#[ * WHY are they drawn to the incest? i have no clue!!!!! ]

[writethelifeyouwant]

Dive Bar, Ch. 4/?

Pairing: Dean x Sam,  Dean x OFC (Dany) x Sam (previous chapters)

Rating: 18+

Prompt/Summary: @spnkinkbingo square - Gay Panic (eventually, I don’t know how to write short things, so the gay panic comes later). Dany and Dean hit it off at a bar and Dean is confident it’s a sure thing. But Dean doesn’t know that Dany’s has a dare to complete, and he definitely didn’t imagine his night would end with his pull inviting his little brother to come home with them too.

WC: 2262

Warnings: angstttt, mentions of incest, brother/brother incest, mentions of blow jobs

Beta: my enabler - @negans-lucille-tblr​ 😘😘

Chapter 3

                                                            ***

At their next stop off, for a dinner that was slightly more substantial than their gas station lunch, they still weren’t talking. There was nothing to talk about besides what Dean resolutely refused to address, so Sam stuck to his silent treatment. 

Sam wasn’t sure why he wanted Dean to talk about the previous night so badly. If Dean turned around and asked him how he felt about what went down, he wouldn’t have a good answer. It was probably unfair of him to expect Dean, of all people, to be able to process it if not even Sam could. Okay, it was definitely unfair, Sam thought to himself. But in true little brother fashion, there was no way he was about to own up to that. 

Why did he have to make it such a big deal? Like Dean said, so they banged the same chick, so what? 

But that’s not all you did, that voice in Sam’s head pushed in again. You blew your big brother. Looked the man in the eye, the man who practically raised you, then sucked his cock down your throat. What the hell made you think that was a good play?

Dean had enjoyed it though, hadn’t he? It definitely sounded like he had. But how does that make it better, Sam, seriously? 

It does, he argued with himself. It does because if he enjoyed it too then it’s not just me that’s screwed to all hell. 

                                                              *

Dean could tell Sam was up in his head, obsessing over the night before. And the longer Sam stayed quiet, the more Dean worried about what he might be thinking about it. He wasn’t stupid, he knew what they’d done last night wasn’t normal. Wasn’t good. Except it was. It had been so fucking good he’d felt the ghost of Sam’s fingers and lips on his dick every time he had the misfortune to think about it again. And that had been a lot. That’s why you did the right thing shutting Sam up earlier, he reminded himself. Not the time to be popping random boners like a teenager. But the silence was making him self conscious as fuck. 

Once he’d made it through his burger, Dean pulled out his phone and started cold calling hunters, asking around for any leads in the midwest. They got a dime about a string of mysterious deaths about 100 miles south; violent and fairly improbable deaths. Very distracting. Thank god. 

The Impala was a little less tense now that they had a problem to solve. Their voices sounded a little less strained when they ran through the typical gamut of supernatural evil that could be causing all the mayhem they were driving for. 

When they made it into town, it was late enough that most reputable establishments would have been annoyed with them trying to get a room at that hour. Luckily, they didn’t stay in many reputable establishments, and the motel Dean pulled up next to didn’t bat an eyelid when two guys walked in with next to no luggage and wanted to pay in cash. They saw that a lot. 

Right now, Dean wasn’t wild about what they must have thought they were there for, and his insides were screaming out - Not here to fuck, I swear! Just your standard monster hunt. Nothing to see here. Not brothers sleeping with each other, that’s for sure. But as he couldn’t reasonably set the record straight, Dean left it, and strode back to the car to grab his duffle before cracking into their motel room. Sam followed close behind, slinging his own duffle onto his chosen bed. 

                                                            *

Exiting the bathroom after he’d gotten ready for bed, he was met with Dean holding a bottle of bourbon and wearing a conciliatory expression. Still silent, Sam nodded and accepted the glass Dean handed him a moment later. 

Sam settled onto his bed, already in just his t-shirt and boxers, and sipped quietly at his drink. Dean set his glass down on the table between them and took his own turn in the bathroom. He emerged in his typical sleep gear which, Sam all of a sudden remembered, was just his boxers. 

Jeez, put a shirt on. Sam tried to look anywhere other than at his very nearly naked brother, but it picked at him that if last night wasn’t a big deal, this shouldn’t bother him. It had never bothered him before. Although… Sam thought to himself. He had looked before, noticed the muscle definition, the odd freckle that hid behind the hair on Dean’s chest.  

Sam gulped down nearly half the bourbon in one go in an attempt to burn that thought out of his mind as quickly as possible. That is not how little brothers look at their big brothers. That is not how he looks at Dean. It’s just because he likes guys, at the very least he likes having sex with them. That much he’d come to terms with at college. And it’s not like there’s many dating opportunities in hunting, and Dean didn’t know anything about Sam’s broader sexuality so he wasn’t about to hook up with a guy at a bar when Dean was expecting him to take home a pair of boobs; or more typically, sulk off to the impala while Dean and his guest got their motel room for the evening. Dean was just the only guy around most of the time, that’s all. And since Jess, and then hunting, it had been years since he’d had the chance to to really look at another guy like that. So yeah, he looked, because Dean was not a bad thing to look at. 

But right now, Sam’s brain was at war with itself, one side wanting Dean to pull on a shirt and the sweats he’d wear when it got cold, and the other side wanting to peel off the last bit of fabric covering Dean’s skin so he could get a real look. And maybe another taste. And with that, Sam downed the rest of his drink, flicked off the table lamp, and quickly tucked himself under the covers with Dean at his back, who was left to stare blankly at a lump of blankets and messy hair, his full glass of whisky in his hand. 

                                                             *

Even though they’d driven a fair bit south of where they’d been yesterday, the grass still crunched under his boots when Sam trod across it the next morning. He’d already been out for a short run, and arrived back at the motel to find an empty room, with Dean presumably out looking for food. Sam settled himself with his laptop on a picnic table and rebooted the pages he’d had open the previous night at dinner when they started looking into this case. He brought up a new window to look into a thought he’d had on his run earlier. 

“This is a crappy park.” Dean arrived with their coffee and shoved a paper cup towards Sam, which he took gratefully.

Sam chuckled incredulously when he looked up to his brother, attention momentarily drawn away from his laptop screen. “The park is fine, Dean.”

“No swings. You gotta have swings in a park.” Dean shoved half his donut into his mouth.

Sam fixed him with an admonishing stare for a moment before letting out his amusement in a sharp exhale. “Okay, sure.”

“The swings were always your favourite. You don’t remember that?” Sam shook his head puzzledly. “Yeah,” Dean huffed in the way he does. “When you were a rugrat I couldn’t pull you off those things. Said it felt like flying.” 

Sam stared at him for a moment with something behind his eyes that Dean couldn't work out. He ran out of time to try; Sam’s hair fell back in front of his eyes when he looked down to his laptop again. 

“Hey, so, get this. I’ve been looking into the local lore and I think our victims -”

“How do you have wifi right now?” Dean asked through a mouthful of the other half of his donut.

“Phone hotspot. Want to focus for a second, Dean? People are, you know, dying here.”

“Yeah yeah,” Dean grumbled. And he tried to focus on what Sam was saying about the creature that might be hanging out in the woods that he ran by that morning, Dean swore he was trying. But deciding to focus on Sam’s lips as a means to concentrate on the words that were coming out of them proved to be a thoroughly misguided strategy. Because the second he looked at Sam’s lips all he could think about was what they had looked like wrapped around his cock. What they’d felt like dragging across his skin. When Sam’s tongue flicked out to catch a drop of coffee that had beaded on the rim of the cup, Dean’s own tongue went dry, his breath caught in his throat. 

What the fuck is wrong with you, asshole? Dean hoped his distress wasn’t showing on his face. It seemed like he was doing a decent job at convincing Sam he was listening, because Sam was still talking. This was really gonna bite him in the ass later if he had no clue what Sam was saying this whole time. 

Maybe you want Sam to bite you in the ass? Fuck, no, stop it. Dean was used to arguing back and forth with some semblance of a moral compass, though it usually lost, but this time he needed it to win. He had just been sitting there remembering how he used to push a little Sammy on the swings when he was squirt sized. Jumping from that, to wanting him to suck you off does not make you a good brother. Know what it makes you? An asshole. He was supposed to protect Sammy, take care of him, not take care of him. 

“Dean,” Sam’s voice saying his name cut through the noise in his head, and he looked up at his little brother. He hadn’t realised he’d been scrubbing his hands across his face, no wonder Sam was looking at him like a sad puppy right now. “You okay, dude?” There was a hint of annoyance but it was mostly concern.

“Yeah,” Dean blinked and ran his fingers up over his face to scrub through his hair. “Totally awesome.” 

“Okay, well,” Sam didn't seem convinced, but maybe he wasn’t in the mood to push it. “Let’s go get our fed suits on and head over there.”

“Yeah, sounds like a plan.” Dean swung off the picnic bench and crumpled his coffee in one hand, tossing it to the nearest trash can. Sam snickered when it bounced off the rim, and flung his own to the same can from further back, landing it dead centre. Smirking, he set off with his laptop under his arm and Dean pulling faces behind him the whole walk back to the motel. 

“Where we heading again?” 

The glare Sam gave him made it clear he wouldn’t be getting an answer. 

                                                             *

By the time they’d made it to the local bar and restaurant that evening to grab some food and scrutinise the local wildlife for signs of supernatural proclivities, Sam was seriously confused. Dean had been acting off the whole day. And not just in the typical evasive act he pulled when he didn’t want to talk about his feelings, he was spacing out of conversations about perfectly mundane things. Witnesses had started getting annoyed with him after the third time he asked the same question Sam had literally seconds beforehand. When they’d been let into the room of one of the victims, a girl about their age - just out of college, he hadn’t made any jokes about her extensive stuffed animal collection (those bears were freakin’ everywhere man), or the vibrator not so skilfully hidden down the side of her bed. When Sam had switched the music in the car, no warning and no asking for permission, Dean hadn’t batted an eyelid. And Sam had changed it to smooth jazz. 

Now Sam was standing, bewildered, by a barrel serving as a table that he’d been about to sit down at, because when he’d grab Dean’s shoulder to direct him towards the one empty table in the vicinity of the bar, Dean had broken his grip so fast you’d have thought Sam had insulted their mother. Dean came back from the bar with two beers and some menus, dropping all of them unceremoniously onto the barrel-top, and that’s when Sam noticed. 

This was the first time Dean had taken off his fed jacket all day and now he was rolling up his sleeves and loosening his tie, unwinding from the persona and his bracelets were gone. This was the weird thing to end all the weird things that Dean had done all day. Since Sam had given Dean those stupid bracelets nearly a decade ago, he couldn’t remember a single day when Dean wasn’t wearing them. 

It wasn’t like they were valuable or anything. It was wooden craft store beads and elephant-hair cord that Sam had strung together at a summer camp when he was twelve. And he’d been embarrassed to give them to Dean when he got home, wondered why he thought Dean would want some lame homemade souvenir, but Dean had coaxed the presents out of Sam, and insisted that he loved them. And that was that, they’d been on his wrists ever since. But not today. Sam’s lungs deflated. 

Fuck. 

***

Tags: @negans-lucille-tblr​ @hawkerz12​ @babybrotherandthedemon​ @dylansbabygirl24​ @mineshinamary​ @popsensationnicole23​ @spn-problems​ @donthateme454​ @doyouknowsamw​ @peridottea91​@delightfulbakeryaliendeputy @fictionallemons​ @petitgateau911​ @natastic​ @marvelfansworld​ @delightfullykrispypeach​ @akshi8278​ @crashlyrose​ @miufel​ @lyarr24​ @itsthedoctah10​ @kiss-my-peachy-arse​ @leftlokiofpuppy​ @tftumblin​ @devilsbby​ @alice101macwil​ @caitlinvd​ @j-ai-adore-dean​ @disneysloot​ @half-closeted-bi-girl​ @deandreamernp​

[officialjakotsu]

How fandom fucked me up and got me abused

People often say fiction doesn’t effect reality, when defending their “controversial” ships. Firstly. This is complete and utter bullshit as you can find with a quick google search.

Secondly, I want to add in with my own personal experience as to how fiction and fandom was used to lure me into specific mindsets and allowing my abuse.

HEAVY TW FOR ABUSE AND SEXUAL ASSAULT OF A MINOR

When I was 12, I came out as bisexual to a close friend, who we will refer to as L. L, at the time, identified as a girl but has since come out as a trans boy. I will be referring to him with he/him pronouns but I feel it’s important to keep that at the time we believed we were in a same sex relationship. I believe L was 14 at the time (he was one grade above me but a little older for his grade and I have always been one of it not the youngest in my grade due to my birthday.)

L and I had first become acquainted through school and became friends due to shared fandom interests, at the time this being Hetalia. (I could write a whole essay on why Hetalia is bad alone in its effect on people, but that’s not the point. Also I was 12 and didn’t realize it.) After about a year after meeting was when he asked me out and I happily accepted. During our relationship, he also introduced me to Homestuck, which I then became a fan of.

As our relationship continued, we both got very into very roleplay, usually of our favorite ships, most of these being ones L liked that I just liked for him. The important ones to this story being Dirkjake, Dirkhal, Johnjake, and Erisol. With Johnjake, this was a very sneaky way to get me to ship incest. I had not, at the time, realized it was incest. Dirkhal was something I was uncomfortable with, but he pressured me into roleplay with it.

The dynamics between Dirkjake, Dirkhal, and Erisol are... Uncomfortable, to think of now. Dirkjake, as a relationship, canonically failed because it was toxic, and when I read it I was upset they broke up despite how obviously toxic it was. I couldn’t read it as that, because of L. With Dirkhal, it was always roleplay as incredibly passive aggressive between us (the few times I gave in to his begging to roleplay it). Erisol was always roleplayed incredibly aggressive, like how they acted to each other in canon (the characters hate each other.)

These dynamics were romanticized- possessiveness, jealousy, and aggression towards your partner. Then in other fan media I consumed, I found the romanticization of the taking of innocence, of relationships between a caretaker type and the person they were taking care of, of someone incredibly possessive over their partner, of specific types of abuse that made it so much harder for me to realize I was being abused. This was all stuff introduced to me by fandoms, by fanfiction, whether through my own internet usage, or my abuser showing them to me.

I was also drawn into this idea that because it was a “gay” relationship, it was better and more pure than a “hetero” relationship. I was told gay people weren’t abusive. And I believed that.

