#// he worked out in his room for like 3 nights in a row bc he was out of other things to do. mona had to stop him

[fiilemade]

mind: does my muse have any mental conditions that affect their lives? what are they? how do they handle them? what coping methods do they use most? (To Kotone and/or Ren)

▻ all about health ( accepting! )

Starting with the more obvious of the two, Kotone deals primarily with depression and PTSD- much like her counterpart. While she does mask the former, it still rears it's head in certain habits ( disordered eating, routinely staying in bed until she's the last one up, slacking in school and social life pre-SEES, occasional disregard for self care/preservation ) and gives her a certain level of difficulty in enjoying some outings to their fullest. In certain verses, particularly the post-P3 au and PQ2, it also severely aggravates her lowered sense of self worth. As for her PTSD, particularly stemming the Moonlight Bridge Incident and resulting loss of her parents, Kotone copes via dissociation- something that ended up extending into other traumatic events as well ( ex. October 4th, the Chairman's betrayal, nearly crashing in the train. ) While symptoms of this are far more subtle in regards to mentions of her parents or status as an orphan, they can be rather severe following major events in the game and extremely visible, much to her displeasure after the episode. Additionally, Kotone has developed a heavy anxiety around stalkers and being watched, and is immensely uncomfortable with photos of her being taken by surprise.

Ren also suffers from anxiety and PTSD, originating from the court case against him at the start of the game and.....well, it really did just keep snowballing with every antagonist faced, didn't it- While he doesn't show it much to the people around him, and he does make considerable progress building himself back up, it did severely impact him and knocked him down to one of the lowest points in his life, and I personally interpret his stats at the start of the game not his baseline, but rather the remains left after the court and prison system destroyed his self confidence. For what symptoms that do show, Ren deals with dissociative amnesia ( canon! He has visible difficulty recalling details about the night he was arrested ), abstains from eating while under stress, and often experiences vertigo/nausea/tremors when his anxiety is triggered ( his main triggers being required signatures and threat of suing or immediate arrest. ) Additionally, he often feels difficulty grounding himself in reality when faced with threatening situations outside of the metaverse, and struggled a lot against depression and disassociation during 3rd semester. The former in particular unfortunately stuck around, and was a common hurdle for him in post-game back in the countryside. While he does his best to mask his symptoms, and is incredibly proficient in hiding his true feelings ( or ailments, if he's suffering from any ), he does also actively cope by keeping himself as busy as possible, and will often resort to heavy workouts when there is nothing left to do.

[ashwhowrites]

Older! Eddie Munson x reader, who works at at store with Eddie, Eddie, who's in charge of her bc she's the new one in the store, they sometimes get kind of flirty with each other, and one night after work they go to a bar and end up sleeping together, turns out Reader is the daughter of (it could be Steve or Billy) and Eddie's like what the hell, and he's scared because he thinks Reader's dad is gonna destroy him, punch him really bad (or something like that?) Eddie stays away from reader except from work. They both miss each other, and then they talk and when Eddie tells her what's his concern she's like my dad already knows he's not mad at you he wants to meet you

I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting <3

Billy's daughter

Y/N was in college, on her own, and knew she needed a job. It would be impossible to afford anything. She wandered around her small college town and looked into every store to see a help-wanted sign.

She cheered as she saw a help wanted sign, it seemed to be a small store. She walked in and took in the small room. Shelves stacked with snacks, candies, and a row of beverages. She saw a man, maybe in his forties, at the front counter. He had dark curly brown hair and it was tied into a low bun. Loose pieces framed his face, which called attention to his sharp jawline. He had soft pretty brown eyes.

"What can I help you with today?" His voice was low and deep. She couldn't help but feel her knees weaken just by looking at this stranger.

"Looking for a job!" She said

Eddie gave her a look up and down. Without missing a beat he said "hired."

~~~

And that was a week ago. She found out his name was Eddie and he was the manager of the store. He was indeed older, with no kids and no ring on his finger. He didn't talk about a girlfriend, and the way he flirted with Y/N, made her think he was single. At least she hoped.

Since she was new, she worked all her shifts with him. He trained her and kept an eye on her. The job wasn't that hard and she probably didn't need to train for as long as she was. But she wasn't going to complain about the extra time she got with him one-on-one. She never could wipe the smile off of her face when she saw their names written next to each other on the calendar. She noticed there were a few employees, and she never worked with them or even met them. But she was okay with that. She'd rather have all that time with Eddie anyway.

She felt stupid to have a crush on her boss. But she couldn't help it. He was a walking sex dream. His tattooed arms, and his smokey cologne. His sexy smirk and the way he teased her when she got embarrassed for staring.

He was charming, she had to admit that. He knew how to make her heart flutter. He flirted with full confidence, he knew she had a crush on him. She made it obvious with how she stuttered and practically fell over her feet in front of him.

"You didn't hear one word I said, did you?" His sexy chuckle made her body hot as she blinked repeatedly. She didn't notice he even started talking, and she didn't notice he was done with helping the customer. How long was he talking to her?

"Well, that's about," he looked down at his watch, "ten minutes this time. Kinda a new record." He teased. The wink he sent her way didn't help the butterflies in her stomach.

"You were talking to me for ten minutes? Why didn't you get my attention sooner!" She said, smacking his arm lightly as he laughed.

"Your little dreamy look is adorable. Your eyes get huge and your mouth is slightly open." He continued to tease her as she smacked him over and over. She felt like she was in middle school, hitting the boy she liked while he hit on her.

"It's not my fault!" She said

"It's not mine!" He argued back, his smile bright and his dimples popped.

"It is! You're so hot and you know it. And you use it against me!" She said, her brain barely realizing what she was saying.

"Nah uh, baby," his finger waved in her face, she was embarrassed by how badly she wanted to wrap her mouth around it. The nickname baby went straight to her cunt as she shifted. "I use the crush you have against you, not my looks. It's fun to watch you get so," he said, whispering as he moved closer to her face. His nose was practically against hers. "Squirmy and horny."

She felt the air get stuck in her throat, and she was pretty sure he was close enough to hear her choke on it. She didn't know what to say, she just stared into his eyes. She leaned in, her eyes flicked down to his lips.

But she felt the feeling of cold air as he smirked and leaned back. His face was now feet away from hers as he chuckled.

"I don't kiss my employees." He winked.

~~~

She felt so much relief when she finished her shift. She needed a cold fucking shower after all the teasing Eddie put her through.

"Wanna go get a drink?"

Now she was tipsy at a bar, and all her respect was out the window. Eddie teased her and teased her. She was horny and he knew it. So no shame in acting on it. He was telling a story, but all she heard was blah blah blah. She chugged the rest of her drink, then slammed it down on the table. She didn't wait for his story to be done, she smashed her lips on his. She was desperate, and he could feel it. Her hands went to his chest, as she gripped his shirt in a tight grasp. She yanked him closer by his shirt and slipped her tongue in his mouth. She moaned in delight when he kissed her back. His tongue was wet and warm against hers as his hand held the back of her head. She wanted him to touch her everywhere. From the kiss alone she was burning in delight and lust.

"Wanna get out of here?" He asked against her lips.

"I can't wait that long." She whimpered and it was true. She needed him now.

Eddie nodded and grabbed her hand. She followed behind as he led them into the one-stall bathroom. Her first time with Eddie was in a dirty bar bathroom, and she didn't care. Her back was slammed against the door as he locked it. Her hands immediately went to yank down her pants and panties. She pushed off Eddie's jacket as he worked on unbuttoning his jeans. He slipped out his cock from his jeans and hissed at the coldness of the air. He didn't mind since he was seconds away from being in her warm cunt.

She reached behind and gripped his ass as he pushed himself inside of her.

It was fast, rough, and desperate. Their teeth clashed as they kissed and her head smacked against the door with every thrust. But her body has never felt better.

~~~

Eddie dropped her off at home since she was too buzzed to drive. Her car left at the store parking lot so she had to ask her dad for a ride.

"Eddie Munson is your manager?" Billy asked as he pulled up to the store.

"Yeah. Isn't he cute?" Y/N gushed. She couldn't believe just last night he was pounding into her. He made her have so many butterflies, that it felt like a zoo was in her stomach.

"Ew but sadly, many girls thought that in high school. Just be safe with an older guy, okay?" Billy said. Weirdly, he was cool with Y/N dating whoever she wanted. He raised his daughter to be smart. She was an adult and he couldn't stop her from dating anyone. He valued his relationship with his daughter and didn't want to lose it over being controlling. That's exactly how he learned to hate his parents.

"He's a good guy, I promise I'm safe." She pecked her dad's cheek as she got out of his car. A huge smile on her face as she walked into the store.

~~~

Eddie felt his palms get sweaty when he saw Y/N pull up in Billy's car. He hadn't seen Billy since highschool and honestly was still terrified of him. His icy blue eyes sent Eddie a glare as he drove off. Why was Billy driving her?

"Hi handsome," Y/N said, leaning over the counter to peck Eddie's cheek.

"Why was Billy Hargrove driving you?" Eddie asked, ignoring the kiss on his cheek.

"He's my dad," Y/N said it like it was no big deal. She simply shrugged and went into the office to clock in.

Now Eddie was even more terrified. He fucked Billy's daughter. And not in a romantic way. He fucked her raw in a bar bathroom like she was a whore. And he knew something happened because why else would Billy glare at him as he drove off?

"So! What's the plan for tonight? Wanna go see a movie?" Y/N asked, oblivious to Eddie practically shaking in the spot next to her.

"I think last night was a mistake," Eddie said he didn't think it through. His focus was on Billy and the fastest way to escape a beatdown. Breaking Billy's daughter's heart? Yeah, he didn't think that through.

Y/N felt the breath get caught in her lungs but in the worst way. Her eyes immediately got wet as Eddie's words sank into her skin, the same skin he sank his teeth in hours ago.

"Um, why?" She asked she tried to hide the fact she wanted to cry. She knew her crush was dumb. He probably enjoyed the little cat-and-mouse game. He got her so now he was done.

