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hauntedhokage · 22 days ago

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Day 16: Lingerie

word count: 3k

warnings: unprotected sex, light bondage,

notes: please offer your condolences to the discord server today, since I have not stopped talking about this man for at least two days (and will not, either). happy ???th birthday to my beloved

“I can’t wait to crawl into bed,” Xavier mumbles as he carries you into his apartment, carefully setting down your heels that he’d been carrying while kicking the door shut behind him. “You keep me very busy.”

“But you liked it.” Due to your position on his back, you can’t clearly see his face but you know that he’s smiling as he gives his head a slight shake while making his way towards the bedroom. “Actually, you loved it. I heard you say that at dinner when you thought I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Actually, I said that I loved you, but I did also enjoy dinner and dancing. Any time with you is time best spent.” He's carefully dropping you onto the bed, smiling as you bounced on the mattress with a giggle only to look confused when you quickly rolled off the bed to stand on the feet that had been killing you just twenty minutes ago.

“Where did this energy come from?”

“Gotta get your surprise that I mentioned earlier,” you remind, pulling him in by his blazer to steal a kiss. “Get comfy, babe, I’ll be right back.”

“We can always do this tomorrow?”

“Let me get it out, and you can decide if you want to open it tonight or tomorrow.”

The night was still young despite how tired Xavier already was, but you know that he wasn’t going to let a gift from you go unappreciated. It had taken days to find just the right thing, and if he didn’t want to fully appreciate it tonight it’d be there in the morning. Or more likely the afternoon since he routinely slept until after lunchtime and well into dinnertime.

“I like that plan.” And he’s dropping himself onto the bed, working on taking his shoes as you make your way to the bathroom. “You hid it in my bathroom?”

“Couldn’t risk you finding it!” You call back, managing to undo the clasp at the back of your neck and work at the zipper of your dress without needing his help. He’d be a bit bummed that he couldn’t help, but that would spoil the surprise if he had helped considering that your dress was perfect to hide the lacy number while you were out at dinner with your beloved. It’d been right in front of him all evening and he hadn’t noticed even with how his hands traveled during dinner and the time spent dancing together.

You adjust your hair first, mentally reassuring yourself that he was going to love it, then smooth your hands over the lacy white bodysuit. The red satin ribbon is tied around your waist with the best bow you can tie while keeping it easy to undo, then you turn to exit the bathroom.

“You took a minute to just grab something, was it in the- oh.”

“I’m the last gift,” you inform with a smile, leaning in the doorway to the bathroom as he stands from the bed.

The way he moves towards you is slow, eyes trained on your body as if he was a predator stalking its prey - slow and steady to lull you into security before he pounced. He hadn’t fully undressed, still wearing his dress shirt that was mostly unbuttoned and his unzipped slacks, but Xavier was quite the delicious sight when he was disheveled - lulling you into that safe distraction as he closed in. Hands clasp the doorframe, his taller figure looming over you as his lips press to your forehead.

“You are so good to me, my gorgeous constellation.”

“Happy birthday Xavier.” Is all you can whisper before he’s kissing you, hands moving to your hips to hoist you up. Your legs close around his waist as your back hits the doorframe, a small gasp escaping your lips into his greedy mouth at the force of the collision.

“Do I get to unwrap you?” He murmurs against your lips, smiling when you nod before his lips travel to your neck as he brings you off the wall to get you onto the bed.

This time your back hits the bed gently, Xavier laying you down as if you were a glass figurine before his hands travel up your sides to your breasts. “You did this for me, truly a gift.”

“There’s another surprise.” You gently grab his wrist, guiding his left hand away from your breast to the apex of your thighs where his fingers find an opening in the lacy fabric. His eyes darkened with lust, the hand still on your breast toying with your nipple through the place as his finger parts your already slick folds and sighing in content when you take his finger easily to the hilt.

“Fuck, you’re already wet. Someone clearly likes dressing up for me.”

The second finger joins the first, thumb finally finding your clit after an evening of teasing you through your panties while barely missing the slit that would’ve given him the skin-to-skin contact that would’ve likely had you making a scene in the restaurant. But the wait and teasing was worth it when those fingers curl into the spot that has you arching into his hand as he grins at your obvious need. He’s praising you as his fingers push you to that peak, now with three fingers working your pussy open to be able to comfortably accommodate the length you’d be taking in just a few minutes.

“Xavi,” you whine when he presses down on your clit, clenching around his fingers as he rolls his thumb in a circle. “Wanna su-“

“I know, and you’ll get to. Cum for me first, and then you can do whatever you want to.”

It’s almost too much when he leans in to lick at your breast through the lace, pushing the fabric against your nipple as his tongue comes out to drag up the fabric until he reaches the skin left uncovered by the deep v-neck. His mouth was just as dangerous as his fingers, the additional stimulation provided by the kisses and gentle nips along your neck and jawline having your walls pulsating around his diligent digits leaving no part of you that was in reach untouched by his eager hand.

“C’mon, honey, let go for me,” he whispers in your ear, voice heavy with his lust. “Let me see how my constellation sparkles when I’ve got you cumming on my fingers.”

Your body couldn’t deny him that satisfaction when he made his requests like that. A shaky hand rises to cup the back of his head, fingers curling into the soft blonde locks to keep him close as you whine his name while the first waves of orgasm crash over you like a high tide against the coastline.

“X-Xavier, please please-“

“Gonna ride it out with you, love it when you say my name like that.”

Your lower back relaxes a bit as you come down from that high, Xavier’s fingers slowing their pace gradually until he was ready to pull them out. The way he sits up and indulges in your taste has to be sinful, his eyes closing as he takes two of his fingers into his mouth and groans - the sound coming from deep in his throat and sending a shiver down your spine. You think he’s saving his index finger for you, but instead that receives its own cleaning in his mouth as he returns his gaze to yours.

“I just can’t get over how pretty you are,” he whispers, hand palming at the tent in his trousers as the other returns to your breast. “You can suck me off in the morning, honey. I just wanna be inside you, if that’s okay?”

“It’s your birthday, Xavier. I’m okay with whatever you want to do.”

You don’t think you’ve seen pants and boxers come off his body faster than they did in this moment, his belt buckle knocking against whatever wall he’d tossed them making a thud that sounded so distant from where you were at despite only being just a few feet away. The way Xavier looks at you makes everything feel like it’s so far away - that it’s just the two of you on your own little planet so far removed from the rest of the world. Isolated yet still so connected, as he’d never truly let his guard down when he was alone.

A whispered “c’mere” leaves him as he brings you onto his lap, his erection between you already hard and weeping pre that your hand gently begins to spread around his most sensitive skin. His pleasured whine is muffled by your mouth, the kiss he’d pulled you into desperate and needy while his hands grip your barely clothed hips tightly.

“Gonna ride me?” The mumble against your lips is barely comprehensible, but you know him well enough to know just what he was asking for and to have already planned for it.

“I was hoping to,” you confirm, smiling when he lies back on the mattress with his head comfortably cradled by his pillows. “But first, I think you need to unwrap me.”

Your fingers tug at the bow still tied around your waist, and once he does the fabric is tied in a slip knot around his wrists to keep his hands out of the action.

“Baby~”

“You might get them back if you’re good.” There’s another pathetic wine as you tie the other end of the satin around one of the bars on your headboard to keep those hands out of your way. “You can’t use your evol, either.”

It’s clearly torture for you to be be sinking onto his cock without his hands controlling your descent. He made it seem like he was losing something important with the way he pouts, looking directly at you with big bunny eyes that have pupils blown so wide you can hardly see the ocean that were his irises. It usually worked to get him what he wanted, you couldn’t resist that face when he flashed it at him - “usually” being the key word.

This time, however, you have the resolve to deny him as your hands settle on his thighs for stability as you roll your hips along his length. He's so pretty beneath you with his lips curved downwards into a pout you saw relatively often, but this one was also mixed with the irritation you were also used to when he didn’t get his way. But he could wait and have his way with you tomorrow, tonight he shouldn’t have to put in the work for it like he usually did - despite how eager he always was to keep your body teetering just on the edge of orgasm, sometimes all night which had him sleeping at the sunrise and staying asleep through the next day.

“Let me treat you, Xavi. Please?” You have your own pout as you lean forward, hands planted on his chest as you continue to ride him. “Tomorrow you call the shots, yeah?”

“You’re torturing me, honey. But you feel so good when you ride me, you feel good too?”

“So good,” you murmur, teasing one of his nipples as you lean in to get a kiss from the birthday boy.

His kiss is hungry, desperate for more of you and tasting of the wine you’d had at the restaurant. Chardonnay tastes much better when it was on his lips, and you’re sure you could get drunk off of his kisses when he was kissing you like this. His hips try to match your pace, his movements uncoordinated because he didn’t have the hands to move you the way he wanted to which pulls a frustrated grunt from him as you pull back.

“Baby.”

“Patience, Xavier.”

“Can you move a little faster please?” He’s whispering now, meeting your gaze though you know he wants to look away. For how desperate he was for control tonight, asking for things in bed has never been a point of comfort for him, a shyness pulled out of him when he has to advocate for himself. “I like when you’re a bit rough with it, y’know.”

