#'You threw away a promising career' / 'I sure fucking did and you can too if you stop shining boots with your tongue for a living'

[theimpossiblescheme]

Possibly controversial Doctor Who take: UNIT should never have been a military organization. I've always hated the idea of the Doctor becoming a stooge for human governments, and it's only gotten grosser as time's gone on... I think UNIT would be much more interesting as an independent research organization (hell, more of a glorified clubhouse full of nerds) rather than a defense taskforce.

Picture this: we start with Colonel Alistair Gordon Lethbridge-Stewart, shortly after his encounter with the Second Doctor and the robotic yeti. The whole affair's opened his eyes to a much wider world than he previously thought, and he's taken an interest extraterrestrial life and technology. At first, he thinks only of how this knowledge can be used to England's advantage, but soon it turns into curiosity for its own sake and a genuine urge to learn about other worlds. When another alien creature comes to Earth, Alistair just wants to talk to them if he can. So instead of shooting them on sight like the rest of his regiment, he goes out of his way to defend the alien. Alistair is dragged in front of a court martial for it, and even though he refuses to back down--the creature wasn't threatening anybody, and even if it was, it was still a cowardly move since they outnumbered it seven to one!--he's discharged from the army in disgrace. Severely disillusioned and having done some soul-searching for why he ever worked with those bastards to begin with, he starts to seek out like-minded people. People who are both disgusted with the military and curious about worlds beyond Earth. This leads him to Liz Shaw, John Benton, Jo Grant, and maybe a couple of honest-to-God aliens who've been going about their business unbothered. Maybe the alien whose life Alistair saved decides to join in as well. Together, they pool their knowledge, funds, and resources to found their own private research base to learn about all things paranormal and/or extraterrestrial. It's not a fancy or expensive affair--they're based out of Liz's house, and there's a big hand-painted KEEP OUT sign out front--but it serves their purpose. They don't bother gathering weapons or anything like that since they want to learn about visitors to Earth, not drive them away. The government and the greater Ivory Tower scientific community thinks they're naive at best and idiotic at worst, but they're long past giving a fuck. And when the Third Doctor is unceremoniously dumped on Earth by the Time Lords, the newly-formed UNIT shelters them and offers them a position as scientific advisor. Alistair might even be able to commiserate with them on "Oh, you were strung along by a bunch of close-minded shitstains who'd rather murder something new than try to understand it? Me, too, bud, let's go get drunk about it sometime."

And thus begins a grand, regeneration-spanning saga of protecting new aliens, sabotaging the military, recruiting old companions who want to carry on the Doctor's work, and giving both the Queen and the Time Lords an industrial-grade migraine. Because they're not soldiers--they're "idiots" with some books and a screwdriver, passing through, helping out, and learning as they go.

[sopiloveshobi]

Kim Fucking Namjoon

Please proceed with caution. This is a 18+ nsfw piece. I won’t spoil anything here. Had this in my head since I saw those pics from Hoseoks party. Haven’t spelled checked and haven’t written like this in ages so I hope it makes sense and is good enough!

‘You are out of your mind! You know exactly who will be at that party. I am not going!’ You answered your best friend sitting on your bed whilst she was going through your wardrobe.

‘Please please I am begging you! You know Hoseok invited me? He called me and made sure I will be there! What if tonight is the night?!’ Yu-jin pouted at you, with a begging hands.

‘What do you even mean THE night?’ You rolled your eyes at her and threw yourself back at the bed.

‘What if he kisses me tonight? What if he finally makes a move and I won’t be there because you won’t go!’ Her voice was really desperate and she was trying to hide all of the excitement she was holding inside.

‘You can still go! Just without me. I wasn’t invited, I was supposed to be your plus one anyway’ you answered sighing loudly. You wanted to go, but you also knew who you could bump into at this party. The guy who you worked with few times and who also happens to be a best friend of your best friends crush. Its not that you hated the man. But you definitely weren’t fond of him and wanted to avoid him. The man was trouble. Every time you had to work together he would come up with excuses or would refuse to cooperate. He was always late and he just simply annoyed the fuck out of you. Luckily the feeling was mutual. Because Hoseok told Yu-jin that he wasn’t keen on you either.

Kim Namjoon. Tall, incredibly wide shoulders and dark hair. Smoky, sleepy dark eyes and the perfect jaw line. Perfect looks, yet so fucking annoying.

‘Please, please. I promise I will keep you away from him and I won’t leave you on your own for too long’ she was about to say she won’t leave you at all but you both knew that won’t be the case. Because the second Hoseok will wave at her she will drop you and run to that man. And you couldn’t blame her. He was really good looking, he was successful and he did treat her really well. There was never a game that he would play with her. His intentions were pretty clear to everyone.

You rolled your eyes and sat back up on the bed.

‘Fine…’ you decided. Why would you avoid a great party, a little boogie and a drink because this jerk might be there? And even if he will, its not like he will come to harass you. It will be fine. If you will have to converse you will be civil. You bet he will be late anyway, like he always was.

‘I love love looooooove you’ Yu-jin jumped on you and tackled you down onto the bed ‘You are the best’ she giggled right into your face. You and Yu-jin have been friends for years, pretty much since school. You never left each others sides, even with careers going on and moving out of your family houses you were always there for each other. Even when her dad passed, you took care of their family and helped cook for them for few months. You were inseparable so it was natural for Yu-jin wanting to be on a very important party of her probably future boyfriend. Maybe even husband.

‘Pick my outfit though’ you moaned and pushed her off yourself. She sprang up to your wardrobe and she already had eyed out black dress with long sleeves and pair of sneakers paired with it. It was the cool kind of outfit you could never pick yourself but she was a master in this. She was the cool stylish one who would buy and gift you tons of stuff that she knew you could pull off but were too scared to experiment yourself.

You both arrived in front of the building and got out of the car. You have straightened your dress and fixed your hair. Both you check your make up and were ready to go in.

You have showed your invitation at the door and went on the top floor of the building in the lift. You were nervous. Yu-jin was excited. As always the absolute opposites. You took a deep breath as the lift reached the top floor, the door dinged and you could heard loud music already blasting. Yu-jin left first and you followed her, another person asked for the invitations which you both showed and received a bracelet to be let in. It was long until you heard the man squeak and run towards the two of you. His hair done wet like style, denim outfit, chunky chose and shades. He did look like a king of this party.

‘Its so good to see you both! So glad you made it! Yu-jin, you look so good baby’ he commented on her. He always showered her in compliments and it was great to see her being treasured. ‘You both do. Thank you so much for coming. Cocktails are on this side, snacks on the other. Yu-jin I will grab you in a bit okay? I need to welcome all the guests. Get yourself a drink and I will be right with you okay?’ He was so reassuring, made sure she felt special and taken care if. She nodded and smiled widely at him. He always took her words away, she was so stunned around him, so shy. Not the Yu-jin you know. You both swiftly moved away to the cocktail bar. You scanned the room to see if there was anyone who you known and there few people that you knew of. No sight of him. Thank fuck. You ordered your cocktail, you were just chatting to the bartender and then Yu-jin patted your shoulder.

‘Im so sorry..’ she whispered and you knew what was coming. But just as you promised yourself at home, you wouldn’t let this spoil your night. You were here for Hoseok and your friend and a little bit of good time. You turned around and then he was, at the entrance that you and Yu-jin just were few minutes ago. Top to bottom dark jeans, oversized t-shirt, long hair dark hair. Slightly overgrown. He was talking to Hoseok and scanned the room himself. And then it was. He stopped at you. Your eyes locked for just a second. Fuck. You were hoping to go by unnoticed.

There she is. He thought already annoyed at your sight. Fuck, she will be as annoying as always he thought to himself.

He moved away from Hoseok and moved towards a group of men standing on the side. He didn’t break the eye contact though. He was still staring at you. And you couldn’t let him win. He made you so competitive. Fuck he is so annoying even from so far away. You rolled your eyes and turned around back to the bar. You took a big sip of your cocktail.

‘Its fine Yu-jin, we both knew this is going to happen’ you said to your friend and continued on sipping on your drink. You definitely needed liquid courage to be able to walk about and dance on this party, in the outfit you were in, in front of a guy you really disliked. You moved along with the drink and your friend and she spotted few people she knew and wanted to say hello to. And all you could feel was his eyes on you. Even when you weren’t facing him, you could just feel him staring. It was uncomfortable but at the same time it has given you this weird confidence.

Eventually Hoseok came and grabbed Yu-jin as he promised and he basically didn’t leave her side the entire night. They would go up together to different people and he would introduce her. They did disappear at some point completely, you lost them and you panicked a little. She promised not to leave you for good and as you were turning around to look for her, you were stopped by him. Kim Namjoon. Fuck. He appeared right in front of you. Out of no where.

‘Nice to see you’ he hissed through his clenched jaw. You could hear his teeth grind. Why is he here and talking to you. You weren’t buying his bullshit.

‘Im afraid im not able to say the same’ you looked down on him. You took another sip of your drink for extra courage. No way he is going to spoil your night.

‘As polite as always I see’ he hissed back and moved away. He went around you and ordered a drink from the bartender. Of course, he couldn’t avoid you because you were stuck like a leech to the bar. You grabbed your drink and moved away. It didn’t take long and someone approached you. Also quite tall. Piercing in his lip, tattoos on his arm. Dark clothes, thick chain around his neck, drink in his hand.

‘I was told to take care of you’ he whispered to your ear. You froze. What the hell?

‘Who are you and who told you that?’ You were surprised, it wasn’t him so you weren’t completely closed off to talk to anyone else. Anyone but him.

‘Yu-jin told me to hang around for a bit. Her and Hoseok went.. to his studio. I think he will finally make things official’ you were stunned. Who is this guy. He was nice and sweet and he knew details about your friend. Wait Yu-jin told him what? ‘Jungkook’ he added at the end. Jungkook. Jungkook. You tried to remember if she ever mentioned anyone with that name. He put his hand on your waist. You froze again. ‘i was supposed to keep Namjoon away’ he added. Yu-jin im going to kill you, you thought to yourself but you were happy to take any hell at this stage. You turned around to him, keeping his hand on your waist and smiled politely.

‘I see. I also see you have been let in on all my secrets’ you chuckled and continued on your cocktail.

At that very second, when you were chuckling whilst Jungkook hand was resting on your waist Kim Namjoon has turned around from the bar to look around. Scanned the room and saw exactly that picture. He clenched his jaw and squeezed his drink a little bit too hard, he broke the glass and spilled the whiskey that was in it. It didn’t look like he hurt himself. He apologised to the bartender and ordered another drink. You noticed in the corner of your eye that he was still stating. It didn’t take long for him to approach. Of course, he couldn’t stay the fuck away could he?

‘Jungkookie, i didnt know you had a date’ he chuckled at the sight of the two of you.

‘I don’t have to tell you everything do I?’ He answered and grabbed you a little closer. You were staring at Namjoon, and he was staring staring at you. The surroundings became unbearable and steamy.

‘I didn’t know you knew each other’ you gasped and wrapped yourself around Jungkook. He wasn’t expecting that so he smirked a little when he felt your body getting closer to his. Namjoons jaw clenched again.

‘For years now’ he answered and scanned you and Jungkook up and down. He knew. He smelled it. He found out this was only a play. If Jungkook didnt smirk with a triumph like that maybe he would have been fooled. ‘Enjoy you two’ he raised his glass slightly and moved away. You could have breathing again, so you exhaled loudly.

‘What the fuck is wrong with the two of you? You really do hate each other’ Jungkook commented, partially amused at the situation and sipped on his drink. The music stopped and Hoseok appeared around the main area of the party. All lights on him.

‘Thank you for coming everyone. We will play few songs from the new album now. I hope you enjoy’ he bowed down and he went away. The music started, the lights went off again. And you felt really warm. Incredibly warm. You needed a breath of fresh air or water at your neck. You looked around and spotted a corridor leading to the bathrooms. You started walking towards it. As you started moving, you felt a pair of eyes on you. And after that movement in the corner of your eye. You rushed towards the bathrooms, closed the first door behind you and you could hear the steps behind you. You entered the bathroom and instantly opened the tap to spray some water on yourself. The door opened right behind you. And there he was. Kim fucking Namjoon.

‘What the fuck is your problem?!’ He hissed at you, half shouting and walking towards you.

‘What the fuck is YOUR problem?! This is ladys room by the way’ you answered with the same anger as he brought in.

‘Why the fuck would you act like this?’ He kept walking and nearly shouting at you. The temperature raising in the room. The tension growing like crazy because this fucking idiot was right there shouting at you. You hated his guts but at this right moment, he was insanely hot. The angrier he was getting the more you felt yourself getting wet. What the fuck. Its the most annoying guy you know, why would he make you feel like this?! ‘Why would wear something like this?’ He hissed again when he didn’t get an answer ‘and the Jungkook theatre?! Are you out of your mind?’ He continued and pointed outside when he mentioned Jungkook. What the hell was I wearing? How dares he even mention something like this.

‘Why are you even here? Why do you care?!’ You answered completely confused and out of breath as you were still really warm and dizzy.

But it was about to continue because he was now right in front of you. Nearly leaning over your, staring directly into your eyes. You were furious and so was he. And something in that tension broke because he smashed his lips on yours and sat you up on the sink.

‘What the fuck?!’ You hissed and you pushed him away. He was so annoying. So annoyingly hot. So annoying. No no. You cant be this weak. And then he came back, smashed his lips against yours and you didn’t refuse this time. Fast breathing, his hands on your legs going up. His tongue down your throat, your hand on his neck and the other in his long hair. Steamy. Steamy was the feeling, the room, the way he kissed. He picked you up holding your ass and he walked with you to a cubicle and he shut the door behind him. He sat on the closed toilet and he sat you on top of him facing him. You bit his lip and moved to his neck, slowly licking and kissing up towards the back of his ear and he whined. This single act made him whine out loud. His hands explored your ass and when he got bored he moved under your dress and moved your underwear to the side. His tongue again back deep down you throat, and the second he touched you, you whimpered into his mouth. He really wanted to play the long game but the anticipation and tension between the two of you for weeks has made it impossible. He slid his two fingers inside you and as he did so, you moaned into his mouth and he stopped kissing you.

‘You slut’ he hissed and you completely ignored what he just said to you. You slid his trousers slightly, just enough to gain access and pulled his rock hard dick that was ready for you there and there. He didn’t expect it, he opened his mouth and stared at you for a second as you started going with your hand up and down the length of it. He moved his fingers again and felt how wet you turned. You threw your head back when he started moving again. Fuck. Fuck you. You gained a little bit of clarity in your head.

‘I hate you’ you said irritated straight into his face.

‘I know’ he responded and he took his fingers out of you. He moved your hand away from his cock and lifted you slightly, his trousers fell lower down to his knees and he placed you on top of him. You poked your hand under yourself to aim him right and he just let go of you and you fell right onto him, his dick sliding into you at a fast paste and your body jerked trying to adjust to him. He gasped quietly and looked deep into your eyes. You locked your eyes with his as he slowly started moving inside you. The more pace he picked up, the more you couldn’t hold your facial expression. You leaned into him, attacking his lips and moaning in between his movements. He finally came to his senses and places one hand on your hip and the other on your ass and as he started ramming into you, you bouncing on top of him he kept kissing you back, he kept kissing you chin and your cheek, whatever was closer at the moment. His grip tightened on you and he picked up the pace even more, the both of your breath loud and shallow. He squeezed your ass and he felt you squeeze around him inside you, you closed your eyes and whispered ‘so close’ as he picked up the pace to an insane speed and you were on the edge for a minute and then he switched one of his hands and squeezed your breast. That did it, you jerked your head to the back and closed your eyes moaning insanely loud and him kissing your neck helping you ride your high. And when you did and did see the stars, you looked down on him but the pace didn’t stop. You felt him slowly twitching and then you remembered, there wasn’t a condom break. There was nothing. You stopped him and got yourself off him, your juices slowly going town your leg. He looked at you with the biggest disgust at the same time with insane admiration. And then he pulled your hair and brought you all the way down to your knees and he opened your mouth with his finger and stuck himself in your mouth. No warning, no word. He was so close he needed to finish, and you were so hot, so slutty for him. He started fucking your throat and you let him, you put your tongue on top of him and sucked him off. It didn’t take long for him to come. You heard him grunt and moan and he finally came all the way down your throat. You swallowed everything you received. Your cheeks red, pink nose, hair messed up. You looked fucked. You were fucked. And you remained on your knees as he pulled himself together and then he helped you up, he tried putting your hair back to its best but that was a fail. And when you were about to unlock the door of the cubicle without a word he put a hand on yours and stopped you. He leaned you on the door and kissed you. But not harsh and aggressively like he did before. He kissed you like he really meant it, with care and he cupped your face and stroked it. He looked into your eyes, moved you to the side and left. He left you there. Without a word. Kim fucking Namjoon. What the fuck was that? You thought to yourself when you came to your senses and walked out. Checked yourself in the mirror and you did look fucked. You tried putting yourself together with the bits you had in your bag, but who were you fooling.

As Namjoon left the bathroom fixing himself and trying to look put together, Jungkook spotted him and approached him

‘Where have you been?’ He asked staring him down.

‘Just needed to fix some things’ he answered cryptically and moved on. Went towards the bar and ordered another drink.

Not long after you came out of the bathroom and Jungkook clocked what needed fixing. Based on the state of you he put 2 and 2 together and couldn’t stop giggling.

Yu-jin couldn’t find you. She really needed to tell you the good news and you were no where to be found. And then finally she found Jungkook giggling to himself.

‘Where is she?’ She asked.

‘Oh, uhm, just there’ he pointed at you leaving the bathroom trying to brush your dress down. He giggled again. ‘What the fuck happened to her?’ Yu-jin asked.

‘Namjoon’ Jungkook responded and moved away to find Hoseok.

‘We have a lot to talk about’ she said the second she approached.

‘I have no idea what youre talking about’ you were playing along, not about to tell your best friend you just fucked with the very man you were trying to avoid.

‘Me and Hoseok! Official!’ She jumped in place and you felt relieved because it was long time coming and also gave you the time to hopefully have her forget what she just saw.

‘Im so happy for you!’ You answered and hugged her. ‘Celebratory drink?’ You asked. You desperately needed to drink.

‘Lets get itttt’ Yu-jin was in the best of moods and decided not to ask about anything for now. For now.

The party went along, most of the guests disappeared and because Yi-jin wanted to close with Hoseok, you were tagging along.

‘We will just check if we took everything from the studio and will be right here okay?’ Your best friend announced and you nodded.

‘I will wait downstairs’ you added and went into the lift.

Of course. Your luck. Who was in the vert same lift?! Kim fucking Namjoon. The door closed, nobody else inside and he just approached you. Pushed you to the wall and kissed like there was no tomorrow.

‘Jagiya…’ he whined into your mouth. You were in shock. I mean the kissing was great but the name calling?

‘Namjoon are you drunk?’ You asked and he moved him slightly to the side, breaking the kiss.

‘No, i am really not. I just cant stop thinking about you’ he admitted, scratching the back of his head.

You didn’t know what to think about it. He was annoying and always late. But the chemistry the two of you had wasn’t normal. And you couldn’t just skip it, forget it, move on from it.

‘Fine, lets go home’ you said and you put your hand out so he would hold it, but he didn’t.

‘Let me ask you out properly first. Hoseok will rip me open if he will find out… i will call you tomorrow?’ He asked. He turned… sweet? Kim fucking Namjoon, annoying and always late. The man who infuriated you for the past few months and also the very same man who grunted few hours ago as you sucked him off, was now sweet and charming and… you loved it? What the fuck was wrong with you.

‘If you won’t, the ship will sail. There is only one chance with me’ you teased him and you left the lift and he followed. And you have met Hoseok and Yu-Jin staring at the two of you holding hands, with their mouths wide open. No fucking way.

[yanderecrazysie]

Breeding with Kita

This is a day late because my internet was down.

DAY 12 OF KINKTOBER

Kink: Breeding

Pairing: Kita Shinsuke x Reader

WARNINGS: NSFW, NON-CONSENSUAL unprotected sex, yandere themes

“Promise you’ll use a condom,” you demanded, hand pressing against Kita’s bare chest before he can go any further.

Kita seemed mildly surprised, “I thought you had birth control?”

“I did! But I lost it somewhere and haven’t been able to take it in a while. I have to talk with the doctor to put in a new order.”

The man tried to act surprised but, in reality, he knew that from the start. After all, he’s the one who threw your birth control pills away.

He frowned a little. He had hoped you would trust him enough to just pull out, but you were being insistent on the use of a condom. 

He couldn’t very well breed you through plastic, could he?

“Of course,” came his smooth reply. He rooted through the nightstand, preparing to lie and say there were none and, oh no, I guess I’ll have to just pull out.

But then you were handing one over to him, smiling, saying that you came prepared.

Kita tried to keep his expression from souring. You just didn’t understand what you were meant to be. You were just confused.

Kita had greater plans for you than finishing college or working your way up in some useless career. He knew where you truly belonged- as his wife and the mother of his children.

You were meant to stay home and take care of your kids, only ever leaving to go grocery shopping or to appointments. That was the traditional dream Kita had for you and he would get it one way or another.

Kita tore open the wrapper with his teeth and pulled the condom out, rolling it down his painfully-hard cock with a hiss. How disappointing. 

Then, an idea occurred to him and he bit back a victorious grin. He wasn’t going to give up. He was going to get his way.

He pushed you back onto the bed, glad that the two of you had already done all the foreplay before putting on the condom. He needed his head clear to do this right. He grabbed your legs and hooked them around his waist before sliding in with a groan.

You were always so tight, no matter how often the two of you had sex. Your walls hugged him snugly any time he pushed into you, and he wouldn’t have it any other way. 

You let out a little moan when the head of his cock purposefully brushed against your g-spot. He’d had sex with you enough times to pinpoint exactly where it was in any position. He backed up a little before pushing back into the spot at full force. You moaned louder.

Kita did everything he could to focus his thrusts into that special spot, anything so you’d reach orgasm quicker. He reached between you both to rub at your clit, making you arch your back and practically scream in pleasure.

You hit your high even faster than he’d anticipated, and he had to hold back from following you when your walls rhythmically squeezed his cock so tightly. Instead, he waited until you were fucked out enough to pull out and turn you over onto your belly, pulling your hips up into the air to meet him. At the same time, he shimmied the condom off, pretending to miss your hole a couple of times in “excitement”.

Finally free of the plastic entrapment, Kita pushed back inside, groaning the whole way. Without the condom, everything felt so much better. Your pussy clenched around him and him alone.

He wrapped his arms around your waist, fucking into you harder.

Once you were pregnant with his kid, you wouldn’t be going anywhere. And he’d make sure to keep you well-bred at all times.

He had worked himself up far too much and was approaching his own end now. Without the condom, it felt like his cock was encased in velvet.

He dug his fingers into your hips and pumped forward a few times before slamming home, holding you still as he flooded your insides with cum.

Kita smiled and waited for you to realize what he’d just done to you.

[communicationthroughlyrics]

I Like Your Blood On My Teeth Just A Little Too Much - 18

You're a former military, career oriented security executive who has made quite the living for yourself- but it has always been lacking. Your non-committal attitude has led you down a playgirl lifestyle, never really settling. What happens when your new boss throws you a curveball, and as a result? You end up hopelessly involved with a Hollywood starlet.

A/N: Thanks all that are sticking with this one, it picks back up again, I promise!

TW: Sexual Assault, Description of injuries and assault

2.4K Word Count

Ch. 18: If You Wade Around Forever, You Will Surely Drown

The shock of the statement sent you reeling, yet again. He was awake. The man you saw as a father figure was awake, and you weren’t there. Deep down, you knew that he wouldn’t care if you were there or not- what he would care about is that the reason you weren’t there. The guilt of not being there when he came to cause a pit to settle deep in your stomach, as your eyes went misty. 

“Y/N, we did tell him what you had said to me before we left the ER to find you. He also wouldn’t tell us anything, because he feels that it is your story to tell.” Kris continued, seemingly oblivious to your inner turmoil. 

“Smart man,” you whispered, your icy gaze shifting back to Kris. “Because it is true, it’s MY STORY to tell. I get to know all of what happened, I get to decide who knows what, and if it’s important or not.” Her expression dropped, she knew that you were not going to open up about this. 

“This isn’t a moment of weakness, Y/N. This will help you, this will help us understand him, and help us to help Scarlett.” She tried to appeal to your more logical side, but you were not in a logical state of mind at the moment. 

“Waters ISN’T LOGICAL, Kris. He does whatever. He’s a loose fucking cannon, that’s why he isn’t in the Army anymore. ” you fire, turning your gaze away from her to look out the window instead. 

“Now we’re getting somewhere,” was her response. “So I take it that’s how you know each other?” She asks, shifting her position, lifting her left knee over her right leg, so she can rest her hands on top. 

“Yeah. You could say that.”

“So…”

“So what, Kris? He was my CO in the Army. He made my life a living hell there. Now he’s doing it to an innocent woman, and me for payback.”

“Payback for what?”

You thought long and hard about how to phrase this. 

“Blowing the whistle,” Was your quiet response. “I had seen him do some terrible things. I tried to let it be, to not get involved. But he messed up. He hurt someone and sent them to the infirmary. I had no choice but to say something.” It wasn’t a lie, per se, but you had carefully omitted that it was you who was the victim, that it was you who had witnessed everything because he had assaulted you. That your best friends had found you, taken you to the infirmary, and the rape test gave the brass all the evidence they needed. The reason you had to say something was that he had pushed it too far. Had he not pushed it that day- you wouldn’t have had to say a word. You would have been deployed with Nix and Cam. You could have protected them. But his paranoid measures cost two good people their lives. So now, you try to make sure that their sacrifice isn’t in vain. 

“What did he do, Y/N?”

“Aside from his usual berating, he threw a stone ashtray at someone. Knocked them out.” Was your response, again, omitting the important details, like the rape that led up to the whole ashtray Olympics, or that the “them” was you.  

“Mmm. Okay.” She could tell there was more to this, but wasn’t going to push it. “I’m going to let you rest, Y/N. But Chris and Paul want answers. I’ll try to push them off for you. But you can’t put this off forever.” She stood, a worried look on her face.

“Don’t, Kris.”

“Don’t what?”

“Give me that look. That’s exactly why I don’t tell people things.” Her expression shifted from one of pity to one of knowing. 

“Well, Y/N, you better get used to talking. Because that’s all you're going to be doing while you’re in here.” She turned towards the door.

“Kris?” You caused her to stop and look over her shoulder as she waited for you to talk. 

“Did anything happen to Scarlett?” Kris’ shoulders slumped.

“I don’t know yet, Y/N. We sent a larger detail to her house, but that’s all I knew of.” You shook your head in response, returning your gaze to the windows to look outside. Before you knew it, your body willed itself into a restless slumber. 

*****

You could hear faint whispers in the room around you, but couldn’t make out what was being said. It sounded like Kris, but she was talking to someone and you couldn’t tell by the voice who it belonged to. You tried to focus on the conversation, so you could figure out who was in your room without opening your eyes, and possibly alerting them that you were awake. The hushed voices sounded strained, like they were fighting. 

“You shouldn’t. Be. Here.” Kris whisper-shouted at the other person in the room. What caught you off guard was another female voice.

Scarletts voice.

“I will visit whoever I please. Last I checked it isn’t a crime to check on someone.” She muttered.

“Girls, please!” A male voice interjected. Jim. 

“Jim! Her being here will stress her out more! She needs to leave!” Kris whispers and yells at Jim. You weren’t a fan of how Kris acted since this new project began. 

“Scarlett is her client. They have spent a lot of time together since we picked this project up. If Scarlett wants to check on her, let her!”

“Ahem… still in the room, guys!” Scarlett interjects. 

“And, Jim! You just got discharged, you should be at home resting!” Kris continued.

“No. She came to visit me every day while I was in the hospital. I will be here for her. She’s my daughter!” He whisper-shouted back. 

“What?!” Scarlett squeaked, and both Jim and Kris shushed her. “You’re her father?!”

“Not by blood, no. We’ve kind of…adopted each other in times of need.” He whispers. You could hear everyone shuffling around as the door clicked open. 

“Hello everyone,” you heard as it sounded like the doctor shuffled in. “I’m Dr. Roberts.” The door clicked behind him as you heard him walk to the computer across the room. “I need to run some tests and check Y/N’s vitals. Are any of you family?”

“Well, this is my turn to leave,” Scarlett says quietly, gently patting your lower leg as the door clicks open and shut again.

“Finally,” Kris mumbled. 

“Kris. LEAVE.” Jim barked, sick of the blondes antics. He sighed as she shut the door behind her. 

“I take it you are family?” The doctor asked.

“Yeah, stepfather.” He responded. You suddenly felt what you presumed were the doctor’s cold hands through your gown as he gently tapped your shoulder. You jumped at the sudden feeling of someone’s hand that close to your face. 

“Sorry, didn’t want to startle you, Ms. Y/L/N. I need to check on some things before we discuss discharging you.”

“OK.” You responded, a dry smile on your face. He began checking the cut on your face, cutting away the bandage so he could ensure the stitches were clean and dry.

“How do you feel, Y/N?” Jim asked, a concerned expression written on his features. 

“Like I had the shit beat out of me for hours, honestly.” You groan as the doctor leans you back, so he can begin to probe certain areas of your body to check for tenderness. One of the regular nurses comes in, a bashful smile on her face as the doctor pushes on your side, the bruising now making itself apparent. You groan as Jim grimaces for you. 

“Well, Y/N. You do have some bruised ribs, a mild concussion as well as some minor stab wounds that have started to scab,” the doctor started. “Your breathing sounds ok, so no punctured or collapsed lungs. The black eye will disappear; just try not to bend over to pick anything up for a while.” He continued. “The cut to your eyebrow is stitched, healing as nicely as possible with the double scar tissue. Make sure you keep this ointment on it, to minimize the appearance of the scar as it heals.” You nod as he continues. “It’s going to get purple and nasty looking for a little bit, but as long as you keep up with the scar cream, it will reduce and the color will lighten. Do you have any questions?”

“No, I don’t.”

“Good. Now, please wait here, the OB will be coming in here shortly to speak with you.”

“OB?”

“Yes, Y/N. We have an OBGYN assigned to this case since you were attacked. It is standard procedure.” After this, he nodded curtly and swiftly left the room.

“The personality on that one, eh Jim?” You ask, pointing to where the doctor just left. 

“Y/N,” he warned, narrowing his eyes.  You shied away from his gaze.  “Honey, why didn’t you bring someone home with you? You can’t pull a Wonder Woman with this guy.” His gaze softened as he stepped to the side of your bed. “I can’t always be there to protect you, Y/N. And I’ll be dammed if I have to bury another daughter.”

“There wasn’t time, Jim.” You respond, staring down at your hands, fiddling with the wristband to avoid eye contact. A knock on the door brought your gaze back up, and an Amazonian-looking woman in soft pink scrubs walked into the room. 

“Good afternoon, Y/N. My name is Stef,” she spoke softly, a slight accent making itself apparent. She turned to Jim, a bright smile on her face. “You must be?”

“Jim, my name is Jim. I’m Y/N’s stepdad.” She nodded before reaching out to shake his hand. 

“Dad,” you corrected. His smile grew at the correction. 

“Well, Y/N, this is the first time I’ve seen you awake since you got here,” she started. “There are some things I want to check on, and some things I want to go over with you.” You nod, letting her know to continue. “But, for the sake of this exam, I am going to ask Jim to leave, OK?”

“OK.”

“Now, if you want someone in here, we can ask for a third party to be in here. But they need to be female.” You knew you wanted Kris in here, but not if she was going to keep acting up. 

“My assistant, Kris. But I would like to speak with her alone, first.” She nodded, leaving the room with Jim in tote. Shortly after, Kris came back into the room. 

“Jom said you asked for me?”

“Kris, I want you in here while they do my exam.” You say coldly.

“Ok, sure Y/N.” She smiled.

“Under one condition.” Her face dropped. 

“Drop the attitude, Smith.”

