#;; hanzo just wanted to pet the cute dog... ;;

[cyberrat]

72nd Batch Of Fics: 5th Fill

Hanzo/Cassidy – Trucker AU – Part 39 – The boys come to a decision of what to do now. Hanzo and Genji are once again like cats and dogs.

---

Genji’s eyes travel to Cassidy, looking him up and down. For a wild moment Cole got the urge to suck his gut in or something but he can shake that off pretty quick. He’s an old, fat fuck… what does he need to impress a twenty-something slut for?

Genji looks him up and down, then looks back to his brother.

“You need help with him or something?” he asks so matter-of-fact that Cole almost starts laughing. He wants to say that he could crush them by sitting on their scrawny necks but honestly he’s not too sure about the things Hanzo is actually capable of, being an ex yakuza, so he just stays silent and watches as Hanzo shakes his head profusely, the color under his skin becoming more vibrant.

Genji shrugs his shoulders and starts to relax quite a bit.

“Can’t believe father would’ve just let you go like that.”

“He didn’t. I’m… being followed.”

That gets the kid’s attention. He becomes pretty pale – more than he was before – but Cole steps in before that can escalate.

“A friend of mine took care of that. He’s on the lookout for any and all activity. So far nothing cropped up. Should be fine.”

Genji stares at him for a while, eyes narrowing. For as unlike the brothers are, that look is so much Hanzo, it amuses Cole quite a bit. He eventually looks back to his brother, jerking his chin toward Cole.

“Who exactly is he? Not just your pimp, I guess.”

Hanzo groans softly. It is his turn to rub his hands over his face a few times, gathering his thoughts. “He’s an ex cop. His friend is still in the force and apparently got quite a few connections. I… trust the both of them.”

Genji’s eyes bug out, his mouth turning into an ‘o’ of surprise and dismay.

“A… a cop? Are you crazy?”

“Ex cop,” Cole throws in smoothly. “Don’t look like that. Nowadays I’m more interested in your brother’s pussy anyway.”

That gets both to shut up and look a little green around the gills. The quiet that descends on them all is so uncomfortable that even Cassidy starts to feel it. Eventually he drawls: “Look. You wanna come with us or not? Won’t be able to take ya around indefinitely, but I can give you a ride to somewhere else.”

“What? No. Why would I leave? This is my home.”

Hanzo sits up a bit straighter, frowning. “I don’t like you being here. This place is… not good for you. You look one bad decision away from an overdose. How do you even get the money for this place?”

He looks around. The apartment is not exactly luxurious but it’s pretty nice all in all. Genji’s face shuts down like someone pushed a button – which Hanzo very probably did. Cole can see this whole thing going sideways very fast.

“That’s none of your business. Why should I come with you? I ain’t sitting my ass on his dick. I got some standards.”

Hanzo flushes again, his hands curling into fists on his knees.

“I came all this way to find you and you just-”

“Listen,” Cole interjects again, shifting away from the wall he’s been leaning at to come closer and into the blast radius of the both of them. “Nobody said you gotta sit on anybody’s dick. If ya wanna stay here, it’s your call. But I got an idea I think ya might like.”

They both look at him now, eyes narrowed in distrust. Well ouch.

“That buddy of mine is a good guy. Helped us out quite a bit. Could use a bit more compensation than what we gave him so far, ya know? He likes cute things; an’ you’re pretty cute, I guess. So… wanna be someone’s pet for a while?”

Genji stares at him but he does not explode on him like he would have expected Hanzo to do so… that’s definitely a plus. He’s interested and curious, Cole can see that much.

“Here. If that helps your decision any…”

He pulls out his phone and drops down on the couch next to Genji who grunts in surprise as he gets bounced and lands against his side. Cole pretends like he doesn’t notice Hanzo’s mouth pulling down in a jealous pout but he definitely does notice… and enjoys it quite a bit.

Little slut is not as cool as he likes to pretend. He wants to be daddy’s favorite girl.

Cole smirks at his phone while he searches through it. Genji either notices Hanzo’s reaction as well or he’s just as much of a slut for old bastards because instead of moving away, he leans into Cole and just unashamedly stares at his phone screen.

“Here. That’s a picture of him.” He finally found one of the last time he’s seen Hog. Incidentally it is of the time he got his cock sucked by Hanzo who is almost unrecognizable with his face stuffed beneath the massive overhang of his belly.

Still, Genji’s eyes nearly bug out of his face when he stares at it, then at his brother, then back at the picture. He grabs the phone out of Cole’s hand without asking and zooms in closer to stare at the side of Hanzo’s face, cheeks blotchy red and throat bulging from the massive cock stuffed in it.

He briefly looks up at Hanzo, giving him a look that has him look suspiciously between his brother and Cole, but then starts to move around the picture more to look at the rest of Rutledge.

Eventually, he clears his throat and gives Cole the phone back.

“I mean… I don’t mind a little vacation.”

Hanzo scoffs, his face dark and broody. “You behave like I am just doing this to inconvenience you. I am merely looking out for you since it is unlikely father will give up so easily.”

“I mean… if you hadn’t actively searched for me, they wouldn’t have found me,” Genji comments.

Cole can feel the tension in the room immediately going up as Hanzo’s back stiffens and he hisses: “If I found you, they would have found you eventually as well. It wasn’t hard, you know!”

“You only found me ‘cause you sucked my dick in a dirty restroom, you idiot!”

Hanzo’s mouth snaps shut with an audible click, hectic red dots appearing on his cheeks.

“I simply want to protect you.”

“After you nearly killed me, you mean? That’s the reason I left there in the first fucking place!”

The silence after that is deafening. Cole rubs his hands over his face with a groan. “Come on, boys. Just… let bygones be bygones and get going. Daddy’s got a lotta errands to run and figure out where to drop you off so Mako can pick you up.”

That at least gets their attention on him. Genji, eyes suddenly twinkling quite maliciously, jumps up and curls his arms around Cole’s arm, pressing himself against his side.“Oh, daddy, yes? I like that. You don’t need to worry about me. I’ll be the best passenger you’ve ever had. Nice and quiet and all that. And very… very… eager.” He grins up at Cole. Hanzo gets up on stiff legs but wisely does not say anything. He looks like he bit into a lemon, though.

[madirablack]

More random overwatch headcanons

(Let me know if you want ones for specific characters or anything)

Jamison is scared shitless of dogs but won't ever admit it. Mako finds it cute.

Ashe has trouble with her hearing and wears those invisible in-ear hearing aids.

Gabe was a surprisingly good cook and always used it to one-up Jack.

Torbjorn and Brigitte used to go fishing a lot when she was younger, they still meet up to do it together on his birthday.

Moira's desire to explore experimental and unstable areas of science and medicine caught the attention of many, and talon began to contact her, offering an obscene amount of funding for research and a lab full of expensive tech nobody had even thought of , in return for her to infiltrate overwatch and leak their plans and sensitive information. She accepted. Nobody quite caught on as to why there was always a team of talon soldiers ready to meet them whenever a mission landed.

Genji lost his senses of taste and light touch after the incident.

Siebren can often be found sat on a windowsill with a cup of tea levitating beside him while he reads a book.

Lena always checks on everyone whenever she can, just because she wants to make sure they're okay.

Hanzo is an alcoholic and hasn't tried to stop. It's the only coping mechanism he developed.

Jesse started smoking when he was 16 and has tried to stop multiple times, longest was for a year when he first joined overwatch.

Amélie has a stash of old photos that she looks at before bed, trying to feel something but never can.

Hana loves spicy food, despite her face going red and her nose steaming while she eats it.

Ana would make Fareeha mint cookies when she was a kid. She made them for her again after they reunited and they finally managed to talk again. Mint is a comfort scent for both of them because of this.

Both of the shimada brothers feel guilty about what happened.

When Genji started to open up more and talk to others, it progressed quite quickly and he grew close with a lot of people.

Jesse's parents were never really parents, more like people he lived with. They had no sense of responsibility, no jobs and didn't provide him with what he needed. He was often cold, hungry and dirty. He managed to run away when he was 14 and they didn't even file a police report.

Jack is scared to fall asleep at this point because the nightmares are every night.

Ashe and Jesse managed to be on good terms after the events of 'reunion', and often write letters to each other about where they've been and what the best food is around there.

Although he cannot really smile, Zenyatta's giggling is the most infectious and adorable sound known to man.

Mei takes caution when meeting others and maintaining friendships, she doesn't want to care about others too heavily for them all to die again.

Symmetra tried very hard to hide her autistic habits as a child, as she was raised to believe that there was something wrong and awful about her. She later realised this was bullshit and that autistic people are to be loved and respected.

Zarya loves dogs and has 2 of her own, named after her siblings that were killed when omnics attacked Russia.

Angela has fallen down the stairs in the base more times than she can count due to perpetual sleep deprivation.

Jesse plays guitar in his spare time and likes a lot of classic rock, (thanks to Gabe) and his favourite song to play is Layla. [Give it a listen if you haven't already, it's a banger]

Jamison has an old, ratty, dirty teddy bear that he had with him ever since the explosions in Australia when he was a kid. He talks to it sometimes. His name is Dave.

Ana can drink Reinhardt under the table.

Brigitte made Reinhardt a cusion with a lion on it, and he won't stop talking about it.

Lucio is trans.

Fareeha had a pet lizard growing up.

Lena is a part of the small amount of brits that actually hate the taste of tea.

The third friday of the month was always movie night, and whoever wasn't on missions would make it, those who were would join in halfway through and fall asleep on the couch.

Mei is incredibly insecure about her chronological age.

Jack, Reinhardt, Ana, Siebren, Angela and Jesse all give amazing hugs.

At his wedding, Gabe threw up on his dad's shoes.

[rorykillmore]

posting up a birthday gift fic for @alula !!! aka i decided to ambush them by not telling them i usually do this for my friends’ birthdays until like yesterday, but it’s the same idea! this is basically just like 1000+ words of gay introspection for our one villaneve rp verse, but one time they attacked me w something they wrote re: eve trying to tell villanelle she loves her while the latter was sleeping and i guess i just filed that away in the back of my brain until i could find a way to get revenge.

anyway a few nice words: i hope you have a great birthday scully!!! and. this might sound like a very low bar bc 2020 has been awful for all of us i’m sure, but meeting you and becoming friends has genuinely ended up one of the brightest highlights of my year and i’m so glad we stumbled across each other bc we both wanted someone to yell about ke with.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! 

‘Feelings that can’t be put into words’ has never sounded like anything but a challenge to Villanelle. There are 6,500 different languages in the world. It stands to reason that if you can’t find the words you’re want in one of them, you just have to look somewhere else. 

The problem is -- she knows the words she wants to say to Eve. She has them. They exist in all 6,500 of those languages.

She’s already said them once.

She wonders to herself, over and over:  if she said them again, would they ruin everything a second time?

The textbook definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. So Villanelle tries - in every way she knows how - not to be the same person she was before. Not to make the same mistakes.

“I want to tell you something,” Villanelle murmurs, catching Eve by the hand. It’s late, and they’ve just dropped Jin Ling off at his new apartment and packed it full of food and clothes (Villanelle had wanted to make sure he had clothes) and dog toys in preparation to move him in. Eve looks as tired as Villanelle feels when she turns back towards her, but the look in her eyes is as alert and questioning as it always is when she’s giving Villanelle her attention.