That was true, your hand that had come to cup his cheek sliding back to get a fistful of his hair to tug his head back as you met his request to bounce your hips against him faster, harder, the sound of skin on skin reverberating around the bedroom while he lets out pleasures whines beneath you. You’re also moaning, his name and the various pet names he’d collected over the course of your relationship spilling from your mouth as he finally found the rhythm he was looking for to meet yours. He was deep, his cock pushing into the depths of your pussy that his fingers couldn’t reach that had you seeing stars while you looked down at your own star that was being so good as he let you ride him.

“Baby I’m so close, can I please touch you?”

You shut him down with a shake of your head, and he’s definitely more frustrated that you’ve denied him again. But you were about to cum, your hips chasing that peak as your nails dig into the plush skin of his chest, harder when you feel that familiar warmth grow into the flames that were only extinguished by your hand moving between your bodies to give yourself that little push that has you stilling on his length as you tighten around him while trying to ride it out.

His hands come to rest on your sides, telling you how good you felt on him and how beautiful you look when you’re cumming for him. Your brain doesn’t register that he’s freed himself until you feel his hand in your hair to pull your head back, a smirk decorating his face as he relishes in his victory.

“Xavier, what-?”

“My turn.” His voice is deep, the need as he was likely close to his own end sending a shiver down his spine as he sat upright to get you to a mutual eye level. “Enjoy yourself?”

All you had for a response was a nod, your arms draping over his neck as he tipped you back onto the bed so he could hover over you. You supposed your knot was just too loose to keep such an accomplished Hunter restrained, but you couldn’t think too deeply about it as Xavier is holding you close so you’re chest-to-chest while his hips fuck into your still pulsing cunt in a mating press that had him thrusting deeper into you then he had been when you were on top.

“Please, baby, please can I cum inside?” He didn’t beg often, but you’re too busy whining into his neck to be able to really tease him for it like you had been earlier. He was too busy rearranging your guts to truly register anything you were saying that wasn’t his name. “Wanna fill you- fuck- I need to fill you. You’ll let me right, pretty girl?”

You nod into his neck before leaving a kiss there, close to teetering off the edge into a third orgasm for the night. His name leaves your lips in a mantra as that coil in your gut snaps, the syllables rolling off your tongue and tickling his neck with every brush of your lips against his skin that has him holding you to his chest in a vice grip as his hips stutter and you feel the new warmth deep in your core as he cums. He continues to fuck his cum into you until he’s spent, carefully pulling out his cock while trying to be mindful of how sensitive you likely were while keeping you close to his chest as you both caught your breath.

“You’re incredible.” Is all he says as he lets you roll to lie next to him, his hand finding yours to bring to his lips and leave a slow trail of kisses against your palm and to your wrist. You lie there for a few minutes, taking turns moving your joined hands between you to kiss the other’s hand until he finally sits up. “Let’s get cleaned up. Can we shower tomorrow?”

You only nod as you work yourself out of the bodysuit, tossing it in the same general direction that Xavier had thrown his pants before getting comfortable in the bed with your back to the bathroom. When Xavier returns you feel the mattress dip, then a hand carefully adjusting your leg so he had access to your cunt that was getting messier as his cum leaks from your slit.

“I know you’re sensitive but please cooperate.” You nod into your pillow at his request, but your hips still jerk at the first graze of the washcloth against your labia and spread them to clean around your entrance.

When he finishes, the washcloth meets the same fate as your lingerie and his clothes - tossed against a wall to be dealt with in the morning - before he’s sliding into bed behind you and pulling you back into him. The warmth of his chest against your back once he’s settled in bed is always comforting, but after having sex like that the comfort and security was amplified with how tight he held you while murmuring the sleepy sweet nothings mixed with kisses to the skin he could easily access that made you melt in his arms.

“It’s bedtime,” he whispers, fingers tracing patterns against your forearms as you hum your agreement. “We wore each other out, sleepy girl.”

“Yeah,” you mumble into your pillow, smiling when he softly echoes you. “Thank you for indulging me and celebrating your birthday.”

“You’ll wear it again, right?” You barely hear the question that’s mumbled into your shoulder, and you look over your shoulder to see him with half lidded eyes - clearly fighting sleep to spend these extra few minutes with you. “Look so good in it. Like the moon, but just mine to admire.”

“Of course, baby. Maybe next time pull out the bunny ears?” There’s a groan into your skin followed by an open mouthed kiss, Xavier’s eyes closing as he likely pictured the image of you dressed like that. But they don’t open, he just smiles as you resettle into the mattress.

“With knee high socks and a garter?”

“Our anniversary is in a few weeks, I’m sure that all can be arranged.”

“I love you. Thank you for an unforgettable day.”

“Love you, too, Xavier. Happy birthday."

#hh. kt 2024 #kinktober 2024 #xavier l&ds #xavier x reader #xavier x mc #xavier x you #tags for this game are UNREAL

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bones-of-a-rabbit · 1 year ago

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the abandonment issues au,,

where Sun and Moon gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss their way into ur heart

and then turn into sad wet baby kittens when u find out and call them out on it <3

(copy and pasted from the space aces discord, sorry fellas lmao)

abandonment issues au:

ok what if. fucked up au time

where. reader is the new daycare assistant or a mechanic or smthn idk theyre working withh Sun and Moon thats the important part

i think it works better if theyre like, Sun n Moon's handler? Bc they r closer that way and it makes it more fucked up lmaooooo

so basically. this takes place right after Sun n Moon had their best friend-handler person leave bc Sun n Moon had been acting increasingly volatile n buggy n rlly just having issues but the more the previous handler tried to talk to them abt it and fix it the more they got anxious abt getting decommissioned and would cover up the problems n act like nothing was wrong

and eventually one day the previous handler nearly got rlly hurt and knew they had to leave bc it wasn't safe for them and they left a detailed warning/report for the mechanics

(and they didnt say goodbye, not out of malice or anything just bc they didnt want even more reasons for Sun n Moon to act up/potentially hurt them or themselves)

so. the mechanics did a total clean up of Sun n Moon's system, basically left their memories but scrubbed their data of a lot of the 'feelings' they'd had- mostly wiping away the feelings tied to 'good' memories, and the only thing Sun n Moon could do to fill in the void of 'feelings' was assign different feelings in their place, so when they once looked back and felt happy or nostalgic, now they feel confused and angry and sad and betrayed bc why was all of that happiness taken from them?? why did their handler hurt them like this??

so the scrubbing of their systems, which was one thing they really really didn't want to have done for fear of losing their memories entirely, DID work in putting their issues on a much lower level,, but it didn't get rid of the issues entirely. Now they're just,, easier to hide or play off or ignore. They're careful around the kids, of course, but they do at times have trouble with their motor controls or their speech will glitch slightly, etc

a few handlers come and go, never staying for more than a week or so- none of them really care about the job, don't see Sun n Moon as coworkers but more like fancy 'machines' with no real thoughts or emotions, they normally leave after Sun or Moon has a glitchy moment and nearly hurts them or, in at least one case, does hurt them by squeezing their wrist too hard. more often than not, the ppl applying for the position read the list of warnings n cautions and are like 'hell nahh' and bail immediately

then. in comes,, reader. local dumbass. most endearing of idiots. a bit dense. very much clueless. dearly beloved

you're the first one to really treat them like your coworkers, making small talk and being friendly and kind and patient and laughing at their jokes. you smile when you introduce yourself, offering your hand for them to shake- not afraid of them or their little twitches at all. god, how they missed that. you remind them of their previous handler, if only in how you see them like theyre people and not machines.

and they make a mutual agreement to do whatever they can to keep you as their handler. even if it means dodging around company rules and policies by doing something like crumpling up the confidential 'warning' forms, ortelling the occasional white lie, like forging your signature onto the papers when your back is turned and making sure it makes it to your manager without either of you noticing who exactly was putting it on their desk.

you've already started calling them your friends the first time they have a glitchy moment. you're doing detailing work on their endoskeleton, really just cleaning dust away and making sure everything looks the way it does in the manual, when they break something- a tablet, a pen, your phone, whatever it is, it happens in an instant and startles you.

when Sun n Moon come to and realize whats happened theyre terrified. what if you use this as some kind of excuse to leave? What if you abandon them, just like their previous handler did? What if you start treating them differently, or you tell the staff that they need to be scrapped

so when you ask what that was about, they're frantic, quick to come up with something, anything that might make you shrug and forget all about it,

"Well, you WERE just working on their insides, right? That must have been something YOU did to suddenly make us do something like THAT! There's no way else it could have happened. Right?"

You take the lie hook, line, and sinker, apologizing profusely, promising to try harder to make sure nothing like that happens again. The relief they feel is almost euphoric. They pat you on the head kindly, reassuring you that they know you didn't do it on purpose, it was just a little mess up! You're fine, friend, we forgive you.

From then on, they dodge blame and truth alike, most often redirecting your attention to something you must have said or done to make something so strange and out of character for them happen so suddenly, and you believe them, full of apologies and careful words and actions and nervous worrying about doing things wrong and hurting them somehow. It's cute, how anxious you can get. It's cuter, how you melt for their comfort and reassurance.

