#“who has the potential to be something more and who is destined to be just a background character”

[lostbetweenvampiresandmusic]

Hello! I was wondering if you could do headcanons for TLB (poly) with a gyaru reader? Like what would their opinion be. Specifically the newer styles like tsuyome or Amekaji! I can also DM you pictures for reference :D tysm!!

Hi! Thanks so much for the ask - I hope you'll like this!

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Soulmates are destined, and the thing about soulmates is that you can not pick them yourselves. The boys had sometimes - on the rare moments they felt the need to talk about the fact that there was a fifth potential pack member waiting for them somewhere outside - talked about what their final mate would be like.

David was certain that they'd be bold and somewhat brash, fitting in with them nicely.

Paul, however, was convinced their mate would be a more quiet yet even more lethal counterpart to them.

Dwayne didn't necessarily have any expectations, he just hoped you'd be yourself an not some kind of poser.

Marko was absolutely certain that you'd be very similar to all of them, dressing alternatively, causing chaos and thriving in it.

At first glance, all of them were wrong. They saw you, the foundation shade on your face a couple of shades to dark. Your hair died brown, wearing preppy clothes - honestly, they didn't know what to think.

That was until they realised that this wasn't just wearing these clothes. You came from a culture where neatness and social conformity were standards, and by wearing this, you actively stood against that. It was a new idea for them that anti fashion could look so - well, normal - in comparison to their styles.

Once they get to know you and get why you chose this style to be yours, they'll be more open to it and to learn more about it.

Surprisingly, it is Marko who embraces your looks first, knowing exactly what kind of trinkets you'd like to accessorise an outfit. Oftentimes, he makes something for you, but sometimes the two of you will wander the boardwalk, and he'll just see something that would absolutely compliment your style. He would absolutely melt if you bought or made him something in return.

Paul is next, wanting to know more about your make-up. He learns how to do eyeshadow and eyeliner and manages to recreate your everyday make-up rather easily. He loves taking those moments to chat with you and getting to know you better. You talk about everything, but he is glad to know you are a big music lover too.

Dwayne absolutely respects your style and the fact that it is absolutely you - he just doesn't necessarily understand it. He loves that you love it. He loves that it makes you happy - but in all honesty, he has some difficulties separating your style with the preppy style of certain girls on the boardwalk. It takes some time before he knows the difference and realises why your style is different from theirs.

David is surprised to see that their mate is a polar opposite style wise, but he immediately likes your attitude. You wear what you want, not giving a damn. You are unapologetically you, and for that, he can only respect you.

They would love to see you in their style one day, if only for a moment or two.

But besides that, after getting used to it, they like your styles.

[thatonecrookedsmile]

The Ink Demonth 2024:

-Tea-

-----

I got distracted by watching a stream in the middle of painting this, so this thing is coming out a... little later than I wanted. Also no quote at the beginning because I'm out of ideas.

'Tea' is a pretty simple prompt so there wasn't much I could do other than something just… simple. I didn't really have a clue who to use for this prompt though, but I ended up going with Emma Lamont from Boris and the Dark Survival. Long time since I last drew her.

Looking at other people's entries, I realized that using Betty would have made more sense and I'm surprised I didn't consider her sooner, but at the end of the day I'm okay with the choice I went with because in the end I'm giving the spotlight to a character I haven't seen people talk about in a long time.

Remember Emma? I wouldn't be surprised if one didn't. Heck, I can't even lie, she's not a character I think about often. I went to look at her tag, and that tag in the last 3 years only had 3 "recent" posts between 2021 and 2023 (except, of course, mine). Plus,her small appearance in BATDS doesn't help much. The last time I touched on her design was 2 years ago, on a sketch of her that I never finished (funnily enough, a sketch I was using for the purpose of redesigning her). I took what I had done (head/face/hair), dusted it off, and just expanded the idea a bit. It's not much, and probably not very accurate for a "1940s English Dance Teacher", but I doubt I'll go back to this design any time soon,and I don't know what else I could add in her design. (maybe earrings, I don't know)

With all that in mind, I don't have a problem with Emma. Kind of indifferent to her at the end of the day, but she has her place in the franchise, one that at the end of the day,it doesn't hurt to pay attention to again. And I find her story kind of funny. Another one being a victim of not being given a proper workspace/office of her own, and forced to create new dance steps in a bathroom. I like to think that she and Jack "I Write Better Lyrics In The Sewers" Fain had some kind of friendship. I've had an animatic idea since 2020 that adapts Jack's audio from BATDS and she was included. I never made it,though.

I kind of doubt we'll hear more of her in the Lone Wolf update. Her existence in the game seems like it was just a way to justify why we're suddenly collecting dance steps inside toilets, and I kind of doubt they'll expand on her beyond that. A shame. But then again, LW hasn't released it yet, and it's promised to add lots of new stuff, so who knows what could happen,I guess.

Somewhat related to the topic(s), what's your opinion on tea? As far as I remember, I've never tried it. And to be honest, I don't think I've ever been curious to try it. Is it good? Is it worth trying? This prompt got me thinking about it. I doubt I'll try it eventually, but I guess it doesn't hurt to ask, right?

[cherry-leclerc]

reckless driver ☆ mv1

genre: photographer!reader, angst, moody!max, yearning, jos hate club

word count: 9.9k

Switching to be Max’s personal photographer wasn’t a planned note on your agenda. Neither was him opening up. A lot of things weren’t, therefore, making his growing crush on you catch him completely off guard. 

inspired by reckless driving, lizzy mcalpine !

cherry here!...would it be a regular cherry fic if it didn’t hurt ya just a little bit?

 All he knew was how to be perfect.

It has nothing to do with his looks, doesn’t even mean this in a condescending way. The perfect shade of watercolor eyes. The perfect mix of dirty blond hair. The perfect color of pink that taints his lips. The perfect curve of his nose. This had nothing to do with that. 

For fucks sakes, Max! Jos grits his teeth tightly, marching closer and closer. The accelerator is there for a reason! 

From a very early age, Max’s vocabulary grew an excessive amount, but again, it mainly had to do with how many curse words he could count based on angry verses his dad would often spit at him. By the time he was five, he knew them all, and he knew them by heart. Something inside of him became almost immune to all of that. The hurtful comments, the hatred behind his eyes, the annoyance of not being the best. There was nothing he couldn't handle. And if he remembers well enough, then he can still vividly hear the conversation between his parents. 

Just one more, Sophie. Maybe then, if we’re lucky, we’ll have another boy. One that actually has potential.

He swore to be the greatest in that very moment. No matter how much he wanted to give up, he never would. Not when he was constantly put down by his own father, or when the nerves ate him alive, making his skin crawl—no. He wouldn’t give into being a failure. Wouldn’t satisfy them ever.

So, he prayed. He prayed every single night for the new baby on the way to be anything but another boy. Let it be a girl, let it be an alien, let it be anything but a boy. Because even though he was just a kid, he knew that if there was another opportunity for Jos to train another son of his, he’d take it, and Max would be left as some unfinished project. 

And lo and behold—it was a girl.

He never really knew true happiness until that very moment. He cried a whole lot when he first held Victoria and everyone thought it was adorable, but no one knew just how much this meant to Max. He would continue to be his father’s main focus, and that’s all that mattered. He would craft himself to be the winner he knew he needed to be in order to get a solid smile from him, even just once. Either way, a few years later his parents wound up getting a divorce, so all was good.

Now, at this very moment—he had finally done it. 

Being a World Champion felt the way he knew it would: unreal.

Yes, the fireworks and the cheers were a part of that, but the warm hug from Jos was what really made it all worth it. All the snarky comments, all the panic attacks, all the isolation growing up—it was all worth it.

That’s a good boy! Jos yelled, rustling his sweaty hair before grinning widely. That’s how you do it! 

He wishes to remember this moment until the day he dies, and hopefully, if he's lucky enough, a bit after that. Whatever the case might be, he’s content, but now there’s something new.

Higher expectations.

You were born to be the greatest, Max. You were destined to outbeat those who are stupid enough to think they have a chance against you. They don't. No they fucking don’t because you, Max Verstappen, are one hell of a lion. Jos takes a sip of champagne, swallowing harshly and not at all quietly. And you wouldn’t want to fuck that up, now would you?

The answer is no. No way in hell would he let his father’s affection slip away. Not when he’s been dreaming of it for so long. He’s worked—and he’s worked hard—for this. There’s nothing, nor anyone, who would matter as much as Jos Verstappen and being the best driver there could ever be.

But then—just then.

You came along.

-

You should have said no. Looking back at it now, you really should have said no.

And yet. You couldn’t have possibly known that from the very beginning. 

Funny enough, you started off as Checo’s photographer. You loved it. He was easy to work with. Not only was he nice to you, but so was his family. The work environment was healthy and fun. Your dream job, really, there was nothing to complain about. 

But one by one, from a nearby corner—always a nearby corner—you watched as Max’s photographers rapidly lost their minds and quit. It’d start off with a scowl from him and end with a huff from them, dropping their expensive cameras and leaving without sparing a second glance. 

It isn’t until photographer number eight where things really do take an unexpected turn.

For you. 

“What do you say?” Christian’s voice booms with need. 

You blink hazily. “I-I’m not too sure. I mean, Checo and I work so well together…”

“No, I know what—and trust me, I feel bad for doing this—but we’re really counting on you. You get along with everyone. Everyone loves you! Who’s to say Max won’t?”

“And what if he doesn’t?” you fight back. “Then what? I quit too?”

“First of all, he will. And second of all, that won’t be necessary because he’ll love you.”

“You’re that confident?”

“I am.”

You sigh, rolling your tired neck before looking back at him. “Well, I’m not. I need to think this through.”

The Red Bull principal nods. “Of course! You need time, of course. But please—you’d be helping us all. Especially Max.”

You’d be a liar if you were to say that his words hadn’t stuck with you. What did he mean by ‘especially Max’? Was it to get the wheels spinning? If it was, then it was definitely working.

Adjusting your camera strap that hangs around your neck, you stare off into the distance as if you might find the answer somewhere in between the clouds. And maybe you did find it. The answer, you mean. You were one hundred percent certain now that you wanted to stay with Checo, you just didn’t know how to break the news to Christian who has done so much for you ever since you started working at Red Bull.

“I heard about the offer,” a deep voice rumbles next to you, making you jump with fear, clutching your camera towards your chest like some sort of secret weapon. The Dutchman remains unbothered, taking in the same sunset as you once were. “Christian tends to do that. Put people on the spot. I hate that about him.”

In a way, you’re sort of surprised by him even speaking to you or that he even knows about your existence. Over the past few years, you’ve only interacted with him a couple of times. Once, when he won his first championship. Twice, when he won his second. And thrice, when he won his, well…third. And they were all due to the awkward congratulatory hug you felt yourself forced to give since everyone around you was doing the same. 

Other than that, you had no reason to cross paths with him despite working for the same team. You two always stayed on opposite sides of the paddock, but it was never intentional, it was just the way things played out. Until now.

“You really shouldn’t say you hate the man who's making your dreams come true,” you whisper, struggling to find your own voice. 

Max hums. “All I said was that I hate that about him, not that I hate him as a person.” A beat. “And for your information, he isn’t the one making my dreams come true—I am.”

“He gave you a chance—”

“A chance he knew someone else would have taken if it weren’t him.” That shuts you right up, silence lingering. Seeing as you both were standing on the terrace overlooking the paddock, you two watched as Christian and Checo converse with one another, hands on their hips like some kind of businessmen. “I worked hard to get to where I am, so please, don’t give him all the credit when we both know that's not true.”

More silence. “Listen, I think I’m going to—”

“Turn him down and continue working with Checo?”

Your voice catches. “W-what?”

The Dutchman clicks his tongue, like he’s got you all figured out. Three conversations over the past three years and he thinks he has you all figured out? 

“I can’t say I blame you. You don’t think we’ll work well together, and quite frankly, I would agree. We wouldn’t. You’re too…nice.”

You have to laugh. “Is that supposed to be an insult?” 

“It’s supposed to be the truth,” he’s ricochets.

Turning towards his tall frame, you huff, hair washing over your face before faking a tight smile. “And you’re too…complicated.” Something about the way his gaze darkens at your words makes you want to back down like some shivering dog, but miraculously, you remain still. “And that’s not a compliment.”

“Didn’t sound like one.”

“Well because it’s not.”

He’s not too far from you, and honest to God, that made you shake more than you intended. There was something about him—there always was. Even though you never really worked close to him, you knew there was something there, hiding between the crease of his brows, and now, standing this close to him, you can see it all in a new perspective. 

Max releases a breath, bored and unexplainable. Runs a hand through his hair, turns his face for a second before connecting his gaze back to yours. “Look, you appear to be a sweet girl, but…I think you should turn down Christian’s offer.”

“Why?” He’s taken aback. You catch it the moment his lips twitch in the slightest. You tilt your head, urging him to answer. “You must have a reason, so what is it?”

“You’d hate working with me.”

“And you get to decide that?”

Max rolls his eyes. “Have you enjoyed this conversation so far?”

“No.”

“Then you probably wouldn’t enjoy our time either. And I’d just rather not waste my time on you finding out. No offense.”

“No, no, none taken,” you respond sarcastically. By now, Christian and Checo have spotted you both, secretly hoping there was some sort of friendship forming. They wave cheerfully and you mimic their movements. 

“I hope we get along—I really do,” you say with a smile as you wave enthusiastically over at Christian who lets out a whistle and sends you an excited thumbs up.

His jaw clenches.  

“If not, you’re really going to hate having me around.” 

-

By now, you’ve completely understood why every other person has quit on him. 

Your blood boils deep inside your veins for the millionth time in the past hour. His large hand covers his face as he continues speaking with his engineers. They all look back at you, half-amused, half-pitiful. They grimace when you try once again to get a picture of him, only to get shut down by him spinning around to make you face his back. 

“Unbelievable,” you mutter beneath your hot breath, glaring harshly to the point you feel a migraine growing, pounding the sides of your head. Marching off, you cross over to Checo’s side of the garage, watching as he discusses his strategies with a couple of his crew members. “Hey.”

“Hey,” he responds, flashing a bright smile. “What are you doing here?”

“Pleading for you to take me back?” He laughs, eyes crinkling, freckled nose scrunching with humor. “It feels like I’ve signed my life away.”

“Ah. Come on. It can’t be that bad. Give him some time.”

“It’s been a month!” you exclaim. “What more does he need?”

The Mexican driver’s eyes soften, feeling bad for the swap neither of you wanted, but knew was necessary. Checo knows how patient you can be, how sweet and caring you tend to act towards those you truly care about. And right now? He worries you won’t ever reach that point with Max. 

A heavy sigh. “Max isn’t much of a talker, you know that. But maybe—in order for him to get comfortable around you, he needs you to do something that the other photographers didn’t bother doing.”

Your stomach churns. “Like what?”

He smiles warmly. “Getting to know him.”

Maybe Checo was right. Maybe all Max needed was a friend—someone to talk to.

Sliding back to your side of the garage, you sheepishly walk over to the grumpy Dutchman. Currently, he’s sitting down on the floor, back pressed against the wall, scrolling through his phone. “C-c-can I talk to you?” you ask, nervous fingers lacing through the hoop of your jeans.

He doesn’t bother raising his gaze. “Can you even talk to begin with?”

“S-sorry?”

This time, he does look up, looking past his lashes. “Your stutter.”

Lamely, your mouth opens, only for you to find it drier than the Sahara Desert. The crack of your voice is a clear indication over your weak attempt to speak and that just makes you a blushing mess. Fuck him. You took several speech therapy classes to try and get rid of it, but him pointing out a stutter you thought has gotten better over time makes you want to be photographer number nine. 

You glare—hard. You mentally go over your dialogue and that itself makes you feel small. Embarrassed. So, instead…you don’t say anything at all.

There’s a reason no one likes to work with him.

And you think you just found out.

-

Some days are easier than others. Some days are harder.

Today? 

Today was awful.

“Jesus Christ, Max! What the fuck was that?” Jos yells, nearly pressing his face against the Red Bull driver who stands close by, watching him flinch in the slightest before regaining composure. You’ve heard rumors—plenty of them. Between mechanics, between Checo and a few other bystanders, you heard them all. How Jos’ behavior was unbearable to deal with, especially when it came to him and Max. You just never thought you’d witness it firsthand. 

“My brakes weren’t working,” he replies, holding eye contact that would have left you in a coma. “It was never my intention to crash.”

“See, you say that, and yet everytime I come and visit, you always seem to be messing up one way or another,” Jos hisses, face beet red, and a splash of saliva spraying over Max as he grits his teeth, taking a step back. “I’m confused—do you want to lose the Championship this year or what?”

“No,” the Red Bull driver fires back, firm and quick. Blue eyes translate to a darker shade as they look to where his dad wears a mocking smile. “I’m winning that title, don’t worry.”

Running a hand against his stubble, Jos rolls his eyes before releasing a tired breath. As if he’s the one working endless hours. As if he’s the one who just crashed against the wall at a terrifying speed he couldn’t decrease even if he tried. As if he’s the one with the bruised temple. 

Everything was just always about him. 

“Don’t bother resting until you figure out how to fix all the shit you’ve caused.” Sharp eyes narrow. “Got it?”

“Got it,” Max whispers, watching as he storms off without even saying goodbye to anyone else that wasn’t Christian himself. So much for having him around. Frustrated, he angrily yanks his gloves off, throwing them against the wall and walking the opposite direction.

