#; listen I know Monsters are awful but they always give me a good kick of motivation when I need it sooo

[itsbitmxdinhere]

OK today I'mma send memes to the people I have left from those meme call posts I did and then replies , I'm extra motivated today been rehearsing and stuff so let's cross fingers I can get some writting done aslkmflñdsmkflasñkdmf

[swiftlymoniquesblog]

One Call Away - Sam Winchester x Reader

Loosely inspired by One Call Away by Charlie Puth in which the Reader calls on Sam as she’s going through a rough time. 

Listen to the song here

A/N: Hello! So this is once again one of those fanfictions that is based on what I’m really going through. I can’t get into details about what actually happened but I am a bit inspired and I wish I had someone like Sam (outside of my family) to turn to in times like this. I've been working on this one for maybe 6 months or so? It's been a long time coming so I hope you enjoy it!

As always, Supernatural masterlist | Masterlist of all Masterlists

Warnings: Mean people, crying, swearing, fluff, angst, language

Word Count: 3992

“You are a bitch!” The words of Judd Nelson in The Breakfast Club rang through my ears every time I looked at her. If I had to deal with her mistreatment one more time……

Okay, so it wasn’t always like this, in fact, it used to be really good but then again, it all seemed like a phase. It didn’t make any sense, all of a sudden I was out and looking in and it was not okay. The environment around me was so toxic, that I dreaded going there every day. I didn’t know what to do or who to go to so I went to the one person I always knew would be there for me. Stepping outside, I pulled out my phone and dialed his number. 

“Sam? Hey, can we talk?” I ask, hoping he isn’t busy.

“(Y/N) of course, what’s going on?” He said I can tell the concern in his voice.

“Work is just becoming too much for me and I don’t know what to do. I feel like no one likes me, people are trying to get rid of me, and I feel like I don’t have any ideas on how to fix the problem.” 

“(Y/N) I’m sorry, that’s awful. What happened?”

“I don’t know what happened or what changed, I just all of a sudden was kicked out of the crowd and it feels horrible. I work hard and I try to do everything that is required of me. I love my job and the people I work with but something changed for the worse.” I say, starting to cry. I couldn’t help but let all the feelings out because this was going on for months. 

“Hang on, I’ll be right there,” He says, the line goes slightly as the tears keep falling. A few moments went by and there was a knock at my door. 

“Oh sweetheart,” Sam says, pushing the door closed behind him and wrapping his large arms around me. Sobs just wracked through my body as the stress of the last few months boiled over. 

Right before I started this job, I met the Winchesters. I didn’t even mean to meet them but I’m glad to have them. They were in town working a case and I had assisted them in pulling information on what may have killed the person they were after. Don’t worry, I’ve known that monsters are real before I met them. My great-grandfather was a hunter, my grandfather, my father, and it would’ve gone to my brother but the tradition is, it goes to the oldest child. So I’ve grown up in the life and have seen everything. Of course, the guys were thrilled to know I knew so much about monsters and some best practices to destroy them but I wasn’t allowed to actually hunt at all. I was just used to giving information but I was damn good. So I was asked to move into the Bunker for easier access but I ended up having to get a job because my assistance wasn’t being requested as often. Things were great at first but everything changed and it was awful. Of course, the Winchesters were overprotective because they said they saw me as a sister, and they wished they could do something to help me. 

“They’re doing what to you?” Dean had yelled, not at me but at the situation. “I’m going to make them pay for treating you like that.” 

“I appreciate that Dean, but I don’t want you to do anything,” I explained to him and Sam. They both frowned when they couldn’t help me but it was something I needed to handle myself.

“But (Y/N) you’re being treated unfairly. You do see that right?” Sam asked, more concern showing up in his features. 

“Yes Sam, I know, but let me handle this first and if that doesn’t work, I’ll ask you guys,” I say and make sure they both understand before I go back to my room.

Authors POV

“Why is she being treated so badly? She really enjoyed her job and then all of a sudden, everyone turned on her?” Sam stated, not fully grasping what happened. 

“I don’t know Sammy, but we gotta figure out how we’re going to help her,” Dean said.

“Dean, you know what she said, she doesn’t want our help.”

“The hell she doesn’t. She’s too nice to start something like this. She needs to be protected.”

“Look I think she can be too nice too sometimes but she’s also tough as nails in certain aspects. She doesn’t let anyone push her around so we just have to trust her and believe she will find a way to come out on top,” Sam says but he doesn’t trust those words himself. No, Sam is extremely protective of her and will do anything he can to make sure she is okay. He could never tell her why he feels that way, maybe because he doesn’t know himself, but when it comes to her, everything is different. 

He paced the length of his bedroom, which was rather small for his long strides, and that made him frustrated because he would have to stop, turn, then go back to pacing, only to have to start all over again a few seconds later. The cell phone that sat on his bed taunted him, telling him she wouldn’t call to say she needed him. He would get flustered, running his large hands through his hair, slightly tugging on the ends of his neck as he would groan. He hated waiting and hated that she wasn’t calling sooner for his help. It irritated him that anyone was treating her poorly because she didn’t deserve that. She was smart, brave, funny, beautiful, strong, resilient; nothing standing in her way but this? This was more than she could handle, he thought. This would upset even him and he was used to this kind of crap but as long as he’s known her, she didn’t deal with things where she was being used or people didn’t like her. Okay, so she’s only been a part of the team for six months, but she became family as soon as she decided to move in with them. 

A few hours passed and Sam had fallen asleep waiting around. He refused to help Dean with a case that had come up because he was so concerned with (y/n) and he knew he needed to be around in case she needed him. He would’ve slept longer if it wasn’t for his phone waking him up with a rather annoying buzzing sound.

“Hello?” He answers the phone, trying his best not to sound as though he was just asleep. 

“Sam?” A small voice came through from the other end. She sounded timid almost; something was wrong.

“(Y/N) what's wrong?” 

“Something happened and I need your help; I’ve lost control. 

"Okay, where are you?"

"Down by the lake, about two miles from the Bunker. I'm in my car." 

"Stay there, I'm coming to find you."

Luckily, Dean had come back from his hunt and it ended successfully.

"Dean, I need to borrow Baby. (Y/N) got into a bit of a situation and she really needs help," the younger brother says to his older brother, in a way he hasn't seen his baby brother for several years.

"Dude, of course. Is she okay?" Dean asks.

It took Sam a few minutes for him to find the words to answer. He looked like a fish gasping for air on the land; he truly did not know.

"I don't know. She sounded so scared and fragile…." A single tear fell from his eye, knowing the person he cared for most in the world was in great need of someone to be there for her.

Dean had only seen this behavior in Sam one other time and that was when he was sent to Purgatory. This must've been serious. 

"Take whatever you need. Just make sure you're good before you drive; you don't want to get hurt yourself. Call me if you need me."

"Thank you, Dean." Sam grabbed the keys to the Impala from the table a jacket and his phone before speeding away to try and get to his friend, in her weakest moment. 

The drive seemed endless but it only lasted ten minutes. He saw her small vehicle parked under a tree, close to the lake but still a good distance from the shoreline. It was dark, with only a few street lights a few yards away. Sam had the idea of turning the Impala's headlights on, hoping to illuminate the view around (Y/N)'s car and as a way to make himself known. 

"Sam?" Her voice rang out into the night.

"I'm here," he answers her.

The sound of a car door opening and shutting came and went and the next thing Sam knew, (Y/N) was running into his arms as she let all her pent-up emotions fully go. With her still in his embrace, he bent down so he was sitting on his knees, with her head resting in his jacket. He held her close, afraid to say anything, for fear it was too soon for her to speak. So, he sat with her, rocked her, and occasionally wiped the tears from her now puffy eyes. Even at this moment, his heart swelled. See, Sam finally figured out why (Y/N) was different; he was in love with her. Yes, he had fallen madly in love with her yet could never find the right time to tell her. Now was definitely not the time but when she would look up at him, tears brimming her big (y/e/c) eyes, he felt it in his soul; he adored her. He knew he would do anything for that girl and he ached to help her when she was this hurt. 

How dare anyone treat such a beautiful and kindhearted person like her? He had thought to himself. He couldn't fathom why anyone would be so cruel to her but he pledged to himself in that very moment, he was always going to be there for her; Superman had nothing on him.

Sam's POV

"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked, wanting to know what happened since she seemed more calm.

"I was called in by my boss and had a meeting with human resources. It was so stupid and I felt like I was being targeted. I threw up because it's just been too much and I've been so stressed. I'm gaining weight and I'm eating more crap; I hate this," she answers and my heart breaks further

"(Y/N) you need to get out of there. It's not healthy for you to be in that environment."

"I know but I don't want to quit; it wouldn't look good for future jobs."

"Fuck getting another job! Just stay with us and we'll have work for you to do. You don't have to worry about anything; we've got you." I say, reassuring her that we will always have her best interest at heart. 

She looked back at me with these big, wet, puppy dog eyes and I felt my heartbreak further for her. "I wish I could but I just can't."

"Well, I'm not stopping until we figure something out that would be much better for you and I'm not giving up until we think of something because goddammit (Y/N) I care about you."

The air in the room felt very thick and everything was quiet, (Y/N) not saying a word, not looking at me and Dean, well Dean had shot me a look and a grin, knowing what was behind this sudden statement. I gave him a mental plea of 'please leave.' I was relieved when he just smiled and left the room.

"(Y/N) are you okay?" Again, she remained quiet for a moment before finding the words to say. 

"What do you mean you care about me?" She asks.

"Well, I've always cared about you, since we've met," I answer, trying to put off the true answer.

"But when you've said this before, Dean has stayed in the room; he just left." I took a big sigh and then I decided it was time.

"Sam, what are you saying?" She asks, her head slightly turned to the side, much like Cass does when he's confused.

"I'm saying I care about you, as more than just a friend. I've been crazy about you since you came to stay with us and with all this shit happening at your work, all I wanna do is wrap you up in my arms and protect you from all the mean people," I finish my statement, my eyes never leaving her face. 

There's an agonizing silence as I try to read how she's processing all this but then she finally speaks up.

"What are you waiting for?

I take that as an okay and I grab one of her arms, tugging her into my body. She's safe and she's warm in the protection of me. My arms snake around her and I feel her taking a big breath in and out; her whole body relaxing. Time had passed and I wasn't sure how much of it had but I savored every moment of it. I slowly untangled her from my arms as she looked up to me. Not a single word was spoken but I took the lead and pressed my lips to hers. She reciprocated, pressing her smaller frame to mine by stepping on her tiptoes to reach me. We stayed together for a short while, but it meant everything to me.

Two days later Sam was on my side through everything but it was time to go to human resources to find out what they could do for me. 

“Sam, I'm scared.” 

“I know you are baby, but I’m here and I’ll be with you as long as you allow me to be.” He takes my hand and drives me down to the department where we would be meeting with a representative of human resources. We arrive and as he parks the car, he brings my hand up to his lips and leaves them there for a bit. 

“You ready?” He asks.

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” I say, gripping his hand a little tighter. We walked in and were met by the specialist. 

An hour or so passed and it was determined I would be going on a leave. A few weeks away from my workplace I could not be more relieved to be out of that situation. In fact, so much pressure had built up inside me that it exploded in tears from my eyes. Sam just held me tight and made sure I knew he was there. I was going to be spending every day with Sam and Dean and I felt a bit odd about it, knowing I wasn’t going to be able to help too much.

“Nonsense sweetheart, you can help us research our cases,” Dean stated.

“Could I come with you guys?” I ask.

Sam and Dean shared a concerned look but Sam spoke up first. 

“It wouldn’t be fair to leave you alone while you’re on leave but you have to promise us, you’ll listen to everything we tell you. We care a whole lot about you and these cases can get pretty dangerous. Stay close, don’t wander off, and shoot when we say.”

“Wait, you guys trust me to shoot someone? I’ve never done that before,” I state.

“We’ll teach you. We have more time now so we can get you ready,” Dean said. “Sammy, you got this?” 

Sam glanced at me and looked to read my face, waiting to see if I would object. “If she’s up for it.” 

I sucked in a hard breath and nodded. 

“Then I will take her on.” Now it was my turn to read his face. It wasn’t as easy but I managed; he looked slightly uncomfortable. 

“Sam, can I talk to you for a minute, in private?” He nodded and followed me out of the room. 

“You don’t have to teach me to shoot. You looked uncomfortable; I can ask Dean,” I say.

“No I want to,” he says.

“Then why do you look so annoyed by it?” 

“I’m not annoyed, I’m worried. Our line of work can be really dangerous; I don’t want you to get hurt.” 

“Well I’ll be fine, you’re going to train with me; I’ll be a hunter.”

“That’s not something to be excited about, (Y/N). We kill people and creatures.” 

“Sam, I know, I’m not excited per se but I am interested in learning more about you and what you go through every day.”

“But you can do that without doing what I do,” he says.

“Look, I really appreciate your concern and you’re right, I don’t have to do this to get to know you better but I don’t want to be alone for twelve weeks and I can’t ask you to give up hunting just for me so if this is what it takes, then teach me. Show me what I need to do to stay safe,” I said going over to him and wrapping my arms around him. He holds me close, his head resting on my head. 

“I care about you a lot, you know that, right?” 

“I know, I do too.”  

A few weeks later, Readers’s POV

Time seemed to have gone by rather quickly. The more hunts I went on, the easier it became. I took it as not killing people as much as killing creatures who may have been human at one point but aren’t anymore. I was continuing to stay busy with the boys, hunting, traveling, researching, and staying in more crappy motels than I could count. The job was taking a toll on me, on all of us, but we all grew closer and the boys treated me like I was their sister, well that was until Sam started distancing himself from me. It began as small ways for him to separate himself; not interjecting in conversations about hunts, simple nods or shakes of his head, answering with “hmm” instead of actual words. Then it grew into staying behind during hunts, not eating food with Dean and me, and overall just not acting like himself. 

“Hey Dean, have you noticed a change in Sammy lately?” I asked one day while he was driving us home from a hunt. 

“You mean any more than usual?” He jokes, always having to pick on his younger brother. 

“I’m serious, Dean, I’m worried about him!” I say, slightly swatting the elder Winchester. 

“I don’t know (y/n), maybe you should go talk to him, see what's bothering him,” Dean suggested.

I figured that was the best idea so I decided to do just that. I was a bit infuriated and when I walked, I added more pressure to each step, making sure Sam knew I meant business. I finally found him in his room, lying across his bed, as if we weren't worried about where he was.

“You better have a damn good reason for acting so off, Sam,” I say, making myself known.

“(Y/N)” he says, suddenly sitting up to look at me. 

“Well Winchester, what's your problem? You've been acting weird, especially around me. Did I do something wrong? Are you mad at me? What is it?” I asked, both hands on my hips, staring down at him.

“No, it's not that,” he says.

“Then what? I mean I thought everything was fine between us but you've been acting so differently towards me! You can't look at me for long, be around, or talk to me. It's almost as if I annoy you or something. Is that what it is Sam? Am I annoying? Do I bother you? What?!” I practically yell at him.

“I love you,” he says, calmly and not initially meeting my eyes. I go to say something else but just stare at him when his words sink in.

“You what?” I said, not immediately grasping what he was saying. 

“You’ve been through hell lately, with how everyone treated you at your job and you felt like the whole world was against you, you turned to me and I was always there for you. No matter what time of day, if I was out on a hunt or preoccupied with something else; I stopped for you. And in the midst of it all, I fell in love with you. Never in all my life have I connected with someone the way I have with you and all I want to do is protect you and make sure no one hurts you ever. I just hope you feel the same about me because I haven’t had much in this life but I hope to have you because you are who I am proud of, who I want to wake up to every morning, start a family with, maybe even retire from the hunt.” He said, looking at the tears that were steadily falling from my eyes. 

“I love you too Sam. I couldn’t have expected you to be the person I would turn to amid my darkest time but you were always there and you helped me realize there’s more to life than just working a job where I wasn’t appreciated or even valued for that matter. You’ve shown me what it means to love someone more than just myself and to be fully open and raw to someone else and I cannot thank you enough for that. You are my Superman; always there to save my day and my life. You are my heart's desire, my perfect man, the one I hope to spend the rest of my life with. I love you more than I have ever loved anyone else.” I admitted and the smile on his face was pure, unbridled joy. He took a few strides and took my face in his hands, just gently but enough for me to feel that he was in control. He took his time, watching my eyes the entire time except for the few times his gaze dropped to my lips and back. Making sure I had given silent permission, he finally brought his lips down to mine, just a small, chaste kiss to test the waters then when he saw my response, he brought our lips back together with a passion and urgency I wasn’t expecting from him. His hands moved from my face to my hips, bringing our bodies flush against one other, fear in both of us that this moment would end. I grabbed ahold of his shirt in both my hands, holding onto him with every ounce of strength I had. When we finally pulled away, there was a sparkle in his eye, one that solidified the next step.

“You know, now that we’re together, we can mess with Dean.” He suggested. 

“Oh yeah? Like kicking him out the room or make-out sessions in the backseat of the Impala?” I suggest. 

“Ah, now that’s my girl, exactly what I was thinking.” We both laugh before going back in for another kiss. In the end, Sam was who I needed. The person who was always there for me to run to when I just grew too frustrated with life. He was my biggest supporter and always made sure I had everything I needed or ever wanted. And all he ever was, was one call away.

[dear-ao3]

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks!

Youguys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey

sticks,dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All

right,here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no!

You'redating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be

lunch formy iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former

queenshere in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see

how,by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but

thereare other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your

smokinggun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out

likethis. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. - Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. - Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I'm the pea. - The pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic... ...without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security. - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Oaptain, I'm in a real situation. - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species... What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! - Is that another bee joke? - No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. - Who's that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But

isn'the your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. - What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flower. - I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see

anickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

- bee movie anon

[spiderling-space]

This idea is inspired by @zozobegone ‘s this post 

Setting: Grim goes platonic yandere mode when he realizes MC is going to go back to their world

It is written from Grimm's perspective

Italics indicate thoughts

🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱

The Great Grimm

Warning: Unhealthy dependency and friendship

"Henchperson, give me those candies!" Grimm ordered (Y/N) after trying so many times to reach the top shelf.

"Aw, you couldn't reach yourself?" (Y/N) had seen Grimm jumping and trying to climb to take the candies. They didn't do anything but watch him fail for the last 10 minutes, they couldn't help themselves as he was being so cute. "What's the magic word?"

After grumbling a little, Grimm spoke coercively, "Please..."

"That's a good boy!" They patted him on the head before grabbing the candies and giving them to him. 

He started devouring them the moment he got his hand on the candies. He thanked them quickly before focusing entirely on his food. They were just so delicious, he couldn't resist it!

"Honestly Grimm, what will you do once I'm gone?" They sighed as they took a seat in the kitchen.

The words didn't register for Grimm at first. "Eh?" He stopped eating for a moment and looked at them. "What nonsense are you babbling about?"

"Hmm? Oh! Well, you know, it's been months and lots of progress have been done. Crowley finding a way for me to return home is right around the corner." They spoke as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"That birdman doesn't do anything but whine and pin all the tasks on us."

"I convinced him to do the actual work and he made a progress on finding a way for me to go home." (Y/N) stood up, walking toward him and kneeling to his height. "I'll give you a secret, I haven't told anyone this." They gulped before smiling, "Crowley found the way for me to go back. We just need ingredients and get some tests done then I'll be able to go back. I haven't told others about it yet because I wanted to have something concrete but since you are like my second family, I wanted you to know first."

Huh, he thought.

Grimm continued eating, ignoring what (Y/N) had said who got up and left the kitchen after sharing their secret. At that moment, it didn't bug him at all since he thought they were joking.

🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱

It didn't even pass a week that (Y/N) started to tell the others that they would be leaving soon and ask their help to get the ingredients and spend their last days together. Meanwhile, Grimm became more and more irritable as the days passed by.

Grimm didn't have a family nor a friend. When he opened his eyes to the world, he was in a back alley by just himself. He fended for himself and decided to become the greatest magician when he heard people talking about Night Raven Collage. He didn't have anyone who supported his dream nor he needed one. He would accomplish it on his own and show everyone how great he was. Of course, things didn't go as planned and he got thrown off the moment he revealed his true self at the entrance ceremony and was even threatened to get eaten. What's worse was that when he returned to NRC, showing the persistence of an NRC student, he was about to be thrown again. That would be the case if it weren't for (Y/N) sticking up for him. He wasn't a sentimental monster and he hated to be called cat by (Y/N) despite his catly activities as they called it. However, deep down he knew it was because of (Y/N) that he became a student in the NRC, getting one step closer to achieving his dream. Heck, he and (Y/N) were considered one student together.

It wasn't just (Y/N) creating him an opportunity that made him care about them, it was everything. They studied together; they slept on the same bed, shared meals and snacks, played games, did homework, complained about the school and students together. Not to mention, how much he enjoyed getting petted, belly rubbed and washed by them. They had each other when no one was around and always stood against overblot student together. In Grimm's eyes, they were an inseparable and astonishing duo; even a family he never had, not that he would say it out loud.

Maybe that was why he was miffed by everything that was going on... What would happen to me if (Y/N) were to go back? Become alone again? Get kicked out of NRC? Have no friends and family? No, that's not going to happen!

As the days passed, the attention he got from (Y/N) diminished gradually, came to a point that he only saw them in classes and when they got back. They were out with another person every day, not sparing enough time for the Great Grimm. 

How dare they, he thought while heatedly huffing and puffing on the couch.

Grimm dearly missed the old times when (Y/N) wasn't obsessed with going back. He didn't even receive enough petting last few days nor they studied together. His mind wandered to their time spent together when he noticed something. (Y/N) would leave everything behind regardless of how important it was when he got into serious trouble or got hurt. They would sweep in to save his neck. It just clicked at that moment. 