They play the song and dance with you again and again, weaving doubt and guilt into you more and more frequently. Until one day, you mumble something about how 'maybe i'm not cut out for this, maybe i should switch to be on the janitorial team instead, or some other department, i don't want to hurt you guys, or-or be the reason someone else gets hurt, i clearly dont know what im doing, and it's only gotten worse, maybe i should talk to my manager,,' and they panic

don't be silly, friend!!!! you can't just leave like that, what about the kids, what about that puppet show you had helped them plan, did you really want to just abandon all that?? so what if maybe they had the occasional hiccup, you were always there to smooth it over, who cared whether they dropped things from time to time, or- or broke a toy or two, that didn't matter, did it??? You were getting so good at being their handler, your little mistakes were normal, come on, you don't want to leave your very best friends. Do you?

and you cave, agreeing to stay, and they are so, so extremely careful to hide their little moments from you for several weeks, making sure you don't notice their tiny twitches or split seconds of glitchy voices, maybe keeping a closer eye on you than would be comfortable, watching over your shoulder each time you type up a report about the day, giving the manager a loathsome glower behind your back whenever they happen by,, and every time you leave you say 'i'll see you guys tomorrow!,' they grab onto your sleeve and respond with 'promise?' so you always know that they really, really do want you to come back

and then. one day,, you decide to go looking in their files for something small and silly, like what kinds of updates had been added to their pick-up protocols, and you find the warnings and cautions forms

and you see your signature on them, but you would definitely remember this and you are absolutely certain you have never seen these papers in your life. and you take the papers and you go to ask them about it.

"i thought you said you never had any problems before? you told me you never had any issues before but this- this is full of things that you- and you, you've been having these problems for that long??"

they stumble over their words, frantic, panicked, backpedaling on everything theyve ever said, trying meekly to grab the papers from your hands, piling excuses on excuses

"you knew? you knew you were having these problems, and you didn't tell me? and you- you told me it was my fault!"

you're close to tears, hurt that they lied more than anything. you keep backing away from them, dodging their attempts to get the forms. they don't know which is worse- seeing that look on your face, or when they were left without so much as a goodbye.

"you could have told me. i thought i was the reason for everything, i thought i was hurting you, and you just... you lied right to my face and let me think that."

theyre putting on their best soothing voice, movements slow and gentle, wanting to comfort you and wipe those tears away and reassure you somehow that this- this isn't their fault, none of it is, it never was, they're fine and you're fine and nothing was ever wrong, and everything will be fine if only you calm down and stay

you can tell they arent really listening. you take a deep breath and turn away from them, scraping the tears from your face. you tell them you're going to go home and write up a report about all of this and when you come back you can go over it together before you send it to management, but right now you're leaving because you need space to breathe and time to think

but all they hear is that you're leaving, and they panic.

they don't hurt you, of course! but right now you're not allowed to leave.

you try to shut out the sound of them crying and apologizing and begging, even if it breaks your heart, because right now all you want to do is go home and lie in your stupid bed and have a stupid cry in your favorite pajamas. but you try every door you can think of- none of them open. you've sstayed past closing more than once, but the doors aren't normally shuttered for another two hours,, and you're pretty sure the night guard isn't even here yet

the entire time you're walking around the 'plex, Moon is trailing sadly behind you, waiting with the saddest, most pathetic wet cat look an animatronic can achieve, for you to turn and face them again

and thus begins what is probably the longest night of your life, spent trying to avoid your animatronic friends/coworkers who are acting like the worlds clingiest ex who just got broken up with and who can't stop dropping sad love songs in ur dms

by the time morning rolls around, they agree to actually go to parts n services and cooperate and try their best to get whatever is wrong with them repaired, even if it means they might get decomissioned. in the mean time, you promise to come back once they're fixed and work with them to help them get back to their old selves- or at least, back to how they were before any potentially dangerous bugs

basically this is the 'sun and moon have abandonment issues and gaslight you abt it' au

idk what else would happen tbh idk why i thought this au needed to exist either but here we are *lays facedown in a puddle*

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fluidstatick · 5 months ago

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I dunno, man. (game changer finale talk under the cut)

I love the chemistry of Brennan, Jess, Grant, Ally, Rekha, Katie, and Zac. An excellent spread of comedy styles, and they're all tight enough friends that they can strategize with (and against) each other easily. Ally, hiding behind Brennan, who is hiding behind Rekha, just in a different context -- Truly only this crew could pull off something like that. The Landlord and Granma Sweetie are such perfect distillations of Jess and Zac's energy.

Names aside, I thought Jack and Jackson were too similar. Katie and Grant were both trying to be the straight (lol) man in the building, and for me, that meant they cancelled each other out.

Adjustable Side Table Walnut was absolutely robbed. Rekha had pitch perfect banter with everyone (except Steven), did an excellent job figuring everyone else out, and didn't give any hints until it was time to boot Brennan. She absolutely should have won, on merit of playing the game thoroughly and hilariously.

As for the ratfish? Well.

Listen, I never watched Adult Swim. I only know Tim and Eric by name. I've never watched anything they've done. It was only last monday when I learned that this guy is Tim:

And this guy is Eric:

I literally thought that he was some sort of amateur astrophysics youtuber (?) and that gif was from some video he made about quantum mechanics, or string theory or something. I blame the turtleneck.

Anyway, I digress. Just from watching this, I don't find Eric Wareheim funny. According to a few posts I've seen in the dropout tags, though, his brand is mostly awkward anti-comedy anyway? Nothing wrong with that, it's just not my speed. It felt strange to go ive him so much power over the game. Sam was probably going for an impartial judge, someone who doesn't know the cast personally and can decide who their favorite is without the cast members themselves influencing their decision. That being said, there are so many different people Sam could've gone with. I still think it shoulda been Sam Reigel, cosplaying as Sam Reich. "Look at me. I'm the Sam now! I've been present for the duration!" Could've been any number of LA based comedians, really.

Eric's choices felt completely left field. Ally started strong with their BLeeM gambit, sure, but I really think Adjustable Side Table Walnut deserved more shine. Katie winning solely for the art piece felt anticlimactic, especially because the painting felt like a Katie piece, not a Jack Stryker piece.

The cast not getting to meet Eric felt unfair, too, unless for some reason he had to leave before the final table was assembled and shot.

The cackle at the end didn't feel like a cliffhanger so much as a taunt. We get it, Samuel Dalton, you're still out here wrecking shop and our frantic theorizing on discord and reddit is all for naught.

anyway tl;dr - Ratfish 🫤. Justice For Side Table Walnut! MeDeCine.

#dropout #game changer #ratfish

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 year ago

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wibta if i asked for help from the ppl who i harassed for months?

ok so basically i (18f, at the time 16f) really like this group. but one day they just went on "indefinite hiatus" for no reason. and obviously i was really mad. so after a few months of trying to pick the right person to blame i decided it was entirely thr fault of this one asshole, who literally went and made his OWN GROUP like right after this hiatus was announced. the little turd clearly wanted out due to hating his members. and that's not even the worst part. he actually started gaining traction after this dumb little move. and after the turd made a collab with a pretty popular kpop group (and we all know how kpop stans are with their mass streaming) this loser was getting more attention than thr guy that I LIKE.

my guy was the most talented pretty and popular member of the group when it was active, and he could sell out dome tours with his solo work all the time. he just did that in fact. but now that this other bitch was using kpop stans for clout he was the one getting all the attention. and it rubbed off on his group he made and their trash music as well. but this isn't about him it's about me.

like i said i got really upset, and once i decided this was all turd boy's fault, i shamelessly harassed fans of this "person" and the dumb little group he made, mostly by way of spamming gore in their discord servers and wikis. this lasted for months until one of them eventually doxxed me back. i'll admit i shouldn't have done all of this. but i was just fighting against traitors in the industry.

but, it's been over a year since then. and i've moved on. until a few weeks ago. this third guy "came out" in a clear pr stunt. like with a whole press confrence and everything he didnt even try to hide it. and then he dropped a new song right after. somebody's jealous of the sold out dome tour!

but not everyone realises its a pr stunt. ppl are falling for it and streaming the new somg. and if the hype doesn't die down soon my guy will be in THIRD. i can't let that happen or else i'd be a failure but i have a plan.

hypothetically, i would slide back into the discord server, explain my dilemma, and maybe stans of the first turd would be willing to mass stream my guy's amazing new song and i guess i'll mass stream whatever crap their guy shat out recently. they're smart people, they doxxed my cats after all. i'm sure they'll understand.

but i fear that it would be kind of a dick move to act all buddy buddy with a server who i went crazy on and harassed for months on end. but on the other hand i can't let my idol be at only third most monthly listeners in his old group!! so i don't know what to do, wibta if i went through with this?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole #god you could not pay me to be in a big popular band fandom #the small ones are bad enough when drama kicks off #this? no no no i'm good thanks

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soapoet · 1 year ago

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Who hurt you?

like & rb if it resonates ♡

01.

Shufflemancy: Feelings by EMELINE

This connection could've been so good and had so much potential to last, if it weren't for their near Machiavellian villainy. A power couple is not a dynamic between the crème de la crème who out of the blue and without warning shifts to through their words and actions make the other feel like a foolish peasant who couldn't possibly know better. To treat another like royalty then knock the crown they themselves laid atop your head down seemingly for no reason. Never at all cautious with their words, and worst of all entirely unreceptive of any feedback. Once told they have crossed the line, instead of compassion and asking for forgiveness, the music swells as they justify and explain as though you are but a child, merely overreacting, too emotional to understand and ought to see it from their high and mighty perspective. A person supposed to love you and be worthy of your trust talking down on you from their throne, and in their eyes you see only a heart cold as ice, unrelenting and certain that criticism is a threat and must be stricken down no matter how they claim to love you in the very next breath.

