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schizophreniachronicles-blog · 6 years ago

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The road i have taken

PRACTICAL STEPS TO TAKE ( THE ROAD TO RECOVERY FROM SCHIZOPHRENIA) BY HOMINE SIMPLICE

10.7.18 (6:40AM-8:15 AM) 1) FIND THE ROOTCAUSE: A) - IS IT DRUG RELATED? - USE OF MARIJUANA/SHABU/COCAINE/HASH HISH/WEED/MIND ALTERING DRUGS - STOP TAKING IT/DETOXIFY - SEEK DRUG REHABILITATION AND MEDICATION FROM A PSYCHIATRIC INSTITUTION. - WILL TRIGGER VOICES/VISIONS/HALLUCINATIONS B) IS IT BECAUSE OF UNREPENTED AND TOO MUCH SIN? (ONLY IF YOU BELIEVE IN GOD) DEUTERONOMY 28: 28-29/DEUTERONOMY 28:45 1 CORINTHIANS 3:15-20/ 1 CORINTHIANS 6:12-20 JAMES 5:13-15 - CONFESS TO GOD DIRECTLY(CHRISTIANS)/ OR A PRIEST(ROMAN CATHOLIC) ALL YOUR KNOWN SINS FROM THE TIME IN CHILDHOOD WHEN YOU LEARNED WHAT IS GOOD AND EVIL, UNTIL THE PRESENT TIMES. -SEEK RELIGIUOS INTERVENTION - PRAY OVER AND ANOINTING OF THE SICK BY ELDERS OF THE CHURCH C) IF YOU THINK IT IS AN ATTACK OF THE EVIL SPIRITS OR THE DEVIL( NOT FALLING UNDER CATEGORY A/B/D/E/F). - SEEK AN EXORCIST - READ THE BOOK OF TOBIT IN THE BIBLE(VIA INTERNET/GOOGLE IT!) ( SALTED FISH HEART AND LIVER AND INCENSE PUT OVER COALS, THE SMOKE WILL DRIVE AWAY THE EVIL SPIRITS AND WILL NOT COME BACK/TOBIT 6:8) D) IF IT IS CAUSED BY THE ENVIRONMENT? - ABUSIVE AND AGGRESSIVE PARENTS - MOLESTATION( SEXUAL AND VERBAL ABUSE) - PLACES THAT ARE NOT PEACEFUL AND CONDUCIVE TO LIVING(NO PEACE OF MIND). - SQUATTER AREA - TOO MUCH POVERTY - SO MANY FAILURES AND DISAPPOINTMENTS IN LIFE(EMOTIONAL TURMOILS) -HAUNTED PLACES SOLUTION: AVOID TOXIC PEOPLE AND GET OUT OF THE ENVIRONMENT FAST!

E) CAUSED BY INFECTION OF THE WOMB OF THE MOTHER DURING PREGNANCY? - TREAT IT MEDICALLY F) SAD EVENTS IN LIFE THAT TRIGGERED SCHIZOPHRENIA: - DEATH OF A FAMILY MEMBER OR LOVED ONE - LOSS OF A JOB - BEING BANKRUPT -BEING HEARTBROKEN - NO PEOPLE TO TALK TO OR VENT OUT - FEELING ISOLATED - NO SUPPORT SYSTEM - FEELING OF LIFE HAS NO MEANING - IT IS A DEADEND/I WANTED TO GIVE UP - EVERYTHING IS WORTHLESS -BOTTLED EMOTIONS - FEELING LOW - TOO MUCH FRUSTRATIONS AND TRIALS IN LIFE - FEELING SUICIDAL/TO HURT SOMEBODY OR SELF SOLUTION: IF YOU CANNOT SLEEP WELL FOR MORE THAN 5 DAYS, SEEK MEDICAL HELP FROM A PSYCHIATRIST. PRESCRIPTION FO RIVOTRIL MIGHT BE NEEDED. ASK YOUR DOCTOR FOR SLEEPING PILLS. EACH PERSON HAS A UNIQUE PAIN AND FRUSTRATION LEVEL HE OR SHE CAN ENDURE. CASE TO CASE BASIS. SOME ARE ONION SKINNED. - IT IS SAID IN THE ENCYCLOPEDIA THAT HAVING NO SLEEP FOR 5 �� DAYS WILL MAKE YOU MAD AND IRRITABLE.( SEARCH THE INTERNET FOR TRUTH ABOUT THIS). G) GENETICS- YOU GET IT FROM YOUR GENES, PARENTS, GRANDPARENTS , RELATIVES. 2) SEEK MEDICAL HELP FROM A PSYCHIATRIST WHO HAD 20-40 YEARS OF EXPERIENCE. THE OLDER THE BETTER. SINCE MEDICATION IS BY TRIAL AND ERROR, AN EXPERIENCED PSYCHIATRIST CAN MAKE A SIGNIFICANT DIAGNOSIS AND A WIDER KNOWLEDGE OF THE RANGE OF MEDICATIONS TO TRY ON THE PATIENTS. 3) RELY ON GOD FOR HIS MERCY - READ AND BE KNOWLEDGEABLE UP TO WHAT YOU CAN COMPREHEND ONLY. YOU COULD NOT MASTER EVERYTHING IN A LIFETIME. DO NOT DWELL ON MYSTICISM AND NEW AGE STUDIES( ACCORDING FR GABRIEL AMORTH, CHIEF EXORCIST OF THE VATICAN) OR HIGH FALLUTING WISDOM. - “A LITTLE KNOWLEDGE IS A DANGEROUS THING. SO IS A LOT”- ALBERT EINSTEIN - MEDICATION TAKES TIME TO TAKE EFFECT( 12-18 YEARS IN MY CASE) - TRY TO SLEEP 8 HOURS A DAY. - NOT TOO MUCH TV. WATCH NEWS ONLY, AND INTERESTING NEWS ABOUT MEDICAL BREAKTRHOUGHS/ENCOURAGING TOPICS IN BOOKS/SELF DEVELOPMENT/LISTEN TO GOOD MUSIC( CLASSICAL AND RELAXATION MUSIC) - YOU HAVE TO CHANGE YOUR LIFESTYLE TO SIMPLE AND CLEAN LIVING - NO DRUGS/NO WINE /NO WOMEN FROM THE SONG IN THE 80”S TURNING JAPANESA( LOL)

- BE PASSIONATE FOR HOBBIES - READ “DESIDERATA” POEM, YOU WILL GET AN INSIGHT WHY IT WAS TOP OF THE CHARTS IN 1970. - SHARE YOUR KNOWLEDGE AND EXPERIENCES TO OTHERS SUCH THAT OTHERS MAY LEARN FROM YOU AND LEAVE A LEGACY. SUCH THAT OTHERS WILL NOT COMMIT THE SAME MISTAKES IN LIFE. - PRAY DAILY(THANK HIM FOR THE DAILY BLESSINGS/ASK FOR DAILY FORGIVENESS OF SINS/ ASK FOR DAILY REQUESTS FOR YOU AND YOUR LOVED ONES). - GET WISDOM FROM READING THE BIBLE( EX PROVERBS/PSALM/ECCLESIASTES/SIRACH/PSALM 23/PSALM 3(UPON WAKING UP)/PSALM 4( BEFORE SLEEPING)/PSALM 15/PSALM 91. - LEARN TO MINGLE WITH THE LOWLY AND SIMPLE PERSONS, SOME OF THEM HAVE GREAT LIFE EXPERIENCES AND KNOWLEDGE, THOUGH UNEDUCATED. BUT YOU HAVE TO FILTER OUT THE TRUTH BY COMPARING WITH FACTS AND FIGURES(IN THE INTERNET). YOU SHOULD ALWAYS MAKE DECISIONS BASED ON DATA THAT YOU GATHERED. DO NOT JUMP THE GUN OR DO BY INSTINCT ONLY. - IT IS A TRIAL BY FIRE, SO BE STRONG AND COURAGIOUS!

