#�� NOVE WRITES

[spectorgram]

FAN BEHAVIOR

characters: dick grayson, jason todd, tim drake summary: batboys with a celebrity! reader content/warnings: fem! reader, fluff

DICK GRAYSON

You’re an actress who has had a meteoric rise, moving from doing small, one-off parts in TV shows to becoming a breakout star on a particularly popular series to being cast in major movie productions

Your stardom is still a little surreal to you and when you’re invited to a wayne enterprise charity gala, you contemplate not going — what business do you have being somewhere with people far more famous than you? But when you tell your agent this, she gives you a look that says you’re insane for even considering declining

You’ll forever be grateful that she urged you to do so because that’s where you meet Dick

He’s standing with Bruce Wayne, chatting with some frequent donors, dressed in a perfectly-tailored navy blue suit when he sees you out of the corner of his eye and he lights up. He approaches you first with that megawatt smile and introduces himself with an extended hand and says, “I’m a huge fan! I’ve been watching your stuff since you were in Legends of the Kingdom!” And the rest is history

Dick goes to every red carpet event you invite him to and he makes it a point to attend every private premiere screening and public opening night

He definitely shushes anyone who talks during your movies or TV shows and does not care if people think he’s obnoxious.

You’re definitely the ‘it couple’ and your faces are plastered constantly on magazine covers and two-page spreads

There are people who try to sow discord in your relationship and their go-to is either pointing out how different you are to Dick’s former girlfriends; that you’re not his type, that this isn’t going to last, etc., or that you’re not talented enough for the fame you have or to be dating Dick Grayson

It definitely gets to you and does nothing to whatever lingering imposter syndrome you harbor but Dick is such a grounding force, reminding you that it’s all just noise and that he loves you completely and unconditionally

At home, he likes to rewind your scenes in shows and movies, and it flatters you as much as it flusters you

He also likes to read through scripts with you when he can and his voices for the various other characters bring you to tears from laughter 

So many intentional and unintentional thirst trap couples pics. Like, a selfie you post one morning — Dick is shirtless and you’re in one of his old t-shirts and its sliding down your shoulder and showing your collarbone and you’re both laying on your stomachs in your shared bed, hair sleep (and sex) tousled with the morning sun making both of you look like you’re golden and glowing 

JASON TODD

You meet Jason as Red Hood first when you’re running from the paparazzi but you don’t know it’s him

They chase you down a couple of blocks before someone tugs you into an alleyway and you’re about to scream for help when you see who it is. Red Hood shields you as the paparazzi pass and when you ask him why he helped you, he simply says, “I hate the paps and you looked like you needed a hand.”

Once he’s sure the coast is clear, he walks you back to your hotel using the back alleys of Gotham. You make several attempts to strike a conversation up with him in the first few minutes of your walk but what seems to catch his interest is when you start rambling on about just finishing Dostoevsky’s Crime and Punishment. 

You’re disappointed when you arrive at your hotel and you’re rush inside to find a pad to scribble your number on but he’s gone when you return, disappearing into the night

It’s by chance that you meet him again (unbeknownst to you), this time in his civilian identity as Jason Todd. You’re in disguise at a bookstore in Gotham when you bump into him and spill his iced coffee all over both of you, apologizing profusely and offering to buy him another drink, which he accepts. (His voice is oddly familiar to you but you can’t put your finger on why) 

You two keep in touch and start dating privately. The long-distance is difficult at times given your very different and busy schedules and Jason is pretty cagey about what he does but you both make time for each other as much as possible

He tells you that he listens to your music during his workouts and in the background while he’s doing stuff around his apartment. He hums along too.

He recommends your songs to anyone who listens, which raises suspicions in the Batfam, and it obviously doesn’t take long for them to figure out that he’s dating you but he makes them promise to keep it to themselves. 

Whenever you have a concert in Gotham, which you make a point to do frequently, Jason is in the VIP box, bobbing his head and mouthing along to your songs. When it ends, he’s right there backstage with flowers and a thermos of tea for your throat

Your relationship goes public when fans capture of video of you two leaving one of your concerts together, Jason’s leather jacket draped over your shoulders

You eventually move to Gotham to be closer to him and the two of you spend every free moment either of you have together, making up for lost time. 

You still try to keep your relationship as private as possible but fans eat up any crumbs they get, including the occasional selfie of you both 

He is your biggest inspiration for songs and also your biggest help. You love bouncing ideas off of him and he likes sitting with you when you pick at your guitar strings and mumble a half-formed melody

(You eventually do find out that he’s Red Hood when he tumbles through the window of your bedroom, bleeding profusely, and you have to take his helmet off to assess the damage)

TIM DRAKE

You’ve known Tim since you were kids given that your parents ran in the same social circles

You started out as a child model in department store clothing catalogs. Tim did some shoots with you too but while his parents eventually stopped auditioning him for such jobs, you continued until the present day, and you’re now a well-known supermodel 

You two have been friends forever and the internet laps up your interactions together. There are compilations of videos and photos of the two of you at banquets and red carpet events and memes with text like “when will someone look at me like that?”

Before you two even started dating, there were articles about a supposed romance and sexual tension between you two. In interviews, you would vehemently deny anything asked about it and reiterate that you two are just good friends

At some point, however, you start seeing your childhood friend in a different light. He’s kind, brilliant, funny, attentive, and very handsome. It’s not that you didn’t know that before but it’s different now. You find yourself shying away his casual touches and suddenly conscious of your actions around him — did you laugh too loud? Is your hair in your face? Does he know how you feel? Can he tell?

You don’t want to ruin your friendship, as cliche as it sounds, so you did your best to keep your feelings under wraps, which resulted in you distancing yourself. When Tim would text to congratulate you on your latest Vogue cover or runway show, you would simply shoot a simple ‘thanks!’ text back instead of the usual ‘THANK U’ followed by five heart emojis. 

He confronts you about it one day and you’ve never really been a good liar in front of him so you tell him, bracing for a gentle rejection but instead receiving a kiss. 

You made a hard launch post with him on Instagram and received hundreds of DMs of people saying they were vindicated in believing that “friends don’t look at each other like that”

Tim is in the front row at every single runway show you have, dressed impeccably in an expensive suit. He takes pictures of you and visits you backstage with your favorite sweet treat.

After fashion shows and other events, you return to his apartment to let your hair down and put your feet up. You do your skincare routines together, sheet face mask and all, and snuggle on the couch for some TV or just to hang out and talk endlessly

You’re very active on social media with him and you two have a lot of couples posts together. When you both have time, you do Instagram lives where people watch you two make dinner together or answer some questions from viewers. A fan favorite is when you choose outfits for each other.

