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#“PLEASE I JUST WANNA SEE MY WIFE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE”
backinmyphase · 20 hours
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Not my honeymoon
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Synopsis: A household of an arranged marriage with Gojo Satoru wasn't easy. And as the pressure from the higher ups was becoming more and more there was something to discuss. Your honeymoon.
Or: Satoru Gojo doesn't even know how attached he will grow to his wife yet.
Pairing: Gojo x reader, 3000 words
Not really satisfied with this but I hope you enjoy!
Series Masterlist!
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"Are you okay, Gojo?"
No, he was definitely not. He wasn't since all of this started. Since he was destined to marry you. But now as he looked at you it was a different kind of not okay.
What did he do???
You looked sad, no, devastated. Ever since you two ate breakfast together every morning, he thought you would look more relaxed. Maybe even comfortable.
But you seemed to put up a barrier everytime he asked something. And then there was the name.
You still called him Gojo. Even though you were now named the same.
You so carefully kept your distance and you had this sad look in your eyes.
He was worried.
"Yeah, of course." he returned to eating his breakfast. After a bit of silence he opened his mouth again and was surprised he could speak.
"Are you? You look tense."
Your body tensed up again as you looked at him and he wanted to punch himself. He made you uncomfortable, didn't he?
"I am, no worries." you didn't raise your head.
Where did his confidence go? His charisma? His social skills?
Something about his wife made all these so important and natural things dissappear.
The silence spoke loud and the sounds of the eating didn't cover enough of it.
This silence wasn't unusual. In fact it was almost always there when you ate breakfast together. So all the time you saw each other.
And no, he didn't like it. For some reason, on which Satoru couldn't put his finger on, he desperately wanted to know you. He wanted to make peace with you, maybe even be friends with you.
But you seemed so untouchable, he couldn't describe it.
"Well…" Satoru cringed at the sound of his voice. "I have to go to work now."
He stood up and made his way to the door where he made himself ready. "See you later. Have a nice da-"
"Wait, Gojo." Your voice sounded so hesitant, it scared him. "Can we talk later?"
As he looked at you, his whole mind went blank. He felt like he was gonna die. Why did you look at him like that? What did you wanna talk about? Why not now?
"Sure, I can try to come home earlier." He tried to keep his voice steady, but his whole strongest being was shaking in fear.
"Great." you nodded with a neutral look that did NOT scream 'Great'. "Then have a good day at work."
"Thank you, you have a nice day too."
He was going to die, wasn't he?
~
"You look like a corpse." Suguru was always soo considerate.
Satoru sighed as he sat down next to his friend. "Just give me the missions."
His best friend raised an eyebrow. "You know, you should attend the meetings for a change. I'm not always gonna be able to get your missions for you."
"Yeah, you are right Suguru, what would I ever do without you? You are such a good friend." Satoru yawned as he waved his hand.
"Would you please be so kind and enlighten me where I have to be today?"
"I'm going to overlook that sarcasm for today." Suguru handed him a piece of paper. "Here's the list for today."
As Satoru looked at the very long list in horror, Suguru spoke again. "But for real, you look terrible. I thought things were going fine in your marriage?"
"Of course they want me working overtime today." Satoru groaned. "I swear one day I will make all of the higher ups-"
"Satoru, what's wrong?"
He stopped in his rant and sighed. "She wants to talk."
Suguru raised his eyebrow again. "And that's bad, why exactly?"
"Because she always looks like I killed her pet or something like that!" Satoru whined and looked at his paper.
"She doesn't like me."
Suguru shrugged with his shoulders. "I mean, you still didn't apologize."
As Satoru didn't say anything, Suguru continued. "And you also don't really talk to her. How can you expect her to like you yet?"
"Yeah, yeah, you're right." Satoru whispered. Holding his list up, he begged Suguru. "Can you take some of my missions? Please?"
Shacking his head, suguru laughed. "That one time was an exception, I had to work three days in a row for that Satoru. I'm sorry but I have lots of missions too. It's the season."
Satoru just nodded. He had seen this coming.
30 missions in only 12 hours?
It would be a challenge. And it would cause him a little trouble.
But would he give up?
He smiled to himself.
~
You didn't have any time anymore.
The letters of your mother became overbearing, asking where you and Gojo will go for your honeymoon. Asking, that you have surely talked with him about it?
No, you didn't. In fact you were too nervous to even look at him.
You were relieved that he didn't seem to despise you, since he and you ate together now. But he also didn't talk to you and that made you question yourself.
Did he even want to talk?
You needed more time. So much more time. How could they all expect, that you could just sleep with him?
No that just was absurd.
"Mrs. Gojo? How are you feeling today?"
Hina really liked you over the time. Her smile somehow made all of this a bit lighter.
How could you survive a week without her? Just with your husband and the pressure to do something?
"Alright. How are you feeling?" you smiled back, trying to hide your nervousness.
"Perfect, like always." She answered right away, bowing a bit. "Would you like a snack?"
You chuckled a bit. "I can get myself a snack, Hina, you really don't have to."
She shook her head. "Nonsense, it is my job to make you food." She smiled at you knowingly. "And I also get paid for it."
You laughed a bit. "Well, I think my husband will keep paying you even when you make me a snack less."
"If you think so Mrs. Gojo." she made a little curtsy and laughed as she went into the kitchen.
You smiled to yourself as you looked after her. You would miss her on your honeymoon.
Oh god the honeymoon…
~
"Could you please just die?!" Gojo was annoyed as fuck as the curse before him just kept sneaking into barriers and hiding from him.
Normally he wouldn't be this mad.
But he had to be home in time today. And as the curse escaped a crazy laugh at him his anger only rose.
His finger twitched. He wanted to just open his domain and make puddle of this pathetic being. But there were still people near and it would be a bit overkill.
So he had to work with red and blue.
And he had to be fast.
"Gojo Satoruuuhuuuuuu." the distorted voice of the curse spoke underneath him. So smugly, that Satoru felt like laughing.
"Found you."
Hollow purple.
As the cursed energy of the curse slowly disappeared Satoru looked at his list. Still 4 curses in 4 locations. And only 30 minutes till 9 pm.
He had to be faster. Before you would think he didn't care.
If there was just one more stupid barrier, he swore he would-
Goddammit.
~
It was almost 8:51 as you thought you should just eat and go to sleep.
Maybe you would find the courage to talk to him tomorrow too and everything would be fine.
Maybe.
"Should we serve dinner, Mrs. Gojo?" Hina looked at you and waited patiently for your answer.
