#“it's my name.” but he still lets alex stab it........................i miss when my life had meaning

[rpfisfine]

eroticism of surgery tumblr motif but it’s just two men opening a package

[niemernuet]

since i can't decide what kind of kiss i want you to write about and i miss your writing way too much to be the one setting high bars, i'm just gonna request one of your choice for either ginodi and/or mauro&justin (there's still no ship name for them or did i miss it?) if that's fine for you😚💝

Thank you soo much 💕💕💕 and sorry for this awful delay (story of my life 😩). I could not decide so I had to do one drabble for each.

Prompt: Send me a Ship and a Number and I will Write a Kiss

Nr. 13: ...discretely pairing: Justin/Mauro (also still blanking on a portmanteau...) characters: Justin Murisier, Mauro Caviezel, Gino Caviezel, Marco Odermatt, Alex Fiva, Romain Détraz

The small group was in a secluded corner of the spacious foyer, their backs shielding most of what was happening around the small table. Most people did not mind them anyway as they were mingling around the bar, and enjoying the complementary drinks Swiss Ski had bribed them with to dress up today. Justin joined the men quietly by sidling up to Mauro. He was busy filming with his phone but still managed to put his free arm around his boyfriend.

“Wow,” he said softly.

Justin wrapped his arm around his chest, and grinned up at him. “Right?”

“I am in awe,” Mauro confessed, and gave him a quick, discrete kiss.

“I told you I can pull it off.”

“And how you can. Tell Daniel he has great taste.”

He kept smiling while Justin sucked in air. "That is outrageous!" he hissed. "You don't think I can dress well on my own!"

"That is not what I'm saying," Mauro protested. "I'm sure you dressed yourself all on your own. All I'm saying is that I know for a fact you don't own a tuxedo."

"Well, I'll have you know this is not Daniel's," Justin huffed.

"Then I apologise," Mauro answered, still smiling, and pressed a kiss in Justin's hair.

"How could I borrow it when he's here too? It's his brother's."

Mauro snorted as Justin winked at him, then he put his head against his shoulder to take in the scene playing on the other side of the small table. Gino looked more frazzled by the minute, and impatiently he pressed the button on his phone for another rewatch of the step-by-step tutorial about how to knot a tie. Marco looked on equally helpless while Alex and Romain, both sitting down to give their injured knees some rest, simply enjoyed the front row seats.

"I feel conflicted," Justin confessed after watching the spectacle for a while.

Mauro shortly let go of him to adjust the zoom of the camera before putting his arm around him again. "And why is that?"

"I'm afraid you're not really your usual, sensible self when it comes to your younger brother. I mean, someone should tell you to stop filming. Maybe appeal to your conscience, make you help him."

"You want me to stop filming?"

"Absolutely not, this is fucking hilarious."

Mauro smiled. "Thought so."

"Why is the bottom part longer now?" Gino exclaimed in frustration, and threw his hands up. "I did everything like in the video! This shit sucks, I'm just going without a tie."

"Come on, now, don't give up!" Alex laughed. "You're almost there. Here, I'll show you." He beckoned Gino to stoop down, and opened the tie again.

"See?" Mauro softly said to Justin. "He has help."

"No thanks to you!" Gino spat. "And I told you to stop filming!"

Justin and Mauro giggled, and Marco pre-emptively put his hand on Gino's shoulder.

____________________________ ____________________________

Nr. 17: …to distract pairing: Ginodi characters: Marco Odermatt, Gino Caviezel, Thomi Tumler, Loïc Meillard, Mauro Caviezel, Justin Murisier

"I did this last in Home Economics when I was 14," Thomi moaned, and looked over the ingredients scattered across the kitchen table and counter. "There's a reason why Svenja never lets me help when we have guests over. Couldn't you have asked Loïc?"

"Absolutely not!" Marco muttered between clenched teeth, and poked his tablet so hard as if he wanted to stab through it with his finger. "I've got enough of him when I'm cooking in the training camps. I can already hear him. I see your mistake. You bought chocolate chips from the supermarket instead of the Peruvian organic dark chocolate from this one shop in Martigny. Also your butter does not have the right temperature, and your whisking-technique is abysmal. Just let me do it, before you ruin it further."

Thomi grabbed the packet of butter, and turned it in his hand. "What temperature is butter supposed to have anyway?"

"I'm sure it doesn't matter," Marco said, and leant the tablet against the window sill. "According to Betty Bossi this is the best chocolate muffin recipe in the world. We have about two hours, so we better get going. First, we have to preheat the oven."

He knelt down in front of the oven, and eyed the dials. “Maybe I should have baked them at home,” he muttered, and turned at the various knobs until the oven awoke with a soft murmur.

“I think this might be quite easy after all,” Thomi said as he read over the recipe. “We only have to melt the butter, mix it with the eggs, mix in the dry stuff, and pop it in the oven. Sounds easy.”

“That’s what I say,” Marco answered, and stood up again. “Okay, can you melt the butter in the microwave? I’ll crack the eggs and measure he rest.”

“Easy,” Thomi said, as if to encourage himself, and grabbed the kitchen scales. While Marco cracked one egg after the other into the bowl of the food processor, and painstakingly fished out all the shells that had fallen in, Thomi opened all the drawers until he found the one with the bowls. Once the butter was slowly irradiated in the microwave, he turned around.

“What are these anyway?” he asked, and wanted to grab the stack of photos laying on the counter.

“Don’t touch them with your greasy paws!” Marco said sharply, and Thomi pulled his hand back. “It’s for the decoration. Don’t you ruin it!”

Thomi frowned. “But it’s just pictures of Gino?”

“Exactly, because it is Gino’s birthday,” Marco answered slowly, and checked the scales as he spooned chocolate powder out of a bag into another bowl.

Before Thomi could retort anything, a loud bang made them both flinch. Brown powder flew through the air, and settled as fine dust on the counter and the floor.

“Shit shit shit,” Thomi swore, and hastily yanked the door of the microwave open. He coughed, and waved away the cloud of steam pouring out.

“There’s a bit less butter in the bowl…,” he said, and hissed as he pulled it out, “because there’s now some on the walls in there…is that bad?”

Marco sighed, and wiped the chocolate powder from the counter. “I’ll clean it later,” he said, “just put it into the eggs!”

With more hissing, Thomi poured the butter into the eggs, and turned on the processor. "It's a bit runny," he said, and hastily turned the machine a few notches slower before the egg-butter-mixture could spill over the edge.

"Duh, the dry stuff is still missing," Marco said, and unceremoniously dumped the flour and the chocolate powder into it. A new cloud flew through the air before it slowly got mixed together with the wet ingredients, and started to form a dark, somewhat grainy mass.

"See?" he asked, grabbed the nearby tray with the dozen dents, and started to put muffin paper inside.

Carefully, with his tongue between his teeth, Thomi began to spoon the mixture into the tray. "When are they coming back?"

"Mauro says they're going for a few rounds of paddle," Marco explained. "Which means about two hours before Justin gets bored, plus travel and changing etcetera, which leaves us about one and a half hours to bake and clean." He shoved the tray into the oven, and wiped his hands on a towel before he grabbed the stack of photos.

Thomi followed him to the table, and grabbed the pair of scissors Marco held out to him. "And this is…"

"The decoration," Marco finished, and began to cut out Gino's head from the photo, grabbed a bottle of glue, and glued it to an old popsicle stick. "See? Once the muffins are done, we can put them in." His smile faltered when he saw Thomi's quizzical look.

"You're such a romantic," he cooed.

Marco's cheeks blushed furiously, and hastily he grabbed another photo. "Shut up and help me!" he muttered.

Silently they worked until a row of Gino-sticks lay before them on the table. Thomi grabbed one of the last photos when he suddenly paused, and sniffed the air.

"Did you set the timer for the muffins?" he asked.

"Oh shit!" Marco shrieked, and hurried to the oven. An unsettlingly dark cloud wafted out of it when he opened the door.

"No no no!" he whimpered, and grabbed a pair of towels. "This can't be happening!"

Thomi joined him, and together they inspected the sad result of their work.

"They're kinda…flat?" Thomi said. "The ones in the pictures seem bigger. Maybe we didn't put in enough?"

"We did everything as instructed!" Marco exclaimed. "Fuck!" He slumped over the counter, and buried his head in his arms.

"We still have enough ingredients for another batch," Thomi said, and patted his back.

Marco's voice was muffled by his arms when he spoke. "And? We'll just fail again. This was a shit idea. Gino deserves so much better than this. I should have ordered them."

"No no!" Thomi interrupted him. "Don't give up now! Come, I know someone who can help us."

Marco shot up, and glared at him. "No! Absolutely not!" he said but Thomi already had his phone in his hand. "I told you I don't want…"

"Hi, Loïc, it's Thomi here," Thomi began, and grinned at Marco. "Can you spare five minutes for Marco and me? We need your help."

Marco kept glaring at Thomi even as he put the call on video, and began to explain their predicament to Loïc who was sitting on top of his surfboard on a lawn, dripping wet and in swim shorts. He listened intently, and nodded from time to time.

"I think I understand where you went wrong," he began eventually. "The several times you went wrong, I mean."

Thomi smiled at his phone while Marco's glare was still aimed squarely at him.

"The biggest reason, other than forgetting the time, is that you didn't beat the eggs enough," Loïc continued. "The baking powder alone is just not enough, you have to get some air in the dough. The best way to do it is to whisk it with a Kitchenaid. What kind of food processor do you have?"

Thomi turned the phone, and Loïc's face scrunched up. "That's just a knockoff," he said with obvious judgement. "Are you in Gino's kitchen?"

"So we have to whisk the eggs longer?" Marco asked.

"Exactly," Loïc answered. "Though probably a lot longer with that machine. My Kitchenaid can do it in a few seconds but this…"

"Okay, thank you," Marco interrupted him, and grabbed the carton of eggs.

"Wait, that's not all!" Loïc said. "You can't just nuke the butter until it's liquid! It has to be soft but still solid, and then you have to whisk it together with the eggs and the sugar until the whole paste is white and fluffy. And you have put in the chocolate chips dead last, really only the minute before you put it in the oven." His eyes wandered over his phone as he took in the ingredients scattered on the counter.

"Milk chocolate chips? Really? Not even dark chocolate?"

"It's what the supermarket had," Marco answered through clenched teeth, and threw Thomi another accusing glare.

"You should have called earlier," Loïc said. "There's this shop in Sion who sells this lovely chocolate from a small manufactory in Colombia that just adds a whole other layer to every cake. You can put it in milk, in coffee, hell, you can even…"

"Can we circle back to the beginning?" Thomi interrupted him. "So, we have to mix the eggs with the soft but not too soft butter?"

"Right!" Loïc said, and waved his hand. "Start by cracking the eggs. I'll watch."

Before long, the smell of delicious cake filled the entire flat, and when they opened the oven for the second time, the muffins came out perfectly. Loïc's somewhat smug smile was the last they saw of him before Thomi ended the call.

"See?" he asked, and grabbed a few of the popsicle-Ginos. "Wasn't so bad, right?"

Marco huffed, and rolled his eyes. His smile fell though when the noise of an engine sounded through the open window.

"No!" he exclaimed. "They're too early! They can't be back yet."

"Don't worry, we're all done," Thomi said, and stuck the last popsicle-stick into a muffin.

"With baking maybe!" Marco hissed, and started to stack the seeming endless amount of bowls together without really making a dent in the mess. "But the kitchen is still in total chaos. We can't let Gino see this!" He shoved the tray with the muffins in Thomi's hands, and pushed him through the door.

"I've set the table in the garden. Put it there, I'll distract him."

He raced through the flat, and reached the door just as it opened.

"Whoa!" It was the only word Gino managed to say before Marco's lips landed on him, and he was pulled in a tight hug. He laughed through their kiss, and his hands wandered over Marco's back.

"Is that part of that elusive surprise I was promised?" he whispered when they both finally had to gasp for air.

"No, that one was just because I missed you," Marco smiled. "Your surprise is in the garden."

Behind them, Justin squeezed past. "Next time you can go play squash with him," he grumbled.

"It was paddle," Gino answered and tried to look after him but gave up quickly when Marco grabbed his head and pulled him in for another kiss. He hummed when Marco softly pushed him backwards through the hallway.

"Get a room you two," Mauro said good-naturedly as he passed them.

"Marco, why…" Gino asked between breathless kisses but could not finish his question.

"Jesus Christ!" Justin yelled. "Did a bomb explode in here?"

Marco's shoulders slumped, and Gino burst out laughing. For a second they stood like that before Gino hugged him again.

"You baked a chocolate cake for me?" he asked, and stroked calming circles over Marco's back.

"Muffins," Marco mumbled in Gino's neck. "So you saw the kitchen?"

"No but you have chocolate chips in your hair, and…" Tenderly, Gino pulled something out of Marco's hair, and inspected it in the dim light of the hallway. "…eggshells."

"I'll clean it all, I promise," Marco said. Gino was still beaming when he pushed Marco softly back, and put his hands on his burning cheeks.

"Don't worry," he assured. "I love it."

"Happy birthday," Marco whispered.

[carnationworld-writings]

Sweet desert rose (Ardeth Bay x fem!reader)

To read my other works, check my MASTERLIST !

Paring: Ardeth Bay x fem!O’Connell!reader

Universe: The Mummy (1999) / The Mummy Returns (2001)

Word Count: 1292

Requested: No, but I couldn't resist writing about this man. My first love...

Warnings: mention about death situations that happened in “The mummy returns”, mention of food, crying, tattoos. The phrase in italic at the end means that Ardeth said it in Arabic. 

If I forgot about anything feel free to write to me. Your wellbeing is important to me!

Summary: The one where their life together started. 

Events in Ahm Shere were traumatic for the lack of a better word. Rick became more overprotective of his wife and son, and nobody could blame him for that. The O'Connells had already planned their journey to London, where they could stay low for a little bit, rest and just be with each other. Jonathan started planning his new incredible business and probably was gambling somewhere. Ardeth Bay was performing his duties as Medjai's chieftain. And it all left the younger sister of Rick O'Connell all alone with the overwhelming guilt she felt in her heart. She still could have heard Alex screaming when he was taken. She remembered how her heart stopped at the sight of the gun near Ardeth's head. Miss O'Connell couldn't forget Evy lying on the sand after she had been stabbed. She remembered her brother's face when he nearly fell into the underground. She remembered the fear she felt when they all stood at the top of the pyramid and when Jonathan nearly fell. It didn't matter that they all were alive and the world was safe again. It didn't stop her from waking in the middle of the night when she couldn't breathe, and tears were running down her cheeks. No matter what, she couldn't stop thinking that she could do something more. That she could prevent all of this from happening. So she tried to keep herself as busy as she could, using every pretext to go out. 

She walked between the stands at the market, wanting to buy some fruits or sweets for Alex. She gladly welcomed such a familiar atmosphere, where the people were talking or arguing about prices or items. She spent much more time than was needed, and her feet hurt when she went back to their place. She was lost in her mind when she heard somebody calling her name. She turned around and felt her heart beating faster at the sight of Ardeth's silhouette. She smiled, waiting for him to catch up with her. 

"Ardeth! It's so good to see you alive." Her smile grew wider when he stood next to her, and she gently touched his arm covered with black material. "What are you doing here? I thought you had a lot of work with tribs." Since they first met in Hamunaptra, she thought he was incredibly handsome. It didn't change when his people pointed guns at them. And it didn't change after these eight years when they talked so little. And the time they spent together on the airship only made her feelings stronger. 

"That is true, but I wanted to see if you are alright. After the battle, I only saw that you all survived." Her heart skipped a beat hearing his accent, and when she realised that worry was written all over his face. 

"We did. And we are good, more or less." She looked down and fixed her hold on the basket she had. "After we separated in the oasis, a lot happened. Too much and too scary to tell in the middle of the street. Especially if you don't want to make me cry." She laughed, trying to cheer up the whole situation. "Come, let's find a quieter place, and we could eat some of these sweets. Rick will kill me if I give it all to Alex."

Ardeth nodded at her, and she just smiled. He took the basket from her, and they started walking to their place. A few times, his hand gently brushed the small of her back, and it made her cheeks blush. They sat at the bench hidden in the Terrace. She took out their favourite sweets, and they started talking. When she started crying, he took her hand between his, squeezing it gently. And the feel of his calloused fingers around hers brought the peace she needed. And they didn't let go of each other's hands for the end of his story.

"When I saw the rest of the Anubis army... I knew that if you didn't win or some miracle happened, we won't make it. And the only thing that I could think of was you. That I'll probably never see you again."

"But you did. We are both alive." She whispered, putting her other hand on the top of his.

"I... I can't imagine my life without you in it." She bit her lower lip, trying to stop the smile that came on her face. 

"You know that one word is enough for me to stay with you." 

"But it would mean leaving your family. And the fife in the tribe will be completely different from the life you had in London." He was looking directly into her eyes, trying to see what she was thinking and feeling right now. 

"I already felt like a third wheel with Rick and Evy. It's time to start my own family. And it's not like we can send letters or meet in Egipt or London once a time. I lived here for so long, and I loved every moment of it. I am sure that with you by my side... It only gets better." She gently touched his tattooed cheek, rubbing it with her thumb. 

"You know that as a chieftain, there is a possibility that I will need to go away often." He squeezed her hand.

"I know. And as long as you will come back to me, I am okay with it. I will somehow find my place among your people. And maybe sometimes I could go with you? After all, I helped to destroy the creature. Twice I would say." 

"Don't forget that you woke him up the first time." Ardeth fought with a smile at her determination.

"It doesn't matter. Imhotep is dead now. And hopefully, he will stay this way. However, I must say that I'm sorry for him. He made it all for love. And at the end, Anck-su-namun just ran away..." She looked away from the moment and closed her eyes. She felt how he gently pushed a strand of her hair away, stopping his hand on the back of her head. When she looked at him, he was smiling.

"You are too good for this world." She couldn't stop her smile, and both of them leaned down at the same time, connecting their lips. Her arms snuck to rest around his broad shoulders. His hands gently stayed on her waist, pulling her a little closer. It was a sweet, short kiss, and when she tilted her head slightly, she could stop smiling. His eyes didn't leave her beautiful face.

"Stay." Ardeth gently rested his forehead against hers. "Stay with me and become my wife." 

"Always." She giggled, feeling tears gathering in her eyes once again, but this time her heart was light like never before. "Marrying you will be an honour." She caressed his neck and cheek with her fingers. "I love you, Ardeth Bay."

"I love you, my dearest." She kissed the corner of his lips, and they both looked to the side, hearing giggling behind bushes. Very quickly, it turned out that it was Alex and Jonathan. She laughed when they started arguing in their typical way. Then Carnahan looked at them with a smile.

