#'I was so smooth at flirting i could just throw a suave look and the boys fell all over me!!'

[megalunalexi-aesthetic]

I can't vote so I'm calling on everyone, vote Lloyd Allen, the babiest of girls

UNRELIABLE NARRATORS; SIDE C

Lloyd Allen Propaganda:

I'm genuinely not sure if this counts as unreliable but your honor, I love him. He's what is called a 'posthuman,' in his source, which is someone who can jump between narratives and change them by. Literally being a narrator. Specifically in the New Albion Radio Hour this is played with by him coaxing the main character (also a posthuman who isn't quite Aware of what she is) 'back into character' when she starts trying to break out of the story he wants to tell. Which is the entire destruction of the city New Albion. He eventually changes the plot to still be a tragedy, once that other posthuman starts meddling, but with her specifically being killed rather than the entire city falling. She still ends up defying it, though in the process her father and aunt die.

Eugenides Propaganda:

the entire plot hinges on a detail he lets the reader (and every other character) assume is true. I don't want to spoil it because it's a really fun reveal but he is lying from the first second he appears on the page and you can't trust him to tell the full truth about ANYTHING related to himself and his goals. he mostly does it to keep his advantage and not have other characters be suspicious of him but it's just so fun when you realise he's been lying the whole time

[chromes-corner]

Also because I’m feeling indecisive, sfw fluff hcs one for lilac and one for sparkling too? Like same top reader and same dynamic, but sfw and fluff? Verbal and physical affection? Ty again! I really enjoy your writing

ABSOLUTELY GODTIER TASTE IN MEN

enjoy!!

---

Lilac/Reader & Sparkling/Reader

Notes: headcanons w/ a more assertive reader

Content Warnings: none

A/N: I! BELIEVE! IN! UNDERRATED! CHARACTER! SUPREMACY!

Lilac

Lilac is entirely indifferent to your confidence and assertiveness. In fact, he sort of prefers it that way.

He is perfectly content to follow along with whatever it is you decide the two of you are doing.

He feels completely the opposite about your very public displays of affection, however.

^^It’s not that he doesn’t like PDA and the like, it just catches him off-guard sometimes.

Lilac is the deadly assassin that gets the job done, no questions asked, so he can’t help but feel a little bashful when he’s got someone cooing in his ear about how attractive he is.

Don’t even get me started on kissing in public. Lilac absolutely cannot say no to your kisses, but he insists that you don’t need to drag him over for one every ten minutes.

If someone so much as starts to poke fun at how Lilac gets dragged around like a dog on a leash, both you and Lilac will give them a look that could kill that shuts them up instantly.

When you start gushing about Lilac in front of others, he’ll stand very rigidly and look away with an embarrassed scowl.

“Was that necessary?” Lilac asks once you’ve left the social encounter.

“Yep, how else would they have known how much I love you, my darling?” you say sweetly.

Lilac wordlessly clears his throat as his face heats up. He does not question you further.

Though you sometimes put a damper on his dangerous reputation, Lilac would much rather be with you than without you.

Who else is going to tell the waiter that he asked for no pickles?

Sparkling

Sparkling is such a flirt at work, but when he’s off the clock and with you, it’s a completely different story.

When he tries to be flirtatious and suave with you, you fire back the same with ten times the intensity.

You easily counter his pick-up lines and smooth moves with jokes and jabs of your own.

Who knew Sparkling was such a flustered mess?

You drag him around by the hand, and he can do nothing but follow.

Sparkling is surprisingly shy about PDA, so he gets very embarrassed when you unabashedly have your hands all over him in public.

^^He’s very giggly about it, though. He’ll laugh and remind you of where you are when you’re throwing your arms around his neck and kissing him in the middle of the street.

You grab his hand and bring his arm around your shoulders when you’re out walking sometimes. It makes him smile from ear to ear.

You’ll cheer him on when he completes even the most menial task, and he’ll get all blushy at your praise.

“Woo! That’s my boy!” you exclaim with a few claps.

Sparkling turns red as a cherry. “All I did was tie my shoelaces…?”

Even if you do embarrass him and tell his friends about how timid he is behind closed doors, he loves you all the same.

You keep him coming up with new material, that’s for sure!

^^He swears that he’ll eventually find a flirty line that flusters you instead!

[sunjaesol]

juke | fluff | drabble | title: voodoo doll // 5sos

🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

"I feel like Julie's ignoring me," Luke huffs, collapsing on the old couch. "Right?"

Alex is sitting at the edge of the loft, legs dangling, and sighs when Luke clearly interrupted his reading of the paperback. The boys stare at each other for a beat, the pouty boy not giving up his disgruntlement, so Alex puts his book down in surrender.

Poofing to sit beside him, he says, "What happened?"

"We talked at her school and then she didn't hug me!"

Alex blinks, confused. "So... she... didn't ignore you?"

His scowl deepens. "She did."

"Do you know the definition of ignoring someone?" he deadpans. "She talked to you at school, which, by the way, you should never be."

"I can go wherever I want."

"You go wherever Julie goes," Alex points out.

"I don't!"

"Then go do something right now — alone."

Luke gasps. "You kicking me out?"

Alex laughs, "I'm challenging you to get out of Julie-land, for once."

Ha, he's acting like Luke's attached to the hip with Julie. It's not like he's dependent on her, but it's just more fun to be around her. She makes the day better. Is that so wrong? So what if he tries to make her laugh during school hours? So what if he poofs into her bedroom while she's studying to tease her?

Sure, he's got a big fat crush on her, but they're first and foremost best friends. How can he not be over-fucking-zealous when it comes to his best friends?

Crossing his arms, he feigns indifference. "Sure, whatever. I'll, uh, go to the skate park. There are still record stores, right?"

Amused, the blonde nods and returns to his book, leaving Luke more annoyed and flustered than when he came in. With a snap of his fingers, he reappears in the heart of the bustling L.A. in search of excitement. He can do this! He doesn't need Julie, or anyone, to have fun!

And he does have fun. At first. Wandering around the few record stores that still thrive in the area, listening to new records and fawning over vintage ones — unbothered by customers phasing through him. He goes to Venice Beach and watches the skaters, talks to a couple of ghosts ("Gnarly waves, dude! Wish I could still surf!") and almost salivates at the smell of a delicious sandwich shop.

But that's the first few hours. Then it just goes downhill, like, really fast.

Sulking down the streets, annoyed people can't see him, wondering what his boys are up to, wondering what Julie is up to. If she's having fun, if she's bored, if Nick is trying to sweet talk her again. Luke frowns. He doesn't like that guy one bit. Too clean, too smooth, too... yeah, Nick ain't it. He hopes Julie sees that as well.

Oh, man. Is he jealous now? Should he go to her school and check? But then Alex wins! And how the hell would he even begin to explain it to Julie? "Hey, Jules! I got mad jealous of Nick possibly flirting with you. Has it happened yet?" That's crazy. He can't do that.

Finally, the sun dips into the afternoon and the miserable Luke poofs back to the studio. Alex is gone, Reggie's still out too, so all he can do is wait for Julie with eager anticipation.

When her footsteps near, he perks up.

"Hey, Luke," she smiles, dropping her backpack by the doors. "What's— oh!"

Before she can finish her sentence, he scoops her up in a warm embrace and lifts her off the ground.

Her sweet laugh chimes in his ear and he feels at ease again. Alex was right: he's fully immersed in Julie-land and, frankly, has no intention of flying back any time soon. The crush is mega fuckin' huge and he doesn't care at all.

"I'm still surprised you can hug me," she says. "It's like—" he puts her down and he catches her shy grin "—really... intense."

He grimaces. "Intense?"

"Good intense." She gently grabs his hand. "Promise."

Their hands swing between them and Luke feels himself melting. He knows he should crack a joke right now, or throw a song idea, but this is better. This is so much better.

She giggles, "What? Stop looking at me like that!"

Tugging on her hand, his head ducks to meet her eye and says, "I— what am I doing?"

Her gaze averts and she lets go of his hand, though her smile keeps growing as she goes to slide behind her piano. A breath leaves him, unsure how long he's been standing there, and collects himself.

She definitely isn't ignoring him now.

"You know what you're doing," Julie quips, directing his attention back to her. Challenge lights up her face as she leans forward. "I don't believe you don't know."

He puffs. "I swear to Eric Clapton I have no idea."

"That thing you do with your eyes? And smile?" When he doesn't react, clueless, she sits back with a shrug. "Whatever..."

"No!" He rushes forward, dialling up his smile to convince her. "No, continue, I wanna know." Propping his elbows on the glossy wood, he adds, "C'mon, boss, whatcha thinkin'?"

Julie chuckles, whipping up her phone and taking a picture of him. Confused, he cranes his neck to see if he shows up and then freezes. Whoa.

First of all, it's high definition. Not those grainy ass pictures Reggie used to take.

Secondly, his face. What the hell! Does he really make that face?

Sliding the phone towards him, she says with a smug hint, "Do you see it?"

When the screen fades to black, his heart spikes up. Reggie told him a couple of days ago how obvious he was, but he had dismissed it. But fuck, man, he really is. How is he supposed to stay suave and play along with the game of no ghost on human macking, when she's cornering him?

Shy, he says, "And... I have to stop doing that?"

She shrugs. "Maybe."

"Maybe?"

"Why do you look at me like that?"

His eyes narrow. Now she's just playing with him. Bouncing around the piano, he slides into the seat beside her and seizes her up. "You– you know why."

She doesn't stop, getting all in his face — something she probably learned from him — and uttering, "I do?"

"'Course," he retorts, casual, like he isn't freaking out inside, "I always say you're a star, so..."

Connection is all he ever craves, but he doesn't think it's ever felt so petrifying as now, when Julie's expression falls into one of complete awe. When she's so close he could kiss her. When they're both nearing the sun and uncovering all that's been simmering beneath each knowing smile and harmonised verse.

"I thought... you meant it in a, like, music way," she whispers.

He shrugs, dopey. "Both."

Never the first to move away, to back down, he waits for her to react. Luke's thrown it all on the table now (or piano, really) and there's no time to regret it.

Julie's gorgeous, something she deserves to be reminded of.

And then she kisses his cheek, chaste, and dazzles him with that smile that always makes his breath stutter.

Oh, man, oh, man, oh, man...

Turning to her songbook, she exhales loudly and says, "Anyway... music?"

"Yeah," he chuckles, giddy, "I'm thinking... Payphone?"

"Yeah, let's work on the bridge."

🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

@bluefirewrites @blush-and-books @willexx @ourstarscollided @unsaid-emily @pink-flame @constantly-singing @stydixa

[bloodypeachblog]

WARNING: Mention of abuse, necrophilia, and rape! Also NSFW stuff! Minors DNI! (Sorry for not posting that before!)

Ok, wanted to make this before I go on vacation tomorrow: what kind of boyfriend/girlfriend the LOV would be like. I'm writing a poly-relationship dark longfic (I'll provide links if anyone is interested) and that inspired this post. Also, this is based on fem!reader, so if it doesn't fit you, feel free to replace or add the needed words as you read. K, let's go.

Dabi: Rarely shows emotions, but deep down loves you immensely. You're the only good thing in his life. Can be possessive, but not in a way to raise concern. Refuses to be vulnerable unless he's alone with you or had a bad day. (NSFW: In bed, he is the top. Always. Pinning you down, just plowing into you until you moan his name. He'd tie you up and use you as his little play thing. You will be marked by the end of it, hickeys, bite marks, small burn spots, nothing serious or too noticeable).

Shigaraki: Yandere as hell. Is obsessed with you and will kill anyone who looks at you suggestively. Is quick to anger and can easily misunderstand situations due to that temper. But he is also just a scared little kid deep down. He craves your touch, your presence, your scent. He will cling to you like a kid clings to a teddy bear if he's upset. (NSFW: pretty similar to Dabi, but he'd talk about how you're all his, no one else's. Has a master/slave kink).

Spinner: You're the reason he keeps fighting for a better world. He will act like a tough guy in public, but you know that he's just putting up a front since when you're alone, he's a blushing, shy, embarrassed ball of scales. Dude will freeze up the moment you hug or kiss him. You two would play video games and he sometimes lets you win just to see that look of joy on your face. (NSFW: Most likely he's a virgin, so he'd be shy as all hell. He'd be making sure that you're alright and try to help you feel as good as he does. Such a caring lover. Also, dude has a lizard quirk, right? So it's possible he'd be affected during mating season. Cuz whoo boi, will you need birth control then. He will drop the shyness act and try to get a baby in you until his tank is empty. Just destroying you in bed, enough so you're walking funny the next day. Sometimes into knife play, making small cuts on your skin and licking them).

Twice: Oh. My. God. He loves you so much. You're the equivalent of a goddess to him. He would be so protective of you, beating the living daylights out of people who try to hurt you. When he's having a bad day because of his mental problems, the moment you pull him in and hold him close, he will melt like ice in 100°F weather, being a blubbering mess, saying how much he loves you and wants to marry you. Such a cinnamon roll. And he'd be such a good father, oh my lord. He will love you and your child more than anything. (NSFW: He'd probably be 70% bottom, 30% top. He would be worried about hurting you or making sure you feel good too. He'd do his best to let you finish first. The moment you're on top, he sees you as a gift from God himself, feeling so blessed to have you).