Now, however, they are really feeling the void you left behind when you walked away. For many of you this departure was originally a back and forth, in which you always wound up caught in their net, then escaped, only to be pulled back again. The final time you walked out they did not even flinch, certain you would come back again as always. Time crawled onwards and you were but an echo of the past, slowly fading, and the more days and weeks that flew by the more the feeling of defeat crept up on them. They tried to run, they tried to hide, denying that they had been abandoned. They filled their days with cheer and diversion, perhaps in part to appear at ease upon your return, though mostly because your silence had become deafening and so very frightening.

They're beginning to grow uncomfortable by the tightening of the noose they placed around their own neck when they hurt you. They feel choked up, and in panic they may be lashing out and casting blame everywhere outside of them and treating others poorly. A short fuse breaking their picture perfect image as they rampage at the slightest inconvenience. Unfortunate are those who bear witness to their disgrace and dishonour, but loyal in their steadfast duty to remain at their side knowing that though they're whipped there is good left and needs cleansing to be set free. This seems written in the stars. An important lesson for them to learn and take to heart. To face their shadow boldly and cut out the pieces that serve neither them, others, or the world. A purge is happening, in which they must overcome their own terrors and transmute them to light and make right the wrongs of the past. This can take some time, but you may hear from them, but not until the apologies are sincere and forgiveness may be bestowed upon them truly.

Additional details: substance abuse, red and orange, spicy food, birds (jays and chickens in particular), pigs, hedgehogs, discord servers and other groups of people (guilds and factions, group chats, etc.), upbeat music, travelling, blocked, disgust, unhealthy push and pull, twinflame terminologies, church, large gatherings, parties, family, parents, ex partners, LDR, Capricorn/Scorpio/Aquarius/Pisces, Pluto/Mars/Moon, 4H/5H/8H, January/April/September/December.

02.

Shufflemancy: Someone you loved by Lewis Capaldi

It really felt like the rug was pulled from beneath your feet. Out of nowhere, no less. You were lead to believe everything was good and fine and sudden the image shattered overnight, leaving you cornered in a room full of broken glass. Paralysed, shaking from anger and hurt and with no escape. It can seem as though your whole life was turned upside down. Like you no longer knew what or who you could trust. The burdens so much heavier on your shoulders as the whip cracks, signaling demands for you to run, run faster than ever before, with no direction other than "away". A door slammed in your face with a pocketful of change and the rains cruelly pouring down on your parade.

But, it had been alright. Right? Scrambling to figure out where things went wrong, at what part of the journey did you stumble away from the path, where did you stray? A search for answers yields only more questions to keep you up at night. Replaying the past like a favourite record, coming to find you no longer remember the lyrics and no song sounds familiar to you. What has become of this person? In your mind they are growing blurry though you hear their words so clearly. Afraid you'll forever be haunted by them and their cruel words and schemes. You look to other people who bore witness to this crime and find wolves in sheep's clothing in every previously kind smile, who now look upon you with disgust and turn away. You've never felt so alone and hopeless, forced to limp away to lick your wounds in the dark where hopefully nobody will find you and hurt you again.

Perhaps little birdies whispered in their ears, long enough to fuel any resentment held within to erupt in your face. Somebody who used to care and be so kind and promised to take care of you, suddenly switching to someone unrecognisable to you. You'll survive, I promise you this, and this ordeal will teach you greater independence so that never will you have to face something like this again. They will journey on with serpents and delude themselves into thinking they did what's right, and one day the little birdies will whisper in different ears to their demise and they will find themselves in your point of view. Perhaps then they will realise their wrongs and truly understand. By then you will be stronger and shine brighter, out in the world living a good life, and you will have the grace they did not and accept closure with no ill will. But until then it is okay for you to cry and scream of how much you hate their guts.

Additional details: Instruments, boxes, CDs and DVDs, childhood nostalgia, baby animals, creaky stairs, the smell of petrichor, rings, social work/healthcare, mental health concerns, sleepovers, long hair cut short, striped or mismatched socks, phone calls, short distance travel, siblings or cousins or other relatives your age, colleagues, brown/green eyes, trinkets/charms, exes and authority figures, Cancer/Sagittarius/Leo/Aries, Sun/Ascendant/Mercury, 4H/6H/11H, February/October/November.

03.

Shufflemancy: Famous last words by My chemical romance

This was messy from the very start. You may think now that, surely, this should never have happened at all. Retracing your steps wondering how and why and where you took this strange and awful detour. And why did it leave you so broken? At the time it was not supposed to be so serious, it was fun and games but you began losing every round. No matter the strategy you could simply never win and it was becoming no fun at all and you wanted out of the game. Yet they continued to cast the dice of your fate, and you were left hopelessly scrambling for even a semblance of stability. In fact, you were the one to provide such things, weren't you? At their lowest you dropped what you were doing to provide solutions to their problems so that they would not slip into despair. You devoted yourself to their issues, and they not at all to yours. Your grievances were inconvenient at best, frustrating and somehow a thorn in their side at worst. For some of you, this could've been a long-term friendship which came crumbling down out of the blue and left you shattered though it may have had more control of your life than you originally thought.

And after all you did, they did not choose you. Perhaps they chose another, or ran back to an old flame, like a moth towards a brighter light when they were done dimming yours through their words and actions, or lack of either. For some, their regards for you were altered or manipulated by people you could consider foes. This severance of ties was quick and left you shaken, even for those of you to whom this connection was very new still, and looking back had not been given the time to fully grow roots. Yet once it was uprooted, you took it worse than anticipated and you really were left wondering how they grew their vines around your heart and mind so fast. For many, there can be an element of extra grievance in the form of having known somebody in their quarters was a problem or a threat to your union. Like you were certain that the vultures would come to get their picking if you ever turned away for mere seconds too long, so seeing this person run into the arms of somebody you had on your radar despite their hollow reassurances could've exasperated your sense of betrayal. It is one thing to feel in your gut what could come and fear it from afar, and another to see it come to pass just as you had feared.

This was by no means an easy shift, but one which lead you to learn many important lessons. Your boundaries seem clearer now and you won't as easily let them be stepped on. Whilst you picked up the pieces left scattered on the floor, you took extra care to pick up only those that would serve you and your future. Any gossip or ill will you have directed elsewhere and chosen not to dig deeper, knowing you would only hurt yourself returning to the depths of obsession. Now you look for red flags they taught you, while they desperately search for you in those they meet, helplessly needing somebody to run their life the way you did with such tenacity and grace. There is no telling whether they ever will realise that the reason why their world falls apart every other Tuesday is because of their own words and actions, and I pity those who fall trap into the place you once called yours as it does not seem to be a position of any stability and longevity. At least you've come out of this stronger and firmer in your stance of who you want around and what you do and do not tolerate, and I applaud you for that. Should this be an old friend who one day asks for forgiveness, you may grant them that without lowering the drawbridge completely.

Additional details: sunshine, leather jacket, tinder or other dating apps, childhood friends, blonde or light brown hair, puppies, instagram, psychology, roses and sunflowers, photography, cosplay, glow ups, new adventures and experiences, growing up faster after time of hindered growth, university, book series, fandom spaces, tumblr, Scorpio/Sagittarius/Libra/Gemini, Saturn/Jupiter/Uranus/Moon, 3H/5H/9H/12H, March/July/November/December.

#pac reading #energy reading #intuitive reading #pick a card #pick a picture #pick a card reading #tarot reading #tarotblr #soapy.post

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jaegeraether · 9 months ago

Text

Sunsets and footballers (Part 65)

Jordan Nobbs x Leah Williamson (11) / Lucy Bronze x Reader (55)

Masterlist (other parts here)

Join our WOSO Discord chat! Link in bio :)

((** 4.6k**))

Mostly Leah and Jordan :)

Leah POV

“I didn’t wake you, did I? I completely blanked… you stopped replying and I didn’t even think.” Leah stressed as she drove.

“No, no, you’re all good. I’m a little too wound up to sleep for long until Luce gets home, I think. I’m just waiting for the next shoe to drop with this whole drama.”

“Is Ridley still there?”

“She left after I fell asleep, she has some meetings in town.”

“So you were asleep?”

“Barely… it’s okay. It’s probably a good thing you have someone to talk to for your drive…” She cleared her throat and yawned. “Oh shit, did you see Beth scored a brace?”

“No?! I was there for her first. First one back since her ACL, I was crying.”

“That’ll be you soon, mate.”

“Not this year,” she almost grumbled.

“Oh? January?” YFN’s tired voice piped up with excitement for her.

“I’m hoping so. I feel bad for leaving – I should be there to celebrate with Beth after the game.”

“Okay stop right there, that’s your anxiety talking. Beth knows that you needed to do go.” YFN’s support calmed Leah, and she knew she’d called the exact right person.

“Yeah… wait, did you speak to her?”

“I’m always chatting with the girls. A few of them are coming over after the game actually. It was last minute. I think Kyra got excited when she saw Lucy and invited herself and-”

“-and the rest of the girls jumped on board?”

“Something like that,” she laughed wearily. “So it’s a good thing I’m awake because I need to organise some food for when they get here.”

“Don’t you go over-exerting yourself mate.”

“Pfft, I’ve spent the last week laying or sitting… I’m happy to hop around and stretch my leg.”

Leah laughed at the way she’d said that. Her one leg. “You’ll have two legs next week!”

