#��😬😬 gonna regret this but

[adhbombus]

Spending money is my favorite activity

[running-in-the-dark]

I'm very tired, and also we got pizza yesterday which was a giant mistake. I ate half of it yesterday and half today. so so much pain. why did I choose to have garlic oil on it?! it probably would've been bad already without that. but no, I just had to make it even worse.

[hermeticbridgetroll]

My mom is drunk & she's acting really fricken weird. It's scaring me.

[jaskersneakthief]

The bond between a mentally ill closeted transmasc and his triangle is indescribable

[espinosaurusrexex]

Bad Boys Don't Buy Flowers

CEO!BuckyBarnes x Female!Florist!Reader AU

read Steve's story here

summary: Bucky would have never thought, he’d be chasing after a girl. Not when all of them usually fell at his feet. But when he finds himself entangled in a deal born out of a desperate argument with his assistant, he realizes there is nothing he wouldn't do for you: The independent florist who is adamantly dragging him to the homeless shelter every chance she gets. There is just one problem: Bucky doesn't know how to tell you. And the teasing from his friends is certainly not making things easier for him...

a/n: I should be working instead of writing long ass billionaire love stores, but here we are: you and me both... happy it happened and already regretting the tasks we neglected because of it (please enjoy this wholesome piece of imagination - I know it's long, but I hope you’ll give it a try nonetheless)

word count: 16.4k 😬

warnings: play boy behavior/talk, a reader that knows what she wants, Bucky falls first (and hard 🤭), mentions of war, injuries, and death (all not applying to Bucky for once), just so much fluff, questioning life choices (angst with happy ending!), smut (this is freaking love making okay?!?!? praise and confessions, dry humping, fingering, multiple orgasms, squirting, touch starved Bucky - in a way…, sensual and beautiful, protected p in v, cock warming, and aftercare) !MINORS DNI!

ﾟ✫ 𝒎𝒂𝒊𝒏 𝒎𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 ｡✭･ﾟ✶ 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅 𝒐𝒏 𝐀𝐎𝟑 ✧*･ﾟ𝒄.𝒂𝒊 ｡✭･ﾟ

"Did you place the order?" Bucky leaned back in Steve's office chair and watched as his friend paced the space with a hand in his pocket. 

Steve was grinning like an idiot when the answer on the other side satisfied him and Bucky felt a tiny little spark in his chest at the sight. He'd watched his best friend go through life with a default tension in his shoulders for what seemed like forever. All until he found Bambi - a sweet and incredibly clumsy woman who was formerly his maid. But they found each other and Steve had been a happier man ever since.

Bucky was happy for him, too. He was a lot more fun to be around ever since, but it did remind him that Bucky himself had yet to find the one that would make his heart beat faster. 

It was a ridiculous idea, of course. Bucky was never the one for relationships or long-term commitment in the romantic department. To be honest, he wasn't even sure he was capable of love - not that he needed it, anyway. He had no problem with having a new plaything every other night. It was fun and kept him on his toes. 

"Perfect. Okay. Thanks, Sharon." Bucky sat up straighter in the chair. "Yeah, next Friday. See you later."

Steve sighed as he slumped on the sofa across the room. He watched the ceiling, looking like a love-drunk schoolboy, even though he tried so hard to conceal it. Bucky knew him too well.

"Dinner is booked.”

“You’re really doing it huh?"

“Yup." There was no doubt in Steve’s answer, but rather a special kind of excitement Bucky rarely felt.

The brunette just nodded as he looked to the ground, the chair swaying as he pushed his knees from one side to the other. 

Steve just grinned in response. "So when are you gonna let me help you find the one?"

Bucky perked up, amusement seeping through his gaze when he answered his best friend. ”Me? No no. I’m fine."

Steve shrugged. ”You know, that’s exactly what I said about a year ago."

"No offense, Stevie, but you and I were in vastly different sex universes back then. I’m getting laid - I’m aaaaall good." He leaned back with a smug grin and Steve just frowned in response. "You can be as happy as you want but don’t start trying to get everyone on the girlfriend train. That’s a Rogers and Wilson thing. I don’t need that type of commitment."

Steve remained silent as he watched Bucky stand up and head for the door, a thoughtful look on his face when his friend passed him. 

“Look, I’m happy for you, truly. I just don’t see myself in that type of life.” Bucky’s hand squeezed Steve’s shoulder just as the blonde cocked his head to the side. 

“Never?”

Bucky winked at him. “You know I like to live in the present. But speaking of the future... You’re still up for tomorrow night, right?”

“Tomorrow night?"

"Ironbar."

Steve’s eyes widened. ”Shit. No, I promised Bambi we'd-" Steve stopped when he saw Bucky's eyebrows raise in amusement. “...next time."

Bucky sighed in defeat. "Tell her to leave some Steve time for the rest of us, will ya?" And with a laugh of Steve’s, he shut the office door, walked past Sharon’s desk, then Natasha’s, and then into his own office.

❁ ❁ ❁

The clock hand barely struck 8am when another set of files hit Bucky’s desk. 

Bucky huffed as he watched Natasha stand before him with an amused smile, her hands on her hips that were hugged by a tight pencil skirt. “Looking for something, Boss?”

“No...”

“Something like... the invitation to that business dinner on Thursday?” She mused and carefully pulled a piece of paper from the stack between them. 

Bucky snatched it with a glare. “It would be much more helpful if you sorted this chaos rather than stand here and be a smartass.” He looked at the invite, the familiar company logo printed in the top right corner. “And why are people even sending paper invites anymore? We’re a security firm,” he sat the paper down and tapped on it with his index finger, “just shows how desperately they need consulting.” 

“Don’t blame me for it.” Nat threw her hands in the air. “And stop complaining. I know you’re the cyber guy but a couple papers shouldn’t faze you. I’ve got more important things to do that don’t particularly fall in your area of expertise.” She turned to leave but Bucky stopped her before her heels could reach the threshold. 

“Are you saying your job is harder than mine?” Bucky watched the mess on his desk, then the computer screen with his calendar and the impending meeting with those jackasses from Hydra Enterprises. There was no way sorting a couple of papers could be worse than Alexander Pierce and his nephew Brock Rumlow. One of them barely knew how to send an E-mail and the other kept subtly asking if it was legal to install cameras in the lady’s room. 

“If you’re referring to your inability to sort a couple files, then yes, I assume you wouldn’t last a day with my tasks.” 

“Now that’s bullshit.”

“Is it now?” She raised her left eyebrow with a half-smirk. “I want to see you deal with idiots when scheduling appointments and keeping everyone’s day structured while also organizing the annual fundraiser.”

Bucky huffed, leaning back and crossing his arms before his chest. He averted his eyes from his assistant and the stupid pile of paperwork in front of him. He really did not want to sort through all of that. 

“Call me old fashioned but I believe assistants should sort files.” He shrugged, knowing Natasha wouldn’t let him off that easily. They had been working together for years, he respected her as much as his other friends. And presenting the fierce redhead with a challenge to get out of some annoying tasks was something he would gladly do. 

“I’ll tell you what. I will sort your papers in my assistant duties.” She made a mockery curtsy - as much as her skirt allowed - and then lifted her finger before the smile could spread on Bucky’s face. “If... you plan the charity event.”

Bucky was shocked. He didn’t expect her to play dirty - well to be fair, it wouldn’t be Nat if she weren’t teasing a little bit - but still. “You think you can handle that, boss?” 

Bucky closed his mouth and eyed her suspiciously. It couldn’t be that hard to do. And certainly would be a nice distraction from the impending meeting of doom as well as the following consulting sessions. He let his head fall back and stared at the ceiling. 

Was he really going to trade some papers for a whole Gala? That paperwork really sucked. He loved how easily he could wash through files on his computer. Sadly, his programs didn’t help much in the analog part of the job. 

“Are you backing down, Barnes?” Nat’s teasing voice rang through to him and he snapped back into his attitude. 

“Never.” He stood up, fixed his suit, and then reached his hand toward her. Natasha shook it with an evil smirk. “Always a pleasure doing business with you, Ms. Romanoff.”

And with that, she took the papers from Bucky’s desk and carried them out of his office with a triumphant smile. 

❁ ❁ ❁

It wasn’t long before Bucky regretted his decision. 

What had he been thinking? A Fundraiser... a fucking fundraiser. Bucky couldn’t care less about them. 

Okay, that wasn’t true. He deemed charity to be a very important part of society... and economy. There were times in his life when he was close to needing their help as well. And Bucky swore he’d never let that aspect of his story slip from his mind ever. Still, it didn’t prevent him from living lavishly and making use of the things he had access to now. 

Usually, the organization of the charity gala was stuck on Nat and Sharon. Mainly because they had always done an amazing job. The tabloids had only positive things to write about it and always pushed the number before Christmas even higher. Which urged Bucky even more to do just as good of a job this year. 

There was just one problem. 

He had no idea how to organize events this size. Bucky could program a software from scratch, hack into classified state files on a bad day. Hell, he could track every person’s phone in New York in his sleep. But he never expected to be overwhelmed by a couple invites and color palettes. 

Though as little as he knew about his new task, he liked a challenge, and he would most certainly not give Natasha the satisfaction of asking her for a checklist. 

So, the internet had to do for now. He’d found a blog by a highly motivated suburban mom, that led with step-by-step instructions on how to plan the perfect event. It might not have been on the scale of what Bucky had to do, but considering his lack of knowledge on the topic, he figured this would do until Natasha snatched the task away from him again. 

The first thing on the list was to find a date and venue. But since the gala of Shield Protection Services was always held at the same venue, Bucky figured they had booked it indefinitely for the event. 

Next was to find the perfect florist that ‘is able to put your vision into extravagant floral arrangements’. Yeah... that was another problem. 

Bucky didn’t buy flowers. The only women he deemed important enough in his life to get them were his sister and his mother. And well, both of them had passed away. So, picking the right flowers hadn’t been a problem until now. His mother and sister were always enchanted by the bouquets they received when Bucky was younger. He’d steal them from their neighbor‘s garden. But since he could grow a beard, Bucky hadn’t even touched flowers anymore.

Well, that had to change now. 

Bucky stepped into the elevator just to be greeted by big round eyes and an even wider smile. “Paying Steve a visit?” Bucky teased with a half smile as he hugged Bambi and then faced the doors. 

“I’m actually meeting Natasha for lunch,” she shifted from one foot to the other, “I didn’t realize she was already at the restaurant... so that’s where I’m headed now.”

Bucky chuckled at her slight awkwardness. But it wouldn’t be Bambi if she wouldn’t miss such a detail. 

“Do you need a ride? My driver’s waiting for me anyway.”

“Tha- yes that would be nice, thank you.”

Bucky just nodded and gestured for her to lead the way when they reached the ground floor. 

“Where are you going?” Bambi asked as he stared out the window of the car. They had told the driver where they needed to go. And Since Bucky had no particular destination in mind, it worked out well. 

“I’m on the hunt for the perfect flower shop to cater to my vision of our charity event.” He chuckled and shook his head at his own words. He’s never thought he’d say this.  

Her eyes peered at him with intrigue, a glimmer washing over them when she asked: “Are you taking suggestions?”

Bucky sat up straighter now. “Uh, yes. Gladly.” This was easier than he thought. 

“There is this wonderful shop in Brooklyn. It’s called AsGarden on 18th Avenue. You can’t miss it, it’s like a breath of fresh air between all those ugly beige buildings. The woman owning it has great taste, she managed to make the perfect bouquet for me without ever seeing me.” She turned forward, a little flustered, “Steve gets me flowers from there sometimes, they’re my favorite.”

“Did you hear that, Stan?” A victorious smile spread on Bucky’s face as he squeezed Bambi’s shoulder. “Next stop is Brooklyn.”

“Alright, Sir.”

“You don’t know how much easier you just made my life.” Bucky leaned forward and kissed her cheek before the car came to a stop and he bid her goodbye. 

“I’m glad I could help.” She waved back and then headed into the restaurant. 

Maybe the event wasn’t so difficult after all, Bucky thought as he leaned back in his seat, his legs spreading in satisfaction.

❁ ❁ ❁

The cool air snook through your shop when the familiar bell of a customer chimed above the door. You’d seen many people frequent your shop daily. Women, men, teenagers, elderly. All came from different backgrounds and varying stories in their repertoire. Your store was in the heart of Brooklyn - a bunch of people mixed in this town. And you’d made it your mission to find the perfect flower arrangement for each and every one of them. 

The man who had set off your little bell this afternoon was different though. A perfectly tailored coat adorned his broad shoulders. The way his hands were tucked in his pockets revealed the expensive-looking suit beneath as well as the toned chest that hid beneath the button-up in vain. His presence oozed money as he sashayed through your shop, carefully grazing delicate pedals with the aura he brought in. 

He seemed to own the world, but something about him just didn’t fit between the colorful flowers surrounding him. If you didn’t know any better, he looked a little lost, eyes glassy as they swayed through the sea of colors and shapes soaking in fresh water. 

“Good afternoon, sir. Can I help you?”

He ripped around, fixed his posture, and approached the cash desk. When his eyes landed on you, he froze. Just for a second, however, and then his jaw snapped into a handsome smile as he leaned forward. 

“I sure hope so.” His white teeth flashed between his lips before his tongue stroked over them. It was capturing. “This flower shop has been recommended to me. You wouldn’t happen to be the owner?”

“Well actually, I am,” you smiled hiding the pride swelling in your chest from the comment.

“Great. What is your capacity when it comes to event arrangements?”

“That depends...” You smiled as the handsome stranger raised his eyebrows in intrigue. “I reckon we have vastly different understandings of what is small and... big.” Your eyes wandered over his expensive coat again. The innuendo was accidental, really, but he seemed to be amused nevertheless. 

“My company is hosting its annual charity event in November... at The Glasshouse.”

“So just as I suspected...” You nodded and strode past him towards the fall flowers.

“Pardon me?”

You turned your head towards him and winked. “Bigger than I thought.”

“So?” He approached you with his hands still in his coat pockets and peeked over your shoulder. “Can you do it?”

“Totally.” Then you gestured to the flowers. “Do you have any preferences? I don’t have all the flowers in yet, but I recommend going with some soft orange and sage tones... to cater to the season.”

“Forgive me, sweetheart, but I am useless when it comes to this kind of stuff. My qualities lie more in the technical aspect of things.” A hand ran through his thick dark hair and the gesture made him look boyish.

“Alright let me rephrase my question then: Do you trust me?” A sly smile sneaked on his face, matching yours. 

He tipped his head. “My life is in your hands.” 

“Good. Then please write down your details here.” You pushed a form over the counter once you reached it again, and the man just followed you around like a lost dog. You watched as his hand swiftly filled out the free spaces on the paper, curious which company he had been referring to. 

“Wait you’re working for SPS?” 

“I own it, sweetheart.” The man adjusted his coat as you tried to look unimpressed. “My name is James Barnes, but you can call me Bucky.” His hand extended over the shiny countertop until it encased your smaller fingers and his warmth seeped through your body. 

Bucky’s smile brightened when you revealed your name to him, telling you how beautiful it was, and you began to struggle not to show the effects it had on you. Then he resumed filling out the order and slid it over to you again. 

“What cause are you raising money for this year?” You asked as you sorted the paper into your books, only to be surprised when Bucky seemed a little nervous all of a sudden. 

You knew Shield Protection Services was a pristine company with reach to people whose powers you could barely comprehend. Whatever they were choosing, it would have a big impact on the change their chosen organization was advocating. 

“Well, to be honest... we haven’t decided yet.” A silly idea hushed through your head at that, but you dismissed it. A company such as Bucky’s would raise sums only big fish could handle. There wasn’t space for the things you had in mind. 

“I hope you’ll do so soon, then.” You nodded thoughtfully and ended with a tight-lipped smile. 

Bucky nodded and smiled, then turned around and headed for the door. But before he could open it, he came back again. You looked up to see a black card held before you. 

“I’d be happy for suggestions... if you have any in mind.” He shrugged with that cheeky look of his and then left. And you just stood there, dumbfounded, and toying with the ridiculous idea that Bucky Barnes might actually be able to read minds. 

❁ ❁ ❁

“Rogers really couldn’t make it?” Tony asked as he leaned back in the leather booth of his very own establishment. He tipped his emptied whiskey glass towards the slender redhead at the bar and smiled as she rushed to get his refill ready. 

“He promised Bambi to be home...” Bucky trailed off as he watched a customer hit on the waitress - Tiffany he remembered - A pretty thing, but unfortunately incredibly hollow when it came to conversation... not that Bucky looked for anything like it.  

Tony huffed. “That woman has him wrapped around her finger!” He liked Bambi, everyone did, he just missed hanging out with his guys. 

“Just wait until you find the one, Tony,” Sam chimed in with a sly smirk on his face - a hopeful, yet cautious hint as Sam secretly loved the idea of all his friends finally finding the one. He was a romantic, Bucky knew it, even if Sam never actually said it. 

“Me? I would never give up my glorious bachelor life for one woman. There are way too many things to explore...”

“Mark my words, Stark. We’ll look back to this day and laugh about this incredibly jackassy statement. You, too will be finding the one. I just know it.”

Bucky chuckled and tipped his glass on the Table as the bickering of his friends faded into background noise. For some reason, he didn’t feel like adding to the conversation. He blamed it on the banality of a conversation both he and Tony had long decided on, but perhaps, it was because for once in his life, he considered taking Sam’s side on the topic. 

It was ridiculous, really, how fast you’d occupied his mind when it came to Sam’s comment about finding ‘the one’. He didn’t even know you aside from the ‘background check’ he conducted after his visit to your shop. That might have covered your personal details, but he still didn’t know if you were a dog person or preferred cats, or if you were vegan or vegetarian, or if you considered kids in your future. 

Bucky cleared his throat and sat up straighter when he felt the fluster creep up his neck. What the hell was happening to him? He wasn’t like this at all. Women occupied his mind for about as long as it took for him to make them come undone in his hands. When he was with them, his full attention was on them - he loved them - but he’d never let them control his life. James “Bucky” Barnes never even considered seeing them twice, let alone thinking about a future with them. 