Fandom taught me these things were okay. Fandom taught my ABUSER these things were okay. So despite how bad it made me feel, how isolated from my family I felt, I thought it was okay. I was the younger one, I told myself this was how relationships were supposed to work because this is how fandom taught me and how my abuser taught me they were. I was inexperienced and I easily swayed because I was a child. Remember, I was a 12 year old when this relationship began. I was 14 when it ended. It was my first relationship. I had no clue how this shit was supposed to work.

Even after the relationship ended I didn’t realize how bad it was. I had found by then it wasn’t good because I saw a post on tumblr warning me about red flags in a relationship and I noticed some of them lined up with L. But even then I didn’t know it was as abusive as it was. It wasn’t until about four years later that it hit me.

Through the romanticization of the dynamics between those relationships, from all the fanfiction, and the fan content, I had gotten abused horrifically. He used this in roleplay, and in our overall relationship, to gaslight me, to abuse and then lovebomb, to excuse himself, and to sexually assault me. He used roleplay to push me into sexual situations I was uncomfortable with (again. I was 12/13/14 during this relationship) and this was an action that was played off as “cute” or “romantic.” He was my “first” in so many things and he loved to coo over my inexperience and lack of knowledge of these things. My childishness was seen as cute. How is this not creepy?

To this day I have trauma. It’s been years but even as I’m typing this out I’m getting itchy and shaky and my chest hurts. I still see L sometimes and every time I do I’m reminded of what he did to me. And he did more outside of fandom too- he tried to ruin my life and tell my friends I cheated on him (I didn’t). I was taken advantage of in so many different ways, because of my introduction to fandom spaces, and the rampant romanticization of abuse in fandoms. I’m not trying to promote “purity culture” or whatever I’m trying to protect vulnerable young kids who are like I used to be, from the situation I was in. My relationship with my mother has never fully recovered. My mental health has never fully recovered. I still have nightmares about him. My relationship with myself is still skewed, and I’m still a fucking doormate because that’s what I was turned into.

Anyway this post is a mess because I can’t fully coherently talk about L, but long story short?

I won’t sit back and let you ship what you want and romanticize what you want. If I can save even one little kid from what I went through, then it’s enough. Fuck you and fuck your ships.

And if any of you pro ship fuckers come on here to complain, you get blocked immediately. I don’t want to hear you defend yourselves on a post where I’ve just told you I was assaulted because of your rhetorics. Fuck you

[birdlord]

Every Book I Read in 2019

This was a heavier reading year for me (heavier culture-consumption year in general) partly because my partner started logging his books read, and then, of course, it’s a competition.

01 Morvern Callar; Alan Warner - One of the starkest books I’ve ever read. What is it about Scotland that breeds writers with such brutal, distant perspectives on life? Must be all the rocks. 

02 21 Things You Might Not Know About the Indian Act; Bob Joseph - I haven’t had much education in Canada’s relationship to the Indigenous nations that came before it, so this opened things up for me quite a bit. The first and most fundamental awakening is to the fact that this is not a story of progress from worse to better (which is what a simplistic, grade school understanding of smallpox blankets>residential schools>reserves would tell you), in fact, the nation to nation relationship of early contact was often superior to what we have today. I wish there was more of a call to action, but apparently a sequel is on its way. 

03 The Plot Against America; Philip Roth - An alternative history that in some ways mirrors our present. I did feel like I was always waiting for something to happen, but I suppose the point is that, even at the end of the world, disasters proceed incrementally. 

04 Sabrina; Nick Drnaso - The blank art style and lack of contrast in the colouring of each page really reinforces the feeling of impersonal vacancy between most of the characters. I wonder how this will read in the future, as it’s very much based in today’s relationship to friends and technology. 

05 Perfumes: The Guide; Luca Turn & Tania Sanchez - One of the things I like to do when I need to turn my brain off online is reading perfume reviews. That’s where I found out about this book, which runs through different scent families and reviews specific well-known perfumes. Every topic has its boffins, and these two are particularly witty and readable. 

06 Adventures in the Screen Trade; William Goldman - Reading this made me realize how little of the cinema of the 1970s I’ve actually seen, beyond the usual heavy hitters. Ultimately I found this pretty thin, a few peices of advice stitched together with anecdotes about a Hollywood that is barely recognizable today. 

07 The Age of Innocence; Edith Wharton - A love triangle in which the fulcrum is a terribly irritating person, someone who thinks himself far more outré than he is. Nonetheless, I was taken in by this story of “rebellion”, such as it was, to be compelling.

08 Boom Town: The Fantastical Saga of Oklahoma City, Its Chaotic Founding, Its Apocalyptic Weather, Its Purloined Basketball Team, and the Dream of Becoming a World-class Metropolis; Sam Anderson - Like a novel that follows various separate characters, this book switches between tales of the founding of Oklahoma City with basketball facts and encounters with various oddball city residents. It’s certainly a fun ride, but you may find, as I did, that some parts of the narrative interest you more than others. Longest subtitle ever?

09 World of Yesterday; Stefan Zweig - A memoir of pre-war Austria and its artistic communities, told by one of its best-known exports. Particularly wrenching with regards to the buildup to WWII, from the perspective of those who had been through this experience before, so recently. 

10 Teach us to Sit Still: A Sceptic’s Search for Health and Healing; Tim Parks - A writer finds himself plagued by pain that conventional doctors aren’t able to cure, so he heads further afield to see if he can use stillness-of-mind to ease the pain, all the while complaining as you would expect a sceptic to do. His digressions into literature were a bit hard to take (I’m sure you’re not Coleridge, my man).

11 The Power of Moments: Why Certain Experiences have Extraordinary Impact; Chip & Dan Heath - I read this for work-related reasons, with the intention of improving my ability to make exhibitions and interpretation. It has a certain sort of self-helpish structure, with anecdotes starting each chapter and a simple lesson drawn from each one. Not a bad read if you work in a public-facing capacity. 

12 Against Everything: Essays; Mark Greif - The founder of N+1 collects a disparate selection of essays, written over a period of several years. You won’t love them all, but hey, you can always skip those ones!

13 See What I Have Done; Sarah Schmidt - A retelling of the Lizzie Borden story, which I’d seen a lot of good reviews for. Sadly this didn’t measure up, for me. There’s a lot of stage setting (rotting food plays an important part) but there’s not a lot of substance there. 

14 Like a Mother: A Feminist Journey Through the Science and Culture of Pregnancy; Angela Garber - This is another one that came to me very highly recommended. Garber seems to think these topics are not as well-covered as they are, but she does a good job researching and retelling tales of pregnancy, birth, postpartum difficulties and breastfeeding. 

15 Rebecca; Daphne du Maurier - This was my favourite book club book of the year. I’d always had an impression of...trashiness I guess? around du Maurier, but this is a classic thriller. Maybe the first time I’ve ever read, rather than watched, a thriller! That’s on me. 

16 O’Keefe: The Life of an American Legend; Jeffrey Hogrefe - I went to New Mexico for the first time this spring, and a colleague lent me this Georgia O’Keefe biography after I returned. I hadn’t known much about her personal life before this, aside from what I learned at her museum in Santa Fe. The author has made the decision that much of O’Keefe’s life was determined by childhood incest, but doesn’t have what you might call….evidence?

17 A Lost Lady; Willa Cather - A turn-of-the-20th century story about an upper-class woman and her young admirer Neil. I’ve never read any other Cather, but this felt very similar to the Wharton I also read this year, which I gather isn’t typical of her. 

18 The Year of Living Danishly: My Twelve Months of Unearthing the Secrets of the World’s Happiest Country; Helen Russell - A British journalist moves to small-town Denmark with her husband, and although the distances are not long, there’s a considerable culture shock. Made me want to eat pastries in a BIG WAY. 

19 How Not to be a Boy; Robert Webb - The title gives a clue to the framing device of this book, which is fundamentally a celebrity memoir, albeit one that largely ignores the celebrity part of his life in favour of an examination of the effects of patriarchy on boys’ development as human beings. 

20 The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read (And Your Children Will be Glad that You Did); Philippa Perry; A psychotherapist’s take on how parents’ own upbringing affects the way they interact with their own kids. 

21 The Library Book; Susan Orlean - This book has stuck with me more than I imagined that it would. It covers both the history of libraries in the USA, and the story of the arson of the LA Public Library’s central branch in 1986. 

22 We Are Never Meeting in Real Life; Samantha Irby - I’ve been reading Irby’s blog for years, and follow her on social media. So I knew the level of raunch and near body-horror to expect in this essay collection. This did fill in a lot of gaps in terms of her life, which added a lot more blackness (hey) to the humour. 

23 State of Wonder; Ann Patchett - A semi-riff on Heart of Darkness involving an OB/GYN who now works for a pharmaceutical company, heading to the jungle to retrieve another researcher who has gone all Colonel Kurtz on them. I found it a bit unsatisfying, but the descriptions were, admittedly, great. 

24 Disappearing Earth; Julia Phillips - A story of an abduction of two girls in very remote Russia, each chapter told by another townsperson. The connections between the narrators of each chapter are sometimes obvious, but not always. Ending a little tidy, but plays against expectations for a book like this. 

25 Ethan Frome; Edith Wharton - I gather this is a typical high school read, but I’d never got to it. In case you’re in the same boat as me, it’s a short, mildly melodramatic romantic tragedy set in the new england winter. It lacks the focus on class that other Whartons have, but certainly keeps the same strong sense that once you’ve made a choice, you’re stuck with it. FOREVER. 

26 Educated; Tara Westover - This memoir of a Mormon fundamentalist-turned-Academic-superstar was huge on everyone’s reading lists a couple of years back, and I finally got to it. It felt similar to me in some ways to the Glass Castle, in terms of the nearly-unbelievable amounts of hell she and her family go through at the hands of her father and his Big Ideas. I found that it lacked real contemplation of the culture shock of moving from the rural mountain west to, say, Cambridge. 

27 Dead Wake: The Last Crossing of Lusitania; Erik Larson - I’m a sucker for a story of a passenger liner, any non-Titanic passenger liner, really. Plus Lusitania’s story has interesting resonances for the US entry into WWI, and we see the perspective of the U-boat captain as well as people on land, and Lusitania’s own passengers and crew. 

28 The Birds and Other Stories; Daphne du Maurier - The title story is the one that stuck in my head most strongly, which isn’t any surprise. I found it much more harrowing than the film, it had a really effective sense of gradually increasing dread and inevitability. 

29 Someone Who Will Love You in All Your Faded Glory; Raphael Bob-Waksberg - Hit or miss in the usual way of short story collections, this book has a real debt to George Saunders. 

30 Sex & Rage; Eve Babitz - a sort of pseudo-autobiography of an indolent life in the LA scene of the 1970s. It was sometimes very difficult to see how the protagonist actually felt about anything, which is a frequent, acute symptom of youth. 

31 Doctor Fischer of Geneva or The Bomb Party; Graham Greene - Gotta love a book with an alternate title built in. This is a broad (the characters? are, without exception, insane?!) satire about a world I know little about. I don’t have a lot of patience or interest in Greene’s religious allegories, but it’s a fine enough story. 

32 Lathe of Heaven; Ursula K LeGuin - Near-future sci-fi that is incredibly prescient about the effects of climate change for a book written over forty years ago. The book has amazing world-building, and the first half has the whirlwind feel of Homer going back in time, killing butterflies and returning to the present to see what changes he has wrought. 

33 The Grammarians; Cathleen Schine - Rarely have I read a book whose jacket description of the plot seems so very distant from what actually happens therein. 

34 The Boy Kings: A Journey Into the Heart of the Social Network; Katharine Losse - Losse was one of Facebook’s very earliest employees, and she charts her experience with the company in this memoir from 2012. Do you even recall what Facebook was like in 2012? They hadn’t even altered the results of elections yet! Zuck was a mere MULTI-MILLIONAIRE, probably. Were we ever so young?

35 Invisible Women; Caroline Ciado Perez - If you want to read a book that will make you angry, so angry that you repeatedly assail whoever is around with facts taken from it, then this, my friend, is the book for you. 

36 The Hidden World of the Fox; Adele Brand - A really charming look at the fox from an ecologist who has studied them around the world. Much of it takes place in the UK, where urban foxes take on a similar ecological niche that raccoons famously do where I live, in Toronto. 

37 S; Doug Dorst & JJ Abrams - This is a real mindfuck of a book, consisting of a faux-old novel, with marginalia added by two students which follows its own narrative. A difficult read not because of the density of prose, but the sheer logistics involved: read the page, then the marginalia? Read the marginalia interspersed with the novel text? Go back chapter by chapter? I’m not sure that either story was worth the trouble, in the end. 

38 American War; Omar El Akkad - This is not exclusively, but partially a climate-based speculative novel, or, grossly, cli-fi for short. Ugh, what a term! But this book is a really tight, and realistic look at the results of a fossil-fuels-based second US Civil War. 

39 Antisocial: Online Extremists, Techno-Utopians, and the Hijacking of the American Conversation; Andrew Marantz - This is the guy you’ll hear on every NPR story talking about his semi-embedding within the Extremely Online alt-right. Most of the figures he profiles come off basically how you’d expect, I found his conclusions about the ways these groups have chosen to use online media tools to achieve their ends the most illuminating part. 

40 Wilding: The Return of Nature to a British Farm; Isabella Tree - This is the story of a long process of transitioning a rural acreage (more of an estate than a farm, this is aristocratic shit) from intensive agriculture to something closer to wild land. There are long passages where Tree (ahem) simply lists species which have come back, which I’m sure is fascinating if you are from the area, but I tended to glaze over a bit. Experts from around the UK and other European nations weigh in on how best to rewild the space, which places the project in a wider context. 

FICTON: 17     NONFICTION: 23

[thecryptidwizard]

Rate the danganronpa characters from favourite to least

Okay so my brain is a total fog and my body has been super weak for the past few days, so I won’t do ALL of the characters from all three games, unfortunately. BUT that doesn’t mean I won’t do this at all, so here are my most favorite to least characters from Danganronpa V3!

Ryoma Hoshi is my all time favorite, of course! I really love his design and overall persona (not to mention his deep voice ohOHOHOH). His backstory is tragic as all hell, and his death makes me physically sick to this day, but his free time events and talent development events makes my heart flutter qwqq but yeah he’s my favorite and I would die for him ya’ know????

Shuichi Saihara! I know I’ve never mentioned him in my posts or drawn him before, and the reason? I have no damn clue. But Shuichi is just a cutie pie with lots of anxiety, just like me (except for the cute part hAH). I can relate to him just as much as i relate to Ryoma, and I think his design is super cool!!

Kaede Akamatsu. She’s such a ray of sunshine I LOVE HEEeRrrr….she’s just so happy and outgoing and aNd aND- uGHHH i kinda wish they didn’t kill her off so damn QUICKLY! I feel like she would’ve had some amazing character development if she had been the character protagonist.

