#//THANK YOU ALL YOU BEAUTIFUL NERDS

[lililovesthings]

Can't cope with the details...

Just small observation with this scene.

Aziraphale brings his hand down - drawing power from heaven (Up) Crowley brings his hand up - drawing power from hell (Down) AND it's like they balance and meet in the middle. Not really sure what to do with this but this is what happens when fanbys make fan shows for fan people....

[dnpslut]

anyways just arrived home after seattle tit and it was the best night of my life

[markscherz]

Nothing about this ridiculous post makes me laugh as hard as the fact that, in the midst of my soliloquising about being a total ass and the magic of tumblr and community and how a Janeway gif is almost always the right choice, I somehow inadvertently caused a not insignificant number of people to realise that tumblr changed how many tags are searchable.

thank you scherz et al. for bringing us the frogs Mini ature, Mini mum and of course, the Mini scule

[lilacgaby]

katsuki was red-faced and drunk as hell.

he could barely keep himself up straight, leaning against the wall of the curb that he sat on as midoriya waved to you. "thanks for coming, he wouldn't stop asking for you."

"don't talk about me like that.. damn nerd." katsuki slurred, pointing a threatening finger. in the wrong direction. midoriya laughed quietly, signaling goodbye to you as he took his leave.

"kat," you started, smiling at the pink flush of his cheeks, trying to place a coddling hand on his face but were stopped by him smacking your hand away. "what was that for?!"

"don't touch me! 'got my girl at home." he glared at you from the side, then shut his eyes and turned his face away with a small 'hmmph.'

you laughed, crossing your arms as you decided to play along. "really? but aren't i prettier?" he scoffed, red eyes not even bothering to look at you as he quipped, "fuck no. 's not even a competition. you'll be embarrassed you even-," he hiccuped, "said that shit when she gets here."

you gasp in mock offense, leaning down with a hand over your chest. "that's so rude! are you sure you don't wanna take a closer look?"

"get out of my--" his glazed eyes opened to glare at you once again, but his words got stuck in his throat as he looked you over. your streetlit features took a second to register in his mind, before a small, closed eye smile came over his face. "hey.. babe you got here." he said lowly after a moment. he grabbed one of your hands and held it up to his face, "missed 'ya. some fuckin' idiot was here earlier. so annoying."

"oh yeah? what'd they say?"

"i don't even remember." he started to fall asleep, but you hurriedly helped him up to the car first. he started sleepily muttering things to you as you buckled him in. "y'know you're the damn prettiest.. and the sweetest thing i've known.."

compared to how he was normally, he just wouldn't stop talking. not like you minded though, it was really feeding your ego to have him call you things like the most beautiful girl in the world.

as you helped him to bed, helping him change out of the clothes he'd wore in the bar first, you were cut off by him pulling you into bed beside him, caging you in his arms as he put his head on top of yours.

"stay." is all he said before he knocked out. but you did stay, not like you could've ran away from the tightened arms around you anyways.

tags. @k0z3me @darhinadadragon @maddietries @exoticrasin @lavendarstarz @hisonlyobsession @i-the-fluffo @cookielovesbook-akie @frosted-flakes @irenne-stans

[phantomsies]

𝖓𝖊𝖝𝖙 𝖈𝖔𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖓𝖙 • 𝖆.𝖆𝖗𝖙𝖑𝖊𝖗𝖙

your biggest fan soon becomes your biggest obsession….

black onlyfans creator!reader (fem descriptions), nerdy!armin, public sex/public masturbation, squirting, mentions of toys, exhibitionism, throatfucking, cumshot

📝: I wanted to go a completely different direction with this but a) it’s no longer kinktober and it would’ve much better suited that and b) nerd!armin just scratches an itch in my brain I can’t quite put my finger on. So enjoy! 🫶🏾 (also, I AM SO SORRY THIS SHIT IS SO LONG 😭😭 I don’t intend on headcanons being this length but I can’t shut the fuck up.)

═✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°╞══✿═══✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°╞══✿══

nerd!armin had been a dutiful subscriber of (y/n) (l/n)’s or as the world knew you, (performer name) for quite some time. He’d faithfully watched your content, never missing an upload to your sites and shamelessly scrolling your Twitter.

nerd!armin preferred your videos over others because they were so unique. Always willing to push the envelope by shooting in unconventional spaces; your car, public bathrooms and even dressing rooms..a polar opposite to his shy, bashful nature. In a way, he was jealous but also aroused..

from your long acrylics, fluffy lashes, colorful hair that changed from video to video and of course, the beautiful, dark brown complexion that radiated underneath the sun or ring lights, nerd!armin was obsessed.

nerd!armin would lie in bed after a long study session, classes or even a hard day at work..mindlessly stroking his cock in one hand as he held his phone in the other, eyes glued to the screen whilst you performed those lewd acts.

shoving those dildos in and out of your tight cunt, those pretty pink walls and plump brown lips sucking on that silicone toy..stretching yourself open all for his pleasure. A jeweled butt plug shoved into your ass and cream oozing down onto that gorgeous skin and the leather of your seats as you worked yourself into countless orgasms..mewling and begging for the would be viewer to keep fucking you..

“Fuck, I’m about to come, daddy..you’re gonna make me squirt.” Crying out as nerd!armin jerked himself even faster..subconsciously responding back without a single other person being in the room. ”Squirt for me, baby. Come..” Whimpering before exploding with a load of his own..

despite only being an intern, nerd!armin was well off from his freelancing tech work and although it didn’t leave him much room for socializing, he would tip you amicably on all the new content, as well as leave kind, respectful, encouraging words. It wasn’t something you saw often in this field.

it also didn’t take nerd!armin long to realize that you never featured a partner in any of your content like some girls eventually did. Only the various assortment of toys gifted to you by supporters. Which only further fed his delusions when you made a mess and glared into the camera, batting those doe brown eyes before saying “..look at what you made me do..that big dick feels so good..”

nerd!armin, who had only been with one woman sexually in his entire life and didn’t date often, could only dream of being with a girl like you.

so it came as no surprise when you announced that you would be opening a contest to film with one of your subscribers for the first time, nerd!armin leaped at the chance! The thought of getting to fuck the woman he’d hopelessly fawned over excited him.

nerd!armin nearly fainted when he got a DM on OnlyFans one day to see that he had won, asking when he’d like to arrange the meetup.

nerd!armin was understandably nervous on the day you two came face to face..but felt as ease when you continuously reassured him and even made sure that both of you had been tested, as well as protection.

