#{{ I just wanna see everyone's results }}
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2009 Abu Dhabi Grand Prix - Sebastian Vettel(ft. Mark Webber & Jenson Button)
#fantastic podium!! maybe my favorite of this season?????#sebmarkson podiums are my fav ever nothing can top them#and both mark and jense were being so cute with seb this race aaaahhhhhhh <333333#theres something about seb that makes older men want to cuddle him and pick him up and pour champagne on him#haha thank you to dru for showing me seb getting drenched on this podium a few weeks and making me hype for this race!!#this race was very very good as well. like the last laps battle btwn mark and jense was insane#its very good when i already know the results of a race but the racing still makes me sit on the edge of my seat and scream a bit#i mentioned this before but i love how this race felt like an epilogue and it was nice to see everyone having fun and enjoying themseles#thank you everybody for joining me on another season journey!!! it been so much fun. ive really really enjoyed 2009#brawn is just soooooo cool to me. their story is insane!! im glad ive gotten to watch thru this season before the docu abt them comes out#but also very fun to see the beginning of rbr getting to the top of the field. every good result just felt so rewarding and worth it#anyways dont wanna do too much commentary abt it since ive discussed it a lot. onto 2010 next!!!! i shall miss you 2009#though i will say. it was rly interesting in this race to hear their team predictions for next season bcs a lot of it doesnt pan out#mark webber#jenson button#sebastian vettel#sebson#martian#sebmark#f1#formula 1#formula one#we do a little bit of f1#2009 abu dhabi gp#season: 2009
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Positive things to say about FEw 3 Hopes The extra support convos 💓 SO many good ones! I loved Ingrid and Marianne support so much 🥺
#fe3h#fire emblem warriors 3 hopes#ingrid brandl galatea#marianne von edmund#Dorte the horse#I did not nailed well what i wanted to do but still... I did what i could with this#also experimenting with colors#not really satisfy with the result but it's something#I want to see a convo between Balthus and Dimitri!!! will they fight?#or Cyril#OR Lindhart#IDK i just wanna know how everyone interact between each other#And just give me my Byleth Convos goddamnit
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One of the most frustrating things about the London special for me is that the way Marinette defeated the new Butterfly didn't actually solve anything. Like, at all.
Not only did Marinette for literally no reason only care about taking her own name out of the notebook, meaning all the other dozens of crucial informations the Butterfly gathered are still in there
But also that neither Marinette nor Alix gave a damn to even try and make sure that the Butterfly won't do something like this again just in an improved and even smarter way.
The reason why Alix was alarmed in the first place was because Cerise defeated Marinette at her first attempt and had to be stopped in the nick of time by a time travel hero from going through with the wish. Marinette's identity being found was NOT the event that alarmed Alix. It was the WISH. Marinette herself barely held any relevance beyond having been the one to conveniently wear both the Ladybug and Black Cat Miraculous in that night for Cerise to steal.
So all Marinette and Alix accomplished is that the Butterfly won't immediately go for the wish and Ladybug's identity again without an even better clever plan. That's it.
Cerise can still have used the rest of the summer break as prep time to find out every heros identity, especially Chat Noir's, every secret in all this, and even Marinette's identity again.
Cause again, what Cerise did "wrong" was immediately going all out. Not that she found out major information at all.
It is so unbelievably stupid to have Marinette and Alix act so brainless. At least don't praise them as the greatest and smartest heros of all time if you have them be this fucking incompetent.
Marinette doesn't even consider Chat Noir worthy of the information that a new Butterfly already exists, how smart they are, and that they would have already won at day 1 if it hadn't been for ALIX.
Every second that passes is Marinette now being willing to sacrifice Chat Noir's safety and life because she doesn't wanna have a conversation that isn't about her comfort.
Marinette herself would have been royally fucked if it hadn't been for BUNNIX and the Butterfly having made the wish, but she herself was utterly helpless.
Not to mention that Cerise barely even bothered with Maribug.
