#<- LITERALLY TOO CUZ I PLAY BASS

[septic-9mil]

DUUUDE I JUST GOTTA FIX THE ARMPIT AREA cuz you can see my bra 💀 AND THEN ITLL LOOK SO FUCKING COOL

I cant ever wear it 1. Around my parents or 2. To school . So like i have no where i csn wear it but this is the best thing ive ever seen myself wear i feel so cool wearing it ack im gonna be thinking about this forever and ever i csnt wait until i can move out then i csn wesr whatever i want

[spikrock]

do you guys ever get like. genuinely emotional when you think about alternate realities where you dont like your favorite things

[heartkaji]

　 ★…𝐀𝐓𝐋4𝐍𝐓𝐀 𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐊 ?! ❞

୨ৎ synopsis. blue lock characters but they’re hood. based on the atlanta lock ! tiktok trend.

୨ৎ includes. bachira meguru, isagi yoichi, nagi seishiro, shidou ryusei, otoya eita

୨ৎ notes. this has been in my drafts since july cuz ive been procrastinating, hope it’s not too late to post this 🙏

★ BACHIRA MEGURU— LIL SMOKEY

“shit, we making it out the hood with this one y’all ! run the track again—fire flame flow productions ain’t neva miss.”

you roll your eyes as bachira daps up isagi.

you’ve been here for an hour & you can feel your eardrums beginning to rot like dead peaches. bachira raps over a beat you swear you’ve heard from lucki, but he’s quick to shush you when you bring it up. you cross tired arms over your chest as the music winds up and bachira starts his verse again.

“pretty bitch, yeah she got me seein’ stars, like it when i thrust, fuck her all the way to mars,”

isagi whistles. you contemplate suicide.

“she think that i’m loyal but i switch my bitch like cars, new whip every day and no i’m not just penning bars !”

“type shit !” isagi calls. you still in your seat. what ?

your chest swells with something akin to rage. you were already exhausted, ears wilting at the boom of the bass. bachira’s been redoing the same verse for hours, but you’d never paid attention to your boyfriend’s lyrics till now. you march over to the sound panel and shut it down with closed fist.

“bachira meguru—!”

“fucking hell, woman ! the fuck did you do that for—?“

you march into the booth and slap him silly.

bachira looks back at you with mouth agape and red tinged cheeks. his face is blood drenched and you almost feel guilty but you tighten your chest & straighten your back.

“what the hell did you just say, meg ?”

“what are you on about—“

“don’t play with me right now, meg. word to my mother i’ll slap y’ left cheek too. fuck you mean you riding a new bitch every day, huh ?”

bachira groans, rubbing at his cheek. “god, those are just lyrics ! you tripping for real—“

you slap his left cheek.

“you think you’re future or something ? fucking try me meg. you’re lucky i know you don’t actually have the balls to cheat. change those lyrics. now.”

bachira mumbles something under his breath before marching to the sound station. a boyish giggle breaks the quiet, and you shoot a glare at yoichi, causing silence to envelope the room once again before bachira revs up the track.

“she know that i’m loyal cuz i treat her like a star, call me yuki chiba man, ‘watashi wa star !’ ”

★ ISAGI YOICHI — YXNG EGOIST

“yoichi, you were raised in a gated community. you do not have opps.”

isagi clicks his tongue. the sound is muffled under the wool of his thick balaclava, but you manage to make it out regardless. “you don’t understand, princess. just keep watch for me, alright ?”

“yoichi.”

you heave your third sigh of the evening. you and isagi were at a high end restaurant for a date, but suddenly you wished you were home. you’d been looking forward to having dinner with the busy striker all week, but now that you’re here together with you in a fancy dress while he sports a thick balaclava, you can’t help but feel embarassed.

“yoichi i’m literally begging you to take that off.”

isagi lifts the chin of his mask to sneak a bite of chicken with his fork. he quickly takes a sip of water before dragging the mask back over his lips, eyes darting from side to side to scope his surroundings. he breathes a relieved sigh. “i think i’m safe for now..”

“alright, i’m going home.”

“huh ? what — no, babe, i’ll take it off, come back !”

★ NAGI SEISHIRO — SUGARHILL SEI

“riddle me this, sei. how the fuck your bank account low but your ass getting high ?”

you and reo stand arms crossed over a faded nagi, his eyes blood tinged & cheeks hot & swollen. his breathing is labored as he fits the blunt to his lips to take yet another drag.

“cuh i ain’ even got time fuh dis forreal. y’all mothafuckas just be bouncin’ on my dick fo’ no reason man.”

“what the hell is he saying ?”

“i think he’s speaking ganglish ?”

“oh hell no.” reo snaps his fingers over his head, “i rebuke every spirit of hoodlum in you, bro. what the fuck nagi, is this what you’ve come to ?”

nagi rubs his forehead & for a second he bears an uncanny resemblance to travis scott. “cuh i ain’ even—“ FWAM !

reo dashes a hot slap to nagi’s cheek. the red handprint glistens against his pale skin & your palms fly to cover your gaping mouth. “reo ! that’s—that’s too far !”

“stay out of this y/n,” nagi lays limp on the room floor, his eyes rapidly blinking with his mouth agape. “this is just the beginning. if we don’t correct him now, he’ll start dressing like a carti fan before you know it !”

reo hops unto one foot, aggressively tugging a chancla off the other. he turns to nagi.

“sorry bro, i don’t wanna do this,”

“cuh—“

FWAM !

★ SHIDOU RYUSEI — MR. FREAK

“gyattttt”

“i’m breaking up with you.”

“no mami i’m sorryyy,” shidou drawls playfully, arms circling your hips. he tugs you closer to him so you’re pressed flush against his skin.

“respectfully asking you to wear these ‘forbidden tights’ more often, ma. this recoil is insane.” he makes a slurping noise and you question your existence.

“ryusei—“

“boing !” shidou chuckles to himself as he slaps your ass. the flesh is soft in his palms and he’s about to indulge his intrusive thoughts once again before you slap him with your purse.

“shidou ryusei ! in the public eye ?!”

“government name is crazyyy.”

“i’m going home.” you begin heading towards the exit with a noisy shidou calling after you, “bae come back ! it was just jokes !”

★ OTOYA EITA — LIL’ FLOCKA

“nah cuz what you know about ken carson for real though.”

you groan for the third time today. “eita it’s enough.”

“no babe i’m just sayin,” he rubs lazy circles along your hip bone, lips pressed lazily against the back of your shoulder, “since you wanna be lip syncing to unreleased ken, you must know more about him than i do, right ?”

“oh my fucking god. literally who said that ?”

“no but you implied it. look at you posting yoself singing with your big ole’ tatas.”

“eita i’m literally gonna leave you for karasu right now.”

“nah nah chill it’s just,” he swipes through your story, clicking his tongue when he notices you’ve posted yourself to yet another underground artist, this time thouxanbanfouani. he bites his inner cheek to stop himself from asking you to take your story down.

“you don’t get him like i do, you feel me ?”

“congratulations otoya. the fuck you telling me that for ?”

“take your story down.”

“we’re over.”

© ─ heartkaji ; do not steal, copy, edit, translate or reupload

[inf3ct3dd]

ellie headcanons pt.3,,,!!

warnings: mentions of boobs, ass (lmao) , mild sexual content, use of the d-slur (jokingly)

content: loser!ellie x reader :3 my pookieeee

authors note: these r actually my favorite things to write ever like im so glad yall like them :333

pt. 2. taglist!!! masterlist!!!!

