#<- that's a half joke but imagine if it fucking does I will die

[eats-the-stars]

feeling pretty frustrated lately. i feel like my sister is in a "eat your cake and have it too" situation that is making me kind of resentful.

living situation is this: our dad, me, my sister, her boyfriend, their two kids (2 and 5).

the problem is that I think my sister is, without any malicious intent, using me as a replacement parent to her kids. because her boyfriend does jack shit and gets away with it because I'M picking up the slack.

he's not a bread-winner or a stay-at-home dad. he makes basically no money at his "hobby-job" as a martial arts instructor. like, barely breaks even, which i know because my sister does his taxes (and everything else). he does TWO chores. puts away clean laundry and unloads the dishwasher. he also watches the 2yo for a few hours 5 days a week. like 2-4 hours tops. nothing else.

i work Friday/Sat/Sun, sister is home sat/sun, and on Fridays, or if i work a Wednesday, he takes the 2yo to his mom's place so she can watch him.

in comparison, I watch the 2yo 4 days a week from the moment i wake up until my sister gets home at 4pm with the 5yo.

I do mealtimes, bath-times, brushing teeth, homework, bed-times, doctor/dentist appointments, outings, play-times and also contribute to rent, get groceries for the kids and my sister, cook for them (sister also buys groceries and cooks, boyfriend does not), and clean. with 2 toddlers the cleaning is intense and constant. especially in the kitchen. i'm sweeping, mopping, vacuuming, scrubbing, washing dishes, preparing meals, doing a ton of other random cleaning like wiping countertops, scrubbing down the stovetop, taking out the trash, crushing cans. you know, the stuff you do when you live somewhere.

my sister works as hard as i do. both in terms of making money at her job (I have two jobs, she has one, both with comparable pay). she cooks and cleans.

my issue is that her slacker boyfriend is doing jack shit and living the easy life on the back of the work I'M doing to raise his fucking kids. it's a hard place, because I love my nephews and I'm happy to get to make lunches and help with homework and play in the bath and the backyard and take them to the apple orchard and grocery shopping and play hide and seek and color and read them bed-time stories. it's amazing. BUT. it's also incredibly galling to see him sitting pretty with the title Dad and no effort put in to back it up.

Like, I do all this work, every day, because I love my nephews. I want to make them scrambled eggs and pancakes and keep them clean and happy and healthy. So I'm DOING things to feed them and clean them and make them happy.

He's just sitting on his ass occasionally changing a diaper and making sure they don't totally trash the house and does two chores. And that's it. Done. And somehow that's enough? Everyone else is fine with this?

Slowly losing my mind. Also pissed that my sister is too spineless to either force him to step up, or kick him out. But it makes sense, because the easiest option for her is to do nothing.

She gets me playing the role of Parent #2, and she gets to keep her boyfriend around and avoid the drama of a breakup or the effort of forcing him to do more.

The only one losing out here is me.

But it's hard because I love my nephews and I'll probably never have kids of my own. I would be perfectly fine stepping up to be Parent #2 for my nephews...if Parent #2 wasn't already right here doing fuck all with no pressure to step up his game.

I might need to have another serious talk with my sister about this (I had one before and she said she would make him do more, but "more" just seems to be...not a lot, so...).

If she does nothing, though, I'll just continue being cold to this waste of space and hope that the best reward will be his own fucking kids loving their Auntie more than him. Fingers crossed they get older and think back and realize he was all talk and no action.

Helps that he hates going on any kind of trips with the kids, so he literally hasn't even been there for like 85% of our family outings.

Also one of my nephews has apraxia that makes him incapable of speech, so he uses an AAC device and also ASL, but guess who isn't bothering to learn any sign language? Ding-ding! You are correct, deadbeat dad! all he knows are a handful of simple signs that would be really hard to avoid learning when u live w/someone who signs.

So yeah, sit there jamming out on the couch and sweet-talking my sis all you want, douchebag. I don't know if your kids will hate you for being "just some guy" who also lived in the same house, but they sure won't love you as much as they love me.

[impyssadobsessions]

DPXDC Prompt: Who is Danny Fenton?

Warning: This one will be dark as it contains character deaths and violence.

Danyal replaced Danny Fenton a long time ago. As in the original died and Danyal needed a place to hide.

He could have killed him or maybe there was an accident. But he's been masquerading as Danny Fenton for a long time.

But imagine Danyal Al Ghul did kill a kid to take his place. Or at least might have put him out of his misery of something tragic that happened.. as if he wasn't stalking homes to try and pretend to be someone's else's child after leaving the league.

Wasn't "his" fault the kid was stupid enough to cross paths and get hurt.

Though guilt does follow him as he pretends and easily slides into the kids life. Reason he "starts" to drift from Jazz, she's the only one that eyeing him too closely and he doesn't like it. Blame it on her being a nag.

Its why he survived the portal incident. He was already contaminated.

All this to avoid having to fight his brother and being kicked around by his grandfather.

Only to have karma bite him in the ass. Not only he failed to come back fully- unlike the pit rage that made you forget yourself- this form seems to make every regret and terrible action dig its claws deeper in every painful way.

Even worse if you play the whole phantom is a ghost combined with Danny.. so phantom is danny fenton.

Now he's lost anything he could have pride in. Thanks to his accident, he's had harder time controlling his body.. especially with his powers. Clumsy. Uneven. He knew he was out of sorts from not practicing but he doubt he be this bad.

His life forever now half of either existence. He couldn't pretend anymore. Once his new parents find out- they would try to kill him.

Back to square fucking one.

And this time. He doubt even his brother or mother would lend a pity hand. Not like he would want it.

AMG just now thought maybe he would go to Gotham after he killed Vlad and was caught by the Fentons.

He warned Vlad and told him he was getting onto his last nerve. Even told him that Jack wasn't his dad and Maddie wasn't his mom, hell he wasn't even Danny Fenton. But if he had to tell him who he was he was going to regret it.

Vlad went even harder losing interest in Danny- only for Danny to make a sword with his powers and show Vlad WHO he was.

He was trying to be like his father- batman. He is the grandson of the demon king- and former member of league of assassins.

Vlad begging when he realizes Danny been holding back and actual death is on the horizon. "I'm Danyal Al Ghul. And I'm tired of you."

Danny did do it to save everyone permanently but after brutally killing Vlad- is when first his friends show up to warn him about his parents just to see what he done.

Danny laughing awkwardly like.. you-you saw that.. didn't you? heh- Then Fentons barge in. Jack is emotional wreck.

Actually getting a few good hits in, before Danny decided to play dead again and let Jack think he destroyed him.

Flying back to gather his stuff to leave permanently. He couldn't take the guilt of looking at Jack's face. Danny Fenton is dead anyways.

Only to be confronted by Jazz later who shakily asks if Danny is her brother.

Danny being honest, "no."

"For how long?" Jazz saying she knows it had to be before the accident.

"…we we're 8."

Jazz asking trying not to sob did he kill him.

"Mercifully." Then explains he was going to die anyways-

"You don't know that-"

"Actually I DO. I know what it takes to KILL someone, what could allow someone to live. That's something I DO know. And if he had managed to live he would be a vegetable." Explaining how the injury to his spinal cord was not recoverable. just imagine its so bittersweet, because Jazz does love her brother still. But Danny has been a lie this whole time.. or at least being Fenton was. Most of the laughs have become real, jokes, the friendship.

But Danny knows he can't fix this.. so he leaves.

Jazz torn whether to beg him to stay or to go.. and just ends up choking up watching him leave.

thus Danny not sure where to go decides its bout time he at least sees his father.

whether he let him see him or not is undecided.

Jack will either be blame for the murder of Vlad, or Phantom will be exposed.

Either way. Danny knew he royally fucked up.. again.

Ooo what if Danny does join the bats but insist he just wants to be a normal teen. Has a fully researched and planned backstory… mostly leaving out things because its "hard" to talk about. How he lived from foster home to foster home pretending to be different children until he just escape.

Until Jazz , Sam , and Tuck come to find him. Having audio where Danny stated he was the son of batman. Danyal Al ghul. So they figured if they find batman. They might find Danny.

Sam and Tucker want answers.. also mixed about Danny.. but dammit they been through so much.. HOW COULD HE keep that from them? They're not going to let him runaway from this. Tucker also adds unless he threatens to kill us.

Jazz had resolved her feelings. Analyzing everything since Danny was 8. When the switch happened. What was him acting and when the real Danyal appeared.