4) WHAT THE PATIENT CAN DO: - LEARN TO LISTEN WELL - DO WHAT IS RIGHT EVEN IF THERE IS NO ONE WATCHING! - ONLY GOD KNOWS OUR FUTURE!

-GOD IS GOOD BOTH TO THE EVIL AND THE GOOD. -SEEK AND YOU SHALL FIND THE CURE

-PUT ORDER INTO YOUR LIFE AND HELP OTHERS

- HAVE AN OPEN EAR TO THOSE PEOPLE YOU LOVE - SURROUND YOURSELF WITH PEOPLE WITH WISDOM AND GODLY PEOPLE AVOID FALSE PROPHETS AND WOLVES IN SHEEP CLOTHING. AVOID TOXIC PEOPLE! - ADMIT THAT YOU ARE SICK. ALL OF US, EVEN NORMAL PEOPLE HAVE SOME KIND OF MADNESS AND INDIOSYNCRACIES. - IT TAKES A LOT OF MONEY AND TIME TO BE TREATED, LOOK FOR CHEAPER AND EFFECTIVE ALTERNATIVES. SEARCH THE INTERNET LIKE AN EAGLE! - GOD SAYS LEARN FORM THE ANT, THEY ARE UNEDUCATED BUT FALLS IN LINE, THEY HARVEST AND LOOK FOR FOOD DURING THE DRY SEASON AND WHEN IT RAINS, IT STAYS ON THE MOUND TO EAT THEIR FOOD. LEARN FORM THEM. 5) BONUS: - WHAT CAN A SCHIZOPHRENIC COULD POSSIBLY EXPERIENCE: ( THAT OTHERS WHO ARE NORMAL PEOPLE COULD NOT FEEL OR SEE/ IT IS THE BRAIN THAT RUN AMUCK/RUNAWAY/ THE BRAIN OVERPOWERS YOUR 5 COMMON SENSES). THE BRAIN SENDING MESSAGES TO THE EAR, HEARING VOICES OF MALE OR FEMALE CURSING YOU. THERE ARE THREATS AND LETTING YOU DO EVIL AND BAD THINGS. - THOUGHT BROADCASTING. YOU WILL THINK THAT ALL YOUR THOUGHTS ARE TRANSMITTED IN THE AIR, SO EVERYONE KNOWS WHAT YOU ARE THINKING. YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER IT. AND NOBODY UNDERSTANDS YOU. SOMEBODY HAS PLANTED SOME KIND OF A TRANSMITTER IN YOUR HEAD. - YOU THINK THAT ALIENS HAVE OVERPOWERED YOU AND OR SOME NEW WORLD ORDER OR HIGHER BEINGS/SPIRITS CONTROL OVER YOU. - YOU SMELL DIFFERENT ODORS LIKE DUNG OR POOP/EXCRETIONS/PERFUMES FLOWERS ETC. THAT OTHERS COULD NOT SENSE. - YOU EXPERIENCE A HAIR RAISING AND BLOOD CURDLING VISIONS EXAMPLE SEEING THE DEVIL AND HIS COHORTS. POINTING AT YOU. - YOU THINK THAT OTHERS ARE TALKING ABOUT YOU, AND WOULD LIKE TO HARM YOU. PERSECUTORY THOUGHTS. - YOU THINK YOU ARE COMMUNICATING TO CHARACTERS IN THE TV OR CPHONE - YOU BELIEVE THAT YOU HAVE SOME SPECIAL POWERS DELEGATED ONLY TO YOU, LIKE SAVING THE WHOLE WORLD OR YOU ARE OF GREAT IMPORTANCE( ROYAL BLOOD)/ YOU ARE A KING OR SOMEBODY LIKE SUPERMAN WITH SPECIAL FUNCTIONS ONLY DELEGATED TO YOU BY A SUPERNATURAL FORCE. - YOU BELIEVE IN THE DEVIL /EVIL SPIRITS TOO MUCH ,THAT IT CAN OVERPOWER YOU AND LORD OVER YOU( READ THE BOOK OF JOB IN THE BIBLE. THE DEVIL HAS POWERS ON YOU .ONLY IF HE HAS BEEN GRANTED PERMISSION BY GOD. TO TRY YOUR FAITH) -TALKING EYES, JUST BY LOOKING AT THE EYES OF PERSONS, YOU CAN READ THEIR MINDS JUST LIKE READING LIPS. - YOU FEEL THOUSAND OF NEEDLES PRICKING THE WHOLE OF YOUR BODY. - RAZOR SHARP BLADES SLASHING YOUR FACE AND BLOOD OOZING BUT YOU CANNOT AND OTHERS SEE THE BLOOD BUT YOU CAN FEEL IT. - YOU THINK YOU HAVE TELEKINESIS. - ACID BEING POURED ON YOUR PATE, YOU FEEL YOUR BRAINS BURNING AND DISSOLVING, YOU SMELL THE FLESH AND HAIR BURNING. IT HURTS BUT YOU CANNOT DO ANYTHING. - YOU FEEL METAL NAILS BEING PLANTED IN YOUR BRAIN. - YOU THINK YOU HAVE KNOWLEDGE OF HIDDEN TREASURES/WEALTH ETC THAT IS WHY YOU KEEP ON COMPUTING AND SKETCHING. - YOU HAVE SEEN A LOT OF HORROR MOVIES, IT IS NOW BECOMING A REALITY TO YOU. SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH THE SUCCUBUS OR INCUBUS -ETC. PLEASE ASK ANYONE WHO HAS SURVIVED THE ORDEAL, AND HE/SHE WILL TELL YOU HOW HORRIBLE IT WOULD BE.

MATTHEW:7:7-8: Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: GOOD LUCK AND GOD BLESS!

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the-wandering-whumper · 7 years ago

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Big Ass Tag Game

Rules: Tag whoever you want!

I find glasses attractive: True

I find beanies attractive: False

Last song you listened to: Hallelujah by Pentatonix

Last YouTube video you watched: The YEET vine

Favorite YouTubers: Jeremy Johns, he reviewes movies, Honest Trailers (Screen Junkies) and anyone who collects/posts whump!

Last thing you Googled: Reasons an ask box would stop working

Private Island or Private Jet? - Island

Pancakes or Waffles? - Pancakes

Coffee or Tea? - Coffee

Water or Bubbly Water? - Water, bubbly water is gross

Pineapple on pizza? - YES

Do you like foods from a country other than your own? - Yes

Any crushes right now? - Always

Name drop? - Chris Evans, Toby Stephens

Do you write? - Yes

If yes, what’s the title of the last thing you worked on? - Untitled Timeless Fic

If no, or even yes, what’s the last thing you’ve read? - X-Ray + Penny - HISHE by @whumpadoodle (Ha! Me too Emrys!!)

