#<- placeholder name till i give her a name

[edgymilkshakeart]

anthro gyaru reshiram girl i saw in a dream one time and made into an oc no name for her yet

[loserlvrss]

.. 𝐃𝐈𝐃 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆? ( 김.𝐉𝐒)

( 一月 ). ──you knew you'd never live up to his first but, it didn't hurt any less. 김종섭 &fem!rea. ⟡ drabble, angst warn. second love trope wc : 713HUN 노트 oh i hurt my own feelings with this one

You grew up learning to be grateful. You grew up never begging for more than what you got. You watched as storm clouds rained over your family, and as sunshine cascaded. You learned to press a smile to your face and fake it ‘till you make it through your entire life. Never overstepping and never crying about what you can’t have. 

You never felt like there was any substance to you, and eventually that made you stop feeling all together. 

Except, then he waltzed into your life. And, seemingly, he was the same; a hollow shell just roaming aimlessly. 

He mirrored your shattered expressions and morphed them into ones of confidentiality. He listened to your worries all night, and wiped the snot from under your nose as you cried and cried and cried. He brought bright hues of yellow and orange and pinks into your dull world. He brought you back, tearing down the walls you built up with his bare hands. 

But, you could never do the same for him no matter how hard you tried. You knew he’d take midnight walks to clear his head instead of confiding in you. You knew he’d lock the bathroom door, or wait until you left when the emotions got too much. You could hear the gentle pleas to whatever God was out there for the pain in his heart to go away. You loved him so dearly for fixing the unimaginable. 

But, how do you swallow the love that was never meant to be yours? 

“Seob,” You pressed your palm to the closed door, whispering out a gentle plea, “Please, let me in.” And you honestly didn’t know if you were asking for the door or his heart to unlock anymore. “Just…let me help you.” 

You couldn’t take the sniffles anymore. You were driving yourself crazy within the silence—it was louder than words could ever be. You couldn't compete with someone you knew so effortlessly made him smile. You didn’t want to ask if he still saw the person he couldn’t have in your eyes but, the question was looming. Half of his heart was yours but, he’d do anything to give it back, as he would for the clock to rewind. 

In every bitter moment you knew he saw her. The memories that never faded and he truthfully never wished would. 

You were just a placeholder, the fact that he’d run back if only she let him, weighing heavy on you. In every intimate confession he saved for another you felt pathetic, wishing for more than what you got. When you woke up next to him you wondered if you’d hear him mumble a different name or if you were just self-sabotaging. You wondered if through a half-asleep state you felt like her, and when fully awake he wished you did. 

He changed you. He made you envious, determined to break his habit—the drug you wanted to be. The drug she continued to be to him as he stared down at his phone, never having blocked the contact he used to look forward to hearing from. 

It broke your heart that you couldn’t mend his. It shattered you in pieces to rip apart your mind trying to find what was wrong with you. You bit your lip raw wondering how to satisfy the person who’s supposed to love you back. Lost sleep even. The light in your eyes was bright, but at the cost of his fading. 

He tried to put you above anything and everyone else. You knew he felt strongly towards you, doing whatever in his power to make you believe it. He made that clear through actions.

He was the storm and you were the spring flowers that followed. He was the setting sun and you were the golden hour. He was the charcoal and you were the fire. 

He sacrificed his peace of mind and he got out of the spotlight so that you could only shine. 

And, you loved him so much. But his love was only surface deep, reserved for another. 

Pretty words that didn’t match the sickly expression on his face anymore; you might’ve been his second but you'll never feel the same as his first. 

“Please, I love you.” 

And, he never did unlock it. 

© loserlvrss 2025. 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗲𝗱.

networks : @blossomnet @starlit-network @k-films @kstrucknet

taglist : @slytherinshua @mystarsohee @seomisaho @jihyokat @oc3anfloor @atzlordz @gyuwrites | fill out form to be added.

back to masterlist !

[nercocrafter]

So, as I'm doing the rewrite, I've come across the possibility of giving Aphmau a placeholder name until she's able to take on the name Aphmau. In my rewrite, I have Aphmau as a mute until she's able to understand and learn the Ru'aun languages. She, as a 'player' and Irene, understands/knows a FAR more ancient version of the languages. But for the current languages, she's unable to pronounce them. For the older versions of language, it's like seeing the word in your minds eye. You see the spelling of it, but you have no idea how to pronounce it. So she can see her name inscribed into her being like an echo [her player tag], but she's so new to the world she's not even sure how to begin to form the letters/or even vocalize them.

Because of this, when Vischer semi-adopts Aphmau and they develop a father-daughter relationship, he's going to gift her a name. The only problem is, I have no idea what to call her. I'm usually NOT fond of stories that replace the MCs name, but in rewrites like this, it makes sense (and it allows for so much fun and development). I REALLY like Analia, but Annette caught my eye as well. Aferdita is interesting because it means daybreak, and considering the themes of Phoenixs, I think you can see where I'm going with this. And Aisling is a dream or vision, and I think I'd be funny because for some reason, I looked at it and thought about how similar it feels to youngling. And with Vischer being a werewolf, he'd definitely see/feel that while her soul is old, she is for a lack of a better word, is fresh. New and untainted. Like a newborn pup, she is 'innocent' and needs guidance.

I made this poll to help me feel out what would be best for her. I'm UNSURE what I want for her name, and because I'm indecisive, this may take ages, but this will help weed out the choices till one sticks.

[dearlavender]

❀°•Protected•°❀

[Ghost x F! Child Reader] [PLATONIC/FAMILIAL]

Warnings: None!

Y/N's placeholder name: Althea [Feel free to change it as you read]

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇　

Gently bouncing on the balls of her feet, the young girl kept her hands on the straps of her school bag while her eyes continued to scan the area around her. She was supposed to meet her father after school due to his team arriving back in the country after a three-month operation.

The smile on her lips grew wider as sparkles glimmered in her eyes once she spotted a familiar figure walking out of the base.

There was no doubt in her mind that it was him, the bulky intimidating build and the skull mask on his face just confirmed it. Hell, he still even had his gear on as well.

"You're back in one piece! " She stated as she jogged over to him, lifting her head as he towered over her by miles. His bright baby blue eyes immediately looked at her once she got into his field of view. "I missed you, Ghost! "

They weren't related by blood or anything, but he had taken her in when she was around four. Just to keep her out of the system...

But, after a few months, he decided to keep her around indefinitely. Quietly vowing to himself to give her a better life than what he got.

"Missed ya too, poppet. " His voice came out gruff as he suddenly scooped her up, keeping her close to his body as she wrapped her arms and legs around him in a hug. He was only actually affectionate like this when he was coming back from a long operation, relieved to just see her once again.

"School doesn't end for another hour, how're you here? " He asked, placing her back onto the ground as one of her hands sneakily placed itself into his larger one.

"Ehe... " She let out a noise as she scratched her cheek with a fingernail, avoiding his gaze.

"Bloody hell.. "

*****

"Ghost? Is everything okay? " The girl, Althea, mumbled as she rubbed one of her eyes while slowly knocking on the door in front of her. When she was given no answer her sluggish state became much more awake as she carefully placed a hand on the doorknob and opened it.

"Simon? " She called out as she took a step into the darkened bedroom, immediately taking notice of the older man who was sitting up in the bed. Hunched over while holding his face in his hands.

Deciding to keep her gaze away from his unmasked face, showing off his dirty blonde hair, instead, she turned her attention to the knocked-over lamp on the floor and the loaded gun on the bedside table.

"Are they happening again? " She asked as she picked up the heavy lighting and put it back in its place, her attention never leaving the firearm. She was trying to decide whether she should put it back in the drawer or leave it alone.

Due to her young age, he never really disclosed what went on during his childhood... With the monster that he called his father. Hell, it took till she was seven till he finally kept his mask off around her in their flat.

But she could just tell that it was about that. Every so often, he'd wake up in the middle of the night because of reoccurring nightmares.

" 'm fine, you don't gotta worry bout me poppet. " He muttered, bringing his hands down from his face, revealing the scars that littered his flesh. Letting his body fall back against the mattress he was sitting on. Being doted on and cared for was never really his style so despite everything, he still had 'walls' up around himself to keep everything out.

"You're not fine. " Althea replied as she placed her hands on her hips, furrowing her eyebrows together as she looked at him. She stood there for a couple of seconds before jogging out of the room and back to her bedroom.

Simon watched as he heard shuffling around and things hitting the floor before the noises of feet stomping filled the quiet air.

"Here, this makes me feel better when I'm scared. " The eight-year-old spoke as she slowly but surely clambered onto his bed, sitting on the edge with a stuffed rabbit plush in her arms. "And so, I bestow him onto you. For however long you need him! "

"I ain't scared o' nothing. " He muttered under his breath as he watched her put the stuffed animal into one of his arms without protest.

"Yeah yeah, Mister Soldier. Just put all your bad dreams into this and I'll keep watch. " She lightly teased before pushing herself off the mattress, her kind smile never leaving her lips.

And later that morning, Ghost found her asleep outside of his bedroom door. Slumped over on a chair with a blanket and a broom in her little arms. God knows how long she was out there.

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇　

Sorry if this isn't the greatest! I wrote it on a whim with no real planning out 😅

[e1dritchqueer]

Callisto and Io infodump

Okay okay okay okay, I feel like I need to talk about Io and Callisto from last Beam Saber session or else I'm gonna fucking combust jesus fucking christ AAA

Callisto: My player character. She's an Ascencian pilot who has trapped under the facade of a dead and legendary pilot. The previous pilot, Argyre died and Callisto, a city rat and a conscript, someone who, according to Ascencian fascist rhetoric, should by no means be able to pilot a mech somehow inexplicably bonded with it. She's been forced to become the pilot known as Wraith (Argyre's callsign) and to pilot its fearsome mech, The Wraith of Deimos (We'll refer to it as Deimos). Only recently has Callisto escaped the hold of the Ascencians and now, with Deimos, find herself as a part of a roving mercenary band. Now, while she was imprisoned under the Ascencians, she was forced to play the role of Argyre, under Ascencian rhetoric, Argyre was not dead. And internally, Callisto was only a placeholder till they could find a "proper" Pilot to officially assume the role of the Wraith. No one knew about Callisto, Argyre's death, or the fact Callisto was the Wraith now. And those that did got killed (Illia's old crew). Even free from the Ascencians, Callisto tries to keep a low profile, not knowing how to tell everyone that she didn't somehow steal Deimos, she was (and is) its pilot.

Callisto's wants in this game were simple. Callisto more than anything wants to run. She wants to escape the war and leave, an impossible goal that she has reached for her entire life.

Callisto and Deimos' relationship has been an interesting one. They do not know why they are bonded only that they are. They are the two-become-one known as Wraith. Each is afraid of the other but that fear has transformed into a fearful intimacy. Callisto saw the Deimos as just another part of The Wraith's constricting identity but has since realized that Deimos is just as restrained as her.