And had decided she didn't care. Danny was her BROTHER. And honestly is the only thing she has left right now. And she wants him back. Wants to help him heal, wants to help him.

Sam and Tuck want their answers then decide what to do from there. They don't WANT everything they knew to be a lie.

And now Batman is aware of more of his son- Damian knowing more of what his twin been up too.

Its a race to get answers out of Danny before he figures it out and disappears for good.

Can see Damian being the best to help Danny through this. Especially since Jon and Dick helped him not feel so bad about the league.

Danny though pointing out- "Difference, the league didn't make me kill a kid, nor a pathetic billionaire."

"You're right. It would have made you kill me."

Danny just breaks.

Thus finally able to admit all his guilt and how terrible he feels about himself. How he TRIED to be like Father but.. he failed so hard. He failed. He failed EVERYTHING. Just a loser. A failure. A waste. Only to be reminded that if he was one- he wouldn't have so many people wanting to know him. He's scared to face his friends' and sister. He knows its gonna hurt. And it does. But even though he isn't forgiven there is hope things can move on from it. Sam and Tucker will have some serious trust issues and take a while to decipher what part is Danny and what isn't. Meanwhile, yes Jazz feels betrayed. She understands and mostly just want to get to know HER brother more.. Danny more. Hope this opens up the wall she wanted to break down this whole time. And as long as Danny shows her who he is, and tries to work on himself. She doesn't care who he was or how he got there. Also he has to show her what he done with her little brother's body and give it a proper burial. Which Danny happily will- giving it a proper burial.. not showing jazz. He's still afraid she'll immediately hate him once she does. Also can see Bruce being so conflicted but Damian, Dick, and Jason all standing up for Danny. Especially Jason once hearing why Danny killed Vlad was to PROTECT his family and town. He gave him fair warning.. So imagine Bruce and Danny having hard time getting along after everything is revealed. But more so just Bruce unable to comprehend the conflicted emotions. Danny tried to emulate him.. but failed. But he tried to do good.. yet he still killed. So its more so awkward than anything. Bruce still wants to give his son the best. Then I can see Danny helping out- though he keeps phantom a secret from the public. He's always invisible or barely seen.

[mellowwillowy]

I NEED TO TELL A YANDERE BLOG ABOUT THIS NSFW HEADCANON I HAVE-

Imagine a yandere that bought one of those super high quality sex dolls and dresses it up as you with stolen clothes and puts a wig on to match your hair color, etc, used it constantly calling out your name, etc

Also imagine you finDING IT- oml

- ☀️anon

☀️ nonnie you beeg brained :D

ᴡʜᴏꜱᴇ ʟɪꜰᴇ-ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴅᴏʟʟ? (ɢɴ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ)

♥ warnings — general yandere warnings, reader is a dom? and yan is a subby... doll and yan wears lingerie, degradations toward yan, sub-dom, worship - Master play, slapping and mention of sounding.

—𝒀𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒐𝒃𝒆𝒓 - 𝑳𝑰𝒇𝑬 𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒋𝒆𝒄𝒕 𝑬𝒗𝒆𝒏𝒕, ʙʟᴜᴇ

By just dressing this silicone doll in the correct wig, outfits, and makeup and dousing it with perfume, he gets to practice all his fantasies on it. It almost looks like you now, especially with how accurately it's dressed since it is indeed your clothes that he stole. He does enjoy dressing it up with the type of outfits you wouldn't usually wear.

All is great but not the best.

Why? It's not you after all. It's just some silly expensive doll that is dressed to look like you to satiate his needs. Nonetheless, what's better than 0? 1. And that is this doll, a 1/100.

It's mostly used for menial stuffs such as a morning bed buddy, a company for breakfast and a company for when he's sat in front of the computer for a long time, alone.

But when night falls?

"Fuck–, be good." He grunts as he slams his cock into the doll, mindlessly calling out your name like some sort of prayer, eyes rolling to the back of his head. The doll is totally abused by him every night, dressed in countless themed outfits.

"Yeah, yeah, gonna cum, gonna paint you white from the inside fuck-!"

His pace grows erratic, breath raggier and tongue lolling out like a dog. He's already on cloud nine over a doll, what will it be if he's fucking the real deal instead?

"Ah- fuck, gonna cum-!"

The sound of beeping suddenly rings, cutting his panting in half as his eyes are trained toward the door.

Beep. Clack.

"Hey Blue, brought ya' the goods.... s...?"

Your eyes go up and down. Him, naked with a doll beneath him, his cock buried inside the doll, shielding your eyes from it. Hand tugging on the wig of your hairstyle and the clothes you thought you had somehow lost lying on the floor, not to mention the whole room smells like you!

"Uhh... am I supposed to... knock or ring the doorbell from now on?" You motion toward the door as you try to avert your gaze toward somewhere else. Ah yes, the framed photo of you two looks good on the cabinet.

"Wa-wait, wait, don't, I mean, stay! I mean, go-! Arghh..." Blue stutters as he pulls out, his hardened cock now on display for you to see. So he is a grower...?

"Listen, I mean, fuck, look anywhere but me!" Blush creeps into his face as he wraps the blanket around his waist, striding toward you in panic.

"I got ya' the lemonade and uh..." You fail. Your eyes are just a pair of curious souls, looking at how his bulge is seen poking through the blanket.

"... shitfuck. Never knew ya' a grower"

"This is no time for joke..."

"You want the awkwardness to die down or nah pal?"

Blue stays silent for a moment before crouching down in annoyance. He should have just chainlocked the damn door today!

"Been wondering why I've been missing some of my clothes and undies, ya' into stealing or just broke?"

His cock is supposed to be limp by now but it's not. It's twitching from your last words. What has gotten into his head?

"And that lingerie? Oo... never knew yer' a kinky one." Your foot nudges his shin before his bulging cock, giving it a rub. Blue shudders from the contact, falling backward on the butt while the blanket slips from his waist, revealing his aching cock that is leaking precum.

"Fucking masochistic aren't ya?"

You straddle him as you place the plastic bag down onto the floor, knee pressed against his bulge while your tongue licks his sweat from his face, hand slowly taking the glasses off his face, is this prescribed spectacle?

"My pretty boy."

You walk toward the bed and sit on it, your eyes trained on the naked doll, it looks almost like you, thumbs up for him for sure. You beckon him closer with your finger, and so he does.

"Would love to see you dressed in lingerie instead, come on, do a favor for me yeah doll?"

Blue gulps as he nods, slowly undressing the doll before wearing it himself, the size doesn't really fit him but it's manageable. His cock twitches every now and then as you watch his figure.

"Lovely, isn't it?"

"U-unh..."

"Did you pick this lingerie while thinking how it'll look like if it's wrapped around my body? How the color will suit me... how easy the access would be for you to just..." You sandwich his cock with your feet, rubbing it up and down, "feel me like I'm doing to you right now?"

Blue shakes as he moans out, his knees slowly turning into jellies. He needs you, to feel you all over. And so he pleads, "Please..."

You raise your eyebrows, "Please what?"

"Please... do me... yeah?"

You smack his cock with your foot, "Is that how you are supposed to talk to your Master?"

Blue gulps before kneeling down, his lip moving to your foot pressing kisses on it while occasionally licking it, "Please, Master." You try your best to bite your excitement back, eyes swirling in lust as you focus on the lovesick mutt in front of you. You'll collar him later but for now, he is your doll, yours to toy with just like how he's been toying with this doll.

"Come," You pat your thigh, "Let me feel that cheek of yours."

Blue nods and brings his face closer to yours, you can feel his breath fanning you. Your finger pokes his cheek before it turns into a palm that feels his cheek, hard. You slap him.

"Be good, else I'll fucking squeeze a pipe down your cock."

Blue shivers from the idea of sounding. That would totally feel so good, right? His cock starts leaking even more pre-cum, spoiling your thigh with the white liquid.

"Fucking mutt in heat. Why not rut yourself with my thighs?"

It only takes that for Blue to raise your legs by the ankles, his cock in between your thighs as he ruts himself in and out, panting like a dog in heat. You pinch him in response to his action, too bad you couldn't reach his nipple.

"Fucking slut." You rip the lacy lingerie as you claw him, nails digging into his hips, "Gonna fucking chew your cock off later until it's minced."

Blue's cock twitches again from your words, pace even more erratic now. "Please do so!" He is close, you can see it. But he knows better than to come before you allow him to first. "Please, please, please, lemme cum? Need one out so bad, hurts so much."