“Wha…”

“You know what I mean, Kris. This attitude you have towards Scarlett needs to stop. She is our client, a paying one. And she is going through a lot with this. This ordeal is not her fault. Quit treating her like an inconvenience, and. Play. Nice.” She looked utterly shocked as you called her out on her antics. “Jealousy is not a good look on you, K.”

“I’m not jealous.” She quipped.

“Kris, I was with you for two years. I can tell when you’re jealous. We both agreed when we broke up not to do this.” She looked like a dejected puppy and sat down in the corner chair. “Kris, she’s gonna talk to me about some shit, and it doesn’t leave this room. Understood?” She nods at you her eyes questioning. At this point, Stef walked back into the room.

“OK, are we ready to begin?” You nod at her, a small smile in acknowledgment. She sat in her rolling chair, rolling over to the foot of your bed. Pulling out the stirrups she guided your feet into them. “Now, Y/N. Medically, you were attacked. You were violated in ways that most do not ever have to experience,” she looks at you, as she puts her gloves on. “For that, I truly apologize that someone felt the need to do this to you.” You nod in acknowledgment. “However, this is something that has to be done as a result, to make sure everything is ok,” she continued on. “If at any time, you feel uncomfortable, please let me know.” You gave her one last nod and felt the pinch as the speculum slip inside of you. As you felt the stretch of the tool, you grimaced at the feeling. “I know, this thing is uncomfortable. I’m sorry,” she started. “You do not need to answer if this makes you uncomfortable, but this will help me understand the extent of any damage or injuries that may have occurred,” she continued. “Do you recall what you were penetrated with?” 

You took a moment, allowing yourself to think back to the last time you were in the apartment.  

“Yes, I do.” You speak softly.

“That’s good. Your recall is intact. Are you comfortable with telling me?” You nod, looking at Kris before diverting your gaze to a spot beside her. You were on the fence about seeing her reaction to this. 

“There were multiple occasions,” you begin, seeing the way Kris’s face drops. “But they used their fingers, their fist, and a silencer for a gun.” Even the doctor dropped her facial expression, and sorrow washed over both women’s faces. 

“Is there any way that they could have inseminated you?”

“I suppose, I’m not sure.” She nodded, continuing her probing as she performed the exam.

“Well, Y/N, the blood work doesn’t show any anomalies at the moment, no drugs or alcohol,” she started. “There is some significant tissue damage to the endometrium and cervical canal.” She stood, removing the tool, and setting it on a tray before removing her gloves and throwing them away. “You will likely develop some vaginal scarring as a result. This may or may not result in painful intercourse, as well as more painful periods.”

Nodding, you look up at the doctor, as she comes over to the side of your bed. 

“If you would like, I can give you some OTC contraceptives, in the chance that you may have been inseminated. With it being a week after your assault, it is hard to tell if you are yet. ”

”A week?” You ask, your eyes narrowing at the new information.

“Yes, that’s correct.”

“I’ve been out for a week?”

“Well, not out, necessarily, but your body has been in a recovery mode, of sorts. You’ve been in and out of sleep all week.” Kris said quietly from the corner.

“Shit.”

CHAPTER 19

[safetypinklaus]

title: Afterglow

summary: Costing Seth his match leads to love confessions and more.

warnings: Smut?

You and Seth used to be close but ever since the shield broke up you hated him. You didn't care that Seth was sorry and apologized a thousands times. You also didn't care that your brothers forgave him, because you didn't. You was the first female member of the shield, you considered Roman and Dean your brothers. But Seth and your relationship was always different. You still considered him family at the time, but it was never platonic. You had loved him but now you hate him. Well that's what you tell yourself. Secretly you still love him, but you've decided to cover that up with hostility. You had promised him that every chance you got you would make his life a living hell.

Which brings us to tonight. It was the royal rumble, the men's royal rumble match was currently happening right now. You bided your time until there was only two men left in the ring. Seth Rollins and Edge. Running down towards the ring ignoring the screams of the fans and the referee yelling at you, you quickly slid in the ring staring Seth down. 

"What the hell are you doing here? GET OUT OF THE RING!"

"NO, I promised to make your life a living hell didn't I? What better way to do that than to take your wrestlemania moment away?" She told him. He glared at her but before he can say or do anything, Edge took advantage of the situation and threw him out of the ring. 

"HERE IS YOUR WINNER EDGE." The ring announcer announced. You smirked at Seth who was glaring daggers at you, giving him a little wave as you made your way out of the ring and towards the locker room to grab your stuff and quickly leave to the hotel. 

A few hours have passed and you were dressed in your pajamas in your hotel bed, getting ready to fall asleep when a knock at the door disrupted your peace.

Groaning you got up to go see who was at the door. Chancing a glance at the clock on the wall it read 1am. You signed as you open the door before you saw who it was, you told them. 

"What the hell do you want? It's 1am!."

"Aww did I disturbed your sleep? I'm truly sorry" you could hear the sarcasm in his voice.

"What the fuck do you want Seth?"

"You cost me my wrestlemania moment! You have been making my life miserable for years! Why? I want to fucking know now!"

"Why? Do you feel betrayed? Hurt? Join the fucking club. Now you know how I felt when you stabbed us in the back!"

"That's what this is about? The shields breakup? THAT WAS YEARS AGO! LET IT GO!" His fist clenched at his side as you could see his eyes turned an even darker shade of brown. He always did look hot when he was angry. 

"I'm not gonna let it go! You tore apart the only family I fucking had. You tore apart us! I loved you and you didn't even care."

"You see that's where you are wrong! I love you too. I have apologized countless of times, I have tried to make up for it. The boys forgave me, so why can't you? Or at the very least leave me the hell alone." 

"You love me?." You asked him. You could feel your heartbeat pick up, as you throat got a little dry. Surely you misheard him. He meant loved right? As in past tense.

"Yes, despite what a fucking brat you've been. I still love you." He told you, staring you straight in the eyes. You could see that he wasn't lying. Biting your lip, you knew you would probably regret this. You stepped closer, closing the gap between you two. You stood on your tippy toes as your hands went around his neck to pull him into a kiss. He instantly kissed back, pushing you back into the room and using his foot to close the door. Pulling back to catch your breath, resting your forehead on his. 

"I'm not gonna apologize because you deserve it but I am gonna stop trying to ruin your career." You told him as you pulled back to look into his honey brown eyes. 

"You aren't sorry? Well then. I guess I'm just gonna make you sorry. Strip. Now." He order you as he took a step back to watch you undress. 

It was quiet for a minute as you contemplated on if you should obey his orders. 

"Y/N NOW!" Seth growled out. You quickly took off your clothes, as you stood there naked waiting in anticipation for what is to come.

"You remember your safe word?" He asked you as he walked closer to you grabbing your face to look at him in the eye. 

"Yes, Seth I do. It's Peanut." 

He hummed in acknowledgement. 

"Oh honey, I'm going to ruin you." He told you as he yanked your hair pulling your head back to look at him.

"I want you on your knees. you always had such a pretty mouth, let's see you put it to good use." 

He let go of your hair as you slowly lowered yourself to the floor on your knees. Your heartbeat felt like it was gonna beat out of your chest. You were getting more turned on by the minute. Your hands went to unbuckle his belt and then to unbutton his pants. Your hands moved to pull down his pants and boxers as your mouth went to lick the tip of his shaft. 

He yanked your hair back pulling your head up to look at him. 

"did i give you permission to do that?" Seth asked you coldly. 

"No, but you said-"

"I didn't say you could touch. Perhaps you need a reminder on who's in charge here."

"No, Seth I'm sorry. I'll be good." You promised him. You could see his eye twitch in annoyance. You couldn't tell why until you remember during sex, you aren't allowed to call him Seth unless you are cumming. You are only allowed to call him Sir. 

You bit your lip. "Sir, can I please make you feel good?" 

He looked at you before thinking it over and nodding. 

"Now, you have my permission." He gently guided your mouth to his dick. He stroked it a little before shoving it in your mouth. With his hand still in your hair guiding your head up and down on it. 

"Fuck, I forgot how good your mouth feels baby." He told you as your tongue swirl around his member. You started moving your head up and down his dick faster. You could feel his dick twitch in your mouth.

"I'm gonna cum, and you are gonna be such a good little girl and swallow for me." Taking one of his hands to gently caress your face. You couldn't talk so you tried to nod. Swirling your tongue around his member and using your other hand to play with his balls. He came within seconds. Pulling back from his shaft you swallowed. As you stared up at him waiting for his next instructions. 

"Get on the bed, hands and knees" he commanded you as you stood up to follow his instructions. 

"Yes sir." You answered him as you moved to get on the bed. Hands and knees. Ass up in the air. This was always his favorite position, mostly because he loved to smack your ass. 

Removing what little clothing Seth has left. He walked over to the nightstand where he knew you kept your condoms. Shoving one on his member, he crawled on the bed positioning himself behind you. Using one hand to grab your hip guiding your body to his dick, he used his other to pull your hair back. Giving no warning, he slid right in you.

"Fuck, ow." You groaned out. It hurt a little but you didn't mind. 

His thrust got harder as he slammed in behind you. 

"You gonna regret costing me my match. When I'm done with you, you are gonna be nothing more than a blubbering mess." 

He landed a harsh smack to your right cheek as his thrusts got tougher.

"Seth pleaseee." You begged. You needed to cum, it was getting too much, you wanted a release.

He ignored you, as his hand landed another smack to your left cheek. As he started thrusting faster and faster. 

"I'm gonna cum" you shouted at him as he tugged on your hair harshly.

"If you cum without my permission, I'm gonna give you the well deserved spanking you deserve." 

"Please sir! Can I please cum, sir please" you begged as you could feel tears prick your eyes. You needed to cum.

"aw, it hurts? too bad. you're gonna keep taking it until i'm satisfied." He told you as his thurst started going faster. After a couple seconds he had told you "cum with me beautiful."

You climaxed the minute the words left his mouth. He collapsed right behind you pulling you towards him so your head was on his chest.

"Feel sorry yet?" He asked you a bit breathlessly with a smirk on his face . You looked up at him with a glare, you would've slapped his chest but you were too tired. So you just nodded.

"I love you gorgeous, even if you did cost me my match"

"I'm sorry, we will find another way to get you into the main event of wrestlemaina this year."

"Yeah you will, until then I'll just take my frustrations out on you." He looked at you with a grin on his face as he pressed a kiss to your forehead. Sleep overcame you both soon after. 

(A/N I don't own anyone. Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed :).

[nowayspidey]

⠀ JUDAS | EDDIE BROCK & MALE!READER.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

The last dart almost hit the small hole in the center. You muttered a few curses before heading back to your table at the bar and sipping your cold beer over a big swig while you analyzed what your next shot at the target would look like. You almost choked on surprise when you saw the only failure in your life who had been avoiding you for the past few months. As soon as he saw you, you turned around trying to hide depending on just lowering your gaze but he was already lying down the leather sleeves of his jacket on the table.

- Brock! what a joy to see you. - You said tilting the glass bottle - How did you find me?

- Time to go home (M/r), we have to talk.

You weren't quite drunk so you were aware of the seriousness in Eddie's tone. But you were too proud to play at being the easy person so in the most mature way you refused, taking one last sip of the glass, leaving a bill on the bar, leaving the place.

- Fuck Eddie, stop following me. I can smell your failure from meters away.

You could swear Eddie had whispered a "we're not going to eat him!" But you weren't sure so you kept walking until Brock got ahead of you, stopping your steps.

- Let me explain it and you will understand why I stayed away for a couple of days ...

- MONTHS, BROCK! MONTHS! - You said raising your tone. - We had it all, we could have it all, But you chose to push me out of your apartment and leave my ass dumped.

- That wasn't me I swear!

- Anyway, why don't you go back to your garbage-place and leave me alone? You may be used to failure but I am not.

- Could you stop insulting me and give me a fucking chance to explain things? Then you can drown all your sorrows and miseries in alcohol and I promise i will not stop you (M/r). But let me speak.

For the first time Eddie had left you speechless. You looked sideways looking for his motorcycle until you found it.

- Fine. But I'll drive that beauty.

- Like old times.

After a considered period of time you went back to Eddie's apartment, it was messier than usual, pizza boxes, bags of chocolate on the floor. You sat on the side of the sofa where there was no spring coming out putting a cushion on your lap.

- And well? Speak.

- A lot of things happened these months, but the short story is that a strange alien that turned out to be a symbiote or something like that has merge into my body and now I live with it inside of me. I know it sounds crazy but..---

You started laughing, throwing the cushion on your lap at Eddie's chest. He looked at you with the face of few friends, you got up shrugging your arms.

- That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard, now you conspire with aliens to make your career as a reporter valid and popular? Damn it, Eddie.

- I can prove it. -Eddie took a few steps back stretching his arms, you raised both eyebrows waiting for a result but it only ended with Eddie muttering curses. - Mask!

- Hey, if you wanted to impress me, you don't need to make a fool of yourself. You know I'm that kind of person who can reconcile with just one thing ... - you said mischievously approaching taking Eddie's arms and lowering them. - And that's se..

Before you could finish the word, something emerged from Eddie's back, grabbing you by the waist, throwing you out the window overlooking the alley of the building. Your head was about to hit the ground but the tentacle held you again making the fall just a scare resting your body on the ground.

Eddie leaned out the window finding you in a state of shock. You weren't listening to what seemed to be an argument with himself, you still had the keys of his motorcycle, you run towards it escaping as quickly as possible.

- What the hell did you do? You threw him out the window, you idiot alien! Now you want to show your face -Eddie said annoyed when Venom occupied his body.

- Eddie, chase him. I did you a favor.

[hockeywhy]

4 times you faked a relationship + 1 time you didn’t; m.tkachuk

WARNINGS: language. WORD COUNT: 17.2k. A/N: So, I didn’t want my effort for this fic to go to waste and I’ve decided to re-write it for Matty because he and the fake dating trope work so well together. I had to, so here it is.

one.

“I’d only be asking Matthew if I had no other options and needed a last resort,” you said. “Until then, I’m not even contemplating it.” 

“Kind of sounds like you’ve just about reached the bottom of your list, right around where you’re keeping Matthew, Y/N,” your friend, Anna, responded and though her tone said sympathy, the look on her face reflected anything but sheer elation. 

The invitation landed on your tabletop with a loud slap while you deposited yourself in a nearby chair unceremoniously, glaring at the decorative paper as if it offended you. Actually, scratch that. It did offend you. Greatly so. Honestly, it may as well have come in the form of one of those boxing gloves that sprung out of a box immediately upon opening and decked you square in the face. That’s how much it offended you. 

The golden letters inked on the thick paper warmly requested the pleasure of your company to witness the love of Josh Reynolds to Louise Jones six weeks from now. The location stated was a hotel you knew only through word of mouth: one of those fancy establishments that served ridiculously priced plates that were more canapes than actual meals. 

You doubted there would be much pleasure from your company.

You and Josh called it quits just over a year ago after a relationship that became increasing rockier, significantly more emotionally exhausting. The two of you started dating in high school and if the relationship started off with nothing but the sort of blinding fiery passion only teens could be capable of, well someone missed the memo on giving you the message that all fires eventually fizzle out. Gradually, it was the only way you could see your relationship heading and it seemed that Josh felt it too. It made the breakup easier: it was neat and mutual. Still, that couldn’t be considered an incentive for either of you to invite each other to such grand, deeply personal events. You couldn’t help but feel a little hurt that he found someone he wanted to tie the knot with so quickly but in retrospect, Josh had always wanted that while you were content as you were. That seemed to be the fork in your road with him.

On the one hand, you were angry at Josh for even considering jotting your name down on the list of attendees and on the other, you were angry at yourself for being angry about that. One moment you were dead set on declining the invite and the next, you considering that doing that would simply show you were bitter and unable to be civil about it. Besides, surely it was noted somewhere in the Rulebook of Ex’s that you just couldn’t do stuff like that. That seemed to just about do it. Like hell you’d given anyone the satisfaction of one-upping you.

You needed a plus one. Desperately. 

“Ask your brother then. Pretty sure that’s bound to impress anyone there. It’s not often many will get to say they brushed shoulders with an up-and-coming professional athlete.” 

“I don’t need that sort of plus one. If I did, I would’ve asked you—”

“Thanks,” Anna mumbled.”

“—but what I need,” you ploughed on ahead, “is, well, something that can come off a bit more serious looking.”

She rolled her eyes. “Saying the word boyfriend won’t jinx you into permanent silence, you know. You need a boyfriend.”

“A boyfriend for a day,” you agreed contemplatively. 

She picked up the invitation to look through it carefully and after concluding her inspection, she slapped the papers back down on the table, grinning. “Matthew it will be then!” 

Your younger brother, Jake, recently signed his entry-level contract with the Calgary Flames, in a way carrying forward the family tradition of starting a career in professional sports with them. Your grandfather did, your father did and now, here you were watching your little brother take on the mantle. Your family’s involvement in sport and, specifically, the team meant that you were somewhat familiar with the organization whether that meant attending home games or a few events arranged by the team. You couldn’t say you were the best of friends with them, certainly nowhere near the level your brother was, but generally speaking you were fond of the C of Red. 

That couldn’t also be said about Matthew, however.

It seemed that from the get-go, there was a personality clash between you. At first, you thought it was just Matthew picking on you, joking around as he disagreed with virtually anything you’d say but progressively, you were pretty sure the two of you didn’t even have the compatibility to keep things civil. Matthew had a way with pushing your buttons and it bothered you he could do that with so much ease, though the more you thought of it, the more it shouldn’t have come as a surprise to you: you were all too familiar with his on-ice shenanigans, after all. Whenever you knew you had to be under the same roof as him, you’d tell yourself to not let him get under your skin but that resolve would last for all of ten minutes. Fifteen if you had a particularly good day. 

Much to your chagrin, it seemed your brother was closest to Matthew. Though you offered the spare room in your apartment, your brother was so warmly welcomed by Matthew. It was no doubt even Jake found your annoyance with his teammate entertaining.

The thought alone was frustrating enough. If one day, by chance, you caught sight of a white strand of hair on your head, you were dead set on blaming Matthew for it. Matthew and his smarmy attitude; Matthew and his smartass retorts; Matthew and the smirks he threw your way whenever your brother took his side, outnumbering you. 

You clenched your teeth, glaring at the invite. From the corner of your eye, you saw Anna’s outstretched hand holding your phone out to you. A groan formed in your throat and you wished you kept in contact with the handful of guys you tried dating after Josh. None really stayed. Or better said, none managed to draw you in. It was as if Josh had put a jinx on you. If that was the case, you hoped that this whammy would disappear if it meant watching him watch someone else walk down the aisle towards him. 

Anna waved the device at you insistently. “Do it. Come on. Even you know nothing says fuck you like turning up there with Matthew. Scrappy when he wants to be and he’s not bad to look at either. You know it.” 

You arched an eyebrow up at her. “More than Johnny?” 

She flushed visibly. Johnny and Anna were still a relatively new thing, dancing around their relationship carefully as if they were both doing this rodeo for the first time. It was pretty cute. “Don’t change the subject.” She placed the device down on the table in front of you then patted your shoulder. “I have a feeling you won’t regret it. If he gets on your nerves too much, well…it can’t be worse than watching your ex get married, right?” 

“Ouch,” you winced, but chuckled, knowing you were defeated. Matthew was the last resort, and you knew you were at the bottom of your list before you even started going through it. “You do realize if he declines, I’ll probably make a start on packing my bags and moving to Montana, right? The only time you’ll hear from me is when my handwritten letter goes through the nine circles of hell that is our postal service.” 

Anna fixed you with a stare that could only read as ‘do it’. “I wouldn’t be so insistent on this if I knew Matthew would say no. I have a feeling he’ll surprise you.” 

With a heavy sigh, you unlocked your phone and scrolled through your list of contacts, thumb hovering over his name when it came up. Anna wasn’t wrong: Matthew wasn’t bad to look at all, that much you could admit. But god, if he turned you down…. you knew you wouldn’t be able to ever show your face in front of him or the rest of the team ever again. 

“I think I’ve had enough surprises from him to last a lifetime,” you mumbled but tapped the call symbol anyway.

He answered on the third ring. “Hel—

You didn’t let him finish. “I need your help,” you ground out, eyes closing while you rubbed at your forehead with the tips of your fingers. 

There was silence on the other end of the line that had you biting your lip in anxiousness. You shouldn’t have done this. You really shouldn’t have done this. All it would take would be just hitting the ‘resume my account’ link on one of the dating apps you signed up for a while ago. Someone was bound to be attracted not only to you but the promise of an open bar—

“Music to my ears,” Matthew’s response came through. You could practically hear the smile in his voice and knew you’d regret it; you could easily tell from the tone of his voice. 

You sighed quietly, leaning forward to rest your elbows on the table, eyes glued to the invitation. Fuck it, you could get someone else; easily, no doubt. The world of online dating was vast and there would always be takers.

“Uh, yeah actually, never mind—”

“No, no. Come on, Y/N. Pretty sure this is the first time you’re calling me first so can we take a moment to just let that sink in?” Silence again, then a chuckle. “Okay, now that we did. How can I help you?” 

It wasn’t as if Josh had put you in the position to ask Matthew for a favor but still: fuck Josh, anyway. In a split second of sheer pettiness, you considered aiming to host the most extravagant, unforgettable weddings when your turn would come just to show him who does it better. 

“Are you free the third weekend in June?” you asked tiredly. 

“Don’t know. Depends what for and who you’re asking for.” 

You should’ve asked him face-to-face. At least then, he would’ve had the chance to see you roll your eyes, turn on your heel and walk away. “I’m obviously asking for myself. Could you just be straightforward for once and answer yes or no? You’re making me hold the line for longer than I anticipated and I’m happy to ask someone else,” you lied.

“Let me get this right—” Here comes, you thought exhausted. “You’re calling me for the first time since you have my number to ask me if I’m free the third weekend in June? As a favor for yourself.” 

“Matthew, I didn’t stutter—”

“What’s happening in June?”

You don’t know what it was about his words that downed you. It was nothing but a simple question yet the only thing you could think of was: the first boy I’ve dated and so far, the only one, seems to have moved on quicker than I anticipated and while I’m still trying to build myself back up, I’m sitting in my kitchen looking at a wedding invitation and wallowing in self-pity because regardless of how hard I try, of how much I’ve amended my standards, no one seems to do it so what if this is it for me? What if this is just the way it’ll be from now on? And now, I’m resorting to lying just to make myself feel better but also put a façade in front of someone who I know no longer cares about me like that. And really, nor do I about him but here we are. So, nothing much is happening in June, Matthew. Hopefully we get a lot more sunshine though!

What you responded with instead was, “just an old friend of mine getting married and I need a plus one. Nothing serious. Just go there for an hour or two, say some hellos and leave. It’s a quick in-and-out thing.” 

More silence on the other end of the line other than the muffled shuffle of what sounded like bedsheets. “Why not ask your brother then?” 

“Asked him already, said he’s got something lined up already. So, are you free or not?” you lied, quickly pressing on even if you knew that sounded a lot like desperation.

“For you, at a price.” He was smirking. You knew he was and more than ever, you wished 2021 was the year you could just reach through the phone and shake the person on the other end. 

“Uh-huh. Right. No, just forget it. Forget I even—”

You were going to end the call when Matthew laughed, quickly calling out a “no, no! Nothing weird, I promise. Just owe me a favor in return, is all.” 

“Do I get a choice?” you mumbled, more to yourself than towards him.

“I think we both know that you don’t. Text me the time and place,” he instructed and then, just as you were really about to end the call, he added, “hey, send me a photo of what you’re wearing also. I’ll match my tie to your dress, free of charge.” 

“Can you maybe ditch the jacket while you’re at it? Just want to make sure your tie’s within reach so I can strangle you with it.”

Even after you cut the call, Matthew’s laughter rang in your ears. 

-

Matthew matched his tie to your red dress. The color of the silk around his neck was so striking, you would swear it was made from the same material as your outfit. You sent him a photo of the material of the dress, more as a joke than having any expectations attached to it so you were pleasantly surprised to see he made the effort. For a moment, you allowed yourself to bask in sheer joy knowing that to any eye, the two of you could easily pass as a couple. At least, from looks alone if not from attitude. You were a proud person; fiercely so. Knowing you were now in debt to Matthew however he saw fit dealt a pretty impressive blow to your ego. You don’t let yourself linger too much on that thought, though. It was already difficult enough to loosen up and relax your stance as you climbed into Matthew’s car as soon as he texted you of his arrival. 

“You look good,” he commented after you fixed the seatbelt on. He turned in his seat as much as space would allow so he could look at you properly and in return, you arched an eyebrow, refusing to give way to his stare. “Are you trying to one-up the bride?” 

“Ha, ha. Funny. You didn’t even see the bride. I didn’t even see the bride.” 

“Didn’t see her but I’m seeing you, so,” he shrugged, by way of explanation before correcting his position. 

If asked, you wouldn’t deny that Matthew also looked good. Very good. But only if asked. It was impossible that someone with a face like that didn’t know they turned heads easily wherever they went. Matthew’s suit fit him as if it was sown on him. If the two of you had a better relationship, you would even dare ask him what it was he was putting in that hair of his that made it so shiny and gave those curls so much definition, taming them almost perfectly when he really put his mind to it. Whatever it was, you had a feeling he didn’t strain as much as you had earlier that morning to tame your hair and though you could give yourself credit for how well it turned out, your arms weren’t thanking you for it. 

Thankfully, much of the drive was pleasant. Though you hated small talk, you decided to make an effort if only to ease your nerves as the navigation system indicated you were drawing closer and closer to that glitzy hotel. You learned that although the season was over, Matthew, Brady and the rest of the family would spend a few weeks in Canada before heading back home to St. Louis. In turn, you told him that some of the days off you booked from work would be spent somewhere just as sunny and warm but with more beaches. It was safe ground. That, you could do although progressively, you were becoming more and more distracted, and less focused on the conversation the two of you managed to keep. 

“Want me to pull over?” Matthew asked suddenly. 

“What,” you mumbled, turning your attention from the road ahead to Matthew who seemed amused by the situation. “Why would I want you to do that?” 

“I’d want you to do that. You look pretty pale and honestly, I’ve just had the interior cleaned so—”

“Fuck you, Tkachuk, keep driving. I’m just a little…cold. How high do you have the AC on?” 

He fixed you with a stare while waiting for the lights ahead to turn green, eyebrow arched. “It’s June, Y/N, and uncomfortably warm. If it makes you feel better, though, I could turn it off and we can roll down the windows instead?”

“No, sorry—you’re right. It’s fine. Just leave the AC as it is.” 

The laugh he gave was nothing short of incredulous. “Repeat that back for me. Actually—hold on, do that when I can press record on my phone so I can have that on repeat. Did you admit I’m right?” 

“God, you’re making me regret inviting you,” you muttered though without heat. 

An uncomfortable silence slipped between the two of you or maybe, it was just your perspective on it. Matthew seemed perfectly at ease minding the road, only occasionally throwing a cursory glance towards the car’s navigation system whenever it announced a turn. Doing this seemed more and more like a bad idea. A terrible one. No one would’ve held it against you if you denied the invitation. In fact, you thought that was more expected than accepting it and turning up to the party as if you were seeing an old friend, not an ex-boyfriend. It wasn’t too late though. Matthew could still turn the car around. 

“Listen, Matt—”

“You have now reached your destination. Your destination is on the right.”

You released a breath you weren’t even aware of holding, then threw a quick look towards the main entrance of the hotel. Already, a few guests whom you recognized were crossing into the lobby.

“You really don’t look okay at all,” Matthew repeated and there was less humor in his voice and more concern this time around. Even you weren’t ignorant to how much your mood kept fluctuating over the course of the drive: often, engaged in conversation but occasionally, withdrawn, barely just catching on to whatever it was Matthew was saying. Sure, he probably didn’t know you well enough to read you, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out something was amiss. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but I felt like there’s more to this thing than you’re telling me. You could’ve asked your brother, yet you didn’t—” 

Damn it. You made him swear to play along. You made a quick mental note to get back at him about it whenever you felt energized enough to do so.

“Matthew,” you said, your voice suddenly clear, tone neutral. You didn’t dare look him in the eyes so instead, you kept your stare fixed on the revolving doors ahead. “I’m only going to say this once and I hope that you won’t make me repeat it now or ever again. I’d prefer that you don’t mention it to anyone either. The person getting married today is my ex-boyfriend. Up until last year, we’ve been together since we were teenagers. I loved him. Since we broke up, I kept trying to look for parts of him in others, but I couldn’t find even a trace of who he was. I feel as I’ve been jinxed, and I felt that maybe if I come today, maybe if I see him with someone else, I can confidently say I’m fine with that. It hurt my pride when I received the invitation, so my first thought was to lie. If, for just a few hours, I can pretend I’ve also moved on and I’m not stuck in this…fucking weird limbo, then maybe it becomes true. A fucked up self-prophecy. So.” You pause, clearing your throat. Your mouth suddenly felt dry from your speech, yet you couldn’t feel a pang of regret in your chest or heat behind your eyes. “So. If you want out, that’s fine. After all, I’m asking you to pretend to be my date out of spite, I guess. And embarrassment. It’s childish and unfair and ridiculous but—”

You came to a halt when you felt a finger under your chin, and a gentle upward push forced you to raise your head up a little more. When you turned towards Matthew, you looked at him with a look of confusion on your face. 

“Keep your head up. We have a wedding to go to.” 

His encouragement sunk in faster than expected and as your expression relaxed, a smile formed on your face. 

Yeah. The two of you had a wedding to go to. 

-

The event hall was decorated minimally yet tastefully. It made everything seem even more personal and you received that impression from every detail: from the flower arrangements to the music, everything was a testament to a life united by love. Maybe your emotional outburst earlier accounted for it, but you felt lighter even as you watched the newlyweds glide along the floor for their first dance. Sure, you felt a desperate pang of want but it was distant. Muffled. 

Despite your initial thoughts, having Matthew at your side felt very much like a safety cushion. It surprised you to watch him settle into his role with so much ease that eventually, even you didn’t have to remind yourself to not withdraw whenever his arm wrapped around your waist: sometimes loosely, sometimes a little tighter, reeling you in closer.

Fish, here is your bait, you thought wildly as you stood tucked at his side while he accepted flatteries from one of the guests who swore had been a fan of the Calgary Flames since before he could even talk.

“You must be so proud,” the man turned towards you. “Your family’s truly one of a kind to have all played for the team and now—” He gestures towards Matthew as if to say all of this. “Must be something about those Flames!” 

You laughed tightly, just as Matthew squeezed your side. By that move alone, you could tell he was eating this up. 

“Yeah, just can’t get enough of them,” you concluded, pitching your voice just a little higher towards the end. To the man, it was as genuine as could be, but Matthew cautioned you silently with the slightest narrowing of his eyes, effectively warning you to be more realistic. “Hey, I’ll get us some refills? Try to be a little more inconspicuous in the meantime. Remember this isn’t your day,” you joked. 

“Only practicing for when our turn comes,” Matthew responded without missing a beat and released the hold he had on you. 

Once at the bar, you allowed yourself some extra moments to catch your breath. Even off ice, Matthew was a force to be reckoned with. He struck conversation with others easily, drew their attention with seemingly little effort and easily set the mood for whatever situation or person the two of you would run into. A part of you thought his profession had a lot to do with his mannerism, but a bigger part knew different:  mostly, it was really just Matthew. 

He had a way with words and with people that you haven’t been witness to before and couldn’t help but wonder if it was all show. He was, after all, a face for the public: familiar with interviews, familiar with the attention, apparently not overwhelmed even by less conventional questions. Watching him play this role was fascinating to say the least. It certainly took your mind off the circumstances so credit where credit was due. 

“Hey, it’s good to see you here.” 

You turned from the bar and came face to face with Josh. His jacket was off, and his sleeves were neatly rolled up past his elbows; behind the knot of his tie, you could see he’d undone the top button of the collar. You’d seen him make countless rounds across the entire floor, greeting guests and ensuring everything was running smoothly. Occasionally, you watched him dance either with his wife, or family members, or even guests you recognized as work colleagues. 

You smiled. “Thanks for the invite. It was a bit weird to receive it, I can’t lie about that, but I’m glad you sent it.” It surprised you to learn you weren’t even lying about that. Through the course of the evening, it dawned on you that maybe, it was more the thought of being here that made you anxious; the event itself, however, proved just how right you were. It felt…fine. You felt fine. 

