#//it's because im behind on them sowwy

[paldean-ranger-brandy]

Hello yes I’d love a Hal and Brandy interaction! Maybe Hal’s on a research trip to Paldea and they’re just having some downtime/swapping Ranger stories

//Hal, my buddy Hal! Hal time. Let's go. @pokebiologisthal Quick note: This is in response to my 100 followers event. Requests for character interaction ficlets are now closed. I'm sorry the last few are coming out so slowly - it's been tough getting onto my actual computer lately.

Brandy was having a, frankly, uncharacteristically productive day. She had finally caught up on her mission reports, organized meetings with 3 different ranger stations to discuss their concerns about paradox pokemon, and she had less than 50 unread emails in her inbox. At a certain point her base leader, Joel, swung by to peer over her shoulder at her work.

“Well I’ll be, Grovehurst,” he commented, adjusting his glasses as he leaned in to get a better view of the screen. “Is that a double-digit number in your inbox? You’re really getting the hang of riding a desk, huh?”

Brandy paused at this, and seemed to snap somewhat out of the focused state she had been in. She, too, looked at the shockingly low (43) number of emails she had left to reply to. “Shit,” she said. “You’re right. I gotta slow down. If I get too good at this head office is gonna start coming by to take a golf club to my kneecaps anytime I’m late with a report.”

“No, they won’t. But I wouldn’t worry about it, your shift ends in a half hour anyway. Maybe you’ll make this the day you actually go home on time, hm?”

“Eh, nah. I’ve got nothing to do tonight, and my apartment is too depressing to do anything other than sleep and eat in.”

Just then Brandy’s musings were interrupted by the buzzing of an incoming text notification. They glanced at their phone to see a text message from their friend Hal.

‘Hello Brandy, I’m sure you’re quite busy but I wanted to let you know that I will be in Paldea for the next few days and was wondering if you’d be free for us to get together for a little hang out :)’

Brandy grinned, leaning forward in their chair to respond.

‘HELL YEAH I AM’

‘You’re free tonight. I get off in half an hour, take a taxi to Tagtree Thicket.’

‘There’s this hangout spot by the river. We’re going to have snacks and drinks there.’

They sent the final of the three texts to Hal and, without waiting for an answer, put their phone down. She gave Joel a playful flick on his nose, who was clearly trying to sneak a peek at her phone screen. “Scratch that last,” they said. “Mark your calendar in commemoration. Today is the day I was productive with my paperwork AND left on time. Turns out I do have plans tonight.”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

That evening found Brandy and Hal sitting underneath by the river that cuts through Tagtree Thicket. There was an assortment of ciders, beers, soft drinks, fruits and veggies, crackers, homemade jam, and a small bit of cooked meat bits that Brandy refused to disclose the source of, but which Hal very strongly suspected might be murkrow. The two were talking back and forth in Fiorean, though Brandy seemed to be getting notably frustrated.

“It’s nice to see you, Brandy,” Hal said, speaking slowly and making sure to enunciate each word.

“It is happy to see you.” Brandy replied, their accent very heavy.

“’I’m’ happy to see you.” Hal corrected, smiling a bit.

“Bah, this is embarrassing.” Brandy gave up, switching back to Galarian. “Wait, do you speak Hoennese?” She asked, switching to her own native tongue.

“I speak just a little bit of Hoennese.” Hal responded, prompting a laugh from Brandy.

“Oh, that was very formal. Don’t worry about it, let’s just stick to this. But man, I used to be nearly fluent in Fiorean. I’m gonna practice some with Joel, you’re gonna be so impressed next time we talk.”

“Speaking of – I can’t believe Joel is here in Paldea with you. The four base leaders in Fiore just seemed so…established.” Hal relaxed back against the tree, twisting the cap off of one of the ciders.

“You think? The only other leader I ever met there was Spenser, and honestly he was a bit of a ding dong. The only thing I know about the other two is that there was some kind of scandal around Cameron and weed, and that Elita was a massive bitch who wouldn’t let her team go to the holiday party.” Brandy cracked open her own drink, the sound of which seemed to summon Michael out from behind a bush. The mightyena happily trotted over, wasting no time in sniffing out the spread of food around them. “Hey bud, not too much. Hal and I gotta eat. Hal, I don’t suppose you have a buddy Michael can play with?”

“Hmmm…” Hal pulled out a pokeball, which immediately caught Michael’s attention. He bounced up and down out of a play bow, excitedly waiting for Hal to release his soon-to-be friend. “I have Jet, but I don’t think Michael is going to…enjoy Jet. Long term. The little guy can be a bit much.”

“Pfffft.” Brandy waved him off. “No such thing. Trust me. Michael has boundless energy for playing. He is without bound, completely.”

“Okay,” Hal said, and then quickly retracted his hand when Michael began impatiently nipping at the pokeball. “Hey, hey! Easy. Here you go.”

The ball was opened, and in a flash of light a small dreepy appeared. Jet made eye contact with Michael, and then froze. Michael was similarly stock still except for a slowly wagging tail. The still silence was held for one beat, and then another, and then without warning Jet exploded out and away from the group. Michael was hot on his tail, yipping excitedly and chasing after the zig-zagging dragon.

“See? They’re fiiiiine,” Brandy said, turning her attention to the poochyena puppy in her lap. “And now lil Mac doesn’t have to worry about her annoying big brother.”

“Sure, sure. We’ll see how long that lasts.” The two seemed to be having a blast at the time, at least. Hal turned his attention back to Brandy. “Anyway. I can’t believe Elita was still doing that by the time you got there. I thought she got enough flack for it that it was just that first year.”

“Wait…were you there for her first year as a base leader?” Brandy asked.

“Yes? That was my first year as a ranger up in Wintown.”

“Hal, I was there for that first year. Her and Joel got promoted at the same time. Are you fucking kidding me?” Brandy was clearly excited now, gesturing with the bottle in her hand and giving Hal a playful slap on the shoulder.

“Wait, so we were rangers in Fiore at the same time?”

“We were! Holy shit, we could have even been friends back then if Elita wasn’t an actual massive cunt!”

“Wow I- well, I wouldn’t use those words exactly, but that is something to ponder. If not for her pettiness and insistence on running drills all year long, we could have had history.” Hal absent-mindedly runs his hand through his hair, apparently preoccupied by thoughts of this alternate timeline.

“Man, I made out with so many people at that party.” She smiled slyly, giving Hal another playful shove. “Coulda been you.”

Hal’s face immediately reddened. “I- well you know- you don’t- we didn’t…” He didn’t seem to quite know what to do with that information. Thankfully, Brandy cut him off with a laugh.

“I’m just teasing. Wanted to see how easy you blush.”

“Well, I hope you’re pleased to have your answer.” Hal muttered, taking a sip of his cider to compose himself. “Even still, that is so strange to think about.”

“Eh, don’t think on it too hard, bud. We’re both here now.”

“Yes, I suppose we are.”

[se0nghwaaa]

🦩 being in the main 4s friend group !! (fluff obvi) ☀️

if u get a crush, be prepared to here 2 diff things.

“y/n how many times have i told u, stop being delulu” from cartman and kenny

and then

“y/n don’t listen to them, yeah u should shoot ur shot!” from stan and kyle

imagine ft calls at like 11:36 pm.. ON SUMMER BREAK TOO

“hey y/n i’m jealous of ur heart.” -kenny

“and why is that 🤨” -y/n

“because it’s pounding inside of u and i’m not.” *white tee by summer walker starts playing* -kenny

“W RIZZ🔥🔥🔥🔥” -cartman

*kyle and stan just privately texting each other*

imagine y’all did talent shows and like one of y’all is a judge.. LMAOO

“alr next is kenny mcormick.” -kyle

*body by megan thee stallion starts playing*

“BODY YADYYADYADY” -kenny

“ur fucking weird… next.” -kyle

* u and cartman r rofl while stan records *

don’t ask why but kenny would smack ur ass like randomly. like when he’s behind u and he realizes he has the chance to smack that dumptruck of urs hes gonna do it.

*smack*

“OW WTF KENNY?..” -y/n

“it wasn’t me it was kyle!” -kenny

“r u serious rn.” -kyle

y’all go over to kyles to study! (y’all never study)

“look at how ___ looks rn😭” -y/n

“they look like a dehydrated horse.” -cartman

“can y’all actually do work instead of copying me.” -kyle

“sowwy kylie wylie… i didn’t mean to….” -y/n

“get out of my house rn.” -kyle

_____

im sorry that’s all u guys get😭..

requests r open *giggles cutely*

[pr0blematic-h0unds]

You are disgusting. Do you have any idea how harmful this is?? Do you have any idea how damaging this is?? You're targeting minors with this kind of content, and your damaging their minds! They'll grow up thinking that this kind of behavior is okay! And the world will be full of incestuous freaks like you! That is not a world I want to live in. I can't believe you people are okay with this. How many people. How many people are like you? How many people think this is okay? Be a normal person and go outside. I can't believe it. What would your parents think?? Would they be okay with you saying this is okay? Why do you even think this is okay? Don't fucking say the "Fiction doesn't affect reality." bullshit. You aren't using this to cope. You aren't using this to have fun. Your using this because your disgusting and want to do bad things to innocent people! Fuck you, unkindly.

Awhh guys look!!! Hosts first hate comment!!!! Lol, funny you think were gonna get affected by a coward who hides behind anon <33333333333

We know were disgusting lolllll, were a lil sociopathic rainbow fag dog who has thoughts that belong in the psych ward on the daily but wdc <3333333333

Also lol we are using this to cope??? Who are you to tell us how we cope with the absolute horrible shit we endured for fucking years. If it doesn't fit your morals womp fucking womp we literally could care less.

Yall think by sending us hate that were magically gonna 'see' how us abusing PIXELS is more wrong than REAL FUCKING VICTIMS LIKE US who survived literal hell when they were at their most vulnerable and unable to do shit but take it.

Yall say you're trying to protect real victims of this shit? Well guess what, most of yall are nothing but double standard assholes who are so stuck up your ass that you ignore the fact that you unapologetically treat us like we deserved that shit. NO ONE, DESERVES THAT SHIT. No matter what they are.

