#'Oh I hope that it's not no homo even though it's just a performance'

[littlemissmanga]

A Mechanic in the Sun

Pairing: Tech x Reader (no use of y/n, no physical description at all)

Warnings: Pure fluff, established relationship, just Tech being adorable

Rating: SFW

W/C: 1,039

Summary: As the team’s mechanic, maintenance of the Marauder falls to you and Tech. So while the others are off grabbing supplies on the temperate planet you’ve stopped at, the two of you break off to fix up the ship. But when Tech comes to ask your help with something inside, he finds you not working on the landing gear, but testing a rather odd hypothesis. As a man of science, he can’t very well interrupt, can he?

Clone x Reader Bingo Square: Mechanic @clonexreaderbingo

Masterlist

“Darling, could you-”

“Shhhh”

Tech looks up from his datapad as he comes around to the side of the ship, surprised by your shushing. Even more surprising is your position. Not under the Marauder, performing standard maintenance on the landing gear as he expected.

As you had said you would.

Rather you lay back on a towel you insisted on purchasing last time you were selected for a supply run. Something rather unnecessary in his opinion as the Marauder only had a sonic shower in the refresher. And yet it seems you found a use for it as a blanket, keeping your back clean from the dirt underneath as your limbs sprawl to conquer every corner.

Your eyes are closed and your expression is peaceful. And though he is loath to interrupt your quiet moment, time was of the essence.

Without Echo, the duties of mechanic fall solely to your combined shoulders and there is still much to be done if there is to be any hope of leaving this planet with an optimally functioning ship by nightfall.

“I am afraid I cannot remain silent at this moment. I do rather require your assistance. It seems the ventilation system was damaged as well during our last mission, and I cannot reach the wires in the back of the console. While not critical, we’d be remiss if we did not fix it now, when there’s time.” Tech adjusts his goggles as he rakes over your prone form once again. “And there is also the matter of the landing gear, which you have apparently abandoned.”

“Landing gear is done.” Your hand waves absently in the direction of the ship. “Just needed to be realigned. I’m conducting an experiment now and need to focus.”

Your dry tone may have fooled another, but Tech knows the humor running underneath. His eyebrow raises as he feels his lips tug ever so slightly into a smirk. Your antics never cease to amuse, though it certainly helps that you complete your tasks before engaging in them. Much unlike some of the Batch.

“Oh? And may I inquire as to the details of this experiment?”

It’s impressive, actually, how still you remain even as he can tell that your focus is shifting to center on him.

Warmth surges through his body at the knowledge. It had unnerved him at the beginning — being the object of your focus. Now that emotions had been processed and communicated, now that he knows that focus is one of interest and acceptance, it pleases him immeasurably.

“Homo Sapiens can receive vital nutrients from the sun,” you start, though it seems the gentle warmth of the sunlight you’re currently basking in has taken its toll on you, slowing your words.

You were most endearing like this, and Tech found himself folding to sit next to you. A few minutes indulging you (and in you) surely wouldn’t hurt his schedule too much. “Yes, namely vitamin D. I don’t see how that can be your hypothesis.”

At this, your eyes opened and cut to him. “I wasn’t finished, now, was I?”

With a chuckle, Tech waves you on.

“My hypothesis is that the human body can be trained to absorb more nutrients through sunlight,” you explain, closing your eyes and once again turning your face to the sky.

“My dear, it almost sounds like you are attempting to see if you can photosynthesize. You are much too intelligent not to know that such an endeavor is doomed to fail.”

“Just because the hypothesis has yet to be proven doesn’t mean it has been disproven,” you chastise playfully, finally allowing the smile he could tell you’ve been fighting to claim your lips.  “And this sunlight is so nice, I feel compelled to continue testing my hypothesis until it sets.”

The way you stretch is reminiscent of a lothcat as you maximize the surface area you can offer to the sun … and to him as he takes in how you arch and adjust yourself.

He must admit, you are correct; the sun on this planet is quite pleasant. Not unbearable but still warm. A dangerous indulgence, and yet he could understand how it would be welcome.

Your little ruse aside, maybe some sunlight was exactly what was needed right now.

Scooting down to lay by your side, Tech presses a gentle kiss to your cheek. “While I highly doubt you’ll turn into a plant by nightfall, I do see the benefit of continuing your experiment for another few minutes. In fact, I believe I shall join you.”

You roll lazily onto your side to meet his eyes with yours. “Really?”

He isn’t sure if you are conscious of the way your body curls into him. Likely not, since your entire goal until now has been to stretch out as much as possible. He decides the subconscious movement pleases him more — a sign that even the deepest parts of you reach out for him.

It was still an adjustment to be the one being reached for, looked for, chosen with such consistency and admiration. But it was one Tech eagerly welcomes. And he would always be there reaching out for you in return.

“I never say what I do not mean, my dear,” he confirmed, sealing it with another press of his lips, this time to your forehead. He feels as though his smile could rival the warmth of the sun at the sight of your contented expression in response. “However, I am setting a timer for exactly twenty minutes.”

Your groan reverberates against his chest as you scoot even closer to him. “Can I negotiate to thirty?”

“You may not. We cannot afford our mechanic becoming a layabout.” It feels a bit contradictory, then, for his arm to find its perch at that moment on the curve of your hip to secure you to him. “Though some reward for completing our tasks may not be out of order. If I may tempt you …”

Your eyes raise to his, shining bright with hope as you cleverly hear the tease in his voice.

“We should have additional time after our work is completed before the others return. I propose returning here to watch the sun set then.”

“Deal.”

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

a/n: I have no idea why my fluffiest thoughts always involve Tech. Like I love Tech as much as the next girl, but I always have the softest thoughts for him and it's odd cause I'm much more of a Wrecker girlie. Still, it was also so much fun to write in his POV!

This is my third entry for my Clone x Reader Bingo Square. You can read the other two here:

Don't Forget That, Okay? - Crosshair, SFW hurt/comfort

One Last Order, Part 2 - Rex, Rated E 18+ please read responsibly. (it can be read as a standalone fic, but if you want the full story, start with pt 1 here.)

[margridarnauds]

Hello, I’ve been murdered

[birdy-bat-writes]

Could I request some soft Constantine headcanons?

Yes, Mom! Oh @offendedfishnoises and I wrote a basis for a ‘soft John Constantine as a frazzled dad to very unruly children’ HC/ Series. Imma use some of that. I hope this good.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

John Constantine as a Mentor/Father figure

-       John would be the most confused soul on the face of the planet.

-       You were the child of a homo magi, only you didn’t know it. You lived with your father, a run-of-the-mill, average human. Your mother died when you were only a baby.

-       Everyone thought you were a normal child until you started glowing and floating around your living room.

-       Your dad tried to process what was happening while also trying to get his eight-year old child off the ceiling.

-       When your powers started to grow uncontrollable, he called the only person he knew had any experience with magic. His late wife’s good friend, John Constantine.

-       You saw him and were very confused. This dude was supposed to teach you something as complex as magic?

-       You gave him the benefit of the doubt. You watched him converse with your father, and then he looked right at you.

-       “Right, let’s see it then.”

-       “What?”

-       “Magic.”

-       “I can’t.”

-       “What do you mean ‘you can’t’? Just cast a spell, er, float. I heard you can do that.”

-       “I don’t know any spells, and if I start floating, it’s not intentional.”

-       “Oy…okay…”

-       You both just stared at each other in disbelief. This is what I have to work with?

****

-       You had moved in with John and his much more pleasant girlfriend, Zatanna. You called her ‘Zee’.

-       She loved you and would oversee your training in basic spells. You had gotten good at minor magic but when it came to consistency or focus, you weren’t doing so hot. On occasion, you were able to cultivate enough power for John’s spells. Too much power. You lit John on fire.

-       John was in charge of teaching you to keep your power in control and channel it. He was the leading expert here in other-worldly magic and harnessing it.

-       He didn’t think handling a child would be as difficult as it was. Unintentionally, you kept blowing stuff up or miraculously turning it into different colors. He didn’t even know you were doing that.

-       He knew he wasn’t as amiable as Zee, and his attitude was less than suitable for mentoring a small child, but he did his best.

-       You were the only person who didn’t get sarcastic comments when you messed up.

-       Over time, you grew more comfortable around John. You looked up to him in a way.

-       You continued to practice with Zatanna and John. You had certainly improved but you weren’t anywhere near where you wanted to be.

-       You turned John’s jacket pink. Bless him, he wore it anyway without a complaint.

-       John noticed your dull mood the last few days and it had him concerned.

-       If he was being honest, he had grown a little attached to you. He quite liked having you around. You were quite a spunky little thing. You were mischievous but also really caring. He saw so such of your mom in you. You had the same “Do no harm but take no b.s.” attitude and it always made him laugh.

-       If you were in a good mood and woke up early, you made toast and burnt eggs for the three of you. Zatanna always helped you make another batch, but John ate the burnt ones anyway. Awww.

-       You asked him why he ate them once and he insisted he couldn’t tell the difference.

-       You two even kept secrets, like the one time you saw him putting whiskey in his cereal bowl and just kept shut about it.

-       That day for your lesson he tried to be more encouraging and supportive. He tried to give you a high-five three times. Now you were concerned.

-       He had you try to grow a seed into a sapling. You looked defeated before even trying.

-       “No, John, I’ll blow it up.”

-       “You’re not going to blow it up. And even if you do, it can’t be that bad. It’s a seed.” Why did you look so terrified?

-       You tried anyway. You had been trying for an hour with no success. John never gave up on you, but you had enough.

-       John saw your hands fall by your sides and a tear fall on the floor.

-       “Hey… What’s wrong?” You were quietly sobbing. John bent down to meet your height.

-       He knew you felt discouraged. It really seemed to hurt him to see you cry.

-       “John, I can’t do it. I’m not good enough at all.”

-       “Y/N when I was nine, I couldn’t even do regular human stuff. Let alone magic. You’re doing just fine, Dearie.”

-       You just cried harder. John looked around and saw the items in the room glow. They were floating. That happened when you got upset, and it usually didn’t settle until you individually un-enchanted each object.

-       John didn’t mind the floating furniture. His only priority was comforting you. He followed his gut instinct and hugged you.

-       You instinctively wrapped your arms around him too.

-       “I have no doubt that in time, you’ll have mastered sorcery. You’re really very good, you know. Not many people can so skillfully turn a whole house blue.”

-       You laughed a bit at that. John looked up and saw the items returning to the ground where they were. That hadn’t happened before.

-       “Feel like trying one more time?” You nodded.

-       This time, the seed sprouted a stem and a very small leaf. You took that victory.

*******

-       Even after you grasped the concepts of basic magic, Zee and John continued to be your mentors. You loved learning new things from them.

-       Majority of what John taught you was kept secret from Zatanna. You didn’t think she would approve of using magic to send mean people’s pencils to other realms.

-       John was particularly proud of the time you turned an irritating neighbor’s black suit bright purple.

-       You would go to parades with him and he would lift you up on his shoulders to see better.

-       When you turned 10, You entered in a school science fair. Of course, your dad showed up, but you were a little surprised when you saw Zatanna there with John. And he was in a blazer? What happened to his twill jacket? He looked all tidied up and he was smiling at you from the back of the crowd.

-       He showed up to every recital, performance, and competition of yours. Always right in between your dad and Zee. She cheered very hard every time.

-       When you went on your first date, your dad stayed up waiting for you to come back. John did him one better and followed you. You knew though. That’s why his outfit was neon green when he came back.

-       Overall you loved John. He was the best mentor you could have asked for and an even better eccentric uncle.

-       And he loved you. To this day, he still has the grown plant that you sprouted during your magic lesson. He never thought he'd like children, but here he was.

[chibimyumi]

Hello chibimyumi! I've been a fan of black butler for a few years now, and I really want to get into the plays. The thing is, I'm a moron who has no idea where to start. Do you have any tips for how beginners like me can get into them? Thank you!

Hello Anon!

Well, asking me is asking for bias since I am a blog literally started because of the Furukawa era Kuromyus, so........I recommend you start with the Furukawa era Kuromyus （≽▽≼;;）Before the Furukawa era was the Matsushita Era.

Okay okay... I’ll try to be a bit more nuanced.

Reasons to start with Furukawa Era:

All stories are canon except a few minor changes for adaptation’s sake.

Furukawa’s Sebastian was declared above canon by Yana herself, and Editor Kuma can’t shut up about how much of a fanboy he is of Furukawa ever since.

The Ciels in these musicals are genuinely good child actors.

From 2016 on, TOHO (the most prestigious JP theatre that owns the literal Imperial Theatre aids them, so the quality is off the chart.

That  is not to say that it’s wrong to watch any Matsushita era musicals  though! It’s just that I personally don’t recommend it, the 2009, 2010  musical DVDs are out of production, so you’d have to start with 2013 and  2014.

Reasons to start with Matsushita Era:

You want to see the history of Kuromyu, where it all began.

You are a fan of Matsushita Yuya or other actors that only appear in those musicals.

You like BL-like shipping fanfics a lot, and the 2013 musical would be a feast then (though it’s full of canon-contradictions, plot-holes and homo- and transphobia, so you’ll have to be able to overlook that.)

Furukawa Era Kuromyu Menu

The Furukawa era Kuromyus come in three musicals chronologically.

The Lycoris that Blazes the Earth 2015

NOAH’S ARK CIRCUS 2016

Tango on the Campania 2018

The Lycoris that Blazes the Earth is the stage adaptation of the Jack the Ripper arc, while the other two’s titles speak for themselves.