During a runway, you blow a kiss at Tim in the audience and the camera zooms in on his face, where he just watches you with a lovestruck expression and bright red ears — it’s in almost every video compilation that’s titled something like ‘15 minutes of Tim Drake being a simp’

[the-blossica-fan]

Vertin eventually just makes her list for the Arcanists she has shorter by combining the names of those who are in a relationship.

Blossica, Isokania, Windla, Kantilda; and there is probably more

On one hand it saves a lot of paper in the long run!

On the other: Vertin, please be prepared for if anyone found out 😭

You know, I think Vertin writes or has written fanfiction, she just seems like the kind to have

She probably has thought about it in her many sessions of "I'm so bored I'd do anything not to be" and came up with those.

It all started with a joke from X about something he read once from a coworker and ever since she has been thinking about it.

No one knows, or at least no one SHOULD know.

She also probably gives the "I know what you are" look to some of the most in denial members of her squad (cough cough Matilda). This is Vertin we're talking about, she knows.

The one who is the closest to finding out is actually Madam Z. She's barely in the suitcase but has the most secretive talks about the foundation in Vertin's room for privacy.

Now Madam Z is suspicious. God save Vertin.

I think I went off the rails with this one, it just sparked some electricity in my brain, I apologize. Anyway

I think she has some fun making some names for the ones in a relationship, and since it saved her a lot of time, she will not stop.

Not until she gets found out

[barbreypilled]

also like if ur going to publish derivative fiction im sorry but it has to be good. u actually have to do something interesting with it u can’t just google a bunch of tropes, make the characters do them and call it a day like at that point just do fic prompts I guarantee it will be better in the long run bc u won’t have to inevitably get cancelled for review bombing books that ppl actually had to use their brains for

[sunflowercider]

Oh!!! Corpse explosion magic! Didnt expect to see that in this novel, but it makes sense. This warlock is sneaky!!

[e-thonrudwrites]

Happy third birthday "The Old Guard"! To the inspiration you gave me for my novel, and to all the fanfic I've read of Joe and Nick, and written.

[normalenjoyer-png]

abed abed abed abed abed abed abed abed abeddddddddddddd

[pctaldrunk]

me, trying not to write replies that are A MILLION YEARS LONG and failing miserably:

[dacuslucy]

killing you in real time btw

theres even funnier ones i havent even gotten to yet

[sweetellafontaine]

Ella's heart filled with joy as she spoke about her beloved daughter, Dandelion. Her maternal love knew no bounds, and she dedicated herself to providing the best for her little girl. Ella beamed. " Dandelion made friends with James and his sisters". Anne and Mary, in particular, had taken a liking to Dandelion. Anne was fiercely protective of her and Mary expressed her affection in her own unique way - by fighting off a child who had insulted Dandelion by calling her a baby. Ella couldn't contain her laughter as she shared this amusing anecdote.

Leaning in closer, Ella whispered as if sharing a juicy secret with her closest confidant. "It seems like Dandelion inherited my fine taste.". Ella noted that Dandelion had developed a special bond with Anne. "She even gifted Anne a rose on Valentine's Day", a gesture that melted Ella's heart.

.

"Monday suits me just fine," she replied, daring to lean forward, as if sharing a secret. She was still smiling, she realized. She pressed her lips together, as if to stop herself, imagining how silly she looked. But she couldn't stop. She really had a date with Ella, her first date. She didn't really think this would ever happen.

But it is happening, she told herself, so you better start believing it. Otherwise you're just going to keep embarrassing yourself. For once her mental parroting of her father's words seemed like good advice.

"Duckies! I'll need to get right away on designing ducky plushies," she joked, or rather, half joked. She had never made bird plushies before, but she liked a challenge. "How is she doing at kindergarten? Is she making friends?"

[spectorgram]

the letter

theodore nott x f! reader summary: you get a letter from a secret admirer who wants to confess. your best friend is none too pleased. notes: jealous! theodore nott >>> word count: 1.4k

You would think for a magical school, Hogwarts would have better heating or some heating spell, but the Slytherin dorms are frigid as usual as winter creeps up. You fasten your robe clasps and draw it tighter around you, simultaneously trying to tug your skirt down in a futile way to heat yourself up more. Your knee-high socks only do so much and you pretty much give up on the endeavor as you climb up the stairs and head for the Great Hall. 

You’re immediately greeted by the cozy warmth of the hall, spotting your friends, all swathed in green and silver robes and knits. Theo spots you first, sliding over and nearly knocking Blaise off the bench. “Blood hell, mate,” Blaise grumbles as you approach, kicking Theo’s leg lightly. 

You slip into the space created for you, right in between Theo and Enzo. You stifle a yawn and ask, “Can someone pass the eggs and bacon?”

As Enzo reaches for both platters, Theo’s eyes zero in on your legs. “How are you not cold?”

You frown. “I am,” you reply, piling your breakfast onto your plate, “but Pansy’s demon cat apparently thought my winter tights were toys and decided to scratch them all up.”

Pansy sighs, “I’ve ordered you new ones, calm down.” 

Theo drapes his robe over your legs and you smile gratefully at him. He smiles back and your heart flips. You don’t think you’ll ever get over how beautiful he is — all dark caramel curls and long lashes that frame those devastatingly blue eyes. He’s been your best friend since you started Hogwarts and you knew you loved him at first sight. The longer you’ve known him, the more you’ve fallen for him. 

It’s a tale as old as the world itself: you’re hopelessly in love with your best friend but you value your friendship far too much to do anything to jeopardize it.

“Mail’s here,” you hear someone say down the table. You look up to the ceiling, which has been enchanted to look like a sky that’s about to break open and drop snowflakes from its clouds. Owls soar in through the openings at the top of the walls, diving down towards their intended recipients. 

“Maybe your new tights are here,” Enzo says. 

Pansy adds, “I hope so. Then you’ll stop complaining about it.”

You snort, reaching up to grab a letter dropped by your family owl. You feed her a piece of scrambled egg as she takes off back towards the owlery. You tuck your parents’ letter into the inner pocket of your robe just as another owl swoops overhead, dropping a pale blue envelope on your lap. 

“Who’s that from?” asks Pansy. 

You shrug, using your butter knife to open it up. As you do, Draco grumbles at Mattheo: “For the love of Salazar, stop hogging the pastry basket.”

You skim over the letter addressed to you. You tilt your head in confusion and Blaise asks, “What’s it say?”

Enzo peeks over your shoulder and his face breaks into a smirk. “‘Meet me at the Astronomy Tower at midnight tonight. Signed, Your Secret Admirer.’” he reads.

“What?” Theo suddenly snatches the letter from your hand. You watch in confusion as his eyes dart back and forth. His shoulders tense and his mouth purses into a thin, hard line. 

