#[ AND WELL OFF I WENT I GUESS ]
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Sometimes I want to bring Morrigan but then I remember I play as a face-tanking rogue and I bring Wynne. Warden Cousland, Morrigan, Wynne / Dragon Age Origins (c) Bioware
#dragon age#dragon age fan art#comic#morrigan#warden cousland#healer#bioware#dao#dragon age origins#hero of ferelden#cousland#wynne#I'm back. I guess.#I did not notice at first but apparently I took a break from tumblr. I've already had several breakdowns over the dashboard.#(turns out I was on the 'for you' tab rather than the 'following' tab. the theme had changed as well. absolutely insufferable.)#I've felt really unconnected for a while but it actually feels better now? as if my tumblr mutuals was the missing link.#very healthy and hot of me ngl#so. I had a two week holiday this year and they were instantly slurped up. it went so fast!#there was this big football thing the week before my holiday - basically teams of teens come from all around the world to play etc.#I heard a girl tell her teammates that 'I'd love to travel on this bus every morning; happy people all around you; just add some music...'#she was also very excited when the bridge opened. the 'happy people' around her sighed bitterly and leaned back for a ten minute wait.#it is thankfully over now. the bus home is no longer stuffed full of football teams. but it's a fun experience for the players etc etc etc#well. in other thrilling news I went to spy on our sister shops during my time off. to see what they do differently. maybe steal some ideas#one store was like an instagram post with fancy teacups and stylish outfits. who knew a second-hand store could be so boring.#the other was like a man-cave with furniture and a passively-aggressive note by the toys stating that 'if u break it u pay. idiot. tnx<3'.#the man-cave was my favourite :)#rant over now! take care and bye etc!
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Continuation of my other post here, the autobots have come close to figuring out that Optimus is the sire but Optimus is way too moral to spark up an subordinate so they don’t look into it more
Skywarp stole the evidence, Ratchet doesn’t notice cause he and Optimus are too busy with the baby for any fun private parties
#Skyfire: hey guys lately sometimes I feel like someone is glaring at me#Ratchet is considering just telling everyone before Optimus goes insane that his special ops team can’t figure this out#any weaker mech would go feral with these protocols plus the matrix but Optimus is Optimus so he’s holding up pretty well#wheeljack put bumblebee in place of where he thinks people would place him#hes not putting himself on the list lmao rip bumblebee though at least the sparkling is too big for people to believe it#me shoving my rare pairs in here#Thundercracker guessing bumblebee cause they interfaced before and got he a pregnancy scare#he was less worried about the sparkling and more worried about Starscream knowing he bottomed#to bumblebee#Skyfire messaged Starscream about Wheeljack but don’t ask STARSCREAM for dating advice he sucks at that#I wanted to have Starscream say something about starfire getting his old teacher pregnant but he’s already yapping a lot#off topic but some of my WIPS in my Ratchet folder went missing rippp#milk comic I will finish you even if god doesn’t want me too#transformers#ratchet#optimus prime#transformers fanart#optiratch#Starscream#thundercracker#skywarp#megatron#command trine#prowl#wheeljack#this is stupid#I LEARNED HOW TO HYPERLINK ON MOBILE#transformers g1
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Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~
(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)
#ootd#jfashion#fashion#fantasy fashion#mori kei#....like... adjacent... lol#no idea what style this would be lol.. makes me think of like whimsical vaguely fantasy themed childrens book character#finally posting one of my aforementioned seven million drafts of actual outfits and costumes i have finished and edited#the photos for but just never feel like posting lol..#I need to find one of those people whos like 'omg i am ADDICTED to social media ugh i wish i could get off of it#im just browsing and posting like 60 times a daaaaay!!!' and take a little magical bottle and suck some of the social media#enthusiasim out of them. for moi. In exchange they can have some of my 'literally just never in the mood to post or interact with the#outside world ever' energy. We can balance each other. huzzah and so on#Though I think maybe it's part of the general thing I've heard of like.. I can't remember if it was in reference to adhd or just some sort#of general execcutive functioning issue type of thing - but the idea that things have to be ''just right'' before you do something. like#'oh i need to do this task. but i have to wait until XYZ first' or 'oh i can do this but only if X specific condition is met' or etc#The fact that I even have to be in a Specific Mindset to post. or sometimes will delay posting on social media because like 'oh well#I'm going somewhere tomorrow. somehow this matters. i cannot spend 5 minuts posting TONIGHT. clearly it will interfere#somehow schedule wise with the doctor appointment i have 15 hours from now. yes. yes. i must wait until my appointment is over#tomorrow afternoon. THEN i shall post' or etc. etc. lol. NOT even taking into account the many days#I just genuinely and physically sick and it's not even a mental thing. I just physically dont feel like sitting at the computer lol..