#<- the original dialogue for this was ��turning into a man? come fuck me like one then’ | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

yinwaryuri · 6 months ago

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Okay here I come with thoughts that I'm not sure many people will be on board with, but I'm gonna share anyway because who cares! Wandee Goodday is doing a fantastic job selling characters who are ridiulous, and many of them are charming. I'm gonna talk about the guy who isn't. Charming that is.

I Think Ter Is In The Closet

And I'm only using bits from episode 4 to demonstrate this. Sorry if you need more to be convinced.

Ter is a strange character because we meet him through Wandee, when he's still up on a pedestal. That image almost immediately gets crumpled and tossed into oncoming traffic to be flattened in a rubbery, Bangkok traffic death. Dee confesses his feelings and Ter insists he's straight. He's straight. He's straight! He likes women, not men. Sorry. To make matters worse, he pulls the asshole move of just asking Dee to leave the scholarship to him.

These men have known each other for eight years. Eight fucking years and this is where things are going? If we know how much of a disaster Dee is, then it really makes me wonder what disaster side of himself Ter has (aside from what we know).

(thinking them gaaayyy thoughts) (also this weirdo doesn't listen to music while working out? no wonder he's the devil)

Ter is recalling the moment when Yak came into the hospital with flowers for Dee, called him tee-rak, and the two of them are looking at each other like. Like That.

Super normal for a hetero dude to focus on that part of his long-term colleague's life. And if he were a huge homophobe, I could understand it being a possible upset, but then he wouldn't be so close to Dee if that were the case. This is Golf Tanwarin we're being led by here.

Our Devil Doctor is pulled out of his train of thought by the appearance of a shirtless Plakao

Guys, I won't lie to you, I yelled NO aloud because for a second I thought he was going to have his come to Jesus with our favorite asexual king, and as an asexual who worships Plakao and how amazing he is, I just wasn't gonna have it!

And the first thing Ter notices? Kao is alone - specifically, he isn't accompanied as usual by his bestie Wandee. So Ter immediately interrupts his workout to question him. Kao responds that Dee's with his boyfriend now, which prompts more questioning about their relationship from Ter.

Yeah, Ter. What's it matter to you?

You turned Wandee away because you're straight. So, obviously that's a no, right? Right?

Not addressing that then. Okay. We'll just hit the skip button for that dialogue option, I guess.

As a tenured colleague and friend, that would be the natural reaction to this. Kao is a wise, wise man, and like many an asexual, he has done the work of figuring himself out while living in an allonormative world (while also recognizing he likes men! I cannot stress enough how beautifully nuanced his okay). From what he understands (and is stating for Ter to ponder), is that this would make sense for someone who doesn't harbor any other kinds of feelings toward Dee and until recently, has been on good terms with him.

But Ter doesn't get to ponder because he gets called away and immediately forced to face Dee happily walking hand in hand with Yak. It's awkward. Dee excuses himself and Yak. And then Ter's eyes foooolloooww.....

And later he gets back to his room with the number of the beast and fondly recalls when Dee used to leave snacks on his door....

(crowd goes awww)

But this guy can't help but notice while he's doing an evening workout -

Hey! There are Dee and Yak again! Being all cute in the pool! It's too coincidental! (He had not considered that his colleague works at the same place and has a similar schedule, therefore all this appropriately timed boyfriendism could only happen within that schedule)

So he has to conclude that it isn't real.

Little does Ter know that it was originally intended for YakDee to be fake boyfriends; that he'd stumbled upon the truth immediately. What he wasn't expecting was for Dee to double down not only to not be caught plotting like that, but because he's way further into his feelings for Yak than he is fully aware of.

I cannot stress how interesting it is so see this man be so obsessed over their relationship. Anyone who would call themselves a close friend or colleague would simply be happy for Dee, maybe warn him about some people who are less accepting if that were an issue, and then continue focusing on whatever it is he's doing for the scholarship. And maybe he does focus on the scholarship - we aren't shown his side of it because it's not important - but if that's true and his secondary focus is theorizing that Dee's relationship is fake? TER? WORSTIE?????

And then this happens!

Now I've seen a lot of people taking this as manipulation and I'm not going to call them wrong. It is exactly that. But I think he's also seeing if maybe he missed a chance? It wasn't that long ago that Dee was reminiscing about the past eight years together and Ter had decided the scholarship was more important than pursuing whatever thing they had between each other. Ter is realizing he doesn't want to throw either of them away, but still has his heart with the money. So he improvises a lame little plea, it's badly executed, and we get sad eyes watching Dee leave.

I would've expected him to curse under his breath, or have some sort of small scale tantrum after that interaction if he was fully planning to manipulate Dee like that. His melancholy here is what has me thinking that it wasn't well thought out, and there's a part of him who cares about his relationship with Dee and wishes it could carry on as it used to.

Ter continues to obsess. We know he'd immediately seen the story Dee posted, and it seems he's returning to it again (knowing social media habits, he's likely checked it several times in between).

CAUGHT.

Kwan, in contrast to Ter, is also Dee's colleague. She finds him and his boxer boyfriend just charming!

This line kills the entire conversation. There's very obvious tension about this subject.

To me this is where Ter has kinda said the quiet part out loud. He's more concerned about his own image. To whom? His family? His patients? Future opportunities? To himself? Not that there's nothing for Dee to be worried about (this is in Thailand where gay marriage is not legal yet, after all), but he has had a good reception of being publicly queer so far. Is that due to his queerness being more pronounced? Has Ter ridden for most of his life on being able to pass as straight because he was afraid of the consequences?

I'm gonna take a hard left for a moment, and then redirect.

There's a scene in the film To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar where a sheriff (who has had an altercation with a drag queen and is looking for her for severely homophobic reasons) sits in a saloon and essentially narrates gay erotica aloud like he's trying to process the concept of homosexuality. He's disturbed about the idea. The people around him are also disturbed by his imaginings. It almost gives the sense that his thoughts come from desire, but he's been taught too much hate about that desire to recognize it.

And this is the moment where I just felt sorry for Ter. It seems like he maybe has some deep-seated denial, and it's being overturned by everything Dee is doing. It doesn't excuse him, but shit's gotta suck. And it's clear his disturbance with the idea of Dee having gotten over any feelings for him will be hard to reckon with on top of deciding how he feels about Dee himself. P'Golf does their antagonistic and confused gays well.

#wandee goodday #wandee goodday the series #ter wandee goodday #wandee goddday meta #golf tanwarin #pod suphakorn #gmmtv series #gmmtv bl #thai series #thai bl

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chaosroid · 2 months ago

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I've talked about this before in discord servers so I might as well share my thoughts here as well. I feel like the inclusion of polyamory in BG3 was handled sloppily. Let me preface this by saying I have no issue with poly in general. Really, it's the way it was executed in this game that confuses me. More specifically, it doesn't make sense to me how the poly companions (Shadowheart and Astarion) react to certain dialogue options you can pick and the inconsistencies in characterization that come with it.

If you suggest an open relationship with Shadowheart regarding another companion, she is completely against the idea and explicitly tells you she doesn't want to be your spare lover.

Yet, shortly into act 3, her entire stance changes when it comes to Halsin and she's suddenly cool with it. And before you say "Oh well, she knows Halsin isn't a serious romantic partner so she's not worried", that's the thing, he CAN be a serious romantic partner. And one of the things you can tell her is "He wants me, and I want him. I'm not sure there's space for you and I", ultimately treating Shadowheart like, well, essentially a spare lover, and she's not only fine with it, but encourages this. Does she just not know that your relationship with Halsin can be serious? Because otherwise it feels very ooc for her.

I feel like none of this would've been an issue if SH was just written from the start to be okay in a poly relationship with every companion, instead of this flip fop where she's not okay with it for two entire acts before suddenly being okay with it in act 3 but it's weirdly exclusive to only Halsin. It's that inconsistency that lowkey bothers me.

I have similar issues with Astarion, because some of his reactions to what you can say makes no sense either. Here you have a man who just started rediscovering his sexual boundaries, but when you tell him you want to hook up with Halsin, he'll ask if it's only because he's not putting out enough. You can prove his worry correct and apparently he's okay with this (the dev notes confirm it).

We're supposed to believe he's not hurt by what you said? 'Oh gee, I finally wanna be seen for more than a sex slave but I'm totally fine with my partner fucking someone else the second I refuse sexual intimacy because of my trauma!'. It's just so in bad taste.

You can say things that go completely against what Astarion and SH would want to hear, and they'll still be like "Yep, alright! Have fun with Halsin!". This game has some of the most mature representations of sexual trauma but will then simultaneously turn around and reduce these characters to fanservice, because the people need to have their cake and eat it too I guess.

And sure, you can make the argument that they only trust Halsin with this sort of thing. But the fact that Halsin and his romance only got added late into the game because of horny fans from EA leads me to believe that the far simpler answer is that it was just tacked on last minute without much thought given to whether or not it would actually make sense. Halsin and SH don't even like each other in act 2, she honestly has more chemistry with Karlach (a companion who can actually fantasize about threesomes in her origin btw) and was smitten with her as early as act 1. But I guess for all the folks who wanted a fully wlw poly relationship, that's just not possible because your only option is a man :)

Again, I have nothing against Astarion and SH being poly. It's their jarring responses to some of Tav's dialogue options, in which I genuinely don't believe they would be okay with hearing those things nor would they respond so flippantly.

tl;dr They would not fucking say that

#shadowheart #astarion #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 critical #meta #long post #also do y'all ever notice how odd it is that the only poly companions all happen to be SA victims?#ofc that's not to say SA victims cant enjoy poly relationships obviously #but none of the non-poly companions are and it's just...hmm

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justmediocrewriting · 10 months ago

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“Eyes Open,” {v.s}

A/n: first installment of my NSFW Dialogue Prompt Special — featuring everyone’s favorite chef ❤️ I had quite a fun time writing this, and I hope that you beautiful peeps will enjoy it!

Warnings/tags: explicit sexual content, soft!sanji, but also mean!sanji, cunnilingus, first times, virgin!reader, experienced!sanji, prompt, blurb, sexualization of Taz Skylar’s (alleged) tongue piercing (its canon to me), tongue fucking, hair pulling, 100 follower NSFW dialogue prompt special

Genre: smut

Word Count: 1.8k

Pairing: Sanji x fem!reader

Prompt: “Keep your eyes open; look at me, baby.” (#1 from list)

You had no idea it could feel so good.

