#:: Sonic; Fastest thing Alive indeed ::

[crimjoyofmuses]

"Rail who???"

[crusherthedoctor]

Get a Load of Traits - PART 2: Dr. Eggman

It's that time again, folks. Time for another analysis you didn't ask for.

I explained how the setup goes with my previous installment revolving around Sonic, but to recap: for the sake of not dragging things out too much, I’ve decided to keep it all thematically consistent by sticking with 9 main points per character, in terms of what I personally consider the highest priorities for each of them. These will usually not be listed in any particular order of importance or relevance unless stated otherwise, and while there may be other major traits that might not get mentioned (in which case, feel free to bring them up yourself if you see fit), this keeps things simple and focuses on the points that have the most flexibility with how much of the character they encapsulate.

It should also be noted that these posts are made with the game portrayals in mind, because the games mark the core of the franchise, and as such, they objectively contain the purest essence of the cast. Adaptations generally like to play by their own rules, some more gratuitously and inexcusably than others, and this will inevitably crop up with certain entries. All that being said however, I’ll attempt to stay focused rather than devolve into another rant about this adaptation or that adaptation, only directly referring to them if I feel it’s necessary for the point being made.

Anyhow, for today’s installment, the spotlight shines on everyone's favourite villain that they pretend isn't a villain: Dr. Eggman.

He's larger than life.

Where could he be???

He's shaped like an egg. He laughs and bellows like it's going out of fashion. He proudly announces when he's in the room for no other reason than to inform everyone that he's in the room. He takes sadistic glee when you don't have enough memory in the memory card. Why would you want to sawdust away this side of him? What are you, a Hollywood writer?

Just as Sonic is a fun hero, it's integral that Eggman is a fun villain. He's all about the colour, the spectacle, the raw energy. This is non-negotiable. If you approach this character and think he needs to be made grounded because he has a silly name or something, then you are going about this the completely wrong way. Villains like Eggman get praised all the time for being vibrant and wacky, so frankly, there is no excuse to write him off for it.

He is genuinely smart.

"Oh yeah? Well if you played nice, I wouldn't need to transform you into a tedious gameplay mechanic that appeals to furries and is guaranteed to give this game negative reviews from IGN. Haha, gottem."

Look at the screencap above. He was able to turn the tables against Super Sonic right when it looked as though he was thoroughly cornered. How was he able to achieve this? By planning.

*leans closer to the mic*

P L A N N I N G.

Yes, he is not literally omniscient. Yes, he can be prone to the occasional oversight. Yes, unexpected events can transpire that would be difficult if not impossible for him to account for. But all that aside, Eggman is a genius. He does have an IQ of 300. He talks a big game, but with all the amazing tech he's created over the years, and with all the ways he's pulled a fast one over the heroes, he has proven that he can play the big game. Need I remind you that this is a human, and his arch-nemesis is the fastest thing alive, not some dude on the street. He would need to be on his A-game in order to last.

And yes, it is indeed him who does all that brainstorming. Ever since day 1, he's always been very hands-on with his operations, not needing to steal the credit from another scientist or force a hostage to do it all for him. His plans? His weapons? They're all him. Would a mere bumbler be able to subdue the Time Eater?

He is genuinely evil.

"What's this shite I'm hearing about a Mr. Tinker...?"

We've got the Triforce of Funny Man. We've got the Triforce of Real Intelligence. Now here comes the hardest pill to swallow: the Triforce of Actually Malevolent.

For reasons that can be pinned on certain portrayals that are coincidentally more commonly found in adaptations, fans are all too willing to remove agency from Eggman's villainy. When they're not claiming an amnesiac personality that peaced out as quickly as it arrived is his true self, they're claiming he has all these heated gamer moments for the purpose of avenging his Wasted™ grandfather, Professor Gerald Robotnik. Or they claim he's not as bad as other villains in the franchise because he "only" wants to conquer the world, rather than destroy it.

Now how can I put this gently...

No, I am not just saying this because I personally happen to favor Eggmen with proper villainous balls to their name rather than glorified frenemies with Sonic at best. Even when exorcising myself of all potential bias, the Eggman we see in the games is still a very different fellow from what a concerning number of fans say with a straight face he is.

He stuffs animals inside robots on a regular basis. He lies, cheats, and backstabs on a regular basis. He fired a laser at the planet with the intent to fracture it, with no consideration for destruction or fatalities. He conquered other planets just to reduce them to self-indulgent attractions for his theme park. He drove a friendly robot to insanity after they were willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. He wanted to destroy Station Square right out the gate, with the only difference come the end of his rope being that he changed tactics to more suicidal means out of desperation. When the Deadly Six were defeated, and the world remained in a dire state, his only reaction was to express relief that there was still something for him to lord over. And although Forces may have glossed over much of his rule, it's clear that it wasn't pleasant for anyone other than himself. Throughout all of this, he rarely brings up Gerald in a consistent manner outside of SA2 and ShtH, and in fact, even in those games, it's pretty clear that he only cares about Gerald's scientific legacy and how that makes him special in the process due to being his grandson. He's never been shown to give a damn about the rest of Gerald as a person, including the philanthropist he was at heart prior to his last days.

Not wanting to destroy the world is not an act of kindness. It's simple logic: he can't conquer something that's not there. And is treating the population to a lifetime of slavery really that softer than a quick and (relatively) painless death? I'm sure TV Tropes would say yes, but what do you think?

He's a self-made man.

Egg Jameson confirmed.

Our horizontally enlightened fiend did not start with a kingdom of his own. He was not a test tube baby who could shoot lasers out of his hands from day one. He was not born a demon, nor did he hail from a bloodline of gods. When he began his path in life of being a furry shamer, he had only his gadgets and tools to work with. Yet, he has managed to carve himself a bountiful list of pro gamer moves over the years despite his mortal human status, including harnessing the Time Eater as mentioned, bringing his dream Eggmanland to life in all its glory, and the engineering marvel that is Metal Sonic... and almost never suffering from financial troubles despite the frequent destruction of his machines at Sonic's hands. (Keep Sonic 4's name out your fuckin' mouth.)

And speaking of that last part, there has been evidence across the series that he has more than one way of ensuring the moolah keeps rolling in. We've seen him set up casinos, carnivals, Extreme Gear companies, newspaper factories, and other facilities to extend his reach. We've seen his robots mine for resources all over the world, and occasionally other worlds. We've seen him own a literal ocean of oil. We've even seen him sell his stripped down robots to chumps who don't know any better. For all his childish ways and penchant for plagiarizing the Death Star, he's surprisingly good at money management.

Then there's his specific approach to scheming and beating Sonic. Winning on its own is never enough for him: he wants to win on his terms, by doing things his way. So he might steal a shiny gem, but he'll use it to power the tech that he made. He might wake up a sleeping beast, but he'll have an Egg Carrier operating alongside it. The doc is always pulling his weight no matter the game, because if he didn't, how could he back up his self-admired intellect without it ringing hollow? You know he wouldn't be having that.

All of this goes a long way to explaining how he grew a knack for being so pro-active as a villain in the present day of the games proper. Instead of having it easy by being born an almighty superbeing, he had to work his way up using nothing but his brain. Because Dr. Eggman is a man with quite a few admirable qualities. Just a shame that morality is not one of them, no matter how much I've been gaslit by fans into believing otherwise.

His ego is his motive.

Don't say it.

As we discussed, for all his manufactured admiration of his late grandad's genius, he doesn't mention him as often across the franchise as fans would lead you to believe. But you know which moustached gentleman he does mention a lot throughout the franchise...?

An overfilled sense of pride is to be expected for a pure villain. Regardless of their motive and their means to fulfill said motives, they're expected to think highly of themselves to some degree. But Eggman is not your everyday egotist: he IS the ego. Many villains have made statues of themselves, but how many do you know who have defaced historical monuments and plastered their visage on them? How many villains do you know who call half of their machines Egg Something? How many villains do you know who make up every single boss in more than one installment?

That's because Eggman's ego isn't just part of his character: it's the source of his drive. Everything he does, everything he wants to do, is fueled by how much he loves himself, and how displeased he is that the rest of the world does not feel the same way. He wants everyone to bow down to his excellence, he wants to conquer the world to satisfy his lust, and even that wouldn't keep him satiated forever, since evidence has shown that he would just make a grab for the whole universe if he got bored. He cannot picture a world where anyone else matters, because they're not him. Over the span of three decades, his inflated self-worth at the cost of everyone else's agency and wellbeing has not diminished one iota, and unless SEGA decides to pander hard to the Eggdad standom, this is not likely to change anytime soon.

Which leads me to my next point...

The consequences are irrelevant to him.

Quote by Billy Mitchell.

Part of the recurring problem with Eggman being woefully mischaracterized as not such a bad guy when you get to know him is because people like to suggest that since he rarely shows outright sadism while committing his evil deeds (except this is also not true; see Tails' story in SA1, or the sheer ecstasy in his tone when he betrayed Emerl's trust in Battle), that means the results that spring from them are more excusable than the likes of Mephiles, Starline, Disney, etc.

Putting aside the fact that he's still willingly committing these deeds to begin with - with no regret at that - let's assume they mean in reference to ordinary citizens and the like. Now maybe it's true that he's not known to dedicate much of his career to making things personal with random nobodies. But let me ask you something: when he declared his intent to destroy Station Square with Chaos so he could build ROBOTNIKLAND THE ULTIMATE CITY WHERE I WILL RULE IT AAAALLLL COME ON CHAOS LET'S FIND ANOTHER EMERALD SHALL WE Eggmanland over its remains... did he say anything about letting the residents evacuate? Did he provide a means to help them evacuate?

What you need to keep in mind is that Eggman showing little interest goes both ways. He doesn't give any thought to these folk period. If his giant mech killed people who were in his way, or he fired a cannon at Whocaresville and the people living there didn't have time to get out of dodge, he's not going to shed a tear and call for a moment of silence. Because, as we've already established, the only person that matters is him. So long as he gets what he wants, and so long as there are still other people out there to worship him, what's the big deal if some kid is now without a parent or a home?

He is not a good master.

"Also, I did create a vaccine. That's what you get for listening to our loving fans who hate us."

Well, at least he shows a more caring side to his creations, right? Sure... if you don't pay any attention to how it plays out onscreen.

My dude is certainly willing to shower his creations with high praise, but what advocates of Good Guy Eggman fail to note is that he praises them because he made them. An achievement for them is an achievement for him, because how would they be so brilliant and competent if it weren't for who built them that way? And you know what else? That praise conveniently only manifests when the creation is doing their job: the moment they fall short of his lofty standards, he flips like a switch. Can it truly be considered sincere and from the heart if he's that willing to turn on them that easily?

Of his many robotic stooges over the years, two that he held in high esteem were the E-Series and Metal Sonic. He made a show of tasking the former with an important mission, and the latter has been recognized repeatedly as one of his crowning masterpieces. And yet, all of the E-Series bar Gamma were discarded and essentially left to fend for themself in an unfamiliar world, with Beta being forcibly modified without a second thought. Gamma was only spared because, you guessed it, he was the one with a victory to his name. As for Metal Sonic, for all his longevity and special treatment, he too is not immune to punishment in the event of failure or disobedience.

And Infinite? His prized right-hand man during his six month conquest? Whisked away without a word after one bruh moment too many, followed by making a point to show off his own mastery over the (real) Phantom Ruby.

Needless to say, this is a stark contrast from the goofy dad you often see in fanart.

His will is equal to Sonic's.

"I'm gonna have to reset, that was a practice run."

Being a regular human does not serve as a limitation for Eggman's status and capabilities, unless you're a hack writer who believes superficial power levels are the instant-win key to a good antagonist, or a well-crafted story in general. On paper, a hedgehog with Sonic's level of power should have dealt with this silly old man once and then never again. That happened with aliens. It happened with gods. It happened with talking ballsacks. Yet Eggman is still around. Despite being subjected to a wide selection of situations that should have Big Oof'd him, with Sonic normally not considering saving him from said perils a high priority, Eggman keeps surviving, and he keeps trucking on.