“You doing okay there, Nott?” Matthew asks, shooting a simpering smile at his friend. Theo sends a glare back but doesn’t say anything, the letter’s paper crinkling under his grip. 

Pansy asks, “Are you going to go?”

You hesitate, surreptitiously glancing at Theo, startled to find that he’s gazing at you with an intensity you’ve never experienced. You pluck the letter from him and fold it neatly. “I think so,” you say. “I’m interested to see who it is.”

“Be sure to bring your wand,” Draco says. “Just in case.”

“Obviously,” you deadpan. The conversation shifts into whether anyone was prepared for midterms coming up. 

You fiddle with the letter in your lap. Theo’s silent for the whole conversation. 

You chew on your bottom lip as you reread the same sentence in your textbook for what feels like the hundredth time. The letter has stuck in your head the whole day. It crosses your mind that it could be a prank or a set-up — it’s not a secret that Slytherin isn’t the most popular House among your classmates — but you know you can handle yourself. You’re more worried about how Theo was acting at breakfast. He didn’t say a word the rest of the meal, not even when Enzo and Mattheo tried looping him into the conversation. He just sat there, sullen and gloomy, and his mood seemed to worsen more when you handed him his robe back and said you had to get to class.

You sigh heavily, trying to play out every possible scenario that could happen between you and the letter writer. You check the clock in the library: 11:45; you need to head over to the Astronomy Tower. 

You groan, gathering your things, sliding them into your bag, and making your way back to the Slytherin common room to drop off your things in your dorm. “Cacophony,” you supply to the portrait, which swings open to let you in.

The common room is blissfully silent when you enter, a welcome contrast to the mess of thoughts in your head. You’re about to head down the hall to your dorm when you collide against someone. You huff an apology but when you feel their hand on your shoulder, you look up to see Theo. He looks intense, eyes wide and glinting with sharp determination and his mouth still set in that frown from earlier. “Sorry, Theo,” you say. “Didn’t see you there. Where are you going at this hour?”

“I was going to find you,” he replies. 

“Oh,” you say. “Well, here I am. Sorry, I’ve got to drop this stuff off and then—”

“Head to the Astronomy Tower,” he finishes for you, “to meet your ‘secret admirer.’” 

You don’t like the way he sneers at the last part of his sentence or the way he uses air quotations. You’re about to respond when he says, “Don’t go.”

“What?”

“Don’t go,” he repeats.

“Why not?”

He pauses before saying, “What if it’s someone just having a laugh?”

You bristle, hurt, and you feel your temper flare. “Is it so damn hard to believe that someone might actually have a crush on me?”

Theo laughs, razor-sharp and incredulous, as if he can’t believe that you’re saying something so outrageous, ��No, it’s not.”

“Then why shouldn’t I go?”

“Because I don’t want you to!”

“For Salazar’s sake, Theo, you can’t tell me what to do!”

“I know that!”

“Then are you trying to tell me not to go?”

“Because I bloody like you!”

Your heart stutters to a stop. You can only hear the sounds of both of your labored breathing and you suddenly can’t meet his eyes, trying your best to wrap your head around the fact that your feelings are reciprocated. “How long?’ you ask softly, holding your breath.

“Since first year.”

You blink. “Really?”

He rakes a hand through his hair and sighs heavily, “Mattheo’s right; you’re so oblivious.” There’s another beat of silence and he asks, a little shyly, “How do you feel?”

You can’t stop the smile that spreads across your face. “I like you too, Theo. I’ve liked you since first year as well.”

He echoes your “Really?” and it makes you giggle, “I guess we’re both oblivious.”

He joins your laughter and you let your forehead rest on his chest as your shoulders shake. When it dies down, Theo shifts you off him and lifts your chin with his forefinger, any semblance of coyness gone. You gaze into his ocean blue eyes. Salazar, you could drown in them. He offers a charming smile and he leans close, just a few centimeters away, and says, “Can I kiss you?”

Your eyelashes flutter and your voice comes out barely louder than a whisper, “I’d be disappointed if you didn’t.”

Your lips meet, fervent and desperate, years of yearning releasing like water through a broken dam. Theo hooks his arms around your waist, pulling you as close as possible. You wind your arms around his neck, fingers toying with the hair at his nape. He walks you backward, slipping his tongue into mouth as he crushes you up against the wall. He deepens the kiss and your knees go weak. 

Theo moves your bag off your shoulder and drops it on the floor. The letter that rested at the top of the pile of possessions falls out, laying forgotten on the ground.

[ebonysplendor]

Pulsatio Cordis Review

TL;DR: You know when you're talking to the person you've got a crush on, and, then, you turn into a certified dumbass and say something stupid? So, imagine that, except it's not you, but your crush, and your crush isn't saying anything stupid, but everything homicidal, and it's like, oh...mkaaaaaay. Suddenly, that weird thing that you said earlier ain't that weird anymore. Talk about awkward...

Game Link: https://lucia-lily.itch.io/pulsatio-cordis

Notable Features: Gender selection, Self-Insert, Affinity system, Multiple endings Spiciness: 0/5 -- It's definitely not innocent, but as far as spiciness? There wasn't any. It was lowkey kind've sweet, though, in an overlook all the red flags and fix him sort of way LI Red Flags: 4.5/5 -- Intense shifts in emotions, stalking, obsessive, drugged us, homicidal, manipulative, kidnapped us, forged a letter, planted evidence

Wanna know more? Well, let's get into it!

Yo. How's it going?

I'm gonna be real with y'all; I really don't feel like doing an intro lmao. Sometimes, I deadass don't know what to say, and I'm at a loss as to how to start it off. I also don't push myself to make an intro either so lol. I figure if I just be honest about it, it won't seem as lazy. Is that working?

Anyways, I think I was scrolling around on...Itch.io? Actually, I think this one came from here. I think I saw, like, a picture or something... Anyways, I discovered this game, and it was pretty solid! I'll get more into it later, but just as a whole, pretty damned solid!

I feel like I should mention something, though. This review has been done for like...weeks now, but I was making a post that kind've goes along with this, and it wasn't done and still isn't, so I never posted this lmao. It was honestly a "hear me yap more" type thing, because there was an aspect of this game that was super interesting, and I couldn't help myself.

...Okay, now, I really don't know what else to say so, we're just gonna jump right in. As always, I'll tell you as much about the game as possible without spoiling the game itself. That being said, let's take advantage of my lack of yappin' and get into it.

So boom.