☆ REALLY likes beef jerky. she’ll just sit there and chew…

- her hands r just constantly freezing. like DEAD PERSON COLD ITS SCARYYYY!!! she definitely uses ur boobs as handwarmers and its JARRING because her hands are actually so cold 😞😞!!!

- HER FEET TOO!!! she has some sort of circulation issues bc you’ll be in bed together and she’ll put her feet on you and you’ll just turn into a cartoon ice cube 😕😕

- the SECOND u have some sort of drama she is seated. like she is so MESSY she will talk shit abt someone she knows absolutely nothing abt just bc u don’t like them. anyone you hate she hates 💪🏽💪🏽

- speaking of she is literally so sassy 😞😞 like she will literally full body turn away from you and look at the window while you drive if she’s mad at you.

- every time you say something even remotely sexual she’s looking at you like 🤨 and trying not to laugh. if you texted her “im coming” she’d burst out laughing and write back like “geez we’re just going to the zoo…didn’t know u were THAT excited”

- has the humor of a middle school boy. she has an actual problem w deez nuts jokes 😞😞 she thinks its SOOOO FUNNY to give u fake backshots whenever you bend over around her. fake moans and everything 💔💔

- a pharb AND a barb. she definitely knows all of super bass by heart, and she knows how to play savior complex on the guitar. duality of women!!!

- every time you say something nice to her she’s like “ew thats gay” and then she gets upset when u get upset for it 😞 so RUDE actually!!!

- really likes doing facemasks with you because you always put them on for her, and because you look really stupid with them on.

- this video. js this whole video like!!! she definitely has that dinosaur hand sanitizer AND that backpack!!

- likes rings cuz she thinks they make her look cool, but she literally cannot keep them for more than a month. they get lost SO EASILY!!!

- knows a concerning amount of things about the roman empire.

- definitely saw the barbie movie with you, and got so embarrassed at the ken guitar scene ☹️ “do i do that??” and you had to hold back laughter and tell her no

- if you have little siblings, they LOVE HER. she is so good with kids its insane. she would definitely do the griddy w ur little brother and you would NEVER let her live it down

- if you take her to a family gathering, she’s either talking with your uncles or hanging out with your younger cousins. she’s scared of your cousins your age bc they’re “cool like you”

- definitely bought you lego flowers at one point and sat on the floor and built them with you

- has those glow-in-the-dark stars on her bedroom ceiling

- would absolutely lick your salt lamp “for science”

- one time you put her hair in pigtails and she wore it the whole day, and refused to let her friends make fun of it cuz her “wife” did them

- talks about you like a 40 year old man talks about his wife. “gotta get home to the wife” definitely has “happy wife happy life!” on a tshirt

- built the two of you a house on minecraft and put your beds next to each otherrrr :((

- carved your name on her skateboard and guitar

- had an AWFUL emo phase in middle school. terrible. was absolutely an avid tumblr user

- such a nerd about vinyls. would take u on dates to her favorite vinyl store, and buy you a new vinyl player because “yours damages your vinyls, and the audio quality is shit” (you randomly bought it on amazon)

- just knows so many facts…about things…. like she’s always talking to you like “oh my god babe did you know that-“

- would get “jealous” of your pets whenever you’d pet them or hold them in front of her. just going up to your cat like “she likes me more than you”

- made herself one of those “i love my girlfriend” tshirts with your face on it

- your dad definitely loves her because they have so much in common. grilling, fishing,camping, she’s like the ultimate dad-dyke

- can fall asleep ANYWHERE. like the second she’s tired she’s just 😴😴 and she’s definitely using you as a pillow

- one time the two of you went to a family party and you found her asleep on two folded chairs

- you’re her wallpaper on all her devices.

- every time you ask her what she’s doing and she’s playing guitar shes like “just fingering my guitar”. she thinks its SOOOO HILARIOUS

- definitely says white ppl shit all the time on accident . one time she said “lets rock and roll” when you two were going somewhere and she literally didn’t talk for 5 minutes cuz you could not stop laughing

- LOVES burts bees !!! her lips always taste like their strawberry chapstick and its wonderful

- has a pair of lightning mcqueen crocs

- LOVESSSS when you paint her nails and do her makeup (she just likes you sitting on her lap)

- definitely one of those girls thats like. obsessed w doctor pepper. its a serious problem 😞😞!!!

- has a little shoe box full of receipts, polaroids of you, and little souvenirs from your dates. :((

- literally melts when you scratch her back

- very into horror games/analog horror. definitely binge watched markipliers “faith” gameplay and talked about it nonstop

- miles morales is def her fave superhero. has so many of his comics and LOVES the spiderverse movies. calls you her gwen 😞😞

taglist!!! if ur name is crossed i cant tag u :((

@syrenada @dinaissoprettyoml @kingofmylastkiss @as2rid @greencacty @melissabarrerass @bratydoll @lov3lylotus @forelliesposts @echostinn @f3r4lfr0gg3r @r3wbeef @leatheredhearts @mousymaven @mina-281 @princessguardian444 @calystas-morning-tea @horror-whoree @slutshies @bearieio @mag-mfm @bubs-world @paran0id0blivi0n @sawaagyapong @bbygrlshelbs @gayh0rr0r @pl9ys @ellieslilslvvt @dollietes @elliesmellsbadd @ibloom4u @ddreabea @beestar120 @brunettedolls-blog @girlwonderchloe @elliesgflol @maris-koffin @emonopolyman @iloveeyousblog @fr3sh-tragedies @ilovaffles @certifedcrybunny @elleatethat @baldph0bic @clouded-whispers @4rt3m1ss @saggykneecaps @swtsuna @ell1esslutt @minixmel @yuyans-stuff @owmoiralover @thecowardwrites @lunascerebro @elliestrwbrry @iwantsoda @teeveegirl @dinasmoon @urnewghostfriend

[yyokkki]

Warning: Chapter 7 Spoilers!!

Malleus Draconia

The local wizard! He’s a big enigma to the townspeople and people either hate him or love him! (Not true, literally only Leona and Diasomnia feel that strongly for him)

Not much is known about magic in this world and it’s said only fae and their descendants are capable of wielding it.

Lives in the forest in a tower that houses two very well maintained gargoyles. 

When you receive a letter from him about the junimos he adds that you should get gargoyles too for a better drainage system…

In this universe I think you would already know who he is from the get go but he won’t tell you his name so you nickname him Tsunotaro/Hornton anyways.

Is very close to Lilia, Sebek and Silver! Lilia raised him, he half raised Silver and Sebek is his apprentice! (He took him in out of fondness)

He’s actually a descendant of fae royalty from a fallen kingdom ages old but now he’s living at NRV.

He’s very lonely and was very glad to hear a little farmer with no knowledge of his reputation had moved in.

And yes, stone is a liked gift for him-

Loved Gifts: Ice Cream, Any Gem, Rose, Dinosaur Egg, Universal Loves

“Heh. It takes quite the feat to impress someone of my calibre, child of man. You’ve done well.”

Hated Gifts: Pink Cake, Chocolate Cake, Strange Bun (Specifically the Lilia branded ones…), Iron Bar, Universal Hates

“...” Lighting turns it into ashes.

Lilia Vanrouge

The owner and leader of the adventurer’s guild! Started it with Baul who is currently in the Skull Caverns.

Is actually fae and a powerful wizard but nobody in town knows, they just think he’s this weird kid who’s really good with the sword.

Lives in a little cottage in the woods with his son Silver who he took in when he was but a babe.

Malleus was living with them before but had to move out cuz his cauldrons and bookshelves were taking up too much space. They still live very close by though so he brings food over whenever he cooks! (Malleus teleports to ten different locations and Lilia follows)

.He’s considering retiring from his position at the adventurers guild and passing it onto Silver.