Something tells you to leave him alone—let him be. You get why he’s upset, but you checking up on him probably wouldn't help. Also, you're supposed to be mad at him, right?

And yet.

“Wait up!” you gasp, out of breath. 

Clenching his jaw, he stops dead in his tracks, turning to look at you with accusing eyes. “Why are you following me?”

“I just…” Coming to a stop as well, you wince at your sudden side stitch. “He shouldn’t have yelled at you that way,” you finish, analyzing the way his body stiffens. “Especially in front of everyone.”

Blue orbs flicker past your figure for a second, then he lets out a lopsided smile. “I bet you enjoyed it, though. You know? Because I’ve sort of been acting like a dick towards you…” The small smile disappears, replaced with a thin line.

“I didn’t,” you find yourself admitting. His brows raise up with surprise, and even you’re surprised to be telling the truth. You should feel good about this moment—someone finally told him off, someone finally put him in his place. But you felt none of that satisfaction. If anything, you felt bad. Swiping your tongue against your lips, you purse them awkwardly. “And you haven’t been a dick. He has.”

And for the first time—he laughs. 

You blink, bewildered at the sound, but he doesn’t seem to notice that. “Like father, like son, right?” he jokes, making you feel like this was all some sort of fever dream. He continues, squatting down against the wall until he sits down completely against the cold pavement. “Your perspective about me has suddenly changed, or what?”

Hesitant, you choose to sit across from him, tucking your legs beneath your butt. His eyes close, smiling softly. Though I doubt it, he mumbles. “I just think I had you all wrong, that’s all.”

“Yeah?” he encourages. “Why?”

You swallow. “Well…because—now it all makes sense. Why you’re so cold towards everyone, I mean. You do get it from your dad, but it’s also not your fault.”

“My dads not the problem,” he hums. “I am.” Your legs are slowly becoming numb, buzzing like a thousand ants are crawling on them, but you don’t dare move an inch, scared of ruining the moment of him being so honest despite being allergic to it. “I let him down constantly and he’s just being…candid.” His eyes open, focused like he’s known you’ve been here all along, sitting across from him. “The issue here is that no one seems to get that. And that’s fine, but I do.”

“C-c-can I…” you cringe at the sound of your stutter, biting harshly down against your sore tongue. You expect him to laugh—make fun of you in any way possible—hold it over your head…but he doesn’t. Instead, he waits patiently for you to feel comfortable enough to continue your question. Your chest loosens up, along with your anxiety. You never thought he’d help with that. “C-can I ask you a q-q-que—”

“A question?” he finishes your sentence, you feeling immensely grateful. You nod. “Sure,” he answers.

Repeating the question over a couple of times, you find yourself feeling more and more comfortable around him and it’s only been a couple of minutes. “Why do you belittle me?”

There’s no way of hiding his shame now as his head hangs low, dirty blond hair hugging the sides of his face with a thin layer of sweat, a purple bruise forming due to his crash of high impact. A tsk. “I want you to know that I don’t hate you. Regardless of what you might think.”

You nod, paying close attention. 

He shrugs. “But I just don’t think we’ll work well together.”

“That’s it?” you ponder, genuinely lost. “You haven’t-t-t even given me a chance to prove myself. Maybe we can?” A beat. “Or maybe you’re not telling the w-whole truth.”

A playful scoff erupts from this throat, ignoring your comment. “You’re right. I haven’t given this a fair shot.” A calm look paints his normally stoic features. “And it doesn’t seem like you’ll be quitting anytime soon.” Reaching out to swat his race boot, you smile, eyes crinkling. The Dutchman chuckles. “So maybe we should start getting along, no?”

“I agree,” you comment, straightening your shoulders and extending your legs, instantly feeling a wave of relief from the pressure. “I-I-I’d like t-that.” Pause. Your smile stretches. “I’d like that very much.”

What you know now is obviously something you didn’t know back then.

So realistically, you fell into a friendship that ended like most.

Complete, utter disaster.

-

As time went on, Max started to change for the better. His glares turned into soft smiles, his monotone voice turned into something that was more untroubled. He was starting to become someone you consider a friend, and you couldn't help but wish he felt the same way too.

“Come out and have a drink with us,” you say, carefully cleaning your lens with the back of your shirt. He looks up from where he packs his things into a small duffel bag. You nod enthusiastically. “Come on, it’s my birthday and I want you there. Celebrate my birth, celebrate your win—it’ll be fun.”

“I don’t like to party,” he confesses, scrunching his nose like the thought alone makes him want to puke. “Never have, never will. Happy birthday, though.”

“You’re no fun,” you mumble, placing your camera back into your own bag. “I wish you’d be more fun.” A beat. “Wait. What do you do for fun?”

“I don’t have any. I just…live a quiet, peaceful life whenever I’m able to.” He throws his bag over his broad shoulder. “I like it better that way, anyways.” With that, he walks out of his driver's room.

Gathering the rest of your things quickly, you chase after him, struggling to keep up with his long strides. “It’s okay to have a quiet life if that’s something you want, but, I don’t know…” You turn the corner, soft hair whiplashing. “Aren’t you able to…well, put that aside for special occasions?”

“Like what? Your birthday?”

You blush heavily. “Well—no. But maybe yours? I know it’s coming up. What are you gonna do then? Stay home working on a crossword puzzle?”

“Not necessarily. Perhaps I’ll read a book, who knows.” Still walking towards his car, he momentarily turns back to look at you, watching as your cheeks glow bright pink. He smiles before turning back. “I’ll make sure to let you know.” Unlocking his car, he raises a brow. “You coming?”

“Can’t,” you pant softly. “Promised Checo that I’d help him find a gift for Carlota.”

“His daughter or his wife?”

Seeing as they share the same name, you can’t help but giggle. “I’m actually not sure.” Flashing one last smile, you wave sweetly. “I’ll make sure to let you know!”

He keeps his eyes on you, watching as you jog towards Checo who laughs as you trip over a nearby rock, nearly falling. Max laughs to himself, feeling an unfamiliar burst of happiness. But that all flies right out the window as soon as his phone buzzes deep inside his pocket, making him groan.

“Hey, Dad.”

-

He ends up texting for your birthday and you end up doing the same. You end up going out to party and he ends up staying home. Point is, you do exactly what you two said you were going to do, so when a last minute texts comes through at midnight, you’re low key appalled.

Max, 12:00pm

Are you home?

He knows where you live because you once told him. You’re just surprised he remembers.

Yeah? Where are you?

Max, 12:04pm

Come outside. Bring a sweater.

The ocean roars loudly as you two make your way closer towards the shore. The breeze is ice cold, but you aren’t complaining. He is, though.

“Shit. It’s freezing.”

A giggle. “Need a jacket, princess?”

Sending a deadpan expression, he shrugs you off, choosing to sit close enough to see the waves, but far enough to not get wet. “I don’t want you to make a big deal out of this, but…I got you something.”

“Max,” you coo, admiring the film camera he hands you as if it’s nothing. But it’s not nothing because when it comes to him it means everything. “This must’ve cost you a fortune,” you whisper, fingers tracing the rim of the black camera that shines against the moonlight. “You shouldn’t have.”

“And you shouldn’t have stuck around. But you did. So…thank you.” The tides grow louder, making him do the same. “I never really said it, but I’m grateful for having you as a friend.”

You freeze and he seems to notice what he said, too.

“Co-worker?” he tries, cringing.

You relax. “F-f-friend sounds better.”

And there it is again, that warmness that only seems to appear whenever you’re around. It should be alarming, but at this point it's not. If anything, it’s normal.

“Now I feel like shit,” you speak up, bumping your leg against his. He hums. “I didn’t get you anything for your birthday. And if you know anything about friendships, then you’d know that presents are a vital thing.”

“Don’t fret. I don’t need anything else other than…” he trails off. “How was your birthday, anyways?”

You don’t notice his sudden shift. Or maybe you did. Either way, he doesn’t know. You snort. “Got shit-faced, what else do you expect? Though, I faintly remember Abby kissing the bartender, so that was cool.” When he fails to recognize the name, you roll your eyes as if you’re dealing with a third grader. “Checo’s photographer? She’s awesome. Has her own car.”

It’s his turn to laugh now. “And you don’t?”

“Nope. But God, I wish. Maybe one day.” You dig your feet deeper into the sand, twisting your lips before smacking them as if that might help hydrate them. You squint an eye. “I’m barely home, so there’s really no need for one yet. I can sense you wondering.”

“I was,” he admits. Swallowing, he mimes your movements. “I’m barely home, either.”

“Do you miss it?”

“Do you?” he returns with no response.

You ponder. “I know I miss my parents. My sister. But other than that, no—maybe not.”

“I don’t either.”

“But I thought you were a homebody?” you accuse.

“Well, I am, but…I miss my home. The place I paid for with my own money.”

“What home don’t you miss, then?” 

“The one my parents tried to convince me and my sister that it was. We had all the family portraits and the typical white picket fence, but it just never felt like home to me. And I don’t miss that.”

“Oh.” Just oh. 

“Yeah,” he follows with a raspy voice. “Oh.”

Tugging the jacket closer to your chest, you shiver. Surely your nose is burning bright pink and your lips are chapped, but nothing felt better than this moment for some reason. “I don’t like your dad,” you mumble beneath your breath, hoping the wind would hide your confession, but if it didn’t, you wouldn’t care.

It didn’t. 

Scoffing, Max nods. “Yeah. Me neither.”

“I don’t like the way he speaks to you. It’s not—normal.” A beat. “Do you think it is?”

“I do,” he hums, blinking slowly as he watches the way a bird gets caught in the wind, trying to lurch forward but only getting sent back. “You get used to it.”

“You shouldn't have to,” you whisper, brows pinched up with concern. “I know I said you were a complicated person, but you’re not. And—and I just don’t want you to think that it’s true.”

He’s the first to disconnect his eyes from yours, feeling a burning sensation forming in the depths of his throat. It’s not completely unknown, he’s felt it many times when he was a kid. The only difference was that he used to feel it behind his eyes as well. Which is why it catches him off guard this time around—years later. 

“You’re not like him, Max,” you say with reassurance. Blue eyes soften up, feeling a rush of emotions. This is something he didn’t even know he needed. Tilting his head, he opens his mouth lamely, words getting stuck like a boy and not a man. You smile tenderly. “And I hope you know that.”

He drives you back home that night despite saying you’d be fine walking back. You fall asleep for the next thirty-minutes, and he overthinks through all of it. Fingers tap against the steering wheel, taking occasional glances to where you breath softly. 

“I told you to bring a sweater,” Max groans once you enter his car. “You’re going to freeze to death.”

You wave him off. “I think I’ll survive.”

As soon as you arrive at the beach, you’re quick to rub your hands against your skin, wishing to have some sort of blanket. With a knowing look, the Dutchman rolls his eyes, slipping off his jacket and placing it over your shoulders. 

“What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Thanks,” you say, biting the inside of your cheek, suppressing a smile. 

Hearing his teeth chatter, he blows his cheeks out, squinting his eyes when a particular gust of wind slaps him across the face. “Shit. It’s freezing.”

“Need a jacket, princess?” you tease, enjoying the way his lips form a snarl. 

You giggle.

It’s his favorite jacket, the one you’re wearing.

It’s his favorite because of that.

“I’m fucked,” he whisphers to himself, grinding his teeth until he feels them squeak. He tries to focus on the road, but that seems to be the most difficult task in the world when he has you right besides him. And he isn’t thinking anything sinisterly dirty—he’s not—but instead, he’s dreaming.

I can be different, he thinks to himself, repeating the same words over and over. I can be someone she likes. If I try hard enough, I can do that. Planning ahead was always something he hated, but just thinking about it now makes his veins rush with excitement. As if the possibility of you might exist somewhere down the line.

You said some things he never thought he’d hear, because to be quite honest, he never thought someone would understand him the way you have. For the longest time, he thought a fucked up person like him could only get with an equally fucked up person or simply he’d have to live by himself for the rest of his life.

And here you came, proving him wrong.

He doesn’t realize how fast he’s going, how he’s pressing hard on the gas. Not until you groan. “Fuck. Are you alright?” he asks with concern as soon as he hears your head thud against the window from his jerky turn at the roundabout. 

“Yeah.” A beat, then a giggle. You rub your head. “This is gonna bruise.” He winces, taking a glance. Keep your eyes on the road, you laugh, but he can’t. Not when your eyes crinkle the way they do. Like your eyes have a dimple of their own. He’s never seen that on anyone else. “We’ll be twins,” you state as some sort of lame joke. And it does the job because he’s quick to let out a chuckle. 

“Sorry,” he apologizes. 

“Don’t worry about it.”

Pulling up to your house, you go in to unbuckle yourself before slipping the jacket off. He shakes his head. “Keep it.”

“That wouldn’t make any sense,” you try. “I’m already home, I’ll be fine. Put it on.”

“Well I’m not cold anymore,” he pushes back. “It’s fine, really. I have plenty—what’s one missing?”

“It's freakishly soft,” you debate, furrowing your brows with concentration. “Okay. Thanks, Max.” Grabbing your film camera, you let out a shy smile. “For this too. Just—for these past few hours. I had fun.”

“Yeah,” he hums gingerly, running his hand along the steering wheel. “So did I.”

This grabs your attention, ears perking up like some German Shepard. “Am I dreaming? Did Max Verstappen just say he had fun? With me?” you interrogate, eyes shining. 

He groaned, tossing his head against his seat. “I take it back—”

“You can’t do that—”

“I take it back,” he repeats firmly, but the amusement poured into his accent tells you otherwise. “Now get out of my car.”

You poke your tongue out at him before raising your hands up defensively. “Drive safe,” you shout over your shoulder as you walk towards your house, backward. “Oh! I almost forgot to ask!” Rushing to his side of the car, you signal for him to roll his window. He does, quirking a brow. You grin. “Let me take you out.”

His heart thuds. Pulses. Skyrockets. 

It’s a scary feeling. 

You beam. “Yes! As your birthday present! Let me take you out. Just you and I.”

“You and I?” he repeats robotically, blinking with round eyes. 

A nod. “Yeah. Just like today. You took me out and gave me an amazing gift. Let me do the same for you.” Pause. “Please?”

It dawns on him that this is the first time a girl has asked him to hang out. Whether it’s romantic or not, it doesn’t matter, and the way you bat your cartoon eyes makes him spiral, feeling his breath hitch. “Y-y-yeah,” he finds himself saying. “Sure. Why not?”

“You only turn twenty-seven once,” you hum. Like that might seal the deal besides the fact that he’s already accepted.

The Dutchman chuckles nervously, fighting the urge to just…God.

“You only turn twenty-seven once,” he agrees, sharing a tight smile, hands gripping the leather wheel. 

-

Your plans end up getting pushed back due to your guys’ tight agenda. The season is tough on not just him, but the entire team. McLaren is thriving, sometimes more than Red Bull, and that has everyone feeling on edge.

Chewing your nails, you watch as Lando crosses the finish line, nearly a minute ahead from the Dutchman. You know he’s not going to want to talk about it, but he will. He has to. 

Because Jos is here.

“You’re getting quite comfortable on that second step,” Jos says tauntingly. He’s not yelling—not like the other times—and somehow, that just makes him scarier.

“I’m not,” Max defends as he rubs a sweaty hand against his face. His hair is longer than usual, so that doesn’t help the awkwardness he feels when he has to push it back. “We still did good—”

“Good is not good enough,” he hisses, pressing a finger against his son's suit, making him take a step back before he regains composure. “Unless it is. For you, I mean.” Silence. “So what? Is it?”

“No,” Max mumbles, fighting the urge to push him back. He’s thought about it—many times. And maybe he’s reached his limit, and maybe he can do it…

But he’d never dare to in front of you.

Blue eyes quietly plead for you to leave. And yes. That would be the wisest thing to do right about now, but your feet betray you. They’re super glued, you begin to suspect. Why else would you not be able to move?

“You used to be so good,” Jos points out, eyes only getting sharper. “What happened? What’s distracting you? Who’s distracting you?”

Max’s eyes flicker for a second—just a fucking second—to where you stand, paralyzed, and he prays he doesn’t notice it. But he does. 

Turning to face your small figure, Jos lets out a shallow laugh, a confused expression mapping his wrinkled face. “Are you serious?”

“I—” Max tries, but is waved off by his massive hand. 

“A crush isn’t going to get you anywhere, Max, come on, you know this.” Jos rubs his eyes, aging quickly. “Especially with a girl like her.”

“I-I-I,” you stutter, feeling your face grow red. Swiftly, this makes you feel as dumb as when you first met Max, but somehow worse. 

A million times worse. 

“Y-y-you what?” Jos mocks your stutter, walking closer to where you stand. “You what?”

“H-h-he doesn't like me. So, there’s no need to…w-w-w—”

“Worry,” Max fills in, marching to stand in between you two, and you immediately feel your shoulders relax, but your breath continues to struggle to find its way out of your system. “There’s no need to worry. I just had a bad race, it happens. It’s no one’s fault.”

“Except it is!” Jos finally screams, spraying his saliva with every punctuation, something you’ve come to realize happens when he gets fired up, which nearly occurs every time he's here. The only difference is that this time, you’re caught in between the argument. Jos breathes heavily, chest puffing. “It's someone's fault, and I’ll lay it out for you since you can’t seem to take responsibility—it’s your fault.”

