#[theres lots and lots missing but he's also a complicated character sometimes!!]

[the-leyline-directory]

Yo let's fight that social phobia and share some bulletpoint information about Silvaire x Krile ship!!!! (and other sil info that is important to the context)

While they are a romantic ship; they do not 'get together' in any capacity (Or even acknowledge said feelings) until mid or post Dawntrail! Before that point is complicated due to Mephistopheles [Voidsent/Sins of Promathia of Silvaire] leaving him unable to allow that reciprocation or understanding.

As they meet during the 'Mephistopheles' arc, Silvaire is not a functional person in a moral sense. He is a villain character who is working with his own agenda in mind, often lying to the scions just to see how they'll deal with MSQ events [Such as he could have warned them about Ascian dealings or many things that caused NPC deaths but chose not too just to see the emotional damage it would bring due to that voidsent/Apathy affliction] ;; Krile however, due to her Echo of knowing Intent, is the first and only person who is capable of calling his lies as they are, this makes him avoid her for a good while.

Silvaire is not a source native, and thus he has a Shard Equivalent; and it is the death of that shard that he takes that 'light' into himself and this is what starts the rebalancing of his moral compass to be a person again. This catalyst event is Haurchefant \o/ Changing his balance from 50%, to 57% (8 times rejoined). Paired with the emotional weight of Haurchefant's code and similarity to Silvaire's original untainted self, this changes his actions onward! (This is a drastically important point but I am so scared to say so cause of how [understandably] important Haurchefant is to the community as a whole!)

Assisting with the Warring Triad, he becomes properly introduced to Krile and she to him in turn - though she keeps her peace about his half truths and guarded speech around her. She can tell that something is up, but he has no direct malicious intent towards the WoL and can indeed be claimed an ally.

During the events of Stormblood, he has a great deal of problems due to the history of Garlemald and his part in what is happening - faced to face with the direct consiqences as his actions when he was The Hound. This goes as far as some of the older resistance members half-recognize him but don't belive this 'Elezen with the WoL' could be that Garlean monster. Krile works to try and ask small questions to him as she can tell there is an obvious hurt there (a feeling that is relatively newly unearthed from his slow rebalancing) - though Silvaire pushes these worries aside and lies to her directly constantly; these lies however are spoken with the Light in his core hiding the truth beneath them, as he deep down wants to admit to it all, and to be real again. Krile doesn't understand without the full context but she takes what information she can glean and doesn't condemn that which she doesn't know, offering him advice here and there to try and get closer to other people.

Despite the one 'ally' he has being kidnapped within Stormblood, Silvaire(More accurate Mephistopheles) buries any empathy or desire to help her. A punishment to himself for his light's attempts to open up to her; as all of these things were in part his doing. However, when the opportunities arise, he cannot stop himself from freely offering information to help the Scions if it would lead to the return of her. This again becomes a loop from those Sins to reprimand those good actions.

While not doing a play-by-play sorry! ;; The times before Shadowbringers are spent in closer company, as Silvaire stops wandering/leaving as often as that sense of longed companionship has taken hold and the Light cannot let it go. Still he lies, and he holds his tongue when he could help, but it is during these slower moments that he becomes closer to the Scions more personally - but most so Krile, who often finds conversations with him to be enlightening to his true personality; as pieces here and there when that Light escapes she can feel are real, he's not always coated with lies - though each of those new truths are covered in a dark sorrow that - occasionally - causes her to step back from him, and he from her in turn. This small back-and-forth of dynamic grows more constant, as both take small steps to open communication.

Small excerpt from this point of time is here! It's a short [for my writing] example!

During the events of Shadowbringers, Silvaire does go to the First; and while there Emet-Selch reveals all the lies, half truths, and actual voidsent affliction thus losing all trust from the Scions, with only the WoL keeping that olive branch at the time. From the depths of 'self' Silvaire now possesses, he actually feels this loss and works the best he can to try and salvage anything of the relationships, but in some cases it's too much to ask - and his 'future with them' is put on hold to deal with the issues at hand. (Thus is [Arc - Guilt] and a character shift \o/)

While Krile was not there for those events, she learns of them once everyone returns and for a short while feels the same sense of bitter betrayal, but knowing the small pieces of the puzzle he'd been giving her for the last two/three years, she doesn't condemn him out the gate and is tentative in her own olive branch alongside the WoL. The conversations they have now are far more pointed, and she is less inclined to let him give a half-answer, but he is less trying to do so; apologizing when the darker habits take him, and correcting himself or offering a different answer.

By this point they are not 'romantic' or even 'shipped' ; always circling around 'friendship' - and it's only now at the start of Endwalker that Silvaire - that original self - tries to build back that lost trust as the isolation of the voidsent still clings to his soul. He spends his time with the WoL, or Krile, working through actions over words to show these feelings. He takes Thancred's earned hostility in stride, and Urianger's avoidance as truth. He finally has the room from forced honesty and the slow overtaking of 'light' to want to be better.

As this is getting long (and a dear friend of mine isn't yet finished Endwalker and I know he'll read this!) I shortform that during those events it's a HELL of alot of emotional growth and attempts as such, with a specific event causing that dark to speak too loudly as the question posed is too real for someone like him to ignore and it's only through the support of those nurtured relationships that Silvaire survives in the end.

And since Dawntrail is still no-talking! Short hand for that is 'Yay! He's a person again!! He's somewhat open and communicative and doesn't hide his non-source-born-accent anymore! He speaks in a dead language on habit for prayer that no one else follows, and he spends the first half of the expansion doing all the 'side quests' with Krile! Lots of bonding and emotional development!! He goes to Tural purely with the intent to help Krile with her own journey of discovery as she did for him, to support her no matter what. The second half.... Well I can't talk about that yet! It's a banger developments though!!! By the end of Dawntrail the two of them have come to admit to feelings and the importance the other holds, Silvaire himself most of all, devoted to the core.

I'll update this later in a few weeks for Dawntrail info cause that's where all the good stuff is! but it IS interconnected to MSQ/Some changes to MSQ! So I literally can't talk about it yet!!

[fictionfixations]

Summary of Riddle Rosehearts' Vignettes

(referencing the wiki pages of the vignettes)

(so far. im doing this because i like riddle. also because i have a long term goal of reading every vignette. also because some people are still missing vignettes because of recent birthdays or events. theres the stich event going on right now, and i have his card, but i havent started the event yet 😭)

(..ill also quote parts of the vignette if im not sure how to describe it without it giving off the wrong idea, or unsure how to reword it)

(if there are any typos im sorry)

(...you ever type it down and then accidentally delete it before saving. AGHH)

(if I put the wrong character name anywhere im so sorry)

(theres also an overuse of character names but sometimes you really cant tell whose speaking unless clarified and i cant be bothered to be like 'the [dorm] housewarden' or anything like that so just. names. thats it.

Dorm Uniform - Only the Garden Roses

(I'm sharing the relevant hashtags to you in case you want to use it for something.)

(Part 1) --HEARTSLABYUL DORM - LOUNGE-- Cater's having trouble memorizing spell formulas. There's a practical magic exam next week, and Trey tells him that if he fails it, he could fail the class. Riddle stumbles on the two of them and asks them to explain what happened. Trey informs him, while Cater's jokingly annoyed at him spilling the beans. Riddle questions Cater if he's doing that badly but Cater assures him that it's just that one course, much to Riddle's displeasure regardless. The thing Cater's having trouble over is "autocleaning via implement magic infusion", or "the spell to get brooms and dustcloths to clean a room automatically" as described by Riddle. The housewarden himself hasn't learned it in class, but he's read it in a book.

It's confusing to Cater because it's all about a process where you have to do it exactly right or it fails, which is tripping him up. Trey agrees with him by talking about everything else you'd have to worry about so it wouldn't ruin something instead.

Riddle brings up that Cater's signature spell (copying himself) is complicated (as in probably something difficult to do), and then asks why he's struggling.

Cater clarifies that he's good at multitasking, but when it comes to having to line up everything beforehand, it's tough.

Riddle understands, and then offers to help him study. Trey questions if he's up for it since it's junior-level homework, but Riddle brushes him off by stating how he's the housewarden (and thus should have the ability to help anyone of any year), and he refuses to let anyone drop out or fail a grade.

--LIBRARY-- Riddle and Deuce bump into each other in the library. Deuce is startled at how many grimoires are around Riddle (20, and are pretty big), questioning if he's going to read them all, to which Riddle responds that he will.

He then clarifies that he's compiling a study guide for Cater, and that it's all for note-taking.

Deuce offers to carry the books to the desk, and Riddle thanks him.

(Part Two)

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - HALLWAY--

Riddle's angry at Cater, yelling at him to explain why he can't memorize a simple 300-paged textbook. Cater meanwhile explains that he can't just memorize it in "like one or two days", clarifying as well that each page is filled to the brim with tiny text.

Trey tells Riddle to "use our indoor voice", and Riddle apologizes.

He continues on with how the study guide contains quite literally everything Cater'd need in relation to the test. "Fundamentals, applications, trick questions… The solution to every possible challenge can be found within these 300 pages."

And then says, "Just memorize the entire thing!"

Cater starts off with appreciating that Riddle put a lot of work into it, and he does wish he could remember it all, but that it's difficult for him because he keeps getting sleepy by the time he hits the third page.

Riddle gets ticked off because he hadn't even gotten past the Table of Contents.

Trey tries to calm him down, and then tells Cater that he could try reading it out loud, putting emphasis on the fact that Riddle put a lot of effort into it, and Cater's apologetic, and says he's gonna "hit the books hard, starting today!"

Riddle reminds him of the consequences of failing, and Cater acknowledges it, before snapping a quick picture of the study guide for Magicam. He leaves to do a "cram sesh" in his room.

Riddle disapproves of Cater's constant checking of Magicam, while Trey says that he can understand the desire to distract yourself from doing something you don't want to do.

Trey then goes about helping Riddle understand Cater by asking Riddle what he'd do if he had to eat something he hated.

Riddle responds by saying that he'd change his approach to "make it as edible as I could manage", going through a whole strategy of what he'd do, before he then gets an idea of what to do for Cater.

It ends with Riddle asking Trey to teach him something.

(Part Three)

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - ROSE MAZE--

Cater gives up on taking a break from Magicam and takes a morning stroll, stumbling into Riddle.

Cater tries to make up excuses, while Riddle then mentions that he made a Magicam account the day prior. Cater's surprised, and Riddle questions if he has an issue with it, to which Cater says he doesn't. He continues on to explain that Riddle had stated before that he had no interest in making an account.

Riddle asks for his Magicam handle, to which Cater eagerly shares. Riddle advises him to check it every day, and that he "won't want to miss any of my posts."

--CLASSROOM--

Cater's phone notifies him of a post by Riddle. It's a photo of a broom, with the description, #1stThings1st #WhenCastingASpell #Tap4RoomCornersWithBroom #LevitationSpell #SageAndSalt"

He comments to himself about how cute it is that Riddle's "tagging like a newbie".

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - CATER'S ROOM--

Riddle's made another post, this time about a dustcloth. "#AfterBroom #MagestoneInBucketOfWater #5DropOfPurificationPotion #WaterTemp20OrLess #KeepItThere!"

Cater notes how there's starting to be a pattern.

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - RIDDLE'S ROOM--

Riddle's talking to himself about the next post, that being of a spell formula for brushing carpet. "#WaterMagic #FireplaceAshes #SilverApple", and then posts it, to which Cater immediately likes it.

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - LOUNGE--

A few days later, Riddle asks how Cater did, to which Cater responds that he did really well (85 on written, A on applied). Riddle says, "I'd "like" that if I could!" And then gets embarrassed.

Trey congratulates him, and Cater thanks Riddle. Trey then talks about how he was caught off guard when Riddle went to him to ask how to create a Magicam account, nor had he been expecting Riddle to try to get Cater to memorize the spell formulas via photos and hashtags.

Cater agrees, talking about while the notes were making him tired, the hashtags clicked with him. As thanks, he "got a reservation at a pancake cafe with Magicam-ready entrees---my treat!"

Riddle responds that that was a "one-time assist", and that if he almost fails again, it's off with his head. Cater understands, and that he'll "do it the old-fashioned way from now on."

Riddle sets down a bunch of books, to Cater's surprise. He explains that Cater's going to read them all for his next test.

Birthday Boy - Happy Birthday

(this is the one with Yuu as the interviewer)

(Part One)

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - BIRTHDAY PARTY VENUE--

Riddle talks about how pleased he is by the attention to detail of everything. He also notes that the "pansy embroidery on the tablecloth was done by Ace and Deuce", speaking about how it's crooked, but that it also makes it charming.

One year, on his birthday, his dormmates told him that he had an urgent summons from Professor Trein. When he opened the door, everyone from the dorm was inside, and "they set off party poppers, put an odd hat on my head, and bellowed "Happy Birthday!" in unison." In that moment, he was very confused and startled, and he recalled that Trey and Cater had laughed when they'd seen the look on his face.

He goes on to say that he "repaid" them for surprising him the way they did. Especially noting how it "takes quite some nerve" to mislead him, but then explains that "it was my first time having such a boisterous time on my birthday."

(Part Two)

In response to a question about what he does with his free time, he says that he tends to the hedgehogs. Riddle clarifies that they have a system whre they take turns to do so, so he doesn't have to visit them everyday, but that he still likes to check up on them, because they're delicate and he wouldn't want to see them neglected. He goes on to say that he keeps "a close eye on their food and the area temperature."

Riddle says that he wants to be a medical mage in the future. He explains that "it's a medical practitioner who specializes in treatments involving magic", and that someone has to be "an exceptional mage AND a licensed doctor" to be allowed to take the exam. He goes on to talk about how they have to be able to treat various different physical compositions, "dispel harmful enchantments from patients", and so on. How it's a very demanding profession that requires a great degree of proficiency and knowledge related.

He says both his parents are medical mages, and that they've raised him since he was young to be one as well. Riddle had taken it as a given and never considered other options, but "as I've spent my days upholding the Queen of Hearts' Rules", he's "taken an interest in the legal profession." He also started "reading books about judicial topics" too.

(Part Three)

Something Riddle's really good at are speed crosswords. When he was a kid, the textbooks his mom got him every month had crossword puzzles at the last page. He hadn't been allowed any other entertainment, so he'd "greatly looked forward to solving crosswords after I was done with my studies." He goes on to talk about how it'd gotten boring just solving them, so then he started timing himself, and had fun trying to go faster with every attempt.

One thing he enjoys about them had to be how accomplished he feels after. That "it's satisfying to fill in empty squares", "but the real reward is the way they let you apply the results of your daily studies." He likes moments where he can "make practical use of the knowledge I've accumulated". He also notes that he's been thinking of "holding a speed crossword tournament" to raise the other students' grades.

He goes on to say that he's been creating his own crossword puzzles since he was young. He'd started making them because he thought "it might be nice to give Trey and Chenya puzzles to solve." He continues on to say that he's "created over 3,000 of them." Then he invites Yuu to take part once the tournament becomes a thing.

Halloween - Training Regimen

(Part One)

--POCKET DIMENSION - SPARKLING HALL--

Riddle's dancing with a ghost. The ghost talks about how she wasn't great at dancing when she was alive, but that this kind of dancing is enjoyable. Riddle's thankful, and explains that she doesn't need to worry about being perfect for a casual party, and taht "everyone must enjoy themselves on Halloween. That's the rule."

Riddle then changes dance partners with Vil. Vil compliments him on his dancing, and that he hadn't expected him to be a good dancer. Riddle talks about how he's had "an interest in social dancing since I was a child", and that he'd learned from his mother "as part of my rigorous education". He's more used to "dance routines that have set steps", instead of the ones "where you just move your body to the rhythm."

Vil says that he doesn't need to scowl, because he hadn't been insulting him. Riddle says that it'd came off like Vil had been "making light of my athletic abilities." Vil clarifies that "the point I was trying to make was" that he was able to dance without stumbling whatsoever. It was an improvement, compared to "how your legs shook like a newborn fawn's last year."

(Part Two)

[Flashback Start - Soon after he became housewarden]

--INTERIOR HALLWAY--

Riddle's irritated at how long the meeting was, especially with how it was "just people pushing work of on each other". Trey explains that housewardens are busy, but Riddle says that he's busy too. He starts talking about how he's going to change Heartslabyul to actually "embody the Queen of Heart's spirit of strictness", to which Trey tries to get him to "dial it back a little", and that the students might be a little confused on what to do because of the sudden housewarden change, especially so early in the year.

Riddle says that "things are so dire" because the upperclassmen haven't been doing anything about "their indolent behavior." Then he suddenly stops, telling Trey to go back to the dorm without him, because he'd just remembered something he had to do.

Trey leaves, and Riddle takes a breather to take off his heels, finding he has a blister on his foot. He reasons that they're new shoes, and that he's "never worn high heels before". He questions why people wear them.

Vil offers him a bandage, noting that he'd been wobbling, and that "your dorm honors the Queen of Hearts, but your unseemly gait hardly does the same." He then asks why Riddle chose to wear heels.

Clarifying that housewardens are allowed to "make adjustments to their dorm uniform as they see fit", and he also notes that Riddle doesn't seem to enjoy wearing high heels. He also mentions that the housewarden before Riddle wore sneakers like the other students, so it hardly seemed necessary.

Riddle agrees, stating that it also annoys him when people think he wore them to look taller. He goes on to explain that "both the Queen of Hearts and the first Heartslabyul housewarden" wore them. He'd had his uniform "tailored to match that of our first housewarden", believing that he should abide by tradition, which means dressing formally.

Vil brings them back to getting Riddle to accept the bandage, and Riddle agrees. Vil gives him advice on what he can do to "cut down on blisters", to which Riddle thanks him and asks for what class he's in, so he can get him a new one. Vil refuses, but Riddle goes on to state that "it's a rule in my dorm to always return what one borrows."

[Flashback End]

(Part Three)

--POCKET DIMENSION - SPARKLING HALL--

Vil speaks about how Riddle had gone through the effort to find what class he was in and then gave him a new bandage.

Riddle explains how after that, he'd gotten a "manual on proper walking technique", "watched videos on correct posture" and how to "walk more gracefully", and then "added both to my training regimen." He's glad that he can show Vil that he's more used to them now, so he could correct a poor impression. Vil notes that he figured Riddle had "mellowed out considerably since those days", but that "some things never change". Regardless, he says he sees "no hint of that previous newborn fawn."

Riddle goes on to talk about benefits that heels offer, like how walking elegantly has him automatically straighten out, and that the good posture makes him feel more energized. Vil agrees. Riddle also mentions that it's satisfying to watch the "Heartslabyul students instantly straighten up when they hear my footsteps." Then they both talk about their respective Queens, and how the clacking "can announce one's presence, while inspiring both respect and fear."

Tsumsitter - Riddle's Tsum

(Part One)

--MAIN STREET--

Riddle tries to calm himself down by noting how he already tasked Cater with figuring out what'd happened, and that he needed to get back to Heartslabyul.

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - EXTERIOR--

There's a rustling in the bushes, and he believes that it might've been a hedgehog that escaped, so he tries to get it to come out. When nothing happens, he starts speaking in hedgehog.

Something smacks into him. It's his tsum.

He's confused, thinking it's a plush toy, and that someone threw it at him. Riddle's startled when it moves. He comes to the conclusion that the "safest bet would be to secure it now", so he grabs it.

The tsum causes a fuss, but when Riddle tells it to settle down, it goes still. Riddle notes that what the tsum was looking at was the red roses, before going on to say that they "should have spare hedgehog cages". The tsum then slips away.

Riddle chases after it.

(Part Two)

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - LOUNGE--

Riddle thanks Cater, to which Cater exclaims how cute him and his own and Cater's tsums are together, and he takes a picture. Riddle is unimpressed. He doesn't really get why they've been tasked to watch over them, though.

Cater says it's fine cause they're cute, but Riddle instead goes on about how "looking after a living creature is a serious responsibility", and that they "must remain vigilant" considering they don't really know anything about how to care for them.

Riddle hadn't been able to get it in a cage so he'd kept it in his room. When it was "lights out", however, "it hopped up on my pillow and slept soundly until morning." He notes that it's behaving at the moment, but that he doesn't think it'll last long.

Trey notes that they both look tired, finding himself right in deciding to bring them tea. Deuce tells them to try some of Trey's lemon tart.

Cater takes a picture of his tsum with the tart. Ace also mentions the tea. Riddle takes the tea in an attempt to relax.

Deuce comments on the similarity in appearances, and Riddle then notices it, but doesn't understand how it resembles him at all.

Deuce says they have a similar vibe, that they're both intense. Trey says "it has a certain dignity about it."

Riddle's tsum runs into Ace, making him drop his fork. Deuce offers to give it a slice, but Cater figures that's probably not it considering his tsum hasn't been doing anything, and that they also don't have mouths.

Riddle asks Ace if he was about to take a bite of his tart, to which Ace responds yes. Riddle reminds him of rule 89, that being "Never eat a tart before the queen without the queen's permission." They realize that the tsum knows the rules, and stopped Ace from almost breaking a rule.

Cater says it might've been a coincidence, meanwhile Riddle is smiling at his tsum, praising him. Ace and Trey have a bad feeling, and Cater goes to leave with his tsum.

(Part Two)

--CAFETERIA--

Riddle's tsum runs into two Heartslabyul students for breaking a rule. Riddle compliments him and then they both go back on patrol for any rulebreakers. Ace says that they should finish up, as Riddle's been going a little overboard "now that he's got a partner in rule regulation."

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - ROSE MAZE--

Riddle compliments the tsum for finding another rulebreaker, about to step in when the tsum rushes off. Riddle yells at him to come back, and the tsum knocks into someone.

Riddle says that "his attire may be in violation of the rules", but that it isn't allowed to "tackle students willy-nilly", and that it isn't okay "to make their jobs more difficult in the process." Riddle then questions if the tsum is even listening to him.

Trey, Ace, and Deuce come to check up on him. Riddle's tsum runs away. Riddle orders them to get it.

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - LOUNGE--

They captured the tsum on Main Street, and now both Yuu and Grim are here as well. Trey's off getting the tea and snacks. The tsum suddenly hops off Riddle's shoulder and slams into Grim.