He has been training Silver and Sebek in the art of swordsmanship since they were young.

He’s in a band with Cater and Kalim, he plays the bass! Occasionally travels to the city for concerts!

Is often found at his cottage or at the adventurers guild!

Loved Gifts: Tomatoes, Black Licorice, Tomato Juice, Pizza, Strange Bun, Universal Loves

“How precious! I’m guessing my cuteness has charmed you? Fufu~”

Hated Gifts: Marshmallows, Solar Essence, Bat Wing, Universal Hates

“Hm. I'm rather disappointed in you, farmer..."

Silver Vanrouge

A knight in training, learning swordsmanship from Lilia! 

A lot of Lilia’s training consists of going down into the mines and freestyling so he picks up requests from the bulletin board often to hit two birds with one stone. Lilia banned him from going down alone after his first time passing out though…

Often passes out in the middle of the day and sometimes wakes up to see Ortho charging him 50 gold…

He’s a good friend of the animals in NRV and sometimes visits Kalim’s ranch to see them! He’s also the one who found the cat/dog that becomes your companion!

I feel like he has a mini garden near his cottage too! He bans Lilia from entering.

Goes horse racing with Sebek and Riddle every sunny Monday!

Is often found at his cottage, in the mines or taking a nap on a tree near town square.

Loved Gifts: Acorns, Mushroom Risotto, Coffee, Espresso, Universal Loves

“This is a great gift. How can I convey my gratitude?”

For Coffee and Espresso: “Thank you, farmer. This will keep me awake for training… Probably.”

Hated Gifts: Strange Bun (Also the Lilia branded ones…), Universal Hates

“Uhm, this is a rather… Unconventional gift."

For Strange Bun: “!! Has father been in the kitchen recently?!”

Sebek Zigvolt

A half-fae who’s the proud apprentice of the great wizard! 

Lives with his parents, older brother and older sister and is childhood friends with Silver! Lilia basically sees him as another son with how often he’s around.

His father works as a dentist in town and his mother is an adventurer!

His family goes on fishing trips often.

Is able to use magic due to being half fae but the village doesn’t wanna give him the respect that deserves cuz he’s such a loudmouth…

He also still trains with Silver and Lilia regularly!

Goes horseback riding with Riddle and Silver every sunny Monday but is actually deathly afraid of horses…

Loved Gifts: Salmon Carpaccio, Books, Universal Loves

“Hmph, not bad for a human!"

Hated Gifts: Coffee, Espresso, Iron Bar, Strange Bun (Once again…)

“A slight to me is a slight to Master Malleus! Be prepared, human!”

For Strange Bun: “T-This is!! I will accept this… For Master Lilia…”

---

TWST x SDV Masterlist

Tag List (Interact with the linked post to be tagged in future updates mwah)

Tag List Below Dropdown

@coffee-or-hot-cocoa @neuvilletteshusbandd @multifandomlazywriter @whimsybloom

@petaled-pages @blerp-22 @lazy-raven @the-ghost-0f-t0m0

@iamlowkeycrying @sleep-ydragon @loopdydee @hrhqueenfox

@mielle-estelar @cerisescherries @asillysleepy @sarah22447

@iamstillalive158 @fatally-incorrect @kumikokane @lettuceyarn

@awkwardlyso @banshee-y-etc @wolfdragongodex @honehbee42

@yvonneyudith @gyarukitti @animatesiti @paprikalol

@agaygothicmushroom

[corndog-patrol]

ranking hobbit media by how sexy thranduil is okay go

first up we have 1977 rankin bass thran. and what a fucking mess he is.

they made him bald??? why?? he’s an elf where are the beautiful locks?? you can’t tell me that smidgen of hair on the side is beautiful elf locks. also that hunched posture is terrible for his back. 0/10

2003 Hobbit Game

okay this one earns some points for nostalgia but he is so fucking polygonal. that gamecube crust just DESTROYS the quality of his... everything. he does look a bit better in the cutscenes tho

kind of a serve. 5/10

The Lord of the Rings: The Battle for Middle-earth II (2006)

cant even find any good images of him from this game. he looks okay? ive never played it. 3/10

2012-2014 Peter Jackson Hobbit movies

okay this is where we peaked as a sexy thranduil society. lee pace thranduil is amazing and his absolutely fucked characterization can be overlooked cuz the aesthetics are literally peak ✨✨✨✨✨ Perfect In Every Way 10/10 ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

The Hobbit LEGO game (2014)

not really sure how to rank this on the sexy scale considering he’s a LEGO but he’s still based on the lee pace thran so that gives him some points. the  best part of this game was smashing shit as sauron after beating it. 7/10

lord of the rings online (LOTRO) (idk when they added him, it looks like 2018 but i have no clue if that’s really true)

The combat in this game is fun but why are half of the quests to fetch animal hides? anyway this thran looks weird, like an older white guy who doesn’t believe in tipping servers. 3/10

finally the new gollum game (2023)

he just looks off? the crown is cool but there’s just TOO much happening with this design. also the game sucks shit. 4/10

and that’s it. they should put more thranduils in media so i can rate them.

[deafeninggalaxycandy]

✨️STAN MARSH HEADCANONS ✨️

TW: mentions of self-harm, alcoholism, antidepressants

• Full Name: Stanley Randall Marsh

• He/They (Non-binary)

• Born on October 19th , 2003

• 5'10"

• bisexual (female preference)

• Bipolar depression and bpd. He's split on Wendy hundreds of times

• His anti-depressants made it worse but he's a little bit addicted to them.

• Still an alcoholic. His mom found out when he was 16 and sent him to rehab. He hasn’t stopped but he's cut back a bunch

• Dyes his hair a different color every month or two (or whenever the dyes starts to fade)

• His favorite color is cobalt blue

• He mostly listens to emo bands like, alexisonfire, my chemical romance, pierce the veil, etc.

• He smokes cigarettes and Kyle nags him about it

• He's a quarterback in high school

• Athletic build. he works out and it shows

• He is trying to have a more positive outlook on life so he doesn't end up like his grandpa marvin or randy but his home life and the general terribleness of living in south park makes this difficult.

• Absolutely loves his guitar, it's his most prized possession, he literally doesn’t let anybody touch it

• Most of his time alone is spent playing bass and listening to music (and singing he's a good singer <3)

• He actually hates alcohol but he hates how he feels without it

• He self-harmed for 2 years when he was 14 until he got sent to the hospital after cutting too deep and almost bleeding out. he stopped cutting after that but it led to him pouring all of his leftover pain into alcohol and drinking way more

• His favorite movies are grownups 2 and school of rock. he cries at a dogs purpose and dog movies in general because it reminds him of sparky (he died)

• Wendy does his eyeliner and paints his nails

• He works at a Mcdonalds with Kenny

• He gets his rings and some of his shirts from hot topic

• Sharon eventually had enough of randy and divorced him permanently when stan was 12

• they got split custody of stan and shelly where they stay at Sharon's during the week and tegridy farms during the weekend and vice versa during the summer

• stan hates randy for moving him to tegridy farms and blames him 100% for his parents' divorce

• hangs out with the goth kids sometimes. they still refer to him as raven

• he has a small crush on Kyle (and Kenny)

• He still has his hat even though it's too small. He can't even wear it he just keeps it in his drawer

• His mom makes him blueberry pancakes every Saturday

emo loser stan is so real to me 💀

i only started with 30 headcanons cuz im new to this but I'll probably write more in detail things later on. <3

[multifandombxxch]

PLAY TOO MUCH

requested:

Hey, can you do a plug!Taeyongx x Chubby Reader. Y/n playing too much with Taeyong's feelings cuz y'know he really likes her and whatever but y/n doesn't believe him.