Their bond, like all bonds with what's known as "Awakened Frames" (Culturally called Leviathans where Callisto comes from) (awakened frames are essentially like the Gundam/EVAs of this setting. They are terrifying.) allows them to do something impossible. In their case, it is capable of opening a "door" into a mysterious pocket dimension known as The Red. It is something old, something Callisto both sees danger and safety in, something she is trying to understand. (also this is why red is like... a massive motif for callisto). Argyre was also capable of the very same power. While Callisto uses The Red to run, Argyre used The Red as a weapon.

Cool now you're caught up to speed on my beloved wet dog of a girl and her it/its trans girl of a mech.

Now, last session, which you can get a vibe of from my liveblog of it, the party went to a ball for the "season 1 finale" of the Beam Saber campaign. Callisto was asked to dance by a girl named Io (JOVIAN MOON MOTIF). It was lovely. They both got to dance unrestrained from the expectations and roles of war forced upon them, simply enjoying each other as each other and getting to cherish that. Stepping out of the ballroom and onto a balcony, they get closer, physically and emotionally. talking bit about their life. They both feel like dogs in an unending war, tired of losing people in the war, and wanting to escape it all. They feel a tenderness and closeness with each other. It's lovely. They're glad, that even in the midst of this terrible war, they have met each other, and through that feel a bit of solace. It feels like Io is going to move in to kiss Callisto, but before that, Io gives her an offer. "Come escape with me Callisto. We can leave the ring. Leave the war. We can be at peace.

I just need to finish this one job.

I just need to kill the Wraith

I checked the frame registry. It's here. I don't know where the pilot, is, I haven't seen him, but if I can just destroy that terrible machine I'll be at peace. We can escape together.

Callisto is in shock, she's stumbling over words, a jumble of "W-what do you mean?"s and "H-huh?"s.

"I can't be at peace while the Wraith is still living... It killed my mentor. Took one of the few people I cared about. I just need to destroy it... Then... Then I can escape with you... We could leave this war for good"

Callisto wants to take that offer. She so desperately wants to leave this war. Abandon it all and everyone. But she can't. Not at that cost. A younger Callisto would have taken that chance in a heartbeat, a Callisto utterly terrified of Deimos. But Callisto, though still terrified of her Leviathan, is too connected to Deimos for her to abandon it anymore. She didn't realize this till this moment, but she cares too much about Deimos to allow it to be harmed.

She steps back as Io tries to lean in closer. "I-im sorry I-i think I really have to go..."

Callisto beings to stumble her way from the balcony, reaching her hand out to the ballroom door "I'm sorry... I-Im just not the girl you're looking for". The doorway opens. But it's not the ballroom door that opens.

The last thing Callisto sees is Io's dawning face of horror as she watches Callisto fall into The Red.

The Wraith's red.

The thing is, Callisto was wrong, she was the right girl... Just for all the wrong reasons....

[blucassiopeia]

so in Dangerous Oikawa has to give a. massive apology to reader BUT BUT BUT (unless i misunderstood) Iwaizumi owes an apology too to readers.

it wasn’t really mentioned in the fic if iwaizumi kept in touch with oikawa after the bistro incident…and as far as it was revealed he knew little to nothing about reader and her relationship with oikawa. IF SO then he had no right in lowkey gaslighting oikawa in that phone call saying he could not drop his (their) dream just for reader and then saying she was just a Ran’s placeholder AS if oikawa could/should never move on from Ran - unconsciously he was already movin on….

also i don’t recall, in the bistro incident who (if osamu or Ran’s man) in the end told oikawa to stay away from ran (forever i suppose)…then during the wedding day the gc was full of pictures of them being happy and oikawa left the gc BUT Osamu added him again 🥴🥴 what’s with this toxicity

he fucked up, no one can deny it, BUT it takes two to have an affair (if that’s what really happened) unless the cheater lies about their single status. Let’s not forget that in the end Ran told oikawa that she would always choose her boyfriend (Ran’s plushie) - as a lover. What was Oikawa supposed to do? Yes, he promised the boyfriend he was staying till he came back (from i dont even know where he went) BUT in my own opinion a good friend understands that sometimes (right or wrong) we have to prioritise ourselves and not someone else’s well being (Ran’s in this case).

cant wait to know the boyfriends name to yell at him a big fat F.O bc if he and ran didn’t have a complicated relationship then im pretty sure many thing could have been prevented. 😬

so far i’ve yet too see the boys held Ran accountable for her mistakes (?) - i.e the affair - i mean only two people went to argentina but my gut feeling is telling me that everyone in the gc thought oikawa was the -only one - at fault (whether they knew about the affair or not)

also this might be an unpopular opinion but all the boys seems to be a bit too (over)protective of Ran’s well being (we know she had her problems growing up but who didn’t) to the point where they not just protect but coddle her too…like from their point of view she cant do no wrongs and her happiness comes always first (it doesn’t matter if they -the boys - are breaking bc they are in love with her and they don’t have a chance).

since they will never have Ran romantically (oikawa’s story proves it) they will do everything to make her happy/life easier being at her beck and call and at the same time as they grow up and life goes on they meet new people (readers from the different spin offs) they will not only prevent themselves to move on and be actually happy but, at the same time, hurt the various readers, some more than others (ie kuroo’s spin off). ngl this is kinda a toxic behaviour (from the boys pov) 🫣

sooner or later they will understand/realise that their happiness can be linked to someone else and maybe what they really needed to move on was time and space (away from Ran). A clear example (so far) is kuroo’s story, it took him literally years to realise (his) reader was the one for him and also to actually see that he was already in love with her but he always dismissed those feelings bc he was so present and active in Ran and the twins lives everyone would think he was the actual father 🤔🥴 …and the way kuroo’s realisation was worded sounded like he was too late?

Semi’s story is similar, but completely different at the same time compared to kuroo’s (referring to the time skip when they are no longer uni students but working adults). Semi’s reader, the singer, was a his friend and her presence was sort of a constant reminder that he should stop being delusional about Ran since she was happy with a family. He might not had space (away from Ran) but the singer was there with him when he babysat the twins, they even argued about it.

While Kuroo’s delusions where strong enough not even kenma could do much about it. at a certain point he wasn’t even taking care of himself but it was reader silently doing it. Ran’s twins were sick, he was rushing to them, it was their birthday, he couldn’t miss it. someone implied he might be one of the godfathers but still…he was doing what a father is supposed to do/not miss. Where the heck was Ran’s husband in all of this? In the end readers words (when she talked with kenma) were true: if kuroo doesn’t take care of him (and his heart) who’s gonna do it? if reader wasn’t silently there kuroo might have collapsed bc of exhaustion between his workplace and Ran’s house 🫡🫡 Kuroo’s missing an outsider’s pov (Semi’s reader) who could tell him what is he living for? if Ran’s and the twins’ well being is his own purpose of life then maybe he should rethink about it. What would Ran think if she finds out he’s devoting (not her finding about he being in love with her but just as a friend) his life to her family. I don’t think she would be happy

Ngl as much as i want to see all the spin off boys be happy with their respective readers i wouldn’t mind see kuroo suffer after the realisation he lost his true love of his life (reader). Her falling for someone else would be a deja vu BUT her dying *chef’s kiss* You can fix many things but not prevent someone’s death 😬

one last thing: in the main story is there gonna be a chapter where Ran kind of realise she was the reason (unconsciously obliviously) some of the boys where keeping potential love interest at an arm’s length/not wanting anyone in their lives bc of her?

sorry for the long ask

okay i'll loosen a little to explain further the issues presented aaaand i would like you to know anon that i appreciate these kind of asks because some people also needs to ask this 🥺🥺 thank you for collating it for you and for them 🥺🥺 so okay..

yep, and Oikawa and Iwaizumi would be there to apologize.. for maybe (2 weeks for iwa 3 months for Tooru ANDDD ssh) they'll be with someone else in here andー🙈 eitherway, Tooru and Ran would still have a VERY complicated "interaction" (i wont say relationship), but she, too, will apologize.

hajime is aware of all that's happening to tooru in san juan and he didn't bat an eye on everything tooru shares day by day, and he updates him with SOMETHING I CAN'T SAY. All I can say is that he has every right to gaslight tooru in that phone call because tooru himself is confused and iwacchan intended to make him realize his feelings (he intends to say that tooru should take yn to his world if he really loves her, prove to iwacchan he has moved on, but tooru can't even say anything at that moment other than his attempt to drop their dreams for her, that's where they both fucked up)

it was ran's plushie that said tooru should stay away from Ran (didn't say forever), i will say it here coz ill not be stating this in the other chap so.. tooru previously left the chat consequently when he left Japan, Kei added him back tho and that was enough for the others to understand a little of what's happening (ran not batting an eye on that too, she doesn't care). and osamu is not toxic in that scene i swearrrr, he knows kei's intentions on adding tooru back, but yes they are teasing tooru in a very savage way i believe he deserves.

yep, tooru fucked up bigtime but i dont remember saying Ran had an affair with him or something............. it's safe to say that Ran's plushie intended to leave Ran on tooru's care as a friend AND THAT'S ALL THAT I CAN SAY, let's just say tooru made a really REALLY big mistake that destroyed Ran and i think everyone who's close to them (especially Ran's plushie).

and no, you can't yell at him 🥺🥺 im not revealing his name but really, you would understand why they have a complicated relationship. in the fic, you would first see Ran's POV, i mean the entire first half of the fic is hers, then 2 POVs of Ran's plushie explaining the events he cant say to Ran (but he did say to the boys) AAAAAAHHH SSSSHHー

i mentioned that Ran, Tadashi and Kei are in levels of density other people can't reach (in Kageyama's) but yep, it's not an excuse but she really doesn't know anything else toottoot i think Osamu's spinoff would relieve your issue on this coz it will tackle Ran's density (but still lowkey) but it will show you another side of Ran. AND they are protective of Ran, especially the Karasuno ones, because they know something others don't, and there are groups within the "volleyball idiots GC" that knows other "issues of Ran they can't tell anyone about". let's say there are 3 groups of that, one being lowkey mentioned on other fics i wont tell.

yeah, they are loving Ran in a toxic behavior im not gonna deny it but i think that tooru is just the hard-smacked lover, tetsu is well yeah YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND KUROO TETSUROU LATER IN THE FIC and add "3 someones" there, because they have the same issue.

and 🥺 we're tackling my Semi 🥺 but i can't say anything about hiiim, and yea, he's clearly different with the others. and i can't say it's a "delusion" for tetsu. all i can say to explain tetsu is that "Ran's plushie gave him something he can't afford to lose". and where is "Ran's plushie" in all of this.. i cant sayyyyyyy 💔 but tetsu devoting his everything to Ran has some sort of explanation in the fic, don'cha'worry. AND HEYYY did i say that kuroo's yn is some sort of a game changer (but for the 2nd fic). and believe me, Ran knows what's happening to whom, you'll understand her more soooon.

and omg, kuroo's yn dyingggg, I LAUGHED SO HARD. 👀👀👀 you might wanna read that portion again and you'll know when you know, then pm me if you have a hunch.

in a chapter, Ran will realize everything after she loses something really big. someone will sit and talk with her about these things and that will lead to her apologizing to tooru's yn, and to the others as well, but i dont think she's accounted to apologize butーAH YOU'LL KNOW YOU WILL KNOW I SWEAR. but you will see something like this (but lowkey) in Osamu's soon enough.

i love youu, you're nicely knitting the spinoffs 🥺

[acc-writing]

1st Feb, 2023.