Favorite meal food: mozzarella sticks

Favorite dessert food: ice cream and cake mashed up

Dream trip: River tour of Europe

Favorite restaurant: A little mom & pop place called Golden Harvest in East Lansing, MI

Thing(s) you’re trying to master: gif making, photoshop, photography, writing, html, guitar

Thing(s) you want but don’t have the money for: a Cannon 5D Mark III camera

Favorite color: Blue mostly, but I like green and purple, too

Low/High-key kink(s): Can I do tropes? Faves: collapse, getting shot, bleeding out, lap comfort, oxygen masks, intubation, I could go on :)

Favorite joke: Q: What did the fish say when he swam into the cement wall? A: Damn!

Word(s) you hate: moist, drool

Word(s) you love: love, yeet, fabulous, brilliant, hun

Sounds you hate: squelching, unless its from my faves blood, sounds of people retching, nails on a chalk board

Sounds you love: Infectious laughter, that sound a candle wick makes just as you blow out the flame

Favorite vine(s): Oh god, where do I even start? Basically all the famous ones: YEET, I coulda dropped my croissant, mind your business David, die for each other, chicken strips, you’ll never be anything duck, the one where they’re in a drive through and someone runs through screaming and grabs the food, Annie are you ok, you’re the one I need, essence of England, anything with that guy and his baby, roommates, chicken nuggets, and so many more!

Favorite TV Shows: I finally made a list, tho I’m sure I’m missing some:

HAWAII FIVE-O NCIS, NCIS:LA & NO THE FLASH SUPERNATURAL CHICAGO FIRE, MED, & PD STARGATE: SG1 & ATLANTIS MACGYVER WHITE COLLAR ENDEVOUR FARSCAPE AGENTS OF SHIELD LETHAL WEAPON TEEN WOLF STRIKE BACK (PORTER, SCOTT & STONEBRIDGE ERAS) BLINDSPOT X FILES STATION 19 SEAL TEAM THE BRAVE STARSKY & HUTCH

That was fun! Thanks for the tag @egg-with-a-butt! I’m tagging @beautifullywhumped @beautifullights1 @evilwriter37 @mashmaiden @lurkingwhump @alchemist-rising

#marie speaks #surveys

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i-love-me-a-lotta-whump · 7 years ago

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Big Ass Tag Game

Rules: Tag whoever you want!

I find glasses attractive: True

I find beanies attractive: True

Last song you listened to: Start Again - OneRepublic ft. Logic

Last YouTube video you watched: TASER TAG! TONGUE OR MONEY!! at TEMPEST Freerunning Academy - Elton Castee

Favorite YouTubers: Elton Castee, TFIL, Corbin Reinhardt, Sam and Colby, MiniLadd, CaptainSparklez, Ally Law, Ryan Taylor, Storror Blog, Night Scape

Last thing you Googled: poutine near me

Private Island or Private Jet? - Jet

Pancakes or Waffles? - waffles (with chicken)

Coffee or Tea? - Coffee

Water or Bubbly Water? - Water cus fuck bubbly water

Pineapple on pizza? - YES

Do you like foods from a country other than your own? - Yessssss

Any crushes right now? - Always

Name drop? - Corbin Reinhardt, Elton Castee, Sebastian Stan, Lucas Till, Tom Holland, Charlie Rowe, Jack Cutmore-Scott, Matt Czuchry

Do you write? - Fanfic, yes

If yes, what’s the title of the last thing you worked on? - Vegas Fight Club

If no, or even yes, what’s the last thing you’ve read? - X-Ray + Penny - HISHE by @whumpadoodle

Favorite meal food: crawfish

Favorite dessert food: cannolis

Dream trip: Tempest Freerunning Academy in California

Favorite restaurant: Founding Farmers in Washington DC

Thing(s) you’re trying to master: life??? nah lol precision jump, kong gainers and tic tacs

Thing(s) you want but don’t have the money for: a trip around the world

Favorite color: Black but some people don’t consider that a color so for those who don’t: red

Low/High-key kink(s): coughing, willingness to protect, humility, sarcasm, parkour/freerunning, pain, confidence, humor/funny, ETC. (I have so many)

Favorite joke: The elevator doors open into a bar. A mysterious man sits in the dark in the back. The guy walks out of the elevator and straight to the man in the dark. “Watcha drinkin’?” The guy asks. “Magic beer.” The man in the dark says. “No way.” The guy says. “Sure is. Watch this.” The man in the dark takes a sip, walks over to the balcony, flies around the building and comes back to sit in the same spot. “Woah! That’s incredible! Mind if I try?” The guy asks. “Go ahead.” The man in the dark answers. The guy downs the rest of the bottle, runs over to the balcony and jumps off, plummeting to his death on the sidewalk below. The bartender stops wiping down the bar, looks to the man in the dark and says, “You really are an ass when you drink, Superman.”

Word(s) you hate: oof, bae

Word(s) you love: y’all, yeet

Sounds you hate: kissing, babies/children screaming and crying, children laughing when there are no children around

Sounds you love: When my crush says literally anything, music, dogs doing an awoo

Favorite vine(s): Uh... Yeah I Sure Hope It Does, anything by Scotty Sire and Elton Castee and SO MANY MORE

Favorite TV Shows: The Resident, SEAL Team, MacGyver, The Flash, Arrow, Last Man Standing, Mom, The Big Bang Theory, Deception, ETmfC.

I’m tagging: @wolfypuppypiles @fyeahvulnerablemen @the-wandering-whumper @whumpadoodle and anyone else who wants to join!!!

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mikeroll · 7 years ago

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Legolas sucks LOL and Yondu is the ONE! Yes I spent 99 cents I didn’t have on that awesome song. Can’t get enough of HISHE. Too funny. #ink #yondu #is #the #one #arrow #guardiansofthegalaxy #legolas #sucks #sketch #sketchbook #pentelbrushpen #brushpen #art #illustration #laughter #fun #hishe @hishegram (at Four Corners, Florida)

#arrow #sucks #sketchbook #yondu #art #pentelbrushpen #ink #legolas #illustration #laughter #fun #the #one #guardiansofthegalaxy #hishe #sketch #is #brushpen

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goron-king-darunia · 8 years ago

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Sneak Peak of a Fic.

I’m writing a little fic for @hannikka so here’s a little preview of all my hard work. Hopefully it’s easy enough to understand because Richter is drunk as hell so I wrote him slurring his speech a bit. *~*~*~*~* “The day is finally here, Richter. The very last day. Tomorrow you can go free. Everything’s set up at the news network, so the weatherman position is yours if you want it. The renters have cleared out, so you can stay at my old home in Luin if you want to. I’ve got a lunch all packed for you to take with you tomorrow. And I’ve got everything we need to have a great farewell celebration tonight!” Richter smiled sadly. “You’ve done so much for me, Emil. Thank you. Really and truly. Thank you so much for doing all this for me.” “You’re my friend. My best friend, even! Of course I’d do anything for you!” Emil pat Richter on the shoulders. “So, how do you want to spend your last day? We can do whatever you want! I borrowed all your favorite books from the library, I rented some movies, got you a bottle of rum if you want to get totally wrecked. I’ve got cards, board games, I even rented a console and some video games if you want to play! I’ve got all your favorite snacks lined up. I’ll make whatever you want for dinner. I’ve got cake and tea and sparkling cider, a cozy nook to snuggle up in to do whatever we want. The day is yours.”

“Alright.” Richter nodded, finishing off the breakfast in bed that Emil had graced him with this morning. “Then answer this for me. How early in the day should I get totally wasted so we can play drunken board games?”