Riddle's confused, before noting rule 23, "One must never bring a cat to a formal affair".

Riddle then tells him that "private tea parties don't qualify", and that Grim's not a cat, but a direbeast. The tsum doesn't agree with Riddle's interpretation, much to his displeasure. Ace grumbles that they're going at it again, and Cater compares them to siblings.

Birthday Jacket - Happy Birthday

(Part One)

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - LOUNGE--

Azul offers Riddle a gift, that being a lamp with suit cards. Riddle comments on Azul actually using his intel for "something positive", and says that it'll look good in his room. Azul asks him to describe his room, and Riddle says it's a good place for studying, and that he even has "a storage system that allows me to locate any reference books or other matierlas I might need at a glance".

Azul then clarifies that the lamp is a scent diffuser. Riddle says he's "heard that different scents can have different effects", but that he's never tried them before. Azul figured, so he'd gotten "several essential oils that might suit your tastes", having him only pick one however since his "gift budget is limited".

(Note: To my understanding, interviewers get given a budget to get a gift for the birthday person. It's mentioned in Rook's Birthday Jacket vignette because Kalim wanted to "build a museum with famous exhibits just for you" or "book a private performance with a theatrical troupe", but that "those things take time, and I got told none of that would fit in the gift-giving budget".)

The first one reminds Riddle of the feelings he gets when "galloping through the woods and fields on horseback". The next smells like lemon, and the third smells like roses. Riddle then chooses the one with the roses.

(Part Two)

When asked which student he'd choose as a sibling, Riddle contemplates on choosing either Silver and Sebek (as Azul prompts him to think of those closest to him at school outside of his dorm).

Riddle mentions a moment where Silver fell asleep while they were "changing after morning class", and that Sebek and he had to carry him to class. Riddle also notes that Sebek "looks out for others, in his own way".

Riddle goes on to say that he "often ends up looking after others", so instead he figures that "in the interest of not having to sacrifice valuable study time", he wanted someone with good grades and a good conduct, coming to the conclusion of Jade.

Azul is shocked.

Riddle explains that he couldn't think of anyone else, and that he'd choose Jade as his younger brother. Azul is very much confused.

Riddle clarifies that "an older brother would occupy a higher standing than a younger one", so that if Jade did something wrong, he'd be "entitled as his elder brother to correct his actions". Azul can't believe Riddle's so reckless that he'd choose Jade as a younger brother for that reason.

(Part Three)

If Riddle were to transfer to a different dorm, it'd be Diasomnia, talking about how it's "home to a great many students with outstanding magical prowess" and that he would "fit neatly among their ranks". Azul calls him bold.

Riddle goes on to say that "Diasomnia students all use magic more regularly than students from other dorms", so that staying there he could "gain new magical insights".

Azul agrees with him, and then asks if he'd still aim for housewarden. Riddle says that he would, because he "wouldn't get any other opportunities to face off against one of the top five mages in the world", and that Malleus being powerful "makes him worth challenging in my view".

Labwear - That Was My Intuition

(Part One)

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - RIDDLE'S ROOM--

Trey asks Riddle if hes' done writing the "report for the housewarden meeting". Riddle offers to have Trey take a look since he's finished. Trey's surprised by the big stack of documents, and asks if he wants it to be "delivered to the headmage". Riddle agrees.

Trey tells him not to work too hard, and then leaves.

Riddles goes over the "registration paperwork for the interdorm Spelldrive tournament", noting that Azul's "outlined so many rules that merely READING them is tedious". It starts raining pretty heavy, and he hopes Trey brought an umbrella.

--CAFETERIA--

Trey sneezes.

Riddle comments that he'd told him to "stay warm" and "get yourself to bed early", but Trey had been up late finishing his homework.

Cater asks why Trey's apologizing when he's "the one who caught a cold" so he asks for what happened. Riddle informs him that "Trey got caught in the rain yesterday while he was running an errand on my behalf".

Riddle tells Trey to take his temperature (again) after dinner. Cater tells him that he should go to the nurse's office. Trey keeps insisting he's fine. He keeps sneezing though, so Cater goes to walk Trey back to the dorm.

--LIBRARY--

Riddle's searching for a hot soup recipe, and Lilia asks him what's wrong, and notices the cookbook. He asks him if he cooks, as he'd "thought the vice housewarden was in charge of that".

Riddle starts to explain but Lilia interrupts, coming to the conclusion that Trey has a cold. He continues to clarify that they're in the same classes, so it'd be hard not to notice, and makes a correct guess on what Riddle's looking for.

Lilia says that he's "no stranger to seeing people struggle with things outside of their usual element" and that Silver's been through it many times. Riddle says he isn't struggling, and that he just needs to find a recipe.

Lilia says he probably won't find one though, because he himself had "looked for the same thing in here before", as "mild, cold-busting soups are so simple to make that cookbooks never bother detailing them." Riddle figures he'll come up with something else then, but Lilia offers to teach him how to make one.

(Part Two)

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - KITCHEN--

Riddle comments on how cold it is, but Lilia says "of course it's cooler in here when not in use" as it's "full of heat sources", before bringing them back to the topic of the soup.

For how much water to use, Lilia says to "measure out how much you think he'd eat", and goes on to assume how much soup stock to add as he can't remember the exact ratio.

He goes on to say that there's "a lot of intuition involved" with fine-tuning the flavor, but Riddle doesn't really get it. Lilia instead asks him "what suits YOUR palate?"

Riddle "likes strawberry tarts, but one can't exactly put those in a soup." Lilia challenges him instead with a "can't you?", and that "it seems to me like putting in foods you like is a good way to whet the appetite", and goes on to mention other ingredients.

Riddle's confused that it gets put in soup, but he figures that "it IS important to maximize nutrient absorption".

When asked how much to add, Lilia says, "the more nutrients you put in, the faster he'll recover", so Riddle figures he should add a lot.

Lilia comments that "when I last made this, I added chili pepper too", and that "Silver practically sprang out of his seat after one slurp."

Riddle questioned if "stimulants" would be "counterproductive", and then says he's done with his seasonings. Lilia asks if he's not putting anything else in.

Riddle agrees, saying that "I let thoughts of Trey guide me" and that "that was my intuition." Lilia concedes and says that "all you have to do is boil it, and you're done". Riddle questions where to set the heat, as it's "giving off a rather…pungent odor."

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - TREY'S ROOM--

Trey had been napping since he'd gotten back to the dorm, so he was awake now (it's night). He's "feeling a little bit better" and "taking care of some homework".

When asked what Riddle's got, Riddle replies that he'd made some homemade soup, and that "no pressure if you'd rather not partake" considering "it was my first go at" this kind of thing, "so I'm not sure how well it turned out". He also says he'll "eat it for breakfast tomorrow if it doesn't suit you", but Trey says he doesn't mind, and thanks Riddle.

Trey takes a sip, and Riddle says he doesn't need to have it while he's there. Trey (coughing) instead says that "you went through the trouble of making it", so he wanted to "give you feedback".

He goes on to say that it's "not a bad first effort". Riddle starts to speak but then sneezes. Trey worries over him.

--SCHOOL INFIRMARY--

(the next day)

Jade advises Riddle to take care of himself. Riddle thanks him for "walking me to the nurse's fofice during class" and apologizes.

The nurse isn't there but "there's an open bed" so he takes his temperature and then gets an ice pack.

He forgot to change, but he can't be bothered to take off his labcoat. He wakes up to Trey greeting him, and that class is over.

Riddle asks what he's doing here, and Trey responds that "I heard you were sleeping in the nurse's office" so he "came to check up on you". He asks how he's feeling, and Riddle says he's feeling better, before being interrupted by a sneeze.

Trey tells him to take it easy, and also thanks him for the soup, and that he'd finished the entire batch. Riddle calls him a fool, before saying that he can walk back to the dorm and go to bed. Trey offers to walk him there but Riddle refuses, before sneezing again.

Ceremonial Robes - What Is Your Verdict?

(Part One)

--MIRROR CHAMBER--

Riddle hopes that some more composed students will "find their way into Heartslabyul" as many of the freshmen are lacking decorum. When it goes to Ace, Riddle says he pities "his future housewarden". Riddle quickly orders him to return to his seat, as he "has no tolerance for rulebreakers", complaining to himself that he'd "have to drill basic manners into him before I even get started on the Queen's laws."

Sebek orders the others to "comport yourselves with dignity and cease your whispering", causing Riddle to believe him to be sensible.

Sebek gets put in Diasomnia, and then immediately loses his composure with "AWWW YEAH, BABY! WOOHOO! I'm in the same dorm as Malleus!" to the shock of Riddle, before he quickly gains his composure. Riddle questions if he just imagined that.

--SPORTS FIELD--

Riddle asks Silver if he's been "neglecting your preparation", but Silver says he has "it under control", before noting the lack of freshmen coming their way.

Riddle explains that "they're likely starting with more popular clubs".

Sebek interrupts them, asking "where I can observe the Equestrian Club".

(Part Two)

Riddle recalls his name, and Sebek accuses him of being a spy, "sent to uncover Diasomnia's deepest secrets".

Riddle responds with "I mistakenly believed you to be a man of diligence and decorum" and that "like all other Diasomnia students, your well-mannered facade bellies your supercilious nature."

Silver tries to explain that Sebek's a special case, but Riddle says he remembers Silver "being rather aloof" when they first met. Silver figures he wasn't that bad, and gives Sebek advice to "correct your attitude at once" and that "it is because of pople like you that Diasomnia's reputation suffers".

Sebek however, refuses to be reprimanded by him, and claims he hasn't done anything wrong.

Riddle interrupts them to start the tour. "I was a bit dismayed by the audacity Sebek displayed as a mere freshman", however "I understand that every dorm has its own customs and ways of thinking. He goes on to say that that's also true for the Equestrian Club, and that if Sebek intends to join them, that he'll need to "adhere to our ideology."

Sebek agrees, and Riddle starts going over the fundamentals. How it can be both dangerous to them and the horses, so they require a delicate touch. "In this club, your upperclassmen's word is law, and for your safety, you are obliged to obey."

Sebek says he'll "obey any orders, within reason," and Riddle notes that he's taking riding seriously.

Sebek talks about how it's an important skill "if I am to serve under Malleus" but that he wishes "to see the other club members' skills before I decide whether or not to join."

Riddle calls it "a fair assessment", and invites him to judge himself if "our club meets your standards". He apologies to Silver and asks if he could ride first, to which Silver agrees.

Riddles goes riding on Vorpal.

Sebek's impressed, and Silver speaks about how Riddle's "trained relentlessly to achieve perfect riding technique" and that "he is even more skilled than I am".

Riddle then stops Vorpal there and asks Sebek for his verdict.

Immediately, Sebek's "ready to submit my entry applications". Riddle's surprised, and Silver notes that "normally, freshmen only submit an application after observing all of their prospective clubs."

Sebek instead figured that "what if I were to submit it late, only to find that the club is already at capacity?"

Riddle agrees "if you've made up your mind", and welcomes him to the Equestrian Club.

Apprentice Chef - Riddle Making Cabbage Rolls

(Part One)

--CAFETERIA - KITCHEN--

Riddle's questioning what size leaf to use as the recipe doesn't sepcify. The ghost chef tells him that "you can always make adjustments when you're doing the rolling".

Riddle then goes on to ask "what volume of water do I need for the parboiling," and the chef responds that he doesn't need a precise measurement, "as long as there's enough water to immerse the cabbage leaves fully."

Riddles goes to measure with a ruler for mincing but the chef stops him, saying that it isn't necessary. The chef then asks why he signed up for the Culinary Crucible. Riddle says that "a housewarden should be the best at both academics AND cooking."

He also says that "it makes sense to get a head start on living independently."

The chef then asks Silver, who responds that Riddle had invited him, hoping that it could help him with his "dozing habit". It made sense to him, and he was "always ready for an opportunity to learn how to make better food."

The ghost comments on how both of them "seem to know your way around the kitchen well enough" and that "you've had no issues handling any of our cooking implements".

Silver clarifies that he always falls "back on the same crutch-- salt, pepper, and sauté" and that he'd like to do more. He'd also like to "cook more enjoyable meals for the father who raised me".

Riddle starts sniffing.

The chef asks Riddle if Silver's words had moved him to tears, but Riddle explained that while "it WAS touching", that wasn't why he was crying. It was the onions. Silver asks if he's okay.

Riddle asks "how do I make it stop?!" Silver tries to stop him from rubbing his eyes, but… "Rubbing my eyes just makes it worse! It stiiings!"

The ghost chef praises him as his "fillings came out with a very nice texture".

Riddle wants to do more to make them equal, but the chef reassures him that "once they're all swaddled in leafy goodness, you won't be able to tell 'em apart", and that "spending TOO long cooking can impact the freshness of your ingredients" to which Riddle concedes. He attempts to pack it tightly but "I pulled too hard and ripped the leaves!" The chef tells him that "that means it's time for you to try again using one of the spare cabbage leaves", and Riddle says "I'll roll it perfectly next time, just you wait!"

(Part Two)

Riddle and the chef start having a chat. Riddle mentions that "seeing Silver cooking up close was a clear illustration of how much more i Have yet to learn" and that he "memorized the recipe front to back" but "still got stumped at several points when it was time to go hands-on". The chef agrees with him about how recipes can be "unclear about measurements and the exact order of operations".

Silver notes that "even an ace academic like you still needs lots of training when it comes to mastering the ins and outs of cooking", and Riddle agrees. He states that "there are plenty of things in world beyond the limited aggregate of my experience" and that it was a "good reminder to stay humble."

--CAFETERIA--

Riddle brings out his dish to the taste-testing table, to be greeted with Malleus.

Malleus notes that they vary in size and that "these two are so lopsided next to each other, it's like a parent and their tottering child."

He explains that as it was a "meal prepared by Riddle" he was "prepared to be blown away by a masterful display of technique" but that "the flavor and plating are both entirely pedestrian".

Riddle thanks him for his honest feedback, and the ghost chef reassures him by saying that he'd done well for his first time.

Riddle thanks the chef, and continues on to state that "I'm not one to shrink from a challenge" and that "one day" he'll "reign supreme as the finest cook on campus".

Suitor Suit - Can't Make a Fool of Myself

(Part One)

--INTERIOR HALLWAY--

Ghost guards are trying to catch him, but he states that "that's my 362nd victory" and that "as long as I'm here, none shall pass". One of them calls him "tiny" but "as strong as a monster", to which Riddle glares.

50 more ghosts arrive, to Riddle's irritation, "if I don't stop them they'll pose a threat to Ace and the others. But even I have my limits…" A rose petal falls off his jacket and he recalls an encounter.

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - ROSE MAZE--

Riddle says that the roses should've been finished pruning before the next day, but that "because of all this Ghost Bride nonsense, I'm nowhere near done!"

Malleus comes across him, and Riddle greets him. Malleus wanted to thank him, as "you're going to rescue Shroud and the other captives, yes?" And that "my retainers Lilia and Sebek are part of that group." Riddle shrugs it off as "I'm not rescuing Lilia and Sebek for your benefit", as the "Heartslabyul Housewarden is expected to show initiative during campus emergencies".

Malleus comments on his maturity.

Riddle asks if he's familiar with "the concept of noblesse oblige", as it's a "prominent school of thought that has a long history in the Realm of the Roses". "Those with power and status hve a duty to aid the weak, proportional to their station".

Malleus wonders if he judges him for his conduct being "unbefitting a leader". Riddle says that "your position as prince of your land must come before your position as housewarden", and that "though you may wish to fly to your retainers' rescue, you are constrained by circumstance."

And that in contrast, "leader or no, I come from common stock".

(Part Two)

Malleus states that he was worried over nothing.

He goes on to say that "as you presumed" he "cannot enter into an egagement lightly, even on false pretense", and so that was why "Lilia and Sebek went on my behalf", but that "it troubles me that there is nothing I can do to free them."

Riddle says that "you must think me rather incompetent." Instead though, Malleus says "I've witnessed firsthand how you care for your vassals and your determination as a leader". That "I assume you've received no royal tutelage, yet you have the bearing of a king all the same."

Malleus continues on by saying "you carry yourself with dignity and grace but you lack a certain…majesty" and that if he's "to impress the princess" that he should "wear something indicative of your stature. Riddle reminds him that he's not an aristocrat.

Malleus then asks if he'd share one of the pruned roses with him. Riddle agrees but asks what he's going to do with it. Malleus gives it to him, saying "when adorned upon you, this simple rose carries more weight than any medal."

He tells him that "if you are king of this rose garden, you must carry yourself with a rose's strength and nobility."

Riddle finally concedes as "with a genuine prince telling me this, now I really can't make a fool of myself". He goes on to say "I swear upon this rose, I shall fulfil my duty and rescue all the captured students."

--INTERIOR HALLWAY--

Riddle refuses to give up, recalling the promise.

The ghost states how he's "not even flinching" and Riddle responds with "of course not! After all, I am…"

--DIASOMNIA DORM - LOUNGE --

Silver asks Malleus if they "shouldn't try to rescue Father and Sebek", and Malleus responds that "it'll be fine", as Riddle has set off.

Silver comments on how he's "surprised at how much faith you have in him." Malleus instead says that "I am merely acknowledging the truth. After all, he is…"

"THE KING OF HEARTSLABYUL!"

Tropical Wear - If That's the Rule... (to be added lol. to be honest i havent even started the event yet)

School Uniform - Ignorance Is No Inconvenience

--INTERIOR HALLWAY--

Riddle tells a group to step aside, as they're blocking the hallway. Azul asks if Riddle's not going to "spare the exam results a glance", while Riddle asks "what would be the points, when the results are always the same?"

Azul agrees, however "I thought you may have slipped for once, but I see you aren't one to be underestimated." Riddle admits to struggling with a question.

He mentions that "three days before the exam, a paper was published, citing new discoveries to propose a wholesale reevaluation of the kingdom's history."

Azul then says that "in fact, I heard the faculty held a meeting about it. As one student managed to answer it perfectly, they decided to deduct points from the rest of us instead."

Riddle apologies, but Azul shrugs it off as "we all had access to that new paper, you're simply the only one who took notice of it" and that "I'll have to keep a closer eye on any new research that crops up" to which Riddle says he'll "do the same". He then leaves.

--HEARTSLABYUL DORM - LOUNGE--

Cater offers some treats from Trey to Ace, but needing to take a few pictures first. Ace comments on the phone case as it's "crazy popular". Cater nods, saying that "mine's legit, too".

Ace then says that he's "been looking for one too" but with a different design, describing it as "that one with the weird creature that's got a bushy head, and feet comin' out of its eyes".

Cater recognizes what he's referring to, but says "this diamond pattern really speaks to me".

Riddle interrupts by saying that they should probably sit if "you insist on keeping this up", startling Ace who asks when he got back. Riddle responds that he'd returned a moment ago, and that, "putting the queen's laws aside, prattling on in front of the entrance is simply bad manners."

Cater apologizes, meanwhile Ace asks if he's seen Cater's phone, and if it's awesome. Riddle asks if he bought a new phone, but Ace clarifies about the case, and how it's the "hottest thing on Magicam right now". Riddle asks "what about it is so unique", to Ace's surprise that he didn't know.

Ace asks how he can "even manage to hold a conversation with anyone" while Riddle assures him that he's "never been inconvenienced for not knowing what's in vogue before." Cater asks "what if Magicam winds up on an exam, though?"

And talks about his perfect score streak, to which Ace is in disbelief, before realizing that "with all the studying you do, it's no wonder you don't know what's going on in the real world".

But that "Ace has got your back! See this design is--" To immediately be interrupted by Riddle stating that he didn't "recall asking for your help", and telling them to "either sit down or return to your rooms to study". He later states though that "I suppose it wouldn't hurt to look into it a little."

PE Uniform - Don't Say a Word

--SPORTS FIELD--

Riddle's documenting his reuslts, but they're all below average. Kalim greets him out of nowhere, startling him. He asks if they can do the sprint together, to which Riddle asks if he doesn't "have a partner already".

Kalim says that Jamil's "on some other exercise" but that "we're supposed to be in apirs, so why not run with me?" Riddle agrees, but on the condition that "you aren't to say a word after we're finished". Kalim agrees, albeit confused. Vargas tells the "next set of runners, take your positions". Then they go off.

Jamil comes over, asking if Kalim's already done. Kalim nods, stating "you looked like you'd be a while, so I just went ahead and did it." Jamil asks what time he got. Kalim responds with "I can't remember" but that "I'll bet it's faster than yours'll be!" Riddle chimes in with "you were 6.81 seconds" and that "perhaps you should consider writing it down next time".

Kalim thanks him as hew was "about to do it over again for a new time, too", and then tells Jamil to "hurry up and do your sprint". Jamil thanks Riddle for babysitting him.

Riddle shrugs it off as "you deserve a break once in a while." Kalim then says "it's kinda nice to see even you can't come first in everything, Riddle" and that "Between you and Azul, I thought I was the only sophomore housewarden who wasn't amazing at just about everything, but"

Jamil then covers his mouth and apologies to Riddle. Vargas then tells them to move onto personal exercises. Kalim asks about dancing together, while Jamil says that "you're the only one who wants to do that" and asks instead "what do you think of practicing our flyting instead? We have the perfect teacher right here."

Jamil then asks "you don't mind, do you?" Since "Class E has their flight test soon". Riddle refuses to teach them how to fly but that instead "you're free to watch if you wish".

He then flies off. Both Kalim and Jamil admire his flying. Kalim calls him amazing, but Riddle instead says that "a true mage simply excels in magic over fitness."

[ineffable-endearments]

A Matter of Life and Death / Stairway to Heaven (1946)

Posted for the @gomenseveryday countdown to Good Omens 2! 16 days to go!

I was able to watch this old movie just by searching for the title on Roku. At least in my region, there are a few free apps you can download to watch it - there were commercials, but not too many.

This movie had two different titles: Stairway to Heaven in the US, and A Matter of Life and Death in the UK.