Also, the whole 'targeting kids' thing, im sorry but people tend to forget that fandom space was never intended to take care of kids and be their little safety haven to watch their stupid little pixels waddle around. That is up to their parents, we are not the kids babysitters here to watch them and cater to their young minds.

"It'll damage their minds!!!" Okay?????? Not my problem the fuck?? I could care less because again, NOT MY PLACE TO CATER TO KIDS!!! I'm not gonna drop to my knees infront of a fucking 12 year old and be all:* "OH MY GOD1!1!1 IM SOO SOWWY THAT I POSTED TWO SIBLING CHARACTERS HOLDING HANDS YOUR POOR MIND IS RUINED FORGIVE ME PLZZZZ!!!!!!!!" lmaooo yeah no id rather punch myself in the balls then do that xD

Suck my fat cock and choke on it babe because we cope how we want and little wimps like you are stuck behind your computer heaving and foaming at the mouth because were over here happy and alive just posting little doodles.

Come say this shit off of anon, you won't. If anything you wouldn't even have the balls to say this stuff to our face.

-

Also, we know that you're just copy pasting to other proship blogs ;)

You're not creative, hop off our dicks and take your own advice to touch some grass because it reallllly isn't a good look for you <3

[glitzbot]

Could u show how ur process of ur making comics? Its so stylized and charming im amazed at them 🥺

thank you so much, this is so sweet!! and sure! I'm happy to give you a lil peak behind the curtain at my process

under a cut cause I'm a rambler ✨

every comic of mine starts with a script first! it's not anything too fancy, mostly just the dialogue jotted down in a very inconsistent fashion, like so

and once the fun of writing some sassy stolitz banter is over, next comes the most difficult part imo... thumbnailing the layout

the thumbnail is just a messy ass sketch of basic bitch shapes to work out where I think everything is gonna fit. it's probably not very legible to anyone but me. I mean just look at this shit

once I got that down, I scale it up to fit the page and lower the opacity. then before I do any proper sketching, I get that text in there. oooooh yeah! do those text and speech bubbles and panel borders first babes, TRUST ME. that shit's a time saver

then you can sketch AROUND the speech bubbles, instead of having to sketch -> add text -> oh shit the text is bigger than I thought, now I have to alter the sketch -> rinse repeat on multiple panels and cry

so after that, I'll do a first pass sketch but like yikes I got so damn lazy with one?? wow. it's not always like this I promise

here's an example of another first pass sketch as PROOF, sometimes there's more detail

aaaaanyway if I'm in a real rush, I'll skip to inking, but USUALLY I like to do a cleaner second sketch first like so. it makes inking waaaaaay easier

so yeah after THAT comes the inking. it's usually all in black (I color the lines at the very end, typically) but I did not feel like undoing all my hard work for this screenshot sowwy

after it's all nice and inked, I color using the typical comic book flatting method. flatting is easily the most boring part, but alas, it must be done

I use the fill bucket tool in Clip Studio Paint all on the same layer and yeah the colors look wonky as shit right? that's cause it doesn't matter what colors you use, you just have to be able to grab the areas you want later using the magic wand tool (so you can see all the backgrounds on each panel are a different color to keep them separated, for example)

and that's what I do! after the flats are done, I create a new layer and use the magic wand tool to select and color each area properly. minimal shading, because I hate rendering most of all, so I keep the colors pretty flat! I color in some lines after that and call it good!

I hope this was insightful in some way and made sense! I don't know if I'm any good at explaining things, so if you'd like more clarity on anything, feel free to ask and I'll try again! 💖

[myvirtuallove]

Shy || Darnell x Koko (ocxcanon)

koko being a bit of a tease. @cleverchildblizzard i hope your meal is up to par 🤵🏾‍♀️🤲🏾🍽️

it was currently the middle of the night, a more calm evening for the couple as they relaxed in bed. koko was snuggled up beside darnell, his arm wrapped around her waist as he held her close, koko’s head resting on his chest as she scrolled through her phone.

“darnell.” koko’s voice suddenly filled the air, darnell’s gaze moving to look at her as she caught his attention, letting out a small ‘hm?’. she looked at him, the expression on his face urging her to continue, so she did.

“look.” she spoke with a slight grin, showing him her phone. it was a picture of them when they were still in school. “found an old picture of us.” she muttered, darnell humming in response.

“where’d you find that?” he asked, his hand slowly moving against the small of her back as he listened to her speak.

“it was still in my photos, surprisingly…” she replied, voice drifting off as she stared at the picture. she glanced between him and the photo, and he was quick to notice her doing so.

“what?” he asked, raising a brow. koko chuckled a little, shaking her head slightly.

“nothing—nothing. just…you used to act so different around me. so shy. like, look,” she gestured to her phone. “you used to look like you couldn’t be around me too long or you’d combust.” she joked, darnell cringing a little as he looked at himself in the photo again, groaning in response.

he threw his head back slightly against the pillows, slinging his arm across his eyes, clearly a little embarrassed. “koko—“

“whaaat?” she spoke before she let out a hearty laugh, sitting up and turning to face him. “i think it was cute. why you gettin’ all embarrassed?

her hand released her phone, resting the device on the nightstand before she gave him his undivided attention. he let out a huff, removing his arm off of his face before he spoke up, looking up at the ceiling before he looked at koko.

“‘cause..” he replied. koko then leaned in as he spoke, playfully raising a brow.

“becaausee??” there was a period of silence, darnell’s expression shifting as he squinted at her, looking her up and down. koko couldn’t help but snicker, causing him to scowl lightly, though there was no true anger behind it.

“you like seein’ me like this huh? ‘like fuckin with me just because.”

“you do the same!” koko protested as she broke out into a fit of giggles, much to darnell’s dismay. “i was genuinely asking!”

“why you laughin’ then?” he asked, only making her giggle some more. “‘cause you made a weird face!”

“yeah a’ight.” he huffed, slinging his arm over his face yet again as koko’s laughter died down. she scoffed playfully , moving to sit atop of his lap as she moved his arm, making him look at her.

“i was just playin’, love.” she smiled, playfully pinching his cheek. he only hummed, looking away with faux annoyance. “ya’ big baby.”

“i ain’t a baby.” he muttered, hands moving to her waist to pull her closer to him, chests pressed together as another comfortable silence grew between them.

“mmmhm.”

“…i remember destiny told me one time you almost blew me up tryna confess. is that tr-“

“get off my lap.” “I WAS ASKING? “off.” “Im sorry 😢?” (they start staring at each other, followed by darnell lifting her up) “NO—NO I SAID SORRYYY”

that’s it 🫡. i was hella sleepy when i made this so i kept drifting in and out of sleep HELP sowwy guys (i kinda don’t like this)

[docilepillow]

MARCH 2024 MEDIA DIARY 2

I ran out of embed space on the first post i had slotted in for this!!! So i'm making two posts!!!!!!! They belong together!!!! Okay!!!!!!! PIZZA TOWER < this game is soggy goop >

Even though I cleared a good portion of this game nigh a year ago now, i still feel compelled to put it on my media diary now, as i've only just got around to finishing the game properly! I believe the point i dropped off the game before was at Pig City, which, i think , is kinda understandable given how big that level is, but, was probably a real bummer for the whole of my friend group who were super into the game when it was new and i probably missed out on talking about it alot with them... POOP!!!! just because this game is popular enough to actually warrant talking about it with my friends later, instead of saying stuff like how i enjoyed the silly cartoony art stlye and the games general charm, im just going to post a level tier list i made the second i beat the game at like near midnight kinda hazy-minded without thinking on it too hard without thinking too deeply in a way thatll be completely inflamitory bc im mostly satisfied with the experience i had and dont really feel the urge to P rank anything --

The stats are saying my total hours round up to 6 hours 50 and pepinno is pointing at me Aughh

My , , Errr, " CRITISISM " of this game is that the funny pizza man is a little, erm, STICKY? Kinda gross. a little weird. Partially my fault. I'm sowwy. I'm not very good at this game but i absolutely respect everyone's opinion on it . Go watch my friend @shoppncart's speedrun, by the way, it's cool :

Speedy! THE MARIO MOVIE < the bario boooby geheheheheheheh >

this is probably a tired opinion but since i was subjected to this movie for the fifth time in a voice call my take is thaat this is probably more enjoyablel then the safeass illumination film. like. yea. that films probably objectively better but. id rather watch something thats an actual adaptation. like this movie. where basically nothing mario happens outside names . Aw. i honestly think this movie has intrigue to it genuinely maybe im saying this bc its one of the movies ive actually watched repeatedly before, like roger rabbit, but i think the history behind this movie and the old anamocity turned-endearment are what make it worth watching. that and its a little goopy You Guys Wanna See Some MM2 Proggys? not a new piece of media technically but ive been playing a fuckton of MM2 recently still as of the end of the month and its absolutely dominating my time as of late, and i kinda wanna show off a small amount of the progress ive made on it, as much as the world map, at least --

It's a media diary. it exists to document MY gaming life. Deal. anyway in regards to it i'm almost finished with the world 4 castle, which is crazy, because before i hadn't even finished world 2, but now i got all of this creative energy in me... If i finish this soon enough, i'd be able to upload it on NSO, so keep your tumpler eyes peeled, mutrals :J I personally like it because theres a theme of aescending on the world map. The space theme in this looks the best, i think.. THE ALCHEMY OF US - HOW HUMANS AND MATTER TRANSFORMED ONE ANOTHER < what the fuck ????? a book ??????? >

yea thats right im reading books this ones actually pretty good apparently a 2020 bestseller though im not in the habit of reading those often so i'll just have to take their word for it on that aspect. i think lifes all about trying new things so around halfway through the month i picked up this cool book i found at my library and got a library card. After reading through it all, i think anecdotally that this book is a very neat read. theres a few sentences that're a little offputting to my young mind but overall the book is filled with alot of cool insight i reccomend checking out if youre the boooky type of person! i think its very good and im glad i picked it out :) i donnu how many of these will be going onto my media diary in the future or anything , but maybe i will if i end up reading more! I'll have to make it up to a friendd for waiting till now to put up something i read here first before that thing she likes. oops.