“Hopefully the doctor’s okay with me walking on it. I get to switch from a wheelchair to sexy walking stick. I really hope it’s okay enough to because I’m worried about Luce’s knee when she carries me everywhere.”

“Not surprised. Has her knee been acting up?”

“At the risk of getting her in trouble with her England Captain… yes. It’s been a bit swollen and I can tell it’s giving her pain. She tries to hide it.”

“She’ll never admit it’s sore, especially while you’re still healing.”

“I know, she’s a pain. I’ve been massaging it and insisting she ice it, though. She and Alexia have been working out and training together, so I just hope she’s being careful.”

Leah heard the worry in her voice and it made her think about Jordan. She was never nervous to watch anyone play… except Jordan. She couldn’t bear to watch her be pushed around. She was only small, after all.

“She’s been through this a lot, YFN. She knows her limits better than anyone I know. She’ll definitely be looking after herself.” Leah reassured her.

“Mmn. I know you’re right; I just worry.”

“Well let me distract you then. I spoke to Jill and Alex and they’re both excited for the podcast idea. They said you’ve been chatting with them?”

“Not as much as I’ve wanted to because of this drama, but yeah I’ve chatted to them a few times over the week. Alex is coming over tomorrow to talk a bit more about it all, and we’ll catch up with Jill when we go to Manchester next week.”

“Oh? Lucy’s missing home?”

“Always. Missing home and family so we’re going to see them.”

“When will you be back? I’m happy to do my interview whenever.”

She heard her clicking on what was potentially her laptop. “Uh… so next week I have pencilled in to bring a few of the girls into the office and do some interviews there.”

“Didn’t work out at your house?”

“Oh, no it definitely did,” she yawned again. “I figured it would build morale of my staff to meet some players, and we’ve set up a big studio there for content… and there’s a wall I’d like you all to sign.”

“A wall?”

“Just a little side-project of mine,” she chuckled. “It’ll make sense when you see it. Viv’s just been subbed on.”

“What minute?”

“Eighty-second.”

“Looks like overtime?”

“I missed most of the game but maybe three to five minutes.”

“A good ten minutes at least then. She’s been dying to stretch her legs out there.”

“They’re long enough.”

Leah laughed. She was glad she’d called her; their conversation was calming her at almost the same rate that she became more anxious as she got closer to Villa Park. YFN must have noticed.

“Are you far out?”

“Thirty minutes out. I was thinking of stopping and getting her some flowers. What do you think?”

“Well she loves flowers. I think she’d really like that Leah…” Her voice softened. “Just remember what I told you about when she sees you.”

Leah nodded even though she knew she couldn’t see it. ‘You watch her face when she sees you, Leah. In that first split second that it takes to recover her expression… you’ll see everything she’s feeling.’

This is why Leah thought she was so nervous. What if she was angry she hadn’t told her… or showing how heartbroken she still was? It would hurt, but Leah knew she’d accept whatever came her way, as it was all her own doing. She just wanted her, and their life back – though only if Jordan wanted that too.

“I will.”

“Are you sitting close to the benches?”

“Right near them in the family and friends’ section, yeah.” She didn’t know if she was imagining her voice wavering, or if it actually was.

“She’s going to be excited to see you, mate. I promise.”

Leah arrived just in time for the girls to exit the tunnel, having been delayed in the flower shop procrastinating over which was the best for her. She put it in the back seat of her black Mercedes, right next to the toy she’d bought for Blu.

She couldn’t believe how nervous she was, and YFN was right there with her, on the phone and then texting back and forth with her after they’d hung up. She knew she was busy with the Arsenal and West Ham girls dropping by, but she still made time for her. A few weeks ago, Leah would have thought she was doing it for Jordan’s sake, but she’d gotten so close to the Australian that she knew it was for hers also.

She sat in her assigned seat, saying a polite hello to the people she knew, and felt herself almost hyperventilate when Jordan entered the pitch in the starting line-up. She’d never had this reaction to her – or anyone before. It confused her, but at the same time, it made her realise just how much she meant to her. Jordan was looking too small for her clothes as always, her shorts and socks almost reaching each other. She wore that expression she did when she was on the pitch, her serious face. Football was serious for Jordan, and that was evident by just how aggressive and impatient she was on the pitch; a sharp contrast to what she was usually like in person. So sweet and kind and shy almost. Her Jordan. She felt her body tingling and her hands shake a little as she watched her taking their line-up photos and start to play.

Leah’s phone dinged and she looked down.

YFN: A bit of a healthy distraction for you.

YFN sent a photo.

The first was a photo of the group who’d invaded Lucy and YFN’s house. YFN had obviously asked Lucy to take a selfie of the group as they were all doing strange poses to the camera mid eating or talking, standing and sitting. Most of the Arsenal girls were there, along with half of the West Ham team. She grinned at the photo.

The second was a photo obviously taken from YFN’s position on the couch, pointing at Beth who was showing two fingers, Katie hanging off her with a ‘COME ON’ expression for Beth’s brace.

YFN’s efforts to distract her from herself were definitely working.

Leah: You’re not getting sleep anytime soon. *melting face emoji*

YFN: My bigger concern is that I didn’t order enough for a fucking tribe.

Leah chuckled. The girls were always extra hungry after games. She should have warned her. She looked up to see the ball nowhere near Jordan, and looked back down again to reply.

Leah: Why do I feel like I’m going to get home, and the party will still be going?

She looked back up to see Jordan crash into someone. She touched the ball, but was still warned by the referee and threw her hands up. That made her smile. That is… after she’d stood up and she knew she was okay.

Her phone buzzed.

YFN: Come 9pm I’ll be dragging them out kicking

YFN: That was Lucy ^^ but she’s not joking. *nervous laugh emoji*

YFN: She gets grumpy when she’s tired.

Leah knew that all too well, having been in many camps with Lucy.

Leah: She’s worse when she’s hungry!

YFN: I’ve learnt to sort that out before it becomes a problem.

YFN sent a photo.

It was a selfie of YFN sitting in the corner of the couch and angled up to Lucy not so elegantly stuffing her face. Regardless of Lucy’s full mouth, YFN looked at her with an expression of adoration. They looked so happy. Leah craved that happiness she’d once had with Jordan. For seven years they were the envy of the party and sitting in the stands now, watching her play from afar, she cursed herself for taking that… for taking her for granted.

She put her phone down to watch her play, again adoring the way Jordan jogged after whoever had the ball, her shorts almost falling off of her, and then attacking the players with the ball whenever she was close. It was evident just how much she loved the game. And as if all of that wasn’t adorable enough, she wore black gloves to fight the cold she felt. There wasn’t much to her, so she was always cold. Their house always needed to be hot enough that she didn’t feel the cold, but Leah had always sneakily liked to have it just the perfect temperature that she’d snuggle into her as they slept or tuck herself into her body on the couch or as she just went about her day. She too loved their hugs, just as much as Jordan. The way she fit into her body was like it was made for her. Jordan was so affectionate that she’d always kiss her neck in thanks.

Not recently of course. Recently there had been the soft hugs without the kissing, and without the talking. It was nice, but she missed all of it.

Jordan was knocked to the ground hard as she went for the ball and Leah flinched, leaning to the edge of her seat to get a better view. When Jordan didn’t get up straight away, she stood with several of the crowd and watched worriedly. As more people stood, she was up on her tip-toes to peer over everyone to see Jordan clutching her knee and the medics run over. Her heart sunk.

The teams used the opportunity to chat while she was being seen to, her face contorting in pain. Leah didn’t want to admit to herself that the smallest part of her wanted something to be wrong so she’d have time off and Leah could look after her. She felt so ashamed and shoved the thought aside as her other feeling took hold. ‘Not the knee,’ she thought. ‘Please not the knee. Get up Jord. Please get up.’

Someone tried to get her attention and she brushed them off, her eyes only on Jordan. The medics helped for several minutes until Jordan was standing again and hobbling across the pitch. She wanted to stay on.

Of course she did. She loved playing football.

They stopped for half time an even nil score, and Leah waited for Jordan to look up and see her as she wandered towards the tunnel, but she didn’t. To say she was disappointed would be an understatement. She let herself mingle with the people around her who she knew, and fifteen minutes later, the girls were re-entering the pitch. Jordan hadn’t been subbed, which was great, and although it wasn’t yet dark, it was even colder and she couldn’t help but stress about her getting sick. It was raining now, and so cold she could see her breath as she jogged back out. Her knee looked to be okay though, which was a good sign.

The first goal came in the 54th minute by an unfortunate own goal from Aston Villa’s Anna Patten. Jordan looked frustrated as she shook her head and jogged back to her spot.

It only took a minute for Rachel Daly to score an equaliser, Leah smiling as she watched Jordan jump and shout excitedly, though she didn’t run to celebrate with her team. There was something different about watching her with Villa. Leah had noticed watching Jordan’s games that she didn’t look as happy when she celebrated with Villa, and she’d always wondered if she was just biased, though seeing her not celebrate with them made her realise she wasn’t imagining it. She remembered the giant grin on her face as she used to run and jump into their group when she celebrated with Arsenal. She was always so light that Leah could barely feel her as she ran and jumped onto her.

Oh, Jord. She missed seeing her at training every day. But it wasn’t even that. As she watched her, she missed living together, driving in together, training together, going home together. They’d always sit next to each other when travelling and share hotel rooms.