Though, to Bucky’s displeasure - or pleasure (he hadn’t decided yet) - the thought of seeing you again wasn’t uncomfortable to him. On the contrary, he got a weird tingly feeling in his stomach when he remembered the smell of the flowers in your shop and how your delicate fingers carefully picked out the prettiest ones. Bucky sat his drink down with a clink. Maybe he’d had enough alcohol for tonight.

“Barnes, how come you’re not defending me here? Have you grown soft or something? Do you have a girl we don’t know about?” Tony’s nagging broke through to Bucky and the whole bar reached back into his consciousness.

“Sorry, what?” He stuttered, shaking his thought and trying to find a good answer to his friend’s remark. “I was distracted by Betty.” Bucky smiled sheepishly as he received a clap on his shoulder. 

“That’s my man.” Tony grinned and Sam huffed into his whiskey. And Bucky? He just sunk into his seat, feeling somehow shameful for the white lie he had made up.

❁ ❁ ❁

The SPS office was impressive. Amongst the old New York brick building surrounding it, it reached up into the sky with its glass front everything. But you wouldn’t be fooled by its fragile looks. This was one of the most secure buildings in the city. You’d read about it in an article some time back - the whole hype about the company was their way of making fragile-looking things indestructible. You couldn’t see through the “windows” from the outside. And you wouldn’t be able to launch a rocket through it either. SPS had patented their stronger-than-steel-glass years ago, making them the leading security company in the world. 

To say you had been a little surprised to see the very owner of said company on your side of town would be an understatement. But besides his incredibly adamant way of flirting, he was quite normal to talk to. He’d even asked you for advice on the cause they should donate to this year. And after having thought about it for the better part of what should have been your sleep time, you had decided to just try and pitch your idea. 

“Do you have an appointment Ms.?” A stunning redhead peered up at you from her desk, her nails clicked on the keyboard of her computer as she waited for your answer. You didn’t really know why you thought getting to Bucky was going to be easy. The security guard had already eyed you suspiciously at the front desk in the lobby. After you’d smiled at him as charmingly as you could, he’d decided to let you be someone else’s problem today - or maybe he just didn’t see you as a threat - whatever it was, it had gotten you this far. But what were you gonna say now?

Actually, I don’t have an appointment, but Mr Barnes met me yesterday and after thinking about him all night, I decided to pay him a visit today.

Yeah, that wouldn’t cut it. Not in this office. The redhead - N. Romanoff - was what her sign said, made that fairly clear with the way her lips pursed at the opened calendar on the screen. 

“You don’t happen to have to discuss something not suited for work with Mr. Barnes, do you? I know he tends to leave some of his meetings... open-ended.” 

Your eyes got wide. “God, no. I’m not-“ Your hands made a swishing motion between you two and then you took a breath. “I’m here to discuss business. Purely business. Mr. Barnes has made an order at my shop for the company fundraiser and I just want to discuss some details.” 

Her eyes glimmered when her lips pulled into a smile. “Did he now?” She peered over to catch the look of the blonde assistant a few feet next to her and then back to you. “Well if that is the case, please have a seat, I’ll tell him you’re here.” And with that, she got up, winked, and wrapped at the large wooden door presumably leading to Bucky’s office. 

She came back a minute later and gestured for you to enter. “Lucky for you, his meeting just got canceled, so you should have enough time.”

“Thank you.” And then Ms. Romanoff went back to her desk and started whispering to the blonde assistant. 

Bucky sat behind his desk, a sleek glass surface lightly cluttered with papers. Other than that, the room felt cool, the large rug by the seating area did little to cover the marbled floors. You stepped inside just as Bucky called out your name. You almost didn't see the wide smile on his face as the rising sun hung low on the horizon behind him, casting a halo-like glow around his silhouette. What a freaking entrance. Though Bucky surely couldn’t control the sun, you thought with a small smile, you really had to stop imagining this man was extraordinary. 

“You’re here.” He got up and walked towards you, his sleek back shoes echoing on the ground. And then he was next to you, leading you to the seat in front of his desk with his hand on the small of your back. “What brings me the honor of your visit, darling.”

He leaned on his desk with his arms crossed, a pleasant smile on his lips. “Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice that you came by, but you do have my number, don’t you?”

“I do.” You cleared your throat, trying to sound as convincing as possible. “I was hoping you had some time to spare, actually. I find the phone to be a little... impersonal.”

Bucky’s eyes shined with intrigue as he leaned forward, pinning you to the chair with his gaze. He licked his lips. “Show me what exactly?”

“You’ll see.” You smirked. “I happen to know that your next meeting just got canceled.”

Bucky got even closer, his breath hitting your neck with every word he spoke. “And I’ll gladly cancel the rest, too.” A shiver shot over your arms, his cologne seemingly intoxicating you. But before you could respond, he backed up, grabbing his coat and gesturing towards the door. “Lead the way.” 

And so you did. 

❁ ❁ ❁

Bucky was suspicious when you pulled him into the subway, but he decided against saying something. He had told you he trusted you after all, and though Bucky considered himself a lot of things, a flake was not one of them. So he let it happen. 

It wasn’t half bad, either. Somewhere between his office door and the train, you had taken his hand in yours to pull him along faster. Bucky had noticed his lips spreading into a smile. It didn't last long, unfortunately. Because as he had made eye contact with an elderly lady who had then proceeded to tell you what a beautiful couple you were, you had pulled your hand away with an awkward laugh. 

‘Oh, God, no, we’re not together, ma’am.’ 

Admittedly, Bucky felt a little sting in his chest ever since. In fact, he was rubbing his hand over his shirt at this very moment. You were walking along a street in Brooklyn, not too far from your shop. The neighborhood was a little more run-down than he was used to, certainly nothing like the part of town he lived in. But he kept quiet still. Maybe he was a little butthurt from your earlier aversion about the couple comment, but to be fair, Bucky wasn’t used to women denying him - except Nat. 

You suddenly stopped, making Bucky almost run into you and then stare at you in question. But when you gestured towards the sign above the two-story building, his gaze softened. 

There, above the blue-painted metal doors, hung a faded sign. Bucky could make out the orange and yellow stripes on the board, a big Sunflower painted in the middle of it all. ‘Sunflower -Shelter & Food’.

“Hey, are you coming or are you glued to the ground?” Your voice rang from the entrance, he hadn’t even noticed that you already moved inside. 

Bucky gulped when his eyes swayed back to you and then down his own body. If he was going to step in there in the outfit he was currently wearing, he would look like the biggest asshole on the planet. 

“I can’t go in there.”

“Why not?”

He just gestured towards his clothes, his Rolex glinting in the sunlight for good measure. But there was no reaction from you. You stood in the doorway, pursing your lips seemingly in thought, and then shrugged your shoulders nonchalantly. “I guess you’ll just have to deal with it then.”

“What?” He called your name. But when he realized you weren’t joking, he caught up to you as fast as possible. Because the only thing worse than showing up there looking like he did was doing it alone, he decided swiftly. 

“‘Think now might be a good time to mention that this is not a very good place for a date,” Bucky mumbled next to you before closing his coat, trying to hide the even more expensive suit beneath. 

“How would you know?” You turned to him. “This isn’t a date, is it?”

Bucky just smirked and then he watched you greet a young boy with a warm hug, and man he imagined what it would be like to have you hug him like that. 

“Peter this is Bucky, Bucky, Peter.” You pulled him towards you by his hand again. “I brought him along to help today, thought we always need an extra pair of hands around here.”

“Pleasure to meet you, sir.” Peter reached his hand out, slightly frowning when he took in his appearance but did not say anything. “Any help is always welcome here. Come, I’ll show you what we’re doing today.” 

Within ten minutes, Bucky had an apron and gloves on and was ordered to cut the biggest stack of potatoes he’d ever seen. You were happily chatting away with the other helpers and Bucky, for the first time in a long time, felt ...normal. 

Nobody was recognizing him in the crowd, there was no talk about business and investments, and there were no fucking cameras. Here, people recognized him for what he came to do, help. And it felt weird. Bucky wasn’t quiet about his lavish lifestyle around his crowds. He knew the privilege he had, and he had worked for it enough to be proud of it. But it was like he had entered a different universe in this part of town. All the things he deemed normal, were things so far from imagination here, they were left out of conversations entirely. So, he tried to remember this whenever he was offered a conversation. 

“You do this every day?” He asked into the kitchen while struggling to peel his 5th potato. 

“Whenever we can.” An older woman answered with a smile. She was the one who had shown him how to use the peeler faster. “They are people just like you and me. They have to eat every day, too, Bucky.”

Bucky just nodded in silence at the humbling answer, his cheeks felt hot with embarrassment at how naive he had been. 

Two hours later, he was standing by your side at the serving station, plating mashed potatoes and the accommodating ‘you’re welcome’ every once in a while. He rarely was out of his comfort zone, like today. But he also knew that, whenever he felt unsure, he’d look at you and you’d gift him an encouraging gesture that kept him going a little while longer. 

After everyone had their food, you gave Bucky a tour of the premises. 

There was a small courtyard, a couple rooms with telephones and a computer, some sofas and pillows. Nothing fancy but functional nonetheless. You led him through every room, explaining curtly what it was for and then you led him up the stairs.

On your way up, you passed Peter, who was helping a child find its toy and Bucky felt a lump form in his throat at all the new impressions he was fed today.

He cleared his throat. “Peter... is he?”

You shook your head. “Not exactly. His parents died when he was quite young. Lucky for him, though, he has always been a bright kid. He got a scholarship for every school he ever went to. But he spends most of his free time here. He has this urge to help wherever he can. Took me a couple months to keep him from skipping his lectures.” You chuckled and led him through the next door. 

Bucky nodded with adoration. Not many people dedicated their time to something that would not benefit them directly. And while Bucky knew what a dedicated mind was capable of, he had to admit that his efforts were always motivated by personal gain. 

“He’s very admirable for that.” 

You just hummed in response. “I don’t think he chose it himself. Not that I think he wouldn’t. But this shelter belonged to his uncle and aunt. They died when he was in high school. He’s working hard to keep this place alive. As do we all.”

The next room you entered was resembling a classroom. “What happens here?”

“Most of the children are registered for the public school of this district. But they don’t always make it there. This room gives them the opportunity to catch up on missed work. We also have adult classes here, preparing for job interviews and such.”

The next hallway presented doors, all leading to bedrooms, as you explained to Bucky when you walked through the corridor. The last door was larger than the others - a double swing leading to a big sanitary area. Showers, toilets, and sinks lined the walls - all run down but functional. 

“This place could use some serious renovating,” Bucky mumbled, but he was sure you had heard him. Because you looked up at him now, a sad smile decorating your beautiful face. 

“We try to make it as clean and cozy as possible here, but we just don’t have the necessary financial means for it. It works for now. The people coming here need very little. But it’s only a matter of time until the roof needs redoing or the pipes or the windows, or the-“

“Yeah...” Bucky trailed off, making you stop and giving him a break to breathe. He usually wasn’t surrounded by people unable to get out of unfortunate situations. The clients he spent his time with ordered his services to protect the material things they’d bought for status and fun. It was something entirely different when you were robbed of your place to sleep. 

“Well, this completes my humble tour.” You clasped your hands together and proceeded to look at your watch. “I think it’s time to go home.”

You descended the stairs in silence, Peter hugged Bucky goodbye and when he stepped foot back on the sidewalk, Bucky turned around to the sign once more. You stood beneath it, leaning against the doorframe and smiling at him. It was dark out now. 

“Are you not coming?” He asked watching as you shook your head. 

“Peter has an exam tomorrow. I offered to stay the night.”

“Here? Alone?”

“Yes.” 

Bucky stepped towards you again. “Then I’m go-“

“Stop.” Your hand reached for his shoulder, the touch sending him straight back to a haze. “Don’t do this. I know how you feel. There’s this sadness inside you now. You saw this for the first time. It feels awful - I know.” You retracted your hand and pushed yourself off the doorframe. “But until you don’t see anything other than pity for these people, you can’t be here without breaking.”

“Doll...”

“Bucky, I'm serious. Go home. Sleep on it. Try to understand the situation.” 

Bucky couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this helpless. He just stared at you, unable to move or say anything. He didn’t like the idea of you staying here alone at night. And though the feeling of caring for someone he’d only known for two days so much scared him, he pushed it aside. 

You leaned forward and hugged him goodbye and then the cold night surrounded him again. “Thank you for trusting me today.” And then you turned around and left him standing outside alone. 

❁ ❁ ❁

Your purple-inked pen marked the date in your calendar. 

“That’s an unusually big order, Steve...” You looked up at the blonde frequenting your shop every so often. He’d always get the pink carnations for his girlfriend. Apparently, she loved them after you bound them in the first bouquet you ever sold to Steve. He was a simple man, you could tell, so his usual orders were just as such. But not today. “Are you planning anything special?”

The handsome customer blushed with an innocent smile. “Actually...” He scratched the back of his neck. “I’m planning to propose.” He looked so sheepish when you clasped your hands in excitement.

“Oh, that’s amazing. Congratulations!”

“Well not yet.” He cleared his throat, visibly trying to compose himself. But this giant pretty man in front of you was adorably nervous. 

“I just know she’ll say yes,” you mused and made a note to reserve some more carnations for his order - a couple simple arrangements that held so much meaning.

“How do you know?”

You watched Steve peer over to you with hopeful eyes. “It’s not every day a man puts so much effort and thought into what bouquet to get his girlfriend on a casual Monday evening each week.” You winked and Steve nodded lost in thought. 

“To be honest, I haven’t even thought about her saying no. I wouldn’t know what to do with myself.”

“You shouldn’t worry too much. You are a good man, everyone can see that. And just to be sure, I’ll make the most perfect flowers ever. Paired with your charming ways, there will be no other option but to say yes.”

He relaxed a little. “Great. Thank you.” And then he turned to leave your shop. 

“I’ll have them ready by Friday.” You smiled. 

“Thank you... so much.” Steve smiled and you knew there was so much more hidden in his gesture.

❁ ❁ ❁

It had become a habit that Bucky visited the shelter with you once a week. Admittedly, you were surprised he even cared enough to free his schedule so religiously. But as of the past four weeks, he had shown up at your shop, walked with you to Sunflower shelters, mingled with the people, and then even walked you home. 

It was actually kind of refreshing, seeing him so invested and kind of protective. There weren’t many guys in the city that cared enough to get you home safely. Peter offered more times than often, but you rather knew him safe at the shelter than try to fight a gangster double his size out of the kindness of his heart and the deep wish to somehow become a superhero one day.

So Bucky had to do it for now. Not that you were complaining. He was handsome and charming and interesting to converse with given the vastly different lives you lived. But he tried to adapt. Ever since the incident on the first day, he had even tried to wear less wealth-telling clothing, though he seemed to not always hit the mark just right. 

In a way, bucky was a little fashion icon. You’d noticed it in his colorful waistcoats, the intricate details on his shoes, or the fancy cufflinks adorning his oxford-cotton shirts. He tried to dress down. But to your surprise, the color remained. Instead of waistcoats and dress shirts, he wore regular t-shirts. His confidence never wavered.  

A little smile hushed across your face every time you looked at him. The pink shirt he wore combined with the green apron he had been given, made him look like a lollipop. A Beautiful one, that was. With a dashing smile and an adorable frown as he tried to separate the peas from the pod. 

“So... how is the gala coming along?” You teased him a little having noticed how unusual this task was for him. Throughout your few meetings, you had gotten to know Bucky quite well. And apart from his statement the very day he stepped foot into your shop, he revealed to you more and more how difficult the project was for him.

“Let’s just say I’m glad I can count on the flower arrangements,” he grumbles as a pea slipped from his fingers and across the table. 

“That bad, huh?”

His hands stopped working. “The Band canceled on me again and I seem to run after every other arrangement I have made so far. If I had known how much work-“ he huffed and then shook his head with an even deeper frown. 

“Hey, it’s okay to not be good at everything.” You encouraged him, your elbow nudging his side as you smiled lightly. “There has got to be something humbling you. Makes you seem more human.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“I meant to ask you...” You picked up your task to avoid his eyes that were suddenly on you again. “How come you’re the one organizing the gala?”

Bucky chuckled, his head shaking for what seemed like the hundredth time today. “I made a deal with my assistant.” 

“What was in it for you?” You threw a couple peas in the strainer and Bucky did the same.

He shrugged. “I got to hand off some paperwork.”

Wow. “Seriously? A bit of paperwork seems like a poor trade for months of organizing something so important.”

Bucky laughed, the sound warming your stomach from the inside out and finally making you look at him again. It was little moments like this in which he felt so careless and relaxed. You liked to believe the shelter did it to him, or maybe even you. But primarily, you were glad he laid off his work self just then. “Yeah it might have not been my smartest move... but I don’t mind it really.”

“Why’s that?” Your eyes locked and you suddenly became very aware of how close the two of you were standing. 

“If it weren’t for the deal, I would have never met you.” There was something so honest and pure about the way he had stated this so plainly. And for a moment, you liked to forget that he might have just meant your suggestion to donate to Sunflower. That maybe, the funny fluttery feeling in your stomach wasn’t one-sided, and that you too meant something greater to him than the coincidences that led him into your shop that day. 

A wide smile spread on Bucky’s face and then he winked. He freaking winked at you. And while you turned back to your peas, desperate to hide the fluster on your face, you had to remind yourself that this was Bucky fucking Barnes and that he knew what he was doing.

About two hours later, you sat amongst the people currently living at the shelter, sharing the meal you had prepared for them with the hopes of getting them through another day. You and Bucky were sitting with Gabe Jones, a veteran whose post-traumatic stress disorder had cost him everything after the Vietnam War. He was always telling stories of his time on the front - a way to cope with his horrible past. By now, you and Peter had probably heard every single one of his stories twice. But Bucky was on the edge of his seat. Listening with intrigue as the food on his plate remained untouched. 

“It was ’68 when I was sent out. There were soldiers who done already survived a year or so at the front. And, son, I am sayin’ survived ‘cause you couldn’t call that livin’.” Gabe shook his head before pointing his fork to his shoulder. “Caught a grenade in ’69 and on our way to camp, they shot at the helicopter. Lost my right arm and comrade that day. The damn arm’s gone but I’m gon’ have the memory forever.”

