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dangerpronebuddie · 1 year ago

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Kiss Me Once Cause You Know I Had A Long Night 7/?

28. An accidental kiss between two exes?

Summary:

Ravi's eyes widened. "Um... what was that?"

Hen and Buck frowned at him. "What was what?" Buck asked.

"Eddie kissed you," Ravi stated.

"That is what boyfriends tend to do," Hen said.

"Bo- boyfriends?" Ravi frowned. "I didn't know you got back together."

(Ravi definitely thinks Buck and Eddie are divorced.)

(Read below!) Muah!

"For the last time, I didn't say the q word!" Ravi cried. He'd been hearing the accusation for the entirety of a hellish twenty four hour shift. Now, standing in the locker rooms, the guys weren't about to let up. Well, guy, singular. Chim started in around their third call in the span of an hour, and hadn't stopped since.

Chim slammed his locker closed. "Somebody must've. It was you or Diaz, I'm certain of it."

"No wonder you always lose the betting pools, Chim," Eddie grinned beside him as he buttoned his shirt. "We didn't say it. It was just a wacky shift."

Chim glared at the two of them. Ravi shook his head and opened his locker. "You're just upset you weren't the one to do the maneuver today."

Chim made an affronted noise. "It was my turn," he defended.

"You can go next time," Buck piped up with a grin.

"Too soon, Buckley," Chim said, jabbing a finger at him.

Ravi had heard several stories about the infamous lightning incident. He knew Chim blamed himself for not insisting on going up. But Buck never once blamed him. There was no one to blame at all. Ravi was just glad Buck was starting to actually process his death, instead of hide it.

Buck shrugged. "Just saying. It was Ravi's turn anyway. He had to have his first time."

Ravi beamed. The maneuver was a lot more fun than it had any right to be.

"Wait a sec," Eddie frowned. "I've never done the maneuver either."

"Because you're always the one making sure I don't fall when I do it," Buck grinned.

"Then next time, I can do it," Eddie declared, shrugging into his suede jacket.

"Oh no you don't, Diaz," Chim protested. "Me first." He hiked his duffle onto his shoulder and marched out.

"I'm gonna convince Bobby to make a chart so we take turns," Buck mused.

"And conveniently leave Chim off of it?" Ravi guessed.

Buck grinned widely. Ravi never wanted to be on his bad side. Again anyway.

The three filed out into the cold December wind, meeting Hen near the doors.

"You guys want to grab a beer?" she suggested.

The three nodded in a chorus of agreement.

"I'll meet you guys there," Eddie said, "I've gotta drop Chris off at a friend's house for the weekend."

"Don't let him forget his coat this time," Buck scolded.

"I still maintain that was on you, bud," Eddie grinned. He gave Buck a quick kiss before marching off to his truck.

Ravi's eyes widened. "Um... what was that?"

Hen and Buck frowned at him. "What was what?" Buck asked.

"Eddie kissed you," Ravi stated.

"That is what boyfriends tend to do," Hen said.

"Bo- boyfriends?" Ravi frowned. "I didn't know you got back together."

"We've... never not been?" Buck's frown deepened.

"But I thought... You guys were divorced weren't you?" Ravi was probably confusing everyone else more than himself. Even Hen was looking at him like he grew a second head.

"Where... did you get that idea?" Buck asked.

"When I was a probie, you guys were always together. Then just before he left for dispatch you were hardly speaking. I just thought you guys broke up or something," Ravi explained, feeling his face heat.

"They're just like that," Hen waved off.

"Uh, hey now," Buck protested.

"Buck, come on. You guys have been divorced maybe three times already," she drawled.

"Okay, technically it was only two. The second time was completely different," Buck reasoned. "The lawsuit and the Natalia thing are the only divorces we've had."

"I'm so confused," Ravi whispered. He really wished he hadn't brought it up.

"Alright," Buck sighed, slinging an arm over Ravi's shoulders and steering him to Ravi's car. "Time for a history lesson, kid."

Ravi looked at Hen, his eyes wide as saucers. She merely cackled and wished him luck as she left for her car.

By the time they reached the bar, Ravi knew it all:

Shannon

The ladder truck (ouch)

The tsunami (double ouch)

The lawsuit (fools)

The well (yikes)

The shooting (which Ravi cried through the story)

And the lightning (which he missed thanks to his own side quest.)

He even got the abridged version of how Buck and Eddie became a very much not divorced couple. Of all ways, Ravi did not expect how it actually happened.

He assumed it would be after one of their many close calls, or after a night out drinking. Even a quiet afternoon in a park somewhere seemed more plausible. What actually occurred was a jealous Buck kissing Eddie just within eyesight of the PTA after no less than thirty parents spent the evening hitting on Eddie.

When Ravi asked why Buck picked that specific moment, Buck shrugged and said something about tomorrow not being promised to anyone.

#911 #buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #ravi panikkar #hen wilson #chimney han #fanfic #my writing #i need a tag for these

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kellyvela · 1 year ago

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I don't even want to go to Twitter and Instagram, there must already be a lot of gloating haters and joe fans out there celebrating the victory, ugh. I know that perez h*lton is a bad person and often lies, but it's even disgusting to read such an assumption. On what basis did he write it at all? Did joe buy such an article from him?

I'm in a very bad mood now. I'm worried now and I'm not so sure of Sophie's win. If such a situation really happens, then the world is just an unfair and lousy place and the world is really falling apart and humanity does not expect anything good, it will be totally wrong and unfair, I will stop believing in goodness, justice and in general that there can be something good in life at all.

After all, the truth is on Sophie's side, she gave birth to these children, she raised them, she is stable, she is a good mother, etc, etc and joe is a bad person, an unreliable father and a really damn rat.

Sorry for negative, I was already in such a bad mood, and now this makes me want to cry

I'm not seeing too much fuzz really, since there are bigger news, like Kate Middelton drama.

The day the news (Sophie requesting the divorce re-activation) appeared, I saw just a few of those 🐀 cultists falling in the clickbait, accusing Sophie to be the bad guy and that now, because of her, all the divorce case will be public, so she's an hypocrite for not allowing pap pics of her girls, but making the whole case public at the same time. Look, they will always find something to say to make Sophie look bad, and paint their fave as some hero . . . . So better not paying them any attention.

I didn't listen that PH podcast, but I bet they argue about the girls were born in US, being US citizen, and Florida being a red estate and favoring fathers in custody battles.

But a Federal court took out the custody from the Florida Estate court's jurisdiction, and ordered mediation and the case was taken to a UK court and it seems they reached an agreement there on January 11, 2024, and that's why Sophie dropped the international lawsuit on said Federal court, wich was made public around January 17, 2024.

A friend told me they believe that what is still in dispute is child support, since the 🐀 doesn't want to pay anything, arguing that both parents are capable to provide for the girls when they individually have them.

That's why, his answer to Sophie requesting the re-activation of the divorce was this:

"The filing was a legal formality, and the couple continues to negotiate an amicable resolution."

We will have to wait and see, anon. We can't do anything else, but please, stay calm ❤️

#anon asks #sophie turner

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artofgabe · 2 years ago

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LOST WILL

Disclaimer:

This story is not intended to mock the omegaverse trial or anyone involved.This is all just for fun and as and writing it out of boredom.

My life turned upside down when that cursed folder landed on my desk before I even had my morning coffee. I kept staring at the fresh case I’m about to handle while the eager teaspoon clinked against my ceramic mug, swirling the sweet caffeine inside.

