippet of Touya’s infancy, despite us knowing she was relegated to the caregiver role. Rei is literally out of the picture. Compare this to how she features prominently in Shouto’s infancy or how we see her holding a baby Natsuo. You could argue that, hey, we don’t see her holding a baby Fuyumi either, but there’s other scenes where Fuyumi’s attached to her mother’s hip or crying over her being hurt. Things that suggest a closeness, when the only scene we get of just her and Touya is one where they’re at odds.
As we move further into Touya’s childhood, though, Rei becomes the only voice we hear advocate for him against his father. I’m referencing two specific instances:
When Enji coerces her into having more children to replace Touya now that his father has deemed him a failure, something she knows will hurt their son deeply.
And after Touya lashes out at Shouto, which Rei doesn’t blame on Touya, but rather on his father. She delivers such a satisfying condemnation of his actions, probably the most cutting one Endvr’s received to date, and it so accurately sums up one of his major character flaws.
How can you call yourself a hero when you can’t even face your own son?
The tragedy of it all is that Rei never said any of this in front of Touya -- it was always said in private, just to her husband. That alone took courage, yes, but it would’ve meant everything to Touya to hear her condemn his father aloud. Instead when she does speak to him, she says this:
It’s why I can’t wrap my head around that scene in Ch 302, where after Enji admits he didn’t know what to say to Touya, Rei replies, “Neither did I.”
When we’re shown in flashbacks during that same chapter that she did understand her son. “He just wants to be acknowledged by you” is quite the indication that she, at the very least, understood the cause of Touya’s turmoil even if she couldn’t fully relate to it herself. So why can’t she say any of this to him?
The answer is in the way she addresses Touya, as it is nearly identical to how Nao addresses Tenko in this scene:
Both Touya and Tenko grew up in similar households: the father had all the power, physical and financial, so the mothers were left to try and comfort their children in a way that didn’t go against their husbands’ desires -- and so, to use Tenko’s own words, they would “reject them with kindness.”
So it’s no wonder that Touya lashes out at his mother after she suggests he pursue other things. He isn’t five like Tenko was, he’s thirteen and has a much clearer understanding of why she says this and why it’s a bit hypocritical, since he’s aware of her situation, too.
Just as she was bound by her family, who wanted her to marry Endvr for the money and status, he’s bound by the expectations of his family. I’m not sure if I’ve seen anyone else touch on this detail, but when Touya states that he knows his grandparents sold his mom into marriage so his dad could have a child, we could infer that Touya knows enough to realize that his mother might not have necessarily wanted him.
Not him specifically, but any child — the story has neglected to flesh her out beyond her marriage and motherhood, so we have no idea if Rei wanted to become a mother prior to this arrangement, despite how much she loves her kids now — although it is possible that he might’ve internalized it this way.
So you have Touya, who at least knows with certainty that his father wanted him to exist, yet he comes to understand that his father only wants him if he can meet a specific set of expectations, and if he cannot, he’ll be discarded. If he can’t surpass All Might, he can’t fulfill his reason for existing and his father will have to replace him. So to have his mother urge him to follow a path other than becoming a hero would mean, to Touya, accepting that he is the mistake he fears he is. Of course he isn’t going to respond well to that.
I don’t like when people try to compare Touya’s reaction in this moment to Shouto’s when Rei tells him he isn’t bound by his father’s blood, using that to paint Shouto as the “good” child and Touya as the “bad” one. They didn’t react differently because of any innate sense of goodness or lack thereof -- they reacted differently because the situations are different.
Telling Shouto that he didn’t have to be like his father comforted Shouto, who only knew his father as the bully who hurt his mom. He associated his father, and his father’s fire, with all of that fear and pain -- and thus, he associated the part of himself that took after his father with those feelings. She wasn’t denying his dream of becoming a hero, only assuring him that when he became a hero it could be whatever kind of hero he chose to be, that he wasn’t doomed to be like his father.
Whereas what she tells Touya sounds a lot like what his father told him, which was to give up on being a hero and pursue other aspirations.
Encouraging Shouto to become his own version of a hero still falls in line with what Endvr ultimately wants, which is for Shouto to be a hero capable of surpassing All Might. Whereas this is what happens when Touya continues to train to do that against his father’s wishes:
This is where the framing begins to bother me and where Rei’s characterization becomes inconsistent.
So in this scene from Ch 302, we see Enji abusing his wife for “letting” Touya continue to train, punishing her for her “failure” to stop him. Obviously, none of that is Rei’s fault. If anything, Enji would be more responsible for preventing Touya from hurting himself since he’s the reason his son is hurting himself in the first place.
Moreover, the fact that he hits Rei over this sort of muddies the water of an previously-established narrative. Since the Sports Festival arc, we’ve known that Endvr abused his wife because she tried to interfere with Shouto’s training. It got to the point where she was terrified of her husband and it drove her to a breakdown. Why introduce this new aspect to the abuse, when it was already established that a) he was physically abusive and b) his motivations for abusing her were explicit to the audience?
I’m not saying it doesn’t make sense that a man who hits his wife for one reason could find another reason to do it and justify his actions to himself. And while the scene does portray Endvr in a bad light to show how wrong his actions are, literally draping his figure in shadow, why does it even dare to suggest the idea that Rei was remiss in her duties as a mother? Again, the scene isn’t even necessary, since the narrative has long-since showed the audience that Enji abused his wife.
By itself, the scene would read as further exploration of how Rei was victimized and how it affected her children. When you look at it with the chapter as a whole, though? Remember, this is the chapter where Rei claims that all of the family shares the blame in what happened to Touya, displacing some of the blame that rightfully rests on Enji.
But my major gripe with this scene is how it reframes the sole moment we get of Rei and Touya alone. Because we know that Rei understands Touya, based on her confrontations with her husband in Ch 301 & 302. Rather than encourage him to be what he wants or acknowledge that his father is in the wrong, however, her advice falls in line with what Enji wants -- to stop Touya from training. And this comes after a scene where we see Enji beat his wife when she doesn’t stop Touya from training.
With all that in mind, it could potentially be read as Rei trying stop Touya for the sake of protecting herself and the family -- I don’t think it’s coincidence that in the scene where he hits her that we see Shouto, Fuyumi & Natsuo all as witnesses who are very distressed by what’s happening to their mother -- at the cost of Touya’s need to be validated. And if executed well or at least better than it has here, that wouldn’t be a bad choice of narrative per se, and it would fit into the pattern where the households the villains were raised in -- notably Shigaraki, Dabi & Toga -- mimic the society they live in, just on a smaller scale.
Except. Does that sort of narrative make sense based on what we already know about Rei?
Certainly, it is natural to want to protect yourself under physical and/or emotional duress by appeasing your abuser. This sort of complicated dynamic appears in the Shimura family, too. Just like in the house that Kotaro built, the Todoroki family revolves around the desires of the abuser and is dictated by his whims.
I would argue that Nao does give us a well-written example of this narrative. From the beginning, it’s established that she loves Tenko dearly. But in the house her husband built, there’s no room to love her son as he deserves. She prioritizes the feelings of Tenko’s father for the sake of maintaining peace in the household and this is established quickly and plainly.
Early on in the flashback, Kotaro exerts his control over the house, while Nao + her parents look uncomfortable. Despite this, we watch as they comply with his rules, all at the expense of Tenko’s feelings. When she stands up to Kotaro at last, it is not where Tenko can see and already too late. It’s a painful story, full of regret and sadness, but it is consistent from start to end. Nobody feels out-of-character or there to prop up anybody else.
So why doesn’t Rei feel as consistent in this narrative?
Because it doesn’t fit with everything we knew about Rei prior to her abuser’s subpar redemption arc.
The way she interacts with Touya would make sense, if this was how she was portrayed from the start. However, her behavior in Shouto’s flashback -- where she was first introduced -- contrasts what we get in the later Todoroki flashbacks.
Let’s compare this to the scenes in Ch 302. Here, Rei interferes on Shouto’s behalf. She advocates for her son in front of Shouto where he can hear. She stands up to his bully/villain and tries to protect him, while also validating his feelings in the process. Directly after this, Enji hits her, not for failing to comply with his demands, but for defying him.
It is difficult to reconcile this Rei with the Rei we get in Ch 302. And if you try to find an in-story reason for the inconsistency, the options either do a disservice to Rei or make things even more painful for Touya. But I’m sure most of you have realized that I’m going to suggest a reason for this inconsistency that goes beyond the canon.
Because when Rei was first introduced in the story, Endvr was unequivocally the villain in the Todoroki family, not some misguided patriarch trying to atone for his “past” mistakes. Years later and in the midst of his redemption arc, the narrative seems to be intent on making this man more palatable to readers, and it’s used Rei at every opportunity to prop up his efforts to be better. Often, though, it takes some of the heat off Enji by displacing it onto other family members, most significantly Rei & Touya.
Like, you can literally see the difference in the frame from early in the manga to now:
Ch 39: Endvr trains his five-year-old to the point where he’s throwing up due overextension and being punched by a fully grown adult who is also his father. Rei tries to protect her son and gets slapped by Endvr. All the blames rests squarely on Endvr, who is clearly the aggressor and painted as the villain here.
Ch 302: Endvr hits Rei for not preventing Touya from sneaking out to train, knocking her to the ground. Again, Endvr is clearly the aggressor, but oh this time it’s not driven solely by his selfish desires it’s also cocnern for his son; Rei is the victim but oh she also should have been watching him more closely, and oh well why was Touya going out in the first place, when everyone has told him to stop and he knows his mom will get punished for it?
Honestly, I can understand where some people have mixed feelings over Rei’s character, particularly since the writing has done her such a disservice recently. With that being said, however, it takes a minimum amount of critical thinking to recognize that while you can criticize some choices she made, you cannot hold her to the same standard of accountability as Enji, it’s absurd. The power imbalance was obviously tipped in Endvr’s favor, always.
It is a shame, too, that we can’t have more discussions that don’t turn into some readers (a lot of whom are attempting to make Endvr sound less horrible than he actually was) trying to demonize her. It’s doubly a shame the story itself doesn’t bother to flesh her out as a person, instead using her as a prop, because the complex relationships she has with Touya -- with all her children, really -- has plenty of room for exploration.
Like, there was no reason to add this new dimension of resentment due to her spouting Enji’s words back at Touya, when there was already a source of tension supported by previous canon -- the neglect the Todoroki kids suffered because Rei couldn’t be the parent they needed, due to her declining mental health and eventual breakdown.
Or, if you want to complicate their dynamic further, why not add something that focuses on Rei and has nothing to do with Enji? We learn in the flashbacks that Rei agreed to the marriage more-or-less to please her family, lamenting that she “intended to smile through it to the end,” essentially admitting that her hope was she could grin and bear it. It is telling that she had this attitude before entering her marriage; evidently, she was raised with the idea that she should be acquiescent to her parents’ whims and not express herself if she was only going to be contrary. Maybe she didn’t know how to deal with Touya’s very expressive, very emotional outbursts as a result. And her inability to respond would be the exact opposite of what Touya was seeking.
Not to mention that Touya died, and for the last decade, Rei was under the impression she had lost her son forever. He died while she was hospitalized, torn up with guilt over what she did to Shouto, only to find out that her other son died in a frankly horrific manner, and she could do nothing. By the time she would’ve found out, it was too late to even try to do anything. I can’t imagine what she must’ve felt in terms of regret alone, plus her grief. And I’m still mad we were robbed of her reaction to Touya being alive, because now suddenly there is a chance to do something, to change what was once written in stone.
Or what about Touya’s feelings for his mother, that have yet to be given much depth? As the oldest and most aware of his existence, it seems like he was the first to truly understand his mother’s situation and I can’t help but wonder: If Touya knew he vessel for his father’s ambition, and his mother was sold into role of creating/caring for him, did he question her love for him? Once he found out one parent’s love was conditional, it wouldn’t be a leap for him to consider it for the other. And yet if that’s true, Dabi doesn’t appear to hold any ill-will towards her for that. He was angry at her hypocrisy, because he knows she should understand, but her words to him didn’t reflect that.
All of that is fascinating and so much better than what we got in canon, so far at least. I’m hoping for them interact in the present at least once before the end of the series, and I think they will, but as to how satisfying a reconciliation it’ll be, I guess we’ll have to wait to see how the Todoroki plotline progresses from here on out.
#bnha#touya todoroki#rei todoroki#bnha meta#bnha analysis#this took way too long because I kept having more thoughts which made it even longer lol#and it actually gave me another idea for a touya & rei meta post but this is already a monster so that'll have to be its own separate post
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jude and cardan headcanons that make my heart warm
Cardan often waits to fall asleep after Jude does because he likes to look at her and see her relaxed, an expression on her face that he rarely sees
every now and then, at revels, a member of the court would say something that is slightly offensive about Jude, not enough for them to be punished but enough to annoy her. Cardan puts a hand on her thigh under the table and gives it a squeeze to calm her down. Surprisingly, it works.
the land loves Jude, and adapts to her very easily despite her mortality. The smells she always liked about Faerie are suddenly more noticeable in the air and sometimes when she walks, flower grow in the shape of her feet.
Cardan is extremely proud and refuses to get rid of the flowers, even if they sometimes grow in their room
at night, when neither can sleep, they go to the gardens and bloom flowers of all kinds. Jude glows with happiness that she finally masters some magic and her expression is enough to lit Cardan on fire. When they return to their room, if they even make it back, they can't keep their hands to themselves.
on lazy nights, they lie in bed, closely embraced and trace each other's scars. Cardan kisses the scar in Jude's palm and Jude pulls Cardan closer to her.
when she's really tired, or overworked(because Jude does not know how to relax) she has nightmares. She dreams of her time in the Undersea, of Nicasia's cruelty and Balekin's lips on hers and when she opens her eyes, in the darkness of the room, Cardan looks too much like him. She whispers softly 'Cardan?' and he wraps his tail around her to pull her closer, as if he could push her into his body, into his soul and keep her safe there. He replies 'I'm here, my love' and starts playing with her hair. She immediately exhales in relief. She is the Queen of Elfhame and she loves Cardan.
Whenever Jude touches Cardan's cheek, or kisses his forehead or hugs him, it's as if Cardan melts into the touch. Before Jude he rarely had the chance to experience comforting, soft touches and now he can't get enough of them. He feels all her love seep into his skin through those touches and once she notices, she finds every opportunity to touch him.
Cardan also has nightmares- sometimes they're about Balekin and the punishment he endured at his brother's hands. These fill Jude with such an anger that she wants to murder Balekin all over again. She vows to Cardan that she'll get revenge on everyone who ever hurt him and since his entire family is dead and therefore not accesible for her to torment them, she finds little ways to make Asha's life a nightmare. Other times, Cardan dreams about losing Jude to the Undersea, and when that happens he screams her name. She touches his cheek and kisses him softly and swears she'll never leave his side.
In public, they always play a game of who can annoy the other more. Their banter is a mystery to the courtiers but they always laugh and although they swear they are annoyed at each other, everyone can see the love in their eyes.
In private, they're all soft touches and I love you's whispered in the dark.
When they're bored, they sneak out of the palace and walk through the rest of the isle. They are in disguise which allows Cardan to practice what he learned from the Roach and Jude to spy and listen to what the people say when they think no one hears.
Cardan loves to visit Vivi and Oak and Orianna, even Madoc, in the mortal world. With time, Madoc learned to accept his defeat. He understands now that while he always said that family comes first, it never did for him, not truly. Now, with the possibility of war and bloodshed forever taken from him, he finally understands that he is grateful to have Orianna at his side, and to watch Oak grow. Orianna left her pretentious manners behind in Faerie and learns to treat Cardan not as the High King, but as a child that needs love and protection and comfort. She cooks his favourite foods when they go to visit, and Madoc starts treating him with respect once he realizes that Cardan can and does make a good king. They sometimes talk strategy, and when Cardan suggets something that surprises Madoc, he proudly clasps a hand on the King's shoulder and gives him half a satisfied smirk. To Cardan, it almost feels as having a father.
Vivi adores when Cardan visits and so does Heather. He's funny and charming and it's so clear that he adores Jude that Vivi can't help being proud and delirious with happiness.
Oak loves when Cardan and Jude visit because Cardan always brings gifts, and chases him around. Jude looks at them with a look that Oak rarely saw while growing up, relaxed and unguarded. Oak loves Cardan for making his sister so happy.
Taryn treats Cardan exactly as she would a brother. Her child is a big crier and it takes ages to calm them down when they start crying. Cardan can calm the baby within seconds, making funny faces and spinning the baby around in his arms. Whenever they visit, Jude and Cardan shower the child with all the love they didn't feel when they were younger.
Taryn and Jude sometimes try to pose as each other to see if they can trick Cardan. They can't. Cardan can guess which one is Jude with barely a glance at them. Jude loves him even more for it. She loves that her husband can tell the difference between them
The Ghost, The Roach and The Bomb visit often too. The Bomb makes toys for Oak and Taryn's baby, The Roach performs tricks with coins and the Ghost plays hide and seek with Oak. Oak can never seem to find him, but he soon picks up a few tricks and it becomes harder and harder for the Ghost to find the kid.