I’ll admit, old movies can be hard for me to get into because - and this is difficult to explain, but I’ll do my best - the language, the framing of stories, and the very cinematography is so different from what I’m used to. It’s definitely not about special effects and has nothing to do with the quality of the story or acting; it’s something vague. It’s like a dialect of a language that I speak, where I can understand a lot of it, but there are serious gaps in my understanding. As a result, I might miss social cues that most contemporaries of those movies would have picked up with no problem (like slang expressions). If you’ve seen this movie and my interpretation sounds off, there is a good chance it’s because the movie is more than twice as old as I am and I don’t fully know what I’m talking about.

Stairway to Heaven is referenced in the opening sequence to Good Omens 2 (the link leads right to the opening sequence, so don’t click it if you want to keep that a surprise), and has also been mentioned by Michael Sheen as a favorite movie. It’s about a World War II pilot named Peter Carter whose “time is up,” who is supposed to die as he ejects from his burning plane without a parachute - but Conductor 71, his usher to the afterlife (a former French aristocrat who has been dead for a long time), loses track of him in the soupy fog of the English channel. Peter has to appeal to a Higher Authority for an extended lifetime with his new beloved, the American operator at an army base who took what he believed was going to be his final call from his plane. Her name is June.

While Peter is experiencing this heavenly appeal, his doctor and love interest are assuming that his struggle is “real to him” but not literal; they believe he is having many very complicated hallucinations that he needs to work through, while in the physical world, surgery needs to be done on his brain to prevent lasting damage.

It’s said at the beginning of the movie that the ethereal events take place in the pilot’s imagination. While I can take that somewhat at face value, the movie presents the afterlife trial as very real, intermingling it with Peter’s brain surgery and appearing to affect the world around him physically. The movie validates the pilot’s experience and the complexity of the ideas he’s grappling with, while acknowledging that his brain injury is also a physical reality. I can’t be entirely certain whether the success of the surgery led to Peter’s survival or whether the success of the ethereal trial led to the success of the surgery, and I suspect that’s the whole point.

It’s a thoughtful movie with much more to it than just the similarities to Good Omens. However, this post is about those similarities.

There are so many familiar things here. The afterlife as a bureaucracy? Oh, yes, it has that in spades. Theres also an amusing scene wherein Conductor 71 stops time to have a chat with Peter. The main characters are English and US-American, too, and an element of “sides” is introduced in the form of debate over the cultures of England and the USA. This is no concern to Peter and June, but it is very concerning indeed to the afterlife entities who died during historical events.

All in all, I’d highly recommend this movie if you want to connect with some familiar ideas as they manifested in a story from many decades ago. Note that the movie does date itself sometimes. To my relatively untrained eye, it seemed pretty respectful, although there were a few stereotypes that you might expect from 1946, and I think it tried to boldly face some aspects of history (e.g. England's imperialism) while continuing to sanitize others. Overall, though, I'd recommend it!

EDIT: Oh, dear. I didn't notice, but after reading online, I've been informed that there's blackface in the movie. One of the celestial characters is intended to be a Black American, but during part of his appearance on-screen, the film switches from black and white to Technicolor, and you can see that he's played by a white actor. This information is from TV Tropes and I can't seem to find screenshots of any related parts of the movie, but you should be warned that it's in there.

[sphylor]

Ramble about a special interest, now, go I wanna hear

🫰🫰🫰

okay okay okay so!! my favourote book series of all time ever literally ever is called the chronicles of st marys by Jodi Taylor. i literally love it so much UGH andni havent read any of the books in a while so my memory is a little rusty but it is definitely a special interest of mine fhshhfj. basically its about this group of historians who "investigate major historical events in contemporary time" (time travel). its actually incredibly respectful in the way it handles it too.(spoilers under the cut)

it mostly focuses on british history for the most part (its a british bookseries) but they do visit troy, the battle of agincourt in france, constantinople (during the sack might i add which. yeah. that was a stressful moment for sure....) etc etc. its so fucking funny like it has me in tears laughing whenever i read it but its literally do devastating at the same time (my favourite book in the series, "and the rest is history", made me cry 8 times in one read through because of how tragic it is...). but its really well written and researched and youd think with like 14 books in the series, multiple short stories and a spin off sister series it would get a bit stale but honestly it doesnt. the characters are so full of life and, well, character.

speaking of the characters. theres Maxwell who is the main character and who we see everything unfold through the eyes of. shes so funny and witty and doesnt know when to stop which can be her downfall sometimes. she acts a lot through anger and does things very impulsively especially in the beginning. it can lead to some very funny moments (like the time she drove her boyfriend's car into the lake when he gave her the cold shoulder and was rude to her (neither of their faults tbh its complicated fhdhhf)) i see a lot of myself in Max. theres a lot of hurt masked by anger inside of her. shes the reason why i chose the name Max fjdhhf

she faces a lot of struggles as well... but its okay because her best friend Tim is there to save the day (and piss on her a couple of times accidentally). He is my favourite character 100% hes funny in a smooth and charming way. literally such a puppy dog i just want to ruffle his hair and give him treats. also have i mentioned that all of these characters that work at st marys are 1000000000000% audhd like these goobers are so neurodivergent i love em all. but yeah Tim is a proper gentleman super sweet and caring and always there for you but also he ends up going through so much shit and it breaks him it fucking destroys him and its so sad to see...

Markham is my next favourite little guy hes such a little guy a little skrunkly wunkly woo a grimey little goober. his characterisation is pretty weak in the first couple of books but he soon becomes really important and fleshed out. hes the court jester the class clown the village idiot. super funny but he also has a tragic past and when he gets serious he gets serious. while Max and Tim were historians, the ones going out of jumps to different time periods to collect data, Markham is security. he makes sure the st marys building is safe and secure and also goes out on jumps with the disaster magnets also known as historians to make sure they dont get into trouble (its actually more like to get them out of trouble at the very last minute when they inevitably do get themselves into trouble tbh djbfhdj) hes indestructible. hes been shot, blown up, fell off of a 3 story tall burning building, frequently has some sort of illness like mange or worms, and the only bit of permenant damage hes recieved is that a chunk of his ear is missing.

then theres Leon... i have a love hate relationship with him. hes Max's love interest. original Leon from the first 3 books is fine i guess...... he does a lot of shitty things but so does Max honestly.... and their relationship gets ruined over one event where really Max was in the wrong but what she did was understandable... still incredibly morally wrong but yeah.... and neither of them stopped loving each other even when they were apart. and then. and then book 3 throws a massive curveball and kills him off. they never made up with each other. and then Max is rescued from being kidnapped by a younger version of Leon from before they met each other and its rough because this Leon is in a very bad spot and not doing well At All. hes almost a completely different person from who Max knew. and she has to convince him that life is worth living. she knows how the rest of his life will go already. she knows he'll meet her and be happy for a while. and she knows that this is the last time she'll ever see him again. and that she cant even say sorry to him now. and that he will never know what this meeting truly meant to her. its fucking heartbreaking and i ugly sobbed every time i read it. and then she dies gets plonked into a different universe (long story) and in this universe shes the one who died and Leon lived. now this Leon i absolutely love to bits hes so sweet and kind and caring. they both know how lucky they are to be given another chance and theyre not going to screw it up and they really do make it work between them.

theres do much more i could ramble about. like Dr Bairstow and Clive Ronan... or Dr Dowson and Professor Rapson and how those two are totally in love... or how Guthrie or the time Max got stuck in the past... but 14 books is a lot to cover fhshhf I'll leave you with the fact that i actually have a signed copy of one of the books which i am super super happy about !!

thank you for giving me the space to ramble <3<3<3

[femmefaggot]

torchwood audio dramas are a bit complicated cause like. theres tbe monthly range which is just standalone stories with different characters set in different points in time. usually one or two characters from the show + some 1-episode characters....... often the show characters are from the team but theres also been audios on bilis or yvonne and theres been audios only with new characters

then theres s5-6-7 which are. the continuation of the show. so jack, gwen, and the new team characters

and theres special releases which are boxsets about different things. theres a series about torchwood one (which is my fave because it has ianto before the Horrors of the battle of canary wharf and i love some ianto backstory), there's one set in the 1950s,....

i haven't listened to everything because there is A Lot so i mostly focus on the ianto ones but ill catch up on everything eventually probably

soemthing really interesting about orr is that their shape-shifting abilities are basically all about being what the people around them want them to be. at first it was just who the people are attracted to but over time its become a lot wider than that, like in an episode i listened to today the city ran out of clean water so obviously EVERYONE wanted water and orr literally became a watrr supply. and it was very bad for them. but yeah since theyre supposed to become what other people want they kinda struggle to like, be themselves instead of following other people's expectations its so interesting.......... i liked seeing them with javk because jack is always trying really hard not to take advantage of their powers even unconsciously while the others don't always pay attention to that. unfortunately jack might nevrr come back to anything doctor who related ever again because john barrowman is a weirdo 😔 but its okay theres loads of other characters. tbh i think part of the reason ianto is back in s7 is because they need characters from the original team to keep people interested lol, theres gwen but with the rampant misogyny of fandom a lot of people hate her. but no one hates ianto because hes perfect (though if he were a woman he would probably have gotten loads of backlash like gwen did lol)

h2g2 sounds cool i never got into it but i might one day. i <3 sci-fi

NOTHING LIKE GOOD 2 SAY BUT LISTENING AND NODDING SO MUCH this all sounds rly cool ^^ i miss dw and tw sometimes but gahh rewatching is hard IDK like i think it was so formative that my brain is being tricked in2 thinking it rmembers more than it does LOL

the implications of smth shifting in2 what is wanted most is soooo cool thoi i lov that did they explore thjings like that?? io feel tw was always a bit more ummm not serious mb bc ESP 9 era dw was like introspective but umm its like diffrent IDK but it seems like it dhandle it interestingly

[spade-club]

I know this is an ask game but Im bored and wanted to answer all of them sooooo B)

🌲 well in terms of how many we've been aware of, we started with like 8 but since have discovered lots and lots of us that have been around forever, I think the official count right now is 32 but I /know/ theres quite a few more.

🌻 "when kurby swallows mario he become de kart" -Olli

🌾 I have a whole playlist actually! but I gotta say We Are Broken by Paramore reaaaallly gets me personally.

🌙 we have quite a few special relationships but I think most of all our family dynamic is suuper important to us! Donnie, Cass, & Olli find their siblingship very important, particularly.

🌊 couldnt call them inside jokes if everyone knew about them.

🌺 Rose's room is kinda the most important place we have because shes the only one who actually uses the innerworld casually lately. its all pink and black and white & she has a canopy bed. there are candles everywhere. & she even has a vanity and a bay(?) window :) peak comfy space for her to zone out in tbh

🌍 kiiind of?? for those of us who are capable of thinking in pictures the innerworld is great & even partially malleable. we do have someone in charge of the innerworld, but they're rarely around to mess with stuff so its basically for Rose and Chloe and sometimes one of the kids.

🐛 personal opinion (from Cass, hi) is that Bee has made the most progress of all of us since finding out about the system. she used to be very antagonistic and forceful (internally) but spending more time in the real world and making connections and having a partnership has really taught her how to use her energy for good & now wants to make everyone genuinely happy as often as she can, both in sys and in our partner sys!

🍂 idk how to make fusion happen! but theres a few of us who want to whenever we can figure it out

☀️ We like leaving notes for eachother but most of our communication is either out loud or in very loud vivid thought conversations when we cant talk.

🌱 Im pretty open about it in my personal life, most of my friends either know or im comfy hinting about it around them. (ofc most of my friends are systems themselves) but professionally and with my family no one knows!

🌄 oh for sure, I havent had as many doubts lately as I am very aware of how my system dynamics affect my everyday life, but I still very frequently feel kinda "cringe" about acknowledging it because talking about it can feel unnatural sometimes :/

🗻 again it depends on who you ask, many of us have no ties to the innerworld at all, but for Rose it is her home as much as our physical home is (if not more?)

🍁 Names come about in different ways for different ppl. though a lot of it is from music. Donnie got both his online & irl names from songs (What a Catch, Donnie.) Chloe was from the Grouplove song. Cloud (short for Collide) came from Collide With The Sky, the PTV album. Juice is a nickname from my real name. & Candle Rose are just two things she really likes aesthetically lol. most of the rest were a bit more random tho

🌈 Most of us consider ourselves human but as far as self inserts, characters & other such AUs Donnie is a fairy (occasionally a vampire too,) Rose is a vampire, Olli is wolf boy, Cass is a puppet of sorts. & the genuine non-humans are CeCe who is an angel, & Ghost who,, is a ghost

🦔 I miss Indie all the time where the FUCK did she go?? Olli has also been hibernating for a minute, miss that kid :(

👥 My partner & my best friend are both pretty good with understanding when I unmask fully. Some of us, however, still have trouble not unsettling our autistic friends when we unmask. Donnie in particular tends to get a very polarized reception, for that reason. everyone thinks hes mad all the time but really he's just quiet.

🦚 honestly we're pretty open about it & tend not to mask too hard anywhere so I would consider us overt but overtness is a complicated concept because no one who doesnt already know would know, yk? (Olli does mask in public pretty well though!)

DID / OSDD ask game

🌲 How has your numbers of parts changed over time?

🌻 Favorite quote from a part.

🌾 Any songs you relate to DID / OSDD?

🌙 Share a special relationship between parts.

🌊 Any inside jokes in your system?

🌺 Describe one part of your inner world.

🌍 Can you change your inner world and access it freely?

🐛 Which part made a lot of progress?

🍂 Did a fusion happen in your system?

☀️ How do you all prefer to communicate?

🌱 How open are you about your DID / OSDD?

🌄 Did you ever went through phases of denial?

🗻 How much does your inner world feel like home?

🍁 How do your parts get their names?

🌈 Are there any parts who view themselves as something other than human? Or who have supernatural powers?

🦔 Are there any parts of you that you miss?

👥 Is there a person you all can be yourselves around?

🦚 Ho covered / overt is your DID / OSDD?

❔ (ask any other question)

[tmabutlesbian]

im feeling rly tired n i got an exam tmr so i wont be drawing more today bUT i can expand on the um bfu au a bit more to explain their characters a bit more

like season 1 and 2 of bfu both true crime and supernatural is like:

jon + gerry are basically dating but at the same time they assume the other does not feel the same way even tho they live together since jon finished uni and they share each others clothes n shit and go everywhere together

jon + martin are very complicated. here we don't have like the um boss/subordinate dynamic, theyre mere coworkers so martin is less nervous abt jon HOWEVER jon gets very moody around martin since he's in gerry's place (gerry is away because of family issues and also he later on gets another job so he doesnt come back fully, only makes cameos here n there).

since jon is just a petty lil asshole around martin at the start their convos are sometimes a bit stilted and tense, before this show started jon was neutral/nice to martin, his problem is that he's not gerry.

once martin gets fed up with jon's bullshit however, jon is guilty and just as he gathers the nerve to apologize gerry calls him like "YOU IDIOT!!! JUST SAY SORRY TO THE POOR GUY, WHAT HAS HE DONE TO YOU!!" which in hindsight is hilarious, it's almost like gerry read jon's mind but in the moment jon got very defensive and admitted that he missed gerry a lot. very emotional moment between two ppl who are weird with emotions so things get awkward.

funnily, its martin who helps jon out with his feelings, a martin that, very much like canon, has a crush on jon. he's still mad at jon and now he's a lil heartbroken because its obvious jon likes gerry so he assumes he has 0 chances here but he's an adult and he gets past that and he helps jon n gerry with their relationship.

season 3 of bfu:

jon + gerry are datingggggg (finally ffs), gerry gets a new job doing tattoos but on days he doesn't have appointments he's the one behind the camera when the boys are filming, on other days its sasha and tim.

jon + martin are exploring their new found friendship and it grows fast like wildfire. they have great chemistry, their banter is lovely, their funny, and more importantly theyre only jokingly mean to each other. jon is very much a suffering believer while martin does believe in the supernatural he just doesnt believe that these supernatural creatures would leave so much evidence behind and highly doubts any footage or sounds. this is also a way to lessen his fear of these monsters but jon doesn't need to know that

martin is still crushing. hard. jon is very happy in his relationship that he doesn't see his feelings for martin blooming, even tho there are (at this point) several compilations on yt titled "jon looking at martin with heart eyes for 10 minutes bisexual part 5", or along those lines. timsasha tease them constantly, sometimes they make the cut, others don't. on those bloopers videos it's more obvious and the teasing is non stop

martin is begging them to stop because he doesnt want jon to feel uncomfy or anything, while jon finds them very amusing, since he's so secure with gerry theres just No Way that he has feelings for martin, even if his heart fucking somersaults and the thought.

season 4 and 5 of bfu:

jongerry going strong, gerry has evolved to teasing as well and does more cameos here n there just because, he's also behind the camera more n more after the positive response from fans. gerry more easily sees his feelings for martin than jon and purposefully abuses this, voicing out his musings to jon just to watch him blush and fluster (gerry's fav part time hobby let me tell ya)

jonmartin are in the same situation that jongerry were in season 1. basically married already but assume there's no feelings evolved. martin fully on has accepted the unrequited love situation he believes is going on, jon is still in denial despite gerry's help on the matter, timsasha are becoming desperate, hell, the fans as well. it's critical at this point, somebody PLEASE shake them hard, they need to see it.

season 6 and onwards of bfu:

jongerry still going strong folks, gerry is way more direct to jon abt his feelings for martin and they (youre not gonna believe this-) talk about it. jon feels very stupid and after watching those compilations is also a lil embarassed but then he finds martin's versions and just gets flustered because "holy shit, its.... mutual?? maybe??" and gerry just facepalms and says "yes jon its mutual now go kiss. or talk. maybe talk first then kiss, yh"

jonmartin (again this is very shocking i know) talk (WOW OMG) and both realize their feelings (very awkwardly let me tell you but martin was a brave lil boy abt it n they got somewhere), they very much did kiss (wrow) and it was very sweet and all before the start of season 6.

so basically season 6 comes and they dont mention it to the fans, timsasha knew immediately and sigh in relief so now they turn to their new victim: gerrymartin, who everybody assumes is one sided, gerry as well.

gerry is a very bad influence so now its jon who teases martin and talks abt gerry very romantically just to watch martin blush. however it takes wayyy less time for martin to come around because. come on now. gerry's hot n shit n also very nice n weird and a nerd, he's like a taller, goth jon whos a lil less awkward and a bit more confident, u think martin wouldnt fall for this man as well?

anyways at this point, martin is at his what i like to call "lil shit phase but like it's obvious this time", so instead of confessing like a normal person, he teases gerry off and on show. it takes gerry off guard at first cuz "???? is martin flirting with me???? is he just being a bitch???..... i love it" but then he hits martin back equally, so jon is ever suffering between these two when they're in the same room, which is a lot since jongerry live together and jonmartin are dating. timsasha are finding this all very hilarious, so are the fans

season 7 bfu:

jonmartin get togetherrrrrrr, yes bitch. jgm polycule lets go!!! in on of those postmortem vids they casually mention this along with jonmartin n shit (they talk abt martin moving in with jongerry) and the viewers LOSE THEIR SHIT. they trend on twitter n everything. is all very funny. n they're very happy together. at this point a lot of the bloopers is just them being cute n gross n also arguing like an old married couple which they then have to cut or the vids would be like 1 hour long

n thats it. im gonna take a bath now. n then do a covid test!! n hopefully its negative!!! im nervous!!!

[camotherogue]

Wassup mann!! F/O question!! How many F/Os do you have? How did your insert meet them!!

homeslice i gotta be honest i have way more than any sane person needs. More than i can list, i have so many even I forget them sometimes

My current brainrots r my brawlstars f/os (mostly Carl) and Andrias. Grime also. I'll put the meetings into a read more!

Carl

- Alright so ive got a lotta reworking to do for my old brawl stars self insert, but essentially they met at Barley's and clicked really fast.

- I've got a few versions in my head for how they met actually based on what the mood is for before-bed-mental-fanfic-time.

- Main one is that Cam, the stand in name for s/i, overhears Carl infodumping like mad to someone else and just falls head over heels INSTANTLY. And ends up going to Barley's more often just to listen to his voice and such (it thinks his lisp is so damn cute too which only makes it want to go to Barley's more often)

- The other one, reserved for my aggressive days, is Cam getting a bit mean to someone in defense of Carl. Someone makes a shitty comment about him or to him and Cam refuses to let it slide, and gets in the aggressor's face somethin fierce. Depending on severity of my aggression, it can develop into a full out fistfight. Cam wins obviously <3 and Carl is left going .//////.

- However it goes, Carl and Cam click very well due to their shared love of crystals and rocks and the like, autism win <3<3<3

Andrias

- Okay theres a LOT of lore for these two bc I basically never stop thinking about them but Atlas meets Andrias at the same time Anne does. Well, almost.

- Because of his chronic pain and bad knees, he took a bit longer to make it up the stairs to the throne room, and just barely missed Anne and the Gang heading off to their hotel room.

- Rot pokes rots head in, giving a nervous glance before making direct eye contact with the King himself. Because he's socially inept (/aff), he gives a little wave to Andrias, who returns it bc he really is a sweetheart and goofball.

- "I uh, don't suppose they left already?"

- "Ah, you just missed them!"

- "Wonderful." Atlas isn't pleased about the idea of taking the stairs again. "Which way is the hotel room, if I may?"

- Andrias gives him the directions, but seems a touch disheartened that Atlas is leaving so soon. For once, the shapeshifter reads the room, and makes a spontaneous decision not to go immediately.

- "Well, I suppose it can wait. Not every day one gets to meet the King of Amphibia, right?" He steps into the room and approaches the throne, slightly hesitant bc of social anxiety, but he speaks to the king as though he were an equal rather than a mighty ruler, and Andrias actually really likes it. It's nice not to hear "your majesty" and "my liege" every other sentence.

- "Hah! Very true. Andrias Leviathan is my full name, may I have yours?"

- "I don't think I'm interested in giving my name away, but you may know it." They share a laugh. "Atlas Tarbound, at your service. Pleasure to meet you, King Andrias."

- And they click immediately! I could go on for hours about them I'm not kidding (there is so much more than I can fit in a single post /gen)

Grime

- My selfshipping with Grime is a little complicated, because when I get into selfshipping with several characters I tend to make au versions of my self-insert rather than different characters for shipping purpose!

