#<- gonna start using that tag for these fellas

[possiblynya]

When in doubt, redraw your dnd party as animal crossing characters (again) 🥳

[elderwisp]

◁ || ▷

Atlas: Taryn? Hey!

Atlas: What happened-

Taryn: Please don’t. 

Atlas: Can you talk to me?

Taryn: [ strained ] What is there to say that you don’t already know? I keep asking myself why you’re so nice to me all of a sudden. Why would someone like you be around someone like me and it’s such a… Mind-fuck. 

Atlas: I swear to you, it isn’t like that-

Taryn: Am I just a one night stand?

Atlas: [ stammers ] N-No! 

Taryn: Convincing.

Atlas: I’m sorry it wasn’t a good enough response, I’m just caught off guard. Why would you assume that?

Taryn: Because my questions made sense the minute you walked out of that building and there was lipstick smeared all over your face. Then you gave me this look, something about it made me realize I wasn’t the first and I don’t think I’d be the last. 

Atlas: [ flatly ] We didn’t even catch each other's name, that’s how little it meant. 

Taryn: [ barely a whisper ] Oh now that’s incredibly fucked up… Was that supposed to make me feel better?

Atlas: Bee-

Taryn: [ voice breaks ] Was it worth it? [ pauses ] Don’t… Answer that. I’m… Gonna go now.

[totentnz]

thinking about johnny with a mustache.... not in a funny haha making fun of him kinda way but in a i think he'd rock it kinda way

[potato-elf]

personal posting in the tags again beware

[syoddeye]

reading recs

received an anon the other day that requested fic recs of all ratings, here's a big list of some of my favorites! definitely not exhaustive, definitely forgot people, and i am so sorry in advance for that. please mind the tags on these fics.

SNAFU by @adnauseum11

I've posted about SNAFU before. This is one of my comfort series. Excellent characterization of a retired John Price, navigating a relationship with one of his oldest friends.

Heavy Weighs the Crown by @sentientcave

Newer series, very yummy so far. I love Charlie's characterization of the 141 in this universe, and their writing is delectable.

Rugby AU by @sentientcave

Another banger from Charlie. Reader Ripper is also yummy. Something to snack on. To quote: "I don't know anything about Rugby tbh this is just vibes and thots. Something somethin elaborate rituals."

Nobody by @391780

My gateway fic into Nikto. Without giving anything away, every chapter sends me into a short spiral. The most recent chapters have done heinous (affectionate) things to my brain.

Ursa Major by @the-californicationist

Have you ever been to Alaska? Ever wanted to visit? Honestly, read this fic and let Cali transport you there. Her ability to set the scene and bring it to life is un-fucking-matched. Doc (Reader) is a smart, confident reader-insert that feels like a real person.

Binders and Boyfriends by @pfhwrittes

Trans 141 and Trans Reader supremacy. Another comfort series from the wonderful Parker. Everything listed here is wonderful, but I have a major soft spot for P's Gaz-centric works.

Housemate!Gaz by @pfhwrittes

First, in this house, we hate Reader's roommate. Second, we are Widget fans. Third, could you fucking imagine opening the door and your new roommate was Kyle motherfucking Garrick? I'd faint.

Call of The Jurassic by @stuffireadandenjoy

Another newer series that put me on the edge of my seat. When I first saw that Tats was giving us my favorite fellas and putting them in Jurassic Park, ooooooh, I knew we were going to be spoiled rotten.

Wrong Number Right Day by @stuffireadandenjoy

"Kyle gets a wrong number text but decides to be a little generous that day." Reader's living the dream. Text Kyle Garrick and get cash money for rent? Very excited for more of this.

Price of Pegging by @gemmahale

Pegging and John Price. I could stop there, but I won't. Gemma nails the depiction of a submissive Captain Price. She also captures the dynamic of a couple trying something new extremely well, that gave me some fluffy feelings.

All of Gemma’s WIPs by @gemmahale

I've had the absolute privilege to read some previews of Gemma's work and the WORK and the DETAIL and the CHARACTERS are chef's kiss. Delicious. It's so difficult to pick just one. I love the Feywilds. Useful Girl. Call of the Wild. Do yourself a favor and spend some time in the tags.

Offer Me His Hunger by @kaadaaan

Something about a 141-er and a single mom that's gonna do it for me every time. In Offer Me His Hunger, it's Johnny, and Reader has no idea what she's in for. Jesus Christ, Kadan writes one of my favorite Johnnys, and really nails that obsessive and calculating streak.

The Space in Between by @391780

You will laugh, you will cry, you will love and hate mafia boss!John Price. Reader crosses paths with John and the 141, and gets caught in their wake. Early writes some of the best Reader characters of all time, and this one's no different. This story will get under your skin so fast, in the best way.

The Arrangement by @391780

Speaking of Early, this is THE gateway drug to her work, in my humble opinion. One of the first COD fics I ever read and converted me into being a Price girlie. Sugar Daddy Price x a cute, smart, and fucking funny Reader. Also one of my favorite characterizations of Simon of all time.

Club 141 by @greatstormcat

BDSM and the 141 make a Sy very happy. Reader starts off with a fake ass dom and is quickly properly introduced to BDSM culture with the fellas. Really solid group dynamics. Make sure you read that Price x Ghost post for a good fucking time.

Lamb to the Slaughter by @ohbo-ohno

Probably one of my favorite Ghoap fics of all time. The way my jaw was on the floor for the majority of this should've sent me to the emergency room. It's brutal, it's horrifying, and fuck me running, I loved it, start to finish.

The Pit by @peachesofteal

First, the nightmare of getting into an accident in the winter. Second, having Ghost and Soap find you. Oh boy, The Pit is peak Ghoap manipulation. When I got to the end, I just sat in silence. Stunned. It was amazing.

Eyes Wide, Tongue Tied by tippytulip (if you're on here, pls lmk!)

Another early COD fic for me. A thrill ride with a whip-smart Reader AND it's set in the Midwest. Those are two ways into my heart. The relationship between Reader and Price isn't an easy one, and he gives her a dozen and a half reasons to dislike him. Another ride of a fic, with great action scenes and group dynamics.

Trapper, Keeper by @tinypandacakes

A König fic that makes me screech no less than ten times per chapter. Panda writes a fucking scary König and it blows my mind. So much of it is subtle and manipulative, with few outright (so far, it's ongoing!) examples. I get a knot in my stomach every time I read and I LOVE IT.

DOG by Danceofthesevenveils

Another König fic that features a pathetic loser König, who is also one of the scariest motherfuckers I've ever read. The use of text messages underscores the creepy vibes, and a great vehicle for the Reader x König dynamic early on.

Desire Paths by @ceilidho

Manipulative best friend Johnny, you are iconic to me. Ceilidh writes some of the best nasty Johnny fic out there, but Desire Paths has my heart. Another ending that had me gasping.

Take Me Home, Country Road by @ceilidho

Cowboy Price, take me awayyyyyy. A fantastic Western AU focused on a Reader with a secret and a Sheriff Price that'll make you sit up straighter. Ceilidh captures John's voice so clearly, I can hear it when I read. That porch scene is seared into my brain in the best way.

Tender is the Flesh by @crashtestbunny

Do you like scary Simon? Do you like feeling unsettling and turned on? *slams table* Do I have the fic for you! Connie's butcher!Simon makes my blood run both hot and cold. "Oh she’s a stunner." lives in my head rent free. Also the apron tie bit.

Pornstar!AU by @shotmrmiller

Warning, if you don't smoke, you might start after reading Toni's porn AU. I love this depiction of Ghost, his control and his care. AND there's a threesome bit with Ghost x Reader x Price. It's what dreams are made of.

[shootingstarwritings]

Tag, you're it!

Some buddies of mine started this little group chat called, "Tag, you're it!" Since we're able to perform the possession spell, more details on that story later, we've been messing around with it. We're all either gay or bi, so we generally try and take over some sexy man and show off for the rest of the guys.

Last night, Juliet posted a picture of herself in her dad's body, showing off a nice and sexy selfie for all of us to drool over.

The caption read, "Tag, you're it, Shawn. Give us something y'know we'll like ;)"

It was gonna be tough to top that, but I was confident. Luckily, my veteran uncle was staying over at our place for a few days, so this was the perfect opportunity.

I waited until my uncle went to take a bath to start my plan. The way my friends and I managed to do this was by melting down into some kind of slime and slithering inside our hosts. Luckily, being able to cling to surfaces and move with little sound made it easy to sneak up on our victims.

I easily slid under the door and slithered through the tiled floor. Steam filled the air as the hot bath had only recently been drawn. I heard the metal screech as my uncle turned the water off. "Mmm, nice and hot..." he muttered. His deep and velvety voice pushed me over the edge. I needed to be him, and I needed it now!

He was wearing a towel, covering my favorite point of atttack, but I didn't care. I leaped towards my uncle's crotch with little fear in my gooey heart. "What the FUUUUUCK?!" My uncle cried out as my slime slid under the towel and engulfed his dick and balls, already slithering inside. He let out a moan as he fell backward onto the ground.

Legs spread out as though I was fucking him, my uncle squirmed and convulsed on the ground as I took him over. Slowly, as my slime invaded each cell of his body, I felt the disorienting yet still pleasurable sensation of having something slither inside of my borrowed form. I was not only stealing my uncle's body, but also his experiences.