You didn’t know what Sanji was doing, or how; all you knew was that your pussy felt like it was melting beneath his tongue, all slick and sloppy, electric currents traveling up your hips every time your clit throbbed beneath his affections.

You’d heard talk of this, had listened when your friends gushed about the euphoria of it, but you had never once taken it to heart — you thought they were only hyping their experiences up in an attempt to look cooler. But now that you were experiencing it for yourself… it was more intense than you’d ever imagined.

Sanji’s tongue was a searing hot force against your clit, alternating between flattening against your pearl and circling it with movements that were far too skilled for him having “just a little bit of experience,” as he’d told you before; and every so often the man would switch it up by splitting your folds with the tip of his tongue, up and down, before pushing the slimy muscle just so into your pussy, pumping in and out deeper as if he were trying to spear you on it completely before returning to his original task of devouring your clit.

The sounds falling from your lips were ones you’d never once imagined yourself making; a mixture of whimpers and moans and heavy breaths, they were a symphony that harmonized with the tune of Sanji’s own muffled groans vibrating against your pussy. It was hot, your body was hot, you were tearing apart at the seams, Sanji was too fucking good with his tongue, and just what the hell was that was that warm, hardened ball you chanced a feel of from time to time, because it was zapping pleasure through you with the ferocity of some sort of hurricane —

“Open your eyes, doll.”

Sanji’s tongue had disappeared from your sex, taking it with it that searing pleasure, the loss forcing your eyes to snap open so you could level the man between your legs with a disappointed glare. The lone light turned on in the galley reflected the shine of spit and arousal smeared along Sanji’s chin and lips, which were lifted into that boyish grin that never failed to send flutters through your heart. Your brain almost completely short circuited at the sight of your own arousal glistening on that handsome face between your legs, and it took you a few embarrassing seconds to register that Sanji had spoken to you.

“Uh, what?” You asked smartly, words coming out as no more than wispy breaths. Sanji’s grin only widened and your hips nearly bucked off the counter when the man blew a stream of cold air against your overheated clit.

“You’re so sensitive, love. Does it really feel that good?”

Your skin flushed at Sanji’s antics, the bashfulness that had previously been overpowered by pleasure returning full force. Sanji knew you’d never been with another person this way, had never felt anyone’s hands, fingers, or tongue on you, had never felt the kind of pleasure that Sanji was shoving into you — it was embarrassing enough alone, and here he was teasing you about it.

Sanji ripped you from your state of silence by sliding a thick thumb between your folds, trailing from the very bottom and only stopping when the pad of his thumb reached your clit. With a spark in his eyes Sanji slowly rubbed a circle over your clit, pulling a sharp exhale of breath from between your lips as your hips trembled from the action.

“Answer me, doll.” Sanji gently commanded, the rolling timbre of his voice sliding over your body like a physical thing and demanding compliance from you. You couldn’t help but nod with a small, breathy, “yes.”

Sanji’s gentle expression turned downright devilish, the sight sending mixed signals of panic and arousal straight to your brain stem, and your heart thundered erratically with anticipation when Sanji leaned closer to your sex — that masterful tongue was so close to your clit now, if only Sanji would have the clemency to put it there.

“Show me how good it feels, love. Let me see the look in your eyes when you cum on my tongue.” Sanji growled, hands shooting up to wrap his forearms around your thighs and hold your lower body in place. Your breath halted in your lungs and you had barely a moment’s preparation before Sanji was diving into your pussy again, tongue and lips devouring every inch of it like a man starved.

“Fuck!” You hissed out as your clit was assaulted by a barrage of flicks and circles, pleasure zipping through your lower half much more intensely than before. Had Sanji been holding back before, or something? Sanji’s eyes were endless pools of deep ocean as he stared into yours, bottom half of his face completely hidden by your pubis, and your gut clenched almost uncomfortably with the familiar build of an orgasm.

The atmosphere had changed instantaneously; it was heavy, hot, full of tension and desire to a degree it hadn’t possessed before, and you could feel everything now.

You could feel every small physical detail of Sanji’s tongue as it laved over your cunt; the veins, the bumps, the ridges, that fucking ball. You could feel the tip of Sanji’s nose rubbing across the skin above your clit as he subtly shook his head, his groans and grunts vibrating your clit with a tortuous intensity, each and every sensation winding the coil inside your gut tighter and tighter.

“That’s it, baby,” Sanji breathed against your cunt, voice thick with arousal, “keep looking at me like that, fuck.”

Despite the flush it was bringing to your skin, you simply couldn’t tear your eyes away from Sanji’s — you couldn’t stop watching as he ate you, as his eyes fluttered every so often from the taste of you, those baby blues nearly swallowed by blankets of black. It felt almost as if Sanji was getting more pleasure than you were, his moans deep and consistent, tongue haphazardly shoving into your cunt and twisting. There was less grace about his movements, but the desperation and pure sloppy hunger within them made up for it entirely.

“Oh, my gods, Sanji,” you whimpered, head becoming fuzzy as that coil continued to wind, pleasure and pure passion now taking control of your body as you brought a hand down to grip a fistful of Sanji’s hair. You wanted that hot tongue closer, harder, deeper inside you, wanted Sanji to eat you like he meant it, make that coil finally snap, fuck.

Your hips rocked against his face, the movements hindered by the grip he still held on your thighs, and when you couldn’t use your hips to attain your desire, you used your grip in his hair as leverage to push his face closer. Sanji let out a guttural groan as you did so, his tongue now focusing all of its attention on your clit, flicking and sucking and circling, shit, it felt so good, you were losing your mind —

“S-Sanji, fuck, don’t stop.” You begged, tears pricking behind your eyes as your hips stuttered. It was so close, you could feel it, you were teetering right on the edge. You just needed a bit more. “Ah, faster, please, I’m almost there.”

Sanji groaned and dropped his forearms from your thighs, winding his hands up to instead grip your hips harshly. Never faltering the movements of his tongue, Sanji rocked your hips for you, nearly crushing your cunt against his mouth with the fast, hard pace he’d forced upon your hips. You let your body fall lax as Sanji manhandled you easily, guiding your body to the utmost point of pleasure, tongue leaving your clit to shove between your folds and wiggle inside your tight channel.

Sanji’s moans now rivaled yours in volume, and had you been in your right mind, you probably would have been concerned about whether or not someone could hear the lewd activities unfolding within the galley — but Sanji was effectively tongue fucking all coherency out of your brain, eyes locked on yours and that little ball scraping against the bottom wall of your cunt and driving you absolutely feral.

“Fucking shit, Sanji, it feels so good.” You moaned, fingers scratching against his scalp in appreciation, your hips trembling under his hands and that coil winding so tightly you were sure you were going to start cramping from it if it didn’t snap soon. “Keep fucking doing that, I’m gonna fucking cum.”

Sanji’s right hand curled forward until he could slide his fingertips against your clit, the combined stimulation of his tongue plunging into your cunt and firm fingertips rubbing circles into your clit nearly instantly snapping that coil. Your other hand swung down to grip his hair as well, and your hips bucked with abandon against his face as your orgasm ripped through you.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, yes!” You chanted, upper body curling around Sanji’s head as your hips twitched and your clit throbbed under his fingers. Sanji never slowed his caresses, didn’t once stop your movements, not until the waves of your orgasm had faded and the pleasure quickly turned into something unpleasant.

Sanji’s tongue slipped out of your cunt wetly, his hand giving your hip a slight squeeze as his other retracted from your clit, and as you sat dazed and breathless, still riding the high of your orgasm, Sanji maneuvered your bodies until he was now standing between your shaking thighs, his hands coming up to rest on either side of your neck.

“Are you okay, love?” Sanji asked gently, and all you could do was nod with a goofy sort of smile on your face. That had felt absolutely amazing, and your body was still buzzing, still hot and so, so fuzzy from the aftershocks. You leaned your forehead into Sanji’s chest, inhaling the subtle scent of his cologne, your near liquified arms coming up to wrap around his middle.

For a few moments, the two of you stayed like that, wrapped around each other, until Sanji finally broke the silence.

“You looked so amazing when you came, doll.”

The words were hot, spoken lowly with something akin to reverence, but there was something else eddying beneath them, something that told you there was more to the statement than just what he’d said. Your suspicions were confirmed when Sanji slid his hands from your neck and wrapped his arms around your hips, pulling your lower half flush against his, and your breath halted in your lungs when you felt the searing heat of his clothed cock against your core. It was fucking massive — and Sanji’s next lowly growled words sent a shiver up your spine.

“I can’t wait to see you when you cum on my cock.”

#opla #opla sanji #opla x reader #one piece live action #opla sanji x reader

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oh-meretseger · 8 months ago

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part 7 - Date Me

attack on titan modern college au // Jean Kirstein x fem!reader

notes: fluff (your first date🥹) with a little more dialogue with the others <3, kind of 18+! [a prequel to the smut that comes in the next chapter hehe], explicit language, making out, groping, dry humping

word count: 5,3k

"Look, I know him. I can see he adores you. You shouldn't worry about it" Sasha glanced up at you for a second, then turned her attention right back at the work she was crocheting, comfortably propped up by a bunch of her fluffy pillows.

"I just— I thought the same when I talked to Marco, but he's been avoiding me like the fucking plague"

"Oh my god, quit being so dramatic" Ymir rolled her eyes with an insufferable agony on her face. She wasn't the most supportive when it came to boy drama, but you still considered her a good friend after this short time you've known her - so when she came over to your dorm on her way to meet up with Historia, you decided to cry out all your pent-up frustration to the girls. "I just saw you two talking after morning class"

"AND he literally agreed to the movie night with us tomorrow, just us three" Sasha added.

"Yeah but— Y'know, I mentioned the night of the party and he instantly changed the subject" you replied quietly as your eyes dropped to your lap. "He doesn't even look at me like it happened, he doesn't joke with me or touch me—"

"What, do you expect him to finger you in front of the whole class?" Sasha frowned, pointing at you with her crochet hook.

"EEWWW" Ymir yelled out, wrinkling her freckled nose in utter disgust, and you shook your head as you tried to bite back your chuckle. You kinda started to regret telling them.

"NO, but— do you understand what I'm saying?"

"No" Ymir bluntly replied as she kept pushing herself off the desk, spinning on Sasha's swivel chair with an ungodly speed.