Volp. OUTSIDE of the traditional media format again, also, are things i largely started on this month but don't think i'll be making all too much more progress in, or if i'm unsure i'll finish what i was doing all in one month- CASTLEVANIA THE ADVENTURE- REBIRTH

POINT OF DROP OFF - STAGE 4 END BOSS REASON BEING - UMMM SORRY I GOT DISTRACTED AND DIED TOO MUCH

castlevania rebirth is a really really cool game. its really cool and im not typing this as fresh as everything else because it was something i picked up for one big sitting earlier in the month. i probably couldve finished it at any point during the week, but simply was too distracted and wanted to do other stuff. It's very cool though, i love the vector sprite art, and there ARE silly stock sound effects everywhere, which is always a big positive for me . I mostly just like how snug the wii classic controller is , and this is a cool game to play it with considering its one of the only non virtual console or old game collection style games available for wii in this exact style ( Not counting the good handful of games that choose to use the wiimote on its side instead. )

over all ill probably sit down and finish this someday soon i just gotta like find time for it whenever next my wii u is plugged in ( it fights for an hdmi slot with my switch and ps4 all the time...! ), and ill probably end up trying to play punch out wii at the same time, given one doesnt dominate my attention over the other. From my understanding they're both short, though, so it shouldnt be too big a deal or obstacle no matter how long i put this off. RANDOM TERRARIA PLAYTHROUGH terraria playthru 1million

ii just really want to see the new terraria update Waaaah... i stopped having fun because i self imposed myself to not use setbonus armor sets at the part of the game where that stops being acceptable anymore so im stopping i think i did get to make another terraria pet though that makes me happy POINT OF DROP OFF - the mechanical bosses

also the most recent thing is

i got too tense and needed to excuse myself after like an hour 30 i cant take too much tension in movies i was really uncomfortable and had to leave to take a breather bc the main character gets put in a really really shitty situation and it was getting hard to watch for my autistic ass

thats enough i think thanks for coming see you next month lol

[woodencuffs]

Drunk princess

She thought she was successfully sneaking drinks but as soon as I got home I could tell she’d been drinking from her flushed face and smell of it on her breath; her drinking wasn’t aginst the rules but normally she asked instead of being sneaky about it and even then she rarely got hammered. I poured myself a few drinks as well noticing her sneaking off to the kitchen occasionally and could the cap of one of the various liquor bottle being slowly unscrewed each time. We chitchated about our days and plans while I contemplated what to do about this situation. After about her 4th trip to kitchen her speech was beginning to slur and she wasn’t as steady on her feet as normal “princess come here” I called to her she came over holding her cup and I patted my lap “sit” she plopped down on my lap heavily sloshing some of drink on me and the couch I grunted with the impact and she giggled; I wrapped my arms around her and just held her while she chattered on while sipping her drink. Finally as her cup was getting close to empty I took it from her hand and took a sip and she went silent “hmmmm Princess what’s in here” “just juice daddy” she slurred. I squeezed my free arm around her a little tighter “Princess daddy’s not dumb” I said not raising my voice but adding some sternness to it as an unspoken warning about lying. “There’s alcohol in it” she mumbled I handed her back her cup and she began to protest raising her voice a bit “but it’s ok for me to have it in a big girl” I pushed her hand with the cup up towards her mouth. “Well it just made you lie to me and I know you’d never do that without it right? But go ahead and finish that one and we’ll talk about it” she glumly downed the rest of her drink and put the cup down “im sowwy daddy but it’s just really good and makes me feel funny I just wanted to have some” I stroked her hair “princess I have no problem with you drinking it’s just how much and that you didn’t tell me what if I didn’t know and something happened to you” “you’ll protect me daddy because you’re big and strong” I kissed her neck “you’re right daddy will protect you but what if he’s away and there’s another big strong man around?” She hmphed and said “well he’s not my daddy so I wouldn’t look at him” at this point I pushed one of my hands down into her shorts to rub between her legs and the other hand went up her crop top groping her breast; she squirmed in my lap whimpering “what if the big strong man did this and said he was your daddy now” I growled in her ear; she squirmed some more and whimpered “I’d wun away from him” “but princess you’re drunk how could you possibly run away” “I could” she squealed. I placed another kiss on her neck before whispering in her ear “then show me..run”

She tried to jump out of my lap but I hooked her shorts with both hands and yanked them down she stumbled but I wrapped both my arms around her holding her up to break her fall. She gasped as I lifted her wile holding her shorts down with my foot taking her completely out of them before putting her back down and quickly lifting her top over her head and arms; she tried to resist but she was sluggish from the booze and while I had a buzz I still had full control of my movements and my speed and strength was too much for her. Now having stripped her down I quickly leaned down and grabbed something from her shorts and pocketed it then from behind I grabbed her throat and forced her straight up back up against me and with the other hand I rubbed her pussy before pushing two fingers in listening to her moan. We stood like this for a few minutes my hand hand constantly moving and exploring inside her wile the other would go from throat to putting fingers in her mouth while I kissed and bit on her shoulders and neck; finally I pulled my fingers out of her with one hand and grabbed what I’d picked up earlier from my pocket and with the other hand I grabbed her chin and turned her head so I could plant a soft kiss on her cheek. “Now what Princess the big strong man caught you what would you do now” “I-i-I’d scream” she stammered shakily “but Princess how are you gonna do that with a full mouth?” I replied with a smirk. She opened her mouth to ask what I meant but I had her panties in my hand quickly shoved them in her mouth with one hand wile holding onto her hair to keep her from jerking away before she quite figured out what was happening. At first she was so shocked she just let it happen but then tried to spit them out but i covered her mouth. “Shhh we can’t have you screaming little girl” i whispered in her ear.

I dragged her over to the the side of the couch and pushed her over the arm and she caught herself and tried to push herself back up while I hastily undid my belt and dropped my pants; she managed to get back to her feet and I pushed her back over the arm but this time when she caught herself I leaned over her keeping her from getting back up. I grabbed a pillow and slid it under her head “here you go princess get comfortable” I said and then forced her arms out and behind her back making her go face first into the pillow. Now that she was down I grabbed her hips and pulled her into position admiring how cute she was; now that I had her lined up I plunged my cock into her and held it for a second hearing her moan. She tried to squirm away and I grabbed both her hands and held them behind her back as a began to build my thrusting rhythm. After I had a good hard rhythm built up I let go of her hands and began to use mine to slap her ass, run my nails down her lower back, pull her hair. And occasionally when i noticed she’d managed to work her panties partially out of her mouth I’d shove my fingers in with them to resecure them. I told her how good it felt and how pretty she looked and occasionally leaning down to plant a kiss on her body. I was in a rut and needed more tomorrow she’d be sore but since she was so drunk tonight she was feeling mostly pleasure from what she could feel. I began switching holes and heard her moans pick up a new intensity I just kept going almost getting lost in the pleasure of her; then finally I slowed down and reached down pulling her drool soaked panties out of her mouth and held them in front of her face “what a mess” I said and tossed them. She was out of breath and shaking I patted her butt and said “do you see why daddy’s worried now princess” “yesssss” she moaned “is anyone else allowed to do this to you?” I asked “noooo only daddy�� “and why is that?” “Because I’m yours” she whimpered “that’s right princess you’re mine so please watch your drinking from now on and don’t lie or try and sneak it by me ok?” “Ok daddy” she whispered quietly looking back at me with puppy eyes. I began to start up again fucking her slowly and working back up to speed and reached down to grab her hair pulling it back “who can do this to you?” “Dadddyyyy” she moaned. I slapped her ass “and who else?” “Noooo oneeee” she managed to get out after a gasp. I slapped her ass again “why?” She gasped again “because I’m yours” another slap “and who else’s?” Ughhhh nooo one else’s” I laid another couple slaps down on her ass “let me hear it all together” she stuttered, mumbled, and gasped but managed to get it all out that she was mine and only mine and no one as allowed to touch her besides me” I went into a full sprint at that point fucking her as hard as I could until I finally reached my limit and finished with a clenched teeth groan. She laid there breathing hard and I admired my handiwork of all the little marks I’d left she would definitely be requiring princess treatment tomorrow. I pulled her up, kissed her, and picked her up in a cradle hold “you’re my angel you know” I whispered and she smiled and leaned her head on me as I carried her to bed.

[holmsister]

Kabru argues angrily at Laios about how his shapeshifter's armour is all wrong and my eyes are NOT that big and I DON'T giggle like that thats ridicolous meanwhile Laios is like. Idk man that one looks a lot more like what i remember. Very cute. And the Fake Kabru keeps trying to hide behind the Laioses a bit like oh you remember me as that aggressive... is it because I stabbed your sister... im sowwy about that do you forgive me... and the Laioses are both like OF COURSE and Kabru is fuming like. Foiled by his own stupid charm.

Meanwhile Kabru's shapeshifter of Laios is completely impossible to tell apart from the real thing. Kabru tries to interrogate them on monster facts but Fake Laios makes up fake monster facts and Kabru doesn't know which ones are correct. Eventually Kabru makes them cook and Fake Laios' food sucks balls because Kabru does NOT know how to cook so Fake Laios is killed.

Ultimately Fake Kabru is foiled by Laios going Dog Mode like in canon and Kabru is FUMING. Never been so angry in his life and unable to understand why because didn't he deliberately try to seduce Laios and present an inoffensive and sweet front? Of course Laios would prefer the version of him that he deliberately built to attract him that shouldn't make him angry he should be happy it worked. And instead he is having so much angst about Laios not liking the Real him and he has to pretend everything's fine which pisses him off even more.

And then they meet the succubi and Kabru is like. Oh shit that's Laios. Well that explains a lot. Thankfully Laios' is Monster!Kabru so he isn't the only one embarrassed. And then they kiss.

It is very important to me that Laios remembers Kabru stabbing Falin perfectly. It adds to the cuteness for him. Remember whenever he speaks about a monster he's always like "and then the roots digest you! The plant creates its own fertiliser by killing adventurers!" With a great big smile on his face. Its the same thing he's like his smile is so cute and his eyes are so pretty and he is so good at murder<3 he's so adorable I wanna hold his hand

Anyway i need fanfic in which Kabru and Laios meet Laios' shapeshifter version of Kabru.