And as you looked at her something in you switched.
"Wait. My husband isn't home yet, we will wait for him."
Hina chuckled and nodded. She smiled knowingly as she went into the kitchen.
You looked at the clock. 8:56 pm.
You sighed as you sat there. Playing with your glass, you wondered.
Would Gojo even want a honeymoon?
If he didn't, that would be a problem. The higher ups were persistent of you two going somewhere in japan to have 'enough time'.
Your glass seemed to shake, nerarly breaking.
What would you do? What would you tell them? What, what, what-
Forcefully the door opened and Gojo stood there.
A Gojo stained with blood, his blindfold pulled down, looking at you with big eyes.
"What did you want to talk-"
"Why are you bloody-"
You talked at the same time, looking confused at each other. You waited for an answer, as he looked at you confused.
"What do you mean, bloody?" he looked down. Then his eyes widened and he chuckled. "Oh, you don't have to worry, it's not mine."
What did he mean 'don't worry'? He looked like he was out of a horror movie!
Perplexed you looked at him. "Is this all from the curses-?"
"Anyway you wanted to talk?" only now he closed the door behind him.
You blinked at him. Two times. Three times. Then you looked down. "Yeah. But if you are to tired, we can also talk tomorrow -" or the day after, or the day after that day, or…
"I'm not too tired, don't worry." He looked behind you at the empty table. "Did you already eat?"
Just as you wanted to answer, Hina stepped in and took the opportunity to speak. "Mrs. Gojo, now that Mr. Gojo is here, should we serve the food?"
You looked at her and just nodded.
"Well, then." Gojo clapped one time. "We can talk as we eat, right? Then let's sit down."
He took your chair and you wanted to ask what he wanted to do, as he pulled it and offered you the seat. You just sat down and muttered a small thanks.
He smiled, he smiled?, and went to his seat on the opposite side of the table looking at you full of expectation.
Your mind was blank. All the words you so carefully constructed to sentences were all gone. The only thing in your head was the question:
What if Gojo didn't want a honeymoon?
"You waited for me to eat?"
You looked up to Gojo and he smiled at you again. Since when was he so talkative??
"Yeah, I did."
Your voice was much more quiet as you wanted. But he didn't seem to mind as he looked at you with that sparkle in his eyes.
Or maybe his eyes always looked like that.
"Thank you. But you don't have to do that. Most of the time I work much too long for you to stay up and not eat."
"Well, maybe we could still eat dinner together sometimes."
Your mouth spoke without your permission and his widening smile made your head dizzy.
"Your food. We hope you enjoy your meal." Hina placed dinner onto the table bowed a bit and then went into the kitchen as fast as she could.
"Soooooo." Gojo looked down at his food. "What did you wanna talk about?"
"Well…" you stopped, weighing your options of what you could say. Oh, just say it. "I wanted to discuss your honeymoon."
As you looked up you saw two big blue eyes blinking at you. "Our honeymoon? Ohhhhhhhhhhhh"
His shoulders visibly starting to relax as he sighed of relief. A smile forming on his lips again. "Whew, I thought I did something wrong. You had me scared, you know."
"I had you scared?" you looked at him in disbelief. "You came in like a madman covered in blood!"
"Oh, trust me." Gojo leaned back. "That's not nearly as terrifying as my wife, when she is angry at me. She can get really mad, you know?"
You couldn't hide the disbelief in your face and just shook your head. But slowly a smile was forming on your lips. "You're stupid."
Satoru chuckled again and took a bite of the food. Then he looked at you again. "Yeah, yeah. But back to the topic."
Leaning a bit forward, he raised an eyebrow. "Where do you want to go for our honeymoon?"
His voice sounded so casually you felt dumb. "Oh, I don't know. I wanted to ask you."
He tilted his head. "Do you even want to have a honeymoon?"
"What-" panic flooded you as you thought about the higher ups. "Of course!"
"If you say so." he didn't seem convinced but nodded. "But there has to be a place you always wanted to go."
You shook your head. "No, not really. You can decide."
His eyes narrowed as he leaned forward. "Is there no country you ever wanted to go to?"
"No!" you spoke so fast, you couldn't stop yourself from your panic taking over. "I mean- I would like to be in Japan."
He kept silent as he inspected you. And then he sighed. "I have nothing against it, if that's what you want. But you seem so on edge."
You looked down. "Sorry. This…" your throat tightens but you manage to say the words in your mind. "It's just very important."
He blinked at you again and then smiled so softly, you didn't know Satoru could even look at you like that. "It's okay, but if you are too focused on making it perfect, it sabotages itself, doesn't it?"
You couldn't bear his words. The voice of your mother played so loudly in your right ear.
Be a good wife. Be a good wife. Be a good wife be a good wife beagoodwife-
"Would you like to go to a quiet place?" Satoru chuckled to himself. "I wouldn't say no to it."
He looked so sincere. Never before had he talked to you like that. Of course you did have some small talk about his day and what you read the last day, but he seemed so relaxed and like himself right now.
Was this the charismatic Gojo Satoru so many people told you about?
"I would like that." you whispered.
"Hina?" His gaze focused on the girl who quickly emerged from the kitchen. "You and your grandma lived in Shirahama, didn't you?"
She nodded quickly and smiled. "Yes, it's nice there. A bit of the ocean to see and plenty of nature."
She looked at you expectantly. "It's really relaxing, Mrs. Gojo."
Somehow, her shy look made you smile too. "Well, we'll have to go and see it then."
Hina smiled at you with sparkling eyes and bowed a bit again. "You won't regret it!"
"Definitely not!" Satoru laughed a bit. "Then that's settled."
"What-" he looked at his food and continued eating without a care in the world. How could he just carelessly think that that was it?
"But we still have to discuss everything with the higher-ups!"
The atmosphere became much colder along with his gaze. He had stopped eating and his gaze pierced you.
His figure suddenly sitting up straight, his arms to the side, he raised his head.
"Why should I discuss our honeymoon with them?"
The words were caught up in your throat.
You looked down at your food and tried to justify your silence by eating.
"Did you just want to talk to me because of them?" his voice was so much colder than it had been seconds before.
You frantically swallowed your food. "No, I… It wasn't that, really!"
The lies were hard to get off your lips. But he couldn't know about the meetings, no, he simply couldn't!
He was silent. His gaze was lowered and you could no longer see his beautiful blue eyes.
"I wanted to… Get to know you better. We hardly know each other." You pointed to the food table.