“You’re so cute..it’s nice to finally meet you. Thank you for supporting me..” your gentle voice sent a shockwave of butterflies soaring through nerd!armin’s stomach as you wrapped him in a tight hug…and of course, a tightening in his pants upon laying eyes on his favorite creator. But that was merely the beginning.

nerd!armin found himself blushing when you slowly traced circles all over his skin, examining the single tattoo on his forearm and complimenting the smell of his cologne as the two of you sat alone in the bedroom of the designated filming space of your spacious home. Impressed by the bookshelves full of old literature he passed on the way in.

“Mmmm..you’re nervous, aren’t you?” “…I guess you could say that.” “Well don’t be, I’m going to make sure we have a good time, I promise..”

nerd!armin had no idea just how true you were to your word when less than ten minutes after the camera came on, you were on your knees, tongue extended and a wide smile on your face as he towered over you.

nerd!armin could hardly contain himself when eventually, those glossy brims were now encompassed around his cock. Slurping noises emanating around the room, along with his adorable cries…sloppy drool and gag spit spilling from that wet mouth and onto the pulsating head, shaft and those swollen balls. Disregarding the fact that your pretty face had become a disheveled mess.

“Oh my God…that feels so good, beautiful. Your mouth feels fucking amazing..” “You wanna come for me, baby?” “..yes! Drain me, please..” pathetically pleading whilst relentlessly fucking your throat.

nerd!armin unabashedly spent days, practicing his stroke on a translucent flesh light, feeding it deep thrusts and stuffing it with an ungodly amount of cum, examining your videos like study material..in hopes of gaining some stamina against you.

but nothing could prepare nerd!armin for the sheer sensation that being inside of you brought upon him.. however, he wasn’t the only one caught off guard..especially when he’d gently tug your head down and force you to watch as he glided into that narrow hole.. a move he’d learn from his tapes.

“It’s so big..damn..” “I told you..” giggling to yourselves as your gazes met and he’d begin to move.

nerd!armin almost felt compelled to believe that you were faking your moans like other pornstars so often did…but that misconception was cleared up when your eyes began to trail back, legs began to tremble and a slight bulge formed at the very bottom of your stomach.

“Yes, you stretching the fuck out of this pussy, baby..right there!..” “Am-am I doing a good job?” “You fucking me so good, please don’t stop.”

nerd!armin nearly lost all composure when you all but pushed him away, only to shower him in a stream of your juices. Only increasing as he tapped that swollen tip against your quivering folds.

nerd!armin didn’t last more than five minutes after that powerful climax and began dry heaving as his own neared. Ushering you back to your knees to paint those pretty features and tits with his load.

nerd!armin was convinced that once the cameras shut off, you’d put him out for nutting too quickly. Surely a woman of your caliber would never deal with that again. But yet again, he was proven wrong when you smiled up at him, flicking your tongue across your lips before posing a question. “So..where should we should film next time? We gotta do this more often..”

nerd!armin had found himself the newest and sole object of (creator’s name) affection!

[cheonstapes]

miguel o’hara stars in… ‘THE SWEETER THE JUICE’ o(^-^)o

･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡. miguel o’hara x reader .｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･

SMUT

now he’s finally got you pregnant, he’s gonna do what he’s been dreaming of all these years. suck. those. tits.

same universe as this miguel.

cw; lactation kink, pregnancy, breeding kink (not really but yknow me), dry humping, titties, older nerd!miguel, they’re finally married!

800+ words

@cheonstapes : she’s back! again!

if miguel had to pick a part of your body he loved the most, it’d definitely be your tits.

if you think he was obsessed before — you don’t wanna know what goes through his head as he watches you waddle around his house, carrying his kid, sighing every time you leak through another shirt. you had forgone a bra ever since you got pregnant, saying how uncomfortable they feel against your chest — not that he was complaining.

“for fucks-sake, again?”

he was so used to hearing you say that, he already had a shirt on hand for you to change into. you were so grateful for your doting husband that you completely missed that nasty glint in his eyes you usually only see when he’s bending you over the bed and fucking you raw — luckily for him.

“here, honey. lift your arms for me.”

as you do, he pulls the shirt up — the soiled fabric catching under your swollen breasts as he wiggles it off you. “ah, shit — thanks, baby. but fuck, am i’m so tired of changing shirts every 10 minutes!” you might be tired, but miguel cannot get enough of it. he was already so fucking hard, practically salivating at the sight of your bare breasts still leaking down your heavy belly.

“maybe you should just ditch the shirts all together, love — you know i hate seeing my beautiful wife uncomfortable.” miguel’s voice was a soft whisper in your ear, lips slowly tracing down the side of your jaw to your sensitive neck — kissing the skin so tenderly. his calloused hands gently massaged the taut flesh of your tits, probing and squeezing at your nipples to let out small trickles of that sweet milk.

“migs, how many times are you gonna say that?”