Let me just cut to the chase: we are down bad for this hottie at school named Liev Lavanté. Like, bro, even his last name is hot. Could you imagine having a last name like that? That was a trick question, because we've already pictured us getting married and living together and being so domestic together with the cooking and the hugs from behind and siiiiiiiiiigh~ <3

Anyways, he's absolutely perfect in every way possible. He's super smart, super popular, super charming, super attractive, super...well, super everything. I point that out, because, aside from there being a massive amount of competition, the main issue is that he is, very clearly, way out of our league, but yolo right? Right. Not to mention that the worse possible thing that could happen was us getting shut down, so...? Fuck it, we ball, and, with that ball, we shoot our shot. Basketball references, am I right? Aha....ha....okay, anyways.

Actually, let me correct that. We kind've shooted out shot (shot our shot didn't hit the same, so it was necessary to be illiterate; just overlook it lmao). In actuality, we weren't that brave about it, but it still took us well out of our comfort zone to make a cheesy ass confession letter and shove it in his locker.

So, now, we're at home, anxious aye eff, because we were extremely bold and basically told this man that we wanted to slob his knob (not really, I'm just a degenerate) in writing, and we're mentally preparing to get rejected, cry it off this weekend, and move on wi-- wait.

Holy shit, wait--!!!!!

AH--!!

FOR A DATE, THOUGH, OR...??! FREE FOR WHAT???

OH M-- ALEXA!! PLAY THAT REMIX WITH BEYONCE IN IT BECAUSE

I.

AM ON.

TO SEE.

MY HUSBAND.

I'M HAPPEH. I'M HAPPEH. TO SEE. MY HUSBAND...until we weren't lmao. Yeeeeeeeeeah, let's dial it back and remember that this is one of those visual novels. Now, let me explain the issue.

So...there are times where Liev gets reeeeeally intense.

Like, insanely so, and, I don't think you guys understand what I mean (well, of course you don't, because you haven't played it yet. Duh moment. Anyways...); he's one of those people that either feels nothing, or he feels everything...sorta. Let me keep explaining.

So, one of the first things that we did was go out to eat, and, admittedly, the staff were struggling a bit, but it's all good, ya know, because we're with bae. Like, we're talkin' and vibin'. We're learning about him, he's learning about us, and we're just chillin'. Time goes by, and the waiter eventually comes out with our main dish, as expected.

Now, that sounds like something totally normal and innocent, right?

Yeah, no...apparently it wasn't, because Liev was really pissed off about that waiter interrupting our conversation.

What makes this more off-putting is that, not only did he highkey blow up about the waiter, but he started saying some pretty dark stuff. Now, mind you! We just confessed to this man and are having our first real conversation with him, and he's coming out of the woodwork with this stuff. Like, Liev was saying that he was in love with us and how everyone could burn in hell and that he wants to hold us but also murder everyone in the room and--

Like, bro, it just kept going...but then he stops and returns to normal conversation like the conversation hadn't ever not been normal. Like, oh...m'kay ._.

Naturally, this kind've puts us off...like, a lot. Actually, this puts us off so much that we've gone into survival mode. Like, we're literally just trying to get through the date without triggering Liev and getting ourselves killed. Now, this seems like a simple enough task, but, aside from the fact that it's never that easy in games like these, it's a guessing game as to what would actually make Liev flip or not.

Like, are stuffed animals the trigger?

Is it holding his hand?

Is it when we've finally had enough and ignore him?

Like, what makes Liev go from being okay to being not okay? It's literally a matter of life or death to know these things, because Liev is not beyond confrontation.

So, it'd be best to tread lightly, or it could get really violent, really fast.

So! Not bad! Pretty damned solid game!

It definitely wasn't one of my favorites, like, story or yandere-wise, but holy hell, was it one of my favorites clinical-wise! The way that it's clearly laid out that, "No, he's not just some random psycho and a bad person; he's legitimately mentally ill and is in serious need of help" was sooooo satisfyingly done. Now, admittedly, it was a lil' obvious here and there, but it wasn't bad!

Designs of the characters were cute, we had an MC with darker skin, which is, personally, always exciting to see, and the flow of the story was done really well, in my opinion! There were times where it'd go from, like, 0 - 75, sometimes 100, without warning, but it actually made sense as to why it'd happen like that, which was fantastically implied and lowkey laid out.

Anyways, I honestly don't have too much else to say about it, except that I really enjoyed the mental health aspect of it. I loved it so much, I couldn't help but do that thing that I tend to do and diagnose Liev. Lol if you want to see me ramble more about that in depth, you can check that out...whenever I actually post it lmao; it's a work in moderate progress at the moment ^^;

To get back on track though, I recommend a casual playthrough! It's the right duration for the story that's being provided, there's multiple endings, which is always interesting, and Liev is a lil' cutie...even though, I really wish that he was at least drinking age. Something about-- well, for the sake of potential spoilers, I'll just say that I don't like that Liev was out here collecting scholarships. Like, that just gave me full ick lmao. It was my fault, though, because had I actually read the game page and not said "Ooh, he's cute and the page is in pink! <3", then I would've saw how it said big as shit that

and

Like, there was no reason for me to be shocked by mentions of him getting scholarships and shit lmao. I literally just had to read.

Okay, wait, no, stop; I got off track. ANYWAYS lol. Me recommend game. Game solid. Game make me go "Damn...that actually kind've sucks, and I feel bad...". Game might make you go "Damn...that actually kind've sucks, and I feel bad...", too. All right! Now with that finally being said, I invite you to go to the dev's page, and tell them, "Hey! You did a good job here! When's the next game dropping? I'll be first in line for it, because I want you to keep doing the thing!". I'm sure that'll make them feel all warm and fuzzy and proud.

That's pretty much it! This review was a little scattered, huh? Well, I'm sure it's all right, because I'm finally done yappin'. The link for the game is right here, and, if you wanted to see the therapist side of me and hear me yap about Liev's potential diagnosis, keep a look out for that post. It'll be posted...eventually lmao. That's honestly why it took me so long to post this rambley review, because the plan was to put them out together, but it was nearing towards the end of the month, and you already knew that I wasn't going to let an entire month go by without posting something. Better yet, I try really hard not to.

Anyways, the biggest preesh for getting this far! Please, please, please remember to drink water, don't be dumb, and hope to see you around~!

Pulsatio Cordis

[charmixpower]

JFJAKDJSJDJABDJSJDBSKXJSHSJWKAJFHQKWJSBSKQKSNNEJWK!!!! OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU ARE SPOILING ME!!!!!!

LOOK AT THEM!!!! LOOK AT HER GOTH LITTLE OUTFIT OH MY GODDDDDD!!!!! ITS SO WELL STYLED!!!!! SHE LOOKS SO CUTE!!!

