#“theyre just kids” BRO SO ARE THE ENTIRE REST OF THE SCHOOL AND THEYRE NOT MURDERING INNOCENTS WHILE TRYING TO SUMMON A CORRUPTED RAGE GOD Tumblr posts
perpetuallyboo · 6 months ago
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The posts ive seen about "I really hope the bad kids dont hurt the rat grinders :(" is giving the same energy as the hangman to fabian going "we should be nice to her cause if we just keep being nice to her then she'll stop being so mean!!"
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nicegaai · 3 days ago
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okay you found me (well the account that wanted to be found anyways 😭).
love the responses about the sibling dynamics (although i'm under the impression that the sámi people hate finland [for good reason]). somewhereville usa is so real [although if you're wondering, you got the vibe of most of the midwest down. much of the suburbs are very anywhereville].
i read your rereading þr post and one thing i want to add is that i hc that emil was wearing a hot topic logo t shirt (although apparently they don't sell those???). what's another small hc you have about the five?
kksdjlk SORRY!! the activity page on this acct is slow, i notice when i get new followers :P
the sapmi/sámi irl probably do, but historically speaking, theyre probably closest-ly related to the finnish out of the nordics...maybe. but she could just as well have been adopted. ummm of all the concerning implications þetta has that i should probably make a long disclaimer about , the sapmi oc thing is the last thing i was thinking ab but maybe ill tack that on whenever i put it together. im thinking last chapter... "im sorry to every nordic person and especially the icelanders in real life for implying you(r natl reps) do incest. i have a fetish and im doing a bit. please stop blocking me on ao3 i didnt even know u could do that"
thank you for the midwestie endorsement!!! it means a lot fr! :D im basing a lot off of TV and somewhat my own experience in the american suburbs. btw this lot live one town over from you so watch out next time u see a blond guy
i could make up headcanons for them all day long ... or i guess in this AU everything i say is canon actually. whoa . thats a lot of power
everyone has a nicotine addiction lowkey (except emil? so far) im talking vapes (timo) im talking zyns (mads) and normal ciggies too (sig) (ber is all of the above)
sig in high school was angry and confused and kind of a freak. i think he wore gir hoodies. he would have loved myspace era jeffery star and being an awful diva but he was doomed to something else entirely by association with the magic (the gathering) club
mads' peak golden retriever bf era was high school. he played sports, he was popular, he started a band with his friends... he just didnt have a plan afterwards and burnt out (temporarily?). SAD
ber was graduating hs ab the time sig and mads were starting. i think he was in band, brass section, socially awkward and a kissless virgin. he thinks back on hs and gets embarrassed about the way he was, but minus the virginity he hasnt changed one bit.
timo is an enigma to me. i have trouble pinning him down. i think he could have been one of those theater kid furries but hes also outgoing and generally likeable by the school population (showers regularly). just kind of a weirdo!
WAIT . THE REST OF THIS LIST IS GOIGN TO BE GOOD ONES
(not incl timo) their shared grandparents were first cousins, and it was less weird back then. :) no, they do not know this. when the day comes he finds out, mads will go into a downwards spiral of "we should have done this thing proper, me and sig could have been married"
timo's full time job is doing furry commissions on xitter and vrchat. im talking some real degen illustrations. he is soon going to start an autobiographical webcomic about furries doing incest (names changed to protect identity) and people online will call him a LARPer and the story unrealistic and it will piss him off so much
fun fact the rest of the town is minorly fleshed out, i used to talk more ab other things too... alfred and gilbert do crossfit with mathias and they do gay shit in the locker rooms and are about 1 flash of insight away from admitting they have a 3p fuckbuddy thing going on but nah nah theyre bros they hang out its fun its lighthearted its male bonding. working out together just does something for the libido you know how it is
gilbert is dating erzsebet (there was a whole sideplot with them and roderich but i forgor it) and alfred is a Sigma Male Who Is Too Cool To Date A Woman but he actually has a weird thing with matthew going on behind closed doors
most of the heta characters are out there in the town and a lot of them went to high school together. or something. england was one of the teachers... aughhhh its been so long since i was talking ab the au the details r murky fml
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whumpmatsus · 3 years ago
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I may have sth, but since its 18!karamatsu i love him way too much to hurt him all the way XD
But how about a classic bully situation? He IS timid so he is an easy target. Maybe the bully is from the theatre club as well (just to double the angst). His friend/crush realises the situation and after a while of trying they figure out that its kinda difficult having to face this bully just on their own if anything now theyre a target too! All they can rely on is the rest of the matsunos byr This happens during the time the brothers fell apart 👀✋
and it was on that day... the KARAMATSU DEFENSE SQUAD was born!!!
I did my best, my knowledge of the movie is a bit faded but I tried! at the very least, the situation hopefully fulfills everything you wanted
(I’m not afraid to hurt him lots, but definitely there’s tons of comfort here, the poor baby deserves someone to protect him~)
ENJOY!! I feel like I wrote this super fast and it’s not quite as good as some of my others but I was definitely vibing with it while writing 😂
I also totally feel the bros on this one, I’m the oldest kid in my family and even tho my relationship with my brother might not be perfect, that’s my baby brother and no matter what else is going on, as soon as someone else treats him bad I go into big sister protection mode!! 🔪🔪
... and I totally feel reader too because UGHHH I just wanna protect Kara!!!
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When you enter a new high school in your final year, it feels almost like you’re an outsider.
Most of these people have grown up together. They were in the same preschool, the same primary school, the same middle school, and now the same high school. All of them have been together for their entire lives. Especially in a small town like Akatsuka Ward, where everyone knows everyone else.
It’s hard to fit in when you only have one year to bond with the rest of the students. Toward the end of the year, it becomes apparent that you haven’t really gotten that close to anyone. You sometimes share little moments during lunch or in class with Takahashi Nozomi; she’s really the only person you consider a friend, even if you’re not quite ‘friends’ in the traditional sense.
With only a month left in the school year, you actually manage to find another friend in a guy named Karamatsu.
You’ve seen him hanging around with his brothers, or at least you know they’re his brothers. After being startled at seeing the same face everywhere (sometimes with a boyish grin, sometimes with patches of acne, sometimes with glasses, sometimes with half-lidded eyes, sometimes with a forced scowl, and sometimes with chubby red cheeks), Nozomi giggled as she told you about them all. They’re sextuplets, the Matsuno brothers, and they used to be almost carbon copies of each other in both looks and personality.
She says they’ve become different now as they try to find themselves, to become distinct adults. You wonder how anyone could have ever mistaken them for each other, though you suppose it’s possible if they really were completely identical up until now. To you it’s pretty easy to tell them apart once you know their names.
You’d certainly never mistake Karamatsu for one of his brothers. He’s a very nervous person… except that he seems able to put that aside for the sake of being kind. When you were sitting by the exit doors after classes were over, crying because you forgot your umbrella and couldn’t imagine walking all the way to the train station in the rain, he was the one who helped you.
Being so shy, he could have just hung back. Instead he came up and spoke to you in this soft voice. He led you outside and let you stand under his umbrella, walking the whole way to the station with you so you wouldn’t get wet.
Ever since then you’ve been hanging out with him more, sometimes just reading side by side in the library, sometimes talking to him and his younger brother Ichimatsu during lunch in the stairwell, sometimes walking to the train station together like on that day. It’s nice and comfortable. Neither of you push each other.
You think you’re friends now. You hope so.
Even still, you’ve come to start viewing him through another lens. He’s sweet and handsome and you… don’t know that you stood a chance of not developing a crush on him.
Though, you don’t know that you can tell him. Would it spook him? He’s so skittish and unsure, you don’t want to startle him or anything. So for now you just let yourself be content in what you have.
The biggest problem comes when you catch someone practically slamming Karamatsu into the lockers, and the conversation between the two of them implies that this has been going on for a long time. It boggles your mind, because ever since you became friends with him, you’ve walked with him to the auditorium before heading home. He’s in the drama club that meets every day after classes let out, so you think you might as well ‘drop him off’ since he always walks you to your locker before classes start.
If this has been going on for a while, how did you never know? Why wouldn’t he tell you? The day you see it, it’s because you lingered for a minute before heading out the door, on your phone; out of sight of Karamatsu and this other guy, but able to see them from your spot.
It makes you mad more than anything. The bully is a popular kid, who’s easily got like 10 centimeters on poor Karamatsu, and the comments you overheard make it clear he doesn’t want Karamatsu in the drama club. They’re along the lines of things like, “You don’t belong here, so why don’t you get lost already?” and “You know you’re never gonna be anything other than a fucking tree, right? You’re never gonna get a lead role, because you suck!” and “Why don’t you just go hang out with your loser brothers? They’re the only people who are ever gonna give a shit about you, and you know it!”
A few times now you’ve seen it and heard what he says, because after the first time, you start to watch for a minute after you walk Karamatsu to the auditorium. You want to make sure this guy wouldn’t actually get physical again ― seeing him shove Karamatsu into the lockers in a way that probably left bruises is a memory that’s never going to leave you. Just thinking about it makes you angry.
How dare anybody be mean to Karamatsu like that? He’s such a kind person, he never causes trouble or hurts anyone. He doesn’t deserve to be treated any other way than he treats everybody else.
So today you wait until drama club’s over. You watch Karamatsu head into the auditorium, thankfully without the bully meeting him at the door this time. Then you camp out there, playing on your phone and reading and killing time until the club meeting is over. Usually it lasts for an hour, so you keep an eye on the time.
Finally people start to trickle out of the auditorium, and two of the first out are Karamatsu and the bully. You get to your feet quickly… though not fast enough to keep the bully from pushing your friend into the lockers again. This time he actually grabs a fistful of Karamatsu’s hair, tugging at it, hard.
“You know, I really don’t get you,” he hisses, and slams Karamatsu against the lockers again. “I keep telling you over and over, you should go find somewhere else to act like a fucking nerd, but you keep coming back here. We’ve got like two weeks left till graduation, and you’re still in here trying to get attention? It’s just not gonna get through that you don’t deserve it. You’re never gonna have people looking at you and thinking you’re this cool actor who’s any good. So why are you still bothering?”
Karamatsu keeps his eyes down, clearly trying to avoid making the situation worse. You can only imagine what kind of fear is going on in his head, because he’s such a non-confrontational guy, you know he just wants to be left alone. Even if he wants some attention as an actor, what’s wrong with that? Why the hell doesn’t he deserve that? “C… come on… Morita-san… it’s not like I’m trying to t-take your spot or anything…”
“Yeah, and you never could! You’ve thought about that, haven’t you? Why I always  get the lead and while you’re always in a part that could be played by scenery? It’s ‘cause you suck, Matsuno. You and the rest of your creepy brothers, you’ll never amount to anything.” He yanks on Karamatsu’s hair again. “Oi, wake up! It’s time to stop pretending, dumbass!”
“HEY! Let go of him!” As soon as you recover from your shock and can move again, you rush forward. Your hands are immediately grabbing at Morita-san’s, trying to pry him off of either Karamatsu’s hair or his shirt. What the hell is this guy’s problem?! What does it hurt him if Karamatsu likes to act, especially if Karamatsu doesn’t care if he’s got a small role? “Come on! Pick on someone else, you asshole!!”
“(Name)!” Karamatsu’s eyes widen when he sees you, and he starts to struggle a little rather than stay still. “W-what are you doing here? Please don’t…”
Before he can even finish that sentence, Morita-san has given a forceful smack that knocks you onto the floor. Although you’re sure you wouldn’t have anything but a bruise on your butt from the landing, his hand also hit your jaw hard enough that you can already feel it swelling. “O… ow…”
Morita-san laughs as he pulls on Karamatsu’s hair again. “Wow, so you have someone who’s willing to bark at me like a dog trying to protect its master? Too bad they’re not a big dog. Then again, you don’t deserve someone who could actually stand a chance.”
He keeps Karamatsu pinned to the lockers with one hand, and puts the other in his pocket as he looks down at you. “(Name), is that it? (Surname), right? Maybe you don’t get it ‘cause you’ve only lived here for like a year, but this guy and his dumb brothers are losers. If you wanna waste your time with any of them, you’re even stupider than all of them combined. Maybe next time, I can dunk both your heads in the same toilet.”
With that, he suddenly turns and practically throws Karamatsu down on the floor like he’s pitching a baseball or something. Karamatsu lands just a little bit away from you, and you see his face hit the floor. He barely catches himself, but you notice that he winces when he does, and that it looks like there’s blood dripping down his cheek.
“You dorks are lucky I have to get going,” Morita-san sneers. “Don’t worry, though. I’m not done with either of you, if you ever show up here again.”
Almost instantly Karamatsu is crawling over to you as Morita-san heads off down the hallway, and you grab him to scuttle behind the wall so you don’t catch anyone else’s attention as the auditorium starts to empty out. As soon as you have him close, he clings to you so tight you think you can hear his heart beating.
“Y-you shouldn’t have done that,” he murmurs, and yet he doesn’t seem to want to let go. As much as you’re sure he didn’t want you to get hurt, he’s pressing himself into you for safety. “Why are you even…”
You look up to find that despite your soreness and beginning bruises, he seems to be in worse shape. There are tears starting to trickle down his face, and the blood running down his cheek is from the patch of acne on that side ― it appears when his face hit the tile, it hit hard enough to make it bleed. He’s also cradling his wrist against his chest in a way that tells you it hurts.
A couple tissues are fished out of your pocket, and you reach over to hold them against his cheek. Hopefully, if you can stop the bleeding, that might suffice to help things while you ride the train. “I saw him bullying you a couple times,” you answer quietly. “I wanted to see if… if maybe I could…” You sigh. “But now look, you’re hurt. I’m sorry… I just made everything worse.”
He shakes his head, grimacing at the pressure from the tissues. “Ow… n-no, don’t be sorry… you got hurt, too. That’s why I didn’t tell you about it… I knew y-you’d try to do something and… well…”
For a long few minutes, the two of you sit there together. One hand holds the tissues, and your other hand gently strokes his back to help him calm down. After all… it’s okay. He didn’t do anything wrong. He was trying to keep you from getting involved so you wouldn’t get hurt.
You don’t really know what to do now. Not only did you not fix anything, now Morita-san is going to come after you, too. He’s evidently stronger than both you and Karamatsu, so there’s no strength in numbers.
… Or, is there? Maybe you just need more numbers.
Hesitantly, you brush a kiss over the top of Karamatsu’s head. He stiffens in your arms, looking up at you with watery eyes and an expression of disbelief that you just did that. “… (Name)…?”
“C’mon, Karamatsu.” You offer a smile, then guide him up onto his feet, doing your best to support him. “Let me walk you home.”
-
“So, wait, wait… Kara… months?! This has been happening for months and you didn’t tell anyone?! What the shit, dude?!”
The tone in Osomatsu’s voice makes both of you cringe as you smooth a bandage coated with antibiotic ointment over Karamatsu’s cheek. He gives a whimper of discomfort, and leans against you readily afterwards.
“I… I didn’t know if you guys… would know what to do.” His voice is quiet and shaky, still a little rattled from today’s events. “Things have been so weird between us lately… I-I wasn’t sure if you’d even… care.”
“Of course we care!!” Choromatsu snaps, though he hurries to put himself back into place, probably realizing how harsh that sounded. “We’re your twin brothers! And even if you didn’t come to us, why not go to one of the teachers?”
Before he can come up with a reply, Totty scampers back into the room with an ice pack, patting it lightly against the swollen bruise on your jaw. “Here, here, (Name)-chan! Are you and Karamatsu-nii-chan gonna be okay??”
You ruffle his hair with one hand, then grab the ice pack to hold against your jaw yourself. “Uh-huh. Thanks, Totty. Did you get one for Karamatsu’s wrist?”
“― Oh! I’ll be right back!!” And he’s off again.
Since your injury isn’t that bad, you shift the ice pack from your jaw down to Karamatsu’s wrist. He jumps a little, but reaches over to hold it himself. “I’m sorry… y-you guys are all so worried… I didn’t want you to worry.”
“We should be worried,” you huff. “You shouldn’t have to deal with this. You’ve never done anything to anybody! You don’t deserve to get hurt just because some jerk wants to go on a power trip. We’re all adults, right? He should fucking act like it and pick on someone his own size.”
You hear Ichimatsu snort mirthlessly before putting a hand on his hip. “Who did you say it was? Morita-san? I’m friends with his sister. She can make things hell for him.”
“Good,” Jyushimatsu speaks up, shoving his hands in his pockets. “I’ll kill him, and then his sister can be hell.”
Karamatsu frowns at all of them and shakes his head. “N-no, you guys… you don’t have to…”
“You’re damn right we have to, stupid!” Osomatsu crosses his arms. “Nobody fucks with my baby brothers and gets away with it. I don’t care if shit’s weird between us, you’re still our brother! We’re not just gonna let someone mess with you like this!”
Choromatsu pushes his glasses up with an anxious smile. “Besides, bullying is against the rules! Morita-san needs to be punished.”
Totty rushes back into the room; upon seeing that you put your ice pack on Karamatsu’s wrist, he presses the new one against your jaw. “All set! Kara-nii-chan and (Name)-chan will be all better in no time!”
You smile, accommodating Karamatsu who’s trying to hide his face in your shoulder. “It’ll be okay, Karamatsu.”
“Y… you promise… none of you will g-get hurt because of me?” he mumbles, peeking up at you.
“No way,” you promise as you give him an affectionate squeeze. “Now that your brothers know, it’s gonna be seven of us against one.”
“That settles it,” Osomatsu grins. “This jackass, Morita-san?”
Everyone turns to look at the eldest Matsuno.
“… He’s going fuckin’ down.”