I totally forgot to post this. Actually, I totally forgot that I need to write and sat to write only at 23:30. LOL. Silly me. I managed to get in some 500 words before the day ended but this post got delayed to next day. Here is 1st Jan's writing proof!

Shoe explained how her friend was stalked everywhere by this guy and she was so scared that now she refuses to come to school at all.

‘Teacher! This is our tenth standard. The Board year! If we did not perform well, we cannot get into good colleges. And if we missed the school, not only we would not get 75% attendance which is compulsory to appear for the exams but also not get good marks in those exams. This as.... sorry…. This fellow would be the reason behind my friend’s future getting ruined. What else was I supposed to do?’

P.S. Shoe is the name I gave my character coz I have yet to find a right name for her. I know its silly but what to do. Miss Shoe is the nickname Hero gives her, so I used Shoe as the placeholder for her name till I could think of a right one.

[aellynera]

Hi love! Can you do a Oscar Isaac x reader where they do the buzzfeed video reading thirst tweets and he gets jealous of the tweets? Thank you so much, I love your page. ❤️

Hello lovely Nonnie! I’m sorry this took so long, but I finally got super inspired to finish it. It’s not Oscar Isaac per se (I don’t do RPF) but I thought about it a bit and I was like...but I will do a Llewyn AU. So that’s what I did, and here it is, and I hope you and whoever else reads it, enjoys it! (note: most of the tweets came from various Thirst Tweet videos on YouTube, but there are a couple I just made up.)

I Want Llewyn Davis to Blank Me in the Blank (Llewyn Davis x F!Reader, Modern AU)

Word Count: 1300(ish)

Warnings: Some language, sexual references but nothing graphic or explicit just suggestive, floof.

- Llewyn isn’t sure what a BuzzFeed is, and to be honest, he’s not even sure what the hell a thirst tweet is. 

- You’re always teasing him that, if the world suddenly loses all technology tomorrow and the internet and social media disappear, he’ll be the only one who will still be able to function, and he’ll probably be a lot happier.

- You’re not wrong.

- He hates social media. Doesn’t understand what the point is really, why so many people are obsessed with it. Yeah, he technically has official accounts on all the major platforms, mainly because you insisted and set them up. They’re just placeholders and he never uses them.

- The only reason he’s even here to do this media gig is because you asked, all wide puppy-dog eyes and gnawed-on bottom lip, and he knows that you know he can’t say no to that.

- Not that he ever really wants to say no to you, but sometimes...

- Now he’s almost one hundred percent certain he regrets it.

- You’ve tried explaining the concept to him, probably like twenty-some times, and you’re trying again now, but as you lead him into the studio it pretty much goes in one ear and out the other.

- People don’t know you’re together, so he’s annoyed by that on top of everything else, because he can’t call you any of the usual pet names that roll off his tongue like melted butter.

- No angel. No baby. No sweetheart. It fucking sucks.

- "It’s not a serious thing, Llewyn. Just...fake it till you make it. Make jokes about it, it’ll be fine,” you tell him.

- You sit side by side at a little table, a couple feet apart, and a production assistant put a little metal bucket in front of each of you.

- Llewyn gives you a weird look. You just shake your head and smile this cute little smile that he does his level best to ignore because, well, you’re in public and nobody knows.

- Then the tweets come out of the buckets.

- Things I requite in a man: five nine, pisces, grammy nominated, llewyn davis. That’s all i ever need.

- Why is Llewyn Davis so attractive? He’s like 30 years older than me and I’m a lesbian but he still gets me hot and bothered.

- I cannot believe Llewyn Davis invented being sexy.

- Llewyn Davis got thicc lips and thicc hips

- I want Llewyn Davis to be my daddy but not in the fatherly kind of way.

- There’s a lot more, but honestly, they all sort of blend together.

- He manages to laugh them off and make some clever comments but he shoots you a look that’s part confusion, part disdain, and really annoyed. You just shrug.

- But then the tweets start coming out of your bucket, and Llewyn’s brain instantly regains its laser-focus.

- First, because everyone calls you by your online handle, which drives the nail further into Llewyn’s coffin because of his inability to actually call you cute names night now.

- Secondly, who do these assholes think they are, talking about his girl like this?

- Hello? Maker? Can we talk about how you put the heavens in AngelEyes’s eyes, because it’s starting to cause some serious problems over here. Kthx.

- I want to lick cherry-flavored jello off AngelEyes fingers, why does life have to be so unfair?

- Sit on my face and suffocate me, AngelEyes.

- AngelEyes’s boobs are a gift from whatever deity you choose to believe in, and if you’re an atheist, well, then more tits for me.

- I’m pretty sure AngelEyes could get all my children out of me, and I’m willing to take that challenge.

- Llewyn’s kind of tuned out, trying not to pay any attention to all the dirty things the world wants to do to you, but his head finally snaps up and his arm does too and his little metal bucket goes crashing to the floor.

- You (and everyone else in the studio) just stare at him.

- “Could I...” he clears his throat, “could I speak to you, for just a minute? Like, out in the hall?”

- “Okay?” you say slowly, but stand up and head towards the door, with him right behind you.

- The door barely has a change to swing shut behind you before Llewyn is on you, frantically pressing his lips to yours in a soul-sucking kiss.

- “Llewyn, what are you doing?” you hiss when you finally break away for air.

- It took quite a few minutes before you absolutely needed that break and you’re fairly certain people are going to come looking for you any second because you have to be taking a lot longer to “talk” than Llewyn implied.

- “Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to sit there and pretend all those tweets are okay”

- He’s pressing you against the wall and you can’t help the slightly impish smile that comes to your face. “I have a pretty good idea.”

- Llewyn glares through narrowed eyes. “This isn’t funny, AngelEyes.”

- “I was listening to all the ones people said about you too. Don’t get so worked up, Llewyn, it’s all in good fun.”

- Llewyn snorts.

- “Baby, are you...jealous?” You raise a brow at him.

- “I have half a mind to just take you up against this wall, right now.”

- “You’re jealous.”

- His mouth is suddenly a breath away from yours again, and he murmurs, “I just want people to know that you’re mine. And to know that I’m yours. And to never read a single thirst tweet ever again in my entire life,” before his desperate lips are back on yours.

- This time, he pulls out of the kiss first and you rest your head on his shoulder and try to catch your breath again.

- He’s checking something on his phone - replying to a text from his manager Snap or his sister, maybe, you’re only vaguely aware that he’s actually on his phone at all.

- But then you feel your own phone vibrate in your pocket.

- You pull it out and immediately almost drop it.

- “Llewyn. You...you didn’t.”

- Llewyn looks at you with a completely innocent face. He slides his phone back in his pocket and hooks a thumb towards the door. “I don’t know what you mean, sweetheart. Come on, we should probably get back in there before they send a search party.”

- You barely have time to process the notification that Llewyn Davis (@ folksingerwithacatofficial) has made his first tweet! Check it out! and even less time to actually read it before Llewyn disappears through the door and you have to follow.

- But it there was a picture - you didn’t even know Llewyn knew how to do that. And if he had an extra minute, he’d be inordinately proud of himself.

- It’s from a friend’s rooftop party a couple weeks ago. You’re behind him with your arms around his shoulders, kissing his cheek, and he has his eyes closed and a happy, content little smile on his face.

- There’s no way anyone’s going to look at it and be like, ‘oh they’re just friends.’ But the caption definitely clears it up.

- Never been happier than I am w/AngelEyes by my side. Aren’t enough words to say how much I love you, baby. Maybe I’ll just write you a song or ten.

- You head back into the studio, about to shove your phone back in your pocket, your face burning hotter than the sun, but it vibrates again and you see the corners of Llewyn lips turn up, even though he’s pointedly not looking at you.

- There’s another tweet.

- Now go get some water y’all and stop talking about my girlfriend’s tits. At least give her ass the credit it deserves too.

- Llewyn pretends not to notice when, five minutes later, everyone’s phones and laptops and tablets start blowing up with notifications and reactions. He just pulls you into his lap and kisses you softly on the cheek.

Everything Taglist: @anetteaneta @autumnleaves1991-blog @be-the-spark-flyboy @damerondjarin @deeandbobbymcgee @huxdameron @iflostreturntobudcooper @itspdameronthings @jitterbugs927 @leto-duke @littlebopper96 @reysflyboy @rosemarysbaby13 @spider-starry @veuliee @waatermelon-sugaar @woakiees @writefightandflightclub @yourbucky084

Llewyn Taglist: @santiagogarcia

>>join my taglist here<<

[frombeyondtheblackhole]

Hermit DSMP Swap AU: Part 12.5

[TW // cannon death flashbacks, dissociation]

Pearl sat cross legged on the floor of her new boat house. She originally built it near Grian’s house but moved it to on top of Impulse's as a joke. Impulse liked it so much that he suggested they just share a base together so she just ended up leaving it that way. Pearl heard the murmur of voices downstairs, Impulse was entertaining some of the other hermits. She could hear Doc’s deep rumbling voice through the floorboards, and the mumbling monotone of several other hermits she couldn’t place. She considered going downstairs to join them but she didn’t really feel like socializing. 

Pearl looked down at one of her dogs lying lazily on her back panting up at her. She smiled softly and gave her some absent minded tummy rubs. Genesis had really loved this dog. She really needed to give her a name. She looked back at the papers scattered across the floor in front of her and picked up a diagram from the pile. They were terraforming plans she and Scar had worked up. They were going to make the refugee camp look amazing, adding nicer paths and trees and bushes and little lamp posts and benches. The camp was really starting to look more like a permanent home then a temporary placeholder but they were hermits, they got restless if they didn’t have a project to work on. Besides, they were just houses, Pearl was starting to think all this fighting wasn’t worth it. 

A tapping sounded at the window and Pearl looked up. Grian clung to the windowsill, he gave the window another tap and waved. Pearl’s brow knitted in confusion and went over to the window opening it. A cool breeze followed as Grian climbed in. 

“Grian? What are you doing at my window?” 

“I wanted to ask you something,” He said, looking absently around the room.

“No, I mean, why didn’t you use the door?” Pearl said, even though she already knew it was a pointless question. Grian rarely had an explanation for the things he did aside from, he wanted to. To her surprise he actually responded with somewhat of an answer.

“Everyone’s downstairs, I didn’t want to bother them.” He shrugged.

Pearl nodded. She understood that to mean he didn’t want to be bothered by them. He had been away for a long time but she still felt like she could read him pretty well. Sometimes too well if she was being honest, “You said you wanted to ask me something.”