"I think it's good that we're eating together now, but that hardly adds anything. I just wanted… For us to have more time together."
When he still didn't say anything, you lowered your head too. "It's just… I thought we still had to organize everything with them? Because of your work and clan duties?"
Gojo chuckled and you heard him looking up. "As if they could fight back. We can just leave."
His voice halled through the room. "And we will tomorrow."
"What?" Shocked, you looked at him. "You can't be serious, can you?"
A huge grin was forming on his face. "You still have to learn how serious I can be. We're leaving tomorrow."
He pulled out his cell phone and typed something. "One of my clan employees will arrange our trip."
"Gojo, we can't just leave!"
"Why not?" he looked deep into your eyes. "Why can't we just say 'fuck them'?"
You shook your head. "Maybe you could, Gojo, but not me! I would disgrace my clan!"
Gojo stood up abruptly. "This is our honeymoon! Your honeymoon! What they think doesn't matter! You're my wife now, those bastards have to respect you! Understand that!"
"It's not that simple." You could only whisper.
He shook his head. "Nevertheless let's go tomorrow. I'll write a letter to your mother and explain that I just took you with me."
He approached your seat. "You wouldn't be to blame."
As if she would think it wasn't your fault. They'd all curse you because then they wouldn't know where you two even were.
But wasn't that what you wanted?
"I'm going to sleep." Determined, you headed for your room. You needed to clear your thoughts.
"We can talk about it again in the morning. And maybe go straight away." He followed you to your door.
"There would be consequences." Something in your voice trembled. "Just running off like that."
And as you stood there, your door to your room already in your hand, he stepped right behind you. His body closer than ever.
Shouldn't Infinity be pushing you back? Why could you feel his warmth, almost feel his breath?
"I could handle that." His hand now held your door.
"I want to get to know you better too."
With that, he let go of your door and left you standing in the hallway, confused.
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babeyun · 1 day
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falling alone ✩ l.hs [teaser two]
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✩ series m.list | taglist form ✩ synopsis: cold cases were heeseung’s specialty, and he cracked every single one. cold hearts were your specialty, and you have yet to make a single chip in your husband’s. ✩ genre: established relationship au | hurt-comfort ✩ pairing: lieutenant!lhs x housewife!reader ✩ word count: 1.4k | [full fic: tbd] ✩ rating: 18+. minors dni. ✩ warnings: a little more pining between husband!hee & wife!reader, a bit of outsider help. nothing explicit ✩ author's note: hello everyone! i just wanted to let you all know that i am trying my best to get this fic out before the end of the year (and if i don't, i do go on winter break from uni in early december! so we can expect a few fics in that time.) this being said, i will add a taglist link here as well as the series masterlist because i cannot for the life of me keep up with urls at the moment. the people tagged below have already been added to said taglist, but if you wanna jump on and don't see yourself tagged, please fill out the form linked above! thanks!
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Heeseung knows that Dr. Bahng told him to leave work at work. However, Dr. Bahng said nothing about bringing home to work. He said nothing about thinking about you at work, or missing you, or daydreaming about you instead of analyzing the reports that a pair of rookies messed up. He also said nothing about reading articles by some sketchy romance columnist on how to keep your relationship alive, which is exactly what Heeseung was scrolling through right now. 
There are things in a relationship that must always be shared in order to avoid, or resolve conflict. How the other person is making you feel, how you are making them feel, and how to tackle both negative checklists properly. It is key to always remember that it must be you and your partner against the problem, not you and your partner against each other.
You make Heeseung feel…alive. You make him feel loved, cherished, and even at some bizarre times, worshiped. You make him appreciate waking up at the ass crack of dawn, your sleeping face relaxed as he peppers kisses across your warm skin – something he's thankful never manages to wake you up, but it adds to all the adoration he holds in his heart for you.
How does he make you feel? Dejected, neglected, rejected. Pushed aside for the true love of his life – work. You never bring it up unless he asks. You never brought it up until last July, when he was slumped in his office chair after drinking half a bottle of sherry whiskey, listening to music and thinking about yet another dead end that deterred him from finding Soyoung. You had approached him with a gentle gaze, a soft touch to his shoulder and asking about taking a shower together. You never questioned him, you never pressured him, you never tried to make him something you assumed he just wasn't – an attentive, doting husband.
And he remembers how he asked you, too. He remembers spinning around in his chair, asking you if he was everything you'd ever wanted. Asking you if he was living up to your expectations, as a husband, as a life partner, as a friend, even.
And he remembers the way you sighed carefully before perching on his desk. "You're everything I've ever wanted, and I'm sure you'll continue to grow and be even more deserving of the love I hold for you." You had smiled, your hand coming to rest on his cheek. "Nothing we can't work through, you know? If I was given a choice in another life, another world – I'd still choose you."
He will never forget it, and he can still feel the warmth of your lips against his as you led him to the bathroom. He can still feel the ache of your love on his skin from the way you held him under the running water, quietly basking in his presence as the mint of your shampoo filled his nose. Nothing is as special to him as you are. 
There are things that should routinely be shared in order to maintain a homeostasis of the calendar. Asking how their day was, if you have any ideas for dinner tonight, or if you'd like to do something this weekend to celebrate the mundane. It shouldn't be difficult to establish a routine with your partner, if you are in tune with them. A kiss goodbye in the morning, a warm embrace in the evenings. A shared meal, a shared bath, a shared bed. 
Heeseung can't remember the last time he fully checked in with you – you always have something to do. You always attempt new creative projects, and his fingers toy with the fabric of his slacks as he remembers that you hand stitched them. He thinks about how you waited for him all night yesterday, and the disappointment you must have felt when he arrived late. He thinks about how he just doesn't make time to tackle the problem that you two are constantly glossing over by being intimate – he knows you don't feel loved. 
He didn't ask you about your day yesterday, or the day before, or last week. He didn't ask you if you were sewing anything new, learning any new pieces on the piano collecting dust in the living room. He hasn't asked about your mother, but at least he knows you don't like to talk about her. 
Heeseung hasn't asked you a single thing about yourself, or your life, and he doesn't know how long it's been. Even last night, your eyes were focused entirely on him – the way his lips twitched when you said you liked the wine he chose, the way he pulled your leg over his in the booth you were sharing. You asked him about work, and he just shook his head as he pointed out the new menu items. 
You love him so selflessly.