The words didn’t seem to affect the veteran anymore, but they never failed to leave their recipients shocked and wondering. It was always the same question: How can someone fight for a country, leave their life for a country, and end up here?

And honestly? You didn’t know. 

“I’m so sorry, sir.” Bucky swallowed as his eyes fled over to yours. “Thank you for your service.”

“Notin’ to be sorry ‘bout.” Gabe waved his hand and then pointed at Bucky’s plate. “You eatin’ that?” 

Bucky just shook his head and pushed his plate towards Gabe, a somber state overtaking his body. You did feel a little bad. But you also knew that Gabe wasn’t affected by sympathies and that he was happy at Sunflower - though he preferred the street over the beds here. While he had spent just another day existing, he had simultaneously opened Bucky’s eyes to the severity of making stories like his more known. 

By now you were pretty confident, Bucky would choose the homeless as recipients for his company’s fundraiser sum. But he surprised you by getting involved with the people here over and over again, willing to learn and to understand. 

The walk to your apartment building that evening was awfully quiet. Bucky had insisted he walk on the street side of the sidewalk, buried his hands in his coat pockets, and shut up ever since.

You knew he was contemplating, letting the day play on repeat in his mind. He probably had a lot of questions, a lot of frustration, and worry. Nothing unfamiliar to you, but something you’d learned to deal with ever since helping out at Sunflower. 

“Don’t feel bad,” you said when you stopped in front of the familiar brick building you called home. 

“How?”

“Feeling bad isn’t helping them. You have the power to change things.” It was an awfully dry response, but the truth hurt sometimes. 

Bucky just looked at you through hooded eyes, a knowing nod shaking his features as he watched slowly take a step back toward your front door. 

“Thank you,” he suddenly released - steady and calm. “For taking me. For helping me see...” 

You couldn’t help yourself. The confession overwhelmed you. Knowing you had succeeded in showing him what was so important to you overwhelmed you. You leaped forward and slung your arms around him, pressing tightly into his chest. 

Bucky’s arms found their way around you in an instant, the hug conveying so much more than just a goodbye. It was a ‘thank you’ a ‘this means the world to me’.

After about a minute, you leaned up to him and placed a kiss to his cheek. “I’m also glad you took the deal, Bucky.” You whispered into his ear, feeling the smile on his face on your cheek. 

When he finally released you, it seemed like the spell was gone. Bucky was back to burying his hands in his pockets, only the faint remnants of a smile hinting towards your earlier interaction. You hadn’t realized how much this would affect him. You had forgotten how long you fought with yourself until you could act normal around the people at Sunflower yourself. 

“Do you want to come up?” You threw your thumb over your shoulder at the entrance of the building with a lopsided smile. “Don’t want that cheap bottle of merlot to go bad.”

Bucky’s eyes brightened underneath the street lights and the wide boyish grin returned to his face. “We can’t have that, can we?”

❁ ❁ ❁

To say Bucky’s heart had skipped a beat at your invitation would have been an understatement. It did somersaults and ended with an impressive backflip. He’d not expected a move from your side. Especially, since the last time he had picked you up, the universe had flipped him the bird by sending two of his former one-night-stands your way. He had been able to shake them off before they were able to yell at him or reveal more of what their connection to him was. But that marked the first time he was a little embarrassed by his late endeavors. You had acted like nothing happened, but since that night, Bucky hadn’t stopped wondering what you thought of him. 

You lead him up the narrow staircase to a red wooden door, the color chipping by the floor as an indicator of having to kick it to open sometimes. Beyond the door, it was cozy and warm. Every corner of your place had a memory placed in it - a self-made quilt or a photograph. When you walked through it, Bucky could feel the love and time this place had seen. 

It was nothing like his own apartment: a penthouse standing high above the city, with sleek black surfaces and cold marble wherever you reached. Here, he felt the need to take his shoes off, to feel the fuzzy carpets on the scratched-up wooden floors. Your place wasn’t sterile like his, it felt... like a good hug. 

Bucky snorted as the result of a breath he released. Never before had he cared about what his place lacked. It was expensive and pristine, clean and big. And even though your apartment was about the size of his living room, it had so much more to offer. 

“The living room is right through there, you can choose a movie if you like.” Your voice called out from somewhere Bucky assumed to be the kitchen as he kicked off his shoes and made himself comfortable on the rust-colored sofa that had more pillows than necessary. It was super comfortable, though. And the lack of space due to the pillows forced you to sit a little closer to him, so he wasn’t complaining.

“Your place is... cute.” He stated as you handed him a glass of wine and laughed. 

“It’s a shoebox but I do love it very much. Probably nothing compared to what you’re used to.”

Bucky shook his head and took a sip. The wine did taste cheap, but he did not care. “Bigger isn’t always better.” His arm was spread on the backrest but your whole body was turned to him. “It has a lot of character.”

“Oh god, please stop, you’re just making it sound worse.” Your hand came up to hide your face but your smile peeked through the gesture. 

Bucky laughed. “I didn’t mean it condescendingly. I really do like it. Reminds me of my childhood home.”

“Are you close with your family?” Bucky was surprised by the question. Maybe it was because his friends never talked about his family, or because the peers he hung out with tended to discuss business rather than sentimental. But he realized that nobody had asked him about it for a long time.

And so he began talking. Bucky talked about his parents and how both of them died early in his life. He told you how close he was with his sister until she got adopted into another family. He spoke about his childhood with Steve and how they’d met Sam and Tony in college, about the night they had the idea for Shield Protective Services, and finally the day he was told his sister had passed away. 

Throughout his story, you had leaned into him closer, hanging onto his every word until your hand had to support your body on his thigh and Bucky suddenly stopped talking. 

Your glasses were emptied, the bottle as well, and Bucky gulped when he felt the heat from your hand travel throughout his entire body. 

“So... that’s my story.” He had to clear his throat to gain his usual timber back, his hands becoming sweaty when you blinked next to him. “What about you, dove?”

“Dove?” You smiled, yet intrigued by the name that had slipped past his lips in the trance of the moment. He’d only ever called you that in his thoughts. Attributed the nickname to you the second he realized it was the most fitting one of them all. 

“You don’t like it?” He asked, his arm slipping towards your shoulder ever so slightly. 

“I like it.” You smiled. “I just want to know... why this one?”

A hush of giddiness crawled up his throat when he thought about his answer. It was the way you had welcomed him so easily into this world of yours. How you were willing to show him the things precious to you. That you trusted him with this very opportunity to help. Every day he spent with you he felt it, found that between coding his new security program and meeting with Hydra enterprises, its somber reality sent him into a feeling of breathing fresh air. You created a button that turned off the noise in his head. “Because you bring me peace.”

Your eyes stared at him in wonder when he tilted your chin with his thumb and index finger. There was appreciation and happiness, he could see it, feel it. 

Bucky was entranced by your stare when your voice whispered a response to him: “That’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever been told.”

You leaned forward and Bucky’s heart threatened to jump out of his chest, and then your face fell into his chest, your arms encasing him in the warmest hug he’d ever received. He willed his pulse to slow and wrapped his arms around you tightly. A little humbled and a little confused, but appreciative of the situation nonetheless. 

You stayed like this when you chose a movie to watch. Even after an hour, Bucky’s grip didn’t loosen. He peered down at you on his chest and watched as you fell asleep. And when he was sure you were far away in your slumber, he pressed a warm kiss to your head, lingering in the scent of your shampoo.  

❁ ❁ ❁

Bucky stared at his computer screen as the pen in his hand clicked on his glass desk in perfect rhythm. The Shelter website displayed on the surface, portraying a brighter version of the sign you had dragged him to that very first day. 

But it wasn’t the heartfelt story behind the building or the way his pen clicked slightly more hollow every other tap because he turned it too much that had him zoned out at work. It was - as unbelievable as it sounded - a woman. Not just any, no. You. 

“Hey, I need a signature from you for this design draft.” Steve dropped his notepad on the desk, then rounded it and settled behind Bucky who had yet to recognize his presence. 

“This your charity suggestion?” He questioned with his hands on his friend’s office chair. 

Bucky nodded absentmindedly. Perhaps it was because he had decided to support your suggestion the second you had taken his hand on his way to the subway. Or maybe he was just letting his mind roam freely again. Mainly because it was a safe bet to call you into memory and he liked the feeling it provided. 

A pale hand waved in front of his face. “Earth to Bucky.” Steve snapped his fingers, making the brunette jump. “You seem oddly distracted.”

He had been thinking about you. Of course, he had. There seemed to be nothing else he could do lately. Every time Bucky read through his reports, he imagined what your voice would sound like reading them to him. Whenever he went down to IT, he envisioned the room decorated with your flowers and how much happier they would make the place. When he sat in a meeting with HR and watched their burnt-out faces stare back at him through their coffee haze, he wondered if you could make them as lively as you made him. 

Bucky could - so he realized after weeks of denial - not escape you. 

That was one thing. But the more chilling revelation was that he did not mind. He enjoyed the little admonitions his mind set out in his environment. He appreciated the quickening thumb in his chest, whenever he saw his calendar entries stating another meeting with you - so much so that he almost forgot how unusual it was for him. 

It was crazy. A month ago, if someone had dared to tell him he’d be finding something more than his regular flings, he would have laughed in their face. In fact, he actually did a few days before he met you. 

Bucky didn’t know what kind of magical spell you’d put on him, but within a few weeks, he’d started to become a different man. A better version of his thought-to-be-marvelous self. Now he realized what he was missing: a counterpart, someone who made life seem dull without them by his side. He wasn’t going to admit it to Sam or Steve immediately, but the idea of you being that very someone became more attractive each day. 

“Just a lot to do with the gala and all...” Bucky trailed off and spun around to Steve. 

“You know, I never took you for an event manager...” The blonde grinned and his eyes lit up in the office light. “Don’t take this the wrong way, I like seeing you try something new, but this feels very... out of place.”

“But you also know I never back down from a challenge. And I’ll be damned if Nat has something to hold against me for life.”

Steve’s head tipped forward. “We both know that woman has blackmail material for two lifetimes on us. 

“She really does.” Bucky sighed and then slumped back in his chair, the little issue he had been hiding from his best friend gnawing on his mind. 

He thought about Steve and Bambi and how he had just asked her to marry him. She’d said yes, of course, nobody expected otherwise. Steve - of all people - was living a magical fairytale life with the woman of his dreams. And here Bucky was, thinking he had figured it all out with women and relationships - or rather that he never wanted one - yet he found himself wondering why that decision bugged him so much when you came into the picture. 

“Can I ask you something?” Bucky squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep breath, not believing he was really going to ask Steve for dating advice.

“Always.”

“How did you know that Bambi was the one?” A stupid question, really. Bucky already knew there was nobody like you. But it was best to start this conversation off lightly.

Steve smiled widely again, his cheeks tinted pink. “Well, I couldn’t stop thinking about her. And not in an I haven’t touched a woman in years kind of way... I couldn’t stop. Every second of every day, I imagined her with me. The thought of her made me happier even before she knew how I felt about her. And, well, it also hurt like hell when I thought she didn’t return my feelings... when she refused to talk to me for a day...” He cleared his throat and then eyed Bucky again. “Why do you want to know?”

“Nothing in particular. I was just wondering and I needed material for my best man speech.” But the blonde didn’t buy it. He caught Bucky’s chair when he attempted to turn away, pulling him right back in front of him. “Are you dating someone? Is it that woman from the flower shop?”

How did he know about you? “No??” Bucky squinted at Steve. 

“You know if you wanted advice, I do consider myself an expert to some extent now.” Bucky wanted to wipe the smug grin right off his friend’s face. 

“You’re an idiot.” He stood up and paced to the window.

“Oh come on, Buck.” Steve followed suit, the playful grin ever present. “You teased me for years about my love life, can’t be mad now.”

“I’m not mad.” He was annoyed. 

They stood by the glass front for a while, watching the busy city unfold beneath them in the glow of the rising sun. Bucky could feel his friend’s eyes stare at him though. And after another moment of silence, the blonde finally spoke. “You should ask her out.”

“What?” He faced him again. 

“You like her. I can tell. And you’ve never acted like this about a woman, let alone put so much effort into a relationship. I know it’s not your style, but I think it would do you good to at least try.”

“The effort is for the gala.” Bucky corrected. 

“Right. Because that’s your thing... charity galas.” Steve squeezed Bucky’s shoulder and then tapped it and then he made his way to the door. “I’m not going to tell you what to do, but I really wish you would listen to your heart and not be a stubborn dickhead for once. This could be something life-changing - something great. And it’s your choice whether you welcome it or not.”

Life changing. Bucky didn’t like the sound of that. He liked to be in control of the situation and rule over his own life. However that aspect seemed to have left the building when you entered. 

He huffed. There you were back on his mind again, and he felt the tingle creep up his throat. There was no denying it. What Steve had described with Bambi was what Bucky had with you. 

With a shake of his head, he grabbed his coat, told Nat he’d be back in an hour, and then pressed the button for the elevator. He would deny it if Steve ever dared to take pride in convincing him to do so, but he’d also be damned if he didn’t at least try to find out if you felt the same. 

❁ ❁ ❁

There was a burly-looking stranger standing at the counter when Bucky entered your shop. He had willed the traitorous voice in his head to silence all the way here. But now that he saw the handsome older man taking all your attention to the point you hadn’t even noticed him stepping in over the customer's broad shoulders, the heat began to bubble up again. 

Bucky wanted to tell himself you wouldn’t prefer the salt-and-pepper-bearded man over him. But to be honest, he didn’t even know what your type was. Yes, you had cuddled on your sofa just the other night, but since Bucky wouldn’t consider himself an expert in anything other than one-night stands, it could have been a friendly gesture for all he knew. 

“Would that be all for you?” You asked the man and handed him his chance. Bucky watched as his thumb grazed over your hand, feeling a tinge of anger starting to consume him.  

“That’s all. Thank you, sweetheart.”

“I hope to see you again soon, sir.”

“Oh, you can bet on it.” He winked then turned, nodded to Bucky in a brief greeting, and then exited the shop. Bucky’s eyes lingered on the door for a while longer. He took deep breaths as his jaw clenched and the bell above the entrance fell silent. 

“Hey.” A warm hand touched his arm, pulling him right back to your eyes. And just like that, the anger washed away a little. There were just you and him in your tiny oasis amid Brooklyn. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” He forced a smile, but the frown on his face probably betrayed him. “Just thought that man was a little inappropriate.” 

“He’s just a sweet man buying flowers for his wife.” Your eyes glimmered with mischief when you bit your lip. “Bucky... are you jealous?”

Oh, hell no.

“Jealous?” Bucky wasn’t jealous. He couldn’t be. There was nothing to be jealous of. He had no claim to you. Even if he really wished he did. And yet that man had angered him with only the touch of his hand. That was the only thing he’d ever get. Bucky knew what it felt like to have you in his arms, how your body lotion settled in his nose, how your head fit perfectly in the crook of his neck. “No.”

“But you should not be so naïve, dove. Married men are also flirting... and cheating.”

A short laugh escaped your throat before you caught yourself again and Bucky’s heart began doing that funny somersault thing. “Not to burst your bubble or anything, but I do know how the real world works.” You crossed your arms before your chest. “Besides, what do you care if he did ask me out? Maybe it has been a lifelong dream of mine to be a mistress.”

“It’s not. And I don’t. I just think you deserve someone better than a cheater.”

“Oh, like who? The percentage of good guys in this city is disappointingly low.”

Bucky snorted, guided by the excitement in his chest he opened his arms. “Please, I could name at least five guys off the top of my head who are better than whatever that was.” His left hand flailed in the direction of the door, referring to the previous customer. 

“Name one.”

“Me.”

The surprise sprung onto your features faster than Bucky realized what he had said. “What?” 

Well, this was certainly not the way he had planned to ask you out today. Damn jealousy. The only way for this to not be embarrassing was to own up to it now. It was what he had come here for after all, right?

Bucky looked directly into your eyes, his expression sincere and determined. "Yes, me. I may not have everything figured out, but I do know one thing: I care about you. I've seen the way you light up a room, the kindness you show to everyone around you. You deserve someone who sees that, who appreciates it.”

Your eyes softened when you shook your head, averting your gaze to the ground. “I don’t know, Bucky.”

He bit the insides of his cheeks, instantly hoping you’d say something else. Anything that would show him there was a chance you would change your mind. The silence was all-consuming, but he kept his mouth shut, careful not to fuck it up once again. 

“Bucky, I appreciate your honesty, I really do. But I don't think it's a good idea.”

Bucky's brows furrowed, his confidence wavering as your soft refusal hit him. "What do you mean, you don't know?" he asked, his tone tinged with a hint of frustration. He struggled to keep his composure, the unfamiliar feeling of rejection gnawing at him. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he searched for the right thing to say. His jaw tensed, betraying the hurt he felt deep down. "Forget it," he muttered, his voice barely above a whisper. With a curt nod, he turned on his heel, his disappointment palpable in the air as he made his exit, leaving you to contemplate his unexpected confession.

❁ ❁ ❁

“Why, don’t you just look precious!” You bent down and picked up Sam’s daughter, Darla, who had eagerly stormed through the door as soon as he’d opened it because she wasn’t quite tall enough to reach the handle yet. 

“You... I’ve missed you soooo much.” You nuzzled her into your chest and pretended to squeeze real tight. 

“Come play dragons with me!” The little one squirmed and then hopped off in her tiny knight costume.

“Nothing I would rather do,” you singsonged and then mouthed a ‘she’s grown so much’ to Sam before he closed the door with a shake of his head. 

“I know... she just does it without my permission. Unbelievable.”

About ten minutes later, you sat on the living room floor with a bunch of stuffed dragons, you had been instructed to play. Sam’s daughter was happily fighting the stuffies with her wooden sword and his husband handed you a cup of coffee with a smile. 

“So how have things been?” Matt sat down on the sofa and Sam instantly wrapped his arm around him. Your eyes lingered on the interaction for a second before your gaze wandered back to Darla. 

“Oh, you know, business as usual. The shop is doing very well... the shelters are holding up.” You smiled at her and then made a dragon fall backward in defeat. 

“Hm...” He frowned. “That’s weird... I had a feeling it was getting better soon.”