It truly was like something was both sucking me off and fucking me at the same time. My uncle's thighs, soon to be my thighs, quivered in anticipation. My core tightened as I pumped more and more of myself into him. Then, as his panicked consciousness slowly faded into dormancy, I cried out as I finally climaxed all over myself. Ropes of cum splashed all over my chest, some shots even landing on my drooling face.

"WOAH! Ohhh... oh that's good..." I muttered, chuckling as I felt my adam's apple bounce. Mmm, you're such as sexy-ass man, uncle Roger..." I said. Getting up on my uncle's now sore legs, I stumble over to the mirror and admired myself.

"Hmm... good thing Shawn's enjoying himself in his room. Otherwise, he might see his sexy uncle playing with himself." I said, smirking at my little roleplay. "Oh yeah..." I threw away the towel and let my manhood flop around. "No point covering up this li'l fella, right? Gotta let the whole world see." I was about to step out until I saw the hot bath out of the corner of my eye. I grinned as my uncle's dick grew hard again.

"I drew this bath for myself, might as well enjoy it. I deserve it, after all." I stepped into the water and let out a deep groan. Taking a picture for the group chat could wait. For now, I just wanted to get to know my uncle with the help of some soap and water.

[sydsaint]

My sweet himbo, I love you <3

Summary: With his tag match against Tony D and Stacks looming, Bron looks to an old friend to help deal with Tony's cousin Adriana.

It's chaos at the end of NXT's weekly taping. Bron and Baron are fresh off a win against Chase University and about to head backstage when Tony D'Angelo and Stacks attack them.

Baron handles Tony inside the ring and leaves Bron to go after Stacks. Breakker chases Tony's lackey around the ring, quickly gaining on the smaller man.

"Woah! Hold on there big guy." Suddenly Tony's cousin, Adriana Rizzo, steps into Bron's path, forcing Breakker to come to a halt.

"Move out of the way!" Bron glares down at Adriana as Stacks hides behind her.

Adriana stands her ground and shield Stacks from Bron's wrath. "I don't think so, big fella." She insists with a smug laugh. "You want, Stacks? Then you's gon have to go through me."

Bron huffs an annoyed sigh and stares at Stacks over Adriana's shoulder. But Breakker knows better then to put his hands on a woman. Even if it is just to move her out of the way.

In the ring, Tony escapes from Baron after getting a few hits in and regroups with his so-called, family. The trio all group up at the bottom of the ramp and laugh at Baron and Bron.

"Enjoy those belts while you still can boys!" Tony taunts the pair. "Because you ain't gonna have them for much longer."

Bron joins Baron in the ring and the pair lock eyes with Stacks and Tony. Aggressive glares are exchanged before Stacks and Tony head back up the ramp with Adriana between them and the champs.

Once they are out of sight, Bron and Baron head back up the ramp as well with their titles in hand.

"Man! What the hell happened out there, Bron?" Corbin confronts Bron back in the locker room. "I thought you had Stacks?" He asks Breakker.

"Tony's cousin stepped in my way." Bron explains. "I was gonna spear the idiot through the barricade. But what was I supposed to do? Take the girl out with him?" He huffs in frustration.

Corbin groans and rubs his head. "You should have called her bluff, man." He insists. "She would have moved out of the way."

"And if she didn't?" Bron protests. "Come on man. I don't put my hands on women." He reminds Corbin. "And neither do you. So don't act like you'd of done something, Baron." He adds.

Corbin sighs but nods. "Yeah, you're right." He grits his teeth. "It's bullshit! How are we supposed to teach Tony and Stacks a lesson if they're just going to hide behind Ariana from now on?" He complains.

"I don't suppose you've got a convenient cousin laying around?" Bron jokes to lighten the mood.

"Hey, you're from the wrestling family." Baron chuckles. "I should be asking you that question."

Bron laughs with Corbin then an idea pops into his head. "Well, I don't have any cousins. But I do have a friend that might be willing to help us out." He suggests to Corbin. "She's a Smackdown superstar, has been for a while. But we've been friends for a long time."

"Yeah?" Baron perks up a bit at the prospect of the Adriana problem being an easy fix. "Who is it? Anyone I might know?" He asks Bron.

"Depends." Bron shrugs. "You know a, YN LN?" He asks Corbin.

Baron chokes on his spit at the mention of your name and begins shaking his head. "Her? Bron, hell no!" he protests. "That woman is pure evil! You're friends with her?" He looks at Bron in disbelief.

"So you have met, YN." Bron chuckles. "She's not that bad, Corbin. And like I said, we're old friends." He adds. "I'll give her a call and see if she can meet us before the next taping starts in a few hours." Bron pulls out his phone. "She lives nearby and shouldn't be traveling for Smackdown right now."

Corbin begrudgingly nods and watches Bron dial your number. He watches Breakker have a brief conversation that sounds friendly enough for a few minutes. Bron hangs up the phone a few minutes later with a satisfied smile and nods to Corbin.

"She's on her way." Bron smiles to himself, mentally patting himself on the back for his quick thinking.

"Great." Corbin grumbles to himself. "Invite the devil to our locker room why don't you." He huffs.

Bron laughs at Corbin's foul mood and pats his friend on the arm. "Man, what did YN do to you?" He asks Corbin.

"She hasn't done anything to me personally." Corbin replies. "But I've seen that girl make grown men run away from her. She's scary." He shudders.

"That ain't the YN I know." Bron replies. "The YN I know is a total sweetheart. Yeah, she can be a little manipulative. But she's always had my back when I've needed someone in my corner." He smiles to himself.

Corbin raises a brow at Bron, sensing that there might be some lingering feelings for you on Breakker's part. "So, were the two of you like a thing? Or?" He asks Bron.

"Me and YN? Nah, I never managed to work up the courage to ask her out. Like you said, she's intimidating." Breakker laughs at himself.

Around an hour later a knock sounds at the door and Bron jumps to answer it. Baron watches cautiously as Bron answers the door and you step into the locker room.

"Bron! How's my favorite himbo doing?" You bounce into the room and instantly go in for a hug.

"YN!" Bron happily pulls you in for a hug and shuts the door at the same time. "I've been good. Tag champs now with Corbin here. Which is why I called you up." He explains.

You let go of Bron and turn your head to the other side of the room where Corbin is sitting. "Baron." You greet him dryly.

"Hey, YN. Nice to see you again." Baron nods at you in a friendly but clearly nervous manner.

"Tag champs, huh? Nice going, Bron!" You turn back to Bron with a cheeky smile. "Now. What can I help you and baldy with?" You ask him.

Bron laughs at your shot against Corbin and explains the situation with Tony and his fam. You listen carefully and nod along with everything Bron is explaining. He finishes up his explanation and you nod.

"So Tony thinks that he can use his cousin to get a one-up on my boy for his title belt, huh?" You rise to your feet and crack your knuckles. "Well, we can't have that, now can we? I assume that you two can get Tony and Stacks back out to the ring?" You ask Bron.

"Yeah, shouldn't be a problem." Bron nods.

You nod and roll your shoulder to loosen them up. "Perfect. You two get the two stooges out in the ring and ready to rumble. And I'll make sure that Miss Rizzo ain't a problem this time." You grin to yourself.

Bron and Corbin do as told and head out to the ring when NXT's next taping starts. Tony and Stacks come out to the ring to confront the champs, but Adriana isn't with them. A fight breaks out after some harsh words are exchanged and the pair are able to dispatch Tony and Stacks this time.

"I wonder how YN faired." Corbin asks Bron once Tony and Stacks are retreating from their beating.

As if on cue, you drag Adriana out to the top of the ramp by the air. She kicks and screams but you don't let up on her. "Hey! Tony D!" You catch D'Angelo's attention. "You think you can get your cousin to help you beat on on my man? Fuck no!" You yank Adriana up by the hair. "Try some cheap shit like that again and Adriana here won't be walking right for the rest of her sorry excuse for a career. Caphiche?" You make fun of his accent as the cherry on top.

You let Adriana go for Tony and Stacks to collect. They rush up the ramp to help their girl and you walk past them to the ring. You head up the stairs and slip into the ring with Corbin and Bron.

"Well." You gesture to the top of the ramp with a self-satisfied smile. "I don't think that she'll be a problem for you boys again." You laugh. "But just in case the bitch didn't learn her lesson, I'll stick around for a couple of weeks."

"Thanks, YN." Bron grins and slings an arm over your shoulder playfully. "I knew that I could count on you."

You giggle and hug his side. "Oh, anything for you, Bron." You joke. "Corbin. Close your mouth man." You add with snark when you notice Baron's jaw hanging ajar.

"Right." Corbin coughs. "Sorry, YN."

[munson-blurbs]

@corrodedcoffinfest Day 3: Best Friends

Word Count: 756/Rating: M/Pairing: None/CW: canon-compliant, bullying, violence/Tags: Eddie Munson, Gareth, Grant, Jeff, Jason Carver, Andy, Patrick McKinney, Lucas Sinclair, Gareth's POV, canon dialogue used throughout

Divider credit to @silkholland

Eddie Munson is not a punctual person, but he’s always on time for two things: Hellfire Club meetings and band practice. 

So when he’s nowhere to be found nearly fifteen minutes after practice is supposed to start, Gareth can’t help but worry. 

“Maybe we should just start without him?” Jeff offers shyly, unsure if it’s the right call or not. 

Grant shakes his head. “We’ll give him another five minutes. Maybe he got pulled over again.”

Gareth nods, but his insides churn. Something is wrong. He can feel it. 

