#“bro have no preservation skills”

[mr-nauseam]

I have see many posts were u can tell people forget or ignore that Sejanus was openly s*icidal... I mean I think that explains a lot of why he act in certain way buddies

[raddestrose]

NO WAY

he locks himself in there with a serial killer

you’re gonna get yourself killed someday

[honeyed-disgraceful]

THIS DRAFT FROM LAST YEAR AGED LILE MILK IM 22 AND ALMOST GOT IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH A 38 YEAR OLD LMAO

[renonv]

Spamano Week Day 2 & 3 : Mochis & 2p

Mannnn late yet again BUT ALSO on time 🙏😏

I think both of these concepts are so fun 😭 like the existence of mochis within the universe is crazy but it’s so fucking funny… and oughhh the two pees.. I used to not really care for them BUT I figured them out for myself and now they are a fun thing to rotate in my head nsnddkk

I’ll go more into detail of how I see their 2p versions under the cuttt but WOO I’m on tha rolll

@spamano-week

HI WELCOME TO THE RAMBLINGS OF A CRAZY OLD MAN

Flavio: Literally Flavio to me is what Romano would have been like if he wasn’t fighting the internalized homophobia/ machismo demons 🙏 he’s flamboyant he’s (still) loud, he stands his ground and he is a fucking divaaa. He’s cunning, takes great pride and care and time into his appearance, he expresses his love freely and loudly, and he’s not afraid to pick a fight. He lacks general anxiety and self preservation. He’s also a tad selfish, and just generally two faced. To me, while Romano puts out the harsh exterior, underneath it all he is a vulnerable and sensitive person. Flavio puts on the very approachable exterior, and will be nice, but inside he’s brewing some out of pocket shit. However, he loves and cares deeply and genuinely for a very special few.

If Romano was to meet him, he would call him a slur. But also be jealous of the way Flavio carries himself. If Flavio were to meet Romano, be would make him his next make over project, he is his new gay god mother. Flavio would be jealous of how many people genuinely care about Romano, even if the guy chooses to act like an asshole.

Santiago: He is a quiet and an intimidating guy, not because he’s plotting shit in his head, but because he just does not know how to carry himself around people. While Antonio is an approachable, sociable man who’s always working on putting out positivity and try to do good by everyone because that’s just how he is (and how he copes), Santiago withdraws himself from everyone because 1) Bro genuinely doesn’t get social cues or socialization and 2) thinks of it as better this way for the general public. He’s a little edgy, but in a “scared to hurt others” way rather than “society doesn’t get me” way. Since he yaps significantly less than Antonio, he’s a good listener and is also a bit less dense on certain things. He’s a bit more prone to picking up on the underlying emotions or when people are being sarcastic / say one thing but mean another.

If Santiago and Antonio ever met, it would be… interesting. Santiago would be put off by Antonio’s high energy, but at the same time wish he could express himself as easily as the other, and be as comfortable with physical touch. Antonio would absolutely loose his mind over the gray streak of hair, bro looks very punk rock. He would think of the other as awkward, but also be very impressed at his observational skills.

[blondwhxrewrites]

what about mattheo with a werewolf s/o? Like imagine being like all worked up and horny before a full moon and having angry pre-transformation sex with him

(I’m actually in love with this man)

You tell him your a werewolf, and the first thing he asks is, 'So does that mean we are like considered as mates or some shit?'

By the way he already knew, because my boy is EXTREMELY observant. He just never told you because he wanted you to be ready to tell him. When he figured it out he immediately sat his ass down at the library and read every single book on werewolves he could find.

He's doing everything he can to support you

He isn't at all afraid of you and dude would square up with werewolf you with no hesitation because he has no sense of self preservation

(also I'm adding my own werewolf system because fuck JK Rowling imma do this my own way 😤)

He finds out that werewolves won't hurt the people that they consider 'mates' or a part of their 'pack', and he is taking full advantage of that. 

He sees your werewolf form for the first time and it's literally just a giant wolf and he's standing there like 🧍while you're just wagging your tail all happy because OH MY GOD ITS YOUR MATE 🥰

You have a little spot in the dark forest where you transform and he'll come and visit you.

You bring him the corpses of the animals you hunt and he'll just awkwardly pat your head, and praise your hunting skills

https://pin.it/fEKdLztSL

(this link is an accurate representation of what werewolves look like because ain't no way am I gonna let them be that ugly shit from the prisoner of Azkaban)

You get extremely clingy and possessive the days before a full moon. It's not just towards Mattheo, it's towards your friends too because your senses see them as your 'pack' and you gotta protect them and make sure they are okay

You literally growl at people

Person: GET YOUR FUCKING DOG BITCH

Mattheo: She don't bite

You: *Growls*

Person: YES SHE DO

You also get extremely horny and Mattheo lives for it

You wanna fuck? Mattheo is down and ready to be used 🫡

He is your man slut

You get aggressive during the act and end up biting him on the neck and shoulders and he is wearing those marks proudly. He's strutting around Hogwarts proudly marked as yours 💅

During those days before the full moon, he will be your subby little manwhore

Anything for his princess 🤷

You wanna suck his dick and call him a good boy? He's melting into a puddle of goo. He becomes all blushy and shy because he loves being praised 🤭

Eating your pussy like a man starved.

Please sit on his face and suffocate him (:

You wanna ride him? Bros staring at you in awe while he watches your ass bounce up and down on his cock in reverse cowboy.

My boy is just along for the ride 😁

[bajablasterrr]

More Danny & Jason Being Ghostie Bros. Because I said so

Danny gets sick a lot, like 90% of the time he’s functioning with a cold, or some sort of flu.

Half of it is because he’s got the immune system of a glazed donut after getting fried, dyed, and layed to the side, and the other half is because he’s got like -30000% self preservation skills. 