"Because I feel like it was!" He argued. He was hiding his fear behind anger. But he had no reason to be angry at her. But he was. He was so pissed that she didn't bother to tell him who her dad was. Yet again, why would she? She didn't know Eddie knew her dad. It wasn't like she did it on purpose, but Eddie punished her like she did.

"It wasn't to me. I like you and I think you like me too." She tried to understand him, was it all an act?

"Well, you thought wrong. Sorry to see that you got your hopes up." He talked to her like she was nothing like she meant nothing. And it crushed her more than he'd ever known.

Neither spoke for the rest of their shift. She felt embarrassed to be so excited about how she thought today would go.

~~~

When she came in the next day, she was shocked to see someone different behind the counter. She read their name tag and realized it was just another employee. One that she saw countless times on the schedule. She wasn't stupid, she knew Eddie went and took away all the shifts they would have together. She hated how much it hurt.

A week went by and Y/N still hasn't seen Eddie. Billy noticed the change in his daughter's attitude. She didn't talk much about it, just the gist that Eddie wasn't interested anymore. She tried to seem like she was fine, but Billy knew she wasn't. But it wasn't his place to be involved. He felt sorry for her. They spent many dinners talking about Eddie coming over so she could have her dad meet a potential boyfriend.

~~~

Y/N was shocked to see Eddie back behind the register. After two weeks of him ghosting her, she didn't expect to see him again.

She didn't say a word, walking past him as she clocked in. She craved to hear his voice, and she wanted to cry and beg for him to just give her a chance. She knew she could be worth it. She didn't know what about her wasn't good enough.

Eddie found himself wanting to say something but he knew he shouldn't. He knew he should apologize and leave her alone. He hurt her more than he did anything else. A damn good reason for Billy to give him a black eye.

The shift went slow and Y/N wanted to tear her hair out. No customers, so the two sat in silence for hours. She felt his eyes on her every so often but she refused to give in. He made it clear she was an idiot child with a crush and that's all she was.

She checked the time on the clock, she had another two hours and she wasn't sure she could handle it. She thought fast and the lie sped off her tongue.

"Is it cool if I dip early? I've got plans." She asked.

Eddie jumped at the sound of her voice, he was prepared for a whole day of silence.

"Um yeah, that's cool." He wanted her to stay. Even if he was too chicken to talk to her, he liked having her near. He liked knowing she wasn't anywhere, she was right there with him.

It wasn't his place to ask, but his stomach turned at the thought of what the plans were.

"Is it a date?" He asked. He tried to sound nonchalant about it, just making casual conversation. He looked over at her, this time surprised to see her looking at him.

"Yes." She said Eddie hated the answer and he hated the way she looked right into his eyes to tell him. Once again, it wasn't his place to have his heart feel like it was squeezed in her hands. It wasn't his place to feel a sick feeling in his stomach like something was stuck in his throat.

Neither said anything more. She walked out of the office and clocked out. She gathered her things, a silent wave to him as she walked past. Inches away from her car when she heard the tiny bell of the door and footsteps behind her.

Her arm was tugged and her body was wiped around. Her body smashed against Eddie's. Before she knew it, his warm lips were on hers. She tried to fight it, she tried to fight it so hard. She could feel his lips repeatedly pressing against hers, just begging for her lips to move against his. His hands gripped her elbows as he desperately held on to her.

"Please." He begged against her lips, his eyes were closed. He was too scared to look at her. He waited and prayed she'd kiss him back.

But all he felt was a sting on his right cheek as she slapped him right across the face. He groaned at the impact but knew he deserved it. Then finally, her lips pressed against his. Her hands wrapped around his neck as she passionately kissed him. She needed one moment of weakness.

Eddie whimpered as she pulled away. His lips chased after her but she moved her head. She removed her arms from him and pushed his hands off of her.

"Please don't go on that date."

"Why, Eddie? You made it clear it was all in my head." She explained, her heart felt the familiar sting.

"I lied! I like you so much. And that night wasn't a mistake. I've wanted it since I met you. You're beautiful, sexy, and sweet. I knew you liked me so I went for it. I don't regret it. I didn't know Billy was your dad, once I found that out I panicked. I figured he'd be pissed at me for going after his young daughter and I was scared he would punch me. Which I see runs in the family." He said as he pointed to his cheek. A red mark forming.

"Why didn't you just say that!" Y/N groaned, smacking Eddie's arm in the flirty way she used to. "My dad and I have a close relationship. And he wanted you over for dinner. He's fine with you being older. He's way more pissed at you for sleeping with me than ignoring me."

"Billy wants dinner with me?" Eddie was shocked.

"Well, probably less after you ignored me for weeks." Y/N shrugged. She enjoyed making Eddie sweat.

"I'm so sorry about that. I truly am." He apologized.

"I forgive you. Next time, don't be an idiot. Just talk to me about your fears. Otherwise, a relationship will never work."

"A relationship? I like the sound of that." Eddie smiled.

"Me too." She winked, moving in to press her lips against his again.

~~~

"Alright, my dad should be here any minute. Are you ready?" Y/N asked. She and Eddie were closing the store while they waited for Billy to pick them up. Billy refused to let Eddie meet them at the restaurant, he said he'd pick them up and they would all drive together. Which terrified Eddie, but he couldn't lie he always wanted to be in the same car as the famous Billy Hargrove.

"Yes. Just one more thing!" Eddie said, leaning over the counter to smash his lips on hers. She giggled into the kiss and held his face.

"Thought you didn't kiss employees." She teased, he smiled against her lips.

"I'm not. I'm kissing my girlfriend."

Honk

Honk

Tags!

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @manyfandomsfanvergentreblogs @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37

[call-me-strega]

How to Become a Step-Dad in 5 Easy Steps: ch.3/5 of p.2

First, prev, next, lore, ao3

OK SO- I’ve been working on this for months and I was actually supposed to have it done like a month ago but my parents took me on the last minute vacation to another country to visit family and I didn’t have access to my laptop most of the time. But it’s okay bc the timing worked out! I wrote most of this on my phone actually and I’m posting it from there too so I hope the formatting isn’t weird. Our flight back is tonight and we’re in a different time zone so I really hope this is going up at the correct time. Anyways I tried to make this chapter longer so I hope it’s worth it. Thanks for sticking around to read this and I’ll let you start now.

-Strega p.s Happy 4th of July!

~~~

Chapter description:

