#{ i love me some complex layers when it comes to characters xD }

[erisweekofficial]

We're thrilled to shine a light on @zenkindoflove!!! Amanda is an absolute gem in the Elucien fandom AND Eris fandom and has also blessed us with Alexius, her incredible OC for her Eris x OC fics.

Alexius stands out as one of the few male OCs in the community, and the dynamic between him and Eris is nothing short of captivating. Think forced proximity, delicious yearning, witty banter, political intrigue, and all the tension you could dream of. You can see them in both Summer Heat (which has Elucien) and Pull Me in Deeper, which... y'all you gotta read this asap😍🤭🥵 Also the mods are begging you to read Taste of You, a short and delightfully smutty one shot.

And PLEASE admire this amazing art of Alexius and Eris!

Read more to learn about how @zenkindoflove was inspired to create content about Eris AND her extremely helpful tips for writing content about him. (We're taking notes)

What inspired you to start creating content about Eris?  I became curious about writing Eris after he was featured in some of my Elucien fics. When I started my multichapter Elucien fic Summer Heat, I decided that I would give him a male love interest in that fic and create an OC - which ended up being Alexius who you see featured in all of my Eris work. I originally intended for it to be a background relationship, but I decided to experiment and write the scene of their first meeting (a very smutty scene) just to do some character exploration. I didn’t intend to include it in the fic, but then once I wrote it, I knew that it was something special and Eris x Alexius became a true B storyline in that fic with a fully fleshed out love story. After that, I wanted to expand and write fics that focused on them which I've written several now and more to come for Eris Week! It's a bit niche. Hardly anyone writes Eris x Male OC but I'm obsessed now.

What's your favorite piece you've created featuring Eris and why? 

That would be my Eris x Alexius multichapter fic - Pull Me in Deeper. I love it because it was a way for me to explore Eris’ character when he is out of the watchful eye of his father and others in Prythian. It’s also just a fun action/adventure/romance story and I got to explore more lore and character building for my OC Alexius as well. Alexius was designed to be, in my opinion, the perfect person for Eris and that means often standing in contrast to a lot of his personality traits and pushing him outside of his comfort zone. So it was an incredibly fun dynamic to explore. And it’s two gay men who are on a quest to find out (*spoilers*) if unicorns exist XD.

How do you approach writing dialogue for Eris? 

I tend to lean into Eris being more careful with his words - so he is sharp, concise, and efficient in his word choice. Depending on who he’s sharing a scene with and the context, he can be severe and short or he can be long-winded and eloquent. And of course, he has banter and jabs a plenty. So I try to balance all those sides of him depending on the context.

Do you have any advice for other creators wanting to make Eris content? 

Eris inhabits a unique space in canon where he is truly a free agent when it comes to relationships. So, I would recommend if you want to write romances with Eris to lean into self-indulgence and write the pairing/story you really want to tell and try to let go of what you think will be popular. And if that ends up being Eris x OC rather than a canon character, know that it can actually be such a rewarding experience even if you don’t have a built in audience. Creating an OC to pair with Eris has been immensely fun and has broadened my creativity. Eris is a complex, interesting character with so many layers and building someone to fit him and find out what is underneath all of those layers can lead you down quite an obsessive path. But a fun one. 

Please give us a name for one of Eris’s Brothers

Kian. He is the third oldest and is more of a scholarly type. Now that second brother Conan is dead, he is next in line after Eris.

Please give us a name for one of Eris's Dogs.

Lithia. She just had puppies in PMID and Eris is worried about her. 

[superherotiger]

hm so you'll ramble about the wips that won't even be complete in 5+ years but you won't finish the luna fic? okay worm (I'm a hypocrite)

Me tryna find the third chapter of fault lines like:

You’re on THIN ice bestie, but I’ll never refuse a chance to ramble haha, especially if it’s about the Outsider POV!!

‘It’s A Quiet Starry Place’ is by far my favourite AU from all the dadneto fics I’ve written! It kills me that I haven’t been able to work on it lately because there is just so much to dig into with this concept, especially in regards to Luna! Like where do I even begin?

I knew from the start that Laura and Luna’s dynamic was going to be a core part of this story, and getting to explore the world through their eyes is as fascinating as it is challenging. Logan (the film not the character lol) did such a good job at showing Laura as this highly competent and dangerous mutant but also as an innocent, learning child. It’s an interesting balance, and trying to figure out what they do and don’t understand because of their upbringing is something I have to ask myself almost every moment while writing the fic (which is why it takes so long to write too XD).

And of course, it wouldn’t be one of my fics if dadneto and quickson wasn’t the star of the show! I think Luna’s POV provides one of the most interesting, layered and complex perspectives of Erik and Peter that I’m probably ever going to have to tackle in this AU. Not only does this installment hint to a lot of events that have happened in their past, but Luna’s introduction is one of the most contentious points in their whole relationship. It’s easy to see that Peter accepts her as his own daughter almost immediately, but there’s still so much guilt and shame there for not knowing and not being able to protect her that weighs on him. And when all Peter needs is support, Erik is too busy struggling with his own thoughts, because how could the humans have gotten their hands on their son’s DNA? How could a violation like that have happened without any of them knowing? Erik’s protectiveness over Peter blinds him to realising that Peter has willingly taken on the role as a father himself, and in response, Peter’s protectiveness over Luna bites back, putting them at odds. It’s such an interesting dynamic, and it’s the plotline I’m most looking forward to writing in the coming chapters (because they are coming, I promise- I PROMISE OKAY?!?!)!

Some other elements that I love to think about but don’t always get to touch on because it’s from Luna’s POV is how the other X-Men and Brotherhood members are feeling over having clone children, most of which died before even knowing they existed. Some are quick to consider them their child, like Avalanche and Jean, who clearly took it hard learning that their respective kids had died without ever getting to meet them. Others have more complicated feelings about it, like Sabretooth and Gambit, which we’ll get a glimpse of in the next chapter. Sabretooth especially is interesting I think, because given the chance, I think he would have tried to be a decent father, if only to say he was better at it than Logan hah. Since he never had that opportunity though, he finds it easier to pretend he never cared about his kid instead of admitting that he might be mad at himself for not saving them in time.

If any of you are wondering how much I’ve thought about this AU, there’s a 12 page document dedicated just to the timeline, and I also have a list of all 23 children in the X23 program and who they belonged to lol. So yes, this AU lives in my head rent free and refuses to get evicted hahah!

Thanks for letting me ramble about this AU on top of all the other times I’ve rotted to you about it bestie, I love you!

-Superherotiger

Send me an ask about the backstory of any of my fics and I’ll ramble!! ✨

[waheelawhisperer]

I wish you weren't still hidden by tumblr both for yourself and so I knew when you reblogged my posts XD

Anyway, I get what you meant in the tags visa V Cinder's backstory coming too late. I confess I feel otherwise, I feel Atlas was the best time for her backstory to be revealed.

Maybe, maybe V6 could work to help set up "Hey Atlas is a horrible place". But there's something about seeing more and more layers of terriblness in real time as the city comes crashing down that works for me.

FFS tumblr free me from this hell I love not being able to reply to things and not having my reblogs show up in notifications

Anyway I think my dissatisfaction with the placement of Cinder's backstory is more a function of RWBY's real-world runtime and release schedule than the in-universe pacing, and by this I mean Cinder's backstory coming out in Volume 8 would bug me far less if I knew nothing of RWBY, began watching it today, and binged it over the next week or whatever instead of waiting 8 real-life years to find out what was going on with the most prominent villain in the series (yes, Salem is the Big Bad, but Cinder has been the antagonist most directly involved with the plot. Until Volume 8, Salem just parked her ass on her throne).

Unfortunately, that's not what happened. We did have to wait 8-ish years for Cinder's backstory, and, as a result, it is demonstrably true that a significant subset of the fanbase simply isn't invested in Cinder anymore. They dislike her, they think she's boring, they're not invested in her anymore, they think it took too long to give her any meaningful depth, they're tired of seeing her on-screen... and honestly, I get it. I like Cinder personally, but I can certainly understand why people would be dissatisfied with her portrayal.

From a narrative perspective, considering what Cinder's backstory is, it makes sense to reveal it when the story travels to Atlas. Your post does a good job of illustrating why, so I won't go over it again. I think personally I'd have partitioned out a few more tidbits in Volumes 4/5/6 just to keep the audience invested, but I'm not sure how to squeeze the bulk of it in earlier without significantly restructuring the post-Beacon aspects of the show.

I think my issues here ultimately stem from RWBY's broader difficulties with matching the scope and complexity of its story to its available resources. RWBY is a very ambitious show and tries to tell a big, spectacular story, but it just doesn't have the runtime to do it effectively. I love the ambition, I really do, but I wish RWBY's showrunners would do a better job of aligning the story they're telling with the resources they have to tell it.

Of course, it's easy for me to say that when I don't have to write under the same constraints they do. I'm not pretending to be an expert on filmmaking or screenwriting, and I don't think what they're doing is as easy as some of the loudest critics seem to think. That said, I really think the show would've been better served by introducing Salem later, given that her presence kind of warps everything around her, but I definitely think the show would've been better served by either cutting out some of the less important characters and storylines (from what I know of what the crew has actually decided to cut, some of the things they chose to prioritize were... interesting) or by hiring more people, paying and treating them properly, and improving the production process so that they could actually tell a story that had the scope they want.

[ikemenomegas]

I love love the character of the alpha in jjk. their relationship with gojo is super complex and the alpha's character itself is super complicated itself and thats why i love them sm. you mentioned before that they keep their silence when things get bad and i got reminded of my own experiences as the youngest child in a family where i had to shut up about my own sufferings just to keep the peace in the family and sooner or later, the person will blow up and thats what makes this character so interesting because you see how theyre keeping themselves together but we can also read their thoughts and we know that they are not okay and you're just waiting for the moment they'd go apeshit. And i also like how their relationship with gojo is the way it is because they both are shamans before they are two human beings deeply in love.

ANYWAYS BACK TO BEING IGNORANT OF CANON

Nobara sending a message to gojo asking why tf didnt he turn up for class to which gojo replies with a picture of of himself and his alpha beside him in disneyland wearing mickey mouse merch and telling her he's on a busy and dangerous mission

the alpha and nanami talking and purposely ignoring gojo annoying them

Thank you anon! It's been super fun putting together a layered character who suits this world but also a lot of work haha.

Oof, I'm the eldest daughter (and eldest child) in my family and I think this is something the eldest and the youngest often shake hands on, is that you frequently have to put aside your own suffering in order to be responsible or keep the peace. And this emotional pressure cooker eventually does blow up, but because it's everything, and when it goes on long enough there's nowhere to aim those feelings, it means that complicated feelings go everywhere, there's no single person or situation at fault so it feels like it's everything going wrong. One thing that's also a curse of the youngest is probably seeing every interaction between the rest of your family, on top of how the you are feeling, and being incredibly disturbed by how those interactions play out and are affected by personal bias and selfishness.

I think we forget a lot that even though there's only two kids, Megumi is the youngest and part of his "I only want to be responsible for my people, not the rest of the world" comes from that place of seeing how everyone around him takes on so much responsibility and justification it makes them crazy and his resentment at the world for doing that to them.

But yes!! Back to the fun happy times hahaha:

Oh my gosh, can you imagine how many curses there would be in a place like theme park where emotions and desires and disappointments are running high??? There probably are curses lurking around and they are at work but the "busy and dangerous" part is Gojo trying to get alpha to go on all of the roller-coasters together.

If Nobara complains loud and long enough, the whole first year class might "end up with" a surprise extra day off and oh look, Megumi just happens to have a set of tickets lol. Satoru is a troll, but even he would agree with getting the kids out to a theme park at some point - however the tickets aren't from him, the tickets are alpha who felt bad that Satoru was making fun of her all the time XD. Except Satoru makes them clean up some curses while they're in the area so it's not much of a vacation...