Cardan is happy because he finally has a family that loves him.
Jude's heart swells with joy when she see Cardan becoming more and more comfortable with himself and with the people around him. He once said that he didn't knew if they could take off their armours after wearing them for so long, but he seems like he found a way. His heart is less guarded, and his smiles are brighter. Her heart becomes becomes lighter too.
They never have children of their own, but they love watching the children of their people run around and play at revels. They don't allow any kind of cruelty when it comes to children and if they ever see a parent treating their child wrong, they make sure it won't happen again.
They are feared by their people, Jude with her fierceness and Cardan with his quick wit and sassy mouth. But they are also loved. People fear betraying them because they fear losing the love the King and Queen have for their subjects.
Cardan turns out to be a greater king than Eldred ever was.
Jude becomes quickly admired by their subjects, for her bravery and resilience and everything that she did and does. Young girls are fascinated by her and often come up to their Queen to tell her how they wish to be like her when they grow up.
Jude and Cardan are happy and in love for a long time.
One day, Jude remembers how Balekin asked her if she wanted to become one of them, a long, long time ago.
She asks Cardan if it's possible to turn a mortal into a Faerie and they start researching.
Turns out, it is possible.
Cardan and Jude are happy and in love not only for a long time, but forever.
#tfota#holly black#jude duarte#cardan greenbriar#jude and cardan#high king of elfhame#high queen of elfhame#the cruel prince#the wicked king#the queen of nothing#taryn duarte#madoc#orianna#oak#headcanon
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Pregnancy Announcement HCs
Drabbles under the cut for how Pedro boys would react to your pregnancy, and how you’d share the news. Trigger/content warnings: Pregnancy (both planned and surprise,) mention of abortions as an option, talk of contraception, smut (including cum play, cock warming,) mentions of PTSD and past drug addiction, mentions of dead former partners, blood, periods, doctors/obgyns, single parent/father not wanting to actively participate. If I missed anything, please let me know! Lack of editing as usual...
Pics are for inspiration, not always an exact replica. All take place in a sort of modern AU where there might be a social media to post pictures to.
Dave York
This wasn’t supposed to happen. Dave already has a family and he made it very clear that he wasn’t leaving them for you. When you found out, you were terrified he would demand you terminate the pregnancy - heck, you considered it briefly yourself. You thought long and hard about your options even before telling Dave.
His first reaction was about as bad as it could get: he said nothing, got up and left. He returned a few hours later when you had already cried yourself hoarse. He held you in his arms as he spoke clearly and carefully. He asked if you wanted to keep the baby, and when he said yes he almost seemed torn. You don’t know if it was wishful thinking that he was excited to have another child, but you swore you saw a sparkle in his eye… of course, it wasn’t that simple.
He told you it wouldn’t be easy for you since he would never be with you like that - you were just the nanny he was fucking. If you wanted to go it alone, he would help financially and support you as much as he could, but he couldn’t claim the baby as his and risk losing his daughters.
You were going to have to go the single mother route, and if anyone asked you’d have to either say it was a fling or the father wasn’t interested in being in the picture.
Din Djarin
In all honesty, you were surprised it didn’t happen sooner. Din loved to cum inside of you. He’d lay with you, his softening cock still inside you to make sure nothing slipped out. When he finally did, he’d watch with amazement as your body twitched as it adjusted to emptiness. Gently, he’d push any dripping cum back into your fluttering hole. His deep, gruff voice was laced with exhaustion and lust as he would talk about filling your pretty pussy, not wasting a drop…
When you started getting ill, you at first thought it was just a passing bug. It was inevitable with all the travel that you would fall under the weather. Two weeks into the churning stomach, you realized you missed a period.
When you brought it up to Din, he changed all travel plans - the bounties could wait, he had to get you to the nearest clinic ASAP. The test coming back positive had him glowing with pride. It was hard to convince him to wait until further along to announce the pregnancy, knowing anything could happen in these early stages. As soon as you gave him the all-clear, he did everything but shout it from the rooftops. By the time the picture was posted -your headgear, his helmet, and a tiny helmet between - everyone already knew anyway.
Ezra
It was a surprise, but not a shock. You and Ezra, although you tried to be safe, definitely had a habit of being caught up in the moment and forgetting certain precautions. A walk through the forest that led to a beautiful field of flowers, a picnic on a moonlit beach - there were times Ezra was so overwhelmed by your beauty and the beauty around him that he just got swept up. It was hard not to get swept up with him.
He was ecstatic when you told him you thought you might be pregnant. He could hardly wait for you to take a test. His knee bounced anxiously as you waited the 2 minutes, holding your hand tightly in his. The positive result brought tears to his eyes as he embraced you close but gently, already scared of hurting the baby. He saw it as nothing less than a blessing. He dropped to his knees as soon as he let you go, already talking to the bundle of cells, calling them his little shining star. The nickname sticks throughout the pregnancy, leading to a beautiful space-themed nursery and all events leading up to the birth, including the announcement.
Frankie Morales
You’re absolutely terrified to tell Frankie. You knew he wanted to be a father, but the two of you had talked so much about the fears you shared about being parents. Mental health, substance abuse, financial stability - it made the concept of “starting a family” overwhelming.
Your stomach rolled the whole time you waited for him to get home from work, little plastic test taunting you from the table. What if it set him off? He’d been sober for years, but you knew every day was a new battle. You were so consumed by your own thoughts, playing out how he might react in your head, that you didn’t even hear him come in.
“Are you…” He half-asked the question, eyes darting between you and the test. You couldn’t find your voice, only nod. The facial change in him was immediate: broad smile and wonder in his eyes as he laughed, scooping you into his arms. You clung to him just as tightly as he started laughing, too much joy coursing through him. As he started crying “holy shit, I’m going to be a papa,” how could you have possibly doubted he’d be anything but ecstatic?
You each tell your closest friends and your families, but you manage to keep it under wraps for the first months until posting your announcement and shocking everyone. Toes in the sand at the beach of your favorite camping spot, imagining the sandcastles and other games you’d be playing in the near future - it was everything you could ever want.
Jack Daniels
The two of you were religiously careful. You had talked about a family, but had agreed that until Jack was ready - which may or may not happen - you were going to prevent it. But life finds a way…
You find out much later than you would have liked - nearly 3 months in, you missed the whole first trimester. Looking back, there were obvious signs of pregnancy but you just didn’t think it was possible. You and Jack find out together at a doctor’s appointment. You leave the office shell shocked with a stack of pamphlets to consider your options and an appointment for next week. When you get home, Jack doesn’t even talk about it. You try to bring it up a few hours later, but he ignores you.
Finally, 3 days later, you can’t take it anymore. You feel like you’re in this completely alone at this point as you yell at him “ignoring it won’t make it go away!” Jack breaks down and tells you he’s so damn scared. He cries in a way you’ve never seen him cry, talking about how he wants a family with you but he can’t go through that kind of loss a second time. It nearly killed him the first time and he wouldn’t be able to handle it again. You talk long into the night about all of it - both of your fears, worries, dreams, thoughts - nothing is off limits as you talk about all the possibilities lying in front of you. Even through the fear and trauma, one thing is clear: you both want this.
It’s not easy, but your doctor helps relieve some worries. She speaks frankly to you about the development of the baby along the way and suggests a therapist that might be able to help, as well as classes you can take on parenting. It doesn’t take long for the worried “what ifs” to be paired with excited “whens.”
Javier Peña
When Javier Peña walked into your small town police station, you thought you were dreaming. Sent to help with a case that your rural forces didn’t have the experience to handle, he was only supposed to be in town as long as the case took. You never imagined you, just a lowly admin, would catch his eye.
It didn’t take long for you to tumble into the bed of his hotel room. And your bed at home. And your car. And his truck. And just about any possible surface in between. What you thought was a one night stand turned to three, then four, and soon into a full fledged fling. You knew the expiry date hanging above your heads, so you kept your feelings for the charming (if a little gruff around the edges) agent locked deep away. The case took about two months, and then he was gone just as suddenly as he arrived.
A month after his departure, when you found out you were pregnant, you didn’t know what to do. He hadn’t even left you his number, so you were sure he had no plans to see you ever again. Should you track him down and let him know, or just carry on with this on your own? You spent night after night talking to the growing baby, asking what you should do.
Javier ended up answering the question for you, when he unexpectedly walked into the station once more. He asked to speak with you privately before admitting he had missed you. He told you about trying to forget you, only to spend most of his evenings telling his father about you. Eventually you cut him off with a kiss, telling him you’re glad he came back. You take his hand, placing it on your stomach when you tell him you had been thinking about him too.
Javi helps you secure a transfer to Laredo and even though you technically have your own place, you’re spending practically every night with him anyway. If anyone wondered why the move, well the recognizable mustache on your announcement answered their questions.
Marcus Moreno
Marcus doesn’t believe you the first time you tell him “I think I’m pregnant.” He remembers his wife’s pregnancy with Missy, and you haven’t shown any of those signs. You roll your eyes and tell him that every woman and every pregnancy is different, but he still doesn't believe you. It isn’t until he’s staring down at three tests, all positive, that it clicks in his head he’s having a second child.
He’s excited, but he admits he’s scared. He’s older now, what if he can’t keep up with a baby? More than that, he’s worried about Missy.
You both know you don’t want Missy to feel left out or replaced by a new sibling. The two of you have a good relationship, but of course there were speed bumps to get there. She understood you weren’t trying to replace her mother. Would she be as understanding, knowing that you weren’t trying to replace her?
You and Marcus sit her down and tell her together. Before you can even start on your planned spiel about how the family is growing and no one is getting replaced, she is talking a mile a minute about having a little sister. You and Marcus share a relieved breath and lock eyes before you have to remind her that it might be a little brother. This seems to dampen her mood a little bit, but overall she’s still excited… even if she is adamant she isn’t touching any stinky diapers.
Another way you make sure to include her, is how you announce it to your friends and family. You’re sure, with Marcus’ status, it will get out to the public eventually, but you start by sending close friends and family a picture of Missy wearing a shirt calling her a “Big Sister.” She loves the photoshoot, making all kinds of faces as you snap away on your phone. Happy, sad, pouting, crazy… they all go in the baby book.
Marcus Pike
It was only a few months after your wedding that you and Marcus were ready to start a family. You didn’t “start trying” as much as you “stopped preventing.” There were a few false starts when your period would be late or the time you caught the stomach flu, but a few weeks short of your first wedding anniversary, you were pregnant.
Marcus spent many nights laying next to you in bed, hand on your stomach as he just stared at you - to the point where you actually started to get annoyed by it. He was amazed at your body changing, at the growing child inside of you, that he was finally getting the “happy ever after” he’d been looking for all his life.
The announcement was hilarious to shoot. Marcus and you were covered in paint splotches, laughing with love shining in your eyes. You held a palette Marcus knelt in front of you with a paintbrush, painting “Masterpiece coming soon” on your stomach where the bump had just started showing with the right angle.
Max Phillips
Max knew before you did, even if he didn’t put it all together. He started complaining that you tasted different, smelled different. Not just your blood, but as he spent hours trapped between your thighs. His keen senses had him identifying a change, but neither of you knew what change it was. After all, as far as you knew, a vampire couldn’t get a human pregnant.
Max whined when your period was late - he loved your time of the month. “Best of both worlds” he would say as he feasted on you for as long as you could stand it. It had happened before, your period being late due to stress or illness, but this time it wasn’t just a day or two. A few weeks later nothing had happened. A quick trip to your gynecologist confirmed it.
“I thought you said there was no way you could be pregnant,” she teased as she showed you the results.
Max was shocked, scared, and then proud as a pig in shit. He was terrified to be a father, but he hid that behind a swagger and a “yeah, I knocked her up. Not even death can stop these swimmers.”
Even if you did try to hide it for much longer, the vampires he worked with could smell the change in you too. Put together with Max’s protectiveness over you being ramped up even more than it had been… it was easy to figure out.
You took the picture as a joke - it was supposed to be a compromise that if you took this photo, he’d take the cheesy ones you wanted - but damn if it wasn’t your favorite of the bunch.
Maxwell Lord
You know that Maxwell had a bad history with family. First his parents weren’t as supportive as they could have been, and then his ex-wife had all but used Alistair against him anytime she could. You knew he may be nervous when you shared the news, but you didn’t expect him to turn into Maxwell Lord, television personality instead of your Max.
The first question out of his mouth was “is it mine?” Which broke your heart and set a fire in your gut. You threw anything you could get your hands on at him screaming at him for accusing you of cheating on him. You had just started to calm down when he mentioned lawyers and set you off again. You knew his past, but you truly thought he loved you and that you were his future.
You left, booking yourself in at a hotel. You didn’t leave the room - not only had you not packed anything and knew the paparazzi would devour a picture of you looking so disheveled, but you just couldn’t find it in you to go anywhere. You stayed in the room, ordering room service, watching TV, and crying. In a fit of rage, you had thrown the bottles from the mini bar across the room, needing to channel your anger and knowing you couldn’t drink your sorrows away anyway.
He showed up a few days later, having followed the credit card charges to the hotel, looking remorseful. He apologized for the way he reacted, and you heard him out despite still being upset. There was a long talk in which you reminded him that you’re not his ex or his mother. You’re not trying to screw him over or get anything from him by having his child. It takes him a long time and a lot of groveling for you to truly forgive him, but you go back home that night.
A few months later, as the two of you take a picture on his yacht, both of your hands holding your growing bump, you can hardly tell the fight had happened at all.
Oberyn Martell and Ellaria Sand
Ellaria noticed before you did. A mother herself, she picked up on the glow in your skin, the change in your body, and the complaining about aches in your back or your breasts. When she pulled you aside and suggested you were pregnant, all you could do was blink. The three of you didn’t use protection with each other, only when others were invited into your bed. You’d never gone out of your way to prevent pregnancy, so while it shouldn’t have been shocking, it still caught you off guard. Ellaria brought you to her doctor, sitting with you while you found out for sure.
You were nothing but excited to share your news with Oberyn. You knew how he felt about you, about love and passion, about the children he already had. You had no doubt that he would love your child just as much as the rest of his daughters. The night you told him was spent making love while he waxed poetic about you, your body, your child... If you hadn’t already been pregnant, you’re sure you would have been at the end of the night.
With sand snakes spread across Dorne, you struggled for a way to tell them all. Sending letters didn’t seem to do the moment justice. This may be Oberyn’s 9th child, but it was your first and you wanted an extravagant way to share the news.
Ellaria helped you to plan gathering all the children together. It wasn’t easy, but a month and a half after finding out, you had the whole, huge family together. You posed them all for a picture with you, Oberyn and Ellaria front and centre. You were handed a sign to hold for the picture - supposedly showing the family crest. However as soon as the picture was taken, you turned to show them.
Tagging: @wickedfrsgrl @din-damn-djarin @seasonschange-butpeopledont @kesskirata @phoenixhalliwell @dihra-vesa @vonschweetz @insideafictionaluniverse @driedgreentomatoes @computeringturtle @spideysimpossiblegirl @thottiewinemom @mrschiltoncat @anaaaispunk
#Dave York#Din Djarin#The Mandalorian#Ezra {Prospect)#Jack Daniels#Agent Jack Daniels#Agent Whiskey#Frankie Morales#Frankie Catfish Morales#Javier Pena#Marcus Moreno#Marcus Pike#Max Phillips#Maxwell Lord#Oberyn Martell#Oberyn Martell and Ellaria Sand#pedro pascal character fanfiction#drabbles#WookieTales#Pregnancy HC
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Rayaari headcanon - in canon for rivals to friends (...to something more?)
(inspired by this lovely anon)
Namaari doesn't really have any friends. She has acquaintances for sure, and soldiers who will follow her into battle without question. She has political advisors who can speak to her for hours regarding trade policies, and the average Fang citizen, who will bow deeply whenever she passes. She has the little Fang children, who chant 'Princess Namaari!' when she visits, and palace staff, whom she knows all by name. But a friend..?
She never had a truly close friend as a child, which makes it all the more difficult when she meets Raya and thinks 'what if?', despite knowing what she is about to do. After her betrayal, after breaking Raya's heart, Namaari knows that dream of friendship will never happen, but in the moment, it is truly sincere.
For at least the first five years following the return of the Druun, Namaari catches sight of Raya regularly during her scouting missions. They often share barbed and vicious words, although there is a familiarity to their exchanges that makes Raya ironically feel more like an old friend than any of the acquaintances surrounding her back home.
When she doesn't see Raya for more than a year, she fears the worst - that Raya has been turned to stone. It's strange how attached she's gotten to their run-ins, but there are bigger problems facing Fang, so Namaari attempts to accept this fact. It festers in the back of her mind, however.