"I do, but again, I don't think he feels any differently about you" Sasha said without looking up from her work. "Just talk to him, pookie"

"For real. Y'all are like two mentally handicapped middle schoolers" Ymir pulled a face at you, then looked up at the ceiling, opening her arms theatrically. "Just kill them, dear God, don't make them suffer anymore"

"Get lost" you grinned as you grabbed the closest pillow on your bed to toss it right against her head. "You're right though, I should've just initiated... Jean's just always so straightforward, him being so awkward about it catches me off guard"

It's almost been a week since Connie's party and as soon as you ran into Jean on Monday, something instantly felt off. 'Missed my dumb ass?' you asked and he looked away sheepishly 'I don't really miss any body parts', seeming flustered before swiftly changing the subject to civil law (ok, great move, Jean). You had no idea what could be going on, you've never seen Jean being so awkward. Maybe even embarrassed. But why is he embarrassed? Maybe he regrets it..?

Even though you were originally the one to kick against the vulnerable moments happening between you two, you still felt like your subconscious hopes were shattered into pieces.

"Pfft, awkward" Ymir snorted. "I still can't believe the king of arrogance himself is acting sheepish about this shit"

"He's not arrogant" Sasha smirked up at her and you smiled. Kind of the same conversation happened between you when you were the one despising Jean's cocky attitude, just a few months ago. "You just don't know him that well"

Ymir huffed condescendingly.

"Who knows anyway what them stupid men have sloshing around in their ugly skulls" she grimaced as she momentarily stopped spinning, hugging her pulled up knees. "Instead of a brain"

"Jean has a pretty skull though" you pouted, but you knew there was no use arguing. You could point your finger at any man, and Ymir would wrinkle her nose in disgust at every one of them.

"Bruh" Ymir glared at you. "That man looks like a ponderosa pine with limbs, you're a dumbass for crying about him"

"BAHHHAHAHA" laughter bursted out of Sasha uncontrollably, and you stared at her squeezing her eyes, mouth wide open as she screamed hysterically, as if Ymir just dropped the most hilarious joke on planet Earth.

"What on earth is a ponderosa" you gazed blankly, then scoffed at Sasha as she wiped her tears. "And what the hell are you laughing at? A few days ago she told you Niccolo looked like a dumpling with a blonde mop on top of it"

"I like dumplings" Sasha shrugged as her shoulders shook with laughter and a satisfied grin grew on Ymir's face.

"See?" Ymir raised her eyebrow at you, then started pushing herself again to get the swivel chair to reach a space shuttle's centripetal force. "I think you should quit thinking about his praying mantis lookin' ass, like, altogether"

A small chuckle bursted out of you but you tried your best to bite it back, wanting to keep the situation serious, even though Sasha was still wheezing in the background.

"What? He should actually be grateful a girl like you let him touch her princess parts" Ymir sneered at you scornfully. "I mean, I'm not trying to judge your taste in men, but girl—"

"Yeah, I can see that" you grimaced at her. "You're not judging, I'm just naturally attracted to pine trees and you support my fetish"

"Hey, all the way" Ymir started spinning herself the other way. "If that's what you're into"

"Thanks a lot"

"You know I understand you girls, I just don't condone you crying after all these athletes that are gross and stink like a skunk after practice, and act like dickheads after you touch their pickle"

"Fair" Sasha glanced up, and you continued your game trying to hit Ymir in the head with all the pillows and stuffies you could find in the room as she swivelled with the speed of a tumble dryer.

Until Sasha bursted out laughing once again.

"What's so funny?"

"If I told you a few months ago you were gonna be all lovey-dovey about Jean you would've decked me" Sasha chuckled and you felt your stomach flip at her words. Lovey-dovey, huh?

"I'd never deck you, Sasha"

"I would" Ymir chimed in.

"You'd deck anyone" you chuckled, holding your arms up to your head to protect yourself from Ymir's vengeful blow as she launched a pillow back at you with the force of her insane spinning.

"Indeed" she replied, then stopped the swivel chair, finger gunning at you as she got up. "And now if you'll forgive me, I have an angel to meet who absolutely never stinks like a skunk"

"My brother in Christ, only God can forgive you for the shit you've said in this room" Sasha said without looking up and you laughed as Ymir stumbled to the door, obviously feeling dizzy from turning about three million times in the last twenty minutes.

"Tell Hisu we're saying hi!"

"Ight, see ya fools!" the door slammed shut behind Ymir and you looked at Sasha's skilled hands moving for a few silent seconds. Jean filled your mind like a heavy, intoxicating fog at all times, making every single cell in your body tingle with excitement. You wanted more. So much more of him.

"Look!" Sasha jumped to her feet as she finished her work, the crochet hook hanging from the piece of clothing she just made herself. She held the skirt up to her hips as she stood in front of the mirror. "What do you think?"

"It's really cute" you grinned at her reflection. "Colorful and pretty, just like you"

Although your dilemma seemingly dissolved, you still wasn't a hundred percent sure that Sasha was right. Your mind told you to believe her, considering how she was one of the few people who truly knew Jean - but your curiosity still got the best of you. That day, while Sasha went lurking around in the kitchen to watch Niccolo cook, you turned to Connie above your half eaten lunch in the canteen.

"Connie..."

"That's me" he replied, mouth full of food as he glanced at you, earning a quick roll of your eyes.

"Did Jean tell you anything about being mad at me?"

"Nah, why?"

"He's avoiding me" you said as your eyes dropped to your fork, jumbling the food around in your plate.

"He's trying his best not to fuck you, probably" Connie shrugged and you almost choked on your own saliva.

"You mean like— Did he—tell you?" you asked as you felt your cheeks burn with embarrassment. You absolutely didn't calculate on the possibility of Connie knowing all about your naughty business when you opened this topic.

"Tell me what" he furrowed his eyebrows and your heart almost jumped out of your chest. Fuck. You basically just told on yourself.

"Nothing, forget it" you muttered, but looking at Connie's expression, you already knew it was too late. The bright red tint of your face probably told him everything he needed to know.

"NO" Connie slammed his fists on the table, cutlery clattering against your plates with the devastating sound of his realization. You squeezed your eyes. "Say sike right now"

"Stop"

"You FUCKED?!" he yelled as he stared at you, jaw hanging open in utter shock, and your hands instantly moved to your eyes as a few turning heads around you caught your eye.

"Connie!" you hissed angrily, but there was no amount of sternness that could jolt him out of his shocked state.

"I can't believe that little dipshit didn't tell me" his eyes stared at you widened. "Was it good?"

"What?! No—I mean yeah, but—Connie, no, you don't get it" you stuttered as you tried to calm and collect your thoughts. "I talked to Marco beforehand and—"

"About fucking Jean?"

"No, about us, and how he feels—or, like—how he assumes he feels, and how I feel—"

"Huh?" Connie blinked at you. "Who feels what?"

"HIM. I mean, us both. I don't know what, but— I thought we both felt it, but now I'm not sure anymore and I'm starting to think he just misunderstood him, and all he felt was something temporary and completely different from what I feel" you gabbled in one breath, but looking at Connie's motionless face, you quickly realized it only made sense in your head. "You know?"

"You are on so many drugs" Connie said blankly and you sighed, defeated.

"Nevermind, forget it"

"So... You banged, but it was bad?"

You and Connie gazed at each other for a good few moments before you opened your mouth to reply, still not sure you were talking to an actual cognitive being. "Where's the factory reset button on you?"

He was at least considerate enough to drop the stupid questions when Reiner appeared at your table, grinning and happy to see your now familiar faces, then joined you having lunch - while ditching his teammates at the other table who wore the same varsity jackets as him, seemingly confused as to why Reiner chose to sit with you two randos.

But you didn't mind, moreover, were glad you finally got to talk to him a little more after just a few exchanged sentences at Connie's party. From the outside, Reiner looked exactly like your typical buff, intimidating jock type, but as soon as he spoke to you and Connie with that soft smile, a joyful warmth filled your chest at the realization: he was just a sweetheart in a huge, scary body.

"'Aight, I'll see you guys around" you grabbed your tray as you prepared to leave, but Reiner's hand stopped you in your tracks as it reached for your arm.

"Wait, which way y'going?"

"To the library" you smiled at him and he immediately returned it, a grin plastered on his face as he threw his gym bag over his shoulder.

"You can walk me to my class, then"

"Yeah? Should I drop you off on my way there?" you laughed and Reiner's warm eyes glared into yours as he winked at you.

"I know I'm in safe hands with you"

As you said bye to Connie and you felt Reiner softly place his hand on your waist to guide you to the way out of the canteen, you raised your eyes to suddenly meet a pair of familiarly intense hazel ones. Jean sauntered your way and you muttered a quiet 'hi' as he shook hands with Reiner while passing. His scent hit your nose and you felt dizzy all of a sudden, but he seemed so nonchalant and absolutely not touched by seeing Reiner by your side that you quickly shook the feeling off. He doesn't care.

Oh, but he did, very much so.

He had to force himself to relieve the clench of his jaw to save his teeth from breaking. Why did Reiner touch your waist like that? Who the fuck does he think he is? You barely even know him. And where the fuck are you going with him, just you two? Jean felt his muscles tense up, making great effort not to look back as he walked towards Connie, and away from you.

"What the fuck was that?" a growl bursted out of Jean as soon as he reached Connie's table.

"Dude, how can you fuck it up this bad? You have it so easy" Connie immediately complained in response and Jean sat down with a confused frown.

"What are you talking about?"

"You're all she talked about, she actually went fucking nuts about ten minutes ago—"

"What? Why?" Jean cut him off, the tension of his muscles increasing as he got more impatient.

"She asked me if you were mad at her, and I said no, and she told me you two fucked—" Connie jabbered, but Jean's frustration took over again.

"Okay, she most definitely did not tell you that" he shook his head.

"Whatever, you kept it a secret from me anyway, so I'm quite disappointed in you at the moment, don't cut me off" Connie replied like the assertive gentleman he was. "Anyways, now she thinks you just wanted to get her laid and dip cause you avoid her, or whatever"

"What?! That's stupid" Jean's eyebrows furrowed and he felt his heartbeat intensify. Is that really what you think? The exact opposite was what he was trying to do. After that drunken night, Jean was scared you'll get the wrong impression and think he just wants to fool around. However, after talking to Marco, he was certain in one thing: he didn't want the two of you to stay casual, and he wanted you on the same page as him. "Why the hell would I dip?"