You smiled tight-lipped and wondered if you had butchered it all with your stubbornness. Matt wasn’t clairvoyant or anything crazy like it. But the joke of his other senses being heightened due to his impaired vision had carried on forever. And even though you never believed in supernatural magical things, you couldn’t help but wonder if maybe, there was a hunch of truth to it nonetheless. He had been right about many other things after all. 

“I don’t know,” you sighed and Darla excused herself to her room to ‘get more toys’. “Except for the shop, everything else seems to go a little downhill right now.”

“But you have been seeing someone, no?” Matt tilted his head and Sam squeezed his shoulder in an attempt to make him stop. 

“Babe, do we need to talk about appropriate prying again?” 

“Sorry,” Matt blushed, “Occupational hazard.”

You laughed and then turned serious again. “I have... but to be honest, I doubt it will have a future. It’s - I don’t know - it just seems a little too good to be true.”

“It’s been Bucky you’ve been seeing, hasn’t it?” Sam chimed in with a calm deep voice, making your attention snap to him. Your heart began to race at the mention of Bucky’s name. 

“How did you know?”

His fingers lifted in air quotes “A gorgeous girl with a flower shop in Brooklyn that somehow tries to convince him to donate to Sunflower shelters? You did not make it hard, honey.”

“He... he talks to you about me?” Well, that changes things, you thought as you watched Sam reassure you with a small smile. 

"More like a little birdy told me...." Sam shrugged. “What happened?” He leaned forward slightly, his eyes holding concern.

“Isn’t it obvious? I don’t want to be one of his many trophies. And I’m scared, I just made the chase attractive by not putting out immediately.” Your eyes turned glassy. “What if he will lose interest when I do.” Your voice broke, making you almost whisper the last part into the living room. “Because I really really want to...”

Matt cleared his throat. “If it helps anything... I have a feeling you are not going to be just another one-night stand.”

“And why is that?”

“I’ve never seen him like this.” Sam chimed in. “So butthurt about a girl or even put effort in a relationship that would only become a one night stand - which it is not - he wants more, he needs more. He sees a future with you. And as much as his bad-boy demeanor has made that pretty unbelievable in the past, he is changing. I just know, and it’s about time that he aims for peace and quiet and love and comfort.”

Turning your head with a suspicious grin, you answered: “Is Matt contagious? Because that sounded one hell of a lot like a prediction to me.”

Sam just shook his head with a smile, scooted forward on the sofa, and then took your hands in his. “Believe me when I say this: You are so amazing. And not even a douchebag like Bucky could deny it. Yes, he has had his fair share of women in the past, and he can be the most stubborn dickhead in all of New York City, but he’s not stupid. He knows something valuable when he sees it. And you, love, have given him the most precious thing he’s ever had.”

You held eye contact for a short moment, letting your friend’s words sink in and warm you from the inside until the butterflies in your stomach began to tingle. As much as you wanted to refuse, you had shown him love and acceptance every step of the way. And Bucky? Bucky had tried so hard to impress you. He had done so many things just for you, to spend time with you.

You just wrote it off as a means to get you to sleep with him. But at this point, that argument was farfetched. Because throughout the time you spent together, his presence was pleasant, casual, and... wanted. 

“So what do I do now?” You said with determination, making a smile spark on both Sam’s and Matt’s faces.

❁ ❁ ❁

“So, Barnes is unusually grumpy tonight.” Bucky heard Tony say when he came back from the bathroom, jamming his glas on the table to announce he was listening. “Did you get cockblocked or what?”

“Shut it, Stark, or I’ll personally demonstrate your very own cockblock.” Bucky pressed through his teeth. 

“Damn, Buck. What the hell could possibly throw you off this much?” Tony signaled for two more drinks to the bar as Bucky took a seat again. 

Sam looked at him with a raised brow - the fucker knew what was going on. But Bucky refused to get dragged into talking about his feelings. 

“I thought it was going good?” Steve chimed in, a question in his features. Steve, you punk. Shut up!

Bucky knew he was referring to the bouquets of flowers that subtly decorated the office now. First his own desk, then the kitchen. And when Nat had grown suspicious, he proceeded to place them on her desk to have her stop asking questions. 

It wasn’t his doing - not this time. You had just given him a bouquet of the flowers you couldn’t sell anymore every time you met. And Bucky couldn’t bring himself to throw them out. They also reminded him of you and were a nice little distraction from work. ...Not that it mattered anymore.

“Going good? What is going on? What are you talking about, Rogers?”

“Bucky met a- ouch goddamnit!” A kick was heard from beneath the table. And when Steve’s eyes snapped over to Sam, the man just tipped his head with a warning stare. “What the hell, man?”

“Okay, that’s it. I feel like you guys don’t tell me anything. I need details. Now.”

“No.”

Bucky didn’t need Tony to know. In fact, Bucky didn’t need anyone to know he had trouble talking to a woman. He, of all people, who never had any difficulties getting even the married ones - yeah he wasn’t too proud of that... But Tony would just make everything worse. And with his patience hanging by a thread right about now, he was not willing to play with fire. 

“Buck, we- they’re your friends. They deserve to know, especially if things are as serious as you told me.” Bucky just stared at Steve in silence, his gaze trained on the crystal class in front of him with the amber liquid untouched. Steve always had a need to calm the storm. And maybe, Bucky would let him do it this time. 

Truthfully, Bucky couldn’t imagine a life without you anymore. His friends would sooner or later hear about you - if he had not fucked it up entirely. So, it was better to rip the band-aid off now than peel it back painfully slow in the future. 

He crossed his arms and exchanged a brief glance with the blonde, and Steve understood that he was allowed to proceed. 

“Bucky met someone. He’s organizing the charity gala this year and she’s the florist doing the flower arrangements.” He had never noticed it before, but ever since Bambi had entered Steve’s life, his best friend’s fable for romance became more and more apparent to Bucky. 

“She’s also helped him find a cause to donate to. She’s been taking him to the Shelter she has worked at for years,” Sam chimed in and Bucky didn’t even question where he got his information from anymore. Steve and he had always been close, and though Bucky didn’t believe Steve would tell Sam his most private conversations, Sam always had a way of finding out. 

“Event planning? Florist? Who are you and what have you done to Bucky?” Tony looked seriously stunned, But Bucky didn’t expect anything less than incomprehension. He had always been the only one in the group Tony could relate to and talk to when it came to women and lifestyles. Now, that very thing was slipping away. 

Bucky just shrugged, uncertain how to answer. It was true: He had changed quite a bit ever since meeting you. But they weren't bad changes. He actually liked them. 

Steve cleared his throat. “I thought things were going great, just the other day he talked about asking her out. And there were all these flowers in the office, I just assumed...”

“Yeah well, they weren’t.” Bucky interrupted as he felt the frustration creep back up. There were so many new feelings mixing within him that he didn’t know what to do with them. 

“Well it’s good to have you back, I guess. Can’t imagine how that would’ve turned out.” Tony’s hand landed on Bucky’s shoulder, who immediately brushed it off. 

“What do you mean ‘turned out’?”

His head swayed from left to right and his hands turned outward. “Well, we all agree it would have never worked out right? You’re not the one for relationships and she was clearly using you for that charity money.”

What the actual fuck?

“You don’t know her. So don’t you dare assume anything about her.” Bucky sprung up, his hands hitting the table with a thump. “Dove has the kindest, most beautiful soul on this earth.” He wouldn’t let Tony, of all people, insult you. Not you. Not his dove. And, yes, maybe it also hurt a little that his friend did not believe Bucky could change for something truly important. And maybe it scratched his ego that this might have been the reason for your rejection the other day. But all of that seemed unimportant now. 

“Look at you growing all protective.”

“Tony.” Steve’s condescending tone rumbled over the booth. 

A look at Tony and Bucky wanted to smack the smirk off his face. Another look at Sam, whose eyes had grown soft with empathy. And one last look at Steve, who’d only wanted him to be as happy as him. Damn it. 

“You wouldn’t fucking know what I’m talking about, Stark.”

And then he stormed out of the Ironbar and into the night, head fuming, heart racing, and only one thing on his mind. 

❁ ❁ ❁

You were pretty sure Bucky would have kicked your door down had you not opened it the second time he wrapped his fist against it. Now he was standing in front of you, cheeks reddened from the cool night air, chest rising with deep breaths, but still devilishly handsome. 

“Hey, Bucky!” You smiled until you noticed the irritated look in his eyes. “What are you doing here?”

He seemingly ignored you, stepping into your home and then turning once you closed the door. “Do you think I can change?”

“What?”

“Do you believe I could change? That I could become the person you would date?” His eyes were pleasing, his head cocked to the side - fidgedy.

“Is... is this about the other day?”

Bucky looked nervous, vulnerable even. “Just answer my question, please.”

“I believe everyone has the ability to change. But I also know not everyone wants to.” You looked at your hands, suddenly feeling a bit awkward.

“Then why... why do you think I haven’t. Through all the times we’ve gone to the shelter, through all the conversations. I’ve never had that with someone before... what I have with you.”

There it was. You knew you had to talk to him about it sooner or later. Sam and Matt had suggested as much. You just didn't know it would be this soon.

“Bucky, I just don’t want to end up as one of the women passing you on the street, throwing side eyes at the newest one you’re having on your arm.” Yeah... that encounter had been a rather awkard one. Not to mention how nervous you were that night, hopig Bucky had only played it cool in order to protect you.

“See, but that wouldn’t happen to you, dove. It wouldn’t. Because I realized that you are the reason that makes me want to change.” Bucky's gaze softened as he spoke, his tone gentle yet resolute he stepped closer. “I'm not perfect, but I promise you this: I'll always try my best for you. So, yeah, maybe it's a long shot, but I think I could be good for you. And if you'd give me the chance, I'd love to show you.” He took your hands in his, then closed his eyes and came even closer. “I know I'd treat you right.”

Throughout his confession, your gaze never faltered from his face. You could feel the desperate honesty in his tone, in the way his hands lightly trembled. He was scared, and he lay that emotion in your hands - for you to do whatever you needed with it. 

Your voice was shaky when you answered, a light hue of shame fogging the question on the tip of your tongue. “But how do I know...?” That this is not what you’re telling every woman in this godforsaken city? 

But Bucky understood. Because apparently that pull you'd had toward him had been there for a reason. “Because the things you make me feel scare me.” His face was mere inches from yours now, you could see every speck of color in his irises. “They scare me because I’ve never felt them before. Every time I’m not with you, I think of you. In every situation I am in alone, I imagine how much more exciting it would be with you in it. I’m going crazy. I’m lost without you, dove.”

A single tear ran down your face at his confession. This moment felt so raw, his words so sincere. But most importantly, it made your heart pound with excitement. 

“Will you be mine?” His forehead leaned against yours, his hands moving up your arms and to your neck. “Please say yes,” he whispered and his breath tickled your nose. 

He just felt so right. Bucky felt right in your home, in your arms, in your life. “Yes.” You finally answered and as soon as the syllable left your mouth, his lips came crashing onto yours. 

Within seconds, Bucky had you pressed against the door. His hands held your face lovingly, his hands warm and big on your skin. The kiss was deep and so unbelievably pure, it punched the breath from your lunges the second your lips connected. And suddenly you knew that Bucky’s words held far less emptiness than you had feared. Nobody could kiss like this and not be sincere. At least you hoped it to be true because once you’d gotten a taste, you knew you would never want to try anything else. You could get drunk off him. Forever.

Your hands wandered beneath Bucky’s coat, settling in the warmth of his back beneath the thick wool and feeling the muscles ripple when he pulled you even closer. 

You sighed into him because the moment felt so right, so perfect, so tailored to the two of you and Bucky brushed his tongue over your bottom lip. The tingle from the gesture traveled down your spine. Before you could hold yourself back, you let his touch swallow you whole. 

❁ ❁ ❁

Bucky moaned, a feeling so warm and enjoyable taking over his body with every breath you stole from him. He had wanted for this to happen for weeks. And the real thing did not disappoint. 

Your hands roamed his back until they hooked onto his shoulders and began shrugging off his coat. He tried hard to keep your lips on his during the action, not wanting to miss a single moment without them anymore. You were here, you were his, and it was perfect. 

“Bucky,” you whimpered when his thigh made its way between your legs. A move so instinctually feeling for him. But all the other women he’d been with before only seemed like practice now. Preparation to be the best lover you’ve ever had and ever will have. Because you were the real thing, the grand prize, the best person to ever happen to him. 

You ground down on his legs in rhythmic motions, Bucky could feel the heat seeping through his expensive dress pants and it made him feel even hotter. He pushed his leg higher, reveling in the sounds that came from your lips and the very knowledge he was the one providing this pleasure. There was nothing more exhilarating. 

But still, it wasn’t enough. “There are too many layers of clothes between us, dove,” his wet breath brushed against your cheek as he pulled his thigh back for you to take off your jeans. 

“You’re so right.” You grinned and then pulled them down in one swift motion only to reveal a pink pear of panties underneath. 

In an instant, his body was pressed to yours again, his lips attaching to yours like magnets - he couldn’t get enough of the taste of you. But instead of placing his leg right back to get you that delicious friction, his hand began traveling down your front until it disappeared in your underwear. 

If you were any other woman, Bucky would’ve gone down on you. He would have dropped to his knees and eaten you out because he knew it was the fastest way he’d make you come. And he took pride in the fact that the women he was with always had at least one orgasm more than him. But he didn’t do so with you. 

Why?

Because Bucky Barnes got high off of your lips, and he couldn’t possibly imagine not seeing your face, feeling your mouth shape in a silent scream when he would make you come for the first time. 

So his hand had to do for now. His fingers slipped past the thin pink cotton and over your mound to gather your slickness. He gasped when he reached your heated core. “You’re so wet for me, love. So ready.” He pecked the corner of your lips. “So perfect.”

“Yes!” You whined and pressed your pussy into his touch. Bucky immediately started to trace circles on your clit. He took his time to find the motions with which your breath staggered, or your fists clenched in his shirt. With every whimper, every stroke of his hand, he felt his dick strain his pants a little more - the aching exciting him for when he could finally sink into you. 

“Shit, don’t stop. I’m so close.”

“I don’t plan on ever stopping.” He growled into your mouth, his hand movements becoming more frantic, the wet noises filling your apartment. Frankly, Bucky didn’t believe he could ever stop giving you pleasure and having you writhe in his arms with deep sighs. Not until he knew how you sounded cumming on his hand, on his face, on his dick, on the sofa, on the bed, and every other surface he could possibly imagine. Your body was like ecstasy.

Your walls began to clench around his fingers, every drag becoming harder as he imagined his cock being squeezed by you instead. “There you go, Baby. That’s it.”

“OH MY GOD!” You screamed as your hand pulled on his hair, your body growing rigid with pleasure and Bucky kissed every curse word from your lips. 

After a minute, he slowly pulled his hand back, the other caressing the skin on your cheek. “Are you okay?” He whispered, his eyes boring into yours in genuine concern. 

“Are you kidding? I’m more than okay. That was incredible.” Bucky couldn’t help the small chuckle from leaving his lips at your praise. 

“You look really fucking pretty when you come.”

“I’m glad. Because I want you to make me do it again.” You kissed his cheek. “And again.” And then you gently stroked his cock through his pants. “And again.”

And the second you said that Bucky pulled you onto the floor with him. He took his time removing your clothes, kissed the trial of your bra strap all the way down your shoulder, licked and bit at your hips all the way down to your ankles where he finally pulled off your underwear and pressed his lips to the soft skin of your leg. And when you were fully naked, he paused. Bucky’s eyes roamed your body, taking in every divot, every mark and curve of yours.

He sat back on his haunches, his head getting dizzy when the butterflies took over. “God, you’re so beautiful,” Bucky softly wheezed, his hand slowly stroking your leg as you lay spread out in front of him. 

“Come here.” You gestured with your arms open, welcoming him in your embrace with a wide smile. Bucky supported his weight with his arms on either side of your head and let your hands bury in his hair. He closed his eyes letting the warmth of your touch overtake him. Your thumbs stroked over his brows before you whispered: “Look at me.”

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry I doubted you. I feel the appreciation in the way you talk to me and touch me. It was unfair of me to assume you are your reputation.”

“No, it’s okay. It’s not like I made it easy for you to believe me.”

You chuckled and pressed a kiss to his lips. “Well, I do now.” Your eyes locked with his and a new fire lit within them. 

“Good.” He smirked and then rolled you over so that you were straddling his waist. The cool wooden floor hit his bare back as you had bunched his shirt up on the way, now pulling it over his head and revealing your satisfied stare when your hands traced over his abs.

You shook your head and released a breath. “Shame on me for refusing this for so long.” Your fingers passed his happy trail and began working on his belt. Bucky’s thumbs stroked your thighs as he watched you undress him, the tent in his pants ever so present and growing with every brush of your fingers. 

“Don’t worry, dove. We have all the time in the world to make up for it.” When his pants were off he pulled you forward again, kissing you ferociously. “‘Cause I’m not planning on leaving.”

You smirked and ground down on his cock, interrupting his speech and ripping a guttural sound from his chest. 

He had been holding back. Ever since you'd dragged him into that shelter, he had not touched a woman, because you had him hooked the second you had taken his hand on the way. And now he had to bite his tongue to keep himself from coming in his boxers like a school boy. 

“Are you getting nervous, Bucky?” You grinned and moved again to tease him a little more.

“Can you blame me?” He clenched his jaw when you rocked forward again, his hand stilling your hips with a near-bruising grip. “I’ve wanted you ever since I stepped foot in your shop.”

“You did?” Your head cocked to the side, surprise washing over your face and his dick twitched making Bucky’s cheeks heat up. 

“Yes...” He confessed only to be attacked with your kisses again. He groaned and bucked his hips up until you were a moaning mess on top of him. His hands reached around you, settling on your ass and giving it a small clap. 

“Hand me my walled, baby. It’s in my pants.”

“Why?”

“We need a condom if you don’t want to keep dry-humping me.” He smirked, knowing, feeling there was nothing dry about this anymore. Your arousal was already drenching his boxers. The slick pushing him close to losing it. 

“It’s okay. We don’t have to, I have an IUD.” 

“As much as I want to, we should be safe...” Bucky swallowed and averted his eyes in regret. “Have to get tested again.”