I’m listening. I’m usually listening when it comes to you,  Eve had told her once, and, I spent a ton of time listening to you before you even talked to me, and Villanelle had tucked all of those words away somewhere close to her heart.

They make Villanelle hesitate now, on the verge of something not for the first time.

(The first time had been the first night they’d spent together, in between the heated kisses Villanelle had trailed across her skin and in the contented quiet afterwards. Or after that, the night Eve had spent curled up in her lap after Villanelle had wiped away the tears she hadn’t quite understood in the moment.)

She deludes herself, in those few seconds in which Eve’s eyes meet her’s, that she’ll say it this time. But her throat starts to feel dry, and instead --

“I think I am starting to enjoy it.” Villanelle swallows and offers a crooked smile. “This... helping people?”

It isn’t a lie. So that’s something. It’s not the rush or the elation she remembers she used to get when she was hurting people -- it’s more like a quiet, contemplative sort of ache in her chest. She doesn’t know why she likes it. Maybe it’s the novelty of it all. 

Maybe it’s the way Eve looks at her now, the way she almost seems to soften at the edges. It wasn’t what Villanelle wanted to say, but the unguarded way Eve smiles back at her and doesn’t let go of her hand, it makes Villanelle decide that maybe it was worth it anyway.

It’s not as though she doesn’t have plenty of other chances.

She and Eve see each other nearly every day now. Most mornings start with them waking up together, and most evenings end with one of them outside the other’s door (or window, when it comes to Villanelle’s preferred method of entry). Villanelle starts to wonder how well she’d sleep in an empty bed, she’s gotten so used to tucking herself against Eve’s back, slinging an arm around her waist. She wouldn’t dare call it domestic, or normal, or any of the things Villanelle knows she can’t have and would never try to force Eve into.

But it’s... them. All the heat and passion and intensity Villanelle already knows so well, but also all of the smaller things that she is still learning that somehow feel equally a part of whatever they are. 

So it’s not as though the opportunities aren’t there. It’s just that it never feels like the right time.

She doesn’t want to scare Eve off or bring all their memories of Rome back into the forefront, and above all else, she doesn’t want to lie to her. Or to herself. And no matter how certain Villanelle is that she’s never felt this way about anyone else in her life, or that she wouldn’t have thrown her life as an assassin away and risked the terrifying reality of not knowing who she is for anyone but Eve, or that she might actually choose to die before ever hurting Eve again, she... can’t be sure that any of that counts as love. Because she doesn’t know what love looks like, or what it feels like, she doesn’t know if she really was wrong the last time she said it and she doesn’t know who to ask.

You don’t understand what that is. 

I want to, Villanelle thinks she should have said. I’m trying. I’m sorry. I’ll find a way to make it better, just know that I’m trying.

But that hadn’t been how Rome had ended. And since then, so much has happened, and Villanelle has had to ask herself so many unpleasant questions that she once would have preferred not to ever think about at all, but... 

Maybe that’s a part of it. Of trying. Because after she’d gone home to her family, to her mother, she’d almost forgotten that it was worth trying at all, and Eve had reminded her so effortlessly just by showing up here, in this strange, dreamlike alternate reality. And that has to mean something, doesn’t it? That Eve always makes her want to try?

That Eve takes her coffee black (sometimes), that she raised venus fly traps as a kid and loved a girl in college, that she had a chicken for a pet and loves cute newborn kittens and scrawny stray cats, and that she thrives on the arguments she pretends to hate, that she cares about people even when they’ve done very bad things, that she’s fighting all the time to figure herself out, to know herself, that it scares her all the time but that she does it anyway. All of that means something to Villanelle. She wants to find the words for how much she cares about every part of Eve that Eve ever lets her see, and they’re right there, Villanelle knows that, just --

She never knew that ‘knowing’ and ‘saying’ could be such complicated different things.

So what’s there to do, Villanelle decides, shying away from paralyzing nerves that don’t at all become her, except keep trying? 

“I want to tell you something,” she murmurs again a few days later, this time into the place where the slope of Eve’s neck meets her shoulder, where Villanelle can hide her face.  She knows that’s cheating, though, and eventually stretches out and lifts her head and props herself up on one elbow, smiling languidly down at Eve in an effort to pretend that her heart isn’t nearly beating out of her chest.

This time, it’s the morning after they’ve officially defined their... relationship. Villanelle has tried to play it cool, really - she had laughed and was appropriately incredulous when Eve had confessed she’d been texting Hanzo about them, of all people - but she’s also spent the last twelve hours (or what she’s spent of them awake and coherent and not preoccupied by Eve herself, anyway) tossing around the word girlfriend in her head like some giddy teenager.  

Eve, perhaps hoping Villanelle is about to reveal a similarly embarrassing story about someone she has consulted for advice about their relationship, raises her eyebrows expectantly. “Don’t hold me in suspense.”

“I...” Villanelle falters again. Swallows. Tries to fight off an inward surge of frustration at herself, because that will definitely ruin the moment. And maybe some of it shows on her face, in her eyes, some vulnerability or fear or just how much she feels for Eve, because Eve’s bemusement softens into something more like concern.

“Villanelle --” Eve reaches up, and Villanelle feels the warmth of her hand against her cheek. She remembers the first time, what feels like so long ago back in Eve’s kitchen when this very same gesture was used to disarm. Now it feels... different, and Villanelle leans into her touch without even really thinking  about it. “ -- It’s okay. You can tell me.”

Villanelle knows Eve too well not to sense her nerves. Maybe she’s already guessed what Villanelle wants to say, or maybe she hasn’t and it’s the uncertainty that’s killing her, but she waits for Villanelle anyway, tells her that it’s okay anyway, doesn’t prompt or push her or try to deflect. 

And inexplicably it’s not a big fireworks moment, but this small, singular instance of selfless, uncharacteristic patience that makes Villanelle certain. Or maybe she always has been, and it’s just that she needs Eve there in front of her, both their guards dropped, for it to feel tangible. 

Villanelle doesn’t know what she is or isn’t, whether her mother and the Twelve and everyone who’s ever told her what she’s supposed to be were right or wrong, but she knows that she loves Eve. If there was ever a person she was capable of shattering every expectation and defying all the odds to love, it’d be Eve. And if she can’t quite bring herself to say it yet... that doesn’t make it any less true.

She covers the hand resting against her cheek with her own and turns her head just enough to press a feather-light kiss to the inside of Eve’s palm, barely able to hide a smile when some of Eve’s quiet apprehension seems to melt. Then for good measure - and because she can’t stop herself - she leans down and kisses Eve properly, slow and somehow unhurried despite every feeling she is determined to pour into it.

And she hadn’t meant to linger, but Eve kisses her back without hesitating, and Villanelle’s always found it difficult to resist getting lost in her. So she gives in, doesn’t resist, and like always with Eve, finds there is something strangely grounding in letting herself get lost. She hopes Eve feels it too. She hopes that - for right now - it’s enough.

“I’ll tell you later,” Villanelle murmurs against her lips once she’s just barely pulled away, and tries to make it sound like a promise.

[overdrivels]

Free as a bird

“How’d a guy like you get a name like ‘Sparrow’ anyways?” 

The question doesn’t come as a surprise to Genji, especially not after the latest fight he had with his brother. The memory of the fight is not as raw as he anticipated. It’s almost laughable now. 

In just ten years Genji nearly forgot just how childish Hanzo could be sometimes. No, he never forgot--he just never noticed it in the first place, too focused on living his life and getting away from the stifling control of his family. 

Hanzo has always been like that, getting hung up over the stupidest things like the perceived favoritism in the form of a single word. Sometimes he can't believe he had such anger toward someone as petty as his brother. (Though anyone would be angry at nearly losing their life.) 

Genji turns away from McCree, staring out past the balcony of the seedy hotel. 

Yes, the same type of seedy hotels that Genji would have found himself getting dragged out of by his angry brother. 

Going back home is always a bit of a spectacle. The morning would still be gray and the streets filled with the elderly and people who have to walk their dogs or other pets in the morning. Very few people dare look the racoon-eyed Hanzo in the face (especially if he had a fist curled in Genji's shirt collar--if he was lucky enough to have one on), subtly making way for the two Shimada heirs and the occasional guard who trails along, pretending to do their job. 

It’s a routine almost as old as his puberty. 

Genji would fuck off in the middle of the night after training, hanging out with whatever ‘friends’ were fearless enough to accompany the second Shimada heir to a club or bar or whatever he felt like doing that night. It would be near dawn before Hanzo would bust in, signalling the end of his fun. Genji never really knew how Hanzo found him--he was so sure to destroy any tracking devices he found on his belongings (sometimes dumping everything but his underwear and pants into the river all together, sometimes putting it on a stray dog or a bird, always checking and making sure his fun cannot end early). Genji chalked it up to ‘mysterious older brother senses’. Either way, Hanzo would drag him back home to their father. 

This time was no different than any other. 

The two of them stood in his father’s office, Hanzo at attention and Genji still yawning with his pants unbuttoned and Y-shirt crumpled from people grabbing at it. Without even a greeting, their father waved his hand at Hanzo in dismissal.

「You may go.」

Obediently, Hanzo bowed, taking his leave with a deep scowl. The grinding of his jaw echoed in the room and Genji could even swear he heard Hanzo’s fists tightening. Genji didn’t really care that his brother was annoyed or lacking sleep--it was Hanzo’s decision to come after him instead of sleeping. If only they’d leave him alone, maybe neither of them would have to suffer so much. 

The door shut quietly behind Hanzo, allowing silence to settle between Sojiro and his youngest son. 

Sojiro put both his arms into the sleeves of his happi.「Out late again, young dragon?」

Genji put his arms behind his heads and grinned despite the glare his father was giving him.

「You know it, old man.」

「What caught your fancy this time?」

「Hah. There was this great DJ playing over the net at the club owned by Yashiro. He looks like he’s twelve, but he’s good! He’s going to be big one day. 」

Genji rambled on and on about the club and DJ with reckless abandon. It wasn’t as though his father was curious about Genji’s night--he just wanted Genji to feel bad and say that he was ‘sorry for being irresponsible and he’ll be more prudent in the future’ or some bullshit. 

He held up a hand.「Genji. A dragon does not indulge in such frivolous activities or mingle so easily with...those people. When will you learn to be responsible?」

‘Those people’ was Sojiro-talk for ‘plebians’. He was still adamant that their blood was superior because they supposedly descended from ‘dragons’. It’s a well-practiced and well-learned speech that Genji has heard enough that he could probably recite it by heart and would probably find it carved into his gravestone if he happened to die before their father. (Not that he’ll let that happen.)

Rolling his eyes, he decided he no longer wanted to listen and put up a middle finger. "Kiss my ass, old man.”

One of his English speaking friends taught him that. A useful phrase if only for the imagery. Genji could feel a little proud of himself for rendering his father speechless. Sojiro’s eyes widened and breath deepened, a sure sign that he did not expect whatever Genji said. 

The swell of victory is accompanied by the song of birds outside the wooden window sill. 

A sparrow. Common in these parts. 

But Genji could see the light in his father's eyes. He curled a hand beneath his jaw, settling a little deeper into his seat and Genji almost wanted to roll his eyes. His father only ever did that when he thinks he's thought of something clever. (It's almost never clever and usually spelled out humiliation for many people.)

"...Sparrow."