"Come on, lovebirds! Looks like it's time to celebrate!" 

Miss O'Connell couldn't stop laughing when she watched her family running inside. She stood up, standing before Ardeth with sparkles in her eyes. She pulled her hand to him, smiled widely, and he took it, bringing it to his lips to put a small kiss on its back. He could see that her cheeks blushed a little, and she rested her hand on his elbow. It was the very beginning of their life together. 

Author’s note: Thank you  so much for reading! If it’s not too much trouble, I would love to hear your thoughts about it. Any feedback is greatly appreciated and motivate me to work.

I am sorry about every grammar mistake and misspellings. English is not my first language.

Klaudia  💜

Taglists are always open! If you want to be added fill this up or send me an ask!

[rebelwrites]

You, Me And The Car (NSFW)

Clay Spenser x Reader

A/N okay so this wasn’t going to be smutty but blame @chibsytelford for the complete 180 of this fic 🥵 and yes that’s my car 😜 but let’s start the month of with a bang quite literally 😜

Warnings: unprotected sex, sex in a public space

Join The Group Chat Here - If You Want Tagging Manually Let Me Know 🖤

Clay Spenser Masterlist

This Months Writing

“Yo Spenser” Your Uncle shouted walking into the garage. “You been ordering shit again?”

“Yo Spenser” Your Uncle shouted walking into the garage. “You been ordering shit again?”

“Would I?” You smirked looking up from the engine bay, wiping your hands on the rag.

“What you got this time?” He asked, sliding the box across the floor.

“New intercooler, air intake. engine mounts and BOV” you grinned grabbing your knife, cutting through the tape on the boxes.

“Am I sensing a remap coming along?” He grinned leaning against the car causing you to growl at him without looking up from the boxes.

“Yes and get your ass off the car before I stab you” you glared.

“You are definitely your old man's kid” he chuckled, grabbing a drink from the mini fridge. “Are we getting all this today?”

“Urm” you said glancing at the clock, Clay was home from deployment today so you needed to make sure you had the car back together in time. “Yeah or as much as we can, Clay is home today”

“Well then kiddo we best get cracking” Alex grinned “Can’t have you being late after not seeing him for the last three months”

“I will be happy is all we get is the air intake and BOV done today, the rest I can do with Clay” you grinned as you slipped your wedding and engagement ring off, placing them between your lips and you fiddled with the clasp on the chain that the other one of Clay’s dog tag sat proudly, slipping your rings onto the chain you secured it back around your neck. The last thing you needed was fucking your rings up. “I’ve lost count how many times these headlights have been off the car now”

“Same here kiddo” Alex smirked, tossing you the ratchet and socket. “Whist we at it we will see if we can sort this fucking bumper sag out”

“Yes it’s been pissing off for a while but doubt there’s much we can do, it’s a Ford remember, the Fez’s are known for bumper sag” you laughed as you pulled the first headlight out.

“Come on you piece a shit just go in the hole goddammit” you shouted at the car as you tried to refit your bumper. “I don’t have time for you to be a cunt”

“And here I thought you loved this car” Alex laughed as he lifted the bumper up giving a bit more play to get the bolts in.

“Yeah well sometimes you need to threaten it and use brut force and ignorance” you laughed as you finally got the right side of the bumper secured. Just as your phone started ringing, placing a smoke between your lips you hit answer without checking who was calling.

“Where are you?” Emma practically shouted down the phone.

“Shit what time is it Em?” You panicked as you grabbed the other bolts, holding your phone between you ear, and cigarette in the corner of your mouth.

“Four thirty” she shouted “shit the plane is just coming into view, you haven’t got long”

“I’ve just gotta get my bumper back on kid, be there as quick as I can, I’m nearly done here. Just do whatever to stall Clay please”

You ended the call without saying bye, you didn’t have much time, the base was at least twenty minutes from her and you still had another five minutes of work and definitely no time to get changed.

In record time you managed to get the bumper back on the car, the tools were just dumped out the way, grabbing your bag and tossed it into the passenger seat. Starting the engine you didn’t even have time to appreciate the roar of the exhaust as you dipped the clutch slamming it into first, dropping the hand brake and wheel spinning out of the garage. Normally it would take twenty minutes to get to the base but you knew you could do it in ten.

The moment the boys walked out of the base, Clay knew something was off, there wasn’t that deep grumble in the air from your car, glancing around he realised you wasn’t there and couldn’t help but laugh, he knew you had parts arriving and more than likely lost track of time.

“Right before you say anything I’ve been asked to stall you” Emma laughed as she looked over Jason’s shoulder. “Something about she still had her bumper to fit, I dunno she might as well been speaking a different language”

“Garage is what twenty minutes away?” Sonny asked.

“Yeah she will get her in ten though” Clay laughed scratching his beard. “How long ago did you speak to her?”

“About twenty minutes ago” Emma nodded giving Clay a hug.

Soon enough there was a grumble that could be heard in the distance making Clay smile, he never needed to know when you arrived your car told him that you were only a mile out. He knew how guilty you were going to feel for being late and he was going to play. So there he stood, bag on the floor next to him, hands shoved in his pockets looking around for you with a sad look on this face.

“That’s evil Blondie” Sonny laughed leaning against his truck, no one had left yet because they wanted to see things play out.

You practically threw the car around the corner as you entered the base car park, you felt like the worst wife ever, having not seen you husband for three months you were late for him getting home. Reaching down you wrapped your fingers around the handbrake, yanking it up as you stomped on the clutch, pulling the steering wheel to the left, sliding the car through the car park stopping a few feet away from Clay.

Climbing out of the car you ran over to him throwing yourself into his arms. His arms instantly wrapping around your waist, he couldn’t keep the act up when it came to you.

“I am so fucking sorry I’m late, the bumper wouldn’t go back on” you rambled.

“Babygirl it’s fine” he whispered squeezing you tight. “I know you love the car more than me”

“Hey that’s not fair” you pouted but laughing “I would have been on time but the fez wasn’t playing ball”

“Stop panicking, you can just make it up to me later” Clay laughed as he placed you on your feet, draping his arm around your shoulder picking his bag up. “Out of interest how long did it take to get here?”

“Eight minutes” you laughed opening the boot.

“Getting quicker” Clay winked before looking over at Sonny. “Tell me you got it on film”

“Of course, number one rule when it comes to the female Spenser is always have your phone on record” Sonny laughed.

“Wanna go for a drive and see where we end up?” You whispered running your finger down Clay’s chest whilst you stole his cap, placing it on your head.

“I like your thinking” he smirked, slapping your arse.

The two of you had been driving for about an hour now, no music was on as you could now enjoy the labour of your work. Every time you changed gear you heard the turbo flutter making you laugh every time. This was the time Clay loved the most, watching you drive, watching as your eyes sparkled, your grin getting bigger by the second and you laughing at yourself.

Pulling into the car park you and Clay had found one day whilst driving, you pulled the handbrake on putting the car into neutral but left it running.

“So I was thinking” you whispered “I want to try something that involves you, me and the car”

“Oh yeah” he smirked, running his hand up your bare thigh. “And what’s this idea babygirl”

“I wanna ride you whilst you are against the bonnet” you breathed closing your eyes at the thought “I want you to take me over the bonnet and fuck me”

“Do you know how long I’ve waited for you to say that” he hummed against your lips “why are we still sat in the car baby”

You never moved so fast in your life, there was just something naughty about this, the fact you could get caught just added to it. You couldn’t help but bite your lip as Clay leant against the bonnet of the car with his jeans dropped round his knees, closing the gap between you, you wrapped you hand around his hard dick, slowly pumping it making him moan as he undid your the button on your shorts. Doing a little wiggle as he pushed the material down, they dropped to your ankles allowing you to step out of them. The moment you lost your thong Clay picked you up positioning your over his dick.

Slowly you sunk down on his length, gasping at the feeling, you were taking things slow as it had been three months and Clay wasn’t exactly small.

“Fuck” you breathed against his lips.

“I know baby” he whispered “so fucking tight”

After a few minutes Clay started lifting you up and down, fully taking your weight as he helped you ride him against your car.

“Clay” you moaned as he changed the pace up, before standing off the car, slamming you down on the bonnet.

“God I missed this feeling” he grunted as he thrusted hard into you making you arch your back, bucking your hips up to get him deeper.

“Fuck fuck fuck” you moaned as his thumb found your clit matching the pace of his hips, “oh god”

“That’s it baby” he groaned biting down on his bottom lip, “fuck I can feel you getting tighter babygirl”

“Clay I’m so close” you whimpered, making him smirk, he knew you were close by how your body was reacting but loved hearing you say it.

It only took a few more hard thrusts for him to send you over the edge screaming his name out for the whole world to hear as you rode out your high, but he didn’t stop thrusting as he chased his own release making your whimpers and moans to get louder, it didn’t help the car was still running so you had the added vibration of the engine beneath you, feeling his grip on your hips tighten he gave one fine thrust, moaning as he came.

Leaning forward he kissed you lovingly as you both regained your breath, his ass on view for every man and their dog to see but neither of you cared, you were too lost in each other.

"I don't know who's louder baby, the grumble of the exhaust or you" he laughed against your lips.

“Definitely me” you giggled, placing your hand on the side of his face, gently caressing his cheek with your thumb as you got lost in his eyes. “I missed you so much”

“I know babygirl, I missed you too, but I’m home now” he breathed, his eyes dropping to your rings around your neck, moving his hands he undid the clasp, sliding the rings off the chain. Before taking your left hand. “Let’s get these back where they belong” he whispered, sliding them back onto your finger before kissing them.

“What do you wanna do now?” You smiled as you leant your head back against the bonnet.

“I was thinking we head home, get a takeaway and cuddle on the sofa, maybe with round two and three thrown in” he smirked as he pulled out of you. He quickly disappeared but returned with a pair of boxers for his bag to clean himself and you up, once the pair of your were dressed he took your hand pulling you into his arms.

“Damn you’ve got some energy today” you giggled looking up at him.

“Well when you have a wife that’s as gorgeous and as fit as you it happens” he laughed kissing your head. “I love you baby”

“I love you too” you whispered “you can drive home, I don’t think my legs are working yet”

“You must love me if you are letting me drive”

@chibsytelford @mrsmarvelous1995 @supervalcsi @talicat713 @disasterfandoms @bravo-four-seal-team @jasonbabymama @jayhalsteadfan-2417 @lotsoflovefromlea @seik-o @ohitsnicolexo @velvetcardiganbucky @phoenixhalliwell @pancakeisreading

[mrsluthordanvers]

Au where Kara used the book of destiny and lose her mind. When Lena wakes up after the crisis nobody can remember Kara.

So I’ll be honest I still don’t fully understand what happened in crisis, but I did my best!

Read on AO3 + my ko-fi

“Supergirl.” Lena greets coldly as two familiar red boots land on her balcony.

A visit is about the last thing she wants right now. She’s still trying to wrap her head around everything Lex was talking about this morning. In one fell swoop, the world she knew was gone, she lost her company, and her brother was being awarded the noble peace prize instead of being sentenced to prison. It’s enough to make her head ache, and the idea of listening to Kara grovel only makes it worse.

“Miss Luthor.” Supergirl replies as she walks into Lena’s office, her cape billowing behind her.

Lena keeps a straight face at Kara’s unusual coolness. It’s reminiscent of the early days of their friendship and Lena hates how it throws her off. After weeks of apologies and begging, Kara stands in the middle of her office every inch the Super she is, looking like she’s inspecting the place.

“If you’re here to explain, there’s no need, Lex already filled me up.” Lena rubs her temples wearily.

Supergirl’s brow furrows as she turns slightly to look at Lena over her shoulder.

“Explain what?”

Lena lifts her head slightly to look Kara in the eye as she turns fully towards her.

“Crisis. The book of destiny, the anti-monitor, Luthor Corp.” Each word falls from Lena’s lips like they leave a bad aftertaste in her mouth.

“I think there might be some confusion as to why I’m here Miss Luthor.”

Lena fully lifts her head this time as she leans back into her chair.

“So, what, you were just going to skip over everything? Hope I didn’t remember so that you don’t have to keep apologizing?”

Supergirl takes a step forward, hands settling on her hips.

“Have I offended you in some way?”

“Offended?” Lena stands, ignoring how her head throbs with every step she takes to round her desk. “You only lied to me for years about your secret identity.”

“My secret identity?”

“This is how we’re going to do this? A new reality, and you go right back to lying to me?”

“Miss Luthor, I really don’t know- “

“Kara Danvers.” Lena seethes. She hates that Kara is forcing her to say it. That she’s still denying it to Lena. “CatCo reporter.”

“Who’s Kara Danvers?”

The words hit Lena like a bucket of ice water. Her whole body stiffens as the hero stares at her with concerned eyes.

“Lena…” Supergirl’s voice is so soft and familiar all of a sudden that it makes Lena’s stomach twist. “Can I take you to the DEO? I think you might be sick.”

“I think you might be right.” Lena finally answers, as she smiles robotically at Supergirl. “But I can’t let you fly me off in the middle of the day.”

Supergirl looks like she’s about to protest when Lena continues, “I will go as soon as I’m done for the day.”

“Promise?”

Lena feels nauseous as she looks at Supergirl looking at her with an expression she’s seen a hundred times.

“’I promise.” Lena croaks.

---

Walking into the DEO is much easier now, Lena realizes. A perk of having her family name written across the floor, everyone is much less surprised to see her. The only head that turns towards the sound of her heels echoing on tile floors is Director Alex Danvers.

Lena barely slows as she signals to the director before letting herself into the nearest office.

“Something’s wrong with Supergirl.” Lena says as soon as she hears the door click.

“Did something happen at your office?”

“You could say that.” Lena scoffs as she turns to look at Alex.

“She went to tell you that we found evidence that Lex is stealing your work, just like you said. What happened?”

That makes Lena pause. She and Kara didn’t actually get around to talking about why she had come by the office. She had flown out the window shortly after Lena promised she’d go to the DEO herself.

“Lex is stealing my work?” Lena blinks. “That bastard is winning a noble peace prize with my work?”

Alex uncrosses her arms and takes a half step forward with a gentle look of concern.

“Lena, is everything alright? You already knew this was happening, we talked about it remember?” Alex takes another cautious half step forward. Lena winces internally as she feels a stab of pain behind her left eye as she realizes in frustration Kara must have already talked to Alex about this morning. “You came to me. You told me that Lex wasn’t everything he seemed. We’ve been looking for this evidence for months…Supergirl wanted to be the one to tell you.”

Of course.

Of course, Kara would want to be the one to tell her. Of course, Kara believes in her. Kara’s always believes in her. Why would the destruction of the multiverse change that?

Lena’s chest tightens, her breathing growing shallow as she reaches out casually to brace herself on the table.

“Lena.” Alex’s face swims before her, her voice coming in and out as she navigates Lena into a chair. “Lena, you need to sit down.”

Lena’s murmuring to herself, calling Lex all sorts of unpleasant names under her breath. “He can recreate the universe but he can’t recreate himself. Same manipulating, cunning, asshole.”

“Recreate the universe? What are you talking about?”

“Lex.” Lena says like it’s completely obvious, before she looks Alex dead in the eyes and sees all the same concern, she had seen in Kara’s eyes this morning.

“God, you don’t remember anything either, do you?”

“Remember what?”

“The multiverse!” Lena stands, inadvertently pushing Alex back.

“The DEO,” Lena points in the direction of the agents she knows sit outside the office, “was a black ops government agency. You were still the director and Supergirl still worked for you. But you told people you were a part of the FBI because people don’t know you exist. And it certainly wasn’t a Luthor subsidiary! I helped out occasionally but…” Lena waves her hand in the air as she continues.

“Luthor Corp. Luthor Corp was L-Corp. I became CEO when Lex was sentenced to 32 consecutive life sentences after trying to kill Superman and murdering innocent people in the process. I’m the one that made it a force for good! Not him!

And Supergirl! Supergirl is Kara Danvers, a sweet, sunny reporter for CatCo magazine because even in her secret identity she can’t stand to see injustice in the world. She’d just won a Pulitzer Award. Your parents adopted her as a child. She’s your sister, she’s my best friend. And no one remembers who she is! She doesn’t even remember who she is!”

Lena’s almost panting by the time she stops. Her throat aches slightly from raising her voice, and her headache is definitely back in full swing.

“You’re not the only one that remembers.”

Lena turns towards the door to find J’onn watching them both.

“Kara seems to be the only Paragon that doesn’t remember what happened.”

“Lex probably made sure of that.” Lena hisses as J’onn just nods in agreement.

“Manipulating someone’s memories can be dangerous. I wanted to be sure it was the right thing to do.”

Lena lifts her chin, jaw muscles clenching slightly. “And, what have you decided?”

J’onn looks over to Alex momentarily before looking back at Lena. “I think it would be best if I restored Alex and Kara’s memories…Lex isn’t what he seems in this world, and he has all of his memories. They can help us better if they have their memories.”

Lena nods, “And everyone else?”

“I can’t.” J’onn says regretfully. “Restoring everyone’s memories could have catastrophic consequences. It would change relationships on such a large scale that the mental impact would- “

“I understand.” Lena sighs, as she lowers herself into a chair. “But Kara and Alex?”

“Should not pose any problems.”

---

“You may want to sit for this.” J’onn suggests gently, not bothering to specify if he is talking to Kara or Alex.

Lena watches as he places hands on both of Alex’s temples and closes his eyes, Alex following his lead. She feels a pang of sympathy as Alex winces every once in awhile, her eyes flicking back and forth under her lids.

Finally, Alex settles and J’onn steps back. It’s a moment longer before Alex’s eyes start to flutter, and she finally opens them. Looking between Lena and J’onn she takes a deep breath but says nothing.

“It’s okay if you need a minute.” J’onn says as he gives Alex’s knee a squeeze.

“Kelly?” Alex croaks, looking relieved when J’onn nods again.

“We can talk to her. I can restore her memories too, if she wishes.”

Then J’onn turns to Kara, waiting as she stares over his shoulder at Lena.

“I’m ready.” Kara says strongly, never breaking eye contact until she closes her eyes at J’onn’s touch.

Kara twitches more then Alex did. Occasionally crying out as she clenches the arms of the chair. The plastic warping under her strength. Lena holds her breath as a single tear runs down Kara’s cheek as J’onn pulls away.

Both J’onn and Alex quietly leave while Kara still sits in her chair, eyes closed, gently breathing.

“Lena?”

“I’m here.” Lena whispers as she shifts quietly to the chair closest to Kara.

“I’m really sorry.” Kara whimpers, her eyes scrunching up against more tears.

Lena nods despite Kara’s eyes still being closed. “I’m sorry too.”