Mr. Compress: This suave, Tuxedo Mask wannabe motherfucker. He will sweep you off your feet the moment he lays eyes on you. You'll be his beautiful assistant in his acts and he'll treat you like a princess. Dude will be smooth as all hell and give no fucks about it. Mirio has met his match when it comes to flirting with you. You will blush as red as a tomato each time he throws a pick-up line at you. (NSFW: He is the ringleader of this show. He will tease the hell out of you and have you begging for him. He'd use his cold metal hand against your hot skin and watch you wiggle and squirm. You are the lion, he is the lion tamer. You'll be craving him til he decides to give it to you).

Toga: Well if she doesn't kill you, she'd be that bubbly high school girl kind of girlfriend. Go on fun dates like the mall, eating at a restaurant, going dancing, killing small animals and some randos on the street. You'd both would have horror movie nights and she'd cheer for the murderer in the films. (NSFW [she's over 18 in this headcanon]: Favorite position is on top. She also loves knife play, leaving little knicks here and there and cleaning up any blood with her tongue).

Muscular: ..yeah no he'd be a very abusive boyfriend. Sorry for the Muscular fans out there, I just don't see him as dateable. (NSFW: Oh no sweetie. He would rape you daily, no say in the matter.)

Mustard: He wouldn't be a good boyfriend either. Guy only cares about himself and would date himself if he could. (NSFW: NO)

Kurogiri: He'd be the gentleman type. That's all I got. (NSFW: That's fucking necrophilia, I ain't touching that).

Moonfish: ...I mean he'd certainly be obsessed with you, but not in the way you'd want. He'd probably would just rather eat you. (NSFW: He'd probably just get off to eating you, and not in the sexy way).

[thatringboy]

Xiaoven idol au? 👀 (no angst please ahah)

okay it may seem a tiny bit angsty at the beginning but i prommy it turns into kisses and cuteness as it goes on

We're Doing It Together

Warnings: Xiao being dumb as rocks and oblivious as hell to everything

Characters: Xiao, Venti

Ships: Xiaoven

Word Count: 1,774

Summary: Idol!Xiao finds out that his close friend Venti wants to join a new troupe after the two of them being solo for a while

The cold night air bit at the young man’s nose as he pulled his forest green hood down over his eyes. He could see his breath float away in the air as he sighed and checked his watch.

He’s late.

The sound of sneakers smacking the pavement got louder in his ears until someone ran up to him out of breath. “Xiao! I’m so sorry! Practice ran long and then Kaeya started an argument with Lisa and then--”

Xiao put a hand to silence him and returned his gaze to the frozen river under the bridge. “It’s fine. Must be nice to have a group like that.”

The new arrival laughed lightly and nudged him. “You make it sound like I’m on stage preforming with them!”

“It’s not like Jean won’t let you.”

He put his hands behind his head, his teal braids blowing gently in the wind. “Eh, my time has come and gone for this business.”

Xiao glared at him. “You make us sound old!”

It was true, the two young men no longer preformed with their original groups. Xiao’s group “Yaksha 5” had disbanded as the other four members all left the idol business and his new band “Adepti” only met once a month to write songs. No more live performances. The other young man, Venti, used to preform under the stagename “Barbatos” with the famous idol group “Celestia”, but he and the other remaining senior member - a tall man who went by the stagename “Morax” - had left a while ago. Now, Morax went by Zhongli and occasionally wrote songs with Adepti while Venti became a choreographer with a popular rookie troupe named “Favonius”.

The two stood there in silence watching the lights of streetlamps dance off of falling snowflakes before them. Venti tucked his hands into his jacket pockets and sighed. “I got an offer from a new group of guys who want me on stage with them. They say they want me on soprano.”

Xiao gave him a sideways look. “And? I thought you swore off preforming or something when you left Celestia.”

Venti balled his hands into fists inside his pocket and didn’t meet his eyes. “I think… I met the center of this group; he’s a really nice guy. They’ve got a manager already and apparently have done some music with Jean. She’s the one who got me in contact with them.”

“So you’re gonna join them?” His voice sounded distant, lonely. There weren’t many solo performers in the idol world. Xiao and Venti had been riding their residual fame from their past groups for years and hadn’t really signed contracts with a single troupe from how sourly they left their past groups. Xiao thought they were special in that way… but Venti was the one still getting new offers for shows while Xiao had to almost beg to be an opening.

Venti looked him in the eyes. “I haven’t agreed to yet.”

“Really?” Xiao scoffed. “And here I thought you would be all over the chance to start a new group.”

The shorter man squinted his eyes. “I told them I’m only joining up if my conditions are met!”

Xiao’s eyebrows shot up. “You have standards?”

“Of course! And very high ones at that!” Venti pouted. “How else do you think I put up with you?”

Xiao felt warm in the face at that remark, he only prayed that the darkness of the night hid this from Venti.

Suddenly, Venti’s volume dropped to a whisper and he began to fidget with his fingers. “My conditions were that you had to join the group as well. They want to call the group ‘4NEMO’ and they were still searching for a fourth guy so I figured…”

He trailed off as he caught Xiao staring at him with a bewildered expression. Venti began to panic. Did he just hurt Xiao’s pride? He knew that the taller man didn’t like to accept help from others, but for some reason he thought this time would be different.

Venti was yanked from his thoughts as Xiao closed the distance between them and engulfed him in a hug. “My my, what a sudden show of affection!”

Xiao had did it to keep Venti from seeing the red on his cheek. Truth be told, he was deeply touched by Venti turning down a chance to play more shows if he couldn’t be by his side, but he was too inexperienced at returning kindness. A hug seemed to suffice, right?

“Thank you, Venti, that means the world to me.”

“Does it really?” The words spilled from his mouth before he even finished thinking them. He didn’t want Xiao to agree to something as serious as starting a new idol group with strangers just to appease him.

Xiao pulled away just to lean down and press the softest of kisses to Venti’s lips. The shorter of the two thought his heart was going to explode. Sure, the two had danced around each other for as long as they knew each other and Venti would have been a fool to not notice Xiao’s attractiveness during that time. But they had never been more than friends-who-flirt-with-each-other.

The taller pulled away with a red face as he searched Venti’s eyes. “Does that convince you?”

Venti nodded briskly, his brain not exactly processing what had just happened. It seemed Xiao’s brain was only just then catching up to his actions because he suddenly stepped back and covered his mouth with his hands, his eyes widening to a horrified expression.

“I didn’t--I mean--I--Sorry!” He blurted out from behind his hands.

Venti touched his own lips and blinked a few times before thinking of what to say. “So you really want to be in a group with me, huh?”

Xiao pulled his hands down and while his face was contorted into a snarl, his cheeks still burned red. “And? So what?! Don’t let it go to your head, I just need the money!”

The shorter man giggled and grabbed Xiao’s hand, lacing their fingers together without any resistance. “Sure, whatever you say~”

Despite his harsh tone, Xiao pressed the side of his body next to Venti’s to b closer to him. “So, who are the guys in this group?”

Venti hummed. “Well, the center is this blonde guy named Aether who’s new in town. I heard he’s done some work for Favonius in the past and that he’s friends with the girls in Qixing. The other guy is named Kazuha. He ran with Beidou’s crew for a bit to get away from the whole Tenryou Doxxing drama and now he’s teaming up with Aether to form 4NEMO. I think the manager is Sucrose. You know, Albedo’s manager? She’s picking up the job for this group too.”

“Hmm, impressive. Sounds like a good group. I think I’ll like it.” Xiao looked out to the distance.

Venti beamed. “Wait, you mean it?”

Xiao felt himself turning red again. “Ah, yeah, sure. I know Aether, we did so collab work once, I trust him.”

Venti reached up and poked his cheek. “And because you’ll be dancing with me?”

Xiao grabbed his hand and leaned down again. “I wouldn’t mind getting back into the idol drama if you were by my side. Maybe I just want you.”

The shorter man went red in the face and tried to laugh that last statement off. “Wow, that’s some confession, huh? It’s a good thing I feel the same way, otherwise I’d tease you to death over this.”

Xiao let go and his face dropped into a shocked expression. “You’re serious? You feel the same?”

Venti laughed out loud, hugging his sides. “Yes, dummy! Otherwise I wouldn’t have bothered with all of this! I thought all of that was clear when you kissed me! Gods you are slow!”

Xiao frowned and crossed him arms. “I was just… you’re very hard to read!”

Venti stopped laughing and grabbed the sides of Xiao’s hood, pulling him down to eye level. “And you are like an open book. It’s funny to watch you, Xiao. You can be very suave and smooth with your words, but other times you get all flustered and you close up. It’s cute!”

“I’m not cute.” He didn’t pull away, just adverted his eyes.

Venti made a disagreeing noise and closed the distance between them. This time the kiss was softer, smoother and had much more passion behind it. Venti made a happy noise when he felt Xiao wrap his arms around his back and moved to place his own arms around Xiao’s neck.

Xiao found himself sinking more and more into Venti’s embrace. The taste of cheap wine on his breath, the way his mouth molded to hold him and the way his hands gently caressed the back of his head was all too much for him to handle. His anxieties melted away as he pulled Venti’s smaller frame flush against his own. For just how long had he been waiting to do this? Ever since they met, Venti had always been flirty and open about his emotions, but Xiao had quickly deduced that it was all a mask he put on to keep himself from being hurt by those around him. Xiao was similar in that sense, always acting aloof and angry to keep people from getting too close to him. But when he was with Venti… none of that mattered. When he was with Venti, he didn’t care how badly things ended with Yaksha 5, he didn’t notice the way his ratings dropped, he didn’t pay attention to the social media slandering.

Venti was like some sort of wind spirit: always floating from one place to the other without a concern. Xiao wanted to learn more, to be more like him. And to him, joining this new 4NEMO group was the fastest way to do that.

When they pulled away, Venti did not fail to notice the glimmer of love in Xiao’s gaze. He brought his hands down to Xiao’s waist and hugged him close with a giggle. “You are cute.”

“No I’m not.” Xiao hugged him back with a pout.”

“Yes you are~”

“No I’m not.”

“Yes-s-s-s you are Gao-Xiao!” Venti bit his lip to keep from laughing.

Xiao let go and tried to push him away. “I am going to throw you over the side of this bridge if you call me cute one more time.”

Venti let him go with a smile, a hand fishing into his pocket for his phone. “Then I’ll call Aether and tell him you’re in?”

Xiao’s face went back to the loving smile from before. “Sure thing.”

[imlostinsantacarla]

@daydreamerneko123​ said: Hello, I wanted to make a request for a imagine involving The Lost Boys. How would the boys react to an artist reader drawing them in secret? Due to their shyness and the fact they are just too freaking hot to confront. 🙏 Please and thank you

(a/n: hey lovely! thank you so much for requesting this, as well as for being so patient with me. it took me awhile but i finally got there. sorry that these are shorter, but i hope that you enjoy them nonetheless! - admin kat 🌙❣️)

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

The Lost Boys x Artist Reader Drawing them in Secret Headcanons:

David:

° Being the observant type, David was acutely aware about your little hobby, along with his observant tendencies, he also read your mind. He’s an incredibly smug shit about it and the entire fiasco definitely inflates his ego considerably.

° In order to mess with you, he will remain in the same position for awhile and when you look up to reference him once again, he’s got a cigarette hanging breathtakingly from the side of his simpering mouth, blonde brows raised innocently and in utter humor.

° An immediate sense of embarrassment courses through you, resulting in you dropping your sketchbook rather clumsily.

° That’s when this cobra strikes, stepping from his prized bike and coming over to pick up your sketchbook with such nimble swiftness that it leads to your head spinning wildly.

° David is such a dick about it as well, because instead of returning the sketchbook like a gentleman, he’ll thumb through to pages to find not only one sketch of him, but several!

° Oh, it’s on! He’s teasing the hell out of you until there’s no tomorrow. All in good fun though! David doesn’t want to see you cry... at least not yet.

° “You know, you’re not half bad, actually. But I think you’ll enjoy the real thing much better.”

° This fucker w i n k s afterwards, just like the suave bastard he really is.

° David will flirt with your relentlessly afterwards. You won’t escape from his smooth words and his luscious leathery touches. You’ve peaked his interest after all.

° Prior to this specific occurrence having played out, he had dropped hints that he knew but when you picked up on them, he’d act entirely oblivious, which only confused you further and entertained him profusely.

Dwayne:

° Oh, silent Dwayne with the observant eyes of a hawk! His observant qualities had seriously downgraded themselves in this instance, your form hunched over a sketchbook having gone entirely over his head. It’s safe to say that it literally took him f o r e v e r to figure this one out.

° In fact, Paul had to tell him. Paul! Which honestly indicates something rather big here. Marko and David never let Dwayne live that down. And of course, Paul got teased in the process as well.

° Ignorantly, Dwayne had always assumed you had been drawing the scenery around you. It never occurred in his head that he could ever peak enough interest in someone to become a subject of art. Bruh, has he even seen himself???

° Though now he’s a little a lot curious and he wants to approach you about it.

° So like a slinking panther, he patiently observes and waits for you to look at him, and once you do, he s m i r k s the Big Shit™ and just says nothing!