Father never used English if he didn’t have to. Or any other language. Of course, he was perfectly fluent in English (and Mandarin, and Cantonese, and Korean, and Taiwanese, and a little bit of Tagalog, and at least four very different dialects of Japanese--all standard in this household), but he preferred to keep his cards close, skillfully showing one at a time when the situation calls for it. (Watching the blood drain out of the face of a rival gang's leader after Sojiro laughed at a snide comment delivered in Tohoku-dialect was extremely satisfying.)

‘Everything a Shimada does must be done with purpose’ is what his father taught him when he was young. His father calling him ‘Sparrow’ in English is no coincidence. 

「What, Father?」 Genji didn’t hesitate to throw the slight back. 「Forgetting how to use Japanese at your age? Unsightly.」

「Hmph.」 There was an amused twinkle to his father’s crinkled eyes. 「The words of foreigners are good enough for you, Sparrow. If you feel that you cannot be a dragon, then you are no better than a common bird.」In Genji’s ears, he only heard the sounds of a line being drawn. 

A sparrow is nimble. 

A sparrow is free. 

A sparrow can be crushed in one hand. 

Fine, if his father wanted to ridicule him with a word like ‘Sparrow’, then he shouldn't mind if Genji took one of his teacher's lessons to heart. 

The best way to disarm a weapon like that is to take it as his own and wear it as his armor. 

Sojiro called him ‘Sparrow’ at any chance he got. Genji wore the name with pride. 

‘I am my father’s cute, little sparrow.’ 

Not a fearsome, powerful dragon of legend, but a weak, common creature of insignificance. 

The imagery is powerful. 

Ever since the name became known, the notch between Hanzo's brows only grew deeper, the scowl almost permanent. It’s almost hilarious to see, and since Hanzo didn’t bother asking for an explanation, Genji never bothered clearing up the likely misunderstanding that was developing in Hanzo’s overactive mind. 

The name spread to the other employees within the Shimada’s employ. Without knowing the meaning behind it or the origin, they all parroted it, taking small pleasure in the seemingly cute nickname. Genji encouraged it, referring to himself as ‘Sparrow’ in place of his own name. 

It’s another thorn in his stern father’s side. 

Genji didn’t expect his father to put up with having his own jest thrown back in his face. He was always every bit proud of being ‘descendants of dragons’ as his brother was. 

So it came as no surprise when the daily morning routine shifted. 

「I was just in Kyoto. Did you know what I found in the stands there?」

There was only one real reason why his father would mention Kyoto if it’s not work-related.Genji shrugged, feigning ignorance. 

「Was it some cute maikos? You know, if you give them my name at the Gion Hatanaka ryokan--」

Sojiro ignored his son’s nonsense and produced a small take-out container with--he guessed it--a gnarly display of two perfectly grilled sparrows. Kyoto was the last prefecture to still sell skewered sparrows on sticks, after all. 

But the message is clear: Keep it up and you too will end up like that.

How unsubtle. 

Genji just took one and bit into it, the crunch reverberating in the room and he stared his father down. He’d love to see his father try. 

Luckily he didn't have to. 

Their father, Shimada Sojiro, died in his sleep not too long after--a more graceful death than anyone who acts like him deserves. 

(Flipping off his father's gravestone as he escaped the castle is almost a habit.)

As everyone expected, his brother was designated the new leader of the Shimada clan. 

Genji took to his namesake more than ever--disappearing and making a home out in town more often than he stopped by the castle. There was nothing tying him down. He could be free and live his life however he wanted and actually be a part of the present, a part of the world, not tied down by decrepit ‘traditions’ or the stories his father so desperately clung to even in his final moments. 

His brother did not take kindly to Genji’s absence, claiming the household is in shambles because of Genji’s flightiness. Apparently there were still some idiots left who clung onto the hope that Genji might still possibly lead the clan. A stupid thought that offends Genji as much as Hanzo. 

Each time Hanzo would grab Genji and bring him home, Genji would say, 「Don’t you know it’s illegal to keep wild animals like sparrows as pets? 」before slipping out again. Escaping was almost second nature to Genji by this point. Everything he’s learned in his training for assassination was being honed just so that Genji could finally leave. 

The final time before Hanzo’s attempt on Genji’s life, they sat down (well, Genji wasn’t there by choice) to talk. Hanzo was clearly fed up with the disrespect and overloaded with the responsibility and mocking whispers of his incompetence (“What sort of leader can be trusted to control a clan when he cannot even control one person?” “Maybe Hanzo is the wrong choice, maybe the position should go to someone else.” “Why does the leader let his brother debauch the Shimada name? Is he looking for the family to fall?”)

「When will you stop being a child? You have all that you could want here--power, respect, wealth--why leave? If you took your position seriously, we could rule all of Japan, we could have an empire.」

Hanzo was tired, Genji could see it in the way his tensed shoulders slumped, could hear it in his voice. He didn’t look like the proud dragon he’s always boasted himself to be. He looked like the shadow of their father. But only that--just a shadow. 

A dragon stays within its castle walls. Mighty as it is, it will only ever know its palace and the bottom of the sea. A sparrow, though small and insignificant, can make a home anywhere and fly anywhere, free of obligation. Though the name was supposed to make fun of Genji, he thinks it’s probably the best thing his father has ever said about him. 

「I don’t want any of that. I want to be a sparrow.」Hanzo snarled, a hateful look crossing his face.「And a sparrow does not belong in a crumbling castle.」

「This Shimada castle, crumbling? Foolish.」

「Which of us is really the foolish one, brother?」

It was one of the last things he said to his brother before the night Hanzo decided to end everything. In a way, Genji almost became a dragon again--consumed by hate and revenge, he was trapped in a crumbling castle known as his mind. 

But now, things are different. He is different.

Genji takes a thoughtful sip of his cider and waves the bottle at the scenery before them. 

“My father, Sojiro, called me that as an insult.” He meets McCree’s sudden incredulous look with a cheeky grin. “I’ve grown to like it.”

[spacehologramcollection]

Hello! Im a big fan of your MK posts. So, I have an idea (albiet cliché, lmao.) Anyway, I had to help my snake shed the other day. It gave me an idea, could you include some of the pets the MKCrew may have? Of course they wouldn't be cannon, but some creatures you could see them having. If you do decide to do it, please include Johnny Cage and Erron. Thank you!

Hi! I’m glad you enjoy my posts! :) And of course! I wrote this on the bus whilst a storm was happening! Rain, Raiden and Fujin must have been arguing! I loved this idea, it was so cute!!! Thank you for the request!I put a cut in because it was a bit long and didn’t want to clog the tags!Warnings; Mentions of Kano but it is a shitpost, when isn’t it? When I die, I want that on my grave ‘Shitposted about Kano a lot’

·        Sub-Zero (Kuai Liang); 110% a penguin. He fucking yeets an ice one at people in Injustice. He thinks their adorable. Plus, they mate for life, loyalty and sweet as fuck. They can live in cold temperatures (well most of them) So that’s perfect for him! And did he mention they are cute as fuck? I have some art of Sub feeding some penguins. Best thing I’ve ever bought.

·        Bi-Han; As Bi-Han he'd want a polar bear. Their soft and fluffy. But also, terrifying. Like, can you picture one of them, with Bi-Han on the back. Magical. Very scenic, enough to be on a card you send your aunt at Christmas. That and it’s better than Kuai’s fucking penguin. Fuck the penguins.

·        Noob; Is Saibot a pet? Potentially. He does lift him up and they do look ready to drop the hottest mix tape of 2019. But on a serious note. A bat. Cliché as fuck. But they like the dark, they hang upside down. Feared but oddly loveable. And they fit his new edgy "It’s not a phase Kuai!!!” aesthetic.

·        Smoke; A snake. Why? Low-key chilled. I imagine something like a ball python. Something that’s going to be chilled. That, and their perceived as scary as fuck, but are actually adorable. Just like he is! Will boop the snoot. It’s called Noodle and you cannot tell me otherwise. Sir Noodle of Noodleton. Would be his full title, has made him a little crown.  Will often bitch about people to it. Mainly about Bi-Han.

·        Kabal; A dog. He 110% has a dog. I agree with the general consensus he adopted a dog. He probably has a staffie. A fat, happy, rescue Staffie. It’s chilled, laidback but can be energetic. Just like him. This’ll only apply to Post-Burn Kabal. Pre-burn wants a dog. But knows he has no time... unless he’s got a cute neighbour who doesn’t mind dog sitting when he’s away. Now I want to write fluff about this HC.

·        Erron Black; either a horse or a deer.  A horse is an obvious shout. But like I don’t know why I’m saying deer. I can just imagine him explaining it to Kabal like “their majestic as fuck” and that’s probably the reason why I say deer. I imagine he’s the type of person to take people camping. Just to look at the fucking deer. He’d be like that vine, were someone sneezes and scars the deer off. “Oh, nice one Kano"

·        Cassie Cage; Going out on a limb here to say, she has a dog. And not a small dog either. I imagine she’s got a German Shepherd, but she gave it a really soft name. Just to psych people out. Like “Oh you wanna meet Snuzzles?” and it’s just this hulking ex-military dog she rescued. Scary on the outside. Soft on the inside.

·        Johnny Cat; Yeah, he’s got a Sphynx Cat. Where did it come from? It was A cat that was used on set for one of his movies. It was meant to be one of the baddies cats, but he could not stop fawning over it. And that’s how Beerus Snagglepuss came to be. He loves that fucking cat. It’s his mascot now. Matching sunglasses as well. Tweets about it loads.

·        Kano; Is an animal himself so doesn’t really have a pet.  I would not trust him with anything. Because I’m pretty sure in one of his taunts, he stabs and eats a lizard. Him and Baraka are similar on that field, but you know, Baraka is more of a gentleman and probably smells better.

·        Takeda; He wanted a rabbit. But Hanzo wasn’t having it. So, Jacqui being the absolute good-hearted princess she is, got him one to keep on the farm. Hoppy the bunny is its name. And it is so fucking soft. He loves it. Best gift ever. Just don’t tell Hanzo… Jax cannot believe he’s been saddled with a fucking rabbit. But he loves it too.

·        Havik; No pets but moths flock to him. Why? Because they are chaotic as fuck too. He is their lamp. Before opening Hotaru’s wardrobe and letting them in, so they can chew holes in his clothes. Chaossss.

·        Scorpion (Hanzo Hasashi); Does not own pets. But he has a soft spot for dogs and cats. He doesn’t have time for himself, let alone a pet. But like, when he spies a cat or dog. He kinda sneak pets it. He’ll make sure nobody is looking and BAM pets. Even if anyone saw him petting the cat, are they going to tell someone? No. Because nobody would fucking believe them.

·        Geras; Kronika is the type of person to say ‘I’m allergic to animal hair’ when she’s not. Just so nobody can have their pets around her. Sorry, not fucking sorry. So poor Geras has been lacking in the pet department. His eternal loneliness would be made a lot easier if she allowed him to have a pet. I honestly think he’d like cats, more specifically a quirky looking rescue cat. He’s alone and thinks he needs an equally as quirky companion.

·        Skarlet; I think she’d have a snake. Not a small one either. Like a massive python or a constrictor. She’d be the type to lounge around with her snake. She gives me major villainess vibes, but on a Dark Queen level. And I fucking love it. So yeah, I think a snake fits her aesthetically and personality wise. Scary on the outside but loveable. That is a running theme for most of the Kombat Krew, to be honest.