He would get into trouble or injured to get their attention on him. However, then the other minions would gather around them too and their attention would be divided. It was not something he wanted. An idea struck in his head after a few minutes of thinking. As expected out of the Great Grimm, it was a brilliant plan.

🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱

"Oh my goodness, Grimm! What happened to your paw-paw?!" (Y/N) rushed to his side, kneeling and examining his paw.

Grimm grumbled acting as if he didn't want to tell them. "Nothing, Great Grimm is fine!"

"Don't be ridiculous! It looks broken!" The worry on (Y/N)'s face was gratifying since he got their attention back.

"Ask your best friends," He answered with faux melancholy, withdrawing his paw near his chest and turning back as if he would leave.

"What does that supposed to mean?" They asked, confussion evident on their face just like Grimm wanted.

"Azul tricked them into doing his work and asked them to collect all the feathers on the roof. Ace and Deuce took me with them then we got into a fight and I fell off the roof." He lowered his head for extra effect.

"And they didn't even take you to the infirmary?!" He managed to get them riled up.

"It was my fault th-"

"That's not an excuse! For fuck's sake! C'mon, we are going to the infirmary." (Y/N) wrapped their arms around Grimm and lifted him en route to the hospital wing.

"Hey (Y/N)! Do you -"

"I can't believe what you two did!"

"What we did?" Deuce mumbled, fearing their wrath.

"Don't talk to me for some time and at least take responsibility and apologize!" (Y/N) stormed off before Ace could finish his sentence. Both Ace and Deuce look perplexed as (Y/N) marched away. Grimm was looking at them over (Y/N)'s shoulder, taking in their puzzled looks and flashing a grin as (Y/N) walked away.

🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱

For the next two weeks, Grimm continues with his plan.

"I swallowed a lot of soapy water." Grimm said as he was rubbing his belly, it genuinely hurt. Swallowing soapy water was more awful than hurting his paw.

"Azul! You promised to not do this and shame on you Jade, Floyd!"

3 more down, plenty to go...

"Leona, have you seen Grimm? He is way smaller than you! How couldn't you realize what your claws would do on Grimm?"

"Ruggie, Grimm got food poisoning because of you! You could have just stolen his food instead of replacing them with expired ones."

"Jack, I've never expected this from you. I'm very disappointed."

"What? What are you talking about?" Jack asked hastily but it fell on deaf ears as (Y/N) didn't even listen to him, grabbing Grimm and leaving them standing.

Woo hoo! My plan is working fantastically! 

"He could have died Kalim if it were higher!"

"Jamil, I thought you would stop making people poison taste. Grimm has been puking all day long because of you!"

Grimm grinned wickedly as he was once again carried by (Y/N).

Wait until I'm done with all of you! HAHA, You cannot defeat me!

Grimm was thinking of new original ways to distance (Y/N) from the rest of Heartslabyul, Pomefiore, Ignihyde and Diasomnia. The last one would be the hardest as he had a powerful competitor who also sought (Y/N)'s attention but it didn't matter, Grim would be the only one!

That was what he thought until Birdman came bearing the news...

"(Y/N)! Good news! All the tests we did on the mirror worked! You can go back now!"

Everything stopped right there and then. 

Grimm was so focused on getting (Y/N)'s affection and attention that he forgot about the tests they were doing on the mirror.

Now I am too late...

"My goodness! Thank you! I missed my home so much! I'll start saying my goodbyes!" (Y/N) spoke rapidly, they truly were happy to hear the news.

Happy to leave me all alone!

"No worries, they all gather around the magic mirror, waiting for you." Birdman informed, "Are you coming now?"

"Yes!" (Y/N) said before turning to him, taking him in arms and carrying him outside.

That is not how it was supposed to go...

As they were walking outside before leaving the Ramshackle perimeter, Grimm jumped on the ground.

"What's wrong?" (Y/N) stopped to ask.

"What's wrong?!" Grimm couldn't contain it anymore. everything was too much.

"(Y/N), do you need a moment to say goodbye to the dorm?" Birdman questioned, getting closer to where they were standing.

"Uhm... yes... I mean I spent months here so I should say goodbye to it. You can go, we will catch up in a moment."

With that Birdman walked away, leaving (Y/N) and Grimm alone.

"Is there something you wanted to talk about?" They asked idiotically. 

Are they too dumb to understand?

As Grimm was about to tell them what was on his mind, unfiltered, he felt a power within himself. A power that wanted to surge out of him and he let it since he had nothing to lose anymore.

"You will leave me all alone!"

"But you already knew that, Grimm. This place isn't my home and if I took you with me, you would be discovered and people would do experiments on you." Their voice was so soft as they tried to reason with him but none of them mattered.

"We are one student together, you can't leave until I graduate!" The power inside of him grew even more.

"Well, Crowley said he-"

"We fought the monsters together. We are a team, you called me your son!" He could feel that power getting closer

"I-" He wasn't going to let them speak anymore!

"So you see me as a family but you abandon me!" He felt the power leak outside and he didn't even care about it.

"GRIMM!" (Y/N) yelled, taking a few steps back. "I, I, I changed my mind, we will be together!"

"You want me to have no one again!" Grim screamed, not even noticing how his voice changed. "AAAAAHHH!"

Everything went black for a moment and the second he reopened his eyes, everything was different. He was no longer looking up to (Y/N); he now was looking down on them. They were so tiny.

"YOU CANNOT LEAVE!" Grimm screeched when he saw (Y/N) backing and running away. He jumped, landing right in front of them who fell on the ground from the shock and still trying to crawl away.

"G-Gr-Gr-Grim, i-i-it's me! We are friends, remember? I know you wouldn't hurt me because we are family, innit?"

"It is too late for everything but you are right. We are family..." Grimm said, his voice echoing, giving it more menacing feelings. 

Grimm was no longer waiting for (Y/N) to understand that they couldn't leave him. He had no intention of waiting anymore. He leaned towards them slowly, biting their clothing and lifting them.

It was always (Y/N) who carried Grimm around relentlessly now it was Grimm's turn. Once he was sure that they wouldn't fall, he took off, running away from the Ramshackle, leaving NRC behind.

[geraltrogerericduhautebellegarde]

Let It Be Me

Hello all! It’s finally time to post my Novigrad Exchange fic! Big thanks to @ohnomybreadsticks and @jaskiersvalley for taking the time to organize this! <3 And of course thanks again to Socks for the beta help <3 <3 

This is for the incredibly talented @journeythroughunknownlands

Geralt overdoses on potions and the most efficient way to burn them off is with an orgasm (or two... or more). Queue Jaskier, loyal best friend who is always willing to lend a helping hand (or other body part 😏). Seasoned with a hearty sprinkle of pining.

This will be cross posted on AO3 later today. 

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: frottage, blow jobs, anal sex, bottom Geralt, multiple orgasms, pining, requited feelings, happy/hopeful ending

3.9k words

-

Geralt felt the potions burning their way through his veins, lighting him on fire; he had taken too many. The endrega colony was much smaller than anticipated and the fight was much shorter than it would have been otherwise, far too short of a fight to help him burn off the toxins in his blood.

His skin felt pulled tight, and he knew just what he would look like. His paler than normal complexion would be marred with black veins, his eyes would look like pots of ink, the color of ichor, he would look every bit of the monster humans thought him to be.

Fuck, if he didn’t find a good way to let off some steam and work this out of his system, this would take hours to wear off. He was out of White Honey and didn’t have any honey suckle on hand to make more, and he doubted he would be able to find any.

Looking around the clearing he was in, he quickly dismissed the idea of getting himself off. He was painfully hard in his trousers, and a quick wank would be the most efficient way to burn through the toxins, but this wasn’t the place for it. There was far too much noise in this particular forest, making him wonder what curious creatures would come to investigate. He also didn’t bring any of his… toys with him. He didn’t need them, of course, but they made things a bit more enjoyable and typically sped up the process. No, he needed to get back to town and figure something else out. It was unlikely he would be able to find a whore willing to lay with him, no matter the coin offered, and he really didn’t have much to offer.

He could always try to sleep through it or take care of himself back in his room where his toys were, though that would mean making his way through the inn looking like he did, if the innkeep would even let him up to his room.

Sighing and deciding that he really had no good option, he turned, his trophies in hand, and began the trek through the dense trees back to town.

-

Geralt really should have stayed in the forest. He had known better but ignored the small voice in the back of his head trying to talk sense into him. Instead, he allowed himself to return to town despite everything he ever learned at Kaer Morhen, despite every bit of real-life experience reminding him that exposing himself to humans in this state was an awful idea.

If the toxins in his blood felt like fire, the horrified stares were even worse, like daggers stabbing into his already sensitive skin.

Thankfully, he managed to get to the inn without incident, despite the stares, despite the hatred and fear he could smell emanating from everyone he passed. And despite the shocking waves of pain and pleasure shooting through him as he walked with his erection straining against his trousers. The silence in the inn was unsettling though, all speech coming to a halt as he stepped through the door, and he had to push down a wave of embarrassment, knowing that everyone would be able to see his erection. Silence, though, meant he wasn’t being kicked out and allowed him to make his way up the stairs and to his room.

His room that he was sharing with Jaskier.

Fuck.

He hadn’t thought about it until he opened the door, it hadn’t even crossed his mind. Jaskier’s presence had become such a normal and routine part of his life that he hadn’t even thought about the bard being there, about having to deal with Jaskier in this state.

There was no way he would be able to stay in the room like this. He had to fight back his arousal for the bard in the best of times, and this couldn’t be called the best of anything. The bard’s scent was already one that intoxicated him, and now with all of his senses heightened, there would be no way he could stay in the room with him, it would be pure torture if he tried. Quickly making up his mind as Jaskier stared at him in surprise, Geralt stomped across the room to grab his bag of toys, there was no chance he would be able to ride this out with Jaskier not even ten feet away, smelling and looking the way he did.

Geralt could hear Jaskier’s voice clearly, though his racing mind couldn’t parse out the words. He could smell the bard’s confusion, hear it in the tone of his voice, but he couldn’t bring himself to even grunt out an explanation as he made his way back to the door. All Geralt could focus on was the sudden need to go back out to the woods and take care of himself. It had been a long while since he had last gotten the opportunity to use some of his favorite toys, so he might as well make the best of an awful situation.

As he reached for the knob on the door, he felt a sudden tug on the bag in his hand and he spun around just as it ripped, the contents spilling on the floor. Geralt couldn’t think of a time in which he had more desperately wished it was true what they say about witchers, that they felt no emotions. Geralt let out a frustrated growl, the absolute mortification within him warring with the anger he was feeling at Jaskier for trying to stop him just led to more desperation for a fix to his situation. He had just wanted to escape the inn and take care of himself, solve the problem in the relative privacy of the woods, but no, nothing ever went that simply for him.

“Geralt?” Jaskier’s voice was tentative in a way that it normally wasn’t, far more hesitant than the rather direct bard ever bothered being. Geralt’s eyes snapped up to meet Jaskier’s as the witcher willed himself to remain calm. He was sure his face would be turning red from embarrassment if it wasn’t for the poison affecting his complexion and he sent off a silent thanks to whoever was listening that at least he was spared from that.

“Geralt? Are you okay?”

Geralt wasn’t sure he understood what Jaskier was asking. He had expected Jaskier to be more afraid of him in this state, having never seen his reaction to taking potions before, and far more concerned by the toys now scattered across the floor, rather than if he was okay.

“Fine,” he finally grunted out, hoping Jaskier would stop looking at him with such concern. It wasn’t a look that he needed directed at him, he would be fine if he could just leave.

“Fine?” Jaskier squeaked, “You don’t look fine! You look like you’re dying! Geralt, are you poisoned? Are you dying? Can I help? What do I need to do?”

Taking a deep breath and nearly choking on the scent of the bard, even more overwhelming this close, Geralt finally managed to motion to the floor, littered with his rather extensive collection, “Potions. Those… help.” There was no way he would be able to say more, not about this subject, not in his current state. Possibly not ever. 

He watched as Jaskier stared at him consideringly before looking down at the floor, and then back up at Geralt. His eyebrows were furrowed in confusion, but Geralt didn’t know how to explain it any better.

Jaskier reached up, touching at Geralt’s face hesitantly, “This is because of your potions?” Geralt nodded, leaning into the touch. It was just this side of too much but it felt so good.

Humming softly, Jaskier glanced back at the floor, “And those… help?”

Geralt nodded again, still relishing in the contact of Jaskier’s hand pressing gently against his face. There were so many feelings thrumming through him, embarrassment and worry and arousal but Jaskier’s touch seemed to almost calm them. Unfortunately, it seemed that it couldn’t last and Jaskier pulled away, making Geralt whimper at the loss.

“How do they help?” Jaskier asked as he knelt down in front of Geralt. The witcher watched in horror as Jaskier meticulously gathered the contents of the now destroyed bag before placing them on the small table in their room. “Is it something about the toys themselves? Or is it just the… result.”

Geralt could feel his throat closing up as he choked out, “Result.”

Watching Geralt closely, Jaskier made his way back across the room, concern still written clearly across his features, “Where were you going?”

“Woods.”

“Do you… normally take care of this in the woods?”

“Yes,” Geralt felt just as weak as his voice sounded suddenly, he felt exposed like a raw nerve and it hurt.

“Can I help you?”

Geralt felt his entire body seize up as his mind slowly caught up with Jaskier’s question. Letting out a whine, he found himself reaching out for Jaskier before he even knew what he was doing, before he had even made a conscious decision.

Jaskier stepped closer, allowing himself to be wrapped in Geralt’s arms as the witcher buried his face in Jaskier’s neck. The bard smelled so fucking good and Geralt wanted this so badly, had wanted it for years. But Jaskier didn’t, surely. Geralt should let go.

But Jaskier’s hands were suddenly trailing up and down Geralt’s back comfortingly, and Geralt couldn’t let go, it felt amazing, like nothing he had ever allowed himself to experience before, and he couldn’t give it up. With any luck, the bard wouldn’t hate him for his actions tomorrow.

Inhaling deeply and letting the bard’s scent wash over him, Geralt made up his mind. He would get whatever he could from Jaskier tonight and then spend the rest of his life making it up to the bard.

He felt Jaskier start to pull back and he only gripped harder, clenching Jaskier’s doublet in his hands. Jaskier made a soft sound, “Hey, it’s okay, but we should take this over to the bed, okay?”

Geralt could hear the logic in Jaskier’s words, but he didn’t want to let go. Instead, he shuffled forward slowly, his face still buried in Jaskier’s neck, until he could feel the impact as the back of Jaskier’s knees hit the mattress. He urged Jaskier back on the bed, settling himself into Jaskier’s side, still hiding his face.

Jaskier’s hands began running through Geralt’s hair, making the witcher let out a purr and Jaskier chuckle, “I always knew you liked your hair played with. Is this what you want, darling? To lay here and cuddle until you feel better? Or do you want more?” Geralt didn’t think he would ever want to let go, but he needed more. As nice as this felt, he could still feel his cock, hard and heavy and uncomfortably pressed against his pants.

Whispering his answer, Geralt practically begged for more.

Suddenly, Geralt found himself on his back, Jaskier hovering over him. The bard’s scent was now tinged heavily with his own arousal and Geralt couldn’t hold back another whine as he bucked his hips, seeking friction. Jaskier smirked down at him, lowering his body until they were pressed against each other. Geralt could feel Jaskier’s own hardness pressed against his and he groaned out at the sensation. How many nights had he dreamed of this same thing? Of being pressed up underneath Jaskier, desperate for pleasure to be wrung from him, at the mercy of Jaskier’s talented hands.

And mouth.

Gods, he’d had so many fantasies about the bard’s mouth, taking him apart, bringing him damn near to tears. And now here he was, with all of those fantasies in arms reach. His lust had completely fogged his brain, completely overpowering the potion-induced fire in his veins, replacing it with an even more powerful burn.

“Is this what you wanted?” Jaskier asked, his voice low.

All Geralt could do was nod, his hips still grinding up desperately into Jaskier’s. The fire was raging inside him now, completely overwhelming him. He wasn’t sure exactly how Jaskier managed to get both of their clothes off, but the next thing he knew they were pressed together, skin to skin. Geralt was crying out from the sensations, both too much and not enough, as Jaskier kept talking to him. The whispered words doused the fire just for a moment until Jaskier’s lips chased his words, reigniting the fire to burn even brighter. Geralt had never understood poets when they said they had found themselves out of their mind with pleasure but then again, he had never experienced this.

He was unbelievably hard, his cock ached and throbbed where it lay, pressed between him and Jaskier. It could have been seconds or hours that he spent rocking against Jaskier for friction before he found himself so very close to the edge of orgasm.

Jaskier licked a stripe up Geralt’s neck to nip at his ear, “That’s right, Geralt, take what you need. You look so beautiful like this, just take what you need.” It was Jaskier’s words, whispered like a filthy secret in his ear, that finally tipped him over just as he asked, “Are you going to cum for me?”

Geralt let out a mewl as his body shook under Jaskier, his orgasm hot and intense, feeling as though it may never end. He felt hazy almost, the once intense fire settling down to a manageable smolder even as Jaskier trailed kisses down his body. Watching closely, Geralt found himself enraptured at the man above him, groaning as Jaskier continued down, licking up Geralt’s spend as he went. 

“Fuck, Jask,” he gasped out as the bard continued on, his tongue lapping at Geralt’s still hard cock.

The bard smirked, “Ready for another round so soon?”

“The… potions. They keep me… excited.”

“Well then, we’ll just have to work them out of your system.”

Any response Geralt might have thought of was lost as Jaskier promptly wrapped his lips around the head of Geralt’s cock. Geralt could barely stop himself from thrusting forward, fucking into Jaskier’s mouth. It looks so pretty, stretched obscenely around Geralt as he bobbed up and down.

Geralt gasped as he felt a finger probing at his hole, circling it slowly, applying a slight pressure but never pushing in. Just as suddenly as the contact had started, it stopped, Jaskier pulling his mouth away as well, making him keen, his arms already reaching toward the bard, desperate. “It’s okay, darling. Let me just get some oil, okay? This will be much more enjoyable that way.”

Oil. Right. If he was going to be fucked, then oil would make it better. That made perfect sense to Geralt, but still he followed Jaskier’s form greedily and he hurried over to the odds and ends now strewn across the table in their room, picking up a small bottle, and heading back over to the bed, a small smile on his face as he positioned himself between Geralt’s legs.

Geralt made a satisfied noise as Jaskier set a hand on his thigh, stroking up and down, “Is this what you want darling, what you need? Want me to fuck you?”

“Please.” The plea was ripped from Geralt’s throat almost as if it weren’t him speaking. But it was him and he had never before felt so desperate. He wanted Jaskier fucking into him, wanted their bodies writhing together. He wanted the best kind of fire back, lust and passion burning his veins as he looked into Jaskier’s eyes. Fuck.

Thankfully, Jaskier needed nothing more from Geralt, and wasted no time, slicking his fingers and going back to toying with him, “Look at you, so needy for this, I bet I could slip right into you with no prep.”

Fuck, Geralt couldn’t help but groan, “Please, anything, please.”

“Shh it’s okay, soon. I want to make this good for you,” Jaskier’s voice was soft as he leaned forward, locking his lips with Geralt’s as he pushed a finger inside. He hadn’t been wrong, Geralt took the finger easily, more than ready for the feeling. Rocking his hips, Geralt searched for more.

Pulling back and smiling at Geralt, Jaskier’s eyes crinkled up at the corners in the way that always made Geralt want to smile with him. “Are you feeling good? Ready for more?”

Geralt tried to speak, he really did, but all that came out was a needy sound as he ground down on Jaskier’s hand.

“I’ve got you, darling, I’ve got you.” Soon after, Jaskier was pressing another finger inside him, thrusting in and out and it was so good Geralt could do nothing but pant and whine as he moved in time with Jaskier, seeking his own pleasure.

It was so good but it was still just a tease of what was to come.

“Jaskier, please, fuck. Fuck me.”

“Okay, just one last thing.” Before Geralt could even register the sentence, Jaskier had leaned down, wrapping his lips around Geralt’s cock again, just as he curled his fingers, pressing against that spot inside him.

Geralt cried out, his body shaking as he came so hard he saw stars. Relaxing back onto the bed, Geralt whimpered helplessly as Jaskier released him, his fingers slipping from his hole.

“Do you still want more?”

Opening his eyes was a struggle but he managed after a moment, shooting a glare at Jaskier, “Fuck me.”

Jaskier chuckled, “Alright, alright, I’ll get on with it, then.”

Geralt watched in a daze as Jaskier pumped his own cock, covering it with slick. The man was large and it would certainly be a stretch. His own cock was already hard again, twitching as he thought about how good that would feel inside of him. Moving forward, Jaskier lined up and began to push in, gasping as he did so.

It had been so long since Geralt had been fucked. Typically when he was out wandering the continent, all he had with him to relieve this particular want was his bag of toys, and fuck it felt so much better when it was the real thing.

Geralt watched as Jaskier sunk into him, their hips meeting softly as Jaskier panted above him. The stretch was amazing, just the right amount of pressure to make it overwhelmingly good. Geralt tried to stay still, he did, but after a while he had to move. The roll of his hips pulled a grunt from Jaskier as he threw his head back in pleasure.

“Just a moment, fuck, you’re tight.” Jaskier was breathless, gasping out his words, sweat beading on his brow.

Geralt had never seen him look more amazing.

Jaskier began thrusting in and out of him slowly, the burn of the stretch and the feeling of fullness sending sparks of pleasure through Geralt. It wasn’t long before Jaskier sped up, shifting more until finally, he moved just right, drawing a yelp out of Geralt as he hit his prostate. A smirk lit up Jaskier’s face as he pulled out and thrust back in, his aim precise as he once again hit that same spot again and again. The bard kept going, sending Geralt into a frenzy of begging and crying out. The fingers of Geralt’s hand were threaded with Jaskier’s, held down above his head. Geralt’s other hand was gripping at Jaskier’s back, his fingers digging into the soft skin as Jaskier kept thrusting.