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grocerystoredean · 3 years ago
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Dude i love the internet sometimss i go to someones blog and theyre like “sideblog is at x” and im like !!!???! DUDE???? Sometimes i think i know three people but they turn out to all be the same person on different accounts and it makes me love them more. Theres someone, like longtime friend, on my discord server who im not entirely sure is actually a separate person or another account for the same person but like. Ive known these people for like 3 years now so i cant really ask??
I feel like ive said this before but worst thing in the world is not knowing if something you do or experience is normal -
My sisters dog is growling at nothing right now but she was kinda asleep and now shes up and wagging her tail so probably im not about to get nerfed by a ghost. If i dont send this ask you’ll know ig.
- anyway so then youre googling hospital robots at two in the morning and for some reason the internet doesn’t know what you mean by that. Idk the human experience is so varied and seriously what how are there so many ways to do things the world is so crazy. I wanna live in the same house with someone i share no language with and see how that would work out. I think im pretty good at nonverbal communication and also it would be rad af to halfway not know whats going on half the time but it would be in a fun way this time. My neighbor, when i was bad at chinese or having trouble learning or whatever offered to drop me off on the streets of beijing and pick me up three days later, he said by then id know the language. At the time that scared me, and i dont know how good of an idea that specifically is but idk id do it. Its just so wild how many things there are yknow??
Honestly i feel like i had other funnier things to say but i cant remember any of them so instead how about you tell me how youre doing? How was your new year and being back at school and whatnot? Seen any cool critters?
omg hi dba! answer for this and the rest of ur asks under the cut!!!
i think u can ask. i dont think its that rude. its a wide internet out there. im really careful abt keeping track of sideblogs and im super weird abt like who i follow i have neuroses abt it and stuff but so anyway i do keep exact track of who is who. if i interact via a sideblog i constantly keep track.
as for the varied and wild human experience yes so much. i dont think its a good idea to do that but my dad said when he lived in south america for a little while as a kid he picked up spanish really quick so it's true. i love thinking about the complex inner lives of everyone around me. andrew garfield voice i think you could fall in love with anyone if you knew their story.
my new year was very boring lol i literally watched doctor who on da couch but it was good. as for critters i was getting high a while back (sorry kids. dont do drugs etc) and a deer literally came out of the woods and walked right by me. like it was not 5 feet from me i could have reached out and touched it. it was sososo cool.
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okay so when u sent this i was actually blogging while on a discord call with tumblr user transfagshit / carriecoded and so we were a little incomprehensible on the dash. our blogs should be viewed together in tandem from that night in order to piece together any jokes
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analyzing supernatural actually has nothing to do with being smart and everything to do with bullshitting. all analysis is going hey you know what would be funny. if i said this. i have a post somewhere that keeps being tagged as like meta and or whatever and i genuinely have no idea what i was saying. i typed it frantically at 1am. so clearly its at least a little bit bullshitting. its not exhausting at all because were all doing it as a bit. writing supernatural posts fills the hole in my heart that having not taken an english class in 2.5 years left. its a hobby.
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fsdakjsfdlkjf thanks bro. it'll be okay. someone died recently. which hasnt been fun. but i'm okay. or i will be or whatever. life goes on etc. i'll be fine! nevertheless he blogged etc
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the only thing with the omega variant is it is the last greek letter, which means we would have to do the million other variants first. which would suck. but god if we got there we would NEED the laugh. we earned the laugh. for getting through that. also dont apologize i love receiving ur asks!!! bussin. i feel like that word had a real cultural moment 5 months ago and i havent seen it since thank u for reminding me. i hope youre also having a lovely time wherever you are
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sanchoyo · 3 years ago
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danny phantom, season 3, episodes 7-13 thoughts! cannot believe im finishing this series so fast. ...cannot believe it ended like that...uh. one of the weirdest finales to a show I think I've seen, it really stood out against the rest of the series, and not in a good way, in my opinion. I paused to yell in caps lock...several times, I think, out of anger... BUT. ANYWAY, HERE WE GO.
see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3
-the fentons putting the kids to Work in the lab, with NO SAFETY GEAR. AT ALL. THEY JUST GOT BACK FROM SCHOOL AND ARE TIRED!!! and when jack asked how danny his day was and danny tried to say it was bad jack cut him off :( for the 400th time, i am stealing these kids.
-maddie and jack IMMEDIATELY SELLING THEIR LAB AND WORK FOR A LOT OF MONEY. and danny cant get into the portal anymore, oh no!!! he could always just steal vlads I Guess.
-THEY ARE VLADS NEW NEIGHBOR. OH MY GOD. this is a sitcom format. a butler came with the new mansion. i would absolutely try a kiwi fudge milkshake, why is the butler disgusted.
-the..guys in white bought the lab to shoot a missile. into the ghost zone thru the portal. bro i hate these guys
-jazz straight up setting her new bedroom up in the library. i am very very jealous
-"RATED E, FOR ENTRAILS"
-I like how the 14 year olds very quickly realize if the giw destroy the ghost zone itll destroy OUR ZONE because its just. like. the other side of the quarter so to speak. and the giw, a fully funded government agency, didnt consider that...(or worse, are willing to risk that anyway...)
-a...graphic novel version of the constitution? what in the world have you been READING SAM
-'cool, I always wanted to be called a meddling kid!' scooby doo reference...
-can they keep the butler. I love him.
-ecto latte....I also want to try that. is ectoplasm edible...
-YESS I KNEW DANNY WOULD USE VLAD'S PORTAL. vindicated.
-DANNY WHY DIDNT YOU JUST ASK JOHNNY NICELY. STEALING HIS BIKE IS SO SO RUDE.
-youngblood is also into astronaut stuff, thats really cute. and him being like 'phantom, dude!! :D' ALL EXCITED. THATS ADORABLE.
-the slapstick comedy of the giw slipping and falling and running into shit in the lab. is funny, but also, because this lab has NOOO safety codes in practice. god its a wonder dannys the only one to have died here...
-JOHNNY, SKULKER AND YOUNGBLOOD HELPING DANNY!!! I keep saying it but the other ghosts helping him. is my fav thing in the world. and, it's a really good thing the missile in the real world was harmless...otherwise the fentons wouldn't have had a home/lab to come back to...
-WULF WANTED POSTER!!! we havent seen wulfy in so long :( very funny the box ghost is offended by how much these ghosts are wanted for. first off, what do ghosts even DO WITH MONEY. does the ghost zone have its own currency??? what are ghosts BUYING
-the box ghost is So Funny, im so glad hes still got his bubble wrap. u are VERY wanted in THIS house box ghost. you are SO scary king. dont give up on ur dreams
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-this needs to be a meme format. I made a transparent version, very very messily, for future use.
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-this is a Fellow and a Friend
-box ghost accidentally bringing lunch for everyone, and giving people at the mall free shoes. SHOES ARE SO EXPENSIVE, ID BE SO GRATEFUL. helpful king. i feel SO bad for him lmao, he's putting in SO much effort. he wants the evil aesthetic So bad but hes Just Too Silly. I understand your plight, box ghost....
-oh my god. pandoras BOX. 'THOSE OF US IN THE BOX TRADE' HOW MANY ARE IN THIS BOX TRADE. I WANT IN. pandora is a multi-armed ghost goddess and i love her.
-SKULKER WHY ARE YOU RUNNING FROM THE EVIL UNICORN?? YOURE A HUNTER!! JUST SHOOT IT!!!!!!! JUST HUNT IT!!!
-box ghost...where did you get the cowboy hat. I respect it, i just want to know
-JAZZ COMING IN WITH THE BAZOOKA TO FIGHT THE 10 HEADED DRAGON!!! YEAH!!!!!!!!!!! and the rest of the fentons I Guess
-ignoring the sam/danny moments. I simple do not see them.
-...why doesnt danny just fly over the maze. or do the whole 'real world people act as ghosts in the ghost zone' and turn back!!! I know its just to show off the ghost greek monster designs. but STILL.
-danny being like. um. hi pandora. i found your box. >< polite...PANDORA IS SO GIANT. GIANT GHOST WOMAN. SHES GOING TO BEAT BOX GHOSTS ASS. another ghost thats nice to danny to add to the list :) and HER FORCING BOX GHOST TO APOLOGIZE. and having sandwiches with danny after making box ghost clean up. I LOVE HER.
-DANNYS 'BEWARE' AT THE END JAKHDJFKN
-okay, when dash pulled out danny's seat and was calling him buddy, for half a second I was like 'this is a prank, hes gonna pull it back' BUT THEN FRIGHT KNIGHT MY BELOVED IS BACK. AND EVERYONE STARTS CHANTING FOR DANNY TO BEAT HIS ASS WITH GHOST POWERS AND DANNY DOES WAY TOO EASILY, and im like, yup, this is a dream LMAO
-danny is getting an A+ in science :) my smart son
-DANNY WAKING UP FROM THE DREAM RIGHT BEFORE KISSING SAM AND BEING LIKE 'that was a dream...no, a NIGHTMARE!' same. not to be a hater but, shouldve been val. maybe I am a hater
-...danny running and checking the 'tapes'...why is his whole house constantly being recorded. hes been in ghost form/fights plenty of times in his house. does he have to run and wipe the tapes after?? every single time?? god
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-letting this image speak for itself
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-this is SO cursed
-NOCTURN'S DESIGN FUCKS SO HARD. the Venice mask vibes. also his space pattern not moving while the rest of his animation does is big chowder vibes. but this guy is basically the sandman but Evil, huh. I love dream plots. also, nocturn's design feels very similar to clockwork, like, red eyes and a scar over the same eye, but also just the purple, and the Cosmic Vibes. I want to see them fight. anyway nocturn's va was also avatar roku AND alfred in several batman cartoons.
-the 'sleepwalkers' designs were super cute in shape (kinda remind me of oogie boogie! pillow-cased shaped, which is appropriate for the 'king of dreams's minions) until I looked closer at their eyes. why do they look sewn shut!! (they open their eyes a few times, so they aren't, but they look like it...)
-I like how this show has been pretty consistent (with a few exceptions) about a Ghost Being Huge (or getting larger) = Very Powerful
-2 months of summer camping??? wtf, do camping things usually take that long?? I've never been to a camping...thing like that. but isnt that basically their entire summer??
-'the entirety of nature is your bathroom!' and thats why I do no camping despite loving nature LMAO.
-sam, at least TRY TO BE NICE TO THE OTHER GIRLS YOU'RE GOING TO BE SHARING A CABIN WITH. also, the amount of times people in this show have their SHOES ON THE BED!!! IM DISGUSTED
-swamp creature Is A Ghost. Big Foot is a Ghost. starting to think in this universe, every single cryptid or legend is a Ghost Actually
-paulina crying not only because star is missing, but because SHE FORGOT HER SUNBLOCK AND SHE BURNS SO EASILY!!!! okay girlfriends
-ghost cops are the real monsters at the camp. i.......I mean. fair. no one missed you walker
-WULF!!!!!!!!!!! WULF IS BACK!!!!!!!! MY FRIEND WULF :D MI AMAS VIN!!!!! kaj danny lernis Esperanto :)
-'relax kid, we arent here to do any harm' *immediately shoots danny* yeah. ghost cops. and also danny bringing walker 'wulf' and walker IMMEDIATELY SUCKING DANNY IN A THERMOS. FUCK OFF
-haha walker Bald. and haha walker Frozen Now
-the fenton thermos can...reverse its polarity to close portals? okay
-LIBERA MIA AMIKO. :")
-ohhh they end the ep with them star gazing, thats pretty cute...
-dani is back! ...with a new voice actress? wiki says AnnaSophia was in 3 diff movies in 2007 when this aired, so she was probably too busy... (including, bridge to terabithia aka the movie that ripped my heart out that I mentioned in the first ep Dani was in...kinda wanna rewatch it now)
-shes still scared of vlad, who's still being creepy and spying on her. 'shes hardly going to come home to daddy!' I WONDER WHY. also does vlad's cat look more evil than last time? love the concept of him going shopping for cats and being like 'give me your most EVILEST looking cat, please, so I can pet it in my spinny chair dramatically!' ...oh god white cat hair on his black suit. I have a black cat and her hair is still way too noticeable..
-vlad has a big 'valerie' button in his office. can he be pressing that button every episode, thanks
-'theres a GIRL called dani phantom?' yeah valerie. no relation, obviously, even with her looking EXACTLY like danny. so sad valerie just wants to help her dad and her get out of the place theyre in now and vlad using her. ill MAUL HIM
-dani having to STEAL FOOD. :( and valerie immediately being like oh poor kid :(( and trying to help her!!! and then dani immediately helping valerie!! this episode is starting SO well
-...and then valerie catching her. DAMN IT. and being surprised dani knew danny?? HELLO VALERIE I KNOW YOURE SMARTER THAN THIS. I AM SO SORRY THEY WROTE YOU THIS WAY. I STILL LOVE AND BELIEVE IN U !!!
-valerie lying her ASS off for a chance at gettin danny. ok <3 also 'they couldnt catch a ghost if it was living under their own roof' JSDHKJHNK
-danny. why dont you just tell valerie!! this would be so much easier if he was direct. there is NO way valerie would hurt danny (fenton) she'd be HORRIFIED. esp since she got on board helping dani!!
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*is held* :)
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-look at valerie and danny. flying together. about to go beat vlads ass together <333
-DANI SCREAMING AS VLAD IS MELTING HER. WHAT THE FUCCCK
-...fucking vlad convincing valerie hes a good dude with his stupid duplication. FUCK. DANNY JUST TELL H E R
-jesus christ how many times has danny had to watch loved ones die. even if she didnt stay perma-dead. glad they fixed her...
-valerie and dani pranking danny when he came out, oh :( cute...them havin fun and laughing together...babies
-BUT THEYRE JUST LETTING DANI LEAVE, AGAIN??? SHE WAS PREVIOUSLY STEALING FOOD. CHRIST GIVE HER A PLACE TO LIVE. OR A FAMILY. actually, I think it'd be really cute if, since danny isnt ready to out himself, dani went and lived with valerie?? dunno if her dad would have the money but,, it'd be a cute concept. big sis valerie...
-'tomorrow, it's game on!' 'and ill be ready to play!' THE FLIRTING....DANNY/VALERIE REAL
-oh my god,, valerie found out about vlad in the end. But he doesn’t know she knows!!! the DRAMA!!! HOLY SHIT THAT ENDING.
-this episode was. SO Much and probably one of my favorites out of s3. (I mean, there has been a gross lack of valerie this whole season, so thats not a hard choice to make...)
-FINALE EPISODE TIME.
-the title screen looks different! so no title card...
-vlad has his own fucked up satellite that looks like him?? okay. why does the animation look so different?? are they mixing cg in?? for what. anyway, vlad and the gang in SPACE. danny is 100% living his astronaut dreams rn
-'defeating frostbite' YOU BETTER NOT HAVE. YOU STOLE HIS COOL MAP. FUCK YOU VLAD
-wait oh my god. vlad is the final series boss, isn't he. I half expected a fake out, for another boss to show up midway, and for him to finally have to have a real truce with danny for this ep. ITS THE FINALE. VLAD FEELS SO UNDERWHELMING.
-And it's like-- his character isn't bad, i just feel like..he has more potential! they WANT him to seem like some smart super evil genius, but the way he's written makes that SO hard to believe...but the solid backstory and design is THERE and its FRUSTRATING.
-...DANNY CALLING VLAD OUT SAYING HE NEEDS THERAPY LMAOO THATS WHAT IVE BEEN SAYING.
-my grandpa technus is in the finale too :) 'well look on the bright side, at least im not downloading them illegally!' he says while stealing dvds. feels like hes calling me out. im watching this series on a bootleg website lmao. anyway, him turning the tech into a transformer. love that
-mASters BLASters sTOp diSAsterS shut the fuck up. you will never be valerie or danny. bite chomp kill. violence
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-like this if u crie everytiem
-my god the 3d/cgi mixed in looks SO BAD IT DIDNT AGE WELL AT ALL
-the white stripe in dannys hair kinda rules tho. did he just KILL HIS GHOST HALF??? 'revert his human half back to normal' UM. you ever unkill yourself. why are his friends/jazz so mad about it, he'll be in a lot less danger!! christ. they can still hunt ghosts!! as humans!! if they want to!! hes 14 if he wanted to be normal. let him. vlads stupid little team has things COVERED apparently. why are they acting like this. jazz would never act like this. is this fake whats going ON
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-oh my god jack was in a college band. vlad was also in the band. what did instruments they play. i didnt need that headline to tell me they sucked, but i want to KNOW MORE REGARDLESS
-valerie was here for 0.3 seconds.
-sam calling danny selfish. the audacity. no one is stopping YOU from hunting ghosts, girl. valerie does it!!
-I'm halfway through the episode and incredibly underwhelmed so far.
-why would they send jack and 3 teens to space to destroy the asteroid. why not professional astronauts. not even the 3 teens that have already been to space this episode...
-jack getting beat up by teenagers. ON TV. IN SPACE. I GUESS. I GUESS EVERYONE AGREED TO SEND JACK BECAUSE..VLAD SAID SO? we know it was to embarrass jack, but why would everyone agree. why didnt any other space program Do More or whatever, they sent like, 3 rockets/missiles tops?? no way
-danny attempting to punch vlad in the face. i WISH HE WOULDVE LANDED THAT HIT.
-vlad outed himself on live tv, on purpose? and BLASTED AT THE TEENAGERS HE HIRED. LMAO. HES HOLDING THE WORLD HOSTAGE, MAKING THEM PAY HIM BILLIONS TO STOP THE STUPID ASTROID. THATS YOUR GRAND PLAN??? REALLY. REALLY. im like. lmfao
-jack just now, on the last episode GETTING TOLD HE MADE VLAD A GHOST. THIS SHOULDVE HAPPENED WAY SOONER. jack's reaction was one of the only times in this entire show hes seemed human. 'an old friend? no. you? yes.' GET HIS ASSSS ACTUALLY. HE STRAIGHT UP LEFT VLAD IN SPACE. GOD DAMN. that is a Murder! I mean, I guess vlad could fly back to earth, but...I mean, he'll have to, right? no food in space. (that we KNOW of...)
