#> it makes me wish mutuals on here could hang out i just know we could have such a baller halloween party arrrghrgh

[waloeders]

hihi am abt to go to sleep (i have to be up for train to fob) but pls check out some halloween fit pics >:33

these r such bad pics argrhrrhgrhrh i didnt wanna be that guy takin pics but still !!!!! the look slayed yippeee <333 lots of love n gn

[eupheme]

Your best friend Wade who always jokingly flirts with you the way he flirts with everyone - and you hate it because you have a real genuine crush on him and the flirting doesn’t mean anything… does it? It has to take a mutual friend to be like “oh my god he’s in love with you and doesn’t know how to tell you, so that’s why he’s always joking about boners” (please and thank u ilu 😌)

omg avo this kicked my ass, the amount of pining for Wade as he (jokingly, you think) flirts with you would be off the charts 🥲💖 I wrote a little drabble with how that might go, I love you and your ideas - thanks so much for sending this to me!!!

— cause every time we touch (i get this feeling)

best friend!wade wilson x mutant!reader

<1k | flirting, dirty jokes, heaps of pining

Blow job. Leg Spreader. Slippery Nipple. Liquid Viagra. Sex on the Pool Table. Pink Silk Panties.

Each time Wade comes into Sister Margaret’s - which is four or five times a week - he asks for dirtier and more obscure drinks.

"Wishful thinking", he tells you, each time.

Even with the roll of your eyes, you have to admit that it keeps you on your toes. That you look forward to seeing your best friend so often - tamping down the jolt in your belly, night after night.

Reminding yourself that yes, he got you this job, but he's not here to see you.

That this always was his spot.

It had been an easy sell. Used to working overnight shifts - security, back then. After the disaster with Weasel, they had been desperate for a replacement. Wade had come to you immediately, dropping to his knees as you opened the door.

Winning you over with a "you could literally get paid to hang out with me. How is this not a win-win-win? How is this not your dream job?"

And here, you didn't have to hide what or who you were. Reading feelings and intent were a bonus, when a handshake could tell you everything you needed to know. Their feelings spilled as easily as they were written, when you were negotiating contracts.

It also helped in-house. A human lie detector. Able to break up fights, settle arguments. A party trick, when things got slow. The regulars trying to get things past you - tales based in truth spun tall, seeing when you'd catch them.

Wade never plays, but you think that's because you know him so well.

And what seems like a sell, quickly evolves into more. Warping, as days pass. Spending more time with a crush sounds tempting, on paper.

The reality is something else.

Yes, there is a seat saved for him at the bar. Literally saved - his name scrawled across the vinyl, and you still haven't been able to scrub it out. Stopping by at all hours to chit chat.

Teasing you - how he's "so glad he doesn't have to stalk you at your old job anymore". An over-the-top sigh about being relieved that you're safe now - in your new job, surrounded by mercs.

Begging for the best job. Puppy-dog eyes. Fake coupons for favors that would make a sinner blush. Crossing his heart that you could have anything, and he means anything you wanted, if he could only get "that thing involving the murder clowns".

It's enough to make you hope.

Later, at home - in the early hours as you're pulled under. Replaying his comments. The filthy jokes and the shameless flirting - wondering if that's all they were.

Wondering if he'd be waiting for you tomorrow, perched on his stool.

But there's the downfall.

You see him - but you also see him with everyone else.

The charming smiles. Head thrown back in a laugh as he works the room. A friend to all, and as you watch him - perched on the knee of a goddess of mercenary as he yaps away, you can't help the swift current of jealousy.

Of foolishness.

It's enough that you're almost regretting agreeing.

Your mood is sullen, as you wipe down glasses. Trying to ignore the ache when you see him flirt. That realization that the something special you thought he had with you, might just be a part of his personality.

And when Dopinder shuffles from the back with more ice for the chiller behind the bar, it only takes one look at you before he's sighing.

"Not again. Please, I am begging you. I cannot take more of your yearning.”

Your lips quirk. Hadn't realized you'd become that obvious. He'd become your go-to, in the long hours you spend together behind the bar. Pinkie-promising not to say a word - but you always thought you'd had a decent handle on your expressions.

"We don't have to talk about it." Your hands raise, placating, "Just let me yearn in peace. I'll get over it."

"You know that almost half of what DP makes a month is funneled back in here, right?" He gives you a long look, "Before you, I saw him once a week. I had to beg him to come get his paycheck."

Doubt still lingers.

"Doesn't mean anything," You shrug - eyes dropping, as you help him restock.

"You do not think Mr. Pool worships the ground you walk on?"

The intensity of his question has you side-eying him, "I mean... I don't think he sees me that way. He acts the same with me as he does with everyone."

“Sure.” He huffs, leaning against the bartop, just as Wade plunks down in the seat in front of you.

“God, I haven’t been over here in like-,” Wade checks a fake watch, “Fifteen minutes? Feels like longer. Felt like a fucking hour.”

Pivoting back and forth on the stool as he adds, “Is it possible for people to get separation anxiety? Or is that just dogs? Is this how Dogpool feels when I’m gone?”

You just manage to catch the last bit, as Dopinder slips away.

“Exactly the same.”

Tonight, Wade is the first person that sits down in front of you for the game.

A frown, as you peel off your gloves - your barrier, to the outside world.

His own already bare - sliding back-and-forth over his suit-clad thighs. You'd mistake it for nerves, if you weren't so sure Wade had never been nervous in his life.

"What's your story, Wilson?" You ask, "Hope you brought something good."

"Oh, it's a whopper. A real fucking doozy. Apparently, you're not gonna believe it. " His laugh is a little too loud, and your eyes narrow, "But let's give it a whirl, okay?"

There's a flicker, behind the bar. A sideways look towards the bar, where Dopinder's hands cover his face. You don't need to touch him to read the guilt written across his features - the way he almost flinches, under your glare.

You're going to fucking kill him.

The sound of your name brings you back.

“Ready to play?”

Wade's hands rest face-up on the table - an offering. For once in his life he almost looks serious, and it’s enough to bring you back.

A breath - before you align your own. Letting them drop down, skin mapping against skin for the first time.

It floods through you.

The lick of heat that almost feels like a caress. A deep yearn that causes your own heart to twinge, layering with the feeling of need. Desire. Want.

It's familiar. It mirrors something deep inside, something that’s become as much a part of you as flesh and bone.

Oh.

A laugh slips from you, breaking the beat of silence. Relief tinged with disbelief - your smile stretching wide.

“Yeah?” You breathe, softening.

“Yeah.” He laughs, “Thought I was being obvious. But you are pound-cake dense, apparently.”

Hands flipping over, to entwine between yours. Letting that feeling inside him linger, settling warm and comforting over your bare skin.

“But I like that about you.” Another huff of a laugh, “Like all of you, really. Always have.”

It makes your heart ache. In a way that finally feels full, feels right - instead of the near-agony you’ve been bearing for weeks.

Only you could be such an idiot.

thanks for reading! 💖

[justlillythinking]

idk where to put requests bc i barely ask for stuff on here but basically my idea was this. neteyam x human reader that is hella funny. friends to lovers type thing where he feels his responsibilities and stress slip away when hes with them. kiss kiss love confession type thing. gn or fem would be cool mookie

neteyam x human!reader imagine

1.7k words

warnings- sfw, mutual pinning, soft fluff, a little angst ? love confessions

also while writing this it was inspired by in love with you by erykah badu and boogie nights/all night by erykah badu

hanging out with the sullys is always interesting, from going on ikran rides to sneaking on missions. when lo'ak says that you should all go on a ride right before eclipse, neteyam is fast to object.

"come on bro, you know dad is going to slaughter us if we are out at eclipse, lets just go tomorrow."

spider huffs before jumping on lo'aks ikran. god, my brother is such an ass, sometimes i just want to slap him so hard he can't feel his face for a week. i give neteyam a look, us both understanding that the only way to keep our stupid brothers in line is to follow them and keep them safe. he helps me up onto his ikran and we take off after spider and lo'ak, soaring in the calm sunset.

after flying for 10 minutes, spider and lo'ak land somewhere in the floating mountains, neteyam and i follow after them. when we touch down, neteyam picks me up and sets me down; something he loves to do to remind me he’s 3 feet taller than i am.

“fucking skxawng”, i mutter under my breath. before i can even turn around to shoot him a dirty look, he picks me up by my waist with one hand, laughing at me kicking him.

“what was that you just said?” he asks, still laughing at me.

i shoot him the dirtiest glare possible, “ i called you a fucking skxawng, skxawng. now put me down before i rip your braid out.”

neteyam laughs and sets me down, walking away like i huff. we both eventually walk over to spider and lo’ak, sitting beside them and admiring the forrest. we all talk and joke around, laughing about stupid jokes and talking about rumors. we eventually get on the topic of crushes, me teasing spider about his growing crush on kiri, neteyam rolling his eyes like lo’ak complains.

“cuz, come on, that’s my sister i don’t need to know that you want to bang her bro. how would that even work anyways, a human and a na’vi??”

i sigh to myself, knowing what lo’ak says about a human being with a na’vi is true and that neteyam and i will probably never grow to something more than just being friends.

little do i know, neteyam is having the same thoughts, wanting and wishing we could be more than friends, when in reality he knows that kissing me is probably off the table because of my exopack.

the conversation between all of us dissipates as we quiet down, all thinking about different things. i stand up and brush my legs off before saying we should head back so we can be home before eclipse. neteyam agrees while our brothers sigh with “do we have too” and “just like 5 more minutes i swear.”

we eventually all start walking back to the ikrans, lo’ak and spider racing each other. neteyam and i trail behind, talking and shoving each other and laughing. i look at him, the sunset shining on his beautiful blue skin and as it gets darker outside his freckles start shining. i realize that my feelings are futile, but it’s hard to be around the most kind, loyal, protective, beautiful man and not get attached.

i sigh, realizing i have gotten caught up in my own head again. when i look back up at him i see him with a sad smile.

“what’s wrong?” i ask.

“it’s nothing.”

“well it’s got to be something, you’re not usually sad for no reason.”

he sighs and says, “really, it’s nothing. we should try to walk faster so we get back before eclipse.”

he starts walking faster towards the ikrans, making me jog to catch up. i grab his hand and stop walking.

“neteyam, please, don’t keep stuff from me. we are best friends, and when we first became friends you promised to always tell me what’s bothering you.”

“stop digging y/n, i don’t want to talk about it right now. i just want us to laugh and talk like usual right now.”

“just tell me so that i can help you and we can go back to normal.”

“i don’t want to talk about it.”

“nete please-“

“fucking stop y/n, i’m not going going to talk about this with you.”

i stand there shocked, not used to him getting angry. he walks off and i follow after him, confused as to why he’s so mad. i know i shouldn’t have pushed but it’s not like him to be so sad.

when we get back to the ikrans lo’ak and spider immediately notice that something’s off, seeing the look on neteyam’s face. when spider and lo’ak look to me i shrug and shake my head. it’s awkwardly silent before neteyam clears his throat and says, “ y/n, how about you ride with lo’ak and spider rides with me tonight.”

lo’ak and spider both whip around and look to me, about to complain about how it’s never been this way when i just shake my head. spider raises an eyebrow at me but walks over to neteyams ikran anyways. i walk to lo’aks, waiting for his to grab me by the waist to help me but he doesn’t. i climb up, and go to hold onto his waist, but i stop and hold his shoulders.

neteyam and spider take off first, lo’ak and i soon after. we sit in science for a little before he asks, “so what happened?”

i sigh, “he just seemed off. he’s been more distant and sad lately, but i guess that’s just a journey of him becoming a man.”

“yeah well he has been stressed out about the whole ‘becoming a man and choosing a mate’ thing. it’s not like there’s not 20 girls that would die for him to stick it in them,” he snickers.

“ew come on lo’ak that’s disgusting.”

“i mean, i know who im choosing when i become a man.”

“the hottest girl who wants me, duh cuz. i mean that’s skxawng has always been picky, but now it seems like he’s trying to always want what he can’t have.”

“what do you mean?”

“come on cuz, you can’t be that blind. did you notice when he started getting all whiny earlier?”

“no? i mean after we talked i guess?”

“and we talked about what...”

i pause, trying to remember.

“ummmmm we talked about how you wanted to bang that girl we saw that was healing you and neteyam’s dumb asses, we talked about how spider is never going to find a na’vi that wants his tiny ass but let’s be honest, him and kiri totally have something going-“

“no you fucking skxawng we talked about humans and na’vi, then neteyam got all whiny and shit.”

i pause, “so?”

“so who is the human that neteyam spends all his time with?”

i stop.

“you’re saying that neteyam likes me?”

“YES THATS WHAT IVE BEEN SAYING AND YOU CLEARLY LIKE HIM TOO”

i blush and laugh, “ lo’ak, there’s no way he likes me. you said it yourself, he was like 30 hot girls lined up for him.”

“he totally does like you-“

“he totally doesn’t-“

“but you like him anyways. that’s the point, it doesn’t matter if you believe me or not because we all know that you two like each other.”

we ride back home in silence, i think about what he has said. could it neteyam actually like me too? is that why he didn’t want to talk about it with me? i wonder what would even happen if he did, it’s not like we could mate.

when we land at home, i get of lo’aks ikran and thank him for telling me. i walk to my tent and lay down, thinking about how this could change everything. i should probably talk to neteyam about it instead of just mulling it over by myself.

i decide to get up and go talk to him, even though i’m scared that lo’ak could be wrong. i mean, what if i talk to him about it and tell him i like him when he doesn’t even like me back? i stand by his family’s tent, not sure if i should go it on not.

while i’m standing there thinking, i don’t notice that neteyam walked up behind me. he taps me on the shoulder and when i turn around i see that it’s him.

“hi.”

“hey?” he says, nervously scratching his neck.

“i think we need to talk, i was about to go in and ask for you.”

“i told you i don’t want to talk about it-“

“lo’ak told me you have a crush on me.”

he stares down at me with wide eyes. i can see his cheeks turn purple as he blushes and he opens and closes his mouth, trying to say something. i grab his hand, my small one grabbing on to 3 of his fingers. i walk us over to my tent, thankfully lo’ak must have gotten spider to stay away for a little.

when we go inside my tent, neteyam looks so nervous that you would think i’m trying to shoot him. he starts rambling, “ listen i don’t know why lo’ak would tell you that because i don’t have a crush on you i mean, you’re my bestfriend that would be kind of weird right? i mean not to say that you’re not funny or pretty, because you definitely are but even if i did like you, i mean how would that even work, i’m na’vi and you’re human and we probably would even be able to kiss because of your exopack and-“

i cut him off, “neteyam, i like you.”

“you do?”

“yeah, i do.”

“but why me, why not lo’ak? or anyone else?”

i look at the floor, “because i don’t want lo’ak. i want you. i want your smile and how funny you are. i want to talk to you and go on your ikran with you. you understand me like no one else. i see you nete.”

i feel a his hand on my chin, guiding me to look up at him. he hugs me, my forehead on his chest.

“i see you y/n,” he says, kissing the top of my head.

[peeweekey]

everyone adores you (at least i do)

pairing: sam x reader

wc: 1.1k

tags: CHEEEEESY cheesy cheesy puppy love, mutual pining, sam is PATHETICALLY down bad, pre-relationship, abigail and sebastian mentioned, friends to lovers

synopsis: if it were up to sam, he'd spend every second of everyday at your side.

a/n: in all of my other sam fics, its reader embarrassingly in love with him...he gets a taste of his own medicine here lol!

With vanilla ice cream melting and dripping down your fingertips, coarse sand underneath you and the salty ocean waves lapping at your feet; you are a child again, sitting with your grandpa at the docks, watching as he reeled in a ‘big one’. Filling his bucket with loads and loads of fish.

Those days are far gone now, but the memory remains, as clear as the day you remember it. The feeling is nostalgic, sleepy in the way your senses are dulled by syrupy thick contentment. Beaches at sunset have that effect on you, you suppose. 

“This is fun,” Sam says, tone lacking its boisterous loudness, you almost don’t hear it over the sound of crashing waves. “I had a lot of fun today, farmer.”

Your eyes flicker to him, his green gaze dead-set on the peachy golden sky, the taste of sea salt mingling with sweet ice cream heavy in your tongue. The sea breeze is cold, whipping against your face and running through your hair.

“I did too,” you agree. “Y’know, I don’t get a lot of off time with the farm and stuff. This is a nice change of pace.”

He smiles, that sunshine smile you’ve come to associate with Sam. “I caught you at just the right time then, huh?” 

You shrug, your own smile mirroring his. “Auspicious.” He did.

The sun is setting, the day is coming to a close yet Sam wishes it wouldn’t, silently pleading with any higher being to somehow stretch time. He is barely a religious person, but the weight of his want is enough to transcend his own beliefs. Every second with you barely feels like enough; like sand slipping through his fingers.

One thing’s for certain, Sam isn’t going to just let it end here.

“We should hang out like this again,” Sam says, a little hurriedly, captured all in one breath. Shy and tentative, like a bashful child with a school crush. “Uh, I mean, do you? Wanna? Hang out with me?”

You can barely suppress a delighted chuckle from slipping past your lips, your chest warming with fond affection. “I’d be more than happy to. Yoba knows I need a break or two or I’ll actually explode,” you huff while Sam hums in agreement. “We can even invite Abigail and Sebastian… so can demo that new song for me, I see you all working very hard when I visit sometimes.”

He should be happy to hear that; that you’d be more than happy to spend your precious off time with him out of all people. You and him, him and you, Sam and the farmer. Your name connected to his with ‘and’, it makes him giddy, causes his cheeks pinken and pinken. 

Just the two of you, though. Sure, he loves his friends, Abby and Seb have been with him since day one. But it feels out of place—

(Sam, Sebastian, Abigail and the farmer doesn’t have that ring to it…)

“Yeah, I—I dunno, it’s just…”

The unfiltered truth is stupid, at least to him. Vincent is far too young for some of the things Sam longs to say. There’s a reason Abby and Seb hang out under his nose, he won’t blame them, they have their own secrets he isn’t privy to—too serious, too dull for him.

(And now with you, he thinks you might just be the one he can share his own secrets with. Because even he has his own serious, dull thoughts. Thoughts that he doesn’t want brushed away with a snarky remark or a sarcastic laugh.)

“I kinda like that it’s just the two of us?” 

His voice sounds unsteady, squeaky. Trailing off at the end, lost in the sound of water crashing at your feet. Phrasing his statement into a question that you could deny, that you could easily brush off—because if you did, he would too. 

(It would be a bummer if you did though, but Sam is cool with that, chill with any decision you make. Really, he totally is.)

You grin, bumping your shoulder against his, your ice cream is dripping down, down, down your knuckles. Once your skin meets his, you don’t pull away, you press closer and closer to his side. Leaning your head against his sunburnt shoulder—but he barely registers the sting—and your arm against his own. It’s a pleasant weight, having you against him—grounding and tethering him to you.

“I do too. Like it, I mean. I think I get to see so many other sides to you, Sam. Without the others and all that.”

Sam feels his breath hitch, his cheeks flush even pinker even with the sunburns. “Woah, phew, I mean—awesome… When, when do you think we can meet next?”

You tilt your head, running calculations through your mind. You’re very busy on that farm, he knows; but Sam can’t help but keep his hopes up, you’re fun company. Maybe the best he’s had yet.

“I know I won’t have enough time until my melons are ready for harvesting—and don’t you dare try making a joke about that,” you smile, wide and cheeky. Right as Sam readies an innuendo at the tip of his tongue; it makes his blood pump faster and his breathing stutters at the thought of you knowing him so well. 

“So how about this?” you propose slowly. “We spend one day every month doing all the stuff we wanna do, together. just you and me—fun right? I’ll even sleep a little earlier the night before.”

Sam bites into his ice cream—chocolate and your treat, at your insistence—though he isn’t quite sure if the immediate smile on his lips is due to its sweetness, or yours.

He leans closer into you, resting his head on top of yours, strands of your hair tickling his lips. Lowering his voice into a whisper so only you can hear.

(The secret is that you make Sam want. Want, want, want like he’ll never get sick of it. He hoards these stolen moments with you so greedily yet wants more.)

“…two days, two days each month.”

He feels your body shake with the strength of your laughter, warmth swirls all throughout his body, tingling wherever your body brushes against his own. Sam finds that he likes the feeling, the buzz of it—it’s addicting.

“Yeah, alright then,” you reply, mirth dripping from each and every word. “two days. We have a deal. Better?”

“Yeah,” he turns back to face the water, the ocean spray misting his face. “Yeah, a lot better. That does sound fun.”

Anything sounds fun when it involves you.

[mamaestapa]

Daylight|| Jack Hughes x reader

•pairing: Jack Hughes x reader

•summary: Your best friend makes you realize that love is golden, and not black and white like you always thought it was

•warnings: best friends to lovers, slight angst, smut (fingering I DIDN'T EXPECT IT GO THIS WAY BUT I HAD AN IDEA AND RAN WITH IT OK), but mostly fluff!

taylor swift song imagines masterlist

————————————————

You walked into your apartment in Jersey, the air tense as soon as your boyfriend of two years slammed the door.

"You were flirting with him."

You closed your eyes as you sighed deeply. Here we go...