Jason on the other hand would rather fist-fight the devil than ever get sick even once, and one day he makes one too many jokes about Danny always having a cold

So sick Danny decides it would be a fun idea to fight even more crime just to prove that he’s better than Jason

This results in a lethargic Danny running around Gotham insisting that he’s fine while everyone else is trying to get him back into fucking bed

I imagine it would go something like this

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Danny: *perched atop a building watching Gotham from a distance* I am the protector of this city

Tim: Oh shit, hey buddy, we need you to get down from there please

Damian: *on the phone* Jason, come get your half-corpse boyfriend before he dies again

Jason: first off he’s not my boyfriend, and second he’s fine, you guys got this

Tim: *struggling* Danny no, put the baseball bat down

Danny: *being held down by Tim* I am vengeance

Jason: *sigh* I’ll come get him

[candywife333]

Kidnapped......By Choice

And I am back guys. Sorry for the super long hiatus. Will finish Moo Moo part 2 right after I release this small drabble/one shot hybrid (going to call them DRAB-ONE from now on😆)

pairing: Kidnapper Jungkook x chubby oblivious , super nonchalant Y/N

4th DAY OF CHRISTMAS

(DRAB-ONE)

Trigger: mention of trafficking

As usual, little to no proofreading

Could a girl never get some peace and quiet in this freaking world? I shifted from side to side, attempting to catch sleep but the raucous noise of the dinner party beneath my room prevented me from even drifting off.

As I felt myself slowly succumb into the warm embrace of a peaceful slumber, I heard the sudden thud of my window swing open. BAM! BAM!

WTF?!!! THIS BITCH WAS GOING TO GET IT NOW??!!! WHO THE FUCK WAS OUT TO MAKE ME A SLEEPLESS , STRESS RIDDEN LITTLE TROLL?!!!

That's when I saw him standing against the window, almost a silent specter. Well built thick thighs encased in black leather , check. White ski mask barely showing a peek of pink luscious lips, check. Strong shoulders and arms outlined by a dark leather jacket tapering down to reveal an itty, bitty tiny waist, check.

As I literally gobbled his form up with my eyes, the man sauntered over, as a fluid as a panther towards me. "Hey, hey, dude. Stay right there man. I'm a nervous farter. I wouldn't want to fart on you and make you suffer from inhaling the noxious fumes that come out of my ass".

He quirked one of his eyebrows up seemingly trying to hold laughter in, as he rumbled out in a deep masculine voice that made my panties suspiciously moist, "That is seriously all you have to say to an intruder who has come into your bedroom at night? You are warning him that you might fart? That is your threat"?

I put one hand on my head, growling out in impatience, "Look bro, I wouldn't be warning you if it actually wasn't a weapon of mass destruction. You picked the wrong one tonight. I could ruin your sense of smell so bad that you would think a jar of pickles smell like petunias. Don't test the power of the FLATULENCE. OK"?

I slapped my ass vehemently to prove a point......and also assert dominance. Who the hell did this handsome, drool-worthy dude bro think he was, walking in on me in a ripped stained crop top and sleep shorts that had been swallowed by my ass from behind? I had never been so indecently clothed in the presence of a man. And worst of all, a stranger at that.

However, none of this bravado stopped him in his path as he stood right in front of me. His dark eyes glinted like two twinkling stars in the night sky. "Look little lady, it is better if you cooperate. You are right now being kidnapped, why don't you actually show preservation skills and some healthy dose of fear"?

I snorted, clearly making him surprised as he glared at me in confusion, "There ain't anything small about me man. Everything is large or extra large. Not a small bone in my body since I was 10 years old. Now, why don't you move out of my way before I sit on you and suffocate you with my fat cells and bad odor".

Mirth filtered through his eyes as he seemed to be holding back a laugh. Before I could blink, he restrained my arms behind me. As usual my weak arm strength (can't even do a push up) made me as moldable as jello. He tied my wrists with rope and shoved me onto the bed.

I felt super annoyed. First of all, I wasn't getting sleep. Number two, I wasn't even that pretty enough for him to kidnap and sell into any human trafficking. The trafficker would take one look at me, spit in my chubby face, and shove me back where I came from. That would be the first time, they would want a refund. Well everything has a first I guess.

Before I could sit up on the bed and catch my bearings, he had taken off his mask. My jaw fell open and I swear I started drooling. Jungkook? The hot high school senior that I had been mooning over for close to three years? Why was he trying to kidnap me? Wait......why was I resisting? This was a dream come true.

My mood completely switched as I had a grin on my face, brimming with happiness, "Hey, Jungkook-ssi , why don't you kidnap me a little faster and harder...if you catch my drift"?

He looked bewildered as his piercings shined in the dim light, "You..you aren't scared of what is going on right now"?

I kicked my chubby feet into the air in excitement, cheeks blushing, "I have always wanted to be abducted by you, so I don't mind. So, where are you taking me .....and what depraved activities do you have in mind. Would you mind taking me away for a month, at least till math finals are over"? I winked at him, entreating him to give me an answer.

He stood there, paralyzed in shock as he gritted out, teeth clenched, "This was just supposed to be a prank, your brother dared me to do it for 500 bucks". Tears slipped down my face, lips pouting. "What do you mean Jungkook-ssi? Do you mean that you were never supposed to rail me roughly into oblivion? This was all a set-up"?

Not able to deal with my fake crying, he started trying to reassure me, "No Y/N, it was just a light hearted prank, and I needed the money. Please don't misunderstand, I never meant to harm you. I was just supposed to get you scared enough and have the drone camera outside the window record it".

I peered out the window and saw the drone. My expression fell flat, and I felt glum...disappointed at the outcome. I wanted to be roughly porked like in those dark romance novel books with the mafia leaders who were kidnappers. Well, a girl can have here fantasies I guess, but maybe they were never meant to be.

I sullenly sighed, "Ok then Jungkook-ssi. Now that you got the reaction, why don't you leave? I am tired and sleepy. If you don't do it, it is ok. I will just find someone else to do it".

He seemed relieved, till he heard the last line of what I said. His eyes became frantic, smoldering with anger and lips in a hard straight line as he spit out, "What do you mean someone else"?

I yawned, settling back under the covers, rubbing my eyes, "Are you slow or something Jungkook-ssi. I thought my noncon kidnapping kink would be satisfied today and I could knock it off my checklist. But I guess I just have to find someone to pound me from behind, in a ski mask propped onto a window-sill. It just won't be you. Perhaps....Hoseok-ssi, he did grin my way last week in dance club. Maybe he would be interested".

