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rollingsins · 2 years

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all hers, part vi

summary: For as long as Tara could remember, she’d had this thing inside her. Ghostface!Tara origin story.

warnings: 18+ reference to murder.

word count: 2.6k

a/n: sorry this one took so long, appreciate all the love for this fic! let me know what you want to see next, looking to maybe take some more smutty suggestions for gf!tara ;)

For as long as Tara could remember, she’d had this thing inside her.

This hot, horrible, blackout anger that lived in her bones. Lurking just under the surface. It left her in shivers, cold sweats. It left her aching, panting. There was nothing quite like it.

Her Dad used to call it “The Rage”.

“Get a handle on The Rage, Tara.” He’d warn before dropping her off at school, “Remember. It’s just an emotion. Like any other emotion. You can control it.”

He was wrong, Tara couldn’t control it. No matter how hard she tried.

She couldn’t control it the day Peter Millwood stole her crayons. She’d whacked him across the face with her ruler with all the might of a four year old girl. Might have done worse had Mrs. Parker not frog-marched her straight to the Principal’s office.

She couldn’t control it the night her older sister Sam had stolen her barbie when she was six. She’d wrapped her hands around Sam’s throat, choking, choking, choking until Sam was screaming and her mother was prying her off and smacking her so hard over the backside it left angry, red welts for days.

Her childhood was scattered with incidents like that. Possessive. Child councilors had whispered to her father. Doesn’t share well with others.

They’d prescribed therapy sessions, pills that made her so sleepy she couldn’t concentrate in class. Her Dad hung up a poster on the back of her door; a picture of a thermometer. A sliding scale of five numbers: one, a little picture of a cartoon boy smiling, was happy. Five was a little old man, scowling and angry.

She’d gone to their sessions over and over. Their words in one ear and out the other. Nothing they said ever worked. “Five.” She’d growled at her father in the backseat of the car on the way home from a soccer match. A girl from the other team had tried to take the ball from her. The coach had stopped Tara before she could tackle her to the ground.

“One.” She’d announced happily sitting in the nurse's office after recess with a swollen hand. A boy much bigger than her had tried to bully her out of her lunch money. Tara had punched him square in the jaw.

Months flew by. Tara watched as her father turmoiled; no pill, no therapy session could fix her.

The night before Tara turned thirteen, her father walked out on them.

Sam blamed herself, but Tara knew the truth. It was her. It was the Rage. He’d spent every spare dime he had trying to fix her but it was impossible. She was a lost cause, after thirteen years, he’d finally figured it out.

Her mom seemed to think so too. She buried herself in work, business trips, vacations, boyfriends. Anything that kept her away from Woodsboro. Away from Tara.

Tara cried herself to sleep for two months straight the night he left.

The Rage had cost her a father, a mother and a sister. It wasn’t what she wanted. She didn’t like the things it made her do. It was like this thing inside of her that took over. Like a demon, swallowing her whole. It was angry, violent. It wanted to hurt.

And nothing or no-one could help her.

Sam moved out. Tara learned to spend her nights alone. She taught herself how to make simple foods, like pasta and steak. Her Dad hadn’t taken much when he’d left, so Tara worked her way through his film collection. She didn’t care much for the westerns, or the gangster flicks. She scrunched her nose up at the heist films and the rom-coms. But the horror movies? It was love at first sight.

She worked her way through the Halloween movies first. Then Nightmare on Elm Street. Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

Finally, came the Stab movies.

She’d grown up in Woodboro, she’d heard the stories about Ghostface.

Stupid name, she’d first thought. Stupider mask.

But the more she watched the more he grew on her. He began to fascinate her. His motives were always asinine, much like The Rage. The hairs on the back of her neck stuck up at every kill. She became obsessed. First it was the movies, then it was the books. She read every article, spent countless hours on youtube - interviews, theories, facts. She watched them all.

By the time she’d finished middle school, Tara could recite every stab movie by heart. Better than that - her focus on the Stab movies meant The Rage had finally lessened.

She didn’t flip out about trivial things anymore, like someone borrowing a pen, or eating her last stick of gum. Instead, she pictured herself in a Ghostface mask. The blade between her fingertips as she drove the knife deep into said pen-thieving, gum-stealer’s chest.

Then it had been enough. Just the thought of doing it. Back when she didn’t have anything worth stealing.

And then she met you.

It was like fate, kismet. Just like all the tales in all the stupid rom-coms she couldn’t stand to watch.

She’d been sitting in biology class, doodling in the line of her margin. When she’d looked up, you were there. Beautiful, ethereal. Her heart had almost stopped the moment you’d locked eyes.

She knew right then and there you were destined to be hers. The Rage purred. It coiled from her around you like an invisible string, tying your fates together.

The next day she’d asked you out. The next week she’d kissed you, soft and slow, under the gentle hum of your porchlight. And the week after that you were hers. Officially.

It was perfect. You were perfect.

Her special, perfect thing.

Instead of lonely nights on the couch, watching movies by herself, you were there.

She cooked for you, made you all the recipes she’d spent her early teens learning. Showed you all her favorite horror movies. Spent nights on nights making feverish love to each other. She was your first, and you were hers. Not two months in, naked and entwined, she told you she loved you for the first time.

She was completely and utterly enamored with you.

“Tell me about your first kiss.” You had whispered one night, laid across from her on the sofa.

Tara’s first kiss had been awful. With a boy from middle school who hadn’t bothered to take his gum out. You’d giggled at that.

And then she’d made a colossal mistake: she’d asked you about yours.

Aaron was his name, you’d recalled. He was cute. He’d made your stomach flip. Sometimes you’d see him in the halls. He had long hair now, and he didn’t really look too dissimilar to Tara. You’d told her so. Nudged your elbow in her stomach.

“Maybe I have a type.”

Tara had felt herself get light-headed. Her mouth prickled uncomfortably. The hairs on the back of her neck stood up.

Her heart hammered. White hot jealousy coiled through her veins. Her stomach dropped; It was back, worse than she’d ever felt it before. She could feel The Rage taking over.

Not at you, never at you.

Aaron. Some punk kid with long hair who had dared touch you before she even knew you.

Her hands itched, she’d needed to hurt something. Someone. Aaron perhaps.

She imagined him under her, screaming out as she drove her knife into his throat.

“You okay, baby?” You’d asked. Your hands on her back, rubbing softly, “I was just kidding.” You leaned in, pressed a kiss to her cheek, “You’re way cuter than Aaron.”

Tara had kissed you hard. Shelved The Rage.

The Rage had ruined everything good in her life, it wasn’t about to take you as well. She’d do everything in her power to protect you from it.

English class. Her knee was bouncing.

Withdrawal maybe, from you. It was the only class you didn’t share together. You’d been dating for months now, barely a moment without her. Everyday you were hers, The Rage got stronger.

It wasn’t just Aaron. You’d had a girlfriend before her, Sadie. You still shared a class together. The Rage wanted her gone, just like Aaron. Your best friend, Chase, watched you with moon eyes. You never noticed but Tara did. The Rage did. It coiled inside her, beating its fists against her chest, screaming to be let out.

She was pale today, dark circles underneath her eyes. She hadn’t slept a wink. She’d held you tight all night, gripping you as if Aaron or Sadie or Chase was about to break in and steal you from her.

Over her dead body.

In fact she was so exhausted, she’d thought she’d imagined it when she heard the boys two rows in front of her saying your name. She tilted her head, listened a little harder.

“YN. I have Math with her.” Sounded one of the boys. The other one groaned. “Lucky, dude.”

“Tell me about it. She’s so fucking hot.”

Tara leaned in. Gripped her pencil so hard it snapped. The blood rushed to her ears as she felt The Rage taking over.

“I might try to hit that this weekend. She’s always at Freeman’s parties.”

The other boy had scoffed. “Dude. She’s with Tara Carpenter. Good fucking luck.”

“Please.” Leered the first boy, “Chicks dating chicks is hot and all, but I bet she’s missing the D. All it would take is a couple of drinks and she’ll be all over me.”

He had leaned back in his chair with all the swagger of an eighteen year old virgin.

“Besides. Who knows. Carpenter’s pretty hot too. Maybe she’ll join in.”

Tara didn’t remember getting home.

She was shaking. Blood rushing to her ears. She’d got into the shower, fully clothed. Turned on the facet, straight to cold, hoping she could shock it out of her system.

One, two, three. The breathing exercises her Dad had taught her.

Five, five, five. Kill him, kill him, kill him.

It had never been this strong before. This wild. When she was a child she’d wanted to hurt, sure. She’d want to punch, or kick, or choke. In her fantasies she stabbed people - but it wasn’t real, it was just a daydream. This time, she’d wanted to kill him. A fantasy wasn’t enough.

One. Two. Three.

The cold water wasn’t working. She turned it to hot. Let the water scald her skin.

One. Two. Three.

She let out a long, dry sob. It felt like her insides were burning. Rage filled every part of her - from the painful throb of her chest to the fire-like blood flowing through her veins. She could feel her cheeks red, angry.

One. Two. Three.

“Baby?” Her head jerked up. It was you. You pried open the bathroom door.

“Tara?” You stared for a moment.

She looked a sight. Fully clothed, shoes and all, sat at the bottom of the shower dry heaving.

You were at her side in an instant.

“Baby.” You’d cooed as you pulled her to her feet, “What happened?”

The Rage pounded at her chest, like angry fists trying to claw through her ribcage. She could barely speak. You had turned off the facet, pulled her soaking body into yours.

“Come on, baby. Let's get you out of these wet clothes.”

You wrapped her in a towel, dropping to your knees to untie her shoes. She stood, soaking wet and shivering as you pulled jeans down her legs.

“You’re freezing.” You’d said. Wrapped her tight in your arms. Her body was shaking, but it wasn't because of the cold. If anything, she felt too hot. You had rubbed her arms, kissed her forehead. She’d buried her face in your chest, her hands gripping tight around your waist.

Mine. The Rage growled. You’re mine.

You’d fussed over her. Drying her hair with a towel, trying to coax her into bed.

When you’d leaned over her, pulling the sheets up to her neck, she had grabbed you by the wrist.

“YN.” She murmured, “YN. Baby.”

“It’s all right, sweetheart.” You had said, “I’m here. I’m just going to get you a hot water bottle and then I’ll be right back-”

Tara shook her head, tugging you down a little harder.

You let out a quiet gasp as she grabbed you by the hips, pulled you down to her.

“Shhh.” She’d murmured. Wild eyes. “I need to fuck you. Now. Please.”

You hadn’t put up much of a protest. She was feverish. Angry. Rough. Each thrust of her hips sent shockwaves through your entire body.

“Mine.” She had growled in your ear as you came hard around her fingers.

But not even fucking you could satiate The Rage. It thumped, still there, ever present. It was tormenting her. Flashes of you on your back, the boy from biology thrusting deep inside you. Another flash, you on your hands and knees, him pounding you into the mattress. It made her sick. It made her hands itch with anger.

It’s you or him. The Rage sing-songed at her. Stick your knife in him before he can stick his cock in her.

Your fingers on her cheek had snapped her out of it, only for a moment.

“Tell me what’s wrong, sweetheart.” You’d said. “Where did that come from?”

She’d looked down at you: lips swollen from her wild kisses. Angry red marks on your hips from where she’d grabbed you and held you down. She’d swallowed hard. She knew what she had to do.

“Don’t worry.” She’d said. Pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, “I had a problem. But I think I know how to fix it.”

She’d dropped you home later that night.

Then, she drove into town and bought herself a Ghostface mask.

She was spiraling.

She could feel it, thrumming, taking over. She was losing control.

The first murder was sweet relief. She hadn’t meant to kill two of them. Dan was his name, the awful boy who had plotted to get you drunk and steal you from her. She’d been halfway through tearing her dagger down his stomach when his older brother had walked in.

She’d had to kill him too. No witnesses. She did it quick, felt kind of bad about it afterwards.

The boost of serotonin at the look on Dan’s face when she’d driven her knife into his stomach more than made up for it.

For the first time in her life The Rage was satisfied.

But it wasn’t to last. It itched at her, the fact there were still people out there that had known the taste of your lips on their mouths. The Rage wanted them dead. Tara wanted them dead. Ghostface wanted them dead.

It was far too much to fight off her natural instincts. She was tired of fighting it. Exhausted. Now she’d known the feeling of her knife sinking deep into someone’s flesh, she didn’t think she could stop it even if she tried.

Aaron was next. She’d slit his throat while he begged for mercy.

Then Sadie. She’d stabbed her twelve times in the back. Once for every day you’d been hers.

Then Chase was all that was left.

And the worst had happened.

“Don’t be scared.” She’d murmured as you stared back at her, eyes wide and fearful. Lip trembling. Chase’s blood still dripping off her hands, “I would never hurt you.”

It was true. She’d never hurt you. Not even if you had run from her that night. Not even if you'd called the police. She’d turn her knife and drive it through her own heart before she’d ever lay a finger on you.

But you hadn’t run. You’d stayed, loved her despite the monster that lived inside her.

The Rage had taken everyone else, but not you.

Mine. It murmured everytime she was close to you. Sometimes she’d say it aloud. You’d nestle into her, hold her tight.

Yours.

Next part

#ghostface!tara #tara carpenter #scream #tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x you #tara carpenter x fem reader #ah #fanfiction #mine #jenna ortega #jenna ortega x reader

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featherandferns · 1 year

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pirates (fic)

jj maybank x fem!reader | shamelessly and obviously inspired by taylor swift's 'seven'

content warning: mentions of abuse (physical)

word count: 9k. roughly

blurb: if you ever needed to find yourself or jj maybank, one would recommend you head to pirate's cove, no matter the age or day.