Lena takes a deep breath when watery blue eyes blink open to look as her.

“I made a terrible mistake. I was hurt…I was so hurt, and, I thought I could get rid of the hurt…I thought I could push you away.” Lena’s voice shakes as she lifts a hand to stop Kara from talking. “But I can’t…For a moment this morning I was forced to live a reality where Kara Danvers didn’t exist. And I realized…I realized I’d rather be fighting with you than push you out of my life again, because even for a moment, not having you in my life was the worse thing I could imagine.”

Lena blinks, taking in another long shuddering breath as Kara stares at her for a long moment.

“I’m still going to need some time…”

“I know.” Kara whispers.

“But I’d really like to start working towards being your friend again…if you’ll have me?”

It’s like every tense muscle in Kara’s body deflates at those words as she smiles softly at Lena.

“Always.”

[theobxhummingbird]

A helpless moment when you found me. -Luke Patterson x Reader.

Summary: It all starts with a few cups of orange juice, and ends with 1 liter of tears. Luke Patterson needs to find a way of winning her back into his life.

A/N: @beautifulblogsblog enjoy this little emotional Luke x Reader imagine, my very very emotional self put together. Thank you for suggesting this story. 🤗🤗

(GIF CREDIT TO OWNER)

It all started, when Sunset Curve started to get known by bigger audience. All the teenage girls were crazy over the four, cute boys; they even got called on TV to promote their album; sold t-shirts and played a few shows out of town. All in all, the bandmates succeeded in making it to the side of the buses, or on the lock screens of many phones.

Luke’s dream was to have his music, listened by many people around the world; and it worked, which had him talk about it for days. And it was all going well with him, until everything about his music career started to blind him. Bobby, Reggie and Alex were doing great, not too much dedicated into the music, well, not as much as Luke. It touched him so much, the need of his music being heard, as well as his name, that he even freshly made up from a fight with his mum. Emily and Mitch were understanding parents. At the beginning, they didn’t accept the idea of his 17-year-old son, playing in a rock band, but when they all sat down to talk about it, the wild waters calmed, and they were able to speak the same language.

 Luke, wasn’t only lucky to have two amazingly supportive and understanding people in his life, but one more, who always had the time to sit down and listen to what he had to let out of his heart. She, who was his first text in the morning, and last text at night; she, who was his few missed calls; she, who was the whole sunshine he could need in his life. She, who loved him with her entire heart; more than herself. He was thankful. He was so thankful, until she became the person that would wait for him to text first or call first, rather than bothering him. She became the place he’d come to, if he needed a person to tell all his matters to. But what she became, that caused her the entire pain in the world, was becoming the one who always waited for him at the table they reserved for their date.

And, together with his promise of never letting her hanging again, Y/N hopefully waited at the table. Her sixth ordered cup of orange juice, had the orange line at the bottom of the cup, letting the waiter know, she had finished another one. Other than a big vase of flowers, and empty eating supplies; that once used to be filled with delicious food, now there was nobody else at the table. She checked the time, and he was now four hours late.

The amount of respect and love Y/N had for Luke, kept her sat on that chair for four hours. And she wouldn’t have even moved, if it wasn’t for the waiter who let her know that there’s a couple that reserved the table after them. She managed to pay him for the drinks, and her trembling body made it out of the now, least favorite restaurant on her list of date places she and Luke went to; well if he came, they would’ve had a great time and she wouldn’t have to put it at the least favorites, just like the one he left her the last time.

With the second time of leaving her hanging, Y/N thought he’d learned from the mistake he made and they wouldn’t need to argue with each other. This---this was another disrespect for her, and God knew where he was. No text, nor calls appeared from him, and it made her more worried, than mad that night.

And like for every person, there’s times where unluckiness catches us in a trap. Suddenly, all that happens that day or night, is bad. It not only ruins our day/night, but it ruins our life and us in whole. It started to pour. Immediately, it soaked Y/N to her bones, and the only escape she had, was to run in those puddles that formed in the cracks of the pavement, and hide under and awning of a bar that was not too far from where she was. Y/N pulled the sides of her jacket towards each other, trying to warm herself, by blowing and rubbing her hands together. The bar seemed to still be opened, but she couldn’t really be sure because it was hard to see from the foggy window. She wiped away the fogginess with her elbow, revealing a surprising picture; one, she couldn’t really believe. Luke, Reggie, Alex and Bobby, all gathered around a girl. Her hair strands, were stuck to her face, and her face was traced with water lines, but not from the rain; she was now, fully in tears. As if four hundred knives were stabbed in her back, Y/N turned her back, and stepped out in the rain---after what she saw, there was nothing that could hurt her more.

She was a slave to the heartache, and it controlled her in every way. Y/N’s broken figure, entered the empty hallway of her home, but luckily her parents were asleep to even see her in that state. And it was for their and her best, even Luke’s, because they were very protective over their daughter. She didn’t even change into pajamas, neither did she dry her hair. The covers were pulled over her body, and she was fast asleep, getting the warmth, of her cold body and warm breathing.

Like others say though, the mother instinct is never wrong. She was fast awake when she heard the doors open. Tip toeing away from her sleeping husband, so he doesn’t argue about leaving their so in love daughter, to live her teenage love years, she slowly opened the door of Y/N’s room. She quietly gasped at the state she was in, and sat on her bed, feeling the soaked clothes she was sleeping in. And it wasn’t only from the rain, but now from the sweating that soaked her pillow. Y/N was shaking, and her cheeks were burning red.

-Wake up, wake up! -she shook her husband. He jumped out of bed, and followed her to their daughters room.

-Y/N. Y/N. Y/N. 

No answer. The next thing, her dad picked her up and rushed to the car in his pajamas, her mother following him. The car drove away from their house, and her dad was driving fast to the hospital. He carried her in his hands, until the medical staff took care of her. She was frozen and her lips were bruised. They put a breathing mask immediately, and her heart rate was very low.

It was a nightmare of a night for the Y/L/N family, and it scared Y/N’s parents, that her mother had to also be taken care of. Her dad got himself a cup of tea from the canteen and sat outside the hospital room, waiting for his wife and daughter to get better. And he waited, until the doctor called him to his office.

-Y/N hadn’t eaten properly for days, and stress reacted even more. Also, she got soaked, which completed the state she is in now. Your daughter needs to eat, Mr. Y/L/N and stay away from stress as much as possible. It’s not a joke, it’s a life we’re talking about; a life of a young person. Here’s the pills she needs to drink for her curing. She’ll be held in the hospital for two days, then we’ll release her home. 

Her dad bought the pills, as soon as he left the office. And the man wasn’t stupid, to not understand that the stress, might involve Luke as well. He didn’t call him though. If the boyfriend of her daughter, was wise enough to check up on his girlfriend, he would’ve called himself. So, he was back to waiting.

Luke on the other hand, was at home. Sweaty from the big performance he had to do that night. And, we would all blame him for leaving Y/N alone, but the reason behind him leaving her hanging, is heartwarming from one side for another person, but painful and risky for Y/N. He changed into clean, and dry clothes, and sat on his bed, to see what Y/N’s up to, and explain what happened, that he couldn’t even text, nor call her. No answer. He called her dad, her mum, but none of them answered. So, he went to bed thinking they’re all sleeping, though, something kept aching his heart, that he couldn’t close his eyes as soon as he placed his head on the pillow. He kept tossing and turning, but it didn’t work, until finally, he found the best position, and fell into a deep sleep.

Y/N’s mother woke up before her the next morning, and stayed listening to her daughter, repeating Luke’s name in her sleep. Though, she also didn’t want to call him, thinking the same way as her husband. Y/N didn’t still open her eyes, and as much as the doctors and nurses wanted to, and even tried waking her, she wasn’t waking up. Her mother now went to treat herself a cup of tea, after the night she had.

-Mrs. Y/L/N? -said a voice from behind her. She turned around with a confused expression, but it dropped when she saw Reggie; Luke’s bandmate, who she met once at a show the Y/L/N family went to, to support Luke.

-Hello Reggie. How are you?

-I’m great Mrs. Y/L/N, actually how are you, is there something wrong?

-Yes Reggie, there is. Y/N is going to be held here for two days. Yesterday she came home soaked, and got sick so we had to rush her to the hospital, because she couldn’t wake up.

-Ca-can I see her please? -his eyes were filled with tears and worry.

-Sure. Come with me. -she placed a hand on his shoulder and walked him to the hospital room. Unnoticeably, he sent and SMS to Luke, quickly sending away what happened to Y/N, hoping his friend will come to take care of his girl.

-Oh no, Y/N. -he said, taking a hold of her frozen hand.

After getting out of the shower, Luke finally looked at his messages, and it took him a second to slip his shoes on, and basically run to the hospital with his wet hair.

-Y/N Y/L/N! -he breathlessly said to the person at the register.

-Room 200. -she said, and he tapped the elevator button, but couldn’t wait for it, so he took the stairs. When he got to the hallway, where her parents were stood, his heart dropped at the scene. Both of them in pajamas still, with barely any sleep, because of him.

-Mrs. Y/L/N. -he said in tears. 

-Go Luke, go next to her. We’ll talk about it later. -she rubbed his back, and he wiped away his tears, and entered the room, where Reggie was waiting, who jumped up and left, so he could be next to Y/N.

-Oh, my beautiful girl. I’m so sorry, it’s my fault.-he brushed away some hair from her face, and trailed his hand down her cheek. He took a hold of both of her hands, kissing them many times, and grabbing the sheets of the bed, so he could quietly cry in them. A warm line was traced under his eyes, and it disappeared at the corner of his eye.

-Don’t cry. -her raspy voice, made it to his ears, as his head shot up.

-Oh Y/N, I’m so sorry-

-Don’t be Luke.-she turned her head to the window, where her parents were stood. She blinked as an approval of them entering the room. 

-Baby. -said her mother, and went to kiss her temple, followed by her dad. -How are you feeling?

-I’m feeling better. Can we go home now? -she lifted herself to sit up, but her mother pressed her down back on the bed.

-The doctor said two days. Tomorrow you’ll be home anyways.

-Fine then. Let’s follow what the doctor said, I guess. -she sent a sad smile towards her parents. They saw what the situation was, and left them alone, even though Y/N’s look begged them not to leave her alone with Luke.

-Can I explain myself? -he asked softly.

-Of course. -she positioned herself, so her back could rest against the pillow.

-We had to do this last minute show, Y/N. It was for a kid’s operation money for aboard, and they needed to be sent that night. They asked us, and we couldn’t say no to that poor family. For else, you know I wouldn’t repeat my mistakes.

-I’m glad the kid’s got operation money. Hope he’ll, heal as soon as possible.

-I’m so sorry, baby. -he said, wiping his tears away and rubbing his wet hands off his jeans, -I’ll leave you now, because it’s obvious you don’t want me here. I’ll come later again, love you so much princess.

She opened her mouth to talk, but Luke was out the door, and he stopped to look at her from the window, but she pretended as if she’s looking out the other window in the room.

-If you loved me, you could’ve at least stayed. I don’t want you to go. -she whispered through her tears. It was the most painful feeling of her life, listening to him say that she doesn’t want him. She wanted him. And it hurt her more and more, knowing he’d done something beautiful for another kid. But he sacrificed her life, and happiness. The part with the girl at the bar, stayed as a question mark in Y/N’s head.

Y/N’s dad had a talk with Luke, and when he explained everything that happened, he couldn’t only be on his side, rather as a father, he took Y/N’s side first, then giving the right to Luke. 

-The choices you make in a relationship, you make for you and your loved one. A relationship is led by two people, and whatever they decided, it should never affect only one person. I know how much you love my daughter, it’s all written in your eyes kid. But I love her more than any other guy could ever love her. She’s a part of my soul, and even if one fiber gets damaged of her, I’ll ruin this world. Make up with her, please, I don’t want to see you grieving for each other. You’re a great couple, and it’s really sad to see her alone in that room over there.

It stayed with him the whole day, those words by Y/N’s father. He sat on his bed, and the only thing that couldn’t make him so helpless was writing. He took his music notebook, and started writing what he felt towards the girl, who was now being begged to eat. It worked after a few tries, but she was able to put some proper food into her system. Alex, Reggie and even Bobby came to visit her. Though, there was a girl waiting at the door; the same girl from the bar.

-Who’s that over there? Why is she standing alone? 

-It’s my girlfriend, Rose. -said Bobby.

-Ah huh. -she said, a sigh of relief was supposed to follow, but instead her heart relaxed, knowing Bobby probably wanted the boys to meet her while they’re there. 

After they left, not too long after, Luke came as promised. This time, he really came, together with his guitar, and bags of fruit he bought.

-You parents said you can’t have any tough food, so I thought your favorite fruits are a great idea. -he left them on the table, and sat down next to Y/N’s bed.

-You came. -Y/N said, holding back a big smile. He looked really handsome, even though he didn’t even try to. It was what had her attracted to him the most at the moment.

-I came to sing you to sleep. -he said, and positioned his guitar. Y/N slipped down to her laying position, and patiently waited for him to start singing. When he did, she realized that the words are completely new, and unknown to her, which meant he wrote them freshly. And he did. He wrote her a song, about how he’s sorry and if he’d take back the time, he’d fix everything, but still remain the Luke she loves.

After he finished, Y/N applauded and rested her hand on a writing, carved onto his guitar.

-Why ‘Y/I’ (Y/I= your initials)? -she traced it with her fingers.

-For Y/N Y/L/N. My Y/N Y/L/N.-he smiled.

Y/N sat up and rested her back against her pillow, as few tears fell down her face, quickly wiping them away so Luke doesn’t notice. He still thought she was mad at him, with the right to be, so he nodded his head and sat up to leave the room, just like he did earlier, although this time, it wasn’t clear if he would come back again. Y/N swiftly lingered her fingers onto his, and it gave her life; his touch.

-I-I need you...Let’s make up. -she said and swallowed her tears. Luke slowly spun around and sat on the bed. She cupped his face and wiped away his tears, as he did the same, resting their foreheads on top of each other.

-I’m sorry Y/N. I’m sorry for doing the same mistake again. Please forgive me and give me the chance to make up to you. I love you so much,

-It’s fine Luke. It all was gone with another day. Let’s focus on the ones that are coming. I love you too, so much. And the song was beautiful, I can’t even explain to you.

-Yeah? Well, since we made up and sang a song, you must now eat at least one orange, okay?

-Okay fine. -she said lazily, and Luke managed to peel one for her. She made a sour face when she tasted it, and Luke placed a kiss to her lips, getting a taste of its bitterness and making a face as well, which made her laugh. For the first time since the day before, she managed to remember what laughing feel like. As well as crying, and going through pain, all because of the one boy, she loved with her entire life. Mutually getting the same love, from him; her Luke Patterson.

[incorrect-sdv-quotes]

Okay so I know this is a SDV Incorrect quote blog but I really wanted to show off my SDV headcanon’s so you may ignore this post if you wish (I’ll go back to the normal posts after this, I have like 13 quotes queue’d up right now) 

Headcanon’s under the cut:

1.Alex’s real first name is Alexander he just prefers to go by Alex

2.Alex is a trans male so he was born female but transitioned to male at age 13

3.The bachelors ages are (listed youngest to oldest):

 Alex: 19 

Sebastian: 19 (one month older then Alex)

Sam: 20

Harvey: 25-30

Elliott: 36

Shane: 38

4.Despite Sam being older then him Alex is taller (if you put them side by side Sam looks taller but that’s only cause of his hair if you flattened it you could see Alex was taller)

5.Sebastian is secretly a vampire (He does look like one anyway)

6. Haley and Alex kind of have a Hazel and Xander from Bunk’d relationship where they’re kinda friends but one of them *cough cough* Haley *cough* has a huge crush on the other to where it’s at yandere point- Haley is not QUITE as crazy about Alex that Hazel is about Xander and unlike Hazel Haley can hide the craziness she does have around people but when it’s just her and Alex she’s all crazy and clingy- 

Like, she’ll call him pet names like “My jock prince” or “Alex-zandy-” or “My knight in shining armor” Etc. etc- or hug him and never let go until someone LITERALLY prys her off- Talk about nutty nutty nut-so-

7. My headcanon voices for the bachelors are: (Well some of them, if a name is in strike through that means I don’t have one for that one- yet)

Alex: Shining Armor from MLP

Sebastian

Sam: Rottmnt Leo/2020 Sonic the Hedgehog/Dewy from Ducktails (this one might change)

Harvey: Fozzie Bear (Harvey: WaKa WaKa (I’m sorry))

Elliott: Gunther from Shake It Up

Shane

8.Shane is basically the god of chickens he’s such a good caretaker of chickens that he could summon an army of chickens to peck the eyes out of everyone in town with one “Babock” CHICKEN ARMY!!

If you decided to read this post and you liked my headcanons then this is it for now more might be added later as I play the game and scroll through the SDV tags on Tumblr more 

EDIT 1: More headcanons!:

9: Elliott is an amazing actor but a horrid horror-movie actor (It’s just his screams are unrealistic he will literally just say “Aaaah” otherwise it’s the same as the rest of his acting) (This scream-glitch is an easy fix if you yell “Ghost” more on that in 10)

10: Elliott is TERRIFIED of ghosts even those cute and/or clearly fake ghosts (Why else do you think Spirits Eve/Halloween has Skeletons every year and not ghosts? No one wants to scare anyone Too bad.) Actually Alex dared Elliott to watch the Disney Junior show Vampirina which went fine until Demi came on screen- Elliott literally wet himself and screamed for 3 whole hours- (Poor Alex who had to listen to that the whole time-)

11: Elliott treats his pocket crab as his ACTUAL son, not as his pet but as his actual biological son (it’s actually really cute)

12: The portraits in this video for a portraits mod is how the characters actually look to me (Excluding Elliott Sam and Sebastian they still live in my brain with their cannon looks): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cmBW8BzSZpU&list=WL&index=1&t=5s

13: Krobus is Sebastian’s father (yeah you THINK it would not make sense along with Hc numb.5 but if you think about it if his father is a monster and his mother is human he’s gonna be born as a human-looking monster! Which is a Vampire!)

EDIT 2: Damnit. I was scrolling through this and I realized I missed a Hc and it slipped through the original post and the EDIT 1!