#ANYWAY.. trying to get back into it. trying to get a business bank account.. make a proper paypal so i can start selling sculptures again.#selling clothes and sculptures.. posting about such things then of course as one must. etc... chanting to hype up and motivate myself lol#But yes. this is my favorite outfit out of the bunch so I am posting it first I guess.. maybe others later..#Also the purple dress says its from shein. which I've heard is bad fast fashion stuff. but maybe okay since its second hand? I havent#been to the bins since like 2020 or late 2019 even. and I think stuff like shein and temu has only become poular in the past few years#but I bet if I went to the bins now I might would find a good handfull of that stuff. Probably now not much different than what you#find in a walmart or a forever 21 or actual physical stores you can go to though. I hear quality of clothing is down everywhere no matter#where you get it or whatnot. What bountiful joys unfettered capitalism and exploitation bestows upon us (<being sarcastic).#Wearing one of my favorite little vests though. I love the texture of it and the clasps on it
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I try to generally be constructive and engaged with the show I love on here, so on this day, I’ll just say that one of the most thematically important aspects for me from the original ATLA is Aang’s emotional core of real shame for running away when he was hurt by the monk’s decision to send him away. People who feel the kind of deep-seated shame that Aang feels from this decision can understand how that kind of all-encompassing shame is not built around a simple failure or a lie they tell themselves; it’s constructed from real misbehaviors and transgressions of their own sense of ethics—lashing out, telling lies, attempting to hurt others intentionally—that then have consequences (abuses, abandonments, or deaths) which seem to far exceed their expectations or even basic logic.
The combination of the misbehavior with exaggerated existential punishments (along with a lack of support and amend-making in the immediate wake of the events) is what transforms a sense of guilt (I fucked up) into shame (I am a forever fuck-up). Then shame, that sense of being a secret monster ‘no matter what I do or how good everyone thinks I am,’ invites all the avoidance strategies (Aang puts on big smiles, makes lots of jokes, constantly tries to make everyone happy, hops from town to town without building deeper connections). One doesn’t want to acknowledge one’s true feelings or let others in to see those feelings and experiences because it’s too painful to face the grief at the same time that you have to look at yourself for being responsible—even when you recognize it wasn’t totally your fault. It’s just that if you had just been good, less emotional, less human, then maybe the world wouldn’t be so messed up. Of course, in a zen view of things, the world will always be messed up in the same way it will always be beautiful. These are constant facts that always coexist in balance, and this is the truth that Aang learns and that undergirds the whole series.
So I always loved that Aang ran away. It was his sin and his salvation. And it becomes this constant tension for the series—he gets hurt in Bato of the Water Tribe and starts to run away from Katara and Sokka, he runs away to the Guru in the Crossroads of Destiny and his best friend is attacked, he and the gaang retreat after the Day of the Black Sun failure, he runs away to meditation in Sozin’s Comet when everyone wants him preparing for war. Aang’s reluctance to be a hero and the attachments and petulance for which he gets criticized are what metamorphasize to become his most noble attributes. They allow him to empathize with others shame and, ultimately, wield the kind of compassion that can deconstruct the power and perfectionism of imperialism.
So yes, Aang ran away from his temple 100 years ago. It wasn’t the mentally healthy choice. It wasn’t the ethical choice. It wasn’t the wise choice. It was human and emotional and shameful and real. Aang is a better character for it. ATLA is a better show because of it. And we are better people when we understand these kind of tragic emotional experiences that people are trying so hard to grow through.