“Yeah, do you mind if I crash here for a bit. Schlatt’s kind of trashed my place and I’m in desperate need of a nap.”

“Of course, stay as long as you need. You can use my bed for now, I’ll get you a spare later,” She said, gathering up the papers from the floor.

“Thank’s” grian muttered flopping face first onto Pearl's bed, his wings spreading over him like a blanket. Pearl noticed how the feathers were almost all completely purple like the scars that now marked her face and hands. 

“I’ll be downstairs if you need me.”

“Don’t leave on my account,” Grian muttered, already half asleep.

“Nah,” Pearl shrugged. “I need to meet up with Scar to go over plans.” 

“Mmm-kay,” Grian trailed off sleepily and Pearl quietly closed the door behind her and headed down the stairs. 

“I'm just saying, If we just sit around doing nothing we’ll keep disappearing till we're outnumbered.” Impulse was saying as Pearl entered the kitchen. Impulse Scar and Keralis sat at the kitchen table while Doc paced around the kitchen. Gem sat on the counter with a steaming mug of something and Bdubs was perched on top of a chest eating cookies directly from the jar.

“Oh, hey there Pearl, come join us,” Impulse said, waving her over. 

“We have tea!” Gem said, holding up her mug and pointing to a pot on the counter. 

“Nah, I'm good,” Peal said, holding up a hand. 

“Anyway, like I was saying,” Impulse continued, “We need to do something. Our last plan almost worked-”

“I died,” Pearl interrupted, “I don’t really call that a success.”

Doc shrugged “That was more of a fluke. We all died a lot in that battle.”

“You died more than once.” Scar pointed out

“It is a bit strange that one stuck when none of the others did,” Impulse added, “But it probably had to do with the void messing with respawn. If we avoid the boatem pit we should be fine.” 

“I guess,” Pearl muttered, rubbing her arm, her fingers brushing across her scars. Her scars were relatively new, they still ached. She had died to the void before and it had never felt like that; like cold fingers tearing her apart from the inside out. 

“What we need is a clear goal, to define what we’re trying to get out of all of this. Only then will we be able to determine the safest way to achieve that goal,” Gem said.

“I mean isn’t it obvious,” Scar said “We want Boatem back.” Impulse nodded in agreement.

“That’s one goal,” Gem said, “but I’m more in this to get False and Ren back.”

“And Tango,” Bdubs chimed in.

“Zactly,” Keralis added.

“But aren't Grian, Joe and X working on that?” Pearl said. 

Doc scowled, “Dere doing dere best but, if we wan’t to get to the bottom of this we need to find out how dey’re doing the snatching.” 

“Wait, so you’re saying you think the DSMPer’s are responsible for the swaps?” Pearl said.

“Basically.” Doc shrugged.

“That doesn't make sense, we spent several weeks with them and none of them would do something like that.” Pearl looked at Impulse and Scar hoping for back up but they both just looked regretfully at her.

“Pearl- We trusted them too but they’ve shown that we misjudged them. They attacked us and took Boatem for seemingly no reason.” Impulse said.

“It’s not your fault,” Scar reassured “But Impulse is right, they could be capable of anything.”

Pearl bit her lip.

Doc spoke up, “My theory is dat dey are using hacking, possibly a combination of hacking and glitching. If we can find evidence of dis den I might be able to reverse engineer what dey're doing and get everyone back.”

Gem placed her mug down carefully next to her and sat up a bit straighter, “We could do a series of stealth missions, search the houses to figure out where they’re living and what they changed. Figure out where they’re keeping their resources and how they’re distributing them. We can have people keep watch over the town from a distance and track their movements. We know the swaps occur almost exactly a week apart, if we can figure out where everyone is and what they’re doing at that time we might be able to figure out how and if they are doing it.” Gem said, giving Pearl a reassuring glance. 

Pearl opened her mouth to say something but stopped. The group continued to talk, detailing plans and delegating tasks but Pearl couldn’t help shake the feeling that this all was going to end horribly. That someone was going to get hurt. They didn’t understand what death was like and how unpredictable it was. How could they know that the next time they died it wasn’t going to be their last. And what about the DSMPer’s, did they really want to be responsible for their deaths? And what about Genesis? What if she ended up getting hurt by all of this. Foolish had said children were more likely to perma-die. What if a stray explosion took her life? Even if she could respawn after, no one should have to experience that, especially a new player that had been thrown into the middle of all this without any say of their own.

“-When we finally decide to make a move,” Doc was saying.

 Pearl snapped out of her own thoughts and looked up. She looked at Scar “Hey, I know I said I would go over the terraforming plans with you today but I just remembered, I have something else I need to do,” She said handing the papers to Scar, “You can take a look though, we can just wing it when I get back,”

“No problem,” Scar chimed, taking the diagrams “Good luck with your thing,” He added, trying to wave with his arms now full. Pearl gave him a tight smile before heading out the door. Genesis wasn’t going to die to this stupid war if she had anything to say about it.  

—

Foolish picked up Genesis and blanched her on his hip. She grabbed onto the fabric of his headdress for stability, her other hand occupied as she sucked on her thumb. Foolish was tired, his duel jewel toned eyes dulled with fatigue. He’d spent several days without rest helping Punz prepare for their plan; Get Pearl to tell them how they were brought here and then how to send them back… or in his case how to get the rest of his family out.

Foolish eyed the Boatem pole as he passed, making sure to keep his distance from the pit beneath it. Even with the fence around it he didn’t trust it. He didn’t want to go near it and he didn’t want Genesis near it either. The thought of the void being exposed to the sky felt wrong. The very existence of the void felt like an anathema. His head hurt and his right eye felt cold, like an ice cube had been placed in the socket. He shuddered at the memory of the cold void filling his head, spreading and consuming him from the inside out. His scar blackened hands held Genasis a little tighter and she rested her chin on his shoulder. It was comforting. Foolish smiled weakly and reminded himself he was alright. He took a deep breath. He was here with his daughter in the sunlight. 

He stopped in front of Skeppy’s house, a complete eyesore of a diamond block cube. He wondered what possessed Skeppy to build such a monstrosity… not that he was surprised. He could hear the murmur of voices inside. He knocked on the door. 

It went quiet on the other side.  

No response.

He knocked again a little more aggressively “I know you’re in there, I heard you talking.”

There was some more muttering on the other side and then Skeppy opened the door. “What do you want?” he huffed. Foolish looked past him. George sat at a table and- was that a map? What were those idiots' planning? Actually it didn’t matter. Foolish shook his head.

“I need you to watch Genesis for me while I go with Punz and Ponk on the mission.” 

Genesis craned her neck to look inside the house and seeing George she started squirming to be let down, making little urgent noises around her thumb. Foolish put her down and she squeezed her way past Skeppy into the house and over to the table. Going up on tiptoes and popping her tumb out of her mouth she pointed at the map “What’s that?” She asked. George blinked at her. 

“A map?” he said.

Skeppy huffed “No, I’m busy.” He said, crossing his arms. “You aren't the only one around here with things to do.”      

Foolish rolled his eyes “Riiight, what exactly are you doing that is so important anyway?”

“None of your business,” He said “Now get your kid out of my house,” Genesis crawled under the table with a cookie. “Wait? Where did she get that?” Skeppy looked at George who shrugged with a guilty look on his face as he tried to push the empty plate of cookie crumbs out of Skeppies line of view. 

“Don’t feed the children! She’ll get attached and then we won’t be able to get rid of her!” 

“She’s my daughter, not a duck…” Foolish scowled disapprovingly. “Just babysit her for three hours, alright. I’ll pay you a diamond block again.”

Skeppy raised his brows “Two blocks.”

“Sure.”

Skeppy pursed his lips, watching as Genesis climbed up into George's lap. “Ok, deal.”

“Thanks, she’s a good kid and shouldn’t give you any trouble. Besides, I’m sure she’s easier to care for than Sapnap was. I can’t imagine how you handled a baby that could spontaneously burst into flames.”

“It helps that I’m fireproof.” Skeppy shrugged.

“Anyway, she shouldn’t be any problem. It’s almost her nap time so just make sure to put her to bed and stay nearby in case she needs you.” Foolish explained, “Feel free to make yourself comfortable in my house while you're watching her… your place doesn't really look very- child friendly,” He said looking around the interior. There was a bed with a chest at the base, a compact kitchen and the table and two chairs all snuggly arranged, torches lighting up the walls. The one good thing about the space was that light danced across the surface of the diamonds and glittered and refracted around the room in a very pretty way… but it wasn’t really child friendly by any stretch of the word. Or even really adult friendly in Foolish’s opinion but to each his own. 

“Hey Foolish, you almost ready,” Punz said, coming over with Ponk, who was adjusting the straps of her elytra nervously. 

“Yeah, Give me a second,” Foolish ducked inside Skeppy’s house past a huffy Skeppy, and crouched down so he was on a level with Genesis who was still sitting in George’s lap. 

“Pa pa’s got to go on a mission now, but I’ll be back soon. You be good for Skeppy and George ok.” 

Genesis nodded and yawned. Smiling with half lidded eyes, Like swirling pools of dark green, flecked with glittering light and verdant shades. “You be back soon,” She mimicked, sticking her thumb back in her mouth. 

Foolish smiled, cupped her cheek in his hand, her face so small against his palm, and gave her a kiss on the forehead. “Yup, see you soon my little Totem.” Foolish stood up and turned back to Punz who was waiting outside. 

“Alright, I’m ready to do this,” Foolish said, squaring his shoulders. 

[notsodailycake]

I REALLY hope we can save the band in the upcoming DLC. I honestly think there’s a good chance of it happening. I’m pretty sure that no matter the case, Chica will play a large role in it, judging by the fact that the placeholder name was “Chica’s Chowda” AND we see her in the poster. Of all. the animatronics, they chose her, and I don’t think that’s a coincidence. To be perfectly honest, I hope we DON’T see more of Vanessa and Vanny, just because I feel the Glamrocks would crowd them out. IMHO, they should be saved for the sequel game, where they can get more attention. Furthermore, it doesn’t make sense to me to have them still there. Way fewer kids go to pizza places if they’re wrecked.

Well, honestly i agree. Tho i still think that, if we're going fot the Afton ending, then Vanny will somehow still be involved

But as much as i love her, yeah maybe she should play little part into it to give the glamrocks some light. Unless they are ablento find a way to show both i guess

I'm kinda iffy about the whole DLC, mostly bc of my comic and how it will affect my story, since I'm trying to base it close to canon in some way. So yeah

I'll stray away from theories at most tho, and wait till it comes out lol

[sugarcomatosed]

i love your stories so much!! and was wondering if you can give some writing tips perhaps? 🥺👉🏻👈🏻

Breaking this up into sections for you + putting it under a cut cause I went overboard. 😅

General Writing Tips

These work for both academic and creative writing.

Make an outline.