"Ah? Do I look like I care?" You scowl at him for pulling one of your legs away from him, kicking him by his shoulder, "Fucking mutt, go hold that until your balls are as good as blue and I wouldn't even care."

Blue whimpers at your words but his excitement only grows even more, it only pushes him even further from his limit.

"Please, please, please I beg you. Please..." He begs as he rubs his face against your foot, peppering it with kisses and licks, "Please let me come, just one word I'm all done, please..."

You sneer at him before kicking his face lightly, "Give me a twirl."

He twirls. "Show me how needy your cock is." He shows it to you, lifting the veil for a clearer view. "A striptease for me." He strips, eyes never leaving yours until you suddenly jerk him off, "Good boy... come on." You rub him even faster, his hip bucking toward you for a better angle, "Come, my pretty doll."

Rope of cum soils your feet not afterward, your name rings in the room as he pants, trying to grasp reality after how cum-dazed he was. You rub your spoiled feet against his pelvis, soiling it with his cum as well.

"Come," You open your arms wide for him to dive his face into your neck. You kiss his ear as you caress his hair, muttering praises at him.

"Wanna try the real deal now?"

[sillygoosealert]

hiii🌚🌚 you should totally make a little thing where we’re running from danny during a trial and get stuck in a window while trying to vault and yk.. he fucks us from behind and it’s like a “help me step bro i’m stuck🥺” kinda position yk HEHEHE 😈😈😈

Sorry i fell off the face of the earth for a few days i had to like idk reset myself ☆(≧∀≦*)ﾉ

Never say step bro I'm stuck again I'm not even joking I'll block you, Stinky

Danny Johnson NSFW, raw, has no aftercare, and a little plot but mainly smut, he’s MEAN (cannon bc because he murders people), um actually he's also COCKY (cannon bc he kills people), and he calls you piggy ( cannon because he likes horror and that is a black Christmas reference) knife stuff

Fog whisps around you as you are forced into another trial. Another day another round. Is it day, or is it night? You may never find the answer.

The entity is cruel in your clothing, a skirt to your mid-thigh, and a button down. Nothing to keep in the warmth. Nothing to hide you from the reality that is the cold red forest.

You think your teammates must all be together- not including you, because a generator is done at lightning speed. Then you hear guttural screams, plural, also at lightning speed. Maybe you shouldn't get them, you'll too just die. Survival of the fittest. They won't remember the trial if you let them die, it's like they have a reset- or something.

You're crouching, lurking, and waiting. Not for long, as The Ghostface jumps out at you.

‘Boo’

He's snickering and taunting you. Mocking the screams of your now-fallen teammates.

A jungle gym is in sight, if you abuse the window and stun him, perhaps the hatch could be located. Maybe you're too tubby, or maybe because the entity is against you, but the window gets blocked from the top halfway through. You do not make it, you are stuck.

He’s snorting and making animal noises behind you.

‘What’s the entity feeding you that you can’t get through the windows?’

‘Oh, it’s blocked.’

He grabs your thighs and tries to pull you out. However, his pullout game must be weak as you do not budge.

He keeps his hands on your thighs as he whistles.

‘Can you not get out?’

‘No?’

‘Does this happen a lot?’

‘First time actually’

You're shivering, it's too much. He's too casual about it.

‘I could cut you in half and play magician, that would be rather amusing ’

‘Please don't’

‘Do you have something else in mind, piggy?’

Nothing. Actually, you're crying a little, but you don't say anything.

He starts to coo and awe at your noises, rubbing and kneading your ass.

He goes around to your other side and pulls out his camera. You’re a mess. Wiping away tears from your cheeks and eyes.

‘That's it. Perfect. That's the picture I'll keep of you.’

He’s taking a couple photo’s. More than needed. Maybe he likes it when you cry, the glossy kind of look.

‘Just me and you babe, whatever will we do?’

He snaps the band on your panties. You just realize nothing is left to his imagination from where he is now standing again.

‘Are you scared?’

‘A little’

There isn't any reason to tell the truth or lie to him. But you think he likes it when you're scared, something kinky.

The cold plastic of his mask is pressed into your ass. He's sniffing you..?

You can feel the squeeze of his hands on your thighs, groaning into them.

He takes off the mask, not that you can him. But the feel of his warm tongue is enough to assume he took it off.

But that's not the only thing to come off, as he slips off your panties as well.

Spreading open your folds, you can hear the shudder of the camera as he takes pictures of your pussy.

You know it's wet, it was dripping on your underwear. What lewd photos he now will have. Blackmail material?

He begins sucking on your clit, shoving his face into you.

Messy, unplanned, and purely out of want.

That's not how Danny usually went. Besides all the times he did things out of rage, like the laser tag incident..

After he's mixed his spit into your cunt, he's ready.

Pulling up his cloak and pulling down his pants, he stares at you.

You're pretty. And you have a nice ass.

Maybe you would make a good girlfriend, maybe.

But he just wants to fuck you right now, really hard

He pumps himself before sliding in.

He's thick, but also kinda lean?

You're shaking again, this is much too abrupt for you

Pinching your leg, he pulls out his blade.

‘A little blood never hurt anyone, right?’

He starts to cut into your thigh. His thrust growing more erotic

Putting the knife away, he smacks the place he just sliced up

Yelping, you start to cry, again.

‘I like that- you crying. Sob for me’

‘You're doing good, do you like merely laying there as you get violated? This could happen to anyone, whore or not. Does that scare you?’

A rhetorical question, he just wants you to cry while he scratches your bleeding leg.

He starts to rub your clit, whipping his knife out again.

‘Where do you want me to put my signature?’

‘It hurts- stop, please..’

Caving GF into your back is a blur to both of you, as he is still occasionally slapping your body around while thrusting considerably too hard

He pulls out and cums all over your wounds, covering them slightly in semen.

‘People would be shaking if they saw this. Are you shaking because of me?’

You didn't even realize you weren't stuck anymore. Only after you fell backward you realized.

‘I'm going to let you go back. But I want you to tell them what I did to you- scare them. Let them know they are not safe from me.’

‘Okay, I promise, I'll tell them’

He picks you up and walks around with you clinging to him.

When you are near the hatch, he puts you down.

‘A picture- for you, to keep’

He's sitting with you on the ground, keeping you in his lap. Putting his face right next to yours- actually, you don't remember when he put the mask back on. You didn't get to see his face.

The light hurts, but he gives you a little polaroid with the two of you face to face, cheek to cheek.

It would be cute if he didn't just cut up your legs

Tucking the photo into your bra, he drops you into the hatch. How kind of him.

He waves goodbye, you do not wave back.

It wasn't bad, it was just a lot. Rushed? Scary? Harmful?

Kinda hot, but you really hope he doesn't keep those photos. For blackmail reasons..

🎀

[tanoraqui]

Dungeon Meshi Liveblog: In Which Izutsumi is Ace and also possibly a Time Lord

I heard that troll!Marcille is shredded. I heard she has an eight-pack.

(I can't believe that wasn't just the end of the chapter. I can't believe this wasn't the end of this book. What the fuck is going to happen in the NEXT chapter?!)

.

omg, baby!Chilchuck! He once had hope in his eyes and joy in his heart!

.

I just think he and Kabru should compare notes, by which I mean gossip.

.

Laios: [explaining a new monster]

Marcille:

.

Wait that's actually dodgy as fuck. Did they say something to her while Chlchuck was briefly in the bathroom or something? Threaten her?

.

Marcille's imagine spot as Chilchuck's wife reminds me of that episode of Scrubs where each person imagines themselves married to Elliot. Amazing, no notes.

.

Marcille's so valid tbh. He clearly lied before when he said he had only 1 daughter - he could easily be lying now, for all they know.

.

....huh. Book 9 is the first book to have 6 chapters instead of 7. Story drama, or publication drama?

.

this is sitcom-tier stuff. fantastic.

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Marcille: [dies and gets resurrected]

Marcille: :D :D :D I am going to study this! :D :D :D

(Marcille: So that nobody I love needs to ever die again. :) :) :) )

.

She is, however, distinctly avoiding this question about her age.

.

Izutsumi, confirmed for ace icon?!

.

Izutsumi confirmed for ace icon!!

.

Nooo babygirl! You have so much heart, it's just not exercised enough!