Alpha and Nanami, their cute kouhai, trying to read a map or something while Satoru has shown up to check on them and make a ruckus is killing me haha. Eventually Nanami's hinting "please deal with that" glances get to be too much and you have to buy Satoru a snack to shut him up for a minute and remind him he's cared for.

[bl-recs-and-reviews]

Don't you think it's funny cause actual canon gay characters in BL manga/manhwa will say "I love you" but only the shounen bromance can spew out some of the most romantic shit akin to a 19th century poet writing a letter expressing his surpressed love for his lover 😭.....

Hi anon~

It is indeed interesting how a lot of bromances tend to get so much intensity. They get very homo in their no homo xD

There's many reasons for that actually! For example, if we take wuxia dramas, in a lot of occasions they were gay in the source material. In kdramas, they have lately been going stronger at the bromances and playing with misunderstandings and other characters being like "oh I thought you guys were together", in a very queerbaity way (probably for the female audience) because they know it's popular and it will create buzz and hype.

But if we're talking shounen manga, most of the bromances there are so intense because of the layers of complexity their relationship has. Why was SasuNaru so popular? Because what better than having two people, both terribly lonely having finally found a friendship that is taking them out of that place only for it to break in the most tragic manner (one choosing the wrong path because of his inner demons and the other trying to stop him) in which their emotions are literally represented by a physical fight? And we generally do not see that happen with female characters, only between the male characters (I blame misoginy).

I do wish there was more of that intensity we see in bromances in BL. Or actually, I wish some of those bromances became romances, when it makes sense. But apparently markets are not ready for that 🤷‍♀️

However, my favorite romantically poetic line that I've ever seen comes from a movie:

You're a child. An infant. Your mocking is thus infantile. He's not my boyfriend. This man is more to me than you can dream. He's the moon when I'm lost in darkness and warmth when I shiver in cold. And his kiss still thrills me, even after a millennia. His heart overflows with the kindness of which this world is not worth of. I love this man beyond measure and reason. He's not my boyfriend. He's all and he's more.

This is from The Old Guard, a Netflix movie. If you haven't seen it, go watch it. It'll be worth it~~

I am sure there is more like this out there in BL or Queer media, we just gotta look hard for it ;)

[amuseoffyre]

I was tagged by @mxmollusca and I’m procrastinating on finishing a craft project so here we go :D

Do you write in order?

Yes. I have to. I can’t write out of sequence because that means I’m writing the interesting scenes and once they’re done, brain is like “welp, we’ve finished all the important stuff” and I’m left sitting, going “NO. NO WE HAVE CONNECTIVE TISSUE TO ADD!” and brain is already onto the next thing and accelerating.

The one very large exception to this was my Out of Time book series. Turns out that the first scene I wrote of that was the initial template for book 5 and then I went “oh wait, I need to know the cause of this thing” and next thing I knew, I had a 5-book series 😅

How fully formed does your writing come out the first try?

For fic? Always. The majority of what you see on my AO3 is my first draft, usually without even a read-through before posting. I just keysmash until its out of my head and post it as soon as its done. Is this unwise? Probably. Does this mean its littered with spelling/grammar/repetition issues? Very likely. Do I give one single fig about that? No. I’m not being paid to do this. The minute it’s finished, my brain is already on the move again.

That said, I usually have no idea what that “fully-formed” will look like. I’ve reached a point in my writing experience that I recognise something that will be important when I write it into a scene, but I may not know why it’s important, what it’s there for or - in some extreme cases - even what it is until it becomes relevant. And yet I will still absolutely know it has to be there.

A good example for this is Storm Surge. I had a vague shape of the thing and how it would end, but at ever turn, the characters kept on pouring in more and more stuff and I was having to improvise my way out of so many fixes or use what they had given me to enhance things. Don’t get me wrong, it’s wild and exciting, but good grief, can’t I know what’s happening in my story before it happens?

How many drafts do you go through?

See above XD

Novels or short stories, on the other hand, take some more work. Even then it may not be a full-rewrite, but more looking at scenes and going “hm. no” and chopping them up or replacing them entirely. I have had to retire some truly delightful dialogue.

Tell me about your process.

For fics, it’s usually a case of getting an image or moment stuck in my head and then keyboard smashing it out of my head. Often for too many hours. Frequently mucking up my already mucked up hands. One weekend I did 18k. I regretted it on the Monday.

For original stuff, it’s a similar thing with scenes and moments lodging in my brain, only I have to do so much more work on every aspect of it. Fic is relaxing because I don’t need to world-build or create new people from scratch within a certain set of parameters or time limits. Creating a character who is interesting, complex, layered and fun to write is hard.

Another added complication is that my brain is as ADHD as they come and cannot for the love of anything choose a genre to write. I’ve written historical supernatural romance, queer time travel shenanigans across 6 centuries, noir, sci-fi, mythology.

It’s a spin of a wheel what I’ll work on next. I couldn’t tell you from one day to the next.

If anyone would like to answer these questions, tag! You’re it :D

[undeadunalive]

Just me thinking about Jonathan as usual....

My heart hurts at the mere thought of what the Great War did to Jonathan. Yes, he wanted to help people, to be of service, but he also knew that it would give him the opportunity to further test his blood transfusion techniques, he couldn’t have realised the sheer cost that decision would make.

Serving three years in France as a Medical Officer and field surgeon, he admitted himself that it wasn’t uncommon for him to aid repelling an attack on the hospital during the night, which was the reason he was then taught how to use a gun, and even upon coming home, he still carried one with him. We also see the flashback of him trying to help a badly injured soldier, where they’re under attack and had been ordered to fall back, but Jonathan refuses, telling the other doctor that he’s not going anywhere until he knows his patient will live, or at least have a fighting chance.

In the same flashback, the other doctor asks “Now what?!?” seeing as the onslaught is imminent, and Jonathan pulls out his gun stating: “We fight. Killing is a hell of a lot easier than healing.” Though later admits to himself that it never got easy, once again proving how much it really did affect him and only further fuelled his childhood goal of helping people, regardless of who they were, where they came from or how much money they had.

Let’s not forget that he had just endured those three years of war only to go home to another one, returning to London, only to be attacked in the street, left for dead, wake up in a mass grave alone as an Ekon, blinded by thirst drained his own sister, was hunted, attacked, thrown into a new job as head surgeon, tended to patients inside and outside the hospital, ran errands for people all over London on foot, had to deal with the Spanish Flu, discover the vampire epidemic, be hunted by his own unintentionally turned sister who taunted their mother further breaking her mind, then had to kill his sister, had to investigate the source of the vampire epidemic, find a cure, then fight a literal God........................... all within a few weeks of returning home. He literally went from one war into another, where he was forced to basically lead and fight that war on his own.

I think this is why I love writing his pacifist route most, because despite all of this, the war, the events of Vampyr, that version of him refuses to give in and become the monster that folk keep telling him he is. Yes, he’s dangerous, incredibly so, but he uses his wits first. Just look at his fight against McCullum, he tried so hard to reason with him but he’s given no choice but to fight him, once the hunter is beaten, pacifist Jonathan offers him his hand to help him stand to his feet and simply walks away sparing him, once again proving that he’s not just some kind of heartless monster.

I just..... sorry, just me gushing over Jonathan as always. xD

PSD credit

[karereiko]

This time it’s the God of life, blood, restructuring, helping couples and all who signed bad pacts and the best deratizer and desatir of the underworld - Zagreus.

So as you can guess I spend a lot time playing Hades and fell in love with it. That’s why no surprise I really wanted to felt some characters from it. I wanted to try a different way of felting chibi characters this time too, more complex when it comes to face and in the end I decided to give him a better hands.

As I mentioned, my first chibis were mostly Pitanui plushes inspired, but since I felted Riku and since I managed to make quite nice face for Mieu, I wanted to try this kind of style.

Zagreus took me a lot time since I tried to figure out what kind of proportions I want him to have, so I spend a lot in making layers, build arms and legs more. His hair (21 cones to felt down with right side and order) and laurel leaves (20 of them) took me quite some time. When I have started this project I was mostly worried about Cerberus skulls but in the end those weren’t so much problem. The worst nightmare was to felt head together with rest of the body, the head ended quite heavy and didn’t want to hold still even after long felting time.

Since I began with the size of ball I used in my previous works, then added cheeks, nose, build up hair, made body to be proportional with such head - Zagreus ended around 17 cm big.

It’s been around year since I started felting. On one of the photos you can see Sorey, my first felted chibi ever made. I just thought it’s nice to see both of them together like this. Surely previous Pitanui style takes faster to do, still I love how detailed is the new one.

Guess what? Of course Thanatos it’s on the way, finally after making two other felting figures which I will post soon. I’ve just started to felt him and probably will take me a while, mostly his clothes details since I kinda finished the head today. Zagreus doesn’t hold that Ambrosia for nothing :P (thought if I could change anything in my Zagreus I would place ambrosia in other hand because there are a lot other details on his right side with red came, skulls and all. Better symmetry it would have been XD ) 

ps. Somehow the official nandroid of Zagreus ended too angry for me and for how we see him in game, that’s why mine has this smile with hint of gentle worry he often shows to those who he cares about. 

[ouat-the-hell]

Hi! I am a HUGE Captain Swan fan! What are the main reasons why you love Captain Swan/Hook?

Hello, anon!

Well, I fell in love with Captain Swan at first sight to be honest with you. When the group discovered Hook under that pile of bodies and Emma and Killian looked at each other, I just felt the chemistry straight away. And as we saw more of them, each of their interactions made me ship them a little bit more. I love how similar they are on some points (kindred spirits alert!), I love how they healed each other, I love how they made each other grow and how they always fought for each other. I love that Killian tore down Emma's walls, which allowed her to truly love again and how Emma helped him find his way back to the good man he was deep down. I love everything about them, really! And to this day, they're still my OTP even though I'm a quite big shipper and I have tons of other ships.

And about Killian more specifically, I love that he is a complex character with lots of layers and that, even though he doesn't always make the right choices, he always ends up owning his mistakes and trying to set things right because he's a man of honour. I love his sass and his innuendos but also his more gentle, caring and loving side. I love his development throughout the show and I think he had the best redemption arc of all! And let's be honest, I also totally fell for his good looks :p

So here you go, anon! These are the main reasons, I guess, or at least those that come to me from the top of my head. But the truth is, I could probably dissert about that subject for hours if I gave it more time and thoughts xD (For example, there is also a lot to be said about how these two characters ended up being so lovable and having so much chemistry because they were played by amazing actors such as Jen and Colin!) Anyway, thank you very much for your question! :)

[isolated-bug]

Hello! I love your talks about Arcane. Your words and thoughts always make me realize so much more about the story. Would it be ok if you talked about the scene where Silco talks to Vi outside where she used to grow up, What do you think he meant when says that ‘jinx is so much more than he ever imagined and that he ‘freed her candidly’ the tone seemed more soft and his word choice seemed very calculated. Why do you think he thought it was necessary to say those words to Vi right then? (His tone was hard for me to read there)

Then Silco has his whole rage fit after the sign falls and Vi and Caitlyn escape. I know he was furious but I’m not sure if there are any other emotions layered that I’m not picking up in that scene. I wanted to know your general thoughts on it if you have any.