As my eyes closed slowly, head sinking onto the pillow below I felt a weight dip onto the bed and my wrist pinned onto either side of the bed. I opened my eyes suddenly, to be met with Jungkook's feral grin right above me. I tried batting him away, irritated. What did he want now? His big veiny hands grabbed me by my wrists as his hot breath ghosted my neck. He panted with exertion as he continued in a lethal tone, "I will kill any man who dares touch you. Don't test me sweetheart. I am the only one who gets to have you against a window-sill".

I snorted, amused at his antics. He hadn't looked my way in the past 3 years that I had devotedly followed him around campus. And now suddenly after a stupid bet, he was possessive over me. Nonsense. Balderdash. I turned around on my side, pushing my bed covers higher on my body. This tomfoolery at 12 am was not what I wanted to hear. I drawled out groggily, "Like you would be attracted to my sagging granny panty clad ass. Just go back man. Had enough of lies for today".

Suddenly, I felt cold air abruptly filter onto my pussy and butt. Startled, I looked up to see my damp panties in his vascular hands. Smirking deviously as he rubbed my clit slowly with his calloused finger, spreading the moisture around, making me mewl and clutch at his coat, he whispered against my neck, "What made you think that granny panties would stop me sweetheart"?

[carrotkicks]

Bsd/fnaf au thoughts

Okay, ready? bc imma dump the entire storyline right here right now:

Mori Ougai and Fukuzawa Yukichi are the co-founders of Feddie Faber's Pizzeria (They had some trademark issues to work around), and they were the best of friends and they both wanted to use the power of pizza, robots and capitalism to entertain kids. But Mori had secret, evil ulterior motives, he made a children's pizza place to get close enough to MURDER THEM! That's right, Mori was secretly a child serial killer! why? Bc the souls of dead kids had the ability to extend one's lifespan and bro was really into the prospect of immortality.

Mori's first victim, Yosano Akiko, his friend Fukuzawa's daughter. It was young Yosano's birthday and she was locked out in the rain from her own party, hosted at Feddie Faber's. That's when Mori snekily pulled up to her and MURDERED HER. The security puppet robot at Feddie's tried to save her but ended up malfunctioning in the rain and died beside Yosano. Her soul fused into the security puppet and she was REBORN in to the vengeful Puppet who vowed to give life to any kid murdered by Mori and take him down...

Fast forward to 1983, and Mori's son, 15 year old Dazai Osamu is causing trouble at his younger sibling Yumeno Kyuusaku's birthday party at Feddie's. Dazai has been taunting them and sticking his sobbing sibling's head in the highly volatile springlock Golden Feddie animatronic suit. Sudennly a freak accident occured and the super dangerous springlocks in Feddie's jaw malfunction and they CRUSH Kyuu's frontal lobe. They die. And Dazai is overwhelmed with guilt at being the one to cause their death.

Mori, devastated by his youngest's death vows to never let his kids be killed by animatronics ever again. But he still wants to keep up his child murder hobby. ITS OKAY IF IT ISN'T HIS KIDS. Mori said #notmychildren. Not too long afterwards his youngest child Elise gets scooped by one of his special Child Killer Robots, Circus Bebito (again, trademark conflict), and she eventually possesses that robot. Now the family is left with just Mori and Dazai.

The year is 1985, and Dazai wants to die. He still hangs around his father's pizzeria, and let a few of the regulars get close to him. You could maybe call it friendship.

First, there's Edogawa Ranpo, an older kid that Dazai thought was cool. Ranpo liked detective stories and the gross sugary candy from the prize counter and only played the easy, high ticket yield games in the arcade. Dazai though that was very cool too, especially the detective part. Unfortunately Ranpo's passion for investigation would be his downfall.

Next we have Higuchi, a young kid who found an inordinate amount of joy from the robotic animal performers at Feddie Faber's. Higuchi was a naive kid though, and her trust in the Feddie's character's would be her end....

Izumi Kyouka spent a lot of time playing at Feddie's. She's a pretty shy kid, but cared a lot for her friends in loved ones, a really strong protective streak, one that would get her into danger. Dazai held a lot of fondness for Kyouka, but that couldn't be said for

Her older brother and his no. 1 enemy, Nakahara Chuuya, but looking back on it, Dazai would probably call him his best friend. Chuuya was an employee at Feddie's, and Dazai had some of the most fun in his teenage years harrassing Chuuya's while he tried to serve pizzas in peace. But Chuuya cared too much about his family and seriously lacked self preservation skills, maybe if he kept his head down like a good employee he would have survived.

Finally, there's Akutagawa Ryuunosuke. Dazai never liked Akutagawa, but he did like to bully Akutagawa. Dazai regrets his cruel behavior, the boy didn't deserve what happened to him.

None of the five kids made it out of Feddie's alive. Their disappearances in the summer of '85 was infamously known as the Dissappeared Kids Ordeal (some publication in America got dirst dibs on a catchier name for a similar situation.)

The next person who needed to disappear was their killer, Mori himself. All he needed to do was collect enough samples of the life lengthening soul powers from the child-stuffed animatronics he made and he was set. But, PUPPET YOSANO (yeah she's back) wouldn't allow that, she gifts life to the dead children ghosts and they unionize against Mori. He, in a last ditch effort to hide from the ghosts after him, jumps into his springlock murder suit. The springlock mechanisms fail on him and he gets crushed to death in the suit. The Feddie's day crew eventually find him and, not wanting to alert another major scandal for the company, they seal him inside a back room to rot away forever

Dazai spends the last year of his childhood alone.

He knew his father had something to do with all the death he's experienced throughout his life but he needed the full picture. So Dazai took a *calculated risk* he followed his fathers instruction that he left behind.

> go to the Circus Bebito Party Bunker, finish up the business for me. you will know the truth about what happened to your sister and friends.

Dazai did and he learned about Mori's dark objectives. He discovered his old notes about the kids he killed,

Higuchi was inside the chicken animatronic, she was led away by the killer in a springlock suit

Kyouka ended up inside the bunny. she just wanted to know where her friend and questioned the costumed "employee" who was with him last.

Chuuya was stressed searching for his younger sister, stumbled into the wrong backroom at the wrong time with a conveniently empty fox animatronic at hand. He just wished he didnt trust his boss as much.

Ranpo's attempt at playing detective really didnt end well when he got too close too the truth. Ranpo always liked Feddie more than the other character, but that didnt mean he wanted to get shoved into it.