“No, it’s not,” you protest from behind Max, feeling courage quickly expand through your ribs because you knew that wasn’t true. “It’s no one’s fault.”

But someone like you is invisible to someone like Jos Verstappen. 

Ignoring you, he gets rid of that last step that separates Max from himself, faces inches apart from one another. And it’s terrifying how similar they are. Their eyes, their nose, their lips. The only thing separating them from being twins was Max’ kindness.

“Say it’s your fault,” Jos orders with a solid and demanding tone. “Say the crash was your fault and that you fucked up.”

You’re breath catches once again, frantic eyes darting to where Max clenches his fists before letting them relax.

“The crash was my fault—”

“It's all your fault,” Jos adds.

The Red Bull drivers lips twitch. “The crash was all my fault…” A beat. “And I fucked up.”

“Max,” you whisper, gingerly grabbing his hand. He flinches at your touch and pulls away as soon as his dads eyes linger down to where you two connect. You wither.

“Get your act together,” Jos threatens with fury before walking out, slamming the door behind him.

You jump at the unexpected sound. No one speaks, no one moves, no one dares to acknowledge what just happened.

Max Verstappen lands second on this week's podium, Crofty announces, pulling you away from the daze you were stuck in. Max’s gaze switches over to the T.V. as he stiffens. Say, what are the chances he wins this year's Championship against Lando Norris who seems to be having the time of his life in that McLaren? 

“You did good out there—”

“No. I didn’t.” He looks away. “But that won’t matter because that Championship is mine.”

Mine.

-

You notice he’s reverted back to his old habits the moment he gets snappy. The moment he starts blocking everyone out, including you. You sort of saw it coming, but still—it hurt. And it took you a moment to realize, realize why it burned so much.

You loved Max Verstappen.

He’d always been unapproachable. Spine-chilling, even. But ever since you two started talking to each other as more than strangers, you realize he was none of that. He had once been kind, once been sweet, but this was all Jos’ fault. Weeks went by—months, even—and all you ever really did was snap pictures of him on the stimulator. That’s it.

It’s as if your friendship never even existed.

It came as no surprise when he failed to pick up your phone calls and texts. He was awfully good at doing that. By the time you were a month away from the Championship, you had stopped trying.

Max can feel the awkward tension he had created. It sat there between you two every time you followed after him like a dog on a leash, timidly taking his picture, afraid of getting the wrong reaction out of him. It had happened a couple of times in the past, when you first started working for him, so it seemed you were trying to prevent history from repeating itself. The slight sting in his chest took a jab at him every time without fail.

Vegas was typically a good time for both the drivers and people like you. You’d be the first to admit how easy it is to get lost in the gist of it all. 

Except this time around, it was hard to live through it.

-

Hey. You home?

Max groans, rubbing his eyes until they’re wide awake, picking up his phone. 

Max, 12:00pm

Are you okay?

A minute scrolls by. 

I have your present. 

The first thing he notices is his jacket. His initials are sewn onto the sleeve. He didn’t even know that was a thing, but the sight of it made his stomach flip. “Looks good on you,” he compliments as soon as he enters your car. You chuckle. 

It’s a nice jacket. The best one I own.

He notes how smooth you drive, like a grandma. You’re precise with your turns, ahead with your signals—extremely observant. 

“See how I steer the wheel,” you speak up, wiggling a neat brow. “Unlike you.”

“I said I was sorry,” he laughs, getting a reminder of the last time you two were together. “How’s the bruise?”

“Nearly gone.” A beat. “How’s yours?”

He smiles, remembering about his own. “Nearly gone.”

“Told you we’d be twins.”

You take him to a nearby park. It’s lame, I know, you apologize, wincing shyly. I’m not good at this, but I hope your present makes up for it.

“This is great,” he eases your nerves, seeing how they scribble across your face. “This is my first time at a playground, actually.”

Your eyes widen as soon as you sit down on the yellow swing. “You’re kidding, right?”

He shakes his head. “Nope.”

“Huh.”

He takes a seat on a nearby swing, following your soft kicks against the sand. “My dad preferred to have me on the race track than waste my time on anything else.”

This gets an eye roll out of you, soft wind fanning your face as you kick back and forth. “That explains it all.” He shuts his eyes momentarily, enjoying the silence. Far enough away, he can hear the city—but that’s the least of his worries.

You’re the first and only one to give me a childhood so late in life. Round eyes flicker towards him where he digs his shoes into the sand, not worried about the uncomfort it'll cause. If it weren’t for you, I probably would’ve gone my whole life without knowing what a playground is like.

The thought alone is saddening. Your mind makes up an image of young Max, looking into the distance at every other kid who runs towards slides and monkey bars as he straps his helmet and slips on his gloves, longing to know what it’s like to have a normal youth. 

“Don’t feel bad.”

Your lip wobbles. “Don’t make me feel things, then. Why would you say that?”

“I thought we could open up to one another,” he jokes, but you can hear his seriousness in it. That’s all he’s needed, after all—someone to talk to. “Should I shut up from here on out?”

“No,” you reply rapidly, gripping your hand around the metal chain. “Don’t you ever shut up.”

His smile relaxes, eyes opening as he tilts his head, then looks up ahead at the moon. And it’s one of those nights where it’s scarily white—almost too much. One might think it’s a flashlight, by the way it shines, but there’s a clarity to it that makes it easy to admire. “I don’t think I love my dad.”

 You try not to let out a reaction. “You don’t mean that.”

“No…” He clicks his tongue to the roof of his mouth. “I think I do.” A shrug. “I respect him. A tiny bit, but I do. But love?” A bitter scoff. “God, I don’t even think he loves me.”

“Sure he does—”

“He loves my success,” he cuts you off. “And it’s embarrassing how everybody knows it.”

Neither of you are swinging anymore. Gathering your thoughts, you look down at your lap, inspecting your dirty shoes. “If it helps, I love you, Max.” In a heartbeat, his blue eyes dart towards you, seeing the way you breathe evenly. “Is that surprising to you?” He doesn’t answer. He couldn't answer. And boy did he want to. Smiling tenderly, you nod. “It’s not that hard, really.” You begin to swing again, as if you didn’t just drop the biggest bomb on him that left his heart in his throat, beating at an abnormal speed. “Not when you’re so patient with me.”

The chain squeaks, making him snap out of his daze, blinking harshly. “I hate my stutter. I’ve had it tugging at my leg since I was eight. Don’t know what caused it, but it’s been there, trust me. So, when you made fun of it a while back, I thought to myself: this guy is a real douchebag.”

Shame pours within him as he recalls that interaction. Checo had told him about his photographer's stutter and how hard it was to hold a conversation with her at first, but the longer they worked together, the more he found it endearing. And that’s exactly what Max felt the moment you became his photographer at a stage in his life where he still didn’t know you all that well other than the fact that you carried your camera like a newborn baby. 

“I’m so—”

“Don’t be,” you cut him off. “I don’t hold grudges. Plus, you’re quite helpful now that you’re used to my stammering, don’t you think?”

Guilt fuels him as he apologizes with his eyes. “I shouldn’t have mocked you. Ever.”

“Probably.” A hum. “But the way you read my mind makes up for it.”

He’s been doing a lot of that, without even realizing it. He concludes your sentences without batting an eye about the words you’re trying to get out, trying to express. And in all fairness, you hadn’t noticed it either, not until Checo pointed it out.

That’s how normal it had become.

“My stutter was my number one insecurity growing up.” Connecting your gaze back to where he’s already looking, you draw your eyebrows in with gentleness. “And you made it go away.”

Before he can think his words through, he opens his mouth. “I love your stutter.”

You blink, bewildered at the comment. Then—you laugh.

“Thanks?” Your volume increases. “Never heard that one before.”

Screwing his eyes shut, he shakes his head, grimacing at the sound of his voice replaying inside his crowded mind. 

“What I’m trying to say is that I love you,” he rambles, much faster and correctly this time, making you stop your laughter, eyes going wide once again. “Is that surprising to you?” he whispers, awaiting a response with anxiety dripping from his fingertips that clench around the chain that loops around the swing, giving it security. 

“You mean as friends, right?” you ask carefully, making his stomach drop.

“I don’t think friends think about each other the way I think about you,” he confesses, out of breath by the sudden shift he’s caused. “I see you differently.”

As soon as your lips part to say something, he pleads silently as if saying: please, just hear me out. And that’s exactly what you do.

He’s standing right in front of you now, pacing back and forth like some football coach as you watch him like a clueless cheerleader who sits on the sidelines. He clears his throat after a lengthy minute.

“I noticed you first when you walked into your interview four years ago.”

Your mind races back to a moment in time where your camera was significantly cheaper and your dreams were larger than life. 

He nods, watching as you recollect the memories that were tucked in the far back of your brain, like it didn’t matter for the longest time, which to be fair, it hadn’t.

“You were supposed to be my photographer.”

Your brows furrow, completely lost by his words. “What?”

His large hands run through his shaggy hair from his slumber that you had ripped him away from. “From the very beginning, it was supposed to be you and me. But…” 

Neat brows narrow down harder. “But what?”

Max stops his pace, killing his tracks that lands him right in front of you looking up at him with innocent eyes. He sighs. “I said I didn’t want you working with me.”

“Oh.” A beat. “It’s always been this way, then? You not wanting me near you?”

“For a while,” he says quickly before cringing. “But now that we’ve worked together, I realize the mistake I made. How many years it could’ve been us…”

“What’s the real reason?”

Flinching, he squirms under your focus. “What?”

You nod, encouraging him. “You always said it was because you didn’t think we would work well together, and look at us now—we have.” Leaves rustle from the dozen of trees that wrap around the park. “What was the actual reason?”

He’s known the answer to this question from the moment you joined the team, more specifically, Checo’s. He knew the answer to the question the moment he crossed that finish line, claiming his first Championship like the greedy man he was carved out to be by his own father.

He’s just not sure how you’d take it. Coughing awkwardly, scratching the back of his neck, he avoids eye contact. “I knew you’d distract me.”

Your stomach twists like a licorice. “Oh God—have I?”

“No!” he yelps, but the defense he guards up like a soldier lets you know that that’s nowhere close to being true. You shrink, increasing the distance between you two. His palms begin to sweat. “You haven’t—”

“Your dad was right,” you whisper. “I have been a distraction to you. That’s why you’ve been having such a weird season compared to the previous ones…”

“No,” he presses firmly. “The car has changed, that’s why I’ve been driving differently, it has nothing to do with you.”

But you don’t seem to engage with his words, instead, you shake your head like an angry child who never gets their way at the candy store. “How can you love me when I’m the reason your dad puts you down every chance he gets?”

It’s like you forced your fingers in at an open wound, one he tends to forget is there when he’s with you, but when you mention it's existence, he remembers why he dreads it so much. 

“He talks to me like that because he’s a shitty dad, not because of you,” he says, suddenly feeling overwhelmed. “I liked you the second year I won my Championship. The first time you said my name.”

“Congrats, Max,” you say with an awkward smile after you pull away from an even more awkward hug. “You did good.”

“I was infatuated by you the third year I won my Championship.”

“You can’t keep firing your photographers,” Christian lectured him with a tired voice, making his accent sound ten times stronger. “Especially when we don’t even have their replacement.”

“I haven’t found one I like,” he says as he watches you walk by, heading towards Checo with a bright smile, bragging about a recent setting that puts your old photos to shame. He looks away when you turn towards his garage, as if you felt his eyes on you. “It’s not my fault.”

“No, young man, it is,” the team principal presses, letting out a tired sigh. “You need to mature with the idea of having one, if not—”

“If not what?”

“If not…uh…we’ll…” Christian looks around for a while before turning back to the Dutchman. “We’ll have to take a different approach.”

“Yeah?” Max questions with amusement. “Which is?”

Christian shrugs. “Swapping Checo’s photographer with yours.”

This makes the Dutch physically recoil. “I’ve told you a thousand times already—it would never work out. She’s too…happy all the time.”

“And maybe that’s exactly what you need.”

Max lets out a shaky breath, watching your chest rise and fall as if you find it harder to breathe with every passing second. 

“And I haven’t won my fourth,” he begins with a light smile and an even lighter tone. “But I already know that I love you.”

This is it. The last smile of his. Of that soft dimple of his that caught you by surprise the first time you saw it. It's the last time because you know that whatever happens after is going to ruin it all.

“I love you—”

“I don’t.”

His lips run dry, forcing a small chuckle like he didn’t hear you right. “I’m—I’m.” He smiles hesitantly. “B-but you said…” No more wind circles around you. “You said it.”

“I know.” You wince, brushing your hair back, annoyed with it by now. “I know I did, but…Max. I didn’t mean it in that way.”

The blue eyed Dutch takes a step backward, noting the uncomfortableness the sand is causing his feet to feel now that the adrenaline is gone. “What do you mean?” he murmurs with embarrassment. “What do you mean?”

Licking your lips, you focus on a tree that stands behind him, how fucked up looking it was. As if someone stabbed it over and over again until it bled wood chips.

“I do love you—but as a friend.”

“Why, though?”

“Friendships last longer,” you respond, like you’ve had the answer sitting on the tip of your tongue for the longest time now. “Relationships don’t.”

“Ours could,” he tries, feeling pathetic. “I’m good at everything. I bet I’ll be good at a relationship, too.”

“A relationship is not a game, Max,” you argue, your voice slightly raising, making him clench his jaw. “And I’m sure you think it is because you're such a perfectionist, but it’s not that easy. There’s a lot of dedication that goes into it.”

“Then I’ll be dedicated to you,” he says. “Heart, body, and soul. I swear. Just—give me a chance.”

“I can’t…”

“But why not?”

“Because all I see is a friend!” you shout, regretting it instantly. His skin loses its natural color, switching to a ghostlike state. His pink lips snap shut like a bear trap. And his furrowed brows revert back to their usual place. Nibbling on your bottom lip, you massage your temples that suddenly feel painful.

“We’re so different from one another, Max. Your life is written down, from birth to death. And you know you’ll live a good one. And mine—mine is constantly changing. I mean, look at it. A few months ago I was working with your teammate and now…” 

He remains silent, patiently watching your lips move with every word that pinches his feelings like the biggest bully. “The love I hold for you is there…but not the same way yours is there for me. Your life moves fast, and I’m barely even able to keep up with a conversation with this fucking stutter that appears most times with others, but very few with you.”

Still nothing. Just his eyes focused on this jacket now, like he's already reclaiming it. “And I really do thank you for that, I do. But I thank you the most for letting me get to know you for who you really are. Not who you pretend to be or what others say you are—and I wish I could reciprocate, but…I just… don’t.”

An eternity passes by, it feels like. He doesn’t even know how long you two have been standing here now, but the sunrise is a clear indication that it’s been forever. And he doesn’t feel tired, nor does he feel upset…

He just feels dumb. 

“I get it,” he finally speaks up. “We view each other differently and that’s not your fault.”

“Yeah, but—”

“It's not your fault,” he repeats, wearing a warm smile, hoping you'd believe his lie. That and he doesn’t think he can handle much more. All he wants to do is go back home. “I’m just glad I had someone to talk to for a while. And, well—I’m sorry. I must have gotten confused by the situation. Maybe I don’t love you, who knows. I probably just got excited, you know? Went my whole life without having an interaction like ours, maybe I’m convincing myself to believe in something that was never there to begin with. For either of us, that is.”

I just got excited, is all. 

-

He did end up winning his fourth Championship the way he said he would. You did end up taking that perfect picture as he stood on that podium, shining as bright as his golden trophy. Jos was happy, Christian was happy, the entire team was happy, but you and Max?

Blue eyes lock with yours, feeling the differenceness between it all. He still loves you, he realizes. He wasn’t confused after all. But neither were you.

All you saw was your best friend, and now you’re not even sure you have one anymore. You two no longer hang out, you barely even speak to one another despite spending most of your days together. He still smiles at you from time to time, but it’s not the same. Nothing could ever be.

And it was a soul crushing thing to realize.

“Congratulations,” you muffle against his race suit as you hug him without your arms fully wrapping around him and his hardly wrapping around you. “This is your moment, Max.” A beat. “No one else’s.”

You’re talking about his dad. He knows that. 

Chuckling, he nods. Like he’s sure of that now. That all his success is his, and his alone. That you have finally managed to matter the most in his life—not his trophies, not his father’s respect.

You.

Pulling away, he still feels your invisible hug linger on him in a way he can’t explain and neither could you. You dig into your pocket, pulling out a silver bracelet. 

“Your birthday gift.”

Right. You never got the chance to give it to him after the last real conversation you two ever had. After that, both of you ignored the fact it ever even happened, and in a way, he was grateful for that, but that didn’t stop it from stinging. Looking down at it, he reads the engravement, feeling his heart take a last lap.

To my favorite open book. With love.

He laughs, clutching his fist around it. “I’m nowhere close to being an open book, but…thanks. I love it.”

You giggle, eyes crinkling with tears as you brush them away. “Not at first, but—eventually. It takes time.”

The cheers rise, but neither of you acknowledge them. Not even when they chant his name, over and over.

“You’ve peeled me,” he admits, nearly whispering. “Completely.” Your breath hitches, sucking in that breath that cost to take in. Max shrugs with a gentle grin. “You’ve peeled the lemon,” he jokes with a shaky breath of his own, blue eyes switching to a darker shade that makes your limbs go weak. “So—do your fingers burn?”