It doesn't have to be a formal one, but having at least a general idea of the scenes you want to include is helpful. If I know my fic is going to be a longer one (like Don't Hesitate was and my current WIP is), I break down the larger story beats i want to hit on a piece of paper or my iPad.

It's good to know what you're planning to do, in a any piece I usually have a single specific scene I want to do and depending on what it is, I might either just do the scene I want to or turn into something longer.

Draft, draft, draft.

I cannot stress the importance of going through and reviewing your work. This is a big part of any sort of writing.

Your first idea isn't always your best idea. As you work on a piece you might find your original idea is holding you back, focus shifts! Don't be afraid to let your work change as you go. It's not always easy to let go of your original idea but if you find it's not working, you have to let it change. Sections will need to be rewritten, things have to be readjusted to fit with later sections. Reread for clarity while you're drafting and look to see if this makes sense to you, or reads well to you. If you can't follow it and you wrote it, chances are your reader can't either. Did you use the same phrase again and again? Find and search it on your doc to double check.

Sometimes you have to cut things you really like because they just don't contribute to the fic anymore. Save those bits and use them somewhere else!In a lot of my longer pieces I will write a paragraph, realize that's not where it should go and cut/paste it into another part of the doc because the pacing/scene doesn't make sense where I had it originally, but it works somewhere else.

If you're stuck, skip around, come back and then stitch the bits you have written together.

Don't Focus on a Word Count

This might be controversial, but I'm of the opinion just because something is longer does not make it better. Some works are short, and that's okay! I very rarely try to aim for a specific count of words unless it's for a prompt exchange or a personal challenge. I write till I feel the piece is done. Some stories require more words, some require less.

Don't Hesitate is a great example of this again, because all I wanted to do was a bittersweet first kiss fic, but jumping write into the kiss wouldn't get the full effect I wanted. Meanwhile, with Old Habits all I wanted to do was write dumb comedic kisses, we didn't need a 2k preamble.

Get Someone You Trust to Edit

My go to editor for the past six years or so is one of my good friends. She has edited everything from college papers to my fics for me before I post them to read for clarity, find any funky phrases or misspelled words I missed, and I do the same for her when she asks! A fresh set of eyes makes a world of a difference. Find someone to trade fics with or ask a friend! They might have good suggestions you never thought of, or be able to tell what you were going for when you don't even know yourself.

I also rely on my friends a lot to brainstorm and talk my ideas out before I start because it helps me think and figure out what I need. It's super common for me to text someone and say "im gonna spitball at you, that okay?" and then spend twenty minutes chatting through my ideas.

Have Reference Material

For my 13sar fics, I regularly go back and review/screenshot videos of the dialogue to make sure I am staying consistent with story events, character nuance and small details. You don't have to go crazy, but it is really helpful to have your source material to go back to and check yourself against. In non creative writing I always had a pile of papers highlighted with my own notes on the margins.

Take Breaks/Pace Yourself

Know your own limits, and if you are working and working on something and it's not coming out leave it alone and come back to it. I'm really bad at this personally because when I get an idea in my head I want to see it through but sometimes you gotta step back! It's not healthy to keep working on things and overwork yourself. Stretch, get up go for a walk.

Write What You Want to Write

Don't focus on what people want to read. Focus on what you like. Find a topic, a scene, anything that you are passionate about and the rest will follow. The only time I write fic for other people is when I am writing for a friend. Even prompt requests I only take open ended ones, if I am not interested in writing it it's not gonna happen. I know it's super hard and I get really anxious sometimes about letting people down now, or worrying people won't like something but then I step back and remind myself this is a hobby and I'm doing it for fun.

Play to Your Strengths

You shouldn't try to write like me, you should try to write like yourself. Find what skills you have and use them to your advantage!

I can't give you a step by step list to write like me, because nobody in the world has my background! We're all unique. Everything I've listed so far I know because I'm not a beginner anymore! I'm in my twenties and have come from a strong academic writing background.

I took on an intensive course load in high school, and then went onto college for a sociology degree. I very rarely had test based finals and at the end of each semester would have five 10-15 page papers to submit. Straight up some of my skills come from having read and studied the works of anthropologist Clifford Geertz. I am not saying you should read anthropology/sociology texts. Unless you like that sort of thing lol

I also have 6+ years of theater experience (acting & directing), I use this all the time for my writing. When I think about a scene, I think about how I would work through it as an actor, how the character would move, and how would things read to an audience. The GOTE ("Goal, Obstacle, Tactics, and Expectation") method of acting by Robert Cohen is really useful hear if you want a more technical breakdown of what I mean by that.

This leads to a lot of what we called "business" in acting, doing small tiny things while you talk or move around on stage to give the sense you're a real human. I don't have to think or try on these sort of things because they're in my skill set already!

Things I do Personally

As in, these are not transferable skills this is just the stuff I do while working on projects.

Find a Vibe™️

I come into any fic with usually a goal I want to hit, a line of dialogue or something I want to capture. Just like, the general idea of a feeling a song even if the lyrics don't match up. Make a mood-board, a playlist, just find something you wanna do. It's less about the actual words on the page and what you're aiming to do.

Look to things that inspire you

Don't Hesitate got written because I wanted to write a fic that captured the same vibe as a scene in Macross Frontier, where two characters have a bittersweet kiss before the final battle and that scene still has me fucked up six years after watching it.

My current WIP is doing the same thing but with the song All I've Ever Known from Hadestown. Two characters working through loneliness, the sudden feeling of falling in love and the frustration that feeling can bring on sometime.

I don't plagiarize them word for word, but these are scenes that inspire me! I also patchwork quilt ideas together. Using Don't Hesitate again, I also ended up pulling from a bunch of shoujo anime, Toradora, Sailor Moon, Yona of the Dawn, Princess Tutu...specific scenes I enjoy to blend and create something new.

Goof Off While You Write

I name my documents stupid things, I write dumb placeholder dialogue or vague sentiments like "insert better word here", I make memes when I'm struggling and roast myself and my predictable tastes.

I spent twenty minutes texting a friend Juro's name with different letters spelt out and then the "fuck your chickenstrips" vine saying it was Juro during destruction. Just have fun with it!

Listen to J-POP On Loop for Hours at a Time

i am not kidding I do this all the time. Perfume, AKB48, anime idol osts, Sailor Moon's OPs/ED, vocaloid songs. I like technopop and Japanese is good because it usually doesn't distract my brain since I only know random phrases, but still know what the meaning og the song is.

I love music, it helps me vibe out.

Thank you so much for enjoying my work ;o;

I hope this is useful to you in some way! I'm so sorry it's so long winded but I am overly thorough and love to teach people ;w;

[freebooter4ever]

i’ve seen the discussion going back and forth on boundaries and sexual objectification, and i don’t have much to add to the conversation other than to say everyone is allowed to determine their OWN ‘lines’ and just because we don’t vocalize them doesn’t make them any less valid. but here’s the limits i set for my blog if anyone feels it is important for them to know (<3):

personally I consider ‘characters’ fair game for anything goes, with ‘public personas’ a little more iffy. ‘RPF’ isn’t new - it just takes on a new more accessible/visible form nowadays. i remember reading my first fic about a ‘real person’ back in my LOTR fandom days - it was a story in first person perspective about the main character meeting orlando bloom on a plane before he was ‘famous’. like a lot of these types of stories, it wasnt so much about the person as it was about the meet cute. the actor was just a convenient placeholder with a handsome face and some personality quirks thrown in to make the romance/dialogue more specific. i personally dont read much xReader fic nowadays, but mostly only cause i’m an old fart who can’t relate to the ‘you’ format. i miss the good old days when people actually created OC’s and then inserted them into things LOL. but also LOL if you think i’ve gone an entire year of quarantine without some imagined personal fantasies of joe mazzello (or steve aoki in the years before)(ramilicious can attest to this. she can also attest to most of these fantasies ending in friendship rather than anything explicit cause that’s just how i roll these days lol). the line i draw is i would never post these types of fics in a place where the subject could accidentally find them - you have to go looking for this stuff on tumblr, most fics are given explicit ratings and under read-mores. with the blacklist tags it’s pretty easy to filter things out. its even easier to add filters to ao3 searches. i am NOT going to do something like message steve aoki and say ‘yeah i watched that movie Ibiza like five times, here is my 1k fic where you’re the dj and i’m the one night stand’. but obviously people still enjoy imagining scenarios like these otherwise movies like Ibiza wouldn’t exist?

for art, i consider anything already on display up for grabs, we all know a certain person’s ass is all over the place...all you have to do is google ‘need for speed’ and rami’s name. HOWEVER, in the case of actors i personally would not draw anything more explicit than what’s already there. i’m not gonna draw full frontal nudity for rami (unless he gifts us with it in a movie, i suppose) or anyone. this is 100% a personal choice for me. 

i was a sophomore or junior in college when i volunteered as a figure drawing monitor where i’d time the nude model’s poses and help them set up the stage and lighting and such. there was this one guy in his mid forties probably, a regular who came every week, and i always thought of him fondly till one day (the day after i ran into my Hot Programming TA during dinner and later sent him an email begging him to go on a date with me because i was desperate for kissing experience)(and Hot Programming TA emailed me back within minutes saying yes) this artist guy who i saw all the time and thought i knew fairly well, decided to draw me instead of the model. which would have been fine except he drew me naked. i was NOT naked at the time, i was wearing a shirt, and a bra, and a full prairie skirt with alternating calico and floral patterns. he drew what he imagined was underneath all that. he came up to me after the figure drawing session and showed me his drawings and told me i had been ‘glowing’ and my response was to laugh it off awkwardly and get the hell out of there as soon as i gave the model their pay check. but inwardly i was thinking a) i was NOT glowing for this creepy man twice my age and b) i did NOT give him consent to sexualize my body under my clothes and then SHOW me that objectification. i never said anything to him or anything else, i continued to be the monitor, and i continued to field off creepy advances from him including multiple job offers, but when i finally realized i could just...stop..and i passed the student volunteer monitor job on to my friend naeem, i also realized that what that older male artist did was NOT ok in my book. and it was probably not something he would do while naeem was monitoring.

nowadays im working in an industry that regularly objectifies female bodies. in the past year alone i have had to deal with requests to make breasts bigger, i have been given character rigs that in addition to the usual elbow, knee, and spine joints also have ‘nipple’ joints but ONLY for the women (to make them jiggle for animation), every time i send out a female pose i get it back with notes that push it further into the sexy type of body language reserved for women (twist the spine more! sway the back more! give it ‘energy!’), i have been told to erase wrinkles and fat and pores but ONLY for the women (men you ADD pores bc realism! and manliness!) and this is all me working for a company that is actually fairly progressive in terms of sexism compared to OTHER studios.

