#{ depends if i even do this lbr }

[numiolaes]

i love that aemond felt Kinda Bad about killing lucerys but there is NO inclination he's sad about aegon sdlkfjghfskldg like okay love that you have a hierarchy

[you-are-constance]

this has been such a week i deserve a reward

[suzukiblu]

So, I was rereading Jason Goes Home and a thought struck me. Not a fic specific thought, a general omegaverse thought. Specifically for versions with Nesting as a focus (and may be inspired by me upgrading my bed situation).

Do you think that in a world where Nesting is common, there would be Nesting Pillows that are for structure? Like body-pillows or the back support with little arm pillows? I think there would also be seperate pillows designed to take scent better.

Like... IRL a squishmallow nest is fun but not very structurally supportive. Using blankets to be exactly the right shape to counter the shitty couch you're sleeping on ends up a bit hard.

Anyway, what Items are in a Nesting Boutique? Which ones can you find at Wal-Mart? Feel free to tag in anyone you think would have fun designing Omega Pillows.

oh, I definitely do think specific nesting pillows/blankets/curtains/general materials would be a thing, hah, whether structurally or materials-wise or just in terms of "I have decided These Ones(tm) are for nesting". I also think nesting pillows would be, like, a normal project to make in Home Ec in high school or in crafting classes and the like or just in your general hobbywork. Just WILD amounts of "free nesting pillow patterns" online or circling around local crochet/knitting/sewing groups and getting passed down from packmate to packmate or parent to child or things like that, and probably they'd run the gamut from squishmallow to sofa cushion to yoga block, depending on the omega's taste and also for use in different layers/supports of said nest.

Specifically in "Jason goes home" I had Jason's structural nesting habits be inspired by Catherine's because I think a lot of kids would naturally want to emulate their pack omega/omega parent's style of nesting, because that's what they grew up used to and so that's what feels most instinctively comfortable to them, and probably they'd make or seek out similar materials to those or even maybe inherit some of them FROM that pack omega/omega parent, depending. And alternately obviously, an abused or abandoned or orphaned kid might want to seek out DIFFERENT styles of nesting, or have issues about not having been TAUGHT a style of nesting.

( lbr probably somewhere in that AU, the first time Kon wanted to nest he had NO clue what he was doing, because I doubt Cadmus mentioned anything actually helpful beyond "omegas do it" and otherwise he just had, like, media examples and no EXPERIENCE of them. and probably Tim didn't get to be in a nest very often growing up, and Cass DEFINITELY never did, Bart would have zero experience with them whatsoever, and Cassie might find nests smothering because her mom was overbearing, and Cissie probably just DESPISES them because of HER mom's particular version of "overbearing", and Dick's probably used to small and quickly-assembled/quickly-broken-down impermanent ones, and and and--and I could go on for a minute, hah! )

[alittlebitofloveliness]

In defence of Steve Randle

Listen guys, Steve Randle gets a lot of hate in this fandom and as much as it pains me, it's valid. Everyone has their own interpretation of the source material, and fandom is supposed to be fun, so it is absolutely valid and ok to hate or love any character you want. You can hate Steve for many reasons or for no reason at all! This is fandom! That's ok! The story is for you interpret and love and play with and hate on to your hearts content. HOWEVER, to say that Steve Randle isn't an important character to the novel is simply not true, and to say that he hates Ponyboy requires ignoring or downplaying some pretty key moments of the book. This is especially true for those of you who love Dally but hate Steve, because Steve gets a lot of hate for being kind of a dickhead (which lbr, a lot of seventeen years old are, especially to their friend's little siblings) while Dally gets less for doing a lot worse (harassing Cherry, jumping kids, etc). This isn't to say that either character is better- they're both great, nuanced characters who have done bad things, but the fandoms attitudes towards them when they share a lot of characteristics is really telling. Even Ponyboy's narration about them is pretty similar- Pony doesn't particularly like Steve, and he was canonically scared of Dally, but they're both members of his gang and he doesn't hate either of them. You don't have to like Steve as a character, just like you don't have to like Dally or Darry or Tim Shepard or even Ponyboy, but he is important- and he doesn't hate Ponyboy, nor does Ponyboy hate him.

A really important moment in the book is when Ponyboy and Johnny defend Dally after he harasses Cherry and Marcia.

"Dally's okay," Johnny said defensively, and I nodded. You take up for your buddies, no matter what they do. When you're a gang, you stick up for the members. If you don't stickup for them, stick together, make like brothers, it isn't a gang any more. It's a pack. A snarling, distrustful, bickering pack like the Socs in their social clubs or the street gangs in New York or the wolves in the timber."

This line here is super important. Pony and Johnny were willing to defend Dally after he sexually harrassed Cherry and Marcia- soc girls who they clearly liked and were intimidated by- in the name of being a good friend, because that is what's important to them and their gang. If they're willing to do it in this context for Dally, you'd best believe they'd do the same for Steve, and him for them. Steve can and will rag on Ponyboy within the gang, but he'd never dream of bad mouthing him to anyone else. Dependability is important to the gang, and Steve would never publicly shit talk Pony, and vice verca. Regardless of their squabbles within the gang, at the end of the day they've got each others backs. They're buddies. We see evidence of this at the end of the book, when Pony grabs the bottle and threatens the socs with it.

"You really would have used that bottle, wouldn't you?" Two-Bit had been watching from the storedoorway. "Steve and me were backing you, but I guess we didn't need to. You'd have really cut them up, huh?"

The important thing here is that along with Two-bit, Steve was backing Ponyboy, no questions asked. Sure most of it boils down to Pony being a member of the gang and that deep rooted loyalty to one another, but the context for this scene is that Ponyboy was sitting on Steve's car waiting for Steve and Two to stop flirting with some girls. The three of them were hanging out- without Darry, without Sodapop. It's their school lunch break. We know Ponyboy has middle class friend's at school, or that he could've spent time in the school library. It was a deliberate choice to hang out with Two and Steve. He wasn't forced into it. Canonically, Steve and Ponyboy hang out. Never alone, but they're decent enough friends to hang out together in a group. Doesn't everyone have friends like that? I do. This isn't the only textual instance either where they hang out without the entire gang being present. Early on, Pony offhandedly mentions that sometimes Steve and Soda will buy him pop and teach him about cars if he hangs around the DX.

"I had walked down to the DX station to get a bottle of pop and to see Steve and Soda, because they'll always buy me a couple of bottles and let me help work on the cars."

He could've just said Soda's name here but he didn't. Steve buys Pony pepsi and teaches him about cars, even though he gets annoyed with him when Soda invites him to hang around with them too often. And honestly, who wouldn't? I'd be annoyed if my best friend always invited her little brother along with us, even if I liked the kid. Wouldn't you?

Now, we do need to address the elephant in the room. I'm talking of course, about this quote;

"I'd never tell Soda, because he really likes Steve a lot, but sometimes I can't stand Steve Randle. I mean it. Sometimes I hate him."