You force a laugh. The kind that makes your head tilt just a bit before tippy toeing to give him a proper kiss on the cheek. He goes still.

“I wish they did. That’d make my decision much easier to go through.”

With that, you step away, the Dutch immediately being over taken by journalists, photographers, the FIA, the drivers—everyone except the only person he really wants there celebrating with him.

His mind is racing faster than his Championship winning car. What decision? What could you possibly mean by that—

Christian embraces him, ruffling his sweaty hair as he pours a bottle of champagne over his head, laughing with glory. Max shakes his head, leaning down to ask the only question that ever made his heart break before he ever even got a response.

“Did she quit?”

Christian knows exactly who she is, but what catches him by surprise is how agitated he appeared to suddenly get. The team principal shrugs. “We’ll find you a new one!” 

“No,” Max whispers in disbelief as he tries to find you from a distance, but all he sees are flashing lights that begin to cut his patience thin. “No.”

I wanted her.

taglist: @blueflorals @starmanv @coolio2195 @lovrsm @weekendlusting@chanshintien @brune77e @myownwritings @timmychalametsstuff @milasexutoire@alesainz @c-losur3 @darleneslane @togazzo @urfavnoirette @namgification @lpab @d3kstar @anniee-mr @nebarious@notkaryna

[suiana]

(yandere! golden boy x reader)

you don't think you've ever felt special. well, maybe your mom or something told you that when you were younger but you never really believed it.

you're too normal.

not exceptionally good at one thing, nor are you decently good at everything. you're okay at some stuff and you don't have any particular interests that you're really passionate about. and you know bevause you've tried changing. it's never worked, it never will.

because you're just you.

sometimes you wish you had talent, because then at least you'd be good at something. to lack the passion but have talent, that would be a dream for you. could you imagine? being effortlessly good and having people flock to you without trying? or even the opposite would be nice. being passionate about something sounds... like a life worth living. like your life has purpose. meaning. so what if you don't have talent? at least you'd want to be better, to improve yourself, to have the drive to live.

you have neither, what can you do?

all you do is go through the motions. wake up, go to work, come home, repeat. you don't have any hobbies other than watching the occasional television. it's not like your life is exceptionally hard either. you're blessed with good parents who love you and a select few friends that you're thankful for.

yet there's this... aching gap in your chest that's yearning for something more. something you can't give it. why? because you're just not special enough. you never are. you know this already, there's no use trying to change it.

so you scroll on social media constantly, trying to fill the empty gap in your chest.

but if anything, it only makes the gap worse.

it shows how much you're missing out, how others have it better than you. how others have something going on for them that lets them stand out. something that makes them alive.

maybe it's just the way things are, the way your life was always destined to be. to be the background character that admires others, never the one being admired. the supporting character that stays stagnant with no character growth.

you're just too average.

just plain old you.

plain like a cracker.

never the first choice, never a choice at all.

you merely exist on this world, you're never truely alive and living life like others. and it's a rather unfortunate thing to be doing when you could be achieveing so much but you're just... you. you don't even know who you are. you're just someone, really.

or at least that's what you think of yourself. he could never see you like that. not when he thinks that you're the best thing to ever happen to him.

he's the exact opposite of you. charming, handsome, an absolute adonis on earth. he's perfect in every sense of the word. and he chose you to give his heart to.

you have no idea why he even fell for you in the first place. you're average. not pretty, not ugly, just somehwere in between. you're not particularly charming or whatsoever, a little awkward but can hold a conversation. sure you've dated once or twice but they weren't serious and you didn't feel bad about break up either. you didn't feel much to begin with.

but with him... well, you think that maybe you just might have a chance.

those encouraging words and affectionate gazes, do you think that perhaps there's someone out there who could potentially change the way you live? the way you've been aimlessly drifting about?

there's just no way.

but you think you'll take the chance. with him, you'll get to do things you've never done before. if not, you'll just go back to where you were before. stuck in the middle, living out your days in an endless cycle of contributing to the Earth's death. there's nothing bad in accepting his hand, his promise for a better life.

at the very least, you'll have someone who tells you he loves you. someone who tells you that you're special and that you mean something. someone that partially fills the hole.

you just want to be somebody, and he'll gladly help you out. he might be a little bit too obsessive and protective, but you guess it's just part of him. he can't change something that makes him who he is, change isn't easy. you know that well.

and doesn't it feel nice to be wanted?

just trust him, everything will be fine. he'll teach you how to live, what love feels like. he'll protect you, take care of you...

"i love you, darling."

are those lies or the truth? you don't know, but you don't really care. would someone who wants someone as average as you ever lie about something like that anyway?

his affection burns with such a hot intensity that you're pretty sure could never be fake. you can see that, you're not blind. he very obviously adores you. that much you're sure.

so just give in already, would you? it would make things a whole lot easier if you stopped trying to resist and make sense of the world. sometimes... some things are just destined to happen. like how you see yourself as shit and he thinks you're perfect. that destiny also includes being with him. he won't accept anything else anyway.

don't worry, you'll be very happy. he's sure of that.

[alfascorpiionux]

Astro notes ~ part 4

Water moons (especially Pisces, Cancer) struggle with time management skills.

Earth Moons + Air Moons are usually on time for appointments.

Sag Moons are reliable people and you can trust them to tell the truth even when it’s difficult.

Aries Venus’ love is fierce and protective. They would do everything even the impossible for their loved ones.

Taurus Venus is a provider. The sort of person that buys plenty of stuff for their loved ones, sometimes unnecessary ones. If they are a parent, their children will not lack material things.

Saturn square Venus: is very serious and dedicated in love. Definitely not the type of person who enjoys having flings. They are in for the long run.

Venus in 10th house: might place career over love. Their love life is likely public or just many people know about it. The person might fall in love with a coworker/boss/assistant.

Many personal planets in 11th house (especially Sun/Moon): friends and community play an important role in this person’s life. Like for example if they encounter a difficulty or get sick it’s gonna be their friends or close circle that will offer them the most help. Maybe even more than their blood-related kin/family.

Moreover, it is surrounded by a group of people they trust that they feel the most comfortable and like themselves. This group could be friends, coworkers or even new acquaintances.

Having friends could be vital for these natives’ well-being! If they are socially isolated or they have a controlling partner that doesn’t allow them to meet other people often enough, they might get depressed or even sick.

Many placements in 12th house: the opposite is true and having alone time become quintessential. It is this way that they recharge and find answers to their deepest and most sought-after questions. Another interesting thing I’ve noticed is that they feel very fulfilled if they do something nice for someone. Even a small gesture like opening a door for a stranger. They are sensitive and artistic people that strive for balance, peace and kindness in their everyday life.

Taurus people take your secret to the grave.

On the other hand, Gemini/Libra may “accidentally” tell it to the first person they meet.

Cancer Suns make great mothers and can be incredibly sweet, dedicated and sacrifice a lot for their loved ones.

Sagittarius, Gemini people are great to have at parties. They bring humor, light-heartedness and lots of fun even to the most boring get-togethers.

Gemini Moon+Scorpio Sun: the beastly teacher that expects you to know their subject to absolute perfection and doesn’t forgive tardiness. Hard exams.

Aquarius people could be quite perfectionistic and big nerds.

A love relationship between two Pisces is extremely powerful. Like you can see it’s karmic, destined to be. It could bring incredible love, of the kind you’d never experience with anybody else, but also great hardships and suffering.

Cancer Suns could have a complicated relationship with water. They might fear or dislike being inside or near bigger bodies of water.

Air signs in the big 3: native has the potential to give very engaging and interesting presentations. Like they know what to say and what gestures to use not to bore people and make them focus.

Moon/Venus in 7th house: need a partner to feel good and complete. It is with a lover that they can function best.

Air Sun+Water Moon: pretty volatile, chaotic people or just unstable/inconstant overall.

Capricorn Sun with Aqua Moon is the strange, cold one. You’d like to get to know them but it’s not easy. Probably a pretty distant person who is not very emotionally expressive. Could be a nerd or just do very well in studies. Interest in technology/computers is likely.

[fancyperfectionsweets]

Astrology Observations 🖤🔪

Starting my own personal astrology observation series because I just have something's to say. Do not come for me. I'm not an astrologer. I'm just super interested in vedic astrology:

🥀 I'm starting right hot with a vedic one. Your planets aren't debilitated in a zodiac sign. They are debilitated in a particular sign in particular degrees. You know why? Because debilitation is based on nakshatras which are based on degrees in zodiac sign. For example, moon is only debilitated till 3° in Vishakha nakshatra, not in Anuradha or Jyestha nakshatra. So if you have a higher degree scorpio moon, it's not debilitated.

🥀 Neptune first house is said to attract a lot of copycats. However, most astrologers forget that they themselves could be copycats. Neptune in 1st house especially doesn't understand its own potential so they are prone to copying other people's styles when it comes to fashion, speaking etc.

🥀 I know that ketu's synastry (south node) synastry is karmic. However, nothing is as soul wrenching than that. Ketu conjunct venus in a synastry is "you stir up my soul kinda love" where Venus feels this way. While ketu doesn't feel to this degree. This is exactly why it can be so painful if the ketu person does not reciprocate. They have the potential to really hurt venus.

🥀 Having your atmakaraka (highest degree planet) and darkaraka (lowest degree planet) in the same house indicates somewhere that your spouse will help you achieve your soul's purpose.

🥀 Chiron is not considered a part of vedic astrology. However, it still does stand very true when it comes to lifelong lessons and wounds. I have a 10th house Chiron and I have struggled professionally because of perceived being a certain way. I have venus there which kind of softens it's effects but I'm viewed as airheaded by people in the workplace or my fashion is always a topic with my managers 🥲

🥀 In my personal experience, having way too many planets in one house makes your personality very one sided. Your life focus becomes that house's theme and depending on the house, it can be good or bad. I know someone who has a second house stellium of 5 personal planets. Sun, jupiter, saturn, mercury and , venus and he's very money + luxury driven (2nd house is the house of Taurus).

🥀 A man loves a woman who represents Venus, lusts over lilith, thinks the perfect wifey material is his moon sign but is destined to marry his darkaraka (lowest degree) planet. This is why when moon or venus is darkaraka, it's considered lucky because by default, he'd be more inclined to be happy with her because he'd be easily attracted to her.

🥀 Having moon in the first house and sun in the 10th house means you don't feel confident in yourself but other people do since they view you as your sun and not your inner self (moon), especially in the workplace. If vice versa, sun in 1st and moon in 10th, you'd be confident in yourself but people will view you as unstable and emotional (especially if the moon is in Pisces or cancer).

🥀 Ketu in 9th house culture is not believing or depending on luck. They feel like everything needs to be earned.

🥀 An exalted Pisces venus in the 12th house is super lucky but somehow delulu? They give and give and if not careful, people will literally rip your heart apart. Please safeguard yourself 🥺

🥀 Having an unstable home is having chiron, pluto, scorpio, ketu or saturn in the 4th house. If you have any of these placements, I'm sorry for you. I hope you can heal that inner child.

🥀 In my personal opinion, venus in first house isn't a pretty person placement. It's a charming person placement. You're likable and easily form connections and grow.

That's a wrap 🖤

[rotagnus]

your first child --<3

note: can you guys tell i like horses? LMAOO

this pac will be focusing on your firstborn. if you don't want kids/aren't planning to have any, don't feel like you have to read it! this reading isn't for everyone.

it'll focus on the temperament of your child, their behavior, maybe some qualities of you and the other parent.

thank you for the love on my father/husband reading! more readings will be coming <3

pile 1.

wow. your firstborn is going to be a fierce character. probably a fire sign, but i feel like they may have some earth placements as well. this child may heal some of you who felt overshadowed in the family--they'll adore you as their parent, and they'll be an absolute sweetheart. they might not be the child to take no for an answer, and they can be hardheaded, but that was part of what you wanted to teach them--to be firm and resolute with what they say. they'll be quickwitted, albeit probably not book-smart. they might grow up in a place with lots of birds; i think birds are significant for this pile, not sure why. they'll have darker features, or have a generally darker temperament. might have your nose. they'll have this bright light in them that'll transform into a talent in the right environment. as a parent, you'll encourage them to develop their craft, which can range from a sport like basketball to a hobby like poetry. i think that this child has potential to better the world, and they're a gift to you. i'd advise you to give this child time to bloom, whatever that means to you.

signs: birds, planes, things to do with the sky. warm colors. automobiles/mechanical items. 333. fire/earth signs. sources of water--particularly lakes/rivers. vases.

pile 2.

ohhh baby this child is going to be a little angel. on the quieter side, though, somewhat melancholic. they may be extremely introverted and prefer to stay to themselves, even though some of you guys have a wide social circle. they'll contrast you in all the good ways. they'll probably be very smart, but you have to make sure that you tell them that. they can be insecure and doubtful of themselves. they might not be the kind of a child you expected, and this might weigh heavy on them. they may struggle socially, but pile 2, this isn't all bad. deep inside, they want to be seen--and eventually, they will be. they'll feel like they're with the right group of people, aligned--maybe they'll develop a deep connection to a person or a hobby, but they're destined for greatness. they may not have an easy life, but the rewards will outweigh the bad. they may be an old soul. everything will be alright, though--do not fear.

signs: goats. angelic imagery. music. air signs. diaries/journals. bite marks. long hair. 2000s music. cozy, small spaces.

pile 3.

peacemaker who?!?! this child is gonna have a good heart, pile 3. a great one. they'll have this intricate ability to read situations and people in the blink of an eye. extremely socially smart and adept--an inherited quality rather than a taught one. they'll be accepting of people and unlikely to uselessly argue, but they won't tolerate any bs! they may have more masculine energy--doesn't mean it's a boy, but i'm getting more typically masculine cards and signs. they'll have a pretty nice life, mainly because they worked their ass off for it. you'll instill good values in them--they may not be the most patient person, and they could get on your nerves sometimes. maybe they're a yapper or they cried a lot as a baby, something to do with the voice. other than that, they'll be a typically balanced person, valuing harmony and peace over things that are wastes of time. they may not be fond of family activities, preferring to keep to themselves though...just something to be wary of. other than that, it's all going to be good. this child will bring out a very vulnerable part of you.

signs: flowers. guitar. blue hour. nostalgia. abundance, particularly financially. grandparents. 555. air signs/water signs. beauty in simplicity.

[noharaaa]

𝐌𝐚𝐝 𝐓𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐧 & 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐥𝐮𝐠 (𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐬 𝐱 !𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐠 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐫!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫)

Author’s Note: Disclaimer! This plot is not to encourage drug usage! Don’t do drugs people!

• Reader has no specific gender.

• Parody fic! This is all for jokes.

Enjoy Reading!

╰᭡⿴༘͜─𖧷̷۪۪᪇ ༘᪇𖧷̷۪۪⃟ꦽ⃟:: ᰰ۪۪꧇⿴༘⃕▦᰷᰷ᰰ

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲:

Back in your more questionable days, Choi Su Bong was a frequent (and unforgettable) customer. He’d show up at the oddest hours, paying in cryptic compliments and half-finished rhymes while buying from your stash. You were just trying to make a living, but he treated every transaction like a chapter in some epic cosmic romance. He was the aspiring rapper who thought the universe revolved around him, and you were the unlucky drug dealer stuck listening to his "intergalactic" bars. You thought those days were behind you….until now, when fate (or bad karma) brought him crashing back into your life in the most ridiculous way possible.

part 2 ‖ 𝘔𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵

You thought you would never see him again. Not here in this neon nightmare of death games and psychopathic guards. But there he was: Thanos, in all his glory, with that fucking green jump suit that somehow made him look dumber than whatever way he already looked.

“Y/N,” he said, “Fancy seeing you here.”

You groaned. Loudly. “Of course, it’s you. The universe wouldn’t be cruel enough to allow me to escape this.”

“Cruel? Or destined?”

Yep. That’s right. Back when you were still deep in the game... no, not this death game, the other one, with the gangs and dealers and all of the cursed undergound deals you used to sell to him inthhe past. He wasn’t really ‘Thanos’ at that point. No, he was just Choi Su Bong, a wannabe rapper with a galaxy-sized ego.

And yeah, sure, he paid well (sometimes in bundles he claimed were from a “distant realm,” but who cares), but at the price of listening to him rap the ugliest bars you ever heard. You thought you were forever done with that life. But now?

Now, he’s here. In your face. In this game. While somehow managing to “flirt” in the most awkward, over-the-top ways imaginable.

“What on earth are you doing here?” you said, narrowing your eyes. “Your rap career flopped, or what?”

His exaggerated chuckle made a few of the other players look nervously in your direction, “The rap game couldn't handle me,” he said, “But I knew destiny would unite us again.”

“Destiny? Or that you can’t stay out of trouble?”

He ignored that. “Remember our late-night deals? The way we’d share whispers in the dark with secrets exchanged like precious jewels?”

Seriously?

You stared at him. “Thanos, I sold you weed.”

“Cosmic weed,” he corrected you with his finger held up, “And inspiration.”

“Uh, no? I sold you product … so you could get high and spit more of those garbage raps of yours.”

“I know you meant to say terribly brilliant raps,” he corrected one more time. “And now, here we are. Two fighters in this brutal game, bonded again.”

“I’m trying to survive. not write a duet with you,”

He grinned mischievously. “But survival is an art. And the two of  us? We’ll create a masterpiece together.