° Due to your ample amount of embarrassment, you avoid looking up at him for quite some time, though once you deem it to be safe to take a peak, he’s disappeared into thin air, though his buddies are gawking at you like savage simpering wolves.

° “Is that me? That’s pretty good.” A deep voice blossoms in your ear, cold air causing gooseflesh to speckle across your skin like wildfire.

° You have never quite screamed at such a sheer volume than you had in that very moment, my god! And Dwayne couldn’t help but laugh, the other boys cackled wildly from a distance. Though Dwayne wasn’t poking fun at you at all: Yes he found this rather amusing, but he also wasn’t sure how else to respond. But he found it adorable nonetheless.

° With your permission, he goes through your sketchbook, because he’s a Gentleman™!

° As he thumbs through your sketchbook quietly, he discovers one of Laddie and himself, which makes him grin like an idiot! He evens asks if he can keep it, and keep it he does.

Paul:

° One thing that Paul isn’t is observant. Often things like this go straight over his head, though the only reason he noticed your secret sketching sessions of him was because he was checking you out first in all honesty.

° Curiosity practically bounds through his undead veins, mixing that with the his lack of shyness... you’ve got yourself a dangerous concoction that often get’s this vampire into tons of trouble. This dangerous concoction of qualities leads to him coming over.

° How adorable, you’re attempting to hide your sketchbook from him! It’s too bad that he owns the most pesky nimble fingers in existence and snags the book right from you in a swoosh of bountiful laughter. You really stood no chance against him anyway.

° Your feeble attempts at snatching it back from Paul is Childish™, and in response to your embarrassment, Paul cannot hold himself back from holding it above his head and poking a little mean spirited fun at you. This is definitely Paul that we’re discussing here, so are you even surprised at this point?

° Paul lacks the polite boundaries that come along with normal social interactions; either that or he decides to just completely ignore them. So he goes through it right then and there, not being able to resist the urge to throw you flirty comments the entire time. Anything to see you get flustered.

° “I didn’t know I’d bagged myself such a hot fan girl!”

° “At least you got my good side!” Does he really have a good side with that bedhead?

° “Hey, you think next time you could paint me like one of those French Girls?”

° “I can get naked if you want?”

° Paul adores just how shy and flustered you become about it, it provides him with entertainment after all. He’s kind of an ass.

Marko:

° Marko is swift, so it didn’t take him that long to figure out that you were drawing him. Yes, he’s usually up to no good with his best pal Paul, but he’s got incredible brains. He had just been hanging back nonchalantly and planning on how to confront you. Lmaoo what a dork!

° His infamous Cheshire Cat grin is obviously plastered all over his countenance whilst he confronts you about this. Marko is also rather suave, he’s definitely going to flirt with you the entire time this is going down. Winks galore!

° “I’m impressed. The jacket looks like the real thing.”

° Genuine inquisitiveness is activated during the entire encounter, and honestly, Marko is quite abrupt and honest: He asks you in total candidness whether you have a crush on him or not. And even though he’s being candid, you aren’t entirely sure if he’s being serious or making fun of you, because let’s be fair, Marko is rather difficult to read, especially if you’re not close to him just yet.

° “If you did have a crush on me I wouldn’t be complaining.”

° In all honesty, this only gives him more ammunition to flirt with and tease you: Two things that he just loves to do.

° “These are amazing. I’m so glad I no longer have to see the chicken scratches Paul calls masterpieces!”

° Marko inquires a lot on whether he can keep one of your drawings because he is also a Gentleman™, though he has acute tendencies to be a little bastard. He’s friends with Paul, after all.

° As sappy as this sounds, he honestly becomes your biggest fan. The other boys rip into him about it all the time, but he doesn’t mind. You’re good at what you do and even they know it.

° “I could draw you too, but only if you go out on a date with me.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

please like, reblog and follow for more!

requests: closed!

[ghost-in-the-hella]

If you are still taking prompts, and were so inclined, 47 for Gideon the Ninth!

I am always so inclined. Enjoy this... this thing. Gets a bit rude because, well, Gideon.

47. “You look like hell.”

---

“You look like hell.”

Gideon startles at the sound of Coronabeth Tridentarius actually speaking to her. She sounds more intrigued than judgemental, as if hell were an exotic travel destination she’s not yet been to but is eager to learn more about. Gideon is, not for the first time, grateful for her affected vow of silence as all possibility of coherent thought abandons her tongue. She would surely be a stuttering gay mess if she tried to speak to a woman as beautiful as this particular princess of Ida. With her feigned vow, she can still pull off the “strong but silent” affect and at least somewhat salvage the impression of being a suave badass who’s great with the ladies.

Or she could if she weren’t currently a panting, heaving, sweat drenched, bone dust coated, blood smeared, tattered mess.

It figures that Harrow doesn’t even have to be in the same room with Gideon to have completely ruined her game. Gideon draws herself up to her full height and squares her shoulders - fighting the urge to slump into an exhausted heap on the floor - and straightens her crooked aviators. She hopes that her face paint is still a badass skull and not a runny mess of gray; they’re not big on mirrors down in the facility. Her spine stiffens as Coronabeth steps toward her, smiling like they’re sharing a secret, and brushes one perfect hand lightly at each of Gideon’s shoulders, scattering fine chips of bone onto the floor.

“Poor thing,” Coronabeth purrs, locking Gideon in place with intense eye contact even through her shades. “Your necro’s really running you ragged, isn’t she?”

The last thing Gideon wants to talk about while a beautiful woman is touching her - actually touching her! Okay, touching the shoulders of her robes, but still! - is her screeching ferret of a necromancer. Her distaste must show in her expression even through the caked on layers of sweaty paint because Coronabeth chuckles prettily and squeezes her shoulder - Gideon tenses her sick delts reflexively, desperate to please - and gives her a conspiratorial smirk. “That’s alright. I won’t ask you to divulge any forbidden secrets about the Ninth House or the trials.” She runs clever fingers around the hem of Gideon’s hood - a rumpled heap around her neck, having fallen down as she heaved herself up the ladder from the facility in a hurry to get herself to a sonic - and winks suggestively enough that Gideon swallows hard. “She really must be putting you through the ringer. You know, I feel quite sorry for you cavs sometimes. So much is asked of you, and you get so little in return…”

Gideon has passed out. Surely, this must be what has happened. She’ll wake up in her nest of black blankets with a dirty magazine glued to her face by skull paint and drool, completely covered in sticky notes blackened with Harrowhark’s vitriol. Because it sure as hell feels like Coronabeth - Coronabeth Tridentarius, crown Princess of Ida, hottest necromancer this side of the funny books - is flirting with her. With her. Gideon Nav, indentured servant of the Ninth, perpetually demeaned cavalier primary to her lifelong nemesis, hottest cavalier in history to never touch a boob that wasn’t her own. With her stupid, itchy black robes that still smell faintly of Ortus Nigenad’s flop sweat no matter how many times they’re laundered, with her overgrown and uncombed hair all full of cobwebs and bone dust, with her half-melted face paint of a creepy fucking skull not quite concealing her latest acne outbreak. So there’s no fucking way that this isn’t some delightful dream inspired by too many titty mags before bedtime.

Coronabeth’s hand slides down from Gideon’s shoulder, gliding down the length of her arm - trailing over the firm roundness of her deltoid, the jaw-dropping perfection of her biceps, the corded extensor muscles of her forearms - down to seize her calloused hand with her own surprisingly strong one. “I think you deserve something in return. Don’t you?” 

Okay. New thought. Maybe Gideon hasn’t passed out, but she’s probably going to if Coronabeth keeps touching her like this.

Gideon nods very carefully, trying not to let any drool drop from her mouth.

Coronabeth’s smile is as bright as Dominicus. She tugs Gideon’s hand and leads her down an unfamiliar hallway. Gideon follows obediently despite her necromancer’s warnings ringing in her head, shrieking at her to trust no one. Well, Gideon figures, if she’s a lamb being led to the slaughter, at least she’ll die happy. A girl’s holding her hand! Flirting with her! Smiling at her! Touching her muscles! 

Much to Gideon’s surprise, she is not promptly jumped and flesh magicked to death upon entry to the Third’s quarters. In fact, as far as she can tell, she’s alone in them with Coronabeth. Sure, she had to offer up a bit of blood to the gross ward on the door, but she’s already bleeding a little bit from her adventures in the facility anyway so that’s no biggie. 

She’s relieved to note that there are two big, ostentatious beds in addition to the smaller (but no less ostentatious) cavalier bed at the foot of one. If by some miracle she does get laid today, she’d really rather it not be in a bed that Ianthe Tridentarius has also slept or - God forbid - boned in. Coronabeth hustles her past the beds (dang) toward a large and opulent bathroom. “Here, get washed up.”

A fluffy purple towel is thrust into Gideon’s hands, there’s a gentle shove at her shoulders and the click of a door shutting, and suddenly Gideon is alone in the fanciest bathroom she’s ever seen. It’s even more ridiculous than the one in the Ninth’s quarters. She catches her own reflection in the mirror and finds that she looks every inch as confused as she is. “What the fuck?” she mouths to herself.

“I don’t hear washing happening!” comes Coronabeth’s mellifluous voice sing-songing through the door.

Gideon Nav fancies herself a remarkably strong person, the kind of person who could move mountains barehanded if she set her mind to it. Apparently, she has one fatal weakness: a beautiful woman telling her to do, well, literally anything. So Gideon obligingly scours the paint off her face - Harrow’ll be furious, but Harrow’s always furious and her paint’s a mess anyway - and inspects herself once more in the mirror. Sexy. Hot. Gorgeous. Little bit of acne at the hairline and around the left nostril, bit ruddy-cheeked from over-scrubbing, but still a flawless masterpiece of hotness. 

She sniffs her armpits. Pretty sweaty. Are chicks into that? If they’re going to bone (please, please, please) then won’t she get sweaty again anyway?

Wait, are they going to bone? They are, right? They’re alone in Corona’s quarters, her terrifying sister and their insufferable cav have clearly been sent away, and Corona’s super hot and bossing her around and dragging her into her bedroom (well, through her bedroom to her bathroom, but still). If this were one of Gideon’s magazines she'd already be up to her wrist, or at least majorly winning at tonsil hockey. This is literally a textbook scenario for boning.

Okay, then. It’s on. So now what? Should she brush her teeth or something? Her breath’s probably pretty rank after the morning she’s had. Should she, like… shave stuff? 

“You may draw a bath, if you like,” Corona calls through the door again. “Ianthe and Babs will be gone for hours. And something tells me that you have never been pampered.”

And so Gideon ends up taking the first ever bath of her life in the gilded bathtub of the Third. She can’t bring herself to fill the tub more than a couple of inches, even though from her skin mags and her comics she knows a bath is usually filled until the person in it is all but drowning, or at least until the bubbles are tastefully covering the good bits (comics) or just barely not covering them (skin mags). She does throw in several of the weird perfumy things hanging out around the tub at Corona’s urging. By the end of it, she’s pretty sure she’s dirtier than when she stepped in except that now she’s filthy with scented soaps and salts and glittery “bath bombs” (surprisingly not that violent but also surprisingly messy) instead of sweat and blood. She scrapes and scrubs at herself and then gives her body and her clothes a good shake out in the sonic for good measure. She borrows some toothpaste and uses her finger as a toothbrush, then rinses with borrowed mouthwash. 

There’s a fluffy purple and gold robe that smells a bit like Corona’s perfume and seems the right size, so even though it’s a million miles off from her usual aesthetic she consents to shrug it on. It’s impossibly soft and warm and smooth. Stops a bit short on her thighs, but presumably that won’t get any complaints.

When she steps back out into the Third’s quarters, Gideon feels strangely vulnerable without her protective layer of filth. She smells like a stranger, and her fingertips and toes are wrinkled in a weird way that she assumes has to do with the bath bombs or maybe with how hard she was scrubbing. That, or she’s picked up some freaky skin disease from the Third’s bathtub. She hopes she’s not about to die or something.

Corona looks beyond delighted to see her emerge, ruddy and steaming, from the bathing chamber in her ludicrous little bathrobe. It’s a shame that it’s short on the leg coverage and heavy on the arm coverage, since Gideon’s legs are fucking awesome but not nearly as impressive as her guns. She wants to ask what Corona has planned for her now, but her stupid oath to Harrow stays her tongue. If all goes well, Coronabeth might have a better use for her tongue than words, anyway. So instead she stands there trying to look impressive rather than panicky and overstimulated.

“Come here,” Corona beckons with an elegant finger, her eyes glittering like shards of polished amethyst. Gideon’s pretty sure that Corona’s not using any necromantic tricks on her - she knows what that shit feels like by now, and it’s vastly unpleasant - but she follows her gesture as inexorably as if Corona were looping a leash of thanergy around her throat and dragging her closer. 

And then Coronabeth Tridentarius is touching her. Like, pretty much everywhere. “Hmmm, let’s see,” she murmurs thoughtfully as she palpates what feels like every trembling inch of Gideon’s being (apart from the good bits, but maybe this is what foreplay is? she’s heard of it, but her magazines usually skip straight to the main event). Instead of trying to think, Gideon focuses on feeling, which is much more in her wheelhouse.