“What’s this about?” I said.

“It’s some publishing case. About some…” Mat gave a dragging sigh. “… fictional story.” He munched on the breakfast donut in his hands, with some crumbs falling onto my desk. I’ll have to deal with that later cause I don’t want to deal with ants. “Yeah, that’s about it,” he added.

I groaned as I placed my mug on the desk and opened the folder. My name is Will and I’ve been working as a copyright attorney for four years now. Been dealing with tons of cases from small time creators being screwed over by big corporations or finally claiming that public domain song. I’ve seen it all.

Or so I thought.

I glanced at the lawsuit and started skimming over it. The title and the case number seemed all like squiggles to me. It’s too early for this. Lifting my cup, I drink more of my coffee, feeling it shake my body and my brain awake to take on this pile of papers. The more my eyes skimmed the lines of text, some words started catching my attention. Wolf-like. Knotting. Omega verse.

“Mat. What am I reading?” I glanced up at where I thought my co-worker was standing, assuming he was still by my desk. But he disappeared. Probably by the printer again, flirting with Jane.

I grabbed my coffee and took another sip, my eyes going over the case before me. The case started off explaining to me about the origin of this thing called omega verse. Learning the definition of the terms in this kink fandom sent a blush on my cheeks. I turned around me to see if anyone was looking and snickering in the background. I’m honestly expecting that this was just a prank. Like an episode of Punked or something. But everyone was busy tending to their own business, filing cases and reviewing them. When I came to the part about their biology of how they mated, I realized something.

The universe is definitely laughing at me.

...

It was Friday night, and the welcoming bar just filled up with people. As if they’re excited to drink their worries away for the upcoming weekend. The smell of cigarettes and alcohol danced in the air as a tacky jukebox song played in the background. I sat by the corner, the one with the overused leather benches. I wanted us to be a few steps away from the main bar, just in case we needed more drinks. Especially now with what I’m about to tell them. Oh god, what am I supposed to tell them? How will I start with it?

‘Hey, I’ve come across this case called omega verse. Have you guys heard of it?’ No. They’ll probably think I’m into it. Which I am so not. I started into my beer bottle, sweating from the chilly place it just came out of. Just like me.

'You guys will never guess what landed on my desk two days ago.’ Hmm. I feel my stomach churning from either flight or fright. This is the time I’m actually thankful that I’m divorced now. My ex-wife would probably think I’m a weirdo.

I glanced at my watch. Shoot. Five minutes too early.

“Yo Will, you look like you need sleep, man.” A hand landed on my shoulder, snapping me out of my thoughts. I looked beside me and saw it was one of my college friends, Kevin. His relaxed curly brown hair and loose necktie made him look ready to wind down and chill after a hectic week. He’s been a good friend of mine and dorm mate since I started law school. Actually, he’s the one who introduced me to my ex-wife.

“Hey man,” I said and scooted to the side to give him space on the bench, “how’s life treating you?”

Kevin called the server and ordered two bottles of beer before getting back to me. “Doing good. How’s the deal with Clarice doing?”

I shrugged my stiff shoulders. “We just finalized it with the court last week.”

“Oh really? You’re looking better nowadays, actually.” Kevin took a swig of the bottle and drank it before placing it down on the table. “Well, last week at least. Now, you look shot.”

“You don’t know half of it.” I said.

Kevin’s eyebrow rose. “Something came up?”

“No, I’ll… I’ll let you know later.” I kept swirling the beer, deep in thought. I don’t even know what to say if they ask how I’m doing. Would they even believe me? How the hell should I start about it, anyway? Heck, I don’t even know how I’ll explain the terminologies and—

“Dave!” Kevin raised his hand, waving over another close friend of ours. Dave smiled, showing his perfect teeth. Kinda fitting in his line of work on business law. He can get out of everything, especially during our college days. He once convinced our professor that he had already passed his assignment and just missed checking it. But he actually snuck in after the fact and wedged it in between the pile of papers. Dave sat across from us as he ordered a beer from the server.

“Good to be back here, guys.” Dave took a large gulp before sighing refreshingly. “So how’s your case going?”

Kevin raised his shoulders and gave us a smug look. “Ah well, I had to settle a divorced couple on who gets to own the espresso machine and the Lambo.”

Dave winced. “That’s messy, man.”

“They have a dog, though,” Kevin rubbed the back of his neck before taking another drink. “That’s the one giving me a shitty migraine.”

“How about you, Dave?” I asked, trying to keep my voice from shaking. Why am I so jumpy? “How’s corporate law?”

“Same boat, actually.” Our friend shook his head and pursed his lips. “We’re trying to fix this CEO who had a word out that he embezzled millions of company funds. The investors want his head. Bad.”

I furrowed my brows. “That definitely sucks. Is this the one on the news the other day?”

“Yep. Same guy.” Dave said, his bottle halfway empty. I gazed at the colored bottle in his hands as I kept thinking about what to say to my friends if they asked me how I’m doing.

Kevin suddenly nudged me, “How about you, Will?” his eyebrows went up and down, and the grin on his face barely hid the eagerness he was showing. “You were gonna say something earlier.”

“Oh, what’s this about?” Dave leaned over with an expectant gaze.

“He’s been losing sleep over something. And this is the man who had just gained back his singlehood!” Kevin chuckled.

I glanced at both of them, trying to keep my voice from reaching a pitch too high out of nervousness. “C’mon man, you always have the most interesting shit to say every time we meet.”

Glancing down at my beer bottle, I hypnotized myself on the swirling foam and malt I could see from the small opening. I hope they forgive me for what I’m about to say.

“You okay W—”

“—I have to research how a male alpha breeds a male omega and learn about omega heat cycles.”

A shocked silence enveloped the both of them. I made sure not to make eye contact and just continued drinking the last ounce of my alcohol.

“Excuse me, but what the fuck?” Kevin said.

“You heard me.” I glanced at him.

Dave raised his hand to the server. “We need another set of beer here.”

...

Our table is halfway filled with beer bottles. We ordered some food to munch on, as they kept asking more questions about my case. Kevin has removed his blazer and laid it down beside him. Dave, meanwhile, moved his seat beside me. My two friends made sure I’m sandwiched between them.

“Okay.” Kevin ran his fingers through his curls. “I get the part where this publisher is suing others for copyright infringement, cause you know, same idea and shit.” He kissed his bottle and took a few more gulps. “But Jesus Christ Will, an entire fandom dedicated to this kink? And I didn’t know about this?”

“Don’t forget,” Dave chuckled, “she stole the idea but claims it’s not ‘fanfic’.” He quoted in the air.

“Look, I’m still researching who is in the wrong and who is in the right. But—"

“—No, fuck that, Will.” Kevin leaned closer. “What is the omega verse, though?”

Dave opened another bottle and raised it against us, awaiting my explanation. I rubbed my flushed face in before giving out a sigh.

“Well, it’s like a premise of a world where there’s three genders.” I said. “And they’re called Alpha, Betas, and Omegas.”

“Alpha. Like an alpha male? As in frat boys?” Dave’s eyebrow rose. “Don’t we have that? The chads, the nice guys, and the simps?” Kevin and Dave chuckled and clinked their beers together.

I shook my head. “No, like literally. It can be like from any time period, but that’s the gist of it. A society where there are three genders. The Betas are like us. Only beta men can impregnate beta women. No mating cycles and no so-called ‘pheromones’ that influence us to mate like animals.”