General Recommendation

If you are familiar with the manga itself already, there is no need to watch the Furukawa era kuromyus chronologically; I’d say, just start with your favourite arc among the three. I offer high quality English subtitles in exchange for proof of legal ownership of the DVD. This is my initiative to combat pirating of Japanese stage productions, because Japanese stage actors only get paid for their rehearsal labour depending on the DVD sales. That is why every time anybody asks me: “where can I watch Kuromyu” I’ll answer: “anywhere where your disc player and screen are.”

As the DVDs are quite expensive for universal standards, I recommend watching the PVs first.

Official PV Lycoris that Blazes the Earth 2015.

⏫Pros to starting with Lycoris:

It’s the first Furukawa Sebastian,  and you can see where he started.

At this stage Furukawa was declared ‘canon’ (not ‘above-canon’ yet). To Yana this was the first time she ever saw somebody doing her baby Sebastian justice.

Madam Red is simply AMAZING, you can’t miss that.

This was the first time - on Yana’s instructions - that Grell is officially portrayed as a transgender woman rather than a “gay-transvestite-laughing-stock”.

⏬Cons to starting with Lycoris:

The over-all quality is not as high as the following two (because TOHO didn’t step in yet), but it’s still above average for 2.5D. It’s NOT not your money’s worth, but it’s not ridiculously good either. It’s just that it’s not representative of the later two musicals’ quality. Many people who first and only watched 2015 said they hated Kuromyu, but then when they watched the later two they said: “wow amazing!”

Some songs are just...jarringly bad...

Official dress rehearsal NOAH’s ARK CIRCUS.

⏫Pros to starting with Circus:

Here Furukawa was declared ‘above-canon’ by Yana herself.

Furukawa really has grown as Sebas, and it’s clear as day.

Ciel is ridiculous. He’s played by the unanimously agreed-upon best so far, Uchikawa Reo.

TOHO steps in for the first time, and their influence is apparent.

Most of the music is a blast.

Joker... OH JOKER....!!!!  He’s even better than the manga. 10/10

Baron Kelvin, also even better than the manga. 10/10

There are actual circus-worthy performances

Dagger is played by 2016 actual world champion uni-cyclist Mitsuya Ryo.

Doll is absolutely heart-wrenchingly adorable.

⏬Cons to starting with Lycoris:

It is not chronological to the Furukawa Era Kuromyu.

It mightttt set your expectations for others a bit too high to start here.

DVD PV of Tango on the Campania.

⏫Pros to starting with Campania:

Here Furukawa rendered Yana and Editor Kuma speechless.

Young Uchikawa Reo polished his singing for Ciel, and now everything is perfect about him.

Furukawa and Uchikawa’s friendship which they built in 2016 really shows here.

TOHO turned their support up to 11.

The ensemble members (the zombies) are as much the stars as Sebas and Ciel are. They are mind-blowing.

Most (but not all) consider these songs the best.

Best directing so far (by the esteemed ex-Takarazuka director Kodama Akiko).

A portrayal of Grell as a competent transgender reaper asked requested by Yana herself. Yana admitted she did Grell wrong, and asked Uehara to do Grell justice in her stead.

⏬Cons to starting with Campania:

It is not chronological to the Furukawa Era Kuromyu.

It WILL set your expectations for others a bit too high to start here.

I hope this helps! After you watch the PVs and do decide to buy the DVDs and get the English subs from me, do let me know!

Kuromyu DVD purchase links

Lycoris that Blazes the Earth 2015 (Furukawa)

Noah’s Ark Circus

Tango on the Campania

These 👆 are from amazon.jp which ships internationally AND has the best prices. You can buy these directly without proxy (click here for how to change amazon.jp to ENGLISH).

Here is my FAQ post in case you have more questions.

[binch-i-might-be]

hello hello I just got back from running some errands (yes, one of those errands was just to get energy drinks✨) and I had some Thoughts in the car, hope y’all are excited lmao

so. I’m german.

and I really wish we had some more umbrella terms regarding the lgbtq community, plus inclusive language. every fucking word here is gendered! and we don’t really have neutral pronouns just “occuring” in the language, like “they/them” in english.

that’s not what I want to talk about, tho.

if you know me, you know I go on about being a lesbian all the time lmao

I... don’t like that label in german.

I only say I’m lesbian in english, even though I actually still prefer to say I’m gay.

I rarely ever use “Lesbe” and “lesbisch” in german, I mostly say I like women, or I’m homo, and I wish I had another option.

I wish we had an umbrella term like “gay”, but we only really have “schwul”, which is for mlm, and “lesbisch”, which is for wlw.

both of those have been used as slurs, or just to be derogatory, similarly to how “gay” was used for a long time, and while “schwul” was used to describe annoying and stupid things, “lesbisch”, well...

honestly, that was mostly a term used to attack a girl not performing femininity properly. being told as a gender/sexuality confused twelve year old that “oh, you don’t like that piece of media or that traditionally female hobby? bist du ne Lesbe oder was?” is uh not great!

it’s othering.

kids and teens used that term to shame female presenting individuals who weren’t about their specific flavour of femininity, and adults just blatantly sexualised it.

the sheer amount of times I’ve been to parties or gatherings and met some dudes, came out to them in one way or the other, mostly to discourage any flirting, and have them go,

“Ooooh ne Lesbe ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)🥵” is staggering tbh

like sir. avert your disgusting male gaze. wlw are not here for you to lust after.

also - Kampflesbe. translates directly to “fight lesbian” (sorry lmao I’m trying my best here)

that’s basically a term for butch women, or just, you know, women that seem intimidating. doesn’t matter if you know her sexual orientation or not.

I’ve never heard that used in a positive context, and I don’t know if anyone has reclaimed it?

I guess it would be similar to “dyke”. I wouldn’t mind being called that! if anyone ever unironically called me a fucking Kampflesbe I think I would throw hands tho lol

my friends have called me that jokingly, and it’s funny! because I’m gay and ready to throw down!

but anyway. this is super rambly and I apologise. I guess I just wanted to get it off my chest :)

tl,dr: the german language doesn’t have a lot of terms for the lgbtq community, and many of the terms it does have are tainted for some people.

[uswnt-owns-this-homo]

Let a Bitch Hit You- Julie Ertz x Reader

     AN:  Here’s my attempt at a protective JJ, hope I did it justice!

TW: Homophobia, mentions of drugs/alcohol, cursing of course, homophobic slurs and language

You take a deep breath as the ref blows the starting whistle, the Courage kicking the ball back to their defense, signalling the start of the game. You try to follow the ball as much as possible, taking care to stay in position and wait for opportunities and passes to come your way. You can’t help but to think of the circumstances as your teammate, and long term girlfriend, Julie Johnson, gets the ball, and passes it quickly, opening up space and helping the Red Star’s attack. 

      The significance of the game is not lost on you, your first one against your prior team. Jaelene Hinkle, one of the most openly homophobic people in the league, had pushed you towards your transfer, though you and Julie were already discussing a request at a later time. After her and Ashlyn’s epic twitter battle, Jaelene had lashed out slightly, demanding that you, as the “resident queer on the team’’, get dressed for games and practices in a different area, so that she “could change without being leered at”. 

      The rest of the team, minus your national teammates, had just let her go along with it, not defending you or telling her she was wrong. This, along with direct statements to you about your sexuality, including, but not limited to: constantly telling you you’re going to hell and sinning, pelting balls at you during practice, and, during team bonding events, conveniently forgetting to invite you, leaving you disconnected with the rest of the team, had led to the situation at hand.

      Your former teammates, bar the national team members, attack you mercilessly. They go for cheap moves, like holding your jersey during corner kicks, and performing late slide tackles, obviously targeting your notoriously weak ankles and knees. Throughout the game, Julie’s frown has become more prominent, her play more sharp, focused on getting the win over the people, or more accurately, the person, who contributed to her girlfriend's small fall down the rabbit hole.

       Instead of discussing the transfer, and the events behind it, with a professional, you had turned to alcohol, and over the counter medications, drinking booze and then taking benadryl, or cough syrup, and sleeping for days. You had kept up your facade of your usual happy, energized, rival to Sonnett in memes personality, up until you had moved in with Julie in Chicago. She had quickly noticed your actions, taking count of the vodka and medicine bottles, and had pushed you to see a therapist, resulting in your sobriety of now 4 months. 

      Hinkle makes the mistake of going in for a late slide tackle, clipping your already sore ankle. You turn to her and she sneers, winking at you. You slowly get up, rolling your eyes as the ref allows play to continue.

      Julie has been slightly more aggressive when facing Hinkle, and some people have noticed, mainly you, and of course the target herself, especially after a particularly hard run in was made for the ball.

“Hey, Johnson, how about you clean up your play? This is the third time you’ve shoved me, getting sloppy there, homo?”

      The look on your girlfriend’s face says it all, and all you can do is run to put a hand on her shoulder, trying to keep her from retaliating.

“Aw, look, dyke is trying to stop big bad Julie from starting something she can’t finish. How’s the cough syrup binge going, Y/N? Still sober, or have you fucked that up as well?”

      You just blankly stare at her, feeling old urges resurface, trying to stay in the present, as well as keep Julie from getting carded.

“You know, I think you transferred because you know I’m right, and you can’t face the fact that you sin everyday, and don’t like that your sickness is brought to light, isn’t that right, Y/N?”

      Julie shakes you off, stomping forward and shoving Hinkle, causing you to follow, holding her back slightly, your team, and the opposition coming together in a large huddle, Alyssa grabbing Julie and holding her back..

“Alyssa, please. No, Y/N, she can’t talk to you like that! I mean, the league has done jack shit to her for harassing you, or for poor sportsmanship, or any of the other numerous things she’s done. Jesus, you tried to kill yourself! And what does she get? Absolutely nothing!”

Jaelene seems to falter for a moment, before her face turns in a sneer.

“Poor Y/N, can’t take any criticism, what’d you do, try to get away from it?”

      Julie finally breaks out of your and Alyasa’s grip, lunging at Hinkle, landing a solid punch to her jaw. The ref comes running, putting her hands on both players. Julie is still attempting to reach Hinkle, and laughs at the red card she’s shown.

“Oh yeah, fucking let the one who’s caused severe emotional and mental harm to my girlfriend get off scott free!”

Coach calls her over and she rolls her eyes, giving you a quick kiss on the forehead, glaring at Hinkle when she fake gags. 

You’ve had enough, officially snapped, gone off the metaphorical rails of tolerance of douchbaggery.

“You know, you can insult me, make me want to cease living, but you have no right to be disgusted. Any god I know would be appalled at how you’ve treated my community, and I know you don’t go to heaven just on the merit of being a homophobic christian. Ash was right, you have no place on the national team… You wouldn’t fit,”

      You shove her backwards, taking your yellow card with a grin. Play resumes relatively quickly, and your whole team goes forward into the second half with a renewed passion, compensating for Julie’s red. You lose yourself in the game, giving it your absolute all, and laying yourself out on every possible play.  You manage to score 3 goals, one which could have been defended by Hinkle. 

      The whistle blows and your team rushes you, picking you up, hugging you, and cheering. You all head back to the locker room and you spot Julie, staring at her phone, a blank stare on her face. You sit beside her, putting your arm around her shoulders and pulling her into a hug.

“Thank you, so much. For defending me, for fighting for me, even though I really missed my favorite ball feeder,”

Julie cracks a smile and shrugs.

      You pull her in for a short kiss, trying to  convey all of your love for her. You all walk out of the locker room, bags and bus buddies in tow. Julie holds your hand as you walk to the bus, rubbing a thumb over it as you stare blankly ahead of you, thinking back on your whole experience with Jaelene. Julie wraps her arms around you as you both get onto the bus, finding your usual seat beside Alyssa, who smiles worriedly at you. You take a deep breath and look at Julie.

“I just, I thought transferring would give me peace, but she’s still there, the thoughts, they’re still there. Just. Why is it such a big deal to her? I’m just living my life, trying to be happy, and she constantly made me feel, hell, sometimes still makes me feel, worthless, and I know therapy helped, but still, sometimes, like tonight’s game, brings it all back,”

      Julie gets a look on her face, as does Uncle Naeher. They look at each other and nod slightly, brows furrowed.

“Come on Alyssa, Y/N, sit here, we’ll be back in a second,”

You curl up in the seat, listening to Julie talk to Alyssa’s seat mate, and one of your friends on the team, Sam Kerr.

“Look, me and Alyssa have to go do something, we’ll catch an Uber to our place afterwards, could you do me a huge solid, look after Y/N for me? Make sure she stays talking, doesn’t zone out too much?”

Sam nods and Julie sighs, turns to you, and kisses you on the forehead.

Okay, love, I’m gonna go, sort things out.  I’ll be back in a bit, before you go to bed, okay?”

You numbly nod, heart racing.

      She quickly turns to Sam, nods, and goes to get off the not yet started bus. Coach looks at her and Alyssa, and they talk for a few seconds before he waves them on, glancing back at you. Sam moves to sit beside you, and you curl up to her side, silently wishing it was Julie.

      You’ve made it back to the hotel, eyes red from your crying on the way back. You carry your bag to your room, Sam walking you to it and giving you a hug as you walk inside. You put your things down, taking care to organize it so you don’t have to deal with it later. You turn the coffee maker on, set it to hot water, and start to run it, putting a tea bag in and leaving it to brew while you shower. You get your sweats and long sleeve t-shirt, taking out your toiletries and turning the water on cold, hoping the chill will help pull you out of your funk. You hop in and sit under the water, shivering slightly, but unwilling to turn it warmer. 

      You must sit there for an hour, slowly numbing even more from the cold water. You vaguely hear the room’s door open, Julie setting down her bag and putting her keys on the desk.

“Y/N? Babe?”

      You want to turn your head, say something, go lay and curl up in your girlfriend’s arms, let her reassure you, but the motivation doesn’t come. So, you sit and numbly watch, shivering and lips turning blue, as Julie comes in the bathroom, looks to you, and immediately rushes into the shower, clothes on and forehead cut, eye black.