“Oh, ok.” You were disappointed, he could tell. And Bucky was too. It was the first time he ever regretted all his one-night stands because he would kill to fuck you raw and feel all of you. And as hazy as your body made him, he could not ignore the fact that he did have several different sex partners before. It would have to wait a few weeks. And when he would come back clean, he would keep you in the bedroom for a week straight.

You must have noticed his misery because you leaned forward and kissed his cheek. Then you scooched back and retrieved the condom from his wallet. Bucky held his breath when your fingers hooked into his waistband. And when you pulled them down, his cock stood proud and thick with precum already pearling from his tip. 

He reached for the shiny packet in your hand but you pulled your arm up, your eyes stuck on his cock. “Let me.”

“Okay,” he breathed out as he watched you rip the packet. His shaft twitched when your careful hands rolled the condom over him, another bead of precum dripping into the condom and before he could collect himself, you rubbed your pussy all over him, coating him in your arousal. 

Bucky’s hands turned into fists at your sides as he watched you finally sink down on him - inch by inch, your heat welcomed him, his body sparking with pleasure all over. You moaned in unison when he was fully seated inside you, his cock being hugged tightly in your warmth - he’d barely held it together then. 

You planted your hands on his abdomen and rocked forward, sending the both of you reeling. It took a second for Bucky to collect himself. His eyes closed and his nose huffing, he reminded himself of what he had promised you and what he wanted his first time with you to be. When he opened his eyes again, his hands moved over your body with determination. One setting over your breast, rolling your nipple between his fingers, the other began tracing tight circles on your clit. 

Your head fell back, a vision of ecstasy and pleasure unfolding before him when he sent you over the edge a second time. He slowed your hips on his and rubbed your pussy with his thumb. He needed you to come again. And then again, and he had to hold out for that long. But the way your chest heaved, the light sheen of sweat forming on your skin, made his plan more than difficult. 

It took all of Bucky’s willpower to pull you off his cock and push you to his legs. He sat up and kissed up your neck until he reached your lips. “What are you doing?”

“Giving you what you asked for.” He mumbled against your skin and then licked over your nipple, the other being caressed by his fingers. His free hand found its place right between your legs again and when you moaned lowly, he slipped two fingers inside you. 

Your pussy was squelching, the lewd sound traveling across the living room as Bucky worked you towards another release. You were already squirming in his hands again. Your fists pulled at his roots, sending a shiver straight to his cock when you leaned his head back. “You’re amazing.” Your breath was hot, fanning over his lips only to be replaced by them again. His tongue slipped inside and mimicking the movement of his fingers in your pussy. 

“Right back at ya, dove. I can't wait to be inside you again.”

“Then what are you waiting for?”

“For you to come again.” He bit your lip and sped up his fingers already feeling you squeeze him tightly. “So you’re satiated when I come deep inside you, feeling you squeeze me with that perfect pussy of yours until you see stars.”

“Shitshitshit. I’m coming!” A series of curses flew past him when you pulsed around his fingers, gushing all over his hand and lap until he finished rocking you through your third orgasm. 

“Fuck,” Bucky licked your juices off his fingers and his eyes rolled back into his head. 

“I don’t think I have another in me, Bucky.”

“Don’t worry, love. I got you.” And with that he hooked your legs around his waist, falling forward until you were with your back to the floor, Bucky hovering over you and aligning his length with your entrance. 

He couldn’t wait anymore, in one swift motion, Bucky fully bottomed out until his balls hit your ass. And when he was confident you were comfortable, he set a relentless pace. He had been on the edge this entire time. You had almost made him come just having him watch you let go. But there was nothing like the feeling of your pussy hugging him tightly, your body writhing beneath his, eyes squeezed shut in pleasure and nails raking down his back. 

“You feel so good,” he grunted and you just moaned in response.

“Look at me, please.” His hand turned your face. “I need to see you.” 

Bucky snapped his hips into yours even faster, your walls already clenching tightly around him and he threatened to burst. Your eyes opened and fell to his and Bucky couldn’t stop his orgasm from ripping through him anymore. His strokes stuttered, his balls tightened, but he held eye contact with you, searching your hand behind his back to lock your fingers with his. 

The white pleasure exploded within him, elevated by your own peak hitting with full force. He kissed you then, feeling like he was somewhere between heaven and your living room floor. His mind was consumed by you, his body tingling in aftershocks as he rocked you through your highs. 

His damp chest fell into yours when you came down. He rolled on his back, taking you with him, pressed deeply into his body, his cock still buried inside you. Bucky’s chest was heaving, the last remnants of pleasure sparkling in his nerves. He kissed your hand and cuddled you closer. 

This was what he was made for. To be with you, to be consumed by your affection and warmth. 

He smoothed over your head and felt your lashes flutter on his skin. His heart was blooming with contentment - all the fear he’d felt to commit was miles away, lost somewhere between the Ironbar and your doorstep. There was nothing he was more sure of. 

“Let me do this right. Let me take you out.” He whispered into your hair with a smile, trying to remember a time he’d ever been this happy. 

You snorted as your hand gently stroked over his chest. “Bucky, you’re literally ballsdeep inside of me right now.”

Bucky chuckled as well, his hand rubbed down your bare back in a soothing motion when he kissed your head. “Nothing like a convincing argument, huh.”

🫵 You cant get enough of this character? Go check out the chatbot I made for him! This way you can explore different endlings, plotlines, or just enjoy his company for a while longer 💕

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Woooow, you've made it this far! Thank you so much 💕 If you have some time to spare, I would reaaaally appreciate some feedback from you. A comment or a reblog can help so much to reach more people and improve writing. Talk to you soon ~Meg 💞

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˚ · . 𝓲𝓷 𝔀𝓱𝓲𝓬𝓱… you go out with your best friend in an attempt to forget about your ex, but he finds his way back into your life

˚ · . 𝔀𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼… my first fic😬; bathroom sex; p in v; unprotected; language; f!ngering; mentions of drinking; pet names

“𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙩𝙧𝙮 𝙩𝙤 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙞 𝙖𝙢, 𝙞’𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚 𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙧𝙚𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙖𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣”

“Are you just gonna mope around forever? You’ve gotta forget about him eventually. You broke up with him for a reason.” my best friend, Madi, said while she put on her new lip combo for the 5th time in the last 15 minutes.

“I just can’t… I regret breaking up with him if I’m being honest.” I reply, hiding myself in his my hoodie.

Matt and I dated for 8 months, almost 9. Almost as long as a whole pregnancy. But I threw it away. I threw it away cause you were pissed that he “went out too much”. Of course he goes out, we’re young, why was I mad? Why did I break up with him?

“Oh please, you need to forget about him. Do you not remember how he would always brush you off for his friends, or even ditch you to hangout with other people?”

Madi scoffs and repeats herself,

“You need to forget about him. We should go out to the club !!”

“The club? I don’t know. I don’t think I even have anything good to wear…”

“I have the perfect thing for you, don’t even worry.”

She rushes over to her closet, skimming through her outfits and occasionally throwing things off to the side. A few moments later, she grins and turns to face me, holding up a lacy red dress.

“Isn’t it perfect? And it’ll show off your boobs.”

Madi giggles like a little kid and sets it down on the bed beside me.

Maybe she’s right. I did break up with him, why am I still so hung up on him? Maybe I do need to forget about Matt. The least I can do is try.

“Soooo you gonna wear it or what??”

I sigh and look back and forth between her and the dress, chewing on my bottom lip lightly while I think.

“Okay fine I guess I will.”

“Yay!! We’ll have so much fun!”

She does a little clap and a goofy smile while I get up from the bed and pick up the dress. Madi walks over to her vanity and sits down in front of it, fixing her concealer.

“You know where the bathroom is, I’m redoing my make up. We gotta find some men to fuck!”

“Yeah okay I don’t know about all that” I laugh a bit while walking to Madi’s bathroom. She calls out, “I’m definitely finding someone!”

As we made our way into the club, it was already packed. Red lights shined down on us, and music was blaring so loudly that it would definitely leave my ears ringing for days.

“Come on we should get a drink!” Madi yelled over the music.

“Yeah I definitely need to not be sober for this”

I followed her to the bar, my hand loosely holding hers so we don’t get separated from each other in the crowd. She accidentally bumps into someone, getting their drink down the side of her dress.

“Oh what the fuck! You go to the bar, I’m washing this off in the bathroom!”

Before I even get the chance to say anything, she’s running towards the bathroom. I make my way towards the bar, sitting down at an empty seat.

So far, this has not been a pleasant experience. But it’s definitely getting my mind off of him.

Suddenly, a large hand holds onto my shoulder. I turn my head around quickly and my heart drops.

Matt.

“What the hell…” I mutter under my breath and look up to meet his gaze.

“What? Not even a hello?” He flashes a side smirk and I can already feel myself getting wet. He sits down on the bar stool besides mine and holds eye contact.

“Just… you were the last person I was expecting to see tonight.”

I stare into his icy blue eyes, subconsciously clenching my thighs together.

“Didn’t know you were the clubbing type.” He tilts his head to the side slightly.

“I’m only here because of Madi.”

“I don’t see her. Where’s she at? And she really dragged you here? Why?”

“Oh she just.. she got some drink spilled on her dress…and she got me to come because…um, she said I needed to ‘forget about you’.” my voice gets quieter and I look away from him as my cheeks turn a light shade of pink.

“Forget about me? That’s absurd. You’re my girl.”

I can feel my thong getting soaked and my face flushes a deep red.

“You can’t just say things like that…” I keep my gaze away from his, determined to not make eye contact.

“Why? Does it get you flustered? I see the way you’re squeezing your thighs together.”

He suddenly grabs my chin and turns my head to face him.

“Look at me when I talk to you.”

“Yeah it makes me flustered. I’m supposed to be forgetting about you, not talking with you.”

“You wanna forget? Let me remind you.”

He places a hand on my upper thigh, his rings chilling my skin slightly. I look down at his hand, the only thought going through my mind is how his fingers would feel curled inside me.

“I’m pretty sure they have a family bathroom in this place.”

My eyes immediately flick up to his at his bold comment.

“Uh yeah I think so…”

“Let me remind you, hm?”

“Yeah let’s go.”

I almost jump out of my seat. He gets up, placing a hand on my lower back, and leads us towards the bathrooms.

He pushes the door of the family bathroom open, letting me walk inside first before swiftly shutting and locking the door. I back myself up against the counter and he follows, standing infront of me. He places his hand on the edge of the counter beside me and uses the other to play with the strap of my dress.

“Can I take this off?”

I nod and get more flustered, on the verge of begging for his touch. He slips down my dress, letting it to fall to the floor as he puts his hands on the back of my thighs, lifting me up and placing me down on the cold counter.

“You look so pretty like this.” Matt says while running his middle and index finger across my still clothed clit and entrance. I moan softly at the contact.

“So wet for me too…” He moves his hands up to the edge of my thong as I whine at the loss of contact.

“Can I take this off too baby?”

“Y-yeah. You can..”

As soon as those words leave my mouth, he’s yanks my thong down and discards it on the floor. He brings his fingers back up to my clit and moves them in small, teasing circles.

“Oh fuck… don’t tease me Matt.” He doesn’t say anything, instead shutting me up by kissing me and pushing his fingers into my cunt easily.

He pumps his fingers in and out quickly. I moan out loudly as he starts leaving red marks at the base of my neck, causing him to place his free hand over my mouth.

“Quiet. You don’t want anyone hearing, do you?”

“No…” My response is a little muffled, considering his hand is over my mouth, and he only speeds up his pace. That familiar knot in my stomach starts to form. My back starts to arch, my walls clenching around his fingers.

“You close baby?” He asks, still pumping his fingers into me madly, starting to curl them to hit that sensitive spot.

The only thing I can do is nod as I lean my head back in pleasure.

“Use your words.”

“Yes- fuck!” I yell out as I cum hard on his fingers, and he keeps going while I come down from my high.

“You did so good f’me.” He pulls his fingers out and licks them clean.

“Holy shit…” I start to catch my breath for only a few moments before he commands me again.

“Get up and turn around.” Immediately I listen, getting off the counter and turning around so my back is pressed against his chest. He runs his hand from the bottom of my spine to my neck, bending me over the counter. I shiver at the feeling.

I watch in the mirror as he quickly undos his belt buckle and shoves down his baggy jeans and navy blue boxers. My lipstick is smudged and there’s make up running down my face. Already looking fucked out but we haven’t actually fucked yet.

He strokes himself a few times before pushing his tip up to my entrance. He grabs my hands and pins them behind my back before pushing his entire length in, his tip kissing my cervix. I whine at the stretch, but the pain quickly turns to pleasure.

“So fuckin’ tight…” He groans as he pulls almost all the way out before slamming back into me. Feels like I could cum again right then.

He continues fucking me roughly and I let my head fall forward as I let out another loud moan. Matt grabs a fistful of my hair and yanks my head up so I can see him through the mirror.

“You’re gonna watch.” All I can do is nod at his command as I feel that knot in my stomach get tighter.

“Matt.. I’m gonna cum!” I look into his eyes and can feel my walls clench around him again. He drops my hair and brings his hand down to my clit, rubbing small tight circles.

“Come f’me. Come on my cock.”

The knot in my stomach snaps, and I let out a loud pornographic moan as I cum for the second time. He thrusts a few more times before pulling out and stroking himself. His cum lands on my back as he throws his head back.

The only sounds filling the bathroom are heavy breathing. He grabs a wad of toilet paper, using it to clean off my back.

“Let me clean you up…” He bends down and places his hands on my ass as he starts licking at my clit and entrance. I whine a bit as I’m still sensitive, but he gets up and licks his lips after a few moments.

“That definitely did not help me forgot you.” I say while getting up and sliding my thong back up.

“Maybe you should try to forget me more often so we can do that again.”

We get our clothes back on and sneak out the bathroom together, but Madi is practically 2 feet away from the bathrooms. She glances over, seeing me and Matt leaving, and immediately walks over to me.

“When I said we need to find some men to fuck I didn’t mean your ex!”

˚ · . 𝓪/𝓷… my first fic and attempt at smut so sorry if it sucks 🤗…also rushed that ending whoops

[bigtreefest]

A What in Church?

Pairing: Ransom Drysdale x reader (can be read as a continuation of Meet The Parents or alone)

Summary: Ransom comes with you and your family to church…and then comes with you at church 🥴 (I’m sorry, but I had to)

Word count: 2,728

Content/warnings: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI, SMUT, near-fingering, p in v unprotected sex (pls, for the love of all that is holy, wrap it up), sex in front of a mirror, sex in a church😬, creampie, established relationship, swears, Ran is a sneaky li’l gaslighter but not towards you, lying in Church?, kissing, pet name usage, choking on one’s own saliva, implied female reader, li’l belly bulge

A/N: I hope God forgives me for thinking this up during church…

This is for the Cum Together: A Community Revival Extravaganza set up by @labella420 and @stargazingfangirl18 with the prompts of characters cum together at the same time and praise.

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

Main Masterlist

It was early Sunday morning when you dragged Ransom out of bed.

“Hugh Ransom Drysdale, come on. You have to get up. We’re already running late and I’m not dealing with disapproving looks from my parents for punctuality. It’s already bad enough every time the church ladies give me a side eye when I show up.”

He sighed as he rolled over in his high thread count sheets, the sunlight now hitting his face causing him to squint. He looked at you through one open eye as he made a light scowl.

“Sweetheart, come back to bed. It’s too early. I promise I’ll make it worth it.” A sly smirk crept onto his face as he reached out and pulled your hips closer to the bed.

You put a hand on his forehead, trying your best and failing to push him away. “Ransom, no. The only reason I stayed over was to make sure we got there on time. My parents think you’re picking me up right now and neither of us are even showered. If you get up now, maybe I’ll let you join me. Then we can get going.”

His arms snaked from your hips and around to give your ass a squeeze. “Hm….deal.” He rasped out in his groggy voice before shifting to get up.

“Whose idea was it to join your family at the 8am service of church this week, anyway?” Ransom threw the covers off the side of the bed in a mini tantrum before rising on his knees on the mattress to be face-to-face with you. You ran your fingers through his hair, slightly smoothing out the bed head before giving him a peck.

“Yours, baby. That’s what you get for trying to impress my mom.”

You fixed your makeup in the mirror of Ransom’s Beamer and smoothed down your baby blue linen dress after Ransom parked in the church parking lot. You turned to look at him as you straightened the collar of his shirt that peeked over his sweater.

“You look absolutely dapper. The church ladies are gonna love you. Probably enough for them to keep their judgy eyes off me. Now let’s just hope they don’t start asking my mom about a wedding date.” You grumbled the last part as you brushed imaginary dust off his shoulders before leaning back towards your own seat again and placing your hand on the door handle.

Ransom didn’t move a muscle as he sat there, leaning over the center console, with a look as deep at the ocean. That was weird. You’d expected him to have his cocky game face on, which he did, but his eyes showed something different.

“What? Is something wrong? Do I not look okay? Are you regretting agreeing to come along today?”

He sighed and shook his head before holding out his hand for yours. “No, you look heavenly. I am regretting sleeping in because if I wouldn’t have, maybe you would’ve actually let me touch you in the shower. I thought a shower with you meant with you, but you tricked me, you minx.”

You softly smiled at the beginning of his statement, placing your hand in his. As he kept going, you rolled your eyes before playfully shoving his shoulder. “Oh please. You and I both know you wouldn’t have gotten up for anything else. And if I would’ve let you touch me, we’d still be at your place.”

He shrugged before pulling you closer for a final kiss before heading in. It was the kind that left you breathless and speechless, and a little dizzy when he pulled away, but that could have been due to skipping breakfast, too. Your eyes were still closed when he spoke against your lips. “Don’t think you’re getting away with this that easily, though. Now stay here while I get your door. Gotta make sure the church ladies see me treating you well.”

Your jaw dropped as he gave you a smirk, fire rising in his gaze as he slipped out of the driver’s side and over to yours.

Ransom held your hand as he walked into the church, sliding into a pew near the back where your family had saved the two of you a seat. It was just in time for the service to begin. You were simultaneously filled with relief for not being late, but also anxiousness. You knew that when he held that look in his eye, Ransom was up to no good.