“Holy shit, Will.” Kevin gave me an impressed look. “You’re the most vanilla-ass man I’ve ever met! And look at you now lecturing me about kinks—”

“—Shh!” Never have I ever covered his mouth so fast. “Kevin please keep it down.” My face grew hotter as I felt myself embarrassed by some of the bar patrons glancing in our direction.

“Okay?” Kevin raised his hands. “What about an alpha and omega?”

I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down before I took a drink of the malty beer, letting it flow down into my throat smoothly. Yep, I definitely need this. I really wanna prepare myself for what I’m about to lie on the table.

“Well, only male and female alphas can impregnate male and female omegas.”

“I’m sorry.” Dave waved his hands to hold everything up. “Did you just say that alphas are the only ones able to breed with an omega? So, like even female alphas, can get a male omega pregnant?”

I nodded.

“How does that work, though, dude?” Kevin raised his hand. This time, he ordered tequila. Frankly, I think I need one too. A bottle of clear liquid landed on our table, along with three shot glasses.

“Okay Will, we’re ready. Talk.” Kevin said as he poured each in the glasses and passed it to us.

“Well,” I started, taking down the shot. “So alphas, whether male or female, have um…”

“Dicks. Just say it, man.” Kevin had the most neutral expression that made me second guess why I’m friends with him in the first place.

My eyes shut in embarrassment. I took the tequila bottle and poured some. Not one, but two shots. I can’t believe I am talking about werewolf kink from the internet. On a Friday night. At a bar. With my friends. Who are actual lawyers.

“Fine. Both male and female have dicks. And they are into this mating cycle called ‘rut’. And it enables them to breed with the omega successfully. During mating, whether normal mating or doing it during a rut, they can do this thing called knotting. It’s like…it locks the dick in and they’re unable to, you know…” my hand gestures to let them put two and two together, “…pull out until it’s done.”

“Like for canines?” Dave’s eyebrows rose.

“Kinky.” Kevin chuckled and took another shot of the clear alcohol.

I raised my brows in agreement. “And the omega male and female meanwhile have this thing called ‘heat’ where they would wanna mate with an alpha. They would get turned on by the smell of pheromones. And during heat cycles, they can get pregnant, like I said.”

Dave’s eyebrow rose. “Holy shit. So even women alphas have dicks?”

“So omega males have pussies and carry babies?” Kevin added.

I choked on the next shot of alcohol, amazed at how crass my two friends were. Sweet Lord almighty, I became an intellectual property lawyer in hopes of me not getting into anything scandalous. I definitely guessed wrong. “Yes.”

“Will, what have you gotten yourself into?” Kevin chuckled as he shook his head, chugging another shot of tequila.

“So this is like a werewolf kink?” Dave nodded, still giggling, and obviously a little buzzed.

“Yeah, kinda.”

“And there’s a whole site for it?” Kevin said in amazement. “I feel you would definitely be an omega, Will.” he ruffled my short hair.

Dave crossed his arms. “No thanks, I’ll stay on the Beta side.”

“Suit yourself, man,” Kevin grinned. “I’m definitely an alpha.”

A phone ring snapped us out. Dave held up his finger and answered the call. It was his wife from the looks of his expression as it changed from a drunk guy to sobering up really quick. After a minute, our friend hung up the call and grabbed his jacket.

“Gotta go, guys, wife’s calling me. Same time next month?” Dave smiled.

We both nodded and waved him off as he left through the door. I’m still confused about how I’m going to be dealing with my case. Is this the universe’s way of laughing at me? Like how my marriage ended because I barely touched my wife and kept drowning myself with work? And now I’m thrown into this kinky copyright lawsuit that I have no idea how to even understand mating and heat cycles?

“You look lost, baby girl.” Kevin said.

I snapped out and cringed at the reference. “Oh my god, don’t call me that.” We took a few more shots of the bottle. About half an hour later, we called the server to pick up our tab. Me and Kevin left the bar and walked to the parking lot where our cars were. I was quiet the whole time until we arrived at the black sedan, mine to be exact.

“Hey listen Will,” Kevin said.

I turned to him and saw him rubbing the back of his neck. “If you need someone to talk to, I’m here. You know that, right?”

“Of course, man.” My lips curved into a smile. “I’ll hit you up if I need more help with the omega verse case.”

Kevin looked surprised before laughing, “Of course, your alpha is here to help.”

I felt my cheeks grow hot and roll my eyes, “See you next week, Kevin.” I said and unlocked my car and opened my door. Kevin helped me get in and closed the door for me.

“See you next week, my omega.”

-The end-

#omegaverse #lowkey bl #original story #short story

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elitheaceofalltrades · 2 years ago

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The Almost Gone - Game Review

Note: This review contains spoilers

I got this game in the HumbleBundle Amazing Adventures Bundle. Before this, I'd never heard of it so I went in mostly blind and with not much thoughts or opinions outside of "the art look cute" and "the concept seems cool". So let's get into the review.

The Almost Gone was a pretty short game, it took me approx. 3 hours to play in it's entirety(3 hours exact according to steam). The Game consisted of 5 Acts/Chapters and once you completed a stage, you could not go back.

The Good:

The art was absolutely gorgeous. I loved the art style, the colour palette, everything. The artists can definitely give themselves a pat on the back

The music was another highlight. I'll be honest, I'm a bit of a coward so "eeire instrumental" isn't my usual jam but the music was genuinely beautiful and really helped set the overall vibe of the game

The puzzles were engaging and difficult enough to make you think but not so difficult as to make you throw up your hands and give up. I was slightly worried that 5 chapters of a point and click game might get boring but the puzzle weren't repetitive at all and nothing felt too easy or too hard

I also have to give kudos to the creators for the handling of sensitive topics. Despite dealing with some heavy stuff, nothing was ever graphic so more sensitive games shouldn't have a problem. The most graphic thing was the police car in a tree (shown below), everything else was just inferred.

The Bad:

The ending left a lot of questions unanswered. As we go through the game we piece together the life of the MC, Emily, and her family. While it's expected for there to be some confusion initalliy with these kind of game, you generally assume that by the end you'll have a cohesive idea of what happened. That was not the case in the almost gone. Chapter 1 - 4 gives us the following information:

Chapter 1 set "a moment after" - We start off in Emily's home and we learn about her relationship with her parents and their terrible relationship with each other. It's a bit of a cliche, her parents work too much, they fight all the time, the mother is diagnosed with depression and mixes her meds with alcohol and also filed for divorce and full custody.

Chapter 2 set "an hour after" - We move outside and into the neighbourhood where we learn bits and pieces about the neighbours as well as discover that there was some sort of accident (it's where the cop car in the tree is set). We do not know exactly what happened, we just see the aftermath of it.

Chapter 3 set "30 years before" - We learn backstory about Emily's paternal grandparents. Her grandfather was an architect whose design collapsed, killing 8 people, which led to lawsuits and hatemail. He was also abusive and locked her grandmother and father in the basement. We also learn that her dad was lowkey kind of a psychopath, since we find animal bones in his childhood closet and it was implied that he killed them. One of the clues we discover also happen to be a skeleton key that unlocks all the doors in the grandparent's apartment but also has the pun of actually being made from a bird skeleton, again it's inferred by her father.