“I’m so sorry. I should’ve been here, stayed with you, I just. She did this to you, without really trying, I couldn’t just let that happen,”

      You just shrug and hug her, trying to get warm, regretting your tactic for pulling yourself out of your mind.

“Okay, we need to get you warm. I saw your tea, you can have that, and then we can lay down and watch that documentary you heard about from Rose?”

      You nod, watching her turn water to warm, and strip, leaving her soaked clothes on the bathroom floor. Julie slowly washes your hair, conditions it, and takes a cloth to your slowly warming body, every touch and prod gentle and full of love. She keeps you under the warm spray for a while, holding you and rocking slightly.

“Okay, now which one of my hoodies do you want? We have the Santa Clara U or the Red Stars one, and some sweats, and some fuzzy socks are in your near future,”

You smile.

“You wore the Red Stars one more recently, so that one,”

A small blush runs across her cheeks, her usual confident demeanour gone.

“I’ll see what I can do, charmer. Ready to get out, get bundled, and get cuddled?”

She goes about shutting off the water, looking down to nod at you, and then stands up, you still cradled to her chest. You have a moment of realization.

“If I ask nicely, will you avoid putting clothing on?”

She sputters and turns tomato red.

“I- what? No, clothes are going on so I can properly warm you up, no more sly passes! I’m trying to take care of you, short stuff,”

You glower, sigh, and wrap your arms around her neck, waiting for her to put you down.

“Okay, look, tonight may have gotten to me, just a bit, but even all wacked out, I know somethings wrong. What happened to your face, and where’s Uncle?”

She sighs and starts to towel you off.

“Fine, The Giant and I went to have a chat with Hinkle, and I had her record it. I simply started talking with Hinkle, trying to reason and help her to understand things a little better, and then she hit me, and I didn’t hit back, and then she hit me some more,so now we’re hoping that we can send this to the big people in charge and maybe she’ll get suspended or in trouble or something. Alyssa is back with Sammy trying to stay away from conflict for the rest of her life. She did tell me to tell you to come down tomorrow if you needed some tips for dealing with the whole situation. Honestly think it’s the most she’s spoken this season,”

      You hug her and wrap the towel around her shoulders before smacking her gently in the leg.

“No more inciting violence in the hopes that you fuck with people who have ‘wronged me’ or whatever it is you said that one time, got it? Also, you need ice, but I will say I love a girl with a black eye,”

      You walk off into the main part of the room, ruffling through Julie’s bag to find her sweatshirt, lifting it over your head with a triumphant croon.

“Aw yeah, the epic girlfriend hoodie, let’s go!”

      Julie chuckles and walks out, coming up behind you and grabbing her SCU hoodie, pulling it on and winking.

“So that next time you want a sweatshirt, you can have a freshly me scented one,”

      You roll your eyes and grab a pair of training shorts, pulling them on and grabbing your tea, laying back carefully on the bed.

“Okay, coral documentary, snuggles, and then sleep,”

      Julie nods and gets in bed, pulling you close and grabbing the laptop beside the bed and opening up Netflix.

“Sounds like a pretty amazing night to me, shorty, let’s watch us some ocean stuff,”

     Needless to say you’re crying by the end of the documentary. Julie jerks awake, her soft snoring abruptly ceasing.

“What? What happened, who hurt you, I’ll let em’ punch me, get their ass suuspeendedd,”

      You chuckle, still crying slightly.

“Nobody, babe, just, he loves coral! And it’s disappearing, and he’s sad and all emotional and now I’m all emotional!”

      You sniff a few times and shut the computer, quickly putting it on the bedside table.

“Please don’t let anyone hit you again, Juls, pretty please,”

      She sleepily grunts and mumbles.

“Man, sometimes you just let a bitch hit you, ya’ know. Gotta get the w somehow, cause I sure didn’t get it during the game,”

      You laugh and wrap her arms tighter around you, knowing it’s going to be a bit of a long road ahead, but certain that the whole situation will pan out, and that you have Julie by your side through all of it.

[bittysvalentines]

Teenage Dream

From: @jeanjacketbittle

To: @redneterp

Rating: T

Tags: fake dating (sort of?),  friends to lovers, valentine’s day

Summary: Ransom swoops in and saves Holster by telling someone that he is Holster’s Valentine’s Day date. Holster repays his bro for the save by actually taking him out on a Valentine’s Day date. It’s not a real date, though. It’s just a bro-date. Right?

A note to my valentine:

I’ve wanted to write Holsom forever because I love them so much, but I never found the right muse for it. Writing this fic for you pushed me to do it, and I am so glad!! I hope you have as much fun reading it as I did writing it!

“Adam?”

Holster’s head whipped to find Esther Shapiro, hand on her hips at the end of their booth at Annie’s.

“Esther, hey! Uh, what’s-”

“I thought you said you had plans?”

Holster gestured vaguely to Ransom and the coffees and pastries on the table between them.  

“Plans that you couldn’t change to go on a Valentine’s date with me.”

“Oh. Well, uh...”

Ransom didn’t know what possessed him to say it, the thought hadn’t even stopped in his brain to check with him, just flew right out of his mouth. “Not that it’s your business, but this is a Valentine’s date.”

Ester rolled her eyes. “Oh, come on. Adam, if you hadn’t wanted to go out you should’ve just told me flat out instead of-”

“Plans on Valentine’s Day isn’t flat out enough?”

Esther blinked between them. Then, shockingly, she smiled. “Well, of all the people to blow me off for, I guess I’m glad it’s him.”

And then she left.

Holster looked at him, seemingly trying to blink the shock out of his eyes. “Bro, nice save. Thanks.”

Ransom chuckled. “C’yeah, well, you were floundering, and I didn’t want you to get dragged on a last-minute V-Date by Esther Shapiro.”

“You were right, I’d prefer a V-Date with you anyway.” Holster winked.

Ransom choked a little on his coffee. “Holtzy, I didn’t mean-”

Holster cut him off despite his mouth full of lemon cake. “Dude, are you about to no-homo me? We’re better than that.”

Ransom snorted. He was right, of course. They were way past no-homo both in their lives and in their friendship.

“So, what are we doing for phase 2 of our V-Date?”

“Holtz, we don’t have to.” His heart was beating a little faster in his chest.

“We were hanging out anyways, right?” Holster asked.

Ransom nodded.

“We can just tweak our plans a little, then. Oh!” Holster’s face lit up, and Ransom’s heart skipped a beat. "We could go to that new karaoke bar we’ve been wanting to go to. And then I’ll walk you home at the end of the night. Bam! Rans and Holster V-Date.” Holster explained.

It wasn’t like Ransom was surprised that Holster was so comfortable with this. They’d been best friends for three years. They did everything together and knew everything about each other. Including Holster’s new-found pansexuality.

It was stupid that it changed things. It shouldn’t, Ransom knew that. But it did. Because he was bi, and somehow he’d never even considered Holster in a more-than-bros way until Holster had come out to him and now it was all he could think about. It made things like a spur of the moment Valentine’s Day date fill his stomach with butterflies.

“Only if you want to, man. If you’d rather us have chips and Mario Kart like we planned that’s cool, too.” Holster assured him. He knew this was an out, and that he should take it. Holster really wouldn’t care either way, he knew that, but the look on his face when he’d thought of the karaoke bar…

“No, it sounds great. We should do it.” Ransom smiled, and Holster did an excited fist pump. “We do have to go back to the Haus and change, though. We are not dressed for karaoke.”

Holster let out a laugh. “Good call. I’ll get us some to-go cups.”

Ransom took a breath to get himself together once Holster was gone. He could do this. It wouldn’t be weird; it was just like any other night they spent together. It wasn’t a real date, after all. It was a friend date. A bro date. They’d literally been on bro-dates before. This was no different.

He stood up and cleared their table while Holster waited for their drinks. Ransom had a hold on himself again just in time for Holster to come back and hand him his tea. “Thanks,” Ransom said.

Holster smiled and they were on their way.

It was normal until Holster took Ransom’s free hand in his when they got outside Annie’s.

Ransom blinked at him, and Holster shrugged. “I always think February is going to be warmer than it is.” He explained, looking down at Ransom’s gloved hand in his.

“Gotta start using that weather app of yours, bro.” Ransom laughed.

Holster made an indignant sound. “When it’s been 15 degrees for a month and a half, 30 sounds like summer!”

Holster’s hand remained in his for the rest of the walk back, but it was easier after that. Holster had always been his tension diffuser, Ransom just hadn’t thought it would apply to situations where the tension was caused by Holster, too. It was a relief to find out he was wrong. Maybe he could do this after all.

Ransom had gotten ready for quite a few dates in his life, but he’d yet to get ready for one with the person he was going on the date with. He decided he liked it better, though, when Holster turned to him holding up two different shirts. Ransom couldn’t help but grin. “Dressing to impress, Holtzy?” he teased, pointing to one of the shirts.

“Don’t know why, you’re already coming home with me.” Holster smirked.

Ransom chuckled, turning back to his dresser to dig around for his own shirt so Holster wouldn’t see the flustered look on his face.

They split fare for the uber to the bar, and Holster talked Ransom into signing up for an act before eating anything.

They had a few drinks and watched the other acts while waiting for their turn, and Holster refused to tell him what song he’d signed them up for.

“Come on, Holtz, I need to prepare!” he protested.

Holster chuckled into his drink. “Trust me, you know the words. Besides, there’s no studying in karaoke. That’s the point, it’s just fun.”

Ransom sighed. “Okay, you’re right, I’m sorry. I’m just…” Just what? He didn’t even know.

“It’s okay, Ransy-poo, dates make everyone nervous.” He said it so casually that Ransom just nodded, not fully absorbing. By the time it processed, Holster was smiling at him and taking his hand, and he knew he couldn’t say anything about it, not when Holster was pulling him up to the stage and someone was handing him a microphone.

Ransom took the stage next to Holster, who was grinning at him as if there wasn’t a bar full of people watching them.

He heard the familiar guitar start to play and Ransom couldn’t help laughing as there were a few cheers at the song choice from the crowd.

Holster began to sing Katy Perry’s Teenage Dream to him, and somehow despite his anxiety and nerves about the date, everything faded and there was only them, Ransom and Holster. It was his favorite way to be.

“Now every February, you’ll be my Valentine. Valentine,” Holster sang, and it was right to him, like a question, a confirmation, and Ransom grinned.

Holster took to the next lyrics more like he usually did- an absolute karaoke ham, performing now more than he had been before. And Ransom fed off of his energy, joining him enthusiastically for the chorus. They danced around each other and Ransom practically forgot they were on a stage until people cheered after they belted out the last notes.

They definitely weren’t the best that night, considering Holster was practically tone-deaf, but the bar-goers were loving them anyway and they were having a goddamn blast. It was like when they sang at Kegsters- off-key and energetic and giving a Ransom a feeling that he couldn’t describe even if you paid him, but he swears he could live off of it.

Holster hugged him once they got off the stage, and Ransom couldn’t wipe the grin off his face even if he wanted to.

They ordered dinner, finally, and enjoyed the other acts as they picked off of each other’s plates. It didn’t feel like any date Ransom had ever been on, but… that wasn’t a bad thing.

It definitely felt more date-like, though, when Holster reached across the table and took one of Ransom’s hands in his. He just played with it idly as he ate his food, rubbing his hand with his thumb, toying with his fingers. If Ransom couldn’t literally feel him doing it, he wouldn’t even have noticed. But he had, and his heart was fucking racing again, and he knew he should be trying to listen because Holster was mid-story about something that had happened in one of his classes but Ransom just couldn’t think about anything besides the thoughts using his brain as a fucking NASCAR track.

“Why did you tell Esther you had plans?” He interrupted.

Holster stopped talking and gave him a look, eyebrows knitted. “Because we had plans, dude. She asked me, like, two days ago.”

“I would’ve understood. You know that.” Ransom insisted.

Holster nodded. “Of course you would have, but I didn’t want to cancel. I wanted to be with you.”

Ransom blinked at him. Holster’s voice was like fucking velvet and he finally let himself think that maybe Holster meant that like he wanted him to. “Holtzy, is this a real date?”

“I’d like for it to be.” Holster grinned at him, and Ransom felt both excitement and relief spread through him.

He let out a sigh. “Me too,” he said, smiling back at Holster. His grip on Ransom’s hand tightened, and they just looked at each other for a few moments. “I really want to kiss you right now, but I hate those stupid separated-by-a-table kisses.” Ransom admitted.

Holster chuckled. “Same. Are you finished?” he asked, gesturing to Ransom’s plate.

Ransom looked down and found the plate empty except for a few fries stolen from Holster’s plate. Holster’s was in a similar state.

“Wanna sing again, or?” Ransom asked.

Holster smirked. “I mean, I always wanna sing, but we can come back another time.

“Agreed.”

They paid at the bar and went outside to wait for their uber. “How about that kiss?” Ransom asked as they waited. “There’s no table in our way now.”

“Not yet.” Holster said, “if I start now, I will not want to stop, and I don’t think our uber driver will appreciate us making out in the back seat.”

Ransom laughed and agreed. It was a relief, to find out that Holster wanted this as much as he did. That he wanted him.

Once they were back at the Haus, though, they practically raced to the attic. They knew they were the first ones home, since all the lights had been off and all their other Hausmates were out with plans of their own.

And it was there, in their shared attic bedroom that they had their first kiss. And second. And third. And Ransom thought maybe they might have every kiss ever here in this room in this moment because he never wanted it to end.

They ended up on the bottom bunk, just kissing and hands roaming over clothed chests and backs, but Ransom felt the need to clarify, for both their sakes. “Despite what we sang about earlier, I don’t think we should go all the way tonight.” Ransom said between kisses.