14: Alex has Dyslexia (this bugger Hc belonged in the original post but it slipped through both edits)

EDIT 3: MORE HEADCANNONS-

15: Both Abigail and Sebastian used to have hair to match their parents (Abby’s was brown (Like said in game) and Sebastian’s was Ginger) but due to their “Unusual” parents (Abigail: Wizard Sebastian: Krobus) their hair changed color when they got older and their mothers just pretended they died their hair so both the towns people and Abigail and Sebastian themselves would not freak out 

16: Sebastian has snake bite piercing's but he only wears them when he’s alone (he got them in the first place cause 1: Sam dared him and 2: he decided it would be a fun way to rebel against dead to Sebastian Demetrius, he didn’t have to keep them but he ended up liking the look) 

17: Sebastian owns a giant frog plush, it’s twice the size of him, is really soft and is incredibly fat (it’s to the point it’s just a circle that has stubby legs) he loves it more then anything Excluding Alex but he does not want anyone finding out he loves it let alone owns it so he stuffs it under his bed when people are in and/or near his room

18: Sebastian’s first word was literally “Froggy”

Ex:

Robin: Can you say “mama”?

Baby!Sebastian: ...Froggy!

Robin:

Robin: Out of all words your first word is “Froggy”? Really?

19: The shortest to tallest Bachelors are:

Shane

Sam (If you take his hair and go *Squishes flat*)

Alex

Sebastian

Sam (If you count the added height from his Mullet)

Harvey

Elliott (Tall stinky sea dude)

20: Sam got Sebastian to scream “Bubbles” for 5 hours straight 

Details on that:

Sam: It’s impossible to say “Bubbles” threateningly

Sebastian:

Five munities later:

Robin: Uhhhh Sam? Why is my son on the roof screaming “BUBBLES”?

21: Sebastian owns a biker jacket but he only wears it when riding his motorcycle cause the jacket makes him look way more goth then emo and he prefers the emo look over goth look despite he acts more like a goth

22: One Feast of The Winter Star Sebastian got everyone an empty box and when they opened it Seb said: “It’s a void of nothingness. Just like life.” He did not get in trouble or nothing cause your allowed to give what you want but he did not do that again

23: Sebastian requires glasses to read, he can see perfectly but when it comes to reading on a computer or on paper he needs glasses

24: Sam does a perfect Darth Vader voice and Darth Vader breathing noises

25: Sebastian has vampire powers (cause he is a vampire (Hc 5)), he knows about them and is chill about it but he does not use them unless necessary cause he just does not feel the need to use them otherwise (His powers include, immortality (he also can’t be killed cause on my take on Vampires the stuff that “Traditionally” harms/kills them is just a mith and actually does nothing to them), super strength, increased speed, fast self-healing, telekinesis (I know this is not “Traditionally” a vampire power but Seb does have it) and the ability to change into a bat)

26: Both Sebastian and Elliott are actually pretty jacked (Not Alex level jacked but still) you just can’t see it unless they’re shirt-less (but in Seb’s case at least loose the hoodie)

27: Harvey’s doctor’s mallet weapon is just as heavy and as big as himself so he rarely goes into combat cause he has trouble welding his own weapon- 

Harvey: Time to explore the mines! *grabs his giant doctors mallet*

Harvey: Nope going down. *falls backward with a thud*

28: Elliott carries at least one very sharp pencil with him at all times so if he sees a very annoying person or a slime that escaped the mines he’ll grab it and go *StAb*

29: Everyone else makes Hermit jokes around Elliott which he finds funny and annoying at the same time (They used to do the jokes about Sebastian as well but they stopped cause when they did Seb strangled them Darth Vader style) Ex of the hermit jokes:

*singing* Someone’s on the beach with a hermit! There’s a hermit on the beach I know I know! Someone’s on the beach with a hermiiiit! And the hermit’s name is Elliott!

30: If you think Elliott’s cannon SDV schedule is anti-social you should see how anti-social he gets when writing a book-

EDIT 4: Surprise, there’s more

31: Elliott is a mermaid merman (he’s a human by day half human half fish by night but he’ll change forms sooner if you dump water on him- found that out by Haley throwing water on him in hopes he’ll melt-)

32: When in ‘fish’ form Elliott’s tail is incredibly strong (if you get hit by it you’ll go flying 900 feet in the air in 5 seconds at full strength)

33:Elliott only lets Harvey call him “Elly” if anyone else does so expect Elliott to dump water on himself then hit you with his fish tail)

34:Vincent will sing The Little Mermaid song “Under the sea” around Elliott and Sebastian (Sebastian cause think about it and Elliott cause he’s an IRL Mermaid)

[lovecolibri]

Things that Spark Joy-3x13

Extremely late but not forgotten! Also, because this is so late and I’ve had time to sit with all the things that hit wrong but I couldn’t put a name to yet, this will....probably be a little short. It seems that the RNM finale curse has struck again (salty, salty, salt post here), but there were still some good moments, so let’s find joy where we can!

I do like that the radios came back into play

We got some Liz and Kyle science bros

I do like that Max and Michael got to have a moment to talk to each other, we have been missing more of that dynamic so them sharing a scene with just them was nice and I really loved Michael’s “ We can’t walk away from the tough conversations with the people who love us” because that applies to them and Isobel as a family as well as their respective soulmates. Hoping for more Pod Squad moments in season 4 which will hopefully occasionally include them teaching Dallas all things alien

I like Heath so much more now that we know he’s been doing this all to save Dallas, and the fact that he knows Liz’s “idea” face was cute. I just want him to be part of the Liz/Kyle/Michael science bros squad.

KYLE DANCING TO SHANIA TWAIN. That’s it. That’s the post. I love him so much! Also, his absolute delight at getting to stab Max with a giant needle without sedating him! Kyle gets to be a little bit mean and petty towards his ex’s BF, as a treat!

I’ve been pretty “Meh” about Echo since season 1 when they didn’t let Liz stay mad at him for Rosa’s death, but they did have some really soft moments (finally) this episode. I have some....other thoughts about the actual reason, but I do think it was important that the show finally tell us why Liz is as drawn to Max as he is to her and the story about them being kids and feeling connected was cute, and the way he just stared at her while breathing through the pain was some good Soulmates content which is what we’re all here for anyway.  Also, I am NOT immune to The Height Difference, and her trying to snuggle him and still fitting under his chin even with him sitting was 🥺🥺🥺

Finally we got a little bit of the Michael breakdown I’ve been wanting! Vlamburn always bring such life to their scenes but man, Vlamis and his face crumpling during the “What if I have to kill my own father. Are you gonna love me then? Am I still gonna love myself?” was something else. 🥺🥺🥺 And Alex’s reassurance of “We defeated one monstrous father, we’ll do it again” was so perfect. I love that we got lots of soft, unhurried, gentle kisses this year and Alex tugging on Michael’s arms to ask for goodbye/good luck kisses was so cute.

Unpopular opinion, I don’t mind when Liz calls Max by his full name. I made another post about how names carry weight (that I wasted half an hour looking for so I could link it but Tumblr WILL NOT FIND IT FOR ME), but also given how many times the writers had weird name moments like Michael suddenly calling Alex “Manes” out of nowhere, and Max calling Michael “Guerin” for...some reason, I do like that the kept up the tradition of Liz calling Max by his full name when she’s having A Moment. I also like how Jones flips the script and calls her “Elizabeth” which Max never does.

Another unpopular opinion, I think if you’re going to go with a doppelgänger/body swapping story, you’d better damn well use all the tropes. So Max and Jones switching bodies back and forth and Max popping into a body that’s currently stabbing someone, and switching just in time to get tased by Alex was deeply hilarious and satisfying to me.

I also enjoyed the teamwork with Michael distracting Jones enough for Liz to hop up and snag the serum. They all work better together as a group because (for the most part) they all have their strengths. 

Kyle continues to be the single holder of the Common Sense Brain Cell. Of course he has a fire extinguisher in his car! Kyle deserves all the praise for being the main reason everyone hasn’t died already.

My other Big Unpopular Opinion is that the scene with both Jones and Max acting like Max was great. Again, if you’re going with the doppelgänger/body swapping thing, you have to actually USE it. Plus, it gave us that moment you always need in these stories where you see that the knowledge of a person and their relationship to each other isn’t the important part. That there is more to love and connection that just knowing the facts about something that happened. Those moments are colored by the emotions and connections that happen, and this was a great way to solidify the Soulmates of it all.

I loved the Pod Squad + Dallas moment and that they are learning they need to communicate and decide things together as a group. (slightly petty moment of joy for me too given that Dallas was the only one invited to join the discussion). Michael is so delighted when he startles Dallas with the acetone reveal and I just love them as friends SO MUCH. I cannot wait for more Dallas and I hope he’s here forever now.

We finally got another Kyle/Rosa scene and I’m glad they FINALLY got her papers (putting my blinders on for this one as Alex for sure would have done this ages ago but I digress), and I love that Kyle realizes that she needs some freedom to go explore and gives her a means to do so. She had better start every sentence in season 4 with “well, when I was in New York” otherwise what is even the point?

We got an actual Echo dance since the last one was with Jones which was sweet. Again, if they don’t start season 4 with Echo obnoxiously shoving photos of their beach vacation in everyone’s faces, what is the point?

Again, blinders and putting aside other feelings about it, I love that Malex got a moment together to put Jesse behind them after 3x09 brought a lot of that back up for Alex especially, and them holding hands going down Main Street was a nice callback to Michael’s comment in the bunker earlier. And despite everything else, Vlamburn continue to deliver in their body language and every micro expression.

The Kybel set up was good this season and I can’t wait for it to happen in season 4. Lily and Trevino have such great chemistry, but I’m so sad he didn’t get the dance. Someone please hug that man, he’s been through so much in the past few weeks!

I like the set up for season 4 and the new alien who could possibly be the person Jones called. Are we finally going to talk about The Alighting?! We get a professor that knows Liz? I am definitely intrigued!

[rhys-writes-sometimes]

Music Worth Making Part 6: Finally Free

Requested: yes actually lol

Warnings: Luke’s birthday is in this chapter, so sadness, but I think that’s it (other than bad writing of course)

Series Summery: When the reader’s life is ripped away from them, they’re distraught. But with her two best friends and three certain ghosts, maybe the afterlife isn’t so bad after all. 

Chapter Summery: You and the band play at your first gig.

Word Count: 3,233

A/N: Aaaa I’m so sorry this took so long! I was in a bit of a writing slump, and then school started. Also, I was trying really hard not to cry writing Luke’s birthday scene, so I have no idea how I’m gonna get through Unsaid Emily. Anyway yeah I hope you enjoy!

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Masterlist

______________________________________________________

“How can we die if we’re already dead?” Luke asked, locking eyes with you.

After what happened in the gym last night, you decided you needed a little time alone, to process everything. Whatever it was had scared you, badly. 

You poofed into the Molina’s guest room, where Danny was staying. Wincing when you landed on your bad foot, you limped over to the window seat and sat, looking out at the street below. It was such a neighborhood. It was hard to believe that anything bad could happen here.

And yet, it had.

You gasped as the memory of the club came rushing back to you. Not the fun you had, but before that. Seeing the man who had killed you floating above the table. The Club had somehow made you forget that your host was a murderer. 

Sometime around 9 am, you decided to go check on the boys. They had been hit with the jolt too, after all.

“Y/N!” Reggie called out as you appeared in the studio.

“Where’d you go last night?” Luke asked from his chair. 

“I just needed some time to think.”

Luke nodded once, knowing from your tone not to pry.  “Uh, hey, we were gonna go to a cafe, you wanna come?”

“Oh! Yeah, yeah sure. Sounds fun.”

Luke narrowed his eyes slightly in confusion, but grabbed your hand and teleported to the cafe. 

-----

“Oh, great angle, yeah,” Reggie said as the lady snapped a picture of her food. For some reason, you, Alex, and Reggie were all sitting with this lady while Luke was standing at the counter. 

“Is this what we’re here for?” Alex asked, his voice showing that he was regretting all of his life decisions. “To watch people take pictures of food?”

“It’s fun!” Reggie defended himself. “Watch this, people never stop looking at their phones.” He began to move the woman’s food around the table. She looked around in confusion before leaving the cafe. The three of you chuckled. 

“Plus, Luke said something about this place being a hot spot for music industry people.”

“Boys!” Luke said, sitting down in the chair the lady had just left. He glanced at you before continuing: “and, uh, Y/N, being a ghost definitely has it’s privileges. I just wrote our names on the playlist for tonight.”

“I’m getting a little worried about him,” Alex said, speaking to you but loudly enough so that the others could hear him. “He keeps forgetting that Julie quit the band.”

“And that she’s gonna come back!” Luke protested. “Just as soon as she knows we have a great gig.”

You bit your lip. You knew how stubborn Julie was, and she was pretty mad at the boys.

“But if she doesn’t come back, let's not forget we do have somewhere else we can play,” Reggie said, noticing the look on your face. “And eat pizza.”

“Dude, I know, it was awesome to be seen by lifers at Caleb’s party-” you flinched. “-but we got this with Julie. We don’t need him.”

Pain flared through your body again, almost making you fall out of your seat. It was getting worse; it felt like being stabbed again.

“It’s that same thing again,” Alex said, rubbing his side.

“Just like yesterday!” Luke added. 

“It feels like that time I was fixing my amp in the rain,” Reggie said. You stared at him.

“You shouldn’t… okay,” Alex started, giving up. 

“Look, do you think something’s wrong with us?” you asked, to no one in particular. 

“Yeah, yeah, we ate 10 pounds of pizza yesterday without a stomach. I’m sure it’s just our bodies working through it,” Luke said, although there was a hint of worry in his voice. 

“So we’re just gonna forget about getting back at Trevor?” Reggie said, desperate to change the subject. “That jerk stole our music!”

“And he has to live with that guilt. It’s like what Julie said, we have a new band, a new sound, okay? That’s what we should be focusing on.” Luke leaned back in his chair, looking at the three of you. 

Alex suddenly sat up straighter. “Isn’t that Willie?” he said, walking out the door. 

Reggie smirked. “Well, someone’s not focusing on our music.” You gave a small laugh. 

“Hey, Y/N, are you okay?” Luke said, leaning over the table towards you. 

“Oh, oh yeah, I’ve just got a lot on my mind right now,” you said, giving him a small smile. 

He leaned back in his chair, chewing his lip. He knew you weren’t being completely honest, but he didn’t push it. 

-----

“We’re sorry

So sorry

We’re super-duper, crazy stupid

Sorry!”

The boys sang as Julie walked into the studio.

“In case you missed it, we’re all really sorry,” you said, walking over to her. 

“Yeah, I… I got that part.”

“We’ve been here for like, three hours,” Alex said, high-fiving Reggie.

“We almost sang to your little brother.”

“He comes in here a lot. Mainly to use the bathroom.”

“It’s not our favorite part of the day,” Alex whispered. 

“But, Julie, it wasn’t okay that we flaked on the dance last night,” Luke said, getting the group back on topic. 

“We know we let you down,” you said, moving to stand with the boys. 

“And none of us wanted to disappoint you,” Alex said quickly. “You’re the best thing that’s happened to us since we became ghosts.”

“So, in hopes that you’ll rejoin the band, we booked a new gig,” Luke said, nervously handing Julie the flyer.

“A mega important, life-changing gig,” Reggie smiled. 

“Oh, okay, check it out. Tons of managers go here to listen to new bands. All we gotta do is blow them all away, and we’re living the dream.”

“So, this means a lot to you, huh?” Julie said coldly. “Kind of like how playing in front of my entire school meant a lot to me.”

“Sounds like sarcasm… I’m starting to think our plan isn’t working,” Reggie muttered to you and Alex. 

“Look, we know we messed up,” Alex started. 

“But, we need you in the band,” Luke finished. 

“Of course you do. Because without me, no one can see you guys playing.” You looked at the ground in shame as Julie spoke. “You know, I thought that the music we were writing was special, but you’re too obsessed with your past to even care.”

“I do care!” Luke protested. “Our band has a real chance at greatness, and I’m not gonna let that get away from us again!”

“Uh-huh. Right. So then why did you bail on me to get back at Trevor? I’ll tell you why. ‘Cause there’s only one thing you care about, Luke Patterson, and that’s yourself.”

She turned and stormed out of the garage. “Y/N, are you coming?” she called out. You glanced at the boys apologetically before following your best friend. 

-----

Julie sat on the couch, quietly scribbling down answers to her math homework. You sat in the chair next to her, sketching on a piece of paper you had found. 

“You uh, you got a second?” Alex asked as the boys poofed in. Julie ignored them, turning on the couch so they wouldn’t be in front of her. You stared at the paper you were holding. 

“Oh my gosh, she can’t see us anymore!” Reggie exclaimed. Alex gave him a look; Reggie muttered “oh.”

Alex sat on the arm of the couch. “Julie, please.”

“I already told you, I’m done with the band,” she finally spoke. 

“Yeah, we know, alright? But before you decide that forever, we just… we wanted you to know that Luke isn’t as selfish as you think he is.”

“Yeah, you’ve got him all wrong,” Reggie spoke up. 

Julie scoffed and went back to her homework.

“You remember that song ‘Emily’? Can we at least show you who that’s about?”

-----

You never thought you would be spying on a ghost boy, but here you were. The four of you had walked to a house not too far away from Julie’s, and were peering through the front window from a distance. Luke was sitting on the counter, his eyes red from crying, watching an older couple move around the kitchen. It was Luke’s parents house.

“So, Emily’s his mom?” Julie asked, peering out from behind a tree. 

“Yeah. Yeah, Luke comes here a lot,” Alex said, crouching behind a chair. 

“He thinks we don’t know but, we’ve been following him,” Reggie admitted. “All he does is just, hang out like this and watch them. They never really do anything, though.”

“They’re having cake,” you noted. “That’s something.”

“It’s a… it’s a birthday cake. For Luke.” 

A tear slid down your cheek, matching the boy inside. 

“I never knew Luke was hurting this much,” Julie said.

“Yeah. It’s even worse because when he died, he… left on bad terms. You know, his parents didn’t want their 17-year-old to be in a rock band, so… he just left.” Alex said softly. “He never got the chance to make up with them.”

You watched as Luke blew out his birthday candle. His parents relit it and blew it out together.

“That’s why Luke was so angry,” you guessed, tears falling freely. “If Trevor had given Luke credit for writing all the songs, then…” you trailed off.

“His parents would have known his dreams were worth chasing,” Reggie sighed.

“They would have been so proud,” Julie said, her voice breaking a little. You looked over at her and saw that she was crying, too. 

Alex stood up. “We know how bad it hurts when someone that should’ve had your back… completely lets you down. We never meant to make you feel that way.”

“Julie, we love our band,” Reggie said, still crouching behind a plant. “And Luke does too. Please give us another chance.”

You looked back at Luke and his family one last time, noticing a bouquet of flowers on the island. You smiled to yourself. They were dahlia’s, Rose’s favorite.

-----

“Marching on proud

Turn it up loud

‘Cause now we know what we’re worth,” you and Julie harmonized.

Luke suddenly appeared in a chair. “Whoa,” he said as the music died out. Then he smiled. “Julie.”