AND YOU DREW RIVEN'S LITTLE FRONT STANDS!!!! AND HIS EYEBROW PIERCING!!!!! I AM SCREAMING!!!!!!

you ever feel like maybe you're seeing double

@charmixpower are you ever not correct <3

[crunchietoast]

ᶜᵒᵒᵏⁱᵉˢ & ᶜᵒʷᵇᵒʸˢ| ʲ.ᵐ

Pairings: pre-outbreak Joel Miller x fem!reader

Word Count: 2883 (✨Including Bonus Scene✨)

Summary: You loved days like this. Days sitting on his couch in the dark living room of your neighbour’s house. Yes, that's right, you were spending your Saturday afternoons on your neighbour’s couch on a rainy day. But the term neighbour might be a little insensitive after all he was more than any other neighbour you have ever had.

Warnings: implied NSFW, cheesy cowboy books, Tommy being a little shit, eating; cookies and popcorn, mentions of shirtless Joel, swearing, FlirtyJoel™️, use of Y/N unfortunately, low-key cowboy kink, most likely writing errors leave meh alone :') (lemme know if there are any more <3)

You loved days like this. Days sitting on the couch in the dark living room of your neighbour’s house. Yes, that's right, you were spending your Saturday afternoons on your neighbour’s couch on a rainy day. But the term neighbour might be a little insensitive after all he was more than any other neighbour you have ever had.

Since you moved in next door, you and Joel have become very close and spend a lot of time together. You hate to be cliché, but you have grown especially fond of him, more than neighbours should, or even more the friends should. Yep, that's right you had a huge fat crush on the boy next door. But the boy next door wasn't actually a boy, in fact he was a man, a very single man that just so happened to be a loving father, and as you have recently found out, someone very cozy to share a blanket with.

You and Joel’s friendship was interesting to say the least. You two were flirty, very flirty, but you both knew the line and tiptoed on the edge; never dare crossing it. Being close with Joel was just easy, you knew what one another needed.

For example, crying at his front door, face smothered in his shoulder after a hard day. You knew he’d be there. No questions asked but the silence was loud enough. Comforting in a way.

He has made it very clear you were welcome over any time but Sarah on the other hand, uses a tactic you like to call broad-line trickery. You really couldn't say no to her puppy dog eyes when she begged you to stay over for movie night.

“C'mon Y/N! Dad doesn't cook the popcorn like you do!” she pleaded, knowing full well you and Joel made the popcorn the exact same way.

“Well if you insist,” you playfully rolled your eyes and making eye contact with Joel, acting as if it were a chore to be around the adorable curly hair girl and her absolute DILF of a dad.

Joel scoffed and rolled his eyes back as he chucked Sarah’s bedding on the couch that she insisted on having to make a blanket fort with.

“Only if you're Dad says it okay though.” You say again with a smile on your face. Sarah exclaimed in joy.

“Okay with it? Pft! Dad would make you move in if you'd let him” Sarah made sly eyes at Joel as his eyes widened before he threw a pillow at his daughter.

“Okay, that's enough! If you want Y/N to stay you better go get more blankets and pillow, hurry up or the pizzas gonna come and you’re not gonna get any…” Joel teased as he picked up the home phone from the coffee table. Sarah ran upstairs with loud thumps you and Joel chuckled quietly.

“Move in huh?” You battered your eyes.

“You shush girl, or no pizza for you either” he narrows his eyes at you.

So yes, you loved sitting on his couch on a cold rainy day more than anything. You two didn't even need to talk really, simply sitting on the couch with your legs laid on top of his lap as you read a book, his thumb gently rubbing your ankle where your sweatpants and socks don't exactly meet as he watches whatever is on the tv on a quiet volume.

Some would think you’re a couple, which in all honestly would make sense, but nope. Neither of you says anything for fear of ruining the comfortable abode you’ve made yourself. So, sitting here will have to do for now.

“When is Sarah gonna be back?” You asked glancing up from your cheesy cowboy novel.

“Why? My company not enough?” he pretended to be offended and you giggled and shook your head as your eyes rolled, “she’s gettin’ dropped off at Tommy’s tonight, she wanted to have a slumber party with her uncle apparently. Gon’ get him to tell her all bout’ his date on Tuesday” he deadpanned. You chuckled slightly at the thought of Tommy and Sarah having a ‘slumber party’, you can imagine it now, Sarah braiding his hair as he rants and swoons about the pretty girl he just went on a date with. “He better keep it PG, don’t want Sarah coming home tellin’ me all about how Uncle Tommy just got laid” he said, which only made you laugh louder, head thrown back against the arm rest of the couch.

“Now that would be hilarious” you said as you stood up from the couch, throwing the fluffy blanket and book onto the couch next to Joel as you walked to the kitchen.

“Yeah,” you heard him scoff from the living room as you got a bag of popcorn out of the cabinet. “For you. I’ll be the one that has to give Sarah the talk unless you wanna give it a go Darlin'” He laughed loudly at the thought.

“I’ll leave it to you, thanks” you say sheepishly as you pressed the buttons on the microwave, then grabbing a cookie from the jar above the microwave, which are surprisingly still here. Joel and Tommy love the cookies that you and Sarah make, they never usually last a week.

A few seconds past with nothing but the sound of the popcorn popping, the TV on low volume and the heavy rain hitting the windows and roof outside. It was peaceful.

“His hands were rough, just like she imagined. Real hard-working hands must be from all horse riding and heavy lifting he’s been doing she thought to herself. Those same hands now moved down her body slowly,” You heard Joel say from the living room.

‘What in the world is he on abo-’

Your book. He’s reading your book.

“What’s a pretty lady like you doing not getting touched the way she shoul-” he continued.

“JOEL NO! PUT IT DOW-” you ran into the living room diving onto the couch scrambling to get the book from his grasp. His laughter boomed loudly as he held the book out of her reach.

“Is this what you've been readin’ all this time sweetheart? Paper porn?” Joel laughs loudly as you’re still trying to reach the book, climbing all over him in the hopes of getting it back.

“Joel! give it back, it’s not what it looks like!” you said smacking his chest with a bright red face.

“Oh baby, I think it’s exactly what it looks like, see the page was even dog eared,” his laugh only getting louder as you straddle his lap, pulling at his arm that’s in the air with the book.

“No fair Joel, give it back!” you whine as he laughs slow down.

“Alright Alright girl, calm down,” his hand comes up to grab at your wrist that’s trying to get the book. You glare at him crossing your arms with your hand, that Joel was holding, out waiting the return of your precious book. “Oh, don’t look at me like that, here’s ya porn-” you jab the side of his ribs “OW! - okay okay here’s your…literature” he said finally handing the book to you as you snatch it out of his grasp, holding it tightly against you, the glare remaining.

“Cowboys really do it for you?” Joel askes curiously.