Danny and Jason comfort each other after a rough night, Jason teams up with Duke to stop a villain, and Jason spends the 4th of July with the Nightingales.

~~~

Everything was hot. Someone was laughing. Someone was crying. It's all too loud but he can't hear a thing. It was so hot. He could taste the bitterness in the air. His face ached. It's too much. All the textures overwhelm him but he can’t feel a thing. It was too hot. All he can see is rows of black upon gray, but he can't really see anything at all. He couldn’t- he couldn’t breathe. His forehead was wet and sticky. Why was it wet and sticky? Why was it so goddamn hot?!

With a desperate gasp for air, Jason launched up into a sitting position on his bed. He supported his body with one hand and the other pushing back his white, sweat-soaked fringes out of his eyes. He sat there for a few moments, just panting, trying to regain some semblance of control over his breathing. He felt a warm sweat drip down his face and back. It made his skin crawl.

He looked around his dark room and then down at his messy sheets for a moment, before pulling off the blanket and flinging himself off the bed. He couldn't stand the idea of staying there a minute longer. Not right now.

He stalked out of his bedroom and into his living area. He didn't want to stay inside. The thought of being in an enclosed space right now gave him the hives, no matter how spacious the apartment might be. Even if it's bigger than a coffin. Even if it's smaller than a warehouse. He can't see the sky. He's closed in.

Instead, he pushes open his window and pulls himself out onto the fire escape. It's not particularly open, facing into an alley, but it offers privacy and is heaps better than being inside. He slumps down against the brick wall of the building, feet planted and knees bent. He looks up and takes a breath trying to calm himself. Even with all the smog and Gotham's perpetual cloud cover, Jason is grateful to see the sky. He half-wished it was a clear night so he could see the stars. The other half didn't. It didn't think he could handle seeing the stars peeking out through the smog. It would look too much like a night sky tainted with smoke and bad memories.

His mouth felt dry as he clenched and stretched his hands. He almost wished for a cigarette or a joint, (no he didn't, he didn't want to see the smoke, to feel the heat of the slow burn) but the thought made his lungs constrict and he felt bile rise in his throat. Instead, he alternated between closing his eyes and taking several deep breaths, and gazing at the lights and laundry lines. Even in the sticky city heat of a Gotham summer Jason shuddered from the cool night air.

Suddenly, he heard metal creaking and his eyes snapped open. His head jerked to the side where the sound had come from. A few feet away, on the adjacent fire escape, stood a figure slumped over the rail. They must have also sensed his presence because they turned to meet Jason's gaze.

Before him stood a haggard Danny Nightingale with dark circles under his eyes and a head of bed hair. He wore an old worn-out shirt for a band called Dumpty Humpty, and a pair of basketball shorts that came down to his knees. Faintly, Jason could make out a faded scar on his calf. (Not that Jason had been staring at his legs or anything!) Jason soon became aware of Danny's own eyes assessing him as well. He felt his face heat up and was grateful that he slept in sweats and a white tank tonight.

And the two of them stayed there for a while, on their fire escapes. Two souls in the haunted hours before morning, looking worse for wear, just staring at each other as the world continued on around them.

Then, Danny weakly gave Jason a wry grin and in a rough voice he said,

" Hey, neighbor."

" Hey," Jason replied hoarsely, with a small grin forming on his face. "Funny running into you here, huh?"

There was a brief pause where the two continued to stare at each other, suppressing the quickly growing urge to laugh.

Danny broke first.

" Pffffffft, you dork!"

The two of them burst out laughing and the atmosphere grew lighter. The ever-present smog and darkness seemed to lift and the shadows haunting them seemed to fade.

Danny bubbled up with giggles that rang in Jason’s ear like a familiar song coming on on the radio. Jason looked at him softly in quiet wonderment. Well, I guess that’s where Ellie got her laugh from.

Jason heaved himself off the ground and walked over to the railing closest to Danny, who was just coming down from his high. He leaned over, one arm on the railing and the other coming up to support his jaw. He gave Danny a tired smile.

“Hey,” he said once more.

“Hey yourself,” came Danny’s soft reply.

Then the two, now standing closer, took a moment to examine each other once more. Danny took note of Jason’s sweat and unsteadiness. Jason could now see that Danny’s hands shook lightly and were covered in faded, barely-there scars. They met each other’s eyes and both just felt like the other understood.

Tonight hadn’t been a good night for either of them. But they didn’t need to talk about it right now. No, for now the two could just bask in each others presence The air filling with a certain solidarity and what felt like a near-tangible sense of mutual comfort.

Jason turned away first, observing the way light and shadow danced across alley walls and how the clothes on clotheslines fluttered in the night breeze. Danny followed his gaze in suit, trying to identify what Jason saw out in the city.

“ Ya know for being such a hell-hole Gotham really does have a subtle beauty to it.”

Jason turned to look a Danny with mock offense.

“Hey! Gotham may be a hell-hole but it’s our hell-hole! Just ask any true Gothamite, the city has a way sinking itself into ya.”

Danny looked almost amused by this statement, but nodded in understanding.

“Yeah, I think I kinda get it. It really sucked back home, but it was still home, ya know? And I agree, Gotham does have her ways of making you feel like she’s a part of you. We’ve only been here bout a month or so but I already feel like Ell and I are well on our way to become city slickers through and through.”

Jason chuckled, shaking his head and bringing his arm down to stand up straight. He decide to pursue the opening Danny had left.

“Speaking of Ell, she the reason your up so late?”

“Naw,” Danny’s smile grew a bit strained. “My little spitfire may have a lotta energy but the girl sleeps like the dead.” He grew a more subdued, looking down at his hands.

“Nah, this was something else.”

“Nightmare?” He probed gently.

Danny nodded.

Taking a breath, Jason said “Me too,” in a show of vulnerability that he found came surprisingly easy. Danny glanced at him sympathetically.

“You wanna talk about it?”

“Kinda, but at the same time not really?”

Danny nodded as if he understood perfectly. Once more a comfortable silence overtook they began to shift closer. Even with the space between their fire escapes they felt impossibly close.

Danny interrupted the quiet with a light chuckle and Jason returned him a questioning glance. Danny shook his head,

“ Nothing I just think it’s kinda ironic we both came out to our fire escapes to escape our bad dreams.” He paused as his face clouded with confusion. “ Or at least I think it’s irony? Would you call it irony?”

“I think it might actually be symbolism but fuck if I know. I don’t have the mental capacity to figure which literary devices apply to our situation right now but remind me to come back to it later.”

Danny hummed in amusement before taking a deep breath.

“ I think I wanna talk about it.”

“Hmm?” Jason raised an eyebrow

“ I think I wanna talk about my dream.”

In a split second Jason makes a impulsive decision.

“Hold on,” he says, before climbing over the railing and extending his foot over to reach Danny’s fire escape.

“ What are you doing, ya maniac?!” Danny asked incredulously at Jason’s actions.

Jason stepped over onto the fire escape and shrugged as he walked over to Danny, “This felt like something I should be close for.”

The startled man seemed to loosen up and sunk to sit on the platform with his back to the railing. Jason joined him on the floor. They sat shoulder to shoulder, Danny staring at his trembling hand, and Jason, staring at him. Jason hand crept towards Danny’s, gentle taking it and interlacing the fingers.

Danny’s head swiveled to look at him and Jason returned him a gentle look and a squeezed his hand reassuringly. Faintly, the young man smiled and squeezed back. He took a deep breath and began.

" So you remember how you found my groceries in an alley the other day?”

Jason nodded.

“ Yeah well, the reason I left them there was because some mugger tried to kidnap Ellie. I ditched the groceries to grab her and get home.”

“ You did a smart thing,” Jason continued to nod as if he didn’t already know exactly what happened that day.

“ Mm I don’t doubt that, Ellie’s safety will always be my first priority. But the whole thing kinda brought up old fear. Some old … memories.”

A distant look grew on his face and Jason’s heart burned with sadness and anger for his friend.

“ The dream started out back in that alley. I had just pulled Ellie back into my arms but when I turned around it wasn’t the mugger standing there. It was Vlad.” Danny’s breath staggered before he continued.

“He started saying stuff about taking Ellie back since he’s the one who made her. The one who had wanted her originally, never mind that he’d lost interest after realizing she was a girl and not his perfect son. But he kept saying things about how he had more life experience and was better equipped to raise her. How he’d be able to do better than me and provide more for her. And for me, if I let him. I hated it. I hated him for leveraging his age and wealth to try to get into our lives again. I didn’t have many reservations about punching him in the face about it either.”

Danny tightened his grip around Jason’s hand. He squeezed back in what he hoped was a reassuring manner.

“I turned to leave but at the mouth the alley was a van. And not one of those stereotypical white vans they warn you kidnappers use. No. No, it was my parents’ van. They slid open the door and and I felt like I couldn’t move. I looked down and Ellie was gone. They-” the words started getting choked up in his throat. His eyes becoming glassy as he fought with his next words.

“ They wanted to take her too. They said they still loved me even though I was different and that they could fix me.” His voice grew frantic and shaky. “They thought they could ‘fix me’ but that Ellie’s existence was unnatural. That it’d be better if they took her and tried to raise in a ‘normal’ environment, especially if she showed signs of being unnatural too!”

Danny turned his face into Jason’s shoulder, trying to fight back tears.

“ And I know they don’t actually think like that- that I need to be fixed, at least not anymore. But, the idea that they’d try to take her from me? Raise her better than I could? It tore me up inside. How could they want to raise her when the barely raised me and my sister? When my sister raised me more than they did? How could I trust them not to get her involved in experiments when they still store chemical samples the same fridge as our food? How could I trust them when I told them I didn’t want to be around Vlad and they still let him into our house? Because ‘We’ve know good ol’ Vladdie since college! Nothing to worry about with him!’ even though I told them I-!”

He paused trying to catch his breath. Jason lifted his other arm to wrap around the crying young man, tucking him under his chin. Danny shifted, now shuddering into his chest. Jason could feel the Pits ignite a fire in soul. His blood boiled and a voice cried out for blood in recompense for his friend’s pain.

‘What type of shitty parents-! No. Later’ he tried to reign in the voice. ‘Being here for him now is more important.’ He held the other even closer.

Finally, Danny calmed himself enough to continue, “ I know they don’t think that now. I know that they love me and, and Ellie too- and I still love them too and I know that they want to be better. But they just don’t get it. That there’s a lot of reasons I don’t want to be around them anymore. Reasons I don’t bring Ellie around if I can help it. Even though it was just a dream I couldn’t handle the idea that they- that anyone might try to take Ellie from me.”

Jason tilted his head slightly to press a soft, comforting, kiss on the top of Danny’s head. He rubbed small circles on his back and murmured gently in his ear,

“It’s okay Danny. It’s okay to be mad and upset and scared. From the sounds of it you have ever right to be. It’s okay for you to worry. I have a friend ya know. He’s a recovered addict, started getting extra serious about staying sober when his ex dropped a daughter off on his doorstep because he was worried at every turn that if he slipped up or relapsed someone would take her away. I know that it’s not the same but I think every parent is entitled to worrying over losing their kid. And it sounds like your own parents haven’t done you too many favors in minimizing the worry. But you don’t have to hold yourself back from being afraid. You’re allowed to be afraid, or upset or whatever else you might be feeling.”

He finally let go of Danny’s hand in order to hold him properly, once again shifting their positions. Now, they sat perpendicularly, with Danny partway into his lap, pressed against his chest. After a while Danny wiped his tears, whispering out a thanks to Jason and allowed himself to be comforted.

They sat in delicate silence until Jason finally worked up the nerve to speak.

“So you probably know who I am right?”

Danny lifted his head from Jason’s chest to give him a confused eyebrow raise. “Yeah I think I’d know whose lap I’m on right now?”

“Not like that,” Jason blushed. “ I mean since you asked about volunteering you must know who I am in a larger context right?”

“ You mean do I know you’re beloved Gotham celebrity and non-profit worker: Jason Todd-Wayne? Because I do. I did research this city before moving here, believe it or not. Actually I remember seeing a bunch of articles about how one of Gotham’s beloved sons had returned home with your picture around that time?”

Jason touched the back of his neck, glancing away in embarrassment.

“Uh yeah that, so you’ve probably hear about my- uuh, ‘resurrection’, huh?”

Danny’s expression sobered up. His eyes darkened and his voice got all quiet, likely due to the serious nature of the discussion.

“Yeah, I did. The media claimed you had been in a kidnapping turned terrorist attack slash hostage situation? And that you had managed to survive and were taken in by family who help you recover and reconnect with your dad once you were ready?” Danny recounted the cover story they’d given to the public. There was something in his tone that made Jason think there was more he wasn’t mentioning but it was likely all speculation or more sensitive details.