“Well, if you start drinking now you can be puking by noon, so… Whatever you want. Pace yourself and you can keep the buzz all day.” Emil teased. “Or, if you’re really that sick of being here, you can chug the whole damn bottle and die of liver failure.” “Don’t tempt me.” Richter teased right back. “Fuck over Ratatosk on the very last day and just ascend to another plane of existence.” “Alright, so what board game do you want to get wasted for this time?” “You remember that card one?”

“Machi Koro?” “No, no, the other one. The one we played with the centurions.” “Oh, you mean Cards Against Humanity?” “Yeah.” “Oh, holy hell, that’s going to be fun drunk.” “My thoughts exactly.” *~*~*~*~* 30 minutes in, and a shot for every loss, Richter was starting to see double and Pontus, that tiny little Polwiggle, was winning. “That little shquirt can’t even hold hish cardsh and he’sh kicking everyone’sh asshesh.” Richter slurred. He was losing badly. Aqua and Tenebrae were tied for third, Emil was a strong second, and Enki and Sedona had a few cards each. “If you ashked one thoushand yearsh ago if I thought I would end up at the door to hell, playing cardsh with monshtersh and Shummon Shpiritsh I would have laughed in your fache.” Richter let out a hoarse belch and Emil suggested he lay off the booze for a while. “It’s a game, Richter, not a suicide attempt. You can be exempt from losing shots for a while. Come to think of it, I think we’ve all had quite enough. Let’s just play normally.” “If you shay sho.” Richter took his last shot for losing the previous round, hiccuping a bit at the way the liquor burned. “Alright, get some food on top of that, Richter. Have a cracker or something. You’ve had, like, way too many for that to be healthy. Get some water in you too.” Richter complied, stuffing his face with a few pretzels and taking a long draught of water. “Whoshe turn ish it?”

“You’re card czar this round, Richter.“ “Right. Right…” Richter drew a black card, squinting at it and reading it aloud. “Daddy, why ish mommy crying?” Richter closed his eyes while he waited for the players to put in their cards. “M’kay. Why ish mommy crying?” Richter laughed at every response.

From Tenebrae - “Being fat and stupid.” From Aqua - “My collection of high-tech sex toys.” From Enki - “Your weird brother” From Sedona - “Wifely duties” From Pontus - “Crumbs all over the god damn carpet.” From Emil - “German dungeon porn.”

“I’m shorry. Theshe are all great, but I have to go with ‘German dungeon porn.’ It jusht shpeaksh to me.” “YES!” Emil cheered, taking the black card from Richter and adding it to his pile. “I knew that’d tickle you!” “To be fair, you had shome fierche competition. I almosht went with ‘Wifely dutiesh.’ ‘Crumbsh all over the dog gam carpet’ wash pretty good, too.” “Pffft! ‘Dog Gam.’ Richter, you’re too drunk.” “Prob’ly.” Richter hiccupped hoarsely, counting his white cards to make sure he hadn’t forgotten to draw last time. “M’kay. Ish your turn, Emil.” “Right.” Emil drew a black card. “War! What is it good for?” Richter was audibly laughing at his own addition when he put his in with the lot. Tenebrae - “Drinking Alone” Aqua - “A tribe of warrior women” Sedona - “Friendly fire” Pontus - “Bees?” Enki - “Cards Against Humanity” Richter - A completely blank card

Emil was confused by a certain submission. “Okay, I think I may need to close my eyes again. Someone forgot to fill in their free card.” Emil closed his eyes for a few moments but heard no shuffling or scribbling. “Is… is that intentional? Is the card supposed to be blank? Knock twice if the card is supposed to be blank.” Emil heard two knocks. “Well, I don’t get it, but okay…”Richter was gritting his teeth when Emil opened his eyes. It was the funniest thing he had ever done in his life, and the boy didn’t get it. “Alright. I guess I have to go with ‘a tribe of warrior women.” “YES! In your face, Tenebutt!” Aqua blew a raspberry at the other centurion, taking the black card and drawing a new white card. “Damn. Washted a perfectly good card.” Richter grumbled, drawing a replacement white card. “What did you put in?” “The blank one.” “I wondered about that. What was it supposed to mean?” “It’sh a shong.” Richter began to quietly sing. “War, huh, yeah. Wha-at ish it good for? Absholutely nothing.” The rest was mostly humming because Richter couldn’t remember the words. “Oh nooooo.” Emil hid his face. “I didn’t get it! I had no idea that was a song! That’s really funny! Can I retroactively give the point to Richter?” “Nooooo!” Aqua whined. “I need this point to beat Tenebrae! Don’t take away my point! I may never catch up to you and Pontus so third place is all I have!” “It’sh alright, Emil. I *hic* I should have picked something better. It’sh fine. Let Aqua have a point. I’m loshing anyway.” “No, you deserve a point! Here!” Emil handed over the black card he had won the previous round. “You deserve a point. Take one of mine.”

“But you’re loshing to a tadpole.” “I don’t mind! Just take it!” “Fine… fine… Thank you.” Richter reluctantly accepted the card. “Pontus is next.” Aqua announced, selecting a card and reading it aloud because Pontus, being a monster, couldn’t speak well. “Why am I sticky?” “Ish thish a general ‘I’ or Pontush shpechifically?” Pontus burbled. Aqua translated for him. “Pontus says whichever. Surprise him.” Richter - “Three dicks at the same time” Emil - “My genitals.” Aqua - “Edible underpants” Tenebrae - “This year’s mass shooting” Enki - “Sniffing glue” Sedona - “A bucket of fish heads”

Pontus burbled a bit before Aqua announced the winner for him. “Edible underpants is too specific, this year’s mass shooting is just fucking wrong, and three dicks at once is trying too hard, so the winner is ‘My genitals.’” “HAHA! Just two more and I’ll be in first place! Thanks Pontus.” Emil took the black card. “Pontus says ‘Fuck.’” Aqua laughed. “My turn. ‘What ended my last relationship?’” “Do you want us to speak from experience?” Tenebrae asked snidely. “Shut up!” Aqua snapped back. “If I had ‘German dungeon porn’ again, this would be a good place for it.” Emil laughed. “Literally every round hash been a good plache for ‘German dungeon porn.’” Richter laughed. Everyone handed in their cards. Sedona - “Copping a feel” Enki - “A really cool hat” Pontus - “Police brutality” Tenebrae - “Rape flavoring.” A custom card from someone who previously owned the game. Richter - “A sausage festival.” Emil - “My inner demons.” “Ooh, these are pretty great! ‘Rape flavoring’ hits a little close to home here, so I think I’m going to have to go with ‘a sausage festival!’” “Finally!” Richter cheered. “I’m beating Shedona at lasht!”

“Yay! I’m really glad I picked yours! That was great!” “You just picked it because it was an innuendo.” Tenebrae scoffed.

