#[im so sorry for her always]
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you know, you know. no gods, no masters, no kings on pedestals. everyone is fallible. death of the author. you know! you are balanced about your intake of media - you allow the wiggle room, the grace, the gratitude, the skepticism. nobody above criticism.
but still. a weird gut-punch feeling, something akin to betrayal. you read the article. surprise! an author you love is actually: a serial fucking predator.
well, shit. what now. no, you knew he was a person (all people are), but now you're wondering - what have i overlooked by accident? what messages have i internalized that are strange and cruel? and also, like, what the fuck?
his actions lay a thick glaze on top of everything. like each place is now ruined, opaque in a new way. but okay, fine, you've done this before. you knew better, right? you've been betrayed by many a cherished childhood author.
still, this stickiness. fuck. can you pick up that book again. will you read it to your children. you've recommended it to others - will you ever do that again? and of course, of course, no parasocial relationships. you were theoretically above this kind of sentiment. but the artist informs the art, right.
so it's not something as clear-cut as feeling he owed you, specifically (a stranger) better behavior - just that you kind of, in a distant and odd way... sort of trusted him to do better. it's not like a real trust or something speakable, just the faint hope that the product (good books) was a thin representation of the soul. now it feels like the product (good? books?) was a mask. in some small or insignificant way, your previous support of this person lent them power. your money and your time and your laughter.
and the thing is - you have this terrible, echoing sensation. how many times will this happen? over and over. you find out that the singer you love is actually a predator. you learn over drinks that your favorite high school english teacher is in jail for what he did to her. you listen to the news idly and suddenly discover that a woman you used to idolize has been abusing her kids for an actual eon.
what can you touch without the static melting off. you can't even really complain about it too much (you were supposed to know better, and besides, you don't want the same re-split "it's not your fault, love what you love" basic advice), but now it's here. somehow, it feels like - you let him into your life.
it's not that things need to be pure or an artist has to be like, endlessly perfect, mindful. demure. it's more just this terrible truth that has been replayed through your veins so often it feels criminally vain. power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely. did you want any one person to be worth that power?
it's just that he wrote books where he seemed to understand that. he seemed to know about hierarchies and unfair systems and bigotry and privilege. you thought they were books about what it means to struggle. you thought they were about having power and still using it for good rather than for control. he spooned you a narrative of being a good guy, a kind soul. you fucking bought what that fucking monster sold.
maybe that's why they were fantasies, after all.
#spilled ink#warm up#oh im .... sick to my stomach.#i talked to him. like ....... we talked. that man interacted with my poetry and writing.#that article.... gutwrenching. i am so sorry to everyone he's ever even been in the room with.#i feel.... like... unbearably. sick.#he acted like he was cool and friends with me!! we were cool internet writers together!!!!!#i feel sick for even having been polite to him.#i ...... am experiencing something so fucking complicated.#i wonder how many of u are feeling that too. like ''oh i sent him an ask and he was funny and sweet''#THATS HOW THEY GET U. ..... and YES I KNOW!!!#i am so fucking well-read about parasocial relationships. it would just be nice to like. trust that someone ISNT#hiding a huge fucking background of BEING A COMPLETE MONSTER. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK.#by the way i am not part of a fandom. this is “what the fuck i accidentally supported a rapist” not#“but my showww”. like i care far more about like. the human cost.#but also like... people are people. idk i saw a take on here about how nobody should mourn the books#and idk. people almost always reply to any scenario with their personal experience first -#''i knew him'' or ''wow i was just at that store'' or ''i grew up there'' or whatever. because that is how we establish connection &#emotional weight. that's just... a person thing. and there is a difference between 'oh this guy is a monster'' & the feeling of:#he's been a monster and i SUPPORTED THAT. i CELEBRATED him. i !!! a fucking victim myself!!!!!!!!! SUPPORTED . HIM.#i am sick. i feel so much pain for her and everyone he's ever hurt. saying ''the books are ruined'' is i think ... like how people say#they're shocked and disgusted by him. (obviously there's nuance here. im sure there's some creep doin it wrong. but u know. in general)#idk..... im an author. i understand my work is in your life in whatever small way. i understand that connection. it's real.
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scorched earth.
a comic about a princess who died in a fire.
(this is a sequel to bite of winter, a comic about Snow and what became of her after her death.)