Why? Because main villain immunity, yes, but compared to Bowser the fire-breathing turtle, and Ganon the occasional boar-shaped demigod, a human scientist managing to persist for as long as he has is still impressive even without the out-of-universe justification. This detail of his character is even incorporated into his boss fights: the Egg Viper battle ends with a kamikaze attack. The Mega Death Egg Robot had a second machine stored inside it, keeping up where the fight left off as the first one conks out. S3&K in its entirety was practically dedicated to his absolute refusal to call it quits.

He doesn't give up. He never gives up. And he's not the type to piss his pants either. When the odds are stacked against him, he will either give it his all with much gnashing of teeth, or he'll retreat because it's the tactically sound thing to do. What he doesn't do is show fear and plead for his life. (Unleashed doesn't count, that was a Wily ploy.)

He hates Sonic.

Or else he wouldn't have made this.

You would think this would go without saying. You have not spent enough time in the Sonic community. I wish I was you. (Then again, I met my friends through it...)

There are many people - many, many, many people - who will vehemently drill into your head with the trustworthy assurance of a SonicTuber that Dr. Eggman, arch-nemesis of Sonic the Hedgehog, world's longest Attempted Sonic Murderer champion, secretly likes the guy deep down, and would never wish for the Blue Blur to actually kick the bucket for good. They claim that when push comes to shove, the old doctor would never fully commit to world domination, because he simply enjoys his bouts with Sonic too much.

For X!Eggman? Probably.

Boom Eggman? Definitely.

Game Eggman? The Eggman? No.

Eggman hates Sonic. Eggman loathes Sonic, and he loathes the rest of his multicolored accomplices just as fiercely. The amount of times he has tried to bust a cap in Sonic's ass is plausibly in the triple digits. He has subjected Sonic to all kinds of threatening, terrifying situations with the explicit purpose of either killing him or hitting him where it hurts. He shows happiness when Sonic is in pain, or has appeared to have been vanquished by his efforts. What about any of this suggests that he likes him? Because of respect?

Now yes, that much is true. It's evident that Eggman respects Sonic as an opponent who can keep up with him, and it's true that he enjoys their battles to an extent. That's not the same thing as actually liking the guy on a personal level. For all the respect he may wield, he would still gladly rid himself of the hedgehog the first chance he gets. Remember the big moment in SA2 in which he launched Sonic into space? He bid his farewell, in a semi-mocking tone, then went right back to business like it was nothing. And what about Forces? What did he plan on doing with Sonic once he got bored of waving his victory in his enemy's face? That's right, he planned on slamming the red button on him. Sorry you had to find out this way, that's what happens when you don't Play The Game.

Ivo Robotnik is a jovial man, but his goals are dead serious. He wants his empire more than anything else in the world, and he will get it. For whatever thrills their encounters may provide, he would piss on Sonic's grave without a moment's hesitation in order to make progress with his ambitions. If he wasn't serious about taking over the world... why the fuck would he do all that he does? Do you really think he spends all that time researching ancient tablets because he wants to be Sonic's friend? Do you think he enslaves alien races because it's not like he likes Sonic or anything baka kawaii desu (please don't unfollow me, I won't do it again)? I don't think so, chum. There'd be no game, and no franchise, if Eggman wasn't coming up with ways to put him in an early grave. And then probably vandalize the grave after.

---

If you understand all of these points, and if you can take to them, then I believe you should have what it takes to write a good, or even great, portrayal of Dr. Ivo "EDP445" Robotnik. No portrayal is going to be one-and-one with that of another, there'll always be subtle distinctions depending on the writer, but you'll be fine as long as he's not a softie or a fool who only exists to be replaced with a gay platypus.

Oh and, one last thing...

Heroes manual lied to you. Sorry, English fandom.

[crimjoyofmuses]

"You know I'm glad I didn't went that far....but the touches...ugh...I'm not used to that."

[raccoon-crown]

The Room of Portraits idea

I remembered that one fic form months ago, The Room of Portraits one, yeah, I'm not sure I'll finish it someday so I'm just gonna reveal what it was about.

It came from the thought of, What would happen if Sonic loses but like a fatal one? Yeah Sonic had an accident fighting Eggman and ends up like in a place a step before the other side.

He ends up in a infinite hallway full of door that only take to rooms full of Portraits of other people, some are closed and many other don't. Then he ends up in one that is fully dark except for the little light that a candle produces, one that he 'accidentally' gets trapped on.

The catch? The portraits on that Room in particular are his, there is one for each part of his adventures, since the classic ones to the modern ones.

Double catch? In what seems to be a never ending room with weird portraits he is not alone, there's someone following him, a particular black cat with a scythe and a business to finish with him.

It was kinda a funny story of how Sonic ended up running up Death itself, proving that he is indeed the fastest thing 'still' alive.

[pinkjunepeanut]

Blue Titans (Continued): Chapter 4

A last thwack left a minion crumple to the floor and Robin and Starfire were left standing. Starfire dimmed her glowing eyes to a normal green and Robin hooked the staff to his belt. They looked around at the dazed henchmen sprawled out on the ground and glanced at each other with suspicion. It seemed a little peculiar for Slade to strike them at a deserted building.

 Almost as if he didn’t want us here, Robin said to himself. He pressed onwards through the ghostly warehouse and Starfire followed behind.

 Her gentle voice was touched with worry as she passed over a groaning minion. “Do you think he may be hiding here?” He didn’t answer, but his silence gave her the answer she needed.

 The former sidekick of Batman had grown accustomed to matching a villain’s lair with their personality. For Slade, it just showed the rat he was, able to escape the clutches of death numerous times. Robin growled and clenched his fist. Starfire is right, he reminded himself, we still have a chance at stopping him. He searched the oncoming darkness with darting eyes. Something isn’t right.

 He slowed his pace and signaled Starfire to stop. The young detective crept to one of the cement walls and felt around it. Before the two got here, Robin took the initiative to study the blueprints of the warehouse and any details about its architecture.

 Where did those minions come from? They couldn’t have dropped through the roof, only hide near the ceiling, and they would have been spotted earlier if they used the entrance. He couldn’t answer the nagging question in his mind till he wiped the cold wall with a finger. He inspected his gloved hand and found what he was looking for. No dust.

 The rest of the place was layered with dirt and cobwebs, yet this section was recently cleared up. He studied the wall some more and found two notches slightly protruding out. To an on-viewer it would look like part of the wall’s rough texture, but the Titan knew better. He rested his index fingers on the small bumps and pressed. Instantly, a click sounded and the hidden door unlatched as it slid to the side. Starfire’s gasp was heard and Robin’s eyes widened.

 There standing before them, was Slade himself.

 ___________________________________________________________________________________

Meanwhile…

 Tree, tree, tree, rock, tree—wait, rock?

 Beast Boy backed up and looked inside the bracken. Indeed, there was a rock hidden underneath, but had a grayish tint to it. The shape-shifter groaned and continued on. How were they supposed to find this emerald? It’s been a three-hour search and still no luck. A constant blue blur raced around him and snaked through the forest. It returned to him and stopped, revealing the cobalt hedgehog. A shake of the speedster’s head had Beast Boy flop on the ground.

 “How much longer do we have to search?” He glanced up at Sonic with frustration, “it IS here, right?”

 Sonic scratched his head and chuckled. “Yeah, about that… it could have warped anywhere.”

 Beast Boy’s eyes widened at this and his head fell back down. He outstretched his hands to the sky in exaggeration, “Then why are we even looking here?!”

 Sonic shrugged and stretched out. “I said, ‘it could have warped anywhere.’ But usually one’s around the last spot it was used…” Sonic froze at his words. A confident grin formed on his face and he dashed back the way they came. “Race ya back to Cyborg!”

 Beast Boy stared at the cloud of dust left behind and pulled at his ears. “After this is over, I’m playing ‘Mega Monkeys 4.’” He pushed himself up and transformed into a cheetah as he followed the fastest thing alive.

 ___________________________________________________________________________________

 Cyborg was operating his arm while rotating a miniature satellite embedded in his shoulder. So far, no change in locking on a coordinate; the emerald was popping up all over the place. Before he could tear his arm off, a gush of wind whirled by him and he turned to see Sonic standing next to him. The Titan raised a brow at the hedgehog. “Anything?”

 Sonic shook his head with a smirk, “Nope, but I’ve got an idea.”

 A rustling of bushes startled them and they turned to see a cheetah with sticks and leaves stuck to his fur. Sonic covered his mouth to hold back a snicker and Cyborg couldn’t help but grin. The large cat turned back into Beast Boy and the teen jabbed a finger at them.

 “DON’T. TELL. RAVEN.”

 That was the breaking point. Sonic dropped his hand and started laughing his head off. “What…” he managed to say between breaths, “you don’t want a STICKY friendship?” He fell to the ground and rolled in laughter. The two Titans looked on in annoyance.

 Cyborg twitched an eyebrow, “Man, that was cheesy, even for you.”

 Sonic snickered as the humorous moment passed and he got to his feet. “Sometimes they’re the best.” Beast Boy pulled the debris off his suit as Sonic continued where he left off. “Before I warped here, I was fighting Eggman at his base.” His iconic grin showed, “I think the emerald warped to those coordinates on this world.”

 Beast Boy was stumped. “Why didn’t you and the emerald warp together?”

 The hedgehog shook his head, “At the speed I was traveling, I probably got teleported to a random place. But the Chaos Emerald…” He tapped his foot in thought, “it was last used on the base and it would have been sent to the same spot here.”

 Cyborg pondered on this and nodded. It seemed logical the emerald would stay rooted to its spot whereas Sonic’s velocity would have carried him miles away; he could break the sound barrier after all, so who’s to say warp-speed wouldn’t further stretch the distance? He opened a plate of armor on his other arm and started up his navigation system. “Do you have the coordinates?”

 Sonic gave a thumbs-up and chanted, “40.8655 Degrees North, and 73.8092 Degrees West.” Cyborg and Beast Boy stared at him dumbfounded, but Sonic shrugged it off. “I watched Tails punch it in a hundred times on the Tornado.”

 Cyborg, still in a state of shock, slowly nodded and typed in the coordinates. Instantly, his hardware picked it up and tracked it from halfway across the city in another woodlands area. “I’ve got a match,” he pointed diagonally to his right, “Northwest. I’ll send the T-car here while you go ahead.”

 “Sounds like a plan,” Sonic did some final stretching before turning to Beast Boy. “You coming?”

Beast Boy looked back at Cyborg, then to Sonic. He groaned and dragged his feet to the hedgehog. “Fine, but I’m not dashing off again.”

 Sonic chuckled and bolted into the woods while Beast Boy tailed behind as a peregrine falcon. Cyborg watched them disappear and homed in on his car.

 “Hope the others are in better luck.”

 ___________________________________________________________________________________

 The city cameras were still up as Raven continued her investigation; her short, lilac hair hung above her shoulders with her hood down as her eyes focused on every detail displayed. A soft groan sounded behind her but she didn’t bother looking. “You’re up.” Her comment was left unanswered and the footsteps from behind grew louder.

 She spotted Shadow through her peripheral vision leaning on the door. He scoffed and Raven braced herself for his prideful lecture. “I am the Ultimate Lifeform,” he huffed, “I don’t go down so easily.”

 And there it is. She rolled her eyes and kept typing.

 Shadow walked up and stood beside her in front of the screens. “What are you looking for?”

Raven kept her eyes on the monitors. “Not what,” she corrected. “Who.” She enlarged one camera view, saw no one was there, and carried on. “And as for your answer, Slade.”

 She noticed Shadow fold his arms and study the screens. “Is he the foe of your world?” She gave a small nod and Shadow closed his eyes and sighed. “Some things never change.”