#aanglove#vague posting about the nf adaptation lol#I won’t go off in my posts but I will in my comments#only 17 minutes in tbh#and already amazed at realizing how cool it was that the of series wasn’t told in a linear style lol#I do think the casting department went off for the nf series tho#the kid playing aang is so perf#and all the actors fit their parts so well#but the show doesn’t understand or seem interested in depicting colonial violence at alllll#and the language of the fire nation wanting to ‘take over the world’ is so much more marvel than a colonial rhetoric#and then aang just wanting to ‘go get some air’ to clear his head…😑#we aren’t allowed to have problematic protagonists anymore I guess#only people with perfect mental health strategies allowed in young adult fiction#because we view fiction from a moralistic standpoint now instead of an empathetic one#but 🤷🏻♀️
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can we PLEASEEEEE talk about nico sturm's white boy swag PLEASE. like what was that. why were the sharks so intensely hiding his white boy swag. "oh we got him for his face offs" WHAT ABOUT HIS WHITE BOY SWAG. imagine if the sharks had not made a holiday music video we would not have never known about nico sturm's insane white boy swag. ik you all are consumed with thing1 and thing2 and also thing3 and thing4 but what was going on with nico sturm in that video, we need to discuss. why was he the only one giving it's big and i know what to do with it energy. ON THE SHARKS?? HELLO
ALSO. cody ceci can't rap nor should he ever again get his ass off the mic but he DID sound like an npr show host. he has the smooth tenor of a man telling me on all songs considered that this all-female octogenarian shoegaze quartet is going to be playing at hardly strictly bluegrass this year. or like a guy who was an overnight host for a classical music station. he's telling me he's got gershwin to accompany me through the cold winter night. he's signing off with an instrumental version of "st. james infirmary" at 6am. he calls his listeners his "lovers" and gets away with it bc the only people who listen to overnight classic music stations are lonely old men and particularly unwell college students. ohhhh cody ceci you're wasted as a dman you should be romancing old men
#HEAVILY REDACTED BUT I FEEL NICO'S BDE IS THE REASON MARIO HAD TO LIE AND SAY HE'D BEEN YAPPING TOO MUCH#guys i woke up so evil this morning i think i spent six solid hours airing my grievances to ko until i realized it was because my feet#were cold and had been all day. went to beryl and said beryl my feet are cold and beryl said well i think wool socks are going to be#better for you in this climate than cotton and i said WHAT DO YOU MEAN I NEED A NEW WARDROBE FOR AN ENTIRELY NEW CLIMATE#like i did have a winter coat and winter boots to be clear but?? so i made a large wool sock purchase and a smaller slippers purchase#and can i state for the record i did live in baltimore for four years over a decade ago when snow was real. i did live in a colder climate#than the bay area winters i have become accustomed to#but looking back i just have no memory of how i survived that. friends from ohio telling me how to dress i guess#keats got a new parka too. but i bought that before i realized i was cold. but if HE'S cold I'M cold#i think ko heard like every complaint under the sun. i think i invented new things to be cheesed off at as i was going#except the 15 minute interlude where i turned to k and popped off about how the sharks treat goosh#but if i start talking about that again the sap center is in danger of becoming a new feature in the wetlands#fine i will be brave and say it. i think nico said ok if you lost your adhd fidget toy (phone) then i will give you a new one (his dick)#BYE. BYE#fresno oilers.txt#my feet are cold :(#fresno oilers.write
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ms and mr divorce
#zero escape spoilers#zero escape#akane kurashiki#junpei tenmyouji#junepei#i guess. strickly speaking i don't ship them i'm here specifically for the divorce#ztd got me really excited at the start and then went into the opposite direction of what i wanted but oh well. hcs time#considering how things ended with mira and eric nothing surprises me#also yes i got super lazy with this because im trying to fight off an artblock#art tag
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i want to delete my twitter account so fucking bad
#i grew my following off of anime stuff and now i'm into completely different stuff and i feel like posting about it -#will alienate my audience way too much#(if you wanna know - these days i hardly even watch one anime a year)#i wanna post about the fuckin saw movies and postal and weird video games and metalocalypse and music i like#and i want to post about my ocs without it feeling like i'm speaking gibberish to a crowd#but none of my followrs GIVE A FUCK#also i find it impossible to make friends on twt 😭😭😭😭 i have like 5 mutuals i'd consider friends#but alas i have too many industry pro followrs to just deactivate#and 40k followers is invaluable as someone whose only form of income rn is comms#tumblr has similar problems but at least i can talk about my ocs properly cuz of tagging#i don't like how monetized my account has become it feels so fucking disingenuous#it's just retweet retweet retweet post art retweet retweet#if twitter went under it'd be a blessing in disguise for me#oh well. suffering from success i guess#maybe one day i'll move accounts and KILL STARRYSHARKS ONCE AND FOR ALL#this is all 13 yr old me's fault#sorry for ranting/venting ig??? on main lol
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do you think the reason agatha’s trial felt weird is because she was the only one who did not actually buy into the mythos of the road since she knew the truth? like that was why no perspective change and all the other reasons why people thought it was a fake trial