- So the version of Atlas used here is a different timeline from the one that ends up with Andrias.

- Essentially, I determined that with Atlas living in the woods on the edge of the valley, rot'd likely encounter soldiers from Toad Tower quite often.

- And Atlas doesn't like intruders very much, especially ones without decent intent. So rot regularly drives away said soldiers with his illusions, shapeshifted monster form, and traps to keep rots way of life as it is.

- One of these days, Grime leads a group into the woods to figure out what exactly keeps sending his soldiers back trembling and terrified to go back into the seemingly innocuous woods. Because of this, Grime gets to witness the Beast In the Woods firsthand.

- However, Grime catches Atlas on a high-pain day, which means with enough fighting his form fails and it returns its his default: Just Some Salamander

- This is thoroughly surprising and interesting to him, and he strikes a deal with Atlas: Join my forces, and I can help you keep a peaceful life when off the battlefield by declaring these woods off-limits to hunters and the like.

- Atlas takes this deal, and becomes a soldier under Grime's command. Quickly becoming the army's very own living weapon.

And there! Three self-insert stories in one post! I hope you enjoyed my rambles, heavens know I sure enjoyed writing them!

[nicomrade]

🥰 pls go off about miss fujiko....

you know that thing that goes "everything is sex except sex which is power"? miss fujiko understood that perfectly and she knows love is control and she needs control over her own life. and i think her 'femme fatale' characterization and her 'business woman' characterization get to that same thing, it's just that one has her get control through her Female Qualities and the other has her get it through Money. she girlbosses gaslights gatekeeps because shes not going to be made to feel small/powerless (again?) and well, who doesnt want things to go their way. who doesnt want to be in charge. who doesnt like to make the law bend under their boot. who doesnt like to feel powerful, important, feared.

and i think ok so i dont have an opinion on her backstory cause i think it fits her a lot to not have any of her past really Defined cause, who IS fujiko mine? where does the liar and manipulator end and where does the person begin? is it even worth it to make a distinction? and its made obvious in the 3rd episode of her mini series cause here she is under a fake name and a wig looking after kids (fujiko doesnt like kids) being a Nice Woman Lady and she befriends goemon that way and then she reveals shes actually Fujiko Mine, evil liar deceitful manipulator etc and its like well . . . . fujiko no offense but arent both of those personas? didnt you show some of your true colors while wearing the wig and arent you lying with your hair down? arent you both the mask and the wearer? isnt there a middleground, a compromise between the two identities? arent you just buying into the misogyny thats been projected onto you? neither madonna nor whore etc etc etc

AND... ok i have 2 more things i wanna bring up the first one is really quick so she hums and sings kinda often all things considered right? in part 1 ep 2 shes introduced singing in the shower (sorry about that scene btw) and in part 2 she befriends nessie (!!) because shes singing and the cryptid likes it, theres more exemple of this kinda thing. so my little head canon is that her dream job/fantasy job/whatever is to be a musical actress? like shes happy being a thief/spy/etc and if she wasnt one she prolly would do something else but she leans against her bike sometime and thinks well thatd be neat wouldnt it..... Performing... doing her little songs... in pretty costumes... on a stage......

i was gonna bring up her backstory episode frm part 1 but i already told you about it like 3 times so ... im still kinda mad about how part 5 wrote her cause like yeas good explore her relationship w lupin pogger but also dont make it look like SHES the one left wondering about the others feelings. its like. eveyrone knows lupin loves her he tells her every morning and zenigata knows it and everyone knows it SHES the one sending mixed signals (queen behavior) with a complicated relationship with sexuality (due to using it as a weapon/tool like dont even get me started on how her refusing to kiss lupin CAN be read as her refusing to TRICK him because she uses her sexuality to TRICK people and its become so hard to dissociate the two) wtf was i saying. OH YE AND SO HER asking HIM what his feelings for her are is out of character and nonsensical he shouldve been the one to be like "hey fujicakes so u saved my life this is poggers and all but i havent seen you in 9months, last time you said you needed space from me and now ure just flirting like nothing happened? what the fuck?" and her arc being you know. . . . having to be honest with people for once in her life wouldve been way more interesting than putting her in a literal cage in a wedding dress sitting on her ass :)

BUT i dont wanna make it look like her whole character is tied to lupie they couldve gone w something entirely different too. what if they made her pass the bechdel test for once PLEASE give her homoerotic interactions with the (adult) npc girl this time please please please youre NOTHING

IN CONCLUSION: I'm not sure what I'm looking for anymore / I just know that I'm harder to console / I don't see who I'm trying to be instead of me / But the key is a question of control (depeche mode a pain that im used to)

[floralkittygambler]

HuskerDust - More Toxic Than You Think [LONG]

This is the rough version of a deeper and more complex subject I want to ‘decorate’ with more ‘screencaps’.  DISCLAIMER: This is allegedly controversial and led to me getting literal death threats and an ED triggered. Ive about heard a lot of people’s shit on this so dont try it. I’m speaking from personal experiences too - experiences I really fuckin dont wanna be sharin yet they kinda validate my points. I want people to be aware of the damaging image from someone who can speak from experience without attracting dickheads or people twisting things. Again, I aint particularly comfortable sharing this so yeah- Be courteous- TW AHEAD - ALSO LONG ASS READ. DNI STANS OR ANTIS. May tag a few folks, may not.  HuskerDust is an extremely popular ship in the community however there’s glaringly obvious flaws in this one-sided relationship that both the fans and even the team fail to see. Neglecting the dangerous real world implications this ship [as well as many others] present to it’s audience - especially the more influenced of the audience, most who are children.

Angel flirts with all the male cast however one who catches his eye the most is Husk. Now I want to point out a few things [of many... obviously]; Angel is instantly starry eyed upon seeing Husk, likewise he actually started off with a ‘Hey~’ instead of something sexual. However he quickly ruins this after Husk tells him to go fuck himself [defined by: “ go fuck yourselfphrase of fuckVULGAR SLANGan exclamation expressing anger or contempt for, or rejection of, someone.” ie, he rejected instantly] by responding with an offer to allow Husk to essentially watch him masterbate. Alongside this, he cradles his face. Husk pulls away and seems to pull a face to express rage/disgust or growling imagery alongside COMPLETELY withdrawing his body away from Angel as Angel stares with goo-goo eyes. Firstly, Angel loves animals - perhaps it’s Husk appearing cute that adds to this, however Im not going to address animal imagery just yet. Secondly, Angel isn’t really portrayed to respect other’s boundaries BUT he does respect... Alastor’s. Al declines the blowjob to which Angel shrugs and doesn’t push this matter any further. With Husk, he’s pretty harshly told to piss off yet he makes quite and explicitly sexual remark, alongside invading his personal space and touching a man clearly disinterested and pulling away. From the initial rejection, it then becomes sexual harassment.  I also want to add that Husk comes with [some] perks in his feline form. And if my name didnt make it obvious, I work with and live with cats on a daily. Briefly, I have been educated in how to understand cat’s language in various individual cat as well as how to handle and work with them. Cats are often drawn towards me and Ive been successful with various types of cats. My most recent being a cat I’ve dubbed as Big - Big was abandoned quite young and has lived most his life on the streets [where I live is high in crime and drug rings, so you can imagine how strays are treated] leading to him being extremely fearful and hating people, hissing and fleeing just seeing people. I took time out last summer to finally give befriending him a shot. It’s taken just under a year of hard work and now he visits every day for his mush [wet food] and kisses, responds to his name and runs up to me in delight. Ive even taught him a phrase to signal that I dont want him or the other cat’s to fight [keeps them all safe and aids them becoming acquainted under supervision - something that’s been working surprisingly well]. I apologise in advance as this is not going to be the first instance of this sort of thing but they are relevant. Trying my best to keep it as brief.  For Husk, I will be using a mix of cat and human characteristics to break down his reactions.  In this first interaction, he turns his body away in a way to suggest caution, wariness and disinterest. In fact, much of his general body language is that of a man deeply closed off from connections - for starters, he folds his arms quick a bit which suggests lack of openness, shutting off and defensiveness *usually*. Likewise, when touched, he slightly jumps and tenses before pulling back in aggression with flattered ears - a sign cats give to display extreme hostility in a situation. It’s NEVER a good thing but then again, neither is crossing someone’s boundaries. It’s even stated that Husk hates Angel’s advances and wishes for nothing to do with him - the same dislike of sexual advances that Al dislikes in Angel. The ending as they all walk inside, Angel turns to Husk, winking and blowing a kiss his way despite the clear rejection earlier. In fact, Husk once again grows tense and is even irked by such a gesture. This won’t be the last mention of Angel totally disregarding how Husk feels - something that rubs off onto the fans AND the team themselves. And it’s... *concerning*, to phrase it lightly. Angel so far is the most persistent towards the most resistant, and in my post on RadioDust I have already established [briefly] on how Angel seems to chase unavailable men. The more unavailable, the more tempting. The one that got away, mentality. It’s not healthy. And I’m surprised so few have acknowledged this. Taking a break from what we’ve seen in the Pilot, let’s establish some facts about the pair.  Angel died in 1947 in his 30s [some posts specify 34-35], putting his birth year around 1911-12ish. Husk died in the 70s IN his 70s [again, nothing is truly specified, so for both we’ll go with 75 - the same number in his IG username] that puts birth year roughly 1900′s. Now an age gap between two adults of 11 - 12 years difference is actually reasonable and can work, depending on circumstance and whether theres a balance in power or not. But when we account for their life experiences and death ages, it’s something else entirely. Angel died young. Not only that but his mind seems more stuck in his raunchy teens than of an adult. And even THEN, he wouldnt be one to necessarily settle down [by which I mean in life, not romance]. He’s extremely emotionally stunted and his selfishness and wanting his own way come off very spoilt [when Husk is pissed off about the cat costume, Angel gets moody because he’s used to compliments AND is dressing to impress Husk. When Husk wanted the money he was rightfully owed, Angel threw a fit for ages until starting to earn it back - even though he owed Husk a drink, which I’ll be coming back to, Husk still wanted the money in the end perhaps hinting to only accepting a freebie as it’s on offer as well as Angel being overly persistent. He even dumps his pig onto Husk to look after, while theres no issue in pet sitting, Angel said Husk ‘owed’ him due to missing the show yet when HE owed Husk, he threw a fit.]. Angel’s life style is wildly chaotic in life AND death, and even though we all know he’s most likely going to be redeemed, he still lacks a lot of experiences in life. He lacks maturity.  On the other hand, Husk’s been through his own share of chaos and heartbreak. Difference is, he’s had a life time of experience. He doesn’t act immature in a childish sense. He truly behaves like a downtrodden old man. He’s had his days and would feel more secure settling down in a more peaceful environment with fun yet much needed calm. A better way to handle his need for risk. Age gaps in adults that are large [75 - 35 = 40 years!] are far less likely to work for a multitude of reasons. The main reason is the difference in life stages - that difference in mentality and experiences plays such an impacting role on compatibility. Often their goals and energies are polar opposites and their common grounds minimal. There’s also the looming concern of power dynamics. Whilst it’s usually the older figure that’s holds the power advantage, in this case it’s a little bit more complicated. I’d argue that it’s possibly Angel with the higher power. This rarely works irl but it’s POSSIBLE. Look at Hugh Heffner and his last partner before his death. I believe she was around 22. However there’s many common grounds, immediate attraction, and similar goals. Though incorrect, Heffner does give off a pimp-like vibe (he’s not but you get what I’m implying with mothlike imagery). Husk does not strike me as that type. It would definitely cheapen his character. In terms of interests, the main thing they have in common is that they like to drink. A bad habit, especially when one is an alcoholic. Both are also rather lazy except for certain circumstances [Husk will go out of his way to help HOWEVER he’s obliged to under Al, the only one he’s seen to willingly help and bond with/be seen with is Niffty. Angel is when there’s a fight, chaos, drama or any sex work]. Both are also rather snarky and vulgar. In terms of love, both suffer intimacy issues. On Husk, it’s ‘losing the ability to love a long time ago’ meaning he was likely cheated on or at least had a failed relationship. If he was ever ready for a new start, he’d definitely want something stable yet rewarding. For now, he needs a LOT of work - work he is not yet willing to put in, nor does he have a reason to. Angel doesnt want to commit because he’s extremely selfish as well as in an already abusive ‘relationship’ already. Sex work is sometimes VERY taxing on the mental health due to some of the folk you service. He’s seen the worst in many and just enjoys the pay and fuck. IF Husk was cheated on, then it’d make a lot of sense if a sex worker wouldn’t be his flavour, it would just serve as a reminder. Not only this, but Angel HIMSELF actively participates in cheating. Not with Val... but with *Travis*. BOTH know Travis is married (I’d be feckin worried if Trav didnt-) yet they still choose to cheat anyways, regardless of the pain it could cause. Angel even mocks this by sending greetings to Trav’s wife. Honestly this... Reminds me a LOT of Stolas - a main character who sexually harasses another character clearly not interested/comfortable, participates in cheating and we’re supposed to root for them (and before anyone gets offended, I do have more to say on Angel’s behalf so please be patient). Either way, it’s very toxic and concerning. Even if Husk wasn’t cheated on, I dont think many would feel exactly secure after having such a rough past with love, diving into a relationship with someone who’s openly participated in multiple affairs. And that’s no shitting on sex workers either, it’s just a point that some would feel uncomfortable with the idea of being with ANYONE (regardless of their work) having actively and KNOWINGLY took part in having an affair previously - especially multiple. Husk’s in an emotionally fragile place and needs more security. We’ve already established Husk heavily dislikes Angel’s advances. In fact, his responses to Angel are similar to his responses to... Al! His body language is VERY test and closed off to even Al, who’s most likely knew him for a very long time. If even Al gets this treatment (whilst also disrespecting his boundaries) then it’ll be the same with Angel (both force Husk into their lives and schemes, both disregard his boundaries). And he’s shown to STILL go out his way to help both however this is most likely tied to an unspoken ‘debt’ he owes Alastor. Plus he’s been mentioned behind the scenes to be a secret softie and protective grandpa type. But this animosity is very reflective of how Loona behaves and responds to Blitzo as well as how both Loona AND Husk (One being a ‘lowly servant’, the other being a literal old MAN) as pets - even the fans - just because of their forms. But this isnt the first of the disrespect they receive. Now we delve deeper Both are addicts of some kind (Husk - drinking, gambling. Angel - Drugs, possibly sex). Not a good mix at all romantically. Addicts often and unintentionally feed their addictions to each other as well as can increase likelihood of relapsing which even a recovered addict can slip back into. When times get tough (a natural occurrence) both are likely to suffer with their addictions. Interestingly, they can become addicted and dependent on one another, which is genuinely unhealthy for a mindset anyways, regardless whether addiction existed prior or not. Addiction only increases these chances. Angel likes confidence in a man (confirmed on Patreon). Yet, Husk is even confirmed  in streams to be deeply troubled and insecure. One thing he hates is his demon form, something that we’ll touch on shortly. Angel loves quality food ESPECIALLY of Italian origin whilst Husk is willing to eat the shit they give you in bars (admittedly that was painful to type as someone who grew up around pubs - either way it’s not exactly high quality or gourmet is what I’m saying). Interestingly, in some character references of Angel, it’s stated that he hates rejection. Hates. That’s a VERY strong word. This could explain but not justify why he’s persistent with Husk (similar to NiceGuys believing you’re playing ‘hard to get’ - further illuding to an immature and toxic mindset) though it interestingly doesn’t apply with Alastor. Odd.  There’s a counterpoint to symbolism in art. A very VALID counterarguement... If it suited Viv’s style. During Media Studies, Business, Design and Art, hell fucking Silent Hill! - I’ve been educated on effective symbolism as well as artistic trademarks (the most famous that most should know is Alfred Hitchcock!). Hitchcock often appeared in all his films, usually as a sidefacing silhouette, trading marking his films with his very PRESENCE. Viv’s seems to revolve around hearts. I mention this because an IG account made the point that hearts were to symbolise anyone connected with Angel’s story and love life (Valentino’s business and shades/collar, heart behind Angel’s head, Heart tattoo on Cherri’s right shoulder, hearts for Husk’s paws, eyebrow marks above natural brows, wings, and nose as well as most of the playing cards). Thing is, there’s hearts EVERYWHERE in all of Viv’s works and such symbology of Angel and hearts is weakened if it connects to the villains/abusers as well - taking away the positivity in a love symbol. Viv’s used hearts in her font, backgrounds, in characters ears, in all her series just generalised, Blitzo’s forehead, background characters, again the cards, Travis’s eyes, Millie’s right shoulder in the SAME place as Cherris. Even Vaggie had a heart tattoo on the shoulder in some christmas themed artwork (on her left). Heart’s is just something Viv seems to brand herself with. And that’s fine though I feel she could do with cutting it down slightly. One thing to early note on the cards (again, this’ll creep up later and my name should tell you why), most are heart suits and usually either a face card (J, Q, K), Joker, ace or 2s. Face cards/Jokers for more details close up (look at the signing artwork) and the rest are just easier to animate, though a little bit of a peeve to someone into their cards as well as the massive overuse of red in Hazbin overall. It’s extremely unlikely to be symbolic. If they change it to be so, then it’s... Weakened. As I’ve mentioned earlier, Silent Hill is an example of extremely clever symbolism in more darker media (more so, SH is considered a ‘hell’ of sorts and does feature religious iconography WITHOUT causing offence. A great example of how to portray this type of thing - they even mix humour in if you consider some of the sneaky references, dialogues and odd UFO/dog endings).  Discussing Viv’s art further, she drew a gift for her sister (original creator of Husk when he possessed white fur) of Angel playfully dragging a disinterested and annoyed Husk (I believe this was still around the time SpiderMoth was canon). The newish art tends to have Angel putting a holly crown on him or sitting on his knees, Husk seeming too lazy to really do anything about it. Very nonchalant. I also want to include some interesting stream arts here and later to further highlight their bond.  A fan asked Viv in a stream to draw them “actually getting along” - this wording implying that the fan is aware of Husk not enjoying Angel’s company. So Viv did, with an extra doodle of Husk being one of the ‘canadian people’ from South Park who sing “Im not your friend”. The art alone shows Husk’s absolute discomfort, even the extra thing Viv added w/o request. As they’re her characters and the fan asked for what they’d look like getting along, to show this discomfort goes to show the dynamic once planned. Husk just isnt a fan of Angel, especially when he’s being sexual and touchy. It can be great for small comedic parts, however both the team AND fans have now crossed this over to really creepy and triggering realms in their ships. It’s creepy and doesnt look good on Angel (who they actively root for) nor the gay community (more on that).

[Yes Ive already pointed out the comedic side of this ^ but it doesnt bode well considering the other points and issues that arise] There’s also a request for drag angel flirting with drunk husk. Personally thats a lil creepy to specify one of the two being intoxicated and thus not able to truly consent. If Angel is willing to flirt with someone in that state, it doesnt mean he would fuck them, but it does feel the fan was thinking that’s the case. In all truth, I think Angel WOULD flirt with those incapable of consent purely to swindle or pickpocket. I’d like to think [and HOPE considering his own abuse by Val] that he’d never take it further. And I hope Viv, the team and the fans see how incredibly creepy that thought is. I’ll give benefit of the doubt though it is still a concern. Either way, Angel appears... Annoyed? Husk is completely turned away and seems incredibly grouchy and confused. This shows yet more rejection on his behalf as well as Angel’s response to being rejected, which highlights his immaturity towards it. Remember, he’s USED TO and EXPECTS everyone to want him (even saying this in the Pilot). Hell, there’s even a Rich Vaggie request where Viv again randomly includes Husk. This time, he’s faced towards her and relaxed, though seems unimpressed and overall disinterested in this type of behaviour. Behaviour and interests of Angel [Celeb status and rich appearance due to Val, despite getting very little of the cut and the vanity, as well as Husk just not giving a shit about this sort of peacock display]. (Also wanted to note in Viv’s #3 stream 1:50:50, Faust makes out that Husk is a ‘dirty, creepy old man’ as well as him constantly threatening violence towards Angel. I dont see him as *creepy* in this context - as it implies perversion that he blatantly lacks fortunately - though it’s very telling of how Husk feels and again shows this toxic relationship).