She didn't say a word. Didn't make a show out of her plan, didn't wake her up to rub it in. Nothing. She was already gone and making the wish before Marinette even woke up.
Maribug canonically has no reason to believe that the new Butterfly won't just adjust the plan and go for Chat Noir and the entire rest of the team first (that Marinette now made into targets again, lets hope her modifications of the Miraculous were safety precautions). Marinette was even explicitly written to be AWARE that whoever is underneath the Akuma mask won't remember shit about any of their interactions, so its not like Marinette has any reason to delude herself into believing the Butterfly is only after HER bc they formed this "life-altering rivalry" in battle.
The Butterfly literally barely paid Maribug any fucking mind. From Marinettes perspective, new Butterfly was on a mission and that was all the way through all they cared about. What excuse is there for Marinette to abandon everyone at the Butterfly's mercy now just because Alix is HER safety net? Especially Chat Noir who Marinette has no reason to not believe wont be the Butterfly's new target number one since they are after the wish?
Non of this adds up whatsoever. It is probably one of the worst displays of leadership and self-centeredness Marinette was ever written to act on on everyone's expense. And that says alot.
Marinette just completely abandons Chat Noir in particularly to get targeted by the new Butterfly however they please. There is no logical reason for why Marinette shouldn't expect the new Butterfly to do that beyond Marinette at this point being pretty much incapable of thinking about anyone or anything but primarily herself in her plans which makes her the worst possible person in her role, no matter how well she hits people.
They literally found HER identity at day fucking 1 and that situation being saved was entirely thanks to ALIX. Marinette herself was helpless and fucked. And now Marinette just leaves Chat Noir, Alya, and the entire rest of the team at fate's mercy for approximately 3 months of summer break because... well, I guess Madame "Ladybug will decide for the world what the truth is" hasn't authorized yet that reality is real, so she's for less than 0 reasons just being writing to think that the Butterfly must ask for her permission first to do exactly the same extremely clever and effective planning Marinette already witnessed, just that Marinette is the only one who has Bunnix privilege so everyone else will be doomed.
Well, that sure doesn't sound familiar at all. Doesn't remind me one bit of how Marinette in Kuro Neko just ignored Chat Noir's absence for who knows how long, telling herself "she selflessly allowed him vacation" instead of caring for 2 seconds about his safety, because I guess there too Marinette just decided that ShadowMoth has to ask for her permission first to have done something to Chat Noir behind her back...
... right after Ephemeral, the episode where ShadowMoth in fact did NOT ask for Maribug's girlboss permission first to have found and done something to Chat Noir behind her back.
Looks like History is predictably repeating itself in the worst way possible and Marinette continues proofing that she never learned anything. How wonderful.
I actually hope that Cerise used the summer break to just already find out about everything beforehand, besides Ladybug's identity, and just didn't act on the grand open plan yet because she did all the prepping first. Since those were the only two aspects that she would have learned to tackle last.
Sure would suck for everyone involved, especially ADRICHAT, but it might be the only way Marinette could actually start learning from her mistakes and be able to be a good hero again. With a villain that just does the obvious and smart moves instead of the writing continuing to dumb the villains down to pathetic degrees because somebody having a brain cell would be "mean" to Marinette who apparently can't consider anyone in anything anymore, no matter how obvious it should be.
#ml spoilers#ml london spoilers#ml season 6#marinette deserves better#shes just such a bad hero at this point who barely brings about any results because she doesn't think further than herself#Maribug back at it again sacrificing Chat in every way possible for her comfort cuz she doesn't wanna talk#i truly hope Cerise just gets to be smart and has used the past 3 months for prepping#i would love seeing her just... know everyone's identities besides Ladybug right from the start#it's just an obvious consequence#maybe Marinette will for once actually learn something again#if not and this is how Marinette will continue to be written? gosh she might end up as one of the worst main heros in a family cartoon#wtf is this?
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Leonardo: Now, the recipe calls for 2 shots of vodka.