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creative notes:
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all my other comics
store
#cw: blood#cw: beheading#cw:death#cw: gore#cw: burning alive#so nice of ash to have prepared a barbequed buffet ready for snow when she arrives#if it wasn't made clear enough ash did die in that fire#she just did it while taking down as many people as she could in the process. and now shes a smoke monster#and yes. the fire powers do imply she's not quite human. but shes human enough to fall in love and die and thats enough.#im sorry this comic took me so long. i had about a week where i was very depressed and nothing got done.#thank you for your patience#and as always#thank you for reading#comic art#sapphic art#lgbt#horror#somehow not as scary as snow but ash is still fearsome in her own way#stillindigo art#stillindigo comics
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I acknowledge that the season was cut almost in half so I should really cut them some slack but I WON'T, SO:
Plot holes/Forgotten Stuff in TUA:
(some of these are mostly just unanswered questions)
-Sloane?? Where tf did she go?
-Why was Jennifer (in the original timeline) in a cage? In Moldova?? Like, was she discovered to have something ( the dimaldo stuff whatever) inside of her, so they wanted to test on her? if she never came into contact with marigold before ben then why would they? WHAT
-also wait how the fuck did she get that stuff in her anyway? How did the dimaldo get to earth after it caused the end of Reginald's home planet? Like,,,shouldnt we know that?
-Her,,,in a squid??? she was Inside a giant squid? W h a t
-the S3 post credits of ben in the train. sure, whatever, that means nothing LMAOO
-I also can't get over - Five explaining "oh yeah when we do this EVERY ALTERNATE TIMELINE is gonna be destroyed, leaving only what should've been - the original," and lila fighitng to put her family in the train station,,,All the other timelines will be destroyed??They're dying and being reborn/reincarnated in the new one anyway GIRL WHAT ARE YOU DOING
(unless ive highly misunderstood that which is likely)
-this isnt a plot hole just - five "trying desperately over and over again to save his unhelpful family who he loves very very much" being literally turned into,,,that. did someone say character assassination?
-lila and five. thats a plot hole in and of itself I DONT CARE if he's aged 12 years from season 3, (6 yr timeskip at beginning of season, then 6 technically 7 in teh train), I DONT CARE IF HES 25 NOW, I DONT CARE IF HES MENTALLY 60 SOMETHING. Lila met and spent time with him when he looked like THIS
THATS A CHILD. and clearly, the family had SOME contact in the 6 yr skip, so she WATCHED HIM GROW UP from 13 - 19, like thats just so WEIRD WHAT
this was supposed to be plot holes and just turned into me being pissed im sorry but HOW DO YOU FUCK UP AN ENDING THIS BAD??
#i am genuinely astounded#HOW DO YOU FUCK UP THIS BAD#i miss season 1#klaus you were a standout as ever#so sorry your entire plot was away from the family AGAIN#like EVERY SEASOn#five stans im so sorry#diego deserved so much better#i liked allison more than last season but i cannot forget her SA'ing luther so shes still on my shit list#viktor i will always love you And i am free every saturday at 7#tua#tua season 4#tua s4#the umbrella academy#the umbrella academy season 4
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Doodle dump!