Gonta Gokuhara, the HIMBO- i mean uhh sweet loving entomologist owowowowo!!!!!!!!!! I just love how sweet he is despite having the capacity to chuck a manhole lid like a damn frisby. He’s just!! Baby!!!! 

Kiibo! Wholesome little robot man! He’s just doing his best and I appreciate his existence!!

Angie Yonaga: i love her design and i think her personality was interesting as well.that’s it my brain is melting i got nOting e;lse to s a y-

Himiko Yumeno: she’s sleepy, she’s magical, she’s probably depressed, she’s mE-

Kirumi Tojo: I’ll be honest, i love her character design and personality, but hooOOOO BOY did Ryoma’s death make me hate her for a while. I don’t hate her anymore, but what she did still urks me ya’ know?

Rantaro Amami: a mysTERIOUS boy indeed, which is why i don’t have that much of an attachment to his character, but I kinda like him!! I love that he wears nail polish and has a cool personality!!

Korekiyo Shinguji: i think he’s pretty cool, despite the incest lore. I also like how he’s the same voice actor for Teruteru Hanamura aHAAAAAAAAA

Miu Iruma: she’s an odd one, that one.

Kaito Momota: i’m honestly not sure if i don’t like him that much because of how ignorant he is in the game, or how much he’s favored over most underrated characters. But that’s okay!! I won’t hold any judgement to those who like him! I like his enthusiasm for life and space, and think his death was most honorable.

Kokichi Ouma: same thing with Kaito’s character. I like him, but i feel like he’s a bit overrated sometimes! He’s a funky little rat man who loves to be the clown he truly is.

Maki Haruwaka: ah, i don’t have much to say about Maki, unfortunately. I guess i never got attached to her that much??

Tenko Chabashira: her persona is loud and outgoing, but her hatred in any man that breathes, and her obsession with Himiko kinda urks me a little. Other than that, she’s a sweetheart! big lesbian energy!!!!

Tsumugi Shirogane: i only find her to be my least favorite is because of her motives and role in the game, i think. Other than that, i never grew attached to her character. I like her design though!

Hope you enjoyed my half-brained rambles, anon!

[floppyamon]

Do you always get nasty asks like that??

Nah I usually get sweet asks, but for some reason somebody(s) have been sending me the usual “she/th is nasty” asks even though every “issue” with it is fan made: 

Pedophilia: Shiro and Keith were the only adults on the team at 18 and 25 and now because of [spoiler] events their ages are 20-21 and 25 so like ??? 

Incest: There have been no hints in canon that they’re related, and I’m pretty sure since Keith just wrapped up his biological family arc the possibility of Shiro being “surprise-related” as a plot twist would’ve been addressed, but it wasn’t because they’re obviously not related and it’s a boring as shit trope anyways

And one of the director/editors interviewed laughed at the thought of them being related

Also this fandom has a weird obsession with who’s related to who instead of recognizing the show is hyper aware of the shit tropes usually present in sci-fi fantasy and tries to avoid them 

Ex: Having the male fantasy characters do things that female characters normally have to go through such as being the damsel in distress and having the big bad villain want them as a slave 

Adopted siblings: Like Shiro, a 19-20 year old, would adopt a teenager when he’s in the military training to leave the Earth when it’s blatantly obvious that Shiro looking out for Keith was him scouting him out at a school and vouching for him so he has a better chance at life/a way out of the foster system

And like I could go on here but all the above points are also invalidated when you remember that the directors and staff have drawn and liked mushy she/th art so 

Sigh

Most anti arguments stem from their insecurities about how kl was never intended or wanted by the directors and it sucks that the rest of us have to deal with it, much like how Lance from s1 continued to be a bitch to Keith even though Keith had no clue why he was being harassed by a stranger (aka klantis are s1 Lance and it makes me embarrassed for them because it’s been two years and they haven’t grown up haha)

[kwamiwayzz]

citttrrruuuussssss

I don’t see enough of the meta when it comes to citrus so I decided to ask myself these questions after copying and pasting them from another blog cause why not >.> 

And I may be low key still trying to ignore my responsibilities

–

Main ship <3 Yuzu x Mei (i dont even think they have an actual ship name) 

I’m gonna cut it at a certain point cause I realized how much I was rambling 

• When or if I started shipping it:

Ah...surprisingly I didn’t start shipping these two until a few months ago. I’ve been following the manga since the day it came out and I’ve always liked them but I never actively “shipped” them or anything. Even though I went all “YeSSSSS” when they started dating in chapter 16, I was still just more of a casual fan.

There are a few reasons I can think of to why I was drawn into shipping them (finally...) was that I somewhat got back into yuri over the summer after watching a clip from Fate Kaleid.......*cough* anyway...and started going back on dynasty-scans to see what kinds of new yuris have been made huehuehue. Long story short I shortly got back into MadoHomu and Yuzu x Mei, and saw the latter ship as the “less angsty” version and went on from there 

The other reason I got super into them was that the latest few chapters, and remembering chapter 24, was that I really started to notice how Mei became less cold and closed-off from Yuzu. And seeing her blush and be all nervous around her was just..... <3 <3 <3~~~~~~

Oh and this one comic by smxmuffinpeddling made me laugh (and still makes me laugh) so it spiraled from there. They are a blessing to Citrus. 

• My thoughts:

I tend to gravitate towards ships that have that dark/light dynamic. I’m cliche and I have a weakness for ships that have the aloof dark haired girl who’s usually looked up to or very popular fall in love with the ditzy, but kind and optimistic light haired girl and vice versa (see: Chikane/Himeko, MadoHomu, Diakko {to an extent}) Not exactly opposites attract, but I found their interactions funny when they initially hated each other and whenever I read the manga in retrospect in my head I’m all, “honey you two have no idea” 

i like ships where i can see a little of myself in both characters 

• What makes me happy about them:

I understand that the pseudo-incest thing can turn some people off from the pairing but in this story I feel like it’s justified enough that pretty much the whole fandom is cool with it. Yuzu and Mei didn’t grow up together nor are they blood related, but taking the “they’re not related by blood” justification out of the way while the kiss that Mei stole from Yuzu is what led to Yuzu developing feelings for her step-sister, Yuzu already started showing some sort of attraction in chapter 1 when Mei hugged her to just to get her cellphone. So, kiss or no kiss, Yuzu probably would’ve developed a crush on Mei regardless. As for Mei, the step-sister thing forced the seemingly-opposite girls to interact and it’s what led to Yuzu finding out all these things about Mei and help her with her issues. So, I think the fact that Yuzu would go great lengths for her is what would lead her to falling for her.

I really like how Yuzu doesn’t give up on Mei despite Mei always having to push her step-sister away. As much as I love Yuzu and do relate with her on a spiritual level, I do relate with Mei a lot (despite some friends saying I’m more like Yuzu lol). Anyone else who would try to get close with Mei would either get tired of her for being so closed-off and eventually just give up on her. I like the fact that Yuzu does see a lot of the good in Mei that she can’t see in herself. The whole dynamic of the closed-off, pessimistic, sometimes brooding person with the open, optimistic, never-gives-up person is a common dynamic I’ve seen everywhere and I happen to be one of those people that really do like it (at least if done right to an extent or I relate on a certain level) and also reminds me of sasuke and naruto despite never shipping that *cough* but anyway...

Plus, I remember smxmuffinpeddling mentioning this in the tags of one of their fics, but I really do like how both of them put in a lot of work to make their relationship work. Yeah, sure it seemed like Yuzu was doing all the work in the beginning, but as soon as Mei began to open up and trust Yuzu more, she does try to put in genuine effort in maintaining their relationship (using Yuzu’s notebook as a perfect date template, when she talked with Yuzu in chapter 24 that their relationship has nothing to do with other people’s opinions, asked Harumi for advice on how to start a conversation with Yuzu in the vol. 7 extra, being open to Yuzu’s offer of the one kiss a day thing, and i wish to see many more things~)

• What makes me sad about them:

Need I explain...

*Sigh* as much I love these two, I just want them to interact more with words. Like have more casual conversations. It could be the mundane things or about any problems or issues they could be having. I live for healthy communication, and I feel like Yuzu and Mei are still working up to that.

• Things done in art/fic that annoys me:

So...finding actual fan content of these two, let alone for Citrus in general is like treading through the Sahara fucking Desert 

I haven’t really found anything concrete in art/fic that annoy me...yet but the most I’ll say is making both of them unreasonably OOC. This fandom is pretty small despite citrus apparently being a super popular yuri manga (I really didn’t know that until recently) so OOCness isn’t too much of a problem. I used to be heavily into the Frozen fandom so of course when you have a larger fandom you’re going to have a crap ton of fan interpretations and lots of AUs that either don’t fit or drive the characters being written about to be OOC.

• Things I look for in art/fic:

Lots of fluff cause we don’t get enough of it in the manga TT_TT 

If it’s just them talking or having a date or something mundane that allows them to get to know each other more then sign me the fuck up. I like seeing fics that go into Mei’s perspective and I’m also a huge fan of content that really showcases the support they have for one another because feels~

In fact here’s some fics I’ve read that show some of this stuff I’ve mentioned: 

citrus schtuffs by angel0wonder (literally anything written by smx/angel0wonder bless them)

 Citrus - A Compilation by mikotyzini

The Adventures of Mei and Yuzu by mikotyzini 

Citrus: Fantasies by epitomeodisaster (i literally don’t remember if i read this one but so far it has what i mentioned earlier)

Sweet and Sour by Cynical-Banshee (words cannot describe how much I love the writing style and characterization of Mei and Yuzu in this fic, it has almost everything I’m looking for that the manga doesn’t have enough of...and chapter 5...*dies*) 

that’s all i can think of for now, but despite low numbers of content most of the stuff ive come across so far is pretty good 

• Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: 

For Yuzu, I wanna say Harumin only because they’re best friends and she’s always got Yuzu’s back and stuff and I know some people in the fandom already highkey ship them...however (yeah I’m gonna be one of those people ^^;), in the story I feel like it would be a bit cheap having Harumi secretly have feelings/fall for her best friend because while I was used to the yuri cliches when I first read the manga, I personally feel like the story is already far in Yuzu and Mei’s relationship that adding more unnecessary third party drama would kinda be tiresome to me. That’s not saying I’m not open to it. If Saburouta does something new or different with the whole “best friend is in love with main protagonist” cliche that I’ve seen in other yuri like Strawberry Panic, then I wouldn’t mind reading it. 

For Mei...this is gonna sound like a weird answer, but I’d probably go with Matsuri. Part of the reason just being that they do kinda share some similarities together (being alone most of their life, sometimes clinging to the one person they feel like they can trust a.k.a Yuzu), but I’m also bad at explaining shit so I’ll probably just leave it at that :P 

• My happily ever after for them:

THEY HAVE A KID (i think i came up with a concept for them having a son in my head but i never drew it...yet) 

and they live in a cozy apartment together. Mei being self-conscious about her parenting skills and Yuzu always reassuring her that she’ll be fine and she’ll support her in everything she’s having trouble with if Mei has no fucking clue how to show love and affection to a child, let alone her own. The girl already took awhile trying open up and show her love to Yuzu, so this would be a challenge lol 

Yuzu trying to reassure their kid that while his mother is pretty stubborn and has a hard time expressing her feelings, she loves them both very much <3~

• What is their favorite non-sexual activity?: 

TALKING/COMMUNICATION (wait that’s my favourite lol) 

I’m assuming that once they’re deep in their relationship, just sitting down and talking about the mundane things whether it’s about their day or ranting about whatever, would be something they would find relaxing. In the end, they’re still learning more about each other (and I fucking love that) 

oh and trying new things with each other. Yuzu would be the one dragging Mei to try out something they’ve never done before (I can’t think of any right now), Mei would probably be super competitive when it comes to getting the skill down in whatever they’re doing but of course Yuzu would tell her she doesn’t need to get so worked up and should just let loose and have fun

[agirlwritesreviews]

The Shining (1980)

Directed by: Stanley Kubrick | Starring: Jack Nicholson and Shelley Duvall

This is the first film of Kubrick’s I have seen and by the end of it all, I understand why The Shining is considered a classic. 

I’m not crazy for horror films but I certainly do appreciate good ones that don’t just give you cheap thrills - and, Kubrick’s masterpiece is definitely not cheap at all. 

The film starts with Jack Torrance (played by Jack Nicholson) being hired as the new caretaker of the Overlook Hotel. The previous caretaker apparently was taken with cabin fever and then murdered his wife and two daughters, but this doesn’t seem to unnerve Jack at all and he brings his wife, Wendy (played by Shelley Duvall) and son, Danny (played by Danny Lloyd) to stay by themselves in the hotel for the whole winter as part of his job. 

Now, The Shining is art as art can get. 

It’s the type of movie that you’d have to pay really close attention to as to not miss any details and when I mean details - I really mean details. I was left researching and reading other viewer theories about the movie and all these analyses just reveal how great the aesthetic and the storytelling of this film was. P.S. I know Stephen King (the author of the book the movie is adapted from) is not such a big fan of Kubrick’s interpretation but personally, I liked it. 

Going back, Wendy and Danny get toured around their home for the winter by the hotel chef, Dick Halloran (played by Scatman Crothers). On their tour, Dick manages to communicate telepathically to Danny and the audience finds out that the two share a gift called, the “shining”. The shining allows them to see visions, see past events, and basically it’s this psychic ability that allows them to connect to each other in a deeper or more advanced level. The way this skill was shown was a bit disappointing for me and seemed out of the place with the aesthetic of the movie because it just showed a quick glance from Halloran and a voice-over asking Danny if he wanted ice cream. I do not know exactly how Kubrick should have portrayed it but I have reservations with that scene. 

Nothing notable happens after that, except for the family being told to stay away from Room 237 in the hotel. Danny asks Halloran, what’s in there and he just says nothing. Mysterious. Anyway, viewers then get to see how the hotel looks from Danny’s point of view with him riding his toy car around the hotel. The camera angle from the bottom, just adds to that sense of unease and coldness about the hotel matched with totally unnerving music. Then, Danny sees the two daughters of the old caretaker staring at him. Sure, he already saw the identical sisters before dressed in creepy matching outfits but in the second scene with the three of them, the twin ghosts invite him to play with them - forever. ABSOLUTELY CREEPY. And, that scene was shot in this yellow-lit hall that would trigger your claustrophobic-ness. Danny copes by talking to his imaginary friend, Tony, and being reassured that it was just a vision. 