#agatha all along#aaa spoilers#txt#i really liked the idea behind how the witches road came to be#like showing her and nicky coming up with the lyrics and everything#but i felt like there was a lot of these last two episodes that felt weird or jarring#i think that’s partly the fault of it being such a short run time for the whole show in general (tbh that’s probably like most of it)#but there were just also weird choices? idk#like jen’s big declaration about protecting them in honor of Lilia or w.e and then just.. flying off to nowhere??#or the way Both billy and agatha kept switching how they felt about each other with like every sentence#I did really like her thing where she helped him get tommy a body though#and her and rios vibes were off too. like it felt like there should have been a little more build up before they fought after the road?#like when they were still talking on the road it felt like they could have done more with it#just like jen getting her powers back could have been more#or billy standing up for agatha could have been more#billy’s homecoming and attempting to banish agatha too#I liked that his parents were there but it was so quick and then he just.. leaves again?? no problem?? and I guess they’re fine with it now#like it felt like the things they did well. they did really well#while everything else felt.. idk.. kinda flat?#which honestly was the same feeling I had after watching agatha’s trial episode#honestly this show need at least another 3 or 4 episodes if not more#and I know people are going to make this all about agatha and rio but i really don’t think that’s the issue#i do think the story could have benefited more from showing more of their actual backstory or a few more interactions with them or just#like i said earlier done more with what they had. again that scene on the road before rio dips could have been used way more effectively#and I don’t mean in like having them be soft or lovey like I know a lot of people wanted (never be against that) but I don’t think it was#needed.. but Something was??#i feel like overall what everyone went through on the road didn’t actually truly effect them or change them?#like jen left. agatha and rio were like back to liek the road never happened. everyone else but billy is dead#i think the only person who was truly changed was maybe billy?#which makes the whole journey feel so unsatisfying? like things could still have ended the same while still showing them changed? idk
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I've cracked the Wonder Egg Priority code
Look at em
Same guy
#ive been saying from day one#wonder egg priority#metaphor re:fantazio#you can even say#its a metaphor ~#wonder egg priority was an IP animation about.... well everyone thought it was about fighting puberty demons in your sleep#but then it went off the rails with like robots and mind uploads and alternate death dimensions or something#idk#anyway their resemblance is too uncanny#metaphor refantazio#if i have to summarize wonder egg succinctly i guess it's#magical girls with gender dysphoria resenting having to perform gender
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its probably meant to be somewhat ambiguous but it seems most likely that armand was gaslighting louis so that he didn't trust himself and daniel didn't trust him. he also seemed to basically get what he wanted by instigating a fight and igniting some passion, we see by next ep's start it probably got resolved with sex and absolution. idk the talamasca angle is not as interesting a story
Ask is in reference to this post: HERE
That's cool. You're able to hold that I'm able to hold mine. Interpretations are just that. I will say it doesn't matter whether Armand planted them, or not, because he still ends up gaslighting Louis in the 2x04 argument anyway. It’s effectively gaslighting even if they are telling the truth here as they see it because of how things stack up and what's said.
It is basically how you said, and I'll just go ahead and expand for anyone who might not see it so clearly. Initially, it seems he's more or less trying to just get Louis off his case for the photos, and is willing to throw him, his mental state, and character under the bus, to do so. But Louis already straight up knows him of doing manipulative things, of this exact sort, in the interview before this event even occurred - Namely that Armand is making himself look far more approachable, and better to Daniel, even after they'd both agreed to basically tear this guy to shreds, which makes Louis look worse by default, and goes against what they agreed to both do. Armand has a repeated tendency to fall through on his promises, or promise things, but then take it his own direction when it suits him. In all cases, he does keep obstructing Louis interview, especially when it comes to Daniel, and won't fully admit to it. - this is why Louis' so reactive, among just the fact he has trauma related to being denied his own interiority, fullness, and freedoms, because he's Black, and in society, seen less human. Armand simply doesn't help his case by denying it, even if it were actually his truth that the photos weren't his doing. (Note; Armand has also faced horrific dehumanizing traumas, but in such a differing way I don't think he's able to empathize with the same way Louis been dehumanized in life. I argue a little if Louis is even able to do more than simply hold a lot of sympathy for Armand, as they really are not a lot alike in both their interior and exterior reality. I don't think that sympathy goes both ways often.)
The way he's also keeps behaving like the bigger person in this reinforces the belief Armand wants out of Louis, making him 'see' it, and probably also to Daniel as well who's definitely overhearing this (this particular part has a chance of being unintentional however, if he was only really intending to deescalate, but it still keeps the same effects).