Dazai: *upends the bottle*
#ikevamp#ikemen vampire#ikevamp leonardo#ikevamp leo#ikevamp dazai#let it be known that#1. these two should never be left unsupervised#2. these two should never be left to gang up on poor mozart (rip amadi taken from us too soon by shenanigans)#3. these two should never. EVER. cook together#the result will either be the tastiest thing in the world#or something fit to send you to outer space (and i. do not mean the fun way i mean the 'what dimension are we in?????' way)#i also love how with this one i don't even see leo being mad that fker would be like#'finally none of that weak sauce two drops of alcohol. i wanna get TRASHED'#while everyone else (except maybe arthur) looks on in dismay#leonardo there's gotta be a better coping mechanism--no squeezing mc's ass like a stress ball is not a valid coping mechanism--#(she said. like a LIAR--)#also man can i just say after reaching Dazai's rt ch.15#upending a whole ass bottle of vodka is a hard MOOD#i feel like i always wondered why i struggled to see him as a bias and now im just like#'of course i know him. he's me' meme#there's only room for one evasive clown in this house and its ME#although to be fair i do think i qualify more as a jester#alas what can a mfer do but meme and be strong for mother (comte)#source: incorrect quote generator
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*Poll inspired by typical ambiguity in the new audio story Victory of the Doctor, which on an unrelated note is amazing!
Evidence for each argument beneath the cut!
Open marriage
The Doctor's wedding to Marilyn Monroe occurs in A Christmas Carol, when he storms off to a chapel with lipstick marks on his face. “I’ll just go and get married then, shall I? See how you like that. Marilyn? Get your coat!”
While he wasn't yet with River then, he maintains this relationship afterwards, apparently with River involved. In the mini-episode Good Night, the Doctor enters the TARDIS with a euphonium, calling over his shoulder, “River! I’ll see you later! Tell Marilyn she’s too late, she’ll have to use the biplane. Take care!”
Another piece of evidence comes from The Wedding of River Song, when they're passive-aggressively flirting.
“Hallucinogenic lipstick. Works wonders on President Kennedy. And Cleopatra was a real pushover.” “I always thought so.” “She mentioned you.” “What did she say?” “Put down that gun.” “Did you?” “Eventually.” “Oh, they're flirting. Do I have to watch this?” (from Kovarian)
I've never understood the innuendo (please tell me what I'm missing), but Kovarian does, and as we know from The Husbands of River Song, the Doctor and River are both married to Cleopatra, so… it's definitely something.
There's also that diary page in The Eternity Clock game that suggests the Doctor, River, and Jim the Fish got blackout drunk at karaoke night and started “some sort of religion of love” which went on to last for centuries.
Serial cheaters
“How can you be engaged, in a manner of speaking?” The Doctor is jealous in Flesh and Stone before he's even kissed her, which doesn't set him up as a person who'd be interested in an open marriage.
“No, wait. That's your husband? That's who you're married to? Not anybody else?” In The Husbands of River Song, the Doctor is clearly not expecting the other husbands. Culminating in the same episode…
“So, King Hydroflax?” “Oh, how many times? I married the diamond!” “So you say.” “Elizabeth the First!” “Ramone!” “Marilyn Monroe!” “Stephen Fry!” “Cleopatra!” “Same thing!”
It appears he is well aware of her other spouses (and that she's aware of his); so perhaps his surprise was more that didn't expect her to be so flagrant about them. It makes him insecure (“I posed as his nurse. Took me a week.” “To fall in love?” “It's the easiest lie you can tell a man. They'll automatically believe any story they're the hero of.”) enough to start an argument about it.
River also expresses her jealousy as an obvious fact, as seen in The Day of the Doctor Novelization (written by Moffat who (along with Alex!!) knows the character best):
“Ow!” “Madame de Pompadour?” “Jealous?” “Of course I’m jealous. Keep your hands off her.”