“Yeah—uh, I wasn’t… I wasn’t really sure but, well, before…” He trailed off into a sigh. 

You chuckled softly. “Would you like to buy a vowel?” 

That made him laugh. Truly, genuinely laugh. “Sorry. I guess it’s a bit weird for me also. But, well, before you and I were, well, you-and-I, we were friends. I would’ve hoped we’d still be friends even after…” He waved a hand in the air by way of explanation but that was sufficient for you.

“Won’t hurt to be friends. Whatever happened between us—well. Thing of the past. Build bridges and get over them, right?” 

“Right. Function of a bridge and all.”

“Hey. Congratulations, by the way! I’m happy for you. Really. I wish the two of you all the best. She seems really great.” 

“She is,” he agreed and cast a glance towards the room, eyes undoubtedly searching for her. “Are you—”

“Here you are.” 

Saved by the bell. A weight fell around your waist that, by now, was warm and familiar. Unconsciously, you leaned into Matthew, flashing a wide smile at Josh. At first, he seemed surprised by the sudden appearance but then his features settled into something more comfortable; something so much like relief that for a moment, you wished you could just come clean about it. You and Matthew were less than meets the eye.

Before you could even introduce them, a kiss was pressed to your cheek, knocking all air from your lungs and almost making you choke because of it.

What the hell.

“You were gone for some time, so I thought to check on you,” Matthew informed you, all matter of fact. To Josh, he said, “congratulations on the wedding. Must be pretty great to finally get to this point. You two look great together.” 

“Oh? Yeah. Yeah, thanks man. So glad you could come along today.” Josh turned to you, an eyebrow perked in interest. “I didn’t know you two were together.” 

“Oh we’re just—” 

You began but were promptly interrupted by Matthew. “We like to keep it lowkey. It hasn’t been that long for us but that’s not much of a problem when your gut tells you this is it. You know it well, right?”  

You were entirely caught off guard. Instead of responding immediately, you bought yourself some time by taking a sip from your glass of—whatever it was. Strong though. Just perfect for the situation you suddenly found yourself in: ex-boyfriend ahead, fake boyfriend to the side, promising sweet nothings that you knew would come back to haunt you at some ungodly hour. You wished you could step on his shoe; pull on those shiny curls of his real quick, knock some sense back into him. There was a difference between play a role well and clearly, playing it too well.

Matthew pushed ahead. “It’s pretty good timing for us though. We could take some notes for when our turn comes, right babe?” 

“I’ll let the two of you to it, then. Thanks again for coming.” Josh made a move to step away but before he did, he turned to you and caught your eyes. “I’m really happy for you, Y/N. You look good together. Just make sure you don’t take too many notes.”

“Wouldn’t dream to,” Matthew responded, and you could read the slight bite in his words. When Josh was out of earshot, he looked down at you. “You dated him? Just him?” 

“Hey, what’d I say about not bringing that up again? And save your dick measuring contests for the locker room, Tkachuk. Now’s not the time nor place.” 

“Now’s definitely the time and place,” he countered, making you roll your eyes but there was a smile on your face you couldn’t quite wipe off. “Come on. Let’s continue taking leaves out of their book.” In one swift motion, he took the glass from your hand and set it on the bar while above, the LED lights dimmed, and the playlist switched to a slower song. 

You threw him a cautious look, easily reading where that was going. “I’m not dancing.”

“Sure, you are. You want to give the impression of being happily in love? You need to start pulling your weight in this thing.” 

“Oh, I’m sorry, Atlas. Do your shoulders hurt from carrying the burden of our relationship?” you mocked, yet still allowed him to lead you towards the dance floor. Right in the center of it given the bride and groom appeared to sit this one out; you expected nothing less from him. You weren’t even surprised when he made an entire show out of it, forcing you to do a pirouette when the two of you claimed your spot. 

“You can’t even imagine the pain you put me through,” he sighed near your ear as the two of you began swaying to the music. 

“Well, you’re still standing so clearly it can’t be that bad.” 

“Baby, it’s torture.” 

You were grateful the two of you weren’t exactly face to face or you were sure Matthew would never have let you live down the flush you felt rising to your cheeks. Sure, he didn’t use the pet name in a genuine manner, but just hearing it roll off his tongue like that… You stopped that thought before it grew into a whole new different monster. 

After a few moments of silence passed, Matthew lowered his head closer to yours, his warm breath colliding with the skin on your throat. “Do you think now’s the right time to kiss? Are enough people watching?” 

You stepped on his foot. Not hard, but just with the right amount of pressure to draw a wince from him. Satisfied, you leaned back just a little to look at him properly. “Don’t even think about it, Tkachuk—”

“Thought about it already.”

Through clenched teeth, you hissed, “you. Are. Incorrigible.” 

He raised his eyebrows, surprised. “If only you could meet yourself.” 

You snickered quietly then leaned back against him. “Thanks for doing this. I know it’s not the most convenient of things… and it wasn’t fair to tell you the full truth of it right on the day of. But—well, thanks.”

“That sounds like it was pretty difficult to let out. It’s very…. heartfelt.” 

“Just fucking accept it as I gave it to you, Tkachuk,” you complained, more amused than annoyed.

More silence followed, filled in only by the general buzz of the room and the slow melody. “And now?” Matthew questioned a short while later. You allowed an extended silence to fill in for your confusion. He picked up on it within seconds. “Do you still feel jinxed? Stuck in the same place while he goes on ahead in life?” 

You took some time to think through your answer, time during which the song faded into yet another slow one. Matthew didn’t give an indication of wanting to move away from the dancefloor, so you saw no purpose in you doing that. 

“Not really,” you concluded. “Just seems like we’re both following different trajectories. Doesn’t mean I’m left behind if I’ve not yet met someone to settle down with like he did. Maybe I just need to be here to come to terms with it. Good for him though. I’m genuinely happy for him and his wife. I think lots of people imagine going through this very same moment.” You ended with a shrug but then, to lighten up the moment, you added, “don’t mock me for it. Between the two of us, I’m the one with the pointy shoes.” 

Matthew laughed, a low, pleasant laugh right by your ear. “I’ll give you a free pass for what’s left of today.” 

“Your generosity astounds me. Please could you also sign my jersey?” 

“Is it my jersey?” 

“Why would it be your jersey when I have my last name printed out on one at the expense of my brother being roughed up a little?” 

“Don’t tempt me. That favor you now owe me? I might just use it to have you get my jersey so I can sign it since you so generously asked.” 

“Your call,” you shrugged. “Just know it’s going straight in the wash right after you scribble on it.” 

Matthew took a few small steps back, only to pull you back towards him. You played along and spun as you landed into his hold once again.

“You say that now, but when you’ll see yourself with it—”

“I’ll auction it on eBay.” 

The laugh you got out of Matthew stayed with you through the rest of the night and like never before, his good disposition easily transferred to you.

two.

When the elevator doors slid open, your brother and Johnny weren’t the only ones to step into the hotel lobby. Matthew accompanied them, flashing a smug smile as the trio approached and his eyes landed on you. You cast a quizzical glance from your brother, to Johnny, to Matthew and then looked towards Anna as if to ask are you seeing this? She only shrugged at you in silent response, though she was grinning from ear to ear. At least someone was certainly enjoying this.

“Last I remember, there were only two of you,” you commented.

“Was that before or after your third drink?” your brother chirped back.

Instead of humoring him, you shift your gaze to Matthew. “What gives, Tkachuk? Can’t be left at home unsupervised during family vacations?” 

“My house training has only gone so far,” he responded smartly, then nodded his head towards Anna and Johnny who were caught in a half-hug, apparently entertaining by watching you and Matthew bicker as if watching a tennis match. “They’re not family.” 

Anna feigned a gasp on your behalf. “Y/N and I are part and parcel, Matt. Thought you’d know that by now.” 

“Well, the three of us are part and parcel also, Anna. Thought you’d definitely know that by now,” he responded but you were already leading the way out of the hotel lobby and towards the busy square outside.

It was a hub of activity: from street vendors to dance and music performers, there was something to see regardless of which way you looked. Although you arrived at your holiday destination the previous day, the flight south coupled with the warm, sticky evening made you want to steer away from the busier parts of the town. Instead, you opted to lounge by the pool with Anna, having perhaps one too many cocktails to kickstart your vacation. Perhaps you missed Matthew’s arrival at some point then, though for the life of you, you couldn’t remember anyone mentioning he’d come along also. Not that it bothered you greatly.

Since the time you asked him to be your plus one some few weeks ago, the relationship between the two of you warmed slightly. Sure, he still knew which buttons to press to get a reaction out of you, but you saw it as being less ill-intended and more good-natured fun. You kept up with him easily and whenever it felt as if he was cornering you, you conceded with a roll of your eyes but never admitted defeat. You didn’t consider the two of you friends, but something changed on the day of the wedding right around the time you had spilled out your feelings about the entire deal to him. Looking back on it, you found it strange just how easily you did that, no second thoughts, no wishing for takebacks. You knew you owed him the truth given the position you put him in without plenty of heads-up, but you could’ve easily just simplified the entire thing. 

It wasn’t difficult to stick together as a group but eventually, you wandered off towards a few stalls on your own that have caught your eye. Though you wanted some more time to have Anna to yourself, it was technically her first vacation with Johnny. You could catch up with her later in the room; surely, she’d have even more swooning to do over him by then. Not that you blamed her. Johnny was an incredible guy. 

First, you stopped at a stall selling a range of baked goods that you simply couldn’t turn away from. And for good reason: the sour cherry churro you settled for was a dream come true. From there, you strolled towards a few small stores selling a range of products ranging from colorful graphic tees to earrings made from vibrant, colorful gemstones. You held a blue pair next to your ear, turning one way then another to watch as the light reflected off the gleaming gem. 

“Those suit your complexion,” the attendant commented and when you looked towards him, he smiled bashfully. 

A gentle heat crept up your neck, unable to keep the grin off your face but you couldn’t look away from him: his skin was lightly tanned, and a dusting of freckles covered the bridge of his nose and upper cheeks. His blond hair was messy in a way you could easily tell was styled to appear as such. He was cute in a sort of conventional way, but you liked the way he smiled at you, all shy but certainly genuine.

“Funny you say that. I always had a feeling blue was my color,” you responded, and his smile widened. 

“Here for vacation?” he asked. 

You nodded. “Yeah, I just got here yesterday, and I’ll be around for a few days,” you added, a little hopeful. 

Hey, if you could score some good company while in the area, then you weren’t going to turn down the opportunity to flirt a little and make good with someone more local.

“Good. That’s really good to know.” He regarded you for a moment and you were certain that caused your blush to deepen though at the same time, it made you feel a little…exposed. “Hey, are you free—”

“The red ones are nicer.” 

You squeezed your eyes shut, frustration quickly replacing the feeling of near euphoria. You could recognize that voice anywhere. Of all times he could have run into you, the universe fixed it so he popped up when you least needed that to happen. 

“I prefer the blue,” you countered, then held them up against your ear again though you knew you didn’t need to double check if they suited you. 

“No, trust me with the red,” Matthew insisted, and you saw him appear behind you in the small circular mirror you were looking into. He was so close. “Goes well with that little number I got you the other day.” 

You sputtered. “W-what?! Stop messing—”

In the mirror Matthew’s eyes flicked from you to the attendant. “Yeah, you know the one. I left the box on the bed in our room, thought to surprise—”

“Tkachuk, just shut up. There isn’t an our room—”

This was so painfully uncomfortable. So frustratingly annoying, you felt the blood warm in your veins, that familiar wave of anger coursing through your body.

“I’ll ring those up for you,” the attendant said, his voice carefully polite while he accepted the red earrings from Matthew’s outstretched hand. 

You hated him. Passionately hated him. It was easy for Matthew to play games like those because he could easily get just about anyone, but you? It wasn’t quite as easy to not be a pro-athlete who had pretty much everything lined up and going for them. You tried catching the store attendant’s eyes again but he was busy accepting the cash from Matthew after packing away the earrings in a small paper bag. You knew he wouldn’t catch sight of it, but it didn’t stop you from casting a longing, apologetic glance towards him before leaving the store. 

It felt as if for every two steps you took, Matthew only needed one and despite the crowds, he caught up with you easily, holding out the bag towards you while you powered ahead. 

“Come on, don’t be mad. The red ones are definitely better than the blue ones,” Matthew tried to reason with you while holding the hand stretched out to you, insistent on his offer. When you didn’t respond and instead, tried to rush further ahead, Matthew pressed on. Him managing to keep up with your pace only added fuel to the fire. “Don’t tell me you’re upset over Ron Jon back there.” 

You came to a halt, turning to glare up at him. “I am, Matthew. You didn’t need to do what you did back there. There was no reason for it. It was shitty of you, and I need you to back off while I try to enjoy the rest of my night.” You clenched your jaw, trying to suppress the overwhelming feeling of anger that normally resulted in tears. “You could at least pretend to be sorry about it.” 

With that, you turned on your heel and squeezed your way through the crowds, ignoring Matthew’s calls to stop and come back and that he was only joking. 

Too late for that, you thought bitterly, making a turn towards a street popular for its dining and bar venues. 

-

The part of the archipelago more popular with tourists was truly a sight to behold as the sun went down, coloring the sky in some of the warmest, most calming shades of orange, red and yellow you ever saw. It seemed as if everyone gathered on the promenade, phones at the ready while taking photos of the sky, selfies and group shots. Even you couldn’t resist it and after taking a few well-centered selfies, a passing couple offered to take your photo which you immediately posed for. 

Later, once the sight sunk in, you moved towards a nearby bar, first attracted by the pink, purple and blue neon lights and then, the music. A good cocktail, good music and a gorgeous sunset were all it took for you to feel more relaxed, leaving behind the event from earlier. He wouldn’t be the first cute guy you’d see, nor the last and indeed, it was easy for you to settle in the more crowded area of the locale where people were dancing either solo, with a partner or as part of a group.

Not long after you weaved your way onto the dancefloor, you felt a pair of hands settle on your hips, drawing you in. You went easily, accepting the embrace, accepting the way you were being led into the dance, swaying your hips along with his. You didn’t even miss a beat when he spun you around, but you kept your hands pressed against his shoulders, rather than wrapping your arms around his neck. You were tipsy, no doubt, and admittedly felt touch-starved but you weren’t quite in the mood for anything more. You even dodged his mouth when he tipped his head down to your lips so instead, he landed a kiss on your cheek. Still, he was pretty relentless. The dance took a turn that was significantly more sensual, crossing a line into discomfort, and you felt that was your cue to try and remove yourself from him. It was easy initially. You threw him a small smile and when he caught hold of your hand, you simply motioned you were only going to get a drink, hoping that would keep him where he was with the knowledge you would return. 

When you finally pulled away, you made a bee line towards the exit of the venue but again, you were a step too slow. The guy caught you just at the door.

“Where are you running off to, pretty?” he slurred, his voice louder above the thumping of the music. 

“Oh—Um, just getting a breath of fresh air, is all,” you said quickly and immediately wished you didn’t venture off in a place like this alone. It was as if you suddenly forgot everything that was common sense, pushed towards it by earlier frustration. 

“Doesn’t look like it to me.” He frowned, but there was no clarity in his eyes. He was entirely out of it and his fingers squeezed painfully around your wrist. You flinched visibly, squirming under his touch and even if you tried pulling your arm away, it was useless. He overpowered you even through the drunken haze. “Wanna go? Fine, then let’s go together.” 

“No—uh, I’m actually here with my friends. I’ve just—I saw them so I’m going to catch up with them. They must be looking for—”

“Then we can go to them together, sweetheart. Here, point them out to me.”

“No, really. I’m going to them alone,” you emphasized and put all your force into trying to free your hand. It may have taken him by surprise that led to his loosened grip, but as soon as you turned on your heel, you found out there was more to it than just that.

You almost faceplanted right into Matthew’s chest when you tried making a run for it. He stood there, eyes flicking between you and the guy with an unreadable expression on his face. Your heart was hammering wildly in your chest and instinctively, you almost glued yourself to his side. It wasn’t the first time someone tried to force a move on you, but it was the first time it was done so in such a thoughtless, drunken manner. Perhaps your fear was also enhanced by being alone in an unfamiliar place. To see Matthew this time felt like a blessing.

“Babe,” Matthew said by way of greeting, pulling you to him when he wrapped an arm around your shoulders. 

You didn’t realize you were trembling until you stood so close to him, legs suddenly feeling like jelly in front of your salvation. Matthew could easily overpower the guy; even if they were roughly the same height, there was a big difference between the body of an athlete and the swaying one of a drunk guy. Still, it didn’t mean you wanted Matthew to get caught up in anything he’d later regret or would affect him in any way, so you pressed a hand to his chest trying to put some pressure into guiding him away from the scene.

“She yours?” the drunk guy slurred, head tilting back, chin pointing towards your general direction.

“Yeah. So, guess that makes the situation even worse for you,” Matthew responded. His tone was light, seemingly non-threatening to someone who didn’t know him but you did. You knew him and you could read him crystal clear in this moment. 

“Matthew, please,” you muttered, looking at him almost desperately while trying to put all your body weight into guiding him away. 

The guy scoffed. “You’ve gotta do better than that, buddy.” He snickered. “You’ve gotta keep ‘em on a tighter leash unless you want them to go—”

Matthew made a move towards him, but you quickly stepped in front of him, essentially forcing him to halt. “Matt, please. Let’s go, okay? Please. I really want to leave. Right now.” 

He glared at the guy for a moment longer but the hard look in his eyes softened as soon as his gaze fell on you. You took the liberty of placing most of your weight against Matthew, allowing him to remove both of you from the situation and towards a less crowded area. That was easy to find: with the sun having long set, most of the crowds cleared away from the promenade so there was plenty of space for you to collect yourself in peace. 

He didn’t pry into the situation, didn’t even make any smartass comments. Instead, he let you slip away from under the safety of his arm while you pace around a small area, trying to work off the anxiety as much as you could. You had to count your breaths, remind yourself to breathe in then out slowly. You were okay. You were far from that guy, and he couldn’t hurt you. At least, no more than he already did. Your wrist felt a bit sore, but you’d take that over anything worse. 

“You okay?” Matthew asked at last, tone careful. “I can go back there and pull him out, you know, get him to apologize.”

“No!” you said loudly, desperately, then cleared your throat and lowered your voice. “No, don’t go. Please. I just need a moment, that’s all. Just a little. Could you not leave? I’ll be fine in a moment. Just—just need to catch my breath—"

“Hey, hey—relax. It’s over. He can’t put a hand down on you now, or ever.” Matthew took a few steps closer to you as if apprehensive to approach you in the first place. You knew what you must’ve looked like: pale, still shaken by what happened. He held a hand towards you, palm up. “Can I touch you?” 

You looked from it to his face, then said, “don’t get any funny ideas,” but it lacked your usual punch. You took his hand though, letting yourself be drawn to him. Matthew smelled like the sea. You couldn’t help but wonder if maybe he’d gone down to the beach earlier to take a dip. You wished you did that rather than try and drink your frustration over missing out on a random guy. God, you could sleep right here if sleeping while standing was a thing. “I’m sorry for reacting the way I did before—with, uh—what did you call him?” 

Matthew chuckled, a low, deep chuckle. “Ron Jon.” 

“You’re awful, Tkachuk.”

“And you have a funny way of expressing gratitude.” 

“Sorry—”

He laughed louder. “I’m messing with you.” A pause, and then, “I’m sorry I rained on your parade earlier with the guy back then. If you really liked him…” He trailed off, as if to let you fill in the sentence for him.

You laughed weakly, waving a hand dismissively. “Thanks. Again. Seems like nowadays, I just keep having to thank you for one thing or the other.” 

You felt him shrug. “Fine by me. You keep adding to these favors you owe me.” 

“It’s only one. Well. Two if you want to be a dick and count this one too.” 

You took a step back, detaching yourself from him to run both hands through your hair. You felt exhausted, drained of energy yet relieved. Who would’ve thought you’d be pleased to see Matthew pull another one of his appearing out of the blue acts?

“You give me no other choice but to be one,” he joked. “Come on, let’s go back to the hotel. Everyone’s wondering where you were, so you kind of lost your right to vote on dinner for tonight.” 

You sighed heavily. “Let me guess: you all ganged up on me in my absence and settled on lobster?” 

Matthew grinned. “Can’t vacation in a seaside town and skip out on that.” 

“Ugh. Sea critters.” You pulled a face, drawing yet another laugh from Matthew. It made you feel oddly accomplished but you cut that train of thought there, forcing it to derail elsewhere, to place more familiar to you, more comfortable. “Matthew, I mean it when I said thank you. That was—it was scary,” you admitted as the two of you started walking back towards the hotel. You pulled your wrist into your hand, rubbing at the skin gently. Focused on the road ahead, you missed Matthew frowning down at the gesture. “I don’t know how that happened. It’s just—it’s not my thing to do. Go out alone, especially in a place like that. Good instincts by the way,” you tried to joke but it fell flat.

“Don’t mention it,” he said, voice tight. “I don’t want to think about it again if I can help it.” 

You cast a confused stare in his direction but by then, it was his turn to look ahead, a frown marring his features. You didn’t push any further though. 

Later that night, after you and Anna decided to call it a day and switch off the lights, you lay in bed glancing a look up at the ceiling above. You didn’t think back on the evening’s events but rather, thought back to how a familiar small brown paper bag was taped to your room’s door before dinner. Anna had fixed you with a knowing stare as you plucked it off the door, tipping its contents into the palm of your hand. 

Then, you thought how during dinner, Matthew had claimed the seat next to yours and complimented the earrings you wore, remarking how awfully familiar they seemed though he could swear he didn’t know where from. For the first time, you had an inside joke to share with him and neither of you bothered to offer any clarifications to everyone else around the table as they tried to press for details. 

three.

The Flames’ first game of the season was scheduled to take place in Las Vegas and with a few days left of vacation, you couldn’t skip on the opportunity to return to the city you were inexplicably fond of, as well as watching your brother play on the third line. The night promised to be unforgettable, and you wouldn’t miss it for the world. Although there were plenty of things to keep you busy throughout the day, your eyes would occasionally wander down to your watch, counting down the hours until the start of the game. It seemed like most of the city was doing the same.

Often, you’d spot handfuls of people donning Knights jerseys and occasionally, there would be a few Flames fans wandering the streets and locales. You’d only spotted one person wearing your brother’s jersey but that was more than enough for you – he was a fairly new face in the professional league, but he certainly pulled his weight during every shift he had on ice whenever given the opportunity. Luckily, you managed to take a quick photo of their back before they disappeared into the crowds, sending it to your brother along with a thumbs-up emoji. 

He didn’t respond immediately, nor did you expect him to. You could only imagine how quickly he racked up pre-game nerves and he had a pretty strict routine, which included avoiding his phone until after the game. You couldn’t really make sense of superstitions even if each member of your family who played, whether professionally or otherwise, had their own. Naturally, you were surprised when your phone pinged, indicating a new message almost half an hour later. Except, it wasn’t quite who you were expecting.

Matthew is that your way of saying good luck?

You frowned, but all it took was a little more attention on your part to notice you hadn’t sent the message to your brother but rather, to Matthew. Lately, he was one of your top contacts for frequent messaging.

You wrong number

You good luck to you too though, i guess :/ 

Matthew busy?

You don’t you have practice to get to?

Matthew [attachment: photo of an ice rink where a few players were captured in motion]

Matthew [attachment: photo of his skates, taken from the players’ bench]

Matthew on break, where are you?

You hanging around

Matthew what are you wearing? 

You [emoji: middle finger] 

Matthew ice cold

Matthew nice, i can handle ice cold

You then go handle ice cold so you don’t get handled tonight

Matthew wish me luck too

You i already did

Matthew i need it twice, it’s my superstition 

You that’s a bullshit superstition

Matthew if we lose tonight, it’s on you

You [emoji: angry face]

You good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Matthew :) 

You dropped your phone on the table with a low groan, slouching in your chair. From across the table, Anna shot you a confused stare which quickly morphed into understanding when you rolled your eyes, shooting your phone a look of frustration as if the device itself was to blame. 

“Anything interesting?” she asked in a singsong tone. 

“If you count Matthew being his usual self interesting, then that’s what’s up. Otherwise, nothing new.”

“By his usual self, do you mean engaging? Funny? Witty? So good with his words that he yet again takes your attention and keeps it while the rest of us, mere mortals, struggle to do that for longer than a few minutes tops?” 

You arched an eyebrow, somewhat amused. “All that – just empty words.” 

Anna leaned back in her seat, taking her glass with her while twirling the straw, looking ahead somewhat thoughtfully. “You know what the two of you remind me of? Those two kids in the playground who think love can only be expressed through pulling hair and making snide remarks.” 

“First of all, that’s a shitty way of trying to get someone to realize you have feelings for them and second of all, love is a pretty big word. You managing to carry it okay?” 

“Okay, maybe not love. But like? It has to be like. Say what you want to say but it looks different from the outside.” 

“Okay, you keep staying out there and let me know what you’re seeing. I like your imagination. Very vivid,” you commented but there was no bite to your words and Anna threw her head back with laughter. 

You didn’t think much of your exchange with Matthew throughout the rest of the day, nor did you try to linger too long on Anna’s interpretation of your relationship with Matthew. You let it wash over you, knowing it’d give her too much satisfaction if you fretted too much over it and anyway, many of your thoughts seemed to fly towards the evening’s game. 

By the time the two of you made your way to the arena, however, you moved from anxiety to excitement within the space of mere moments, apparently. Even if this wasn’t your first rodeo and you’d been to countless games before, there was nothing quite like the thrill of an opening game. You and Anna had spaces reserved in the upper stands along with other family members and significant others but both of you chose to watch the warm-ups close-up, so you hung around by the glass at ice level. 

The Vegas Knights and the Flames stepped on the ice to a combination of cheers and the thump of a loud electronic mix. You spotted your brother almost instantly. He did a quick lap around the team’s half of the ice before pulling a puck towards him with his stick, sliding it this way and that before shooting it over towards the net. Once sufficiently warmed up, he cast a searching look around the rink and you quickly waved both arms up in the air to try and get his attention. You knew he’d spotted you, but he made an entire show out of looking over you until you smacked a hand against the panel. You knew the sound wouldn’t be heard over the general noise of the arena, but he still laughed. When he skated over, you held your phone up, giving it a quick shake and mouthing “selfie?”. 

He flashed a thumbs up and you quickly turned around to take the photo, but it wasn’t until you inspected it afterwards that you noticed you were photobombed by Matthew himself. You had every intention to look up from the screen and somehow try and get his attention only to glare at him, but he was a step ahead. You almost jumped out of your skin when you noticed Matthew standing right there by the glass, smirking at you.

“Asshole,” you mouthed, not daring to voice it out given you were surrounded by kids.

Matthew winked, skated to collect a stray puck then threw it up over the boards towards one of the kids standing right next to you. The kid was clearly thrilled by the gesture, bouncing up and down with the puck held over his head as if it were a trophy. You couldn’t help it: your heart melted at the sight, so you simply nodded once at Matthew, apparently just in time as the warm-up countdown reached zero.

You weren’t surprised the home team were putting on such a show for the opening night. There was a little bit of Vegas in every opening act: from the fireworks set off outside the arena to the showgirls and mind-blowing animations projected down on the ice, it felt more of a Stanley Cup playoff game than the start of a regular season game. This was Vegas and no one did it quite like Vegas did, you had to give that to them. 

Both teams were almost evenly balanced throughout the first period but stepping out of intermissions and into the second, the Flames started powering ahead. It was as if something had clicked together even better and they functioned as a well-oiled machine, both in offence and defense. By the end of that period, they were leading the Knights 3-2 and you were more than elated your brother had earned himself an assist. Like all games, tensions formed quickly, and the third period saw both teams play aggressively. On several occasions, you caught sight of players clearly chirping each other even while heading towards their respective benches after the end of a shift. Once, Matthew seemed to be involved in a seemingly endless yelling match with a player on the opposing team. There were more checks against the panels, an impressive number of penalties drawn by both teams, and it felt as if the atmosphere was just tethering towards a fight.

It happened right after the Flames scored the fourth goal with just two minutes left of the game. 

The moment the puck was dropped at center ice, you watched as Matthew charged ahead towards one of the Knights players who didn’t hesitate to drop the gloves. Between them, Matthew had the faster instinct, and he landed the first punch, effectively forcing both players to fall to the ice while the referees scrambled to try and split them apart. They were there a moment too late, just mere seconds after you caught sight of knuckles scraping along Matthew’s mouth on the big screens above. At first, it seemed to be nothing more than a graze but once he was separated and made his way towards the Flames bench, you noticed several spots of blood on his jersey on the screens above that made you almost jump out of your seat.

Sure, this was a familiar sight, but it didn’t alleviate the sheer shock and restlessness. Whatever had happened between them must’ve been a pretty big deal to set Matthew off the way it did. There was no way of sugarcoating it: the fight was vicious. More than ever, you wanted the period countdown to reach zero so you could go down to the lockers. It wasn’t just a few nagging feelings towards Matthew that led you to react the way you did. He was a friend, after all, so worrying for him was simply natural. An expected way of responding to a situation like that. 

“He had it worse before, remember?” Anna reminded you as you followed the small stream of relatives and friends down towards the players’ rooms.

“Still looked pretty bad to me,” you responded, briefly pulling your lower lip between your teeth. Before she could continue being the voice of reason, you added in a light tone, “I just want to see if he had any teeth knocked out of his mouth this time around.”

It took some time before the players filed out and as you watched them come out one by one, you almost wished you saved this for somewhere less…well, public. Sure, you were just a friend checking on a friend, but you wished you could do that without an audience. 

Your brother emerged first, beaming, no doubt pleased with the win, and you hugged him tightly, easily sharing his joy. 

“He’s just getting ready to come out now,” he informed you, heading nodding back towards the locker.

You blinked. “What? Oh—no, I’m just. I was waiting for you to say congratulations. What are you even talking about,” you mumbled but inevitably, your eyes were drawn towards the locker room as the door swung open and Matthew stepped out.

His hair was still damp but already curling again. He was dressed in the same suit he probably arrived in, a simple light grey number that fit him perfectly. He had his backpack on also and in one hand, he carried an apparently ice-cold bottle of water while the other was pressing an ice pack to the corner of his mouth. When you made eye contact, he frowned lightly and for a moment, seemed almost hesitant to approach you. This time, you were a step ahead and cornered him before he decided to walk away.

You nodded your head once, indicating in his general direction. “What? You’re trying to add to the family’s hefty dentist bill by getting a few teeth knocked out already?”

Matthew shrugged. “It’s not hockey without a few scraps now and then.”

“For a guy who got a goal and an assist, you sure don’t look too pleased with that.” 

At that comment, Matthew’s expression shifted, lightening up considerably. “Are you keeping track of my stats now?”

“What? No, Tkachuk. I was doing what everyone else in that arena was doing: paying attention generally speaking.” 

Suddenly, his entire face scrunched up in pain and he almost doubled over as he groaned. Instinctively, you reached out for him, eyes widening a little when bending down a little to try and look at his face. 

“Oh my god—Matthew. Are you okay? Do you need me to get a medic to check—” 

You frowned as soon as you felt his shoulders tremble under your touch. Slowly, it dawned on you he was laughing. Laughing. You slapped his shoulder lightly, the gesture more a tap than anything else and you started walking down the corridor quickly, trying to catch up with everyone else as they filed out of the arena. 

“Hey, hey, wait, Y/N! Come on, don’t be mad,” he called out after you and you heard him jog to catch up with you. When he did, he took a couple more steps ahead then stepped in your path, walking backwards to match your pace. “I was only messing around. I couldn’t not do that. You should’ve seen your face, honestly.” 

“My face? Hope you’ve seen yours. I’m not mad. Me being mad would basically mean you managed to get to me which you really didn’t, so don’t give yourself any credit, Tkachuk,” you responded. “You just reminded me you’re still a dick so thanks for that.” 

“Give me a free pass. I’m injured.” 