Before you could unload with all the insults bubbling in your  throat, Nam-gyu (Player 124) popped out of thin air and attached himself to Thanos like a lost puppy. “Hey, Boss! Who’s your friend?”

“Y/N,  meet Nam-su.”

“Nam-gyu.” Player 124 corrected.

Thanos corrected  himself, “Meet Nam-gyu. My… sidekick.”

Nam-gyu grinned. “Boss says I’ve got potential. What about you? Are you friends with him or something?”

You let out a heavy sigh. “Sure.”

The purple-haired boy added, his voice dripping with innuendo, “More than friends.  Kindred spirits. Partners in destiny.”

Nam-gyu’s eyes widened. “Whoa. That’s deep.”

“It’s delusional” you muttered.

Nam-gyu looked between the two of you. “So… is this like, a thing? You guys got history?”

Thanos smiled, the kind of smile that made you want to punch it off his face. “A cosmic connection, forged in the fires of ambition and—”

“If you say ‘destiny’ one more time, I swear I’ll throw you into the next game.”

Nam-gyu whistled quietly, leaning closer to Thanos. “Feisty much?”

“They’ve always had a fiery temper,” Thanos said, not even trying to hide his amusement. “One of the many things I admire about them.”

“Admire all you want,” you said, crossing your arms. “But if you think I’m going to partner up with you again, you’ve got another thing coming.”

He shrugged, utterly unfazed. “We’ll see, Y/N. We’ll see.”

You huffed, turning on your heel and walking away, hoping to find literally anyone else to align with in this twisted game.

And you knew, deep down, that fate (or your seriously bad luck) wasn’t done with you yet.

part 2 ‖ 𝘔𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵

╰᭡⿴༘͜─𖧷̷۪۪᪇ ༘᪇𖧷̷۪۪⃟ꦽ⃟:: ᰰ۪۪꧇⿴༘⃕▦᰷᰷ᰰ

Author’s Note: (Leave a like! Or reblog! I respond to anyone ❤️)

[rmytears]

○ alexia putellas x teen reader (reader has a name in this)

↳ warnings: no warnings.

A LITTLE HOT-HEADED.

If someone had to describe Maya, they'd probably get stuck on the first word that came to mind: difficult. Difficult to read, like a book in a language you don't understand; difficult to comprehend, like a puzzle with pieces that don't quite fit. Her gaze, often lost in deep thoughts, challenged anyone who tried to get close. And when she spoke, she did it with such sharp sarcasm that it could slice through the tension in the air. It was as if she enjoyed bewildering others, each hidden laugh and every frown part of a game where she always held the lead.

But there was another word that fit her: good. While her personality might have seemed like a maze, on the soccer field she shone with her own light. With the ball at her feet, she transformed. It was as if everything else disappeared and only she and the game existed. Obviously, she needed to improve—she was still very young—but she had potential, enough that trying to ignore it felt like an offense. Maya was good.

As the season progressed, her name began to echo among the first team players. "Have you seen this girl from the B team?" The words spread like ripples. And so, like foam, the rumors reached Alexia's ears, who couldn't ignore the stories about this girl everyone seemed interested in lately.

Intrigued, Alexia decided it was time to see this young promise for herself.

FC Barcelona B vs. RCD Espanyol. The match was going perfectly for the Blaugrana colors. The sun shone intensely on the grass, while the stands filled with a sea of blue and garnet shirts that vibrated with every touch of the ball. The B team players moved the ball with a fluidity that left the fans in a constant state of euphoria. With each pass, each run, it seemed the team was destined for a clear victory.

Maya sat on the bench, observing from her position. With the first half already consumed, her mind was a whirlwind of thoughts. She had been training hard, waiting for her chance to shine, and that moment came when the coach called her to get ready.

However, as she settled into the game, a figure from the opposing team began to make herself noticed, making the atmosphere tense. The Espanyol player, a blonde with tight braids who seemed to have made a personal decision to make Maya's life impossible, started getting too close. Every time Maya received the ball, the opponent appeared like lightning, throwing discrete elbows and disguised stomps masked as legitimate plays. Alexia could see how Maya tried to concentrate, ignoring the provocations, but frustration began to show on her face.

"It's just football," she told herself while running across the field, trying to maintain calm amid the chaos. But her opponent's tricks didn't cease; the referee, with a distant and uncommitted look, seemed to have decided it wasn't his day to intervene. The fouls continued without punishment, and tension on the field increased. Maya noticed how the Espanyol player became increasingly aggressive, playing dirty, an elbow here, a push there.

With time running and the score still in Barça's favor, Maya found herself increasingly trapped in a mental game that wore her down. Alexia, from her position, could notice how the young player's patience was vanishing. The furtive glances Maya threw toward the referee became more accusatory, and her gestures of frustration more evident.

Finally, after a blatant push that left Maya staggering, something inside her clicked. In an instant of contained rage, she decided it was time to respond. With fierce determination, she launched herself at the Espanyol player with a tackle that resonated like thunder in the stadium. The contact was strong and direct, and the referee's whistle sounded like a war cry.

Maya's face turned from surprise to frustration at seeing the red card the referee raised toward her. Helplessness invaded her as the rest of the team halted their game, stunned by her expulsion. The crowd fell into a sepulchral silence, and whispers spread like an echo of disappointment.

Maya found herself alone in the dressing room, the echo of her steps resonating against the tiled walls as she walked to her locker. The coach's lecture still rang in her head—words about concentration and maintaining calm during critical moments of the game. She sighed deeply while dropping onto one of the benches.

"Hey." Vicky's voice pulled her from her thoughts. Her teammate was already changed and ready to leave, the sports bag hanging from her shoulder. "Don't take today's match so hard. You did well."

Maya just nodded, her fingers playing distractedly with her shoelaces.

"The girls are going for ice cream to celebrate the victory," Vicky continued, leaning against the doorframe. "Want to come?"

"I don't think I'm in the mood," Maya mumbled, forcing a small smile that didn't reach her eyes.

"Suit yourself." Vicky shrugged. "See you tomorrow then."

Silence enveloped the dressing room again after Vicky's departure. Maya closed her eyes for a moment, letting the quietness wrap around her. But the peace didn't last long.

"Well, well. Does Barcelona's little star need a moment alone?"

Maya felt every muscle in her body tense at recognizing that voice. The Espanyol player—the same one who had been provoking her throughout the match—was standing behind her. She could feel her presence approaching, invading her personal space.

"What's wrong? Did coach's lecture leave you speechless?" The mocking voice drew closer until Maya could feel her breath on her neck.

It was as if something inside her exploded. In a quick movement, Maya turned and pushed the other player against the wall, her forearm pressing against her rival's chest.

"Don't mess with me," Maya growled, the words coming through clenched teeth. Her eyes sparkled with contained fury. "And for the record, you smell like crap."

A movement at the dressing room entrance caught her attention. Alexia was there, observing the scene with a mixture of surprise and concern on her face. Maya exhaled frustratedly, stepping back to her original spot while rubbing her temples with her fingers—a gesture that caught Alexia's attention, who wondered if it was a sign of stress or perhaps a headache.

Alexia observed both players for a moment before breaking the tense silence. "Is there a problem here?" she asked, her voice firm as she approached them.

The Espanyol player immediately adopted a victim expression. "She just attacked me," she declared with false innocence.

Maya felt her blood boiling again. She lunged forward, but this time found herself contained by Alexia's arms, who firmly surrounded her, forcing her to step back.

"Mara," Alexia's voice was soft but firm as she pulled her away. "Mara, listen to me."

But Maya wasn't looking at her. Her eyes, burning with rage and frustration, were fixed on the Espanyol player, who smiled with satisfaction at her reaction. The mocking smile only served to fuel her fury more, while Alexia's arms kept her in place, her voice repeating what the captain believed to be her name like a calming mantra that she could barely hear over the roar of blood in her ears.

Alexia turned toward the blonde who still remained there, planted as if her feet had grown roots into the locker room floor. Their eyes met briefly before Alexia spoke.

"This isn't your dressing room," she said, her voice firm but controlled. "You have no business here."

No more needed to be said. The rookie—because that's what she clearly was, indicated by her insecure posture and the way her eyes nervously jumped from side to side—took a step back, then another, until finally turning around and disappearing through the door without a word.

Maya broke free from Alexia's grip as if her touch burned. "Don't touch me," she snapped, turning her back to continue packing her things in the sports bag. Her movements were abrupt, almost violent, as she stuffed her belongings one by one.

Alexia didn't move. She stayed there, observing every gesture, every tense movement of Maya's shoulders. The silence grew thick, almost tangible, until Maya couldn't bear it anymore. She could feel the older player's gaze drilling into the back of her neck.

"Am I in trouble?" she asked without turning around, her voice rough as sandpaper. The question hung in the air, a clear reference to the scene Alexia had just witnessed.

"You're Mara, right?" Alexia responded, deliberately ignoring the question.

Maya snorted, turning just enough to throw her a sideways glance. "Why ask if you're so sure you know?"

"Are you always this defensive?"

Alexia's question went unanswered. Maya returned to her task, stuffing her shin guards into the bag with more force than necessary. The locker room sank into silence interrupted only by the rustle of clothing and the metallic clicking of zippers.

"I saw you playing today," Alexia broke the silence again. "You're good."

Maya's hands stopped for an instant. It was Alexia Putellas saying it, after all. The same Alexia whom all the team's girls idolized, whose name was synonymous with excellence in women's football.

"Thanks," Maya mumbled, so low it almost seemed the words had been carried away by the locker room's air conditioning.

"But it doesn't matter how good you are," Alexia continued, "if you can't control your temper, you won't get anywhere."

Those words were like a switch. Maya spun around, her blue eyes shining with indignation. "I don't have any temper or anything to control."

"Well, that's not what I saw when I walked in," Alexia responded with a calmness that markedly contrasted with Maya's agitation.

"You don't know anything," Maya rolled her eyes, but the gesture didn't entirely hide the tension in her jaw.

Alexia tilted her head, studying the younger player's face. She observed how the furrowed brow made her freckle-sprinkled nose wrinkle slightly. There was something fascinating about that rebellion. She sat on the bench, the wood creaking softly under her weight.

"Then enlighten me," she said, leaning forward. "What was happening with that girl?"

"And why exactly should I tell you?"

The question made the corners of Alexia's lips curve slightly. It was refreshing, she had to admit. While most young players looked at her with a mixture of nervousness and reverential admiration, Maya seemed immune to her presence. There was no trace of typical adulation in her eyes, just a direct, unfiltered challenge.

Alexia rose from the bench with a fluid movement, running her palms over her pants in an automatic gesture. "You really are good, Mara," she said, heading toward the door. "Try not to let it go to your head."

She was about to leave when a murmur reached her ears.

"It's Maya."

Alexia stopped dead in her tracks. "Excuse me?"

"It's not Mara, it's Maya," the young player repeated, her voice clearer this time, though she still had her back turned.

"Maya," Alexia repeated, nodding slightly before crossing the doorway, leaving behind a silent locker room and a Maya who, for the first time since the exchange began, allowed her shoulders to relax.

[403tarot]

HOW TO BRING LOVE TO YOUR LIFE?

close your eyes and take a deep breath to choose the photo that calls you the most. take what resonates with you and leave the rest. answer in keep reading <3

PICK A PILE!

PILE 1

you have high expectations when it comes to love. even if you haven’t experienced great romantic adventures, you believe in love and deeply long for it. you expect love to arrive with a grand entrance, like the person destined for you will come with confetti and a flashing red neon sign above their head. besides that, you might have the false idea that love should be linear.

the reality is that you need autonomy to go after the love you want to experience. the perfect prince or princess is unlikely to just fall into your lap while you stay at home or turn your nose up at everyone when you go out. give love a chance to happen. don’t lower your standards, but recognize that people can change and adapt to you, and that in itself is a sign of love. go after what’s yours; take initiative instead of just waiting for it to come to you!

PILE 2

you are someone who, in recent times, has developed a strong sense of opinion and distinct personality traits. you may have used a particular event in your life or even the new year as a way to change how you act and think. however, your emotional side still needs healing before you’re truly ready to enter a relationship. you might have difficulty recognizing and valuing love, even if it were right in front of you.

you have internal battles to resolve. you might be dealing with inconsistencies or uncertainties about your future, and that disrupts the balance of other areas of your life. you need to prepare your emotional foundation so you can fully embrace love when it’s ready to come to you. strengthen your self-esteem, individual goals, and mental well-being so that your love path can open up again.

PILE 3

you've been through experiences that made you close yourself off when it comes to emotions. loss of trust, frustration, disappointment, or past situations have caused you to withdraw and shift your perspective on love. you’re not sure if love is really meant for you, and you might even wonder if your cupid got lost along the way.

even so, love is very close to crossing your path, and that’s why you need to open your heart so this person coming into your life can find you. pay attention to the signs and the movement happening around you this year. work on yourself internally to become more open and less hesitant when someone approaches you, and reclaim your autonomy in love. love is going to come to you shockingly faster than you expect.

PILE 4

you’re not sure if you really want to be in a relationship. you might have moments of loneliness, but when you think about it, a relationship could mean a level of commitment you’re unsure you can maintain. maybe you’ve had a rough history in love, like a painful breakup or a situationship that shook your confidence and openness to relationships. it’s possible that you haven’t fully healed yet.

the cycle of suffering is over, and it’s time to leave what happened behind. not forget, but not let those things become obstacles in your path. you don’t need to be in a relationship to experience love. allow yourself to connect with people. don’t focus only on seeking relationships, but give value to meaningful connections. not every encounter has to lead to a relationship. let yourself live freely and embrace new adventures. your mind needs rest.

PILE 5

there might be someone around you who has feelings for you. whether you suspect it or not, or whether this person has revealed their emotions yet, it's likely that this will come to light in the near future.

this might be someone you don’t currently see as a potential partner, but they genuinely care about you and will show concern for your feelings and well-being. it’s up to you to decide whether you want to give this person a chance to become something more in your life.

PILE 6

you like romance and the idea of committing to someone, but your interest can fade just as quickly as it appears. you might have rushed into relationships, only to realize soon after that they didn’t make sense for you, leaving you in an emotional mess. it can be hard to trust your own feelings for someone since they tend to be volatile and unpredictable. this makes you hesitant, wondering if anyone will ever truly hold your attention and emotions.

the advice here is actually a warning. be careful with karma and emotional irresponsibility towards others, because if you’re not mindful, it will come back to you in the form of a deep emotional blow when you least expect it. watch out for love bombing (both from you and others). slow down and learn to live one moment at a time, without the anxiety of trying to plan a future with someone you’re merely getting to know. love may come to you in a way that seems casual at first, but over time, it will strengthen and develop into deeper, more mature feelings, leading to a relationship that actually makes sense.

IMPORTANT!

this reading was done with the guidance of pombo gira menina, an entity known as a protector and guardian of children and teenagers, a sorceress who masters the charm and magic of love. she holds strength and healing power and stands as a defender of the helpless and those who suffer injustices and sexual abuse. if this reading resonated with you, give a small thank you by shouting: LAROYE POMBO GIRA MENINA!

you can also get a personalized love divination reading for 25% off the regular price until the end of march. check out my price list at the bottom of this post here!

[aquamystic]

what kind of trope will your next relationship be like?

hiiii! i am back again trying to help you romanticize your life because reality kinda... sucks sometimes SO let's bring some cool romantic tropes and see what your next relationship will be like!! remember that it is mostly to have fun and - again - to appreciate the beauty of our life!! 🌷 basically, if your next love story was a movie, what kind of trope would it be?

it will not speak to everyone so just let it go! 🧚🏻‍♀️

choose the picture you feel most called to or that sparks a memory! 💫

pile 1.

enemies to lovers. hot passionate tension. strong disgust yet incredible chemistry. constant fighting and feeling like fate is against you. you both have tempers and you enjoy annoying the others, especially when it comes to what you believe in. there is some opposition between your views on life and that creates exciting debates. slowly, you will both realize your feelings but all this tension and an external situation will make you deny all those feelings - although the sexual tension is hard to ignore. your lover is fiery, aggressive, hot, passionate, fun. before completely exploring all this chemistry, you are separated by fate and you try to convince yourself that it does not matter, that you do not care - but you do. it feels like you have not been able to really live it, to fully enjoy it and it feels bitter. but you will start to fight for it because you will both realize that this potential is rare to find and that it can’t just go to waste. the electricity when you touch them can’t be ignored and just forgotten. so you fight for it. they might help you heal your inner child, let you loosen up a little and well, they will appreciate you in your worst state because they will be very much aware of your WORST side but you will realize that someone loves you in your worst and that feels very healing.

pile 2.

age difference or one of them has not lived as much as the other. spiritual experience. soulmate kind of love. adrenaline. feeling complete - finally. perhaps someone who is of a different ethnicity. one of the two is younger or less mature but brings so much energy and life to the older / more mature one who gets to share all his experiences. very passionate and loving. love at first sight even. something is preventing them to reunite but the younger one is ready to rise above society’s expectations that appear dull and dumb. risking everything together and going on crazy adventures. also, impossible love because of hierarchy : a royal, a servant or a boss, a subordinate. discovering what life really is about together. your love story will feel like a hurricane, you or your person will just storm into your life and destroy every conceptions and representations you have of love and even of life. one of the two is very unpredictable but they have a heart of gold while the other feels very much broken (i was listening to the shining by the neighbourhood and the lyrics stuck for this group). one of the two could feel like they have the weight of the world on their shoulders and bam, here arrives this little ball of energy who lives life to the fullest. very refreshing love, like a breath of fresh air.

pile 3.

i hate everyone but you and everyone hates me but you. two people against the world. no one can defy us. the other is their home. could also be a third-party situation : one of them is the conventionally attractive love interest you are supposed to fall in love with but this other person… there is something about them you can’t deny. they are better than most humans you know. they are all you care about. the decision is taken but others do not agree with this. you are a powerful queen, rich and destined to compromise for your country. but there is this one person - enemy of the nation, old friend of lesser condition - that you feel is your real lover deep within. they are your home. the solution to your loneliness. the remedy to your broken heart. feeling guilty because of all those expectations on you. but you can’t listen to them, you want to feel selfish and listen to your heart. maybe you will break their heart at first - or the other way around - and you will have some time apart before reuniting. maybe they are a childhood friend you lost too, someone you hurt. but after this loss and hurt, you will be regretting and when you see them again… wow, all the anger, frustration and love will resurface. it will take some time again but at the end, you will be together and it feels like life is finally complete.