Corona’s nimble fingers carding through her damp red locks (they could stand a trim), fingernails sending tingles through her scalp as they scratch gently against skin that’s never been touched in kindness before. Fingertips trailing down the strong line of her jaw, gently seizing her square chin and turning her face to every possible angle, her gaze as palpable as her fingers. Strong hands (how does the Princess of Ida have actual calluses on her fingers?) testing her muscles, examining her hands and paying particular attention to her fingernails (they could also stand a trim).

“You look good in my robe,” Corona announces, taking a step back and allowing Gideon to breathe for what feels like the first time since she set foot in her quarters. “Gold suits you.” She locks eyes with Gideon and quirks her lips into a subtle smirk. “Gold suits you very well.”

Gideon swallows hard, trying not to gulp audibly and concentrating on not sweating through her borrowed robe.

“Much better than black. Not that you look bad in black, mind you, but there are other colors that would be much more flattering for your lovely complexion.”

She takes Gideon by the hand and leads her over to an over-decorated table that Gideon observes is overflowing with cosmetics. “For example… Hmmm… Plum?” Corona holds up a tube of something that’s a deep, bruised purple, examining its contrast with Gideon’s skin. “Or perhaps mauve…”

Coronabeth is insatiable. Gideon is left exhausted. When she finally emerges from the Third House’s quarters (very much not laid), hours have passed and she feels as if she has run a marathon. Not from any outward exertion, but from the effort of holding still and keeping silent throughout the whole ordeal.

She is perhaps the most sexually frustrated she has ever been in her life, having never been touched by a woman (and what a woman!) so much before, or really at all before unless she counts herself or the shriveled crones of the Ninth.

She is also… well. Made over. Her hair has been combed and styled, and it reeks of hair gel almost as badly as Naberius Tern’s does on an average day. Her nails have been trimmed, filed, and buffed smooth before being painted a soft lilac and accented with shimmering gold. Her face has been rendered utterly unrecognizable; Harrowhark would likely envy the sheer amount of makeup on it if only it were in the design of a skull rather than whatever peacocky nonsense Coronabeth’s done to it. She is, at least, in her own black robes despite Coronabeth’s best efforts to get her to borrow some of Babs’s gaudy frippery.

She suspects she has, in fact, been fucked by the Third after all.

She slinks down the hall as stealthily as she can manage, thanking her lucky stars that her necro is probably half-dead in a bone or buried up to her pointy little goblin ears in ancient books or possibly both rather than being a normal, decent human being who might give a fuck where her cavalier has vanished off to for hours on end with one of her greatest rivals. She’s hoping that everyone else in Canaan House will be equally preoccupied and that she’ll be able to return to the safety of her chambers with her dignity at least partially intact when she rounds a corner and nearly faceplants directly into the solid mass of Camilla the Sixth.

Gideon draws herself up to her fullest and most imposing posture and tries to mask her humiliation as best she can. Camilla observes her cooly, but Gideon swears her fellow cav is just barely holding back a laugh. 

After a small but excruciating eternity in limbo, Camilla steps aside to let Gideon dart gratefully past. Camilla casts a few words over her shoulder as Gideon passes, and they follow her burning ears all the way down the hall and back to her quarters: “You look like hell, Nav.”

[excitedlysuffering]

OMGOMGOMG possibly Kakashi head-cannon collection? He is the love of my life (lmao don’t tell my bf that)

Your secrets safe with me he’s my love too😂

Kakashi Headcanons Collection

What He Looks For In A S/O~

• A reader, they don’t have to read Icha Icha (bonus points if you did) but someone who appreciates a good book

• Someone laid back and not very high maintenance

• I see him wanting a shinobi S/O cause he needs them to be to take care of themselves or he’ll worry too much

• he’ll worry anyways

• Someone who understands his pain and won’t shy away from him when he’s going through a rough patch

• Someone who is good with words, like say something sweet and he’s metlinggg

• A person with considerate personality traits

• He would like an S/O who’s willing to try new things and adventures

• Someone who would take things slowly

• Someone who could honestly make him laugh

• He’s DadKashi he’s going to want someone good with kids

• To be frank, he would probably want a relatively stable S/O so that in his mind there’s no chance of them ending up like his father

• He wants companionship so someone who’s not distant and who wouldn’t mind him being around all the time

• I really can’t see him with a tsundere S/O, he needs to see that his partner loves him as much as he loves them

Relationship With Kashi Stuff~

• Please do domestic stuff (Sending him off to work with a kiss, a note in his lunchbox, kissing him when he gets home) he will be near tears every time

• TEAMWORK MAKES THE DREAM WORK™ (whether it’s kicking butt, making dinner, or teaching (raising) Team 7)

• You probably won’t notice moving in with each other until you look up like ‘holy crap I haven’t been to my apartment in like 2 weeks?’

• Read with him or read to him, and you will have his HEART

• He’s not clingy per se, but he loves to be in your presence whenever he can

• Will take you out on dates once a week EVERY WEEK (Sorry Tsunade-sama, I have a date then, but I’ll leave right after?)

• Dating Kakashi means you’re now honorary rivals with Gai (who knows Kashi better, who can make him laugh most etc.)

• Pick up line wars 24/7, the loser has to do the other’s chores Kakashi wins

• Okay, but Kakashi never had a childhood, so make a list of everything he never got to do and you slowly complete them together

• He’s such a sweetheart like, surprise, he’s so sensitive

• Get’s so flustered seeing you in his clothes, he temporarily shuts down

• He’s given up trying to take back his mask whenever you’re wearing it

• Okay, we all know this silver-haired hottie is suave, but he is SMOOTH, he will 100% find ways to have you blush whenever possible, he is the CEO of leaving you hot and bothered

• Made you your own area in the Hokage office as a hint that he needed your company

• Has never forgotten an important date (he uses his Sharingan on the calendar)

• He’s fought demons and other crazy villains, but will still be terrified of you on your period (he’s brave tho he’ll just bring a lot of peace offerings)

• He heard you refer to him as DadKashi in front of Team 7 and/or your friends and just about loses his mind

• When you first see his face without his mask you’re probably pissed cuz WHY would he hide that beauty from the world?! it’s for the greater good hun

How To Lose/Annoy Him~

• Being insensitive/ignorant about things like loss or mental illness

• Constantly distracting him from his duties or hobbies

• Being rude or uncompassionate

• Being willing to abandon people or being self-centered you SCUM

• He always makes time for you, so he’d be a bit bothered if they didn’t put forth any effort to spend time with him

• Little pranks are harmless, but things that make him scared for your wellbeing or stealing his mask are big fat NO

• Being reckless just because, being a shinobi is already dangerous with would you play with death like that??

• Being lazy, Kakashi at his core is really something of a go-go-go person, he doesn’t want to just do anything all the time

Soft Kakashi Things~

• Kakashi is such a softie omg

• He likes to fall asleep last just so he can tell you how much he loves you and you saved him while you’re asleep

• If you’re having a bad day, he’ll drop everything (if possible) to hold you and be there for you in every way you need

• Definitely has Sai draw a small pic of you so he can carry it around and/or put in the Hokage office

• Mission dates are a thing like imagine flirting with Kakashi while destroying your opponents (so romantic)

• He’s big on practical gifts. If he notices you’re running low on shuriken? Expect a box of them from him

• He’ll read a particular *wild* Icha Icha quote to you just to make you flustered (bonus points for him if you’re in public)

• His students question you all the time like how did you end up with their lonely, pervy sensei?

• Will sweep you off your feet for no reason other than he likes to hold you and carry you

Random Kashi Facts~

• Kakashi’s love language is words of affirmation like he craves hearing that you love him and the like

• He hums and sings around the house or whenever he’s bored or preoccupied

• After having eating fish out of necessity day after day he prefers not eating it if possible

• He will often fall asleep a good while after he actually lays down because he enjoys debriefing himself of everything that happened during the day

• Actually sleeps really deep when he’s next to you, otherwise, the smallest sound can wake him up

• He likes to put notes or letters from you in his Icha Icha books so he can read them whenever and no one will peak cuz ew, Icha Icha

• In all honesty, Gai is a common factor in why he’s so late everywhere, but it’s mostly him walking around and taking in the sights like a nostalgic old man

• In the episode where Sakura and Naruto transformed into kids and called Kashi and old man, giving him an identity crisis is actually common. His hair color and the fact that you can’t see his face make some kids think he’s old

• Sometimes when he can’t sleep he’ll find a random tree and fall asleep in it (he’s a strange one)

• He lost his newest Icha Icha book when he was Hokage and very nearly (thanks to Shikamaru) called a citywide search party

Little Things~

Favorite:

• Place to kiss- Your temple, it feels really intimate to him and he’s so tall it’s an easy place for him

• Way to hug- Kakashi loves those giant bear hugs where he just envelopes you like you’re basically one with him now

•’Thing to do with you- He really loves reading with you, whether it’s the same book, or you’re just both sitting next to each other reading

• Type of date- Although your most common date is a mission date (lol), his favorite is being able to take you to a nice restaurant and then on a walk around the city

This or That:

• He’s a winter person actually, he loves being cuddled up with you and blankets, and the abundance of hot drinks

• He’s a morning person because he’s been waking up early since he was a child, and doesn’t really know how to enjoy sleeping anymore (but if that wasn’t the case he’d be a night owl)

• Loves both cooking for you and being cooked for he puts Bobby Flay to shame honestly

• He spends all his time reading obviously and if his S/O is a writer or he’ll be soooo excited and will read everything they put out

Conflict Happenings~

• He knows disagreements are a normal part of relationships (in moderation of course) so if there was a real problem, he wouldn’t shy away from it

• He won’t raise his voice or take a tone with you, he doesn’t feel the need to, but he will definitely get his point across

• To his fault, he might throw in a slight or cutting remark here and there but he will regret it the second your expression changes

• He’s a real go with the flow kind of guy so if he realizes that something is his fault, he will correct it ASAP

• If he notices you’re getting really worked up, he’ll just hug you until you calm down and can speak coherently but at that point it’s like ‘what was I mad about??’

• If his S/O is headstrong it’ll probably bring that side out in him, even if temporarily

• If it’s a minor disagreement he’ll probably say something funny to diffuse the situation

• He would rather die than argue in public, to him it’s a private thing and he hates causing a scene

Modern Kashi~

• I can see him as more of a club/extracurricular activities leader than a teacher

• He’s really close to those kids in his group and probably sheds a few proud DadKashi tears at their graduation

• That one fine teacher that all the students are thirsting over

• If not a teacher he’d probably be an elite CIA agent or a higher ranking FBI officer

• He has so many dogs like he sees a stray and how could he possibly give them up??

• He’d probably walk around Playboy Magazines just cause he can

• At one point he dyed his hair black cause he thought it’d look more ‘normal’ but he HATED it

• He likes plants but he’s so bad at taking care of them?? He can remember all of his dogs’ names and their food preferences but can’t remember to water a plant

• His house is so clean he’s been doing all his household chores since he was a child

• He definitely met Gai in elementary school and they never parted, even going on to become college roommates never again

• Gai probably barges in Kakashi’s classroom so often he’s most likely considered the co-leader/teacher

• Kakashi has definitely gotten drunk on school nights before but he’s such an in-control drunk no one ever noticed

• Kakashi was my first Naruto love and my first husband. BACK OFF

Masterlist

[this-is-my-procrastination]

Hi! I just read your headcannons for shy/easily-flustered!Mc (it was so cute I loved it!!) How about the opposite? A suave cool headed Mc? Love Your writing ^^ 💖💖💖💖

the arcana main 6 w/ a calm, smooth mc

MC is so chill in these haha, but I hope that I did your cute request justice, anon! Also thank youuu, those words mean so much to me :’)

Asra:

You being a cool-headed person would intrigue Asra

He wants to figure you out, and he will find every little thing that flusters you or makes you lose your composure

Asra does really admire how unbothered you are though, and he’ll praise you often because he knows others tend to be more high-strung

He needs someone easygoing because of his own laid-back nature, and he would enjoy just going with the flow alongside his darling

Amused when he makes a flirty remark and you don’t really react

He’ll laugh it off like it was expected, but then he’ll slowly escalate until he’s making some very intimate, loving comments

He’s just trying to get a rise out of you, but when you make suave comments back, he’ll get a bit embarrassed

A very relaxed relationship overall; his carefree nature will rub off on you and y’all will just chill

You two take naps together often, just enjoying each other’s presence

Julian:

This man’s already a suave dude, so this would be a very amusing couple to watch

Cute banter for days because you both don’t take yourselves too seriously and trust each other implicitly

Julian will be disappointed when his flirting doesn’t make you lose your composure, but he basically takes it as a challenge

He’ll throw his back out trying to fluster you, impress you, or otherwise get a cute reaction from you

One time at the Rowdy Raven, he was really drunk and climbed up on a table, professing his undying love for you

That got a reaction out of you, but probably more of an angry one

He still gloated for hours about how you ended up blushing and that the pink tinting your adorable cheeks was caused by the one and only Julian Devorak himself

When he gets into trouble, you’re always there to bail him out

And while he can sometimes get caught off guard, you being really cool-headed and good under pressure would help his case for sure

Julian fondly calls you his partner in crime, and he makes sure there’s never a dull moment when you’re with him

Nadia:

Power couple af

Nadia is also a really calm person, so the both of you would honestly make such an elegant, slightly intimidating pair

That would work great in a royal setting though

Nadia loves winding down a stressful day by sipping tea with you

I feel like massages would also be a big thing in this relationship, where you both just chill as you help her relax by getting rid of the knots in her shoulders

You feel very serene in each other’s presence, and when she’s surrounded by chaos and people vying for her attention, your at-ease vibe would remind her to relax

Since you’re so easygoing, she also really enjoys showering you in gifts and dressing you in extravagant, excellently designed clothes

When you go to any royal events or dances, she’s always super proud of you for getting along so easily with the aristocrats

They can be pretty snobby, but your unfazed nature lets you fit in and impress them

It’s a huge relief to her because she knows you can handle yourself

You can even help her negotiate royal matters, which gets rid of so many stresses she had as she realizes that she doesn’t have to shoulder the burden of running a country alone anymore

Portia:

Make this girl blush !