"Ryan, I wasn't-."

"Don't lie to me. I saw what I saw."

You rolled your eyes at your boyfriends accusations. This was the second night in a row he's decided to pick a fight with you over your friendship with Jack. Pair that with the two other fights he's started this month, it's safe to say yours and Ryans relationship has been quite rocky recently.

"Ryan," you said, turning around to face him, "I don't know what you think you saw. I was not flirting with Jack."

"Yes you were, Y/n!" He snapped, the slight raise in his voice making you jump slightly. He never raised his voice at you, only when it came to Jack. Ryan has always been wary of yours and Jack's friendship. He refused to let you hang out with Jack by yourself, and he always had to know if Jack was going to be there whenever the two of you went out it with a group. It's safe to say that Ryan has never trusted Jack. He has no reason not to trust the middle Hughes brother, he just simply doesn't because of how close the two of you are. When you first started dating Ryan, he made you un-add Jack on both Snapchat and Instagram. You didn't think much of it at first, but it only got worse from there. Which brings you to tonight.

You and Ryan met up with some of your mutual friends at a local bar for a casual night of drinking and catching up. While you were there, Jack and his best friend Trevor, who was in town for a game against the Devils, showed up and joined your group. You hadn't seen neither Jack nor Trevor in weeks, wanting to respect your boyfriends wishes to keep your distance from your friends. The night was going well, everyone was having fun and knocking back as many drinks as they could handle. After about three shots of Malibu and a vodka cranberry, you were pretty tipsy and your judgement was clouded. You ended up spending the rest of the night talking to and catching up with Jack. You talked about the current hockey season and your new job. It felt so natural talking and laughing along with Jack. Maybe it had to do with your past relationship...

A small smile pulled at your lips as you thought about your interactions with Jack at the bar. Ok, maybe you were flirting with him. But Ryan didn't need to know that.

"What makes you think I was flirting with him?" You asked as you crossed your arms over your chest. Ryan rolled his eyes, giving you a look of annoyance.

"Oh I don't know," he said sarcastically, "maybe by the way you were touching him." You scoffed, "Way I was touching him?"

"Your hand never once left his thigh or bicep."

"I was just being nice!"

"Yeah because gripping his body is nice, Y/n!" He seethed, glaring at you with an incredulous look. You rolled your eyes once again, this time making sure he could see them.

"Oh don't start that shit with me, hon." Ryan said, voice rising as he shook his head at you. He moved closer to you, bringing his hand up to run through his blonde hair. However, he did it in such a way that made you think he was going to put his hands on you. You instantly flinched, backing away from your boyfriend as tears welled in your eyes. Ryan narrowed his eyes at you, confused at your sudden movements. His gaze softened as he realized why you backed away from him so suddenly.

"Y/n, baby," Ryan pleaded as he tried to reach out for you, "you know I'd never-."

"No," you said sternly as tears threatened to fall. You backed away from him even more, "I can't do this anymore. We're done, Ryan."

You made your way to the front door, ignoring your now ex-boyfriends pathetic pleas and apologies as you exited the apartment, and texted the person that started this fight in the first place.

~time skip~

Jack was sitting on his couch watching Shameless when his phone went off with a text from you. All it said was: "I'm coming over." He was getting ready to get a glass of water from the kitchen when he heard a knock at his front door. He set the glass on the counter, quickly making his way to the door. He didn't know what to expect when he opened the door, so he took a deep breath before reaching for the handle and opening it.

There you stood, standing in his doorway with red eyes and tear stained cheeks. Jacks heart dropped as he took in your distressed appearance.

"Oh sweetheart," he cooed softly, "what happened?"

"Ryan," you croaked, "Ryan happened."

Jack frowned and wrapped his arms around your body, bringing you into his apartment. Of course it was Ryan that had you feeling like this. Jack never did like him. He thought he was a douchebag with zero good intentions. Jack could treat you so much better than him...

Jack led you over to his couch, keeping an arm around your body as he sat you both down. As soon as you felt the soft white cushion beneath you, you burst into tears. Jack felt his heart break as the sounds of your harsh sobs filled his silent apartment. He adjusted his hold on you, wrapping both his arms around you and pulling you into a tight embrace. You wrapped your arms around Jack as sobs wracked your body.

"Shh," he shushed gently, stroking your back as he spoke, "It's OK. You're OK."

You let out another harsh sob as more tears poured down your cheeks and splashed onto Jack's red New Jersey Devils t-shirt. He continued to console you, murmuring sweet nothings as his hands continued to gently stroke your back. You hadn't told him what happened with Ryan, but based on how you were reacting, he knew it couldn't have been good.

After a few minutes, your sobs eventually died down to the occasional hiccup. Once you were calmed down enough, Jack decided to ask you about what happened with Ryan.

"Y/n," he said softly, "You don't have to tell me, but I think it might help. What happened tonight?"

You let out a shaky breath as you lifted your head up from Jack's chest. You sniffled and wiped the remaining tears off of your cheeks before looking up at your best friend with a pained look on your face. Jacks frown deepened as his eyes scanned over your features. It hurt his heart to see your beautiful face blotchy and wet with tears from your cruel boyfriend. You sniffled once again and sighed deeply as you tried to find the right words for Jack.

"We had a fight," you started, voice quiet, "a bad one. He got upset, raised his voice, accused me of flirting with you the whole night, you know the usual."

Jack couldn't help but chuckle at that. Ryan accusing you of flirting with him was the usual?

"What do you mean the usual?"

Jack's question made you tense up. Oops.

"Yeah you know," you laughed lightly, "he always thought I'd rather be with you than him." Jack raised his eyebrows at your statement, "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah..." you trailed off. Jack didn't reply, he just looked at you, noticing the color rising to your cheeks. You were growing flustered as your mind wandered. You totally forgot about Ryan, instead having thoughts you shouldn't be having about your best friend...

Jack broke the silence a few minutes later with a question you weren't expecting.

"Would you rather be with me?"

Your heart dropped to the pit of your stomach as your breath hitched in the back of your throat. You always did have feelings for Jack, but you never thought he felt the same way about you. After all, you ended your fling two years ago with each other because your friendship was "too important to lose."

"I..." you stammered. You were at a total loss for words. Jack's gaze softened as he reached out to gently cup your cheek. Before you knew it, the two of you were leaning in, eyes fluttering closed as your lips pressed against each others. The butterflies swarmed in your belly as your lips moved in a perfect slow and sensual rhythm with Jacks. You pulled away from Jack, letting your forehead rest against his as you looked into his blue eyes.

"I love you." You said quietly, your confession making Jacks face light up.

"I love you too, Y/n."

You smiled softly at him, leaning in for another kiss, one that was much deeper and full of even more passion. You knew exactly what this was going to lead to...

~time skip~

You bit your lip at the sight in front of you. Jack stood in front of you clad in black boxers. His thick thighs on display now that his sweatpants were off, and his broad chest, defined abdomen and muscular arms looked absolutely divine in the lighting of his bedroom.

"Like what you see sweetheart?"

Your cheeks grew red, the pet name making you feel your pulse in other areas of your body. Jack chuckled as he took a few steps closer to you. You laid back on the bed, propping yourself up on your elbows as he passionately kissed you. Jack gently pushed you down on the bed, his lips still attached to yours. You wrapped your arms around him, letting your manicured nails softly trail down his bare back. He pulled back from you, looking at you with his lust filled eyes. You eyed Jack as you hooked your index finger under the waistband of your thong, pulling the lace material down your legs. Jack glanced down, a smirk on his face as he saw your glistening folds.

"You're so wet and I haven't even touched you yet," he smugly stated.

You whined at his words, your hands reaching out to grasp his biceps. He leaned down and smashed his lips against yours, both of your mouths moving in sync. He pulled away, his blue eyes soft but full of so much lust.

"I want to touch you Y/n."

"Please..." you whined.

As soon as you gave him permission, Jack brought his hand down to your right thigh, stroking the soft skin of your inner thigh. Your eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of his hands on your skin. His fingers hovered over your clit, making you squirm with anticipation. He placed one finger into your entrance as he circled your sensitive clit. You gasped at the feeling, beginning to buck your hips beneath his touch. He pushed your hips down with his other hand, pressing onto your lower belly to hold you still.

"You gotta stay still for me."

You just nodded, arching your back slightly as Jack started to pump his fingers in and out, rhythmically.

"Hmph-Jack." you moaned out. You were completely taken over by a feeling of bliss, feeling yourself grow closer and closer to your orgasm.

He smirked at you as you grabbed onto his forearm, digging your nails into his skin as his muscles flexed with each swift movement of his fingers.

"Jack," you breathed out, "I'm so close-uh."

He thrusted his fingers into you one more time before pulling them out which caused you to whine. Jack eyed you carefully as he brought his fingers up to his mouth, sucking your juices off of them. He slowly removed his index finger from his mouth with a pop. You bit your lip as you watched him clean his fingers off. Only Jack could make eating cum look sexy. Jack chuckled at your reaction as he disappeared into his bathroom. He came back out with a wet wash cloth to clean you off with and one of his t-shirts for you to wear. Jack pressed the warm cloth to your thighs and core, wiping up the remnants of your orgasm. After cleaning you up, he slipped the t-shirt on over your head. The sight of you in his shirt made Jack's heart swell with love. He didn't want to look at anything else now that he saw you in his clothes.

Jack climbed into bed next to you, your bodies immediately turning into each others. All of you, all of him, intertwined. It just felt right for both you and Jack to be wrapped up in the others embrace. You hummed contently as you laid your head against Jacks chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat.

"You know," you spoke up softly, making Jack hum in response.

"Ryan used to make me believe love was black and white," you craned your neck up to look Jack in the eyes. You placed a soft kiss to his lips, a wide grin appearing on both of your faces as you finished your thought.

"You made me realize it's golden."

hi loves!!

here’s the first taylor swift song imagine! i decided to do these at random and not in order because that’s just what i prefer to do. i put all of the songs into wheel decide and daylight was the one that was chosen first lol (which i’m not complaining because i LOVE jack🤭)

also- i didnt plan on this being smutty at all, BUT, i got an idea (all thanks to @emaanemaa hehe) and i just went with it. i actually like how it turned out though, its the perfect mix of angst fluff and smut ;)

i hope you all enjoyed this! this was my first time writing for jack so i hope it was good enough for all of you jack girlies out there🤍

as always, thank you for all of your love and support! it means so much to me. i also really appreciate you all being patient with me when it comes to updates. i know they’re super slow, and i know you’re waiting so long for me to write something, ANYTHING, but your patience means a lot🤍🤍

love you all! thank you for reading!

[vsaintsin]

Writeblr Re-Intro

Yo! I'm V Saintsin. Or V or Vin or Saintsin or whatever you want to call me that sounds right on your tongue. I'm a self-proclaimed Social Media fumbler who got a late start to the party and has never quite figured it out. I hate how hipster and edgy it sounds to say "I'm bad at social media" but like I used to work with some people who actually managed the social media accounts for the business we worked for and there were rules and whatnot and damn, I think online media is just not my medium. That being said, here I am! Hah

I'm an author and general mess who's hoping to be the miracle man (somebody who makes a living writing silly little stories). I do use a pseudonym but please hear me out when I say I didn't realize how edgy it sounds, it just has some sentimental value to my personal life. I'm so sorry that I sound like I'm in my emo phase HAHA

About me -

He/Him Transguy from the American Midwest (arguably the south, depending on who you talk to, but the older people still say "Sodi-pop" and "ope").

I'm dysautonomic, bendy, permanently sleepy, and a survivor of Crappy Doctors Who Suck At Doctoring.

I like DnD, Pathfinder, Baldur's Gate 3, Cyberpunk, Dragon Age, and other things in that vein.

I do make art of my stories and characters (Tablet is currently not working so I'm in a dry spell).

My writing background is predominantly ancient, dusty RPs from as far back as the foopets days and fanfic writing on Quizilla - I am an old and wizened elder of the net.

My formal education was music performance and behavioral neuroscience, I don't really know how I got where I am.

This is not my first rodeo with tumblr but it is the first time I have anything to SAY instead of just lurking.

In the event of malfunction, you can put me outside for 5 minutes and I'll probably factory reset.

My existence as I know it hinges on a massive number of sticky notes plastered throughout my room.

What I'm lookin' for -

Idk, whatever? I'm down for most things. Did you write it? Cool, let me see. I'm not too bent on genre or anything, just fascinated by the art of storytelling.

A bit tentative with fanfiction but that's just because if it's not a fandom I'm familiar with I am rather clueless about what the hell is going on and if it's a fandom I am familiar with I HUNT DOWN THE DEEP LORE.

I like art a whole lot, including fanart. Also art advice, love seeing things from different perspectives and learning something new.

Mutuals, really, for any reason. Building better connections on here, getting to know people. I am hideously bad at this but I try.

What I write -

Science Fiction with heavy subjects that matter to me - trigger warnings on a story-by-story basis.

High Fantasy (eventually books I think?) characters and their backgrounds for DnD and Pathfinder - I have been tempted to share these to help people get ideas or just for free use?

Things that I delete because I have crippling imposter syndrome and publishing makes me nauseous (doin' it tho).

Stories that I hope will make people feel less alone or that people could relate to, stories that I wish I had when life was worse and I was reaching out for anything I could find to keep me afloat, stories that try to be critical of things that SUCK in a way that's any helpful.

Lots of curse words and cussing (that's just how people talk 'round here), dubious science, things that I hope might make you cry but in a good way though.

Character-Driven stories that revolve more around the development of the person and less around the plot itself if that makes sense.

I've put blurb things below for my primary project/series which features a grumpy, queer, 37-year old chain smoking Frenchman and his misadventures with life and love and unbridled rage. If any of that sounds cool stick around and hang out? (This part is a plug bc I did a thing and I'm proud of it) And if my books sounds interesting the first one is 99 cents on Kindle and you just need a phone and a free app to read it!

THE SECRET OF LIFE (Published) - Sci-Fi/Psychological Thriller, Bi M Lead, Lovers to Enemies, AI but the oldschool cool kind not the real world thing that's stealing our future

Carlisle-Trystan Antoinette is a mercenary on a hard road, navigating life and death itself in an infinite cycle started by powers above his understanding. He has one mission - warn The Dianican Space Station of the coming threat and put a stop to a war that would encapsulate the whole of the Sol System before it can ever begin. Unfortunately for Carlisle, reality is a tenuous thing, made up only by our understanding of it. At least, according to his Psychiatrist, who tells him that there is no war, that he was never a mercenary, and that what Carlisle is experiencing is a severe but manageable psychotic break. Stripped of his combat enhancements, his bio monitor, and everything he's every known, Carlisle has a decision to make. Does he give in to the thoughts and memories, so real that he can almost taste them, or does he live a life of comfort and ease, returning to a husband and daughter that he left behind?

TWs: Domestic and War Violence, suicide, rape, medical trauma, grief, drug use

THE SILENCE OF ANGELS (Due 2024, TSoL 2) - Betrayal and Rage, Learning how to love again slow-burn romantic subplot, Learning how to Dad, A general inability for any one thing to just go right

(Quick Rough Blurb that offers no spoilers for TSoL) Making connections isn't easy for somebody who's accustomed to burning bridges. Isolation has always been Carlisle's mantra for surviving his life. Playing a role comes second nature, pretending to be the man that everyone else wants to see in him. When an old friend is murdered Carlisle finds himself as the primary suspect with all evidence pointing to him so clearly that even he calls to question what he is capable of. Unwilling to believe that he could commit such a heinous crime, Carlisle sets off to find the truth of his friend's death - was Carlisle framed or does he truly have the capacity to bring such harm upon those he loves? Old and new bonds will be tested, faith broken, and the future of everyone called into question as lines are drawn and sides are picked.

TWs: Violence, mentions of SA, graphic character death, more grief, more death

I don't know what else to say... Later!

[swanimagines]

Hi, Can I get C41 with Jerome Valeska, thanks!

Prompt: C41. “Fuck you! Get out of my house!”

EFFORT

Living in Gotham had never been easy, and some of your friends wondered why you would stay there despite all the crime, corruption, and being in some level of danger every day. You knew it might have sounded crazy, and it probably was — but you still thought of Gotham as your home, as flawed as it was.

This particular night had been a long day at work, and your boss had set you free two hours past your regular work time. He had done that a lot lately, whipping his workers to the edge, threatening to fire you if you dared to complain. So when you got home and kicked your shoes off and hung your coat into the closet, you felt at peace for the first time for hours.

You went straight to the kitchen and opened the fridge and took out the lemonade jug you had had sitting there for a few days now, sniffing it before shrugging - good enough. You poured it into the glass, adding some ice before chucking the lemonade down your dry throat. You let out a breath after swallowing, and watched the lights sprawling through your home street.

“Rough day, doll?” a voice drawled from the darkness of your living room, and you spun around, throwing the glass before even looking at the intruder — you knew exactly who it was. That fiery-haired boy had been following you for weeks, enough for you to see nightmares with his voice. You’d recognise it from anywhere.

And sure enough, it was him. He dodged the glass easily as it hurled into the wall behind him. He lounged on your couch, clearly anticipating you throwing something but he laughed anyway. “Woah, you have an odd way to greet your guests.”

“Jerome,” you growled, lifting the lemonade jug for protection. “What are you doing here?”

He stood up, smoothing out his jacket. “I saw your boss shouting at you today. Not very nice of him. I’m planning to give him a talk later, but I first wanted to check on you.”

“Fuck you! Get out of my house!” you shouted, waving the lemonade jug at him.

He pouted at you. “Am I really that unwelcome here? But I made all this effort to find you, to get into your apartment — I could get used to hanging out here occasionally, if you let me.”

You ignored it, turning to your bag for your phone, but Jerome reached you with a few quick strides, taking a hold of your wrist and pried the lemonade jug away from you, placing it on the counter. “Ah, ah, ah. Let’s not make this difficult. We could have so much fun, you wouldn’t want the police involved in our fun, would you?”

You tried to pull your wrist off his hold, but he just tightened his hold. You took a step closer to him. “Let me go, or I will make sure your balls will never again function.”

He tilted his head. “I just want to get to know you better.”

You tried to struggle yourself free as you seethed, “The feeling isn’t mutual.”

His smile disappeared for a moment. “That’s not very nice to say. I’ve been watching you for weeks. I know every little quirk and habit of yours. Doesn’t my effort mean anything to you?”

“You’re sick.”

His grip tightened again for a moment before he slowly let go, and you pulled your hand back as soon as his grip loosened enough, rubbing the red marks he left on you. He stepped back and sighed. “You know, you aren’t the first person to tell me that, and won’t be the last either.”

You took one more step further from him, your spine colliding with your kitchen counter. “What do you want from me? Why me?”

His grin returned immediately, trapping you in between himself and the counter. At that moment, you wished you would have been one of the people they experimented with in Arkham, that you could just… melt through the floor to escape, or something like that. He lifted his hand, caressing your cheek. “Isn’t it obvious? I want to study you. I want to learn what makes you tick. Why aren’t you like the others, others are boring but you… you’re like a puzzle. And I love puzzles.”

Your gaze jumped around the kitchen as you tried to make up a way to get past him. The kitchen knife was tucked away with your cutting board next to the sink, and your phone was still in your bag over your shoulder, but with Jerome so close that you could almost feel his breath… not a chance.

“S-stay away from me,” you stuttered out, grimacing internally at your attempt to sound brave. “I-I mean it, I’m, I’m going to get you locked up, I…”

He pouted again, cupping your chin. “Oh, doll. It’s cute how innocent you are sometimes, do you really think the police will find me? Or if they even bother looking properly just for you? Have you forgotten where you live?”

You swallowed, knowing he was right. The police wouldn’t have time to protect you like that, you weren’t important in any way.

“My friends will notice if I disappear,” you squeaked out, and he hummed.

“That’s the best part of it. The thrill of being chased. But don’t worry doll, I’m not here to take you away. Not tonight, anyway.” He took a step back again, and looked around. “But I see you’re in no mood of company today, so I'd better get going. Your boss waits for me anyway, that warehouse is cozy for me but for my guests, it’s… less cozy.”

He walked to the door, and you stared at him as he went. You finally found a piece of courage, and asked, “What are you going to do with him?”

He turned to you slightly, raising his eyebrows. “Your boss? Well, let’s just say… he may not come to work tomorrow. Or ever, depending on my mood. Don’t be too surprised if that happens, he needs to learn that my doll deserves some respect.”

Your heart jumped, and before you even had time to consider it, you took two steps towards him. “Jerome, I may lose my job if you kill him. And I can’t pay my rent, or bills, or food if that happens.”

He looked at you, and smirked. “Leave all that up to me. Just sit tight, all of your worries will be gone by tomorrow.”

Before you could reply, he was out, his steps echoing in your stairwell — and even when you knew it was wrong, you were unable to dash after him and plead with him to not kill your boss. You just stood there frozen and only went back inside when you heard the stairwell door close. You closed your door with a soft click and leaned against it, taking in deep breaths.

You knew you should call the police. Or even one of your friends. Tell someone. You knew it, but yet you just stood there like an idiot. A thought that filled your head, that you should just let him do it. It was true that your boss was being unfair, forcing you to work like slaves. Overtime without bonuses, knowing his workers wouldn’t be able to afford to get fired. And his superiors didn’t care about it. As long as money was pouring in, your boss was allowed to do whatever he wanted.