In The Name of the Doctor, we learn that the Doctor, who has had a number of... sexually-charged moments with Clara (including, but not limited to, Victorian Clara), has avoided telling her that River is his wife. Vastra is uncomfortable with having to introduce them, having “gone a darker shade of green.”
“The Doctor might have mentioned me?” “Oh, yeah. Oh yeah, of course he has. Professor Song! Sorry, it's just I never realized you were a woman.” (from Clara)
Actually both
This could mean many things (i.e. open marriage with boundaries which are violated), but potentially, all the same evidence from prior arguments! With a shade of “Our lives are back to front.”
In the mini-episodes First Night/Last Night, when River, having burst into the TARDIS and pretended to faint, mistakes her past self for another woman the Doctor's hiding from her, she openly expresses jealousy.
“Doctor. Have you brought someone else here? Does anyone agree to wear that dress? Where is she!” “River, think it through!” “This happened the last time we were here. You brought someone else!” “No I didn’t!” “Yes you did, I heard you talking to her!”
However, when a third and significantly older version of River makes the same mistake, she no longer expresses jealousy, but rather curiosity, which could at least signal a shift in how she sees their marriage.
Maybe there was a conversation that happened. Maybe it slipped the Doctor's mind when he forgot Clara.
Actually neither
This could also mean multiple things, but one of those things is this. The Doctor is a widower from the start. Likewise, River is well aware of Doctor's death on Trenzalore, “of course River would know, she's always known,” having been raised to prevent those events, and having refused to be bound by that destiny.
How can fidelity be defined the same way for time travelers? Everyone's spouses are dead somewhen. River understands the paradox of her husband's existence better than anyone. To quote The Day of the Doctor Novelization yet again…
‘Because you live in a time machine. All of history is still happening outside those doors. On a good night that means everyone you ever met is still alive and you can’t wait to see them again. On a bad night, it means everyone’s dead, and you want to charge around the universe, pretending you can do something about that.’ She looked up at me. ‘I know which version of you I prefer.’
And there she was, so alive again. I remembered her, twisted, burnt and dead, in the depths of The Library. ‘What if there are people who died because of me?’ I asked. ‘What if there are people I should have saved?’
‘People die. All people, everywhere. We grieve and we move on. That is how we respect the dead. That is how we forgive ourselves in their presence and their absence.’
Please feel free to add anything I missed!
#River Song#eleventh doctor#twelfth doctor#yowzah#11th doctor#12th doctor#the doctor#doctor who#new who#please no hate votes from people who hate the ship/just wanna slander them. thank you for your consideration. <3#also I know there is very much the possibility 'monogamy plus threesomes with both parties involved' wherein everything else is cheating#which fits them well as anything given the evidence. anyway- if that's how you read them- vote as you see most accurate!#at the end of the day its all about consent#btw i do have an opinion that isn't likely to change by the results- but im not gonna risk the integrity of this poll by saying it.#this is an interesting aspect of a ship I love and I wanna see how fans interpret it! (please be civil tysm ilysm)#thank you everyone that votes!#words by seaweed#disclaimer that cheating is morally repugnant. ALSO this relationship IS built on lies. 'rule one: the doctor lies. so do I! all the time'
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i made another post like this a few weeks ago so im gonna ask this one more time…
#i just wanna see the results / what everyone says for a boy this time#so im leaving on reblogs and opening up replies#jaime x brienne#braime#i think joanna won last time for a girls name
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im crying these results are actually so fucking funny. still putting scott in jail but to the three Everyone Sucks Here voters. I love you