[missmeinyourbones]

what icks do you think the aot boys are guilty of having lol

aot boys x icks! (part 2) (jjk version)

now THIS is content i can get behind

eren:

is the type of guy to think that just letting the water hit him in the shower is washing his body... like you're showering together and ur scrubbing ur legs w body wash or something and he's like wait... you wash your legs? like you don't just let the water and soap hit them? WHAT

tries to start a podcast and thinks hes making really profound points but its the most basic and bare minimum conclusions like "working out actually improves your mental health"

his hair gets greasy really easily but he doesnt like to wash it every day bc it dries it out. you recommend dry shampoo and he REFUSES because it “makes his hair look gray” and ur like no not if you apply it like this and rub it in!!!! he doesnt listen

accidentally airs ur dirty laundry and secrets to all of ur friends LMFAO he really doesnt mean to though but youll all be having dinner or something and someone will order a specific food and he’ll be like “wait baby isnt that the food that gives you really bad gas?” goodbye

the classic "THIS IS FOR YOU <3" and misses

armin:

uses the 🥺 emoji way too much for a grown ass man. like its cute sometimes but its definitely his most used emoji. also says "sowwy" when ur mad at him :/

loves when you scratch his back/head but only does urs for like 2 mins LMFAO. ur taking turns in bed and when its his turn to scratch he does it for like 30 seconds and then is like my turn :) or im tired goodnight :) also gets mad when you stop unexpectedly. gives you side eye

drools in his sleep LMFAO. sleeps with his mouth open and its not that big of a deal unless he’s sleeping on you and you wake up with a fucking wet patch on your chest as if a baby was just napping on you

prefers you without make up and doesnt really understand that you wear it for personal or creative reasons, like he automatically assumes its because you’re insecure or covering something up. like youre going out and having fun getting ready and looking pretty and hes like “why do you wear makeup when you are so beautiful naturally? :)” 

buys millennial merch like “dont talk to me before my coffee” or those signs that say “dogs welcome! people tolerated” also calls dogs “floofers” and “doggos”

jean:

genuinely says sheesh. like not as a joke. he'll be like sheesh baby you look so good today and you'll have to hide ur embarrassment lol

is the type to NEVER let you get away with stuttering or fumbling ur words. you know that tiktok thats like "you ever stutter so hard you just have to stfu" thats you around jean LMFAO. you mispronounce one word and hes never letting you forget it

NEVER FINISHES A WATER BOTTLE. he will leave half filled bottles all over the place and then have the audacity to open a new one and drink it in front of you???

sleeps like a LOG. will not move. when he snores and you try to kick him a little bit to be like hey turn over ur snoring, he is not waking up. he gets up the next morning whistling a little tune looking like he just had the best sleep of his life and you crawl out of bed like a gremlin who almost fell off the bed and listened to his snores for 10 hours

such a music snob. he will be like “baby i recently discovered this really good song you probably havent heard of it its super underground” and its tame impala LOL

connie:

hes a mouth breather. he also chews so fucking loud. you guys are sitting at the kitchen table, eating breakfast & minding ur own business, and he is going to TOWN on his food. close ur mouth. imbecile

kinda the same topic but definitely bites his ice cream / popsicles. you are starting to think he doesnt have feeling in his front teeth anymore. he crunches the fuck out of ice as a "snack"

laughs along with a joke that you know he doesnt understand PLEASE it could be an inside joke w you and your girlfriends and hes trying to butt into the conversation like "HAHAHA"

his phone is always greasy and has crumbs in the cracks of the case and shit. ur like oh babe can you take a pic of me real quick??? and its so blurry because of the shit on his lens

leaves the toilet seat up every. single. time. especially not fun when you pee in the middle of the night and fall in with sleepy tired eyes 

levi:

sleeps with socks on. LET UR DOGS BREATHE LEVI. he thinks sleeping barefoot is nasty so he puts on a new pair of socks every time he gets into bed

has to correct you, even on tiny minute details. youre telling a story and youre like "so we waited in line for like 30 minutes" and hes like "it was actually 45." or "we went out to eat last monday" "it was tuesday but ok" like ENOUGH. let me have something

worst. backseat. driver. ever. you could break a little too quickly ONE time and hes so dramatic about it. “that wasnt a complete stop” “you’re supposed to be in the next lane” “that car was in your blindspot and you didnt even look” 

answers the phone with “what” every single time. not a hello??? how are you??? how was your day??? it sounds like a chore but in reality he just doesnt like technology and thinks phone calls/texts should be as concise and quick as possible

has literally no decor in his house/apartment like it actually looks uninhabited. has like one couch and a bed. you offer to help him pick some things out and hes like “im always at work anyways why would i need a table”

reiner:

likes drake LMFAO not even old drake (when he was good) but like new "say that you a lesbian girl me too" drake

repeats a joke that didn't land because he thinks you didn't hear it. but you did. it just wasn't funny

when you guys first started talking he was definitely the guy to be like "ur so beautiful, whats a girl like you doing with a little ugly boy like me???" when you guys are in a relationship youre able to see that its just his insecurities manifesting but. it was cringey at first

i just know this man has dirty fingernails. like they are short and well kept but there is always DIRT AND GRIME under them. you make him wash his hands before he touches you

cant be quiet for the life of him. he has loud ass footsteps. like ur sleeping and granted he is trying so hard to be quiet but he literally cannot. slams his drawers, shuts the door so loud, will play a video on his phone full blast. and then when you stir from your sleep and glare at him hes like “good morning :D”

porco:

genuinely says "without me? :(" when you say you are about to shower LMFAOOOO its kinda funny when you guys are in an established relationship bc u can just smack him but he is definitely guilty of saying it seriously when you two were in the talking stage

accidentally mansplains things to you. not in a demeaning or belittling way but like youll make a joke about "why cant we just print more money" and this business major bitch is like "baby...are you serious...because inflation will-" like OKAYYYY it was a joke

his hair is so crunchy from all of the hair product/gel he uses on it. sometimes when hes fresh out of the shower youll compliment his natural hair as an attempt to get him to lay off the gel. his hair is so hard you could drop a brick on his head and it would deflect 

backwashes in all of your shared drinks

manspreads, especially in public. youll be sitting in a crowded place and he is openly sprawled out extremely comfortable while a woman with a baby is giving him a dirty look

i had a lot of fun coming up with these! i hope this was what you were asking for :3 thanks for requesting!

[sailorhyunjinz]

what kinda lingerie would skz be into 👀👀👀

OH ANON THIS WAS MY EXCUSE TO LOOK AT CUTE LINGERIE SO BLESS YOU ASHAHSAS

also sowwy this took such time aaaaah IM TRYING!!

and yeah none of these photos belong to me neither do i claim some sort of ownership over them so that nobody gets confused!!! 

Warnings; fem!reader, lingerie, suggestive pictures?? LIKE IDFK?? 

ugh i wish i could have more pictures but tumblr only allows 10 pictures in one post AND SO there is a much broader variety of lingerie that they would like?? BUT I JUST CANT SO LEGO 

Bangchan

i feel like he likes details so like jewerly??

body chains?!?!?

mostly pastel 

but likes pretty much everything because it’s on you!!!

it shouldnt be too hard to take off LMAO 

thats his only term!! MUST BE EASY TO TAKE OFF

Changbin

dark colors are his favorites because SMEXY ;)))

stockings!!!!!! (especially fishnets!!!)

likes shit that barely covers you lmao 

it should be made up out of strings and scraps of fabrics that are barely bigger than the size of your nipples AKSDSAJDHJSA

likes many different types of material

but leather is his fave

Minho

once again, another boy that likes darker colors??

attention to details

LACEEEEE

it should look like an art piece 

leashesssssssssss (cause he can grab them from behind duh)

garter belts

Hyunjin 

you need to look like an angel that has just landed in his bed

usually prefers lighter colors

FRILLS!!!!

and thigh highs/knee highs!!

once again,,, garter belts

aesthetically pleasing (cause he will be taking pictures of you)

might even like cat ears and tails ><

Jisung 

something tells me that he likes roleplay

and so this is very fitting

it should barely cover you

very small bras???

bows!!!

also maniac for thigh highs

will rail you in only thigh highs

also likes when you wear shoes?? IDK WHY BUT A FEELING

Felix

prefers the cuter sets of lingerie

this is not related to the lingerie but likes it when you wear makeup because he wants to ruin it hehehe

COLLARS!!!!

those with your name on it

FRILLSSSSS

panties that make your butt look plump and round :(((

weird like arm cuffs and leg cuffs

Seungmin

he’s an elegant boy and so he likes lingerie that looks very classy~

like floral patterns 

or nice metal details

or like this,,, with sheer details and dainty chokers

maybe lingerie that is more covered??

because it’s like a tease so that he can imagine whats underneath ;))

Jeongin

simple, clean, easy!!

lace chokers!!

or like pearls???

also small bows :((

or like this - a small lil garter,,, skirt?? or wtf that is 

once again,,, easy to take off

babyboy doesnt want it to be a challenge to get into your pants LMAOHSAUHDS

[volfoss]

🎵🔥 for ayame 🍁💫 for fiore and ✨🌼 for agliata :)

hi chrissssss hewwo <3333 thank u <3

Ayame:

🎵 - What are 3 songs you associate with them?

Well <3 I'll toss in a mix of sad and happy ones because idk i wanna <3 here u go: We'll Meet Again (Vera Lynn, and well <3 its sure because she keeps having husbands die <3) Goodbye (Mary Hopkin, bc of post first husband dying lore <3), and the one happy song- Bang-A-Boomerang by ABBA (literally THE ayame shinobu song idc)

🔥 - What makes them angry?

If literally ANY of my ocs have shit to be angry about, it is ayame, but unfortunately she's really laid back. i think? probably the most angry girl moment she's had is when she found out what exactly happened to her second husband (understandably) but she's relatively good at masking her anger/feelings in general, so it wasn't necessarily super apparent to anyone outside of her and the man who killed him. the rest of the people around her don't really know when she's mad, even if she's close to them (ie shinobu normally cannot tell).

Fiore:

🍁 - Can they be intimidating?

Not at all <3 fiore is like really only intimidating if you let him behind the wheel, because this man goes from relatively nice to road rage in 2 seconds. do not let him drive like ever.

💫 - What would a stranger's first impression of them be?

i think like fiore is kinda the overbearing kind of extrovert so would definitely leave an impact on a stranger. hes very much perceived as kind and bubbly but also someone that can be a bit overwhelming at first.