Chapter 4 set "one year after" - We learn about Emily's mother and her time at a mental hospital and the horrors endured there by her and the other patients. It is also implied that her mother died at this hospital though nothing graphic is depicted. There is no body or anything, we just enter the morgue to see one of the plaques has her mother's room number on it.

Now all of this was well and good and interesting, however the problem comes with chapter 5. I was expecting chapter 5 to be a conclusion which tied together the story in a neat little bow instead it ended up being more of an epilogue where Emily reaches a tree house her father built for her, lays down in bed and says she wants to sleep and then it cuts to credits. It was great to uncover the mystery of who is emily and what happened to her but instead of getting that "aha" moment where it all comes together you're left with your little notepad of disjointed information. I inferred from the sleep as well as the strikethrough in almost that Emily has now passed on and we were in some weird in between state. However I have seen some others question is we were playing while Emily was in a coma and it ended with her waking up. I disagree since "things ending with a character going to sleep" has always been a metaphor for death but to each his own. So while I can be satisfied that in knowing that Emily died, I spent 3 hours playing a game and I cannot tell you know. We know there was an accident that ended with one police car in a tree, another car on fire and death in the neighbourhood but what exactly caused the accident? why the police were in the area to begin with? what happened? We get no answers what so ever. We also have no idea what happened to her father. There are some videos, threads and posts out there that try to piece together a cohesive narrative of what exactly happened but from the game itself we have no clear answer. I think that in trying to not be too graphic about certain things that the creators ended up being too vague on details and that's why we're left with a lot of questions.

In conclusion? I gave The Almost Gone 3 out of 5 stars. The game was beautiful and interesting but the payoff did not match it's potential and in trying to not be too graphic, the creators ended up being too vague on important parts of the story.

Final Rating:⭐⭐⭐

~Eli

Ace of All Trades, Pro at None😆

Buy me a coffee

#gaming #game review #the almost gone #humblebundle #amazing adventures bundle #spoilers #the almost gone spoilers #point and click #puzzle games #long post #ko fi account #Ace of all Trades

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onceuponymous · 2 years ago

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[TRANSCRIPT]

[Reddit thread on r/redlettermedia, post by u/banananutnightmare]

Theory: Was Jack and Jill (2011) a front to rescue Katie Holmes?

My fellow hack frauds,

It's beyond speculation at this point Adam Sandler produces cheap projects to get his friends paid big money. In the Half in the Bag review of Jack and Jill, Mike observes that in 2011 Katie Holmes isn't seen much outside the tabloids anymore and thinks she was in this film because it was one that her husband Tom Cruise, notoriously controlling, would give his permission to, simply because it would be a fat paycheck.

But why did Adam Sandler choose Katie Holmes? The women who played his partners in his most recent preceding films were Jennifer Aniston and Leslie Mann (both very experienced comedy actors) and Salma Hayek (if you can pay anyone to pretend to be your wife, you cast Salma Hayek, makes sense). The couple of love interests after Katie Holmes were Drew Barrymore and Academy Award Winner Susan Sarandon (both very experienced comedy actors) and Salma Hayek again (Salma Hayek). He's also been friends with Aniston since they were kids and has hired Barrymore repeatedly since she sought him out and begged to work together. It makes sense they're on his list of loyal buddies who make it on the payroll when they want a job.

So why Katie Holmes?

We now know that Katie Holmes secretly, meticulously planned her divorce from Tom Cruise. She had to repeatedly meet with lawyers, secure a secret getaway apartment, bank account, cell phone, to ensure a quick, safe escape with full custody of their daughter. All without him, or the Church of Scientology, suspecting a thing.

As Mike repeatedly points out, Holmes was given "nothing" to do in the film. The job provided her not just money but, maybe it even more importantly provided an alibi. Maybe Jack and Jill was a cover that gave her an excuse to be out on the loose, but also gave her enough free time since she hardly had any lines or need to rehearse real acting, that she could meet with lawyers and plan her escape.

I think Adam Sandler hired Katie Holmes for this reason. This was the last project Holmes would work on before her divorce a few months later. I would even go so far as to suggest he slapped the whole film together specifically as a cover for her.

I also don't think this is the only time he's done something like this. The following year he cast sports reporter Erin Andrews in a small role as a receptionist in That's My Boy (2012).

In 2008 Andrews was stalked by a man named Michael Barrett who filmed naked videos of her through peepholes at a Marriott hotel in Nashville and again at a Radisson in Milwaukee. In 2009 he posted the Marriott video online. She filed lawsuits against Barrett, Marriott, and Radisson. Employees at the hotels told her stalker what room she was in and gave him the room next door, how he was able to film in the first place. When Adam Sandler hired her, she was simultaneously trying to get the video removed from websites, was fired from ESPN for refusing to talk about the incident on air, and was fighting Marriott's army of lawyers in court. (She eventually won her suit and $55mil years later.) A nice paycheck for an easy job would've been a big help, and I don't think there's any other logical explanation for the film to exist, other than to help Erin Andrews when she was in such a desperate situation.

What if all of Adam Sandler's terrible money laundering scheme movies are fronts he tosses together ASAP in order to provide fast help to victimized women?

Is Adam Sandler a secret hero?

[Comment section]

undead_tortoiseX

I choose to believe this just because it would make the world just a little better.

THECapedCaper

Honestly most of hi projects are him just hanging out with his friends while they all collect a steady paycheck. When he's dialed in as a director or actor he really shines, but if he can shit out a 3/10 movie in two weeks to help someone then hey more power to him.

undead_tortoiseX

Right, and it doesn't have to be an either/or decision. He could be running a project just to hangout with his friends while also occasionally casting someone who could desperately need the opportunity in their situation.

Kabe59

He single handedly keeps Rob Schneider fed and well

AsaltGrain

He only does it single-handedly because Schneider bit the other one clean off.

chupathingy99

With all the horrible product placement, you'd need a swarm of lawyers to be on set at all times.

One of them could've been a divorce lawyer. You might be on to something.

JohnnySodapop

I reject reality and substitute this.

bubbasawyer3

I reject your hypothesis!

BlackSpinedPlinketto

I really like this, it's very sweet.

I've been judging him on the content of his movies which was disgusting and sexist. Instead you can tell he's a smart guy who has worked out a formula for success, and used it to furnish his friends with money and nice location jobs.

Jungies

I firmly believe that the only reason Richard "Jaws" Kiel was in Happy Gilmore is because he was old, and in ill-health; and Sandler knew giving him a couple of lines in his movie would re-up his Screen Actor's Guild health insurance.

TL,DR: Adam Sandler's a bastard.

Numitor453

Angela Lansbury did the same thing with Murder, She Wrote

badluckartist

That woman was a fucking angel. Rest in power, you murderous queen.

I choose to incorporate this into my worldview.

#adam sandler #i liked the reblog thread where people talk about #accounts of how in-person sandler is a cool and nice guy #wanted to give a nice clean access to the transcript tho

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nazmulbd00m-blog · 4 months ago

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#IFTTT #Hollywood News - FNNEWZ

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familykanoon · 10 months ago

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Costly Mistakes in High Asset Divorces: What You Need to Know?

Advice from the best divorce lawyers in Gurgaon

Divorce proceedings can be stressful, especially when you hold a huge treasure chest and are on the verge of opting for a high-asset split. Besides all the emotional trauma one faces while seeking a divorce, fair division of assets is another challenge that pops up. Also, there are high chances of making mistakes while filing a divorce due to a lack of knowledge and proper planning. However, a skilled divorce lawyer is crucial in safeguarding your financial interests that involve a high-asset divorce. Read on to find out the common mistakes made by couples while seeking a high-asset divorce.