Something that works for my partner and I is parallel play. We aren't necessarily doing something together, but we are present in the same room and doing our own thing. Knowing that he is there, and that if I need him, I can reach for him, adds a comfort to our relationship. Aside from this, we also come together every two weeks and address any issues we may be experiencing – both in our relationship and our individual lives. We resolve the issues about us together, and advise the other on our personal issues. Balance!
You do this a lot. If Heeseung is home, you'll wander to wherever he is and sit down where you can, and quietly go about your business. Sometimes it's a new cross-stitch, sometimes it's just putting a headphone in and listening to music. Sometimes you're giving yourself a pedicure, sometimes you're just sitting there staring at his corkboard of paraphernalia while matching your breathing to his. It was subtle, something you thought he'd never notice.
He sighs, exiting out of the tab before grabbing his coat off the back of his chair. Tugging it on, he uses one hand to log out of his computer when he hears three knocks on the door. A lightness of the rapping knuckles similar to yours…and your smiling face appears as you crack open the door. "Surprise?" He hates that he can't bite back his smile, a few of his fellow officers wide-eyed at his expression. He nods silently, and you extend your hand for him when you hear his coworkers whispering about you. With a dejected look, you tuck your hand back into the pocket of your jeans, "Guess we don't want them gossiping, right?" "Right." He mumbles, his own hand twitching around the doorknob as he pulls it shut behind him. He wants to reach for you, embrace the warmth you bring, show you off to the people he often calls his friends. Sunghoon catches his eye, a quizzical look on his face before shaking his head. 
Heeseung reaches for you, but you've already made your way towards the door. Your smile has lessened as you open the door, holding it for him. "How was work?" You ask as he joins you in the cool air, and he wastes no time wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you in close, his nose buried in your hair. You hesitate to wrap your arms around him, instead leaning back to try and meet his eyes. "Hee?" "Don't ask me about work." He mutters, before pressing his lips to yours softly. You let out a noise of surprise, but you can't melt into his touch before he pulls away. "I hate talking about work, let's talk about you. Over lunch." He takes your hand in his, gently pulling you to his side as he makes his way to the car. He doesn't see yours in the parking lot, so he only assumes you got a rideshare before you clear your throat. "Are you okay?" The words are slightly jumbled as he leads you to the passenger side, opening the door for you, helping you step in. "Hm? Why do you ask?"
"Well…you're actually out of the office. And you want to go to lunch…and you don't want to talk about work?" Your voice is meek, and it makes his chest ache as he reaches to buckle your seatbelt in for you. "I just want to spend time with you. Shall we?" His smile is a little forced, until he sees the soft gloss of embarrassment over your eyes. "Okay."
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BABEYUN © 2024. no translations, reposting or modifications are allowed. do not claim as your own. viewer discretion is advised. your media consumption is your responsibility.
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TAGLIST [those in red could not be tagged] @thesassy-mia @starfallia @ramenoil @hoonieversies @wintabite @shnnzsworld @eneiyri @jjongsha @ilovejungwonandhaechan @oopshee @capri-cuntz @petalsofink @teddybeartaetae @chocminteu @moon0fthenight @delvziion @heeseungthel0ml @bbyjw @marimariiiiiiii @thenastone
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hibiscusseaart · 2 days
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i wanna draw some ideas with AU or even write smth but I feel like shit :')
I'm gonna throw some hcs here and there
Also, question for you ppl! How do you think their kids would call their fathers? I hc that Tobirama refuses to go by any motherly terms (and to break Madara's heart, he doesn't like to be called 'wife' either).
Madara of course takes the more standard position of The Father cuz clan head and all that. Tobirama is more Tobimama cuz he was with their kids the most when they were little.
But I'm asking more traditional terms. Madara as Chichiue/otou-san and Tobirama as Tou-chan and 'papa' when they're little?
Oh and some endearment terms for the pair.
Tobirama uses A LOT of them. At first to convince everyone and especially Madara himself that he is actually in love and then he actually got used to it. Madara doesn't hear his own name from his husband much lmao
Before marriage he'd call him 'Beautiful' and tease him like "Ah, you wanna dance, pretty boy?". He noticed how well Madara reacts to praise, especially of his appearance since he had an ugly duckling phase and had complexes.
Maybe later before the peace treaty and engagement he'd call Madara 'fiancé', cuz the fucker promised
When they're kids he might've call him and "Madara-chan". I mean he still has the experience from his first life and he was around kids a lot and here's little madara running around looking all small cute and funny. Ofc he's Madara-chan or at least -kun.
To be clear Tobirama probably didn't feel anything romantic towards Madara before he turned at least 16, it'd be hella wrong otherwise. Like he trained kids his age before!
But he was definitely fond of him cuz let's be honest Madara is hella cute and funny kid. That was one of the reasons why Tobirama didn't actually kill Madara when he got there. He can't just kill an innocent kid even if he has the potential to destroy the whole world.
Oh and he def called baby Izuna "-chan " just cuz he's a baby too and to see him lose his shit.
So in marriage Tobirama would call Madara lot of endearments. My love, my dear, husband dear, darling, my heart and ect.
But he doesn't like all that mush like cutie patooty or whatever. I cant imagine Tobirama even saying word 'Pookie' 😭
not here kitten whiskers daddy will discuss it later
For Madara it's an interesting story
As kids he'd try to call Tobirama "his future wife" and got thrown in the river or the river was thrown at him. He didn't get the same reaction when he called him "his future husband". Tobirama just slightly nod and Madara would be so happy for the whole day.
He'd also tried to call him beautiful once, but got shy and ran away. Maybe to go fight Hashirama to fight off frustration on himself. He's a good shinobi and he can't even compliment the boy he likes!
But he would initiate some hand holding and even hugs. Even though Hashirama REALLY didn't appreciate it. He can allow hand holding. But hugs? Hell no, "Madara get your dirty hands away from my innocent baby brother!! >:((("
"Anija, please calm down, I don't mind hugging."
"I do!"
Basically this meme but with hugs and baby Hashirama
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When they had the fall out and Tobirama orchestrated meetings, he didn't use any terms and tried real hard to forget and bury his feelings cuz Tobirama is an enemy (even if he looks SO good when he fights)
He's an Uchiha and it didn't work. Especially cuz Tobirama still showed a lot of interest and tried to make peace.
Maybe once Madara would try to write some angsty poems about Tobirama's beauty and grace and how they couldn't be together because they're in warring clans. He thought he sucked so much but the poems are quite decent. Tobirama would appreciate it if he finds them.