·        Raiden; He. Is. A. Cat. Person. He loves them. Oh my god look at their lil ears twitching. Legend says Sky Temple is a safe haven for strays. He just loves them. They are calming, cute and little sweethearts. He will never be caught fawning over them in front of others. But, showing him a cute cat is one sure way to get out of trouble. It’s why Kung Lao will bring the cutest one with him, when Raiden has requested a meeting. He can’t shout at him if he’s holding a purring bundle of joy.

·        Fujin; Whilst Fujin likes cats. I imagine he has a pet bird. Something like a Falcon, it’s not really a pet, but more of a wild friend. He respects nature too much. This bird will come constantly to see him, bring him messages and it’s a friendship that was built up over time. He likes birds because they need the wind to fly. They are also free to go anywhere they want and see everything and anything they want. Something he sort of envies. Plus, he loves the sound of them. The Dawn Chorus is the perfect meditation music.

·        Rain; Totally has a tiger or some exotic big cat. He is literally a Disney Princess to me at this point. Something that is intimidating to others but soft and sweet to him. I always imagine rich people have exotic pets and well this is it. I do not promote keeping them as pets. But if we are talking what they would canonically keep, it would be something like a big cat. Or maybe a peacock. Something flamboyant.

·        Jade; Even before the Kotal ship set sail. I always imagined Jade having an affinity with big cats. But unlike Rain, I kind of pictured Jade having more of an alliance and understanding with them. Rather than having one as a pet. Maybe one she rescued as a cub, raised up, set free and it comes and aids her from time to time. She is so perfect and has a heart of gold. It would be hard not to see this. I am getting all soft and fluffy imagining this now.

[scribble-fics]

Pets.

(Cute idea I though of, what would be the each turtles all time top pet they would want to have. Kinda based this off 2k3 but it can go with any tmnt verse I guess)

Raph-

🍕 with raph he wants something he can be rowdy with. Like a big dog. I could see raph having like 5 pits if he wanted.

🍕 yeah dogs are a generic pet but he wants a pet that's loyal and interactive. He likes all animals but having a dog would be fun.

🍕 would name it something tough. Like spike, fang, hulk, he wants a boy dog. But he wouldn't mind having a girl dog either. She would probably be called something like bella or diamond.

🍕 raph loves sleeping and cuddling with his dog. Puppy cuddles are the best no matter how big his dog is.

Leo-

🍕 Leo would like something calm but also interactive. Something that on bad days he can just admire his pet, and on good days he can let it crawl around in his hands.

🍕 I think that's why Leo wants a mouse. Yes it's funny because splinter is a rat, but mice are really clean creatures. Very smart too and delicate.

🍕 Leo would treat his pet with up most respect. He'd get a big cage allowing the creature to have enough space and fill it with all kinds of things.

🍕 Leo would name his mouse after a samurai, like tsuna, hanzo, or masamune. If Leo had a girl rat he would name her something like tsuki, hana, or Ari.

Donnie-

🍕 Donnie I think would want a parrot. Something that lives for a long time, and has smarts.

🍕 has a good sized cage for his parrot, but prefers his bird to have open flying access. His lab has a few perches sitting here and there too.

🍕 Donnie likes to talk to his bird and let it mimic him. Also asks his bird for help like holding a screwdriver in its beak while he checks something.

🍕 would name his bird something like gadget , Simon, maybe if he's so bold would name it bill after bill Nye. If the bird is a female he is leaning to the names gizmo, pepper, or sage.

Mikey-

🍕 Mikey would want anything as a pet. He sees a ladybug and he tries to take it home and feed it.

🍕 but most of all he wants a iguana. He thinks they are so cool and chill. And hey they are like in the same family.

🍕 has the chillest vibes with his iguana. Will just have it with him whenever and it's the best.

🍕 would most likely name his iguana something dope, like iguana joe, dougie, or Tony. If it's a girl he'd name her Wanda iguana, or iggy, maybe Isabel.

(I know the gif isn't a iguana blame Tumblr it doesn't have any good ones so have this)

[museijikokeno-blog]

Beep.

Send “Beep” for a random text from my muse ;; accepting!

15 — A text for help

[TEXT TO: Mememan Daylen][FROM: Hanzo]

   txt: Would you be alarmed if I said I was stuck in Sector 3   txt: Specifically, stuck up a large tree located in Sector 3   txt: To add more specifics, a large tree surrounded by vicious dogs in Sector 3, without any equipment on my person to fend them off.   txt: I would not be alarmed, most likely because that is my current situation.

   A few minutes go by without anymore texts. Some worry might have come up because of that, had it not been for the message that soon came.

   txt: Please help.

[holdingup-fallingsky]

Overwatch Headcannons (because I got bored in English)

When McCree makes a bad pun, he will tip his hat at the person

When D.va ejects from her mech she will do some crazy gymnast move, everyone is pretty amazed except Amélie, she will pick out the tiniest thing to critique (Hana didn’t point her toes on the back handspring disgusting)

Widowmaker still partices her ballet routines for exercise and Sombra has been joining her recently (Gabe has been too but I wasn’t supposed to tell you that whOOPS) and now the 3 of them are hella graceful and light on their feet (D.va wants Sombra to wear a bell because she always sneaks up on her) and flexible?! Like hella so?!

Jack always misses his farm and when he was Strike Commander he would have to go on “emergency Overwatch meetings, sorry Gabe, very important” and would actually just head back to Bloomington for the weekend to visit his farm (Gabe picked up on It right away and got him a pet duckling that’s so dAMN CUTE THANKS GABI) *No Jack didn’t tear up, It was a duck for God’s sake, he’s the strike commander after all. GET OFF MY DICK*

After Mercy heals someone she will sometimes hand them a lollipop out of instinct (old habits die hard, I guess) at first everyone is v confused but they just accept It now (Jesse gets really excited when he’s hurt and sees Angela coming because ‘yay lollipop!’ and gets really disappointed when she doesn’t give him one. Angela picks up on this and makes sure to always give him one)

Hanzo will eat sushi for breakfast on occasion and this grosses Jesse out because why? it’s 7 in the morning and you’re eating fish? what about waffles? Hanzo will forever laugh at Jesse’s horrifyed face (he still isn’t used to it)

Jesse has a tendency to pout and give puppy dog eyes when he is either a) disappointed b) wants something really bad and can’t have it or c) sad for some reason and no one can say no to him (how can you?! You have to have no soul to not feel remorse for this poor innocent baby!) except Hanzo has an immunity to It by now (Jesse still gets his way, Hanzo isn’t as good as he wants to believe)

Reinhardt is a hella good cook, everyone always asks him to bring dinner to their meetings or other gatherings because just try his home baked pretzels! Like damn!

Ana unknowingly mother hens all her team members, always asking if they have jackets if it’s cold outside or make sure they wear sunscreen. She will actually pack lunches for her team and write notes on their bags (protect this woman) Get rest everyone! We have a big mission tomorrow! (Hana don’t make me use my sleep dart)

Lena has a bad habit of finishing people’s sentences for them because she knows the outcome being a time traveler, and it’s low key annoying (Lena, I need to check your- Chronal excelerator, I know Winston you already said that. No I didn’t Lena, you time jumped again.)

Gabe won’t admit It but his favorite types of dogs are the small lap dogs that you could accidentally step on, and one day Jack walked into his home to be assaulted by living fluffballs from the shins down (Mullido! Princesa! Ven aquí! Bajate!)

[robo-cryptid]

Sooo @bluandorange posted this AU idea and I was gonna be up all night anyway doing work and other stuff so I might have drabbled some weird amnesia/Talon-sleeper McHanzo things. I recommend clicking and reading the prompt, because it’s juicy, but the gist is: Hanzo and Jesse in suburban middle America, reprogrammed by Talon to have no clue who they were before. But they do make some super-cute newlyweds! [Edit: There is now a Part 2. Content warning: brainwashing, memory loss, etc. -- I am more than happy to tag anything I have not thought of, so please don’t hesitate to ask.]

Edit again! This drabble became part of the fic Our Heads Are Just Houses, now up on AO3. Rated Mature.

James pulled into the driveway at exactly 6:45. It meant he’d beaten the traffic out of the office, swung by the store to pick up more dog food, and still made it home before dinner. Joel would be happy, and so would Delilah.

As expected, she greeted him at the door, bouncing around his legs as he made his way inside. He dipped to a knee, careful not to drop the bag on her, and he pet a hand over her yellow head. She was still a puppy, picked up when their neighbor’s pedigreed retriever gave birth after an outing with an outdoor mutt. She was frankly terribly behaved, and spoiled rotten. James caught Joel staring, stuck somewhere between adoration and frustration at the way James let her climb all over him.

“She’ll never learn to greet anybody proper if you let her get away with that,” Joel told him, arms crossed.

James grinned and got to his feet. “She has time to learn. Let her live a little.” He crossed to his husband, grabbed him by the apron to pull him in for a kiss, then shoved the bag of dog food at him.

“Mm, dog spit,” Joel said with a laugh.

“I will wash my face.” He ran his fingers through Joel’s beard. “You’re due for a trim.”

“I’ll think about it after supper,” he said, patting James on the butt to shoo him.

James sighed and went upstairs, and he pulled himself free of his tie and jacket. He hung them both with care, toed his shoes off and set them in his closet on the new shelf they’d installed. It still felt odd to wear his shoes through the house, but with Delilah had come some necessary changes if either of them wanted to keep any pair in good condition. In the attached master bathroom, he made good on his promise to wash Delilah’s saliva from his face, and he patted dry with a monogrammed hand towel. It had been a gift from a wedding guest; they bickered over who, exactly, but the person had remembered their choice to stick with the “J” theme. Their names together would have been “M-E,” which they both felt was inappropriate to commemorate a marriage.

He checked his own face in the mirror, wondering if he’d need to tidy it up. It got him distracted by the early grays in his hair, and he sighed. Joel called it distinguished, but he thought, not for the first time, about dyeing or trimming it, something to stop the reminder that he would indeed grow old. Back in the bedroom, he saw the wedding photo Joel kept framed on his side of the bed, and James thought he could handle growing old if it meant he’d do it with the man downstairs.

He made his way back to the kitchen, where Joel was humming to himself as he prepared their plates. “Can I help you with anything?” he asked, and Joel laughed, shook some of his hair out of his eyes.

“Can put that pan in the dishwasher if you wanna get started on cleanup. Maybe grab some forks for the table?”

James nodded and did as he was asked, moved to the dining room with the forks in tow. Joel set their plates down and tugged the apron off, disappeared back into the kitchen for a moment and returned with a bowl of salad. They ate together in the sort of peaceful quiet James loved, and as always, Joel’s cooking was perfect.

“It’s excellent,” James said with a smile. “No surprise.”

Joel beamed at him around a mouthful of salmon, which should have been disgusting but only charmed him. “Was lookin’ up a restaurant for for a piece I’m workin’ on and saw this on the menu. Thought it might meet your criteria,” he said with a teasing nudge of his foot. James had been on him lately about their health, surely part of his neurosis about growing older. “I’m breakin’ the rules this weekend, though. Karen came by today, invited us to a barbecue.”

“Hm,” James said. “She always seems to come around when I’m not home. Should I be worried?” It was meant as a joke, a nod to the curious number of middle-aged women in the neighborhood who could not get enough of Joel’s easy charm. Several, they suspected, were very excited to prove how enlightened they were by befriending them.