Not only making Louis look like he's crazy to assume it, but denying he'd been doing anything wrong of the sort (by simply at no point coming forward and saying something reassuring of Louis reality along the lines of, 'I have been doing those things, it's just not this, and those weren't my intentions to hurt you with it, I'm sorry' or simply 'okay, I did it, sorry'). As well, it doesn't matter how much Armand's truthful, Louis is someone who necessarily does need reality checks like that, because he suffers from hallucinations, and as he's finding out, memory lapses, and not providing them will make him jump to presume it could be his own symptoms. Also, at one point in the argument, he actually throws out that Louis is insane, if it needed to be anymore obvious. Which is derogatory, if arguably true, though reinforces that Armand's behaviors to 'stop or aid his madness' in prior instances were all a-okay, and all necessary. There's nothing wrong with him, and what he's doing, its all Louis. (His intentions to deescalate, if anyone wants to take on that idea, would've changed by then. It reads as a pattern to me mimicking of the promises falling through.)
Anyway, I'd be saying in my interpretation that him willing to keep this up, even though the photos had nothing to do with it, just shows how much he'd actually use any situation that arises to manipulate/control Louis, and mess with Louis interview, as opposed to orchestrating or planning situations, so he can then also manipulate with it. With all intentions or not, it doesn't really matter. Which makes his manipulation more realistic, honestly. A better portrait of who Armand is tbh.
I don't claim this transcript as 100% accurate, but it's as close as I can get it:
L: Four Fred Steins in the album, four. You made me look foolish.
A: You just assume it was me.
L: Well, it wasn’t me.
A: You sure about that?
L: Excuse me?
A: I take it back.
L: Take it way fucking back.
A: It was probably an honest mistake from the staff.
L: You think I need to be coddled, hyped up, lied to?
-cut-
A: You’re being Lestat!
L: Go call on him, see what happens.
A: A little ridiculous… It's the staff, dear.
L: I’m being ridiculous? You wanna see, you wanna see ridiculous?
A: No, Louis, it was an honest mistake. You knew it.
L: AAAH
A: You weren’t here-
L: LA LA LA LA
A: -And more and more of them-
L: LA LA
A: They got through!
-flashbacks-
A: This isn’t about Lestat!
-more flashback-
L: You lobbed at Daniel, and disrespected me.
A: no no no no no no.
-flashback-
L: and over and over and over it’s always the same damn thing.
A: You trying to trick me?
L: I don’t know I’m just your God now. The abandonment, and aren’t we both cut throat?
A: You won’t believe me, when I was here. I’m the one who can see!
L: Alright, first off, first off.
A: You are insane!
-fb-
L: You always do this! … We’ll be done with Daniel any day now. Now, knock it off. Its about the record, this is my interview. You hear me? The whole interview that will be heard by me.
A: In a future that you won’t see!
-fb-
L: No more! Will you go to speak without asking first. No more! Will you ever flirt around on your years.
A: Oh, come to Dubai, Louis says, but not me.
-Then I can’t make out anything-
Sex and absolution I do agree with as well. Like they did do that. I don't think either were expecting it to go that way from the beginning, though, as in neither started or orchestrated a reason for argument just to have makeup sex. That being somewhat normal for them after a big argument like that would not surprise me however. A certain interpretation I take of them having sex after (given the argument) was more that (it seems to me) part of the accusations here is that Armand is 'flirting' to win over Daniel's favor, and trying to get with him? Maybe even back together with him? (Centered a lot around Armand telling him his little love story with Lestat.) If not, just turning him against him. So having sex could reinforce Armand had/has no intentions of leaving, further obstructions wrt Daniel, and/or infidelity. That it's 'me and you' and not 'you and him'. (Which could be the real lie depending on how you want to take it here lmao. And is so bound to fall through because... Armand doesn't keep his promises, not even to himself it seems since he turned Daniel).
Again all interpretations are just that, so long as it can be legitimately supported by the text, and isn't grossly insensitive. The Talamasca just adds to the whole scene to me more than it detracts from it. The outside world necessarily has influenced both of their inside worlds, and further how they interact with each other in both, and is the cause behind of a lot of their behaviors and reactions. Talamasca causing those to erupt sort of points to that. It's real. The whole narrative actually feels more concrete and like there's a world outside who can still influence them if they were the one's doing it. Sometimes I feel people want to center Louis a bit too much in the story, which is fair, it is his story, he has a narrative that should be centered, but it is also other people's story as well. They are playing roles here in it.