Freaking Out in the Absence of a Prenup Agreement

Although a prenup agreement outlines the division of assets in case of a divorce and offers a structured plan for the division, not having one does not lead to a disaster. Thus, you should stay strong and not freak out in such a situation. Every state has its own laws and orders in place to ensure a fair division of marital assets in case of a split. Seeking help from a savvy divorce advocate can help devise strategic plans to identify, assess and ensure fair division of assets between the spouse.

Opting for Immediate Lawsuit

High net worth divorces involve a lot of intricacies that deal with multiple properties, assets, investments and businesses. In such a condition, being in a hush-hush to seek litigation can be a wrong move. Lawsuits are time-consuming and expensive at the same time, and this should be sought wisely after careful consideration. Also, this can spoil the relations between spouses. Instead, couples should opt for other techniques, such as arbitration and mediation, for a better team-oriented and controlled mode of division of assets.

Misrepresenting Income and Assets

Splitting finances and dividing property can easily put the couple in a situation to play tug and war ending up in heated arguments and controversies. While hiding assets and manipulating your income may seem like taking a sneaky shortcut to save bucks, it may cost you huge if your partner or their lawyer finds out about it. Not only does such an act raise a concern about your credibility, but it can also impose huge penalties during the lawsuit. Thus, refrain from being hideous about your assets and maintain transparency throughout the divorce process to get a speedy resolution.

Not Hiring a Proficient Divorce Lawyer

While taking the most serious decisions of your life, such as divorce, there may be many family members and other relatives who may come to the forefront to give advice. While there is nothing wrong in taking advice, do not solely rely on their advice even if they have experience in taking divorce. Your financial future after divorce is too precious to gamble with, and you can afford to abide by any Tom, Dick and Harrys advice on such a serious matter. Seek professional help who can guide you through the legal process at every step.

Hire a Law Advocate in Gurgaon Now from Family Kanoon

Are you also someone looking for divorce lawyers in Gurgaon? Family Kanoon offers you a one-stop solution for all your divorce-related representation. Our team has the best divorce advocate in Gurgaon to secure a brighter tomorrow for you. Choose us for your high-asset divorce needs and leave the rest to us as we excel in dealing with the intricacies of such cases. Worried about protecting your assets in a divorce?

Lets talk! Reach out to us to seek personalized legal advice!

#best divorce lawyers in Gurgaon #divorce lawyer in Gurgaon #best divorce advocate in Gurgaon

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sluthunter52 · 23 days ago

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When it was all over, the whore realized there was a lot I could do, which also hurt her a lot. First, I hired my PI to film her adultery for me. He did a great job. Then I filed for divorce and simultaneously filed a $5 million lawsuit against the boss and his company. We reached an out-of-court settlement for $3 million after my divorce! Now the whore is a divorced slut, her lover doesn't want anything to do with her anymore, and I have a nice sum of money that will enable me to do a lot of things!

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nityarawal · 2 years ago

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Dr. Kazi-

I'd like to see Dr. below.

I was excited to do phone consult w/ Dr. Lamb but then office switched my Thurs appointment to Schwartz in person tomorrow.

They don't seem to care about my need after hours of schedule on health retreat.

I'd prefer to see a female Dr in Encinitas near my kids who can present my whole panel of results responsibly on 7 years of foul play.

All Dr's need to collaborate and settle nonsense.

I feel like a lab rat. A proto type for AI.

Popular belief is ivermectin & hydrochloriquine for Covid warfare abuse.

When will Dr's catch up?

Hopefully before I die! Lol

Feed stores beckon!(:

9/11 warfare needs to stop on Tehrangeles folks.

This has been insanely abusive with 7 years of IEHP slander/smears after Blue Shield losing class action lawsuits! You're the only Dr. I trust and we are Weary to give jaded receptionists or nurses access to my files again.

Melody had to turn in her nurse mom on hippa violations at probate court and judge says we need to have a restraining order from these grandma's stealing children to offer sexually to their own boy toys- as pimps. It's a history of molesting kids for several generations upheld by court pimps!

There's been major hippa violations at IEHP selling civilians to court and state hospitals. Moms feel all these establishments need to close down. Fibrocystic breasts is not high cholesterol or a cyst in brain.

You're not addressing 7 years of terrorism. Urgent need for divorce dissolution, kids & my normal income/homes.

We need letters to stop abuse.

Let courts know what they've done- not only to my perfect physiology- but 4 billion other moms and their kids globally.

This is an Apartheid of genocide when Dr's don't listen- we don't want to be raped, drugged or gagged by cheaters.

No it was not good for my bloodtype -ab moms practicing medicine. Nor any other.

We haven't seen IEHP charged for mass in house Sheriff assisted fentanyl murders nor robberies and sexual assaults on children.

We found CPS and over 50 million social workers complicit in largest genocide and sexual assault in history.

Now Israel bombs globe because over a million Jewish attys comitted foul play.

We don't know how many of our judges and attys on panel died in Israel but all are Sanctioned on foul play.

Court has a severe parent alienation disease and we can't accommodate their Addictions to porn or invitro.

It's not healthy.

TG we're seeing other Middle Eastern leaders and fathers take a stand for moms.

Grateful!

Blessings,

Nitya

---------- Forwarded message ---------

From: Mashal Rasul <[email protected]>

Date: Fri, Oct 20, 2023, 4:49 PM

Subject: Referral

To: [email protected] <[email protected]>

Hi Nitya,

Can you please reach out to your referring physician's office and have them fax the referral to us.

United Medical Doctors - Gastroenterology

477 N El Camino Real

Encinitas, CA

Phone: 760 436 8881

Fax: 760 230 1092

Thank you,

Mashal Rasul,

Office Schedule: Mon-Fri 8-5:00PM

United Care Medical Assistant

477 N. El Camino Real, Ste. A308, Encinitas, CA 92024

Office Phone# 760-436-8881

Office Fax# 760-230-1092

[email protected]

Confidentiality Note: This e-mail, including any attachments, contains information that may be confidential or privileged. The information is intended to be for the use of the individual or entity named above. If you are not the intended recipient, be aware that any disclosure, copying, distribution, or use of the contents is prohibited. If you have received this e-mail in error, please notify the sender immediately by a ‘reply to sender only’ message and destroy all electronic and hard copies of the communication, including attachments.

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expromqueen · 3 years ago

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“Wah! The jd trial was supposed to prove that men can be victims at the hands of women but now all these abusive men are coming out and suing their victims for some reason!” Not to be a cunt but the reason all these abusers are lawyering up is specifically because depp is an abuser and not a victim. They saw on live television that no matter how much evidence this woman had that she had been abused, a court still ruled that she was wrong for talking about it and decided she has to pay over double their divorce settlement. They saw a man just like them publicly humiliate his victim and get away with it. THATS why they’re filing lawsuits and that’s exactly what we said would happen.