-'thE WHolE EArtH, INTangiBLe?!' oh my god.
-...the white strand of hair somehow still had ghost dna, I guess, and getting blasted turned him back into phantom. I GUESS. I GUESS.
-the fentons being the first to clap for danny despite not knowing hes phantom...that was sweet. and very sudden character development, not at all gradual over the course of time or episodes like it probably should have been...
-sam and danny kissing. IT SHOULDVE BEEN VALERIE, BUT OKAY, I GUESS. also, its a little underwhelming, considering theyve kissed already...
-ALL of the ghosts being ready to beat danny's ass? really. no they wouldn't, they've worked together before, and some of those ghosts are friendly!! cringe. why is the last ep written like this. I mean they came thru at the last minute but. was really cringing for a minute there, why did they write it like that
-valerie is there for another 0.3 seconds! ....she should've been more involved. dani is also there! for also like 0.3 seconds. almost fast enough to miss. (btw, I think shes still homeless at this point, are, we going to...do ANYTHING ABOUT THAT IN THE LAST 5 MINS OF THE SHOW)
-the cgi smoke or whatever it is. this whole post is me saying the cgi is bad, but IT IS.
-'danny or should we say. DAAANNNNY.' this is like the 3rd or 4th time hes been outed damn, but to the whole world, again. and valerie saw, and is just. an extra in the bg clapping. bro im so mad.
-TUCKER IS THE NEW MAYOR? WHAT THE FUCK?? HES 14.
-i think. this is still linked to the dream ep a few times ago. hes still dreaming. this is a plot a 14 year old would write. this feels like a bad fanfic. so much got rushed, and not tied up. vlad wasnt really even the villain this episode, a fucking. non-being asteroid was.
-they kiss again. ok. sure. whatever at this point.
-VLAD IS NOW A FREE-ROAMING SPACE NOMAD. I GUESS. THATS. SURE. WHATEVER. THE END, I GUESS. cannot believe I'm saying this, but: they did vlad dirty.
-IF YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE HIM A VILLAIN, MAKE HIM A VILLAIN!!! DON'T MAKE IT A METEOR!!! STOP BEING WISHY WASHY WHO WANTS TO SEE DANNY VS ASTEROID!!! I didnt even WANT vlad to be the final villain because his character is SO back and forth (esp this season.) but he has done some FUCKED UP SHIT AND I WANTED THE WRITERS TO DOUBLE DOWN, PERSONALLY, IF THEY HAD TO MAKE HIM THE FINAL BOSS. the cabin ep where he basically held danny and maddie hostage? FUCKED. THE DANI THING? FUCKED. FUCKING COMMIT AND MAKE HIM ACTUALLY SCARY OR HAVE HIM FUCK OFF AND AGREE TO A TRUCE!! WHAT IS THIS DYING IN SPACE NONSENSE. (and, he will (fully) die out there, right? still half human, still needs food and water. I imagine he'll like, slowly half-die but this time his human side is dying. will he come back 100% ghost? we dONT KNOW. WE DONT GET TO SEE, ITS PLAYED LIKE SOME FUNNY THING AT THE END, THEN THATS IT!!! WHAT!!!)
-I don't know how to articulate how FRUSTRATING THAT IS. having him basically out himself and ''hold the world hostage'' does not track at all in my brain. like. he's always been scary because he is HUMAN, TOO. like, if he was 100% ghost, he'd be LESS scary, but vlad MASTERS has more power and influence than vlad PLASMIUS because of his position as mayor, his money, too, and his (supposed, s3 made me doubt it) intelligence/manipulation skills, and his being in good graces with jack made it HARD FOR DANNY. him outing himself for,, money and to 'control the world' i guess?? MONEY WAS NEVER HIS LIKE, MAIN GOAL. yeah obv he likes money and is materialistic and values his Rich Life, but hes got billions, the end goal? 1. getting maddie (and or danny as his son, but to me he always treated that as secondary) 2. ruining jack. this feels like they wanted to say 'oh he just wants POWER' which is. HMM?? OKAY?? obv he /does/ want power (usually over certain ppl, tho), but seeing him try to get it like this FELT WEIRD SOMEHOW. weird like the ep where he tried and failed to take over various historical civilizations, because like,, how is that realistically going to do anything for him?? just, being in that time forever and never seeing maddie aka Goal #1 again?? HELLO??? this was like that, but worse
-this was such a weird ending to an entire show. why did season 3 only have 13 episodes?? why did it feel so weirdly paced?? WHY WAS THE ENDING LIKE THAT. I think. I am going to pretend I did not see that. fucked up, dudes. I'm like...hm. I shouldn't have watched that because now I'm mad. valerie sweetie im SO sorry you shouldve been more present. it felt like..if they knew this season was going to be short, and the last season, they should've spent more time wrapping up EVERYONE'S plot lines for the entire season. imagine how cool it wouldve been if every single ep of season 3 was working towards something, a big, nice wrap up at the end, with nothing feeling TOO rushed because they'd been heading towards the End for the whole season....
I will probably end up writing a follow up full series thoughts post. In a couple of days so I can sit with my thoughts. BUT. overall, I really liked the show! (ignoring the finale and some of the moments that aged pretty poorly...) it was charming and a fun concept and very fun to watch in general :) and I am pretending the finale didnt happen <3 and I’m gonna dive RIGHT into the dp tags and mix fanart and posts in my queue, very excited to run and look at that 🏃🏻 (and, of course, make more fanart myself hehe >:3)
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curlytemple · 4 years ago
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alrighty @scottspack here i am to show my ass 
top 10 ships tag! these aren’t “in order” but #1 is #1 
1. cory and topanga! (boy meets world) my very first thought when given this prompt, theyre the blueprint! they are just BABIEs when they meet and they already Know each other. i will not pretend that topanga didnt shape me into the kind of girl who wouldnt change one thing about herself for a boy, keep your legs hairy and your convictions strong! the way they grow together is enough to make me hate god for not giving ME a cory matthews. high school ski trip infidelity aside, theyre the first couple that made me think i could find a man. i was wrong but its nice to think about. 
2. kim possible and ron stoppable... the way the entire series is about kim being a wildly competent type A cheerleader AND teenage vigilante super spy and ron is her chilled out lame best friend who is Always there to help her save the day... please take a moment to listen to the jesse mccartney song why don’t you kiss her? that plays during the romantic climax of the kim possible movie, perfectly capturing the intense fear that comes with thinking about maybe finally kissing your best friend from preschool at your junior prom. 
3. tami and coach eric taylor (friday night lights) ...come on, y’all!!!! genuinely the most real relationship i have ever seen on screen. i don’t even know what to say other than that they are REAL. coach and tami are such a good couple that it doesn’t make any sense to me that their kid would have such a massive stick up her ass. i even tried an ‘empathize with julie’ rewatch, and while a lot of her teen angst is understandable and even relatable, she still seems so disconnected from her parents/dillon at the end of the show in a very unsatisfying way! coach and tami are the heart of fnl. and tim riggins.
4. belly conklin and conrad fisher (the summer i turned pretty trilogy by jenny han) bro.... when your mother’s dying wish is for you to care for your little brother, so when he has a little crush on the girl you are In Love With you bury your feelings and go to college far away because nothing is more important than their happiness, and they could be happy together! and years go by and theyre going to get married and youre set on being Happy For Them until you find out how much your brother has actually done to break her heart and her trust and then the thought of her settling for him is even more devastating than your true desire for her to settle for you.... WHEW! when you’ve been busy coming of age and trying to make it work with your best friend that isnt really right for you and then you find out his brother who you’ve been in love with your whole life turned into a distant asshole because the most important person in yalls lives taught him to be selfless and he over-corrected in his grief... BOY!! this one makes me feel like my heart is in my stomach.
5. SENSE8! can i just say all of it? everything and everyone? if you are bisexual and havent watched sense8 yet, this one is for us, baby! the ship is an interconnected web of LOVE AND TRUST. the pairings are endless. if i HAD to choose my fav, wolfgang and kala (and rajan <3) and i cant explain why i would pick them over anyone else, thats just what my pussy told me. but frankly i shouldnt have to choose, THEY ALL SHARE ONE CONSCIOUSNESS! ONE LOVE! 
6. david and patrick (schitt’s creek) you know the way we all feel like we aren’t enough and we’re Way Too Much.. dan levy really said hey guys? no offense but i think we might be capable of loving and even maybe Being Loved. the way patrick is all in on david rose from the moment he meets him, before he can even consider what that means about himself... the way they push each other out of their comfort zones and only get more comfortable with themselves and each other..  the way david’s abstract monochrome wardrobe fills with HEARTS AND RAINBOWS !!!!!! again, where’s my man? ANYWAYS, 
7. todd and rory (straight up) anna said this post is for romantic ships only and so I CAN AND WILL INCLUDE THEM. i don’t want to give any spoilers because i dont think tumblr has seen this yet, but when i say this is THE romcom of the year, perhaps of my life, trust!! todd is a gay man with a sex aversion who decides to try to date women and rory is the brilliant woman he actually falls in love with. sometimes soulmates dont fuck!!! maybe there are no rules to a good relationship besides mutual respect, understanding, and the undeniable desire to Be Together. i rest my case! 
8. drew barrymore and adam sandler  is this valid? again i dont know or care. i grew up on adam sandler movies and drew barrymore makes him better every time. they’ve only done 3 movies together, one of which i have not and will not see (2014 is just too cursed to return to) but even tho these two have never been a couple in real life their chemistry is so palpable that they consider each other the person they will grow old with on screen. if that’s not hollywood romance, i dont know what is! sorry to timothy olyphant but even drew says adam is The One. 
9. stef and lena adams-foster (the fosters) MOM AND MOMMA! listen, abc family shows are insane, but stef and lena make the drama worthwhile. their house full of teens is not perfect or easy, but never have i ever seen lesbian moms at the center of any media, let alone ones who thrive like they do when they communicate, support each other, and lead with love. this is a couple who chooses each other and their babies over and over again. its about putting in the work, having the tough conversations, and making the hard decisions because you care!!!!! 
10.  I DONT KNOW HOW TO END THIS, I LOVE LOVE! michael and alex! marshall and lily! steve and nancy AND jonathan! lizzie mcguire and gordo! rachel and griffin mcelroy! nick and jess! schmidt and cece! fleabag and the priest! amy pond and rory! river song and the doctor! ROSE and the doctor! MY MOM AND DAD!!!! mickey and ian! han and leia! johnny and gheorghe! princess bubblegum and marceline the vampire queen! jackie and kelso! jackie and HYDE! donna and eric! kitty and red! richie and eddie! jake and amy! brittany and santana! tim and tyra! JACK AND ENNIS! dj and steve! uncle jesse and aunt becky! aziraphale and crowley! bob and linda belcher! LARRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
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swatato · 5 years ago
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fat. FAT. P H A T RANT INCOMING FOR ANYONE WHO CARES TO READ THIS NONSENSE CUZ @haldidoodh ASKED
That episode literally blasted the last of my serotonin into smithereens but TBH??? WHO AM I MAD AT I should have seen this coming this whole volume has been such a headache. I cant be bothered to type up a coherent rwde essay on everything that bothered me this episode so im just gonna copy and paste my earlier yelling here instead ;A;
Team Rwby was god awful in episodes 11-12. They’re so self-righteous, entitled, hypocritical and cocky as a team and it doesnt help that they all suck as individual characters nowadays (except for weiss but even she lost best-girl points this episode also lmao blake and yang aren’t even INDIVIDUALS anymore they’re just bumbleby). It was annoying at first but now its just infuriating how rwby thinks theyre always right with their uwu energy and think they can do whatever tf they want with ZERO CONSEQUENCES.
Basically any time there is a problem in this show they have Ruby uwu at it and its solved lol.
They kept giving ironwood shit for taking on this incredible burden SO THAT NOBODY ELSE WOULD HAVE TO and rather than offer any real solution they just kept going “but mantle” like okay?? But remnant??? Like obvi letting mantle rot is bad but HE WAS OPEN TO ANY HELPFUL SUGGESTIONS CUZ HES OBVI AT HIS WITTS END AND DOESNT LIKE THE IDEA EITHER but yeah they just proceed to be the fattest hypocrites by hiding secrets of their own after being all “no more secrets uwu” and WHEN THEY GOT EXPOSED THEY JUST WENT “>:[“ (yangs self-righteous little glare here pissed me off so much oof) especially when ironwood was laying everything out in the open to them from the start. AND ESPECIALLY WHEN THE SECRET WAS FKIN “OH YEAH SALEM CANT DIE LOL” They watched ironwood make every decision he did in hopes of beating Salem while KNOWING she couldnt die??? So literallY WHERE do they get off on screeching at him with their yOu doNt hAvE to Suffer In ManTle YOu doNt kNow whAt iTs liKe bs. Wtf made ruby distrust iw at the start anyway? Because he had a bunch of ships out? They kept this CRUCIAL piece of information from him because he seemed stressed out?? Like what made ruby keep the secret from him. Someone tell me.
And the fact that rwby beat the ace-ops makes no goddamned sense. The power-scaling in this show is non-existant. We finally got to meet some pro huntsmen in this universe who aren’t teachers but are actually on the job, but because we gotta move out of the way for that 👌🏽✨ Power Of Friendship✨ and ✨rwby is always right��� they somehow managed to beat experienced huntsmen with YEARS in the field who’ve actually graduated school??? FARM BOI OSCAR WHOS *JUST* LEARNING HOW TO FIGHT MANAGED TO LAND A PUNCH ON NEO FKIN POLITAN??? Didnt neo dance circles around yang??? Yang, who punches for a living and also beat mercury and adam??? I cant yall (and the fact that he didnt even bother to sneak up on her this boi literally screamed “no!!” as he ran down a hallway and neo didnt even have time to blink??? Pls)
Ruby’s “you were the best, until you trained us :3” -for maybe 2 days before my team went dancing ruby sis shut right tf up pls my god is this line just so. UNEARNED. Training in a room for a short while does not simply grant you the years of field experience the ace ops have and whAT IS UP WITH HER TRYING TO REASON WITH HARIETT AFTER SAYING THAT COCKY LINE AND FIGHTING HER??? WHAT and also like. The entire idea of “the ops lost cuz they weren’t good friends and were bad at teamwork uwu” is just so dumb. Ur telling me this group of high ranking hunstmen who’ve most likely been working together for at least a few years didnt have teamwork down??? Learning to work together is the most BASIC concept for a team to learn!! Its like the first thing a team has to perfect!! If the ace ops are supposed to be the best of atlas you dont think the ops would have gotten something as fundemental as teamwork down?? I dont buy it. And who gives a shit if they dont hang out after work or take selfies with eachother. Being friends doesnt necessarily mean theyre great at working together. If they succeed at relying on eachother to watch their backs, to keep each other alive (in the words of hariett herself) then Id think theyd know how to protect eachother i.e WORK TOGETHER.
And for all the ✨friendship✨ and ✨going through so much with someone✨ talk rwby like to do, the show barely displays these people acting like friends. We’re constantly TOLD how great of friends this group is, but the actual CONTENT we are shown leaves a lot to be desired. Tell me the last time ruby and blake teamed up in a fight. Or weiss and blake. Or yang and weiss. What teamwork?? Yang only interacts with blake now and weiss is only ever allowed to interact with ruby. Has blake ever said nora or ren’s name out loud? Have jaune and yang ever held a conversation between just them? Team rwby just spent a GOOD DEAL of time seperated from eachother, but when they reunite their teamwork is still somehow better than the ace ops?? Honestly its easier to believe that ruby is closer with team jnpr than she is her own team. If they showed the ops messing up during rwby vs ace ops fight due to lack of communication, then it still doesnt matter. My point is that they shouldnt have lacked teamwork in the first place.
Robyn was m e h this episode “JaMes ConTinUes to UnDeresTimAte Me” *proceeds to get knocked over in .3 seconds and is then KO for the rest of the episode* also great job for starting a fight and aiming to take clovers life in a moving airship with a terrorist on board when clover was acting PEACEFULLY and qrow was WILLING TO TALK IT OUT WITH IW and potentially work on a solution, but naw robyn is big mad and shall shoot.
Qrow made zero sense this episode too. I was with him right up until he chose TYRIAN OVER CLOVER??? THE PSYCOPATH WHO CANNOT BE REASONED WITH OVER THE RATIONAL DUDE YOU KNOW IS GOOD except clover wasnt acting rational in this fight at all and ill get to that AND IS THE ONLY FRIEND YOU HAVE WHOS NOT 19????? Qrow rly looked at tyrian- a man who is literally an enemy to all of remnant and went after ur neice- and said lets get rid of this punk together u and me bro. Like screw teaming with clover to bring down the dude you ACTUALLY have a grudge with whos also a serial killer and then trying to talk it out with clover whod be willing to do things peacefully why is this show like this
and AS FOR CLOVER. where were the braincells this episode. Qrow was trying to fight tyrian-the WAY bigger threat here, but clover??? kept knocking him away from tyrian and restraining him with his hook like??? YEAH LETS HELP OUT THE DEMON SCORPION CRACKHEAD HES CLEARLY NOT THE PRIORITY ATM nvm clover deserved to die there m8
His death scene was emotional and I feel bad for Qrow but u literally sealed his death when u ganged on him with tyrian so why are you even surprised. And on the subject of fairgame, im glad it didnt happen. Qrow was in no state for romance and I was glad he finally had a friend. He just spent the last volume thinking he wasted his life away helping oz, drowning in misery, drinking til he passed out on the street and so drunk he couldnt even be of any help during the apathy situation, when up til now hes been shown to fight just fine while drunk. I don’t see this as a “bury your gays trope” because clover was never confirmed to be gay and all their scenes added up to 40 seconds of platonic friendship. These two are grown ass men, if they had the hots for eachother then im pretty sure they could openly show it and not dance around it like theyre kids. I do feel bad for mlm viewers who were hoping for some rep with fairgame/lucky charms (cuz rt only cares if ur a cute marketable lesbian) but idc for the overly entitled fans who try to force their own headcanons on the writers and go feral when they dont get what they want. You dont just get to prance around claiming whats canon and what isnt. If rep is there then great, but if it isnt, then why not look somehwere else and let the author tell the story theyre trying to tell? Shipping fairgame cuz you think its cute is absolutely fine but not when u start getting ready to casterate crwby for not catering to you. Also, rwby sucks with lgbt+ rep anyway so what were yall expecting.