Also this is why I really wonder if they'd ever revisit this? I'm a little peeved about it being so hidden tbh. There seems like so much added context and we're denied most of it from the music and constant flashbacks. Fingers-crossed maybe Daniel was recording it? IDK.
#If this post is long it's because I got too into it#iwtv#interview with the vampire#There's so much going on in this argument I could make another whole post about it#little more in the tags I guess#If both of them are telling their truth Armand still is the one who owes Louis assurance of his reality because he's the one#being accused of nefariously trying to manipulate Louis and his interview. And denying the photos denies the entire reality of things Louis#sees as being manipulative to him and the interview.#basically he has far too much evidence stacked against him to be denying what Louis especially of what he is seeing#As it doesn't ever acknowledge Louis is the wounded party here who also has certain support needs. And not support needs in the way Armand#seems to 'think' he needs thus sewing doubt that he is 'worse off'. Making his symptoms looks worse than they are. Hence gaslighting.#He's doing it the whole time not just the photos so it... doesn't matter who planted them.#Note as well like Louis has A LOT to be triggered by for whenever Armand doesn't follow through on his promises considering how things#in Paris played out. said he wanted him -> gave him up#went to change Madeline -> didn't follow through#loumand#louis de pointe du lac#armand#amc iwtv#iwtv season 2
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tumblr kww fandom was formed seperately from most other social media corners of the fandom. and that leads to silly things like the commonly used name "kww collab" and kenfies vs kenifies. and probably more. cedar if theres any more im forgetting that u know of say them pls
(in response to this confession)
#confessions#series: kww collab#very true! i have not interacted w ANY other part of the fandom myself#but. it fascinates me deeply#i think that like. the kww collab fandom on tumblr is innately based off the original theorisers? maybe???#like. i was the one who came up w calling it kww collab bcs we needed a tag to group all our theories! thats the origin of the name!#ship name kenfies MIGHTT have come from this blog? i have a discord message of me coming up w it on jul 1 bcs there was a confession abtthe#and kenfies is what i went with. thats the best explanation i have (the funniest part is me not even shipping them)#(an alternative was wifen (as proposed by nia))#this fandom was just innately started differently and in isolation#and its really fucking interesting#tumblr users often not using any other social media plays into it too i think ?#but. yeah i cant think of any other examples that would showcase this difference bcs as mentioned i am just not on other places LMAO#ao3 ofen being heavily associated w tumblr as WELL AS saiint havng posted a Lot of kww fanfic is also the reson why kww collab is usedon ao#anyway yep you are right. i am deeply fascinated#yet another long ramble in the tags#(yk i just realised that this sounds like im tooting my own horn and trust me chat im not sorry if it came off that way sadfhslgk.#i just SOMEHOW was vaguely important in this fandom i guess)
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opened up my folder of touhou bookmarks and nearly started hyperventilating how the FUCK did he get in there
#touhou#nagito komaeda#i guess. what the fuck#knowing me I probably did it on accident and then went “I should leave it so I get a scary surprise later”#well! I guess it paid off! thanks past me!#me post
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Melisandre is one of my favorite minor POVs mostly because of how GRRM plays with the all-powerful mage trope. See the deconstruction with her is that despite her antics, she’s actually very powerful and all her visions are legit. It’s just that she absolutely sucks at interpreting said visions, mostly because she has all these preconceived notions and is very stubborn about them. And even when the answer is staring right at her (literally), she just doubles down. And it can be very frustrating as a reader, to be quite honest.
Like she’s been super gung ho about Stannis Baratheon being Azor Ahai/the Prince that Was Promised, though only R’hllor know why, to the extent that she will flat-out ignore any evidence to the contrary. Her visions in ADWD essentially scream that Azor Ahai is someone different (not Stannis!) but good ol’ Mel just won’t budge.
There’s this very hilarious interaction in Jon’s 10th ADWD chapter that essentially spells out all of her problems with visions and prophecy, with Jon serving as the reader’s proxy in some ways.
This interaction happens during Alys Karstark’s wedding feast and Patchface drops some of his weird jingles, which Mel very unsettled by. So she’s turns to Jon and is like, “ugh that dude is so creepy, all my visions tell me so”. And Jon’s reaction to this is super funny, because he’s like:
“You see fools in your fire, but no hint of Stannis?”
Wow Jon lmao
He just had to call her out like that, unprovoked. But his frustration makes sense. He’s constantly been asking about Stannis’ whereabouts but Mel’s responses just aren’t very satisfactory (in his opinion).