Holster chuckled and nodded. “Agreed, I don’t want to go too fast and fuck this up.”

Ransom grinned and kissed him. “Glad we’re on the same page.”

He moved his mouth down to Holster’s neck and began kissing there when the blond spoke up again. “Katy was right about one thing, though.”

Ransom looked down at him, eyebrows raised.

“You make me,” he did this strange mix of a whisper and singing, “feel like I’m living a teenage dream,”

They laughed softly into each other’s necks before finding their rhythm again.

The next morning they woke up to the alarm clock, that beeped a few times before turning to the radio.

Holster almost fell out of the bed laughing, and Ransom shot out an arm to catch him.

Teenage Dream was playing on the radio.

-

“So, that’s why Teenage Dream is our song.” Ransom finished.

Their friends were all sprawled around Jack and Bitty’s living room, smiling at him and Holster, their hands clasped together.

“That’s sweet, y’all. But as your wedding planner I just can’t let Teenage Dream be your wedding song.” Bitty protested.

Jack put his hand on Bitty’s, still chuckling. “Come on, Bits. Settle on this one. Aren’t you just happy they aren’t asking to sing it?”

There were groans around the room as Holster whipped his head to Ransom. “Can we?” he asked excitedly.

Ransom could feel the death glare Bitty was giving Jack without even looking their way. But really, he knew that’s what they’d do from the beginning. He knew it would dawn on Holster eventually, and that he’d look at him with that same sunlit smile that he was giving him right now, and that Ransom would do absolutely anything for Holster, especially if it made him smile like that.

“Of course.”

Holster cheered, and their friends laughed and chirped them, and Ransom could barely hear any of it because just like that night all those years ago, it was just him and Holster grinning at each other like idiots, and that was all that mattered.

[scrumptiousalpacadeer]

Paul Thomas Anderson’s THE MASTER and what it may teach us about  mind-control vs freedom Post-Covid

So last night I watched The Master. It was a most pleasing way to spend a Saturday evening; alone, with two cats draped on the sofa and windowsill respectively, and it rounded off a pretty pedestrian Saturday mostly spent mowing and raking the lawn and scattering grass seed whilst *Boo finished reading Jacqueline Wilson’s Rose Rivers whilst occasionally appearing at the back door to yell; ‘mama, you’re driving me nuts with your gardening!’ Somehow I’d been looking forward to scattering my grass seed all week - the promise of moist new green growth on our dusty brown patches. Thing is - and there is a lesson in here somewhere - the grass seed box said it covered 10m square - I guess I got a bit carried away and basically I ran out after one corner. So one corner of my lawn will look like Eden, and the rest will continue to look like some deserted Sicilian scrubland... That’s life, baby, I guess. 

So anyway, The Master....dear God. There are many ways I could go with this...Firstly undiluted, scope, wonder, singular sensitivity, impossible mastery, extreme importance and sheer exalting, agonising beauty of Paul Thomas Anderson’s films is the subject of another post. (I’m still on a high from the explosive visceral experience of watching Daniel Day Lewis in There Will Be Blood and that was, what, 5 years ago? 10 years ago?) Then The Master came out in 2012 and P.T.A. raised his game even more. 

I could, and will another time, talk about the astonishing gift Joaquin Phoenix afforded the world with his embodiment of his character, Freddie Quell. (I say ‘embodiment’; ‘performance’ always strikes me as an incorrect way of describing an actors full immersion in an imagined character’s inner life.) To my mind, Freddie is one of the most affecting, heart-breaking, occasionally funny and downright truthful portrayals of a ‘broken’ man; an exiled, psychologically damaged, wild and lonely spirit who roams the world, desperate for love and acceptance, clearly one of the great ‘un-belonging’ of the post-war world in America. In one the open scenes he simulates fucking an over-sized figure of woman carved in sand on a hot beach, for the amusement of his army pals. In the final scene of the film, after his long long incredible journey , we see him caressing this sand woman again, resting his next to a large sandy breast. Oh poor dear Freddy Quell; my tears ran with him last night; knowing myself in this second viewing of the film, to be so like him. Perhaps one day I will be able to shake Joaquin Phoenix’s hand and say ‘thankyou so much for Freddie.....’ I often feel like that with actors work that resonates through the bones. 

I could also talk about how Philip Seymour Hoffman was possibly the greatest screen actor of his time, and how crazy it was that the world didn’t seem to mourn his tragic early death. Was it perhaps because he died of an accidental heroine overdose? - and this, well, didn’t sit very well with Hollywood. His embodiment here of Lancaster Dodd, charismatic leader of philosophical cult movement The Cause, is breath-taking. But then all his performances were breath-taking. I had a dream about him once (whole other post entitled CELEBRITY DREAMS coming your way); we were kind of friends even though I knew he was dead and his face kept appearing on billboards all over London. If, when; I meet him in the spirit world, I’d like to shake his hand and thank him for Lancaster Dodd and Brandt in The Big Lebowski, and Truman Capote, and also for providing me with one of the most pivotal theatre experiences of my life. August 2001, Edinburgh Festival, I witnessed his production of Jesus Hopped The A Train at The Gilded Balloon; this was running gold theatre. Within half a second of the play ending the entire full house erupted to it’s feet like we’d all been tasered from the floor. Thank you Philip...you gave me faith then that theatre is important; that art comes from dark places and revives...

I could talk about the astonishing crashing score composed by Radiohead’s guitarist Jonny Greenwood.

I could also talk about Amy Adam’s terrifying portrayal of Lancaster’s icy wife Peggy and her utterly brilliant final put-down to Freddie: “you either do this for a billion years, or not at all...” (she’s referencing Freddie’s abandonment of the cult she’s set up with her husband, but this line, I feel, could apply to motherhood...….)

                                                  * * * * * * * * * *

 It usually takes me two viewings for a films deeper meaning to seep in, and last night I was struck by what I see as the heart of the film. The core of the film is relationship between Freddie Quell and Lancaster Dodd; it’s an uncompromising study of male vulnerability and the cosmic search for ‘a father figure’...  On a bigger scale, its about how those in positions of assumed power and influence ( Dodd) rely on the adoration and worship of those whom society deem ‘worthless’ (Quell). It’s about the fragility and corruption of a society whereby a man promises freedom and empowerment to his followers (Dodd devises a system of ‘processing’ whereby he takes initiates back to past traumas through a curious mixture of interrogation and hypnosis and ‘cures’ them; he posits that his vision can cure leukaemia and will bring about world peace) and how those ‘disadvantaged’, the great ‘unloved’ can be absorbed into such an attractive lifestyle. In one painful scene, Freddie is taken to a party at a mansion, filled with monied people and luxurious things. Freddie is dressed smartly for the occasion; but is sweating with nerves and orders a scotch at the earliest opportunity, before hiding away in a side room and stealing an ornament. It took me back to my own exile, when, at the age of 17 I landed at Brentwood Boys School in Essex, and cut off from my parents, shattered from my sister’s suicide and a lifetime of confusion, I nonetheless attended many a glorious party; a perfect size 10 and top of the class, I knew how to say all the right things. But, like Freddie, I knew I didn’t and wouldn’t ever fit it. Like him, I would often sneak off to the side rooms, get off my head drunk to hide my shame and hopeless, and cause some fight..

In the end, despite himself, Freddie starts to see through Lancaster’s bullshit and returns to his life on the road. Though The Cause had given him a home, suits and ties, friendship, respect and a certain ‘standing’ that he could only have dreamed of, as he confesses to Peggy at the end, before returning to his own brand of personal lonely freedom; ‘it’s just not how I look’.  

                                                        * * * * * * * 

“Don’t you know, They’re talking about a revolution it sounds like a whisper Don’t you know you’d better run run run run run run run run.....” Tracey Chapman 

Talkin’ About A Revolution

What I find heartening and deeply exciting about these early post-Covid times, as the first chinks of sunlight pour in through windows that have separated us from friends, lovers, fellow man for so long, is that people are choosing freedom. In small ways, perhaps, but I get the overall sense that for many people, fear has had its day. As my dear friend said over tea the other day; ‘people are thinking fuck this, fuck it, we wanna fuck’....well, exactly. 

It was this dear friend I met up with in her wood a few weeks ago; we hugged each other day, and it was such a joyous relief to see her I told her that if I got the virus and killed me, oh fuck it, it would be worth it, just to sit next to her by a river on a sunny day...

I’ve had two other conversations lately to support my little theory; a particularly cheerful friend of mine turned up with her daughter unannounced on my doorstep couple of weeks back  - they had a bag of clothes; would Boo like them? Initially we did the ‘2 m’ thing, paying homage to THE RULES as dictated by the blessed government of this land; I hovered on the threshold of my kitchen - she stood outside by the flower-pots. Then I broke the rules; ‘look, do you wanna come in?’ - That was it. The ice was broken - and she stood, blond, beaming and glorious with her big sunglasses on, in my little kitchen - along with her daughter and mine, and I could literally have feasted forever on the sheer joyous fleshiness of having three other living homo sapiens near me. That sunny day in early June, two women in a small village in Sussex chose freedom. ‘I’ve just had enough of all this virus stuff’ she said ‘I’m even dreaming about it! I’ve just had enough’. 

Then last week a friend came over with her three glorious girl children and told me how her youngest, a endlessly sweet six yr old, had ‘hidden behind a tree with her friend so that they could have a hug’. Lets think about that for a moment; six years olds hiding behind trees to have a hug. Its pretty damn sad. And weird. This friend had been on full on paranoid lockdown due to one of the children’s potential serious health issues - but she’d reached breaking point. ‘I’ve had enough’ she said. And that day her girls and my daughter raced up and down the stairs and around the garden in glorious flagrance of any state prescribed social distancing rules. 

                                                * * * * * * * * * * * 

In the end, Freddie breaks free from his master’s and The Cause’s control and continues - we assume -  his lonely drift around the world. In their final agonising meeting, Lancaster reveals the smashed ungenerous ego of a despot thwarted by his adoring lover: ‘if I meet you in a future life I will show you no mercy, you will be my sworn enemy’. Freddie, emaciated, tearful and ever desperate to belong, asks Lancaster to reveal to him how and where they’d met in a previous life... He knows it’s bullshit, in the way I knew my father was incapable of loving me, but when you’ve got a Krakatoa sized hole in your heart, you just can’t stop hoping somehow...pledging allegiance to a resplendent asshole is somehow better than our greatest fear; the abyss of loneliness and isolation. Lets face it; freedom is pretty terrifying after such a long stretch of captivity. 

That’s the thing in these Covid times; we always have a choice. We have a choice now, whether to be continue to be afraid or whether to choose freedom. Whether to cut loose and go racing into the desert on a motorbike back to his first love, like Freddie does, following his own destiny, not succumbing to control forces that on the surface entice him into a richer more glamorous life. 

And I’m not talking about being an complete idiot and denying there’s a serious virus still on the loose, or hugging scared people in the street to prove a point, and I’m not denying  that many people are extremely vulnerable - I’m talking about something entirely different; that deep inner decision that calls in all of us - whether to choose the uncharted waters of freedom, or rest in an all-too familiar fear zone. 

To conclude, my dear friend Matilda sent me this book ‘Big Magic - Creative Living By Fear’ by Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat Pray Love (I’ve just watched the film its rather good I think...) Anyway, there’s this great chapter called Fear Is Boring which rang through me, growing up as I did drenched in the anxiety of a Munchausen Syndrome-by-proxy mother (WHOLE other post...) - but here’s what she says about the time, age fifteen, she ‘wised up’ to fear and chose another way: 

“I noticed that my fear never changed, never delighted, never offered a surprise twist or an unexpected ending. My fear was a song with only one note - only one word, actually - and that word was “STOP!” 

Dear reader, I’m shitting myself with the best of them, but I’ve had enough of fear. I’m not stopping. I’m going. What do you say?..... xxxx 

Big love from Christine 

[sushigal007]

The Friends Household

Over to Max Flexor and Mitch Indie! They share a lot, but separate houses, five feet apart ‘cause they’re not gay. Maybe.

Max: I will not give anybody a pearl necklace.

Mitch: Nothing.

Mitch: Soooo... are you gonna just stand there? Townie: Yes.

Max: Please, don’t go. She’s right behind me. Cheerleader: Fada soola gor!

Mitch: Ripp Grunt.

Max: :(

I was originally gonna lock their bedroom doors to give them some personal space, but then Humble dropped off the computer and I didn’t think it was fair to let just one of them have access to it, but that’s a decision Max is about to regret.

Right, watching the boys dick around in their tiny houses is getting boring and Mitch needs a creativity point, so I sent him to the music hall in the hope he’d roll a skill want. Mitch: Nope. But I do wanna jump on the sofas. Done. Now, about the skilling? Mitch: Lol nope.

Mitch: I do wanna play the drums though! ...OK, carry on! Mitch: And then I wanna prank somebody.

Marissa: Ventrillofart? Seriously? Mitch: It was just a joke!

Marissa: DO I LOOK LIKE A JOKE TO YOU?

Ah, domestic bliss.

Mitch and Max: No homo. Mitch and Max: *footsie under the table*

NO.

Max is gonna have so many cleaning points by the time he graduates. He’s not interested in skilling or doing any college work, so I assume he intends to mop his way to graduation.

Hows your stolen library book? Max: It’s about orphans and I wanna adopt them and save them from Count Olaf.

Spent ages trying to find out Mitch’s OTH and then realised they had zero paintings for me to see if it was art. And it’s art! Not that he cares, he’s not interested in buying an easel or any more paintings, so he’s going to be staring at this picture FOREVER. Mitch: It’s a dog! So I’m fine with that.

Max: Crop duster, coming through! Mitch: Haha, farts are funny!