That sense of dread is confirmed when Jason Carver, Patrick McKinney, and Andy Shay make their way up to the garage. 

Gareth notices them first, bringing his drumming to an abrupt end. Jeff and Grant go still when they see what caused him to stop playing. 

Fear catches in Gareth’s throat. He’s never had a pleasant interaction with any of them. Every conversation has ended with mockery or the jocks shoving him to the ground. 

That was how Gareth had met Eddie—the former had been pushed into a locker by Andy, seeing stars as his books fell to the ground. Eddie stopped to help him, saw his notebook filled with angsty song lyrics and DnD-inspired doodles, and the rest was history. 

“Who’re you?” Gareth asked, finding his balance to stand up. 

Eddie just grinned. “Your new best friend.”

Now, Gareth ignores the hammering in his chest as he steps out from behind his drum set. 

“A little early, fellas,” he says, hoping his confident stride hides his nervousness. “Show’s not till next week.”

“Oh, that was music you were playing?” Andy smirks. 

Jason wastes no time in explaining the reason for their surprise visit. “We’re looking for Eddie Munson,” he says sharply. “He’s in this band…if that’s what you can even call this.”

“What d’you care?” If Jason is looking for Eddie, it certainly isn’t to form some jock-freak truce. Not with the fire blazing in Jason’s eyes. 

“That’s our business.” Jason snaps back. 

Before Gareth can answer, his eyes lock onto a familiar, reluctant face. 

“Lucas? What’re you doing with these douchebags?”

Trepidation washes over Lucas’s face. “We’re just trying to find Eddie, man.”

“Well, you have eyes, don’t you? He’s not here.” And I’ll be damned if you get any information out of me, he thinks. If the roles were reversed, Eddie would shield Gareth from whatever wrath the jocks wanted to unleash. 

Jason nods, the information processing, and Gareth lets himself relax. Okay, he’ll leave now. Whatever crusade they’re on, it’s—

Knuckles connect with Gareth’s cheek, stunning him. He wills himself to stay standing, aided by Jeff and Grant propping him back up. 

Jason’s fingers dig into the fabric of Gareth’s vest. “Where is he?”

“I don’t know!”

“WHERE IS HE?!”

“I DON’T KNOW!”

There’s another frustrated punch, this time to his stomach. As he doubles over, he sees that Andy and Patrick have cornered his friends. 

I gotta help them; I gotta stop this—

A muscled arm wraps around his neck, pulling him into a headlock. He fights to get out, the two grappling for dominance, but Gareth knows it’s all over when Jason flings him into the drum set. The cymbal echoes, an ironic bit of finality. 

Pain sears through his hand as Jason’s sneakered foot presses it deeper into the carpet. He keeps one hand on Gareth’s head, holding him in place as he bellows, “it’s gonna be hard to play those drums with a broken hand!”

Gareth lets out a guttural scream. Eddie wouldn’t crack, he knows. Eddie would protect him, come hell or high water. Eddie had protected him. 

But it’s too much, and he can feel his bones aching under Jason’s foot. It hurts—it hurts—it fucking hurts—

“DUSTIN!” Shame courses through Gareth’s veins as the name leaves his lips. 

Confusion seeps through Jason’s rage. “What?”

“DUSTIN HENDERSON! DUSTIN HENDERSON!” Shut up stop talking but it fucking hurts… “He was callin’ around, looking for Eddie.” You coward, ratting out your best friend. “Maybe he found him. Maybe he found…”

Jason lets out a soft scoff. “That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

He steps off of Gareth’s fingers, but it does nothing to alleviate the weight of Gareth’s guilt. Pathetic. Eddie’s your best friend. He would never cower like you did. You let him down. You let everyone down. 

The jocks say something else before they leave, but Gareth doesn’t register any of it. He can only hope that his gutlessness won’t come back to haunt him—or his best friend. 

--

[chlorinatedpopsicle]

https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-023-02717-0

In an online survey of 1124 heterosexual British men using a modified CDC National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey, 71% of men experienced some form of sexual victimization by a woman at least once during their lifetime.

If men would like male sexual victimization to be taken more seriously, maybe they should start by not responding to news about instances of male sexual victimization with jokes and/or "he's so lucky!!" comments. I'm sure you already know what I'm talking about, but here's a small example:

I don't know about you, but I never see women making “I got raped by a priest” jokes, “don't drop the soap” jokes, or “fellas, how would you react if you found her? [picture of unconscious or dead woman]” jokes, etc. I only ever see men and boys doing that, strangely enough. Until men and boys stop doing that all the fucking time, I'm gonna find it hard to sympathize with their plight.

The study examines how men may feel discouraged from speaking out about instances of sexual victimization because – as a result of male socialization and male gender expectations – they are afraid of showing any emotional weakness / vulnerability; men may see any display of emotional distress as emasculating. This is true. However, one has to ask: who are the ones who perpetuate these male gender expectations in the first place? Who are the ones pushing these ideas of masculine stoicism; the idea that men mustn't show weakness? In case you've been living under a rock, liberal women have been encouraging men to show more emotional vulnerability for decades now. Liberal women push the “men's mental health matters!!! male SA victims are valid!!!” stuff harder than anyone, even MRAs. Just as men are the ones making the rape jokes, these masculine gender expectations are taught and upheld almost entirely by men. They created the stigma all on their own.

Anyway, let's address the elephant in the room: 71% is a big number! I have to wonder, though, how many of the reported sexual victimization incidents were rape, and how many were things like unwanted sexual comments, groping, and leering. Those things are definitely distressing and even psychologically damaging, but nobody should deny that they are not on the same level as sexual assault – something experienced by a staggeringly high number of women and girls. Anyway, here it is:

As I expected, forced penetration (what I would consider rape) doesn't make up a whole lot of that percentage. If you want, you can scroll through some of the tags on my blog to see how statistics for female SA victims differ. Well, probably. Tumblr's tagging system is finicky.

I'm sorry, but I'd rather focus my concern on the things that men are doing. Like mass-scale sex trafficking and prostitution. And violent pornography. And spycam terrorism / voyeuristic porn / deepfake porn. And forced child marriage and bride kidnapping. And barring girls from going to school. And female genital mutilation. And forcing women to wear head-coverings and then brutally assaulting and arresting them if they don't comply. And constant femicides. And "honor" killings. And incestuous rape and sexual abuse at horrifying rates. And brutal domestic violence. And every war in the history of humanity (and all the violence that war entails). And committing over 90% of violent crimes. And raping the female patients in their care. And raping babies and corpses and animals like it's nobody's business. And other quirky male activities. Thanks for the ask!

[toh-tagteam-au]

Status Update and Warning of a Synopsis Drop

Gonna keep it a stack w yall fellas. I've written over 100 parts of this comic spanning all of the episodes (over 300 pages using 9 point font on google docs) and im realizing theres No Way I'm gonna be able to get my motivation to draw as much as I did for TT back when I first started, much less finish the thing. Much less actually GET to YBOS, which is when the canon deviance legit starts and the story gets way more interesting imo.

So here's what's going to happen:

I'm going to stop drawing the comic. As much as I really like the idea of finishing this particular scene, I know I'm not gonna be able to do it. I haven't updated consistently for months – this is the end of my line here.

BUT

I'm going to write the whole story in its own post WITH VISUALS. I'll explain what happens in every episode over the course of all the seasons, maybe even include some of my favorite visuals/boards when I was writing them. I'll also probs have some deleted concepts in a separate post (because damn I went through some rewrites when season 2b dropped). I'll consider dropping the script too, so you guys can see the actual lines I wrote for each part, but that's a big "if".

Don't get me wrong, I'll still be active (probably more active than I have been in the past few months LMAOOOO). I'm just shifting this AU story away from a comic medium and into a Tumblr AU medium, like how a lot of the TOH aus are at the moment. I want to tell this story and give you guys content, and if i have to do it without the art medium then I will.

I am so grateful you guys have stuck around. The compliments on this comic – my art, the story, literally everything – mean everything to me. I hope you guys like the Tag Team synopsis when I post it.

[rottingmelancholycake]

Introduction!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~🖤🍰~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[[[ Heya! I'm Mars, (They/them prns please) and I got struck with the Dandy's world brainrot, so here I am with a blog for my favorite toon Cosmo!! Except he's twisted and sad of course. ]]]

HEY UM I'M A MINOR. Don't be weird around me.

This is also my first time making a blog/using tumblr in general! Please be patient towards me :]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~🖤🍰~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

DNI: Pedophiles, Zoophiles, homophobes 18+ suggestive etc. Don't be a NSFW blog either. basically, don't be a weirdo. ASKS:

ASKS ARE USALLY ALWAYS OPEN.

I'll post something when they close or when their back open!

You can ask these!:

SPECIFIC LORE RELATED QUESTIONS. If they get too lore things, i'll throw a devious /ooc and cackle /lh

You can ask to interract with Cosmo, like give him hugs, sweets, heavy objects he may not like all of it though.

Feel free to curse Cosmo with anything, i'll set a curse limit for 20 asks maximum. (For example, you can curse Cosmo to make him only speak backwards lol. Go wild! M!a s are really cool too...

When Cosmo does a action, his text would start out with [🖤🍰]

Ask me, Mars!! My text will be in this green colour :] (NO NSFW ASKS WITH ME NEITHER OR WEIRD STUFF AND ESPIALLY DONT SHIP ME WITH NOX EW. )

Please don't ask these:

ANY NSFW OR SUGGESTIVE THINGS. Big no.