Then we get this next line which really just says everything about Mel’s stubbornness and perfectly embodies the deconstruction of the all-powerful seer trope.
“When I search for him all I see is snow.”
So Mel looks for Stannis, whom she believes to be Azor Ahai, in her fires but doesn’t find him. Instead she sees “snow”. And this part tracks with her POV too. We know from her chapter that she constantly sees Jon in her visions. It’s how we get the very interesting “I pray for a glimpse of Azor Ahai, and R’hllor shows me only Snow” line.
So one would think that Mel might go: “Hmmm I look for the prophesied savior, but I don’t see Stannis. Instead, I only see Snow. I don’t doubt R’hllor’s power so if my visions are true, then maybe I need to rethink a few things”.
One would think…
But nope!
And Jon’s like “Hey maybe you’re not seeing Stannis because he’s super dead, ever think about that Mel?” And she proceeds to spout the usual Azor Ahai stuff and even mentions Dragonstone:
“When the red star bleeds and the darkness gathers, Azor Ahai shall be born again amidst smoke and salt to wake dragons out of stone. Dragonstone is the place of smoke and salt.”
To which Jon’s replies, “uhhhh news flash Stannis was not born on Dragonstone so that doesn’t track”.
Obviously this is Jon’s skepticism but I like to think that he took the reader’s place here. Because many of us have asked ourselves, why oh why would Mel think of Stannis just because she saw Dragonstone? Like yeah, he’s the Lord of Dragonstone but he wasn’t born there. It’s quite a valid question and how does Mel counter it? She doubles down and twist herself into a pretzel to make Stannis fit (even though he doesn’t fit at all!)
Really, Jon’s reaction is essentially what would happen if someone dropped me into the world of ASOIAF and gave me the chance to meet Mel and ask her a few questions. I’d be quite frustrated, just as Jon is here. And to be fair, the reader has a lot of auxiliary information (e.g., Jon’s parentage) that Mel doesn’t have.
But then the next few lines really illustrate just why poor Mel can be so frustrating. Because Jon’s follow up is,
“And what of Mance? Is he lost as well? What do your fires show?”
And what does Mel say?
“The same, I fear. Only snow.”
…??!
Mel!😭
Seriously, I cannot! This is the exact same situation as with Stannis. She looks for a king but only sees Snow. This makes me wonder then, based on previous wording, if she’s specifically looking for “the King Beyond the Wall” (not just “Mance”) and only seeing Snow - at this point, Jon has all but supplanted Mance.
So once again, one would think that Mel would go: hmmmm I look for the King Beyond the Wall but I see Jon Snow and not Mance Rayder. Seeing that Mance’s power has been diminished and Jon Snow is now taking control of the wildlings, maybe I should re-evaluate a few things”.
Yeah, one would think…
Homegirl is trying her best, she really is. But sadly, her best can only get E for Effort.
And at this point the reader is just done with Mel, and Jon is too:
“You are seeing cinders dancing in the updraft.”
He doesn’t even bother to phase it as a question lmao. He just calls her out and doesn’t care.
And we’re in his POV so he’s thinking of the lower case “snow”. Also, why in the hell is Mel referring to Jon like this?
Anyway, this is why I think Jon serves as the reader’s proxy in this conversation because it’s like a thinking exercise (facilitated by the narrative) that ultimately goes nowhere because Mel is so, so stubborn.
Because if we really break it down:
R’hllor/the Narrative: Who do you see when you search for the king/Azor Ahai?
Mel: Jon Snow
R’hllor/the Narrative: Ok…and who do you see when you search for the King Beyond the Wall?
Mel: Erm, Jon Snow…
R’hllor/the Narrative/the Reader: Great! So say it with me. The king you’re looking for is J-
Mel: STANNIS BARATHEON!
R’hllor/the Reader: …?!
And before anyone claims that this is a misdirect, Mel really is seeing Jon Snow. Straight from the horse’s mouth:
“I am seeing skulls. And you. I see your face every time I look into the flames.”