She can't help but feel relieved when she discovers the Dragon Scroll has been stolen from her room...Somehow, she instantly knows this is the work of Raya.
After the Druun, after the return of the dragons, after...everything, Namaari looks across at Raya, and sees a person who has been in her life for so long, and yet she knows so little about. Her feelings for Raya are complicated - guilt and remorse for what she has done, a fondness and familiarity for this girl who has been her supposed rival for so long, and a tiny corner of her heart that always asks 'what if?'
She watches Raya reunite with her father, and can't help but accept the fact that she did this, she separated Raya from her family and from her land. She's surprised that Raya still seems to want to speak to her, let alone welcome her to this reunion. But representatives from all the lands are there, and this first day of freedom from the fear and despair of the last six years brings with it a sense of renewed hope.
'The bright celebration of the day has calmed as dusk fell, and now people are conversing in different groups. Raya is sat on a low wall overlooking the courtyard, and Namaari can see her legs swinging aimlessly. She sits beside her for a while, gathering up the courage, and then says 'I'm sorry.'
Raya turns to look at her, but says nothing, her eyes shadowed from the lights shining out from behind them. 'I'm sorry for the pain I've caused you in life, for all of it,' Namaari continues. 'I'm sorry you trusted me and I let you down. I'm just...sorry.' She offers no excuses, but wishes her words would be more eloquent instead.
She allows the silence to settle over them, allows Raya to think. And then, as she stares into the darkening skies above, she feels fingers brush against her arm. 'I can't say for certain if I can forgive it all,' Raya admits. 'But I accept. And maybe...maybe we can start afresh?'
The subtle offer of friendship is handed to Namaari, but some days she struggles to take it up, unsure if it is really her place to do so. She's the reason behind many of the terrible things that have happened in Raya's life, and it's easy to think that Raya deserves to be free of it all - free of the memories, of having to see Namaari, of having to speak to her.
But she sees Raya more and more often as the lands begin to work together and help each other rebuild, and Raya sends a private smile her way whenever they run into each other.
And so, she tries...she listens attentively when Raya shares a story, or complains about something that happened to her that day. She picks up small ways to help Raya be in a better mood when she is feeling melancholy (talking a lot, to distract) or overwhelmed (sitting with her, in silence), or even angry (taking her to the sparring grounds). She brings small treats with her to Heart after she's been on missions to the other lands, which invariably make Raya light up in excitement to taste them.
There is still a certain level of awkwardness or hesitancy between the two of them for the few months. Namaari is slow to share anything herself, picking through her words carefully in case she says the wrong thing and offends. Raya often babbles away for a while, before having moments where she stops and looks mortified - clearly forgetting there is another person there to listen to her stream of consciousness.
Raya's popularity has also changed. She shifts from being a lonely figure in the word (and the guilt inside Namaari burns whenever she remembers her role in why that is), to someone who is the savior of Kumandra, the bringer of dragons. People whisper about her exploits, and are eager to get to know the Princess of Heart. Namaari sees how special Sisu, Tong, Boun, Noi and their families have become to Raya, like an extended family that can join her and Chief Benja.
In her darker thoughts, Namaari reflects on how she will never be able to join that aspect of Raya's life, feeling as if she's caused too much damage and hurt to deserve such a role.
Nine months after the return of Kumandra, they are walking side-by-side through fields near the palace in Heart, when a group of small children run up and start demanding attention from Raya. 'Is this her?' one demands loudly, and they all turn their small faces to stare at Namaari. 'Is this the Princess?'
'This is Princess Namaari of Fang,' Raya confirms. 'The warrior who helped save Kumandra, and also my best friend.' She entertains the children for a while longer, and then they both watch as the group runs off for the next adventure. 'Best friend?' Namaari finally manages to ask, trying to make her voice sound teasing, but it comes out slightly croaky instead. Raya bumps her shoulder against Namaari's arm. 'Sure you are.'
Three months later, the lands have gathered together for the first annual celebration of Kumandra's rebirth. Heart is hosting again, this time in order to show off the progress made since that first day, when the aftermath of what had happened six years prior needed to be cleared away.
Namaari finds herself sitting back on the same wall, next to Raya as they watch fireworks explode in the sky above. The rest of the crowd is entranced by the pretty lights, but Namaari is tuned into the woman sat beside her as she leans closer. 'I was wrong,' Raya half-whispers in her ear as more fireworks explode overheard. Namaari turns to stare at her, quirking an eyebrow in response. 'I could forgive you,' Raya explains. 'I forgave you a long time ago.'
And then Raya's hand are on her face, and they are kissing sweetly
#raya and the last dragon#rayaari#ratld#raya#namaari#raya and namaari#raya x namaari#raymaari#Some issues to work through always with these two#but they also understand each other#friiiends to rivals to friends to lovers#always the complicated path#but we love that#alllll the headcanons
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Whenever, Wherever (jhs)
Summary- Hoseok is a time traveller but that’s not the strangest thing that has happened to him. The strangest thing is when he meets a girl he’s never seen and she tells him he’s her best friend.
word count- 6.7k
pairing- timetraveler!Hoseok x Reader
rating- R
genre- angst, fluff, smut
warnings- car accident, mention of parental death, mention of miscarriage, major character death, description of gun shot wound (but not gory), explicit smut (unprotected lovey dovey sex), hoseok pukes a lot (soz babe ily)
a.n- Ahhh I finally finished my Secret Santa fic for @thebtswritersclub! I’m so excited to reveal that I’m indeed @baepsaetan‘s secret santa 🎅🏼Day did you guess I was your ss? Did you like me subtly asking you questions about this during our sprints? hehehe! Happy new year, love! 💕
For people who can guess, this was inspired by the Doctor, River relationship and is loosely based on the Time Traveller’s Wife (eventhough I straight up have never seen the movie and literally only read the wiki page 🥴)
A huge thank you to Bella @hobisbeautifulass for beta reading for me! I’m sorry I made you cry at work!
As always feedback appreciated, a reblog and a like goes a far way. Send me an ask! 💌
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The day his mother passed away was when Hoseok discovered his gift.
Stranded by himself in a large suburban park in the middle of the night, there was an eeriness surrounding the dark expanse of road. There were no cars, no streetlights, and no solace to be found on the edge of the wooded trail he stood before. His heart was still racing, adrenaline coursing through his veins as he remembered seeing the blinding lights of the trailer in front of him just moments ago, his mother’s voice ricocheting through his head. He didn’t understand how he got here, and how the loud honks and screeches of tires had fallen to give way to this deafening silence.In the distance, he hears footsteps. The crackle of crushed leaves echoing in the air as he sees a man with dark hair, dressed in a large black sweater and a pair of blue ripped jeans, step forward. In the eight years he had lived thus far he had never been as terrified. The man lifted his arm as if to reach out towards him, and Hoseok closed his eyes tight, wishing he could run away.
Before he knew what happened, he was lying in his bed under his warm, colorful duvet. He rubbed his eyes, his heart still pounding and feeling an overwhelming urge to vomit. He thought it was a dream till his father entered with a tear-streaked face to let him know about his mother’s fatal accident.
That was the first time he time traveled, but it wouldn’t be the last. He didn’t know why he could do it. He didn’t know how he could control it. All he knew was that he was drawn to certain places, certain times. It was never when he wanted, like the first time when he wished he could go back to a few hours and not be greedy for ice cream so his mother would not have to drive him. Or the time he wished he could go back to tell his grandmother he loved her. Or the time in university where he wished he had never got caught cheating and lost his scholarship.
For being a time-traveler Hoseok’s life was full of regrets but the one thing he would never regret was meeting her.
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For most people time is linear. There is the past, the present, and the future. But for Hoseok, time is a tangled mess, a convoluted web of events that he can only watch unfold. Never having the power to control where he ends up, Hoseok felt helpless, like his life was a punchline for the universe. All through his life, he would wind up at weird places at weird times. He would never know how long he would be there before being zapped back to whenever he came from.
Hoseok was twenty-five, he was single, he was a music producer, but most of all, he was tired. Lately, his time jumps were too frequent, going from happening once a year or so to once every few weeks. He would find himself in odd places at odd times, sometimes it was a quaint suburban street at dawn, other times a posh private school at midnight. All to stay there for seconds before zapping in his bed, as usual, his entire day lost, nausea bitting at his throat.
“Hoseok? Oh my god! It’s really you!” The new barista at his favorite coffee shop squealed when he made it to the front of the line, jarring him from his thoughts as he aimlessly scrolled through his Instagram, trying to decipher if he missed out on anything important. He looked at her, dressed cutely in a yellow sundress with the establishment's blue and gold apron on her waist. Her hair was loose around her face, her smile brilliant, as she looked at him with excitement. She was beautiful and it took Hoseok a few moments to stop himself from his shameless ogling.
“I’m sorry, do we know each other?” he asked, confused. He would have remembered if he ever saw her. She looked pretty unforgettable. Maybe she was one of Yoongi's friends, although something tells him Yoongi would find her sunshine persona offputting.
“Yeah! You’re my best friend!” She pointed at him, as his mouth dropped. Okay, so she was crazy. Great...
“Uh…” Hoseok didn't really know how to answer that, so he decided to follow his gut and just ignore her comment. “I’m sorry. Can I just order?”
“Vanilla latte, no whip, half sugar coming right up!” She beamed as she wrote on the cup, leaving him dumbfounded.
“How did you…?”
“Told you! You’re my best friend!” She pranced away to make his drink, as he stood there confused. When she returned, she handed him a drink and Hoseok could do nothing more than smile half-heartedly as he walked away. Did he have a stalker?
He decided not to visit that coffee shop again. Better not give this crazy person any more ideas.
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Hoseok stood in someone's home, someone's living room, dark other than the moonlight that filtered through the windows. It was a modest room, resembling one of those he would see on television. In the center of the room, there was a bright yellow rug flanked on three sides by a couch set facing a television hooked to the wall above a fireplace. It seemed cozy, somewhere he would have liked to live.
He had no idea where he was and he cursed his gift once again. This was getting ridiculous. This was the first time he had appeared inside someone's home. He shook his head as he looked at the clock placed on one of the small tables next to the big couch.
3 am. Great. He was trespassing in the middle of the night.
He decided to escape before the owners caught wind of him. As he made his way towards the door, a family portrait caught his eye. It hung right next to the front door, framed by a beautiful gold frame.
His mouth dropped. It was him. He looked a little older, the lines next to his eyes a little deeper as he sat smiling on a grassy field, his arms around a beautiful woman in a yellow sundress holding a small infant wrapped in green blankets.
He felt his heartbeat pick up. He knew her. It was the random barista girl. The one who insisted she knew him. What the fuck?
Before Hoseok could spiral any further he heard a noise behind him. Turning he saw her, dressed in flannel pajamas, walking down the stairs. She looked around her mid-thirties, nothing like the chipper twenty-something he'd seen last week.
He stood there blinking at her as she came closer, awe on her features that quickly morphed into sorrow. She touched his face gently as if in disbelief that he was there as her eyes glistened in the moonlight.
"Hobi?" She spoke, her voice was hoarse as a tear slipped down her cheek. Hoseok didn't know why but he felt his heart lurch at her tears. He had no idea who she was but he felt this innate pull towards her. He wanted to hold her, wipe her tears, and most fucked up of all, he wanted to kiss her.
"I- who are you?" He asked softly, his hand coming to hold hers as if he couldn't help himself, leaning slightly into her touch.
"We haven't met yet?" Her voice was wet with tears as she sniffled, moving closer to him. She hugged him, wrapping her arms around him tightly as if to feel if he was really there. He stood silently as she squeezed him close, and wrapped his arms around her when she started sobbing into his chest. He held her tight as she cried, his eyes brimming with sympathetic tears.
"I missed you so much Hoseok," she said as she looked up at him. He had never seen a more beautiful woman in his life. Before he could think, he was leaning down to capture her lips with his own, his heart in his throat. She tasted like strawberries and mint, and he felt his head turn into a haze. Before he could deepen the kiss, he felt the familiar feeling in the pit of his stomach. He pulled apart as he saw her fade slowly, trying his hardest to hold on to her as she did the same.
All too soon, the familiar sight of his bedroom materialized as he stood there alone, her last words ringing in his head.
"No! Please! It's too soon!"
He didn't know when he started crying, but soon he was kneeling on his floor sobbing for a girl he didn't even know the name of.
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Hoseok didn't know when he fell asleep, but he woke up on the floor of his bedroom, his face puffy and back sore. Without a second thought, he rose from his position, grabbed his keys, and bolted out of his apartment. He had to find her.
It took him six days to meet her again. Six days of anxiety, amped up from the coffees he chugged as he visited the coffee shop at different hours. He couldn't even describe her properly, every time he went to the cashier to tell them how she looked they gave him an odd look. Maybe it was because by the third day he looked like a deranged stalker, describing her height and her build to anyone who worked there. He was surprised they hadn't banned him yet.
On the sixth day, she waltzed in and sat across from him, not a care in the world. Her smile was wide, a juxtaposition to the sad, older version of her he was fixated on. She wore a polka-dotted dress which hitched up a little as she crossed her legs. Hoseok was speechless as he almost choked on his coffee.
"You told me to meet you earlier but honestly, I just wanted to annoy you a little." She giggled, her hand coming up to cover her mouth, her eyes lit with mirth, and the stress of finding her hit him like a ton of bricks. Hoseok jumped out of his seat, his arms around her shaking as he tried to control his breathing. His mind was fuzzy, he had no reason to react this way, but he couldn't help himself. He didn't know her but he missed her. His heart was beating a mile a minute as he held her tighter.
"What took you so long?" He asked his voice a little hoarse from not speaking all day, his breath coming out in puffs against her neck. She hummed a little apology as her hand reached his hair, stroking his scalp in a way that made him instantly relax. He melted into her, her sweet floral scent a balm to his anxious nerves.
"Do you even know my name yet?" She spoke, her voice light and airy, as he finally let go of her. He cleared his throat in embarrassment, the tips of his ears turning as red as the beanie atop his head. He settled back in his chair awkwardly staring at her, fiddling with the string of his sweatpants that laid on his thigh. He looked up at her smiling face, as she put her hand on top of his. "It's Y/N. It's nice to finally meet you, Hoseok."
Her words were simple but their effect was anything but. Hoseok felt like everything in his world made sense, that all those times he had puked after a shitty trip down the stitch of time was worth it. Her hand was so soft, skin so perfectly smooth as her thumb stroked his hand, that Hoseok had a hard time finding words to express how he was feeling.
He looked at her shyly, not knowing where his nerves were coming from, as he smiled, meeting her warm eyes.
"It's nice to finally meet you too, Y/N."
----------
Hoseok sighed in annoyance as he walked down the path of the familiar suburban neighborhood. The sun shone brightly, and all he wanted to do was to be zapped out of here so he could end up in bed next to his girlfriend. It had been barely thirty seconds since he saw her, her soft skin molded against his as she slept next to him, her hair tickling his nose as he spooned her. He missed her already. This wasn't fair. Why did he have to walk around this stupid cul-de-sac when he could be wrapped in her warmth?
Ever since the coffee shop, things with her had progressed extremely fast. He couldn't help himself. He never felt as close to someone as instantly before. Granted, he knew they were going to get married and have a beautiful child together, but that didn't mean he knew how fast he was going to fall for her.
The day he first learned her name, he couldn't wipe the giddy smile off his face. She was different than any other woman he had met. She was outgoing and optimistic, and brave. Much braver than him. While he stuttered to ask her for her number, she leaned across the table grabbed his phone, unlocking it as if by magic, and added her phone number in. While he wrote and rewrote eighteen different texts, pacing in his living room, she beat him to it with a casual "Stop overthinking, dummy. It's only me!"
How could he stop overthinking? It was her. His dream girl gift-wrapped and sent to him by fate. He never thought his gift would be good for anything, but she was here and all his previous suffering finally made sense.
As he walked along the sidewalk, biding his time, he approached a bus stop. It was cute, and definitely not from his decade. A janky blue bus stopped, and out she walked, making Hoseok miss his step and almost trip. She was dressed in a school uniform, a crisp white shirt with a plaid skirt, a cute flower-shaped backpack on her shoulders, and her hands full of college pamphlets. Hoseok couldn't help the smile that overtook his features. He wanted to run up to her but he realized even if she was his girlfriend now, it was still a crime to approach a minor. His gift was so stupid.
He stood there, averting his stare and looking at his shoes instead, as she walked closer to him. He promised himself not to be a creep and try to talk to her but her voice makes him break his resolve.
"Ew. Can you not get a hint? Get away from me, you creep!" she yelled and Hoseok's head snapped up. He felt his face flare with rage as he watched a kid around her age try to put his arm around her as she tried to shove him off. The kid was relentless, throwing cheesy pickup lines her way as she continuously rejected him. He wanted to beat that little shit to a pulp.
Clearing his throat, he approached the two. "Dude, she said no. Get off her," he spoke through gritted teeth.