Agliata:

✨ - What are some things you associate with them? (Something like fire, a certain flower, an item, ect.)

Already answered (in Em's ask i believe?)

🌼 - What is their voice like?

Also already answered sowwy :( i THINK in rosas ask? maybe not tho im sorry :(

[muffindaddystyles]

𝑫𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏.

Where Harry's five years old bubba gets lost in a park while playing hide and seek. You help her to find her daddy.

Warning: Emotional and whole lot of fluff <3

Pastel tutu frock, a lil bucket hat and shoes that makes 'puch.' 'puch.' noises when she waddles with her adorable toddler gait chasing her father.

It's still early in the morning less people more relieved Harry that he could spent some affectionate time with his lovin' little girl of four out in the park, as a single father he dresses her with more fashion indulgment than any mother could.

Cheeky smug He's. Kinda proud of it.

They were playing hide and seek a bit far from their picnic basket ontop of checkered blanket along her toys. She came all the way from their home to car and car to park sitting on her daddy's shoulders.

"Dawwy! That's cheatin'." She stomped her dainty feet into sodden lush grass underneath and Harry grinned booping her button nose just like his's, "cheeky bugger." He watched her in amusement when she caught his slender finger with her chubby ones, pouting cutely at him.

"Kay. lovie' we're gonna play, again." He assured her raising his palms in air taking two steps back at once, "this time no cheatin', promise." She bobbed her head enthusiasticly running to hide behind the nearest largest oak tree as her daddy told her not to go too far from him ever.

Harry was rounding her from other side when too impatient she went to found Harry on other side, "daw'wy!?" Her flight of run like a dove in sky was startled when she found her tall, curly head daddy nowhere in sight.

She toddled further away even though Harry has instructed her never to leave a certain place no matter what, her daddy would find her at the same spot if something happens.

"Bubba? love bug'?" He frowned as his daughter who just hid behind the same bark vanished. Not getting anxious he strided back to their spot but she wasn't there.

She has come so far away in search of her daddy at first she told herself that "she's daddy's big girl." . "she would get back to him and he'd give her alot of kisses." But then she got scared seeing alot of people here and there. Her ending point of bravery was when some little pal hit her with soft ball.

The pool of tears bursted like rainfall from her soft warm eyes, staining her coral chunky cheeks and she rubbed her glossy eyelids with the back of her hand with series of hiccups making her vision more blurry.

You were sitting under a shade reading a copy of Little Women. Eyes flickering when you poked your tongue out to collect some moist on your finger to turn the paper, right then your eyes fell over the cutest fuzz of a lil girlie crying with painful fat tears waddling her way lost towards the pond and with a loud gasp you left everything running towards her before she was too close to it.

"Hey. hey kiddo." You reached at the mean time quickly scooping her up in your arms and she sobbed out loudly, "dawwy!" You stroked her hair as she snoggled her snotty nose and moist face in the crook of your neck.

"Honey are you lost?" You tried to calm her down by rubbing soothing circles at her back and she nodded with incoherent blabbering.

"Lemme me help you, yeah? Do you know your parent's names." You asked her politely taking her back to where you were sitting under the large tree and she pulled her face out murmuring a tiny, "yesh." You beamed at her giving her a thumbs up.

"You're doing so good, darlin'." You tucked her loose curls under her ear and she tells you her father's name, "Hawwy. S'tyles." She doesn't have her way with 's and t's.' sounds so it was 'yles.' coming from her mouth and you had to comprehend it yourself.

"Honey you know his number?" She counts on her fingers as Harry made her learn his phone number in case of any emergency like this but she's so anxious she forgot, silent tears again spilling out from her struggle. "Sh. sh. lovie'. S'okay, you're okay. you're safe with me." You cooes at her softly wiping her tears and kissing her cheeks gently rocking her on your knees.

"B-but. dawwy!" She hiccups badly and you made her sip water, feeling pitiful for the poor bub.

"Bubs we're gonna find your daddy, yeah? you and me together are a whole power puff team!" You again rock her cheerfully standing up with her on your hip. Taking the challenge on yourself to find her daddy in no less time.

On the other hand Harry was loosing his mind. He pulled at his hair anxiously, worry drowning him into deep. Scared for his bubba. She's so little im this huge park. Harry never lets her dodge from under his wings and now he's on verge of getting a panic attack. He should have never came to park. He went from one person to another showing his petal's picture to them hands trembling as he did so.

"Sh-she's fou'. Little pink hat, tutu frock. Chocolate c-curls in specific." He gesticulated voice wavering and with everyone denying he went absolute crazy.

Tears glistening in his eyes and he's feeling as if he'd stop breathing. Putting his hand over where his heart is he took long strides of the whole park which's too big and in the end he fell on his knees with a thud onto grass when he couldn't find his only life, the piece of his heart nowhere. Sobbing loudly that made him bent outwards.

They live near by so he quickly dialed gemma. When she heard him sobbing onto speaker she abruptly stood up scaring Anne too, "Harry what happened?" She asked worriedly.

"Harry talk to me." She tried in a calming voice and he stuttered even causing Gemma to lost her breath, "d-dovie. lost her gem. fuckin' lost her. Couldn't find her." She was quick to act not telling Anne and assuring her she would in their car ride.

Harry was falling into his mum's embrace when they rushed to security department where Harry's at as the cops assured him that they'll find his daughter safe and unharmed.

He whimpered soaking her shirt. Whole body shaking, "can't lost her mum, she's the only one I've." She tried to calm him getting rid of her own tears.

"S'been two hours I've been searching her like a mad man. I'll fuckin' die if somethin' happens to her." At this Anne scolded him as gemma hugged him reassuring him. "It's m'fault. All m'fault." His tears and emotions were all where and he blamed himself.

"Shit father. never gonna forgive myself." Anne sighed shakily stroking his head. She has never seen her son crippling to this edge.

"She's fine. We'll find her."

Your back sweaty as the sun shines on you mercilessly while you hurriedly walked with Dove on your hip, her head on your shoulder resting sadly while you fanned her continuously with the paper fan and you breathed hunching a little seeing that some security department's few steps away from you. But, it's the one opposite from where Harry and his family are.

You immediately went to first table not waiting for your breaths to get back to normal, "hi. This's Dove Styles. Four. Lost." You informed them and they made you sit at the bench.

She was getting all tired and limpy from the crying. So you took her in your lap tucking her head under your armpit, "daddy's soon gonna come okay dove darlin'? Then he's gonna collect you fuzz baby in his arms." You took out a box of juice from your backpack tapping the straw against her rosy lips and you took in her features thinking how beautiful her daddy must be to her be this cute.

Even though her daddy has sternly taught her never to accept things from strangers but the poor babe's so exhausted she did.

Some cop came cop telling you they've found her daddy that he's at the other security building but you shook your head stubbornly squeezing her near to your chest. Because well you don't trust anybody not even the cops, most importantly not when it's a child.

"Tell her daddy to come take his child from here." The cop grunts at you. "Annoying lady." but you ignored him checking on dove cleaning her hands that were sticky from her drinking juice like how toddlers do.

You were hot on your feet when three panicked figures came rushing inside Dove on your hip and you asked her, "is that your da—" but you were cut off from her yearning cry.

"Dawwy!" It was like sky and ground meeting as Dove latched into Harry's arms, he was too ripped to shreds and with a loud whimper he feel stingingly onto tiled floor firm grip around his dovie's neck, forearm wrapped around her little body protectively. He clutched onto her for dear life, sponging endless kisses to her visible skin.

"Thought I lost ye' bubba...really thought–" He said in between wet kisses his tears smudging her cheeks and the duo's reunion infront of you made you sentimental too. "Never scare daddy like this dove. m'heart stopped." She muttered a 'sowwy.' At his anxious rambling.

"Forgive me, dovie. Daddy's bad." She shook her head. The four year old's too soft from heart to know what emotions are scowling at her daddy with her chubby palms pushing into his cheeks, "no dada." You smiled at her when she glanced back at you.

"Y/n helped mew. She say we were power puff girls." You chuckled that she still remembers ruffling her hair, "see? Told ya daddy was gonna find you." Harry rubs his nose wiping his tears standing up.

"Thank you so much, can't thank you enough." You found his voice so mellow even after hoarseness, "s'okay. She's safe that all matters." Anne and gem nodded while talking to Dove in baby voices telling her how worried they all got.

You were walking outside while talking to Harry, "and thank ye' fo' not trusting anybody you know...and no' lettin' her go." You assured him shaking his hand.

"No problem." You leaned down a little kissing her cheek, "and dove honey never go near to ponds, yeah?" She said a lil 'okie." wrapping herself tight around her father.

"Oh my god, dovie?" He asked her horrid at what could happen taking her chin but you quickly rambled not wanting to make him feel more panicked and anxious.

"She was crying and in haze that's why, she's okay now Mr. Styles."

"I owe you y/n. And please just call me, Harry." You nodded sheepishly now. Muttering a what the hell you fool at yourself and gemma quipped.

"Yes. Please have lunch with us?"

"Pwease?" You laughed out aloud at dove's innocent pleading deciding to let your English class go and bobbing your head at which Harry grinned, "perfect."

.

[douglasfeiffel]

hey lol tell me about,,,, your first oc, your favorite oc, or your most recent oc

OKAY YEAH IM HYPED

so my first oc was a character created while i was in 3rd grade named otterfrost (why i go by otter online!). They were a medicine cat in the clan of shadowclan who's brother, wolfstar, went off to go lead shadowclan. About a year into wolstar's reign, otterfrost started to suspect that wolfstar was hiding something. They went to go investigate and found that wolfstar was planning to try and assassinate the riverclan leader in a twisted way to gain favor from starclan. Otterfrost flipped their shit and was like "Hey, if you go through with this, i'll tell all the other medicine cats" so wolfstar was like "Ugh. Cringe." and exiled them, telling the whole forest that otterfrost had poisoned some warriors that had died of greencough and driving them off clan land. Otterfrost tries to tell the riverclan leader, but wolfstar is like "lmao" and shows up before otterfrost and kills otterfrost to death

And starclan is like ":0! An emotionally vulnerable injured medicine cat who tried to help others!" And shoved otterfrost right into a kits body in riverclan. Young otterkitty sees the assasination of Riverclan's leader and is like "huh. thats weird." And doesnt TELL anyone?? so they just kind of live with that until their first gathering, when they remember "damn! That shadowclan leader fucking sniped me!"

