#||musings: ferus olin||
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mayxthexforce · 15 days ago
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@mutatiio
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Ernest Hemingway, from his novel titled "A Farewell To Arms," originally publ. in 1929
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legends-expo · 1 year ago
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Photo by Bekah Marie Photo
When Subtext Is Text, Musings On Ferus Olin
It's the end of Pride month, and Legends Con Executive Director Katherine is taking the opportunity to talk about one of her favorite characters (and most recent cosplays), Ferus Olin. Ferus is one of the canonically queer characters in the Star Wars Legends timeline; and is, in her humble opinion, one of the most interesting representations of a queer character within the Star Wars universe.
Ferus comes from the Jude Watson books, first appearing in her Jedi Quest series and later leading the series Last of the Jedi. He also appeared in the Rebel Force series as a supporting character. All three of these series are Scholastic chapter books, published between the years of 2001 and 2010. They are progressive for their time in many ways, but are ultimately also a product of their time in how Ferus as a queer character is defined on the page. The line between subtext and text can be debated, but we have author confirmation via Twitter that Ferus is gay and married to Roan Lands. Roan was referred to as Ferus's "partner" throughout the Last of the Jedi and Rebel Force series. With these books being written throughout the 2000s, that was the current terminology used for gay couples at the time- and marriage was not even a legal option within the United States.  
The term partner is really only the beginning of the signs we see in-text that Ferus and Roan are a couple. The most interesting of those to me is this passage from the first book in the Last of the Jedi series. Obi-Wan has just rescued Roan from Imperial prison after both Ferus and Roan were arrested for leading rebel activities and separated within the prison. As part of the misadventures that occurred with Obi-Wan and Ferus after that, they are forced to temporarily leave behind the planet Bellassa where Ferus had been living with Roan. While in space Ferus and Obi-Wan talk about how Ferus resigned from the Jedi Order (that’s another story entirely, I don’t want to get too off track here)
“It doesn’t matter,” Ferus said. “I walked away. It was the most difficult thing I ever had to do, but in a way I’m glad it happened.”
“You’re still a Jedi, Ferus.”
“No,” Ferus said slowly. “I’m not. I can never really be a Jedi again. Not just because I left the Order.” He looked back in the direction of Bellassa. “I have attachments.”
“Once there was something I wanted, something forbidden by the Jedi code,” Obi-Wan said. “Qui-Gon said something to me then. He said, maybe in a different galaxy things will change. The Jedi will change. Here is the change Ferus. And I think… in the new order, attachments will be a strength. Maybe this is how the galaxy will be saved. So yes, you are still a Jedi.”
Obi-Wan is referring to events of the Jedi Apprentice books, also by Jude Watson, where he entered a brief romance with one of his fellow Padawans, Siri Tachi. Obi-Wan and Siri decided to end their relationship due to the Jedi code, which led to that conversation with Qui-Gon. In the text this is Ferus saying that his relationship with Roan is outside the bounds of the Jedi code, and Obi-Wan draws a parallel to a romantic relationship of his own. I personally would call this plain text rather than subtext based on both the context in-universe and the context that this was written in 2005.
Throughout the story there are more signs that while subtle, Ferus and Roan’s relationship is romantic. It's the way they tease each other, care for each other, and little snippets about their life together-
Read more on our Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/post/When-Subtext-Is-Text-Musings-On-Ferus-Olin-K3K8MRUH1
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polgarawolf1 · 1 year ago
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Barriss Offee Day - Character Study
Sorry for the wonky format - it's because I'm too wordy for Tumblr's limits to have all my notes formatted like I want them to be!
This is rough and not really edited (the title is just a working title right now!), but I'm posting now because it's Barriss Day today!
I feel as if I can't say this enough: please be aware that this character study piece is meant to go along with a SW AU series of mine that I've been writing in, off and on, since the same summer that RotS came out in theatres! This is my headcanon Barriss for that specific AU series, which is my main SW AU series, so she's based mostly on the old SW EU (or Legends, as DISNEY calls it) with some of the newer DISNEY!SW canon adapted enough to be useful to me/make sense given that she's a Jedi Healer, but she's still an AU version of both versions of the official SW Barriss Offee character!
Title: “Barriss Chanah Offee: Jedi Healer and Jedi Commander”
Pairing: None as yet, though Kornell “Uli” Divini definitely has an enormous crush on Barriss during their shared time at Rimsoo (Republic Mobile Surgery Unit) 7, on Drongar, during the Clone Wars.
Rating: Uhm, probably a borderline PG-13, maybe (?)
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Star Wars, more’s the pity! What I do have is an extremely contrary muse that refuses to shut up and leave me alone . . .
Summary: This is thirty-three random but chronological moments from the life of Barriss Chanah Offee, a strongly Force-sensitive Mirialan given to the Coruscanti Jedi Temple for training as an infant. Barriss is technically not quite an agemate of Anakin Skywalker’s, though she’s often grouped with those who are. She becomes close friends with Ahsoka Tano over the course of the Clone Wars and is generally known for her empathetic heart, her healing touch, her calm and grace, and her unshakeable loyalty to her friends and Jedi family. There is an actual story here – one small thread among the vast woven tapestry of life that is the living history of the galaxy, stretched out and twisted, knotted into the whole, curled down among the roots of time, connecting various moments together – but one must read between the lines to capture it. It is not precisely the truth, for the subtle story of these moments is sketched out here in words, and, in the sin of writing down a life, it inevitably changes the shape of things. But it is nevertheless a form of truth. (From a certain point of view . . . )
Warning: This story functions as a sort of compressed codex for Barriss Chanah Offee’s life, as she has been and is going to be written (or at least referred to) in my not even nearly complete AU Star Wars series You Became to Me. If anything doesn’t make sense, please, feel free to ask!
Author’s Notes: 1.) For anyone interested, this not-quite-a-story is compatible with my SW AU series You Became to Me, including the trilogy Thwarting the Revenge of the Sith, if you squint at a few things sideways and view a couple others solely through the lens of Barriss’ eyes. This is probably also technically compatible with a lot of other potential AU ’verses where the Clone Wars do not, ultimately, end up going like Sidious plans, but the majority of it should be at least mostly consistent with the old EU (barring what I’ve altered about Ferus Olin, etc.), at least up until roughly the Battle of Coruscant during RotS.
2.) My Barriss is and has always been based on the version of the character as she originally appeared in certain scenes/cut scenes for AotC and RotS and was initially written in the old EU, prior to the reboot for the Clone Wars period associated with the animated film and TV series. Thus, she’s closer in age to Anakin Skywalker than she is to Ahsoka Tano, a natural Jedi Healer, and does not end up falling prey to despair and the Dark Side and bombing the Coruscanti Jedi Temple, as is portrayed in Star Wars: The Clone Wars. I have made some concessions to the version of Barriss found in Star Wars: The Clone Wars and the current DISNEY!SW version of canon – she is about a year younger than in the old EU, for example, and does take part in some missions/battles that also involve Ahsoka and Anakin – and I am technically in the midst of revising/expanding Thwarting the Revenge of the Sith to include some more characters from the show, but please be aware that my main SW series is an AU and so certain characters and events and the timeline for the prequels/the war in general involve a slightly different/longer timeline as well as multiple changes from what’s depicted in the show (and even in the old EU, occasionally).I’m aware that Barriss is considered a Muslim-coded character, in large part due to the show, though it’s rather horrifying for me to consider that Filoni et al apparently made the choice to present her as being coded this way and yet still deliberately turned her into a terrorist bomber.
Please be aware that, since I first started writing what would become my Thwarting the Revenge of the Sith trio shortly after Revenge of the Sith first came out in theatres and I saw it and read (as fairly new hardbacks) both the novelization for RotS and James Luceno’s Labyrinth of Evil (which, for those who don’t know, acts essentially as an immediate predecessor for RotS) and I had it in my head from fairly early on that my AU ’verse would (eventually) involve the survival of a useful version of bota and, thus, Barriss Offee as a Jedi Healer (as I’d already read the MedStar duology by this point), a lot of my personal headcanon for Barriss (and also, by extension, for her Jedi Master, Luminara Unduli) and for Mirialan culture in general predates by at least three-four years both the start of the show and my awareness of the fact that she’s considered Muslim-coded. (It took me several years before I ever watched any of Star Wars: The Clone Wars and I am not a techy person, so it’s probably more like ten years plus before I had any actual personal knowledge from watching the parts of the show that include the ret-conned version of Barriss.) If anyone has any questions or is upset or bothered by anything, please let me know!
3.) Although this is technically modeled on part of a prompt set that I found ages ago and made a copy of from somewhere or another on the LJ, it’s not really meant to function as a response to whatever the challenge actually is or was that’s associated with said LJ prompt set. I just used the specific prompts to give me a reason to string together a backstory of sorts for Barriss and, since I’m working under a time constraint for the Barriss Day celebration, it’s entirely possible that I’ll come back to this and expand on it at some point in the future.
4.) Readers interested in knowing who the physical models are for EU characters (such as Uli Divini) or for original characters (like Jedi Shadow Knight Leyala Riani), for that matter, should please just probably ask me, rather than consult the latest versions of my posted lists of cast original and EU characters and for handmaid(en)s and other important Nabooian characters, which are available on my LJ, since I need to update all of them and what’s on the LJ (https://polgarawolf.livejournal.com/) is very old! Please note that characters who may be alluded to but not referenced by name (certain family members of original characters, for example) are considered too minor to be cast at this time, and that readers should feel free to imagine them howsoever they wish!
5.) Mirialans are considered near-human (they are cross-fertile with human norms in the EU and, likely, with many other types and/or species of near-humans, as well) and resemble human norms closely enough, physically, that I’ve always considered they may very well have originally evolved from human norms due to specific conditions found on their homeworld, Mirial (many of the “near-human” species in the GFFA seem to be humans with just enough genetic differences – from adapting to living on specific worlds/moons, mostly – and/or just enough cultural differences from more generic human norms to have been given a specific label, based on their homeworld). I mention this here because my headcanon is that Mirialans essentially age/mature like human norms do and also because I believe the tradition of Mirialan Jedi Knights/Masters taking on Mirialan Jedi apprentices is based on wanting to pass on direct knowledge of Mirialan culture and Force-based spirituality, not any form of xenophobia.
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“Barriss Chanah Offee: Jedi Healer and Jedi Commander”
01.) Incidence: Though one would hardly guess it, from the raw numbers alone (evident humans or human norms outnumbering so many other known sentient species in the galaxy by such a large margin), statistically speaking, as an entire species, Mirialans have an even higher overall incidence of sensitivity to the Force than human norms do (most likely due to the fact that survival on Mirial, their largely cold, dry homeworld, requires them to be more naturally in tune with their surroundings – and, thus, more open to the Force and its influence – than most of the worlds and moons where humans have proven both willing and able to settle); this greater percentage of Force-sensitives doesn’t always translate individually to higher levels of stronger Force-sensitivity, though, meaning that there are many Mirialans who make their homes both on Mirial and elsewhere who have midi-chlorian levels that are higher than average and yet still lower than is generally required for admittance to the Jedi Order for training, and so the number of Mirialan Force-sensitives in the Jedi Order is lower than that of human norms (and, indeed, several other types of near-humans, as well), enough so that the Mirialans in the Order thought it would be best to establish a tradition whereby Mirialan Jedi Knights/Masters would, whenever possible, take on Mirialan apprentices to train, so that Mirialan culture and customs could be taught directly from Master to Padawan, along with Jedi traditions and training.