So maybe… this was a way out. Maybe you should just let Jerome do what he will to the boss. And it wasn’t like you knew which warehouse he was talking about, there were hundreds in Gotham. You could just pretend to be shocked when the news rang out about what happened.

You knew it was still wrong, and it may be that this was exactly what Jerome was after, but you couldn’t help it, the feeling of finding a way out.

So, you closed your eyes for a moment before you straightened up and made your way to the couch, moving it to clean the shattered glass from the floor — and you found yourself being intrigued about his next visit, even when you tried to shoo yourself from thinking about it.

---

Requests are open! FANDOM LIST | PROMPT LIST(S) | RULES (READ!!!)

[btsficsandsuch]

I Wanted to be Romantic

Yoongi begs you to help him contact his ex girlfriend. At first you agree but then you quickly realize that was a mistake, for both you and Yoongi.

Loosely based on Silver Linings Playbook

——————————————————————————

You were currently hanging out with some of your friends. Your best friend Rachel was there and she brought along one of her friends, Mina. You had hung out with Mina a few times but it was only because of the mutual friendship with Rachel. Mina started talking about her ex boyfriend Yoongi and how he had caught her cheating on him so they broke up but now he keeps trying to contact her because he wants to get back together. In her words “she’s so over him so it’s not going to happen.” You were surprised at how she was so nonchalant about the whole situation. You had met Yoongi a couple times too and he seemed like a really nice guy. You felt bad for him. The two of them were heading to a bar to grab a few drinks after dinner but you decided to head home instead. You were starting your new job in the morning, a stylist for the group BTS.

The next day you got yourself ready and made your way over to the set location. The boys were filming a new music video. The lead stylist handed you a package of clothes and told you to head over to Yoongi to help him get ready. You found him sitting in the corner looking very dejected. You felt terrible for him, but you decided to just be professional and not say anything about the Mina situation. You figured he won’t even recognize you anyways.

You walked over and introduced yourself, but he just looked at you with empty eyes. You handed him the clothes and waited for him to return so that you could work on the accessories. After a few minutes he made his way back to you. You were trying to cheer him up by making random jokes and just trying to be as upbeat as you could but nothing seemed to really work. While you were adjusting his shirt he suddenly spoke, “Y/N you look really familiar. Do I know you from somewhere?” You were unsure how to proceed. Should you tell him the truth or just lie to avoid any awkwardness? Figuring he had been lied to enough you answered, “Umm I’ve hung out with Mina a few times. We have a mutual friend in Rachel.” You cringed when you saw his face drop.

He looked at you with big eyes, “How is she? I’ve been trying to contact her but she won’t call me back. I just want to talk things over. I wish I could get a letter to her or something.” You felt so terrible looking at him. He looked so depressed and you just wanted to do anything to make him feel better. You cleared your throat, “I could give a letter to Mina. I see her occasionally when we hang out with Rachel.” Yoongi’s eyes lit up and he jumped up engulfing you in a big hug, “Really? Thank you so much Y/N! I’ll give you the letter tomorrow at the company building.” With that he left to begin shooting the video. You were happy to see that he now seemed to be a little less upset but you were worried about what you’d gotten yourself in to.

The next day Yoongi came running up to you in the hallway, “Y/N here is the letter for Mina. Thank you again. You have no idea how much you’re helping me.” You just smiled, “Of course. It’s not a problem. I think I’m hanging out with her next week.” He gave you another hug before running off.

You spent the next few days working with the boys, talking over what kind of looks they wanted to go for during the big charity concert coming up and taking measurements and things like that. You and Yoongi had started spending quite a bit of time together. You mentioned that you had always been interested in music so he offered to let you in his studio to watch him while he worked on some stuff. He said it was the least he could do. He was so sweet. Always asking if you were comfortable or offering to get you some water. He even ordered dinner for you two one night. Not to mention he had the cutest smile you’d ever seen. You didn’t understand how Mina could cheat on him and lose someone so great.

Today was the day you were hanging out with Rachel and Mina. You were meeting up at Rachel’s apartment to watch a movie. You placed the letter from Yoongi in your bag and grabbed the bottle of wine you were taking as a gift and made your way over there. The movie ended up being more boring than the three of you had thought which led to gossiping instead. Rachel turned to Mina, “So have you heard from Yoongi recently?” You could feel your heart stop as you thought about the letter you were supposed to hand over before you left for the evening. Mina shook her head, “No I think he finally got the hint thankfully. I want nothing to do with him.” You wanted to smack her. This poor guy was devastated and she was annoyed at him. Rachel then turned her attention to you, “Y/N aren’t you working for the same company now? You’re a stylist right? Have you seen Yoongi?” You nodded your head, “Yeah I’ve met him a few times. He seems very nice.”You didn’t want to go into a lot of details. Your blood started to boil again when Mina started laughing and said, “Yeah that was the problem. He was just so boring and plain ya know? He just wanted to cuddle and watch movies and stuff like that when we were together. He said that being with me helped calm him down and made him feel relaxed. I just got tired of being his therapist. I need more excitement in my life.” You were furious and at that moment decided you weren’t going to hand over the letter. Yoongi deserved better.

When you got home that evening you pulled the letter out of your bag and set it on the table, not sure how to proceed. You remembered how excited Yoongi was when he handed it to you and you wanted to see that smile again. You knew it was wrong but you slowly opened the letter and began to read,

“Mina, I hope that you’re doing well. It’s been so long and I would do anything to be able to hear your voice again. I’ve been doing some thinking and I understand why you did what you did. I can be a lot to handle at times and you needed a break. I promise I can change and do better. Please let me show you. I’ve seen a lot of butterflies around lately. I know how much you love them. I think it’s a sign that we should work on this. Please contact me back so we can meet up. Love Yoongi.”

You scoffed at his letter. Why couldn’t he see that he deserved so much better than her? She might’ve loved him at one point but she definitely doesn’t love him now. Luckily the boys were out of the country for the next week so you didn’t have to see Yoongi and it would give you time to figure out what to do next.

You were currently in the wardrobe room working on the boys concert outfits when Yoongi came walking in. He gave you a big hug, “Hi Y/N. How have you been?” You smiled knowing his true intentions were to find out about Mina but being polite you answered, “Good. How was your week out of the country?” He let out a small sigh, “Tiring. Soooo were you able to give the letter to Mina?” Walking over to your bag you pulled out a letter, “Yeah she actually gave me this to give to you.” He snatched the letter out of your hands ripping it open. He began reading out loud,

“Yoongi, I hope that you’re doing well. I’m sorry that I haven’t been contacting you recently. I’ve got a lot on my mind. I think we need to take some time to figure things out. We need to figure out how we can repair our relationship and move forward. If it’s me looking at the butterflies as signs I wouldn’t look too much into them. I don’t really believe in things like that. This isn’t the end though. Take care of yourself. Love Mina.”

Yoongi stood there reading the letter to himself over and over. You weren’t sure how he was going to react. You also weren’t sure if you had done the right thing. Maybe you should’ve just given her Yoongi’s letter and stayed out of it. You were shaken from your thoughts when Yoongi walked over and gave you a hug, “Thank you Y/N. At least I know there’s a chance now. I’m going to work on another letter to give to her.” You simply nodded and watched him walk out the door.

Over the next few weeks you and Yoongi became closer. He’d always stop in the wardrobe room to help you clean up and you’d spend the evenings in his studio while he worked on some music. One night he even invited you over to the dorms for movie night with the rest of the group. During dinner you got into a discussion with Taehyung. He had told you how he had a dream that Yeontan could talk and told him he needed a little brother and he saw it as a sign he needed another dog. You told him you didn’t really believe in “signs” and that Yeontan enjoys being the only child. Yoongi got quiet but ended up taking your side. Afterwards you were in the kitchen cleaning up while the boys were getting the movie set up. Namjoon came walking in and started helping you clean up. When the two of you finished he invited you to sit at the table with him before checking to make sure none of the other guys were on their way in.

He whispered, “Y/N I just wanted to thank you for being there for Yoongi. When he found out that Mina was cheating on him he lost it. We were all pretty worried about him. But since he’s been spending time with you he seems happier. Maybe even happier than he was with her.”

You smiled, “Of course. I really like spending time with him.” Deep down you knew the truth. At this point you wanted to be more than just friends but Yoongi still mentioned Mina constantly and how they’d work things out so you didn’t think there’d ever be any chance. You made your way to the living taking a seat next to Yoongi. You were startled when he wrapped his arm around you pulling you closer to him. You pretended not to really notice and were thankful when Jimin pressed play and the movie began to distract you.

A couple weeks had passed and it was finally the night of the big charity concert the boys were putting on. A show they’d been working on for months and it was going to be played to the biggest crowd they’ve performed in front of yet. You couldn’t help but smile at how excited they all were, especially Yoongi. This was the happiest you’d seen him. The boys were in their first outfits of the night so you were working on getting the next set ready when you felt your phone vibrating in your back pocket. Checking the message it was Rachel letting you know she was at the back door. You had told her you could get her into the sold out show using your connections. You made your way to the back entrance. You spotted her quickly and she made her way over but then you noticed something else that made your heart sink. Mina was following close behind her. You smiled at Rachel as she spoke, “Hi Y/N. Is there anyway that you could get Mina in too? We understand if you can’t but we thought it was worth a shot.” You just nodded, “Sure come with me.” You took the two of them over to security to get their backstage passes and then walked them to their seats. You let them know you had to get back to work and started walking back to the dressing room, praying that Yoongi wouldn’t notice her sitting there.

The show went great. The guys did an amazing job and the fans loved it. Everything on your end went smoothly too minus Jungkook “accidentally” ripping the buttons off of his shirt two minutes before they had to be back on stage so he had to perform the next few songs with his shirt half open. You had finally gotten everything packed up and were walking down the hall to find Rachel and Mina when you stopped suddenly, your heart sinking. There in front of you was Yoongi and Mina talking face to face. He had a big gummy smile on his face. He leaned over and kissed her cheek before wrapping her in a hug.

Your heart broke. You knew it was unlikely but deep down you had thought he was starting to get over her and maybe even falling for you. You thought about all the times he invited you into his studio or to the dorms. All the times he bought you dinner. Or the time he walked you home and took off his jacket to put around you when he noticed you shivering. It all felt like a lie and you felt dumb. He was clearly still in love with her even after how badly she hurt him.

Not wanting to witness any more you turned and sprinted for the door hoping to get home before the tears started falling. In the time it had taken you to run out of the venue Yoongi had walked over to Rachel asking where you’d gone. She let Yoongi know that she saw you running towards the door and before she could say anything else he was running after you.

You were now far enough from the venue that you felt comfortable returning to a walk instead of running. You were just enjoying the silence when you suddenly heard someone shouting your name. Turning around you saw Yoongi running towards you. He finally caught up to you out of breath. “Y/N why did you leave? I thought you were coming back to the dorms with me.” You faced away from him, “You looked like you had other plans.” You started to walk away again but he grabbed your hand and pulled you back to him.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a letter, “I wanted to give this to you.” You were furious. He was seriously going to still have you play his messenger girl when he was just talking to Mina. You shoved him away from you, “Seriously Yoongi? You were just talking to her. Give it to her yourself.”, you shouted not caring how loud you were. Yoongi held up the letter again, “Please just read it. Then you never have to speak to me again if you don’t want to.” You snatched the letter out of his hand and read it out loud,”

“Y/N” you looked up at him and he was biting his lip, a nervous habit of his. You continued reading the letter,

“Y/N, I know you wrote the letter. You were just trying to protect my feelings. Thank you for saving me from even more heartbreak. I love you. I knew it the day I met you. I’m sorry that it took me so long to come to terms with it. Stuff like that is just hard for me sometimes. Love Yoongi.,”

You looked up at him with tears in your eyes, “You knew I wrote the letter but you didn’t say anything?” Yoongi had a gummy smile, “I wanted to be romantic.” You both laughed at his attempt. At that moment he pulled you close and leaned in for a long awaited kiss.

[bvidzsoo]

Love Me Like A Rockstar (4)

ー☆ Chapter 4: Comatose

Author: bvidzsoo

Pairing: Song Mingi x female reader

ー☆ Warning: cussing, mentions of a panic attack ー☆ Word count: 8.1k ー☆ Genre: university!au, enemies to lovers!au, rockstar!au ー☆ Rating: sfw ー☆ Summary: Love. You wanted none of it. You had already been heartbroken very badly once, you didn't wish to go through that ever again. But the Universe works in intricate ways and, somehow, you found yourself webbed up in a local rockstar's life, Song Mingi. He was everything you expected him to be, yet nothing like you imagined him he would be. What happens when you find mutual understanding and have heartful conversations? Will he be able to break down your walls? Will you be able to chase away his darkness?

A/N: Hello, lovelies! The long awaited 4th chapter is here and omg I'm so sorry for the long wait! I haven't even realized it's been a month since my last update...but I had a lot of stuff to do for my University and just didn't find the time to write, but here I am now, and I'll try to update next week or after that! I promise you'll have lots of Mingi next chapter *wink wink*, but I hope after reading this chapter Yn's attitude will make more sense, and that she won't be so insufferable anymore to you all reading. Please listen to the fourth song Comatose before or while reading this chapter! Yes, I have totally made Mingi wear his waterbomb outfit in this chapter because waterbomb Mingi shall NEVER be forgotten, goodbye. Please leave feedback, I truly appreciate it! Enjoy now! I have a surprise coming next chapter, hehet^^

Taglist: @orshii @or5i @lovely-red2 @juicy-red @scarfac3 @sunaswifes-blog @voicesinmyhead-rc @teez-the-time @maru-matt @kyeos4ng

⟨Series M.list ↭ Previous Chapter⟩

♫Playlist♫

『I don't care enough to miss you

After all the shit we've been through

My heart's comatose, comatose』

The blinking of the cursor was staring back at me mockingly, a reminder that my fingers haven’t moved in the past ten minutes. No thoughts connected to the theme of my project came to mind, no matter how hard I tried and how many articles I read. My mind seemed to be blank at the moment and it seemed like it wouldn’t get any better anytime soon. To be honest, I wasn’t feeling well. And that usually reflects in my work and influences my whole mood, and even day. I thought I would have a very productive day as I got ready this morning and went to the library to finish my art assignment, however, the little kick I had, came crushing down the second Mingi decided to sit with me. Well, perhaps that one small factor wasn’t the real reason which ruined my mood and brought me to the brink of a panic attack, and the current void and emptiness I have been feeling in my chest ever since. Perhaps it was the mention of Jeong Yunho and the reminder of how little I have always meant to him. My lower lip quivered again, and I allowed myself to fall back in the chair I was sitting in, staring up at my white ceiling in desperation. Why did it have to be him? Why did it have to be Yunho again? Was the Universe having a laugh at me? What were the chances that this Song Mingi was the same Song Mingi Yunho never shut up about while we were dating? It was frustrating. It was maddening and it was…mocking. I couldn’t help but feel bitter the longer I allowed the image of Mingi and Yunho laughing, hanging out, falling all over each other, linger in my mind. Their hearts filled with joy and their time spent with endless conversations, late night trips to the convenience store, random road trips and the overall feeling of knowing that you always had one person you could rely on no matter what. What did Mingi have that I didn’t? What did Yunho see in him that he never saw in me? Why was Mingi better than me? And why…was I suddenly feeling this vial jealousy creeping up in my chest like an ugly monster, the whisper of thoughts I have always tried to push to the depths of my mind after Yunho’s sudden, but heartbreaking, departure from my life?

『Straight coats and empty cabinets

Ashes from all the mess you left

New lease without you

I confess that I'm happy you're gone』

What was it about Song Mingi that Yunho was so infatuated with? What was it with Song Mingi that everyone seemed to like and gravitate towards? All I could see was the arrogance and self-centeredness rolling off of him in waves any time he entered a room. The need to shine and be the center of attention, to be the only person anyone was able to see, to focus on. The constant smirk or grin on his lips, almost always mocking or just an awful reminder that he was better than you—it was subtle, but it was there. The mischievous glint in his eyes as he watched your every move, hiding behind a wall of emotionlessness, sharp eyes watching but not giving anything away. There was no honesty in his expressions or in his actions. But why did nobody else see that? Why was I the only one picking up on how insincere Mingi actually was? Why did nobody question what he hid behind those dark and sharp eyes? His face so often void of any emotion. And then, to further prove my confusion, the Mingi I talked to today was—why did he feel different? Everything staring from his appearance to his behavior was unlike the infuriating person I have come to know. He portrayed a calm and collected nature, albeit still mischievous as he had taken my sketchbook without my permission, yet it was so clear on his face that he didn’t have any mal intentions. What prompted him to approach me out of the blue and why did he look almost…lonely? What drew him to smile so much and so freely? It certainly couldn’t have been me; I have done everything I could to make him feel unwelcome and uncomfortable, yet he…stayed. He talked without a care in the world, almost as if he forgot I would be judging his every move and sentence. He almost looked curious of who I was, trying to make conversation in which I did not want to engage in. What was it about Yunho that made his eyes sparkle so much? Why did Yunho have so much of an influence on Mingi? Why did it have to be Mingi? Why does Yunho have to be everywhere around me even after he leaves? Does Yunho really mean that much to Mingi? Just how deep is their bond? But the most jarring thought amidst the spiraling of my mind into a place I did not wish for it to go, was a very simple one. Why do I care about Song Mingi all of a sudden? Why do all these things matter to me all of a sudden? Who is Song Mingi to me to send me into an existential crisis, into a state of nervosity, and restlessness, and so much bitterness? He’s just a guy. A guy who is very irritating, arrogant, self-centered, and a pushover. A guy who only wants attention and is superficial. A guy who forgets about you the second he’s turned his back to you. A guy who only likes you until you’re new and exciting. When you start becoming boring, what does it matter anymore? Why would he keep you around for longer? Perhaps him and Yunho have more in common than I would have thought at first.

『So used to pain that it's my remedy

Easy to hate, I gave you everything

Funny that you're the one that ran away

You left me first』

I couldn’t do this anymore, I had to stop thinking. I needed my brain to shut up, to stop torturing me more than I was already hurting. I refused to reach my breaking point again just because Mingi mentioned that Yunho was his best friend—why was I giving him so much power? Trying to snap out of it, I groaned loudly as I rubbed my eyes with the heel of my palms, sitting up straight again to try and focus for the last time on my project. I had to get this done in two days, I really couldn’t slack off anymore. So, I opened the previous tab I was reading from and scrolled up in order to start reading the article from the beginning once again, hoping that the words in it would finally stick. But despite my attempt to finally focus on the only important task at hand, the loud ping of my phone quickly pulled my attention away from it. I jumped at the loud sound and cursed silently, having forgotten to put my phone on ‘do not disturb’. My eyes snapped down to it mildly annoyed, but quickly furrowed when I realized it was a message from an unknown number. I stared at it for a few seconds, eyebrows furrowing in suspicion.

Unknown: are u coming to Outlaw tonight?

Before I could really control myself, curiosity overtook me. It must’ve been someone who knows me since they were asking about Outlaw. They must have seen me there last time.

Me: who’s this? Unknown: mingi lol

My eyebrows instantly furrowed as I stared down at the message, my stomach doing a weird flip. My fingers hovered over the screen of my phone, tempted to just quickly block his number and forget about the past ten seconds, because what the fuck? How did he even get my number? I certainly don’t remember giving it to him.

Me: wtf? how do you have my number. Unknown: wooyoung

I blinked, mind blanching for a second. Wooyoung? That made even less sense as Wooyoung and I have met just once and I have not given him my phone number. I waited for a few seconds longer, waiting for Mingi to explain further, but it never came. No small dots indicating that he was texting anything else. I groaned and looked at my pale green wall for a second, trying to collect my thoughts and not throw my phone out the window. Why did he have to have my number? Was this Mingi’s way of getting on my nerves even more? And now I had to figure out how Wooyoung got my number—oh. I tsked in disbelief, eyes zooning in on the picture of Seulgi and myself I had on display on my desk. Of course, that little bitch. Why would she ask me first before giving my phone number to a complete stranger—even if Mingi wasn’t that, I still didn’t want him to have it.

Me: whatever, i’m blocking you. Unknown: so, are you coming then? Me: no, mingi, i am not.

I rolled my eyes at Mingi’s insistency of getting an answer and blatant ignorance towards my threat of blocking him—which wasn’t as menacing as I wished for it to be. But it only took him seconds to answer, and I tried not to think about how quickly he was responding.