“If you’re searching for sympathy, you’re looking for it in the wrong place,” you informed him, side stepping him so that he resumed walking at your side instead. After a few moments of silence, you conceded with a sigh. “Seriously speaking. How’s your mouth?”

“Don’t think I’ll need fillers, let’s just say.” He removed his hand from his mouth, and you looked over. 

Thankfully, it seemed that putting ice on it quickly was paying off. The area was somewhat red, but no significant damage seemed to be visible to the untrained eye. He was certainly miles better than he was just months ago. 

“Looks okay, I guess,” you shrugged. “What happened? Honestly, it looked pretty intense from the outside.” 

Matthew didn’t respond and you didn’t press him for details even after you stepped out into the balmy Vegas night. If he chose to not share with you, then you guessed it must’ve been either pretty personal or pretty stupid. You leaned more towards the former. You didn’t even complain when he followed you to the car you hired, claiming the passenger seat. Before you also stepped inside, a message pinged in from Anna informed you she had taken off with Johnny for dinner but promised to be back in the room in a few to catch up.

You didn’t start the engine when you fixed your seatbelt and instead, leaned your head back against the rest, watching a few other vehicles pull out of the car park. In his seat, Matthew was looking out of the window to his left, heading resting against a loosely formed fist propped up against the door. 

“He was talking shit about you,” he said at last, but didn’t turn to you when he spoke. 

“Who was?” 

“The guy on the other team. He made a comment about you towards your brother at the end of the shift. Something about… I don’t know, something crude, vulgar. Don’t really remember it.” 

You didn’t quite believe him on the last part, but you allowed it anyway. “Okay… Well, I don’t know the guy anyway, so it didn’t matter, Matthew. You should have let it slip by or left my brother to deal with it.” Then, out of curiosity, you asked, “why didn’t you?”

More silence. Occasionally, the muffled sound of a passing car would cut through it but it, too, would be gone in seconds.

“Because I couldn’t.”

You pursed your lips and your fingers clenched then unclenched in your lap. You placed your hands on the steering wheel, then dropped them away before settling them back on it after starting the engine. 

“Thanks, I guess. You just keep making me owe you favors.”

“You don’t owe me—”

“So, I’ll clear that now with dinner. Just please don’t tell me you’re going to need to be on a smoothie diet. I’ll feel bad eating something really good while you’re there with a strawberry and banana drink. Not that I’d stop eating though, just so you know. But it’s the thought that counts,” you said and finally, finally he chuckled quietly. 

“No smoothie diets this time.”

You sighed dramatically. “Maybe no smoothie diets ever?”

Matthew shrugged. He was still not meeting your eyes but that was okay. “Can’t promise that. Kind of comes with the job. Just in case though, I like the sweeter stuff more. Triple chocolate, Oreo pieces, peanut butter.” 

“Thanks, Matthew. I’ll file that under information I don’t care to know about.” 

“I’m injured. Show some sympathy,” he demanded without heat, finally turning to you. 

You cooed then reached out with one of your hands to pat his cheek lightly. “Aw, really searching for it in the wrong place.”

“I’ll make do with what I can get,” he allowed, and you could swear he leaned into your touch, but you tore your hand away before either of you got too comfortable. 

four.

Matthew called in his favor after a few of his teammates agreed where to host their Halloween party. 

“Kind of sounds like you’re the one asking for a favor,” you commented, planting yourself at your kitchen table while securing the phone between your ear and shoulder.

Matthew sighed on the other end. “Sort of. Who does a themed Halloween party anyway? The theme itself is Halloween.” 

“You’re not wrong about that. Could be fun though, a bit more unique. So, what’s the theme for this year?” 

“Couple outfits,” Matthew replied without hesitation. 

You stilled and were grateful he wasn’t in the same room as you. It took you a great deal more energy over the course of the past few months to convince yourself that Matthew didn’t attract you in one way or another. His looks aside, it was rare you came across someone who could easily keep up with your snide remarks and the more you got to know him, the more you realized that there was more to Matthew than just being a typical athlete with his share of well-deserved fame. He was funny, dedicated and undoubtedly, caring. You had some first-hand experience with the latter. After all, he didn’t owe you anything to make him obligated to jump into whatever weird situation you found yourself in.

You warmed to him little by little. If you found him attractive, well that was for you alone to know though it made everything just that more difficult. Thankfully, Matthew seemed pretty oblivious to it or at least, he was doing a good job at pretending he didn’t catch you staring at him on several occasions or the few times you took a discrete step back if it felt like you were too close to him. Knowing he was asking you to go together as a couple (pretend couple, you corrected yourself) only added to the difficulty of coming to terms with your…crush. 

Puppy love, you assured yourself. It’ll go as quickly as it came. 

“Y/N?”

“Sorry, still here. Guess it sucks another year will go by without the opportunity to bring out your Fortnite costume.”

“Oh, come on. I wouldn’t dress like a game character!”

“Matthew,” you warned.

There was a pause, then, “okay, fine. Maybe I would. So, can you come?” 

You shrugged, then remembered he couldn’t see it. “I owe it to you, don’t I?”

“Great! Hey, choose something good for us. There’s going to be a prize for best dressed and I have my eyes on it.”

“I think we can both agree my creativity will not let us down. I’ll text you my idea. You just make sure you actually stick to it, so I don’t end up looking stupid.”

“Don’t worry,” he started, “I won’t dump you on Halloween.”

“Good to know I won’t end up traumatized and have my favorite holiday ruined,” you said, by way of goodbye.

-

“Hey, spin around for me once. You look good. Blonde’s not bad on you.” 

“No color’s bad on me,” you responded but refused to entertain Matthew by complying with his request. Instead, you rang the bell to Noah’s apartment after the door didn’t budge when Matthew tried the handle. 

“Come on, just a spin,” Matthew insisted, nudging his elbow into your own then pressed the doorbell himself once again – hard, as if that would make it ring louder.

“Only if you dance for me and do the entire Greased Lightning choreography without missing a step.” 

Matthew feigned a groan and you shot him an amused look. Before you could even comment on that, the door opened, and Noah stood at the threshold. The ruckus from inside spilled out into the corridor and from what you could see beyond him, it was a full house of all sorts of characters. 

“Wow! Sandy and Danny! Finally, someone with really good taste,” Noah said by way of greeting and he looked towards you pointedly. 

You flashed him a grin. “Always a pleasure to exceed expectations,” you responded and stepped into his open arms, a clear invitation for an embrace that was shortly broken apart by Matthew.

“Hey, none of that man,” he said, pulling you back and easily holding most of your weight as you broke into a laugh that had you stumbling into his side. “I didn’t even get to tell her she’s the one that I want.” 

“Yeah, well, you better shape up ‘cause I need a man,” you responded, without missing a beat though you couldn’t help but replay his words in your mind. They sounded a lot like a broken record that you desperately wished to stop immediately before this…thing went way too far and spun out of control.  

You were both led towards a photo wall and if you had any nerves about striking good poses without at least some liquid courage first, all that vanished. To your surprise, Matthew easily took the lead initially, falling to his knees in front of you in an attempt to recreate the part where a smitten Danny fell before Sandy, completely and utterly overwhelmed by her presence. Despite it being difficult to control your laughter, you played along with ease. At first, you were simply grinning down at him but you couldn’t let all his in-character effort go to waste, so you turned, casting a glance down towards him over your shoulder. To your side, Noah’s flash was going off every few seconds as he tried to capture the two of you from the best angle, together with cheers of encouragement. For your second pose, you rested your arms on Matthew’s shoulders once he rose back to his full height and his hands held on to either side of your torso. Again, the flash went off and again, the two of you changed pose into something more casual: him, standing behind you with his palms on your hips while you place a hand on his face, grinning at the camera. The flash went off again and he whooped loudly.

“I’m never inviting both of you to a party with this theme again,” Noah muttered, feigning disgruntlement. “You can’t come into my home and kill it like that.” 

“Blame the one who came up with this idea in the first place,” Matthew defended, holding both hands up in the air in a gesture of innocence. 

It was true. The idea to dress as Danny and Sandy from Grease came to you fairly quickly. You knew the two were a popular go-to, but you enjoyed the movie greatly. Plus, it was a great opportunity for you to pull out a pair of red heels you invested a hefty sum of money into. And, well, admittedly there was something about Matthew that made you think he’d suit the role just fine. When you shared your idea with him, he was on board from the start without complaining or suggesting alternatives. You were grateful for that: when Matthew picked you up earlier, dressed in an all-black outfit, leather jacket and hair styled to rival John Travolta’s, you gave yourself a mental pat on your shoulder. If any photos would go up on the internet, you were pretty sure Instagram would be grateful to you. Certainly, you knew Chantal and Keith would get a kick out of it for sure.

“Guilty as charged,” you acknowledged. “I’m going to look for Anna. Catch you later.” You gave a wave to the both of them before making your way towards the hub of activity where couple costumes ranged from peanut butter and jelly to superheroes. 

She was fairly easy to locate, in part because she told you she and Johnny would dress as Wonder Woman and Steve Trevor. The red, blue and gold of her outfit were unmissable even in a sea of costumes. As soon as she spotted you approaching, she made a beeline and wrapped an arm around yours.

“Tell me you and Matthew will recreate the entire You’re the One That I Want scene,” she pleaded. “Please tell me that at some point this evening, you’ll tell us to clear the dancefloor so the two of you can have your moment.”

You rolled your eyes, dragging her along towards a table hosting drinks and small bites. “There’s no moment we’re going to be having.” 

“Because you don’t want to or because you want to so badly that you don’t know how to ask him? I’m pretty sure he’ll say yes.” 

“Neither,” you muttered but even you’d be able to hear the lack of conviction in your tone from a mile away. 

To take your mind off it, you poured yourself a glass of red wine, taking a tentative sip from it. Across the room, Matthew had deposited his black leather jacket away and started making rounds around the room. You took a longer sip from your wine and looked away. 

Anna fixed you with a knowing stare which you refused to acknowledge, but she knew you like the back of her hand. “It’s okay to say you like him, you know,” she advised, and you hated the soothing tone she tried to take when saying that. It felt more pitying than anything, as if you hadn’t already had your share of disappointments in love—or, relationships better said. 

“Who said anything about liking him? He’s not bad to look at I’ll admit, but that’s where it stops.” You frowned, looking out of the nearest nearby window that gave a broad view of the city below. “That’s where I want it to stop,” you admitted, this time quieter. 

You were well aware that you were occasionally trying to look for a narrative that was most convenient for late night thoughts when you had the peace and privacy to think of him as you wished. The reality couldn’t be more different, though, and you knew that. Matthew was helpful to you before because he was good friends with your brother and eventually, you realized that it was just part of his nature. Beyond being successful, beyond his fame and recognition, Matthew was kind and funny and respectful. It was just that you didn’t give him the chance to before and now that you got to know him better, you suddenly realized that…what? You’d like the first man who gives you a helping hand? If that were the case, you should’ve gotten the memo sooner: it would’ve been easier liking the tech guy from work who once debugged your laptop.

It wasn’t doing you any good to try and look for a ‘but’ in every situation: Matthew is helpful because he’s good friends with my brother but it’s not like that should force him to act as if we’re romantically involved not once or twice or thrice but now, four times. Regardless of how you looked at it, that reeked of desperation. You were in that weird period in your life where it felt as if everyone around you was in a relationship, so maybe that mood translated to you. 

That’s right, you settled. That’s what was possibly behind these thoughts of yours. You found Matthew attractive – and what? So did plenty of other people. You saw him surrounded by girls after practice, after matches, while out. What you felt was nothing special. It felt easier to think of it that way, even if for a few hours to truly enjoy the party without having that lurking at the back of your mind. 

You mingled easily, danced with Anna, danced with other players’ girlfriends and wives, danced with your brother, even attempted a few traditional Russian dances taught by Nikita, Artyom and a few of their friends, that left you breathless by their rapid pace and intricate footwork. 

“I’m done!” you declared, breathless and almost swaying on your feet when another Russian folk song came to an end but thankfully, you managed to hold steady before you could catch a ride on the hot mess express. “Absolutely wasted. Knocked out.” You stepped away, tired but euphoric and dropped rather unceremoniously on one of the available couches pushed against a wall. 

“Having fun?” Matthew asked and there was a light flush on his cheeks you knew wasn’t from dancing. There was even just a slight slur to his speech.

“The most,” you replied, breathless, and accepted the drink he held out to you. You took a sip without questioning him what was in the glass, only to find out for yourself he was settling for harder stuff tonight. “But never let it be said that anyone can keep up with Russians because let me tell you,” you whistled quietly, “we’re a couple of steps behind. Plenty of steps behind, actually.” 

Matthew flashed a lazy smile and you briefly spared a moment to envy him for how kept together he remained despite being evidently buzzed. “’s okay. At least we’re the better dressed ones so we lose in style.” 

You took another sip from his glass, holding it out to him with a smirk. “Tell me about it, stud,” you said in what you hoped was a low, alluring tone of voice but no sooner did you think that, and you were reduced to embarrassed laughter. “Forget about that! Forget it, forget it! Where’s the delete button?” 

“I didn’t come equipped with that,” he declared proudly, finishing off what was left of his drink. “C’mere, you can show me a couple of those steps you learned.” 

He stood, a little unsteadily initially then held a hand to you. You knew he wouldn’t have the strength to pull you up properly, so you stood easily fully intent to actually lead him through some of the steps. Except, Matthew was definitely swaying more than you thought he would. There was something inexplicably amusing about the situation and instead of directing him towards the center of the room, you steered him away from it and towards a small bathroom you were shown to earlier that night when you needed some time to re-touch your makeup. 

“Where’re we going?” he asked curiously, looking over his shoulder towards the living room with a look that could only be read as longing. 

“To cool down a little and then you can learn as many folk dances as you want. Believe me, you need to be alert for them. Can’t miss a step,” you advised, trying to steady him by wrapping an arm around him though the difference in weight between the two of you couldn’t compare. Still, you managed to get him into the bathroom safely without either of you making a mess of yourselves or the room. 

“Are you gonna cool down too?” he questioned. 

“Sure thing, definitely need it.” 

“Good, we’ll cool down together.” With that, he made a move to open the glass partition for the shower cubicle but thankfully, you were significantly more alert than he was and managed to prevent him from doing anything more than that.

“Not that sort of cool down. Here, sit here,” you encouraged, lowering the lid on the toilet so Matthew could drop down. You doubted you’d be able to hold much of his strength above the sink if you were to help him splash some cold water on his face.

“But I want that sort of cool down,” he slurred. “With you. Us two. You said you want to cool down too. Could be a couple activity.” He grinned, as if proud of himself. 

Thankfully, Matthew was buzzed enough to miss the flush on your face, the slight shake of your hand as you arranged a towel around his neck to prevent too much overspill before turning the tap on. 

“Can’t do that, Matthew. Here, this will be much better, I promise.” 

“Wanna try though,” he mumbled but was still compliant as you pressed a wet, cool palm against his forehead, then either of his cheeks. “Not cool enough.” His complaint was accompanied by a frown which only morphed into a lazy smirk when he leaned back, trying to pull you with him. “C’mon, Y/N. It’s a couple’s Halloween night.” 

“Matthew, we’re not a couple,” you said gently, pushing your palms against his shoulders in an attempt to free yourself from his hold. Before it was too late. Before you allowed yourself to get drawn into a drunk man’s ramblings. 

“But I wanna be. A couple, with you.” 

You put all your strength into breaking away from his hold and thankfully, managed to do so. Your heart was hammering in your chest as if desperately trying to release itself from the cage of your ribs. 

“Matthew, you’re drunk. Here, splash some cold water on your face so you can come back to your senses.” 

“But I’m not drunk,” he insisted and as if to demonstrate, he stood up quickly. He swayed on the spot, stretching out his arms a little and once he found his footing, he looked towards you with an expression that mixed pride with hopefulness. “See? Definitely okay—”

You frowned, feeling a little caged in. You should’ve left the door open at least. “Okay, then let’s go back out there, yeah? I can get an Uber and I’ll take you home if you prefer that?” 

“Yes,” he said, then leaned back against the door. “Only if you come with me.” 

You exhaled, suddenly tired as if the exchange was working every ounce of energy out of you. “I’ll come to make sure you’re okay and can make it to your bed okay.”

“I can though. I can definitely make it there even on my own and you know why? Because I’m not drunk,” Matthew insisted and when you shot him a look of disbelief, he peeled himself away from the door. “Look, look I can prove it to you I’m not drunk.” 

Before you could even ask him to walk a straight line without stumbling his steps, Matthew’s arm wrapped around your waist while his other hand pressed on the back of your head, bringing you closer until your lips met. Kissing Matthew was like everything you imagined and more. He even did that with the same passion with which he skated on ice, chasing puck after puck. It left you breathless how well he worked his lips against your own as if all along, he knew how to do that in such way that it’d leave your legs feeling like jelly. Beyond that though, it felt comfortable. Not forceful despite him having not asked if he could do it in the first place, yet it still felt right. You tasted sweetness on his mouth and the sharp tang of whiskey. Vaguely, you knew nothing else could compare. It was that thought that made you push away from him with as much force as you could muster, ducking under his arm and towards the door. 

“I’ll ask someone to take you home,” you said without even looking his way before leaving dashing out of the bathroom.

“You okay?” Anna asked you when you ran into her. Quite literally. 

“Uh—yeah. No, actually. I think I feel a bit unwell so I’m going to head home, okay?” 

You made a move to leave but her arm stopped you. “Hey. Are you sure you’re okay?” 

Above her shoulder, you saw Matthew emerge from the bathroom, a little dazzled, eyes searching the room. Before he could even spot you, you quickly freed yourself from her hold and nodded. “Will be. I’ll text you when I get home. Don’t rush back, okay? Tell Alex I said thanks for the invite.” 

You didn’t stumble a step in your heels as you jogged towards the door, making a swift exit before you attracted even more attention.

+ one.

Matthew left no calls and no messages, but that was fine. You didn’t spend time trying to build your expectations of anything like that happening because drunk words weren’t always sober thoughts. The event was just something you had to deal with and if you had to do it alone, then so be it. Reasonably speaking, you and Matthew went from nothing to friends and if you caught feelings along the way, then that was your mistake for letting yourself slip like that. You were left broken hearted once, you really didn’t want to go through that again especially over someone that wasn’t even really and truly yours to begin with.

So, the next morning, you woke up at a reasonably early hour despite the late night but felt energized enough to sweep through your apartment and collect the garments you tossed carelessly on your way to bed after arriving at home. You said a heartfelt goodbye to Sandy, apologizing that in this scenario, her and Danny didn’t end up driving off in a red convertible. After that, you showered and changed in a fresh set of clothes even if the day would most likely be spent indoors. It was a fitting conclusion to the Halloween weekend, and you could do with some downtime, really.

Anna must’ve stayed with Johnny because regardless of how much noise you made, she didn’t emerge from the room and after fixing a quick breakfast and brewing coffee to continued silence, you knew you were right. It didn’t bother you. You’d make full use of the couch and stretch out on it properly as you flicked through your Netflix account and for the sake of sticking to weekend morning traditions, you selected a lighthearted sitcom. You were halfway through the third episode when your doorbell rang. You could’ve sworn Anna had a spare key of her own unless she misplaced it or forgot it home. Not entirely out of question.

Except, it wasn’t Anna who greeted you when you opened the door.

“Oh.” You coughed lightly, crossing your arms then unfolding them, then leaning one against the doorway before dropping it to your side. “Hey—uh. Hey Tkachuk, isn’t it a bit early for you to be out and about? You were smashed the last time I saw you.” 

Matthew looked over your shoulder into the apartment, as if checking to see if you were alone. “Can I come in?” 

Defeated, you stepped to the side and cleared the way for him to step inside before pushing the door closed. Part of you wished you’d dressed up as if you were ready to head off somewhere. You weren’t quite ready nor willing to face whatever music Matthew had in mind for you. 

In the aftermath of the party, out of the flashiness of the costume, Matthew seemed to be perfectly clear-headed despite the state you’d left him in. The curls atop his head seemed soft despite the natural frizz and as he passed by, you caught a whiff of sharp cologne and fresh bodywash. 

“Is Anna here?”

“Are we playing twenty-one questions?” 

“No?”

“Kind of sounds like it, though?” You laughed quietly, trying to lighten the mood. It was bad enough the weather outside was gloomy, autumn settling in full force. Now, you had to deal with a Matthew who looked as if he wasn’t sure he came to the right place. “Coffee?” you asked, already leading the way towards the kitchen. You heard him follow behind you just moments later. While you poured a full cup for him, he hovered by the table, making you frown at him. “What’s wrong with you? You need an invite to sit down and relax? Seriously, Matthew, you look like you should be in bed.” 

“You left last night without saying anything,” he said instead. 

“Uh—yeah. I was kind of tired and I wanted it to call it a night early so—”

“Was it because of what I said or what I did?” 

You almost dropped the coffee cup, but fortunately only startled enough for the liquid to slosh over the rim and down the back of your hand, causing you to hiss in pain. You cursed quietly and, in an instant, Matthew crossed over the room and took the cup from you, setting it down on the table before leading you towards the sink. As if used to this, he placed your hand under ice cold water and once the sharp pain numbed, you pushed his hand away, taking a step to the side in an attempt to put more distance between you. 

“It’s fine, I’ve got this,” you mumbled, holding your hand still under the jet for a few more seconds before closing it.

It was hardly worth the fuss, but it gave you a reason to make yourself busy with something other than freaking out. It couldn’t be that he remembered anything. It couldn’t be that he was standing in your kitchen, thinking that it was a good idea to just open up that subject when you were so ready to take a shovel to it and bury it six feet under. 

“Didn’t you get tired of it at all?” he tried again.

“Tired of what?”

“Of pretending. Of only acting like we’re together for one reason or the other—”

“Matthew, I asked you only once and you know why. I apologized then but if it helps you sleep better at night, I’ll apologize again for dragging you into my mess. I don’t know what the point is of this discussion—”

“The point,” he said, raising his voice but only to cut through your speech. “The point is that I’m tired of it. I’m tired of having to be by your side and pretend. It got to a stage where I don’t even know what’s real and what isn’t, and I feel as if the only time I’ll know that for sure will be when you find someone, so you no longer need to turn to me to pretend.” 

“Matthew, I’m not using you, if that’s what you’re thinking. You’re coming at me with this out of the blue and I don’t even understand what this is all about,” you argued, waving a hand between the two of you. 

Matthew clenched his jaw. You watched as he flexed it and his eyebrows furrowed. “Do you need me to spell it out for you again? I thought I was pretty straightforward about what I want last night.” 

“You were drunk last night, is what you were. You could hardly put a foot in front of the other.” 

“You know that’s not true,” he retorts, lifting his arms then dropping them back down to his sides. “I was sober enough to know damn well what I said and why I said it. If you want to keep pretending even now, even at this point, then you go ahead and do that but let me be clear with you again and you take what you want from it: I don’t want to pretend with you anymore. I want to be with you. You want to know what that feels like? It feels a lot like being so close to something you want, literally having that thing dangled right in front of you only to have it snatched just when you think it’s yours. Me kissing you last night? I’m sorry I forced it on you, I could’ve gone about doing it differently but I’m not sorry for what I feel. That was all me and not the alcohol. So, you take this and do what you want with it.”

You stared at him, disbelieving your ears. It wouldn’t surprise you if that was the case: you did wake up surprisingly refreshed even after an emotionally charged night, so for all you knew, you could be dreaming this. 

“Matthew, what are you—That’s, you’re kidding me with this right? You can’t. You can’t possibly think that.” 

“And why not?”

“Because it doesn’t make sense. Are you even hearing yourself talk?” 

“Why doesn’t it make sense? Want me to go about it differently? If you let me pull your hair, I’ll let you push me in the sandbox.” 

You were suffering from a strange, ill-timed case of déjà vu. Part of you wanted to laugh at the situation but the bigger part of you triumphed, thankfully. You released a breath you had been holding, bringing both hands up to cover your face, taking some moments to yourself. Or perhaps, you’d lost track of time because eventually, you heard Matthew sigh and felt his fingers wrap around each wrist though he didn’t put pressure to tug your hands down from your face.

“Sorry. I’m just—I’m not doing this the right way. I don’t want it to seem like I’m forcing my feelings on you and that you should accept them. If I misread us—you at any point, then fine. Just, we can drop it here and I’ll deal with it but—”

You shook your head slowly. “No, I just need a moment. Sorry. You really caught me by surprise. I didn’t… I thought everything you said last night…what you did… I thought that was just, well, just the alcohol. So, I did the best thing I knew to do and, uh, left.”

“Drunk words, sober thoughts,” he reminded you quietly and this time, you dropped your hands away from your face so you could look up at him. 

He was so handsome. Ridiculously handsome in his casual clothes. Briefly, you thought back to the time you first found safety in his arms and wondered if maybe… Well, why not. You closed the distance between the two of you, wrapping your arms around him, fingers clinging to the thick material of his hoodie while you faceplanted against his chest and breathed him in.

You liked Matthew. You liked Matthew so much that the admission overwhelmed you so much that you squeezed him to you, trying desperately to bring him closer. The gesture seemed to prompt him into action, and he returned the hug, pressing a kiss to the top of your head and then to the base of your throat once he’d lowered his head there. 

“Me too. I want to be with you too. Really be with you. No more of this pretend stuff,” you told him, your voice muffled against his body, but you knew he caught every word.

He chuckled, the sound low and deep, sending shivers down your spine. “We won Noah’s competition last night.”

“Bet he did it because of your long face,” you commented, unable to help yourself. “What did we win?” 

Matthew made a move to step back, but you clung to him, much to your embarrassment. It seemed as if your body acted out of sync with your mind, but who could blame it when Matthew stood right there, right before you. Turned out he only took a step back to lift you off your feet and instinctively, you wrapped your legs around his hips, arms resting loosely around his neck. You leaned in and pressed a fleeting kiss to his mouth as he stumbled away from the kitchen while you stole another kiss. And then, just because you could, a third. 

“A voucher to a seafood restaurant,” he informed you, breaking into a laugh when you groaned, throwing your head back in sheer frustration even if you had a strong feeling he was only messing with you.

“Remind me to never put so much effort if that’s what the stake are.” 

“Noted. Next time, I’ll tell you we could just stay home for Halloween and play by our rules. Outfits optional. Probably not recommended.” 

“That’s…really not what I said.” 

“I’m reading between the lines. See? We know each other so well.” 

You laughed as he carried you all the way into your room without even as much as breaking a sweat. That was definitely some food for thought at a later point.

[seijorhi]

A Thousand Words

as promised, a Valentine’s Day fic 💕 

Oikawa Tooru x female reader, Iwaizumi Hajime x female reader

TW implied dub/non-con, cheating, minor choking/abuse, nsfw(ish)

You break up with Iwaizumi two weeks before Valentine’s Day, standing in the doorway of the apartment you share with him.

And you hate that it still hurts, still tugs at the wretched, broken strings of your heart to watch that rare, beautiful smile of his fracture like glass, confusion giving way to disbelief and then finally anguish.

Iwa’s never been the best with his words, but it seems that you’ve robbed him of those too as you tell him that your relationship’s over. He just stands there, wide eyed, agonised as you shove your phone – the proof – into his face, a hoarse, strangled whisper of ‘why’ leaves his lips. 

It seems that it’s all that he’s capable of.

There’s nothing for him to say anyway. You don’t want his apologies or his excuses. The pictures are evidence enough. 

A boys weekend, he’d told you, and you’d trusted him. You loved him. He wasn’t like your ex, Iwa would never deliberately do anything to hurt you. 

He knew what fidelity meant to you.

You’d thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with him, but those pictures are enough to show you what a fool’s dream that was. Iwa, naked in bed, wrapped around some other woman.

Sleeping so peacefully, curled up by her side, like he’d done with you a thousand times.

And it doesn’t matter whether he was drunk or not. It doesn’t matter if he knew her or paid for her or found her at some fancy fucking bar downtown. He cheated on you, he broke your heart and he doesn’t get to watch you fall apart in front of him.

You save your tears until the door swings shut, collapsing onto the floor with a heartbroken wail as the man you love walks away.

—

Iwaizumi doesn’t remember much of that night. He’s never been a lightweight, but the drinks they were knocking back would’ve been enough to take out the best of them. And Iwa didn’t have to worry, not when he was out with friends. 

God knows they’d gotten him into so much shit when they were younger and stupider, but between the four of them they’ll stop each other from doing anything too damaging. They have careers now (most of them, anyway) and reputations to protect. And Iwa had you.

Out of everything; his career, his reputation, his livelihood, you were the one thing Iwa wouldn’t risk fucking up.

The night itself is a hazy, incomprehensible blur, but he does remember the girl. Not her name or where she came from, but he remembers her. A pretty face with a sultry smile, wearing some short, tight, shimmering dress. He remembers her sitting on Oikawa’s lap, fingers carding through his hair, red lips kissing at his jaw.

And he remembers Oikawa lounging back in his seat, barely paying the poor girl an ounce of attention, even when her hand started to run teasingly up his thigh, those same sinful lips whispering into his ear.

How the girl managed to find her way from Oikawa’s lap to his hotel bedroom is beyond him, but the pictures don’t lie. It’s his arm wrapped around her waist, her skin littered with love bites and fingerprint shaped bruises.

It was her mouth he’d woken up to, trailing a slow, teasing path up along his chest. He’d shoved her aside, snapped and snarled until the pretty thing welled up with tears and all but fled, leaving him to fall back into the sheets full of self loathing and disgust, wondering how he could possibly have fucked up this badly.

And when he threw up later, hurling until there was nothing left in his stomach, he knew it had nothing to do with the alcohol he’d drunk.

Iwa hadn’t known that anybody knew, hadn’t thought that there was proof – not until you were shoving it in his face, your bottom lip trembling as you tried to keep your tears at bay. And what could he say? 

It was a mistake?

He was drunk?

Iwa doesn’t make excuses, you deserve more than that. You deserve more than him.

He should’ve fallen to his knees and begged – begged you through tears if he had to – for you to give him a second chance. But the words stuck in his throat, because the look of absolute, utter heartbreak on your face felt like a fist driving into his gut, and he wasn’t sure if he even deserved it.

You break up with him two weeks before Valentine’s Day, entirely unaware of the ring he’s been carrying around in his pocket for almost a month now, and Iwaizumi doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do.

So he does the only thing he can, and calls Oikawa.

—

Moving your things out of the apartment you’d spent the last year and a half sharing with your boyfriend – your ex-boyfriend – takes less time than you think. The life you’d started to build with him, packed up in nice neat little boxes in only a few hours.  

And you’re grateful that he’s not there. He’d messaged you to tell you that he wouldn’t be, the only contact you’d had with him since breaking up. 

It’s not the pictures on the nightstand, Iwa’s strong arms wrapped around you, a dopey little grin on his face that gets to you – it’s the World’s Best Boyfriend mug he’d bought you as a joke one day, the old hoodie of yours that was actually his, the one you’d worn half to death because it was warm and smelled like him. 

It’s hard enough to do this without him hovering over you, but stupidly you’d forgotten that while Iwa had promised not to be there, he wasn’t the only one with a key to your shared apartment.

The lock clicks and the door swings open just as you’re finishing up in the bedroom and for one single, split second, your heart jumps into your throat.

But the brunette that saunters in isn’t the one you’re still in love with, and you’re quick to brush away the tears on your face before he can see.

Before he can mock you for it.

Oikawa, ever the charmer, merely grins when he catches sight of you. 

“Did Iwa send you to supervise?” you say in lieu of a proper greeting, the words slightly more bitter than you intend – even for him. 

He isn’t bothered by it, his grin widening just a fraction as he turns and settles down on the bed, long legs stretched out, ankles casually crossed over. He looks entirely too comfortable there and it’s an effort not to bristle.

“Well hello to you too,” he says, his voice a teasing lilt. “Are you always this fun in the mornings?”

Your brows draw together in a frown, but just as you open your mouth to snap a retort, his palms come up in a gesture of mock surrender. “No, Iwa did not send me to supervise you. He doesn’t know I’m here, actually.”

“Then why are you here? To gloat?” you spit.