02.) Process: Barriss Chanah Offee is found not on Mirial or any other inhabited planet, moon, or station, but rather on a starliner in deep space, by a Jedi not on a traditional Search but rather simply en route to Coruscant after a successful undercover mission in the Corporate Sector, who is still in the process of settling back into her own skin (after living under a false identity for the better part of four months rather than as Jedi Knight Leyala Riani) and is rather startled to find herself called to the ship’s infirmary, where a routine blood test given to a newborn has yielded a midi-chlorian count easily high enough to justify admittance to the Jedi Order for training (the infant is named by her tearful parents, given a slightly modified traditional blessing, and then promptly given over to the Jedi Shadow, who manages, after only a handful or so of incidences of usual unexpected interruptions, to safely get both herself and the by then several month old baby to the Coruscanti Temple).
03.) Routine: Barriss’ first real memories are of the Jedi Temple’s crèche – of having patient, kindhearted Jedi Carers helping her with her meals and with the layers of her youngling robes, modelled after the traditional Mirilian dress of a Force-sensitive spiritualist leader-in-training and a little more complicated than many of the robes worn by her crèchemates and friends; of accidentally running into a friendly Jedi Tender during a game of tag and being sent laughingly back to the proper Sept or age-group of her Initiate Clan; of going practically everywhere in a crowd of younglings, all in the same age-group or Phratry if not necessarily all belonging to the same Clan; of having a compassionate Twi’lek Docent gently drying her eyes after taking a hard tumble and spilling the contents of her lunch tray seemingly everywhere; of entering the Halls of Healing for a routine inoculation and being drawn to the Healing Crystals blazing with the Force in the hands of a gifted Jedi Healer, who, noticing her rapt attention, promptly made a notation in her permanent file indicating an interest in and likely proclivity towards Force healing – and of Master Yoda, watching her with a pleased, benevolent smile as she uses the Force to retrieve a favorite toy (a blue ball, just the right size for her small hands and exactly the same vivid color as her own eyes) gone astray, bouncing from the crèche out through an antechambers and into one of the main large open spaces of the Temple proper.
04.) Manage: Crèche Masters and other Jedi whose calling place them either exclusively in the crèche or else mainly in the Temple as trainers and teachers – the Jedi Carers and Tenders who specifically look after the younger Initiates; the Clan Leaders who are in charge of the various Initiate Clans and the Sept Heads who manage the specific Septs or age-groups of those Initiate Clans; and the Jedi Instructors and Pandits, as well as certain Jedi Artisans, who lead specific classes, training courses, and hands-on modules for both younglings in the crèche and Padawans who’re still in training – routinely go out of their way to offer both methods and means by which individual Initiates and Padawans can learn about and even (to an extent, at least) incorporate the cultures of the specific peoples and species from which they hail in their day-to-day activities and lives, though of course no one is ever forced to learn or to do anything in regards to such a culture if that individual finds a tradition or custom uncomfortable: Barriss thoroughly enjoys such cultural seminars (including almost all of the more generic modules that cover other near-human and humanoid cultures), though she takes it for granted that, if she eventually trains as a Jedi Knight (and eventual possible Master) instead of joining one of the branches of the Jedi Service Corps, she will eventually be taught more about Mirialan culture and spirituality when she’s taken on as an apprentice by a Mirialan Knight or Master.
05.) Path: Her personal path forward as a Jedi – whether as a Knight and possible future Master or as a member of a branch of the Jedi Service Corps – would be easier (or at least more assured) if she were only drawn towards healing or if she were only drawn to the path of Knighthood, since then she could either declare for the Medical Corps or else focus more on what would make her more likely to be chosen as a Padawan; however, she feels equally drawn towards both callings, which is somewhat problematic, given that all of the Mirialans currently in or associated with the Order are either younglings like her or else they’re members in good standing of one or another of the branches of the Jedi Service Corps or Knights or Masters of the Order, meaning that there are currently no Jedi Healers who are either Knights or Masters who are also Mirialan.
06.) Honor: When Luminara Unduli – a Mirialan Jedi Knight and a Master by courtesy (given that she is currently helping an orphaned Commenorian Padawan by the name of Suanne Tephee through what should, hopefully, be the last handful or so of years of training and preparation necessary to make her ready/able to pass the Trials of Knighthood) – approaches her, Barriss fears, at first, that she will be forced to make a decision between eventually training towards Knighthood and training as a Jedi Healer that, in her heart, she knows she cannot make and does not feel as if she should be forced into trying to make, either (she understands, logically, that, since the annihilation of the Sith and their Brotherhood of Darkness and the consequent end of the New Sith Wars, the so-called “restructuring” of the Galactic Republic and the Jedi Order by the Ruusan Reformations essentially dissolved the Jedi Army of Light and stripped the Jedi of much of their authority and power in the galaxy just when the Jedi would be most needed, out in the greater galaxy, in order to help heal the wounds of that disastrous and exhaustively extensive conflict, meaning that the pathway of Jedi Knights all but instantly became much more important than it had been even at the height of the war. That Barriss can understand it rationally, though, does not mean that she has to like the fact that, in almost thousand years since then, the prestige of being a Knight has grown so much that the pressure on Jedi Initiates to choose that particular pathway [whether it would suit them as individuals or not] has concomitantly increased, too, to the point where younglings consider themselves to be failures if they aren’t chosen as Padawans and instead end up in one of the branches of the Jedi Service Corps, such as the MedCorps, even though Jedi likely to be injured in combat logically would need trained Healers to tend to their injuries and Jedi Healers are, frankly, able to do things with the Force to help preserve life and speed healing that even the most gifted and experienced of non-Force-sensitive Healers simply cannot do); happily, though, Master Unduli indicates that, if Barriss continues to show excellent progress in her training as an Initiate and she is willing, Luminara will happily arrange for her to have further training in the healing arts with Jedi Healers if Barriss will do her the honor of one day becoming her apprentice.
07.) Attention: Although Barriss normally tends to listen to others more than she talks (except for in classes when she knows the answer to whatever the instructor happens to be asking and she’s not sensing anyone else particularly wanting to be the one to be called on to answer, of course), the Jedi Order is essentially one enormous extended family of choice made up of many, many generations of interlinking lineages of trained Force-sensitives and many more who might, one day, be given the choice to join and extend those lineages, so there actually are very, very few real (serious) secrets among its members (it’s not so much that Jedi are prone to idle chatter as it is misleading to claim that Jedi are too good – or too snobbish and self-important – to gossip when, at least most of the time, there’s simply no need for idle chatter or rumormongering when it comes to the vast majority of incidences that happen both in the Temple and during mandated missions since both any official reports and private, individual deductions and conjecture about such occurrences tend to all quickly become known by virtually everyone who’s paying even a modicum of attention to the Force – which, after all, is naturally constantly being influenced and shaped by the thoughts and actions of basically all living creatures, especially those strong in the Force, and also frequently quite deliberately being outright given strong emotions, both negative and positive, by Jedi who want to establish better control over themselves – and/or what’s going on around them in the Temple, including what individual Jedi are actually physically telling the High Council about their specific missions, when they return from them, and what those same individuals are also either gleefully spinning stories about or else quietly complaining about outside the Council Chamber) and, since scandals (or even just possible indignities or outrages) tend to spread at a speed easily comparable to that of light, especially when a Temple favorite or a favorite of Yoda and/or one of the other High Council Masters is involved, she’s well aware of (and has opinions about) Qui-Gon Jinn and his tendency to essentially blame everything on the will of the Force (often quite blatantly in order to win arguments or to get away with doing or not doing something he really shouldn’t be allowed to do or to shirk doing) long before he brings an almost ten-year-old boy by the name of Anakin Skywalker to the Temple and shocks everyone by telling the High Council that he ought to be allowed to take the youngling on as his apprentice (even though he already has a perfectly wonderful Padawan, one who, so far as Barriss can tell, most of the residents of the Temple all agree Qui-Gon Jinn does not deserve. She’s heard so many incredible stories about Obi-Wan Kenobi that, if she weren’t Mirilian, if Master Unduli hadn’t already spoken to her about becoming her Master, and if she weren’t aware of the fact that there’s at least one youngling, just enough older than her to be in the next age-group up from her, who’s made it extremely well known that he believes himself destined to one day become Obi-Wan’s Padawan, Barriss might actually be tempted to try to catch Obi-Wan’s eye, in hopes of eventually being asked to be his apprentice) because the boy’s midi-chlorian count is supposedly so high that (according to Jinn, who’s widely known, much like his former Master, Yannis Dooku, to be just a little bit too interested in Force prophecies, to the point where some claim that they’re both obsessed, to unhealthy degrees, with Jedi mystics and the records of their so-called “visions”) it must mean that he’s the Chosen One.
08.) Potential: Anakin Skywalker blazes in the Force like a star that’s somehow continually going nova – there’s no disputing this fact and Barriss honestly doesn’t see the point in even trying – but he’s simultaneously far too old for the crèche and both too untrained and too young to become the Padawan apprentice of anyone expecting to go on any active missions outside of the Temple for likely several years to come, and, from everything she’s heard, he also pretty clearly doesn’t have the right sort of temperament to become a Jedi (he’s afraid, but he not only won’t admit to it, he refuses to acknowledge his fear and even outright lies to the Council about what he’s afraid of/for and why; he’s unabashedly angry when the Council Masters try to point out that he’s not telling the truth about his fear and, worse, he behaves as though the Council Masters are the ones at fault for pointing out his lie, rather than him for his dishonesty; and he’s undeniably all too attached to the single parent he’s ever known, who has, for some reason, been left behind – in slavery, as it eventually comes out, months after the fact, when it also becomes widely known that Skywalker’s mother was left behind due to the fact that, even though Qui-Gon Jinn apparently thought nothing of gambling with the lives of others and even the potential wellbeing of an entire system’s worth of imperiled people, if it meant that he could legally take Anakin with him, even if it meant that he would have to take him as a slave, he evidently didn’t quite care enough to cheat on the bet that he made with Anakin’s owner sufficiently to include the boy’s mother in his potential winnings, along with the boy. There are many people in the Order, besides Barriss, who are quite upset, if perhaps not necessarily all that surprised, to learn about these facts, and many of them also feel sorry for the boy, though it’s difficult to maintain much empathy for someone who so clearly has a chip the size of a Hutt on his shoulder about his background – on Tatooine, a Hutt-controlled world in the Outer Rim Territories that Barriss is fairly certain she’s never even heard of, before, and which turns out to almost be far enough out to qualify as bordering on Wild Space), so she honestly doesn’t understand why it’s ever even a question whether or not Skywalker should be accepted for Jedi training (either with or without Qui-Gon Jinn), high midi-chlorian count or not and prophecies of the Chosen One or not, not when, if anything, Skywalker seems far more suited to something like the Exploration Corps.