,

<3 :3 <3

Also, Izutsumi also confirmed for Time Lord, I guess! (And her human half may be ace but her cat half is thinkin' about a big, good-looking panther ;3

.

The very first image we see of Chilchuck's daughters is of a nightmare of them axe-murdered?! Geez louise.

.

I don't even care if it's a demon or a god, I just laughed aloud so hard. Impeccable transition. I think the comedic timing in this comic might be getting better as it goes on.

Shoutout to Laios for being so weird that the succubus just had to kinda guess, "uhh only properly humanoid girl in the party?" for his greatest desire, until presumably it got close enough to pick up a more detailed impression.

.

Hm. So, it's not lying...

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...nvm, now it probably is (lying).

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Oh yes this is a trap. A seduction.

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/giggling with delight - Oh my god, at the previous panel I was going to make a joke about Samwise the Great, Gardener of the World, ie the temptation vision the Ring gives Sam. But I guess I don't have to, we're just going there directly. What does pure power do to you, Laios?

.

Wsdknsdvl even the Winged Lion is like, "but what about your judicial policy?" I love this comic sooo much.

.

That's 'cuz you're a man.

[purrplegyuu]

Who do you are the kinkiest person in treasure??💕💕

Naur, cause i was talking w my sister about this last week and omg

Jihoon. This man is just out of this world. Here’s the list:

— Size kink, omg would love to feel the way he can hug you with his arms and hide you from everyone easily. Having you underneath him, still struggling to take him whole even after you two fucked many times before… man, there’s nothing he loves more.

— Strength kink, being able to take your body away from the bed easily and fuck you against nothing but the air is something he would kill for.

— Flexibility kink (does that exist?) + bulge kink, I mean, taking both of your legs and folding you in half while he fucks you… he just loves the way he can see his dick through your tummy in that position, and the way he can easily hit your cervix, making you scream loudly.

— Food play, okay, this is not a usual kink for him, but imagine you both eating strawberries with white chocolate, until there’s one only left, and he takes it. You think he’s gonna eat it whole, until you feel him take you face in between his hands, pulling you in a kiss, pushing part of the strawberry in your mouth.

— Ice, be it against your hot nipples or your aching clit.

— Foreplay, you thought he just did it the first time to lube you because it was your first time having sex, however, it became a must—he won’t fuck you until you’ve come at least twice on his mouth or fingers.

— Drug/alcohol use + sexual frustration (kinda), not actually a kink but he wouldn’t deny to fuck you if you ask him nicely after getting out with your friends and getting high and hot because of the drug they put on your drink as a joke. “You’re not gonna die, just ask your ex to fuck you” they said, and there you are.

— Multiple orgasms + overstimulation, i just feel like his stamina is something crazy, like he wouldn’t stop after three orgasms (his, 5 yours), and would keep fucking you even if you cry from sensitivity and ask him to stop many times.

— Teasing, just see him and tell me he won’t mock at your expressions and screams the next week.

— Cosplay kink, my man loves princess costumes…

(Im sorry, I NEEDED to add that father joke😭)

[threepandas]

Bad End: Traps

"Darling~!" A rich voice greeted me, as I stepped through the final doors leading to an opulent office. "You're looking better! Are you finally adjusting to the anti-poisons? I know they made you feel quite sick."

THAT was an understatement. Try worst cramps and fever of my life, with a dose of puking for days. They put me on IVs. Buuuut? I wasn't gonna say THAT. Not a chance in hell. We, team Earth that is, were supposed to be here for DIPLOMACY. So? Fucking LIE~☆

Yep! "Bit" sick. Just a touch. Hardly noticed, really. Took a nap.

Veneni laughed, rising from the elegant sprawl she'd been resting on one of her "not called couches but totally are" things. To be honest, her voice reminds me of those old "radio stars" from the clips at the museums. All smooth yet husky, curling around you, like they're going to invite you somewhere dark to learn a naughty little secret if you're very VERY good.

Kind of voice you could listen too for HOURS, reading the most boring shit imaginable, and it be the best time you'd had in years.

I am... SO gay, for Veneni.

Like? You DO NOT UNDERSTAND. She SASHAYS. Not walks. Not strolls. Sashays! Like life is a catwalk and she is the alpha bitch here to show these other models how it's DONE. But also? Like she doesn't even NOTICE! It's just... effortless. How she moves. All delicate hand motions and rolling hips and curves.

That I Can Not Touch because she is SUUUUPER poisonous.

Which is? Frankly? Homophobic and a crime against me, specifically. Yeah, her whole species is like that. And it's why all of us are suffering through the Anti-poison adjusters. But STILL! I can't even "accidentally" brush her hand? No potential kissing of hot hot hot alien gf? Illegal. Blocked. Everyone here is a bastard and I want to complain.

.....not, mind you, that I have the metaphorical lady balls to actually CONFESS anything.

But you know... maybe.... maybe if I pine hard enough?

Good ol' stand awkwardly nearby and mentally project "NOTICE ME SEMPAI!" At her? I put on my nice outfit! Makes the girls look-! Wait, does her species even give a shit about boobs? FUCK. Okay, see this? THIS is why I was a flight assist. Just inventory and handing stuff to people who knew what they were doing.

MASTER of the fine arts of "I Can Understand The Instruction Manuel, In Case Of Emergency"!

Pretty good at coffee, too. Not to brag.

But, like? Jokes aside? Things had been... Bad.

Everything had gone to shit. Then somehow found a shovel in the manure pile and started digging. Started OUT okay! Really, it had! Travel was unexpectedly a bit rough. Some sort of space storm that went RIGHT over my head, but we dodged every major catastrophe. Got here in one piece.

There was a fancy meeting party. Whiiiich? In hindsight? Terrible idea. WAY too many people with hella poisonous skin, standing WAY too close. Only reason we didn't IMMEDIATELY lose the head diplomate? Was the regulation "new planet, unknown pathogens" full body biosuit. He? Got a HUG. Like... right out the ship.

Oof. That would have been IT, for him. Unfortunately, he didn't make it past that much longer. Someone's pet bit him. And? Yep. Completely fucking venomous. Lethally so. A tragedy, right? Outlier, surely?

Ha!

No. No this planet was trying to fucking kill us. It was a toxin coated hellpit and had so far? Murdered just over half the diplomatic crew. Those that were still alive? Over half of THEM were in emergency care. With just over a forth of the OTHER survivors being the only ones who could safely care for them.

Rest of us were either in isolation or sick as FUCK.

Isolation for those who needed to get rescued, because the Anti-poison adjusters would fucking kill them. Or sick as hell, for those few who remain that finally, FINALLY had found a way to Not DIE.

ALL WHILE PEACE TALKS WERE TRYING TO HAPPEN.

It was a shit show~☆

I? Went from basically a nobody? To "congrats! By merit of NOT being dead or dying, you're the head diplomat by proxy!" Which? Fucking WHAT? You could physically SEE the stress radiating off the poor guys back home, as they tried to speed run me through "how to not Accidentally A War 101".

I was pretty sure his cup, did in fact, NOT contain coffee. But I wasn't telling.

Instead, I got the honor of carrying the video call. Literally. Since our tech was incompatible. I got to carry the whole set up. Portable battery included. So the ACTUAL Really, Actually, Trained In Diplomacy, Diplomat could call in. And then I could look pretty and nod seriously at the appropriate times.

Mmmmhmmm. Yes. I agree. I both understand what is being said, AND support Earth's position on these matters! I have definitely studied the materials. Am supposed to be here. We have DEFINITELY suffered no catastrophic loses, pay no attention to the chaos behind the curtains! Diploooomacyyyyy....

God, she is pretty.

Watching her smile, her sensors gently shift around her like flowing water, the way her hand delicately gestured as she spoke? I... I wanted to build her, like, a cabin or something. Bring her breakfast in bed. Maybe adopt an alien dog together. And like? I don't even KNOW how to build shit. But, fuck it. I'd learn.

Cause I mean... you KNOW you got it bad, when you look at Toxic Super Hell the planet, look at pretty lady, look BACK at the planet that in no uncertain terms ACTIVELY thirsts for your blood... and go?

"So when do I move? Feeling REAL patriotic for my new home! Wooo, New Home!"

Yes I have a problem. Shut up, I'm aware.

A quite click signaled the end of their talks. Finally done for the day. I definitely, in now way shape or form, perk up like an excited puppy hearing the word "walkies". Because that? THAT would suggest I had WAY more dignity. I am a thirsty, thirsty bitch, okay? SO PRETTY. Nice laugh! Calls me Darling!! I have a LIST!!!