"THAT'S what I'm saying, you have it so easy, man. She's infatuated with you. Don't fuck it up"

"Where did that word come from?" one of Jean's eyebrows raised in suspicion and Connie shrugged.

"I was reading Sasha's magazine in class earlier" he replied and Jean shook his head with a smile. The nervous beating of his heart and the uneasy feeling in his stomach remained - an awful guilt started to twist his mind as he imagined you having these stupid thoughts. The last thing he wanted was for you to feel like he didn't cherish all the intimate moments that'd happened between you like the most precious little treasure in his heart. He wanted more, so much more, but he was so scared of you believing sex was all he wanted from you.

"I don't want to fuck it up, but—" Jean nervously rubbed his temple. "I was thinking earlier—"

"Wow, impressive" Connie said bluntly and Jean's face dropped.

"Shut the fuck up" he growled, then slapped Connie's hand away as he poked his hand.

"You're holding the knife in the wrong hand, by the way"

Jean stared at him for a few moments, contemplating if he should just stab that knife into his own neck.

"I'm left-handed, you fucking dumbass"

You smiled at Reiner one last time before you parted ways in front of his class, then continued your way to the library. Reiner was a sweet guy - he gave you the impression of a seemingly confident, but secretly timid man who mastered the art of flirting, yet still became flustered when the same flirty comments were thrown right back at him. Although they were light-hearted, you didn't take them seriously. He probably flirted like that with most of the girls around campus.

You turned left at the familiar bookshelf, making your way to your favorite quiet corner of the library. Though it looked like the single table there was already occupied. You gazed at the back of the black jacket that had hand-painted lettering on it, dark strands of hair falling to his shoulder and moving with a familiar shine as he turned his head to the sound of your steps.

"Eren" you smiled at him, trying not to spontaneously burst into flames at the intensity of his bright greenish eyes piercing through yours. Eren closed the book in his hand, kindly removing his crossed legs from the other chair and moving over so you could get seated. "What are you reading?"

You grabbed the book handed to you, examining the dark cover of The Black Cat by Edgar Allan Poe. Your eyes flicking to the other two books lying on the table, you instantly realized Eren didn't pick them for himself - you knew Mikasa was mad about gothic literature. A smile curved your lips at the thought of Eren browsing around for hours, looking for books that'd make Mikasa happy.

How sweet.

"Where did you leave your mullet-man?" Eren asked with a smirk and you lifted your gaze at the metallic sound hitting your ear. A balisong was spinning and turning smoothly between Eren's fingers, the insane speed of his effortless movements catching you off guard. It could've been interpreted as kind of a threat, but you knew Eren.

You didn't expect any less from a man who regularly visited bars around campus to find dudes that harassed vulnerable, drunk girls, and beat those dudes up just for fun.

"I don't have any cash, if you're trying to threaten me" you said and Eren laughed as your eyes were glued to the effortless flicking of his wrist, the butterfly knife swinging around in the air like a toy. "But I—I don't know, his business is not mine"

"Ah, right" Eren all-knowingly smiled as he closed the balisong. "That's why he's followed you here"

"What?" you turned your head to follow Eren's eyes with a confused frown and your heart skipped a beat as you saw Jean's tall frame walking towards you.

"Your business is his, apparently" Eren winked at you and put his knife in his pocket, then grabbed the books as he stood up. "I'll leave you two lovebirds alone"

You felt your cheeks heat up at his comment. He knew exactly how to make you flustered in just seconds.

"I know those are for Mikasa, ya big ass lovebird" you said to quickly snap back at him, earning a roll of his eyes and an irritated huff. Eren didn't like you knowing about the existance of his emotions, apparently. It was never fully obvious to you whether him and Mikasa were together or not, but they basically lived their lives attached at the hip, so it wasn't hard to figure.

"Look who decided to finally get into a six foot radius of a book" Eren turned to Jean to greet him with a huge grin.

"What are you doing here?" Jean frowned at Eren. "You're not illiterate anymore?! You could've told us, we would've thrown a party or something"

You chuckled, although you tried to keep it quiet. These stand-offs between Jean and Eren could get brutal and usually, the more you gave voice to your amusement, the more hostile they got.

"There was a party, I just timed it to coincide with the hockey team's twentyseventh lost game of this season, that must be why you missed it" Eren deadpanned. "Sorry"

You bursted out laughing this time, the honest hurt on Jean's face at Eren's stupid remark was just too much to bear.

"Your girl laughs at my jokes harder than yours" Eren grinned, and you immediately blushed at the title. You're not even 'his girl'. Though you weren't so quick to correct him. "Get your shit together, my man"

"Alright Jäger, we get it, your balls finally dropped" Jean sat down next to you as his hand motioned for Eren to go away. "Now walk. And never stop"

"Oof, did someone feed you after midnight, Kirstein?" Eren smiled as he looked to you, then winked at you one more time before turning to leave. "Bye, little birds"

"Bye, Romeo!" you sneered at him and looked at his head shaking as he walked away.

Your eyes darted to Jean as a moment of silence set between you and he felt himself get flustered right away. He felt unbelievably weak for a second as he realized how he always melted under the twinkle in your beautiful big eyes. He liked to think he's got his emotions under control at all times, but the way he became bewitched by how pretty you are every single time told him otherwise. Your soft lips curved into a slight smile, pretty little freckles on your nose moving with the movements of your face, your eyelashes slowly blinking, alluring Jean to breathlessly lose himself in the endless depth of your eyes. He just couldn't not stare.

"You love each other, just admit it" you smirked at him and Jean snapped out of his trance, gritting his teeth.

"He's an idiot"

"Sure" you smiled to yourself, knowing exactly what was actually hidden behind Eren and Jean's whole hating-each-other's-guts facade.

"Hey, I wanted to ask you something—" Jean's eyes dropped to his hands on the table, his fingers nervously fidgeting as he tried to gather all his strength to force the words out. "I just—I don't want you to feel like fooling around is all I'm interested in"

"Is it not?" you cheekily raised an eyebrow as you bit back your smile, secretly loving the way this big and gruffy man got so shy and timid all of a sudden.

"No, it's not. And you know that" Jean replied bluntly as his eyes shot to yours and your heart jumped in your chest at the intense eye contact. He was right, you did. Your eyes flicked to his again as you heard your name roll off his tongue, sounding so beautifully sweet. "I’m taking you out on a date"

"Do I have a say in it?" you chuckled, and although it sounded more like a demand, your heart still started fluttering with pure happiness.

"No" he smirked, his heart unknowingly matching the fluttering of yours as he looked at you smile. "Date me, it's a command"

"Yes, sir!" you nodded. You didn't want to further force a conversation about his exact thoughts and feelings, you just felt happy to see where things were going. "So no fooling around, you said?"

"Uh-uh" he shook his head, then smirked as his eyes sparkled with a mischievous glint. "For now, at least. What do you say?"

"Sounds good" you returned his playful smile. You'll be curious to see how long he'd obey his rule. "Tomorrow night?"

The key turned in the lock, the door slowly opened and your hand quickly started to fumble around to find the light switch. You walked into the empty dorm as it lit up, then swiftly reached out to your night lamp to switch to that light instead. It was more friendly.

The room was empty, but that didn't take you by surprise. After you and Jean cancelled on you three's movie night, Sasha was more than happy to go home for the weekend instead, leaving the dorm empty for you on accident. She was internally in hysterics as soon as she heard about your little date, but you tried your best to convince her it was just a "casual hangout, nothing special", so she left it to you.

Jean stepped in the dorm after you, closing the door behind him. A comfortable silence filled the room as he shook his jacket off of his shoulders, laying it on Sasha's swivel chair. Warmth spread in your chest as you felt his scent fill your nose, his presence making the butterflies in your stomach flap around in ecstasy.

"Can I use your charger?" he grabbed the cable lying on your bed.

"Sure" you replied as you kicked off your shoes, then watched as he plugged his phone in. The dark band shirt fit loose on his broad shoulders, soft strands of ashy brown hair fell to his neck, and the way the warm light grazed the side profile of his pretty face made you melt.

Jean flopped down on your bed, making you immediately jump to push him off.

"NO!" you pressed your palms on his back as hard as you could, but he just chuckled, not flinching one bit. "Get your outside clothes off my bed!"

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot you're clinically insane"

"Take these off" you tugged on Jean's cargos with a frown. He just sat on the bus with those pants, you couldn't have all the nasty bus-germs all over your clean bed.

"Hey, cool it. I told you, no naughty stuff" he smirked up at you and you chuckled. Right, no naughty stuff. We’ll see.

“Take it off”

Jean felt the blood in his body start to wander to a different place from his brain as memories flooded his mind at hearing your demanding tone. He couldn’t be more confident in his decision to slow things down with you - but he felt his presence of mind fading as your eyes blinked at him with that playful glint.

“Your wish is my command, smartass” Jean kicked off his shoes and you bit down on your lower lip as you watched his hands move to fumble with the buckle of his belt. You felt a familiar heat spread in your core as you looked at him and you hesitated for a moment before reaching for the button of your own jeans.

Neither of you really overdressed for your cute little date. You agreed that a simple milkshake in the café near the campus and a walk in the park would perfectly fit for a first date, eliminating any excessive pressure and frustration of a fancier one. Jean told you to dress ‘sleazy’ and ‘preferably like a homeless person’, so you did just that, you even kinda matched with him in your baggy jeans and big hoodie. Jean secretly hoped it’d be easier to keep his composure this way, but homeless-you mesmerized him just as much as if you dressed up, maybe even a little more. He found your smaller frame in those huge clothes adorable - especially now that he knew what you were hiding under them.

The plan worked, with some of the pressure lifted off, it felt amazing to be in his presence. An unknown kind of happiness filled both of your brains as hours flew by, your conversation only stopping when your eyes sank too deep into each other, erasing all existing thoughts in your hazy minds.

“You won’t make me take a shower this time?” Jean smirked as he pulled his legs out of his cargo pants, then quickly squeezed his eyes shut when his eyes flicked up to you just as your baggy jeans fell to your ankles. He already felt himself getting hard as the soft skin of your beautiful legs caught his eye. Oh, no.