I feel like very often people forget the context this quote comes from, and so it's magnitude is blown way out of proportion. Ponyboy has just been jumped and then immediately scolded by his brother who constantly makes him feel foolish and unwanted. He's already scared, embarassed, and defensive and then Steve goes and makes him feel even more unwanted. Of course he wants to lash out. Of COURSE he feels like he hates Steve in that moment. I did even reading it. But Ponyboy doesn't truly hate Steve. This moment is PEAK fourteen year old having a rough night energy, it's not truly representative of Steve as a character or of Ponyboy's feelings towards him. In truth, Steve actually kind of likes Ponyboy and is at very least protective over him. This is evidence by the previous quotes, but also when Ponyboy comes back from Windrixville, and is worried about the state placing him in foster care;

"'No, [Ponyboy said] 'they ain't goin' to put us in a boys' home.' 'Don't worry about it,' Steve said, cocksure that he and Sodapop could handle anything that came up. 'They don't do things like that to heroes.'"

It's subtle, and not immediately obvious to the traumatized fourteen year old who is used to Steve's cocky nature, but this is both a reassurance and a very bold claim. Not only is Steve trying to look out for Ponyboy the way the rest of the gang models- by treating him like a kid, letting the 'adults' worry about grown up issues in a misguided attempt to protect Pony- he is also throwing in his lot to make sure nothing does happen. Based on this quote and the rest of Steve's characterization throughout the book its not hard to infer that Steve would fight tooth and nail to make sure Ponyboy stays safe with his family. Sure, part of it is gang loyalty, part of it is his devotion to soda, but part of it is because he and Ponyboy are buddies in their own right, no matter how much they fight. They are friends- and Steve is an incredibly important character for many reasons, but particularly to add depth to Pony's character, to the bond between the Curtis gang, and to highlight how the Curtis gang differs from the other gangs in Tulsa. Steve is just as much an outsider as the rest of the gang, and it's disingenuous to say otherwise no matter how much you may hate him as a character.

[boykingscourt]

what do you think it wouldve been like if john had stayed longer (unspecified) after 14.13 (not what you think the show wouldve done, but your own hcs)

hmm...

I'm going to ignore the show's stupid ass temporal paradox thing and just focus on the characters

I think a lot would depend on if john stays in the bunker or spends most of the time with mary in donna's cabin (rip au bobby but actually I don't give a shit about you)

if he spends more time with sam and dean, I think the first thing he's going to notice is something you already see him pick up on in lebanon: sam's change in agency and personality (very different from the sam he knows in 2003). I think it would give john whiplash observing this quiet, mild-mannered sam who often stammers and flinches at loud noises or sudden movements. aside from this sam clearly carrying a mountain of trauma that john couldn't begin to imagine if he tried, he realizes it's dean. dean's word is absolute, and if sam protests one of his decisions, he'll give up the fight at some point and defer to dean. john would feel conflicted finding himself suddenly missing all of those things about sam that drove him up a wall and ultimately led to his disowning sam what like two years ago in his timeline. it would probably leave john with a lot of questions: just what did happen between his sons for dean to have this kind of control over sam, and how did dean manage to out-patriarch john? I think seeing his own worst qualities amplified and reflected back at him through dean would make john quite uncomfortable and maybe it would even be enough to keep him away or keep him scarce

however, I think his absence would be (in dean's mind) more understandable and less sacrilegious than mary's because 1. this is the same shit john would pull when they were kids anyway 2. john could fall back on wanting to spend time with mary (viable excuse) and 3. he's a man and the original patriarch

I don't think it would be smooth sailing for john and mary either. both of them have had to live with the other dead (for john about twenty years at that point and for mary about two) and neither of them are the "version" that either of them lost. for mary, john is two decades older, and for john, though mary isn't much older than she was in 1983, she would probably feel like a different person to him. for one, she's not the refrigerated woman and perfect and pure symbol of wifeliness and motherhood that he's supposed to be getting revenge for, but she's a hunter. and john is a hunter too, who raised mary's children in the life she tried so hard to escape but also vowed never to repeat with her own kids. after a few rounds of "I missed you" sex at donna's cabin, the two might find they have irreconcilable differences

dean is maybe the biggest question mark for me, and aside from a lot of it depending on just how much time john spends in the bunker like I mentioned I think it also depends on how much time john spends in the show after 14x13. like dean has certainly usurped john as Patriarch, but how would it be with patriarch prototype back? dean in later seasons is in this funny middle ground where a part of him recognizes john's abuse and how it wasn't fair to him and sam (but mostly him lbr) while also having grown into something even worse than john. they'd probably "get along" because they're similar in personality, but if there were a battle of patriarchs for instance, (like one of spn's "moral dilemmas" that isn't very compelling and/or sending a bad message but does get the characters on opposite sides for a few episodes) something where john and dean find themselves disagreeing, I ultimately think dean would win. I mean dean literally stole john's family and assumed his role, and he has a long history of abusing, manipulating, and gaslighting people, mostly sam, in ways not even john is capable of

I was going to speak more on how he'd feel about cas and jack but I think I used too much brain power so I'll keep it short. he'd definitely be wary of them because they're "monsters," but he'd probably get used to the idea of them once he sees they're part of the family, for dean always a few rungs below, but family nonetheless. however, if john were to stay around long enough to lose mary again, that would be the end of his playing nice with jack and probably cas too

this is short but I also think this john would struggle with purpose because again the woman he's supposed to be getting revenge for is alive, yellow eyes is dead, and sam's horrible dark destiny has come and gone

anyway that's basically it! I personally would've loved more john (mostly because s14 just sucked ass and I would be up for basically anything) but as you alluded to with this ask the writers probably would've done the least compelling and least fleshed out thing imaginable so actually thinking more on it I wouldn't have wanted more john with the writing team they had in the show at that point. but that's also because the early seasons sam/dean/john dynamic is one of my favorite things about spn and the only writer still around in s14 who was at all familiar with it also happened to be andrew dabb

I would love to hear other people's thoughts about this ask and my answer in the tags or comments though (but you have to be suuuuper nice to me or I'll cry)

[samovine]

Unpopular opinion - but I think Supernatural didn't fully delve into Sam's demon blood 'addiction'. They never truly truly fleshed it out as a proper/real/ full-fledged addiction. Sure they showed him calling up Ruby a couple times asking for the blood but for the most part he seemed well adjusted. I mean the characters were a little too quick to characterize his dependence on the blood as EVILL without really even addressing it.

Because season 4 has a few snippets every few episodes to show that Sammy is drinking demon blood and it suddenly becomes a PROBLEM that's completely blown out of proportion when Dean finds out in The Rapture.

I'm with Sam there. He was removing demons out of people without hurting them. The pacifist in Sam, the one who truly wanted to do as much damage control as possible was finally doing something with his freaky powers.

And everyone and their MOTHER seem to conveniently forget in both seasons 4 and 5 that both Dean and Castiel played significant if not equally damning roles in ushering the 'apocalypse'. Dean was the first seal and Castiel let a severely jacked up Sam OUT of the sex?dungeon. Not to mention all of heaven's holy host ( which is why Castiel let sam out) were working towards the release of Lucifer 'the big fight' (for the showdown between Mikey and Luci) that was supposed to go down next season.

Poor angel baby sam did no wrong.

I mean what if he hadn't killed lilith and had just continued smoking demons out of people with his mind? We know that addiction in reality isn't as open and shut as Sam's case. Realistically he could have had multiple relapses (not just the one where Famine forced it on him). Lbr that wasn't a real relapse.

Big big character arc mistake that Spn did was not stretching out Sam's Demon-blood/psychic powers arc a little more. Or better yet, bring out a Demon-blood arc in the later seasons.