-♠️

OOOOOOOOO i LOVE me some Silco analysis!! Lets Go! <3

Also thank you for the kind words!! holy cow >.< im not worthy!! This is gunna be a long one so im posting a read below to just... save peoples scrolling XD

Silco is such a *wonderfully* complex character and he has so much behind everything he does; or at least this is how i feel. I briefly touched on this topic in a different post about how i feel Silco did not plan on killing Vi (i think it was that post.. maybe it was a Silco/Jinx father/daughter analysis.. i cant recall now >.< ) So, man, ok.. where to start... So in that scene.. hmm no ok wait. Lets back it up ok, Silco/Jinx leading up to that scene is really important to set the narrative for explanation so forgive me for reiterating events here but: - Jinx "defended" the shimmer shipment - Silco argued in Jinxs defense against Sevika - He talked with Jinx and advised she distract herself with her gadgetry - Jinx decided to bomb a bunch of enforcers and get the gem - Silco learns of the attack; we dont see who from but we know its NOT Marcus because he comes to confront Silco separately later - Silco dad-style yells at Jinx but forgives cuz gem - Silco argues with Marcus, again in Jinxs defense - Jinx medicates Silco and he tells her to focus on weaponizing the gem - Jinx has her freak out from the magic acting up - Jinx goes to the arcade (ironically while Vi and Cait are eating at Jerichos) - Silco gives one of Jinx's bombs to Marcus to use as evidence against the Firelights - Jinx expresses to Silco she cant handle the magic trauma - Silco takes Jinx out to the water and has a heart to heart - Jinx successfully works on the gem - Silco learns Vi is alive - Silco sends out an order to all of his staff to "grab" the two girls that kicked Sevika's ass - Bartender Thieram/Chuck tells Jinx about the order - Jinx is suspicious that she wasnt included or made aware of the order - Jinx confronts Sevika in Silcos office - Silco confronts Marcus in Marcus' home - And then finally Silco gets word from the shimmer addicts of Vi's location and goes there himself *whew* that was a lot.. but its important. Notice how in all of this, every time Silco has an interaction *about* Jinx he is totally on her side? Their relationship is super solid at this point and it seems like, at least to SOME extent, Silco is aware of the state of Jinx's mind. Given how open these two are with each other and how they relax and show their true vulnerable selves to each other, i would guess Jinx has had fits around Silco as results of botched missions or other trauma triggers. We also see how casually Jinx talks to her apparitions both when alone and with others which makes me feel like she does this around Silco a lot too without receiving any judgement etc.

So i want to point out something very specific here. While Silco did do basically an all-hands-on-deck type of order among his goons to look for Vi and Cait, he went HIMSELF to the location as soon as he learned exactly where she was. He did not look for Sevika to go with him either. He wanted to be the one to handle this himself. This tells me that, while he is willing to use all resources available to him for this task, it is a personal task and not a business one. This also helps clearly define exactly how he perceives Jinx. She is not "just business" or "just a lieutenant". This is why we see his tone and mannerisms change so drastically between how he talks to Singed and Sevika vs how he talks to/about Jinx.

I think that, for Silco, this was a VERY personal matter. All he had likely heard from Sevika was that Vi was looking for Jinx. Silco went all hands on deck because of the threat of someone taking his daughter away.

So, Silco is used to using intimidation and power to get his way. When he confronts Vi, note that he is unarmed BUT he is definitely utilizing that same body language to express his power and influence to build an intimidating presence. He has two goons with him who are armed but not in any stance to fight. Weapons are slung on their shoulders etc.

I feel that Silco had one objective here. Get Vi to give up on Jinx. His tactic for this was two parts. First to make Vi feel too weak to take on the fight and second to make her think that Jinx wouldnt be interested in leaving regardless. I also believe he did not want to kill Vi. This is important. He knows what Vi means to Jinx. He would not risk word of him killing her get around to Jinx.

Thus his speech. "Vanders prodigy, i regretted that we never had the opportunity to speak" He is trying to impose his intelligence over her and seem un-phased by her return. I think he is being honest here and had actually originally planned to try and turn her to his side. He knew from Sevika that Vi was wanting to fight Piltover when the topic was brought up in the Last Drop. He also heard stories from his younger underlings that he had keep eyes on Vanders kids that she was a good fighter. He then seems genuinely offended by the question "what have you done with my sister?" Remember that Silco does not see himself as a destructive or bad person. Most of the people in the undercity support him and he himself sees the bad parts of what he does as "the base violence necessary for change".

So when Silco responds with "I've freed her. Candidly, I thought you were the prize of your secondhand family." We see an interesting and subtle shift in his expression to Vi. When talking about Jinx, there is some life and passion in his expression and tone. Then he looks around for a moment and when he stares back at Vi his expression is icy and devoid of any emotion aside from.. boredom maybe; his tone changes to match. I think Silco means what he said about freeing Jinx. He has helped free her from a lot of her insecurities, he does not restrict her movements or actions or try to snuff out her violent interests, and he protects her from consequences from the law. In his mind, he has freed her of anything that could be holding her back from reaching her true potential. But the second part, while i *do* think he had intended to flip Vi before the warehouse fight, i think he actually means this as the setup for an insult. He searched for those words for a moment. They were calculated. He wanted to hurt Vi with what he says next.

"but... Jinx... Ah~ she is more than i ever imagined." While Silco says these words he is, once again, more expressive. Even leaning his head back and taking his eyes off Vi to visualize his daughter, and his words are so soft.

Silco knows that Vi is a sensitive topic for Jinx even years after the event. A huuuge part of me feels like this is sorta... parental vindication. I thought you were great, but then i saw your sister. I believe Silco wants to hurt Vi with his insult as a small penance for what Jinx has endured emotionally. Silco values power and would assume most others do as well. So telling Vi she is weaker than the girl she abandoned would be a fabulous insult in his world. Because, to be clear, Silco *does* think that Vi abandoned Jinx. He only had Jinx's word to go off of with this and there would have been ZERO info about Vi looking for Jinx after the bomb since Marcus had captured her. Silco truly believes Vi abandoned a crying Powder to be killed by, well, himself.

So i think he is trying to shove it in Vi's face that she discarded someone with so much potential. 'You left her and made the wrong choice.' and twist that knife in til it hurts.

I like how Vi responds to this with "im gunna find her and erase whatever fucked up delusions you put in her head"

So Vi heard those few sentences and clung onto "i freed her" and "she is more than i imagined" and interpreted those as Silco maybe drugging her with Shimmer, manipulated her, or whatever else to make Jinx into this version of herself. Then Vi say she is FIRST going to target Silcos criminal empire and Silco replies with that same bored tone suggesting he feels completely in control and once again exuding power to intimidate Vi. "You dont know your limits, girl. Its what got Vander killed. What drove your sister away. And its why im here right now." again, doubling down on the whole effort to make her feel like this is an imposible task and her sister wouldnt want to return to her anyway. So then stuff happens and the rage fit and i do think there is a lot mixed in here. He is, of course, mad that he got bested by a child but more than that its Vanders Prodigy. So for Silco this has getting defeated by the ghosts of his past written all over it. Plus, he didnt successfully manipulate Vi to giving up on Jinx so there is also still the risk to his daughter leaving him. His effort to intimidate wasnt working. And finally he lost her. He doesnt seem like a man who takes loosing very well. And with her maybe 30 feet away, he lost her. One of the people he raises up and hits on the head during this fit is one of his body guards. Likely annoyed that they didnt have the foresight to see that risk or that they didnt pursue Vi during the chaos. He also stomps violently on the shimmer addict informant that told them of Vi's location. We never see Silco get this emotional. Never. I think he is honestly panicing that right at the final stages of seeing his fight for the Nation of Zaun, everything is falling apart. Vi is back, Jinx is struggling with the weapon, Marcus is turning on him, etc. But the way he responds to all the other bad news is exasperation... the way he responds to the threat to his daughter from his former betrayers prodigy is visceral rage.. i think it definitely sets the tone for how important this matter is to him. I also really like the symbolism of him standing in the center wreckage of the Eye of Zaun. Like his empire is shattering around him. Idk, i feel like it really reflects where he is at right there.

So anyhow, to put it simply, i think this was a personal issue to him, not a business issue. He definitely is a mad dad looking down the person who abandoned his daughter and caused so much shit in her head for him to deal with. And the possibility of Jinx leaving him for his betrayer's prodigy is something he is *very* worried about.

oof im really good at long.... o.o sorry >.<

[marshmallowprotection]

That discussion 'bout whether it's Suit or Unknown during V's route is very interesting. I'm pretty sure Cheritz wanted it to be Unknown at first, since this was before any talk about Ray's route, but it certainly does not make sense in the context of the story now lol

It basically comes back to the whole problem with: 'are Another Story and Casual/Deep stories connected?', which, honestly, is just another issue with continuity in mysmes universe... Either way, you have to fill in the blanks yourself, since the canon does not do that for us. Before the existence of Ray's route, it was definitely Unknown. You can look up old fanarts and fics before the release of Ray's route, and people absolutely perceived him as Unknown. He had the same manner of speech as him, he uses the same chatroom username and his voice acting is different from the way Suit talks. But with the release of Ray's route, it created this inconsistency we have now. It does not make sense for it to be Unknown, cause now Suit came into the picture, but it is also quite confusing since (at least in my eyes) he acts way different from Suit. So you have to fill in the blanks yourself. I believe that's partially why some people came to believe that Suit and Unknown are the same person... It's confusing when details like that are changing so drastically. This is not the first time that happened as well: if you try to write up a list of continuity inconsistencies in the overall story, it's going to be long one.

In my opinion, you can go both ways with this. Whatever fits your story better. It is an inconsistency in the writing and you can shape it whatever way you want! Whenever I write something about V's route, I use Unknown, but I certainly have to change up a few things in canon for it to work. Considering what we have now, it makes much more sense for it to be Suit, that's for sure. And I REALLY love how you explained his motivations during those events! But it definitely wasn't like that from the beginning... Being an oldy in the fandom is fun, cause you can remember those things changing quite clearly xD

I think the twins and Rika/V suffered from those inconsistencies the most for sure

Honestly, I don't know, either. That's why I said that it's really up to the player to decide if they feel like it's Unknown or Suit Saeran. I've just got in my head that it won't make sense to me otherwise if I'm not able to piece together everything in a way that makes sense to me personally. I'm a stickler for universe details, and we know that Cheritz can forget things and erase things very easily without any regard to past information. I've been here so long that I've seen so much change in regards to every character, especially Saeran as he grew from a mysterious person into something much much more layered and complex.

I always imagined the bits with “Unknown” in V were meant to be a big part of foreshadowing, and that's because I started thinking about that so much harder after Ray Route came out and I started to note similarities. Well, I felt like they were similarities. With Cheritz record on facts, you're right, it could very well be the implication of Unknown. I like to make things make sense in my head and Cheritz really makes us work for the information that we want to flesh out in the stories we create.

With no context for Suit, you’ll never know it’s him. See, I explain away the difference by saying that because Suit Saeran emerges differently due to the events in V Route, it changes how he reacts to things somewhat. That makes more sense to me! But, that’s because I write connect AS and CS/DP routes and if I don’t do that, I’ll lose my mind over here. Even though, it’s more likely that we should view them as alternate universes to each other and they’re not meant to be something that interlock. 

inconsistencies are everywhere. We, the fans, have to cry to make our own theories and assumptions with the information we have on hand, and then we have to change that and adapt after they say “hehe, actually, this is what really happened.”

[probably-haven]

Hello!! After seeing what you wrote about xiaoven fics I went to see what things you usually write and omg, your archon Venti headcanons????? I am absolutely in love. So if it isn't annoying, could you talk about xiaoven or Venti or Xiao or whatever ship or character you like? I don't care what you are going to say, I just want to know more about your thoughts ^^

I- is this... bestie, this is essentially a free ramble pass- kerujsgheskdfug. Trust me when I say that in no way is this, and in no way will it ever be annoying in the slightest- i literally- lets just say rambling off thoughts is kind of my specialty, especially when provided a topic to branch off of because otherwise I'm just- really indecisive about it so- iujskdh yeah- 100% definitely down to talk about Venti, Xiao, and/or Xiaoven XD. Also, yes- it may have been awhile since i last posted one(cuz again, indecisive about which direction to take part 5), but the Archon War Era Venti headcanons are still without a doubt my favorite posts I've made. It's just such an interesting topic with such endless potential that so few people actually think about or consider or even realize is there, so i always just get really psyched whenever i see someone interact with them lol.