Pairing: Plug! Taeyong x Chubby reader

warnings: age gap, insecurities, fatphobia, raw sex (wrap it before you tap it), S*xual Harassment, mentions of drugs.

"Bout to catch another flight (yeah)

the apple bottom make 'em wanna bite (yeah)

I just wanna have a good night

I just wanna have a good night (hold up)"

The familiar lyrics of Coi Leray's 'Players' were currently blasting through multiple speakers in my dorm parking lot.

What may be the cause of this you ask?

My roommate was having another party.

On a fucking school night.

My bedpost was banging against the wall as the bass of the speakers was quite literally shaking the whole building.

I kissed my teeth in annoyance I was trying to catch up on an episode of 'House of Dragon' for Christ's sake.

"I cannot take this anymore. I'm calling her." I grumbled.

Calling MIRAE<3...

Ring

ring

ri-

"Hey boo, wassup?" she answered

I sighed pinching the bridge of my nose "Rae I literally can't hear myself right now. The music is way too loud and it's getting late. Don't you have an 8am tomorrow? "

she groaned on the other side "Bitch I told you to come downstairs and live a little. You can't spend college cooped up in the dorm."

I rolled my eyes at that. Rae did invite me to the party but I wasn't one for loud music and crowded places plus...I wanted to avoid a specific someone.

"I'm good, thanks and you know I wanna avoid he who shall not be named. " I said.

I didn't have to say his name she knew exactly who I was referring to.

she chuckles nervously on the other side

"what?'" I question a sudden feeling of anxiety filling me.

"Imma just give it to you straight. He's here and I told him you were upstairs so he said he was gonna deal with his clients and then go up to see you."

I took the phone from my ear and stared at it like it was some foreign device.

Then I placed it back on my ear

"Bitch you did what?!"

"Oh calm down. He's literally been obsessed with you since last semester. He's damn dedicated I'll give him that and he's fine as hell." She gushes.

after a couple minutes of silence ( really just me being lost in my own thoughts ) I spoke up

"I'm nervous. I like him but what if he's just fucking around? I'm not exactly his usual type." I admit softly

"Y/n" Mirae's tone is much softer now.

I shut my eyes tightly.

I didn't need pity right now. but I couldn't help but remember the awful things that were said to me

'why do your hips bend in like that...it looks weird'

my hip dips

'you need to start working out I can see the damn rolls on your back

my back rolls

'no one is going to want someone who can't take care of themselves

my body

I didn't think I was attractive or deserving of any attention.

the attention I got from men made me feel dirty instead of wanted.

I mean...being groped by a random man at 15 wasn't something I had on my bucket list.

Now all of a sudden I'm supposed to believe someone wanted me for me.

change the topic from your body Y/n

"It's fine...forget about it." I quickly cover up.

"So how long ago did he say he was coming up" Nice change of topic idiot

she sucks in a breath "He actually went up about 2 minutes ago"

my eyes went wide in panic. Our room was on the third floor I had roughly a couple seconds before he kno-

KNOCK

KNOCK

KNOCK

three rapid knocks came from behind my room door.

"Oh is that him? I'm hanging up then babe." Rae rushed out before hanging up. I put the phone on my nightstand.

Christ, I didn't even have time to fix my hair or something.

I was still seated on my bed when I heard his deep amused voice

"Y/n I gave you enough time to prepare for me so come open the door."

My body jerked at the sudden call out. I hurriedly got off my bed and made my way to the door

I counted to three before opening it and coming face-to-face with he who shall not be named aka Lee Taeyong aka the university's plug.

He grinned as he held up a bag of my favorite snacks "Hey princess...missed me?" Funnily enough, the bag looked out of place in his hand due to his outfit. He was in a black t-shirt and some black ripped jeans. and his signature silver accessories around his neck, wrists, and fingers.

He didn't have his bag with him...weird he usually has it because it contained his "goods"

I must've been staring too long because he suddenly spoke up

"Are you gonna let me in or are you gonna let that mind of yours go places it shouldn't" he smirked

The inside of my mouth became dry and suddenly I couldn't speak. I stepped aside allowing him to walk in and put the bag on my study desk.

I closed the door and turned to him.

No surprise he was already staring at me. he always stares at me.

am I really that ugly?

he was looking me up and down while his bottom lip was caught between his teeth.

"You did all that for me?" he question gesturing to my attire

I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion until I caught myself in the bathroom mirror.

embarrassment

hide...hide right the fuck now.

I completely forgot I was only in an oversized t-shirt that stopped mid-thigh...with no damn bra on.

I gasped and covered my face with both my hands.

he chuckled and I felt him coming closer to me.

suddenly he took my hands from my face.

"Stop being so cute y/n...makes me wanna fuck you more"

my breath caught in my throat.

he only found me attractive because of my body

a familiar feeling of disappointment filled me

he pulled me closer by my hands and moved his hands to grip my waist

"What's wrong cupcake?" he asked concerned.

His black hair fell in front of his face. He was too good to be true.

"Is someone bothering you again?" he grilled me his eyes suddenly turning dark

"No" I answered

"don't lie to me. You know I'd kill for you." he grunted, suddenly gripping my jaw.

he can't be serious right now

he doesn't mean that

"I am serious and I mean every. fucking. word." he said suddenly serious.

did I say that out loud?

Fuck it the worst that could happen is that he destroyed my already low self-confidence so I decided to ask.

"Do you actually like me?"

he stared at me incredulously "Y/n don't ask me stupid questions. Why would I follow you around and practically throw myself at you if I didn't like you?"

he was blunt about it but I just couldn't believe him.

my doubt must've shown on my face because he suddenly turned me around and pushed me up against the wall.

he was so close I could feel his heartbeat against my back.

"You think I'm playing with you?" he asked me

"Yes" I admitted

"There's no way you'd want me. You don't usually go for girls like me.

he pressed against me more and growled "The fuck do you mean girls like you? "

tears lined my eyes

"Fat girls...chubby ones!" I whispered

after a beat of silence from me and heavy breathing from him...he released me and stepped back.

I still faced the wall. I couldn't bring myself to look at him...I was too scared I was right.

"Y/n look at me" he spoke out.

I remained unmoving

suddenly he tugged the back of my t-shirt causing me to fall back into him.

"You think i dont want you because of your body?” He questioned….his tone soft and careful.

I nodded.

“Or you could want me just for my body….I know you would probably want to sneak around since nobody wants to be seen with me”

I could feel his heartbeat on my back.

He said nothing for a couple seconds and then….

“Should I fuck you and claim you to prove you’re wrong?” He asked bluntly

My body stilled.

“Answer me baby…I need an answer y/n. I won’t touch you if you don’t want it” he rasped out.

I nodded.

And that’s all it took for him to devour my body.

“Let me see your pussy baby” he grunted as he laid me back on the bed.

I clenched my thighs tighter together

What if he hates what he sees

All of a sudden he forced my legs open and used his index to take some of my wetness

Causing me to whimper.

He looked me in my eyes and licked it clean off his fingers.

“You taste better than I could even imagine princess” he moaned out.

Three.

I had three orgasms before he put his dick in me.

I was already a trembling mess but that didn’t stop him from fucking me senseless and giving me two more orgasms.

The blissful look on his face as he marked me everywhere and Painted my walls white with his cum was better than any artwork in any museum.