Unknown: ok

My eyes narrowed at his simple—and sharp—answer, fingers hovering over the keyboard to fire an insult at him if he went ahead and started leaving more messages, wanting to remind him that I was not in any shape or form curious to hear any more of his bullshit. The bitterness was quite strong in the back of my head, jealousy searing through my body—I couldn’t help it. A minute or two passed, but Mingi wasn’t typing anything else and I huffed, irritated by his antics. Why was he even asking if I would go to Outlaw? I hated it the first time—well, maybe that was a little lie—and I still hate it now, so therefore I had not one reason to go and watch him perform again. Not one particle in my body wished to hear his raspy voice accompanied by a guitar, bass, and drums. I was quite content by going to bed early tonight and forgetting about the whole day, hoping that my chest would feel less heavy in the morning and the green monster would be gone from my head. And yet, despite my better judgment, my fingers worked quickly, before my mind could even register what I was doing, and I was saving Mingi’s number. There was no desire in me to have his name in my phone under any shape, so I stopped for a second to ponder over the many options I could be calling him, such as: idiot, dumbass, jackass, prick, mr. arrogant—were sounding rather pleasing to my ears—and yet, despite the wicked grin I had on my lips, my mind seemed to settle for a simple ‘I hate him’. His number was saved in my phone without putting more thought into what I was doing, and I was placing my phone aside, attention going back to my project. Now, there was nothing in the world which could disturb me again—but then my phone rang. I groaned loudly and felt like pulling on my hair, staring at my cursed phone heatedly. I was half expecting Mingi’s number to pop-up, but thankfully it wasn’t him. That would’ve been the last straw for today, I certainly would’ve gone crazy. Instead, it was Seulgi calling and I knew she had something important to say if she wasn’t texting. I picked up, albeit with disdain.

“Hey!” She sounded cheerful, excited. Very much the opposite of my mood right now.

“Hi.” I muttered and started tapping my forefinger against my desk, staring down at the article I had opened in front of me.

“You sound like you want to kill someone.”

“And I do.” My answer made Seulgi laugh, making me sigh. And that person was Song Mingi, of course.

“What’s got your panties in a twist this time, huh?” Seulgi’s voice was playful, and unfortunately, it was only building up my irritation. She didn’t have any bad intentions, but I couldn’t handle her cheeriness and playfulness at the moment. I needed to be alone. I needed to not think and just get shit done.

“Why did you call?” I preferred not to answer her question as I asked another one, voice not snappy just tired as Seulgi remained silent for a second on the other end.

“Noir Zenith are performing at Outlaw tonight,” I knew where this was going, I just gulped realizing Mingi had asked the same thing of me just mere minutes ago, “Do you want to come with me?”

“No.” My answer was too fast and harsh, I quickly tried to mend it, “I’ve got a family thing—issue, I mean. I’m sorry, but I can’t come because of it…”

My voice got quiet as I trailed off, not particularly fond of lying to my best friend, but I really didn’t want to go out tonight and I knew if I told Seulgi the real reason she would complain and complain until I finally gave in, her tactic of coercion working just fine on me. I never stood a chance in front of her when she would start complaining and whining and bringing up all the times I have bailed on her in the past.

“Oh,” It wasn’t hard to hear the disappointment in her voice, and if I weren’t in such a bad headspace at the moment I would have felt awful, “it’s fine, I get it. But…you do know you can tell me anything, right?”

I sighed loudly, “I know, thanks Seulgi, and sorry. I’ll make it up to you somehow.”

“Don’t worry about it,” She was smiling now, adding a small chuckle too, “We all have bad days, I’ll see you at university tomorrow?”

“Most certainly.” A small smile made it onto my face and Seulgi quickly bid her goodbye as we hung up, silence enveloping me. I didn’t forget to press the ‘do not disturb’ button this time as I placed my phone on my desk, next to my laptop, and faced the article taunting me. Not finishing this project today wasn’t an option anymore, and so, I quickly dove in, the torturing thoughts finally silent somehow.

            The hours went by quickly and despite my mind struggling to focus on the task at hand, I made it. I finished the project in about four hours and it definitely gave me a little confidence boost, which I desperately needed after the emotional turmoil I was forced to face today. My mind was a mess. I was tired and I needed to sleep. I didn’t even care how early or late it was as I got into bed, forgetting to wash my face or even change into my pajamas, I just needed to lay my head down and close my eyes. And it was working well…until it wasn’t. The warmth of my thick blanket enveloped me and my head grew heavier as my muscles relaxed, the comfort of my bed bringing peace to my loud thoughts. It felt nice. To finally be able to forget everything that’s happened today, to just let go and…sleep. I really needed this; I haven’t felt this exhausted in a long time. I have never been good at dealing with my feelings, I usually pushed them away and ignored everything I felt…until they blew up in my face. Then, I would finally break and it was chaotic and messy. I knew it was the wrong coping mechanism, but I couldn’t help it. Nothing else worked, because I just couldn’t deal with the pain. I hated the overwhelming thoughts, the pressing heaviness and constant pain. I just simply didn’t want to deal with them. Drawing was a nice way of escaping my reality, but lately it didn’t help. It drew me up the wall, it was so frustrating. So many emotions had been steering hidden deep inside these past weeks, I didn’t know how to deal with them—I didn’t want to deal with them, actually. I needed them silent, gone.

And despite needing to sleep right now, eyes heavy and mind fuzzy, it wasn’t working. Nothing helped. My mind was silent, yet my ears were buzzing, whispers so quiet in the back of my head that I could barely hear them. My chest was heavy, it felt like I needed to cry, but my throat was closing in on me, refusing to let any tears to the surface. I could breathe, but at the same time I couldn’t. Turning on to my left side did nothing, but snap my eyes open. Why couldn’t I sleep? Why was this feeling returning? Why couldn’t I just rest for one fucking second?! I buried my head into my pillow and let out a silent scream, punching the soft mattress of my bed next to my head, legs trashing around as I needed to let out the creeping hysteria in my body somehow. Was I finally going crazy? Was my mother’s premonition finally blending into reality? She did randomly while watching TV, one month ago, tell me that I would soon face a challenging obstacle in my life, which would feel suffocating and relieving at the same time. Mind running per hour, I shot up in a sitting position and gaped at nothing in particular, recalling the memory of said night. But my mother said nothing else as she went back to watching TV, acting as if what she had said to me was totally normal. It wasn’t. But I was used to her quirky antics, she was a bit whimsical, but I loved her. Her intentions were always good and pure, she was a woman full of love and warmth…unlike me. Perhaps I was like my father…not that I could remember him, he’s left us while I was a little girl. We kept in touch until I turned approximately eight, after that…he never showed his face again. Something about moving to a new city and starting a new life, I couldn’t care less, he was never a pilar of support in my life. I didn’t need a man to bring me comfort, to make me feel safe. I had myself for that, and my mother—when things got too rough to handle on my own.

With a sigh, I reached over my bed and grabbed my sketchbook from my bedside table and turned on the small lamp, grabbing the pencil I had from underneath my pillow. Not one corner of my room was safe from my drawing supplies. I flipped the sketchbook open to a blank page and sighed, eyebrows lightly furrowing as I pressed the pencil against the soft paper. I didn’t have anything particular in mind as I started drawing. Maybe a small meadow with colorful flowers or a flower field, those sounded nice right now. It felt like they could fix my sour mood after today, like they would bring a little comfort to my overthinking brain at the moment. But I already knew I couldn’t control my hand when it came to drawing, and I wasn’t too surprised to find myself drawing the outline of a face. The lines were sharp and precise, darker around the brow bone and defining at the sharp and pointy nose. I added shading to the jawline before moving to the cheekbones, not making them too harsh. The sketch so far was looking like any regular face. It could turn into anything from here on. I could make it anyone I wanted it to be. For some reason my hand went to draw the lips instead of the eyes, usually those were the first thing I drew when starting a portrait. But this time, my brain focused on the dark outline of the plump lips and adding more depth as the Cupid’s Bow was deep and pointy. I licked my lips as I allowed my eyes to run over the eyeless portrait, subconsciously adding a small mole to the left side of its face, close to the jawline. I had a hunch where this was going, but I wanted to keep going—I couldn’t stop my brain from pushing me to just draw more. I allowed my pencil to run over the lines of the nose, making them sharper, lengthening it just like the person had it in real life. My hand hovered in the air for a second, reluctant to finally draw the eyes of the portrait, but I didn’t have it in me to stop right now. I always hated leaving my work unfinished—that was my excuse right now too, despite knowing who I was drawing once again. Yet not one particle in my body wished to stop right now, and I couldn’t help it as I finally drew lines sharp enough to accentuate the depth and glare in his deep eyes. The shading of them happened quickly and without even thinking, the small but dark mole sat comfortably underneath his right eye as I pressed my pencil firmly against the paper.

The breath which left my lips was sharp, and I gulped as my grip tightened around my pencil. I knew what I was doing this time, yet I didn’t stop it. Why? Why did I allow myself to draw—Mingi. His sharp and expressionless face stared back at me and I didn’t know what to do. He wasn’t mocking me, he didn’t have any twinkle in his eyes, he was just…there. On my paper, in my favorite journal-like sketchbook. And my heart was beating faster the longer I was looking at it. My stomach was twisting in a foreign way and I felt like I needed air. Fresh air. It felt like my room was closing in on me, I felt like I didn’t have enough space all of a sudden. The blanket falling on my lap suddenly felt too warm, like it was burning my body up. Without a second thought, I threw the sketchbook off from my lap, together with the blanket, and sprung out of bed, racing towards my closet. I threw it open and grabbed the first thing which came into view, a grey oversized jumper, as I stepped out of my slippers and slipped my phone into the pocket of my grey sweatpants, headed for my closed door. My throat was squeezing itself and it was a little hard to breathe as I frantically moved down the stairs, desperate for fresh air at this point. The light was on in the kitchen and I realized it wasn’t even ten pm yet as my mother was tinkering around, listening to some jazz music. I must’ve been loud as I almost crashed into the wall, struggling to put on my sneakers.

“Honey?” I heard my mother’s voice coming from behind me as I turned to look at her. Her ginger hair was a mess as her curls stuck out in all directions, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, “Everything alright?”

I nodded, fearing what my voice would sound like as I quickly wore the jumper in my hands, “Are you going out? It’s a little late…”

I hummed, licking my lips nervously, hand reaching for the doorknob, “I won’t take long, I promise.”

“Call me if you need me.” My mother had an understanding look on her face, it made my lips tremble, “I’ll pick you up.”

“Didn’t you drink?” My voice was slightly shaking as my eyes went to the wine glass she was holding in her right hand. My mother glanced down at it as if she had forgotten about it and quickly pushed it behind herself.

“We could always ride my electric scooter; I haven’t used it in quite a while.” My mother giggled at her own suggestion and I couldn’t help but let out an amused chuckle, the tightness in my throat lessening a little bit. How badly I wished to pour my heart out to her, to let my feelings finally loose, but I couldn’t. That would mean having to face what I was feeling. That would mean everything was real and not just made up by my useless brain.

“I’ll be home in an hour, don’t worry.” My mother just hummed as she watched me leave as I took my keys and closed the door carefully behind myself. The crisp air of the evening was a harsh wake-up call that I should’ve worn a jacket as well, but I didn’t have it in me to walk back inside my warm house. I couldn’t. I needed to walk. I needed to clear my mind. I had to get rid of this awful feeling in my chest. And so that’s just what I did, I walked. I took off towards nowhere particular as my feet carried me down the sidewalk, the streets illuminated by the lampposts, creating just enough light, but not too much. A few cars passed by then and now, the neighborhood relatively quiet at this hour of the evening. The cold air was biting at my cheeks and I buried my hands in my pockets, taking a deep breath before releasing it slowly. It felt nice as the cold air traveled through my throat, deep down into my lungs. It was refreshing, it was just what I needed. As I took a left turn, I left my neighborhood and realized I was headed towards the city center, more people on the road now as it was the main one. Groups of teenagers passed by me and I shivered at the sudden cold breeze. I looked around and watched as it picked up and blew the branches of the trees apart, more leaves falling to the ground, creating a blanket of orange and burgundy underneath our feet. The leaves crunched under my shoes and I felt myself smiling as I kicked into a smaller pile gathered up on the sidewalk by the wind, memories of my childhood fresh in my mind. My mother would always gather the leaves in our small backyard and then she’d take me outside and we’d play around for hours in the leaves, giggling and laughing as we’d pretend that I was a princess and she was the leaves monster trying to kidnap me from my kingdom. Despite my mother struggling at times, my childhood never lacked anything, and it was filled with many happy memories. Sometimes I wondered what changed that I turned into such a moody and sour person. There were remnants of my old self when I was with Seulgi or with my mother, but I was pretty bad at opening up to strangers, at letting others in…especially males. I couldn’t help but think they had other motives and were only waiting for the right time to fuck me over, to abandon me. My attention was brought to a couple as the girl screeched and ran past me, the boy chasing after her while holding something in his hands, giggling loudly and calling out her name. I couldn’t help but glance after them, the green monster back in my head, as the guy caught up with her and tackled her into a hug despite the girl’s loud complaints. I have realized, the guy was carrying dirt in his hands and the girl’s cheeks were already smudged with it, probably. My stomach clenched and it got harder to gulp as I tore my eyes off them, trying to take a deep breath, trying to push down the memories threatening to resurface.

But I couldn’t help it as Yunho made it to the forefront of my mind, our many dates stored away in a little treasure chest in my heart. We used to go on so many dates, Yunho loved trying out new things and visiting new places. Every second weekend he planned something new, he surprised me with something. I thought I was the luckiest girl on Earth. I thought I would never find anyone else who could love me and cherish me as much as Yunho—and perhaps I really never would. Because Yunho was special, because he made you feel like you were the only one in the whole world he could see, he could love. A small part of me still wished he loved me at some point. Of course, it did, I was so hopelessly in love with him once that everything was about him. I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t live without him. He was the only thing I could think about, I could talk about. Everyone told us how well we matched; how perfect we were for each other. The both of us always smiling, always so nice to others. Before getting abandoned by Yunho, I was—I wasn’t like this. I smiled, I laughed, and I joked around a lot. I was happy and I loved life, I loved everything around me and I had this urge to discover everything life had to offer me. I couldn’t stay put in one place for too long and I always had everything planned out, each step of mine—my life next to Yunho. The promises he made were still fresh in my mind, I could still remember them despite being it a long time ago—but perhaps it wasn’t long enough, I have suddenly come to the realization of it. It was hard to breathe again as my favorite moment with Yunho was suddenly too fresh in my mind, too easy to recall. We had gone to a movie he really wished to watch, something about a girl who had to pretend she was a boy in order to make it onto the university’s football team to get revenge on her ex, it was actually a re-run as the movie had come out a long time ago, but Yunho loved it and he really wanted to watch it at the cinema. Of course I went with him, I wanted to see the movie too because Yunho loved it. And what Yunho loved, I also did. It was an easy watch, lighthearted and cheesy and predictable, it didn’t surprise me that it was one of Yunho’s favorites. But once the movie was over Yunho wanted to get ice cream, and as someone who loves ice cream—mint choco is the best flavor, fight me—I was eager to go with Yunho. But our peace of mind didn’t last for long as it started raining cats and dogs in no time, forcing us to take shelter somewhere—except that we didn’t. Yunho pulled me out into the pouring rain and he made us dance, he acted out cheesy scenes from Dirty Dancing, raising me up and flipping me around clumsily, almost dropping me in the process not even once, making me shriek and clutch onto him for dear life. I have never laughed more in my life than that night and I have never felt more loved that in that moment. Yunho’s eyes were shining with so much warmth and happiness, it was also the first time he said the words. ‘I love you.’ I couldn’t tell whether it was the rain or happy tears on my cheeks, but the sudden clenching of my heart and overwhelming feeling in my chest made me flung my body against his, holding onto Yunho’s tall frame like my life depended on it. And in that moment, I knew—I knew that I also loved him. But I couldn’t say it, not yet, not when everything felt like it was too much, so instead, I pressed my lips against his pouty ones and smiled as Yunho started giggling, only to pick me up and twirl me around in excitement before asking me to hop on his back, only for him to take off running towards his house. It was my favorite memory of us, for various reasons, but perhaps the main one was because Yunho was so sincere in that moment. Because I couldn’t hear any doubt in his words like the other times he said that he loved me.

『Straight coats and empty cabinets

Ashes from all the mess you left

New lease without you

I confess that I'm happy you're gone』

I came to a stop as my phone buzzed in my pocket, mind hazy as I tried to shake off the memory which felt so alive in my head. I could almost see it playing out in front of myself. If I reached my hand out, I could almost touch Yunho—but he wasn’t here—and I was allowing myself once again to live in the past, a very bad habit of mine. I unlocked my phone after I crossed the road, the sidewalk littered with various shops, most of them already closed as it was almost ten now. I had been walking for twenty minutes without even realizing it. Looking down at my phone, I realized Instagram had sent me a notification that Seulgi posted a story after a while. She was probably at Outlaw still, watching Noir Zenith perform. I pressed on her story and it opened to show a close-up video of the three boys performing, the camera focusing on Wooyoung for a few seconds longer before it was moved away, zooming in on playfully on Mingi. I had the volume down, I couldn’t hear what he was singing, but his eyebrows were furrowed as he was leaning forward, mouth moving in a fast way as his eyes were half-closed, veins protruding on his neck, expression almost like he was angry, almost like feelings were overwhelming him as he held the microphone in his left hand tightly. My eyebrows slightly furrowed, but I quickly pushed any thought of him away as I realized he was slightly…wet? His white shirt, the top buttons unbuttoned until they reached his chest stuck to his body and had turned almost see-through, but it didn’t seem like it bothered Mingi as he continued on performing. Heavy chains lay against the base of his throat and a blue sheer sunglass was sitting on his tall nose, almost sliding off of it as he was bobbing his head furiously to the music, his bass abandoned somewhere. As my eyes focused on the huge bracelet on his right hand and the blue and white scarf wrapped around his left wrist, both hands decorated with thick silver-colored rings, the video cut off. I remained unblinking for a second, eyebrows twitching as I realized Seulgi had posted the video not even half an hour ago. So…the band was still performing and…Mingi was looking like that. Suddenly I was glad I wasn’t there to witness him being all indecent and acting like a—something. I most certainly wouldn’t hear the endless praises if I were there and the constant screaming of his baboons—perhaps calling them his fangirls would sound nicer, but I wouldn’t give him that satisfaction—and with my current mood, that was the last thing I wanted to see and hear. Mingi was detestable and I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of going to any of his other performances, finding them useless as I wasn’t even into their music. I started walking again, aware that the wind had picked up more, rustling the branches and leaves harsher, making me shiver in my underdressed state, reminding me that I should head home now. I said I wouldn’t stay out for too long, my thoughts seemed to have cleared just a little bit, besides, the cold air was enough to knock me out once I got to lay in my warm and comfortable bed.

『I don't care enough to miss you

After all the shit we've been through

My heart's comatose, comatose

I don't care enough to miss you

After all the shit we've been through

My heart's comatose, comatose』

However, the second I wanted to exit the app and put my phone away, a new story suddenly appeared in Seulgi’s spot and I gulped realizing who it was. Yunho’s happy and smiling face was taunting me in his profile picture, and before I could control myself, I pressed the icon, opening his story. The username Yuyu followed by a sunflower flashed for a second on the screen and then—and then everything around me stopped. There was no wind, there was no sound of cars passing by or people talking as they walked by me. It wasn’t cold anymore. My lungs failed me once again, but my mind went silent. Completely silent. There was a rumble in the distance, but I couldn’t say what it was. A girl, much smaller than him—and a lot cuter than myself—was laughing in the boomerang Yunho had posted, her black hair falling around her shoulders nicely, the white coat barely hiding the short lavender colored dress she was wearing. And Yunho—he looked so happy, he looked—whole. His face had gotten fuller, yet features sharper since the last time I had seen him. I have forgotten that I was still following him on Instagram. He had his arm around the girl’s shoulder and was actively pulling her into his side as he was smiling brightly too, his protruding front teeth showing as he had his eyes on the girl only. He had tagged her too and I was clicking on her name fast, before even thinking about what I was doing. Her profile was public and she had many posts. Most of herself, but there were some of the places she’s traveled to as well. But her most recent post—was with Yunho. The two sitting on a bench, then a selfie, and then a picture of the place they had been at, with the caption of: ‘Luckiest girl in the world!’ I gulped and closed the app, taking a deep breath, realizing that I had started shaking.

『You wasted all my fucking time

Were never really in my life

You were further than I could imagine

I love you, but fuck you』

Why did my legs feel like jelly all of a sudden? Why did the heaviness in my chest get even worse? Why was I reacting like this? It made no sense. Yunho broke up with me three years ago and I was over him. He hurt me more than anyone has before, but I was over him. I have let go; I have released the feelings I have felt for him. But then why did it bother me so much that he found happiness with someone else? Why did it leave a bitter taste in my mouth? Suddenly why was the green monster back and making me clutch my phone tightly in my hand? If he was able to find someone, to be happy again, why wasn’t I doing the same thing? Why was I incapable of loving? Of being loved? Of opening up and letting in new people? Why was I forcing myself to wallow in my own misery? Why was I punishing myself by constantly living in the past? What more could I want? Why did I still wish for Yunho to return and apologize for everything he’s done, for the gap he’s left in my heart? For the turmoil he’s caused in my head, for the ache that never really went away with his departure from my life? And it hit me lick a wall of bricks, that something was hitting my flaming cheeks. Another rumble, and I realized it was thunder. Head tilting back, I realized it was raining—pouring. Washing away the tears which were making my eyes burn. When did it start raining? Why did everything hurt so much? I couldn’t help the sudden sob which wracked my body as I put my phone in my pocket as a futile attempt to keep it dry as my clothes were getting drenched the longer I stood unmoving on the sidewalk. But my feet felt heavy, rendering me frozen to the spot. Nobody was outside anymore. I was alone. Just as always. No matter how many people cared for me, I was still alone in hurting, in dealing with the mess I was. And it hurt. It made me cry harder as I pressed a hand against my mouth, trying to muffle my pathetic sobs. But it felt good—so good to finally let it all out, to just finally allow the misery to come to the surface, to acknowledge that I couldn’t deal with these feelings anymore. My chest hurt, my heart ached, my throat was getting more and more restricting, lungs burning for air, but I couldn’t fully breathe, gasping for air caused by my violent sobs. But the wind was picking up again and my body started shivering, and I realized I couldn’t stand on the sidewalk anymore bawling my eyes out as I got drenched in rain.