/Angel’s Type: First off, daddy issues. He has them. Now let’s look at ‘daddy’. Henroin is shorter than Angel, dark fur, grumpy, old, wears only a hat and tie, big brows... Sounds familiar? Ok, look at his brother Arackniss. Similar to Henroin, dark, short, grouchy, bullied by and bullies Angel, is adverse to Angel and overall possess a bad relationship. Ok.... His main client, Travis! Short, dark fur, moody, Only wears hat and tie, drinker (shown in stream as request so take drinking with a pinch), similar face to- Is no one else seeing this trait? Angel seems to go for these shorter than him grouchier men who either want him for sex or hate his presence. Men who are like his dad and brother. All of these guys are far too similar, and we’ve got enough men in suits, bowties and sharp teeth in this show to boot as it is- The psychology of this type of attachment is rooted in a bad familial relationship alongside the subconscious desire to repair or compensate for it. Unknowningly the person will keep seeking out this sort of guy who isnt good for them to fix this internal issue. The resolution is to NOT go for these types. It’s also connected to intimacy fears, by going for those you know arent good for you/right for you/interested in you is often the manifestation of these issues. Pair them with daddy issues and it’s a disaster! There is science to back this up. Valentino is interestingly the opposite yet still toxic issues arise. Why? Because he’s going from one extreme to the other but with the same mindset. Neither of these men or types for MANY reasons are right for him. And visa versa. Seeing a pattern? ~~~~

Angel w Husk? I mentioned before that Husk hates his demon form. If you’re an old man, a gambler, some Vegas bloke and have this grouchier disposition, why the fuck would you want to look like an oversized pet? Exactly. Angel however adores his own aside from the feet. Now I find it strange how the guy we’re rooting for just so happens to like his own form which was intended for punishment. But that’s not todays post. I said earlier that Angel is heavily fixated on Husk’s appearance. Especially the feline aspects (calling him Husky and Kitty - petnames he hates that also treat him again more like a pet than a man -, dressing as a ‘sexy cat’ to appeal to him which can come off as more mockery. This is even backed up by fans who seem to think an old guy’s gonna act like some school girl anime trope?). All of this completely disregards and disrespects Husk’s feelings and perspectives. Something the fans and team take part in actively. Angel - whether you want to hear this or not - is SELFISH. When Husk ‘owed’ him for missing the show (babysitting Fat Nuggets), Husk begrudgingly fulfils this. The second Angel owed Husk for stealing drinks, Angel threw a hissy fit. The silent treatment, going to other bars and posting about it whilst complaining (again focusing on Husk being ‘cute’). Trying to cop out of it by buying Husk a smoothie (though it looked like a date, lets be real, do you REALLY have to bribe someone to date and be around you? No) and even then he still had to owe the money which was more of Husk’s concern. Yes he did in the end and more money than needed, hence the returning of the extra cash, but that is no excuse for the childish behaviour prior. He’s much too accustomed to being adored and pampered and getting his own way that he cant grasp when people arent a fan or willing to pamper him. If they make them a ship, all it does it make Angel completely into a shitty Gary-Stu that everyone loves and pities for his suffering, rather than teach him to grow, earn his redemption and confronting his own toxicity. Let me make this extremely clear: ANGEL DOES NOT DESERVE ABUSE OR RAPE. But when he starts behaving as shitty, he’s hard to root for. Remember, he’s sexually harassing all these guys, with Husk getting the brunt of it. But it’s treated as a joke for them and only taken seriously for Angel. Val abuses all of his employees. He abuses VOX and even THAT was mocked by fans and staff. It’s... It’s frankly gross.  In every interaction Husk has with Angel, his body language is closed off, tense, uncomfortable, turned away and hostile - look at the IG. He wont even allow Angel to touch him. Compare this to Niffty, who he’s fine with taking pictures with and letting her hang around and touch him. Body language is relaxed (relaxed shoulders, open body language) and he doesnt look hostile at all. What does Angel do? Always tries to get close to Husk (such as sitting as close as possible during Poker) and forces both his OWN hobbies onto Husk (ones that Husk shows a strong disinterest in) and Husk’s hobbies (Poker). It’s very FORCED and not natural. Going back to immaturity, he blames Husk and his cards for being shit at the game. They’re always bickering, insulting, fighting in the comments but fans only see this as a ‘cute couple fight’ or Husk being ‘tsundere’.Tsundere. An anime trope often used in young characters. Irl tsundere is NOT this dramatised. The tsundere you see in anime, apply that irl and you get the recipe for the most toxic, petty and immature relationship going. You get constant fights, unease, not feeling loved/appreciated, little trust - the list goes on. Plus an old bloke really isnt going to indulge in tsundere traits. It’s childish. After his history with love, I doubt he’d be up for games and messing about. For something meaningful, he’d just want open honesty. Their ‘relationship’ feels like it’s written by horny kids attempting a fanfic after being inspired by 50 shades and twilight (both show toxic relationshiiiiiips~). The worst is that these are adult writers trying to portray some realistic yet sensitive topics. This is just ill fuckin taste. Even the warnings in Helluva’s ‘Horny Demons’ leaves a bad taste when the fans are thinking Stolas is the best dad despite both parents ruining Octavia’s mental health. Despite the next day after that episode aired Stolas starts flirting with Blitzo again on IG. Despite Blitzo being clearly uncomfortable and sexually harassed and even co-herced into sex (VERY UNHEALTHY MESSAGES HERE). Viv herself has been in bad relationships so how the fuck she’s blind to this and even borderline fetishizing this sort of behaviour that everyone seems to play off as ‘Awwww cute tsundere <3 BOYFRIENDS BOYFRIENDS BOYFRIENDS’ is abhorrent. I’ll go into this more later on how this really just... It treats male sexual harassment and assault as a fucking joke- Angel’s constant unwarranted flirting is no different from the freaks on IG that send dick pics to underage kids and random women in their dms and fathom that they’re ‘nice’ and have a ‘chance’. Wanna know the creepiest? The candid photo of Husk on Angel’s wall. Something Husk seems horrified about. It’s fangirlish and teenager like at BEST, and obsessive stalker at worst. He’s NOT respecting Husk’s boundaries or feelings. That’s still up despite Husk’s reaction. He still wore the costume despite Husk’s feelings. Angel’s thinking with his dick and it’s such a fucked up message that everyone seems to support just because ‘its FICTION. Theyre in HELL.Theyre BAD people.’ Yeah? Well look at how that’s effecting and warping reality and perspective. It’s glamourising it. Fetishsizing stalking and making it cute. Yer have celebrity or boyband or whatever youre a fan of pics on your wall. NOT your crush. NOT someone who clearly isnt interested or happy with this. If someone who kept commenting on your pictures “sexy” suddenly had a picture of you on their wall, what would YOU think? How would YOU FEEL? Because myself and my own sisters have been in VERY fucking similar situations and it’s traumatic. His paw is even attempting the lens - Angel is crossing his boundaries and not getting the message that Husk doesnt want this. He’s forcing himself onto Husk. Yknow... VAL forced himself on Angel and it ended up in numerous rapes. Angel hasnt raped Husk, but if he wont take no. If he wont respect boundaries. If he only wants Husk to do what he wants but throws a fit when he owes husk - he’s picking up on Val’s bad habits more and more. How are so few - even the very team creating this - not seeing how disgusting this is? Are we only supposed to give a shit if Angels hurt? If so, the message isnt so much of how despicable Val is but how awful it is to upset Angel. Fans constantly blame Husk for being grumpy, annoyed at or rejecting Angel. Look at this real world implication. Not only that but Angel being gay just reinforces one of the worlds most disgusting and inaccurate stereotype of gay men being sexual predators and forcing men to have sex whether theyre comfortable or not. MOST gay men arent like this, and those who are its just because THEYRE shitty people (Jeffree fucking Starr, but look how people ‘stan’ his fuckin behaviour). Val is rubbing off on Angel as much as fiction has a MASSIVE impact on reality - whether we’re willing to admit it or not. Like Val, hes pushing past boundaries, he’s selfish, hes more into visuals than anything else. It’s one sided, superficial and theres no click. No connection. Be in this situation yourself and seeing this sorta shit becomes second nature to stay alive. Angel even says that most of hells residents are ‘ugly freaks’ yet finds Husk cute. It’s all LOOKS. Who else likes appearances alone? Val. I know this will trigger and upset fans, Ive been told to fucking die and have my ED triggered when I mentioned it before. But accept that all of them have flaws. Everyone irl have flaws. But there’s flaws and then theres a fuckin crime. If Husk was a woman, more people would see the flaw, but even then... Look at many romance movies - not all but many go for opposites attract (science proves this inaccurate irl), stalking, or even sexual harassments and assualts but she falls for him and they end up together. That aint love thats Stockholm with extra steps. Think you’re triggered and upset? Go through this shit - have a history with it happening - and then see some show you love and a comfort character get treated the exact same and everyone JUSTIFIES it, including the team themselves. It’s NOT cute.  Part 2 to the previous point: Both do share common interests, but it’s very unhealthy such as excessive drinking, both being addicts and being rather lazy, etc. Otherwise the common ground just isnt good. They’re opposites that really dont compliment each other. (Not a valid point here but I find it interesting how Angel loves aquariums and Husk can fly too). Viv’s writing is mediocre at best (but with glowing potential - a diamond in the rough - hence why it’s so frustrating) but Husk’s writing is the laziest. According to Viv he’s (paraphrased) “easiest to write... doesnt care about anything, almost always grumpy leading to similar reactions to everything”. His voice and alcoholism even has a lot of inspiration from Rick Sanchez. As I said with Angel in the RadioDust post, it’s almost like the addictions are seen as a joke. A running gag is fine if you can play it off well and it’s not about something so serious EVEN MORE SO when the series is about how damaging the addictions are and redemption. Why is this end goal being ignored unless it’s about Angel himself? That’s not just favouritism or bias, that’s also heavily self indulgent and a backwards ass message. Right now, Hazbin and Helluva have this ugly fixation on sex and ships. VIV has a fixation on ‘horny demons’. Her main characters are incredibly sexual bar Al (dont even say Husk, Niffty, Charlie or Vaggie or even loona and Moxxie are even on par with the focus and treatment Val, Angel, Blitz and Stolas are given). It’s very fixated and concerning. Its starting to feel like it’s about to divulge into hentai than a legit series with even a hint of the plot or a message. It reminds me of Family Guy trying to be BoJack. It’s starting to remind me of fucking Sausage Party and the final orgy. Sex and swears makes it inappropriate for kids but that doesnt make it adult or mature, and this is coming from someone who swears more than a fucking sailor whos stubbed his bare pinky toe on a fucking crate corner. Constant swears arent funny or artful in the slightest when it’s over done. It’s just... childish adult humour. We cant be expected to want to root for any of them at this rate- All A24 and other companies are seeing is big cash and easily manipulated child audiences (for easy money). They KNOW it can be better but theyd rather be lazy as they’ll profit big either way. This is going to end up like YanSim and YanDev. Amazing potential, shit writing with a leader too stubborn to accept and act on criticism, seeing it as hate. At this point, Husk isnt a deeply troubled man with vices and interests. He’s just fuck candy and romantic end goal for Angel. To compliment and complete him. Just another accessory to the Angel Show. Vivs sister who made Husk even loves Angel so it’ll only serve to further this already toxic narrative.  The ship doesnt look or feel right. There’s too much established now to see the dynamics and favouritism in the creators. Self indulgence. You cant play favourites when you do this sort of thing professionally. The audience can see it and it turns people away. Ask any nonHaz/Helluva fan what they think and it’s... Well, average.  Another thing is everyone went full hype on Frozen focusing on something other than romance as a form of love. But then go back to “Ok now everyone reenact the final scenes of Sausage Party” afterwards. Not everything is sex and romance, and it really is starting to feel Viv and the fans are focused on that like Incels focusing on ‘chad’. It’s creepy. Helping with food, telling someone self conscious on their weight that they’re not fat, not taking more money than someone owes, even helping out with a pet - that’s something that a good friend would do. In fact, Husk even laughs at the goofy Angel cutout and it being destroyed. It doesnt instantly equate to wanting to fuck. The fact that the fans and even some of the team seem borderline horny is... Completely destroying this show, it’s message and everything about it. Viv said ships were hardly the focus in her stream but look at it now. Look at what Viv focuses on now. It’s just fanservice shit. Nothing more. Self indulgence shit, look at the team making rape into a fetish or shipping themselves publicly with the characters on the public IGs. It’s like watching children run a business and it’s painful because the entire series is suffering when it could be amazing.  Friendship should be more normalised as a valuable type of relationship just as much as love or family are. I’ll also add that Husk adding after the show “Oh fuck... Is this what I missed? Shit.” is ooc like the ‘date’ (that was compensation for stolen drinks, like a tamer version of Blitzo fucking Stolas for the grimoire). It contradicts that he slept it off rather than an attempt at staying awake, as well as calling it a “god damn peepshow” implying a repulsion to the peverse tendencies. The constantly commenting, following and posting Angel related pics makes little sense either from someone who’s blatantly been sexually harassed as well as the clear repulsion of the candid pic on the wall. He outright rejected Angel. What would be realistic are the IGs focusing on learning about the characters, their lives and interests - ALL updating at realistic paces. Old men arent tech savvy usually nor care for social media that much. He’d post drinks, gambling, casinos, life with Niffty and Alastor. Heck maybe a picture of Angel captioned “When will this guy leave me the FUCK alone?”. He even only seems to tag angel, even in the pic that had Charlie and Vaggie [their shared account] or Niffty. Theres a CLEAR bias in the staff room and it’s messy. Look how most the female cast is ignored (Vaggie/Charlie, Velvet who posted a birthday gift to one of the new artists on the merch WHY? Gasu btw, Niffty, Millie only posting twice - heck even Vox and Loona sometimes get neglected. CLEAR. BIAS.) The ships focused on are 1) NOT established canon yet publicly favoured by Viv and the team (Stoliz, HuskerDust, VoxVal - that last pair havent actually got a VA either-), 2) Are TOXIC and theme around abuse or sexual harassment but it’s ‘cute because gae’ - NO. This makes gay people look really bad when they’re not. 3) HD and SL focus on one sided, stalkerish, cop out ‘tsundere’ excused ships to sugar coat the creepiness which only further fuels bigotry, 4) SL has MERCH on it now, so thats also profiting on sexual harassment imagery (again, dont give a shit they arent real - the EFFECTS are. The people who can relate ARE. The people being horridly stereotyped ARE). Thing is, the IGs originally were there to promote ADDICT which started as a fan song anyways despite everyone saying how Viv is stubborn in her ways an uninfluenced by her fans (proof says otherwise) yet shes allowed a fan song to be canon. Theres a focus on forced love for fanservice. The IGs have long outstayed their welcome. The Val account allows glamourisation of the sick shit Val does AND entinses fans to bully as they forget a REAL PERSON runs the fucking account, Val isnt even a scary villain either - hes just a big teen like everyone else - stuck in a teen drama with all this. Pimps are smart. Theyre scary. Theyre masters of manipulati- HOW DO THEY NOT DO THE RESEARCH?! Viv wanted this sense of realism and dealing with sensitive topics in one of the worst executed ways Ive ever seen- It’s toxic. It’s dangerous. These are shit messages and your fans display that when they think all criticism is ‘hAtE’ and actively bully real people w REAL EXPERIENCES. Telling them to ‘stop pls’ does fuck all because you still promote shit messages straight after. Like with Stolas to Blitz in a IG story a day after Ep 2. Classy.  Fanservice seems desperate to keep these fans (rather than market correctly... Just like YanDev) and it leads to fans feeling like they have the audacity to steer the series. Poor business with WEAK boundaries. Viv, you lost your series a long time ago. Want it back? LISTEN TO LEGIT CRITICISM. Stop surrounding yourself with yes men. Even my best fucking friend calls me out when Im out of line because a real friend will fucking take the chance of hurting your feelings if it means helping you in the long run and grow.  Mick joked about the inside of Husk’s ears matching Angels coat, that the ears are cat’s most sensitive and vulnerable parts. 1) Cats vulnerable part is their tummy - hence why you need their trust first (alternatively yer get the odd cat that has full confidence they cat hurt you a lot faster than you can tickle them - I own one), 2) Its weird that Viv doesnt know this considering how many cats she has - its important to learn the language of those you love to give them your full understanding and a great bond 3) This romanticises sexual harassment more than it already is in the media (remember, theres women out there still murdered for saying no!) as well as reinforces the stereotypes of gay men forcing non-interested men into sex (again, a very toxic and unrealistic trope - a dangerous one thats led to gays being murdered!). And the ears design is unnecessarily overly complex considering those fuckin wings he supports. If the design adds nothing to the character but aesthetic, then it can go on the chopping block. Rules for simple animation. Besides from Angel sharing the same tooth as Val (who knows if that was added after he started working for Val as branding?) you could use this argument to say Pent or Al are soulmates for Angel because of having striped suits, or sharp teeth - no, it was intended as a joke that Viv fueled to irresponsibly because it’s not the first time she’s dodged publicly addressing something (something youll NEED to get used to in a big company), and she’s publicly dodged shit after this too so Im not putting faith in her until she can act professionally as the job requires. Likewise, professionals should consider what and how they joke as they’re presenting an image of a company/business. And people WILL eat that shit up face value regardless. In her stream #2, a fan requests for art of flustered angel and smug husk to fuel their ship. at 2:10:21, she does so. She’s also done this for Baxter x Niffty and Cherri x Tom. As a professional, you really should be avoiding this sort of thing in the name of fanservice. I get it, fanservice = financial gain. But it also results in empty meaning. It’s a shell of what the passion project once was, hence why you make the ENTIRE skeleton before involving others. The team help construct the muscles, tendons and organs. The public - moreso critics and the more experienced in those fields help sew the skin. Then you bring it to life, the fans become like blood. They aid to keep it alive. Even Ash and Mick mention Husk being ‘tsundere’. Im had most my piece about it earlier, however I’ll repeat and add some extras. Tsundere is an exaggerated personality, often used in younger characters. In terms of a relationship, it’s very immature, leads to poor communication and results in a toxic love. Science can back this up as well as the lack of realism. It’s more immature minds/hearts that go to what they interpret as tsundere in hopes of the love life the media portrays. A farce. Y’know what Angel needs? Someone open, honest, open to love and comforting. He doesnt need someone rebuffing and him chasing. It’s nothing more than an immature thrill. Once the love begins, it’s burns out QUICK. It’s far from sustainable or healthy. It’s not what either really need and further show Angel’s fixation on men who subconsciously remind him of his father. It’s not healthy. Another thing is a tsundere actually IS interested but shows it in the most immature and childish means possible. Would a really old bloke actually give a shit to play those sorts of games? No. Not one coming from a place like husk has. It’s painful how lacking in research and experience these people are. Science backs up that opposites solemnly attract also. In fact, they often either repel or only get as far as friendship.  Fan and Team Mentality in Brief: Im coming out with my ultimate pet peeve: if you’re going to have one of the MAIN characters be a gambler, do your research. The only background shit is a casino, LOADS of sex references (in Pride? Really?) and drugs. It’s like someone listing what they think is adult and tabboo and naughty. It’s yikes. Cards are almost always aces, 2s or blank. MOST are heart suits (like we need MORE red - we get it, it’s hell. But it’s an immature larvae stage hell). I get 2s and aces being easier to animate, however you have Husks wings, the entire of alastor, angels arms - if youre busting the budget for the menial then bust it to the cards. Theres like ONE spade. The full house isnt a full house (here’s a display of the fans lack of education on the matter as well which serves as a sure sign that they know just as little on any of this as SpindleHorse, they think it’s a sign on him being a card cheat. A card cheat. I aint saying hes not but what I AM saying is poker professionals are some of the most observant people in the world. Especially when money’s involved they’ll ensure youve got your facts right. That wouldnt fly at ALL. But theres more~ fans think Husk spent loaaaads of time staring at angel’s face in the IG poker out of <3 Newsflash. When you play poker you read EVERYONE like a book. Every little twist and twitch of the features. Its not about love. It’s about winning. Its about money. Play enough poker and it’s instinct if you want to actually play decently. Call bluffs. Life aint a fuckin romance.) And playing Poker at a BlackJack table? In a casino? These are all common knowledge and basics if you just research. And this is coming from someone with a history of this.  The fans even believed Tipsy Bartender’s ‘Peach Princess Cocktail’ was something Spindlehorse made as a beverage form of Niffty, Angel and even Charlie because of the name. Now, Im not expecting everyone to be a fuckin boozy either, but to not even consider it’s a very real drink does show that many fans are far too young for that 18+ label.  Fanart of HD often has Husk being OOC OR being held hostage (often via webs - one even being reblogged by Viv, aint that cute!). Some even have Husk completely intoxicated, which would be rape. Im not sugarcoating it. Because too many are getting the sweet treatment and copying Viv’s ‘dont address and it disappears!’ tactic - A LOT of internet celebs do it. The ship is drawn a lot by the team in the public eye, Viv reblogs it publicly (SL, HD, alongside canon only ships, how curious-). Husk is pan yet doesnt behave as the stereotype. And Id FULLY support this with my fucking SOUL (fun fact: you cant sell a soul. Thats myth to scare people-) if it was done correctly. But the way bisexuals, lesbians, gays and aces are portrayed so stereotypically (even Pan in terms of Val’s sexomania), it’s really REALLY uncomfortly coming across as Husk being pansexual JUST to make him an ‘option’ for Angel. Hell even the hets are given a shite representation. Some art btw has husk tricked into a kiss. Cute, we’re really starting to like blurring consent aint we? Remember, Angel has celeb power in his world. In the real world, he has a following. HE has the power in the ship massively. Hell, fans JUSTIFY Angels behaviour and absolutely rip Husk a new shithole if he fuckin even so as to DARE OPPOSE ANGELS MUCH DESERVED LOVE! - sarcasm because I have to make that shit clear now. Fans dont care about Husks feelings, he wasnt even popular until this ship started to explode. Y’know what would be cool and break stereotypes? An old straight white guy actually accepting his friends sexualities. The pan thing feels really fucking gimicky and exploitive and gross based on the history of all this shit. It feels disingenuine. Representation doesnt come from it just being there. What next? Katie whips on blackface to further show shes a bigoted knobhead whos white and straight? Dont get me wrong, Katie’s an arsehole but theres other means to show this rather than ALL HETS HATE THE BIG GAE. They dont. They really dont. But hey, we’ll show a gay man sexually harass every guy and root for him! NO. Thats fucked up. It makes gays look like the predators theyre not. It’s like the fucking 50s with modern tech - is that the real identity of Vox? Fuckin maybe. WHAT THEY NEED - FUCKING FINALLY, ITS THE END IVE BEEN ON THIS SHIT FOR DAYS WHILST SICK LUCKY ME EH? CAN YER FEEEEEEEL MY TIREDNESS OF FANDOMS AND CREATORS EXCUSING SHITTY THINGS FOR CLOUT, MONEY, FAME AND OTHER DUMB SHIT? IF YOU CANT, THEN WHAT THE FUCK, AND OTHER NEWS: Right. Lets get our main shit. Compatibility between the pair is really low - lower than even the team seems to see. And yer old fart of a Hag here’s gotta use my personal suffering as an example because thats what the cool kids do, right? Their friendship compatibility is high. VERY high. But low for love. HEALTHY love. In terms of convo flow, it only has a river when insults are flying, otherwise Husk actively cuts Angel short or outright annoys him. In reality, someone like Husk would gross out Angel, but the cute cat look can turn that the fuck around - JUST the look. Fans and the team oddly think it’s cute though. Yes, I remember being negged at the bar and thinking “BOY arent my pants flooded like the fuckin planet when the ice caps are melting”. There’s no click. Theres infatuation and lust one sided based on looks. Husk isnt even remotely interested and no means delayed yes apparently. Angel as a rape VICTIM should know better than to blur consent like this. Angel isnt a rapist [for the skim reading raging stans ANGELS NOT A RAPIST, YAAAAAY!] but he sure has a shit grip on when he’s looking like Val when Val forced Angel into a kiss by not accepting rejection. It’s. CREEPY. Its fuckin weird. Husk is literally named after being a shell of his former self, I doubt random sex and forced interest is gonna make him spring to life like bastard Zeberdy from the Magic Pissin Roundabout. Honestly, sexual harassment and addictions are treated the same in this - a joke. A punchline. A gag. Sure makes me fuckin gag. Nah, the more healthier Chaggie relationship (needs work on Charlies damn part - dont let freaky taxidermy men sexually assault your life partner like that) is booooring, lets focus on sexual harassment leading to true love like all the other shitty romcoms shall we? Or sugar coat it with ‘getting to know them better <3′ like Beauty and the Beast. A story, by yours truly: My mom’s mates with this woman. Lets call her M because her name starts with an M. M is just like Angel except slightly older, overweight and disabled - so not everyones cup of tea visually (shes neither here nor there to me imo, not like I hold interest in shaggin her). Like Angel, she fuckin flirts with any ANY man around her. She’ll even touch without consent, rub allllll up and down their backs and bodies, and not leave them alone. She even did this with a few gay men. Shes not a horrible person BUT mom and I are constantly trying to stop her and get through her head how DISGUSTING this treatment is. But nothing gets the message across. Shes ALWAYS talking men and sex and has an on/off fling with this one bloke (dont worry, hes the male M, cheats and does the same as her). Everyone, even women, are uncomfortable with this. Irl it’s desperate and a HUGE repellent. Men are visibly SO uncomfortable. She does it to my father too who is - in case youd forgotten - MARRIED TO HER BEST. FUCKING. FRIEND. My father is not a man of fear (and interestingly, hes one of the real life Huskers I know!) but this woman? *insert Heavy bc why tf not* She scares him. My dad does everything in his damn power to pull away, reject, resist, avoid and cut her off. The only reason hes even nice to her at all is because mom likes her (when M isnt a gross hornbag, shes genuinely a good friend to my mother - much like angel and Cherri). My dad’s strictly banned from insulting her or telling her to fuck off from my mother BECAUSE of her nature with him. Even at her non horny times, he’s even said shes not his flavour.  I’ve had numerous accounts like this myself (ask any woman-) but the worst was the guy thinking - THINKING - that Id eventually be his whilst he played up a lot of our similarities up, seemed nice and I actually thought I had a good guy friend (put it this way, Im genuinely scared of men because of guys like this). At this time, there was a character I discovered who looks and behaves SO much like me, and shes married. My simping arse for this fictional BEAUT [Im sorry but Iris is fucking awesome] compared her romantic traits towards Olgerd as something Id do - and this was a STATUS. It wasnt even too him, tagging him, nothing. I was just spamming Iris like the Iris whore I am, and... Yep. Ill be honest and say that God only knows what else I did that made him think I was ready to rip off my clothes and shag him. My post history back then showed Im like this when I find a character I relate to. I also send hearts a lot publicly and to friends to express joy - I get NERVOUS how that’ll be taken now. He tried to pit my ex friend and I against each other for him and even cyberstalked us pretending to be a girl named Raven. My GUT told me this aint no bastard ‘Raven’. The vibes he gave me, and the fact when I kept saying no he took it as a delayed yes (He even said “Ill wait for when youre ready” not “I understand and am happy to still be friends”) gave me literal nightmares of this guy tracking me down and raping me. He’s currently dating that ex friend (I was still willing to be their friend and support them but they said it was hard to keep us separate in her lifes and she didnt want conflict, so I cut it off amicably with her and I fuckin hope he treats her right. I even sensed in my gut she’d like him and he’d like her - even that theyd be good together! But then I found she was 17 and he was 10 years older, that he was cyberstalking and pitting us against each other, that he was secretly an arrogant fuck and that he gives off red flags like her ex’s - but shes passed 18 now and I want to trust her as an adult that she can deal with this. Shes got a good family.) As a kid, Ive been fuckin groped at school in my shitty neighbourhood. One kid even harassed me wanting to know if Id started my periods yet. Hed constantly fondle girls and ‘keg’ them aka yank down their skirts or trousers in public, and 2 years later held a fucking KNIFE to my throat in a classroom with the shittiest substitute teacher, all because I stood up to him (I was not known for my bravery at school so). He was harassing my female friend who suffers from it since as well as her upbringing, bullying her and stealing her stuff. Shes TINY. She was bullied just as bad as I - who was somehow both the school ghost AND pariah somehow- - and I stepped in and told him to cut that shit out before snatching her things back. I told her to ignore the desperate prick. Thats when he took a boxcutter and held it to my throat, threatening me to keep my head down. Now my neighbourhood fucking qualifies as the British ‘hood’ but Id been lucky to avoid this. Ironically, I wondered what this situation would be like a year prior. Im convinced I can fucking foresee bad shit now and with anxiety that aint good. I froze mentally and I just said “Wooow, Im fucking scared- *friends name*, ignore him” and continued my work. I fucking mentally kicked myself for speaking but I genuinely didnt know what to do. Obviously not fucking that. He sat the full TWO HOURS at our table with this knife, jolting forward mockingly and switching who he pointed it at. The knife btw was from that very room as it was graphics and art. Teacher didnt even notice though honestly Ive had an entire class throw shit at me and call me a whore and the teacher in that class looked at me and TURNED AWAY. End of the day, I reported it to my actual graphics teacher when he returned and he told me he’d take this higher up and to get my parents. My home was only 5 minutes away but I had to walk alone when most the students were gone AND through a fucking alleyway. I always walked with my head low but that day I kept it high and tried to look brave because I genuinely thought he was waiting for me. That he was going to rape and kill me because he’s a pervert and Id just discovered a fucking violent one at that. I broke down at my door. Do you know how fuckin hard it is to look your parents who are dealing with two cancer patients and other issues in the eyes and tell them their ‘little girl’ had a knife to her through for standing up for herself? We went back, I described everything and even remember the yellow-orange handle just to get this kid punished? I even wrote an official police statement (well, the written witness account they add to their statement and evidence) and had to speak on mine and my friend’s behalf because she was that shook up. I never even used to speak for myself! He got expelled, but yknow what us jolly folk dealt with? Hearing kids and his mates mumbling about the ‘rat’ and how much of a cunt they were. Teachers and kids praise him for his art skills and even pin them on display EVERYWHERE (one - ONE - was a fucking self portrait and none of the staff seemed to find issue in that) and even an occassion where he came back into the school when he legally wasnt (trespassing). Do you know how hard it is to fucking avoid someone without raising suspicions from everyone around you in a narrow corridor? Im TALL too. I got NO support from this and felt on edge because he could easily sneak into school. I couldnt say shit because his stupid ‘spies’ were about. Just typing this is upsetting enough- I also know a rl Angel who’s like him minus the sexual harassment. She’s... I never used to like her and visa versa but we actually get along really well now, even though she can be creepy and perverse- But she wouldnt be my type either nor I with her. Often we really fuck each other off but we can also bond great. Another incident reminds me of Husk’s candid photo. Ive had people keep my photo despite me saying not to however I had someone SOMEHOW at that school one the fuck up that. There was a cut out from a magazine of a lady who looked like my DOUBLE except she was asian. Now I thought this was cool and it made me feel sorta pretty. This one girl showed everyone and the teacher, pretty much everyone was like “Oh shit that really is you, C!” and it was harmless fun at first. Until I wanted the picture. Again, this woman looked EXACTLY like me. Yet this girl refused and said she wanted to keep it and even carried it around in her pencil case. Yes it wasnt me but due to the similarities, this photo was called me (tbf the fuckin pic got more respect than I did-). This isnt the only creepy instant between me and this girl but the photo reminds me of it. And this tops people keeping photos OF me which happened in primary school. This was me but legal at that time. And asain. It was super fucking neckbeardy the way she treated this photo and stared, often stroking it and looking at me. I just hope she was only trying to scare me. Theres one final instance of a sexual assault but Im just not yet ready to be public about it. 2 here already know. Those are some of my rl experiences and more to come (unfortunately) that show these behaviours in real life. It seems - it comes across - that sexual harassment, MORE SO TOWARDS MEN, is seen as some punchline and not something legitimately horrifying or dangerous. It’s not cute. It’s fucking FAR from it.  Ive already mentioned how putting two addicts together can lead to relapsing, dependence on each other in an unhealthy way. And Ive even mentioned what Angel needs in a relationship in the RD post. Luckily for you, I’ll copy and paste it here: “ We need to think about where both are mentally. What benefits would a relationship give both? How would they be good and bad for each other? For Al, aside from his outdated views and being a fucking murderer and narcissist, he actually seems in a good mindspace for a relationship IF he opted to be in one. Angel however has a very immature mindset, likewise is in a phase of life where hes bed hopping. IF he were to be in a relationship, I’d say he needs a male equivalent of Cherri - someone with a similar mindset yet some differences, willing to have fun and in touch with their younger side, down to cuddle, open to share and receive love as well as not afraid to publicly be affectionate with him, someone who sees him as more than just for sex, someone fun, someone who’ll let him embrace his cutesy side publicly without shame - Cherri is younger so maybe someone who’s his age or slightly younger perhaps? I think Angel’s not retirement home ready to settle and needs someone on his level that can cuddle and chill as well as feels free and youthful enough to go wild with him. In one sense, he’s got a teen girl sorta mindset (dont put him with a teen though, it’s fuckin weird-). He needs someone positive and raw, someone to let him be himself as well as someone comfortable to be themselves around him. He has a habit of latching onto unobtainable men (in psychology, this is self sabotaging subconsciously): Travis the client, Val a pimp, Husk (emotionally unavailable and needs HEAVY self work - interestingly far more than Angel - plus he’s still onto his last relationship and an addict to gambling and alcohol), Pent who’s the enemy he was currently fighting (inappropriate timing), Alastor who’s not interested in another but his own needs [selfish, VERY bad for a relationship]. Subconsciously he’s self sabotaging on purpose. There’s many psychology books as well as sources online for this, if you’re interested. Either way, Angel is drawn to men either like his father [who dislike him, shun him, or are otherwise cold, abusive or just blatantly dislike or otherwise dont care about him] or anyone with money to fuel his drug addiction/’debt’ to Val. Going with any of these men isn’t a good idea. Preferably, Angel needs someone who he doesnt immediately crush and obsess over. Someone who he doesnt sexually harass or assault. Someone he can build a connection with quickly that can bud into romance (think how Chaggie started as a friendship which clicked immediately). Maybe even someone he doesn’t expect to fall for but does so anyways. It would be more realistic as Viv wants as well as more healthy. That for once he isnt sex or money craved instantly, thus doesnt sexually harass/assault and is given a proper chance to develop and grow a friendship and love. Someone who isnt an addict. Someone with an on-par mindset where they click. Someone open to love. For any chance of a good relationship, Angel needs to be with anyone BUT who we’ve already seen. There’s too much toxicity that’ll be swept under the rug and justified otherwise. Too much shit to fuel homophobes in terms of gay stereotypes. Even though Ive focused a fair bit on Angel, it’s NOT just about Angel. That’s something fans forget. Some he depends on or someone who depends on him in the long term wont last and will be very dangerous to both. Just because you suffer, you dont then deserve to be rewarded with ‘something nice’. You dont get to have everything youve ever wanted. Giving him any of these blokes [minus Val] gives him a pass. Gives him what he wants. I get Viv loves him but life doesnt work that way. True lasting growth comes from learning that. Acceptance and growth. You dont get everything you want and sometimes thats a GOOD thing. He’s not a spoilt kid who gets everything he asks for, he’s YOUR creation. If you really wanted what your creations deserve then you need to research and be realistic with it. Because hes starting to feel like a shitty Gary-Stu at this rate.” Sorry for that copypaste clusterfuck. Copy paste is not my forte lol Now Husk. Remember Big? Probably not after the info overload, but if you do GREAT. Big needed love, patience, understanding, someone who could help him, someone who understood and respected his boundaries. I spent so much damn time and now he cuddles up and exposes his tummy because I make him feel understood, loved and safe. He NEVER purred or meowed (why would he need to meow when he didnt speak to humans?) but now he does. He lives on the streets of a neighbourhood with rough folk. He used to draw blood and go rabid on my arms. But I was patient and showed him that I understood his reasons but that he was safe with me and had no need to strike out. I never pushed his boundaries let alone doing it multiple times (the rl angel I know is fucking skilled at pushing cat’s boundaries and wonders why they all huddle up to me and avoid her lol). Husk is an unavailable man. Romantic/Sexual love does NOT heal his wounds. But thats the only thought fans and the team have given on his side. He needs love to ‘fix’ him. The WORST reason to get with someone. Theyre not a project and you arent a fucking miracle worker. Treat them as an equal. He needs a good friend. JUST a friend. Like Big, he needs patience, trust, understanding, and extensive help (arguably more intense than Angel’s). He needs to love himself a bit more FIRST. Someone who respects his boundaries INSTANTLY. Someone relatable and similar, open to love not just sex and not as troubled (if they are, they need to handle it way better, healthily and overall be in a good mindspace). Viv can ship whatever the fuck tickles her fancy, but once your passion project becomes public and funded, you have set responsibilities on how to address and handle sensitive issues as well as having to accept criticism. If Husk goes sober in the name of love (ESPECIALLY with the guy not respecting his boundaries and sexually harassing him), then it’s a fucking INSULT to alcoholics.  I know a few rl Husks but there’s one that anyone who knows me enough knows the man I hold closest to my heart was an alcoholic and spitting of Husk. That’s why Husk’s character means so much to me. But there’s only 2 here who know a bit more of this man. This is something Id hoped to not share so soon, nor as messy. And Im already getting waterworks because this is FAR from easy. I guess Husk became the very thing *I* needed in order to face this. This man was my grandfather. WAS. I cant even fucking accept that. I was a fucking child. I feel stupid being so open about this over some stupid cartoon but it just shows the real life effects this has on REAL fucking people. This man was old and lonely. Always at the pubs. He taught me card games, card tricks and card magic as well as one of his own sons dealing with a gambling addiction. I feel so fucking stupid crying about this- I dont want to open up but its the only way I feel I can get people to understand my side in all of this. This man was a fucking MESS. A closed off, lonely, grumpy old bastard. He lost his love because of his alcohol addiction and never found love again. Never got over that woman. (Shes still kicking and we’re close - im keeping some things under wraps between them as its not my place). Gave up on life and love. Worked hard at his fixation on cards and puzzles, as well as crass jokes and knowledge. But he was very lazy otherwise. Bitter and angry. And you know what? He was my world. I love this man with every fiber of my being because he was the first person to love and accept me for me. He treated me as an equal and helped me grow as a person. In fact... He was only ever happy around us kids. He had hope again. Protected me. He used to hate gays and blacks and you know what? He taught HIMSELF as to why that was shitty thinking. He taught ME about differences in people and to accept it. He taught me that you dont always have to understand to accept. He taught me poker and... swears admittedly. He was a beautiful soul that was broken inside. He needed to love himself. But you know what actually fucking happened? You know what I watched as a kid? I watched as he smoked until every morning he woke throwing up phlegm just to BREATHE. I watched as sometimes the light in his eyes died and through smoke breaks and early drinking how he’d sometimes slip and show me his pain. And we’d have deep talks about it and the world and everything. How alcohol ruined his life yet he craved it. His scent. I remember arguments I wasnt supposed to overhear and growing up seeing him fucking DIE slowly in a hospital bed. The man he was ended up as a fucking husk. His skin was bloated and purple, he was half machine on how much shit he was hooked up to. How he was barely a man at all. He was dying of cancer and he fucking knew and never told us. His cancer meds gave him horrid hallucinations. And I practically spent most of my time in that hospital because TWO people had cancer. Two stunning people had fucking stupid bastard cancer. He was a fuck up. He was flawed to shit. But seeing glimpses of the real him was a fucking ethereal experience. He made me feel like a PERSON. And all we could do in the end was watch him just die. He WANTED to die and you could see it but hed only eat around us to fake fight out of his own hubris and not wanting to let us down. That year, I watched 2 of the only people who ever gave a shit about me die the most dishonourable deaths God could have gave them. Years prior I watched his son gamble EVERYTHING away - his lover, his house, his everything. Hes a moderate gambler now with a partner who never had a history of any addiction. She helps keep him in line as he helps her. But most nights I fucking dream of this shit. I cant even think about my hero because I fucking weep. I still have nightmares. Im still up thinking how I could have saved him from himself when it’s him who was the only one able to. I have to live my life with those memories and I was just a kid. Im a full woman and Im still haunted by it. Even that year is blasphemy and I fucking hate it. I want to take him in my arms, hold him and tell him he’s enough. That its ok and he can get through this. Anything that reminds me of him, I love because I know the other side. The real side. The side not tethered to vices. When I see people like that, I pray they see themselves like that too and I want to help them see it. Tell them that they can live again. It’s better than fucking decaying in a hospital bed. That when people make this sorta shit into a cute quirk it’s not. And it’s dickheads like me who have actually seen it play in the real world to REAL people they love. They arent a fucking accessory to fix for your own narrative. They arent a fuckin performing monkey. At least with Rick and Morty it’s kinda humorous and never played for some shitty toxic ship to appeal to everyone who’s never had to face that shit themselves. And Im like my old man but with more hope and no addiction. I drink and I gamble but I’ll never let myself get that low. Because I honour him but Im not as fucking saft. I wont allow it even though it’s a fucking battle. Those addictions are in the blood. My family history. Its always been so fucking normal. I’ll never knock someone for an addiction or try to preach them out of it because theres often pain fueling it, but I’d never encourage it or toxic faux cures and stupid romance promises as some bullshit MLM remedy either. I KNOW it’s fiction but I want people to see the real side. I want VIV to see the real side. Id willingly for FREE fucking sing that shit if it meant spreading a good message. Because this is fucking hell. FIXING IT: The ship’s basis is too set in stone now - too familiar to change. Best is to never let it be canon. Because you know what else it teaches? That rOmAnCe cures all. Not therapy. Not rehab. Not any REAL work. Just fuck and date it all away as if it’s that easy. It’s a mockery! I tried to be professional about this but when the media bombards this shit constantly, the has the AUDACITY to play like it’s giving a good message is salt to the wounds. A kiss with a fist. An old man dont care for the petty teen drama that Angel and Cherri (even fuckin Al) thrive on. Want this to send a good message still? Angel hates rejection and thinks everyone wants him. Have Husk reject him. Especially because no one should go out with someone whos sexually harassed them there. Been there, done that got the fuckin tshirt. Have Husk reject Angel the way Gravity Falls has Wendy reject Dipper. It helped Dipper move on and mature, and this is what Angel needs for growth and to be more humble.  Husk would be a fucking excellent mentor to Angel, a friend and protector, someone who shows him the ropes like Grunkle Stan like a grandfather figure. To not fall for his mistakes. Husk would be a better expert than any of them plus it balances the power dynamtic. It’s healthy and realistic. Touches the topic with the sensitivity it needs. Not everything needs a ship or romance. Wounds healed that way dont stay healed long. Angel seems more fitting as a son like figure, and he can play that dad like role for him. And if any of the team EVER saw this, fucking take this idea. Its YOURS. FREE. FOREVER. If we wanna play this NDA but still reblog some of the story telling arts and have some of our team indulge in it. I wont sue. Fucking TAKE IT if it means doing this shit right because Spindlehorse have beautifully triggered so many different people and their different traumas to please teenagers sexual fantasies, their own kinks and for a jolly good joke.  This is a bastard long read and Ive had to face the traumas again but if good can come from it then I’ll GLADLY dance this duet again. Stans, Antis, dont even TEMPT interaction. You arent brave sending suicide threats behind a screen, youre a coward and a waste of oxygen. I WANT Hazbin and Helluva to succeed. I want Viv and her crew to do well. Trust me, I wouldnt waste my time if I didnt give a shit. Viv is fucking gifted and its being wasted if it’s not at her full potential for the approval of a rabid army of kids and immature adults who dont know any better (stans and antis). I know she would like a good and decent fanbase. Stans and antis arent it. Tagging you folks because it’s long but yall actually helped me have the courage to open my trap to this. Screenshots are coming later though all of what Ive said is easily sourced. But this has been days, Im sick, im tired, ive been upset facing my own traumas. If any tags wanna help then by all means but otherwise. @honesthazbinarchives, @siaesnow​ (also added age still bc despite the lack of physical aging, theres also the mental aspect and experiences as well as power dynamics side to it, in case youre wondering), @noirellearts, @enchantedchocolatebars​, @galemalio​ (thank you for letting me weep like a bitch), @angel-blitz​, @critical-hazbin​, @what-the-hazbin​, @hazboobhotel​, @pineapple-critiques-stuff​, @devils-advocutie​, SORRY AGAIN FOR BEING A LIL BITCH FOLKS, I feel awkward like my teen years but yeah- fuck it Im old and imma rot soon anyways. If this experience can help then Ill be glad.