You just gonna sit there? Mitch: Yup. You could read the book? Mitch: Nah, Max already spoiled the ending for me.

A single painting, even one of a dog, does not build a whole lot of art enthusiasm, so I sent Max out to the coffee shop to look at art.

Mitch: HAW HAW HAW THERE’S A WHOLE BUNCH OF DUDES WITH THEIR DICKS OUT! Ah, a Greek vase then.

HOW? Mitch: I dunno, I went to class?

College.

I’m ashamed to admit that I played two whole households through two semesters and sent everybody to the student center on multiple occasions and only now realised this espresso stand didn’t have a barista.

Mitch: Guess it’s gonna be booze then.

And now, the real reason I dragged him out to the student center - karaoke!

Mitch: This is doing nothing for me.

Mitch: And here’s the link to my Twitter. Follow me! Angela: Haha! No.

Mitch: I burned my dinner. :(

Both the boys need creativity points and refuse to roll any wants for it, so it’s back out to King’s Music Hall to try and trick them into autonomously skilling.

And they both performed admirably!

Townie: BOO YOU SUCK, GET OFF THE STAGE! Do not get off the stage!

Oh, Mitch is doing a Drama course and so I decided to invite over his professor because I’ve heard they’re in love with everybody, but when she chatted to Max, she just fell out of BFF with him and nothing else, so that was anticlimatic.

Oh well, it’s finals time!

Max: Omg omg gross gross gross.

Speaking of gross.

Mitch: Look over there! Monica: What- *water balloon to the back of the head*

Monica: HOW VERY DARE YOU. Poor Mitch, nobody ever appreciates his pranks. Possibly because all his pranks suck.

Anyway, he needs a body point, so I decided if he liked water that much, he could go swimming.

Back home, Max chats to Meadow Annie. (One day I will give the Pleasantview townies their real names back). Not!Meadow: ALIENS.

Streaker: You like space stuff? Check out this moon! Annie: OH GOD MY PURE VIRGIN EYES!

Streaker: Oh shit oh shit I just flashed a teenager.

Mitch invited over Delilah. Mitch: Kiss kiss darling.

And then I guess nothing interesting happened because the next shot was the coach. Usually he annoys me, but today I’m glad to see him because Mitch never finished getting that body point.

Mitch: Do I have to keep doing this now he’s gone? Do you still need a body point? Yes? Then keep stretching.

Alas, he didn’t manage to get it before finals.

Mitch rolled a want for a game, so of course I immediately jumped at the chance to get the one that skills.

Hobby Leader: Don’t look at me.

Max: Hi! Why don’t you come in! Random: I’d love to! Max: And while you’re here, inside a house, pretending to be a playable, you could see what it’s like to clean toilets.

Random: I am having second thoughts.

The nice thing about Mitch is that even though he never rolls any skilling or academic wants, his Pleasure secondary means he’s always happy to sing or play drums when I need him to.

Mitch: HA HA HA WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAPPY SIGNS!

He’s not so much into chess though. Mitch: Just gonna sit here and daydream. That’s fine, you have a chessboard at home.

Mitch: Ooh! I got fat!

Mitch: Well, it’s not like I can get any fatter.

Hobby Leader: Seriously, don’t look at me. Max: Believe me, I’m not.

Max: Chess? Mitch: Eh, I guess so.

You have a shower! You have two showers!

YOU HAVE A SHOWER RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!!

I got the barista to spawn! Turns out the problem was the counters I used to hide the ugly. I think I need to put them on walk-through blocks.

I sent both boys to the gym, hit pause and then suffered several minutes of panic when it wouldn’t unpause. I was this close to quitting without saving, when I hit Build Mode during all my button mashing, and the stupid broken Wants controller message that plagues me popped up. I guess I must have hit pause just when the broken Sim walked onto the lot and confused the whole game.

Anyway, this comment was more a message to remind me what fixed it in case it happens again and other than that, nothing happened.

Cheerleader: Can your head do this!? Max: Um, no, and I’m pretty sure yours shouldn’t either.

Cheerleader: Woo, TV!

And both boys scrape through another semester.

UBERHOOD INDEX

[razberryyum]

Positive Things about Guardian as a series (spoilers)

So I’ve been pretty harsh about the production team behind Guardian (writers, directors, set designers, wardrobe, the crew…including the extras…basically anyone who are not Bai Yu, Zhu Yilong, the actors who played Old Chu, Little Guo and Zhu Hong, who are Jiang Ming Yang, Xin Peng and  Gao Yu Er, respectively) and about the quality of the show as a whole when it doesn’t involve our main characters/leads, and I’ve actually been feeling bad about that now that the initial sense of shock has worn off a little. As a result, I woke up this morning and decided to make a list of all things that are GOOD about the show. Now, I am still hurting about how it ended and the things that went wrong which imho could have easily NOT (f.e. the 10,000 years dirt nap), but…BUT I will try my best NOT to let that negativity seep into this. 

So here goes, in no particular order, the positive things about the show:

- the show even exists. I mean, really, God bless, especially considering where it’s made. How did that even happen?? Despite all my bitching, I still marvel (almost DAILY so far) at the fact that Guardian exists and I got to watch it cuz China could’ve easily never put it back online. 

- the existence of Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan. But that’s pretty much a given. Especially since my life is forever changed because of them.

- every Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan scene together. That’s a given also. I would not be surprised if the writers literally used all their meager talent and energy on constructing those moments so that’s why they didn’t have much juice left for everything else. I mean, that’s a good thing, right? Kinda.

- they got Bai Yu and Zhu Yilong to play Zhao Yunlan and Shen Wei. I really hope the two actors got compensated well for their performances, though somehow I doubt it, especially since, from what I understand ZYL (omg I just stupidly realized the acronym for his name is the same as Zhao Yunlan’s. Wtf that is so cute!) was still very slowly rising in the ranks. But hopefully their current popularity as a result of the show has made up for it.

- the score and songs. Bought the OST from iTunes like one or two episodes in, loved the score and themes. I even bought Bai Yu and Zhu Yilong’s duet “Time of Flight” a few times (different platforms, different devices) cuz I just wanted to contribute to them…even though…who knows if they even see a cent from it, and pretty sure my few measly dollars probably isn’t helping anything. Probably just makes me seem stupid and insane. 

- the cute episode titles. Which I wasn’t even aware of until @avenuex123 pointed it out. Adorable.

- the censorship. Ok, censorship is never good imo, but in this singular case, perhaps because there were existing restrictions on the BL subject matter, the actors therefore were willing to sign on since they knew they didn’t have to do anything explicit (or maybe they would’ve been willing, this is just my own stupid assumption because of how Chinese society is…I say that as an Asian American with many…erm…”old-fashioned” friends and family members) AND they probably saw it as challenge to find creative ways to convey the nature of the characters while working within the confines of censorship laws. Although, this might be a case of me just trying to look on the bright side.

- the easter eggs. I agree with fellow Guardian fans who have pointed out that there was some love put into the making of this show, which is clearly exemplified in the small momentos scattered throughout the series. 

- the time travel concept. Not that the delve into the past was done well because I did have problems with it, but I did really appreciate the fact that Zhao Yunlan was the one and only all along due to his being sucked up into the wormhole and spit back out 10,000 years in the past to meet Shen Wei for the first time. I thought it was a tremendously romantic idea…even if the general execution of the past left a lot to be desired. I promised that I wouldn’t be negative, but I still have to say that while love at first sight is a lovely notion, it was still a bit hard to swallow that SW would fall SOOOO head over heels with ZYL after just conversing with him for like a few hours, to the point that he would pine for him for 10,000 years (though it’s probably technically more like a few decades due to his dirt nap, but I’ll buy it felt like 10K years to him). I just wish ZYL spent more time in the past with SW, and actually @xparrot‘s fic (”Now Lie In It" on AO3) made me feel a LOT better about the whole thing since they successfully fixed the problem by awesomely separating each scene we saw into days and years. But I did like the time travel idea; it was cool, even though it’s different from the novel.

- the nature of the necklace. I really liked the candy wrapper core. Broke my heart into bits and pieces in a GOOD way. Really loved everything about it. I understand it’s different in the novel as well, but in the context of the changes done for the show, I thought that was a pretty brilliant move. 

-  the Da Qing and ZYL ownership scene in episode 35 with SW listening. Loved that scene and the multiple purposes it was serving: establishing Da Qing’s relationship with ZYL, giving voice to how SW was feeling about ZYL leaving,   inspiring SW with the necklace idea, and then of course, the censorship workaround because it was like very homo while being nohomo at the same time. 

- SW and ZYL’s wardrobe. Probably a given since the fact that I love them means I love everything about them, but, like, SW even looked good as the Black Cloak Envoy and ZYL as Kunlun and those outfits (and their hairstyles) could’ve gone wrong so easily…thank God no one thought it was a good idea to make them wear a stupid looking afro wig or feathers on their heads.

- Old Chu/Little Guo. They were adorable, my second OTP from the show, and I was seriously jealous of all the PDA they were getting away with.

- recurring characters. Even though some of their acting abilities were highly questionable, I did appreciate how certain characters introduced in the beginning of the show would pop up again later on. I’m sure a good part of that was to save on hiring more people, but I still thought it was neat. For example, I wasn’t too fond of the merit brush dude (cuz his story was dumb and draggy), but I did like how this innocuous store owner that was little more than a background character at the start eventually became one of the villains. 

-  Ye Zun. He’s so CUTE. I mean, ok, Zhu Yilong playing him helped, but just seriously, his character is so fucked up and misguided and emo and adorable that I just wanted to give him a big hug all the time. When that shitty cockatoo he calls “Boss”** started smacking him around, I wanted to reach into the screen and throttle that ugly POS. I wouldn’t even be surprised if that asshole more than physically abused Ye Zun. Anyway, I just felt bad for the little puppy. I wish we got to spend more time with him and that he got redeemed earlier so that he could enjoy some love and hugs before being led into the wormhole (or…wherever it was that his big bro was heading off with him…wait, would it be the wormhole? But they died, right? So technically it should be like the reincarnation hole?) **(btw, why “Boss”? Why not “Leader”? Are the head villains paying their henchmen to follow them? So weird that they call their leaders “boss” which would imply they’re being paid wages which I truly doubt is the case)

- Da Qing. He’s a cutie too. Really wish the kitty girl had lived so that he wouldn’t be all alone, now that ZYL is gone. I guess Tech boy Lin Jing is going to take care of him now?  

- Zhu Hong. When she wasn’t inexplicably screaming her dialogue, I did like her…but a huge part of that is probably because I remember the actress from Yanxi Palace (she was playing a small villainous role but she did a good job) and I felt sorry for her. Putting the unrequited love aside, it must also be tough seeing ZYL now and yet knowing that’s not even the same guy she loves at all. Damn, that actually must be so unsettling for everyone who knew the old ZYL. 

-  the personality swap episode (ep 25). THAT was freaking adorable. Just wish it lasted longer and that eventually it affected SW and ZYL. Although, since they already eye-fuck each other like 99% of the time, what would be different? I guess SW would be a little looser…and ZYL would be a bit more sad and pining-er? (Btw, I literally never heard of the word “microexpressions” until Zhu Yilong entered my life). Omg, an image of them switching outfits just popped into my head. Oh shit, that would’ve been FUN to see. Dammit.

That’s all I could come up with for now…I’ll probably add more as I think of more things. Please feel free to contribute if you think of positive things I’ve left out. I might not agree but I’d still love to hear them.

[local-femme-gentleman]

lgbtq+ movies for pride🌈

🎬🎬🎬

1. They Way He Looks Directed by Daniel Ribeiro, with Fábio Audi and Ghilherme Lobo

The Way He Looks, or Hojo Eu Quero Voltar Sozino, is a brazillian coming of age movie about Leo, a blind teenager looking for some semblance of freedoom, his best friend Giovana and Gabriel, a handsome classmate who attracts Giovana’s attention and also happens to be insatiably curious about how Leo lives. The movie is lighthearted for the most part, and gracefully relaxed in a way that you wouldn’t expect a movie with this sort of premise to be. 

The way He Looks is endearing and truly nuanced in it’s portrayal of lgbtq+ teenagers - a lot more so than many of the lgbtq+ movies we get nowadays. The plot is both likeable and something very new and the movie definitely explore uncharted territory when it comes to the portrayal of sexuality, disabilities and particularly a rarely looked at mixture of the two. 

🎬🎬🎬

2. The Danish Girl Directed by Tom Hooper, with Eddie Redmayne and Alicia Vikander

The Danish Girl is a truly heartbreaking movie, and yet it is full of hopeful undertones. It follows Gerda and Einar Wegner, two artists and husband an wife. The movie starts with Gerda, who asks her husband to pose as a female model for a new painting she’s making, and in a twist of events this triggers Einar’s long suppressed issues about self and identity to resurface. I know a lot of people who didn’t enjoy The Danish Girl, as you may or may not have guessed I am not one of them. 

The movie tells the real-life story of Einar Wegener, - an artist who also happens to be the first known person to undergo a sexual reassignment surgery in the early 20th century, renaming herself Lili Elbe. The movie isn’t perfect, albeit beautifully short and perfectly cast the movie sometimes seams to be playing it too safe particularly for a film that could be so much more daring, but it does what it’s looking to do - presenting a beautiful, sad, and yet inspiring and realistic story about a women the public has lost as time has passed.  

🎬🎬🎬

3. Love, Simon Directed by Greg Berlanti, with Nick Robinson and Katherine Langford

I had to put Love, Simon on  this list, not only because i enjoyed it immensely but also because I think this is one of the first truly mainstream lgbt movies out there. It isn’t made for the oscars or the awards or to be enjoyed by just those that indulge in the indie film genre, it is simply a rom com just like any other - just with two boys. It follows Simon Spier, his friends, and an anonymous boy Simon has fallen in love with over email.