So, I looked around and found a place open not too far up ahead and took off running towards it, trying to get the strands of hair out of my eyes as they stuck to my skin. The diner was small and still open, the big windows showed nobody inside besides the girl behind the counter. I didn’t consider the way I looked as I threw the door open and stepped inside, alerting the girl as the doorbell chimed. She looked up and for a second we stared at each other, her eyes widening as her eyes wandered all over my body, making me sniff. At least I wasn’t sobbing anymore, just heaving for air. I must’ve looked horrible as I took off towards a table in the back, closer to the restrooms, but I couldn’t bring myself to feel embarrassed over my appearance. I fell against the cushion of the bench and tried to regulate my breathing, biting my lower lip as I realized my eyes were burning and my skin was ice cold. I couldn’t believe I was stupid enough to stand out in the rain, when it was so cold. I would most definitely catch a cold now and that was the last thing I needed right now, but it was due to my own stupidity. I wiped my face with my hands, which were slightly shaking, as the girl from the counter came over.

“Uh,” She shuffled around awkwardly as I looked at her, “Can I bring you anything? Or uh, help with anything?”

A slap in the face to wake me up to reality would possibly be the biggest help she could be offering right now—but I thankfully didn’t say to her. She already looked uncomfortable by not knowing how to react to my current state. I sniffed and went to reach for my wallet before I would look at the menu, I had no idea how much money I had on me. But I quickly realized I had only grabbed my phone before leaving, sitting inside a diner never being in the plan. So instead I went to check on my phone if I had any money on my card, but my phone wasn’t working. Nothing. No matter how much I pressed the button to start it, it didn’t work. Fuck, I forgot to charge it before stepping outside.

“Uh,” Now I felt embarrassed as I averted my eyes from the girl, “I don’t have any money.”

“Oh,” She sounded surprised, “Well, then…I mean, I don’t want to sound rude, but uh—I will have to ask you to leave, really, I have nothing against you, it’s just that—”

“Don’t worry,” I forced myself to smile as I looked up at her, her cheeks red from embarrassment of having to kick me out, “I get it. May I use the restroom before I leave?”

“Sure, of course!” The girl almost exclaimed as she pointed towards the little hallway which led to the restrooms, “But we’ll be closing in about fifteen minutes, so don’t stay inside for too long.”

“Yeah, I’ll just patch myself up a bit and then go on my way.” I muttered as the girl nodded silently and walked back to the counter while carefully watching me, making me roll my eyes. Okay, I might have been looking like a mess, but I wasn’t a walking bomb—no need for her careful gaze on me. It just made my blood boil as I tried not to stomp while I went inside the restroom, glad that I was alone inside. It was colder in here compared to the diner and I shivered as I realized the window was open. I headed towards the sink, eager to warm up my hands with a little warm water, but I gasped once I saw my reflections in the mirror. Jesus Christ, I looked horrible, no wonder the girl was looking at me like that and asking me to leave—even if the reason was me not having money on me. My hair stuck to my face and looked matted in certain spots. My cheeks were completely flushed with the tip of my nose red as well, and I had dark streaks running down underneath my eyes. I forgot to take off my eyeliner and mascara before going to bed and since they weren’t waterproof—here I was, looking like a character straight out of a fucking horror movie. I chuckled as I turned on the faucet and instantly sighed at the feeling of warm water against my hands, warming my freezing limbs a bit. I quickly gathered water in my palms and splashed it against my cheeks, warming them up as well, sighing in content. I was still shivering, my toes frozen, but this was helping.

『I don't care enough to miss you

After all the shit we've been through

My heart's comatose, comatose』

I let the warm water run as I ran my fingers through my hair, easing the knots in them and trying to make it look presentable as I basically brushed the wet strands back on my head, my hair already curling naturally. The next step was to get rid of the mascara and eyeliner streaks underneath my eyes and even cheek, so I quickly washed them off before turning the faucet off and grabbing some dry towel paper from the holder, drying off my face and hands. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, realizing that my chest felt so much lighter, there was nothing squeezing against my throat anymore.

“You’re fine,” I whispered to myself, gulping, “Fuck, you’ve got this, you’re okay, Y/N, you are okay. You’ve been pushing your feelings away for too long, of course they blew up in your face, you stupid bitch. I really have to stop doing this to myself, ugh—”

I rolled my eyes as I threw the used towel paper in the trash bin and then looked back at myself in the mirror, narrowing my eyes at myself and pointing a finger threateningly at my reflection, “Stop being a sappy bitch, alright? You’re better than this. Yunho’s got his shit together, why can’t you do the same, huh? Just go out there and find a fucking boyfriend, it’s not that hard—wait, no, actually don’t do that! I don’t need no man, got it? Got it.”

I nodded once firmly, a small grin forcing itself onto my lips, making me scoff at myself—sure, of course, bring Yunho into your peptalk, Y/N, very smart—but I just couldn’t help it. At least I was feeling better now, almost laughing at myself at how stupid I was as I stepped back and pulled my shoulders back, nodding at myself encouragingly. I got this! But now I had to run home in the pouring rain, that thought alone was enough to make me cry again, but I willed myself to stop. No more crying. No more sobbing—especially not because of the pouring rain. It was my mistake that I didn’t check the weather or bring an umbrella. I should’ve just gone to bed when I planned to, damn these stupid thoughts. With a last glance at myself, I decided that I was ready to leave the restroom and head home, my mother probably worried sick about me at this point since my phone wasn’t working either. I walked up to the door and grabbed the doorknob firmly, yanking it open a little bit too enthusiastically, but as I went to step outside, the male’s restroom door right across mine opened as well—and I paused, surprised.

Song Mingi was staring back at me just as surprised as I was.

❱❱ Next chapter

[musical-shit-show]

dancing is a dangerous game

Pairing: Dewey Finn x Reader

Inspiration: Prompts #2 (“apparently all our friends have a bet going that we end up together.”) from Prompt List 1 and #15 (“would you ever consider going on a date with me?”) from Prompt List 2 requested by @animetattoochick

Warnings: mentions of drinking, strong language, suggestive dialogue, anxiety, mutual pining

Word Count: 2,305

Author's Note: We’re back baby! Thank you so much to @animetattoochick for this request and so sorry for the delay. I’m working through my other requests now and have more time this coming month to catch up. And very fitting since it’s spooky season and I have some more BJ requests in the pipeline ;) As always, check out my Masterlist, About Me page, and Prompt Lists if you’d like to submit a request! Happy reading!

“Do you want to go? I feel like it’s getting a bit crowded in here and the door’s right there—”

“Are you drunk?” Dewey asked incredulously, “We just got here!”

You groaned, wishing you were more drunk than you were. Dewey had a natural charm that allowed him to get away with way too much, including convincing you to go out. This time, it was a birthday party for one of Ned’s friends, and the degrees of separation barely warranted you being there.

The party was in the back room of the Roadhouse, and you nodded at some familiar faces as you still tried to formulate an escape plan. You weren’t the biggest partier, and would much rather be hanging out with your best friend on his couch.

You didn’t know when you first became friends with Dewey. You occasionally moonlighted as a substitute teacher, and after a few instances of bumping into Ned, he introduced you to his girlfriend, Patty, and Dewey.

The rest was history.

And although he was one of the only people you could truly rely on, you still found yourself cursing him for pushing you out of your comfort zone.

“Come on, I thought you liked the Roadhouse,” he egged, noticing your arms crossed over your chest in protest, “And they’re actually taking requests tonight! Maybe they’ll play some of that pop bullshit you like.”

Your mouth fell open slightly, then lilted upwards in an indignant smile. Dewey was also a master of getting under your skin.

“Excuse me, Finn,” you responded, “Just because you listen to metal and classic rock 24/7 doesn’t make your music taste any more superior to mine.”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, sweetheart,” he joked, pressing the bottle of beer he was nursing to his lips.

You scanned the room, and relaxed your shoulders as you noticed some familiar faces. Dewey was always the more adventurous one, the one who lit up a room. You didn’t mind fading into the background.

“I’ll uh, go find Patty,” you said, and Dewey’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. He really thought you’d put up more of a fight, “I’ll stay. For now. If you buy me a drink.”

He flashed a toothy smile, glad he could keep you around for a little while longer. “A fair trade. I’ll get right on it.” He gave a small salute, causing you to break into a grin of your own.

You made your way over to the other side of the bar to greet Patty, who was furrowing her brow at her phone. Never a good sign with her.

“Hey!”

“Hey, sorry, just finishing up this email,” she droned, rolling her eyes.

“Work?” She nodded wordlessly, and after a few silent moments, she locked her phone with a click and breathed a sigh of relief.

“I love my job, I love my job, I love my job…” she affirmed, rubbing her temples. You sat down at a stool next to her.

“Hey, well, at least it’s done, right?”

“Right, and I don’t have to think about the mayor’s schedule for another 48 hours, so I’m gonna get wasted,” you laughed at her directness as Ned sat on the other side of her, “You in?”

“Oh, uh, maybe?” you were still on the fence about staying too late, and the thought of a hangover did not sound enticing. “Dewey’s grabbing me a drink now, so—”

“Ugh, Dewey,” Patty said, earning an eye roll from Ned. You guessed he wasn’t thrilled about his best friend and girlfriend constantly warring, “When are you two going to hook up already, anyways?”

Your felt your face get hot with blush at the question. You and Dewey? The thought hadn’t crossed your mind. Not for a while, that is.

“What?”

“Oh my god, you’ve already hooked up, haven’t you?” she said, pulling you closer. You could feel sweat forming on the back of your neck, “Tell me everything.”

“Patty—”

“Ned, I swear to god—”

“No!” you said over their bickering, “I mean, sorry, no. Dewey and I, we’re not, I mean, we’re just friends.”

Patty looked at Ned, who quirked an eyebrow. Suddenly you felt very out of the loop.

“Does he know that?” she asked, a devious smirk spread across her face. You loved Patty, but sometimes her gossiping was beyond dangerous.

Before you could answer, Dewey arrived, a drink in each hand. “Jack and Coke, per usual,” he smiled, handing you the glass. You grabbed it, and immediately took a long swig.

“Whoa, killer, slow your roll,” he laughed. Patty and Ned both shifted on their stools. Dewey eyed the three of you suspiciously, “Why do I feel like I missed something?”

“Don’t worry about it, Dew,” Ned replied. For all of his nervous tendencies, he was pretty good at deflecting, “Wanna play some pool?”

You breathed a small sigh of relief as the two men headed towards the billiards tables, leaving you to finish off your drink and work quickly to order another.

***

“Why do you think me and Dewey hooked up?” you asked Patty, several hours and drinks later. Though you hadn’t crossed the threshold into full drunkenness, you were just tipsy enough to gain some courage.

She sighed, twirling the straw in her gin and tonic. “Because, my love, I see the way he looks at you,” she said, not an ounce of irony or sarcasm in her voice, “And don’t act like you don’t spend every waking moment together—”

“Because we’re friends!” you shot back defensively, “I mean, I’ve never even…I didn’t think he’d like me that way.”

Patty quirked an eyebrow. “Well, do you like him that way?”

A pit formed in your stomach almost instantly as you shifted your weight from one foot to the other. The alcohol in your veins was making you particularly honest.

“I guess, I don’t know…yes. I think. It’s complicated, okay?” you finally spat out, your voice hushed in fear that someone else would hear you, “He’s my best friend, and I didn’t want to ruin what we have so…I never did anything about it.”

For once, she shot you an empathetic look. Her and Dewey were reluctant roommates on the best of days, but even she was heartened by your babbling. “Well, no time but the present,” she said with a smirk.

Patty grabbed your shoulders to turn you ninety degrees, and you saw Dewey standing next to Ned, also a few beers in and clearly having a good time. You gulped, a slower pop song blaring in your ears as the weathered disco ball spun languidly.

“Move along now,” Patty taunted in your ear, “Ned and I have a little bet going about you two.”

“What?!”

“Just for fun,” she said, giving you a little nudge forward, “we have to entertain ourselves somehow, don’t we?”

You walked away from her, and before you had time to think, you heard yourself asking “Wanna dance?” to Dewey, who looked genuinely surprised by your proposition. Ned snuck off without a word, leaving the two of you alone.

A small smirk played on Dewey’s face as the two of you stepped towards the dance floor; there were several other couples dancing near you, and despite your liquid courage, you were praying you wouldn’t be the center of attention.

There was a brief moment of awkwardness as you placed your arms around his neck. It wasn’t like you and Dewey had never danced with each other before; he always had a way of dragging you to the dance floor when one of his favorite classics was played.

But now, you were acutely aware of the way his hands rested on your hips, and how your breath smelled like vodka, and the thin veil of sweat that was making his usually unruly hair stick to his forehead.

“Oh, come on,” he teased, his eyes flickering to your stance, “I think we can do better than the ‘leave room for Jesus’ bullshit, don’t you?” You laughed, realizing how far you were standing from him. It was as if you had been transported back to your 8th grade school dance.

Dewey grabbed one of your hands and laced his fingers with your own. You couldn’t help but let out a small gasp as he pulled your body flush to his, while his other palm gripped your waist tightly.

“That’s better,” he smiled, giving you another once over. Clearly the booze had made him more daring as well. You grinned back, doing your best to hide your newfound nerves.

“What’s gotten into you?”

“I don’t know, I’m just having a good night,” he shrugged, the two of you swaying in sync as the song continued, “You should try it sometime.”

Your mouth fell open slightly at his jab, “Hey, I’m the one who asked you to dance, remember?” you fired back, “Or are you drunker than I thought?” He shook his head in denial. “Quick,” you mocked, removing your hand from his and flashing three digits, “How many fingers am I holding up?” Dewey barked a laugh, gently grabbing your hand again. You smiled nervously at the gesture, your heart beating faster in your chest.

“Why did you ask me, by the way?” his voice uncharacteristically soft, “Not that I mind, but you know I’m used to more headbanging while I dance.”

You smiled, glancing over at Patty and Ned. They were watching you intently, drinks in hand. Of course.

“Apparently all our friends have a bet going that we end up together,” you tried to say nonchalantly, “Or more accurately, that we’ll sleep together. Or, have slept together. I don’t know—”

“Breathe,” Dewey stopped you, “It was Patty, wasn’t it?” You nodded sheepishly, and he shook his head in disbelief, “I swear that woman knows exactly how to drive me insane…I told her nothing is going on between us.” You couldn’t help but notice that his voice had a slight tinge of sadness.

Now was your chance. You said a silent prayer that your nerves wouldn’t get the best of you.

“I mean…it’s not that crazy of an idea, is it?” you probed, doing your best to not shift your eye contact away from Dewey’s brown ones, “We do spend a ton of time together…honestly thinking about it, I kinda get why everyone thinks we’ve…”

Dewey’s eyes widened in mild surprise as you trailed off, the implication clearly hanging in the air. He never would’ve thought he’d be the cautious one when it came to this topic.

“Yeah, sure,” he conceded, “But wouldn’t that, ya know…change things?”

He always had feelings for you, but he didn’t want to risk ruining your friendship. You were too important to him, and an amazing friend, so he had silently resigned himself to hold those feelings close to his chest.

You swallowed your fear and shoved it down your throat. “Of course,” you became acutely aware of your palms growing sweatier by the second and hoped he didn’t notice, “But is it bad that I don’t care? Maybe we could give it a try. It could be good. Really good, even.”

“Goddamn, what has gotten into you tonight?” he threw your own question back at you as you felt your face getting flush.

“Maybe I don’t want to be a wuss anymore,” you smiled, “You should take notes, Finn.” He barked a laugh at your teasing.

Your stomach flipped as a completely new expression came over Dewey’s face. Well, at least completely new to you; who knows how he looked at you when you weren’t paying attention.

But you could tell from the way he eyed you that something finally shifted. “So,” he said coyly, “Since I’m a gentleman, I’m just going to make sure I do this the right way: Would you ever consider going on a date with me?”

Before you could answer, he spun you around and dipped you playfully, a giggle bubbling out of you as the song came to a close.

“Duh, you idiot,” you laughed, heart swelling in your chest now that the pent-up feelings you held onto for years were finally released. How could you have missed what was right in front of you for so long? You were almost embarrassed that Patty had to spell it out for you.

“Or maybe we could skip the date and go back to your place instead?” Dewey couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow suggestively. He certainly didn’t wait to start the blatant flirting, and you weren’t exactly complaining.

Still, you couldn’t help but roll your eyes, “Why, so you can avoid Patty for the rest of the night?”

“…Maybe.”

“No.”

“Can you blame me? She’s a nightmare.”

“She’s fine, Dew,” you said as you both walked away from the dance floor, “And you have to admit, she clocked us pretty well.”

“I am not drunk enough to pay that woman a compliment,” he retorted, crossing his arms across his chest. You knew he was only partially kidding but still laughed anyways, “And she wasn’t right about everything. We haven’t hooked up. Again, we can definitely change that—”

“Don’t make me punch you, Finn,” you threatened, a playful smile dancing on your lips. You couldn’t believe how easily you both slipped into casual flirting; then again, you wondered if you had always been doing it without even realizing.

It was clear everyone else noticed, not that it mattered anymore.

“Kidding,” he said, throwing his hands up in mock surrender, “Kind of.”

“How about this,” you proposed, reaching the bar again. Luckily none of your friends were around to grill you just yet, “You buy me another drink, we dance some more, and see where the night takes us?”

Dewey’s eyes lit up with excitement. “Looks like you’ve got yourself a deal.”

*****

Thanks for reading! Like/comment/reblog if you enjoyed :)

[brookediamonds]

like snow on the beach | dalton lambert x reader

gif is not mine

Summary: You and Dalton are hanging out like you normally do when you find out he has a muse when he creates. Heartbroken it isn't you, you spend the night pondering the last few months and how this will affect your future, possibly without him.

Warnings: None, fluff, angst, mutual pinning, Fem! Reader

Word Count: 2K

Song Inspo: snow on the beach by taylor swift

Dalton Lambert x Fem! Reader

I sat on Dalton's bed reading a new romcom book I picked up earlier as he continued to finish his art project that was due tomorrow.

Music played softly in the background as we dwelled into our hobbies while still enjoying each other's silent presence.

"Done," The artist stood in front of his now finished canvas looking over the assignment. Glancing up from my page, I admire the work he spent the last few days on.

"Wow," I stare at the painting in awe. The colors are bright and fiery the whole thing was eye-catching. "I don't think I've ever seen you use colors like those."

"I normally don't use such loud colors but," he looked over at me a grin breaking out on his face before facing the painting again. "I've been inspired lately."

Part of me is beaming but the other part of me is dying on the inside because who was inspiring the boy I grew to have a crush on?

"Oh," I nod shutting my book closed. Scooting down to the edge of the bed, I watch as Dalton continues to look over his project double checking it was to his liking.

"What's been inspiring you lately?" I gain the courage to ask careful not to use 'who.'

"A girl," he answers nonchalantly, his back still facing me.

I felt my heart drop to the pit of my stomach. The last few months replayed in my mind, the longing stares, playful banters, late night study sessions, Sunday sundae's in the student lounge, had it all been in my head?

Were we just two friends hanging out to him?

"Lucky her," I breathe out. Before he can say anything else, I slip on my grey slippers and begin to stand up.

"I just remembered I need to turn this assignment in for English, it's due at midnight," I stammer out.

"Do you wanna use my laptop?" Dalton asks motioning over to the computer on his desk.

"N-No!" I reassure him quickly. "I have it saved it specifically in a folder on my laptop."

"Oh, okay, are you gonna come back so we can watch 'Suits?" He grins referring to our usual hangout routine. Last month we binged Better Call Saul, this month it's Suits.

I stood by his door with my hand on the handle ready to flee.

"Actually I feel a migraine coming on," I pretend to wince, pressing my palm to my forehead. "So I'm just gonna head to bed after I submit my paper."

"Do you want me to get you some ice and bring it to your room?" The boy frowns taking a step closer to me knowing my go to remedy was an ice pack.

"No, I just want to be in a dark room," I say quietly avoiding his gaze. To cry my heart out.

"Okay, well text or call me if you need something alright?" He reassures me. "Just down the hall."

Which was true, he was four dorms down the hall from me

I nod ready to walk when he suddenly took ahold of my wrist spinning me around to pull me into his chest. We never leave each other without a hug.

This was the hardest part, being in his warm embrace. It was strong and comforting, the way I can hear his heartbeat against his chest, how perfectly my body molds into his.