[luque-moreau]

y'know i think its about time ive refurbished my psychonauts headcanons/theories

what??? me??? rewriting my psychonauts headcanons in a more comprehensible and informed way???

ye

alright, i think everyone knows what im talking about, by headcanons i mean headcanon as in singular, and as singular, i mean my "raz is somewhere on the spectrum of adhd".

so lets just get into it:

what is adhd actually?

adhd by definition stands for attention deficit hyperactive/hyperfocus disorder (yes, let me get into the details in just a sec). it is a nerodevelopmental disorder that is almost completely reliant on genetic factors, however conditions during pregnancy can sometimes contribute to certain aspects of how adhd manifests itself.

long story short, people with adhd have a smaller frontal lobe, and therefore less dopamine in general (even though yes, it is more complicated than that).

theres also a little bit of "chicken or the egg first" goin on here, certain behaviors or personality tendencies can also affect how adhd is presented in one individual to the next, however its still not clear if that is because it is an accommodating for a certain thought process or if someones experiences and personality shape their symptoms of adhd entirely. its a very blurry line, and the answer is different for everybody.

hyperactive type

hyperactive type is probably the closest to most stereotypical depictions of adhd, think the 5 year old whos parents brush off their child’s hyperactivity as something that will “go with age”. however, this isn’t only present in children, adults with adhd have to deal with a constant need for stimuli to make up for the lack of dopamine their current activity is providing them. this results in someone fidgeting frequently in repetitive or predictable motions, unable to hold attention to a specific task for long periods of time, or many other of the symptoms associated with adhd.(i sadly cannot provide more information in this area, i am not knowledgeable enough to...)

hyperfocus type

hyperfocus type is a tricky one, it can look like the complete opposite of adhd in theory. hyperfocus can look similar to special interests or hyperfixation, a great deal of time and knowledge dedicated to a very particular thing (although it is important to note that even though hyperfixations and special interests are incredibly similar, special interests is a term more typically used within autistic-circles, and isnt really the best word to use if you happen to be neurotypical). Think of maybe that kid who knows all the cool animal facts and won’t shut up about them. Its because certain trains of thought or activities might release more dopamine then others, so to get more of that dopamine, someone of hyperfocus type will be mentally unable to stop thinking or doing a very specific task or topic. this results in someone seemingly always spacing out, unable to change subjects or changing subjects too fast or with little to no correlation, or being completely unable to have enough motivation to do simple things.

personally i tend to fall under the category of hyperfocus myself rather than hyperactive, however the two are not mutually exclusive, its more common to find people with both types rather than just one. even myself, i might exhibit more tendencies to place me under the label of hyperfocus, but that doesn’t mean i don’t have any symptoms of the hyperactive type. its my personality that affects my mannerisms, which then makes certain aspects of my symptoms more or less apparent. Thats because im an INTP-T, i just tend to be more to myself and constantly in a state of thinking abstractly. I have trouble communicating and even sometimes recognizing my needs, and get to a point where im unable to do the simplest of things without feeling emotionally drained. Thats just my experience though, everybodys different. 

so what the fuck does this have to do with raz then?

well lets think about it, rather than have it just be me projecting myself onto a comfort character:

raz finds issue with connecting to kids his age

lets be honest. none of the campers really like raz that much. or at least some do the bare minimum to be try and be polite. it doesn’t seem like any of the other campers besides dogen, whos also socially outcasted, are really fond of raz. lili might like him, but that can definitely be interpreted as curiosity in someone new and different from the norm. It might not be that the kids despise him, but nobodys opinionated enough to care whether he is around or not.

social isolation is one of the most damning things i had to experience from an early age and still feel even today. there is a sense of feeling that you are different among your peers, whether that is a good thing or bad thing. it feels difficult to interact with other people you are not familiar with, and can really stunt you emotionally and socially. from a really early age, theres somethin in you that knows something is very different between the experiences of your peers compared to your own, and it can feel incredibly isolating.

raz and his borderline stupidity

time to get real again. raz is a fucking idiot. at least in the sense that sometimes his decisions seem incredibly spontaneous and not really thought through. he runs from home to attend a summer camp, not really thinking about the logistics of how he will get there, how the staff will react, how long its gonna take for his parent to find him, and so on. it doesn’t seem like he over or underestimates his abilities, he just goes for it without considering. that doesnt seem like the smartest thing to do, even though we know hes incredibly intelligent when it comes to larger, abstract situations. its the little details that he misses, small minuet things that seem unimportant that he overlooks, which can sometimes make things harder for him in the end.

i think its obvious that impulsivity is one symptom of adhd. however i cannot stress how difficult it is to think at supersonic speed and still feel incredibly stupid. i mean, thinking faster doesn’t inherently mean you will have better ideas, you can always be stupider faster, but being able to realize stupid mistakes or inconsistencies in your own thought process is annoying as hell. it feels like every time you try to recognize the issue, fix it, and move forward, you only end up not paying attention to another issue that gets bigger and more annoying than the first. Its always two steps forward, one step back, constantly making the same mistakes even though you try everything in your power to avoid them or grow as a person. The simplest of facts, ideas, or just things to remember end up being forgotten, and once youre reminded of them you remember them and feel like an idiot. however, arbitrary things and complex issues are much easier to digest and remember for me, things like history and the whole blame game charade of it all, biology and how every minuet thing has a greater impact on others and intertwines with every single factor of its environment, philosophy and theorizing why we think the way we do and what can be changed. but oh shit, im a dumbass i forgot to do my laundry. shit. god fuckin dammit.

empathy over sympathy

one of the basic themes of psychonauts is empathy. simple as that. raz goes around into other peoples brains, and tries to help them as much as he can, even if his efforts are not always successful in the way he intended. he never demonizes anyone to the point of unredeemability, and can empathize and understand other peoples perspectives. hes open to new ideas and

although some studies out there theorize that empathy is impaired due to adhd, from my perspective i feel like that is simply not true. if anything, i would say the sensitivity that comes with adhd (hypersensitivity) only enhances that empathy. i could definitely see social disconnection being one of the reasons it might appear that someone with adhd is less empathetic, however i would doubt that adhd would impair a persons empathy. adhd tends to also entail heightened emotions, this doesn’t necessarily mean a more outwardly emotional person, however it definitely shifts a persons perspective of their own emotions as well as others. the concept of hypersensitivity also completely contradicts the idea of people with adhd be less empathetic.

miscommunication and disconnect

sigh, the dad thing. yup. raz has that very iffy relationship with his dad at the beginning of the game which is eventually resolved. very abruptly, might i add. but thats not what this is about, thats a topic for another day. miscommunication seemed to be the root of the issue, however we only get razs side of the story. not to mention the severity of his claims and willingness to seemingly drop everything afterwards. kinda sus, ngl.

alright this ones a doosey. this, i feel, cements my theory pretty well. like i mentioned before, social disconnect and hypersensitivity are side effects of the symptoms of adhd.  this means people with adhd are highly more likely to either misinterpret someones words or actions if those in question are not completely transparent, its because they tend to overthink and interpenetrate responses with too much thinkin n such. the social disconnect makes a whole lot of it worse, it can just pile on top of already established feelings of inadequacy and isolation. and oversharing as a poor coping mechanism isnt an exclusively adhd related thing, it tends to be shared within similar neruodevelopmental disorders such as autism or even ptsd. i find it incredibly easy to disconnect myself from my own emotions at times and think critically at what i feel and how it affects me. which is a bad thing. if i dont acknowledge my emotions like they are my own for too long, everything falls apart. its not fun. but, that disconnect can make talking about certain more traumatic experiences or instances that had deep personal effects on my life and development as a person much easier to just share. and not always in an appropriate manner, comedic opportunity can be   v  e  r  y   enticing. this also explains why raz might have been able to drop everything about his dad after he apologized. he didn’t really, he probably still suffers just as much afterwards as he did before. but he probably wont realize that for awhile, since logically, the issue has been resolved. long story short, he has not had the time to cope, and to put that off he detaches himself from those feelings. w a c k

of course i have other reasons why i feel like raz could potentially have adhd, or at least be accurately represented in headcanon with adhd, some minor mentions being:

he uses his camp map as a journal to track his in-game progress, list of goals, and notes/snip-its of information. writing down information on some form of notepad or book is a common tool used by kids and even adults with adhd to help them keep track of minuet, individual tasks. its just using a planner, but with a bit more information. 

just from my personal perspective, the lengths raz goes to pursue his dream of being a psychonaut feel more like a special interest/hyper fixation sort of thing. he can jump between having genuine conversations with his fellow campers and just exploring the campground, to investing himself entirely in obtaining his goal, even when it seems almost impossible. thats some serious dedication to one very specific thing, y’know?

this one isnt as solid as the other but: m̶̖̰̯̫̍͝o̵̦͖̟͈̹̤̥̝͐̿̄̀̀̎̓ņ̶̛̭̠̐̊̆̍͝ķ̸̝͈̺̙̰̊e̶͉͚̼̅̔͗̂͐̍̕͝͝y̶̦̖̼͖̪͎̝̖̠̐̑͋̾̔̑́͐͘ ̵̢̲̘͎͉̔̀͒̄͌͊̀͌̀m̴̲̫̮̪̖̍̐͆̕͜͝ͅả̶͙͚͗n̶̗̳̩̙̘̼̦̦͇͝ ̷̡̨̡͔̗͕̘͍̥̑͒̎̐̃g̴͔̔̈̅̐̏́̌̔̈́́o̶̥̱̽̆̂͌̀͗ ̶̝̩͙͕͛́s̴̛͓̥̲̜͓͚̣̠̆̓̌͌p̶̜̹̯̦̫̯̣̎͐̽̉̾ḙ̴͇̬͑̈́̐̈́͘͠ͅȅ̶̡̗̞̩͔̫̪͈͑̓͗d̵̠͇͎̜͔͇͒̈́́̀̅̈́̒͘y̸̡̦̠̻̖̥̿ͅ. yeah, its the most generalizing reason but look, hes moving nonstop the entire game, climbing and running around the entire goddamn place wrecking havoc. a bit of imp can be found in most people with adhd if you look hard enough.

so thanks for reading this far i guess? im oversharing even right now with this, like an i d i o t but yknow what i dont want to read the great gatsby rn, so ive got nothin better to do. who knows, maybe the second game will give us more info to either support/discredit this theory? gotta wait for pn2 i guess

:^)

[horansqueen]

Vote For My Next Story

I'll try to keep this short. YOU&ME has ended, and it was a big part of the last few years of my life (along with AM Conversations). It'll probably always be my favorite and best story but that doesnt mean i want to stop writing.

please, know that the oneshots ideas are independent from the story ideas, meaning that i can write a story AND oneshots at the same time so let me know if youre interested!

(click on the read more to read the 10 synopsis of the story ideas I’d like to write)

AM Conversations & YOU&ME ideas:

-oneshots ideas for what happened after the story, before the story, or even in-between chapters in the story. you can send me ANY idea that you would want to read between Liv and Niall or other characters.

-oneshots ideas for any "what if" you can think of (i.e. what if one of them didnt love the other, what if they hadnt seen each other at the bakery, what if Liv had dated Louis, etc)

NEW STORY IDEAS:

NOTES: 

all the ideas are AU. 

 #2 #8 and #9 will include a few of the 1D boys. 

despite the title, #4 is a Niall fic

titles may change

                                   VOTE HERE!!!!

you can also vote by messaging me.

in the form, theres a place for comments but you dont have to leave any

you also dont have to leave your name or anything

thank you if you vote, it means a lot to me!

ill keep this open for a while, until i get enough votes :)

1- UNPREDICTABLE

They haven't seen each other since high school and they hadn't missed each other at all. In fact, they never really could stand each other. Her, a bit of a rebel, listening to punk music, searching for trouble whenever she could... and him, the good boy, popular and loved by everyone, who could rarely be seen without his guitar. It's been a few years already but not many things had changed and they still didn't have anything in common... except one thing. Both of them aspired to become famous with their music. With a twist of fate, they end up in each other's lives again and if they can put aside their resentment for one another, maybe they could bring something incredibly precious to each other. But nothing has ever been uncertain.

This is the story of two opposite persons who share a burning passion that may slowly bring them closer... or make the hatred they already feel for each other even more intense.

2- D.N.A. (daddies now available)

The test was positive. I was pregnant. The problem was, I didn’t know who the father was. It could be my ex boyfriend Liam, his best friend Niall or my best friend Louis. Or maybe it could be that boy I randomly had sex with, Harry... I had no idea and I was not going to find out soon.¸

All I knew was I had to tell four boys that there was a possibility for them to be a daddy in less than a year. Can you just imagine their reaction?

Contrary to all expectations, they accepted their fates.. somehow. And no matter who his daddy was, “little human” was going to get a lot of attention from a lot of men. Exactly like me.

This is my pregnancy story. And it was just the beginning of a long journey.

3- MEANT TO BE

When they first met, Louis was all *MAIN GIRL* ever wanted. However, a decade later the high school sweethearts had change and she felt like most of the sparkles she once had were now gone. Then she met Niall and it clicked instantly and intensely and since then, they’ve been seeing each other in secret, lying to their whole entourage about the nature of their relationship. Feelings started to grow, things started to change, and maybe, just maybe, it’s meant to be. Or maybe not.

A tale of broken hearts, unforgettable love and many… way too many lies.

4- LIVING WITH LOUIS TOMLINSON

Call me Queen Catastrophe. I lost my job, my boyfriend, my best girl friend and my apartment on the same day. Just a little friday afternoon like all the others, right?

Thank god, my best friend Louis was there to save the day. Nothing unusual. I was supposed to crash at his apartment for one night and then walk on my pride and go back to my parents to admit how much of a failure I really am.

However, Louis had other plans : he wanted me to move in with him. That’s when my story really starts. Mutual feelings, drunken sex, grocery shopping, fights that end up with porcelain thrown around the kitchen (I’m an intense person, I know) but most of all, his best guy friend stealing his (our, now) couch at least 5 nights a week.

I despise Niall Horan with all my heart. Him and his stupid charm, his flirty smile and his hands that always ended up in places they shouldn’t. He was threatening to come between Louis and I. He was slowly taking more space in our apartment… and in my heart.

Fuck, I hate Niall Horan with a passion.

5- FOR YOUR LOVE

After months of trying to get pregnant, Niall and his long-time girlfriend found out she was sterile. The news obviously shook their relationship and sparked a few arguments but after a long discussion, they found only one solution : hire a surrogate mother. As days go by, Niall's relationship gets harder and harder to save, and his connection with the surrogate mother of his child becomes tighter. Soon, he gets caught in feelings he can't explain and definitely can't understand. But life is not as easy as just following your feelings.

A story of unsettling feelings, confusing relationships, a deep and strong connection but mostly, decisions impossible to make. Can this really end well?

6- DATING FOR DUMMIES

*MAIN GIRL* has tried blind dates, dating apps, and speed dating to find her soulmate with no good result. Niall has tried pretty much the same without much more success. With all the bizarre, creepy and incompatible persons they meet, they're so close to give up on love until they meet each other through a friend. After a bottle of wine and a long discussion, they start thinking that maybe they were the problem, and that they're too dumb for dating. That's when they decide to make a list of what they individually want and need on a first date and finally decide to try it together. Unfortunately, things rarely go as planned and they will both realize that feelings can't be controlled.

When all else fails, the solution will always be to follow your heart.

7- THE BREAK-UP PLAN

*MAIN GIRL* and Niall's relationship had started when they had barely entered their teenager years. Now, over 10 years later, they feel like something is missing. They didn't know anything else besides each other and it had to change. They still planned on spending forever together but their lack of experiences and mistakes seemed to be an obstacle between them.

They agreed on  break that was not really a break. for six whole months, they would be able to do whatever they wanted to do with whoever they wanted to. Going to parties, leaving for a whole weekend with friends without giving any news, dating and even screwing whoever they wanted, nothing was out of reach.

They only had one rule : honesty. Every friday night, they'd meet and spend the whole night together, talking, making out or just cuddling until they'd fall asleep, to make sure their love was preserved.

Unfortunately, things rarely go as planned and seeing the person you love the most in the world be happy without you is something almost impossible to accept.

A story about angry tears, painful jealousy, sweet sweet revenge and realizing who your real soulmate is. Watch out, it's gonna hurt.

8- HOT MESS

*MAIN GIRL* has always been a bit of a rebel who didn't really care about much. She just enjoyed life the way she wanted to and never really paid attention to anything else. If she wanted something, she did everything she could to get it, no matter who she'd hurt in the process. After a few years away from her hometown, family and friends, she finally comes back to realize that a lot of things have changed. Jumping in her twin brother Liam's life without being invited, she's about to make a mess of everything he had made so much effort to build by flirting with every single one of his friends without any shame. She's not looking for a relationship, she's just looking to have some fun and break a few hearts... but perhaps, she's about to make a mess of her own heart.

Sometimes, you play the game and some other very rare times, the game plays you.

9- 15 Complicated Rules

I have no idea how I got into this mess but somehow, I ended up with 4 different fuck buddies. I thought I was going crazy until I made a strict schedule of the days and time I would see them, and wrote down a few rules I had to respect myself. A useful guide to manege my 4 fuck friends. Monday for my ex boyfriend, tuesday for my co-worker, wednesday for my old best friend and thursday for a family friend. It could work, right?

I've never been much of an organised person but I honestly thought I could make this work. Everything went as planned for a few months until I broke one rule after the other. That's when I knew I was in deep shit. These are my 15 complicated rules to have fuck buddies. And this is the story of my downfall and the incredible mess I put myself into. After all, rule 15 was 'Never Fall In Love' and I guess that's something I couldn't control, even if I wanted to.

10- DISCONNECTED

When *MAIN GIRL* switches college to finally follow her dreams, she was ready to face anything and everything that would come her way. After all, she had been through so much already, right? The problem was, she didn't expect to be stuck in a room with someone who gets on her last nerves because of a paperwork mistake. Despite trying to find an other place to live or spend her time talking to the administration, she had to face the fact that this situation wouldn't change for a few months. Niall knew how to piss her off and he clearly abused that superpower, doing anything and everything he can to annoy the most pretentious and stuck-up person he had ever met. Perhaps fate is having a good laugh, because they seem to get stuck together way more often than not, but it's not until they let down their defense that they will see who the other really is... if that ever happens.

Apparently, some people are in your life to teach you something and make you grow. Perhaps, if you take the time to listen to them and open up to them, your karmic soulmate can turn into your twin flame... or not.

11- NEW ANGEL

When *MAIN GIRL 1* breaks up with Niall, he takes it harder than he thought he would, realizing in the process all the feelings he had for her. After a few weeks locked by himself in his room, his friends take him out on a crazy night and he decides he needs someone else, if only to get over the girl he loves. That’s when he meets *MAIN GIRL 2* and bring her back home.  However, on the next morning, he realizes he doesn't want her to leave, and that despite the feelings he has for *main girl 1*, he could definitely develop something with *main girl 2*. Everything is going amazingly well for a few weeks until what Niall never thought would happen actually happens : *main girl 1* calls him to tell him she regrets leaving him. Now confused and stressed, Niall is going to have to make a choice between the girl he thought he'd spend his life with, and a girl he just met that makes his heart race. And he's going to get help on his journey from someone he would never have thought of.

A story about making choices, creating connections, messy hearts and confusing emotions.

(i have many ideas for this one but i dont want to give everything away!)

[macgyvertape]

50 or so hours into Cyberpunk 2077

This should be roughly the correct amount of time, ive been leaving the game running as I get up to get food or do stretches. Quests are roughly in order I did them

non spoilers above cut:

 i haven't found a single hat/helmet i like, and since you can't hide them I just am not wearing any. It matters that much.

I posted the other day about bugs, every few hours I play I find new bugs. some require me to go back and reload a save others I honestly can’t tell if it’s a bug or just really poor development

there are several perks that don’t quite do what the description says, like the Anamesis perk. Based on reddit and trying it out it seems to just not do anything.

sometimes in car chase segments the passenger will say “look out” as cars spawn in my path and hit me. Can’t tell if that was deliberate or a pop in issue

Yeah I’ve just totally given up on doing pacifist things unless required by a mission. Given up on doing stealth too unless a mission objective, except for sneaking around to set up a fight.

:readmore:

the delemain car quest is fun. From the shock of the one going "beep beep motherfucker" and doing a hit and run to start it off, to the GLADOS car i see a lot of people talking about. It was fun to explore the city when i might have missed places like the landfill apparently there is follow up on T-bug's death if you go back to the quick hack shop in Kabuki. It's not much but better than nothing I made the pass with Panam of "what if the room just had one bed". I know she won't do a wlw romance, which is fine since I wouldn’t have chosen her.  I enjoy her as a character, don’t get me wrong, my V considers her as a friend, but it seems like theres always drama going on which would be tiring. I would have gone for a fling, i like her leotard-pants combo with all the straps

but also her questline was buggy as hell. Multiple cases of having to reload due to clipping into objects, including her in a driving section, or just insta-dying when collision physics with some rocks broke "your neural network can no longer function independantly of the chip" me slapping my desk: s y m b i o te!!! come on lets have some s y m b i o s i s

in the scene with hellman i really liked how Johnny moved around the room. It made him feel like he was really there. it was hard to follow the convo as I left the room, i would not have understood it without subtitles. But i guess Takemura fucking waterboarded hellman. :|

lol I hope the dialogue is different b/c i refuse to smoke for Johnny

i am level 18 and still can't beat the first opponents in the fist fighting quest. ffs

I looked up the romances options so I went to do the I fought the law quest as soon as i got it. ACAB, but like I literally just met River Ward 2 minutes ago, and I really like him. His earring and cyborg eye, his big fluffy coat. I'm definitely gonna sleep with him Ok i like how when River Ward is dealing with the tiger claws if you interject it leads to a fight. It goes better if you follow his instructions and let him deal with it. Seriously I enjoy that sometimes its good to not pick a dialogue choice.

during the red queen club part, there was no dialogue over the phone. So i reloaded a save and got myself spotted and attacked. Then River showed up to help me <3 and it was more enjoyable having him there. I honestly am not sure if him not going to the club level is bug or not.

then uuuuuugh the worst of irl police "cops are my family" from Detective Han. Again ACAB "FRATERNITY OF CITY COPS RESEMBLES A [Nomad] CLAN NOT AT ALL" ok a few minutes ago i was complaining about bugs, but the character modeling in this game is good (when they're there). You can see body posture, characters jiggle their legs when they are nervous. Like I though character A was just throwing a cigarette on the ground, but then character B flinches back; I realize Char A threw it at B as a fuck you

I'm honestly curious if "I fought the Law" quest will have any impact later on. My choices were that I thought there was more going on than Holt being the only person behind this (based on how complicated the main questline heist is, and keeping an eye on some of the in game news), and told him not to take it to internal affairs, and I loved his response of how he doesn't give a shit what we think, he's doing it anyway.

In the elevator to report in, Johnny said "this muck is deeper than you think, tell them nothing", so i just said that the case was complicated. anyway i love how much of a sarcastic asshole V is

I thought i was being nonlethal with the monk quest, but it seems i accidently killed someone. RIP, but thats kind of the problem with this game. Like when i do the non lethal cyberpychosis quests I equip my non lethal modded gun and hope for the est. I like how a go here kill things quest led to Charles the ripperdoc. He's getting all his parts from scav gang members so I felt obligated to take him out. I got a police bounty for it but w/e.