“Maybe, but it was still pretty funny! Even Emil laughed!” “It was pretty great, Richter. You earned it.” “Thanksh.” “No revenge for you yet, Sedona. It’s your turn.” “Mhm.” Sedona, being one of the more humanoid monsters, could speak fairly well, though it did sound like she was talking under water. “What are my parents hiding from me?” Richter - “Racism” Emil - “An oversized lollipop” Pontus - “Sexual tension” Tenebrae - “The gays” Aqua - “Cybernetic enhancements” Enki - “An M. Night Shyamalan plot twist” “Sexual tension is great, and an oversized lollipop is adorably innocent, but I have to go with ‘the gays.’ I imagine that happens a lot.” “Haha!” Tenebrae laughed triumphantly as he snatched the black card with the hand on his tail. “Another point for me. The stalemate resumes.” “NOOOOO!” Aqua threw her hand down, scattering her cards. “It’s not fair! I had terrible cards!” “Boo hoo. That’s part of the game. You’re allowed to spend some of your points to exchange them, you know.” “But I don’t want to spend my points! I don’t have any points to spare!” “Stop being a sore loser.” “Stuff it, you grumpy old man. You cheated to even get this far, you’re not nearly as funny as Master Richter!” “My points say otherwise.” Tenebrae showed off the black cards he’d won. “Not my fault the half-elf can’t hold his liquor.” “Technically, thish game ish very unfair to me becaushe I am the only one here that can eashily get drunk. You guysh are immortal shpiritsh and the monshtersh don’t drink…” “He’s got a point.” Emil giggled. “I can get tipsy but I didn’t lose nearly enough to take quite as many shots as you, Richter.” “Shpeaking of, got any more shnacksh?” Richter held up an empty bowl. “Gonna need more shtuff to shoak up all thish liquor.” “Coming right up.” Emil went to grab a bag of potato chips. “Try to share with the group, though. I want to have more than one chip before you eat the lot.” “Sure, sure…” Richter nodded.

“Now, onto my turn. I have quite the refined sense of humor so use your best cards please.” Tenebrae chortled. “Says the centurion who couldn’t even get any of his servants to join.” “Excuse me, unlike your lazy minions, my monsters are out doing their jobs and balancing the flow of mana.” “My precious monsters are just so good at their jobs that they can afford to take some time off instead of spending every waking moment working and trying to avoid me.” “I’m not picking your card.” “You won’t be able to tell which is mine, dope.” “We’ll see.” Tenebrae drew a card. “ _____. That’s how I want to die.” Richter - (with the intent of gambling a point, Richter put in two cards. Losing would mean losing a point, but winning would mean keeping the point and earning a new one and he only needed one more to pass Enki.) “Spontaneous human combustion” and “not wearing pants” Aqua - “Flesh eating bacteria”(definitely intended as a passive aggressive wish toward Tenebrae.) Pontus - “A Bop It™” Emil - “Poor life choices” Enki - “Expecting a burp and vomiting on the floor.” Sedona - “Laying an egg” “Somebody’s taking a risk this round. Are you that intent on beating me, Aqua?” “Not my bet. But I will laugh my tail off if you pick my card after all that blather.” “Fine.” Tenebrae harrumphed. “Poor life choices is definitely entertaining, but nothing quite does it for me like spontaneous human combustion.” “YESH! The bet paid off!” Richter took the card he’d won. “For Martel’s sake, Richter!” Emil gasped. “That was morbid!” “Couldn’t help it. If I can’t laugh about pasht experienchesh, what good is my life?” “You’re terrible. What was your other card? If you say flesh eating bacteria, I will punch you.” “Nah, nah, my other card wash ‘not wearing pantsh.’” “Oh thank god. You’ve got a decent sense of humor then. I would have picked that one.” “Thanksh.” “Alright. Last card of the last round.” Tenebrae announced. “You and I can break this little tie or Emil could tie it up with Pontus.” “I just hope anybody but you gets the point Teneboob.” “Same to you, wet blanket.” Tenebrae read the card for Enki. “What’s the most emo?” Emil - “A mopey zoo lion” and “flightless birds” Tenebrae - “Half-elves who aren’t good at math.” Pontus - “Alcoholism” and “Kids with ass cancer.” Aqua - “The Great Depression” Sedona - “Poorly-timed Blood Purge jokes” Richter - “A sad fat dragon with no friends.”

“Going all out, I see. Some of you really came to win.” Enki took a few moments of consideration before finally selecting “Half-elves who aren’t good at math.” “Haha! I have won!” Tenebrae cheered. “No! Enki! How could you betray me like this?!” Aqua sobbed. “Don’t blame Enki. It’s just that I’m obviously funnier!” “You got lucky! My cards were junk.” “Don’t blame your cards. You just couldn’t use them effectively.” “I hope I never have to play this with you again.” Aqua took a shot, scowling at the other centurion. “Do you even get tipshy?” Richter asked. “A little. We can get buzzed but we usually don’t. We absorb mana naturally so it’s kind of pointless for us to eat or drink. We can do it for pleasure, but there’s no real desire or urge for it. Unless you’re like me and want anything to smother the rage you feel.” “I shee.” Richter smirked. “What’sh the final shcore?” “Pontus beat me with 12. I could have tied if I hadn’t gambled, but instead I’m stuck in second with 11. Tenebrae managed third place with 9, Aqua has fourth with 6 points. You managed fifth place with 5 points. Enki has 4 and Sedona got 3.” “I shtill can’t believe you losht to a tadpole.” Richter chuckled. “I can’t believe Pontus lost his streak! He was doing so well!” Pontus burbled for a moment and Aqua translated. “He thinks you guys probably just got used to his type of humor and started picking more surprising options. Plus, he said his last few cards were pretty bad.” “Well, you cant win them all.” Richter hiccuped. “I’m jusht happy I managed to get myself out of a loshing shtreak. Maybe I’m funnier drunk?” “You were pretty damn funny sober!” Emil laughed. “At least, to me you were.”

#original #writing #my writing #hannikka

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gilmoremovies · 8 years ago

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Fiddler on the Roof (1971)

Date Watched: 18th November 2016

Referenced in: 1x15, 2x11, 3x03, 5x15 , 6x01, Spring and Summer

Rating: ★★★★★

I love this musical. I really want to see it live. The film is just perfect, the way it is set up that Tevye sometimes speaks to the camera/God and when it freezes for him to make a decision. And all the acting and singing and songs are just the best.

(Other GG Movies I’ve watched so far)

(Full references under the cut)

1x15, Christopher Returns (2001) Lorelai says, “That’s very ‘Fiddler on the Roof’ of you.” LORELAI: We can’t get married Christopher. We don’t know each other as adults. CHRISTOPHER: So let’s get married and get to know each other as adults. LORELAI: Well, that’s very Fiddler on the Roof of you.

2x11, Secrets and Loans (2002) Referenced by Rory when discussing with Sookie and Lorelai that Lorelai deserves a loan. SOOKIE: No, I mean it. I mean, you’re an upstanding citizen, you’re an active part of the community. RORY: Yeah, you made all of the donkey outfits for the Christmas festival last year. SOOKIE: You organized the Save the Historic Oak Tree campaign. RORY: And you played Tevye in the, uh, Stars Hollow Community Theater production of Fiddler on the Roof. LORELAI: Yes, well, five and a half stars from the Stars Hollow Gazette, unheard of 'til that time. SOOKIE: They should take that into account.

3x03, Application Anxiety (2002) Lorelai mentions “the butcher Lazar Wolf.” LORELAI: So what do we call this guy, alumnus Darren, you know, like you’d say farmer John or the butcher Lazar Wolf? RORY: Hish-kabibble.

5x15, Jews and Chinese Food (2005) Kirk plays Tevye in the Stars Hollow Elementary production of “Fiddler on the Roof.” LORELAI: And Patty and Babette are organizing Stars Hollow’s first botox party. RORY: Are you invited? LORELAI: Are you insinuating I should be? RORY: So the Hollow’s low on grapefruits. LORELAI: Uh-huh. And I’m doing costumes for the Stars Hollow Elementary School production of Fiddler on the Roof.