"Mmmm, what an unpleasant man that was. Did something happen to Mr. Ho?" She asked, stretching in the slow rolling way of hers. It looked boneless and decadent. REALLY distracting. "I hope nothing Serious~. We were nearly on the cusp of getting you home! I do hope he gets well soon. But, ah~, where ARE my manner today, Darling? You must be starving!"

Veneni sweeps forward to tuck my arm in hers, pulling me against her side. Even through my biosuit and her modest dress... I... I can FEEL her body heat. How soft and warm she feels pressed close against me. She smells tingly and spiced, kinda like citrus and mulled cider. NOT! That I'm smelling her! WHICH I'M NOT!! Because that would be so, SO creepy! It's just-!? You know-?! AaaaaaAAA???

She guides me to our little table. Probably set up for guests in general. But... you know... kinda like to THINK of it? As ours?

I REALLY need to stop while I am ahead. Good fucking gods. Ignore me.

Mmm, yes, distraction cake! Let's talk about THAT instead! Wonder what she-? I then choked on my drink. Because... because after bringing out the usual traditional deserts of she was teaching me about? And dishes I could try? Veneni... c.. casually as you please rests her chin, propped up on one hand, then reaches out with the other... to place it on my hand, which rests on the table between us.

Hear that? That's my soul screaming at a pitch only dolphins can make.

OH MY GOD.

I'd like to say? I don't immediately embarrass myself? But that's a lie. I make a wheeze reminiscent of something dying horribly. Against all odds. She is NOT immediately disgusted and done with me. Dear lord, my parents may actually have a chance at seeing me married! Holy FUCK.

Wait. No. Slow your roll.

SMILE first. We GOT this! Seduce her!

I open my mouth... and stupid fell out. FUCK.

"Calm yourself, Darling!" She laughs, the bemused fondness lighting up her face. "You hardly need to impress ME! Believe me. I knew you were mine the second I saw you. Nothing could possibly change that~"

Her cute fangs catch the light, deadly sharp. Her's is a predatory species. I wonder if they like social touch? Cause I REALLY want to cuddle. Hold hands. Touch. Ooooother stuff~ But! Mostly the Hold Cute Alien GF! Assuming that's where this is headed. Please GOD let that be where this is headed!

"I was thinking... and I don't want to be too forward, of course," oh god please do "and I hope I'm not interpreting things incorrectly!" You are not. Take me you magnificent, purple, high femme queen amongst the masses. "But... I would VERY much like to... get to know you, Darling. On a more... personal level...?"

I kept my lips pressed desperately together to keep from literally shouting the word "Yes" in her face. Be cool. BE COOL! We are both cool and Very Normal About This! Scream in incoherent joy later!

Y..Yeah! Sounds great!

This is the best day of my-!

An explosion shook the biodome. While the whole planet WAS toxic as fuck? There were levels to it's toxicity. Some places too much for even native life forms to handle. And, of course, no place that non-natives could safely survive. Thus the capital's biodome. Highly filtered air, earth, and resources. Built for diplomacy and several critical care hospitals.

Now under attack. Another bomb exploded. Cracks in the dome.

I could only stare in mute horror at the pillar of smoke. Because... Because that was the isolation area. Our evac's. Someone just blew up... Then my brain seemed to comeback online all at once, as adrenaline flooded my system. I looked between the still unpacked call system and Veneni.

A piece of tech or a high ranking, probably high interest target. My maybe hopefully girlfriend. Not really much of a choice.

Fucking LEAVE IT.

We had to go. I pulled Veneni up, told her as much. She looked so startled.

"Of... Of course, Darling. Yes. You're right. I AM probably a target, aren't I?" The thought didn't seem to have occurred to her. God, I felt like a monster having to bring such ugliness to her attention. Scaring her like this. But ignorance wouldn't keep either of us safe.

"I...I think there was a safe room?" She faltered, arms crossing almost artfully, looking so uncertain I couldn't help but want to comfort her. "But, Darling, I'll admit.. I'm.. I think I'm rather scared. Will you protect me? Stay with me? ...please?"

I couldn't help it. She looked so scared. So delicately small. I stepped forward, arms going around her. Pulling her close like I could shield her from the world. I wouldn't let anything happen to her. I promised myself. Felt her arms, a few of her sensors, desperately curl around me.

I didn't see the smile, pressed against my front. That quickly vanished as she pulled back. Nor did I notice the calm technician, hidden in the shadows of a side hall, who nodded at Veneni as I herded her to "safety". Would think nothing of how, tragically, my rooms were hit in the follow up blasts. How very lucky, that Veneni has rooms to spare. But oh~ she would not want to over step!

I don't notice a lot of things. But hey, things are great! I got a girlfriend! Or, as she likes to joke,

She Got Me.

[lee-writes-things]

but like imagine this, if there were deaths in a third soc book:

wylan would die first (from an explosion, oit of irony) because we can all agree he's like a son to kaz, and it would be devastating. so then kaz has all this pent-up emotion. and jesper's unhinged gambling addiction gets worse, which gets kaz even more worried. because he's like a brother to kaz. and he does something reckless on this job, which therefore gets him severely injured, and he dies in inej's arms. and that leads to inej trying to help jesper cope while also suffering internally herself.

when news reaches nina in ravka, she thinks that kaz forged inej's signature at the end of the letter as a cruel joke. she went along with it anyway since she missed when the crows were all together. nina brought a few traditional ravkan treats that she knew kaz liked no matter how much he denied it. when she arrived at the slat, it was empty. nina went to the crow club and found inej with a far away look. she gave up on trying to help jesper with his addiction. im too lazy to be in writing mode, so im gonna half-ass the rest. anyway, nina had to snap inej out of her daze and ask her where kaz was. that's when inej finally broke down, and any word she muttered was incoherent. after what felt like ages, jesper went over to the two girls and told nina what happened. "the ol' dirtyhands finally kicked the bucket. thought he was immortal for a while. wylan went just before him."

there was nothing else but sobs that day and screaming out to the sky why everything that happened happened. bit over a week later, there was a joint service. inej engraved two slabs for the two out of wood with the first knife kaz gifted to her. she renamed it. sankt rietveld. and that's how she got assigned a new job. revenge. with a gloved hand holding her knife. (shitty ending, not enough detail, but here you go)

before, there were six of crows. then five. now only three.

i originally shared this with a server im in and, therefore, was banished to hellgate by my friends for making them all cry. oops. anyway, fuck you guys [affectionately but not really].

[casanovawrites]

random sentence prompts  ━ from various tv shows, part 15

what’s happening to us?

so you’re not sleeping, you’re not having sex. sounds like you’ve been a complete fucking disaster without me.

you know i love you. right?

only thing to remember is take your time, even if there is no time.

i shouldn’t have to fight this hard to be seen.

all of a sudden, everything i thought i was fighting for is gone.

when i think of something to say, it doesn’t seem like enough.

i feel like everything is boring me. 

don’t do anything stupid. or brave.

you can’t imagine what i’ve done to get this far.

i was trying to be a low-maintenance girlfriend.

we’re just friends. it’s… nice. 

i know this seems like the end of the world, but you will get over it. probably sooner than you think.

i know all of the worst things about you. the shit that no one else knows. and i still love you. that’s why we don’t work with anyone else.

i know the difference between someone who cares about me and someone who doesn’t. i’ve been on the other side enough times.

i’ve never seen anybody worse at being in a happy relationship.

is it always like this? does it get worse?

i was too busy dying.

you’re the scariest person here.

i cannot exist with this secret anymore. you don’t understand.

it really is just us against the world, isn’t it?

you’re nowhere near as nice as you fucking think you are. 

you fight dirty. you use people’s worst shit against them.

i’m not your therapist, i should be paid for the shit i have to talk you through.

i honestly adore you.

sometimes i feel like you say stuff just to be a dick, like you store things up and make me feel like shit for no reason.

can it please be enough now?

i never wanted any of this. i didn’t wanna be at war with you.

i loved you. even though i knew exactly who you were, all of the worst things about you. so why do you punish me for that?

i feel sad all the time, and i don’t know why.

it’s not my fault that you feel like shit.

not everything’s a fucking joke just because you are.

i just ruin things, and there’s not even a fucking point to me.

i don’t feel normal. i feel like i’m nothing all the time.

there was a time when i’d do anything for you.

whose blood is that?