She smiled back at him. “Grab a guitar. We got work to do.”

“What made you come back?”

“I realized how important music is to all of us. And we’ve lost so much already. We can’t lose this too.”

“Thanks,” Luke said quietly. Julie smiled at him. “Alright, boss, where we at?”

Julie smirked, taking pride in the name. “Oh, and by the way, happy birthday.”

Luke looked a little stunned, and he glanced at you. 

“Happy birthday,” you said quietly, smiling at him.

A slight blush creeped onto his cheeks. 

Julie laughed slightly. “Let’s go from the pre-chorus.”

Alex smiled. “One, two three four!”

-----

“Guys, are you sure? She’s probably just getting dressed or something,” you said as Luke, Alex, and Reggie stopped outside of Julie’s door.

Reggie smirked. “Which is why I’ll be doing this.” He stuck his arm through the door and knocked on this inside. 

You heard Julie chuckle as she called out: “What are you guys doing?”

Reggie stuck his head through the door. “We’re being classy,” you heard him say. You and Alex pulled him back. 

The four of you walked through the door.

“Why are you still here?” Luke asked. “We’re going in like, twenty minutes.”

Julie sighed. “I lied to my dad, so…  now I’m stuck in my room all night.”

“Yeah, but, we were just at the venue! I mean it’s packed, like, VIPs, managers…” Alex trailed off. “It’s kinda crazy.”

“What are we gonna do about my aunt?” Julie asked, sighing again. “She’s right downstairs.”

Luke walked over to her window, smirking as he opened it. “You’re not taking the stairs.”

Julie shook her head slightly. “Okay. Let me get dressed. I’ll meet you guys there.”

The guys all poofed out, but you stayed behind for a minute, admiring your best friend’s room. It was just so… her.

“Y/N?” Julie asked, making you jump slightly. 

“Oh, sorry, I’ll leave-” you started, but Julie cut you off. 

“No, it’s fine.” She walked over to the trunk of her mom’s clothes, pulling out a leather jacket and turquoise romper.

“So,” she started. “What’s the deal with Luke?”

You felt your face go red. “Huh?” you sputtered. “I don’t-”

“Oh come on, Y/N,” she said with a smirk. “Everyone can see the way you look at him. And the way he looks at you.”

You shook your head. “Even if I did like him, which I’m not saying I do, there’s no way he would like me back.”

Julie rolled her eyes. 

“Really Jules! I mean, look at me!” You gestured to yourself. ���I’m a mess, inside and out.”

Julie walked over to you and let her hands hover over your shoulders. “Y/N, you are one of the most beautiful people I know. Inside and out,” she smiled. 

“You really think so?” you asked. 

She nodded. You smiled. “Thanks, Jules.”

“Anytime,” she said, smiling back before putting on her outfit for the night. 

-----

“Next up, Dirty Candi,” announced the MC. 

“Am I too late?” Julie said, rushing over to where you and Flynn were standing. 

“Too early,” Flynn said, staring at the stage where Carrie was standing.

“Hope you all came to have a great time!” she said in a peppy voice. 

You glanced back and forth between Carrie and Flynn a few times. 

“Dirty Candi? How’d she get on the list?” Julie asked.

Flynn scoffed. “Her daddy probably made a call.”

You saw the way Flynn was staring at Carrie, trying to hide behind disgust. You smirked to yourself, but didn’t say anything. 

“I like this!” Flynn said, examining Julie’s jacket. “Pretty flower.” 

“Thanks. It’s a dahlia. My mom’s favorite.”

The three of you fell silent as Carrie started to sing. 

“Whenever I walk in the room

All the focus on me

The way I talk the way I move

They all want on my team.”

You rolled your eyes; it was clear that Carrie was just bragging about herself. Although you had to admit, the song was catchy and the dance moves were pretty cool. 

The guys appeared behind you, smiling as they watched the routine.

“The party don’t start ‘till I walk in

I’m stealing all the attention

Don’t get me started on mentions, yeah”

Suddenly Alex was on the stage. You and Reggie looked at each other in confusion, but Alex looked just as confused as you did. 

He quickly got over his confusion however, and he started dancing along with Dirty Candi. You laughed at his antics, making Flynn look at you in confusion.

 “Oh, it’s the guys,” you explained. 

Alex poofed back off the stage. 

“You having fun out there?” Julie asked him, laughter in her voice.

“It’s not my fault it’s my… it’s my feet.”

Julie scoffed, smiling at him. “Yeah.”

Alex grinned. “Put me back in, coach,” he muttered before appearing on the stage again.

You were thoroughly enjoying watching him dance around on stage, walking through Carrie and obviously having the time of his life. 

When the song ended, he hopped around in a little circle. “You’re making me blush,” he said, pretending the audience was clapping for him. Four members were.

He poofed back to you guys. “I um, I was just doing that for you guys.”

“Mmhmm. You can stop smiling now,” Reggie said playfully. 

“I’m not gonna lie, that was… kinda good,” Julie said. 

“Yeah.” Flynn scrunched up her nose. “I forgot why I hate her so much.”

Carrie walked up to the six of you, although to her it only looked like Julie and Flynn. 

“Hi girls!” she said brightly. “Isn’t it past your bedtime?”

Flynn turned to Julie. “Now I remember.”

“If you’re looking for Nick, he didn’t come,” Carrie said coldly.

Julie stepped up to her. “That’s not why I’m here.”

“Okay, looks like we’re closing out the night with one more group,” the MC announced. “ ‘Julie and the Fat Ones’.”

You, Alex, Reggie, and Julie all looked at Luke as Dirty Candi laughed. 

“Really?” Alex asked him.

“Yeah man, my handwriting sucks.”

Julie walked past Carrie onto the stage, the four of you following her. 

“Uh, hi, it’s actually ‘Julie and the Phantoms’,” Julie said, her voice coming up at the end of the sentence, making it sound like a question. 

“Okay,” she muttered when no one answered, and started to play the piano.

“Hearts on fire

We’re no liars

So we say what we wanna say

I’m awakened 

No more fakin’

So we push all our fears away”

You joined her, appearing on stage and taking the harmony line. The crowd gasped.

“Don’t know if I’ll make it

‘Cause I’m falling under

Close my eyes and feel my chest

Beating like thunder

I wanna fly

Come alive

Watch me shine.”

Suddenly, the boys appeared too, making the crowd gasp again.

“I’ve got a spark in me

Hands up if you can see

And you’re a part of me

Hands up if you’re with me

Now ‘till eternity

Hands up if you believe 

Been so long and now we’re finally free”

Julie smiled, letting you take the second verse. 

“We’re all bright now

What a sight now

Coming out like we’re fireworks

Marchin’ on proud

Turn it up loud

‘Cause now we know what we’re worth”

You smiled as Luke joined you.

“We know we can make it

We’re not fallin’ down under

Close my eyes and feel my chest

Beating like thunder

I wanna fly

Come alive

Watch me shine”

The five of you launched into the chorus again, Julie taking the melody. You dropped out, letting Julie and Luke sing the bridge.

“I got a spark in me

I got a spark in me

And you’re a part of me

And you’re a part of me

Now ‘till eternity

Now ‘till eternity

Been so long and now we’re finally free”

You smiled into your microphone as Julie nailed the high note, taking the melody of the chorus.

You grinned as the song came to an end, enjoying the adrenaline rush that came with singing in front of a crowd. You heard the crowd gasp again as the four of you disappeared, leaving Julie apparently alone on stage. 

“Thank you, we’re Julie and the Phantoms. Tell your friends,” she smiled before stepping off the stage. She immediately ran over to the bar area where you and Flynn were waiting.

You all squealed as they hugged each other.

“You were incredible! Both of you,” Flynn said, beaming at her two best friends.

“Yeah we were!” Reggie said as the boys appeared. 

You stood there in an excited silence for a minute more. 

“Hey, hey, whoever Carrie was trying to impress is coming this way,” Luke said suddenly. 

“Oh, it’s…” Julie trailed off as she turned around and saw the woman making her way over.

“She looks all business,” Alex said a little nervously.

“Wait, who should do the talking?” Reggie asked. Julie looked at him. “Oh, right.”

The woman stretched her hand out for Julie to shake. “Hi, I’m Andi Parker, and I’m-”

“Julie.” Andi Parker was cut off by Ray. 

“Dad!” Julie said in surprise. 

“It’s time to go.”

Tag List: @xplrreylo @ifilwtmfc @sunsetcurvej @yagorlemmalyn @caitsymichelle13 @phantompogues

add yourself to my tag list!

[olde-scratch]

So I watched LUCIDS 1-4 without any prior knowledge...

and here were my thoughts. I didn’t watch any backstory or anything so enjoy my suffering.

PART 1

“So what happens when the people inside of their dreams go to sleep?” They die

“What happens when we wake up? Do they go on living while we’re not there?” THEY DIE-

“Who are they anyway?” they’re faces that our brain catalogs and stores for later use, although it’s also arguable that every time we dream we go to an alternate reality and inhabit the body of another version of ourselves. Now, were you in a car accident and trapped underwater or-

Are they twins?

(Me tuning out to do something)

“-the squirrel in spongebob was your soulmate, making you a Sandy simp-”

Me, snapping back to the video: hold up-

[missed the part about the worksheet, realized it when i rewatched 10 mins later to make this post]

yall speakin gibberish idk what youre saying-

“I’m gonna go to bed.” bro it literally looks like morning-

“You should get some sleep you look terrible.” i get six hours of sleep a night minimum and i look worse than him shut up bro-

“jump into someone else’s dream” ah i know this con-

why they all got the same face-

haha funni meme

“--an interruptiion can create feedback and tear them apart.” Death. I long for thee.

Is that Karl Jacob’s jacket?

“a second grader” makes me think this is a different school system. [i was wrong? i think?]

“[get him to] eat your apple”

[in the dream sequence] weird dream, but ive had weirder. now, Why Pamper’s-

why does he suddenly have a knife-

“You put a filter on the Dreamscape feed?”

“Technically, you are seven years old.”

???????????

the second hand embarrassment is UGGGHHH

[reading the description] you mean like the guy who was knocked out for 2 minutes on a football field and woke to find he’d dreamt 17 years of his life? oh this shall be Fun

PART 2

[I check the description] “jasper cult” what the fu-

how many camp camp references can i make during this

Is the apple a reference to religion or does the creator just really ilke apples?

“meal.”

“meal?”

meal????

Wait why couldn’t that guy eat the apple? If he wanted it in the fruit bowl, wouldn’t there be a chance of the guy eating it anyways?? Why can’t the guy who brought the apple eat it?

well he’s Dead

[debating if I should read the backstory}

n a h h h h h -

Was he gonna feed the dead guy the apple or something? Why is he upset about the apple in this scene???

oooo the grownups are fightinnnngggg

Is he an antagonist?

HE WROTE A BOOK???

oh now i want food

ESTABLISH JUSTICE ENSURE DOMESTIC TRANQUILITYYYYYYYYYYYYY

“I watched all those aforementioned shows” what shows did i miss something what-

man why you gotta hate on her jane austen fanfic let her live bro

string theory! i can get behind that! sorta-

o no he found the memes-

BOY GOT KNOCKED OUT-

kim there’s people that are dying-

is SHE an antagonist?

quinn? calling himself jasper? u sure hes not just nonbinary? is this just a metaphor for transphobic parenting?

“He died... but somewhere, he grew up.” So is your plan to take a Quinn from a different universe and make him your own, thereby robbing another version of yourself from happiness? When does this ever go well?

Yknow most people, when they lose a kid,,,, kinda,,,,,,, dont go on a ceaseless quest to find another version of their kid that grew up without knowing that another version of his mother was invading other peoples’ dreams to find and kidnap him,,,,,,,, like aint u got a therapist-

“Once you get past the point of not knowing what’s real anymore, you realize it doesn’t matter.” Well, I Got Called Out-

PART 3

“you’re real, oliver.”

aRe yOu sUrE aBoUt tHaT-

“you’ve been infected by the anti-love parasite of Mandadon” the amatonormativity is strong

so anyways ive been infected since birth hbu-

“James Jasperson, creator of Japple” did you mean to Fancy Well-Educated Man in a Black Turtleneck? cause the only FWEMBT i allow near me is prof. hidgens

“are you winning?” says the capitalist

why did you rewind to see his face?? you have the same face????? is this just bc the creator doesnt like working with other people cause in that case same but???????

“it’s a bad idea. i’m not gonna do it.” we’ve all been there. and we’ve all done it.

looks like me trying to study. (i say, a person who has studied a total of five minutes throughout their entire life.)

your “Spartan trial” looks like a bunch of guys standing on a hill pretending to be something they’re not. Let The Man Bring His Snacks.

eat the apple.

is this your first existential crisis or something what a loser lets all point and laugh

“One of you should be spared, the other shall’nt.” did you mean shant or was that a choice-

yall gonna get called out for talking shut UP

“sorry if this is too personal, btw. are you okay?”

me, confused and half understanding what’s going on and also needing to sleep cause its almost one in the morning but wanting to finish what i can find of lucids which i only starting watching cause i saw an animatic of ranboo and dream w audio from it: i don’t know anymore

“i just want my life back... i was gonna get married-” AREN’T YOU LIKE SEVEN-

ay man if this is a sacrificial cult yall gotta get daniel-

UPDATE: I  H A V E  N O T  F O U N D  I T -

“oliver”

I  F O U N D   I  T -

WHICH ONE IS QUINN?? WHO’S JASPER???? WHICH ONE IS BENJAMIN???? I THOUGH BENJAMIN WAS SEVEN BUT I THOUGHT HE WAS THE ONE GETTING MARRIED WHAT-

oliver. eat the apple.

“Can you still have memories even when you’re dreaming?” One time I woke up to my alarm and fell back asleep and in my dream I remembered that I had class in a few minutes and my dream self woke my real self up so fast I thought I was gonna get whiplash. Anyways, I was late to class bc of my computer but that doesn’t matter.

NOPE I FOUND IT. HERE’S THE AUDIO. THE ANIMATIC ONE. FINALLY.

im thinking car crash. but also maybe murder. but also maybe both? is it raining or was he drowning? is he in a coma? hmmmmmm?

wait olivers the one with the apple does that mean he’s the one dreaming? is the ending gonna be him and jasper (quinn? idk) fighting against ben and mrs hills about jasper eating the apple to save oliver from the dream? hmmmmmmmmmm-

waitwaitwait i thought oliver was 7 how is benjamin 7 years younger than him if they look the same age what what what explain america explain what you mean arkansaw-

are the cuts on his nose plot-relevant or

“What if you hadn’t been driving?” So I was right about the car accident but Mrs. Hills still said he was seven so did i mishear her say that BENJAMIN was seven? but even then oliver would be 14 and that would still be illegal-

“How are you feeling?”

“Like you’re a pretty bad therapist.”

mood

“--it makes it all bearable to have power over the stories we write in our heads” that’s why i write fanfiction

HE’S GOT THE NOTEBOOK HE’S GONNA WRITE SOMETHING ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US

WHAT YOU MEAN AN EXPERIMENT THAT’S HIS NAME-

[upon reading the description] so i was right.

wait was that supposed to be the twist in part 2 about the apple in his pocket is that what the existential crisis was about i thought it was because he was introduced to the multiple worlds theory-

PART 4

wait wasnt the other one january 2018 why we going back to 2017-

appol

“--the future and the past all already exist” mhm yep figured this out long ago

there was simultaneously a point in time in which i hadn’t known about this, had been looking it up, had been watching it, and had been writing an ending to this post, and had been posting it the next morning before class. that time is both now and not now. Welcome To The Multiverse Theory or whatever its called-

“--my favorite scene of the movie is waking up next to you.” Mine is eating fast food as I listen to AJJ and play Minecraft. We are not the same.

Now I’m hungry but it’s 1 in the morning and i already put my retainer in god fu-

[reading description] what do you mean previously??? she did that in the first episode????????

[still on description] WHAT DO YOU MEAN WILL QUINN BITE THE APPLE AND GO TO BENJAMINS REALITY ISNT THIS OLIVERS REALITY AND HE HAS TO GET BEN TO BITE THE APPLE WHY IS APPLE CAPITALIZED IS THIS THE DOING OF THE FWEMBT

i should have watched the backstory i should have watched the backstory i should have watched the backstory i should have wa-

[description] oh ive been spelling quinn right the whole time nice

i hope she rejects you /j

WAIT BENJAMIN WAS THE ONE GETTING MARRIED TO ISABELLE

ISNT HE IN SECOND GRADE-

HE IS SEVEN YEARS OLD HOW IS HE GETTING MARRIED ARE THERE TWO BENJAMINS THAT WE’RE FOCUSING ON-

bro get out of the road ull get hit

how do you knOW WHICH ONE IS QUINN THEY ARE THE SAME PERSON-

so

wait

hills wants ben to feed quinn the apple bc in his mind, that will give hills and quinn a happy ending and she doesnt want ben to see the apple bc thats gonna mean ben will know that his reality isnt reality at all. so then oliver has to,,,, not let anyone eat his apple? he just has to wake up?

IS HILLS THE VILLAIN AFTER ALL ORRRRR

wait but if ben sees the apple wont he realize that his reality is wrong and his reality will change, making it so that hills doesnt get her son? or is there some time-based rule that says they’re only transported to the reality that the person believes at that moment? or is this another stab at the multiverse thing where an infinite amount of hills gets their happy endings while an infinite amount of hills doesnt and etc etc?

i should have watched the ba-

oooo dramatique

they’re in a time loop?

nope thats a new powerpoint

wait so theyre,,,, no-

wait-

nvm-

IS THE BEN WE KNOW AN ADULT GETTING MARRIED TO ISABELLE OR NOT-

“they were actually pretty nice” didnt they throw someone off a cliff-

oh so it got confusing THEN??? NOT BEFORE?????

“it all seemed so real.” is that Not the point of vivid REM sleep hallucinations-

is oliver gonna show ben the apple and ruin hills’ whole operation

WHO ARE ALEX AND RYAN-

“what’s 25-8″ bro dont do this to me-

yep hes gonna show the apple

ayyy the guy who stole karl jacobs jacket it back

the second hand embarrassment is back and I Hate It

all that happens in episode ONE??? bro get some better writers that is bad pacing

“it’s the best!” wait until season eight. no show has a good season eight.

quinn knows about the apple thing w the dreams and multiverse and realities dont he

YOU KILLED HIM

NOT KARL JACOBS NOOOOO HES ALREADY DIED ONCE

oliver is v relatable

wHaT iN tArNaTiOn-

lemme hear that explanaton again-

is bill cipher gonna show up? i hope bill cipher shows up. i miss gravity falls

“ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!” moooooooood

did hills murder quinn

is your family the jasper cult

TOXXIICCCCCC get that lady out of your life quinn that is so toxic

“ ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!  ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!” mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT’S THE END NO WHAT WHY NO

The Adventures of Benjamin and Oliver

he is Not Good

ope-

wait so ben is equal parts an adult AND a child?? okay that clears a lot up

I MEAN HE WAS RIGHT THO BEN U CAN’T REALLY ARGUE ON THAT-

ew get off the floor

butterfly effect, multiverse theory, memory decay, and your imagination ALL exist yall gonna ignore that cause you wanna be famous?