His body jerked and trembled as he whispered how beautiful and breathtaking he found me.

Slowly he rolled over and laid next to me.

After we came down from the high he realized that we didn’t use protect which I reassure him by telling him I was on the pill.

“No more playing y/n, I fucked you raw. I claimed your pussy and marked your body….tell me your mine.” He as he laid next to me.

“I’m yours” I whispered blissfully

He pecked my cheek “that’s right princess”

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

ANON WHO WAS TALKING ABT WHAT MUSIC SUGURU LISTENS 2 ,,,,,, i pose 2 thee ,,,,,,,, r&b n rap ,,,,,,,,,,,

2 me hes a big kendrick lamar, de la soul, 2pac, aaliyah, alicia keys, erykah badu fan ,,,, just cuz thats who he is 2 me !!! he reminds me of those deep greens, warm browns, n the taste of earth on ur tongue ,,,

but he can appreciate The Classics DEF !!!!!!! he has a big appreciation 4 ALL music me thinks ,,, [and its a personal little hc of mine that he can play bass guitar, drum kit, AND cello ,,, as an orchestra kid ,,,, my opinions r CORRECT] [also hed probably play some rlly low instrument like ,,, tuba or bass clarinet] [satoru would play the trumpet . hed empty his spit valve on sugurus head .] [hed also play violin and be ANNOYINGGG abt it . all violins r annoying asf . [i play violin]]

honestly i think hes just attracted 2 slower, warmer music ,,, like stuff ud listen 2 in the kitchen at 11 pm and the lights a nice warm color and the leftover smell of takeout lingers in the air while you and your lover sit right next 2 each other

OH and satoru would like tyler the creator he was at camp flog gnaw i was there i saw him TRUST [ignore. ignore the racist allegations i free him from those shackles by the power vested in me as a melanated individual] i feel like hed rlly like outkast but only their SUPERR popular stuff, like so fresh, so clean or ms. jackson

also sugurus def a numetal fan . and goth ,,,,,, SUGURU IN TRAD GOTH MAKEUPPP OH MY GOHDDDDDDDDDD and w the piercings ,,,,,,,

going back on him having appreciation 4 all music i mean ALLLLL music . if u go thru his playlists half of them r in languages he doesnt even know but he LOVES them ,,,,, im thinking some songs in yoruba, sanskrit, somali, telugu, spanish, māori, hawaiian ,,,,,,,,,,,

OKI FINAL THING . big Big BIGGGG punk music fan ,,, his whole thing is abt doing whats right for the world and the people around him, and thru that he gets in2 the punk scene !!! yay !!! :3 prob likes bikini kill, xray spex, or the muslims ,,,,

AHHHHHH YOUR BRAIN …….. i’m surrounded by geniuses left and right 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 THIS IS CANON TO ME NOW BTW!!!!

you’re SO right i really think sugu is such a music guy……. loves EVERY kind of music for sure i hadn’t considered rap & rnb until now BUT THAT MAKES SOOOO MUCH SENSE …… “deep greens, warm browns, n the taste of earth on ur tongue” <- THIS IS SO SUGUCODED I CRIED…….

and !!! the classics too !!!! I AGREE SO HARD ON THE INSTRUMENTS i’ve always seen him playing either the bass or the drums but CELLO?????? is so unbelievably bigbrained. plays it for sure. and our pretentious little satoru….. for SURE a violin player and i think piano too. AND TRUMPET PLEASEEE WHY DOES THAT MAKE SM SENSE 😭😭….. he strikes me as the kinda guy who used to listen to nightcore religiously and i think sugu would find that personally offensive to the industry

honestly i think hes just attracted 2 slower, warmer music ,,, like stuff ud listen 2 in the kitchen at 11 pm and the lights a nice warm color and the leftover smell of takeout lingers in the air while you and your lover sit right next 2 each other

YEPPPP YEP ….. you can’t see me but i’m agreeing so hard my hands r shaking THIS IS HIM!!!! slow n warm music …… kitchen music …….. just . dreamy and tender …………. 😔😔😔 he’s so …..

ANDDD i agree on literally everything else too. i only know like half of these artists bc i’m embarrassingly unknowledgeable abt music but i trust your opinion w my life …. oh great orchestra master ………… (that’s so cool btw imho anyone who plays any kind of instrument is the Coolest person in the universe i’m so in awe) HE WOULD SOOO BE IN THE PUNK SCENE …… and he absolutely listens to all kinds of music no matter the language . i can see him picking up bits n pieces from the languages too bc that is our multilingual king 🤞 no matter where he is or who he’s talking to he fits in perfectly w any kind of music-loving crowd…. everyone loves him sb he goes to concerts and makes so many friends without even trying. that’s our guy.

tysm for sharing this w me i’ve decided that you’re objectively correct <333 akutami once said that suguru was “a liberal arts guy for sure” and i think abt it every single day . our artistic king . i love him.

[werebutch]

HAI!!!! HOW WAS YOUR CHRIMMY .. I HOPED IT WAS GOOD!!! :DD I got an axe (that is also a window breaker, knife, and compass and probably more but im fucking stupid), a wolf knife, BASS SKULLCANDY HEADPHONES THAT ARE LITERALLY INSANE, a robot dog LOL, a book about wolves, a mimecraft goat plush, a three days grace shirt, THE WITCHER FOR SWITCH and finally (well I can't remember rn) a vibrator that is a hammer because it made me laugh once and bjørn thought it was too good. HAHAA. and I went to a family Christmas FOR THE FIRST TIME AND IT WAS SO NICE I MET HIS FAMILY AND FELT SOO INCLUDED..T_T I love other rednecks. BAHAHA. <3 look they're in love. (Their son in the center) HOPE YOU HAD A GOOD DAY I LOVE YOU!!!!

Hi bex don’t worry it did send:) YAY!!!!!!! So glad to hear from u ilysm hiiiii wow that sounds so awesome ^__^ THATS SO FUCKING COOL… you got so much cool stuff this year omfg?!?!!seriously.. THATS SO COOL DAWGGG… love the hammer omfg all of these things are so u HAHAH.. HIS as in bjorn or his as in one of ur emo bitches?LMAO THAT SOUNDS SO NICE.. I’m so glad you got to have a good xmas sorry I’m like so happy for u I just don’t even know what to say LOLLLL.. wow that’s a whole family pic so beautiful ♥️♥️ you have to tell me specifically what headphones cuz..omfg.. I want to see how much $…. LOL

My Christmas was pretty nice on Xmas eve we went to my bff’s family’s huuuuge party I had a couple drinks but I did not feel it so that was a little sad cuz I hate alcohol so I drank it for NOTHING!!!!!!BAHAHAH BUT it was fun 😁 they had some really good food.. it was really funny cuz my bff still calls me this random nickname from my animal jam days so I fully had his family members calling me that since that’s all he told them.. so bizarre and funny to hear out loud LOL.

Xmas day my BFFs family got me some stuff but they don’t really know what I like soooHAHA but it’s cute!! I like the bread sponges.. also gave me a couple little things of vodka and rum LOL but yes.. we played a bunch of games and mtg which he’s super into now.. and mostly just chilled out!!! Having a lot of good food lately as well :)

Me and my family had xmas before I left so I will show u my stuff when I get home.. apparently all of it didn’t arrive in time so I will have more when I get back lol^__^

[gib-mir-gift]

making an oc list here cuz i keep forgetting my own fictional people

Julius - manisfestation of depression, anxiety, eating disorders, intrustive thoughts, and just generally everything wrong with me. favourite drawing is of it sitting in a window and waving.