.... this ended up being a bit of a mess: warning in advance

Anyway! onto the actual content!

- You see the thing about Xiaoven is that there's a lot of different ways that it could end up working out, and just personally my favorite way of portraying Xiaoven in my mind is as an unlabeled relationship because if anyone in genshin would give off that vibe its these two. And a number of other reasons.

- Firstly, I heavily headcanon Venti as being an aroace polyplatonic or perhaps heavily demiromantic. However, regardless of this I just don't think that Venti is really the kind of person to worry about how he should label his feelings, thinking it's silly to try to put them in one box or the other, especially with feelings and emotions being as fluid as they are in general. Plus it fits his whole God of Freedom vibe. I just- dont think he's the biggest fan of labels or social categorization in general.

- And secondly on the hand of Xiao... his defense mechanisms are very much ingrained in his personality. It's probably hard enough for him to not go into fight or flight(the answer is fight) at the slightest affection at first, at the slightest feeling of vulnerability. Even further down the line, with his fierce dedication to Liyue, I cant help but get the vibe that the moment he recognized that he was falling for Venti he would begin avoiding him, not only to avoid distraction from his duty, but to avoid corrupting him or losing him in general like he has with like basically every other person he gets close with(even believing that the cycle had repeated once more when he first heard of Morax's death)... now imagine Venti tryna slap a label on their relationship and tell me Xiao would have a positive reaction.

- The thing with Xiaoven.... honestly, i feel like theres more ways that it can go wrong than it can go right, but if they do manage to make their relationship work out, it's just simply beautiful in all terms of the word.

- Lets talk about killing. - During the Archon War, both were forced to kill a large number of people and gods alike- Venti out of a need to remain alive to protect Mondstadt, it's freedom, and the nameless bard's legacy by extent- and Xiao out of servitude to the god that was once his master

..... actually- break here- ive talked a lot about Venti on this blog but I havent actually spoken about Xiao all that much- so i should probably do that a bit first... do note though that my characterization of Xiao is pretty flexible actually- this is just- the possible characterization of him that i tend to favor as being the most- uh- "realistically complex"

-

Theres a line I saw this one time in a certain story: "He is a trained weapon. That's what he is, was, and always will be. You cannot change that so stop trying." And i just- think its a really interesting concept- that applies pretty well to Xiao now that i actually think about it. - the concept behind it is this: After spending more than a vast majority of his life killing or otherwise in battle, it's become a part of who he is, a normalcy that after centuries and centuries would be near impossible to get rid of or reverse, and even if it was possible, with his karmic debt constantly eating away at him its unlikely he has enough time left for that to happen. - it sounds like a cruel thing to say about him- but in context it's actually pretty layered and i think about it a lot. It's not as much a "he's a killer lol, that his whole personality" its more of a "The centuries of trauma he experienced have conditioned him into a constantly alert and battle ready mindset while also shaping his dehumanizing inferior-in-worth-but-superior-in-capability view of himself that would have likely been necessary to get through those time, and at this point he's been under that conditioning for long enough that it's essentially ingrained itself in his personality."

- the main idea is- it's a part of who he is, that needs to be accepted as who he is because its not something that he can just up and change. It's not all he is of course but his constant battle mode, as though always waiting to be ambushed or to be granted a new target to eradicate.

a couple character story quotes:

-"His past of service under the evil god had rid Xiao of his innocence and gentleness. All that remained within him was the means to kill and the weight of his sins. The only way he could be of service to mortals was in combat." -"Xiao does not feel any hatred. Having lived for over two thousand years, no single karmic debt constitutes anything more than a fleeting memory. No grudge can last a thousand years; nor is any debt so great that it cannot be paid off in this time. Xiao has spent many long years alone. But his battles have never been in vain." -"where did Xiao have to return to? He was merely leaving the battlefield." -"since Xiao wages a constant war against dark forces powerful enough to devour Liyue in its entirety, any bystanders who witness him in the heat of battle are likely to end up as collateral damage." -"The war he fights can never be won, and will never come to an end." -"Because ultimately, the one with whom Xiao wrestles is himself."

i feel like at some point this very nearly did consume his whole personality, almost turning him into nothing more than a being of slaughter under Morax's control, devoid of any "humanity" at all, consumed and corrupted by his karmic debt like his fellow yakshas before him. - until he experienced a moment of clarity- a song in the wind, the peaceful melody of a dihua flute. - and pulled back from the border of something he wouldnt have been able to return from, there a was a shift in his mind- a concept grown unfamiliar enough with time that it took him a great time to identify what it was; a curiosity. Something that there was no place for on the battlefield, something that by all means should have been completely useless to Xiao, and yet he held onto that curiosity, slowly regaining over time, a sense of who he was and who he could choose to be with each song that the wind chose to carry towards him every once in a blue moon.

and eventually that curiousity turned to longing. Longing "for a day to come when he will wear the mask and dance — not to conquer demons, but to the tune of that flute amid a sea of flowers"

...... uh- heh- if you couldn’t tell already i have a tendency to make my characterizations/analyses of characters more serious that i probably should. 

to summarize: Xiao is constantly toeing the line between his ingrained nature and his humanity- almost as though still trying to decide how much of that humanity he deserves to have, how much he is allowed to have, and how much is safe to have.

^looking back after writing this, i think the best way to explain it is that this is the view that i keep in mind/the lense that i tend to most enjoy looking through and refering back to while examining and/or analyzing his character, actions, story, lines, and overall personality.

idk- i kinda got off track but i just think its a really interesting interpretation to think about because it has some really interesting implications ig- it’s not the full extent of how i view him of course, but i kinda got ahead of myself and its long enough as is so ill just elaborate as i go- Lol i actually have in progress playlists for both him and venti and just- vibes- i could ramble about the playlists alone for hours explaining everything... It’s probably a problem- uh- ill keep going now lol.

anyways! stepping off the angst path for a brief break! Brought to you by their lines in the snow: both waiting for it to get thick enough, Venti for the purpose of a snowball fight and Xiao for the purpose of a tasty and nutritious breakfast.

but its actually something of note that Xiao doesnt actually need to eat so anything he does eat is usually out of obligation or enjoyment- so like.... snow.... like i dont blame him, but of all things- an adeptus who refuses to eat basically anything but almond tofu looks at the freezing-cold-floor-water that yeeted itself from above and decided at some point- damn- that seems more edible than basically ever single actually edible thing ever.... im gonna eat it- like- im glad if eating snow makes him happy but- at the same time...

He probably convinces Venti to eat snow too though and Venti wouldnt even resist I mean he’s wind and has probably consumed worse things in his time so- 2 anemo cryptids with glowing tattoos sitting in Dragonspine monching snow in the dead of night is an amusing thought to me.

- kay, now back to more serious-toned thoughts

One of the things about the ship that i really like is the different contradicting parallels between them:

A lot of how i view Xiao’s character is someone formed largely by the things he cant control and who was forced to accept that accepted that and learned to thrive in it as much as he can.  Venti on the other hand is surrounded by things he cant control and is ever adapting to control as much as he can while embracing whatever he cant as being part of the unpredictability of the world, seeing beauty in it. 

both of them have lost people and do what they do to honor their memory: Xiao continues to do what the Yakshas once did And Venti chooses to do what his friend couldn’t

Xiao’s power coming from himself  and Venti’s from others And both seem to appear to use their power for their own gain while truly helping others behind the scenes

both have killed a lot of people during the archon war Xiao views it as another necessary event out of his control and Venti would likely view it as a tragedy he chose to enact himself

and this is where we meet out balance

Xiao- contrary to how i think a lot of people view him as thinking of himself as a monster- seems canonically to have accepted this as part of his duty, as long as those he killed are not mortals. I dont think he enjoys it no- but someone has to do it and he’s just accepted that its a part of his duty Venti on the other hand-

See the beauty of the ship- as someone with an angst-centric mind- is this- these are two of the most traumatized mfers in the game 

Xiao is by far the one who needs the most help and who can serve to benefit most from the ship- but he is nowhere near self aware enough to recognize that there’s anything wrong or unhealthy about his mindset in the slightest-

whereas you have the contrast with Venti who sorted through most of his trauma with the nameless bard alone during the archon war and while the result appears more healthy- is still really not- but he’s not self aware of that either because i mean- who’s going to tell him? nobody even knows. 

however- venti is aware enough to notice flaws in Xiao’s mindset and “Venti” enough to want to help them through it-

Xiao- while not aware enough to recognize the flaws in Venti’s mindset, can recognize where it contrasts with his own, and is blunt enough to point it out- and then it’s out there to be mulled over- 

they’re so similar and yet so different and a feel just conversing between the two of them, being in each others precense, just being exposed to two mindsets that are so very different could do both of them a whole lot of good.

GEEE THAT BIT OF RAMBLING HAD LITTLE TO NO DIRECTION AT ALL- LET ME-- LET ME MAKE THIS START MAKING SENSE- WITH... DYNAMICS OR SOMETHING

I don’t think Xiao needs to sleep really- and i dont think that sleeping would do anything except make him uneasy at first- he’d probably just get nightmares after all he’s been through- but with Venti he would soon learn that it doesn’t have to be that way, lulled into the first peaceful sleep he’s had in... as long as he can remember.

anywho back to not making sense cuz im fickle and i think most questions about ships are best displayed through character interactions so like- a possible exchange thats cliche but cliches exist for a reason

Xiao: Why do you try so hard to help me, it isn’t easy. I know that much Venti, with the most adoring expression: Because you’re worth it, obviously Xiao: But surely there are others more deserving of- Venti: No Xiao, everyone is just as deserving as the next person, you included Xiao: Then why me above others? Venti: ehe, cuz ur my warrior of course [O//////O oh shit, hes right] Xiao: My contract is with Morax alone [gay panic but in broody yaksha]

it’s kinda difficult cuz neither of them really address their feelings.  I mean Venti does but he does it very indirectly and its rare that he ever does it with like- genuine directness- even spilling his backstory was in the form of a song- and told in the third person- so a lot of their interactions would often have some deeper meaning, especially with Venti being the bard he is. 

I come up with a lot of- errant thoughts about Xiaoven- but this is making me realize that a true analysis of their ship is rather difficult because it just encompasses so many dynamics so its hard to settle on just one and not go rambling about who knows what bouncing from one end of the ship to the other-  Because you truly can and thats the beauty of it

within one moment you can be having a heartfelt conversation about the archon war the impact of lost friends and times past, and the next moment Venti is trying to forcefeed Xiao an apple while Xiao screams about disrespecting the adepti and its just- so lovely

so while they have picnics with nothing but apples, dandelion wine, and almond tofu they can sit down and talk about the dreams Xiao once devoured, and the dandelion wine and apple cider that the first Ragnvindir invented from the plants that never could have grown in Old Mond. The foods that tasted of familiarity, or of the grilled ticker fish Pervases always used to eat, foods that tasted of friends and frankly family that had since passed, glaze lilies and cecilias and qingxin flowers scattered in the surroundings and woven into Xiao’s neat braids and Venti’s now messy ones, rebraided by the steady and inexperienced hands of one unused to gentle action. 

and then of course Venti steals Xiao’s tofu once the mood becomes too grim and replaces it with a bottle of wine that Xiao refers to as “vile poison,” a remark that fatally wounds Venti as he collapses on the floor, proclaiming how he can only be healed by a Yaksha’s kiss. Xiao ignores this of course and simply takes back his tofu with a slight smile on his face, but as Venti persists he soundlessly places a kiss on his own palm before intertwining their fingers and pulling him back up from where he was dramatically sprawled on the floor, grumbling about how such action was “unbecoming of an archon.” A sign of affection only Xiao would ever know about. But Venti is literally wind and I hc his senses work differently anyways so he definitely knows- plus Xiao’s face is red as the blood of his enemies and the way he is pointedly not looking at Venti at all really speaks volumes anyways. 