After marriage he'd call Tobirama "Blessing" a lot. NOT bc of that Blessed AU that's circulating around, but just cuz he truly feels blessed that Tobirama chose him.
Oh and he'd be proud as a peacock to call Tobirama "His husband"
But when he's overwhelmed by feelings he'd be "my wife.... WIFE" - Tobirama really doesn't know where is it coming from, he's not even a proper wife by traditional japanese standards and he doesn't bottom much cuz he doesn't like the whole process of preparation (he's a busy man he can't stretch his ass for several hours straight)
also thinking about how after their deaths Madara's poems and letters to Tobirama while they were engaged but couldn't see each others and Tobirama's journal would be found and someone (probably some of their grand kids?) would edit it a bit and publish as a book as the most wholesome Romeo and Juliette story.
If Tobirama and Madara would get resurrected* again - they'd be like "THEY DID WHAT"
Especially Madara he'd be so embarrassed 😭
*it'd be a good thing for Tobirama to never actually leave any traces of this jutsu in the world, but he worried for his children and left them notes and some of his DNA in case something happens and Konoha needs saving or the whole world once again. Though maybe he'd made something of a counter seal (maybe a tattoo?) or counter jutsu that the person who summoned him wouldn't be able to control him.
ok I got it out of my system, i'm gonna go sleep now
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sunshines-child · 3 months
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Odysseus rn
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mattastr0phic · 5 months
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cerise-on-top · 7 months
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Got any Farah, Valeria, & Laswell hcs? Anything, really- I'm dying for my girls 🤲🤲🤲
Hello! Yeah, I was able to come up with a few! I already wrote a few for Valeria here! Somehow, I forgot to put them in my masterlist, though, which I have since fixed! Thank you for making me aware of this, though :-) These are general Headcanons, though, since I had an easier time coming up with those and because you didn't specify, I hope that's okay!
Valeria, Farah and Laswell HCs
Valeria: She’s always had quite the temper, even when she was young. While she may not have been spoiled to hell and back as a child, she usually got what she wanted, as long as it wasn’t something extraordinarily big, her parents always took care of her like that. Valeria loved her mother, they got along very well with each other, and she also took after her, having inherited her personality for the most part. Her father was a bit calmer than the two of them, but that didn’t mean they didn’t get along either. Whereas her mother would encourage her to do most things, her father would try to talk sense into her if it was a bad idea. She often sulked because of it, which is why she didn’t like her father as much as her mother, but as she got older she realized he meant well. Sometimes she still thinks about his advice, but the both of them died a long time ago, so most things they’ve told her are a distant memory by now. Valeria may be successful with what she’s doing and doesn’t like being told what to do, but sometimes she does wish she could still eat some sweets with her parents like she used to.
Joining the military actually wasn’t her first choice of career. She tried many places, but no one would take her, so she opted for the military, which welcomed her with open arms. She got paid. Not well, but she received the money, which was important since her parents couldn’t leave her with too much. They didn’t have very much either, so there wasn’t much to be inherited. Because she’s a woman, a few creeps tried to harass her, but she had none of it and beat all three of them up herself and on her own. Ever since that incident she wasn’t a big fan of the military either, but no other place would take her. However, it showed just how capable she was and earned her a lot of respect. A few other men would try to make advances towards her, but she shot them down every time. However, whenever another female soldier would jokingly flirt with her, that’s when she’d give it her all, making it her goal to fluster her beyond all hell. She’s spent a few evenings and nights with a few female soldiers, but was always willing to rip a male soldier’s dick off if he was being too friendly with her. During her time as a soldier she also realized that she preferred women.
She didn’t always hate Alejandro, actually. Back in the day, they got along very well. He was a man, yes, but he had enough respect for her. It wasn’t a given, even if it should have been, but she appreciated it. Whenever they sparred he gave it his all as well and never looked down on her. In his eyes, the two of them were equals and it showed. Valeria could appreciate that. She liked him, she spent a night with him but realized she hated that sort of stuff with men. He was the final realization for her that Valeria does not like men. It didn’t make her hate him at first, though. Only when he insisted on the two of them being a thing did she develop some form of disdain for him. Once she told him that she could never feel the same way, he stopped. However, he also started treating her a bit differently since he was in love with her. As he rose in ranks, he was a bit harsher on her than the other soldiers, usually dissatisfied with anything she did. He didn’t even notice that, but Valeria did. Therefore he became just another scum to her.
Farah: Before her town got attacked, she actually had a pretty happy childhood. She was sweet and kind as a kid, she got along well with her parents and her brother and she had a few close friends. Farah loved going outside to play, sometimes even inviting her parents to make potions with her in a bucket filled with water, sand and rocks. Her parents were always afraid of the Russians invading and tried to keep their children safe regardless of what happened, but in the end they were unable to. It hit Farah pretty hard, she loved her parents. Even now she misses them dearly since they always took such good care of her and her brother. At least she still had her brother. Farah knew she was the younger one out of the two of them, so she likely should have been the one to be protected, but once her town got attacked she became determined to make sure her brother would stay with her. Drastic times called for drastic measures, so she actually has killed people just so her brother could stay alive. It was around that time that other people realized how she was a very caring person still and could be trusted. Slowly, through that realization, she was able to gather a small force that could help her.
Farah is a pretty good leader. The people she works with adore her because, under that rough exterior, she’s still a good person. All her brothers and sisters know she can be trusted with just about anything. She rarely ever says no upon hearing a request of one of her people, knowing fully well what it’s like to need something. As she’s been through a lot herself, she always has an open ear for her brothers and sisters. While there’s not always time to listen to everyone’s concerns, if she does have time she’ll listen to you intently. Farah knows a lot more about her people than she lets on, that ranges from how the latest battle has gone to how her sister’s family is doing. She’s never one to turn down someone in need, always offering food and shelter. I know she may seem stern, because she has to be in order to be a good leader, but deep down she’s still the same kind girl that she’s always been. Her people would give up just about anything for her, and they do. One day, Farah dreams, Urzikstan will be free, it will be safe and it will prosper, its people won’t have anything to fear anymore. Trade will continue, the people will be happy and she can finally lay down her weary head and rest for a bit. But until then, she swore she’ll fight and fight until everything is finally over.