The water was tepid. There was some lingering woodsy fragrance, probably from the cedar trees that towered high all around the waterside, alongside something undeniably fresh in the air. JJ waded in the murky water. The ground was warm with sunlight that flitted through the canopy of trees. As it illuminated the leaves, there was a strange greenish hue that overcame everything. The water plants and reeds only added to it, making the place feel peaceful and serene. In one hand he held a net, and another a bucket. JJ was searching for frogs. His father had told him it was season for them and JJ had taken that as his summer-break mission.

There was a ripple in the water and something that wasn’t short of a ‘splash’, and JJ spun around in time to see a frog leap from the water and onto a moss-covered rock. He grinned.

“Got ya,” he muttered to himself.

Slowly, carefully, he approached. Net at the ready, he continued to ease towards it. ‘Slowly now, JJ’, he told himself. ‘Slowly’.

A sudden scream ripped through the trees.

The frog leaped away for safety and JJ, in the fright of it all, stumbled backwards and tumbled into the water. It came up to his shoulders, his tiny body almost fully submerged, and he swore out like he had heard his father do. Somehow, it made him feel slightly better. Before he could get to his feet, the scream came again. It sounded high, but there was no telling if it was girl or boy. It was probably somebody playing around. He rolled his eyes, frog now gone, and got to his feet. Just as he went to get back to frog spotting, he heard it again. Only, this time:

“Help!”

His head spun around to where it came from. That didn’t sound like no joking. He waded out the water as quick as he could, feeling as if it were pulling at his legs to keep him from land. Managing onto dry ground, he looked around through the thick forestry for where it came from.

“Come on,” he mumbled to himself. His little legs were a little scratched up from the rocks and dirt he’d fallen on in the water. As the air got to the tiny cuts, making them sting.

The scream came again, this time louder and more panicked. JJ started off in the direction of it, ditching his bucket but holding onto his net. He raced towards the sound, perfecting his course with each one that came, until he stopped at a bank.

There stood a girl on a mud bank.

You couldn’t have been older than seven. You were surrounded by marsh water. Hair falling around your shoulders as if the sea had churned you up and spat you out. Your cheeks were wet and eyes wide, focused on something below in the water.

JJ squinted as he tried to focus. Driftwood?

The wood shifted closer to the bank and you opened your mouth in a screech.

“Gator,” JJ said.

Your head darted up at the sound. You locked eyes with JJ. More tears came.

“Help me!” you cried. “Please!”

JJ looked around. Where was his dad? Wasn’t there somebody else here? Could nobody else hear you hollering like someone being murdered out in daylight?

“It’s getting closer!” you wailed. JJ watched the gator slowly slink towards you, as if taunting.

“Okay, okay,” he said, nodding. “Lemme think, alright? You’re gonna be fine.”

“Hurry,” you continued to sob.

JJ’s young mind was racing. He thought back to his mother’s lessons when they were sat out in the sun the other week. Snakes don’t like dogs and gators don’t like noise? Was that it? He looked down at the net in his hand. It was a long stick, at least half his height. If he were to disturb the water and yell, maybe it’d change course? That’d give you enough time, perhaps?

“Alright,” he said, voice trembling. He looked to you again and, as if you could feel his gaze, you looked up from the gator. Clearing his throat, he tried to make his tone more demanding like his pops. “Alright, here’s what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna try and distract him over here, and you’re gonna make a run for this here bank.”

“What?” you gaped. “I…I can’t do that!”

“You gotta! Run as fast as you can, alright! Keep running that way, back to the houses,” JJ instructed, pointing to his right. Your lip trembled. “You can do it, alright? I’m gonna be right behind ya.”

You stared at him. Looking back down at the gator, you seemed to consider his plan. Then, meeting his eyes again, you pursed your lips, sniffled, and nodded.

“Okay.”

“Okay,” JJ said, nodding himself. He swallowed his fear, squared his shoulders, and moved to the left of the bank. Grabbing another large branch, struggling only slightly with the weight, he took a deep breath. Then, splashing the water as hard as he could, he began to yell. “Come here gator! Come on!”

The moment the gator turned; you took off running. Your small body met the water and you started to swim as fast you could. JJ hit the water harder now, yelling louder.

“Come on gator boy! Come on!”

The frantic splashes of your front stroke seemed to catch the gator’s attention more so. You weren't looking behind you, eyes focused on the land.

“Come on! Come for me!” JJ practically pleaded.

The gator stayed still a moment. Then, slowly, began to sulk towards JJ.

His victory and smile were only brief, as his prepubescent brain caught onto the fact that a gator was making way to him.

Glancing to you, he saw you crawling onto the land, coughing and panting. You began to race towards the houses, just as JJ has instructed. Following suite, he ditched his net and branch and took off after you.

“Keep going!” he hollered. “Keep going!”

The pair of you ran and ran and ran. You ran until you were out of the marsh, out the of the clearing of the trees, and out onto the main street of the neighbourhood you were in. You finally stumbled to a slow, and eventually a stop. JJ copied. The two of you hunched over, panting heavily, hands on knees.

“Oh my God,” you whispered to yourself.

JJ felt as if he couldn’t get enough air in his lungs. It certainly didn’t help when you flung yourself at him, arms wrapping around his neck.

“Thank you!” you cried.

It took a moment for him to react. Then, he wrapped his scrawny arms around your frame.

“Hey, hey,” he coaxed, rubbing your back like his mom did with him when he was poorly. “You’re alright now.”

You nodded against him but continued to cry, nonetheless.

“I thought I was dinner for a second,” you laughed sadly. JJ chuckled too.

“You scared off my frogs,” he told you. You laughed harder, untangling yourself from him.

“Sorry,” you said, wiping your cheeks.

“What were you doing on that bank, anyway?” JJ asked.

You looked down at her feet nervously, almost embarrassed.

“There was this real pretty butterfly on there and…I just wanted a closer look.”

“Don’t nobody tell you that’s gator land?” JJ said. You looked back up to him and shook your head.

“No! I just…I wasn’t thinking!” you replied, becoming tearful again.

JJ reeled himself in.

“It’s alright,” he said. “It gets confusing out there.”

You smiled tentatively and nodded. Sniffling once more, you stuck out a hand and introduced yourself.

JJ took it and gave it a shake like he’d seen adults do at school and his daddy’s work. “JJ.”

“Nice to meet you, JJ.”

“Nice to meet you too.”

You both stood a moment and smiled at one another. “I’m sorry about your net.”

“It’s alright. Had it for ages.”

“I can get you a new one,” you told him. Then, as if a light bulb had gone off, you said, “I have a spare one I think!”

JJ hesitated. His mom had told him not to be greedy of people. ‘We don’t take charity, JJ.’

“You don’t have to,” he hesitated.

You shook your head firmly and took one of his hands in yours. You began to drag him as you set off walking down the road.

“Yes, I do. You saved my life, after all.”

JJ couldn’t really argue with that logic. Hand in hand, the two of you walked to your house. As you went, you asked about the frogs. JJ told you as much as he could remember reading. There was a picture book in school about them with a few easy-to-read facts put here and there. It was far more interesting than the maths the teacher had been going on about, so he’d read it under his desk. You nodded along and listened fervently. At some part on the walk, you'd started playing frogs. Ribbiting and hopping around, even playing leapfrog. Eventually, you came to your house.

JJ paused as you started walking up to it. When you noticed he was no longer by your side, you turned around.

“What?” you asked.

“It’s just…I live just down the road there,” JJ said, pointing. “Near the water.”

Your smile came back, wide and pure. “No way!”

He smiled back. “Yeah!”

You raced over and grabbed his hand, pulling him around the back, to the shed.

“We’re gonna be best friends!” you cheered, making JJ laugh.

He didn’t hate the sound of that. Making friends at school hadn’t been all that successful. There was only one boy who he truly got on well with, and he was called John B. JJ wasn’t sure why his name was John B, but then again he wasn’t completely sure why everyone called him JJ. He liked your name. It was different, a bit like you.

You came to the shed and pulled it open. Going through the tools and such, you dug about until you found a spare net buried amongst spider webs near the back.

“I knew it!” you triumphed, holding it up. Walking over to JJ who stood out in the late afternoon sun in her garden, you stopped before him. “Kneel.”

JJ did as demanded.

Tapping him on each shoulder, you announced with a laugh, “I now pronounce you sir knight JJ…Uh, what’s your last name?”

“Maybank.”

“Sir knight JJ Maybank!” you said, loud and proud.

JJ giggled as he got to his feet, giving a bow. He then began to wave like he’d seen the English queen do on TV once. You began to applaud and cheer, pretending to bow to him like he was Jesus walking into town on palm Sunday.

Someone called your name. "Is that you?” a voice called from the house.

The pair of you turned to see a woman stood on the patio, using her hand to keep the sun from her eyes.

“Yeah, ma!”

“Come on in! Dinner’s nearly ready!” She called.

You nodded and looked to JJ. You handed him the net.

“What’re you doing tomorrow?”

“Nothing, I don’t think,” JJ replied.

“Want to play pirates?”

“Sure,” he said, not fully sure what pirates involved but very interested, nonetheless. Maybe he could see if John B was free too. The three of you might make good ruffians.

“Okay,” you grinned. You flung your arms around his neck again before racing towards your house. As you went, you called out your farewell to him.

“Smell you later, Maybank.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*

The creek had quickly become the usual haunt of JJ and yourself. It was a little bit from the waters near his house, more secluded by forestry, though not as much as the marsh. You still got twitchy about going in there after the alligator incident. JJ couldn’t really blame you. The thing would’ve eaten you in one bite.

You'd found a small nook of fresh water, deep enough to swim. There was a rope swing tethered to a branch which made your secret spot feel only slightly spoiled, under the notion that someone else had gotten there first. Never the matter, every time you went, it was empty. Your whoops and hollers, and the narrative of whatever make-believe game you had come up to play, filled the air. It probably carried through to JJ’s house, which was nearest the spot that only JJ and you knew.

“Ahoy!” you growled, jumping out from behind a bush. “Gimme your gold and nobody gets hurt.”

“If I’m getting hurt then there’s gonna be two funerals!” JJ returned loudly as he unsheathed his sword.

You advanced forward with yours, already posed for fight. JJ slashed in return and the two of you heard the clink of metal hitting metal. You swung and sparred, dancing around the bank of the water. Bare feet treaded over pine needles and rotting, fallen leaves, damp from the water from when the rain pushed the level to rise yesterday.

Gasping, you ducked to avoid a deadly swing of JJ’s sword to your head.

“You’re gonna regret that, matey!” you threatened, and with that, drove him into the water. Before you could break free, JJ was pulling you in with him, and the two of you became submerged.

The water was cold. The continuous flow of it meant there was no time for the sun to heat it, least of all through the leaves above them. There was only one break in the trees where you could see the blue sky fully. You broke to the surface first, then JJ. The two of you were grinning as they clambered to your feet. The water came up to your waists, though only to your parent’s middle thighs most probably. Not that your parents knew their spot. This was sacred ground. When you'd found it, you had demanded that JJ keep it a secret.

“Cross your heart, won’t tell no other,” you'd said. JJ did as you asked and you grinned that same carefree grin as you copied. JJ was still warming up to ask youif John B could join. As the summer had gone on, he’d become closer and closer to Big John’s successor.

“You’ll never find me gold!” JJ announced, holding his sword above his head with one arm. “It dies with me!”

“As will I!” you countered loudly.

Another battle, bloodier than ever, and JJ ended up on his back on the wet bank, dripping from head to toe. His t-shirt was drenched, sticking to his sun-kissed skin, and you stood over him in your sopping blue summer dress. Your skin sparkled with the sheen of the water under the sunlight. It was as if the heavens were blessing you.

Your sword’s tip met his chin, driving his head backwards and up.

“Any last words, Maybank? Your crew is nowhere in sight,” you snarled.

JJ grinned. “Kiss my ass.”

You couldn’t help but gasp out a laugh. Taking advantage, JJ batted the sword off of him and drove his into your chest in one fluid motion. You stumbled backwards with another gasp, this time more dramatic. Holding the handle of the sword, you gently pulled it from her chest.

“You’ll rue this day,” you warned weakly.

Then, you tumbled backwards into the water to meet your untimely demise.

A hand searched for your arm and wrapped around your bicep, pulling you up to sit.

“What does ‘rue’ mean?” JJ asked you.

You sat in the water.

“I don’t know,” youreplied. “I just heard them say it in a movie once.”

“Hm,” JJ thought.

He sat himself beside you. You were no longer pirates battling over treasure. Instead, you were best friends for the summer. At that age, of seven-turning-eight, friendships come fast and easy. All what matters is if you’re any good at gallivanting and sword fighting, or running secret missions against the Russians and English, or racing from one house to another. Not what clothes you wear or how much money you have, or if you’re a kook or a pogue.

“I should probably go home soon,” JJ said. The sun was getting crisper, more orange, warning of dusk.

“You could stay for dinner at our house if you like,” you offered.

JJ thought it over. “I’d have to ask my parents.”

“Okay. I can come with you, if you like.”

“That’s alright,” JJ said. He got to his feet and you got to yours. “Come on.”

The two of you made their way out of the hiding spot and back into real life. A slight shiver had begun to run up your back now that you weren’t racing around in battle. It was a chillier night. You came to JJ’s house first. He hesitated as he looked up at the door. There was a faint ruckus coming from inside. You stood beside him and stared up. He’d been in your house plenty of times, but you’d never been in his. Come to think, you'd never met his parents.

“You gonna ask?” you wondered.

JJ didn’t look at you as he nodded. His eyes remained focused on the door.

“Yeah. Just…wait here a moment,” he said quietly.

JJ approached the house and made his way up the porch steps slowly, then opened the shutter. To the back door he went. He took a breath before pushing it open and walked into his home.

You stood in the garden and waited.