 -Venti playing epic battle music whenever Xiao goes into fights in what looks like a ridiculously extra performance to anyone else but is actually doing wonders to keep Xiao’s karma at bay

-Venti preaches the practice of “kissing wounds better” and Xiao is unfamiliar with this medical treatment but views it as unnecessary regardless because adepti have accelerated healing, doesn’t mean he’s going to stop him though. 

-Messages whispered on the wind

-Venti’s 1000 year sleep- an accident, not a fun time for the yaksha, and not a fun time for Venti once he woke up. Venti is actually more afraid of restful sleep than Xiao is, hence the sleeping in trees thing, but when Xiao is there, he can sleep restfully with faith that Xiao wont let another millennia slip through his fingertips. 

- Xiao tends to make excuses when doing things that aren’t necessary to his duty, like in his birthday voice line “Have this, it’s a butterfly i made from leaves... Okay. Take it. It’s an adepti amulet -- it staves off evil” because at the current point in his progress it helps him to feel like he’s allowed to do these things. Not wanting to put him off from progress, Venti never comments on his excuse but never fails to whisper a quick reminder of how proud he is of how far Xiao had come.

- Xiao’s karma saddens Venti greatly- not only because of how it effects Xiao but also because its a reminder that as much as Venti tries to honor the memory of those he’s killed, there will always be those who resent him for it, and when he took the option of living away from them, he truly can’t blame them. - And when he gets too wrapped up in thoughts, whether around this topic or similar ones or otherwise, eventually, he’ll hear the sound of a flute on the wind. It’s not divine by any means, but as his own wind connects him to the source, he gets the sentiment all the same. “What impact does one individual’s remaining wrath have on the present. You have done much to help the living in the present” the unspoken idea that Xiao has included himself in that statement, because now, with Venti’s help he’s beginning to learn just how to experience living for himself. 

- Venti’s form and Xiao’s mask are off limit topics though because if either mentions it the other will counter with the opposite and the mood will turn immediately bitter at the idea that both know that what they’re doing is destructive but neither are willing to change

- Venti who has different tells for negative feelings than most people because as much as he likes to pretend it is- this form isnt his, and Xiao who is able to identify those

- many fanfics and headcanons have Venti recognizing when Xiao is uncomfortable and getting him out of those situations. I see that and I love it but i raise you: - Venti taking Xiao to Mondstadt, careful that he doesn’t get to the point that he’s uncomfortable. And nothing goes wrong exactly, but Xiao notices the the way Venti’s cape is blowing in the wind, the way he’s holding his weight, barely on his feet so much as floating on the wind, connected with the ground only for the sake of appearance, all the while he looks just as happy go lucky as ever. And without a word, he grabs his hand and teleports them both out of Mondstadt.  - turns out it was just a slight thing that reminded him of the archon war (cuz i will die on the hill of him having more tragic backstory than just Decarabian), and he of course gives a sincere if not flustered thanks to Xiao, because he’s really not used to people noticing. 

- Venti trying to vent sneakily through fictional stories and Xiao is just like “Didn’t that basically happen to you” and Venti is just like “<_< shit”

- Venti once said affectionally that he wished he had met Xiao sooner and Xiao immediately and seriously shot it down by saying “If you had, I would have been forced to kill you” and both of them now stay up at night wondering who would have won that fight, not sure which result would have hurt more. (because honestly I have no idea who would win in that fight and that terrifies me- I like to think it would have been one of those legends that end with “and the fight persists to this day” or something along those lines)

- “How long have you been together?” “Adepti have no need for-” “1000+ years T^T how dare you deny our love” “O///O our...? ...useless”

- its disney- let me explain- i have this- i have this headcanon inspired by watching too many animatics- - so venti has a human form that isnt his- which he would have had to get used to moving in- and he’s a bard- - uh- anyway- as a third degree black belt in mixed martial arts, i can speak as an authority on this(not really an authority since i havent gone since quarantine but lets pretend). We have a thing referred to as the big three(most things do), and those things are martial arts, gymnastics, and dance. The idea is that they reflect really well off of each other and the best in any one category are good in all three. Timing, balance, form, discipline, technique, hand-eye coordination, grace, ease of motion, they all play a part- anyway-

- Venti taking Xiao’s prowess in martial arts and acrobatics and teaching him how to dance, and as someone who’s extremely skilled in the first two, the third comes easy to him, almost naturally. And it’s delicate and beautiful and lovely and it isn’t hurting anyone. And Venti points all these things out and more and despite how much Xiao insists that he feels ridiculous he truly does enjoy it and it goes a long way towards helping him form more healthy views of himself and his worth.  - Verr Goldett walked in on him once and made a joke about performing at the inn. unfortunately Venti was there and agreed on Xiao’s behalf before he could protest and- and it wasn’t as bad as Xiao thought it would be... he still wouldn’t do it again though without reason, but with good enough reasoning he could probably be convinced. 

- anyways point is he likes dancing to Venti’s songs and i just think that’s really cute - just picture the idea that all the animatics you see actually have the potential to be canon- ugh

- venti tries holding something out of Xiao’s reach since he’s taller and Xiao just fucking teleports 

- both need their space but when they dont, all they have to do is speak the other’s name and they’ll be there.

- and because i just had to.... love languages

- lets start with Xiao- i don’t think he’d view acts of service or quailty time as a love language tbh, and he blunt but really bad with words so affirmation is out, leaving gift giving and physical touch. However, he seems to view most material things as meaningless so- - Xiao who’s love language is in his fleeting touches, something he’s only recently grown comfortable with because of Venti, and now is giving back, which he knows he doesn’t have to do, but that he want’s to, though he’ll still continue to make excuses for each one. “you were shivering” “The inn is high up, you could have fallen..... I said what I said, you’d question an adeptus?”

- and as easy as it is to say words of affirmation for Venti- he does that for everyone- i want to say his is actually acts of service - its the acts of service that let him see just how much Xiao has progressed afterall, from teaching him to dance, to playing another song on the flute, to supplying him with the almond tofu he seems to enjoy so much. Every little thing he does helps Xiao to grow and he couldn’t be happier about that. 

-

- of course most of my headcanons for the ship do take place latter into the relationship because- y’know the less serious unhealthy vibes allow for greater range of thought, but i do still love to think about the serious implications so i kinda hopped back and forth. So sorry about how messy it is btw, i kinda- got carried away- it kinda got some kind of structure near the end tho so- maybe it’s okay. anyway- back to... lol something, we’ll see where thought forests lead. 

[ulfrsmal]

My girl Aelswith for the character meme ask!

Thank you for asking! I love Aelswith so these got a bit long! XD

My NOTP for them:

I don't think I have a NOTP for her tbh ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

My BROTP for them:

Aelswith & Eadith! I loved them in season 5, I know Aelswith was used mostly for comic relief throughout the season but it still felt like her, however declawed she was compared to the previous seasons. I think Eadith was a good counter-balance :-)

My OTP for them:

Aelswith/Alfred!! They are absolutely adorable together, I know it started as a political wedding but the way they fell in love sounds ADORABLE, and I love how they supported one another through thick and thin :')

My second choice pairing for them:

Aelswith/Uhtred, by virtue of these two being the only ones I really ship her romantically with...

My fluffy pairing for them:

If we mean Fluff, Aelswith/Alfred all the way!!

If we mean Gen, Aelswith & Edward. I know the obvious choice here is Aethelflaed, but Edward's moodiness means that his relationship with his mom has WAY MORE ups and downs, which I find intersting and worth exploring!

My angsty pairing for them:

I mean both Aelswith/Alfred and Aelswith/Uhtred are angsty... and for the same exact reason: Alfred's death and no i am not feeling predictable or anything hahahahaha...

My favorite poly ship for them: 

Aelswith/Alfred/Uhtred is the obvious choice. Each pair here has a different dynamic that I find interesting, so putting the three together just adds a new layer of complexity >:3

My weirdest pairing for them:

This comes entirely from the books, so please bear with me:

In the first couple books there's a character Eanflaed who was a sex worker trying to marry Leofric, and who (when Alfred's family flee to the marshes) becomes a lady-in-waiting to Aelswith (or a companion lady, I am unsure about terminology).

Here's the kick: Aelswith likes Eanflaed very much but doesn't know anything about her former profession. I enjoy the idea of a F/F ship and I think that "forcing" Aelswith to confront some of the biases she has could be really interesting from a character development perspective :D

[theocanread]

THE CONFERENCE OF THE BIRDS- MISS PEREGRINE’S HOME FOR PECULIAR CHILDREN

I finished it…. I finished the book. Spoilers for all of it XD

GRRR GAY PEOPLE. And now another segment about Enoch!

He has been such a polite young man this entire book! He’s all “I believe in you Jacob!” But he says it in his own way. Which if I remember correctly was something like “I knew you weren’t completely useless, Jacob!”

And Jacob brought Enoch to the conference specifically, which means he respects Enoch as a person and friend a lot. XOXO and Enoch is just tired and hungry all the time. And very invested emotionally in what’s going on around them. Like when they were discussing the possibility of Caul coming back he was very part of the conversation. He was also scared, which is valid. Unless he was scared in the Bentham’s secret office scene. (My brain is jumbled from all the information.)

Anywayssss he comforts Hugh when he’s freaking out. Which at first I was like “aww! He’s getting soft!” And then I remembered him comforting the little girl in the bathtub in book 2 or 3. He’s always been soft. And it specifically says when everyone is trying to cheer up Fiona, Enoch is the first person to make her laugh :) that’s so cute. ALSO WHEN THEY FOUND OUT THE WIGHTS HAD FIONA, ENOCH CALLED HER “FEE” WHICH IS SO SO SO CUTE. Listen I’m all for romance, but platonic friendships genuinely engulf my heart.

Also, Jacob appreciating Horace is my everything. I can’t do it justice without giving the excerpt. It mad eke so happy. Page 276, “Horace who was wearing a cravat into battle. Horace, who had stayed up all the previous night repairing the rest of the peculiar sheep’s wool sweaters, which many of us were now wearing as a protective layer under our clothes despite the warm day. When this was over, I was going to tell him just how much I love him.” AHH HORACE DESERVES THE WORLD, AND JACOB SEES THIS.

Ok onto the elephant in the room. I believe when Fiona “died” I threatened Ransom Rigg’s safety. I take that back. YAYY FIONA IS ALIVEEEE. I love her. And I missed her. And Hugh’s determination has been beautiful characterization. This whole book is full of his strength and his pain and I had a lot of fun reading about it. This book would be perfect, if only Noor and Jacob weren’t flirting….. I just- I want them to be friends. And I want Emma and Jacob to have a complex friendship that they’re trying to figure out the boundaries of. They’re both hurt and I don’t think they really should be together. But Noor and Jacob feels like a big massive no. I am not interested in this at all.

I was worried that thing where mute characters suddenly gain the ability to speak by some miracle of emotion. But that didn’t happen to Fiona :) she can stay mute and be a functioning and important member of the team, because mute people are functioning people and I like her representation. I think she’s probably actually nonverbal. (I think it’s canon she’s nonverbal because of trauma. But I think aside from her PTSD she’s probably also autistic. Not just because she doesn’t talk, she gives the vibes.

I wrote this like 3 days ago at this point. I started the last book. I am angry at stupid horny Jacob doing stupid shit and ruining everything. I loved him, and then he fell for Noor. I love Noor, but this plot point is not doing it for me. My brain is tired. I want more content, BUT JACOB IS SO STUPID ITS INSUFFERABLE. I thought he learned to get help from his friends when he’s gonna do something. But it’s just him and Noor and they lead a Nazi right to the fucking holy grail! I am mush and lead. And I can’t type anymore. Good day to you, Peculiars.

[blushnik]

I love love your works and posts. Always looking forward to more content from you. Anyways my question is that in Punisher season 2 really trashed billy. What do you think about it. Personally I Hate Krista and Madani. Do you think billy and frank would have eventually started a relationship if billy hadn't been outed for betrayal.