Brainrot so bad i made a fanchild 💀💀💀
Also dont ask me why i have tons of colored sketches in such a short amount of time im also freaking myself out 💀
#digital art#my art#artwork#cove holden fanart#olba mc#olba cove#olba fanart#olba#our life mc#our life: beginnings & always#our life beginnings and always#our life#gb patch games#cove holden x mc#cove holden#cove x oc#cove x mc#DAD COVE DAD COVE#olba cliff#cliff holden#leandra last#elizabeth last#idk if theres a tag for the moms im sorry 💀#i read a fic where cove and the mcs kid is just another cove and i thought that was so fucking funny#tho i wanted to atleast have one resemblance from the mom#kori and her peircing gold eyes
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um..everyone say hi to Zenna, she's my final ts3 sim i was able to revive
#ZENNA THE WOMAN THAT YOU ARE#I- I FRICKEN LOVE HER#she was always my fave..im sorry camren#i've not edited in a while cos..perfectionism is haunting me#but like simblr is meant to be my fun place so#lemme stop comparing myself hehe#and just have all the FUN#sims 3 edit#ts3 edit#the sims 3
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the crows would have absolutely loved monopoly
#i feel so sad they never got to play#au where all they do. every day. is play monopoly#thats the heist thats the plot#them enjoying and bickering#all six of them#cuz all six are happy and alive#(im ignoring kiwi sorry guys)#kaz would get waaaaaay too into it#wylan would be incredible#he memorises the property names based off the colours#nina doesnt even care about winning she just buys the properties that kaz goes for#they never let jesper be banker even though he begs to be every time#the only person who can be banker is matthias#inej secretly moves her piece extra steps during other people's turns and only kaz realises#but he doesn't say anything even though he wants to win#the winner is almost always either kaz or wylan#inej comes close a few times#jesper has never once won but still claims he's best#nina tries to seduce matthias into giving her more money#it (almost) never works#soc#six of crows#ck#crooked kingdom#kaz#inej#kaz brekker#kanej#matthias helvar#jesper
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me n moze say good morning to the world !!! ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ
art by @rabbbitseason of course <3
#₊⋆ 𝓪 𝓬𝓻𝓸𝔀’𝓼 𝓼𝓸𝓵𝓪𝓬𝓮 ༉ •̩̩͙ ⋆꙳❅#🐦⬛🐕 .#<-#hehe i took inspo from kai’s rb of my mb:>#MY FIRST MOEVIE COMM#this is queued#im asleep (at least i should be by the time this is posted) but it’s a mystery as to how i will fall asleep knowing i would have to#close my eyes and not actively stare at this for the rest of my life#full factory reset i really don’t know what i would even say to this 🥹 im just#things i would do for bitti : anything! i cannot think of something i wouldn’t do for her#i gave her the most cursed ref known to mankind and she came up with this im so 🥹 thank you so much … your art blows me away every time ….#i may pass out seeing him in your style … the way you did his hands and he’s so big#this is me -> ໒꒰ྀི o̴̶̷̤ ̯o̴̶̷̤ ꒱ྀི১ at this HSJDNCN aaaaaa 🥹#i will also state the very obvious and say that bitti is such a pleasure to work with ajsnxnkck ….. please im on my knees#when i saw this- my stomach literally flipped inside out and my ears were ringing .. and my heart was beating a million beats per second#if bitti’s comms were open for eternity & i won the lottery- i would commission so many mozes ….. the world would be full of bitti’s mozes.#^ though that sounds terrible for bitti … im so sorry#i swear that won’t happen i would never do that to you#he is sooooo yum in your style (severe & outrageous understatement)#but what i can do is stare at this all day#THANK YOU BITTI UEUEJJSJS 🥹🥹🥹 I HOPE UR PILLOWS R ALWAYS COLD !!!#not even aventurine’s shield can protect me from the 100000000 damage i took from this /pos#such a shield doesn’t exist in the hsr realm or the real world !!!#IM KIND OF ANGRY THAT I KNOW THERES NOTHING I CAN SAY TO EXPRESS HOW I FEEL !!!!! WHAT COULD I SAY >:#WHAT AN ODD FEELING WHERE I AM reduced to my knees but from positive emotions alone …#im so dizzy /pos let me stop here this is already so long omg 🥹#edit: dude /gn my screen time is gonna skyrocket because im still staring with such a dopey smile on my face ahsndnxkc gosh im happy :’) th#thank you so much bitti …. this means so much to me#i literally can not put into words how much this has made my entire year :’)) im so soft im so happy
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im back losing my mind about her but i will NEVER shut up about how much respect and trust tp zelda has for link who is essentially just some guy she just met (as a wolf at that) and how she always makes it a point to kneel to be at his level while he’s in wolf form and then bowing to him at the end like. ugh my girl
#this also applies to midna#she surrendered the kingdom to not die and probably try to find a solution to the matter but#finding herself in a position where she cannot do that she puts her full trust in both midna and link#mind you midna at the beginning seems to not be fond of her and zelda probably knows this#yet she still trusts her to the point of saving her live while basically sacrificing herself#like she might as well be dead u know#i always think that kindness is inherently a Princess Zelda trait and this is true with her too#so i hate when ppl treat her as cold or anything like that like yes she has five mins of screen time but#they say a lot about her#this became a long tag rambling IM SORRY#zelda#link#midna#tp zelda#tp link#twilight princess#tp#loz#tloz
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sally and percy were always each other’s constants, they became a bit more distant once percy found out he was a demigod, but they were still each others firsts
then estelle was born
percy loves estelle so much, so much it physically hurts
but he sees estelle and how happy she is, how she had a mom that doesnt work the night shift nearly every night and instead is home nearly all the time, and she has a dad that’s present and there and is safe and percy is so so happy that she has what he never did
but at the same time he knows thats the exact reason why it hurts
estelle has what percys wanted his whole life
and now estelle has the only thing percy had his whole life
being his mothers first and top priority
he knows why, he understands why, estelle is a baby and needs to be cared for constantly, and percys nearly 18 and doesnt need his mom all the time anymore
but it hurts because all the food is no longer blue, it hurts because he sees estelle grow up and get help, it hurts because he sees estelle with the life he always wanted, but knows he will never had
and it hurts because hes no longer his mother’s constant.