09.) Secret: Barriss honestly can’t decide which piece of news from Naboo is more shocking and upsetting – that the Sith not only apparently survived Ruusan, somehow, but have continued to survive in secret for almost a thousand years and have not only revealed themselves now, in the process all but proving that they’ve been involved in some way with the Naboo Crisis, but have also killed a Jedi Master in the process, or that, following the death of his Master at the hands of one of those Sith, Obi-Wan Kenobi evidently not only swore that he would fulfill his Master’s dying wish and take on Anakin Skywalker as his Padawan, with or without the approval of the High Council (and, thus, the legitimacy and backing of the Jedi Order), but that he essentially told Master Yoda this (in effect essentially blackmailing the Grand Master of the entire Jedi Order into allowing him to apprentice Anakin, once he’d been acknowledged as a Jedi Knight, for having defeated and slain the Sith Lord who’d just murdered his Master) – but she knows that she’s not the only one who thinks that Knight Kenobi has gone from somehow having a Master who definitely didn’t deserve him to having a Padawan who almost certainly doesn’t deserve him, either, and she finds herself in the rather unexpected position of feeling sorry for Ferus Olin, currently one of the most popular and widely respected younglings near to her age in the crèche (even if, to be honest, she’s always felt somewhat ambivalent towards the slightly older boy. Ferus generally gives every indication of being a good sort, but everything always seems to come awfully easy for him, in a way that doesn’t feel quite right, somehow, and the way that some of the other younglings act around him – like they’d cheerfully do anything he might ever even think of asking them to do – makes her feel weirdly almost vulnerable, in a way that both bewilders her and makes her want to avoid him altogether, which makes it strange to feel sorry for him now), since a Jedi can only have one Padawan at a time and this means that (short of Anakin Skywalker somehow dying in the next two years or so, which she would never want to happen, no matter how messed up the whole situation with him and newly Knighted Obi-Wan Kenobi might be, and which seems extremely unlikely to happen, anyway, since he’s not likely to make it back out of the Temple again until he’s made a serious effort to catch up on all that he’s behind on, from having come to the Order so comparatively late in life and from almost certainly having a less than thorough education on Tatooine, even if that’s not exactly his fault) Ferus Olin can never become Obi-Wan Kenobi’s Padawan.
10.) Sense: One would think that a boy from a desert world would know better than to allow himself to be goaded into accepting a challenge involving swimming, of all absurdly unsuitable things for him to try to do, but then, Skywalker does seem to be rather more emotional than any Jedi with sense would ever allow themselves to be, so perhaps the overly emotional numpty will prove her wrong and actually manage to get his fool self killed at some point while essentially confined to the safety of the Temple and Obi-Wan Kenobi will once again be free to choose his apprentice by himself (rather than being stuck with his former Master’s choice, which is just so many different levels of wrong that it makes her want to grind her teeth down to dust for sheer frustration over the fact that Qui-Gon Jinn is dead and now she’ll never have a chance to get away with telling him to his face that he’s an arrogant, self-centered twat) and Ferus Olin will prove to have been right all along and will become Knight Kenobi’s new Padawan.
11.) Behind: Skywalker may very well be behind on essentially everything except for anything having to do with mechanics, droids, maintaining all sorts of different kinds of vessels (from basic skimmers to advanced starship fighters), and piloting in general – the stories about how he managed to accidentally destroy the Trade Federation’s Lucrehulk-class Droid Control Ship are entirely too crazy to be made up and actually makes Barriss want to like him, despite everything else (the Trade Federation did horrible things to her homeworld: as a Mirilian, she feels all but honor-bound to side with someone who’s had such an important role in thwarting their plans to do the same sort of awful things to another inhabited world and system, even if she’s starting to wonder if the High Council Masters only allowed Knight Kenobi to take Skywalker on as his Padawan learner just to keep him somewhere they could keep an eye on him and be sure that the Sith would have a hard time trying to get to him. Knight Kenobi might have killed the one Sith, but the general consensus is that there should have been two of them, meaning that the surviving Sith would have multiple reasons to be interested in a boy like Skywalker, who’s so strong in the Force, so emotional, and has the kind of traumatic background he has, especially since the Sith were so clearly involved in the Trade Federation’s plans for invading and conquering Naboo) – but it seems as though he’s a natural with a lightsaber and, much to her surprise, she finds herself enjoying the times when she’s practicing in the salles at the same time that he is, in part because it’s astonishingly fun to see how quickly he picks up many of the different formal katas meant to help students master some of the different forms of lightsaber combat and partially because he’s such a shockingly unpredictable fighter, when turned loose to spar instead of just practicing basic katas, that he seems determined to combine apparently random bits of various katas from entirely different combat forms (so it’s always interesting to see which combination of moves he attempts will or won’t actually work together, whether she’s the one who’s been tasked to spar with him or not, though some of his more disastrous efforts make her very, very glad that training ’sabers aren’t actually strong enough to do much worse than singe fabric. Sometimes, it’s even more fun – and even instructional, when some combination of moves that doesn’t seem as if it ought to work actually does – to watch than to be the one trying to match his unpredictability. They don’t really talk, much, but it doesn’t truly bother her, since she’s of the opinion that sparring partners are actually more useful when they aren’t also friends who might be tempted to hold back out of fear of hurting each other’s feelings), which tends to make sparring against him a nice challenge, even if he does tend to win a ridiculous number of bouts for someone so new to Jedi training.
12.) Fear: Her Healer training is going well – in addition to the more basic courses required of basically all Jedi Padawans, she studies under a handful of different Healers, based on who’s available when and who specializes in or knows more about what, all of them operating under the oversight of Master Healer Vokara Che, who’s already made it quite clear that she expects Barriss to one day join the Circle of Jedi Healers, which is simultaneously both a wonderful and a mildly terrifying thing to know, since the Circle is comprised of the most gifted and powerful and absolute best of all Jedi Healers – she’sfound her kyber crystal in the ice caves of Ilum and successfully built her own lightsaber, and Master Unduli is evidently so pleased with her overall progress that she’s already talking about how best to coordinate things so Barriss shouldn’t fall behind in her Healer training when they undertake her pilgrimage to Mirial (a time-honored sort of rite of passage generally undertaken around fifteen or so standard years of age), but Barriss is beginning to fear that her apparent inability to keep ahold of her new lightsaber long enough to truly master even the most basic of katas is going to end up rendering the entire issue moot and her apprenticeship with Master Unduli void when a Jedi Knight, noticing her struggles with her lightsaber in one of the smaller, less often frequented training salles, introduces himself as Tutso Mara (actually Tutsoded Bayardeth Mara, though few refer to the half Kiffar and half Chalactan Jedi by his full name, at least according to Knight Mara) and then kindly shows her the proper hand grip for her lightsaber (after which, with her permission, he physically adjusts and readjusts and keeps on readjusting her grip until Barriss finally has it down pat and her grip – evidently adequate enough for a training ’saber but not at all sufficient for the power of a real blade – is no longer throwing her off, no matter which training kata from which form of lightsaber combat she attempts), sparking a mentorship and eventual friendship that will push her to learn a Jar’Kai version of Djem So (a combat form using two lightsabers or a lightsaber – be it a single or a double blade – along with a shoto) as well as the Soresu and Shien that Master Unduli favors.
13.) Return: The traditional pilgrimage to Mirial (which is both colder and drier than the norm for most inhabitable planets/moons with Type I atmospheres and sentient populations, in ways that make the more customary sorts of Mirilian costumes, with their layers, long lengths, and head-coverings of one sort or another for essentially everyone, make all kinds of practical sense. Much of the land is either desert or tundra, with some taiga towards the far northern and the far southern tundra and some grasslands at the borders between the taiga and the deserts, much of it occasionally broken up by high plateaus and mostly extremely tall, jagged mountains. Though Mirial has technically been known to much of the greater galactic community and considered part of the Galactic Republic’s Outer Rim Territories for approximately four thousand years, when the Trade Federation “rediscovered” it some two hundred years ago, in one of the Great Reunification’s last pushes to supposedly “reconnect” with and discover more about the Outer Rim and Wild Space, its greedy representatives pillaged the entire system of much of its natural resources, often using crude, cheap strip mining techniques to get at precious ores and carelessly discarding slag and poisonous wastes without bothering to treat any of it, to the point where the planet is still recovering from all of the habitat destruction and environmental contamination. Truthfully, Barriss finds Mirial rather sad and, afterwards, is not entirely sure that she’s felt a real connection with either the planet or its people, even after all of her cultural studies and even though she truly does respect the traditional Mirial view of the Force and their widespread belief that each individual’s actions contribute not only to that specific person’s destiny, building on both past successes and failures to ultimately drive those beings towards their fates, but that such actions also ripple throughout the Force, affecting the destinies of not just the individuals directly involved but of whole peoples and, at least potentially, in some cases, even species all across the galaxy, which, to her, seems like a somewhat simplified version of the Jedi understanding of the Cosmic Force) goes well enough, but she’s both more tired and more glad than she’s expected to be, when they finally return to the Temple.
14.) Master: Luminara Unduli is, in many ways, a wonderful Jedi Master – she’s very grounded and steady, a formidable fighter who’s also a highly respected diplomat often called upon to act as an advisor to several high-profile system and planetary leaders and politicians, many of them in the Galactic Senate, meaning that she’s well-suited to understand the needs of an apprentice who’s drawn to what, to outsiders, might seem very opposing ways of being a Jedi – but she’s also downright tricky, sometimes (Barriss isn’t entirely sure she’s ever going to completely live down the fiasco of trying to force herself to master Floating Meditation in the space of a single afternoon, so she could rise high enough to accurately count the number of pastries in a bakery’s window across the way, when, at any time, she could’ve simply stood up on the balcony Master Unduli had brought her to in order to see them), often in ways that seem embarrassingly obvious after the fact and remind Barriss almost painfully of Master Yoda’s particular brand of teaching by trickery in order to fully and memorably drive a point home, and, though she’s increasingly sure that she wouldn’t ever want any other Master, sometimes Barriss can’t help but wish that her Master would spend just a little less time being cleverly oblique and a great deal more time just straight out telling her whatever lessons she’s trying to teach her, if only so she wouldn’t feel as if she’s wasting so much time failing to immediately grasp whatever moral or object lesson has been so cunningly hidden in or only hinted at sideways by whatever random task or strange, rambling story Master Unduli has decided to indulge in using to teach her by first tripping her up or otherwise tricking her.