The ruckus was getting louder and it began to sound like voices, shouting. A woman and a man. There was the sound of something being shoved, maybe a table, and then a loud smash of a plate. You gasped and felt your heart begin to pick up. This wasn’t the same sort of heartbeat as when you were battling JJ on the water banks. This was true fear. The type you'd felt when you were face to face with the gator. It only seemed to speed up the louder the hollering got.

“Leave her alone!” you heard JJ’s young voice yell.

A crisp, clean noise echoed in your ears.

Skin hitting skin.

JJ’s unmistakeable screech.

You couldn’t stop yourself from taking flight. You raced to your house, up the street.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

There was the sound of something tapping. It wasn’t a regular tapping, like a leaky drain dripping outside. It came and went for ages, then again, maybe louder or quieter. You groaned and tucked your head under her duvet, hoping it would pass. It wouldn’t. You tossed your sheet off and flicked on your lamp. Staring to the window, you waited for it to come again. For a long while, it didn’t. Then: clink.

“Are you joking me?” you mumbled sleepily, getting up. You trudged to the window and pulled up your blind. It was dark outside. The sound of crickets and a distant owl hooting was the only sound you were met with when you pushed the window up and open. Looking around, there was nothing save for your back garden.

“Psst!”

You frowned and looked down. There stood JJ. He was in his pyjamas, barefoot.

“JJ?”

He replied with your name as if checking, nervous. You heard him sniffle.

“What are you doing? It’s really late,” you yawned, rubbing your eyes to help them adjust.

JJ rubbed his arm.

“I know,” he said. “I’m sorry.”

“Are you okay?” you asked, trying to keep your voice to a whisper. JJ looked up at you again and now, with your eyes adjusted, you could make out tear streaks.

“Can I sleep over, do you think?”

Glancing briefly to your bedroom door, you wondered what your parents might say. They liked JJ for the most part. He was polite when he came around. They knew he made a good friend for their daughter. Besides, it was the summer break. Why couldn’t you have a sleepover? You looked back down to him and nodded.

“Can you climb up?”

You lived in a lodge, the same as most of the people on the cut. It was elevated from the ground by a meter or more. JJ nervously eyed up the wall before shaking his head.

“Do you have a rope or something?”

You turned around and searched your room. You could tie together your bedsheets and blankets, like they did in the movies. No, that wouldn’t work.

“Ah,” you said.

You spotted a skipping rope hung up on the back of your bedroom door. Grabbing it, you came back to the window and lowered it down. JJ wasn’t particularly large. You were the same height and nearly the same weight. His shoulders were a little broader and his legs a little longer, but save for that, you were equals. You believed you might be able to tug him up.

“Grab on.”

JJ began to climb up the wall, using your rope to help. You struggled as you held it steady, managing his weight only just. He came to the windowsill and got a grip, clambering in. You helped him step down into your room. In the full light of your bedroom, you could make out his running tears. On his left cheek was a bright pink mark, almost the perfect shape of a hand.

“Oh JJ,” you mumbled.

That only seemed to make him cry more. You quickly wrapped her arms around him in a hug. It made you feel better to be hugged whenever you scraped your knee or fell off your bike. JJ hugged you back, crying into your shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” he wailed, voice small and fragile like a fixed China plate.

“You don’t gotta be sorry,” you told him quietly.

When JJ had cried most of his tears, you pulled away and closed your window. JJ made his way to your bed, burying himself under the pink and orange duvet. He mumbled something about his head hurting. You closed the blinds, climbed in too, turning off your lamp. You tucked your white childhood bear, named August bear, under one arm.

You lay in silence for a moment. This was different to the other sleepover you'd been to. You'd only been to one, for a girl classmate’s birthday. The other girls and you had spent all night whispering, giggling about anything and everything. The birthday girl’s mom had shushed you several times. Here, all there could be to hear was JJ’s shaking breaths and occasionally sniffs.

“JJ?” you whispered. It was dark now and you couldn’t make out his face.

“Yeah?” he whispered back.

“Can I tell you something?”

“Yeah.”

“I think…I think your house is haunted,” you told him quietly.

JJ sniffed. “Why’s that?”

“Well, your dad’s always mad,” you explained in a hush. “I think something in there takes control of him and…the ghosts are messing with you all.”

JJ’s face was slowly coming into view. His pale skin and blue eyes. Thin lips, still trembling, and nose redden from crying. “You think so?”

“Mhm,” you said.

You found his hand under the blanket and clasped it tightly.

“I think you should come live with me and…and we can be pirates, and sleep at sea, out in the secret spot, and never have to answer to anyone ever again. We won’t have to go to school when summer ends. And you won’t have to hide anymore.”

“That sounds nice,” JJ yawned.

Contagiously, you yawned too. “Yeah. It does.”

Closing your eyes, you felt herself beginning to drift off once more. Your hand remained enclosed around JJ’s. A strong grip, tight like a bowline knot. Then, JJ whispered your name.

“Mhm?”

“Thanks.”

“Anytime, smelly,” you hummed.

~*~*~*~*~*

A tapping at the door came. Three rhythmic knocks. Your face lit up and you got up from the breakfast table to answer it.

“Coming!” you called. You'd grown a little over the last school year and didn’t need to go on your tiptoes no more to open the door. On the other side stood JJ, smiling.

"Morning smelly!"

“Morning,” he said. He walked into the now familiar house. Two years of friendship meant he had become a local in your household. “Did I miss breakfast?”

“Nope,” you said, walking to the table with him.

“Morning JJ,” your mom said. She plated him up two pancakes and handed him the syrup as he took the spare seat around the table.

“Morning,” JJ said politely. He was always polite to your parents.

Your dad sat to the left, saying a hi behind the paper. He came alive in the afternoons. Your mom rubbed her swollen belly. JJ had never seen a pregnant woman before. At first, he was worried an alien was growing inside of her. When he told you that, you nearly died with laughter. It wasn’t the greatest feeling to be on the receiving end.

“What’re you kids plans for the day, then?” your mom asked as she took her seat.

“We might go fishing,” JJ said, lathering his pancakes. “There’s some good spots near the marsh.”

“Not the marsh,” you said. Still afraid of the gators, even after two years.

JJ rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, you gotta be careful of them gators,” he told you. He grinned as he lent over to steal a slice of bacon off your place. “They might bite!”

“Hey!” you complained, shoving him in the shoulder.

“Easy you two,” your mom chuckled. “What about John B? He coming with?”

“Maybe. We could go by his and ask,” JJ said to you. You nodded.

Your twosome became a threesome towards the end of the first summer. After playing pirates for the majority of your break, they had decided to invite John B to join. Your friendship with JJ was already set in stone (with him sleeping over almost every other night, though neither of you spoke about why), but considering you went to a different school to them both (a Catholic joint for girls only), your friendship with John B had mostly blossomed at the weekends or in the evenings after school like moonflower. Winter was filled playing games mostly inside, and spring in the grass largely. But now summer was back, school done with, and at the age of nine, there was little else more important than fishing, swimming and playing pretend in the wake.

The two of you polished off your breakfast and you finished getting dressed. Then, out you headed on your pushbikes. You stopped by John B’s, said hi to his dad, JJ stealing another slice of toast in the process, and then your trio went off to the jetty with the promise of being safe. John B had learnt how to drive his dad’s boat, so long as you stayed within a certain area, and JJ was becoming a natural fisher like his dad. You made yourself useful in anyway that you could. It seemed your blessing was swimming. You were strong in the water, could hold your breath the longest. You had taught JJ how to backflip off the jetty.

“I caught one!” JJ hollered. He tugged on the rod, struggling a moment. Reeling in a fish, he whooped loudly. It wasn’t exactly large but compared to the three nine-year-olds, anything was a marlin.

You did a little victory dance.

“Think we could have it for dinner?” John B wondered. His brown hair blew around in the summer breeze.

You pinched the still wiggling fish off the rod and dangled it in John B’s face. He cringed and scrambled away.

“Gross!”

You laughed like a mad man and then tossed it back in the water.

JJ whined. your name in complaint.

“What!? That thing wasn’t good enough to eat,” you said.

“I could’ve used it for bait,” JJ said.

“Oh,” you went meek. “Sorry.”

JJ kept his forlorn expression a moment longer as he got to his feet.

“You’re gonna be!”

With that, he pushed you in the water. You gave out a small squeal as you tumbled in. Before you hit the surface, you heard JJ’s mad laughter. An idea popped into your head. You broke to the surface, gasping for air and thrashing like you'd seen a guy do on TV.

“Help!” you gargled.

JJ panicked, leaning over and calling your name.

You kept your hands above you, splashing around. JJ tried to grab onto you. The moment you felt his hand in yours, a wicked grin came to your face, and you tugged him in too. When he came to the surface, you were cackling away, treading water comfortably as if going on a brisk jog.

“Hilarious,” he muttered, splashing at you. You splashed him back.

John B muttered something snidey about third-wheeling, and JJ and yourself shared a look. One nod then another, and the two pirates were hijacking the ship and pulling the third of their gang into the water too.

After swimming around for what felt like hours, the three of you clambered back into the small rowboat. Cheeks aching from laughter and chests heaving, you collapsed onto your backs. You grinned up at the sky. You wanted forever to feel this way. Lungs full, heart light, mind empty.

And hey - why couldn’t you?

~*~*~*~*~*

On his way back from school, JJ heard your laughter from your garden. He could recognise that sound anywhere. Walking over to your house, through to the back yard, he saw you sat on the porch steps. Your dad was sat with you, blowing bubbles in front of you both. The moment JJ came into sight, you were sitting up straighter, waving.

“I like your cap, smelly,” you said as he approached, nodding to his head.

JJ grinned and took it off. Placing it on your head, pushing down on the lip so it fell over your face, he said, “got it from my dad.”

“Nice,” you giggled, correcting it.

JJ smiled down at you. He was taller than you now, by a couple of inches.

It felt as though he had recently realised you were a girl. It sounded stupid, because JJ knew that you'd always been a girl, but when you were playing out it never seemed to matter. You were a good pirate nemesis and a decent fisher, and always up for a laugh. But in the latest school year, the girls had started whispering about the boys, nervously asking them to hold hands around the playground, playing kiss tag during lunch break. JJ and John B never got involved. They’d sit back and watch from a branch in a tree, talking about surfing. JJ was itching to try it out. His dad always raved about the waves.

You had nice hair though. Sun-stained skin and strawberry kissed lips. Your colourful eyes were squinting against the sun.

JJ stole back his cap and cleared his throat awkwardly, trying to distract his wandering thoughts.

“Wanna go get John B and head to the cove?” he wondered.

You turned and asked your dad. The answer was yes, so long as you were back before dark. With that, the two of you set off to John B’s place. JJ bumped your shoulder as you walked. You talked about school and your peers. Told stories about the fights that had broken out on the school yard. You complained about your school's mandatory summer dress's and the lack of good jello flavours in the canteen. JJ complained about only catching small fish and nothing big enough to fry.

When you went to retrieve John B, he complained that he was tired, and didn’t feel up to coming out. Walking to the pirates cove, JJ and you complained about John B not coming out to play when you hadn’t seen him in five days.

“He’s so lame,” you muttered, kicking a stone.

“What an asshole.”

“I don’t think he’s an asshole,” you said to JJ. “Sides, you shouldn’t say things like that.”

JJ shrugged. “My dad says it all the time.”

You eyed his side profile. “How are things, with your dad?”

JJ shoved his hands in his short pockets and shrugged again, watching his feet as you kept walking. “Fine.”

“He do anything lately? To you, I mean?”

He sniffed and looked the opposite way to you, at the houses. “What’s it matter?”

“Well…” You weren’t sure how to answer that. You sighed and conceded. “I guess it doesn’t.”

The rest of the walk to pirate cove was quiet. JJ felt badly and he wanted to apologise, though there wasn’t anything specific to apologise for. There was just a feeling itching at him that he’d upset you. As you came to the clearing which led to the cove, he stopped. You followed suit, watching him.

“Race?” he offered, giving you a small smile.

You grinned.

“Bring it.”

A countdown, feet poised and at the ready, and you were off. JJ stumbled over a tree root as he ran, making you laugh. You ran and ran until you got to the cove. There, panting, you had to accept defeat. JJ’s hand slapped the tree in victory.

“First!” he cheered.

You laughed.

“Best two out of three?” you wondered.

JJ eyed up where you stood, on the edge of the jump where the rope swing had been made. There was a small drop into the deeper part of the water. He grinned.

“Nah.”

Shoving you on the collarbones, you let out a screech as fell into the water. When you came to the surface, you were yelling all sorts of things at him. JJ knew you weren't really angry.

“Asshole!” you hollered.

JJ barked out a laugh.

“You said it!”

“Screw you!” you returned, making him laugh harder.

You swam to shore and unsheathed your sword. It was a little rusted from want of use, with school disrupting your battle. The older the two of you got, the more unnatural it was starting to feel to wield it. You raised it in threat of war. JJ raised a brow. Doing the same, he pulled out his own sword. Recently sharpened.

“You’re gonna regret that, Captain Maybank,” you said in a croaky voice.

“Argh,” JJ countered, advancing to you with his sword extended. “We’ll just have to see.”

The battle was bloody and brief. Though out of practise, you triumphed, with JJ dead on the dirt bank once more. Winning the fight, the map died with him, and thus the treasure. Upon realising this, you cried out a long, dramatic ‘noooo!’, dropping to your knees before falling flat on the dirt beside your defeated foe.

As you caught your breath, your smiles slowly fading, you watched the sky above. You'd fallen on the perfect spot where you could see it through the trees. Sun now lower, the days shorter thanks to fall, you sighed and folded your arms behind your head. JJ did the same.

“Hey. Can I ask you something?” JJ wondered.

“Yeah, course.”

“Have you had your first kiss yet?”

You kept watching the sky. A bird flew by, merely a dark spec.

“No,” you said. “I mean, I go to an all-girls school, remember? Not many guys to be kissing.”