All of me is screaming to get away and run before you break down right here but the way he sway from side to side with his cheek pressed to the top of my head, I stay taking in this moment that could be the last.

"Is this helping?" Dalton whispers unaware of his words.

"I wish," I mumbled. It's making it worse.

Pushing him away, I turn away opening the door rather quickly, and walking out prepared to spend the rest of my night sulking in my bed.

-

Waking up the next morning I feel the pounding in my head erupt due to the amount of crying I did last night.

It didn't help that I watched 'P.S. I Love You' but sometimes you just need that extra push to get out that good cry.

"Here," my roommate Izzy holds out two pills of Tylenol for me with a bottle of water.

"How'd you know?" I mumble, half my face still in my pillow.

"The trash is filled with tissues and it smells like popcorn in here," she teases me. I grab the pills from her hand, sitting up in my spot to take the medicine.

"I thought you were staying at Jaime's," I recall her saying she was supposed to spend the night at her girlfriend's room since her roommate was gone for the weekend.

"I did, I forgot my insulin," she walks over to her mini fridge to grab her small bag of her prescription. "Why were you crying last night?"

Swallowing down the two pills, I wiped my mouth to prevent the excess water from dripping down my chin.

"Sad movie," I respond lamely, laying back against my pillows.

Izzy stood up from her place, watching me with careful eyes.

"You only watch a sad movie when you're already sad," she points out. Damn, she knew that? "What happened?"

I sighed scooting further down into my bed, not wanting to bring up last night events. I was being dramatic, I shouldn't be this emotional over someone.

Dalton didn't mean to intentionally hurt my feelings, so how could I be upset?

"I got my hopes up, like always," I responded crossing my arms over my chest.

"With Dalton?" She asked raising her eyebrows. I told her about the liking I had taken on the boy the second I got back from hanging out with him and Chris. "Did you tell him?"

"Not really," I mumble avoiding eye contact with her.

She places a hand on her hip giving me a knowing stare that I wanted to avoid.

"How can you get your hopes up if you haven't even told him how you feel?" Izzy states bluntly making me cringe.

"Its what he said last night," I sighed. "He painted a really beautiful picture of a garden with the sun, with all these bright and pretty colors."

Izzy walked over to my bed waiting for me to continue.

"Dalton doesn't use too much color when he creates, so when I asked why this time around, he said it's because someone inspired him," I explain reliving last night's events.

"So? That someone could've been anybody-"

"He said it was a girl," I say lowly looking to my right at the wall in front of me. Since becoming friends with Dalton, he's gifted me all sorts of drawings.

My favorite flower, peony, a portrait of Louis Armstrong because that's my favorite artist to listen to when I'm reading, and my personal favorite, a painting of me reading my favorite book.

"Was he looking at you when he said that?" My roommate asked a frown forming on her lips. I began to feel that heaviness on my chest again, this time I didn't need a movie help get out this cry.

"Nope," I confirmed for her, my eyes swelling with tears. "I left after that."

Before Izzy could respond, there's a knock at our door causing me to panic.

"I don't want to see anyone right now," I begged my friend. "Send whoever it is away."

Wiping away my stray tears, Izzy creaks the door open before looking over at me with a sheepish smile.

"I think you'll want to see this person," she says opening the door wider to reveal the boy I wanted to avoid.

"I brought you your favorites," Dalton gives me a small smile as he holds up an iced vanilla cold brew in one hand and a small bag in the other which I'm sure was the breakfast sandwich I always got at Starbucks.

Dalton used to give me a hard time about my Starbucks intake but after forcing him to try my favorites he understood why I was so broke all the time.

"Call me," Izzy mouthes to me before walking out of the room, shutting the door behind her.

Dalton saunters over to me, handing me my items as I sit there dumbfounded at what my roommate just did.

"You feeling better this morning?" He asks taking a seat at my feet. "Was hoping the coffee would help."

"Yeah, I'm still not all there," I sniffle avoiding his gaze as I stir the sweet cream at the bottom to blend in with the cold brew.

"Sounds like you might have a cold," he reaches his hand out to press the back of it to my forehead then my cheeks. "Maybe we should-"

"Dalton," I cut him off removing his hand away from my face. "I'm not sick."

There's a pang of guilt in me when I see the look of hurt come across the boys face. He was just trying to help and I was being bitter.

"You can't help with this," I assure him quietly taking a sip of the drink in my hand. So good.

"Try me," the blonde pushes. I sigh looking him dead in the eye.

"I really like you, Dalton," I finally let out. "I like you like I'll let you have the last bite of this sandwich like you, I like you like I think of you in every love song Taylor Swift has ever wrote like you, I like you like I want to call you after any little exciting thing happens to me like you."

"I like you so much, and you told me another girl is inspiring you," I look down at my hands that were slowly growing cold due to the melting beverage in my hand.

Dalton falls silent for a moment making me sick to my stomach. I poured my truth out, that's all I can do. I probably just ruined everything. No more Friday show binging, no more Tuesday study sessions with Chris, no more of him picking off my food in the mornings.

It's all over.

"You didn't look at my painting very well," he finally breaks the silence. Looking up at him, I furrow my brows.

"What?"

"You are the girl," the corners of his mouth quip up. "You've been my inspiration since the first day Chris introduced us."

My breath hitches in my throat as I take a deep breath.

"I've been drawing peonies since I saw them on your phone case," he admits reaching out to tap the back of my phone.

I think back to the painting from last night and immediately recall the colors of different pinks splattered across the canvas below the bright orangey sun.

"Peonies are playful, beautiful, lively, and bashful, just like you," he says gently running his thumb over the top of my cheek. "Incase it isn't obvious already, I really like you too, (Y/n)."

Relief washes over me, a giddy feeling running through my veins instead.

"You think I'm beautiful?" I tease him tilting my head to the side. Dalton shakes his head biting back a grin.

"Playful," he refers back to the flower's characteristics.

He lays his palm flat against the side of my face making me lean into his touch.

"Can I kiss you?" He asks staring at me with adoration.

"Never ask again," I confirm for him before pressing locking my lips with his. I snake my free hand around the back of his neck pulling him closer to my body.

My heart sputters in my chest, as our mouths become familiar with one another's. His mouth still tasted minty from bushing his teeth not too long ago, while I'm sure mine tasted of coffee.

We pull away slowly, the tips of our noses still touching.

"You are so beautiful," he whispers confirming my question from earlier.

A warmth splays across my cheeks at his compliment, I smile widely leaning my forehead against his.

"I suddenly feel so much better," I quip up placing my arms over Dalton's shoulders.

"Good," he murmurs pressing a soft kiss to my forehead moving his hands to grasp my hips. "Because I'm taking you out for lunch."

"Why not dinner?" I chuckle at the unusual date time.

"Because we're doing what we should've done last night, tonight," he explains. "We are watching 'Suits' and eating candy as soon as we get back."

"Oh," I laugh realizing his plan.

"Does that sound good to you?" He asks bumping his head with mine.

"Sounds perfect."

[writing-for-life]

Hey there! I hope you’re having a good day. I just saw a post you made about Dream’s type romantically. Thoughts on Calliope and Dream’s relationship specifically? It always stands out to me how though Dream has had a number of lovers throughout the millennia, Calliope is the only one he married. (And of course, Melissanthi Mahut and Tom Sturridge’s blistering chemistry in the show is an additional component for me xD but feel free to respond only based on the comics if you wish!)

Hey, always happy to see your asks in my inbox!

So, first of all; I don’t care what everyone else thinks:

Dream and Calliope are the OTP even though I’m not a shipper. There, I said it, hit me over the head with a hammer, I live well in that tiny little corner of fandom 🤣

Conceptually, they are very, very alike. There is definitely something in there about dreams marrying epic poetry (and eloquence!) that’s just so on the nose.

But I also can’t help thinking: Slight power imbalance maybe, and we also get this more directly via the “all gods get born and die in the Dreaming.” I think often about how this would have played out for them once Calliope’s last worshippers have died—it’s certainly a tough one, even if their relationship hadn’t soured.

But even so: She is the Muse of Epic Poetry, he is the Prince of Stories, so there is A LOT of overlap between what they stand for. And hence, a lot of mutual understanding. They always struck me as *getting* each other (probably why they fell in love in the first place)—until they didn’t. The fact they didn’t live together was good for them I think, because thoughts need to be allowed freedom to form and develop. Plus, there’s also a lot to be said for Calliope keeping her independence that way. Not just in terms of personhood, but again if you think of how she was essentially created in, and will return to, the Dreaming. It’s probably wise for her (in conceptual terms) not to hang out there ALL the time?

She seems a lot more grounded in the mortal world than Dream is though. I always thought that was down to the fact that humans know her, as in actively worship her/ask her for inspiration, which must make her much closer in a way? Because bar a few, no one really *knows* Dream exists, although everyone does, if that makes any sense? Mortals know him on a subconscious level (that’s why he’s forever nebulous and *lonely*), but people know Calliope as a deity and seek connection explicitly. I’m not sure what I’m trying to say here, but to me, that was always a reason why, although a goddess, she seemed far less removed from the mortal plight than Dream was (at least when they were still an item—we all know he changed, even if he didn’t admit it [well, he did in the end to Nuala, which is a whole ‘nother topic]).

And when I think about why they didn’t work out, I can only think: “Orpheus”.

I mean yes, she said that they were already starting to drift apart slightly before she was with child, but there was still a lot of love between them even so. I think the death knell was to have a child on these wonky foundations. Why they did, we’ll never know.

Conceptually, there’s again something very deep and painful about dreams and poetry becoming something real. And then, that mortal child becoming immortal (until his father finally intervenes). But Orpheus was still all mortal and human to his core, even when he became immortal for a while, and that was *always* at the base of their rift. But I digress…

Back to why was Orpheus the death of their marriage? Dream’s advice to Orpheus was sound, yet it was unfeeling and lacked empathy. Calliope’s was maybe (?) not as reasonable, but she understood her child because a mother’s love is (usually) unconditional. We all know Dream’s wasn’t for a long time although it should have been.

I think if they’d all sat together as a family, supported their son in his grief in a balanced way, this whole catastrophe could have been avoided (I mean no, not really—it’s a tragedy, “doomed by the narrative” and all that). But all of Dream’s relationships (be that to his son or his lovers) fail because he is unreality (hence he has a hard time when things quite literally get real), and despite *knowing* mortals on a very deep level, I don’t believe he truly *understood* them at this point. But I think Calliope did—maybe due to who she was, maybe just because she actually *allowed* them in? Because Dream never truly did that. And when he finally did and truly understood what unconditional love actually means, he came apart at the seams and unravelled.

There’s also something really interesting conceptually in thinking of the Prince of Stories who doesn’t believe he has his own, and the Muse of Epic Poetry who inspires. Who is trying to control whom in this scenario? It’s mirrored in how they behave when the whole Orpheus tragedy takes off:

Calliope tries to inspire and, dare I say try to control the narrative a bit, and I don’t mean this in a bad way, quite the opposite: She looks for the most favourable outcome for everyone involved, even if it means bending the rules: She tries to convince Dream to put in a good word with Hades and believes he would listen because Gods respect him and, dare I say it, are even a bit scared of him.

Dream is rigid. Which is so mind-bending for someone who is the personification of hopes, wishes and possibility. But he is an immovable object: If he’s right, he’s right. That’s the rules, that’s it. And he won’t bend them, not even for his son. I’m not saying that it’s not understandable from his point of view, because he might know things we don’t (potentially also that although he *could* bend the rules because he has the power to do so, it might have knock-on effects no one else can understand or see—it’s impossible to say), only that they are fundamentally different in their approach although they are *both* about inspiration. And inspiration is so closely related to bringing on change (ouch!).

Part of me wants to say that Calliope uses it to control the narrative while Dream doesn’t, that Calliope believes that we can change our destiny while Dream doesn’t, but that’s also too simple. Because Dream *can* be controlling, but in totally different ways and areas.

I feel like I’m rambling out a lot of unordered thoughts, but I guess what I’m trying to say is that Dream and Calliope were so close because they are so similar in so many ways bar one:

Their understanding how inspiration can be used to bring on change. I would somehow go as far as saying that Calliope understands what it means to have personhood, also for herself, and that’s why she understands it in others (I think this is made *very* clear when Richard Madoc holds her hostage). Dream doesn’t—least not at the point where it would have mattered with regards to their relationship, because I think the fishbowl has changed him in that regard. This is also why he wants to make things right with her I believe. But of course he would never openly admit it (he basically stops himself before blurting it out), simply because it would also mean he’d need to admit it to himself…

With regard to that meta:

I definitely think they were highly romantically attracted, purely down to who/what they are. I can’t say too much about their sexual attraction, but after Calliope’s speech at his wake, it would be somewhat unlikely to assume they weren’t 🙈🤣

Was it unconditional though? No.

Was it pragmatic (that sounds so bad and unfeeling, but it’s not a bad thing, because a certain level of pragmatism is what grounds love in reality and makes it last)? I think they tried. But ultimately, he can never live that way because he is unreality, and I often wonder if they both knew 😭

@two-hands-toward-the-sun ask answered

[kuzann]

Escape from the Holidays

My Holiday Truce present for @deuynndoodles! Sam and Tucker get Danny away from the Santa argument for some much-needed relaxation. 💜 Also on Ao3!

Danny trudged his way through the fall season, doing his best to ignore the Christmas merch that was already showing up in stores by Halloween. Holiday creep was annoying in general, but for Danny it acted as an omen of things to come once December rolled around. As the weeks ticked by the knot of stress and anxiety grew in the pit of his stomach; the worst month of the year was approaching and there was nothing he could do about it. He would simply have to endure whatever misery the yearly argument brought just as he did every year.

December 1st arrived. The more restrained organizations of Amity Park at last began to put up their Christmas decorations. FentonWorks lit up in red, white, and green just like the rest of the neighborhood and, like clockwork, the Santa argument began. Danny was long past caring whether Santa Claus was real or not; the only thing that mattered was the fact that the argument made every single December a writhing mass of stress and mess cleanup.

Five days after the start of December he and Jazz sat in the living room after being summoned for a family board game, only for the Santa argument to overshadow everything before the game could even make it out of the box. Jazz hid her face in her newest psychology book while Danny glowered at his parents and wished he’d thought to grab his phone before his dad pestered him into coming downstairs for ‘family time’.

He was just checking his watch for the dozenth time when the front door slammed open. Sam and Tucker hurried into the living room, still breathless from running over. The sudden intrusion put a temporary pause on the argument as the Fentons turned to their new guests.

“Mr. and Mrs. Fenton, there’s a ghost attacking the docks!” Tucker said, still a little breathless from the run as he jerked a thumb over his shoulder.

“You gotta hurry before he gets away!” Sam added. “He’s trying to steal a bunch of shipping boxes!”

“No ghost is making off with holiday gifts while the Fentons are on the job!” Jack declared as he and Maddie drew their concealed weapons. They barged out the door past Sam and Tucker and out into the snowy night.

“Nothing stops the holiday argument like their mutual hatred of ghosts,” Tucker said with a knowing smile.

“Well, we better get going,” Danny grumbled as he stood. “So who is it this time? It’s the Box Ghost, isn’t it?”

“It is, but he’s not our problem tonight,” Sam said with a proud smile of her own. “Come on, you really think your parents can’t handle the Box Ghost?”

“Well since my mom’s out there I guess I shouldn’t worry...” Danny admitted with a small smile. He was already starting to feel a little better now that he didn’t have to witness the Santa argument. “We do need to figure out something for dinner now, though,” he added as he shared a glance with Jazz.

“Don’t worry about it, you’re coming over to my house and we’re ordering takeout,” Sam said.

“We call it Operation: Get Danny Away from the Stupid Santa Argument,” Tucker added with a grin. “And Jazz too, if she wants to hang out with us.”

“Well given that I’ll be all alone here after you guys leave...” Jazz began. “You’re sure you’re okay with me joining in? I’m not gonna cramp your style or anything?”

“Any Fenton who isn’t part of the Santa argument is welcome in my book,” Danny replied.

~~~

Sam’s parents were surprisingly pleasant when the four of them arrived; Danny was under the impression that they didn’t care for him or his family, and tonight he had the sneaking suspicion that Mrs. Manson was going to rub being a superior parent in his parents’ faces at some point in the near future because of all this. Jazz lingered to give them a full rundown of her college plans when they asked what she was up to as a matter of courtesy, which gave Sam ample opportunity to get her other guests upstairs and into her room without any further delay.

Her room was dimly-lit by warm red string lights she’d added recently. The effect was almost cozy, despite Sam’s likely intent of using them to boost the goth look to her room. It was certainly more calming than the sea of Christmas lights that decorated most of the city. The curtains were already drawn when they arrived, blocking off any view of the city beyond. Closed, comfortable, and warm.

“So what kind of food are we feeling like tonight?” Sam asked once they were safely in her room.

“Something other than pizza,” Danny replied as he flopped down on a massive black bean bag chair. “I think I’ve finally had enough pizza for a little while.”

“I could go for some Thai food,” Tucker added as he dropped onto the oversized bean bag next to Danny.

“I know a great Thai place.” Sam turned to a nearby bookshelf and took a binder labeled ‘Restaurants’ from it, then leafed through until she found the page she wanted. “Here we go,” she said as she took the menu from a sheet protector within.

“So organized,” Tucker said with a chuckle as Sam passed the menu to them.

“Well when you have dietary restrictions it helps to remember the places that can accommodate,” Sam said.

“Smart,” Danny said. He leaned in, bumping shoulders with Tucker as he read the menu as well. “Think I’ll pick the pad thai with chicken.”

“Red curry with beef for me,” Tucker said.

Danny leaned back against the bean bag and closed his eyes as Sam left to ask Jazz what she wanted. It was quiet in Sam’s room—soundproofed to keep her and her parents’ music tastes completely separate, for everyone’s sake—and no holiday music reached them here. He could almost pretend that this was just any other month and that he didn’t have another miserable holiday season to look forward to once he left. The ball of stress that sat sharp and heavy in his chest slowly began to unwind.

His phone buzzed with a received text. Danny opened his eyes and checked it: Valerie had made it to her grandparents’ house and was asking how he was doing. He smiled and texted back: [Glad ur safe. Sam & Tucker rescued me from Santa argument so doing good]

“Val checking in?” Tucker asked.

“Yep, she’s safe at her grandparents’ house,” Danny replied. Worry over Valerie staying safe on the slippery roads had been sitting at the back of his mind ever since she left the previous day, and it was good to have it resolved for now.

Sam returned with Jazz in tow. “Food’s ordered, now we just have to wait.” She strolled over and dropped down onto the unoccupied side of the bean bag. “Did I miss anything?”

“Valerie made it to her grandparents’ house,” Danny replied.

“That’s good. The roads are pretty treacherous this time of year,” Sam said. She stretched, then fell back against the bean bag, bumping shoulders with Danny. “She’ll be here next time we do this.”

“Next time?” Danny raised his eyebrows with the question as he looked at her.

“Yeah we were thinking once a week,” Tucker added. “Maybe more often. Depends on how stressed out you get.” He gave Danny a playful poke on the forehead.

“We couldn’t just sit back and let you be miserable for the whole season,” Sam said. “Besides, it’s nice to get a break from the holiday rush.”

Danny smiled, and he let out a long slow sigh as he sank into the bean bag a little further. “Thanks, guys.” He pulled the two into a hug. “This really means a lot.”

“Don’t mention it, dude,” Tucker said as he and Sam returned the hug. “So what should we do while we wait for the food to get here?”

“I found this card game called Five Crowns recently,” Sam said. “Let’s try it out.”

~~~

The Jacks were wild by the time the food arrived at the front door. Danny and Tucker were almost tied for last place with scores exceeding one hundred points while Jazz sat squarely in the lead with only thirty-five. With two hands to go there was still a chance that Sam could unseat her as the to-be winner, but only time would tell.

Sam brought the food up and the four of them sorted out their meals from the bag. They dug in, chattering all the while about school, video games, movies, future plans. The cards had been laid aside for the moment, to spare them the possibility of getting messy from the food.