15.) Hair: It takes multiple cups (and pots) of nice, calming teas and more than a few cups (and pots . . . and jugs) of tea bracing enough to (as Knight Suanne Tephee [“Suanne, please! Really, just Suanne is fine. You’ll make me feel old, otherwise, Barriss!”] would jokingly phrase it) put hair on one’s chest, but eventually, with some help from her not quite older sister in lineage (but not quite not, and so they all basically act as if she is, including Knight Suanne, on the rare times she’s in the Temple and not so exhausted or so injured, following a mission, that she’s stuck either in her rooms all the time or else in the Halls of Healing and so not up to visiting) and, shockingly enough, some really useful tips from Skywalker (who very nearly physically trips over her in the Room of a Thousand Fountains one day and ends up earnestly explaining that she’s focusing on the wrong bit of the exercise – the meditation part, not the floating, which, as Knight Kenobi has explained it to Skywalker, basically translates to a kind of very personalized field of antigravity – and that she should be thinking of it less as something mental or spiritual and more as something that can be physically done with the Force, closer to telekinesis than to actual meditation and strong enough, in an emergency, to help either save a Jedi who’s falling from a dangerous height or else to rescue someone else falling or about to fall from a potentially lethal height); much to her satisfaction, though, she does eventually manage to properly learn (if perhaps not to completely master, as she’s eventually capable of using it to keep herself from a bad end, after flinging herself – under Master Unduli’s watchful eyes, of course – multiple times out of various windows and off of several balconies in the Temple Council Towers, but isn’t entirely sure she’d be able to use it on someone else in a true emergency) Floating Meditation.
16.) Information: It’s next to impossible to truly keep secrets in the Jedi Temple – in terms of knowledge for training, information can be restricted to things like Jedi Holocrons, datachips, info crystals, and even old-fashioned books that are themselves regulated, so that only certain kinds of individuals can access them, but in terms of what happens in the Temple or what is spoken of in the Temple, well, it’s difficult to all but impossible to keep things a secret from individuals strong enough in the Force to not only regularly use it to help augment their senses and abilities but to be able to sense things (such as the thoughts and emotions of others) through their connection to the Force – which is why (even if impossible and improbable aren’t quite synonyms) it’s so weird that no one seems to really be talking much, afterwards, about the disastrous mission to Korriban, to apprehend dangerous criminals Jenna Zan Arbor and Granta Omega, even though four Masters and their Padawans were sent there but only the Masters and three of the Padawans returned alive . . . at least not until after Ferus Olin has been dismissed from the Order for intentionally manipulating the minds and wills of Jedi (from Masters all the way down to Initiates, apparently) and not only purposely causing a mechanical defect in the lightsaber of a fellow Padawan (Tru Veld, a fertile unfixed hermaphroditic metamorph Teevan – meaning that Tru can and often does phase from male to female and back again, basically at will – who’s apprenticed to Jedi Shadow Master Ouwain-Kli Ry-Gaul. Barriss isn’t much more than vaguely familiar with either one, since Jedi Shadows tend to keep to themselves and Veld’s nature has all but guaranteed that the Teevan would become a Shadow since the moment Veld first came to the Temple) that would directly lead to the death of another Padawan (the apprentice of Master Soara Antana, Darra Thel-Tanis, who apparently threw herself in the pathway of a deadly blaster shot, even though Tru almost certainly could have survived being struck by it, given the ridiculously rapid rate of regeneration Teevans are [in]famous for. Barriss is a little more familiar with Thel-Tanis, but can’t imagine why she’d ever do something so foolish, which makes her wonder, a little sickly, just how much influence Olin might have had over her, at the time), but attempting to conceal his actions by deliberately, maliciously shifting the blame for the lightsaber’s failure at the critical moment to yet another Padawan (Anakin Skywalker, whose Master evidently had to all but break down the doors of the Jedi High Council Chamber – and is rumored to have called on the Force in a way that somehow instantly shattered all of Ferus Olin’s manipulations – to save his apprentice from being wrongfully accused of negligence and being at cause for Darra Thel-Tanis’ death, which likely would’ve resulted in Skywalker being unjustly cast out of the Order), and then she’s left at least halfway wishing that the relative silence about the mission had never been broken, even though she knows, logically, that nothing good could have come of keeping Ferus Olin’s perfidy (which apparently even extended to his own Master, Siri Tachi, who’s such a wreck, afterwards, that the Council orders her on a five-month spiritual retreat, to recover) a secret.
17.) Help: It’s not exactly fair to feel wary of Skywalker, after the mess on Korriban and Ferus Olin’s banishment from the Order – Barriss knows that, even if it only serves to make her feel frustrated with herself for being overly cautious and even less inclined towards thinking all that kindly of (must less trusting) him – but she’s still not completely sure that having Skywalker on Ansion is going to be all that much help with the mission (even if it means that Obi-Wan Kenobi will also be with them) until after she’s been knocked off of her suubatar into Torosogt River, Skywalker’s immediately leapt into the water to try to save her, and they’ve both managed to survive their dunkings none the worse for wear (at which point she starts to think that it might actually be possible for them to become good friends, if only Skywalker will prove to be even halfway as willing to open up and speak honestly with her as he has been to fling himself – however wholly unnecessarily, if undeniably gallantly – headlong into danger on her behalf).
18.) Horror: Geonosis is . . . unspeakably terrible, so much needless death and suffering (and for what? For the pride and satisfaction of a former Jedi like Yannis Dooku, who deserted the Order after the murder of his former apprentice, Qui-Gon Jinn, during the Naboo Crisis? The traitor is essentially endorsing those responsible for the situation that allowed his former Padawan to be cornered and slaughtered by the Sith! If not for the greed of the Trade Federation, Master Jinn would [probably] still be alive, for pity’s sake!) that she’s quite certain that she’s going to have nightmares about it for the rest of her life . . . though the news, shortly afterwards, that the battle is only going to be the beginning and that the Republic is now officially at war with the self-declared Separatists is so awful that it very nearly eclipses even the horror of Geonosis.
19.) Fire: It’s not very Jedi-like of her, but after the third time that she essentially almost dies because of Geonosis and the second time that she’s only survived because of Ahsoka Tano’s ingenuity (and sheer stubborn refusal to ever give up) and just the absolute horror of one of those times involve parasitical brain worms that burrow into a host and essentially turn said host into a mindless zombie at the control of either the worms or the Geonosian Queen, Barriss believes that she should be forgiven for feeling as though they should just gather every ship they can get their hands on and have them all open fire on that entire blasted world from high orbit until there’s not a single living thing left alive on the entire accursed planet and it’s all reduced down to slag!
20.) Fortune: She honestly doesn’t expect to like Ahsoka Tano as much as she does – the young Togruta is almost painfully brash; she has no concept whatsoever of subtly; she’s so blasted busy rushing headlong into everything that she wouldn’t recognize the concept of strategic thinking if it became embodied and bypassed her two side lekku to deliberately bite her on her rear head-tail; and she quite clearly feels no loyalty whatsoever to her original Master, Togruta Jedi Master Yrannia Tey, since she’s thrilled when the idiots in the galactic press start calling her the Golden Child of the Golden Team (though, to be fair, as Barriss eventually finds out, there’s a very good reason for that. Xenophobia to the point where one believes that only a potential apprentice of the same species as one own self is not a good reason for taking on a Padawan, no matter what Master Tey might believe. Meanwhile, Master Kenobi and Knight Skywalker would literally give their lives for Ahsoka’s and she would do the same for either one of them in a heartbeat, so obviously she knows how to be faithful and she’s just as patently chosen the correct Jedi to give her devotion and allegiance to): on the other hand, she’s one of the most constant and reliable Jedi (if also easily one of the most stubborn, which is saying something, given she’s essentially been apprenticed by the Golden Team while her so-called “real” Master recovers from all of the damage she took at the First Battle of Geonosis. Master Unduli is right: those three Jedi truly do deserve one another, no matter what anyone else might seem to think on the subject, and they would all do anything and everything in their power to keep each other safe, just as they’d do all that they could to help a friend in need, as Barriss herself has had reason to learn, Ahsoka having saved her on more than one occasion that otherwise likely would’ve been hopeless) Barriss has ever had the good fortune to meet – but she trusts her to a degree that, rationally speaking, likely should be frightening, and faith, like friendship, is something that is not easily won, in these dark days of war, so Barriss fully intends to keep that trust and so remain worthy of their resultant friendship, however unexpected it might’ve initially been and however occasionally frustrating it might occasionally be.
21.) Fall: Umbara is such a complete horror show and Barriss is just so messed up from it (not only because of Jedi Master and General Pong Krell’s treachery and fall to the Dark Side, but because she can’t help but realize how much worse it could have so easily been, if Commander Rex had simply obeyed orders from Krell and hadn’t had the courage to contact Master Kenobi and, thus, discovered General Krell’s duplicity before he could deliberately pit unwitting clones from the 501st against clones of the 212th Attack Battalion. Krell still lost far too many men and slaughtered still more, when he was revealed as a traitor, but things came so appallingly close to being so much worse that Barriss feels sick whenever she thinks about it) that, afterwards, she barely even knows what she’s doing, much less what anyone else is saying or doing around her; that’s really no excuse for taking so long to realize that Letta Turmond (the wife of an Abyssin Temple worker and a self-professed pacifist who keeps trying to strike up a conversation with Barriss about why the Jedi aren’t doing more to end the war and how Barriss could be doing more to help stop the fighting) is a liar or just how conniving, hypocritical, and homicidal she actually is, though at least Barriss and Ahsoka manage to contain most of the explosions from the nano-droid bombs, even if they do kill both Turmond and her seemingly unwitting dupe of a husband and inflict enough damage on that specific Temple hangar both to injure a few dozen nearby Temple workers, clones, and even Jedi and to kill more than a handful of other innocent bystanders (though, thankfully, no Jedi die as a result of the only mostly thwarted bombing, or else Barriss honestly doesn’t know how she’d ever be able to live with herself, afterwards).
22.) Demand: It is not just and it is not right that the Jedi High Council should essentially punish Ahsoka for her efforts to help Barriss fix the mess that her distraction and failure to see what was directly in front of her nose so very nearly caused and, in some measure, did still cause, even with the both of them doing their utmost to try to either keep the explosions contained or else to channel them somewhere that they couldn’t cause any (measurable, irrevocable) harm – Yrannia Tey has no right to demand that Ahsoka be given back to her as if she were nothing more than a thing the Togruta felt she owned, as if she were a child throwing a tantrum because someone else has been playing with one of her toys while she’s been indisposed! Ahsoka may have said that she will go back to her old Master and Knight Skywalker and Master Kenobi may have allowed her to make that choice, but anyone who knows anything about any of the three Jedi involved in the decision must know that they have only done so because all of them are unwilling to be the cause for the High Council has a reason to issue the kind of formal censure and reprimand that would just end with all three of them being ordered apart from each other – and Barriss feels so betrayed by Yoda and the majority of the other High Council Masters (nine of whom have, like the Grand Master, backed Master Tey’s demand that her apprentice be returned to her) that, for a few moments, she almost wishes that she could just be selfish enough to simply turn her back and leave the Order that is so clearly failing three of the absolute best of its members behind.
23.) Bribe: Knighting Barriss so soon after Ahsoka has been ordered away from her true Masters and back to Yrannia Tey feels awfully like a bribe for not raising a fuss about such a perfidious act; Master Unduli insists that she deserves it (that what Barriss still has to learn of the Force can only be learned by taking on the duties and responsibilities of a Knight who might, one day, be both able and willing to take on an apprentice of her own), though, and, when Knight Skywalker and Master Kenobi (who know about it because Master Kenobi is a member of the High Council and apparently voted in favor of her being Knighted) take the time to comm and congratulate her on her Knighting, Anakin earnestly adds that, if she were able, Ahsoka would absolutely be the first in line to tell her that she deserves it, so, after most of a day and a night of quiet reflection, Barriss decides that she’ll allow herself to accept the honor, even though (in her heart of hearts) she’s still not entirely sure that she deserves it or that she even truly wants it, any longer.