“Was-… was that what your dream was about?”

Jason bowed his head into Danny’s shoulder, not having it in him to say it to his face.

“Yeah,” he mumbled. “It was.”

“Oh.”

Now it was Danny’s turn to hold Jason tight, one arm one his back and the other coming up to pet his hair, gently pressing the larger man further into his shoulder. It felt like something cracked open inside him. Suddenly, words came tumbling out before he could even think about them.

“ I was back in that warehouse. Laying on the ground, injured. I could hear someone crying. And- *gulp* -and his laughter before the explosion. It was … so hot. And when I woke up I couldn’t stand the thought of being trapped inside. The same way I was trapped … during some of the worst moments of my life. And I know I’m not there anymore but I’m still terrified by the memory! Sometimes I still get scared the man who took me the first time will find me again and I just-!”

He choked on a sob as Danny held him even tighter, as if trying to melt him into his skin.

“I just hated feeling that way so much!” He whimpered.

“It’s okay Jay, I’m here big guy. You can let it out.”

And for the first time in a long while Jason allowed himself to cry freely, sobbing into his neighbor’s shoulder. Danny continued to stroke his hair, rocking gentle as one would when comforting a child. But maybe that sort of gentleness was what Jason needed.

Once he heard Jason’s sobs subside Danny took a deep breath and spoke.

“You know what?”

“What?” Jason asked lifting his head to gaze into Danny’s icy blue eyes.

“I’m kinda glad I ended up out here tonight. I mean the nightmare sucked but at least I got to be here for you.” He smiled softly, “I’m in your corner if you ever need me.”

Jason couldn’t help the soft smile that worked it’s way onto his face.

“Yeah, me too. I’ll be there if you ever need help, with anything: Ellie, Vlad, your parents, your groceries.”

Danny giggled at that last part, knowing Jason was sincere. With a sigh he rested his cheek on Jason’s chest. Jason reach down to hold his hand again and the two enjoyed the feeling of holding someone who held them back.

With a sigh, Danny lifted his gaze from their hands to Jason’s face. Jason gave him a closed-mouth smile, his eyes asking if something was wrong.

“It’s the 4th of July in a few days.” He stated.

“Yes, it is.” Jason said back.

“If it’s not too short notice, Ellie and I would love to have you over again. We were gonna have barbecue and ice cream and then come out here and see if we could catch the fireworks. She’d love it if you could join us, and … and, well I would too.”

Jason swore Danny was looking at him with the biggest, roundest, most earnest eyes he’d ever seen, save for his daughter’s.

“ I’ll be there.”

Danny flushed at his quick response.

“Don’t wanna check your schedule first?”

“Doesn’t matter. I didn’t have anything else planned so I’ll do my best to be there.” He made sure the shorter man’s eyes met his as he said his next words. “Besides, I like spending time with the two of you too.”

‘His ears are pink, he’s just adorable.’ He thought to himself as Danny seemed brighten in a shy glow. He shifted in Jason’s lap, probably getting ready to get up when he did something that cause Jason to blue screen.

Danny tilted his head up planting a quick peck on his cheek before squeaking out a “see you then” and fleeing back into his apartment, leaving a wide-eyed Jason on the floor of his fire escape.

Jason sat there stunned, before a furious blush over took his face and decided to hurry back into his own apartment. The voice in his head came back to give its routine comments: ‘His lips are so soft, the stuff of dreams’

He somehow managed to blush even more violently. ‘Damn it’ he thought, shoving his head under his pillow, unable to tell whether he actually wanted to dream about Danny’s lips or not. ‘It’s actually embarrassing how worked I’m getting over a fleeting kiss on the cheek from a friend.’

~

~Bzzt~ “Calling for back up! Firefly decided to start his annual firework show early this year!” ~Bzzt~ Signal called through the emergency comms.

Jason cursed his luck, of course Firefly would attack just as he got off work! Now he might be late to dinner! He sighed and tried to look on the bright-side: If they dealt with this now that meant it was less likely for any of the other rouges to try anything later. Then, the comm crackled back to life.

~Bzzt~ “I could have got him by now but he keeps lightin’ more shit on fire! By the time I get the first fires under control and punch him in the face, he’s started 20 more! Normally I’d be able to handle it, but there’s a lot of civilians around right now and fires take priority. I just need someone to help me keep the guy down long enough to make the arrest.” ~Bzzt~

Jason started ducking through alleys trying to get to his near safe house in order to grab his gear. Hey called back to Duke over the comms.

“Signal, heard! I just got off work. See if you can herd him towards the Alley. It’ll give the Red Hood an excuse to show up and beat the shit outa him while you make sure nothing actually gets damaged. I’m heading to the safe house near the Catherine Johnson Rec Center. Try to get him at least two blocks away!”

~Bzzt~ “Heard!” ~Bzzt~

Jason tossed the comm to the side and started strapping into his body armor. He started fastening his helmet when felt something in the air change. Then the comms buzzed to life once more.

~Bzzt~ “Hood, I’ve got Firefly coming your way! He’s heading up Delancy Ave.!” ~Bzzt~

Hood readied his grapple on shot.

“Good, keep him there! I’ll see you in 5, Narrows!”

~Bzzt~ “On it! I’ll be waiting Alley!” ~Bzzt~

Jason swung through the rooftops, heading in the direction of the fires that kept spontaneously appearing and subsequently being extinguished.

When he arrived Hood found Signal split between stopping fires and engaging Firefly in combat. The madman was so absorbed in antagonizing Signal that he hadn’t noticed Hood’s approach. Signal was handling him pretty well but being unable to focus solely on the villain lowered his efficiency. Jason’s mind wandered back to his friend, who had wanted to see him tonight, and decided he’d end this quickly.

You see for all his bulk and bullheadedness Jason was still a highly trained and intelligent individual. Maintaining the element of surprise he approached in the shadows silently looking down from his perch on an adjacent building. He made subtle gestures for Signal to move the guy into place, which he returned with the slightest of nods. Signal moved Firefly over to the side of the building closest to Jason’s position. Jason got ready took make use of his high ground, tapping into what he learned from Dick.

With a deep breath Jason runs up and launches himself into a triple forward somersault, building up power and momentum. In midair he took account of his bearings, aiming his feet at Firefly’s back.

Firefly goes down like he’s been hit by a semi.

“AND THATS WHY YOU STAY OUTA THE ALLEY FUCKER!” Jason shouts, crouching over the rouge who was quickly losing consciousness. Even though it’d been his plan to lure him here Jason was still protective of what was his. And Crime Alley? Crime Alley was his territory.

He stands up and gives Signal a celebratory high five.

“Nice going, ya tank! I thought he’d never go down!”

“No problem, Dayshift! Nice work handling him, you’d have gotten him eventually. I just sped up the process.”

“Thanks Hood, I ‘preciate it.”

“Soooo, you good here oorrr…?”

“Yeah, I’ve got it. Get outa here before the cops show up and arrest you,” Signal dismissed him.

Jason gave him a quick, two-finger salute before running off to change before he was late to dinner.

~

Jason arrives at the Nightingales’ red faced and out of breath. His hair is a windswept mess and his clothes slightly messy from his quick change. He knocks on the door desperately trying to tame his hair and adjust his t-shirt and jeans.

Jason feels a burst of cool air as the door opens and he’s greeted by a smiling Danny and a surprised Ellie. He smiles at the two but Danny speaks before he’s got the chance.

“ Surprise! It’s Jason!” He says with some mild jazz hands.

To which seem to Ellie explode in glee. Jason swears she’s vibrating with how fast she’s bouncing.

“The secret surprise guest was Mr. Jason! Awesome!”

And just like that there is small child attached to his leg. He looks down at her, then up at Danny, who’s holding in laughter, then back at Ellie. Then he bursts out laughing. He bends down down to scoop the young girl up into his arms and she lets out a small “whoa!” Jason follows Danny into the apartment, Ellie resting on his hip.

“It’s nice to see you to princess!”

“Mr. Jason! You’re not wearing any red!”

“Huh?”

He looks down to see the young girl scrutinizing his plain white shirt and blue jeans and looks questioningly at Danny. The young man takes pity on him and explains.

“Ellie really wanted to wear red, white and blue for the 4th of July,” gesturing to his own outfit: a pair of blue jeans, a white shirt with a logo for a band called Fifth World Raga, and a lightweight red flannel wit the sleeves rolled up to his elbows.

“That’s right! I have a white skirt and socks, and a blue top and tiara, and my cardigan, my sneakers and beanie are all red!” She showed off. Then she pointed at Jason.

“You’ve gotta white shirt and blue jeans but no red!” Then she gasped, “Oooooh! I have an idea! Wait here!” She said, scrambling off to her room.

Jason looked at Danny who smiled and shrugged helplessly in a “eh, whadda ya gonna do” sort a fashion. To which Jason just huffed in amusement.

That’s when Ellie rushed back in, holding something behind her back. She patted Jason’s thigh indicating for him to bend down, to which he obliged by crouching down to her level.

“Close your eyes!”

Jason shut his eyes. He felt something being placed around his neck and on his head.

“Open them!”

Jason found himself looking into a small purple hand held mirror. Ellie had placed a cheap red-beaded party necklace around his neck and a silver tiara with red gems on his head, one to match her own silver and blue one.

“I have lotsa tiaras so you can borrow this one so that you can have red! And you can even keep the necklace!”

Jason’s internal monologue nearly burst into tears. ‘She’s an angel! She’s bestowed such a wonderful gift Must. Protect. At All Costs!’

He heard Danny burst into laughter but focused his attention on the grinning girl in front of him.

“Thank you so much Princess! I love it! Just what I needed! I’m honored to receive such a thoughtful gift!

“Yeah Ellie, it looks great on him!” Danny chimed in between chuckles.

“That’s great daddy b’cause I found a white one for you! Now we can all match!”

Danny stopped laughing and Jason returned him a wicked grin.

“Yeah, your highness! We can all match! Besides, what’s a king without his crown!”

Danny sighed, placing the tiara on his head.

“Thanks Ell, I love it.”

“Your welcome daddy!”

“Alright, now go wash your hands for dinner!”

“Okay!”

And the girl scurried off to wash her hands. Jason grinned at the interaction. He waited till the girl was gone before turning to Danny.

“Looking good your highness,” he teased.

“Oh, hush you!” Danny flushed. “Come help me set the table. It’s not a traditional barbecue but I made some chili, hotdogs, veggie skewers, and some coleslaw. We’ve also got fruit salad and some soda pop in the fridge. Ellie wanted to do a homemade version of chili dogs and I had to insist on some fruits and veggies in there. Ancients knows she needs her nutrients! If you could be a dear and grab some plates off the drying rack that’d be great!”

“Of course, your highness! You had me at chili,” Jason said following Danny into the kitchen.

~

Later that evening after finishing up with dinner. Danny herded them all onto the fire escape with some frozen treats. Ellie had drumstick ice cream cone, Jason an ice cream bar, and Danny an orange popsicle.

“I don’t know if we’ll be able to see the fireworks from here but fingers crossed we do. Just don’t be too disappointed if you can’t see them alright Ell?” Danny told his daughter.

“It’s okay daddy! Even if I don’t see the fireworks I still have you and Mr. Jason and my ice cream!”

Jason and Danny looked at each other sharing the same thoughts: ‘She’s so precious!!!!’

Then the tell tale boom of fireworks started and the trio turned their attention to the sky. A streak of red danced across the sky before it burst into a shower of ruby colored sparks. Then came gold, and green and blue and white. One after another in a barrage of sound and color. And they were just able to see it above the end of the alley.

Ellie let out an awed “Whooooaaaa” as she watched the colors dance across the sky. She turned back to her dad tugging on his sleeve and point up at the sky. He chuckled, picking her up to give her a better view pointing at the sky with her saying, “Look at that one!”

It was near enough to make Jason’s own heart burst.

“Beautiful.”

“I know right!” Danny said, glancing back at him, talking about the fireworks. Silently, Jason thought about the way both of the Nightingales’ glossy black hair reflected the fireworks colors in their sheen.

Then Danny turned to hand his phone to Jason.

“Would you mind taking a picture of us?” He asked. “I never had many growing up and I want this to be something she’ll remember.” Looking back down at the child on his hip.

“Of course I can,” he said, taking the phone in his hand. “Smile!”

Jason looked down at the photo he snapped when he saw something that made his heart stall. It was a good photo, both Danny and Ellie smiling at the camera while the remains of a fireworks fell behind them in a shower of fading light. What stopped him in his tracks was the soft look on his own reflection in the window of the apartment staring at Danny and Ellie.

And he realized, ‘Oh. I like Danny’

And he doesn’t know when he zoned out and missed Danny taking his phone back, but he zones right back in when two arms are thrown over his shoulders and suddenly he’s in a selfie sandwich. Both Nightingales press close, Ellie throwing up a peace sign while Danny snaps the photo.

The two laugh at his startled face and he can’t help the laugh that bursts out of him.

“Hey! I wanna redo!”

~

That night Jason tosses and turns in bed while his brain replays images of Danny: his smile, his lips, his laugh, the way he licks an ice pop. If he hadn’t realized earlier then he definitely knows now.

Jason Todd has an undeniable, unequivocal crush on Daniel Nightingale.