Please no romantic things. You can ask Cosmo to give you a hug (Maybe) but no more then that.

THIS IS TEMPORARY!! But please no roleplays with Cosmo yet. The only account i'll be roleplaying with for now is @melancholichugs. I'll be sure to notice ya'll if things would change though!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~🖤🍰~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I DO NOT SUPPORT ANY OF THE PAST CO-DEV OF DANDY'S WORLD (aka Rox's) ACTIONS.

This blog won't have much ship stuff going on really, but it does have implied fruitcake (Sprout x Cosmo!!) You won't be seeing like much sprout AT ALL though so. Feel free to ask Cosmo about Sprout (or any other toons really)

ABSOUTELY DO NOT SHIP MY COSMO AND @melancholichugs's GOOB TOGETHER. They see eachother as CLOSE FRIENDS. (Platonic, even!!)

A FEW WARNINGS. This blog will include:

Lots of gore

Character death (?)

Cannabalisim

Se!f H34M

I will of course give warnings to these! Please proceed with caution...

OF COURSE I would love to thank my lovely friend and QPP Nox (Aka @melancholichugs owner for deciding to make a duo blog with me... I will do lots of art for their blog and in exchange theyre gonna do lots of writing for mine! Were a power duo fr.... 💚

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~🖤🍰~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HASHTAGS:

#🖤🍰- The Ex-Baker snarls. (Cosmo responds to basic asks!) ||

#🩹🍰 - Cosmo explores. (Normal posts) ||

# ❤🍩- Confused Gargling. (Cosmo interracts with other blogs!) ||

# 💙🍰- Joy with the hugger. (Cosmo interracts/mentions @melancholichugs's Goob!) ||

#💔🍓🍰- Pained sobbing. (Cosmo interracts/mentions Sprout.) ||

# ‼🍪 - Confused screeching. (Cosmo interracts with normal toons.) ||

#💔🤎🎂 - TEAR MY HEART OUT. LET IT BLEED. (Cosmo remembers past events. This is also the lore tag!) ||

#🤎🍰 - Rotting Cake. (Cosmo..GETS CURSED??) ||

#💔‼ - Despair and screaming. (This is the tag for the trigger warnings above.) ||

#💚🐉 - The planetary gremlin yaps (Mars speaks!) ||

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~🖤🍰~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

EXTRA STUFF

(TW FOR ICHOR)

But yeah heres Cosmo's design!!! silly..

FEEL FREE TO DRAW HIM!! I love fanart..

Welp..Thats basically all! Hope ya'll enjoy fellas :]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~🖤🍰~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[talshiargirlfriend]

This instalment of spy-ay-ay-ay ✨vibes✨ for @candiedsumire snowballed on me, so let me sell you on it real quick: family banter, chocolate, an impassioned speech, Vulcan jokes, only one bed, and a dose of mutual pining. 2.8K words to use 2 lines. Can you pick them out?

Thank you @deadheaddaisy for talking me off the ledge 🥰🥰🥰

also tagging @iamstartraveller776 for a reason which will be clear about 370-some words in 😅

Follows immediately from the previous post here

—

Maybe he had been overthinking because things certainly started off well enough. His parents met them on the walkway in front of the house with smiles. 

Trip stepped up to make introductions. “T’Pol, I’d like you to meet my parents Elaine Meyer and James Tucker. Mom, Dad, this is T’Pol.”

He had no time to second guess whether he should have included her rank or called her his girlfriend as immediately his parents each raised a hand in a pair of very passable Vulcan salutes. 

“Peace and long life,” Elaine said in choppy Vulcan while her husband stood beside her proudly.

“Live long and prosper,” T’Pol responded in kind. 

After a brief pause, Elaine continued in English, “Sorry, I don’t know much more than that. Welcome to our home, T’Pol. We’re very pleased to meet you.” 

T’Pol gracefully moved her hand down to shake first Trip’s mother’s hand and then his father’s. 

“Thank you for your hospitality. It is agreeable to meet you, Ms Meyer and Mr Tucker.” 

“Please, call me Elaine,” his mother spoke at the same time his father insisted, “It’s Jimmy, please!”

“Oh, you’re gonna have to work for that one, Dad. It took me months to get her to call me Trip.” 

His parents exchanged an amused glance and led the way into the house.

Trip decided to press his luck a little, “and we were on kissing terms by then, right sweetheart?” She didn’t roll her eyes, but it really looked like she wanted to and that was good enough for him. 

As they followed his parents through the front door she paused and gave him a quizzical look. 

“What?”

“Perhaps I have misapprehended the nature of your nickname,” she said in a hushed tone. “Your father is not named Charles?”

“Oh.” Trip had a brief flash of panic. If it hadn’t occurred to him to tell her this, what if he’d forgotten something important?

“Trip?” she prompted. 

“Nah, you’ve got it right. I’m the third Charles Tucker, but I’m named after my grandad and my uncle.”

Jimmy overheard that and added, “Our oldest son is named Bert after Lainey’s dad, but then my brother Charlie and his wife Maggie had three daughters in four years and decided they were done having kids—”

“My cousins Daisy, Aster, and Violet - you’ll meet them tomorrow,” Trip interjected. 

“So when this fella came along after that we decided he should carry on the family name.”

T’Pol looked between the two men. “I see.”

“That’s her ‘humans are strange and illogical’ face. I see that one a lot,” Trip joked. 

“Maybe that’s because you personally are strange and illogical, son,” his mama chimed in. 

Jimmy chuckled, and T’Pol’s lips twitched. 

“Ha. Ha. Isn’t it nice to be home,” Trip groused. 

Ignoring his put-upon tone, Elaine patted his cheek. “It’s real good to have you home, baby. Why don’t you two go put your things away and get settled, and then we’ll have dinner.” 

Jimmy led them upstairs. “You two are in here,” he said, pushing a bedroom door open.

And that’s when they saw the one large bed filling the space. They’d be able to walk around it fine, but his plan of sleeping on the floor was right out. 

“Oh wow, new bed,” Trip said weakly. 

His dad winked - actually freaking winked - at him and said, “With you kids getting older and starting to bring home spouses and kids, we thought this room needed an upgrade. I’ll see you two downstairs for dinner.” 

Once he had departed, Trip eyed T’Pol warily. “Looks like we’ll be sharing a bed.” 

She responded with typical Vulcan pragmatism. “Then there will be no reason for you to suffer back pain. Which side would you prefer?” 

He stared at her for a second before placing his bag down to claim his side. She was either completely unaffected by the thought of sharing a bed with him or she was enjoying his discomfort. Maybe both. 

After a moment T’Pol spoke without looking up from the personal items she was unpacking. “I was concerned my being Vulcan would cause you some difficulty with your family. I am pleased that doesn’t seem to be the case.” 

“Nah, I mean it’s definitely unusual, but they’ve always been pretty supportive of me finding my own way in the world. And what’s not to like about you? Plus Mom has Vulcan colleagues - friends, even, at the university. Hell, it sounded like Dad was on board before I even called. If anything, I’m more worried someone’ll make an embarrassing sex joke or ask when we’re getting married… but you’re trained to handle ‘offensive situations’ and I grew up with it.” He smirked. 

“I do not think my family would be as welcoming,” she said quietly. She sounded almost sad. 

“Well, it takes some people a little longer to come around. Our project and the joint missions to follow could really help with that. Are you close to your family?”

“Not particularly. My mother is often concerned about my erratic behavior,” T’Pol said drily. 

Trip looked at her suspiciously. “You’re not joking?”

She shook her head slightly in the negative.

“You’re a loose cannon? A Vulcan black sheep? My girl’s a rebel.” He looked at her salaciously, “T’Pol, that’s kinda hot.” 

She gave him a long-suffering look, but there was no longer a trace of sadness on her face as she followed him to dinner. 

Shortly after they all sat down at the table a blonde tornado blew in. “Sorry I’m late! Hi Mama! Daddy, is that the spicy pasta? It smells delicious! Oh, Trip! I’m so glad you made it!” 

She paused then and took a breath. 

“You must be T’Pol,” she continued in a much more dignified manner. “I’m Elizabeth Tucker, and I’m very pleased to meet you.” 

“It is agreeable to meet you, Ms Tucker.” 

Elizabeth’s ponytail swung wildly as she shook her head, “No, don’t get up on my account! I’m just gonna go wash up and I’ll be right back!”

“So that’s Lizzie,” Trip said into the silence that followed. 

“Takes after her mama,” Jimmy grinned. 

“And her brother,” T’Pol added almost inaudibly. 

Elaine and Trip shared a mock offended look and then she shrugged. “All my babies are brilliant and beautiful. I’m happy to take the credit.” 

Elizabeth returned, and dinner continued. They chatted about Lizzie’s new job, progress on the technology integration project, the fact that Trip’s mom and T’Pol’s mom worked in anthropology and cultural history respectively - small universe! - and Captain Jefferies’s excellent recovery among other topics. Trip found himself relaxing and enjoying himself. 

“T’Pol, I’m not sure how to ask this and I promise I intend no offense…” Elaine began.

Trip felt his stomach clench. So much for relaxing.

“You seem more … personable, I suppose, than most of my Vulcan colleagues. That could be personal preference or generational difference, and I don’t mean to imply that you’ve been too casual! Or that they’re too formal! I just … I don’t want you to feel like you have to try too hard with us. We want you to be comfortable here.” 