“No, not this time” you smiled, then pulled your hoodie to take it off. Jean sat there spellbound as he watched you lay your clothes on a chair, then put your glasses on the desk, light grazing the round ouline of your ass in your cute little panties, a tight cropped top letting the skin on the curve of your beautiful waist show. He felt the blood rush to his groin and you turned around, your hard nipples of your perfect tits showing through the small top, letting him know you had no bra on all along.

You bit your lower lip as you looked at Jean, his pretty lips parted as he stared at you, a growing bulge in his boxers between his deliciously spread thighs telling you he liked the view just as much as you did.

“This is not a good idea”

“Why? We’re not gonna do anything” you replied softly while you stepped closer to Jean, standing between his legs as he looked up to you with already flushed cheeks. His lashes fluttered as your fingers found their way through his hair. “You said it yourself, right?”

“Right” Jean mumbled as his eyes closed at the heavenly feeling of your touch. His face looked so beautiful like this, him melting between your hands, you just couldn’t help leaning down to press a soft kiss on his lips.

The kiss was sweet and slow, full of tender emotions. Although it still sent a burning heat through both of your cores, this time it also felt so delicately warm and affectionate.

Your lips started moving in perfect sync as you laid down on your bed, hands slowly roaming each other’s bodies, gentle strokes and deep, passionate kisses heating them up. Your sense of time vanished as you made out and the wet noises of your lips filled the room, along with your desperate whimpers and Jean’s quiet groans as your hips slowly rolled into his, one of your legs wrapped around him as you laid on your sides. The wet spot on your panties rubbed on his aching bulge so well, Jean couldn’t help his fingers digging into your hips, driving them to grind into him harder.

“You feel so good, baby” he moaned into your mouth and another whimper fell from yours in response. His warm tongue in your mouth, his strong hands groping you and the friction of grinding on his bulge was enough to already push you to the edge.

“Y—you too, Jean” you moaned back, but neither of you moved your hands to each other’s desperately aching, sensitive parts. Neither of you took it further.

Jean meant what he said - even if you both knew you weren’t going to endure very long, he wanted you to know he’s not there for the fun only. He felt like listening to your laughter and looking into your sparkling eyes above your milkshakes was just as fun as your hands brushing, then gently intertwining while you walked in the park, or as pulling on your hair to leave sloppy kisses all over your neck while you moaned in pleasure.

“D’you wanna stay the night?” you asked quietly as your hands cupped each side of his jaw, admiring the golden glint of his beautiful hazel eyes. “Please”

“Of course” he softly smiled at you.

Jean felt like he was on cloud nine. For him, fun was the way your muffled laughing sounded and how radiant your pretty face looked in the mirror while you both brushed your teeth in the bathroom, or the tingling he felt as your bare skin brushed against each other, and also watching you do your nightly routine before lying down in your bed and having the silliest, most stupid coversations as you laughed together. Fun was also the intense eye contact before tangling into each other again, sloppily making out and grinding heavily until both of your underwear was soaked with the mixture of your wetness and the precum leaking from his sensitive tip.

But the most fun part was hugging you tightly, feeling the warmth of your body and inhaling the sweet scent of your hair as you pressed your ass into Jean’s hard-on before quickly drifting off in the safe embrace of his strong arms. Even like this, he felt so full, so at peace.

Jean couldn’t have been happier.

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makeste · 1 year ago

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BnHA Chapter 409: Bro I’m Straight Up Having a Good Time

Previously on BnHA: AFO murdered his brother like the mischievous knave he is. Bruce was all, “hey Kudou don’t look now but I think Yoichi might have given you his secret quirk that we didn’t know he had.” Kudou was all, “damn that’s wild, it almost feels like this is a pivotal moment that will change all our destinies forever, you’d think Horikoshi would have spent just a little more time elaborating on this but I GUESS NOT.” Back in the present day, AFO was all, “I’m just going to use all my quirks at once because fuck this kid,” and Katsuki was all, “lol oh shit.”

Today on BnHA: Kacchan is all, “okay, I know I should be hopelessly outclassed, but hear me out: what if I just win anyway. What if I just go ahead and blow his shit up, because this is the final battle, and this is what all of my character development has been building up to since day one. What if I just beat him, because I’m the guy who wins. Simple as that. What if I just kick his ass with my one quirk, and prove all the haters wrong.” Horikoshi is all, “okay, sure.” AFO is all, “wait, wha -- ”

oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my g

huh. well I wasn’t expecting to start tearing up less than two panels into this chapter but HERE WE ARE

I love that he’s screaming and crying with his balled up little fist right from the get go lol. he was born a pissed off baby

he’s so squishy

and so tiny!!!!?!?! !?!??!?!

and he was RAISED WITH LOVE. fucking thank you, lol. gonna print that out and frame it on my wall. turn it into a flashing neon sign to give me comfort any time I stumble across stray Mitsuki discourse lol

anyway. oh my goodness. if this is a sign of things to come, there’s a very strong possibility this chapter may destroy me. how exciting!!

yep. yep yep yep. this is for sure going to be the chapter that finally does me in. it’s been a great ride folks

you better not be thinking any thoughts about dying, young man. this had better be meant in the sense of “because I’ll be by your side supporting you instead”, as opposed to “because I will be a little pile of dust in about three seconds’ time oh shit”

(ETA: after finishing the rest of the chapter, I’m pretty sure it’s the former! the first flashback is a reference to his chapter 120 speech -- “even higher than you, Chosen One.” the second is a throwback to chapter 247, when he told Endeavor he only had his one quirk, but it was strong enough to do anything he wanted to do. and the third flashback is one he also had at Jakku when he sacrificed himself to push Izuku out of the way.

so to me, this reads like (1) a reminder of his determination to surpass Izuku and become the strongest hero; (2) foreshadowing for him defeating AFO with Explosion, the Little Quirk That Could; and (3) a reminder of his “origin.” that last one being important because nowadays it’s just as strong of a motivator as his original goal. back at the beginning of the series, all he cared about was being the strongest. now, though, he’s not just fighting for himself; he’s also fighting to atone, and he’s learned to put himself aside if necessary.

as for the dialogue, this reads like a continuation of his mental conversation with Izuku that he began in chapter 362 (“gotta win... right, Izuku?” “so, Izuku... can I still catch up to you?”), and then continued in chapter 406 (“for some reason, I feel like I could overtake you now”). so in that context, “I’ll no longer get in your way” basically means that he’s done chasing Izuku, and that he’s caught up now and can hold his own. his determination to get stronger hasn’t wavered. his confidence in his own quirk and his own skills hasn’t wavered. and his resolve to atone for everything he did to Izuku is as strong as ever. put those all together, and we have the recipe for quite a spectacular redemption fight. his follow-up to chapter 362.

because earlier when he fought Tomura/AFO, he was basically just trying to buy time. no one ever planned or expected him to have to face the Big Bad one-on-one; that was supposed to be Izuku’s job. he was only meant to be there as support. and in the end he wasn’t strong enough, and he nearly died. and rather than being able to support Izuku, he ended up being used against him.

but this time is different. he’s no longer the decoy, the distraction. he’s no longer the pebble. he won’t get in Izuku’s way, because this time he’s going to be strong enough to win the fight. he’s going to hold his own, and get the job done.

so yeah. “I won’t get in your way” = “you can depend on me”, basically. because he’s become that guy at last. the guy who shows up in the clutch and wins the day. the hero he always wanted to be. good stuff.)

OH MY GOD

once again, just really solid hero advice from All Might here. there’s a reason he’s the GOAT

lol but in all seriousness it does tug at my heart to see him shouting so desperately at this kid. especially knowing that he’s presumably feeling the same pride and awe that I am, but with a lot more heart-stopping terror mixed in because unlike me, All Might doesn’t know that Kacchan is actually going to live forever. he narrated chapter 285, All Might, have a little faith

AFO is the extra-est mfer to ever live. but also it really tickles me to think that Kacchan pissed him off THIS much. it’s kind of an honor in a way

of course his plan is to simply just blow AFO up. of fucking COURSE it is. maybe there will be brain cells later on in this chapter, but for now who even needs them lol

OH MY GOD?!?

DID THIS MOTHERFUCKER JUST BLOW THE FUCK UP FROM THE INSIDE?? am I seeing this right?? DID KACCHAN JUST SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST ALL FOR ONE WITH HIS MIND

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

(ETA: shoutout to AFO for being so analytical when I personally would have just been screaming, “OH MY GOD MY FUCKING EYEBALLS AHHHHHHHHHH.”)

THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING THOUGH!! HIS POWER WASN’T DONE AWAKENING YET, APPARENTLY??

oh no wait it’s even better. this isn’t Awakening at all, this is just Katsuki playing 5D chess

so he actually did have brain cells the whole time then! Katsuki I sincerely apologize. you somehow had the presence of mind to make a goddamn minefield even in the midst of all of this hullaballoo

AND HE’S HUMBLE TOO LMAO

it’s true!! I’m people!! please ignore the multitude of times I’ve previously called him a dumbass, including earlier in this very chapter lol

hahahahaha yesssssssss

this chapter is incredibly validating for a number of reasons. I’m going to attempt to remain calm about it. but I’m enjoying this a lot ngl

oh AFO

:D :D :D

(ETA: you know what, I actually do have more to say about this. because I’ve lost track of the number of times I’ve debated with people about this very thing, lol. for a while there post-Jakku it was just constant pessimism about Kacchan’s future in the manga. all this stuff about how Katsuki doesn’t have a main villain. Katsuki isn’t important enough. Katsuki is being phased out. Katsuki isn’t strong enough. Katsuki’s done developing. Katsuki’s just a joke character now. Katsuki’s just the damsel in distress. Katsuki’s always going to be second fiddle to Izuku. etc. etc. etc.

and then this chapter -- this whole entire fight, really -- comes along, and it’s just nonstop rebuttals, lol. and it’s not just that he’s proving all the negativity wrong. it’s that he doesn’t even care about any of that. AFO is out here trying to goad him with that same “YOU’RE JUST A SIDE CHARACTER” bait, and in response Katsuki just hits him with a Howitzer and tells him to shut the fuck up. AFO thinks he can get to him by being petty, because AFO still sees him as the bratty kid from the Sports Festival. but the present day Katsuki has long since moved past all of that, and no longer gives a fuck whether or not he shares the spotlight. unlike AFO, who never lost his childish egotism, Katsuki has learned to see outside himself, and the resulting growth has made him a bigger badass than AFO could ever hope to be.)