“Won't- last,” Jaskier gasped, his free hand coming up to wrap around Geralt’s cock.

It was likely only seconds but it felt like hours when finally he felt himself falling again, his orgasm rushing through him, his body relaxing into a boneless mess as Jaskier thrust once, twice more, freezing his motions and shaking as he spent inside of Geralt, finally collapsing on top of him.

“I don’t know if I can move,” Jaskier said, his voice muffled from where he had buried his head in Geralt’s chest.

“Mmm. Don’t.”

“Okay.”

And then Geralt was asleep.

-

The first thing Geralt noticed was how dry his mouth was. It wasn’t unusual, not after a hunt. His potions would have that effect on him most of the time, particularly if he struggled with burning them off. He went to shift, suddenly noticing the heavy weight on top of him. Opening his eyes, Geralt couldn’t see anything but a mop of brown hair. Inhaling deeply as he tried to gain awareness of his surroundings, he was assaulted with the scent of Jaskier and himself and sex.

Oh fuck.

Geralt shifted slightly under Jaskier, making the bard startle awake on top of him. Jaskier seemed to gain awareness quickly, rolling off of Geralt quickly, his cheeks blooming a brilliant red on his otherwise pale face.

“Ah,” Jaskier cleared his throat, his eyes darting around the room, “good morning. I trust you’re feeling better.”

Geralt nodded, sitting up and reaching for the pitcher beside the bed, drinking straight from it. He felt some of the water spill out, dripping down his naked chest, but paid it no mind as he tried to wash the dryness from his throat.

Fuck. He really came back to the inn with potions burning through him and let himself fuck Jaskier. Well, let himself be fucked by Jaskier. Well… begged to be fucked by Jaskier.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Putting down the now empty pitcher, Geralt shot a furtive look at Jaskier, feeling the guilt pooling in his stomach. Jaskier was loyal to a fault, something Geralt had taken for granted for so long, and now here he was, after a night of going out of his way doing something he had no interest in doing, looking at Geralt with nothing but concern for the witcher. Jaskier was too good for Geralt, he didn’t deserve to have to deal with situations like this.

“I’m sorry.”

Jaskier looked taken aback, “For what?”

“Making you feel like you had to help me last night. I appreciate it but… I’m sorry.”

“I… Geralt I offered to help. I never felt obligated and you never did anything to make me.”

It couldn’t possibly be that easy, could it? Geralt’s needs had been far more than anyone could be expected to help with. Jaskier should have sent him on his way and spared himself the trouble.

“Geralt?” Jaskier said softly, moving closer and reaching up to cup Geralt’s cheek, “Thank you for trusting me with this. I’m glad I could help you.”

Whether it was the earnest sound of Jaskier’s voice or maybe just Geralt’s need to believe that someone really did want to be there for him, he was unsure. All he knew was that he never wanted to break Jaskier’s gaze. His eyes were so incredibly blue, bright pools of crystal clear water begging for someone to dive in and Geralt found himself ready to jump. 

Before he noticed what was happening, Geralt had already leaned into Jaskier, making his eyes widen, surprise written across his face. But he didn’t pull back. No, Jaskier’s eyes flicked down to Geralt’s lips before once again meeting Geralt’s gaze. Geralt wasn’t sure if it was him or Jaskier that initiated the all encompassing kiss that followed, all he knew was it was something he had wanted for so long and felt so right.

Maybe, next time potions were burning through his veins and he wanted to crawl out of his skin, Jaskier would meet him and apply this affection like a balm, soothing Geralt in a way he had never before experienced. Maybe from this moment forward, he wouldn’t wait for Jaskier to realize he deserved better and move on. Maybe, just maybe, Geralt had really found happiness.

-

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[whatifyoulivelikethat]

monster, m | myg, jjk

pairing(s): yoongi x reader x jungkook

summary: Mafia boss Min Yoongi and his bodyguard Jeon Jungkook punish you for being a smartass. Oh, I guess there’s some plot too. Maybe.

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; intense smut (fem reader, threesome, unprotected sex [get tested please], creampie); abuse;  non-idol!AU - mafiaaboss!AgustD!Yoongi (black-haired Daechwita AU), longhaired!tattooed!Jungkook; mercenary!reader; Jungkook has a praise kink; you have a pain kink (maybe psycho tbh)

--

You raised an eyebrow at him.

“And?”

He tapped the air with his black card.

“Order anything you like.”

A beat passed in silence. You shut the leather menu you were holding and placed it on the table. You closed your eyes slowly and blinked at him.

“I don’t think this date is going to work out.”

You turned and were about to get up from your chair, only to have a gun pointed right between your eyes. The smile the guard gave you was almost angelic with his full lips.

“Jimin, get that gun out of her face.”

You gave Park Jimin a venomous glare. The sunglasses meant you couldn’t see his eyes even if you wanted to. The private room at the restaurant meant there were no one was watching.

“Shoot it. I honestly don’t care.”

“We both know that’s what you’re really aiming for.”

After a long moment, you turned back around to face him. Him and his scar over his right eye. A fresh reminder every time that you were the one who did that. His brown eyes seemed dead.

“How long do you plan on acting like a bitch?”

He spun the black card against the table. You hated it when he flexed how much money he had and he knew it. He didn’t do it because he was arrogant. He did it because he knew it pissed you off.

“I don’t know, how long do you plan on keeping me?”

He shrugged casually. The card spun and spun like a tiny black tornado. Then it made a sharp snap as he slammed it to the table. His eyes flickered up to you.

“Forever.”

Min Yoongi.

You were supposed to kill him and you got caught. The only time you had ever been caught. In your defense, it wasn’t because you were bad at your job. You almost had him. The scar proved it. At this point, it didn’t matter if you killed him or not. Your original contact was now dead. Min Yoongi owned everyone who as anyone in the city. Blackmail, money, whatever it took. Maybe mafia boss was too cliché of a title for him. You, on the other hand, didn’t care what he did. It wasn’t as if you were some kind of angel either. Min Yoongi was just supposed to be another number to add to the list of people you killed for money.

And, well, there was no meaning to that money now, considering he basically owned the banks.

You were pretty sure there was something wrong with you. Something was a little off. People didn’t become mercenaries out of the goodness of their hearts, after all. Maybe you caught on to killing a little too easily and felt a little too little. Maybe causing chaos was a little too fun. A little bit of an anarchist, perhaps.

Yoongi cocked his head at you, his black hair covering his eyes a little. He had been trying to convince you to work for him all this time, but you didn’t see a point in it. He had nothing to give you. Money? There was nothing to buy and nowhere to go. Fame? Not quite the title you wanted as a mercenary. Power? Fleeting as far as you were concerned. Freedom?

Oh, no, Yoongi wasn’t going to let you have that.

“You can play along or I can have Jungkook play with you. Take your pick.”

You flinched. The only reason Yoongi wasn’t six feet under was because of that little shit who interrupted you. Knocked your aim off, caused you to slash instead of stab. A single second later and you were trapped in his muscular thighs, passing out from a triangle choke and armbar combination. It wasn’t just that you were bested. It was that you were bested so easily and without even being able to fight back.

Fucking little bastard.

Yoongi smirked.

“I could go for a game of Go Fish right now,” you sneered.

Yoongi raised an eyebrow. “Ah, you really want it to be like this, don’t you?” He tipped his head and Jimin stepped out. Panic shot through you like lightning. Aw, shit. Yoongi watched your emotions change in an instant. He hadn’t meant play in the innocent sense, after all.

“It pains me more than it pains you.”

You made a face at him. “Shut the fuck up.”

The door slid open.

“Hey, hyung, what’s up?”

And in Jeon Jungkook sauntered. Black oxfords snapping against the hardwood floor. Black hair long and messy, wearing black slacks, matching black vest, and a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up. He didn’t even bother to hide all the tattoos on his right arm. He gave you a cocky smile and looked over to Yoongi for instruction. Suddenly the short black dress Yoongi told you to wear was much too small and much too tight.

Yoongi tapped his fingers against the table.

Out of the two, you definitely preferred Yoongi. Mostly because Yoongi could be satiated.

You inhaled deeply. “I’ll behave.”

Yoongi’s lips curved into a sly smirk. “Begging, are you?”

“I was stating a fact. I don’t beg.”

Wrong answer. But, of course, you said it because you had too much pride to not to be a smartass. Yoongi smiled. His hand stopped moving.

“Are you hungry, Jungkook?”

“What about you, hyung? You haven’t eaten yet,” Jungkook asked inquisitively, hands in his pockets. “I couldn’t eat before you.”

Ugh. They all loved Yoongi like he was some sort of soft animal that needed to be protected. Even Jungkook, who Yoongi let do what he wanted because he was the youngest. You were sure Yoongi had to clean up some messes Jungkook made, which was why he wanted to use you. You were clean in conduct, diverse in methods, and apathetic to the cause. The perfect tool.

The problem was, he couldn’t convince you to do jack shit.

Yoongi took his card and calmly filed it into his wallet. Even though all of his guards were elegantly dressed, Yoongi was in an olive-green jacket, dark green shirt, and grey jeans. Silver accessories. No one could even guess how important he was.

And you? Tight, short, black dress with thin straps. Black heels. No jewelry. Smokey eye makeup and dark red lip. Not quite gaudy hooker, not quite rich wife either. A strange in-between.

Yoongi placed his hand flat on the table. Slowly, he turned It around and curled his fingers toward himself in a beckoning motion.

“Come here.”

You knew he was talking to you. He knew it, you knew it, Jungkook knew it. Jungkook’s dark brown eyes followed Yoongi’s hand, up the length of the table, and then to you. His lips curved into an amused smile. Like a predator to prey. You glared at the two of them. You never listened. You weren’t going to start now.

“You should listen to hyung, you know,” Jungkook purred, taking a step towards you.

“I hear every word he says,” you retort, standing up.

Yoongi tilted his head. Just a few steps and Jungkook kicked your chair aside, pressing his body against you. Hard, unrelenting, hot breath down your neck. You didn’t even look at him.

“Don’t even think about it.”

You narrowed your eyes at Yoongi, facing him as you responded to Jungkook’s words.

“I told you I’m no longer interested in murdering him.”

Yoongi gave you an open-mouthed smirk.

“You regret it now, don’t you?” Yoongi drawled slowly.

One second you were simply standing there. The next you were twisting out of the way as Jungkook tried to pin you against the wall, knee up to defend against Jungkook’s inevitable kick. Jungkook growled, grinning as he dove again. You went low, elbowing him in the thigh to throw off his balance and slam him into the floor. Or would have, if Jungkook wasn’t sturdy enough to simply take it and he drove his shoulder into your chest. You hissed at the contact of shoulder to sternum, already bracing your body as you slid across the floor due to your heels.

You felt a hand grab you by the hair and yank hard, making you hiss in pain as you went down hard on your knees. Fighting Jungkook always took all your concentration. It wouldn’t be that way if he wasn’t such a skilled fighter. Yoongi, however, was an impatient and dishonorable man.

Yoongi held on to your hair and pulled up, dragging you to your feet and slamming you against the table. You let him do it because, well, it was going to become a beating if you continued. Also, Yoongi was more lenient when he thought he was the stronger one. But you didn’t give him the satisfaction of you yelping in pain, even if your ribs felt like they were rattling.

“I think I would be worried if you didn’t try to fight for once,” Yoongi grunted, grabbing your upper arms and dragging you up the table. You tried to twist out of his grasp but Jungkook suddenly appeared between your legs and pinned your arms down.

“Ah, hyung, couldn’t you pick someone more… docile?” Jungkook complained with a pout as you panted with exertion.

Yoongi chuckled. “Are you trying to tell me you want her?” There was a dangerous edge in his voice.

“I’m only saying it would be easier for you,” Jungkook muttered, forcing your legs in their spread position as you were perched at the edge of the table. Hs eyes flitted to yours and it was obvious – the second Yoongi released you from his grasp, Jungkook would be ready to pounce.

“Take what you can get,” Yoongi growled. Coldness touched your skin as Yoongi flipped his switchblade out, slicing through the thin straps of the dress. You gritted your teeth as Yoongi’s face appeared in your vision. “I was going to let him eat you out but I’ve decided against it thanks to your antics.”

“Fuck you,” you snarled.

Yoongi shrugged. He pointed to your upper arm, tapping the implant under your skin with his blade.

“You can go in raw, Jungkook. Finally had Hoseok install it.”

Jungkook took his hands off your arms and began to unbutton his pants. “Seokjin-hyung is going to be really mad if we fuck in his restaurant,” he warned.

Yoongi scoffed. “Then I’ll let him have a taste too if he’s feeling upset.”

“This will not make me tame,” you hissed, looking up to him.

Yoongi gave you an almost-bored look. “That’s not what I’m looking for.”

You gasped as Jungkook yanked your dress up, ass hitting the table. Yoongi laid your arms one over the other above your head so he could hold them with one hand. The other laced around your neck, pushing your head up and forcing you to arch your back uncomfortably. Each silver ring cut into your skin painfully and you growled at him, even as Jungkook pulled out his switchblade and tore your panties to ribbons.

Yoongi leaned down, lips against your ear. His tongue slid out, curling around your earlobe. You stiffened, breathing swallow. He knew how to get you wet. He paid attention to detail, gently nibbling at your ear, listening to the change in your breathing as you gave in to him. You were human after all. You had your erogenous zones. You barely registered Jungkook cutting up the length of your dress, exposing your breasts to the cold. Your nipples hardened as Yoongi blew softly against your ear, whispering your name, almost pleadingly. It didn’t matter if he didn’t mean it.

“Don’t you wish it was me between your legs?” he breathed.

You sank your teeth into your lower lip, trying to control yourself. Your hand found his shirt and clutched a fistful of it in response. Yoongi chuckled and straightened, only to see Jungkook watching your pussy in fascination.

“Ah, so disappointing I can’t eat her out,” Jungkook pouted. “Looks so tasty.”

Yoongi chuckled. “Maybe next time, Jungkook.”

You could hear Jungkook’s pants falling to the floor, but you were still staring at Yoongi, holding onto his shirt. Yoongi seemed to notice your gaze and looked down at you with a smirk.

“What’s the matter? Ready to tell me you love me?”

You let go, scowling. “As–fuck!”

Jungkook entered you with one swift thrust, no stretching out, no warning, just hard dick shoved straight in. You gritted your teeth, breaking out of Yoongi’s grip and grabbing Yoongi’s shirt with both hands, struggling to adjust as Jungkook grabbed your hips and began to fuck you without remorse. You had never taken in someone raw before, and certainly not Jungkook’s rough, wild thrusts. Yoongi held you in place calmly by your neck as you struggled to not make a sound, feeling every vein and every thick inch of muscle pumped into you with vigor.

Jungkook, on the other hand, groaned lustfully as he fucked you, eyes closing as he felt your pussy clamp around him, tight and pulsing.

“Oh, fuck, hyung, it feels so good,” Jungkook moaned, throwing his head back, muscles bulging in his dress shirt and vest. His right hand dug into your hip, tattoos flexing with his tanned skin.

“Are you a spoiled boy, Jungkookie?” Yoongi drawled, voice low. He always watched. It didn’t matter who it was. He liked to watch.

“Yes, hyung.” Jungkook liked to be watched. He had a little bit of a praise kink when it came to his hyungs. He loved Yoongi, as they all did. Maybe a little too much. “Thank you, hyung.”

And well, Yoongi was clever. Even through you never told him directly, it was obvious you loved pain in all senses of the word. Delivering it, receiving it, all of it. Giving you the birth control implant was your gift as much as it was his. He could hear it, the strained moans you stubbornly kept in your throat, the wetter and wetter slapping of Jungkook’s hips against your own, watching with interest as Jungkook’s angry red cock thrust into you over and over.

He held your neck, slowly tightening. Your mind was fogging up, forced to feel the painful pleasure of Jungkook repeatedly pounding you into the table, his cock swelling inside you. Black spots danced on the edges of your peripheral vision, clouding your thoughts.

Jungkook bit his lip, digging his nails into your hips as he came with a groan. You sucked in a sharp breath, feeling hot strings of cum shooting into you, filling you up as he pulled out with a hiss, cum dripping out of you.

He was still hard.

Yoongi let go of your neck and pulled out of your grasp. Before you had time to collect yourself, Jungkook was pushing you on top of the table, flipping you over so you were on your hands and knees. Your shredded clothes fluttered to the floor, heels still on as Jungkook climbed onto the table, pants at his ankles. You could hear his cum plop onto the table from your dripping pussy. A loud scrape and you looked up to see Yoongi repositioning the chair so he could witness your face.

He caught your eye but before you could lash out, Jungkook grabbed one arm and pinned it behind your back, shoving his cock into you once more. You gasped sharply, biting your tongue as Jungkook began to fuck you again, slowly rolling his hips into your cum-filled pussy. He moaned, feeling the extra slickness of your walls painted in his orgasm. Yoongi observed with interest, not looking away. Jungkook leaned down, hand snaking between your thighs.

“Don’t you dare,” you growled, more to Yoongi than Jungkook, but both ignored you. You felt Jungkook’s nail scrape against your clit and you stiffened despite not wanting to reveal that he found the right spot. Jungkook chuckled, voice dropping several octaves.

“Scream for me.”

He pinched your clit and you clamped down hard on your tongue, squeezing your eyes shut as you slammed your fist onto the table. He thrust into you, hard, making you see stars. Every muscle tensed as you struggled to keep in your noises, furrowing your brow as Jungkook pinched and flicked your clit, abusing it. You could feel your pussy clenching and throbbing around his cock, unable to control yourself as you came with a muffled scream. Liquid gushed down both of your thighs, the squelching sounds becoming louder. It was obscene.

Yoongi’s trademark open mouthed smirk appeared as Jungkook came once again, driven by your orgasm. You were filled up once again by his cum, gasping at the sensation of so much inside you. And Jungkook still didn’t stop, slowly beginning again, moaning at the sensitivity of his cock from the back-to-back orgasms. He let go of your abused clit and grabbed your hips. The first slap made you hiss, nails digging into your palm. He kept going, smacking your ass in between thrusts to feel your walls tighten.

“Such a spoiled boy doing such a good job,” Yoongi purred. Jungkook whimpered at the compliment, looking up to see Yoongi nodding in satisfaction.

“Are you hard, hyung?” Jungkook whined, voice softening when addressing the older man.

“Mm-hmm,” Yoongi hummed, spreading his legs a little to readjust. Jungkook watched him closely, trying to see his erection through Yoongi’s jeans. The thought made him even harder inside you. You squeezed his cock and he groaned, shoving himself all the way inside you.

“Let me see,” Jungkook pleaded, raking his nails down your back. You grunted in pain and glared at Yoongi.

Yoongi chuckled. “You want to see it that bad, Jungkookie?” He dragged out the younger man’s name, low and teasing.

“Please,” Jungkook moaned, gripping your side so tight you gasped. “Oh, please, hyung.”

Yoongi glanced at you, amused at your silent scowl telling him to give the man what he wanted. He unbuttoned his jeans lazily. Slowly pulling down the zipper, lifting his hips a bit to slide it down enough to reveal his black boxer briefs. They could see it now, the growing erection straining against his underwear.

Jungkook groaned, rolling his hips into you and hitting your deepest spot. You almost moaned, eyes fixated on Yoongi’s crotch. Jungkook did it again, mumbling to Yoongi.

“Please…”

Yoongi palmed himself through his underwear, taking his time. He leaned back, exhaling deeply as he ran his large hand over his clothed erection. Jungkook was whimpering, desperate for more.

“Hyung…”

Yoongi cocked an eyebrow and sighed, giving in. He always gave in to the youngest. He pulled down his underwear, letting his hard cock spring free. You felt breathless at the sight. Maybe it was Jungkook’s multiple orgasms getting to your head. But it was always like this. Yoongi always made you wait to see his cock. He knew how to make you blind to your own desperation, growing the hungry desire to see Yoongi’s ringed hand encircle his throbbing, beautiful cock, eyes half-lidded in arousal.

Jungkook moaned again lustfully, his pace increasing again now that he knew that he was the catalyst to making Yoongi hard.

“Harder, Jungkook. Fuck her rougher.”

Jungkook obeyed, slamming his hips into you so hard that the whole table shook despite being solid wood. You choked on air, feeling the cum dripping out of you as Jungkook began to fuck you wildly and with reckless abandon, hitting your most sensitive spots. And Yoongi, in all his audacity, continued to watch, still holding his cock. He noticed your gaze and he stoked himself slowly, making you bite down on your lip to avoid moaning. You shoved your cheek against the cool wood of the table, shuddering as you came, overwhelmed by pain and pleasure.

Jungkook hissed, shooting you full of cum once again. The sensation of being so full intoxicated you and you let out and soft whimper, hoping neither of them heard you. But, of course, Yoongi heard you.

Yoongi purred your name softly. You looked up at him, breathing hard, legs shaking. At this point your makeup was messy and your lips a little smeared, hair messy from fucking. He grinned as you winced, feeling Jungkook pull out of you. Jungkook was still semi-hard, the animal.

“Come here,” Yoongi said once again.

You had snarky comments prepared. You had you retorts all filed away. But the sight of Yoongi holding his hard cock, eyes smokey with lust made you forget all of them. Every muscle hurt from your constant strain of staying silent, refusing to let them hear you cries of pleasure. But your resolve was cracking now, seeing Yoongi’s want. You crawled off the table, ignoring Jungkook who was readjusting himself behind you. There was only Yoongi.

“Hold it in,” Yoongi commanded.

You walked towards him, trying not to hobble in your heels. Even now, you were prideful of how you presented yourself. You clenched your pussy tight, not letting Jungkook’s cum fall as you approached the black-haired man.