“We already know what the future looks like!”

aRe yOu sUrE aBoUt tHaT-

to add to the list of bad things: Cats (2019)

YA BOI THINKS IT’S NOT ALREADY FIFTY YEARS TOO LATE TO START FIGHTING CLIMATE CHANGE FFFFF

BINGO BABYYYY

get what what

what mapped-

awwwww he thinks THEY’RE creating the multiverse

you gonna dismiss the multiverse theory bc of something you created in your current reality? loooserrrrrr

ABUSE YOUR GODLIKE POWERS

she draggin that seven year old

a lot makes sense now why didnt i do this first-

Jasper

the food shortages-

bro that calculators like 90 bucks at walmart

imagine meeting a stranger and they know Everything about your life like that’s gotta be so weird

what’s even weirder is them telling you you’re the deity of a cult that sacrifices animals

THAT FOURTH WALL BREAK WAS-

KARL JACOBS IS DEAD NOOOOOO

ooohhh there’s context for that

OOOOHHHH THERE’S CONTEXT FOR THIS TOOOO

w h a t -

w  h  a  t  -

W   H   A   T   -

Conclusion:

it’s 2 in the morning and i need sleep but hOOOOO MY GODS THAT WAS GOOD IS IT OVER OR NOT IDK ANYMORE IM TIRED THAT WAS CRAZY I HOPE QUINN AND JASPER GO ON TO BE VERY GOOD FRIENDS, AND I HOPE BENJAMIN AND OLIVER STAY VERY GOOD FRIENDS AND I HOPE HILLS FINDS A THERAPIST WAS A LITTLE CONFUSING BUT I ENJOYED IT

if i dream about apples im suing /j /lh

[chaotic-noceur]

but your lies were so sweet

[ day 6 | angstageddon masterlist ]

pairing: Jack ‘Whiskey’ Daniels x reader

summary: In his time with Statesman, Jack has gone by many names. In your experience, they were all just aliases for the same liar.

warnings: false identities, lying, no fluff all angst

credits: shout out to my loves @din-damn-djarin @ezrasarm for beta reading and nudging me back into writing this! Also, some inspiration was taken from Headspace by Lewis Capaldi.

a/n: ahhh we’re almost at the end of this week of pain 😭To those of you who have been reading these every day, I applaud you for sticking with us through it all, and thank you for all the love and support! To those of you who have just found this, welcome to the angst! Once again, i apologise for the pain but this ones pretty gentle considering Javi’s....

gif by @ithinkwehitametaphor

“Just tell me why!” you begged, grabbing his hand harshly. “I just want to know why Alex.” He tugs his arm free from your grasp as he spins round to meet your gaze. “Just tell me that and I’ll-” you swallow the lump that’s forming in your throat, “tell me why and I’ll let you go.” He clenches his jaw. 

He hadn’t meant for it to go this far, hadn’t meant to hurt you. But one thing had led to another and before he knew it… he’d found himself living the life that he had always wanted. Except it wasn’t real. It wasn’t really his. Worst of all, he’d dragged you so far into his fantasy that you were bound to get caught in the crossfire when it inevitably came crashing down around him. 

“Look, sweetheart,” his shoulders drop with a sigh. “There’s something you should know.” His voice is hushed, tired. You fold your arms in an attempt to not lose your patience. “That night you and I met? That wasn’t any mistake.”

“That’s what I’m saying,” you take a step towards him and he eyes the closing of space between you. You ignore the frown forming on his face. “It’s like the stars had aligned and you waltzed into my life and I was falling for you befor-”

“No, sweetheart. You’re not hearing me.” His duffle bag falls onto the floor with a loud thump as he grasps you by the shoulders. “Our ‘accidental meeting’ was no accident.”

“Wha-”

“The night we met, the thoughtful dates, the entirety of our relationship-” he lets go of you to wave his arm out for emphasis, “it was all one big set up t’ get you t’ fall for me. It ain’t nothing personal darlin’,” he shrugs cooly, “it’s just the job.” 

The nonchalant tone in his voice makes your blood boil and you clench your fists at your sides. “What are you talking about?” 

He deliberates keeping the act up, or spinning up a new lie. Either way, the damage has been done. But the dejected look on your face, the innocent glimmer in your eyes… it stirs something in him that he doesn’t want to address. Not now. Not while he had a mission to complete. 

There’s a sinking feeling in his chest that urges him to tell you the truth. To give you some semblance of closure. You deserved that much. 

He sighs before he speaks. “My name isn’t Alex, it’s Jack.” He watches as confusion blooms across your features. “Now I can’t in good faith tell you what it is I do for a living but I sure as hell ain’t no pilot. I don’t li-”

“No.” You bring a hand up to stop him as the pieces of the puzzle start falling into place. “You told me- you- you were so-” you shake your head in disbelief as you stumble back, strings of mumbled ‘no’s falling from your lips. Your hand clutches the door handle for support. He watches as you inhale shallow breaths, your eyes darting across the floor.

“I thought you loved me,” you whisper finally. He would’ve missed it had he not been paying you so much attention. 

“I only told you what you wanted to hear darlin’.” The weight of his words crash into you with full force and you struggle to breathe. You clutch a hand to your chest, clawing at the invisible knife that’s stabbing at your heart. “You don’t know anything about me, sweetheart.”

“Stop calling me that!” You throw yourself at him and shove him hard. He stumbles into the hallway until his back hits the wall. “You have no right to call me that!” You sneer. Turning away from him, you shake your head in disgust. You pace across the walkway as you compose your thoughts.

Eventually, you stop in front of your open door as you turn your head to look at him. When you speak, there’s a calmness to your voice that makes his stomach lurch in disgust. “You talked about wanting a love that lasts. A love so strong that you would do anything to keep it but you know what?” You raise your eyebrow at him tauntingly. “A man like you?” You scoff. “You’ll never be worthy of a love like that.”

You step over his discarded duffle bag before slamming the door shut behind you. Tears well in your eyes as you lean your back against the stained wood. Your shoulders drop in defeat as you slide to the ground, silent sobs wracking through your body. You’d fallen for the ghost of a man, a creation of your imagination—of his. But why did the pain feel so real?

Through clouded eyes, the photo frame sitting on your shared bookshelf catches your attention and something in you snaps. 

You storm across the room and hurl the offensive object at the wall. The shattering of glass rings out in your ears but it’s not enough to drown out the pain in your chest. Your glare fixes onto the collection of books the pair of you had started and you grit your teeth at the sight. Angry sobs echo across your empty apartment as you yank books of the shelf. 

You want every trace of him gone.

●●●●

When Jack gets back to headquarters, he’s greeted with proud smiles and shoulder clasps. Champagne gives his usual debriefing speech but Jack can’t stop your words from echoing through his mind.

You’ll never be worthy of a love like that.

Deep down, he understands that they were words said out of anger. He wants to believe that you didn’t mean them. But a small part of him can’t help but wonder… maybe you were right. No matter what he did, he never seems to be able to save the people he loved from getting hurt. 

The truth is, he’d never meant to fall for you or to have his affections returned. But the longer his little charade went on, the more he felt himself losing himself in the make believe of it all. He hadn’t realised just how much he’d missed the feeling of redamancy until you started loving him back. 

The thrill that had shot through his body with every gentle touch you gave him. The warmth that filled his chest with every smile you sent his way. It felt like the first balmy sunbeams of spring thawing the frozen ground after a long, icy winter. He had relished in the feeling - the relief of knowing he hadn’t gone completely numb to all emotion. He got so caught up in the bliss that he almost forgot about the hurricane of deceit that loomed over his head, threatening to make landfall at any moment.  

●●●●

Years later, when his muscles are stiff and his mind heavy with the burden of past missions, he’s finally ready to surrender his code name. He’s helped bring down countless criminal organisations and he was done. He was tired of the continual fighting; tired of the secrets and lies.

He loved his job, don’t get him wrong. The Statesman gave him a home when his had been so cruelly stolen from him. They gave him a purpose when he felt nothing more than blind rage. 

But he never quite managed to quench the tiny fragment of him that longed for a normal life. A life free from the looming threat of violence and death. A life where he has a local bar & grill and they know his order off by heart. He always wondered what his happily ever after looked like. He hopes he still has the chance to find out.

The months with you feel like a distant memory now, but the emotions remain. At times, he thinks he sees your face amongst a sea of strangers. He thinks he hears your voice, lulling him to the land of dreams. He thinks he remembers the taste of your lips against his, but he can’t be sure.  

●●●●

Glancing to the numbers by the door as he crumples the sheet of paper in his grip. He straightens the leather jacket before delivering three firm knocks against the door. The silence that he’s met with allows for the doubt to sink in.

Did you even want to see him? What could he possibly say to you to make up for the hurt? What if you’ve moved on? What if this just stands to cause you more pain? What if you hate him? You have every right to hate him. He hates himself for what he did to you. 

A metallic clinking jolts him from his thoughts and he reaches instinctively for the ghost of his lasso as he turns. His breath hitches when his gaze falls on you. The expression you wear is somewhere between anger and hurt and he doesn’t know which one he hates more.

You stare at each other for a quiet moment before both attempting to speak at once. Your overlapping voices form an abrupt dissonance that startles even yourselves.

“I wanted to-”

“What are you-”  He clears his throat awkwardly and you bring your arm up, gesturing for him to continue.

“I owe you a formal explanation,” he states. You scoff quietly. He owes you a lot more than that. “Perhaps we could talk in a more… private setting” He eyes the neighbouring doors suspiciously. A raised, unimpressed eyebrow is your only response. “The things I need to say… they aren’t for the public ear.” You roll your eyes at him. There was always some secret with him. When you fold your arms across your chest, he softens. “Please.”

A part of you hates him. It wants to scream and hurl insults at him until your throat is raw. But a bigger part of you needs to know why he had left. What he’d meant when he said it was ‘just the job’. Why he’d lied to you the whole time.

There’s a slight downturn in his lips that makes the rope around your heart tighten its grip and you want nothing more than to cut yourself free. But there’s a sliver of vulnerability in his eyes that makes it difficult to hold your anger.

With a sigh, you pick your dropped keys off the floor, step around him and key the door open with more force than necessary. You hold it open for him before leaning against the other side. 

Jack looks around awkwardly as he takes in the signs of you that are scattered throughout the space. He notes the distinctive lack of him. All remnants of him had been wiped clean. Although, he supposes they weren’t really parts of him to begin with. They were parts of the man he wanted to be. The man he will never be. 

The sound of you clearing your throat jolts him from his spiralling thoughts. There’s a fire in your eyes that wasn’t there before and he shrinks back slightly, feeling painfully out of place. He can’t recall the last time he was this nervous and he shifts his weight uncomfortably. You drum your fingers impatiently across your folded arm and he inhales deeply before beginning. Come hell or high water, there was no going back now.

“M’ real name is Jack, Jack Daniels.” The drumming stops. You stare at him, dumbfounded. An incredulous laugh threatens to leave your lips - he honestly expected you to believe that that is his name? But there’s no trace of humour in his eyes so you clamp your mouth shut. “I was an agent for a secret intelligence agency known as Statesman. Now, Alex was-” he pauses as he grapples for the right words, “a made-up persona, designed to capture your interest, so to speak.” You inhale sharply, though you hide it well. He continues. “You should know, it wasn’t you that we were after. Your friends were involved with some… suspicious people and we needed t-” you hold out a hand to stop him. 

“What do you mean ‘suspicious’?” You push off the door to step toward him. “My friends aren’t criminals!” He holds his arms up in defence. 

“No, they weren’t. But they were involved with some. It made them suspects. But you…” he looks to you for permission to proceed. You nod stiffly. “You were a tough nut t’ crack. Not even our finest agents could find a damn thing about you and that made you peculiar- an anomaly.” He tilts his head towards you as if congratulating you on a feat. His voice deepens when he says, “we don’t like anomalies,” and you scoff at the tone. 

“So they sent you,” you sneered, failing to mask your appalled tone. 

“There ain’t nothing better than live intel swe-” he stops himself short. He sees the way you start recoiling from him but he keeps going. “It wasn’t supposed to go as far as it had and I truly do apologise for fooling you but we had to know you weren’t a threat.”

Your heart hammers in your chest as the pieces of the puzzle start to fall into place. Blank pieces start to fill themselves with vivid colours of truth. You were nothing but a pawn on a chessboard being manipulated. Your legs feel weak and you move to sit against the arm of the couch. He follows your movement, turning to you as you walk. There’s a distant look in your eyes and he gives you a moment for the words to sink in. 

“While the night we met may have been a setup-” he takes a hesitant step towards you and your eyes snap up to meet his, “my feelings for you were not.” You narrow your eyes at him and he stops pacing. He observes the subtle clenching of your jaw and he decides to crack open the box that he’d buried a long time ago. He needs you to see there’s a real bleeding heart beneath the facade he’d been forced to weave for you.

“I lost someone very dear to me once, a long time ago.” His gaze dances between you and the objects in the room. “I never thought I’d find someone after her. But then you-“ He stops short. Sighs. Worries his lip between his teeth for a moment before speaking. This all seems so far-fetched now. 

“You were never meant to get caught in the crossfire of all this.” His voice is but a whisper, like he was speaking a sacred confession. There’s a new note to his voice as his eyes flit back and forth between your own, as though studying them for any kind of reaction he could get. “I love you.” 

The room falls silent. Jack swears he can hear the distant ticking on a clock from deeper within your home. His heart hammers in his chest, the resonant beating echoes into his ears.

Finally, you smile. “You wanna know something?” There’s a sinister tone lacing your voice and it sends a shiver down his spine. “I never thought that a lie could sound so sweet,” you chuckle lowly, “until you opened your mouth and said you loved me.”

Jack feels his stomach lurch in response to your words. He always wondered what his happily ever after looked like. He supposes he’ll never know.

——angstageddon tag list

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[lambourngb]

Not sure if you are taking prompt buts if you are Post S2 prompt: I just want to see Alex quietly singing/humming The Song to Michael. Maybe Michael's hurt and in pain or they've both had a really emotional event happen and are totally drained from crying. I want that song to be a source of comfort. My partner isn't an amazing singer but I still find it really comforting when he sings to me and I like to think Michael and Alex eventually get to that point too.

This was a very romantic prompt nonnie! I’m afraid I was in a hurt/comfort state when I started this. Warnings: Confinement, experimentation, angst, mention of Forlex, mention of the Miluca breakup, but all is not lost.

“like a halo from a gun”

Time stopped having meaning to Michael sometime after the third week of confinement.

Guards entered his cell at random intervals, always wearing black masks and dull, badge-less armor that kept them anonymous. The first injection of the serum Helena had once used on him let him know he was probably in the hands of the real Deep Sky operation. Fighting with his fists, pulling every dirty trick he learned from his brief stint in juvie at 15, rewarded him with a broken wrist and a battered torso.

He was gifted with a soft white bandage to hold the splits of his bone together, he supposed they were too nervous to allow him with the hard plaster of a cast. The pain left him weak, tired, and finally docile as vial after vial of blood was taken from him.

At least it was just blood, and not anything more taxing, like tissue or an organ. If he survives this cell, he would have to thank Max for blowing up Liz’s lab. There was no way he could be sanguine over seeing Noah’s liver in a jar after this experience.

Worry about that later, he reminded himself. If there was a later.

No one was coming for him because no one knew he was missing. His plan had been simple, shared with Isobel, Max and Sanders. A month long road trip to get some space from Roswell, and Max’s moping over Liz’s departure seemed like a good idea at the time, and if he by chance he ended up in California to plead his brother’s case, well, seeing the Pacific Ocean felt like a thing to do.

The open road with his window down had beckoned. He had let the wounded feelings from Maria blow away with his mixed emotions about Forrest, stitching up the raw places inside in ways he knew alcohol couldn’t and acetone shouldn’t. As he drove, he had found himself humming Alex’s song, reminding himself of the promise of the future.

It was not their time now, but it would be one day had been his mantra.

Three hours later, feeling lighter and more hopeful, he had pulled over to assist a stranded motorist. A mother, holding a baby at her hip, had seemed harmless enough until she hit him with a needle pulled from an innocuous diaper bag.

His powers gone, he had made it back to his truck just in time for three black Jeeps with weapons mounted to appear from the surrounding brush to pin him down. Surrender or death, he picked surrender. He picked hope.

Now, his wrist screaming with a swollen hot feeling, he considered the idea that he might have picked the wrong option. Michael shut his eyes, letting the siren song of fatigue, despair and pain drag him down to sleep. He found a brighter, happier place to be, deep inside his mind. Perhaps it was his body shutting down, or perhaps he had found the place his mother described to Tripp. The ultimate sanctuary from pain and fear.

There was a kinship believing that his mother found the same haven, where maybe her Manes man had waited for her the way Alex waited for him in the dream. The only dark he could find there, were Alex’s warm eyes, and the only touch he could feel was Alex’s broad hands. After three bags of blood drawn, he could sometimes hear Alex’s voice, whispering soft promises to him.

Together we could quiet all the noises

Drown out the voices

Play our own song

He could still hear Alex’s voice, as he slowly surfaced from his mind. It didn’t make any sense to his sluggish thoughts. The song kept up, and the next thing he was aware of was the slow, carding of his hair and the warmth under his face of his pillow. Except he didn’t have a pillow.

Blinking he met the bruised, worried face of Alex. He would never hallucinate Alex with a mark on his face, let alone darkening blemish on his cheekbone and worrying cut that bled sluggishly from his forehead creeping upward to his hairline. “You’re actually here?”

“Yes,” Alex confirmed.

“Why? How-”

“The ‘how’ is Maria had a vision not long after you left, and once she figured out that you were in trouble, she had me try to track your phone.”  Alex frowned faintly, his touch never wavering as he smoothed back the matted and sweat-crusted locks of hair. “We found your truck at used car dealer a few miles from the last cell tower you pinged. It was all hands on deck to find you after that.”

Very little of his words registered on Michael. He was too caught up in the  cringing horror at their close proximity, as his mind moved on from the fantasy of seeing Alex to the reality of his current condition. He wanted to pull away because god only knew how badly he smelled at the moment. Bathing consisted of a blast of a hose, bracingly cold and relying on the force of the water to wash away the dirt and fear-sweats he routinely suffered. All of that said, he never wanted to leave the place on Alex’s lap. Being treated like a person after 3 weeks of nothing but sterile touch undid all his work at detachment.