(۶•̀ᴗ•́)۶

ouch

HAHAHAHAHA

bro I’m straight up having a good time. this recap is gonna suck this week because there’s absolutely no commentary I can think of to add other than “I’M REALLY ENJOYING THIS, THIS IS GREAT”

I want to take this entire chapter and get it tattooed on my face

sorry AFO. this must really suck for you

lmao. is that all Kacchan. tell him how you really feel

OH MY GOD NO WAY LOL

so, fun fact, I literally just read chapter 385 last night lmao. most fortunate timing I’ve ever had, holy shit

okay so lemme just add some more thoughts on this one really quick

Hawks deserves all the nice things in the world and I’m so sad I can’t give them to him, but at least he gets this. sweet sassy revenge

I am once again calling everyone’s attention to the fact that AFO continues to be his own undoing. congrats on screwing yourself over bucko

Kacchan’s sleeve ripping up Deku-style is once again making my Plus OFA Theory senses all tingly. it probably is just a coincidence and has nothing to do with OFA, but I can’t unassociate it now, so I’m just gonna sit here and read as much into it as possible

if I had a nickel for every time AFO’s eyes blew up in this chapter, I would have two nickels, and that is way too many fucking nickels jesus christ

ever since he came back from the dead, Kacchan’s been doing this thing where he is just really pretty at all times, even when he is being a gremlin. and honestly it’s taken some getting used to, although I’m not complaining

but like in this panel especially, it just really stands out to me how even his “GRYAHHH I’M GONNA KILL YA!!!” face somehow has this really cool, intense, piercing glare now and he no longer looks like a baby troll when he does this kind of thing lol

OH FUCK YEAH

୧༼✿ ͡◕ д ◕͡ ༽୨

“THERE’S NO WAY I COULD’VE WON THIS ALONE.” OMG. THAT KACCHAN CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT JUST HITS DIFFERENT EVERY DAMN TIME, I SWEAR

he and Hawks basically pulled a “you hold him and I’ll punch” lol. thanks for the assist Hawks

Mitsuki and Masaru being all, “my little baby boy!!” and “HOLY SHIT”, respectively, sent me all the way to the moon lmao

HELLO THERE YOICHI? fancy running into you here. just chilling out over in this montage of people close to Bakugou who are watching him kick ass. did you take a wrong turn, mayhap. you’re not inside of AFO, we know that much. and Deku, much as I’m sure he’d love to have a front row seat to all this, seems to have his hands full dealing with Tomura right now, sadly

so all of that does seem to raise an interesting question, no? where did you come from just now, and why? and when Kacchan says he’s not alone, is there perhaps more truth to that statement than even he knows? or am I once again just reading way too much into this lmao

anyway so yeah! that sure was fun. and with the end of the year approaching and back-to-back two-week chapter breaks coming up, I have a chance to do the funniest thing of all time, and still not manage to catch up, lol. nah but I’m gonna try my best though. pretty sure I should be able to manage

#bnha 409 #bakugou katsuki #all for one #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #sorry this is late I've been trying to post it for almost an hour #the 'post now' button was infuriatingly greyed out for some reason #ended up having to copy everything over to a brand new post and redo all the pics and formatting #thanks tumblr

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burnin0akleaves · 7 months ago

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Here's the draw six fanarts meme I decided to participate in 4 years late

In true burnin0akleaves spirit I didn't ask anyone for requests and just went ahead with all of the characters that have been the most impactful/important to me, so there is a high chance you've seen me draw these guys before.

By the way, unlike the rest of the blorbos here Siyra is an original character and belongs to @nineteen-rats!

Close-ups and rambles under the cut because it's my blog

Ohh the Dark Urge. My latest obsession. I love his design so much, I'm a slut for white/red color schemes, but I feel like it's a double edged sword that takes you out of the horrors he's commiting at the same time?

Durge is supposed to be murder incarnate, someone that does every fucked up thing related to death imaginable; but when you see a giant lizard eating babies or humping corpses, it dulls the effect a bit since you automatically view it as an animalistic act. Dragonborns are obviously a fully sentient humanoid race in-universe; but when the violence you're seeing is already toeing the line between horrifying and hilarious, seeing a scalie doing it just pushes it over the line. I still think it works really well most of the time and I'm very glad that this is the default durge we get! It's just funny to me that when you choose to play as the giant lizard, the dark and disgusting horror story turns into the hilariously edgy bloodfest.

Reminding everyone again that Siyra belongs to @nineteen-rats! I love this man so so so much. I am the Siyra fandom. I am the number one Siyra fanartist. He did nothing wrong and I will defend his every decision. I also hope terrible horrors befall him and that his actions keep him awake for the rest of his life. Pookie bear xoxo

COMING IN WITH THE STEEL CHAIR IT'S WILL TREATY

He is on my mind, always. I don't talk about him as much but he's probably still the fictional character who had the most impact on me as a person.

PATROCLUS! PATROCLUS!!! SIR I'M YOUR NUMBER ONE FAN!!

I got into patrochilles and the Illiad in general thanks to "The Song of Achilles". It was one of the first queer books I got to have in real life and the prose captivated me instantly, I still have it on my shelf. After reading the Illiad itself however, I hate that book so much. I'm sorry it's genuinely beautiful and I get why people like it but I can never forgive that horrible Patroclus characterization after seeing what he was originally like. Achilles too for that matter.

Hades swooped me up into its arms like I was a sick baby bird and nursed me back to health with its portrayal of the two though and for that I am forever grateful. I can't wait for Hades 2, death to Chronos.

God Half-Life is such an important series for me. My dad would let me play through a few levels since I was a child, he grew up with the games, but I REALLY played through the entire series one summer shortly before dad moved out. He was there watching me play most of it and getting to enjoy someone actually translate the game's dialogue for him for the first time.

Gordon may not speak once but I like the hints of his personality we get throughout the games, most importantly from the way Alyx talks to/about him. I have my own characterization of him obviously but I do really think you can get a good understanding of the kind of man he is meant to be in-universe just by paying attention to his surroundings. Also another reason the games were so immersive for me is that I'm just as in love with Alyx as Gordon is. I must have let her get hit only once or twice the entire time just out of how protective I was over her. I'd topple the entire Combine empire just for her hand in marriage. I rewatched the ending of Half Life Alyx recently and cried.

I read the entirety of LOTR in one week in 11th grade, carrying that damn brick of a book everyday to school and back. I'm so glad I did honestly. Frodo and Sam are my important little guys and I find myself going back to them when I need something to calm me down in a way no other series except LOTR can. I've read most of Tolkien's work at this point, but nothing captivated me like those two little hobbits. Everytime I read a bad take about their relationship I sketch them making out.

People liked seeing my drawing process before so here's the original sketch and the little notes I wrote to myself trying to set the mood. I followed like half of them.

#the dark urge #durge #will treaty #patroclus #gordon freeman #frodo baggins #default dragonborn durge #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #rangers apprentice #the royal ranger #hades game #half life #half life 2 #lotr #lord of the rings #🍃 fanart #that was a lot

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dr-spectre · 2 months ago

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Guess what game I just finished!!!

I dont have a lot to say on this because I think over the past 20 years people have already said enough.

But... MY GOD! The level of variety, creativity, and fresh ideas each chapter brings holy SHITTTT!!! One moment you're going underground with a cute goomba girl, then you're fighting a dragon, then you're playing a World 1-1 recreation with BOWSER! Then you're playing as Peach who has this deeply emotional and sad relationship with an AI (Tec is the goat, I love that ai. Top 10 ai in fiction idc), then you're doing a tournament arc AND THEN YOU'RE DOING A TRAIN MYSTERY OH MY GOODNESS!!!!

The combat is really fun and charming, THE DIALOGUE IS SO WELL WRITTEN AND I LAUGHED MULTIPLEEEEE TIMES!!! I love the characters, I love the world, I love the art style, i love most of the boss fights, the music is banging (I played with the original ost), God there's so much to love.

I will say, the final chapter of this game did kinda drag on, and there's so many points where I was thinking "okay NOW I get to fight the final boss!" And it takes another hour to get to them.... there's so many obvious signs of padding (copy and pasted hallways, a trash "pick the right door" puzzle, etc.)

I also didn't like how when you swapped partners that counts as a turn, i feel like you should be able to swap without wasting a turn because it would help with the flow of combat and make using Goombella's tattle less of a fucking pain...

Also....

VIVIAN IS SO FUCKING CUTE!!! I LOVE HER SO MUCH!!! SHE'S MY FAVOURITE PARTNER BY FARRRRR!!!!! Goombella is really cute too and she has amazing dialogue. I love the storyline of Admiral Bobbery too and that stuff made me cry... but...EEEEE I LOVE VIVIAN!!!!

GOD I JUST WANNA HUG HER!!! I WANNA PINCH HER CHUBBY CHEEKS!!! I WANNA RUB HER BELLY!!!! Nintendo I need a plushie of her yesterday. Come on. Please... I need one...

I shall leave my partner rankings as well, i wonder if I got any hot takes or not...

6. Flurrie.

No. Just... no I don't like her. Her design creeps me out, I don't give a shit about her moves. I never used her. Get her away from me.

5. Goombella.

Although very cute I found her more of a hindrance and i kept going, "ugh I gotta swap to her to get the tattle..." At least her design and personality are cute. Plus, she's more useful than that creepy ass Flurrie....

4. Koops.

I like him! He helped me out a LOTTT in the final battle, his later moves that you can unlock make him pretty damn good. Although I am jealous that this wimp has a girlfriend....

3. Admiral Bobbey.

Honestly I think the reason why he might be this high is because of his story. I really felt bad for him... his design is also killer, I LOVEEEE Bob-ombs so much!

2. Mini-Yoshi.

The fact that you can name him is really funny to me idk why. He's got some very helpful moves and his ability to help you move faster in the overworld is really nice. I like how he calls you Gonzalez too. What a fun character man.

1. Vivian.

I already said why I like her earlier but I'll go on further.

I LOVE HER STORYLINE TOO!!! I LOVE HER DESIGN!!! I LOVE HOW SHE'S TRANS AND THE REMAKE DIDN'T GET RID OF IT LIKE HOW THE ORIGINAL NORTH AMERICAN AND EUROPEAN RELEASES OF THE GAMECUBE VERSION GOT RID OF IT!!!

God.... I love her. I wanna kiss her on the cheek. She's so cute. Her moveset too is fire!.... wait..