it’s a forest full of nightmares. 

only person that i care about is you.

one day you’re gonna make friends with people you actually care about. 

why do you insist on being the most annoying person in every room?

you know you’re a little fucked up?

you have so much love to give. you don’t have to give it all to me.

you can’t move forward if you’re looking back.

you make everyone sad. you make everyone fight.

i wanna feel like a good person again.

all this running and hiding has made me so miserable.

what i do know is that i don’t want to keep hurting you. 

what if i’m just as bad as everyone always said i was? what if i’m even worse than that?

you helped me realize something pretty big about myself.

you know we’d be awful together, right?

you look half dead already. i’ll be quick with the last half.

i think better when i work with my hands, so leave me the fuck alone.

you gotta die somewhere. what does it matter where?

i thought i’d get it right the next time around, but i made it worse.

sometimes, you have to do horrible things. no matter how bad you feel.

there’s something in your eyes, i could tell that you’ve been through stuff. 

i could tell that you were dangerous.

i’m here. and i love you. and i am so, so sorry that i hurt you.

we are all we have. us.

i’m not having a good night.

maybe that’s your cover, hiding in plain sight.

i don’t consider it cheating if it’s more of an exit ramp.

i need you to get your shit together. okay?

women kill for power.

i’m cute, i like when people notice.

is there a world where this works?

has the closeness of death made you feel more alive?

we can be friends because we like each other. not just because we worry about each other. right?

i think i just stopped caring if people think i’m a piece of shit.

it’s easy to move on when someone you trust totally disappoints you.

[cactusisconfused]

Cw- suggestive themes, no smut. Soap has shit gaydar.

-

John ‘Soap’ Mactivish is a proud and out bisexual man and has been aware of that since he was mid-teens.

He’s always been proud of his identity, never was one to shrink down from giving some homophobe a black eye- no matter how many suspensions he got.

He’s had a good few partners, men and women, enough to the point that he thinks he has a good understanding of how this all works.

The only problem is that he had the worse gaydar known to man.

One would think that given how long he’s been in the community he would get better at it, but nope.

So imagine his surprise when the hulking 6’4 lieutenant of his- whom he had presumed to be straight- shows up to a gay bar when the 141 found themselves with down time.

-

Soap had snuck off, whether to get a one night stand in or just a few drinks to wash away the ugly thoughts of their last mission, he isn’t sure and quite frankly, doesn’t care.

He’s maybe 3 glasses of scotch in, maybe four, when a tall ass man built like a fridge sits next to him at the bar. A black face mask sits on the bridge of the man’s Roman nose all the way to his chin. From what soap can see, the man has scars all over his face, some bigger, some smaller- but really what gets him is those brown eyes, framed just perfectly by blonde- almost white eyelashes.

Naturally, Soap spurs up a conversation, hoping the man may have a bed that might need a bit of extra warmth tonight.

The man looks at Soap for a long moment, with an almost calculating look. The man looks long enough to the point where Soap shifts slightly in his seat, worried that he over stepped and the man simply just wanted to drink and nothing more. Yet, to Soap’s mild surprise, the man nods, effectively standing up from his bar stool and laying a 20 out on the table for the bare tender.

The man is quick to start moving for the door, only to pause to look back at Soap.

“You coming here or at my place?” The man says in a deep gravely tone, enough that Soap feels like he can drown in. Soap quickly felt himself blush.

“Fuck off.” Is Soap’s clever retort as he quickly slides off the bar stool and makes his way to the man.

“That’s what I plan on doing.” The man responds simply and fuck, Soap could die here and forever be a happy man.

-

Soap felt like he could barely move the next morning, stretching like a cat on the soft sheets below him, taking count of all the joints that pop.

When he left arm doesn’t pop, he tries again, trying to coax it to pop. What he doesn’t except, as he moves his elbow, is to touch skin.

Quickly, fast enough to make himself dizzy, Soap looks at the man in the bed. His scarred, pale body is bare, the blankets just barely covering below his naval. His deep brown eyes are half lidded, looking up at the Scot.

“Morning to you too, Soap.” That gravelly voice hits Soaps ears like a siren’s melody and-

Wait-

“I never told you my name.” Soap say scrambling off the bed, his mind already set in mission mode. How does this man know who he is? Is he an enemy spy?

Soap’s mind runs through a thousand and one loops trying to figure what to do, when all that is broken by a quiet but hearty laugh from the man in the bed.

“You did, ‘bout seven months ago.”

Soap’s mind races. Seven months ago? That was during the botched mission in Las Almos and-…why is there a skull mask on that desk?

Soap blinks, now focusing on his surroundings. The man’s closet is slightly open, peaking out is almost entirely black apparel, including one navy blue jacket and a jacket with the words ‘Lieutenant Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley’ written on the back.

Slowly, he looks back at the man- at Ghost- who of which wears a smug smile on his bare face.

Maybe all that flirting over the past few months wasn’t just joke between guys….

“C’mon, I’m gonna make some bacon and eggs.” Ghost states as he pushes the covers off, only boxers on, and walks out the room.

Soap, finally blinking out of his stupor rushes afterwards, really hoping this won’t be a one time thing.

-

On this went longer than intended.

Also sorry that this didn’t get too spicy, I don’t write that kinda stuffs :/

[saintsenara]

i just picture George/Angelina being incredibly unhealthy (i love it) George is obviously the “less dominate” twin. Angelina as quidditch captain was dominate, dare i say bossy and had enough self assurance to put her name in the goblet of fire with most people thinking she’d be chosen. after Fred’s death George would be rightfully depressed and pretty broken and Angelina would sort of walk all over him, call all the shots and basically run his life for him while she does really whatever she pleases with hers but he can’t challenge her on it because he never learned how to do that in his adolescence while coming to see her domineering nature as a familiar comfort in his young adulthood even though the relationship would probably serve her growth while stunting his

i must admit i'm very fond of george and angelina as a pairing, and it all being a little bit fucked up is very much why.

although i'm not sure that i would agree with the idea that angelina would walk all over george, so much as that i think the thing that makes their relationship really compelling for authors to explore is how it's rooted in a mutual stasis - a joint attempt to cling on to a bit of the past.

because i think lots of people get that george finding himself entangled with angelina is inseparable from his grief over fred. but fewer people focus on how angelina gravitates towards him for the same reason. while she doesn't actually seem to have any sort of significant romantic relationship with fred [a cheeky fumble in a rose bush at the yule ball is hardly a proposal of marriage...], she's clearly firm friends with both twins while she's at school. she's also a member of dumbledore's army and she fights at the battle of hogwarts. she - like george - loses someone she loves [romantically or otherwise] that day, and she - like george - can be written as someone who blames herself for that.

so i like the idea of george finding angelina a comfort - but only if this feeling is mutual, with each clinging to the other because doing so allows them to repress their grief by letting them never have to progress in processing it. which is, of course, incredibly bad for you.

this doesn't prevent the relationship also being based in much healthier areas of compatibility. angelina is certainly brusque in canon [although she's right to shout at harry, and i'll die on that hill], but she's also got a sense of humour which clearly aligns with george's [she's mentioned a few times throughout the books laughing and joking with him and fred], she doesn't sulk or hold grudges [she immediately gets over harry being selected as triwizard champion], she's pragmatic [she selects ron as keeper over better candidates because she thinks he'll be more committed to the team], she's not a doormat [she doesn't tolerate umbridge refusing to let the quidditch team reform and takes the request to mcgonagall instead], she's loyal [during order of the phoenix she backs ron as keeper much more than harry does - and harry's management of ron in half-blood prince borrows much more from hers than he may realise], and she's brave [the aforementioned fighting in the battle of hogwarts]. it's very easy to imagine that there's lots about being together which is uncomplicatedly enjoyable for both her and george.

but with this happiness always feeling rather more fragile than is usually the case, owing to the spectre haunting them both which both are unwilling to confront.

[seeminglyseph]

Man, I love Swansea. That old man genuinely just didn't want Daisuke to get stuck in a shitty dead-end job that would ruin his life. He could've stood to be less of a passive-aggressive asshold about it, but like... no one really plans on having a manchild having a quarter-life crisis and deciding to do a prolonged-multi-murder-suicide in the middle of your year-long life lesson of an internship.

Swansea regrets his life. Half his dialogue is like, "If you live your life like I do, all you'll have to show for it is a growing collection of aches and pains. Injuries on top of injuries that don't heal all the way and leave you older, uglier, and hurting in ways you never imagined."