[thatstonedwriter]

˚₊‧🍄[ Hangin' with The Boys ]🍃˚₊‧

◉ Synopsis; how the Boys spend their time off (with you)

◉ CW; potential spoilers for seasons 1-3, substance use (and abuse), swearing

◉ A/n- aight my first piece for the Boys- went with something tame to ease myself into writing for this insane show- wtf am I doing

◉ feat; Butcher, Hughie, Frenchie, M.M, Kimiko

Moments of peace are few and far between when you're hunting and killing Supes. When you're not being thrown out windows and being threatened by the world's most powerful entities, free time with the Boys is definitely a special treat

The bastard he is, Butcher spends any free time he's got smoking, drinking, and antagonizing the others- just for a laugh. Butcher will always try to sneak off to a bar or some back room- but ever since you joined the crew, he's had a hard time shaking you off. Always following diligently- or maybe just to be an annoyance- Butcher is almost never free of you- or your attempts to get him to socialize. Forced proximity and a lot of patience were crucial to Butcher finally caving and allowing you to join him for a drink one day. At first, it’s quiet- not uncomfortably so, with the usual ruckus in the room over serving as odd but comforting background noise. Any conversation that does take place is likely started by Butcher insulting you. That goes for every other conversation that follows, too. You’re either a Butcher enabler or you help pull him back. Maybe it depends on the day- either way, your partnership comes at the expense of the others’ sanity. Pranks, insults, and drinks/cigs galore- the two of you go through the “recreational supplies” faster than Frenchie.

I really, really hope you like (or can at least tolerate) Billy Joel because that’s all Hughie wants to have playing in the background while the two of you talk. Of course, feel free to introduce new shit- he’s flexible (but lbr, this dude just wants Billy Joel). When you’re not being forced to listen to “We Didn’t Start the Fire” for the millionth time, the two of you are playing card games, sneaking off to arcades and movies, and even possibly going to visit Hughie’s dad or Annie. Whether you’re on the train, the couch, or (M.M forbid) laying on the disgusting floor, you and Hughie are damn-near always sharing earbuds to listen to music. Hughie would really enjoy just people watching with you. Seeing people live normal lives, happy and (relatively) safe- it makes him believe he could have that one day, ideally with his friends and family- that includes you. The playful/nerdy banter between you two is considered to be the most wholesome part of the crew.

Frenchie I wanna get high w you please- ahem- Yeah Frenchie likes to do a lot of drugs- but he won’t be offended if you decline. Usually, Kimiko and Frenchie come as a pair, so with you, they’re a happy trio! Together, you and Frenchie will request songs for Kimiko to play on the keyboard, the three of you will dance to whatever is playing on Kimiko’s iPod, you and Frenchie learn/practice Kimiko’s sign language, you and Kimiko entertain Frenchie’s high shenanigans (and pull him back when he goes too far)- basically any and everything you can do, you do together. Hope you have space in your brain for two more languages because alongside Kimiko’s SL, Serge would absolutely die if you learned any French- even you just learning the basics would melt his heart. Frenchie often encourages you and Kimiko to sneak out with him to go on “dates” (lowkey thruple coded) to small, hole-in-the-wall bars and restaurants. He’s for sure going to ask your opinions on chemistry or whatever the fuck while he’s making/studying bombs. He’s not miffed if you don’t know or can’t answer- often times he’s talking to himself anyways- but any feedback is always appreciated.

M.M would really appreciate a grounding presence in the crew- and that’s exactly what you helped provide. You helped balance the ratio of crazy to insane within the group, and for that, M.M is eternally grateful. Often times, while he’s cleaning/organizing equipment, you’ll keep him company. This often turns into M.M opening up about his family, OCD, concerns he has about the Boys, etc. He’s a firm believer in hard work, discipline and learning so you won’t just be standing around while you talk and listen- oh no, he’s showing you the way- the proper way- to clean the weapons, disinfect the counters, organize the shelves- hell, he’ll even ration out some supplies so he can teach you some first aid/sutures. It’ll probably be a while before you get through to M.M’s softer side, but it’s totally worth it to get there. M.M wants the best for his crew, and though it’s tough love, the rigorous lessons are all taught in hopes of you being able to protect yourself (and keep the hideout tidy).

Happy trio part 2! Nobody expected the quiet, intimidating Kimiko to enjoy music and art as much as she does. You and Frenchie are her biggest fans and supporters, and often show her new music to listen to- if you’re lucky, you can get some pirated versions of old cartoons to watch together. Kimiko loves dancing and listening to/playing music- and since you and Frenchie usually indulge her, that’s what you spend a lot of your time doing. The others call it goofing off- you three call it a healthy dose of fun. When Frenchie is out, Kimiko spends a lot of time teaching you her SL so that you can talk without Frenchie being the translator. Sure, typing on the phone is easier, but being able to have secret conversations with your friends is so much better, don’t you think? Talking shit about the others right in front of them is a treasured experience you, Kimiko and Frenchie share.

[aihoshiino]

Always love reading your Ai posts! I lost interest in OnK somewhere in the movie arc but I still keep up with your posts haha <3

Can I ask about the Secretly Ai characters you mentioned in the recent Aikane ask? Pls and ty professor 🙇‍♂️

I'M SO GLAD YOU ASKED!!! Sorry in advance that this is going to be majorly rambly lol this is one of those topics I have always sort of rolled around in my head purely as A Vibe and never had to rly articulate at length. but lbr you guys are here to read me post 50k word screeds about hoshino ai.....................

So when I talk about the Secretly Ai Characters in OnK, I'm talking about a little something I mentioned in an older ask, in which the story uses certain side characters and deliberately and obviously parallels them with Ai in ways that are intended to sort of, indirectly communicate things to us about her. Obviously they are still characters in their own right with their own individual role in the story separate from this - but those pointed similarities are very much intended to make you hear information about them and go "oh, so Ai must also..."

These characters are, imo, Yuki, Abiko and Mimi.

Of the three, Abiko is the most in-your-face and deliberate about it. Her colour palette is very similar to Ai's and the anime even adds a really explicit and clearly intentional parallel to one of Ai's most iconic frames from episode 1 - and this was so important, apparently, that it was basically the first thing we saw of her in the anime continuity when season 2 previews were being released.

Abiko's similarities to Ai are mostly about making the viewer understand their shared communication issues and how this impacts their social health - the way it contributes to isolation and a snowballing fear of trying to connect with other people.

I think there's also a vibe to Abiko being hyped up as being a "genius" and "supernaturally talented" in her field in a way that both obfuscates the obscene and frankly unhealthy amount of work she puts into meeting those expectations and heaps additional pressure on her to live up to the role of a "genius", without anyone else taking into account the fact that she's just a person doing her best. I, uh, probably don't need to elaborate on why that's particularly Aicore...

Yuki and Mimi are less clear cut, but for Yuki specifically, Akane's 'Aikane' performance cribs quite a lot from Yuki's persona on LoveNow in the same way it does from Ai herself. In fact, here's another one I just caught lol:

We can tell by these parallels that Yuki and Ai are similar sorts of people, then - or at the very least, similar sorts of performers. I think Mem puts it best here (DOESN'T SHE LOOK BALD HERE WITHOUT HER HORNS BTW) when she says it's "not lying, just exaggerating". This lines up with how Rie Takahashi (and, implicitly through her, Aka Akasaka) describe the difference between 'Ai Hoshino' and 'Ai of B-Komachi' - that the latter is not a wholly distinct fabrication but just a different side of the real Ai that comes out depending on the situation. In other words, an exaggeration.