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thesmutgoddess · 3 years ago

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Babes, I think for now it is time to accept defeat. I have won the battle on tumblr but I have lost the war. The MRAs, the Fangirls, the Russian Bots... their hold on Twitter and Reddit is simply too strong. I am weary and tired. My fingers hurt. I've developed brain damage from trying to argue their logic and explain simple physics. For every debatelord on reddit I've argued into deletion another middle-aged man's divorce is finalized and emerges to take their place. Like playing a never ending game of whack-a-mole. Johnny Depp joked about "shooting two negros" and migendered Amber Heard's friend on the stand. The Leftist Zoomers did not turn against him. For now the man is impregnable and uncancellable. I shall retreat and regenerate. Build alliances and strategize. Have no doubt! Johnny Depp will expend all of his resources. When he files for bankruptcy, from lost lawsuits, lawyer fees, a 20k wine habit and shooting literary icons out of cannon balls. When he is no longer able to buy russian bots and payroll his enablers. We Johnny Depp truthers will emerge stronger then before and the truth will prevail!

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coochiequeens · 2 years ago

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Wonder why his ex-wife felt the need to keep her pregnancy a secret and why the help she received in ending the pregnancy “meant the world to her”

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2023/03/10/texas-abortion-lawsuit/

A Texas man has filed a wrongful-death lawsuit against three women who allegedly helped his ex-wife obtain abortion pills and terminate her pregnancy, in the first case of its kind to be brought since the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade.

The lawsuit could signal a new phase in antiabortion strategy, with conservatives scrambling to crack down on growing abortion pill networks that have helped pregnant people access medication abortion in states where the procedure is banned.

The plaintiff, Marcus Silva, is represented by Jonathan Mitchell, a conservative lawyer who was the architect of a novel 2021 Texas abortion ban, and Briscoe Cain, a Republican member of the Texas House. The lawsuit states that helping someone obtain an abortion qualifies as murder under the state’s pre-Roe abortion ban that took effect this summer, allowing Silva to sue under the wrongful-death statute.

Silva’s civil case could result in the women being forced to pay over $1 million in damages. The district attorney in Galveston, Tex., will decide separately whether to charge the women in criminal court.

Silva alleged that in July 2022, when the couple were still married, his wife became pregnant but concealed it from him.

Two of the defendants allegedly exchanged text messages with Silva’s wife, discussing how and where she could obtain the medication to cause an abortion. A third defendant arranged for the delivery of the medication, the complaint alleged.

“We have pills here in Houston,” read a message that one of the women shared with the group, according to the complaint. “So no you wouldn’t have to fly. You could get them from us or your could order some online.”

Abortion is now banned or under threat in these states

As the person seeking the abortion, Silva’s ex-wife is exempt from civil and criminal liability, the complaint notes, and Silva is not pursuing any claims against her. The couple divorced last month, according to the court document. None of the three women named as defendants, or their lawyers, could be reached for comment on the accusations.

The complaint said Silva also intends to sue the manufacturer of the mifepristone pill allegedly used in the abortion if that information is made available in discovery.

“Anyone involved in distributing or manufacturing abortion pills will be sued into oblivion,” Cain, one of Silva’s lawyers, wrote in a news release. “That includes CVS and Walgreens if their abortion pills find their way into our state.”

Since the June Supreme Court decision, abortion rights activists have ramped up efforts to ship abortion pills — a two-step regimen of mifepristone and misoprostol that is widely regarded as safe — into states with strict new bans, violating the bans as they work with rapidly expanding international suppliers as well as U.S.-based distributors.

The Texas judge who could take down the abortion pill

These growing pill pipelines have presented a major challenge for the antiabortion movement. Many prosecutors don’t want to charge people for abortion-related crimes, while others have struggled to find cases.

Abortion pills are usually sent to pregnant people through the mail, making their distribution hard to track. Prosecutors are also limited to bringing charges against people who help facilitate the abortion, with abortion bans currently in effect exempting people seeking abortions from criminal prosecution or legal liability.

Texas has emerged as a hot spot for novel approaches to restrict access to abortion pills. U.S. District Judge Matthew Kacsmaryk, based in Amarillo, could soon rule on a lawsuit filed by antiabortion groups against the Food and Drug Administration that could take mifepristone off the market, a ruling with the potential to upend abortion access nationwide.

Antiabortion groups within the state have also begun their own investigative efforts. Texas Right to Life has created a team of advocates assigned to gather information on citizens who might be distributing abortion pills illegally.

Silva’s complaint includes as exhibits many of the text messages allegedly exchanged among the group of women. In the texts, one person shares information provided by an organization that ships pills that cause abortions and says the woman can take them at her home.

“Your help means the world to me,” responds a woman identified in the complaint as Silva’s ex-wife.

The texts also show discussions about the date of the woman’s last period, what the medication abortion will feel like and when she is planning to take the pills.

#USA #Texas #reproductive justice

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realhousewives-fan · 2 years ago

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Darby Filed Lawsuit Against Candiace

RHOP is finally over and done with, but their drama is far from over.

Michael Darby has crawl out from whatever whole he has been hiding at in the mountains of Mordor and filed a lawsuit against Candiace Dillard Bassett.

Michael hasn’t been present around the cameras this season as he is now divorcing Ashley Darby.

What a snore that storyline was. Nothing makes any sense. But it never does with the Darbys.

But apparently, he had a problem with what Candiace said about him this season.

Gizelle Bryant and Ashley had decided to ruin Chris Bassett this season.

When Ashley asked her if she was willingly overlooking the red flags, Candiace’s response was: “You would know.”

As we all know, Ashley’s soon to be ex-husband has been a handful throughout the seasons. Literally.

She confronted Ashley about Michael allegedly paying a man for sexual favours.

(And yes, I heard Whitney Rose’s voice inside my head when I wrote that.)

So what else is new?

He has allegedly cheated numerous times, grabbed a cameraman’s butt, and admitted that he wanted to suck Juan Dixon’s sausage.

But he has sent Candiace a cease and desist and sued her for 2 million dollars for defamation over this comment.

According to Carlos King the husbands has signed an agreement where it says that they cannot sue each other for defamation.

According to Kempire, Michael is petty enough to do anything, and he has supposedly the means to see this through all the way to the courthouse.

Yes, the Darbys are about to file for a divorce, but according to Carlos King, Michael has signed an agreement with Bravo multiple times.

So, it doesn’t seem like this lawsuit will go anywhere and doesn’t really serve any other purpose than preventing this story from continuing.

Nobody was talking about this until he filed this lawsuit, though… I would say that is a little counterproductive, but I guess this is his way of saying:

“No, that’s not true.”

And it’s a dick move. Say what you want about Chris, but he didn’t sue the other ladies.

#Real Housewives of Potomac #RHOP #Michael Darby #Candiace Dillard #Gizelle Bryant #Ashley Darby #Chris Bassett #Whitney Rose #RHOSLC #Juan Dixon