“as many as it takes for you to finally listen.”

the breathy laugh you let out did little to qualm the feeling deep in his gut — he was dead serious, there was absolutely no reason for you to be in shirts all the time when you have him to take care of you whenever you needed a good milking. his hips were already sinking into to the plush of your ass that he loved oh-so-much — especially with how much fatter it got during your pregnancy.

it was almost as if he had lost control of his body, a hand landing on your waist to bend you over the counter as he mindlessly ruts into you. “dios, nena, eres tan hermosa. vas a ser la mamá más guapa, ¿verdad? mm, my pretty, little mama.” miguel never failed to turn you on to no bounds, like, you have a walking greek god as a husband — but those fucking hormones were making it unbearable.

the force at which he was pushing against you had shifted your drenched panties to the side, leaving practically nothing between you and his drooling bulge. his fingers tightened around the fat of your hips, squeezing the flesh delicious hard as his free hand flipped you over — pushing your back against the edge of the counter. “shit…been waiting to taste these all fucking day, honey.”

mindful of your growing belly, he hiked one of your legs up on his hip — craning his neck down to suck on a pert nipple. wasting no time, and at a much better angle, he continued to grind against you — his tip catching against your engorged clit. “m—migs, baby, fuck…” the way he swirled and sucked so eagerly reminded you of when you first started dating, how determined he was to knock you up before the two of you even moved in together.

the taste was so addicting, some of your milk trickling down his body — dripping onto the ground beneath you. you knew he was about to cum, hard — his eyes had rolled back, breathing in heavy pants, hands rushing to pull down the waistband of his sweats. “gonna paint my girls in my cum, love — sé una buena chica y mantenlos juntos para mí.”

“‘course, baby.” you nodded breathlessly, squishing the globes of fat together as he pumped his cock dry — head thrown back as ropes upon ropes of his hot seed coated your tits, sliding into the self-made crevice. “god, what did i do in my past life to have a wife as sexy as you, mamí?” his spent cock bobbed against his thigh as he trapped you against the counter — kissing you deeply as his wet hands reaching up to rub the cum into the skin of your breasts.

“mmph — y’know, i heard cum’s good for the skin. it, uh, helps with the blood circulation in your tits — i think we should do this more often, love.”

“migs, if you weren’t, like — a whole scientist, i might’ve believed you. if you want a titjob, just say that.”

“…i mean, you said it — not me.”

all your home shirts were promptly locked away and never to be seen again.

-new year, new waiting for cheon to get her shit together andpost!

[6okuto]

stop an angel from losing its wings

akaashi x gn!reader | fluff. Not that serious. about men cutting their hair

“do you think my hair’s getting too long?”

the knife in your hand stills halfway through a peach for your boyfriend.

keiji watches you, innocently, fiddling with the dark strands falling across his brow as your head snaps up, eyes locking onto the same bangs framing his face. “keiji akaashi, don’t you dare.”

“...what?”

“please, so help me god, if you cut your hair short i will cry.”

there’s a familiar click as the kettle turns itself off, hot water meant for his tea bubbling against glass.

“pft—”

“don’t laugh!”

“i’m not—” his chuckle is barely muffled by the hand over his mouth, and you gape.

the last time he cut his hair was maybe six months ago, and you’ve watched it slowly but surely reach a perfect length.

it lets you make little horns when you shampoo his hair as he holds you against him,

it looks stupidly good when he combs it back for special occasions,

it falls in his face just enough that it’s brought you the gift of keiji with his blue light glasses, cat slippers, and a little sprout ponytail on top of his head, tied with a little fruit hair tie, as he works away late into the night.

and he’s allowed to cut it. he is, but at the same time—

“this is serious! keiji, please- i’ll get on my knees and beg, look, please.” 

the apartment isn’t big; your spot in the kitchen is just a few meters away. it takes all but three seconds to leave the fruit you’ve cut for him and jog over with your arms wide open.

keiji holds his out to stop you. “what? no—”

“please, please, please, please, please,”—you dodge and slide to the floor, wrapping your arms around his legs—“please, my angel, my beautiful boyfriend, love of my life who i love so much, please—”

“i’m—” he snorts while you laugh between desperate pleas, muffled against the cotton of his pajamas, “i didn’t want to cut it, i was just wondering.”

and you sigh, loosen the grip around his pajamas, now slightly wrinkled. “oh thank god.”

keiji snickers and moves his hand to rest on your head. it travels down to hold your jaw, tilting your face to look at his. “is cutting my hair really that awful of an idea?”

you lean into his touch. “i mean, no, you look good no matter what. but they’re not joking when they say every time a boy with perfect hair cuts it too short an angel dies.”

he hums, his thumb rubbing against your cheek. “so are you the angel in this case?”

“am—” you almost parrot the question, caught in place by the amusement on his face. “shut up.”

“because if you’re the angel then i definitely can’t cut my hair.”

“oh my god.” the hair in question falls in front of his eyes again, and you take the opportunity to stand up while he fixes it. “whatever, i’m leaving, you nerd. go back to editing or whatever it is you do,” you huff with a smile and pinch to his cheek.

his soft laughter fills the room while you move to let him work, (swearing when you remember his tea you promised to make,)

but your leg is caught by one of his, and a hand is suddenly holding yours against his face.

keiji shoots you a smug smile, keeps you near just a little longer, just so he can say one more thing—

“okay, angel.”

forgot i wrote this months ago. hey

🏷️| @pelicanpizza @godoffuckedupcats @causenessus @priv-rose @ur-local-simp @xaaavi @respitable @hasti-666 @deepenthevoid

[konigsblog]

Nerd!König, but he demands compensation for his helpfulness and generosity after studying alongside you. He won't ask for anything until he's finished writing an entire essay for you, where he then hints at being jerked off for his patience towards you. I mean, without him, you would've failed, Liebling. Don't you think König deserves a little something after all that typing and effort? You don't even have to touch him, just allow the poor intelligent virgin to grope your body and palm himself gently and slowly, getting off to the feeling of a woman's body for the first time. Your soft skin is admirable and mesmerising, leaving him with a hefty, growing, and aching bulge that throbs and pulsates beneath your bodyweight.