Oikawa’s eyes glitter, amusement tugging at his lips. You love Iwaizumi, and for his sake you’ve spent the past few years tolerating the constant, overbearing presence of his best and oldest friend. Oikawa, on the other hand has never made all that much of an effort to hide the fact that he doesn’t exactly approve of your relationship with his friend.

Oh, he’s never outwardly rude or hurtful. He doesn’t sit there and spew abuse at you, and as far as you know he hasn’t tried to sway Iwa into leaving you since the very early days of your relationship, but Oikawa doesn’t need to be overt to make his feelings clear.

He treats you like a one night stand that hasn’t quite gotten the hint that it’s time to fix your dress and move right along. 

You still haven’t forgotten the night you all went out to celebrate your boyfriend’s birthday, how he’d slid into Iwa’s empty seat the moment he’d slipped out to get another round of drinks and spoken so casually, as if it was nothing but a friendly conversation. Small talk. 

“You know it won’t last; you and Iwa.”

And you hadn’t said a word, not wanting to be baited into fighting – into ruining Iwa’s night. You hadn’t even scowled at him, just sat there, pretending that he didn’t exist as you waited for your boyfriend to come back to you. 

“You’re cute together, I’ll give you that much,” he’d mused, swallowing the last mouthful of his beer. He’d studied you from beneath long lashes for a moment; a sharp, lingering look entirely at odds with the easy, relaxed tone of his voice. “But you two aren’t a good match. You don’t belong with him.”

You never did figure out exactly what you’d done to make him dislike you so much, but you suppose it doesn’t matter now. 

Not when he’s finally proven himself to be right. 

“Please,” he says with a scoff, rolling those pretty eyes of his, “as if I’d be so immature. I’m just here to make sure you don’t steal the coffee machine – it’s so much better than the one I have at home.”

He spends the next half hour trailing you from room to room, looking entirely too delighted at your misery. It’s almost a relief when you slip into the bathroom just for a moment’s fucking peace, brushing angrily away at the tears that still haven’t left you.

You almost – almost – reach for your phone to message Iwa and tell him to call off his stupid, infuriating friend, except you’d left it lying on the kitchen bench.

—

His head hurts. An incessant pounding, throbbing ache that makes him want to hurl.

Rationally, he’d known that the cure for the monstrous hangover he’d given himself wasn’t going out for a run at five in the morning, but he didn’t know what else to do. It was either that or keep drinking, and considering it was the alcohol that had gotten him into this fucking mess in the first place…

“I need to fix this,” he groans, dropping his head into his hands, letting his fingers roughly run through the tangles of his hair. “I need to fucking fix this.”

He looks like shit, feels like shit, but he can’t bring himself to care, not even as a solid weight drops itself onto the couch beside him. 

“You need to give her space, Iwa,” Oikawa comments with a sigh, passing him a glass of water that he gratefully chugs. “Give her time to figure things out. She’s hurting, and you constantly harassing her won’t do you any favours in trying to win her back.”

He wants to see the truth in his friend’s wisdom. He knows he hurt you, he knows he fucked up, but–

You’d already moved your things out.

He’d known that, of course he had, but coming home to see every trace of you just gone was like a gut punch. He was gonna marry you, get down on one fucking knee in front of everybody and– and now you’re gone and he’s crashing in his best friend’s spare bedroom because the thought of going home without you there is too fucking painful for him to bare.

And he only has himself to blame for it. 

But you’re his future, the only one he really gives a damn about, and he’s not one to just give up and walk away. Iwa doesn’t care if it takes weeks or months, he doesn’t care if he has to spend the rest of his life making this up to you; he will. 

He can’t just let you go. 

Oikawa continues to try and talk sense beside him, but he’s barely paying attention, only offering a small grunt of acknowledgement when he feels the brunette’s eyes studying him. He knows that he’s only trying to help, but he can’t honestly remember the last time Oikawa bothered to introduce him to one of the girls hanging off his arm. He knew as well as his friend did that there wasn’t much point – they wouldn’t be sticking around for long. Fuck, he doesn’t think that Oikawa’s ever had a serious relationship in his life, so excuse him if he’s a little hesitant to take his advice as gospel.

And Oikawa doesn’t know you like Iwaizumi does. He doesn’t understand you, doesn’t see what Iwa does when he looks at you. You’re like… sunlight. There’s no other way he can describe it. It’s cheesy and stupidly sappy, he’d rather be shot than admit it out loud, but he’s never met another person so–so… radiant. You burn bright, and Iwaizumi can’t help but be drawn to you – your warmth and your softness and everything about you. You’re beautiful and caring and you’re home and he’s terrified that if he waits too long, somebody else is gonna see that and snatch you up for themselves and he won’t even be able to blame them for it.

He knows he fucked up, knows that you probably (rightfully) hate him, but he has to try. 

So he ignores the way that Oikawa huffs and rolls his eyes when he reaches for his phone, opening up your last conversation.

Please, can we talk? I know you don’t want anything to do with me right now but I’m begging you. Just ten minutes?

And his heart pounds against his ribcage so violently that he thinks he might be sick as he waits for it to send. Waits for the little ‘Read’ notification to pop up.

And waits.

And waits.

Error. Message failed to send.

He tries again, distinctly aware of the Oikawa’s watchful, curious gaze peering over his shoulder.

Error. Message failed to send.

There’s a sinking feeling in his gut and in his panic, he presses the call button, bringing the phone to his ear with a sick feeling in his stomach.

It doesn’t even ring, there’s just three beeps and the line disconnects.

You’ve blocked his number.

—

You second guess yourself with every step, but you don’t stop and you don’t turn around. 

The radio silence from your ex had been a little unexpected, but you’d been the one to tell him in no uncertain terms that the two of you were done.

You were the one to make a point of moving out, keeping the few messages you’d exchanged short and to the point. Were you expecting him to fight you on it? Blow up your phone with messages and voicemails begging you to come back? Maybe show up at your door demanding that you hear him out and give him another chance. 

Were you maybe just the tiniest bit disappointed that he hadn’t? 

It wasn’t remotely fair to expect that of him, you know that, but you couldn’t help the way your heart had leapt into your throat the moment his message had come through after days of nothing.

Can we talk face to face? I need to see you. 

Two sentences, that was it. And you’d spent the better part of an hour debating whether or not you should reply.

Because you love him still, despite it all. 

The last person you’d given a second chance to had used that chance to walk all over you. He’d broken your heart, your trust, and any semblance of self worth you’d had. Iwaizumi had been the one to build you back up afterwards. 

And now he’d done the same thing. Knowing what you’d gone through before, and it gutted you.

The date on the calendar hasn’t slipped your attention. It’s Valentine’s Day, and you’d spent all morning trying to forget that if things were different, you would have spent the day with Iwa. He’d been secretive about his plans, tight lipped for once in his life, and there’d been some part of you that had wondered, hoped even… but instead you’re sitting alone in a hotel room, feeling miserable for yourself. 

If you were stronger, maybe, and if today were any other day, you might have ignored the message, the way those two brief sentences made your pathetic heart ache, but–

But… perhaps you had been a little too hasty when you’d broken it off. Iwa hadn’t said a word to defend himself, but you hadn’t really given him the option, had you?

Agreeing to meet with him wasn’t agreeing to brush it all under the rug. It wasn’t a promise of forgiveness, or even really an olive branch. It just meant that you would go to hear him out, that’s all.

Just to hear him out.

Yet your stomach’s twisting into knots as you walk up the familiar steps, your heart beating out an unsteady rhythm. You love him, despite it all.

You love him, but that doesn’t stop your hand from trembling as you raise a fist to knock.

The smiling face that greets you when that door swings open, however, is not the one you’re expecting.

“Hey there, cutie. You’re early.”

Oikawa.

For one single, floundering heartbeat, confusion grips you. Why was he– was Iwaizumi not coming? Had you misunderstood the message, or… or had he changed his mind, backed down at the last second and sent his friend to hammer the final nail into the coffin of your failed relationship.

You didn’t think Iwaizumi would be the type, though. He’d never been cruel, he’d never been cowardly, either.

“I don’t… understand,” you breathe, wide eyes darting around as if you’re expecting your ex to suddenly pop up behind his shoulder and shove him aside with a growl, telling him to butt out of your relationship the way he had countless times before.

Yet Oikawa offers no explanation, that same stupid, infuriating grin widening as he steps back to let you in, and you, somewhat robotically, follow him inside. Your eyes flicker from his back to the apartment around you – it’s exactly how you left it last week, not a single thing out of place. 

“Iwa said–” but your voice falls silent as you realise that no, that’s not true. 

The door to your bedroom is ajar, soft, flickering light spilling out from the crack, but that’s not what catches your attention. It’s the rose petals on the floor, the dulcet music playing so quietly you’d missed it entirely. 

Your brow furrows, breath catching in your throat as you stare at the scene before you, utterly frozen. You don’t register Oikawa stepping closer, nor the dark hunger brewing in his eyes. None of this makes any sense, you don’t understand–

“Iwa’s not coming.” Long, delicate fingers grip your chin, tilting your face and before you can even draw breath his lips are pressing against yours. It only lasts a second, long enough for your lagging brain to register that Oikawa is kissing you, here, in the middle of the apartment you’d shared with his best friend.

Oikawa, who hates you. Who’s cupping your cheek, gazing at you with an expression so eager and wanting, so unnervingly wrong that it makes your heart clench in fear and your blood run cold.

His thumb brushes along the curve of your cheekbone,  “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

And then he’s grabbing at your hand, fingers entwining with yours as he tugs you towards the bedroom, and finally the shock wears off enough for reality to kick in.

“What the fu– Oikawa, get the hell off of me!” you snap, trying to wrench yourself free. But he’s stronger than he looks, and his grip merely tightens.

“Tooru,” he calls back, glancing over his shoulder with that impish, wicked little smirk. “I want you to moan it for me tonight. You can do that for me, right cutie?”

You’re not a violent person, you’ve never been the type to lash out with fists and blows, but something inside of you just snaps at his words, and before you can stop yourself, your open palm flies towards his face. 

Quick as lightning, Oikawa spins, catching at your wrist and slamming you up against the living room wall. A small burst of pain radiates through your skull from the impact, your breath forced from your lungs in a pathetic squeak as he boxes you in. There’s not a moment for you to catch your breath, though, not with his forearm pressing down on your throat just hard enough so that you can feel it. He’s always been taller than you, but you’d never considered him to be intimidating – not until he’s looming over you, teeth bared in that feral smirk.

“Oh, baby. If you’re not going to play nice, I won’t either.” His fingers tighten on your wrist, squeezing until a choked whimper slips out and he kisses you once more. Not soft or sweet, but bruising, teeth clacking, nipping and biting and harshly sucking at your bottom lip until you return it.

And when he pulls away, there’s blood on his lips – yours – and he licks it away with a satisfied little hum. “I put effort into this, you know,” he says, his tone almost conversational if not for the slight pant, the shivering undercurrent that laces every word. Oikawa leans closer, and you can feel the outline of his cock, hardening already as he presses it against you, rutting his hips ever so slightly. “Set the bedroom up nice and romantic for our first time together.”

He kisses you again, a sweet, tender peck, smiling when you part.

“But if you want me to fuck you here first, up against the wall, all you had to do was say so.”

—

The girl had been easy enough to convince to play along, which probably should have disgusted him. 

She looked like you; a cheap imitation, of course, but close enough. Oikawa could kid himself that it was for Iwaizumi’s sake, to sow the seeds of doubt in his head, but he knows as he forces her face down into the pillow, slamming his hips against her ass like a man possessed, that that’s not the whole truth.

But she served her purpose well enough, letting him fuck her, mark up that pristine skin with the same kind he’d seen littered across your neck and collarbones, your thighs–

And she’d still tried to kiss him the moment before slipping out of her robe and climbing into his best friend’s bed. Given him that playful wink, biting her bottom lip seductively as if she were anything but a means to an end for him. 

As if he hadn’t forgotten her name the moment he’d gotten those pictures.

Oikawa knows all about your ex and how that asshole treated you, out of all the possible scenarios he could have engineered, this would be the one that’d hurt you the most. He’d thought that you would fly off the handle, kick Iwa out for a few days and leave the door open just wide enough for him to weasel his way in, but you’d gone one step further. 

You’d left him.

Broken his heart completely, the way he’d broken yours. Oikawa couldn’t have planned it better himself, and oh what he would have killed to have been there to see it. 

And it’s not that he enjoys his best friend’s pain – truly, he wants Iwa to be happy, he does.

Just not with you. Not when you’re his.

It was easy enough to bully Iwa into revealing when you’d be coming over to pick up your things. Easy enough to rile you up to the point you’d run and hide just so he wouldn’t see you shed all those pretty tears.

Leaving your phone unattended. And really, it’s your own fault for choosing such an obvious passcode – how could he possibly resist?

You were none the wiser, his poor, unsuspecting little idiot. 

Yet for all your posturing and your badly concealed hurt, he’d known that you’d show up today. You’re a romantic at heart, and you’d let yourself be walked all over again if you thought it meant that somebody loved you, wouldn’t you?

You would’ve said yes when he’d gotten down on one knee, and when he’d come back to you with tears in his eyes, drowning in regret and you saw what a mess Iwaizumi was without you, you would have forgiven him – even if it meant giving him the power to break you all over again.

Oikawa honestly doesn’t know whether he should admire or pity you for it.

It hardly matters now, he supposes. Not when you’re so beautifully wrecked, lying nestled against his bare chest with those tears he adores spilling down your flushed cheeks. Every thump of your heart echoing his. 

He wonders if he should send Iwaizumi a picture. 

[oikawaplssteponme]

locked lips

pairing: Pro Hero! Izuku Midoriya x fem! reader

ratings/warnings: NSFW 18+ MINORS DNI [please im literally begging you], swearing, legal consumption of alcohol, slight praise, fingering, use of the name ‘baby’, deku being a little bit of a cocky jerk, unprotected intercourse, make-up sex

genre: ex’s to lovers, smut, aged up characters, fluff/angst (?)

word count: ~2.2k words

synopsis: You broke up with him on impulse. That doesn’t mean you stopped loving him. Now you’re back at his place, at a party you planned, with him looking just so desirable. What else were you to do?

a/n: hi hi! alright friends, this being my first nsfw post i cannot stress enough how important it is that minors don’t interact. if i catch any minors interacting with this post, ill delete this post and block them, which i obviously don’t want to have to do. just please respect these rules :)) anyway, reblogs are greatly appreciated and enjoy xx

You scrolled through your phone, mindlessly. You tried your best not to double tap on any of the pictures on your screen. The last thing you needed was for him to know you were stalking his page.

“You should start getting ready,” said Uraraka. You looked over at her, cocking a brow.

“Uh I'm not going?” you huffed. Uraraka sat down beside you.

“Don’t be like that Y/N. You still have to go tonight, regardless of Deku.”

“The party is at Deku’s house. I’d look like a total idiot showing my face there after we broke up.”

You sat up and crossed your arms. Ochaco sighed. She grabbed your shoulders.

“Y/N, you are gonna go to the party and make Deku regret his entire life. Anyway, I’m bringing you as my plus one, so you have to come!”

You sighed. “Fine, but I’m staying with you the whole night.”

Ochaco smiled and gave you a quick hug. She got up and began scanning through her closet again.

You had been staying with Uraraka since you and Izuku had broken up. It was a blow out fight. You yelled at him for caring about work more than you. He shouted at you for not being understanding of his career. The words you meant mixed with the words you didn’t, and chaos erupted between you and him. So, you packed a bag and left. You didn’t want to, but you were done.

While you and Deku were still together, you helped him plan an event for him and his fellow Pro Heroes, as an opportunity for them all to get together. Now, you would be attending that same event. Only, not with him.

“Who would’ve thought there’d be a day where I’d have too many clothes to choose from,” laughed Ochaco. You smiled.

“You should wear that pink dress Iida bought you for your birthday. I don’t think you’ve worn it out yet.”

“You think? It’s not too much…”

“Of course not! You’ll look hot,” you teased. Ochaco smiled.

“Alright alright I’ll wear it. But then you have to wear this!” She pulled out a bag from her closet and handed it to you.

“Please don’t tell me you bought me something…”

“I had to! All your clothes are still at his place...and I wanted to make sure you felt good tonight.”

You gave Ochaco a nudge and pulled out the tissue paper. You felt the soft material in between your fingertips, pulling it out from the bag.

“Uraraka...”

“No need to thank me. You’ve been through hell and back these last few weeks, the least I could do is get you a pretty dress.”

You jumped towards your friend, engulfing her in a hug.

“Thank you.”

“Hey now, let’s get ready! The limousine will be here in just a few hours!”

~

You sat in the back of the limo with Ochaco as you were on your way to Deku’s party. You looked like a million bucks. A little part of you hoped someone would take notice.

The estate where Izuku lived was gated off. Once you were let inside, you could see the beaming lights from the top of the hill. You felt your stomach clench, nerves building inside of you. You wanted to see him, but you also didn’t want to see him doing better without you. You haven’t even been apart that long. A month maybe? Certainly not long enough for him to be over you, because you certainly weren’t over him.

“Oh wow, Deku went all out!” cheered Ochaco. You looked to see the endless decorations and glamor that surrounded you.

“Yeah, these were my ideas,” you mumbled. Ochaco placed a hand on your shoulder.

“Don’t stress about it. Let’s just have fun, okay?”

You exited the vehicle and began to make your way inside. Champagne fountains and blasting music greeting you. His house was just as extraordinary as you remembered it. Nothing less than perfect for the No. 1 Hero.

“Uravity! Y/N!”

You turned to see your friend Iida, plus others from your old days at UA.

“You two are looking stunning tonight!” smiled Kirishima.

“Why thank you, it’s all thanks to this one,” you chuckled, giving Ochaco a nudge.

“I honestly didn’t expect to see you here tonight Y/N,” said Shoto. You shrugged.

“Well, I was invited after all. So Mr. Number One Hero can deal with it,” you huffed.

“Sounds like you could use a drink.”

Kaminari handed you a glass of champagne, which you took happily. You clinked glasses with your friends before dousing the beverage down.

“It’s gonna be a long night,” you mumbled to yourself.

You found yourself on the living room couch of Izuku’s large complex. You watched as Pro Heroes danced mindlessly with far too many drinks in their systems. You chuckled. At least they’re having fun.

You hadn’t seen Izuku all night, which was strange considering this was his party. You looked over to the glass staircase, knowing more than well that his bedroom was upstairs. You knew the layout like the back of your hand, after all, you lived here for a year.

You knew all your stuff had to be upstairs. You only had time to pack a small bag the day you left. Surely he wasn’t awful enough to throw your things away. You got up from the couch and quietly made your way up the stairs, hoping no one saw you sneak away from the action of the party.

His bedroom was at the end of the hallway. The doors were closed. You placed your shaky hand on the doorknob and turned it slowly. It was unlocked.

You stepped inside. The smell of his cologne filled your senses, causing memories to flood in as well. His room was neat, as if no one had been sleeping in it. You turned to the closet. All your clothing should be on the right side.

“Sneaking around?”

You jumped, removing your hand from the closet handle. You turned around slowly.

“Just wanted to make sure you didn’t burn my shit,” you huffed. Izuku chuckled. He took a few steps towards you, opening the closet.

“Don’t paint me as a villain Y/N. All your things are safe and sound.”

Your side of the closet was just as you left it. Exactly how you left it. You looked back to Izuku.

“Perfect. Then I’ll be taking it with me when I leave-”

“I’m surprised you came at all. I figured you’d want to be as far away from here as possible.”

“I didn’t come for you, I came for Ochaco.”

“Oh right.”

Deku took a step back, placing his hands in his pockets. That devilish smile stared you down, causing your face to burn. You could see the outline of his muscles through his white button down.

“You look incredible by the way. New dress?” he smirked. You rolled your eyes.

“Well since all my clothes were here, yes.”

“Well serves you right for leaving out of nowhere.”

Your eyes widened and you clenched your fists.

“I didn’t leave out of nowhere, I left because you cared more about your job than me!”

“That’s not true-”

“To hell it is! I was tired of being second to everything so I left!”

Izuku took a deep breath and stepped closer to you. He placed his hand under your chin, having you look at him.

“I didn’t want to break up.”

Your breathing got heavier without you even realizing it. You also didn’t realize that Midoriya had you pressed against the closet door.

“I-I didn’t want to either…” you whispered. Izuku smiled.

“Then tell me baby, why did we?”

“B-Because I didn’t know what else to do…”

Izuku brushed his thumb against your cheek, then took a step back.

“Look, I’m sorry. The last thing I wanted was to make you feel under-appreciated...but-”

Izuku moved closer to you again, pinning your arms to your sides and pressing his torso against you all in a swift motion.

“-I can think of a better way to prove it to you.”

You tried to catch your breath. All you wanted was him at this exact moment. Was that a good thing? Of course not. Did you care? Of course not.

“Then prove it to me.”

Izuku wasted little time in moving you onto his California-king. He pinned you down onto the mattress and instantly kissed you. You felt the rush of butterflies swarm your stomach. You hated how much you had missed this.

Deku let go of your wrists and you began to unbutton his shirt. With little patience, he helped you from out of your dress. He dived back down, locking lips with you once more. You dragged your nails down his back, listening as soft groans escaped his lips. He moved down to kiss and suck on your neck.

“Fuck~” was all you were able to get out. Izuku’s hands grazed your burning body, feeling the skin that he had been craving since the day you left. He snaked his hand to your back, unbuckling your bra easily.

“I’ve still got it…” he teased. He threw the bra to the floor and gave you little time to breathe before kissing you again. You ran your fingers through his fluffy hair, pulling him impossibly closer.

“Izuku...please…”

His puppy dog eyes stared back at you.

“What is it?”

You panted heavily, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“I need you.”

A smirk creeped onto his face. Izuku kissed your cheek.

“I promised I was gonna prove it to you, wasn’t I?”

Izuku sat up, unbuckling his belt. He slid off his pants and boxers. You caught a glimpse of him, causing your body to feel on fire. Midoriya placed his head in between your legs. He teasingly kissed your inner thighs, keeping his hands glued onto them. The anticipation was practically killing you.

“Izuku-”

“Patience baby...I’m in no rush…”

He moved up to your underwear, biting onto one of the strings and pulling it down. They were practically soaked already. Same with your bra, he tossed them to the floor.

He continued to kiss and nip at your thighs, inching impossibly closer to you. You couldn’t take it anymore.

You grabbed Izuku up and kissed him feverishly.

“So eager baby~”

“Please just fuck me,” you whispered. Izuku chuckled. He licked his lips.

“As you wish.”

Izuku spread your legs apart, dipping one of his fingers inside of you with ease. You arched your back, letting out a moan, and gripping onto his arm tightly.

“That’s it baby~”

Midoriya slipped another finger in, stretching you out even more. You clenched around him as he added more pressure.

He removed his fingers and better adjusted himself above you. He held his cock in his hand before slowly pushing it inside of you.

You didn’t remember him ever feeling this good.

Izuku began to thrust into you, slow at first before building in speed. You could feel yourself clenching around him, sweat forming on your skin. Midoriya groaned with each movement as he pushed even deeper. He kissed you as he fucked you, though you were such a mess you could barely keep up.

He knew exactly how to get you worked up.

“Oh god...I’m c-close,” you mumbled.

“Not yet…”

Midoriya moved his hand down, taking his thumb and rubbing your needy clit. You gripped onto him even harder, digging your nails into his skin as he pushed you over the edge.

“Oh fuck-fuck-”

“Fuck baby, I-I love you-I’m sorry-” he stuttered out.

“I-I love you t-too. Fuck Izuku- I’m gonna cum-”

“Cum with me baby-”

Izuku went even harder as he reached his climax, following you. You let out a pleasure filled scream as you let go. Izuku laid on top of you, catching his breath as your body shook below him.

He looked up at you, brushing his hair back.

“I love you,” he repeated, in case you didn’t believe him the first time. You smiled.

“I love you too.”

~

You had forgotten all about the party that was occurring below you. As you got redressed to head back down to meet Ochaco, you felt Izuku grab your hand.

“What is it?” you asked him. Midoriya took your other hand as he stood before you.

“I really am sorry. I don’t want you to leave again,” he explained. You sighed. You ran your fingers through his hair, kissing his cheek.

“It’s okay, I won’t.”

You walked downstairs with Izuku, his hand interlocked with yours. You watched as Ochaco’s jaw dropped at the sight of you.

“Oh so that’s where you were for the last hour and a half?” she huffed. You chuckled nervously.

“Yeah sorry…”

“Well the limo is here to take us back home, or are you staying here?” she asked. You looked up at Midoriya.

“I’m staying.”

Soon the Midoriya residence was quiet, just you and him remained. You curled up with him on the couch, his arms holding you tightly as he kissed your head.

“You wanna know why I didn’t get rid of any of your things?” he said. You laughed.

“Why didn’t you?”

“Because I knew you’d be back.”

•

reblogs are greatly appreciated <3

[theonewiththefanfics]

Black Ice (one-shot)

Synopsis: Black ice is considered one of the most dangerous winter weather phenomenon. It appears after it’s rained or snow has melted and then the rapidly cooling air freezes it, leaving it as a shiny black mirror on the ground.  A deadly shiny black mirror. 

Pairing: Harry Styles x fem!Reader

Genre: angst, fluff

Warnings: swearing, mentions of hospitals and injuries

Word count: 8852

“God, Harry, it’s just one night!” Y/N exasperated, throwing her hands in the air. “One fucking night I wanna go out with my friends and have some fun. Is that really too much to ask?”

        “I haven’t seen you in two months!” he snapped back. “So, please fucking forgive me that I wanna spend a night in with my girlfriend and have her say ‘no’ one time, and make me a priority. Is it so hard to reschedule?”

        “Yes, Harry it is!” Y/N stood her ground. “Adam and I have been talking about this for three weeks before we could set a date and meet up. He fucking flew out here! To London! And it’s not my fault you haven’t been home in two months, so don’t put that on me.”

        “No,” he shook his head pointing a finger at her. “Don’t pull that shit on me. You knew about my job, you know how it can be, how much I have to travel.”

        “I get that, and I’d get your anger if I was fucking off with my friends on our anniversary without any notice or some shit, but I’m not! I made these plans ages ago. I told you about them! How could I have known you’d decide to ‘surprise’ me a week early?”

        But the thing for Harry was – he did think there was an anniversary to celebrate. It wasn’t an official one, and he hadn’t told Y/N how much the date meant, but that day was the day they’d met a year prior.

***

        He was in the middle of filming ‘Darling Don’t Worry’. This time they'd flown out of California to shoot a scene in the middle of the woods, in the cold of November, which as exciting as it was to have his acting career flourish, Harry wasn't too happy about freezing his ass off in the middle of nowhere.

Y/N, however, lived right next to those woods, her family house having been there for generations, while the location scouts of the movie had chosen the location because the aesthetic could double as the location of the woods behind the mansion.

        Y/N’d been out on her daily run (well, daily complaining because Y/N, with all her being, hated running, and thought it was a sign you were a masochist. But her best friend Adam loved running and hated going alone, so he bribed her with the promise of pizza afterwards), when they’d run into pitched white tents, filming equipment and barriers encasing a part of the path they were on.

        Adam’s eyebrows furrowed as he slowed his pace, and Y/N thanked god for that because she felt like she was about to pass out.

        “What’s going on here?”

        “Dunno,” Y/N huffed. “But we should probably leave.”

        But instead, Adam grabbed her by the bicep, dragging her forward to the set. “Nope. Come on.”

        “Adam!” she hissed. “What the fuck are you – “

        “Hi!” He flashed a woman standing by the railing a smile. “Could you-uh-tell us what’s going on? Why’s the path blocked?”

        “A movie’s being filmed. Sorry for the disturbance.”

        “Mhm, and when do you think you’ll be leaving?”

        That she hadn’t expected, given how typically when people saw a movie set, they’d be more than intrigued in getting into a shot or finding out about who were the stars, not when they’d be going away.

        “Oh, uh,” she stammered. “I’m not too sure. Depends if the snow starts falling and how much we manage to shoot. Sorry. But uh, would you be so kind and find a path around?”

        Y/N jumped in, flashing her a kind smile. “Yes, thank you. So sorry to have disturb –“

        “You do realise this is a public place?” Adam raised an eyebrow. “We have a right to be here.”

        “Adam, shut up,” Y/N groaned. “We can run around them, it’s not a big deal.”

        “But this is our route!”

        “Adam for fuck’s sake! It’s the woods, you don’t own them!”

        “Exactly!” he said. “And neither do they! They have no rights to infringe on our ability to get to the sea.”

        That’s when Harry had noticed her, and to this day Y/N had no clue as to why he’d fallen for her. He was conversing with Florence about the upcoming scene when his ears caught the very end of the conversation, green eyes snapping to where two people in running tracksuits stood.

        One of them was a tall burly man, muscles practically ripping apart his clothes at the seams, the other was a shorter woman, hands-on-hips, hair kept away by a headband which also covered her ears, and the most done expression on her face as she glared at her companion.

        They were talking with a nervous assistant; Harry could see by her stature and how her head kept snapping to the side in hopes of finding someone above her to deal with the two strangers.

        “Adam, I swear to god, I’ll punch you." Harry heard the woman exclaim. "Leave the girl alone! We can run around.”

        “But I –“

        “Adam!”

        “Fine,” he grumbled as he threw the assistant and apologetic look. “Sorry.”

        “ ‘S okay. Have my preferred cycling route as well, so yeah… Sorry.”

        Harry watched as the woman next to the person, Adam, shook her head and gestured to where the barriers curved around, starting up on a slow jog, and when they passed where he was standing by the trailers, he could hear them still arguing. 

        “Oh my god,” Harry heard her whisper while looking at the ground. “I’m friends with a fucking Karen.”

        “I am NOT a – you’re Harry Fucking Styles!” Adam shouted so hard, it startled Y/N, and when she looked over, it was like a deer in headlights before relaxing and both of them slowed their pace.

        “Sorry,” she gave him an awkward glance. “He’s a fan, but we’ll be going and stop bothering you...”

        “No, no,” Harry shook his head, putting his hands in his coat’s pockets and smiling. “ ‘S alright, you’re no bother. I’m always happy to talk to a fan.”

        “Yes, well, don’t encourage him. Soon enough, you’ll be besties, and Adam here’ll be turning your life into absolute chaos.”

        He scoffed looking down at his friend. “I’d like to think I’m taking you out of your boring routine, Y/N, and giving it some spice.”

        “Anyway,” she gritted out. “It was lovely to meet you, but uh, we should probably be on our way. You have to be somewhere.”

        Y/N’s eyes glanced over Harry’s shoulder, where a nervous AD stood, bouncing on her feet, a weary smile on her face as she caught the singer’s eyes and motioned with her head he was needed back on set.

        Harry nodded and wanted to turn back to tell the two to come by whenever they wanted (well mainly Y/N), but when he turned around, the two were already quite a few feet away. Just as he was about to leave, he heard Y/N shout, “Congratulations on the three Grammy nominations, by the way. ‘Fine Line’ was amazing.”

        “And that’s a compliment!” Adam hollered jogging backwards. “She only listens to shit from the early 2000s.”

        “Adam, shut up!”

        With that, Harry was left to watch the two disappear behind the trees, a feeling he was quite familiar with settling in his chest.

        It was three days later, when he saw Y/N approaching the set barriers, hands in her pockets, as she rolled her neck. Their eyes met, and even, from the distance, he could see her smile split apart her face, but when she just waved without the intention of coming any closer to the lot, Harry rushed to the side calling out to her. “Hey!” 

        “Hey!” Y/N responded chuckling and ducking her head down. “You alright?”

        “ ‘M alive. How ‘bout you? You doin’ fine?’”

        “The bar’s so low?”

        “I guess. Won’t be able to get you to nurse me back to health though, which is why I’m in the cold again.”

        She wiggled her eyebrows at Harry. “If you wanted to see me, there's no need to lose limbs or bits of yourself.”

        Harry hadn’t expected her to be so upfront, but he couldn’t lie and say he didn’t like it. Made it easier for him to understand if his advances were welcome or if he should back off. “So uh, no Adam today?”

        “No, he has a late shift at work. Which means I’m spared from the running.”