Akutagawa ended up in the decommissioned Golden Feddie. In a twisted way the two people Dazai hurt the most ended up demonically possessing the same robot.

Dazai heard enough, he was about to leave when. HE DONE GOT SCOOPED. See at his brief tenure working at Circus Bebito's Party Bunker, he got tricket by Fyodor the Circus Ballerina, Nikolai the Circus Feddie, Sigma the Circus Fox and his sister Elise, the Circus Bebito. The Circus robots all fused together to for THE DECAY OF ROBOTS. They trap Dazai in the Scooping Room and Scoop his insides out. And then Dazai got what he wanted and died.

But not really. Dazai was somehow still alive... see, Dazai was injected with the magical dead child soul juice that granted him an extra long life. So his body was dead and hand no internal organs, he was decaying but he somehow survived. Which means that his father did too somehow.

Dazai now has a mission! He wrapped his rotting body in place with bandages, got a security uniform and set to work. He needs to go back to Feddie's and realease the agonized souls of his dead friends, kill the Decay of Robots, and kill Mori. Then he can retire peacufully to the afterlife.

So.. can Dazai survive five nights at Feddie's?

[jellfishjellfish]

Great chapter, branch is moving is up in the world from being the weird kid to the cool kid. I think giving himself a piercing at a play date when the adult supervision turned his back is not going to make him popular with the local kids parents because “dang they can’t have a kid that does that kind of stuff in they’re house under they’re supervision it’s to much of a liability”

Branch is giving the vibes of the kid in the neighborhood that does too much dumb stuff and is such a bad influence on the other kids to be allowed to hang out with the other kids at sleepovers and stuff you gotta watch him like a hawk or else he’ll start giving himself a stick and poke tattoo with a pen and or dye another kids hair at the play date. The other kids probably are going to end up thinking that branch is so cool especially when more bros come to visit and it becomes obvious that branch is related to brozone which is the most famous boyband ever.

Branch and Floyd are grudge and emo respectively where as JD is your classic top 40s pop singer.

Thank you! And you’re so right, Branch is just doing his own thing and the other kids are loving it (and the parents hating it respectfully). And he has very little self preservation skills (especially considering he doesn’t feel pain) so he’s very likely to just do stuff in the moment because it makes sense to him!

He doesn’t even come up with the ideas on his own, but if someone suggests something he thinks is cool he’s just like ‘yeah, okay, I’ll do that!’

Considering he wanted to build a bomb, I’d say the piercing’s quite tame though 😭

And yess on the genres, but I also see JD having a love of country in him (those twangy vocals and melancholy lyrics just hit right)

Thank you for the ask!

[obamousse]

Akaashi's birthday cake

Akashi's birthday was coming up, and Bokuto, Kuroo, and Kenma decided to work on a cake together as Akashi's birthday gift.

Kuroo has exquisite baking skills from baking apple pies for Kenma, which is why he decided to bake a red velvet cake for Akaashi (mind you, he likes red velvet cakes the best).

Kenma buys the ingredients and gifts. Bokuto chooses the gifts, Kuroo chooses the ingredients. Kenma tastes, Kuroo bakes, and Bokuto decorates, which, according to Kuroo, is the most important element since the cake has to be stylized by what Akaashi likes (and Bokuto knows it the most).

The problem: Bokuto forgot his task.

The cake had to be baked around a day before to preserve freshness. Kuroo and Kenma had baked and tasted the cake until it was perfection at the limit god had allowed perfection to be. Kuroo phoned Bokuto 20 times without Bokuto picking up. All is done, except for Bokuto writing "Happy birthday, Akaashi!". Time is ticking, so Kuroo had to take up the task of decorating the cake. He wrote, with the most Bokuto he had ever written with: "Happy birthday, Aghasshee".

"Surprise!"

The cake was finally given to Akaashi now, and Bokuto didn't even show up. Kuroo had to invent a lie about how Bokuto had urgent family things, but he definitely wrote on and decorated the cake. Akaashi knew it was not him - Bokuto may pronounce his name wrong, but he knew how to write it. Though the handwriting imitation was quite impressive.

He appreciated the effort Kuroo and Kenma put in, but couldn't contain his sadness as Bokuto was nowhere to be seen. He could not bring himself to blow the candles - since Bokuto wasn't there to celebrate, and Akaashi knows Bokkun spent a lot of effort into helping Kuroo making the cake. Kuroo and Kenma tried to lighten up the mood by showing him gifts before Bokuto comes up and Akaashi could blow out the candle.

Bokuto comes. In a hurry, breathing heavily.

"Where the hell have you been bro?" - Kuroo inquired, rapid-fire. He was dead-worried, since dragging out the time was hell with every passing second.

"Did he blow the candles?"

"No! He's been waiting for you."

"Thank God. Akaashi, put this on your cake." Bokuto revealed a miniature owl statue that represented Akaashi. "I bought it from the chocolatier down town, gotta board the MRT and walk for a mile to go there. I figure you'd love this on your cake. Happy birthday, Akaashi! Sorry I was late."

Oh. Akaashi breathed a sigh of relief.

Akaashi placed the owl carefully onto his cake. Kuroo shut off the lights, and all four people counted one, two, three-

"Happy Birthday, Akaashi!" - Akaashi blew out the candles, wishing for another year when he's spend his birthday with Kuroo, Bokuto, Kenma, and other people he loves.

Bonus:

Bokuto: And I bought you this giant owl plush too. I figure I gotta get some presents for you since Kenma paid for everything. Kenma: I told you, these presents are from all of us. Kuroo: Did you buy it? Or did you get distracted at the claw-game machine? Bokuto *puts the plush on Akaashi's hands*: with this plush, you're not gonna miss me anymore. Akaashi: I thought you forgot my birthday- Bokuto: How could I forget?

[000marie198]

Done!

Prime Bros being the sillies they are. Enjoy!

Damage Control

-------

Urgent loud shouts mixed in with sounds of growling and struggling can be heard by every flicky and critter having the misfortune of passing by the recently expanded workshop in Green Hill.

"Nine! No!"

"Let me at him! I'll rip his tails out!"

Inside the living room, the source of most of the growling is barely being held back by two others who look like him as he struggles against them to attack the one in front.

"Hey-! Calm down, he was joking!"