*SOBBING HAPPY NOISES* Lemme just- uh, lemme calm down, this was so much praise I didn't expect to see when opening the inbox 😭🙏💙💙💙💙💙💙

Okay, now to your question *breathing exercises initiated*

First, I just wanna say that I kinda pushed the entire season 2 out of my mind, especially THAT part (y'all know what I'm talking about, I ain't gonna say it out loud) cause it just really hurts but xD I think I can handle it for this one occasion.

Season 2 really went ahead and said: Let's just punish Billy Russo for 13 episodes straight, yeah? Cause the show's name is PUNISHER. And he's PUNISHER's nemesis, right? So we PUNISH him, that makes sense, right? *clown mask here* And people will totally cheer when we finally get rid of him cause he's BAD and deserved to be PUNISHED, RIGHT? *clown levels intensify*

Lemme just point out that Billy Russo DID get his punishment when Frank introduced him, quite intimately, to a mirror. He suffered consequences of it during his coma in his dreams and after with memory loss and all conditions that came with it. And that'd be okay to have at the start but NOT FOR THIRTEEN FKING EPISODES.

You can't beat up a character that much, for that long, and then expect us to be cheering when he meets the shittiest end you could possibly think of. Not to even mention the monumental waste of potential in that story.

Remembering what he did and being told what he did are two VERY different things. If he doesn't remember shit then ofc it doesn't make sense to him how could he ever betray Frank like that. For all he knows, everyone just turned against HIM and made up this lie, his best friends and people he cared about going after him for – in Billy's eyes – no reason. Forget Maria and kids and Rawlins, just the fact my best friend, the only person I ever truly felt connected to and trusted and cared about ground my face against a broken mirror would be A LOT to process.

I seriously expected Billy to remember what he's done somewhere in the middle but somehow the writers thought new characters nobody cares about and an overly complex plot is a better way to go? That letting Billy be just a confused screaming crying mess for the entirety of season 2 while ten meaningless subplots get resolved so he can die right after will somehow work?

Look, I get he was supposed to lose everything he had in season 1, that being not only his wealth and company and good looks (he's still hot shut up and those feeble scars, bitch, what was that, Shadow and Bone did a better job at doing accurate scars) but also his self-control, his control over his emotions, composure, his ability to keep his cool, smooth-talking, etc.

But you can't let him be the victim and then expect the audience to not empathize with him or feel sorry for him and to NOT be okay when he dies right after it seems he finally found some peace, happiness, and love (I hate Krista too but shit, he was so happy with those stupid flowers, Ben sure knew what he was doing when he gave those blue flowers to Alina right before everything turned to shit).

Granted, he did shitty things in season 1 and season 2 too but the difference is this;

In season 1, those were his conscious choices. He never was a victim even in his own story. He knew he stepped on other people in order to get himself higher, he decided when it comes down to it, better someone else than him. He decided that after building himself up, no price was too great to pay just to make sure he was never hitting the bottom again and he had no problem with doing it because he's incapable of compassion and 'even though he loves Frank more than anything or anyone, Billy loves himself just a bit more' – Ben Barnes' words, not mine.

But in season 2, he doesn't know about any of that. He does feel like a victim because from his POV, everyone is simply attacking and somebody close to him hurt him for things he can't believe he did because at that point, he believed he would NEVER be capable of doing such things. And when he does something shitty – it's because he feels attacked, he feels like he needs to protect himself and that he's pushed towards it.

Pretty fking hard to see him as a villain, at least for me -.-

It's almost like the writers were too scared to explore that emotional turmoil and impact it would have on him and how it'd change his character if he remembered. Which is SUCH a shame it hurts. Ben Barnes has put so much nuance and depth into Billy's character, he had dimensions and so many layers so just imagine what it would be to have all of that go through some serious angst and explore his relationship with Frank further.

But no.

Instead, we get this imitation of angst where Billy Russo becomes a punching bag and we're supposed to go OOOH HE STILL EVIL BITCH when he darest to punch back.

And don't get me started on the worst character kill-off I've ever seen. Just no. I am not even sharing my opinions on this cause it's too much to think about.

So there you have it, season 2 is trash in my opinion, they really did Billy so dirty while throwing in subplots and characters that were absolutely unnecessary to have. It could totally be just about Frank and Billy trying to come to some closure (violent or not) and maybe Dinah sprinkled in cause she got a lot of beef with Billy too.

Now just to quickly answer the other question, would they have started the relationship eventually if Billy wasn't outed for betrayal?

Marvel and the Mouse are cowards so ofc not in the canon, but in my humble hcs opinion, ofc YES. Frank's the only one Billy feels a connection with and vice versa. And while it's easier for Frank to care for other people than it is for Billy (since, unlike Billy, Frank is capable of compassion), nobody gets him and accepts him the way Billy does. I like to think of that quote from the Darkling for this:

"I've seen what you truly are and I've never turned away."

That's Billy @ Frank. Together with the reasons, I listed in the previous ask where I pointed out how they complement each other ^^

PS: I just wanna say I actually love Dinah but it may be because of my hcs. She was really getting on my nerves at the beginning and then I just made up stuff in my head that made me really fond of her, like Dinah dating Karen Page and being the good bro for Frank and Billy.

Thank you for the reading if you made it this far, THANK YOU for the kind words and keep invading my inbox if you like 🥰💙💙

[zhoufeis]

Yay! The newbie (me) has finished 10 korean dramas

....... and here are my ratings.

- Ratings for: W - Two Worlds | Extraordinary You | Bring it on, ghost! | Hotel del Luna | The Tale of Nok-du | Run On | Rookie Historian Goo Hae-ryung | Romance is a Bonus Book | Radio Romance | A Love So Beautiful

- Also mentioned: Memories of the Alhambra | My Country - The New Age | Do Do Sol Sol La La Sol | Signal | Mr. Queen | Tale of the Nine Tailed | Goblin | My First First Love | Moon Lovers | The Crowned Clown

Let’s rate from worst to best:

________________________

10) Romance is a Bonus Book. Rating: 2,1 / 5 stars - skip it.

- I kept seeing this show on my dash and since my first kdrama watch was W Two Worlds with the wonderful Lee Jong-suk, I decided to give it a chance.

- But hell, no one warned me how bad it actually is. I’m not talking about the acting (the cast is actually quite solid), but I’m referring to... the plot (or lack thereof), the love story (let’s rather call it one-sided obsession) and the wasted potential. Let’s start with the set-up. A company producing books, a single mother who needs a job, her childhood best friend who works for the company. Yeah, it’s not precisely complex or inventive, but it’s something to work with. Create nice dynamics at the working place, have some yearning between the two leads, give them heartwarming moments and a confession of how they’ve always been in love with each other. There’s just one problem: she really never, ever had any romantic feelings for her childhood best friend. She keeps calling him a brother and insists on him being her closest friend (which seems a stretch since she lied to him for a year about her separation from her husband and kept sort of creeping up into his house to eat and shower there without letting him know). Anyway, I could oversee this (even though I hate the trope of childhood best friends becoming lovers in adult life just because one is a man and the other a woman) if AT LEAST we actually get to see her falling for him slowly within the show. But we just.... don’t. He confesses his love to her - as she is actually starting to see someone else, and let me tell you, she actually seemed to be into the second lead -, then promises her not to push his feelings onto her... but that’s exactly what he does (I guess I don’t need to mention I ended up not being his biggest fan), and she ends up falling for him for unknown reasons. Eh. Okay. I started rooting for the second leads halfway into the show. Hae-rin & Eun-ho as well as Seo-joo & Dan-i appeared to me as the much more shippable pairings. I might have actually cried for Hae-rin & Eun-ho at some point of the show, but well... Moving on to... everything else. I enjoyed some scenes in the company, but not enough that I could tell you any right now because there wasn’t anything very memorable. The show basically thrives in some random scenes usually involving one of the two leads rather than in scenes with the two of them. That random author’s suicide has stuck with me as well as the letters that song hae-rin has wrote to our male lead over the years. The talk about fears between eun-ho and that author has stuck with me too, but other than that... there’s just nothing really happening. I was patiently waiting for a plot to come but nothing ever came. It just feels like a bunch of really uninteresting subplots put into one show. I don’t wanna judge it too harshly, but one of the other modern day dramas I will discuss further down this list also simply works with a bunch of subplots coming together - and it’s wonderfully executed (it’s ‘Run On’, for those of you who are wondering!)

SUMMARY

- Favorite character:

- Positive: nice friendship between women (dan-i & hae-rin); delivery of lee jong-suk, jeong eu-gene & park gyu-young; one strong scene involving a life lesson every few eps

- Negative: no main plot, dull subplots... nothing happens, very cheesy at some points, the protagonizing couple is quite problematic and unshippable, their chemistry is not strong enough to oversee that; i really don’t know why people like this show.

_____________

9) Radio Romance. Rating: 3,2 / 5 stars - it’s cute.

- Radio Romance is the show on this list that drives me into conflict with myself. Because some things about this show are very strong; others (many) very, very weak. I guess the main problem is that the show’s set-up mostly shouldn’t be taken too seriously, but it deals with some heavy topics that need to be taken seriously. And unlike quality japanese animes or some quality chinese drama that usually achieve to make you realize what can be taken as a joke and what can not, Radio Romance is sort of incapable of keeping that balance. You gotta figure it for yourself.

- While offering a quite enjoyable cast and some quite different personalities within the show, there is no one particularly standing out. As you will see as we go further down on this list, this is not my only Kim So-hyun drama, it was also not my first, and I can promise you that it won’t be my last. I simply adore this actress, she’s enjoyable to watch. I don’t think I’ll ever grow tired of her, which is why I checked out the show in the first place. Compared to her other characters though, Song Geu-rim is kind and nice and all, but not too memorable. She’s portraying a nice girl next door here with a dream to become a good radio script writer. And if not even her character stands out, as expected, none of the others will either. As for the plot... We don’t really have one, I suppose. If you count the plot making the radio show, I suppose then episode 3 or 4 is the last with actual development. I was hoping for more conflicts and plot twists involving Soo-ho’s backstory - and we got them, but very, very, very late on the show. Basically, getting through the first 7 eps felt very easy to me, due to the change of locations and relationship growth, and getting through the last 3 as well. Although the last was such a cheesy ending, you have no idea. The middle part suffered from a lack of plot and character development as well as it suffered from a focus on the love triangle - which I totally could have lived without. Like, istg, what was the POINT of this love triangle? Soo-ho and Geu-rim had to deal with enough things already, bringing in yet another obstacle through the tercero and putting the focus onto this love triangle was just soooo cliché. And don’t even get me started on how they also went with the problematic love triangle tropes rather than to at least make it somewhat adorable or funny. It was also boring. I kept pausing the episodes there and didn’t keep watching for days. It was only at the end of episode 13 that things finally got interesting again when we finally got to learn more about Soo-ho’s backstory. From then on, I was able to end the show within 2 days. So, no, the backstory was not the thing that drives me into conflict though. What drives me into conflict is how such a quite flat story was able to portray a very good, very realistic case of depression and PTSD. Like wow. This must have been one of the few shows, in which we have a canonically diagnosed character who does not fall into stereotypes and in which his depression isn’t used as a mere plot device to get the ship together and cure him by that. His depression is underlying at all times, sometimes more, sometimes less. He is told to get treatment (”no treatment, no medication.”), he has moments in which his depression mentally and physically restrains him from acting. It’s a very layered, realistic depiction and I adored every single bit of it. Meanwhile, the character isn’t defined by his depression nevertheless - there’s more to Soo-ho then just the depression, and after all, he was an outstanding character (to correct what I said before because I was lying xD). So... for all the lack of plot and development and predictable storytelling, the depiction of depression and the peacefulness of the protagonizing couple save that show.