Maybe I'm just projecting my blue-collar dad onto him too hard, but like, blue-collar work does like... fucking hurt. It wears the body down and injures a person a million times in a million ways and in order to earn a paycheque you don't take enough time to heal before you go back to work and work yourself hurt again. Every day hurts, you work yourself exhausted, then get up and do it again until your body breaks down to the point you can't do it anymore. Sometimes retirement becomes a joke because how many people die within a few years of retirement if they make it 'cause their bodies have worn down so hard from the work?

And Daisuke's kinda athletic with a lot of go-getter attitude and like... nothing but the fact that his mother thinks he's not doing enough, and the fact he didn't for sure know what he wanted to do with his life yet to say he wasn't like... going anywhere with his life. He was a bit young and immature, but like... he is young. Youth is about learning and being a little immature... Swansea even voices his regret that he would have had a lot to learn from Daisuke about things because of that youthful joy and interest in new things.

I know the core of the game is about Jimmy, Curly, and Anya, but Swansea and his mentorship of Daisuke, and his real ability to take responsibility is like. Damn, love that old man. Even if he had that Boomer trait of only expressing genuine heartfelt emotions at the worst and/or last possible moments.

[screechingfromthevoid]

I'm obsessed with Robbie and Liam romancing each other constantly like yes yes good.

But I've also been turning Cerkonos and Lieve'tel in my head because of it.

I know there's a lot of angst when it comes to life spans. Especially when it comes to (half) elves and Ashari leaders.

At some point it'll be just be Keyleth and Vex. And then just Keyleth, right? Like idk if we know how old the ashari can get but she is going to outlive all of vm, right? That's like the point?

But elves live for a long ass time? Lieve'tel is already 381. She has about 360 more years. And Cerkonos is here until further notice it seems.

Sure maybe they don't spend the rest of their impossibly long lives together but like? Isn't it nice to have the option? If they wanted to they could. Together they don't have to worry about time moving too quickly. They don't have to worry about watching the other wither while they stay youthful.

Lieve'tel had a fling with Bertrand and he probably wasn't her first bout of love at 350. But she seems to really have really cared for him? And she was his last words? As a cleric for the matron I can't imagine she has a bad relationship with death but how does she feel when it grips someone she cares about? We know the matron wears the mask to hide just how much she cares for each and every soul she ferries. And perhaps Lieve'tel feels that same way her goddess does about death and those who pass on. Especially with her extended life.

So Bertrand dies, she doesn't watch him wither, but she knows when he passes. She is given a dream of it. I wonder how she mourns. How long she mourns. If shes still mourning.

Then, by the same string of fate that brought her and Bertrand together, she is brought to Cerkonos. A man similarly endearing. A little bumbling. Definitely intimidated by her. Sweet.

And he ages like her. Maybe a hair faster.

Maybe that's why Cerkonos shows absolutely no interest in Vesper. In Pike. Their mortality is written all over them.

Robbie made a joke about him "retaining his seed since 28" and like fucking lol first off but also. Keyleth was 23 at the beginning of VM? and she was on her aramente? So depending on how long it took for him to set out on/finish his, has he been celibate this whole time because of the fact that anyone he falls for, anyone he would truly care about, would die in front of him?

Idk elves have a long life span and I'm sure Lieve'tel has had her trists with other elves. But it really is a socially awkward human man that gets her heart. Again they don't have to live their whole lives together, and they probably won't. They each are very important. They have very important positions.

But it must be nice to be able to part and say "until next time" and not really have to worry about how far next time is. Will it be ten years? They haven't aged a day. Will it be a hundred years? Oh, you've gotten slightly gray. Three hundred? My dear, I can see all your smiles I've missed in all these years in the lines on your face.

[according2thelore]

rereading "my teeth will only cut your lips, my dear" and like... it's so mommycore. especially since dean in that world ages and sam never will. oh my

(for those interested, the link to the fic is here!)

omg you're so right...my first mommyfic...

and honestly? i stand by that. dean would be full-tilt mothering. mommycore. mommymaxing (is that what the youth are yapping about now?)

cut for mommy mild nsft lol

do i think sam "whatever-the-magic-pill-is-i'll-take-it-too" winchester would turn dean no matter what (against his will if he has to) so they can be together forever? yes. do i still LOVE imagining forever young vampire sam and human dean? why yes.

not only can he provide for one of sam's most basic needs, he kind of HAS to, to keep sam safe and alive. sam needs him to live, and dean's body has become suddenly something more worthy and worth respect to himself. he kind of jokes if sam has any requests, and sam awkwardly asks if dean'll drink a different kind of beer because miller makes his blood taste weird and dean actually fucking does it.

and dare i say...there comes a point when dean is old enough to physically look like sam's father and god it makes him so happy and proud when they're sitting at a diner and dean gets complimented that he raised his son right and he's such a good kid.

like yes!!! that is his kid!!! that is his baby!!! thank you for noticing!!! sammy is such a good boy!!!

that is dean's ideal world: a sam that is pretty much invulnerable, who can't get sick or get hurt or die except in a very specific circumstance. i am positive they find a work-around for the sun-avoidance, so dean just gets sammy full-time who never gets old and needs him to provide his basic needs.

not to mention the way that vampirism kind of mimics breastfeeding in a way? hear me out! sam gets squirmy and agitated, and keeps looking at the thump of dean's pulse at his throat. sam doesn't have to breathe anymore, but automatically syncs his breathing to dean's. dean knows he's hungry because sam's broken their shared breathing rhythm as he inhales deeply, taking dean in. dean pulls the car off at the nearest exit and pulls them into the far corner of an abandoned gas station parking lot and pulls his shirt off, tilting his head back and pulling sam's head down in close, and sam is huffing loud breaths, quiet whimpers half-cut off as he sinks his teeth into the familiar notch of dean's neck, latching on. dean pets through sam's hair a low there ya go sammy there ya go, and sam hand's hands ball into fists against dean's skin, mind going fuzzy and hazy and mouth filled with deandeandean.

as dean gets older, he takes such satisfaction in seeing his callused, scarred hands next to sam's smooth, soft ones. he takes such pride in how well he's taken care of him, in how his body is a home for sam.

sam will nose in close, mewling and quiet when he gets hungry, gentle and apologetic as he crawls into dean's lap to feed from his neck. he'll get snarly and possessive if dean tries to pull him off, because this is as much sam's body as it is dean's, and dean shudders and presses sam closer because he loves being owned.

sam sometimes get aggravated and rough, and dean loves that just as much. sam's demanding hands kneading at the back of his neck to make the blood rush closer to the skin, growls and rumbling as he bites down on dean harder than usual and humps up into the cradle of dean's thighs, giving him everything, taking everything like it's owed to him.

and while dean kind of loves the way their appearances make their dynamic immediately respectable to others, dean feels weird about how he has pounds he can't pack away anymore while sam has an eternal six-pack and biceps as big as his head. dean kind of shrugs sam off when sam wants to take him apart nice and slow like c'mon you don't have to do that and sam is fucking baffled because this body has literally made him in all ways but genetic.

it raised him and sheltered him from nightmares and blocked stray knives and bullets and claws and is pumping sam's blood through his veins, the blood that keeps him alive and the blood they share.

dean has five favourite scars: two on the apex of his thighs, two on his wrists, and one at the base of his throat, the left side, above his heart. these are the scars that give sam life, that barely have time to heal over before sam is pawing gently at dean's knee, big eyes and unlined face and teeth already peeking over his lip because he knows dean will give in, dean will always give him what he needs when he needs it and will pet through his hair and coo as he does.

like that is MOMMY!!!! that is sam's MOMMY!!!!!!!

((also vampire demon blood sam would be INSANE because not only is it so much easier for him to get the blood, it's also kind of proving that he IS the monster he feared AND he's telling dean that his sustenance isn't enough anymore, that he CAN and WILL find satisfaction in another's body and YIKES!))

anyway, this ask was such a lovely little surprise, anon!!! thank you so much!! mwah! <3

-lizzy

[canonmisogynyvictimstournament]

PROPAGANDA

KATHERINA MINOLA (THE TAMING OF THE SHREW) (CW: Domestic Abuse)

1.) We had to read this for English my senior year. I got so mad at the way she’s treated. She’s the titular “shrew” of the play. She has to be married off before her younger sister can get married, because that makes sense.