“There is no offense where none is taken. As Trip’s chosen partner, I do wish to make a favourable impression on you, and I appreciate your efforts to ensure my comfort,” T’Pol replied. “However, I believe what you have noticed is the result of my cultural training prior to joining the technology integration project. Captain Stenn impressed upon our team the logic of observing and adapting to certain human cultural norms, as he believed this would facilitate cooperation and yield more productive results.”

“Your cultural sensitivity training must’ve been a lot more interesting than ours. We pretty much got taught the ta’al and reminded not to talk with our mouths full,” Trip chuckled. 

“I don’t know, T’Pol,” Jimmy said with a twinkle in his eye. “Maybe you’re just a charmer. The handshake thing…?”

“Slick, right?” Trip exclaimed. “Like a choreographed dance move. I knew I was in trouble the minute I met her and she pulled that on me.” 

“Well, she’s certainly charmed Trip,” Lizzie added as she looked between her brother and his apparent partner in amusement. 

“Hey, I’ve charmed her, too,” Trip defended himself.

All eyes swivelled to T’Pol, who somewhat reluctantly confirmed, “He has made a positive impression.”

Trip shot her a cheeky grin, “and you think I’m funny, too.”

“I will allow you to persist in that belief because it makes you happy.”

“All right, fine,” Trip said over the laughter of his family. “If I’m gonna be mocked by all and sundry, I should at least get some dessert to console me.”

He looked at his mother hopefully, “Did I hear you mention cheesecake?”

“That’s for tomorrow, but I did make brownies — egg and dairy free.”

Lizzie clasped her hands together in delight and leaned toward T’Pol, “Mama only bakes for special occasions. Her brownies are so good!”

Trip stood up to clear away the dinner dishes and his mother followed suit.  T’Pol moved to join them, but he waved her off with a smile, “I’ve got it. I’ll see what tea they’ve got since you’re not big on coffee.”  

Once dessert was finished, T’Pol excused herself for evening meditation. 

A few minutes later Trip gestured vaguely, “I’m just gonna go check on T’Pol and see if she needs anything. Be right back.” 

His parents exchanged a knowing look. 

“Goodnight, son,” his dad called to his retreating back. 

Trip knocked on the bedroom door so he wouldn’t startle T’Pol. He’d seen how fast she could react to a threat and sneaking up on her was likely to get him pinned down with her arm against his throat and … Whoa, easy there.  He shook his head to clear it. 

“Come in.”

She sat on the end of the bed in her snug t-shirt and loose pants pajamas looking just slightly … spacey. 

“Hey, I don’t want to interrupt your quiet time. Just wanted to make sure you're ok.”

“I’m fine,” she answered too quickly. 

He narrowed his eyes. “What’s wrong?”

“Chocolate has a … mildly intoxicating effect on Vulcan physiology,” she answered grudgingly. 

Well, that was news to Trip! He grinned, “So you’re tipsy?”

She glared. “Slightly. I have been trained to act while under the influence of a variety of intoxicants and will continue to perform any necessary duties that may arise,” she assured him. 

She’d retreated into formality and couldn’t seem to settle on a focal point when looking at his face, so yeah, she was definitely a little drunk. 

“Of course. Never doubted you… you look a little wobbly though.”

“Your sister was very insistent that I share a second slice with her. I did not believe it would cause any difficulties. However, the effect was slightly more potent than I anticipated.” T’Pol sounded almost apologetic.

Trip winced, “Yeah, uh… Mom told me she accidentally added the cocoa twice and was really relieved the brownies still tasted all right.”

T’Pol tilted her head adorably. “Then it appears my initial judgment was sound. I simply failed to anticipate the… human element. I will not repeat that error.” 

“So, is there anything I can do? You need water or a cup of tea? Want me to get out of your hair? I can go sleep on the couch and say I was snoring—“

“No! That will not be necessary.”

“Ok, then what do you need?”

She looked so reluctant to answer it tugged at his heart. 

He sat down beside her. “Come on, T’Pol. You’ve done so much for me. Tell me how I can help you.”

“I have simply done my duty to the best of my abilities,” she deflected softly. 

He snorted. “Duty is getting the sensor and engine upgrades going. Watching my back is duty. Calming me down when Matt was rushed to the hospital? Watching silly movies with me? Coming here with me and charming the pants off my folks? Honey, we’re way past duty. Maybe you think you’re just really good at your job and maintaining cover - and you are - but you’re also … you’re really good at being my best friend. We’re in this together. And you and me? We make a hell of a team. So whatever you need right now, I’ve got you. Okay?”

She looked at him, emotion pooling in her dark expressive eyes until she blinked it away. Her brow creased like she was considering something. 

“Since we are in no immediate danger, the most sensible course of action would be to rest and allow my body to metabolise the toxins naturally.”

He nodded, and she continued, “Normally I would meditate to calm my mind before sleep, but the effects are making it difficult to achieve the desired state of mind. However, I believe listening to a familiar voice could provide a grounding effect.”

It took him a moment to hear the request in her words. “So, you want me to stay here and talk to you?” he checked. 

“If it is not an inconvenience.” 

“It’s not. But even if it was, I would gladly be inconvenienced if it made things easier for you.” A little embarrassed by his own vehemence, he stood abruptly. “Just gonna change and brush my teeth.”

When he returned she was sitting exactly as he’d left her, listing slightly to one side. 

“You sure you’re gonna be able to sleep next to a smelly human?” he teased. 

She made a show of sniffing the air in jest. Something indecipherable passed across her face. It wasn’t disgust, but whatever it was disappeared in a blink as she leaned back, gripping the bedcover tightly. 

“Your scent is not offensive to me, Trip.” 

Before he could work out how to respond to that, she’d moved up the bed and curled up on her side, closing her eyes. 

Trip followed suit and laid on his back with his hands tucked behind his head. He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, “So is hitting the chocolate and shacking up with boys the kind of erratic behaviour your mom worries about?” 

T’Pol frowned slightly. “When word of our pairing reached Vulcan, she told me to expect a formal communique regarding the dissolution of my betrothal. She was not pleased.”

Trip was stunned. He really didn’t like the idea of causing problems for her. Or the idea of her having a fiancé, for that matter. 

“You’re engaged? he spluttered as he turned to face her fully. “Is this- am I causing you trouble?” 

She waved a hand in dismissal without even opening her eyes. “It is a formality. I was issued an ultimatum regarding my betrothal prior to accepting assignment on Earth.  I preferred a position on the integration team over marriage to Koss. Activation of my secondary assignment - our situation - simply makes me more undesirable. Thus the ‘greetings t’sai’ letter.”

His jaw dropped. “Was that a ‘Dear John’ joke?” he asked incredulously. 

She looked pleased with herself. 

“Well, I’m glad you think it’s funny! Geez, T’Pol. I thought I’d ruined your whole life!”

She didn’t quite snort. “Hardly.” After a moment she added, “I may be divulging too much information in my inebriated state.” 

“Not from my perspective, and you know I’ll keep your secrets, but we can talk about something else.” 

Trip settled onto his back again and rambled on with occasional replies from T’Pol. He talked about how glad he was to have met her, his opinions about the upcoming Vulcan-Starfleet mission, how he would improve the sensor installation prior to testing, and a rundown of the various family members she might meet at Lizzie’s graduation party the following day.  

After a quiet minute he thought she’d fallen asleep until she suddenly whispered his name rather intently. 

For a horrible second he thought she was going to tell him she needed to vomit. He turned on his side to face her. “Yeah?”

“You have a very interesting face,” she told him, staring at said face for a moment and raising her hand in his direction slightly before tucking it under her pillow and closing her eyes again. 

“Okaaaay,” he laughed. “Thanks, I guess?”

“I don’t think I’d get tired of looking at it,” she mumbled sleepily. 

By the time he could process the thought what does that mean? he realised she was actually asleep this time. 

He looked at her peaceful features, grateful she felt safe enough to let her guard down with him. After a moment he became aware he might be moving past friendly affection toward something like longing and turned away before he could reach creepy staring territory. 

He let the steady sound of her breathing behind him soothe him until he hit on another realisation: he’d been joking around with his dad before, but he might really be in trouble here. 

[vintagestagehotties]

FAQ

Welcome to the vintage theatre showdown! The Vintage Theatre Actress Tournament to determine the hotness of vintage theatre ladies will begin Saturday, April 13. Submissions are currently closed! Hot male actors will come soon, but I’m in a ladies mood at the moment.

Can I currently submit hotties?

Submissions for hot fellas are CLOSED.

How long will the finals last?

The semifinals will begin on Saturday, November 9th and last one week.

What are the criteria for contestants?

Your hottie must:

Have a significant theatre career - ie, more than two theatre credits to their name, have played leading or featured roles, won awards, etc.

Have had a decent chunk of their career take place pre-70s (ie if they made their stage debut in an ensemble in 1969 but then became famous in years to come, I’m not counting it). Similarly, a decent chunk of their career must have taken place post-1900 (ie if their last stage role ever was in February of 1900, not gonna count it).

Exceptions to the above will be accepted at my discretion - for example, maybe they only played one or two shows but earned a Tony Award. To take into account the racism of past theatre, exceptions will be made nearly always for the sake of inclusivity and diversity

What counts as theatre?