The only thing that was great this episode was the chorerography. It just sucks that the animation/choreo continues to improve while the writing doesnt. Another thing that really fell off this episode was the whole “we’re friends but we have to fight” drama. It doesnt work when its only ONE SIDE SHOWING ANY DISTRESS OVER IT. Only the ace ops (marrow, clover, the vine dude) seemed to show distress over having to fight rwby (it sucks that the only 1v1 weiss has won was because marrow was going EASY on her cuz he didnt wanna fight her fr) but rwby???? They didnt give any shits. They were so quick to turn against them and aim for their heads. They were SMILING as they ran at the ace ops, while they looked conflicted. If you oppose their UwU philosophy, you’re dead to them.
I really wanna enjoy RWBY but sometimes this show (and the fndm) really tests me. Its ironic how this episode came right after last episode, which I thought was the best chapter this volume. Anyway I rate this 10/10 cuz it gave me best character ironwood and best boi marrow and I would like to give them hugs for carrying this volume on their backs. (Also tyrian and penny and winter have been great too)
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louisfrecklesss · 6 years ago
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LCH [5] | Louisentine
Description: Clementine gets confused with her feelings while she’s spending so much time with Louis, especially after babysitting baby AJ together.
Words: 1,757 
Ship: Clementine x Louis
Warnings: make out session
Genre: Fluff, High School AU
A/N: it’s so fucking cold here in London, yes I live in London for those who don’t know. everyone seems to like this fic better than the other one? at least you like one of them because I don’t like my writing at all aH. anyway, I love you all. thank you for reading!
CHAPTERS
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6]
__
It’s been a or two week since Clementine has agreed to this deal with Louis, and not for one second has she thought it was a stupid idea. She could see from hanging out with his friends that they do pick on him a lot, Mitch the most; they’re not bullying him but he is the joke of the group only because he is the lesser of them. Clementine knew that if she was in his shoes she wouldn’t know if she would be as strong as he is.
So, here they all are in the common room of the school. Mitch, Aasim and Marlon sat opposite the couple who were seated on one of the large body bean bags. Clementine sat crossed legged in between Louis legs as he rest his chin on top of her head, her hands held his fiddling with his fingers while she scrolls through her phone with the other. 
“When are your friends getting her, babe?” Louis brushes his thumb over Clementine’s hand to get her attention, the girl switches tabs on her phone to their conversation reading the answer for Louis.
“I think they’ll be here in five, I’m not sure to be honest with you.” She looks up at him meeting eyes with him to which he winks at her causing her to look down smiling. Every time he winks, event though he has done it so many times, it still seems to make Clementine blush like crazy.
Clementine meets eyes with Marlon who is vaping the whole entire room up. “Brody?” His eye brows frown at the question before looking towards the door of the room; just in time, Brody walks into the room with Clementine’s friends. Louis knows them but they haven’t all chilled together as ‘friends’. 
“Baby!” Brody practically screams as she sees Marlon in the far corner, he opens his legs up on his seat inviting her to sit on his lap. It wasn’t too long before they were all over each other.
Aasim turns away from the couple. “Looks like it came straight out of a porno.” Violet, who came in with the rest of Clementine’s friends, high fives Aasim before taking a seat next to him. 
“Oh right, guys, these are my friends. Violet, Sophie an-”
“Ruby!” Clementine is a little shocked when the rest of the boys know who Ruby is. “Darling.”
Ruby giggles when Mitch and Marlon continue to shout her name. “Don’t y’all darlin’ me.” 
“You know each other?” Louis questions.
“We always pretend to be sick so we can pay our little Ruby a visit, right Aasim?” Marlon hits Aasim with his elbow a couple times before he is rewarded with a punch on his arm. “Or is it to see that asian guy that is always sick but never fuckign speaks?”
“James?” Ruby questions sitting on the other side of Aasim who physically tenses in his seat, Louis tap Clementine lightly pointing at Aasim before smiling down at her. Clementine saw what he was talking about and mouthed the ways how cute before engaging back in the conversation. 
“James is pretty fucking hot.” Clementine states nodding her head along with her fake boyfriend. 
“Oh yeah, James has my heart.” Louis clenches his chest and Clementine lifts her hand to high five him behind her. The group just break into a fit of laughs including Aasim himself. It was only recently that Aasim came out about his sexuality so it was hard for him to joke about it still.
“Too bad his gay Clementine.” Mitch adds pointing at the girl who frowns slightly earning a hurt expression from the boy behind her. She tilts her head back looking at him who pecks her lips quickly earning a surprised expression from her, nevertheless, she grins.
Sophie is almost glued to Violet’s side not knowing these people enough to really fit in; Clementine notices this telling her to come sit opposite her which happened to be right next to Mitch. Mitch offers her a small smile to which she returns before saying something to him which Clementine can’t hear, she’s just glad that she has someone to talk too. 
“So, party tonight? My house, everyone has to be there because I said so.” Marlon says standing shortly after, he goes round getting everyone number and adding it to a group chat, not too long after everyone receives his address.
Louis admires his girlfriend as he sees her shaking her head softly. “I don’t do parties.”
“Clementine does not do parties.” Violet says to clarify the point that Clementine just made. Louis did not seem too happy about this, he stood up making Clementine fall back onto the bean bag slightly. 
“No, princess, you have to come.” Clementine smiles to herself before standing up to placing her hands on her hips. 
“Nope, sorry.”
Louis flutters his eyelashes at her, bringing out his puppy dog eyes before moving closer to Clementine. He hopes this works on her because it works on most people, he can even see in the corner of his eye, Violet crumbling and slamming her hand on Aasim’s leg. “Come on Clementine, please.” Clementine looks back at her friend briefly before looking back at him. 
“No.”
Everyone boo’ed and complained as Clementine grabs her stuff and Louis hand. “I have to babysit my baby brother, and you’re going to help me.” She addresses the last part of the sentence to Louis who rolls his eyes gently, following behind the girl. 
“We all know that’s code for sex!” Marlon shouts as they both start to leave the room. 
“Louis is going to have to wait longer than that!”
~
Lee runs around the house picking up all the mess as well as trying to find his car keys, AJ is screaming in his highchair not wanting his Dad to leave him. 
“Daddy, it’s here.” Clementine hands Lee his car keys, he thanks her kissing the top of her head. 
“I’ll be back in an hour, I just really have to finish that paperwork sweetpea.”
“I know Dad, go.” She tries to push him out of the house. 
“And thank you too, Louis.”
“No problem, Paps.” Louis returns to feeding baby AJ who stops crying once the spoons meets his lips; Louis makes funny faces at the baby causing him to giggle almost choking on his own laugh. Clementine loves watching Louis play with AJ and call her Dad ‘Paps’. It makes it so real, a little too real. But she never bring up the fact that this isn’t real because she wants to feel like it is even when it isn’t.
“Everyone is going to be there, and I have to go because it’s my bro’s party. Open up AJ, woosh.” Louis guides the food into AJ’s mouth before turning to Clementine for a reply.
She sighs before laying down on her couch. “Fine, but I swear to go you can’t leave me alone Louis.” 
He turns to her almost jumping up and down. “Of course I won’t babe, thank you so much. You’re amazing. Isn’t she amazing AJ? She’s so great right?”
Clementine smiles at them closing her eyes to rest slightly, without Louis she would have had to babysit AJ all by herself and she’s been so stressed and tired from school she just can’t function. She’s unsure of how long she’s been laying there with her eyes closed but Louis joins her on the couch laying beside her with half of his body on top of her due to the lack of space. 
“AJ is sleeping, I put him to bed.”
“I don’t know what I would do without you Lou.” Clementine opens her eyes to meet Louis staring at her; she can see all his freckles up close, even the opens that overlap each other creating and even bigger freckle. Louis could see that Clementine was avoiding his eyes, he wants her to look at him even though she was but not at him. His hand grabs her cheek brushing thumb against it slightly, her eyes flutter shut slowly enjoying the feeling. 
“No, look at me.” Louis whispers against her skin, she doesn’t listen at first until he says it again this time in a more demanding tone. As soon as he eyes meet his, she slams her lips against his;. this is the second time that they have shared a kiss during this entire relationship. But it’s the first time that they’ve kissed because they wanted too and not because someone was coming and they had too, like the first time. 
Louis’ hand grips her face firmly as he pulls her into the kiss more, the uncomfortable position makes Louis move on top of her instead. Clementine’s arms wrap around his neck pushing him onto her to the point that if it was any further than it would stop her breathing. They pull away from a second only to get air before Louis mouth is on her neck, leaving soft kisses everywhere. A soft breathe of air leaves Clementine’s lips as she bits her lips, one leg moves around Louis waist as she moves him back to her lips. 
Clementine’s hands grab onto his shirt pulling him in closer, Louis lets out a small groan feeding more into her lips. She parts her lips asking for more to which he gives her, it wasn’t just a dry kiss anymore as their tongues met each other. Clementine could barely control her breathing before the front door slams open and Louis rolls off Clementine almost as quickly as he rushes towards the kitchen. 
Lee walks in with his back turned towards the door trying to get all the shopping bags into the house. “Hey kids, I did some shopping.”
Clementine is breathing heavy trying to compose herself and reply to her father; Louis can see that she is no state to reply muttering the best response he can. 
“That’s great Paps.” He shouts from the kitchen taking down a large amount of water from the glass in his hand. 
“W-we’re, um, going to a party Dad. Don’t wait up!” Clementine grabs her coat and rushes out of the house. Lee looks to Louis for an explanation, who has a red face, shrugs his shoulders and rushes after Clementine.
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Back at the farm, Elijah walks, dazed but relaxed, back to the house. He checks behind him once, twice, to see if Rocky, who had followed him to the edge of his parents' property, still sits in the woods, wagging his tail at Elijah.
He doesn't.
"You look like you've seen a ghost," Amanda says, as she steps out the front door. The sun is shining, bright and warm already for eight in the morning, and Elijah shakes the woods off of him as best he can.
While he's grateful the beast is a silly witch in the woods, the idea that someone out there just... lives in abandoned shack in his woods unsettles him.
"Not a ghost," Elijah says. He sighs. "Has this town always been this fucking creepy?"
Amanda cocks her head and looks at her son with a smile, then steps down the front steps and towards the hay truck. "The city has made you suspicious, my love." She waves the keys in the air, doesn't look back to Elijah. “Come on. I believe you promised me a trip to the farmer’s market.”
Amanda fiddles with the radio, sings along off-key with wrong lyrics, and Elijah absently brushes the mud from his jeans.
The market’s covered in small tables set up underneath tents. Sunlight shines through the trees, and Elijah all but forgets about Viola and Penny and their tiny shack in the woods. The air is sweet with the smell of apple cider and turnovers, and Elijah follows his mother past table after table of pickles, jams, fresh produce, pies, breads…
He last went when he was seventeen. Far too long ago. The smell of it brings him back to being a child, before he made such a shitty decision, before Josh—
“Elijah, can you take these apples back to the car? I’ve a few more tables I’d like to visit.”
Three bags of apples, Elijah takes to the car, tripping over tree roots and uneven, muddied ground. Passes tables selling food that has his stomach aching with hunger.
Just before the market closes off, though, Elijah notes a man, sitting at his table, his head rested in his hand, elbow on the table, flipping through a book with a bored look on his face. Customers seem to ignore him, as though he’s not there. Candles in mason jars are neatly lined up in front of him, a solitary empty spot where someone has bought one.
He seems to notice Elijah staring, because he lifts his head, locks gazes with him. A smile grows across his face.
“Interest you in some homemade candles, sir?”
Elijah makes a face. “I’m not a sir.” He should keep going, but—the logo of the candles. Elijah drops one of the bags of apples to pick up a candle. “This creature,” he asks, smoothing his thumb over the creature—thick hair, glowing eyes, fingers like nails. “What is it?”
With a shrug, the man says, “The Beast of Easthallow. Local legend. Man a few hundred years ago, back when Easthallow was just a mining town, claims to’ve seen it.” He cocks his head at Elijah. “There’s a book about it, you know. Adapted from Victor East’s journals.”
“So it’s real?”
Laughing, the man leans back in his chair. “Suppose that matters on whether you’re a believer.” He nods his head at the candle. “Supposed to smell like wildflowers if you see it. S’what the candle’s based on.”
Overhead, the sun hides behind dark storm clouds. Around them, the hum of chatter from the farmer’s market quiets for a minute.
“Can give you a discount if you buy the book, too.” He holds up a book, small, a plain black cover, the words THE BEAST OF EASTHALLOW embellished across the front.
Assuming, for a minute, that Elijah believes any of this, other than a crazy couple of witches living in the woods, he’s unemployed. Setting the candle back down, Elijah says, “I don’t have any money.”
He eyes the apples. “How about a few of those? They came from the Richard Orchard, right?” Elijah shrugs. “Two apples, then.”
Fine. Curiosity peaked, Elijah digs into the bag at his feet for two of the apples, without bruises, one still with a stem and leaf, and hands them over. Their fingers brush together, and Elijah’s lips twitch up in a smile, just for a split second, before he pulls back.
“Do you plan on hunting it?” the man says, dropping the apples into a bucket beside him.
“…Hunting it?”
“We also sell candles that smell like rotten wood and wet dog. Supposed to attract the Beast.”
Elijah snorts. “A candle that smells like garbage?” He shakes his head. “I’ll go with the wildflowers.” Maybe he can gift it to his mother for Christmas.
“I’ll just get you a receipt,” the man says. Elijah hears someone walk up behind him, and turns his head, sees Amanda stepping around counters, a single, small loaf of bread under her arm.
She smiles down at the man, currently scribbling out a receipt for Elijah, and says, “Good morning, Grant. All well at home?”
He lifts his head, looking between the two of them for just a beat or two before he smiles, pleasant and wide, and his eyes—
Elijah clears his throat, averts his gaze. His heart aches, as he thinks of Sean, back home. What used to be home. He wonders if the man he’d found Sean with would be comforting, in Elijah’s absence, or if he’ll find Elijah leaving cause for celebration.
“…fine, Mrs. Flynn.” Grant flashes her a smile, hands over the receipt to Elijah and says, “Have a good day.”
Elijah reaches for the receipt, and Grant winks as their fingers touch again.
As they leave, Amanda weaves her arm around Elijah’s, says, “That wasn’t so bad, was it? And I see you picked up some items as well.” She nods to the book, the candle in the bag. “Didn’t think you were a candle sort.” She smiles, reaches into the bags, plucks out an apple, and begins chattering on.
Elijah glances at the receipt. Ten digits, scribbled at the bottom—give me a call, if you’d like.
At the farm, Elijah thumbs over the receipt as he sits, reclined on the couch, listening as rain beats down on the tin roof. It’s dark, for mid-afternoon; a deep blue-grey overcast filtering the sun out and shadowing the fields.
Still better than the city.
He sighs. Reads the note again. Little early for hookups, isn’t it? Ezra considers himself fairly capable of moving on quickly, but still, if he thinks too much about Sean, something in his chest goes tight and the world feels too small. He could have gone to the other side of the country, to Australia or Japan, and still Sean would feel too close.
Fingers reach up behind him and pluck the receipt out of hand, though, and Elijah doesn’t even bother turning around to chastise his brother. Instead, he says, “Really? We’re being this childish, now?”
Josh reads the note out loud, makes an awwwww sound, and says, “What happened to Sean, McDreamy? Weren’t you guys happy-ever-after or whatever you want to call it?”
“We’re not in trouble,” Elijah says, but he doesn’t make an attempt at the receipt. He just rubs his eyes, wonders how long it’ll take Josh to give up on this. “And it’s none of your fucking business.”
It’s not a lie; they’re not in trouble. Elijah’s completely out of trouble. Feels better about this than he ever has. Josh, though, Josh takes that and runs with it, his eyes getting wide, and he says, “Holy shit. You’re not—“
“Josh—“ Footsteps are coming up from the basement steps, and fuck, Elijah’s not ready to admit that he’d failed in the city, that he ran home with his tail tucked between his legs, and no. They don’t need to know. They don’t need to know. Not yet. Not until Elijah can get on top of things, until he can 
When she reaches the top of the stairs, Amanda glances between them, offers a tentative smile. “Getting on, I hope?” She doesn’t wait for an answer, already heading for her bedroom with the laundry basket. “So nice to see the two of you in the same room without screaming…”
She leaves before Josh can say anything, thankfully, and with a pleased sigh, Josh holds the receipt back out. “S’cute. Taking a page out of your older bro’s book, lying to Mom and Dad.”
Refraining from reaching for the receipt, Elijah says, “I’m not lying to them. And would you stop it with the older bro shit?”
Holding his hands in mock surrender, Josh says, "All right. Just... interesting you're the one keeping secrets these days, is all."
Elijah watches him leave, jaw clenched, and lets out a frustrated groan when Josh is finally around the corner.
It's good, though, right, to meet people. In Easthallow. If he's going to be living here... he'll need a network. Grant can help with that.