If someone had asked you what you’d gathered from the sermon so far, your answer would be ‘jack shit.’ You were too focused on Ransom, and the way his hand was creeping up your leg as he stared straight ahead. He looked enthralled by whatever the preacher was dragging on and on about, but you knew better from the way his lips curled just slightly at the corners and his ringed pinky finger was sliding under the hem of your dress. The cool metal gave you chills. Your breath hitched, just as you were salivating, imagining what Ransom could possibly have in store for you. Unfortunately, that didn’t make for a good combination, as you choked on your own saliva.

You tried your hardest to hold in your coughs, eyes watering, until you couldn’t take it anymore. They burst out of you and the sound of your coughs, one after another, echoed through the nearly silent room as you scrambled to get up and into the hallway. Ransom shot your parents a sympathetic look before wordlessly gesturing that he was going to check up on you. They nodded in response, glad you had found someone so caring and responsible.

You burst through the doors at the back of the room with Ransom hot on your heels. You fast walked into the family restroom and Ransom slipped in behind you. He locked the door and made his way to your hunched over form, your arms bracing you against the sink as you continued coughing and heaving, trying to catch your breath. Ransom rubbed your back in soothing circles until you took a final gasp for air and looked up at his reflection in the mirror with a scowl.

“You did this. This is your fault, Mr. Handsy.” It came out with the slightest rasp. Ransom’s face morphed from slight concern into suggestion. Now that he had made sure you were okay, he was more than happy to have you exactly where he wanted you all along: alone.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m not the one out there snorting my spit. I could probably successfully swallow, unlike you.” He knew exactly what he was doing. He was trying to rile you up so you’d give in to him now since you didn’t earlier this morning. You’d never outwardly crumble that easily, though. Where was the fun in that?

“First off, you should be the one to know I’m great at swallowing. And secondly, if you believe you did nothing wrong, I think we should find you a neurologist for those wandering hands. Maybe the rings are causing nerve damage and cutting off the feeling in your fingertips.” Ransom couldn’t help but let out a small chortle at that. Good one, babe. But he knew what could push you a little farther. He knew how much you really did love the way his hands wandered, even if you’d say otherwise. He could tell right now even, as he shifted to stand behind you, soft fingertips tracing up the front of your thighs and under your flowy dress. His hand was in between your thighs, creeping dangerously close to your cotton panties. He used his grip to pull you back against him, eyes never leaving yours in the mirror.

“Oh honey, I don’t have to be able to feel my fingers to know how good they make you feel.” He ran his fingers over the dampening fabric as your breath hitched. Finally.

His grin grew wide as he slipped his pinky finger under the gusset of your panties and pulled it to the side, exposing your glistening folds to the cool air.

You hissed at the sensation as Ransom began running a finger through your wetness. If you were anywhere else but a church bathroom, he would have worked to pull even louder sounds from you than the tiny breaths and moans you were already making, but that’s not something that could be afforded right now. As his one hand continued to tease your entrance, the other moved to cover your mouth.

“Quiet, Sweetheart. You make a noise and I stop. Don’t want anyone to find out what’s going on in here.” You nodded in acknowledgment and Ransom was satisfied with that response, kissing your temple that was collecting a thin shimmer from sweat already. Just as he was about to dip a finger in, though, the two of you heard music start. That meant service was almost over. They would play a few songs, and then everyone would rush out the doors, making it impossible for the two of you to leave the bathroom undetected and unsuspected of what was going on right now.

Ransom didn’t waste a second, though, pulling his hands off you to unzip his slacks and pull them down just low enough. His eyes locked in on yours in the mirror again, deep blue irises thin around lust and mischief-blown pupils.

“Sorry, sweetie. Don’t have time to prepare you. But you can handle that, right?” You didn’t have a chance to reply this time, as his hand found it’s place over your mouth again at the same time he fully sheathed himself within you.

The little squeak you made into Ransom’s hand when you were trying to hold back was music to his ears. Oooo, he liked that. He was gonna make sure to do whatever he could in the future so you’d make it again, but he didn’t have the time for it right now.

His hand that wasn’t over your mouth snaked to your tummy from where it was gripping your hip. Ransom could just barely feel the bulge pushing against your softness with each thrust and it drove him wild, as he sped up his thrusts and babbled into your ear.

“Yeah you can. You can take it. Look at you. Taking this so well. Being so good for me. I’d say you were an angel if we weren’t fucking like two whores in church right now.”

His vulgar words always did something to you, causing your eyes to roll back and your pussy to clench. That was Ransom’s favorite, especially when he found it out that his sharp tongue was something you actually enjoyed and rewarded him for, instead of punished. Despite his hand on your mouth, you were still working hard to keep yourself quiet, only letting out a low moan in response.

“Fuck, so good. So, gah-tight. You’re so perfect. I’m gonna take my hand off, okay? You gotta keep it down and I promise I’ll make you feel good.” You gripped harder against the sink as Ransom removed his hand, using it to hike your leg up on the edge of the counter, his hand that was previously on your stomach moving to rub your clit.

You gasped for air, before moving your own hand to your mouth. If you were at home, moans and curses would’ve been profusely spilling out of your mouth with how near your were to the tipping point. Ransom’s grunts in your ear we’re pulling you even closer to the edge when he licked your neck, the sweet taste of your perfume mixed with salty sweat hitting his tongue, and the debauchery of the gesture tossing you over the edge of your orgasm. Your knee gave out as you came, Ransom’s strong arms holding you up against the sink as you felt him swell and release in you at the same time, still rubbing your clit and shallowly thrusting for both of you to come down from your highs.

“That’s it. That’s it, sweetheart.” His breath was hot against your neck, but you were both pulled out of the post-orgasmic bliss by the sound of the music changing. The last song of service was playing and within a few minutes, everyone would be emerging into the hall.

Ransom pulled out of you faster than he had before, both of you moaning with oversensitivity and the abruptness of the action. You gained composure on your jelly legs before pulling your panties back into place and doing your best to fix your makeup in the mirror. Luckily, the smudges could be attributed to your coughing fit earlier, but Ransom’s rogue hairs that had flown forward and stuck to his forehead couldn’t. You quickly pushed them back into a decent position and straightened his collar before rushing into the hallway and taking a seat at an old pew that was next to a table with water bottles and cookies on it, set out for the social hour that always happened after service. Ransom grabbed a bottle and quickly chugged it down halfway, handing it to you just as the last song was ending.

“Here, hunch forward like you’re still recovering. And take this.” He was too good at convincing people of the scenes they had walked into. But how could you complain when it had gotten you out of trouble with the cops more times than you could count? Including after the two of you had been parked somewhere a little too long having car sex, or when he had driven just a little too recklessly while fingering you in the passenger seat. He always knew exactly how to manipulate the scene in his favor, convincing others to not believe their own eyes, but the stories he presented them instead. But he didn’t do it to you, never to you. He learned that the hard way, it’s better to be honest and do it with you. You were his teammate, who better to use his skills for than the one he loved? Bring it up though, and he’d deny it.

So you and Ransom sat there, your elbows on your knees and him rubbing circles on your back with his large, warm palm. Sure, it was performative, but it was also extremely comforting and reassuring, especially with the way he just rocked your world in the bathroom.

The church-goers began to file out of the double doors and into the hall. You looked up through your eyelashes to be greeted by your parents. They looked at you with confusion and a hint of concern when your dad crouched in front of you and your mom sat next to Ransom.

“Everything alright?” Your dad looked up into your eyes and you managed a nod, taking a sip from the water bottle and clearing your throat.

“Yeah, sorry about that. Got into a coughing fit and couldn’t shake it. Much better now.”

Ransom heard the clarity with which you spoke. If he really wanted to be convincing, he should’ve had you suck him off. There wasn’t really the time for that, though. As much as he loved watching your lips wrapped around him, he came way faster inside you, and how could he allow for the evidence of scuffs on your knees when you were wearing such a pretty dress? Maybe next time, when you were in jeans.

Ransom was pulled out of his thoughts when your mom and dad spoke, thanking him for checking up on you.

“Oh no problem, don’t worry, I took good care of your girl. I always will.”

They smiled, and must’ve believed the scene in front of them, as the topic swiftly changed to what they wanted for brunch plans. Ransom met your gaze, giving a quick wink for only you to see before kissing the top of your head and giving his input to the conversation.

That was the last you saw of him for half an hour, though, as the church ladies descended, squeezing themselves between the two of you, oohing and ahhhing over your sly boyfriend. Every now and then, as they’d ask him a tidal wave of questions, his eyes would seek you, full of fire, secrecy, and love, paired with that signature smirk on his face.

Bonus A/N: I think something that this extravaganza has taught me is that I have a thing for mirrors….and that scares me. It’s so hot in fics, and sure, every time I walk past a mirror in real life, I’ve been told I stop, but I wasn’t aware of what a dangerous combination that made until now. Lord save me, but he’s probably too angry at me now bc I wrote this.

[djarins-cyare]

WIP Weekend

In my last WIP post, I mentioned I was 18k words into my Secret Relationship fic for the Roll-A-Trope Writing Challenge, and it had turned into something much longer than I intended. Sooo, yeah, um… it’s now reached ~40k words!

I’d planned to start posting it next weekend, but my firm got audited so I lost a couple of weeks due to working overtime, and I still have three chapters left to write. So I think it’s gonna be a Christmas release now. Sorry for the wait.

But over the last few weeks, I’ve been tagged in WIP posts by @burntheedges, @papurgaatika, @almostfoxglove, @djarinmuse, and @the-mandawhor1an (thank you, my lovelies! 💚), and with my excuses comes another snippet to tide you over until I can release it…

Please check out my last two WIP posts for additional snippets from earlier in the fic, here and here.

I’m switching it up and giving you one from Din’s POV today; the context is that she’s trying to convince him to come to a show the following night (despite Uncle Karga’s vehement disapproval of them being anywhere near each other)…

Her focus drops to her efforts on his dick as she skilfully adjusts her angle without missing a stroke, but he nudges her chin with his thumb. “Look at me, senaar’ika,” he commands through heavy breaths. When he has her attention again, he breathes, “Tion’jor neliser ni nevore gar?” Her eyes shimmer like starlight whenever he speaks Mando’a to her – like she loves to hear it, even though she doesn’t understand it. It’s why he persists in speaking to her in an almost dead language. Now, though, she answers him as if she knows exactly what he just asked. “Please come, Mando.” She could be talking about right now or tomorrow night, but they’re both foregone conclusions. “Yes, fuck,” he gasps, his mouth spilling his agreement about ten seconds before his cock is due to spill his seed. The heat gathering low in his belly flares lower to engulf his balls, and the inferno of his orgasm brightens as it builds. She stokes him for all he’s worth, soft hand on silken skin, eyes still sparkling like the fuse that sizzles inside him… …and it magnifies and spreads, so fiercely thrilling that the alley falls away, and it’s just him and his senaar’ika and the silent symphony of pleasure she’s conducting… …but in an instant, a door swishes, a footstep sounds, and Din is tearing her hand from his pants, drawing his blaster and moving his body to shield hers. The adrenaline from his impending climax converts into combat readiness, but the low growl that erupts through his vocoder is equal parts anger and anguish. “You two out here?” Yerma’s rich and golden tones dissolve his tension, leaving him with the sullen agony of an orgasm snatched away. The ache in his balls, the sting in his pride, and the regret in his heart all battle for top ranking in his pantheon of displeasure. “What’s up?” his alleyway companion asks with enviable poise, stepping past him and around the stack of crates to stop Yerma from coming any closer. He takes the cue to hastily rearrange his underwear and zip up his pants, his erection deflating rapidly alongside his hope. This was a bad idea. As if to illustrate his thought, the Twi’lek states six concerning words. “Your uncle’s in the cafe, sweetie.”

Poor Din! 😬

Tion’jor neliser ni nevore gar? – Why can’t I say no to you?

If you don’t already know what his name for her (senaar’ika) means, I won’t spoil it because it’s vaguely plot-relevant.

If you’re interested in being tagged when I release this, please raise your hand or let me know in whatever way you prefer to communicate. You can also join my tag list if you like.

In the interests of making new friends and being sociable, I thought I should make an effort to tag more widely in WIP posts. I know that since I only write for Din and not all of you are particularly Din girlies (gn), some of you may not be interested in my fics, but I read other Pedro boy fics sometimes (Joel, mostly), and if I’ve tagged you below, it means I think you’re a fantastic writer 💚

No pressure to do a WIP post, or if you’d like to but don’t have anything to share or you’ve already posted this week, feel free to hold onto this tag for whenever’s convenient (that’s what I do 😆) or share something non-WIP related.

@ace-turned-confused @ak-vintage @alltheirdamn @alltheotps @almostempty

@alwaysmicado @ameerawrites @arcanefox207 @aurorawritestoescape @avastrasposts

@baronessvonglitter @beardedjoel @beefrobeefcal @bitchesuntitled @bluestar22x

@cas-readsandwrites @chiriwritesstuff @chronically-ghosted @clawdee @covetyou

@din-cognito @draculasfavoritewife @firstofficerwiggles @guiltyasdave @hapan-in-exile

@itsokbbygrl @javierpena-inatacvest @jeewrites @jennaispunk @joelstummy

@justagalwhowrites @luxurychristmaspudding @mermaidgirl30 @milla-frenchy @moeswriting

@mothandpidgeon @mrsmando @murder-wife @novemberrain-writes @orcasoul

@ozarkthedog @pedgito @pedrospatch @perotovar @quinnnfabrgay-writes

@sawymredfox @schnarfer @soft-persephone @sweetpascal @thischarmingmandalorian

I’m also tagging my regular tag list since this is a snippet of an upcoming fic and a posting schedule update. Thank you all for your support 💚

@chiyo13 @harriedandharassed @leithatnight @lilac-boo @lucienofthelakes

@pigeonmama @punkygreeny @syd-djarin @wrathkitty

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️Reveling in Richonne - TOWL

#26: The Crazy (1.03)

gif cred: @nerd4music

So there was no doubt in my mind what I’d label the final post of episode 3. It had to be called ‘The Crazy’ because…Pearl lost her damn mind aiming a gun at Michonne. Like is she insane? 🤨

Lol, no but for real this is called ‘The Crazy’ because my sweet sweet Richonne are a couple that can always match each other's shine, match each other's freak, and especially match each other's crazy.

And their crazy was on full display in the final moments of this thrill of an episode 👌🏽...

But first, we do actually have to talk about Pearl being crazy enough to consider taking out Michonne in cold blood. 😑

After Richonne miraculously doesn’t get caught hungrily making out behind a thin tree they return to take down walkers like only Richonne can. We love to see it. 😊 But Pearl apparently hates to see it. 😬

gif cred: @coolpartytimefan

She watches as Rick and Michonne kill these walkers and starts really paying attention to Michonne taking out walkers and being the A Pearl pretends to be.

Pearl appears consumed with what I interpreted as a feeling of being threatened by Michonne, not because Pearl wants Rick, but rather because Michonne is a natural leader who clearly has an influence on people like Sergeant Major Grimes and she’s terrified that somehow Michonne being a clear A will have major ramifications on herself - both as a solider who argued for her and personally considering Dana’s effect on Pearl’s one family member Rick.

So Pearl raises her gun at Michonne and even starts to pull the trigger which was Pearl's certified death sentence. Seeing this, I was like welp this scene is a spoiler now lol. I knew Pearl wasn't gonna make it out of TOWL alive because again, anyone who threatens Michonne swiftly ends up in the afterlife.

gif cred: @coolpartytimefan

Luckily, Rick notices Pearl aiming a gun at his wife and none of what Pearl thinks she’s about to do is ever happening on Rick’s watch so without question he grabs a walker and gets in front of her gun to shield Michonne. How sweet. 🥰

gif cred: @coolpartytimefan

Rick reminds Pearl of why they’re out here when he yells they have 10 delts left and Pearl snaps back to reality to finish the job. I'll say it over an over again - I love that Rick takes his role as Michonne’s protector so seriously. He never hesitates to literally put his life on the line for her. 

gif cred: @coolpartytimefan

So then it’s nighttime as the soldiers are packing up and Rick and Michonne share a quick little look before he walks in the opposite direction as Pearl approaches to reprimand him.

Pearl says, “She broke protocol which made you break protocol” And Pearl, babe, he’d do it again. Cuz that 'she' Pearl's talking about is Rick's longtime leader so of course he followed Michonne and broke protocol with her.

Also, I was like Pearl the task wasn’t gonna get done if they followed your lead so...🤷🏽‍♀️. Rick responds by saying, “She needed help. You needed help.” And Pearl most certainly did. She seems to have forgotten that.

Pearl is still ticked off as she says there needs to be order and again emphasizes, “She went rogue and you followed, how many others are gonna do that?” I admit I liked seeing someone be so shook over the influence Michonne has lol. 🤭

gif cred: @coolpartytimefan

Pearl says, “I trusted her, I put my neck out for her. For you. I regret it.” I like how Rick replies by saying, “Don’t.” cuz he’s like 'you have regrets? well, how about don't have regrets' lol.

Then Rick, who has had to be an actor all episode with Pearl, is ready to dish out more lies to protect Michonne when he says, “That’s why I did what I did. Listen, maybe it was too early for her. I’ll send her back, give her more time at the Harvest Point.”

Pearl is done defending Dana as she sternly says, “Yeah, for now. We need to take care of this - us.” And hearing that made me feel like Pearl in the first episode of TOWL cuz I was looking at her like “uh, uh don’t say ‘us’, Thorne.” Cuz they’re not an ‘us’, plain and simple.

Pearl is in her hater energy telling Rick to take Michonne back cuz she doesn’t want to see her again. And Pearl, that's because you know deep down if Michonne does show you up again...

Pearl also says she’ll give Rick a pass this time since he did help majorly. Then Pearl reveals that Beale wants to brief Rick and that he’s moving up which is news to Rick, especially after Beale had previously said he still doesn’t know if he trusts him earlier in this ep. Pearl says, “Rick, you better understand.” before walking away. And Rick seems shaken by all this.

I think for Rick there’s this sense of one; knowing he has to get his wife out of here by any means necessary and he can’t rely on Pearl at all anymore since she’s done with Dana. And also two; for years, Rick's been told that his life’s purpose should be changing the CRM from the inside, and learning he’s moving up could present an opportunity to do so. But also getting the briefing could be something that just further enslaves him as it seems to have changed and enslaved Pearl to the CRM now, even if she doesn't view it like that.