[divinesangel]

— how does your destined person feel about you right now? [detailed]

pm me for an affordable, in-depth personal reading! — 𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐚 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞!

— 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟏

current energies: it's quite likely that this person is going through a lot right now, which is causing them to overthink and have so much on their mind. they seem to have been overthinking many things in their life that they’re still trying to figure out. they’re probably talking to others and getting advice, but deep down, they know it’s something they have to work on and figure out on their own. a lot has been weighing on their mind, especially when it comes to connections. it’s likely that they’re ending cycles or bringing closure to situations that have caused them pain or emotional turmoil. they want to put an end to that, and now they’re carrying the burdens that come with closure and moving on. even though it might sometimes feel overwhelming, they understand that this isn’t the end of the world. they believe that better things are ahead, and as long as they stay persistent and know how to play their cards, they’ll get through this. there are many things in this person’s life that they want to move on from because they know it’s not doing them any good, and it’s just affecting their mental health and well-being. these days, they’ve been focusing on taking care of themselves, paying attention to their own feelings and their heart. but sometimes, they feel conflicted about how to feel about certain people. it seems like they’ve gone through some really painful moments with others, and now they’re unsure how to think about it all. part of them craves a sense of justice, wanting those people to get what they deserve. but there’s also a part of them that’s naturally kind, trying to brush it off and move forward.

feelings: this person wants to be with you as soon as possible. they’re really excited to meet you and already have so much love for you. they constantly wonder who their distant person is, what you’re going to be like, how you’ll look, and if you’ll love them as much as they’ll love you. there’s so much affection and tenderness they hold for you, and it’s something they can’t wait to give. they don’t just want to give you their emotional side, but also their material side. they want to provide for you, give you everything you need, and buy you whatever you want. i feel that once you meet, this person will be quick to show you how they feel. they won’t just express it through words or affection but also through actions. this is someone who will make you feel deeply loved and show you just how much you deserve it. they’re very caring, very nurturing, especially when it comes to a connection as strong as yours, which feels almost like a soulmate bond. they’ll feel even more sure about pursuing you and moving forward with you. you make this person feel incredibly stable. when they think of you, there’s this sense that they’re already complete, that they’ve become the person they want to be. the thought of you brings them a deep sense of stability, likely because they already know this connection will be something special. they feel happiness when they think about it, and they know that meeting you will be a turning point in their life. they’re aware that they’re going through some rough patches in their life right now, but the thought of you brings them so much peace. they know that when they finally get to be with you, they’ll find the happiness they’re searching for.

— 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟐

current energies: this person has been learning to feel more comfortable with themselves and finding contentment with what they have. it seems they’ve recently gone through situations that left them with a sense of lack, and now they’re trying to put the pieces back together. because of this, they’re beginning to realize their potential and finding emotional satisfaction from within, rather than seeking it externally. it’s likely that they’ve had a recent epiphany—a lightbulb moment—that shifted their perspective. they’re determined to leave behind past pains and situations they no longer want to deal with. this self-realization, that they deserve more and deserve to be happy, has sparked active changes in their life. they are very perseverant, and when they want something or are sure about it, they fight for it. they won’t let go unless they no longer feel like pursuing it or something significant happens. i feel like these days this person has been feeling quite confused about whether to pursue certain things or to let them go. it seems like they’re having a hard time distinguishing between what’s worth fighting for and what no longer has a solution. since they’re someone who really believes in fighting for what they want, it clashes with the idea of letting go. however, they’re starting to realize that there are aspects of themselves they need to change before moving forward with something new. right now, they’re in a phase of trying to understand that.

on the other hand, they’re also focused on creating a better environment for themselves, which involves their personal connections and friendships. they’re paying close attention to their circle of friends and acquaintances. it seems like there are some connections that have changed and no longer feel the same. they’re trying to figure out how to take action in this situation and how to let go of these feelings. deep down, they know that to feel better about these connections, they’ll need to let certain people go. overall, they haven’t been feeling their most stable, and they’re working through this to make things work in their favor. i'm hearing they might be attending someone's wedding too.

feelings: this person feels that your connection could be quite life-changing for them. it’s one of the things that draws them to you and makes them feel a deep, perhaps unconscious, attraction. however, when it comes to love, they might not be in the best place right now. they’ve grown up in an environment where those around them may not have been the best influences. because of this, they might have some toxic tendencies or have been involved with toxic people that they still need to move on from.

this awareness makes them think about you a lot. they are very conscious of the people they surround themselves with and the issues they need to leave behind. they worry that you might not like them because of their past or because of who they are now. they often find themselves wondering, "will they leave me once they get to know me better?" or "will they not want me because of my past behavior?" these worries definitely cross their mind whenever they think about you. in their heart, they truly want to give you everything they can, but they wonder if you will view this connection as fair, or if you’ll see their life as one that has been lived fairly. they don’t want to overwhelm you with all these details, so it’s likely they’ll open up to you gradually over time. they know some of their past actions weren’t ideal, and they feel regret and a bit of shame about that. they just hope you’ll still see them in a positive light once they share everything with you.

they’ve already been thinking about becoming the best version of themselves, but they need a bit of support or motivation to fully move out of their current mental state. they’ve been planning how to make these changes, so it’s just a matter of time before they put their plans into action. they’re really looking forward to this connection and have thought about you many times. they’re trying to stay optimistic about your future together and envision the best possible scenario. they’re aiming to avoid any negative thoughts, and they feel that once they’re around you and can communicate more, they’ll be able to express themselves fully and honestly. "i don't want to let them go" is how they'll feel.

— 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟑

current energies: this person has recently wrapped up a very challenging situation. they’re going through a lot of endings right now, which is a bit uncomfortable for them, but they understand it’s for their highest good. it seems they’ve just ended a connection with someone they cared about deeply. however, they discovered that this person had been deceptive or dishonest, and once these secrets came to light, they decided to cut ties abruptly. this person is very confident and tends to sever connections quickly when they feel wronged or when a situation is no longer beneficial. they don’t dwell on their feelings but focus more on the other person’s actions.

right now, they’re very practical and are concentrating on their stability and finances. they seem to be working hard on a project or business venture that’s aimed at increasing their financial security. this project might be in its early stages but has been on their mind for some time, or it's an idea they’ve wanted to bring to life for a while. they have a strong grasp of how to navigate life and make the most of each situation, which can be quite impressive. they’re aware that not all situations will be ideal, but they believe it depends on how one reacts and how much one lets it affect them. in addition, their perspective of the world might be influenced by their travels or interactions with people from various countries, which is likely tied to their business. they’re feeling very content with their current state and the place they’re in. they’re fulfilled with how they’ve handled things and how everything has turned out so far. however, as i mentioned at the beginning of the reading, they’re going through something emotionally. being a hard-working and somewhat workaholic person, this might serve as their escape. they’re so adept at what they do and at coming up with great ideas that their work becomes a refuge from their emotional struggles. the validation they receive from others provides a sense of relief and makes them feel better about themselves. when they get positive feedback or when their projects succeed, it feels like the most important thing to them, overshadowing everything else. while they’re currently satisfied with their position, i wonder how much more they can handle, as they’re already carrying some burdens.

feelings: when it comes to their feelings towards you and your connection, they feel a strong desire to manifest whatever it is that you want. they are working to feel as stable as possible so they can give you what you deserve, both emotionally and physically. however, there’s a part of them that questions whether they truly deserve someone like you. they wonder if they are worthy of you and this has them feeling quite conflicted.

they have strong feelings for you, but they also grapple with self-doubt about whether they’re deserving of this connection. they want to keep you close, not in a possessive way, but out of a genuine desire to protect and cherish you. having been alone for a long time or having had less fulfilling connections in the past, they worry about whether they will know how to handle a relationship with someone like you.

stability is very important to them, and they value it not only for themselves but also for their partner, especially emotionally. when it comes to your upcoming meeting, they will likely feel overwhelmed and stressed, but this is more about their own nerves than anything related to you. they will be anxious about what to say or do, but they are also looking forward to seeing how things will unfold. they believe that things will happen in their own time, and once you both achieve closure and fulfill what you need in your lives, everything will fall into place and manifest as it should.

𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 !

hi! it's daphne here.

i'm currently offering personal readings for €7 and soulmate readings for €14 so don't hesitate to send me a private message if you're interested!

thank you for being here!

[helslastangel]

Random Astro Placement Observations

Original individual posts combined into this single post. Based on personal interpretation. If it doesn't apply, LET IT FLY. Enjoy.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Uranus in Aquarius in 1H

-Free-spirited and eccentric with a unique way of thinking and inspiring change

-Does not care to conform to societal norms; wants to carve their own path

-Others associate their unconventional approach with leadership potential

-Highly innovative and good at communicating their ideas to others

-May endure setbacks and unforeseen changes in their life; unpleasant surprises

-Can fall into a rut if their progress is interrupted too drastically and too often

-Can appear to be attention-seeking at times, especially in dress and mannerisms

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Jupiter Sextile Neptune in Synastry

-These two dream together so well that they might as well be lost in Wonderland.

-The Jupiter person hates stagnancy and always wants to be growing, expanding outwards into who-knows-where.

-The Neptune person has a huge imagination and enjoys venturing into the unknown, even if only through the mind.

-When the Jupiter person gets stuck in a rut, unable to think of a path forward, the Neptune person floats in to whisper a little random something in their ear that revives the spark and saves the day.

-The benefits don't only go one way either, when the Neptune person gets lost in all the mist in their head, unable to act on anything, the Jupiter person can gallop in to hoist them up above the fog and carry them forward to a real destination.

-That is, assuming they both don't start having too much fun poking holes in the clouds instead.

-A risk with this aspect is that both people could end up enabling each other's inaction and being too content to build castles in the sky if they're not careful. But if they keep an eye on that, this can be an incredibly creative pair who will never grow bored with each other.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Pluto Trine Ascendant

-Projects a strong outer appearance even when feeling the exact opposite inside

-Charismatic people who others find attractive or at least intriguing

-Can be blunt but are perceived by others as charming and "just being honest"

-Shares what they want to; hides their life from the public eye without trying

-Can leave others feeling left in the dark or excluded from their inner circle.

-May be the subject of many rumors; some true, some false

-Others assume this person is healthier, wealthier, or more popular than they are

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Sun Sextile Mars

-With Sun Sextile Mars in your natal chart, you are brave, full of energy and often look young for your age. Some of you might be into sports or some kind of intense activities (dancing, martial arts, rock climbing, HIIT, etc.).

-If you’re more of a homebody, you could be the type to engage in causes online, standing up for endangered or marginalized beings.

-People might hit on you often or even if not, you might have a little trouble with the people who DO show interest in you mainly being interested in sex. At least, at first. Depending on your personal preferences and other placements, this may or may not be a problem.

- You’re the type of person who can work equally well alone or in a group, though you may prefer solo work if the groups you end up in can’t keep up with your energy.

-You’re usually popular and make friends very easily, though your direct way of speaking can rub some people the wrong way. However, people get used to you and quickly overlook this, as your honest nature and authenticity is very refreshing for most.

-The dynamic between you and your father/father-figure may be unique or just noticeably strong in some way. Others may often describe you as a “chip off the old block,” “Daddy’s girl” or some other phrase that highlights this connection.

-This can also go either way - You may have a positive or negative relationship with the masculine parent, it will just be a strong one regardless.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Neptune Trine Lilith

-Unafraid of things others find controversial, extreme or taboo

-Tend to be open (or at least comfortable) with their sexuality

-Highly expressive and does not bend to societal expectations

-Refuses to be controlled or held back by anyone but themselves

-Surprises others with their unconventional, free-spirited approach to spirituality

-Met with curiosity and acceptance rather than scorn for their views

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Mercury in Libra

-You're diplomatic and fair, but also take forever to make up your mind.

-People love you for the way you consider everyone's point of view, but it's okay to have your own opinion and stand on it too.

-Your partners love you because you'll never embarrass them in public.

-You believe in a united front and will stand by those you love in public and correct them in private.

-Somehow you have the best advice. Even if you don't always take it yourself.

-One thing about you, you're gonna make a list of pros and cons.

-Your voice is so smooth and sexy. People fall in love with the way you sound and you don't even know it.

-Your friends call you when they can't sleep, and not in a bad way. You're just so calming to listen to that it takes their stress away.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Sun Trine Moon

-You are popular and generally likable, but may be somewhat private or secretive.

-Others see you as someone who has mastered the balance between showing humility and displaying confidence. This fact alone makes you so much more attractive to others.

-Speaking of attraction, people are often attracted to the sense of security they feel around you. You're generally easygoing, or at least you try to appear that way.

-Harmony is important to you and you'll go lengths to maintain it. It can be difficult for you to understand people who seem to be at war with themselves, because your own ideals and feelings are rarely at odds.

-If there aren't enough challenging aspects in your chart to make you more familiar with inner conflict, you could find yourself becoming avoidant and sweeping things under the rug or delaying tough conversations with others.

-People think you know what you’re talking about, even if you don’t. There’s an aura of “knowing” about you and may often be picked to lead teams or call the shots in some way. This can be either flattering or annoying, depending on whether you enjoy being in charge.

-You’re a friendly person and avoid conflict, but you can certainly defend yourself if necessary and others are sometimes surprised when a more firm side of your personality comes out. Overall though, you're most likely to live and let live whenever possible.

-You can be extremely accepting of others and yourself, but sometimes to a fault. It's a good idea to get in the habit of questioning things or seeking out perspectives on life that are different from your own.

-Family can be your Achille's heel as you’ll put up with things from loved ones that you’d never tolerate from anyone else.

-There are many things you’re good at, but you’re unlikely to brag. Your efforts may go unnoticed for a short time simply because you never bring them up and don’t point out anything you’ve done to anyone.

-You may embody the sentiment of “if it doesn’t affect me, then it doesn’t bother me." Can have an easier time achieving goals since emotions won't get in the way.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Sagittarius Sun in 11H

-Optimistic and freedom-loving; constantly seeking adventure

-May be a strong presence in their social circle, if not the leader

-Values friendship highly and wants to work/live/travel with friends

-Can be idealistic but surrounds themselves with people who think differently and can offer varying perspectives

-Could be involved in social justice matters and be a voice for change

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Sun Sextile Mercury in Synastry

-Conversations between the Sun person and the Mercury person are lively and extremely enjoyable for both of them.

-These are the friends or partners who can easily spend hours on the phone or facetime, talking about anything and everything under the sun from why humans speak so many different languages to what color socks goes with what outfit.

-The Sun person brings new concepts and raw perspectives to the conversation, which the Mercury person is all too happy to process and put into the best combination of words.

-This aspect is especially sweet for pairs who have compatible hobbies or skills/professions, e.g. a singer/musician and a writer/poet, or a web/software developer and a copywriter.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Ascendant Conjunct Uranus

-Original thinkers who can usually back up their ideas with actions

-Like to be around open-minded, progressive types of people

-Love to play the devil's advocate; can rebel or argue for the sake of it

-Others view them confident and creative, yet also eccentric

May sabotage themselves by constantly trying to shock people

-Looks for partners who need freedom and personal space, like them

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Moon Conjunct Neptune

-You are highly imaginative and creative. Possibly a great storyteller who can take the most mundane experience and recast it in an interesting and theatrical light. This can make you popular and very well-liked by others.

-You might make an exceptional actor, whether professionally or in everyday life. Though if overdone, this trait can backfire and lead to you being loved for who you are not.

-This is rarely malicious on others' part: Neptune's misty illusions, combined with the changeable nature of the moon cause you to unintentionally fool others and sometimes yourself.

-Internally, you could be quite sensitive, but whether you wear this on your sleeve or conceal it depends on your moon sign and other aspects. Regardless, you often absorb all the energies in a room and constantly process everything you see and feel.

-Sometimes, it could feel like you have no idea where you end and others begin. Struggling with emotional boundaries can be a negative theme in your life if not balanced out by other aspects.