~~~ I tried with that fight scene but I don’t have a lotta experience there. I know this is a fluff fic so sorry to angst you but it’s necessary for hurt/comfort. Have some “Jason accepts his feelings” to make up for it. Sorry if it’s too clunky or dialogue heavy. I’m open to constructive criticism so let me know what you think.

Fifth World Raga is a real band in the DCU their a rock band and their music is described as quote “spiritual in nature” so I feel like it fit Danny’s vibe.

[ghostsvacuumcleaner]

Hello! i was wondering if you could write me a req bc i saw your reqs r open (bc I ✨respectfully✨ suck booty at writing)

basically, reader made friends with Ghost while working together on deployment, and became friends, they hang out sometimes bc they live kinda close, blah blah blah. then, Ghost doesn't hear from reader in months (which isn't normal, bc they text like once a month, just to make sure one another is okay when they can). then, one day, in the middle of a meeting Ghost gets a call from an unfamiliar number and almost ignores it until he sees that the area code is the one reader lives in, so he decides to answer it. boom, guess what? the reader is in the hospital, sustained r/srs injuries, and is in need of emergency surgery, and the reader made Ghost the emergency contact (lets also say they traded dog tags bc fluff?)

homie gets all sad bc Reader might die and is in a mini coma, blah blah blah, realized he r in love w the reader, and uh

you can decide whether or not the reader dies and what happens next

i fr scream YIPEEE when i saw your req open, i adore your writing, like top tear, makes me cry but laugh and scream bc how are you so good?! srs, im so jelly of your writing! okay anyways, hope you have a lovely day, you dont have to do this is you dont want or if im jus a silly fucker and mis read and your reqs r closed or sum

Hellloooo! Thank you SO MUCH for the beautiful compliments and for this request <3 I loved it so much I started writing the day you sent it to me. But since it's very emotionally charged, it took me a little while to finish and I'm sorry bout that, and I rly hope you're still around and eager to read it!!! Well, there it is, my take on ur req, hope you like it.

Take me back (to the night we met) | Simon "Ghost" Riley x f!reader

✦Word count: 2.1k ✦ Pairing: Simon “Ghost” Riley xf!reader ✦Summary: Simon gets a call from the hospital saying that you are hospitalized, in a coma and in great life risk. ✦ TW and general warnings: sensitive topics, lots of angst, fluff though, death implications, open ending, sad af read at ur own risks cuz i'm crying in my room rn;

I had all and then most of you Some and now none of you Take me back to the night we met

“Johnny and I make our entrances fast. I clear the way, he goes front, three of you get in by the back and we surround the site to get enough space for the hostages to come out. Any questions?” Ghost asks sternly, as is the usual of his tone especially coming down to work. He was being brutally professional at the moment - if there was rather a sign of an existing Simon, it was gone the moment he got inside the briefing room. Silence follows for the next seconds while the crew seems to be pondering over what he said, analyzing the map over the big round table sticking to the center of the room.

As it is expected, no questions. He nods with his head assuming by the silence that they’re all understood.

“Our orders are to neutralize any individual we find on the site whose face doesn’t match with our hostages, which means we do it fast before they get the chance to call for reinforcements. We don’t wanna make a mess out of this.” Price then continues his own talking, marking X’s over the tactic map and giving the next orders to every one of them. It is when Gaz opens his mouth to say something, that Simon’s phone rings for the third time in a row. He curses mentally - he muted his phone the first time; now, it was vibrating in his pocket. Awkwardly, the vibration itself is heard by everyone in the room and they turn their eyes on him almost instantly.

“Hell.” He curses out in a low voice before shaking his head. “My apologies, Captain.” His voice tries its best not to come out too annoyed, but he fails and it does; despite the timing being inconvenient, no one seems to be bothered. Johnny furrows his brows in concern, and looks over at Price, who seems to have the same, perhaps even more intense, look on his face.

Ghost mentions to pull out and turn off his phone once again, but Price is quick to intervene.

“Riley.” He crosses his arms over his chest. “Third time in a row; seems like somethin’ serious, get out and pick up.” He states comprehensively.

Despite being slightly reluctant, Ghost agrees - it must be something serious. What, he couldn't come to imagine - but if for a moment in his life he had something close to a hunch, it was now, and it said he should take that call.

“Alright, one minute. Move on without me.” He nods and leaves the room, phone in hand and a worried sigh leaving his nostrils. When the door closes behind him and he walks a bit further down the hallway, he picks up.

“Yes?”

“Is this Lieutenant Simon Riley?” A feminine voice asks from the other side. Sounds in the background, beeps and small, muffled voices.

“Affirmative, who’s this?” He frowns.

“This is from the Special Forces Manchester Hospital, are you familiar with the name- hmm…” She seems to be taking a couple seconds to read, and continues saying your name. 

He freezes in place.

How long has it been since he last heard this name? How long has it been since you vanished like thin air, disappeared, stopped calling or answering? Busy. That’s what he thought. Busy with work, busy with anything. The two of you had always been two busy people, in a desperate need for time.

For a moment, in those torturous seconds of silence, Simon found himself praying to a God he wasn't even sure he believed in, that this nurse wouldn't tell him you’re dead.

“Yes.” It’s all he manages to say, with his eyes running down to the ground in a dead stare. Dead eyes. He gulps, after the despair in his chest makes him speak once again, “Why?”

“Well- sir, you’re her emergency number, we’re calling because we couldn’t manage any family members… She’s in a coma. She was severely injured in combat, and [...]”

His heart stops, like it never did before. He doesn't react, his eyes look around as if he's searching for something - as if searching for his own reaction hidden somewhere within that empty hallway. The weight of your dog tag around his neck seems to be suffocating him now. 

To his silence, the woman continues.

“[...] it’s… currently sort of impossible to predict her state within the next few days, she’s fighting but struggling lots; can you come over?” 

“Yes.” He sharply replies, immediately. His eyes are still on the ground as he closes his eyes, and nods. “I’ll be on my way, yes.” 

“Good.” She replies, and he turns off.

For a moment, he stops to breathe; Ghost wipes his hand over his mouth in a somewhat guilty expression, he should have reached for you. He should have reached you the instant he missed you, your calls. 

“Hell…” He shuts his eyes for a moment, his heart stings like he’s poisoned, it hurts - some sort of pain he swears to god, he probably never felt before. Not when he lost his training dog, nor when he lost friends before - maybe because there were always a lingering possibility between the two of you. It was nothing but a friendship, never had been - but every word, every phrase was full of underlines of sentiment, an immense desire to reveal his interior and spit out the fears he refused to speak about to anyone else.

It's the possibility that kills him now. Even after all this time, not for a second did you cease to exist in his troubled and saddened mind. Suppressed by all the worries and feelings he thought were more important than you.

Not for a moment did he stop thinking about that pleasant end to his career, the retirement he knew he deserved, a house at least isolated from the rest of the world with trees and streams, the snow falling when winter comes and the sun scorching the land. land when summer finally arrived. You, on the front porch. 

You.  You.

When the night was full of terrors And your eyes were filled with tears When you had not touched me yet Oh, take me back to the night we met

You were leaning back on the sofa, your legs stretched out by the small table that marked the space between you and the balcony railing of his apartment.

The rain fell calmly, some thunder, but few drops. The sound of them falling against the roofs of the houses below the level where you were was echoing in your ears, and he seemed busy drawing patterns among the heavy clouds that covered the sky. 

He gave up trying to find any stars in that rainy sky and found comfort in finding your eyes instead. They were already watching him, almost expecting him to say something, even though the silence between two of you usually speaks volumes more than words itself; you’ve never been good with them, much less him. 