Or instead, lay there against your knees between his muscular thighs, maintaining deep and intimate eye contact with the debauched, freakish sicko while he strokes himself to the beauty of your face, the delicate details of each feature. Each gentle, sloppy stroke earns you a guttural, hoarse growl from the giant looming over your form who fists his leaking dick rapidly through euphoria. Your eyes flicker from his swollen and hung cock, to his silver, half-lidded eyes. “Just look at me, Mauschen. Bitte—!”

I mean, you want to pass, don't you? You'd be helpless without König. Show him some thankfulness and gratefulness. 📚

[san8ny]

can you pls write nerdy ellie? it can be sfw or nsfw

HOT! HOT!

?: Ellie is alot of things: She’s well articulated, She’s liked around campus, but for the life of her, she cannot get laid. It’s gotten pretty embarrassing, maybe you can help? - NSFW - Excuse me for any spell checks!

!: My mutuals have really yummy fics about nerd!Ellie so please let me know if you’d like any recommendations. - Thank you for your anon, means sm to me baby

You stare at her with an incredulous expression, the sight alone being one of pure unbridled shock upon this new-found discovery.

“Never?”

“Never.”

She reaffirms after you, running a nervous hand through her auburn tresses to ease the silent tension in the air. Ellie Williams, all around “good at fucking anything,” is a virgin. The thought alone was something that poked curiosity and incredulity. You knew she was quite kept to herself, often times busying with books and videogames, but this was something you didn’t expect. I mean, she was with Dina at one point.

You don’t want to make her make her more uncomfortable than the topic is, so you give her some form of comfort; “It’s quite normal, honestly, I don’t even blame you in this society.”

That earns you a laugh and a slight snort from her, throwing her head slightly back. “Yeah?”

You return a chuckle, shrugging, “Yeah, but you’ve atleast kissed before, right?

She immediately quiets down, olive-toned cheeks flushing with a light wash of embarrassment.

Holy fuck.

If you weren’t shocked before, you were gawking now.

“D-don’t look at me like that, man..” She groans, tossing her glasses onto the coffee table as she buries her face in a nearby decorative throw-pillow. “No, no— I don’t mean in a bad way, just surprised.”

“Surprised?” She murmurs softly, staring at the dim dorm lightbulb that hangs above them, “That’s a first. Dina usually calls me forcibly celibate.”

You want to curse yourself at the noise you let out, eyes watering as you slap your mouth with a cupped palm. Ellie side-eyes you with a scoff as she gets up from her seat, “Yeah, Yeah, Alright—“

“I’ll be serious! I promise.” You call out, reaching for her wrist to sit her back down, to which she does.

“Have you ever, like, considered it, though?”

Her interest piques at this turn, reaching for her glasses back, “What? Having sex?”

Well, duh.

Ellie hums, thinking about it for a second, “I wouldn’t be opposed to it..” She trails off, wiping her lenses with the corner of her graphic-tee, before putting them on. “Only to someone I really like.”

“Aw, that’s actually really sweet, I actually had a friend once who—

“Which is why I want you to fuck me.” She bluntly puts, staring at you four-eyed.

. . .

“Come again?” You cock your head out, “You want me to..?”

She inches forward, nodding like a bobblehead, “Yeah! It makes sense. You’re my friend, and I like you, so it’ll work.” You sigh, shaking your head, “Ells, it doesn’t work like that. What if you regret it?”

“So you’d agree to it if I don’t regret it?” She smiles, tone a bit ecstatic as she sees you entertain the idea.

She really was putting you on the spot, huh?

You stare at her for a bit, studying her face. She seemed enthusiastic about getting the opportunity to even lay hands on your soft skin. Saying you were pretty was an understatement, you were the epitome of wet-dreams; She was head over heels pretty much in-love with you, and the idea of even losing such a prize position like her virginity to you symbolized things she could only dream about.

You roll your eyes as you both kneel on her mattress, her fiddling with your bra like it’s the most complicated thing. “This shit is a death machine, holy smokes.”

Holy smokes?

When she finally succeeds, she’s jittery and giggling to herself, scooting back into the pillows to get a good look at your beautiful breasts. “They’re so fucking hot, ohmygod..” Next thing you know, she’s cupping them softly, kneading the fleshy dough in circular motions, gaze fixed on the way your back arches ever so slightly, eyes fluttering. So she is doing something, right?

She leans her head down, giving your perked areolas experimental licks, opting to suckle them when you give her the green. Your hand finds itself buried in her hair, massaging her tender scalp while she works her tongue on your sensitive buds, closing her own eyes at the pure idea she might be making you feel good.

After a while, you pull her off your tits, pushing her down onto the sheets as she looks at you confused. Poor baby doesn’t understand sex is transactional because she’s too busy giving you her all. You smile softly, leaning over her, legs on each side of her torso as you give her a kiss on the lips, the brief ‘smooch’ sound music to her ears as she opens her heavy lidded eyes back again; they’re filled with neediness, a surge of wanting to be touched more.

By the time you’ve readied her for the real thing, littering her body in soft bruising marks, her voice slightly higher pitched with each ‘uhn!’ she lets out, brows scrunched together and lips slightly ajar, coated in a sheen of saliva from how you kiss her with reassurance you’ll take care of her— she’s telling you with pants, no, begging— “P-please, baby? ‘Can’t take it anymore..”

She means her bottoms, fabric cruely soaked and covered in her own arousal from all the attention you’ve been giving her; Ellie feels lightheaded, tears brimming her crinkled eyes when you thumb her through her boxers. However, words cannot explain the feeling that rushes through her when you lean down and lick a fat strip through the cloth, eyes locked on hers. She hiccups a gasp, shuddering as the cold air hits her mound when you pull the elastic band from the side.

“I wanted to eat it through it, but I think you’re a bit impatient for that, so i’ll cut to what you want.” You whisper, warm breath fanning over her sensitive pussy. By the time you dig in, she’s whining at volumes you literally need to reach up her torso and cover her mouth.