I am accepting performers from plays, musicals, revues, and operas. Other types of stage performers (for example, comedians and ballerinas) will be accepted on a case by case basis, provided a case could be made that their stage career involved a degree of acting. I’m accepting Broadway, West End, worldwide productions, tours, even regional theatre counts! One of my personal favorite submissions for the ladies tournament was a Peking opera performer!

What counts as vintage?

The timeline to be considered vintage for this tournament is 1900-1969. A fella can have a significant chunk of his career post 1970 or in the 19th century, but at least some of it has to be within this time frame.

Can I submit propaganda?

Yes! You can send propaganda to my asks or submissions, or you can tag me in reblogs or posts. However, I won’t be posting or reblogging any propaganda until the tournament starts except the posts I have queued to lead up to the tournament’s beginning.

What tags do you track?

I track the tags #vintagestagehotties and #vintagestagepoll

The #vintagestagepoll will be the tag for all of the polls, while #vintagestagehotties is for anything relating to the tournament.

Other tags include #propaganda, which is pretty self explanatory, #losers highlights, highlighting some of our performers who are gone but not forgotten, and #mini polls for fun miniature pools featuring our contestants.

Why did you use this photo/propaganda/etc…?

Propaganda is entirely submitted. I try to remain as impartial as possible and will simply post the propaganda that is submitted to me, however I will not use negative propaganda.

For photos I try to use the main photo submitted whenever possible. I try to make sure the photo is from the period that they were active on stage within the time frame (ex I didn’t use use a pic of Greer Garson from the 40s when she wasn’t doing any stage work, I didn’t use any pics of Sarah Bernhardt from before the 20th century, etc). Other than that I try to make sure that you can clearly see their face, it’s not too blurry, and there’s no watermarks (I have a watermark remover but if it doesn’t work I’ll use the image in propaganda and find a different main picture). I also prefer not to use pictures where stage makeup or wigs change their natural appearance too much.

If you dislike the photo used for an actress or actor, send me an alternative and I’ll see what I can do!

How will the pairs be selected?

For round 1, I pit similar decades against each other and then am more random in following rounds.

There is a lot of overlap between theatre stars and film stars, and a great many major vintage film stars had successful theatre careers as well. So, in order to avoid the last rounds turning into a hot movie star competition, early rounds will see the incredibly famous movie stars pitted against each other. This is in the spirit of fairness to give lesser known performers with only theatre careers more of a fighting chance.

Will there be future polls?

Yes! In addition to the poll for vintage stage men, I have a few others planned - vintage women in STEM is pretty definite, and I’m tossing around the idea of a silent film star poll, a vintage ballerina poll, a femme fatale poll, and a poll just for vintage opera stars. And to be honest there’s enough vintage stage women in the world that I could easily do a second tournament for them! And clearly I HAVE to do a Peter Pan actress poll in the very near future.

[tacky-optic]

Had a question about who our favorite Zenigata partner is in a server I'm in and now I can't stop thinking about them. Tis the zaza sickness.

anyway here's literally all of the characters Zenigata's been partnered with that i could find (within reason). if anyone wants to elaborate on any of these guys (cough yata cough) please feel free to go absolutely ham. *(obligatory spoiler warning for a whole lotta lupin specials, waow-- notably zenigata keibu since that's probably the most unwatched of everything i cover. but if youre here im guessing youre as unfortunately well-versed as i am so LETS FRIGGIN GET INTO IT)

Starting off nice n' mellow. I'm pretty neutral on Yata, tbh. I just think he's neat and it's easy enough to write him and not much else. I've rambled about him being a stand-in for the viewer before, but overall i just don't have all that many thoughts on the guy (seriously someone please do yata). ironic considering he's hands-down the most prevalent sidekick to date, but alas. head remains empty.

MARIYA. Mariya my girlie oh how i love thee. finally, someone with a Gimmick on par with Mr. my-sword-can-cut-anything. Plus she's super sweet and smart and sharp and just an all-around endearing character. AND SHE'S DIFFERENT!! she's tagging along with Zenigata of her OWN FREE WILL like gurl what are you THINKING. there isn't a shred of coherent interview material to draw from this man, especially about Lupin. The dynamic they end up developing is on point, though!! Zenigata's initial total miscall of it aside, It's just plain ol' wholesome. If Yata's his surrogate son than Mariya's obviously his daughter. No shot in hell they don't at least keep in contact after the special's done. plus her snapping a pic of him every time he eats shit is peak comedy journalism

MOTHAFUCKIN' MELON COP!! an absolutely magical reefer-smokin' shitbag, especially in the edgy Tokyopop translation. He's a great foil to our otherwise serious(ly neurotic) manga Zenigata. Not to mention the combative potential with a down the line Melon.... ough. A more toned-down "newer part"-esque Zeni getting slapped with an extremely smug and insistent reminder of his angstlord past is such a delicious concept to me. i will be using this guy extensively in that exact way one of these days-- he's too fun not to.

a bit of a sidenote but i've gotta point fingers at gray jacket again (can't recommend it enough) for having my favorite melon depiction in fic; walther recently had him show up in their fic secondhand vanity as well (which i also can't recommend enough), so needless to say i think he has some fun potential.

Sakuraba and Kunikida from the live-action show get honorable mentions, obviously. They're both so different yet learn so much from Zenigata all the same. As far as reacting to the inspector goes, they're the ideal Yatas (again i am so so sorry yata-- surely someone will do you justice). Even though they aren't technically "new" to the force they're new to the Zenigata Shenanigans, and that is where the entertainment factor is. Sakuraba's the traditionalist keibu method-doubter whereas Kunikida's this mousey blue around the gills fella, and over their respective case file appearances, they both gain faith in/learn confidence from Zenigata, respectively. It really is a great bit of development to watch play out.

I'm gonna count The Guys™️ as a collective group/formless mass with maybe one of the Guyest of Guys as Zenigata's right hand Guy, like that one dude in Cagliostro. Apparently the name he's given in one of the dubs is Sam?? That's neat. Sam's neat. for anyone interested in some homework, here's the link to the highly informative lupin forum thread i found that out from: [x]

But yeah the Guys! Right from the start, Zenigata having this army of inexplicably and absurdly loyal cops was always a fun trope and i love to see 'em whenever they show up. I had this idea ages ago for this fake documentary-style miniseries based around them-- all the usual Lupin nonsense goes on in the background while we get a peek at the typically unseen shenanigans happening on the law-bearing side. Getting assigned to the lupin taskforce is probably seen as some kind of punishment, but that just makes the camaraderie all the more tight-knit. There'd be some behind-the-scenes Zenigata/how he interacts with them, what they get up to on their own whack case assignments when they're in a Lupin sighting lull.... hell maybe we even learn why they're all so damn loyal to this one supposedly hyper-independent guy. I think it'd be fun but maybe that's just the Zenigata hopeful in me. Surely he's capable of building some semblance of rapport with the fine group of folks he drags around the world with him....

Let's just rip the band-aid off-- I dislike Oscar with a burning passion. which is weird, right? because i like Melon Cop, the dude who's totally cool with straight-up cold-blooded judge/jury/executioner-style murder. I dunno dude the obsessive daddy kink simping's just too feckin' weird for me. i checked the hell out so fast. If the goal was to make Oscar extremely disquieting, they friggin' did it. Granted he was written to be a bit whack from the start, and getting raised(?)/mentored by THAT Zenigata would irreversibly mess anyone up. I get that the fucked up-ness is part of the appeal, but man. How anyone can gravitate towards Oscar without heavily modifying his whole deal escapes me.

I've seen him written tolerably in fic maybe... twice? He's in gray jacket (there it is again!) and SMRO (needs no introduction nor explanation), so obligatory kudos to anyone who can wrangle [gestures vaguely at all of that].

Vicky though. Vicky Flannigan from Island of Assassins is so goddamn funny. Still can't believe they took one of the most badass Zenigata character designs and actively went out of their way to make him bedridden. I've seen folks call him "Proto-Yata" and. Yeah. Can't argue. He's a glorified babysitter, if anything, and the only reason he's even remotely effective is because he (accidentally) broke both of Zenigata's legs. Funniest shit istg

ICPO LADIES!!! They're cute. Designs could be better but it's Babylon yknow. Despite being an admittedly fun romp, the special has its obvious.... uh. issues. product of its time and all that. iykyk. anyway LADIES. They're competent. They take No Shit from Zenigata. The random little crush that comes out of nowhere between Chinjao and Goemon is cute as hell. Plus, I've seen some pretty rockin' fandom redesigns floating around.... wouldn't mind in the slightest if they made a comeback.

I'm gonna lump all of the Betrayers into one category: Emily O'Brien from Angel Tactics, Kazami from Fuma Conspiracy, and Terry Crown from Alcatraz Connection. Never expected the "Zenigata's partner is the bad guy!!1" trope would be so prevalent, but it tracks in retrospect. It's a neat enough idea-- bummer they never seemed to nail it down, though.

The only reason O'Brien is so predictable is because she's so goddamn unlikable. There's hardly any screentime of them working together and in every single scene, the incompetency just feels so blatantly intentional its almost offensive lmao. Zero surprise in the slightest when she showed her true colors-- just mild annoyance, which tracks for the whole special tbh. Only worthwhile parts are the beginning and the end, and absolutely none of that has anything to to with O'Brien.

Kazami just has that chump secondary villain face y'know. Again, a bit on the nose how obnoxiously dorkish he is-- but them playing up him putting on his glasses so Fujiko can recognize him got a little laugh outta me, ngl. He served his purpose, plain and simple.