SUMMARY

- Favorite character:

- Negative: unnecessary love triangles with unnecessary clichés; barely any plot; sheer boredom in the middle of the show; takes itself and its tropes way too seriously.

- Positive: complex character who is suffering from depression and PTSD; layered, realistic depiction of depression; adorable couple that transmits peacefulness.

________________________

8) Rookie Historian Goo Hae-ryung. Rating: 3,5 / 5 stars - nice, but it is no must-watch.

- I feel genuinely bad for putting this right after Radio Romance and Romance is a Bonus Book, because Rookie Historian was, simply put, muuuuuuuuch better. I got invested in the characters and their backstories. The story is quite more complex in retrospect than it seemed at first, but the show’s issue is that this is rather less apparent in more than the first quarter of the show. I really don’t even recall what happened in those first few episodes because it is rather unimportant for the rest of the show, with minor exceptions. The story truly starts picking up around episode 9 and has a strong run until around episode 15. The last quarter of the show then is wayyyyy too fast-moving, too many things happening and we barely spend time on things I then wished to spend more time on. Unfortunately, despite having a good set-up and a quite fine cast, I don’t think I’ll remember anything in particular about this show in a year. It’s a nice watch, even though I sometimes really had to motivate myself to keep watching in the first eps, but it hasn’t lingered in my memory after I finished it.

SUMMARY

- Favorite character:

- Positive: rather lots of plot; positive female relationships; feminism; shin se-kyung; leading couple as well as the second leading couple, even though romance is not at the core of the show; nice messages about morality and truth.

- Negative: the first few eps are really.... slow-moving. To the point that I’d recommend putting the first 8 eps into 2-3 eps and giving more space in the end. Especially the last 4 eps of the show are way too fast-moving. Furthermore, there’s some plotholes. My biggest issue though is the glorification of europe's christianity during the 18th and 19th century. I was not expecting that in a korean drama but it seemed utterly wrong in my eyes, specifically because the show used it to promote that chrisitianity promotes equality of all races and genders. Not to be a bitch, but europe’s christian beliefs have never stopped europeans from discriminating women and non-white people, not then and not now.

- My general impression of the show is quite positive, but I’m not sure I’d willingly watch it again since knowing all the plot twists and storylines actually is enough to be watched once with that show. An experience that I haven’t made with the other kdramas that are higher ranked on this list.

____________________

7) A Love So Beautiful. Rating: 3,5 / 5 stars - if you really don’t want to think at all and just watch a light, easy to follow show, that is your pick. However, NOT recommended for first-time kdrama watchers - it gives you a totally wrong impression of what kdramas are actually capable of achieving.

- I’d like to point out that this show has surprised me in a good way - but there’s things that need to be pointed out here, so let me make three paragraphs: the first will talk about my impression of the first 16 eps; the second will talk about the last 8 eps; and the last will talk about how this show was cute, but could have been incredible, but didn’t use its potential correctly.

- Episodes 1-16: Look, the thing about those eps is very easy to point out: it’s not quality and it is never pretending to be (unlike romance is a bonus book, which pretends to be some smart, adult quality show but is just trash). Those eps cannot be taken totally serious. You have to go in there knowing exactly what is awaiting you. I started it because when I saw the trailer, I immediately realized all the tropes that Extraordinary You (higher ranked, you will see later) was making fun of. What you see is exactly what you get: Clichéd characters, clichéd love story, average acting, average directing, simple dialogue, clichéd love triangle, predictable developments - a simple romcom put into a tv show format. It’s cliché over cliché over cliché put into a het high school love story. And you know what? After weeks of studying for and writing my uni exams, it was exactly what I needed. The show is so over the top with its clichés that it’s genuinely funny. The lightheartedness and the non-existing complexity just add to that. Basically, you could argue that it’s all so bad with its clichés, which is why it becomes hilarious. Unlike other kdramas, it has a straightforward plot: a girl is in love with a boy and wants to be with him. It’s as easy as that. The show clearly loves featuring every trope you could associate with het love stories, but honestly, it’s so light and breezy and such a fast watch (due to the fact that each ep is between 20-25 minutes), you will finish those first 16 episodes before you know you even started it (I made it in less than 2 days). I want to repeat here though, it’s not for someone who starts with kdramas and hasn’t watched other kdramas. It cannot be taken seriously - and you only cannot take it seriously when you have seen things like Extraordinary You or W or, I guess, a bunch of high school kdramas. But I’m telling you, this is the only Kdrama on this list that you can watch in the most stressful time of your life and it will make you feel better. It won’t make you cry, it will make you laugh, and the moment it is out of your sight, you will forget about it - at least, that’s the case about the first 16 eps. And then we get to...

- Episodes 17-24: guys, what have I gotten myself into? As these people finished high school and their problems actually also got more adult, I started to grow genuinely attached, specifically to the ship. When she got sick and he didn’t even know although he’s a DOCTOR? When she was sexually harassed and didn’t know how to talk to him about it because their relationship was filled with other problems? When he left for 3 years and later told her that he had hoped she’d follow him because she always has... and then she didn’t? When he said that everyone is under the impression that she is more dependent on him but that he is actually the one who cannot imagine a life without her? IT ALL HURT BADLY. Because 1) so many years passed in such a short amount of time on the show and it felt like someone was ripping my heart out. I got genuinely reminded of that stupid US movie “One Day” - and y’all know how that movie ended. And because 2) there was a very realistic notion in the adult relationship portrayed. Not only did it point out how differently relationships/friendships can develop once you outgrow your teenage years and start navigating your life by yourself, but the problems, the misunderstandings, the different perceptions of time, the different perceptions of how friendships and relationships are developing - I honestly could relate to it a lot, looking at it from a 24yo perspective because it is something I have been experiencing as well since I finished high school. You feel more lonely and tend to perceive some time as passing by quickly, other times, it feels like everything is going so slow. These last 8 eps completely differ from my perception that I had in the first 16 eps of the show, as the tone is much more serious and the things depicted realistic and relatable. I also sobbed a lot. I didn’t sob at all, ever, in the first 16 eps, but the last 8 were me crying a lot and feeling my heart hurt as the years passed by and these two just spent them apart.

- So, what do I criticize about this show? The show’s pacing. I genuinely loved the change of feeling between high school and adult life, between ridiculousness and seriousness, and I know the show wants to celebrate youth at the end of the day. But I honestly believe this show could have worked so much better if u cut the high school episodes down to 8 episodes and rather spend a few more eps exploring their young adult lives. It would have worked so much better because their young adult selves were genuinely relatable, as well as their problems. The growth within the characters, realizing that the way they acted as teenagers were often self-centred or that they didn’t think that much about the consequences or how other people felt was nicely done. The show had potential. The dialogues were bearable, the camera work had hints of something great. In other words, I believe that with more carefulness to directing and dialogue, the show could have genuinely been a quality romance drama. The potential was there, but it wasn’t used the way it should have been. In the last 8 eps, you simply get a whiff on what this show could have actually been. Because the realistic character and relationship writing was right there - and if it had been put together with awesome directing and better pacing, everything could have been incredible.

SUMMARY

Favorite character:

Negative: the show’s pacing; the waste of potential to be an actual quality romance.

Positive: the un-seriousness of the first 16 eps, which were just so clichéd that it all was hilarious, compared to the seriousness of problems and development depicted in the past 8 eps.

_____________________

6) Run On. Rating: 4,2 / 5 stars - recommend

- I’m gonna be honest here and tell you something about me you might have guessed by now: Modern-day shows with no sci-fi nor fantasy elements are not particularly my thing. I usually sort of hate-watch them. Romance is a Bonus Book, A Love So Beautiful and Radio Romance are all of such shows and while I was even capable watching two of them without ending up hating them, they’re far from being my fave. Objectively, they’re okay-ish shows, nothing to be considered quality tv according to my cultural studies though. Subjectively, they just suffer even more from the fact that I’m very keen on being critical of such shows. But what happens when I find a non-fantasy, non-scifi modern-day show that is actually... good? Run On is the answer. Run On has memorable characters, their funny, unique characteristics, and simple conflicts put into nice subplots that often talk real-life problems such as bullying or self-neglegance. At the end of the day, this show is a love poem. It’s a love poem to self-love, self-respect, to friendship, to character growth, to family bonds, to achieving your goals, to making new goals, to kindness, and to life itself. That’s really what it is. You will find yourself in, at least, one of the characters. You will see them struggle, fight, grow, become better, and at the end of the day, the most important thing is that you are capable of living with yourself. I personally got attached to all of the stories and I adored how nothing was ever done over the top. Everything was subtle, multiple subplots working together... to form stories of life. It’s more than just a simple “feelgood” show and less than a devastating tragedy, it truly shows you life and puts it into an aesthetic form, that never neglects its reality. Which leads me to something I should point out here: it’s creatively done. From the fact that Seon-gyeom is waiting for Mi-joo at the end of the track to the drawings of Young-hwa that have Dan-ah in them to Dan-ah realizing that people experience the same things differently due to the fact that experience itself is different to everyone to Mi-joo imagining movie plots with the people she surrounds herself with to Seon-gyeom starting to live with Young-hwa in a small flat rather than to live lonely in a big, fancy hotel room - the things the characters go through in this show are not only talked about, but they’re often expressed through art, in all its forms. And these characters, these dynamics, the art, the conflicts are all subtly but carefully put together into subplots that form the show and very nice messages. The most important take-away I had from this show is that the way we treat us and the people around us is the highest form of art. And the show is a love poem to that.

SUMMARY

- Favorite character:

- Positive: the cast (especically the core four), the characters (especially the core four); the wonderful messages about respect, kindness and self-love; the subplots working together, reflecting how life is also not just some simple chronological order of things but rather multiple experiences that we remember and that shape us; life is constant growth.

- Negative: i think the only thing i truly have to criticize is that you never really know what the plot even is. While I do enjoy how the subplots all work together, I would have wished for deeper inspections of some plots. And while it is easy just for some headcanons to come to mind, I still think the show could have incorporated more. Considering the treatment of art forms and how it takes a prominent role within the story (due to Young-hwa and Mi-joo, respectively), I also would have liked to have some cultural nods and references - and interpretations. I think the show used about 85% of its potential - and the potential was great, which is why the rating is still very good.

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5) Bring it on, ghost! Rating: 4,2 / 5 stars - recommend, especially good for people who want to have a focus on romance coupled with a supernatural plot and who want a happy ending

- While the story is pretty easy to follow, often seems to be predictable and familiar, the show still promotes nice messages about forgiveness and regret. The strong side of the show isn’t particularly that though - this show is entirely saved by the two leading actors. Kim So-hyun and Teacyeon portray two incredibly lovable characters you will see yourself drawn to. They furthermore have a chemistry that you just have to love and their bickering is just the best part of all. This is mixed with some tragic moments - in present time as well as in the past - and what you get is a romantic show with a bit of comedy, with a bit of tragedy, but with a very happy ending. If you exchanged the actors with two less skilled actors or two people who simply don’t have a lot of chemistry, this show simply wouldn’t work. Their performances are the shining light of this drama, mixed with some funny side characters that you get to enjoy as well. The reason why it ends up higher on the list than Run On - despite Run On probably having generally the better dialogue writing as well as better camera work and even more beautiful messages - is due to the sole work of the two leads who simply carry this show on their back and the fact that despite having some more or less necessary subplots, there is a main plot here that will take a faster, darker turn in the second half of the show. And I personally just enjoy having a main plot to hold onto as well as I always enjoy a bit of fantasy more than modern day real live shows. On top of that, add some devastating backstory and top-notch character development for Park Bong-pal, and a badass, slightly violent, sassy characterization of Kim Hyun-ji. This show will simply leave you with a huge smile on your face, despite being made for people who enjoy tragedy as well.