Simon looked down at your dog tag, lying brightly on your bust exposed by the tank top you wore. 

“What do you want to do after retiring?” He asked, his voice calm, his eyes almost closed. He took your necklace between his fingers calmly, and watched your shiny name exposed on the icy metal.

“Gotta be honest with you, can’t see myself retiring.” You replied, with your usual brutal honesty - something he particularly always liked so much about you. “What about you?” 

You don’t mind him, you allow.

“Don’t know.” He was, too, brutally honest. “Seek fuckin’ forgiveness for my sins before I die and end up in hell, I suppose.” 

You laughed.

“Oh, fuck. Gonna die trying to find that, mate.” You admit, raising your eyebrows in another big sip of your beer. “We’re all going to hell… At least we’ll all party there together.” You sounded fun, and your eyes turned into little lines with the genuine smile you let out when noticed that he too laughed at your joke. 

“We’re partyin’? Tell me Johnny isn’t going…”

“He’s my first guest.” You laugh harder.

“Thought that’d be me.” 

“You hate parties.” You raised your eyebrows.

“I don’t hate you.”

You silently smiled and looked away. 

“Fair enough.”

When it came to the two of you, there was nothing but connotation.

You could spend hours in that apartment alone with him - and you did. Did plenty of times, and yet, among subtle touches and heartfelt conversations, the end would be the same. Not in his bed, not in yours: by the door, with a rueful look and smile on your face. 

With a held back hug you never gave, a held back kiss you never allowed and an uncertain goodbye before departing on a mission that could take your or his life.

There was a phone call, once.

He called you late in the night. He was drunk. Too drunk. 

“I’m scared.” His voice was low, fluttering, like those cold days he’d be waiting for his dad’s arrival in his bed, under the covers, terrified and alone. “I’m scared. Can- can I see you? Can I come over, please?” 

As you hugged him on the couch in your own apartment now - that huge, strong, self-sufficient man collapsing in your lap like a baby in need of comfort, your heart was never right about anything like it was right about loving him. In that moment you knew it, you were fucking lost, taken, desperately in love.

You departed; you gave him your dog tag, he gave you his. A memory, an attempt. Do not forget me, you said. Don’t you dare forget me if I die, Simon Riley.

“I didn’t.” 

He looks at you with regret. The devices that help you breathe keep him from seeing you fully, whole - but still behind all those hospital beeps and sounds, you're still as beautiful as the first time he saw you.

He wants to go back to the past. Reverse everything he did, redo it from scratch; the first time he saw you, the first time he felt his heart ache listening to you talk about another man, all the times he repressed his feelings and swore not to love you.

“I want to be with you.” He mutters, his eyes emptily stare down your almost lifeless hand resting over his. “After I retire. I want to be with you.” He says again, closing his eyes, shutting them tight like he’s trying his very best to repress the tears he wants so bad to let fall. 

“I fuckin’ need you- I- how did this happen, how did you…” He gasps as the clock ticks, low, the sound of the hands ringing like doomsday inside his head. Every second that passed was one less with you. There are twenty minutes left for you to enter that operating room, and maybe you’ll never leave it again.

His eyes water and his legs give out, he kneels beside the bed, his suppressed voice sounding like a low, painful moan. The cry of a child who lost everything he had; of a confused teenager who would become a soldier, cold, dead inside, incapable of love - who loved you. Who loves you. “I’m scared. I’m scared- I love you.” He’d mutter, praying to all known gods to not take you. Take anything, anything from me; anything but her.

When the doctors came into the room and hurriedly moved your gurney to the ward in a desperate attempt to get your heart working again with the transplant, Simon sat in the waiting room with his face buried in his hands, his legs trembling. and the false hope that you would come back.

That you’ll be on that front porch, resting ever so happily, a bottle of beer in your hand and the dogs running around. He will have gotten rid of the mask and the habit of wearing it and you’ll be happy. You’ll be happy. You’ll be alive.

“God, please.” He mutters. “You’ve taken so much from me, now please, not this.”

He stands up as the doctor calls his name, with his heart on his hand and regret flashing his face off, he just wants another minute with you, another second with you, enough seconds so he can tell you he love you - he had, for most of his life and now, and he will, for the rest of his days with or without you.

I don't know what I'm supposed to do Haunted by the ghost of you Oh, take me back to the night we met.

[xf-cases-solved]

S1E13: Beyond the Sea

Case: A young couple is kidnapped in North Carolina, and the authorities have five days to find them before they're murdered. Unfortunately, they have no leads, except for the testimony of Luther Lee Boggs—a serial killer Mulder put behind bars years ago—who is claiming to have psychic knowledge that will lead them to the missing children. In some serious turning of the tables, Mulder is skeptical of Boggs' claims, whereas Scully—whose father just died, and who is desperate for just one more message from him to know that they didn't part on bad terms—finds herself believing Boggs, much to her chagrin. After Mulder is shot, Scully is on her own to work with Boggs, leading to some sexy fucking "Silence of the Lambs" -esque scenes that make this episode not just a top tier s1 episode, but a top tier episode of all time. Mulder tears up his New York Knicks shirt (he probably has like seventeen tho, so it's okay), Scully is scared to believe, and Brad Dourif puts his entire goddamn pussy into playing Luther Boggs. A+++, fam.

Does someone die in the cold open: Yes! But it wasn't a crime. Scully gets the dreaded "middle of the night phone call" and learns that her father just died. (Even tho she just saw him sitting in her armchair across the room. Say what???) 

Does Mulder present a slideshow: No. 

Does the evidence survive the investigation: This is another where it depends on what you mean by evidence. Evidence of the actual, literal crime? Yes, that actually worked out like how normal police work is meant to go if you're good at your job. Evidence of Boggs' psychic abilities, however? Unfortunately, proof of those went with him to the gas chamber. 

Whodunit: Lucas Henry, who is either Boggs' accomplice, or somebody Boggs keeps having psychic visions of. It's up to you to decide.

Convictions: Lucas Henry would have been convicted if he hadn't crashed through several floors and fell on his face directly onto some concrete, so we'll give it to 'em.

Did they solve it: While the supernatural element remains a mystery, the crime itself is solved. This one is a resounding yes!

[how do i determine if a case is solved? check the scale here: x]

THIS EPISODE IS SPONSORED BY: Confusing and upsetting your loved ones by appearing to them after your death. Look, we all die—it's a fact of life!—but just because you're dead doesn't mean you have to be dull. When accidents strike, illnesses rage, or the clock has simply run out, keep the fun going by confusing and upsetting your loved ones by appearing to them after your death. By keeping the excitement of living alive by causing trauma to those closest to you as they mourn your loss, you're guaranteeing your time in the afterlife is off to a great start!

*Confusing and upsetting your loved ones by appearing to them after your death is especially recommended for those with loved ones who are particularly skeptical, or who are looking for answers to ambiguities left behind after your departure.

Try it today! Or, well, when you die, we mean. Which might be today!

***

General Total Stats:

(green means stat has changed since last ep; red means new stat added to list)

Total Cases *Definitively* Solved So Far: 6 (holy shit, three in a row?? unprecedented!)

Total Number of "Mulder/Scully, it's me" phone calls: 1

Total Number of Times Scully Has Conveniently Not Seen Something Crucial: 4 (Mulder was actually the one who was out of the room whenever Boggs said something that resonated with Scully)

Total Number of Times Mulder Has Been in Mortal Danger: 5 (pew pew) 

Total Number of Times Scully Has Been in Mortal Danger: 3 ½ (half point bc she should have died, but she had that warning from Boggs, so it was kind of a toss up) 

Total Number of Sexually Charged, Uncomfortably intimate, and/or Flirty Moments Between Friendly Coworkers: 8 (i changed the stat to add in "uncomfortably intimate" bc especially in these first few seasons, a lot of the MSR moments are more like... buddy, i get that you're going through it, but that is your coworker, why are you holding them so gently with so much love in your eyes? anyway, Mulder cupping her face in the beginning, and Mulder putting his hand on her gigantic 90s pant suit shoulder pad at the end are the ones i'm counting)

Total Number of Autopsies Scully Has Performed On Screen: 1

Total Number of Times Scully Plays Doctor: 1

Total Number of Times Mulder Talks to an Informant: 5 

Total Number of Times People Making Out in a Car are Hurt or Killed: 1 (new stat!)

Total Number of Nosebleeds: 4

Total Number of Times Someone Says "Trust No One": 1 

Total Number of Times Someone Says "I Want to Believe": 2 (new stat! first one was actually in that snore fest "Conduit," but i didn't want to go back and add it since i just considered making it a stat now)

Total Number of Cigarettes Cigarette Smoking Man Has Smoked: 2

Total Number of Maggie Scully sightings: 1 (new stat!)

Total Number of Alex Krycek Sightings: 0 :(

Total Number of Times I Had to Look Up What State the Episode Takes Place in Even Though I Literally Just Watched It: 3 ½

Total Number of Times I Had to Look at an Episode's Wikipedia Page to Fill This Out Because It Was Fucking Confusing and/or Too Boring for Me to Pay Attention: 2 (we stan Beyond the mother fucking Sea)

[mkkm142]

One year, Sirius decides to teach himself to knit because he wants to make Remus a cozy jumper for Christmas. He drags James to the yarn shop and spends hours feeling every skein of yarn, looking for the softest wool in the perfect colors to make Moony’s eyes pop. He sneaks down to the common room after everyone is asleep for weeks, so Remus doesn’t catch him working on it. He gets frustrated keeping track of his knits and purls, his stitches never add up right, and when he can’t figure out how to cable he’s ready to tear the whole thing apart. James has come down to the common room on multiple occasions to find Sirius completely wrapped up in yarn, tangles and knots every where, and has had to help him sort it out. Sirius has had to rip back rows at least 3 times because he keeps dropping stitches. It’s so much harder than he thought and sometimes he just wants to give up. But he never does bc this will be the best surprise for Moony and he can’t stop picturing his face Christmas morning.