The movie is cliche at parts, like most rom coms are, full of voiceover and public declarations of love and catchy pop songs synonymous with the genre, but perhaps that’s what the creators were going for and the movie is done in a way that all these already overused tropes still feel new and fresh and only make the movie more enjoyable. It deviates slihgtly from it’s source material - Becky Albertalli's YA novel Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda - but the movie has already established itself as a modern classic of lgbt movies, the coming of age genre and the rom-com genre.

🎬🎬🎬

4. Brokeback Mountain Directed by Ang Lee, with Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal  

The other day I asked a friend of mine what he thought of this movie and he replied with the words “The gay cowboy movie right? Yeah, it’s pretty good.” In truth, Brokeback Mountain is so much more than just a ‘gay cowboy movie’ - the move is about forbidden love and the themes and concepts the movie follows can be applied to any type of forbidden love story, be it girl and girl or two people from warring families or opposing religions. The true beauty of Brokeback Mountain is that it’s story can applied to each of these premises, and still make for a heart warming, beautiful film. 

The movie follows Ennis and Jack - two shepherds who develop a relationship both sexual and emotional, despite both eventually getting married to their respective girlfriends. It’s a friendship turned secret romance, and it makes you happy and sad all at once, everyone is a victim, everyone is hurting, and yet the movie is tragic in a heartwarming way. The performances are great and in true Ang Lee fashion the scenery is incredibly beautiful, but the real beauty lies in the movie’s tragic yet oh so plausible story. 

🎬🎬🎬

5. Blue Is The Warmest Colour  Directed byy Abdellatif Kechiche, with Adèle Exrchopoulos and Léa Seydoux

In his review of the movie, renowned film critic, Roger Ebert writes, “While there have been plenty of movie romances not unlike this, there's never been one told in such an ambitiously immersive way” and I believe that these lines perfectly sum up what makes Blue Is The Warmest Colour, or La Vie D’Adèle if you use the french name, so great. The movie follows Adéle, a french teenager, who forms a deep connection with Emma, an older art student, who she met at a lesbian bar.

Much like The Danish Girl, I know quite a few people who haven’t liked this movie, I disagree. It’s a 3 hour long movie that captures the coming of age and sexual awakening of  it’s protagonist fairly well. The plot isn’t completely straight forward and expected, instead it takes you surprising places, and in true french film fashion the movie is absolutely beautifully shot. I would caution this movie though, because even along side movies like Brokeback Mountain and The Danish Girl, Blue Is The Warmest Colour is depressing at many points, but the movie is captivating and heart breaking in, at most times, a good way. 

🎬🎬🎬

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH🌈!!!!

[kissbaekhyunsbuns]

It’s my heart you’re stealing pt. 1

Idol!Chanyeol and Student!Baekhyun

(WARNING!! Strong language)

“The night we kissed”

Baekhyun threw his book at the wall. Sehun stared at him in disbelief. “You gotta be kidding me. Finals are in seven weeks, no worries” He said, now smiling a little, seeing his hyung being like that. “You know, today is the music awards, did he invite you?” Sehun asked and that caught Baekhyuns attention. He smiled sheepisly, trying to cover his face with his hoodie. Every kid in the campus knew that Baekhyun was solo artist Park Chanyeol’s friend and when Chanyeol was worldwide artist who made thousand dollars in a day, Baekhyun was studying so he could go to great university. “Did he invite you?” Sehun repeated and stared at Baekhyun from across the room. Baekhyun took his hood off of his head and nodded, still smiling like a sheep he is. 

“That’s cool I think. By the way, has Jongin told you about that thing between him and Soo?” Sehun asked and turned his head back to the book. He is trying to take control of his studying life finally. “Wait what? They’re dating?” Baekhyun asked pretty rushily, getting up from that lazy position he was sitting on his chair. “They kinda had a one night thing and it spread, and now they’re the school’s top one couple and now that Kyungsoo is school’s president, Jongin has three times better chances to be the dancing clubs president” Sehun said, quietly rubbing his face. Clock was about six, still he was pretty tired. “Even though clearly you and Chanyeol are the top one couple” He smiled and stared at Baekhyun again. Baekhyun’s big ass hoodie covered his whole hands, when he putted his hands on his face, trying to cover his face. He blushed easily and when they were talking about Chayeol, he always blushed. “We are not a couple, you uncultured brat!” He whined and threw his math notebook at Sehuns face. Sehun just laughed and dodged the notebook. They both laughed until someone knocked on the door. Both of the boys glanced each others and then Sehun got up and walked to dorm’s door. He opened the door and in a second Junmyeon walked in, flipping all over the place. “Did you know that Mrs. K. is going to retire next year?” He almost shouted as he walked in, keeping book in his other hand. He was studying to be a CEO. He looked like he was straight from a business trip everyday. He wore a suit, tie or a bow everyday, 24/7. “No, I didnt. Did you know that Baekhyun is going on a date with Chanyeol?” Sehun said with a little sass in his voice. Junmeyon’s face light up and he stared at Baekhyun in disbelief and happiness in his face. “Seriously? I thought it was Jongin and Soo who are the top one couple but now this? You’re going to be a star!” Junmeyon said and sat down at his bed. Baekhyun stared at him, trying to figure out what he’s saying. “So you want me to use him so you can see the defeat in Kyungsoo’s eyes? He doesn’t care about fame!” Baekhyun grunted and threw now biology notebook at Junmyeon. “Yeah, but you know that Minseok and Jongdae are going to be a thing?” Baekhyun said now pretty calmly. That caught Junmyeons attention right away.  “Well I heard that theyre crushed to each others” Baekhyun said, smiling like a sheep again. He was pretty happy about helping Jongdae and Minseok together. They both have been talking to Baekhyun about theyr crush things, and for past couple weeks they both have been talking about each other, and they are so in love. Talking about the devil himself, Baekhyuns phones messagetone rang. He took his phone, opening it. His password was everywhere 2-7-1-6. He pressed thoso numbers and the phone opened. The message was from Jongdae himself. Baekhyun opened the message and started laughing. In his message was linked a picture of a mirror, where was Jongdae. Naked. With his little ding-dong. I got up at the speed of light and ran to the dorm’s hall. Baekhyun saw his dorm’s door open. “Hey idiot!” Baekhyun shouted sheepishly smiling, walking to Jongdae’s and Jongin’s dorm, when he immediatly saw Jongdae suffering on the bed, his phone on the other side of his room. He knew he fucked up. “You sent your nudes to me, so if you want me to keep silent, give me ten dollars and a promise that you go out with Minseok” he laughed, and Jongdaes head popped from the pillows. “With Minseok Kim? H..he is wi.. with Luhan” he stuttered and Baekhyun saw his cheeks getting redder. “Yes! I have seen you with him. ”You have nice clothes” ”Thanks, would you like them 50% off? I sell them myself” ”I would like them 100% off” He is whipped for you, he literally wants to rip your clothes off of you” Baekhyun laughed again, jumping on the same bed as him, just to annoy him. Baekhyun stopped when Jongdae turned, and he clearly was thinking about it. “Ok. Deal” He laughed and Baekhyun showed a happy smirk. “By the way, who were those nudes meant to?” Baekhyun asked and then Jongdae pushed him down from the bed. Baekhyun got up laughing and smiling, running away from the room. 

Okay, now you’re all caught up. Let’s go back to the night when Asian music awards were starting.

I played with my hands, trying to keep the nervousness away. Chanyeol said he was here in five minutes, but that was six minutes ago. It was only a minute, it still made me nervous. I turned my head and immadiately saw black limo curving from the street. I felt my face light up when it drove in front of me. I wited couple of seconds and Chanyeol opened the door. My sheepish smile came back and then I saw the flowers in the backseat behind Chanyeol. “Shall we go?” He asked, smiling back at me. I nodded, as he walked me to the car. I sat down at the backseat and in a second, Chanyeol sat nex to me. “Im so lucky that we met” He whispered, taking the flowers, now giving them to me. I smiled, taking them to my lap. “So... is this a date-date or just a friendly visit at the music awards?” I asked, and that was somehow funny to Chanyeol. He laughed, covering his face a little. “Im giving you flowers, taking you to Asian Music Awards with a limo? I think it is a date, but let’s see what happens” Chanyeol smiled, taking my hand. Not like ‘no homo’, it was like ‘all the homo’. And omg that made me blush. I covered my face with my hand, trying not to look at Chanyeol.  “You’re so cute when you’re blushing” He said, letting my hand go, when he put on his sunglasses. “Why sunglasses? It is almost night?” I asked, looking at him. He laughed and lowered his glasses like in some kind of action movie. “Because I look cool like this, also I have to perform like this” He said, smiling to me his cute smile. He was so much longer than me, but he still was a little baby. “I was thinking... what are the news gonna say? Pop-star Park Chanyeol in AMA’s with a little student from Seoul?” I asked, looking at him. In radio, there was playing actually Chanyeol’s and Punch’s song ‘Stay with me’. It was my favourite collab song from him. “They are going to say what they want. No one cares” He said, smirking a lttle. Suddenly the car stopped. I looked from the window. Are we there already? Chanyeol smiled and opened the door. He stepped out and by his side was too bodyguards. Cameras were everywhere. I stepped out next to him, as he looked at me smiling. I heard some photographers asking who am I, but hanyeol just took my hand and took me with him towards the stadium.The bodyguards told us where to go. We walked from the doors, as we left the photographers with all the questions. We walked together an aisle filled with neon lights. We heard Pentagon’s ‘Shine’ being played and it made the moment weird in a good way. We walked now the aisle down to Chanyeol seat. He was next to Zico and CL. At the same table! This was like a dream come true. I smiled sheepisly as Chanyeol placed me to sit next to him, as he went to get drinks to us. Chaerin glanced at me and then turned to me. “Are you Chanyeol’s... what?” She asked. She looked amazinf She was wearing black hoodie over her bloody red dress. It was a cold night, I cant judge her.  “Oh! I am his friend!” I said, smiling at her. She smiled back, taking a quick sip of her drink. “I have known he for so long, that I see that he might even like you. He never takes anyone here. You’re special” She said, now taking longer sip of the drink. It’s weird that she seems cold and all that, but she is pretty nice. “That dress is special because it gets to be worn by you” I laughed and that made her smile. “Thank you! You are so nice! I hope I see you around!” She said as she stood up. She probably had to go perform. I smiled at her as Chanyeol sat next to me, offering me a drink. I took it, taking a quick sip of it.Then someone hit my seat and made my hand shake. My white shirt was all red because of the drink. I quickly stood up, as Chanyeol stared in shock at my shirt. A little panic took over me and then Chanyeol started to take me to the bathrooms. “Dont worry, it’ll come off!” He said, trying to calm me. He told me where the bathrooms are and I quickly ran there. I opened the door and walked to the sink. I poured the water as warm as I could take it and i tried to was the drink off. Chanyeol stayed at the table. I ruined my shirt. Everything was going wrong. Okay, the shirt was little whiter.  I washed my sleeves too, theyre covered in the drink too. I sighed, giving up. I heard Day6′s ‘Shoot me’ outside. It was a great song. Then I heard someone walking in. I glanced at the mirror. It was Chanyeol. I smiled a little. He walked next to me, smiling back to me. “It was a failure. Im a failure” I whispered and turned around. He was right behind me. I could feel his breath on my skin. “No. You are not a failure. You’re Byun Baekhyun, not a failure” He said, at the same time Jiwon walked in. Chanyeol took a step from me, staring at the floor, until he walked into one of the bathrooms. Now Chanyeol took both of my hands, putting them into my hips. I stared at his eyes. He just smiled. I tried not to look at him, but it felt impossible. “Relax” He said, now leaning in. I was pretty scared, but when he putted his lips onto mine, everything left my mind.

[theamazingcaptdeadpool]

That One Time Shit Went From Bad To Worse

Summary: The past downright sucks when it catches up.  Pairing: Silverpool (Wade Wilson x Pietro Maximoff)  Warnings: Explicit language, mentions of torture, mentions of abuse, narrowminded shithead army fuck, injuries, this might turn into a RP thing which does not ever have to be matched in length.  Word Count: 1648

Wade was heading home – he’d spent the evening at Sister Margaret’s School for Wayward Children. It had (eventually) been a fun night, though it took him some time to get back into his game, mainly because he missed Pietro. He’d shot some pool, thrown knives (instead of darts) and won, arm wrestled some bikers, shared some of his latest adventures and mishaps – and more importantly, caught up with Weasel. As he said bye to the guys at the door everyone seemed to be in good spirits, telling him not to forget them, come back soon, bring the Silvery guy. It made him smile; how easy it was to jump back into his old lifestyle.

Wade cut through a back alley. It was faster, besides, he wasn’t afraid that anyone would jump him. I’m friggin Deadpool after all. I can hold my own. It was dark, he could hardly see the contours of the trash bins and flattened cardboard boxes that told tales of hobos and junkies. They’d be off the street at night, though. Dark shadows moved between them. Rats or cats most likely. The street lights were like small glowing dots far up ahead – it gave him the whole “light at the end of your tunnel” feeling – though he was pretty sure there was no light at the end of his. Hell, I won’t even get to do the tunnel. I can’t die. He huffed to himself.

Somewhere someone hummed an all too familiar tune. At first he thought it came from one of the apartments above him. It floated in and out of the noises of the city, but grew more solid as he walked forward. It’s tones were in minor, sad but oddly comforting. How they moved up and down felt like being rocked back and forth, safe in someone’s embrace. Maybe because that’s what he tied to them. The melody drew him to a place he thought he’d left behind ages ago. Wade froze and listened. The hum broke into song with actual words – and it became painfully evident that it wasn’t performed by the one he expected to hear it from. Even he noticed that it was accented; not native Ukrainian. The tiny hope he had that Pietro had sought him out was ripped away from him.