24.) Chaos: Drongar somehow seems to evoke all the chaos and all the energy of the Living Force all concentrated into one bizarre planet of adaptogenic, mutagenic insanity and, if not for the bota fields (which both sides covet for its miraculous medical properties, though there are other forces at work – criminal cartels – who’d gladly steal the bota out from under them both if they could. No one has actually come out and said so, but she’s fairly certain that part of the reason why she’s been assigned here, to Republic Mobile Surgical Unit 7, is because someone in a position of power here is highly suspected to be working with one of those cartels and the High Council would prefer, if possible, to put an end to such nonsense without having to involve any military tribunals. Given what Tarkin almost managed to do to her and Ahsoka – which was only stopped because of the support that Master Kenobi and Knight Skywalker and, by extension, Ahsoka have in the Senate, not because of anything that the Council Masters did or said – she finds it almost painfully ironic that the Council has chosen to send her, rather than someone else, more likely to still feel strong bonds of trust and loyalty to the High Council), Barriss honestly isn’t sure that anyone would find the myriad (and often changing, usually for the worse) risks involved with trying to establish a military presence there at all worth it, particularly given the fact that almost everything else on Drongar except the bota seems designed to make trying to live on Drongar in any kind of safety as dangerous and close to impossible as is at all possible.
25.) Wrong: It is an injustice so great and so unequivocally wrong that a vicious, sadistic thug like Phow Ji should be reported as a hero, when he’s been caught on cam outright murdering Salissian mercenaries employed by the CIS who’ve already surrendered and has essentially deliberately suicided by Separatist drop ship and thermal grenade in order to escape the so-called dishonor of having to live with the knowledge that he not only owes his life to a Jedi Healer like Barriss, but that he owes his life to her specifically because she’s used the Force – which he’s always loudly claimed does not exist – in order to heal him, that she’s not at all surprised that Den Dhur (the Sullustan reporter who’d written an exposé about the Bundukian mercenary and Teräs Käsi champions murderous ways) ultimately refused to have his name on the story at all, after his editor essentially changed everything in it, with the excuse that the Republic needs more stories about heroes during such turbulent times (and not, apparently, hard-hitting exposés about war crimes being perpetrated by mercenaries on the Republic’s payroll).
26.) Amateur: Healer and specialist surgeon Kornell Divini of Tatooine – Uli Divini, as he smilingly insists on being called – is both younger than Barriss has expected (she knows that Jos Vondar, the Chief Medical Officer and another Healer who’s specialized in surgeries of all sorts on multiple kinds of sentient beings, likes to complain that Healer Divini looks as if he’s about fourteen, but that’s clearly an exaggeration – or even a complaint – and not to be taken seriously. She’s been expecting someone in his early- or even mid-twenties, given the sort of education and training he must’ve had, to be stationed on a Rimsoo, but “Uli” looks like he’s very close to her own age, meaning he’s almost certainly not even twenty standard years of age yet. He reminds her of Anakin Skywalker, in a way, and not just because of his accent or his fair hair and blue eyes, though his skills as a surgeon, however phenomenal, can’t quite compare with Skywalker’s prodigious strength in the Force), and kinder than she quite knows what to do with, particularly when he somehow charms her into letting him see to an injury she’s accidentally inflicted on her right foot that she could have dealt with entirely by herself, with the Force, explains that he’s out in the swamps of Drongar in the first place (after she challenges him about being in the swamp) because his mother (renowned mudopterist Elana Divini, as Barriss eventually realizes) collects Alderaanian flare-wings and he’s interested in seeing what sort of comparable insects might call Drongar’s jungles home, smiles in a way that makes her realize that, once he’s old enough to have laugh lines, he’s going to be stunningly handsome (though why such a thing should ever even occur to her – why she should be looking at the young man closely enough to ever realize something like that – completely escapes her ability to understand), and leaves her so unbalanced that she feels even more like a rank amateur pretending to be something/someone she’s not than she had when, only moments before, she’d somehow managed to let herself be startled enough by an unexpected, brief but strong shift in temperature to lose control in the midst of a routine kata to the point of hurting herself with her own lightsaber (even though she hasn’t fumbled her lightsaber badly enough to injure herself since she’d been nine, and then it had only been a small nick to her left wrist, far less serious than the puncturing gash she’d inflicted on her poor foot).
27.) Precious: Bota is known to act as a potent broad-based antibiotic on humans and to have similar effects on several kinds of near-humans, as well, and the clones, being based on the genetic profile of Jango Fett (a registered genetic [if borderline] human norm Mandalorian originally from Concord Dawn, according to the Bounty Hunters’ Guild, which keeps track of such things), qualify as human norms (for the most part, anyway, though the few truly obvious aberrations tend to number among those the Kaminoan cloners categorize as genetic deviants only worth decommissioning, so they often end up – occasionally after being literally rescued by Master Shaak Ti or another Jedi stationed on Kamino if Master Ti cannot be there, even though Knight Kenobi demanded that all such decommissionings stop when he “accepted” the clones from the Kaminoans and every Jedi on Kamino since then who’s been there long enough to speak to any of the Kaminoans about the progress of the clones still in training has reiterated this order – in support positions in the Temple, rather than in the fighting forces of the GAR), which is almost certainly why Zabrak Healer and specialist surgeon Zan Yant had gone to the trouble (prior to his tragic death, during a Separatist attack on the Rimsoo) to seek out patches of bota growing wild and to (illegally) process it (bota being so prized that all of it is supposed to be shipped offworld, for sale, the harvested and stabilized/processed bota being considered too valuable to “waste” on mere soldiers) and put the results in muscle-poppers in the first place, which is why (after Jos Vondar admits what he’s found, when gathering up and clearing out his friend’s belongings from their shared quarters, and they take the risk of trying it – to miraculous effect – on a dying clone soldier) Barriss thinks of attempting to use one of the precious few bota poppers on a Rodian lieutenant with chronic smashbone fever, in hopes it will help (she’s already decided that, if Healer Yant could be brave enough to find and illegally process wild bota, so he would have some on hand to use on the worst cases in the medical wards, then she can and must do the same. Bota grows wild in many places in and around the swamps and jungles. There will be more poppers, if this one is ineffective. It won’t be a waste to try it, and it could very well help with a disease that, as yet, has no cure), and why, when caught by surprise by a particularly strong muscle spasm, she ends up accidentally injecting herself with some of the bota.
28.) Unique: Bota, like basically all known lifeforms native specifically to Drongar, is naturally both adaptogenic and mutagenic and always has been, at least to some extent – though it’s not (yet) been proven so, logically speaking, it’s adaptogenic properties likely have a great deal to do with the fact that bota has different kinds of effects on and medical uses for so many different species and no known negative side effects to any of those species, even though they use it for such wildly different reasons (from narcotic painkillers to powerful stimulants to broad-based antibiotics) – so it probably shouldn’t be so surprising that the plants (which technically aren’t exactly plants, being instead a unique type of lifeform somewhere between a mold and a fungus. Since no one has yet bothered to try to formally classify what bota exactly is, yet – it being more important to protect it and harvest it so that it can be dispensed or tested further on new/different species – most beings refer to bota as a plant, anyway, for simplicity’s sake) are mutating (and apparently have been for some time, though someone with deep pockets – most likely hoping to profit from the information somehow – has apparently been going to great lengths to try to keep this fact from getting out) towards the likelihood that bota might, one day all too soon, become, for all extents and purposes, inert and therefore useless (and worthless) as any sort of drug; given the reactions Barriss has had both to her unintended injection and the injection she’s deliberately given herself, to see if it would replicate the effects of her accidental dose, though, the fact that they could lose bota before ever discovering what it could mean, to Forceful individuals like the Jedi, it means that she has to contact the Council of Reassignment and, thus, the Circle of Jedi Healers and the MedCorps, as well as the High Council, at once, so that the Masters will know what bota can do to strengthen/deepen one’s connection with the Force in time to try to do something to save it.
29.) Communiqué: She is, in all honesty, shocked to see Master Kenobi (he isn’t a Healer, after all, though he is known for being an excellent emergency battlefield medic and it is, thanks to the war, increasingly becoming obvious that he’s among one of a handful of the most powerful Jedi currently in the entire Order. He explains, only a little sardonically, that he has contacts with the AgriCorps and, since the hope is that a fixed or stabilized version of the most potent remaining extant strain of bota [which, hopefully, will be unlikely to ever mutate to an ineffective form] can be successfully transplanted to at least a few suitable planets/moons known only to members of the High Council and a few high-ranking [and/or sworn to secrecy members] of the ExplorCorps and then raised and harvested by highly gifted and thoroughly vetted AgriCorps members for processing by the MedCorps and use by them and Jedi Healers, he’s here at the request of both the Council of Reassignment and the rest of the High Council), among the various Jedi Healers and Jedi Service Corps members who’ve stealthily responded to her communiqué (she’s even more astonished to see him without Knight Skywalker at his side, though the explanation that a majority of the High Council has decided that his friendship with Chancellor Palpatine – who, after all, is responsible for the policy that forbids the Healers on Drongar from using bota on their patients – makes him too much of a security risk to know about what they’re trying to do here); ultimately, though, Barriss ends up being extremely glad that he’s come, as she’s almost certain that they wouldn’t have succeeded in their aims without Master Kenobi’s raw strength in the Force and his startling ability to persuade the bota to grow in a way that should make it much hardier (and, thus, more likely to survive being transplanted) and perhaps even more potent, in the long run, since its nature should now be prone to adapt only to make it harder to kill and not to keep wildly mutating until it share so few similarities with what it is now that it will no longer be effective as a drug.
30.) Traitor: To keep their actions (which are illegal according to the Chancellor’s policies and Republic law, though she would argue that it is the laws that are immoral, not the actions of the Jedi, especially not once she learns that the hope is that the transplanted bota will thrive so much that the MedCorps will be able to experiment a little and perhaps come up with a bacta-bota mix that can surreptitiously be added to every Jedi’s standard field pack and be regularly provided in bulk to clone medics and other such doctors and healers in the field, with the explanation that it’s an experimental Force-enhanced strain of extremely effective bacta, for emergency use. Bacta technically is also legally restricted – Chancellor Palpatine has, over the course of the war, quite foolishly limited its production even further than it used to be, instead of expanding it so that the GAR will be guaranteed more than enough supply, supposedly to make it harder for Separatists to get their hands on any of it – but it’s always been something of an open secret [among Jedi, in any case. It’s not their fault if the politicians and the corporations have forgotten!] that, because of their Service Corps, the Jedi can and do produce their own bacta, and frankly Barriss regards the decision to secretly try to save and transplant an effective strain bota as an extension of the same policy that’s seen the AgriCorps and the MedCorps producing bacta for Jedi use for the past four thousand years or so), a secret, she must act as if she’s dismayed when the secret comes out, about the bota mutating to uselessness and the order comes that the Republic is abandoning Drongar; she doesn’t expect another traitor (Eqani Minder Klo Merit, of all beings! The loss of his homeworld has evidently driven him mad – after all, the Jedi have no records of a Republic weapons test, such as he claimed destroyed Eqanus, and they would surely know, if it were true – as well as driving him to betray the Republic to the CIS) to be exposed and shot by Jos Vondar in the chaos of the Separatist attack that very nearly derails the Republic retreat, though!