“You could kiss a girl.”

“I don’t know,” you said. “Not sure if I wanna. Kiss a girl, that is.”

JJ nodded against the floor. He sighed and watched the leaves rustle in the breeze. A few fell.

“Have you had your first kiss?”

“No,” JJ admitted. Somewhat bashful and somewhat proud, he told you, “this girl Becky wanted to kiss me.”

“She did?”

“Mhm. But I didn’t feel like it.”

That was a lie. Ten year-old JJ was nervous as hell. Scared, even. He’d laughed it off with John B, was perhaps a little mean to Becky in the process, but she didn’t ask again. That was on Tuesday.

“What do you think it’s like?” you wondered. “I mean, they do it all the time in the movies.”

“Not sure,” JJ frowned. “Maybe wet?”

“Ew,” you laughed, snorting. You sat up and dusted the pine needles and dirt off your wet arms. They were already drying off. You looked down at him. His grey t-shirt was stained with dirt and dust. The red cap on his head sat funny, having been shifted since he laid down.

“We could always kiss,” you said.

JJ’s eyes darted to you.

“We could?”

“Why not?” you shrugged. You fiddled your fingers. “You and John B are the only boys I know.”

“Then why don’t you kiss John B?” JJ asked you, sitting up too.

You shrugged, looking to the water. “Just…don’t wanna.”

JJ considered your offer. He took you in as you watched the creek. Slightly imperfect features, sun-kissed cheeks, faintly rosy from running and playing. He’d rather kiss you than anybody else.

“Okay,” he said. You turned your head to face him.

“Okay.”

The two of you nervously giggled, then shifted around awkwardly. Somehow, you both ended up on your knees, facing one another. You had your hands clenched in little fists on your thighs. JJ had his buried in his short pockets. You stared at one another for a long minute, then slowly, nervously, leaned towards each other. You closed your eyes and JJ supposed he should do the same. That’s what they did in the films, after all. A gap, a falter, and then your lips clumsily met. It wasn’t a quick peck like JJ saw the other kids doing at school during kiss-tag. It also wasn’t long or passionate, like in the films. It just sort of…was. You pulled away first.

JJ opened his eyes just before you opened yours. His face was bright pink. You snorted before laughing altogether. JJ couldn’t help but copy. The two of you fell into hysterics.

“That was it?” you howled.

“What the hell is all the fuss about?” JJ agreed with a guffaw.

Your laughter echoed off the trees and rocks, and encased you in a joyous, jovial bubble.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

There were no more pirates, at pirates’ cove. Now, instead, you, JJ and John B would sit around on the dirt bank and listen to music. You passed stories back and forth about school, with the JJ’s become more and more filthy, making you and John B groan through your laughs. You often wished you went to the same school as JJ and John B. Jealousy tickled at your throat whenever you thought of the two of them hanging out without you throughout the day. You knew JJ didn’t love school. As you neared the age of thirteen, he joked about skipping class more often. You also had this weird feeling that he still preferred it to being at home. Just two nights ago he had slept at your house again. He had red markings around his neck, as if his dad had tried to choke him. As always, you didn’t ask and he didn’t explain. You just held his hand and let him sleep. Snuck him breakfast in the morning and helped him climb out your window. He didn’t need the rope as much anymore, having had a growth spurt over the summer. It remained your shared secret. It was the only one you had from John B now. Neither of you had said about keeping it on the downlow– you just mutually decide it was best to.

JJ’s aforementioned growth spurt hadn’t gone unnoticed by you. As the three of you passed stories about the boat race that happened a couple of days ago, in the first week of summer break, you found your eyes drifting to JJ. To the way his arms moved as he talked, the beginnings of muscles building since he started getting more obsessive with gym. Around his neck is a shark tooth necklace that you’d given him as a feel-better gift, a couple days after his mom left, a year ago now. It sits against his toned, sun-kissed chest. The black button-up shirt he was wearing hung lose on his frame.

“Hey! You wanna stop ogling JJ and answer the question?” John B asked, tossing a grape at you to get your attention.

You rolled your eyes at him and flipped him the bird. “In your dreams am I ogling JJ, John B.”

“Think they’re more like his dreams but whatever,” John B muttered. To that, JJ flipped him off too.

“What was your question, then?” you asked.

“Wanna go hang out at the docks? See if there’s some odd jobs that need doing? We might be able to earn a couple of bucks or something,” John B said.

You shrugged. That actually didn’t sound half bad. So, finishing your soda, you nodded and got to your feet. “Let’s do it.”

“I’m telling you,” JJ began as he stood up, too. “This guy Heyward gave me a twenty just for helping wash down his boat the other day.”

“You’re full of shit,” you told him, rolling your eyes.

“I swear to God! A whole twenty!” JJ argued back loudly. His voice cracked in the process, making you and John B share a snigger. “Fuck off.”

“Oh, someone’s got their panties in a twist,” you whistled with a grin.

“You think I wear panties?” JJ asked you, raising a brow. The three of you had started walking by then, out of the marsh.

“I know it,” you quipped back.

JJ grinned boyishly and sprinted ahead, back facing you, before promptly mooning you and John B. You both groaned, shaking your heads at him as he broke into hysterics.

“You’re so gross, JJ,” you muttered, pretending to gag.

“Lucy don’t think so,” he cockily replied, falling back into step with the two of you.

“Lucy? That the flavour of the week, huh?” you teased.

JJ rolled his eyes, smirking. “She’s cute. She’s got this wonderful, enormous—”

He gestured graphically to his chest.

“-Personality.”

“You need help, JJ,” John B said in response, making you laugh.

It seemed the moment JJ had become an official teenager, he started thinking more with his dick than his head. Girls weren’t blind to him. He was a good-looking kid; funny and outgoing and rebellious. One of the girls in your friendship group at school had a crush on him, too. Had started asking you all about him: his favourite food and favourite music. Shamelessly, she wore a band tee-shirt of The Kooks (which hung so big on her, you suspected it was from her dad’s wardrobe) the next day when the two of you went to the boneyard to hang out. The older kids didn’t much like you guys there, but when there was enough of you, they seemed to tolerate it. You had stuffed down the joy you had gotten when seeing how JJ barely even glanced at her.

The docks were rather quiet that day. Miss Amy nodded hello to the three of you as you walked down the jetty. JJ made a crude joke about her to John B, earning a shove in the shoulder as the former boy laughed. You petted one of the fishermen’s dogs as you passed another boat. Then, you were walking up near Heyward’s. There was a boy sat outside, reading a book.

“Yo. Heyward in?” JJ asked him.

The boy looked up. Dark skin and dark hair, eyes wide as if surprised someone was talking to him. “He had to head out for a bit.”

“Damnit,” JJ sighed, looking to you and John B.

“Why? What’d you need?” the guy asked.

“We’re just looking to see if we can make a couple bucks,” JJ told him.

John B clarifies what he meant by adding, “we helped him out with some groceries the other day.”

“Oh,” the guy nodded. “You guys from around here, too?”

“Sorta,” you replied. “We go to Kildare High.”

“Me too,” he smiled. You smiled back. He seemed like a nice guy. A little awkward and tense, but friendly, nonetheless. “I’m Pope.”

You introduced yourself, shaking his outstretched hand. John B did the same and JJ nodded at him, dropping his name last.

“There’s no groceries to run but the boat needs a clean,” Pope told you all, rising to his feet. “I was just gonna finish this chapter before doing it.”

“We’re down to help if you like,” John B said.

“How much for, like?”

“JJ!” You scolded.

He held his hands up. “What? Just asking! Not gonna do slave labour!”

“Ignore him,” you said to Pope. You looked to the jetty. “Which one’s yours?”

“This one,” Pope said, pointing. It’s painted white; a little well-loved but still in good nick. He put his book down after dog-earing the page. You couldn’t help but take a scan of the cover. The World Of Autopsies.

Following his lead, you grabbed at buckets and sponges. Pope unravelled the hose pipe and pulled it with him as you headed towards the boat. JJ messed with his cap, chatting to John B about fishing, and you fell in foot with Pope.

“What’s that book you’re reading?”

“It’s about autopsies,” Pope replied, sounding somewhat embarrassed as he looked at his feet.

“What? They didn’t have any copies of Jekyll and Hyde left?” you joked.

He smiled at that. “I wanna be a coroner, when I graduate high school.”

“Damn, you’re thinking about after high school? I don’t even think past after this year,” you chuckled.

“I don’t even think past after today!” JJ added loudly.

“You don’t have any reason to!” you called back snidely. He stuck his tongue out at you.

The three of you climbed aboard and got to cleaning. The conversation came naturally; cracking jokes and telling stories, getting to know Pope. Already, he was starting to feel like he was slotting quite comfortably into your strange little gang of pirates. JJ took the piss out of him rather a lot, but you knew that he liked him; could tell by the way he kept asking him questions and offering him help.

As you hosed down the deck, JJ scrubbed away at a stain on the flagpole. A wasp flew at you. Made you screech and dodge out of the way, sending the water stream messy. It hit JJ and drenched him in a second. He shouted out your name in a curse.

“Sorry!”

JJ rolled his eyes, finding his smile, and grabbed at the bucket of soapy water. You already knew what he was thinking. Laughing, you went to start running, but he was so fast (legs now so much longer than yours) and caught up easily, tipping the water on you. Screaming from the cold, you directed the hose pipe on him, aiming for his face. The two of you laughed, starting to wrestle as he battled for the hose, and you feel like pirates again, just as you were when you were seven.

Finally, easing up, the two of you broke apart. Your chest ached from laughing. JJ wiped his face and took off his soaked cap to brush back his hair. Then, his eyes fell on you.

Laughing, pointing at you, he said, “you’re looking way to hot right now.”

You looked down to see that the t-shirt you were wearing was now see-through from the wet, sticking to your bralette. Rolling your eyes mirthfully, trying to fight off the heat that was rushing to your cheeks, you messed with your top so it was no longer pasted to your skin.

“If you two are done flirting, I’ve got some drinks for you kids for your hard work,” a deep voice called.

You and JJ spun around to come face to face with Heyward. He was holding up a tray of plastic cups. The warmth in your face only got worse. JJ mumbled something along the lines of ‘we’re not flirting’ under his breath as the two of you dumb your stuff. Stepping off the boat, hose pipe now switched off, you, JJ, John B and Pope all enjoyed a drink, an unspoken, newly formed foursome.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

At sixteen came the year of experimenting. Alcohol and weed and cigarettes. A few classmates were now in relationships. First kisses were a thing of the past and instead gossip consisted of sex. Who did what? How far did they go? Conversations like that were made for JJ. Sat around at John B’s house, you sat next to the latest member of the group (Kiara), he’d divulge in dirty stories of debauchery which none of you asked for, but all would listen to, semi-curious. Especially the boys. John B was already leaning towards being a hopeless romantic. He’d revealed to you, one night, his crush on a certain Kook girl. You tried your best not to laugh him out of your room. There’s was no chance in hell anything like that could ever work out. Pope was less awkward with you guys now, but still useless with girls. Flirting was like a foreign tongue to him. Kiara didn’t seem all that interested in dating. You and she had never talked about crushes or guys.

“I swear man, this girl was going down on me like she was thirsty,” JJ grinned, smug and sure of himself.

You gagged into your drink, making Kie laugh.

“You’re so full of shit,” Pope told him.

“Dude, I’m telling you. Getting your dick sucked is like the best feeling in the world,” JJ gloated.

“Can we please talk about something else?” Kiara asked, rolling her eyes.

John B seemed happy to indulge. “So, my dad’s got a new trial he thinks with this gold—”

“Not about the gold!” the four of you chorused at him. John B shrunk back into his seat around the fire, taking a swig of his beer, wincing at the taste. None of you really liked it all that much, yet.

“Well, my parents are still leaning towards sending me to Kook Academy,” Kie said.

You frowned. “Really?”

“Mhm. I’ve managed to convince them to let me stay another year, but I think when I turn seventeen, it’s gonna happen.”

“Damn,” you said.

“Well, we’ll still, like, come hang out with you,” JJ told her.

“Gee, thanks, JJ,” Kiara sarcastically quipped at his luke-warm sentiment.

“Yeah. I’m sure your life is going to be lacking without JJ’s sex-stories,” you joked.

“Jealousy is a disease, babe. Get better,” he said to you, semi-bitter.

The conversation fell into talks about school and summer. Daydreaming for the endless days, when the sun rises at four and sets at midnight. Life feels infinite then, full of endless possibilities. Possibilities that you dote in, like how maybe JJ might snap out of dating this endless string of girls and look at you for once as more than a friend. You knew it was a pipe dream. After being his friend for so long, it seemed pathetic to think he might be able to picture you outside of that box. No matter. He was still your best friend.

“I gotta get going home,” Pope eventually said.

“Me too,” Kie agreed, getting up.

“You guys staying?” John B asked you and JJ.

You shook your head. “Sorry, Stinky. My parents asked for me back for midnight, so I’m already past curfew.”

John B smiled at the nickname. JJ was Smelly so it only seemed right for John B to be Stinky. Downing the last of your beer, you groaned and got to your feet. JJ stood up too.

“I better head as well before my old man gets ticked off,” JJ sighed.

The two of you share a look. You know it was bullshit; he was crashing at your place tonight, just like he did almost every night. The last fight him and his dad got in got bloody. JJ was strong enough to fight back now. He didn’t cry like he did when he was a kid. Just got angry. More times when he’d show up to your house after a row, he’d be seething, cussing his dad out and tugging at his hair. It scared you to see him collapse under the pressure like that. It seemed more and more like there was this tension lying under him. Part of it must’ve been inherited from his dad – his short-fused temper – but it seemed the happy-household he lived in only coaxed it out of him further.

“Ciao ciao,” JJ called as the two of you walked away from the chateau.