Friend….I don’t even know what to say anymore…
#jon snow#melisandre#azor ahai#asoiaf#valyrianscrolls#Red Rahloo going: girl be so fr rn#He literally crafted a giant 70ft billboard with Jon Snow’s mugshot on it#Coupled with a giant red arrow and flashing lights#And said: hey Mel THIS is Azor Ahai! THIS is your king!#And Mel saw it and went: damn so Stannis is Azor Ahai yeah?#Ok let me be fair to Mel because she doesn’t know of Jon’s parentage…yet#But wow it really can be quite frustrating because she’s just so…Mel 😭#But I guess the narrative just wants the reader to know if anything else#I think this exchange and Mel’s POV chapter#Are kind of emblematic of the whole “prophecy will bite your prick off” thing#Because imagine you’re Mel and you’re super convinced that Stannis is Azor Ahai#Because you’re taking aspects of this prophecy so literally#In a way that you really shouldn’t be#But then your visions are saying#well akshually Jon Snow is Azor Ahai#Truly the night is dark and full of errors#canonjonsnow#my stuff
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#mine#ts4#sims 4#the sims 4#simblr#sims#ofmd#ed#ofmd sims#i had an appointment w my psychiatrist 2day and it went rly well and im feelin rly good about it and myself rn 😂#she said she thinks i do have adhd and since i already take adhd meds (off label for treatment resistant depression) she said that it would#be a good idea to talk to my therapist abt this too#and we can adjust some therapy stuff to be more suitable#got a zoloft prescription for during ovulation because i guess that is supposed to help w/ pms#and she's gonna try and get my insurance to cover dyanavel so i can try that too#good things good things!#like. idk i feel like im on the cusp of something good and i NEVER feel this way lol#but this could maybe be part of the puzzle and one step closer to figuring myself out
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me: *making MCD lore -- specifically about the Old Gods of Ru'aun that were forgotten after the rise of Lady Irene -- for fun*
me: *trying to come up with Magick Users Lore*
me: *remembers that Zoey once introduced herself as a fairy before she became an elf*
me:,,,,,humans used to be fairies. Elves and Fairies lived amongst one another (along with the other mythicals) until something happened that resulted in a group of fairies losing their wings but not their magic.
me: these wingless fairies did eventually start losing their magic though, as generations went on and their numbers grew, their magic began to dwindle. they eventually lost their magic identifiers -- pointed ears, sharp teeth, etc -- until they became known as modern day humans.
me: the fairies that didn't lose their wings eventually went into permanent hiding due to being hunted down by humans and wingless fairies (later to be known as magick users).
me: they were being hunted because the wingless fairies/humans believed that they could regain their wings (or their magick) if they ripped the wings off the fairies/consumed them/stole their magick.
me: there are little to no written records of fairies, and the ones that do exist are held in the yggdrasil forest where humans cannot find them. nobody knows where the surviving fairies are because their locations weren't written down, and the elves that did know have long since passed and/or disappeared.
me: by the time MCD happens, fairies are considered a myth and humans/mortals have no idea that they are descended from them. also the reason meif'wa and other species can be magick users is because some of the wingless fairies evolved into different species.
#aphmau minecraft diaries#minecraft diaires#mcd lore#mcd aphmau#mcd rewrite#<- rewrite bc i guess thats technically what it is since i also changed the reason for the war against magick due to not remembering shit#about it. humans being fairies connect to the old gods of ru'aun because the god skī'enr is the mother of magick and was once believed to#have been where humans and elves and other mythicals came from. skī'enr and the rest of their pantheon were all but forgotten bc of the kin#and his quest for godhood as well as the rise of Lady Irene. the surviving records are unreadable due to 900 years of language evolution#i went through all this effort for a single fucking MCD OC dlfh. no regrets i love world building :) all so i could have lore behind their#name. their name being 'skyen' for anyone curious. it IS derived from the name Skī'enr. Well more specifically its derived from the name#Skī'nal which is a legend based OFF of Skī'enr. but thats neither here nor there
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#just saw like half of a tiktok and the urge to make another vent post....#but i wont i dont wanna get into the discourse lol#all im gonna say is - just bc buck 'likes to fix things' doesnt mean he's gonna drop everything to deal with eddies mess#he has his own life and if he wants to have dinner with his bf after a hard day he can#bobby is with his wife and resting why would buck stick around#and Eddie's situation is not bucks to fix - he was there for support and did what he always does#like yeah eddie is about to lose chris and it's awful but what do you expect buck to do about it??? there's literally nothing he can#why are people now mad that he wasnt with Bobby or Eddie and instead went to have dinner with tommy#and it wasnt ooc imo - this is buck finally thinking of himself and his needs first like he should#he won't always be there to fix things for every single person bc he shouldn't be??#(and imo nothing about the convo was weird or ooc either - maybe rushed but they had a minute lol)#well i guess it did turn into a vent in the tags lmao#im gonna delete this im just sooooo annoyed#tiktok how many times do i have to say i wanna stay off 911tok ugh
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