Things take a turn when everyone in the hotel leaves and the family gets stuck together amidst a snow storm. Viewers get to see Jack’s slow descent into madness as he gets increasingly frustrated about his writing lashing out at his wife. That was the instance I realized that this man had a history of being violent and was also maybe violent towards Danny - which is why their father-son scene where Danny sat on Jack’s lap felt so weird and disturbing. In that scene, Danny asks reassurance from his father about him not hurting them, and Jack follows through. But, Wendy screams at Jack in the following scenes accusing him of hurting his son again, after Danny walks towards them with marks of being strangled on his neck. “Again” is because of a prior incident where Jack hurt his son 5 months ago though he claims it to be a year or so back, if I remember correctly. 

The camera pans over to Jack with a face that showed no recollection of him ever laying his hand on Danny so I assumed it was the ghosts. Remember, the ghosts in the hotel, the creepy twins, Danny’s visions, and all. So, Jack investigates and heads on over to Room 237 where he kisses this woman who rots into a dead one before his very eyes. What was striking about that scene was how the camera shifted back and forth from the being Jack was holding in his arms to a dead woman in the bathtub. Really unnerving and made me appreciate the effect of good fast cuts. He assures his wife that there was no ghost - even though this hotel is clearly haunted - and walks out in rage when Wendy says she wants them to leave the place. Moving forward, Jack meets other ghosts like Lloyd the bartender and Grady, a waiter - who just so happened to have the same name as the caretaker who went insane.

At this point, you know that Jack is kind of unhinged, that there really are malevolent spirits in the hotel, that Wendy is helpless, and that Danny is in danger. 

So with Jack’s marital troubles, this Grady tells him to “fix” his issues with his wife sharing his story of how he “fixed” it with his. I mean, if that wasn’t a clear clue about the real identity of this I’m-not-the-caretaker-only-the-waiter-Grady then I don’t know what is. This guy also says something peculiar along the lines of, “you have always been the caretaker” to Jack. Jack then goes on a blind rage hunting his family down. But, Wendy manages to defend herself and locks Jack in the pantry or fridge only for him to be released by Grady - though, we do not see Grady actually opening the door for his freedom. While that was happening with Jack, Danny is getting visions and writing REDRUM in the door which Wendy reads as MURDER when reflected by the mirror. 

In one scene, Wendy’s acting was so realistic that a Google search revealed to me how the actress playing her, Shelley Duvall, was in such a bad state filming that scene 127 times that those were real tears and she said her hair was falling out. No words from me. 

Moving on, Jack tears the door down to get to Wendy with his ax but she slashes his hand so he just marches over to the lobby to kill Halloran who was summoned by Danny to come through their telepathic connection. Wendy gets out and she looks for her son who was running around in the Overlook maze in the snow from his father. And, the film gets more interesting. 

Wendy going around the hotel runs into this man in a bear costume performing a sexual act on a man. So were those ghosts or just visions? This was the type of scene you’d just be confused at and forget about amidst the ensuing drama - which will all make a bit of sense in the end. She runs away and sees the visions her son has been seeing like the hotel lobby being filled with blood which was really beautiful and an aesthetically pleasing expression of a scene in my eyes. Meanwhile, Danny being a smart and advanced child manages to trick his father by retracing his steps in the snow so he manages to reunite with his mother and escape using Halloran’s snow car he used to get to the hotel in the storm. Jack freezes to death and then a photo of him is shown in a ball in the hotel dated 1921. Cue end credits. 

After the end of the movie, questions come swirling back. Why was Jack in that photo dated 1921? What was the purpose of that man in a bear outfit? What was the significance of REDRUM? What happens afterwards? So were the ghosts real? 

And that’s the reason why I had to research and read up on the different theories. Because this movie is just so good that it makes you think, and it doesn’t show horror as something gruesome but something that can actually be treated artfully. 

One theory that seemed to fit was how the bear man was actually a symbolism for Jack sexually abusing Danny. In the beginning of the film, there’s a still of Danny being in the same position as the bear man Wendy sees. Danny also lies on a bear pillow in the beginning and clever watchers have noted how Jack reads a magazine with an incest story at the start of the film. For me, Wendy having that vision is the hotel playing on each character’s weaknesses and denials in life. I believe that Wendy actually knew the abuse going on with Danny but she was constantly trying to bury that thought from her mind. Tony, as Danny’s imaginary friend might have been his coping mechanism because of the domestic abuse he was experiencing at home. Grady saying how Jack has always been the caretaker seems relevant after the whole film where the ending shows Jack being in 1921. My personal theory is that Jack and Grady worked together in 1921 and their spirits were both attracted back to the Overlook Hotel where Grady came first, then Jack again as the new caretaker. I don’t think it’s destiny that Jack met an awful fate but there clearly is something about their souls being drawn to that place. I believe that the characters all have baggage and personal trouble that the Hotel manages to get out of them in a violent and undesirable way. With all these sly and subtle details uncovered by audiences, the question pops up: which is real and which is not? Which among the visions or apparitions or other ghosts were actually happening in reality, and which were just happening in their heads? 

Knowing that Danny is suffering from the abuse, how do you trust that the things he sees are true? Knowing that Wendy is in denial of aspects in her life, how do you know her view is what is real? How do you know that Jack’s visions are real? 

Verdict: WORTH IT | Grade: 4/4 

[blyedeeks]

May I ask why you ship Jonerys? I don't know, I guess I /can/ see the allure, but the fact that they're aunt-nephew as well as how much their personalities clash really kind of turn me off :(

This wasn't meant to be hate or judgy btw! I'm just genuinely curious as to what you like about Jonerys!!

Haha, don’t worry, anon, you can be judgy all you want on this matter tbh. What i don’t like is people coming to other’s inboxes and harassing them tbh. But I don’t expect anyone to think I’m “right” in shipping incest really. Because I know it’s wrong and i said it over and over and i’ll say it again if I have to xD

Wow, why I ship Jonerys... this will actually be a very long answer? I hope you forgive me, it’s just that... it isn’t simple at all. Because the reason I ship jonerys is basically related to the reason i ship anything ever + my “ship sense”.

So let’s go by items, cause I know i’ll talk a lot.

Let me start with this: When I first started shipping them (back in 1x01), I didn’t know they could be related.

This is not a “reason” why I ship them, but the reason why I saw this possibility and i just leapt into the ship wagon without any fears (LOL)

And yes I’m aware many people already knew about the R + L = J theory back then (in 2010 if i’m not mistaken) but I was a casual fan, and I didn’t. And, tbh, many many didn’t. So if you go back and watch the show right from the beginning, you’d never suspect those two characters could be related.

I only found out about 3 years ago (I THINK) when i restarted my GOT watch ( i stopped watching GOT i 2010 - i think- i still don’t remember why. Doesn’t mean i stopped watching Jon/Dany, cause I always loved the idea of then - i’ll explain later.

 and I began watching again right after season 5. I don’t remember HOW but I think a friend of mine explained the R + L = J theory to me then)

Now to the reasons: 

Their story always had potential

So okay, Game of Thrones is probably one of the only things I watch where THE PLOT is one of the things that drawn me the most. And, in general, i ship a lot of things because i like the potential of the story of said couple happening : 

I have always been drawn to the idea of jon and dany becasue their characters are....so different and so similar at the same freaking time??? 

They were both... orphans, pushed around by the obligations implied in their families- without truly deserving any of the “rewards” their families could offer (jon was a bastard, dany was just being used as a wife for her brother’s plans), both characters started the show being...innocent and gentle? (yeah? noticed that?) and for that... they also suffered, just the fact that everyone expected so little of them, treated them so bad was enough for me to want them to be heroes and rise above everyone and be together and rule the whole thing (season 7 hello, ily)

Also, I LOVED how ever since the beginning, there was this ice versus fire symbology about them. Jon being, Jon Snow, a Stark (winter is coming and all), living on the north, going to the wall etc; Dany being a Targaryen, mother of dragons, from the south, literally surviving fire.

Ice and Fire indeed. (now canon, oh season 7)

Now, even though i knew so little of the books, i DID know that they were called a song of ice and fire. And i caught that idea in my mind right away. When I first started watching the show... i was like, okay he’s ice and she’s fire and there’s gonna be a ginormous journey ahead of them but they’ll meet in the end and they’ll be the key to all of these lands problems (again, season 7, hello and I love you)

I knew (or "felt”) THEY were the key, or one of the keys, again because their characters were the ones who were pushed around, belittled by others, but they still remained being honorable (let’s not enter discussions about whether they TRULY were of the writers just think they were and portrayed them like that but people disagree cause that’s another conversation entirely). So, i just... why wouldn’t i ship them? Let’s get these two opposing but similar forces together, those two characters who suffered so much and were humbled and then rose --and they’ll rule this thing together

And, for real, when you watch the show you can see all of their symbologies in their journeys (i can’t even describe everything but i can try to find a vid to help), even the way they’d cut the scene would somehow show Dane struggling with something, then cut to Jon (or vice versa). The fact is, for me, Jon and Daenerys meeting and ruling is one of the most plot satisfying things that could happen on this show.

Not to mention that : 1- for people familiar with the book, we all know there’s a whole prophecy of Azor Ahai, the prince that was promised and all.... (hey season 7). We also know that Jon and Dany have traits that would make them both fit description to some extent. Again.... badass.

I’m not even sure if i need them to be involved or if i just want them to rule everyone together or what. I can barely explain it. All i know is that I find their journeys interesting and so intertwined, i love the idea that everyone in westeros was fighting and killing each other while those two big forces were rising and being awesome while everyone was doubting them. And i like the idea of them joining their forces. 

PS; i disagree that their personalities clash that much actually? I think they aren’t that similar and they aren’t that different, if it makes any sense.

In ways, Dany wants to be a queen no matter what and Jon doesn’t care about that, however they BOTH care about the people they are ruling - unless most of the other leaders on the show. THAT and the parallels I explained above... and more

And Finally: My Ship Sixth Sense!

Yes. Yes I’m aware this is crazy. But here’s the thing, and I was just talking about it with friends of mine yesterday, I’m an INFP anf there are a lot of shows/books/movies where i’ll just look at a ship one moment and a light bulb will turn on in my heart and i’ll go OKAY IDK HOW BUT THIS WILL HAPPEN

Jon/Dany are .... the best example of this happening to me. Even before i even watched the show I had this feeling, when I saw their respective first scenes, that feeling was SCREAMING at me. I’m not psychic (LOL),  thing is... i kinda tend to pick up cinematography, music, editing hints without realizing it (not just me BTW, infps are wonderful at “”predicting”” ships). So THAT + the things I explained up there probably resulted in this “intuition/feeling” i had about Jon/Daenerys since the beginning.

And that feeling was SO STRONG right from their first scene that.... to be honest... i wanted it to be true? As some sort of pride/fun thing, maybe a bet i made with myself (LOL), i wanted to see myself and my crazy ship sixth sense being right. 

So even after I found out they might be related (cause it was only kinda confirmed last year), the feeling never stopped - all the clues I saw, the story unraveling, nothing changed....and there was a moment i was just,,,, the heck with it, i know it’s wrong but i also know it’s a tv show, not any tv show - game of thrones where the morals are messed up anyway- so i just wanna see this happen cause the story is demanding it and my ship sense is demanding it and it would be interesting as heck to watch.

EPILOGUE (LOOOOL) : Now, a few vids, because this show has so much info is hard to list and i DOUBT i made much sense on the story part:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAP1yC6LYh8 (specially towards the end you can see the parallels and contrasts all at the same time)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQIAML3cZd8  --: i don’t think the song they picked match the show but this vid shows so so many parallels

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1cxZO142E8 (the most recent one)

[everlarkbirthdaygifts]

Happy Birthday jenny03suki!

We wish @jenny03suki a very belated Happy Birthday! In order to help you celebrate your day @mega-aulover has written a Everlark story just for you! We hope you like it :)

Prompt: Werewolf/Incest. Peeta and Katniss are half or full blood siblings. They have been having a secret relationship when their secret of being mates comes to light when Katniss’s heat cycle happens and blows up when the pack see Katniss’s body changes as their forbidden pup grows inside her.

Rated:  M (Trigger Warnings:  Minor violence & Suggested incest)

A/N: A major thanks to @norbertsmom for helping me with this prompt. She gave me the idea for the story and for betaing it at the last hour.

Forbidden Love

The alarming sounds of howling disturbed Katniss as she returned back to her den with food. Everything looked off. The ground looked disturbed. Concerned, Katniss called out, “Peeta.”

She wanted to keep positive. Peeta didn’t know this part of the woods, and she hoped he was around the corner. But nothing at their small home seemed right. She began to panic; something was wrong. She reached out with her mind. ‘Peeta where are you?’

‘Katniss,’ Peeta’s voice sounded, reverberated in her soul. ‘They’ve found us. Run! Hide!’

“Peeta, where are you?” Katniss frowned looking for clues as to their direction.

“I’m leading them away from you.” Peeta warned, “Don’t follow me, Katniss.”

“No!” Katniss said in her mind and out loud in frustration. Peeta always put her first like this foolish plan of his to take on the other clansmen on his own.

“Katniss, I need you to run and save yourself!” Peeta ordered.

The howls grew angrier and they didn’t sound that far away.  They were nearing him, she dropped the game she caught. “I’m coming,” Katniss replied to him.

“No, stay away…our pup,” Peeta voice sounded desperate and she could have sworn scared.

Katniss ignored his voice and pushed passed her fear clouded-mind. Using the heightened sense of smell that came with being pregnant, and her tracking abilities, she ran through the forest. She glanced around at the broken twigs and disturbed underbrush indicated there were three of her clan chasing Peeta. She could smell the strong wolf musk mixed with pine, damp earth, berries, and wild flowers. It revealed it was her cousin Gale and his hunting pack that were chasing after Peeta.

Her heart rate increased, her eyesight sharpened, as she picked out a piece of the shirt Peeta was wearing. Her nostrils flared as she inhaled the air, trying to determine the direction in which they had gone.

She could smell Peeta’s scent of bread, dill and cinnamon. Her mate was a baker. He was drawn to the kitchens as a child, preferred to be around Ripper than with the other members of the Clan. Compared to other clans their pack was small. Her father arranged for Katniss to marry into another group.

It was a necessary step to help protect them against their enemy Snow. Katniss understood it was her duty to go through the pre-arranged marriage to an undisclosed clan member that was set up  by her uncle Haymitch before she was born. Both families were supposed to meet today for the first time. Haymitch had left before Peeta could present himself before her father yesterday; her uncle had no idea of the chaos that was going on internally within the clan. It was a scandal, not only because she broke her words but because of Peeta.