Yoongi removed his hand and patted his thigh. Wordlessly, you slid onto his lap, your hand lightly guiding him to your entrance. You placed one hand on his shoulder to steady yourself, spying his smug expression out of the corner of your eye.

“Need me that bad, huh?”

“Shut up,” you said hoarsely. Your throat was dry from breathing so hard.

Yoongi chuckled. “I need you too,” he breathed, lips against your cheek.

You sank down on him, eyes rolling back into your head as he filled you up. He was still mostly clothed, the rough denim rubbing against your thighs as you went down. Yoongi moaned in satisfaction, hands trailing up your sides and pressing his thumbs against your nipples. Against your better judgement, a cry left your lips as his cock shoved Jungkook’s cum deeper inside you. You could feel every contour of his cock, every vein pulsating against your walls.

“Mmm, that’s nice,” Yoongi drawled, pressing your nipples down and moving them in small circles. It wasn’t enough. You wanted his mouth on them and he knew it. He smirked. Yep, he wasn’t going to do it either.

You rolled your hips onto his cock. He grinned, pinching your nipples tightly and twisting them. A soft mewl reached your ears – you. Oh, fuck. Yoongi smirked triumphantly.

“Use my cock and get yourself off,” he purred. “You deserve it.”

It was all a trick. A ruse to feed your ego and yet you still did as you were told because he knew how to manipulate you, especially after wearing you out with Jungkook. It wasn’t fair, but Yoongi never played by the rules.

You lifted yourself up and sank back down, breathing hard. All your muscles were sore and yet you still found the energy to thrust your hips into Yoongi, squeezing him tight as you rode him. Yoongi pinched and pulled your nipples, fueling your arousal. He smelled so good, some kind of sharp pine, and it was driving you crazy. With a start, you realized the moans you were hearing were you, saying his name breathlessly over and over.

“That’s it,” Yoongi murmured, eyes half-lidded and smirk on his lips. “Cum for me.”

Shit. If you were in your right mind, you could refuse him, but you were so full of Jungkook’s cum with Yoongi’s dick so deep inside you that you could barely see straight. He kept pinching your nipples, flicking them hard as you went down, shocking your system every time. You came with a cry, gripping his shoulders hard as waves of pleasure raked though you, your entire body shuddering.

“Jungkook, hold her up.”

Yoongi removed his hands from your breasts, only to be replaced by strong, calloused ones. One tattooed, one bare. Jungkook held you firmly. You were panting, unable to look away from Yoongi’s eyes. His scar was an angry red. Those dark brown eyes looked at you like you were his queen, and yet it could all be a lie because Yoongi was a master manipulator. His black hair was pushed back, damp with sweat. He smirked at you, baring his teeth. You had a strange urge to kiss him, but you held back.

“Time to fill you up with me,” he whispered, hands settling on your hips.

The first thrust was slow, languid. Not enough. You bit your lip, feeling Jungkook roll your nipples slowly in between his fingers. Yoongi didn’t just want to fuck you. He wanted to drive you crazy. He wanted you to lose your mind. He sank in again, hissing with satisfaction. He made his cock throb inside you, your muscles clenching automatically in response. Jungkook ran his nail over your nipple and you could feel yourself becoming wetter with every passing second. Yoongi’s lips parted, a low, guttural growl clawing its way out of his throat. It was gravelly and deep.

“The implant was a good idea, wasn’t it?”

You gasped as he thrust in particularly deep.

“First time my cum will be mixing with Jungkook’s, deep inside you.”

Against your better judgement, you whimpered at his words. Fuck. Yoongi grinned, cocking an eyebrow.

“You like that, hm? Being pumped to the brim with cum?”

Before you could respond, Jungkook moaned behind you, pinching your nipples hard. You winced as Yoongi increased the pace, rolling his hips into you easily.

“Wonder how much you can take,” Yoongi drawled, eyes boring into yours. “Should I tie you up and let them all fuck you one by one? See how much cum you can keep in that pussy of yours before I fuck it all out of you?”

You hissed, feeling Jungkook grip your breasts and flick your nipples hard.

“Hyung, don’t get my hopes up…”

There was no way that the wet squelching noises between your hips were only your juices. You could smell Jungkook’s cum dripping down Yoongi’s cock.

“Or would you rather only have Jungkook?” Yoongi purred. He didn’t miss your eyes flashing at his suggestion. He chuckled deeply. “I’m always curious how far Jungkookie’s stamina goes.”

Jungkook was losing it behind you, groaning, pinching your nipples and ramming his clothed crotch into your back. He was rock hard, desperate for friction. Yoongi continued to fuck you, pace increasing ever so slowly.

“I want to see you on your knees,” Yoongi sneered, “Face into the ground, ass in the air, cum overflowing out of you and falling to the floor.”

You gasped, jerking forward from the force of Jungkook’s movements, your lips against Yoongi’s ear and his against yours. Harder, rougher. His lips touched your ear, tongue tracing your earlobe.

“And then I’m gonna fuck you,” he murmured, voice low and deep. “Fuck you until you can’t walk or see straight, and then wait for you to recover, only to do it again.”

You moaned into his ear, softly, falling apart to his words and his tongue.

“Yoongi, please…”

That wasn’t Jungkook. That was you, breathlessly begging into Yoongi’s ear, so quietly that Yoongi was sure Jungkook couldn’t hear you.

He waited, pumping his cock in and out of you roughly, smacking your hips together.

“Please fill me up with you.”

Yoongi made sure to chuckle right into your ear before he slammed you down hard onto his hips, shooting hot strings of cum inside, cock twitching mercilessly against your walls. You moaned his name, hands tangled in his black hair, whining as he pumped you full. He always had so much. You suspected he let it build up on purpose.

He pressed his lips against your ear. You could feel his infuriating smirk.

“Mine.”

-

click here for part ii --

masterpost

[dreamii-yume]

SPOILERSSS for Twisted Wonderland Chapter 6 : 1-16!!!

*rubs hands* aight it wont take long before genshin has me in its gacha hell grasp again, I just barely escaped this time— NOW ITS TIME TO SEE THE BOIS CHAPTER 6 omg— wtf happened last time lol it’s been too long

So, no voice over because of some problems which is understandable but— meh I don’t feel like reading lol So I’m watching otome ayui translations this time, because im that one dumbass student who skipped kanji class and now i cant read without sounding like im five _:(´ཀ`」 ∠): “what up im yume im way passed 19 and i never fucking learned how to read”

Also watching Hanayura Kanon stream for the rest that’s not yet been translated lol Because he’s very good at voice acting for the characters and he’s funny af lol

- OKAY OKAY— WTF HAPPENED EXPLAIN

- Fun fact : I haven’t watched Hercules yet so I legit don’t know what’s about to come lol

- Aw, that’s cute— We called over Ace and Deuce late at night AND THEY REALLY CAME OVER AAAAA

- I forgot how fckin pure their friendship is _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):

- Aight, so we actually have a huge-ass scratch from feral Grim lol That’s just fantastic, isn’t it

- FINALLY— We’re talking about Mickey and the stones my monster cat has been eating with Crowley AAAAA

- “Yeah there’s this bitch called mickey and i took his photo—“

- WE’RE FINALLY TALKING ABOUT THIS. AFTER 6 CHAPTERS.

- Bruh this crystal of blot sounds really dangerous why are we discussing this just now

- Speaking of this crystal, Crowley— you were looking for this crystal in chap one and when we asked you about wtf you’re trying to find you just went— “oH itS NothING.”

- I SUPPOSED ITS NOT NOTHING NOW IS IT

- I didnt see you searching for crystals after every chapter mr. crowley where were you 👁👄👁 dont you think it was weird that you didnt see a single one after like— five blotting incidents

- Oh so its rare i see— BRUH R U SURE ABOUT THAT grim literally found one every single chap LMAO

- Okay okay— see, he may be violent but listen— you aint gonna throw out my fucking cat okay

- Wh— THERE WAS A FESTIVAL!? Im dumb so its not just VDC LOL

- Listen LISTEN— GRIM IS FINE. HOLD UP— NO NEED TO THROW HIM OUT JUST LET ME HAVE ANOTHER LOOK AT HIM

- Aww, Ace and Deuce looked pissed about it too AAAAHH THE TRUE DEFINITION OF THE BOIS

- BRUH NO— ALL THE DORM LEADERS TO GO AND CAPTURE GRIM?? HE’LL DIE

- CROWLEY PLS— WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS, HONEY

- #Grimportectionsquad

- “It’s bout time for them to come” Who?

- FUCKING— CROWLEY STOP SAYING ITS NOTHING— This is why this school is so fucked, you never tell us anything ahead of time _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):

- Aight he left, Ace Deuce hurry help me what you guys got

- He may be a monster but see— the worst he did is eat the whole tuna stack SO PLS HES STILL BABY AND I LOVE HIM

- THATS RIGHT DEUCE MY MAN GRIM CAN DO NO BAD I SWEAR

- HE WOULDNT EVER AGAIN I SWEAR

- Ace ヽ(；▽；)ノ The character development— im so proud of you, son

- THIS IS THE BOISSS— LETS GOOOO

- Fuck this is so beautiful— just me and the bois on our way in the middle of the night to find our MISSING CAT I—

- CROWLEY REALLY DID ASSEMBLE THEM DORM LEADERS AAAAAAA AT THIS HOUR TOO WTF

- BRUH WE CAN TALK

- Kalim Kalim Kalim Vil Vil Vil— Pls we’ve been through so much last chapter ＨＥＬＰ

- Leona…A big fat ｍｏｏｄ honestly lmao

- Ey ey riddle pls— dont make this any more difficult—

- Shut up azul stay where u are all you’ve done is nothing but chaos since you arrive so SHHH

- MALLEUS IS NOT HERE AGAIN LILIA PLS— where is he when we need him the most LOL

- Ortho, your bro where?? Also— SURVIVAL STATUS BRUH—

- YES PLS DONT HURT HIM OMG

- oh i forgot idia lives in his tablet LOL OF COURSE

- Omg he’s in the apple trees still looking scary as shi aaaaaaa pls kitty come home u just had too much catnip

- OH GOD 15m HE’S CLOSE

- “Starting operation” ORTHO WHAT TF

- EY EY EY oh good he’s knocked out sighhh

- Aight I know this has been translated but I can’t help but to look at the original japanese and im just— wtf is RTS and TAS idia i dont understand this advanced gamer otaku language

- But Idia and Ortho really do be speedrunning on who can fucking kick my cat the hardest LOL

- THATS RIGHT IDIA You understand me— Fellow cat lovers unite, Grim is very cute, he can’t do no bad

- …so can i have him back pls—

- Can we just appreciate the fact that these bois are willing to take the risk of getting their heads chopped off by Riddle by doing all this for us??

- If this isnt what you call true friendship then i dont know what this is

- Lol ambrose is going to appear in this festival again and crowley’s prideful ass is QUAKING

- WHY are we not allowed to see him crowley im sure we can handle it— We’re the BOIS. CMON

- Imagine if they just summon a fcuking— magic vet or something lol

- It’s the next day lol

- HAH ITS THE VDC LOSERS BY ONE VOTE SQUAD

- I mean the NRC Tribe— ٩( ᐛ )و

- VIL. what you have my queen

- Vil pls dont remind me that my cat isnt here but thank you for saying thank you i do not deserve—

- AWW THE ADEUCE SQUAD LOOKS SO SAD AAAAA

- Vil i miss the bad bitch but absolute oneesan energy but the apology— yeah are we gonna cry again lol

- AAAAAAHH why am i so proud— THAT vil is apologizing

- You dont need to maam what we had in chapter 5 was a fucking journey i regret nothing

- I swear if rook goes like— bitch that aint beautiful imma bonk him I WILL DO IT dont think i forgot what u did last chap

- Man i love me a man who can openly admit his mistakes MMMGH

- Rook i swear—

- Im glad that we’re not toning down ace’s brutal honesty lol

- BRUHHH I DONT LIKE IT WHEN VIL US TAKING ALL THE BLAME i mean what he said was kinda true BUT STILL

- Cheer up Vil, it’s not like it’s a complete failure anyways (；ω；) it was fun at least

- Hearing Jamil encourage Vil like this feels surreal BUT YES BOI U TELL EM

- What is this beautiful character development

- Ooff way to hit where it hurts the most vil my queen lol

- AAGH IT HURTS VIL RECOGNIZING NEIGE’S HARDWORK LIKE THIS— THE PRIDE I CAN FEEL IT ＣＲＡＣＫ

- Bruh we appreciate Neige’s impeccable smile in this household— REMEMBER WHEN EVERYONE WAS LIKE NEIGE’S GON BE A BAD BOI??? WELP—

- It was me, i was that person and i shall drown in apple juice for it

- Of course, the ultimate Neige simp already knows that lol

- Bruh the background music has no business being this sad　ｓｔｏｐ

- I hate it when vil is right sometimes omg— TRUEEE KALIM especially wouldn’t be able to stand properly on stage after knowing Neige’s own hardships aaaa

- NOO BABY DONT CRY

- Vil redemption arc??? 👀👀 you can help us cure our cat—

- !? Are we gonna get that money promised in that poster?? 👀👀

- WHAA FUCKING WAHAA VIL IS GONNA PAY THAT US??? THE WHOLE 5 MIL EACH??!! VIL CALM DOWN WHAT I SAID WAS A JOKE

- Damn vil is ＳＴＡＣＫＥＤ He really didnt want to owe anyone anything LMAO YES QUEEN

- WHA— KALIM IS ACCEPTING??? OUT OF EVERYONE HERE, I DID NOT EXPECT YOU TO ACCEPT THAT KALIM

- Kalim is making my heart go boom boom again baby boi ✨👁💧👄💧👁✨✨

- HE’LL DONATE IT TO THE RAMSHACKLE DORM BABY BOIIII

- …sumimasen kalim for having a very rundown dorm 👁💧👄💧👁 but thank you for being nice about it lol

- OKAY OKAY KALIM YOU DONT HAVE TO LIST ALL THE THINGS WRONG IN MY DORM PLS—

- THIS IS EMBARRASSING PLS KALIM IM SORRY FOR BEING POOR

- But this man be such a sunshine holy shit i cant even be mad about it lol

- AW YEAH RAMSHACKLE DORM IS GONNA GET A MAKEOVER

- EVERYONE BE DONATING THEIR MONEY TO US AAAAA Were they always this NICE

- Aight adeuce pls— y’all dont have to force yourself to donate my guys (´；ω；`) being friends is enough lol i get it my bois

- Find me a man who can make me feel like this the way Vil can

- Man if only Grim is here :’) he’d be soo happy :’)) you can have all the tuna you want buddy :’)))

- GRIM PLS ADEUCE IS WILLING TO TREAT YOU TO LUNCH BABY

- Bro this is so wholesome omg

- Im sorry but still up to this day, my understanding of Epel’s accent is still　ｌａｃｋｉｎｇ lmao

- Aight they be talking about how Rook already knew that they were going to lose from the very beginning

- The FORESHADOWING LOL The difference with how Rook said “What a wonderful performance” rather than “What a beautiful performance” sigh

- Honestly we gotta respect Rook’s resolve here lol man just knows what he wants

- Rook and Vil’s friendship lmao

- 👁👄👁 …!?

- EARTHQUAKE WTF How dare you ruin such moment—

- WHAT IS GOING ON

- EY WTF DONT DESTROY MY DORM WTF ARE YOU GUYS

- WHAT ARE THESE ROBOTS OUTSIDERS KILL THEM WITH FIRE

- They look like something that belongs to the Ignihyde dorm HUH

- Oh bruh— Vil in his Dorm Leader mode is so cool AND YES I KNOW THIS IS NOT THE TIME BUT wheww~~ Vil YAS QUEEN

- KALIM TOO AAAAAA JAMIL’S 「はっ！」SO COOL

- so SO— the dorm leader’s have a protocol for outsider attacks like this 👁👄👁 OMG THEY’RE SO HOT

- They don’t seem like our bois anymore aaa just pure professionalism at this point—

- GOD I FORGOT HOW COOL THEY ARE OMG

- HEEEYYY OUR DORM IS GETTING DESTROYED WTF ARE THESE GUYS’ PROBLEM

- We were just talking about renovating it too wtf

- AAAAAHHH HOW DARE YOU— VIL R YOU OK

- Bruh i dont know what is going on but dont touch my man’s face

- They’re targetting Vil and Jamil WHY— overblot men!!??? WHERE ARE YOU— GIVE THEM BACK

- I didnt understand what epel said here lmao BUT—!?

- THEY HAVE GRIM TOO FUCK HE’S BACK LET GO OF MY FUCKING CAT

- WHAT IS GOING ON DARLINGS

- BUDDYY >:’0000 Grimmm MY HEART—

- Are they kidnapping the overblot men?? What— the fucking absolute ｂａｌｌｓ on these robots

- God we’re getting absolutely ｆｕｃｋｅｄ in here

- AND THERE’S A CAULDRON IN THE BACKGROUND LOL DEUCE WENT HAM

- BRING ME BACK MY FUCKING CAT— >:’0000

- I thought there’s going to be a festival not a fucking kidnapping event HEY

- Oh 👀 Rook pls help

- AAAHH SERIOUS ROOK IS HOT—

- IS THE OTHER DORM LEADERS CHILLING WHERE ARE THEY KALIM PLS BE SAFE

- OH RIDDLE IS NOT ANSWERING THEY GOT HIM TOO

- Oh ghad they got him during clubs WTF HOW—

- *nervous hornii chuckling* …angry expression silver 👁👄👁 im sorry

- AAAA Dorm leaders actually be acting like dorm leaders is soo cool i cant—

- Bruh the story is all chaos what is this chapter

- Are they gonna get Leona and Azul too what—

- RIDDLE BABY Jesus christ dont overblot like this again lol

- DAMN HE STRONG FOR A SMOL BOI THO

- Whoever made these robots wtf is their deal lol TO BE ABLE TO BEAT A DORM LEADER—

- …Bruh where is our horned friend when u need him

- Silver and Sebek theorizing with dorm leaders but they took Jamil tho?? It’s probably the overblot men they’re after

- Also Malleus is probably good so you two calm down lol Lilia’s probs having tea with him right now

- Okay, Leona how are you going to get captured KING.

- Omg everything is getting destroyed wtf

- AW LEONA SAVED RUGGIE THATS CUTE AND COOL AF

- Bruh leona these are material robots— cant you just turn them into sand lol

- Oh they do have some kind of brand cmon just turn them into sand pls

- WHAT THE FUCK

- LEONA-SAN!? WHY ARE YOU GIVING UP— OJI-TAN!!!

- OLD MAN WHAT—

- *hearing leona whisper his reasons �� 👁👄👁 🤚 okay sir im sorry

- Damn Leona acting like a real prince right now— it’s kinda hot 👀👀

- BRUH PLS COME BACK DONT TALK LIKE YOU AINT GONNA

- BRO WHERE ARE THE TEACHERS

- THE BOARD GAME CLUB

- Idia : “bro we just chilling be cool— MY CHESS PIECE“

- “Aight ortho what’s the situation” “ｆｕｃｋｅｄ＂

- So Idia of course knows about this— why does he look like he’s so done lmao me getting the feeling this isnt the first time idia has encountered this situation before lol

- Man i want to see azul in action too but mehh— Idia told him to settle down cries

- LOL WHAT IS THIS KARONE ROBOTS

- Wait— are they taking idia too?? OH IS THIS THE DOING OF IDIA’S FAMILY

- WHERE IS CROWLEY— THE TEACHERS, YOUR IMPORTANT STUDENTS ARE GETTING KIDNAPPED

- AH THEY ALSO KNOW ABOUT THESE STYX BITCHES WHAT— and they’re just letting them GO whaaat

- Sounds to me that this must be idia’s family taking care of the overblotting students?? Like to protect Idia or something?? I DONT—

- “Gather all the dorm leaders” No, sir, they’re already gone besides my sunshine and the horn boi

- Malleus??? 👁👄👁 TSUNOTAROU

- Pls kill the robots they destroyed my place

- AAH UPSIDE DOWN LILIA long time no see lol

- Bruhh the diasomnia students are so lucky to have Malleus as a dorm leader omg

- BRUH LILIA’S RINGTONE IS SO CUTE LMAO

- Kalim sounds so desperate im so sad

- ARE WE— ARE WE GONNA MEET MALLEUS AGAINNN

- Bruh they just goku teleported their way out of the dorm lol

- AAAAHH EVERYONE IS HERE THIS IS SO FUN

- Wait jack is not here lol did they just forget about him wtf

- Oh shit we here too i did not know LMAO

- S-So are we just gonna..continue school like— like these styx bitches didnt just ruin half the school, my dorm, injure my bois, and took my cat or…???

- GASP AAAA STYX IS A BLOT RESEARCH FACILITY WHAAAT

- So that’s why leona and idia be like bro this is not worth it

- O-Oh yeah— they…they didnt know that Vil overblot— PFFT

- Malleus pls information who are you talking about—

- WHO— LILIA MALLEUS OH NO

- Ey, overblot squad are assembled lol this looks so dangerous

- LMAOO Riddle was sleeping on Leona’s lap for three hours THATS SO CUTE

- Where the fck did they take them, ITS CRAMPED AF

- Bro they’re just exposing Vil and Jamil’s overblot that’s supposed to be a SECRET LOL

- Oji-tan can sound so wise and reliable like this if he really tried lol sugar daddy energy

- Wtf these guys never thought that idia was from a big shot family??? They thought it was just coincidence that they had the same family name PFFT

- AZUL AAAA He was right there my guy BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY MAN

- oh. They finally opened— isn’t this the ignihyde dorm what

- WHAT THE FU— IDIA

- Bro— WHAT WAS THAT IT WAS IDIA ALL ALONG???