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hostilemuppet · 1 year ago

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PART FIVE (first batch where we decided CWs might be necessary: discussions of non comedic abuse, mentions of grooming, spread of comedic STIs)

val (part 2): previously known solely for being the victim of barbs frequent transphobia, val (they/them) is actually incredibly fucking racist against all non-rock trolls. they were always like this but it was only after they received the internets pity during the barb situation that they allowed themselves to let loose and "stop being so PC all the time". they hate hinterland trolls the most bc they have no native land and are thus inherently immigrants no matter where they currently reside. val goes after the kpop trolls and, after getting called a flop, get doxxed. they now have to go live with their mum (val didnt know their parents divorced bc they never answer their phone when their mum or dad call) who has remarried to trollzart (val knew that trollzart married a random rock troll but didnt know it was ms thundershock (her ex husband took her last name) bc they never call their parents and they threw out the wedding invite bc they assume all letters are junk mail)

cliva: after a solid month of clay mooching off branch, he and viva get back together with a long night of very freaky sex. which viva records (without his knowledge) for blackmail in case he ever tries to cross her again. which, yknow, we obviously dont CONDONE revenge porn, but he kinda brought it on himself. she keeps it on display as a video tape (not that she doesnt have the video file on the cloud. you think shes a fucking luddite?) in a glass case in their mansion and its clays responsibility to come up with an excuse for why they still have a VHS in 2024 whenever they have visitors. viva keeps him on a tight leash (very literally, if you watch the video). while initially a level of comedic toxicity expected from the precedent fleek set, it quickly grew into a genuine fucked up abusive relationship and, i cant believe im saying this, clay is the victim. hes not allowed to make eye contact with non-related trolls or use his credit cards without permission (he has a set amount of cash he can use per week. floyd and jd think its hilarious hes a grown man with an allowance. bruce and branch think its horrifying hes a grown man with an allowance). if and when she releases the video she plans to tell people that he paid her to do whatever it is they did in the tape (which changes on every description. so far we know there was a rubber chicken, a penny farthing, and a pillow case full of strawberry jam). clay cant ask bruce for help bc hes still mad at him for almost ruining his marriage (brandy immediately forgave bruce once she found out it was clay and theyre currently planning their newest romantic trip) and he cant ask branch bc thats his adorable innocent baby sibling and, even though floyd has experience with sex tape leakage, he cant ask floyd bc hes still floyd, so hes left with no other options. he has to ask jd for help and pretend he doesnt want to rip those dumbass goggles off his head and shove em through his entire digestive system (either way). unfortunately, jd has been in this exact scenario before, and is willing to help

jd: dont worry bro, ive got experience dealing with sticky situations involving a ham sandwich, jump rope and three rolls of toilet paper clay: and the fa- jd: and the fancy silverware set from the 1800s yes

unbeknownst to clay, viva deliberately stopped taking her birth control to use the baby as leverage in any future lawsuit. shes got an egg growing as we speak. she doesnt see the problem in having a baby to get the upper hand in a failing marriage bc thats how poppy was made.

marshtato mary: twitter reply guy meme gimmick account ala kirawontmiss or wokey d pronouns whos known for being a piece of shit and almost universally hated for her stolen overused jokes and reposted memes. shes blatantly fatphobic to random people as a "dunk" and when she goes """"too far"""" she simply deletes the tweet and says nothing. she claims theres multiple people running the account (theres not). people notice shes gone from "generic normie memes" to "grey hair and pronouns" so they go through her following and discover she follows barb.

harper: infamous twitter artist who went to art school and instantly degraded from "interesting art" to "generic horny caricature-esque slop". draws barb like the kingpin from spiderverse. gets into her first controversy when she draws brozone fanart bc she is "so hyped for their newest album!!!". most of the brothers are drawn normally (although floyd might be a bit too... demure. but he tends to go that route for brozone stuff anyway) except bruce who is drawn with a skinny hourglass figure and long eyelashes. bruce usually doesnt care (or know about) fandom drama but floyd thinks he should know about this one, and hes so shocked that hes dealing with this again after living almost 30 years as a man that he logs into @/brobruceofficial (clay never changed the password) and replies "what the hell is this" before hitting back 3 shots of whiskey and doing some thinking. harper says "what, trans guys cant be feminine? 🙄" and bruce says "but im NOT???".

bruce sits up in bed (he has his own separate tiny bed on the nightstand bc otherwise brandy would roll over and crush him in her sleep) bruce: honey im........ im masc, right? brandy: *looks at the barbie doll bed* sure sweetie.

harper finally deletes her account after getting called out for morally reprehensible kink art, and bruce is indignant that that was the final straw and not drawing fetishistic softcore porn of him (floyd and poppy say he'll get used to it). harper later tries to come back to twitter under a different name. she pretends to be a kpop troll. she doesnt speak korean.

clay (part 3): when we last left off, clay, after swallowing his pride, asked jd for help with the sex-tape-abusive-relationship-situation. jd says he should give her cooties and clay threatens to smash the few non-plastic plates jd owns. jd lets clay stay over in rhonda for a few days, and he calls viva himself to tell her that brozone are having a "group lyric writing sesh to prep for our next album. no, uh, not the one releasing in a week, the next one. its called being married to the grind, viva. dont call." after a couple days clay tells jd its been nice not having someone breathing down his neck, judging his every move, telling him what he can and cant do, can and cant wear, can and cant eat. jd says that viva must be a real monster. clay stares him dead in the eyes without saying anything. jd says he has to go get groceries.

delta dawn: very famous for country trolls but not a lot of reach outside, which she is completely fine with, until one day jdtwt find an 18-22 y/o photo of him with a "random unnamed centaur lady" and try to track her down bc they are crazy people. over night deltas spotify monthly listens surpass the estimated population of lonesome flats by a huge margin, and her initial glee that music really is uniting them all is immediately squashed when she checks twitter (her follower count quintupled) and realises that the one night stand she had roughly 18-22 years ago has once again bitten her in the ass. shes instantly reduced to an extension of jd, and do you KNOW how hard it is to make it as a female country musician? its pretty goddamn hard. she "has her people call jds people" and they meet up in an unpopulated area of lonesome flats. delta asks what the hell is going on, and jd laughs and admits his fans can get overzealous sometimes, so delta slaps him and tells him he should feel lucky she didnt kick him somewhere sensitive. she tells him theres one more reason she wanted to see him, that theres someone she wants him to meet, and holly walks in. holly didnt initially understand the situation so the first thing she said was he should really clean up more. jd DID actually understand the situation immediately, and instantly went in for a hug, so holly pepper sprayed him.

holly: is this it? are you selling me to a boyband??? like what i read about???????? delta: what- no. no, sugar. i dont think he could afford you anyway jd: i totally could- delta: hit him again, hon.

turns out that one night stand 18-22 years ago resulted in holly darling. jd is thrilled about being a father. holly does some digging into who jd is and learns very little except lesbians seem to love him (in a hamster sort of way) and she really wishes her estranged father remained estranged. jd and delta dont exactly rekindle their relationship so to speak, but they do become awb (acquaintances with benefits), which is a fancy way of saying "jd isnt allowed to text her but when delta is bored and sexually frustrated she just has to say the word and he comes running". he gives her cooties and she puts him in the hospital

velvet (part 2): crimp gets cancelled for roblox roleplaying with tiny (who she thinks is 14 (he is actually 1)) who took screenshots the second it got uncomfortable and made his own expose video set to a song from a cutesy slice of life anime where he added captions in windows movie maker detailing the allegations. she immediately deleted her account without any fanfare. velvet talks about how she "never liked her anyway" and inadvertently exposes the extent of the workplace abuse. velvets reputation was already in the gutter as it was but now shes chilling with a bunch of sewer rats. the "this might strike some viewers as harsh, but i believe everyone involved in this story should die" meme gets a lot of use that week.

smidge (part 2): the timeline is as such; she is seen with poppy and rumours start about her being her rebound; people find out about milton moss a week later, quickly assume that smidge is (consensually) cucking him; barb gets blackout drunk and calls him a pedophile bc smidge is short bc she wants anyone even halfway related to anyone dating poppy to die; smidge tells her off; smidgetwt 🔛🔝. smidge quickly realises she can make a pretty penny from people who are unhealthily obsessed with #smoppy. she releases hoodies (plain white, with two crudely drawn ms paint stoutberries, one yellow one pink) and fans say that is their stealth coming out. several fans ask if this is queerbaiting and, as they get dogpiled, smidge tweets on priv "hold on i gotta look something up" and 13 minutes later replies "okay yeah that is what im doing" (she is not going to stop).