"Aye not be joking, brother. Lad sword fights like a limp rope."

"Sails," Tails grunts, both his arms wrapped around their angry, trigger-happy brother, "I swear to Chaos if you don't shut up right now- Woah!"

There's a crash as one very pissed off multi tailed fox manages to push him off and pounces at the pirate, only to hit the coffee table as Sails dodges the attack with an infuriating grin.

"That's some sloppy footwork there."

It has the intended effect of riling the other up even more.

Tails rubs his temples and lets out a sigh of frustration, his namesakes whipping around in agitation. The noises become louder and a startled yelp from Mangey is heard amongst the ruckus. The youngest fox then lets out a growl of his own and pounces at Nine, clinging to his face and trying to pull him back.

The metal tailed fox makes a startled yip, Mangey barks and Sails is unable to stop himself as he snorts and breaks up into amused cackles.

"Beaten by a hug, eh? Never thought I'd see the day."

Tails' ears twitch as they catch the subtle sound of several clicks and low hum, the young aviator instantly recognizing the sound of his brother's namesakes activating.

"Oh no…"

He's running towards the two and grabbing the metal appendages before they could snap towards their laughing idiot of a brother who has zero self preservation skills. Where is Sonic when you need him?

Nine scowls at him, having pried Mangey free from his face and holding the young fox in his arms with far too much gentleness than he'd ever admit.

"Let go, Tails."

"Yeah right. So you two can break more furniture?"

"No," he rolls his eyes, "so I can teach him just how 'awful' I am at combat." He sends the pirate a heated glare.

"Tch," said pirate scoffs from behind Tails. "Very awful, I'd reckon."

"The only combat you are good at is swinging around a large knife."

"And yet, I still managed to defeat you the other day."

"You cheated."

Tails and Mangey share a look, one pair of blue eyes brimming with exasperation and the other with concern.

What do we do? The latter seem to ask.

Tape them to the wall, Tails' mind supplies. He ignores it. He values his stash of mint candies far too much to risk it.

"Pirate." Sails singsongs in response to Nine's earlier statement.

That does it for the other. Their brother places Mangey down and frees his artificial appendages in one smooth movement - Tails being pushed off for the second time in five minutes - before jumping on the pirate without warning, this time succeeding in tackling him as the two start battling like wild cats.

"Oh come on!" The only civilized fox in the room groans, flinching at the sound of something shattering. His frustration is replaced by horror as he realizes what exactly was broken.

"My tablet!" Tails exclaims and glares at the two, throwing every ounce of forgiveness and maturity out the window to pounce on them with a vengeful yell, immediately getting pulled into the ball of wildly intense scuffle.

Mangey watches the escalated fight in bewilderment for a total of two seconds before he jumps into the fray with a battle cry of his own.

Voices and snarls and words mix up into a cacophony of noises until it's impossible to tell the four apart, further crashes sounding out as the ball of fighting fox kits rolls around the place without any regard for the furniture.

Moments later, a distant sonicboom sounds somewhere outside, drowned out by the noise in the living room.

An unnatural gust of wind ruffles the fur of the foxes seconds before the front door slams open and a blue hedgehog merrily trudges in.

"I'm home! You guys won't believe what I…" Sonic trails off as he takes note of the toppled pieces of furniture and sees a fluffy ball of struggling, snarling foxes.

"Woah… What happened in here?"

At the sound of his voice, Mangey lights up with joy and immediately rolls out of the pile to greet his big brother with a grateful hug before sprinting off into a different room, Sonic barely catching sight of the superficial scratches on him. Tails follows the younger's example in extracting himself and leaves the other two vulpines to snap at each other.

"Sonic!" He exclaims, "Thank goodness you're finally here!" He then approaches Sonic and gives his shoulder a sympathetic pat, a relieved grin breaking out on his muzzle that has the hedgehog's brows furrowing in suspicion.

"They're all yours."

"Huh- What?"

Tails doesn't answer and is already running off into his lab with a broken tablet in hand by the time Sonic realizes what he has been left with.

Sonic thanks Chaos that he still knows how to handle stubborn fox kits.

"Alright, you two, break it up," he lightly scolds as he scruffs them both up so they are left limply dangling from his hold.

The simultaneous, ''He started it!'' has him conflicted on sympathizing with tired parents and feeling proudly overjoyed that Nine is finally starting to act his age.

And even knowing Tails and Mangey purposefully left him alone to handle two rough housing foxes and feeling the briefest twinge of exasperation, Sonic cannot help but let out a fond smile.

~

[devilboydogman]

Reigen Arataka Headcanon Time Baby: EDITED

He/him trans guy! Has been on T since age 18 and got top surgery at age 23.

Asexual! And homoromantic! But also demiromantic, probably. Very much sex repulsed, but cuddling is Excellent once he’s reached a certain level of trust!

He has ADHD, autism, depression, RSD, NPD, and dyscalculia!

He is Not White, or even half white. He bleaches his hair, babes. Bro is 100% Japanese

Yes I am a guy who is 100% on board with the residual katana scar headcanon! Love that!!

His lungs ain’t in great shape, y’all. I headcanon he started smoking at the ripe old age of 15 and didn’t slow down until Mob showed up and he was like Ah, I have to set a Good Example. I cannot let this child suffer from secondhand smoke. (He still occasionally allows himself One cigarette.) He’s also hypermobile, but this doesn’t start really disabling him until post-canon.

I know he has a canon height of around 5’10” but when I write and draw him he is 5’7”. I do not take constructive criticism on this. (Mob is taller than me for fucks sake, let me take Reigen down a notch at LEAST, PLEASE GOD)

He has a vast array of knowledge and skill in cooking, but rarely has the time or motivation to actually cook for himself. He usually only cooks properly when other people are around (rare)

In general, his actions are very much driven by either impulse or dire need. I mean come on. Have you seen this guy’s decision-making? That man has so much ADHD executive dysfunction in him. And also a general over-self preservation/ self destruction cycle that complicates things.

His lack of offering personal info on his life and feelings are a result of fear of rejection and a need to project the desired self, as is expected with RSD and NPD. The self aggrandizing is a necessity for his mental well-being.

His hyperactivity and lack of volume control are at times unavoidable, so he often ends up playing it into whatever he’s trying to do.