Finally Christmas has arrived and Sirius is quivering with excitement, shoving the box in Remus’ hands. Remus warily opens the box, never knowing what to expect from Sirius, when he pulls out the most crooked jumper he’s ever seen. He didn’t even know jumpers could be crooked, but the arms are somehow lopsided, one side is longer than the other, there are holes where stitches have been dropped, and it goes from wide to narrow, back to even wider.

But it’s the most beautiful array of blues, reminding him of a clear night sky. It’s the softest wool he’s ever felt, and after putting it on at Sirius’ insistence, he discovers how warm and cozy it is. Sirius is bouncing up and down, the biggest grin on his face, asking Moony if he likes it. Remus laughs scooping Padfoot up into a cheerful hug, whispering in his ear it’s the most perfect jumper he’s ever seen. Which he means with every fiber of his being. No one has ever put such thought and effort into a gift for him before. Sirius blushes with pleasure and exclaims he’s going to knit Remus hundreds of jumpers.

He stays true to his word, showering Remus with more jumpers than he knows what to do with. Over time, Sirius improves his skill. His stitches are even, his rows are straight, and the arms are symmetrical. He learns so many patterns and finds the most beautiful colors. Remus loves each and every jumper Sirius presents him, knowing how much time and effort and care Padfoot put into them. However, out of all the beautiful jumpers he’s received over the years, when he just wants to be cozy and curled up with a good book, Remus always chooses that first ridiculous crooked jumper. He’ll always favor the precious gift, if just to remember that moment and the look of pure joy radiating from the otherwise troubled, yet beautiful boy who captured his heart.

[annasinterests]

don't look at me like that unless you mean it

so i get out of bed ♫ put on my shoes and in my head

|| series masterlist || main masterlist ||

a/n: going back and revising can either be the best or worst thing in the world i stg lmao. i'm honestly surprised with how quick i got this one out?? anyway, thank you all for the likes and reblogs so far on this series! i hope you're all enjoying where the story is going!! if you have any questions, comments, or even suggestions (even if its like grammatical stuff), please let me know bc i'd love to hear some feedback <3

word count: 4.1k (where da freak did that come from?!)

pairings: joel miller x f!reader

warnings & tags: minors dni, angst, reader midkey being a little shit, reader also being a mom, swearing, lil fluff here n there, pining, looming threats — please tell me if i missed anything!

Winter turned to spring.

Spring turned to summer.

And Ellie found her purpose again.

She volunteered to help all around Jackson when she wasn’t out on patrol with you or Joel, going above and beyond what was expected of her. At least twice a month, the three of you would go over to Tommy and Maria’s for family night, consisting of food and games for a couple hours. Sometimes even Dina, her now-official girlfriend, and Jesse joined– At Ellie’s request, of course.

You tried your best to have meals as a family, taking the time to share details of the day or week, or simply just enjoying each other's presence in silence. Ellie had made it a point to spend time with you and Joel separately once a week outside of work, whether it’d be having lunch, going for a walk, or watching a movie together.

It was like life breathed into her, and your house felt like home again.

Whenever you’d get lucky enough to all be home at the same time, the three of you would be in the living room together but be occupied with your respective interests. Joel would be on the couch with a guitar and rag in hand, delicately cleaning and polishing the instrument, while Ellie sat on the window seat across the room with her notebook and pencil. You’d be curled up on your reading chair between them with your nose in a book while cradling either a mug of coffee or tea. Sometimes the quiet would be broken by Ellie peering up from her art and seriously prompting Joel with a question that was so obviously from her book of puns and you'd watch as she eagerly waited for him to take the bait. You couldn't tell what was better, when Ellie would make herself crack up, or watch Joel shake his head in disbelief with a grin on his face. The best, though, was when Joel would answer with the punchline and laugh as he watched Ellie's face fall with contempt.

Things had just fallen back into place.

The general rule in Jackson was that everything had a set schedule and was planned in advance, no matter how big or minuscule it was. So when Maria had called in for all patrol, leaders, and committee members to meet at first light this morning, you knew it had to be something important.

On your walk over to town hall, you took the extra time to appreciate your surroundings. The sun shined a bit brighter, and the air felt fresher. The trees were regaining their green leaves in full, and weeds sprouted in the cracks of the streets and sidewalks. You waved to fellow settlers sitting on their porches and drinking their morning cups of coffee, many of whom you’d come to know as good friends.

The room filled up quickly and the air hummed with anticipation and light conversation. People arranged themselves according to their role in Jackson, but you only paid attention to the groups you belonged to: The committee, who sat before the podium, and patrol, who lingered near the back. And it just so happened that you were administration duty this week, so you took your seat in the front row. You scanned over your shoulder for Joel and spotted him off in the corner with Tommy, in what seemed like typical brotherly conversation. The two faced each other, Tommy talking passionately about something while Joel shook his head in annoyance, which slowly turned to reluctant nods and a hand up in defeat. You wondered what he’d been going on about.

Your attention was drawn back to the podium by the tapping sound of the microphone that was amplified through the speakers, Maria's favorite way of commanding the room's attention. But when you looked at her, she wasn’t her typical self. In all meetings, planned or not, she always exuded an unmatched confidence and possessed a let's-get-to-business attitude. That she wasn’t phased by the sheer amount of responsibility that rested on her shoulders, being the backbone of Jackson.

But now, something was off. She was bothered, and it showed. Her hands that normally folded in front of her now gripped the sides of the podium with such a strain that you could see her knuckles turning white and her thumb repeatedly scratching at the wood. Her eyes anxiously darted around the room, looking at all the bodies staring back at her, but not really seeing them.

"Thank you all for being here on such short notice," she tried to mask her concern with a bright smile, "I wanted to bring you all together to discuss an important development that has come to our attention."

She paused for a moment, as if to reel in everyone's attention moreso, though it was probably more for herself. You tilted your head and squinted at her as she nervously peered around again, wondering what the hell had gotten into her.

"Recently, some of our patrol has been encountering a group little ways beyond our walls,” she allowed her words to sink in, “but they’re not like our usuals– they’re more organized. Dangerous.”

And? Jackson’s dealt with savagery before, what’s so different now? Maria glanced at you briefly, as if she heard your thoughts.

“They pose a significant threat to us. One greater than we’ve ever seen, and one that we cannot underestimate.”

Without missing a beat, you looked over your shoulder between the sea of people that were exchanging uneasy looks and words for Joel, finding his eyes on you. He shared the same apprehensive expression as you did, with steady eyes and scrunched brows.

Maria held up her hand to quiet the murmur that had rippled through the room before speaking again, but you drowned out her words. The most you were able to put together was something about unsettling information, the community being built on unity and resilience, and stricter security measures.

For all the times you came across people, how many of them had been the company that played a hand in this? How many times had you walked away from someone who harbored ill intentions? How many times had you unwittingly brushed shoulders with death at the hands of these people?

You sat still as ever, eyes locked in front of you, but your body was beginning to shut down as more thoughts crammed themselves into your head. Your heart rate picked up, being able to feel the pulse just about everywhere, and your vision began to blur in and out.

Your hand ghosted over the void in your stomach. You could handle being out there. Fuck, you could come to terms even getting caught out there. But it made your blood run cold knowing that Joel was out there facing those same risks as you, and– fuck– even Ellie too.

One question still lingered: What was it about this group that set them apart from the rest?

“Hey sweetheart-” you were startled by the sudden hand on your knee, jerking your head to the left to look at the woman next to you, Charlotte. She frowned at you, “Are you alright?”

“I’m-” you shook your head to a nod, “I’m- Yes. I am.” She didn’t look convinced, but didn’t pry either. Instead, she gently placed her hand on top of yours.

You liked Charlotte, and not just because you had to for the sake of the committee, because God, there were quite a few that fell under that obligation. You actually respected her. She was sweet and southern as they made them, and everything she did was always handled with grace and poise. You’d also be lying to yourself if you said you weren’t slightly envious of her. To be soft and benevolent well after the end of the world? You could only wish to be those things.

“Well, if it’s alright with you, I could really use Ellie’s help at the school today.” She took her free hand and gestured about the room, “Just ‘ought to prep some things in light of all.. this.”

You placed your hand on top of hers, "Ellie would love to."

“And have Dina go too,” she gave a warm smile and squeezed your shoulder as she stood. She leaned down as if she was confessing a secret, sending you a wink. “I’ve always liked those two.”

It was when she walked away that you noticed the meeting had ended. People were standing clustered in groups, and you were unable to decipher what each conversation had really been about as you were preoccupied with finding Joel before heading out.

He’d still been near the back with Tommy and other patrolmen Samson, Milo, and- oh, great- Fitz.

You’d been paired up with Fitz on several occasions, only getting to know him well enough to stand him for an entire shift, but still struggled to do so. He was a patrol leader around your age, but still acted like he was in his twenties, in the sense of that he wanted to fuck every woman available in Jackson. Every time you’d turn him down, he’d have another girl on his arm the week after, and then a different one after that. And just when you thought he’d given up, he made his rounds back to you in hopes that you’d give him a chance to get in your pants.

Tommy's back had been to you, the four men around him listening to whatever story he'd been telling. You gently patted his shoulder and you stepped beside him so as not to spook him, to which he pulled you in for a side hug/cheek kiss combo and quick good mornin' as he carried on his story. Joel had been on the end of the semi-circle of men, leaving you a spot to settle in next to him. When Tommy got to the height of the tale, the three men erupted in laughter, Joel only shaking his head with a curled lip.

In a moment of reprieve, Fitz took the opportunity to draw the attention to you with a mischievous grin.

“Miler, how’s it that you’ve got the most beautiful woman in Jackson livin’ under the same roof as you, and yet you won’t even claim her?”

Fitz’s tongue poked his cheek as Joel’s jaw tightened at the slight. You caught Tommy giving Joel a smug look before looking down at his feet to hide it. He’d teased Joel for the same thing before, but never as direct or harsh, and definitely not in front of other people. Fitz redirected back to you, “Listen, if he won’t touch ya', I’d be happy to-”

“Who said he didn’t?”