bridget: this months #ladyglittersparklestwtselfieday happened to coincide with classical trolls having important twitter discussions about anti-classical discrimination (spurred on by val, of course) and classical trolls say something along the lines of "this is why no one likes bztwt, youre always talking over important issues" ignoring how

it wasnt bztwt

ladyglittersparklestwtselfieday has been every 15th for 4 months now, and

its twitter

dante angrily rants about how #ladyglittersparklestwtselfieday is trending and says everyone posting selfies is ugly. bridget, who has no idea what is going on, qrts with "thats not nice, my fans are beautiful 😊" and classical trolls are MADDDDDD

diamonds (part 2): tiny (on his trollex stan account) admits he is actually 1 year old instead of 14 and everyone thinks hes doing a bit. he says he is tiny diamond from that famous family vlog channel and gets in trouble for "laughing at a real infant being exploited". he posts a selfie as proof but gets mass reported and ends up losing 62k twitter followers. he cries to his daddy about it

guy: didnt i ban you from social media? tiny: well Clearly you didnt do a very good job, did you?

this lands guy in hot water for "letting his son get groomed". he makes a joke along the lines of "the only time i let him get groomed is when i take him to get his hair styled" and people do nooooooooot like that one 😬. cj, priscilla and keith (all approx 13) were tinys mutuals and are betrayed at the revelation. tinys last tweet is "sorry oomfs" before they softblock him bc they all have "dni if under 10" in their bios. priscilla (pfp: cunty fluttershy with filters) tries to get clout by cancelling him post-suspension but its something really dumb like "he was proship (source: he ships squidbob (spongebob is minor coded))" and all the qrts that arent making fun of her for the nonsense tweet is some variation of "preschooltwt is heating up 🔥"

branch and poppy (part 2): branch sees all the smoppy and starts to think that it's real (he and poppy havent had sex in 5 days, which is the longest theyve ever gone without one of them being on tour (during which they zoom every other night. it's why branch has to have his own separate tour bus)). branch once again drinks his feelings and declines jds invitation to join him doing the same. branch publicly tweets “@/therealsmidgeNA HOMEWRECKERRRRRRRR” which is taken as confirmation that smidge and poppy are together for realsies.

poppy checks up on him via text poppy: branchifer What is going on branch: why dont you ask smidge since you clearly like her more than me branch: sorry *smidgifer (poppy sends an emoji combo that properly conveys “i am still concerned for your emotional well-being but i dont appreciate the way you are treating me right now. i will give you some time to cool off and we will discuss this later. i love you") branch (cant find the middle finger emoji in his drunken state):👆 poppy: im glad we agree ❤

after branch sobers up the next morning, they talk things out. they decide to go public with their relationship (again) and before poppy can stop him he tweets out "i dont care if you guys make porn of me and poppy anymore, as long as its Only me and poppy. no smidge. no creek. no other rumoured-or-confirmed ex romantic interests of either of us. just me. just poppy. broppy on top." their date nights (most nights) now regularly involve them reading the newest broppy fics on troll ao3. poppy even shows branch the nsfw twitter art tag, which he didnt know was a thing, but she sure has for the longest time. happy ending to the broppy saga.

Brozone (and friends (and enemies)) twitter drama au

Collaborative between me and @squirrelpatties. Truly our magnum opus

Jd: previously a frequent twitter e-clown infamous for name searching and starting beef with people who insulted him. His fanbase thought it was hilarious in a "grandpa escaped the hospital" way. Eventually was forced to relinquish control of @/brojohndoryofficial to his pr manager (clay) after he responded to 14 y/o @/j0ndryballzweat.

Floyd (part 1): his sex tape (with a fan he didnt know was a fan but thats hardly relevant) gets leaked. For the first three days everyone's timeline was full of "do NOT share it around, dont even look for it, if someone sends it to you IGNORE it, this is a disgusting breach of privacy" until Floyd addresses it by tweeting "decided to put on a different kind of show for you guys" and all hell breaks loose. Every tweets hidden replies are full of screencaps and reuploads for a month. People edit the video so just before anything explicit happens it's replaced by a video game cutscene or meme, which Floyd retweets a lot of. His brothers ask him to stop (both for publicity and bc it makes them uncomfortable) so he starts posting thirst traps on insta. Clay yells at him so Floyd tweets "clay just asked when I'm gonna get a girlfriend :/" which brings us to-

Clay: homophobia allegations. Admittedly the least serious and would have blown over quickly if it weren't for him panic tweeting "I'm not homophobic! My girlfriend is a bi lesbian!" People were NOT happy. It takes him three days of retweeting 'helpful educational threads and carrds' on lesbianism written by 14 y/os for people to get off his back. Viva understands.

Bruce: stays off social media bc its the mind killer so he lets clay take care of @/brobruceofficial. This goes well until clay gets drunk and thinks he's on his private account but is actually on Bruce's public. When he wakes up (hungover) in the morning hes got Bruce banging on his door asking why TMZ is reporting on him cheating on his wife. Bruce tells him to clear things up but clay JUST got the lesbians off his back and can't afford to be back in the hotseat...

Branch and poppy: branch was annoyed by all the branch/poppy rpf fanfic (poppy likes them bc she thinks they're cute and funny. When brozone go on tour she reads the smutty ones) so he suggested to poppy that they stage a fake breakup. Poppy is initially against the idea until branch brings up how much fun itd be to sneak around like a couple of teenagers. Poppy scrapbooks the tabloids about their breakup. Clay and Bruce blame clays drunken tweets on branch so clay seems like the victim. Poppy acknowledges this on twitter in a way that very heavily implies they broke up bc branch was cheating on her with her own sister. Viva does not understand. This one doesn't have a resolution yet bc we moved onto:

Barb: previous lesbian icon turned reactionary transphobe. Riff stopped associating with her once she started getting really public with it and now she keeps tweeting stuff like "you-know-who left me just to work with misogynists. Really makes you think 🤔 " which he ignores.

Riff: while still working with barb he was approached to collab with creek (damage control for the... unsavoury things he said about rock trolls). The second the song released he tweeted "wow that guy was an asshole LOL" bc he didn't realise he wasn't supposed to do that. Cut contact with barb once her transphobia went from "mild, I can fix her" to "jesus fucking christ". Briefly worked with Floyd until his second controversy at which point riff tweeted "cmon, man" and turned off his phone. Riff hasn't done anything wrong and he deserves a lot better

Velvet: crafted the perfect expose thread on Floyd when she was in prison, including "pro life" "publicly sharing inappropriate sexual content" and "uses the toothpaste flag". Posts it the second she gets let out of prison and instantly becomes #1 on trending (alongside "floyd" "pro life" and "#HUGS4CLAY).

Floyd (part 2): tweets "why does it even matter that I'm pro life if I'm gay and don't 'believe' in 'voting'" before doing another line off his boyfriends torso. People bring his leaked nudes back up and start insulting his dick size and its the first time hes ever let a controversy bother him. His next tweet is "I am not ashamed of my body" and the top reply (creek pfp) is "you should be ❤". Clay is biting the skin off his own tongue.

#rb #twitter drama au

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