As for Mimi, this one kind of speaks for itself I think LOL. She's definitely the most undercooked of the three... I think everyone in the fandom kind of like, implicitly agrees that Mimi and her brother were supposed to have larger roles in the narrative and that Akasaka just kind of dropped whatever he was setting up with them. So I'll start with the parallels that actually exist in-story and then I'll go onto what my current theory is for the role Mimi was supposed to play.

First off, I think it kind of speaks for itself that Mimi just... looks a lot like Ai? It's a bit less clear when she's in her big snuggly hoodie but when she has her hair loose for her Dig Deep cosplay, it's kind of uncanny.

and those eyes sure do look, uh. coughs. familiar.

Mimi's role in the industry is also very similar to Ai's. She's an indie VTuber seeing a lot of success without association with a major agency which neatly parallels B-Komachi's success as an underground group backed by a small agency managing to see major success even while fighting mainstream groups. A lot of Vtuber culture has its roots in idol culture and Miyako even points out in volume 3 that present day idol culture (in the world of OnK, anyway) is primarily online. So Mimi can be understood as a sort of 'modern day' Ai.

In fact, the more I went over Mimi's intro for this post, the more parallels I found...? Some of this is certainly accidental, but Mimi is managed by a family member just like Ai was and the reason she becomes a VTuber is because she has communication and mental health issues that make an 'ordinary' job difficult for her. She even dropped out of the education pipeline just like Ai did.

All this combined (the idea of those eyes being accidental is very hard for me to believe lol) makes me wonder if Mimi isn't supposed to read as a sort of 'failed' Ai or at least an exaggerated one. Both of them have (as mentioned above) communication and mental health issues that make living 'ordinary' life difficult for them and so they both commit themselves to strands of the entertainment industry that are maybe not necessarily good for them but because of their individual pathologies, they are uniquely suited to find success.

Heading into what is straightforwardly speculation territory (so take this with a huge glacier of salt), I actually wonder if Mimi was being set up to join B-Komachi as the catalyst for the Kana-Nino parallels and rather than Ruby being the Ai in that equation, Mimi would've been our Ai.

From what we're told about gen 1 in the Movie Arc, Nino was originally the group's center and basically the entire reason they got off the ground to begin with but she was ousted in both position and popularity when Ai joined and completely eclipsed her. Part of this was due to Ai's natural talent as an idol but it's also pointed out that Ai and Nino both had very similar personas as idols and were thus competing for the same fans.

This is exactly the conflict between Kana and Mimi set up in the lead in to Scandal...

... which is very much not the case for Ruby and Kana, which makes the attempts to force that parallel in the Movie Arc (as the manga later does) a little hamfisted.

As such, I really wonder if Mimi joining B-Komachi would've lead to a long-term rivalry between her and Kana that more explicitly paralleled the one between Ai and Nino. I really do feel like that would've been a much more natural way to play with echoing that dynamic than what we get between Kana and Ruby - I've criticized this before but it really is kind of insane that Ruby treats Mem and Kana like shit all during her BH era, never apologizes or has to make any amends for it and when Kana is finally able to express discontent over this, not only is this framed as being something she's doing for Ruby's sake but also something Kana is at fault for, all so Ruby can graciously forgive her. Insane!!!!

As for why it never came to fruition if that was indeed the plan... who knows! The manga following the Scandal arc is littered with so many nonstarters and dropped threads that I really could not tell you what was going on in Akasaka's brain. It could just be that he recognized he didn't have the time for it and decided it wasn't worth taking up page time for. But again, the inner machinations of his mind are inscrutable to me so it's anybody's guess, really.

[vigilskeep]

13 from that meme for keir/anders, 10 for minerva/zevran, 12 for minerva/alistair which isnt technically canon but youre lucky i didnt send worse ships we've discussed for minerva lbr, 20 for sol/lucanis, and 17 for arthur/josie please and thank u /kees kees

13. how do they comfort or reassure each other? both keir and anders are big declaration people and inexplicably find nonsense like “i would drown us in blood to keep you safe” reassuring to hear from each other. keir will hug or hold anders if he thinks he needs the comfort (though will grudgingly settling for squeezing his hand in public). anders is the best at reassuring keir & talking him out of a reaver/berserker frenzy after a fight ends, mostly by pinpointing what he always needs to hear: that it’s safe, that everyone’s safe

10. if they were picking up something special for their partner(s) in a market what would it be? what would their partner(s) get them? like any good assassin zevran knows his target’s weaknesses and he definitely knows about minerva’s sweet tooth, he will always come back with her favourites. minerva will get that useful thing he’s run out of that he hasn’t even mentioned to her he’s run out of yet

12. what are their love languages and how are they incorporated into the relationship? idk the traditional love languages but minerva/alistair love language is committing to the bit. when minerva trusts someone she relaxes enough to make jokes and to be slightly (ok more than slightly) mean instead of clean & polished diplomatic, and alistair loves to either pretend to be mortally wounded or to jump in on bitchy gossip depending on the target of her commentary. he’s very defensive of his position as the one she turns to to make that commentary jgsjsksk. also blood mages and tanks love to express love by bleeding for each other so they kind of compete on that

20. is there a sentimental object they associate with their partner(s)? what is it? was it a gift? for lucanis it’s for sure the wyvern tooth dagger, goes without saying. for sol... they’re not super sentimental about objects usually but maybe dark shard? it’s a very sexy sword from the game, sol always uses it or its appearance, and they picked it up in the ossuary when they were rescuing lucanis. so they do associate the two, if only to joke that the venatori always give me such nice things

17. what would they do/would they want for a wedding ceremony? would it be a large occasion, a simple one, or would they elope? is this a serious question. that’s josephine montilyet’s wedding. the word ‘large’ doesn’t begin to encompass it. arthur is not complaining, he does enjoy a bit of grandeur now and then, but more than that he enjoys how loudly and emphatically josephine wants to declare this wedding to the world when he thought it was something the world would never allow him to have. she won’t let anyone deny it!!

[nakylvr]

i recently just started hrt and just thinking about the girls getting excited about the changes with you!! like once your voice deepens, there's def a voice kink thrown in there somewhere (lara or dani lbr) but they're also just so excited and happy for you :(((

first of all congratulations!! im so happy for you!! its gonna be such a fun experience 🫶

sophia is the one who is the most invested in your changes in terms of she looks it up with you before you even start and she just gets so excited for you when you say you can start. if you're doing injections for testosterone and nervous she has no hesitation to offer to do it for you if you'll let her, and she is the best at it. when your voice starts cracking and you're around the kats she will be scolding any of them who try to make fun of it, even though you all know it's nothing serious, she doesn't care

manon is the type to throw a dumb (lovingly) party for you being able to start hrt. whether or not you want people there or to know she is still buying streamers and balloons fuck honestly she'd buy a cake and for what reason? she wants you to know how happy she is for you, and that's her response if you ask her. she'd lightly tease you when your voice starts cracking but if anyone else tries to she will shut that shit down so fast the kats are just silently nodding while getting scolded