So otterkit turned otterclaw turned otterstar makes it their mission to stop wolfstar and eventually kills him to death! The end

-

My favorite OC is a dragon furry named storm. When storm was a kid, their parents worked for a science organization (what kind of organization? not sure) and this guy that ran an assassination company (evil buddies inc) was like "oh brother this guy sucks" and blew up their apartment building!

Storms parents caught wind of this minutes before it happened, and tried to get everyone out via the fire escape. Storm didn't understand the urgency, and climbed down slowly, so when the blast came, they were the only one outside

Storm was the only survivor in their family along with a few others from different apartments, but the blast wounded their wings so badly that they were virtually unusable.

The city storm grew up in had a raging feral kid/orphan problem, so there was no real foster care system, so storm was like "alright guess i'll die" until some other street kids were like "bitch get your ass off the ground! Stop moping" and forced storm to take care of themself (self care 101).

A couple years go by, storm is kind of alone, but has been saving money for an apartment by doing tasks around the city. However, when they show up for the whole "is yr credit good or whatever" meeting, instead of some preppy marketing person, theres the bitch that killed storms parents (Elliot). Storm doesn't know that he was behind it, but is still like "whoa buckaroo i just wanted to have a place to store my couch" and elliot is like "don't you ever want to go apeshit?" and storm is like "um im not going to go kill people for a living" and elliot is like "cringe" and basically makes storms life worse and worse until storm goes and works for him!

So storm is like "alright" and elliot is like "alright" and then a doctor amputates what is left of storms wings because they were worried that it might be a hindrance on their efficiency and storm is like "wtf" and elliot is like "enough of that want to go kill people"

so yeah. storm goes and kills people and also is assigned to kill their best friend and storm is like "wtf" and elliot is like "if you don't do it someone else will lol. also kill their daughter to" and storm is like "cringe" and does it anyway except lets the kid get away.

So now elliot is like "im going to fucking kill you :)" except he DOESNT and instead just uses mind control on storm (similar to the mind control in black widow) and storm is like "cringe" but now goes and kills people.

Until the daughter of their best friend, A, shows up, and A is like "im going to fucking kill you :)" and tries and almost gets away with it except storm has lightning powers. which A did not know. And storm almost kills A to death. then the mind control is broken because A hits them really hard on the head and storm is like "wtf shit thats my best friends daughter" and nurses A back to health. And A is like "you killed my dad" and storm is like "im weewy sowwy" and A is like "okay ill forgive you if you help me kill your boss" so storm is like "alright" and kills elliot and dies in the process

-

My most recent oc is ben carpenter, who doesn't really have a fleshed out backstory, but he's a character living in the tma universe in nyc in the 1920s who is slowly turning to stone. He has no one to confide in, so starts a collection of books about the supernatural. He also has a sibling named fiona who he assumes abandoned him but was actually disowned by his parents and then almost died in an encounter with the dark that ruins its sense of memory (haha, and encounter with the dark leaves you IN THE DARK, im so clever)

[well-shit-im-a-morosexual-now]

Guess what Obey Me just dropped?

It starts with a ‘Lesson’, ends with a ‘41’ (and possibly a ‘42’)-

If you ever play it, pls answer this-

(Also, screenshots of the boys (mainly Satan's) clothes pls?)

-Lesson 35 Anon

Hey! Sorry this took longer than normal, I didn’t have my phone for a couple of days cause the its charging port? Area? Spot? I dunno - the place where you plug in the charger, was broken.

SPOILERS FOR LESSON 41 - 42

Right so lesson 41 starts off in a park (cause I’m almost 80% sure MC’s homeless, I mean they keep disappearing for months with no warning??? Is anyone paying their bills? Their rent?) where they meet Solomon. He asks them how they’re doing, they can either say good or just ask him how he’s doing.  He mentions about how he wanted to meet at this café but they were closed for remodeling (is2g this will be important later.  He asks them if they’ve been the homework he gave them that is harder than what they did at RAD but still just the basics which they will need if they want to work themself up to being able to perform summoning spells. MC says they’re dying to see everyone from the devildom and Solomon says he was worried they would be depressed cause it’s such a difference getting used to the quieter human world and that’s why he recommended the babysitting job to them. He asks whether they are ready to head to the interview and if they are nervous (why? They spent at least 2 years babysitting 7 all powerful ancient entities, this should be a breeze, akdhudsbkhs so I’m typing this out while replaying the game for the second time just to pick the options I didn’t before and Solomon just said the same thing I did about the brothers) Solomon then starts acting a little shifty, tries to tell something to MC but keeps quiet and send them off. MC pulls up at this huge ass house (Serenity Manor) which actually looks bigger than the HoL. Then ring the bell and the door is opened by Asmo and bro his clothes are cute af im dying, MC immediately shuts the door in his face without even saying a word jwdbkidjojS, they silently open the door again to see Levi, Asmo and Satan arguing. Levi’s clothes are also pretty cute, I like them better than his usual outfit, Satan’s should be burned to a crisp. Have you watched two and a half men? They show it here on repeat, and have you seen those ugly ass polo shirts Charlie wears? Satan’s shirt is a dress shirt version of those and I hate it. The cream coloured suit jacket is NOT a jacket but instead a long cream coloured coat it makes me want to throw up in my mouth. The fact that everyone else has clothes that look pretty good and that only Satan has this abomination just makes it that Satan has a horrible sense of fashion. MC immediately shuts the door again without saying a word only to come face to face with Beel and Belphie behind them who have just come back from shopping. Beel has a tattoo??? Like in his human form? He didn’t have one before? Belphie looks more or less the same, his outfit looks only slightly different from normal. They more or less drag MC inside even though MC’s brain is still breaking. All 5 of them then start arguing (about who’s late and Beel trying to eat everything in the shops etc) and it ends up freaking MC out so much they command the brothers to stay. Levi’s apparently being waiting around near the door all morning waiting for MC to turn up.

Satan complains about MC’s command being painful and MC can either apologize for it or say it’s their fault for startling them. Either way he says the surprise wasn’t his fault and it was all Asmo and Mammon’s plan. Asmo says ‘sowwy’ if he wasn’t so cute I’d be pissed. Asmo reveals that they’ll be spending their break up in the human world. Levi says they’ve never spent a long time in the human world and were hoping MC could show them around. Apparently Asmo convinced Solomon to lie to MC for them even though he didn’t want to, (when Solomon later texts MC to apologize for lying he says that Asmo asks him to do a lot of things that are troublesome but that he can’t seem to say no to him). Asmo says that even though he’s the one who initially brought up the idea it was Mammon who went all out on it. MC then asks how Mammon’s doing and Levi says “He’s good but actually not” just to be interrupted by someone asking for help from another room. MC walks into the Mammon hanging upside down cussing at Lucifer for hanging upside down from the chandelier cause ya sure he may have gambled away all their money immediately after coming here but at least he managed to save the house and how he doesn’t want ‘the human’ to see him like this. MC can either say ‘long time no see’ or ‘who the fuck are you calling ‘the human’. He freaks out either way & tells them not to listen in on his private conversations with himself. He welcomes them to the interview for the babysitting gig and they tell him he sure is big for a baby, tells them he’s the one hiring (the babies are his six idiot brothers) he tells them he needs to ask them a question to see if they are still sharp after being in the human world and asks what they would do if Lucifer hid his ‘adorable, sweet little brother’s credit card’ . they can either tell him where the card is or ask who this adorable, younger brother is. The first will make him happy the second will make him grumble about being the one asking questions. He tells them to cut him down and they’ll finish the rest of the interview. They command him to stay and cut him down, he complains about how it hurt to land on his back and if they couldn’t find another way to get him down, they tell him they missed him and that they were so happy to see him again and hug him. He blushes and grumbles about them hugging him out of nowhere, calls them a ‘big dummy’, says he feels the same way, swears, and then says he missed them, really missed them. I love the banter????? And that he somewhat constantly calls them dummy and this chapter just ends on his smiling blushing face. I also really like his outfit? That slight slip showing his shoulder? The fact that he has no sunglasses means that his blush is really noticeable???? All good.

Asmo takes MC on a tour of the house and takes them to a bathroom that’s an identical replica of his private bathroom in the devildom. He reveals that Barbatos opened portals between the devildom and this house so that they’ll be able to access certain rooms from the HoL, including their bedrooms and favourite rooms (I kinda like the HoL better cause it was colourful and had character? The Manor kinda looks like a blank white pristine slate which I guess makes sense but still). Also Asmo had asked Barbatos to make a portal to a club but he refused :/. Asmo says that barbatos and diavolo said they would visit. MC gets to ask about either Simeon and Luke (Asmo hasn’t heard from them), Diavolo (he’s seemed a little sad after MC left) and Barbatos (he’s the same as always). Asmo says that he’s missed MC a lot and asked if there’s something they should do to him. MC can either kiss him, kiss his nose or shake his hand (*SNORT*) and I’m forever bitter about the lack of a hug option if MC kisses his nose he calls them a tease and look I could not try the shake hand option because it’s hilarious given the context of the storyline (he says he’s gonna combust from frustration). Satan cockblocks Asmo (and admits to doing so) and steals MC away to show them a ridiculously large home theatre. While boasting about their high-tech theatre that could easily fit a 100 people Satan accidentally reveals that they’ve been in the human world for at least a week, MC is predictably pretty upset by that and Satan says that Asmo & Mammon were insistent about finding a perfect way to surprise MC. Realizing MC’s now going through kinda a depressed downward spiral Satan tries to offer reserving the room just for the two of them to watch whatever MC wants to, and when that doesn’t work asks them what he can do to make them feel better. They can ask him to either kiss them or meow. He blushes and complains but still does and makes them swear not to tell anyone and then tells them he got some movies he thought they’d like and asks what they are currently in to. If they say cat documentaries he’s surprised that those exist and blushes and says he needs to watch them with MC immediately only for Levi to cockblock him by saying there’s an emergency in the kitchen and he’s needed. It’s heavily implied that after Satan leaves that the emergency is greatly exaggerated. Levi then goes silent for while blushing and stutters before asking if MC wanted to go see what the outside looks like. Me, chanting under my breath: poolpoolpoolpoolpoolpool-