“Uhn! Uhn—! F-fuck—?”

What sorcery did you have on her? Genuinely? She can’t believe she’s been withholding herself from such pleasure, your tongue trudging through her gummy folds making her want to die and come back again. She can barely even think straight, letting out muffled wails against your hand, saliva seeping through and rolling down your wrist in dribbles. You’d be disgusted, but the sight alone boosts your ego, you had her whipped.

Was it mentioned she’s already orgasmed before you even went near her cunt? That’s right, she already came once while you two were kissing. You definitely knew she’d atleast finish early, but damn were you surprised when she shook against you, humming against your lips rhythmatically.

“Am I making you feel good, baby? Can you talk f’me?”

She could barely hear you, and here you were, asking damn questions. Nonetheless, she gives you a small huff in response; alluding that she was somewhat conscious.

Once you deliver her to cum, she’s shivering against the sheets, balling her fists up as you rip both a cry, and orgasm out of her. “A-Ahnnnn..?!.”

Rest of the night, you two went at it like animals; Ellie insisting you teach her everything there was to know about sex in a singular sitting— ..fucking? To say you both tired eachother out would be an underemphasis.

You ruined her.

When you both seemingly knock out, well, atleast you, she slowly sits up, biting her bottom lip in anticipation as she gazes around your naked body, you were gonna sleep over..

She seems more excited at the prospect you’ll stay the night than the fact you two have been literally keeping the entire female dormitory quarters up— likely going to be hit with a personal visit by the RA.

Who cares, not Ellie for sure. She’ll happily flaunt the fact she’s (finally) got some, just to show off.

God, was she a geek.

[spotsupstuff]

OUGHHHRHGHHHHH MY LITTLE ASSHOLE FUCKS (and bessie little angel bessie)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AUGH THEY'RE SO PRETTY IN YOUR STYLE... watch out with cookin fish in a microwave he could explode like an egg

i am putting your little guys in my mental microwave @spotsupstuff

[hedgehog-moss]

I was talking with a friend the other day about how I was fascinated with American school life when I was a teen because it seemed so different from how things are in my country (I knew about US high schools thanks to Hollywood, an accurate and trustworthy source) and we talked about which aspects of US schools felt foreign or strange to us and one thing I brought up was, how American teens only seemed to have like 15min for lunch (I had 1h30 here in France), as evidenced by the cafeteria scenes (no one seemed to eat a proper four-course meal? I definitely never saw a separate cheese course), and I was like, I envied a lot of stuff about US schools but not this

... and I went looking in my old diaries to see if I ever wrote about this, and you know what? I was wrong. I did envy their school lunches which, like almost everything about US schools, felt intriguing and different and cool. The reason middle school-me thought American school lunches were superior to French ones is because, since American teens in TV shows only seemed to get like 4 chicken nuggets and a milk carton for lunch, their lunch tray was very light and they could hold it with one hand under it, the other hand in their pocket or holding their bag strap on their shoulder all casual-like. Sometimes there was no tray, even!

I envied these American teenagers for their lunchtime nonchalance. I would have liked to handle lunch in this cool-cat way but my French lunch tray being loaded with 4 different heavy and breakable plates, I had to hold it carefully with both hands. In my view this was unfair as the hindrance of governmental nutrition guidelines made French students look like uptight nerds, unable to strut around the cafeteria with one hand in our pocket like we didn’t care. Same for the absence of lockers in our schools, we had to carry all our books on our back all day like studious turtles whilst the beautiful 25 year old American teens on my television casually leant against their lockers chatting with friends then strolled around school with just a couple of books tucked under their arm like they were in Dead Poets Society. Thank god there was an ocean between us, imagine a French kid entering a US school cafeteria carrying 3 binders and 5 textbooks in their big rucksack and holding their tray with two hands like a complete loser

Note that these comparisons are quite worthless since I don't know what US school life / food is like in the real world (I imagine it varies a lot!)—I just find it funny to re-read old diaries and discover what was important to kid-me. Discussing these little cultural differences gleaned from US TV series, adult!me is like "yeah I remember being intrigued & envious about a lot of things! Not their school lunches though, they didn't look balanced and nutritious"—meanwhile middle school-me, focused on what mattered, was like, imagine what we could be... imagine being able to hold your lunch tray with 1 hand instead of 2 thus accessing a realm of coolness unfathomable to us in our backward country

[danielhowell]

This Night: Paperback Edition!

Hello BRITISH FOLLOWERS and YES this is DISCRIMINATING

It is my ecstatic joy to announce that I have been given the highest honour an author could ever hope for — my book about how to sort your shit out (take control of your mental health) You Will Get Through This Night, is being rereleased in paperback on May 9th in the UK! It will never be lighter, cheaper or more flexible.

Look out for it in the hands of weary travellers standing listlessly in an airport WHSmith, about to lose their last glimmer of hope before this book instantly magically changes their life. This new edition of This Night features a new disturbingly optimistic and snazzy inverted cover design. It has new topics and chapters, new practical exercises you can do to make yourself feel better when you may need it - and a painfully sincere epilogue reflecting on the impact this book has had, and my gratitude for everyone that has read it. If you already read the hardback - this is a great update featuring even more tips and helpful breakdowns of why you have unhelpful breakdowns. If you are yet to read this book at all ...like... it's actually very useful. You might not think you have 'problems' but we all do, it's human nature. If you learn literally one interesting thing or tool to manage your own emotions from this book, is it worth buying to change your life forever? Just get it thank you okay that's it.

You can get this book anywhere BUT if you feel like supporting the nerd that wrote it, you can get en exclusive SIGNED copy only on the Daniel Howell Shop!

http://shop.danielhowell.com 

Also to be nice, the publishers over at Harper Collins are doing a contest to win a FREE beautiful enamel pin just for submitting proof of purchase.

pin competition button →

Thank you to everyone, and I'll be yapping about this closer to release date with some exciting events and all the contractually obligated marketing and press you could dream of.