I'll never know whether Crown was predictable or not because I stumbled across ""Evil Columbo"" before I watched Alcatraz, but despite the spoiler I can at least say he isn't lame as shit. Pre-reveal, he's probably the closest we'll get to a taste of what Melon might be like in modern Lupin media. He's your run-of-the-mill corrupt sleazebag detective-- steals evidence, generally doesn't give a fuck, takes cheap jabs at Zenigata-- but their final standoff is what puts him above Kazami for me. Just a real melodramatic overdramatic moment of Zenigata Zenigata-ing his heart out.

Welcome to the ELDERLY MEN CATEGORY, OORAH. The old guy from Twilight Gemini, Kogoro Akechi from the pilot, and George McFly from First Contact. I could track down Gemini old guy's name, but I hand-to-god couldn't care less. The only worth a damn thing Gemini's given me is that one jigzeni screenshot, so we're just gonna move on to the next two.

Not much of Akechi, huh. He only shows up in the pilot and doesn't do anything of note besides be someone for Lupin to disguise himself as. Dare i say Goemon was a more effective ally to Zenigata than Akechi...? yeah sure, why not. Goemon's a zeni sidekick. i'll die on that hill. anyway I believe he's also a reference to a pre-existing character...? like Lupin, Goemon, and Zenigata are. All in all its probably for the best that he didn't make it to part 1.

Finally, the only old guy that actually has aspects to talk about. I actually really like McFly and the role he plays in First Contact; it isn't Zenigata learning from whoever his partner may be, but McFly learning from Zenigata. He's a jaded, on-the-verge-of-retirement type that thinks he's seen all the force has to offer, but here comes this young (is he considered "young" in this?? early, maybe) freak-ass foreigner cop with a vendetta he's practically frothing at the mouth to rectify. Neither of them are exactly enthused to be working together, but McFly sticks around anyway and learns to see past a lot of Zenigata's first impression baggage; the tenacity, the passion, the genuineness of it all. Not only does he want to make real change, but the crazy bastard can actually friggin' do it. ...Or at the very least make a sizable dent.

Zenigata sincerely adheres to the idea of what a cop's supposed to be, fundamentally, and not what a "cop" actually is, as a vague collective occupational concept. Zenigata has a genuine effect on McFly-- enough to make him just the slightest bit less soured by the end of it all. It's a nice sentiment; that no matter where you are in life, ideas can still change. It's a small arc that flies beneath the radar of everything else, but i noticed it. I FRIGGIN' NOTICED IT, MAN

tl;dr Zenigata's a lonely guy, sure, but he doesn't have to be.

That should cover all of the significant parts/specials/movies, but if i missed anyone (any notable episodes? manga?) lemme know. Either way, it's nice finally having 'em all in one place.

[lytkit]

deleting all my posts means new intro… INSANITY!!

i go byy mathew or calvin.. insane another 14 year old trans tccer going by cal ugh pack of fags. sorry anyway.

i’m 14, as mentioned already LOL, i’mm transgender ftm nd homoromantic :p i have a pretty swag boyfriend… hi reffie!! he makes some cool art i’ll tag him at the bottom :T

i’m autistic nd i have adhd + anxiety and depression and stuff… so there’s that. i lack a proper personality huzzah! i will just mirror yours or i will mirror a character or person i like at the time so there’s that.

i strugglee with talking to people a lot but i would quite like some more tcc friends :) i’ll try my hardest myself to engage with people but feel free to dm me or just stuff like that, i like talking with people but i struggle mostly with starting conversations myself!!

i’m not much of a proper poster i mostly reblog stuff but i’m gonna try and at least make myself useful and post stuff even if it’s just input on certain things or stupid concepts and ya!!

i do not condone personally and i don’t really have a dni?? if i don’t like you i’ll probably just block you! but if you don’t do any research on perpetrators and just find them attractive then i’ll probably stray away from you… soz

ummm outside of tcc and the basic movies (zero day nd elephant, i love john mcfarland and elias mcconnell.) i likeee one wheat mark and stranger things, cry of fear, skins uk, conan gray, the aquabats, tokio hotel, yaelokre, ken ashcorp umm the walking dead!! idk what else.

i am cringe i fear. i have less of a personality offline then i do online so i’m active a lot of the time 😭 i have notifications on for dms and replies too so even if i’m not on i’ll probably still reply a lot of the time. feel free to ask for like discord or tt if you’d prefer to talk on there.. i’ll probably just have to warm up to you first!!

i’m trying to be more organised after clearing ALL of my posts and reblogs so some tags and stuff, helps me stay organised even tho i’ll forget abt them half the time hehe

#calvin posting — me stuff! just talking mostly, about my day or just stupid little things

#andre posting — stuff about or mentioning my boyfriend, reblogs or his posts and stuff (hi @armedyom)

#reblogs — straight forward!! basic reblogs! trying to stay organised with those cause i reblog more than i actually post hehe

#rambles — absolute yammering. nonsense that doesn’t even make sense half the time

#whining — me being mopey or venting.. i am a very miserable fella so there may or may not be a fair amount of this. I DO NOT KNOW!!

i think this is all that really matters, sorry for adding so much :)

hope to make some friends nd stuff!! need more of those… i talk to like 3 people so chat to me!! i’ll be happy to listen

[gh0stsp1d3r]

Tangerines and deers part 10

Tag list: @slut-f0r-u

Series masterlist

The white death stepped onto the train, to see his daughter.

“Daughter.” He said in Russian.

“Father.” She said back.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

Ladybug stepped out with the briefcase. It beeped.

“Hey, uh, fellas, I’m looking for a Mr. Death. Got his case here.” He said to a few assassins. They snapped their heads to the strange man, carrying the case, and wearing a little bracelet with a deer and a ladybug charm. he got one for himself as well, to match with you.

“Hey, easy.” He said, as they roughly took the case. They hit him in the stomach, he groaned and fell to his knees.

They drew sharp blades and he sighed.

“Hurt people hurt people.”

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

You watched the scene go down, while moving from car to car, as he slowly got farther and farther.

“He’ll be fine, love.” Tangerine grabbed your hand, and started to run.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“I came to see you.” The prince said.

“Hm.”

“And to make you finally see me. The real me.”

“Hm.”

“I built myself up from the nothing you gave me. All do I could be the one in front of you today…” she looked down at her gun, and brought it to his face.

“My finger on the trigger. I was the one… who deserved your attention. Your love. I’m more like you than that little fuckup ever was.”

He took her gun, she breathed heavily. He laughed and pointed it at her as she cried.

“Do it. I came here to kill you. So kill me. Kill me like you did all the others who tried the same. Do it. Fucking do it!”

He moved the gun up, and imitated a gun shot to tease her. “Pow.” He laughed and went closer to her.

“I see you, dochka. I always have.” He grabbed her jaw. “But you have never been part of my plan.” He pushed her aside, his men following after him.

“We found the American!” One said, and the white death looked at him on his knees.

“What about the others?”

“They’re all dead. Uh, good news is I have your case.”

“Ay, good news, good news.”

“Clear the train.”

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“All right, Thomas. Time for you to start up-“ Lemon said, and paused.

“Oh shit, everything’s in Japanese. There is no episode in Japanese. What the f-“

You and Tangerine went against the man’s orders, and went to help Kimura anyways.

“Thought you could use the help.” You shrugged when he asked what you were doing there. You grabbed the katana out of your back holster.

“Hell yeah.” You muttered, waiting around the corner with it as tangerine stood far away from you.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“Get on the ground!” One of his men told the man, he kneeled onto the floor.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“Man, I got a bad feeling about this. We have no idea what’s in this case.”

“What are you talkin’ about?” The other assassin said.

“Why is it always gotta be us that opens this shit?”

“Just open the case. I’d like to keep my fuckin’ arms.”

“Uhh, Mr. Death, if I may? The shadow buyer, who bought all our contracts, got us all on this train, Me, the hornet, Tangerine, Lemon.. Deer. That was you, right?” Ladybug asked.

“Yes, very astute. I brought you on this train hoping you’d kill each other.”

“Okay. Well, um… if I could… why?”

“Why you do what you do?”

“You know I’ve been asking that very question. I kept going because of deer, but… now I have no reason too, honestly.” He said, trying to sell it that she was dead. If he found out , and he killed her himself, he would’ve never forgave himself

“If it’s so safe, why didn’t he just open it? What if it’s a bomb and it blows up in our faces? You think these stupid masks are gonna protect us?”The assassin said.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“All these years later… the burden of your betrayal still heavy upon your heads. Let me relieve you of both.” The elder said, the assassins looked confused.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“My wife… was taken from me.”

“I heard. I’m so sorry for your loss. It was a horrible accident.”

The white death laughed “Horrible.”

“Oh, no, no. No. Nothing in life is an accident. It was an assassination attempt on me. Fate put two wet work operatives, twins, on a job in Bolivia, butchering my entire crew. And I had to go deal with it.”

Ladybug snapped his head to him, and looked as he put the puzzles together.

“Oh shit. Deers boyfriend and his brother killed his crew! This makes everything worse.” He thought.

“Fate put a girl, only 16 years old, and had her eliminate 2 of my entire buildings with only her hands and a sword.”

“Deer?” He asked him, a little shocked. He didn’t even know you did other jobs before you worked with him, Maria had said she was new.

“Yes, fate was when I left the hospital as soon as I heard, and left her alone. And then I got a call, saying she had died.”