So then, if this day wasn’t stressful enough, Rick is walking and sees the Garbage Queen walking around. 😒

Watching it back it made me laugh because Rick sees Jadis first and he has a stank face but isn’t intending to talk to her. He was just gonna walk on by with an expression like 'look what the trash brought in.' But then Jadis speaks to him saying she’s headquartered here now so she’ll be around often. Again, just more bad news for Rick. 😩

And then like I said before, Jadis will combust if she doesn’t harass somebody every two seconds so she tries it once again when she attempts flirtation and touches Rick saying, “You should come take a look at my quarters.” 🤢 I love the way Rick pulls away in absolute disgust at the mere notion of what Jadis is implying. Like he’s wholly offended by the offer and so am I.

I appreciate how Rick, like Michonne, never even considered anyone else neither sexually or romantically. It’s true to their characters to stay so loyally in love with each other even after being apart longer than they were together. Again, you don’t move on from a love like theirs.

I just know when Rick first got to the CRM he wanted to take a page from Toy Story and have Michonne’s name written on the bottom of his tattered cowboy boot just to make it clear who he belongs to lol. No other woman stood a chance at being with him, especially not that serpent Jadis.

That’s why every time Rick gets to kiss Michonne and hold her and be tenderly held by her after they reunited it makes my heart happy because he’s getting to experience and express this love with the only woman on the planet he wants to experience and express this love with.

And when Jadis comes on to Rick and he pulls away that was a ‘heifer, I’m a married man’ pull away. Like I know the direct quote from his mind was ‘Even tho I’m about to try and break things off with my wife, I’m still an eternally married man because I’m trying to get Michonne to leave me but I’m still not leaving her ever.’ 

gif cred@andy-clutterbuck

As Rick looks at Jadis with loathing in his eyes, she says, “Beautiful view of the cascades,” somehow not picking up on the fact that Rick has gone several years without his wife and still never once looked her way.

And then Jadis just casually looks right over at Michonne almost tickled by this whole situation as she says, “She hasn’t seen me.” The audacity of this woman to be coming on to Rick at all, but especially when she knows his wife was right there. Jadis has been irking my spirit since 2017 y’all, for real. 😪

And she irks me even more when Michonne looks over and sees Jadis for the first time, leading the snake to just smugly be like, “Oh. There it is. She saw me.” She’s getting off on this stuff and it’s annoying. 🙄

And it’s in this moment where you see Rick have a system shutdown experience. 😞 Like there’s just one too many threats pointed his wife’s way and he can’t take it anymore.

Rick is a man whose heart lives outside of his chest because his heart is his family. You can’t truly debilitate him until you come for them. And so when his wife’s life was threatened like eight different times in the span of a few hours you see him just be overcome with overwhelm at the danger his wife is in.

Like y'all, he’s just a boy in love with a girl whose life is at risk at every turn and that’s intolerable to him since he feels made to protect her. And he wants Michonne safe by any means necessary cuz for Rick, something bad happening to her is 1000x worse than anything they could do to him. Plus, he knows if anything happens to Michonne he won't ever bounce back from that loss.

gif cred: @nat111love

So with Pearl no longer helping them, Jadis' insufferable self, and even Beale noting Michonne among thousands…it’s too much for a man who feels wholly devoted to keeping Michonne out of harm's way and who quite literally needs her to live in order for him to live at all. So we see Rick snap, ready to do anything to get Michonne out of here asap. Including breaking her heart. 😓

Rick sees Michonne seeing Jadis and immediately walks to her, not wanting this to escalate between the two ladies. But then things escalate between him and Michonne because he grabs Michonne’s arm and pulls her to the side...even tho not far enough to the side if you ask me lol. I was like surely a soldier is going to be able to look over and be like 'Why are Grimes and Consignee Bethune arguing like a married couple over there? 🧐'

As Rick grabs Michonne, who is clearly taken by surprise and understandably confused as to what the heck Jadis is doing here, Rick just says, “It doesn’t matter.” But I was like Rick, what? 🤔 It matters a ton because it’s Jadis's threats that are why Rick switched up on thinking they could escape together in the first place and it would be very helpful for Michonne to know the role Jadis plays in all this. 

gif cred: @nat111love

Michonne says a bewildered, “Jadis?” And she has every right to want answers and be perplexed seeing her. Like there’s clearly a story here that Rick hasn’t mentioned to her yet. Also, I like how, despite last knowing her as 'Anne', when Michonne sees Jadis with the CRM she calls her 'Jadis' because she’s like 'I know this can’t be the reformed version of that heifer, this has got to be the snake Judas version.'

Since Rick has become quite one-track-minded in trying to get Michonne home, he doesn’t seem to get why explaining Jadis' involvement would be a big missing piece in helping Michonne understand what the heck is going on. So he more sternly tells her, “It doesn’t matter!” And I notice once Michonne realizes the testy energy Rick has that's when she yanks her arm from out of his grasp.

And then y’all, this next part is where we get introduced to a new character. 😪👌🏽

See, the Rick we know and love is called The Brave Man. But this new guy at the end of episode three, who happens to look a lot like the Brave Man, is actually a character I like to call The Bold As Hell Talking To His Wife Like That Man.

And The Bold As Hell Talking To His Wife Like That Man, or TBAHTTHWLT Man for short lol, says, “You’re going back to base right now then I’m getting you the hell out of here”

gif cred: @nat111love

And can I just say, I usually pause the scenes throughout to write out my thoughts but the way he’s behaving in this particular scene had me so heated I had to just stop and let the scene play while I stared silently like…🤨😒.

And Rick continues to be TBAHTTHWLT Man when he angrily tells Michonne he’s getting her out of here even if he has to knock her out and put her on the boat himself which…not knock her out??? 🤨 This healthy relationship only gets one knockout and Michonne already cashed in on it when she knocked Rick out in season 5 so...no more of that. That's not how these two knock each other out anymore, okay?😇

gif cred: @chonesmint

And also nawt him doing a little firm hand movement for emphasis. 🙃 He lost his mind.

gif cred: @nat111love

Michonne is listening to this with her eyes wide in utter shock that her man is speaking to her like this. Plus, he's the one who told her multiple times that they'd get away together and now he’s on ten acting like she’s crazy for thinking they were ever going to go home together.

Rick really was putting her on a roller coaster since she’s been in the CRM. One minute they’re breathlessly making out with all the passion in the world and the next he’s telling her “I belong here, you don’t, and you will never change that.” 

It’s sad that he’s convinced himself he belongs here. He knows strong people don’t belong here but he’s convinced himself he’s not strong anymore. 😢 When he decided to die he felt he died a failure and he’s lost his confidence that he can be more than that.

gif cred: @nat111love

Saying 'you will never change that' is also wild because Michonne can always change Rick’s mind. He’s been aware of that since years ago, like when he told Michonne she could’ve talked him out of his hidden guns ploy in ASZ in season 5.

Also, this tone he's using...I hadn’t heard Rick speak to Michonne in this tone since the season 3 “we patch you up and then you’re gone” days. And just like that line in season 3, Rick does not truly mean the things he's saying here in TOWL episode 3 either.

Then TBAHTTHWLT Man wants to get extra hurtful when he tries to announce the end of Richonne, saying, “It’s over. Everything we had is broken. You hear me?”

gif cred: @nat111love

Ok first; it was bad enough hearing him say that but then the truculent 'you hear me?' on top of it…TBAHTTHWLT Man and I had beef in this scene, I must say.

But also I’m a big fan of paying attention to wording. And the wording here is very telling. Notice, he doesn’t say we’re over. But it’s over.

'We’re over' would feel a lot more break-up-y but 'it’s over 'feels like saying whatever hope we had of being together is over more than saying there’s nothing between us. After all those kisses he knows that lie would never be bought. So he says 'it’s over.'

gif cred: @nat111love

And then saying 'everything we had is broken,' still leaves room for the fact that something outside of themselves broke what they had.

Still, hearing 'everything we had is broken; is just such a crushing thing to hear tho. 🥺

Like fortunately Rick is not nearly as good of an actor as Andrew Lincoln and so you know right here and now that he doesn’t mean any of this and it’s a bold-faced lie, but still that it was said at all is painful. Especially when you see Michonne’s face reacting to these hurtful untruths. 😞

gif cred: @nat111love

She’s been through hell trying to save Rick and now he’s being so uncharacteristically cold to her and becoming the biggest obstacle to her mission of saving him and getting them home to their kids.

But I love it when you see the subtle shift in her expression. Like at first as she’s listening to Rick essentially try to break up with her (which is just crazy to even type out) she seems really flabbergasted and hurt and also like she can sense an underlying subtext to what’s going on. Like she looks concerned not for her but for him. He’s clearly reacting from a place of trauma and anxiety and she’s like okay what’s really going on with you cuz this is a cry for help.

At this moment I almost thought Michonne might look around wondering who the heck he was talking to and then with concern be like...

I mean, Michonne started talking to her 'dead' lover again in season 9 so maybe Rick started seeing people who aren't actually there again. It happens lol.

But for real, when Rick says that stern “You hear me?” you can see Michonne realize something else - she realizes that her husband has introduced a game for the two of them to play called the Crazy-Off. 😋

And right now Rick is in the lead by talking to her cash crazy. But as a true blue winner, Michonne is ready to come in at the buzzer and win this Crazy-Off that her husband has started. 😜

But for real I do think Michonne blinks and stares at him at the end hearing more of the subtext of what he’s saying. She looks like she’s thinking, ‘Rick, that’s a strange way to say ‘hey I’m stressed and scared for us, so can you take over?’ but okay I translated it, and don’t worry...

It's interesting because no man has ever loved a woman more than Rick loves Michonne and no woman has ever loved a man more than Michonne loves Rick. And once they reunited in TOWL, for Michonne her love for him manifests itself as fuel that makes her fight harder, and for Rick his love for her manifests itself as fear that makes him try so hard to protect her even from himself because he’s terrified of something happening to her. 

But Michonne knows that this breakup talk is BS and so now she’s ready to take matters into her own hands because, as Danai said, she can’t have this man in her presence like this any longer. 👌🏽

gif cred: @ricksmarlene

And it’s funny because at first glance it might appear like Michonne's silent reaction is her reacting equanimously to all this. But the way her eyes are moving and twitching while looking at Rick, she's definitely communicating if you want to get crazy, we can get crazy.

Now don’t get me wrong, I can comprehend what Rick was doing in this scene. I get that this behavior is all actually coming from how much he loves her and is terrified of something happening to her. While he's presenting as angry, what he really feels is fear. And he knows she won’t leave without him because she loves him and so he’s trying to break her heart so that she’ll be more willing to leave him behind and make it home alive.

...But I still think it’s not okay and absolutely crazy that he thought this approach would work. 

And again, if Rick wants to get crazy…well Michonne had to remind him...

So now, they’re sitting across from each other on the helicopter during a raging storm. Rick is staring at Michonne and Michonne is staring right back at him with crazy all up in her eyes.

Since season 3, Michonne has never backed down from a steely stare-down with Rick Grimes and she’s not about to do so now.

gif cred: @nat111love

The way she’s staring and smiling without blinking in this helicopter, I’d be more scared of whatever is going through her head than this helicopter rocking about. 🫣 And Rick is more uneasy about her too lol. They’re definitely expressing things without words here.

Also, whoever is piloting this helicopter during this storm has no idea that the real storm a-brewing is between the married couple in the back.

I love the way Michonne just stayed looking at him with that smize being like you seem to have forgotten who I am but it’s all good cuz I’m going to quickly remind you. I could just feel the way she’s probably thinking - I’ve been through too much, you’ve been through too much, we’ve been through too much to end it this way. So if we’re gonna go out, baby it’s gonna be with a bang. 💥

gif cred: @nat111love

I love how you can visibly see Michonne concocting an unhinged plan in her mind too. 🤭

So the helicopter shakes and Rick is already anxious because he probably has helicopter crash PTSD but then he looks back up at Michonne and tries to maintain his grumpy little face at her but he also is nervous cuz he can tell she’s up to something.

Then Rick starts getting legit panicked from the violent shaking of the helicopter. But Michonne is so locked in about what she’s about to do that she’s completely unfazed by the helicopter. Let it rock. 😌

gif cred: @nat111love

Michonne just calmly looks out the window at the water below as she again speaks to her daughter in an unforgettable episode ender.

gif cred: @nat111love

Michonne says, “Shoto, it’s Daito. I’m sorry…” And then Michonne stares right at Rick, unstraps herself, and swiftly grabs Rick, plunging both of them out of the helicopter and into the thundering storm as Rick lets out a panicked yell. Michonne's voiceover then just says with chilling calm, “I don’t know if we’ll be back.”

Wild. 🤯

gif cred: @nat111love

And also what an icon Michonne is. 👑😌 I loved this moment. 👏🏽 I know up to this point Rick probably thought he had tried every method in the book to get home but Michonne was like have you tried plummeting out of a moving helicopter?...let's try that.

Rick didn’t realize of all the people to be nervous about it was actually Michonne, not the others he should have most been on high alert for. 😋

Michonne really said oh you’ll do anything to save me? Guess what? I’ll do anything to save you, so off this helicopter we go. And her pulling this move was her letting Rick Grimes, the CRM, and Gravity itself know she's that girl and nothing is stopping her. 💅🏽

gif cred: @nat111love

I love how Michonne will both literally and figuratively do what needs to be done. Like figuratively and literally knocking some sense into Rick in season 5 or literally and figuratively yanking Rick out of his stormy state in TOWL.

The way she told Shoto 'I don’t know if we’ll be back' - Michonne basically was like your daddy is tripping, Shoto, so I don't know if this story ends with us going home to Alexandria or me sending him to the heavenly home above.

And honestly, if Judith had heard Rick talking cash crazy to Michonne like that she would have had some words cuz she does not play about her mama. Idk if her parents would ever tell her this part of the story one day but if they do, I personally think Judith would be in full support of what Michonne did. 😅

But also I really like the wording of 'I don't know if we’ll be back' because it poses the question to be beautifully and expertly explored in the next episode. Can Rick and Michonne find their way back to each other in a more internal sense? Right now Michonne doesn’t know for certain. But as a true Get Things Done Grimes she’s gonna try to find out during an incredibly riveting Richonne 'timeout.'

So the exciting episode 3 ends with an empty helicopter and rain pouring as we’re set up for what comes next.

And what comes next is an experience that transcends television.

An experience that profoundly explores the depths of Richonne and takes the characters to their highest heights.

An experience that features some of Andy and Danai's absolute best performances.

An experience so great and addicting that every single scene had rewind buttons around the world looking like...

"What We" is a true standout within the TWD franchise, and most of all it's an experience that was exceptionally written by the illustrious Danai Gurira herself. 👑👏🏽

So now, my fellow Richonne fans, stans, & friends...

We have got to talk about every fine detail in the masterpiece that is Episode 4. 😇🎉👌🏽

[ririsasy]

Comparing how Deva react when someone touched Varadha (his moon and sun) vs Aadhya (the supposed love interest somehow)

Deva here was so annoying lmao I feel so so bad for Aadhya 😭 I mean when the goon literally grabbed Aadhya into their arms and took selfie with her blatantly in front of him, what did he do? Lmao he just stand there like not reacting or reacting but it’s just so delayed, in the 1st gif he was staring at what they do to her but there’s no uncontrollable instant rage there because he still could hold that tiffin carrier perfectly without shaking even a little bit 😂😂 and he only moves his feet forward after the goon started dragging Aadhya with them.

Compare the shaking rage when Naarang touched Varadha (in video format we could see better how badly his hands shook with anger[1]) even after he had killed the man, separate the head from his body, the anger still fresh in his bones to the point he was still shaking even after they have reached their prison cells, just thinking about it again enough to reignite his fury. He wished he could have killed Naarang all over again for such offense.

But with Aadhywe saw that he could even hold himself back quickly afterward and even went as far as stepping one step back lmao so freaking annoying 😭😭 man your mother told you not to fight, she wasn’t forbidding you from showing your emotions or anything unless there’s none when it’s not about your Varadha, his annoying ass care more about Amma caught him with a cigarette in his hand that he quickly hide it behind his back as soon as he saw Amma 😭 drop the freaking cigarette already boy this wasn’t the time to care about such thing!! Drop the food container too instead just drop everything and quickly show a fist !!!

I am gonna compare even the way Deva quickly form his fist [2] when he was angry for Varadha here, it was spontaneous yet again the fury inside him building up that he couldn't control it, he could unclench his fist only after Varadha basically soothed him with his fingers here.

to the way how long it took Deva just to form a fist when he was saving Aadhya lmao it took him at least 5 minutes (I am not even kidding a literal 5 minutes from the time that goon grabbed and dragged Aadhya to Deva finally throw the first punch, Prashanth really is not serious at all to make them as love interest) even though you’re not gonna use your fist but show some real anger to us audiences with your body language boy 😬 react!! That’s your future baby mama (say sike) as your director intended boy.

Let’s compare Deva’s reaction when it is his real baby mama that his heart desire Varadha. At first Naarang looked only at Deva, Deva immediately accepted his fate, he looked down ready to die for his own action, it was him who killed Vishnu during the ceasefire so he was ready to die for that, he’s okay with his fate because he didn’t regret his action it was the right thing to do and for his conscience.

But then Naarang looked over Varadha, this was just a mere look okay, Naarang shifting his gaze from him to Varadha and this little movement of an eyeball enough to make Deva react instantly, look how immediately he was moving in front of Varadha to shield him even from Naarang’s gaze, only then he experienced dread in his bones, his face looked so panicked, only now he felt the weight of his action. This man is insane when it came to Varadha’s safety you can’t play with it at all.

Then when Naarang step one step forward, Deva already sprinting toward him because no, not Varadha, not when he’s still breathing he just couldn’t handle it, his whole being couldn’t handle the possibility of seeing Varadha to be in any kind of harm when he’s right there with him and he was the cause for Varadha to be in that danger.