Then the most dogshit man imaginable comes along, and everybody thinks they’re perfect. He literally gaslights her and denies her food and water.

Fuck Petruchio and Katherine Minola deserved better!

2.) Literally the whole play is about how she is so awful that the main guy needs to change her entire personality, which he does as a challenge not because he likes her, and then proceeds to her abuse her for the rest of the play. Yet, he is portrayed as the hero, not a villain and she is shown to have “improved” at the end. People will say, oh it’s open to interpretation, it can be played different ways, it’s satire, but i don’t find abuse funny and there is a distinct lack of commentary in the play to count as satire imo. Taming of the Shrew is a tragedy not a comedy, I will die on this hill. Kate deserves better!

3.) The title isn’t joking, ya’ll. She literally gets broken like a rebellious feral animal and it’s treated as a happy ending.

CORDELIA CHASE (BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER/ANGEL THE SERIES) (CW: Pregnancy)

1.) (downs an entire bottle of vodka and slams it back on the table) SO. CORDY. Cordy started off as a supporting character in Buffy the Vampire Slayer. At the start she was your typical high school mean girl character, but as the show went on we got to see more depth to her character: her insecurities, her courage, her capacity for incredible acts of kindness. Then after the third season she moved into the show’s spin off, Angel, where from the beginning she was basically the show’s secondary protagonist. Her and Angel were the two mainstays of the show’s main cast, she gets the most episodes centered on her out of all the characters aside from Angel (and yes, I’ve checked), and we really got to see her grow from a very shallow and self-centered and kind of mean person to a true hero who was prepared to give up any chance at a normal life to fight the good fight while still never losing the basic core of her character. There were some… questionable moments like the episode where she gets mystically pregnant with demon babies and things got a bit iffy like halfway through season 3 where the writers seemed to run out of ideas for what to do with her outside of sticking her in this romance drama/love triangle situation with the main character but overall, pretty good stuff right? THEN SEASON 4 HAPPENED. In season 4 she gets stripped of literally all agency and spends pretty much the entire season possessed by an evil higher power, and while possessed she sleeps with Angel’s teenage son (who BY THE WAY she had helped raise as a baby before he got speed-grown-up into a teenager it was a whole thing don’t worry about it) and gets pregnant with like. the physical manifestation of the higher power that’s possessing her. it’s about as bad and stupid as it sounds and also is like the third time cordy’s got mystically pregnant in this show and like the fourth mystical pregnancy storyline overall (you will be hearing more on that note in other submissions I’m so sorry). after giving birth she goes into a coma, in which she remains for the rest of season 4 and the first half of season 5. SPEAKING OF WHICH DON’T THINK SEASON 5 IS GETTING OFF SCOT FREE HERE. yeah so in season 5 the show just FULLY starts trying to erase cordy’s existence. she gets mentioned ONCE in the first episode and then never again until halfway through the season where she wakes up, helps out Angel for a bit and encourages him in his fight against evil, and then goes quietly into that good night and dies so it can be all sad and tragic. I’d call it the worst fridging of all time but even THAT feels generous because the whole point of fridging is killing off a female character so a man can be sad, and after Cordy dies basically no one’s even sad about it because the show immediately goes back to pretending she never existed. she is not mentioned ONCE in the two episodes after she dies. in the whole stretch of time between her death and the end of the season she gets mentioned exactly four times. again, I counted. anyway the fun twist to all of this is that all of this happened because the actress who played cordy got pregnant before season 4 and joss whedon was so pissed off about this affecting his plans for the show that he decided to completely fuck over her character and then fire her and write her out of the show. so cordy’s a victim of both writing AND real life misogyny!! good times!!

2.) OH SO MANY THINGS they menaced by giving her terrible hair cuts, making her seem like she’d get together with the guy she loves (and who loves her back) but instead she was killed and when she was brought back, she got possessed by an evil entity who used her body to give birth to itself. afterwards she was in a long coma and died. her character was so throughoutly assassinated

3.) She got demonically pregnant TWICE - there was this real sense of a womb/ability to get pregnant as like, a place for evil to get in. She got positioned as femme fatale and evil mother. The actress basically got fired for being pregnant, and when she agreed to come back for a single final episode she specifically said they could do anything but kill off the character. Guess what happened

[felikatze]

thinks abt my many half baked ISAT FE AU stuff again....

siffrin is a manakete that is all good night

uhhh act 5 and twohats spoilers below

joking but. also yes. i was thinking a lot abt what FE classes the cast would have recently so.

Mirabelle is a lord. HOWEVER. she gets to be a fancy lord who also gets staff access. Like Hoshido Noble. could you imagine dragging around a scrublord who only gets good on promo but they had heal utility the whole time. isn't that a dream. imagine if Roy could heal and then still rips in endgame

Odile is very obviously a Sage. Like cmon. If i had to pick any specific sage outfit it would in fact be Awakening sages. But the thought of Odile in the outfit of Engage sages is enough to kill people I think. Though the banana mage gba era would be hilarious on her.

The trifecta of magic is also a nice reflection of her being able to use all types of craft :) esp tellius mechanics are dope for that (and integrated into my silly isat emblems stuff). It could also be very thematically appropriate to make her an Omnyoji instead.

Isabeau just has massive axe bro energy. Yknow how fighters are stereotyped as stupid but then Lot FE6, generic axe bro ever, plays chess and does philosophy? Yeah. From a gameplay standpoint it would also make sense to put him in armor knight cuz he will Protect His Friends. Also he has the highest hp in the cast anyways. He would also have rally skills.

If i had to pick one guy to make a beast unit, it would be him also. Tiger isabeau.

Bonnie is the Transporter. They cannot fight. They cannot die. Bonnie is Merlinus. We are not letting the child on the battlefield. Give Bonnie a caravan and convoy access, you know they gotta.

Sif is. hm.

Like the obvious call is Thief, right? In games that have em, daggers are exclusive to thieves (unless you're fates, and have butlers and ninjas). Dagger classes can also debuff (with engage thieves poisoning, and fates daggers inflicting debuffs) which would be a nice niche. However Siffrin isn't actually a criminal.

From a story standpoint mercenary would be the most appropriate since they're not really here for any particular reason but just bcuz he happened to be in the country when the curse struck.

HOWEVER.... engage has given us a very tantalizing third option. Wolf Knight. They're not associated with crime. They are speedy, dodgy, and use daggers.

Siffrin gets a pet wolf. Do you see it.

TO ELABORATE ON THE MANAKETES THING.... So, if you've seen me talk abt my fucking, fe6 isat au, i cast Idunn as Siffrin. And the idea of someone forgetting their own species is really funny, and also kinda terrifying. And the only other person like you is the guy you have to kill.

Also I think creechur siffrin AUs are great. And dragons in FE are associated heavily with two things. a) going insane. b) amnesia (just look at corrin, and grima, and alear).

Also also dragons love to take naps. WHO ELSE LOVES TO TAKE NAPS?? That's right. Siffrin.

Oh yeah also. Dragon Loop. Wouldn't that be epic. AND. act 5 boss fight siffrin turning into a full dragon.

And the development possibilites. As siffrin learns about the island, also uncovering myths about dragons. And the new strength siffrin is able to master more and more of each loop being bcuz. well. dragon. and growing aware of the ways he's different from the others not just in the growing chasm as they veiw the party more and more as actors, but also the paranoia in physically becoming a monster.

Do you see my fucking vision, here.

SPEAKING OF ENGAGE.... i forgot who. but SOMEBODY. suggested. Emblem Loop. wrgrhr.

and i've thought abt how this would work. And i think it does work, if like... the island (and the divine dragons) all got forgotten because of the emblem's miracle. That somebody thought it was too dangerous and wanted to seal it away forever and used the power of the emblems to make them forgotten. And so Wish Craft would be the emblems' power instead, which only dragons have access to - supposedly. Hey, if a whole country tries out a prayer incantation, would it work?

And. and. this would be really easy to do by. replacing the silver coin with a ring. Siffrin just has this random ring they've had forever. So when Loop wishes to get out, they become the emblem they've been using. You get recursive timeloop questions - who was the emblem that granted Loop's wish in the first place? Was it another Siffrin? Somebody else altogether? Who knows. But isn't the asking really fun.

And like, I mean, Emblem Byleth already exists, we all know what "rerolling missed attacks to hit instead" is. Emblem Byleth is still rewinding time you just can't see that he is.

Do you see my vision. ISAT fire emblem engage AU.