She’s never actually been in love. When she had the chance to develop a crush she was too young. Now that she’s older she doesn’t have time for anything lovey dovey in the slightest. Alex was the first person she ever developed a crush on. He may have seemed like an enemy at first, but it quickly enough became evident that that couldn’t be further from the truth. He was a good man, someone who could be trusted no matter what. He was loyal to a fault as well, which Farah could appreciate. However, she never told him, swallowing her feelings down instead no matter how intense they became. Yet, she sort of did always look forward to his small gestures of affection. Alex is a physically affectionate guy, so he’d sometimes pat her shoulder, put a hand on her shoulder or gently bump her arm to show he liked her. Farah is severely touch starved, so it made for a good combination. One time, he asked if she would like a hug, to which she said yes. To this day, Farah thinks about that hug since it was the first one she had received in seven or eight years. It may not have seemed like she was swayed at the time, but she was very content afterwards.
Laswell: Laswell’s parents didn’t really care too much for her. Don’t get me wrong, they provided for her physical needs, but they barely looked after her in any other regard, thinking she was happy because she had everything she could ever need. Laswell may have been strong because of it, even then, but she did wish her parents had cared more about other things as well, such as how she was doing emotionally. There were quite a few things that hurt her during her childhood, but she barely had anyone who would support her during her rough times. Her parents only ever wanted to see her happy and content, but barely made any effort to actually keep her as such. Laswell knew fairly early on that she was a lesbian and did come out to her parents, but that’s all that happened. It was never discussed again afterwards, even if her father would sometimes say that she would “find the right guy eventually” while talking to other people. Laswell has called him out on it numerous times, but he always made it about him and how he was the victim for saying something that made his daughter uncomfortable. Laswell didn’t stay in contact with her parents for very long once she moved out.
Even back when she was a child, Laswell knew she wanted to do something more exciting than be a hairdresser, waitress or cook. She wanted to do something with plenty of action, but at the same time she wanted to study and go to university. And thus she combined her wishes and started going to university at first. Afterwards, sometime in her twenties, she started to work for the CIA. She wasn’t treated with very much respect there at first, being a woman working there and all. But she didn’t let that disrespect get her down. In fact, on the outside, she stayed professional, but on the inside she took mental notes on who treated her badly and who didn’t. It soon enough became evident that Laswell knew what she was doing, even if her master’s degree should have been proof enough that there was some intelligence in that noggin of hers. However, soon enough she was transferred. In fact, she was transferred many times before she became a station chief, but it only showed just how competent she was in her field. Laswell has since saved thousands of lives and is proud of it. To her, such a thing is her calling and she wants to continue doing so for as long as she can, all the dangers be damned.
Laswell adores her wife. In fact, “Laswell” isn’t her original last name, she took that of her wife. At first they played with the idea of combining their names, but Laswell wanted fairly little to do with her parents at that point. Plus she wanted to show her father that she never “found the right guy”. So her being named Laswell is purely out of spite. While she may not be at home all the time, or very often, for that matter, she makes sure to bring her wife a gift every time she comes home. It can be something small, such as a souvenir she found while she was abroad, or it could be something along the lines of a golden ring that unfolds into an astronomical sphere. She needs to pamper her wife like that and make sure she knows Laswell loves her to the moon and back. Money isn’t an issue for her, she gets paid very well. Even if the biggest reward for her doing what she does is seeing her wife smile. Every time she sees her give her a big smile she’s reminded of why she does what she does, and that’s the most wonderful thing for her. Even so, not many people know about Laswell’s wife, only a select few do. It’s a safety measure since she knows people will target her. Although she’s a diplomatic kind of person, if anyone ever were to hurt her wife, then that person can be certain they’ll never walk freely among the sunlight again.
#cod#valeria garza#farah karim#kate laswell#if it was up to me I'd make Valeria and Laswell lesbians. and so I did because this is my blog#and because I wanna kiss them and cook them a nice and healthy meal that reminds them of me! I can't cook to save my life but I'll learn ho#Farah is into Alex so she isn't a lesbian in my book!#“a gay person's straight ship is the most powerful thing in the universe”#you can't tell me Alex wouldn't treat Farah right though! she deserves a guy like him who's hopelessly in love with her#sometimes I think about a poly relationship with the two of them because I love both of these characters dearly#just think about it: being hugged by two strong people at once! what's not to love about this concept?#cooking them a meal and receiving a kiss from the both of them oh god please someone wife me up already#Alex would get all three of you something cute and matching! like plushies!#he'd get a nice dog plushie. Farah gets a cat plushie. you get a plushie of an animal that reminds you of him that's still cute!#like a small bunny or a small birdie!#and just so you know both of them are good at hugging! they're both really strong and good at making you feel protected!#man I love Farah and Alex! they're such good characters! Alex was the first character I truly liked when watching MW1#I was so sad to see he wasn't in mw2 but!!! he's in MW3!!! My boy is back in business!#can I also just mention that you can play as Farah in MW3? isn't that also just so cool? again I squealed!#I squealed every time at the cafe I stayed at when I saw you could play as one of the girls! good thinking activision!
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imthursdaysyme · 7 months
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Arthur and Gwen at a sports game
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volatile-shorty · 1 year
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if all our love's now memories then was it meant to be if it leaves our hearts so instantly then was it make believe?
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killjoy-prince · 2 months
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I am sooooo close to being the keeper of the picture!! SO CLOSE!!!!!!!
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antaripirate · 1 year
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i have a habit of waking in the middle of the night with random insane theories about Threads and dumping it in my notes for me to find later…here are a few from the last few months…
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wintfleur · 7 months
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It’s actually criminal and unfair that I can’t watch the ones who live . . . like I’m just a girl you can’t do this to me 😾
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dixidin · 11 months
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The fact that we got the mf who saved Childe when he was in the abyss BEFORE Sandrone...... Sandrone lovers we are not making it outta this one are we?
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jamjumpingjambore · 1 year
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Ideals
Who wants to hear me talk outta my ass about philosophy and Trigun thoughts I’ve been forming over two years? No one? Too bad, I’m going to anyway--
Now that season one of Stampede is over, I’ve been seeing a lot of discussion over which twin is “correct”-- which is cool, I like analysis and debate (genuinely) -- but personally I think they’re both wrong. The twins are opposite ends of extremes, neither fully addressing the core problem of Plant use in a substantiable or ethical way.
[ Heavy spoilers for Trigun: Maximum and Trigun: Stampede. ]
(btw forgive me if I don’t use the correct terms, I was an art major, I’m working off vibes and vague definitions.)