#he got away with 16 NTA votes! Congrats scott#And the 5 NAH votes are also so interesting to me#Overall. Surprisingly varied and fascinating results!#I’d love to know how many of these were from people with context for wcsmp and without. What's the ratio#Because if I was a casual wcsmp viewer and had to vote I’d be more inclined towards nta. If I was normal about scott at least#And of course YTA would be higher if all the context/a different perspective was given but to me its a fun thought experiment#because its very much written as scott sees it. thats him trying to explain it as fairly as possible#So. Hm. its just so interesting#Sorry for once again talking about this like everyone knows what im talking about. I do wanna put together a post for the ten remaining-#wcsmp fans on this website at some point.#theyre starving man#nbanbts au#bree barks so fucking loud
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god my current theatre classes at the local centre turned out to be kind of a bummer. I cannot back out now since I have a role but I'd really want to... fortunately in less than few months it should be done
#txt#euuuugghhh#idk im tired i dont wanna go there this week but like i have to cause everyone is frustrated and wants to just get this play that we've#been dragging around for far too long to finish#just get it over with#good thing that there wont ba any lessons during the winter break hehe#but like. my exams are also a thing and i hope they dont expect me to be there every week. as callous as this sounds#like i see many problems which result in this situation#but if people arent coming regularly which tbh i understand why#and im there every week#then yeah#let this be a lesson for the future: we need to go into theatre of movement and dance more. the classical old type method#that we are taught with#is so fucking exhausting to me beyond comprehension#damn. now thats a rant amirite#it did give me some good things too so its not all bad and im glad i got to have this shitty experience#the only way out is. painfully through the fucking thing
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i wish i was good at art so people would be interested in my ocs.
except that's a lie. i don't even really enjoy making art besides doodles. what i love is writing. so i think what i actually want is for everyone to fall in love with reading.
and like obviously i get it. im weird. i spent a large part of my youth reading wikis for games i never played, shows i never watched. i still do tbh. i have always loved seeking out superfluous information. bc it was *like* reading a story, except you only had the separate pieces and had to put them together like puzzle to get the whole story
it's a bit like history, now that i think about it.
and i LOVE finding somebody who has OCs with thousands of words of backstory. that's the fastest way to get me interested. a simple doodle and then a wiki entry of information.
idk. i guess im just venting a bit. it feels a bit unfair. every pro-OC post is geared towards artists. people who love to draw. but I just don't. i mean yeah i like making little doodles, but frankly it's about the same enjoyment i get from solving basic math equations.
and fucking obviously i love and treasure all my artist friends. if you are seeing this and you love to draw your OCs, I love you. I would never begrudge you your happiness.
it's times like these i wish forums hadn't really died out. i want a community. i want to make that connection. but i feel ignored bc my talents don't align with the current state of things in the greater community.
whatever. whatever. i just hate venting bc i worry about making people feel bad but sometimes I feel bad. and ive never been able to talk about feeling bad without getting yelled at. Which isn't healthy, of course, and I know that, and Im slowly trying to break the habit of just shoving it down. and Ive had a drink so im willing to be more open so uh. there, i guess. i feel like dogshit that i have neither the energy nor the inclination to draw my OCs and that it's literally fucking impossible to get your OCs noticed through writing. nothing really to be done about it. that's just how life goes. not all hobbies are meant for all people.