"What's it to you, old man?" The boy rolled his eyes, his hand still wrapped around her as she pleaded at Hoseok with her eyes. Hoseok wasn't old! He wasn't even thirty yet! He hated this kid.
"It's not nice to forego consent, kid," he sneered, schooling his face into the coldest expression he could muster. It seemed to have worked because one look at Hoseok's face and the future sex offender had his hand to himself before he walked off with a huff. Hoseok glared at him as he disappeared in the opposite direction. Good riddance.
"Thank you so much!" Her voice was higher than it was now, a little spring to it that only comes from innocence as she looked at him with round eyes. "You're like my own personal superhero!"
Hoseok felt awkward. He never wanted to talk to her here. Running his hands through his hair, he smiled at her, throwing an awkward "Any time!" as he rushed away. The feeling in his gut was back and he had never been happier to want to throw up. The afternoon sun faded as he stood in his own room, blinded and running to where he knew his trash can was.
As he vomited into the plastic can, he felt a hand rub soothingly down his back. She handed him a water bottle when he sat up next to the bin, his head aching.
"Welcome back, babe. When did you go this time?" She giggled at her own joke. God, Hoseok loved that laugh.
----------
Hoseok was nervous. He hadn't been this nervous in a really long time. Surrounded by all his friends dressed in custom tuxedos, he fidgeted with his bowtie, and scrutinizing his reflection in the mirror he fixed the lapels of the blood-red jacket he was wearing. Who convinced him this gaudy suit was perfect for the occasion? Oh yeah, his bride.
Jung Hoseok thought he'd accomplish a lot of things by the time he was thirty-one. He thought he would have signed to a major label as an in-house producer (he did), he thought he would be living in a beautifully decorated apartment downtown (he does), he thought he would have a cute little dog to welcome him home (Mickey is adorable, in case you were wondering), but he never thought he would be waiting at the end of the aisle for someone who would want to share their life with him.
Ever since she came into his life, Hoseok felt like it was filled with sunshine. She brightened every aspect of it. The first time he kissed her, really kissed her, it felt like happiness was resonating through his entire skeleton - like she was the one thing missing in his world. The first time he told her he loved her he almost threw up from the nerves knotting in his stomach.
He promised himself he wouldn't cry, but he couldn't help himself as she walked in. She had foregone the usual white gown, quoting something about the patriarchy, as she walked towards him in a dress, equally as red as his suit.
Her smile was wide and he was in awe of her beauty. He sniffled through his vows and she winked at him through hers, a simple gesture that made him chuckle and relaxed the emotions brewing in him. She could always do that with the simplest of things, be it a touch or a look. He kissed her with passion as their friends and family cheered. He hoped she didn't mind how much he was blubbering. He promised himself he wouldn't cry.
Their wedding was one of the best moments of his entire life. Dancing to cheesy music, cheek to cheek, the couple in red stood out amongst others in black. Hoseok was so in love that he didn't even mind when at the end of the night he felt the familiar buzz in his ears. He was slightly upset that he abandoned his new wife on his wedding night, but is it abandonment when the hotel lobby fades into what he knows now is his future home?
He saw her there, sitting on the couch, a frown on her face as she seemingly stared into space, dressed in a set of comfy pajamas and he couldn't control himself. Whispering her name so as not to startle her, he moved towards her when she smiled up at him. Sitting next to her on the couch, he pulled her to him with a grin. She giggled as she settles herself on his lap, running her hands over his jacket, before soothingly scratching his scalp. Hoseok couldn't help but lean into her touch, a goofy grin on his face. He was sickeningly in love.
"If it isn't my handsome new husband. I've been waiting for my wedding night for years." She joked as she pulled his face to hers, kissing him deeply. Hoseok's heart lurched in his chest as a little whine escaped him. She isn't surprised in the least to see him there, and why would she be? In the past five years, Hoseok has visited so many different versions of her. In a way, it's part of how he fell in love with her. She may only be thirty-one to him, but he'd seen her at every stage of her life.
As she deepened their kiss, his hands went around her waist squeezing her tight as she ground on him gently. He remembers the different versions of her as he feels his blood rush through his body, each touch sparking electricity under his skin. He remembered when he first laid eyes on her in that small cafe, his nerves on their first date, her tears when he proposed, the first time he had her under him after she invited him for a movie. But he also remembered her at six playing in the sandbox in the park, sixteen and humming to pop songs while she walked home, thirty-six as she cried in his arms, seventy when she looked frayed and weak but still beautiful. He had seen all of her life, moments that he was lucky enough to be brought to more often as he fell more in love with her. He had visited her hundreds of times, and he couldn't wait to do that for the rest of his life.
He kissed down her neck, leaving little bites that he soothed with his tongue as she undressed him, his jacket somewhere on the floor, his shirt mostly buttoned. She moaned as he cupped her breasts, a beautifully airy noise that set his heart on fire.
Soon the two were breathless and naked as he hovered above her on the couch. She arched into him as he entered her, her little whines encouraging him. He latched his lips on her hard nipples, nipping them how he knows she loves. She fit him so perfectly, always so perfect for him. His wife, his soulmate, his Y/N.
"I love you, wife," he whispered and placed his forehead on hers, his hips thrusting into her heat, as he relished the connection between them. He kissed her deep, almost overwhelmed by how perfectly their lips slotted together. He could kiss her forever.
"I love you, husband," she whispered into his mouth, and his pace increased, a hand coming down to rub at her clit. She writhed under him as he pushes her off the edge. Her legs shaking around him, her heels poking into his back, as he savored the way her walls pulled him in. He was panting when he came, filling her up and babbling a chant of her name.
He pecked her face about a thousand times as they both laid on the couch boneless and giggling. When he, inevitably, ends up back on his bedroom floor, he saw her smirking at his naked body on the floor, dressed in his t-shirt, her hair still wet from her shower. She squatted next to him.
"And where is your suit?" she chided, her lips lifting, even when she tries to pretend she's mad.
"We'll get it back in a few years." Hoseok shrugged as he pulled her into a kiss, missing her body next to him already.
----------
The bar Hoseok sat at is loud, too loud for the conversation Yoongi keeps trying to have with him, and that's precisely why he chose it. Next to their table is a bachelorette party, a gaggle of women dressed in feather boas and plastic tiaras, sloshing drinks on themselves as they excitedly laugh. It's an odd contrast to the way he's feeling, the atmosphere on his own table somber.
"So what? You're going to leave your wife at home and get wasted here? Is that what you do now, Hobi?" Yoongi scolded his friend but Hoseok was already too far gone, having had a few bottles of beers before even inviting Yoongi out. He knew he was an asshole, he didn't need Yoongi to remind him, but he needed to escape.
His once happy marriage was becoming tumultuous, and, no it wasn't because they didn't love each other anymore, but quite the opposite. The past two years had really shown him that even if they were fighting and yelling, they still loved each other. Even when they were mad they crawled into bed together at the end of the day and held each other, not being able to sleep otherwise.
Their marriage started off great. There were cuddles in the kitchen, dance parties in the living room, vacations in Rome, and a night where they both sat next to each other on the floor by the bathroom holding hands as they waited with a little blue stick. They made love on that floor when it showed two lines, but that wasn't a surprise - Hoseok had seen his child in that photo the first time he kissed her.
The surprise was when she woke him up in the middle of the night, thirteen weeks into the pregnancy clutching her stomach, tears running down her face. He had never felt as scared as he did at that moment, breaking all the traffic laws he could get away with to get her to the emergency room. He held her hand through the ultrasound, through the exam where she winced, and through the doctor solemnly telling them they had had a miscarriage. He didn't let himself cry in front of her, always wanting to be brave, but he sobbed when she slept, knowing that he had a child but gaining little solace from the fact as he mourned.
The second time the two lines showed up, they were careful. He waited on her hand and foot, working from home, ensuring she got the proper nutrients. The result was another trip to the emergency room and another night of tears holding each other. By the fourth time, they stopped being surprised, just two zombies driving calmly to the hospital, before returning home. She went to the bedroom, while Hoseok drank himself into a stupor, before asking Yoongi to meet him here.
Hoseok knew he had a child, but he felt hopeless, drowning in the undercurrent of hurt and apathy. He loved his wife, loved her more than anything in the world but he couldn't bear to look at her tonight, couldn't bear to convince her once again that he had seen their child. Maybe they adopted he thought bitterly as he switched from beer to shots.
He walked home in a drunken haze despite Yoongi's worried insistence that he take a cab. Somewhere during his walk, he had started crying, tears painting his face and sending shivers down his body as they cooled in the evening chill. He wished he could fix it for her, she was always so brave, always so supportive of his stupid ideas and moods. Every time they had a fight, she was the first to apologize, a smile on her face as she cracked a joke and tickled him till all his worries were forgotten.
Drowning in self-pity, he barely noticed the buzz in his ears as he entered his house. Stumbling into the living room he saw her sitting on the couch with a cup of tea. He stared at her as he realized he was in the future, her hair greying, and her skin wrinkled. He didn't know how to react, but the tears returned as he rushed to her falling on his knees as he held onto her legs.
"I'm so sorry, baby. I'm so sorry." He apologized again and again. He didn't care that this version of her wasn't the one that needed to hear him, but he felt like a terrible husband, a terrible partner, as he kissed her knees. She stroked his hair and shushed him with a soft smile.
"What happened, Hobi?" she asked, her voice gentle, and he felt all his walls come down as he told her things he was sure already knew. He felt exhausted, every cell in his body aching. He laid on the couch, head in her lap as she listened to him, consoling him with the wisdom of a life lived.
After he had fallen silent, sober, and unable to convey any more emotions, she spoke.
"Hobi. You have to be nicer to yourself. You were the perfect husband. The perfect soulmate." Her words were meant to be soothing, but as soon as he heard them he felt like ice was running through his veins. He sat up immediately, looking at her with wide eyes.
"Were?"
"I shouldn't have said anything..." She looked guilty, hurt crossing across her features, as she ran her hands up and down his arms.
"No! Y/N... I die?" His voice was small, almost timid towards the end of the sentence, as he held her hands to ground himself.
"I'm sorry, baby." Her eyes glistened as she cupped one of his cheeks, looking at him sadly.
"When?"
"I'm not telling you. You'll go insane." She was firm in her resolution, her tone taking cadence that she always used with him when declaring the end of a conversation. But Hoseok couldn't help himself. He was going to die, he was going to leave her. He felt like his heart was going to beat out of his chest.
"I'm already going insane! You have to tell me. What if I can stop it? We can be together. I don't want to leave you!" He pleaded, his eyes wide in panic.
"Hobi... You've never left me. You visit so often." She spoke with a small smile, seemingly reminiscing.
"Please! Please or else I'll go every day knowing it's my last with you. I - I can't do that. Please." He was almost whining at his point and he didn't care how desperate he sounded. He just wanted to know how much time he had with her. He was so stupid, how could he leave to get drunk while she waited for him at home. He didn't deserve the way this version of her was looking at him with such love.
"I barely even remember when it happened." He knew she was lying, could see it from the way her gaze averted his. Hesitantly she continued. "I'll... I'll just tell you. It's the day after you see yourself for the first time."
"See myself?" He repeated, his brain running through his memories. He would have remembered if he saw himself. It would be hard to forget, but he came up empty, tears of frustration lining his eyes as he ran his hand through his hair.
"That's all you told me. That you saw yourself and you felt bad for not being able to give yourself advice."
"I won't ever leave you. I promise. I'll come back. As much as I can." He kissed her at that, repeatedly, her lips soft under his. She knew he couldn't control his ability, but she smiled at him anyway, agreeing with his promise, telling him she'll see him soon, even if she had no idea if that was true.
When he was transported back to his room, he couldn't help himself from heaving on the floor, the contents of his stomach painting the hardwood. As always, she rushed to him, wiping his tears and walking him to the bathroom. She helped him change, before cleaning up after him, despite his protests, as she glared at him every time he tried to sit up from the bed.
When she returned from putting the cleaning supplies away, she shut the door to their bedroom, and there, on the hook behind it, hung his wedding suit, the crimson a bright splash of color amongst the white. She followed his eyes, giggling a little.
"You already made up for being an ass, don't worry," she joked, fingers poking at his side to tickle him gently.
Hoseok had missed her laugh. Missed it so much. He cut her off before she could say anything else, whispering apologies against her lips. He was never going to leave her.
---------
He was in a park, the trees throwing looming shadows under the moonlight as he walked around. He recognized this park, it was the one near her childhood home. She had taken him there during their first Christmas together, and he still remembered the silly grin on her face as she showed him the sandbox where she used to spend all her days as a kid, making sandcastles. He smiled at the memory. It was the first time in a while that his time travels hadn't taken him straight to her and he missed not being able to see which part of her life he was visiting.
He walked about reminiscing about his day. It was his daughter's third birthday and he felt a little bad leaving his wife to clean up the mess. He couldn't believe Soojin was three already. He pulled out his phone, scrolling through photographs as he waltzed down memory lane. He smiled softly at the photo from the day she was born. She was so tiny then, her little, pink heart-shaped lips in a pout as she stretched, her eyes almost disappearing beneath her chubby cheeks.
He kept his eyes glued to his phone, looking at photo after photo. There was one of her covered in mushed peas and he remembered how long it took him to get the mess out of the living room rug. There was one of her dressed as spiderman who she had declared her favorite recently after watching the cartoon on Netflix, doing the signature web-shooting pose. There was one of holding on to her mom as she walked for the first time. Hoseok's heart felt full, and he couldn't wait to get back home.
He decided to keep up with the tradition of seeing his wife every time he skipped through time and started walking towards her house, deciding to take the shortcut she had shown him. Humming a little, he placed his hands in his pockets as he strolled along, thinking about the delicious cake he had custom ordered for the party. He could probably eat the whole thing. Would it taste as good after it's been in the fridge?
His musings came to a quick stop however as he looked into the distance, just at the exit of the wooded path. There, dressed in a yellow sweatshirt with a giant dog on the front and jeans that didn't quite reach the ankles, was an eight-year-old boy. He walked closer and his heart stopped as he saw himself for the first time. He was crying, sniffling in the air, and as Hoseok approached his younger self, he vanished into the air.
He felt the air leave his lungs as he stumbled in his steps, falling on to the ground.
"That's all you told me. That you saw yourself and you felt bad for not being able to give yourself advice."
No. It's too soon. He couldn't collect his thoughts as they rushed through his head barely leaving a trace. When he had that conversation four years ago he thought he had more time. Soojin was just three years old. He thought he would have years, that he would see graduations and intimidate boyfriends, and walk her down the aisle. It's too soon.
He could feel himself hyperventilating, his breaths short and his ears echoing with his heartbeat, as he tried to collect himself. He looked at his hands shaking in his lap and his eyes focused on his outfit. How could he have forgotten what the man in his memory was wearing? He put on these ripped jeans this morning, the same jeans that haunted him for the first sixteen years of his life. How could he have not realized that he was the creepy old man he had nightmares about as a kid?
Trying to control his breathing, he started to formulate a plan. He didn't want Y/N to know, he didn't want her to go through the emotions he was going through right now, because she would go through so much worse when he was gone. He sat in the park and let himself cry, hoping that he wouldn't have to leave soon because leaving meant saying goodbye and he was not ready yet. It's too soon.
---------
Hoseok awoke with a sinking feeling in his heart and a lump in his throat. It was the day he had been dreading since before he learned her name. He hated that he didn't have enough time. Enough time to hold her, enough time to watch his daughter grow up, enough time to build a bigger family.
He found the other side of the bed empty and standing up with a groan, he moved to the room next door. He stroked his daughter's cheek a tear spilling out his eye that he quickly wiped. Bending down, he kissed her little cheek, sniffing her calming scent.
"Daddy loves you, baby. Daddy will always love you. Please be good for your mommy okay?"
She only moved a little at his words, sighing before continuing to snooze. Hoseok ran his hands over his face, his heartbeat accelerating. He looked at the mirror in the corner and practiced his smile a few times. He had to be brave. He had to be brave for her, for both of them.
He walked into the kitchen, schooling his expression into one of bliss, as he saw her standing in her underwear and one of his t-shirts, and his heart felt hollow. He loved her so much. He hated that he had to leave this way, but that was his fate from the beginning, wasn't it? Their whole relationship, everything, started from and led to this moment. Padding over to her, he put his arms around her squeezing her tight, his chest molding perfectly to her back as it always did.
She giggled as she leaned into him, softly caressing his arms and making him nuzzle further into her neck. He took in her delicate scent and tried to control his breathing. He could not break.
"Someone's cuddly this morning," she commented, turning around with a grin.
"I just love you, that's all."
She cooed as he brought his lips to hers. What he intended to be a gently good morning kiss, turned into so much more as he lost control of his emotions. He kissed her like he would forget her taste, but it wasn't him who would be dwelling on this moment for years to come.
When the two broke apart, he cupped her cheek as he felt the familiar buzz in his ears.
"You know I love you more than anything in the world right?" He whispered before he started to see his kitchen fade away.