 Raven’s curiosity got the best of her and she paused to look at the hedgehog. “Do you have a lot of enemies on your world?” Shadow turned his head away with arms locked.

 “Tsk. That’s none of your business.”

 Raven glared at him, but before she could say anything, a yellow blur whizzed past them. The two stopped to look and watched the colored streak circle around and stop on the dime before them; the newcomer was grinning from ear-to-ear and Raven instantly recognized him. She turned back to her work while calling over her shoulder. “Hello, Kid Flash.”

 The native speedster’s voice echoed in the room. “Hey, Raven.” A long silence followed before he quipped, “who’s the black Sonic clone?” Raven’s eyes widened and she twirled around to shut him up, but it was too late.

 The hedgehog didn’t take this lightly. He marched up to the yellow-and-red clothed teen and sneered, “WHAT did you call me?”

 Kid Flash backed away with hands in defense, “Easy fella,” he stuttered while keeping his distance. “It wasn’t personal.”

 Shadow’s eyes narrowed on the superhero before he huffed, “He’s the faker, not me.”

 Kid Flash looked back at Raven wearily, but she gave him the hint to drop it. She started with introductions, “Kid Flash, meet Shadow.” She glanced at the ebony hedgehog and pointed at the spandex-wearing teen. “Kid Flash visits Jump City once in a while and helps us sometimes.”

 Looking back at Kid Flash, she dawned on their last encounter, the robbery fight against Plasmas and some others, not long ago. She remembered Kid Flash sweeping Jinx off her feet and wordlessly taking her to get cleaned up, and honestly, Raven couldn’t blame her; both girls were drenched in Plasmas’ slime after the heroines worked together to bring the monster down. Raven for one, could attest to how gross that moment was, and given that Jinx took pride in her beauty, there was no telling of her reaction if she stayed.

 In speaking of Jinx, she wasn’t with Kid Flash right now as usual. Raven’s brow quirked. “Where’s Jinx?”

 The speedster pointed out to the city. “She’s hanging with the Titans East. Bumblebee is still getting that stuff out of her hair. I wasn’t staying there for long… There’s no telling if she’d bring down the house.”

 Literally, Raven mentally added.

 A fond smile drew over the speedster’s face. I actually came to check on Sonic; he’s got a long road to recovery after that fight. He looked around the room, lost to recent events. “Where is everyone?”

 Raven’s passive eyes hardened and her monotone picked up. “Slade’s back, and the others are on separate missions. We’re trying to find him before he gets his hands on something beyond his control.”

 Sky-blue eyes quirked in confusion to that. “Sonic’s with them too?”

 Raven shrugged. “He got his rest. There’s no sense in keeping a hyperactive hedgehog here.”

 Kid Flash took this in and nodded. He turned to Shadow, who apparently was giving him a death stare. “What?”

 The Ultimate Lifeform glared at him. “So you’re a speedster too.” He scoffed, “and here I thought Sonic was my only rival.”

 The teen held up his hands again, “Woah, I wouldn’t say rivals. I’m more--” He stopped mid-sentence and gaped at the hedgehog. “Wait… you’ve matched Sonic’s speeds??” His sudden threw Shadow off, the emo having little time to register the kid invading his space. “How fast were you going?!”

 Shadow, for once, stammered and tried to find the words to say. “I-- uh-- it’s—uh…” It took all of Raven’s strength to not chuckle and anger the dark being more. Shadow shook off the shock and answered, “he may have tied you, but I have won several times.” He threw another menacing glare and warned, “and my top speeds are none of your concern.”

 Kid Flash leaned closer and grinned, “Think you can beat me?”

 Shadow scoffed. “Don’t patronize me.”

 That’s it. Raven stood up and faced the boys. “Shadow, you’re in no condition to run. Go back to your room or I will make you.” Before Shadow could object, she faced Kid Flash, “and if you’re staying, could you order some pizza for us? I’ll pay for it.”

 The speedster grinned and did a quick stretch. “It’s fine. Sonic already treated me when I was saving you guys, so it’s my turn. I’ll be back in a flash.”* A yellow blur followed his words as he left the Tower out to the city.

 Raven turned back to Shadow and the two did another ‘glaring contest.’ Shadow eventually yielded and muttered as he left to his room. Raven seated herself and caught up with what she missed on the cameras. Great, she ran a hand along her face, now I have two to babysit.

 *Easter Egg: Flash’s slogan

[thisyearingaming]

1997 - This Year in Gaming

Muggins here was born in ‘97, and can’t really remember much of it, natch. But there were some good things released this year - I’ve played every one of these, and have missed so many more.

Diablo - Windows, January 3rd

We start with dungeon-crawl-em-up and well-loved out of season April Fool’s Joke, Diablo. I’ll be totally honest - I don’t like Diablo that much. It’s absolutely fine, I just can’t get into it. The writing, setting and characters are all very good especially since this year only marks the beginning of games being seen as a bit more adult and intelligent. Check out this gameplay from Hour of Oblivion on YouTube, and marvel at the faux-Scottish accent on Griswold the blacksmith.

Mario Kart 64 - Nintendo 64, February 10th

Compared to its more recent versions, Mario Kart 64 is a veritable bloody relic of the past - solid controls and a quirky style mean it’s still a crowd pleaser to this day, but you’d be hard pressed to find anyone right now that would die on the hill of it being their favourite single-player racing experience. It’s also got some of the deepest, impenetrable lore in any medium known to the human race - why exactly is Marty the Thwomp locked up here?

Blast Corps - Nintendo 64, February 28th

February’s position as most boring month of the year is shaken up a bit by having a uniquely designed Rare game slammed into its 28-day long face. Blast Corps is the puzzle-action game where you take control of several vehicles to destroy homes and buildings in order to prevent a nuclear warhead exploding in the coolest incarnation of Cold War politicking ever seen in a video game. Calling Blast Corps a “hidden gem” these days is like calling Celeste a hidden gem - it impresses nobody and makes you look like a dick. 

Turok: Dinosaur Hunter - Nintendo 64, March 4th 

The N64 was home to a surprisingly large number of above-average shooters despite its muddy graphics and small cartridge space - Turok is one of these, a great FPS game where you shoot the SHIT out of dinosaurs. Brett Atwood of Billboard said it was like Doom and Tomb Raider mixed - Doom Raider, if you will. I say it isn’t - there’s no demons, and there’s no polygonal breasts to poke dinosaurs’ eyes out with! 

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night - Sony PlayStation, March 20th

What is a retrospective? A miserable little pile of opinions. I’ve only recently played through SotN for the very first time on a TOTALLY LEGITIMATE copy with a CRT filter. Bloody good (geddit?) game, that takes the repetition of its predecessors, improves on it in basically every conceivable way, and combines it with special effects and graphics that even 23 years later had me going “ooh, that looks quite good!” Symphony’s music and audio design are wonderfully paired with a deeply enjoyable experience that’ll have you saying “mm, maybe just one more room?”

Tekken 3 - Sony PlayStation, March 20th

Also releasing from the Land of the Rising Sun that day was Tekken 3, which many believe is still one of the best fighters ever made. Tekken 3′s combat is so fast and responsive that it’s better than some games made today. T3 is also the best and easiest way to knock seven shades of absolute shite out of your friends without risking a massive head injury or a trip to the headmaster’s office... where you could also challenge him, but only if he plays as my favourite Not-Guile-or-Ken character in gaming, Paul. 

Sonic Jam - Sega Saturn, June 20th

The moment Sega realised that re-packaging old Mega Drive games would net them serious cash - although unlike later collections, this is a strictly Sonic affair, and has a neat little 3D world to run around in as a sort of hub world. Sonic X-Treme proved that Sonic Team would have to work hard at getting the fastest thing alive into 3D space properly: Jam is the sort of test ground for it too. It features some genuinely good emulation work for 1997, although it’s basically the gaming equivalent of going round to your grandparents at Christmas only for them to give you the exact same gifts you got in 1991, 1992 and 1994 but wrapped in a bow to make you think it’s different. What are you lookin’ at, you little blue devil?

Star Fox 64 - Nintendo 64, June 30th

So there’s this German company, right, called StarVox. Nintendo look at Europe and say “shit, we don’t want another lawsuit... after all, we’ve done three this year!”. So they give us in the PAL region the exciting title of Lylat Wars which as far as I know means absolutely fucking nothing in the context of the game. They’re still called Star Fox in-game too so what was the point? Anyway, fun 3D shooter with graphics that’ll make you do a barrel roll off the sofa and onto the power button to make the brown and green blurs a little easier on the eyes. Hello 2007, I’ve come back to make old references with you!

Carmageddon - Windows, July 30th

The game so scary it was BANNED in the UK! More like the game so fucking shit it was banned. Carmageddon is so deeply boring to play on PC that I can only imagine that Stainless Games made it tasteless by 90s standards simply to ramp up demand - much like another game we’ll be covering soon. 

Herc’s Adventures - Sony PlayStation, July 31st

“And they said Kratos was the best hero? Shish... they got it wrong, sister! Hercules is clearly better... he even has a coconut weapon.” A surprisingly fun overhead action game that most people only know for... well, I’ll just embed it.

Mega Man X4 - Sony Playstation, August 1st

A few years ago I tried playing every Mega Man game there is - I gave up at X3 because I was getting bored. Even still, Mega Man bores me - but at least the level design is good. Stay away from the Windows port. Pictured: me in the background yawning.

GoldenEye 007 - Nintendo 64, August 25th 

The name’s Intro. Overused intro which I also managed to fuck up twice through the deeply editable medium of text. GoldenEye is like the Seinfeld of console shooters - playing it nowadays you’re unlikely to be amazed but holy shit there’s some absolute greatness in this game. Every sound and every piece of music in GoldenEye is permanently seared into my brain - sometimes I’ll just hear Facility or Frigate in my head alongside the door opening sound and the gentle PEW of the PP7. I mean come on, fucking listen to this and tell me Grant Kirkhope isn’t cool as all hell.

LEGO Island - Windows, September 26th

The first open world experience I ever had was LEGO Island. It’s still quite good today, utterly deranged animation from the likes of the Infomaniac and Brickster - a cautionary tale for children that giving pizza to high-profile criminals is disastrous for the human LEGO race. 

Fallout - Windows, October 10th

War never changes, but franchises do. Fallout’s legendary status in the industry is exemplified in how different it feels. Yes, we had the game Wasteland nine years prior, but until September 97 there was nothing quite like Fallout. From the chilling introduction sequence showing the ruins of the United States to the tragic ending, Fallout is an exercise in pure human misery with the brightest spots of hope it can possibly muster thrown in for good measure. What begins as a tedious isometric point-and-click RPG ends as a minigun-wielding power fantasy, before your entire worth is stripped from you at the finish line. You have 500 days to find a water chip before it’s too late, but you’re constantly being fought by terrifying Super Mutants, irradiated animals, and the biggest monster of all - humanity. See what I did there? If anything, humanity in Fallout’s setting would be the greatest unifying force possible against the horror of the outside world. But how is it? It’s dull, it’s sluggish, and it’s really hard to get into even if you’re already a fan - but push through that and it’s worthwhile to see exactly how far the series got before Todd Howard said “eh fuck it” and had the whole thing dipped into an FEV vat.

Grand Theft Auto - Sony PlayStation, October 21st

To put it simply, the first in the GTA series is now nothing but a novelty. It has an irritating camera, wonky controls, poor graphics and deeply repetitive gameplay. But thank fuck it exists, because without it the Rockstar story may have been very different indeed. It’s quintessential cops and robbers gameplay, spanning across Liberty City, Vice City and San Andreas in one game, but with maps so far removed from their modern incarnations they may as well be named “Not New York, Possibly Bristol and Orange Town”. People really fucking hated Hare Krishnas in the 20th Century, didn’t they?

Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back - Sony PlayStation, October 31

A hard one to talk about, honestly - it’s more Crash and better than the first one. It looks great, and Crash controls so well compared to his first outing. It’ll also keep you playing for 100%, fiendishly addictive and unashamedly difficult. Had a weird cover that moved with your head. 

PaRappa the Rapper - Sony PlayStation, November 17th

Type type type the words into the box! (Type, type, type - uh oh - the box?)

PaRappa is a gorgeously stylised rhythm game about rapping to steal the heart of the girl of your dreams - which involves learning karate, getting your driver’s license, selling bottle caps and frogs, making a cake, desperately trying not to shit yourself, and finally performing live on stage. Every one of its segments is so well-produced that they’d genuinely sell like ghost cookies in this era of shite rap. Notable for producing the greatest Jay-Z backing track ever made.

Sonic R - Sega Saturn, November 18th

Sonic R is absolutely FINE with vibrant textures, interesting levels, neat gimmicks and decent controls. But I’m gonna talk about its fucking AWESOME soundtrack by Richard Jacques and T.J. Davis, an eclectic mix of Europop and New Jack Swing - even thinking about it is bringing tears of absolute joy to my eyes hearing Super Sonic Racing in my head. You’ve got the main theme, Living in the City, Can You Feel the Sunshine, Back in Time, Diamond in the Sky, Work It Out and Number One - all of these are absolute club bangers and genuinely wouldn’t be out of place in a 90s disco. 

Tomb Raider II - Sony PlayStation, November 18th

Lara Croft returns to single-handedly endanger every species on Earth. TR2 is really good, the exploration and puzzle-solving aspects of the first game expanded upon here and the gunplay remaining just as punchy. Lara’s got a fully-functioning ponytail which absolutely boggles the fucking mind - a lot of work went into Lara’s hair for the 2013 reboot, so I can’t imagine the amount of man hours it took to get fluid(ish, come on, it’s the PS1 we’re talking about) hair movements in 1997. 

And really, that’s all I played from 1997. I’ve left out big hitters like Quake II, Gran Turismo and Diddy Kong Racing, but I simply haven’t formed an opinion on them yet. Maybe in a future post. 

Thanks for reading.

[mobius-prime]

232. Sonic the Hedgehog #164

The Darkest Storm (Part Three): Downburst

Writer: Ian Flynn Pencils: James Fry Colors: Jason Jensen

With Naugus and Mogul having teamed up, backed up by both of their respective groups of minions, the Freedom Fighters' task to get the Sword and Crown of Acorns back has just gotten a lot harder. Fiona calls out to Sonic that she wants to finish this quickly, and Sonic takes his chance to quip in Sally's direction that he never disappoints a lady, "present company excluded," a comment which just exasperates her though he merely notes in reply that he's just happy to see her back out in the thick of things once again. Sonic and Elias charge Mogul, distracting him and allowing Sonic to grab the crown off his head, but when he tries to give it back to Elias they're both shocked painfully by a surge of energy from the crown. Mogul gloats that the Source has been permanently corrupted to only respond to his own influence, and Sir Connery, outraged, charges forward to engage Mogul in single combat. I can't stress enough that at this point, someone's weird horse fetish (looking at you, Fry) is on full display, as Connery's clothing is strategically damaged to show off his rippling bicep muscles and the manly glare he gives Mogul as he strains to thrust his sword in his direction. It… lacks even the slightest modicum of subtlety. Sonic tries to rush forward to help, but Mogul traps him in a fist made of rock, ensuring that he and Connery can duel it out one on one. However, it turns out Connery didn't even need Sonic's help anyway, because he's got a cool magic sword and the power of righteousness on his side!

With that, Sir Connery's body disappears in a puff of ash, leaving his empty clothing tatters behind. Merlin sadly informs everyone that he used his own life force as a conduit for the energy surge that was able to destroy the sword and crown at once, eliminating the final remnant of the Source of All from this world. A furious Mogul tries to insist he still holds immeasurable power even without the sword, but a voice suddenly booms out over Knothole from the sky, claiming that it does as well. Eggman's fleet of airships has arrived, and within an instant, they blast every member of the opposing team - Mogul, Naugus, the Destructix, and Uma's children. The Freedom Fighters are left shocked at the sudden and total annihilation of their opposition, and prepare for a battle, but turns out they needn't bother.

Look at it, indeed! You would be a complete fool not to attempt to do so at this very moment, when Knothole is vulnerable and its fighting force is already exhausted. But, of course, if Eggman enacted a sudden and decisive victory over his foes right now, then we wouldn't have a comic, would we? And so, Eggman willingly falls victim to the most fatal of villainous flaws, and leaves, intending to return soon on his own terms when conquering Knothole will actually present him with a bit of a challenge. The Freedom Fighters are left to clean up the mess left behind, and give what's left of Sir Connery a proper burial in Knothole's small cemetery. Elias tries to say something in remembrance, but finds that the grief is a bit too much.

Sonic's words reinvigorate Elias, and he gives an impressive speech on the spot, stating that Knothole and its kingdom will aspire to be as brave as Connery was in his final moments, and that his Sword of Light will be passed down the Acorn line as the new royal heirloom. Man, all this would be way more inspiring if Sir Connery appeared in more than four issues and had any personality traits beyond "medieval-esque knight." Sonic, Merlin, Tails, and Knuckles all walk together, discussing how even without the Ancient Walkers, they still have their three chosen successors - Aurora, Athair, and Merlin himself. Their spirits are raised by the thought, but darker things are going down back in New Megaopolis.

…you know, the Egg Grapes may be horrible, awful torture devices and all, but I can't say I really feel bad for anyone stuck in them right now. Well, maybe Uma's children given that apparently they're all still just acting on instinct from their mother's imprinting, but hell, they threw their lot in with Naugus, so I can't really bring myself to care that much. Eggman leaves the room… which gives Anonymous some time to ruminate. You see, their plan went exactly as they hoped, with the sole exception of Sonic's survival. Eggman is now the ultimate power on the face of Mobius, poised to be able to truly win this war and take over everything. A silhouette reminiscent of Robotnik appears on A.D.A.M.'s screen… and the voice of A.D.A.M. quietly reveals himself to be Anonymous, orchestrating everything while hiding in plain sight. That's right, A.D.A.M. has been Anonymous all along! If this seems kind of out of the blue and like it wasn't really planned from the beginning, well, that's because it wasn't. Apparently Romy Chacon had originally intended for a resurrected Robotnik to be Anonymous, but clearly that didn't pan out, and Ian decided to make it A.D.A.M. instead. Far more interesting for Eggman to be betrayed from within, if you ask me, and furthermore, I'm glad that they haven't actually brought the original Robotnik back permanently. It's not often a series' main villain actually dies for real, only to be replaced by someone even worse - I feel like it would just cheapen things to suddenly bring back the original Robotnik for some more shenanigans.

(Unnamed Story)

Writer: Ian Flynn Pencils: Tracy Yardley! Colors: Josh & Aimee Ray

What? Again?! Yes, just like before, we have another unnamed story! Now, given what the name of the story preceding it in the previous issue was, we can easily deduce that the name of this story was meant to be "Sonic Riders (Part 2 of 2)", but the title never actually appears anywhere in the story itself, so out of principle (and spite) I'm leaving its name blank here. Sonic returns to Knothole after his encounter with the Babylon Rogues, battered and exhausted from having lost his fight with them. Tails and Knuckles are concerned, but he brushes them off, saying only his pride is truly wounded and revealing their plans to attack Knothole tomorrow.

Again, I have to point out how strange and out of nowhere all this is, given that in the game these three only get into Extreme Gear riding in the first place after entering Eggman's competition. Like, Tails just suddenly made some airboards at the exact same time that the Babylon Rogues showed up on boards of their own? Suuure. Well, using them to allow the other Freedom Fighters to keep up with Sonic is a good idea at least. The next morning finds the Rogues waiting in the forest outside Knothole, wondering if Sonic plans to show up, though Jet is certain he won't given how badly they beat him yesterday. However, of course he chooses that moment with Tails and Knuckles in tow, and a furious Jet begins to race with him, planning to trash Knothole purely on principle now and determined to prove that he's the fastest thing alive, not Sonic. The six quickly pair off with their respective foils, with Knuckles and Storm trading punches, Wave and Tails trying to outfly and outsmart one another, and Jet and Sonic focusing on pure speed. And then… it ends! Again with this lack of closure, Ian! The final page even invites readers to "play Sonic Riders on your favorite console" to find out who wins this race, despite such a "race" never taking place in the game.

The good news is that after this arc, Ian seemed to have realized how disappointing and odd these non-adaptions are, and in future issues dropped them in favor of non-canon pre-adaptions called "In Another Time, In Another Place" that essentially act as short ads for upcoming games. These take place, as the name suggests, in an alternate reality much closer to that of the games, and as such aren't considered canon within the preboot universe, thus this blog won't be covering them. That said, as I mentioned before, altered versions of some games are considered to have happened at some point within this universe, such as both Sonic Rush games. Sonic '06 is a particularly interesting case, as while Ian apparently confirmed that it did happen in the preboot 'verse and small references to characters and locations from the game are included in future issues, the very nature of the game's storyline means that everything that happened in it was erased from the timeline regardless. This does mean, however, that Silver, arguably the most important new character to be introduced in said game, exists in this universe, though we won't be seeing him for some issues yet. Don't worry though - when he does appear, he really shines!

[blvckquill]

It is currently 1:21 AM at the time of writing this. What started off as a simple joke is gradually starting to alarm me the more I think about it.

A Message to No One

It was around 11:30 PM on July 23rd, 2 hours before this entire joke or should I say theory would get out of hand. I was watching Brutalmoose’s Televoid series as I had seen a few of my friends into it and wanted to know what it was like for myself. It seemed like a normal series, or as normal as a series can be that secretly has some dark themes to it that become more and more apparent as you continue watching. 

I was about halfway through the series, but there was one video in particular that seemed to have struck a chord in me. It was the episode titled A Message to No One. For the most part my experience with it was, normal and then after a certain point I was hit with a feeling of deja vu. Normally whenever I experience such I brush it off and learn to accept it, these sort of things come naturally to everyone and is bound to happen to a person at least once in their life. And yet for some reason this instance felt... Different.

I had only started watching the series early in the morning and was finally getting around to finishing it last night. I had never seen any of his other videos so why was I getting this feeling? What made things more unsettling for me was (if you haven’t seen any of it, spoilers I suppose) that it happened during a moment that is meant to be unsettling on account of the distortion and static that had happened. I had brought the feeling up in a discord server with a few of my friends, but for the most part just brushed it off and made it out to be a joke. However the jokes I had made along with a friend of mine ( @antiknife ) had really gotten me to start thinking.

What if this was more than some sort of standard deja vu moment?

We had originally joked that a version of me from the future was trapped and was attempting to break the very essence time in order to get me to know that they are trapped somewhere. In this case, a TV or something strange that isn’t a traditional prison since this entire thing was sort of sparked by static and distorted imagery. Perhaps this was me trying to warn myself of something that is yet to happen and is urging me to try and do what I can to stop it or at the very least delay what could be the inevitable.

Keep in mind at the time of saying all this we were making it out to be a joke but I mean... If we were to believe in the theory of the multiverse and what could be possible in other realms of existence, something like that may not be too far off the map.

Enter the Time Break™

Yes the Time Break as referenced in Brian David Gilbert’s Unraveling of the Legend of Zelda Timeline. The very same video in which he mentions that Sonic, yes Sonic the Hedgehog, is in the Time Break.

For a while in this discord server in which this idea was spawned we had joked and mentioned that my “government assigned kin” was Sonic the Hedgehog on account of the multitude of Sonic media I would reference and use for jokes. If we were to take that a step further and say that I was indeed kin with Sonic the Hedgehog one could say that in another version of my life, I too am in the Time Break.