like it or not, sexual objectification is a huge part of specifically women’s lives and how we react to that is our business. for me, turning the tables and putting men on display feels like fair’s fair. i cant stop the men from doing it, so if i want to enjoy sexualizing male bodies, damn it im gonna! like dang it, boy do i want to send steve aoki a thank you note every time he posts a video of himself doing those ice baths during the sunset golden hour bc holy shit gorgeous or working out in his gym wearing VERY little clothes, but i dont because i know what its like when someone imposes their personal fantasies on the subject. or, god, there was that time i had to unfollow nicole’s insta for a while bc i had a very explicit dream about her and realized, shit, i need to take a break and get my emotions under control before i can refollow. and god some of the stuff i see dudes sending her during her live videos on mental illness/meditation is TOTALLY gross and not something they should be confronting her with. and she’s not even ‘famous’ famous. or how some fans send their idols explicit direct messages without consent. THAT feels inappropriate to me.

a part of me feels like i shouldn’t have to defend this. men don’t. they’re even encouraged in mass media to sexualize women. but i also recognize the importance of talking about consent. the importance of recognizing that a celebrity deserves to have their boundaries respected. these are my lines in fandom. other people have different lines they won’t cross, and that’s okay to me. i block or blacklist any blogs or tags i think go over the top.

heck, even in fandom-only spaces i still try to keep my own more sexual fantasies off this blog and only in private messages with my friends and mutuals, and i feel like that might come across as unintentionally prudish or judgmental sometimes. i’m not ‘horny on main’ very often. but like...every time i reblog that particular ‘washing machine’ gif of joe mazzello am i thinking about him naked and thinking about how he’s got very loooooong feet, and ‘gee i wonder if that means /other/ things are Too Big for my tastes’ but also ‘gosh wouldnt that make a pretty picture to draw’???? hell yeah.

i dont know who is gonna actually read this essay but yolo i guess :)

[man-me--a-sand]

Carving Myself a Space

Rating: Teen and up

Characters: in this chapter, only Janus, Patton, and Roman (Logan and Remy are mentioned)

Words:1249

TW: ptsd of a sort? flashback to a fire

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26079001/chapters/63430678

Summary:  Janus was perfectly content to keep where they were. Yes, it wasn’t a great place, but if they were placed with somebody, too much attention would go to them, to much pressure saying be a girl. Of course, the universe never gives you what you want, but it does give you what you need, sometimes.

Notes: I’ve been planning this for a bit but posting it was an impulsive decision, there is still enough written for a decent posting schedule

Janus shoved through the door, glaring at the floor.

“Greetings! So this is Lydia?” Janus winced at the name, and glanced up to see a freckled face grinning at them. “I’m Roman Sanders.”

Janus glanced up at the man. “And?”

The smile started to slip. “I thought you would want to know my name? You are living with me and my husband.”

“Yeah, for like two weeks.” They scoffed. “I can promise you’ll be done with me soon. I give you about two weeks.”

“That won't happen,” Roman chuckled. “We’ve dealt with a lot of tough stuff, I’m sure we can handle anything you throw at us, but anyways, come upstairs! I can show you the house, you can get unpacked, get used to the house, you can go anywhere you want! Dinner’s not for about a half hour, but my husband will want to meet you when he gets home around then.!”

Janus rolled their eyes as they headed up the stairs after Roman.

“I’ll show you around, starting with up here.” He gestured at a closed door. “Right there is what’ll be your room, and there's a bathroom on the right that should be exclusively you. Mine and Pattons room is right over there, with another bathroom.

The man and teen went back downstairs, where Roman led them into the kitchen. “You can take any food whenever, just stay out of that cupboard.” He pointed to above the stove. “The living rooms right here, and we have a ton of video games to choose from. Basement isn't that interesting, just another tv and old boxes and stuff. Lots of old posters and things like that.”

Janus shrugged. “Sounds pretty cool.”

“Alright, I’ll help you unpack then?”

There was no protest, so Roman followed as they went back upstairs. The blonde man sat on the bed, picking at his nails. “I just wanted to chat, if there's anything that's not in your file.”

“Ok?”

“Alright then, what pronouns do you use?”

Janus settled, a bit more at ease, but they didn't blink.“They/them.”

Roman settled comfortably. “Alright. I would say I’m sorry about what happened to your parents, but judging by what I read, it’s not really wanted, at least for your dad?.”

“Yeah,” Janus shifted. “My dad was a piece of shit, and my mom didn't know how to handle things and take care of me.” They said bitterly.

“Oh, also, is there any other name you’d like us to use?”

“There's no other name. There's just my name.”

“And what name is that?” Roman said softly.

“Janus.”

“Alright. We can call you Janus. Also, do you have any allergies, or triggers?” Janus didn’t respond, so Roman rushed on talking. “Triggers are-”

“I know what triggers are.” Their tone didn't change, but something told Roman that he wouldn't get any more answers.

Roman shuffled out, pushing back more questions that bubbled up in his throat.

Janus stared up at the ceiling, completely zoned out. They ran their fingers through their choppy hazel hair, trying to keep the years-old memory from resurfacing.

Scorched skin.

They traced the burn mark that decorated the left side of their face.

Their mom on the floor, a shroud of smoke surrounding her.

A finger traced the cut that went just past the corner of their mouth, stopping at the edge of their neck.

Stuckstuckstuckstuck- no.

There wasn't time for this. Janus shoved the memories back, They had to protect themself. Sure, these new people seemed a bit better. They had asked for pronouns, asked about triggers. Soon enough they would get sick of the sad kid with the burn scars, sending them off to the next family.

“Did she get here, Ro?” A bubbly voice pierced through the thoughts.

Janus peered over the railing, seeing a dark skinned man with short, tight curls talking to Roman. His husband, probably.

“Yeah, they’re upstairs.”

As the shorter man went to go upstairs, Roman grabbed him by the arm. “Hold up, Pat. Their name is actually Janus, and they just told me they use they/them, and they seem pretty against this whole fostering stuff.”

Pat grinned. “Well, I’m sure I can get them more comfortable here!” He dashed up the stairs, and Janus jumped back to the room their stuff was in.

They were staring back up at the ceiling when Pat walked in.

“Hey, you’re Janus, right? I’m Patton, Roman’s husband. Sorry I wasn't here to meet you. So, what do you like to do, kiddo?” He cocked his head to the side, curiously awaiting an answer.

“I draw?” They muttered, gesturing at the sketchbook on the nightstand.

“Oh, cool! Can I see?”

Janus raised an eyebrow. They pulled out a loose, crumpled page and tossed it on the bed.

Patton smoothed it out and shock crossed his face. “Kiddo, you’re fantastic! Who taught you?”

“Nobody.”

“I don't believe that! This is fantastic, such a pretty art style! Have you posted it anywhere?”

“No.”

“Have you ever thought about it?” Patton pushed, trying to get an answer from the fifteen year old. He flipped through the pages, looking at a medley of different art. “Is this one you?”

Janus tightened up, seeing which drawing he was looking at. “Uh, yeah.”

“Cool. Well, we should probably go down for dinner.”

“So, did you want to switch schools, or take the longer trip to your old school? It would probably be easier to switch, but we’re willing to drive you. I do teach at the school here, so you might want to go to your old school still, it could be a little awkward.” Roman asked as they all sat down.

Janus shuddered, imagining the long drive alone with one of them. When it was their parents, or even some of those families they’d stayed with, car rides longer than ten minutes would be pure torture. No reason to think that would change. “No, I’ll just switch. Not like you’re my dad or anything.” They poked around the food on their plate,

Romans shoulders slumped, but he consoled himself quickly. It had only been a few hours, he couldn't expect Janus to think like that. They would come around , could be part of the little family.

Patton grinned. “We can introduce you to Logan, and Remy, they’ll be willing to show you around!”

“Cool.”

“We do need rules still, Pat.” Roman said goodnaturedly.”We’re pretty lax on that, though, Basically, text us where you head after school, don't get arrested, and either be home in time for dinner, or ask if you plan to go have dinner with friends or stuff like that.”

Janus winced. “I don’t actually have a phone.”

“Oh, we’ll have to fix that. After dinner we can find my old phone to use as a placeholder till we can get you a newer model, and that way we can put the old sim card to use!” Patton exclaimed.

After dinner, and a decent bit of confusion on clearing the phone of photos and things, Janus was handed a blank phone.

“You should set some of your art as a background! That would look pretty cool.”

The teen retreated, playing around with the phone. On the app store, they noticed a free drawing app, and pulling out a touchscreen pen, started to colour some of their pencil art, which they had never done before. Good markers and pens were too expensive for them, so they had always stuck to pencil art.

Taglist (Of 2 people but still):

@panromanticpancake

@shamelesslypoetic

[anousiemay]

The Angel & The Devil Ch. 1 A Lie Burns Many Bridges

Guardian and The Red Hood are hot on the trail of Black Mask. Trying to find just what he has invested in this time. In an attempt to find answers, The Red Hood does something he instantly regrets, putting his relationship with Guardian on the rocks. Can he salvage their relationship or will he lose another person in his life? Another gorgeous commission by @symeona​ and another fic by yours truly! While the moment I pictured this image doesn’t appear till chapter 4 I thought it’d be a good placeholder hehe. Another Jason x Anita fic cos I’m in love with them being in love. This fic is also on ao3!  https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anousie/ ----- "Are we going to be meeting this 'Angel' you keep mumbling about?" In the little time Jason had spent with his new teammates, he'd learnt that Artemis is not one to beat around the bush. In fact, she'd most likely beat the metaphorical bush to bits if need be.

The long flight back to Qurac had eased Jason's mind but left his body weary. It was the first time in years that Jay had ever felt so tired. Especially after facing his past and stopping a crazed Amazonian from killing hundreds with the Bow of Ra. It could be said this was all in a day's work for someone of his profession. But as the plane’s wheels touched Gotham Airport tarmac, his heart began to ache. For now, he was back in Gotham with his relationship with Anita most definitely on the rocks. "Yes, Princess. You both will, but I'd prefer if I was alone with her first." "Red Him am embarrassed by Red Her and Bizarro?" Oh Bizarro, precious, brutally strong Bizarro. Jason was much more embarrassed in himself. "No of course not, big guy. But Guardian and I probably aren't on the best terms right now." "You are lucky we are in a public place or I would have thrown you fifty yards. Do not call me princess." Artemis spat as she rose from her seat on the plane. Ah yes, he forgot about that. That's what he'd say if he was lying. "Sorry," He really wasn't. "Well, I guess I'll take you guys to one of my safehouses. C'mon, I need a shower." "Oh good, I swear your jacket was becoming a part of your flesh." "Red Him am made of jacket?" "No, Bizarro. I am not."