— Dan

[pxtched]

NERD!MIGUEL X QUEENBEE!READER. NSFW DRABBLE - ‘Study night’

Miguel should’ve known it wouldn’t be a regular study night with you. He should’ve known it would’ve been something more than a study night like you said it was.

Books, pencils, clothing on the floor. You’re in your pink lingerie set in between his thighs. He’s naked on your bed, legs are spread wide open as you give him a handjob, edging him for what seems like forever.

He’s a whiny, sobbing mess. His glasses nearly falling off on his face as his face is flushed. You look at him, seeing him biting his bottom lip to muffle his whimpers and moans as tears fell down his face from his beautiful eyes.

You quicken your pace suddenly and he chokes up a loud moan, he throws his head back and closes his eyes as he moans out “I’m-I’m coming! ¡Oh-oh Dios! ¡joder! ¡Ya voy!” his hips thrusts up. Smirking at this sight and deciding he can hold on for a little bit more.

You stop your pace immediately, removing your hand from his overly sensitive dick and chuckle seeing his dick twitch. After a couple seconds after another ruined orgasm he looks back at you and whines more “why…” with a little pout you can’t help but feel bad for him.

You chuckle at him, “be patient, just wait until I tell you to come. you can do that right migs?” You coo at him with a small grin on your face. He pouts but nods. “Goood boy” you praised him and he let out a whimper, his dick twitched at it too.

You want back with your relentless pace but on his sensitive tip instead. His eyes shot open as his head immediately threw back, He was holding back whimpers and tried to hold on but the more you went. the more he couldn’t do it. He moaned out loudly, his hands grabbing the bedsheets tightly, his thighs tensing up, mouth open and his eyes rolling back as his hips starts thrusting up into your fist as he moaned out breathlessly “¡Joder-joder-joder!”

Before you can stop he came all over your hand and his lower abdomen, he groaned after his release and let out a whimper when you slap his dick for not coming when you said he could.

“You couldn’t even wait.” You scolded him as you get up from your bed he watches you with a pout on his face “lo siento…”

Tags! @ultravioletrayz , @safixiovi , @syler-griffin , @jadeloverxd , @rxckstarss (i figured you’ll like this!)

(nerd!miguel credit @nymphomatique )

Reblogs help a lot! Thank you and goodbye!

master-list _ guidelines/rules _ abt me !

[snoopcco]

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

제이크 , false image.

>_< mai’s endless fluff saga

⊹ ࣪ ˖ popular!jake x quiet awkward! reader. ! 💻

⊹ ࣪ ˖ 🗒️ when reader meets popular jock jake who seems mean and unreachable, turns out to be a fluffy, obsessed, baby girl boyfriend. !

⊹ ࣪ ˖ ✩ jake occasionally calls reader ‘glasses’ (because reader is a slight nerd. 🤓☝️)

JAKE WAS DEFINITELY THE POPULAR GUY. known by everyone in their school, “sim jaehyun” this! “jake” that! the whole school knew jake, he was a jock, an amazing athlete, a smart student.

but that all changed once jake met her.

a recap of their love story? happy to tell you.

she was in the library, studying for the maths test, jake was roaming around. finding some peace and quiet in the library, that was his escape. his escape to just feel a bit free and more calm. at that moment, she dropped her wallet trying to reach for her pen, not even noticing that it fell over the table that only she had occupied.

with jakes fast reactions, he quickly noticed the wallet silently thudding on the carpeted, calling towards him.

he thought the girl had heard it, but to his luck, it seemed as if she was wearing headphones that were on 100% volume. jake couldn’t just leave the library all guilty for not telling some stranger that their wallet tipped over and was left on the ground, right?

so, he made his way slowly to the busy girl. picking up the wallet that was a few inches away from her chair, not trying to disturb her. the wallet landed on her desk, as she suddenly looked up.

jake took a slight glance at the studying girl, she had a high pony tail and clear specs that made her features pop out. she had doe eyes that her glasses couldn’t even hide from others even if you were far away.

he gulped, realizing that it was the ‘nerd’ in the school. but to him, he know found out when you looked at her longer, she was beautiful. she wasn’t ugly, but she seemed gorgeous to his eyes at first sight.

“your.. uhm.. wallet fell. I wanted to help you cause you seemed like you didn’t hear it.” his hand landed on the back of his neck, specifically, his nape. but to the girls eyes, he was the popular jock that couldn’t be seen with a person like her.

however, his tone. his soft voice, it made the mean and arrogant remarks of the jock disappear. “thank you, jake.” she bowed practically 90° from her seat, still stunned that jake initiated a conversation with her.

“may I sit here?” jake asked to bring up a question, wanting to have a small (a long conversation that could last for hours at a time) chat with the awkward student.

“oh um sure!”

(border >_<)

jake and the girl bickered and talked for a longer time period that they both wouldn’t had expected. they found out how similar they were despite their differences, leaving the girl who had been looked as the nerd, the girl who was an outcast.

and from that moment on, jake knew that the girl he had met was the one who had to be his.

“baby no! I have to go!” the girl whined, the clingy and pouty jake who didn’t want to let go of her waist that fit perfectly with his veiny hands. he tugged onto the front of her shirt, trying to lower the crop top.

“you can’t leave your boyfriend hanging all alone, glasses, and why should I let you leave in that short ass crop top? when I’m NOT even there.” jake frowned, but she was fed up. or she would be late.

“seriously jake! I need to leave right now.”

“no, glasses, your mine”

it drove crazy at how much jake knew her weaknesses, his cute tone, his eyes, his ability to make her feel butterflies in her stomach. It made her weak.

“glasses, stay, stay with your boyfriend. It would be better than any other shit you have to do, because your boyfriend can spoil you rotten.” jake kissed her on the cheek, still desperate for her to stay.