31.) Two: Barriss knows that the High Council have been assigning both orphaned Padawans and Padawans whose individual Masters have been injured to the point where they can no longer adequately do their duty by their apprentices and continue see to their training to other available Knights and Masters without waiting to see if anyone will volunteer for such a responsibility or even bothering to ask, first, if anyone has a particular preference – she’s friends with Ahsoka Tano, so she cannot help but know how Master Yoda persuaded (most) of the rest of the High Council to assign Ahsoka to Knight Skywalker and Master Kenobi – but she’s barely been a Jedi Knight for two standard months, so the absolute last thing she’s expecting, when she returns to the Temple after Drongar, is to be summoned to the High Council Chamber and informed that she’s doing such an excellent job that the Council Masters are assigning her Selonian Padawan Zonder – whose Master, Armann Asantuen, one of the two dozen Corellian or Green Jedi who decided to fight with the Republic, even after Senator Garm Bel Iblis invoked Contemplanys Hermi and the entire sector technically closed its borders, back when the war was just beginning, is currently missing in action – until either Zonder’s Master can be found or else definitive proof the man’s demise is discovered.
32.) Awkward: She and Zonder are doing their utmost to try to make the best they can out of a truly awkward situation (though neither one of them is really all that comfortable with the High Council assigning them to one another. Zonder insists that his bond with his Master is unbroken, meaning the man is alive [a fact that she likely finds entirely too reassuring, given the likelihood that the High Council will just assign someone else to her if Zonder’s Master turns up and is able to take Zonder back on again], and that he should be out there looking for him, which Barriss can understand, even if she doesn’t quite agree with him. There are Jedi Shadows who are looking for Master Asantuen, after all, and Shadows are far more suited for such work than any Padawan could hope to be) and she’s tentatively beginning to think that they might be starting to find a rhythm together that works when the Separatists suddenly invade Coruscant, General Grievous kidnaps Supreme Chancellor Palpatine, and things proceed to pretty much try to go to the lowest levels of Sith hells in a bloody handbasket.
33.) Attack: They were supposed to be dispatched to Felucia, but the unexpected invasion of Coruscant and all of the chaos surrounding that derailed those orders long enough for Master Kenobi and Knight Skywalker both to discover that Palpatine, the Supreme Chancellor of the Galactic Republic, is actually the mysterious second Sith Lord (Sidious, according to what little they’ve been able to uncover, since the Naboo Crisis) and has quite deliberately been playing both sides of the war all along and to then confront and defeat (and, in the process, dispatch) him, after which there was the attempted attack on the Temple to deal with (because, apparently, the clones all had biochip implants in their brains that could be triggered to force them to follow certain commands and the cowardly, traitorous Sith attempted to trigger Order 66 – labelling all Jedi traitors to the Republic and calling for their immediate execution – when confronted by Kenobi and Skywalker), and then, well . . . the war may essentially be over with, but Barriss is a Healer, so she’s going to be needed to help deal with both the problem of those Sith accursed biochips and the fact that the Kaminoans so cruelly designed the clones to age at twice the speed of average human norms, so no one can possibly ever highjack the free will of any of the clones ever again and the clones can hopefully still have long and productive lives as free citizens of whatever it is that the Republic is reorganizing itself to become, now that the Sith have been exposed and dealt with and their plans have also been exposed and ruined.
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mayxthexforce · 10 months ago
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𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 . ( nsfw edition. )
PART 2 - MUSES E TO I
Part 1 (A to D) - Part 3 (K to M) - Part 4 (N to S) - Part 5 (T to V).
RULES: bold which option your prefer (or, in some cases, maybe just hates the least!) out of each of the following pairs
DISCLAIMER: THESE ONLY APPLY TO ADULT VERSES! DON'T BE WEIRD! DISCLAIMER 2: bold means it applies to the muse, crossed means it doesn't apply at all/muse has no preference.
★ Elodore Vane
submissive or dominant? Switch
whips or chains?
handcuffs or shibari?
pillow princess or power bottom?
voyeur or exhibitionist?
blindfolds or spreader bars?
butt plugs or vibrators?
edging or multiple rounds?
knots or ovipositor?
spanking or scratching?
ball gag or muzzle?
strap on or double sided dildo?
one on one or group sex?
vanilla or kinky?
lengthy cocks or girthy cocks?
small boobs or large boobs?
ass or chests?
thighs or arms?
hot wax or knifeplay?
loud or quiet? Breathy
biting or sucking?
collars or piercings?
costumes or lingerie?
laughing & silliness during sex or intensity & power struggle during sex?
fucking a virgin or fucking someone with experience?
face to face or from behind?
phone sex or sexting?
cumming inside or cumming outside?
being filled or bukkake?
dirty talk or degradation?
role play or porn on in the background?
public edging or filming in the bedroom?
condom or bareback?
lube or raw?
video call masturbation or sexy selfies?
blood play or breath play?
face fucking or anal sex? Face sitting
leather or PVC?
morning sex or evening sex?
★ Feemor
clothes on or clothes off?
submissive or dominant?
whips or chains?
handcuffs or shibari?
pillow princess or power bottom?
voyeur or exhibitionist?
blindfolds or spreader bars?
butt plugs or vibrators?
edging or multiple rounds?
knots or ovipositor?
spanking or scratching?
ball gag or muzzle?
strap on or double sided dildo?
one on one or group sex?
vanilla or kinky?
lengthy cocks or girthy cocks?
small boobs or large boobs?
ass or chests?
thighs or arms?
hot wax or knifeplay?
loud or quiet?
biting or sucking?
collars or piercings?
costumes or lingerie?
laughing & silliness during sex or and intensity & power struggle during sex?
fucking a virgin or fucking someone with experience? No preference
face to face or from behind?
phone sex or sexting?
cumming inside or cumming outside?
being filled or bukkake?
dirty talk or degradation?
role play or porn on in the background?
public edging or filming in the bedroom?
condom or bareback?
lube or raw?
video call masturbation or sexy selfies?
blood play or breath play?
face fucking or and anal sex?
leather or PVC?
morning sex or evening sex?
★ Feral Opress
clothes on or clothes off?
submissive or dominant? Submissive leaning Switch
whips or chains?
handcuffs or shibari?
pillow princess or power bottom?
voyeur or exhibitionist?
blindfolds or spreader bars?
butt plugs or vibrators?
edging or multiple rounds?
knots or ovipositor?
spanking or scratching?
ball gag or muzzle?
strap on or double sided dildo?
one on one or group sex?
vanilla or kinky?
lengthy cocks or girthy cocks?
small boobs or large boobs?
ass or chests?
thighs or arms?
hot wax or knifeplay?
loud or quiet?
biting or sucking?
collars or piercings?
costumes or lingerie?
laughing & silliness during sex or intensity & power struggle during sex?
fucking a virgin or fucking someone with experience? No preference
face to face or from behind?
phone sex or sexting?
cumming inside or cumming outside?
being filled or bukkake?
dirty talk or degradation?
role play or porn on in the background?
public edging or filming in the bedroom?
condom or bareback?
lube or raw?
video call masturbation or sexy selfies?
blood play or breath play?
face fucking or and anal sex?
leather or PVC?
morning sex or evening sex?
★ Ferus Olin
clothes on or clothes off?
submissive or dominant? Dominant leaning switch
whips or chains?
handcuffs or shibari?
pillow princess or power bottom?
voyeur or exhibitionist?
blindfolds or spreader bars?
butt plugs or vibrators?
edging or multiple rounds?
knots or ovipositor?
spanking or scratching?
ball gag or muzzle?
strap on or double sided dildo?
one on one or group sex? He's got two boyfriends
vanilla or kinky?
lengthy cocks or girthy cocks?
small boobs or large boobs?
ass or chests?
thighs or arms?
hot wax or knifeplay?
loud or quiet?
biting or sucking?
collars or piercings?
costumes or lingerie?
laughing & silliness during sex or intensity & power struggle during sex?
fucking a virgin or fucking someone with experience?
face to face or from behind?
phone sex or sexting?
cumming inside or cumming outside?
being filled or bukkake?
dirty talk or degradation?
role play or porn on in the background?
public edging or filming in the bedroom?
condom or bareback?
lube or raw?
video call masturbation or sexy selfies?
blood play or breath play?
face fucking or anal sex?
leather or PVC?
morning sex or evening sex?
★ Galen Marek
clothes on or clothes off?
submissive or dominant? Switch
whips or chains?
handcuffs or shibari?
pillow princess or power bottom?
voyeur or exhibitionist?
blindfolds or spreader bars?
butt plugs or vibrators?
edging or and multiple rounds?
knots or ovipositor?
spanking or scratching?
ball gag or muzzle?
strap on or double sided dildo?
one on one or group sex?
vanilla or kinky?
lengthy cocks or girthy cocks?
small boobs or large boobs?
ass or chests?
thighs or arms?
hot wax or knifeplay?
loud or quiet?
biting or sucking?
collars or piercings?
costumes or lingerie?
laughing & silliness during sex or intensity & power struggle during sex?
fucking a virgin or fucking someone with experience?
face to face or from behind? No preference
phone sex or sexting?
cumming inside or cumming outside?
being filled or bukkake?
dirty talk or degradation?
role play or porn on in the background?
public edging or filming in the bedroom?
condom or bareback?
lube or raw?
video call masturbation or sexy selfies?
blood play or breath play?
face fucking or anal sex?
leather or PVC?
morning sex or evening sex?
★ Garen Muln
clothes on or clothes off?
submissive or dominant? Switch
whips or chains?
handcuffs or shibari?
pillow princess or power bottom?
voyeur or exhibitionist?
blindfolds or spreader bars?
butt plugs or vibrators?
edging or and multiple rounds?
knots or ovipositor?
spanking or scratching?
ball gag or muzzle?
strap on or double sided dildo?
one on one or group sex?
vanilla or kinky?
lengthy cocks or girthy cocks?
small boobs or large boobs?
ass or chests?
thighs or arms?
hot wax or knifeplay?
loud or quiet?
biting or sucking?
collars or piercings?
costumes or lingerie?
laughing & silliness during sex or intensity & power struggle during sex?
fucking a virgin or fucking someone with experience? No preference
face to face or from behind?
phone sex or sexting?
cumming inside or cumming outside?
being filled or bukkake?
dirty talk or degradation?
role play or porn on in the background?
public edging or filming in the bedroom?
condom or bareback?
lube or raw?
video call masturbation or sexy selfies?
blood play or breath play?
face fucking or anal sex?
leather or PVC?
morning sex or evening sex?