daniela literally lights up with excitement when you tell her you're starting hrt. while she already calls you every pet name under the sun, most in spanish, it just amplifies when your voice starts getting deeper. she's definitely the one most likely to develop a voice kink over it and will make it known to you. while she's normally one of the members most likely to tease others it comes to a halting stop when it deals with you. she knows better than to make a joke about something you could possibly get upset about and if one of the kats do she will be scolding them which comes as a surprise to them and you no matter how many times you say it's fine

lara gets so excited for you that it's almost like she's happier than you honestly. she'd be the one to suggest you do voice logs every month to see how your voice changes and is so happy when you do it. she's probably already bought you clothes and such depending on how long you've been with her but she is 100% dragging you to every store possible to buy you new stuff, grabbing every item you look at for a little too long without hesitation, and won't let you even think about it being too expensive. she'll stand up for you at any time, and that doesn't change once you start hrt if people who aren't familiar with you start asking questions, depending on how you feel and want her to answer determines how she goes about it

megan literally jumps up and down while clapping when you tell her you're starting hrt, it's easy to see she's just as excited for you as you are. she's asking you every week how you feel and if you notice anything, and when your voice starts deepening it stirs something in her. yes, she would also be one to grow a voice kink solely because of your voice deepening, a surprise. if you're doing t injections do not ask her for help i'm sorry but she will fuck it up somehow and will feel so bad afterwards that she won't try to again. but that doesn't mean she won't sit there beside you to give you some reassurance

[marshmellowtea]

aaahhhh I love hearing your headcanons and your infodumping can you give me some headcanons for Chris please?? >.<

first of all thank you so much omg 😭💖 second of all admittedly i tend to struggle a lot with these more open ended/unthemed asks for headcanons as opposed to ones that are more focused HOWEVER i do love rambling about chris and i can never say no to someone wanting to hear more so lemme see what i can cook up here aghklasjf (under a cut cuz as per usual i rambled teehee <3)(also obligatory warning for mentions of abuse cuz unfortunately i can't shut up about how shit raymond and celia are LMAO)

choosing to believe this man can't drive. both cuz if i can't drive he's not allowed to be able to drive either LMAO and because i know england has less of a car dependency than america so it makes sense to me that he'd just never learn if he never needed to y'know. his focus is on theater anything that doesn't help him achieve his goals onstage is useless to him ghasldkfjds

and tbh even if there was a car dependency across the pond lbr celia and raymond wouldn't have taught chris to drive anyway cuz they hate him being independent </3 so that's also a factor here

this is inspired by his spanish accent in show but i feel like he can speak a little bit of spanish but uh. not very well lol. he thinks he's better at it than he is bless his heart

he sleeps with an embarrassing amount of pillows and blankets. embarrassing for him, anyway, cuz he doesn't like to admit he needs comfort lol but he does like to get cozy and make a little nest for himself :')

on a related note his bedroom is the only part of his apartment that feels like his. i've mentioned before that his parents largely pay for his living situation (until they get bored of not having him there to torment and force him back home......) so they're always sticking him in these boring, pre-furnished apartments that don't have any personality. his bedroom ends up being the only place he ends up sort of decorating any time he moves into a new place, mainly because all the personal stuff he does bring with him fits in there easily, and it's the only room he uses often enough to bother to make livable ;_;

needless to say he spends a lot of time in the theater lol. i think when the drama society starts getting closer to each other his friends get more comfortable dragging his ass back home though (or, just as likely, making him stay with them for the night, because again his living situation is either in a sad ass apartment that doesn't feel like him or living with his parents, and neither of those are ideal places for him to be staying. especially not his parents' place where it's outright dangerous for him to be there 😭)

tbh the drama society needs to drag his ass away from theater stuff for a lot of things lol he WILL get hyperfocused and forget to sleep, eat, go to the bathroom, stretch his legs, etc........part of the reason he's always so cranky is cuz he's just not taking care of himself the way he should be, and while the whole society is passionate about theater the rest of them don't let it absorb their lives quite the way chris does :')

for as much pain and stress as running the society causes him it also brings him so much joy. no really ahglkadfj he would be so unbelievably miserable doing anything else, being onstage is what he clings to even when everything is going wrong in his life, it's his lifeblood it's what keeps him going. no matter how much things go wrong onstage, it's still his dream to be doing this, and that's what makes it worth all the suffering he goes through ouugh

that being said though the man SORELY needs hobbies outside of theater ahgldkasjfs. poor guy overworks the fuck out of himself and sometimes he needs to be forcibly brought out of that headspace and made to do something that's actually relaxing, like reading a book or doing some art that's not onstage or going for a walk or something.

in speaking of art not done onstage, he's a writer! he's not good at it <3 there's something endearing about his works, though, even if they're clumsily handled and frequently cliche. i've mentioned before that i believe the spirit of christmas was written by him (which i do kinda hate the plot of that one but this headcanon has softened me on it a bit ahgldaskfj) and that kind of saccharine, weirdly paced, plot hole ridden story is kind of his bread and butter i feel lol

his trauma also frequently slips into the things he writes, though if you pointed that out to him he'd get confused and defensive :')

this is also something i've talked a bit about before but chris is deeply in denial about how fucked up his childhood was, and he thinks a lot of what he went through is normal and fine when it clearly wasn't. there are a few things he's self aware enough to know weren't okay, like for example i think he's been long disillusioned with his dad at this point (which is actually a fairly recent development in my headcanons lol but the more i look at raymond's intended role in the pilot (not the pilot) the more i think he hates his dead for Real) but a lot of it he's still making excuses for and trying to downplay so he doesn't have to deal with his trauma. arrgh

keeping in line with the general theme of repression in his character lol i think he does have a clingy, cuddly side that he sorely wants to avoid acknowledging and that he keeps buried deep down within him. however, while it's something he definitely does not let just anyone show, i think it has started come out a little with his friends as he's started to lower his defenses around them, especially when he's feeling sick or particularly down on himself. i also think poor eliie (robert's sister) got a LOT of this side of him to a frankly overbearing degree, as i kinda referenced in my headcanons about their relationship, since she just met the right conditions to create a perfect storm of him feeling comfortable being affectionate with her and being in a vulnerable enough headspace to let himself be super needy with her :')

tbh i think his breakup was the first and only breakup to really devastate him. he's dated people in the past but he's never connected with them the way he did ellie, and that combined with the fact he was already in a fragile headspace had him SPIRALING, even if it's for the best and they really weren't that good for each other. poor guy lol

anyway his ass is TOUCH STARVED but only for the people he really trusts basically. he needs a good cuddle but he will not accept it from just anyone, y'know? he gets easily overwhelmed by touch otherwise, both for trauma and autism reasons, so he has to really love you to let you so much as hug him in an offstage context

that's how you KNOW he loves the cornley drama society, dammit. he wouldn't let them hug him the way he does at the end of the specials if he didn't and i WILL fight you on that lol

okay i'm going to end this here cuz i've. already typed so much ALKSDJKLFDF but thank you for the excuse to talk about chris and i'm sorry this took so long :') <3 i hope you enjoyed regardless nonny!