SUMMARY

- Favorite characters:

- Negative: subplots sometimes take the focus, a familiar story, stereotypical portrayal of ghosts (yes, ahre, i said it), no real plot twists (which can be a good thing, too, since the show rather simply unfolds each part of the story over the course of its run)

- Positive: the two leading actors, their incredibly shippable couple, a happy ending. If I was going to recommend a light-hearted, happy kdrama that has some tragic parts but ends happily and isn’t that hard to follow, I’ll recommend you this one.

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4) The Tale of Nok-du. Rating: 4,6 / 5 stars - strongly recommend.

- If you ever are in search for an unproblematic dummy as protagonist, watch this show. He’s a dummy you just have to love. You laugh about him, you laugh with him, you cry for him. He’s a puppy, you cry with him. And the best thing is, this puppy falls in love with a girl who can be quite rude and annoyed, but he always makes her smile and genuinely is attentive to her. The most frustrating thing about both of them is that each of them keeps a secret they cannot tell each other because they refuse to hurt each other - and this almost leads to tragedy. Better even, they’re portrayed by two very skillful actors. You’ll love them in the blink of an eye. And then there’s the cute second lead, portrayed by Kang Tae-oh. Yes, cute. Until he really isn’t. I’ve never seen an actor being able to turn around a character to 180° in no time. Some talent that is. And now let’s just say - the plot is nice. It is not the most complex one, but it is interesting to follow and you are always eager to find out new information to collect and put the pieces together. If you are searching for a show that is simply entertaining and nice to watch and featrures a great cast and nice characters and ranges from comedy to tragedy, this is your pick.

SUMMARY

- Favorite characters:

- Negative: the narrative change in the middle of the show that shifted the focus away from women to men (even though it made sense within the story, it was still a very sudden and harsh change, especially if you consider that these women were mostly slaughtered to death)

- Positive: CAST (specifically the three mains are just beyond amazing); an innocent, pure, absolutely adorable protagonizing couple that will steal your heart; feminism; male protagonist being a feminist who ends up working with badass women for his entire lifetime; directing; narration practices - this show is the one that draws the line between the ones i discussed above and the really great ones because it is the first on the list to be capable of telling a story by constantly keeping your nerves up while also not overstimulating the viewer with too much information at once. Only the other 3 shows which will follow now were able to do the same - and it’s what makes people watch or quit, and that’s why it’s so important: constant plot development, no unnecessary side plots, and handing your audience enough information to make them keep watching but not enough to guess the entire plot yet. The Tale of Nok-du was able to do exactly that and I honestly enjoyed the ride.

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3) W - Two Worlds. Rating: 4,8 / 5 stars - strongly recommend, must watch.

- I’d like to point out first that my top 3 are interchangeable. I sometimes tend to change my mind which one of the three I adore the most, and W is definitely in those top 3. Firstly, I’d like to let you know that W was my first Kdrama watch. And it blew me away. I was in awe with Lee Jong-suk, with Han Hyo-joo, with the narration of this drama, with the plot, with the direction, with the leading couple, the cast, THE DIALOGUE. Everything about this drama was excellently executed. The slow-moving narration in episode 1, the extra long scene of Chul holding the writer at gunpoint, the writer ‘becoming’ the killer (which he has always been anyway), the philosophy behind it, the creativity. I was blown away by literally everything about this drama and I believe it to be one of the strongest dramas ever made. Furthermore, what I also really adored, is that you don’t need to necessarily be into the couple in order to enjoy this show anyway because the plot takes the spotlight - but since the couple is always involved in the main plot, you get to enjoy plot, dialogue and couple at once. An interesting thing that I want to note here is that a few weeks after finishing the show, I stumbled upon reddits criticizing Lee Tae-hwan for his acting in general. I don’t know if he just perfectly suited the role of Chul’s bodyguard in W, but I highkey enjoyed watching him in this drama.

SUMMARY

- Favorite characters:

- Negative: I would have adored if Yeon-joo took a more prominent role in the resolution of the story (last 2 episodes) since the ‘hero arc’ went all to Chul there. And another negative aspect is that the show lives from very strong dialogues throughout all episodes, all incredible, all amazing and then - the very last scene. The last words spoken on the show, as a voice-over of Chul and Yeon-joo, are rather dull compared to the rest of the show.

- Positive: narration device, leaving out information to fill us in later and blowing our minds away (PEOPLE, I THOUGHT CHUL DIED), complex main characters, complex plot, no unnecessary subplots, no unnecessary romantic drama, no unnecessary cheesiness, DIALOGUE, direction, the cast in general*.

*I tried Memories of the Alhambra, as I found out that the same people who also made W were in charge of that drama, and I have to admit that I was intensely let down, specifically by the casting. Hyun Bin was alright-ish (not very memorable though), but Park Shin-hye was unbearable for me after episode 3. I stopped watching. If the plot was as interesting as the one of W though, I would have kept watching. But seeing as nothing really happened in those first 3 eps other than the lead killing his old best friend and playing video games that appear to turn into reality, I felt like I was wasting my time.

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2) Extraordinary You. Rating: 5 / 5 stars - strongly recommend for hopeless romantics, people who suffer from second lead syndrome and people who like getting into philosophical debates.

- Extraordinary You was the second kdrama I ever watched. And. And. And. And I almost gave it up after episode one. It seemed somewhat ridiculous to me, way too fast-moving. I would regret my entire life if I had given it up right there and then. Because PEOPLE, IT IS SO GOOD. Not only does it feature a very healthy main couple, it leaves you emotionally devastated because there’s a backstory that you only get to know in the second half of the show but which influences your entire perception of the first half - and jeez, by the time I reached half of the show, I was yelling and screaming and crying my eyes out. You ever want to see a love so deep that it transcends consciousness and universes? A love so deep that time and space become mere nothings? That’s what you get in this show. And one of the best parts is that the ‘’’’’actual’’’’’ lead (in the ancient story within the show, not the story of the show) aka Baek Kyung* does NOT get the girl. But that doesn’t mean you won’t fricking suffer with him. Jeez, I bawled my eyes out for him, too. But Haru/Dan-oh, guys, they’re.... everything. Oh and all of that is nicely mixed up in a strong, complex plot that leaves nothing unexplained. Not everything is explained through words - the show is high on symbolism rather than dialogue - but everything makes sense. And the ending, oh that stupid ending. As beautiful as heartbreaking. Since the plot is put into a philosophical perspective throughout the show, the show also raises questions about existence and being. Yes, I yelled when Heidegger was mentioned. So not only do you get to see a beautiful, heartbreaking love story; adorable, complex characters; time-and-space-transcending friendships, you also get to laugh, cry and think about your own existence and your own place in this world. This show is a delight.

SUMMARY

- Favorite character:

- Negative: you will cry and cry and cry and then laugh and then cry and cry and cry. It’s really not fun. Emotionally devastating. No, but for real... I wished we had a more complex depiction of the female characters that aren’t Dan-oh (specifically Ju-da, Sae-mi and Su-hyang), and a bit less focus on the guys therefore (I love them all but I thought the girls could have gotten some screen time of theirs while I would have accepted Jinmichae, Do-hwa and Nam-ju to get a bit less)

- Positive: Honestly? EVerything. Directing, casting, characterization, narration, love story, friendships, everything.

-  *Let me say something about Baek Kyung, portrayed by Lee Jae-wook. That character could have simply been an asshole. The set-up was there, the writer of the comic also made him that way. But Lee Jae-wook has portrayed this character with so much depth that it is impossible not to feel bad for him. His entire life stages (hahahaha, I’m so funny) are a tragic mess. The fact that he eventually realizes that who he is and who the writer made him are eventually indeed two different people after all - but that they both share being in love with Eun Dan-oh - is as important as it is devastating. Cause it makes you realize that he can finally move his life more freely with that knowledge - become a better person outside of the stages (only if given the chance by the writer though) - while also never finding a happy ending. Firstly, because happy endings don’t exist in their world anyway because endings - if happy or sad - are always endings to these characters’ existences and because it is glaringly obvious his happy ending would include having Dan-oh by his side also outside of the stages. That is denied to him and will always be denied to him. And as a viewer, you understand that and you want nothing else, but the fact that he doesn’t even appear in the new story, not getting a chance at a new life this time, just adds a tragic notion onto all of this that no one asked for. I’d like to thank Lee Jae-wook here for such an incredible portrayal. I started Do Do Sol Sol La La Sol because of him and, unfortunately, had stop watching after 2 episodes because Go A-ra is simply... a terrible actress. I can’t put it any other way. I’m looking forward to other dramas with him and the rest of the cast though. Extraordinary You definitely had a huge advantage already by having a quite young, but incredibly talented mass of actors and actresses.

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*drumroll*

1) Hotel del Luna. Rating: 5 / 5 stars - strongly recommend, must watch.

- It wasn’t thaaaat surprising to me that I would love this show. It was rather.... obvious that this would happen because a fantasy show set in modern day with the involvement of other time eras and a badass, broken, strong female lead is simply my taste. What I did not expect was this to become my favorite tv show of all time. I don’t even know where to start. I guess Jang Man-wol is a good starting point. Because I live for such characters. Characters like hers are precisely of my taste (I had similar people to her before - Ámbar Smith from Argentina’s Soy Luna or Melody Paz from Argentina’s Casi Ángeles - and also after her - Seo Dan-ah from Korea’s Run On), but Jang Man-wol takes the no.1 spot in all tv characters ever. She’s so layered, so complex, so well-written. She’s not predictable, but she’s also not ever surprising. She comes across as one of the most relatable tv characters you could ever see because she isn’t just one thing. She’s very contrary, she can be soft and loving or harsh and ruthless, sometimes all at the same time. She can be forgiving, she can be arrogant, self-hating, self-loving, lazy, passionate, she is quite literally everything. And while in the show’s set-up she is punished for hundreds of years when other, much more problematic people were allowed to leave this world sooner than her, the narrative wants you to feel sorry for her. You see her flaws, you see she’s anything but perfect but it won’t make you conclude that her punishment was ever deserved. The more you get into this show, the more you will ache. Because you know that there is only one possible ending to the show - for her to finally find peace. And that... that can only be achieved if she finally is allowed to leave this world. And it hurts and pains because, obviously, there is a love story. A love story that goes back to when she was a child 1,300 years ago. A love story that reunites her with the guy who saved her these 1,300 years ago and who now finds her again, someone who makes her care about her life again. As deeper as you go into the show, the more you will cry, the more you will suffer. And you will feel conflicted. You will want her to get her revenge while you will want to protect her. You will want her to finally be able to leave this world, but you won’t want her to leave Chan-sung. You will want her to actually care about her own fate while you will also want her to make the mistakes that worsen everything. It is a beautiful character put into a story that mixes fantasy, comedy, tragedy, soulmates, life, death, revenge, a stunning cinematography and strong dialogues into one. And what you get is the probably best show ever made.

SUMMARY

- Favorite character:

- Negative: There is really only one minor thing I’d criticize. While all the chars are rather complex and all subplots and character arcs work within the main plot frame and round up the entire story perfectly, there is one subplot I personally got a bit tired of because it is definitely the most unconnected one to the main plot - this concerns the romance arc of yu-na and hyun-joong. I wasn’t hating it, but I just didn’t need it for this story.

- Positive: This show has everything. I told you above already all the things I like. On top of that, I’d like to add that it has a beautiful found family story arc, promotes wonderful messages, has gotten itself the most excellent leading actress with IU who just beautifully portrays Jang Man-wol in all her depth. The show leaves you with your heart aching while there will be a smile on your face. Emotional devastation is just how this show works.

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- Kdrama I'm currently watching: The Crowned Clown

- Kdramas I plan on watching soon: My Country - The New Age (watched 2 eps so far) | Signal (watched 1 ep so far) | Mr. Queen | Tale of the Nine Tailed | Moon Lovers

- Kdramas I abandoned because I didn’t get into them / disliked them: My First First Love | Goblin | Do Do Sol Sol La La Sol | Memories of the Alhambra

- If you have any suggestions for me based on my likes and dislikes, send them to me. I’m open to everything :)