Only then he knows regret, now he is regretting his impulsive action (even though it was the right thing to do but if it caused Varadha's life, he rather not do it, he basically was wishing he could turn back time so he didn't have to kill Vishnu, selling his own principle even his own soul and conscience) because the price is too great which is Varadha's safety that's why suddenly this strong capable man who just killed dozens of people plead, pleaded with his hands clasped together in front his chest, there's fear in his expression he was so desperate, he went as far as begged on his knees, anything he would do for Varadha.

It resonated with what Amma said 7 years after this event like either plead or make them bleed, just stop them (the way you did back then when you desperately want to save your loved one, oh Amma have heard this story from Bilal again and again and this was definitely the call back for that action) because Deva did both for Varadha, he will plead for his safety, will be on his knees begging and definitely (as last resort) will make anyone who dare to lay their hands on Varadha bleed.

Deva looked so damn pitiful I feel so sorry for him, the whole court room was watching, this was honestly another declaration of love from Deva just like the way he did 25 years ago when he held the electric wire in his hands and bleed for Varadha in front of the crowd putting a nose ring back to him with his own hand. I mean you have to be blind or deaf in Khansaar after this blatant display of devotion in front of the entire courtroom from Deva to Varadha to not understand that Deva belongs to Varadha body and soul.

I know how scared Deva was in this moment because he didn't even flinch or heard even Varadha's own warning anymore to just stop, because just like Deva, Varadha was also so ready to die in Deva's state (because for Varadha he was the one to blame, he brought Deva to this wretched place that is Khansaar knowing damn well of his hero complex and his impulsive tendency to fight what's wrong and Khansaar is full of all the damn wrong things).

Deva's focus was solely in making Naarang to stop going toward Varadha, he was just getting knocked with the back of that sword on his head but he quickly get back up to put himself between Varadha and Naarang again, and went as far as grabbing Naarang's shoulders forcing him to face him and yet again making himself as a shield for Varadha with his body so Naarang couldn't even look at Varadha.

Also in this moment when they taunted to touch Aadhya, oh Deva was mad, I mean who wouldn't be mad when you see a girl getting harrassed right in front of you, but the eyes weren't actually murderous kind of mad and he still could hold himself back, he was angry for Aadhya because she didn't deserve to be treated that way, because it was just generally wrong and anyone with conscience would be furious for Aadhya's sake and would love to teach those goons a good beating lesson.

But with Varadha it was so damn personal, Varadha belongs to him and no one should touch him, the way his expression flipped instantly to murderous intent [3] as soon as Naarang touched Varadha, and he wasn't even looking but he was that offended!! I mean also the way he was ready to jump at Vishnu's men who "only accidentally" brushed Varadha's shoulder but his fury was something else if Varadha didn't stop him he definitely gonna beat them into pulp too.

The conclusion of Deva's action (reaction) in this essay is that was the case of common rage, natural rage in the face of evil wrongdoings when he was fighting for Aadhya because that was the right thing to do because he was a capable man for that VS the instant uncontrollable rage that's so personal it offended his entire soul when he was fighting for Varadha because he was protecting the one he considered his family, part of his own soul, the one who we usually call a lover.

If I was Aadhya I too would have laughed pitifully at myself lmao for falling for a man who already have his own moon and sun that he would do anything for

Comparing how he was reacting when he was saving me to when he was with his own baby lmao “damn that man is clearly not right in the head. A true maniac and it’s all for Varadha’s sake.” . Aadhya is pretty much aware to whom Deva belongs to after she listened the full story from Bilal about their relationship, just like Radha Rama who said that Deva is Varadha’s Salaar, Aadhya said “Varadha got himself a maniac” lol everyone with eyes and perfect ears listening to their story alone enough to understand and know that these two men belong to each other and no one can come between them. (And definitely not a new girl from USA who just came to Deva's life maximum 7 days 😭 girl just go home. It's 7 years + 25 years + 10 years of pining against your 7 days. You have lost before even fighting this battle girl.)

[running-in-the-dark]

got a reply from a seller I messaged about this - I now want to buy these hooks in all the sizes I don't have yet. previously I only bought like maybe one a year because they are pretty pricy for one crochet hook. but knowing I won't be able to get them in the future ....

and they told me that they've been having issues with this. the manufacturer keeps sending out different versions in the same packaging (both the new hooks that I got came in packaging that showed the old ones). then they sent me pictures of the ones that they currently have in stock. they're all the old style!! ... except the 8 mm one, which is the one I was specifically looking for in the first place 😭

there's one kind of crochet hook that I can use without pain in my hand/wrist. they're expensive but worth it for me.

except now they're different and they just suck. they changed the shape, material, and even the hook itself. I know they have and that this is really the new version because I messaged the manufacturer - that's how much this bothered me.

the new version is worse than the cheap ones I have from a set that costs less for 10 than one of these does...

[queen-helaenas-pet-spider]

HOUSE OF THE DRAGON SPOILERS!!!

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What a lot of people don't realize is that during the scene where Aemond hurts Helaena and fights with Alicent, he's literally saying and doing the EXACT SAME THINGS that ALICENT herself has said and done their WHOLE LIVES!

1. Aemond yelling about how their birthrights have now been defiled by Rhaenyra {who invited all of the known Valyrian bastards in King’s Landing to Dragonstone, and now three of them are dragon riders} and that they're in more danger now than ever.

Alicent ranting and raving to {I'm assuming} all of her kids that if Rhaenyra becomes Queen, she's gonna kill them all.

2. Aemond storming over, grabbing Helaena's arm too tight, and trying to drag her out of the room, only to be stopped by Alicent.

Alicent hitting Aegon II and grabbing him too tight.

In that moment, Alicent was literally fighting HERSELF!

I don't excuse what he did, but I DO get WHY he snapped:

1. Aemond was groomed to be the real man of the house, since Aegon II is useless beyond being Viserys I's firstborn son and Otto's puppet. He gave EVERYTHING for them! That's A LOT for someone who's not even in his 20's yet!

2. He knows he fucked up by killing Lucerys, hurting Aegon II and Sunfyre during Rook's Rest, parading Meley's head through King's Landing, etc, and needs all the help he can get. Despite Vhagar being HUGE, she's old and slow, and almost all the Team Black dragons are younger and swifter.

And even though Daeron and Tessarion are on their way they're still outnumbered, so he understandably assumes that Helaena {despite her gentle nature} would at least want to avenge her child by killing Daemon, the man that hired his killers. And during their scene outside, it's clear that he genuinely regrets hurting Helaena.

Seeing them fuck shit up together would've been SO COOL AND SWEET!!! 🥺🥺🕷🕷💎💎🐲🐲🔥🔥💚💚

3. While he's DESPERATELY trying to keep them all {but Aegon II} alive during the war that ALICENT and OTTO started, one that they're LOSING {though some of it was his own fault}, his MOTHER and his FAVORITE SIBLING don't give a fuck, and TURN ON HIM!

Gods help them all if Aemond finds out that ALICENT handed them to the ENEMY all because she missed her former stepdaughter/situationship!!!!!!! 😬😬🐲🐲🔥🔥

Aemond, Ewan, y'all deserved SO MUCH BETTER!!! 💀💀

[tojiscrack]

Guess who found your fic on ao3 at 11pm, not noticing the 108k words on the bottom and got so hooked even by the half quarter of the first chapter that resulted in her staying awake until 10 am, reading all 108k words in one sitting. Yes me. Me, who got so hooked she read it all in one sitting. Me, who’s now so emotionally attached to this fic that she’s anxious about your comments under the chapters, stating that THE MAIN PLOT hasn’t even STARTED YET. Me, who knows DAMN WELL the little caterpillars and butterflies and the moths story Megumi and y/n read out is for sure foreshadowing. Me, who’s noticed several butterfly symbolism used over the course of the story. Me, who screamed into her pillow when it was stated that y/n’a dress resembled a butterfly. Me, who’s seen your comment replying to someone, stating that there MIGHT be some kind of drifting apart. Me, who’s well ware of the Heavy Angst tag on the fic. Me, who knows that an author who’s this good at delivering humor and fluff is gonna DESTROY me when the angst is gonna be written. Me, who half regrets now that she’s discovered the story because she’s scared of all that’s about to come.

You seriously have a way with words, dialogue, symbolism, humor, the bond between every character. It’s not so simple to put more than 5 characters in a setting and deal with them all while trying to make it as natural as possible but you SOMEHOW do it SO WELL. I’m just. God. All the thoughts I have on this fic would maybe even rival the 108k words you’ve written up until now but I don’t have the capacity to put them into words as well as you do.

just know that this fic impacted me so much, so badly, years from now on after it's finished, I'll still think about it and re-read it.

so excited (and scared as hell ngl) to see where you'll be going with this story. I may havw joined late but I am sticking around till the end.

love you, great work <3

liar, liar masterlist here:

yayyy, another ao3 reader 😫 welcome to the tumblr crew, i’m so glad you’re hereeee ❤️‍🩹

i had to go back and check whether it really is 108k words and i found myself shocked bc damn, i really wrote that much? 😭 if i put half the effort i put into this story into my essays instead, maybe i’d be a better student but we live and we learn ig 😬

“emotionally attached” to the fic is mind blowing to me 🥹 i didn’t know it’d have this big of an impact on someone but i can’t say i’m displeased. that’s one of the nicest things i’ve heard on here (among other things ofc). ugh, you’re so nice for sending a message on that 🩷

and yes, you are absolutely right. the main plot does not start until next chapter (or more accurately — in terms of drama — somewhere down the line AFTER that) 👀 idk which comment i said that on but i trust ur judgement ‘cause i remember mentioning that somewhere 😭 DON’T BE SCARED, IT’LL BE FUN (and thrilling and scary) BUT STILL 😊

the butterfly thing you mentioned is interesting, actually 🫢 maybe i just really like butterflies (even tho they scare the ever living shit out of me and i nearly killed a few in the london zoo YEARS ago as a child cuz i was fidgeting since they just let them roam free in that greenhouse thingy and i was scared for my life and dying of heat with the humidity?).

YOU MUST HAVE BEEN STALKING MY PAGE BC I DO REMEMBER SAYING SMTH ALONF THOSE LINES I JUST CAN’T REMEMBER WHERE 😭 but i invite you to continue doing so bc i like watching my lovely little liars squirm and then send in their predictions and fear 😋 and this long, juicy message has me giggling to myself and REELING 🤭

yeah, but we’re not holding back on the heavy angst tag… er… buckle up? it’s gonna go downhill from here on out 😟

“you seriously have a way with words” — stop.

“it’s not so simple to put more than 5 characters in a setting and deal with them all while trying to make it as natural as possible but you somehow do it so well” — DOUBLE, TRIPLE, QUADRUPLE, INFINITY STOP OR I’LL CRY 🥹 no one has ever said that about my writing, and in fact, i hadn’t even noticed that myself 😭 i think i’m gonna levitate in glee ✨ to know it flows well enough for it to be commented on (out of ur own free will and not me pressing a gun to ur forehead), it’s just UGHHH so nice and sweet and i’m so glad you’ve joined the liar, liar community 😫 warmest welcome ml <3

gosh you’ve put this story on such a high pedestal, i’m almost scared i won’t be able to meet ur standards, even with everything planned beforehand 😟 but i’m willing to try. if you’re here for the super long ride (my updates are sporadic and will continue to be a such as the time goes on).

it was definitely not a LATE arrival per se — the liar, liar family is still pretty small. i’ve only got about 321 followers, so definitely not as much as the bigger jjk writers on here, and half of those are split between my megumi fic readers and levi fic readers. i now consider you an og just bc this analysis was so in depth and interesting, i found myself smiling so hard my cheeks hurt 🙂‍↔️

but i love you SO much for this. i’d love to see more comments and messages from you. don’t be afraid to spam me if you must (in fact, i encourage it!!!) 😁 i get so giddy and excited and motivated when ppl send me their predictions. it’s one of the greatest things about writing (and the best part imo).

have a lovely day! and i can’t wait for you to see the next chapter and what i have in store for you <3

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for skipping out on shifts at my part-time job to finish university assignments?

I (27nb) work 20hrs a week as a customer service assistant at a supermarket to keep me afloat while I do my master's degree. Honestly, juggling both of them is fucking exhausting. I make it work most of the time, but I also have ADHD which puts me in the position of doing a LOT of last-minute work and all-nighters to keep up with deadlines, despite my best intentions and efforts.

A couple times now, I've found myself in a position where I have to make a choice: go to work that day, or stay home to finish an essay due tomorrow morning so I can submit it right down to the wire. As much as I REEEEALLY need this job to paying the bills and, you know, eat, it's ultimately just an interim thing for me - I mean, I do not want to get trapped in retail for the rest of my fucking life. That's why I'm doing this degree in the first place!! The degree and my future aspirations takes priority for me, so I fake sick and call out of work.

Now, I don't call out of work last minute for no reason — I don't do it just because I don't feel like it, or because I want to go out instead. (Not that I think that automatically makes me at all "better" than people who do — we're all wage cucks at the end of the day, abolish capitalism, etc etc — just to give the context that I'm not leaving my coworkers to pick up the slack for reasons that aren't related to either uni deadlines or genuine illness.) I'm no slouch when I'm at work either. I have no loyalty to the supermarket itself — I'm not gonna break my fucking back for a company that barely knows I exist — but I'll pull my weight so that my coworkers and I can all leave on time at the end of the night. All that to say, my coworkers and shift managers know I put the work in when needed.

I also DO like most of my coworkers. I don't love the work but my manager is decent enough, and I get along well with the team there. I honestly don't want anyone there to struggle or overwork themselves because of understaffing — which is getting to be more and more of an issue lately as we're literally hemorrhaging staff.

All that said — I don't regret putting my degree first, but I DO feel kind of guilty about pulling out from shifts last minute when I know we already don't have enough hands. Especially this most recent time, where I called in "sick" and discovered that I was the THIRD employee to call in sick that morning (😬😬😬). And my shift manager sounded REALLY fucking stressed about it. Oof.

So AITA for faking sick and leaving my coworkers short-staffed because of my own struggles to meet university deadlines?

(🐌 so I can find this later)

What are these acronyms?

[yarrystyleeza]

Fixing Ties

Chapter Two snippet under the cut!!! 💕✨

In the other room, the heat was rising up his neck, he was nervous, his hands are shaking. The sound of her heels softly clicking on the wooden floor is making his heart tick faster with each step she takes. She takes a sip of her coffee, her heart beats faster and she's smiling. He's jittering with each breath she takes, she's looking outside the window and tucking her stray bangs behind her ear, her earring swings to the movement of her hand, and his heart sways with it.

He regrets not answering the phone, he wouldn't have to shake like a broken blender despite her standing in a completely different room—yet he couldn't leave her waiting downstairs.

He couldn't tie his necktie, no matter how hard he tried, his hands kept trembling and his mind kept straying. "Damn it..." he cursed under his breath, but it was loud enough for her to hear it.

"Are you okay, Matt?" she asked, still giving him privacy. He walked out of his room, tie in his hand and face is flustered.

"Couldn't tie it," he sighed. She approaches, his heart is burning and the blood is pumping wild in his ears.

"Can I help you with it?" she asks, her fingertips are softly touching his. He nods. She feels his hands shaking beneath her touch. "Are you alright?" she asks with a smile, her voice is warm with worry, "you're shaking..."

He knows, oh Hell—he knows. "I... I don't-- I don't know..." he blurts, "maybe I'm just... Tired... Yeah."

She takes the black tie and starts wrapping it around her arm. "Learned this trick a while ago," she says, "you spread the thick part along your arm and wrap the thin part three times around your wrist," she explains, "then you pull the second loop through the first loop... And we're done. You're just gonna have to put it on."

She smiled proudly at herself. "I'm just gonna adjust it a bit..." she fixes the length of each end and widens the loop. "Can I help you put it on-- unless you want to--do it yourself--"

He shook his head, "of course—you can... Thank you." he smiles with his red face as she passes his head through the noose.

"You're welcome," she responded with a grin, fixing his collar around the noose before fitting it around his neck. "It looks good," she addressed, smiling.

"I've been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night

But now I see daylight, I only see daylight" 💕✨

Close-ups:

I can't emphasize how much I love this piece, I'm really proud of myself 🥺🥺🥺 I tried new things like working on lighting and shadow 😋 I need to study for my next exam on Tuesday tho 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬

[s1llysmut]

Is it okay to ask for a Valentino NSFW alphabet ❓

A/N: I was gonna do one earlier but I wasn’t sure if anyone would want one. Sorry if you wanted him to be nice or something, it’s just not who he is 😬

NSFW alphabet for Valentino

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Aftercare? With Valentino? HA! Yeah no he doesn’t even know what that word means in English or Spanish. But if you’re female he might buy you the morning after pill?

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favourite body part on himself is his tongue for obvious reasons. On you he likes your holes. All of your holes.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He always cums inside. No condom. He doesn’t give a shit.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He doesn’t have any, he’s an open book when it comes to sex.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s extremely experienced. He runs a porn studio so duh he knows what he’s doing.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

If he’s having a good day he’ll make you work for it and ride him. If he’s having a bad day and needs to let off some steam he is absolutely railing you from behind.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Serious. If you laugh or make a joke he will make sure you regret it.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He shaves it. Not sure why, he just does.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Intimacy? Romance? With Valentino?

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He doesn’t jerk off, he just uses one of his whores.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

BDSM, bondage, sadomasochism, dacryphilia, blood, voyeurism, exhibitionism, etc.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Anywhere and everywhere. I mean it.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

If he’s angry he gets really horny.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He would never let you dominate him. You can try but you will fail miserably and he will laugh at your pathetic attempt.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

You think he cares about your pleasure? No. You’re on your knees sucking him off whenever he wants.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Fast and rough 24/7. He’s never gentle.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He doesn’t mind them. He’ll punish you if you’re not fast enough though.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Obviously he takes risk. At least if they interest him.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He can last about 6 rounds. Pretty impressive actually.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He has a whole bin of everything you could name.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He’s extremely unfair. He genuinely doesn’t care if you’re having fun as long as he is.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He’s loud but not like Angel Dust level of loud. Mostly dirty talk.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He will make you hump his thigh until you cum.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

8 inches pretty girthy. Good luck.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Have you met this man? His sex drive is extremely high. Like, off the charts.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He doesn’t have time to sleep. He just gets up and leaves.