Your chillness would be a nice break for her because she already has to deal with Julian’s antics

Rolls her eyes at your pick-up lines, but she blushes every time

Super talkative so you being pretty chill and clear-headed would make you a great conversation partner

You both love talking late into the night, just talking about life and any recent drama Portia’s gotten involved in

Adores that you actually listen to her and offer good advice

Your easygoing nature would also be great for when you go along with her antics

Because you will get roped in somehow, she’s got them Devorak genes

Portia loves getting into a little mischief with you

You’re also both great under pressure so that if you get caught, y’all can almost always smooth-talk your way out of it

A super fun relationship where you bounce off each other and can chat about anything

Lucio:

First of all, Lucio would show you off every chance he gets

“Look at my s/o! I bet you wish you could have an s/o as perfect as them, but too bad for you because they’re already mine!”

Cue the arrogant smirk and confident arm slung around your shoulders

He might take your cool-headed nature as ignoring him sometimes, so he’ll make sure to pout and complain when he feels neglected

Lucky for him, you’re a chill person so you’ll just laugh and try to satisfy him with a kiss

Not enough for him lol, he’ll just cling onto you more, sweeping you into his arms to try and get more of your attention

He’ll grin cheekily, proclaiming that you’re the only one worthy of his attention so you better appreciate it (ignoring the fact that he’s the one begging)

Lucio tends to be pretty emotional, so your even temper makes the both of you really compatible

You often check him, hitting him with the cold, hard facts and logic so he doesn’t get carried away with his moodiness

He’ll pout and whine, but then you’ll wink and hint that you feel like cuddling right about now

He immediately perks up, lifts you into his arms, and practically races back home so he can finally bask in your attention

Muriel:

Muriel would adore you because he would be drawn to a calmer s/o that can understand his reservedness

You’re good at sensing his feelings and respecting his boundaries, so he’d be able to feel really comfortable with you

When Muriel goes into public with you, your presence does a lot to help him feel more safe and secure

He’ll squeeze your hand tightly and keep you as close to him as humanly possible

Your communication skills also help him feel calmer as he sees your relaxed and charming behavior when you talk to others

If he freezes up or gets overwhelmed, you shoot him an easy smile and give his hand a reassuring squeeze to encourage him

There would be so many warm moments and quiet conversations where you just get deep with each other, talking about anything and everything

Muriel still has trouble expressing his emotions, so you’ll have to take the initiative and gently coax him into cuddles with a sweet smile

Your occasional flirty remark will catch him off guard, but it definitely  keeps him on his toes

He might act bothered, but he secretly loves those moments because it reaffirms that you want him

[mlqcconfessions]

how would the boys react if they found out mc was OBSESSED w dating sims? (what if mc’s virtual husbando is the literal opposite of them??)

Hello hello everyone! It’s been a while! I’m slowly getting readjusted to normal life, and that means.....RESUMING THE HEADCANONS!

MLQC Headcanon - I can be your otome husbando

*This is with the impression that there are only 3 main guys in the game (excluding Shaw)

Victor

You’ve recently been attached to this new otome game

Mr. Love Queen’s Choice (!)

It has everything (the art, the boys, the story, the BOYS)

All the boys are great, but your eyes are stuck on Kiro in particular

He’s so sweet? He’s so fluffy?

A. Literal. Sunshine Boy.

Victor takes notice of your new obsession

He’s a little frustrated at this (your attention is headed somewhere else now)

He blames it on the game (but of course doesn’t say it to your face)

One day he walks in to the room and finds you

You have your phone glued to your ear, smiling like there’s no tomorrow

Victor was planning on just ignoring this phenomenon (he didn’t want to know what was up anyways)

But a faint voice stops him in his tracks

“Miss Chips!”

Miss...what? (he hears a thud)

When he turns around, he finds you crouched on the floor (your hands are covering your face)

“MC!”

He dashes to your side, voice a little shaky

“Victor......”

He helps you get up, but your legs won’t cooperate (he crouches next to you instead)

“What is it, MC?”

“Victor.....he....he’s.....”

“Who’s he?” (Victor takes out his phone to call 911)

“Kiro.....”

Kiro?

“He’s so adorable, Victor! I can’t handle his cuteness!!”

.......

He hangs up his phone and gets up to leave the room

He lets out a huge sigh, rubbing his temples in annoyance

He contacts Elex the next day to discuss their......marketing techniques

Kiro

Lately Kiro’s been busy promoting his new comeback

So you weren’t able to spend much time with him nowadays

To ease your loneliness, he suggests you find some games to download (he thought you would play some Tamagotchi or something)

That was your plan too, at least in the beginning

You stumble across an ad for Mr. Love Queen’s Choice, and immediately go to the app store (sorry, Tama)

You start the game and are shooketh at the visuals

“Kiro, look at this!”

“? What is this?”

“Remember how you told me I should play some games? Well I found this one...and I really like it!”

“Hmmm......” (he looks intently at your phone screen)

You’re hoping the fact that it’s a dating game doesn’t matter

“You...don’t mind...do you?”

“Hmm? Of course not!”

He would regret this later

You become so immersed in this game that you basically have a second boyfriend

Lucien? Why is he only 2D?

He’s so suave and smooth (you were used to the bubbly sunshine Kiro, but not smexy smart professor LuLu)

Kiro’s so pouty now

He makes Savin play through the game so he can know exactly who stole his lady sunshine

He spends real money (that he earned!) so he can buy all the karma from events and top-ups

He has like 20K gems

You’re so frustrated at this

He spoils all the dates for Lucien (you have to literally cover his mouth to make him stop)

Now you’re the one pouting (he hands over his account as an apology you readily accept)

Lucien

He already knew about your otome life

And the fact that you played through every single game available at one point

He’s not someone who would judge you for that

But that doesn’t mean he’s feels no jealousy

So he does some research before you could try out this new one, Mr. Love Queen’s Choice

Little to his surprise, you fall head over heels for Gavin (something about that soft puppy just reels you in)

He actively engages in conversations with you about Gavin

After all, you’ve never looked so enthusiastic

He watches you play through MLQC

He already knows what’s going to happen in the main story, but doesn’t say a word to you

But if you’re having trouble understanding the plot, he’s more than happy to explain everything

As time goes on, you’re becoming more engrossed in this game than he would’ve liked

Every time it’s windy you keep saying stuff about Gavin

Gavin this, Gavin that

“MC, are you trying to make me jealous?”

“.....no?”

Actually you were (ever since he allowed that female professor to openly flirt with him)

He realizes right away, so there’s no point in bluffing

“Ah, I see” (he goes over to his phone)

“Hello Professor Evans, can I talk to you for a moment?”

Evans? Evans?! That woman from school?

“Yes, about that dinner date tomorrow—”

You take his phone away from him and go to press the end call button

His phone is off

“........Lucien”

He pats your head before going to the bedroom

“Good night, MC” (he’s not even trying to hold back his smile)

Gavin (Spoilers for recent chapters)

He didn’t like leaving you alone for extended periods of time (for more than one reason)

But he was assigned to a long-term mission with Eli and the other agents

There wasn’t anything he could do about it (it frustrated him more than you)

He finally returned home after a month, exhausted (and INJURED) as ever

He walks in through the door, half-expecting you to jump into his arms (he’s getting ready to catch you)

To his surprise, you’re sitting on the couch with your knees pulled to your chest

It looks like you’re on the phone with someone (you hardly noticed him come in)

He’s a little pouty, but completely understands that it must be an important call

He takes off his jacket and swoops down to give you a kiss

But he notices you’re not actually on the phone, but crying

CRYING?!

“MC! What’s wrong?”

“....Gavin....” (you wrap your arms around his neck)

He tightly hugs you back, brushing your hair in attempts to calm you down

“It’s okay....tell me what happened”

“He...he forgot me.....”

“He? Who forgot you?” (he was about to throw hands)

“Vi...Victor.....”

“Victor? Is he a friend of yours?”

“No....(you show him one of Victor’s karmas on your phone)....from Mr. Love Queen’s Choice”

Is this.....a 2D male?

“And after all we’ve been through....”

You cover yourself with a nearby blanket, leaving Gavin to take in this situation by himself

Birdcop is highly confused

He can’t explain this gut feeling, but this Victor guy seems like a jerk

It’s still going to take me a while to get used to writing again, but this was a good ask! 

[wlw-lovestruck-fiction]

Can we get some Ada love? Like her and MC cuddling on the couch or maybe having a few drinks at Ada's bar after a long day? I don't even care which I just her to get appreciated

No matter how much Fiona insists that you are doing a wonderful job in the Ward, you can’t help but feel that you aren’t doing much. All of them are focused on what needs to be done and the best way to do it. In contrast to their methodical, efficient tactics, you tackled problems like a chaotic force of nature, barely giving it time to exist but certainly not solving it at all.

Not in Kellan’s opinion, anyway. To you, they looked as solved as they could get.

This discrepancy in opinions resulted in long, long discussions that left you more than a little frustrated. This night was no different. No sooner have you stepped out of the Ward that you make a beeline for Ada’s bar, grumbling to yourself. There’s no one to accompany you tonight, but you don’t mind one bit.

It’s a welcome opportunity to be alone with Ada.

Or, well, as alone as you can be in a bar full of people Ada must occasionally tend to. You’ll enjoy what you can get.

“Evening, everyone.” You say, masking your foul mood with a charming smile. Most of the patrons turn to greet you, but your attention is instantly drawn to the slender chestnut-haired bartender moving gracefully through the mass of bodies. She’s a true sight to behold, spinning this way and that while still maintaining a careful grip on the tray full of drinks she’s carrying.

Soon, the grin on your face is anything but forced. Ada has this ability to make anyone’s day better with just her presence and witty charm. The drinks she serves are merely a nice bonus.

She turns in your direction as soon as she hears your voice, beaming, her grin as brilliant and radiant as the very sun. She gestures towards the counter and then continues to deliver the drinks she still has.

You don’t wait for long – soon she’s slipping behind it, already reaching for the ingredients to make your usual drink.

“How are you holding up, Snowdrop?” She asks, voice like honey, thick and rich and so very sweet, so very warm. It chases the last vestiges of your fight with Kellan away, yet you can't help but notice the slight slump in her shoulders, her tired eyes, and the way her usual vibrant movements seem much more drained.

“Better than you, it seems. Long day?”

Ada throws the group in the back of the bar a weary look. “You could say that.”

“Anything I can do to help?”

“Just dally like you usually do. I could use the company.”

“Oh?” You lean forward. “Are you saying I can’t help you mix some drinks? You need to have some faith in me, Ada. I’m quite good with my hands.”

Ada pauses, eyes flicking upwards to meet yours, glinting with faint amusement.

“Are you, now? I’ll need a demonstration, Snowdrop.” Her grin turns even more playful when you produce a coin, making the movement linger if only to stretch the moment a little more. She tracks your hand with sharp attention, looking vaguely impressed when you deftly move it between your fingers. She laughs. “Well, I’m never questioning your skills again, that’s for sure.”

A loud shout rings from the back, and Ada’s beautiful, beautiful expression crumbles like a deck of cards, her lips thin with annoyance.

“If they are any louder, they will bring down the whole place.” She grumbles, and quickly finishes making the drinks. Her expressions softens when she catches your gaze again, apologetic. “Give me a minute-”

She freezes in shock when you shot out of your seat, hand already moving to the forgotten tray by your side.

“No, you stay here. I’ll help.”

“But you-”

“Won’t spill anything, I promise. My luck might be bad but my reflexes more than make up for it.”

“Snowdrop, I-”

“Watch me.”

While you aren’t nowhere near as graceful as she is, you have no trouble navigating the sea of limbs and hats in record time. You meet her gaze from across the room once you deliver the drinks, smug, and she merely shrugs, fond.

“Well.” She says once you get back at her side. It’s a short, sharp sound, like the tap of a boot across the dance floor, full of energy she didn’t have before. “Better get moving, then, Snowdrop. We have a long night ahead of us.”

…

Hours later, after the first rays of sunlight chase the last of the patrons away, Ada lets herself drop in one of the tables in front of her counter with a long sigh.