Danny forgot the date after a while. It felt like any other night of the year, which was exactly what he needed. He was finally at ease as they set the remnants of dinner aside and picked up their game again.

~~~

Jazz won the game in the end, despite a valiant effort to defeat her on Sam’s part. Danny ended with a ridiculous sum of four hundred and twenty-six points. He didn’t mind. It was the simple act of playing the game that he’d enjoyed, win or lose.

With the game over they set about finding other ways to occupy the time. Sam brought up a new fantasy RPG she’d bought recently and asked if they wanted to do a joint save so they could enjoy the story together.

The three plopped down on the big bean bag chair again with Danny in the middle and took turns on the controller, laughing and riffing on the game’s sillier story beats and praising it for the things it did well. Meanwhile Jazz sat at Sam’s desk with a book open before her, a small smile on her face as she kept half an ear on their fun, chuckling every so often at one of their jokes.

Hours drifted past, carrying them late into the evening, and at last the three began to nod off. Sam and Tucker each rested on one of Danny’s shoulders, the book Sam had been perusing laying open across her lap while Tucker’s PDA had almost slipped out of his hand as he slept.

Once she was sure they were soundly asleep Jazz took a nearby blanket and draped it over the three, gently tucking the edges around them to trap in the warmth. Danny was truly fortunate to have such good friends. Getting him away from holiday stress was exactly what he needed, and with them whisking him away like this every few days he would be able to weather the season much better than he had in previous years.

Jazz tiptoed back to the desk and sat down again. She would wake them in a little while to take Danny home, but for now all she wanted was to let him sleep peacefully for as long as he could.

[en-geneisaxx]

𝐴 𝑐ℎ𝑖𝑙𝑑ℎ𝑜𝑜𝑑 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑠 𝑡𝑎𝑘𝑒𝑛 𝑎 𝑑𝑎𝑟𝑘 𝑦𝑒𝑡 𝑏𝑒𝑎𝑢𝑡𝑖𝑓𝑢𝑙 𝑡𝑢𝑟𝑛 𝑎𝑠 𝑡𝑤𝑜 𝑝𝑒𝑜𝑝𝑙𝑒 𝑣𝑖𝑐𝑡𝑖𝑚 𝑡𝑜 𝑓𝑎𝑡𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑓𝑖𝑔𝑢𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝑓𝑒𝑒𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟. 𝑊ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑑𝑒𝑎𝑡ℎ 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒𝑠 𝑖𝑡𝑠 𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑒, 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑓𝑢𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑝𝑠 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑖𝑛 𝑖𝑡𝑠 𝑔𝑟𝑎𝑠𝑝. 𝑂ℎ, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑐𝑎𝑛'𝑡 𝑒𝑠𝑐𝑎𝑝𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑝𝑟𝑖𝑠𝑜𝑛: ℎ𝑖𝑠.

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐘𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞!𝐒𝐮𝐠𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐚 𝐱 𝐘/𝐧

Warnings/content: Death, mentions of killing, stabbing, abuse, angst (not sure if I did this successfully but oh well), yandere behaviour (m), high school au, fluff, stalking (through camera), threatening, mdni, lmk if I missed anything!

A/n: HEY HEY HEY! Came back from the dead after writing 8 drafts for this one fic (gonna make it two long fics bc hopefully starting a fresh clean draft will help me out for once). I hope you guys enjoy and feedback is always welcome!

PLEASE, 𝐑𝐄𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐆, 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃/𝐎𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖 𝐌𝐄. (This acc applies to every author out here, especially if we spend sm time on writing these). The lack of sleep I had just to make this decent is concerning. We, writers, work hard on our fics, so we wish that it spreads to many audiences as possible

Once again, if you ever read, I hope you enjoy!

Part 1

To start off high school, which school will you be attending? Turns out it’s your brother’s school:

Karasuno High.

September has started, and it’s your first day of High School. You walked together with your older brother, Daichi, who’s going to leave once it’s your second year. You felt quite disappointed, for you liked hanging out with your brother. For many, that’s a special case, because there’s always the stereotypes of siblings on bad terms with each other. However, being brought up in a strict environment, you found comfort in each other. Simply put, the two of you depended on each other, and it was mutual. 

Being in such an environment has taken a toll on your mental health and personality. At first, your parents were so kind to you, bringing you up like a normal child. But, once your tutoring started at the age of four, they gave you the harsh treatment. It was cruel, because you were only young, yet they threatened to disown you, just for not doing the day’s worksheets. They made you cry, hit you, abused you, changing you from a bubbly E to a “depressed” I. Yes, people had made fun of you as you got older, calling you “depressed” or “emo”. It was normally based on your attitude, the colours you wore the most, how you presented yourself. Tired of trying to prove your classmates wrong, you decided to play along to their judgements. You know the saying, ‘You are what you pretend to be’? Turns out, that was true, and you had problems changing it. 

When you’re alone, talking to yourself, you’re so chatty and energetic. You make yourself as the life of the party, cheering up all these imaginary people that live inside your head. That was the consequence of being delusional. You did know it was fake, yet when else could you act so happy? It was what kept you going in hard times, so you decided to cling onto your dreams for a little longer. 

Though, the extra education has certainly helped you in your studies and grades. From the start onwards, you were well-known for your brilliant mind and excellent grades. People had the impression that you were smart, and had always thought luck was on their side when you made your appearance to their team. You enjoyed that, the feeling of being admired and respected. That was the motivation to keep your grades top-notch, to stay as the model student. You wouldn’t dare stain your shining reputation. Sick? Doesn’t matter, you’ll miss out on your lessons, and you’ll miss 20% percent of your attendance. Being behind anyone annoys you, or more like scares you, because you know your parents are going to be asking questions on why you weren’t top of the class. It’s frustrating, because you give your all in lessons anyways. 

So, having an opportunity to be with your brother more elated you, easing your nerves of attending this new school, a new chapter in your life. You still felt nervous, the social anxiety getting to you, but hopefully there’ll be people you could get along with, right? Despite all the names, people still liked talking to you, interacting with you like a normal person. You’re surprised how you managed to fit in, because you were quite behind in terms of trends and other popular things due to your parents restricting the apps on your phone. Remembering that you weren’t an outcast, you continued walking to your school with your brother with slight confidence. The scenery was making you forget about those kinds of situations anyway, for the breathtaking autumn leaves caught your eye. The vivid colours of orange, yellow and green made you feel calm and relaxed, enjoying the joyful splatters of paint that swirled across the blue canvas you were portrayed in. The sunshine added to the beauty, making things look so much more aesthetic. 

It was just a normal school building, but knowing that this is a new start excited you. New school, new classmates, and possibly new friends. You happily strided through the school, forgetting that you needed to find your classroom. Luckily, helping you was one of Daichi’s priorities, and he pulled you by the collar before dragging you to the correct corridor. You noticed that the people on your floor weren’t that tall, until you saw a big, blue-haired giant with an orange shrimp. The contrast intimidates you, and you almost quickly shake it off.

Almost.

You, from the corner of your eye as you watched the pair argue past you, saw Daichi looking at them for a second too long. That sparked the curiosity in you, lips parting to ask a question, but that couldn’t even be asked because you, now, have reached the door of your class. Daichi checks the time, and his rushed manner gives you the impression that he had somewhere to be. He sighs, placing his hands on your shoulder, “Y/n, I know you’ll do just fine. But, if you need me, I’m on the third floor, the last classroom in the corridor. I got to go now, class is going to start. I’ll meet you after school at the gym. Good luck!” He says before fast walking through the corridor. You look at your class, First day, gotta do well. You were relieved when no one seemed to pay attention to your entrance, busy talking to one another. You scanned the room, looking for a decent empty seat and-

HANG ON, THE SEAT IN THE BACK CORNER NEXT TO THE WINDOW IS EMPTY!? You thought the people were crazy for letting such a seat be vacant. Nevertheless, you claimed the area as yours, setting out your equipment before looking outside, waiting for your teacher to come.

“Hi, um…” An unknown voice reaches out to you. You hum in acknowledgement of his presence, focusing on finishing the last bits of your notes. But honestly, if only you looked at the owner, would you have focused your attention on something so much better, so much worthwhile. He notices this, and smiles, sitting in the chair from the desk ahead, letting you finish. He knows how important studying is, being studious himself. 

You continued for a minute or so, stretching your body before tidying up. You had almost forgotten the extra person, who was so damn quiet.

“I assume you’re done, Miss Sawamura?”

Finally, you snap your head at the man, and never did you think you would lay your eyes on someone so perfect. He was a beautiful mix of cute and sexy, and his voice went straight to your clothed womanhood. Not to mention that mole next the left side of his warm brown eyes, and his fluffy silver hair. His body was incredible, sneaking a glance at the unbuttoned area of his white shirt. He was everything you could’ve asked for.

“I love you.” You sighed dreamily, catching the boy off-guard.

“H-Huh, can you repeat that?” He acts innocently, knowing damn well what he heard. 

“I-I said, ‘Yeah, I am.’” What a pathetic lie you thought I couldn’t even act it out properly… “But, anyways, why do you ask?” 

“Oh, Daichi asked me to collect you. He’s busy with the team right now.” He answers. “By the way, I’m Koushi Sugawara. I’m the vice-captain of Karasuno, the official setter andddd your brother’s best friend!” He says proudly, boasting about all his achievements. He laughs when he sees your gleaming eyes, your figure that’s amazed by how blessed he is. “C’mon, let’s go to the gym, and there we can see Daichi.”

“HUH?!” Shouts a very offended and confused Sugawara, “WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’M NOT THE OFFICIAL SETTER ANYMORE?”.

Daichi sighs, tired by repeating the same thing, “Suga, the first-year setter is really talented. Though you have experience, he’s just…” He thinks of the right word, wary of Sugawara’s furious glare. Instead, he just leaves it like that, unfinished.

“What about me being vice-captain?” He asks agitatedly, hoping he’ll agree to that since Sugawara’s a role model after all.

“Suga, you’re almost on the same level as crazy as Nishinoya and Tanaka…” 

“I’M SMART THOUGH, AND I ALWAYS BEHAVE WELL!” He reasons, hands flying about in the air.

“What you’re doing right now says otherwise. And plus, Ennoshita is a good choice too. He could actually be the vice-captain instead.” Daichi crushes Sugawara’s heart, stretching his body, unbothered by the silver boy’s sad look. 

“The best friend’s bit is true…right?” The poor boy mumbles, but loud and clear enough to hear. 

“I dunno.” Your brother jokes, but Sugawara took it personally. He starts being emotional, moody and hurtful to others. You thought it would be too early to do physical contact with this angel, but you couldn’t help it. 

You wrap your hands around him, head on his shoulder, the two of you rocking gently as you both clung to each other. First time meeting, and already you two are acting like a loving couple. You gently pat his back as he finds purchase in the crook of your neck. The whole gym is quiet, everybody is too busy watching the scene that’s taking place before their eyes. 

“Suga, you can be my best friend. My sweet Sugar…” 

His ears perk up at this, a pink blush colouring his soft cheeks. He found this cute, he found you cute, and he was touched by your actions towards him. He nods his head, which is still buried in your neck, flaming hot as a result of his blushing, and hugs your waist even tighter. 

“Thank you, Angel.”

“HEY, Y/N!” Nishinoya, the grade school-looking kid, who turns out to be a year older than you, shouts, running to you, “WHAT WAS THAT, ABOUT EARLIER?!”

Tanaka chimes in too in agreement, “YEAH, YOU MADE US FEEL LIKE THE SINGLE ASSES WE ARE.” 

They reenact the scene -horribly- as you stood there, awkwardly watching a summary of what had happened just a few hours ago. You thought it was yesterday, for it was a midnight blue sky instead of the ombre of oranges, pinks and blues with the blazing sphere raised in the air. You circle around a nearby lamppost, distancing yourself from the herd of animals as you wait for your dearest brother to come. Checking your phone, you stare at it blankly, unsure of what to do due to boredom. Randomly, you click on the calendar app, suddenly being reminded of Suga’s birthday. 

“Y/n!” Sugawara calls, waving his hand in the slightly cold night air. He wore a blue scarf and a black jacket, nose, cheeks and ears having a dash of pink. When he got closer to you, he enveloped you into his arms, pissing off Daichi. 

“Ugh, enough with this ‘couple’ activity, let’s go home…” Daichi groans out.

Home. Gosh, with how perfect the day was did you forget that your parents existed. Did you forget you can’t have a boyfriend? Crushes were allowed, but not boyfriends. Your mother clearly stated you can only have a boyfriend when you’ve finished your studies. Man, and you decided to take uni, so it’ll take until after 20 years or so…

As you two linked arms under the gentle light of the mysterious moon, you continued to dread what would happen if you and Suga really got together. Because, right now, it’s more like Suga’s doing this as your best friend. 

Hah, there’s no way he’ll like me, right?

Is this first love at sight?

When Sugawara first saw you, it was when you were on the stands, little you cheering your brother and his team. As Sugawara made his way to serve, a wave of panic crashed into him, losing his self-composure and staring ahead to the many people who eyed him, including you. Luckily, you managed to save him right before the referee blew the whistle for him to start:

“Sugawara-san!” You shouted, “Don’t feel scared, everyone on your side of your court is your teammates, and teammates help each other, not hate each other!” 

Maybe it was at that moment did Sugawara want to stay by your side. He suddenly saw you in a different light now; just you two in a light, before an opening was seen by him. 

Wait, did she just let me see the best place to serve?

As the whistle blew, Sugawara looked at you and the spot one last time, before closing his eyes and hitting the ball. He didn’t know which team got a point, for everyone was shouting. But, when he heard your voice, you became crystal clear.

“Way to go, Koushi!!” You giggle happily, clapping your hands in such a joyful manner. He was so happy you were there, but he wished you could’ve come to more games. 

Hang on, can I make her come to more games?

He tries to think of a plan, before he realised it would be incredibly simplistic, now that Daichi told him an important piece of information.

“Haha, Suga! You know the girl that cheered you on? That was my sister, Y/n.” 

He laughed internally for how things were going the way he liked it. If you were his sister, then he could see you more by using Daichi as an excuse. Oh, and the two boys were going to the same school: Karasuno. Knowing all this, he knew he just had to wait…just a little longer.

And now that time has come. He knew that you probably forgot him, because it was quite some time ago. However, now he’ll take every opportunity he can to spend time with you, whether it be through hanging out with you at break, giving you lunch boxes at lunch, or bringing you to the gym. Anything with you will satiate his hunger for you.

Simply put, he liked you – too much.

“Hey, we need to talk.” States the elder, sitting on your bed as you spun in your chair. He had a serious look on his face, causing you to straighten your back and look at him. He deeply exhales, “Whatever you’re doing with Suga, stop it. I won’t hesitate to tell our parents.” 

That alone made you livid. You burned with such anger, so much it broke the scales. He’s even threatening you? The fuck? You sometimes had thought lowly of your brother, especially when you were fazed by wrath, but never did you expect him to be such a dick. 

“How fucking dare you.” You cursed through gritted teeth, your self-control on the edge of disaster. Your knuckles turned pale-white, eyes darkened with fury as you stared at the bastard. “You know damn well how bad my life is, yet you won’t bother helping me when I see the light?” 

“That light’s not supposed to be Sugawara’s – in our parents’ eyes, I mean.” 

“So what, you gonna act all good and treat me like shit too?” You wouldn’t even try showing an ounce of respect at this point. 

“Firstly, I don’t like the language you’re using. Secondly, I’m just trying to protect you. You know the rules, there’s no point in breaking them.” He reasons.

“Don’t protect me, not when I’ve finally found a reason to be happy.” You said coldly, staring into his soul with such emotion. 

“You can’t keep that reason if our parents find out.” 

“Then they can go and fuck themselves for all I care.” You said bluntly before facing your desk, touching up on some notes from class. He sighs, knowing it’s utterly pointless to try and help such a stubborn sister. 

“Don’t come to me when you fall into despair. This was your choice, I was only trying to save you.” 

November.

It’s the month of the Inter-High Preliminaries, where other volleyball teams fight to go to the Nationals. The team has been training hard, getting experience from practise matches. They used it well and have managed to defeat the Iron Wall of Date Tech, yet it just wasn’t enough to beat the powerhouse school: Aoba Johsai. 

Kageyama, the tall, blue-haired giant, was stressed beforehand about that very match. Their setter, Oikawa, was better overall in some things, even winning the ‘Best Setter Award’. The two setters went to the same team: Kitagawa Daiichi. To Kageyama, Oikawa was a role model, a person to look up to. 

Oikawa was different. Instead, he looked to Kageyama as a person to beat, to look down upon. You see, when Oikawa was the only best setter in the team, he was relied on a lot, being the control cell tower. However, his abilities started going into a declining process, affecting the team in general. So, in his eyes, who made it worse? Young Tobio Kageyama. 

Kageyama had been playing volleyball in elementary school. When he joined Kitagawa Daiichi, many were surprised by his good sets. So, often, he would replace Oikawa, making the elder sit on the bench, fuming.

It drove him to just practice, practicing until he was better, until he got stronger. It led to Iwaizumi having to knock some sense into him each time, for Oikawa was overworking himself, and losing his self-control. An example of this is when Oikawa was practicing his serves, something Kageyama wished to do. Asking his elder for advice, he approached Oikawa, asking if he could teach him how to do his amazing jump serves. However, he viewed Kageyama as a monster, a monster like Ushiwaka – the ace of Shiratorizawa. So, he attempted to punch him right there and then. Why? Because he was afraid, he knew Kageyama had potential, enough to beat him. 

That’s how Oikawa improved for the better. How he was able to use all that training to beat his underclassmen. He may seem cocky, but really, he’s humble. He knows his strengths and weaknesses and tries to improve. That’s how he was able to bring out the best of his players in his sets. That's right, he was always able to make his team stronger, probably from his experience of improving and understanding himself.

 He’s loved by many, especially girls, but he’s never really found the one. 

Until you appeared.

There: a sweet girl who isn’t like those noisy little fangirls. A humble person like himself. He grew an interest in you, and, through annoying Hinata and Kageyama, brought himself to you. 

“Hello there,” He gave a flirtatious smile, “what’s your name, pretty?”

You couldn’t lie: he was handsome. That tall height, the hair, his looks - he was another beautiful boy. But, there’s a problem – what about Sugawara? He was basically your first crush, someone you would die for. Moreover, you said he was your happiness. But what about Oikawa? What about the very man who’s asking your name in such a sexy manner? 

Wait, but I’m not Suga’s girlfriend, so he has no control over me.

Wrong. Sugawara believes that he can control you, and wouldn’t mind getting rid of the problem that’s blocking his way into becoming your forever. You should’ve been smarter if you wanted the poor handsome man to live, because now Sugawara’s gonna eliminate the problem – and fast.

“I’m Y/n…Y/n Sawamura.” 

Ah, Sawamura as in their captain’s family name?

“Oh, are you Daichi’s sister? I never knew he had one…” His eyes drift off to the floor, before smiling and meeting yours again, “That won’t stop me from asking you out though-”

“What are you doing with my girl?” Sugawara asks coldly, eyes piercing his soul. It gave you the chills, the way Sugawara looked so scary, like he was mental. Oikawa was taken aback by this, eyes blinking in confusion,

“You have a boyfriend? Mr. Refreshing is your boyfriend?” He looks back at the two of you. You didn’t want to answer, because you didn’t really know what kind of relationship you are in with Sugawara. You guys said you were best-friends, yet you two never really acted like one without romantic feelings. 

But you didn’t need to put everything on the line right now, for Sugawara brushed by him and dragged you away. That firm grip made your hand ache, and you begged for him to stop. Only until you guys got away from the crowd did he finally speak…and change. When you hissed in pain when trying to make your hand move, Sugawara got on his knees and started kissing it, saying his apologies in a chant, looking up at you with doe eyes. You’re shocked by the contrast, how could he have switched everything about him so quickly? Your bodies press as he brings you in for a hug, stroking your hair with his hand and the other rubbing your back in small circles.

“I’m so sorry, Y/n…Just don’t hang out with other guys, ok?” 

Fuck. It was so calm and gentle the way he said his subtle threat. It was so calm and gentle yet those words itself choked you, making you feel trapped. It didn’t feel as good, for it was suffocating the way Sugawara wanted to be with you 24/7. You were bewildered with yourself: do you like this or hate it? You’re not pushing him away, yet it feels weird. 

You hear Hinata calling both of your names, looking for you guys. You two separate yourselves from the hug, coming out of the abandoned corridor and following Hinata to the courts. 

Just before the game started, Oikawa said to you,

“Hey, pretty, if I win this match, you have to go on a date with me, ok?” He didn’t even bother letting you answer, running out of the doors and joining his team.

33-31. Who were the victors? Was it the devastated team that fell silent and on the floor in despair, or the standing powerhouse team that cheered in victory of defeating the ‘wingless crows’? Oikawa smirked in your direction, knowing he’ll get a date with you.

Or so he thought. 

“That bastard…” Sugawara mutters,

“I’m gonna kill him.”

“Y/n~” Oikawa waves at you as both your teams meet up with each other. The crows express their annoyance and anger to the thriving plants, and they reciprocate it back. 

“Oikawa,” Daichi forces a fake smile on his face, “what makes you say my sister’s name, but less know her?” He questions, with Sugawara pressing his shoulder more firmly against yours. 

“Why, we met each other. And,” His eyes look at yours, “remember the deal? Give me your number, I’ll text you when we meet again.” He rummages in his bag for his phone, while Daichi yells at him.

“WHAT DEAL DID YOU MAKE WITH MY SISTER?” He looks at you, fuming, “WHAT DEAL DID YOU MAKE WITH HIM? WHAT DO YOU MEAN ABOUT ‘MEET AGAIN’?” 