Maximus - julius brother. same routine different font. favourite drawing is of him puppeteering me while singing 'gehenna' by slipknot.

Johannes - the child of krampus. basically krampus jr but a major stoner. favourite drawing is of them smoking while studying a snow globe.

Amsterdam - johannes asshole cat. the soul of their best friend (who was a human named Virgo that died) was moved into his cats body to live on. the cat body got fucked up tho so hes obviously not a normal pet cat. favourite drawing is of his soul moving from his human body to the cat body.

Melodic - think venom meets an alternate from 'the mandela catelogue' (though i created it before i knew what venom was + before tmc came out). way too many teeth, communicates via low hums that sort of mimic human singing. favourite drawing is of it crouching in a door frame.

Brennan Walker - the cringefail loser that melodic loves putting through situations n circumstances n such. think paul matthews from tgwdlm but worse in ways that nmt couldnt even begin to comprehend. favourite drawing is of him lifeless on the floor while melodic looks at him like a kid looking at a bug under a rock.

Flatline - what brennan turns into when melodic finally gets bored. favourite drawing is its existential crisis/joy overload at what its become and the torture from melodic being over.

ZebraSpider - spidersona. deaf trans woman. she can jump over pretty much any building, and her fighting style mimics an aerial silk performance. favourite drawing is of her beating the absolute fuck out of her nemesis.

Mister Formid - zebraspiders nemesis. supernatural ability to control peoples stress levels (can make you feel calm, nervous, euphoric, pure dread, etc etc) just by looking at them. favourite drawing is him getting the absolute fuck beat out of him by zebraspider.

Matthew 'Keys' Köhler - ghostbusters oc. blind in one eye, tattoo sleeve of keys, slut gay autistic enby (they/he) that joined between gb1 and gb2. best friend is winston. faceclaim is ayre gross. favourite drawing is of them sucking face with peter.

Elija Zeddemore - another ghostbusters oc. winstons younger brother, aroace king, plays chess with egon a lot. best friends with janine. faceclaim is corey dorris. favourite drawing is of him unimpressed by winston covered in exploded stay puft marshmallow man.

Umberella - a birman 'cats' oc. best friends with plato and admetus. his human family moved to the area of the junkyard then abandoned him when moving back. he doesnt care cuz he likes the jellicles infinitely more than them. favourite drawing is of him trying to slut it out for skimble during the jellicle ball ('trying' cuz skimble is immune to his flirting).

Nettle - umberellas older sibling. closer to cassandra, alonzo, munkustrap, and demeter but her best friend is bombalurina (who calls him 'nett' which very very conveniently means 'nice'). they spend a lot of time sleeping and sunbathing and literally nothing else

Dugal Jones - pronounced 'doo-gull'. i am cringe but i am free cuz i made this maggotsona to be craigs kid. sampler that also plays bass in their spare time. the most goat/sheep themed lil dude you have ever seen in your life. favourite drawing is of them being taught how to play piano by clown.

Ae'ito - 'avatar' oc. ometicaya hunter. part of tsu'teys close friend group (before tsu'tey died) then became a close friend of mo'at, norm, and max after the clan moved to the mountains. favourite drawing is of her braiding the hair of norms avatar.

Fernweh - my fursona. black, red, yellow, and a very light burgandy coloured sabertooth dog (i have yet to decide the type of dog but their canine features tend to be very german shephard). favourite drawing is of them in a crop top that says "fat men are hot".

i have like 20 other furry ocs that i am entirely too lazy to include here so all youre getting is my fursona lmao

[dgaftilwedie]

Q&A list just for u!!!

What kind of music do you listen to when you write?

Which oc smells the nicest?

What is something you could talk about for 30 min straight with no pauses?

Which oc isn’t the oldest but feels like their the oldest (either in age or when they were created)

If your characters could play any musical instrument, what would they pick?

EEEEEEEE i love questions :33 FEEL FREE TO SEBD MORW LITERALLY CLOG UP MY INBOX

honestly it depends what oc im writing for :33 if im writing for a certain oc, i usually listen to the playlist i made for them. other times i'll hear a song that makes me think of something i wanna write so i'll listen to that. and sometimes i'll just say fuck it n throw a brokencyde album on :3

hm.......... candy or vivica :3 candy smells like her namesake like she smells so so sweet it's like walking into a candy store. vivica smells like........ sexy........ like roses and coffee.......... OH AND ANTON SMELLS PRETTY GOOD TOO he smells like royalty. gold coins, warm velvet, chocolate and raspberries........ and blood :3

trey ^___^ he is my baby. he is my prized possession. his lore goes so much deeper than "my parents hate me" like i will write an entire book about just his lore ALONE if u want me to............

serena is probably the most mature, christophe is up there too but that's just cuz he's ACTUALLY the oldest and he owns the apartment xD serena does a lot of the housework AND they work their own job at night and they help pay for rent and give advice n stuff :3

a lot of my ocs can actually play instruments!! christophe and tyler play guitar, trey plays drums, cass plays bass and she's a singer, anton plays the harp, vivica plays the violin, serena plays piano, and zowie plays the kazoo. as for the others, kenna wants to learn how to use a synthesizer, sera wants to learn how to play guitar but she's super lazy, and candy's learned how to play a couple songs on the piano cuz serena's been teaching her :33

[kill-the-rockstar]

It's Waterparks album release day baby! And you know what that means!

It's time for

Kill The Rockstar Reacts To Music: Intellectual Property by Waterparks

Starf*cker

- It makes me wonder about the album, is it the story if one relationship? Or a Midnights kinda thing where it's about different moments throughout his life?

- The chorus especially feels how it feels to work on a show - I don't know how else to describe it, and 'it just hurts cuz I want it'

Real Super Dark

- The link from the end of Starf*cker is cool

- Going from 'it's been a pleasure, its nice to meet you' to 'everyone's freaking me out' is a very cool contrast

Funeral Grey

- It's funky fun, it feels like Double Dare grown up, I love it

- The spelling makes me ask if the woman he's talking to is British, and I also think we need to focus more on the fact her FAVOURITE COLOUR is fucking GREY???

- Awsten's flirting techniques being 'what's your favourite colour' 'smoking is carcinogenic' 'fuck me' is hilarious to me

Brainwashed

- I was obsessed the minute this came out

- I love playing this on bass, the timing is really nice and I like playing with the dynamics between the verse and chorus

- Falling fast for someone like that sounds terrifying, can't relate but I love the concept

- Looking at your crush and going 'why??' is absolutely a mood

2 Best Friends

- The next time I go out with my two besties the guy I've had a crush on twice is also meant to be there and something about that feels perfect for this song even though we're friends now and I literally invited him

- The synth sounds liked Glitter Times!!!

- I like this because even if I don't get like this about romance, 'it didn't work and I feel like shit. Wake up tomorrow and try again' is very much applicable to me. Shit sucks, things don't magically get better overnight, but fuck it we keep going.

End of the water (feel)

- The chorus feels like having a crush. It's like my heart is reaching out.

- The verse sounds like what goes on in my brain a lot of the time - maybe I do have ADHD..