“Oh. That- that sucks, honestly.”

“That is why it was my wife in the car that night, not me. Fate put my wife in the hospital. A piece of her rib, piercing her heart. Only the most skilled cardiovascular surgeon could save her life. But two nights earlier, this surgeon was poisoned. Fate. Fate again.”

“And then the hornet killed the surgeon! Holy shit.” He thought.

“Don’t wanna sound judgmental, but if you hired the hornet, you had your own kid killed?”

“Oh, yes.”

“Okay.”

“Oh, yes I did. The piece of shit. That night… I told her not to leave. To wait for me. But she promised it was the last time we would ever bail him out of trouble. Well, I suppose she was right. If I had amputated that weakness out of my life years ago, she would still be by my side!”

“Yeah, it helps to process this. I have- I have a good therapist.”

“I loved my wife very much. She taught me a valuable lesson. If you do not control your fate… it will control you.”

“Hm. Hm?” He was a little confused at the saying.

“So I took control. I brought them all here to die. But now there is only one left. Mr. Carver.”

“Whoa. Uh… excuse me?” He said, fucking carver. He thought.

“The man who murdered my wife.”

“Bro-“

“Just open it.” The assassin said.

“Fine!” The other assassins opened the case, and it exploded as Ladybug yelled “Im not carver!”

The assaisains flew back, and they were now on the train.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

The older man threw his hat, and he grabbed the assassins weapon, and sliced his neck with it.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

You held your stance, and held the katana tight, but not too tight. You held it only slightly above your head, and waited for the assassin to come there.

You sliced his neck, he immediately went into the floor and you laughed.

“Can’t believe I remembered that.” You smirked, and Tangerine just looked at you in admiration.

And then Kimura hit the other ones with a heavy bottle, which also worked. Then he grabbed another katana from the other assassin. You let him do the work, putting yours away and looked back to tangerine.

(Bitch we twinninnn 🤭😜)

“I think he’s got it. We should probably go help Lemon now.” You said.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

Ladybug was upside down, he groaned. At least the plan worked. He thought.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

You both ran over to Lemon.

“Oh shit, something’s happening.” He said and the train started to move. He ran through some signs, and the remaining assassins ran onto the train quickly.

Tangerine grabbed his shoulder and looked over it.

“How the hell do you know how to drive a train?” You asked him.

“I don’t!”

“Wha- never mind. You don’t know how to slow this damn thing down?!” You said, and was going to help him when you noticed something.

Ladybug opened the door, and you turned your head to him.

“You’re safe.” You said, relieved.

“I promised, right? And when have I ever broken a promise?”

“A lot of times.” You laughed, and hugged him. He laughed too.

You guys stopped and turned back to Lemon.

“Hey, so far so good. You can stop the train.”

“About that, I took the velocity of the train and divided it by the mass, and I realize that I don’t know how to fuckin’ drive a bullet train!”

“All you talk about is trains! How the hell do you not know?” Tangerine groaned in annoyance.

“Man, Thomas is a metaphor for lie, not how to actually drive- Get down!” He said, as some assassins started to shoot.

Tangerine grabbed you by your waist and you both ducked on the floor, right in front of a seat and in front of ladybug.

The assassin had to reload, and you, Ladybug, and Tangerine were going to get up, before Lemon yelled “I got this! Stop the train!”

“What?!”

Lemon kicked one, and they all fell down like bowling pins.

“Uh- Deer, you know how to read Japanese, right?!” Ladybug looked at you.

“Yeah! But I don’t understand what any of this fucking means! I don’t know shit about trains-“

“I got them, take care of this.” Tangerine said, as another assassin came up behind you guys.

“English, English, English, English, Brakes!” Ladybug scanned through the book. “We’re good! I got it!”

Then, the manual dropped and all the pages went flying. While he was distracted, he noticed another train. They were on the wrong track.

“Hang on!”

“We’re on the wrong track!” You grabbed onto the seat next to you, and you were next to ladybug.

Once that was over, there was fire next to you.

“I’m sorry I shot you!” Lemon apologized to Ladybug.

“Actually, it was like, twice!”

“Apologize later, fucking Do something!” Tangerine said, and knocked out the last assassin.

“Sorry?”

“You show me twice!” But one of the assassins on top of the train made his way down, landing directly on top of you. You groaned as he sat on top of you.

Tangerine kicked him off, and hit him with the fire extinguisher repeatedly.

“I’m sorry for shooting you twice!”

“Thanks man! That shows real growth!” You groaned and held your head, and just laid there in the chaos.

The fire extinguisher was out, and tangerine grabbed your hand and helped you up.

“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck.” Ladybug smashed the buttons with it, and then threw it back, which hit another assassin. He pushed the red button and the door opened, he flew out.

“My head hurts.” You muttered, sitting down.

There was only one assassin left, behind Lemon. Ladybug threw the knife at him.

“Hey, and I’m sorry for almost killing you.” He looked at tangerine, as he sat next to you and held your hand.

Tangerine just gave him a scowl.

Another assassin got up, and lemon dove out of the train.

Tangerine got up, and yelled for him.

“What the fuck!” You said.

You got up, and stood next to Ladybug now.

You saw the emergency brakes, and quickly got down. You worked with the wires, while ladybug watched.

Tangerine watched as well, And it was annoying. You groaned in frustration. “Fuck it.” You muttered, and ripped all the wires out.

The train started to slow down, and ladybug gave you a high five.

But then, tangerine grabbed you as soon as he saw the wall. You guys ran through the wall, and ladybug fell onto you both, all three of you went through the whole train.

Then, it stopped completely in a village. Ladybug and tangerine groaned, and got up.

Tangerine looked around, panicked.

He saw you, eyes closed and on the ground.

“Oh fuck. Fuck, fuck.” He said, and ladybug went next to him.

“She’s breathing. She’s fine, She probably just passed out. Her heads fragile.” He said, with a quiet laugh as he remembered the multiple times you’ve passed out.

Then, he looked back to see the white death.

“Oh, fuck.” He said as he pointed the gun at ladybug.

“About your wife, I had nothing to do with that. It’s a mistake. I’m not carver. I- We only do snatch and grab jobs.” He gestured to himself and you, who laid on the ground.

“The carver! I want the carver! I hired the carver!”

“No, he had a stomach thing, man. We’re just filling in.”

Then, you got up, breathing heavily.

“How’d I survive that?” You muttered and looked down at your broken hand.

Tangerine sighed in relief, kissing your forehead.

“For what it’s worth, carver is a dick.”

“Biggest dick I’ve seen in my life.” You said, and groaned again, hitting your head against the remains of the train.

“The most cunning assassin.. Maybe the laziest.”

The white death pointed the gun to you. It clicked. Tangerine immediately stood in front of you.

“Don’t think your gun works, man.” You laughed as the gun only clicked. Ladybug snickered.

He pulled out another. “Oh come on! Just let it go, I was 16.” You giggled and stared at him.

That gun didn’t work either. Because once he shot it again, it shot him in the face instead.

“Oh.”

You laughed hysterically, tangerine looked back at you, confused.

“Oh…”

“That’s so gross, it’s funny.” You laughed again.

“Man, did you really fall that hard?” Ladybug muttered and got up.

“Tan, you look funny.” You muttered and put your finger on his nose. He scrunched his nose again.

“Tan?” He asked, eyebrows scrunched.

“It’s a nickname, duhhh.”

“Why do I need a nickname for a nickname?”

“You don’t. It’s just cute.” You shrugged your shoulder, he sighed as you stood up next to him.

“Just like you.”

“I’m not cute. Never call me that again.” He said.

“Yes you are.” You said in a baby voice.

“Hey, about this plum, shouldn’t the plum give up all resentment? Like-“ Ladybug asked as they all walked. A machine gun fired, and you all looked over to where it came from.

All five of you stopped.

“Oh my god.”

“This bitch again?” You sighed.

“It’s my luck that delivered my fathers corpse at my feet.”

“The narcissism on this chick. Untreatable.”

“She doesn’t look too good.” You said, staring at her bloodied clothes and face.

“Now I am-“ she held the gun up.

“Okay, wait, wait, wait. What is with this fucked up family? You need some suggested reading, if I may. Surviving borderline personality disorder.”

“What?” She asked.

“It’s true.” You shrugged.

“I highly recommend it.”

“Now I am the white d-“ A truck ran her over. A truck full of tangerines, to be exact.

“What was that? Was that karma?”

“It was Lemon.” Tangerine said, and walked over to the driver.

“Farewell, tentomushi.” The older man said.

You looked back to Ladybug, who looked confused.

You just shrugged.

A car pulled up, and you looked over.

“Heyyy!” You said, waving to Maria.

“Maria?”

“Did you come to rescue us?”

“Did you need rescuing?”

“You came to rescue us.”

“Please don’t make me regret it.”

Lemon and tangerine came over to you guys.

“Who’s this?” Tangerine asked.

“Our handler.” You shrugged.

“Oh.” He muttered.

“The.. twins I’m guessing?” She looked to them.

“Yup. Did you know we made out?” You pointed to you and tangerine.

“I can tell..” she muttered, looking at the hickeys on both your necks. You giggled and tangerines face heated up.

“Tangerine, I forgot to ask… where do you live? Like… just-“ you turned to him.

“London.”

“Oh.” You said. A long distance relationship might be hard.

“But… me and Lemon were planning on moving soon anyways.”