Her voice echoed as he was teleported into a dark room, momentarily blinded.
"Aww, I love you too, my Hobi!"
He fumbled around a little and then he heard it - a loud gunshot, shattering his eardrums. The sound hurt more than the sudden sharp pain in his chest, he thought, as he gasped for air, stumbling to the ground. The lights in the room turned on then and he saw the younger version of his father in law, demanding something, his voice inaudible.
She never told him details about this moment, but kind of fitting that it was in the hands of her father. He never did like Hoseok much anyway. His breaths felt shallow as he chuckled at the irony. Or was it justice? Karma? He didn't know. Nevermind, his chest hurt far more than his eardrums. Fuck, being shot is a bitch.
He felt the nauseous pull for the last time as he dropped into his bedroom. The last thing he saw was his wife rushing over to him. Oh, she was so beautiful, he was so lucky she chose him.
For being a time-traveler Hoseok’s life was full of regrets but the one thing he would never regret was meeting her, even if that was the reason he lost her.
—
I hope you liked this super sad angst piece, for more fics of mine check out my masterlist
#thebtswritersclub#houseofddaeng#jhope angst#hoseok angst#hoseok fanfic#hoseok smut#hoseok fluff#jhope fluff#jhope imagines#jhope smut#jhope x reader#bts fic#bts fanfiction#btsnoonanet#purplearmynet#hoseok x reader
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So I’ve recently been thinking about the rejected prophecy au and how popular it was when they first came up with it. And I was scrolling through @rinas-ninjas blog and saw a piece for the au. I started thinking about how the tournament of elements would go in this au and how Lloyd would interact with the other EMs. I also remember something similar in a fic I read about it back when the au was popular. Unfortunately I can’t seem to find it anymore but it sparked the inspiration for this one. I thought it would be interesting to see something from Skylor’s POV as well, and thus this was born.
It’s my first time posting fanfiction so hopefully it’s not too bad?
Worth it for This
////
Skylor wasn’t blind.
She saw the green ninja. The way he unconsciously shrunk into himself when the other ninja were around. The way he tensed when one of them put a hand on his shoulders in front of the other masters.
She knew the green ninja was abused by his so called ‘family’, and she couldn’t do anything about it. It hurt, Seeing him put up with the taunting and pushing from the other ninja. But what could she do? She was just another competitor in this tournament. One who was mildly infatuated with the fire ninja.
Or, she was supposed to be. Until he showed his true colors.
Red seemed to suit him, as anger was all he ever showed when around the green ninja. That, and jealousy, which Skylor couldn’t understand. So what if the other was the prophesied savior of Ninjago? He was a ninja and the master of fire.
But she knew what power could do to people. All it took was a taste, and suddenly you do whatever it takes to come out on top. She’d seen it in her father, still sees it, she sees it in all of the competitors in the tournament, and she’s seen it in herself.
But that lust for power was something she never expected to see in the saviors of Ninjago.
It almost made her want to ditch the plan altogether.
Almost.
——-
It was day two of the tournament and the plan was going well, all things considered.
Faking nervousness was easier than she thought it would be. Especially when compared to pretending to like the fire ninja.
Kai, as she found out from listening in on their conversation, was quite cocky. He truly believed he was impressing her. She would have found it cute, if not for the fact that his idea of impressing her was talking down on the master of energy. If she had to listen to him talk about how useless the element of energy was one more time, she was going to blow her cover.
“Hey, why don’t you sit with us. There’s plenty of room at our table.” He says gesturing towards a seat in the crowded booth. Pointedly ignoring the distraught look on the green ninja’s face.
“But Kai, we have to stick to-“
“Shut it Floyd.” At the master of Lightning’s interruption, he immediately quiets.
Fortunately, Garmadon takes that moment to usher him to another-thankfully unoccupied table.
“Come Lloyd, I would like to talk to you. Privately.” He says looking pointedly at the other three ninja.
So Lloyd was his name then. Huh..She might have to remember that.
...
Apparently the ninja were the ones caught infiltrating her fathers ceremony after the master of metal’s defeat. She wasn’t surprised. Neither was she surprised that her father put the earth ninja and lightning ninja against each other in the next round.
Good, serves them right for treating their teammate like trash.
It was entertaining at first, watching them duke it out in the arena. They seemed to already have an intense hatred for each other. Unfortunately they sided together and the black ninja, Cole, she kept having to remind herself, sacrificed himself at the end. All the while she had to pretend to feel sorry for them.
The ninja don’t seem to know everyone is out to get them. Although most of the elemental masters seem to have caught on to Lloyd’s situation. Which means that their plight with the ninja is more to do with their mistreatment of their teammate, and less about their hostility towards the other contestants. Still, Skylor can’t help but feel bad about what’s going to happen. Hopefully she can convince her father to let the green ninja and his father go after all of this is over.
As of right now though, she was trying to very discreetly help the kid out by using the master of form’s power and knock down her own teammates. She may not like the ninja, but she wasn’t going to let the kid lose and be taken to the factory because his teammates couldn’t give a crap. They were only on his team because of Garmadon, which they made abundantly clear when Kai hit his back, causing him to fall behind.
She may as well try to give the kid a break.
Skylor skated over to where Kai had once again fallen due to lack of experience and general skill. “Your teammate looks like he’s struggling out there.” She helps him up, watching as he looks to where the green ninja is skating. “He could use a little help.”
Of course he did have some help. A few contestants sided with him, if only to lighten the load that the other ninja made worse. But most of them decided to side with Chamille, mostly just to teach the other two a lesson.
Kai sneered. “He’s fine” he then starts skating toward the goal at a leisurely pace, as if he’s taking a walk in the park. “He’s the green ninja, he doesn’t need our help. If he wants to stay in the tournament he’s got to put in the effort.”
Skylor just skates away. If he wants his teammate to lose, fine. He’ll get what’s coming to him in the end.
...
Tricking Kai into following her through the jungle was remarkably easy. She would laugh, if she wasn’t trying desperately to act like she still liked him.
They were currently walking through the tunnels. Kai was trying to convince her to join them and defeat her father. In truth, she has been considering it. If only because her father was a power hungry lunatic and she didn’t want to have to hurt Lloyd. She felt sorry for him, her father was undoubtedly having him brought in chains to where the ceremony was to take place. He didn’t deserve it. That’s why she would help Kai with his plan to take down her father. If only so Lloyd could live his life in peace with his dad.
...
Kai has officially gone off the deep end. As he is currently standing before them with her father’s staff in hand, about to attack Lloyd.
“YOU HAD ALL THE POWER!” Kai says, advancing on them “NOW IT’S MY TURN!” Skylor wonders if that’s the staff talking or Kai himself. She wouldn’t be surprised if it was the latter.
Lloyd has a look of absolute fear in his eyes as he tries to shield her from his teammate’s wrath.
“I SHOULD’VE BEEN THE GREEN NINJA!” Now that is something she knows is really coming from Kai, and she has to do something before Lloyd is struck down by his own powers.
She pushes Lloyd behind her, knowing she has no protection against her father’s staff that holds more power than he’s ever encountered.
Lloyd looks at Kai from behind her “No Kai! Don’t!” Just as Kai is about to fire it. a massive drill comes through the wall, taking out half the room.
Kai’s sister quickly destroys the staff, freeing all the elemental powers inside it.
Overall, Skylor is glad she’s not a ninja. And glad she can finally drop the act of trying to be nice to them.
.....
It’s over.
Her father is in the Cursed Realm, sent there by Garmadon in order to save Ninjago. Skylor wishes there was another way to win. Lloyd has been through too much pain for someone so young. She remembers how young she was when her mother passed. Her father only growing more obsessed with power and trying to gain his own. In a way, she can relate. He may not have loved her, but he was still her father. And a part of her would always miss him.
When Kai comes to talk to her, she doesn’t spare him a glance as she walks passed him towards where Lloyd and Nya are standing near their flying ship.
“Hey you two” They turn to face her, each having a look of mild recognition on their faces as she approaches. “Me and the elemental masters were about to head back to the restaurant to debrief, care to join?”
Lloyd looks skeptical, as if she’s going to decline her offer or reveal it as just a joke, but Nya smiles at her “We’d love to. We could all use a little rest after today” She says, looking over at Lloyd, who looks shocked at her answer.
“Perfect, they’ll be glad that you accepted” Skylor says, turning to where the others are looking at them.
And the look on the black ninja’s face when she rejects his request to join made this battle just a little more worth it.
And when they’re all seated at three large tables put together at her restaurant, and Lloyd looks over at her with a small but genuine smile and mutters a “thanks”, she can’t help but be grateful to her father for bringing them all together.
Of course, next time she happens to see the ninja, she’ll be sure to tell them they’re all banned from her restaurant.
Except for Lloyd and Nya. They’re welcome to noodles on the house anytime.
#ninjago#skylor chen#lloyd garmadon#kai smith#jay walker#nya smith#ninjago garmadon#ninjago au#rejected prophecy au#amari writes
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Behind the Garrison, by the Canal - Finn Shelby
Word count: 1630
Warning: mention about sex and semi-nudity (?)
A/N: i wrote it in spanish and translated it, apologies if you see any mistake!
gif: @el-cheung
A soft knock on the door interrupted (Y/N) from his reading. She looked up curiously from her book, not knowing who it might be.
Her mother? She was upstairs sleeping with the baby.
Her father? He was working.
Her older brother? He was meeting his fiancé’s parents.
Finn? No, he was at a family meeting, it couldn't be him. Plus, they never met each other during the day.
Y/N got up from the uncomfortable purple sofa, going to the door. She tried to peek through the small window to find out who it was. Suit, a peaked hat, a cigar. A Blinder.
Sh took a deep breath, had her brother gotten into trouble? Having exhaled, she opened the door, showing Finn.
"Finn?" she asked curious and somewhat nervous, they were only supposed to see each other half past eight, behind the Garrison, by the canal.
If her father came earlier from work, she was dead.
"Hey, Y/N." he smiled, as he spoke fast.
"I know we said to meet in a few hours, but since I have the afternoon free, I thought about asking you if...you could...lend me another book?" the nervous smile was still there.
The young girl was teaching the younger Shelby how to read, and since he learned, he read every book there was and to be.
Pride and Prejudice? Finished in 72 hours.
Little women? One week.
Hell, he'd even read the bible and could recite some verses from memory.
On one occasion, Finn told Y/N that he had corrected Isaiah, about the bible:
"I will fear no evil!" Isaiah said humorously, as he answered Arthur about whether he was afraid on one of those many illegal occasions. “Jesus said it, you know, Arthur? And I…” Finn cut him off, correcting him.
"Isaiah, that’s Psalm 23:4." Finn said casually, as he finished his cigarette.
Arthur, John, and Isaiah burst into laughter, of course after trying to figure out how Finnny Boy knew so much about God.
"Sure, Finn. Give me a moment." Y/N closed the door, took the Illustrated edition of Alice in Wonderland that he was reading, took out the bookmark, and returned to the door. She opened it and Finn was still wearing that nervous smile.
"Here it is, have fun with Alice, the Queen and the Mad Hatter, Finn." Y/N's smile made Finn's hand shake.
A few weeks ago, the boy had killed a man. His hand did not tremble, his head did not hesitate. But, oh shit, his heart exploded in anger that night, at home. Finn would never admit it, but it scared him to grow up and be as savagely violent as Arthur, or as distant as Tommy. Fear and anxiety were eating him alive, until he realized that his hand was shaking when she smiled at him.
“Thank you, beautiful." He smiled, as he exchanged the borrowed copy of Romeo and Juliet for that copy of Alice. After a wink and a "see you later" he walked away.
With a stomach full of butterflies, Y/N closed the door.
"Hello friend," she whispered to the book. "Have they treated you well?"
Y/N sat down on the couch again, going over the sentences she had marked with her black pen for the umpteenth time. As she was fanning through the pages, a piece of paper fell on her legs. Curious, she took it in her hands and saw Finn's handwriting. She knew it was his, she had taught him to write in italics. Also, she would recognize that misaligned handwriting and that soft stroke anywhere.
“I thought I knew love until your beauty seduced my eyes. Page 118 –Finn”
She smiled.
After greeting her father who had just arrived from work, Y/N commented that she would go to sleep and skip supper. The clock in her room read half past seven in the afternoon, which gave the signal to Y/N to escape through her window.
She wrapped herself up, looked at herself in the small mirror on her wall, and went out the window. Although the house had two stories, Y/N's room was downstairs, making it easier for her to get out the window.
Legs out, then the torso, the arms, and finally the head. Once outside, she adjusted her hair and began her short walk.
Y/N lived just five minutes from the Garrison and should meet Finn in an hour. But she wanted to stop by the Garrison to say hi to Harry. Also, she was to bring him a shirt that her mother had fixed for him.
As she thought of Finn, the five minutes turned into two seconds, and Y/N found herself in front of the pub. It was Friday, so it was full of men with inhuman amounts of alcohol in their blood. She took a deep breath and opened both doors, the smoke from so much cigarette making her dizzy.
She walked over to the bar and saw Harry serving a scotch. Her nose narrowed, remembering that awful taste she'd tasted with Finn.
"It's horrible," Finn had said, "I don't know why my brothers drink this shit."
"Hello Y/N" Harry greeted, anyone could hear her mother's Irish accent on him.
"Hi Harry, I bring you your shirt. Mom thanks you for making her focus on something other than the baby."
They both laughed, as Y/N handed him the bag. After a casual chat, some questions about her father, her new brother and her mother, they said goodbye. Y/N passed by the private booth, but didn't hear a soul. Maybe Finn was already by the river.
It was a matter of seconds before she reached the river, in their usual spot. She sat on a rock and waited.
Two, five, ten, fifteen, thirty minutes.
It was ten past eight, maybe quarter past eight.
Finn wasn't coming, and Y/N was starting to get scared. It was late, she shouldn't be alone. It was eight thirty, she had waited fifteen more minutes.
"God, don't let anything bad happen, please” Y/N said between prayers.
When she got up, she started walking in the direction of his house. To Finn's house. She was sure he was reading. She headed to Finn's house mainly because she was only a few feet away from it and also because she wanted to know if he was okay.
When she arrived and saw the light on, she was relieved. She knocked on the door, she would ask him to accompany her home.
"I’m going!" Finn yelled, there was a laugh and a slim, semi-naked woman who was wearing a man's shirt opened the door, still laughing.
"Lydia I told you that..." Finn's laughter stopped "Oh bloody hell."
Finn had come up behind Lydia, shirtless and his suspenders dangling at his sides.
The floor shook under Y/N's feet. The rest was blurry, for both of them. Finn remembered the cold hitting his shirtless chest as he yelled Y/N's name all over Watery Lane and Saint Mary's Street, asking for forgiveness and for her to listen to him. Y/N remembered the knot in her belly, hearing nothing except her breaths and feeling how Finn's words he had written burned her heart. Her heart, for the first time, was breaking along with the trust she had in him. Because she thought he was good, she believed that he loved her and that he wouldn't be fooling around with others after all those kisses and secret talks on the river.
When she got to the door of her house, Y/N was trying to open it. But the key was on the other side.
"Can you hear me for a damn moment!?" Finn yelled, coming to her side. He took the sad girl by the arm and turned her around.
"Do not touch me! Don't ever touch me again in your fucking life, Finn Shelby!" she bellowed, tears spilling from her eyes.
"Okay." he quickly separated from her, releasing her “But you have to listen to me. I…She…” his voice trembled.
"Did you sleep with her, Finn?" Y/N whispered.
"No...I..." the boy nervously combed his hair as he looked at the floor, Y/N knew instantly that he was lying.
"You had sex with her?!" Y/N let out in a strangled cry, asking but claiming at the same time. Her angry eyes were focused on Finn's, who were scared "And don't lie to me, please don't lie to me."
"Yes."
Y/N’s throat went dry, while her heart kept on breaking.
"Since when?"
"Five months now."
"Oh..." Y/N let out bitterly, then laugh "You are so afraid of looking like your brothers that you forget a detail: You are them, you always were and always will be."
“Don't tell me that, Y/N. You can't tell me that…” Finn cried.
"Yes, I fuckin’ can. You could shag her, I can tell you the truth. I'm not lying to you, Finn. I never lied to you."
“Do you remember two weeks ago, on the river? You said…” Y/N interrupted him.
“I said how I felt, Finn. Now I feel so much, so much pain and hate that I wish I had never told you."
Finn's face was a complete puzzle.
The door slammed open, appearing Y/N's older brother.
"Bye, Finn."
She entered the house, and headed straight for her room, ignoring her brother's whispers about how she should never have gotten together with Shelby. That they do this, they do that.
“Y/N! I am talking to you!" Peter said, entering his little sister's room.
"Peter, stop it, ok?" exploded Y/N “I know I didn't have to hang out with the Shelby family. But you're also dating a stupid woman and nobody tells you anything! "
Peter backed away, shocked.