“Later Pogues,” John B hollered back.

“Pogues?” you mumbled, looking to JJ.

“Like Pogies? Scum-fish?”

“Ah,” you said, nodding.

“I like the sound of it,” JJ said.

You hummed your agreement. He fixed his cap. This one was green. He got it cheap from a thrift shop.

“Hey, smelly?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I ask you something?” you wondered.

“I feel like you’re going to anyway,” he chuckled.

“Is sex…Like, is it actually that good?” you asked. You want to look at him when you do, but you can’t seem to be able to hold his gaze. Found it easier to casually look at the ground ahead.

JJ shrugged; hands shoved in his short pockets. “Depends. Sometimes it’s better than other times.”

You nodded.

“Why?”

“Just wondering,” you mumbled.

The two of you don’t talk more about it. You walked back to your house in near silence, but it wasn’t uncomfortable or tense. Routine as always, you headed up the front door and quietly call out to your parents who are sat in the living room, watching television. You snuck past your younger brother’s door to his bedroom before walking into your own. Opening the window, you started taking off your jewellery at your dresser whilst he clambered through the window. He grabbed his toothbrush from your make-up brush pot, checked the cost of the corridor before darting into the bathroom. By the time he’s done, you were in your pyjamas and sat on the bed, scrolling through Instagram.

JJ borrowed your comb to start taming his hair. He’s stood in front of your mirror, in a pair of gym-style shorts that hang low on his waist. You do your best not to look at him, stood half-naked, abs on proud display. It feels wrong for you too.

“You haven’t had sex yet, right?”

You have to look up from your phone with that.

“What?”

“You haven’t slept with anyone yet, have you?” he repeated.

“Well…No, I guess not,” you mumbled.

JJ looked to you. “Why not?”

You laughed, trying your best to keep your voice down. “Nobody’s really into me like that.”

“Bullshit,” JJ immediately said.

“What?”

“Bull-shit! I know Matty P was asking you to the kegger just last week. That guy’s so horny for you – it’s obvious,” JJ replied.

You rolled your eyes and looked back down at your phone. “He’s also a sad loser who thinks owning a designer watch is an entire personality trait.”

JJ sniggered. “True.”

“I mean, everyone knows it’s fake,” you chuckled. It seemed to work, your distraction from the topic. You didn't think there would be anyway for you to subtly explain how you hadn't entertained the idea of someone else, in the hopes that one day, JJ might want you back.

You move to crawl under the bedsheets as JJ finished up on his hair. He took his spot and you yours, like always, and you flick off your lamp. There’s nothing but a single string of fairy lights keeping your room lit up. They hang above your bedroom door, batteries half-dead, only half-lit. Sighing, you turned off your phone and dumped it in on the bedside table. JJ got comfy, shifting around under the sheets. He smelt of cologne and smoke from the bonfire.

As he laid on his back, you laid on your side, facing the wall. You felt wide awake.

“You remember when we kissed?”

Wide wide awake.

“You mean back at Pirates’ Cove?”

“Yeah,” JJ said lowly into the darkness of the room.

“I mean, yeah. I remember it,” you replied. Silence. “Why?”

“Just thinking about it,” JJ mumbled. Frowning, you wondered what he could mean.

“In what way?”

“I don’t know,” he sighed. You hear the rustle of the duvet as he turned onto his side. You weren’t sure if he was facing you or the other wall. “Just how that was the first time I sort of realised you were a girl.”

You couldn’t help but laugh. You moved the blanket to muffle the noise. Rolling over, you come to find he was facing you. There was barely enough space for Jesus to fit between you both. Maybe his arm, might?

“Flattering, smelly,” you mumbled. Both of you sported lazy smiles.

“You look so different now,” JJ told you.

“I should hope so. That was six years ago,” you replied.

“Shit. Was it that long ago?” he checked. You nodded. “So, we’ve been friends for…”

“Nine years,” you finished.

“Nine years,” JJ echoed.

There was a strange sadness to his voice, like time passed too quickly. He was so much older now. Youth still there but mellowed, from his dad and his mom and his life. One would think adult things like sex and drinking would make him more mature, but it just screamed out him being young. Wanting to experience everything the world can offer, as if he might drop dead tomorrow.

“You know the first time you slept here,” you began, “you were crying. It was after your dad hit you.”

“He’d been laying into my ma,” JJ said, filling in the blanks. “I tried to get him off her and he just went for me instead.”

“I told you something.”

“I know,” JJ smiled. “You told me my house was haunted.”

“I really thought it was,” you chuckled soberly. “And I really thought if we just moved to pirates’ cove, everything would be fixed.”

“I know,” JJ said. “I believed you. I…I remember thinking that it was one of the nicest things you’d ever said to me, when you did.”

“Really?”

“Mhm. I think…”

He cut himself with a sigh, eyes drifting down, away from your gaze. For some reason, it makes your heartbeat viscerally harder.

“You think?” you encouraged, staring at him.

“I think that was the moment I realised I liked you.”

“Well, obviously. We’re friends, JayJ. I knew—”

“No,” he said, cutting you off, firm. His eyes are boring into yours, as if he can see into your thoughts. Your short-lived smile faded. “I mean that I realised I liked liked you. That I had a crush on you.”

You licked your lips nervously. “When we were kids?”

JJ’s fingers brushed against your own, under the blankets. He tangled his into yours, intertwining your hands, just like you had done when you were kids. You couldn’t tell who moved first, but the two of you start to kiss. You sighed against his lips, bringing up a hand to stroke at his jaw, feeling half-detached from your body. Is this real? Is this actually happening? The moment JJ’s teeth gently nipped at your lower lip was your answer. Yes.

All the other girls and all the other bullshit faded away. It didn’t matter to you, in that moment. JJ was tethered to you from the start, since you were kids. Everybody could see it coming – maybe even you – that the two of you would tumble through life together. It just needed time to grow, like nurturing a rare but beautiful flower. Yes, you thought, as the kiss deepens and the hands explored; good things take time.

#jj #jj maybank #jj x reader #jj maybank x reader #jj x oc #jj maybank x oc #jj x original character #jj maybank x original character #outer banks #outerbanks #outer banks fic #outerbanks fic #obx #obx fic #taylor swift #seven #original character #jj x mitzi #jj maybank x mitzi

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doomed-era · 2 years

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Deities/Deity-like Figures of Zelda

I've noticed a common trend in the Zelda community where most deities aside from the ones mentioned in Skyward Sword are rarely brought up or discussed, and I think that's really a shame. Hyrule is implied to be very polytheistic and has a multitude of less frequently mentioned gods and godlike beings. Here's a list of all the gods I'm aware of in alphabetical order, as well as a short description. Some of this will be based on my own headcanons and opinions, but if there's anything you want to add on or that I missed please let me know!

As an additional warning—This contains major spoilers for Majora's Mask, Skyward Sword, Link's Awakening, Phantom Hourglass, and Twilight Princess. Proceed with caution!

Cyclos

A wind god who creates cyclones, featured in The Wind Waker. According to The King of Red Lions, he bears some ill will towards humans, and will mock Link if he is trapped in one of his cyclones. After defeating him, Link receives the Ballad of Gales, which allows him to control cyclones. Cyclos's brother is Zephos, another wind god.

Demise

The ruler of demons, featured primarily in Skyward Sword. He tried to attain the Triforce, but was imprisoned by Hylia under a magical seal. He is permanently destroyed in Skyward Sword's present day, but his servant Ghirahim travels into the past and revives him using Hylia's spirit. He is defeated, and his consciousness is sealed into the Master Sword.

Din

The Golden Goddess of Power, primarily featured in Ocarina of Time. She appears in Oracle of Seasons as an oracle, and in Minish Cap as an NPC. She is mentioned or referenced in The Wind Waker, Twilight Princess, and Skyward Sword. Dinraal the dragon from Breath of the Wild is likely a reference to her, as well as a crest featured in Memory #1, but she is not directly referred to or featured in Breath of the Wild. Din along with the other Golden Goddesses created the world (or Hyrule, as is stated in Ocarina of Time, however we are assuming that Hyrule is referring to the entire world despite canonical countries outside of Hyrule), and left the Triforce behind.

Earth God

Mentioned in a learnable song in The Wind Waker, the Earth God's Lyric.

Farore

The Golden Goddess of Courage, featured primarily in Ocarina of Time. She appears in Oracle of Seasons and Oracle of Ages as an oracle, and in The Minish Cap as an NPC. She is mentioned or referenced in The Wind Waker, Twilight Princess, and Skyward Sword, and the dragon Farosh in Breath of the Wild is likely a reference to her. Her symbol is on a Triforce crest in Breath of the Wild Memory #1. She, along with the other Golden Goddesses, created the world and left the Triforce behind.

Fierce Deity

A god featured in Majora's Mask. He is a powerful deity that assumedly was turned into a mask. Link can wear this mask to transform into the Fierce Deity.

Four Giants

Guardian Deities of Termina. Link's journey in Majora's Mask is to find and summon the Four Giants to prevent the moon from falling.

Frog Deities

Guardian deities of the Sheikah, featured in Breath of the Wild. The Sheikah and the Yiga will bring offerings to these deities and they are frequent around Sheikah and Yiga occupied areas.

Goddess of Time

Featured in Majora's Mask. As the moon falls down on Clock Town, Tatl cries out for the Goddess of Time to save them. This prayer may have been answered, as Link relearns the Song of Time to travel three days into the past.

Goddess of Sand

Featured in Ocarina of Time. The Desert Colossus is mentioned by Sheik to be a "goddess of sand."

Hylia

Featured in Skyward Sword and Breath of the Wild. Appointed to guard the Triforce, Hylia orchestrated the events of Skyward Sword as an attempt to stop Demise. While trying to save the surface world, she sent hylians to Skyloft while staying and fighting alongside the other races in an attempt to defeat Demise. She was then killed, and reincarnated years later in the form of a mortal girl, Zelda from Skyward Sword. In Breath of the Wild, she is a deity worshipped in most settlements. It is believed that women of the royal bloodline can pray to Hylia to unlock a sealing power. The Sheikah seem to revere her highly.

Light Spirits

Featured in Twilight Princess. The light spirits Ordona, Faron, Eldin, and Lanayru guard Hyrule "at the behest of the gods," and seem to reside at springs in their respective provinces. They prevented the Interlopers, the ancestors of the Twili, from using the Triforce and sealed them into the Twilight Realm. In the final encounter with Ganondorf, Princess Zelda calls (or even prays) for aid, and they provide her with Light Arrows.

Lord Jabu-Jabu/Jabun

A fish deity worshipped by the Zora in Ocarina of Time and Oracle of Ages. He eats the Princess of the Zora, Ruto, and is infected by a parasite that is defeated by Link. Jabun, who is likely related to him (or could possibly be him) is featured in The Wind Waker.

Malanya

A god of horses featured in Breath of the Wild. He functions similarly to a Great Fairy, living inside a large flower and needing to be revived. He is able to bring horses back to life, and will scold Link for letting them die.

Nayru

The Golden Goddess of Wisdom, featured primarily in Ocarina of Time. She is alluded to or mentioned in The Wind Waker, Twilight Princess, and Skyward Sword, she is an oracle in Oracle of Ages, and an NPC in the Minish Cap. The dragon Naydra is likely a reference to her, and her symbol is on a Triforce crest in Breath of the Wild Memory #1. She, along with the other Golden Goddesses, created the world and left the Triforce behind.

Oshus

Also known as the Ocean King, Oshus is featured in Phantom Hourglass. He is the guardian of a portion of the sea, and creates an realm that Link travels into.

The Seven Heroines/Eighth Heroine

Guardians revered and worshiped by the Gerudo at some point, first mentioned in Breath of the Wild. They all represent a different virtue: skill, spirit, flight, gentleness, motion, endurance, and knowledge. The Eighth Heroine is rumored to be worshipped by the inhabitants of the Gerudo Highlands.

Valoo

Guardian deity of the Rito in The Wind Waker. In order to grow wings, young Rito must climb to the top of Dragon Roost Island to obtain a scale from Valoo.

The Wind Fish

The creator of an illusory realm called Koholint Island featured in Link's Awakening.

Wind Waker Prologue Deities

Gods called upon by the people that flooded Hyrule with a magical sea. They are implied to be connected to the Triforce, however this is never confirmed.

Zephos

Wind god, and the brother of Cyclos in The Wind Waker. Zephos seems to reside around a small shrine near Dragon Roost Island, and the Wind's Requiem song located on his shrine will let Link learn to control the wind direction.

#majora's mask #wind waker #ocarina of time #oracle of ages #oracle of seasons #skyward sword #twilight princess #phantom hourglass #link's awakening #breath of the wild #legend of zelda #loz #longpost

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foxynez · 1 year

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Hi there, love your writings and especially the smut - they're so descriptive and hot!!!😏😏😁😁 Wonder if you could write Quaritch with kinks about rope, wooden paddle and belt. I don't have a plot in mind, you're free to explore all you want 🙄🙄🙄🙄 I'd understand if you don't want to write it since these elements can be triggering to some people. Anyhow, love your work!!!

Oh my gosh, thank you so much! 🤗 Hehe, don't worry. These are my favorite elements and those who find it triggering shouldn't read it. I'll hope you enjoy it and I hope you don't mind I wrote this with human Quaritch 🙈

PUNISHMENT - Human!Miles Quaritch x Female Reader

Warnings: Nsfw, Smut, BDSM elements, Use of belt, Bondage, Spanking (just imaging those muscles flexing when he's gripping that paddle 🥵), Oral Sex, Unprotected Sex, Rough Sex.

"What was the one thing I ordered you not to do?" Miles asked sternly while binding your naked body with ropes.

"To not walk away from the group, Sir," you replied in a low whisper as you looked up at his stern face.