LULU: Luke. Luke! [She snaps her fingers] Eyes on me! Eyes on me. Thank you. Now, as you know, I teach third grade over at the elementary school. And our production of Fiddler on the Roof is on Saturday. And Bradley here is in charge of set design. Right, Bradley? [Bradley nods.] So, he just wanted to come here and tell you that he will need you at the school tomorrow at three o’clock. And please bring your own tools. Okay? You did that very well, Bradley! LUKE: What do you mean, he needs me at the school tomorrow? He needs me at the school to do what? LULU: To help build the sets. LUKE: I’m not going to help build any sets. LULU: But – LUKE: I have a diner to run. I don’t have time to build any sets. LULU: But Lorelai signed you up weeks ago. LUKE: She did? LULU: Yes, she did. She signed you up to build the sets and she signed herself up to make the costumes. LUKE: Oh, I must have forgot about that.

SOOKIE: I guess. Ooo, what’s in the bag? [Lorelai opens the bag and displays its contents.] And that is – LORELAI: A bag of Santa beards. SOOKIE: Naturally. LORELAI: I need twenty-five dark beards for Fiddler on the Roof. I drove to four different towns and six different costume shops and this is all I could find. Apparently Lieberman’s the only Jew in Connecticut. [Sookie giggles] Hey, can I borrow some tea? SOOKIE: Why? LORELAI: I thought I’d use it to dye them. SOOKIE: Oh, very clever. Up on the shelf. LORELAI: Thanks. SOOKIE: So, other than the great beard search, how was your morning? LORELAI: Fine.

LUKE: So, where do we get started, men? BRADLEY: First we have to build Tevye’s house. LUKE: Okay, we can do that. BRADLEY: There’s plans for the house over here.

KIRK: Hey, Luke. You’re helping out here? LUKE: Oh, yeah. Sets. How about you? KIRK: I’m playing Tevye. LUKE: You’re – CARRIE: Come on, kids. Chop, chop. KIRK: Excuse me, my director’s calling.

LULU: Tevye is a very demanding role. LUKE: But – LULU: We looked and looked. We even opened up auditions to the scary extension school kids, but nothing. And you know, we had a terrible experience last year when we did Jesus Christ Superstar. LUKE: Oh, yeah. LULU: Jesus was allergic to peanuts and stuffed one up his nose and broke out in terrible hives during intermission. The second act was all Judas and Pontius Pilate – pure disaster. We had to refund money, it was a nightmare. So this year, we went with a ringer. [She looks lovingly at Kirk, who has started rehearsing.] KIRK: A fiddler on the roof? Sounds crazy, no? LUKE: Oh, boy, does it.

KIRK: Well, this dairy cart you made me – LUKE: What’s wrong with it? KIRK [lifting the handles]: It pulls too easily and the wheel doesn’t wobble. LUKE: So what? KIRK: Well, it’s too good. You built me a twenty-first century dairy cart. LUKE: There’s no such thing as a twenty-first century dairy cart. KIRK: Exactly. Look, Tevye’s a poor man. You’ve heard the song. LUKE: Yes, I’ve heard the song, Kirk. KIRK: Okay, so he’s poor. He’s tired. He’s suffering, and his horse is lame. His life is hard, so pulling this cart should be hard. LUKE: You’re an actor. Pretend it’s hard. KIRK: I’m not that kind of actor. For my type of work, it has to be legitimately hard. [Luke kicks the cart and breaks the wheel.]

KIRK: Because of our traditions, we’ve kept our balance for many, many years. Here, in Anatevka, we have traditions for everything. How to eat, how to sleep, how to wear clothes. For instance, we always keep our heads covered, and always wear a little prayer shawl. This shows our constant devotion to God. You may ask, how did this tradition start? I’ll tell you. I don’t know. But it’s a tradition. [The kids start dancing onto the stage.] KIRK: Because of our traditions, everyone knows who he is and what God expects him to do. [They start singing.] EVERYONE: Who, day and night, must scramble for a living? Feed his wife and children? Say his daily prayers? And who has the right, as master of the house, to have the final word at home. The papa, the papa! Tradition! The papa, the papa! Tradition! [They start dancing around again. A girl stumbles a little.] LUKE [rushing onto the stage]: Hey, she tripped! Yente tripped!

LUKE: Hey. LORELAI: Hey. Luke, what are you – LUKE: Yente tripped! LORELAI: What? LUKE: She tripped, just as she was heading out to tell Avram about Ruchel. LORELAI: The shoemaker’s daughter? LUKE: Yeah, she’s trying to fix him up with Avram’s son. LORELAI: She’s almost blind, she can hardly see. LUKE: Hey, I am not doing a bit with you here. The kid tripped, because her dress was too long! LORELAI: Okay, is she hurt? LUKE: Of course she’s not hurt, but she completely blew her entrance. All the people of Anatevka are standing around with their goats, she tripped and they have to reset the goats! LORELAI: Luke – LUKE: And if you were there where you were supposed to be, her costume would’ve fit, and Yente wouldn’t have tripped. LORELAI [getting mad]: What do you mean, where I was supposed to be? LUKE: You’re making the costumes. At least that’s the rumour. I’m making the sets, and I’m there. LORELAI: Yeah. I am making the costumes. I’m making the costumes here and then I’m bringing them there when they are done. LUKE: Oh, sure. A likely story.

[PLAY] BOY: Tevye. I suppose you know why I’ve come to see you. KIRK: Yes, I do, Rabbi Lazar, but there’s no use talking about it. BOY: Why not? KIRK: Why yes? Why should I get rid of her? BOY: Well, you have a few more without her. KIRK: I see. Today you want one, tomorrow you may want two. KIRK: Why is it so important to you? BOY: Frankly, because I’m lonesome. KIRK: Lonesome? What are you talking about? BOY: You don’t know? KIRK: We’re talking about my new cow! The one you want to buy from me. BOY: A milk cow? So I won’t get lonesome? [laughs] KIRK: What’s so funny? BOY: I was talking about your daughter.

[The play is still going on. Kirk is onstage with his “wife”. They are singing.] KIRK: Do you love me? GOLDE: Do I what? KIRK: Do you love me? GOLDE: Do I love you? With our daughters getting married, and the trouble in the town, you’re upset, you’re worn out, go inside, go lie down! Maybe it’s indigestion. KIRK: Golde, I’m asking you a question. [Backstage, Luke is putting the finishing touches on a cart. Lorelai has just finished repairing a costume.] LUKE [to kid]: Okay, go. [They both take a moment to watch the duet.] KIRK: Do you love me? GOLDE: I’m your wife! KIRK: I know! But do you love me? GOLDE: Do I love him? For twenty-five years I’ve lived with him, fought with him, starved with him. Twenty-five years my bed is his. If that’s not love, what is? [Backstage, Lorelai looks close to tears. She nearly glances at Luke.] KIRK: Then you love me? GOLDE: I suppose I do. KIRK: And I suppose I love you too. KIRK and GOLDE: It doesn’t change a thing, but even so, after twenty-five years, it’s nice to know.

6x01, New and Improved Lorelai (2005) Lorelai says, “Wonder of wonders and miracle of miracles, right?” TAYLOR: Well what do you know! I thought there was a better chance of all four of the Beatles getting back together than you two ever coming down enough to get engaged. LORELAI: Oh well…Wonder of wonder, Miracle of miracles. Right?