Joel laughed. “So worried,” he said with a wink. “Y’know, she asked me somethin’ today...” He trailed off for a moment, a flash of confusion, then he laughed at himself. “That was gonna be a funny story, but I can’t quite remember it. ‘M sure I’ll think of it later.”

James only smiled. It happened sometimes; Joel was a veteran from the omnic threat here in the States, had suffered a few injuries that left him occasionally spacey. “I’m sure,” he answered.

They talked about their days, though they had been boring enough that stories were difficult to summon. James was an accountant, a job whose details thrilled absolutely nobody, not even his husband. Joel worked from home writing a food and travel blog — though they hadn’t traveled much since they’d gotten married — and he picked up freelance work where he could.

A knock at the door interrupted Joel’s funny rant about an editor he was dealing with, and James excused himself to answer. “Tell the barbarians to come back when we ain’t in the middle of supper.” James smiled back at him, then swung open the door, Delilah at his heels.

Before him stood two figures in hoodies: a dark-skinned woman and a man with a face riddled in scars. Or, no, that seemed a trick of the lighting, the porch light thrown over the shadow of his hoodie. His face was smooth, cheeks only a little pockmarked. He stared, perhaps rudely, and they stared back at him. They were woefully out of place in the neighborhood, looked as if they were up to no good. He could feel the beginning of one of his migraines slowly forming behind his eyes. “May I... help you?” he finally asked, but he could feel the dull throb increasing, pushing across his forehead and back. This threatened to be a nasty one; perhaps it had been the salmon.

“Hanzo,” the man breathed out, a strange hiss escaping with it. The pain spiked, felt as though someone were digging needles between his eyebrows.

He shoved a palm into his eye, tried futilely to scrub the feeling away. “I’m sorry,” he grit out. “Now is... not a good time.” His vision felt blurred; it was hard to even look at them. “I must ask you to leave,” he said, still haltingly. He tried to close the door, and the woman’s hand shot out, caught it.

“The hell are you doin’? He told y’all to leave. I got no problem callin’ the cops,” Joel said, and the rest was a blur, James only dimly aware of Joel shutting and locking the door. He led James to the couch and dimmed the lights, and James heard him place a call to the police. “Prob’ly nothin’, but just in case,” he said, voice all apology and charm, pitched low to honor the migraine.

When it was finished, Joel carefully guided him up the stairs to the dark bedroom, got his ice pack and pills. “Lemme take care of the dishes, and I’ll be back up.” James nodded, then lay in the dark silence until Joel returned, trying his hardest to be quiet. James could hear every step anyway, could hear the creak of the bed with every movement, but Joel was forgiven when he offered the scalp and neck massage.

It was gone by morning, the leftover bruised feeling easy to forget when Joel’s gentle hand rubbing his neck sent a flash of heat through his body, ended with both of them getting out of bed later than usual. Over breakfast, they laughed, both embarrassed by the night before.

“I still can’t believe you called the cops on those children,” James laughed.

“Eh, punk kids should know better than to prank the neighbors. Whose were they, again? Looked like Don and Paulo’s, maybe.”

“Maybe,” James shrugged. He put away the dishes, packed a lunch, and he went to the office as he always did.

[alexiela73]

Snow stuff! Genji hanzo and mccree playing in the snow with their s/o? Hcs please! (Btw happy birthday baby! -3-)

Thank you, love

Genji:

At first he’s really hesitant when the first snowflakes fall

He pretends to not like winter, to hate snow…

But you know better. Hanzo has told you all his stories as Genji grew up- including the winter ones

And from the stories, it was winter that Genji loved the best, even just because of the snow

It took him a week to admit that it reminded Genji of the past

It was difficult sometimes for him to look at something that reminded him of the past

But slowly you managed to get him to come outside, saying it was time to make new memories in the snow instead

Wrapping his scarf around his neck, he followed you

The pond near the house you two lived in was completely frozen over, and instantly you looked excited

Getting out the ice skates you both had, you asked Genji to teach you how

It was something he’d been meaning to teach you for awhile now

At your request, he put on his skates and over the next four hours, began teaching you how to ice skate. It was beautiful, and despite the cold you loved every second with him

It was interesting how skilled he was, doing figure eights and even gliding backwards

The man was showing off, you eventually realized, but smiled because it was the first time he’d been boastful about anything

When the two of you were at last too tired to ice skate, you two laid in the snow together, hand in hand, and made snow angels

Between the two of you, Soba seemed to stare from the covered porch, eyes glittering in the light with curiosity and uncertainty

Finally, after having just sat there for hours, put one claw delicately and you saw a shiver ripple through her

Then she slowly slunk over, confused by all the little claw-prints she left in the snow, dashing over until she could jump and land on your stomach

Grunting, you smiled as you pet her, Soba’s tail swishing like that of a cat as she crouched and continued poking at the snow

Though it was now night, with the snow and the purple sky above, you felt like the world was different and magical

And seeing the look in your eyes, how your eyes sparkled with wonder as the two of you lay there beneath the gently falling snow, he could believe it

Hanzo:

Surprisingly, the man loves winter and the snow

There were few things that his old memories didn’t taint, but it seemed the winter wasn’t one of them

At the first sign of snow, Hanzo went and took your hands quite seriously

“The moment there is a layer of snow…” he said, then hesitated. “We must go build a snowman. It is tradition,” he said gravely. 

Giggling, you found how serious he was to be cute and nodded

Of course the two of you were going to go build a snowman! 

The moment there was a solid layer and it had hardened just enough with the cold, the two of you bundled up in your winter gear and headed outside

You saw Hanzo stand there for a moment, his eyes closed and his face tilted up toward the sky

In a way, he looked so peaceful…so happy

Taking his hand, you brought it to your lips and pressed a soft kiss to it

“Lets make snow angels,” you said, eyes shining brightly. The look in his eyes told you that he wanted nothing more then to kiss you

Without hesitation, Hanzo laid to make snow with you, making snow angels in the soft white powder

Anyone who knew Hanzo would be surprised to see how much he seemed to enjoy this right now

When the two of you got up, you grinned at the snow angels. They were so perfect!

Immediately the two of you got to work on snowmen

You worked on the head while Hanzo worked tireless on the body, starting by forming a large snow ball that took both hands to hold before rolling it in the snow

It took perhaps fifteen minutes, twenty even to get the three balls for the snowman, and you gently dusted and helped curve its edges so it was rounder while he grabbed the clothing

Together, we wrapped a blue scarf around its neck and he let me do the honor of pushing in its carrot nose after he’d given it pebble eyes

Stepping back, we assessed our work, leaning into each others warmth and grinning like fools

A noise made you both turn to see two blue dragons leaping in the snow. Both were the size of cats, and one slowly wiggled its bum before leaping- and disappearing into the snow, sinking with only a little squeak of surprise

You couldn’t help laughing, and even Hanzo had a smile at the sight of the dragons making a fool of themselves in the snow

McCree:

Honestly, hadn’t always really been a big fan of snow

It got in the way of missions, and usually was just a pain in the ass

So when it started to snow, it was only an annoyance for him

Until he saw you there at the window, staring out in awe and joy at the falling flakes, and immediately his throat went dry

You had that effect on him, where sometimes the raw expression in your face, always so honest, just made his heart thump erratically in his chest

After a moment you turned and spotted him in the doorway

Immediately you started toward him, and the moment he saw those pleading eyes he started to back up, but not before you managed to take his hand

“Please?” you asked, your voice soft as you stared into his eyes pleadingly

Grimacing, Jesse knew there was no point in trying to fight it. “Fine,” he said with a long sigh, “But bring Bambi. She could use some exercise.”

Beaming, you went to find the child you and Jesse had- a russet colored coonhound, who was almost a year old now. This would be her first snow

“Bambi!” you called, and after a moment the scrape of paws on wood floors echoed as the dog appeared from your bedroom door, tail wagging

Getting dressed, the two of you went outside into the back yard as you waited for Jesse, who was still grumbling behind you

Watching Bambi, Jesse saw her stare at the snow ahead, before a look of challenge rose in her eyes…after a moment she bunched up her legs and, like a deer, propelled herself right into the snow and started rolling in it

Laughing, you looked up as the snowflakes fell softly around you, before spinning, arms spread wide

It’d been awhile since you’d seen snow, since you had mostly moved continents before meeting Jesse, and when the two of you had last began dating, you’d been in India working on a mission for over a month

“Can we go inside now?” Jesse called, though he had to admit you liked like an angel, twirling in the snow there with your head high

“Not unless you don’t want sex for four months,” you said, your eyes closed and the last time he’d challenged you to something like it, he’d suffered.

There was a moment before he grumbled and walked into the snow, watching the dog with a scowl…but you couldn’t help smiling. How grumpy he looked

Unnoticed when you slowly bent to pick up a bunch of snow, you molded into a ball before taking aim…and firing

Jesse had just turned to you when the ball hit him smack in the face…and you gasped, not having meant for that

“I’m so sorry! I just-I don’t know, I just wanted us to have some fun and-” you blathered, looking down now when you got hit with a snowball right in the chest

Gasping, you looked up at him. He was already holding another, but there was the hint of a smile on his face. The dog had taken interest in what looked like a ball in his hand

“You’ll be sorry,” he said, winking, and you squealed as he started a full out snowball fight. The dog tried chasing every single snowball, failing

The two of you played in the snow till you were both too tired to lift another arm

[mystupidoverwatchimagines]

Cry If I Want To

This is a little thing just for some fun. Our heroes with a Nuetral S/O who seems super tough and untouchable emotionally but instead they are a huge crybaby when it comes really cute things (like "Dogs Reacting to Soldiers Coming Home" or "Kids Getting Pets for Christmas" videos). This is not based off of any persons (*cough cough* Its Me *cough cough*

REQUESTS ARE OPEN, HOWEVER

All requests must be sent to my personal messages and not my inbox (as it can't accept asks). I'm happy to keep you anon.

This is for 76, Hanzo, McCree, Reaper

Soldier 76--

° Was attracted to you because of this tough exterior. He likes that you are so strong and independent, he finds the fact that you can handle yourself in all situations.

° However, when he found you, all snuggled up with blankets in your room, only your face being exposed and your holopad illuminating your features that he saw a totally different side of you.

° When you turned to look at him when he entered your room, he was taken aback to see the tear stains on your cheeks and he was just in shock. He had never... Would never... Expect to see you in such a state. His first thought is--

° "Someone is dead"

° But you calm him down by raising a hand explaining it was your own fault, you saw a really sweet video of a boy consoling a sick bird and you lost it. Nobody hurt you so instead he kept thinking

° "Why would someone do this to themselves?"

° But as he took in your puffy red eyes, the way your lip kind of trembled when you laughed at yourself, and you wiping your eyes with the blanket... My god...

° You looked absolutely adorable.

° So instead of chidding you on your poor choices, this sweet old guy moved over to you and climbed up on the bed. He pulled you into his lap and hugged you tightly and suddenly the water works started all over again.

° "Jack it was just so cute..." You sniffled and he couldn't help but smile as he held you tight.

Hanzo--

° He would never admit it, but he envied a lot about you. You were just so strong. Able to let just about anything roll off your back in any given situations. He never saw he angry or upset, just confident that everything would work out if it was supposed to. He wished he could be like this.

° However, one day he had caught you, your hand over your eyes and just sobbing. There is a moment of absolute panic. He is completely clueless on what the heck to do.