She was ripped from her thoughts by Jordan stealing the ball in a clean move. She smiled. The game was back and forth pretty even following that, though Aston Villa were controlling the ball more. They just couldn’t seem to get past the Everton defence. It started raining heavier and Leah pulled her coat tighter around her. A penalty kick to Everton in the 74th minute had Jordan throwing her arms up again in frustration. The kick came… and it was a goal. It wasn’t looking good.

Three minutes later, Jordan was subbed off. She walked off looking defeated, though as she high-fived her subbed teammate at the boundary line, her head raised as if she knew she was there. Mid high-five her eyes caught Leah’s and she froze. Leah stopped breathing as she watch Jordan’s eyes widen with… yearning. Her eyes reflected the emotions Leah felt. Jordan recovered her expression and looked at the substitute, dropping her hands. As she stepped off the field, she let herself look back up with wonder. She could see the happiness in her eyes that she was there. Leah gave her a smile and a wave. Jordan didn’t wave back, but she did smile shyly as she ducked onto the bench where she could no longer see her.

Only then, could Leah breathe again. YFN was right. That surprised expression from Jordan had showed her everything. She wanted her, just as much as Leah did. She breathed a deep breath out and the built up anxiety disappeared with it. She should have never been worried. She knew Jordan.

The game ended 1-2 to Everton, and Leah stood in the stands until the girls disappeared into the tunnel. Jordan had looked up again only once… fleetingly, but Leah had seen it. She grinned to herself at that as she made her way outside to her car. She was hindered a few times by fans and autographs but by the time she stepped foot outside, her phone buzzed. She excitedly grabbed at it, assuming it was Jordan, but it wasn’t. She stopped at her car and looked down disappointedly at the notification on her phone.

“You’re here?” Came a slightly out of breath voice behind her.

She spun around to see Jordan standing all rugged up in her puffer jacket, her nose red and her legs looking freezing where they weren’t covered.

“I… came to see you play.”

Half of Jordan’s face was hidden beneath her collar, and Leah couldn’t tell if she was upset.

“Did I overste-”

She was interrupted by Jordan’s body meeting hers, her head finding her shoulder, forehead pressing against her neck. Jordan’s hands slid around Leah’s body inside her coat to keep warm. Jord. Leah’s arms were moving around her before she even told them to, holding her close and keeping her warm. It felt right to let them stay in their silence for a while until Jordan was ready.

“Thank you for coming to watch my game.”

She let her head lean against Jordan’s. “Of course I came. You pencilled in a hug, remember? I didn’t want you to drive so far after your game.”

She let out a grateful sigh and pressed herself further into Leah. “Thank you, Lea. I’m really tired.”

“Would you like to reschedule?”

A few fans must have spotted them then and Leah saw them getting excited and start to run over from the stadium.

“No!” She stressed and pulled back. “No… we can still-”

“-did you drive?” Leah cut off.

“One of the girls drove me…” She responded, unsure about Leah’s change of pace.

“Do you have all of your things?” She asked, gesturing to her backpack.

“Yeah.. I mean I think so-”

Leah took her bag off and opened her passenger door. Jordan hesitated, still unsure about Leah’s impatience. Leah saw her hesitating and softened. “Let me drive you home please, Jord.”

Jordan’s eyes wandered over Leah’s face before she nodded and slipped into the car. As quickly as she could, Leah placed her backpack in the back seat and jumped in the driver’s seat as the mob of fans were almost on top of them. She saw Jordan’s eyes widen in realisation as Leah started the car and put some distance between them.

Most of the time, she’d be open and welcoming and go out of her way for the fans. Tonight, she just wanted to protect Jordan from that. She just wanted to get her home into where she knew she’d be warm and comfortable and could sleep.

Leah stopped the car abruptly at the exit of the car park.

“Lea?”

“I…” She turned to Jordan. “I don’t know where you live…” she admitted. She hated not knowing that.

Jordan gave her a supportive smile and leant forward towards Leah’s phone mounted to the dash. She paused, looking for permission first, but Leah wasn’t worried at all. She had nothing to hide from Jordan, ever, and she showed that by looking at her with patience. Jordan hid a smile as she typed her address into Leah’s phone and soon enough, they were on their way.

“Do you want to have dinner?”

“Are you sure you’re not too tired?”

“I’d like dinner with you…”

Leah smiled as she drove. She dared not look at her, but knew Jordan was watching her. She wanted to have dinner with her.

“We can do that, Jord. Whatever you want.”

“And maybe we can watch the Lord of the Rings?”

“I thought it scared you?”

“Well, yeah, but you like it.”

It also meant they had more time together, as they’d barely gotten through any of it that last time they were alone. She also liked the idea of Jordan hiding behind her at the scary parts. “You’re okay to stay up late?”

She rolled her eyes. “It’s only gone seven. It’ll be done by eleven.”

Leah frowned. “I’m confused… you want to go out for dinner?”

“God no, I think we should order in.”

“We only had an hour and a half left, Jord.”

“Well, yeah, but I figured we could start at the beginning because I forgot what happened.”

Leah chuckled. It wasn’t beyond Jordan to forget, but as she snuck a look at her, she looked more like it was a sneaky excuse for more time together. “We can do that. I don’t mind a late drive.”

“You can stay… I can take the couch.”

Jordan’s obvious willingness to spend time with Leah softened her. She hadn’t felt so happy in a long, long time. Over a year, when she and Jordan were previously together.

“YFN offered me her bed on the condition that you let me stay…”

Jordan laughed. “Of course she did. You can take her bed then, we don’t want you driving home so late. Did she say anything else?”

“I just have a few things to pick up for her… clothes and what-not.”

“She said she wants to stick around London while she’s healing,” she nodded. “I’ll help you pack her stuff up.”

“Thanks Jord.”

There were a few minutes of silence then as Leah went into her own headspace, her face falling into its natural grumpy look as she did so. Jordan noticed.

“What are you thinking?”

Leah considered brushing her off, but she knew better now. “I have something to tell you but I don’t want it to ruin the night. You just need to know.”

“Okay…”

“The video is handled.”

She waited for questions, for emotion, but there was none. She replied after a few seconds of thought. “Okay, Lea.”

Lea pulled into the driveway and put the car in park, turning to look at her. “Okay?”

Jordan nodded and gave her a little smile. “Okay, Lea. I trust you.”

“Okay…” she replied huskily and reached into the back seat. “This is for Blu,” she said as she handed her the toy. She reached back again. “And these are for you.”

Jordan took the flowers with an excited expression. “Thanks, they’re pretty. And you can give this to him if you want… I think he’s going to be excited to see you.”

She handed the toy back to Leah.

Blu was all over her when they entered the apartment. She chuckled and gave him love and pats before his attention turned to Jordan. Leah couldn’t help but look around her and take in the place Jordan now called home. It suited her. She recognised all of the photos and little trinkets she had around, and the smell was even the same with the incense she liked to burn. And it was warm… Jordan warm.

They ordered take-away and Leah played with Blu while Jordan showered and changed. As they waited for their food, they found a vase for the flowers and packed the few clothes and items YFN needed in London. They chatted, laughed, and caught up with the recent activities in each other’s lives. Jordan shared her frustrations about her game and Leah cheered her up with photos YFN had sent her of the chaos at her and Lucy’s apartment. It felt so normal. She was happy for them to be talking again, and their recent silent dates together had developed a sense of calm and comfort in those silent moments between them.

The food arrived and they settled onto the couch with blankets and began the movie. Jordan let Leah set Blu up in his little bed in front of them and he fell asleep quickly. He was always a big sleeper, tired from walking around on those little legs all day, Leah imagined with a chuckle at the thought. There were sat close enough that their arms were partially against each other and Leah relished the moments where Jordan had to pause eating to hide her head behind her shoulder at the scenes that scared her. Jordan finished eating first, obviously, as she was so tiny she barely ate anything and the next time she came up from her hiding place behind Leah, her head stayed on her shoulder, her hand gently holding her arm. Leah let her rest in that spot, trying to keep her movements small as she ate with her left hand. After only a few minutes, though, she felt uncomfortable. She put her food down on the coffee table and sat back again, Jordan laying back down on the spot she’d claimed. Leah lasted another ten minutes until she wriggled uncomfortably, unable to keep still.

Jordan lifted her head. “Are you okay, Lea?”

“I…” she paused and pulled herself in check. Honesty always. “It’s just the cramps. They’re bad today.”

“Your endo?”

“Yeah,” she sighed. The drive had been bad enough.

Another cramp seized her and she squeezed her eyes shut and shuddered in pain.

“Did you bring your medication?”

“It’s in my bag,” she groaned.

“Stay here.” Jordan said as she stood, pausing their movie and taking the food to the kitchen. She returned quickly and leant over the couch, giving her a glass of water and her painkillers.

“Thanks, Jord.”

“Is it your lower back too?”

She nodded as she swallowed the pills, angry at herself for again ruining a night with Jordan.

She disappeared again and Leah heard the microwave, and the fridge doors.

“Do you need help?”

“I’m fine, just putting the food away. Give me a minute.”

The microwave finished and Leah heard the door opening and Jordan padding back over with two heat packs. Her mouth parted in awe as she looked up into her eyes. Jordan was taking care of her.

“Lay down, Lea.” She said as she guided her down, pulling a pillow under her head. Leah did as she was told, letting herself be looked after by her. Jordan gently put her on her side facing the tv, and placed a heat pack on her lower abdomen, and her lower back, tucking them into the waistband of her pants and pulling her shirt back down.