★ Goran Beviin
clothes on or clothes off?
submissive or dominant? Submission leaning switch
whips or chains?
handcuffs or shibari?
pillow princess or power bottom? No preference
voyeur or exhibitionist?
blindfolds or spreader bars?
butt plugs or vibrators?
edging or and multiple rounds?
knots or ovipositor?
spanking or scratching?
ball gag or muzzle?
strap on or double sided dildo?
one on one or group sex? He's got more than one partner in most of my ships
vanilla or kinky?
lengthy cocks or and girthy cocks?
small boobs or and large boobs?
ass or chests?
thighs or arms?
hot wax or knifeplay?
loud or quiet?
biting or sucking?
collars or piercings?
costumes or lingerie?
laughing & silliness during sex or intensity & power struggle during sex?
fucking a virgin or fucking someone with experience?
face to face or from behind?
phone sex or sexting?
cumming inside or cumming outside?
being filled or bukkake?
dirty talk or degradation?
role play or porn on in the background?
public edging or filming in the bedroom?
condom or bareback?
lube or raw?
video call masturbation or sexy selfies?
blood play or breath play?
face fucking or anal sex?
leather or PVC?
morning sex or evening sex?
★ Han Solo
clothes on or clothes off?
submissive or dominant? Bratty switch
whips or chains?
handcuffs or shibari?
pillow princess or power bottom?
voyeur or exhibitionist?
blindfolds or spreader bars?
butt plugs or vibrators?
edging or and multiple rounds?
knots or ovipositor?
spanking or scratching?
ball gag or muzzle?
strap on or double sided dildo?
one on one or group sex?
vanilla or kinky? No preference
Lengthy cocks or girthy cocks? No preference
small boobs or and large boobs?
ass or chests?
thighs or arms?
hot wax or knifeplay?
loud or quiet?
biting or sucking?
collars or piercings?
costumes or lingerie?
laughing & silliness during sex or and intensity & power struggle during sex? No preference
fucking a virgin or fucking someone with experience?
face to face or from behind?
phone sex or sexting?
cumming inside or cumming outside?
being filled or bukkake?
dirty talk or degradation?
role play or porn on in the background?
public edging or filming in the bedroom?
condom or bareback?
lube or raw?
video call masturbation or sexy selfies?
blood play or breath play?
face fucking or and anal sex?
leather or PVC?
morning sex or evening sex?
★ Irek Ismaren
clothes on or clothes off?
submissive or dominant? Bratty switch
whips or chains?
handcuffs or shibari?
pillow princess or power bottom?
voyeur or exhibitionist?
blindfolds or spreader bars?
butt plugs or vibrators?
edging or multiple rounds?
knots or ovipositor?
spanking or scratching?
ball gag or muzzle?
strap on or double sided dildo?
one on one or group sex?
vanilla or kinky?
lengthy cocks or and girthy cocks?
small boobs or large boobs?
ass or chests?
thighs or arms?
hot wax or knifeplay?
loud or quiet?
biting or sucking?
collars or piercings?
costumes or lingerie?
laughing & silliness during sex or and intensity & power struggle during sex?
fucking a virgin or fucking someone with experience?
face to face or from behind?
phone sex or sexting?
cumming inside or cumming outside?
being filled or bukkake?
dirty talk or degradation?
role play or porn on in the background?
public edging or filming in the bedroom?
condom or bareback?
lube or raw?
video call masturbation or sexy selfies?
blood play or breath play?
face fucking or anal sex?
leather or PVC?
morning sex or evening sex?
clothes on or clothes off?
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mayxthexforce · 10 months ago
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@mutatiio
“What’s meant to be will always find a way”
— Trisha Yearwood (via suspend)
22K notes · View notes
brcha · 2 years ago
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tagdrop
v: princess of alderaan ( please picture me in the trees ) v: before the wars ( now come the days of queen breha; may they be blessed ) v: the clone wars ( i will not change our traditions for a repellent regime ) v: an imperial galaxy ( we can outlast the empire ) v: imperial occupation ( i was a queen and you took away my crown ) v: surviving alderaan ( is a queen still a queen with no planet and no people )
: bail organa ( i take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover ) : leia organa ( she will be loved with us ) : winter retrac ( little golden moon and stars ) : fess ilee ( if anything ever happens to me and you’re in trouble go to fess ) : ferus olin ( only twenty minutes to sleep but you dream of some epiphany ) : deara antilles ( when the words of a sister come back in whispers ) : padmé amidala ( i wish more than anything that you could see her grow ) : alderaan ( alderaan is peaceful; we have no weapons ) : visage ( gleaming twinkling eyes like sinking ships on waters ) : canon quotes ( the stuff of legends )
: aesthetics & wardrobe ( with beauty or the appreciation of beauty) : art ( some people are so talented ) : my edits ( liesl makes things ) : musings ( take me to the lakes where all the poets went to die ) : headcanons ( my mind turns your life into folklore ) : wishlist ( first star i see tonight ) : imagery ( slow motion double vision in rose blush )
r: family ( loving someone deeply gives you courage ) r: breha organa & leia organa ( my daughter is a miracle who never ceases to be miraculous ) r: breha organa & bail organa ( life was a willow and it bent right to your wind )
#v: princess of alderaan ( please picture me in the trees )#v: before the wars ( now come the days of queen breha; may they be blessed )#v: the clone wars ( i will not change our traditions for a repellent regime )#v: an imperial galaxy ( we can outlast the empire )#v: imperial occupation ( i was a queen and you took away my crown )#v: surviving alderaan ( is a queen still a queen with no planet and no people )#: bail organa ( i take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover )#: leia organa ( she will be loved with us )#: winter retrac ( little golden moon and stars )#: deara antilles ( when the words of a sister come back in whispers )#: fess ilee ( if anything ever happens to me and you’re in trouble go to fess )#: ferus olin ( only twenty minutes to sleep but you dream of some epiphany )#: padmé amidala ( i wish more than anything that you could see her grow )#: alderaan ( alderaan is peaceful; we have no weapons )#: visage ( gleaming twinkling eyes like sinking ships on waters )#: canon quotes ( the stuff of legends )#: aesthetics & wardrobe ( with beauty or the appreciation of beauty)#: art ( some people are so talented )#: musings ( take me to the lakes where all the poets went to die )#: headcanons ( my mind turns your life into folklore )#r: family ( loving someone deeply gives you courage )#r: breha organa & bail organa ( life was a willow and it bent right to your wind )#: imagery ( slow motion double vision in rose blush )#: wishlist ( first star i see tonight )#tagdrop#r: breha organa & leia organa ( my daughter is a miracle who never ceases to be miraculous )#: my edits ( liesl makes things )
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aurumpulvis-moved · 7 years ago
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Ahsoka: My master Anakin is wise -
Ferus:
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tunglo · 2 years ago
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Jedi Quest #3: The Dangerous Games - Jude Watson
Quotes:
By now Obi-Wan and Anakin had snaked through the crowd and were standing by, close enough to spring forward if needed. With a look, Obi-Wan told Anakin to hang back.
 Ferus Olin stepped forward. "Think twice, my friend," he said in a soft tone. "Then think again."
 Anakin saw the admiration on his Master's face at the coolness of Ferus's approach. A flare of jealousy rose inside him. Ferus always knew the right thing to say and the right way to say it. Ferus was only two years older than Anakin, but he was known for his maturity.
...
He nodded a greeting at Ferus, who nodded stiffly back. There was no need to pretend that they liked each other. Ferus had warned him once that he did not trust him and would keep an eye on him. This had infuriated Anakin, and he still wasn't over it. He had let his anger go, but his resentment still simmered. He knew how a Jedi was supposed to handle that, but he couldn't.
 He could not speak to Obi-Wan about it, either. He didn't want his Master to know that a fellow Padawan, especially one as gifted and respected as Ferus, did not trust him.
--
Does he really think he's fooling me?
Obi-Wan's exasperation with his Padawan did not show on his face. Anakin's attempts to hide his excitement may have tricked the others, but Obi-Wan felt it charge the air. He had never seen Anakin compete in a Podrace, and Qui-Gon had not given him many details, but he knew how outrageously dangerous Podracing was. Pilots sat in open cockpits, racing fragile crafts that were powered by massive engines tethered to the racer by flexible cables. Obi-Wan could imagine that the prospect of Anakin once again pitting his skills and reflexes and daring in such a race would be irresistible.
 But it would not be worthy of a Jedi. Jedi did not seek thrills.
 Obi-Wan could understand a momentary tug toward the past. He would expect his Padawan to overcome it. A longing for such things was childish, in his opinion. As soon as they were alone, he would speak to Anakin about it....
--
But Anakin had no desire to argue with Ferus again. He didn't care about him enough to argue. He had more important things to do - like check out the Podracers. ...
He took off toward the hills to his left. Well, if this mission was supposed to teach him about the Living Force, he doubted there was much to learn. Sometimes he thought he was in better touch with the Living Force than his Master. Obi-Wan lived in his head. His emotions were reserved.
Anakin often had no idea what his Master felt or thought. Sometimes he seemed to respond to the beings they met on their travels simply as ways to get something accomplished. A scrappy pilot with hair-raising stories of smuggling tech parts through the Outer Rim systems was just a means to get from the Manda spaceport to Circarpous Major. A tavern owner who kept pet dinkos was a contact to discover the location of a possible weapons cache. A young brother and sister bounty-hunting team was taken along just to provide an answer to the mystery of who was behind a Jedi's kidnapping.
It wasn't that Obi-Wan lacked compassion, Anakin mused. It was just  that there was a little more distance between him and other living beings. Qui-Gon had not been able to pass along his connection to the Living Force to his Padawan, Anakin felt.
 Anakin treasured his Master. But sometimes he wondered what it would have been like to have Qui-Gon as a Master instead. Would Qui-Gon have shared his feelings more easily? Anakin had felt a connection to Qui-Gon from the start. It had taken more time with Obi-Wan. It was still taking time.
--
"There was nothing I could do." Anakin's face was pale. He had seen death before, but he was still affected by it. Obi-Wan was glad to see this. He hoped Anakin would never lose that particular vulnerability. 
There had been a time when he had wondered if Anakin failed to connect, a time when he had seen a curious blankness on the boy's face after he had killed in battle. Since that time, Obi-Wan had watched Anakin carefully. When he saw his Padawan feel the enormity of a life lost, he was reassured.
--
"And is that your mission on Euceron, to free Djulla?" Obi-Wan asked sternly.
 "No," Anakin said. "But was it Qui-Gon's mission to free me? Must we follow a mission so exactly that we turn our backs on beings who need help? Every mission has a detour. You've told me that."
 "I've also told you that it is the mark of a Jedi to recognize whether or not to follow the detour," Obi-Wan reminded him.
 "Then I ask you to let me make this choice," Anakin replied.
 His Padawan's voice was firm. There was no pleading, no uncertainty. He wanted what he wanted. Was that the right thing in this circumstance? Obi-Wan pondered the problem.
--
Suddenly, his smile dimmed. He spied Ferus and Tru threading their way toward him through a sea of pit droids and mechanics and pilots, the usual frenzy of a pit hangar before a race.