I merged the Delemain fragments with the whole. Guess he's the meta now. (Side note: some of my favorite rvb fanfic plots are Ai consiousness/memory merging with the humans, so I’m having fun with this game and look foward to introspective fanfic)

Honestly Jonny made some good points, the fragments didn't deserve to die; but also destroying the core and freeing the fragments, they couldn't really function alone.

I was able to rescue Saul fine with stealth. Using cameras and the synapse overload really made it easy.  Can't use the sniper rifle reward b/c I don't have the stats for it, and while it has a silencer the fact that it's a ricochette weapon and not a shoot through walls weapons, makes it not as good imo; and theres a legendary one that is stats free for only 100k.

Lol made a pass again at Panam, and she immediately shut me down. I then did Mitch's quest and I love every time someone tells V they area  good person.

I hacked the operation carpe noctem shard, and wow the corporations are using ai to make people have cyberpsychosis, or something like that. What a shocker /s, I've played Deus Ex HR before

lol driving through the unifinished interstate, past the fight from Panam's first quest I found a "batcave" with a very nice car, and a manifesto written by "muckman'. But here's my complaint about the loot, there is a legendary top, but it had 16 armor. My current top has 84 armor, like why would i switch?? then later i found a bunker with soviet spies in it. Wild

Doing River's second quest, love the timing of as soon as you ask, why are we breaking in, someone shows up to tell you he got kicked off the force. It's funny how Johnny comments how maybe River's into you, and V just doubts Johnny's words. Love how the first kid asks River if I'm his girlfriend. also wow like oof both the second parts of Judy and River's quest are SUPER fucked UP!! oof like i stopped doing first person mode on the braindances for those quests as soon as i could, just made me too uncomfortable seeing that in first person.

DRIVING IN THE GAME IS BAD! nowhere is it more apparent than the sinnerman quest, which took me 3 times to get the driving section done, as cars spawned out of nowhere to hit me. Then when you restart, there is a bunch of dialogue it doesn't let you fast forward through. The rest of the Sinnerman questline is interesting. My V took every option to tell the dude that he was messed up, and what he was doing was wrong. idk, I was surprised how much dialogue there was that let you buy into his whole "forgiveness thing" and how there wasn't any real dialogue to call him the fuck out, that in seeking forgiveness he continues to do harm both emotional to the mother of the man he killed, but also that he got the husband killed via cop. The later follow up quest, I told him that what he is doing is crazy, studio is just going to profit off this vid. Then I refused to join him prayer, and told him fuck no i wasn't going to hammer him to the cross, or even watch. Yes, the man is scared of dying, and the corporation is exploiting him, but he keeps creating burdens for others.  I think the discussion on this quest will be interesting to read, it's definitely my own personal experience with religion coloring my view. Anyway back to a main quest, yeah i don't trust Placide, especially in that scene where he grabs my hand, then jacks in. I ran off to do most of the sidequests here and got some criticism from him. I do love how in the cinema the western movie switches to a mission brief as the netwatch agent talks. its a fun enviromental detail.  I took the netwatch offer, i don't think he's being fully honest with me, but he didn't put a virus in my head. As I told Placide later, I didn't pick a side. I like how you can then talk with the agent, who is a fan of Western movies, b/c they show "a simpler time where all good guys carry badges" :eyeroll:, and then V recommends Unforgiven, which from the wiki summary goes against that theme.

Looks like the Voodoo boys all got killed by Netwatch, but I as revenge for them trying to set me up I'm fine with it. Honestly after speaking with ai!Alt I don’t believe their plan of trying to be on good relations with AI would work. 

doing the johnny flashback 2, and wow Johnny really is an asshole. Like I had gotten so used to him in side missions I forgot how self centered and unlikable he was.You constantly get prompts to drink or do drugs, which I ignored. But i do love the goth/punk love Rogue and others have.

lol i called it, when Hellman said that the engram would seek to override the host, put V on the engram. I really like how as the relic malfunctions, you wind up in the chair with a cigarette, which you can either smoke and say you are turning into Johnny or throw away. My dialogue "your problem is the ends justify the means", which is true!!! He and Rogue detonated a nuke downtown, does anyone know that, and like ask Rogue about it????

(Funny you can ask Rouge about Johnny silverhand, over the phone, then the game bugs out and spawns her npc where you are. She doens't say much about the nuke, but she does say no one trusts you for jobs). The line of no one trusting you for jobs is pretty funny at level 46 street cred where im at “respected” status. really loving the family atmosphere at River's 3rd quest. Also his big strong arms, and the fact he is no longer a cop. I totally let the kids win, and wow the family dinner where they GRILL YOU over the relationship and try to set the two of you up, then the water tower scene!!!!! I don't love the first person sex cutscenes but they do have personality. I'm glad afterwards you got to tell River about the biochip and that you might die. Because he's so far removed from your personal plot. So I took that option to back out of a relationship.

I do love that you wake up with "river's tanktop" that says "fuck the police" It actually has extremely good armor stats, so thats what I'll wear now.

panam 3rd quest, when shes like why did you help me, I'm like "because it's important to you". Basically the closest you can get to "when a friend asks for help you help them", which as an ex-nomad backstory I really choose the nomad options when ever i can Paralezes quest part 2! I love the piano song but I always think of it as ocean's 11 music. It's also fun to see the computer and see Judy recommended you for the first quest. The emails talk about "forgetting" to hire a staffer, on the balocony a strange antennia was scannable, the color of the roses was remembered wrong...  lol guess i was right with those giant wall screens. Its fun environmental details that spell things out before you can notice, and it ties into some other quests where people's behavior is being altered. Actually, this quest "Dream On" I love it! For a while I've been like "wheres the illuminati conspiracy! Here it IS! I chose to follow Elisabeth's wishes and not tell her husband he was being brainwashed. In best case they program him to forget again, in worst case he ends up dead. The gaslighting Elisabeth described is CHILLING, her husband describes a vacation she can't remember and she doesn't know whose memories have been messed with. On your way to the plaza you get a call from someone/something that says the know exactly WHAT you are, any you black out!!! It's such a great feeling of helplessness that you're just one person in a world so big that you can't fight every power. As Johnny said, could be a corporation, could be a rogue ai, either way Jefferson is fucked (and so are you).

[tillman]

Fun facts about lancelot pls. Out of all knights i have a hard time writing him he is so complicated. Help!

Youve come to the right place I am full of fun useless knowledge about lancelot :-) hes kinda hard to characterize cus you have to dig through the french idolization and the dutch. Hatred and the italian whatever the fuck was happening in the italian romances but. I think hes a neat character. Hes a flawed man but he tries to do good. He is honestly aggravains foil in a few ways but we dont talk about aggravain. Anyways

LET IT BE KNOWN. lancelot has a scar on his cheek. This is very useless knowledge but he does and this is such a known fact people recognize him by it. Its very cute considering bors one recognizable trait is a scar on his forhead!!! The du lac family bond is incredible.

When I say that I mean it doesnt exist. Sure lancelot and galahad are close and love each other but they nevwr get any time to actually spend with each other besides the boat scene. And sure lancelot and bors would and have died for each other and bors looks after his younger cousin WIDLY but they always have a disconenct . Like they never really truly Get each other. This may just be on lancelots side since bors constantly goes out of his way to protect him but they always just barely miss each other until the end when they colide and everythings too late. Seems to be the theme with lancelot. Lionel (lionel) hes there I guess but hes only REALLY there to tag along with bors. Sometimes cause mischief in lancelots name. Must suck having ur younger cousin outshine you. Literally an orkney situation edbdsjwody. And hector has no character. Thats it. He follows bors around sometimes.

Ive talked about lancelots problems with communication and mental health but its always nice to touch on. He passes out if he feels a strong emotion, he takes naps in the woods, he drinks from random fountains, he cries literally SO OFTEN. hes a mess

With the crying. Hes also a HUGE mamas boy. I think I talked on this before but god he . Wow . He loves his mom so much. Shes a great mom! The lady of the lake is so patient and good. Lancelots a nightmare and basically relies on the magic ring she gave him to dispell magic, he uses the magic shield she gave him that boosts his fighting prowess, he cries and has her come and comfort him for days. Shes willing to speak for him when he goes nonverbal. She is literally the best mom ever I would be a mamas boy too it I were him.

Hes also a dunce. Unlike gawain who has the benifit of being clever and genuinely smart just rash and refusing to think things through, lancelot just doesnt understand SHIT. hes dumb. He does stupid things because he thinks itll make others happy. Hes just a mess.

His only concept of love ended up being guenevere so like. Keep that in mind. His idea of showing love is literally bleeding for the person and will tend to do absolutely stupid things in the name of love. Hes very desperate to feel loved but doesnt understand what it is and finds it in the wrong places. Its why he crawls back to elaine (the bad one) when he goes mad. Its why he refuses to break it off with guenevere. Its why he cant see gawain or galehauts advances. He straight up doesnt understand you can have love without bloodshed and feeling like absolute shit.

He doesnt know what taxes are.

Him and kay are actually like. Decently close in some legends? Which is so cute. Kays a good dad and sees this mess of a man and is like please dont do this. I like the dutch tale where kay gets his ass kicked on a quest and lancelot who missed what was actually happening went. Oh kay ill go. I dunno whats going on but !

His friendgroup is a nightmare. Half of them hate him (half the orkneys. Lionel kinda. Tristans a wild card) half of them love him (gawain and gareth. Bors and hector I guess. Dinadan. Tristan again is a wildcard.) its great. They crash at the joyous gard A LOT. dinadan tristan and gareth spend at least half a year at the gard while lancelots off eloping with galehaut in le morte so. Go off.

WAIT ANOTHER FUN FACT. Ok lancelot is french his family is from gaul but he wouldny actually have a french accent. Or know french. He grew up in a lake if he knew any second language it would be fae

Uhhh theres more but im in class rn but. Lemme know if u want any specifics :-) I like him.

[rhimorechill]

1-30 can i just have your opinion on all of them please

KDHSKHFKFB whoever u are anon ur actually my only follower ever

1. are you of the “tom nook is a crook” or “tom nook is an honest businessman” opinion ?

HES AN HONEST BUSINESSMAN !!! ur loans have NO interest and he was handing out 100k interest/month for a good while there !!!!! the only reason it dropped to 10k is b/c i accidentally made a mil while tryna get dreamies ok. the whole "nook inc owns the entire island" thing is KINDA WEIRD but like ! i mean. its still a pretty sweet deal

2. do you play as yourself or a made up character ?

i play as me !! and then everyone tells me my character is cute which ROCKS

3. where is your house located ?

well CURRENTLY. its just at the center of the island. but once i get terraforming (which will be as soon as i get lolly, mitzi, and purrl) it will be on its own little island in the middle of the island

4. who were your first villagers ?

hamlet and renee ! and bea and agent s and broccolo. oh and quillson. theyre all gone now but i moved bea into a friends island so i can visit her later !!

5. preferable method of earning bells ?

turnip runs babey !!! srsly i will pay like 500k tips and make a million in PROFIT (per run !!) its fucking awesome. i never use turnip exchange tho that shit website always stops telling me where i am in the queue

6. what villager personalities do you typically get along best with ?

i love all of them. so much. normal and lazy villagers might take the cake, but ankha was on my island for 2 days and nearly stole my heart, so snooty villagers r up there too. smug villagers ? like i mostly have experience w raymond b/c i fucking HATED quillson and keaton n ed i barely paid attention to (ed gets points tho. he shares my bday) but that goddamn nerd has a war with slugs. we love to see it. peppy villagers rock (i have THREE on my island rn... but ugh i gotta kick out merry sometime..... i love her but i just !! have too many). i CANNOT hate jock villagers those guys just wanna work out !!! and talk abt working out !!!! theyve done nothing wrong in their whole lives. uchi villagers are great too and cranky villagers r trying their best !!! every villager is good is what im saying. even quillson (i guess)

7. who is your current best friend in the game ?

MGHGSHGD felicity or raymond !!! they send me mail all the time and also i really like raymond. b/c hes such a fucking NERD of an accountant. and felicity was the first of my dreamies to move in so im 💚 when it comes to her...... SOMEDAY. lolly will also be my bff. lolly come home

8. is there a villager you want to get rid of ?

MERRY WHITNEY VELMA. PLEASE GO AWAY. U R ALL SWEETIES BUT NONE OF U MADE THE CUT. ONLY ONE OF U IS EVEN A CAT. (if you want whitney or velma pls dm me !!! someone asked for merry already but id love for them to be on islands where ppl love em)

9. do you hoard a lot of items ?

YES. i did a purge the other day and laid a fuckton of items out to give away. it did not fit and i had to shove some on the cliffs. i still have a big pile waiting to be taken. meanwhile my storage gets new items added

10. take medicine or save & restart ?

medicine is for chumps.

11. where is your favorite spot in your village ?

HMMMM i rlly like my entrance !!!! its rlly neat and has green AND pink mums + trees..... and fencing and a path. IDK i worked hard on it and think it turned out rlly well !!!! other than that maybe my shopping area ? i dont have terraforming yet so theres a lot i Havent Gotten To wrt my island (like my cliffs are almost entirely undeveloped b/c i havent placed any inclines. so theres no pathing)

12. what achievement do you want to hit the most ? (ex: golden equipment, all fish / bugs, etc)

its not REALLY an achievement but i want all my dreamies real bad. after that i want a 5 star island !! i would like a lily of the valley. or 20.

13. do you know any secret tips ?

HMMM i dont think so ?? i dont really know any secrets. ive been trying out campsite cycling and it has Not been going well tho. if u need tips on tting to move villagers out or smthn i can help w that !! this is such a vague q that im like DO i know smthn ??? that is a secret ?????? i also vaguely know abt *m**b* sp**f*ng but im not allowed to do that soooo. thats a pipe dream. fun fact: its not a secret but gardening is SO fucking complicated theres genetics n shit. its wild. thank god someone straight up gave me blue roses so i dont have to go thru that shit. also do not tt backwards when dealing with turnips. not even 30 mins to save ur 600+ prices frm closing time. They Will Change

14. who are your dreamies ?

THESE CATS (i know major shocker from tumblr user pumakittycat. app is acnh life)

15. favorite furniture item ?

HMMMM THIS IS A TOUGH ONE. maybe mum cushions ? those r cute as fuck. i love every flower item, honestly, frm garden wagons to flower stands to pansy tables to hycanith lamps to. idk the bonsai shelf ? i have one of those. i also love my sea globe. its great. WAIT DO RUGS AND WALLS/FLOORS COUNT THERES NO QUESTIONS ABT THOSE i love so many FUCKING items. also autumn woods wall, if ur out there,

16. favorite clothing item / outfit ?

my green clover dress !!!! its the best thing EVER. my full outfit also consists of a silver tiara, a cherry blossom pouchette, white fishnets, and green rubbertoed sneakers. and, ofc, clover facepaint. ALSO FOR CONTEXT. my island is named clover bay thats why im like Clover Time. Theyre Important To The Aesthetic. im also an aro bitch who loves overall dresses. b/c they slap

17. favorite museum room ?

I LOVE THE LITTLE BUTTERFLY ROOM do not even TALK to me unless ur the butterfly room in the museum THERES SO MANY AT ALL TIMES ITS SO NICE

18. cedar, fruit, or palm tree ?

FRUIT. i literally chopped down every single hardwood tree on my island and replaced them w orange trees

19. favorite fruit ?

.......Oranges

20. favorite fish ?

HM. bitterling has a special place in my heart for being my Only fish model. whale sharks also rock tho. and thats only of the ones ive caught !!! i also love frogs, turtles, and obligatorily catfish. oh and seahorses and bettas

21. favorite bug ?

HM. ladybugs maybe. and both birdwings ! maybe also emperors butterflies. possibly others as well

22. favorite flower breed ?

MUMS !!!!!

23. favorite crossbred rare flower breed + color ?

GREEN MUMS.

24. favorite villager personality ?

havent we been over this ? im a dumb bitch who likes all of them way too much

25. favorite time of day to play ?

i uh. play. all the time. i tt a Lot tho so i like setting my time to 1pm ? idk it Feels like a good time

26. favorite special visitor event or reward ? (ex: selecting an art piece from redd, aiding guliver and getting a special item, etc)

SAHARAH. im obsessed w the fucking rugs and the tickets and the lottery. i also love celeste, and gulliver has a spot on the faves list for providing lucky cats sometimes (also a fave item) and for having been to space

27. favorite kk song ?

call me basic, but bubblegum kk plays at all times in my living room

28. favorite animal crossing game ?

ACNH lmao. i never really sat down and got Dedicated to city folk, which is the only other game ive played

29. if you’ve played animal crossing before, are there any animals you’re nostalgic for ? if this is your first game, has any animal in particular left some effect on you ?

ROVERRRRR come home :( also harriet.... i Miss Her. and resetti (i REFUSE to use rescue services dont @ me). and also the bus driver guy who took u to the city. If You Were An NPC In City Folk I Miss You Now

30. share a story from your gameplay

SO. i love the little alien easter egg. i set up a photoshoot and made like a little storyline abt the aliens and stuff. i even got a flying saucer and put that down and used it. and every fucking time !!!! i do shit with aliens !!!!!!! gulliver shows up on my beach. i know he went to space in cf n stuff (I GOT FLAVOR TEXT ONE TIME-- DURING NH-- ABT HIM NOT WANTING TO GO BACK EVEN) so i think its fucking hilarious that the aliens show up.... so does he

[elftwink]

LUP and if you're cool with doing multiple, magnus, merle, and taako

i’m absolutely good to do multiple i love Having Opinions

LUP:

How I feel about this character: loml like IDEAL character god like not to show emotions i main but i cried when she was introduced and then she showed up and was just undeniably the coolest character on the podcast god BLESS

All the people I ship romantically with this character: lucretia or barry but like honestly to be honest with you. more w/lucretia and how much i even like barry and her relationship w/him is really more due to fan created content vs anything actually in the show, especially because literally we just dont hear anything about her feelings until they’re already together like griffin i get it its a big show theres a lot to cover but like. idk lup could have mentioned once that the feeling was mutual or something. this part should have been under unpopular opinion but whatever

My non-romantic OTP for this character: MAGNUS….. they r good friends

My unpopular opinion about this character: a tame opinion i have thats more just a hc is that i have is that she has a bob because she’s bisexual and also because chin-to-shoulder length hair is “just started transitioning and i need plausible deniability” culture and sometimes after that’s all done you’re like “this length isn’t bad as long as i properly cut and style it” and thats my proof. my other opinion is that i 100% honestly believe if she had switched places w/lucretia she would have done something similar and thats why she forgives lucretia so fast bc she understands the choice lucretia made. she would have executed it differently to be sure but like. same principle

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: interactions…… with lucretia….. more of them i am so starved ever since griffin said he wished we saw more of their friendship i have been in a pit of despair. give it to me

the rest are under a cut bc Long

TAAKO:

How I feel about this character: fucking superb you funky little wizard

All the people I ship romantically with this character: tbh mostly just kravitz. there are other ships im not against but honestly most other ships just sort of feel like….. like ppl just feel the need to ship taako w/every man to walk the earth and im over it, especially w/ppl he barely speaks to or to whom other members of the thb have better relationship dynamics

My non-romantic OTP for this character: ren!!!!!!! also davenport i feel like especially post canon they’re really close friends. also hurley. 

My unpopular opinion about this character: i DONT understand shipping him with sazed and i never have. for a long time i was CONVINCED there was going to be some brief mention of him being an ex or them being involved or even just of the relationship dyanmic being complicated or having a power imbalance favouring sazed or SOMETHING but literally all that happened was sazed got jealous and tried to poison taako. and like. idk was that backstory of watching 40 ppl die not traumatic enough for people? did we also need to add in that sazed was an abusive boyfriend? stop writing gay ppl suffering for entertainment

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: i fucking lie awake at night thinking about what would have happened if taako fell under the thrall of the gaia sash and magnus and taako had to help him and hurley and sloane came back right away as dryads and joined the team. it haunts me. he failed that will save and i wanted CONSEQUENCES. also b4 anyone is like “they’re immune” prove it.

MAGNUS

How I feel about this character: Projection Central tbh like……. travis and magnus both are like uncanny valley like me. like so much like me that it is sometimes deeply uncomfortable. anyway i love magnus 

All the people I ship romantically with this character: julia obvs and also avi like… me and 4 other ppl for that one

My non-romantic OTP for this character: lucretia like…. team human. also 100% magnus lucretia and lup are the dream team in every single way they are great friends and they compliment each other really well change my mind

My unpopular opinion about this character: honestly. i think he should have taken the chalice like first of all it would have been dope for gameplay second of all i think every day about the way that would have affected his character

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: kravitz sidequest in suffering game like is arms outstretched cool? yes. do you know what would have been cooler? a fucking sidequest through the astral plane. we are denied plot points because magnus refuses to die…. unbelievable. also i wish we got to see more of him post canon like bc his finale was when he died we missed out

MERLE:

How I feel about this character: dilf

All the people I ship romantically with this character: davenport and like. kind of john i guess but not as much

My non-romantic OTP for this character: probably lucretia also…… its important to me that lucretia has friends. also like. i think post canon merle is one of the first people to forgive her and hes most like he was during tsc with obviously more growth and so they get along like old friends the quickest and the most. honestly i really do think merle is charming in a very specific merle way and he gets along with so many people so its like. honestly everyone. the man tried to be friends with the hunger like the compassion……. the care for other ppl… the commitment to joy…… i fucking love merle

My unpopular opinion about this character: DILF. THE TAZ FANDOM IS AFRAID OF THE TRUTH BUT IM NOT

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: i always thought it was a weird choice to bring up merle’s arm during the chalice because it was played so much as a joke metatextually that it felt out of place next to the other two. especially knowing merle has backstory fodder too. i dont remember if they’d gotten to it yet. anyway i wish either they’d taken the arm thing more seriously the whole time or his option at the chalice was something else, i think the scene would have been more balanced. maybe it just felt out of place to deal with something we saw in game tho because the other two were backstory hooks. who knows.

then again griffin also brought up phandalin and they NEVER cared about that like it was always a joke so think partially it was griffin being like “CARE THESE ARE VERY SERIOUS THINGS THAT HAPPENED” so i guess thats fine. idk where im going with this.