- WHAT IS THIS CHAPTER

This chapter is a fucking roller coaster like— literal 0 to 100 ＱＵＩＣＣ From having a moment with Vil and the bois to a FUCKING TERRORIST ATTACK LMAO IM HYPED FOR NEXT CHAP—

It’s been so long, I hope they released the next part soon (๑>◡<๑) I forgot how fine these men are lol at least I want to hear their voices again 👁👄👁

[holylulusworld]

Shackled

Title: Shackled

Bad Bitches Bingo Square Filled: Enemies to lovers

Written for: @badbitchesbingo​

Summary: Dean is at your mercy and you’ll have some fun.

Pairing: Demon!Dean Winchester x Witch!Reader; Dean Winchester x Witch!Reader

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 2,6 k

Warnings: language, bratty reader, dirty talk, restraints (rope), mentions of spells/binding spells, smut, unprotected sex, face slapping, hate sex, hair pulling, hand around throat (light choking), mentions of anal sex (barely), nipple play, biting, possessive reader/Dean, odd way to cure a demon (but the best way possible), I label this dub-con (just in case), female masturbation, dry humping, fingering, voyeurism

Divider by @firefly-graphics​

2021 Bad Bitches Bingo masterlist

“You know,” you giggle, striding toward the restrained hunter, “I always wondered how’d you taste, Winchester.”

“I’m gonna split you into two halves-“ the demon growls, eyes pitch-black, “with my teeth.” now you snicker, stepping closer to the knight of hell. He still fights to break free, even though he’s retrained to a chair with ropes soaked in holy water. “Come here and get some.”

“Oh-I will, hunter boy,” cooing the words you kick his legs apart to step between his spread thighs, hands cupping his face roughly. “You look so good restrained, helpless and at my mercy. I almost want to make you happy…”

“Fucking witches,” the demon spats, glaring up at you. He hates you don’t even bat an eyelash when he snarls at you. “You don’t want me to be happy.”

“True,” leaning closer to lick over his cheek you smirk as he growls low in his throat. “I want to turn you into a mess, Dean Winchester. You know,” glancing over your shoulder you smirk, “your brother believes I want to help him cure you but little me wants to toy with you.”

“Toy with me,” eyes angry black holes Dean watches you straddle one of his thighs. You grip his shoulders, still that smirk on your lips when you start to rub your aching core over his thigh. “Bitch! You won’t get off using me.”

“Oh-I fucking will, Deano-“ you roughly grip his chin, force your tongue down his throat. “And you’ll thank me when I’m done, demon. I will make you scream so loud your baby brother can hear every moan and gasp.”

“Get off me,” Dean growls, a little less disgusted by you. “I will rip you apart, witch. This is your last-“ he moans feeling your hand cup his growing erection. “Fuck-“

“I’m on it, demon,” kissing him greedily, your tongue in his mouth you ignore Dean fights the ropes holding him. “You know, I never fucked a hunter nor a demon. This is the perfect opportunity. Plus, we hate each other. Three things I can cross off my bucket list.”

“Your life must be lame,” Dean huffs when you hop off his thigh to get rid of your skirt and shirt, revealing you are wearing no underwear. “What if my beloved brother walks in on us?”

“Aw, are you shy, Deano?” grinning you snap your fingers, sealing the dungeon so no one can enter it. “He’s out cold, sleeps like a baby just like the angel. I will have my fun with you and later,” you turn around to bend over a little, shaking your ass to show Dean the tattoo on your left cheek, “I’ll give you a nice new tattoo.”

“What’s that? A little devil?” he cocks his head, eagerly ogling your exposed sex. “Fuck me, she’s dripping. Such a naughty girl.”

“Yep,” turning back around to stalk toward the demon you snicker. “If I get the tattoo on your chest, you’ll be bound to me, Dean. There is no way you can deny me any wish. And now I wish for your dick in my cunt.”

“Greedy slut,” spatting the words Dean must watch you unbuckle his belt. He growls, fighting the ropes but somehow, his cock swells in his pants. “I’m gonna fucking ruin this greedy pussy.”

“I hope so,” you coo, unzipping his pants, dragging the rough fabric down his thighs with one swift motion. “Perfect dick for an asshole like you.” lazily licking your lips, you rip Dean’s red shirt open, smirking as he gasps at the sudden movement. “I want you free of clothing, demon boy. I like my prey naked.”

“Kinky rotten cunt,” Dean growls when you snap your fingers to destroy his undershirt, revealing his chest to him. “Don’t touch me.” he growls but his eyes are glued to your hand creep toward his cock. “I dare—fuck me.” 

“Not yet, baby,” you purr, moving your hand slowly up and down his cock, driving him crazy. “Just tell me you want it and you can feel me wrapped around your dick, if not-“ you release his cock, stepping away to sit on the floor.

“What? Do you want to just stare at my dick till you get off?”

“No-“ you spread your legs, reveal your dripping sex to the demon. “I will just get me myself off using my talent fingers.” that caught his attention. His eyes glued to your tongue wetting your fingers the demon fights the ropes.

“Get here on my dick, bitch. You got me hard,” he grunts, gritting his teeth when you start to slide your fingers through your folds, “now take care of me.”

“I didn’t hear a ‘please’ Dean,” shoving two fingers into your cunt you moan loudly. “Feels so good, baby. I’m so, so wet for you, and tight.”

“I-I want you to ride my dick,” panting heavily, his eyes glued to your fingers fucking your slick cunt the demon growls like a wild animal. “I dare you to keep me waiting.”

“I want to hear it,” moving your fingers faster you lock eyes with the demon. “If I cum, before you beg me, you won’t cum at all.”

“P-Please-“ he spats, eyes onyx orbs. “Come here and fuck me or I’ll rip your throat out with my teeth. 

“If you ask so nicely…”

“Do you think Y/N can end the cure?” looking at Castiel, wondering why the angel frowns deeply Sam looks at the lore again. “She’s sure about this spell? We didn’t use that one with Crowley.”

“Trust me,” Castiel assures. “If anyone can master this spell, it’s Y/N. She’s a bit difficult but deep down inside she’s a good person.”

“If you say so…”

“Bitch,” Dean tries to inhale your scent when you straddle his lap. He fights the ropes again, dreams of wrapping his hand around your throat, and fuck you raw. “Get started or I’ll-“

“Kill me,” you smirk, raising your hips to line his cock up with your dripping core. “Nah, I think you’ll take my pussy and cum when I tell you to,” pushing your tits in his face you grunt, “lips around my nipple, suck it like a good boy.”

“Fuck you, bitch,” a slap silences Dean and you sink onto without warning. He hisses, growls low in his throat before you silence him with your tits in his face again. 

“You know the drill, Winchester. Give me what I want,” you gyrate your hips, force a deep guttural growl out of Dean’s throat, “and I’ll fuck you like no slut before me.”

“You’re the only slut I fucked so far,” he husks, plump lips curled into a smirk. “Now get started bitch, or I’ll bite your nipple.”

“Do it,” you whimper, watching Dean wrap his lips around one nipple, crazing it with his teeth. He smirks against your plush flesh before he bites down your tit and you grip his shoulders, crying out. “Fuck, you’re a beast.”

“I’m a monster and you just sank down my dick. I hope you didn’t get into trouble, sweetheart,” he grins, thrusting upward to hit that spot making you see stars. “There it is bitch. Now ride me as you mean it.”

“Fucking shut your mouth,” fisting his hair you force Dean to crane his neck. “Look at me while I fuck you, demon.”

“The moment I get out of these ropes, this cunt is mine, your ass is mine, your body and soul are going to be mine. And I’ll ruin you. Every. Single. Hole,” the demon threatens, licking his lips when you start to move your hips. “Good girl.”

“Shut up,” you tug harder, force another growl out of his throat. “Just take it like a good boy.” You grin, feeling his chest heave up and down against your breasts. “I bet you’d like to push me to the ground and just fuck me raw from behind like a wild dog.”

“Feral wolf, sweetheart,” you ignore Dean throws insults at you or that you’ve got the feeling he’s too comfortable with you on top of him. All you have in mind is to fuck him into obedience. “There, faster, harder. Make yourself cum on my cock, slut. I want you to cream all over me.” Your hips begin to stutter, and you hate yourself for it but you grip his shoulders to bounce faster on his cock. 

“FUCK-I-M-“ you dig your nails into his shoulders, moaning loudly when your orgasm ripples through your body. You close your eyes, and for a moment, you allow yourself to let your guard down only to feel Dean’s hands paw at your ass.

“Yeah, and you will for the rest of the night-“ the demon smirks when you snap your eyes open. “Game over, witch. Now you will be good and do anything I want.” He grins, revealing pearl white teeth. “This includes taking my cock like a good girl.”

You shiver as his rough hands guide you up and down his cock. “Look at you, pathetic slut. Impaled on a demon’s cock you’re nothing but a drooling bitch in heat. Now I’m gonna fuck you as you deserve it.”

“OH GOD!” you cry, fighting his hands when he stands to throw you onto the ground. “Dean…”

“Aw, just stay there and take it, baby girl. I don’t bite,” he grins, rolling his shoulders. “Well, maybe a little…”

“Did Y/N just scream?” worriedly looking at the dungeon Sam debates to help you or to listen to his friend.

“Sam, she said we shall not enter the dungeon before she leaves it. And we can’t. She sealed it with a spell.”

“I’m just worried if she tried to keep us out or Dean inside…”

“Such a bad girl,” Dean pushes you to the ground, face pressed into the cold concrete. “I should snap your neck and just leave but I will cream this pussy first.” you moan at his threat, already dripping for more.

“Do your worst,” you whimper. “I can take it.”

“I know you can,” he wraps one large palm around your throat, forces you on your hands. “And you will take me so deep it hurts. Pity I don’t give a shit if you like it or not.”

“Fuck me like a man or leave it,” you quip. “If you can’t get hard, ask your brother for advice. He made me cum so hard last time we had a quickie.”

“You’re mine to fuck,” he grips you by your hips, driving in balls deep without warning. “Fuck, that’s a good pussy.” you writhe on his cock, moaning shamelessly as he starts to hammer into you.

“Hurry up, I got an appointment for cardio training later,” Dean chuckles darkly. “I mean it, Winchester.”

“The only valid form of cardio is taking my dick, Y/N. Now shut your mouth or I’ll gag you with my fist,” he speeds up, arms wrapping tightly around your chest to bring your back against his body. “Your pussy just saved your life.” he whispers in your ear, rutting harder into you.

“Blood to blood, mind to mind,” you chant, crying out the last word when Dean wraps one hand around your throat again. “Soul to soul, bind us. His Darkness, come to me. Let my light swallow it.” 

“What the fuck?” Dean roars through his orgasm, shudders when blinding light surrounds you and the demon inside your body. 

“Chain to chain, bind our souls. His Darkness be mine. My light be his,” you fall back against Dean’s chest, chanting the last words of your spell. “Let my heart save his…”

Dean pulls out of you, breaks apart, warily watching you. He breathes hard, not understanding why he can’t stop looking at you.

“Darkness fade away, set his soul free and take mine,” you end the spell, ripping your necklace off your neck to throw it at Dean.

The demon screams in agony, falls to the ground, clutching his chest. “It’s done, no turning back, Winchester,” you sigh, losing consciousness.

“How could you let her do this?” looking at you snuggled in his pillow Dean huffs. “You let a fucking witch bind me to her?”

“She said it’s the only way to end the cure. We were—desperate,” Sam chokes out. “Purified blood and the spell didn’t work.”

“Why did she have to do it that way?” licking his lips, Dean remembers the way you came around him. 

“She purified your soul and shares the burden of the mark with you until we can remove it,” Castiel explains. “We reached the end of the rope Dean. Be thankful. Y/N was the only one agreeing to help you.”

“That woman is a witch!” Dean groans, when you roll to his favorite side on the bed, giggling when he glares at you.

“Aw, that hurts my feelings, hunter,” you mutter, blinking your eyes open. “I assume the cure worked?”

“He’s human again and pissed,” Sam throws his hands up in surrender. “I’m going to get drunk tonight. Leave me out of this fight.”

“I’ll leave you alone to talk things out,” Castiel ushers out of the room, sighing as Dean slams the door shut behind him.

“You got them wrapped around your finger, but I don’t trust you one bit,” he pokes your thigh. “Get off my bed and out of the bunker.”

“No thank you for your help?” you sit up, grinning at Dean. “Or rather for the fuck?”

“This stays between you and me,” he’s in your face, breathing heavily. “I dare you to tell Sam we fucked.”

“I’m the kiss and not tell kind of girl, Winchester. And—it was a pitiful and disappointing encounter. Why would I tell anyone about the worst sex I ever had?” you fake a deep sigh, batting your eyelashes.

“You are so frustrating.”

“And sexy,” you coo, kneeling on the bed. “Did you already see the great new tattoo on your chest? This means you are mine from now on.”

“A fucking chain,” Dean mutters, watching you pat his cock. “What are you up to? Why did you help me?”

“You’re a source of pure darkness and this gets me all tingly,” purring the words you slide your hand up to his chest to fist his shirt. “I’m the only one controlling it. If you want to stay human, you better satisfy my needs.”

“Your needs,” Dean huffs, but his cock twitches in interest. “Dream on.”

“I only want to get dicked down good and hard once in a while. Oh! And I want you to help me cross things off my bucket list. I already got hate sex, sex with a demon, sex with a hunter, and sex with Dean Winchester.”

“You’re a freak…a kinky one,” husking the words Dean unbuckles his belt…slowly. “What else do you have on that list?” he cocks a brow, smirking as you already unbutton the shirt you stole from him. “Y/N, I asked you a question.”

“Let’s see-“ cocking your head you try to remember all the things on your list. “Sex with you on your car. Eating pie off someone’s body. Killing the coven who killed my family. Sex with Sam Winchester. Sex with both Winchesters. Learning how to play a piano.”

“Holy fuck!” Dean growls, freeing his aching cock. “You are a fucking slut for Winchester cocks.”

“And?” you shrug, eyes glued to Dean’s cock. “I get bored easily on hunts and let my mind drift toward a good dick-story.” 

“Get on hands and knees, bitch,” Dean orders. “You’ll recite your bucket list while I fuck you raw. And no, you won’t get Sammy’s dick, only mine. Now hands behind your back, I got a nice rope waiting to tame you.”

“I prefer your dick…”

Tags in reblog.

[jayeeintheclouds-inactive]

not to be nsfw on main but

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things

work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All

right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for

that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not?

- It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane!

You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label

on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so

difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer,

have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta

weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke

machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the

last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. - Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. - Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I'm the pea. - The pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic... ...without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security. - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Oaptain, I'm in a real situation. - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species... What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! - Is that another bee joke? - No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. - Who's that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble.

We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. - What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flower. - I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we're not done yet. Listen,

everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

[ultralovedeluxe]

Yandere! Josuke with prompts #5 and #69

Hey everyone! This was requested by @mochimizuki121. I apologize for this taking so long, I’ve never written for Josuke and I think he came out a bit ooc, I hope this came out nicely though. Requests are still open!

‘Just what do you think you’re doing? Put that phone down!’

‘They thought they could tear us apart, so I had to put a stop to them!’

Warnings: 18 year old Josuke, female reader, yandere behaviors, mentions of violence?, non/dub con, nsfw towards the end.

  Cherry blossoms are meant to symbolize good fortune and represent love. Love should be the primary emotion you should feel when under a cherry blossom tree. So when you asked Josuke to meet you under a cherry blossom tree near the school, Josuke was ecstatic. Why else would his lovely, little girlfriend ask him to meet under a cherry blossom tree? To Josuke, these meanings had to be true. He was a firm believer.

 You, however, not so much.

 In fact, cherry blossoms have a double meaning. Cherry blossoms also represent death or the end of something. And sadly, this was the only meaning accurate to you.

 “So [first]-chan, why did you invite me here? Is it something important?” Josuke could hardly contain his excitement, it had to be great. Was he finally going to meet your parents? Were you both going on a date together? Were you finally going to let him-

 “Josuke, I’m glad you came, and yes it is very important..” you said trying not to just yell at your pompadour-haired boyfriend. His puppy-dog expression was starting to get to you, and in all realness, making this a lot harder than it was supposed to be. 

 “So, what is it babe? C’mon you can’t keep me waiting, I want to know!”

 You grit your teeth, god this really is going to be hard. You almost feel nauseous in doing so. You are going to wound his boyish pride so bad right now, but you know it’s for the best, hell it was for your well-being.

 “Please just listen to me Josuke. I..I want to break up” you said, trying not to mumble any words; you wanted him to hear you loud and clear, even though to some extent it hurt you too. It just had to be done. You couldn’t be in this relationship anymore. 

 Josuke wanted to believe that you said something else, you HAD to have said something else. You didn’t want to break up with him, you were just confused right? No..he swore he’d done everything right. He was a good boyfriend, he asked his mom for advice, he asked Jotaro for advice, where or what did he do wrong? Josuke tried hard to let his lip wobble at the news, let alone cry.

 “Was it something I did? Please tell me, is it because I’m overbearing? I promise I’ll try my best to be better! I-I’ll get rid of my video games if I have to, please [first] don’t leave me-” Josuke pleaded with you, but you couldn’t have this conversation much longer. “I’m sorry Josuke, we can still be friends..I just can’t be with you anymore, I hope you understand” you said walking away from the tree and Josuke. It hurt, but you knew this was the right descion. At the moment though, you didn’t want to face the male; you wanted to avoid him as much as possible.

 Josuke however, felt devastated, betrayed almost. How could you have ended your relationship you had? He had been a good boyfriend right? Did you find someone else? No, you couldn’t have, you loved him, you were just getting confused at the moment. You must be getting brainwashed or something. He felt Crazy Diamond manifest behind him, and he gripped his fist.  He will get to the bottom of this. He will find out who gave you the idea that he was a bad partner. You just don’t understand how much he loves you. ‘No, please don’t leave me [first]’

-

 “So did you do it?”

 You looked over to your classmate, Rikka asked almost desperately. “Of course I did, but I still feel awful about it..Is- Is it true that he’s a thug?” you mumbled sensing a feeling of dread just thinking about it. You loved Josuke, but if what your friend was saying was true, you couldn’t possibly stay with him much longer. In fact, Rikka wasn’t the only girl who warned you about Josuke. “Come on [first]-chan, haven’t you noticed the way he dresses? Only delinquents dress like that. Not to mention the hair” she told you, mumbling the final part (since it’s known that Josuke hates when people insult his hair). You shook your head, “Thank you so much for telling me Rikka-chan, I don’t know what I’ve done if my parents caught me dating a thug. But..I really did love Josuke..”

 Rikka gave you an an assertive smile, “Don’t worry [first], there’s other guys here in school. I’m sure there’s at least two who have a thing for you, you’ll get over Higashikata-san eventually, now come on it’s almost time for class” she said picking up her bag and walking towards the lockers. You smiled and nodded in response. “I’ll meet you there just let me get my pen, I left it in my purse” you said walking towards her. “You’re always so forgetful!” Rikka joked.

 Not far from the lockers, Josuke was standing there, listening to every word that came from your mouth. “Oi Okuyasu, what’s that girl’s name?” Josuke asked his fellow stand user and friend. “That’s Minamino Rikka, I think I have a few classes with her. She’s kinda cute no?” Okuyasu said walking back to the classroom they were in. ‘Not as cute as my [first]-chan’ Josuke thought as he tried to contain his anger. He wasn’t completely mad at you, he was more mad at that ‘Rikka’ for getting those sick thoughts into your head. He wasn’t a ‘thug’, he was a good guy! In fact he was the perfect boyfriend for you. He was sure you knew it too, you were just getting fed lies. Maybe he’d have to teach that girl a lesson for messing with his darling..

-

 “I heard you dumped Josuke, he’s a drag huh. You should go out with a real man. So how about it [first]-chan? Wanna go on a date with me?”

 You knew who this was. This was Fungami Yuya, he wasn’t exactly a heartthrob, but he did have his fair share of fans. However, you knew he wasn’t good news, despite how charming he looked. You had heard from Josuke that he was a motorcycle gang member, right off the bat you have to refuse. “I’m sorry Yuya, we don’t know each other very well, and besides-” you tried to just waltz your way out of the situation, but Yuya persisted. “Please [first]-chan, give me a chance, I genuinely want to ask you to-” 

 “What the hell are you doing near my girlfriend?!”

 You looked back at the entrance of the classroom to see Josuke, already fuming with anger. You never liked it when Josuke got angry, you always felt like whoever the person he was getting angry at was in complete danger. Not to mention you always feel like there’s another presence in the room when he does get angry. “Josuke please!-”

 Soon, the space between Josuke and Yuya got smaller, “Are you asking for a fight? What gives you the right to talk to my girlfriend that way? She’s taken. Plus where are your groupies anyway?” Josuke asked, but at this point, he was close to just beat him up with Crazy Diamond.

 “I’ll handle this doll-” Yuya muttered to you while placing a quick kiss on your forehead, before going back to facing Josuke. “Josuke, what’s the deal? You two aren’t together anymore, everyone knows it-”

 “Don’t let history repeat itself Yuya. You know what I can do to you. You wouldn’t want to go back to the hospital again would you?” by that point, Crazy Diamond had already manifested itself behind Josuke, and it’s glare was quite terryfying. Yuya gulped at the sight of the other stand, before leaving the classroom you were in. You wanted to leave the room as well, but before you could even get up from your seat on your own terms, Josuke had already dragged you across the hall.

 “Josuke! Let me go! You’re hurting me! I thought we weren’t together anymore!” you squeeled trying to get someone’s attention. It didn’t seem like anyone would hear you though, because Josuke had shoved you into one of the unused bathroom stalls. “Shut your whore mouth. We are together, you didn’t mean to break up with me right? It was just that people kept lying to you about me..” he said in a rather harsh tone before quieting down. Truth be told, you were scared. This wasn’t the Josuke you fell in love with. “I don’t.. I-you hurt me [first]. When you broke up with me, I was heartbroken. But when I found out that Rikka and those other girls were feeding you lies, I knew I had to protect you. They tried to tear us apart, so I put a stop to them” Josuke said holding you in place.