Like many neurodivergent people, his social skills were rigorously honed into a very convincing mask. He had to STUDY how to read people, y’all. It became a hyperfixation. Mobgle searches on body language and psychology, observation, PRACTICE IN THE MIRROR. All of it.

So yeah, love that guy. Comment with your own or if you like any of these!!

[praecurokat]

some moments that amused me/thoughts from the recent episode:

-river’s sassy “did we need that?” about being hit in the head ☠️

-david’s dementia and standish redirecting him was so sad😭

-the entirety of the scene where lamb was being arrested by emma 😂

-Roddy having a workout machine in his office (ofc) and proceeding to flirt with emma😭😭 bro has 0 self preservation skills

-Giti appearance yasss 🎉 and Molly appearance!!

-victor and bertrand’s mom randomly enjoying charcuterie and wine while talking to river bc france ig 🇫🇷 🥖 ✨

-river having an epic slay parkour moment then immediately falling through a roof and stealing a guy’s bike

-everyone trying to melee fight that french guy and then lamb sensibly taking him out with a taxi 😂

[lullabyalikpoptarot]

Ateez Dynamics (Yeosang's Perspective)

Okay, now time to step into Ateez' dynamics again and look into what Yeosang thinks of the members and their dynamics.

Hongjoong (The Loner/5 of Pentacles) Well, this is interesting, what is this!? Someone feels left out here, abandoned, isolated, desolated and alone. He may help him out when he is feeling alone, because the two people in the card are catching my eye. Maybe he understands his need for alone time. He may feel like he lacks support or doesn't get much there, but Hongjoong seems to be of help to him. This was weird, went somewhere I didn't expect.

Seonghwa (The Patient/2 of Pentacles) It seems he sees him as a calm and patient person. The calm of the storm I got. He sees him as someone who can balance many things and prioritize many things. He has good multi-tasking skills. He has an ability to adapt to different situations. It seems they have a good balance. A kind of playful approach to their dynamic. It seems like they are both busy and like doing multiple things. He may like that he is able to stay stable through difficult periods. He may like to have that trait. There is something about him being able to juggle things. He can juggle the ebbs and flows in life. Wow, that took me a minute to get this out of the energy, another non chatty one here. I mean, wth, he is a Gemini right, ain't they chatty? lol

Yunho (The Worrier/10 of Pentacles) This makes no sense to me? Who is the worrier here, I can't see this being Yunho, or does Yunho worry about him? Okay, there is someone who is abundant and has a lot, someone pretty successful, but they focus on what they don't have or worried they will lose it all, this could be how he feels about Yunho. Why do these energies not want to talk today? Because I am confused. He may see Yunho as having high expectations and being too attached to results, or wanting things to line up perfectly. I don't know, this surprises me. Yunho did not give me that vibe, but hey, don't know these people. I guess maybe he worries about losing what he has at times. I am surprised by what I am getting here.

San (The Summoner/King of Cups) Well, seeing the KOC's makes sense, since San is a Cancer. He sees him as caring, compassion and a deep soul. He adores him and thinks he is a sweet dude. He seems to offer him a lot of loving advice and advice of support. He may help him ask for things that he wants or helps push him to get what he wants. Or maybe he helps him see the power he holds. Dude seems like he may have some confidence issues here. He may go to him for emotional support.

Mingi (The Contortionist/8 of Swords) This is kind of giving me he bends to his will and doesn't freely express himself to him, or afraid to be himself around him. He may make him feel insecure, and this may be without Mingi even realizing it. Maybe Mingi exudes confidence that he doesn't and that makes him feel small. Bro, this energy is very confusing and hard to decipher. Honestly, him being a Gemini, this makes sense now. Geminis can be all over the place mentally. It is like Mingi has this sense of flexibility he doesn't have or this confidence. I just want to say this is all in his head. I don't think Mingi is doing anything but being his self.

Wooyoung (The Persistent/4 of Pentacles) He feels he holds strong to his beliefs and ideals, umm can be stingy, I heard. Can keep to himself, protective of what he values. I am seeing him be a bit closed off. He preserves and conserves a lot. It seems he is focused on what he is doing to worry about others. He is someone with lots of self-control and can be stubborn at times. They seem pretty closed off from one another and may not help each other out much.

Jongho (The Past/3 of Swords) Well, someone was hurt from the past, maybe some hurtful words said. Someone may have felt shame and vulnerability, as there is a naked person in the oracle card, so it gives me someone being exposed or vulnerable. But who is it? Yeosang? There is a child in the card, and it is giving me childhood wounds being brought up. It is like something about this dynamic triggers a childhood wound, omg, like what is this!? It is like he has to face things from the past, not sure what Jongho has to do with that, his energy makes no sense, so I am done.

Not sure how great this was, but always post whatever I get, this was messy and confusing af, what is up with these readings today!? These weren't as fun, because they confused the heck out me. But here it is.

[bee-arts]

I can stop thinking about the na bros. They're literal icons.

And let me tell you. Those assholes snowboard. And they're fuckin' good at it.

They go on brotherly bonding snowboarding trips twice a year and spend a week smoking weed and doing stunts no one should do.

They're immortal, they have no self-preservation skills.

Once or twice they ventured away from the slope and got very very lost. Canada had to use his snow sense (like a spidey sense but make is Canadian) to navigate back to civilization.

Don't lie to me, if you were immortal, wouldn't you do this kind of dumbass shit with your best friend?

[somewhere-over-the-rynbow]

Thoughts while listening to Death Shroud:

SPOILERS AHEAD. Obviously.

• nicknicknicknicknicknick

• Ellie where are you getting coffee

• what do you put in your coffee???

• “There aren’t many spare parts for you Nick” why can’t you use gen 2 synth parts?

• Goodneighbor? THIS EARLY? MY BITCH IS BACK?!

• HANCOCK HANCOCK HAN- Hancock? HANCOCK!?

• THEY HIT THE FUCKING PENTAGON THIRD RAIL

• HANCOCK!!!!!

• wait why would Nick order a drink

• KENT KENT KENT KENT KENT KENT KENT-

• KENT NO-

• omg canon Nora real???

• Nick stop encouraging Hancock’s chem use

• how the hell are they gonna get Hancock into Diamond City

• cram! It’s meat… mostly!