Katniss was afraid her family was desperate enough to teach Peeta a lesson. It was why she hid so deep in the forest. Why she made sure to cover their tracks. Her inner wolf wanted to leap out but Katniss did not let her, she wanted to touch Peeta, make sure he was fine.

She heard the growling before she saw them at the base of a cliff the three wolves morphed into their human form surrounding Peeta. It was Gale who struck first.

“NOOOO,” Katniss screamed.

Thom, Rory, and Bristel egged Gale on as he struck Peeta repeatedly. Katniss knew Peeta wouldn’t defend himself. When she got close enough, her inner wolf leapt out to protect him. Katniss jumped in front of Peeta, baring her canine teeth, snarling and snapping at the men of her clan. Her mate’s body lay limp behind her.

Her cousin Gale and his friends surrounded them.

“Catnip, get out of the way,” Gale growled. “You’ve always been too damned innocent for your own good, protecting the un-favored one.”

Katniss growled, she was fueled by the need to protect her family. Her wolf form coiled ready to attack if Gale came closer.

Gale’s eyes looked menacing, his voice dipped low, “Catnip, you’re his sister. You shouldn’t have married him. Your union is accursed, and your pup is unnatural.”

Katniss narrowed her large silver-like lupine eyes at Gale. He didn’t understand, None of them did. Peeta never forced himself on her. To the outside it was a horrible deed.

 It was all so complicated.

She was bonded to Peeta in a way no could understand. Not even her parents comprehended the drive to be with Peeta. From a very young age Katniss had been aware of Peeta, she’d fought the attraction to him because they were siblings, but as she matured her inner wolf screamed that this was her mate. It drove her to finally take the oath of marriage with him, and it wasn’t until she was with him, that she’d found peace and happiness. Nothing matter in the end, and even the preoccupation of breaking the pact with the other clan melted away once she was tied with Peeta.

They kept it a secret from the members of their clan until Katniss found herself pregnant with a pup. She’d wanted to run away with Peeta, but he wanted to do the honorable thing and go before their father and tell him the truth.

Their father had exploded into a fit of rage.

Adam Everdeen wasn’t one prone to violence. By nature he was an even tempered man, but Katniss was his favorite child. Peeta was his least favorite, and was known amongst the clan as the ‘unfavored child’.  When it came to his children Adam loved Katniss and Prim but it was known he couldn’t stand his only son and it was a mystery as to why.

Peeta looked like Prim, fair skinned, with blond hair, but their blue eyes were different. While Prim's’ eyes were paler like that of their mother, Peeta’s were a brilliant blue that looked violet.

At the clan’s discovery that they’d married, Katniss convinced Peeta to run away, going into the deep forest. This morning Katniss had left Peeta sleeping in the small den they’d found for themselves; she had to go hunting for food. Had she’d stayed, Gale and the others wouldn’t have done this to him.

Katniss was scared and angry and was ready to die, if need be.

Gale morphed into his wolf form, a formidable gray and black wolf, which  was menacing, though his white paws made him look dainty. Peeta’s color was unlike anyone else’s in the clan.  He had a pure white coat. Not even Prim’s was completely white; hers was mixed with gray and had black markings on her tail that looked like a duck. Katniss focused her energy on defeating her hunting partner.

There were only two large wolves in their pack, one was her father and the other was Peeta. Though what Gale lacked in size he made up for it with speed. She kept an eye out for the others who remained in their human form.

 Gale was a practiced hunter; he knew how to trap his pray.  However, Katniss knew his weakness. He walked around her growling. Her eyes glowed, showing him she wasn’t afraid. Gale lunged at her and she snapped back and bit his nose.

Gale jumped back and his eyes took that predatory glint when he was angry at his prey. He whipped around and jumped mid air to attack Katniss, when another wolf hit him on the side and pinned him.

“That’s enough!” The mighty boom of Adam's’ voice resounded in the woods.

Gale half whined, half growled, instantly turning back to his human form. Bristel immediately joined him.

Their father was surrounded by some of the other elders from their pack.  Adam harshly said, “Gale I told you to find them, not hurt them.”

Katniss, seeing that the attack had relented, morphed back to her human form. Her concern was for her mate. “Peeta,” she whispered, tears were running down her face.

He sat up, his face was bruised and she felt the pain radiating from his middle, as if he had bruised ribs. Because they were bonded as mates, Katniss could feel every ache acutely.  

His pain, and her hormonal state, overwhelmed her emotions and she cried bitterly.  His arms went around her and once more the feeling of being home overwhelmed Katniss.  “Hush,” Peeta comforted, quietly pulling the sarong Katniss had disposed of when morph into her wolf form around her shoulders, hiding her small belly.

“They hurt you, Peeta,” Katniss whispered, “because of me.”

His hand gently rubbed her back, and she curled into his lap, desperate to make him feel better.

“I’m okay, I’ll be fine,” Peeta assured her.

“Katniss,” their father addressed her.

Katniss looked up to see their father looking at her with concern. Her father was always prone to notice details others missed. His silver eyes didn’t miss the way Peeta tenderly held her or the way she acted.

“I didn’t mean for this to happen,” Adam said, “but you must see why, what you’ve done is an abomination.  You’re my children.”

Katniss closed her eyes and said, “We left so that you wouldn’t have to live with our decision.”

Adam rubbed his face then roared, “Katniss, don’t you dare defend him; this is his fault. This child has been nothing but trouble.”

 Their mother came up behind their father. “Adam, you’ve always been harder on the boy.”

Adam said, “But she’s his sister, Ava.”

“I love him,” Katniss confessed. “He’s my mate. I tried to ignore it but I couldn’t. I had to be with him, had to bond with him.” Katniss recalled the first time they kissed. It was if she was lit on fire from within, and a hunger for him ripped through her, naked desire for Peeta.

“We didn’t mean for this to happen. I know Katniss wasn’t supposed to be mine.” Peeta looked at Katniss. “I can’t live without her and you both know…”

“Katniss has always needed you,” Ava whispered. “When your father made you stay that summer with Uncle Haymitch, Katniss didn’t want to eat, and couldn’t sleep.”

Adam barked, “No, Ava, do not justify what happened. They are brother and sister!”

“They are soul-mates, and we’ve known it for years. Even as children they behaved not as siblings, but future companion,” Ava sighed heavily. “I am afraid there was nothing we could do; you know as well as I do if they hadn’t mated they would’ve found a way.”

 A gentle howl penetrated the air.

People whispered to one another. There was a matron within their pack, an elder who had taken Peeta under her wing when he was a pup. She was the oldest amongst them. Greasy Sae was so old her gray black fur looked silver when she morphed into her wolf form. She was the only original wolf alive from when their kind settled in this area, hundreds of years ago. Her great-great-granddaughter led her through the woods. She had a shawl wrapped around her frail body.

Adam paid his respects, “Greasy, we are most honored.”

Greasy nodded as she walked past Adam and knelt before Katniss and Peeta. “It’s finally happened.”

“Just as you said it would, they’ve mated,” Ava whispered.

“It’s only natural,” Greasy stated patting Katniss face.

“Greasy they are siblings,” Adam muttered, casting his eyes away from Katniss and Peeta.

“Are they?” Greasy countered back. “You’ve always had a temper just like your half brother Earl. It’s why Ava was captured she was chasing after your brother after one of your hot headed arguments, or do you no recall what happened eighteen years ago today?”

Adam, voice was tempered but all could see he was still angered, “Sae why bring up the past.”

Sae stood before Katniss, “Because it is relevant and it has to do with the children.”

Katniss was confused, “What is she speaking of?”

Katniss watched her father sit on a fallen log. “We agreed never to speak about it.”

“But we must, for now there is the life of an unborn pup at stake,” Greasy said chuckling.

Katniss blushed, it was Greasy who guessed she was pregnant. It explained her mood swings, her inability to stomach certain foods or people. She felt Peeta’s hand lay across her midsection protectively. Katniss could feel him getting better, it made her body ache less. She glanced into his shining eyes. He was excited he was going to be a father.

“Before you were born, Ava was captured by Snow. Your mother was, as I said before, looking for Earl. No one knew Snow had the area under surveillance. He was looking for any opportunity to control your father and a few of his strongest trapped your mother.”

Katniss eyes flew to her mother who by now sat clutching her father's arm. Adam wound his arm around Ava. “It was horrible, she had a difficult pregnancy. Trying to escape, she went into labor.”

“She gave birth in the forest without anyone to assist her during her birth. She was bleeding.” Adam gently looked at Ava, “At the first sign of blood they left. We were lucky we found her in the forest when we did.”

“How did you find them?”

“Katniss and Prim were together, in their human form. Peeta was in his pup form covering them.” Adam said, shaking his head. “Why go over this Greasy? You were there.”

“Since when have you ever heard of a newborn being able to transform hours after they were born?” Greasy’s words suddenly made everything click.

Katniss glanced at her husband, hope blossomed in her silver eyes. It was a well know fact, newborns needed up to a week to be able to make that transition. They were not yet strong enough, and some pups do not morph until they are three months old. Greasy then followed up with, “Peeta is not part of your pack.”

There was silence amongst as all eyes turned to Peeta.

“He must have felt the pull toward Katniss, and went to her aid. It was his infant howls that drew you to where Ava and the girls were. He was protecting his mate.”

“He doesn’t even look like us,” Gale whispered.

“He doesn’t for a good reason,” a new voice said. “He’s more typical of the wolves from the northern fringes.” The clans’ men all stood at once at the appearance of three strangers standing at the cliff. The light was behind them, and growls were heard.

“Stand down, it’s me,” Haymitch’s gruff voice came from the top of the cliff.

“Haymitch,” the word spread amongst those gathered as they watched Haymitch and two others slowly descended, when they arrived Katniss gasped. One of the men looked like Peeta, an older version, but it was Peeta’s face.

“My son, you have indeed found my son,” the man spoke.

Peeta stood amazed at the man that looked like him. “Father?”

Adam was perplexed, “Haymitch, what is the meaning of this?”

Haymitch rubbed the back of his neck. “I’d forgotten what they looked like, it was done over nineteen years ago, before the girls were born. We’ve maintained in contact through missives. It wasn’t until I went to get them that I discovered Harland was Peeta’s father.  Eighteen years ago, Peeta’s dad and a group of his men were in this part of the woods looking for a peaceful resolution with Snow. Snow attacked them, and Peeta was lost in the mix.”

“I thought him dead, and when your Haymitch told me of his existence and that he was interested in your eldest girl, I had to come see for myself.”  Harland grabbed his son by the face. He turned to Adam. “I am indebted to you. For you did not have to take care of him, but you’ve made him your own child.”

Katniss could see her father had no words, she stepped up. “I carry your grandchild.”

He was quiet, then laughed, then howled mightily. He transformed into a massive pure white wolf just like Peeta. Katniss smiled and was glad she’d followed her heart.

[melancholy-queen]

REIGN SPOILERS AHEAD

i’m putting all of my thoughts about the series reign on this, i probably forgot a lot of shit, but thats okay. also I’m sorry if this is very long, i have lots of opinions. scroll past!

so im on season 3 episode 7 and here are my thoughts as of this moment:

- francis is everything but also he was so controlling of mary jfc

- nostradamus is really hot

- im sad for mary that francis is dead

- frary is endgame

- but i was totally down for bash and mary to get married

- conde was so hot. i miss him already

- i was not down for the whole cheating plot line with mary

- antoine needs to chill and stop being so vengeful

- kenna is a piece of shit, i mean stop self sabotaging yourself please for the love of god

- so apparently, kenna was masterbating on the staircase in the pilot? i thought she ran out of breath from walking up all those goddamn stairs (chill, this is a joke, but i still think it's funny that she couldn't wait to get to her room)

- henry was fucking gross from the minute he walked on screen

- did everyone forget about aylee?

- poor lola, she couldve been so much more

- on the topic of lola, where tf did john philippe go? like he hasn't been in the past few episodes

- bash is so great

- bash does no wrong, i love him

- i liked diane and i miss her

- leith is honestly the most tragic character in this whole show, i love him

- megan follows does such an amazing job, like she is such a good actress

- why tf couldn't greer marry leith? i guess im just not understanding

- they totally brushed off the whole incest thing between claude and bash, gross

- but also good for greer, she's a great madam

- i don't give any shits about lord narcissi

- i loveeee claude and leith, get married pls

- i really wanted mary and francis to have a child and i almost cried at the miscarriage

- charles is a dick, but also fuck me

- catherine de medici is the best thing to have graced this show, i mean fuck me up bitch ahhh

- poor mary! its so sad that she was raped. to me, the show handled the repercussions fairly well

- i liked the whole catherine going crazy plot line, i thought the writers did a good job with her emotions towards her children

- the end did not pay off though, like how did she get better?

- also, the crazy henry plot line was ass, but i liked it almost?

- i thought the francis killing henry was done very well, subtle, but not out of the blue. plus, you could go back and look at the clues in previous episodes to aid to the murder

and now these are my thoughts past season 3, episode 7 all the way to the end:

- yes i want some bdsm in this bitch fuck it up queen

- catherine and mary are so kinky hahahaahahha

- mary's pussy literally killed don carlos (jk)

- this is the best plot line on this show so far lmao

- i like it better when mary and catherine get along

- god i love princess claude

- i hate narcisse

- fuck narcisse

- even though claude's fucking stupid for writing that her mother poisoned her in her diary and not hiding the diary well, i still love her

- narcisse's secretary is hot in a lowkey kind of way

- also, his death scene was very unrealistic

- thank god lola is leaving, fuck narcisse

- i don't like elizabeth, but i guess im not supposed to

- why does claude have to fuck up leith like that? he's already traumatized by greer

- greer is honestly the secret mvp, what a good woman

- i am more invested in claude and leith's story then anything else in this entire show

- i feel so bad for dudley's wife, she didn't ask for this

- catherine is a sex queen and i stan her

- stubble leith is so hot

- adelaide kane is so fucking pretty goddamn

- honestly, fuck the prince of spain

- charles looks like mary and francis' child grown up tbh

- i have no investment in any of the england storyline

- why do none of the ladies in waiting get a normal marriage and life jeez louise

- CLAUDE DESERVES BETTER

- LEITH DESERVES BETTER

- FUCK THE DUKE WHO MARRIED CLAUDE

- CLAUDE IS A QUEEN WTF I LOVE HER SO MUCH I WANT TO MARRY HER OML

- narcisse can suck my dick

- im all for in charge charles

- i don't like gideon

- i have no investment in the elizabeth/dudley shep, but i still find it really sad

- god i hope that gideon doesn't stab mary in the back

- christophe is really creepy

- my inStiNctS weRe cOrRecT jEsuS ChrISt, christophe is insane

- gideon is also insane

- bash is perfect

- bash needs better sleuthing skills

- i fully support the lola and elizabeth friendship

- mary and gideon have no chemistry haha

- DEAR GOD I LOVE LEITH AND CLAUDE

- greer is so strong, i love her

- I’m so for greer and leith’s friendship

- jc not the bash love storyline again

- i totally forgot mary killed narcisse’s son

- wait at what point did mary meet her ladies??