What could something like this mean though? Well stay with me now because there is more to Sonic the Hedgehog than being the fastest thing alive.

Sonic is capable of possessing two traits. Either he is a god or could kill God and this point with everything that’s happened within the span of 3 hours... We should care if there is a difference.

With the combinations of the theory of the multiverse, having the government assign me Sonic as my kin, Sonic being trapped in the Time Break, and the theory of Sonic being some higher level being far too great for any of us mortals to understand. Perhaps, Sonic was trapped in the Time Break due to him being too powerful for anyone or anything that could defeat him, or he was doing it to protect all of us from something far worse. That leads me to the next thread in this blasphemous theory board.

The Live Action Sonic Movie

When the trailer for this movie was first released everyone was in shock. The way our favorite blue hedgehog was portrayed was horrifying from his far too human legs, separated eyes, and even more human teeth. Perhaps all this time, Sonic who was trapped in the Time Break was trying to warn me of this catastrophe, or at the very least try to keep me from seeing what would possibly later haunt me in my own nightmares.

Whatever it was, I wasn’t listening... And this is where it all circles back to Televoid...

The episode of Televoid I had been watching... The one that started all this, A Message to No One, had a central theme that was based around listening. For the longest time some higher being was trying to get my attention, tried to warn me about something terrible that was to come, and what was it that I failed to do? I didn’t listen... I would brush off these thoughts that would randomly come to me as just strange thoughts and nothing else.

It is now 2:00 AM and as I recount the events of the past few hours I wish that I could have been more aware, could have done something... Anything to try and prevent what had happened but alas it’s too late for that...

[crusherthedoctor]

⌛😵 🏡😡 Sonic

Sleep: Since Sonic has enough energy within him to fuel an army, his need to recharge is usually lesser than that of the average person. There have been many occasions where he'll fall asleep for a couple of minutes at most, then wake up full of energy again.

Cue plenty of moments where Tails asks “Didn't you just say you were going for a nap?”, and Sonic answers “Yep, it was a good one!”

Sickness: Due to his unique system, multiplied by his experiences, Sonic has shown a remarkable immunity to a lot of illnesses... except for the common cold, of course. Not that it stops him from doing his daily runs in Green Hill, no matter how much he's interrupted by frequent sneezing.

Also, whenever Sonic has a cold, Amy feels conflicted about it. She feels bad that he's unwell... but also happy that it gives her an excuse to play the role of nurse.

Home: Since he doesn't have a home of his own (being nomadic and all), he spends most of his time at Tails' workshop whenever he needs a place... or an excuse to hang with his little bro.

Realising this, Tails saw fit to install a room for him, tailor made to suit his wants and needs perfectly. He considers the workshop Sonic's house just as much as he considers it his.

Anger: Although Sonic can indeed have a hot temperament, it's nowhere near as bad as many in-universe have been led to believe, and the rumors and exaggerations surrounding it annoy him greatly. (This was inspired by how manuals and sites tends to mention his temper all the time, despite him only showing it off a handful of times in the games proper.)

Know what else he finds annoying? When people express bafflement and/or mockery at him driving a car. He's quick to point out - in the most deadpan tone he can muster - that just because he's the fastest thing alive doesn't mean he's not allowed to enjoy a nice drive. Or in the case of races, it's not like he doesn't believe in a fair competition.

[crimjoyofmuses]

".....Look buddy I don't belong to anyone."

[dxrkblaze]

22 with sonaze? 👀

HOOOO BOY i couldn’t decide whether to make this fluffy or angsty. i chose fluffy bc i caught myself wanting to make a whole fuckin au behind the angsty idea lmfao

22 - “I love you” muffled, from the other side of the door

Sonic swayed on his feet, biting his lower lip in anticipation of a premeditated confession. Perhaps the term “premeditated” didn’t do the situation justice; he didn’t sleep at all the previous night, planning for this very moment. Sonic had lost count of the amount of times he’d rehearsed what he wanted to say, yet he still found himself searching for words at Blaze’s bedroom door. 

Several of their friends were in close proximity, which didn’t help Sonic’s anxiety, but that was to be expected. They were all on vacation with him, and it would have been too suspicious to ask everyone except Blaze to leave the beach house for a bit. It was nearly impossible to get Shadow outside, anyways. So, Sonic gritted his teeth, realizing that everyone who wanted to hear him would do so. The blue blur couldn’t wait any longer; he had to tell Blaze how he felt. It had driven him mad for months. Indeed, the night prior was not the first sleepless night he had endured because of his feelings.

This was Sonic’s opportunity. He knew he couldn’t tell her face-to-face, and a text didn’t seem right. This was his moment, one that he had prepared so rigorously for. So why was he sweating? Why did his throat feel so tight? His hand was shaking as he lifted it to knock on Blaze’s door. The hollow sound his knuckles created seemed to echo throughout the house, attracting his friends’ eyes to his misery.

Oh, fucking hell.

Sonic diverted his gaze to his shoes, forcing a smile to nobody in particular. His fate had been sealed; he couldn’t back out now. For all the brushes with doom he’d had in the past, did the fastest thing alive really find it difficult to talk to a girl? A good friend, nonetheless? Those thoughts raced through Sonic’s mind as he finally eked out a few words.

“Blaze? I know this is kinda’ crazy but,” Sonic paused, nearly choking as his spit was caught in his dry mouth. He heard the doorknob jiggle, and he quickly moved to grab it. “N-no! Uh, just stay in there for a second, please?” The rattling stopped, and Sonic sighed. A small crowd had formed behind him to silently debate his odd behavior. “Listen, uh… we’ve been friends for a long time, yeah?”

A muffled “Mhm!” sounded from the other side.

“And uh… you know I’m not really good with words. But, I, uh… I just kinda’ wanna’ know if you’d wanna’… oh jeez,” he tried to laugh. Another long silence passed before Sonic finally winced, and cut through his planned dialogue to exclaim his point. His entire body tensed, his shoulders digging into either side of his muzzle. “I love you! And I wanna’ know if you feel the same!”

Truthfully, the general reaction behind Sonic was not one he expected. There were no gasps, no shocked whispers, not even a matchmaking cry from Amy. There wasn’t even silence. Sonic heard… snickers? What was so funny about the situation? Sonic grew irritated, and turned around to find Blaze standing in the middle of the crowd, one brow raised as she indifferently drew sips from her morning coffee. 

Sonic was certain his entire head turned red, judging from the sudden rush of heat to his muzzle and ears. He stared Blaze in the eyes simply because he was too shocked to look away. This anticipatory vibe was accidental, of course; Sonic wanted nothing more than to run away at that point. However, Blaze bought it, and finally shook her head with a smirk. She approached Sonic to kiss him on the cheek, conveying her mutual feelings without words. This time, Sonic was met with the expected cheers and coos from his friends. 

Still, the blue blur could barely speak. He looked to Blaze in disbelief. “I thought you were,”

“Silver and I switched rooms after the first night,” Blaze explained, playfully rolling her eyes. She smirked again. “Dork.”

“But-”

Suddenly, the bedroom door swung open to reveal Silver, his hands clasped in awe against his cheek. The sparkles in his eyes were as bright as his smile. “Do you really love me, Sonic?”

Everyone laughed except Sonic, who was still far too embarrassed to move. Blaze leaned in close to his ear. “We’ll talk about it later,” she whispered.

[azurexalacrity]

✪ Fusion.Fall AU: Synopsis ✪

( Alright-y, as for those who still have interest in this or for those I have discussed this with, I know this is long overdue. In fact, I have branched out my Noir!AU before I’ve done this one, even though I thought of this AU first. However, I have played enough of the game to get a proper idea on how I want this blue boi to be in this universe.

As for this Sonic, I am using the Boom version of him. Not only is he a CN show to fit into this universe, but this universe of him makes it all the more easier for me to blend this hedgehog in the story.

BACKSTORY:

Bygone Island was home to the land of bipedal animals known as “Mobians.” It’s a small island way off the coast of Orchid Bay, where the aforementioned “Skull Island” is near. While the fact of a anthropomorphic species hanging around on this dinky piece of land, it doesn’t weird out too many people considering there’s such things as Imaginary Friends, a talking, cowardly dog, and the grim reaper existing.

Sonic and his friends, as well as the rest of the islanders, were living their lives as peacefully as they could (while there can be some Eggman attack here and there, but it wasn’t too dangerous). No one was aware of the upcoming threat approaching the planet.

That is, until one day Tails decided to check on his telescope, and he’s seen something that he’s never seen in his entire life: A huge, green planet coming straight towards them, acting like a second moon to the sky. And, really, Eggman isn’t that far behind to knowing about this too.

Rivalries and constant battle against one another has been cut short due to this planet. Despite their differences and utter dislike towards one another, the hedgehog and the mad scientist began to team up in order to figure out what in the world can they do to stop this thing.

However, it’s far too late.

Green meteorites the size of monster trucks began smashing against the surface of the island, infecting it with toxic slime of Fusion Matter. The village has been in shambles, having some people’s homes containing terra-fusers and creating monsters by the minute. Monsters began attacking the villagers ruthlessly, along with the heroes.

Sonic fought with every fiber of his living being. Every bone in his body ached by every hit and every strain, but he continued to fight until he’s on his last leg. He won’t rest until he’s down for the count and did everything he could.

Unfortunately, his and his friends’ efforts at fighting weren’t successful by any means. There were too many numbers, and the island was becoming more infected as they fought. Due to this, Tails and Eggman then created ships in order to have everyone evacuate.

Not everyone made it, though. Some people were swallowed up by the fusion matter, some were killed, and some were separated in the ships. For the first time in his life, Sonic has become an evacuee and one of the victims of Fuse’s attack.

Thus, he bet on his life to protect others; using his speed to help as many people as he can... Including his beloved friends.

LOCATION:

While it’s odd that he’s not at Orchid Bay in order to have surveillance on the island, he’s at Mount Blackhead to keep a check on the Wilds part of the world. The lost of his home has hit him hard, and thus, he vowed to not only help the people, but the wildlife as well to keep it from being infected.

He’s in the back of the outpost, right where the walkway is to enter Twisted Forest. And yes, as an NPC, he has his own set of missions too.

MISSIONS:

Bye, Gone Island - Nano Mission: Sonic calls you in one at a mission, detailing worrying facts about how the attack on Bygone Island wasn’t only for Fuse to gain land and take it over... It was to also steal the heroes’ identity in order to make more fusions; especially Sonic’s.

For that reason, he is targeted specifically by Fuse, much like Ben with the Omnitrix. For this mission, he was surrounded by monsters, and taken away from the outpost. For this, he has to be rescued at Bygone Island; an Infected Zone.

When finding the fusion portal, Sonic calls in to state that a Fusion Sonic has been formed and telling you to be careful and to take it down. When rescuing Sonic, he becomes an assist to help you take out the fusion. Fusion Sonic’s attacks are faster than other fusions, including giving out drains to your Nanos’ stamina/powers.

When its defeated, you gain your Sonic Nano.

Flower Fiasco: Sonic gives you this mission in order for you to head out to Steam Alley to fight fusion monsters. The reason? Well, he embarrassingly tells you it’s to protect Grim Gardens. He checks in Grim’s store time and again just to get some flowers - Even if some are paranormal.

Beach Day Disaster: You get a message from Sonic, telling you that you need to head to the Infected Zone of Bygone Island to gather snapshots. Not only to see the current state of the island, but for Dexter to observe more closely on its infection.

A Brother’s Letter: Sonic’s request is for you to hand this letter to the Science District. More specifically; at Mojo’s Volcano where Tails is (and hesitantly working with Mojo and Eggman, oh boy. It’s for a good reason, though, as it’s to fight against Fuse). Tails happily reads out the letter and hands out his own letter, saying you should give it to Sonic. When getting it, Sonic appears to be touched as well.