Unaware of the train of Michael’s thoughts, Alex continued in a soft voice, “I  should have looked sooner, but- anyway, I didn’t even know you guys had broken up. Actually, I didn’t even know you left town until Maria came to my house looking for you.”

The blood loss was making him stupid as he tried to figure out what made Maria think he was at Alex’s. It was still too painful to even think about how he had failed with her, did she really think he would seek out the other person who knew how inadequate he was when it came to a relationship? As free and relaxed as Alex was at the Wild Pony, with Jesse in the ground, why would he want to ruin that?

Michael was well aware of how stuck he was emotionally, in all the ways that seemed to matter to people, and Alex had evolved past him. Tired, he squeezed his dry eyes shut tightly. “Why your house?”

“Her visions of you all involved me. In various positions she said?”

It took a second to comprehend Alex’s admission before Michael briefly wished that his captors would return. Getting drained to light-headed weakness was preferable to this. The mental retreat he had built where he inserted Alex into his delusion of a happily ever after had more windows instead of privacy doors. He had been broadcasting to his ex-girlfriend. Fuck his life. 

“Oh god- I’m so sorry, I just, I was trying to-.”

“Hey, hey,” Alex cut him off, his eyes kind as always even as Michael struggled to keep from crying. It was definitely time to wish for more needles, for more medical experimentation. That felt kinder than this discussion for Michael.

Sensing that hovering stab of humiliation, Alex made his own confession in return in the quiet, “After my leg, when rehab sucked. I pictured things being different too, or I thought about that summer with you. You don’t have to apologize, not to me.”

“Still, if she had put on the damn bracelet-” Mortified and weak, Micheal turned his face toward Alex’s hip, hiding it from view.

“Well the fact she wasn’t wearing the bracelet worked out in your favor. It’s how we realized you were in trouble in the first place, since she came over to my house to yell at you to stop projecting at her. She didn’t think it was deliberate either. She thought we had gotten back together, and because of your past with her, that you had left some link open by accident.”

“Bet Forrest loved that, my ex-girlfriend yelling at you about your- about me.”

Alex’s hand paused, either at the barb or the course correction Michael made in describing himself. For all the use of past tense feelings, the closest he’d heard Alex come to naming him was ‘first love’.

“Sorry,” Michael whispered, as a wave of shame swelled. “Sorry for that, and sorry that you’re here with me now. You shouldn’t have come but I know why you did. Guess that means we’re even now.”

“Of course I came, and it had nothing to do with being even.”

“Right, you don’t want to keep score anymore.”

Alex pinked a little at the reference to his song, before nodding seriously, “Yes, remember how the rest of the song goes?” He let his eyes track to the corner of the cell where the video surveillance was mounted plainly without subterfuge. “Would you meet me in the middle,” he sang sweetly, nodding toward the left wall of the cell, “Could we both stop keeping score? There’s a battle I must fight along, it’s you I’m fighting for. If I call on my battalion, break down the walls stone by stone, tear down the defenses, I could build our heart a home?”

Goddamnit. That crazy, brave, genius bastard really did have a plan. Michael was ready to both kiss and strangle Alex after that. 

The building shook briefly, rocked by a far off explosion. Michael summoned the reserves of his energy, and moved with Alex’s body as they rolled toward the wall. Then all hell started to break loose. The battalion mentioned was not just metaphorically tearing down walls. In the midst of deafening blasts and new alarms wailing in response, he found Alex’s ear. “I want to come home to you, that’s all I want, just when I’m ready.”

“That’s all I want too.”

[cherryblossomflowers]

hi!! i have a request... I’ve been kinda watching the sad spn episodes lately, don’t ask why. 😂 I was wondering if you can write platonic pairing with dean. instead of dean dying to metatron it can be a named reader? if not that’s fine, her name would be Alex. love your writing and can’t wait to see more and your new series you writing right now!!! 💗💗 :)

I’m Proud of Us

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Platonic!Alex (OC)

Summary: Dean watches as Metatron takes one last swing at Alex. Her last breath, her last words, her last everything in this world as Dean cries over her.

Warnings: Spoilers Season 9, Death, Blood, Cursing

A/N: I had to watch a few clips from the Season 9 finale (it's been a while y'all), but I think I got it down pretty well. I kept it to where Dean still has the Blade and the Mark, but hopefully this version is alright. My ask box is now EMPTY so please feel free to send me more! Feedback is greatly appreciated! Enjoy!

Dean: 36 Sam: 32 Alex: 34

Here is the YouTube clip and script I used: http://www.supernaturalwiki.com/9.23_Do_You_Believe_in_Miracles%3F_(transcript) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=URfZg0LvTb4

***ASK OPEN***

*LET ME KNOW IF YOU’D LIKE TO BE TAGGED*

Cherry Blossom Asks Masterlist

Metatron throws Alex against the back wall. She hit with a thud and fell to the ground. Metatron then kicked the angel blade from her hand and watches it fly across the floor. Then he stepped on her wrist and laughed when she yelled out in pain.

"So, Dean takes off Abaddon's scalp, and you figured you'd take on little old nebbishy me. What could go wrong?" Metatron laughed.

Alex groaned in pain as Metatron's foot crushed down on her wrist, "Bite me, asshat," she growled.

"And you think Dean, powered by the bone of a jackass, would just run in and rescue you? It is just awesome, right? Here's a tip: next time, try to be powered by the word of God," Metatron finished by kicking Alex in the chest.

Just then, Dean ran into the homeless encampment. Homeless guardians ran up at him as he pulled out the First Blade, ready to fight them off.

"Back off!" he yelled, "Where's Metatron? Where's Alex?!"

In the warehouse behind the encampment, Metatron is beating everything out of Alex. She is almost unconscious as she falls to the ground. Blood is pouring out of her mouth, nose, and ears.

Metatron bent down and delivered one last blow to Alex's face. Now barely conscious, Alex looks down and sees the angel blade sitting on the ground just a few feet away. She uses the bit of strength she has left in her and grabs the blade.

Dean rushes around the corners of the warehouse, searching for Alex. With every corner, he seems to feel more lost than before. As he turned the last corner, he saw Alex turning to lift the blade up.

But he was too late.

Metatron grabs the angel blade from Alex and stabs her deep in her chest. Both of his hands pushing as hard and fast as possible to kill her quicker. A gasp escapes Alex's lips as blood begins to pour out of her chest.

Dean's screams echoed off the walls, "NO!"

Metatron smiles as he slowly pulls the angel blade from Alex's chest. Her near lifeless body falls over as Dean rushes over and kneels next to her. Metatron stands over them both, chuckling menacingly.

Dean pulls Alex up to a sitting position, "Hey. Hey, hey Alex. Alex, look at me."

Alex weakly lifts her eyes over to Dean, a small smile across her lips. Dean glares up at Metatron and stands up. He pulls out the First Blade and swings at him, missing entirely as Metatron disappears into thin air.

Dean puts the Blade on the ground and scrambles to pull a bandana out of his jacket. He presses it to Alex's chest wound.

Alex coughs weakly, "Dean, get out of here...he'll come back...and go for you next."

Tears filled Dean's eyes, "No, shut up. Just don't talk right now. Save what energy you have left," the tears began to spill over, "You're going to be okay. We'll find a doctor or some spell. Sam can find something for us at the bunker. Everything will be fine, I promise."

Dean grabs Alex's hand and presses it to the cloth on her chest. Then he pulled Alex's arm over his shoulder and grabbed her around the waist, helping her up. Alex groaned in pain with every little move.

"Dean, listen to me," Alex whispered.

"Don't talk, Alex," Dean growled.

Dean was practically dragging and carrying Alex out of the warehouse, trying to keep her upright. She was gasping for air and losing so much blood. Her hand is slowly sliding off her chest, so Dean places his own hand on hers to keep the cloth in place.

"Dean?"

"What?"

"I thought you were okay with me going after Metatron," Alex looked up at him.

Dean sighed, "I was wrong. I lied."

Alex chuckled weakly, "Ain't that a bitch?"

Dean and Alex are struggling to find the exit. Once again, with every turn of a corner, Dean is more lost than before. He can feel Alex getting slower and slower.

"Dean, hold up. Wait a second," Alex begged.

Dean helps her sit down on a piece of equipment. There is fresh blood covering Alex's lips. She can barely breath.

"I need to say something to you," she whispered.

Dean was trying to hold her upright, "What?"

Alex lays a hand on Dean's shoulder before moving it up to his face, "I'm proud of you and Sam," she coughed, "You two have saved the world so many times. And I'm grateful I was able to take a few hits for you to keep going. Thank you...for...everything..."

Dean had tears pouring down his face as he watched the life drain away from Alex's eyes. Her hand fell from his face as her eyes closed and she fell on to Dean's chest.

Panic fell over Dean as he pulled Alex back up and held her bloody face in his hands, "No, no! Hey, Alex. Wake up. Alex, please!"

But it's too late.

Alex was gone.

Dean continued to gently shake Alex, trying to wake her, "Alex. Alex? Alex?!"

Sobs wracked Dean's body as he broke down. He held Alex's head to his chest, holding on to her tightly as his sobs echoed throughout the warehouse.

------------------------------

Masterlist

My Cherry Blossoms

@mlovesstories @adorable-minibot @chessurkait

@idksupernatural @desiredposion @thevelvetseries @let-me-luve-you

@obsessedwithfandomsx @mangueweaschester @starchildwild @deans-baby-momma

@spnbaby-67 @unicornmadness2444

@emery--nicole--morrison @spnfamily-j2 @akshi8278

@wecantgiggleitsafandom

[fan4196]

Emergency Contact (Part 2)

Hey everyone, here's part 2 of the HAPPY FREAKIN' HALLOWEEN JOLEX FIC CHALLENGE, (a day late but better late than never, right?) so here's some Jolex fluff for you. Hope you like it. Enjoy!

Thank you again @angry-slytherin 🧡

-

After a sleepless four hour flight Alex doesn't even think about going to Mer's house first. He has to see her. He has to see her chart, see all the test they did, he has to see that there's still hope. Because even though he hasn't seen her in two years and hasn't been sure if coming here was the right decision, he can't let her die. He still cares so much about her, she's for sure still one of the most important persons in his life; that will probably never change. She made him to what he's today.

The drive to he hospital felt like hours, his thoughts racing through his brain, never letting him come to rest.

Sprinting into the hospital, he immediately makes his way to the ICU, calling Mer while he waits for the elevator to get him to the right level, but she's not answering, even though she promised to stay with Jo as long as he's on his way. So he askes a nurse for Jo's room and finally almost 24 hours after getting the call from Mer, he sees her. Lying in a hospital bed, in one of those awful gowns, connected to all those machines, eyes closed like she's just sleeping peacefully, still looking flawless as ever. She had been stabbed five times and barely survived her surgery, but she still looks so perfect. Alex pushes his suitcase into the corner of the room and pulls the chair closer to the bed. Grabbing her hand, he's immediately relieved that it's still warm.

An hour after he arrived Mer finally shows up to check on Jo and tries to convince Alex to come home with her but he's not going anywhere. Not anymore. He's done running, leaving people he loves. He will stay until she wakes up, no matter how long it will take.

+

Like all the mornings before Alex wakes up on the uncomfortable hospital chair today as well. Covered in this scratchy blanket that he got from one of the nurses, facing the wall, still holding Jo's hand in his. He's not quite awake yet when he feels a thumb stroking over his hand, playing with the wedding ring he never took of.

"Oh my God, Jo." He whispers immediately wide awake, turning towards her. Looking into her eyes for the first time after what felt like an eternity, he can finally breathe again. She's awake. She's alive and breathing. She can hate him, be angry, he would even let her punch him, he doesn't care, she's alive, nothing else matters.

+

After getting her checked out, they sit together and talk for hours. Alex tells her the whole story about his kids turning out not being his kids and he apologizes a million times.

"You know now that I'm awake you can finally go take a shower." Jo teaes him with a laugh.

"Are you saying that I stink?" He fakes a sulky face and crosses his arms over his chest.

"Yes Alex!" Jo laughs.

"Well three days of anxiety sweat do that to you. And you know who's fault that is." He shrunks his shoulders, holding back a smile.

"Oh now it's my fault that you stink like a thirteen year old teenager." Now Jo's the one playing sulky but laughs immediately. "No. But I'm serious, Alex. You should go take a shower, change your clothes, than you can come back. I promise I won't go anywhere." She jokes.

Convinced by her smile he agrees. Squeezeing her hand a last time he stands up and grabs his suitcase. With a last glance at her he leaves.

As he leaves her room, he spottes Mer at the nurse desk so he walks towards her.

"Hey Mer. Could I go take a shower at your place?" He asks, interrupting her tipping on the tablet.

"Sure. My keys are in the attendings lounge. My car keys are there too, you can take it instead of calling a taxi- Are you even listening?" She follows Alex sign, seeing Link walking out of the elevator with a little boy and a girl on his hands, towards Jo's room. They disappear in said room, which makes  Alex walk towards the room too, but he gets hold back my Mer grabbing his arm.

"What do you think you are doing?" She asks him, placing herself in front of him, holding him back from storming into this room.

"This were Jo's children, right? She concealed them from me. I- just I-" He can't even express what he is feeling right now. She did it too. She did the exact same thing as Izzie and kept his kids from him. He can't even believe it. They talked for almost four hours and she didn't even mention kids. He has to talk to Jo immediately. He pushes Mer to the site, about to storm the room again, but Mer holds him back again.

"They are not yours, Alex! Yes they are her kids but they are not yours."

This sentence hits him like a knife in the heart. She has kids with someone else. More important she has someone else. A new man that loves her. Of course he wanted that for her, to be happy again, but that was before he discovered that his kids weren't his.

"You know Jo. You know that she would never do that. She would never keep away your kids from you. Also do the math, you left two years ago and they are three. How should that work, ha? She adopted them." Alex immediately relaxes. "They are twins and she's raising them alone. So no they are not yours and there's also no new man in her life, because you ruined her." Mer complains, pointing her finger at him. "She tried dating but it never worked. So calm down and go to my house. Take a shower, put on some new clothes, than you can come back an talk to Jo. But for now, go!"

+

The hot water is burning on his skin as he stands in the shower in Mer's house. Thinking about everything that happened in the last hour.

She's a mother. Jo has children. Children that aren't his and he knows that he should be happy for her but he's sad. He always thought that he would be the father of her children. Every time he looked into his future he saw Jo. He saw himself and Jo surrounded by their kids and grandkids. Teasing each other and eating donuts until they die in each other's arm. He never saw him leaving her. He never saw a divorce or her with other children than his. It's so selfish of him to think all of this but he can't stop. He can't stop seeing everything that could have been. Everything he ruined the day he left. To be with kids that aren't his. He left the love of his life. He has missed Jo every day, but thought he did the right thing being with his kids, until one day during a rutine checkup of the twins he discovered that they aren't his. That Izzie lied to him, just to get him back. Since that day he has thought about coming back to Seattle every day. But he couldn't.

After his shower and changing into new clothes he makes his way back to the hospital as fast as he could. Even though he is not Jo's husband anymore, he still cares. He cares so much about her and nothing will ever change that. She's his best friend, his soul mate and even a divorce can't break that. He rounds the corner to Jo's room as Link leaves the room. Walking closer he can watch her through the window. Sitting on her hospital bed. Changed into some comfy clothes instead of this ugly hospital gown. Her daughter snuggled into her site while they read a book. Her son kneeling on the chair beside the bed, playing with a blue racecar on the bed beside Jo. She looks like a natural. As if being a mother has always been her destiny. He knows that she for sure is the most wonderful mother to those two. He had always known that, he always knew that one day she would be an awesome mom.

His thoughts get interrupted by Jo spotting him staring through the glas, waving at him to come inside.

"Hey." She greets him as he finally walks into the room.

"Hi." He replies with a smile. Her kids stop what they're doing and stare at him.

"Guys can you say hi to mommy's friend Alex. Can you tell him your names?" She asks her kids with a smile, stroking their little heads.

"Parker." The boy says shyly hiding his face in his mothers armpit. Alex can immediately tell that he's a sweet little boy, with big blue eyes and dark brown curls.

"I'm Emery." The girl answers more confident than her brother. There's a big proud smile on her face after she told Alex her name. Her light brown, long curls shake when she looks up to her mother, who smiles down on her kissing her forehead. She's a little tougher than her brother and probably also a little wilder.

"Hi Emery, hi Parker. I'm your mommy's friend Alex." He greets the twins, giving both a high five as he walks closer. "I like your car, Parker. I had one just like that when I was younger. And your dress is very nice Emery. Blue is my favorite color." Alex tells them with a sympathetic smile.

"Parker come here, let Alex sit in the chair." Jo patts on the bed next to her.

"Oh no I should probably go anyway." He says and is about to leave the room again when he gets interrupt.

"We can share mister Alex." Parker tells him, scooting a little to the side to make room for Alex on the chair.

"That's so nice of you, baby." Jo praises her son, stroking his hair, while he grinns widely, left from all the shyness he showed just a few minutes ago.

"Look now there's space for you. My mommy says I have a little booty so-"

"Parker!" Jo disciplines her son but has to laugh.

Alex has to chuckle too on the comment of the little boy.

"Well, your booty may be little but look at mine. I have a big booty so I don't think we will fit both on the chair. But thank you for the offer, mister Parker."

Alex comment now making the little boy chuckle.

"You are funny, Mister Alex." He giggles. "You could also let me sit on your lap, you know?"

"If you want that."

The little boy nodds with a smile. So Alex picks him up and puts him on his lap, as he sits down on the chair.

...

-

@doc-pickles @odd-birds-and-booksellers

[halfway-happyyy]

Random but I was about to be an aunt. My sister in law was 3 months into her pregnancy but it had to be interrupted... As I'm grieving I wish I had Alex to talk to. This is dumb but I think I'm in dire need of softness. Being listened, being cared about/for. Idk if this is even an okay request or if you're comfortable with it, but I was wondering if you could write something? Idk, I'm sorry. Please don't feel pressured to do so. I'm also sorry to dump this on you, just needed to say it. -A🖤

Hello sweet A. I wanted to start by saying that I am truly sorry for what you’re going through right now. Such a heartbreaking situation to be in, and my heart goes out to you (and your family) so much. Please don’t ever be sorry or afraid to drop something on me- my inbox is literally always open to anyone (I may be a little slow to respond) but I see you guys, and I appreciate you all so much. I want my blog to be a safe space for anyone here, because I think it’s important. I am putting what I wrote beneath a readmore because it contains some pretty heavy subject matter. If you are uncomfortable with it at all, please let me know, and I can remove it. I am honoured that you chose me to share with, and I am around if there is anything else I can do for you. Much love, friend.

tw: miscarriage 

“Close your eyes and remember this moment forever.”