Vash is too individualist and altruistic at his own expense. He believes in the best of humans, insistent on his solution of the butterfly-spider paradox being to “save both” and not letting anyone die. He puts up with the cruelest, ugliest parts of humanity just to keep more blood from spilling. Full disclosure, I also believe that humanity is inherently good, but I also acknowledge trauma, fear, and desperation can drive anyone to do horrible things. The people of No Man’s Land are struggling for survival. They were never meant to be here, never meant to live past The Fall, and yet they continue. Humanity always finds a way to prevail and unfortunately the only way they can in this situation is to wring the plants dry for every last drop, fighting over the scraps. 
They’re trapped between endless seas of sand and rock, the only non-synthetic food they have access to are massive bugs and blue emus. Luida’s flora wouldn’t be viable without extensive terraforming or construction of more glass domes-- a tall order when most of their manufacturing seams to be stripped ship parts and whatever the plants can fabricate. It makes sense for them to rely so heavily on them, and Vash isn’t incorrect in believing they need to work together to lessen that strain.
But in the past hundred years he hasn’t influenced any real systemic change. He treats the symptoms-- offering aid to individuals, families, sometimes even whole towns-- yet the clock keeps ticking. The child he brings back to their mother can suffer a living hell the moment he leaves, a town he visited before can have their plant break down again. NML has seven cities large enough to have their own governments. Knives basically puppeteers Ju-Lai through Conrad so he has the funds and resources to do stuff like create a whole-ass cult as a front for his plans and keep himself from becoming an active target. If Vash was smart he’d have tried to diplomat his way into a city too, but it feels like he’s too caught up in his complexes and fretting over what Knives is doing to really approach a situation where he’d have to compromise on long-reaching decisions.
Vash has to stop running and dig his heels in on something concrete. The planet will only get worse before it gets better and more plants will shrivel up in the meantime. Not everyone can be saved, no matter how badly he wants it.
Meanwhile Knives is too doomer/anarchistic/nihilistic, he thinks all of humanity is irredeemable, that they’ll just keep taking and taking until the entire planet is a husk. But they’re only taking so much because he caused the crash. If the fleet had succeeded in finding an earth equivalent-- or even landed on the planet intentionally-- the humans probably could have adapted to the ecosystem and utilized the plants more sustainably. They had to have a procedure for colonization, the Earth Federation fleet implies pockets of humanity had settled down comfortably elsewhere while the twins’ was still searching/struggling to survive. Knives also claims to want to protect Vash and their siblings, but he ends up doing the exact same unethical experiments and exploitation that the humans did to Tesla and the dependents. He forces/encourages Conrad to treat human children like lab rats, creating test tube babies like Elendria to eventually replace humanity with more pseudo-plants (which, damn, you can really read some Implications into that if you want), and then strips Vash down to becoming a tool-- a living generator to forcibly create more independents through the rift core.  
He does care about the plants, but he has a one-track mind. Knives just wants to fling his pain back tenfold, and he’d be happy sitting on a desolate rock with just his brother if given the chance. If he won, who would tend to the plants still dependent? How would he heal the dying plants if Vash remained a tree? What if some of the new independents were more like Vash and needed to eat? Could he justify making a plant produce again to feed another?
He could gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss himself through it all but he’d still be no different from humans-- and in the worst ways.
Knives also claims the sisters don’t have souls, but really? When they reach out to Vash throughout the flashbacks and on the steamer, do they not communicate? Something is shared in that moment. It may not be verbal but we know they can scream and the twins can hear it. They feel, and that’s enough to prove they deserve a minimum of respect imo.
In the manga there’s brief hints of characterization for the plants. One that sticks with me often is Vash referring to the runaway steamer’s plant as “the selfish little girl:”
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[Image ID: Manga panel of Vash, face close-up and covering his mouth with his hand, thinking and looking at the viewer intently. Dialogue: “I see.” “In other words... All I need to do is babysit the selfish little girl?”]
Admittedly It’s early in the series, in the Trigun chapter that first properly introduces them and the volumes that Trigun: Maximum frequently retcons parts of, but I still think it’s fascinating that a version of Vash would refer to one this way. Like he knows/assumes the plant is just throwing a temper tantrum-- and seeming to be correct as calming the plant down keeps it from overloading while the emergency brakes are pulled. Another big one is the flashes of the merged plants’ memories later on in Maximum. Dependents have had positive interactions with technicians and the humans they provide for alongside the cruelness. Knives is visibly shaken when he sees it; proof that unity’s not exclusively a sentiment of Vash’s. He ignores it and continues to decimate No Man’s Land in the last chunk of the story. Stampede Knives writes them off without ever being seen connecting with them.
Knives has never asked what the other plants wanted. Vash has never asked either-- nor relayed any messages between species. Not until the final confrontation in Maximum. 
The twins are in a unique position to serve as ambassadors between humans and plants. Rem thought so as well-- but she’s just as overly optimistic as Vash and flawed in other tragic ways. You can easily read her treatment of the twins as being fueled by guilt over Tesla and her clear favoritism towards Vash also contributing to Nai’s worldview in a myriad of little ways. But I think she had the right idea with them potentially emerging as an olive branch. I think a lot of the conflict on No Man’s Land would be helped if everyone could just sit down and talk to each other more often. People barely know plants are alive to begin with.
But Nai is dead and Knives’ most likely going scorched earth in season 2, while Vash is just now dealing with one of his most traumatizing moments of the series. The chance of these two ever reconciling is off the table (for now).
Which brings me to the after credits tease that made me physically throw shit across my room in excitement:
CHRONICA AND DOMINA, BABYYYYYYY!!
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[Image ID: Three panel manga sequence of independent plants Domina (woman with shoulder-length, mid-tone, messy hair), and Chronica (woman with long, light hair and parted bangs), having a conversation between their individual space shuttles over radio. Key dialogue from sequence-- Domina: “...Haven’t you already encountered many fused entities in the past?”]
I need you to understand every time I think about them I want to run around in circles like a zooted cat. There is SO MUCH potential with them and it’s a shame Nightow had to juggle their introduction with six other events at once in that breakneck third act with no room to explore their implications (I’ve already griped about Maximum’s ending here and to discord buddies, no need to rehash it again. It still has charm as is).
These two are the only other independent plants we see in the series. They’re part of the Earth Federation crew. Domina is implied to be younger and inexperienced while Chronica is a seasoned member who the ship captain constantly defers to for expertise in engaging rogue plants. Apparently the wacky fusion shit Knives does has happened before to lesser degrees and all current dependents have been genetically altered to be incapable of fusing to prevent it. Vash and Knives are around 150 years old and can fuse with the plants on NML. Their ship had two spontaneous dependent pregnancies within 50 years before the crash. It’s unclear how many fleets left Earth.