-People who do not this (or similar) placements can find it difficult to empathize with you and might spread rumors or make your personality a frequent topic of their conversations.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Venus Trine Saturn

-Extremely loyal; can be reserved and controlled in social settings

-Not obviously introverted or extroverted; quiet but not shy

-Usually attracted to older partners or people with mature energy

-Afraid of rejection but will try to hide this from others at all costs

-Highly determined when their mind is set to achieve something

-Can be creative and will usually finish the projects they start

-Blends structures with aesthetics well; may enjoy interior design

-Extremely responsible people who others look up to and rely on

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Juno in Scorpio

-While Venus may show how we fall in love and what traits attract us most, Juno shows what we truly need to feel safe and secure in a marriage or long-term partnership, regardless of what we're attracted to.

-In my case, I have both Venus and Juno in Scorpio, so there isn't much difference between what I need and what I desire in a partner. But some may not be so fortunate and experience a war with themselves.

-Juno in Scorpio natives like an element of mystery around their relationships. The allure of having a whole other side to their lives behind closed doors that the public knows nothing about.

-Traditionally ruled by Mars, Scorpio approaches emotion with a lot of passion and a sense of urgency. When Juno is placed in this sign, the natives can experience intense power dynamics with the object of their affection. A fear of betrayal and obsession with loyalty is also present.

-Scorpio Juno people NEED depth in their relationship, otherwise they will fall out of love. If they cannot connect deeply with their lover for any reason, they will do everything possible to reestablish the bond.

-However, if their partner makes no effort to restore the connection, they can often grow to hate their partner just as deeply as they once loved them. Depending on the rest of their chart, they may either stay in the relationship out of obligation, but entertain secret affairs, or they may sever the relationship entirely and seek another, or become celibate and closed off to relationships entirely.

-Scorpio Juno people will not be happy with anything less than a true soulmate relationship. Despite being slow to open up themselves, they desire partners who are trusting, loyal and unafraid to show vulnerability.

-The ride or die type of relationship is usually the only kind of relationship these natives feel truly satisfied in. They can often find this kind of connection in people with whom they have Juno-Mars, Juno-Venus, Juno-Sun, or Juno-Sun synastry, or people with significant/many planets in Scorpio.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Ascendant Conjunct Mars

-Cares about others but does not over-identify with their emotions.

-Can spend hours trying to figure out why everyone else is so upset.

-Joyful (unless depressed) but also impulsive and easily angered

-Comes on strong, which thrills some and overwhelms others.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Venus Conjunct Jupiter

-You’re a gentle peacemaker. Aggression and conflict grieve your spirit in ways that words can’t express.

-Harsh personalities can drive you to step out of character yourself, so you tend to seek out agreeable people to be friends with. This isn’t difficult as you’re generally popular in your social circles unless other placements in your chart suggest otherwise.

-Anytime there is a dispute, you’re likely to walk away or try to delay getting into the argument.

-You may be physically attractive, but the brightest aspect of your appeal is how affectionate you are to those you care for. Unless depressed or otherwise weighed down by circumstance, your presence is naturally cozy and very soothing to others, even if you don’t quite understand why.

-Others can see and feel the warm aura that surrounds you and makes them feel like anywhere with you is a safe space.

-Another thing you may notice is that people open up to you very easily, telling you all about their dreams, hopes, aspirations and other things that you wouldn’t normally discuss with a stranger.

-You also may be extremely creative, whether in the way that you think and dream, or in the things that you do (music, design, writing, dance, poetry, etc). This is one of the more promising aspects for love and relationships, and these may come relatively easily without too much effort on your part.

-Of course, for every dawn there is dusk: you may be rather lazy, self-indulgent, and greedy, if not careful to keep your desires under control. However, with a bit of self-reflection and determination to improve, you will get along in life just fine.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Moon Trine Venus in Synastry

-If your Moon trines someone's Venus (or the other way around), you could have more compassion for each other than for other people.

-There will be a strong emotional connection between you.

-Others might complain that you let each other get away with everything, lol.

-There's an unspoken "handle with care" vibe between you that's very sweet.

-It can be hard to suppress this vibe if being close with that person is wrong or taboo in some way (e.g. coworkers, boss, etc.).

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Mars Opposite Neptune

-May try to present an image that fits the social expectations of their environment instead of their current reality (esp. with 1H Mars).

-Tends to hide internal insecurities with external confidence that may seem unnatural or "fake"

-Depending on where Neptune is placed, certain people or places will appear to be safe, leading the native to reveal themselves more clearly, only to find out it was a trick.

-People who can see past their brave façade will either try to be safe space for then, or will study their insecurities to take advantage of them

-Can be a prime target for energy vampires, narcissists, etc., if unhealthy/unevolved

-They are a frequent topic of discussion in their social groups; can be positive in some cases or if other aspects outweigh this one, but with mars opposing neptune, these natives are usually gossiped about/slandered more than anything else

-Their morals/ethics can appear questionable to others due to Neptune's influence clouding the native's good intentions and honest motivations behind their actions.

-They may notice that people often accuse them of being sneaky or seeming "sus" without being able to give any real reason.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Venus Square Jupiter

-Highly motivated to create things, but often lacks the right skill set to do so

-May try to sooth their frustration by spending large sums to own luxury goods

-Draws others in with their playful, mildly risky sense of humor

-Makes friends easily but can lose them all to long periods without contact, irreconcilable differences in religion or politics, or generally drifting apart

-Charming and fun to be around, but can be extremely selfish in connections

-Often has lonely spells because their loved ones find them too demanding

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Saturn in Pisces

-You may be hard on yourself and not see your talents and abilities for what they truly are. Learning to trust your intuition and nurture self-confidence will help a lot.

-You could tend to hold on to the past and have trouble letting pain go. Often paranoid or defensive as a means of self-protection

-Highly compassionate and may be extremely practical too, Can struggle to draw the line where you end and others begin.

-You are patient and will often forgo your own comfort in the present to help others or to achieve a greater good in the future

-Usually artistic, or highly appreciative of artistic traits and creations from others

-Might turn to religion or some other kind of spirituality for structure and faith in life

-Your feet can give trouble, perhaps pain in the bones or issues with walking/gait

-You're sensitive and feel vulnerable or unprotected in life, even if you don't admit it.

-Victim or martyr complexes are common if not avoided through self-reflection and overcoming negative thoughts and emotions

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Mercury in Leo in 12H

-Can have a dramatic or over-confident way of speaking

-Very charismatic, enthusiastic; impossible for others to ignore

-Wants to be noticed and admired for the things they choose to say- May share their thoughts and opinions often hoping for feedback

-Sometimes aloof, reserved; struggles to express certain emotions

-Might keep part of themselves locked away from others at all times

-Tends to explore their environment more than their inner world

-Could have sporadic issues with short-term memory or comprehension

-Too much overthinking can lead to depression and self-imposed isolation

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Neptune Opposite Ascendant

-You might not have a set persona and will appear one way today and completely different tomorrow.

-It's possible that your appearance, mannerisms, and speech change drastically from one day to the next.

-Others may see you as a shapeshifter or even deceptive in some way. At best, you're generally unpredictable and confusing to those around you.

-Only a few can see clearly through the fog without you having to explain yourself. These people often become your best friends or even romantic partners.

-You give off varying auras at different times to different people so it's not uncommon people with this aspect to have one set of friends who know them to be one way, and others who know them to completely different.

-E.g. seeming reserved or shy in one friend group, naïve and innocent in another, mysterious and dark with a 3rd, outgoing and free-spirited with others, etc.).

-Depending on your personal tolerance for chaos, you may spend an enormous amount of time and energy keeping your friends/friend groups from ever meeting each other.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Sun Conjunction Mercury

-The self is expressed in a natural, flowing way; charismatic and a great talker

-May enjoy intellectual topics but struggle to be objective about them

-Connects well with other as they easily & quickly adjust their tone and delivery

-Talks more than listens, easily distracted unless others are equally engaging

-Great public speakers, writers, etc., but can be unreliable and procrastinating

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Jupiter Opposite Sun in Synastry

-This can signal a difference of opinion between you and your partner on key topics, such as religion, philosophy, politics, etc.

-This does not have to be a bad thing, but it can cause conflict between partners with strong egos who aren't so invested in making things work.

-But if both are committed to going the distance with each other, they should hear each other out and see their differences as opportunities to learn and grow together.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Mars Trine Neptune

-Highly creative; can bring fantasies to life in some shape or form

-Usually cultured and can hold their own in a variety of environments

-Action-oriented, yet charming and persuasive; liked by others

-Quick to defend those who cannot defend themselves

-Has knowledge of theoretical things, but struggles in day-to-day life

-Could easily become a starving artist due to their impracticality

-May seek partnerships with people who possess life skills they lack

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Moon Conjunct Uranus

-Requires a lot of personal space and almost total freedom. Highly independent and hates relying on others for anything or being misjudged.

-Has a busy aura or a buzzing kind of underlying energy, even at rest, but is easily drained emotionally. People view them as unpredictable and hard to pin down.

-May be called energizer bunny or simply get lots of comments from people telling them to relax/slow down, even when they're not doing anything.

-Can inspire others easily, from the small things like getting chores/assignments done, to the big things like career changes, moving overseas, starting a business or relationship, etc.

-Lives life completely on their own terms; very unhappy if forced to submit to anyone else's agenda

-Has strong words for those who try to control or "fix" them; will only befriend the most open-minded people.

-May seem open and like the type to wear their heart on their sleeve, but are quite detached and show only what they want others to see

-Prone to conceal their true emotional state and convince themselves and others that they've said how they felt when they have. Hold things in until they inevitably explode.

-Can be stubborn or not like being told what to do, but makes up for it with their conversational charm and quick-thinking/problem-solving abilities

-Wants to be included and important to the family (biological or otherwise) but does not want to held hostage or smothered by others' emotional demands

-Can become very restless if life becomes too dull/stagnant. Needs constant stimulation and may spend a lot of time consuming media on the Internet.

-Might feel differently about things from one moment to the next. Highly impulsive

-Starts new friendships/relationships with a lot of passion and attentiveness; struggles to keep this up long-term; often accused of becoming nonchalant

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Mercury Conjunct Pluto

-Seeks challenges; does not like to deal with anything that is too easy

-Persuasive speakers who convince others with flawless arguments

-Can be extremely stubborn and believe that they are alright right

-May study psychology or be more interested in the topic than most

-Highly diplomatic; they would rather sway than slay their opponent

-Quick, but chaotic thinkers. Others find it hard to keep up with them

-Naturally inclined to the sciences; easily notices causes and effects

-Leaves no stone unturned; will not try to escape their problems

-Can be somewhat overzealous in communication and alienate friend

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Chiron in 3H

-Might talk a little too much at all the wrong times. Even if the quieter type, they can end up oversharing without realizing it, which might not be the worst thing in the world if they are generally popular and well-liked, but it can be devastating if people already don't like them before they even open their mouths.

-Regardless of social standing, they can have problems in the workplace if they reveal the wrong things to the wrong people. Either getting into hot water with HR because of the way someone interpreted the things they said, or losing opportunities for promotion because something got back to a manager and ruined their reputation.

-Often, these people had social problems in childhood that never got resolved and continue to follow them into adulthood. A lot of it has to do with not being listened to and feeling ignored or like they had to outdo themselves constantly to be noticed. This often leads to people pleasing or becoming clingy with anyone who shows (or appears to show) genuine interest in them as a person.

-People with this placement can go from being the chatterbox or trauma dumping friend to being THAT person who everyone goes to for advice or even just to listen to because of the interesting stories and thoughts you have to share.

-People with Chiron in the 3rd house can overcome the negative aspects of this placement by becoming more mindful of how quickly one gets comfortable with others. That's not to say you have to be standoffish or aloof, but just consider whether something really needs to be said before saying it. With time and practice, you can become an excellent and highly empathetic communicator who knows what to say and when to say it.

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

Natal Lilith Sextile Ascendant

- Can physically manifest in the native being extremely tall or short

-Often appears confident no matter how they really feel about themselves

-Usually gains genuine confidence and increased self-esteem with age

-Might enjoy saying or doing things that shock or surprise others

-Attracts sexual attention without intending to, or realizing others feel this way

-Can trigger very strong reactions in other people, especially if female/feminine

-May be shunned by the majority of women, or the topic of their conversations

-Misjudged by people who have no intention of getting to know them or the truth

˖°.🪐.ೃ࿔*:･

↤ go back to the masterlist

[sunderwight]

Imagine how much Shen Yuan and Airplane would hate it if an actual PIDW fan transmigrated in too, though.

Like, one of the guys who genuinely loved the stallion novel harem-building aspects, the weird-yet-vanilla het sex, the willingness to throw the plot out of the door just to have yet another interchangeable woman throw herself at the hero. Someone who only ever had nice things to say in the comment section, who unironically referred to Airplane as a master storyteller, who bought some of the VIP chapters (if he liked the wife Bingge was destined to wed & bed), couldn't name any of the monsters or sex flowers or most of the male side characters, had a Xin Mo keychain and once commissioned fan art of Sha Hualing (favorite wife) looking sexy in a pin-up pose, and told Peerless Cucumber he was a weirdo who took things too seriously on more than one occasion.

I think he'd bother Airplane the most. Shen Yuan would be annoyed and tell him his taste was in his ass, but that's about it.

But Airplane? I think at first he'd be inclined to enjoy having an uncomplicated "fan" of his work turn up. This guy actually praises him! He has nothing but flattering things to say! It's like a dream come true! Except... well, Airplane himself is perfectly aware of the decisions he made in his writing and why (he sold out deliberately, not because he thought it would actually make for a better story -- say what you will about whether or not it's worth it, but the man knows what he's doing), and also I suspect kind of resents his own popular audience whenever he has to interact with them for more than minute.

After all, these were the patrons he had to appease and appeal to, the readers he had to worry about offending or alienating, the ones who were paying the bills but also would have vanished at the drop of a hat if he hadn't given them a steady supply of what they wanted. It's not the audience he actually desired, it's the one he decided not to offend in order to maximize profitability. Peerless Cucumber might be a pain in the ass, but he's a pain in the ass who picked up on the story that Airplane himself originally intended to tell, and wanted PIDW to actually be that. Which has gotta be kind of gratifying, in a roundabout way.

I think it would stress Airplane out to have someone approve of the things he himself didn't even approve of. Like on the one hand this guy seems to have only a good opinion of him, but on the other hand it's based entirely on a false impression and Airplane actually agrees way more with Cucumber's assessment of his writing, because he wrote it badly on purpose. Since the guy has a good opinion, that's something Airplane can potentially lose, and he'd be most likely to lose it by revealing the truth about his own creative intentions and his actual tastes and inclinations. A ticking time bomb of disapproval that could go off at any moment to who-knows-what effect.

He'd hate it. Eventually every time User No.3 came around he'd just be like:

[ID: A gif of Skeletor from Masters of the Universe gliding through a blue magical barrier and then reaching back to punch and shatter it. End ID]

[thragedys]

CATCH A MOVIE

Sol x Reader

Synopsis: As planned yesterday, you, Sol, and Hyugo arranged to spend some quality time together. Just as you were about to reach the meet-up destination, you are stopped. It appears that plans have changed.

Word count: 3k

Includes: Sol x Gender neutral reader, implied heavy topics (if you have played the game, you will understand what is being referred to), soft Sol, kissing, disrupted intimacy

A/N: i recently purchased the kid at the back vn and adore it! very excited to see what it holds in the future

Planned the day before, you arranged to meet up with Hyugo and Sol on the rooftop for lunch. It’s becoming part of your routine, slowly distancing yourself from your past habits. As the seminar is dismissed, you quickly speed through the crowds of people, making your way up the stairs. Every step caused a creek, a snap, and potentially a crunch. This building is falling to pieces. Reaching the final few steps, you lean to grab the door handle.

…?

An arm extended from behind grabs you, prompting you to stiffen. With furrowed brows, you turn to meet the owner of the hand clutching yours, nerves settling as the familiar green hair sways all negative thoughts from your mind. Sol gazes at you from a lower step, his lips curving up as he watches your eyes soften.

“I thought you’d be out there.” You point to the door with your left hand, since your right is currently held captive by his.

“Change of plan,” Sol speaks clearly, his posture straighter than usual. His confidence is seemingly shining today.

“Did something happen?”

“What? No. Hyugo is… busy.”

The hesitation on the word “busy” suggests that what Sol has told you is not exactly the truth—or at least close to the full extent.

“He’s busy?”

“Yeah, busy. He told us to hang out without him, he’ll join us later.”

“Oh, all right then! What do you have in mind?”

“You told me you wanted movie recommendations, right?”

“I believe I did.”

“Well, I thought it’d be nice to… Watch one with you, like I said I would. My favorites are quite old, so…”

“Will they still be screened in the cinema?”

“About that. I have DVD collections at home, plus, it’ll be more comfortable. What do you think?”

Sucking your bottom lip in, you cross your arms and take into consideration his offer. Since your day is practically over, you have nothing better to do with your time. Due to what’s happening in the city, the better option is to not be alone.

“Okay, why not? It’ll be so much fun! I wonder what your place looks like.”

“It’s nothing fancy. Nothing like yours.” Forgetting himself, he pauses. A hot flush spread across his cheeks as he grabbed your forearm and dragged you down the stairs, continuing his sentence.

“—Your apartment building seems a lot nicer than mine is what I was supposed to say.”

“I’m sure it’s fine. It doesn’t matter where you live as long as you’re safe and have a roof over your head.” You smile at him, an innocent sparkle in your eyes.

“You’re too sweet.”

“A little bit of kindness can take you a long way.”

“There are a lot of people who prey on that kindness out here. Sometimes it’s better to be selfish.”