A Year in the Life: Spring (2016) Logan makes a reference to Fiddler when listening to a conversation between Rory and Naomi Shropshire on the phone. RORY: It was a rabbit NAOMI: It was a mouse RORY: It was a rabbit LOGAN: It’s the Gentile version of 'Fiddler on the Roof. RORY: Ok, you’re right, it was a mouse

A Year in the Life: Summer (2016) Babette references Fiddler when giving praise to The Stars Hollow Musical DONALD: The book was terrific too. BABETTE: Tevye, move over. There’s a new Jew in town.

#fiddler on the roof #fiddler #r1 #r1x15 #r2 #r2x11 #r3 #r3x03 #r5 #r5x15 #r6 #r6x01 #rAYITL #rSpring #rSummer #gg movie list

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81scorp · 5 years ago

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More thoughts on Frozen

(Originally posted as an editorial on Deviantart Apr 18 2015. It has not been changed from how I originally wrote it.)

A while ago I wrote an editorial that I think summed up my thoughts about Frozen nicely and I didn`t think it was necessary to go back and write any more things about it. But then I read some comments and other deviants`s editorials on Frozen that I felt had a point. This lead to some new thoughts, and some old that I had forgotten, popping up in my head. So I figured I`d get these thoughts out as well. Hopefully I wont have to revisit this topic again in the future, but I can`t guarantee anything. SPOILERS never bothered me anyway The good the bad and the subjective A word that I used often in my previous editorial was "like" and words that I tried to use as little as possible was "good" or "bad". If I say that something is good you will have an image in your head of what you think good is and it is likely that it will be different from my defenition of it. Just because something is good it doesn`t mean that everyone likes it and just because you like something it doesn`t mean that it is objectively good, the only thing that you can know for certain is if you like the thing in question or not. Take this for example: I like James Cameron`s Avatar. Hey! Wait! Where are you going? Come back! Anyway. The feeling I remember having when watching Avatar in the cinema (IN 3-D!!) was positive. After a while, people started to point out the movie`s flaws and at closer inspection I realized that they were right. But I can`t deny what I felt when I first saw it, and after repeated viewings, even being aware of it`s flaws, I still like it. Is the story old, borrowed, unoriginal, a bit predictable, going more for emotion than logic and is "Unobtainium" a terribly lazy name for a macguffin? Yes. (Hell, even the first time I watched it I thought it was a stupid name. Here are a few of my own suggestions: Makinium [based on "macguffin"], Onatnium, [based on "unobtainable"] and Xanatnium [based on "Xeno"]). But hey, it has great visuals, and... well... the visuals are nice. That is something that both sides agree on when it comes to Avatar: Weak story, great visuals. Is it great? No. Good? Kinda. Likeable? For some people yes. Did I like it? Yes. Movie Critic Roger Ebert has said that what is worse than a bad movie is a movie that`s bad and boring (those were not his exact words but it is pretty much the gist of it). And to me Avatar was at least entertaining. I think that Frozen works better than Avatar. The tone in Frozen is different so it`s more acceptable for it to rely on emotional stuff than Avatar, a movie that shows a world with a tone closer to our own with more (what is mostly considered to be) mature elements like death, war, blood and getting jiggy with blue cat-aliens. At closer inspection I have to admit that the story of Frozen has a few holes of its own, I will get to them later. So, with that said: I like Frozen. Though not as much as I like Tangled. Conceal don`t feel If you have seen HiSHE`s Frozen video you might remember this and wonder "Good point. Why didn`t her parents teach her to not fear her powers instead of bottling it all up inside?" Well, it must be hard to teach someone to not be afraid of something if you, the teacher, are afraid of it. It`s hard to learn to not be afraid of a big spider if you notice that your cognitive behavioral therapist is also afraid of it. And no, I don`t mean that they were afraid of Elsa, but, if not her powers per se, then at least the potential for harm that her powers had. "Conceal don`t feel" was, I admit, not a good idea but hopefully it was only gonna be temporary till they could come up with someting better. I would also like to point out that it was the trolls themselves that told the parents and Elsa that Elsa should hide her powers, so it`s not all the parents`s fault. But, yes, I agree, they could have handled this better. Characters VS story I remember watching an episode of Sibling Rivalry on Channel Awesome where Doug and Rob Walker talked about the new Cinderella movie and at one point compaired it to the old, animated version. They said that even if the animated one had a very dated portrayal of women they (Doug and Rob) were at least emotionally invested in the characters. They felt bad for Cinderella when the stepsisters tore apart her dress but not so much when it happened in the live action version. That is probably the reason for this movie`s popularity. The story, while trying something new at some places (like sister saving sister), has a few flaws (like the earlier mentioned "conceal don`t feel"). But part of the appeal is the characters. We have the optimistic and determined Anna, who`s not gonna let a snowstorm stop her from talking to her sister. Kristoff, an antisocial loner who later turns out to be very reliable and a loyal friend. The innocent, dimwitted, kind and wellmeaning Olaf, and Elsa, sophisticated, calm and reserved but deep down, a tragic, hurting woobie. Then there`s Hans. And no, I`m not saying that he`s likeable like the other characters, but you can like him for being an interesting bad guy, kinda like how people like the Joker. He is (for Disney at least) a new, subtle kind of bad guy who`s really good at what he`s doing. I`m not saying that it`s A OK to have characters work as a crutch for the story (like the CGI did in the Star Wars prequels) because it`s not. But with this blueprint of how the chararacters behave, we fans can take them and make our own, more complex stories where we explore and take these characters in different directions while still being true to their core. Good characters in a story with a few flaws are still good characters. The Actual flaws

NOT the actual flaws In my previous editorial I wrote why I didn´t think Frozen was "Teh Greatest Disneymovie Evar". I feel that my arguments to why I felt the way I did were lazily written so I decided to revisit and elaborate them more here. What I wrote was more a criticism of the hype than the movie itself. This is not a change of opinion, like I said: I like Frozen. These are just my old thoughts better explained. The things that seem new but have been done before, both by Disney and other animation studios: girl doesn´t need to end up with a man: Mulan. "You can`t marry a guy you just met!": Enchanted."But Enchanted isn`t Disney animated canon." you say. True, but it has fairytale-ish elements and a female lead, is a musical and is at least partly animated. This, plus being made under Disney`s roof, technically makes it a Disney movie that can be compaired to Frozen. (Heck, there was even talk about making Giselle a Disney princess, the reason it didn`t happen was because Disney didn`t want to pay royalties to Amy Adams for using her likeness.) However: Enchanted was more of an open subversion (You could tell from the trailer that they were gonna take some liberties with the Disney formula.) while Frozen was an animated Disney movie played straight... with subversions. And unlike Mulan it is the deuteragonist that stays single instead of the protagonist. But I digress. Is my definition of a Disney movie a little broad? Maybe, but still, it bugs me a little when I hear "This is the first time that a Disney movie has the message that you can`t fall in love with a guy you`ve just met." when Enchanted is not exactly an obscure movie. So, Frozen was not the first Disney movie with these two twists but does that make it less good? No. Toy Story was not first with the "Toys coming to life when you`re not looking" thing (The Christmas Toy came out 1986) but it was still a great movie. (And Frozen didn`t borrow a basic idea, at least not from these two movies, just a few tropes. The basic idea was borrowed from Wicked.) What makes Frozen good is not that it uses these two twists, but that it is (to my knowledge) the first movie in the Disney animated canon to use them and a couple of other new twists to the classic Disney formula in one and the same film. Using the old classical Disney tropes: Why did I bring this up? Tangled is just as guilty of using them and not all the tropes in the Disney formula are inherently bad and can be good if used correctly. And technically it didn`t make the movie worse.The parents dying. Formulaic? Sure, but at least it helped move the plot forward. Coming back to life thanks to the power of love. Done before, yes, but this time it was done with sibling love for a change and not the big romantic love that we`ve seen so many times before. And like Tangled, where it is established that Rapunzel has healing powers, it makes sense that Elsa, with her ice powers, was the one to save Anna from her icy fate. So why did I bring this up? When I kept hearing "It`s so different from other Disney movies", it made me think that it was gonna be more different than it actually was. With that expectation I held it to a different standard and it made the old Disney tropes stick out even more for me everytime I saw them. Sometimes I wish I could`ve gone into the movie a little bit more blind.