“Shut up, didn’t your Momma ever teach you not to touch what isn't yours? Or did you just not listen, hm?” You said pulling his ear gently to add emphasise to your words. Joel grabbed at your wrist again.

“Oh no Darlin, don’t worry I listen real well.” he said smirking as your face burned.

“Dick.” you scoffed, slapping his shoulder with the book before getting off of Joel, trying to ignore the fact you realised you were sitting on him a few seconds ago. Joel just laughed.

“Yeah Yeah, now would you be an angel go get the popcorn for your handsome rugged cowboy?” Joel said reaching for the TV remote nonchalantly.

“Ughh, I hate you” you whine throwing a pillow at his head as you walk back to the kitchen placing the book on the counter, away from Joel, and emptied the popcorn from the microwave into a bowl.

“Where's the book?” Joel asked as you sat back down on the couch, your legs bent with your cold feet under his thigh in hopes of some warmth, bowl of buttery popcorn in hand.

“I’m going to burn it.” You say dead serious as you tug the blanket back over you, Joel shuffling under as well, munching on handful of popcorn.

“What?!” He groaned “I was really getting into it” He continued, smirking as you glared at him again.

“I’ll buy you one for your birthday.” you say still serious as you smack his arm coming to pinch at your chin affectionately.

“Na, why would you do that when we can just read it together, huh? Go on off you go, get the book” he said throwing his arm on the backrest of the couch and shooing you away with his other hand.

Bright red covers you from you neck to the tip of your ears at the thought of reading a dirty book with Joel. With him.

“Absolutely not. There is no way in hell I’m reading that book near you ever again, let alone with you!” You said throwing a piece of popcorn at him. Joel laughs.

“Don't let me ruin it for you, I’m sure you were really into it. Up to the best part of it as well” Joel replies, chuckling as you shove your face into the pillow you grabbed from behind you, groaning loudly.

“You’re such an idiot, I’m never making cookies for you again!” you threaten as your face is still shoved in the pillow.

Joel grabbed behind you knees and pulled you closer to him, so your legs laid over his lap completely, you squealed into the pillow. He put his hands on your waist where your his hoodie had rod up and started to tickle, your head shot out from the pillow and screeched bloody murder as you tried to wiggle from his gasp.

“Don’t be so mean to your cowboy, he loves eating his girls’ cookies!” he said as he continued the assault.

“Joel stop!” you squealed again between words as he just kept pulling you closer every time you managed to crawl away. “Let me go!!” you're screams began mixing with uncontrollable laughter.

“Na-uh girly, you’re not going anywhere. I will not hesitate to lasso you up!” Joel kept the cowboy joke going because he loved the reaction it got out of you. And this, for one was definitely a reaction.

You laughed harder, the joke now becoming more funny than embarrassing. Still embarrassing of course but funny too now.

“Pl-please! I-I can’t!” you screamed as tears welled at the corner of your eyes from the laughter. Joel was laughing loudly as well, showing dimple on his right cheek that you loved so much.

His fingers finally stopped moving and your laughing slowed down, you opened your eyes to Joel’s shit eating grin pasted all over his face. He was sitting on his heels now, facing you, between your thighs as your legs were over his thighs and down by his sides. His hands on the couch, either side of your hips to hold himself up.

You’re smile hurt your cheeks and the tears from laughter rolled down the side of your face. Joel was quick to wipe them away with his thumb.

“Fine I’ll make more cookies.” you say quietly, like a whisper for only him to hear.

“Promise?” Joel whispered back as his smile went gentle.

“Promise.”

The words felt like they had more meaning than they lead on. Like it wasn’t about cookies, or cowboys. Like you were promising something more than his favourite home baked goods. And it felt okay. You didn't know what it was at the moment but whatever it was, it felt okay.

“Good.” Joel concluded. “Can’t live without em’” he said as his thumb gently touched your waist again.

“Me either” you giggled.

This definitely wasn't about cookies or cowboys.

✨Bonus scene✨

WC: 846

“Yes, the bear with the blue ribbon, I got it! Just stay in the car, won’t be long girly!” Tommy called out to the car as he walked into the kitchen from the back door.

“Hi Tommy, whacha doin?” you asked him as you stood at the stove pulling out another tray of cookies, as Joel ate the rest.

“Hiya sweets, just picking up a few things for Sarah she forgot. Apparently, she can’t live without em’ for even a day,” he said as he looked around the kitchen “where is Joel at?”

“Oh, he’s in the shower, shouldn't be too long” you said as you took the oven mites off your hands, chucking them on the bench next to the stove.

“You guys been behaving?” Tommy smirked as he wiggled his eyebrows at you. You rolled your eyes at him and ignored the blush on your cheeks.

“We always do” you smiled at him with a warning eye, that if he were to ask again you would hit him with a wooden spoon. He got the idea.

“Hey Darlin’ do you have my shir-” Joel said as walked into the kitchen as soon as he saw Tommy he huffed and leaned against the counter.

Oh, you forgot to mention, shirtless as well. Since you were indeed wearing his shirt. Why you ask? Don’t.

“What are you doing here?” Joel asked Tommy bluntly.

“Hello to you too brother,” Tommy said smiling slyly at the sight of you wearing said shirt, Joel not wearing said shirt and…wait what’s that, a book on the counter? “Just picking up some stuff for Sarah, the girl really needs a bear with a blue ribbon apparently”.

“Armchair in the Living room on the right” you said as you walked into the laundry room near the kitchen, grabbing Joel a new shirt.

“Thanks” Tommy said as he walks closer to the counter with the book. Joel is so distracted to by the cookies that just came out of the oven, attempting to make it look like he’s not drooling as he stood near the stove top with the tray on top, that he doesn’t even notice Tommy looking at the book.

“’Save a horse, Ride a cowboy’?” Tommy read the cheesy book cover out loud as he picked it up.

You rushed back into the kitchen throwing the new shirt at Joel’s face as he wiped around from the stove top to get to Tommy as well.

“NO!” You both said in unison. Somehow Joel got there first and snatched the book out of his brothers’ hands. Tommy was extremely confused, it took a bit for the book title and the reaction of you both to process, but when it did, and he knew what the book was most likely about a huge smirk smeared disgustingly over his face.

“A cowboy book?” Tommy said as Joel and your faces went red. Joel fiddling with the cover of the pages.

“It’s Joel’s!” you said quickly. Joels eyes instantly went wide as he panned his head towards you. His grip on the book tightens. Tommy looked between the both of you.

“No, it’s not! Y/N, its hers she loves cowboys!!” Joel shouted whipping his head to Tommy as if he was a kid caught stealing candy. He swung his head back over to you with eyebrows furrowed and jaw swingling open. “How DARE you.” He emphasized the word dare.