- It's such an emotional song and my jaw literally dropped

- and then at the ernd you have FUCKING KURTIS CONNOR I burst out laughing it's 1am fuck

Self Sabotage

- I don't know what to say, it's a good song

- I think we're all guilty of self sabotaging behaviour to some degree but it's very interesting to hear someone else describe their experiences with it

Ritual

- something about it is reminiscent of the music I loved as a child - I've been into alternative music since I was born, and I can't quite place what it is but there's a nostalgia to it for me

- it's the equivalent of Tantrum orr Turbulent I guess but it feels so different

- the reference to Lemonade >>>>

Fuck About It

- The contrast between Ritual talking about his trauma and how he feels he's being taken advantage of, then Fuck About It being about a relationship where its just about sex because the other party doesn't want to communicate with him (and then that in contrast to Self Sabotage where its him who keeps trying to push her away)

- It's a fun song but as usual, I am left wanting to give Awsten a hug and stroke his hair like he's a cat if I think about the lyrics too long

Closer

- This ripped my heart out

- 'I feel love a different way' as someone who's a-spec that hit me hard.

- I have been here I have felt this

- 2000's pop punk vibes, reminiscent of All Time Low (I do not support ATL🖕) - reminds me of listening to Last Young Renegade on my sunset walks during lockdown

- The quiet, almost whispered final chorus!!!

A Night Out On Earth

- religious trauma ❤️

- 'A night out on earth, last one for a while, it can't get worse' just makes me think of my last night out before lockdown which was the end of a three year friendship.

Anyway.

- ending the album with audio from one of their early radio interviews is not making me emotional at all /s

[twildflower]

yapping abt guitars...makes me want to write a fic abt bands. n some fic plans.

...it is crazy how cool someone looks playing the bass when they're your type it is craaaazy...i need to stop getting crushes on people so easily gahhh

i think playing drums or guitars is really cool in general but holy shit. when someone your type is playing it?? makes it like 100 times cooler. this is some shit youd never understand if you never experienced it. like. im so down bad i need to stop being delusional.

anyway im planning to write a fic ive been thinking abt for a while. red gold stuff. this ship is probably my fav over reguri atp. originally i wrote more regold stuff just bc i was like reguri has a big enough fanbase i want rarepair food but its grown on me like crazy.

whoops ran off topic okay. the fic is dead dove first of all. im very deranged i love dead doves. and its gonna be streamer au!!!! i kinda hate pokemon fanfics cuz people always just write stuff thats like within the lore with no au. like. cmon guys. its not even that hard. hey if you're reading this and you wanna write, what about a knight and prince and they just still have pokemon. like idk the knights have dragon pokemons for protecting their kingdoms and the prince could have a soulblade or smth im sorry if i misspelled the name. i mean the one amethio has in horizons. idk. or some fancy ahh pokemon. it's literally so easy but no one writes any mixed aus just cuz pokemon already is like an au. :(

mew hen adhd brain uhhh yeah an then its really my own kinks hehe. its like regold basically fucking on stream but like also not. no ones reading this but i think its funny to not spoil esp when i havent even started on it yet. i love having 8153728( ideas but write too shit to make good fics. please knock on my head and it will give you a very awesome original prompt if youre in creators block or whatever if you just dont know what you want ahsgsjbshsh

[shoppingshoppingshoppingshopping]

Listen/purchase: I'm Sorry That Happened so Fast by Local Teen

OK new album write up time.

Well, it looks like I screwed up the release date and set it for september 2023 when it was supposed to be september 2024. so the question is will it always be out of order for the rest of time or will i be able to fix it at some point?

cdbaby as usual has awful support and still hasn't gotten back to me to fix the date. why is support so bad everywhere? anyway....

I was doing all the boring technical stuff as i thought it was ready and then cdbaby rejected my files. apparently they don't take 96k audio. so now i am opening up each session and having to re-render at 44/16. Which is a total drag cuz now i have to relisten to the entire album again. I love most of these songs but i am also so damn sick of them now after hearing them 1000 times.

all these songs except the neat neat neat cover are from 2019. Meaning I started them then. Many were just chords and maybe a melody. A few had lyrics and were mostly done except needed clean up and a mix.

ok so first song,

away from home: this one I think I had almost everything except lyrics. All those were recorded this year. This album took forever to put together. I think I finally sat down and decided to finish it right after I released the last one. Lemme check. Oh crap that was december 2023! Damn I take forever. Or not. I know what I like and i get pickier as time goes on. I guess this is just what it takes.

I am finding I have less desire to polish old songs that don't have much to grab me. Like one of the ones in this pile was this really cool bass line and drums. I've spent maybe 20 hours trying to shape it into a song and I haven't figured out yet how to do that. There are a few like this. A few albums back I wouldn't give up and would eventually find it. But I dunno. It's just so much effort and pain. When I have literally 100s of songs that will come together easier when I finally get to them. So I'm wondering why bother.

Another lesson is that album of unfinished songs I put out. A few of those will come on my spotify shuffle and now I can hear exactly how to finish them. So the lesson there is wait. It might come. If not? that's OK. This is life. Ya gotta let go sometimes. There is pain in making music/art. It's uncomfortable. The hard part is figuring out what kind of torture is good and what isn't.

Anyway, Away from home has lyrics about a violent cartel crime situation. I love crime movies. I just rewatched michael clayton again for the 10th time? it's so good. Pulp fiction too. Which took a while to pull me in but after the overdose I was in all the way and didn't want to leave it. Butch's girlfriend isn't as bad as Bill Simmons says she is. In fact she's just fine. John Maclane yelling to himself in the car felt a little forced very "acting".

BTW it's taking at least 20 minutes just to open the 3rd song session. I think there's over 250 tracks in there.

Listening back. Away from home chorus is sooooo good. I couldn't stop myself from recording this really jazzy harmonies. My music theory talk sounds like I know something but really I aint shit but I think there's like 9ths and 7ths and diminished somethings in there.

I played the broken cello I got from craigslist free on this. Some wood glue and a jerry rigged "clamp" using ratchet tie downs and it's playable. I have no idea how to play the cello but I was able to get some good sounds out of it for this song.

2: use a hoe

this is kinda funny. i found an earlier version of this. Spent MONTHS on it. Then towards the end of wrapping up the album figured I needed one more song. Went into the next batch of unfinished songs and found this version. I thought it was so much better. It was completely done except for some clean up and much needed mix changes.

lyrics are about some of the poor folks I spent a lot of time around when I lived in florida. when people say "i don't get trump voters" I always think "Ah you never spent any meaningful time with different kinds of people."

this is one of the negatives of tiered experiences like fast pass at an amusement park or anything not general admission at an event. a society is better when different people mix in positive ways over a shared enjoyment.

It's funny that this is bragging now but my florida experience gave me bonds with fresh off the boat Hatians, Cubans and pretty much all of latin America, not to mention kids whose family have definitely been at a KKK BBQ before (or maybe it was just a rumor that everyone that lived near moon lake was KKK. I dunno. I was too scared to go) and just all sorts of people with lots of debt, loyalty to the strangest things, strong family bonds hidden under resentment and the types of folks the media just never ever shows you.

Lower Middle Class life just isn't romantic. There's a fair amount of substance use, lots of humor, missing teeth and bad tattoos on even worse skin. That doesn't make for good streaming content. One lady I knew had no front teeth and her car was literally infested with roaches. You'd see them crawling all over the seats at any time of day. how the florida heat didn't kill them? I have no idea. Also if her car was like this what was her trailer for of kids like?

Who are they going to cast to depict her in a show? Glenn Close? She has the face of a shoe that only rich people know about.

i'm solid to maybe upper middle class now but those folks still exist inside me like guardian angels. They write a lot of my lyrics. I get them but i also resent them for not doing what i would do. not that that's right, but just reporting from subconscious.