 “What the hell are you talking about? What did you do to them?” actually, you didn’t want to find out. Right now you had to get away from Josuke. You kicked him below the belt and ran from the bathroom. You didn’t even know where you were running to, as long as it was away from Josuke, you felt safe. You locked yourself in a gym closet, you just had to buy some time. There was only a few more minutes before school ended, you just had to be patient. You pulled out your cellphone and tried to dial your mother’s phone number.

 “Just what do you think you’re doing? Put that phone down now! Now you’re seriously going to get it” you heard Josuke right across from you. How did he find you so quickly? You were sure you had locked the door. It doesn’t matter now because your phone was snatched from your hands by none other than your ex-boyfriend. Although you knew it was useless, you tried to crawl away because panic and fear ran thorough your mind. 

 “Why are you trying to run away from me [first], I’m just doing this because I love you so much. How about I show you how much I love you” Josuke said holding you by the hips, getting you closer to him. You tried to release yourself from his grasp, “No! Josuke please I don’t want this! I don’t want this relationship! Please!” you tried to reason with him. but it seems you made him even more angrier. “I really wanted you to enjoy this, but I guess you want a punishment instead..” he growled making you face him. This really wasn’t the Josuke you once loved, this was a monster.  He then used Crazy Diamond to rip open your clothes..

-

 Loud moans and gasps filled the small closet you and Josuke where in. You were fully naked, while he had his pants down. Josuke left red marks on your hips from where his nails kept digging into your skin. You felt drool drip down your mouth as Josuke kept thrusting into you at a inhuman speed. “You see..this is why you shouldn’t try to break up with me. I know you still love me. You won’t ever leave me after this” Josuke groaned into your ear while kissing your neck roughly. You only moaned in response, you felt like if he didn’t stop now, you were going to pass out. You wanted to hate him, oh how desperately you wanted to hate him. However, there was no denying how good he’s making you feel. “Josuke..please I’m close” you gasped as you clinged onto him. “Yes! Yes [first] let it all out! Let me know how good I made you feel!” He said, his thrusts getting more sloppy and impatient. 

 Not even a few moments after, you climaxed, with Josuke following soon after. You were gently placed on the floor by none other than Josuke. You were completely exhausted, you just wanted to go home. “You were amazing [first], I hope you remember this moment. Don’t ever run from me okay?” he said laying next to you. He placed one final kiss on your lips.

“I love you..”

[thesightstoshowyou]

Slip Stitch

Thomas Hewitt x F Reader (NSFW)

Read Part 1 here

Summary: You sew Tommy up after an altercation. Then, you help him with his other problem. (This fic is a strange mix of sticky sweet and horribly violent. This one got away from me. I’m very soft for this man)

Warnings: Blood, gore, violence, death of minor character, oral, mirror sex, praise kink.

 ~~

             “TOMMY! GET OUT HERE!”

             You jerk awake, sitting bolt upright in bed. You’re dazed, wondering where you are until you hear Hoyt shouting outside and Tommy’s thundering footsteps as he descends the stairs. Then comes that horrible noise, the revving, the deafening roar of a chainsaw rumbling to life.

            You scream and clap your hands over your ears, pulling your knees to your chest and burying your face in them. It does little to help. The agonized screaming reaches you anyway. You hear them dying, whoever they are, their screams cut short. The chainsaw idles.

            Your doorhandle rattles and you startle. The lock clicks. A wild-eyed young man bursts into your room. There’s blood splattered across his shirt, terrible crimson dripping onto the floor as he moves. He slams the door shut and blocks it with his body. He spots you on the bed, takes in your tear streaked face, your normal clothes, the horror in your eyes.

            “We gotta get out of here. C’mon!” He assumes you’re a victim, like him. Well, he’s mostly right. He crosses the room and grabs your arm, tries pulling you to your feet. He’s wants to help you.

            “No, no, stop! You don’t understand, you have to get out of here—

            “C’mon, let me help you, c’mon!” he murmurs, keeping his shaky voice as muted as he can. You try and wrench your arm out of his grip, try to get through to him but he’s too frightened, too agitated. He’s not hearing you.

            “STOP, you need to run! You have to RUN!” you scream at him, but he’s not listening. He’s looking behind his shoulder, mumbling “out of here, out of here” over and over, tugging at your arm. He’s traumatized, out of his mind with fear. His nails are biting into your arm he’s gripping you so tightly.

            Suddenly, the door is kicked open with so much force it splinters, one of the hinges flying off the door frame to skitter across the floor. Thomas takes up the entire doorway, chest heaving, murderous intent in his eyes. You’ve never seen him so angry. He radiates it, makes you shrink back onto the bed and cower.

             Thomas grabs the boy’s arm, jerking him away from you so hard you hear the pop of his shoulder dislocating from its socket. He screams in pain and dread as Thomas hurls him down the hall. They disappear from view and you’re glad for it when the chainsaw growls.

            There’s screaming, then there isn’t.

            The chainsaw splutters and goes quiet. You hear Tommy panting, then his heavy footfalls as he hurries down the hall and into your room. He kneels at the edge of your bed, gently pulling you toward him. He inspects your arm where the boy had held you, turning it this way and that in his huge hands.

            You stare blankly at the blood and flesh coating the entire front of him. It takes you a moment to realize he’s looking at you questioningly. You meet his concerned gaze and force a thin smile across your face.

            “I’m okay, Tommy. I’m okay.” You reach out to grip his shoulder reassuringly but quickly withdraw your hand when he flinches.

            “Oh no, you’re hurt,” you say, slipping off the bed to inspect the wound. This is good, good for you anyway. It gives you something else to concentrate on, something to occupy your mind instead of the horror that just took place a few feet from where you sleep. Tommy shakes his head, standing and gently brushing you off.

            “No, you can work later. This will get infected. It needs stitches.” You take his hand and lead him from the room. Careful not to look too closely at the mangled body and gore splashed across the walls, you lead Thomas to the bathroom and push him down so he’s seated on the edge of the tub.

            “You’ll have to take your shirt off.” He stares at you for a moment, frowning. You raise your eyebrows at him and he sighs, loosening his tie and unbuttoning his shirt. You help him slide the fabric off his injured shoulder. Blood leaks from the deep slash, thick rivulets that pour down his bicep and forearm to drip into the bathtub.

            You slap a washrag over the wound, holding pressure while you get the water in the tub running. Testing it, you find it warm enough. You soak the cloth, lathering it with soap before gently scrubbing away the dried blood and grime around Tommy’s wound. He tenses but says nothing, stoic as always.

            Once you deem it clean enough, you retrieve the sewing kit from under the sink. You choose the thinnest curved needle, feeling sorry for Tommy as you do. As you thread the needle, you recall the conversation you’d had with Luda Mae on your first day at the Hewitt residence:

             “I can cook. I can clean, and sew.” You plead your case, praying this insane family will choose to keep you alive. You wish Tommy would put you down. He still clutches you to his chest like you’ll float away if he lets go. Luda Mae scoffs.

            “Sew. Tommy can sew.” She frowns, looking between you to her son. She sighs, shoulders slumping in defeat and adds, “But it might do to have another cook ‘round here.”

             Guess your sewing skills are going to come in handy after all.

            “Sorry, Tommy. Let me know if you need me to stop, okay?” Thomas nods and grips the edge of the tub. He watches, brow furrowing, as you push the needle through his skin, pulling the thread until it’s red with his blood. You use a slip stitch, hoping to minimize the scarring.

            It’s almost easy to see him as a different person like this, passive and calm, watching intently as your fingers push the needle through his flesh. Like this, he isn’t the frightening chainsaw-wielding cannibal. Like this, he’s just Tommy. Tommy, who so tenderly held your face down in the cellar and cradled you to his chest like he would protect you from anything that would ever think of hurting you.

            It's easy to imagine, so you do. You imagine are together somewhere else, somewhere far away from this awful house. You imagine Tommy is just that: Tommy, not Thomas Brown Hewitt. You imagine you’re just helping Tommy mend an injury he acquired while working in the yard.

            Thomas flinches under your fingers, reaching up with his uninjured arm to grip the edge of your shirt. You’re sure it’s an unconscious action on his part. He hasn’t tried to touch you again since that first time. He’s kept his distance for the five months you’ve been imprisoned here. You wonder if it’s insecurity, or fear, or something else entirely. Thomas treats you like a porcelain doll, like you’ll crumble apart in his hands if he’s not careful enough. He must be afraid of hurting you.

            But he hadn’t hurt you. Oh no, quite the opposite. You’re loath to admit it, but there have been nights where you’ve awoken, drenched in sweat and slick between your thighs, high off dreams of Tommy taking you in the cellar. There are times you’ve burned with need and wished he would burst into your room to claim you again.

            You’re pulled from your reverie as you reach the edge of Tommy’s wound. You tug, knitting his flesh together and tie off the thread. Rinsing away the rest of the blood, you cover the wound with gauze and tape it to his skin.

            Thomas moves to get up but you push him back down. He looks up at you quizzically. You smile softly, taking the wash cloth and gently cleaning the sweat and blood from his forehead. He stiffens, eyes falling to his knees, then flicking to the door, looking anywhere but at your face.

            You comb your fingers through his hair, as much as you can while hindered by the strap of his mask. You still haven’t seen what’s underneath. You wonder if you ever will.

            Tommy’s eyes slip closed as you scratch your nails against his scalp. You move to his temples, rubbing gentle circles into his skin. Warmth blooms in your chest when you see his shoulders relax.

            You move to stand between his spread thighs, a better angle to work your fingers into his neck and shoulders. Thomas sighs, leaning forward to rest his head against your chest as you dig your knuckles into the stiff muscles between his shoulder blades. He flexes briefly before relaxing, and you’re momentarily transfixed by the way his defined back muscles ripple under his skin.

            You card your fingers through the damp hair on the back of his neck and Tommy groans quietly. You bite your lip, face heating up. He sounds like he did that day in the basement.

            He must feel you tense because he leans back to meet your gaze, searching your face. You stare into his deep eyes, full of adoration and a little smile tugs at the corners of you mouth. Only a monster could be unmoved by the way he looks at you.

            Then, your eyes trail lower and you notice the other effect your ministrations are having. You swallow thickly. Christ, you’re nearly drooling at just the sight of his clothed cock straining against his trousers. Too easy.

            Tommy notices you staring. You see the skin above his mask flush crimson and his eyes shift away from yours, ashamed. You suppress another grin, amused by how little effort it takes to make this powerful man squirm.

            You move to your knees, kneeling between his legs and leisurely sliding your hands up the inside of his thighs. Thomas inhales sharply, nails digging into the edge of the tub. He sits up as straight as a board and you briefly wonder if all your work kneading his muscles has gone to waste.

            “Is this okay, Tommy?” you whisper, maintaining eye contact and leaning forward to press a soft kiss to the inside of his knee. Thomas nods quickly, too quickly. You stifle a giggle, fingers moving to his belt.

            Clink, pop, zip, rustle and there he is, heated flesh hard and flushed in your palm. You give him one slow stroke before scooting forward to drag your tongue up the thick vein along the underside. The scent of him hits your nose, spicy sweat and sharp soap.

            Thomas utters a strained whine, the sound going straight to your lower belly. You clench your thighs together and wrap your lips around the tip of his cock. You’re determined to pull more needy sounds from him.

            There’s no way to fit him all in your mouth, so instead you suckle on the tip, tasting salty tang on your tongue, and work your hands up and down his shaft. Tommy groans again, one hand leaving the edge of the tub to rest on the back of your neck.

            You hum in your throat as you hollow out your cheeks, looking up through your lashes to meet Thomas’ heated stare. He jerks, fisting a hand in your hair and hastily pulling you off his twitching cock. He gasps, the fingers in your hair trembling.

            You flash him a coy smile and bite your lip and you think he’s probably had enough of your teasing when he abruptly stands, pulling you with him and backing you up until you bump the edge of the sink. Fear sneaks up on you then, with Thomas towering over you, looking down at you with unbridled lust.

            His deft fingers find the button on your shorts, working them open and bunching the fabric in his hands, preparing to yank them off your hips. He seems to remember himself then, freezing and looking down at you, the question of consent in his eyes. There he is, your sweet Tommy.

            You place your own hands over his, wiggling your hips and working the shorts down your thighs. They only make it to your knees before Thomas is twisting you around and grabbing handfuls of your hips before grinding his cock against the flesh of your ass, groaning through his teeth. He’s desperate, that sound sending a jolt of arousal through your heated core. Your heart hammers in your chest, anxiety and excitement fighting for dominance in your mind.

            You bend over the sink and raise your hips so his cock brushes against your drooling slit. Reaching behind you, you grip his hot length, grinding down against the smooth skin to coat it in slick before bringing him to your entrance.

            You release him when he begins to push into your eager cunt, gripping the sink and breathing through your nose to keep yourself as relaxed as you can. Holy hell, you’d forgotten how big he is…. Gradually, Tommy advances, parting tight, slippery muscles until his hips meet the flesh of your ass.

            “Ohh my god, fuck,” you murmur, huffing breaths making the hair that has fallen in front of your mouth billow. Thomas reaches for your neck, gently gripping you under the jaw with one massive hand and tilting your head up so he can see your face in the mirror.

            Experimentally, keeping a close eye on your expression, he bucks his hips and you cry out, one hand gripping him around the wrist. You dig your teeth into your lip, afraid the others in the house will hear. He does it again and your eyes snap shut, a strangled moan ripping from your throat.

            Thomas starts up a steady pace, rocking into you and using the hand on your jaw to pull you back onto his cock. He’s more controlled this time, but you can feel his restraint slipping in the way his thick fingers twitch against your neck. He pants and you whimper, each thrust of that monstrous cock sending electric shocks of pleasure arcing through you.

            “Tommy, oh fuck, Tommy, yes, just like that, that’s so good, you’re so good—

            You’re babbling, hardly aware of the praise tumbling from your lips. Thomas moans noisily, his thrusts growing more uncoordinated and rougher the more you speak. Soon the vanity is thump, thumping against the wall with each slam of his hips, but you’re past the point of caring.

            Wonderful, liquid heat curls in your gut. You’re practically leaking around the cock stuffed inside you, can feel it spilling down your thighs to drip onto the floor. The edge is right there, a few thrusts away.

            “Yes, Tommy, please don’t stop, please, please, I’m gonna cum, you’re gonna make me cum—

            He’s first to the finish line this time, groaning low in his chest and pushing into you as deep as he can to paint your insides. The feel of his cock twitching against your clenching muscles sends you soaring out over the edge, your eyes snapping shut, hot pleasure roiling within you.

             You recover first, cracking your eyes open and taking in Tommy’s wrecked expression in the mirror. His eyes are closed tight and his chest heaves, shoulders hunched and quivering. You’re mesmerized by his arms and chest, defined muscles on display and covered in a thin sheen of sweat.

             Gently, you ease yourself away, your dewy skin sticking you to one another. Tommy hisses when he slips out of you, a deluge of seed pouring from your creamy cunt to coat your already slick thighs. What a mess he makes of you.

             Turning to face him, you catch him off guard when you pop up on your tip toes to plant a kiss to the mouth of his mask. Thomas blinks when you pull away, eyes wide in surprise, but he recovers quickly, more than happy to slip his fingers under your ears and pull you in until your lips touch his through the slit in his mask.

             “I think I need a shower,” you giggle against his mouth. You feel his lips curl into a grin and you smile back, adding “Want to join me?”

[damn-stark]

Lightning

Thor Odinson x Odinsdottir!reader, Loki Laufeyson x Odinsdottir!reader (platonic)

Summary: After the death of your brother Loki, and Frigga, things in Asgard change drastically, just like your father. Where he was once cold and distant before, now he’s caring and attentive. And you didn’t mind his change, in fact you loved that he had this new time for you, yet when you find out the truth behind his actions, how will you react?

Warning- Fluff, slight angst

———-

“This is stupid.” You groan as you kick the mirror back and fall back in your seat.

“What did that poor mirror do to you?”

At the sound of your fathers voice you throw your head up and turn to see him standing by your doorway. It was a surprise for sure, but you knew how to react by his sudden appearance.

You stand up and straighten out your shoulders, offering him a small smile. “Father.”

Said man walks into your room and picks up your mirror, standing beside it and keeping his attention on you. “What’s wrong?”

“I,” you blink, keeping your gaze on him for a brief second and silently questioning his behavior before sitting back down and refocusing on your appearance. “I can’t do my braid, it’s hard,” you sigh, feeling your smile fall, “without mother here I can’t seem to do it. I also don’t like when the handmaidens touch my hair, and Thor isn’t here to help, and Loki...is gone too. So I can’t do my braid.”

“I can help you.” Your father suddenly offers.

“Are you sure?” You ask unsurely, watching as he made his way behind you. “Aren’t you busy?”

“I can make some time,” he says as he begins to braid your hair, peeking your curiosity even more.

You don’t question it, you find it odd that he’s been so attentive lately, so involved with your days, but again, you don’t want to question it. You actually like receiving his attention. It was a good change.

“Father, do you know when Thor will be returning?”

Through his reflection from the mirror in front of you, you see him shrug and briefly lift his gaze to look at you before focusing back on your hair. “No, it seems after the dark elves attacked he hardly tells me anything. Why bored of me already?”

You narrow your gaze on his reflection, but you dont think to get too deep into what was going on. “No, it’s just I find myself bored most of the day after school, and well after mother and Loki died he always tried to make time to do something with me.”

“Do you miss Loki?”

“Yes,” you answer without hesitation.

“Even after all he did? All the terrible things he’s caused?”

You sigh and look down at your hands and create sparks of lightning between your fingers. “Loki was always nice to me, he never did the things to me that he did to, Thor. Plus, mother always said never to think of him badly,” you pause and close your fist, feeling your eyes sting with tears whilst going unaware of your “fathers” stunned pause after your comment. “So, yes I miss my brother.”

Your father clears his throat and goes back to finishing your braid in silence, patting your shoulder to signal you that he was done. When you stand up and lift your gaze to examine the braid, you gasp and feel those salty tears you withheld roll down your cheeks.

“What? Did it come out wrong?” Your father queries.

You reach for your braid and gently run your fingers down it, responding in an almost breathless manner. “It’s how Loki would braid my hair.” You turn around to face your father and you offer him a short, sweet smile. “Thank you, father.” You move to your desk and grab your things to go to class, stopping at your doorway and looking over your shoulder. “I’m going to go to class now, I’ll see you at dinner.”

Just as you turn to leave, he stops you. “Wait. Do you want to skip class today and do something else?”

“Uh,” you part your lips, spinning on your heels to face him still in your room. “But you always say learning is the fundamental of being a good princess.” You tilt your head and narrow your gaze on his face, searching it for any sign of trick.

“Well,” he shrugs as he slowly makes his way to you. “Learning magic is the fundamental of becoming a good princess too and then even better when you become queen.”

You scoff and manage an amused grin. “Queen?”

“Why yes, after I die who will rule Asgard?”

“Thor,” you respond.

Your father clasps his hands on his back and falls beside you, shaking his head as he’s quick to correct your answer. “What if I don’t want it to be, Thor? You my sweet si—daughter, will make a perfect fit to be queen, with your powers and knowledge. That’s why learning magic is beneficial.” He puts his hand on your shoulder and turns you around to walk off with you at his side. “What do you know about magic?”

“Not so much,” you shrug, “just a bit of what Loki and Frigga taught me.”

“Don’t you want to learn more?” Your father presses as he guides you out of the golden castle. “Just imagine with your powers and magic combined, you’d be powerful.”

Perhaps you should question his behavior deeper, really just think about what he was proposing—learning magic from your father?

But that part of you that felt your fathers negligence in the past loved the attention he was recently giving you. You desired to be loved by him like he loved Thor. So that’s why you didn’t want to question this strange new behavior.

You smile widely and finally come to an easy agreement. “Okay I want to learn more magic.”

“Good,” your father pats your shoulder, guiding you to the green gardens outside. “First let’s see your power, what’s your highest running record now?”

“Forty-five seconds.”

“Hmm,” your father hums as he parts away and stops you both in your tracks, stepping to the side to stand before you. “Have you tried incorporating your lightning when you run? It'd be like when you travel with your lightning from one place to another; it’s instantaneous and happens in a blink of an eye, right?”

“Right,” you nod whilst you place your books down. “How come I’ve never tried that before?”

“Try it,” your father insists.

With a newborn eagerness to impress your father before you, you summon lightning and do a quick outfit change, feeling a new surge of happiness within you at this moment. Albeit a small hint of doubt sparked in your brain. You began to stretch and didn’t fail to question what irked you. “Father, are you not busy? I just mean, lately all you’ve done is been with...me.”

Your father walks back to stay at a safe distance from you when you run, crossing his arms over his chest and shrugging, “well is it a crime spending time with my only daughter.” He finishes with an almost nervous chuckle. “Anyways stop thinking too much about it and break that record so we can get to teaching you magic.”

You stand up straight and nod apprehensively, getting into a running stance and then looking at him one last time to see him point his head in the way you were going to run. That single gesture sets you off to super speed your way through your usual running coarse, but this time unlike the other using lightning like your father suggested and finding that it gave you an incredible boast. Even the way you saw your surroundings was different, before you would only see the same greenery, the great blue water and beautiful green lush forest; now you saw lightning, it was like traveling through the Bifrost.

And regarding your personal running record, it did wonders to it.

Once you returned to your previous spot you saw your father smiling at you for what seemed to be the first time in ages. “Good job, y/n. You got twenty-five seconds off your previous record!”

At first you’re confused on how to take his positive feedback, his appreciation that you just stare at him dumb-struck and in slight awe. It isn’t until much later do you find your right reaction; you beam at him and utter, “thank you, father.”