THERE’S A POOL JHVDHDBSJKDHJ IM SO HAPPY????? I haven’t seen a pool in so long that even a little game pool had me hyped :’)))) Levi says that Asmo insisted they have a pool and then the others started making demands too but all levi wanted was his games and henry. He also gets sweetly happy when MC asks to see Henry cause no one ever asks to see Henry. He also reveals that Henry has gotten slightly bigger (Me, side eyeing Henry 1.0: huh). Levi suggests gaming together till dinner is ready cause nothing beats the real thing despite the fact that they’ve been gaming online since MC left. Levi says he has always had when he’s with MC and how even though they aren’t currently playing yet he is enjoying himself. MC can either reply by saying they love him (which leads into a kiss) or cooing with what is a soft look on their face cause it makes levi blush and makes him ask them to stop looking at him like that. He gets cockblocked by Belphie who says Levi has a job to do and should get to it. While continuing the tour with Belphie, he asks them what they think of his outfit and whether he looks human (remember when Belphie wanted to wipe out the human race? A need he probably cultivated for thousands of years? And now he’s just cool with everything cause his heart got a boner for the random ass human he murdered?) MC hears some of the brothers arguing through a door that probably leads to the kitchen from the sound of it and belphie asks them not to listen in.  He takes them to their Devildom bedroom, says they thought about giving MC a bigger room but figured they wouldn’t like it. Belphie says that he really likes MC’s room and that even after they left he would come to nap in it though it wasn’t that peaceful cause the rest of his brothers would always be in the room too (I’m not crying!). Belphie rests his head on MC’s lap while they stroke either his hair or cheek. If they stroke his hair he says that they’ll put him to sleep but to continue. MC can either agree, pinch his cheek or tickle him. He says something about how he missed this and how it’s better than napping alone in their bed. They ask him where he went earlier with beel, he says they went out shopping and that they saw an ice cream truck and if the music playing meant that eating the ice cream made you start playing music out of your mouth and says he’d want to get ice cream with MC. MC falls asleep and wakes up to Beel carrying them. He says belphie was still asleep and he tried waking them up but it didn’t work and he notices that MC has lost weight and starts worrying about them not eating properly (I really love that it’s a continued theme that MC loses weight each time they leave? I mean without the constant parties and the big meals it makes sense plus with the continued theme that they start moping around when they are alone and that going from living with 7 others where meals are a joint and structured event to living presumably alone it makes sense that they would forget meals and ahh I just love it). Beel points out where they have lost weight by tickling them and MC retaliates after blushing and laughing and asking MC to stop, MC asks where they are going (all this happens while he’s still carrying them and he only lets them down when they get to his room and I just love that they’re both so chill and comfortable with each other) and he tells he needs to take them somewhere but first he need to get party crackers from his room. While he searches for them MC can either look under the bed (it’s full of snacks) or flop on his bed (Beel tucks them in). When Beel finally finds the crackers him and MC end up nose to nose and MC can either ask to kiss him or do that awkward ‘haha did you find what you were looking for’ thing, he’s silent then says he did, then blushes and says he spaced out for a bit and how he suddenly just realized that MC was really in front of him again and how happy he was (reminds me of when he was reunited with Belphie). Beel gets a text from Lucifer saying he has come back and asking Beel to bring MC.  

AND HOLY SHIT LUCIFER!????? Any attraction I had towards him instantly died and it’s not that he looks bad???? He just looks like a DAD/MOM. The turtleneck, the necklace, the glasses, the slacks just all of it? I can’t handle that. Also the brothers are having a reunion party in the balcony (which looks like it’s from The Bachelor which…yeah close enough). Mammon says that he’d wanted to see Mc as soon as they arrived and how awful it was that they couldn’t (whose fault was that) and that he felt like a dog whose owner was holding a treat away from him (each they’re separated and reunited Mammon comes back being more emotionally honest, man’s probably gonna propose after the third separation at this rate. Can he even be classified as a tsundere anymore? The others talk to MC about who did what to organize the party. Lucifer toasts to their reunion (and I realized that these idiots, MC included, have taken a 10 year old to a club a bunch of times). Lucifer notes how MC hasn’t been eating much and they say either they’re still in shock or that they have eaten (Lucifer gives Mc food that he made and that he’s proud of). He tells them that if they are feeling tired they can slip away, MC can either say they’ll stay here and have fun with the others – Lucifer is disappointed but understanding that MC would want to spend time with the others and Mammon ends up calling Mc over to get wasted – or MC can agree to leave with him – he ends up taking them to his room and immediately hugging them. While blushing he tells them that he missed them and had wanted to hug them the moment he saw them and had to fight himself to resist doing so in front of the others (At this point MC’s gonna return a third time to Lucifer already in a wedding dress saying his vows). MC can say they feel the same and he says that he knows and asks to kiss them or they can tease him about being sad when they were away and he just agrees. He says he’s been planning this since they asked the brothers for their favourite things but that it was hard to find a place to stay and he apologizes for the time it took and asks them to sleep in his bed for the night.

Lesson 41 ends and I still haven’t got a screenshot of mammon’s outfit cause the man was in our face for the entire lesson and refused to back away.

Lesson 42 starts with them having breakfast (on pristine white couches!??? My soul curled up and died on the spot) and praising human food. Satan complains about the sun and Levi cries about being able to watch anime right as they release now (also he has his longest anime title to date – it takes almost three speech boxes) Lucifer decides it’s time to set up ground rules and shifts for chores. Each brother suggests a game they are good at with the winner being allowed to choose the chores they wanted to do first, in the end they settle on playing rock paper scissors. Rock paper scissors ends up with Levi summoning Lotan, Beel summoning some legendary rock creature and Mammon almost dying (it reminds me a lot of the rock paper scissors my brother and I would play where instead of accepting the initial loss we would keep on calling out things that could counteract what the last person chose until someone ran out of ideas). Beel and MC end going to get groceries from one of those big open air markets (I have literally no idea what you call those in English). Beel says that the previous day the food looked so good that it was really hard to not eat everything and asked MC to stop him if he tried it today – they can either cover his mouth, cover his eyes or hold his hand. In the market Beel buys 5 chickens from the butcher who recognizes them from the previous day. He asks if they are celebrating anything and Beel – sweet innocent Beel who canonically doesn’t know what a threesome is says they are celebrating their first night living together and obviously the butcher takes it as ‘oh a sweet couple living together’ and not 7 children and their impromptu babysitter/therapist/family counselor/marriage counselor. The butcher gives them (really sound tbh) relationship advice (respect each other, take interest in each other but let each other have space to do their own thing). Later Beel’s like ‘holy shit human world butchers are amazing! Not only do they give you food but they also give you advice! Do you think we do all three of those things’ and MC’s like yeh. Okay but look, MC’s gonna have to go shopping with each of the others at some point and they’re all gonna act like couples in love and then the brothers will at some point end up going shopping with each other and yeah they’re gonna argue but it’s still gonna be obvious that they love and care about each other, at some point it’s gonna be obvious that they all live with each other, the butcher already noticed that belphie and beel stood out, he’s gonna notice that the others are weird af too, he’s gonna notice the less inconspicuous names like satan and lucifer. This poor man. Beel and MC run into Mammon and Satan who have abandoned lucifer and fled the house after Solomon came looking for MC and then offered to cook lunch while waiting for MC. They go get pizza from a place where one of satan’s tv shows were filmed (he geeks out in a very levi like fashion) and tells them that they should order ‘the usual’ because that’s what they do in his show and mc says yeah that’s not how it works. Beel’s already ordered and eaten a bunch of pizza and Mammon notes that they are freaking out the waitress. Satan decides to ask how MC’s apprenticeship is going and they talk about magic and Solomon for a bit. MC wonders if Lucifer is okay (he is not. He has been increasingly spamming the group chat asking the others where the fuck they are, who the fuck left him alone with Solomon and lunch and just you fucking wait till you get home I’ll make you suffer. The rest of the group remains silent.) Satan later decides to go visit a bookshop and Beel and Mammon go to a bakery to pick up ‘a dessert that’s to die for’ from a bakery for Asmo. If MC goes with Beel and Mammon – Mammon forgets the name of the dessert but tells MC what he remembers of it and Beel who has taken ‘a dessert to die for’ way too literally. Mammon has to keep telling him that ‘yeah no that’s not what that means’ multiple times. It’s a cute interaction that I really liked. Mammon lets beel buy whatever he wants from the bakery using Asmo’s credit card so now if Mammon fails to turn up for the rest of the season we know why rip. If MC goes with Satan he geeks out about a bunch of rare books and they end up getting lost in the bookstore and can either decide to stick together and find way out or race to find away out. The four meet up in front of the house and note a sense of foreboding coming from it and only remember they left Solomon in the house when they enter and come face to face with him. He tries to get them to have tea and sandwiches with them but they all make excuses about just having lunch (Beel struggles to say the words ‘I’m full’). But lucifer turns up with a sweet smile and says how Solomon had made him lunch and how it was so delicious he had asked Solomon to make tea and sandwiches for the others. I love how these demons all just accept this horrid food and that even though they make excuses they don’t complain to solomon’s face or outright refuse to eat it cause it’ll be rude and hurt his feelings???? Beel, Mammon and Satan suffer while Solomon talks about Mc getting a sorcerer’s (they’ll get a training one and not the actual thing) so that they aren’t limited to having to do spells only with Solomon. MC of course doesn’t really hear any of this cause they’re currently dying. That’s not even a joke – they start seeing spots and stars, they can’t hear what the others are saying, their life flashes before their eyes and they pass out.