sally has paul now, she has paul to help her through her issues and she has a child that doesnt get expelled from every school shes been in
and percy has his family. but its not the same. annabeth has always been there, but she doesnt understand, thalia has been through the same childhood as percy but she doesnt know what its like to watch the bad go to good in the same household, grover has always listened but he just doesnt understand
because hes happy estelle has the life he always wanted. hes glad his mother has the life she always wanted. but hes not in that life. because hes moving out soon. and hes no longer his mothers son, at least not in the way he was before
#i would apologize but im actually not sorry#he used to come home from anything and his mother would be there in an instant#checking him over and making sure hes ok#then estlelle is born#and he loves her so so much#but now when he comes home sally is on the couch holding estelle gently#and she can only pay so much attention to her son#and listen. i love sally#i really do#shes the best mom there was#however#she can no longer be that perfect safe space she once was#to other demigods? she is still that safe space#but thats all theyve known her#but percy has seen sally risk everything for percy#and while hes so happy she longer has to#theres still that empty and painful feeling#and it just gets worse when he sees estelle living the life he always dreamed of#pjo#percy jackson#sally jackson#estelle blofis#estelle and percy#jackson-blofis family#they have so much angst potential i love it#pjo angst#percy jackson angst#reef says#reef angst#percy and sally
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idk if im finishing this falin but i like the dragon part enough.hrmm
#its the fuckng chicken part that always gets me.the down...oohmy god#and the junction btwn her waist and its chest like idont know why but its so hard#also i didnt have an idea in mind w this one and im hating the grey bg.RAAH#falin#dunmeshi#lg doodles#also hate tht the anatomy here is so inconsistent#but im also trying to get into the mindset of like..ok so its not right or whatever .big deal id rather draw smth anyways#but its liike.IDKONT KNWOWWW anyways sorry im just complaining but i do like the color blocking#enough
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I hate to ask this of you if you’re not taking request since I know you’ve been getting a lot of asks lately, but I really love the bits of characterization you give everyone in your art and am just. Eating up every last crumb in your doodles…so would it be too much to ask if you would draw the OG champions (Cynthia, Lance, Steven, Wallace, & Diantha if you feel like it) interacting or doing something together? I don’t ask for more than that, it can be whatever you want and range from a silly/casual activity to something more formal. I just really love them together and you’ve fed the champion fandom so well lately, thank you for that 🥺🙏🏻❤️
(Whether you’re up to fulfill this request or not, I appreciate you so much for giving love to some of the lesser appreciated characters of Pokemon!!)
Read the word formal and blacked out
#THNAK YOUUUU THANK YOUT HANK TOUEXPLODES YOU#diantha didnt make the cut. im sorry 4 characters were so many#i wouldve loved to draw her in a formal dres….idk if i couldve done her justice </3#if you look st this for too long you’ll realise i dont know how formal events work so dont do that#i was gonna draw lance wearing his suit jacket as a cape but 1. forgor 2. i think wallace wouldve stopped him#art tag#champion cynthia#champion lance#champion steven#steven stone#forgot he gets a last name#champion wallace#or uh#gym leader wallace#ohmykgd i couldbe drawn their pokemon in the backgroud. i always forget about their pokemon#no im not drawing a garchomp and metagross nevermind#pokemon
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sometimes i wonder what's it like to have to go through school again when you're 50k years old
#honkai impact#fu hua#kiana kaslana#raiden mei#bronya zaychik#spring traveler outfit is always so funny to me like.#it's an immortal supersoldier celestial being whatever#wearing this teen outfit and cargo pants.#thats so based of her.#like im sorry but no lifelong mission would make me do school again.....