Also btw I didn't know that this RATTTT was an optional party member... oops...

#paper mario #paper mario the thousand year door #nintendo #nintendo switch #game discussion #discussion #vivian paper mario #i love her #my thoughts #goombella #koops #koops ttyd #admiral bobbery #yoshi

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quartings · 1 year ago

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So, I just watched a censored cut of The Suicide Squad (2021) on a plane...

Let me tell you, it was one of the weirdest movie-watching experiences of my life. All the intense gore and violence was kept, but all the swearing was re-dubbed over by the original cast and the mild nudity was cut, which really makes me wonder who the heck this version of the film was even for?? What kind of person can watch people get blown up into bloody chunks but can’t handle the word “bastard”??

Here are some of the highlights from the censored cut that I thought were the most amusing. Again, reminder that the original actors all ADR’d over the swears with new dialogue.

· Harley’s “What the FUCK??” at TDK was changed to “What is THAT??”

· Bloodsport and Tyla’s “FUCK YOU!!”s were changed to “FORGET YOU!!” like Ceelo Green.

· More F-Bombs from Bloodsport were cut, leading to “I’m no (fighting) leader!!” and “You’re threatening my (teenage) daughter!!”

· Calendar Man’s insult to Polkadot Man was changed from “You fucking pussy!!” to “You flaming sissy!!”

· Peacemaker: “Starfish is a slang term for (an anus).” How is that any better than saying “butthole”??

· The entire exchange about dicks on the beach was changed to be about bricks instead, as was any future usage of the word “dick”. “If this whole beach was covered in (bricks), and someone said I had to eat every single (brick) on the beach for liberty, I would say no problem-o.” “Why would someone put (bricks) all over the beach??”

· Ratcatcher 2’s “You bastard!” was changed to “You bad fish!!”

· The entire “Well that’s just racist” exchange was cut.

· Bloodsport: “Why the (blood) would I want a leaf?!”

· Peacemaker’s jerking off taunt was cut. Characters still flip each other off in this cut though.

· Flag and Harley get to say “freaking”, so I don’t understand why it wasn’t used as a blanket censor for the f word instead.

· Harley’s “RIP to that absolutely beautiful monster between your legs” was kept in.

· King Shark’s “FUCK!!” was changed to “Pfflegh!”

· Bloodsport saying “Pissmaker” was kept

· Ratcatcher 2: “Do you want a dozen angry rodents crawling up your (pants)??”

· The 69 joke was kept

· Peacemaker: “MOTHER(TRUCKER)!!”

· Bloodsport’s “Jesus Christ…” was changed to “Holy Moses…”

· Flag’s “Who ate all the empanadas?” has the f word cut and sounds weirdly friendlier in the take they used.

· Harley: “I love the rain~ It’s like angels are (spitting) all over us~!”

· I swear Thinker’s “Sonofabit-!” when he’s getting slammed in the retinal scanner was changed to “Sonofawit-!”

· Thinker: “AMERICAN (GOOD OL’) ASTRONAUTS FOUND STARRO! YANKEE (****) DOODLE DANDIES!!”

· Flag’s “It’s time these sonsofbitches need to be held accountable-!” was changed to “It’s time these (stinkers) need to be held accountable-!”

· Polkadot Man’s “FUCK!!” in response to the others forgetting Milton was changed to “FUDGE!!”

· One of the Corto Maltese generals shouting “Puta!!” was changed to “Nunca!!”

· Economos: “WE’VE GOT A (FREAKING) KAIJU UP (ON) THIS (SCREEN)!!”

· Waller’s whole rant at the squad was censored, so it was hilarious to hear Viola Davis scream the absolutely neutered “FILTH!! TURN AROUND, GOSHDAMMIT! YOU STUPID IDIOTS! LOSERS!! DAMN IT, TASK FORCE X! THIS IS YOUR LAST AND FINAL WARNING!!”

· Flo: “GET ON THE SATELLITE, DALE YOU (FLAMING MEATHEAD)!!”

· And lastly, my personal favorite censorship, only because it actually fits thematically, comes from Polkadot Man’s last words: “I’M A MOTHER(-FIGHTING) SUPERHERO-!!”

#the suicide squad #q speaks #dceu #bloodsport #polka dot man #abner krill #harley quinn #peacemaker #christopher smith #ratcatcher 2 #cleo cazo #dc

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technicolorfamiliar · 2 months ago

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Well, it took me a year, but I watched a billion 50+ Conrad Veidt films. Some good, some great, some so bad that I hope I never have to see them again.

This post is a stand in for the entire second half of this filmic journey -- I'll link the original 5 posts that make up the first part below. But instead of reposting all of my reviews for all of these titles (the original posts for these are on Pillowfort), I'll just share some highlights below the cut.

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4 // Part 5

Bleaker and darker than I expected, but that makes sense if it's based on a WWI memoir. What happened to Martha was legitimately awful and hard to watch. Stilted performances aside, I would have also liked a whole separate movie about the lesbian spy aunt. But Commandant Oberaertz... [redacted]. He's so hot, despite the character being absolutely awful and creepy and intimidating. I actually said "wow" out loud about his body shape in that costume. That jacket is fitted within a millimeter of its life. How many other films did Connie use this lower register in? Not many, right? It's too much, TOO MUCH. I think this movie took ten years off my life.

I Was a Spy, 1933

Dir. Victor Saville

⭐3/5

Watched Feb 18, Snowgrouse's masterpost

Connie's performance in this is more sympathetic than it has any right to be. The movie very easily could have been sensationalist garbage, and I'm so glad it was handled with relative care and humanity. I liked his whole vibe, I am not immune to party boy Rasputin's charms; "he's got the kavorca, the lure of the animal!" He looks like he stinks, which in this case may not necessarily be a bad thing. I don't even know what to make of all the cooing and baby talk he does with Alexei, or for that matter Drunk!Rasputin dancing and climbing over furniture to get at his ladies. I wish we got to see more scenes with Rasputin and the royal family, how those relationships formed and affected matters of state. We only really get to know about any of that through dialogue among other court officials. And so the emotional turn at the ending was unexpected. The way he cried out after being shot, I've never heard a sound like that come from a human being. Needless to say I did not feel great when the movie ended, but I liked it way more than I thought I would.

Rasputin, Dämon der Frauen, 1932

Dir. Adolf Trotz

⭐3/5

Watched Mar 23, Archive.org

Almost all the performances in this are pretty excellent. The stripped back, realistic style with handheld, newsreel camerawork really suits these actors and the story. Apparently this is a remake of an English film which is based on a play, and it definitely feels like a play. I'm fascinated by this little movie, it's basically an anti-war film about British soldiers in WWI produced in Germany in the early 30s… how did this even get made?? Messages about the horrors of war aside, the homoerotic undertones (overtones?) alone make this a truly unique piece of storytelling for the time and place it was filmed. And those under/overtones are treated pretty respectfully, none of these men are the butt of a joke, how they are with one another is handled with a naturalism that isn't really seen again until maybe the 1950s. And Connie. The range. Can we talk about Stanhope? He's a gruff, messy drunk, a traumatized, hollowed out husk of a man. When Osbourne says something like "you'll be alright when this is over," NO HE WOULDN'T, HE'D BE WORSE. His relationship with Raleigh is interesting too, clearly they were more than casual friends. I didn't believe for a second that the tension between Stanhope and Raleigh was about the sister/fiancée, it's weak, weak I tell you. It's one of Connie's most underrated performances.

Die andere Seite, 1931

Dir. Heinz Paul

⭐3.75/5

Watched Apr 27, Snowgrouse's masterpost

Everyone in this movie looks like a Rankin Bass stop motion character. The ending was abrupt as fuck, Werner Krauss' Jack the Ripper got a lot less screen time and I wonder if they just tacked that onto the end after they realized they spent too much time on Emil Jannings' and Connie's characters. There's a lot of fondling going on in this movie, there's the guy with the bread in the first part, then Connie going all glassy-eyed caressing his globes. Ivan the Terrible is a certified DIVA in that diaphanous, white robe, even with the hard middle part and scraggly beard. What is he doing with his tongue the whole time, though?? Love that he crashes some random girl's wedding, lets her father get murdered by assassins, kidnaps her AND her husband, and brings them both home to his sex dungeon. Connie is doing the most -- the eyes, the gestures, all the greatest hits from his silent film acting tool box, he's whipping them out for this role.

Das Wachsfigurenkabinett (Waxworks), 1924

Dir. Paul Leni, Leo Birinski

⭐2/5

Watched May 29, Archive.org

I didn't like this movie, I just wanted an excuse to post this screenshot. But it actually is a very silly little movie, with what must have been an enormous budget for costumes and sets, and it has some cute physical comedy. Sadly, Connie's in too little of the film to save it from being obnoxious. I did like the Czar's body double who just wanted to work on his needlepoint, and the Court Spanker who was clearly really into his job. And of course Metternich, that sly dog, that velvet-clad scamp. Between the all the foxy, gap-toothed grinning he does and the way he's going to town on that dialogue, he is as always a pleasure to watch. The English version is on Youtube somewhere, so I may go through that and pick out the time stamps for Connie's scenes because I don't think I could sit through this whole movie again, especially not that stupid fucking "Wien und der Wein" song, jesus christ.

Der Kongress tanzt, 1931

Dir. Erik Charell

⭐2/5

Watched Jun 23, Snowgrouse's masterpost

Apparently this movie was considered a flop, and Connie wasn't super happy with this role and others around this time. I think I must have had that info in the back of my mind somewhere going into this movie, because my expectations were pretty low. So, as usual, I actually wound up liking it more than I thought I would. It's a lot sillier than it has any right to be, but yeah it's ultimately a piece of fluff compared to some of the other heavy-hitting films on this list. I love when Connie has a comedic foil like the Marius character, but it could have been a lot better if the dialogue was snappier and the timing tighter. And Connie's character promises to be this bad bitch at the top of the movie, but all we get is one quick, poorly choreographed sword fight and a whole bunch of nothing after that. There's all this build up, I mean, the character is nicknamed The Black Death, and the movie never really lets the character live up to the name. It's a missed opportunity for sure. That said, the Puffy Shirt with the open collar "ensconced in velvet" (to risk yet more Seinfeld references), jaunty hat, knee-high boots with spurs look is really doing it for me. And THERE ARE PUPPIES. Perhaps the most delightful thing that has ever happened in cinematic history. I couldn’t believe it. Connie picked up the first puppy and said, "You big boy, you!" and I hate him, like full Madeline Kahn Mrs. White "flames… on the side of my face." I hate him so much.