"Exactly. And what did you do?" He wasn't showing any emotions as he secured you in the frog tie position with your wrists and thighs bound together and your arms bound behind your back. He placed you on your back, leaving you immobile with your ass high up in the air and your pussy open on display for him. He looked up at your face, waiting for an answer.

You gulped. "I walked away from the group, Sir."

"And what happened?"

"A Thanator attacked me."

"That's right. You're lucky I was close by so I could kill it before you got hurt. Just see what one of them did to me. You're not a soldier, y/n. You're a scientist. And you need me to take care of you, to keep you safe," Miles spoke softly but firmly as he took his belt off and looped it around your neck.

"Yes, Sir," you replied and licked your lips as you looked up at him with big, lust-filled eyes. His intense, blue eyes held your gaze as he fastened the belt tightly around your throat.

"Then, you understand that I have to punish you for disobeying me."

"Yes, Sir," you said, biting your bottom lip as a wave of arousal flooded your pussy when Miles picked out the wooden paddle amongst his equipment.

"You will get ten swats, and I want you to count them all."

"Yes, Sir," you said anew and yelped when the first sting hit your bare ass without warning. Fuck, he was really angry with you.

"O-One," you mewled out and gasped when Miles grabbed the end of the belt and yanked it to the side, tightening the choke hold on your throat. Miles raised his massive, muscular arm and placed another mind-blowing spank on your ass.

"T-Two!" you cried out, feeling your skin already getting sore and red from the impact of the paddle. Miles' face revealed nothing as he continued spanking you, each swat jerking your body and sending a jolt of arousal through your core. Tears started prickling in your eyes, but you held them back. You wanted to make him proud, show him how strong you could be. You kept looking up into his eyes, your teeth sinking into your trembling lips as you whimpered out each number.

Miles watched aroused as each swat of the paddle created a new pattern of pretty redness on your skin while listening to the sound of your sweet voice counting each spank. His cock twitched with each cracking sound of the paddle hitting your skin. He looked up at your face and, saw the tears swimming in your eyes, saw how much you struggled to hold them back. But he also knew you didn't only feel the pain. He knew exactly what this did to your body, the mix of pain and arousal flooding your flesh each time the paddle hit your skin.

As you counted the last swat, you exhaled a breathy gasp of relief while your chest was heaving with exhaustion.

"You did so good, baby girl. So good," Miles praised while gently caressing your sore skin, smirking when he saw your pussy clenching in response. "Well, well... look at your pretty pussy lips, all puffy and greedy for my attention."

Without warning, Miles bent down and flicked his tongue across your slit. You gasped in pleasant surprise, moaned when Miles started working his jaw at a feral pace, growling like an animal as he lapped up your sweet juices with his eager tongue. He plunged it inside you, thrusting it in and out of your wet hole at a rapid pace. His tongue moved up to flick your clit, and that was it. Hips jerking and pussy clenching, you came with a guttural moan in your throat.

Miles had never tasted anything as deliciously sweet as you. He wanted more and more, couldn't get enough of your arousal flooding his mouth when your climax swept through your body. He licked and sucked your pussy lips into his mouth, growled when you responded so lovely to his touch, drenching his mouth and face with your sticky juices. His dick was painfully hard, and he reached down, shuddering as he zipped down his pants and wrapped his hand around his throbbing member.

Fuck…

He wanted to be inside you so badly, feel your warm essence coat his cock. Miles licked you through another one of your orgasms, lapping softly until your body relaxed and your chest heaved heavily with exhaustion.

"Fuck, y/n...you drive me crazy, you know that?" Miles grunted and crawled on top of you. He grabbed your thighs and slammed inside you in one hard thrust.

"Fuck!" both of you moaned in unison as Miles' cock filled you up and hit the deepest parts of your core. Eyes widening, you stared up at him as he stretched out your inner walls. Fuck, you would never get used to how big he was.

"Damn, you feel so good, sweetheart," Miles mumbled and started thrusting, clenching his teeth when your wet pussy tightened around him. "So fucking tight and wet."

"Oh, Miles…," you hummed in a breathy exhale. "You feel so good inside me, Sir."

Miles looked down at you through half-lidded eyes, loved the cute, little mewls he was coaxing from your parted lips as he fucked you hard and deep. Miles straightened his body, grabbed the end of the belt around your neck, and pulled on it as he started pounding into you hard and fast.

Pulses of pleasure shot through your core each time he pulled on the belt around your throat. Your mind went blank, your head swimming in a cloud of pleasure as you looked up at the Colonel fucking you. The image of him saving you earlier flashed before you. The look he had in his eyes told you everything you needed to know. He had looked angry, but most of all, he had looked scared.

Your body rocked in pace with his thrusts, his cock pumping in and out of you, building up a tightening knot of pleasure in your lower belly.

"I’m gonna…I’m coming!" you moaned just as pleasure erupted, and your pussy clenched around Miles' cock.

"Fuck!" Miles growled, his cock twitching as your pussy clamped down on him. With a final thrust, his body jerked, and he swelled deep inside you, emptying his cum inside your fluttering core.

Miles pulled out of you, his chest heaving rapidly as he untied you from the ropes and belt, and cradled you across his lap.

"Are you alright?" Miles asked, kissing your forehead.

"Mmhmm," you smiled softly and sighed with content as you nuzzled into his hard chest, feeling safe, loved, and protected as he embraced you with his strong arms.

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spookymultimedia · 4 months

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Do you have any headcanons 4 cartman's pets? :3

Oh I absolutely do!! :D (very very long)

(CW mentions of pet death/loss)

Cartman got Mr.Kitty as a pet when he saw her outside at 4 years old. He chased the cat and physically dragged her inside, which prompted her to freak out in the house. Then Cartman fed her cake and begged pretty please with a cherry on top to keep the kitty. Liane has no choice in the matter really so of course they kept the cat. They didn't give her shots or neuter her, they just gave her a bath and fed her cat food and called it a day.

Cartman got Fluffy from the County Fair from winning a pie eating contest. Liane was shocked to see Cartman with yet another animal he wanted to keep. And she can't say no, so Fluffy came home with them. Funny enough she was actually easier to take care of than the cat. They usually fed her scraps. She had a pretty good diet of food that Cartman was supposed to eat but he gave it to her and pretended to eat his veggies so he could have dessert please. He taught Fluffy a couple of tricks like spinning and sitting on command. He even claimed he was gonna take her to the fair just like Wilbur in that Charlottes Web movie. Fun fact for years Cartman was convinced Wilbur was a girl and hated when people corrected him because he's used to thinking about the character a certain way and didn't feel like changing how he watched it.

He loved fluffy to bits but she died due to hereditary health problems. Instead of telling Cartman the piggy was dead she just fell in love with a daddy pig and ran away with him to have sex and babies. Cartman resents Fluffy for being such a whore and leaving him behind. He still cried in bed about it for a couple nights though.

Once Cartman tried to keep a pet frog. On wet mornings when frogs huddled around all the puddles, he and the other 3 tried to catch frogs. All of the frogs they caught always went missing every time they tried, so eventually they just gave up and moved onto something else.

Once Gerald snatched up Mr.Kitty and took her away by force while Cartman was screaming and crying at him to let her go. Later he claimed she wasn't vaccinated so she was dangerous to be around Cartman, but he was also using her for cheesing. Later Kyle helped Cartman steal his cat back and Liane promised they would give the cats shots and gave her neutered. After that Gerald left their cat alone.

When they got Mr.Kitty neutered they discovered that she's is actually intersex. Cartman was extremely extremely happy to have a pet who's just like him. Well not exactly like him but still.

For years he depended on Mr.Kitty to get him through his audio hallucinations and grounding himself. If she didn't wake up then no one is at the door trying to harm him and it's just his head being weird. Petting her is very therapeutic for him and calms him down when he's experiencing big scary emotions. He also liked letting her in his bed so she can be there if he gets a nightmare.

During middle school his cat went missing and he was extremely upset about it. He kept accusing that his girlfriend Heidi is responsible for the cat going missing. The longer she was missing the more he accused Heidi of lying to him, hurting his cat because she resents him and she's an awful person. For two whole weeks Butters helped Cartman search for his cat. His friends also helped but Butters helped the most. One night while he was driving home without Mr.Kitty yet again and realized he's never going to see his cat ever again. He broke into tears while Butters and Stan comforted him. Later Heidi finds him grieving his cat and she tells him he forgives him for getting upset at her and understands he was just stressed and didn't mean it. Cartman didn't apologize at all and let her hug and console him.

After that Cartman didn't own a pet for several several years. When he was in his late 40s and the most depressed he had ever been in his life, his therapist suggested owning a cat to give him a routine to have and help him cope with loneliness. So he adopted a cat and it worked. After awhile he ended up with 9 cats in his house, but then he got his shit together and gave away the ones that had bad relationships with the other cats or didn't enjoy being in his house. Then he was left with four cats. Which was a pretty big improvement but still makes normal people gawk at him. And he kept those cats for a long long time. I haven't thought much about the other three, but I know one of the cats is a three legged cat named Zipper. He was born like that. He's the fastest of the four cats and the most friendly one.

After Cartman passed away from cancer in his early 60s Kyle and Stan the two cats Cartman still had. The cats where very comforting for Kyle since he had a harder time coping with his the loss.

And not a pet headcannon technically but Kyle had a habit of putting cat food and cat nip near Cartman's gave to "keep him company." People give Kyle weird looks when he brings cat food to a graveyard but it makes him happy so he doesn't care.

#south park #south park headcanons #eric cartman #liane cartman #kyle broflovski #heidi turner #butters stotch #stan marsh #styleman #kyman

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sadcatinapartyhat · 13 days

Text

In which Mary forgets.

The first thing she forgot was the colour of a meadow on a midsummer day.

The second was the sound of a door sliding open, and a voice that still hadn’t lost the shake of anger.

“Excuse us,” said the voice. “But do you mind if we sit here?”

Mary didn’t mind.

“You see,” the voice explained. “We had seats already. Perfectly nice seats, in fact—but then we were disturbed. Did you know this place accepts mentally deficient toe-rags?”

Mary had not.

“Me either,” said the voice. It was a bit steadier now. “Well, you seem nice, at any rate—what’s your name?”

The voice had a name, too. But Mary couldn’t forget what it was.

…

The next thing she forgot was her own hands, glowing with the light of a thousand suns. She forgot the letter that came on her birthday and the man who came with it, tall and silver and kind when he told her she was magic. She forgot the feeling of a wand in her hand, the control, the certainty it gave her, something inside her slotting into place without ever having realised it was missing at all.

Ah, yes, she forgot thinking, when the man took out his own and conjured her mother a rose. Now everything is finally right.

She forgot how it felt when she heard that Word for the very first time and she realised she’d been so very wrong.

…

Mary forgot that the voice belonged to a girl. A girl with long, soft, pressed-copper hair, hair that smelled like vanilla and apples and sunshine.

She forgot how she sounded when she laughed.

“Sunshine isn’t a smell, Mary—but thank you all the same.”

Mary disagreed. Sunshine was her favourite smell.

She forgot how the girl looked with her sleeves rolled up and her wand in her plait, hands stained red-yellow-green by berries and powders and potions, eyes blazing in triumph when the man with the walrus moustache told her she was clever. Mary wondered how he did it—how he made her light up like that, and how she could do it, too.

She forgot late nights in the dorm and afternoons in the library, painting nails and proofreading essays. The girl would look at her Potions and Mary would look at her Charms, and they’d roll their eyes when boys with silly names and big mouths sent them cards and curses and called them pretty.

“You’re all I need, Mary. Romance is reductive, and they’re all arrogant prats with frogs for brains.”

Mary wished it was true.

But then she forgot glasses and messy hair, and battles won with wands and broomsticks and words, and watching her watching him when she thought no one was looking. She forgot being sixteen and feeling something change around her. She forgot feeling like she should change, too. She forgot crying when she couldn’t.

…

She forgot the star.

She forgot his black curls and his silver eyes, and his face, pretty like a girl’s. She forgot holding his hand and pretending it was hers. She forgot how he made her listen to Bowie and she made him listen to ABBA, and how they laughed and cried and fought and made up and never, ever kissed.

She forgot sitting by the fire in a crowded common room, not reading, not talking. He looked at him and she looked at her and neither of them looked at each other.

And she forgot that the reason they’d always worked so well was that really, they’d never worked at all.

…

She forgot the castle in winter, the way the ice hung off the stone like a diamond necklace, the way the white made the blue swallow you whole.

“Here we are, Mary!” said the girl. “Our very last Sluggy Christmas! What are you wearing? Did you decide yet?”

Mary hadn’t, but she was leaning towards the pink with the lace.

“Oh, good,” said the girl. “That one’s my favourite.”

Mary’s favourite was the emerald silk.

“Yes,” said the girl. “I was thinking that, too—it matches my eyes, doesn’t it?”

Mary wondered if the girl was sad. She’d just broken up with the latest boy, and it was the first time she’d be going alone. Mary didn’t have a partner, either. She wondered if she might like to go together.

Just so they wouldn’t be lonely.

Just as friends.

Just once.

“Oh—er, sorry, Mary,” said the girl. “But I’m not going alone.”

Mary didn’t want to ask. But she did.

“Potter,” said the girl. “James Potter.”

…

She forgot the words to Lady Stardust. Cherry Bomb. Jolene, Lola, and Nina, Pretty Ballerina. She forgot the Blitzkrieg Bop and the Crocodile Rock, and she forgot dancing in the tower and the flat and the cottage, arms around a boy or a girl or a stranger or the air above her head, dancing just to move, dancing to remember. Dancing to forget.

…

The forgetting came quicker after that.

She forgot the war. She forgot the secrets and the lies they told themselves to get through the day, the lies that tore them apart from the inside out and the ones that put them back together. She forgot killing and torture and running and waking from nightmares to find herself in hell.