There’s probably gonna be more ideas of missions in the future, but this is what I have for now.

THE FUTURE:

Before the fall of Tech Square, you come across a statue of Sonic’s grinning face. The statue has become decayed and containing little pockets of Fusion Matter. After the fall, it’s been confirmed that Sonic has been missing for quite some time, and has been presumed dead by a couple known NPCs.

Later down the road, you’ll gain this mission to learn more about him and his status:

The Fastest Fusion Alive: A mission in which you learn that Sonic is indeed alive, but not in the greatest of shapes. In fact, he’s been known to have been controlled by Fuse for quite some time, due to the fact of his fusion capturing him.

It’s your duty to fight him first, expel the fusion out of him by doing so, and fighting his fusion. This is the first instance of fighting Fusion Sonic, while the nano mission is the second. You then talk to Sonic, who’s then confused and weary of his surroundings. He’s been finally saved and to be soon in recovery from the fusion infection - And from Fuse.

There will probably be more to add later, but this is all for now!~ )

[nuravity]

Eri ran up to Ochako, really excited to show her something. "Uraraka! Uraraka! I found a funny talking doggy!" She was pulling on the arm of a spikey blue creature. "Eri, I'm a hedgehog, not a dog..." the blue creature said, "So you're Uraraka? I'm Sonic, the fastest thing alive! You know where they sell chili dogs around here?"

Ochako had been reading in the common room before being surprised at Eri rushing over to her and she placed the book aside to pay attention to the girl. "A doggie?"

She was then, surprised again when a blue hedgehog was pulled along. "Huh? I know him! I mean...I've heard of him I think." The hedgehog introduced himself and she nodded to confirm that she was indeed Uravity. "I heard about you in the news. Are you a hero in training?" she asked with slight curiosity.

To his question though, she paused. "Not that I know of. I think maybe some of the restaurants here sell it but I'm not sure."

[zappuellightninrod]

Sonic Forces: Cosmic Illusions

Death Egg Sentinels rampaged through the city, destroying buildings and hurting innocent civilians. Shadow the hedgehog had been sighted by the Resistance, and now that Sonic the hedgehog was with them, they could finally get to the bottom of why he was working for the mad Doctor. Most of the Resistance members were busy fighting off the armies of the evil doctor, while others were helping civilians. However, two people were investigating something else. Those  two people were Miles "Tails" Prower, and a version of Sonic the hedgehog from another dimension. Or timeline. Or whatever/whenever he's from.

Standing now in between several destroyed buildings was the smaller Sonic the hedgehog. Not seen as the same powerhouse as this dimension's, though still a good soldier during these times of need. He held a confrontational stance as Tails ran up behind him.

"Wait up, Sonic, I can't go as fast as you! Even if you're not the fastest Sonic here!" Tails whined, catching up to the smaller hedgehog. He panted, catching his breath as he looked back to the Azure hedgehog, who's were narrowed as he stood in front of a familiar dark figure.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't the little pint sized hedgehog and his even weaker fox friend." Infinite said.

"You… You're that guy that was with Eggman in Green Hill!" Tails shouted.

"I suppose I am. The doctor did say something about you defeating his Egg Dragoon. No doubt you two were the ones I thought I sensed."

Sonic's fist clenched as he looked at Infinite's chest. The magenta gemstone he wore with such bravado was a sight all to familiar to him. He took a single step back, readying himself to jump at the jackal. He made his move, rushing forwards and jumping as high into the air as he could. However, this dimension seemed to have vastly different physics then that of his home. His jump couldn't reach the floating mobian. Not that it would have mattered much anyways, as he glided out of the way. He lowered himself in between Sonic and Tails before warping close to Tails in an instant. Tails shouted, as Infinite grabbed him by the throat. He was lifted upwards in Infinite's grasp.

"So, this is the sidekick of Sonic the hedgehog. Pathetic. Just like him." Infinite muttered in a threatening tone.

Sonic turned himself around and jumped before turning into a ball mid-air and revving up. When he hit the ground, he dashed towards Infinite at breakneck speed. Not that it mattered to Infinite. His own speed outmatched the Sonic of this dimension. He was more than capable of dodging this attack. He moved quickly to the let, Tails still in his grip. As Tails gasped for air, he got the sensation of lacking oxygen. Much faster than normally possible, almost as if they were being torn from his lungs forcefully. Infinite chuckled.

"Do you feel that? That breathless feeling? The cold embrace of death? It's terrifying isn't it? You should be thankful I'm merely giving you the sensation of suffocation. There are many, many other ways I could be killing you right now."

As Tails listened, his life actually began flashing before his eyes. His mind quickly traveled through his time on Westside Island, his first big adventure with Sonic, him facing the Egg walker, his time on the ARK, his time in space fighting the Metarex, Eggman's interstellar amusement park, the Lost Hex…. Everything was flashing before his eyes. Would this really be where he died?

As Sonic revved up another attack, Infinite spoke, "Oh… What's this? A fallen loved one? Hahahaha, how quaint."

With a single gesture, he threw Tails to Sonic, hitting him and knocking him down. Oxygen returned to Tails' lungs as the fox gasped for air. He surprisingly caught his breath quickly, almost as if he was never actually being choked in the first place. The both of them got to their feet as Infinite floated high into the air. Classic Sonic got into another battle stance, though, this time he was looking around for things he could use. Brute force wasn't something that was viable here. He needed strategy.

"Do the two of you want to know how Eggman was able to amass this army? How the likes of Zavok and Chaos joined our ranks despite being deceased? Why the brooding hedgehog decided to band together with the doctor?" Infinite monologued, offering an answer to the two.

Tails blinked for a second. Shadow was sighted in the city during this attack, and with Sonic here, they could at least capture him and try to get an answer out of him. Then again, Shadow's crafty and could escape. And from what Infinite was talking about earlier with letting Sonic live in their first encounter, he does seem to let his enemies go off easy, even though he could just kill them.

"I was kind of curious how you managed that. And you do seem like the kind of guy who likes telling everyone about his evil plans, so I'm all ears." Tails said with a hint of sarcasm in his voice. A trait he began picking up from Sonic in recent times.

Infinite gave a light chuckle, "Oh,I'd suggest you speak to me with a lot more respect, child. After all, I'm about to bring back someone you never thought you'd see again…"

With the snap of his fingers, a purple and pink mist formed underneath Infinite's floating figure. Digital sparks began flickering around the mist as an entity began to form from the Ruby Mist. Sonic recognized the mist from his home dimension, back from the Titanic Monarch. Tails took precautions, ready for some past villain to come forth from the mist. However, his eyes widened when he began to see who it actually was.

Sonic did not recognize the entity, and could only guess that it was another villian from this universe. Though, they certainly didn't look like a villain. He heard Tails gasp as the figure began to make itself seen. He glanced back to Tails, expecting a look of horror. But he did not get that.

Instead, perched upon Tails' face was a look of disbelief. But not the type of disbelief after seeing a bad guy crawl up out of the rubble being convinced they were dead. No, this disbelief was… a very wide mixture of emotions. Sorrow. Regret. Hope. Love. And many more. To say Sonic was confused would be an understatement. Tials only managed to whisper one word, and one word alone out of astonishment.

"Cosmo…?"

Indeed, standing before the two of them was the green haired girl from space. The very same one that died by Tails' hand. Her blue eyes lit up in the fog. She blinked a few times, rubbing the mist out of her eyes, though she still seemed to be flickering in glitches, "Tails…? Is that you…?"

A drop of water was heard in Sonic's ear. He looked back to where it sounded and saw tears flowing down Tails' muzzle. Sonic grew defensive, looking back to the girl with a determined face, read to protect Tails if this girl mean him harm. Tails however, made a step forwards in front of Sonic, going past his defenses of him.

"Cosmo… Is it…. Is it really you…?" Tails muttered. This couldn't be real. This had to have been some sort of illusion. Cosmo's been dead for so long and Infinite just seemed to just bring her back from the dead.

"Yes, Tails… it's me." Cosmo said, stepping forwards form the mist. Tails broke down, falling to his hands and knees. He began crying and shouting at the top of his lungs.

"Oh, Cosmo, I'm so sorry! I-I didn't mean to shoot you! I didn't' want to do it! Everyone else forced me to! But I did it! I did it and I killed you!" Tails shouted. Sonic's eyes grew wide, looking back up to the green haired girl. She took a few more steps forwards, kneeling down next to him and lifting his his chin.

"Tails… You don't have to worry about that. I forgive you. I made you shoot me… And we're all alive because of it." he said, giving him the gentlest of smiles. The smile he loved so dearly. Tails sniffed before wrapping his arms around her and bawling into her chest. Within his tears of joy, he heard her heartbeat. She felt so soft. So warm. So real. This had to have been some sort of power of the Phantom Ruby. Could it alter reality? Could it bring back the dead? Could it have time travel properties? It didn't matter. None of it mattered. He had Cosmo in his hands, and for that he could never be more thankful.

Of everything Sonic had seen in this strange future dimension, this was by far the one he did not get. It was clear that Tails loved this girl, and that he did something bad to her, but what was it? He killed her? Why would he do such a thing? A lot of context was necessary for him. Though, he supposed that maybe it was worth asking for later on, just in case he and his friends would run into any similar characters in the future. In spite of the heartwarming moment, he looked back up at Infinite, who had not moved from his spot.

"How touching. A reunion of the dead." He said, in a deathly tone. Classic Sonic clenched his fists, ready to fight again. Maybe this Cosmo character could help them out in some way. Not that it would make a lot of sense why he could bring an ally to them. He glanced back down at her hugging Tails. Her face was visible to Sonic, which allowed him to see something shocking.

"Don't worry, Tails…" She said, her eyes opening wide to reveal they had turned from blue to red, "We'll be together forever… I promise."

She sported a toothy grin as she spoke. From her sleeve, a knife jotted out. Classic Sonic's eyes went wide. He was about to rush against her, to save Tails. But then something unexpected happened.

A bright flash of light shone next to them, and a good kick sent the both of them flying. Cosmo landed further than Tails did. Cosmo's red eyes and sharp teeth faded away, back to her original appearance. The both of them got up and looked at who had struck them. Standing before them was the all too familiar sight of Shadow the hedgehog.

"You!" Infinite shouted. Shadow merely humphed in his direction. Not far behind was the Sonic the hedgehog of this dimension, rushing forwards, stopping on a dime at the intersection of destroyed buildings.

"Shadow! I got here as fast as I co-" Sonic's eyes widened when he saw Cosmo laying on the floor not to far off from Tails

"Wait, Cosmo?!" He looked at her and then back up at Infinite. Thanks to Shadow's exposition earlier, he knew exactly what was going on. He growled at Infinite, "You!"

"Ah, yes, hello hedgehogs. I suppose you all know exactly what's going on?" Infinite said, with a smirk under his mask.

" don't have time for this." Shadow exclaimed. In a bright flash of light, he vanished.

Tails, completely surprised by everything that just happened quickly turned back to Cosmo, to make sure she was alright. As she was getting up, Shadow teleported right on top of her, his jet boot stomping on her chest. Tails' eyes widened.

"Cosmo!"

"Tai-" was the last thing Cosmo could say, reaching her hand out to him, before it fell. Her face went from complete horror to shocked and calmed. She ceased to move. A bright flash of light came from Shadow's shoe which firmly separated her life and now death. A burning hole lied there as Shadow removed his foot from her. He gave a hateful glance back to Infinite.

"Shadow!" Sonic shouted. The other Sonic's eyes widened, unsure how to take such violent actions from the black hedgehog. This universe's Sonic looked back up to Infinite with a hateful glare,"You're going to pay for this."

"Oh? Am I? And here I thought I was just reuniting a pair of lovers." Infinite said, fully knowing the dark twist he meant.

"I ought to grab you by your hair and beat you to the ground like I did before." Shadow threatened. Tails sat on his knees, tears falling from his eyes as he looked upon Cosmo's dead corpse.