Under the Red Robe, 1937

Dir. Victor Seastrom

⭐2.5/5

Watched Jul 17, Youtube

#my writing #conrad veidt #i was a spy #rasputin dämon der frauen #die andere seite #waxworks #der kongress tanzt #under the red robe

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fourswords · 2 months ago

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the cautiously negative light that the four sword is viewed with in the games never fails to intrigue me. like when you contrast it with the master sword...the master sword is viewed as extremely powerful but in a fundamentally good way. you have things like "The Master Sword, a mighty blade forged against those with evil hearts [...]"/"Link, it is extraordinary that you won the Master Sword that makes evil retreat... With this shining sword..." in a link to the past and "The Master Sword is a sacred blade which evil ones may never touch...." in ocarina of time and "The legendary blade with the power to repel evil...once wielded by the legendary hero himself!" in the wind waker and "The Master Sword is a sacred blade that evil can never touch." in twilight princess and the whole plot of skyward sword. and the list goes on!

but with the four sword you get lines of dialogue like "Be careful. It is said that the body of one who touches this blade will be shattered to pieces. It has mysterious powers..." in the original four swords and that one line from four swords adventures that reads "So you accept the fate of the one who draws this sword?" before link even draws it for SOME fucking reason. and it's SOOOOOOO interesting to me, especially considering the lore provided in the manual that when the hero of the four sword first sealed vaati and left the sword behind, the people who built the shrine around the sword didn't even believe that the sword could split somebody into four!!!! and yet. rumors spread anyway. they built the shrine and left the seal alone anyway. generations later, directly following the hero of the four sword in the timeline, you had zelda telling link to "be careful" around it anyway. it's like the only game in which the four sword is viewed as wholly positive is the minish cap, which makes sense because, y'know, we as players and the characters in the game know that it used to be the picori blade, a blade of light, the "sacred sword", that came as a gift from the minish and was once used by the hero of men. and it was reforged into the four sword by a child wanting to save his friend! it's also a good sword! and the characters in the game ALSO KNEW THAT because link was running around using it to change people back after they were turned to stone!

so like. did the hero of the four sword just have really freaky vibes or something. because HE'S the apparent turning point when it comes to how the sword was viewed by the general populace. he's the guy who literally made the surrounding townsfolk be like "well we don't BELIEVE this story about that kid who wandered in out of nowhere magically splitting into four people............but yeah no we're not going to chance it. let's build a shrine. let's carve vaati being defeated by the four swords into stone as a message to future generations." man they've got the hero of light all the way down in the child timeline during four swords adventures freaking out about "accepting the fate of the one who draws this sword" what HAPPENEDDDDDD

#for the millionth time. WHAT'S HIS FUCKING DEALLLLLL WHY IS EVERYTHING SURROUNDING HIM SO FUCKING WEIRDDDDDD #WHY WERE HIS SPLIT SELVES REFERRED TO AS 'ENTITIES' AND 'BEINGS' IN DIFFERENT RETELLINGS OF HIS LEGEND #i feel like that one fucking 'i've connected the two dots/you didn't connect shit/i've connected them' meme #except i actually haven't connected shit. it's just a bunch of newspaper clippings pinned to a board with red thread connecting them #fs #mc #fsa #txt

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thelikesoffinn · 11 months ago

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been thinking about it lately and Ascended Astarion = Dead Dove content and I'm not sure that's really understood, even by the writers. when I finally got around to the character I decided to ascend him with, I was SUPREMELY disappointed by the conversations options following it. it seemed like the dialogue choices were trying to push the narrative on my character that they made this choice w/o considering the consequences and they are bound to regret it. the closest I could get to answering his question of "why did u let me go thru w it?" was "I wanted u to be powerful".

but with that character? my accept Bhaal durge? that isn't the reasoning. at all. (related: "what do u want as a reward?" "ur body" was the closest answer my character could give. otherwise I'd've answered "murder :))")

for context, this run was born of a conversation w my friend discussing supposed content no one had seen bc "no one's that evil". we thought, what's more evil than killing literally every npc? I failed the conceit of the challenge immediately bc I can't handle senseless animal cruelty in my games. killing children? fine (u need a mod to do this in BG3, but I am thankfully plenty delighted to use mods), killing a neutral animal npc? no can do.

so I started this durge (they are the only character that can come close to "killing" Gale with that first interaction) run with the intention of killing everyone except Shadowheart (only a cleric of Shar can truly kill Aylin) and Astarion (bc I need to smooch him). (and there is a mod for playing an origin character as durge, which would have meant playing as Shadowheart, but I MUST smooch Astarion and I don't tend to do het or female romances, unless I'm forced to (*sighs dreamily* oh, Garrus Vakarian). I'm just not interested in that set of equipment in that way, so may as well just make a durge dude.) somehow something went wonky and Halsin ended up joining us and I was so perplexed I just allowed him to stay. (he's meant to attack if u destroy the grove but free him anyway, but instead he just showed up that night and went straight into his Moonrise spiel. is it bc the wolf Silver never aggro'd me and thus survived???) so I fixed the Shadow Curse all while killing every single humanoid and hostile animal in acts 1 & 2. including Thaniel, which makes Halsin's talks later in act 3 of getting news from Thaniel and the Grove hysterical. idk what I did but I sure as hell broke this poor man.

(on a related note, Halsin will give out to u when u accept Bhaal, but will still give u the "u have exceeding my expectations, also we should bang" in the same conversation. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID BUT IT'S DARKLY FUNNY.)

in the conversation when Astarion is expressing surprise that u let him go thru w it, my durge is just like, yes my motivation is that I like to kill ppl :))). it's not a sex thing for him (that is separate from the murder!), but he's still fine w the outcome. yes, Astarion looks down on him, but that's fine! he's allowed to be wrong about that, durge doesn't care. so long as Astarion lets him kill ppl he genuinely just does not give a shit.

(I actually had the idea that if Halsin were to ever rediscover his morals and tried to leave he'd ask Astarion to turn him so Halsin would not have a choice. as I said, this durge *does not fucking care*.)

this is probably the only character I will play that would let Astarion ascend bc I enjoy dead dove SOMETIMES, but not always or in large doses, but I get so few dialogue options that convey that in an rp sense! I don't think the writers/devs REALLY took that into consideration, sometimes. like, yeah, there are going to be ppl making fucked up choices but surely no one would go THIS far! for THIS reason! honey, u need to look up the Dead Dove tag on AO3, there are absolutely ppl making choices for those fucked up reasons.

(and I understand the whole "this confirms to Astarion about sex yadda yadda". even if that's not Tav/Durge motivation, that's how ASTARION would *interpret* it.)

(oh yes, and also, don't let Orin abduct Yenna. it doesn't matter whether u find out in camp or the sewers, Grub will not survive. I was devastated. if I'd known, I would have made sure Halsin was available for her, but she won't abduct a party member or someone ur romancing.)

long story short, I want to play a durge that even ascended Astarion finds unsettling. that's the dream.

Hello there, duck!

Your run sounds delightfully evil! I wish I could play one of those, haha, but I'm too soft hearted. My one evil run with my durge Salira was ended before even entering the grove because I felt horrible after getting rid of Gales hand! Seriously, I can barely take killing the squirrel as durge, and I always save Alfira because I feel horrendous otherwise!

(Fun fact, on all five runs I've done Yenna just vanished at some point and grubs was left standing in my camp, which was like...eh?)

And yes, Halsin is always somewhat of an issue, isn't he? He's just running around, causing mayhem in peoples games because he seems slightly bugged out, haha. I had one run, where he wouldn't go to the spot where we save Thaniel because he joined the fight against Marcus at Last Light and somehow got stuck, for some reason. Same run, none of his vocals would play, which was also very interesting. Everybody would make noise when they climbed or got hurt but Halsin was always silent and just there! And in another run the dude really straight up hated me - he was so mean and snappy, I swear to god he wanted my Durge dead - and then he suddenly went: "Hey you're super cool and strong and I just want to gently fuck you beneath the moonlight if you'll let me" and I was like: Say what.

Regarding the dead Dove: I've talked to people of Discord before, and some of them mentioned something similar a couple of times, but personally, I do think the writers actually knew what they were doing here!

Of course, I do agree that it relies heavily on the regret notion and that it somewhat shoehorns you into a certain narrative corner, I noticed that too when I was ascending him for research - I hated doing that, but all for the asks, haha - but I thought it was really fitting for what it is!

The bad ending, that is. I know we all somewhat forget that because of how people view him as a character, but ascension is the bad ending. Even on an evil run, where your character may have considered all options, it is very likely that Tav hasn't accounted for one very important part of being a true vampire.

The obsession.

It's still somewhat mild in the game, though definitely there, but it will only get stronger as time goes on, and it will probably get to the point that the only escape is death. Either his or Tav's. So, in the end, ascension will come with an armload of regret and the writers were making sure we know that.

And, on top of that, even if we let him ascend in a pursuit for power - or in in your durge's special case: murder :) - we still cast spawn Astarion aside because he doesn't fit our needs, thus making it very clear to him that who he is isn't enough and his behaviour is the price we now pay.

It's pretty much the same with all the other companions as well - justiciar Shadowheart and ascended Lae'zel, for example. However, it doesn't bother us as much, because we have different expectations towards ascended Astarion than, for example, dark justiciar Shadowheart. We don't expect a positive narrative here, a narrative where becoming shady-shar's loyal subject isn't an objectively dumb decision to make, so we don't mind the dead dove as much. It's exactly what we've been expecting - and Aylin even warned us how Shadowheart would change upon becoming a dark justiciar - so yepp. This went exactly how we thought it would and this is what we wanted.

Astarion, however, is a somewhat special case, because his bad ending is, by far, the one that gets the most romanticised. He's so heavily romanticised by so many, that the bad parts nearly start to fade, even with those who don't like the ascended ending. It becomes just 'the other ending', if you will.

And yet, it's still the bad ending.

Ascension is the bad ending for a character that we've somewhat given up on. That we misunderstood so deeply, mayhaps, that we traded his entire being for power and, quite frankly, beauty. We showed him that he isn't enough, we let the boy run and hide the only way he knew how and now we're faced with the consequences and yes, it's really dead dove but...what did we expect?

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