This opens a pandora’s box of fuckery that could have happened off-world in the span of 200+ years.
How many goddamn independents do we got running around? What’s the 4-1-1 on how other, successful/space-faring colonies treat their Plants?? Hey, why does it sound like independents consolidating power and being put down isn’t an uncommon thing---
Nightow can’t just drop this worldbuilding on me in the 11th hour and expect me to be normal about it.
The EF are shown to be competent but coldly strategic at times-- the captain almost nukes the planet in a desperate attempt to kill Knives despite his Ark being above the heavily crowded Octovern, the last city still standing after Knives’ assault. The greater good is most important, survival at all costs. Chronica expressly shares this sentiment, going forward with the plan to attack Knives first.
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[Image ID: Five panel manga sequence of Chronica and Domina arguing over whether to missile strike Knives over radio. Key quotes-- Chronica: “It is our top priority to gain the advantage through a preemptive strike.” “You must forget they were once a plant like us. Because that thing down there is a massive threat to us all.”]
Chronica acts like a solider. She sides with humans and enacts swift punishment on any threat, including her own species. She’s the worst compromise of the twins’ views, cruelty to protect human lives. Another form of exploitation.
Knives questions her loyalty through a fused Domina and almost forces her to chose between killing her or saving the flagship before Vash cuts his connection, but she never really interacts with them directly or is ideologically challenged again. She tries to take pot shots at the twins as they fly off as revenge for what Knives did to her partner but Livio stops her. Poor Domina doesn’t get to do much either, becoming a pile of feathers for the rest of her scenes. Hell I don’t even know if Vash knows there’s other independent plants running around now. Knives (predictably) just writes them both off as “slaves” and uses Domina like a spy camera from the moment she enters orbit.
I want to know more about them. My pie-in-the-sky hope for Stampede season 2 is they get larger roles and the twins have to deal with their existence more directly. I want to see Vash’s answer to weaponized plants, to grapple with the paradox happening on an intergalactic level and needing real solutions. I want Knives to squirm under the knowledge that an entire generation of plants were metaphorically castrated, that there are other plants like them who choose to serve humanity at every opportunity in spite of it.
I want Chronica to grab the ideological tug rope between them and start yanking them both over the line. Their black and white could be fun with some gray.
Sorry if this was ramble-y, I hope I got my ideas across okay. I have a lot of thoughts about this series and sometimes it’s hard for me to articulate them in a way that isn’t ramming two dolls together lmao
TL;DR: These self-destructive morons can’t hold a conversation and I am begging Studio Orange on my hands and knees, PLEASE let Chronica and Domina have more interaction with the boys and challenge their ideas about how humans and plants can/should coexist. I’m starving for an actually fleshed out Trimax ending.
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woundedheartwithin · 1 year
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You know, I’m a little worried that rgg is just planning on writing Yagami out of the next game
Mild spoilers under the cut
Given how popular the series was in Japan (due in no small part to who exactly portrayed Yagami), I don’t see them just hanging the series up in the event that Kimura Takuya’s agency refuses to come to the table. He was the initial draw, of course, but the series earned its own fan base in the west by having arguably the best writing and gameplay out of any Yakuza/RGG game to date. As much as I hate saying this, Kimura is not needed for another installment to be a success, especially given how viciously some folks seem to hate Yagami just in general, and Kimura’s agency is not giving rgg any reasons to believe that he’s not expendable
But from a canon point of view, LJ being set in Ijincho with Sugiura and Tsukumo’s shiny new detective agency is scary, actually, if you think about the implications, and the Kaito Files kinda confirmed it for me too. Sugiura, one of the main characters of both games, is now in Yokohama. Higashi, another main character in both games, opened another branch of Charles in Ijincho, as well (per the Kaito Files). The crew at Genda Law Office and Mafuyu’s roles in LJ were negligible, aside from Saori (who is technically a player character, and so a main character, and who stated in LJ that she felt like she was being underestimated by both her client and her coworkers)
Kaito, yet another main character, has a brand new family, and there is no way Mikiko actually agreed to move into Kaito’s shitty Kamurocho apartment with all her money and whatever money she got from her dirtbag husband’s estate. That leaves an opening for Kaito to just move to Yokohama with his family. And Yokohama 99 only has one field detective and a pretty high profile win under their belt, so honestly I don’t think it’s all that much of a stretch to see Kaito start working there instead because they need the manpower, and Kamurocho is now too far away to reasonably commute. It’s also pretty reasonable to assume that Jun already goes to school in Yokohama (hell he and Mikiko probably live there) because of his father’s connections with the city (that reunion being held at the Blu Marino every year). I don’t think it was ever explicitly stated that Sadamoto was based in Yokohama, but the implication is there
Not to mention, if the series moved to Ijincho full time, Yagami has stated that he likes working and living in Kamurocho, and his only remaining father figure is still there. I don’t see him leaving, even for Kaito
Idk it’s kinda scary honestly, because Yagami is far and away my favorite character (for more than just his looks I promise), and I love the other characters with all my heart, but I do not want to see Yagami just left behind in Kamurocho while the gang up and moves to Ijincho. And with the whole Saori being engaged to Hoshino angle, I could totally see that souring and Saori bailing to Yokohama as well, especially since she’s expressed quite a bit of discontent at being overlooked and underestimated already. If her relationship with Hoshino goes belly up, I could see her stepping back from Genda’s office entirely and moving to get a fresh start
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ladymacbeths · 1 year
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Macbethposting Friday anyway I am thinking about the come you spirits etc etc and just… the implications of it all. Lady Macbeth’s motivations to do the Thing aka kill Duncan aka have Macbeth be king aka be queen herself are never cleared up and only there to be built with clues. But in any case— whether self-serving or altruistic (wanting it for Macbeth not herself)— it’s something extreme.
Extreme enough to make her want to rid herself of her very nature to achieve it. She’s insane 2 me bc she’s self-aware but not self-aware enough to know that going against who she really is will end terribly. But thing is that she Knows that she, as she is, with the qualities she has Now, won’t be able to do it. She’s desperate enough to say “okay, make me able to do it then. Rid me of my nature. Make it impossible for me to prevent myself.”
Like, the Thing that makes her do it, whatever it is, has to be big enough to get her to That Level and I fear there’s too little talk of… what it could be that also makes sense.
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the-kipsabian · 2 years
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