"Well, that will be hard to do, now with the power of the Phantom Ruby. Besides, you no doubt will be having your own trouble." Infinite said.

"And what would that be?" Shadow said, completely expecting an onslaught of robots or more illusions by Infinite. What he got however, was much different.

Tails' teeth gritted together, a he looked on Shadow in anger. He shouted at the top of his lungs as he ran towards Shadow, straight up punching him in the face. This caught Shadow off guard to say the least. He stepped back from the recoil a bit before Tails tried continue his onslaught of anger.

"You killed her! She was here! She was alie! And you killed her!" Tails shouted, tears in his eyes.

Both Sonic's eyes widened, but only this dimension's sonic spoke, "Tails! No! You don't understand!"

Infinite chuckled, deciding that now was the time to take his leave. He zoomed off across the cityscape at breakneck pace. Shadow got a glance of this and shouted, "No! He's getting away!"

"I don't care who's getting away! You're going to pay for that! For killing Cosmo!" Tails shouted in rage, continuing his attempt at a beat down on Shadow., which might;ve done some damage if Shadow wasn't good at blocking.

"We don't have time for this!" Shadow shouts, as he deflected one of Tails' attacks and quickly karate chopped Tails' neck. Tails' eyes rolled into the back of his head, and dropped to the floor.

"Tails!" Sonic shouted. Both Sonic's ran up to Tails, checking up on him

"Relax. I only knocked him unconscious…" Shadow reassured. He observed how far Infinite got away. Had Tails not attacked him so suddenly, they might have actually been able to beat him.

The corpse of Cosmo began to deteriorate similarly to the Shadow replica Shadow had destroyed sparked Sonic to speak to Shadow, "You could've just said, 'Tails, look out, it's a trap!' you know. Didn't have to go and explode that illusion's chest in."

"He wouldn't have believed me for a second. Had I not intervened, she would've killed him." Shadow explained.

Sonic was about to say something to rebuttal Shadow, but he was stopped by his counterpart, who was nodding to signify Shadow was right. The taller hedgehog merely sighed, looking back to Tails. He picked him up and the three hedgehogs began walking back to base.

"You're explaining and apologizing to him when he wakes up."

"Understood."

[game84cube]

My Opinions on the Sonic Movie Trailer

Okay, I guess I better say something about this movie before I lose my credibility in the Sonic community. I saw the trailer at school and everyone was talking about how weird it was on campus. I loved it at first sight, since I thought Sonic was gonna look WAY worse. Anyway, let's go over the pros and cons.

Pros:

- The speed. They knew what they were doing with Sonic and his speed effects. I mean it makes sense, what with the people from Fast and Furious.

- That Spin Dash! Sonic's iconic move was displayed amazingly in that trailer and his strength was on full display. Also when he just plopped into his little hideout in the forest and he was that fuzzball, it looked great!

- Jim Carrey as Dr. Robotnik. I get what they're doing. This is an origin story. Robotnik is gonna deteriorate into the classic crazy villain we all know him as. That ending shot proved it. But yeah. He was clearly not fat enough, but he isn't quite...egged out yet. Sort of a Kintobor thing before Robotnik/Eggman. My dad has issues with it, but I think it's fine. Plus he's got good material as well. Sassy and smart. That's how I like my Eggs.

- The acting. Marsala is giving it his all, and he sure has experience in this. I imagine he's gonna be a good focal point of the movie since title characters in these movies are NEVER the focus but are there to say that it is indeed a titled character's movie. I think Tim will be fine. A little snarky to play off of Sonic as well. Honestly I loved that bit with the "That's not your child in that bag?" This was also a good reminder that Sonic is a teenager. Good move. I forget who's playing Ann, but she seems fine. No comment yet. And then we have the Hedgehog himself. Ben Schwartz, I tip my blue spiky hat to you! You know just how to make Sonic sound like...well... SONIC! That cockiness is perfect. The voice is natural, and I want MORE! I'm sure they got some good lines for him (and some bad ones but that's inevitable sadly)

- The animation in general. Say what you will about the design, but in motion, everything looks awesome! It flows, it doesn't look cheap, and the mech designs look incredible. The effects are well integrated and seem like they're unintrusive on reality. I like it. And really, Sonic looks good in some shots, especially doing what he does best. I'm so happy they got Sonic looking cool when on the move. If they failed at that, the whole thing would be a complete failure.

-The Easter Eggs and nods! Listen to the voice of the Commander of the military again. Now imagine that voice saying something like... "Sonic Adventure 2, Hero Side Story: Farewell Sonic, Forever." Tell me that isnt the same guy! That's an amazing Easter Egg. Also I hear one of the guys in the meeting voiced Grounder in Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog. Also cool! The pike of shoes in Sonic's hideout was a neat touch. He was looking for some good new shoes. Something tells me those Nikes ain't gonna last through the movie since they ain't frictionless. I also noticed something really cute they pulled off. When Sonic did that Fitbit joke? Looking at his wrist condescendingly? Sound familiar? Almost idle? Sonic 2 idle animation perhaps? All that's missing is him tapping his t- WAIT! Yep, that's another thing I think when I think Sonic. The classic impatient toe tap. They got his attitude DOWN and I love it! And! They remember something I'm so happy about! HE'S 90'S AS FUCK!!! Sonic listened to Gangsta's Paradise on a cassette tape! That song is from the 90's! They got it! Sonic is not a modern boi. He is so lost in the last decades and that's why I love him. That old fashioned nature? That's what makes him more timeless to me.

- Check that hair. They got his hair right. Good. That's it. Sonic is also very defined by the classic shape of his hair.

- The Ring. Okay, hear me out. Yes, we're more familiar with Rings being used as a shield to prevent Sonic from dying from a hit. Um, did y'all forget the Giant Ring at the end of the level in Sonic 1? Or the Flicky's Ring in 3D Blast/Flickies Island? It's just a portable version of that. I like the spin on it, okay? I'm sure it also protects Sonic like in the SatAM cartoon. Im just glad Rings are in the movie at all.

Cons:

- Elephant in the room, Sonic's overall design philosophy. I feel like there were two butting heads at the studio trying to decide how realistic to make Sonic look. They apparently compromised at "Make him anthropomorphic and give him human facial features including human teeth." Yeah, the teeth and eyes are my issue, and some coloring issues as well (I get that hedgehogs usually have white bellies, but Sonic has always had a tan belly, since he doesnt walk on all fours. Plus he needs to be a darker shade of blue.) The features all too human just kind of take away from what was meant to be more real. If they gave him sharper canine teeth, that would be an improvement, because that would be more animalistic. Also, I like how some people design Movie Sonic with a white tuft of fur between his eyes to make that classic illusion that his eyes are connected like the old days. (Actually looking back, I think Sonic's eyes were connected on accident before but they stuck with the design. Sort of an artist's idea of eye design in the old days. If he was to be created today, his eyes might be separated) I also need something to really come out of Sonic with his face. EXPRESSIONS AND PERSONALITY! You know, that thing Sonic was known for aside from his speed? That face is not very expressive and it leaves the emotions behind the delivery of the lines feeling flat. Perhaps a more defined brow for that redo, thanks. Otherwise, I have no complaints. The lack of gloves is odd, but again, this is most likely an origin story, so he doesnt have the gloves YET. I am glad that he has proper paws with the pads on his palms instead of creepy human hands. Also claws that he probably cuts/files/chews off himself so they're more like fingernails. Solid enough I guess. And the furriness of it all as well as the dropping quills? Eh, it makes sense. Plus it almost makes the rest of his body seem cuddly. I'm just not down with the rest of it.

-The music choice. Okay, I never heard Gangsta's Paradise in my life. From what I hear it makes no sense to have it have anything to do with Sonic. Now, maybe it was the only cassette he could find, since that boombox looks secondhand and so is the tape, obviously. However, if I were to choose a song for the trailer? I have one option. All I Want by Offspring! Think about it. The dates line up. It's a fast paced rock song. It's rebellious and against the system, like Sonic is in the movie apparently (yeah I didnt get that whole "delinquent" bullshit from the trailer, did you? He just seems like Sonic to me in terms of his actions,) and it was used in a SEGA game! It's from Crazy Taxi! Come on, that's PERFECT!

- the Flash lightning. Seriously? Is that the only thing Hollywood can think of when it comes to showing someone is fast? Come on, get your heads out of your asses. It's so easy. Modern Sonic has been more compared to the element of WIND! Tornadoes, Mach Cones, Sonic Wind, all that stuff. Sonic never really messed with electricity, so bleh.

- This isn't a pro or a con, but I really wanna know this. Will we see the Tornado? Don't forget that the Tornado is Sonic's plane. He just has Tails fly it when he wants to ride the wings. I feel like they could have had Sonic use the Tornado in a cool air battle scene but get shot down (because the Tornado kinda sucks since it always gets shot down, but it's iconic to me) since Sonic isn't exactly "a hell of a pilot" and THEN finds the Warp Ring inside. I dunno, thought it'd be cool. Look, Tim just met a 3 foot, blue, talking hedgehog that runs really fast and eats chili dogs. (please remember the chili dogs) Hedgehogs on planes wouldn't be that farfetched that day, would it?

- Some writing just felt off, but some can be explained. Let's start with everyone's FAVORITE scene...to wreck. The infamous "Uhhh...meow?" Here's my take. Yes, stupid, but what if he had no idea what to do? What if Sonic was just in his head going "What sounds do hedgehogs make? What sounds do hedgehogs make? Quick, say something, stupid!" And when he said it, probably something in his head was screaming "Dont say something stupid, stupid!" Also, I just didn't laugh at the "Smells like body spray and an old ham sandwich" line. I was like, Sonic, shut up. The joke was sold. Don't ruin it.

- Why is it the law where every live action movie with a CGI talking animal (that they didn't know about before you bring up Detective Pikachu, Christopher Robin, or even Peter Rabbit) must have the main character and the CGI character scream at each other? Sonic wouldn't freak out (unless he was more afraid of the gun and was kind of unsure how to react. Also great job dodging the tranq dart, oh Fastest Thing Alive)more than likely he'd be trying to talk his way out of this or just run away with a face like 😐😳 "I'm SO busted!" Just saying there was a better way to do that aside from the cliche.

- Robotnik, why did you try to taste the quill? You dont know where he's been. Yeah, yeah, I get it. Cool and Lickable. Lol. Pretty sure typos shouldn't be legitimized.

- Quicksilver? Not in my series he ain't. Oh... wait. Yeah. The whole stopping time thing. Eh, it's been done. Cool all the same, but again, done before. I appreciate Sonic's spin on it though, playing around like a teenager would. I dig it.

-Save your planet? Like...as in you're just an alien? I dunno, plus how do you know you have to save the planet? I'm chalking THAT up to "this is a trailer and probably wont appear in the final movie the same way."

- Did they REALLY have to make him say "Gotta go fast"? Again, probably just for the trailer, but really?

In conclusion, I have no hope for the movie. Can't be disappointed if you dont expect anything. Sort of my take on his design at first. I thought he was gonna look like COMPLETE garbage, but some shots look great, like when he was explaining that he had to save the planet? The lighting and such looked good for his face when the camera was on him. And again, the movie looks much better in motion. Yeah, I still have issues, but that's because I love Sonic. I love the characters and I want the best for the series. I care about the games that have been with me since my near infancy. They have fan service but it feels like you gotta be a crazy fan like myself to get the references, so it's lackluster because of it.

Sonic deserves a great movie! I just hope they impress me with something HUGE!