“Joel it’s okay, your allowed to like what you like. Nothing to be ashamed off.” You smirked at him as you (fake) empathetically patted his shoulder. See how he likes it.

“Okayyyy…. Well, I’ll leave you to cookie making” he pointed to you, “And I’ll leave you, dear brother, to cowboy readin’” tommy said patting the shoulder of Joel. You kept in the snort of laughter as Joel once again snapped his head to his brother, glaring firmly at the younger man. Tommy nods at the both of you and walked backwards to the Livingroom to finally get the bear Sarah wanted.

“You little shit.” Joel said looking over to your sheepish smile. His eye twitched as you shrugged your shoulder and giggled guiltily.

“What? You did say you loved the book…” you said, still smiling, as you picked up the shirt you threw at Joel in the struggle and dusted it off before handing it to him with both hands.

Joel snatched the shirt and tossed the book back onto the counter, aggressively pulled the shirt over his head.

“Tommy, did you find the bear?” Joel asked keeping his glare on you.

“Uh… Yep! found it right he-” Tommy said from the Livingroom.

“Great. Get out.” Joel said firmly. Tommy got the hint and began pacing for the backdoor again.

“No! Tommy please don’t leave, here have a cooki-”

“Bye Y/N!! Goodluck!” He said as the door closed behind him. Your eyes went back to Joel’s which had yet to stop staring. Joel waited until he hears Tommy’s truck drive away.

‘Those cookies better be the best damn things I’ve ever eaten. Or you’re screwed.”

[kharrisdawndancer]

DWC Nove '24 - Day 4 - Surrender/Tranquil - Tinnaire

Dornogal was an interesting city. Nahilvi had said she hadn’t liked it at the start--too blocky and hard for her. Tinnaire had liked it from the start, but could appreciate Nahi’s viewpoint. It was hard. It was straight lines and stone. But there were so many charming butterfly gardens. And they watered the sheep in one of the courtyards. Tinnaire couldn’t help but be charmed by that. There were flowers and moss and natural hot springs! And a large forge that rang out at all hours, similar to Ironforge. There was magma visible in places. And there were crystalline art structures and sentimental memorials.

Tinnaire sat on a fence, watching the tenders spray down the rocky sheep and their mossy wool. Butterflies ambled aimlessly between brightly colored flowers that dripped from bushes even druidic gardeners would envy. There was the hum of conversations just out of ear shot that added to the tranquil feeling around her. She tried to settle into it and let it affect her.

It wasn’t working. 

The others had told her it was all right, even normal, to be angry. And Tinnaire  was angry. But she didn’t want to be angry. She wanted to be aloof. Removed from it. Logical. She wanted to be elegant and mature. She wanted to be her usual optimistic, confident self. She wanted to be fine.

After all, who wanted to be heartsick?

Perhaps the anger was better. There was a large, fiery part of her that just wanted to surrender and scream at the top of her lungs. Or collapse into a heap and wilt like something melodramatic out of theatrical production. 

Or set something on fire.

Childish though it was, she _had_ done that last bit. So many origami rabbits had been sacrificed to the pyre of what felt like adolescent dramatics. But for a moment, there was small satisfaction.

He said he hadn’t realized how she’d felt. She could still hardly believe that. He’d said she was his _best_ friend. He couldn’t bear to lose the close relationship they’d shared. He’d been scared to try for fear of their possible failure. Rejection and embarrassment kept her shifting all the things she had wanted to say that summer day before she’d left with the mercenary crew. It had shifted everything else she’d wanted to say. Asking him to look in on her place had simply been a soothing favor to ask. To let him know she wasn’t abandoning him. She was looking out for his feelings again, when she should have been looking out for her own.

Yet, in all the months, he hadn’t reached out. Hadn’t had the kindness to warn her, even knowing how things had been left between them. It stung. His best friend that he cared so much about.

Tinnaire loosened her shoulders. Ash fell from her fingertips, singed from the edges of his most recent letter. No, that train of thinking wasn’t fair. Her eyes fell to the paper and the line that said he wanted to talk. What was there to talk about? He hadn’t done anything wrong. Hadn’t besmirched his or anyone else’s honor. She knew she wasn’t always responding logically--gods, it took her a shamefully long time to write the notes she’d sent. She didn’t want to make things worse than they were. But she also wasn’t going out of her way to make it any easier for him. Not again. They’d each take their lumps for the situation. At least he had some happiness in all of it. She was glad that they seemed smitten. He deserved that.

Anger was one of the stages, Fiorenze had said.

Maybe she could talk Talon into letting her off leave early. Work would be distracting. Tinnaire exhaled long and through her mouth before speaking to no one. “Okay. What’s after anger?”

@daily-writing-challenge

Mentions: @andaerosdawnflare

soft mentions: @nahisummerhold @lilyofporcelain @fio-renze

[kahvilahuhut]

🔍 cynosure status update

i mean. it's also periphery update too though. teehee. feel free to also check out the drawing here!

🤍 New to the story? Check out the (current) wip intros: Cynosure / Periphery

omg it's been a while, hasn't it? haha. i must admit i might have gotten A Bit too deep into some university assignments (+ my thesis). I do sometimes talk about the story on my main, too, but it's nothing that important for the story itself, mostly just some fun facts about the characters, which means that most of the development I've done is in my brain. Or is nonexistent or something. ANYWAY! Here's a status update to tell what has been happening lately! Might actually make this into something I post every now and then.

In this status update I'm going to talk a little about how it's going with the story, overall thoughts, plot/character changes and some things you can expect during next few weeks (hopefully). I'll put it all under the cut to keep this short on the dashboard 🥰

Like always, if you have any questions about the story, feel free to send an ask - I'll always be happy to answer 🤍

overall thoughts

Right now one of my top thoughts is honestly debating whether i want to, like, actually write this somewhere as a nove, or whether I should do it as a graphic novel or something. That said, if I do go with the latter, you can still expect writing bc I like to write things out to plan them. Or vise versa make some kind of sketches for writing. My brain works in a weird way, I know lol

I have been doing some worldbuilding (specifically for the story AND something for the overall story world that I have). Let me know if you'd love to hear some things I have thought about!

I've also been doing some research about *checks notes* Boston, MA. Because that's where most of the story happens :^) Though it happens in 2200's so I still have lots of room to change things around.

Definitely thinking about adding more dark/horror stuff in the world as a whole bc there's been, like, a climate crisis. AND people do interplanetary traveling. Stuff like that ought to lead to some fucked up stuff. Especially when there's megacorporations involved. Cynosure wise there's going to be something, especially in Periphery, happening to one of the main characters. 👀

plot/character updates

(that have happened lately, at least)

One of the pov characters kind of got a name update! Tobias's first name has been changed to Ripley, and it's what most characters will probably referring to it as. That said, some characters (+ itself) will refer to it as Tobias bc that's its preferred name that's somethings its friends and wife call it

Another pov character (Samuel) got an interesting change of backstory, some tweaks in personality, and its plot-revelant actions have changed a little. Sammy's changes has thus made some already existing things I've posted on here non-canon.