“That does not belong to you,” Wade spoke to the street lights up ahead, as he glanced around. He couldn’t actually see anyone… Could he? “No? I don’t think it’s yours either.” the voice was raspy, as if they’ve had too much whiskey, which wasn’t too far from the truth. He instantly recognised the owner of it. “You’re still alive, eh? I thought you drowned yourself in a barrel of Jack.” Wade muttered, still trying to figure out where he was hidden. “Why don’t you come out and play. Did you bring your tasers this time? I love that electric tingle.” Wade went for his gun and realised far too late that he wasn’t carrying. Shit. Well, the throwing knives would have to do. Wade reached under his jacket – finding that most of them had been left in the target back at the bar. Fuck. That’s unfortunate. Fists it is, then. Ladies and gents. I give you Lieutenant Trevor Blake. A tall guy. Buzz cut. Grey eyes – to match his soul. Broad shoulders and slim waist; used to lift a lot. Intimidating. The kind of man you’re silent around. That instils fear and/or respect in people. Old Trev was a friend of my father’s. They served together. Were practically bros. When I enlisted - he was the guy to make sure I got kicked down. Not that I didn’t deserve it, but that fucker seemed to enjoy taking the crap out of me as much as my father had. Maybe he held me responsible for his death… Hell do I care. Shortly after I left the military to start my mercenary business, he got kicked out too. Unruly conduct with the soldiers, they said. Drunk at the job, too. Dealing with shit from the pasts. Screams of victims, gunshot echoes. He got what he deserved. If he wasn’t such a miserable fuck a veteran, I would have taken him out myself. For free. I thought he died. How wrong was I? After I signed up for Weapons-X he turned up like the fucking pest he is. Stryker must have pulled him clean out of AA, given him the green suit and patched the stars back on him. They probably share the same fascist mind set. I don’t want to talk to him long enough to find out. Our very last encounter had him trying to get me to pass out and giving me verbal hell at the same time – and I was mouthing off. It turned ugly. Let’s say he hit a nerve, I broke free from my restraints. Beat him raw and bloody. Got knocked out of course. Punished. I never saw him again. My guess is his pride took a hit for the worse… Or maybe I actually got him hospitalised. At least I made sure no one else would suffer him.  

Trevor chuckled darkly as he appeared from the darkness, nothing more than a silhouette in front of him. A fucking ghost from his past. He hummed some of the tune to taunt him more before he spoke; “It was a cute song you homos shared back there.” Wade’s jaw clenched. “Yeah? Are you jealous Trev? Too bad I never was into the old abusive shits huh?”   “And I never was into the scarred freaks. How you holdin’ up, boy?” The last word was condescending. It took all of Wade’s effort not to cringe, not to remember all those times he’d said it like that – with the physical upper hand. “Far better than you, lieutenant mc-drunk face.” Wade pulled out one of his knives. The streetlights betrayed him – and it glittered in the darkness. “I see your insults haven’t gotten any better.” Trevor pressed. “Tell me – what are you doing with that mutant, huh? If your father knew…” “How was it you worded it? Homo? Yeah. I’m totally gay for that guy.” Which wasn’t a lie. His chest swelled with love whenever he talked of Pietro, and he knew it stung the old man. “And my father is dead.” He added coldly, and flipped the knife before he sent it flying. Trevor was experienced, and despite his age he hadn’t slowed – so he was able to deflect it. Wade felt the knife belt. He had one more. Be careful now. “Thank god. To think of how he’d feel, knowing what you’ve become.” Trevor spat. “I don’t give a rats ass about either one of you. But hey, since you care so much about him – how about you join him?” Wade tried not to let the anger he felt colour his voice. “You’re gonna take me out, boy?” he laughed. Wade’s blood boiled. He drew a deep breath, to keep focus.

Several things happened at once, once he let go of that knife. He felt a jabbing pain to his neck. He heard Trevor grunt. Someone kicked him behind the knee and clawed at his shoulders. The next thing he knew, he was facing the smog of the city, groaning. His head was spinning. He tried to feel his neck, but someone stepped on his hand. He saw two, no… four? Eight? Figures standing over him. Hallucinating. They’ve drugged me. “That’s clever of you, but fucking weak. You know I’d take you out, old man.” Wade slurred, trying not to let whatever they have injected him with pull him under. “What do you want?” He actually feared that they’d lock him back up, torture him again - - - and keep him from Pietro. Wade attempted to trash, but it felt like he was under water. He just couldn’t move properly.

Trevor moved into view. He pulled the knife out from his side, groaning as he did so. “Amateur throw, boy. Missed my vitals.” Trevor turned the knife and jammed it into Wade’s heart with massive force, drawing an awful scream from his lips. “That’s what you want to aim for. Try to get some practise in, eh?” Trevor patted halfway slapped his cheek with bloody fingers, Wade desperately tried to turn his head away – but couldn’t. Trevor searched Wade’s pockets – found what he was looking for and sniffed as he straightened up, looming over him.

“That injection we gave you? It slows your healing for a while. Won’t stop it – but it’ll make you feel like hell for a little longer.” Trevor leered, before he whispered the last four words. “Ajax sends his regards,” Wade’s eyes widened. Fuck no – not those two together. He wanted to call Ajax out, say that he was a fucking chicken for not coming after him himself – but he never got the chance to. He saw the underside of Trevor’s boot, who stepped on his face, knocking him clean out.

Trevor tossed Wade’s cellphone over to one of his guys – getting him to unlock it. He went through his messages, not surprised to find Pietro on top of his texts. He took a photo of Wade, knocked out, with the broken jaw and nose – bleeding from the face, syringe standing out of his neck and oh – the knife in his heart, wrote “If you want him, come get him.” hit send and threw the phone on top of Wade.

“Let’s move out. The mutant freak might be here in no time.” Trevor instructed his guys – and they disappeared back into the shadows. They’d have time to leave because Trevor hadn’t revealed their location. And Wade? He was left bleeding, injured, drugged and alone – except forthe rats and cats that still lurked in the shadows. Trevor smirked as he saw the little figures moving up to the body.

@runfastgivesass

[chameleon-cryptid]

♻️ Rhyan

Rhyan from another universe (it’s going to be ours) or timeline (two time lines here).  Warnings for homophobia, implied drug use, and implied skankery: 

(whoops, this turned out really long and I didn’t proof read it. OH WELL)

_______________

“Oh look.Here he comes. The fag with his flute. I bet you like playing the skin flute too.”

“You know you’re going to hell, Rhyan. God hates fags!”

What did these jerks know about hell. For Rhyan, he was in it already. The halls of his highschool were lined with demons who seemed content on making this his own living hell. There wasn’t a day that went by where he wasn’t taunted, beat, or otherwise humiliated and ridiculed for who he was. He ignored it most of the time, but for some reason, it got to him today. He took off, running, trying to get to the place where he knew he was safe. Where he wasn’t a fag or a fairy. Where he was respected. 

He only stopped when he got to the musical instrument storage room in the music wing. The tears were already there though as he stormed in to the room, full of other students. Concerned voices reached out to him, but he wasn’t hearing them properly. 

“Rhyan? Are you okay?”

“Are those guys fucking with you again?”

“I’m going to go tell Mr. Aston. Those guys should be expelled.”

In the back of his mind, he heard that and shook his head, wiping away tears. “No...no I’m fine.”

He was always fine. Never reported it. He didn’t want to be trouble. His father would argue that kids bully each other and that his youngest son should man up, maybe throw a punch out if someone was bothering him. Rhyan theorised that if his father had been a classmate of his, he’d be one of the ones bullying him. It hurt. Suddenly, though, his vision was full of blonde hair and blue eyes.

“Fuck those guys, Rhyan. Or rather don’t. You’re way too good-looking for them. Want me to shove my snare right up their asshole?” 

Rhyan blushed. Mike was section leader of the percussion section, president of the marching band, and generally just a wonderful person. He was liked by everyone, attractive, smart. Rhyan had a bit of a crush on him, but then ...so did Mike’s girlfriend.

“No..I’m fine, Mike. Really I am.”

“Well...seriously though, fuck those guys. You’re the best musician in this school, best singer. What have those shits ever done. Like...their biggest accomplishment is probably kissing their cousins behind the shed at the family reunion. Fucking backwards, inbred hicks. Forget about them. You’ll have the last laugh someday when you’re famous.” The blonde teenager grinned, patting Rhyan’s forearm a bit harder than Rhyan would’ve liked but he realised the guy didn’t know his own strength.

Rhyan hoped MIke was right. Maybe one day. If he practised really hard. 

*********

Rhyan lounged in his hotel suite on a couch, eyes closed, shirtless, slightly drunk, amidst the chatter and noise of groupies and fans, makeup artists, roadies, PAs, lackeys, and techies. He’d just finished another sold out show and was still basking in the glow of the applause. He was vaguely aware that someone beautiful had slithered up beside him and was leaning provocatively toward him. Opening his eyes, his vision is met with a gorgeous young man, dark hair, pale eyes, tanned skin. Rhyan couldn’t help but smirk.

“Well, hello there.” He says to the unfamiliar face. Ah, the joy of groupies.

He was just about to get to know this particular person a little better when one of the members of security walked up. “Sorry, Mr. Charm. Coupla guys out here say they know you from marching band and highschool. Asked if they could come say hello.”

Rhyan reluctantly extracted his tongue from the groupie’s mouth and leaned back sighing. He was quiet for a moment, a little peeved at being interrupted. But if they were friends from marching band, he should see them. After all, they were his only comfort growing up. He nods finally. 

“Okay, show them in.” he said and turned back to look at the man beside him for a brief moment while the security guard went off to fetch the guys. “I’ll talk to you again in a couple minutes. You know, I always stay in this hotel when I tour here. The bathrooms have incredibly large tubs.”

The groupie grinned. He got the hint, standing and heading off toward the bathroom, throwing a coy look over his shoulder. Rhyan grinned watching him but then got distracted by the sight of his backup guitarist accidentally dumping a bunch of cocaine on the floor. 

“For fuck’s sake, Joe, if you can’t even manage to get the coke up your nose, maybe it’s time to call it a night.” He complained, though he was ignored except for being flipped off. He laughed a little bit as security showed up with his supposed former friends.

Rhyan froze. These weren’t friends from marching band. They were his bullies. The guys who made his four years of highschool a living hell. He stared up at these men, and suddenly he was fifteen again, running through the halls, crying his eyes out.

“Rhyan...hey. Do you...do you remember us? We went to highschool together.” One of them said.

“We really love your latest album. I mean, everyone knew in highschool you were gonna be big. Didn’t you win Most Musical for our graduating class?”

“Oh yeah, he didn’t didn’t he? Remember you sang the national anthem for the football games. You remember us, right. Chad and Tim. God, this is a fucking awesome party.” The first prattled on.

Rhyan was motionless, staring at the two as they tried to get Rhyan to acknowledge that he knew them. He dug his fingernails into his knees and clenched his jaw. How dare they. How dare they come and encroach on his territory. Those guys who used to make a big deal about even sitting in a seat he used for fear of ‘getting AIDS from the homo’. Rhyan was livid. But he was a performer. So he smiled. 

“Of course I remember you two. What sort of business are you in now?” He asked congenially.

“Oh, Chad here works in construction. Excavator operator and I got a job Benton Foundary.” Tim said. 

Rhyan nodded. “You guys married? Got any kids.”

Chad nods, smiling sheepishly. “Two kids. Not married anymore, but...well, single life eh!” he says gesturing around to the party.

Rhyan laughed a little. “Ah, yeah, it’s a good life.”

Tim nods enthusiastically eyeing a groupie in a lewdly appraising manner. “Yeah, single life.” He was wearing a wedding ring. 

Rhyan gave them a bit of a Look. Sure Rhyan was promiscuous, but he was at least honest about it. 

“It really is a good life. A great life.” Rhyan continued. “My life, it is fucking fantastic.” His voice was raising a bit, carrying through the room as more and more people at the party listened. People always listened to him. You didn’t get to be lead singer of an incredibly successful rock band if people didn’t want to listen to you.

“Amazing, life. I’ve got three houses, you know? One in California, one in London, and one down in the Caribbean. I’ve got ten cars. Though cars have never really been my thing. I like the motorbikes better. My accountant keeps telling me to stop buying them..but...” he shrugs, standing. “my willpower for something sporty and fast is non-existent...”

“I’ve stayed in the fanciest hotels, eaten at the best restaurants, and gone to the most exclusive clubs on earth. Met celebrities, royalty, politicians. And at one point...” He steps forward then, gesturing with his hands as the two men watch him frowning, only now realising that Rhyan’s making a point. “...at one point, I looked around at my lavish lifestyle and said...what am I doing with myself. All this wealth and I’m not giving back. So I started donating to charities. Lending my name, my voice, my image to charities that help combat bullying toward gay, lesbian, transgender teenagers. To find them support. Did you buy my album? Attend any of my shows? Some of those proceeds went toward that charity. So thanks guys. Not only did you inspire my charitable work, but you contributed to it, too.” he was nearly shouting now.

The room was a bit quiet then. Most of the partiers had no clue what was going on and why Rhyan was ranting at them. But from the back of the suite, a voice rang out. 

“WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!” The percussionist from Rhyan’s band cried out. In a moment, Mike was at Rhyan’s side, pointing at the two men. “Fuck those guys, Rhyan! They made your life fucking hell in highschool. Fuck them.”

Chad recognised the man, eyes widening. “Mike. Hey..come on buddy. We were kids. Boys will be boys, eh?”