        “Not a fan?” he looked at her with a quirked brow, seemingly saying ‘you’re sure dressed like you are’.

        “Do I look like someone who likes stabbing pain in her side and having her heart ripped out of her chest?

        “You’re just not breathing properly.”

        Y/N sighed. “If one of you gives me any more advice about how to properly run when I don’t even want to run, I swear I’ll stab you.”

        “Okay!” he threw his hands up in surrender, laughing. “No more talk about running if I wanna keep my head on my shoulders. Where are you uh going? You don’t have to answer, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

        Y/N squealed on the inside, but bit her lip to keep the grin away. She’d been dying to talk to Harry since they’d briefly met but had no real reason. Not that she had one now, but she’d had a horrible day at work and needed to clear her head, and what was better than the forest air (also she could scream there without anyone really caring). “You’re not, so don’t worry. I’m uh I’m going to the sea.”

        Harry’s eyebrows rose. “There’s sea nearby?”

        “You’re like a fifteen-minute walk away from it,” she chuckled, stuffing her hands in her coat’s pockets. “Should really be more aware of your surroundings.”

        “We’re in the middle of nowhere.”

        Y/N tilted her head. “Yeah, you’re kind of right. But it’s places like these where you can find the best spots.”

        “Will you show me then?”

        She looked at him with an unreadable expression, and he could only hope his nervousness wasn’t as apparent, because Harry was more than convinced his erratically beating heart could be heard miles away. But then she nodded, giving him a wide grin, making one of his own bloom on his face. 

“You sure you won’t freeze on your way there?” she said in a sarcastic tone eyeing him up and down, and Harry shoved her a bit.   

        He donned one of the standard down-jackets issued for the movie with winter boots, but given the costume underneath, he was chilled to the bone. “It’s bloody cold, and my toes are freezing off. How are you still standing?”

        “Insulated shoes and thermal clothes. Kinda boiling actually.”

        “I should steal ‘em.” He smiled at her. “Probably have frostbite by now.”

        “Wow, you people from the South UK really are weak.”

        Harry’s gasp made her smile as wide as a Cheshire cat. “How dare you!” He dramatically placed a hand on his chest, Y/N’s laughter erupting through the air. It cut through the yells and shouts from the filming crew, and made a warmth spread in his chest. “How do you know about the South versus North? You don’t sound like you’re from the UK.”

        “Studied there for three years; had loads of flatmates from all around, let alone course mates.” Y/N chuckled and shook her head. “And to say that I thrived on the chaos  was when you said North was better than the South would be an understatement.”

        “Well, I guess I know where your loyalties lie.”

        “Did you expect me to immediately swoon over you?” Y/N batted her eyelashes at him. “Oh, Mr Harry Styles. Your voice in ‘Kiwi’ was so good it fucked me to cloud nine. Will you please do that to me with your dick instead? Which you should take as a compliment again, considering kiwi is the only thing I’m allergic to.”

        “Wait,” he looked at her, eyebrows up to the middle of his forehead. “So you have heard my stuff?”

        “Well, I don’t live completely under a rock. I did say 'Fine Line' was amazing.”

        “But you don’t really like it?”

        Y/N shook her head. “ ‘S not that I don’t like yours or other pop stuff, ‘s just that I have a preference, and I guess it’s, as Adam said, ‘early 2000s shit’.”

        A sly smile appeared on Harry’s face. “But could that include by any chance 'One Direction'?”

        “Afraid not,” Y/N sighed giving him a pout. “When you came onto the scene, my heart was already taken by a boyband. And I can be a lot of things, but I most definitely a loyal bitch.”

        “One band at a time kind of gal?”

        “Exactly.” She beamed. God Harry had never wanted to kiss a person that bad. 

        “Duly noted, but I will need to know who they are, and how many graves do I have to dig? You know, for research purposes.”

        “Going method now?”

        “What’dya mean?”

        Y/N shrugged sniffling a bit from the frosty weather. “Looked up a little bit about the movie. Need to know what kind of people might be around in the area. Psychological thriller. Wife. Rich husband. A dark secret. My guess – someone’s dead and buried. Also, the huge pit we walked past was kind of a give-away.”

        He paused for a second before nodding. “Fair enough.”

        A comfortable silence fell between the two as Y/N motioned with her head to where they needed to turn and made their way onto a new path when she spoke. “ ‘S not that I wasn’t a fan,” Y/N shrugged glancing at Harry from the side. “The songs were really catchy, but I guess I got tired of them? Like they were on the radio so much, it was a relief I didn’t have to hear the five of you singing about how I don’t know I’m beautiful.”

        Harry threw his head back in a laugh. “Don’t worry. Sometimes we’d get sick of it ourselves. But umm, ‘Fine Line’… You said you liked it… Do ya’ have a favourite song?”

        Y/N cringed. “Is it cliché if I say ‘Golden’? Because it’s ‘Golden’. I’m a sucker for a slow and then a ‘bam!’ kind of an opening.”

        Harry shook his head. Now he was the one biting back a grin. “ ‘S not cliché. Was one of my favourites to write, so I’m glad you appreciate it.”

        “Also, it makes me feel sunny? If that makes sense? Like – like when I listen to it, I feel warm and safe and just happy...”

        He’d be lying if he said his heart wasn’t pounding in his chest at her words. Warm. Safe. Sunny. “Well,” Harry cleared his throat to keep the words ‘One day I’ll marry you’ at bay. Fuck, he'd only known her for like twenty minutes! “I’m glad you like it more than my previous stuff.”

        “You just love putting me in uncomfortable situations, don’t you?”

        He smiled, nudging her shoulder with his, and was just about gearing up to take a breath and ask Y/N out (before he could ask to marry her), when quick steps from behind him drew their attention. 

        Dressed in a typical 50s housewife dress with a black coat on top, Florence Pugh came to stand beside them, and Harry swore he saw mischief twinkle in her eyes as she raked them over both people and then settled on Harry’s companion.

        “Hi!” she said giving Y/N a bright smile, and a wink to Harry, which passed the other girl’s head, given how she was absolutely fangirling right now. “I’m Florence.”

        “I – yeah – I – you – I love you,” Y/N finally breathed out. “Fuck, I just, you know, 'Midsommar' was a fever dream, but I absolutely loved it, and I can’t wait for 'Black Widow' to come out. Oh my god, I think I’m gonna pass out.”

        “Please don’t.” She laughed grabbing onto Y/N’s shoulder. “Feels like I already know you, but I’ve been dying to meet you actually. Created quite the commotion yesterday.”

        You know how they say men can think of absolutely nothing, like have a completely blank page in their head? Yeah, Y/N was having that exact moment. 

        Florence tutted crossing her arms over her chest and looking at Harry with mock disappointment. “But Harry here just kept talking about you, without any intention of inviting you to the trailers, so I had to take things into my own hands.”

        “You’ve been wanting to meet me?” Y/N breathed out, hands going into her hair, looking at Harry. “Oh my god, what is happening? Am I hallucinating?”

        “No, you’re not,” Harry grumbled glaring at Florence. “Unfortunately. But we were on our way to the sea, so I’ll see you back on se-“

        “Hello there,” Chris Pine’s smooth voice interrupted them, as he extended a hand for Y/N to shake as he jogged up to the trio. “I’m Chris.”

        “Wow, your eyes are even bluer in real life.” Her own Y/E/C ones widened. “Did I just say that out loud?”

        “You did,” Chris chuckled, “but I most certainly take it as a compliment. You said you were going to the sea?”

        “Uh, yeah,” Y/N breathed out still gazing into Pine’s eyes. “Wanna join?”

        Harry wanted to scream, but he couldn’t really. As much he wanted to tell both Florence and Chris to go away, he didn't. Seeing Y/N’s eyes light up as the two other actors conversed with her, laughed and joked around, made his heart expand.

        It was insane to him, that a woman he’d seen twice in his life could have such a huge impact. It was like she’d been his missing part. Well, no. Harry didn’t like that notion – that the ‘right’ person would complete someone. People were complete on their own, but it was true to him that there was someone out there that’d make each and every moment special, someone who would help the other become better, but also hold them accountable when needed. 

        They wandered around the seashore, which like Y/N had said, was a fifteen-minute walk, for about half an hour before turning back to the woods.

        By that point, she’d somewhat calmed down, and could actually comprehend what Chris and Florence were saying to her, and it was rather enjoyable to ask all the questions about Hollywood and the industry most people wouldn’t say on the record. 

        At around four PM when all of them got back to set and Olivia came to tell them they were wrapping up for the day, Florence, and Chris split from Y/N, telling her to come by whenever she wanted, while Harry said he’d walk her to the end of the trail.

        “You know I’ll be fine. I grew up here, know these paths like the back of my hand.”

        “ ‘S alright,” he shrugged his shoulders. “I’m sure they won’t mind much if I come back ten minutes later.”

        “You know, you’re not how I thought you’d be.”

        “What’dya mean?”

        “I – I don’t even really know… just not how I imagined you.”

        Harry didn’t know what to really do with that information, but the look on Y/N’s face most definitely didn’t seem like she meant it in a bad way. In fact, her shy smile and fleeting glances told him otherwise. At least he hoped he read her features right.

        They said goodbye with soft ‘see you laters' and he watched her throw one last glance at him over her shoulder before he himself retreated and ventured to the trailers to start de-shedding the character of Jack for the night.

        Harry plopped down in his seat with a groan, fishing out his phone from the pocket while the hair and make-up team did their work, taking the products off his face before applying moisturiser to the stressed skin.

        Florence poked him in the cheek, and he swatted away at her hand, looking up from Instagram (or his attempts to find Y/N with just knowing her first name). “What’s wrong?” she asked, poking his pouting face again.

        “She literally fangirled about everyone but me.” He huffed sliding down even further in his seat. 

        Florence raised an eyebrow. “Jealous, Styles?”

        “No,” he scoffed crossing his arms. “Why would I be jealous?”

        “Because literally both mornings that we've got here, you’ve been fidgety, keeping a watch of the path, and didn't calm down until Y/N appeared just now. So I’d say you’re absolutely smitten with the girl and are jealous because she’s more of a fan of us than you.”

        “I know she likes me.” His eyebrows furrowed. “I think. She hasn’t told me to fuck off.”

        “She’s a stranger you met in the middle of the woods. You should hope she likes you. But not too much. Otherwise, it could so easily become a scene out of a horror movie.”

        Chris bit his lip looking at Olivia, who’d come in the trailer after having seen the group come back with an almost heartbroken gaze – it was clear as a summer’s day Harry was struck by the girl, but they had to face the music. “Harry,” he started. “You – you do realise we end filming here in two weeks, right? And she’s a local.”

        “And?” his eyebrows furrowed at Chris’ words.

        “You’ll be leaving in two weeks for another three months of filming, while she stays here. I don’t – I don’t want to see you hurt, but you have to realise that most likely nothing will happen.”

        “And what makes you say that? Maybe she could come with.”

        “Y/N is her own person with her own life, job and friends, which, as it seems is all set here.”

        “Besides you don't really even know her,” Olivia said as well. “It's been two days."

        “Sometimes a day is enough.”

        A silence settled over them, as Harry tapped his phone against his nails.

        “You guys, come on!” Florence came to his defence. “He likes her. Why not give it a shot?”

He'd flashed her a thankful smile and mouthed a 'thank you' to which she just gave him an encouraging nod. She was on his side. She believed he could do it. And he did. Using Florence's faith in him as a catalyst, a day later when Y/N had gone on her run with Adam, Harry had excused himself and joined the two. 

        Adam was thrilled to the bone, but he was also competitive, so after ten minutes of trying to persuade the woman to run faster so he could beat his previous time, he took off on his own, with a promise of meeting up by the shore. That’s when Harry grabbed Y/N by her bicep and stalled them both, confusion written all over her features.

        “I uh,” he started. “I wanted to ask you something.”

        “Yeah, sure. Go ahead.”

        “I – “ he stuttered taking in a deep breath. “I – uh – and you have zero obligations to respond, but uh – I was wondering if you’d like to go on a date with me sometime?”

        That made Y/N do a double-take. “You want to go out? On a date? With me?”

        “Ye – yeah.” It was uncertain how the word came out, but it felt so good to say it. “Yes, I really do.”

        “Sorry.” She shook her head looking at the ground with furrowed brows. “Sorry’s just, kinda hard to believe it.”

        “ ‘Nd why’s that?”

        “Well because the first time we met, I looked like a sweaty mess, the second, I could barely function around your friends and co-workers, and now, well now I look like a sweaty mess again.”

        “So?”

        “I just –” Y/N laughed but waved him off. “Never mind.”

         Fear instantly took hold of his core at her statement, so he rushed to salvage what could be salvaged. “No, I mean if you don’t want, you - you don’t have to say ‘yes’. I’m not gonna be upset or any –“

        “Harry!” This time Y/N placed her hand on his shoulder to stop his ramblings. “I’d love to go on a date with you.”

        “You – you would?”

        “Yes.” Her smile blinded him like the golden rays of sun which broke through the overcast sky. “I’d like to very much so.”

        But it was Y/N’s tearful huff, a storm cloud compared to the warm light from his memories, which brought him out of the fond thoughts and into the icy right now.

        “Because unless it revolves around Harry Styles, it doesn’t matter, right?” she let out a pained laugh. “Because unless he’s there to have all the spotlight on him, it’s not important. Unless it’s not something he wants to take part in, it immediately needs to be cancelled or rescheduled because god forbid someone made plans without him.”

        He grunted in disagreement. “You know that’s not what I meant!”

        “No,” she snapped, snatching her purse and coat. “I get it. Very clearly. I’ll show myself out.”

        “Don’t be so dramatic!”

        She scoffed, glaring at him. “Call me when you get your head out of your ass.”

        The door slammed shut, and Harry sat down onto the sofa to scream into a pillow.

***

        Y/N’s sight was blurry as she drove down the street. A light snow had started to fall over London, so she was twice as careful, knowing Londoners had zero clue how to function when snow hit, and no one had winter tires.

        “Fuck,” she choked out, wiping away at her cheeks.

        She’d had fights with Harry before, it wasn’t like they were perfect. From the outside they looked like nothing could ever be wrong, but they were human. They had flaws and tempers and ideas and beliefs, and sometimes they clashed, but it’d never been as bad as it was that night. 

        She loved Harry, Y/N truly did. She’d even had dreams of the two of them in some far-off cottage in the Italian mountains living a domestic life, but she also just wanted one night to herself. To let loose and think about her own needs and wants, while Harry was away doing the same. It wasn’t selfish, not in her mind. 

        It’d been her who’d uprooted her whole life to be closer to Harry, not the other way around. She was always the one cancelling and making new plans with her family or friends just so she could spend a spare second with Harry. She was there for his sleepless nights and there for his knock-out concerts. Why couldn't he let her have this one thing?

        She was sitting by the wheel at a red light taking in deep breaths to calm herself down. 

        The light turned green, and her hand was slightly shaking as she changed gears.

        Y/N released the clutch and pressed down on the gas.

        Two lights came rushing from the side.

        She gasped.

        A sharp pain went through her side.

        And then it was all black.

***

Anne was going to rip Harry a new one, as she rang him for the fifteenth time, but he still didn't pick up. After the accident and the nurses being unable to contact Harry, they obviously called Y/N’s parents which were next on the emergency contact's list, but given how they lived outside of the UK and the next flight was only in four days, they immediately reached out to Anne, begging for her to go be with their daughter while they got there.

“And please tell Harry to fly over as well!” Y/N’s mum had cried. “I – I know he has work, but please.”

Anne had been shocked to hear Y/M/N ask that, having assumed he was already there, but she wasn’t going to let them get to Harry before she set him straight herself. 

In the beginning, she’d been kind of sceptical, but after spending an evening together where Y/N, her and Gemma all did wine baking, and it had ended up in a disaster in the kitchen with the three of them crying from laughter while Harry stood at the entrance completely baffled and just so done with them, Anne knew Y/N only had good intentions with her son.

        Anne’s love for her only grew from that point on, when she also realised just how much Y/N’s love language was giving. It wasn’t the kind of ‘hey, look, I bought you some fancy thing, now love me’, it was ‘hey, I saw how much you wanted this, I noticed how much it’d mean to you, and I love how happy it makes you. And if it reminds you of me, that’s just a bonus’, and Anne couldn’t help but become as protective of Y/N as her own kids. 

        But at that moment, as finally, after her twenty-seventh attempt, Harry picked up with a gruff ‘ ‘ello?’, Anne was about to burst with rage.

“You get to the hospital right now!” she hissed into the phone.

“What are you talking about?” There was a tremble in his voice. 

The thing was, for two days since Y/N had stormed out, Harry’d been feeling sick. He thought it was due to the stress from the fight and from the pressure his label was putting on him, but now he understood it wasn’t that. It was his instinct telling him something bad had happened, and at Anne’s words, the bad feeling that’d settled in his stomach made his blood run cold. “Mum, what’s wrong?”

“Y/N was in a car accident, and you didn’t bother to pick up your phone.”

“I –” He stammered unable to process her words. “What? Mum? No…”

“You’re her emergency contact,” Anne spoke. “The hospital tried to call you a billion times, and you didn’t pick up.” 

And that’s when he remembered all of those calls from unknown numbers. He thought they’d been some crazed fans who’d gotten his personal number, so he’d just blocked them. “Mum, no.” Harry choked out. “I didn’t mean to – we fought – mum…”

“She’s at St. Helen’s. Please get here.”

He immediately ended the call, and in the span of twenty minutes was at the hospital, which Anne was sure to scold him for because there was no way in hell anyone who didn’t speed would be able to get to St. Helen’s in less than forty minutes. The second she saw her son burst through the door, tear tracks down his face, all the anger and disappointment vanished. 

“Where is she? Is she alive? Y/N!” he yelled across the hallway. “Where is she? Mum! Where’s Y/N?”

“Gem.” She patted her daughter’s knee as both of them stood up from where they’d been sitting at the chairs outside the recovery room assigned to Y/N. “Get a nurse, please.”

Gemma didn’t need an explanation or reasoning seeing Harry’s wild eyes, erratic breathing and shaky hands. 

“Mum!” He practically sprinted after seeing the woman, grabbing her by the shoulders.

“Calm down, Harry,” she shushed him, pulling him in for a hug and feeling his whole body tremble. “Calm down, it’s alright. Gem’ll get you some help, but you need to breathe.”

“I – I’m not the one who needs help!” Harry pretty much screamed. “I need to know if my girlfriend is alive.”

Anne spoke in a calm voice as to not agitate him even more, and her heart broke at the sight of her son so utterly broken. “Harry, you’re about to have a panic attack, and you’re no use to Y/N in that kind of state.”

“So.” He took in a chocked back breath. “So she’s alive?” He didn’t know what he’d do if the answer was anything else but a resounding ‘yes’. There was no version in his brain of where his life could possibly lead but down if he had to go on without Y/N.

“Yes,” Anne nodded, smoothing his hair away from his face, and watching as he took in a deep breath of relief. “She was just wheeled in for her second surgery. Should be out in about four hours. ”

All over again his insides froze. “Second? Mum, tell me the truth – how bad is it?”

“Harry, this is routine,” Gemma put a reassuring hand on his shoulder having returned with a nurse behind her, the man keeping a close eye on Harry and his behaviour. “They did as much as they could the first time, but their priority was on the worst injuries. This one is just to set things properly.”

“Set everything right like – “

“Like bones and stuff…” Gemma shuddered, trailing off. “Y/N broke her hip, dislocated her kneecap, her ankle was shattered and she fractured her collarbone. They took her in so that the bones could be properly placed together and there’s a lesser chance of complications not only while healing but later on in life. But can you please sit down? So they can help you as well?”

“I – alright,” he conceded, taking a place on one of the stiff plastic benches, as the nurse came to him, took his pulse, gave him an inhalator just in case and some herbal tablets to help him relax a bit.

“You said they focused on the worst injuries.” Harry looked at his mother. “What were those?”

Anne sighed, leaning to sit back on the chair next to him and ran a hand through his hair. “A piece of debris punctured one of her kidneys. The bleeding was pretty intense, but they say it was salvageable, so she’ll still have both of them. Gem donated some blood.”

“Thank you,” Harry whispered, looking over at his sister who wiped a stray tear away from his cheek.

She shook her head. “There’s nothing to thank me for. Y/N is family. If she’d lost the kidney, I’d give her mine in a second.”

“The worst they’re worried about is the head injuries,” Anne said. “Luckily, she got away without anything major, but she definitely has a concussion and minor whiplash to her neck, so they want to keep an eye out for any side effects that could arise. They have another surgery scheduled for her in a week if recovery goes as planned. To take the stitches that won’t dissolve out and put in the ones that will.”

        Harry sagged against his mother’s side, her palms soothingly running up and down his back. “She’s gonna be alright, love,” Anne muttered in his hair, pressing a kiss to his temple. “She’s strong. She’ll be okay.”

        It was comforting for both of them – for Anne to have her youngest in her arms, to know he was safe and sound, and for Harry to be held by his mother, the person who always knew how to comfort him when times were rough, and at that moment, they were the roughest they’d ever been.

        “You’ve got some nerve to be here.” Adam’s seething voice pulled Harry away from his mother’s embrace and watched as he rounded the corner with a coffee cup. He was quite sure he was keeping his temper well in check from how hard he was gripping the Styrofoam cup. “Fucking ignore her for two days while she’s laying in the hospital, and appear when it’s convenient for you? Is she some fucking toy for you to use when you want?”

        Anne’s tone was consoling and pleading. “He didn’t know.”

        “The hell he didn’t, he just didn’t want to know! They called you!” Adam pointed at the nurse’s desk. “And you let them go to voicemail. And then, better yet, you fucking blocked the number.”

        “I didn’t know it was the hospital,” he weakly defended himself.

        “Because you didn’t bother to find out.”

        He didn’t have anything to say to that. And not that he really could think of anything when the surgery ward’s doors swung open and they watched as a nurse wheeled Y/N’s gurney back inside the room, while another wheeled her saline bag along with. 

It was a terrifying sight to see. Her face was basically nothing but a swollen piece of flesh, bruises and scratches littering her cheeks, a neck brace to keep her head from moving while one leg was wrapped in a full-on cast, the other in one up until her knee and her left arm was in a sling.

        He’d had nightmares about her before. Most of the times it was about Y/N leaving him because she could no longer do it, could no longer commit to the hectic lifestyle that came with Harry, and as he screamed, banging on the invisible window that separated them, she just walked away, his sobs carried by the wind in the other direction.

        “You should go inside,” Anne whispered motioning with her head to where the nurses checked the monitors and how stable Y/N was. “I know you had a fight, but she’ll want you to be there when she wakes up.”

        “How,” Harry gulped back the lump that’d risen in his throat. “How do you know? How do you know she doesn’t want me to just disappear? I wasn’t there when she needed me, I was – “

        Anne put her hand on his cheek. “Because when she woke up yesterday morning for the first time, you were the first person she asked for. You. She wants you there. And it’s the least you can do for her.”

        He nodded, then took a deep breath and entered Y/N’s room. Watching her lay in the bed, unmoving, without her usual grumpy features as she slept, made Harry sick to the stomach so much so, he thought he’d have to call back the nurse.

        It was some twisted version of Sleeping Beauty, yet he knew a true loves kiss wouldn’t awaken her. Y/N just laid there, small breaths making her chest rise and fall, not even a flutter of her eyelids.

        Harry had spent countless night watching her sleep, looking at how her lashes fluttered as she dreamed of something; how her forehead creased and small, incoherent noises passed her lips as she talked to someone in her mind.

        Now, he was surrounded by none of that, only artificial reminders that she was still alive and fighting to get better.

        With uneven steps, Harry made his way to the chair which’d been stationed next to her bed (he was convinced beyond belief that Gemma, his mum and Adam had all taken shifts to sit there, to be there for Y/N), and much like a king who knew he was unfit for the throne, Harry had to swallow a lump as he took the seat.

        “I – I don’t know if you can hear me…” Harry took hold of Y/N’s palm and let out a sob of relief when he felt it was warm, not cold like he’d feared. “But I’m here for you. I’m not leaving. Not unless you want me to, so until you wake up…” there were so many words, so many apologies he wanted to say, but kept them at bay. Y/N deserved to hear them when she was conscious, so instead, he said, “I’m here, lovie. Get some rest, I’ll be here…”

        With that he put his head on the side of her bed, twisting his face so he could look up at her, watch her chest rise and fall in a steady rhythm, and fell asleep to the sound the beeps of Y/N’s beating heart.

        While he slept he dreamt again, the same terrifying dream of Y/N leaving, only this time she did look back at him, but her face was all wrong, her neck bent in a way it shouldn’t be, and eyes covered in a milky white. 

        “You weren’t there, Harry,” she said in a voice void of emotions. “So why should I be there for you?”

        Harry was 100% sure if he’d been hooked up to a heart rate monitor while he slept, people would think he was going into cardiac arrest, but it sure would’ve shown it flatlining as his green eyes swept over his lover’s frame to check his nightmare hadn’t become a reality, only to be met with two Y/E/C sparkling orbs looking back at him, giving him the softest gaze in the universe.

“Hey,” Harry’s tone was quiet, afraid to bring even the littlest of discomfort to Y/N given her state, and he had to physically restrain himself from sweeping down to bring her in a hug. 

What he saw on her face made his heart leap to his throat, as she smiled, genuinely happy to see him, lifting up her right hand, the only limb without a bandage on to cup his cheek. “Hey, love.” Her voice was scratchy like nails on a chalkboard, but to Harry, it was an absolute symphony. “Are you alright? Your eyes are puffy. Have you been getting enough sleep?”

        “Fuck,” Harry choked on his tears looking up at the white ceiling before back at her, complete disbelief in his blood-shot eyes. “You’re the one lying in a hospital bed, with casts and bandages all over you, scheduled for a third surgery, and you’re asking me if I’m alright?”

        If Y/N could, she would’ve shrugged as if that wasn’t the most self-explanatory thing in the world. “I’ll always want to know if you’re alright. ‘S not exclusively you that can care for people, you know.”

        And there she was – his sarcastic, allergic-to-kiwi-but-‘Kiwi’-loving girl that never ceased to amaze him, as she made sure everyone else was alright before herself. And that made Harry break down. 

“I’m so sorry Y/N. So fucking sorry. I – god – I – there are not enough words in any language to say how fucking sorry I am. I should’ve been here, should’ve never let you leave. This is all my fault.”

Through all that, through his choked back sobs and crying, Y/N’s hand had steadily remained on his cheek, wiping away the tears from underneath one eye before switching to the other side and making the little pearls of hurt disappear with just her touch. 

“Harry, are you the weatherman?”

That was not what he thought she would say. “I – what?”

“Do you control temperatures and have not told me?”

“N – no?”

“Were you the guy who ran the red light?”

“No.”

        “Then how is this your fault?”

        “I – “ he stammered. “I shouldn’t have let you leave. I should’ve gone after you, found a way to make you stay or – or should’ve fucking stopped being so selfish and driven you to see Adam yourself.”

        “Harry, had you tried to make me stay nothing would’ve changed.” Y/N sighed letting him lean into her touch, as she bit her lip, thinking over her words. “I was just so pissed, that I think anything you would’ve tried to do, would’ve only made it worse. And I’d rather be here with you than alone in my apartment crying in a tub of Hagen Dazs because of a broken heart.”

        “You-you've got your priorities completely backwards.” He wasn’t laughing when he said that, but Y/N was.

        “Maybe.” She raised her eyebrow. “But I don’t think so. The bones will heal, but the amount of love I have for you… I’m afraid you’ve ruined the thought of a future without you in it. We’ll talk,” Y/N swallowed hard. “We need to talk, but when I get better. Right now, I just wanna hold your hand and have you hold mine as I try not to kick the nurses trying to take my blood for tests.”

        It felt inappropriate for Harry to smile, to feel happy about how Y/N hadn’t told him to go screw himself, even though he felt like he deserved it, but fuck was it impossible not to when his body felt so light, and her love chose to invade the dark corners of his mind to fill it with golden warmth.

        She fell asleep not long after their small conversation, body too tired and in need of recovery, but like he’d promised, he was there for her when she awoke again, this time to a more familiar Y/N as she glared at the coffee cup in his hand, while he sipped, a ring clad palm gently pushing away strands of Y/H/C hair from her face.

        “I hate that you can drink coffee.”

        “Yeah, and why’s that?”

        “Because I can’t.”

        “I’ll happily buy you as many coffees as you like. Once you get better and are allowed to, of course.”

        Y/N snorted and then winced as the action caused pain to shoot through her body. “Knowing you, it won’t be a cup of coffee or a coffee machine, but a fucking coffee chain restaurant.”

        “Would it be that bad to own one?”

        Her eyebrow rose at him in an incredulous look. “You know I can’t bake. Coffee shops include pastries, and I’m not the one who worked in a bakery. I can cook, I can clean, but make me make muffins from scratch, and I’ll set your house on fire.”

        “You already did.” Harry laughed. “Gem and mum helped.”

        “They supplied the wine, so I’m putting 60% of the blame on them.”

        “You do realise that equates to 30% of the blame on each of them, and most of it is still on you?”

        “Shut up,” Y/N smiled, weakly pushing against Harry’s arm, but the motion made him happy to know she was trying. “I was just in a car crash, so forgive me for not being that great at division.”

        A knock at the door made Harry look up, Y/N not even attempting to turn her head to see who’d interrupted them, given how the first time she’d tried it with the neck-brace, it’d hurt so bad she’d passed out.

        Her doctor was a man in his mid to late fifties with greying hair, Y/N’s medical record file slapped underneath his arm.

        “How are we doing today?”

        “Better than yesterday, I guess,” she responded. 

        “Well, you were out for most of it, so I’d say so.”

        Y/N and the doctor chuckled, but Harry didn’t, as he thought of how bad, how absolutely tired a person has to be to sleep for a whole day. He’d had those days himself, and that was from being exhausted from work. He couldn't imagine what being in a bloody accident would feel like. 

        The doctor stepped forward a bit and extended a hand to Harry, introducing himself as Dr Tate, while Harry rose in his seat to accept it, but not wanting to move away an inch from Y/N.

        “You must be the boyfriend.”

        “I – uh – I can only hope I still am,” he let out a nervous giggle, which made his girlfriend slap his arm, a furrow on her face.

        Dr Tate looked Harry over from head to toe, eyebrow raised at that, but all he said was, “We tried to contact you, seeing as you’re Miss Y/L/N emergency contact, but the nurses said it couldn’t go through.”

        “He was filming overseas.” Y/N butted in, clearly having rehearsed what to say beforehand. “Flew over as fast as he could. I’m the luckiest person in the world.” Her tone was soft as a feather, but Harry’s stomach felt like it was filled with rocks. 

        “Is there anything I can help with?” he asked hoping to be given some sort of a task to do, to allow him to redeem himself some way.

        “Well, actually yes. One of the injuries Ms Y/L/N sustained was a concussion,” the doctor said, “which could lead to some complications like headaches, migraines, spotty vision or amnesia.”

“Amnesia?” Harry wanted to vomit. It had crossed his mind, but having a professional say it made it all so much worse. 

        “Yes, and we’d need someone to be with her as much as possible, 24/7 would be desirable, to keep an eye on.”

        Harry honestly hadn’t heard anything past the amnesia part, mind spinning in a circle that just screamed ‘she’ll forget all about you’.

“It’s nothing to worry about too much.” Dr Tate was quick on his feet, seeing Harry’s blank stare, and tried to diffuse any possible spiralling. “With Y/N’s cognitive abilities and having repeatedly excelled at the test without a single stutter, it’s very unlikely she’ll have those side effects. 

“But it’s still a possibility, right?”

The doctor nodded, giving Harry a kind smile. “Which is why I’m informing you of it. To keep an eye out to see if anything changes so you could come in if necessary. But as I said – Y/N’s memory has proven to be intact so far. And I always say to trust the facts.”

“Harry,” Y/N placed her hand on his. “You know I won’t forget you.”

“I’ll uh, give you two a second.” The doctor exited leaving them alone, an almost sad silence over both of them. 