Slowly finally putting together what I mah want to have in Klara's chapters and it's sooooo exciting.

Polished some things about the plots, especially the different parts of the acts <3

Got more thoughts about the project itself (or, well, what it should have). That also means I need to look more into pharma research or something. Very interesting...

Overall, lots to think about and lots to research about.

things to expect in next few weeks

(that is, if I won't drown in university assignments or something)

I've had some ideas for little stories that would be happening before the story, to show more information about the characters and the story itself (like what happened in the original project). Or maybe just some fun parts of characters' backstories. So I may post something if I manage to write it!

Some more character introductions + pov character post. Might make a "tag yourself" meme. Or a powerpoint wip intro

Something else, maybe? If you have an idea, let me know!

taglist (interact with this post if you want to be added or removed!)

@ecofear @fashionablyfyrdraaca @shadowfells @volkihar

@antoncrane @kk7-rbs @void-botanist @the-inkwell-variable @artbyeloquent

[nearer-than-the-eye]

LITTLE SAINT

listen Ahi giustizia di Dio! tante chi stipa nove travaglie e pene quant’ io viddi? e perché nostra colpa sì ne scipa?

"Ah, Justice of God, who heaps up such strange punishment and pain as I saw there? and why do our sins so waste us?" For Santino D'Antonio: John Wick's bitter ex, my most beloved villain, and whose name means sacred or little saint.

___

John Wick 2 may have come out nearly a decade ago, but being a Santino girl is a chronic condition. Cover and track list images are details from Caravaggio's Bacchus, and the epigraph is from Canto VIII of Inferno, translated by Robert and Jean Hollander.

Some extended thoughts about my process and choice of epigraph and cover under the read more!

This playlist mostly started because I was listening to "Young Caesar 2000," said to myself, wow, this would be a great Santino song, and put it alone on a new playlist. From there, for about a year, I'd throw on anything that particularly reminded me of Santino, songs that felt, not like they described him, but that they might narrate part of his inner monologue and feeling. Some John/Santino vibes starting slipping in there (almost inevitably), but I knew I wanted to keep things really closely tied to how Santino understands himself. I narrowed things down, did some ordering for the overall arc and (hopefully) smooth transitions, and here we are!

Essential to my understanding of Santino (and thus this playlist's formation) is NeverwinterThistle's Unholy Union and asuralucier's The Man You Want to Be, both of which you should absolutely run, not walk, to read.

I'll let the tracklist mostly speak for itself, but I hopefully captured Santino's arrogance and the fundamental emptiness and deep insecurity that arrogance covers. I really do think John is something real and true for Santino, in a world full of posturing, but he eventually cannot resist instrumentalizing John, just like everyone else. JW 2 is one of the JW movies most pessimistic about masculinity (if not THE most pessimistic), and the arc of this playlist would certainly be very different without Mitksi's "I'm Your Man." Which is Mitski's most pessimistic song about masculinity! So it all works out.

The title -- The fact that Santino's name means "little saint" has fascinated me since my first cursory google search that delivered this factoid, and I've always kept it in my back pocket when thinking about Santino as a character. He's always the little brother. His petulance and pettiness is so essential to his character, and it's, of course, what makes him such a great foil to John (who imagines himself as a rational actor, but has his matching streak of the petulance). Santino inherits all this splendor, and all he can do is try and claw out more and more. A petty saint, and certainly never a god.

Why Bacchus? -- Well, I was trying to get a good film still for the cover and eventually gave up, so then I went to go find something appropriately aesthetic for a playlist cover. I was going to do a Dutch Golden Age still life bc that's what I'm writing about rn and lushness (and rot) is so essential to Santino, but then I was like. this guy is Italian. SUPER Italian. Who's an Italian with dramatic shadows and lush still lifes? And thus Caravaggio. Bacchus because revelry, excess, beauty, ect....also the invitation of the painting--he's holding out the goblet to you, asking you to join him. But mostly because it's beautiful.

Why Dante? -- I KNEW this bitch had to have an epigraph from Inferno once I realized this was going to be a real playlist. I mean, speaking of pessimism! The Divine Comedy feels so crazy to read as a modern reader bc it's like. yeah all this suffering is God's perfect justice. That guy eating his own shit is part of the divine plan. Which, to me, lines up really well with my read on masculinity in the JW movies--perfect, unchangeable, and committing you to endless suffering.

Alright, let's really get into it. This tercet ("Ah, Justice of God, who heaps up / such strange punishment and pain as I saw there? / and why do our sins so waste us?") come early in Canto 7, as Virgil and Dante (our POV character and protagonist) leave the third circle of Hell, Gluttony, and enter the fourth circle, Avarice and Prodigality ("Why do you squander...Why do you hoard" is probably the most famous quote from this circle). If Santino was to end up anywhere, it would be in one of those two circles, so I enjoy that this is the point in the text Dante asks these two questions!

Speaking of: despite God's perfection, Dante sure loves to question what he sees in hell and then...not resolve those questions in any way. It's interesting to see that "who heaps up / such strange punishment and pain as I saw there?" is a question addressed to the "Justice of God" when. well. the Justice of God is the thing heaping up these strange punishments and pain!

Dante seems unaware of the paradox, here, which has a real resonance for me in the way Santino is just like, well, I HAVE to blow up your house, John! I HAVE to put out a hit on you after you fulfill the marker, John! But to point to the times he acted out of compassion (not calling in John's marker during his retirement) would completely undermine that logic. It says "there are some things more important than power," but if Santino acknowledged that, then he wouldn't be able kill his sister.

Dante can't walk through hell and say with his whole chest, "I don't think it should be like this, actually" and still trust and love God, so he doesn't. Santino can't believe "more power will make me more happy, our culture says so," and also consciously acknowledge that it's the culture under the Table (and his father!!! his god!!!) that has pitted him against his sister his whole life, that has instilled in him values that ultimately leave him empty. So he doesn't! And he dies trapped in that paradox.

And then that second question. "And why do our sins so waste us?" UGH. ugh. Dante. You fucking hit me hard with this one. This is the line that made me choose this tercet. There's so much to Santino, so much beauty, so much divinity--but our sins waste us. All that power is used only in pursuit of more power, and, in the end, he's destroyed by that pursuit. The first two lines of the tercet key into culture and the way we contort our selves to fit into culture, but this last line is just an exclamation of the tragedy. Why? we ask, and nobody answers.