He calls the number before he can tell himself not to.
"Elijah," he answers, and his voice is smoother, on the phone, than it really should be. "I wondered if you'd call."
"How do you know it's Elijah?"
A beat, then, "I had a feeling. I wanted to know if you’d be interested in getting a drink?” So the entire town can know about it. So Elijah can spend the evening shooting glances around the bar, wondering who he can trust and whether Grant’s one of those people or not. “About the Beast—“
And Elijah laughs, runs a hand through his hair, and wonders if the entire town is like this. “You don’t really believe in it, do you?”
“You’re meant to believe what you see, right?”
“I’ve seen this Beast,” Elijah says. “Didn’t seem so freaky to me.”
Grant makes a noise, like a scoff, but his voice holds no judgement. “Everyone knows about Viola.”
Fine. Just to sate his curiosity. “All right. Drinks, and you can tell me all about this furry little beast of yours.”
Grant meets him in town, dressed in a light jacket Elijah finds himself jealous of, in the misting cold. He reaches out for a handshake. "Good to meet you."
"You, too," Elijah says. "I thought I knew everyone in this town." He grew up here, went to school here. Graduated with twenty kids in his class. Grant... either he was older, younger, or... wasn't from here.
As though sensing Elijah's thoughts, he sends him a sidelong glance and says, "I grew up in the city. Parents divorced when I was little. Thought I'd do better there, but I always liked the country." His smile is warm, pleasant, and Elijah wonders if it helps with the cold or if he's blushing under Grant's gaze. "What about you?"
"City all the way," Elijah says. "Stepping in cow shit has never been my version of fun."
Grant laughs. It feels good, genuine; Elijah can't remember the last time he made someone laugh. "Plenty of other farms than cattle farms."
"Not according to my parents," Elijah says. "You know they started planting crops when I was fifteen, to help with running costs, and my dad flipped?" He did; Allan's a livestock man, through and through. Elijah still remembers the nights his parents stomped around downstairs, trying to make sense of their next plan.
"What happened? Nobody in Easthallow exports crops."
They take a seat at the bar. Grant holds up two fingers to the bartender, and soft country music plays from the corner of the room, and something settles in Elijah's stomach. He's used to drink menus, twenty minutes with Sean while he tries to decide what he wants, and it's like relief when the bartender slides two beers in front of them and disappears.
It's the little things Elijah loves about this town.
"I knew your brother," Grant says, as he digs his phone out his pocket. "Back in high school."
His mood sours, but Elijah tries not to let it. He peers into the bottle, thinks about downing it all in one go. Doesn't.
"He was a prick." Grant taps away on his phone. "Little fucker nearly drove my little sister insane."
Sounds like Josh. "He cheat on her? Josh is an asshole."
"Wouldn't give her the time of day, mostly. She thought they'd grow up, get married, have kids, whole nine yards. Josh found out and... she ended up homeschooling for the rest of high school."
He remembers that. Something faint, and, hell, Elijah didn't even know the girl, but Josh slept with her best friend and then there was all kinds of drama. Because of Josh. It's hard to believe anyone thought he was a catch, but people like the bad boy thing.
"Don't hold that against me, do you?"
Grant doesn't even lift his gaze to meet Elijah's. "If you were anything like your brother, you wouldn't be speaking with me."
He turns his phone to Elijah, finally, onto a homepage for THE BEAST OF EASTHALLOW. He clicks around a bit, checks out the first hand accounts--all written journalism style, with publishing dates and Grant's name at the top as the author--the photos.
"A lot of them are Viola," Grant says, gesturing to the phone with the beer. "She loves getting dressed ip on tourist weekends and scaring the shit out of the visitors in the cabins." He smiles, shakes his head.
"She's not the start of the rumor, then?" Elijah'd been sure... she could've seen something, made the costume as a joke, to keep people away from her house...
"Nah. Viola's big into local history. Or--Penny, her wife, is. Viola took a liking to the Beast 'cause it's mystical."
Grant's thigh rubs against Elijah's, just a little. Just enough to catch the fabric, enough for the pull to tune Elijah into how close they are everywhere. "Did you read the book?"
"Book?" Elijah echoes, then clears his throat. Grateful for the low lights that help hide his blush, Elijah adds, "Right. No. Didn't even crack the spine."
Like he expects it, Grant scrolls down through his phone again, until he stops at a very clear, very close photo. "This is the most famous ever taken. Fifteen years ago or something like that."
When Elijah lived here. Why the fuck didn't he ever hear about this? "Someone's screwing with me," Elijah says. "I grew up here, and we never had a fucking local cryptid, unless you count the town drunk."
"Fifteen years ago, no one used to see it."
"We don't see it now."
Tapping the screen of his phone, Grant says, "Twenty times in the last year."
It's Josh. It's gotta be fucking Josh, enlisting the entire fucking town, right? Found some freaky girl in the woods to scare him, some guy at the farmer's market to fuck with him, and...
That doesn't make sense, though. Josh didn't know he was coming, and Elijah hasn't been home that long. Is this... does Grant actually believe this shit? That there's really some fucking monster crawling around their little town? Easthallow's a trash heap, people and literal garbage. There’s no cause for why he might be…
Elijah huffs a laugh, shakes his head. Downs the rest of his beer and says, “So, okay. Let’s say I believe in your furry little friend, just for like, five seconds.” He’s still not convinced it isn’t Viola. That this entire set-up isn’t something done to fuck with newbies. “Why only see it now?”
The question of the hour. Grant glances up at him, his eyes twinkling. Something there lights a fire on all of Elijah’s nerves, leaves him feeling warm, pleased, arousal building in his stomach. Grant’s an attractive guy; the muscles that scream outdoor labor, a five o’clock shadow Elijah wants to feel against his skin. Dark eyes Elijah could get lost in, and smooth, tan skin, and hair just long enough to pull.
Shit, he’s tapping his phone again, eyebrow raised like he knows Elijah’s imagining being held down by him, and he says, “Hundred year anniversary of old man Lowell’s suicide.”
“He killed himself?”
“So said the newspapers,” Grant said. “Lots of conflicting reports, though. Another one said he died in the old mine tunnels. Pushed from the roof of the Carnegie library… One said he got caught in a wood-chipper.”
Grimacing, Elijah takes a drink of his beer. “Poor way to go.”
But Grant’s voice is thoughtful when he asks, “Is it? Head first, maybe…” He shrugs.
Silence settles between them, Elijah picking at the label on his beer, Grant tapping his fingers rhythmically on the bar top, before Grant finally says, “So what brings you to Easthallow?”
It isn’t a secret, not really, but Elijah hesitates nonetheless. It’s only been a few days since Elijah spoke to Sean, but it feels like it’s been weeks. Easthallow seems so far removed from the city. Always has. “Bad breakup,” he says, finally, then, “or—not really. Just a breakup.”
“He cheat on you?”
Elijah turns his gaze to Grant. How the fuck does he know. He asks as much, and Grant just chuckles, shrugs one shoulder. Ducks his head in something like embarrassment. “I haven’t told anyone.”
“You have a vibe,” Grant says. “Definitely not from here. Wouldn’t come to Easthallow unless you had family. No one comes here.”
“Viola and Penny?”
With a twitch of his lips, Grant says, “I stand corrected.”
Elijah finishes his beer. Returns it to the coaster. Beside him, Grant pockets his phone. “I could show you Old Man Lowell’s place, if you’re up for it.”
Making a face, Elijah says, “Doesn’t that place have to be ancient by now? How’s it still standing?”
Before Grant can answer, Elijah’s phone buzzes in his pocket, incessant against his thigh. He apologizes as he checks it—his mother.
“Sorry, dear,” she says, but sounds exhausted, “your father has a situation with the cattle. Can you come home, help him out?”
Like a child, Elijah says, “Isn’t Josh home to help.”
Her voice is thick with false sweetness when Amanda says, “I’m asking you.”
He doesn’t have much of a choice, then. Offers a tight smile to Grant when he gets off the phone, pockets his phone. “Dad needs me. Cattle probably got loose.”
But Grant’s gaze snaps to Elijah’s, and his questions are lightning fast, one after another, until Elijah reaches out and grips Grant’s wrist. Intimate, for a man he’d met earlier that day. For a man with a curiosity for the unknown and a crazy loom in his eye when he talks about it. “I’m sure he’d welcome the help. My brother’s useless.”
“Bringing a strange man back to the house already?” Grant tsks, but leaves a twenty on the bar as he stands. “What will your parents say?”
Nothing, if Elijah has anything to do about it. “My mother knows you my name. I’d hardly consider you strange.”
The farm is a cacophony of noises when Elijah arrives there. A loud barking, his father’s deep voice as he hollers, the loud, angry mooing of a cow that does not want to follow orders.
“Yikes,” Grant says, closing the door to the driver’s side of his SUV. “Suddenly glad my parents run an orchard.”
“It’s not always like this,” Elijah says by means of explanation. Never once has he heard a dog barking here. His father’s allergic. He can make out his mother standing at the edge of the field, though, makes his way across the yard towards her. Grant’s headlights shine out toward her.
“Elijah,” she says, gripping his arm as he stops by her side. “Your father’s been at this for an hour. Something spooked the cattle.”
No shit. Even from here he can make out the door to the barn, broken off the hinges. “Dad leave the barn open?”
Amanda shakes her head. “No. Strangest thing. The hinges are bent.”
A chill runs through him; the hair on the back of his neck stands up. He takes a quick glance around the yard—lit up by the emergency lights his father had installed—but sees nothing, save for Grant as he makes his way towards them. “Not surprising,” he says. “Cattle are strong. Especially if the bull got out.” A beat. “So someone broke in?”
She takes a second to glance Grant’s way, a twinkle in her eye as he reaches out to shake her hand. “Grant. Didn’t realize Elijah was bringing help.” Before he can offer anything by means of explanation, she adds, “The more the merrier.”
Another bark sounds from the field, and Amanda whistles. “And this fucking dog. No idea where it came from.”
At her whistle, the dog comes bounding up to her, tongue wagging out of its mouth. In the dark, it’s a little different, but Elijah would recognize it anywhere. “Rocky?”
He barks, wags his tail. Amanda looks between them with a frown. “You know him?”
Elijah reaches to scratch his ears. “I met his owner the other day—” He almost says in the woods; doesn’t want to tell her what he was doing out there. “—does he come here often?”
“More than we’d like.”
Behind them, Grant adds, “Could it have been the dog who spooked them?”
Amanda shrugs. “Not likely. Allan nearly got one back to the barn before it ran off again.”
“You guys check the barn out?”
What? No. Elijah really doesn’t want to go play detective right now. He wants to go to the field, help his father wrangle the half-dozen cows and the bull back into their barns. But Grant’s already eyeing the barn, and Elijah’s not going to leave him on his own.
Not until he trusts what the fuck is going on here.
“Be my guest,” Amanda says. “After that, can you guys head out to the field?”
“Will do, Mama.”
Rocky follows at their heels, quieting the closer the get to the barn. The hair on the back of Elijah’s neck still stands on end, but, save for his mother and Grant, the farm’s clear—nothing out of the ordinary.
Grant whistles as he pulls on the door. “Damn thing’s strong.”
“Thing would’ve taken a truck to pull it off the hinges like this.” Elijah rubs his hand along the bent metal. The hinges look twisted, ruined beyond repair, the metal worn and fragile in places. “They’d’ve heard it.”
“No one’s gonna take a damn truck to a barn door, either. Easier to steal the cattle out of the pasture.” Grant seems lost in thought for a few seconds, then pulls a small flashlight from his pocket. “And that’s still a lot of work for half a dozen cattle.”
Old cattle, too. Allan does it more as a hobby, now, than as a way to make money. Breeds the cattle, trades them to keep the bloodlines clean. Elijah remembers some of it from when he used to live here. His father’s trips to cattle auctions.
“Elijah,” Grant says. His tone, soft, strange, not quite a whisper but not his normal tone, piques Elijah’s interest, and he follows Grant’s gaze to where he’s brushing his fingers along where the door used to sit against the side of the barn. He doesn’t see anything at first, just like Grant’s pressing against nothing, and then…
Three long, thick gashes in the wood, splintering the siding out. Like nails, fingernails, but… there’s nothing that could do that. A bear, maybe a cougar, but… “You’re seeing this, too, right?”
Anger flares in Elijah’s stomach. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.” Josh. He’s always been a joker, but—fuck, getting the cattle involved in his homecoming prank on Elijah? This isn’t some petty joke he’s playing, built from an old sibling rivalry he won’t let go of anymore. This isn’t just between them, and as soon as Elijah gets him alone, he’s going to tear his brother a new one.
He turns on his heel, back towards the field, towards where he can hear his father making whooping noises towards the cattle in the dark. Josh is—damn it. Usually better about this sort of thing. It’s not the first time one of his jokes has gone too far, but it’s about to be the last.
He comes across one of the cows before he sees his father. Behind him, he hears Grant’s footsteps. The cow makes a noise, distressed, and starts to stand. Elijah holds a hand out, palm up, and says, “Easy girl, you’re okay,” in a voice he hopes is soothing.
Still, she only makes concerned noises, struggling to get up, get away. Elijah turns, slow, moves so she’ll run towards the house, not farther into the field, still talking in quiet tones. “Easy—let’s get you back to the barn, yeah? Back to sleep? Bet Dad’s got some treats for you. How ‘bout you follow me?”
She moos again; this time, her voice breaks, and she stands, slow, staring off into the darkness behind Elijah. “Grant, you’re freaking her out,” Elijah says. “Can you back away, just a bit?”
No sound, though; no answer. Not even footsteps as Grant moves. Elijah turns, ready to ask him again, when he sees it—fur, thick, eyes glowing yellow in the dark, shining in the light from the yard. It stands tall, taller than Elijah by at least a foot, and its teeth glimmer, sharp and long. Arms, impossibly long, hang at its sides, its chest heaving with each breath.
It’s different, up close. Taller, thinner. Creepier. He thinks about Viola, about how her costume looks up close, and knows, without a doubt, this isn’t her.
His throat goes dry, his blood rushes like a river through his ears. He can’t scream, doesn’t know what he would say if he could, and hopes to tell Josh off for this, later, when the thing snarls, and the next thing Elijah sees is the large, clawed hand that reaches out, as if from the shadows, and punches him in the head.
He doesn’t remember falling.
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dunkalfredo · 7 years ago
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Im in love with your vision of Infinite and Rookie and i want to hear some of your sweet headcanons about their time together. If anyone asked something similar, refer me to this post, please. Thanks!
alskdjnsjklnljkls tysm!!!! yeah sure ill share some headcanons. i did a post on a similar topic about a month ago but that’s more their individual personalities/aesthetics than actual relationship material so ill go ahead and add on some stuff here.
i should note that portions of this are based heavily off of the idea that they grew up together so prepare for some au territory at this point. my backstory for them is becoming so intricate jfc;;;;;; i really hope ur not disappointed with this answer i have like an entire pre-forces narrative planned out in my head at this point OTL if u were hoping for more general stuff just lemme know i can give you some more hcs for that (there’s already some but there’s also Backstory stuff that i can’t really explore through oneshot format)
this is entirely self indulgent tbhhhh anyways click that mf Keep reading button
there’s a lot of like. casual touch. lotsa hugs and leaning on each other and resting their chin on the other’s shoulder (or top of head depending on who’s who bc height difference) while looking over them at what they’re doing and its really rooted in their learning early on how much Gadget loves that sweet sweet Physical Contact (if u scratch behind his ears he will melt, guaranteed, you’ll have yourself a Boneless Gadget with a two-liter coke)
if it’s raining out gadget will insist on doing something that’s not just sitting inside all day but snugglin w/ infinite ends up tempting him into doing Exactly That lol
there’s a lot of companionable silence between them when it’s just Them Alone in a Room. sure they talk and chat and joke but there are so many times where it’s just,,, being Together,,, and enjoying being in the other’s presence as they each do their own thing
sorta going into childhood/backstory stuff but uhhhh:
starting freshman year of highschool they started just bein each other’s dates to school dances even though they were “just friends” for like half of that timespan . i love cheesy stuff like that im sorry bro i had to include that tidbit i know it’s super specific and particular to my own backstory for them but just, they’re best buds and they gonna have a good time at homecoming lol
please imagine: those cute pre-dance pictures that parents take at the stairwell or front porch or somethin right before their kids leave, but with gadget and infinite. gadget’s got braces and they dont really fit in his mouth and his lenses reflect the light in the photo and oops infinite blinked and his shirt is too big and tbh their suits in gen just don’t really fit them right, gadget’s shirt is untucked and infinite’s tie is crooked but it’s okay, they’re both smilin reeeeaaaal big (and besides they figure out how to look Aesthetically Pleasing by junior year)
summers were hot in their hometown (note: i grew up in the north so i know nothing of True Heat, bear with me on this one.) most evenings were spent out on gadget’s fam’s back porch, cold towels resting on the backs of their necks, sweat in and under their fur, and they’re melting into the wood of the deck, fan plugged into that one weird outlet on the outside of the house that’s really more a fire hazard than anything else but the cool air is nice. they’re just lounging around reading comic books and listening to music on infinite’s old zune (lots of mid-2000s punk rock bands bc what else were u expecting) and in later years when they’re in that teen puppy love stage they’re trying to cuddle but it’s TOO DAMN HOT OUTSIDE so they resort to like, gentle hand holding, infinite reading some pretentious literary work or whatever and gadget spacing tf out next to him
when they graduate and are assigned a partner to walk down the aisle with they still end up w/ each other even though technically the partners are chosen according to alphabetical order and they’re on opposite ends of that list whOOPS how’d they do that? (hint: last minute shuffling in line)
when they move outta their small lil home town and into The Big City (im gonna say that would be Sunset Heights to tie in some canon plot relevance) they move in together and share a flat. a) its more financially manageable to just split housing costs like that and b) it’s been a dream their entire lives to live together when they’re older so oh!!! they’re older now!!!!! time to live together
(okay that’s all for backstory stuff back to reg hcs)
neither can cook but its ok
it may seem like they bicker a lot but it’s usually either the like, joke argue of “what do you mean craft mac n cheese is gross take that back” or reprimands like “it’s one a.m. time to sleep u Fool” (self-care is important, lads). they actually communicate really well so high-stakes arguments aren’t super common (and when they do happen they dont tend to explode. i wanted to have them be the type that argue for understanding and not to prove they’re right, so that greatly affects the outcomes of their disputes.)