“As long as I have someone by my side, I’ll be fine.”

“I’ll always be—”

Before you could reach the exit, a voice called out from the distance. You spin your head and see Crowe with a pile of books held close to his chest, a pleasant expression on his face. Unlinking your fingers from Sol’s, you hear a scoff. His eyes burn with envy as he glares at Crowe from across the hall, his presence alone repulsing him. You walk towards him and Sol follows closely behind, barely leaving any space between your bodies.

“Hello again.” Crowe greets you, his gaze flicking up to Sol who looms over you.

“Hi! Are you okay?” You scrunch your brows together as you notice Crowe’s features contort into an unreadable emotion.

While it may appear as a mystery to you, from Crowe’s point of view, all he can see above you is the lasering hatred burning through his flesh, straight through his bones.

“Never mind. I’ll talk to you soon, you look busy.”

“We’re not in a ru—”

“Let’s go.”

Sol seems eager. There’s no need to stand around when the conversation is no longer ongoing. His fingers tap against your knuckles and your fist unclenches, allowing him to lock his hold. Firmly.

Deciding to leave that incident unquestioned, the walk back to Sol’s place was filled with conversation. His tone shifted from eerily deep to his usual, soothing voice.

Despite his earlier claims, his apartment building is far from shabby. With the way he made it out to be, you expected his living conditions to be much worse. His room is on the third floor, tucked way back down the hallway. When the door opened, you could instantly recognise who this home belonged to.

It was dark, curtains limiting any spot of sunlight from shining in. There were a few paint supplies littered all over the place—nothing overly messy. You slip your shoes off and hang your jacket by the entrance. Sol disappeared, likely into the bathroom or his bedroom. Wherever he is, it’s not your concern.

You should never snoop around someone else’s home, even if you’re far more than curious about a person.

Falling onto the sofa, your eyes dart to a notebook left on the arm. A few pieces of paper hang loosely out, all pages crumpled. Just as you are about to pick it up, footsteps catch your attention as he returns. His eyes subtly drift from your face to the book he carelessly left out, almost cursing himself for the situation he could’ve wound up in even if he were a second later.

“You can go into my bedroom, that’s where the TV is.” Sol musters a smile, forcing his lips to twist up as he slips past you and subtly relocates the book.

“Should I take my clothes off?”

“Wh—” His mouth opens partially, a violent pink spread across his cheeks, threatening to reach his ears if he doesn’t dispel the thoughts that just entered his mind.

“Ah! I meant because I’ve worn these clothes all day, I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to sit on your bed in them. If you have any spare, I wouldn’t mind changing.”

“Yeah… I’ll get you some.” It wasn’t something that he initially planned, but since you were the one who suggested it, who would he be to deny you?

Entering his bedroom, you take your time to look around. Some posters, a few albums, artwork—nothing you wouldn’t expect out of the ordinary from a regular man. Rummaging through his wardrobe, he pulls out a sweater he knows he has worn recently. His scent is trapped in the fabric since he has yet to tend to his laundry pile.

“Do you have any pants?” You add, cuddling the sweater tightly.

“It’ll be long enough to cover you. You can get under the blanket too.” Sol tilts his head askew, analysing your figure before you step out to strip.

It’ll be hard to process that he has you in his bed. Hard to resist. Hard to forget.

Upon your return, the sleeves of his sweater extend over your hands. It covers you well, rather skimpy, but nothing is revealed. He pats the mattress and you climb on, settling down on his pillows as he holds up the disk which contains the unknown movie.

“Do you want to take any guesses?”

“Uh, one of the Conjurings?”

“Session 9. Kind of underrated; it’s still good though.”

He inserted the disk into the DVD player and clicked start on the remote. It began, seemingly harmless like the beginning of a majority of horrors. Cautiously, Sol edges closer to you, slipping his arm around you and pulling you into his embrace. Your frame melted to his almost perfectly, your chin tilting up to see his features.

That put him in a tough position. Those eyes made his heartbeat spike, his body riddled with a chill. Lifting his hand, he held you in his palm, rotating your head to view you from a variety of angles. Your beauty does not decrease, no matter the position or amount of light that illuminates you.

“Is this scary?” You motion towards the TV, but he hums.

“Fear is subjective,” Those half-lidded eyes cause your body to heat up, his cheeks permanently tinted with a twinge of color. “But you have nothing to worry about.”

That was enough to reassure you. Along with his hands tightly wrapped around your waist, and the rhythmic sound of his heart beating close to your ear as you rest your head against his chest.

The movie played out, the psychological horror unfolding. It was perfectly directed, enough to invoke the correct amount of fear and curiosity, almost begging to discover more despite the eerie atmosphere of the asylum. While your attention was glued to the screen, his was stuck on you.

“Come on…” He mumbled to himself, his thumb pressed at the corner of your mouth.

“Hm?”

…

That look spoke for itself. His thumb slid across your bottom lip, pulling it down and letting it spring back up. If Sol wasn’t so handsome, perhaps it would be easier to suppress the feeling rising in your core. The movie drags on as background noise, losing yourself as he leans closer.

“You have scratches on the back of your hand.”

“Forget about them. They aren’t relevant.” His smile was pleasant, easing your investigative nature down before you could interrogate him. “We should do this more often. I like this. Seeing you in my clothes and all. You look comfy.”

“I’m really happy when I’m with you. I usually worry a lot when I’m alone, but—”

“I promise that you will never be alone even when you feel like you are. Stop letting all those negative thoughts into your pretty little head.”

“Sol will always come and save me if I’m ever in danger.” You grin, watching his smile transition to a smirk.

“Save you, yeah? That sounds good.” He rests his lips on your forehead, securing a peck before pulling back. “I’ll never need to save you again though. Fuck all of that, I’ve learned from those mistakes. You will never leave my sight.”

Your eyes widen as his nose presses against yours, gently rubbing them together. It was intimate yet also affectionate, an ideal combination to weaken you further. Though he was not immune, he was also crumbling.

“If you keep me safe, I’ll look out for you too. In any way I can.”

“You don’t need to, but I know what you’re like. You’ll do it either way.”

“Where are your plushies?” Your breath hits his face and he closes his eyes momentarily before reaching behind the pillows and pulling one out.

“I hid them, they’re here. This is my pony that Hyugo couldn’t keep his mouth shut about.” The plushie is clearly in well-loved condition, likely a source of comfort for Sol when he felt he had no one else to rely on.

“It’s very cute. It’s lucky.”

“Is it?”

“It gets to cuddle you. Probably every night.”

“You…” Sol can’t help but beam, his face a bright shade as he places the pony under his chin. “If you want to cuddle me every night, I’m not the one stopping you. Feel free.”

“I don’t get a lot of opportunities to.”

“We can make some opportunities then. How does that sound?”

“It sounds like a great plan. I’ll be waiting for more details.”

“When I cuddle,” Sol shifts, his hands on both sides of you, trapping you under him. “I like to get all of my emotions out. That’s something you should know.”

“I can handle that.”

“Can you?”

It didn’t sound like a question, more so a challenge. Pulling down the neckline of your sweater, he revealed the crook of your neck. Two of his fingers lightly rub against the faint bruise, almost captivated at the mark he left on you. You didn’t even know it was there, but he did.

He’ll make sure you know this time.

Dipping down, he connected his lips with the damaged skin. Your body shuddered from the sudden contact, his hand slowly travelling to your arm to pin you to the mattress. He opens his mouth, instinctively latching his teeth to you. It stung. The force his jaw clamped down on you was something you weren’t expecting, causing a cry to flee from your lips.

He wants this mark to stay. He’ll make sure it never has the opportunity to fade.

“Sol—”

Recognising that breathy call, he is quick to replace his rough actions with desperate kisses. Inhaling your scent only drove his urges wilder. It was almost animalistic, pure desire and drive. The way his tongue swirled around your wound almost felt like an apology for breaking through your skin.

When he pulled away, he smiled down at you. A display of sincere adoration. Your chest heaved, matching his. Breaths filled the silence of the room, the movie paused while the remote was discarded from the bed. Hoisting the blanket back, Sol revealed your legs which are tightly pressed together.

“Did it feel good?”

“Mm…” An agreeing sigh.

Prying your legs apart, he moves between them. Your face is cupped in his tarnished hands which somehow remained soft to the touch. You wondered how his lips would feel against yours, if they were soft too. It’s hard to deny the rouse of your emotions, your body is begging for something more.

It seemed like he read your mind, or perhaps your body language. His lips forced their way to yours, overpowering you in all physical ways. He was devouring you, craving you to silence the anguish he had been enduring.

It’s just not fair. You’re his, aren’t you? Why should he have to watch as other people attempt to make their moves on you? It enraged him, they have no respect. You were never anyone else’s, only his.

His hands began to tremble, the full weight of his body collapsing on top of yours. You were gasping for air, stealing his since he refused to take his lips off of you for even a second. The cool material of his piercings contrasted with the warmth emitting from his body, making all hairs rise.

He couldn’t believe you were kissing him back. It’s so different when you’re awake.

The rattle of the front door was unbeknownst to you both, too endeavoured with tending to one another’s needs. Sheets rustle, hardly audible moans trapped inside of the locked bedroom door. Another world created, separated from regular life.

“Guess who! It’s been such a crazy day. I hope you didn’t miss me too much.” Hyugo calls out to both of you and is met with silence.

“Hellooo?”

“Sol? Did you go out without me?” He whines as he takes his shoes off and struts through the apartment. “You wouldn’t ditch me without telling.”

Noticing the locked door, Hyugo pokes his tongue to the side of his cheek as he fiddles with the lock. It didn’t take much for the weak door to open, revealing Sol lurking over your body. His hands under the sweater that covers you groping your flesh, his lips still joined to yours as the collective grunts are now freed.

“Oh, gross! What the hell?!” Hyugo’s eyes widen as he exclaims in shock, causing Sol to go still.

“Shit…” He murmurs, placing his forehead against yours with a disappointed glint in his gaze. “Hyugo.”

“You could’ve told me. I called out way more than three times!”

“You did?” Sol’s hands savour a final grip on your chest before agonizingly sliding out from under the fabric.

“Duh! I thought something might have happened to you two, but I was wrong. Clearly.”

“Sorry… We’ll make it up to you, I promise.” You glance over at Hyugo and he scoffs, covering his eyes with his hand.

“What? Are you both going to fund the therapist I’ll need after walking in on whatever that was?”

“Hyugo,” Sol snickers, rolling off of you and lying down by your side. “You can sit down.”

“Do I want to sit on that bed after what you’ve just been doing?” The plastic bag in Hyugo’s clutch rustles as he plops onto the mattress, keeping his distance from both figures present.

“Anyway. I got what you asked for, and I also got us all a gift.” Hyugo opens the bag and pulls out a fresh sketch pad for Sol, as well as a miniature pony plush, similar to his bigger one.

“This one is for you.” Hyugo passed you a teeny black kitten, its eyes almost bigger than its face. You make sure to thank him and he nods.

“I got myself a giraffe because it looked cute. Oh, yeah. I also got this. It’s like I have built-in sensors.”

Hyugo reveals the last item in the bag, a box of condoms, and slides them over Sol’s way. His face glows a bright shade of fuschia and his eyes darken, shooting daggers through Hyugo’s teasing being. Sol leans over you and shoves them into his bedside table drawer, simmering with embarrassment as he notices your flushed expression.

“Well? Are we gonna watch the movie or what? I’m sure it can’t be scarier than what I just saw.”

“Enough.” Sol reprimands him, pointing down to the remote which remains on the floor close to Hyugo.

“Oh, you were really into it, huh?”

“Hyugo!”

In response to Sol’s yell, his devious chuckle rings out. The DVD begins where it left off and the remote is returned to the centre of the mattress. You remained in Sol’s embrace, his arms securing you to his broad frame.

Time slips away, the end credits of the movie rolling out leaving Hyugo with more questions than he initially intended to depart with this evening. He places his bowl of popcorn down and speaks.

“I’m confused by the ending.” Hyugo huffs, reaching for the remote to switch to a new channel.

With a peek from the side of his eye, he found you and Sol passed out, fast asleep in each other’s arms. He pokes Sol’s cheek a few times—neither one of you has plans of becoming conscious anytime soon judging by his brief assessment.

It was sweet in a way. Hyugo’s heart warmed seeing Sol with you, he seemed so content. A pleasant change from his usual stoic expression—he’s at peace. Before escorting himself out, he was sure to drape the blanket over your bodies. Someone has to take care of the two of you. As long as Sol has you, Hyugo could rest peacefully knowing his vulnerable heart is in a safe place.

[prettycottonmouthlamia]

Before I end up making that post I want to talk about briefly with the release of IS5 again, the concept of each IS havin a fundamental theme of unreality to them. I really like this, because it feels like in a pretty unsubtle way a solid way to ground the structure of a roguelike setting into what is normally a pretty grounded storyline.

IS1, Ceobe's Fungimist (please Hypergryph let it return), is a hallucination caused be Ceobe eating weird forest mushrooms. Nothing that happens in IS1 is real, explicitly. However, IS1 is fundamentally drawing from something, and in Ceobe's case, it seems to be drawing from her memories of traveling abroad Terra looking for the origins of her axe (and food, of course). What are things Ceobe's remembers happening to her, what are hallucinations filing in the gaps, and what are Ceobe catching glimpses of fundamental truths of the world (the Black Procession and the Feranmut skeleton that is Maybe? Lifebone for instance) is left extremely vague. Characters such as the Frozen Monstrosity do seem to genuinely exist, but there was no Frozen Monstrosity in Lungmen. Was Ceobe using something she herself experienced in place of Frostnova, or is Ceobe hallucinating the entire thing regardless? Who knows. Ceobe probably doesn't have the answers for you.

IS2 has explicit themes of madness and deception, and although I do not find him a particularly compelling character or plot device, a playwright who can literally warp reality with his plays. Much of the stage design recycles echoes the stage design from IS1, almost as if the Troupe is welcoming you, the player, onto their stage. You aren't here to discern the truth behind the Troupe, you're here to save one man, and while you are able to peel back the curtains somewhat, you never really do learn what the Troupe is. There are puppets who come to life and whose music damages your souls, there are actors driven so fully into their roles that they end up traveling to Sami to carry out their destined end, there's a Troupe Leader whose defining imagery is puppets and strings, and yet, you're no closer to finding out how this all happened than you are trying to explain why the Knights' Duel node exists.

IS3 asks the question "What if time is like evolution?" and presents its unreality in the form of a sprawling, massive bundle of alternative timelines to your own. It feels almost impossible to line up most of the events and memory mappings and endings on top of each other, and even the endings seemingly branch off into several versions of themselves. While, for example, the Irene encounter maps onto her own memory mapping story, we never see the timeline involving Lumen's memory mapping in the game at all. There is no Seaborn version of Gladiia in-game for you to fight. This is made seemingly all the more uncanny by the fact that there is actually a canon timeline going on, and the implication through the Bosky event that you are only seeing these alternative timelines because curiosity got the better of you. You came into contact with technology alien and yet familiar, and as a result, your good little timeline where you just save a girl who tries to commit identity death turns into you having to watch from the third person a version of the world where you and Mizuki are potentially the only intelligent life left on Terra for all eternity.

(No seriously, this ending is fucked up, what the fuck.)

IS4, on the other hand, gives us a reality that is unraveling, so fragile and malleable that you can cause things to manifest out of sheer force of will, something there are explicit warnings about not doing. It's a land where the living become the shambling, almost mechanical dead, and the mechanical being living creatures. It's a world where the abyss looks back at you, and finds you to be worth destroying. Gravity isn't right, time isn't right, language isn't right, snow falls black and the dead rise once again to beckon you home. There's nightmares in the shadows, and they're eating away at everything.

Sorry shit I got dark there. IS5 is Nymph's happy little storytime where she explores future and alternative versions of Kazdel through the imagination of her and her compatriots. What if Theresis and Theresa worked together and Nasti completed her designs (and maybe committed a genocide????) and Kazdel was a flying utopia city? What if the Teekaz all walked in a different direction and became the Sankta, or all became the Anasa? You know, sometimes you lose your sense of reality and become dependent on the visions you see from the Revenants, sometimes you need a little bunny to pull you out, and sometimes those Revenants might have actually caused a new reality to exist but haha, don't worry about that.

What if, hahaha, just saying what if, there was a version of Amiya in a world where the Sarkaz barely exist, where she was given the crown by a dying Theresa with no guidance on how to use it ethically? Haha I mean, what if Kal'tsit wasn't around? What if, just theoretically, there was a version of Amiya for whom the most formative person in her life was the decaying mind of a man stuck as an AI program who kept his people alive for 10,000 years? What if, hehehehe you know, what if, there were special endings you got for each of the stories you told where you went onto fight her, showing up closing up those stories, those worlds, to eternally protect them until she can find the answer to all troubles? What if the Sarkaz prophecy from Chapter 7 kept coming up, over and over again, the prophecy of an Amiya who would melt millions of lives into memories over and over again? What if this was an Amiya so immediately dangerous that the Sankta version of Buldrokkas'tee doesn't hesitate in trying to kill her?

I mean that would be a really scary story if it was true. Really it's Nymph's special storytime with the revenants. Don't worry about it.

Anyways I love pretty much each of these takes (IS2 is definitely the weakest though) and it shows a lot of thought from the storywriters about how they wanted to integrate a roguelike mode into their game.