“Feel better?”

Leah couldn’t speak, so she just nodded.

“Do you need anything else?”

She was about to shake her head when she stopped herself and instead tugged lightly on Jordan who smiled. She took the remote and pressed play, slipping behind Leah, under the blanket. She pulled another pillow over so her head was higher and hesitantly, her hand found her abdomen which she tenderly rubbed in circles above her shirt. They’d done this so many times over the years, but this time it felt more personal, and even more special.

“Can you see the tv?” She murmured, relishing the feel of a warm Jordan pressed up against her back, her arm slung over her.

“Yeah.”

Leah inhaled sharply again at another cramp. Jordan paused her circling to hold pressure against the heat bag over her lower abdomen. That always helped.

“Why didn’t you cancel?”

“I told you I won’t make another mistake.”

She’d thought back to the promise she’d left her in a note, ‘…that was the last fault I’ll make…. no more mistakes…’

Jordan was silent for a moment as she thought about that. Her hand began circling her abdomen again reassuringly. “How do you feel?”

“Comfy.” Leah responded, proud of her little inside joke as she felt and heard Jordan chuckle behind her.

And then she felt Jordan’s lips touch the nape of her neck and linger, pouring affection and reassurance into her. Leah leant back into the kiss and felt that feeling she’d been missing for so long.

She felt like she was home.

#woso #womens football #woso community #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woso soccer #engwnt #lionesses #lucy bronze #lucy bronze x reader #lucy bronze imagine #jordan nobbs #leah williamson #aston villa women #arsenal women #woso x reader

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lemonlover1110 · 11 months ago

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𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐬

Satoru Gojo

[Chapter 17] Father and Son

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Pairing: Satoru Gojo x f!Reader

Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi

Satoru tries to make up for the past four years of Ren’s life in a matter of weeks. His focus drastically changes, from his work to his son. He ignores the matter of so many people knowing before him, he avoids his mother and his so-called friends. His main and only priority is his son.

You both wish you could say that your relationship has gotten better, but you don’t really speak to each other unless it’s about the son you share. You’re hopeless that it’ll progress past what you have. Neither of you have the courage to bring up the situation, either way, your attention should be on Ren.

Ren is finally meeting the man that he’s been dreaming of, and he’s getting to know his father after four years. You’re mostly excited for your son, while also regretting hiding it when you had the chance to tell him. Your relationship is the last thing on your mind– It’s certainly the last thing in Satoru’s mind.

He visits daily, bearing many gifts for his son. Satoru has become a regular at the toy store, buying something each day for his son, something that he thinks Ren would like. He hopes that material stuff will make up for the time wasted. Sometimes he brings some candy, but he doesn’t do it often. Satoru is still his father, he can’t just spoil him rotten, he also has to care for Ren’s wellbeing. He’s slowly growing accustomed to becoming a parent.

“What’s this, Ren?” Satoru holds up a cute white cat plush, one that Satoru always finds on the bed. He wonders if that’s the toy his son has had ever since he was a baby, he guesses it is since Satoru feels like he’s seen it in the background of a picture before.

“It’s whiskers.” Ren answers, taking the plush from his father and putting it back on the bed. That’s before he turns to other matters. Ren doesn’t mind sharing his toys (because you’ve been the one raising him), but whiskers is someone that Ren doesn’t like anyone touching. Anyone and anything can get the toy dirty, and when that happens, you refuse to let the toy on the bed, at least not before you wash it and get it clean again.

Satoru doesn’t bother to ask if that’s the plush that he sleeps with, because that’s most certainly a yes. Ren wants to talk about other important matters though so Satoru gives his undivided attention to his son. Ren then asks, “Are you sleeping over?”

“Uhm… No.” Satoru answers. You most certainly wouldn’t want that. Plus, Satoru has a wife at home who has her suspicions that something is going on. He doubts that she’ll care too much, but he wants to keep Ren protected from the world. If Sayo finds out, so does her family, and if her family knows, the whole world will know. “But I’ll stay until you fall asleep, Ren.”

“I want you to stay.” Ren sticks out his bottom lip, obviously disappointed that his father isn’t staying for the night. You let him on your bed all the time and you sleep together, why can’t he do the same thing with his father? Satoru can’t help but feel bad, so he thinks of how to respond to cheer him up.

You commented how you had plans of going on a small trip with Ren before summer ended, but summer evidently has come to an end. It’s colder now and the leaves are changing color. Satoru finally decides, “We can go on a trip soon, and we’ll be together all day every day.”

“Really?” The little boy’s eyes light up, making the biggest smile come to Satoru’s lips. Satoru now wonders how he was ever happy without him– Well, with you… But that memory slowly fades away since your relationship is now filled with awkwardness. Satoru nods his head in response. He can lie and make it a business trip, it’s not an issue for him really.

“We’ll have to talk to your mommy first, honey. Then we can plan it all.” Satoru answers, and Ren turns around to go look for you. Satoru feels awkward sitting alone on a bed that’s far too low and small for him. He stands up and follows Ren. They both look for you around the apartment until they land in your bedroom. The bathroom door is closed, and Ren immediately knows what to do.

Ren opens the door to the bathroom, and you immediately make eye contact with Satoru. Your face grows hot of embarrassment, and obviously Ren doesn’t see an issue with it. Ren’s issue is when he actually steps into the bathroom, and he just has to comment, “It stinks.”

“Yeah, I wonder why. Get out, Ren, and close the door!” You raise your voice, your embarrassment getting the best of you. Ren closes the door, leaving you to it, and Satoru chuckles. He ruffles Ren’s hair as both walk out of your bedroom.

“You gotta learn how to knock, baby. Give your mommy some privacy.” Satoru says, but it goes one ear out the other. Ren isn’t going to knock, you’re his mommy. If you want your privacy you better lock the door. They take a seat in the living room, where Ren grabs the remote to put on a movie. He knows how to get the movie he wants, even when he’s just learning how to read and spell.

“Where do you want to go?” Satoru asks, wondering where his son wants to go. Ren drops the remote on the couch, putting his tiny index finger on his chin, humming and tilting his head to the side as he thinks of the answer.

“The beach.” Ren answers, but it’s cold. They can go out of the country though, go somewhere warm. He needs to talk to you first, of course. When you finally walk out of your bedroom (after mentally cursing your son for not having any manners when others are around), you go to the living room to see what they needed.

“What did you need, Ren?” You ask, and he looks excitedly at you. Satoru is the one that speaks up for him though,

“We want to go on a trip, can we?” You almost laugh since Satoru sounds like a hopeful child.

“Where are you two going?” You respond. You can’t really say no because Satoru is supposed to have equal authority as Ren’s father.

“Ren wants to go to the beach.” Satoru answers, Ren nodding in agreement. You cross your arms, your brows furrowing.

“It’s too cold to go to the beach, do you not have any other place in mind?” You point out, making Ren pout. The pout doesn’t last long though since Satoru says,

“We can go to another country. Somewhere warm with better beaches.” You’re certainly not convinced since you doubt you’re part of the plan. You’re not letting your baby boy in another country without you– Well, technically he’d be with his father, but you’re still not convinced. Until Satoru says, “Of course, you’re included! I doubt Ren would go anywhere without you.”

“I wouldn’t.” Ren affirms, and you laugh.

“If you plan everything, then sure. We can go on a trip. You need to give me time off though– Paid time.” You say, and Satoru nods in response. He does pretty much everything you ask of him, and you certainly can’t complain about it. Ren focuses on putting on one of his favorite movies, and you begin to walk to the kitchen, asking, “Are you staying for dinner, Satoru?”

“Yeah.” Satoru answers. He’d definitely rather eat here with his son and you than dine alone at home. He helps Ren put the movie on, and they both begin to watch the movie. He’s watched this movie around five times the past week, and to be honest, Satoru is sick of it. But he’ll watch it because Ren loves it.

He’s grateful when you call his name, and he has to tell Ren that you need him, so he can’t stay to watch the movie. Satoru walks to the kitchen, and he finds you trying to reach something that’s far too high for you. Satoru’s eyes land on the white bowl and he reaches for it before handing it to you. You mutter a thank you, and you expect him to go back to Ren, but he doesn’t. You then tell him, “That’s all I need from you, you can go.”

“Do you need help with anything else? You know I love Ren but… I’m sick of that movie.” Satoru answers, earning a chuckle from you. You think about what he can do for a moment, and he patiently waits for you to answer.

“You can make the salad, and then set the table.” You respond, and you think you’ll regret it for a moment. Satoru has had everything done for him, he probably doesn’t know how to cut a cucumber; but then you remember that he lived alone for some time, he had to cook for himself for a while. Satoru immediately gets to work, opening the fridge to get all the vegetables that he needs. He looks around the cabinets and drawers for the cutting board and knife, and he quietly begins to cut the vegetables.

“Have you talked to Shoko?” Satoru asks, washing the lettuce throughout. Pretty much everything is wrong between the two of you, but you can’t just stand in awkward silence every single day. You have to talk to each other, after all, you doubt you’ll stop seeing each other.

“I haven’t. I’m not going to for a while.” You reply. In Satoru’s eyes, she did nothing wrong. He’s glad that Shoko told him, otherwise, he probably wouldn’t be with Ren. But in a sense, he understands why you don’t want to talk to her. “Tell her to stop calling my phone because I’m not going to answer. I’ll call her when I’m ready.”