Oikawa was first to take a step out of his line, going through your bag until he got your phone. Everyone just stood there, shocked by this rude awakening. After successfully obtaining your number, he winks at your team, waving his phone in the air before heading off with his teammates, the victors. 

“Ah, I forgot.” He aims this directly at Sugawara, 

“Beat ya to it.”

Sugawara wasn’t going to have this. He stares at the disappearing figure as he mentally foreshadowed the upcoming events very subtly, 

“We’ll see who gets the last laugh, who’ll stand victorious in gaining Y/n’s love.” 

 “Y/n.” Daichi started, the urge to scream at you was in favour of winning, “why did Mr. Oikawa know your name, tell us about some kind of deal, and even have your number?” 

You wanted to cry, overwhelmed by the events that happened in less than a day. 

“Daichi, I think Y/n should stay with me.” Sugawara stated nonchalantly, as if he didn’t abuse his right as his best friend just to have you all for himself. Daichi nods in agreement, thinking he should trust Sugawara since the silver-haired boy was smart overall. 

“Yeah. Y/n, you’ll stay with Sugawara when we get back to the hotel.” He gets inside of the bus as the others hop in. You sit in the window seat at the back, head pressed against the window as Sugawara sat next to you, taking sneaky glances as you look at the scenery. Finally, you shift your head onto Sugawara’s shoulder, the two of you talking as everyone on the bus fell into a deep slumber.

“Suga,” You play with his hands, “I want you to cuddle me later.”

This was so unexpected for the both of you, because you never really asked for these things. However, you felt like you needed a hug, comfort, and that only Sugawara can only provide that. 

“Of course, Sugar…” He puts his chin on your head, “I’ll be the one who does these things to you,” His hand strokes your face as you try to fall asleep, 

“I’ll be the one you only gonna need.”

It was a good few hours on the bus before you guys reached the hotel. Everyone stands outside, yawning in fatigue after a long and tiring day. You cling onto Sugawara for support, to which he willingly helps as Mr. Takeda gives out his speech.

“You all did well. Just because you didn’t win doesn’t mean you weren’t good.” He was about to continue before Kageyama cut him off.

“But we weren’t good enough. Us losing proves that.” 

Sugawara whispers a ‘Wait for me for a few seconds, Y/n.’ as he helps you stand up, before marching over to Kageyama with annoyance. 

“Stop being negative! That’s what makes us feel bad. We did our best, and it’s better to lose proudly because of how hard we fought rather than not giving our all. You need to understand that this isn’t the last, and that there are many opportunities! All we need is to rest, reflect and get ready to improve. Stop dwelling over the sad stuff and focus on what to do next!” 

Kageyama was about to resume his degrading speech, but Sugawara prevented him from doing so. 

“Negativity….Be gone!” He jabs Kageyama in the chest, earning a pained yelp from the official setter. Everyone laughs at this, with Asahi adding, “Yep, I know how that feels like, Kageyama..” to the fun. The team settled down inside, eating a hearty meal despite crying all over again, and, now, prepared to go to sleep. You shared a room with Sugawara, plopping down next to him as you gave him a big hug. The two of you stayed like that until your phone vibrated, holding a message. 

“I really wanna see you again, but I wanna make things special. I know it doesn’t seem like it, but it will be my first ever date, and so I wanna make it memorable. Meet me at 7pm at this hill on Christmas Day. See you, pretty.”

“He wants you on such a nice day, huh…” Sugawara sighs, “Do you want to go?”

“I kind of need to though,” 

He smiles, “I’ll make sure you won’t have to.” 

“Really?” You were shocked and confused, how could he?

“Mhm,” He pulls you into a hug again, “you’ll never have to see him,

 ever again.”

December 25th

Date (Meeting) with Oikawa. 

You stared at the reminder for the day, feeling quite nervous about…everything. This was your first date, yet you wished it could’ve been with someone you felt close to, someone who felt like a boyfriend. Oikawa was just a victorious gambler, winning the grand prize of taking you out. He did seem quite handsome, but that was pretty much it for his first impression. 

Ignoring the upcoming event, you go downstairs to eat lunch, surprised that Sugawara was there. He might have given off your entrance to Daichi with his eyes, and you wished you stayed upstairs just for a little longer. You swear you could’ve passed out right there and then when you saw Daichi’s hell-like figure, his anger spreading throughout him like flames. The way you couldn’t see his eyes, how you couldn’t even hear him breathe; it all terrified you, leaving you in a petrified state as you forgot how to breathe yourself. 

Suddenly, you were in a world of black.

[Now playing: Lucifer – Enhypen ]

You gasp, taking a deep breath as you wake up, realising you were back in your room. Making sure you weren’t in a dream, you check your phone – 20:13. 

Geez, I’ve been knocked out for this long?

Feeling thirsty, you get out to get a drink, before the feeling that you’ve forgotten about something haunts you. 

What is today?

You check your phone again, December 25th – Christmas. But what could you have forgotten? Was it you didn’t text your friends with merry greetings, give them the presents, or eat a Christmas meal? It was bothering you, until you focused on the time. Time; only then did it hit you: you were supposed to meet up with Oikawa. Checking the messages app, you press on his contact, shocked when you haven’t received a message. Hearing the frightened screams of your mother, you rush downstairs, listening to the TV as your family panics.

“Good evening. Police have sent warnings to the people of the Miyagi Prefecture in particular to watch out as Aoba Johsai Setter, Tooru Oikawa, was found dead near a hill today. Many are surprised by the sudden death, and experts have said that this was an act of murder. Investigations are taking place as they try to find the murderer responsible for the murder. This has brought devastation to everyone as they try to indigest the news. 

This was the case of the Christmas Day Murder.

Tooru Oikawa, may you rest in peace.”

Without knowing, you cry as you felt an immense feeling of guilt, pity and regretfor the tragic death of someone who was genuinely nice. You wished you met up with him, gave him his prize, because maybe, just maybe then he would have lived to see another day. 

“Oikawa…” You whimper in despair, “I’m so sorry…” You kneel as pictures and videos of himself are played on the screen, regret evident with the crystal tears that cried for him.

Ah, how good that felt! 

Wipes himself clean as he, too, watches the news. He cackles, “GUESS WHO GOT THE LAST LAUGH NOW, OIKAWA.” He closes his eyes while grinning, taking himself back to that moment…

[ Now playing: My Love Mine All Mine – Mitski ]

Shit, I hope I won’t be late! He hoped, driving to the hill as fast as he could. He was so excited, occasionally checking his face every now and then, jumping out of his car and running up only to be met with the natural world. His joyous smile quickly faded as he looked around, sadly finding out you haven’t arrived yet. He sighs in disappointment, lips in a pout as he felt that he got here so fast for nothing – that he wanted, at least. Maybe he shouldn’t have come at all, so that he could have a chance to avoid the Harbinger of Bad News. 

Where’s Y/n? I miss her so much…

Hearing the sound of cracking twigs, he spins around almost immediately, your name slipping past his lips as he beamed. Yet, nothing was in his view. Without warning, he got strangled from behind, the owner of the arms that choked Oikawa still unknown, and slowly cut off his air supply.

The fuck!? How could someone have gotten behind me so fast? 

As the victim rolls his eyes back to his skull, his limbs start to weaken, giving up on fighting as he stands between the lines of life and death. Seeing that he was nearly as dead, the host grabs his knife, stabbing Oikawa’s body repeatedly until he was drained of blood, and when the stabber would be covered in the red ‘poison’. Looking at the bloody and scarred dead body that lay helplessly on the floor, he gave a very loud laugh, cutting away bits of his hair with his knife to keep as a trophy.

Walking away from the crime scene, he hums a song to commemorate the achievement:

“‘Cause my love is mine, all mine…”

“Y/n, why are you crying…” Daichi asks through sniffles, having a congested nose due to his endless release of tears. 

“The fact he was all alone…all alone while waiting just for me…Oh, I feel so horrible. I shouldn’t have been so judgemental of him, of his actions.” 

“I guess that was the price of overreacting…I think I got ahead of myself. I’m sorry, Y/n,” He looks up at the ceiling to gesture his apology to Heaven, “I’m sorry, Oikawa. You were a great captain, teammate, setter, and person as a whole. I’ll dedicate my plays to you.” He pats you on the back before heading to his room. 

“This was TV Asahi, good night.” 

Commercial came on, and so you switched off the electronic as you made your way to your bedroom, sitting at your desk. Your mind was just full of Oikawa, and you wanted to do something for him. Since you enjoyed drawing, you took out your pencil case and a sheet of paper as you drew the man himself. Due to never really having a normal meetup with him, you talked to the drawing as if it was Oikawa, secretly wishing he was in your room right now, whether it be as a living human or conscious ghost. 

It went on for hours, staring at the finished product before shedding one final tear of the day. It was nearly midnight, so you bid drawing Oikawa goodnight, tucking yourself in your bed covers as you attempted to go to sleep. 

[Now playing: Rises the Moon – Liana Flores ]

Do it for Oikawa…Do it for Oikawa…

Is this what guilt does to people? It haunts them? Does it manipulate them into thinking it was their fault? It made it hard to fall asleep, because he was supposed to wake up into another day too. 

This wasn’t what Sugawara wanted, and he wouldn’t accept this outcome. As he looked at your restless figure through the hidden camera he placed when lying you in bed earlier, he slammed his hand on the table, messing up his hair in frustration as he saw that you didn’t check your phone. He sent you text messages, one asking if he could come over to comfort you, but unsuccessfully couldn’t make it to your bed, by your side. 

He touches the screen, hand touching your pixelated figure as he wished you were in his arms, sleeping soundly under the moonlight. Don’t mistake Sugawara as a vicious, manipulative killer. He just loves you so much he yearns to have the exact same amount back. The thought of you caring for someone gave him the impression that he hasn’t got 100%. Therefore, he resorts to insane methods, such as death, to make you have one less person to care about. He just wants to experience the full package of you all for himself. For him, that isn’t selfish at all. Rather, he views it as a committed relationship between the two parties.

If it weren’t for any third parties, you would get a lover boy who just solely wants to make you happy. No death, violence, blood, but daisies and a refreshing breeze in your lives. 

They say that you needed a traumatic backstory if you ever became a monster, yet why didn’t he have one? His childhood was full of laughter and joy, as if he was blessed with the sunshine forever shining down on him. Why and how did his moon cover his sun will be left in mystery, but if it happened because of you, it could be because of love. A weird, deadly, but beautiful love. 

After sunny days, when the sun disappears from the sky,

Rises the moon…

[Now playing: I wanna be yours – Arctic Monkeys]

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Y/n: Please come over.

You stare at your glowing white phone screen in the dark. Falling asleep seemed like a challenge, still disturbed the news of today. Having shivers down your spine, you needed warmth from someone, like Sugawara. 

Since waiting seemed to take a long period of time, your heavy lids start to come at a close. However, the last thing you see won’t be an empty space on the bed, because, just on cue, Sugawara makes it to your bedroom window, which you lazily unlocked. 

“Sorry to keep you waiting, Sugar.” He snuggles up beside you, arms around your body as he strokes your hair. 

“Suga…

What are we?

You try to keep yourself awake as you share your thoughts, “It’s just…the way we act to each other, what we’re doing right now, the nicknames…everyone who passes by us would think we were a couple.” 

“Were we not?” 

Wait, so for the past few months, we weren’t best friends?

“Y/n, I thought you would’ve known by now. I thought you liked me too.” 

Taking your hands in his, he confesses with his genuine love he has for you,

“You know, you make me sing songs all about you. Here’s one I hope you understand,

He looks at the feminine moon before diving his gaze to you,

“

My Angel, The Sun,

Won’t you find me

Loving, Attractive,

Sweet like honey?

Because all I ever really felt

Was bliss sent from the heavens above,

And that bliss was you.

I never really understood

What made me be so drawn to you

I just may just be, a little mad

In love with you, my obsession with you

Defied all others, even if they say ‘I love you to the moon,’

Because mine may not even exist

In this universe that may have a limit.

Darling, I just want to give you the best

Because you deserve happiness.

If they say, ‘I want you too,’

It got so scared because I don’t want to

Lose you by these ugly men

I can treat you better

All you need to do is put your trust in me

I promise I’ll give you magic.

I’m a Lucifer

But don’t worry, I won’t take away your wings.

You can go up to heaven

Just make sure you fly your way back to me,

I promise you, I’ll be all you need.

My love.”

A tear of affection escapes your weary eyes as you hear the heart of Sugawara through his words. Simple, but powerful that wins your feelings. 

“I love you too, dearest Koushi.” You say just as you press your lips against his in a passionate kiss. Nothing sexual, nothing for pleasure, just pure love that the two of you hold for each other. Though you wished the minutes lasted for hours, your bodies couldn’t handle a huge amount of time without breathing, and heavy pants heat the room. You untangle your hand from his, putting one on his face as you traced over his facial features, resting it on his cheek once you felt satisfied. He looks at you from above, taking in your image as if it was his last time seeing you. You both felt that being in each other’s embrace forever was enough, and you two wouldn’t ever complain. 

And that’s how you cuddled in bed with the murderer, who made sure to rid himself of Oikawa’s blood when taking a quick, celebratory shower. He found it cute how you never thought about the possibility of him being the killer that’s rising in the trending searches, clinging onto his body with a series of emotions, but mostly to seek comfort.

Poor Oikawa, if only the two lovebirds had made their feelings clear to each other the man would have possibly lived. 

But, perhaps it was the death of Oikawa that caused a slight disturbance in your smooth flowing relationship. 

Y/n, why must I chase you again when I did this for love?

You’re lucky, because I can wait for what will be mine, always,

My dearest Y/n, my sweet angel. You’re all mine.

𝑇𝑎𝑔𝑔𝑖𝑛𝑔: @rinbowaman @heeslomll @dr0wnme0ut @reesareads @pshazez @potatohoon @sungvrhs @dollyyun @diorsyun @emi-en @velvetkisscs @hoondrop @jaylaxies (lmk if you want to be added!)

[moonlight-prose]

𝑭𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒆𝒓 𝑪𝒆𝒍𝒆𝒃𝒓𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏🌙

a/n: i had no clue what to do for the follower celebration because i have so many requests sitting in my inbox already from sleepovers. but i decided why not do something fun! first a quick note down below because i'm fucking emotional.

a massive thank you to those who read my works and like them and decided you liked them enough to follow. when i started writing on tumblr way back in 2020 i didn't think i'd hit this point. you guys are amazing and i'm very happy to have my little corner of the internet to spend time hanging out with y'all.

𝑾𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒏𝒈𝒆 1/27 - 2/10

i've created a list of favorite lines from shows, songs, and movies. but the twist is...you get to use the prompt! for whatever you want. moodboard, fics, art, however you want to use it. i've picked my own but i haven't added it to the list. i hope you decide to join by all means no pressure!

when you've decided what you want then just shoot me an ask and i'll cross out the line! also feel free to write it with whoever you want but please tag me so i can reblog/boost it here!

“You want me to make you some coffee?”

“You know me better than anyone. you always have.”

“I...want to lie here.”

“I know who I am when I'm alone. I'm something else when I see you.”

“I’ve known the warmth of your doorways. Through the cold, I'll find my way back to you.”

“Honey please, try to love me. My love will never die.”

“Nothing fucks with my baby.”

“I’d suffer hell if you’d tell me what you’d do to me tonight.”

“We could die here. It's an option. it's not my choice, but it's an option.”

“If you need a second chance you can take mine.”

“Come and kiss me and let’s forget.”

“Wouldn't it be awful if we fell in love again?”

“You’ve fallen for me — completely. you’ve got me in your dreams.”

“I wanted it to be you, I wanted it to be you so badly.”

"To me. You are perfect."

𝑶𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 1/27 - 2/2

if you don't wish to participate in the writing challenge, then this one is for you! below are a few fun games i have done before with sleepovers and some new ones. this will close earlier than the challenge, but feel free to send in however many you want!

🥀cym! send me a concept and i'll cast my beloved mutuals in a role.

🌙moodboard! drop a character + theme (and or au) in the inbox and i'll make you a moodboard.

🍷personal moodboard. mutuals if you would like a cute moodboard of vibes then let me know!

🚬send me a character + vibe and i'll make a mini playlist. (mutuals if you want one based on you i'll be happy to do that!)

💌 headcannons/drabbles! hop in to talk characters and concepts and whatever else you want!

[moshieee]

Hello it is I, random anon who does not know you and has never interacted with you before, what is your opinion of your mutuals?

Oh hi @bixell-pixell I'll include you even if we're not mutuals I think you're pretty chill all things considered

That's kinda it idk you that well

Anyways

You didn't specify so I'm going to list all my mutuals in the order of oldest to newest on my following page that I remember sorry of I missed anyone and for the @ s

*inhales*

@e-the-village-cryptid (I don't have a tag for e yet but it would probably just be E)

Not only the first person who I became friends with here but also the first one I ever started sharing my stories with, even if we don't talk too much I'm glad Every time we do and I see them on my dash, (they bring some of my favorite posts and when I do send posts sometimes I mix up and send them their own reblogs) I'm so glad we're still friends, thanks for letting me ramble about stuff for 6 hours hehe

@jaqofallgenders (no tag for jaq yet either)

my in person friend and the longest friendship I've ever had with someone, love you 🫶. I'll be more specific on Monday if our ADHD doesn't kick in and make us both forget

@strawberry-seal77 (seal-berry!!!)

Hi hi hi yellows my friend 👋 the person I consider to be the second ever friend I made on here, a lovely person as well and wait waaa and an amazing artist too 👀??? Love you silly goofball and the amazing posts and jokes you have we should chat more often I thinkith.

@rabid-mercenary16 (Rabid jumpscare)

Hey hey hey .... BWAMP! Hope you feel better soon

I probably have the most to say about Rabid but all try to make it a bit shorter. besides being the first artist to do art jokes and include me, with we also became mutuals and interacting around a time when my life started to get a lot better. Even if she's not the only factor in that I definitely associate her with stuff improving, and she did play a big factor in it (I already explained a lot on my Valentine's Day gift to her and the others). Also she's just an awesome person to spend time with and be goofy, amazing sense of humor and I just love being friends with such an awesome person and artist.

@dia-smthidk (Dia fren)

I'm assuming you don't want a bowl of soup

I also said a lot about them in my Valentine's Day gift, but we've become closer friends sense then even if we don't get to chat as much as I'd like to. I relate a lot and am surprised how we have so much in common. Amazing artist and person as well and I wish we could hang out more, idc if they think they're bringing down the mood when/if they bring stuff up about irl, and maybe I won't figure out their timezone but oh well, please take care of yourself gender sibling.

@bunnybunnsowo (BUN BUN BROTHER!!)

little brother 🫶🫶💝💞🫶✨👋❤️!!!

(I could have sworn we became mutuals before Dia?)

another person I shared a lot about with the Valentine's Day gift, I love you my little brother! Seriously one of the kindest people I've met and I'm so glad they have bug in his life. Bun deserves the world and they keep sending me opposum images!!! Gona die from cuteness and his kindness one of these days istg

@spookykittyzzz (greaah why don't I have a tag for you???)

A very kind person and artist I don't know too much sense we're not that close yet but love the few chats we have had so far. Hope we get to hang out more even if I'm awful at reaching out to others and saying hi.

@glitchyk (goop buddies)!!

Nooo the parallels

One of the first people who was interested to deep dive into my creations and ask about my stories and worlds They're probably competing with Rabid with how much I have to say about her/silly. Seriously it's incredible how much we have in common and now I get to share and collaborate our sonas stories together it's amazing. And as someone once said "you can yap for hours". I love how creative and clever they are, I just wish they would be kinder to herself. One day I'll make glichy see how awesome she is.

@unfunnyaceartist (Floridian disadvantage) I feel like I should change that

When I say I was shookith when ace asked to be friends I mean I was shookith first person so show up and ask that (the others kinda just happened). Amazing artist and don't believe her lies she is funny. I'm so heckn glad we're friends., love the goofy and silly idc if she's a bit of a simp they've helped me a lot start to understand slang and references I'm supposed to understand shhshsh (such is the curse of how I grew up) we need to make our mafia sonas interact at some point I can already imagine the chaos /silly

@neptunestoast (plushy slime)

Hugs hugs hugs*

Trying my best not to baby talk I swear. amazing person first person to show up and be like "hey I Wana do something for you and your friends". Love their humor and another gender sibling!!! Hugs for ever for as long as they're ok with it. I love their creativity as well and Noodle is so adorable. I just want to pick them up in a hug so much. Kibbity/silly

@ner5y (no tag woops ill figure something out)

What are you doing here??? How are we friends???

I was absolutely confused and startled when they followed me especially since it was during a spoons argument . Amazing artist like holy heck I wish I was allowed to curse on this blog. Their humor also took me by surprise when I got invited to the discord, and even if they doubt how well they're running it I think they're doing amazing. And I love our silly interactions like this one

@vexation-816 (chaotic ADHD buddy!!!)

Why did it take me so long to follow you istg

ADHD ADHD ADHD my buddy oh pal we both got that and it's driving us insane/silly. Love how creative he is and the ideas for his sona and character lore. Also one of the first people who shared a character they added to my nightlight au. This is getting twords the end and I'm tired of whiting so much and am on a timer oh no. But your amazing dude don't ever forget thag

@butlerbugbunny (anxiety bunny buddy)

This is why I didn't respond to the DM yet hshsh

New friend who I feel anxious talking to sometimes but a wonderful kind bunny who I'm also incredibly happy to be friends with. Love his art so much it's amazing (shoot shoot timer is going off) I'm glad he's their for bun and wish them the best I possibly can 🫶.

@lilithloves-you (lillith my be-loathed?) need to change that

Don't you dare bring up grilled cheese

Glitchys friendo who I'm also friends with now. We don't interact too much but I've sent her on missions to go hug glitchy (to help both of them feel better but shhh). I hope we become closer friends in the future.