[all-pacas]

What does a stay-at-home dad Chase look like? Is he active in the PTA? When the kids are older, does he coach the kids' teams? How many times does he take them to the ocean? Do they really spend summers in Melbourne?

they do not spend summers in melbourne because, lbr, chase also hasn't gone home in like a decade at this point lmao. they do go, though! just a lot less often than he'd daydreamed. it probably IS important to him that his kids know their cousin/s, though. depending on how things with his sister are going.

however they do go to the ocean as often as he possibly can make the drive to the jersey shore lmao. he keeps hinting his spouse should find a job closer to the beach. maybe in california. maybe on a beach. in california. he's only half joking.

i don't think chase is on the pta, he's not ... he suffered way too much of those expectations and pressure to live up to his father's wishes, i think he feels Very strongly about not repeating this, not at all hinting or pressuring his kids.

i actually think he probably has a slight crisis about it all, maybe not when the first kid is born (he works nicu he can handle an infant) but in a few years, right? because socratic method says chase -- he was very, very hands on with his mother and sister. he was organized and controlling and felt so deeply responsible for them both. and i think -- he might get caught up in that again. he HAS to take care of them. he HAS to make sure everything is perfect, it's his JOB, he can't trust anyone else, etc. i don't think he'd go full breakdown, but yeah, i think he'd be so worried about repeating the past that he kind of does it anyway, you know?

actually i bet he'd LOVE coaching a youth soccer team. are you kidding. dream job. they wouldn't even be any good but he'd have so much fun playing with 8 year olds all day.

as happy as he'd be as a trophy husband/stay at home parent, he doesn't know how to cook. at all. he can make boxed mac and cheese and that's about the level. so they're still living on takeout. but like. fancy takeout.

[galsinspace]

Replaying Inquisiton really made me notice (again) how the companions are written with such an incredibly noticeable difference in care. Man I hope they did a better job in Veilguard. And it's such a stark contrast from Origins!

I'll just post my comparative ramblings bc I'm on a train and have nothing better to do

In my opinion, one of the best things about Origins is the closeness you develop with your companions. You're with them through massive, formative changes in their lives, you find out about their childhood traumas and the people they've grown up to be, and as a player you make huge decisions that shape their future. By the end I felt so close to these characters. Looking at the main companions:

Alistair? We find out all about his longing for family, for love, his desire not to be defined by his blood and be able to live a normal life. You're both saddled with the responsibility to save the world together, and you do. Depending on the choices you make, he may have the love he longs for, and he may have to be king, you shape his life in a huge way.

Leliana? She literally seeks you out because she's received visions and is on a god-given mission. You literally shape the kind of person she becomes, whether she hardens or softens her heart.

Zevran? This is the most important period in his life. His flight from the Crows, his suicidal intent and then sudden wish to stay alive after all, finding new things to live for, remembering his mother, you save his life in more ways than one.

Morrigan? Literally the first time she's left her abusive mother's side and it's travelling with you. She finds her own ways to live, you give her the jewellery her mother wouldn't allow her, you help her confront her mother and free herself from her. You might literally be the father of her child.

Sten? Also suicidal, and you help him regain his self worth and sense of meaning in life. And you change him. He comes from a society with rigid rules and you help him see other ways of life. If you play as a woman, he's literally confused in the beginning that you're a fighter, and then as you gain his affection he acknowledges and respects you as who you are. He's not romanceable and probably changes the least out if the companions, but still goes through this monumental change of perspective about there being other valid ways of life. Sten should have been romanceable lbr

Oghren? It's super unfortunate how comic relief he is BECAUSE his story is so intense. The woman he loves disappeared! He's an alcoholic! He's so tied into the MAIN QUEST! He's tragic! You're with him through this massive thing he goes through and it really sucks that he can't really... change. You can't really help him. But even so, the events of the game are monumental to his life.

The Secret Companion is self-explanatory. You completely re-shape his life.

And in comparison, the companions in Inquisition are just WILDLY hit or miss. Some of them you become incredibly close to, others are just kinda there. Oh we're saving the world together? Just another day at the office babey. You don't really get to know them that deeply, you don't get to change their views, they're just there and you work together and then they go on their way. I'm of course talking mainly about Vivienne and Sera.

It's insane to me that Vivienne is this incredibly complex character who is the way she is because she grew up traumatized in an oppressive environment and you never get to talk to her about this. It's hidden in a few comments Cole may or may not drop if you travel with both of them. Her polished demeanor and ever-present smile? Learned in the Circle to demonstrate to templars that she was good, obedient, and non-possessed. Her materialism? When she met the duke, the thought in her head was I will never go hungry again.

Vivienne is TRAGIC. She's a deeply traumatized woman who has lived all her life in a system that did not grant her basic security, and she was strong and smart enough to gather power in the only ways she was allowed to. And you can't even talk to her about this. Her personal quest is some weird red herring bullshit meant to make you question whether she's a villain, comparing her to the evil queen from Snow White, and then it's just... her boyfriend dying. You can't change anything. You can barely talk to her about this relationship - it must have been a mix of love and practicality, a connection that gave her both tenderness and influence, the only power she was allowed to have. And it IS an injustice that she could never have married him! But you can't talk to her about this. Can't influence her viewpoint at all. All this complexity is hidden in subtext, and Vivienne does not change as a person at all.

Vivienne is outwardly cold towards Cole, dismissive, pragmatic, cruel. If Cole becomes more human, he points out to her that she secretly worried about him and is glad he's safe. She denies it. This is the only complexity she's allowed to show, hidden in random banter most players will never hear.

Why are we not allowed to be close to Vivienne? Why can't we talk to her? Explore who she is? Why does it feel like it literally does not matter whether we touch her life at all?

I've seen people claim that the fandom neglects Vivienne unfairly, but this was the WRITERS. They neglected Vivienne. They made it impossible to be close to her, they hid her complexity while just having her be straight-up rude for most of the game. This was a huge failure on the part of the writers. I've heard that her main writer said on twitter (DA writers should not be allowed to tweet) that he just didn't like her and that makes me so mad. Fucking video game writers...

And Sera. Oh, Sera.

She's annoying. Her jokes are painfully unfunny. It's super hard to get her to like you. Whenever you talk to her, the first option is to kick her out of the Inquisition. Why on EARTH did they write her this way?

Her personal quest is nothing. You go meet some guy, kill him, over. What does this MEAN??? What does this mean for Sera's character?? It's so fully useless, you learn nothing new, you don't get closer to Sera, who the fuck wrote this and why was this published.

And just like with Vivienne, you barely get to talk to Sera. She runs around with a huge case of internalized elf racism and you never get to talk about it. She literally won't put on armour marked as "elves only", what's up with that girl? She openly looks down on elves to the point of being annoyed to even talk to an elf Inquisitor, why can we never talk to her about this?

She's supposed to be from Denerim. Is she from the Alienage? The close-knit community Tabris is from? Does she know Tabris? She might literally know the Hero of Ferelden and it's never a topic of conversation. She would have been like, a young teenager at the time when the Alienage was suffering a plague and elves were being kidnapped and sold into slavery. Was this not a formative experience for her? Was she not there? Did she not live in the Alienage? Well all of Denerim became a war zone during the Blight, was that not a notable event in her life????

Why do we not get to explore anything that makes her the dismissive, flighty person she is?

Playing in German, there is fascinating ambiguity in the graveyard of your companion's fears that you find in the Fade - Sera's greatest fear is "nothing". In German, the word for the Fade is "the Nothing". I thought it made so much sense that that would be her greatest fear! She's afraid of anything involving magic and spirits, and it adds a nice metaphorical level to her rejection of anything elven: elves are supposed to be inherently connected to the Fade, but she's afraid of the Fade! Comments she makes seem to imply that she has a suppressed sensitivity to spirits, but either Solas or Cole suggesting that that might be the case clearly terrifies her.