The ACTUAL flaws So while Frozen undeniably does use some of the old Disney tropes they are not really the actual flaws. And yes, it`s not all because of me having high expectations, Frozen DOES have a few actual flaws and they lie in the narrative flow. The backstory is a little rushed and not well thought out. Most of the songs are used up in the first act leaving us with only three in the second act, and only one of those three songs helps move the plot forward (The reprise of "For the first time in forever") the two others are just musical deadweight. Elsa and Anna`s relationship is the most interesting part of the movie but more screentime is spent on Anna`s relationship with Kristoff who, while still likable, is not as interesting as Elsa. The sequel So... they`re making a sequel to Frozen. My feelings? Cautious optimism. It may not be as successful in the box office as the first. Sure, people are still gonna see it because it`s frickin Frozen (kinda like with Phantom Menace), but it still may not be as successful, and it may not be as good as the first one either (quality doesn`t necessarily follow popularity after all), even if the team that made the first one is involved in it. The keyword here is may. It could be good. Does Frozen have material for a sequel? Well, the original fairytale had a woman of royalty who represented cold, winter and ice and was an important part of the story. Frozen, even if it has been changed a bit, still have those elements, so, yeah it could work. Unlike Tangled which was based on the fairytale "Rapunzel" where the plot is built on a woman with insanely long hair. Because of how well it did in the box office there were thoughts of a sequel, but when the writers and directors got together to develop one they realized: "She cut her hair... it`s over." When Lasseter started to work on Disney animation, things were changed so it is the filmmakers who decide wether they are ready to make a sequel, not marketing or merchandizing. And I like that decision, only continue the story if there is a story to tell. So what more kind of stories can you tell with Frozen? Maybe the origin of Elsa`s powers? Maybe she`s adopted? Personally I don`t need an explanation for it. The supernatural stuff that happened in old Twilight Zone episodes sometimes just happened because the universe liked to screw with people. Or you can do some kind of "mutant thing", I mean, Disney and Marvel after all. But I like the adoption angle now that I think about it. Elsa`s search to find out more about her past can lead to a journey with adventures. It can also have the message that family isn`t just the people you`re biologically related to. This still doesn`t change my views on ElsAnna shipping though. (Unless of course it`s platonic.) Should Elsa be paired up with someone in the sequel? No, I don`t think so. Like I said in my earlier editorial: by having two heroines Disney could have it`s cake and eat it too. If one of the girls is a princess who ends up with a romantic, opposite sex love interest in the end, there`s no reason why the other can`t be a queen and single (...and possibly [but not necessarily] a lesbian). I just hope that, when it is nominated at a future academy award, the jury members take their job seriously and actually look at it and the other nominees before they give the Oscar to Frozen 2 simply because it`s Disney. Speaking of more Frozen movies: My thoughts on Frozen fever? It sounds cute. Like the kind of small project you`d do between bigger projects. I haven`t actually seen it. To do that I´d have to go and see that live-action Cinderella movie, and I don`t feel like it. Small constructive critcism Like I mentioned earlier it has a few flaws. It`s a bit of a fixer upper. Conceal don`t feel/ Elsa`s childhood In a way I defended this earlier (mostly because I couldn`t come up with a better idea myself) but I think I have an idea now on how it could have been done differently. The whole "Conceal don`t feel" could be something that Elsa herself came up with in her grown up years. Her parents could try to teach her to use it responsibly instead of bottling it all up. In the scene where Elsa is given her gloves they could first be lying on a book. Elsa`s fathers hands picks them up and we see that the book the gloves were lying on is called "The magic feather" (a subtle reference to Dumbo, hinting that the gloves are just placebos). and then later in "Do you want to build a snowman": The King is looking out through a window, rubbing his hand as if it is hurt, worrying about Elsa. The Queen is looking through a book and reacts as if she`s found the answer. She shows the book to the king. Both of them have expressions of joy in their faces. (she found the solution to Elsa`s problem in an ancient text in the book, which leads to them going away on a travel to find it which leads to their ship capsizing in the storm). Later in the movie, before she wakes up in her cell in Arendelle, Elsa could have a flashback to a day where she was 12-years old. Her father is touching the palm of her hand with his own as a form of trust exercise. Ice starts forming on his hand. He keeps holding on as a way to say: "It`s just ice, there`s nothing wrong with your gift, it`s not evil." Elsa allows herself to smile. Then she has a moment of doubt, her ice gets colder, it`s hurting her father but he refuses to let go and says in a calm voice:"It`s OK Elsa, don`t be afraid. You can control it". But the cold becomes too strong and he pulls back his hand in pain. The Queen wants to comfort Elsa but Elsa is afraid and distances herself from her, fearing that she`ll hurt her. Still wanting to comfort her daughter the Queen tells Elsa: "It`s not your fault." But Elsa is too afraid, too afraid of her own powers and backs into the shadows (figuratively AND literally). Their parents dying may be sad but seeing them trying their hardest to help her before they die would be even sadder. It`s the Joss Whedon method: make us emotionally invested in the characters before they`re killed off. On the fence: The yoiking Here`s another thing mentioned in the HiSHE video. "This style of music doesn`t fit anywhere else in the movie." That kind of music is called Yoiking and is common in the Sami culture. Sami people live in the most northern part of Sweden, Norway and Finland, and since the movie takes place in an scandinavian-ish country I can see what the film makers were thinking. However, I saw much more 19th century western-european scandinavian style and culture than Sami culture. And you only hear the yoik two times: opening credits and end credits. Lion King had at least one african choir song in the movie itself (when Simba is running back to his homeland for example). They could have shown more Sami culture and/or have at least one yoiking song within the movie itself. (Like when Kristoff is riding on Sven back to Arendelle with a sick Anna in his arms there could be some dramatic, ominous yoiking.) Sami culture is not completely absent from this movie though. Kristoff shows signs of it by being a man who spends a lot of time in out in the nature with his trusty reindeer. Not much but it`s more than nothing. On the fence: Lack of music in the last part Fellow deviant Rabbette pointed out that there was no more musical numbers in the last quarter of the movie. Aladdin ended with a short reprise of "A whole new world", Beauty and the beast ended with a short reprise of "Beauty and the beast", so it could have been nice if this movie ended with Elsa and Anna singing a short reprise of "For the first time in forever" as they are ice skating around together. Just sayin`. Fan art In my previous editorial I wrote: "I like it, I`m just not onboard the hype-train" It means that I don`t think it`s "The greatest Disney movie EVAR!" It doesn`t mean that I`m not gonna do fan art of it. Because like I said: I like the characters, and I see opportunities for some fan spoofs that are too good to pass up. Most of them involve chocolate.

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