“I’m not really talking to her either.” He responds.

“Is it because she has the hots for your wife?” You blurt out, and you bite your tongue the moment the words leave your lips. Satoru’s brows raise, definitely surprised by your words. You can’t be serious, can you? Before he can ask more questions about it, you change the topic, “Speaking of… When are you going to tell Sayo about Ren? She’s your wife, she has to find out eventually.”

“Maybe after our trip… I’m not sure how to tell her.” Satoru shares, and you understand that it’s a tough situation. He has to figure out a way to tell his wife of almost five years that he had a kid that’s almost five– And he never cheated, he just found out about him. This was all before their marriage. It’s definitely hard. Satoru clears his throat, mustering up the courage to ask about Suguru, someone else that he has been ignoring. “So… How are you and Suguru? Are you still seeing each other?”

“We’ve been busy, but we’re still… Talking.” You answer. You won’t lie and say that you don’t feel nauseous every time you talk to him, your heart nearly beating out of your chest for the simple fact that you lied to him. He has to find out that you lied eventually. “Have you talked to him?”

“I’m not talking to him. I’ve been ignoring him. I’ve been ignoring everyone.” Satoru responds. He puts the knife down, watching you as you begin to cook. He bites down his lip, holding back on saying a couple of things that are on his mind. About this situation, about you and Suguru, maybe an apology. Satoru has been a complete mess with so many things going in his mind, but not voicing any of them. He does have to ask one question though, “Is Ren the reason why you quit school?”

“Yeah…” You feel embarrassed to say it. “I couldn’t afford both. It was either my baby or school, and that was an easy choice.”

“Sorry…” He mutters, and it’s barely audible but you hear it. You don’t really pay attention to it, in the end it was your decision. Given the option, you’d do it all over again.

#[changes]#gojo saturo #satoru gojo #gojou satoru x you #jjk satoru #gojou satoru x reader #jujutsu kaisen gojo #jjk gojo #gojo angst #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #gojo satoru #jujutsu gojo #gojo x reader #gojo fanfic

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calamiitywrites · 2 months ago

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— qimir x osha

apothecary headcanon: a headcanon, mostly from osha's pov, of the apothecary scene.

note from author: So, we've been lowkey talking about this scene on my oshamir discord server because I pointed out how watery osha's eyes are in the scene. It made me feel like there was so much going on in her head the entire time this scene was happening and I just wanted to put my own spin on her thoughts. this is all from my own theories so please do not adopt it as truth. I would actually love to see other interpretations of this scene so if you have one please let me know / comment etc. thanks! - calamiity

The moon was her only friend with the way that it hid her secrets in the night. She would have preferred to work under its cover, but Sol and the others demanded answers now—and so did she.

Mae, was alive. That meant that she had survived the fire and had been living all this time. Where had she been hiding? Why had she returned now? What drove her to kill Jedi, and for how long had she been doing so? — so many questions, but no answers to satiate them. Just an endless precession of her screaming into the void praying to hear something back. Only to be faced with the darkness no different than the darkness that surrounded her now.

It curled its impeccable fingers around her and danced against the midnight blue cloak that she threw on to her body to resemble the phantom who wore her face. It was both a comfort and a torment; a guise that filled her body with a level of unease so powerful that it made her body ache.

Each breath she took rattled against her lungs with a sense of self loathing and discomfort. she felt like a stranger in her own skin and the moment she walked into the apothecary shop, she felt as though she were a marionette manipulated by strings that were far too short to get the job done.

Her body moved slowly across the front window of the shop and her reflection caught her eye in a twisted mockery of reality. she was nothing more than a semblance of the sister she once knew, a stranger whose form inspired nothing but betrayal and anger. Every detail of her disguise was a contribution of the deceit that she was meant to embody. Her walk, her cloak, the intricate style of her hair and even her tone. How was she meant to personify a sister that she didn't know? They shared nothing but a face, a mere shadow of kinship. Why was it so difficult for them to get that, beneath the surface, their very essences were in contrast?

“Hello...” The word slipped from her lips with a voice that was distant and cold. So altered and strange that it reverberated with an unfamiliar authority which was in complete opposite to the trembling anxiety within her.

"Hello." He responded casually.

"Hi."

"Hi." he retorted, the simplicity of his reply holding a sense of humor that seemed to mock her. "You alright? You're back so early."

There was a subtle shift in his tone, a smooth transition from casual to what sounded like concern. This surprised her to the point where she was nearly startled. If he was really just someone that Mae had bought a poison from then why did he bear such an emotional weight? Even his transition from behind the counter to align himself with her and offer his full attention suggested a deeper connection. Was it possible that he and Mae were more to each other than she first thought?

His words were smooth and enigmatic the way they wrapped around her like a silken thread, pulling at her curiosity leaving her with no choice but to engage. she couldn't lie, the concern reflected in his tone pleased her. it reminded her of how sol used to interact with her before she began working on the ship.

Every muscle in her body tensed, every nerve was on edge and she struggled to maintain the fragile mask of composure. In an effort to save her face from falling into a look of utter despair, her eyes ventured off to the boiling pot in the distance for a distraction.

"I wanted to see you." It was a risky confession to play on her suspicions, but when his eyes lit up in response she lifted her chin in an effort to avoid the feeling of her facade threatening to suffocate her.

"To see me, oh....Mae ...uh are you ok? Did the poison work?" his surprise was clear and his confusion seemed genuine.

She couldn't suppress the slight nod of her head as the realization of her mistake set in. It was as if an audible light bulb had flickered to life in her mind, so loud that she feared he might hear it. If they weren't friends then what were they?

Her overall sense of confusion gave way to an overwhelming anger at the idea that she was even being forced to do this in the first place. She had devoted her entire life to the Jedi. Every step she made was meant to bring her closer to her dream of being her own person. Yet here she was, forced to embody someone else. Her life was meant to be her own, but the Jedi had made it relatively clear that the only value she had to them was if she became a mere shadow of herself. They simply needed her to play the role of Mae — to wear a deceitful mask to extract crucial information. There was no proving herself. There was no working her way up. She would never be good enough for them.

The only reason she wasn't a jedi now was because of the decisions of Mae. The reason her coven was dead was because of Mae. The reason she was arrested was because of Mae. The reason she was here, talking to him, right now, was because of Mae. Mae's decisions had stolen her life, claimed her coven, led to her arrest and now her every action was dictated by the remnants of Mae.

Mae. Mae. Mae.

Did anyone ever wonder about Osha? Did anyone ask how she felt about discovering her sister was alive? Did anyone question her thoughts on the possibility of capturing or even killing Mae?

"You're acting so strange." He continued, but she could barely hear him over her own thoughts.

It’s not fair. Why am I even here with him? The Jedi didn’t destroy our family; Mae did. Killing Indara, Kelnaka, Torbin, and Sol won’t undo any of that. Why can’t she just take responsibility for her actions? Why did she have to set that fire? Why did she have to cause all of this mess? I just want to be myself—why is that so selfish? I hate her. I shouldn’t hate her… she’s lost, confused. It’s wrong to harbor hatred for her. She’s my sister. She’s family. If I hate her, doesn’t that make me just as bad?

"Wait...You killed Torbin without the poison, he will be so pleased." he continued with a voice laced in satisfaction. She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't even notice that he had gotten closer to her. There was a brief moment of hesitation on her part where she had half a mind to back away, but it was too late.

"No I used it, I just wanted to thank you." her voice was barely above a whisper. She couldn't speak louder without revealing the tremor in her tone. She couldn't tell if it was rage or sorrow, but it was so intense that she could almost taste it. She was losing her control and the sight of his eyes on her simply made it worse. It was as if he were drinking in every movement she made, there was no room for error.

But it hurt. so. much. The pain of betrayal, the torment of loss, and the agony of deceit all came together, creating a storm that reflected in a rage behind her eyes. She was trapped in between her own chaos and the quiet atmosphere of his shop.

There is a sense of clarity in his eyes and they flickered to her lips in a way that was more intimate than what she was expecting. Did he see them quiver? Did he notice her attempt to keep them pressed together to stave off tears?

He moved again, closing the distance between them with a dangerous proximity that seemed almost predatory. It was something about the way his eyes looked at her that caused her to pause. It wasn't the casual look of concern like before, there was realization in his eyes. They searched her face and for a moment she could swear that he saw her.

"You look.....exactly like her." He muttered as if didn't mean to say it aloud. Even though his words were clear to her, she couldn't move. It was his eyes that held her in place. They searched her face, moved down her frame and drank in her posture in a way that made her feel exposed in more ways than one. It wasn't until his eyes returned to hers that she felt an ominous intent that she couldn't decipher, an edge that left her trembling.

She wanted to question him. She wanted to get to the bottom of his relationship with Mae and how he knew she wasn't her. But the distant, echoing sound of footsteps brought her back to the present. With a sharp intake of breath, she instinctively lifted her gun and stepped away from him.

The Jedi would get to the bottom of this.....

#osha x qimir fanfic #qimir x osha #osha and qimir #osha aniseya #oshamir #osha the acolyte #osha x qimir #star wars the acolyte #star wars #star wars qimir #qimir the acolyte #qimir #qimir fanfic #osha fanfiction #qimir fanfiction #osha apothecary scene #qimir apothecary scene #osha headcanon #headcanon

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