• DID THEY KILL ELLIE

• thank GOD ellie is safe

• “drab upstairs apartment” lmao they said your interior decorating skills suck nick

• Nick “The Dick” Valentine

• Okay WHO is charlie????

• damn what did the Minutemen do to y’all

• Nick 4 Mayor

• who even is the mayor of Diamond City now

• John “Hold Me Back Nicky!” Valentine Hancock

• that was supposed to say Hancock, but Valentine was accidentally typed and that’s funnier.

• 3/4 families are missing their daily intake of processed powder cheddar? Believable.

• ayo time skip?

• lmao Seth Patrick Day

• OMG REMINISCING ABOUT THE PREWAR GOD I LOVE THIS OLD MAN SO MUCH

• D I M A ! ?

• omg Nick and Nora are besties <3

• OMG ALL THE COMPANIONS HANG OUT!?

• Hancock you’re already back <3

• oh Moe,,,, never stop lying babe

• his source is “i made it the fuck up”

• The Mechanist is back????? Hello???

• salty bitch. can you leave Sole and Co alone like goddamn

• Is the Mechanist a Synth now?

• THE CHILDREN OF ATOM?????

• wait no

• NO

• YOU CANT DO AN AD NOW WHAT

• WHAT ABOUT PIPER??? CAIT???

• I don’t care who Nick Valentine sends, I am NOT eating sugar bombs

• did they fucking nuke Piper

• THEY FUCKING NUKED THEM!?

• NORA!!!!!

• omg Shaun :)

• omg Nick :(

• omg Danse???? Why are you here what

• hdjdjdjd say hi to your big brother Nick, Danse

• “don’t touch me” lmao

• oh FUCK MACCREADY

• oh no. strong left. that’s… so sad…

• Protective mom Nora!

• NORA AND HANCOCK NORA AND HANCOCK

• I love them all so much oh my god

• this is a fucked up family reunion

• ugh FUCK maxson all my homies hate maxson

• “An old flame” “Seriously? I wanna see how that works” Hancock is asking what we’re all thinking

• bro can Nora have anything

• I can not believe that Hancock and Danse are friends now lol

• lmao don’t rob the vault tec rep

• wait. why didn’t Nora invite him to Sanctuary :(

• HIS NAME IS MACK!?

• god I love you so much Mack

• omg this trio can NOT be good lol (Nora, Hancock, Danse)

• Nora how the fuck is Hancock lifting Danse

• “Danse, scan the building, use infrared vision to pick up vitals” “I don’t have infrared vision” “Really? So much for human 2.0” he’s such a smart ass I love him

• FEV conjoined twins???? Omg that’s so fucking cool

• Hancock, stealing is bad

• Hancock, Florida is bad

• lmao Danse is bitter about Nora taking Nick instead of him haha

• Oh shit they got Lorenzo’s crown? Nora you can’t leave this shit laying around girl

• OMG PSYKERS

• Nora really. You freed Lorenzo??? You dummy

• okay so Hancock and Danse aren’t really friends now lol, they just kinda tolerate each other. Real.

• “No, are you nuts? He’s armored, dual wielding, and you’re wearing a 16th century nightgown!” “You unpatriotic son of a-” “Hush, damn it!” these three are so important to me

• UNITY???? UNITY!? no way they’re doing a Master plot right?

• so is this the same mechanist as in the automatron DLC?

• damn these 3 are agile

• omg not Hancock’s coat!!!!

• oh fuck the silver shroud and mechanist fused

• can we please discuss how fucking disgusting yum yum deviled eggs sound. How the fuck were they preserving eggs. Why would you make prepackaged deviled eggs??? I always thought that was such a weird pick for a food lol

• YO WHY ARE WE AT SANCTUARY

• uh oh. UH OH.

• WHERE IS SHAUN.

• can y’all let Nora have ONE THING god DAMN

• OH THANK GOD CODSWORTH

• I cant believe they canoned Nora and Danse being together,,,, damn

• omg Hancock please don’t traumatize Shaun

• Hancock do NOT give Shaun alcohol oh my god

• THEY KILLED MAMA MURPHY :(

• can they stop killing my favorite old people

• omg I forgot about you Nick lol

• hey Charlie? What the fuck

• DONT FUCKING HUMAN NICK-

• do NOT kill Mack PLEASE

• KELLOGG!???? WHY ARE YOU HERE

• bro can Nora have ANYTHING damn-

• can’t have shit in the commonwealth fr

• AMARI WHAT THE FUCK

• OMG KELLOGG NICK THING IS TIED UP!?

• Mack you are fucking useless (I still love you though)

• why are we talking about puppies what

• oh my god :(

• OH FUCK A BOMB?

• Nick… you fucking plug yourself into computers???? hacker supreme

• omg he’s so robot

• omg Mack you are so papaw

• it’s cre-shendo not cre-sendo

• Nick you are NOT captain america omg

• shit I guess he is captain America

• poor papaw has had such a day let him go home Nick

• “I’m not asking!” DAMN nick

• WHAT. HOW DID HE CALL A CAB.

• HOW DOES HE HAVE A PHONE???? WHAT JUST HAPPENED???? WHAT

• this is so funny what the fuck is happening

• WHY IS EVERYONE ACTING LIKE THIS IS NORMAL WHAT

• YOU CANT CUT TO A VIM AD NOW HUH

• ok it is kinda funny to imagine a salesman in power armor lol

• Huh. Cannibals will eat ghouls. Interesting.

• learn to drive? How? What driving schools are there???

• okay the idea of a cab driver in the commonwealth is so funny. But how the fuck did Jefferson come into existence-

• NICK CAN WALK UNDERWATER????

• WHAT. IS NICK A TIME LORD!?

• WHAT IS HAPPENING. WHAT. NICK. NICK WHAT IS HAPPENING. WHAT ARE YOU DOING.

• WAIT IS 47 THE UNDERWATER VAULT!?

• Mack is so real lol

• HIS NAME IS DAVID DWECKER!? I THOUGHT IT WAS MACK

• omg David my beloved peepaw

• 747683 is not 5 digits Nick

• Champion of Justice???? What?

• WHY WOULD THE CODE BE SHROUD?????

• maybe I’m missing something?????? It is 6 am lol

• I’m sorry, did Nick magic a fucking vault into existence

• CRYOPOD!!!!!! TWO YEARS AGO???? WHAT.