[isakthedragon]

A Dragon Sized Adventure Chapter 41

Chapter 41: The Space Groove

*Crash and all of the other heroes finally enter the Space Terrarium. There are plenty of windows that look out into space here. Most of the walkways here are just scaffolding that is hanging from the ceiling, letting space be freely seen throughout the rest of it (like the Death Egg). There also plenty of machinery and screens about that seem to check the chip itself, although messing with them does nothing, so the might be here for decoration.*

*The doors opens like what you would see on a sci-fi set, with them sliding into the wall.*

Sonic: “Aha! I see we got the futuristic doors here. It must mean we are in the last section, the furthest we can go! Eggman always makes it so obvious.”

Shadow: “Well, Sonic, most of our adventures seem to end in space, somehow.”

Von Clutch asides to Pasadena: “See, I told you they do self-referential humor. They do know they are video game characters.”

Crash: “So then Eggman and Cortex are probably going to be fought here? Sweet!” *He smiles and takes the lead…*

—–

Level 96: Space Walk

Crates: 157

Time Trial

Sapphire: 1:30.00

Gold: 1:25.00

Platinum: 1:20.00

Mutants to Save: 6

Helping Partner: Silver

Badniks: ‘Alien’ Lab Assistant Pawn: Barely passing not being a direct copy of ‘that’ creature, this jet black Lab Assistant Pawn tends to pop the top of its head open and fires a ray gun shot from it’s mouth. Shield Lab Assistant Pawn: They stand on the narrow walkway, shoving their shields to push you backwards. They are probably no match to just being ‘thrown’ away into a NITRO crate.

Robots: Robot Walker: Strange little contraptions that just walk around. Don’t touch them, unless you want to be atomized. Sparky Tentacle-bot Units: Annoying little robots that move around with electric tentacles. They will raise and lower them to try and surprise you as you attack. Slap-E: Cortex’s robot servants that will slap anyone who gets close. They are also very melodramatic.

Mutant: Darth Chimpandog: A Chimpanzee + Dog hybrid that wears a Darth Vader helmet, oxygen pack and some futuristic samurai armor. It climbs around aimlessly until it spots you, which will cause it to swing about and use its laser sword to cut you. Znu: Strange little balls of nightmare that only wear underwear. They work for Cotex since there are few Grimlies about. If you don’t attack them, they will use their flashlight as a laser shot to hurt you.

*Cortex appears as a hologram with Uka-Uka.* “ *Sigh.* So the end is in sight. Gather the last 5 crystals and once again, you will have defeated me. Whatever.” *He leaves.*

Uka-Uka is confused on how to go on. “I… um… we will destroy you? Hmm, that doesn’t sound right… Damn it! Cortex! You threw off my groove!” *He disappears too.*

Well, that was strange. But, welcome everyone, to your second home: SPACE!!! (Echo) … Too much? Aw, well. Anyway, Crash and Silver are entering the dangerous workings of the Death Head and must avoid the various traps that line the walkways like pistons, shrink rays, and flipping platforms (and be careful touching the sides of these unless you want to get burned and have cooked bandicoot and hedgehog for dinner, which is coincidentally what Eggman’s eating :P ). And try not to fall off the sides of the walkways either unless you want to experience a full vacuum.

Achievement Unlocked: One Small Step for Bandicoots and Hedgehogs...

—–

Level 97: Rocket and Roll

Crates: 125

Time Trial

Sapphire: 1:35.00

Gold: 1:30.00

Platinum: 1:25.00

Mutants to Save: 6

Helping Partner: Spyro

Crash dons his jetpack for this level as zero gravity is introduced into the tubes. Both he and Spyro must make their way through the tubes, avoiding things such as the lasers, floating wires, and hot pipes the clutter and constrict the flyable path. Near the end, the hazards start disappearing as the final doors open up into the open space outside of the space station. I wonder where we are flying to...

Achievement Unlocked: Feeling Weightless

—–

Level 98: The Space Race

Crates: 64

Time Trial

Sapphire: 1:10.00

Gold: 1:05.00

Platinum: 1:00.00

Helping Partner: Sonic

Badniks: UFO Lab Assistant Pawns: They fly around in their small ships, trying to abduct you. It is usually an insta-kill unless you have invincibility.

*Crash and Sonic are on the moon floating about the Earth. The Death Head looms in the background, floating silently in an eerie unison.*

Sonic: “So, I heard from Shads and Ames that you wanted to race me, huh?”

Crash nods. “Yeah!”

Sonic: “Well, I’m not one to say not to a competition.” *He smiles in return.* “Now… what can we use for a raceway…” *He looks at their surroundings and finds the moon here has a futuristic city on it (Like Future Frenzy and Gone Tomorrow) .* “Hey, why do you guys have a city on your moon?”

Crash looks. “I… That shouldn’t exist. Cortex did succeed in making a city for him in the future but this one seems to have been made now…”

Sonic shrugs. “All I can think of is that Eggman probably helped him make it.” *And it shows, since there are neon signs everywhere that have stuff like ‘Neo Cortex’ and ‘Eggman’.* “Heh, I bet they won’t mind if we mess around here?”

Crash: “Well, I don’t care. And I know you don’t care, so…”

Sonic: “True that. Ready to race?”

Crash: “Hold on…” *He uses the Emeralds to make them Super.* “If only for a fair race.”

Sonic: “And if anything gets destroyed, aw, well.” *He smirks and both of them get ready...*

It’s a very fast paced race through Cortex’s and Eggman’s city on the moon. Hovering cars are flying all over the streets but they shouldn’t have been driving today as they are the ones to go flying if you bump or crash into them. The big danger here are the UFO Lab Assistant Pawns that fly about to attempt to abduct you, which, in this super form, is just more of an annoying slow down. Keep on the lookout for transport tubes that can pinball you ahead a few streets. And Sonic is not holding back on his speed so you do not want to make too many mistakes. Remember there is a very shiny 2nd gem on the line if you can beat Sonic.

(If Crash wins:) Crash is ecstatic. “YIPPEE!! I did it! I beat the fastest thing alive!”

Sonic smiles: “Indeed you did, Crash. A wonderful job.”

(If Sonic wins:) Sonic: “You did well, Crash, but you see why I am called the fastest thing alive.”

Crash is still smiling: “I know, but it was fun to race you all the same.”

(In either case:) Sonic: “Now, come on, let’s blow this popsicle stand!”

Achievement Unlocked: Going Super Sonic

—–

Level 99: Space Ships

Crates: 179

Time Trial

Sapphire: 1:50.00

Gold: 1:45.00

Platinum: 1:40.00

Mutants to Save: 6

Helping Partner: Cream

Badniks: Space Lab Assistant Pawns: They carry ray guns and will fire them with good precision unless you keep moving. Falco: They sure do love jetting around and dropping Pawns and bombs. E-2000: Eggman’s humanoid androids that love lasers and shields. If you get close, they might fire it off at you. If you attack them first, they will use their shield to block attacks until it lowers it again. It’s best to attack it as it fires its laser. Egg Cannon: Avoid those targeting reticles or get shelled.

Crash and Cream find themselves warped high up on the city’s skyline traversing across the rooftops as badniks keep up a relenting attack from the roofs and on the flying ships (With the Eggman and ‘N’ insignia on them) that are passing around. Cannons also send shells their way in an attempt to destroy the duo. Keep on moving to avoid them and soon you will start crossing the ships and destroying the cannons that fired at you. It appears we are taking the ships somewhere, but where…

I bet if you messed around on the ships, i bet you might find a gem in one of them...

Achievement Unlocked: The Future Is Now, Thanks To Science!

—–

Level 100: Gravity Crash

Crates: 220

Time Trial

Sapphire: 2:20.00

Gold: 2:15.00

Platinum: 2:10.00

Mutants to Save: 7

Helping Partner: Shadow

Badniks: E-2000R: An upgraded version of the E-2000 that has more health. Oct: Now comes in space octopus flavor. :P Mirror: What bounces off it gets shot back to you. :P

Crash and Shadow keep fighting their way across the various ‘air’ships, taking down all the weaponry along the way. Soon afterwards, they take us back into the Death Head and into the flipping gravity sections of the spaceship. Try to keep a steady balance of speed and grace to avoid the most dangerous badniks and traps that can be faced. And spike balls. Lots of spike balls. I think they like them too much. Either way, our end is just outside the doors that lead into the core…

Oh!, but near the beginning, if you have found all of the colored gems, you can take a secret path through dangerous space of lasers and wildly swinging platforms and past traps to find a second gem and a secret way out of here.

Achievement Unlocked: Flipping and Flopping

—–

*Crash and Shadow end up warped with Dr. Cortex and Uka-Uka in the center of the Space Terrarium where there was a big walkway with a small circular hole in the center.*

Cortex sounds tired as he said: “I’m sorry, I bet you expecting me to be angry and full of rage; incensed beyond belief. Meh, I’m not.”

Uka-Uka: “AND IN FACT, WE’RE FURIOUS-” *He is confused.* “Cortex? What the hell is wrong with you? You’re not supposed to say that!”

Crash and Shadow stand there in confusion as they argue.

Cortex: “What’s the point? They’re just going to defeat us. I’m on a freaking hoverboard and they’re probably going to throw me in that gated hole.”

Uka-Uka: “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”

*Cortex seems distant, as though he knows something, but won’t say.*

Uka-Uka: “Whatever… -BUT IT SEEMS YOU OVERLOOKED ONE SMALL DETAIL YOU BANDICOOT AND HEDGEHOG!! NOW THAT YOU HAVE GATHERED ALL THE CRYSTALS, ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS TAKE THEM FROM YOU!!!”

Aku-Aku: “Not if we stop you, brother!” *Aku-Aku and Uka-Uka start fighting each other as we fight Cortex…*

Boss: Cortex

Aku-Aku and Uka-Uka start attacking each other with a huge laser that spreads across the entire arena. You’ll have to jump over it to avoid it. Cortex, meanwhile, is flying around the arena with a barrier and will be shooting shots from his ray-gun at you that must be avoided or you’ll get burned. Soon afterwards, he will throw mines that must be avoided in radius as well. Cortex will then drop his barrier so you can attack him and get him off his hoverboard. You must then attack him and then knock him into the center grate that has broken off and he’ll fall in for damage. Uka-Uka will then save him and return him to his hoverboard. The process will repeat 2 more, but the masks will then spin around the room in a vortex, and then attack and cause an explosion for the last bit.

Achievement Unlocked: It’s Raining Science!

-----

Cortex screams “NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!” as he falls down the hole and the hoverboard gets destroyed.

Uka-Uka: “No! My meal ticket!” *He chases after Cortex through the hole and is shown that they are falling in space and towards the Earth. Uka-Uka catches up with Cortex.* “Got you! Now…” *He tries to teleport away, but it fails. Eggman had made sure along with shutting off the transport system, he also connected Uka-Uka to it and blocked him from transporting too.* “What?! NO! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!”

*Both he and Cortex fall to the Earth in a shimmer.*

Aku-Aku: “Hmmm… why did my brother not disappear away with Cortex?” *He shows that he can still teleport, suggesting he is unaffected.*

*Sonic and other help return the grate back to covering the hole. Before anyone can say anything, the monitors around them cut off what they were showing and now display Eggman or his insignia.*

Eggman: “Oh, just a little something I did to the dumbass mask. I made it impossible for him to teleport away so they will crash into the Earth.”

Sonic: “That seems… evil? Why did you not do the same to Aku-Aku?”

Eggman: “Because he isn’t my target… besides, it’s essentially an offering to send you guys home.”

Sonic decides to joke: “You hear that guys? We get to go home!”

Eggman: “Ah, not so fast.”

Sonic: “Figures.”

Eggman: “Don’t leave so soon, you still need to find all of the gems too. I was told by that mask that having all of them works just the same as the crystals. So, why don’t you be good deliveryhogs and find them for me.” *He cuts his feed.*

Crash sighs: “We have to find those gems before he can get his hands on them!”

Sonic: “Good, and then we can finally give Eggman a piece of our minds.”

*The heroes find a platform that takes them to a new terrarium…*

Next Time: It’s B O N U S time in the Bonus Terrarium.