infinite loves to hum while he’s doing things, or just in gen, and his voice is very low and smooth and gadget looooooves it, so much. they’ll be, i dunno, doing some mundane thing, like maybe they’re out getting groceries or doin dishes or something (i love me that domestic content) and he’ll start humming quietly and it just, it really grounds gadget in a way that sometimes he doesn’t even know he needs till infinite does it.
anyone here ever played bayonetta? any a yall remember those bits where there’s a woman in bayo’s memories singing and/or humming ‘fly me to the moon’ all quiet and low? think that but just,,,, pitched down,,,, yeah,,,
the tunes are usually very slow and while not so much melancholy theyre just? i dunno melodic in the same lax, smooth-tempo’d way a lot of melancholy songs are? i dunno i like quiet, introspective infinite and aesthetics that reflect that
here’s a long one: about a month before infinite “goes missing” and forces happens, infinite lands a job at a local news outlet as one of the column writers and even tho he’s more into prose than journalism he’s so fuckin pumped. it’s mostly just excitement over not doing cashier work and having a money-makin outlet he’s at least somewhat interested in lol …aaaaaand the way ship headcanon works into this bullet is that when he finds out that he landed the job he so excited that when gadget walks into the room (it’s morning and gadget literally was just gonna get some coffee, he’s still in his pajamas, he’s got bedhead) infinite sees him and whoops he tackle-hugs him and then whoops he knocked them both onto the floor but its cool gadget kinda let it happen and when infinite tells him what happened and apologizes he’s now also super excited and happy for him so now there’s two (2) people screaming inside (and out) about this awesome development
here’s a short one: they wear each other’s clothes a lot
gadget’s v cuddly in his sleep so he gets really clingy w/ infinite when a) it’s early morning and they’re just waking up b) it’s Late o’ clock at night and they’re chillin at home or c) he’s Actually asleep and within like three feet of infinite
i dont really know how to end this lol i dont really wanna just start repeating myself and i might think of other stuff later but for now pls consider the following: when they sleep whoever’s big spoon ends up resting one hand over the other’s heart and it’s super sweet
oh and they smooch a lot (i told you this response was self indulgent)
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leaughrilke · 8 years ago
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Kara and Lena dealing with any of the kids being bullied?
HOO BOY 
well kara “fight me” danvers and lena “come at me bro” luthor dont take kindly to anything or anyone threatening their kiddos, let’s just put that out there now like........they are such mama bears, it is ridiculous.  their kiddos are sometimes a lil embarrassed like god moms we have it under control but also they three hundred percent appreciate it, appreciate the security that comes in knowing their moms are always in their corner
SO finn and maia dont rlly get bullied??  finn does once (literally just once) but he handles it himself, is so disarmingly kind and literally befriends his bully.  to be fair, they’re like seven but still.  and maia??  is literally kind of terrifying like no one’s going to fucking mess with her
what im saying is that its stella that gets bullied and she gets bullied kind of a lot??  its through her entire life tbh, or at least her entire time in school and she hides a lot of it tbh??  like there’s stuff that her moms dont find out abt until later, until its too late for them to do anything abt it bc stella has this habit of just internalizing everything and repressing the shit out of it.  but they do know abt most of it and like..........u know that gif of kara throwing down her purse when lena’s getting arrested?  pls picture that when i tell u what happens bc that’s.......that’s what’s happening
but yeah, she’s small and soft and cries easily, is a little weird and v intense and like??  she doesnt benefit from the innate magnetism her siblings have a la kara.  like she’s v sweet and endearing in her own right, but stella is very much not of this world in a way thats entirely different from her siblings.  where maia and finn grow into gods, essentially, the best analogy for stella would probably be like a fae or smth??  smth obviously not of this world, enough so that it makes some ppl uncomfortable
but its elementary school and kids are kids and they dont have the words to explain why they dont like the littlest danvers, so they do the basic kid bullying like excluding stella from stuff and calling her names and at some point it escalates and she starts coming home with the knees or seat of her pants covered in dirt, ripped up palms from getting shoved or tripped and she has friends, she does, but they’re the kids that are also getting bullied so its not as if any of them are going to stick up for each other, they’re all just trying to get by
when kara and lena find out about it 
which they only do bc kara happens to be at the school to drop off maia’s book report that she left on the kitchen counter and decides to swing by the other kiddos to say hi for a minute and she happens to show up during stella’s recess, when the teachers are mediating an incident between stella and this girl and stella’s full sobbing, can hardly catch her breath and kara’s incredibly angry in that moment, like who did this, whose mom does she need to call
and the teachers spot her and one comes over and explains the situation, and like, to be clear, the teachers are kind of just learning abt this too???  like i got picked on a bit when i was little and those kids were always so good at figuring out the best moment to do whatever it was they wanted to do, always the second the teacher looked away, so theyre doing their best, only found out bc one of the teachers had a sobbing stella ask if she could go back to the classroom for the rest of recess
but basically this girl called stella a weirdo, said some shitty stuff abt stella being adopted, was basically the meanest you can be as a kid without like physically hurting stella, and they’re handling it and like kara kind of gets it, she does, they have protocol, but thats her kiddo crying and she’s like what exactly are you doing to handle it
and the teacher’s like well we’ll have a mediation with the school counselor and they’ll sign a contract but like.....and kara’s v rarely like this, she rlly is, she’s usually v understanding and gives everyone the benefit of the doubt, but she’s remembering all the times stella’s seemed like she didnt want to go to school, remembering all the times she’s come home covered in dirt, the way she’s been extra clingy recently and she’s like why does stella have to sign a contract and the teachers sort of......like well its to make sure that everyone behaves nicely towards one another and kara’s tempted to argue this point, but stella’s still sobbing and has just caught sight of her, is already running towards her, so instead she just asks politely that she and lena be included in the mediation and informs the teacher that she’ll be taking stella home early today
stella kind of falls asleep in the car, so kara takes the opportunity to call lena and lena’s like Ready 2 Fight tbh, she’s like okay so when are we meeting this kid’s mother to duel (this is paraphrased ofc) and kara’s like i dunno but do you have a meeting this afternoon?  stella’s really upset
technically lena has several meetings this afternoon, but she’s already cancelled abt half of them by this point in the conversation and she’s sure jess is well on her way to cancelling the rest for her, so she packs up and meets kara at home and stella wakes up on the couch, crawls out from her blanket burrito and sprawls across her moms laps and they let her pick the movie so they end up watching princess and the frog and moana and the aristocats while stella dozes, still redfaced from crying
later, lena and kara press her gently for details bc like they’ll fight anyone for her with zero info but information would probably make it a lil easier, so they get names and dates (as accurate as a seven year old can give) and they spend a lot of that afternoon just cuddling stella, asking v gently that she tell them when things like this happen bc they can’t make things better if they dont know whats happening, reminding her that they love her a whole lot, that everything that other girl said is just what a very small, very mean person says when they’re angry that you wont behave like them
so then theres the mediation and its turned more into a mediation between the parents bc this girl went home and told her parents that stella danvers lied, that she was just joking abt what she said but lena sees the immediate flash of disdain in the woman’s eyes when she walks in, kara sees the barely concealed sneer on the dad’s face and wow, yeah, okay, she sees where their daughter gets it
it boils down to this: stella is v much the victim and everyone knows it, so kara and lena throw their collective weight around a little (and they rarely do this, truly, they want their kiddos to learn to handle their own problems without relying on reputation or money or whatever) and get this girl switched into a different class and may or may not start a blood feud between their families
but just a small one 
as stella gets older, it’s different??  like she doesnt want her moms getting involved when she gets picked on (and lbr, its the same girl bullying her, just with different lackeys and lena grumbles under her breath abt a mini veronica sinclair every time stella comes home bearing a different story) but she does as they asked when she was little, she tells them about most of the stuff, usually keeps the really bad stuff quiet tho.  they do end up finding out abt most stuff, no small thanks to maia hearing abt a lot of shit (tbh she’s like.......the final stop in the rumor mill??  she hears it all and shuts that shit down) and reporting it right back to their moms
though sometimes she........handles it before it gets back to them
like this one time there were these boys that were harassing tiny freshmen stella (she went on a date with one of them and told him to fuck off when he tried to feel her up, so he spreads it around school that stella’s several words that make maia’s hands shake with anger), and like??  its not something to involve their moms in, considering they thought stella was at ari’s house when she went on the date and she’d get in some trouble for lying, so maia just quietly ruins their lives.  she punches one of them once, and they’re huge babies who talk a lot of shit and never expect to get called on it so she tells them with no uncertainty that they’ll be apologizing publicly and that if she catches them within ten yards of stella, she’ll make them wish they were never born
but mostly maia tells their moms bc she may not have ever gone through this shit, but she knows that just beating ppl up isnt the answer???  wont actually change anything.  so kara and lena hear abt most of what stella goes through and they keep up their steady reassurances, that stella’s beautiful, smart, different in the best way, that she doesnt have to be like anyone else, that they love her just the way she is while they also fight the pta president, this girl’s mom, three teachers that think stella just needs to toughen up (they actually get one of them........not fired, per se, but she doesnt return the next year), an unsympathetic counselor and just abt anyone else that looks at stella the wrong way
like u know how the kids rally around lena and sort of......diffuse the impact of whatever shit the public’s pulling???  the family does the same for stella
eventually it gets bad enough that kara and lena sit down with stella and ask if its even worth it for her, if she even wants to stay at the school or if she’d rather switch to a smaller school that’s a bit more......understanding??  and stella thinks abt it for a long time, and she appreciates the offer???  she rlly does, but she’s never seen her moms run from a fight and she’s not abt to run from this one
the get stella’s bully’s mom kicked off the pta for unbecoming behavior tho
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yuissamidare · 8 years ago
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aight aight lets do this
zombie au
i wanted??? to develop the side characters more because i love them and they make me super happy when they get on screen and i went to sleep and woke up in the dead of night like. Ah. I Know.
the gist was dekapan creates a virus that mimics those weird wasp things that inject venom in caterpillars and wasps and leave them zombie-fied until they end up sacrificing themselves for the wasps babies. it works like my theory for gakkou gurashi and idk the zombies should follow their everyday routine expect that they also kill people. i’ve scrapped that idea and like, recreated how the zombies work but shhhh this part is a Super Secret.
he’s having trouble with money and! he loves science! he loves messing up and starting over and finding that one xyz fit that makes everything click how he wants to! but that costs money, and it’s money he doesnt have, so? he calls a kid he used to babysit and get along with for some help. hatabou gets him a job with a sketchy government probably trying to cure the common cold or make it impossible to burn your skin in the sun or something so of course he does the work given to him, because money is money, but the moment it gets on tv and is announced to the world dekapan calls everyone like 'hey guys dont take the vaccine something fuckys going on' and then the zombie outbreak starts and everyone gets split up and they find each other eventually after Bad Things and everyone gets fucked up about it.
people who we dont get to see pair up find each other and begrudgingly work together.
jyushimatsu and todomatsu are w matsuyo!! she has them go on a trip to the mall with her, and it’s very densely packed and a trains ride from home  (jyushimatsus here to carry bags and todomatsus here bc oohhh a mall far away). the outbreak happens while theyre in the mall, and momma and todomatsu get separated from jyushimatsu for a little while -- they do find him again, and momma decks a zombie in the face. todomatsu cries. if i were to write this, i’d focus like??? 2 - 3 chapters focusing on them being in the mall, finding a group of other survivors, and then leaving the group. depending on length and my Stamina which is. not good.
next group is totoko and karamatsu!!! and. its not because of.... anything. but totoko!! if anything is really strong and i can see her carrying an iron will and inspiring other people to follow he lead and! i like the dynamic they had with that like One Interaction. idk the beginning all too well?? like how they meet up and stick together, but i have everything after that pretty clear in my head. this would be??? the second arc of the story maybe? it take a while for them to actually get along and things go Bad in the start because ahaha karamatsu is a Fuck Up, and after that karamatsu just stops trying to talk to her and just trails behind while totoko vehemently refuses to let him help her with anything. and i actually?? dont wanna say too much about this because. ITS SURPRISE. but after they start getting along karamatsu gives her a fishbone braid, and she talks about missing her brother and they do some Feelings Talk.
idk what the fuck to do with osomatsu, ichimatsu, and choromatsu??? someones learning medicine and surgery from dekapan, someones getting yelled at by chibita while hatabou mediates, and someone starts stealing things with iyami and then starts crying in the back of his van after a close call, but idk who because they all keep flip flopping positions in my head. like, at first ichimatsu was getting yelled at, but then i put him with iyami, but then im like ‘ohhh doctor ichimatsu’. then osomatsu was with chibita n hatabou, then i was like ‘but oh he and iyami have a great dyamic’. and choromatsu was with dekapan at first bt then i was :/ with that and put him with chibita. those three are hecking me up idk what to do.
paranormal investigators
 We Are All Dependant On Our Brothers
the matsuno bros start up a ghost bustin company thats set up in a run down project and they’re all crowed up in a shitty apartment funded by hatabou and todomatsus part time job with equipment provided by dekapan because after high school it was decided that ‘shit lets hunt some ghost’ and everyone was like ‘yea sure.’
it was spawned by a dream i had where choromatsu and karamatsu are on a case and choros like 'k we gotta distract the ghost' and karas like 'got it' and while choros doing. whatever. karamatsu comes out in a bathrobe and sashays like 'ooh noo ;)) i sure hope no ghosts are going to get me while im naked and vulnerable ;)))' and choros like. 'who gave you permission to be such garbage.' and. oh. he did. 
and then later in the day a stray thought where osomatsu and karamatsu got confronted by a ghost thats like ‘ICHIMATSU MATSUNO!!! YOU, MY ENEMY WHOVE IVE TRACED DOWN FROM BARBADOS TO THE ARAN ISLANDS TO-’ then osomatsu cuts him off like ‘bro we arent ichimatsu’ and the three of them stare at each other for ten minutes before karamatsu offers to call him for the ghost and the ghost is like ‘!!!! could you?? i mean, im still damning you both to hell but’ and then ichimatsu picks up the phone, and as soon as the ghost starts talking he expels it in 0.0000000000000000000000001 seconds.
superheros
the brothers are b-rate superheros who end up in the newspapers sometimes. iyami and chibitas That Dude who ends up in hostage situations all the time and begrudgingly drive them home and make sure they eat even though they claims to hate them. its actually.... based of the storyline for my ocs so i wont actually talk about that again. nnu9mubvufe8n.
again, they live in a shit ass project but they live right next door to each other instead of crowding in One Apartment, its two with three each. they are all actively looking for day jobs because while the government pays well they struggle being adults. but this time adults with superpowers.
rpg/video game
like. back in the naru.to fandom there was a point where video game aus were really popular, like the whole grinding/gaining stats/unlocking new areas thing n all that and it surprisingly worked really well when written right?. so i was thinking about that and spacing out and i was like Oh Fuck. so this au got birthed. osomatsus the king, karas the knight, jyushi is a prince who gets kidnapped, ichis prince #2, choromatsus a wandering mage, n todos the royal advisor. 
jyushimatsu gets kidnapped in the dead of night, and osomatsus like ‘what the flying fuck karamatsu get over here lets go get him back.’ so they leave, and have ichimatsu look after the kingdom for him. hes like 'wait what please im' and is thrust into power anyways. he and todomatsu are surprisingly competent leaders and the kingdom does really good under him, even better than with osomatsu?? though he locked himself in his room for the first week and todomatsu just kept banging on the door OPEN UP YOU FUCK YOU HAVE PAPERWORK. and its an insanely huge amount because osomatsu keeps putting it off unless someone watches him and he does all the stuff like funding the armies and expanding territories before stuff like regulating taxes and funding schools and hospitals.
jyushimatsu escapes on his own after a day n is like HMMMM HOW TO GET HOME..... but then he enters a little run down village and meets homura and falls In Love and they spend time together and he eventually just forgets to come home because hes so happy with her
meanwhile with the idiot eldest duo. karamatsu doesnt know how to fucking.... spend money so when they meet choromatsu whos like the stop n shop npc he gives him all the money he has for an enchanted pair of ankle warmers that he could put his face on and that can react to his emotions. osomatsus like ‘what the entire fuck bro’ and goes to get their money back, but then ends up spending all his money on a charm thatll increase his gambling luck.
‘we’ve been bamboozled, my dearest king. our money taken right before our eyes as a miser deceived us and robbed us of everything we’re worth,’ ‘wanna beat him up, karamatsu?’ ‘of course i do.’
choromatsus like ????? wtf its not my fault you two dont know how to spend money. but they fight, and osomatsus like ‘join our party!!’ and they take a few days to convince him but he does join and he and osomatsu hit it off really well, and osomatsu decided after everything, hes going to adopt choromatsu. 
(’but we’re the same age, my king’ karamatsu says in response to his proposal. 