“no.”

jake soon grabbed her legs and put her over his shoulder, walking away from the door and back inside. “boy! jake! put me down right now!”

“don’t want to.” jake chuckled, all giddy. he loved making his girlfriend all mad and heated up, it made it more fun to tease her endlessly. is this what you get for having a boyfriend who is a serious athlete?

she thought, having a boyfriend like jake, he wouldn’t have any time for her. he would be a booked and busy guy who wouldn’t have time for her. LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER. jake went out of his way to cancel his matches if it was date night, or you wanted to hang out with him.

he made sure to always had time with you, he would rather save you then the world.

“I’m gonna kiss your face a billion times and maybe we could go already and do some of the annoying shit you need to do, hm?”

“JAKE!”

“no. it’s baby time, your mine now glasses!” jake smiled evilly, not planning to let her leave. not even in a billion years.

“this is what you get for having a jock boyfriend with a false image.”

@ jwnstars … !! so cutesie core.

OK HSHSSGGS LETS CALM DOWN AFTER THAT MUCH FLUFF ???!!!?? 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 finally got out of my writing slump and gave into writing again. like a breath of fresh air.

anyway… I don’t know how people overlook jake as the mean frat boy ??? I see him more as the clingy bestfriend of the frat boy who always follows him around ‘cuz they besties !!!!🥹🥹💞💞🎀🎀

[cherie-doll]

𓆩♡𓆪 Headcanon: Their First Date With You

ৎ୭ Ghost, Soap, Gaz, Alejandro, Phillip Graves, Keegan, König, Horangi, Nikto

︵‿୨♡୧‿︵ srry i've been in a slump but i'm back!! ૮ ◜ᵕ◝ ྀིა

Ghost

For him, simplicity and getting to know you felt more important than trying to impress you

He only wanted you to feel comfortable with him and have a good time with him

You both walked around the city, visiting cafés, bookstores, etc…

At one point you entered into a philosophical conversation with him

Random smiling/grinning when you’re being adorable and basking in comfortable silence

While on the sidewalk, you were startled a little when he lightly placed his hands on your shoulders to move you to the inside of the sidewalk

Soap

Took you to the movie theater

Wasn’t even focused on the movie and kept trying to make eye contact with you

You were hooked on the movie and didn’t notice his soft eyes

Eventually he fell asleep

By the end of the movie, as you were leaving the theater he just grinned as you talked about your favorite scenes not realizing he hadn’t even the faintest idea what it was about

Now, whenever you mention a movie you want to see he takes you to watch it

Gaz

You and he had taken an evening to walk shelter dogs

It was the most fun you had, both of you were laughing and smiling the entire time

In a moment of silence, he admires you

He wants to stay there beside you, freeze this moment, and leave a trace of you & him

“Thank you… for today”

Takes you into his eyes before you have to go

Alejandro

Soft, romantic dinner at the beach as the sun sets

The hue of the setting sun is a beautiful view

The soft glow of the candles highlights his features and you can’t help but feel warm and fuzzy on the inside

You didn’t pay as much attention to the food as you did to the warm caress of his hand on yours

Wanted to dance with you afterwards, oh, you can’t dance? Dw abt that he fs didn’t mind placing his hands on your hips guiding them, or sliding them down your lower back correcting your posture…

Phillip Graves

He had wanted to take you to a diner but it was closed

So instead he brought you home to his place and made you a nice meal

He’s being charming and flirting with you the entire time

With music playing in the background and smiling as you prepared dinner together

It is now your favorite thing to do together

Keegan

Took you out late at night to stargaze

While driving around in his car he let you pick the music

He was very relaxed when with you, open and warm

Observing you out of the corner of his eye and being attentive to your mannerisms and habits

Forget him looking at the stars, instead he’s admiring you

Fingers intertwining on the grassy field

König

Boyyy he’s nervous when the date is coming up

He would prob want to find out what you like first before picking out the place

Deep down if you let him he’d like to take you softly by the hand and show you his favorite hangout spots

One of y’all is a nerd which is how you end up at a museum

You find that he’s a bit of a nerd when he rambles about his hobbies, and it’s cute

His smiles that last long after you’ve left

Horangi

Goes all out

Takes you out to a nice, lavish restaurant

Beforehand, he had gifted you expensive clothing, shoes, and jewelry of your style to wear for the date

Since the first date, he made it a habit to give you a gift at the end of every date

You were prepared to split the bill but he did not let that happen

Will brag to anyone willing to listen about how he got to take a baddie out

Nikto

You didn’t even realize he it had been a date until he asked how you liked the “date”

“That was a date?” “Wasn’t it obvious?”

You assumed the three hours you spent watching him cook his specialty meal was just his way of being nice when you had asked him for dinner suggestions

He may seem stolid but there is tactfulness in his essence

Very respectful of you and not wanting to cross any boundaries

[chillinglyadventurous]

A Real Treat

“Leave the bowl on the porch,” he said between kisses placed on your shoulder.

Word count: 1,387

Tags: NSFW, MDNI

“Which one of you is going out with the twins?” You called into the living room from the kitchen, dumping candy into the large plastic bowl on the counter. You pulled out a Twix, unwrapping it before popping it into your mouth. “I don’t want what happened on Summerween to repeat itself.”

You could hear Dipper and Mabel shuffling around in the attic, fighting over whether they should be ketchup and mustard or salt and pepper. You laughed when you heard Mabel yell, “Why do we always have to be food?!”

You were kind of glad you weren’t going with them. You’d be up and down all night giving out candy, but the ruby red slippers you were wearing were not conducive to the weather despite hitting mid-calf, so you carried your bowl into the living room to find Ford. He stood by the fish tank and just the sight of him made you laugh. His hair was a mess and the white lab coat he was wearing was splotched in fake blood. Well, you hoped it was fake. He was really leaning into the whole mad scientist thing.