#titi talks#vent#all the time in my youth i would tell myself I'd just get good at drawing and then draw so-and-so idea#but it's been like a decade now. so frankly i think it's just not going to happen#like i said ive had a drink (and a strong one at that) so my ability to reason is slightly impaired#but ive mostly accepted it. ive swallowed down the bitter pill that nobody but me cares#and it's not like i haven't tried art! but it just takes so much goddamn energy to produce a result worth anything#my arts a bit shit. and that's fine! no shame in that#but it hurts a lot to post into a discord art channel#that has a RULE that you must acknowledge the previous poster's art before you may post your own#and STILL get fucking ignored. like they broke the rules to ignore you and everyone after agreed with it#or when you say 'this is the one thing I am proud of being able to draw'#and somebody you hold in high esteem goes#'hey do you wanna see me do that better and in a quarter of the time?'#AND AGAIN THIS IS NOT TO DISPARAGE THOSE WHOSE TALENT IS IN ART#YOU ARE WONDERFUL AND VALUABLE#i just wish *I* had some value#my talents earn me nothing. and it hurts.#and ive even stopped writing bc i don't have the energy often#and even if i did it's not like anybody gives half a shit
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Another morning another day
I've been thinking a lot about going to the animal shelter
#speculation nation#there r many cats there and i have an aching spot available for one#passively thinking about getting a kitten. just bc id enjoy getting to raise a cat for once#and i think tally would be a good big sister given how much she groomed cassy#at the same time tho i wanna adopt a cat that might not otherwise be adopted so quickly. aka an adult cat#& also like with tally. i very purposefully picked out the loud black cat bc everyone was passing her up#but she was YELLINGGG at me from the cage. and i was like 'oh alright' and took her home#and now shes my sweet darling girl. she just needed like a year to chill out so she is no longer a chaos demon lmao#it's also hard to know what youre getting with a kitten. and it's a lot of resposibility. so like. idk.#but also. Kitten Cute... 🥺#i'll have to see what they have when i go there. still not happening for at least a few more days.#it feels too soon rn. but im thinking about this all to cope lol. i hate having only one cat.#i keep wanting to go out to greet Cat Number 2 in the living room. but. nope. so i go back to greet tally on my bed#she's a loving cat but she does Not like to be smothered. and im kind of smothering her lmao#that's another reason to get a 2nd cat. yes i want tally to have company when im gone at work#but also i need a second cat that is very affectionate bc I Want My Hugs And Kisses Dammit#idk when im getting his ashes back. probably somewhat soon. id estimate tomorrow? they were rly quick with sammy's#idk what im gonna do if they call while im at work lol. cry probably.#tho i havent cried in almost a full day!! been like 22 hours. i have been Trying to cope. mixed results.#ah well. c'est la vie and all that shit.#animal death ment/
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2009 Italian Grand Prix - Rubens Barrichello & Jenson Button
#i didnt realize rubens won two gps this season!!#im just vaguely aware how many gps everyone else wins so i was sooo convinced lewis was gonna win this since ik he wins two#so that means jense doesnt win any more races? I know he already won 6 but that was months ago for me...i miss my boy on the top step :(#also kimi was on this podium too i just couldnt figure out how to fit him in so this just brawn boys cause i love them!!!#help why am i feeling so endeared to the old man#anyways its been a pretty bad run of races for me hahaha no offense i just wanna see one of my 3 favs on the top step!!!#though at least after singapore itll be a straight RBR run(i tried not to spoil myself but some race results are burned into my brain)#ended up making this way too late at night bcs i was gaming a while and then for some reason thought it was a good idea to finally gif this#so not my fav work tbh bcs of several reasons(not a lot of good footage honestyl!!!)#rubens barrichello#jenson button#brawn#brawn gp#f1#formula 1#formula one#we do a little bit of f1#2009 italian gp#season: 2009
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#its always the fucking chemistry projects that ruin my life#not ready to go back to school ... getting home late & eating the same food everyday & having less free time & hanging out with the same few#people i honestly! don’t even like that much.. zzz i don’t wanna receive my test results either – esp not for math#and i KNOW it gets 100x worse in a college/uni/work environment i think i’m just being a bit of a crybaby but i can’t bring myself to#look forward to anything at all. pass my exams & graduate yay ^__^ -> immediately go back and study some more#then i’ll have to get a job and afhjdkf... maybe i’m thinking too far ahead but it all feels inevitable anyways so does it matter if i am?#i don’t know why i’m struggling so much compared to my peers who don’t see any of this as an issue at all#was i cursed to be sad since primary school#i can’t even talk to anyone about it because my dad [ though he has good intentions ] almost always ends up feeding me a variant of#think about your future Or thats just how student life is. meanwhile my mom will begin a competition of Who Has It Worse?!#my sister has her own stuff going on and my religious aunt will say something along the lines of [ have faith & go with the flow ]#i wish i had someone to confide in but i only ever really have myself i think. it sucks cuz no one seems to get it at all#i know objectively thats probably not true but. ahh i feel so disconnected from everyone#cw negative#cw vent#i didnt intend for this to become a whole thing but i got carried away#💭
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𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐅𝐄𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 & 𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐒
RULES: bold for usually, italics for sometimes [ source ]
HAPPINESS. being unable to stop smiling. laughter. bear hugs. happy tears. waving arms around. dancing. contently sighing. eyes twinkling. laughter lines. childlike playfulness. skipping. talking more. affection. cracking more jokes than usual. gesturing more when talking. higher pitched voice. squealing. jumping around. clapping.