MIke threw out a punch. A hard one. Right at Chad’s face. The man crumpled to the ground holding his nose. Rhyan’s eyes widenend and he covered his mouth with his hand, shocked at the splatter of blood that came out of the punch. 

“Miserable fucks” Mike said as Chad cradled his face and Tim just looked shocked. “Get these assholes out of here.” Mike said to the security guard who radioed for assistance before dragging the two out. 

Rhyan was still stunned as Mike shook out his bruised hand, frowning a bit and muttering something about suing if he’s broken it over that asshole’s nose.

“Mike..they’re gonna go to the press. You’ll get arrested for assault!” he said in a panicked voice.

“Please, battery at the most.” He gave a horned symbol with his fingers ironically. “Rock star life, yeah?” He said then ambled back across the room to his wife who was most definitely looking a little unimpressed muttering about how security could have taken care of the guys. 

Rhyan took a deep breath. He was definitely glad he wasn’t completely sober, otherwise he might’ve been freaking out now, on the phone to his publicist, making sure she could fix it. 

“Rhyan, are you coming? I ..met a friend on the way to the bathroom and we thought you were coming to join us.” The dark haired groupie from earlier called out from the bathroom door while a blonde one poked his head out too. “Look, I know you’re a rockstar and all and used to people doing whatever you say, but we’re gonna start without you if you don’t hurry up.” The blonde said with a challenging little smirk. Fiesty. Rhyan liked it. 

Rhyan smiled a little. “Sorry fellas.” he said and made his way over to bathroom, but not before looking over to Mike who was looked like he was being berated by his wife. He caught his best friend’s eyes and smiled his thanks to him. Mike in return nodded then gave the horned finger symbol again, mouthing ‘rock star life’ back at him. 

Rhyan grinned and chuckled. He loved his life, and in the end, Mike was right. He had had the last laugh.

[fifiliphaser]

A Face In The Remains

The Beauty In Bones

[AO3 Version]

Relationships: Jack Hodgins/Angela Montenegro, Temperance Brennan & Angela Montenegro

Characters: Jack Hodgins, Angela Montenegro, Clark Edison

Summary: A passionate palaeontologist and a beautiful artist—at first, they don't seem to have much in common. However, a set of bones and a murder mystery draws them together in a rather unexpected fashion. It may be a begginning of a long lasting partnership, or maybe something way more exciting.

("The 200th in the 10th" 'verse; basically, it is a collection of Hodgela-centered ficlets, because that one cute scene from that episode just wasn't enough.)

I loved that episode, but as a huge Hodgela fan I was a tad bit dissapointed that they get only a one short scene, as cute as it was. And after some fruitless searching for a fic about them in that setting, I gave up and decided to write something myself.

And that is why I present you today, my dear readers, that humble collection of ficlets I hope you will enjoy.

Since it is my first work for Bones, I have to start with admitting that I fell in love with that show not so long time ago (well, in the autumn of last year), but it helped me so much both as a source of great entertainment and an escape in the worse moments.

When I was watching "The 200th in the 10th" for the first time, I kinda hoped that they would show the process of sketching (Hodgela, you know), but I guess the 45-minute time frame didn't let them.

So this is my take on what could've happened in that moment. I hope everyone is bearably in character (especially Angie, since I don't consider it my best take on her character; hopefully, I will be more content with her in the next ficlet). However, I must admit I'm quite glad with how Hodgins' portrayal turned out—I think that he resembles that hopeless and nerdy romantic we all know and love.

Let me know if you like it! The next chapter should be published next week (hopefully)—I have a few more ideas, but I'm more than open for prompts and suggestions :D

Professor Hodgins paced nervously from the supposed remains of Eva Braga, set neatly on a table, to his precious tyrannosaurus. Miss Brennan’s idea of sketching a dead woman’s face was brilliant, admittedly, however, even the awareness of that fact couldn’t ease his anxiety. After all, despite all the superlatives which Miss Brennan used to describe her artist friend, there could only be so many as talented and as brilliant women as her. In other words, the professor feared that even though that woman might possess necessary artistic skills, she would not be able to capture accurately a possible appearance of the murder victim.

Obviously, he was the one to read all the information they needed from the bones, but he found himself lacking an artist’s imagination. He was afraid that if that woman—Miss Montenegro, he reminded himself—was unable to see anything in the bones herself, their task would be much more strenuous that he had initially anticipated, and its outcome could be short of the required accuracy. In consequence, the sketch would be of a very little help to Miss Brennan.

“She still has a few minutes, professor,” Edison pointed out, his eyes fixed on a bone he was currently studying.

At first, Hodgins ignored that comment, but after one more round from one remains to the others he concluded that his walking around could not possibly change the course of the current situation, and therefore he stopped next to the woman’s bones.

“Have you discovered something new?,” professor asked his assistant with genuine interest, hoping that there might be a clue in the bones helpful in determining the woman’s identity. In that case, sketching would become completely unnecessary.

“No, nothing,” Edison admitted, a little disappointed. “But I’m trying to collect as much information about the influence of fire on human bones as I can. I believe it’s worth documenting, because it may be useful in the future,” he smiled proudly, clearly pleased with his own forward thinking.

“Yes, it is certainly worth doing…,” professor agreed, leaning over the bones. “Never have I thought I might be that invested in examining the bones that are not million years old and furthermore belong to Homo sapiens,” he muttered, looking closely at the charred surface of ribs and a sternum.

He became so immersed in his observation that he didn’t register someone walking into the room and calling his name. It was a slight poking on his arm that finally attracted his attention. He turned around abruptly, only to find himself facing a woman of an intricate beauty. The pair of dark eyes were cautiously studying his face, while corners of the intensively red lips slowly raised in a polite smile. Dark brown wavy hair, framing her symmetrical features, were shining slightly in the light of the lamps illuminating the study.

However, he was forced to stop his marvelling over the beauty, as her sweet voice brought him back to reality. “I’m sorry, are you professor Jack Hodgins?”

He parted his lips, ready to answer, but he wasn’t able to find his voice. He could almost feel Edison’s stare boring into his back and getting more and more intensive with every passing moment. Although his assistant was probably ready to respond on his behalf, Hodgins finally gathered his bearings. “Ye-yes…,” he confirmed, scolding himself in his mind for his wavering voice. “Yes, that is me,” he added, this time more firmly.

The beauty’s smile broadened, with a glint of pearly teeth visible between her lips. “Brennan sent me, I’m supposed to make a sketch of the victim,” she exclaimed, glancing at Edison. “I heard the news,” she continued excitedly. “That mystery is getting more interesting with every discovery.”

“Oh, yes. Yes, it is,” professor chimed in, doing his best not to be completely distracted by that gorgeous woman that had just stepped into his study.

“May I take a look?,” she asked, pointing at the skull.

“Of course.” Hodgins smiled a bit awkwardly, stepping away and allowing the beauty to have a closer look.

“It’s…,” she paused for a moment, taking in the picture of the bones laying before her. “I never made a sketch of a face based only on a skull,” she admitted a bit sheepishly.

Professor compressed his lips, his earlier anxiety creeping back into his mind. His worries turned out to be justifiable apparently, yet he couldn’t dwell on this for too long as Miss Montenegro’s shy smile captured his attention.

“I've never seen real human bones and it is… a bit disturbing, but I wasn’t expecting that so much of actual face features can be seen on the skull,” she marvelled, capturing it with her delicate fingers and raising it a bit, so she could better examine its structure. “I knew it would be… an interesting experience, but this is…,” she trailed off, tracing the skull’s edges with her index finger. “I doubt I could enjoy working with dead people, but to give one of them their face back… I think it’s worth it,” she smiled, gazing at the professor, who did his best to pretend that he hadn’t been staring at her for the last couple of minutes.

“It is certainly high-minded,” Hodgins agreed, proceeding to adjust his glasses, so he could avoid her look. “I am glad that you are so driven to perform your task, Miss…,” he wanted to continue, his memory being as good as it was, but the woman jumped in quicker than he could finish.

“Oh, I forgot about introducing myself!,” she interjected apologetically, carefully putting the skull back on the table. “I’m Angela Montenegro,” she declared, offering her hand to the professor.

He took it a bit hesitantly, taken aback by her gesture. Her skin was soft; he couldn’t help but feel as if it was a piece of precious silk caressing his palm. “I’ve known that already, Miss Brennan informed me about all the details,” he explained politely, releasing her hand and giving her a small smile.

For a moment seconds seemed to last much longer than they should, as he sunk in those chocolate eyes, so full of excitement and passion. He would have stayed like this for the next few hours had it not been for the amount of important work that was yet to be done. Hodgins cleared his throat, motioning at his assistant. “This is Clark Edison, he is helping me with my research,” he clarified.

Miss Montenegro nodded at the other man, to which he responded with a warm smile. “Nice to meet you, Mr Edison,” she affirmed.

“The pleasure’s all mine,” the man replied, making a small bow.

She chuckled lightly in response, which was one of the most beautiful sounds the professor had ever heard. He couldn’t believe how it could have happened, but he was completely mesmerised by the woman before him. From her graceful movements, to her quite exotic features, everything about her seemed perfect. Why such an angel appeared in his study, he wasn’t able to tell.

“I think I should get to work,” Miss Montenegro remarked, reaching to her bag to pull out a sketchpad and drawing tools. “Where may I…” She looked around, searching for a suitable place to sit dawn and start sketching.

The professor quickly understood what she meant and showed her a small desk nearby. “I’ll bring you the skull in a moment.”

She nodded and headed towards the desk, sitting down on a chair next to it soon after. She placed everything she needed on the desktop, and laced her fingers, glancing at the two men that were leaning over the bones.

Hodgins quickly caught her look and cautiously took the skull. Rushing towards her, he tried to focus on the tools that were spread on the desk, instead of her curious gaze. “Voila,” he stated, putting the skull on one of the books to the side, so it could be better visible.

“Thank you.” She smiled, reaching out for a pencil. “I think we should start. So, tell me, doc, what do you see?” She looked at him with curiosity, tilting slightly her head.

“Oh, one can read the whole life story from the bones,” he declared enthusiastically, leaning closer to the skull. Indeed, he could see a face before him, although only in his own mind. When it came to describing that picture in an imaginative enough way, he doubted his ability. “But I'm afraid I lack an artistic soul,” he admitted dejectedly after a moment.

She narrowed her eyes. “Let's see about that…,” she muttered, more to herself it seemed. “Shall we?” She offered him a warm smile, to which he responded with a smile of his own.

[lumixnita]

*ﾟ‘ﾟTHE OFFICE ( SEASONS 1-9) SENTENCE MEME

There's too many people on this earth, we need a new plague.

Do you think that doing alcohol is cool?!

If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and___, I would shoot ___ twice.

Why are you the way that you are?

Just poopin’, you know how I be.

And you know what's going to be on your tombstone? Loser!

The Taliban is the worst . . . great heroin though.

Sometimes when I start a sentence, I don't even know where it's going, I just hope I find it along the way.

Suddenly, she's not yo ho no mo'.

I hate looking at your face, I wanna smash it.

Well, well, well…How the turntables…

I ran over a turtle in the parking lot But then I saved him by gluing his shell back together. But I'm not that good at puzzles.

You are! She/he is! She/he is the devil! I'm in hell! - I'm burning. Help me.

Oh you're paying way too much for worms, man. Who's your worm guy?

As soon as he messes up, I swoop in like a sexual predator.

I'm always thinking one step ahead, like a carpenter that makes stairs.

So I put the money in my shoe, and then I forgot about it until now.

I am better than you have ever been or ever will be.

I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

That's what she said.

Look at me. Look at me! Look at this face. This is not the face of a performer. This is the face of a scary apparition you see before you die.

Its Britney, bitch.

What if we all get together and help each other and hire a new guy and then we all kill him, but first we take out, like, a $100,000 life insurance policy? I bet you guys like that idea, don't you?

I don't care what they say about me. . . I just want to eat.

You all took a life here today. The life of the party.

I decided to stay home, eat a bunch of tacos in my basement. Now my basement smells like tacos. You can't air out a basement. And taco air is heavy. It settles at the lowest point.

I've done a lot more for a lot less.

Last time, you pulled my pants down, and then you tried to choke me with my shoelace.

Disposable cameras are fun, but it seems a little wasteful. You never get to see your pictures.

I never smile if I can help it. Showing one's teeth is a submission signal in primates. When someone smiles at me, all I see is a chimpanzee begging for its life.

If that's flashing, then lock me up.

I stepped on a piece of glass in the parking lot, which hurt.That got infected, even though I peed on it.

Hey, ___! This is Michael Jackson calling from Wonderland!

If I can't scuba, then what's this all been about?

Its like my life is buffering.

Whether it's a Gremlin or Chucky the doll--the key is to throw it in something. Like a fireplace or a tub of electricity.

Kids, sometimes it pays to be gay.

If I don't have some cake soon, I might die.

This is an environment of welcoming, and you should just get the hell out of here.

Occasionally, I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me!

___, I am in love with you. I don't believe in much, okay? I don't believe in horoscopes. I don't believe in Christmas. I sure as hell don't believe in God. But for all of the disbelief, I believe in us. I believe in love.

I am Beyoncé always.

Sometimes we play a game where we see who can fit the most m&m's in their mouth.

I tried to talk to ___ and be his/her friend, but that is like trying to be friends with an evil snail.

My philosophy is basically this, and this is something that I live by, and I always have, and I always will: Don't ever, for any reason, do anything, to anyone, for any reason, ever, no matter what, no matter where, or who, or who you are with, or where you are going, or where you've been, ever, for any reason whatsoever.

That's inappropriate.

Just pretend we're talking until the cops leave.

Ah, my favorite part of an ice cream party. The bagel chips.

We're all homos: homosapiens.

I love inside jokes. Love to be a part of one someday.