- literally the only part in this show so far to make cry is when mary went back to defend catherine tbh

- idk why i feel sympathy for catherine

- if bash dies i will stop watching

- thank god

- elizabeth is honestly a better friend to lola than mary was

- charles is so dumb

- god why can’t he learn anything, obviously his friend was a traitor

- charles’ traitor friend is bobo nick jonas

- dark mary is my everything

- claude is her mother’s carbon copy

- the valois children have other siblings? where are they and why haven’t we heard of them?????

- munro is so hot

- bash is actually fucking insane

- why is charles so trustworthy?

- when did james become hot?

- mary is so great when she’s not needy and crying for a romance

- how does everyone just kill people so easily??? i can’t even get my blood drawn without wanting to throw up

- lola is HEARTLESS

- IM SO DOWN FOR A CLAUDE/LEITH WEDDING

- also troye sivan? i love it

- charles totally sucks

- wait what happened with the pagans in the blood woods?

- i cannot stand gideon and mary together

- i’m so sad for lola, she was such a good character

- dear god, this was the only death that i’m actually sad for (and this includes francis)

- i want more for john philippe

- NO I TAKE THAT BACK POOR LEITH

- knox is such a creep

- marys brother needs to stop

- i’m so down with seer bash you guys don’t even understand

- mary is wild omg i love this turn around

- when did james get so hot

- lola and francis’ child is so fucking cute omg

- charles’ mental breakdown is crazy

- ewwww gideon and mary are gross af

- I’m all for darnley

- poor claude honestly, but she is a saint

- if he hurts her, ill beat him up

- damn charles is a vampire

- leith deserved so much better

- i love him

- dude i don’t even give a shit about the other relationships in this show, leith and claude are the greatest

- poor leith, I’m so sad

- agatha’s death is so fucking depressing

- i love mary when she actually has a backbone

- yes motherfucker, murder darnley

- i have no sympathy for darnley’s true love dying, he’s so rude and deceiving

- i love the friendship between catherine and mary ahh

- i don’t know how i feel about greer and james

- where did lady kenna go?

- i like the juxtaposition between mary and francis’ wedding and mary and darnley’s wedding with the flowers and attendees and just overall feeling and how adelaide kane acted in it. you could tell that she truly loved francis but doesn’t love darnley and feels scared with him

- also the fact that mary doesn’t match with darnley’s outfits is an interesting choice

- the timeline on this show is very strange

- claude’s character development is beautiful

- the horny witch is my fav

- umm what she’s pregnant?

- nicole can suck my fucking ass fuck her stupid ass

- i wish the end wasn’t so abrupt tbh

- the last five minutes was so good, i teared up

- ugh now i feel empty inside and want to watch it again!!

ugh this show is so good, like insanely good. i feel like most of the time the characterization was wonderful. claude was my favorite, so its no surprise i like claude and leith the best. i didn’t like francis most of the time while he was alive but i missed his presence on the show. bash was an absolute gem. adelaide kane is so hot oml i died multiple times. i really enjoyed watching it!!!

rate: 9/10 archduchesses falling out of a window during sex (still my favorite part of the show)

favorite character: claude! queen catherine!! runner ups: bash, greer, leith, sometimes mary, elizabeth at the endish

favorite season: season 1!! can’t beat the drama!

[the-uptake]

The Uptake, The 704. 3|0|0|-. Book 1, Chapter Eight, Part Two. (Part 1)

Necrophilic incest and body horror tw’s.

“Slaggit, Gale,” Torber called out after, beyond concerned as he he tried to catch up from having been stricken dumb. “What’d you even want from meeting me like this!”

Galen motioned to the folding chair and small card table in the middle of the enclosure, insisting it be Torber’s rightful dining arrangement. The light was best there on this floor, the streetlight filtering in from outside through an open space in what was supposed to be the floor above. He’d already tossed down the hoodie on the countertop in what appeared to have been a test setup for a kitchen space.

“I, I. I needed t’see you, ‘Nite. Nn, needed t’talk t’somebody’d get it.” He noticed Torber pacing and sighed. “Comon. Eat. I, I know ya. Y’don’t even eat lunch half the time ‘cause y’get caught up in the yards.”

“…Always known me too well,” Torber conceded, ravenous. He ripped into the bag and fished out the bag fries while he set out the burger. He refrained from elaborating that much of his time in the yards in the past months had been searching tirelessly for Galen. Through a mouthful of pickle and onion and deliberate calm, “But really, man. How y’been holdin’ up? What happened t’you?”

He could hear Galen digging around in the doorless cabinets above the counter, could see his silhouette, but had less than a clue what his brother was digging for. The crinkle of packaging. The sound of plastic jugs getting pushed around. He hated that the veil of darkness lent so much to his imagination.

“Been better.”

Torber could hear him open a bottle and take a drink, and the faint smell he picked up left him thinking Galen was drinking.

“Forgive me f’eatin’. Ss, stomach’s been gnawin’ bad at me all sss, slaggin’ day.”

«Oh god.» “S–” Torber cleared his throat and washed down his food with the soda, to break through his voice cracking. “It’s only fair we both eat.” A weak offering, as he wasn’t even sure how–or whether–to quash Galen’s apologizing for eating. “Y’sure y’don’t want any?” He held up his cup.

The sound of Galen swallowing in the dark was the only response he got for a moment.

“…Positive.”

Cardboard packaging tore, and something rattled, then Torber saw Galen clap a hand over his mouth as to swallow pills. Galen slouched at the counter with a heavy sigh.

“…Y’still eatin’ junk, yeah,” Torber fielded, shakily grabbing for a few fries.

“…Ss, s’all I eat now.”

The elder distilled inside himself before he could no longer stand not asking.

“Wh– whatcha over there eatin’? There’s two chairs over here…”

“Don’t ask. Y’still eatin’.” A long, uncomfortable silence, wherein both were too hungry to keep themselves from tearing into their respective meals at opposite ends of the space. “…Got somethin’ for ya.” Without waiting for a response, Galen walked over to the table, his heavy boot-clad steps reverberating through the cement floor space. “S’a sorta lemonade-from-lemons kinduva thing, how I happened on it, but.”

He removed his right glove and slipped it into his back pocket and took a seat, then made a gesture like a tired, washed up magician demonstrating to the awestruck child that with a bare arm he could not possibly have anything up his sleeve. As he ran his hand along the tabletop, his features tightened in concentration, and a residue began to accumulate. The smear offered a weak reflection. Utter entrancement rapidly replaced all Torber’s fears in that moment, and he leaned in to stare, his hand hovering holding fries that couldn’t quite find his mouth.

“Nonmetal, I burn off. Gut chews it all up. Metal, though? …I sweat metal now.” Galen lingered on how he’d learned the next part, heart heavy from the past few months. “My body’s streamlined t’ingest metals. Everything I eat’t ain’t a metal, it’s there t’make my stomach able to, well, able t’stomach it.”

The toxic nostalgia shuddered out of him and he concentrated on his demonstration, holding his hand slightly off the tabletop. Slowly he drew it further and further away as he gestured mystically, letting the excretion build up alongside the cathartic adrenaline-dread that invoked it flow out of him. A solid but irregularly shaped block of metal took form beneath his palm. When Galen withdrew his hand, Torber could out a faint outline of what looked like some kind of crystal formation.

“Been tryin’ t’experiment with bein’ more creative with it, maybe get t’where I can pass it off as art.” Galen broke the now hardened creation from the table with a flat snap and set it before his brother. A sulfurous, salty musk wafted over along with it. “A solid hunk of pure copper, Torb. S’worth somethin’, right? I can provide for us again.”

A fry fell from Torber’s mouth. Stupefied, he could only gawk at the gift before him. That hunk of metal had to represent easily twenty creds on its own, to the right buyer. Even more, if the receiving end was impressed by a pleasing presentation. It certainly explained why his brother was casually wearing gloves, at least. He’d always had an issue with sweaty palms. Yet, to be able to do these things–at what cost to his health? Really, the undertaking Galen was implying wasn’t all that far off from what stalkers risked on a daily basis diving in the yards–just flashier, more freakish. Was his brother even human anymore? He noticed the ghoul picking the vestige-smears off the table and eating the resultant flakes, and stared absently. Galen stopped when he noticed he was being stared at, and glanced up to give him a smile jammed with self-consciousness.

“Th– that was disgusting, yeah? That, th– that just came outta my body not two minutes ago, an’ I just, just, j– ate it?” He laughed weakly, wincing into his tics. He’d never given it a second thought before. But then again, he didn’t really eat in front of people like this. Had he really grown so accustomed to his condition, that the lines had been blurred between edible and already-eaten? “Ugh.”

“–Gale.” Torber stood and came over to sit next to him on the edge of the card table. Some deep-seated dread within him still couldn’t shake that this figure which had beckoned him might simply be a mock echo of his brother. The duality beguiled him. “Y’ain’t disgusting–”

“–Y’ain’t seen how I get.” The ghoul grabbed Torber’s hand and in the dimness guided a few fingers to feel his features as he spoke of them. “Buncha teeth’ve fell out. My right eye’s all slagged up. Not t’mention how bad my skin’s crackin’ apart…” He got really quiet and held Torber’s hand to his crusty, pale chest, letting go for Torber to linger there himself to mull over an apparent lack of heartbeat. “…Y’should probably wipe off y’hand. Not sure what it’d even do t’human skin.”

Torber stifled his skincrawling fear best he could of not knowing what coated his fingers, and he calmly reached behind him for a napkin and wiped it off. Sweat, saliva… Close up, he could tell now that rotten smell had been Galen. Yet… He began to build a little nerve. It had been difficult to separate the demonstrative gesture of having had his fingers drawn into Galen’s mouth as anything but intimate. He had to tell him now. He had to. Galen was miserable, and Torber knew this was more than him needing Galen. They needed each other.

He grabbed a fistful of the collar of Galen’s threadbare, stained tank, and dragged him closer. Mere inches apart, urgency thickened his terror.

“I have always felt close as hell t’you, man. This don’t change a thing. Y’not dead t’me. Y’just…” a jolt shot through him, recalling the clammy, tepid feel of Galen’s pulseless chest, “dead. Y’not disgusting. Y’not a monster. An’ y’certainly not ugly.”

Completely disregarding the possibility the saliva was dangerous, he pressed his lips forcefully to Galen’s; electricity in the act throttled him past the overwhelming taste and smell of soap. Galen melted into shock and confusion, brows knitted ever so slightly as he tried to make sense of it, and both their eyes drifted shut. Torber was first to break away, self-consciousness setting in without warning. He looked Galen in the eye again and stroked the scruffy back of his head firmly, reassuringly, with his free hand.

“Y’beautiful, ‘Lena. Always thought y’was beautiful.”

Beautiful. He could stomach it all until that word. Then the appellation swung a right hook to his head. Galen shoved his brother off of him, clicking back into reality with the cognizance who’d just kissed him. How had he gotten so lost in such a simple act of intimacy that even for a fraction he’d forgotten the other participant was a guy, was his brother? Was he really this touch-starved? The ghoul rose and backed off to pace a bit, clenching his hands in his scrawny undercut.

“Y, y’gay, Torber? Y’like guys? …Y’like ME?”

He couldn’t. He just couldn’t.

Standing, Torber approached Galen while still giving him space.

“I… know it’s weird. But y’deserve t’know how deep I feel f’ya. Don’t expect y’ta feel the same.”

Galen slumped down on the bare mattress off a ways in the floor, facing away from him half-fetal. Nothing made sense.

“Then what did y’expect?”

“I, I don’t know. I just… I miss you. I don’t wanna… I can’t lose y’again…” Torber looked at the silhouette of the bed in the dim light, trailing off at realizing how much of a stressor his last remark must have been. “–Chouaaaay that’s a big mattress, man. Don’t think I ever seen one that big.”

Galen turned to glance up at him over the shoulder, dully, anxiously welcoming the change of subject. His brain was a clump of wet yarn, being put on the spot to sort all this out.

“It is pretty big, yeah? Think it’s a queen. Found it in the back end of the lot. Same with lotta the other junk I dragged up in here.”

Torber laid down next to him, and put a hand to his shoulder.

“I lost a lotta sleep while you was gone.”

«Me, too.» Galen bristled at how short the reprieve had been, but still welcomed it somehow, relinquishing the wheel to his older brother for what was otherwise too much for him to process. “It’s… hard gettin’ used t’havin’ an empty bed when y’shared one with a sibling all y’life, yeah?” He pushed himself into Torber’s contours, and took his arm around him. “…It don’t bother me y’gay, ‘Nite.”

“Didn’t think it would.” Torber calmly stroked his brother’s stiff, stringy hair, and drifted into thought. “…I ain’t dreamin’ this, yeah?” The words got a little stuck in his throat. “…I… don’t know what y’are anymore… ‘At’s okay, though.”

A weak chuckle trickled out of Galen as he leaned his scalp into Torber’s hand.

“Yeah. Folks don’t usually eat a pack a batteries, n’chase it with detergent. Let alone that thing with the metals…”

“This is kinda cool.” Torber smiled, nestling his face against Galen’s neck. “Y’know, Orpi an’ Ruti would think it was real cool, in a gross kinda way.”

“Vana’d probably scream she’d wanna puke just t’voice how cool-gross it was.” Isolation bristled him into a depressed stupor. “…Just shut up and hold me.”

The demand was met, the two pressed tightly together on the mattress. Torber just couldn’t stay quiet, though, and Galen knotted up all over again the instant he started back up.

“Y’oughtta come back… I’m positive they’d get it. Imagine y’usually under that hoodie, any rate.” Torber sighed, oblivious as he overstepped Galen’s bubble by letting his fingers wander from Galen’s hair to gently running a knuckle along the scarring of the ghoul’s cheek. “…Please…”

“I told ya. Y’ain’t seen how I get. Nobody gets how I get. How I am now ain’t nothin’ compared to that.”

“I don’t blame ya for what happened on ‘Piphany.”

Galen pulled away and deadweighted into the mattress with a huff, crossing his arms tightly against his chest.