Occasionally, there were fragments in life that begged to be committed to memory. She had not experienced very many of them to date, but the night that she met Alexander, he had whispered that very sentence to her and she had never forgotten it. Three and a half months ago, she had been seated adjacent to him at one of their favourite brunch haunts downtown. God, if she just closed her eyes, she could still see everything so clearly- as if it had happened yesterday and not over a hundred days ago. She could still hear the muted classical music floating in on the warm breeze from the restaurant, and the cacophonous clatter of ceramic plates and metal utensils as waiters bustled by in the background. She could still see the half empty glass of orange juice in front of his empty plate, the opaque flecks of pulp pasted to the rim of the glass. Of all her favourite views in the universe, closest to the top had to have been Alexander. And he could be doing anything, really. Whether he was seated cross-legged at the kitchen table, his blue gaze scanning the weathered pages of a coffee-stained script, or whether he was next to her at a concert, the live band loud, and the deep crinkles next to his eyes telling of his palpable happiness. It did not matter what he was doing, she was simply grateful to have someone to touch, to look at, to love. She could still feel the buzz of the phone next to her, signaling an incoming message. She had glanced down at the name on the screen and frowned to herself, running a finger over the glass and opening the text message fully. She peered down at the cellphone in her hand for what felt like hours, the words on the screen finite but still somehow otherworldly and slightly hard to believe.

“What is it, kid? Everything okay?” Alexander had asked.

She swallowed hard; a small smile pulled at the edges of her lips. “They’re uh… they’re pregnant, Alex.” She lifted her gaze to his, her unbridled happiness utterly contagious, and soon his elation matched that of her own. There had been no need to ask who the joyous news belonged to; her partner had known the moment that she uttered it, but even he could not know how her heart skipped a beat at the thought of the role she was about to play in a little one’s life.

“You’re going to be an Auntie…” Alexander had murmured, his voice breathless with joy. He held her to him that evening, as she spoke at length of the plans she envisioned for her future niece or nephew. She had drifted to sleep hours later with her much smaller hand entwined with his own, and to his soft, whispered voice saying,

“Close your eyes and remember this moment forever.”

And then one evening about a week ago, while she was at a private function with Alexander, she received a series of phone calls. She had managed to miss the first two, the collective chatter from the people around her had helped to drown the sound of her ringer out completely, and she only noticed the missed calls when she excused herself to use the washroom. The third call came in while she was fixing her dress, and she answered on the second ring. “Hello?” Something unbearably painful lingered in the silence. She pressed a finger over her ear to hear better. “Hello?” She asked again and heard only muffled sobbing in response. “Please try to calm down, I can’t understand you...” She implored the person on the other end of the line. Finally, a single sentence was uttered over the crackle of the phone wire, and her phone fell from her slipping grasp, landing in the sink below her with a resounding clank. Exiting the safety of the washroom, she stumbled back out into the heavily crowded room; her gaze was blurry with saltwater as she searched desperately for Alexander in the mass of bodies. She found his imposing figure at the bar, awaiting a drink, and tugged on his cuff-linked sleeve wordlessly.

“Ah, there you are kid. I was just about to send-” His voice faltered as he took note of her stoic figure. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

She swallowed hard and shook her head. Tears were moments away from breaking free of their dam and cascading down her face without pause. “We need to leave, Alex.”

His blue eyes widened in worry. “What is going on?”

She shook her head again. “We have to leave. Now. Please.” Her voice was pleading, and instead of waiting for a response from him, she turned on a heel and made for the exit. Once outside, she hugged her arms tight to her frame and slid down the side of the brick wall, resting her forehead against her knees. She tried to take deep, measured breaths to keep from hyperventilating and shivered only slightly in the balmy, mid-October air. Alexander joined her moments later, both of their coats slung over his forearm, a look of extreme concern etched across his features.

Crouching down in front of her, he placed a warm hand over her bare shoulder. “Will you tell me what’s going on?” She had been about to say something when a car horn blared in the distance and their taxicab pulled up to the curb before them. “Come, love. Let’s get you home.” He held her to him as she cried nearly all the way home, his warmth like a weighted blanket around her. “What happened, kid?” He whispered when there was a momentary intermission in her tears.

“She lost the baby.”

Those words hung suspended in the air above them like a dark raincloud. She had weathered storms before- but never anything remotely close to this magnitude. “Oh, my sweet girl…” Alexander held her tighter to him as he pressed a tender kiss to the top of her head. “I am so sorry.” She stayed like that for the remainder of the ride home, her head tucked firmly beneath his chin, tears flowing freely down her now-raw cheeks. When the vehicle glided to a halt in front of their home fifteen minutes later, Alexander handed over a wad of cash and told the driver to keep the change. If she had to think back on it now, the time between when she exited the vehicle, entered the house, and made her way to the safety of her bedroom, was totally blank. It could not have taken more than ten minutes but try as she might, those ten minutes had dissipated for good with no hope of ever recovering them. “Let me help you…” Alexander had murmured when he joined her moments later in their room. She stood motionless in front of their expansive mirror, her eyes bloodshot and exhausted. He stood behind her and reached with warm fingers for the zipper at the base of her neck. He made quick work of undressing her and watched the expensive material pool at the bottom of her feet. Wordlessly, he unclasped her bra and hung it over the back of the chair adjacent to them. “One of mine?” He whispered.

She nodded her head. “Please.”

Alexander turned and made for the walk-in closet, to his clothes that were hung to the left of where hers were. He felt around for the familiar material of one of his worn t-shirts and produced it from the middle of the rack, returning to where she was still stood. “Arms up,” He whispered, and watched as she did as she was told wordlessly. He fitted the t-shirt down over her body, watched it settle just above the top of her knee. He closed the distance between them and wrapped his warm arms around her waist, his chin resting softly in the crook of her shoulder. Their eyes met in the mirror and he asked her, “Would you like to talk about it?”

Her gaze fell from his and she tugged her bottom lip between her teeth, the familiar prickle of tears stabbed threateningly behind her eyes. “Not tonight.” She was not yet sure if it was something she ever wanted to talk about- it was a grief so intense in measure that she felt she lacked the proper words to describe it. To have something so tangible ripped from your grasp without warning… she could hardly bear it. “I want to lay down.” She pulled away from his embrace to stumble over to the bed. It had yet to have been made from that morning still, but she hardly cared. She climbed into it wordlessly and pulled the weighted blanket up over her body, hoping that sleep would come for her soon. She felt his side of the bed dip under his weight a few moments later, heard the rustle of the blanket as it was pulled back to allow him to slide in.

“May I hold you?” He asked, quietly.

She swallowed hard; her throat had been scratchy from the onslaught of tears. “Yeah.”

He shimmied up behind her and folded his long legs up behind her own, and together they laid like that for what seemed like hours. When she continued to stir against him, he whispered to her a folktale in his native tongue- something he had been in the habit of doing whenever she had had a rough time getting to sleep in the past. It worked. She had been able to drift into a fitful slumber, but 6:45 am came early, and with that consciousness came a tidal wave of despair and she did not have the energy to fight. She cried until she could no longer breathe through her nose, and resorted instead to taking deep, gulping breaths. She closed her eyes and tried to will herself to get a proper breath in, as Alexander stirred behind her. “Woah, woah… it’s okay, kid.” His voice was raspy and bore the heavy weight of recent sleep. “Come here, you.” He whispered and reached for her, scooping her up into his arms and falling back to rest against the solid oak headboard.

“It hurts, Alex…” Her fragile voice teetered precariously on the edge of breaking.

He held her head to his chest as he cradled her in his arms and rocked her back and forth in a slow, steady motion. “Shh, I know, baby. I know it hurts,” He kissed the top of her head tenderly. “You just feel everything you need to feel, hm? I’ll be right here with you.” He caressed a warm palm to the apple of her cheek and swiped stray tears away with the pad of his thumb. “I’ll always be right here.” He held her like that until morning dawned, and an October sun had begun to pour in through the crack in the linen curtains, shining beams of light over pieces of her disheveled hair. Alexander rubbed reassuringly circles into the soft skin of her arm and placed a series of feather-light kisses over her neck and shoulder. “I won’t let you bear the weight of this alone, my love,” He let the silence collect between them before he cleared his throat. “And I won’t force you to talk about anything you don’t want to, but I need you to know that you are not in this alone.”

“Close your eyes and remember this moment forever.”

And she would. She figured that she would remember the precise feeling of the pain for the rest of her life; how it felt so much like literal heartbreak, that she was scared she would succumb to it at any moment. But she would also remember the immense amount of love that she felt for Alexander; for the immense amount of love that he poured into her, and how grateful she was just to have him around in some of the darkest moments of her life.

[soukoku-rivals]

Summary

My darlings, it’s been over two years and we’re done with 2 part out of 3 of this comic. And I am amazed that I actually got this far, that you got this far. Really, without your support, all the comments, likes and reblogs, and of course the coffee, it wouldn’t be possible.

There is only one last part of this comic left - 3 chapters and an epilogue. But before that happens, you voted to the summary so here it is!

It’a very short and I probably skipped some parts one may consider more important than others but I hope it still serves it purpose.

Read under the cut!

Atsushi and Dazai go to a shopping mall where they meet Chuuya. Chuuya is angry at Dazai [as always] but he puts his feelings aside when the mall is attacked by a small gang aiming to rob the patrons. All three of our heroes need to work together in order to stop the bad guys.

Atsushi is amazed at Soukoku’s partnership and Chuuya ends up giving him a few helpful tips on how to fight. Chuuya also identifies the gang as the Wolf School whose leader is a Polish ability user, Sapkowski. The knowledge comes in handy when Dazai and Atsushi come back to the agency and it turns out that the Wolf School not only aimed to rob the shopping mall but also kidnapped a person.

The person kidnapped is Alexandre Dumas, a French ability user with the skill of The Three Musketeers which allows him to see what abilities other people have, can amplify them through touch or contact with his blood and can make regular people physically stronger. His partner, John Locke hires the agency to get him back.

It is again Dazai and Atsushi together on a mission and they meet Chuuya once more, deciding to join forces. This time Atsushi is supposed to join the shorter part of Soukoku and retrieve Dumas first before Chuuya destroys the Wolf School gang. Dazai hangs back.

Chuuya and Atsushi talk about Dazai and how Chuuya hates the other man for always manipulating and using other people. For manipulating and seemingly not caring about mafia while he seems to care about the agency. Atsushi still believes that Dazai is a good person but the conversation is cut short when Chuuya reminds them they have job to do.

They manage to find Dumas after killing two gang members guarding a room. Dumas is unconscious and Atsushi has to carry him out. On their way, however, they are discovered by other members of the gang members and this is when the fight starts.

Sapkowski is an ability user who can turn into mythological and fictional monsters with the help of his skill, The Witcher. However, using Dumas’ blood he amplifies his power and turns all his people into monsters and himself into a dragon.

At disadvantage with Dumas unconscious and needing protection, Atsushi and Chuuya hide when Dazai comes back with Akutagawa as the cavalry. Shin Soukoku face the enemy while Chuuya and Dazai have a talk about how Dazai manipulated Chuuya again with Dumas – kidnapping people and imprisoning them for fun seems to be a sensitive topic for Chuuya.

Before Dazai manages to say something in reply, Akutagawa gets badly hurt and then Dazai falls unconscious after a hit in the head. With three people down, and only Chuuya and Atsushi able to fight, Chuuya decides to take a drastic step. He tells Atsushi to get the other three out into safety while he himself activates Corruption to fight off the enemy after bestowing his hat to Akutagawa.

Dazai wakes up while Atsushi is already out with all of them and manages to get to Chuuya before he dies from overusing his power.

In the mafia infirmary Chuuya remembers how Dazai always used to be there for him after using Corruption, even gifting him with his iconic blue gem bolo tie that’s supposed to symbolize how Dazai will always love Chuuya and won’t let him die. Until one day Dazai is gone and so is the tie. Though Dazai seems to be wearing it now, and what does that mean for Chuuya? However, Kouyou is there this time, ready to comfort him.

Back at the Agency, Locke is there to pick up his partner. As it turns out, he has an ability as well and with it he can take away people’s memories. He erases all memory of Dumas’ power from the agency minds, unknowingly leaving out Dazai, who is unaffected for obvious reasons.

At night Chuuya decides to get rid of the remnants of Wolf School where he meets Locke. He figures out what Dumas’ power is and Locke says he has no choice but to take Chuuya’s memories as well. Locke’s power, Tabula Rasa, wipes the mind completely without Dumas’ The Three Musketeers to control it better and so Chuuya ends up as a blank slate.

Locke tries to get him back to the agency but on his way Chuuya is intercepted by an unknown person working for Fyodor while Dazai watches from the window, having no idea what just happened.

Later, Locke has nightmares caused by Chuuya’s memories and figures out his partner and Chuuya grew up in the same facility. He is in trouble for hurting his partner’s childhood not-friend.

[That was only part 1, this is so long, and I skipped so much, I’m sorry]

Part 2 starts with a flashback of how Chuuya and Dazai first met, Dazai already thinking about suicide and Chuuya desperate to have a happy life. They fight.

In the present, Dumas and Locke arrive at the agency hoping to find Chuuya there but mysteriously he’s not. Dazai invites them for a coffee to talk things through. This is when Dumas finds out what Locke already knows – Dazai is immune to abilities – and Dazai finds out that Locke and Dumas are members of Trickters, ability group specializing in mind control. While trying to contact Chuuya, Kouyou tells them he is missing.

Atsushi gets called over to test if Locke can actually bring memories back – he can – and to bring the footage of CCTV recording from when Chuuya was seen last outside the agency. Dumas identifies the man who took him as Mikhail Bulgakov, another ability user with the power of The Master and Margarita, which marks one person as the ‘Master’ and other as ‘Margarita’ and makes Margarita believe in every word the Master says and support them.

[This never came up but this is as good place as any to point out, I never said Alex can tell a person’s name just by looking at them. Bulgakov is actually a member of the Tricksters as well, and that’s why Hella works with him, and his code name is either Woland or Satan.]

Dazai is terrified of what that implies since Chuuya is with Dostoevsky and obviously, Fyodor would use that power against them. Dazai excuses Locke and Dumas saying he will contact them once they have Chuuya back. They leave not before advising Dazai that he may get Chuuya back as his boyfriend if he just tries, exposing Soukoku’s past relationship to Atsushi.

In the meantime Fyodor convinces Chuuya that they are actually dating. Of course, Chuuya being the loyal bastard he is, promises to prove his worth to Fyodor even after he lost his memories.

Dazai has a small breakdown and Atsushi is there to comfort him.

In another flashback we see smol Chuuya alone in the gardens as he help Rando/Rimbaud find Kouyou’s house. Rimbaud worried about the cold leaves Chuuya with his scarf and hat. Chuuya has very confusing emotions about all of this and is approached by Dazai who witnessed the conversation. Dazai explains that Chuuya bottles his emotions and that causes them to be too much and Chuuya to violently blow up hurting people around. In Dazai’s opinion, Chuuya just needs to let himself feel. Together they go back to Kouyou’s house, holding hands, and Rimbaud takes back his scarf after Chuuya thank him, but let’s the kid keep the hat.

In the present, it is quite some time after Chuuya disappeared. Dazai holds a meeting explaining which places is Fyodor most likely to attack using Chuuya. Kouyou is frustrated at the lack of their progress.

Meanwhile, Chuuya after all his training with Corruption is in a visibly bad state but still determined to carry out Fyodor’s orders still believing Fyodor is his partner and that he has friends there – Hella, Behemoth and Koroviev – who like to play poker with him. Of course, he can’t let them down.

Shin Soukoku and Kyouka [who, the author believes, should always work together, have you seen Dead Apple?] are observing one of the targets and lo and behold, Chuuya appears.

They notify Dazai, who immediately sets out with Yosano to their place, and set out to keep Chuuya there until Dazai and Yosano arrive. Chuuya has no trouble fighting the kids, apparently using Dumas’ blood which Fyodor got from the Wolf School, to control Corruption. Fortunately, Dazai arrives and pins him to the ground. In order to get out, Chuuya tricks him into kissing and then stabs him in the arm [aiming for the throat] and gets out.

In the last attempt to stop his escape, Atsushi attacks, slicing through Chuuya’s gravitational bomb and chopping off his arm. Chuuya, hurt and bleeding escapes. Dazai rushes after him and finds him in an abandoned warehouse where Chuuya loses his consciousness.

In another flashback we find out why Dazai ‘broke up’ with Chuuya by making Chuuya hate him and pretending to hate him in return. He tells Odasaku, that Chuuya loses his control when Dazai’s safety is involved and is willing to hurt himself in order to keep Dazai safe. Being the death seeking person Dazai is, he is worried Chuuya will end up hurt because of him and it’s better that they are not together.

In the present, Dazai understands that his ways were wrong and he should have spoken to Chuuya instead of just leaving him. He wishes for another chance but only when Chuuya is back to normal.

Atsushi arrives to see Dazai and Chuuya in the room together, Chuuya sleeping strapped to the bed and Dazai holding his hand. Dazai explains that Chuuya is most likely still brainwashed by Fyodor, even though he nullified The Master and Margarita and because of that they need to keep him from going back to the rat. It’s a hard decision for him, since Chuuya had his choice taken away from him since a very young age – being an experiment subject in a research facility in France and later caught and sold by human traffickers to Japan. He states that for Chuuya going back to the mafia would be the best.

Chuuya was only pretending to be asleep and heard everything but then he ‘wakes up’ officially and falls back into his old bickering with Dazai even though he doesn’t necessary remember him.

While in the ADA, Chuuya is visited by Kouyou and Akutagawa who show deep care for him and Akutagawa actually brings him the hat, Chuuya recognizes from the pictures he saw at Fyodor’s place. Chuuya is confused.

Later that night, Chuuya and Dazai sleep together, Dazai removing his bandages to keep constant contact with Chuuya in order to nullify his powers. Still, Chuuya escapes through the window taking Dazai’s coat and his hat.

We see Dazai open his eyes and call Atsushi telling him that Chuuya escaped as planned and is on route that should make him meet Dumas and Locke ready to give his memories back. Dazai predicts they may need Yosano.

Meanwhile, Fyodor dismisses Bulgakov and his group but tells Hella to stay behind. Hella is the daughter of Locke and has been spying on Fyodor for his dad and because of that, Chuuya was able to get to the agency safely and get his memories back so he can go back to Fyodor in perfect condition. Fyodor kills Hella for her services.