“God I almost lost you to some idiot running a red light with no winter tires, and now you won’t remember me. And – and even with everything you’re going through, you’re still trying to protect me? Why did you lie? I – I wouldn’t have cared if you said the truth that I was an asshole.” Harry dragged both hands over his face, trying to keep the cry’s at bay as Y/N ran her hand through his hair in an attempt to calm him down.

“I’d prefer to think,” Y/N shrugged trying to tease him and make him crack a smile, “me being dead would be the worst-case scenario, not me forgetting you. And of course, I’ll protect you. Your reputation matters to me. Just because we had a fight doesn’t mean I’ll immediately run to everyone I can and say how shitty of a person you were in those specific ten minutes.”

But Harry’s lips didn’t quirk up, the tears didn’t disappear as the painful grimace on his face wasn’t replaced by the crow lines next to his eyes from smiling so much. “What if you – what if you forget you love me? What do I do then? I know I sound selfish and like the biggest fucking dick, but as pathetic as it is – I can’t go on without you. I don’t know how I could.”

Y/N’s heart broke at his words because if the roles were reversed if Harry forgot about her and fell out of love, she didn't know how she'd survive. She’d had those fears before, when he was away filming and she couldn’t follow; she’d been terrified because what they’d had was so new, he could easily move on, find someone better, someone who was familiar with his lifestyle. But any time those thoughts came to her mind, Y/N reminded herself of what she’d do. And that’s what she told Harry.

        “Then you make me fall in love with you again. You’re great at that. Make me love you more with every passing moment.”

        “And – and if you don’t fall in love with me again?”

        Y/N shook her head. “Impossible, Harry. You made me fall in love with you after barely two hours spent together. And well, if you put your mind to it… who knows how much deeper I’ll fall.”

        For the first time in two days, Harry leaned down and pressed his lips against Y/N’s. The kiss was soft and sweet, a barely-there touch, but it meant everything. It was a promise to one another to love unconditionally, to remind the other of it at every passing moment; it sealed their future to be spent together, and neither wanted it any other way.

        Harry’s phone rang, eliciting a whine from Y/N as he pulled away to answer it. “It’s Florence.” He pecked her lips one more time. “I’ll just tell her to call back.”

        He turned to the side for a second muttering a soft ‘hey, can you –‘ before whatever Florence told him made him pull away and extend the deivice towards Y/N.

        “It’s for you.”

        “For – for me? Florence is calling me?”

        Had the two women become friends? Yes. But didn’t mean Y/N had an easier time not fangirling about her. 

        “Hi, Flo,” she breathed out, looking at Harry with wide, happy eyes. “Yeah, I’m alright.”

        Harry sat there watching as his love talked to someone she looked up to, and someone he cared about. He hadn’t told Florence, but her encouragement meant the world to him, as she was partially the reason he’d gotten together with Y/N. After all, she’d been the one on his side from the very beginning.

        Y/N giggled like a crazy person after the call ended and she handed Harry back his phone. “Florence Pugh just called to give me well wishes.” She gasped looking at Harry. “Do you think Chris Pine will too?”

        “God, I love you,” Harry laughed with her, pressing their foreheads together.

        They’d be alright, they’d make sure of it. No matter if a disagreement arose, egos needed to be put in check or black ice covered the roads. They’d get through anything. 

Tags (crossed out wouldn’t take):

Everything tags: @lumelgy @palaiasaurus64​ @supernaturalbaesduh​ @breezy1415​ @crazy--me​ @thatawkwardlittlefangirl​ @sea040561​ @staryeyedgirl​ @deathbyarabbit​ @s-c-a-r-e-d-po-t-t-e-r @reblogger-not-a-blogger @m-a-t-91​ @dalilx​ @i-need-a-hero-i-need-a-loki @maladaptive-ninja-returns​ @averyrogers83​ @in-the-end-im-still-trash​ @gallifreyansass​ @dewy-biitch​ @avxgers​ @unlikelygalaxygiver​ @magicwithaknife​ @ollyoxenfrees​ @bnhvrdy​ @tvwhoresblog​ @celebsimagines @thatkindofgurl​ @sj-thefan​ @teenwolflover28 @lestersglitterglue​ @im-squished​

Harry Styles tags: @sarcasticallywitty15​ @breezykpop​ @girlboss99​ @harrystylesdoesntknowiexist​ @alliyjane​ @sirtommyholland​

A/N: Listen, Linda, those pictures of Harry on set does things!!!

Also the being allergic to kiwi - that’s me. Like legit it’s the only thing I’m allergic to. I always hated how they tasted like pain, like it made my mouth sting and feel like pins and needles before going numb, and according to professionals, that’s a sign of being allergic. But I love ‘Kiwi’ the song. 

P.S. my tags are always open :)

P.S.S. I don’t take requests, sorry :(

[thestarrynightslover]

You and Me

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

Word count: 2,649

Warnings: Angsttt, slight swearing, mentions of harassment and violence (all show-like, tho).

Summary: Jay and (y/n) were trying to navigate their secret workplace romance when an unexpected event agitates their feelings about it.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the One Chicago shows, or its characters, also not associated with it in any way or know anyone involved with it.

A/N: No, I am not very sure of what exactly this is, sorry! I think it turned out kinda messy but, being honest, I just really wanted to write their interactions within that kind of angst! 

Anyways, I hope this isn’t too bad and I am very sorry about dropping this kind of imagine instead of something good enough to help us heal from the finales.  

(y/n) = (your name) (y/l/n) = (your last name) (y/n/n) = (your nickname)

| masterlist |

It had been about 20 minutes since you finally convinced Kevin that you were okay and that he should go home when you heard someone knock on the door. You knew it was him. It had to be him. You needed it to be him. So you quickly moved to open, after checking the peephole. As soon as there was a hint of an opening, you felt Jay’s arms around you, his breath on your neck, and his voice cracking with concern.

"Oh my God, baby, I was so worried about you!" He sounded absolutely desperate, his arms enveloping you in just the way your own despair required him to.

"I know, I know... I just... I-" You tried to let out but couldn't continue because you'd started sobbing. Around Jay, it was inevitable for you to put your walls down. And, almost as soon as your tears started to fall, your boyfriend brought you even closer; holding you tightly by the waist with one arm, the other stroking your hair.

"Shh, it's gonna be okay, princess. You're okay now." He told you, but the truth was he wanted to cry as well. Not only had those past days been pure agony for him — a lonely agony —, but, also, because, even with you like that, you both knew that Jay wouldn't be able to keep a promise to stay the night if he got a call from work. Because no one knew that he needed to stay by your side. That you needed him there. Because no one knew how much all of that was hurting him, too. Because no one knew anything.

"I'm just- I just came so- so close this time, you know?" You tried to let him in on how you were feeling, pulling away a little so you could see his face better.

"I know." He replied, letting out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. "And it all happened so suddenly, I felt so stupid, powerless..." Jay confessed, as he remembered the operation that’d gotten you abducted, leaving the entire team with no clue on how it happened. 

But, for your boyfriend, it was pretty clear, though: the two of you were covering one side of the building and, afraid you might get upset with him for hovering, he didn’t have your back the way he should have. It was his fault that it all happened to you.

"Jay... That wasn't your fault, okay?” You stated firmly, as if you knew exactly what he was thinking. “None of us could've guessed that it would turn into something that, um, bad..." You said, not being able to stop the shiver that ran through your body, which made Jay go back to holding you close.

"Still, I should have done a better job at protecting you-" He started to mutter quietly in your hair, but you stopped him with a disapproving look.

"Stop, okay? Just stop! I'm a cop too, I have been a cop for about the same time that you have and I never needed or had a boyfriend protecting me in some special manner on the job!" He just stared at you, shock and hurt in his eyes.

"I know that, okay? I do know that." He told you quickly, as his hands went up from your sides, in a sign of surrender. "And I'm sorry if it came across as if I thought any differently. I'm sorry, baby. It's just that-" He paused for a moment, looking so hurt while sighing deeply, "It was really hard to not know what was going on with you, even after you went to the hospital... I mean they called Kevin to go stay with you in the hospital!" Another sigh, this time, an annoyed one. "And, seeing that, I guess that I just- I just wished that none of it had happened?"

"Jay..."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't be saying this right now. I'm making this about me, when it's actually about you, geez." He reprehended himself while pinching the bridge of his nose.

"No, no! It's okay. Because this is about you, too. And I'm glad you're telling me how you feel." Hearing that, he just looked at you and wondered about how on Earth he had managed to snatch someone like you. "First things first: what happened to me wasn't your fault. I don’t say this often but: as great a partner as Kevin is, I love working by your side. And, I do it without any fear or concern because I know you'll have my back. One hundred percent." You assured him while giving his hand a gentle squeeze, "now, the second thing: you do know that they only called Kevin because he is my partner, right?"

"I, uh, I do know that," yet another sigh.

"Okay, Jay. I love you and I really need you right now. But, if you don't stop sighing and just say what you wanna say already, I will kick you out of here." At that, he couldn't help but to let out a soft chuckle. God, you loved his smile.

"I don't wanna upset you with this. Especially now. But, I guess, I just would have liked to be the one they called." Seeing the instant frown you made, he clarified: "Not as your partner. As your boyfriend."

You had to admit that, even though you knew going public with your relationship was something Jay thought a lot about, you weren't expecting him to say that at all. Not at that moment, at least. And, being the not-so-calm person you were, the conversation quickly took a turn.

"What the hell? I just got back from the worst moment of my life and you wanna use that- pry on that to pressure me into going public?" God, that was harsh. You knew as soon as the words left your mouth. You regretted it as soon as the words left your mouth. But you didn't dare to open it again, as you watched his face go from hurt to annoyance and then a hint of anger.

"You're kidding, right?" You didn't answer. "Please, tell me you're kidding?"

"Babe, I'm-"

"You're what? You're sorry? Because, man, that shit you just said? That hurt!" He stood there in silence for a moment before continuing: "do you have any idea of what these past days were like for me? You think I'm bringing this up now just because I wanna shout to everyone that you're my girlfriend? Claim you as mine or whatever bullshit reason you think I have for wanting to go public?” You still couldn’t say anything, so he went on, “well, it's not any of that. I'm talking about this because you were missing for two entire fucking days that felt like forever to me, but I couldn't tell anyone how I'd die if anything happened to you because, hey! I was respecting your wishes! I felt guilty about the operation and thought that the least I could do was keep my pain all to myself. Which is kinda funny because you're always telling me not to bottle up my emotions!" By then you were crying, just because you were too mad at yourself for making him feel like that, and he paused but only to take a breath: "But, you know that all of that wasn't even what hurt the most? The worst part was when I got a text from Burgess on the chat group saying that they'd found you and had taken you to Med, but that we could continue doing our surveillance on one of the offenders because Kev was already on the way there!" He shouted this time, which made you wince a little — even though he looked more hurt than angry, really. Running his hands through his hair, Jay completed: "and, now, that I'm finally able to be with you- to- to know for myself that you're okay! You suggest that I was-" He couldn't even finish the sentence, which showed even more just how distraught he truly was. "I guess I just- I just can't believe that you don't see that all I wanna do is be here. With you. Taking care of you. Which is all I wish I could’ve done at the hospital, too…"

"I know, Jay." You whispered with a weak voice. Unsure that he'd heard you, you tried it a bit louder: "I know, Jay. And, trust me, I am so sorry for what I said! I don't- I just… I just wish it didn't have to be this complicated…" You knew what that sounded like. And, God, you were terrified about it. How could not you find anything good enough to say?

"Maybe I shouldn't be saying this… Maybe I shouldn't be trying anymore…” Because it sure looks like you gave it up, he wanted to add, "but I- I need to at least ask. Why does it have to be so complicated?"

"Jay, babe-"

"No! Don't do that! Don't try and stall me with that soft tone! I just wanna know why!"

"You know why, Jay!"

"I don't! I really don't! Or have you forgotten that all you did so far was give me half-ass excuses about privacy and being shy?"

"Okay! You wanna know why?" You half-asked, half-barked at him, "it's because I am scared of what will happen! That's why! Throughout all of my career, I've had to prove myself, then I got this sort of arranged job at Intelligence which not only threw all of my hard work to hell but, also, never lets me rest because it never really feels like I'm a part of that so-called family you guys have! And Voight? Every single day I still feel like he's testing me! Giving me the silliest assignments and being overly mad whenever I get the lead on a case! But, somehow — as messed up as it may sound —, I don't wanna lose that job! I don't wanna risk going back to the unit I came from, where I was constantly harassed and intimidated!" You blurted it all out, only stopping to take a breath while Jay simply stood there looking completely shocked. "And you, Jay, as great as you are — and you're literally the best thing that's ever happened to me —, you can very easily put all of that at risk." Now it was your turn to sigh. You could only hope that you sounded as defeated as you felt: having to give up the guy who was probably the love of your life just to not go from one toxic work environment back to an even more toxic one. Your mouth tasted sour after that realization, which just made you remember how sweet Jay's always was.

"You never told me any of that." He muttered quietly, pulling you out of your thoughts.

"I know and I'm sorry. I just… Thought it would get better. Eventually."

"You know I could have helped, right?" He stated sadly, then adding with a shred of hope: "You know… Maybe I still can?"

"Jay… Let's just not make this harder. Please."

"Just hear me out for a second: you are a part of our family." At that you just scoffed and looked the other way, making him pull your chin to connect your eyes again. "You are. I said I was going crazy with you missing but they all were too, including Voight."

"Yeah, right."

"It's true! Why would I lie to you about this? He looked truly haunted and, if I'm being honest, I think he just hoped he wouldn't get too close to you, to keep his head on straight in case something like this ever happened." He gulped harshly before continuing, "in case something worse happened. I think he simply can't handle losing anyone else, (y/n/n)."

"Y- you really think that?" You asked him and, you'd be lying if you said that you didn't get just a little hopeful.

"I do, darling," he told you in a soft tone. "And I'm not making excuses for him here or anything, okay? I'm just tryna tell you that we can deal with Voight. We can deal with rumors. I swear I will fucking kill anyone who dares to even touch your name on that stupid department!"

"Jay!" You started to reprehend again, even though you knew that he was just trying to lighten the mood. "That is exactly the kind of stuff you can't even think about doing after we go public!" You told him while spatting his arm.

"Ouch! Wait a second, did you really just say after we go public?" The way his eyes twinkled at that moment was enough to get you to agree with anything he wanted, really.

"But, hey! Don't get all exci-" You couldn't finish your sentence as he had already swept you off your feet and started kissing you all over. It hurt a little, due to your bruises, but it's not like you actually gave a damn about it.

"Don't get excited? Lady, I'm already over the moon!" He told you with the biggest smile you’d ever seen.

“Oh, God. You look so damn cute right now!! I can’t believe that I-” You cut yourself off because your voice started to crack while a big amount of sorrowful tears rolled down your cheeks. Seeing you like that, once more, made Jay start panicking a little, scared that maybe you were backing down on your relationship again.

“Baby? What’s wrong? Talk to me, please, (y/n/n).” Hearing the confusion in his plead sort of brought you back to say:

“I- I just can’t believe that I said the things I said to you! I hurt you! I hurt you in the kind of way I was scared you were you gonna get hurt when it seemed like I was gonna-”

“Don’t you dare complete that sentence, okay?!?” He half-asked, half-begged you, letting on so much heartbreak, “first of all: nothing could have ever hurt me in the way you being gone did. No matter how hard you might have tried, you just wouldn’t be able to get there, girl.” He said more casually, shrugging his shoulders in a way that made you crack a small smile. “And, second: I don’t want you thinking about me, in any way, when you're out there in the field. You just can't, love."

"I know, but at that moment, I-"

"Look, princess, you need to promise me that you will try your best to never do that again, okay? Because if you do, if the people we chase see any weaknesses they'll take advantage of it. And, then... But I know it's hard. You're the first thing on my mind whenever something goes south too, but I just- I love you too much to face the idea of losing you! So you need to promise me that you will keep your head one hundred percent focused on whatever is at hand, please, babe!" He begged you with such urgency in his voice that new tears started rolling down your already marked face.

"Oh, Jay... I love you, too, okay? More than anything in the world! But you know that, when we're in that kinda moment, our minds sometimes just wonder..." Seeing his concerned expression, you decided to add: "However, if you promise me you'll try your best to focus on your work, in the same way, I'll promise it too." At that, he gave you a cheeky smile.

"Deal. Now let's get you in bed cause it's been a long couple of days, detective." He said, picking you up one more time and carrying you to your bedroom.

"Oh my God! Jay, put me down!!" You squealed out, though you didn't really want him to put you down, ever.

[dreamescapeswriting]

Guardian Angel ~MYG [Request]

WORD COUNT: 1.8k

GENRE: angst, fluffy ending, Helping Yoongi after his surgery, him finally appreciating your relationship together

PAIRING: yoongi x fem!reader

A/N: I hope this is okay for you my love!

"Do you have any idea how irritating you are?!" Yoongi cried out as he threw his good arm back to make you let go of him. You sighed at him as you held the jacket in your hand, staring at him as you waited for him to get over his small temper tantrum and let you finish dressing him. 

"Going out for a walk was your idea, I'm just trying to help-"

"I don't fucking need your help!" He yelled as he stared at you, his face red with anger as he shook his head at you. Mumbling something to himself as he tried to pull the jacket from your hands but you weren't going to let go of it. 

"Yoongi you're supposed to be taking it easy, let me help you," You knew he felt bad about having to rely on you and the boys for things so you weren't going to hold the yelling against him. You stepped forward to help but this only seemed to anger him more as he stepped away from you and began yelling all over again. Raising his voice so loud that you were sure the neighbours were going to call your landlord again to complain. 

"You have no fucking idea, do you?! Do you know how useless I fucking feel! Having to get my girlfriend to run around for me like I'm so stupid I can't dress myself?!" This time when he threw his arm back in frustration he knocked over a vase of flowers, the glass smashing onto the floor as he stormed away from you.

"I'm just trying-"

"Well don't! Stop trying! I'm sick of you breathing down my neck! Everywhere I turn you're there and it's too much!" He continued to yell out insults as you cleaned up the glass from the floor, sweeping it all up into the dustpan as you tried to get every last piece. 

"Watch where you're stepping, you could cut your foot." You told him as you guided him out of the way, 

"See! There you go again! Treating me like I'm a baby!" He yelled out in frustration, glaring down at you as he shook his head. 

"You're everywhere I turn! Why are you even here?! Why aren't you at work?!" You ignored him as you swept up more of the glass, letting him get on with whatever it was he was saying to you. Trying to drown it out since you knew he didn't mean any of it.

"So fucking annoying," As soon as the last one left his mouth you picked up the broken glass and headed into the kitchen, slamming the door so you didn't have to listen to him anymore. Breaking down as soon as you sat down on the floor beside the bin. All you'd been trying to do these last few months was make sure he could have the best healing time. The doctors and boys were counting on you, wanting you to make sure that Yoongi healed nicely and he was throwing it back in your face.

"He's going to be fine Y/n," Namjoon reassured you as you watched Yoongi being wheeled into his hospital room. He'd just come back up from the surgery on his shoulder and he was still out from the medication that they'd given to him. The boys were all waiting with you from the moment that Yoongi went down, none of them wanted you or Yoongi to be alone while he went through this. It was only a small surgery but something that could drastically change his career if it went wrong so the boys were all waiting for answers.

"You'll look after him right, Noona?" Jungkook asked as he looked over at you, you looked to Namjoon who was already waiting for you to answer the maknae. 

"Of course, I've taken some time off work so I can help with him," You'd already spoken to Namjoon. He thought it was the better option since all of the boys were going to be busy during the healing period. 

"I'll be right there with him," You whispered, looking over at Yoongi in his room ready to go into him when his doctor began to walk towards you and the boys.

"The surgery went perfectly, he'll be fine as long as he rests it. He's going to need a lot of time off to heal. Someone will need to be there every step he takes," His doctor told you as he walked down to you and Namjoon, you were the ones down as Yoongi's emergency contacts on all his forms. 

"I'd expect you'll be looking after him?" You nodded at the doctor and he nodded behind him to his office, ready to go over everything you would need to know on how to look after Yoongi and make sure he made the best recovery.

It felt like it had been forever since you and Yoongi had spoken to one another despite him just being in the other room, he was staring out of the window at the rain while you stayed in the kitchen trying to do anything except going into there and talk to him. It was blown out of proportion, both of your emotions were riding high since you'd been stuck together for so long. Lockdown and the surgery both playing a part in Yoongi's mindset. Looking back on it Yoongi knew it was a stupid thing to do when you were just doing what you were told to do but it didn't make him feel any less upset about it. For the last two months, you'd done nothing but hover around him as if he was about to break at any given moment and it was starting to get on his nerves. You were constantly asking him what he wanted you to do for him. Never letting him do anything on his own. No matter where he was you were there breathing down the back of his neck waiting to help him. He knew he was supposed to be thankful for it since you were the one person who was looking after him after his surgery but it just made him feel bad. It made him feel as though he couldn't do anything for himself and it built up inside of him until the point where he snapped at you and now neither of you were talking.

When he heard you moving he turned around to look at you, your head was down as you walked into the bathroom, ignoring him even though he hadn't said anything. Yoongi knew that even if he tried to say something you'd stay silent and lock yourself away from him and he couldn't blame you. The whole time you'd done nothing but make sure Yoongi was healing perfectly, he remembered everything you did for him. Cooking, cleaning, helping him in the shower or baths, making sure he could watch the boys preforming and being there for him when he got upset about not being able to be there with them.

The temperature in the bath was perfect and you looked at Yoongi who was standing in the doorway, 

"Thanks," He whispered as he watched you, he'd gotten home four days ago and it was finally time that he could have a bath with the stitches in. 

"The doctor said it'll be fine, as long as we don't soak the stitches," You told him as you moved the shower curtain out of the way so he could get into the bathtub easier. 

"Will you get in with me?" He laughed as he began to kick off his boxers, waiting for you to help him with his shirt. He wasn't allowed to lift his arm up by himself, he needed someone to steady it for him while he changed or did anything that required using that arm. 

"You want me to?" You giggled as you saw the blush creeping onto his cheeks, nodding his head as he watched you. 

"Then sure," You whispered, waiting for him to get into the water before you would join him in the water. Stripping out of your clothes as soon as he was in the tub and climbing into the tub in front of him. 

Even when he knew how tired you were, you were always there to make sure he had everything that he needed. All those times he would wake up in the dead of night in pain you would instantly wake up and stay awake with him so he didn't have to go through it all alone. He knew how much begging and pleading with your boss it had taken to manage to get the time off just to look after him and there he was throwing it back at you when all you were doing was being nice and doing as you were told. It was as if you were his one and only guardian angel, always there to look after him and he adored you for it. Even if he hadn't shown it and then yelled at you for being in the way when he was really just upset at himself for everything. Staring over at the bathroom door as he heard the shower running so he made his way over and tapped on the door softly. 

"Y-Your tablets are on the table with some tea," You stuttered out and Yoongi instantly knew you were crying in there so he knocked again without a word. The door slowly opening to reveal you standing there, tears rolling down your cheeks with bloodshot eyes. 

"Are you in pain? I can get the stronger painkillers-" You stopped talking as Yoongi wrapped his good arm around your waist and held onto you tightly. Kissing your shoulder as he held you, tears streaming harder down your face as you hugged him back. Relaxing against his embrace as you let go of every emotion you'd been feeling for the last couple of weeks. 

"I'm sorry I yelled and said things I didn't mean...I-I'm tired and annoyed at myself," He whispered as he pulled back to look at you, reaching up to rub the tears away from your face, smiling weakly as you locked eyes with him he was going to keep saying sorry for as long as he took.

"We're both tired," You whimpered as you kissed his lips softly, trying to remind yourself that he didn't mean it and you knew it. The two of you had been having a lot of broken sleep so it was getting to you too much. 

"You should take your meds, come on..." You whispered, pulling him in the direction of the kitchen but Yoongi stopped you. 

"I'll take them, go and have a long bubble bath...I'll order some food?" You nodded at him, the idea of a nice hot bubble bath and take-out food sounded like the perfect combination right now. 

"Then we'll curl up on the sofa and watch a movie until we fall asleep," He promised you as he looked at you, raising your hand to his lips and leaving a small kiss on it.

Tagline: @lyoongx​ @mitzwinchester​ @fan-ati--c​ @rjsmochii​ @kneel-begyourpardon​ @taestannie​ @innersooya​ @sw33tnight​ @sweeneyblue1​ @acciocriativity​ @that-anxious-bisexual​

[diary-of-deadweight]

Masterlist.

Fic Idea by @leximills666

“Anything new?” You asked, sitting yourself in the spare chair between Darcy and Jimmy, who handed you your cup of caffeine. “If you consider Pietro teaching the twins how to stream snacks from the kitchen then no.” Jimmy spoke up, his eyes glued intently to the television for any missable details that could play in your favour. “But Jimmy did almost spill coffee onto Director Hayward.” Darcy shoots the mortified male a amused look as you slapped a hand onto his shoulder, trying so hard not to burst out laughing at the mental image that gave you an good amount of serotonin, “I’d pay good money to see you actually do it, serves him right for calling my friend a terroist.”

It was common knowledge that you and the Maximoff twins were close friends after their introduction to the Avengers as you were gaining some semblance of understanding of your teleportation powers and it’s limitations before trauma bonding with the pair over being Hydras successful lab rats. So when Hayward slagged off Wanda it took Darcy, Monica and Jimmy to hold you back from ending his whole career John Wick style. The bastard got real lucky but you couldn’t promise that the next time was going to have him leave a briefing room without a few bruises and even bruised ego. Fuelled by the frustration of recent events that left you feeling helpless as you were forced to watch the sitcom shenanigans Wanda and her dead yet somehow not dead husband and her adorable twins get into that only made it feel like a horror after they end, leaving you with more questions then answers that weighed on your darkening eyebags and breaking every last ounce of paitience you once thought you had along with the sleepless nights of theorising that went nowhere without someone bringing up a flaw made keeping your powers in check a little more difficult that you’d scare Jimmy, Darcy and Monica on a plethora of occasions.

You just wanted to get them out and be done with Hayward’s suspicious ass. I mean it was clear as fuck that vision was in bits and pieces in the video servalence footage. What was he doing with him? Why did he wait this long to show everyone something that would’ve benefited the opertation from the beginning? THAT was suspicious behaviour and yet no one was gonna question it?! Gotta love corruption I guess. “Anything new Dr Lewis?” Speaking of corruption, here it was in human form standing behind you there with his ‘stick up his ass’ attitude; it really pissed you off that you’d love nothing more then to slam your fist into him punchable bitch face until it’s unreagnisable. Sensing your hatred and thirst for violence, Jimmy places a hand on your shoulder and gave you a stern look that read ‘no...not yet at least.’ Sighing you gave him a passable smile before talking a long sip of coffee, making sure to slurp annoyingly loud as possible when Hayward looked at you unamused that you couldn’t help retaliating with a tight lipped smile and the middle finger. Darcy had to cover her mouth from bursting out in hysterics while Jimmy sighed like a disappointed parent but you knew he was trying to hold it together internally as Darcy was. “Nothing worth reporting back on sir.”

Hayward didn’t say anything other then let out a grunt then making his way out of the room not without a snarky comment from you of course, “don’t let the door hit you on the way out directior” to which he replied with as swiftly “appreciate the concern (l/n).” Making sure he was out of sight Darcy burst out laughing so hard she had to lean against you for support while Jimmy allowed himself to chuckle a little had your chest warming up, erasing any forms of pent up frustration like magic. Spending time with these beautiful bastards were what made the sleepless nights worth it in your opinion, knowing that you weren’t alone in wanting to help Wanda instead of harm. “What’re they laughing at?” Monica asked, a dazzling smile adorned her face as she nursed her own coffee between her hands; You shrugged nonchalantly looking back at her with fake innocence that told her more then she needed to know. “The sleep deprivation must’ve caught up to them.”

“Shut up!” The dark haired woman nudged you in the side, almost spilling your coffee in the process, “(y/n) threw some serious sass at Hayward earlier, should’ve been there Monica it was hysterical.” Monica only laughed in response as she patted you on the back, proud that she wasn’t the only one sick of Hayward’s shit, “I guess I should’ve. Would make a great memeory to share in the future” she sat in the chair next to Darcy turning her attention to the screen where Pietro was attempting to be slick and nab a snack while Wanda was cutting onions unflinchingly, only to slip and land flat on his back scaring Wanda as the unseen audicene laughed. Stupid and as cheesy as it was it didn’t fail to make you crack a smile while reminiscing of a similar memory that stuck out like a sore thumb. You and Pietro thought it be a great idea to compete against one another in order to see who’d get to the kitchen first, spoiler: he won by a narrow margin, that still had you calling him a cheat to this day, and decided to hide from you behind the counter like the little shit that he was. Long story short you entered the kitchen thinking you won, he jumps out scaring you so badly that you end up teleporting ontop of him.

“Hey (y/n).” Darcy’s voice brought you back from your thoughts and to reality. The thought of teleporting in there and getting your friends out has been a recurring one though your required to feel someone’s energy signature and with how well getting inside visuals went the likelihood of you sensing Pietro or Wanda for that case wasn’t going to be a piece of cake if it was you’d already have done it by now. “Yes Dr Lewis?” “Think you could-“ teleport inside? Trust me I’ve thought the same thing but the barrier is a major issue standing in my way of actually getting inside and out without trouble.” Despite all odds that didn’t stop you from wanting to give it a try if it meant trapping yourself also you wouldn’t hesitate to do it in a heartbeat. So it took your friends aback when you abruptly stood up from your chair, shoving your coffee into Jimmy’s hands and made a mad dash out of the room and down the corridor unapologetically shoving everyone aside with Monica and Darcy in hot pursuit while poor Jimmy placed your coffee down by your chair and bolted in hopes of catching up but when he did you were already teleported into the barrier that was dragging you into Westview before their eyes.

“(Y/n)!!!!” Monica yelled as she ran towards you, hand outstretched to pull you back but only grasped air when you disappeared form sight, she was so close to saving you but was too late non the less. Darcy and Jimmy shared a look as they came to her side as the feeling of helplessness became more evident within them. “Come on Monica, we can probably catch them on the television.” She said solemnly as they walked back to base.

-meanwhile in Westview-

Scared and confused you found yourself wandering aimlessly down the streets in your new attire of plaid shirt, leather jacket, high waisted trousers, converse and a locket that help a picture of you, Pietro and Wanda inside before finding yourself on your ass looking up at a silver haired male in a black leather jacket, Hawaiian shirt, jeans and worn down sneakers.

“What the-,” his chocolate eyes widened as they landed on your face, “(y/n)?! Is that you?!” His voice was just as you remembered it you smirked, outstreching a hand in a silent jesture to be helped up, “you think I’d let you wander too far?” He chuckled, hauling you off the floor and into his arms, face buried into his neck savouring the brunt sugar smell you’ve missed so much. “I should’ve guessed you’d be several steps behind.” He whispered into your hair, placing a kiss there, immediately comforting you before pulling away to drag you down the street without explanation towards a familiar house that belonged to the auburn haired female who was currently cleaning up after her kids when she saw Pietro, giving him that parental stare. “You’re a bad influence on my kids Pietro, you’re lucky to be my brother or I would’ve blasted across town by now.”

‘Well that ain’t foreboding at all.’ You thought to yourself as you took in the fact that you were finally reunited with the people who meant the most to you, you couldn’t remember when you got here nor how other then the fact that you wanted to visit Pietro and Wanda and that you could teleport. “If it’s any constellation, look who finally decided to pay us a visit.” The silver haired male stepped aside to reveal you in all your unsure glory as Wanda’s eyes widened like they did with Pietro but she didn’t any waste time in running towards you and holding your face in her hands, tears lining her eyes and you couldn’t help but lean into her warmth. “(Y/n)?” She whispered softly. “Hi Wanda, sorry I’m late.” You said as Pietro held both of you close to his chest protectively while Wanda laughed weakly her hand dropping you grasp yours tightly, “all is forgiven now that we’re together...as we should be.” Her eyes flashed red for a split second.

“Yeah, together at last.”