° However when you look up to see Hanzo there, you also panic and quickly rub your eyes. You apologize and explain it was a video of Kittens Finding Homes that had done you in. You were so embarrassed, your cheeks are bright pink. However you see Hanzo look relieved this was the reason and not that something had harmed you in any way.

° You goes and sits on the couch and he can't help but tease you, but it is in a very endearing way that makes you cover your face with your hands again to hide that your face had gone bright red.

° Hanzo actually finds this part of you very beautiful. Like it is your release since you are always so strong in front of others. Will often make you tea afterwards and give you small kisses on your hands and cheeks.

McCree--

° He LOVES this strong independent you. He likes that you are unafraid of anything and that you always put your best foot forward no matter the situation, however he does fear you bottling things up when they should be let out.

° When he finds you crying in your room, he'll immediately rush to you and give you a big tight hug. If anyone made you cry like this he will skin them alive. He won't let them live, not for a second.

° And he tells you that, over and over again. When you pull yourself together, you can't help but laugh at his comments and you shook your head quickly.

° No no you explain it was a video of a dog finding its owner after 4 years that had broke you down in such a way.

° You go on further to say that you are a bit of a crybaby when it comes to cute videos like this and they always make you cry. He can't help but smile gently at you and take his thumb and wipe your cheeks.

° "Sugar, you always are surprising me," he states before holding you to him tightly and you recieve all the warm loving forehead kisses you can stand.

Reaper--

° Lord help him

° Why are you crying

° Who did this

° Who even dared--

° You have to stop him quickly as he had turned around pulling out his large shot guns as he was about ready to tear down every building he could till he found the culprit who made you cry.

° He likes how feisty you are. How nothing can ever hold you back, he likes how fierce you are and how nothing seems to be able to tear you down.

° AND. THE. FACT. SOMEONE. TRIED. TO. HURT. YOU??? UH HUH. NOPE.

° But as you explain that no one had hurt you and that this only happened because you watched a really cute video and it made you cry because it was so damn cute he looked almost offended by this as well. But soon he relaxed and couldn't help but laugh at you. He saw you huff and he immediately pulled you into a tight hug and scattered kisses all over your face.

° He keeps you all wrapped up and makes you watch gory horror movies cause seeing you cry actually hurt his heart and he doesn't want to see it ever again.

[arceusbeta]

Ok but what kind of cat would E V E R Y hero in overwatch have please

this should also answer @moth-valley's question regarding ideal fluff ratios for catsAna: doesn't have time to raise a cat, but enjoys feeding street cats and taking care of any that seem too skinny or sick or whatever. Beyond that p neutral on favsBastion: all cats are friends but they like the very small ones that sometimes the larger ones bring to nap on their heatsink and play w Ganymede (they're not sure what kittens are)D.Va: she has a virtual cat pet in a phone charm. thinks black cats are cute but doesn't have timeDoomfist: has a serval that can sit next to him ominouslyGenji: indiscriminate. will play with any cat (using his shurikens irresponsibly)Hanzo: claims to not care about cats but secretly wants a Sphinx cat. thinks the wrinkles are cute.Junkrat: for a week owned a rat the length of his forearmLucio: has killer cat allergies. pets stray cats anyways. has no regrets.McCree: will temporarily foster any strays he finds until he can get them a good home. the American southwest has a bunch more cats named Clint and Butch Cassidy and things like thatMei: warm and fluffy cats! probably a big fan of ragdolls for poofiness valueMercy: dreams about just being able to have a nice tabbyMoira: canonly a dog person but not like opposed to having a Siamese that she could pet ominouslyOrisa: all cats are so good. all dogs are so good. she will protect them all.Pharah: adopted an older cat with a few scars and enjoys the company during downtimeReaper: black like his soul (also black cats are the softest and also they don't shed as visibly onto his coat. doomfists serval covers him in orange anyways)Reinhardt: that armor is frequently just jam packed full of kittens he's protectingRoadhog: he helped take care of junkrats giant ratSoldier: 76: something low maintenance and friendly. helps Ana with straysSombra: has two strays that adopted her against her will. she loves wintermute and hiro protagonist so muchSymmetra: as established wants a super long Oriental longhair to be slinky and etherealTorbjorn: did you see his Maine coon in the comic. It was perfect. I can't improve on that.Tracer: she and Emily have been trying to decide on a cat to bring home for months but she loves them all too muchWidowmaker: anti-cat after Doomfists serval knocked over her goddamn wine (would still pet a black cat tho)Winston: knows he is way too irresponsible for a cat given that he can barely feed himself some days. settles for watching Maru compilations (btw Maru is still alive)Zarya: dreams of living with like 30 SiberiansZenyatta: attracts cats due to chiming constantly moving orbs. adopts a calico named Iris so that he can on the regular gaze at the iris

[classywastelandbread-blog]

Honored Spirits: Email

This chapter kind of got away from me but I thought it’d be fun to explore Ramen and Angela’s relationship since it has been very Hanzo-heavy. 

Inspired in part by conversation with ohayokuroneko.

Hanzo’s dragons enjoy math and science and engineering but Ramen is a little strange and enjoys...art....we’re just going to go with “art”. 

In which Ramen and Angela are BFFs, McCree is a noodle whisperer, Angela is very much an enabler that has little to no shame, and Ramen is given email access and access to the internet. 

At this point, Angela wasn’t too surprised to find Ramen draped over her body when she woke up. Clearly their luminescence was optional because it was as dull as the contraband iguanas her roommate in medical school had kept, possibly in hopes of not disturbing her.

“Guten morgen,” she mumbled to it, flopping a hand tiredly along the bed until she found a part of its cool body for her to pet; it purred, half-lidding its gold-orange eyes contentedly despite the half hearted nature of her petting. Switching to English since she wasn’t sure that the spirit could understand German, she asked, “Does Genji ever notice that you’re missing?”

Ramen bobbed its head though if it was meant in answer to her question she could never be sure.

“Not that I’m complaining,” she continued. “I don’t mind seeing you so often but it makes me wonder sometimes.” Ramen nipped at her playfully. Unfortunately due to the way it was lying over and on her, it only succeeded in pushing its nose into her breast. “You perv,” she muttered halfheartedly, shoving its head away. “Alright, I’m getting out of bed.”

Ramen bobbed its head again and drifted in the air after her, following her into the bathroom until she shooed it out. It scratched at the door and wiggled the door knob – just once each to prove a point – before presumably wandering away.

When she finished showering and getting ready, Angela found Ramen curled up like an enormous snake on her bed. It had clumsily tried to make it for her before giving up. Seeing her, it drifted over and coiled around her neck and torso like a bandolier as she tugged the sheets straight and flat.

Breakfast was a simple affair: an apple, a fried egg, and some of the chili that McCree had made the night before that she took with her to her office. Drifting after her with its claws paddling through the air as if it were swimming, Ramen dropped a banana in front of Lucio’s door; she winced, knowing that the banana would be badly bruised from a meter-high drop…if it survived intact after Lucio left his room. An offering of an orange was more gingerly placed in front of Hana’s room and a single grape at Ana’s. Hanzo and McCree each got half of a cherry and Angela didn’t want to consider what that may mean.

Why the dratted creature did such things, Angela would never know but she had long since given up trying to dissuade it. It got to the point where she would simply carry the extra offerings to prevent further accidents. Ramen would become upset if she broke or cut the cherry for it so she’d carry a tissue with her to wipe the juice from its mouth and talons.

Their morning wanderings done, Angela locked herself in her office, ate her breakfast, and sat down to do her research.

Her first patient of the day was Lucio, who had tripped over the banana. He was pretty sure that he didn’t require stitches but he just wanted to check with her to be sure. After cleaning the wound and giving him a few butterfly bandages to close the gash, she sent him on his way though she did wonder why he tripped over it knowing that Ramen dropped off a piece of fruit in front of his door almost every morning.

She wasn’t too surprised that her next patient was Genji. “If I didn’t know better I’d say you were doing this on purpose,” she quipped with a hint of ice in her voice.

“Not at all,” Genji assured her meekly, eyeing Ramen where it was curled around her half-eaten bowl of chili. It stuck its tongue out at its host and wiggled the forked ends mockingly. “Ramen doesn’t tell me what you do here,” he added even though Angela had never asked. “I’ve tried.”

His panels were stuck together and there was dirt, grass, and neon fibers in the inner workings of his joints. She didn’t want to know why and so ignored it except to consider how to clean everything out. “Armor off,” she told him briskly.

“You should buy me dinner first,” Genji quipped, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

He caved under Angela’s unimpressed stare and began stripping off his clothes. As he began unlatching the plates of his armor, Angela sat down at her desk and resumed eating her leftover chili, watching him. “It always tastes better the second day,” she told Ramen and it bobbed its head as if agreeing, its ears pricked curiously toward her.

(She knew for a fact from McCree that the honored spirits couldn’t and didn’t eat; neither could they taste so it was somewhat of a foreign concept to them. Ramen seemed to be fascinated when she described flavors to it, so she had developed somewhat of a habit of doing so when she thought about it.)

“I feel abandoned,” Genji said plaintively, crossing his arms carefully over the exposed panels of his chest as if hiding his nudity. “Forgotten. Woe!”

“If you truly felt so abandoned and forgotten, you probably wouldn’t have left ‘meditation’ with Zenyatta,” Angela said absently, scraping the bowl for the last of the chili. Ramen bared its teeth in an attempt at a human smile, flared its whiskers, and bobbed its head. Genji made a strangled noise as Angela put her bowl down and brushed imaginary crumbs from her lap. “I’m surprised you can still blush,” she said absently. “Now hop on the table, ja? I have a lot of work to do.”

“Use cuffs next time,” Angela suggested an hour later as Genji fled from her office. She rubbed her fingers on the scales above Ramen’s subtympanic shield the way the dragon liked and it leaned into her caresses. “Tell your host that nylon rope doesn’t work so well in his joints,” she added. “Zenyatta should know better. Also, recommend that they not use red because it clashes with his running lights.”

Ramen bobbed its head, baring its fangs as it tried yet again to smile. It wiggled its head in a way that she interpreted as amusement – like it was laughing. McCree once told her that the laugh of the honored spirits sounded like a box of metal nails or bolts rattling around in a wooden box so in a way she was glad that she couldn’t hear their voices.

They settled into their routine again: Angela doing her research and peer review and Ramen fiddling with an old terminal in the back corner. It had been toying with it for the past few days it visited her and if anyone needed any confirmation of their intelligence, then there it was: even though Ramen’s talons weren’t quite meant to move like a human hand, it could use tools – like an abandoned stylus – to compensate.

Finding a break in her review, she leaned back in her chair and watched the honored spirit toy with the terminal. It was glowing again, casting a gentle green light that was reflected in the surfaces around it. It reminded her very much of Genji’s own lights. With the stylus held delicately in its jaws, Ramen very carefully typed into the old analog keyboard. As she watched, it put the stylus down and touched the ancient wireless mouse with a talon. It very carefully moved it around and there was a soft click as it pressed one of the buttons; on the terminal a new window opened.

“Maybe that’s not the best terminal for you to use,” Angela mused and Ramen twisted its head like an owl to look at her. “I’m still waiting to be creeped out by seeing you do that but I can’t help but think you’re still just too cute,” she added.

McCree had said that any “facial expression” the dragons showed would be in the soft skin around their eyes and in their whiskers, jaws, and ears. Now the skin around Ramen’s eyes crinkled and it tossed its head as if to say, I am not cute – a sentiment that McCree told her was repeated often by the spirits.