- - - - The safehouse was surprisingly spacious enough for all three of the Outlaws to occupy. Artemis had placed her axe in the kitchen when they arrived. To which Jason had promptly asked her to leave it in her room. Bizarro on the other hand, was fascinated by the PS4 currently humming and the controller Jason had placed in his hand. "Give it a shot, B. Skyrim's a pretty good game." Then, once sure the two were settled and not putting their weapons in kitchens; Jason grabbed some spare clothes and jumped into the shower. How good it felt to be under hot water. Jason took this moment of solitude to reflect on the past few weeks. Two weeks ago, Anita, known as Guardian to the public, and himself had been hot on the trail of Black Mask's latest investment. The Angel and Devil (aptly named by goons due to her wings and his red helmet) were scaring thugs and opening crates of 'funky techno shit' as Anita had called it nightly. But neither were getting anywhere. Dead end after unconscious thug with no real lead on just what Black Mask was planning. That's when Jason had turned to Bruce, asking him to trust his wayward son with taking down Black Mask himself. "You want me to pretend I know nothing? She won't buy it for a second, Jason." Bruce had been rather shocked by Jason’s latest proposition. "I know, I don't need her to buy it. But if she knows what I’m doing she'll hold back. It's the only way." "Wasn't it a while back you and the others were adamant, we'd be honest with one another?" Bruce uttered as he opened a few files on the Bat Computer. Jason laughed then, Bruce did too. Neither were that good at being honest. "She won't be happy, Jason. She's not like us. It was hard for her to get her around being a meta and now you're doing this?" Jason sighed, how could he forget? Anita had been a mess, he had let her down and couldn't save her in time from the bastard who implanted the meta-gene. But now she was Guardian, a symbol of hope for Gothamites and himself. She was a good person; mask on or off. But Jason well, Jason wasn't always a good person, even if she disagreed. He left soon after, his response dangling in the air. "I have to, Bruce. It's the only way."

- - - It was April 12th and the moon was hung high in the air. No clouds in Gotham meant there'd be a lot of evil out tonight. Guardian peered through her night vision binoculars for the third time in 3 minutes, she was insanely bored. Red Hood had briefed her that The Bowery had seen a lot more foot traffic than usual in the construction site across from the apartment building roof she sat on. They were to watch the place for any unusual activity. At least she had some food to keep her occupied. "So, what do you think of Gina's Kebabs?" She asked through her microphone, trying not to stain her white outfit as she took another bite.

A small crackle from her earpiece, then Red Hood’s deep voice cut through the midnight wind: "I think it's more grease than lamb, Angel. I'd give it a 3 sober. What about you?"

Guardian giggled, "Well my chicken one is actually pretty warm still, so I give it a 5 for its longevity."

"You're definitely the nicer mark out of us two." Red Hood responded, an airy chuckle leaving his throat. "Oh, Red. I'm the nicer everything out of us." "Excuse you? I have a hotter bod than yours." Guardian faked a gasp, but he had played himself into a trap: "That’s not what’cha said last night." "I wasn't sober!" "Exactly, you were drunk on this fine glass of wine." Guardian stood up and shook her hips, knowing the vigilante on the building across from her was watching. "Just shut up and watch the roads."

"Aww, you're precious, babe." Guardian teased but resumed watching the roads below. 30 minutes passed before finally, something happened: a large truck reversed into the opened shutter of a warehouse next to the construction site. 5 minutes later, two men came out on motorbikes and sped off towards Founders Island. Bingo. "Shall we give chase?" Guardian was already extending her wings before Red Hood surprised her. "No, let's see what they've left. Bats can handle them." She spotted his silhouetted figure grapple down from his building. "Are you sure the grease in that kebab didn't poison you? This is our chance to get some info!" Guardian questioned as she flew down to the warehouse, meeting her partner who was already trying to lift the metal door. "Or break some bones for absolutely nothing." He huffed out, Guardian sighed and grabbed the metal door, throwing it up with one hand. "Since when were you against breaking bones?" "Anita." His voice was stern, Red wasn't kidding around. "Jason?" She shot back; this wasn't like him. The tall man sighed and took off his helmet, he only ever did that when he wanted to get a point across. Or make out, but she doubted that was the reason this time. "I just think it'd be better for us to keep our eyes on whatever they've bought here. We can catch up with them another time, but what if what's on this truck is the answer to what Black Mask is up to?" "But why would he leave it here unguarded if it was, Jay? It makes no sense, it'd have to be some dud shipment, right?"

Damnit, she was too smart for her own good. But Jason had one more card up his sleeve.

"Just humour me?"

The two stared at each other for a few beats before Anita finally sighed and walked into the warehouse. "Fine, but you owe me a Banana Split from Freddie's when you see that I'm right." "Yes ma'am." Jason affirmed before clicking his helmet back on. The two waltzed over to the back of the truck and Anita ripped the metal back off, placing it next to them. "Your super strength is getting easier to handle?" Jason questioned, pressing their bodies close as they peered into the trucks back. "Yeah and the wings aren't playing up as much either." Anita admitted, in fact her powers had been functioning well these past few nights. Jason smiled from under his helmet, running a gloved hand along her feathers. "You do look beautiful with them, you know?" Anita blushed at the compliment, still feeling rather insecure about them. "You trying to butter me up, so you don't have to get me a Banana Split?" "No! Maybe… Is it working?" "Tell me I have a better bod than you and I'll reconsider." Anita teased as the two began grabbing crates and opening them on the warehouse floor. "I'd have to perform a full examination to know." He poked back swiftly. "Ugh, men."

After going through all the crates, Anita let out an exasperated sigh. "See? I told you it was a dud shipment. But why would he have one? What do you think Red?" Anita waited a few moments; hearing Jason unlatch one of his guns from its thigh holster. "Red?"

A small click then a loud bang. Guardian fell to the ground in pain, looking at her leg she saw a bullet lodged into her kneecap and blood staining her suit. But Guardian doesn't bleed, she hasn't since she got these wings. Just what the hell was in these bullets? Her head started feeling light but willed herself to look up at the shooter: Red Hood held his pistol at her now sweating forehead. Pulling the chamber back and wrapping his finger tight on the trigger. The only thought that passed through Anita's head was: ‘What the fuck?!’

[makorragal-312]

Void (Part 2)

“Go. Be with the ones you love.”

And with those final words, the room was dismissed. Keith watched as everyone in the room cleared out, ready to follow Shiro’s advice and be with their friends and loved ones one final time before they head out to stop Honerva. His eyes were particularly trained on a certain Red paladin, whom for some reason looked a bit more nervous than usual as he and Hunk were the last ones to walk out the room.

The black paladin can’t remember how long it’s been since he and Lance last talked. He honestly thought that as soon as they landed back on Earth. they would’ve been able to continue their short-lived conversation on that random planet they were on after defeating Lotor. But instead, the two of them, along with the rest of their team, were caught up in another hectic battle as they had to fight Zendak and force his troops off of the planet. That, and the fact that all of them almost got themselves killed in the process and spent most of their time in hospital beds. That couldn’t have been more than at least a month ago, a fact that makes the now 20-year-old paladin cringe.

“Keith? Everything alright?" Keith turned his head to look at Shiro, who was looking at him with concern and confusion as he held some documents. He didn’t realize just how long he had been standing and possibly staring at the doorway until he heard him speak.

"Um, yeah. I just…had-”

“Had?” Shiro asked again, a hint of a small smirk on his face.

“Have a lot on my mind.” Keith replied. He walked towards the front of the table where Shiro was and sat down at the first chair with a heavy sigh. Shiro, sensing the slight distress in his brother, set down his documents and grabbed a chair, pulling it towards the black paladin.

“Well, I’m here now. You know you can tell me anything.”

“I don’t want to take up your time or anything. You’ve been pretty busy. You know, being the new captain and all.” Shiro sent him a chuckle and placed a hand on Keith’s shoulder.

“I’ve always got time for you, bud. Talk to me.” Keith smiled. Even after everything that happened with them and the clone, it was as if nothing had changed between them. Though he doesn’t like to admit, the half-Galran was worried that his relationship with Shiro would change after he found out that he was in the astral plane. A part of him continued to blame himself for how quick he was to believe that the Shiro he saved from the space craft was actually a clone. How he could’ve spared the team so much grief if he had figured it out before he left. How he could’ve saved him during their battle with Zarkon. But as soon as Shiro woke up, he made sure to let him know that he wasn’t to blame, resulting in a tight hug and various “I missed yous” and “I love yous.” Keith let out another sigh, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Well, it kinda has something to do with Lance.” he confessed. Shiro’s brows began to furrow as he let out somewhat of a disappointed sigh.

“Don’t tell me you guys are at each other’s throats again.” Shiro whined.

“No! No, it’s not like that. At least not this time. It has to do with Lance, but mainly to do with me? It’s complicated.” Keith bowed his head and clasped his hands. Shiro leaned forward in concern, crossing his arms over his knees as he waited for him to continue.

“When we were on that one planet, after Allura brought you back. Me and Lance were talking for a bit. It sounded like he wanted to tell me something important. But before he could say anything, we had to leave. I honestly thought that once we came back home, we could talk again. But then we had Ezor and Zethrid and that stupid game show. And then we found out that Earth was already invaded. Then the fight with Sendak and me and the team almost dying. And then us recovering and getting ready now to face Honerva. And even with all of this, the only thing I could think about was- WHY THE HELL IS THIS BOTHERING ME SO MUCH?!” Keith screamed in anger, falling back hard against the seat.

Shiro looked at him for a moment.

“Are you sure you don’t know? Because I think you just said it yourself.” Shiro responded. Keith looked at his brother, eyes filled with a mixture of confusion and exhaustion. He was so busy ranting that he didn’t realize exactly what he said. He honestly didn’t expect to be so affected by an unfinished conversation.

“It’s just…when Lance and I talked, I really felt like he was trying to tell me something important. Something that involved…me. And I couldn’t help but feel like I did something to him. But I think I know. I didn’t just abandon the team. I abandoned him. I just up and left him to handle one disaster after another. Hell! He died, Shiro! If it wasn’t for Allura, he would’ve-”

“But he didn’t. He’s okay.” Shiro grasped his shoulder and shook Keith gently. 

“He’s going to be okay.”

“Yeah. Because of Allura." Keith said quite darkly. Both his and Shiro’s eyes widened. He honestly didn’t mean to say the Altean’s name so bitterly, but for some reason it came out that way. Keith quickly stood from his chair, looking down at Shiro in worry.

"I-I didn’t mean to say it like that! I swear, I just mean-” he started, only for Shiro to rise with him, placing his hands in front of him and moving them in a soothing motion.

“It’s okay. It’s okay. I know you didn’t mean it-”

“But I did! Just not like that.” Keith finished. He walked past his brother as he began to explain.

“Look, I’m not trashing Allura. I know she wouldn’t intentionally hurt Lance. But for some reason I just can’t get over the fact that she was actually liking Lotor knowing how he felt about him. How he felt about her. And I know that people are allowed to move on with other people and it may be easy for some and hard for others. If Allura feels like moving on with Lance, so be it. And if Lance is willing, so be it. It’s his choice.”

“But?” Keith stood in place, head hung low probably in shame.

“Keith, you can say it.”

“I just don’t want him to feel like a placeholder. I don’t want Allura to be with him just because Lotor’s gone. I want her to be with him because she wants to. I’m just worried that should they get together and then down the line she wants to drop out, Lance will be…He’s gonna be-”

“A rebound.” Shiro finished for him.