Well, imagine my disappointment when I found out that in the original English, her fear is just "nothing". Which is bullshit too, Sera is clearly afraid of of anything Fade-related. I guess it might be some idea of how she's afraid of quiet and non-existence, but like... what a missed opportunity. What a dumb thing to be her greatest fear. What a missed opportunity.

And just like Vivienne, it doesn't feel like you really impact her life at all. Sera just comes and goes, she does her own thing, and she never unpacks any of her issues. Why was she written this way? Why did they think this would be a compelling companion experience? And for fuck's sake, who thought she was funny?

This rant is already way too long and I'm almost off the train so I won't write a full comparison to the Inquisition companions who were done well, but like, it's obvious. For some of them you touch their lives intimately, you shape their worlds, you actually feel close to them by the end of the game. How the fuck did this game get shipped with Vivi and Sera like that.

It's been 10 years and I hope the developers learned from their mistakes, if they noticed them in between sucking their own dicks on twitter.

[tcoaal]

What do you think about Jane? Will we ever see her in the story? I saw some posts on my feed about her being overprotective of Julia in a similar way as Andrew is to Ashley, and it made me wonder if she’ll play a bigger role in subsequent parts/chapters

i think she's interesting!!! i can't really agree with the take she's similar in protectiveness to Andrew though. Andrew is "protective" of Ashley in a really demented way due to their toxic co-dependency. Jane is pretty rough around the edges and while she can dish it she definitely has problems taking it (Andrew fucking won that fight lbr even though Julia was completely in the right), but i think her protectiveness and fiery demeanor definitely comes out of a significantly more healthy place of sibling love and worry for one-another vs. what Andrew and Ashley have going on

it's... hard to say. i felt like the potential scene with 3A with Julia on the phone was meant to be like, a definitive end to the plot thread with Julia, and i haven't expected her to show up in Decay Chapter 4. but i suppose it's possible they can show up? in which case, i wonder if choosing to do the phone call in the True Route of 3A might affect the final ending? if she and Jane do show up in Chapter 4, i suspect they're going to be like... Andrew's and Ashley's final on-screen victims. like, the last kills they have on-screen unless it leads to a murder-suicide or one outright murdering the other even if they live.

i don't think they'll show up in chapter 4 though. i think their arcs reached a conclusion. but hey, i could be wrong! i personally don't think we'll see them again, at least not in the Decay True Ending, but also that's not a hill i'm willing to die on or bet money on, if that makes sense. i would personally only bet on Julia in that case though

[hellboundhimbo]

Pleeeeeease talk more about Kuwameshi I live for your takes

well. don't mind if i do. you have no idea what you've just unleashed btw.

so like they're sooooo attached to each other right like SOO fucking dependent. both of them trying to die for each other every five seconds, yusuke constantly crashing out because kuwabara like. stubbed his toe a full continent away. episode 89 just generally. they're basically attached at the hip. and on one hand watching them beat each other up while also caring sooooo embarrassingly much is cute its also like low-key kinda codependent. like oh you don't know who you are without him? erm. and while I do think a big reason for that is just bc they're quite literally the only other person among their peers who would understand the trauma they've experienced what with dark tournament n all, there's also a degree of personal shit for both of them that impacts it.

cuz like. lbr at the start of the show yusuke was very very lonely. its part of the reason he just writes off kuwabara as a run of the mill punk chasing glory, at first. why he's so surprised at kuwabara's breakdown at his wake. yusuke has this idea in his head that he's no good for nobody, navigating a world where every man fends for themself. seeing that "hey ppl care if I live" is really impactful for yusuke, even if he never fully processes that lesson. and he still has that idea that "oh kuwabara's just some dumbass" going into The Promise, but ofc he has his shit flipped on him when he realizes "oh this guy's really cool actually." and from that point onward yusuke just gets sooooo attached so quickly. bc like other than keiko, kuwabara was yusuke's first real friend.

and rq that is NOT DISCREDITING THE IMPORTANCE OF YUSUKE AND KEIKO'S BOND NONONO but there's a clear distinction there between what yusuke and keiko have vs what yusuke and kuwabara have for a number of factors, the whole "not really able to have a normal friendship bc you've been paired off as a couple since diapers" thing only being part of it. kuwabara's a lot like yusuke in a lot of ways. hot headed delinquents with shitty grades judged by their mentors with less than conventional family lives (kuwabara was practically raised by shizuru despite her only being like 17-20smth in canon. there's implications there I think.)

its just that in a lot of ways they're genuine equals and lord knows yusuke needs someone to relate to at the point in his life he's at. moreover kuwabara was never afraid to challenge yusuke, something he clearly values and revels in, even if yusuke himself sees it less of an actual rivalry and more of a bit of fun. he's forced to recognize in The Promise how good of a guy kuwabara actually is and that made an impression on yusuke, nihilistic and untrusting as he is. and as we all know yusuke's protective of the people he cares about, but its like. its different with kuwabara. because unlike someone like keiko kuwabara runs headfirst into danger. he's a fighter!! a manly man if you will. and yusuke fucking Hates that because HELLO you're not allowed to get hurt ever you mean too much to me. but he's also beating up kuwabara on the reg bc duh they still fight. so its this weird kinda dissonance where yusuke's like "NO ONE'S ALLOWED TO BEAT UP KUWABARA BUT ME" and that's very funny and lowkey fruity ngl. stop trying to kill my girlfriend only I'm allowed to bully him.

obv the whole being overly protective angle takes on a whole new context as the show goes on but I think if I got into anything post chapter black this post would end up longer than my last longfic so. I'm just gonna say that kuwabara taking yusuke's protectiveness as him thinking kuwabara is weak (or a joke as he puts it which feeds into his larger sidekick/inferiority complex when compared to the rest of team urameshi) it's just. ugh stupid idiots with their stupid egos and pride.

SPEAKING OF KUWABARA that boy is so insanely whipped it's not even funny. like yes yes yusuke is totally gay for kuwabara I feel that in my bones and there's So Much there. stupid fuckin romance anime bubbles in the promise (manga.) literally keeping up with a SPEEDING CAR ON A BIKE just to save kuwa. again yusuke crashing out whenever kuwabara's even slightly in danger. kuwabara constantly being set up as yusuke's damsel in distress, for some fuckin reason. super gay. but Oh My God Kuwabara. he is so in love with him its not even FUnny and how do I even articulate that without pointing at episode 89 and going !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hes just. sooooo hopelessly devoted man. for YEARSSSSS. "winning's never been the reason I fight him" ITS NOT ABOUT WINNING.... he just. he fixated on yusuke for so long obsessed over earning his respect followed him into hell and back over and over and over again literally tried to DIEEEE for him. "YOU'VE ALWAYS GOTTA BE THERE URAMESHI DONT YOU GET IT. IF YOURE NOT THEN WHO AM I" I'm gonna IHFRBIFVBIVHOFHSI. he just wants yusuke to SEE HIM to respect him as an equal but because yusuke wants to protect him he just processes it as "oh you think I'm weak" but THATS NOT IT!! HE JUST CARES ABT U DNSA and then kuwabara's like "yeah I'm actually gonna try to die for you again but DONT U DARE TRY AND PULL THAT SHIT W ME" I hate them basically.

again they're soooo sweet on each other but in that same breath like I do think their lil divorce in ep 98 was sorta necessary. not just bc of the events of canon but again kuwabara was just. he didn't know what to do with himself without yusuke there with him. the romance of "I need you" vs the logical thought "hey wait that's. that's not healthy." idkidk this was absolutely incoherent I just have a lot of thoughts on them. I care them deeply. kuwameshi forever and ever but also I need them to die.

anyway. them.