“Let’s find you a touch-screen terminal,” Angela decided. “And we can see if we can adjust the keypad for you to be able to type easier.” Ramen lifted into the air as if gravity no longer applied to it and “swam” over to her, paddling its legs until it could slip comfortably around her neck. “Are you going to embarrass Genji with what you’re researching?”

The dragon twisted its head to look at her, its eyes widening almost comically and its ears pricking forward; its tongue lolled out of its mouth, fat and pink and forked and glistening with the illusion of moisture as it cocked its head to the side like a dog as if to ask who, me?

“Yeah, I thought so,” Angela said, hooking a finger into its open jaws. It tossed its head back. She could feel it laugh even if she couldn’t hear it, something she was always fascinated by. “Athena?”

“I will begin setting up a new account,” the AI said from the nearest terminal. “For now I will label it ‘MED_Research_Asst_1’.”

Ramen laughed again, bobbing its head in exaggerated motions.

After a few days of trial and error, Angela developed a stylus that was much easier for Ramen to manipulate. Its hands weren’t well suited for grasping small things after all, so it had to be something that was easily moved by its jaws. In the end simplicity won out and they fashioned a mouthpiece for Ramen to gently grip in its mouth while it typed, clicked, and otherwise manipulated the touchpad screen.

Once they reached that point, Angela and Athena worked with Ramen to figure out its visual acuity. It seemed both fascinated and bored by the subject so they kept their explanations to simple words and short sentences.

Ramen assured them that it could very easily adjust itself to all of the screens it had encountered. It told her that it was much like adjusting the focus on her “weird human eyes”.

When Angela absently commented that Ramen very much reminded her of Genji, the spirit simply replied, as above, so below.

(When none of the dragons appeared to be around, Angela asked McCree about this - the gunslinger had quickly become the dragon expert outside of the Shimada brothers and was less likely to give her a vague and unhelpful answer because it amused him. McCree explained that the spirits took on the traits of their hosts – to be expected since Ramen and Udon had been with the brothers for every waking moment since they were born. He added that Soba once told him that at heart, Hanzo had always been a crotchety old man and that Genji had always been the odd sort.)

The other positive of setting up a terminal for Ramen was its new email capabilities. It didn’t email anyone save her and Athena, seeing no reason to, but it proved to be surprisingly talkative. If Genji was suspicious of their relationship (any more than he was initially) he gave no sign of it and Ramen didn’t indicate that it was doing anything that Genji wasn’t already aware of.

On the other hand, McCree knew of their interactions and how she and Athena had helped Ramen gain access to the internet. What McCree knew, Hanzo and his dragons knew though Ramen didn’t mention any discussion with Udon or Soba about what it researched.

Things came to a head when Angela found an email that had been sent to her late at night, roughly one week since she had given Ramen access to a computer terminal:

From: MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org To: Angela_Ziegler@Overwatch.org Subject: Research

He knows.

Medical Research Assistant 1 Overwatch Medical Bay 5 Gibraltar Watchpoint

She found a chain of emails timestamped a few hours previous. Reading through the chain, she found herself laughing.

From: Winston@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela_Ziegler@Overwatch.org, MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org Subject: Updates to Athena’s Servers

All:

Athena will be down for some updates to her servers. Her systems will not be shut off completely and all scans will still be running. You will still have access to your emails, communicators, and all other access you have to the base and surrounding areas.

The systems that will be down for maintenance will be the administrative access, direct access to archived information on her encrypted servers, and some access to the shared drives and mission reports. Other systems will still be running but there may be delays while her system updates.

Systems will be down from 0500 to approximately 0930. We apologize for any issues this may cause.

Best,

Winston

From: D.Va@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org, MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

Lame.

-Sent from Mobile

From: D.Va@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org, MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

UGH. Why did I get my own email sent back to me?

-Sent from Mobile

From: Soldier_76@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org, MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

Who is “Med_research_ass_1”?

-Sent from Mobile

From: Genji@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org, MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

“Research ass”?

-Sent from Mobile

From: MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

Researching your ass.

Somehow Dr. Ziegler managed to give you a butt and made your codpiece look like a thong.

Worse in some ways is that it is a better than the butt you had before Shimada Hanzo tried to kill you.

Medical Research Assistant 1 Overwatch Medical Bay 5 Gibraltar Watchpoint

From: D.Va@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org, MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

LOL! □

-Sent from Mobile

From: Genji@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org, MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

This better not be who I think it is.

-Sent from Mobile

From: MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

I am that I am.

Medical Research Assistant 1 Overwatch Medical Bay 5 Gibraltar Watchpoint

From: Soldier_76@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org, MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

1. “Reply All” does not need to be used for this chain.

2. Who is “med-research-ass-1”?

-Sent from Mobile

From: Genji@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org, MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

WHO GAVE YOU TERMINAL ACCESS AND AN ACCOUNT

-Sent by Mobile

From: MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers 1 Attachment: Murad_the_Tiger.jpg

Use proper punctuation - Shimada Sojiro did not spend that much money on tutors for you to completely disregard all of their  lessons.

Also, did you know that there are websites dedicated to anthropomorphic animals in very sexual poses?

For your viewing pleasure.

Medical Research Assistant 1 Overwatch Medical Bay 5 Gibraltar Watchpoint

From: Genji@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org, MED_Research_Asst_1@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

You and I are going to have some words.

-Sent from Mobile

From: Genji@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

Everyone, I woudl like to sincerely apologize for “MED_Research_Asst_1”.

It twill not happen again.

It was someone taht should not have access but our security has not been compormised. I will speak to Winston about riscinding their access.

-Sent from Mobile

From: Mei-Ling_Zhou@Overwatch.org To: Group: Active_Field, Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

* would

*it will

*that

*compromised

*rescinding

Proofreading is recommended before sending :)

Mei-Ling Zhou 周美灵 Climatologist and Data Analyst Antarctica Watchpoint

From: Mei-Ling_Zhou@Overwatch.org To: Angela _Ziegler@Overwatch.org Subject: Fw: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Updates to Athena’s Servers

Good morning Dr. Ziegler,

I was wondering if you knew where Ramen had gotten that picture? The one of the tiger?

Asking for a friend. I think they would really like to see more ;)

Mei-Ling Zhou 周美灵 Climatologist and Data Analyst Antarctica Watchpoint

She didn’t see Ramen for another two weeks, mostly because it and Genji were away on a mission.

“Ramen misses you,” McCree whispered to Angela. “I can hear it - they’re on their way back I guess. As soon as it’s within range, it’ll be here to see you.”

That brought a smile to her face and she waited in her office for it to return. She was just adjusting the gift she had picked up from town when Ramen appeared in the air above her. “Hello there!” she exclaimed as the dragon twisted and twined around her gleefully. “Welcome back!”

The dragon leaped into her arms, coiling its long tail around her waist as they hugged. It was awkward since Ramen was longer than she was tall and at its widest its barrel was as wide around as her arm and it had such short little arms but they made do.

“Did you miss me?” she teased and Ramen rubbed its face on her shoulders like a cat. “I got something for you.”

She had very carefully not wrapped it in gift wrap, instead choosing to tuck her gift into a bag with tissue paper. Ramen dragged the book out, inspected the cover critically, and then looked up at Angela.

“Athena released the details of your search history to me,” Angela admitted. “So I saw what you had been looking up before they banned you. I thought that while we wait for everyone to cool off, you could take a look at some of these books.”

Though Ramen didn’t have a face that could make expressions that were easily recognizable to Angela, she very well understood the wicked humor in its eyes.

“One more thing,” she added and logged in to her terminal. As Ramen shifted so it could watch over her shoulder, she queued up the slideshow of pictures that she, McCree, and Mei had prepared in its absence. Ramen’s long body tightened around her so that she could feel the rumble of its laugh like thunder all around her.

Every free space of Genji’s room from desk to wall to ceiling to floor to bookshelf to desk was covered in pictures of anthropomorphic animals in vulgar or suggestive positions.

[spacehologramcollection]

Request; Kombat Krew and embarrassing dating stories.

I cannot remember who requested this for the life of me! But this was a nice and easy ask to do! The rest are coming don’t worry! I’m just a wee bit tired and need some rest! But here it is, some Embarrassing dating stories. Mix of NSFW and SFW, some are just NSFW or SFW, some are a mix. Warnings; NSFW below the cut, 18+, mentions of Kano but its a shitpost, me telling the fucking truth about him!  GIFS aren’t mine/ Don’t belong to me. 

Kabal;

·         SFW; He once got lost on the way to your date. This man, is not good with directions. It’s the last time he uses apple fucking maps. He was panicking a little on the inside. He’d sent you like ten sorry messages, about him being potentially late. He was praying you wouldn’t think he was standing you up. He ended up sitting on a bench, trying to work out where the fuck he was. He looked up, saw you sat in the restaurant, smiling, holding back a laugh and waving. He fucking died on the inside. Had to wave back and smile. Recovered his pride and walked in. Apologised for being super late and offered to make it up to you.

·         NSFW; He once, during one of the first times you were intimate, made the ‘I’m Kabal’s deep in you’ joke. You weren’t disgusted or repulsed by it. But you started laughing, laughing so hard that you lost balance and fell back. Your laugh is infectious to him, so he started laughing. His cock was still in you but you both couldn’t deal with it and had to stop. Like, tears were coming down your face. It’s such a shit fucking joke. Bonus NSFW; he’d always wanted to try shower sex. You were down for some sensual dicking in the shower, turns out, it’s harder than the movies make it out to be. He slipped and chipped a tooth on the side of the bath. You’ve also broke a sink when getting too heated in the bathroom. Accident prone Kabal is a thing. He needs to wear his damn glasses more.

Sub Zero (Kuai Liang);

·         SFW; Okay so dating for him is awkward anyway. He’s confident in everything but his love life. You’ve the patience of a saint to put up with him at times. He’s not a pain, he just takes things very slow. Anyway, during one of his more sleep deprived states, he thought it would be cute for him to pick you out a book to read. He was planning on going on a long-haul mission, one that would take a few weeks at the most, so he wanted to give you something to pre-occupy your time. Isn’t he considerate? Plans changed, he asked Bi-Han to deliver the book to your quarters, because he had to go. Fucking Johnny Cage being impatient. Bi-Han, being the little shit lord that he is; changed the book to the Karma Sutra. He literally gave you it and said it was from Kuai. You had a lot of fucking questions to ask him when he got back. He was fucking beet red on the tips of his ears, regretting that he ever saved his brother.

·         NSFW; Because of his inexperience in the field, there are a fair few awkward and potentially embarrassing encounters. But this one takes the cake. You laugh about it now but at the time, he was fucking mortified. You had asked him very nicely to cum on your face. He wasn’t sure, but like, how hard could it be to cum on someone’s face? The answer, hard when you over think it. You’d been giving him some top-notch head, like he was so enthralled and enamoured by it; you’d reduced him to a hot mess. Well, when it came to it, he pulled out but was unsure where to aim. Whilst he was trying to think about it, he just kind of, jizzed on your face… getting it in your hair and partially on the sheets. He was fucking mortified. How could his aim be that bad? Maybe he should ask Erron for aiming lessons. You tried to laugh, but then it got in your mouth, so you were howling. Kuai was embarrassed. Because he’d just cocked it up. He laughs at it now, but only because he can actually aim now. Fucking hell.