——

“Oh, brother. This is it. I take my leave.”

“You fool, you didn’t listen!”

Tears fill your eyes and you wipe away the tears that had already rolled down your cheeks.

“I’m sorry.”

“Lady Sif, get help!”

“Somebody help!”

Yeah, you didn’t really agree with that slight part, Lady Sif was a spectacular warrior and deserved more than that part in the play. But nonetheless it was just play.

“I’m sorry for all I’ve done.”

“Shh. It’s all right. Hold on.”

“I’m sorry I tried to rule earth.”

“They’d be lucky to have you.”

“I’m sorry about that thing with the Tesseract. I just couldn’t help myself. I'm a trickster.”

“Yes. So mischievous.”

“I’m sorry about that time I turned you into a frog.”

You yawn and lean back in your seat, grabbing a piece of fruit and throwing it in your mouth as you continue to watch the play, crying one last time when fake Thor cries out, after that you grew bored and watched as the play ended. Once it was you jumped to your feet to attempt to leave, but then at your side you saw the real Thor.

When he noticed that you saw him, he smiled and waved and you followed by speeding towards him, instantly getting welcomed by a hug. “Hello, sister.”

“Thor! You’re finally back!” You beamed up at him.

“Yes, for a more permanent stay this time.” He informed you as you parted away, drifting his gaze to your father now. “Father.”

“Uh, my son, Thor, has returned!” Your father announced, “greetings my boy.”

The crowd around clapped and Thor seemed to be unamused by this whole ordeal. “This is an interesting play, what's it called?”

“The tragedy of Loki of Asgard. The people wanted to commemorate him.”

That’s very doubtful, considering what he did.

“Ah, indeed they should. I like the statue. A lot better looking then he was when he was alive, though. A little less weaselly, less greasy, maybe.” Thor continued making your father laugh nervously and made you just look at him amused and confused. “Do you know what this is?” Thor asked as he lifted the huge Skull in his hand.

“The skull of Surtur. That’s a formidable weapon!”

Thor proceeds to hand the skull to a guard, “do me a favor. Lock this away in a vault so it doesn’t turn into a giant monster and destroy the whole planet.” Thor walks forward and gestures you to follow him.

“Thank you, dear. Um, so it’s back to Midgard for you, is it?” Your father questioned Thor, gaining your full unwavered attention even if he had answered that to you already.

“Nope.” Thor answered as he threw his hammer up and then caught it with ease. “You know I’ve been having this reoccurring dream lately. Every night, I see Asgard fall into ruins.”

“That’s just a silly dream,” your father turned Thor down, “signs of an overactive imagination.”

“Possibly.” Thor quipped, “but then I decided to go out there and investigate. And what do I find, but the nine Realms completely in chaos.” Thor repeats his previous action with his hammer and gets closer to your father. “Enemies of Asgard assembling, plotting our demise all while you, Odin, the protector of those Nine Realms are sitting here in your bathrobe, eating grapes.”

When you look at your father you notice that he appears quite nervous, it was strange, very strange, but considersing that Thor wasn’t amused and appeared threatening, you stayed silent.

“Yes, it is best to respect our neighbors’ freedom.”

“Yes, of course the freedom to be massacred.” Thor throws his hammer forward, frightening the crowd and puzzling you even more.

“Yes,” your father tries to excuse himself and his negligence, “besides I’ve been rather busy myself.”

“Watching theater.” Thor remarks.

“Well, raising a teenage daughter, board meetings and security council meetings.”

“You’re really going to make me do it?” Thor quips, receiving just a simple question from your father before Thor throws his hammer far and walks behind your father, to threaten him. “You know nothing will stop Mjolnir, as it returns to my hand. Not even your face.”

“Thor!” You call frighteningly, receiving a quick smug answer.

“Watch this, sister.”

“You’ve gone quite mad. Y/N, stop him. You’ll be executed for this.”

“Then I’ll see you on the other side, brother.”

Your eyes widen and you freeze in your spot, keeping your gaze stuck on the pair beside you and gasping as your father transforms into Loki.

“But,” you try to question through your confusion, “but…” you pause and Loki turns to you, trying to approach you as you stay frozen and in disbelief with tears filling your eyes. “You...lied.”

“Y/N, I can explain.”

[moonknightly]

bittersweet & delicate : modern! poe x reader

Word Count: 2.2k

A/N: kes dameron is a dilf

Warnings: i think i said a bad word

Poe’s never been good with silence. He’s always been a loud person with a roaring personality to match, full of charm and charisma that he’d learned from his father. He’s always talking, always spewing stories and telling jokes to the people around him, and in the rare moment’s when he's verbally silent, you know that his mind is racing with ideas and memories replaying through his head.

But now, he’s just quiet. So quiet you’re beginning to worry about him. He’s sitting completely still at the island with his chin resting in the palm of his hand, and you’re leaning against the counter opposite of him, watching him closely, your eyes never straying from his face, just like his never moved from the small yellow envelope in front of him.

He’s been staring at that envelope all afternoon.  

You know what’s in it. You know why he’s quiet, why he can’t do anything but stare.

You know he’s waiting to open it until Kes gets there, but part of you wonders if he’d even be able to do it without him. He’s not ready.

He’s scared.

Fear — another bullet point on the list of things he���s never been good with. It makes him shut down, makes him forget to take care of himself until it passes or until he buries it down far enough to ignore.

But he has you, and if you can do anything, you can take care of him.

You know he hasn’t eaten, there aren’t any dishes in the dishwasher and you’d just unloaded it that morning. You honestly can’t remember if you’ve even seen him drink anything.

So that’s what you grab first. You slide the glass of water across the counter towards him, and he glances at it briefly before looking up at you with appreciation evident in his eyes. He takes it and raises it to his lips, finishing the whole thing in just a few seconds. You immediately pour him another glass, then silently move around the kitchen, trying to figure out what you can cook from what you have on hand.

You decide on some soup and a grilled cheese — simple, easy, comforting and fit for the occasion as well as the cold and snow outside. He finishes the soup first, and though he only eats half of the sandwich, that’s good enough for you.

“Thank you,” he mumbles once he’s finished, and he stands to clear his dishes but you grab them before he can, kissing his cheek in the process.

His cheeks turn a little pink like they always do, and you’re happy to see that even in his current state, your kiss can still make him blush.

“No problem, sweet boy.”

Poe smiles. He fidgets in his seat, and you can tell by the expression on his face that he feels awkward and unsure. Two more things he’s unfamiliar with. You leave his dishes in the sink to worry about later, then move to sit next to him.

You take his hand in yours and immediately notice that his fingers are slippery, covered in sweat but you don’t even flinch. You lean forward and kiss the tip of his nose this time, and the way that he scrunches his face makes your chest bloom.

“You doing okay?” you ask, though it seems a little redundant.

He shrugs his shoulders gently, takes a deep breath and sits up a little straighter. That tells you more than enough — he’s trying to make sure you don’t worry about him, he wants to appear like he’s held together by more than a few frayed threads.

“Just a little stressed out baby.”

“Liar.”

Poe sighs and shrugs again. He’s quiet for a moment, and when he does decide to speak, his voice waivers.

“I just...what if this isn’t it?”

Your arms are immediately around him, your hand on his head so you can cradle him against your chest. He lets you hold him, but doesn’t give you a chance to speak.

“The crash was over twenty years ago, there’s no way-”

He’s interrupted by a knock on your front door, and neither of you get up to answer it. You know it’s just Kes, and Kes knows he can just walk inside. He’s early, and Poe’s face falls. He’s not ready.

But again, you don’t think he ever will be. Even with Kes there to help him through it, even with you.

You listen as Kes kicks his shoes off in the hallway and hangs his jacket up on a hook. He sighs, and it’s quiet for a few seconds before you hear his footsteps walking towards you. He’s nervous too, you could feel it the second he walked through the door.

It’s warranted.

He takes a seat next to his son, his eyes fixating on the envelope sitting in front of him, just like Poe’s.

It still catches you off guard sometimes, how insanely alike the two Dameron’s look, how they share so many of the same mannerisms. Their smile is the same, their laugh is the same. They both rub the back of their neck when they’re embarrassed, and their cheeks turn the subtlest shade of pink.

They both have beautiful, breathtaking brown eyes, but you’ve seen pictures and know that Poe’s are one hundred percent Shara’s.

You know that Kes thinks the same every single time he looks at his son, because he gets this look in his eyes that’s so tender and warm or, depending on the day, far off and distant and sad.

Right now, it’s the sadness that prevails.

Kes sighs and shakes his head just a little bit. He runs a hand through his hair and pushes his glasses further up the bridge of his nose before lightly touching Poe’s shoulder, offering him support and reassurance, but you know Kes needs the contact for himself too. His hand is shaking.

“You okay kiddo?” he asks quietly, clearing his throat a little bit to hide the way it cracks.

You notice, but Poe doesn’t seem to. He only gives his father the same shrug he gave you, but he doesn’t look at him. He just keeps his eyes on the envelope.

Kes sighs again, and you bite your bottom lip, unsure if you should leave the two of them alone so they can have this moment together or if you should excuse yourself into another room. Kes glances towards you, almost like he can sense what you’re thinking — you’d always been close with him. He shakes his head, silently asking you to stay. You nod once.

Another round of silence takes over the room, with Poe still staring at the envelope and both you and Kes staring at him. Again, it’s Kes who breaks the silence.

“Do you want me to do it?”

Poe stays completely still, completely quiet. For a moment, you’re not sure he even heard his father’s question, but he finally shakes his head and reaches forward. His hands are shaking too.

He takes the envelope and turns it over his hands a couple of times, his teeth catching on his bottom lip while he prepares himself to open it. Kes keeps his hand on Poe’s arm, and you gently start to play with the hair at the nape of his neck — something you know Shara used to do to calm him down.

“Poe we don’t have to do this right now,” you remind him, your voice as gentle as you could possibly make it.

“No,” he answers immediately after, shaking his head hastily. “No, I don’t wanna wait any longer.”

He tears the envelope open before you and Kes can even blink. He hesitates again, for just a moment before reaching inside and grabbing a small card, a short message scribbled across it in messy handwriting. He passes it to his father, who also has no interest in reading it just then. They just want to see what else is inside.

Poe reaches back in and pulls out a clear plastic bag, but his fingers are hiding whatever sits inside. He stops again, takes a few deep breaths, then slowly opens his fist.

That breath was pointless, because all of the air comes rushing from his lungs in a single second. Kes immediately turns and buries his face into his son’s neck, and you watch as his shoulders begin to shake.

Sitting in Poe’s palm is a simple yet beautiful silver ring, one that you’ve only seen in pictures but instantly recognize. It’s unmistakingly Shara’s — no one had to look at the engraving to know for sure. It’s hers, without a single doubt it’s hers.

“Oh my God,” Kes breathes, picking his head back up to look at it again, almost like he’s making sure it’s still there. “Fuck.”

Poe’s still so quiet, just staring at the ring in his hand, completely entranced by it. You wipe at the tears running down your cheeks, then hug him again, kissing the top of his head over and over.

He brings it closer to his face, wanting to get a better look at the ring he hasn’t seen in over twenty years, the ring he used to play with when he was a small boy and couldn’t sleep at night. He’s told you the story before, so many times.

Shara would slip it onto a chain for him whenever he’d wake up from a nightmare. Whenever he was scared of the monsters hiding under his bed or whenever there was a storm raging on outside, she’d clasp it around his neck to wear for the night. She’d promise him that it would keep him safe, protect him from all of the bad and bring him peace, make him feel at ease enough to rest. It always worked.

He still has the chain, he’s worn it every single day since he was eight years old, but the ring had gone down with Shara, buried in the sand along with the remnants of her broken and charred plane. Kes had gone to look for it so many times after the crash, but he’d never been able to find it. The only thing he’d managed to bring back were burnt pieces of metal — a piece for him and Poe each that they both held onto with pride.

And so a month before, when Poe got an email from a man claiming to have found his mother’s ring while he was surveying the area with his metal detector, from a man who said he’d spent the last six months trying to track Poe or Kes down, he hadn’t believed it. It just didn’t seem possible.

But there it was, sitting in the palm of his hands. The man had even gotten it professionally cleaned.

All three of you sit there and just continue to stare at it, your emotions staying somewhere between disbelief and awe. You don’t know how much time passes before Poe finally shifts, holding the ring out to his father.

Kes takes it. He touches it so carefully, so gently, almost like it’ll break between his fingers. There’s still tears rolling down his cheeks, and you can’t tell if they’re happy or if they’re sad. You figure it’s somewhere in between.

“What are you going to do with it?” Poe asks quietly, his gaze flickering between the ring and the other man’s face.

Kes furrows his eyebrows and shakes his head. Ever since he found out that someone might have found the ring, there’s only been one thing on his mind, one option.

“What am I going to do with it? What are you going to do with it?”

Poe mirrors his father’s expression, and again you’re reminded of how eerily similar they are. “What do you mean? Dad, that’s yours.”

“It was your mother’s.”

“Yeah, and-”

“No.” Kes shakes his head again and reaches for Poe’s wrist. He flips his arm so he can set the ring back into his hand, then closes his son’s fingers around the piece of jewelry. “She’d want you to hold onto it.”

His eyes flicker to you, for just a moment before he looks back at Poe.

“Find someone to give it to one day or something.”

Poe’s quiet again, for almost a minute before he finally speaks again, his voice quiet, almost timid. “Are you sure?”

Kes nods, a small smile playing at his lips. He squeezes Poe’s wrist before letting go.

“Positive kiddo.”

Poe nods too, but he still really only stares, not sure if he wants to cry or smile.  

“I can put it on your chain, if you want,” you offer, already moving to unclasp it from around his neck.

That elicits a smile from him, but you’re too distracted to notice.

So distracted trying to get the chain undone, you also miss the look he shares with his father in that moment.

There’s only one thing on his mind, one option.

That ring, his mother’s ring belongs with you.

Now he just has to find the right moment to give it to you.

[rmg91]

Clearing the Air

Because we need more Douxie and Jim bonding moments. ...And I wanted to write these two mooning over their girlfriends.

Also on; AO3

                                               ~*~*~*~*~*~

It was a normal day in Arcadia Oaks, or well...as normal as it got for our heroes nowadays with all that had been happening in the mortal and mystical worlds. Point was none of their current big threats were in front of them and they weren't being chased by goblins or gnomes so yeah, normal day for the Trollhunters. A day to try to catch up on missed homework, play video games or hang out with friends who didn't have the weight of the worlds on their shoulders. Or, in Jim Lake Jr's case, do a favor for your girlfriend because you couldn't say no when she called and begged you to help someone instead of her because she had to now watch her baby brother. Now here he was, assisting their newest team member organize some new books at the Arcane Books store.

He didn't mind helping, really, he was doing Claire a favor after all and he'd do practically anything for her and there wasn't really anything wrong with Douxie...The guy was a real life wizard of all things! And had known and worked under Merlin, the very same who had created his amulet, which was honestly just a little awesome he had to admit, but...but he still couldn't help but, well...be jealous of the guy! He was always so buddy-buddy with Claire and making her laugh and giving her little tips on magic and a ton of other things! And of course Jim knew Claire was her own person and not an object and could have other friends but he just...he just couldn't help thinking some days that she was his girlfriend and that this show-off, flirty wizard needed to back-off! Of course he couldn't -would never actually- say anything as he didn't want to upset the raven haired witch he'd been crushing on for so long.

Still he just couldn't fight that ugly, awful, tight feeling of jealousy in his chest whenever he saw the pair together or when the wizard would inquire about doing something with her.

“So Claire had to watch that little scamp of a brother, eh?” Came the accented voice of the, much older, teen as he came back down from the second level for more books.

“Yeah, guess her parents had something to do.” Jim shrugged, not really turning to face Douxie as he shelved more books. He scolded himself inwardly for the flat response, his mother would not be proud of him, but every time Douxie brought up Claire Jim felt the jealousy monster clawing it's way up his throat and he immediately went out of character.

Douxie blinked and tilted his head, still curious as to why the newest Trollhunter seemed to be always giving him a partial cold shoulder. The rest of the gang seemed pretty accepting, Toby was always begging him to see some magic and of course he had hit it off with Claire, but the teen across him seemed to be keeping him at arms length. And he kept feeling glares at his back from time to time. Unsure what he possibly could've done to the usually kindhearted and accepting teen, Douxie scratched at head, flashing a look at Archie (who was, of course, feigning sleep on the counter), before shrugging and collecting a few more books out of a box. He'd figure it out one day.

They worked in relative silence, every attempt Douxie made to converse with Jim to pass the time becoming stilted and stiff. He had managed to start a promising conversation about cooking with the talented young chef but then he made a little quip about how he must of charmed Claire real good with his skills and maybe he could teach him some things, the wizard was hopeless in the kitchen despite his many years on earth, but something he said had shut Jim right down again. Frowning, there had to be some way to figure out what Jim's problem with him could possibly be.

“Oh, yeah! Don't let me forget to pass on a CD for Claire. Was gonna lend it to her but since she's not here...” Douxie said, tucking another book away.

“Ah...sure. I'll try to remember.” Jim muttered, firmly not looking at him from the other end of the store.

Huh...Douxie wasn't sure if he was crazy or not but a thought occurred to him just then, that Jim seemed to get closed off and tense whenever he mentioned Claire. He knew from his time talking to the budding witch that there hadn't been any fight between the two and, obviously, Jim was here on her request since she couldn't be herself, so why...? Suddenly it clicked as he listened to Jim mutter to himself and he had to shake his head. He really could still be such a moppet. The boy was jealous.

“Hey, Mate.” He couldn't believe he hadn't seen it before now. The glares, the grumbles, the way he sometimes wound his arm tighter around Claire.

“Hmm?”

“You're jealous, aren't you?”

“What?! No!!” Jim said frantically, all but giving it away with his reaction. How in the world had he figured it out?! He'd been trying to hide it!

Douxie chuckled and shook his head, crossing his arms as he leaned against a shelf, watching the young Trollhunter try and sort himself out, “It's alright, Mate.”

“No. It's not!” Jim said, throwing his hands in the air, “I know I shouldn't feel jealous but I am and-and I don't want to do something that might push Claire away but like I-I just can't help it!” He couldn't stop rambling now, trying to explain his feelings and why he kind of disliked feeling so jealous because somewhere deep down he knew it was silly.

“Jim.” He looked up, blue eyes meeting Douxie's hazel. “It really is alright.” The mage held up a hand to prevent Jim from speaking before he was done, knowing what he needed to hear, “Clare and I are just friends. Honestly I kind of see her as a little sister some days.”

“Really?” So all this jealousy really was for nothing?

“Mm-hmm.” The older boy nodded before gesturing with a slightly flourish as he moved, “And I'll have you know I've been quite happily taken for the past five hundred years or so! So, you really have nothing to worry about.”

“Really? You have a girlfriend?” Jim supposed that shouldn't be as big a shock as it was but well...it was considering just how old Douxie really was.

“Mm-hmm...” Douxie hummed, face going soft with a mushy sort of smile that Jim knew he too wore whenever he thought of Claire. “And she kick my arse if I made such a colossal mistake of breaking up with her. Not that I'd ever want to, mind.”

Jim nodded, understanding that feeling, “Yeah.”

“So, we cool, Mate?” Douxie asked, holding out a fist toward Jim.

Jim returned the fist bump with a smirk, “Heh, yeah, we're cool.” And wow was it a relief to know he'd had been worried for nothing.

And with the matter settled, the two finished the rest of the afternoon sorting and shelving books, talking and gushing over their respective girlfriends. Archie merely rolled his eyes, watching unnoticed at the counter, and shook his head at the two lovesick men before going back to sleep.

~*~BONUS~*~

A few days later found Jim leaning against the counter at the cafe, sipping at the coffee Douxie had just handed him as they watched their girlfriends talking outside, Claire holding in laughter as Zoe gestured with her hands. “So...How much are we gonna regret introducing those two?”

Douxie chuckled, “Ooh-ho....immensely.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Just let these two bond over their amazing girlfriends! Also let them sleep because they go through so much. Anyway, hope you enjoyed!

[kanene-yaaay]

5+1 [Part 3] - Updated

5 times Iida was tickled and the one time he wasn’t.

[PART ONE]

[PART TWO]

[PART THREE] - Not updated

Kanene’s note: Heyaaa! Okay, You may be wondering “Wait, but I already read that!” But there is where you’re mistaken!! This chapter was edited by the amazing, lovely @made-by-jade-222 who honestly did a very good job and that is so cute sxdfghjkjhyg.

Just remembering: Iida is 12 years old now!

Warnings, fun facts, random things and stuff:

* This characters don’t belongs to me! They all belong to the anime/manga Boku no Hero.

* This is a SFW tickle fanfic with family tickles, so, if you don’t appreciate this kind of content, please, look for another blog. There are a plenty of very greeat arts in this site!! ^w^)b

* This is Lee!Tenya with Ler!Hizashi + Ler!Aizawa with brief Ler!Tensei and Lee!Aizawa. All relationships are platonic. Around 1.800 words.

* Sorry for any spelling, pontuation and grammar mistakes! Any and every advice is very very welcome! \(-w-)/

* Take a very deep breath, sometimes that can be enough, drink water, sleep and eat! <33

[~*~]

Iida sat at the kitchen table, smiling to himself as he thought about the day’s activities and drank his special orange juice. It was an expensive brand, so he was only allowed to have it on special occasions, and his birthday was certainly one of them. His parents had planned to host his party in the evening after work so they could be there, along with the rest of their family. As for the day’s activities, Iida would spend the whole day hanging out with his brother, and his two honorary Uncles, Aizawa and Yamada. Iida had offered to help with the decorations, planning, organizing and everything but he’d been forced by his parents to sit back and relax for once. It was his birthday, after all.