[thanatologie]

@extravagantliar - Are there different rights that the necropolis will follow if someone is of a different faith or there were other contextual conditions in which the bones needed to be sequestered ( lyrium )? How does Em feel about that, or is it simply part of his job that he takes seriously? Are there quandaries he has between faith, life and possible death? 

so…i'm gonna put forth what is possibly a controversial opinion here, so bear with me, but i'm gonna go ahead and say that for all that cassandra thinks nevarra is weird (despite being nevarran) and the necropolis is weird (despite, you know, her heavy familial connection to all of it), she's probably just as weird to them as they are to her.  i say this because lbr, cassandra leans heavily into her faith, and while i know nevarra is, on paper, heavily andrastian considering the whole…andraste was captured here! footnote in the travel brochures, i also think - especially where it concerns the mortalitasi and especially the mourn watch - it's largely performative so they're left alone to do their own thing.  

i say this because not once - not a single time, not in any dialogue i have personally found - has emmrich volkarin ever mentioned the maker or andraste in a religious sense and when the whole bit about the golden city came to light in solas's memories not once did he even seem the slightest bit surprised and instead is entirely more excited about the discovery of it all.  it's almost like religion just…doesn't factor into things for him, and you know what.  i don't think it does.  i don't think he's remotely religious in any sense.  this would make me, like.  two for two on atheistic / agnostic characters and i'm getting real tired of finding parallels between emmrich and tony, let me tell you.

anyway, this is something i've been simmering on because while, yes, the soul exists and he knows that (corpse whisperer and all that), i don't think there's any religious component to anything at all for him.  his religion is the ritual and the repetition and the discovery.  science.  his religion is the comfortable predictable unpredictability of science, is what i'm saying.

feels good to clear the air on that one, tbh.

so…when it comes to other belief systems and how they handle things like death / burial / mourning, like.  we actually know how the mourn watch especially treats that!  mostly thanks to the mourn watch being like…weirdly them about things, tbh.  (god, they're so fucking weird, guys, they are so, so weird.)  like first and foremost, emmrich goes out of his way to ask a (non-romanced) rook how they'd like their body to be handled after death.

and-  i just wanna take a sideswerve here to address the elephant in the room:  yes, you and i and a grey warden rook absolutely know they'll get hit with the calling and die in the deep roads.  we know this.  emmrich at this point does not.  emmrich's firsthand knowledge of the grey wardens at this point are the statues in nevarra city of them and their griffons, what little bit he's learned from davrin, and what he saw at weisshaupt, which was a fucking slaughterhouse and he was scared out of his fucking mind (why do you think he's babbling so many questions, babes, he's trying to focus on anything but the carnage around him, which he was not ready for and did not expect to be a part of).  he wouldn't have known about the calling.  he wouldn't have known about the ultimate fate of the wardens.  he lives in a cloistered echo chamber, his exposure to the outside world has been very, very limited up until the point he joins the veilguard.  he doesn't have access to the information we, the player, do.  stomps foot tired of the lololol that's so stupid commentary he doesn't know.

this man is gonna walk away from this whole thing with so much ptsd-

anyway, depending on the response he gives various answers but like.  it's a thing, right, he's already thinking ahead and getting that information together just in case it is left to him to handle rook's body if they die, and he wants to make sure he handles it the way they wish.  in fact, he honestly probably weirded the whole damn team out by asking them all the same question, because it's his moral imperative to see to their bodies after death if they're all in this together, and (especially in the case of rook not being mourn watch - and even they are he's the senior watcher) it'll fall to him to make sure it's done to their wishes, no matter what their wishes are.  as weird as it is, this is a professional kindness he's offering them.  this is literally part of his actual job and he's extremely serious about doing his fucking job.

and it's not like they're not knowledgeable about other cultures and their death practices, because he comments on them literally all the fucking time in his dialogue, because death is his obsession and his special interest.  he mentions the avvar.  he (i fully believe purposely to prove a point - it's a classic dad move honestly) incorrectly assumes the point of ancient qunari funerary vessels to taash (mostly to get them to correct him as to prove the point they know more than they give themselves credit for).  he doesn't understand - on a deeply personal level, why other cultures burn their dead, but he knows they do it, and even if he doesn't agree with it if that was someone's wish for their body, i'm pretty sure he'd fucking do it, as sick as it makes him to do so.

and even the watcher that's overseeing the room bodies of fallen allies are being kept in before the final battle points out that they'll be handled when things are over in the manner of where they're from.  which means if you're from a place that burns your dead, the mourn watch will no doubt erect a pyre and burn the dead.  they have their own beliefs, yes, but they respect the beliefs of other cultures and carry out those beliefs to the best of their ability.

unless you're an intruder in the necropolis, apparently, which.  fair.  that's their ultimate playground and you run the risk of your skeleton being used to sweep sand for eternity if you break in.

with the rest of it…like.  i mean that's his whole thing, right.  torn between life and accepting death, trying to find that get out of death free card with lichdom.  so…secondary unpopular opinion time:  not downplaying his actual thanaphobia at all - it's there, it's real, and it definitely stems from the unresolved trauma of his parents' deaths, he literally says he never dealt with it and it shows - the ultimate problem with emmrich is that he's been so afraid of dying he's never bothered to actually live.  like…he's locked into his little routine before we, the player, go scoop him out of his comfort zone and the enabling of the mourn watch, because routine is safe.  he's not living, not really, but he's falling into that trap of everything just so will keep the bad things away.  he hasn't left nevarra in years.  while that wouldn't be so unusual because necromancers pretty much mostly stay there (no doubt for safety reasons) this is a guy who wants to see what the world has to offer and is so wrapped up in his fear he's hesitated his whole damn life to go out and do it.

like every time he talks about this - wishing he'd traveled, wishing he'd gotten married, etc - to harding it's like he's already lost his chance.  and in his mind, no doubt, he has!  like he's, what, in his early 50s, but the way he talks you'd think he has one foot in the nursing home already despite - as a mage - what could be several more decades of life ahead of him.  like he doesn't still have time to travel (which harding points out he's literally doing right that very second), or to get married, or to have a family (which i'd argue he already does in manfred but that is neither here nor there - point is he's still fully capable of having children and watching them grow to adulthood even without timey wimey mage shit thrown in).

so, long story short, i think the problem here isn't necessarily emmrich's fear of death - lots of people have that fear, in the way he does, and maybe they don't get over it completely but you learn to cope with it, right, make peace with it, and i think he can, too, given the right encouragement and push - it's in reality, emmrich is afraid of living.  and i think that - the regret that he's hesitated on so many steps life can take, having given up so much of what he wants as a daydream - is what's holding him back, making him hesitate when it comes to lichdom.  he hasn't lived, and he knows it, and i think he ultimately regrets that and thinks it's too late to start now (even if it's not).  it's like i've said before:  it's not just manfred that blossoms and grows once the pair of them leave the necropolis, emmrich has the opportunity to find the sort of life he's always wanted, too, if he wants to and he realizes it.