Kenshi;

·         SFW; He once planned the perfect date. One of his old school style ones. The type of date that has never failed him before. Okay, he’s prepared, he’s going to surprise you and take you to the best joint in town… you get there and its closed. Turns out, it had rats and roaches. He’s gutted, because why the fuck did he not think to research beforehand? He’s kind of embarrassed, because this is so unlike him. It turns into you two eating hot dogs on a nearby bench and giggling about it. You found it funny, and it was a nice evening, so you ended up having a nice walk and just talking. Probably one of your best dates. Every time he asks if you fancy going out, he will always suggest that place, because its funny and he needs to laugh at his mistakes... Don’t tell Johnny, Takeda or Hanzo, he will never live it down.

·         NSFW; He can sense when you’re having impure thoughts about him. It’s just something he’s good at tuning into. What a useful skill. Well, he was sensing you, thinking about last nights activities. And you were really going into detail. He was far too focused on you, that he became a bit bold and brash, asking you outright if you were always this naughty before proceeding to describe what he’d do to you tonight… and queue Johnny laughing. So yeah, Johnny overheard a bit of dirty talk coming from Kenshi to you. You tried to stop him, trying to warn him that Johnny was attempting to sneak up and give him a scare. But nope. He was too busy thinking with his penis.

Raiden;

·         NSFW; When you asked him if he’d be up for you giving him some sweet, sweet head. He panicked. What the fuck does one say in a situation like this? Panicked a little bit too much and actually, really, did say ‘I Must consult the Elder Gods’ he froze, had he actually just said that. You found it funny, leaning back and gesturing to the sky, before saying ‘You better go ask them quick, my soaps are on soon’ It become a little inside joke between the two of you. He doesn’t know shame or embarrassment, so he found it humorous. Maybe because it made you laugh so much. So yeah, anytime you ask him if he fancies trying something new, he will always ask you that.

Scorpion (Hanzo Hasashi)

·         SFW; So, this happened before you were dating. You were both having a few drinks, one led to two, two led to four. And soon he was on his arse. He is not a great drinker, he avoids it because he will be tit over arse, before he knows it. You ended up helping him to his room, he’s heavier than he looks. Just pure muscle and all that BDE of his. Anyway, when you finally get him to his bed. He may, before he fell asleep, have admitted that he wants YOU to spoon HIM. He likes to be the little spoon when he feels a bit softer. So yeah, when you let out a chuckle. One eye will shoot open, his lips kind of curl together so their pencil thin. He cannot believe he just said that. God damn Sake. Why is it always Sake!? He knows it loosens his lips a little too much. But that all fades when you slide into the bed next to him, beginning to spoon him and giving him a kiss on his neck. Promising it yours and his secret.

·         NSFW; Right. So, he does known his own strength and knows sometimes, his Scorpion side kind of creeps up on him. So, when you two are fucking, it’s pretty normal to start with. Until you ask him to go harder, and harder and harder. Eventually coaxing the Scorpion side out of him. This fucker raises his kinky head out of nowhere. Starts pounding into you at the exact pace you want. Like fucking hell, the force of a thousand suns type pounding… and you heard a creak. The bed fucking breaks. He fucked you so hard. The bed broke. You both kind of fall off it and onto the floor. He’s mortified, cock still balls deep in you, his eyes are wide, and panic is setting in. Johnny is staying over, in the room below yours, and now he’s probably awake. Because it was loud.  How does one recover from this? Well, simple. He loudly compliments your stance, before offering you advice on how to improve your form. Fucking smooth. Some Kombat advice whilst he’s balls deep in you. So yeah, he has the power to break a bed. If that isn’t big dick energy, I don’t know what is.

Erron Black;

·         SFW; He has so many cute pet names for you. And he’s actually a big softie at heart. He just wants to flatter, worship and make you feel divine. So, he has a habit of sending cute messages whilst he’s at work. He knows he shouldn’t, but he can’t help himself. One day, during a sleep deprived state, he types up a rather cute message. About how he cannot wait to get home, cuddle and have a bath. Ends up sending it to Kabal instead of you. Queue Kabal asking what bathbomb he’s going to use, who’s going to be the bigger spoon and if there will be some Barry White background music. He’s thankful it was just Kabal who received the message. Because he can deal with that little shit. All he has to do is hide his glasses and threaten to out him for collecting dolls. They aren’t dolls, their action figures, but to Erron they are the same thing.

·         NSFW; He’d snuck you into base. He knew he shouldn’t. But you were horny, he was horny, everyone was horny. You’re both being really quiet, as quiet as you can possibly be. He’s got his hand over your mouth, he’s biting his lip real good. Like there will be no noises tonight! Even though he’s dying to hear them. One problem, he didn’t give a damn good reason to why he was going to his room early. He just said none of your damn business. Not a good excuse. Queue Kabal coming in and asking if he had the new Wi-Fi password. Kano in tow because he wants to watch Porn. Because he’s fucking disgusting and nobody loves him. So yeah, they caught him dicking you. It was not a pleasant experience. Kabal just kind of stares before leaving, like he isn’t that desperate for the password, he’ll come back when he’s finished. He actually says that. Kano pulls up a chair and asks if he wants pointers. Erron tells him to get the hell out, unless he wants a bullet in his face. Kano scoffs, but he keeps a gun on the nightstand just in case. One shot just to the left of where he’s sitting, and Kano is gone. You were shielded mostly from them, just your face on show, but still. Fucking mortifying.  

Kung Lao;

·         NSFW; Once for a joke let you try on his hat. Because he thought, hey, that would be cute, seeing you in his hate. Oh no. It was more than cute. He got hard watching you wear it, attempting to toy with it. My god why is his dick so hard?! Can you tell?! Please say you can’t tell. He’ll end up shifting, trying to hide it, because this cannot be normal. You ask if he’s fine and he’s like ‘Oh yeah, me? Sure. Fine and dandy. Fine. Yeah. Sure.’ He’s fucking burning up on the inside though. He must resist temptation to ask if you wanna wear it whilst you fuck. But the fucking hat on you, it makes you look so powerful and strong. Long Story short, you do end up fucking, and you’re still wearing the hat whilst you’re fucking. He’s like ‘Please don’t tell Liu Kang or Raiden. Or just anyone.’ The Great Kung Lao is smiling down, with such fucking pride at him right now. Wiping a tear away from his spirit eye.

[overwatch-imagines-hub]

Overwatch: Favorite Pets

This has been in my drafts a long time, so I decided I’d clean out some of my personal ideas before I continued with requests. Enjoy!

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Men

Mccree

Dogs (two, to be specific)

hoRSES

Just an entire petting zoo, honestly

Not even joking, get the man a petting zoo

He loves alpacas

Genji

His dragon

Maybe one dog

Maybe a dog and a cat

Also birds are great

Hanzo

His dragon

A cat

Or multiple dogs

Like four dogs

Big, cozy, happy doggos

Also lizards

He likes snakes too

Soldier 76

Dogs

Big dogs

None of those small yippy dogs

Just big ole dogs that think they’re lap dogs

Reaper

Probably too scared about caring for another living creature to get a pet

Definitely a dog person

One nice cuddly dog

A fluffy dog

A very fluffy dog

A dog he could use as a pillow while laying on the floor

Lucio

Rescue animals, specifically

Rescue dogs, rescue cats

Probably mutts

He also likes small birbs

Roadhog

A pig

Come on, it’s a given

It’s named something cute, like Curly or Oinkers

Junkrat

Wants some fuckin’ wild animal

Like a bear or a tiger

Raccoons, trust me on this

Reinhardt

bIG DOGS

Zenyatta

Birds

Lots of little, happy birbs with pretty chirps

Bird-friendly stray cats that he’s fed and trained

Doomfist

One dog

A medium-sized good boy

He’s trained it to sit on his back while he does push-ups and other things like that

Women

Sombra

Loves cats but they climb on everything

A miniature horse that acts like a dog

Symmetra

A cat that she’s somehow managed to train

Fish!!

A giant fish tank full of pretty fish

Widowmaker

Not an animal person

Probably something really low maintenance

Maybe a tarantula

D.Va

Dog???

Dog!!

Big dogs!!!

But also cats??

Cats!!!!

A monkey??

A bear cub???

Animals!!

:D!!!!

Mercy

A couple cute lil birbs

Birbs that’ll sit on her shoulders while she reads or works or does chores

Just happily tweeting

Also a cat trained not to hurt the birbs

Birb-friendly cat

Tracer

Dogs

Specifically medium-sized ones with lots of energy

Mei

A polar bear

She can’t have a polar bear? Watch her.

Fine, maybe a couple bunnies instead

Zarya

Huskies

Two giant lap dog huskies

That’s it, the end

Pharah

Honestly, would probably love reptiles

Propose to her with a giant snake and she’ll marry you right then

Also she totally already has a pet turtle

Ana

A good ole dog

Thinks horses are pretty great too

[otome--gokoro]

Hello! can you write a hc reaction where the mc give the lords a teddy bear/ or any animal plushy? Thank you!

Nobunaga receives a puppy plushie as a substitute for the puppy he won’t let himself keep. He hides it during the day so that no one else will see it. He won’t get rid of it because 1) it’s a present, 2) …he just really likes it okay, stop looking at him like that

What else can Mitsuhide possibly get but a cat? He displays it proudly in his office and strokes it when he’s trying to figure out something difficult. It’s getting ragged alarmingly quickly. Everyone is worried.

Yukimura gets a tiger cub because everybody knows he’s a Shingen fanboy. He keeps it on his shelf. Saizo has caught him talking to it before. Yukimura lives in fear of Saizo telling everyone.

Saizo receives a tiny kitten plushie, in memory of the kittens that preferred him over Yukimura. He keeps it in MC’s room and moves it onto her pillow before leaving on missions. It keeps her company when he’s away.

Masamune is shook when he receives his rather clumsily made falcon plushie. (Birds are hard, okay?) He realizes how much effort MC has put into it and is super touched. He keeps it in his bedroom and pets it when he needs a pick-me-up.

Kojuro gets Bontenmaru… #5? 6? Who knows. He is very charmed. Sometimes he puts it on top of actual tortoise Bontenmaru and watches them crawl around together like the proud tortoise dad he is. Shigezane is just like dude I can’t believe you’re an actual adult

HOW CAN INUCHIYO GET ANYTHING BUT A DOG and you’d better believe he’s salty about it. He can’t say anything because it’s a thoughtful handmade gift… but whyyyyyyyyy

Hideyoshi gets a really cute monkey plushie. He goes around displaying it to the retainers and the maids. …basically, he just wants to show off. He drags her with him, of course. She’s on show too.

Ieyasu receives a tanuki plushie. He’s just like, do you think you’re funny? Do you? Do you??? He keeps it in the very back of his closet. He’ll never hear the end of it if Hanzo sees it.

Mitsunari gets a monkey plushie in Hideyoshi’s honour. He keeps it in his office. When he’s asked about it, he gives a long speech about Hideyoshi’s greatness. People don’t seem to stay in his office for long anymore.

Kenshin gets a colorful songbird plushie. It’s gorgeous and perfect and he loves it so much. It joins the other treasures in his hoard. He doesn’t have a favorite, exactly, but if he was forced to say…

Shingen gets a horse plushie that looks exactly like Kurokumo. He proudly displays it on the door of Kurokumo’s stall. Kurokumo nibbles on it occasionally, much to MC’s dismay.