MC wakes up in their room at night (the rooms are now light and dark depending on the time of day) and walks out of the room into the demon lord’s castle where they run into lil D no. 2 (who freaks out cause he mistakes MC for ghost and I just love our little demon son so much) who calls barbatos who says they have tea with diavolo. MC can tell barbatos it’s nice to see him again or say it’ll be nice to see diavolo (Barbatos only gets happy when you pick the second option and asks MC to tell diavolo that when they see him cause he’s). Barbatos talks about how it would be nice to visit the human world and that there’s so much he wants to learn from it in regards to cooking, Mc invites him over and offers to show him around. During tea diavolo mopes about having to stay in the devildom even though it’s technically his break too and how barbatos won’t let him come to the human world until he finishes his work but how he doesn’t seem to be able to make a dent in the work even with lucifer helping him as much as he can from the devildom (Chats show diavolo crying to lucifer about his work until lucifer gives him and offers to do what he can. Barbatos calls lucifer out on coddling diavolo). Diavolo says that without the others around he’s even more distracted (which is understandable? I’m less motivated to work when ik that my friends are free and having fun). Lucifer eventually texts diavolo to tell him to stop kidnapping their human and to pls send them back my brothers are about to burn down the kitchen. Levi, Satan and Beel have being trying to figure out human appliances in the kitchen cause even though they have tech in the devildom it’s not as advanced (I really loved the cauldron aesthetic of their devildom kitchen this one’s just white walls and steel). Satan’s insistent that the ice cream maker is to heat up soup. At some point it’s revealed that Beel eats the actual pot part of a hotpot as well. During dinner Asmo asks MC to come with him the next day to visit a café that’s been remodeled called Angel’s Halo

There are 2 locked chapters, presumably one is satan and mammon escaping from Solomon, no idea what the other is.

Sorry this took so long 35, I hope you see this!  Since this is already so long I’ll make a separate post for the screenshots

[dollyprincessollie]

Yooo. Kai 4 da character asks thing :-)

LETS GOOOOO

i should not be doing this bc i am really sick and need to go back to bed but its okay because i lov kai so much...

also unnecessary fun fact but as nuts as i am for keiji, kai was my first husband from yttd,,,,, legit was love at first sight i love him SO MCUh

spoiler warning i think???

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥  Why I like them

long haired men own me

OKAY KIDDING sort of FOR REAL i love his personality so much,, love me some level-headed men........

and also i think he has my fav backstory out of everyone in the game,,

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥  Why I don’t

I HAVE 0 REASONS TO DISLIKE HIM BYEee

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ Favorite line

his entire monologue to sara when he kills himself... legit bde moment

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥  OTP

KAI X MEEEE <3333

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ Brotp

him and sara... he coul be her dad older brother uncle type figure and im here for it....

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ Head Canon

im sick my headcanon machine is broken sowwy :(

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥  Unpopular opinion

i have none methinks...

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥  A wish

i WISH he would come here and take care of me i feel terrible

OK SERIOUSLY ive heard that some people theorize that he might be the person that keiji and sara find while looking thru the window in that one room behind the vent in chapter 2

and PERSONALLY i think that may have been midori

but wouldnt it be neat if that were kai?? :) i want my hubby back...

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥  An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen

going off of that....................... if he actually is still alive (which does have merit tbh bc his death easily LOOKS to be the most non-fatal) i dont want him to be kai but funked up and evi...

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥  5 words to best describe them

level-headed, calm, quiet, chill, and ....... pwetty ＊*♡( ⁎ᵕᴗᵕ⁎  ）

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥  My nickname for them

my brother and i legit call him a chad BECAUSE HONESTLY what he did at the end of ch1 p2 was A CHAD MOVE... YES bINCH...

[unproduciblesmackdown]

i am SO delighted to hear that the "detective and five people trapped on an elevator and one of them is the devil" movie is real and you saw it. also while trying to send this i accidentally clicked the Unfollow button (and then promptly refollowed), sorry about that

lmao i maybe wouldn’t’ve noticed, love Tumblr Notifications and how like, they display different on desktop vs mobile and the way it Condenses them is only so helpful cuz sometimes some of them only display for 0.2 seconds while i’m on mobile and it hasn’t Refreshed in a way that reshuffles everything and i can’t view that particular [Like from a certain person or smthing] ever again lmao like i hate this, it’s bad, just like that movie about people trapped on an elevator and a detective has to get them out and has to act fast b/c one of them is the devil

it is so stupid first of all like. it’s just overall not a great movie from Any of the angles it’s playing like. first of all the Detective is only around b/c he’s solving a nearby murder / death and making like. corny dumb “oh this is a Smart guy” observations about the Scene and someone is like “oh hey @ cops you’re already on the premises, come solve the mystery of Elevator Broke” like i don’t think that’s how it works and also i can’t even remember the reason they find this issue That pressing pre-realizing And One Of Them Is The Devil. maybe someone dies right off, idk. there is conflict on the elevator so naturally that’s a whole other thing like, we’re all trapped in this elevator together and maybe one of us is untrustworthy and liable to be dangerous to the rest of us like, i don’t know the Contrivance that makes these people think anything has to be done but just Stand Around for a while but it’s you know. that whole Thing where there’s a premise of “some shit is happening to Incite Conflict amongst strangers who are trapped in a bad situation together and they’re all apparently raring to judge each other’s moral fiber to decide who deserves Suspicion vs Protection.” but also, one of them is the devil

meanwhile on the outside it’s this dumb Cop Mystery Drama where this rando guy apparently sets aside the death he was investigating earlier to solve this elevator situation (i think eventually it’s revealed that that death was tied to the elevator situation all along. i think that the devil killed the guy. or something) and also, maybe there was Coincidentally some kind of heist going on at this place b/c i remember at some point the detective (and some partner there too involved in all this) like, find some tools hidden in a bathroom like “aha this was Used to do [whatever]” and despite having no idea what the details are i Know i remember this b/c of at the time going “oh my god that is so dumb Nobody Would Do This / this makes no sense” lol like. writing not great. and this was maybe Not the devil, but a regular separate scheme to. do something

also there’s some aspect where Main Cop has some tragic backstory and is like, not over it b/c it was so painful. i think maybe someone like hit and run his wife or something like that. you know how it goes. spoilers in that i think the person that the devil is here to kill (more on this devil assassination thing....) was Behind That somehow lmfao so it’s like really??? is that our resolution, that people’s stories are Converging in a very serendipitous way b/c the devil would like to give people emotional catharsis......idek. look, spoilers, this old lady who “dies” in the elevator relatively early on turns out to have been The One Of Them Who Is The Devil, Act Fast. and it was this weird thing where the devil is like “grr whoever i’m even here to Get in the first place is just Such A Bad Person that uhhh i guess i came here in person to take them to hell” like.....what tf kind of Lore......this is definitely going with “aaaah the devil is evil” approach, not any more kind of Neutral figure, but then in the end apparently the evil devil is just really Judgey and Disgusted by someone being A Bad Person like??? you ought to love this shit!!!!! and anyways the detective learns that One Of Them is The Devil b/c when they take him up to the security camera display hq it’s like a) look at this scary Moment where the elevator camera feed gets staticky and a scary face appears for a moment (im not sure if i could see what it was supposed to be lmfao) This Means Something and okay oh my god i reread the plot summary b/c for the life of me i couldnt remember the ending, it is so stupid oh my god

okay so first of all the Dead Person the detective was investigating had left like a suicide note like “i am killing myself b/c um. the devil approacheth” like wow okay right off the bat? amazing foreshadowing. why does this person Know this?? and why should he care b/c the devil is here apparently for a Special Soul Collection like, this has nothing to do with you, random guy?? you don’t even need to worry like. just stay home from work to avoid the fairly minor problems that occur (like MAYBE one guy dies in the course of this story but i think it’s a little ambiguous, meanwhile whoever Really Dies in th elevator was i think due to like, suspicion and infighting lmao. idk maybe the devil killed a few of them. it’s weird) but yeah the highlight is this

everyone please enjoy this scene. security guy ramirez is explaining the Devil Expertise courtesy of Where I Come From where toast falling jelly side down is evidence that the devil is hanging out in the elevator. 

while looking up “devil toast” the result immediately after that one was “the devil takes the toast” which is a devil takes the hindmost ytp which i feel is really fitting

it kind of undercuts the stakes i think when not only is the devil only sorta gently radiating Bad Luck but also is just super Righteous but like. yes it turns out that the devil is here to Claim a guy on the elevator was the same dude who Hit N Run the detective’s family (wife and kid apparently) those years prior......except like, it wasn’t even like oh he assassinated them On Purpose, it’s apparently already a Known Detail that although they ~never knew~ who killed detective joe’s family (idk what his name is idc) there was a Note left on the scene like “sowwy :(” like really? this is the Big Bad that the devil made a special corporeal visit for??????? and then, get this, when the devil is like “i’m not a dead old lady, i’m the devil, and i’m here to Get you b/c you accidentally killed a couple of people and i, the devil, am really disgusted by how sinful you are for that” the guy is like “yes that was me :’( i’m sorry” and then the devil is like “ah fuck you’ve Repented. i can’t take you to hell anymore. bye” like what!!! why did he only have to feel bad about it to get out of this whole situation when obviously he Felt Bad in the first place b/c he up and left a note like “[grimace emoji] aaa my bad” like, did he have to apologize To The Devil?? the lore i s2g. Jelly Toast Rules operating here i guess. 

anyways then the detective who witnessed this i guess is like “wow the guy who killed my family all those years ago but i’m still sad about it.....well i’m gonna arrest him now. but also, I Forgive Him.” oh and also for a while there the detective was so gritty he didn’t believe in The Devil b/c the vehicular manslaughter apparently made him think that human nature was evil enough to not need the extra help. so now he’s made the arc of getting uh, emotional closure on his family’s death by forgiving the dude who i guess super crashed into them on accident, And gets to know that the devil is real actually and he’s on the elevator but now Not b/c he was like “ah jeez thwarted by this guy uh, feeling bad about the accidental deaths even though he felt bad in the first place” and there was no other point to the detective being there b/c he didn’t Really do shit except i guess drive this sideplot where you are led to believe he Might figure out who the Bad Guy on the elevator is. (it is the devil. one guy has a crime record or something but, spoilers, he is trying to turn his life around with some good honest work as a security guard or something. idk)

it was amazing and very stupid and i was continually indignant b/c the writing was dumb and made no sense and just so fucking corny throughout. the entire movie is called “devil” and i remember it was like “tf is ‘devil’” and as soon as it involved an Elevator i was like omg omg is this And He Has To Act Fast Because One Of Them Is The Devil, and it was, so that was exciting. it was a dumb waste of time but also it was not b/c it was *slightly* so bad it’s good. mostly Not Even. but just watch the toast scene there b/c like. i think that’s this movie’s #1 contribution outside that post about the plot summary.