She forgot the dead. She forgot the traitors and the cowards and the black, festering hole in her chest where her heart used to be.

She forgot the girl with Healing hands. She forgot her yellow hair, her whip-crack wit, her soft, warm hugs. She forgot the girl who loved her, the crusader with a chip on her shoulder, and she forgot how they died exactly one month apart, how the streets ran scarlet in the August heat.

She forgot the boy with kindness in his voice and fear in his eyes, the boy who died and the finger they buried. She forgot the snake in lion’s clothing who killed him and the scarred, broken shell of a man he’d lied about loving and left behind.

She forgot Halloween.

…

She forgot standing alone in a churchyard, carving words on a slab of white marble. She forgot a familiar face, a form in the corner of her eye, and she forgot the words she yelled at him as he tried to explain.

“I loved—”

“Don’t you fucking dare, Snivellus.”

…

The last thing she forgot was a road called Privet Drive, and a neat little house filled with secrets and pain and a crying boy with eyes she’d spent ten long, beautiful years loving so much it almost hurt to look.

She forgot the feeling of night air on her face, cold and sharp, turning her tears to ice. She forgot knocking on the door, and the face Petunia Evans made when she pulled out her wand and froze her where she stood. She forgot the door to the cupboard under the stairs, and how she didn’t need to say a word before it burst into a shower of sparkling stars. She forgot holding Harry in her arms, and looking back to see a fat, blond baby bawling on the living room floor, and wondering just for a moment whether she ought to take him, too.

She forgot walking, then running, cradling a soft black head to her chest, too afraid to Apparate with such a fragile thing. She forgot the rage in her throat, on her tongue, when she saw the tall, slim man in silver robes, blocking her path.

He was there to take him away. He was there to take away her Harry, her godson, just like he took away her Lily. He threw her life away like it was nothing, nothing, nothing, when to Mary it was everything.

“You can’t,” she said. “You can’t send him back there, you can’t make me leave him.”

Of course he could.

“You won’t,” she said. “You won’t let them hurt him, you won’t close your eyes.”

Of course he would.

“You’re wrong,” she said. “You’re wrong if you think this is good. You’re wrong if you think there’s no choice.”

Of course he was.

But that had never mattered.

“Obliviate,” he said.

And Mary forgot.

#mary macdonald #lily evans #marylily #mary x lily #where do you put the cut when you write on this website??? it's so hard to decide!!!!#trying out short-form #but i struggle with restraint #fanfiction #marauders fanfiction #marylily fic #marylily microfic #what is a microfic? saw it in the suggested tags and i think this probably counts bc it's only 1k but lmk if i have abused the tag #marauders #marauders era #my fanfiction #fuck dumbledore #dumbledore bashing #the obliviation of mary macdonald #obliviate

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sealrock · 17 days

Text

10. stable

cw: depiction of trans pregnancy word count: 983 words

"Do you think we can give this baby a stable life?"

Andromache's question filtered back into Achille's mind, though it came back nearly four moons too late now that he was holding said baby in his arms.

While it was easy not to think about before her arrival, Achille couldn't help but feel a tinge of anxiety settle in his heart as he watched Paris, the oddly masculine name her parents bestowed her, slumbered against his shirt. He found himself gently stroking her slick black hair, and he was suddenly reminded of the day his younger brother was born. Protected by soft swaddling clothes, a gift from Hector's mother, Paris looked like his brother, and most newborn babies—wrinkly, pale, and a bit ugly.

A soft orange glow filled the room from the open window, the fresh air trickling inside as the summer sun took its leave behind the treeline. Achille's ears picked up the call of cicadas, crickets, and frogs as they announced dusk's arrival in the forest beyond. A few hours had passed since Paris came into the world, screeching to anyone who would listen, but Achille felt like time hadn't moved since. He forgot how long he sat in this chair, he couldn't feel anything except the delicate weight of an infant—his loved ones' infant—in his arms. She had a startling amount of strength as her hand gripped his thumb, her fingers too stubby to reach the other side.

On the bed lay Hector, drained and a little wan, sound asleep and bundled in blankets, his long hair unbound. Despite the mugginess of the day, Hector was shivering like he had been in a snowstorm. Andromache, high off of pure adrenaline for the last seventy-two hours, crashed unsurprisingly after the delivery, her upper body halfway on the bed while she sat seated on Hector's left side, their hands intertwined. Achille wasn't allowed inside the birthing room, not that he wanted to be in there, the screams of pain and cries of agony were enough to keep him outside the house entirely. He did his best to offer Andromache some support, the girl unable to do much besides pace around and pull at her hair.

He wasn't even the father, yet Achille couldn't sleep a wink. When it was all said and done, Andromache practically twisted his arm to accept holding her daughter, a word she said with shaky pride. Yes, this was her daughter, and Achille didn't want to hurt her. His hands only knew how to kill, not to love. He wasn't suited to offer a child a life of stability, and if he was being honest, neither were Andromache or Hector. They were all young, much too young, and dealing with their own personal emotional baggage, to take on such a responsibility.

"Do you want an honest answer or a hopeful lie?"

Achille looked on from his corner of the candle-lit living room, situated away from Hector on the couch, watching as Andromache gingerly rested her head on their partner's lap, her ear pressed against his growing belly. With her hair petted by Hector, Andromache's back was against the couch cushions, her legs dangling off the side and crossed at the ankles. Her glittering eyes, full of wonderment in the likes Achille had never seen up until then, narrowed at his response as she regarded him upside-down. Hector could only chuckle, his eyes hooded by dark bangs.

"I think everything will be fine."

"How can you be so sure?"

Hector lifted his gaze to look at Achille, his expression calm and voice gentle:

"Because I have two bodyguards who wouldn't dare let anything go wrong."

Achille could feel the blush creep up his neck as he gave a crooked smile, "Is that all I am to you, hired muscle?"

"You know my meaning," Hector glanced down to Andromache before looking away, "You're more than that to me, both of you. We'll be alright because your love will extend to this child. They'll know nothing but love, protection, and guidance from all of us."

Achille shrugged, "I don't think I'm cut out for that."

"Don't be so modest," it was Andromache's turn to speak up, "You're just as much a parent to this child as we are."

Achille would never have children, the torturous days of his younger years rendering that impossible, but Andromache's words stuck to him since then.

Paris wriggled in his arms, little odd squeaks coming from her mouth as Achille brought himself back to the present. Achille froze, not knowing what to do as the noises grew louder. He also remembers this from his younger brother, how annoyed he felt at the sound of a crying infant.

"Put him back," was all the young boy said to the adults in the room.

His father could only laugh at the bluntness of his son's words. Achille could remember his father ruffling his hair in affection before the wailing monstrosity of a baby could be taken from his tiny arms.

"Achille?"

Achille jerked up from his seat, eyes landing on Hector and Andromache, both now wide awake despite only getting a few hours of sleep. Paris continued to cry as he awkwardly passed her along into her father's waiting arms. Hector looked like shite, but he beamed at the sight of his newborn, cooing and shushing her from his place in bed.

Andromache, equally haggard, gave a soft smile before stretching her legs. She led a dumbfounded Achille out of the room to give Hector some privacy, softly closing the door behind them as they stood in the hallway.

"You asked me this a while ago," Achille found his voice, his throat restricted with an odd emotion, "You asked if we could give Paris a stable life. Could we?"

Andromache scrubbed at her face as she considered his words. To that, she replied:

"Like Hector said, we'll be fine."

#ffxivwrite2024 #ffxivwrite #mywritings.#*explodes and dies forever*#this got way too long but anyway. a peek into paris' first hours of life #welcome to the world here's your 3 weird parents #as a remider: andromache and hector are t4t

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dark-elf-writes · 2 months

Note

“Slytherin isnt bad,” the red headed boy on the train says to Harry. “My brother Percy is one. According to my other brothers Fred and George, nobody does anything without his say so.” Ron grind. “Malfoy is in for a sore surprise when he gets in and they don’t just pander to him. Bet he’s expecting it.”

Percy, who stopped by to check on his youngest brother and summoned Neville’s toad. Who had offered to place a small spell on their door to prevent people who just wanted to see the Boy Who Lived from finding them.

(Percy who looked at his youngest brother and saw a badger instead of a lion. Who'd already pulled the twins aside before to tell them it didn't matter where they went. Who had been the first to clap when two redheads went to Ravenclaw, their love of knowledge even it was to learn to prank leading them.)

Its a different Harry sitting under that hat.

(sorry couldn't resist)

Harry who gets support and care from the moment he meets the Weasleys.

Who makes a friend over a pile of junk food and failed spells. Who laughs so hard he nearly chokes on a chocolate frog when Ron makes a face at whatever terrible flavor of bean he got. Who is still feeling light and bubbly with joy when they talk about houses and Harry confesses he’s heard some… things from Hagrid that he didn’t know how to feel about (as kind as Hagrid had been, Harry had never trusted a word from an adult’s mouth. Adults lied all the time whether on purpose or because they had lied to theirselves so much that they tricked themselves into thinking they knew the truth. Adults had lied about him for years after all, accused him of things he didn’t do or called him bad for things that Dudley made up. Why would he trust them?).

Ron, surprisingly, gets serious at his words. Sits up straight and looks at him with those deep blue eyes and a smudge of dirt on his nose.

“No house is all good or all bad. My brother told me that, and he’s pretty much always right. Percy has been in Slytherin for years and he’s not dark or evil or whatever. He still holds Gin when she cries and fusses when I try to eat dessert before dinner. ‘S just a place, innit? Places don’t make you bad just by being places.” The serious mask cracks and suddenly Ron looks just as impish as his brother had when they had been yelling about toilet seats. “‘Sides, Percy is there. If anyone could turn a bad place good it’s him. Even tossers like Malfoy won’t stand a chance against him.”

Harry isn’t so sure how one person could make an entire house good (the train was bloody massive and if even a forth of the people on it were Slytherins what was still a lot of bloody Slytherins). Or at least, he wasn’t until he met Percy Weasley.

He was already in his robes, perfectly pressed and unapologetically green around the edges as he eased their door open. He takes in the sight of them, still red faced with joy and surrounded by sweets and wrappers alike, before tossing a wrapped sandwich (different from the smashed one Ron had pulled form his pocket earlier, perfectly preserved with Ron’s name written on it in a meticulous hand) to Ron with a pointed look.

“Eat something of substance, and try not to ruin your dinner, Ronald. Do share with your friend too. The two of you need something other than sugar in you or you will both be sick halfway through dinner.”

Percy didn’t seem evil. A bit fussy maybe, protective certainly after he had headed off a group of giggling older girls whisper Harry’s name and peering into compartments, downright kind when he had helped Neville find his toad and had passed it back to the trembling boy with steady hands and a soft look that screamed older brother. He just seemed like a person. A nice person even. Harry could have picked him and Ron out as brothers even without their matching noses and hair.

Harry thought he liked him. Even if he was getting close to being an adult.

It was Percy’s expression as he handed Neville his toad and Ron’s voice in his ears (“Places don’t make you bad just by being places.”) that Harry held in his mind as the hat fell over his eyes and a voice resonated in his head. An adult voice. Did hats count as adults?

“You would thrive in any house you know,” That voice croons too close and too loud in the space between his ears. Harry was definitely regretting all the pumpkin pasties before dinner now. “But you already seem to have your mind made up.”

Cunning and ambition weren’t bad. Weren’t evil. They had kept him alive after all. Had kept him one step ahead of his relatives and the bullies and everyone else that wanted to hurt him. And places were just places. And Percy Weasley wasn’t evil.

Harry Potter held his head high (not that anyone could tell with the hat dwarfing him) as the hat screamed its decision to the room.

“SLYTHERIN!”

Ron’s voice broke through the stunned silence, hooting and cheering as he jumped around in the dwindling group of unsorted first years. Three more voices joined his, just as delighted, just as kind, just as loud. His brothers from both Slytherin and Ravenclaw, filling the silence with their joy for him. With their celebration of who Harry was despite what others might think. After another heartbeat there were big booming claps from behind him, Hagrid, celebrating him even through his general nervousness around Slytherin.

They were the only ones who cheered. Harry didn’t mind as he handed the hat back and claimed the seat Percy had cleared for him under the heavy eyes of the headmaster and the rest of Hogwarts.

(Harry made sure to cheer just as loud for Ron when he was sorted into Hufflepuff, shouting until his voice strained and Percy nudged a cup of tea toward him with a pointed look and a smile that took away all hear that might have been behind it.)

#the elf talks #Harry Potter #slytherin percy au

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spadesolace · 1 year

Text

love you twice: get up

synopsis: after an entire month of chaos, everything was back to square one; after the break up around the spring of 2021 where the pair are avoidant of each other.

warning/s: mentions of bullying, mentions of physical violence, one sided feelings, a bit of angst, curse words

words: 3.2k

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To say the least, Haerin was not expecting this.

She had a hunch of Minwon’s disloyalty. Nothing goes past her observant eyes. The slight difference in his actions, his schedule, it was clear that they were drifting apart. No one was brave enough to say anything, letting it drift slowly. It all started when she noticed the way that multiple girls had the same bracelet as hers. She didn’t think much of it. Benefit of the doubt, the possibility of it being an it item was not far off. It was a simple bracelet with a green heart. Haerin didn’t question it but let it be, waiting for the right moment for someone to bring him down. It wasn’t her loss, she’s moved on from her so-called boyfriend who clearly was done with the relationship.

When Hanni called while they were at a party hosted by someone she doesn’t know but YN is probably close with, she was expecting a hope you were here with us. Something along the lines of we miss you or we’re doing fine, YN got a bit tipsy.