When I was 16 working in fast food, I worked with a 40 year woman named BJ. She said it was short for something like "Billie gives the best blow jobs". Kids, the 90s were wild. or maybe just florida or both. This lady also was kind of illiterate and her kid names on his birth certificate was "BRAIN" no Brian. I hope she's doing well but I doubt it. The world has changed in a way that hasn't been protective of folks like that. That's just sad. I liked these people. We worked together as team. There is a special bond you gain when working on a time crunchy environment. I hope they made it out of poverty OK or least didn't go lower.

3: send the girls over

This was one of those songs I couldn't stop writing. It was so inspiring. So many ideas and lyrics. I saw a songwriting friend recently and told him I wanted to be better at lyrics. Then I went back to finish this song and saw that I'm not crap. I can pull it off sometimes. Cuz I am so proud of these lines:

so you didn't want to lie yet we did watch it grow that thing upon your face that drips when you get cold that looks down on the poor turns up when you get old through which you soon will pay for sticking it where it surely doesn't go

Keith Hopkin of The Blue Album Group and Asobi seksu sang on the woah parts. I love his voice. We used to be in a Weezer cover band together.

So did my nephews, probably the missus as well. I had anyone that came over sing on those woahs for a few weeks.

I just love this song. Listening to it now the "I knew it was you part" still gives me chills. I also played the trumpets on this. I don't know how to play at all. Yet I was so inspired that when I hit record and blew my heart out and ya know what? the right notes just came out! I WAS FUCKING FEELIN' IT! God is good, man. I'm tellin' you.

That's the magic of music, man. It can make you do stuff you can't usually do. It's like a super power. I can feel my version of god in this moment. Thank you universe for the gift to stick with this craft and to keep trying to make songs I like. And thank you for the love I get to feel for myself when I hear what I made.

Ok now I feel exposed.

I'm pretty sure there's 250+ tracks in this. It became impossible to work on because it uses more resources than my computer can handle. But nevertheless he persisted.

4: come on baby

there's a version with 3 other parts not in this one. They were more metal/butt rock than I like. So I wrote all new parts. And then ended up redoing everything. Vocally I was trying to find the right voice then heard a DFA1979 song and thought "oh I should try that".

My les paul through my orange tiny terror is the perfect guitar tone for this kind of song. Its my favorite amp/gtr combo just because when it's right it's just perfect. It's just not always right for each song.

5: why start now - a classic vibe of "why bother? let's get ta slackin'". feels very 90s to me.

I love my funky bass lines. I feel like I should show them off more cuz I do some pretty cool stuff sometimes.

You know what's very un 90s? The amount of self love I have for my work as I write this today. It took lots of therapy, will power and the desire to change to get here. Don't get me wrong I hear the "you suck" voice daily. Just now I thought "you're being really honest here. We feel vulnerable. don't do this" then another voice said "no one listens to your music and never will so who cares?". Then another voice said, "just be in your creative space and flow. this is a gift to have this. so many people wish they could make things. you're lucky".

This song had a completely different feel. Then I went on a dancehall trip with my spotify deep dives and realized I should try that. Re did the drums. Then realized lots of other stuff needed to be redone but cause it didn't work with my new groove. so yeah, this is a dancehall song. for me.

6: neat neat neat - i made this in like a week towards the end of my last album. it came together to quickly. i put it on there but then went i went to release it Landr was like "no covers otherwise you can't make any money from ANY of the other songs on the album".

So I am putting it on this one since I am using CDbaby to release this one and they won't ding all the other album tracks if they get lots of youtube streams.

Keith Hopkin sang on this too!

7: What we are

I have a slight headache. I probably have covid. this morning I had a million great ideas for a new song I am working on. I was also so excited to do all this admin work to release my new album. but now I just feel so scattered and can't wait for this to be over.

first line is something i remember steve albini saying in an interview when asked about movies or tv shows. talk about yucking someones yum! i often have to turn steve off in my head when i am watching something mediocre. i can see the acting and just how silly it all is.

i used a lot of 1176 compressors on the first version of this. ended up removing nearly all except on the gtrs. i dunno why but that thing never worked for me. I have friend that loves it. I don't like his drum sounds. but i get that it's a classic sound.

8: use a hoe slower

spent a long time trying to get this one to work. i like it's chill vibes.

Do I sing about being dead or alive a lot? I think I sang something similar on another song on this album. I dunno. I make a lot of music. I'm bound to repeat myself

Ok i'm done. I just did a proof reading pass about a week later. I definitely have covid. I toggle between dizzy, tired, confused, hungry and inspired to make dance music. I've started 3 tracks with beats and basslines and then stop. That's fine. It takes a lot of practice to get good at a new genre.

[audio-luddite]

Got me thinking about CDs.

We had a brief exchange in the comments on an earlier post on how streaming is not that good, but there is high res available the rest is CD level or worse. So how good are CDs if they are a benchmark of being not good enough? That leads to the question are there any Audiophile Quality CDs?

I repeat my basic premise that there is no perfect system. There are flaws with every method. It is literally a "pick your poison" situation.

So are there any Audiophile CDs? Cut to the chase yes. Perfect no, of course not. I have one spinning right now it is excellent. Tiny details deep bass incredible ambience.

BACK STORY: Decades ago my system was an OP-Amp preamp, a very good Sony 2251 Turntable with a Shure V15 III, a pair of modified Dynaco MK III tube amps, and huge full range electrostatic speakers. I built the speakers, so do not ask what model. My CD player was a second generation Philips consumer model. Nothing to brag about there.

Even then I read reviews and stuff, but online was in the distant future. Real paper magazines. There was a review of an interconnect cable between a high end CD unit (don't recall which type) and his preamp. It came down to this one cable and only this one allowed the reviewer to hear this specific tiny obscure detail on this particular CD.

This was a key moment in my High End Audio education. Cuz I could hear that sound. I had that CD. If that sound was a benchmark in a high end system did that mean I had a high end system? And my CD player and preamp together cost less than this interconnect. I have no doubt he heard what he heard, as I could hear what I could hear. So it was not the wire was it?

That CD was Cowboy Junkies from Ontario Canada "Trinity Sessions" recorded in Toronto in a Church space copyright 1988.

I am listening to it now and it has everything an honest audiophile needs. Tiny details, great bass, natural sound recorded in the most straightforward way. It has a deserved reputation and is celebrated as a good one. It is so good they issued 180 gram LPs of it decades later.

If you are familiar with the CD or the LP you have heard "the sound" if your system is worthy. It is way back in the soundstage on the first cut. Like I said if you have the recording you know what it is.

Of course the recording is not just that actually silly detail. The band was set up around an ambisonic 3d microphone (one mike!) on risers in the church. Much of the Bass is the really deep resonance of the musicians tapping their feet on the risers. The Drum is actually a higher pitch. It is a sonic candy store. There is no studio magic, the space is real. If there are digital artifacts I simply do not care.

One of my favourite test cuts is number 11) Post Card Blues. The voice incredible. The Harmonica backing is epic. The Bass is crazy deep without the drums. I honestly find myself swapping my attention between the simple sounds and the songs themselves.

One classic track is number 10) Sweet Jane. Lou Reed is on record as this being the best cover of his song ever. Talk about a document. It's playing right now. Great high hat in the drum kit.

OH yes I bought the LPs and love to play them. The sound is wonderful there too. The master is digital on to video tape as there were no computers fast enough back then. So if you got digital artifacts well there is no cure. Pure not analog.

I have other CDs this good. They all depend on the recording engineer and mastering to be correct.

My Player is not top tier, but I still get this stuff out. What does that actually mean then. Hmmmm.

Yes I prefer vinyl, I respect good recordings. Is the LP version better, errr yes to my ear. It is preference like a favourite flavour of ice cream. Either is worthy.