“…I get too heavy t’even move.” It was an ordeal to spare his brother every imagery he could, but the impulse to be as candid with Torber as he’d been with him been lit a fire in Galen, and he did his best. The thoughts were fumbling, and the words did an even greater disservice to the condition they were meant to describe. “…I swell up real bad…”

Suddenly, Torber understood it wasn’t so much a mental state Galen described as a physical one, and he sat up, increasingly concerned. He couldn’t even wrap his head around the description he’d just been fed.

“Wh. How d’ya take care of y’self when y’like that?”

“I sleep it off.”

“What if somebody came across you? Can y’defend yourself?” Contrary to his composure, his voice continued to build in concern and volume. “What if y’other eye gives out? You’d be blind!” Torber grabbed him and shoved him backwards supine on the mattress, and forced him to look him in the eye with his good eye. “Please come home. We can take care of ya.”

“Y’don’t get it! Y’can’t take care of me! An’ y’might be able t’find some kind of attraction in how I am right now, but y’really would puke if y’saw what this hunger turns me into!”

Wet eyes reflected in the dark over Galen, and a drip fell on his chest.

“I don’t believe you.

Galen shoved Torber off him and leapt to fly to the cabinets. As he scrambled for something, everything got knocked over. Desperation overcame him. He had to snuff this pleading once and for all.

This wasn’t what he wanted from this encounter, not at all.

“I was hopin’ I wouldn’t hafta dip into this f’a long time, an’ this definitely ain’t what I kept it for.” The ghoul held it up, and the angular surfaces of the amber glass glistened. “I found it in an abandoned medical buildin’. Liquid mercury. Got some other metals in it, but it’s near pure. ‘Bout fifteen pounds worth. …Didn’t get like this eatin’ slaggin’ batteries. Y’wanna see how slagged I get? How slagged I really get? Don’t get much worse n’it does with mercury. It’s already liquid. Cuts right through me. Don’t even hardly digest it first.”

Torber shot up on the bed, frantic to grasp what was transpiring in the near-darkness.

“–Gale, don’t. Y’don’t gotta prove a thing t’me. Y’don’t gotta–” The elder cut off when he heard the cork pop out, and he saw the bottle go to his brother’s lips. “Gale–” He reached out vainly in horror, forced to watch having driven his brother to poison himself.

For how heavy the bottle had been, it only took about three solid chugs for Galen to drain the bottle dry. The liquid saturated every surface, every tissue, that it touched. Within seconds the tics and tremors began. The bottle fell from his hands, glass shattering the uncomfortable silence. The stuff sank right to the bottom of his gut. Breathing heavy, he took labored, deliberate steps toward Torber. His motor skills were rapidly deteriorating, but if he put enough thought into each step…

Torber scrambled back, convinced that breaking the bottle had been anything but accidental, and he scrambled to his feet. Galen pursued, though slowly.

Out into the empty air. Good. Torber would see better that way.

Galen could already tell the bloating had begun, his neck tight.

“This what, hat–t–t– a din, dinky lil’ bott, bottl’ll, lll, do do to me. An’ my hunger can, can drive me. Drive me t’eat hundreds a pounds this shit, hit, it. IT.” He evened his stance, as steady as he could get, and glared at Torber.

The edemic masses blistered up around his thyroid, clustered tight flushed a deep bruised purple, marred with wiry dark veins. As each swelled to a certain size, they fell translucent, the orange of the low sodium lights granting an even more disturbing appearance to his liquefying necrosis. His skin wept quicksilver.

“LOOK AT ME!”

His mouth had swelled in much the similar fashion, his gums and tongue having absorbed more than enough to spur a reaction just from the contact of the act of ingestion, and he curled his lips to bare his bloating gumline and shifting teeth.

“T, t, tell ‘e I ain’t ugly. T, t, t, t, t– this gh’retty. ‘T, tractive. YEAU’IFUL.”

The inarticulate, distended words held just as much venom as the bottled Galen had just inhaled. Drool poured uselessly from the corners of his mouth as fluid retention tightened his mucous membranes. When Torber stumbled on a rock and cried out, Galen screeched at him, a horrid, rasping, pleural, metal-rending sound, as his entire body reverberated its contents. Torber fell back against the chain link fence, and tangled up the fingers of one hand up in the wire lattice behind him, to shield himself with the other. He tried in vain to hold back tears as his terror kicked his legs in the mud with his utility boots, unable to gain traction.

“It’nhhh think tho. ���Get out.”

Torber couldn’t stand fast enough to satisfy Galen. The creature’s spasms and twitches only magnified his mercurial anguish.

“GET! OUT!”

As Torber finally managed to scramble up the fence to escape, Galen watched him sprint. His brother looked back, just once. To make sure he hadn’t been chased.

«Little shit, y’better run.»

Galen didn’t stand there long. He shambled back into the shadows as his condition deteriorated further. If he’d had his faculties, he would have likened the gaps in his mental processes to Swiss cheese. He slumped himself into the calming, chill frame of the bathtub. A long, gurgling sigh sprung from him as the swelling started squeezing his breath from him. The entire place was trashed, and he was soon to be just as bad off. He could smell the bits of food Torber had been interrupted from finishing off, and the characteristic smell of the copper which he’d sweat-sculpted for him.

“Get… ow… wwww…” he whispered to himself again, suddenly too upset to hold it back any longer, hands to his tumescent throat as his lungs wheezed shut.

A few weeks later, Galen started out from the construction site to satisfy a craving which he couldn’t quite pinpoint, but which he knew the site could not remedy. A box sat just inside the fence at the gate which surrounded the complex. He approached it and brought it back inside. Crouching over the mattress, he opened the box to find a cake. Well, what resembled a cake, anyway. He almost made a face at someone having given him real food, but his sense of smell told him otherwise. On an impulse he stuck a bare finger in it, to find it wasn’t icing, or cake. His fingertip stopped just half an inch down. He smelled his finger, and his head fell to one side as he stuck it in his mouth to suck it clean.

“Caulk.”

He smeared a little of the half-cured caulk away to determine what it had covered, exposing a styrofoam block. The bizarre craft project had a single candle planted atop it, and was sprinkled wish nuts and washers. He pulled the card from where it had been taped to the inside of the box lid. Upon reading it, he couldn’t stop the drool from running, and fell sniveling fiercely from his crouch onto his butt.

||I didn’t forget. Miss you.||

««« Back to Part 1

[caspianseasblog]

B with an Opinion James Gunn

Disclaimer:  I will not normally talk about politically charged topics but with this one I feel a strong urge to talk about it. If you don’t want to listen to a b with an opinion, I urge you to move one.

 As we found out a couple of weeks ago, James Gun was fired for three tweets that he made back in 2010. This was a concerted effort to get Gunn fired by the alt-right, specifically Mike Cernovich. For those that don’t know who he is, let me enlighten you. He is an alt-right nut job who doesn’t believe rape and specifically date rape exist. He constantly post and tweets about his semen and how works out make his semen better.  He is also responsible for Pizzagate which almost led to a mass shooting of a pizza shop when one of his unstable minions held the staff at gun point demanding to see the children that cernovich had said Hillary and gang were holding in the basement of the pizza shop. One problem with that conspiracy theory. The named pizza joint did not have a basement.  Cernovich didn’t care and vowed to keep it going.

 Well the Gunn rehire battle has taken a decidedly interesting turn. Today on twitter it was reported that Tom Hiddleston, Tom Holland, Chris Evans Chris Hemsworth and RDJ unfollowed James Gunn on social media. They, being the right and the assorted psycho fan, translated that into they don’t support James Gunn but what it actually means is they don’t want mike cernovich and his minions to come after them too. The attacks on the GOTG cast for voicing their support of Gunn is going beyond the sublime and stupid. Not only is there 10,000 tweets but now they are saying he described what he did to a child in a tweet and yet they can't come up with the child's name so Gunn can be prosecuted. The right is desperate to stop the truth from coming out

 They, meaning Tom Hiddleston, Chris Evans, Chris Hemsworth and the others haven’t taken the time to research the originator of the pressure on Disney to fire James Gunn. They don’t want to deal with consequences of speaking out in support.That person being Mike Cernovich. He is the vilest and disgusting person on earth.

 “Rape via an alpha male is different from other forms of rape. We can't really understand this, as our culture is too detached from instinct.”

—Twitter, September 2013

Source: https://www.splcenter.org/fighting-hate/extremist-files/individual/mike-cernovich

 These are just a few that I found of him talking about his sperm, rape and alpha male. Let’s not forget his book about gorilla mindset raved about by General Flynn.

 My first thought, when I read this, was here is your child molester. He shows all the signs that I only saw in the guy I put in jail for attempting to rape his step daughter in my apartment. The arrogant egotistical drive to think they are better than everyone else. This is seen in the way he treats women in social media. He went after women game creators starting gamergate, He went after Kelly Marie Tran just because she was blessed to be born an Asian and get a leading role in Star Wars.

 The alt-rights only reason for getting the tweets out to their minions was to exact political revenge on Gunn and his anti-trump stance and his willingness to put it out there. I also suspect there is a tinge of revenge against Disney for not firing Kelly Marie Tran. Cernovich has said that he uses troll tactics to cause and uproar as a way of getting his name out there building his brand. That is all he sees is the brand and the money but that should not be a surprise to anyone. He tweeted celebrating the seven figure alimony check his ex-wife sends him. Doesn’t it sink into his microscopic sized brain that if starts making those 7 figure dollar amts, his wife can ask the court to stop forcing her to pay alimony? I think not

Cernovich got really going with Pizzagate. They ended with one of his unstable minions going into a pizza shop and demanding to see the basement where the kids were kept. The only problem was the shop didn't have a basement. People could of died but cernovich didn't care. He tweeted that he would keep it going.

 Exhibit 2

 Exhibit 3

Then on the legal side of things there is a debate over whether or not Gunn needs to take cernovich and Disney to court. I hope he does but it’s likely he won’t. We need to show these idiots that there are serious consequences for this crap.

Unfortunately, the alt-right has now moved on to attacking Patton Oswalt and Thomas Ian Black for their anti-trump stance.

The tweets that Gunn tweeted ten years ago, those people that stopped liking him for the tweets, saying it was disgusting or he should be prosecuted for it, fell victim to the weaponizing of the topic of pedophilia. These people have only served to victimize victims once more. People who need to tell the story of their abusers are not going to want to come out if they feel their story will be used to demonize someone else using their story.

I know firsthand about the effect a pedophile has. Your already demoralized and lacking self-esteem for one. Secondly, there is a shame attached with being a victim. Many people who claim they are a victim of a pedophile typically waited years to tell their story for fear of not being believe. That does not take a joke, insensitive as it was to create.

 Another thing to point out was at the time of Gunn's tweets there were comedians doing a lot worse on social media and in their acts regarding pedophilia, rape and even incest but where is the moral rage at that. Oh that person is a comedian so it’s okay. The fans are exhibiting a double standard in the way they address topics like pedophilia. Like I said the people who are not liking gunn because of the tweets are missing the real point behind the alt-right use of these tweets.

 A third thing to point out to you is that the followers of Mike Cernovich think he can do no wrong but you look at the posts above and the many more you can find  doing a google search of Mike cernovich are far worse then what Gunn posted.

 Exhibit 4

He is also responsible for the attacks on Kelly Marie Tran just because she had fortune to be born Asian and get a leading role in a star wars movie.

 This is why people are now drawing false equivalence between Roseanne and James Gunn when there isn't any to be drawn. Roseanne was tweeting racist crap since the days of her first show and continued to do so until she was told to get the reboot, she had to stop. She got fired not totally due to the racist tweet about Valerie Jarrett but because she never stopped tweeting as she was likely required to do so she could get the show back on the air.

When she was fired, she never took responsibility for what she posted and tweeted. She blamed everyone else and everything else for what she did and this is where Gunn differs from her.

 Gunn owned up to the tweets he made, He didn't blame a drug he was taking. He didn't blame another human. He owned the tweets and apologized for them om 2012. The key difference is he actually stopped tweeting tweets like that. It is so easy to assume there is a double standard in play here. But we must pay attention to the details and not to base any of our conclusions on our first responses to something posted or tweeted in social media.

 If the tweets have done any good, it has been to showcase the damage that the alt right is doing to people's lives and corporations. We can put up barriers to them. social media sites need to ban them especially mike cernovich and his tweets about his sperm and raping women. We can become people with a clue and use reasoned discourse as a tool to deal with standards put on us. The fight to stop these alt-right so called journalists is going to be long and tough. We must not let them co-opt the anger.  We must take the anger we have and put it towards those who would weaponized our very thoughts and beliefs against us.

 Twisted tales turn another twist. Chris Evans, Chris Hemsworth, Tom Holland, Tom Hiddleston and Mark Ruffalo have reportedly gone on their social media and unfollowed Gunn. This led to a cascade of right wingers saying that because they worked with him, they knew that the tweets really proved that Gunn was a pedophile when what it proved is that the people who unfollowed Gunn were trying to keep cernovich from attacking them. All it says is that they don’t want alt-right to attack them for supporting Gunn.

 To many people jump to conclusions before getting all the facts.

 Now the tide is turning against Mike Cernovich and Alex Jones. Alex Jones’s podcast has been pulled from a number of media outlets. Spotify announced that they had pulled his podcasts for violating their standards.  Now we need to do the same with Mike Cernovich. When you remove them from their ability to get their words of hate out to the masses then we mute the lies they tell and the damage they cause.