[marktuansvevo]

got7 reacts to something theyve never experienced before in a relationship

warning(s); slight cursing, sexual content in bam’s part

mark; being jealous

mark understood why his past partners could be jealous of him in his line of work. as long as it didn’t get out of hand, he thought it was cute. he was never the jealous one in the relationship. he didn’t even know what jealousy felt like....

....until tonight.

you were mark’s entire world. you excited him, you built him up like no other. never before could he see himself spending his life with someone before you came along. you made the world brighter to him.

but now he was only seeing red. 

you had been a trainee and never debuted, which you weren’t too upset about, you had a boyfriend you loved and a career with less physical and time demands than being in the entertainment industry. this meant that you knew a lot of other bands, stray kids being one of them. chan was, quite frankly, your best friend during your trainee days, so when you saw him at this afterparty you were attending with mark, you threw yourself into his arms.

mark just watched you from afar.

and his blood boiled.

chan spun you around in his arms, the biggest smile on his stupid, handsome face. “yah!! y/n! mark didn’t say you’d be here.”

you giggled, trying to keep your tears at bay. you put your hands on his face, poking his dimples. mark scoffed at the blush that was forming on his friend’s face. “god, chan i missed you so much.”

“bro, you look constipated,” bam snuck up behind him. “dude, your face is so red right now.”

mark rolled his eyes. “these parties are so annoying.” he didn’t take his eyes off of you as you caught up with chan, who still had his hand around your waist.

bam followed his line of vision. “shit, you’re not constipated, you’re jealous. yugyeom, come look at him!”

mark walked away from his intoxicated friends and up to you. you smiled at him before returning to your conversation with chan. 

“y/n, we have to go,” mark said lowly, smiling a sickly fake smile at chan, who immediately dropped his hand from your waist. 

“why, baby, we just got here? are you not feeling good?” you asked. he wanted to feel bad, your voice was laced with concern.

“something like that. see you, chan.”

as you got in the car, you smiled at him, poking his cheek. “somebody’s jealous, huh?”

“huh? of chan? i don’t know what you’re talking about,” he clenched his jaw, not making eye contact with you as he steered his car out of the parking lot. you were giggling now.

“you’re cute when you’re jealous. maybe i should make more time for chan.”

“y/n!!!”

jaebeom; wearing disguises in public

jaebeom never thought he would have to dress up in a disguise to go out in public. and jae would never want to put you in such a position. it was draining, and you, as his girlfriend knew that he despised it.

but you wanted to go to a concert with him.

and you wanted to stand in the pit with him and be part of it. don’t get you wrong, you loved when he bought you suite seats or could watch his shows from backstage, but you wanted to sway to ariana grande in th pit with your boyfriend.

“cmon, jae, i think everyone is going to be paying attention to ari. we can skip the opening act?” you suggested.

“y/n, i don’t want to take a chance...im sorry,” he pouted at you. you sighed, trying to figure out what to do.

“what about disguises?” he said. “like, we could wear our halloween costumes?” you were giggling to yourself, but your boyfriend seemed like the idea.

“i could wear my jesus wig and you could paint a beard on me?” he said with serious eyes.

“jae, you hate going out in disguises.”

“true...but, babe, this will be fun. you could wear your sailor mars wig, it’d be cute,”

okay, this was a really cute idea and you were warming up to it...if it made your boyfriend more comfortable to be out in a crowd of so many people, you were down to try it out.

“this really feels like halloween in july,” you giggled as you used mascara to draw a beard on his chin.

“do I look like jesus??” he asked childishly.

“well, you don’t look like im jaebeom of got7, that’s for sure,”

“you look like an egirl,” he laughed at himself. “don’t hate, you know you love it,” you said. “we look so cute, let’s take a mirror selfie and post in later,”

“no, then people will be on to us,” your boyfriend sent a pout in your direction as he looked at his makeshift beard in the mirror. “I look sexy as fuck in a beard,”

“super sexy aegyo please?”

the two of you arrived at the arena, not be noticed by anyone, but jae was still on edge, so you held his hand tight as you made your way into the pit.

“im so excited!!” you shouted over the noise. he shook his head before leaning in to kiss you. the two of you danced the whole night away to arianas crooning, his arms around you as you swayed to her pretty, soothing voice. the two of you let the world fade away while ariana sang honeymoon ave in the background.

jackson; his significant other saying ily first.

it was no secret that jackson was stock full of love and kindness. he had had other partners before you, all with him ending up getting too attached, or scaring them away when he said “I love you” too early.

he did not want to scare you away, and honestly, he had known he loved you two months into dating, but he didn’t want to scare you away, so he never outwardly said those three little words to you.

he wasn’t expecting you to say it, first though.

you had invited him over for dinner and a movie, just wanting a chill night in with your boyfriend. he brought the wine and promised to give you a back massage, so really, what more could you want on this chilly thursday night?

“what’s been going on, honey? you know you can tell me anything,” jackson whispered into your ear as he helped you out of your clothes.

“I feel like I deserve to oversee my department at work. i have the most education of all of them, more experience than them, and generally, I am more optimistic than my superiors….,” you sighed, letting him rub just under your shoulder blades, which had been itching all week.

“mmm?”

“i think they might be scared of powerful women who like to wear hot pink fendi suits to work,” you smiled, knowing he would be offended at your joke. you could almost feel him pouting.

“so the reason you can’t get the job is because your superiors don’t like the suits your boyfriend buys you? wow, what a way to hurt a guy’s pride…,” he followed your lead on the joke, trying to make you laugh because he knew this was really getting to you. “baby, I think you should go to their boss and see if you can get a promotion…tell them everything you told me, okay? i know you’re not only the best woman for the job, but the best person for the job…period,” he said, making you feel so overwhelmed with emotion. none of your previous partners had ever revered you the way jackson had. you felt so incredibly blessed and in love, you couldn’t help yourself.

“god, jackson, I love you so much,” you whispered.

the movement of his soft hands on your back stopped abruptly at your words. ‘oh god, was it too early to say that?’

“j-jackson…im sorry-“

“ive been waiting to say that to you,” he breathed against your lips, closing the distance that was between them.

“jackson wang….you love me?” you could feel the tears building. the man of your dreams was in love with you, too.

“i love you,” he whispered reverently.

“say it again,” you begged. he said it like a mantra.

“i love you, i love you….i love you..”

jinyoung; moving in together

jinyoung thought you were so cute. you were ecstatic to move with jinyoung. you had been living in your shared apartment with your mom your whole life and we’re excited to start a new chapter of your life. jinyoung didn’t think you were taking in the fact that moving is one of the most stressful things a person can go through.

he didn’t want to rain on your parade, though.

the two of you got settled into your new apartment after a long day of unpacking. jinyoung kissed you as you laid onto your new king sized bed. “im gonna grab takeout, you want your usual?” he asked sweetly, squeezing your hand. you just nodded, squeezing his hand back.

you watched as jinyoung walked out of your shared bedroom. that’s when the dam broke. you were so overwhelmed. you didn’t know how to make warm water happen in your shower, you didn’t have your wifi set up, and you forgot your favorite teddy bear at your moms. you missed teddy and your wifi and your mom.

“hey, i ordered you two egg rolls and they gave us three - hey, baby, are you crying?”

“no,” you replied lamely. “I miss teddy,” you wailed miserably.

“teddy...the...stuffed bear?” he asked.

“i slept with him every night for the past 20 something years.”

“baby...we can get your bear in the morning...,”

“we don’t have netflix set up so how am i supposed to sleep tonight?”

“y/n...,” he chuckled. you frowned harder now that he was laughing at you. “moving isn’t as exciting as it looks. tomorrow, we will fix the wifi, okay? and we can visit your mom and rescue teddy.”

“okay...okay. im sorry, im just a bit overwhelmed,” you confessed.

“its gonna be okay, honey. it’s a lot to take in, i know. but you can hold me instead of teddy, and ill sing you to sleep,” he whispered, the takeout now long forgotten. before you could fall asleep, he pulled his iphone out of his back pocket and pulled you into his chest to take a selfie. “there. now we have a picture of us in our bed for the first time.”

“i love you, you sap.”

even though you called him the sap, the next day you went to the pharmacy to get the photo printed and frame it. when jinyoung came home from the market that day, he eyed the frame on your bed stand, smirking at you.

“oh, so im the sap, hmm?”

youngjae; picking up the tab

it was the first date the two of you had been on since youngjae had been on tour. he told you to get dressed up and that the two of you would go out for a fancy dinner and catch up on everything. this is why you loved him, because while you wanted to hear all about his stories of life and tour abroad, he always wanted to hear about everything that was going at home, to see if you were alright.

youngjae looked dazzling in a black checked suit, while you matched him with a little black dress that made him groan when you stepped out of the bathroom. “can we skip dinner?” he’d ask cheekily. you rolled your eyes at him before kissing him on the cheek. “we aren’t skipping dinner, and we definitely won’t be skipping dessert,” you winked before leading him to the car.

the two of you ate dinner together, him holding your hand and looking at you with stars in his eyes as you told him stories that had happened while he was away. you ordered appetizers, drinks, shared an entrée, and youngjae even ordered you a slice of apple pie for the two of you to share.

“baby, I’m going to go use the restroom,” youngjae said before kissing your hand. “’kay, don’t get mugged, please,” you teased him. he shook his head at your playfulness. you watched as he left before frantically waving your arms at your waitress. she ran over to you, checking if you were alright.

“I just wanted to wonder if I can pick up the cheque really quick? I wanted to pick it up for my boyfriend as a surprise,” you spoke in a hushed tone, making the waitress giggle. she nodded her head before handing it to her. you handed her your credit card, thanking her before your boyfriend had any suspicions of what you were up to.

youngjae came out of the bathroom as soon as the waitress set the cheque down. you were applying your lipstick so you couldn’t snatch it in time. you watched as his pretty brown eyes scanned the receipt, looking confused as ever. “is this a joke? what kind of waitress lets the girlfriend pay?”

“jae,” you giggled. “you don’t always have to pay for dinner. I wanted to treat you…I missed you so much,” you confided, watching his expression from anger into warmth.

“oh, thank you honey, you are so sweet and thoughtful, I love you so much,” you let him wrap his suit jacket around your arms before planting a kiss to your forehead. “but that will be the last time you ever do that.”

“shut up, i like doing nice things for you,” you pouted.

“since you paid for dinner tonight, i have to put out, right?”

he ran to the car before you could slap him in the chest.

bam; his s/o borrowing his clothes

remember how joey never shared his food? well that’s how bam was with his wardrobe. he was very particular about his clothing, not letting people borrow them at all. yugyeom used to steal his clothes just to be petty and piss his best friend off. he had never let past partners borrow his clothes, and nothing was going to change, it wasn’t his fault, it was an obsession. if you were sure of one thing, it was to not steal your boyfriends clothes.

but one day, while he was gone from work, you thought you would take pictures of yourself in only one of his blazers to tease him.

you weren’t expecting him to walk through the door while you were trying to take self timer pictures of yourself.

“baby? what are you doing?” bam asked, laughing as you let out a squeal of surprise.

“i..i wanted to surprise you...,” he tsked, pulling away to look at his blazer. “i know you don’t like me wearing your things..,” you stammered as he circled you.

“you have such pretty things, though, bam,”

“you look so sexy in this,” he purred. “you were trying to get me worked up while im trying to work?”

“u...uhhh,” you couldn’t think coherently with you boyfriend acting so domineering. you gasped as he slid his hand up to your cunt, rubbing your clit in little circles. “bam...please...,” you groaned. 

“keep the blazer on,” he said as you writhed in his grip.

“its gonna get all sweaty though and then you’ll yell at me,” you teased him as you followed him to the bed. 

bam just groaned. “baby, im sorry I haven’t let you borrow my clothes before but you look better in them than me. now, let me fuck you and i promise you can have anything you want in that closet.”

he knew exactly how to shut you up.

yugyeom; his s/o buying him flowers

yugyeom was always so stressed during comeback season. you always scolded him when he forgot to eat, or wasn’t staying hydrated enough, but you were so proud of him. seeing the smile on his face and the way he walked a little taller was so worth it.

he was still busy during comeback season, coming home late after all the videos he had to shoot for publicity.

one night, yugyeom had gotten home around midnight to a bouquet of pink roses and a handwritten note from you. it read; “I am so proud of you, my love. congrats on breath… I can always feel your love,” he blushed and giggled to himself, thinking, “isn’t the guy supposed to buy the girlfriend the flowers?” he wandered into your shared bedroom to see you sprawled into his side, with your book in your hands, a soft snore leaving your lips. he nudged you, not intending to wake you up, he could thank you in the morning. but he did accidentally. “yeom?” you whispered. 

“shh, baby go back to sleep,” he shushed, changing into his pjs. 

“did you like the flowers?” you asked, suddenly awake now. 

“theyre really pretty, baby, but aren’t I supposed to buy you the flowers?” 

you narrowed your eyes at him. “not my boyfriend being a sexist,” 

“yah! y/n stop it, I didn’t mean it that way!! I love them, you remembered I said I love roses,” he was pouting now, pulling you into his chest to spoon you. his voice got quieter now. “no one’s ever remembered my favorite flowers…much less bought them for me,” he paused, kissing the back of your neck before closing his eyes and falling fast asleep.

he was whipped.

[2jaeh]

IDOL  l  NA JAEMIN DRABBLE

genre: angst, fluff, suggestive theme

idol! Jaemin ,  gf!reader

You don’t know how much longer you can be Jaemin’s girlfriend hidden in the spotlight.

——————————————————————————-

“I think you have to leave” you muttered coldly as Jaemin’s hand dropped from your shoulder, his heart sinking after hearing those words escape your mouth. 

“Can’t..can’t we just talk about it y/n....At Least give me a reason as to why-“ 

“I just can’t do this anymore Jaemin, your lifestyle, the uncertainty...” you choked on your words, you promised yourself who wouldn’t cry in front of him. 

“Y-you think I don’t love you? Is that it?” Jaemin’s eyes were filled with tears at this point, unable to grasp his feelings, “h-how can you say that, you don’t have the right to say that!” 

Jaemin reached for your hand once more and you shrugged him off and ran over to your bedroom, locking yourself away from him, away from this conversation. 

It’s been a few long months of dating an idol and it’s something you wished you had never done. Every month was worse than the last, reading through his interviews of answering questions about his love life that his fans were always curious about. But it was one in particular that had you in the state you were right now. 

Earlier on you switched on YouTube to catch up with Dream’s latest interview and of course one of the fans asked them would they reveal their partners later on in their life. 

Jaemin being Jaemin gave his usual response, “I’m already dating czennies!” He grinned which made you smile, he was always making sure he fed into the fan service but then the questions persisted to the point of Jaemin looking visibly uncomfortable. 

He hid behind a smile but you could see the pain in his eyes as he tried his best to please his fans but at the same time not disappoint you, knowing you’d be watching this specific interview. 

You felt guilty, knowing you’d always be at the back of his mind during his idol life, like a burden that he had to carry around, not knowing if and when he’d be free from it. 

He got home from the interview and mumbled a ‘sorry’ and you felt lightheaded. You could see the toll it had on him but you had played your part too. You had to meet him secretly, not let any of your friends know about your relationship and have to watch him over and over deny dating rumors or be involved with dating rumors with other idols. 

It was unfair. At the end of the day he’d be the one who’d still receive love and support from his fans and you had to move on with your life in secret. 

“Let’s just end this, I can’t do this anymore” you had told him, unable to make eye contact with him. 

“What ? Why?” He panicked, Jaemin felt a knot develop in his stomach as that sentence played over and over again in his head. 

Jaemin leaned against the door as he heard your sobs from the other side, wishing he could hold you and let you know that he loved you, he always has and he always will. 

“Jaemin please go....” 

“Okay y/n” he pressed his lips together and dragged his feet down the hallway and out of your apartment. 

Each word made your heart ache and your own worry for him began to sit in when you noticed fans had been noticing his absence from social media and promotions. The company had put out a vague message of Jaemin just contracting the flu and he needed to rest but the fans knew this was unlike Jaemin who always did his best to update them on everything no matter what. 

“Dammit” you groaned one night when you saw an nct vlive pop up and every single member showed up except for Jaemin. 

“Dammit” you groaned one night when you saw an nct vlive pop up and every single member showed up except for Jaemin. 

You had to check on him, despite what was going on you cared about him a lot and needed to know he was okay. 

You grabbed your keys and headed over to the Dream dorms, punching in the entry code and stepped inside after what seemed like ages. You felt nervous walking around here again, chewing down on your lip as you stood in front of Jaemin’s door. 

You knocked softly and there was no response which made you turn the knob and enter his bedroom, noticing his curled up figure on the bed under his blankets. 

“I said I’m not going Mark...” he murmured and you took a seat on the bed beside him clearing your throat, “sweety it’s me.” 

Jaemin’s eyes shot open and he threw the covers off his body, staring at you curiously as if he wondered if his mind was playing tricks on him. 

“Y/n....what are you doing here?” Jaemin asked softly as he rubbed his reddened eyes. 

“I came to check up on you, you have everyone worried you know that?” 

“Yeah I guess” 

“Yeah you guess ? Did you forget about your fans ? Your members ?” You massaged your temples trying not to break down from the sight of him. 

Jaemin was in his classic black shirt and track pants, his black hair was a mess and his eye-bags and 5o’clock shadow were very prominent. 

He ran his hands through his hair and reached for your hand which you nervously allowed him to lace his fingers with yours. 

“I missed you” he said, looking down at his hands. 

“I missed you too Jaemin but your career is important, you can’t be doing things like this, a lot of people care about you” you replied. 

“...and I care about you y/n, how could I not see that I was putting you in pain”  Jaemin rested his head on your shoulder as you breathed in, not wanting the tears to escape from your eyes. You gently stroked his cheek as you heard his sniffle, Jaemin rarely cried in front of you, all of this was a lot to take in. 

“Listen,” Jaemin sat up and placed his hands on your shoulders, “I think im ready, I spoke to the managers, members and the higher ups some time back and they all told me that letting out the relationship will be okay”

“Jaemin…”

“y/n listen, you don't have to reveal your identity if you don't want to but I spoke to my fansite about it and she said the fans will be on board especially if i'm happy and healthy again” Jaemin’s glassy eyes searched your face for an answer. 

“I don't want to put you in an uncomfortable position” you responded softly. Your head was a mess trying to make sense of what he was trying to tell you. The biggest surprise was that everyone in his company supported him and it made you wonder if it was okay to agree with his decision. 

“I just can't afford to lose you y/n” Jaemin whispered, 

“Fine” Jaemins eyes lit up with your response and caressed your face in his hands.

“Yeah?” he hummed,

“Yeah lets do it.”

Jaemin pulled you into a long passionate kiss, it felt like electricity feeling his lips on yours after a long time. He quickly carried you onto his lap while keeping up the pace of this kiss, desperately squeezing different parts of your body. You finally broke the kiss trying to catch your breath when Jaemin pulled your sweater over your head and nipped away at the exposed skin as you moaned. 

“You’re missing out on a vlive right now because youre trying to fuck your girlfriend” you sighed as Jaemin slipped his hands into your pants. 

“No, I'm being cured, remember?” Jaemin smirked and leaned up to place a soft kiss on your jaw.

[missymurphy1985]

The Rebel (Cillian X OC OneShot)

Warning - smut - and this IS only a one shot, I can't cope writing another series at the minute 😂

Request? Yep!

Taglist @queenshelby @margoo0 @being-worthy @peakyscillian @janelongxox @elenavampire21 @noctvrnalmoth @ysmmsy @cloudofdisney @lauren-raines-x @namelesslosers @misscarolineshelby @screemqueen @cilleveryone @darlingjaye

"The fuck does she get off?" Cillian cried, throwing his bag across the trailer he shared with Paul Anderson.

"Someone's a fan of my new love interest!" Paul laughed watching Cillian fume as he paced the small trailer over and over again.

"I knew casting her was a mistake, she's fucking delusional!!!"

"What's she done now..."

"Literally THREW her coffee cup at her PA because she put milk in it... THREW IT!!! At her PA!!! Poor girl was fucking terrified man!"

"She's hot though, ain't she?'

"What? Fuck sake Paul you ever NOT think with your dick?" Paul smirked, raising his eyebrows at Cillian knowingly. "Yes okay, she's a good looking girl, but that doesn't mean she can get away with trampling over people to get her own way does it?"

"Maybe she just needs a good, solid man to ground her a little, bring her back to earth a bit?" Paul smirked.

"Go for it man, good luck to you. Last fella she had probably still needs therapy."

"Oh I wasn't talking about me mate." Cillian looked at him suspiciously.

"What?"

"Oh for fucks sake Cillian, when was your last eye test? Can you not see what's clear as daylight, right in front of you??" Cillian's eyes widened, not understanding a word coming out of Paul's mouth.

"You've lost me."

"Wonder if she's part Irish. Or wants to be...." Cillian's face contorted.

"Don't use that line it's fucking cheesy... Never works either. What's your point?"

"Mate if you don't get in there quick, she's gonna lose interest and Finn will be at it like a shot!"

"You're having a laugh aren't you? I'm not even remotely interested!"

"Uh huh. Okay. Just don't say I didn't warn you eh?" Paul put his baseball cap on and headed out the door, still with a smirk on his face. Cillian took a seat on the sofa and ran his fingers through what was left of his hair, rolling his eyes. Yes, Natalie was fucking hot... But my god was she challenging.

Throwing that cup today was one thing. Telling the director she didn't like her character was another. Her original character was supposed to be Tommy's new 'plaything' behind Lizzie's back, but Natalie had apparently requested a change of direction - she wanted to be Arthur's new love interest, nothing to do with Tommy at all. That confused Cillian, and he'd had to think back to see if he'd ever worked with her in the past, obviously he'd pissed her off at some stage, why else would being his onscreen love interest be so repulsive to her that she demanded an entire script change?

Heading into the bathroom, he glanced at himself in the mirror. He wasn't exactly repulsive, surely? Yes he had a few more wrinkles now that he did in series one, but he was nearly 45 now...

He shook his head quickly - why did it even bother him whether she found him attractive or not?? She was 32, not that much younger than him but still way out of his league, and to top it off she was a fucking nightmare!

But those legs... Her eyes... Her lips... He couldn't help himself imagining those lips wrapped around his cock when he lay in bed in his Manchester apartment alone at night... Without thinking he found himself palming the growing erection under his jeans, feeling that familiar stirring in his groin. Shaking his head quickly, he splashed his face with cold water and rearranged himself in his jeans, calming himself down before he embarrassed himself. Once his erection had gone down, he headed back out of the trailer and over to his hire car, the driver ready and waiting to take him back to the apartment block.

Natalie opened her apartment door and crashed onto the sofa, exhausted. A full week of intense filming, she was more than ready for a soak in the bath and a glass of Shiraz. Opening the cupboard in the kitchen area she groaned - no wine. She also remembered the bubble bath she'd bought, and subsequently left in her trailer back on set...

She fished around in her bag for her room key again, and bit her lip. She knew exactly who would have a bottle of bubble bath... She groaned to herself, having successfully avoided him up until now but her aching limbs were crying out for some Radox. She left her apartment and knocked on the door across the hall.

Cillian answered a few minutes later with just a towel wrapped around his waist and his hair wet.

"Erm... Hey?" He asked, not opening the door fully, more hiding himself behind it.

"Okay um, this is random I know, but I was just wondering if maybe you had any bubble bath going spare? Please?"

"Really?" He laughed.

"Is it so surprising to you that a girl likes a bath now and again?"

"No actually, what's surprising is that you actually have manners."

"I beg your pardon?"

"You said 'please'. Didn't think you had it in you."

"Listen, you either have bubble bath spare, or you don't, it's a simple fucking question Cillian."

"Those tactics won't work with me love." Cillian

"Forget it, for fucks sake..." She turned to leave, rolling her eyes.

"Wait.. yes I have spare. Come in, I'll grab it for you." He pushed the door open so Natalie could walk inside, before heading into the bathroom. Coming back out with his jeans on, she couldn't help but be drawn to his toned chest and biceps, his upper body still damp from his own bath moments before she'd disturbed him.

Cillian caught her checking him out and smirked a little, handing over the bottle of Radox. She took it, smiling a touch herself.

"You smile too." She lowered her eyes and tried to hide the grin on her face. "You're not as hard faced as you try and make out, are you?" His arms were folded across his chest now, leaning against the kitchen counter.

Her eyes suddenly watered, and she bit her lip. Cillian frowned watching her well up and instinctively moved closer, taking her shoulders into his hands.

"Hey now... I didn't mean to upset you..."

"No... No I deserved it. God I'm so sick of this!"

"Sick of what?"

"I have this reputation of being a diva... With my career... I just like things to be perfect and when they're not I can lose my temper so quickly and it's fucking horrible and I make people hate me!" She choked back a sob, and Cillian pulled her into his arms, holding her as her shoulders shook.

"We all like things to be perfect Nat, but life doesn't work out like a fairytale, things just go wrong and that's okay?"

"I know, and I always feel so fucking guilty afterwards.. I can't stop now - my reputation is the only thing keeping me in the press, keeping me relevant..."

"You're kidding, right? So all this bitchiness, the demanding ways - it's an act?"

"Some of my best work has been off camera Cill." He couldn't help but laugh. He opened the cupboard and pulled out two small glasses, followed by a bottle of Irish Whiskey. Offering Nat one, she nodded, and they both moved into the lounge area.

They talked for a while - comparing stories of Hollywood, other actors they'd worked with, before Cillian cleared his throat. He needed to know the truth about her changing the script to be Arthur's love interest rather than Tommy's, and now she'd sank a few whiskeys, she was probably loose enough to tell him straight.

She hung her head, embarrassed. She knew he'd probably find out eventually, being one of the producers, but she hoped if she avoided him long enough she'd never need to reveal the truth to him.

"I also turned down Inception. And they offered me Thandie Newton's role in The Retreat."

"Okay..."

"I turned them all down when I found out you were in them."

"Ouch!" He chuckled nervously, "I don't think I want to ask why!"

"Because.. and this is awkward so don't laugh yeah?" He nodded as a promise not to, but his eyes widened when she revealed the truth. "Because I've had a crush on you since I was a teenager... And I didn't wanna make it awkward but I guess I just kinda did.."

Cillian was stunned into silence for a minute, or five. His silence made her nervous, and she pulled herself off the sofa to head out, realising how much of a fool she'd made herself. Making a mental note to blame the whiskey in the morning, she stood up, only to feel his hands suddenly on her waist as he stood up next to her.

"So that's why you didn't want to play Tommy's love interest, huh?" He held her in front of him, his hands squeezing her hips as he pulled her closer.

"Would've been too awkward.. for me at least.." closer still, their faces now inches apart.

"Does this feel awkward?" Their bodies met, her heart pounding in her chest. She could feel how aroused he was, pressed up against her, making her breathing heavier.

"No..." He leaned down, pressing his lips gently against hers, just ghosting over them.

"And this?" He whispered, his hands moving up, not quite over her breasts, just underneath them and round her lower ribs. She couldn't speak, just shook her head. Her breath hitching in her throat as a hand snaked back down, under her leggings and underwear, softly caressing her inner thigh and mound. Cillian glanced at her, her eyes closed and breathing deepening as his fingers traced her core, pushing a finger inside her to feel how much she was throbbing for him.

"Want me to help you with that?" She nodded again, and felt his fingers probe her, moving up slightly to brush against her clit making her hips grind against him and her fingers press into his biceps. His fingers moved slowly, circling the small bud.

"That feels good...." She panted, rocking her hips to ride his fingers, needing more.

He responded by moving his fingers quicker, pushing the small button harder. Her head fell against his chest and she groaned, her orgasm coming quickly.

"Gonna make a mess on my fingers, Nat?" He whispered in her ear, her breath coming in short bursts now. His other hand moved to her hair, pulling the bobble from it and letting it fall down her back, running his fingers through and tugging it to pull her head back. His lips on her neck, biting and sucking at the skin. Her hand resting on his arm, keeping him in place as he fingered her.

"Don't stop... Don't stop... Faster..." She gasped, and he happily complied. Rubbing her clit hard now under her clothing.

"Make a mess on me, cum for me..." She came with a force she'd never felt before, gripping onto his arms and holding his arm steady, riding her hips against his hand as her orgasm began to subside. He gave her a few minutes to catch her breath before pulling his hand away, bringing his fingers to his lips to taste her, groaning at the sweetness and pressing his lips against hers.

Bringing her close again, he backed her up until her calves hit the sofa, before laying her against the cushions and pulling her leggings down, her underwear with them. She spread her legs, biting her lip as his mouth kissed up her thighs.

"You want me to fuck you, Nat?" He lifted her t shirt over her head, her body completely bare now as she nodded.

Her fingers pulled at his jeans, and he unfastened them, easing his erection out before allowing them to fall to the floor, kicking them across the room. Natalie pushed him onto the sofa, sitting up against the cushions before straddling him, his hard cock now pressed against her soaked core.

"I'm gonna fuck you, that okay?" She smiled, her forehead pressed against his as she sunk down on his length, gasping at the sensation of being completely filled by the man she had fantasised about for years. His hands moved to her hips, before she moved them, putting them behind his head, taking full control. He smirked, before his mouth fell open - her hips riding him felt incredible. Pulling her body up, keeping the tip inside, she bounced gently, teasing him. Sinking down on him again, only to repeat the process. His legs were shaking from the sensations.

"Don't tease me, ride me." His blue eyes were like ice, and Nat sunk down so he was fully sheathed before moving her hips back and forth. She released his hands and gripped onto his shoulders for leverage, arching her body backwards slightly so his cock hit against her g spot deep inside her. One of his hands moved to her ass cheek, the other to one of her breasts, both of them squeezing and kneading at the flesh as her body grinded against him.

The hand on her ass moved round to circle her still sensitive clit, making her hips jerk faster.

"Cillian.... Cillian...." Her breathy moans of his name, the way her pussy clamped him, claiming him completely, the feel of her firm breast in his hand, the way her eyes fluttered closed as her orgasm approached... She was intoxicating.

"Baby.. I'm close..." He groaned, feeling that burning coil in his abdomen.

"Me too... I'm on the pill..." He grinned and held her hips still, pounding his hips up hard from underneath her. He had to cover her mouth to silence her loud screams, careful not to alert Paul in the next apartment. That only seemed to turn her on more, and she took two of his fingers into her mouth, sucking them, still tasting herself on them from earlier. The hand on her ass slapped it and squeezed it hard in response, making her cry out.

"That's it... Good girl... Fuck, I'm gonna cum..." Her orgasm flowed from her at his words, and she felt him shoot several streams of hot cum deep inside her as her walls clenched around him, milking him for all he had to give her.

Their foreheads pressed together again, both panting as they rode out the waves of pleasure.

"Does that live up to your fantasy?" He chuckled, groaning a little as she gave him a final clench of her walls.

"More than... Fuck that was incredible..." She gasped, gently rocking against him, not wanting him to leave her body just yet. She could feel him hardening again, in fact she wasn't sure he even softened.

"Don't stop, keep moving... Nice and slow.. Just like that..." He helped her hips move slowly, riding him gently.

"You're insatiable, aren't you..." She groaned.

"You feel too good wrapped around me, full of my cum deep inside you... You gonna let me fill you up again yeah?" She didn't answer, instead just allowed him to move her against him. He brought her hand down to rub her clit, needing to feel her cum again. She circled the bud gently at first, then feeling his cock start to twitch inside her she picked up the pace. He suddenly moved them so she was underneath him, his hips pistoning into her as he bent his head down to watch her fingers pleasuring herself.

"I'm gonna cum, Cillian...."

"I'm right there with you, come on..." A deep groan from both of them as they came together, him filling her up for the second time.

His body fell against hers as she held his shoulders, his face buried in her neck lightly caressing the skin with the tip of his nose.

"Fuck... Natalie... I haven't been able to do that for years," he laughed, hissing slightly pulling his sensitive cock out of her. Their mixed juices flowing from her onto the sofa cushion.

"I only came over for bubble bath.." she chuckled, her head laid back against the arm of the sofa as she caught her breath.

"My bath's probably still warm, might as well jump in with me?" He offered.

"No funny business in there, I think I need a breather..."

"Better make it a quick bath then. You're not leaving this apartment tonight. Or this weekend, in fact."