‘FINE, then ill get mom to adopt him, geez.’ 
then they meet chibita and n chibita and karamatsus like ‘if youre taking choromatsu, im taking chibita in if he says yes’ and osomatsus like ‘ask mom first’)
the three of them go to the place jyushimatsu was taken to, beat everyone up, and then realize he isnt there. so they just. dejectedly walk into a nearby village for rest and chibita gives them free beer.
they meet jyshimatsu an hour later on a date with homura and yes. they decide to adopt her as a sister too. (is someone marrying into your family considered adoption?? idk but everyones family now, no excuses.)
royalty/split at birth
i hate angst i just wish everyone could be happy, i say as i look through my notebook with angsty plot points as i reference my life.
the gist is: the cold color trio living in slums rather than a palace but then oso finds out OH SHIT WE HAVE MORE BROTHERS WE GO GET THEM and everyones stressed the fuck out
as soon as osomatsu finds out he has troops scour the kingdom for the them, with the directions ‘there are three more people with my face, go get em’ and he sends troops out. to everyone outside the castle this is a very ?????!!!!!!!!!! thing???because the royal family has solidified themselves as Bad Selfish people who tax unfairly and dont care about the poor. like, the rich people are all like oh! i wonder what the royal family is planning theyre so good to our kingdom ha ha! while the poor people are freaking the fuck out.
the cold colors only get a brief warning about the troops coming and the first thing ichimatsu does when he hears this is go and break all the fancy plates and choromatsus like ‘wtf are you doing!!!’ and ichimatsu just looks at him like ‘i love and respect my family so im doing what i need to’ and karamatsu takes that as his cue to take his mothers valuables and hide them under the floorboards and in the walls where the stucco breaks away and choromatsu writes a note to their mom Just In Case.
they actually do get taken and theyre fucking shocked. like, instead of the royals taking everyones valuables like they expected, theyre taking them??? and the troops are no help theyre just like ‘kay go take two sets of coats and three sets of day wear’ and they have them leave straight away.
an abrupt abduction is gonna stir up shit in the village especially if they only take the boys and leave their parents and friends. imagine how paranoid they'll be. ‘oh no what if im going next' 'i hear that theyre taking our boys now and selling them off to foreign labor' 'theyre taking our children as punishment for not being able to afford tax' ‘i heard things breaking in their home what if they got taken away for resisting’
imagine all the drama and discomfort theyll feel when they see the other bros living in the lap of luxury why their friends and family suffer like :)))
its frustrating and tense for everyone because osomatsu expected them to integrate without issue. jyushimatsu doesnt understand why they get so mad at him and refuse to be his friend. todomatsu doesnt understand why all these poor people are a problem. as long as youre happy and healthy it's fine! theres no need to concern yourself with what doesnt directly affect you. if you dont see it its not happening so its best to ignore it.
ballet
osomatsu does ballet again and is happy and has found something he loves and enjoys and everyone supports him. basically, he starts feeling nostalgic and then starts watching youtube videos and goes ‘haha pah! i can do that’ and then he realizes ‘holy shit this is something i wanna spend the rest of my life doing’
sophie even wrote a fic about it and its great and every time i read it my heart pounds ten thousand times a second and i start smiling so hard my cheeks hurt.
detectives
jyushimatsu’s an overworked forensic scientist, choromatsu’s an exasperated detective, osomatsus is watson, todomatsu’s head of the branch, and ???? ichimatsu where are you??
karamatsu’s fucking dead but he aint important.
they solve mysteries n do detective stuff.
theres also another au thats like platonic soulmate thing but eh 
6 notes · View notes
jimdsmith34 · 7 years ago
Text
Betches Love This College: University of Southern California
The land of beautiful people, beautiful weather, and a beautiful fucking campus, the University of Southern California is probs the most collectively beautiful school in the country. And if you dont believe that sweeping generalization, which you obvi should, trust the movies. USCs movie-like campus has been featured in , , (2, ugh), and was even Harvard in . What, like its hard?
In the heart of Los Angeles, its no surprise that USC is in a shit ton of movies and TV shows. Its also no surprise that USC is on the top of thousands of graduating seniors wish lists every year. A weirdly perfect mix of academics and partying, USC is the place that all the pretty, popular, and annoyingly smart kids from your high school wanted to go (or actually went if they could afford it).
The People
Greeks: Even though the USC administration has really fucked up with the Greek system in recent years, rushing a fraternity and joining a sorority are def the pinnacle moments of freshman year. And once you go Greek, you never go back (even if your fraternity is kicked off the row, looking at you SAE). After a record number of freshmen hospitalizations due to alcohol poisoning on the row this decade, the administration started freaking the fuck out and made the row dry. Right. Well, Los Angeles is in a fucking drought, President Nikias. Banning alcohol is not only inhumane, its fucking immoral for the environment.
USC is honestly too big of a school to claim that everyone goes Greek. But everyone you want to know is Greek, and every great party is Greek. So like, you decide.
GDIs: …but dont even get the God Damn Independents (GDIs) started on the assholes in the Greek system. Theres a super divisive shift between the non-Greeks and the Greeks, especially at the start of freshman year. Super eager freshmen girls obvi need to wear their American Apparel sorority tanks to class every day of syllabus week. Bros make it known that theyre in a fraternity with their hazing ritualsseriously, Sigma Chi? Not letting your pledges talk for the first week of classes? Fucking weird. And the geeds watch this all with amazed, nerdy, and judgmental looks. Which tbh, the judgment kind of makes sense, seeing as one fraternity manages to spend over $50,000 in one night on its Frost party every year. And that budget doesnt even count the money that its fraternity members spend on snow in the form of nose candy. So to GDIs, fraternity and sorority assholes are the worst. Got it.
Athletes: If youre an athlete at USC, youre probably from California, and youre probably the best of the best. And if you play water polo, volleyball or beach volleyball, youre probably going to win a national championship. Or maybe youll go to the Olympics one year, because USC has had more Olympians than any other school. So casual.
The athletes all hang out in the same area of campusthe John McKay center, a state-of-the-art athletic facility that is literally more like a med spa than a collegiate training facility. With a collective five percent body fat, these athletes all mingle and date and intimidate the rest of the student body.
The super fucking rich kids: Every school has rich kids, obvi. But at USC, you get the rich kids from Hollywoods elite and Silicon Valley. There is no shortage of Louis Vuitton-carrying, Range Rover-driving betches around campus. And many of these betches have private planes, too, which is like a super casual way to get to Vegas for a weekend. And since its only four hours away by car (30 minutes by jet), even the non-elite rich kids love going to Vegas and spending thousands on bottle service at a club watching Calvin Harris fantasize about Taylor Swift onstage.
Everyone else: USC is a super fucking diverse school. For a decade, it had more international students than any other collegerecently beat out by NYUand also boasts a 40 percent out-of-state rate. Its a private school with a rich alumni base, so scholarships and generous financial aid packages are a regular occurrence. But if youre paying full tuition, youre paying a lot of fucking money: roughly $70,000 in cost of attendance per year. So you better be ready to study alongside your partying, or your ass is going back to Santa Monica Community College.
Famous alumni: Even though they dont actually go to USC currently, theyre notable enough to make this list. Will Ferrell is infamous in USC folklore for flooding the basement of his fraternity at USC and making pledges row him around in a rowboat (and then yelling Mayday as he sent the pledges into the water). Sophia Bush went there. All of the Schwarzenneger kids have graduated from thereat least the legitimate ones. The guy who created the Star Wars saga, George Lucas, went there. So, yeah the alumni are kind of sick.
Where to live
Freshmen: New. North. Though the USC administration is again trying to ruin the lives of all USC students (something about academic integrity and climibing the rankings and other bullshit), the New/North dorms are still the place to be. Two dorms merged togetherNew and Northits basically a year-long party. And its completely common to wake up to a very angry email on Monday mornings from the RAs complaining about couches from the dorms being thrown out the windows, again. Dont ask. But just be prepared to pay extensive damages as an entire dorm, mostly because drunk frat boys come home and throw shit down the hallways.
Everyone else: Sophomores get merged into the upperclassmen category after freshman year. USC typically only has room for freshmen on campus, so everyone else moves off campus. Those who are Greek will likely move into their sorority and fraternity houses, and all the other fun people will move into the New Mansion, West 27th, or Gateway apartment buildings. Rent is high everywhere because its fucking Los Angeles, even if it is in the middle of south central.
What to do
Football gamedays are literally a weekly holiday at USC. Get ready to wake the fuck up to the fight song being blared through your sorority house as betches sneak mimosas into the supposed-to-be-dry house. Then, its a day full of beer pong, keg stands, and dancing on tables at frat houses as you prepare to get your heart broken by USC football. You can literally walk down Troustale Parkway (the center street on campus) chugging out of a plastic vodka bottle. No one cares or will give you a ticket.
The football team has a super proud tradition of success and national championships and Heisman winners and all of that fun stuff, but theyve kind of shit the bed recently after a certain ex-boyfriend of Kim KardashianReggie Bushgot caught illegally taking money. Whatever. It also has a super proud tradition of really fucking hot quarterbacksMark Sanchez, Matt Leinart, Matt Barkley, just to name a fewso that makes all games worth it.
The other six days of the week, youll never be bored at USC. I mean, youre in fucking Los Angeles. You can literally uber one mile to watch the Lakers play at Staples Center, or ride your bike to campus to watch James Franco get high and teach his class at the cinema school. Between classes, which are actually hard because its one of the best academic schools in the country, most students hang out at the campus center and spend $15 for a salad and a pizza from California Pizza Kitchen. Basically all students have bikes or longboards at USC, and most students see these bikes and longboards get stolen fairly regularly. Just a hazard of living in South Central Los Angeles. The campus is fenced in for a reason.
Where to drink
There are two options at USC: the row, and the 9-0. There is literally one bar on USCs campus, and the 901 Bar and Grill is that bar. Its a lovable dive. It smells like shit. Theres always a line out the door Thursday-Sunday. All drinks are $11. If you have too many Mind Erasers or AMFs, you will sleep through all of your classes the next day. As a freshman, you sneak in using your bigs ID. As a senior, you use your own ID and wear sweatpants because youre a #SWUG.
When the administration isnt ruining your party life on the row, you head to whatever mixer is being held on a Monday night at your favorite fraternity, and go drink on a Monday, because collegiates are functioning alcoholics. Duh.
Where to travel
Los Angeles is an international hub. And with the frequency of private planes around (were seriously not joking), you have every opportunity to travel. Lots of Trojans go abroad the second semester of junior year, basically anywhere in Europe.
Otherwise, the biggest travel weekend of the year is The Weekenderwhen USC football plays Cal-Berkeley or Stanford, and the entire school gets on a plane to go be arrogant and obnoxious football fans up in San Francisco.
In the spring, get your favorite wannabe-hippie outfit prepared months in advance and go to Coachella. Or if youre a country fan, go and throw on some cowboy boots, make out with a 30-year-old cowboy, and fantasize about Luke Bryan at Stagecoach.
Spring break
Cabo San fucking Lucas. Try not to lose all of your money at the Mango Deck or El Squid Roe. Youll spend your days collecting Cabo San Lucas headbands and posing for Instagrams and drinking way too much tequila, so its heaven.
Drawbacks
People in LA get a reputation for sucking, which is a completely earned reputation. The campus is in a sketchy area. People have gotten murdered and mugged in recent years. Parking sucks. Tuition is expensive.
But other than that, its the best fucking school in the world. Fight on, betches.
div.body_middle_part_right .bodypart:nth-child(n+2),a.prevBody{display:none;}
source http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/08/betches-love-this-college-university-of-southern-california/ from All of Beer http://allofbeer.blogspot.com/2017/09/betches-love-this-college-university-of.html
0 notes
samanthasroberts · 7 years ago
Text
Betches Love This College: University of Southern California
The land of beautiful people, beautiful weather, and a beautiful fucking campus, the University of Southern California is probs the most collectively beautiful school in the country. And if you dont believe that sweeping generalization, which you obvi should, trust the movies. USCs movie-like campus has been featured in , , (2, ugh), and was even Harvard in . What, like its hard?
In the heart of Los Angeles, its no surprise that USC is in a shit ton of movies and TV shows. Its also no surprise that USC is on the top of thousands of graduating seniors wish lists every year. A weirdly perfect mix of academics and partying, USC is the place that all the pretty, popular, and annoyingly smart kids from your high school wanted to go (or actually went if they could afford it).
The People
Greeks: Even though the USC administration has really fucked up with the Greek system in recent years, rushing a fraternity and joining a sorority are def the pinnacle moments of freshman year. And once you go Greek, you never go back (even if your fraternity is kicked off the row, looking at you SAE). After a record number of freshmen hospitalizations due to alcohol poisoning on the row this decade, the administration started freaking the fuck out and made the row dry. Right. Well, Los Angeles is in a fucking drought, President Nikias. Banning alcohol is not only inhumane, its fucking immoral for the environment.
USC is honestly too big of a school to claim that everyone goes Greek. But everyone you want to know is Greek, and every great party is Greek. So like, you decide.
GDIs: …but dont even get the God Damn Independents (GDIs) started on the assholes in the Greek system. Theres a super divisive shift between the non-Greeks and the Greeks, especially at the start of freshman year. Super eager freshmen girls obvi need to wear their American Apparel sorority tanks to class every day of syllabus week. Bros make it known that theyre in a fraternity with their hazing ritualsseriously, Sigma Chi? Not letting your pledges talk for the first week of classes? Fucking weird. And the geeds watch this all with amazed, nerdy, and judgmental looks. Which tbh, the judgment kind of makes sense, seeing as one fraternity manages to spend over $50,000 in one night on its Frost party every year. And that budget doesnt even count the money that its fraternity members spend on snow in the form of nose candy. So to GDIs, fraternity and sorority assholes are the worst. Got it.
Athletes: If youre an athlete at USC, youre probably from California, and youre probably the best of the best. And if you play water polo, volleyball or beach volleyball, youre probably going to win a national championship. Or maybe youll go to the Olympics one year, because USC has had more Olympians than any other school. So casual.
The athletes all hang out in the same area of campusthe John McKay center, a state-of-the-art athletic facility that is literally more like a med spa than a collegiate training facility. With a collective five percent body fat, these athletes all mingle and date and intimidate the rest of the student body.
The super fucking rich kids: Every school has rich kids, obvi. But at USC, you get the rich kids from Hollywoods elite and Silicon Valley. There is no shortage of Louis Vuitton-carrying, Range Rover-driving betches around campus. And many of these betches have private planes, too, which is like a super casual way to get to Vegas for a weekend. And since its only four hours away by car (30 minutes by jet), even the non-elite rich kids love going to Vegas and spending thousands on bottle service at a club watching Calvin Harris fantasize about Taylor Swift onstage.
Everyone else: USC is a super fucking diverse school. For a decade, it had more international students than any other collegerecently beat out by NYUand also boasts a 40 percent out-of-state rate. Its a private school with a rich alumni base, so scholarships and generous financial aid packages are a regular occurrence. But if youre paying full tuition, youre paying a lot of fucking money: roughly $70,000 in cost of attendance per year. So you better be ready to study alongside your partying, or your ass is going back to Santa Monica Community College.
Famous alumni: Even though they dont actually go to USC currently, theyre notable enough to make this list. Will Ferrell is infamous in USC folklore for flooding the basement of his fraternity at USC and making pledges row him around in a rowboat (and then yelling Mayday as he sent the pledges into the water). Sophia Bush went there. All of the Schwarzenneger kids have graduated from thereat least the legitimate ones. The guy who created the Star Wars saga, George Lucas, went there. So, yeah the alumni are kind of sick.
Where to live
Freshmen: New. North. Though the USC administration is again trying to ruin the lives of all USC students (something about academic integrity and climibing the rankings and other bullshit), the New/North dorms are still the place to be. Two dorms merged togetherNew and Northits basically a year-long party. And its completely common to wake up to a very angry email on Monday mornings from the RAs complaining about couches from the dorms being thrown out the windows, again. Dont ask. But just be prepared to pay extensive damages as an entire dorm, mostly because drunk frat boys come home and throw shit down the hallways.
Everyone else: Sophomores get merged into the upperclassmen category after freshman year. USC typically only has room for freshmen on campus, so everyone else moves off campus. Those who are Greek will likely move into their sorority and fraternity houses, and all the other fun people will move into the New Mansion, West 27th, or Gateway apartment buildings. Rent is high everywhere because its fucking Los Angeles, even if it is in the middle of south central.
What to do
Football gamedays are literally a weekly holiday at USC. Get ready to wake the fuck up to the fight song being blared through your sorority house as betches sneak mimosas into the supposed-to-be-dry house. Then, its a day full of beer pong, keg stands, and dancing on tables at frat houses as you prepare to get your heart broken by USC football. You can literally walk down Troustale Parkway (the center street on campus) chugging out of a plastic vodka bottle. No one cares or will give you a ticket.
The football team has a super proud tradition of success and national championships and Heisman winners and all of that fun stuff, but theyve kind of shit the bed recently after a certain ex-boyfriend of Kim KardashianReggie Bushgot caught illegally taking money. Whatever. It also has a super proud tradition of really fucking hot quarterbacksMark Sanchez, Matt Leinart, Matt Barkley, just to name a fewso that makes all games worth it.
The other six days of the week, youll never be bored at USC. I mean, youre in fucking Los Angeles. You can literally uber one mile to watch the Lakers play at Staples Center, or ride your bike to campus to watch James Franco get high and teach his class at the cinema school. Between classes, which are actually hard because its one of the best academic schools in the country, most students hang out at the campus center and spend $15 for a salad and a pizza from California Pizza Kitchen. Basically all students have bikes or longboards at USC, and most students see these bikes and longboards get stolen fairly regularly. Just a hazard of living in South Central Los Angeles. The campus is fenced in for a reason.
Where to drink
There are two options at USC: the row, and the 9-0. There is literally one bar on USCs campus, and the 901 Bar and Grill is that bar. Its a lovable dive. It smells like shit. Theres always a line out the door Thursday-Sunday. All drinks are $11. If you have too many Mind Erasers or AMFs, you will sleep through all of your classes the next day. As a freshman, you sneak in using your bigs ID. As a senior, you use your own ID and wear sweatpants because youre a #SWUG.