“No… Peter, sorry. Wendy is…"
“Save it, Y/N. I opened the door for you, so that Dad wouldn’t kill the Shelby himself. But first thing tomorrow morning, they want you down. Both of them."
And just like that, Peter left the room, leaving Y/N in a mess and crying.
#finn shelby#finn shelby imagine#arthur shelby imagine#arthur shelby#peaky fucking blinders#peaky blinder fanfic#peaky blinders#thomas shelby#tommy shelby#tommy shelby imagine#joe cole#john shelby#john shelby imagine#polly gray#michael gray#alfie solomons#the peaky blinders#birmingham#luca changretta
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hii ! I love your writing and this is going to be my first request on this site so i'm a bit nervous. May I request your angst prompt #6 with either akaashi or bokuto (or anyone you want but I just love them gah) and something accident related if possible (but if not it's fine!), i'm an angst sucker ;-; thank you and have a nice day!
MEMORY - BOKUTO X READER
hi !! dw it’s completely ok to be nervous about your first request, i was literally shaking when i first sent mine ! and thank youuu it’s always nice to know that my work is appreciated 💕 i had no idea of which boy to choose but i never wrote angst for bokuto so here it is, i hope it’s what you had in mind ! <3
-> angst prompt #6 “stop saying my name like it’s the last time” (that one HURTS omfg)
-> bokuto x gn!reader | Angst with a capital A | word count : 2K
warnings : car accident, mentions of blood, hospital environment
bokuto always thought it was funny how a smell, a sound or a sight could hold enough power to trigger memories that he thought had been erased by time.
but no smell, sound or sight was ever needed for him to remember the day he first met you. how the purple lights of the bar were slowly dancing on your skin, casting shadows that made your features look different every time he casted guilty glances at you. he remembered the feeling of his sweaty palms when he asked for your number, and how you had to blink exactly four times to read his messy handwriting on your arm.
all these seemingly insignificant details were kept safe in the depths of his mind, patiently waiting to resurface every time his heart needed them. but if these kind of memories were kept so vivid by choice, others - much darker - had a terrifying way of imprinting into one’s brain…
it was a bright april afternoon, the kind of day that made people forget about their worries, and bokuto had just finished what he considered to be one of his best practice. as usual, his heart swelled with excitement at the thought that he would tell you all about it as soon as he’d step foot in your house, where he was just heading.
but the sudden vibration of his phone in his pocket made him stop dead in his tracks.
he was not particularly stressed by phone calls, but something about the way his heart dropped made his hands start shaking and his surroundings blurry ; something was off. he hesitated a few seconds before getting the phone out - maybe it was cowardice, but his body already knew that he was not ready to handle what was coming at him.
the voice he heard on the other side of the line was undoubtedly yours. the vibrations, the tone, the pitch, he had heard it whispering sweet nothings in his ear way to many times to be mistaken. so why did it take him so long to admit that it was well and truly you, calling him for what looked an awful lot like a goodbye ?
although pain and fear had grabbed you by the tongue, you miraculously managed to tell him about the poor driver that had been distracted by his kid - too distracted to see you crossing the road on your way to the store, and too slow to hit the brakes.
your voice was weak, so weak that bokuto did not even hear the last thing you said before passing out on the warm asphalt. and so he started running, as fast as humanly possible - if not more - because he knew he was only two streets away from you, and he knew that he would never forgive himself if he arrived too late.
bokuto had many preconceptions about the way he would ever react to an accident. panic, anger, sadness, incomprehension… but nothing could have prepared him for what it truly was. in one second, his mind had time to produce hundreds and hundreds of questions, and they all remained unsolved until his eyes finally laid on you, or more like what seemed like a nightmarish version of you.
a woman was frantically screaming, a hand over her mouth like it was of any use. behind her, a young girl was staring at the blood stain on the white car’s bumper, eyes wide in terror. and in the car, a giggling toddler was happily chewing on his teething ring, having no idea that today had changed his father’s life forever. the latter seemed stuck in a cataleptic trance, and it seemed like the first aider was not going to get anything out of him.
bokuto was ready to beg on his knees for the ambulance driver to allow him on the ride to the hospital. he had a thousand ways to prove that you were the love of his life : the picture of you in his wallet, your matching key rings attached to your respective bags, the crumpled receipt of the necklace he had bought you a month ago, the one that was now hanging loosely around your dreadfully immobile neck. but just a glance at his despaired eyes was enough to understand that he deserved his place by your side in what would probably be the worst moment of your life - and his.
three paramedics were too busy putting you on a stretcher for bokuto to even catch a glimpse of your face. and the fact that he was left alone with his imagination made him want to throw up. yet when his eyes finally laid on your bruised and bloody features, it felt much, much worse than anything his imagination could have thought about. his heart skipped more than one beat at the thought that maybe he had arrived too late.
but no, your eyes fluttered open while the medics were still yelling orders at each other, meaningless words that were only background noise for bokuto. his hands gripped the edge of the stretcher, even though they were longing for the touch of your skin, no matter how scratched and wounded it was.
« hey, hey, stay with me, alright ? » he articulated in a hoarse voice as your hand found its way to his cheek. seeing that, one of the medics started reaching for your arm - you had too many broken bones for him to allow you to move so carelessly. but one of his colleagues, a tall woman with the kindest eyes, stopped him before his fingers could wrap around your wrist. and the look she gave him was screaming for his indulgence. ‘let them’.
although the opaque windows were filtering most of the ambulance lights, faint beams of red and blue were still dancing on your face. it was true that bokuto did not need anything to trigger his memories of the first time he saw you, but the alternation of the two colors on your features were a bitter reminder of the purple neons that had lightened your face in that bar, where everything had begun. and so were his sweaty palms, warm and shaky against your wrist which he had grabbed as carefully as if it had been made of porcelain. but the blinks of your eyes looked nothing like when you tried to guess the numbers he had written on your arm. they were desperate movements of your lids that were painfully trying to stay open - because if you had one last wish, it was that bokuto’s face would be your last sight.
your facial muscles only allowed a few painless movements, and luckily for the both of you, a faint smile was one of them. « h-how was practice ? » you asked, the left corner of your lips curling upwards. he let out a sorrowful laugh, ignoring the tears that were prickling his eyes as he started to kiss your palm at an alarming pace, like he was so desperately trying to get something out of the feeling of your skin against his lips.
« you’re gonna be okay, i promise… i love you » he told you, eyes intensely locked with yours like it was the first time these words were leaving his mouth. « i love you. so much. i love y- i love you. so fucking much, i really love you » he repeated like a prayer, words mixing up in his mind that was too focused on your eyes to think clearly about anything else.
« kou… listen to me » you whispered, still trying your best to keep your smile when it felt like every fiber of your body was being torn apart. your thumb caressed his cheek, but so stiffly that you knew it probably did not even feel like your touch. « thank you for everything, for being you and for loving me. i love you too, and you deserve to be happy… »
no. this didn’t feel right. this wasn’t a promise of love, it had the bitter taste of goodbyes, of words that are said just to alleviate the pain of the living. « don’t say it like that, please » bokuto pleaded, hating himself for ordering you when you were in such obvious distress. but for the first time since that god-sent night at the bar, he hated the sound of every word that had left your mouth. he would have given anything to go back to just a few seconds ago, when you were still joking about his practice. because back then it didn’t feel like you were going to leave.
« you’re gonna be ok. i love you, kou », you said in an almost maternal tone. « stop saying my name like it’s the last time ! » he exclaimed with such vigor that even the medics stopped for a second. but you didn’t flinch, your eyes were still kind and peaceful. and they still were when your thumb progressively started moving, and when your lids slowly closed.
──
the hall of the hospital was cold - in every sense of the word. akaashi was nervously playing with the lid of his coffee, sat upright on a chair even though his legs felt restless. bokuto, on the other hand, had refused to eat, drink or even sit for one second until he had talked to one of your doctors. it had now been almost two hours - and every second felt like torture.
but oddly enough, akaashi was the first to react at the sight of your surgeon that was coming towards them at a frustratingly slow pace.
« how did it go ? » he asked, the joint of his hands white from holding his coffee cup so tight.
« they made it. our nurses brought them to a private room where they will be watched v- »
bokuto didn’t need to hear more. he had no idea of which room you were in, but it didn’t matter - the hospital was not that big, he’d find a way. he always found a way.
running like a madman, he couldn’t even hear akaashi yelling at him to come back. his heart was throbbing with happiness at the thought that you were patiently waiting for him in a room. safe and sound.
he had spent so much time hammering the most terrible scenarios in his head that he had almost started to believe some of them were true. in a sense, he had already felt how it would be like to live without you - and he was now promising himself to never feel that pain ever again.
tired of running around without knowing where he was headed, bokuto eventually asked a nurse to indicate him the room you were kept in. and, although it did not respect the hospital’s privacy policy, she gave him without thinking twice ; because just like every other member of the staff, she knew about the boy that had spent hours crying and waiting for his loved one. her eyes were blurry with tears when he thanked her about three time before heading to the said room.
and there you were. laying on your back, staring at the ceiling with your fingers fiddling with the sheets - just like you always did when you waited for him on his bed.
« oh thank god » bokuto breathed out, taking a few seconds to admire your features before running to your side. his hands were still wet from his tears and his eyes were red and puffy, but he had never felt so happy to hold you. his lips immediately found their way to your hands, completely ignoring the strong smell of betadine, and they stretched in a grin at the familiar feeling of your fingers that seemed so tiny against his.
when he finally looked up at you, he felt like the luckiest man alive. just the sight of you breathing was something he had started to give up on. your chest was slowly heaving and your eyes blinked exactly four times before an embarrassed chuckle left your lips :
« excuse me but… who are you ? »
@toworuu @catwithangerissues
#haikyuu#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu angst#bokuto koutarou#bokuto x reader#bokuto angst#haikyuu x gn!reader#hqxreader
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Rue: Chapter 7 (Jasper Hale x OC Imagine)
He felt her long before she heard her.
The same old tugging in his heart, followed by this sense of knowing that she was nearby, coming right for him.
And in anticipation of her arrival, he staked his guard just outside the clearing of the house. He was soon joined by members of his family, Edward on his left and Alice on his right. Carlisle and Esme were not too far behind, on the veranda. No one dared move.
Then there was the rustling of the leaves, but in all reality they had heard her from miles away, deliberately making the largest of noises. Adeline emerged in all her glory, single handedly holding the carcass of a giant mountain lion which she clearly had drained already. With a flourish, she threw the carcass right at the foot of Jasper.
She always did have a flare for the dramatics.
“You wanted me right, Jasper Whitlock?” Adeline growled, her eyes were wild and her countenance hostile. Alice eyed her warily, unable to predict the other’s move and Edward flared his nostrils in warning, ready to lunge forward anytime.
Jasper held out his hand, gesturing for the two to step down. With his eyes still trained on Adeline, he took a step forward to come face to face with the girl.
"Adeline."
Adeline’s face broke into a wide feral grin, though her eyes were shinning like cold hard coals. “Well here I am.” Her hands flew rapidly in the air, gesturing to herself. “So quit your stalkerish behaviour and let’s talk like real grown adults who’ve been living for way too long.”
He kept his face impassive, trying to show her just how hysterical she was acting. “You’re being irrational now. No one here means you any harm.”
“Irrational? Me irrational?!” She echoed in disbelief. Before pointing a finger in his face, absolutely livid. “I don’t need this talk from you! I’m not the one who’s been following an innocent girl half the country, disrupting her peace! Driving her insane!”
“Really, all I wanted was just some answers, which last I checked were quite long overdue.” Jasper shrugged nonchalantly, while Adeline looked as if she were ready to explode the next second.
“You don’t come to my house and harass me and my siblings and then demand to be answered to just like that!” She spat.
“Then what should’ve I done then?” Jasper asked cooly, his frustration was slowly building as well.
“You might have asked nicely-”
“Asked nicely?” He couldn’t help the scorn in his laugh, but neither could he conceal the hurt he had been feeling. “Would you have cared to answer then? Instead of running away as if you’ve seen a ghost? When you were the one who’d ran away like the ghost yourself?”
That seemed to slap her in the face and Adeline spluttered for a moment before finally threw her arms in the air, in a tantrum.
“I don’t care what you want! Just leave me the fuck alone!”
“You know I can’t do that." Not now when I’ve finally found you after so long.
In the end it was this declaration that proved to be the last straw for Adeline. With a feral growl and lightning reflexes, she was lunging for his jugular. But she had not known that Jasper was just as prepared for the attack; he had years of experience in war and in the handling of newborns. With equally, if not even quicker speed he blocked the attack and launched a counter attack, thought not meant to be lethal, only to subdue his opponent. Adeline dodged it with poise and precision, and retaliated with another punch aiming for the solar plexus.
It became apparent in a matter of seconds that the girl was fighting to win, aiming for all the vulnerable spots of her opponent, she fought with grace and an instinct, as if she knew where and when the next blow would be. Jasper on the other hand was quicker and stronger, craftier. Despite the girl’s anticipation, she was no match to Jasper superior skills, and it soon dawned on her that she was fighting a losing battle. Jasper watched her eyes shift, calculating, no doubt trying to hatch a hasty retreat.
Not this time.
With a swift block to her kick from the left, he’d lunge at her, tipping her off balance, pinning her to the ground with his hand clasped around her delicate neck, face inches from hers, close enough to bite.
But her warm hand was on his chest, where his dead heart was.
They were locked in an impasse, neither willing to let the other go first, to admit defeat. Though if anything it was clear from the way the fight had gone down, Jasper had the upper hand right from the beginning and was going easy on Adeline. She was no match to his superior ability or skills and would’ve lost eventually.
The defeat left her livid. He could feel her piercing glare and the venomous loathing seeping under his skin. But he’d rather her hate him then be apart from her for another minute, and he was worried that the minute he loosened his grip, he would lose her once again.
“Jasper, let’s invite our guest into the house, shall we?”
Carlisle’s soothing voice broke the two out of their chokehold on each other. Adeline glared at Jasper again, finally moving her hand away only to slap away his clasp on her neck. She stood up in fury and without a backward glance, stalked into the house.
*
Yes. Yes. Yes.
She could see him in broad daylight now. They had fought and she had lost. He was no longer the same Jasper she had known all those years ago, not the simple farm boy who had courted her nor the charming Major she had watched climb the ranks of the Souther army. Here was the man changed, replaced by a monster, stronger, faster, who had honed and mastered his own weaponries over the last century.
There was no mistaking now, Jasper Whitlock was a vampire.
And it infuriated her all the more because how could he throw away all his human life and pleasures, after everything she had sacrificed for him?!
“Well?” Adeline barked impatiently as she turned to face the family crowding around her in the living room, more had joined seemingly from out of nowhere. There was the little one’s family though she herself was absent; and then there was her woman from the bar in Minnesota hoovering close behind Jasper, as well as another two pair of couples.
“I haven’t got all day.” She snapped to no one in particular.
The leader, stepped forward to stand next to Jasper. Blonde hair carefully swept back neatly, in a tailor made suit. Adeline spared a glance at her worn out sweater and jeans and momentarily felt ashamed for her own tardiness. “I don’t suppose we’ve all formally met. My name is Carlisle Cullen, this is my family. From my understanding, Jasper and you have been long acquaintances-”
“Fair enough.” Adeline muttered, eyeing the latter who was quietly observing her severely in return. Oh how she wished she could gouge those golden orbs out.
“Esme here.” Carlisle now gestured at the honey blonde close to him. “She’s my mate. The others are my children, Edward, Bella, Rosalie, Emmett and Alice. Only Alice and Jasper are not my direct or indirect sires, they joined the coven voluntarily.”
That caught her attention and Adeline shot another glance at Jasper. So then, this well-spoken gentleman was not the one who had turned Jasper then. She wondered briefly who the culprit had been.
“And no doubt you’ve already met Renesmee, our youngest. She is Bella and Edward’s child.”
Adeline trailed her eyes onto the couple. Edward was scrutinising her reaction while Bella shifted uncomfortably. “You had the child before she was turned?” She directed her question towards the man. “How very rash.” And stupid. Adeline thought to herself.
She did not miss the small frown on Edward’s face.
“We did not know then, that I was… that we were capable of making a baby between a vampire and human.” Was his guarded reply. “We had never met another hybrid before it. And we paid the price with the Volturi.”
“The Volturi came for your child?” That piqued her interest.
“Yes.” Edward nodded. “We barely avoided conflict and a bloodbath.”
Well, that was interesting information. Her fury at Jasper momentarily set aside, Adeline stopped to process this new piece of information.
“What did you say or do to have them off your back? Because I can’t imagine them being all too accepting with the news. Especially if they’ve never met or seen a hybrid before. They’d be wary of it and keen to destroy before word could spread.”
“There’s a coven of hybrids in South America.” Alice, the girl from the bar butted in with her shrill little voice. “Jasper and I managed to track them down and we were able to learn of the basics of your kind. They had to leave when they couldn’t find another threat.”