(Tenya one day protested at the nickname, pointing it didn’t make sense call them ‘Uncles’ since they aren’t blood related. However, his parents explained that this was just a way to express fondness and closeness for someone you care about. The younger one began to call them uncles with more frequency, except on social gatherings)

Iida finished his breakfast quickly, though he savored the last of his special juice. He was beyond excited to be able to spend the day with his brother and uncles, he didn’t get to do that very often since their work took up most of their time. He was putting his dishes away when the doorbell rang. He answered the door, a polite smile on his face, about to greet his guests. The smile quickly faded.

There stood his two honorary Uncles, Aizawa and Hizashi. They were standing there with mischievous smirks on their faces, sending shivers down Iida’s spine.

“Hello! ~” Hizashi chirped. 

Hearing the sinister undertone of his uncle’s voice, Iida slammed the door in his face and backed away. He winced at how disrespectful that had been, but at the moment he valued his safety over his manners. But actually, he wasn’t anxious about what they were going to do. They were always nice and kind with him, making him smile and enjoy himself to give him a break from trying to be perfect, which he couldn’t. (Something they wondered if he’d ever learn.)

Tensei came into view as he quickly walked into the room, giving his little brother a smile as he ran into him. “Who’s at the door?” he asked.

“Uncles!” Tenya said, trying to move around him but being stopped by his brother’s hand on his shoulder. He frowned, blushing as he thought of his impending fate, which was all the more evident now that Tensei was here and would most definitely be on their side. “They are going to do the hideous tr-tradition that you started when I was a kid!” he said, or rather, whined, stumbling over his words. 

Tensei laughed, and Tenya pouted, though he’d deny that till the end of time.

“Oh, yeah! I forgot about that! It’s so nice of them to help me to remember our wonderful little tradition, isn’t it?”

“No! Far from it! Pro-heroes like you shouldn’t be committing such em-embarrassing, hideous acts in the first place, even l-less repeating it yearly!”

“Aww, you’re stuttering! You’re excited, aren’t you?” Tensei asked, smiling knowingly. His little brother could verbally protest all he wanted, but the eager gleam in his eyes gave him away. He ignored the squeaked “NO!” he got in responde and smiled even wider. Tenya made a move to leave, but Tensei grabbed him around the waist and held him close.

“You know, since they’re being so kind by helping us remember our tradition, it’s only fair that we let them participate, right?” Tensei asked, holding onto Tenya tighter as the nearing footsteps made him struggle all the more, trying to get away. “HEY, GUYS! THE BIRTHDAY BOY IS HERE!” he called.

“Tensei!” But the boy was already smiling, squirming excitedly on his brother’s hold, especially when a loud, happy ‘YEAHHH!’ boomed through the house.

“No, no! This is betrayal! Deception! Dishonesty! Trickery! Treason!”

Tensei laughed. “Now you’re just reciting the dictionary!” he said, no hint of regret in his voice, distractedly nodding at his uncles when they appeared at the door. “Look,” he whispered conspiratorially, “I need you to distract them until Shouta lets his guard down so I can sneak up on him. Hizashi would never pass up an opportunity to tickle him too, so while we’re doing that you go run and get something to bribe them with, okay?”

The younger gasped, quickly nodding. 

“Right. So, are you ready for your part of the plan, sidekick?”

“YES!” Iida shouted, chopping the air. Tensei squeezed his side to remind him to be quiet, but that only made him squeal. Thankfully, the two men who were walking towards them didn’t seem to catch on to their conversation. 

“Now, now. It seems like a certain little listener here is excited for birthday tickles!” Hizashi said, wiggling his fingers in his direction. “Oh! They grow up so fast!” he said, putting a hand on his chest and sighing longingly. “It feels like it was just yesterday that we were playing heroes! And I, the evil LoudChaos, would be defeated by Ingenium Junior and his vicious attacks of kicking his pillows at me!” The blonde ruffled his honorary nephew’s hair and then pinched his cheek playfully, grinning at the groan he got in response. 

Iida batted his hand away and faced the two of them, a determined look on his face. “You will never be able to crack me, villains! Not even with embarrassing childhood memories!” he said, gesturing energetically.

“I don’t know about that,” Tensei said, smirking. “I can think of plenty myself, like the time we had to buy at least three more of your favorite plushie because you wouldn’t let us wash the original one was pretty funny- ack! Hey, hey!” Tensei snickered as he tried to dodge from Tenya’s warning kicks, “I was kidding! I was kidding!” 

“Want me to hold him?” Aizawa asked nonchalantly, a small quirk of his mouth showing his amusement about the whole situation. At Tensei’s affirmative nod he quickly grabbed Tenya’s wrists and held them above his head with one hand. He smirked at his nervous nephew, who was trying to fight a smile. He ruffled his hair. “Congrats on being another year closer to death, brat. You’re twelve, so that means you’ve got...what, seventy eight more to go?” he asked.

Tenya’s face deadpanned, unamused.

“Ooh, right, twelve!” Hizashi’s fingers were teasingly getting closer, slowly and then even slower, almost touching a spot before pretending to launch at others, resulting in kicks and muffled shrieks from the younger one. “You know what that means, right, Shou?”

“Yep. We’ll have to tickle him for twelve years.”

“Aw, what a pity.”

“No! Lies! That is incorrect!”

“Oh really, not-so-little listener? Please, enlighten us.”

“According to the silly and foolish tradition that you insist on doing every year, you should tickle me for twelve entire minutes. One minute for each year,” Iida said automatically, going into school-mode, unaware that he was only sealing his impending doom. “That’s how it’s always been done.”

Aizawa and Yamada exchanged an amused look, while Tensei was doing his best to hold back his laughter. His little brother was just too precious.

“I don’t think I heard you correctly. We should, what?” Aizawa asked, his voice emotionless. questioned.

“Tickle me!” Tenya repeated, then gasped, realizing what they’d just tricked him into saying.

“Well, if you insist!” Hizashi said, then attacked. He reached out and used his skilled fingers to tickle and tickle every spot he could reach. 

There were fingers dancing on his ribs and poking his stomach. There were agonizingly ticklish scribbles and pokes and prodding at his sides, and even a couple squeezes on his knee. 

Iida squealed and burst into loud laughter, squirming in his tickler’s grip. The anticipation made him skip the giggles and just laugh right away. “HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”

A lazy and almost unbearably light touch drew shapes on his neck, then scribbled over to his ears and then all the way back to his collarbone, going from one side to another, over and over again. And no matter how much he scrunched his neck, that did nothing to deter the tickle monster.

“Coochie coochie coo, little listener!” 

“AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! NOHOHOHOHOHO!”

That unbearably embarrassing tease brought his focus back to his more aggressive tickler, who was currently targeting his armpits. His loud laughter, mixed with squeaks, yelps and guffaws at the mix of soft and aggressive tickles made him almost forget the teasing completely. Almost. 

“Have a tickle, tickle here!” He shook his head, trying to dislodge the fingers on his neck as his sides were squeezed. “And tickle, tickle, tickle there!” Spidering, tickly fingers on his shoulder blades made him squirm all the more. “Have all the tickles! Tickly, tickly, tickles here, there, and everywhere!”

“YOHOHOHOU WILL NOT DEFEHEHEAT ME!” Tenya shrieked, grinning from ear to ear as chuckles and giggles spilled freely from him. 

‘I have to stay strong!’ he thought. ‘I have to keep them distracted so Tensei can get Uncle Shouta!’ 

That was why he wasn’t fighting back much. He knew he could get away if he really wanted to. It certainly wasn’t because he enjoyed the silly, playful attention and affection from his uncles.

“Of course we will,” Shouta said, pausing to check the timer. “We still have five minutes left. I’m sure you’ll surrender eventually.”

“Nehehehehever!” Iida giggled, taking in several large breaths when his Uncle Hizashi decided to give him a break, leaving only the light tickles from Uncle Shouta to keep the smile on his face. But the break lasted only a moment.

“Hey, hey, hey, little listener!” Hizashi said in a sing-song voice.

Tenya knew that tone. He immediately shut his eyes tightly, a wobbly smile on his face, not noticing that the neck tickles from his other uncle had stopped. 

“Aw, come on Tenya! Don’t leave me hanging! Look at me, pleaaase?”

The boy shook his head, eyes still firmly closed.

“Shoouuu, he doesn’t want to see the big, great, amazing birthday surprise I have for him! He’s so ungrateful!”

Shouta scoffed. “No, he’s smart. And besides, it’s not his fault that you’re not charming enough to get him to look at you,” he said.

Hizashi gasped dramatically. “Oh! You wound me! Friendship ended with Ereaserhead! Tensei, you’re my new best friend!” he said.

He thought for a moment, then smirked.

“Buuuut, the vacancy is still open if maybe, just maaaybe,” A wiggly finger tickled under his chin, making Tenya snort, “if a clever teenager with a cute laugh and navy blue hair decides to open his eyes…”

“Yohohou will not crahack me!”

“Please? Please, please, please please please!” Hizashi begged, punctuating every word with a poke to the boy’s tummy, getting faster and faster until finally-

“Stop!” 

Iida opened his eyes, finding a very smiley Hizashi in front of him, who made a silly face. He half groaned and half giggled, the former action only due Aizawa’s renewed back tickles, of course.

“Aw, you didn’t find it funny?” The blonde crossed his arms, pretending to think about his next move. “Alright then, I know something that’ll make you laugh!”

And then, in a blink of an eye, he yanked up his nephew’s shirt and blew a gigantic raspberry on his tummy.

Tenya squealed and fell into hysterics, the sudden change in volume surprising Aizawa and making him let go for a moment. Then the man began to snort and try to fight his laughter as his other nephew, Tensei, attacked him from behind, tickling his unprotected armpits. His rumbling chuckles filled the air as Tenya fell to his knees, hugging his tummy and giggling non-stop as Yamada knelt next to him tenderly ruffled his hair, then kissed his temple before standing up. He grinned wickedly as he saw his best friend being tickled to pieces.

“Is it already Tickle Shouta hours?” he asked delightly. He cracked his knuckles and wiggled his fingers in Aizawa’s face, making a show of getting ready. He chuckled, amused, as his silly antics only made his best friend laugh even harder, covering his mouth and laying limply against Tensei, a slight blush on his face. Hizashi descended upon him with tickles, pulling his hand away and sending him into gales of laughter, his legs kicking from the silly tickles and teases he was getting.

And, as Iida laid on the cold floor, still giggling occasionally as he watched his uncle get tickled silly, he found that he didn’t actually mind this tradition. It was silly, it was foolish, and juvenile, but...it was also a lot of fun.

And it made him feel very loved.

[supercorpkid]

Midvale.

Supercorp, Kara Danvers x Daughter!Reader, Lena Luthor x Daughter!Reader, Alex Danvers x Niece!Reader, Kelly Olsen x Niece!Reader, Eliza Danvers x Granddaughter!Reader

Word count: 2400.

“Stop it!” You push Jamie to the side and Alex looks to the both of you from the car’s rear-view mirror.

“Hey! You two, that’s enough!” Alex says and you look at Jamie making a silly face. She sticks her tongue out and you roll your eyes. “Have we gone back in time and you two became eight years-old kids again, or what?”

“She just keeps kicking me.” You complain.

“Oh, like you could feel it?” Jamie puts her foot in front of your face, but doesn’t touch you.

“I can’t feel your kicks, but I can smell this horrible smelly foot of yours.” You push her leg out of the way.

“Hey.” Kelly looks back at you two. “Enough, or you two won’t ride together again.”

“Fine.” You two say in agreement and two seconds later are laughing and talking about people from school.

“They’re just like me and Kara.” Alex says with a smile, and you pretend you’re not listening.

“Well, if we’re talking about looks, it’s like me and Kara are having a weird fight about smelly feet.” Kelly also has a smile on her face. It’s not long until you see Gramm’s house from your window and you see Lena’s car parking in the driveway.

“We’re here. Please, no more competition on who can eat more, we all know you can’t win Jam.” Alex says and you laugh at Jamie.

“You just can’t win, loser.” You whisper and she kicks you again. “Ouch. Oh wait, can’t feel a thing.”

“Ok, you guys are seriously riding back with Lena and Kara. I can’t take another drive like this.” Alex says and she finally parks the car. You and Jamie run out of the car to your Gramm’s open arms.

“Oh, my beautiful girls!” Eliza says with a smile and then she kisses both of your heads. “Let me look at you. Wow, Jamie you’re so tall! Look at you.” She cups Jamie’s face and smiles. She then turns back at you. “Don’t worry, you’ll grow too, sweetie. Kara also took a while”

“Thanks Gramm.” You force a smile and she laughs.

“I made your favorite cookies. Go on, it’s in the kitchen.” She says to you and Jamie, and you both run.

“Leave me some, cookie monster!” Kara yells and you give her a thumbs up before disappearing into the house.

You love going to Midvale. Part of it is because your grandmother’s cookies are the best on the planet, and she is the coolest and most loving person you’ve met. But also, because the family is always together, and Gramm’s house is the perfect place to hang out with all of them.

You’re eating the cookies at super speed, when you see Lena going inside the house carrying her own bag. You get up right away.

“Here mom, let me help.” You take the bag from her hand and she smiles at you.

“Baby, it’s not heavy. I can carry it. Go help your momma.” Lena points at Kara in the driveway trying to balance everyone’s bag on top of each other, like a bad game of giant jenga.

“Dear Rao.” You run to her, Lena’s bag still in hand, and you help Kara with some others.

“I could do it.” Kara says, head finally peeking out of the top of bags.

“I know. But you could also have asked me for help, you know?” You say with a smile and Kara smiles back at you.

“Thanks, little one.” You two walk together to the house. “How’s the cookies? Did you save me some?”

“They’re soooo good!” You smile. You go on the porch and breathe in the salty air. You love Midvale. Kara looks at you and it’s like she can read your mind.

“Yeah, I love this place too.”

It’s after dinner, and the whole family is seated in front of the TV when Gramm shows up with some old tapes from your momma and aunt Alex’s childhood. It’s so weird watching Kara when she was about your age, you look too much like her.

“See Lena? She’s me!” Kara points at the TV with a cocky smile. Lena rolls her eyes.

“She might look like you, but she thinks like me.” Lena says putting her hand on your shoulder and giving it a little squeeze, you smile back at them.

“You are all wrong.” Eliza says and you turn back at her. “She looks and thinks like herself. She’s one of a kind.”

“That’s true.” Alex agrees on your side and you smile at them.

“Thanks guys.”

You and Kara stand up at the same time. You hear sirens and screaming at a distance. There’s also a loud cry for help. Everyone stops what they’re doing to look at the two of you.

“You hear that?” You ask your momma and she shakes her head.

“Supergirl emergency.” Kara says running out of the house while unbuttoning her shirt. You run after her.

“Do you want me to go too?” You ask expectantly. Kara turns back on you.

“No, it’s ok, little one. I’ve got it.” She says and flies right after. You are still at the door, with your back turned to your family, but you can feel everyone’s eyes on you. You don’t even have to turn around to know they’re looking at you in pity. Your cheeks burn and you feel very stupid.

“Baby, come on, let’s watch your momma’s first Halloween on Earth.” Lena calls you and you breathe deep wiping one tear from your chin.

“I’m good. Think I’ll shower.” You turn on your heels and run upstairs, so they don’t see you crying. You see that Jamie mentions to run after you, but Alex holds her.

You take a long shower, but you don’t feel like going downstairs anymore. You know they’ll look at you like you’re just a kid, and you can’t deal with that.

“Hey, sweetie.” Eliza walks on the porch a while later, and sits next to you. “What are you doing out here all alone?” You shrug. She puts a blanket over hers and your lap. “No stars in the sky, no cute neighbors in sight. What are we looking at?”

“Nothing.” You answer and she snugs you on her side.

“Any particular reason on why you’re not with your cousin having fun?” You could hear your Gramm speaking all day. Her voice is so calm and sweet. You shrug again. “Ok.” She kisses the top of your head. “Did you know I am very good at reading silences?”

You breathe deep, still listening to the ocean. She gives you some time to think about it and say what you want to say.

“Can I tell you a secret?” You look at her and she shakes her head agreeing right away. “I went to the future in another reality.”

“You did?” She has a confused expression, but is trying to sound nonchalantly about it, like it’s something she hears every day. “That’s cool.”

“Not really. No one in the family knew me and I got to see what their lives would be if I didn’t exist.” You breathe heavily. “Jamie’s life was so much better.”

“Aw, sweetie. I bet that’s not true.” She tights the embrace.

“It actually was. She had friends and a boyfriend. She was a cheerleader.” Eliza smiles at the thought, like it’s a weird one. “She didn’t get stuck with a Luthor so no one hated her for no reason.”

“But I bet she didn’t have a best friend who is also her cousin and feels like a sister.” She says trying to calm you. It doesn’t work.

“Moms were fine too. I mean, they got excited when they found out about me, but I don’t know…” You get up from the couch. “What if everyone’s life was so much better without me?”

“Impossible. I know that for sure.” She stands up too and goes to you.

“You can’t possibly know that, Gramm.” She cups your face and wipes one tear that is falling. “Lena wouldn’t have to worry about me going full Luthor someday. And Kara, she wouldn’t have to worry about a kid wanting to go with her to fight villains.”

“Ah, there it is.” Eliza says too knowing. “Sweetie, she just wanted you to hang back and enjoy your family. Listen, come here.” She sits back and you reluctantly join her. “You will have your whole life to fight bad guys and save the world. You don’t have to rush into it.”

“I’m not rushing-” You start, but she doesn’t let you finish.

“I know it’s fun. Flying around? It must be awesome.”

“I just… I can handle, you know? I was all alone in a different reality, two years in the future, and I handled it.” You say and she shakes her head agreeing. “I could help her. But she doesn’t need my help, and Jamie surely doesn’t need me destroying her chances of having normal friends and I don’t know, a career as a cheerleader.”

Eliza laughs at that, and she puts her arms around you again, sits back and stays there in silence, and you feel there’s nothing she can say to calm you.

“You know, sweetie, you were not accidental. You have no idea how many sleepless nights Lena spent in the lab to figure out how to get you into this world. Or how many times Kara had to expose herself to Kryptonite so Lena could draw her blood.” You look at her with eyes full of tears. How did you not think about this before? “Do you actually think two people whose lives were better without you, would go through all that?”

“Probably not.” You say embarrassed and she smiles.

“Just remember that without you, something would be missing in all of our lives, and nobody would be able to replace it.” She kisses your head and you agree.

“Hey.” Jamie walks and looks at you two in silence. “What’s going on here? Why wasn’t I invited to the Gramm-granddaughter hang out?”

“Well, because your cousin here went to a different reality where she didn’t exist…”

“Gramm!”

“And now she is convinced your life would be much better without her.”

“That was a secret! You just told my secret.” You complain and what you get in response is a chuckle.

“God, sometimes you’re so dumb.” Jamie says and Eliza stands up giving her space to sit next to you. She disappears right after. “Seriously, how can you be so smart and so dumb at the same time?”

“Shut up, you weren’t there. I know what I saw!” You push her and she rolls her eyes.

“Ok, dipshit. What did you see?”

“You had friends. And you were a cheerleader. You were laughing and talking to people. Like normal people, Jamie.” You shake your head. “You didn’t have an alien Luthor next to you.”

“Oh, so I was laughing? That’s it?” Jamie grabs her phone and goes to her photo album. She shows you a picture of you two. “Like this?”

“Jamie…”

“Or like this?” She shows you a video of you two being dumb together. “Or maybe, I was laughing like this?” And another video. You try to hold a smile at the video, but you can’t. “I don’t need friends, and I definitely don’t need to be a cheerleader to be happy. I have a sister, that’s much better.”

“Promise?”

“Of course I promise! You take me flying. I’m pretty sure none of those friends could do that.” Jamie says and you hug her. You two stay like that for a while until you see Kara flying in and laying down on the grass in front of the house looking exhausted. Jamie breaths deep and elbows you, pointing at Kara. “You should go talk to her.”

You don’t even argue, you know she’s right. You fly down there, and lay down next to Kara. She doesn’t look at you, but she moves her hand to hold yours.

“You know, I’m still getting used to the fact that my kid, who is not a kid anymore, has super powers and is such a badass that can help me with saving the world and all…” She squeezes your hand. “Should’ve brought you with me. Things would’ve been a lot easier.”

“Yeah.” It’s all you can say.

“I hope you’re not upset.” She snuggles in you, putting her head on your stomach and holding you tight like you’re the mom and she’s the daughter.

“You know you can ask for help, right? We know you can do it alone. You’ve been doing it for years now.” You scratch her head. “You don’t have to do it alone anymore. At least not every time.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I have to learn how to ask for help.” Kara says and then she breathes deep. “Did you know you smell like home?”

“I do?” You smile to yourself. You’ve always thought your moms smelled like home. It’s good to know you smell like that to them too.

“Mhm.” You can hear her smile. “And sweets.”

“That seems about right.” You two laugh. She doesn’t say anything else, she just keeps hugging you, and you keep playing with her hair. After a few minutes, Kara stands up giving you her hand.

“Come on, little one. Let’s go to bed. We have our big Danvers competition tomorrow and we have to be well rested to crush the Olsen-Danvers, proving once and for all that the Luthor-Danvers are better.”

The Danvers competition is just an excuse for you all to come to Midvale a few times a year. And to laugh at Lena running, Rao bless her soul. You all play a bunch of stupid games Alex and Kara created when they were little, go to the beach and eat the best food in the world.

“Obviously.” You take her hand and stand up. “There’s no competition.”

There is some competition, if you’re being honest. But only because the Olsen-Danvers came well prepared this time. In the end, the Luthor-Danvers won by two points, even with Gramm (the referee) clearly trying to get the Olsen side to stop losing.

The weekend is incredible. You look around at your family and smile to yourself. Your Gramm was right, something would be missing if you weren’t here. Yep, you really love Midvale.