When the administration isnt ruining your party life on the row, you head to whatever mixer is being held on a Monday night at your favorite fraternity, and go drink on a Monday, because collegiates are functioning alcoholics. Duh.
Where to travel
Los Angeles is an international hub. And with the frequency of private planes around (were seriously not joking), you have every opportunity to travel. Lots of Trojans go abroad the second semester of junior year, basically anywhere in Europe.
Otherwise, the biggest travel weekend of the year is The Weekenderwhen USC football plays Cal-Berkeley or Stanford, and the entire school gets on a plane to go be arrogant and obnoxious football fans up in San Francisco.
In the spring, get your favorite wannabe-hippie outfit prepared months in advance and go to Coachella. Or if youre a country fan, go and throw on some cowboy boots, make out with a 30-year-old cowboy, and fantasize about Luke Bryan at Stagecoach.
Spring break
Cabo San fucking Lucas. Try not to lose all of your money at the Mango Deck or El Squid Roe. Youll spend your days collecting Cabo San Lucas headbands and posing for Instagrams and drinking way too much tequila, so its heaven.
Drawbacks
People in LA get a reputation for sucking, which is a completely earned reputation. The campus is in a sketchy area. People have gotten murdered and mugged in recent years. Parking sucks. Tuition is expensive.
But other than that, its the best fucking school in the world. Fight on, betches.
div.body_middle_part_right .bodypart:nth-child(n+2),a.prevBody{display:none;}
Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/08/betches-love-this-college-university-of-southern-california/
from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/09/08/betches-love-this-college-university-of-southern-california/
0 notes
adambstingus · 7 years ago
Text
Betches Love This College: University of Southern California
The land of beautiful people, beautiful weather, and a beautiful fucking campus, the University of Southern California is probs the most collectively beautiful school in the country. And if you dont believe that sweeping generalization, which you obvi should, trust the movies. USCs movie-like campus has been featured in , , (2, ugh), and was even Harvard in . What, like its hard?
In the heart of Los Angeles, its no surprise that USC is in a shit ton of movies and TV shows. Its also no surprise that USC is on the top of thousands of graduating seniors wish lists every year. A weirdly perfect mix of academics and partying, USC is the place that all the pretty, popular, and annoyingly smart kids from your high school wanted to go (or actually went if they could afford it).
The People
Greeks: Even though the USC administration has really fucked up with the Greek system in recent years, rushing a fraternity and joining a sorority are def the pinnacle moments of freshman year. And once you go Greek, you never go back (even if your fraternity is kicked off the row, looking at you SAE). After a record number of freshmen hospitalizations due to alcohol poisoning on the row this decade, the administration started freaking the fuck out and made the row dry. Right. Well, Los Angeles is in a fucking drought, President Nikias. Banning alcohol is not only inhumane, its fucking immoral for the environment.
USC is honestly too big of a school to claim that everyone goes Greek. But everyone you want to know is Greek, and every great party is Greek. So like, you decide.
GDIs: …but dont even get the God Damn Independents (GDIs) started on the assholes in the Greek system. Theres a super divisive shift between the non-Greeks and the Greeks, especially at the start of freshman year. Super eager freshmen girls obvi need to wear their American Apparel sorority tanks to class every day of syllabus week. Bros make it known that theyre in a fraternity with their hazing ritualsseriously, Sigma Chi? Not letting your pledges talk for the first week of classes? Fucking weird. And the geeds watch this all with amazed, nerdy, and judgmental looks. Which tbh, the judgment kind of makes sense, seeing as one fraternity manages to spend over $50,000 in one night on its Frost party every year. And that budget doesnt even count the money that its fraternity members spend on snow in the form of nose candy. So to GDIs, fraternity and sorority assholes are the worst. Got it.
Athletes: If youre an athlete at USC, youre probably from California, and youre probably the best of the best. And if you play water polo, volleyball or beach volleyball, youre probably going to win a national championship. Or maybe youll go to the Olympics one year, because USC has had more Olympians than any other school. So casual.
The athletes all hang out in the same area of campusthe John McKay center, a state-of-the-art athletic facility that is literally more like a med spa than a collegiate training facility. With a collective five percent body fat, these athletes all mingle and date and intimidate the rest of the student body.
The super fucking rich kids: Every school has rich kids, obvi. But at USC, you get the rich kids from Hollywoods elite and Silicon Valley. There is no shortage of Louis Vuitton-carrying, Range Rover-driving betches around campus. And many of these betches have private planes, too, which is like a super casual way to get to Vegas for a weekend. And since its only four hours away by car (30 minutes by jet), even the non-elite rich kids love going to Vegas and spending thousands on bottle service at a club watching Calvin Harris fantasize about Taylor Swift onstage.
Everyone else: USC is a super fucking diverse school. For a decade, it had more international students than any other collegerecently beat out by NYUand also boasts a 40 percent out-of-state rate. Its a private school with a rich alumni base, so scholarships and generous financial aid packages are a regular occurrence. But if youre paying full tuition, youre paying a lot of fucking money: roughly $70,000 in cost of attendance per year. So you better be ready to study alongside your partying, or your ass is going back to Santa Monica Community College.
Famous alumni: Even though they dont actually go to USC currently, theyre notable enough to make this list. Will Ferrell is infamous in USC folklore for flooding the basement of his fraternity at USC and making pledges row him around in a rowboat (and then yelling Mayday as he sent the pledges into the water). Sophia Bush went there. All of the Schwarzenneger kids have graduated from thereat least the legitimate ones. The guy who created the Star Wars saga, George Lucas, went there. So, yeah the alumni are kind of sick.
Where to live
Freshmen: New. North. Though the USC administration is again trying to ruin the lives of all USC students (something about academic integrity and climibing the rankings and other bullshit), the New/North dorms are still the place to be. Two dorms merged togetherNew and Northits basically a year-long party. And its completely common to wake up to a very angry email on Monday mornings from the RAs complaining about couches from the dorms being thrown out the windows, again. Dont ask. But just be prepared to pay extensive damages as an entire dorm, mostly because drunk frat boys come home and throw shit down the hallways.
Everyone else: Sophomores get merged into the upperclassmen category after freshman year. USC typically only has room for freshmen on campus, so everyone else moves off campus. Those who are Greek will likely move into their sorority and fraternity houses, and all the other fun people will move into the New Mansion, West 27th, or Gateway apartment buildings. Rent is high everywhere because its fucking Los Angeles, even if it is in the middle of south central.
What to do
Football gamedays are literally a weekly holiday at USC. Get ready to wake the fuck up to the fight song being blared through your sorority house as betches sneak mimosas into the supposed-to-be-dry house. Then, its a day full of beer pong, keg stands, and dancing on tables at frat houses as you prepare to get your heart broken by USC football. You can literally walk down Troustale Parkway (the center street on campus) chugging out of a plastic vodka bottle. No one cares or will give you a ticket.
The football team has a super proud tradition of success and national championships and Heisman winners and all of that fun stuff, but theyve kind of shit the bed recently after a certain ex-boyfriend of Kim KardashianReggie Bushgot caught illegally taking money. Whatever. It also has a super proud tradition of really fucking hot quarterbacksMark Sanchez, Matt Leinart, Matt Barkley, just to name a fewso that makes all games worth it.
The other six days of the week, youll never be bored at USC. I mean, youre in fucking Los Angeles. You can literally uber one mile to watch the Lakers play at Staples Center, or ride your bike to campus to watch James Franco get high and teach his class at the cinema school. Between classes, which are actually hard because its one of the best academic schools in the country, most students hang out at the campus center and spend $15 for a salad and a pizza from California Pizza Kitchen. Basically all students have bikes or longboards at USC, and most students see these bikes and longboards get stolen fairly regularly. Just a hazard of living in South Central Los Angeles. The campus is fenced in for a reason.
Where to drink
There are two options at USC: the row, and the 9-0. There is literally one bar on USCs campus, and the 901 Bar and Grill is that bar. Its a lovable dive. It smells like shit. Theres always a line out the door Thursday-Sunday. All drinks are $11. If you have too many Mind Erasers or AMFs, you will sleep through all of your classes the next day. As a freshman, you sneak in using your bigs ID. As a senior, you use your own ID and wear sweatpants because youre a #SWUG.
When the administration isnt ruining your party life on the row, you head to whatever mixer is being held on a Monday night at your favorite fraternity, and go drink on a Monday, because collegiates are functioning alcoholics. Duh.
Where to travel
Los Angeles is an international hub. And with the frequency of private planes around (were seriously not joking), you have every opportunity to travel. Lots of Trojans go abroad the second semester of junior year, basically anywhere in Europe.
Otherwise, the biggest travel weekend of the year is The Weekenderwhen USC football plays Cal-Berkeley or Stanford, and the entire school gets on a plane to go be arrogant and obnoxious football fans up in San Francisco.
In the spring, get your favorite wannabe-hippie outfit prepared months in advance and go to Coachella. Or if youre a country fan, go and throw on some cowboy boots, make out with a 30-year-old cowboy, and fantasize about Luke Bryan at Stagecoach.
Spring break
Cabo San fucking Lucas. Try not to lose all of your money at the Mango Deck or El Squid Roe. Youll spend your days collecting Cabo San Lucas headbands and posing for Instagrams and drinking way too much tequila, so its heaven.
Drawbacks
People in LA get a reputation for sucking, which is a completely earned reputation. The campus is in a sketchy area. People have gotten murdered and mugged in recent years. Parking sucks. Tuition is expensive.
But other than that, its the best fucking school in the world. Fight on, betches.
div.body_middle_part_right .bodypart:nth-child(n+2),a.prevBody{display:none;}
from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/08/betches-love-this-college-university-of-southern-california/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/165103093982
0 notes
allofbeercom · 7 years ago
Text
Betches Love This College: University of Southern California
The land of beautiful people, beautiful weather, and a beautiful fucking campus, the University of Southern California is probs the most collectively beautiful school in the country. And if you dont believe that sweeping generalization, which you obvi should, trust the movies. USCs movie-like campus has been featured in , , (2, ugh), and was even Harvard in . What, like its hard?
In the heart of Los Angeles, its no surprise that USC is in a shit ton of movies and TV shows. Its also no surprise that USC is on the top of thousands of graduating seniors wish lists every year. A weirdly perfect mix of academics and partying, USC is the place that all the pretty, popular, and annoyingly smart kids from your high school wanted to go (or actually went if they could afford it).
The People
Greeks: Even though the USC administration has really fucked up with the Greek system in recent years, rushing a fraternity and joining a sorority are def the pinnacle moments of freshman year. And once you go Greek, you never go back (even if your fraternity is kicked off the row, looking at you SAE). After a record number of freshmen hospitalizations due to alcohol poisoning on the row this decade, the administration started freaking the fuck out and made the row dry. Right. Well, Los Angeles is in a fucking drought, President Nikias. Banning alcohol is not only inhumane, its fucking immoral for the environment.
USC is honestly too big of a school to claim that everyone goes Greek. But everyone you want to know is Greek, and every great party is Greek. So like, you decide.
GDIs: …but dont even get the God Damn Independents (GDIs) started on the assholes in the Greek system. Theres a super divisive shift between the non-Greeks and the Greeks, especially at the start of freshman year. Super eager freshmen girls obvi need to wear their American Apparel sorority tanks to class every day of syllabus week. Bros make it known that theyre in a fraternity with their hazing ritualsseriously, Sigma Chi? Not letting your pledges talk for the first week of classes? Fucking weird. And the geeds watch this all with amazed, nerdy, and judgmental looks. Which tbh, the judgment kind of makes sense, seeing as one fraternity manages to spend over $50,000 in one night on its Frost party every year. And that budget doesnt even count the money that its fraternity members spend on snow in the form of nose candy. So to GDIs, fraternity and sorority assholes are the worst. Got it.
Athletes: If youre an athlete at USC, youre probably from California, and youre probably the best of the best. And if you play water polo, volleyball or beach volleyball, youre probably going to win a national championship. Or maybe youll go to the Olympics one year, because USC has had more Olympians than any other school. So casual.
The athletes all hang out in the same area of campusthe John McKay center, a state-of-the-art athletic facility that is literally more like a med spa than a collegiate training facility. With a collective five percent body fat, these athletes all mingle and date and intimidate the rest of the student body.
The super fucking rich kids: Every school has rich kids, obvi. But at USC, you get the rich kids from Hollywoods elite and Silicon Valley. There is no shortage of Louis Vuitton-carrying, Range Rover-driving betches around campus. And many of these betches have private planes, too, which is like a super casual way to get to Vegas for a weekend. And since its only four hours away by car (30 minutes by jet), even the non-elite rich kids love going to Vegas and spending thousands on bottle service at a club watching Calvin Harris fantasize about Taylor Swift onstage.
Everyone else: USC is a super fucking diverse school. For a decade, it had more international students than any other collegerecently beat out by NYUand also boasts a 40 percent out-of-state rate. Its a private school with a rich alumni base, so scholarships and generous financial aid packages are a regular occurrence. But if youre paying full tuition, youre paying a lot of fucking money: roughly $70,000 in cost of attendance per year. So you better be ready to study alongside your partying, or your ass is going back to Santa Monica Community College.
Famous alumni: Even though they dont actually go to USC currently, theyre notable enough to make this list. Will Ferrell is infamous in USC folklore for flooding the basement of his fraternity at USC and making pledges row him around in a rowboat (and then yelling Mayday as he sent the pledges into the water). Sophia Bush went there. All of the Schwarzenneger kids have graduated from thereat least the legitimate ones. The guy who created the Star Wars saga, George Lucas, went there. So, yeah the alumni are kind of sick.
Where to live
Freshmen: New. North. Though the USC administration is again trying to ruin the lives of all USC students (something about academic integrity and climibing the rankings and other bullshit), the New/North dorms are still the place to be. Two dorms merged togetherNew and Northits basically a year-long party. And its completely common to wake up to a very angry email on Monday mornings from the RAs complaining about couches from the dorms being thrown out the windows, again. Dont ask. But just be prepared to pay extensive damages as an entire dorm, mostly because drunk frat boys come home and throw shit down the hallways.
Everyone else: Sophomores get merged into the upperclassmen category after freshman year. USC typically only has room for freshmen on campus, so everyone else moves off campus. Those who are Greek will likely move into their sorority and fraternity houses, and all the other fun people will move into the New Mansion, West 27th, or Gateway apartment buildings. Rent is high everywhere because its fucking Los Angeles, even if it is in the middle of south central.
What to do
Football gamedays are literally a weekly holiday at USC. Get ready to wake the fuck up to the fight song being blared through your sorority house as betches sneak mimosas into the supposed-to-be-dry house. Then, its a day full of beer pong, keg stands, and dancing on tables at frat houses as you prepare to get your heart broken by USC football. You can literally walk down Troustale Parkway (the center street on campus) chugging out of a plastic vodka bottle. No one cares or will give you a ticket.
The football team has a super proud tradition of success and national championships and Heisman winners and all of that fun stuff, but theyve kind of shit the bed recently after a certain ex-boyfriend of Kim KardashianReggie Bushgot caught illegally taking money. Whatever. It also has a super proud tradition of really fucking hot quarterbacksMark Sanchez, Matt Leinart, Matt Barkley, just to name a fewso that makes all games worth it.
The other six days of the week, youll never be bored at USC. I mean, youre in fucking Los Angeles. You can literally uber one mile to watch the Lakers play at Staples Center, or ride your bike to campus to watch James Franco get high and teach his class at the cinema school. Between classes, which are actually hard because its one of the best academic schools in the country, most students hang out at the campus center and spend $15 for a salad and a pizza from California Pizza Kitchen. Basically all students have bikes or longboards at USC, and most students see these bikes and longboards get stolen fairly regularly. Just a hazard of living in South Central Los Angeles. The campus is fenced in for a reason.
Where to drink
There are two options at USC: the row, and the 9-0. There is literally one bar on USCs campus, and the 901 Bar and Grill is that bar. Its a lovable dive. It smells like shit. Theres always a line out the door Thursday-Sunday. All drinks are $11. If you have too many Mind Erasers or AMFs, you will sleep through all of your classes the next day. As a freshman, you sneak in using your bigs ID. As a senior, you use your own ID and wear sweatpants because youre a #SWUG.
When the administration isnt ruining your party life on the row, you head to whatever mixer is being held on a Monday night at your favorite fraternity, and go drink on a Monday, because collegiates are functioning alcoholics. Duh.
Where to travel
Los Angeles is an international hub. And with the frequency of private planes around (were seriously not joking), you have every opportunity to travel. Lots of Trojans go abroad the second semester of junior year, basically anywhere in Europe.
Otherwise, the biggest travel weekend of the year is The Weekenderwhen USC football plays Cal-Berkeley or Stanford, and the entire school gets on a plane to go be arrogant and obnoxious football fans up in San Francisco.
In the spring, get your favorite wannabe-hippie outfit prepared months in advance and go to Coachella. Or if youre a country fan, go and throw on some cowboy boots, make out with a 30-year-old cowboy, and fantasize about Luke Bryan at Stagecoach.
Spring break
Cabo San fucking Lucas. Try not to lose all of your money at the Mango Deck or El Squid Roe. Youll spend your days collecting Cabo San Lucas headbands and posing for Instagrams and drinking way too much tequila, so its heaven.
Drawbacks
People in LA get a reputation for sucking, which is a completely earned reputation. The campus is in a sketchy area. People have gotten murdered and mugged in recent years. Parking sucks. Tuition is expensive.
But other than that, its the best fucking school in the world. Fight on, betches.
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from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/08/betches-love-this-college-university-of-southern-california/
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