“You doing okay?” You ask, softly, putting the glass you were cleaning away.

Ada groans. “Been almost two days. If it weren’t for coffee, I’d… well, no, I’m probably a zombie right now.”

Zombie. You grimace, recalling the revelation the Ward had given you not too long ago. Vampires, demons, mystics, ghosts…

What if zombies-

You quickly shove that thought out of your mind, disturbed by its very existence. Your mind quickly latches onto a more interesting subject, namely the way Ada’s hair, now out of its bun, gleams beautifully if the light hits it just right. It’s a river of coppery gold falling down her shoulders, brushing her back with light, dizzying touches, drawing your attention to the tattoos she has there and oh, she’s too gorgeous and you are too sleep-deprived to function properly.

The glass you were distractedly trying to put in place clicks abruptly with another, and Ada snaps her head in your direction, startled by the sound.

Her eyes quickly find yours.

Your mind scrambles for a smooth recover, but Ada is already smirking before you can even think.

“Careful with the glass, Snowdrop. Wouldn’t want an excuse to punish you, after-” She tries to go for a suave remark and fails miserably, cut off by a yawn. You can’t help but chuckle at her mortified expression, cheeks tinted pink.

“I might come here and break a glass later.”

“Maybe I’ll regain my ability to flirt by then.” She mumbles, finally, getting to her feet with unsteady movements. Then she pauses and throws you another look, suddenly contemplative. You raise an eyebrow, intrigued.

“What? Are you considering hiring me?”

“Nothing of the sort, Snowdrop. You already have a job, remember?”

The detail had been thoroughly forgotten after seeing how tired Ada was yesterday, overwhelmed by the intense desire to help. It’s not like you can be blamed, though, you’ve only been in the job for less than a week and it already looks like Kellan wants to fire you, anyway, never mind the fact that you are a witch.

But you did, technically, have a job. Joy.

The reminder makes you aware of how exhausted you are. You rub your temple, frustrated.

“Right. That. Honestly, I don’t think it’ll work out.”

Ada snorts. “Yeah, I was intrigued when Sascha mentioned you were going to join the Ward. Never thought I’d see a thief there.”

“So… does than mean I can work here when I inevitably get fired?”

“I wouldn’t complain.” She yawns again, and smiles tiredly. “Anyway, the Ward is a tough job, plus you had to pull an all-nighter because of me. And we are quite far away from Donna’s place, so… you could…” She trails off, suddenly bashful, looking at the side. It’s a strange look on her, because she is usually so effortlessly confident, but it doesn’t stop the rush of warmth affection that courses through you at the sight. “You can sleep here, if you’d like.”

Your heart leaps to your throat, insistent, thumbing so loudly you fear she can hear it.

“I’d love to.”

Ada is beaming before you can even finish, hand already slipping between yours, leading you away from the counter and upstairs, to her small apartment. It’s remarkably cozy, away from the loudness of the world.

“How many hours do you have?” Ada asks, curiously.

“Probably three before Fiona or Cecilia turn the whole town on its head to find me.”

And either of them would find you straight away. The joys of the Otherworld knew no bounds, that’s for sure.

“They will be the best three hours of your life, I promise.” She laughs when you smirk at her, swatting your arm. “To rest, of course. Really, I can’t see you in the Ward with that mind of yours.”

“And Sascha?”

“Sascha is. Well. Sascha.” She pauses. “How are either of you in the Ward, again?”

“How is anyone but Cecilia, you mean.”

“They have their responsible moments.” A shrug, and then she’s pulling you straight into the bed. You fall in a tangle of limbs neither of you wants to break. Ada’s voice turns softer, full of wonder. “And then there’s you. Pure, untamable chaos. And you chose to waste your night away working with me instead of resting.”

“Being with you it’s fun.”

Her eyes are falling shut. She blinks sleepily. “Say, Snowdrop? I don’t want to pretend there’s nothing between us.”

All week has been nothing but teasing and flirting, sparking interest, igniting it with a touch, then watch it flicker while both of you tried to see what the other would do, how you should respond…

And here’s Ada, half-asleep, throwing it all out of the window with one direct sentence. You laugh. It’s a very Ada thing to do.

“I don’t want to, either.”

“Wonderful.” She murmurs, and itches closer, humming softly when you hug her and pull her close. “Will I see you tonight?”

“Every night, unless the Ward sends me to the desert or something similar.”

“Right, the Ward. Sure, okay… I can work with that…”

She’s out in seconds, there in your arms, breathing softly. You smile, happier than you’ve been in ages. You can’t wait to see how everything will turn out.

[cherryplasmids]

☆ opportunities ☆

pairing: nick jakoby x reader fandom: bright—after movie sequence anon request: You could write anything about Nick Jakoby , especially something sexy , and I would be super happy!! 😈😈 notes: NSFW (don’t be silly, wrap your willy)  (this is my second smut piece, my first with a male character so please don’t roast me for this)

—check out my other works; masterlist

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

           After another tiring day filled with paperwork, one arrest, and nasty insults, Nick just about had it. Even after he saved the world (along with Ward), the working conditions within the Los Angeles Police Department remained the same. Day in and day out, he's being overlooked for serious cases to do intern filing. The harassment has dwindled a tad bit since Pollard had been disposed of, but Nick still feels the suppression by his peers and superiors. No matter what he does, it'll never be enough.

The only good thing about being the only Orc is the fact that he can do nightly patrols alone. He can listen to smooth jazz or orcish metal without Ward bugging him about it. The thoughts swirling in his head can be sifted through in quiet. There's plenty of endless opportunities he can grasp onto during night patrols.

One of those opportunities is the chance to speak to you without Ward pestering him to hurry up. No, the nighttime allowed Nick to savor a few, undisturbed moments with you before he clocks out.

By the time Nick pulls up to the bodega you work in, it's a downpour with thunder in the background. Surprisingly, the usual shining yellow lights are completely out and the front of the store is closed up. Nick looks down at the dashboard where the red digital clock shines: 11:37 pm. His forehead furrows. The bodega's closing time is 1 am, not 11 pm. It's odd and a bit saddening. Nick deflates at the missed opportunity to see your gorgeous smile. Even more so when he realizes he has tomorrow off.

He'll wait for the next chance.

Putting on the windshield on the fastest mode, Nick peels out of the sidewalk and continues his patrol. He has less than half an hour left on his shift. He'll make the best of it by driving slow since the usual bodies walking the streets were gone to avoid being drenched. The thunder calmed his sadness as he drove. However, he noticed someone walking the streets. Ward's voice automatically rang through his brain, ‘don't be too nice, it only causes problems.’

But when did Nick ever truly listen to Ward's negativity? No, he wasn't going to let someone potentially get pneumonia. So he pulls over to the shaking figure whose umbrella is practically broken. It doesn't shield the person from the rain at all.

Nick rolls down the window. "Excuse me!" The person halts and turns to him. He can't see who they are through the blankets of rain. "Would you like a ride? Can't have you getting sick."

Their head frantically nods before bolting inside his vehicle. Instead of sitting in the backseat, they slide into the front with him. "Nick, you are my guardian angel."

At the voice, Nick freezes. He knows it better than he knows most protocols for his job. Like a bee flocking to fresh flowers after a rainy day, he constantly attempts to be around that voice for rejuvenation. But that only happens when he's prepared to see you. He needs to hype himself up before speaking to you. After he saw the bodega closed, the energy simmered down to calmness. Now, he's anxious because the pep talk motivation is all gone. He knows he'll just make a right fool of himself in front of you.

You begin to shed your soaked jacket and the cardigan underneath before throwing them on the car floor along with your side purse. After squeezing out the excess water from your hair, you turn to greet Nick with a smile. It takes a lot of willpower for Nick not to stare at your hardened nipples.

"Hey," His voice cracks and he wants to die. "What were you doing walking in this storm?"

You dramatically threw yourself on the backrest before huffing. "Fernando told me to head home early because of the rain, but he fucking forgot to pick me up. Talking about being busy and shit. We all know he's too busy fucking Maria. I wanted to call Daryl but it's practically midnight and I know he would drag me through the wringer if I dared to bother him. Then, I was like," You gasp, "I can always count on his really cute but shy partner." You give Nick a sly look and he looks away bashfully. To keep himself occupied, he begins driving away. "But I realized that he never gave me his number so I just decided to walk instead."

Nick never knows how to respond to your teasing or flirting. The suave style his inner self tries to hype him with never sees the light of day. Instead, it's replaced with stuttering. "I drove by the store." Again his voice cracks, so he says it again. "To look for you. I mean to get a red-Redbull."

The expression on your face lets him know that you definitely heard what he said. "You do that often, you know?" He looks at you expectantly while making a right turn. "I thought in the beginning when I would flirt with you, that it was one-sided. You always look so damn uncomfortable. But then, Daryl tells me sometimes when you don't have the night shift, that you still pull up to the Fernando's at midnight. I thought to myself, why would Nick do that if he obviously doesn't like me?" You snap your fingers. "But then I started noticing the little glances you threw at me, the little compliments, and the adorable flush of dark blue on your skin. I knew right then and there that the feelings are definitely mutual.

"And yet, you never make a move." You sigh and mumble an "I don't get it."

This is the most conversation Nick has ever had with you and of course, he's fucking nervous. Inner Nick never prepared him for such a conversation. At this point, he just wants to jump out of the car and jog to the police station. He'll make an elaborate story about how he got hijacked by a gang. Yeah, he'll get more ridicule for it, but he doesn't care. As if sensing his dilemma, you reach over, grab his arm and tell him to drive a different way to your house. He doesn't question it but he's confused by the time he drives into deserted dirt-covered land. He turns to ask you about it, but the smolder you give shuts him up. Your hand returns to his bicep and it flexes underneath your fingers. After feeling his muscles for a bit, your hand travels to hold his chin. He watches you carefully, lips parted and eyes wide.

"Tell me what you want."

Nick stutters for a moment, unable to comprehend the situation. Is this a dream? It has to be. In this reality or any other alternate realities, you would not be sending out such delicious pheromones directed at him. Pants tightening and hands sweaty, Nick whispers his desires. He needs you now before he explodes.

You smile sweetly before leaning over and pressing a searing kiss on his lips. As soon as it connects, Nick is moaning as if you'd already sucked him off. A little pride swells in your chest. While your working on his lips, your other hand moves down to rub his bulge, eliciting even more moans. It's making you extremely hot. So, you move away from him and take your shirt off, leaving your bra-less chest hanging out. Eyes wide, Nick looks around frantically.

"We can't—" You cut him off with another kiss to his lips.

"Do you trust me?" He nods eagerly. "Then trust me when I say no one comes here. Now let's take this to the back, shall we?"

After quickly going from the front seat to the back while trying to stay as dry as possible, you pounce on Nick, hands roaming his broad chest while he tentatively moves his hands to cup your ass. A low moan comes from you and in turn, Nick grabs them harder. His lips begin to trail down your neck as you're grinding on his restricted cock.

You're chanting for Nick to fuck you already. Words like 'please', 'fuck me', and 'oh god' fill the air alongside low growls from Nick. Eventually, he's had enough with heavy petting and decides to let himself go. You barely get a chance to see his cock before he's ripping a hole in your leggings, moving your panties, and inserting himself within you. A loud gasp emits from your lips as you try to grind yourself down some more. But you can't.

No, Nick is in charge.

His powerful thighs give him the leverage to pound into you at unknown speeds. You once even said faster, and your boy complied swiftly. His hands grab your hips hard, using you as a rag-doll as his rhythm picks up and you're getting fucked to the point your seeing stars. There's drool seeping out of your opened mouth and Nick takes it as a chance to lick it up before digging his dull tusks into your neck. As soon as he does, the Big Bang happens behind your vision, the built orgasm just exploding.

Despite this, Nick continues. Your pussy is oversensitive but you don't tell him to stop because he hasn't gotten his fill yet. But you know you're going to orgasm again before he does. Not even a minute later, you do. At this point your begging Nick to finish. You begin to kiss his neck, searching for his sensitive spot. When you do, you suck on it as if your life depends on it. That does it for him.

A deep, loud orc growl emits from him as he says "Fuck!" Within seconds later, he's spilling his cum into you. It takes a moment for him to fully finish, but even after he's done, he still holds you.

"Oh, Nick." You breathily moan as you peel yourself off of him. Looking down, you find his uniform pants completely ruined—your juices mixed with his cum smearing his entire right pant leg. "We made such a mess."

Nick shyly smiles, his chest still moving at a rapid pace. "Sorry,"

Shaking your head, you lean forward into him and press a kiss on his sweaty collarbone. "You know how you can make it up to me?" He hums and closes his eyes, savoring your gentle touches. "By taking me to dinner and maybe, just maybe, making me your girlfriend."

His eyes snap open to watch your expression for a moment. A soft smile adorns your swollen lips, eyes on the verge of closing, and face devoid of any worries. His heart feels full of adoration, knowing that he wants to have you in his arms for as long as he can.

Without replying, Nick presses a kiss on your forehead, hoping that action alone can convey everything he wants to say.

────── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──────

word count: 1,823 published: april 7, 2020 edited: n/a

[stripper-patrick]

Reverse Psychology 📋 Nico Hiraga

For: @rarestruby

Warnings: pornhub could never, GET YOUR HOLY WATER, filth, unprotected, I don’t suggest trying this (unless you have an liked it)

Relationship: Nico Hiraga x requested reader 

“So Ms. Y/N tell me about you”

“Nico this isn’t about me” I say crossing my legs. I watch as he looks down at them licking his lips

“It’ll help me get to build a better relationship with you and a better relationship with you. Think of it as reverse psychology” he talks smoothly. Granite he was hot as hell but if we were to do anything I could lose my job for fraternizing with a patient.

“Fine I studied psychology for 6 years-“

“Sweetheart no disrespect but I wanna know about you not what you studied or why you got into the field of psychology” I scoff shaking my head “your hobbies, passions, interests”

“I’m stay at home mom to my cat and I watch reruns of American horror story. I don’t do much with my free time” now it’s my turn to flirt as I uncross my legs spreading them wide to get a glimpse of my lace panties. I cross the on the other side with a smirk played on my face.

Nico stands up and pulls the chair closer toward me so my leg is touching his thigh. I can see the visible bulge grown in his pants.

“Ok what do you do as far as fucking goes”

“This pussy hasn’t been touched by a man in a long time” I bite my lip allowing him to part my legs

“Well do I have the honor of touching this gorgeous pussy” he moans

“Lock the door first” he stands up and locks it. I pull my panties down and throw them on the floor. Nico comes over top of me wrapping his hand around my throat and squeezing gently. He gives me a rough open mouth kiss while his other hand massages my clit before going inside of me waving his fingers to stroke my g-spot.

I buck my hips onto his fingers riding them. My hand wraps around his bulging forearm and he releases the kiss. I moan softly riding harder. Nico pops open my blouse watching my breasts bounce. He curls his fingers up and I gasp.

He pulls out his fingers out and sucks on them right in front of me. I close my eyes smiling. Nico stands me up and turns me around pulling up my skirt past my hips. Terrapin a condom behind me then view him slowly expand my walls. I brace the chair moaning at the new contact I have an experienced in a long time.

Nico is balls deep into me already thrusting. His body clad on mine. He growls in my ear grabbing my breast and pulling at my bra. I bounce it back moaning and pushing my head back on his shoulder. His hand moves to my neck as he squeezes harder around my throat.

“You’re so fucking tight. Your little pussy is just swallowing me up” he moans in my ear “look at you. The little slut shrink like the fuck her patients”

If he kept talking to me like that I’d go off the deep end. His hand gets tighter around my neck and I smile gaining black spots in my vision. He licks my neck then sucks on it. Nico’s other hand moves down to my clit using 4 fingers to rub it like a DJ disk. My legs start shaking at the disruption of my bundle of nerves.

“N-nico” I moan out. He cuts off any oxygen before I can warn him of my head hitting orgasm. My body spasms as he laughs maniacally in my ear “creaming on my dick like the dirty whore you are. I can feel your pussy throbbing” he lets go which makes me gasp for air and the adrenaline mixed with my orgasm surges through my body. I can’t think I can’t moan or make a sound. My body thrashes and shakes while he cums with a series of grunts and curses. Nico pushes my head down still pounding me out.

I whimper, my throat sore from his hands and my entire body in flames. His thrusts get sloppier and sloppier until he comes to a halt. Nico pulls out and I wince at the slight pain of him coming out of me. He disposes then condom in my trash bin and I turn around looking at him. He grabs a water bottle holding it to my lips “drink”

I take a few sips feeling the liquid cook my throat. It glides down smooth. I look down at my meddled shirt “you ripped half of my buttons”

“Well maybe you need to take the day off and come home with me so I can rip the rest of them”

“I have more clients”

“Well how about you finish them and I take you out to dinner tonight” he asks

“It’s a date?”

“It’s a date” he winks getting dressed. I fix myself back to normal “well that’s it for today. Same time tomorrow?”

“Yes ma’am” he walks suavely out the door with a wink to conclude his last image of me. I smile to myself taking a deep breath waiting for the next patient.

[turquoise-stones]

Moderato

Bakugou x fem!reader

Loosely inspired by Moderato by Wheein and Hash Swan. Enjoy :)

. . .

You let out a tired puff of air, tucking loosing strands of air behind your ears as you sorted all your unneeded textbooks into your locker.

Music blasted in your ears, and you nodded your head to the addicting beat. Just as you closed the door, a figure, who's greetings had gone unheard, bumped into your side.

You turned to face the adorably grumpy expression of your childhood best friend. You noticed with a cheeky grin how he frowned at your earbuds.

"Hey Katsuki." You smiled, plucking out a side to hear him better.

"What's taking you so long?"

You gestured at your locker, before raising an eyebrow at him. "Why do you never just wait at the entrance like we agreed?"

"Cause you are too damn slow." He growled, starting to walk away. You rolled your eyes, speedwalking to catch up.

"Maybe you just can't wait to see me~" You teased, laughing at the way his scowl deepened.

"In your dreams." He huffed.

"Yeah, yeah." You giggled, rolling the earbud in your fingers for a moment before reaching up and sticking it into his ear. Even if he would never admit it, you knew he enjoyed your music.

His scowl lessened until his lips were merely a thin line. He let out a quiet sigh, shoving one hand deep into his pants pocket. With his other arm, he reached around your shoulders and tugged you towards him so that the two of you could walk closer side by side.

"The wires are gonna get tangled." You worried, pulling at the headphones that were already snagging on his buttons.

"Whatever." He grumbled, squeezing your shoulder. You couldn't help but smile at him.

. . .

The two of you were deep into homework, or at least Katsuki was. The thoughts occupying your mind demanded your attention and everytime you glanced at Katsuki they only came back stronger.

"Katsuki, should I find a boyfriend?"

"Hm?" He glanced up at you, an eyebrow raised in skepticism. "Why? Do you want one?"

"No, I just... urg nevermind."

You looked down in an attempt to concentrate on the work in front of you, but when you looked back up moments later he was still frowning at you.

You turned a bit pink, suddenly embarrassed for even asking. Scrunching up your nose and hiding your eyes with your hands, you grumbled at him to stop staring.

"Why're you asking me anyways?" He pressed.

"Okay okay fine I'll explain, it's just kinda embarrassing..." you said, uncovering your face and feeling the burn on your cheeks.

"I wanna try dating sometime in highschool and I guess... well I guess I wanted your opinion."

He grunted but said nothing. Upon hearing his silence you continued on.

"And like, no one's ever asked me out..." you said shyly, looking down to avoid eye contact.

"And some people like Yaomomo seem to get asked out every other day..." you bit your lip, trying to push down jealous feelings. "But that doesn't happen to me..."

"So maybe," you could already feel yourself starting to ramble, "maybe I should be the one asking people out instead if I want to date?"

Katsuki raised his eyebrows at you, a tiny smirk on his face. He knew for a fact that it wasn't your fault that no one ever flirted with you. It was quite cute how dense you were sometimes. Could he help wanting to scare off any boys that tried to approach you? You already had him after all, who would you need anyone else?

"I don't think you need to date." He said, adjusting some papers on his desk. "Any random dude you pick is nothing more than some stupid extra anyways."

"What- I thought you would support me here!" You pouted, grumpy that you aired out all your woes only for him to shut you down.

"But what if I wa-"

You suddenly stopped talking, and Katsuki looked up to see you wide eyed, mouth open in comical realization. All you needed was a lightbulb above your head.

"Oh my god... it's because of you!"

Hm. Maybe you weren't as dense as he thought.

"I'm always with you and you probably scare everyone off! And everyone probably thinks we're dating!"

You couldn't believe that in the many years that you've known him, how the thought only occurred to you now. You caught the growing smirk on his face, which only riled you up more.

"Katsuki!! Stop smirking darn it! This is a serious issue!" You whined, throwing an eraser in his general direction, which he swatted out of the air. His smirk had turned into a full on evil grin. "How will I ever find a boyfriend with you around?"

"Hmph. As if it's me. I think it's just that no one is interested in you."

"Oh m- do you want to die?!" You yelled, cheeks flushed, before launching yourself at him.

. . .

Some time later, you found yourself in his room, thinking back on the conversation.

"Hey Katsuki, do you want a girlfriend?" You asked curiously.

"Why're we still talking 'bout this?"

"Cause I wanna know!" You laughed.

"No."

"Huh?"

"No I don't want one."

"Oh." You tilted a head to the side in confusion. "That was fast. Why don't you? You're pretty popular so it's not like you'll get rejected."

He ignored your question and continued scrolling on his phone. You got off from his desk chair and sat down next to him, peeking at the random heros and faces in his feed.

"So... you're gonna tell me?"

"Shut up."

"Tell me whyyyyy." You pouted, shaking his shoulder. He didn't even look up.

"You're being annoying." He grumbled. You started to shake his wrist too, and at that point he couldn't read his phone anymore. Well it wasn't like he was paying attention to it to begin with.

"C'mon I told you all my reasons... so you too. Please?" You begged, engaging you best puppy dog eyes. It always worked. You knew it, and when Katsuki saw your adorable face, he knew it too.

"Fine. Get off me." He grumbled, pushing you away. He cursed at how cute you look when you sat back with a bounce and looked at him expectantly. "It's cause I already have one little brat following me around all the time. I don't need another one."

It took you a moment to catch on, and you didn't know whether to be touched or offended. But you assumed that it was just Katsuki being Katsuki and that his intent wasn't to hurt you.

"I... do you mean that... do you think of me as..." you were starting to turn red, and a blush was creeping onto Katsuki's face as well. He didn't mean it that way, but then again that was how he felt so maybe he did mean it that way.

"Shut up. Whatever." He stuttered out, and you felt him starting to close up.

"Wait wait no Katsuki let's talk about this!"

"What's there to talk about?" He grumbled, ears turning pink.

"I... I don't know. You like me, d-don't you?" You questioned softly.

He froze, suddenly unsure what to say. Sure, he had thought of this moment before, thought of every smooth and flirty reply, but every suave answer he could have said completely evaded him.

"Cause friends aren't as... touchy as we are... and friends don't avoid dating for each other... right?" His uncharacteristic quietness made you nervous but you kept talking.

"And this whole time I've been wanting a boyfriend but you're always here so we're pretty much... um..." you couldn't bring yourself to say the words.

He pressed his lips together seriously. "What do you want me to do, confess to you?"

You flushed with embarrassment and stuttered something unintelligible.

"No! Well- yes? I don't know Katsuki this is weird okay!?" You covered your eyes, feeling your skin burn under your palms.

"I like you, Katsuki. I think you like me too... in that way... but I don't want things to get awkward..." you sighed. "Do you think we should just stay friends?"

You the bed dip underneath you as he shifted closer. The pads of his thumbs brushed against your knuckles before settling on your forearms.

"Well if we like each other what's the point in staying friends." He grumbled. You let out a sigh.

"If I kiss you, right now, you have to promise nothing will change. Okay?" He said lowly, gentler than normal now that you were so close. A kiss?? You had asked the question innocently and somehow, so quickly, things had taken a romantic turn. He tugged at your arm to pull your hands away from your face.

"I p-promise." You tried not to stutter but he was just so close.

And with that, he closed his eyes, leaning in and pressing a warm peck onto your lips.

After a second, the two of you parted. You stared at him in awe. You never really noticed how handsome he was before. When you see someone everyday you become so used to them...

"S-stop staring you brat." He muttered angrily, pulling you tighter into his chest so that you wouldn't have to see how soft you made him.

"It's a little strange..." you admitted, voice muffled by his shirt. "But I'm happy that you're my first..."

"I'd better be your last too."

You peeked up at him.

"What?"

His nose scrunched up as his heart welled with affection. It felt so right to hold you here in his arms, as a lover, not merely as a friend. He leaned in and captured your lips into another kiss.

[lukatheselkie]

HMC - “I’m so sick of lying. I have to tell you…”

@hetaliamondaychallenge

Sorry it’s a bit late! I got busy creating for a cosplay I’m super excited about, then I got stuck talking to my parents. BUT I’m finally finished with today’s challenge! I wrote this all today because I had no idea what pairing I would do, then my pairing actually changed about 200 words in, and, well... It became angsty at that point. Then it got out of hand and became about 800-1000 words longer than I had planned. Oops?

Pairing: DenFra

Warnings: Bar, alcohol, one “bad” word (it’s dick)

Human AU

    "Mathias!" Gilbert runs up to him excitedly. He tries to stop, but can't because of the speed he built up, and throws his arm out. He manages to drag the Dane down to the ground with him as he falls, both laughing. They get a few looks from the bar patrons, but overall their tumble goes ignored. Gilbert sits up, smoothing his hair down quickly. "Mathias! Zere's a really pretty woman over zere! I'm going to flirt vith her, und jou can't beat me to her!" He hops up and makes his way toward the woman, walking suavely. The Dane's smile drops, and he sighs heavily as he watches his friend make his move. He looks away and pushes himself up off the floor when she appears to flirt back.