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i would advise against sneaking a bunch of silly billies into your castle
#project sekai#emu otori#nene kusanagi#tsukasa tenma#rui kamishiro#pjsk#proseka#prsk#polysho week 2023#there that wasnt so bad#i hate taaaagging#Saki chortling her ass off btw. Do They Know#snailing towards drawing backgrounds properly... its helpful for my comms but im still so bad....#My emu favoritism shines theough again in that its obvious i drew her first. Im sorry. kind of.#i dont have insane tags to put this time i have to get up for class in like 7 hours. i have a midterm. farewell....#actually how could you put polysho week during my midterms. SICK. (ignored that i couldve used the time prompts r given in advance to draw)#ive always done this for fanweeks i try to draw on the day of like a sicko. INEED TO GONTOSLPEY#please stop following me if i check and i hit a milestone im going to feel bad. i dont look at it often enogub to cstch them when they happ#en. stop being niceys to me.#i was thinking of doing simple rqs or something... bc im grateful and it would be fun..... waugh....#why didi stay up finishing this. my wrist hurts and im sleepy. Lord.
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fiona gallagher // "i bet on losing dogs" by mistki
#fiona gallagher#shameless#fiona and her kids#fiona and monica#parentification#fiona gallagher’s childhood#parentified child#ami weaves a web#another sad fiona edit sorry!!!! SORRY#except not sorry. not really. lol#i have had this rattling around my head for days just needed to put it out there#mistki#mitski lyrics#making myself sad with this one folks!#also oh my god this was so hard to color match sorry if the editing looks shitty#EVERYTHING FROM SEASONS 1-3 ARE BRIGHT YELLOW AND EVERYTHING ONWARDS IS TWILIGHT BLUE KICKING AND SCREAMING#WHYYYYY#anyways!#particularly emotional about this fi and debbie scene oh goddd the way she’s cupping her cheek just makes me want to cry#GOD I JUST ..#TELL YOUR BABY THAT IM YOUR BABY !!!!!!!!!#i bet on losing dogs is just SO fiona gallagher coded#but also?? ELDEST DAUGHTER CODED IN GENERAL#GODDDDD#i always want you when i’m finally fine too#for a while i’m just. this is okay. everything is fine. and then BAM#I WANT TO BE MY PARENTS CHILD AGAIN PLEASEEEEE PLEASE PLEASE LEKALSLLLSLSLSLKDDK LET ME BE YOUR BABY !!!!!!!#PLEEASASSEREEEEEEEE#SOBBING AND CRYINF
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it's COLD
#anthro#furry#fursona#safe fur work#civetworks#its the civet in civetcider that i dont draw much anymore#you can tell cuz ive had her since 2018 and made split in 2023 but they have the same amount of drawings on TH#sorry coffee im an ape person now#still always draw her to get outta an artblock tho#background is a lil lazy but it was for fun so IDGAF!!!!!!!!!!!!
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we don’t talk enough about how grassland romance is the equivalent to the shared dream sylus and mc had in the myth. all they’ve craved in the past is a place where they can simply exist and love each other freely. a place where they can share the domesticity of being a couple and learn how to love, and one where said love wouldn’t be shunned upon. one where they’re exchanging the softest of kisses in endless fields of daturas without a worry because his beloved isn’t cursed to be his arch nemesis. even if it was a dream, deep inside, it was something they both wanted, and cherished for the rest of their lives.
sylus, the leader of onychinus, was so ready to leave everything behind, including his extravagant lifestyle in order to be with mc, without as much as a second thought. “i can adapt to any location and call it home, as long as i’m willing … but, now i have a condition. if you’re not there, then i’m not interested.” “i told you, i’m not interested adapting to a place if you’re not there” …. something about the verbal confirmation that comes so easy to him that’s extremely comforting. home is simply wherever she is and it’s more because the person than the place. grassland romance is the turning point of their relationship and it’s shown in the gentleness and softness that’s freely exchanged between them. the way he learns the native language so he has plenty of ways to express his feelings to her and the way he is so happy to not only introduce her as his lover, but show it through sincere actions.
#guys im so sorry but it had to be said .#i will always lead the sylus loverboy agenda idc idc that’s the most loverboy coded guy ever omg#he loves her sm i just know he smiles a bit everytime a parallel occurs but they’re way happier in this life time#⋆˚࿔ bea writes .ᐟ₊⊹#love and deepspace#sylus#qin che#love and deepspace sylus#lnds#lnds sylus#l&ds#l&ds sylus
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