Ford smiled when you came into the room, placing your bowl on the t-Rex skull. “You look beautiful.”

“It was the only women’s costume that didn’t make me look like a slut,” you said with a roll of your eyes. “Why is it that women’s costumes have to be slutty? It's freezing too! Who wants to be wearing basically nothing and freeze all night?”

He kissed your forehead, hand falling to your hip. “I could keep you warm.” His voice in your ear caused a shiver to roll down your spine. That wicked grin faded when Stan and the kids came down the stairs. “Ah, Stanley, what are you supposed to be?”

You clocked the striped suit. Stan’s face was painted white, eyes blacked out. You stepped back from Ford’s hold. “Beetlejuice.”

“Who?” Ford laughed. “Who is Beetlejuice?”

Mabel’s jaw dropped, “If one of you says that again, I’m going to lose it.”

“Beetlejuice!” Dipper shouted.

Stan gave an annoyed huff. “Okay, losers, stop that.” He ruffled ketchup’s and mustard’s hair, “You condiments ready to hit the road? I’ve scoped out the best neighborhood. If we get there early, we have a seventy-five percent greater chance of snaggin’ some full-size candy bars. I’m not playing around with that fun-sized crap this year.”

“Have fun,” you laughed, “and, Stan, please don’t let them eat all of their candy tonight. You’re not the one who has to take care of sick kids in the morning.”

Stan waved you off. “Yeah, yeah, you young people and this health craze. Whatever. What happened to stuffing your face with sugar and no consequences, huh?”

“I’m 30.”

“Yeah,” Stan sputtered, “young.”

“Bye, [Y/N]!” Dipper and Mabel called as the sprinted out the door.

Stan waved over his shoulder. “Have fun handin’ out candy, nerds.”

When the door slammed shut you gave a sigh of relief, thankful that you wouldn’t have to deal with the chaos this time. Summerween had been a nightmare.

You laughed, arms winding around Ford’s neck again. “Why is it that your brother can do math when it comes to money and candy, but nothing else?

He shrugged in response. Your words quickly forgotten. “So,” Ford leaned into your hold, “who is Beetlejuice?”

“It’s a movie,” you said simply. “We can watch it when they get back. It came out in 1988, so you just missed it.”

For the most part, you and Ford took turns handing out candy to the kids who dared to traverse the spooky and dangerous, if you were being honest, maze Stan had set up in the front yard. When you weren’t handing out candy, however, you were draped over your boyfriend who’s six fingers kept trying to sneak their way up the hem of your dress as a slasher film played on screen. His plans were thwarted with each knock on the door.

“You’re turn,” he huffed. He helped you stand, hand grazing up the back of your thigh as you stood.

You could feel his eyes peeling away at your clothes as you walked to the door. It made you blush. You tried to forget the way his teasing hands felt on your legs, the way he did his best to seem sly enough for you not to notice.

You opened the door to see four children dressed as a witch, a fairy, a ghost, and a vampire. “Wow,” you gushed, “you guys look great!”

“Trick or treat!”

You gave them each a large handful of candy. You smiled, hoping your two trick-or-treaters were having just as much fun as the kids sprinted away from the door and into the darkness. Still, you just hoped some candy monster wasn’t stalking Dipper and Mabel. That was a mess.

Two hands taking hold of your waist pulled you out of thought. “Leave the bowl on the porch,” he said between kisses placed on your shoulder. His arms snaked around you as Ford rested his chin on your shoulder. “ His fingers fiddled with the braids in your hair.

“It’s almost 9:00,” you sighed as you pressed back into him. “The kids will be home soon.”

“All the more reason to leave the bowl on the porch.”

He looked so mischievous when you turned around in his arms. Before you could speak, he lifted you off your feet, the door slamming shut. Your legs were tightened around his waist. His face was pressed firmly to your neck, kisses dropped haphazardly as he carried you through the Shack. You thanked the Ford who built this house all those years ago for not putting his bedroom too far from the front door when he dropped you onto the mattress.

“Based on Stan’s plans for the evening,” his voice was gruff as he pushed up the hem on your dress, “we have approximately twenty minutes.”

He didn’t bother to undress himself, sliding your panties down your legs. No time to respond, he hitched your right leg over his shoulder, pinning your left knee to the mattress. “You look good enough to eat,” he chuckled, sliding down your body. “A real treat.”

He disappeared beneath your dress, his tongue on you. You gave a shaking moan. His tongue swirling and dipping inside of you. You sighed his name as you felt two of his digits slip inside of you, hitting that spot with a simple curl. Just as you were teetering on the edge, your name spilling out of your mouth like a prayer, he pulled away. Wet kisses were worked up your whole body.

With a rushed brush of his lips against yours, you felt him push inside of you. Twin gasps escaped the two of you and you loved that sound. Everytime you found yourself with him between your legs, that sound was always your favorite.

He stayed still for a long while, enjoying the feeling of your warmth around his length, the way your walls fluttered around him, how wet you were for him without much effort. “You’re stunning,” he punctuated his words with a deep kiss to your lips.

As his hips rocked into you, you held tight to him. You didn’t care about the sticky fake blood across his lab coat that had begun to coat your thighs. You’d be covered in it by the time this was over, but you couldn’t care less.

“We have to make this quick.” You were already there. Painfully, you waited for that single thrust that would finally make you cum. “Please, Stanford.”

It was hard, upward thrust right into your G-spot and you came undone. He ignored your moans, you begs for him to never stop. He fucked you through it until you were pliable and limp against the sheets. That was when his rhythm falters, a sharp ‘fuck’ falling from his mouth against your cheek.

Neither of you had a chance to catch your breath before you heard Stan grumbling outside. “Why’s the candy bowl outside?” Both you and Ford jumped up. He followed you into the living room, zipping his pants as he went.

“Hey,” you grinned, feigning innocence, “get a good haul?” Ford’s hand found the small of your back, unable to resist touching you.