Adeline's brows shot up in surprise. “There’s a coven of hybrids in South America? What of them now then?”
“We aren’t sure.” Carlisle finally answered after a moment of silence. “But we have our own speculations.”
“No violation of the sacred laws of the Volturi will ever go unpunished.”
Adeline’s thoughts unconsciously wandered back to her father as she mulled over Carlisle’s words thoughtfully, a hand over her chin. A breech in the laws… Punishments…
“What of you then?” Edward’s question roused her from her thoughts and back to the present.
“What of me?” Adeline echoed in feigned innocence.
“Your maker.” Edward was looking at her squarely in the eye. A hint of hostility lingering at the back of his voice. “Last I remembered, you were quite adamant that my daughter was not to trust her own makers. I can’t imagine why.”
Adeline felt the corner of mouth twitched in annoyance. What a petty, narrow minded man he was. “Well I’m sorry but not everyone lives a sequestered, pampered life like you do, Mr Edward.” She flashed him a wide fake smile. “And no, I'm not interested in divulging in my private life with the likes of strangers.” As if she was going to tell them of Father and her siblings. Although she hated one half of them and felt indifferent towards the other half, there were still a few precious ones in her family she would wish to keep safe. She didn’t quite trust the Cullens enough, and certainly not Jasper, to reveal too much of her private life to them. There was no guarantee that the Volturi would be kind for a second or third time. There was no guarantee the family did not have any ties or agreement with the Volturi.
She was engaged in a heated stare off with Edward when she glimpsed Jasper fighting to keep his face stoic.
“What?” She snapped. “What’re you smiling at?”
“You know, Adeline. I would hold my thoughts closer to myself if I were you when Edward’s around.” Jasper was evidently trying and failing to suppress a smirk as the corner of his lips tugged upwards. “He’s a telepath.”
Adeline snapped her head towards Edward so quick she thought she was giving herself whiplash. She felt herself blanched as she thought of all the things that Edward would now know before resolutely slamming a mental wall over her mind.
Motherf- She had been duped! Again! This was a trap all along! And in coming here she had willingly fallen headfirst into it like a moth to a fire!
With a frustrated growl, Adeline turned and stalked straight out of the house.
She should never have come!
“Adeline. Adeline.”
She kept striding forward, ignoring Jasper’s voice even as it followed her, getting closer and closer until he was close enough to grab her by the arm.
“Adeline!”
“What is it that you want?” Adeline hissed still fuming, as she pulled her hand away from his grasp. “I came because I thought you wanted to talk like real adults. But I guess that was never your intention!”
“Adeline, you know it’s never my intention to harm you.” He sighed in response.
“You didn’t have to stalk me, and certainly not my sister. She was innocent.”
“And you know you wouldn’t have come on your free will if I hadn’t done that.” Jasper murmured, somewhat akin to a wounded puppy. For a split second she thought she had a glimpse of his guilt but she wouldn’t let it cloud her judgement. She was supposed to be angry, and she had every right to be so.
She was not the perpetrator in this.
Or so she convinced herself.
“Look, fine. You got me.” Adeline threw her hands up in resignation and sighed. “I’m a hybrid, my father is a vampire, all my siblings are half vampires. I’ve been alive since 1789; I was a hybrid when I met you, I’m still one now. Does that satisfy your question?”
“Why did you leave?” Jasper eyed her cautiously, wary of her sudden forthcomingness.
“I left because I wanted to.” The lie rolling out of her mouth was surprisingly so much easier than she thought it would be. “There’s no deeper meaning in it than that.”
“Bullshit.” Jasper growled dangerously.
Adeline feigned annoyance and shook her head with a sigh. “Sometimes the truth is just harder to accept, Jasper.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“It’s not up to you to decide.” She looked away then and heaved another sign.
There was a heaviness in the air and it made her squirm uncomfortably. For all the intimacy they had shared together all those years ago, it felt like they were two strangers right now. But they might as well be.
People change all the time. And for all that it may, she wasn’t the same girl Jasper Whitlock had courted a century and a half ago. She had long since buried her naivety and innocence in the passage of time.
She had become a stranger to him, just as he had become a stranger to her now.
There was no sense in any sort of rekindling of any kind.
“I think I’m gonna go now.” Adeline mumbled without even looking up.
“Wait.” She felt his strong hand on her wrist again, stopping her from motion. “Not yet.”
“What?”
She turned back, confused to see the new determination in his eyes.
“Aren’t you curious?”
“Curious about what?”
“Have you ever thought, how did Jasper manage to find me? How did Jasper manage to track me down? Because clearly you have some sort of instinctive self preservative and concealment ability and I’m guessing that it’s usually close to impossible to track you.”
“And?” She couldn’t see where this was going. Really, it was a waste of time.
“Haven’t you ever given thought to just what kind of beings possesses such an ability?”
“You’re wasting time talking in circles.” She declared.
“Come on darling.” She hated that knowing smirk on his face. It was equally becoming and also frustrating to look at. “Tick tock. Think.”
Adeline squinted at the man in front of her suspiciously. Just what in God’s name was he implying? What kind of being would be able to track someone down easily. The obvious answer would be: a tracker. But she knew this was not what Jasper was trying to get at given his specific veiled remark. So then… what?
“Especially when there’s a bond involved?”
That snapped her out of her reverie.
“I don’t believe you!” Adeline spluttered in indignation. “Bullshit! I… I’m not going to fall for that load of crap!” Jasper’s calm demeanour only spurred on her anger. “You’re suggesting a soulmate bond?! Impossible!”
“Calm down darlin-”
“Calm down?” Adeline echoed after Jasper, incredulous. “Are you… are you hearing yourself?”
“Yes I am.” The straight face he was giving her, it was just too much!
“Those things don’t exist Jasper.” She tried to implore, to talk some sense into that thick skull of his, which seemed to have grown in thickness since the last time they had met.
“You wanna bet?” He shot her a cocky smile, and her heart began to thump rapidly. Out of indignation, not excitement. She said to herself.
“You can bet your pretty little head that when I’m done I’m going to serve it on a silver platter!”
“You do remember that I know where your little sister is, don’t you?”
“Are you threatening me?”
“Come now. That’d be low even for me.”
“Fuck you!”
Oh that cocky smirk. Her rage was coming back on full now and Jasper had been doing nothing but fanning the flames of her anger every given chance. Some part of her mind, the part still capable of rational thought, nagged at her.
And why are you so irritated by the accusation?
Because this is incredulous. She thought to herself.
“Come on, darling. Prove me wrong.”
When she made no move to reply, Adeline felt a hand clasping around hers. And cold as it may be, the gentleness of the caress reminded her for the first time in a long while, of a time she thought had already escaped her all those years ago. She looked up at his tawny eyes, for the first time since their reunion, they held nothing but a vulnerability, a deep longing that came from a depth that she was afraid to venture in. She had to turn away for fear of drowning in those liquid topaz.
“Stay… stay for a month.” He continued to coax, soothingly, his voice like silk in her ears and she felt an artificial wave of calm trying to wrap around her. “Prove yourself right and prove me wrong. Prove that I’m an obsessive psychopathic lunatic who’s just been randomly pulling crazy ideas out of thin air.”
Adeline swallowed. This would be a very bad idea, this would be a very very bad idea. “What’s in this for me?”
“If I can’t convince you by the end of the month.” She watched him lick his lips, a nervous tick of his that only ever seems to emerge when the two were alone. “I’ll leave you alone for good.”
“Deal.” She found herself say in reply. Though deep down, there was a sense of wrong, that she had committed yet another mistake, had willingly walked into another trap of his. With her years behind her, if anything they should have taught her to be smarter, to be more level-headed and calculating.
So why was she agreeing to this crazy suggestion?
Adeline held his gaze searchingly for a moment. Finally forcing herself to speak, her voice momentarily caught in her throat.
“You’ve changed, Jasper.”
*
“You’ve changed, Jasper.”
Him, changed? Jasper was surprised by the irritation the statement had stirred in him.
“How so?” He tried to keep his voice even, but there was a tremor in it, one he hoped Adeline would not catch ahold of.
“You…” He watched as she frowned inwardly, searching for the right word to say. “You didn’t used to be so… so manipulative.”
That struck a chord in his heart.
“You’ve set traps for me at every turn.” The accusation was salt on his wound and it stung so badly. But she was not entirely wrong.
“You got to do what you got to do to survive in my world.”
“Your world?”
“Yes, my world.”
He suddenly felt an unsalvageable gulf between the two of them. Adeline was right, he had changed, by the Civil War, by Maria and his bloodlust filled life. Life had forced to him to be ruthless and militaristic, to exploit every little weakness his opponents had, to manipulate every emotion exuberated. Life with Cullens had softened him considerably, but he had not lost this skill he had honed over the century. And in times of need, the Major in him always resurfaced.
“But can you say the same for yourself?”
Adeline had changed too.
He scrutinised her pretty face closer, searching for some semblance of the lover he had lost all those years ago.
She had once compared him to the different intervals of the day. He was the afternoon, warm and welcoming, when the sun was just right, when the sunlight wasn’t too harsh and the warmth from it shrouded one in a blanket of sleep. And he had compared her to midday, when the sun was at its highest, when the light was intense and at its strongest.
Now the light seemed to be gone from her. She was a new moon, when even the light of the moon had spun away, hidden in the dark night. And he realised how little he knew of her just as she knew nothing of his. What had happened to have taken away her sun?
He watched as Adeline frowned before moving away uncomfortably under his intense gaze.
An air of hesitancy shrouded around Adeline, growing stronger by the minute. No doubt their conversation had brought great unease to the girl now; for the first time, the two of them realised just how little they know of the other. Of all the changes the other had gone through since their breakup.
And it seemed that, neither was quite willing to let the other in.
With the loss of innocence, it wasn’t near impossible for them to bare their soul and heart to the other in a heartbeat, without scruples.
For fear of more injuries, for fear of ripping out new wounds amongst old scars. For all the shame they had gone through in the years since passed.
“We’ve all changed.”
But the final verdict seemed wronged, and it aroused in him a sense of dissatisfaction from the depths of his chest. Gnawing at him. It didn’t feel right, he hadn’t intended to push her away even further when he lured her here. He had wanted to reconnect with her, to rebuild whatever was lost between them. To pick up from wherever they had departed.
And it only seemed to distance her even further away.
Jasper frowned in distaste and turned towards the house again.
“Come. I’ll show you to your room.”
#jasper hale x reader#jasper hale x oc#jasper hale imagine#jasperhale#twilight angst#twilight imagine
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Aim | Part Two
Warnings; treachery, threats, mentions of torture, mentions of smut, implied smut, mentions of death, cliffhanger.
A/N; I made Bucky a bit more self aware for this imagine, just thought that it would fit a bit better.
The fight was fair, frighteningly so. As the soldier threw you, you collided with a car, leaving Steve to defend himself. Their combat continued, as you slithered up and around the car, you were waiting. Waiting for the perfect moment to strike.
The soldier clashed his metal condiment against the vibranium shield that was in Steve’s tight grasp, and then the captain flung the hitman over its circumference. He landed fine, and without his all concealing mask.
A look of a soloist shock grasped the blonde’s features. This was his friend before him, the boy he had grown up with in the past, alive, even after that lethal fall from the train. “Bucky?” He asked with a frown, however the opposing man’s face remained stoic.
“Who the hell is Bucky?” He truly did not know, you were aware of that much, however you made a move to stand, stumbling closer to the confused and tortured soul.
“Barnes.” You growled at him, his head turning to focus on you, encouraged by your voice and not the surname that had surpassed your lips.
His head tilted at the sight of you, he was about to disappear, however he remained as Brock and his men closed in. “Good to see you again y/n.” He squinted at you, his voice monotone.
“I’d that what Pierce told you to say?” You barked back, standing strong against the super soldier. But it appeared that wasn’t the right move, as his blue eyes flickered between you and his former friend.
“I know that he put you in the avengers for a reason, and it sure as hell wasn’t to make friends.” His statement made you freeze and gulp all at once. “Say it, and I will spare your life, draga.”
It was a weight on your chest, a burden that you had been cursed by, and so you lowered your head, all to aware of the fact that Steve, Nat and Sam were in close enough range to hear you.
“Hail HYDRA.” It was practically poison leaving your mouth, a line that no longer spoke truth to this version of yourself. The soldier’s blue eyes latched onto your own, and it practically hypnotised your, urging you to come forward, and follow him into the depths of the deadly organisation.
“Y/n.” Steve called out your name, you were obliged with him as your captain to answer, but you couldn’t bare to face him. He had taught you how to fight for the right things, rather than just follow orders that were handed out. But here you were, treacherously walking away from him, and presumptuously your team also.
Bucky began to walk, and as the trophy of HYDRA, you followed after him, knowing that he would lead you to Pierce, the one who had put you in this set up from the beginning.
🏹
“I think the sight of him, threw her off track.” Nat spoke, after they had escaped with Hill, and it was revealed that Fury was indeed, alive. It was both a shock and a relief, as Steve was feeling about a couple of things himself.
“That’s ironic, considering that she had planned for things to go in the opposite direction.” The captain sighed, confused and hurt by all the new revelations. “She knew all along who he was, and she knew that she was placed as an avenger for a cause that did not serve the one that she pretended it to.”
“She’s never trusted anyone because of Barnes.” She felt awful, knowing that all along you had been used as a pawn, she knew how that felt, and it made her sick to her stomach. “But maybe he’s the only one that she has trusted, even despite what he did to her. They’d all have hurt her, and as she said, he gave her that scar when she was nineteen, there’s been time before and after that.”
He was aware that Natasha was trying to reason with him, and although you were quite and secured in secrecy, he wanted to save you, the same as Bucky.
🏹
“Well done indeed y/n.” Pierce greeted you, the soldat hovering over your shoulder silently. “Without you, we’d have never knew where Fury was in the first place, nor would you have intel on each of the individuals that wish to take us down.
Simultaneously , you nodded and gulped, awaiting approval to speak. He never gave you any, so you stood beside the soldier, until the message and confirmation of your allowance was received.
“Thankyou dad.” You turned once you were dismissed, gripping onto Bucky’s arm, and dragging him to a private destination. You needed a distraction, and so did he, albeit he was confused by the man on the bridge, and the fact that he would most probably not remember the interaction afterwards.
It was a bleak room, with a cot; the luxury of your room. As you walked in, the stench of guilt filled it, and you knew why that feeling resonated from you. You were disappointed in yourself, for betraying those that were allegedly your own team. But that had been the mission from the start, this ending was inevitable.
“You did good out there.” The winter soldier closed the door to the room, standing beside you and brushing your hair to the side to reveal the skin of your neck. His breath ghosted over the flesh, making it tingle as you awaited for him to make a supplementary move. “For a moment, I was convinced that you were on their side.”
You remained silent, knowing that it should have been the one that you chose, however you leaned back into the hardy chest of the super soldier, and licked your lips. “I would never be, SHIELD took everything from me, and the avengers, well they’re basically their pets.”
“Good.” He praised you, grasping onto your hips, and pulling them flush against his hardness. “Otherwise, you know I’d have to kill you, and none of us want that.”
It was a threat, and for some reason, it happened to turn you on more. So you turned, lacing your fingers into his wavy hair, and pulling his lips to your own. “I know what I want, and it sure as hell isn’t your teasing. So unless you want me to tell my father that you were making advances on me, then you’ll get on with it.”
It was always the same pattern, whenever Pierce knew of Barnes’ intimacy with you, his brain would be shocked into submission, and he’d forget. But somehow through his recovery he always gravitated towards you, and the inevitable would play out.
With your command spoke, the soldier ripped your shirt from your body, his one cold, and the other warm hand brushing over his flesh. It was as though he were trying to engrain every feature into his mind, so that Pierce could not wash it away.
In a lack of patience, your lips collided with his. This was the only thing that made the man feel human, rather than a commanded robot, that was used as an assassin, and a high level threat.
“Don’t forget me this time.” You told him, brushing your nose against the bridge of his own. Since he had seen Steve, you knew that they would try and remove his memories once more, but you feared that you wouldn’t be alive after his refreshment.
You were thinking of doing something stupid, something that would probably get you killed. It was a cause you had learnt to believe in, it would make you an avenger, a hero even after your death.
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky oneshot#bucky barnes imagine#bucky x you#bucky barnes series#bucky x female reader#bucky barnes imagines#bucky x y/n#bucky x reader#bucky x enhanced!reader#bucky barnes x y/n#the winter solider imagine#the winter solider x reader#the winter solider fanfiction#mcu x you#avengers x y/n#avenger reader#avengers x reader#avengers x fem!reader#imagines#imagine#xreader#marvel imagines#hydra x reader#mcu x reader
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you’ve managed to give me an unquenched taste for nhs/jzx, and now i’ve come crawling back for more. them with 69 please (maybe a/b/o, you do a good job with it)? love your stuff!