SADNESS. tearing up. self-hugging. one-arm cross. an aching chest. scratchy throat. a runny nose. turning away. deep breaths. quivery smiles. crying. infantile sobbing. hands gripping each other or an object. covering mouth. puffy eyes. eyes appear red. voice breaking. a distant or empty stare. monotone voice. asking for comfort. faking a smile. crumbling. shaking. whimpering. abusing an unhealthy habit. withdrawing from others. big teary eyes. doing something even if it could hurt them.
ANGER. furrowed brows. baring teeth. passive-aggressive comments. avoiding eye contact. sarcasm. headache. sore muscles. hiding clenched fists. irritability. jumping to conclusions. raising voice. going silent. demanding immediate action. keeping it all in until exploding. body tensing. making risky decisions. middle finger. crying.
FEAR. wanting to flee or hide. what-ifs. images of what-could-be flashing in mind. uncontrollable trembling. rapid breathing. screaming. a skewed sense of time. irritability. keeping silent. denying fear. turning away from the cause. pretending to be brave. nail-biting. lip-biting. scratching skin. a joking tone but a voice that cracks. fainting. insomnia. panic attacks. exhaustion. substance abuse. tics. rushing adrenaline. face draining of colour. hair lifting on the back of the neck. feeling rooted to the spot. making body as small as possible. staring but not seeing. crying. a shrill voice. whispering. gripping something or someone. stuttering. flinching at noises. pleading.
EXHAUSTION. constantly yawning. slurring words together. dark circles or lines under eyes. mood swings. hallucinations. calling people by the wrong name. dizziness. denying they’re tired. slow blinking. trouble concentrating. stumbling. leaning on a doorframe for support. sluggish movements. falling asleep someplace that isn’t a bed. becoming irritated by the smallest things. “i’m awake, i’m fine”. shaking so bad they spill their drink. fall asleep in their clothes. lay their head on the table because they’re so tired. passing out.
tagged by: stolen from @fallenphxtxgrapher tagging: @artificeheart ; @dilucisms ; @wolfkcst ; @zorkaya ; @narvvhal ; @cryosewn ; @voyage-inferno ; @maquiscursed ; @ccaptain ; @dandelicnfang ; @ofhope ; @reginrokkr ; @goldenarchitect ; @barbatosguidesus ; @melodicbreeze ; @drolliic ; @vibraea ; @falseamore + you!