 My Master sent them. He doesn't trust me. The thought seared Anakin's mind before rationality set in. It would be helpful to have backup, he told himself, trying to be logical. There was nothing wrong with that. He dodged a lubricant hose and went forward to meet them.
 Tru's head swiveled, taking in the excitement. "Strange, if you think about it," he said to Anakin. Anakin wiped his hands on a rag. "What?" "That Podraces are so dangerous, but nobody looks scared," he said.
 "There are beings who equate danger with pleasure," Ferus said, hiseyes dark with disapproval. "It is a mistake easily made for those who donot think deeply." He gave Anakin a cool look.
 "Well, there's such a thing as fun, Ferus," Tru said amiably. "Even you have to admit that."
 "Yes," Ferus said. "But not here." His cool gaze did not falter as he studied Anakin. "I'm not clear on why you are racing, Anakin."
 "It is the best way to discover how the race is fixed," Anakin said.
--
Anakin took a step toward him but again his Master stopped him.
 "He is my enemy," Anakin said.
 "You are a Jedi," Obi-Wan told him. His voice was low and pitched only for Anakin. "You are a Jedi," he repeated.
 The mist in Anakin's head cleared. He took a breath and looked around.
 Ferus Olin was watching him, as he always was, his dark eyes gleaming with secret knowledge, as if he had glimpsed the red mist that was Anakin's rage. Tru nodded at him, his expression showing only loyalty and affection. Ry-Gaul appeared to be guarding Liviani Sarno.
 Nothing was as he thought it would be. He felt his legs trembling. He had almost lost control in front of his fellow Padawans and two Jedi Masters. He had come so close.
 Obi-Wan's voice was gentle. "Come, Padawan. There is a mission to complete."
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mayxthexforce · 1 year ago
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@corruptedforce
@mutatiio
“You are at once both the quiet and the confusion of my heart.”
— Franz Kafka (via quotemadness)
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tachiisms · 4 years ago
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SHIPPING INFO !! ANSWER THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR MUSE SO PEOPLE KNOW HOW SHIPPING WORKS ON YOUR BLOG.
WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER?: canonically Siri x Obi-Wan is a good otp, but the best otp is Siri x getting to see Ferus as the leader of the Eleven
WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO WRITE WHEN IT COMES TO SHIPPING?: I’m willing to write every aspect of a ship -- the good, the bad, the fluff, the angst, the happy endings, the struggles to make it work... even the ships where it didn’t work romantically and the relationship ended and/or changed. My set in stone limit though is that I will not write, or engage with, Master/Padawan ships. 
HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?: for Siri specifically, age gap isn’t as big a deal for me as power dynamic gap, so long as both parties are consenting adults, of course. That does tend to keep ships with her somewhat close in age, but not always. (for example, Siri tends to be uncomfortable shipping with clones, because there is a very clear and distinctive power dynamic between her as a General, and clones as lower ranking soldiers.) 
ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?: hmm... yes and no? I tend to see myself as more ‘hesitant’ than ‘selective.’ Partially because Siri does have a canon ship, and I always try to be really careful to not make Obi-Wan rpers ever think that I require or would force shipping on them (nor do I want to feel like I’m obligated to ship with all of them) so I can be hesitant to bring up shipping. And just kind of generally I can be hesitant to bring up shipping because of an irrational worry about coming off as pushy. It also does have to factor in that Siri particularly can be kind of difficult to ship, because of her personality as much as because she’s a Jedi.
HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY ARE CONSIDERED NSFW?: I usually start tagging as nsfw once the clothes come off beyond what you can see on most network television shows or a pg-13 movie scene. And I exercise personal preference if I need to start tagging as nsfw sooner. 
WHO ARE OTHER THE CHARACTERS YOU SHIP YOUR CHARACTER WITH?: currently? I don’t have many active ships with Siri. (I did say she’s difficult to ship!) I do currently ship her with Obi-Wan. I also ship her with @skymma‘s John Constantine, which is a super fun ship dynamic. I also ship her with @interphrase‘s Dan Torrance, which is more of a friends-with-benefits ship but still gets a shout out. And...is that it?? Am I forgetting anyone?
DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?: you don’t have to ask as you do just kind of communicate with me that you want to ship? (Otherwise I may not pick up on it and that’s no fun for anyone.)
ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?: meh? It depends. When I have a ship, I’m ship obsessed and I really enjoy exploring that dynamic. But when I don’t have a ship that doesn’t bother me either, so I guess I’m sort of both but more ship more-or-less? Here’s the deal: romantic ships are fun, but only one very small percentage of a person’s relationships in life. I am way more friendship and found-family-ship obsessed, honestly. 
ARE YOU MULTISHIP?: always.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?: uh, the space husbands. Full stop. Olin/Lands? Favorite ship. Listen, even Palpatine shipped it. Basically the entire galaxy shipped it. Close second is Bail and Breha Organa though, they are the most adorable space parents. Bonus points that you know Ferus and Roan ship the Organas and you know that the Organas would have shipped Olin/Lands.
FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?: come talk to me about it! Yell in all caps, or come whisper ‘hey I ship a thing.’ Send a carrier pigeon. Smoke signal. Morse code. Basically: just let me know!
TAGGED BY: @owncreator TAGGING: the dash! this is a good one to know/read about everyone. so if you haven’t done it yet, or haven’t done it in a while, you should do it.
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acrxssthestars · 7 years ago
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*゚‘゚・⁌ ⁑уσυ нανє уσυя мσмєитѕ      иσт мαиу σf тнєм              вυт уσυ ∂σ нανє тнєм⁑*゚‘゚・⁌                                    *゚‘゚・☆ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴇʏᴇs ᴄᴀɴ ᴅᴇᴄᴇɪᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ            ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴛʀᴜsᴛ ᴛʜᴇᴍ☆*゚‘゚・ Ferus Olin|Laine Kenobi|Indie Star Wars Roleplay Blog      Clone Wars era-The Last Jedi era                       Mun and Muse’s of age Open to randoms and plots!        
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mayxthexforce · 5 months ago
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@nieithryn
@mutatiio
i want you close like skin, but i don't say that. // your name is so perfectly sewn onto my tongue; / no matter how hard i try, the stitches won't come undone.
fatima aamer bilal, from moony moonless sky’s ‘when god pottered hands, i. your dishwasher is empty.’
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coolleatherjacket · 7 years ago
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✮ ━ top three favorite muses that you’ve played ☾ ━ how many pets do you own? if none, what kind of animals do you like?
@maraudlin | mun questions | accepting
✮ ━ top three favorite muses that you’ve played
oh boy surprise I actually play my top three! ferus olin of star wars legends (ex-jedi, resistance fighter, sassy to a fault and self blaming to a bigger fault) is my first character on tumblr, and he’s still going strong over at @bellassan! I love him so much if you like star wars you need to come talk to me about him
my other two favourites are both from twin peaks, dale cooper (low key psychic fbi agent, kinda off-kilter, always kind, incredibly well spoken) and laura palmer (she’s dead, wrapped in plastic - the 17 year old victim whose death coop is investigating), and I’ve played them both for years on my previous platform and recently brought both of them back to my multimuse @skymma. 
☾ ━ how many pets do you own? if none, what kind of animals do you like?
I OWN THE SWEETEST, MOST AFFECTIONATELY NEEDY CAT. her name is pyssel and she’s a rescue and I love her very much. she sleeps on top of me or under my blanket with me when I go to sleep. here she is!
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exitiumparit · 5 years ago
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@bellassan asked: # for roan
what your muse’s name is
 ICE Ferus Olin
what your muse’s picture is
 It was snapped by Remi and texted to Roan at the last big Lands family get-together
what your muse’s ringtone is
Standard Android ringtone, Roan doesn’t bother with ringtones
my muse’s last text to your muse:
[text: ICE Ferus Olin: 11:53 PM] Olin I swear to God I will get the divorce papers in the morning if you don’t get your ass in bed in the next ninety seconds, the work can WAIT until tomorrow
cell phone headcanons || accepting
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mayxthexforce · 4 years ago
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˜”*°• RULES & AFFILIATES •°*”˜
THIS IS A SIDEBLOG. I FOLLOW FROM @amalgamatus
˜”*°• Interest Tracker •°*”˜
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Muses List
COLOR CODE: BLUE = Jedi force user || RED = Dark Side User || ORANGE = No Alignment/Verse dependent force user || GREEN = not force sensitive || PINK = Mandalorian.
A ⭐ by the character's name means they're from Legends. A 🌙 means they're Legends based. A ☀️ means they're an OC.
PRE PREQUELS ERA: Arn Peralun(🌙) || Celeste Morne(⭐) || Elodore Vane(⭐) || Feemor(⭐) || Kycina(⭐) || Myles(⭐) || Ulic Qel Droma(⭐) || Yaddle (🌙).
PREQUELS ERA: Agen Kolar || Alpha 17 (⭐) || A'Sharad Hett(🌙) || Bossk(🌙) || Drakka Judarrl(⭐) || Feral Opress || Ferus Olin(⭐) || Garen Muln(⭐) || Jax Pavan(⭐) || Johhar Kessen || Jyl Somtay || Kilindi Matako(⭐) || Kung'urama'nuruodo/Nuru Kungurama(⭐) || Magash Drashi(⭐) || Melee(🌙) || Mellichae(⭐) || Niba'Donare Beriko (☀️) || Obi-Wan Kenobi(🌙) || Omega || Quinlan Vos || Rajeev Vratam(☀️) || Roan Lands(⭐) || Ros Lai(🌙) || Sabé || Sev'rance Tann(🌙) || Sian Jeisel(⭐) || Steela Gerrera || Trace Martez.
ORIGINAL TRILOGY/POST-PREQUELS ERA: Ailyn Vel(⭐) || Apailana (🌙) || Caij Vanda || Cal Kestis || Carnor Jax(🌙 ) || Chase Piru (⭐) || Dass Jennir (⭐) || Galen Marek(⭐) || Goran Beviin(⭐) || Han Solo(🌙 ) || Henrietya Antilles(⭐) || Irek Ismaren - Palpatine(⭐) || Kaeden Larte || Koska Reeves || Leia Organa(🌙) || Luke Skywalker(🌙) || Mahjo Reeloo || Maulkiller(⭐) || Medrit Vasur(⭐) || Merrin || Roganda Ismaren(⭐) || Scout(☀️) || Sianna Sekko (⭐) || Talon(🌙) || Tayala Akuna || The Dark Apprentice(⭐) || Vera Beroya || Xasha(⭐).
SEQUELS TRILOGY/POST-OT ERA: Anakin Solo (🌙) || Kaydel Ko Connix || Mirta Gev (🌙) || Voe.
Verses can be found by clicking on some names and on the doc linked above.
Find the dividers I use ✨ HERE ✨
PLEASE READ MY RULES BEFORE INTERACTING!
|| MEMES ||
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bellassan · 7 years ago
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(anon mask) platonic OTP Ferus Olin and totally canon Chyla Richi
@exitiumparit | tell me what characters you ship my muse with | (accepting)
one of the best familial ships, [shibe voice] best friends, good content, much love, very excellent 
honestly you know I’ll always be on board it’s one of my favourite friendships on here
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