• time to wake up bitch

• NICK STOP MAGICING

• … what? THE SILVER SHROUD!?

• WHAT IS HAPPENING

• but… the shroud… isn’t real… did Nick just create the fucking Silver Shroud?

• it should be 2289, not 2287

• “Same words Hancock uttered after smoking a tire that one time…” huh???? Nick and Hancock hang out lol

• EMOJI???? HOW DO THEY KNOW WHAT EMOJI’S ARE!????

• I’m sorry, I can’t get over Nick Valentine accidentally bringing fucking Batman into existence simply for the drama of it all

• Poor David lol

• How The fuck is Nick gonna explain all this to Nora, Danse, and Hancock

• HOW DOES THE SHROUD KNOW JEFFERSON????

• oh. Ok. That makes sense.

• this is like the world’s strangest fanfiction

• NICK. STOP DOING MAGIC. OH MY GOD.

• WHY ARE NORA AND DANSE HERE. WHO IS DEAD. WHAT.

• WHERE IS HANCOCK!?

• WHY IS THE SHROUD CASUALLY A PART OF THEIR GROUP NOW

• MACCREADY IS DEAD!? WHY IS HE HERE. WHERE DID HE COME FROM.

• Okay, I’m starting to think that Nick managed to get high off Jet or smth

• who is the duke????

• “sociopath science daddy in slacks” What the hell maccready

• “just one more job” thanks. Gonna go sob now

• omg fancy lad snack cakes my beloved

• omg Hancock is in his Robin era

• wow. Just remembered Kent is dead. Devastating

• pay your employees Shroud.

• An old lady, the Silver Shroud, and Hancock get into a cab…

• why is no one questioning this cab

• honestly though. I understand why Hancock isn’t. He probably just thinks he’s hallucinating lol.

• “Fish Lips Malone!” what. is happening. I’m as confused as Hancock is…

• “activate passive aggressive restraint!” What is that????

• Hancock why do you know every criminal.

• “yes indeed my flesh peeling friend!”

• “man I have never seen anyone who needs to be laid more than you do” “finally someone else says it” oh my GOD I love Hancock so much (and Jefferson. Man, do I love Jefferson.)

• “omg Hancock we’ve been waiting for you! Oh… and the shroud’s here, too…” just like me fr

• Is the Silver Shroud an incel…

• THEY MEDUSA’D MAGNOLIA!?

• lmao everyone else hates Johnny Guitar?

• KELLOGG GET THE FUCK OUT.

• Hancock you are REMARKABLY casual about the dead man in your booth

• The Silver Shroud is a short king lol

• why is Kellogg the only one who thinks the shroud being here is weird

• Nora is an “uppity broad” lol

• why are y’all dissing Hancock, leave my man alone-

• Just gotta say… it’s a great day to be a Hancock stan

• THE DUKE IS THE MECHANIST!?

• what. A literal rat faced man? Why does he have 3 arms?

• Hm. They still do beehive hair, huh? I’m kinda impressed

• what do you mean they turned Louie into a mole rat using the creation engine

• “stay low to the ground, my crusty companion!”

• THEY TURNED THE SILVER SHROUD’S GUN INTO A DOG????

• THEY TURNED HANCOCK INTO A STATUE NO-

• how could they do this to me.

• the Silver Shroud can say fuck. Nice

• omg wait

• Hancock is… Hancock’s… he’s…

• he’s stoned

• ba-dum-tsh

• Travis, please don’t sexually harass all of Diamond City

• I’m more than half way through this and I genuinely have no clue what’s going on lol

• omg they legit are using the creation engine huh

• HANCOCK???? YOURE BACK??? WHY DID YOU DRINK GASOLINE!???

• I wanna have tea with god…

• Dr… Satan?

• HAROLD!? WHY ARE YOU HERE????

• Nora 🤝 Harold

never getting to rest

• I think it’s very funny that Hancock is just… back.

• damn they all got stoned

• and the stone is gone again

• what even is the point of the stone lol

• THE MYSTERIOUS STRANGER!?

• OH MY GOD

• OH MY GOD

• OH MY GOD

• THEY KILLED THE MYSTERIOUS STRANGER!?

• who is… showing up…

• WHO IS OBEDIAH BLACKHALL

• Damn. Bye bye Obediah.

• I genuinely can’t remember what started this lmao

• Oh fuck, Kellogg is back…

• omg they broke the scarab!!!

• what do you mean by too many voices

• too many characters??????? WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT

• WHY IS IT JUST NICK AND THE SHROUD VS REALITY

• they are SO remarkably calm

• “see if you can… blind him with some… bullets to the face” yeah that should do it Nick

• “my speed should give me the upper hand” your what Nick

• WHY IS NICK SUPER FAST WHAT

• … they’re summoning bitches now? A Grognak bitch? WHY ARE YOU HERE?

• wait. Nora is the one magicing?

• oh wait. You mean that Nora was the silver shroud for a while. Right? What is happening.

• The Silver Shroud is really good at sticking to his bit lol

• OMG NORA BECAME THE SILVER SHROUD AND CHANGED REALITY?????

• Silver Shroud speed runs an existential crisis

• uh oh

• uh oh

• uh oh

• reality is literally crumbling

• SHEOGORATH!?

• oh fuck Bethesda is crumbling

• GLADOS!?

• THE JOKER!!!!!???

• CLAPTRAP!!!!!!!????

• Poor Nick…

• can you guys stop having relationship issues when I’m on the phone with my dentist

• SNIPER?????

• GLADOS is hitting on Nick Valentine. Yeah. Okay.

• “Thank you, intelligent sociopathic blender!”

• at no point could I have predicted this.

• they gave Nick a portal gun.

• he is opening a portal on the moon.

• they are essentially creating a black hole.

• How The FUCK is Nick supposed to mentally handle all of this

• GLADOS didn’t even get to say goodbye :/

• omg they’re in the creation engine

• OH MY GOD THEY ARE IN TODD HOWARD’S BRAIN????

• Jesus Christ, poor fucking Nick

• Hey, you. You’re finally awake.

• what do you mean it was all a dream

• how did Nick fall asleep

• is everyone alive??????

• wow. Huh. What.