#【 dash games | this is getting interesting. 】#【 isms | heart of the abyss. 】#{{ part of the reason why i don't often tag people in dash games is bc I have this mighty need to tag everyone on my dash asjfkaak }}#{{ I just wanna see everyone's results }}
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#no need to read or react just needed to rant about my brain a bit#the next two weeks are supposed to be super exciting with BC giving us a new look and song and music video#it's umk week and my favorite for once has historically great odds of winning and a good chance to do well at eurovision as well#I'm going to see umk live with my dear sister and stay at a hotel so it's like a mini-getout and then I'm going to stockholm and oslo gigs#this is supposed to be best times of the year so far but my brain decided we can't have any of that :)#last year at this same time I got hit hard with depression and the anxiety I've always had got even worse#it got to the point that nothing made me happy or feel anything at all and I just cried all day for weeks#everything about UMK night was blurry and sad because I wasn't talking to my bestie who I've watched eurovision with for 10 years#I just started crying during the Dark Side/ Bad Idea opening and the results felt like nothing#I'll always assiociate Bad Idea with my depression because it was playing on the radio in the nurse's office when I got my meds#anyway I can feel that same darkness crawling back to my brain right now and I'm very scared#my brain decides I don't deserve to be happy and screams about how unloveable and ridiculous and embarrassing and ugly I am#it isn't helping that Joel keeps reposting the most model-looking tiktokers because I always feel a hot gush of shame run through me#and everytime I see a pic of any of their blonde skinny young gfs I just wanna kms#now it's gotten to a point that the voice in my head yells at me that I don't deserve Bc or their music and I should cancel my gig trip#because they wouldn't wanna see a disgusting cow myself being so near the stage not to mention ask for a pic or autograph#and I should just hide in my apartment forever#and everyone who has ever been nice to me is either doing that out of pity or making fun of me behind my back#I can't take this anymore#delete later
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the career advisor basically summed up and asked me if i wanna be an inventor? which us such a vague term idk what that even entails but yeah it does sound super cool afkldhl
#but i also kinda have like this thing where when sb else asks me if i want smth really enthusiastically.. i will enthusiastically agree#so like i have to think on that sjldhl#it seemed to me like she expected that I really wanna involve my chemistry education in what i do in the future#and idk how much i want that#like i think I'd want that to be a part of it in some way#but why does everyone expect me to like come up with something completely new#maybe it's the image i come up with myself tho#but sometimes i feel like ppl expect so much and i can really gove them so little..#sometimes ppl have a very mystical idea of science as well#new discoveries are mostly luck but also skill#like i did say that since i was young i was interested in the materials that packaging is made of#and i would like to invent a durable biodegradable alternative to plastic and stuff#but man it's really not as easy as you might imagine agpfdnofj#like ppl are STRUGGLING to invent a completely biodegradable plastic#some decay into microplastics instead#and another problem is they'd just dissolve#sometimes i do wonder if it's even worth the effort to try?#the thing is. i just wanna do something that would like let me see results .#every day at work#and research is just so long winded i don't have the mental energy for it?#well this was my daily diary entry
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Been watching Vinesauce's Tomodachi Life playthrough, and I just got to the part where Donkey Kong steals Two-Faced away from Walrus. And honestly? My brain's been braining a headcanon about that whole situation
So Donkey Kong is aware that he's in a game, right? And Two-Faced & Walrus were suspecting some malevolent god was messing with him... Here's my take on what happened:
Two-Faced notices that Walrus has been treated terribly, and Vinésauce kept being pushed on her despite her lack of interest. Maybe she talks to Donkey Kong, and finds out they're in a game. And she draws the line between Vinésauce and Walrus' terrible treatment. So, torn between the love she feels for Walrus, versus the literal universe treating him like a punching bag, she and DK make a show of deciding to date each other, essentially breaking up with Walrus and making him into more of a sympathetic figure.
Sure enough, everything becomes better for Walrus near instantly. And from that moment, she knows that the literal universe is fixating on HER. And isn't that a creepy thought? That the god of your universe is trying to push you into a relationship with its avatar? And punishes those you do decide to date?
#bulletbilltime rambling#vinesauce tomodachi life#vinesauce tomodachi life spoilers#I don't doubt someone else has thought of this before#and maybe it even comes up in a later episode#and sure I can definitely still see two-faced as being a bit shitty for dumping walrus even in this scenario#but at the same time I don't envy her#girlie has been in the crosshairs of the literal god of your universe#and everyone she goes out with is cursed as a result#that is honestly a really fucked up thing to go through#BY THE WAY I WANNA CLARIFY THAT I AM NOT GENUINELY TRASHING VINESAUCE OVER THIS#THIS IS ALL JUST IN-LORE STUFF#REAL LIFE VINESAUCE WAS JUST HAVING FUN WITH A VIDEO GAME#it's just fun to ponder how this sort of stuff would shake out in the actual lore
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