Who wouldn’t be shocked and broken to see her own (ex-)boyfriend kissing a random girl out in the open and wearing the same bracelet she removed months ago. Or the fact that her best friend was looking at them intently. Haerin knew YN like the back of her hand; the fact that she probably got violent wasn’t far off. The protective side of YN that people adore so much, that some wish to experience. It was also the messy side of YN, the way she’d let her protectiveness get the best of her. The image of YN’s bruised knuckles as she punched a guy who took pictures of Haerin in the locker rooms, or the way she had no emotions as she kept throwing punches.

Haerin isn’t there to stop YN. She couldn’t protect her or stop her if things went south.

All she could do was end the call, only to see a bunch of mentions on her socials. Checking it was a mistake, an instant regret, seeing multiple pictures of Minwon with different girls wearing the same bracelet. He even missed her birthday just to kiss some girl. There was even a picture of Minwon kissing Eunji. She doesn’t know if he went after her after their breakup. Maybe that was where the comments of Minwon regarding their relationship was pointing out. How much of a jerk he is to even lowkey flex that he’s cheating. Is that why they ended things? Did YN know before they broke up or was this after their breakup?

Haerin’s mind was running with multiple questions, some were unclear, some made sense. Multiple messages from the group chat, private messages, and Minwon spamming her. Her social battery is too drained to deal with him, yet it concerned her that there were no messages from YN.

How would she react? As her best friend, furious and hatred would be there. As her ex, was she ecstatic? They’re both single, again.

At 12AM, Haerin had cried her heart out. Laying in her bed, lights off, only the silence and her frog plush to keep her company. Yet, she wasn’t expecting anyone to knock at their front door at midnight. If there is one, she was more so expecting Minwon but she won’t open the door, she’ll let him suffer. Let him wait outside for no one to answer, and end things on text, block him, remove any traces of him. He wasn’t worth fighting for. Yet, it wasn’t him knocking on their door, waiting on the front porch, Haerin could see the familiar silhouette from the window.

She wasn’t expecting to get a text from her best friend. She wasn’t expecting YN in front of her holding a bag filled with snacks. Haerin never expected that her best friend would arrive hours after the call holding her favourite snacks, a plushy of a frog, and panting as if she had run to her house. She expected the fast pace of her heartbeat, the way YN just dropped everything only to hug her. The feeling of safety and comfort in one person, Haerin wasn’t expecting to bawl her eyes out. She wasn’t expecting the way YN kept silent when she’d usually talk about hurting anyone who crosses a line.

YN noticed the way Haerin looked lost, hurt, disappointed, and overall just in pain. She wasn’t expecting this, it was painful for her to watch Haerin suffer. Everything would reflect back to her, YN had read a few comments here and there. It was expected that some of the guys who are close to Minwon would praise and protect his image, and blame Haerin for not being the best girlfriend. Luckily there were those who sympathised with her, teaching those that Haerin was not at fault, some understanding that Haerin isn’t one to take things fast or let alone show affection. That made YN curious… Within almost entirely a year of them together, did Haerin let him kiss her?

Haerin woke up earlier than YN. It’s been so long since the last time she slept next to her, who was holding her closely. The rain kept pouring and hitting her window, she felt at ease or perhaps its the way that her ex is holding her securely, afraid that she’ll fall. It was already morning, all she could remember was crying, watching movies, and hearing YN that she was safe, that Minwon won’t bother her anymore.

Around this time, Minwon would arrive at her house, staying for lunch or just visiting. She was waiting… waiting for the door to open, waiting for YN to wake up and expect the worst. He didn’t arrive, there was no harsh knocking on her bedroom door, or how her parents would announce his arrival with a hint of venom. It wasn’t like the way her parents would mention that YN was waiting for her to walk to school together or when she would drop something off. She was safe, for now.

It didn’t take long for Haerin to fall asleep again, the rain was perfect as she snuggled closer to YN. Her head between the crook of her neck, holding YN in case she might fall off. It’s been so long since she felt the comfort and safety that her best friend (or ex) emitted, it was Sunday, nothing to do but only relax and prepare for the following days to come.

As the pair slept peacefully wrapped around each other, the rain pouring, and the Kang’s patiently waiting downstairs for the pair to come down. In all honesty, no one wanted to bother the two, two years since they broke up, and maybe it was time to repair that tear. Sadly, all good things must come to an end, their friends decided to visit Haerin. Hyein had informed the others that there was a high chance of her sister staying over at the Kang residence. To say the least, it was a shock to the group to see the two cuddling, let alone be so vulnerable to each other. It didn’t go past Hyein as she took multiple pictures, it was a sight to see especially with it being 2 years of some form of tension. Minji woke YN up, Hanni with Haerin.

“mmhh… five more minutes.” “stop…”

“Wake up, unnies. I have blackmail material, remember.”

Hearing Hyein, the pair opened their eyes only to make eye contact. YN was clearly panicking, Haerin remained stiff and silent, nothing about their position or the lingering eyes were ok. Especially that Hyein had a bright smile on her face.

The day went on with the group cheering Haerin up, blocking Minwon on all their socials and avoided mentioning him or anything that was related to him. Hyein had pulled her sister aside for a bit, the group being too busy with Haerin that they didn’t notice the sisters were gone. YN had expected at some point after her breakup with Eunji that Hyein would interrogate her, ask her everything and her emotions.

“Unnie, are you ok?” was she? With everything that has happened in a span of three weeks, was she actually ok?

“I don’t know. I should be…”

“But?”

YN couldn’t look at Hyein, there was something holding her tears back, the screams, the way she felt the need to hurt or break something. She couldn’t. Not in front of Haerin.

“Hye… you know how much I love her. It’s just-”

“Complicated?”

The older Lee nodded, looking at the group only to see Haerin staring at them intently. She needed some outlet, some form of way to let her emotions out because she knew she shouldn’t jump right into it. Not when Haerin just got out of a relationship.

“Well… what do you want to do?”

“What do you mean?”

“Unnie.” Hyein placed her hand on YN’s shoulders, looking intently at her sister. She knows this well enough that it was serious, there was no turning back to whatever Hyein had to say.

“Grieve if you have to, you never got the chance once things ended with Eunji. Let everything out, go on a walk, write it out. I’m scared to lose you again because of a relationship, unnie.”

One thing that Hyein learned was that YN bottles everything up. She watched her sister lose herself when things ended with Haerin, the same lifeless eyes but once in front of her first love, the spark was there. It was clear that YN never stopped loving her and when things ended with Eunji, someone she hoped would fill that hole, everything went dark. The older Lee tried her best to keep up the act, but Hyein noticed everything from how any trace of Eunji in her room was gone, replaced with things that reminded her of Haerin.

“Ok, I- I’ll find an outlet.”

“I’ll be here, unnie.”

After their conversation, after that day, there was a big shift within the group. Haerin ended things with Minwon in text and in person when he tried to talk to her. People started hating on the guy but there was still a large following of people who admire him, either way, Minwon was still determined to get Haerin back.

On the other side, YN was avoiding Haerin, the same way Haerin was avoiding her. Hyein took notice, spending her time with Haerin more as she could talk with YN at home. The group got too tired of the drift, the distance, both Minji and Hanni deciding to talk to the two privately. Minji was closer to YN, similarly Hanni was close with Haerin as well. It didn’t take long for Minji to visit the Lee sisters, confronting YN. Wanting to resolve whatever happened between the two because there was something else. Something a midst that neither Minji, Hanni, or Danielle could get a grasp of.

“YN, be honest. Why are you avoiding Haerin? Shouldn’t you be comforting her?” YN was not budging for the past 30 mins, somehow working out in their garage with her father’s punching bag.

“Minji, I wish I could tell you.”

“Then tell me.”

YN wanted to, she always wanted to tell people how much she loves Haerin. How much she thinks of the girl, how much she cares, and how much she wished she didn’t agree to end things years ago. Nothing came out. She kept throwing punches, faster and a bit unstable.

“Minji-unnie, she’ll tell you when she’s ready.”

“Hyein, you tell me.”

Hyein could only look at her sister in defeat, she wanted to fix things between YN and Haerin but she couldn’t do so if no one else knew why.

“YN l-“

“I love her, Minji.” One single blow, one hit, everyone fell silent. Minji wasn’t expecting the sudden confession, the way she simply uttered those words as if it were that easy. It explains a lot, from how YN never liked Minwon or how Eunji was always a second best compared to Haerin. Everything fell into place and Minji saw everything clearly.

“Why avoid her?”

“I wanted to process everything that’s happened within this month. Eunji and I broke up, Minwon has been cheating for who knows how long, and Hae… gosh. I’m causing more trouble and pain for her with this whole ordeal.”

Minji and Hyein looked at each other. One of them knew what to do, but she hoped to god that Hanni has the answer to it when they talk about it later. Minji took a deep breath, Hyein waiting patiently, and she finally let it out.

“Then fight for her. I’ve seen you threaten those boys when they made comments about the whole situation. You’re hiding your knuckles so clearly you threw a few punches. Avoiding Haerin wouldn’t fix anything.”

“But confessing that I still love her wouldn’t either.”

Minji was more surprised, what did she mean by still love her? There was something deeper within the pair. Hyein knew where this was going, Minji wouldn’t stop until everything was clear. The oldest of the three listened intently to YN talk about her relationship with Haerin from the very beginning.

“What do you mean by that…?”

“You think I didn’t fight for her? I did, for years I’ve defended her against those malicious comments from Minwon’s friends and the girls who were so into him.” YN threw a punch towards the punching bag, letting some frustration out. Then another, and another, until she started breaking down, slowly descending to the ground. Everything finally caught up to her and all she could do was wallow in the pain.

“I don’t know what to do… I want our relationship to go back to the way they were. I miss her so fucking much.” Minji and Hyein wrapped their arms around the girl, not knowing how long she’s felt this way but there was a sign that could lead them to somewhere both Haerin and YN could be happy.

“Continue fighting for her. Not in the shadows, not behind her back, fight for her as if your life depended on it. Tell her everything but be patient.”

She finally looked at the two, Hyein with a small smile and nodding to every word that Minji said while Minji gave her a reassuring smile that things would be fine. Having a new sense of hope, she listened intently. YN never realized how much of a leader Minji was until she said those words. Maybe it was time she actually fought back, fought for her and their relationship. This time would be different, this time she’ll wait patiently for Haerin to open her heart again in hopes that she’ll let her back in. God knows how much she misses and loves Kang Haerin.

At the same time, within the Kang household, where Hanni and Danielle confronted Haerin. She wouldn’t budge, playing with her frog plushies that mostly came from YN, or the way she’d look at her phone waiting for something but nothing came up. Hanni wouldn’t stop asking her why she’s avoiding YN and Danielle could only hold the older girl back.

“Haerin, just give us something to work with. YN has been your best friend since you were born, so why avoid her now?” Haerin was tired of the interrogation, Danielle was ready to call it a night, concluding that she wouldn’t say anything at all. That was it, Haerin was tired of hiding, she knows deep down she’s still in love with YN but Minwon and Eunji were in the picture.

“I don’t want her to be my best friend anymore.” The pair was taken aback, was this the end of their friendship? Was this the end of a generation-long bond that started years ago? They couldn’t believe what they were hearing and Hanni was close to ending it all, making all hell break loose until Haerin finally let the truth come out.

“I want her back, as my girlfriend.”

“Wait… BACK??? YOU MEAN?!”

Haerin told them everything, from how she met YN, how she fell, and how they remained friends. Clearly, there was still some tension that the entire group felt long before but never mentioned it. Hanni and Danielle knew everything in Haerin’s point of view, the same way Both Haerin and YN are glad to have friends like them, especially ones that are willing to fix things from a problem that started when they were kids. To say the least, it was slowly working that the two are trying to reconnect and fix their relationship.

The subtle way of YN walking with Haerin to school and going home together. How Haerin is sitting next to YN more and more as each day passes by, the lingering touches of their fingers and the way they both would stutter at each other. No one still made a move, no one admitted to their feelings and clearly Hanni wasn’t having it.They did the most stupid thing ever by locking the two in a closet at Minji’s place. Screaming along the lines of you don’t get out unless you talk things out.

Within the first three minutes, utter silence, nothing. They were used to it but this time, it was a bit awkward, a bit tense and yet there was comfort. Haerin decided to break the ice, she had to at some point.

“Uhm… Hanni mentioned you were the one that gathered everything to expose Minwon.” YN nodded, patting the space next to her for Haerin to sit, as it was going to be a long serious conversation. She doesn’t know where to start, how to start, because what would she tell her ex that she still loves her after all these years?

“Thank you for showing me his true colors.” Haerin could only look at the girl, eyes glossy, on the verge of crying. She missed this, the close proximity, being vulnerable, and just alone with YN.

“You know I’ll always fight for you, even before.” YN gave her a sad smile, reminiscing on their past relationship. Young, dumb, and stupid, as they would describe it but she was willing to fight for Haerin. She cares for the girl more than anyone else would.

“I-” “Uhm.”

YN let Haerin speak first, she always let the cat-like girl speak out before her own. She knows how easily influenced she can be if she confesses right away. The thing is, Haerin doesn’t know how to say it, what would she do just to say that she is still smitten by the same girl from when they were kids that she deemed as her prince charming.

“Do you think things would be different if we didn’t hide our relationship? If we were still together right to this moment, would we have changed?”

“Yeah, I think so, we’ve matured enough to know what we want and when we want it.”

The longing look in Haerin’s eyes, slowly reaching for YN’s hand only to intertwine it. There was no need to ask the question of whether they still love the other, no. Next thing YN knew was Haerin kissing her like their first time, slowly holding onto YN’s cheek and never letting her other hand go. Once they pulled away, YN could only look at Haerin’s eyes, she needs an answer.

“Hae… I don’t wanna fight your shadow.” Haerin knew that line all too well, she knew it by heart as it was YN’s way of telling her to fight for her, fight for us. I’m tired of hiding. Right from the very beginning, Haerin was still scared but willing to take the risk.

“Will you wait for me?”

“Always, Hae.”

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