    He trudges over to the stools by the bar, and plops down in one. He stares ahead miserably, heart aching. "Alright. Who broke your heart?" He jumps at the voice, then frowns down at the counter. "If I had any doubts before, they're gone now. Want to talk about it?" He jerks his head up to glare at the man, but finds himself holding back his shock. The man is absolutely stunning. "You'll catch flies, mon cher." There's a soft tap to his chin, and he closes his mouth, completely embarrassed. He turns his head away, cheeks flushed. The stranger chuckles. "I don't normally do this, but you're too adorable. Have a drink on me." Mathias swivels his head around.

    "You don't have to-"

    "Nonsense. I want to. Besides, it might help get your mind off the person that broke your heart. Oh, I do hate seeing that pitiful expression on anyone's face. Especially someone so cute." He winks at him, before turning to get him a drink. When he puts down a beer, Mathias stares at him in awe. "What's your name?" He tilts his head slightly at the question. Name? Oh! Right! His name!

    "My name is Mathias!" He says too quickly. "What's yours?" The man smirks playfully.

    "Francis. Now, I have other orders to tend to, but perhaps we can converse at a later date? Over some coffee?" He nods eagerly, watching the beautiful man scribble something onto a napkin before hurrying to the other side of the bar. It isn't until ten minutes later that he realizes he just agreed to a date. He glances around the room quickly, searching for Gilbert. Luckily (or unluckily) for him, Gilbert is parting the crowd, making a straight line toward him, beautiful woman in tow. His stomach drops to the ground again, and he remembers why Francis spoke to him in the first place. His stupid crush on his best friend.

    "Ve're going out~! Don't vait up. Und don't vait here, eizer. Go home vhen jou're done. I'll pay for jour drinks! Zanks for letting me bring jou out tonight." And with that, they're gone. He's gone. Mathias downs his fresh beer and lays his head on the counter miserably. He closes his eyes, just for a moment, allowing himself to wallow in his sorrow.

~

    "Hey. Wake up. Please." Mathias drifts into a drowsy state of awakeness, but keeps his eyes closed. Someone's running their fingers through his hair; he imagines it's Gilbert, though he knows it's not. "Mathias. Please. It's closing time." He opens his eyes with a groan. He lifts his head up, closing his eyes again at the bright lights. "You poor thing. How much did you drink? I'm sure you have a hell of a hangover. Alright. You can stay here while I clean up, then I'm taking you home with me. Lay your head back down." He does as he's told without arguing. Some time passes, though he's not sure how much. He feels a hand on his shoulder, and he looks up again. Thankfully, the lights are out now. "Come on. I can't leave you here, and I would like to go home." He stands slowly, and wobbles a bit. A hand presses into the small of his back, enabling him to steady himself a bit. He shuffles forward, letting the person guide him. He's almost certain it's Francis, so he's not worried about being kidnapped.

    "You're familiar," he mumbles out, leaning into him. He wants to place where he's seen him before. Stunning white hair and beautiful pale skin comes to mind. "Gil," he whines loudly. "You know Gilbert." They stop, but only for a second.

    "Oui, I do. He was here tonight. He told me he was with a close friend. I didn't know that was you." Mathias scoffs harshly.

    "I wish it weren't!" Okay, maybe he's still a bit drunk. He's not usually truthful about... this.

    "Why is that?" A heavy silence falls over them. He doesn't want to answer. It feels too selfish. They make it outside, and Francis leads him to his vehicle. He opens the passenger side door, helps him in and buckles him, all in the awkward silence. Mathias turns his head to watch him get in the driver's side, and decides he should say something.

    "He's the one that broke my heart," he whispers out. Francis freezes for a long moment, then looks at him, an unspoken question in his eyes. How? "I've got this stupid crush on him. It's not even because I have feelings for him. That would be better than this. At least then I would be able to tell him. But telling him 'Hey, I like how you look, you're absolutely beautiful, and I have feelings for that appearance. Not your personality because I only see that as my friend, but I'm absolutely in love with your body.' would be beyond insane!" He trembles, and forces himself to take a deep breath. "He likes women anyway. And even if he likes men too, I don't want a relationship with him. We're perfect as friends. I don't think anything more would be good for us. We're at our best as friends." He closes his eyes yet again. "Just... Take me home with you. Please. I don't want to think about this anymore. I want to sleep off this hangover."

    "I can let you do that. But you really should tell Gilbert about your attraction to his appearance. Maybe not everything you told me, but something." Mathias glares daggers at him. "It's just a well-meant suggestion." He starts the vehicle, and pulls out of the space. The Dane turns on some music for background noise as they ride. He's leaning against the window, half asleep, when the vehicle stops. He stumbles out of the seat quickly, and is met by Francis grabbing him by the waist. "You are hurting. Let me help." He doesn't protests as he leads him inside. He only takes note of how soft the couch is before his eyes are closed for the final time that night.

~

    Mathias sits up in a rush. He looks around the room frantically, heart beating fast. He had dreamed about... He flushes crimson at the fleeting images quickly leaving his mind's eye. Of course his subconscious has to tell him everything. He pushes the blanket off of him, furrowing his brows. Francis must have put it over him after he fell asleep. Where is Francis, anyway? It smells good in here, so he assumes he's making breakfast. He follows his nose to the food, and smiles when he sees the man in the kitchen. He's only wearing short shorts, and an apron. He's not sure if it's sleep or his dream, but he feels the need to say something. So, he does. "I didn't know I would get a treat before breakfast." He whirls around quickly. Mathias can't help but feel pride in his slightly pink cheeks.

    "I didn't hear you come in! You scared me." He gives a soft, shy smile. "You really think seeing me like this is a treat?" He nods eagerly.

    "Oh ja. You are very alluring. Both your personality and your body." Francis raises a brow, and steps toward Mathias. He doesn't stop until he's right in front of him. Before he can say anything, the Dane blurts out, "Please kiss me."

    "Gladly." He presses their lips together gently. It's a positively marvelous kiss.

~

    "Mathias? Jou're here!" Gilbert grins at him. "Jou're really here! Vhere have jou been? Ve haven't spoken in five months. Did I do somezing vrong?" He shakes his head slowly.

    "Nej, nothing like that. I had to think." The albino's brows furrow.

    "Are jou okay?"

    "That's not important. Francis and I are together. We have been since we last saw each other. He wanted me to tell you when I was ready. Don't get upset at him for not telling you. I asked him not to. He agreed it was best for me to wait to be ready."

    "Vhat's vrong? Jou sound drained." Mathias sighs heavily.

    "I am. I’m so sick of lying. I have to tell you... I stopped hanging out with you for my own good. I'm mostly over it now, but I used to be attracted to you. I didn't want to date, but I couldn't deny your beauty. Again, I'm mostly over it now, but it was only fair you know why I've been gone." A thick silence falls over them. It stretches out for a minute, then two. By the fifth minute, Mathias turns to leave, having told him what he needed to.

    "Vait! I'm glad jou told me. I zought I had done somezing horrible. Jou know jou could have told me, right? I vould have done everyzing I could to make myself less attractive!" He laughs, and wraps his arms around Mathias tightly. "I'm glad I didn't lose jou as a friend. Und I'm glad jou met someone to be vith! Vhen's ze vedding?" He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. Mathias turns crimson, and pulls away from him.

    "Not for a long time!" Gilbert smiles fondly.

    "I know. But seriously, I hope jou have found ze ein. I'm rooting for jou two! Now go be vith him." He shoves him toward the waiting vehicle gently. Mathias is almost certain he recognized it, and that's why he's letting him go so soon after their re-connection. He hurries to the vehicle, and hops in. He sighs in relief the moment he's buckled, and Francis chuckles.

    "How did it go, amour?" He starts driving.

    "Much better than I thought." He feels his phone vibrate. It's a message from Gilbert. Get some dick! It reads. He groans, and puts his phone away without replying.

    "Things are exactly how they used to be between you two, aren't they?" He nods with a joking huff. "Good. I knew they would be. Now, how does a picnic date sound?"

    "You spoil me. That sounds perfect, and so wonderfully you." He glances at his boyfriend, watching the smile play at his lips and flush travel up to his ears. He's completely in love with Francis, and he's positive his feelings are reciprocated.

[polymathart]

“Cass has no canonical interest in men.”

Does she? This post is not to bash anyone who disagrees. Nor is it to promote any sort of homophobia. I believe all healthy ships are valid and disapprove of ship hate and shipping wars. This is merely to posit a different opinion. If you do not wish to read, you are welcome to ignore this post.

People say Cass has “no canonical interest in men,” but if you think about it, the few men that she actually knows mostly are on tease / play fight level with her. Eugene and Lance aren’t “sweet and fluffy” to Cass. They’re snarky and goofy around her which annoys her. She’s never known anyone other than Rapunzel who is so wholesome and warm towards her.

Most of the men we have seen Cassandra interact with on screen (save for elders and authorities such as King Frederic, her father Cap, and Uncle Monty) have been either obnoxious and loud in her eyes (Eugene and Lance and Hookfoot), or have been hostile and demeaning to her (various ruffians and Hector).

To Cassandra, most of the men she has ever truly interacted with have been annoying or immature. (This may or may not also be off the fact that she had grown up with her father’s prejudice towards criminals.)

This is not to paint Cassandra as prejudiced against all men. She has grown to tolerate Lance, Eugene, and Hookfoot. That is clear. But she is just easily irritated by immature, juvenile people. Going off of what little the Series has provided us about Cassandra’s past, we can assume that she never had many friends to grow up with—male or female. She is still on the road to learning about opening up to people. Everyone she knew in Corona were just the beginning of that journey.

Cassandra has a liking towards the sweeter, softer, more wholesome and gentle ones. Rapunzel fits that category quite easily. However, there is another individual Cass knows who also fits that category—one who has been compared to and shares many characteristics with Rapunzel: Varian.

Since the start, Varian has been portrayed and almost universally received as an endearing, friendly, and soft individual. Four moments when his openness and concern for others shine most are in “Great Expotations” when he listens to and understands Cassandra’s desire to please her father, in “Rapunzel’s Return” when he admits his error and desire to make amends with Rapunzel, and in “Be Very Afraid” when he opens up to Rapunzel about his remorse and fears of his past, as well as listening to and comforting Rapunzel when she talks about her own fears of losing Cassandra. The final, most poignant instance of Varian’s kindness is in “Cassandra’s Revenge” when he begs Cassandra to reconsider her choices. It is one of his best moments: when he throws down his own shame and turmoil in an effort to show his friend that she is not alone and that she was in danger of losing herself as well as the everything she loved.

Cassarian shippers do not ship them out of contempt or denial of the possibility of Cassandra’s interest in Rapunzel or other women. We ship her with Varian when he is older because he is remarkably kind and gentle and overall sweet to everyone. He has that kind and loving smile just like Rapunzel has. Yes he is dorky and clumsy and impulsive sometimes, but he does not carry that suaveness or flirting personality as Eugene, Lance, or Andrew have. He tries to charm her once before but he never tries to puff himself up or “flex” himself to her.

Cassarian shippers see Varian as being the adorable, playful, unassuming, and helpful yet bold, righteous, mature, courageous, and curious young man he will be by the time Cassandra does return to Corona. Cassandra’s sharp, sassy nature will not be competitively butting heads with another sharp, sassy nature. Rather, she will meet a nature that is forgiving and patient while still not being malleable or breakable.

Cassandra is like Eugene—quick on the draw, cunning, and competitive but not abusive. Varian is like Rapunzel—patient, understanding, and eager to help others but never easy to take advantage of.

Once again, this is not to shame or start a fight with anyone. This is merely to put forth my very own opinion. I am open to criticism and debate whether publicly, privately, or anonymously.

Dominus vobiscum,

Polymath.

ADDENDUM

I think overall Cass just is attracted to softer and more sincere people.

Though she and Eugene bite at each other, she does show a certain bit of care to him when he is being truly humble. Like when she saw that he was genuinely hurt that Cap kept dismissing Eugene’s skills to be a guard. She actually reached out to him. When Eugene set off to look for Frederick and Arianna, she didn’t roll her eyes or anything. She admitted that even she was hoping he would pull through.

And never once when Rapunzel is having doubts about Eugene does she take it as an opportunity to chat it up with Rapunzel. I think Cass genuinely loves Eugene and Rapunzel being together not just Rapunzel being happy. That’d just be selfish. She cares that yes Rapunzel is happy but also Rapunzel is happy with the right person.

Cassandra showed interest when she realized how “graceful” Lance could dance. And I speculate that if she saw Lance taking care of Angry and Catalina, she would’ve smiled, too.

Cass didn’t like Andrew for his smooth talk but for his faux sentimentality and penchant for books. And she kept the rose because she actually kinda liked going on a date and treating her nicely, even if it was just a ploy.

And she shows no interest in Varian at all during the series. However, she did feel for him when Quirin first appeared. She smiled when Varian actually understood her issues with her father. And when Varian first called her a friend. And finally when she realized just how sincere and honest he was about the expo and impressing her rather than throwing a fit, she saw that Varian wasn’t some annoying teenager trying to charm her. He actually had substance and depth.

Rapunzel overall is the sweetest person Cass has ever known. Her happiness and compassion is what Cass grew to love. She isn’t used to seeing such character in people, especially in most guys. There’s a light that goes off in Cass’ heart when she’s with Rapunzel, yes. But when she finds other people with real feelings and wholesomeness, too, that same light turns on.