“This is all your fault anyway,” Nie Huaisang grumbled, burrowing himself further into his pile of embroidered cushions.
Jin Zixuan, kneeling next to the bed, made an effort not to roll his eyes. He had learned, over the past few months, that it was a dreadful idea. Nie Huaisang, already capricious because his brother spoiled him, had become quite temperamental as of late. It was bad enough when he started shouting and arguing, but sometimes he started crying when he was upset, and that was just the worst.
Besides, he knew that Nie Huaisang didn’t really blame him for this situation. It had been Nie Huaisang who had suggested they fool around, after Jin Zixuan’s engagement had fallen through, and it was Nie Huaisang again who had professed that there really wasn’t much of a chance of any consequences for said fooling around. An omega outside of heat wasn’t that fertile, Nie Huaisang had said, and neither were betas in general, he’d added. Between a mother who had ordered him to never share anyone’s bed until marriage and considered she’d done her job educating him, and a father who’d given him a list of brothels for his fourteenth birthday and told him to figure things out himself (a list Jin Zixuan had promptly burned, terrified his mother might find it and punish him), Jin Zixuan hadn’t been in a position to do anything except trust his friend.
A mistake, as it had turned out.
A huge mistake. Nearly as huge as Nie Huaisang’s round stomach.
“More tea,” Nie Huaisang demanded.
Jin Zixuan immediately obeyed, pouring some fresh tea for the other boy.
“How was the archery contest then?” Nie Huaisang asked after taking a sip. “Da-ge said you placed well?”
“I came third,” Jin Zixuan confirmed, picking a slice of peach from the tray he’d brought, and holding it for Nie Huaisang to bite into, which he did. “Only because Lan Wangji threw a tantrum though, so I feel I didn’t do so well. Everyone wondered why you weren’t there, by the way. Jiang Cheng was very cross.”
“He’s always cross anyway,” Nie Huaisang retorted, before opening his mouth to silently demand another slice of peach. Jin Zixuan obeyed of course. “Did they figure anything was off?”
Jin Zixuan shook his head. Although Jiang Cheng had seemed somewhat suspicious, when Nie Mingjue hinted that he just didn’t like to bring his brother in Wen territory, not even for a discussion conference, everyone bought into it. Who would have imagined the truth, anyway? Nie Huaisang acted a little flirty with everyone, but he was the one person everyone would have assumed to be knowledgeable enough to avoid such a situation.
Even if somehow the news breached out, who would suspect Jin Zixuan of fathering that child though? Although they had become quite close in private, in public Jin Zixuan had still acted aggravated by his friend’s antics in public, to the point of usually refusing to acknowledge they were friends at all. It would have been easy to pretend this situation had nothing to do with him, to leave Nie Huaisang to his trouble and go on with his own life without ever thinking of his bastard child, except to remember in the future that it couldn’t be used as a match for the legitimate children he’d have with a spouse chosen by his parents.
It would have been easy.
It would have been what his father would have done, what his mother would have encouraged, still hoping for an alliance with the Jiang.
Instead Jin Zixuan had run to Qinghe the instant he’d received a letter from his friend hinting at his predicament, and hadn’t left again for months, not until his father threatened to come get him by force if he didn’t show up at the discussion conference in Nightless City. Even then, he’d refuse to go home with his parents, pretending he was tired of Lanling and wanted to explore and Night Hunt on his own. He’d managed to convince his mother that his father’s behaviour disgusted him too much to be around him lately, and his father that he’d found a pretty face to have fun with in Qinghe.
It wasn’t even a lie. Nie Huaisang really was pretty, and Jin Zixuan really despised his father for all the bastards he’d sired and abandoned over the country.
“I wish I had been there with everyone,” Nie Huaisang sighed. “It would have been fun.”
“It really wasn’t,” Jin Zixuan insisted. “The Wen were furious to have lost their own tournament, your brother says they’re probably going to retaliate in some way.”
Surprised to hear this, Nie Huaisang sat a little straighter in his nest of cushions.
“Da-ge said told me there was nothing to worry about!”
Jin Zixuan winced, and offered his friend another slice of peach as a distraction. It didn’t quite work, Nie Huaisang pushed away the piece of fruit and frowned.
“Since when does da-ge even talk to you? Wasn’t he mad about…” Nie Huaisang gestured at his round stomach. “Did you two make up?”
Jin Zixuan shrugged. He didn’t know where he stood with Nie Mingjue. The man had punched him in the face hard enough to break his nose when Jin Zixuan had told him he was responsible for Nie Huaisang’s predicament, and then refused all of Jin Zixuan’s offer for an honour marriage. But at the same time, he hadn’t kicked Jin Zixuan out of the Unclean Realm yet, and didn’t seem to mind that Jin Zixuan was spending most of his time in Nie Huaisang’s room now that Nie Huaisang couldn’t appear in public.
It would be a far cry to say that Nie Mingjue liked Jin Zixuan, but he might have somewhat approved of him, at that was already more than Jin Zixuan would have expected.
“I wonder if this is it,” Nie Huaisang sighed, flopping back against his cushions with a sour expression. When Jin Zixuan threw him an inquisitive look, he clarified: “I mean, if there will be a war. I know Qinghe Nie is ready for it, da-ge made sure of it, but the others… well, first of all, for small sects it’s a big risk. And then… the Lans are pacifists, Jiang zongzhu is the backbone of overcooked noodles, and your father…”
Nie Huaisang hesitated, but there was nothing he could say that Jin Zixuan hadn’t already thought.
“My father is pretty likely to side with the Wen, unless they insult him somehow,” Jin Zixuan said, and while Nie Huaisang grimaced, he still nodded a touch too fast.
“If he does, what will you do?” Nie Huaisang asked.
The question, asked with affected casualness, took Jin Zixuan by surprise, but not as much as the speed and intensity with which the answer hit him.
“I’ll fight alongside your brother,” he exclaimed, taking one of Nie Huaisang’ hands in both of his. “I’ll protect your and our… and your child, no matter what.”
Nie Huaisang’s eyes went wide at that earnest declaration. He quickly looked away, trying to discreetly blink away a few tears.
“Nobody’s asking you to do that,” Nie Huaisang mumbled. “I’m… you don’t even like me all that much. You don’t need to turn against me for someone you just happened to fuck once or twice, someone’s that’s not even your friend.”
It was Jin Zixuan’s turn to stare with wide eyes.
There was that funny thing about Nie Huaisang. Because he was the first one to point out his faults, the first one to laugh at his own expense, because he never took himself seriously, it was easy to think he really didn’t care what others thought of him. But he listened and memorised everything that was said or done, and took it to heart.
“You are my friend,” Jin Zixuan retorted. More than a friend, perhaps. He’d really enjoyed Nie Huaisang’s company even in Gusu, and after several months in each other’s company, with this child they’d have in just two or three weeks… maybe it wasn’t only friendship anymore, though it definitely was that as well. “And do you think I could ever look at myself in a mirror if I abandoned my friend, my child?”
“And since you’re so vain, it’d be hard for you to live without mirrors,” Nie Huaisang said with a devious smile that made Jin Zixuan want to… but they hadn’t kissed since he’d rushed to Qinghe months ago. It used to be Nie Huaisang initiating everything, but he hadn’t started anything all this time, so to Jin Zixuan the message was clear. He might have started feeling more than he ought to, but Nie Huaisang probably didn’t want anything but friendship. “You really would stay here with m… with us?” Nie Huaisang insisted. “Against your family?”
“At this point, aren’t you family as well?” Jin Zixuan asked, one of his hands letting go of Nie Huaisang’s to come and rest on his round stomach. Right then the child was quiet, but he could still feel its bursts of spiritual energy now that the date of birth was approaching. “Both of you are who I want to be with.”
“You’re so stupid,” Nie Huaisang grumbled, putting his free hand over Jin Zixuan’s on his belly. “If you keep that up, I’ll tell da-ge to say yes if you ask again that we marry, and then where will we be?”
“Together,” Jin Zixuan replied, his heart thundering in his chest. “So maybe I’ll ask again, while we can.”
“Idiot,” Nie Huaisang grumbled, turning away as if that could hide how red his face was turning. “I hope the baby is smarter than you.”
“Hopefully it’ll get your brain, my good looks, and your brother’s good sense.”
Nie Huaisang, still looking away, still red in the face, laughed. It was the most beautiful sound in the world, and Jin Zixuan hoped he would continue hearing it for the rest of his life, however short or long that might be.
#sangxuan#jin zixuan#nie huaisang#mo dao zu shi#mdzs#a/b/o#jau writes#today in things that could so easily go so wrong because of canon...#Anonymous
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Genya tailoring wylan while he explains everything that went down to his older sister and brother zoya and Nikolai
W: ok so he says I’m going to music school right? And I’m like “hmmm sus but on ig” and like it’s all the way in another place so I’m like when I’m there I’ll just
N: book it?
W: EXACTLY book it. BUT YA WANNA KNOW WHAT HE DID. THE CONVIER
Z: tell us
W: HE TRIED TO HAVE ME KILLED
everyone in the room collectively chokeing while wylans still talking
W in a tone much more Jovel and annoyed then should be for discussing attempted murder: AND LIKE, ok I’m a little annyoed by the whole attemped infantacide thing but like, THEY DIDNT EVEN TRY??? LIKE they could shot me, or stabbed me, or punched me or EVEN LIKE IDK boat out to sea and throw me over but nOoOoOo, they try get this. Choking.me.out WE ARENT EVEN FULLY OUT OF THE CANEL YET AND THEYRE NOT EVEN CUTTING OFF MY AIRWAY. Kinda sad how bad they were at that. So I konked em and jumped overboard and - wait why are your guys faces like that
Z,G n N: no reason at all continue
Okay... I am so much better with drama than comedy, so this turned into a drama, but it DOES include the major beats of Wylan telling his Ravkan friends about Jan! I hope you like it :)
Wylan hadn’t been sure he could say it at first. “Miss Genya.” Was that too forward? Would it tip off the others? He had thus far kept his Ravkan connections secret. Kaz would have wanted to leverage that somehow.
He had been close to tears of frustration when Jesper stayed in the room. Wylan wanted to talk to her alone, but Jesper, going halfway mad from his impatience, had stayed so long with him…
When Jesper left to grab a cup of coffee, Genya spoke first.
“Are you all right?”
Wylan nodded. “I wasn’t for a long time, but I made it.”
“When this is over, you can come with us.”
His throat ached to hear it. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to go. He wasn’t halfway to tears at the prospect of going to Ravka. He was halfway to tears at the prospect of being wanted.
“But maybe you’d rather stay with that cute boy, hmm?”
Wylan blushed.
“Good, keep blushing. Keep your circulation strong.”
They didn’t get much time to talk before Jesper returned. Wylan wasn’t sure how much the Ravkans would want him revealing about their connection, so he kept himself quiet on the subject and trusted Genya to understand that when he thanked her, he meant for all of it, for fixing him, for having been his friend.
He got his answer not long after.
About how much the Ravkans wanted him to tell.
Jesper and Wylan were on the settee together, enjoying the closeness. The kiss seemed to have spoken some promise of access to one another—nothing too intimate. Just long, clever fingers in Wylan’s hair while he leaned against Jesper.
“Jesper. Wylan.”
At Kaz’s voice, they both turned. Wylan only stood when he realized who was with him.
Nikolai had been a steady presence in Wylan’s life. A mentor, a friend. A brother. He had been someone worth sticking around for. Seeing him there, standing beside Kaz, Wylan wanted to go to him. But Sturmhond had only ever been there to “escort him to Ravka”. They were not publicly friends, and every secret even implied to Dirtyhands…
“Our new friends would like a word, Wylan,” Kaz said.
“Privately,” Sturmhond added.
Wylan took a step toward him before Kaz asked, “Why?”
“Surely you can understand—”
“And you can understand the need for a little oversight.”
“Not from you, Brekker.” Ah, there was the Zoya Nazyalensky he knew and loved!
Nikolai looked to Wylan. “Ignore him,” he said.
So Wylan stepped forward and hugged the privateer. Nikolai had the same impulse. For a moment they held on tight to one another and Wylan had that same soreness in his throat he had felt with Genya.
“Whatever he did to you, you didn’t deserve it.”
Wylan swallowed.
Nikolai had been the closest Wylan had ever seen him to furious when he found out. He offered to keep Wylan in Ravka, but there was no way to do that without starting an international incident. He sent a letter, even, but Jan refused and it wasn’t everyone who would kidnap a Councilman’s kid.
Telling Nikolai seemed… possible, but Wylan glanced at Kaz. And at Jesper.
“Um… since when are you friends with pirates?” Jesper asked.
“Privateer,” Wylan and Nikolai said.
Wylan looked between Jesper and Kaz. They both had questions—albeit very different ones.
“Jan sent men to kill me,” Wylan said.
“What?” asked Jesper.
Zoya said something Wylan was pretty sure was a Ravkan swear. They had all made a game of not teaching him the naughty words, so he could only guess.
Kaz looked intrigued.
Nikolai gripped Wylan’s shoulder tightly.
Wylan shook his head. Somehow remembering that day on the browboat made his throat hurt. “I was sloppy. They shouldn’t’ve been able to get me. I remembered that move Tolya taught me, but—I’m fine! Why are you looking at me like that?”
“No reason at all,” Zoya said.
Jesper was stroking his revolvers, a gleam in his eyes.
“I’m fine,” Wylan insisted. He was! He just wished that ache in his throat would ease. “I’m fine! Anyway it was six months ago!”
“He knew you had a place in Os Alta,” Nikolai said.
Somehow that stung the worst, because it was true. Jan didn’t have to kill Wylan. He had shut him out of the business years ago, so there were no secrets to spill, no treason to commit. Just last summer Nikolai had offered to keep Wylan there, made clear he was welcome, Jan could have… but he wanted to…
Wylan took a deep breath. His eyes were prickling like he might start crying again, in front of all these people!
To make it worse, in the split second Wylan had that realization, someone else had come into the room.
“Wylan has a place in Os Alta?” Nina asked. Matthias, beside her, looked grimmer than usual. “You mean his family owns property there?”
“The King has a soft spot for lost princes,” Zoya said. “And redheads.”
“You know King Nikolai?”
“Of course she does, I’m sure the whole Triumvirate knows him!” Jesper said, and Wylan wanted to kiss him again for redirecting the conversation when it was all getting to be a bit much. Kaz was watching him closely. Nina was staring. Zoya and Nikolai were both dealing with what Wylan had told them and he felt foolish for having done so now. Maybe all he had wanted was for them to say it was okay he wasn’t able to use the skills he learned sailing when Tolya tried teaching him to fight.
“I meant Wylan,” Nina retorted. She turned her attention to him once more.
“I visited him in Os Alta a few times,” Wylan said. He left out the time Nikolai, then a student at the university, had come to visit him in Ketterdam.
“This would have been useful to know earlier, Wylan,” Kaz said.
Which was a good reason not to tell him!
“Wait a minute,” Jesper realized, “we actually could have ransomed you! Hey! Kaz’s plan almost worked!”
“Almost,” Wylan repeated, deeply dubious. Kaz had never tried to ransom him to Nikolai. “N—um, not that I’m recommending ransoming me. Um, I… the thing is… it’s my mother. She was—my father had her locked away and I—if I could…”
“King Nikolai will doubtless do all he can to assist you,” said King Nikolai, despite everything clearly amused at speaking in third person. “And your mother. As any good king would. Exceptional, even! But I must insist on a private word.”
This time even Kaz didn’t object. Wylan felt a twinge of guilt leaving Jesper and cast him a look he hoped communicated an intention to tell him everything later. He followed Nikolai into the next room, anyway. Although Nikolai had never shown him any frustration or disapproval, Wylan still worried. What if this was it? What if he had reached his limit?
Nikolai was not at his limit.
Instead, he said, “It’ll be all right, Wylan.”
“You’ll help us?” Wylan asked. “Me and my friends.”
He nodded. That was already the deal, Wylan supposed, but he still appreciated hearing it from Nikolai instead of having to trust it from Kaz.
“Is there anything you didn’t want to tell me in front of the others?” Nikolai asked.
“No.” The ache in his throat was back. Wylan swallowed. He blinked rapidly, but his eyes wouldn’t listen. “He tried to kill me…”
Nikolai squeezed Wylan’s shoulder.
“Brekker is a… unique sort, but I doubt there’s anything he can’t think his way out of. Between the two of us, we can tweak this plan if necessary. You shouldn’t have to see him.”
“Thank you,” Wylan said, “but I can take it. You don’t have to protect me.”
“I never protected you because you needed protecting, I did it because I wanted to keep you around. It helps that you look at me like I can do anything. See, that’s the one!”
Wylan found himself smiling despite it all.
“And Jesper is in love with you. You don’t always pick up on these things, but it’s very important you know this time.”
“We…” Wylan looked away, blushing. “I kissed him.”
“Well done, Wylan!”
“Whatever happens next, I’m glad I got to see you again, Nikolai.”
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