“Yeah. I’m horrible, aren’t I? My friend might get the girl of his dreams, and I’m demolishing it when he’s not even here. How fucked up is that?” Keith placed his head in his hand, shaking back and forth in regret. Shiro walked up and pulled him into a comforting side hug.

“Keith, you’re not horrible. If anything, you’re being responsible. You want to make sure Lance comes out okay. You want him to be happy. You don’t want him to get hurt. Keith let out another heavy sigh.

"It’s more than that.”

“What do you mean?”

“Did my mom tell you when we were stranded on that space whale?”

“The same one where you found Kosmo and aged two years? Yeah. She mentioned something about flashes?”

“Yeah. Everyone now and then, there would be these big flashes of light in front of us. We would end up seeing the past and the future. That’s how I saw my fight against-” Keith stopped. He didn’t really like bringing up the clone situation around Shiro, given the sensitivity (and he’s currently residing in the clone’s body spiritually). But Shiro being Shiro is understanding of it, despite always saying that he’s come to terms with it.

“You don’t have to explain. I get it.” Keith chuckled, grateful for having someone so understanding and empathetic for a brother.

“Thanks. But there was a moment where I got caught in the flash. It was the future. I saw me and Lance. And-” Shiro cocked an eyebrow.

“And?” he asked. He watched as Keith turned his head and looked down. His eyes were focused on a section of the floor and the older of the two could’ve sworn he saw a faint blush. And Keith almost never blushed. Shiro stared at him a moment longer as realization began to dawn upon his white floof and eventually his head.

“OH.” Shiro finally replied.

“Yeah. We had…gotten closer. And at first I couldn’t understand it. I just kept thinking ‘Why Lance? Of all people?’ But then, everything just made sense. All this time, while me and Lance were becoming less of rivals and more of friends. And now, I want more than that.” Keith stated somberly.

“And now you feel like you can’t because he’s going after Allura.” Shiro finished. Keith finally raised his head looking at the ceiling somberly.

“Yeah.” he replied, voice cracking. Shiro gripped him closer towards him. He knew this feeling all too well. When he was younger and more reckless, he thought he didn’t have a chance with Adam. Even though they had shared the same classes, were in the same units, and shared the same dorm, he had felt like he wouldn’t be able to reach him. Shiro was carefree, open, and hated being restricted. Adam was reserved, slightly ajar to others, and was fairly restrained. Yet despite all this, they brought out the best in each other and was quite the shock when people found out they were friends. He loved Adam, but so did everybody else. Guys and girls alike coming up to him to shoot their shot. Until one day he decided to just bite the bullet and confess. Instead of a rejection, he got a sigh of relief, a smile, and a “What took you so long?” Down the line, they were dating for four years, with Shiro proposing around Adam’s birthday. And were only engaged for one year till everything came crashing down. And even though the former black paladin would give anything to go back in time and change the outcome of their future, he wouldn’t change their journey for the world.

Shiro hated seeing his brother go through this. He was there to see the beginning of Keith and Lance’s dynamic. He saw them fight with each other but he also saw them fight for each other. He saw them laugh together and celebrate victories together. Even when he was within Black, he sensed the two paladins become closer than ever. There was even a moment in time where he thought that eventually there could be something forming between them that was beyond the bonds of friendship. But he remembered Allura. And how infatuated Lance was for her. And he sensed how hurt he was when she started getting closer with Lotor. He didn’t know all of the details and frankly he didn’t want to for he felt that he knew enough. But he did know that if anything, Lance and Keith need to continue that conversation they had earlier before things got more complicated.

“I’m going to try to talk to him. But I’m not gonna tell him what I just told you.” Keith spoke firmly. Shiro looked down at him, but eventually sighed.

“If that’s what you want to do, I won’t stop you. I just want you to be happy. Whether it’s with Lance or not. Okay?” Keith finally looked at him, eyes slightly glistening and a slight smile on his face.

“Okay. Thanks, brother. I love you.” Keith turned and gave Shiro a tight frontal hug, with Shiro responding by holding him tightly, his new Garrison arm stroking his now long hair.

“Love you too, little brother.” Shiro replied. They pulled away after a minute or two. Keith gave him one last smile as he turned to walk towards the door. He then stopped and turned around.

“I’m heading out to find Kosmo and chill for a bit. Want to join me?” Shiro smiled.

“I’d love to, but Iverson wants me to check these documents first. I’ll come find you later.” Keith nodded and headed out. Shiro sat down and looked at the documents, but didn’t focus on the words. He sighed and looked at the ceiling, giving a short laugh.

Adam, please help our kid. I’m getting too old for this.

[sandrawrites13]

dragged away | | day six

“ no-one will touch you. . . 

                                                               . . . i’d rip their heads off if they tried. ”

welcome to day six of the thirty-one days of horror! i’ve decided i’m going to include a quote from a song that you can listen to while reading for more of a spooky effect. the quote you read above is by lights fades low and is entitled touch.

which, brings me right into the sixth prompt: dragged away. following reader and kara from detroit: become human.

triggers: kidnapping, android reader, slight torture

 Model YN400

SERIAL NUMBER 981 203 616

U-VERSION 13.3 HARD DRIVE SERIAL 0913

                            REBOOTING

                            LOADING BIOS. . . 

SYSTEM INITIALIZING

CHECKING BIOCOMPONENTS. . . OK

INITIALIZING BIOSENSOR. . . OK

INITIALIZING B ENGINE. . . OK

MEMORY STATUS

                 ALL SYSTEMS OK

CHECKING FILE. . . 

REINSTALLING NAME REGISTRATION COMPONENT REQUIRED

[O][REPLACE] 

[∆][REMOVE] 

  When you wake up, your muscles are stiff. Your software-style bones, waltzed inside of your robotic skin dances and you straighten from the darkness that was surrounding you. Your memories are clouded, and for some reason, you’re stuck with merely a clicking tock of your brain. Your chest aches. Your vision is blurred. 

You attempt to stand, only to get pushed back by a mysterious force - you find later to be the feel of . . . what seems like someone else, but you can tell by your software initiations that nobody is touching you. 

Your LED light glows yellow. 

You’re perplexed - nobody is there to guard you or to tell you what to do. You have no instructions. You don’t even remember who you are - or what you’re designed for. 

In fact, you are pretty sure you may be broken. 

Darkness is still secluding you, and you can feel your LED light glowing red from the restraints you have against the environment. 

You’re powerless.

[X][SCREAM OUT]

 [O][ATTEMPT TO MOVE]

 Your muscles click involuntarily and you shakily stay quiet for a moment, examining the scenario. You can hear the sounds of people moving in the other room, some people talking, but of course, none in your setting. 

“Hello, is anybody out there?” you ask cautiously. Your voice is feminine, and squeaky - if not high pitched.

Once again, there is silence. Your auditory respiration responses glitch for a moment, and you hear static, but then returns almost as quick as it had arrived. 

“Hello, is anybody there?” you repeat, hesitantly. 

“It’s awake.” You can’t make out the sound of the voice - only that it’s childlike and a tad bit on the masculine side. Your memories scurry, but you can’t figure out if you have identified it in the past. You shift in your place. 

“I’m awake,” you confirm. 

“I didn’t think it would be awake,” someone asked, disbelieved. 

[X][WHO ARE YOU]

[O][WHERE AM I]

“Hey, you’re not the one who asks the damn--.” 

“James!” exclaims a louder, more booming voice, yet you can tell by the way it is moving through the air and the formation of it below you that it belongs to someone smaller. “The lady asked where she is. We should be gentleman and show her.” 

“You’re just saying that ‘cause she’s hot!” the same one replied snarkily. 

“They are an android, though. I do not understand,” a younger girl asks. You can feel the trepidation rising in your throat. You squirm, unable to come to a conclusion of how you’re sitting. “What is their name?” 

“Y/N. . . Sent by Cyberlife. . .” you breathe out. “Now tell me who you are. Now.” 

“Who fucking gives a shit?” the man asks, growling from the sound of it. His voice is closer than you thought, making its way right before your nose. You can feel his breath against your skin. 

“James!” 

“What? We have to wait till the boss come anyway!” he retorted. “They’re about on their way. We might’se well just rough ‘em up and scare ‘em a bit.” 

“They’re just an android,” the girl replied.

[X][FACTUAL]

[O] [THREATENING] 

[∆][FRIENDLY] 

[□][UNDERSTANDING]

 “My design is built in with a classical guardian programming, in your aspects. By hurting me, you will be hurting yourself, as it has a recoil that will most certainly affect you negatively--.” 

“That ain’t true!” the man -- presumed under the name James replied. “You would’a bust us up already if that was true. We’re not dumb.” 

“We’re not all dumb,” the other girl commented. You hold back a growl and reanalyze the situation, taking in every breath - every sharp inhale. That’s when you notice the soft-spoken girl has yet to speak besides examining you’re an android. You use this to your advantage. 

“I am simply an Android. I have done no harm. I’m asking you, let me--.” 

“Oh, shut the fuck up. Hell you ‘ did nothing wrong! ’. . . We know you did shit wrong. Cristina, don’t listen to her,” James screamed. 

“Dude, what the fuck? Can you calm down for five seconds, or is that too hard for you?” 

“What about we--?” 

“Shut up, Blake!” 

[O] [THREATENING]

[∆][FRIENDLY]

[□][UNDERSTANDING]

“There’s a reason you’re doing this, I’m supposing,” you say in the softest voice you can muster, besides complete silence. 

“‘Course there is. There’s a reason for everything, ain’t there? Do you think we’re just being here to be here?” 

“Well, whatever it is. I’m sure we can work it out. You have to give me a shot, though. I can’t even remember why I’m here. Perhaps if you guys helped me, and told me why, I would be of more use to you. Right now, all I am is a piece of plastic. You need to help me help you.” 

“We don’t need your help, got that?” he asked. “You and that AX400 -- you two are some real pieces of work. She’s worried ‘bout you.”

“What are you talking about?” 

“You’re a placeholder. A piece of waiting material. You’re here because they don’t know how to scrap you at Cyberlife. So, you’re here. For us to scrap with. Shut up and keep your mouth quiet. Got it?��� 

It took about an hour, but you could tell that they had all left shortly after he said that. You had suspected it about 30 minutes prior, but you were unable to use your motion tracker given that it had been damaged. 

You were about to open your mouth to speak before you could hear the sound of someone approaching, and immediately you could feel yourself getting prepared for whatever was going to come. 

Your restrains were hard, but not too bad, and you knew-- you just knew -- you could get out of them if you tried, but now it was no use given that someone was right in front of you. 

You were expecting another cold scolding, or somebody to hurt you, (also in their words “scrap you”), but were instead given a cold, and comforting hand to the side of your cheek as the same girl took your blindfold off. 

You were met with an android, her sparkling eyes staring inside of yours. Inside was something you couldn’t understand, and before you knew it she was pulling you close and giving you a small kiss on your lips, holding you tight. 

“Come on, we need to get out of here. Alice is waiting.” 

“Who’s Alice?” you asked, “and who the Hell are you?”