  Sources:

1.     https://www.nytimes.com/2017/04/05/us/politics/mike-cernovich-bio-who.html

2.     Southern Poverty Law Center.

[plinys]

dear yuletide author (2017)

hello and welcome to my letter!

i am so happy to have you reading this letter and going to be writing a fic for me! why? because you dear writer are an amazing and wonderful person, deserving of all the kudos in the world!

please remember as you look at these prompts, that if something in my likes inspires you more than any of my specific prompts, totally feel free and run with that, and know that i will enjoy any fic that is gifted to me!!

ao3/lj handle: plinys

now lets get down to business:

the fandoms i’ve requested this year are: Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator,  Galavant (TV),   Legion (TV),  Powerless (TV 2017),  Star Trek: Discovery,  Young & Hungry

but before that, my likes/kinks/dislikes/triggers:

likes: alternate universes, characters that are in character, lady-centric fics, angst, fandom cliches, dysfunctional relationships, friendships, friends/enemies to lovers, soul mates, road trips,  hanukkah fics, jewish characters, bisexual characters, poly relationships, character studies, origin stories, ambiguous endings, meta fic, slow build, fics that incorporate social media, crack treated seriously, drunk confessions, miscommunication, 

kinks: threesomes, competence kink, phone sex, masturbation, crying during sex, hate sex, shower sex, praise kink, guys going down on girls, rough sex, first time, spanking, daddy kink, sex in front of mirrors, voyeurism, make up sex

dislikes: pwp, main character death (unless it really makes sense/happens in canon), character bashing, non-con, mpreg, a/b/o, 1st person.

my triggers (please no matter what do not include these): school shootings, cancer, terminal illness, riots, child abuse.

and now to the fun stuff -

Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator

requested characters:  mary christiansen, joseph christiansen, crish christiansen

where to find: it’s a video game on steam, you can purchase for about $15, otherwise there’s plenty of walkthroughs of people playing it on youtube. recommended routes: joseph, robert, and damien to get the full christiansen story family backstory. 

anyways first play through i did josephs route and he broke my heart, and i was like wow mary deserves better and then after playing robert and damien i was like no wow mary deserves the world, so as long as your gift doesn’t include mary bashing im happy

would love any backstory on this family (featuring robert in any way is totally welcome), whether its weird family stuff, crack fic, the cult stuff. like im pretty open on this one

specific prompts:

cult backstory, give me that hidden cult ending. give me them joining the cult together when they were young. give me them scheming together or scheming separately. or give me mary realizing she’s married a gay demon only after the fact and its too late to get out. like honestly give me anything cult

the mystery of crish? i can’t believe he’s in the character list and now i want someone to explain why we’ve never met him? does he really exist? this can (and probably should be total crack)

remember how i mentioned robert was an option, feel free to mix in his connections with the family, the affair that clearly happened. being part of their cult. mary just bonding with her best friend and being drunk together? joseph fucking robert while mary is aware of what is going on. how they even became friends with all that happened?

honestly, there’s just so much not explained about the christiansen family, so anything about them is 100% up my alley. 

Galavant (TV)

requested characters:  madalena (galavant), gareth (galavant)

where to find: both season are on netflix!

so im biased because i was convinced to watch this show because of my mallory jansen, so madalena is of course my favorite character. and then this ship hit me out of nowhere, so now here i am

im either looking for madalena centric fic, or shippy fic with the both of them

specific prompts:

the end of s2 left so many openings that weren’t explored because we never got a s3 but give me madalena learning to do the d’dew, and getting to finally be the evil queen that she deserves wow

also feel free to give me that shippy stuff with gareth going to save her, and then realizing how much they love each other (as they should have wow)

alternatively a fix-it for the finale where madalena chooses gareth over the d’dew and they figure out where they can go from there. rebuild that trust, just be happy together though still sorting things out because now they do’t have a kingdom

smut? this ship is built for smut? madalena literally has a body built for sin, give me that sin

alternatively, give me fluffy, them finally getting to be “happy” together, madalena learning to have emotions and to love

also for non shippy plot any future fic for madalena or character study set during season 2/post season 2 would be the dream

Legion (TV)

requested characters:  cary loudermilk, kerry loudermilk

where to find: honestly i have no clue? fx? pirating sites? i watched this one live when it was airing. 

this show hit me with so much backstory and explanation not given and like that’s the aesthetic of the show, but i was specifically drawn to these two and their unique set of powers and i just ?? need more??

while i’m mostly into gen for these two, if you want to do weird stuff, like, i’m curious and not opposed (does it count as incest if they’re technically the same person?)

specific prompts:

BACKSTORY, any thing with their backstory, build on what canon told us and give me more, like what is it like for cary to keep aging on while kerry stays younger, what are the limits of their powers, how much can they feel

that hurt comfort after the stuff that happened towards the end of the season, like these two need to bond and recover after all the trauma 

5 times they were overly protective of each other

just man their dynamic is so weird and i need that to be explored, feel free to ship them with any of the other characters or ?? with each other if youre into that?? just like give me more of these two

actually, does it count as incest if their the same person is now a prompt, like maybe someone asks that? idk man just discuss

Powerless (TV 2017)

requested characters:  beatriz da costa | green fury (powerless), emily locke

where to find: this is another i have no clue situation im sorry

this show got canceled because it was like bad dc sitcom airing the same night as arrow but before it did it gave me this hint of femslash potential and tbh this is why im most offended that it was canceled

specific prompts: 

so if the show had lasted longer i am convinced that beatriz and emily would have been gay together, so give these ladies the show they deserved and tell the story of them falling in love

the news already thinks their dating so what about super villains, how many times does emily get kidnapped for being the green fury’s girlfriend before they actually art (or before she realizes she actually is)

how does dating a superhero effect her work life

also just emily loves superheroes, so she’s probably so pumped to be dating one like “wow babe can you believe im dating a superhero” and beatriz like “we were just making out obviously youre dating a superhero”

give me cute gay girls honestly 

Star Trek: Discovery

requested characters:  michael burnham (star trek: discovery), saru (star trek: discovery)

where to find: cbs all access! its ongoing, as i write this letter on its second episode!

okay since this show is ongoing these prompts might get joss’d but it’s too late to go back because two episodes in got me interested in the dynamic between these two

this can be gen (and feature other ships if you want) or can be shippy for these two. im pretty open since this show is so new. 

specific prompts: 

so they were together on the shenzhou for 7 years according to canon so lets get some back story between these two, how did they get to where they were. was there rivalry between the two of them from the very beginning? how does saru feel about someone who has never been to the academy out ranking him? bridge disagreement shenanigans? their captain locking them in a room until their sort out their issues

like, do you want to write alien sex? because a part of me wants to receive alien sex so like? this is an option?

what about them now both on the discovery together, that distrust because of what happen on the shenzhou? building up into something  new? better than before? building into feeling that may have been hidden all along?

on the discovery, forced to work together to save the team and putting their issues asside for the good of everyone else

honestly i just feel like they were supposed to be the spock/bones dynamic of the shenzhou before things went bad and like ??? i want that ?? 

Young & Hungry

requested characters:  caroline huntington 

where to find: it’s all on netflix (though caroline only appears in season one)

yet another show i watched because of mallory jansen, and her character is only in the first season and really all i cared about on this show so guess who i want backstory for

specific prompts:

caroline character study? i mean, she’s written as the rich bitch girlfriend rival in the show but let’s just say she deserves better, flush her out and give her life for me

she definitely deserves better than josh, and i like femslash so pair her with one of the girls in the tag set if you want

just more on her and the horse from young & pregnant this is mostly crack but like also

consider for a second that instead of the plot being gabi sleeps with josh on the first day and starts all of the show drama. what if instead she sleeps with caroline, and we get the aftermath of “oh hey i slept with my new boss’s finace, this isnt awkward at all” rewrite of season 1 with 95% more femslash 

just give me more caroline

ANYWAYS, I HOPE YOU ENJOYED MY LETTER AND I’LL LOVE WHATEVER YOU DECIDE TO WRITE ME!

[nerdyskeleton]

ALL of the author asks

all right, you anonymous rogue, let’s do this. under the read more for length. I’m answering this instead of doing my accounting homework mua ha ha. But thanks in advance for asking for these it made me feel really nice and it was so fun!!!

1) is there a story you’re holding off on writing for some reason?

Ah I mean not really? I have a bunch of ideas bouncing around, but I don’t have the time or the energy to sit down and start another multichap really. Still recovering from the last one haha. Plus I need to have the main story planned out before I start writing, as well as most of the big details, so I don’t want to start something without knowing where I want to ehh vaguely end up.

2) what work of yours, if any, are you the most embarrassed about existing?

oh my god. Everything that’s on ff.net. I wrote SUCH garbage from like 13-16(?) it’s just all such a disaster. But there’s quite a few multichaps there that are complete so I’m proud of little me completing those haha. But it’s all SO cringe-worthy.

3) what order do you write in? front of book to back? chronological? favorite scenes first? something else?

(lol “““““book”““““) I do write from beginning to end! Sometimes if there’s a scene I suddenly have a really good idea for I will sit down and get most of it out, or at least jot down some notes for what I want to happen. But I try to write in the order of the story so that I can update consistently! And I try really hard to write ahead, like I didn’t start posting School Daze until I had a few chapters as back up, so I could work on the future ones as I updated weekly, like a bad ass.

4) favorite character you’ve written

I LOVE writing Trucy. She’s one of my favorite characters in the whole AA series - she’s just so fun and lovely. Plus it’s fine to like write a regular person instead of prissy ass Edgeworth or Blackquill.

5) character you were most surprised to end up writing

I mean I personally never expected to go as hard with Blackmadhi as I did and in such a short time span either!! I’ve written 80k of Blackmadhi in 2 months like girl can you cool it for a minute? Also I didn’t like Blackquill AT ALL while playing DD so the fact that I’m such a thirsty bitch for him is surprising to me. Here we are though.

6) something you would go back and change in your writing that it’s too late/complicated to change now

7) when asked, are you embarrassed or enthusiastic to tell people that you write?

tbh I don’t tell anyone really! Well, not people who are already confirmed dorks like me. Mostly because I don’t want to get into the “oh what do you write?” conversation hahaha. “uh…..gay lawyer fanfic?”

8) favorite genre to write

Hmm…….I mean I’ll go for angst and hurt/comfort all day long, because there’s nothing more satisfying to me when I do something terrible to the characters, everyone gets mad at me for it, and then I fix it later on with a happy little scene of pure love and compassion between the characters.

9) what, if anything, do you do for inspiration?

Hm. I’ll normally put on some Disney music, because that has been my go-to inspiring music for a very long time. Sometimes I’ll go back and reread some parts of whatever I have written recently to be like “Look! You actually like this part! Write more so you can keep feeling this way!” Or I’ll read the last bits of the last update to remember where I was even going with the plot line LMAO

10) write in silence or with background noise? with people or alone?

I like to write with music! It has to be very specific music though. Being with people who are also writing/being productive helps, so then I feel obligated to get stuff done too haha.

11) what aspect of your writing do you think has most improved since you started writing?

??? man I have no clue. I guess I’m pretty good with like……not sweating the little stuff. If I feel like I don’t have much sentence variation in one paragraph, I leave it, because it’s okay. Not everything has to be poetic (literally NOTHING I write is poetic). I feel like I make up for it later on with a paragraph with better flow. I hope. Idk these things, friends.

12) your weaknesses as an author

I guess like……descriptions?? Both like physical background descriptions like where they are, because I feel like knowing the scenery can be pretty important. but also like facial and behavioral descriptions too? Like sometimes I’m too lazy to find the exact word I want so I just pick a generic one and move on. I love getting things done, so sometimes the quality isn’t what it could be because I just like finishing things hahaha.

13) your strengths as an author

I’m pretty good with writing things out the way I want them the first time, because if I’m going to write I want it to be right (hehe). Obviously I go back and edit things to tweak it, but if I’m sitting down to write something, I don’t want to half-ass it and come back to it later. I HATE finally finishing some huge ass 12k chapter and then remembering I left a scene unfinished because then that means I’m NOT DONE AHHH.

14) do you make playlists for your current wips?

Not really! Mostly because I can never just like listen to whatever music I want. I listened to Hozier for a month straight as I finished up School Daze because for some reason that smooth hipster really did it for me.

15) why did you start writing?

Who knows man!! But it’s fun!! I got super into a book series called Skulduggery Pleasant like it was my first HARDCORE FANDOM that I wrote for. My ff.net is under the same name if anyone wants so suffer through it. Let me know if you do because it’s all disgusting and I want to laugh about it. But ALSO it’s all really problematic so please don’t judge 13 year old me okay thanks.

16) are there any characters who haunt you?

LMAO WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THIS.

17) if you could give your fledgling author self any advice, what would it be?

oh man…..keep on sticking with it man. I’m glad you are writing (even if present me thinks it’s god awful) because you made so many friends and really learned a lot, actually. Good on you for doing what you want to do. Maybe also stop thinking of yourself as the greatest fanfic writer of all time I mean just maybe, girl.

18) were there any works you read that affected you so much that it influenced your writing style? what were they?

Yeah, Skulduggery Pleasant again! The author, Derek Landy, writes so sarcastically and I guess kind of simple (not like bad simple haha). I would just crack up every few minutes reading the series so I wanted to be that funny author with clever little deadpan lines like him. idk if I succeeded haha.

19) when it comes to more complicated narratives, how do you keep track of outlines, characters, development, timeline, ect.?

I have a separate document where everything is planned out. Well, not everything, but the majority of stuff. For School Daze, I always wanted to have the next two chapters planned out from where I was currently. I just always gotta know where I’m headed so I don’t get anything mixed up or forget anything.

20) do you write in long sit-down sessions or in little spurts?

It depends! Both usually just depending on the time. I write for a looong time on weekends like a loser with nothing else to do, but if I have like twenty minutes to kill between stuff I’ll think up some lines or finish planning out a scene.

21) what do you think when you read over your older work?

I literally cannot stop laughing at it. I guess it’s not BAD like my grammar was always good and I tried really hard but just like…….I know I thought I was the fanfic SHIT back then so I’m just like “Laura like how could you ever let other people see this???? it makes no sense!!!!!!”

22) are there any subjects that make you uncomfortable to write?

I guess kind of the usual suspects…..No non-con, incest, underage stuff. I don’t write it, so I’m never uncomfortable with it!

23) any obscure life experiences that you feel have helped your writing?

Hmm not really?? Not too obscure, but I took a looong break from writing mostly because I fell out of that Skulduggery Pleasant fandom and I got super depressed in high school. So now that I’m way better, I really enjoy writing again because I remembered the old feelings of being SO happy when I got a review on ff.net. Makes me feel 13 again, which is actually pretty regrettable.

24) have you ever become an expert on something you previously knew nothing about, in order to better a scene or a story?

Ah not really! I don’t write too much stuff that needs expertise (and also tbh I haven’t written that much like idk what I’m doing here) but also I’m just a lazy shit and will look up the minimum required information for what I need to get done hahaha.

25) copy/paste a few sentences or a short paragraph that you’re particularly proud of“Meaning, Miles concluded, that she expressed a very high level of care and compassion for nearly everything in her life. Soon, her thousands of questions in class made sense, because she just wanted to understand the information to the highest degree. And now that Miles was witnessing nearly a private glimpse into the art teacher’s collage project, he saw the same level of attention that Trucy bestowed on her own projects in Phoenix, as well.With this knowledge, Miles assumed, logically, that Phoenix had been the one to impart this trait into her. And from their date, he now knew the man had taken her in unexpectedly and still managed to raise her right.Phoenix Wright was clearly not only an amazing father and art teacher, but also a wonderfully kind, considerate, and determined individual. How could Miles not be drawn physically and mentally to the man?” I really liked this paragraph, because this was a part of the first time that I had written as Miles Edgeworth and had taken a very long chunk of time to go into some gay-ass introspection. Thought it turned out pretty well???