You wanted to punch yourself in the throat immediately, but the wild look on Joel’s face made the lie so fucking worth it. You kept the smirk on your face and stared at Fitz until he grew uncomfortable enough to break contact, ignoring the wide eyed expressions from the rest of them.

“You could probably take some pointers, honestly.” You jerked your thumb at Joel.

Joel continued to burn holes into your head as Tommy, Milo, and Samson tried to stifle their laughter. Fitz rolled his eyes as a redness spread on his cheeks, mumbling an insult and withdrawing himself from the group. You smiled and bit your lip as you watched him walk away, letting out an airy laugh once he was out of sight.

“So, when were you guys gonna-” You and Joel both gestured defensively at Tommy as excuses fell out of your mouths by the second.

“No! We’re not-” you glanced at Joel quickly. “No. That was just to get Fitz to quit his shit.”

Knowing Fritz’s reputation, Tommy didn’t require anymore persuasion, saving you from having to over-explain yourself and wind up looking like a fool in the process. “Well.. we're havin' a thing at the Bison on Friday. Why don't you come down?"

You raised an eyebrow at him, looking at Joel for confirmation if you heard him correctly. “Shouldn’t we.. I don’t know, not be having a thing? Especially after what Maria just said?”

Tommy nodded his head and sighed, knowing exactly that’s what the invitation sounded like. “It’s not- It’s supposed to be a.. morale booster, fuckin’ whatever– it's Maria’s idea, not mine. I'm just supposed to get the word out."

While it felt a little odd, you could understand why she wanted to do it. "I don't know, Tommy, I-"

"Great! See y'all there!" Tommy smirked as he looked between you and Joel and began to walk away. You turned to Joel with disbelief, but he was unphased, conveying how Tommy had roped him into this way before you walked over.

As the room emptied out, you all took it as your cue to leave and begin tending to your responsibilities for the day. Joel had disappeared too quickly for your liking, but you didn’t have the time to sit and chat with him either.

You stopped home to find Ellie, Dina, and Jesse in the kitchen eating breakfast together, chuckling at the idea of the other two essentially being your adoptive children as well for how much they were over.

Ellie offered you a strawberry off her plate and inquired about the meeting with genuine curiosity. Carefully, you explained to them the importance of being aware of their surroundings for the next couple of weeks, and to not stay out past curfew no matter where they were. Meaning if they needed to crash at your house for the night, so be it, and so on and so forth. They found your propositions to be odd, understandably as you didn’t give the proper context as to why, but nonetheless they didn’t question you.

"So.. are you going to the thing on Friday?" Jesse’s inquiry took you by surprise.

"How do you know about the thing on Friday?" You asked like a mother asking her child about something they weren't supposed to know about.

"I ran into Fitz before I got here.”

You rolled your eyes. Fuckin’ Fitz. Of course he’s going. You shifted your weight against the counter, crossing your arms. "Yeah, I am. Why?"

"'Cause we were gonna sneak in if you weren't." Dina mumbled behind her glass of juice.

You tittered at her honesty, your eyebrows now furrowed together. "And why would you guys have to sneak in?"

"Because Fitz said that Uncle Tommy said it was only for adults? Like, older than us." Ellie gestured to the other two and shot you a look of confusion, like you were already supposed to know.

Your expression stayed the same, but your eyes shifted around the room as you thought about the new fact she presented you.

Huh. Only for adults.

Your mouth closed and curled up. It was on brand for Tommy to not have added that important piece of information.

Ellie watched as the gears turned in your head, but you didn't give her the opportunity to pick at your brain as you changed the subject to Charlotte's request.

“Well, Ms. Charlotte needs you two to help her today.” You pointed your fingers at the girls, who shared an excitement to be with the kids. Keeping one finger on them, you averted the other to Jesse. “And you need to get ready to head out, Mr. Almost-Patrol-Leader.”

The kids rushed to clean up their dishes and grab their bags to get to it. Before running out the door, they each gave you their own special way of saying goodbye.

“Thanks for letting me eat your food!”

“See you later, love you!

“Love you more than Ellie does!”

You beamed at the door after it closed.

For some reason, you thought Joel would've been home. You imagined that if he had been present for the conversation, he definitely would've dropped a sarcastic remark somewhere to illustrate his dismay for Fitz or the party. But he wasn't, and it made you feel off.

You were still leaning against the counter in deep thought, feeling.. oddly familiar in the spot. It had only been months ago when you stood here, tea in hand, sharing a.. moment.. with Joel. You stared at the empty space where he had left the jar of honey that morning, a memory of yet another stolen moment.

The silence overwhelmingly contrasted with the energetic scene you were just part of, forcing you to realize just how empty the house was.

You shook your head, rousing yourself from your thoughts.

Go. Go out and get some work done.

You spent the rest of the afternoon and evening walking through the bustling streets of Jackson, checking in with other leaders and taking note of their preparations for the coming weeks to report back to Maria. You wanted to gather as much information as possible to keep her adequately informed, but it also gave you a reason to push Joel far away from your thoughts.

Through your interactions, you couldn't help but admire the unity and spirit of Jackson. The sense of vigilance permeated the community, there was a collective understanding that every measure mattered in ensuring the safety of everyone. From rigorous training sessions led by guardsmen, sharpening their combat skills and marksmanship, to the meticulous maintenance of weapons and ammunition, no detail was overlooked.

Before returning to the town hall, you brought yourself to the stables. It sat on a hill that overlooked the town with no other buildings near it, making it the perfect getaway when you needed a break from all the noise.

It'd been empty with the exception of a handful of horses in their stalls. In relaxed movements, you swiftly picked up a bucket and flipped it upside down as a makeshift seat, plopping yourself down on it. Hues of red and orange brushed across the sky, the sun sitting just over the top of a mountain far out in the distance. You sat quietly, listening to the buzzing and ticks of nature.

"Can't beat that view." A gentle voice came from behind you, registering as Joel.

The sound of his boots on the floor let you know he approached your side, shoving his hands into his pockets. You nodded in agreement, not seeing the use for words in the moment. Neither one of you looked or even glanced at each other, focusing your attention to the sunset in front of you. The sun descended behind the mountain, dragging the bold colors with it and allowing new hues of blue and purple to replace it. The town lights began to come on, flickering up and down the streets. A soft yellow glow illuminated the stables.

You hadn't seen him all day after the meeting, but now here he was, joining you in your small time of solace. Honestly, you didn't expect him to be there. If he had gone out for his shift around noon, he wasn't supposed to be back for another few hours. You thought that maybe Tommy switched his shift last minute, or that you just remembered his schedule wrong for the week. Either way, you weren't going to poke and prod. Your thoughts had pivoted back to this morning.

“Do you think she’s not telling us something?”

He furrowed his eyebrows momentarily before relaxing. “Maybe.”

You stood up and slid the bucket off to the side, beginning to pace at the edge where the wood met the grass. Joel watched as you brought your hands to your hips and your eyes stared down at your feet, placing themselves one in front of the other as if they threatened to trip over thin air.

You couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something more to this. It all felt so sinister. You wanted to be mad at yourself– How could you have gone so long without realizing that there’d been people out there watching, judging, and assessing every move? But also, how could you have known? What were the signs you were supposed to be looking for?

“People hide things when they’re scared.”

His words stopped your pace, and fuck if they hit a little too close to home. You faced him with a perplexed expression etched on your face and a light desperation in your voice. “But why is she scared?”

You weren’t looking for a legitimate answer, you just wanted him to see where your train of thought was at. You searched his eyes in hopes that he shared the same doubts. That something bigger was in the picture.

“Tommy thinks they’re tracking us on patrol.” He shrugged his shoulders again, his eyes first glancing down at the ground before landing on you. He shifted his weight to his one foot almost cautiously. "Seems that way, I guess."

Your breath hitched in the back of your throat as you tried to take deep breaths. Your hands ran through your hair to stimulate the light-headed feeling that was spreading quickly. No fucking way.

“How long?”

Your eyebrows were knitted together and your eyes narrowed at Joel's. He brought his hands to his hips and turned himself towards Jackson, staring off into the distance, where somewhere between all those mountains, rivers, and forests, danger lurked. The weight of silence hung heavy in the air, a tangible presence that seemed to amplify the gravity of the situation.

“Been runnin’ into the same people for a couple months, at least.”

Months. They had fucking months on you. And only now had Jackson realized it. Yet, Joel seemed indifferent in conveying this to you. You felt that all the air had been knocked out of your lungs, and you turned away, dragging a hand down your mouth to cover your mouth, muffling an oh my fucking god. You reverted back to how you thought about how blissfully unaware you were about all the times they could’ve taken or killed you, or Joel, or– you whipped around to him.

“She cannot go on patrol anymore.” He looked at you with a somber expression, his gaze growing with concern as the lines on his forehead deepened. You didn’t notice as he drew closer to you as you began to think of the worst case scenarios. “I’m sorry, Joel- But she can’t. God forbid something-”

You’d been talking a million miles a minute and staring right into his chest, yet didn’t see his hands coming up to cradle your face and make you look up at him. In his eyes, you saw his worry as you lost yourself in your own head. He saw how troubling you found the entire matter to be, and knew that it would eat at you until it was put to rest.

“Please, don’t let her.” Your hands wrapped over top of his as your voice broke in a final plea.

His hands were rough and calloused, yet when they held you, you’d think that he’d held everything in life this softly. His thumbs ran over your cheekbones, eyes flickering between your own. If the circumstances were different, maybe you’d take your chance and crash into him. But when he looked at you like this? Man, it didn’t get much better than that.

“Yes ma’am.”

In his response that probably should’ve made either of you withdraw, neither of you did. His eyes quickly glanced down at your mouth, and you involuntarily did the same to him. You said his name, but it was barely audible. He brought his hand to the back of your hand and guided you into his chest, wrapping his arm around you.

“Hey,” he cooed, “we’re gonna be okay.”

His words had a profound effect on you. Those simple words said with such an assurance and sincerity that you so desperately wanted to believe him without question. It echoed in your head.

We're gonna be okay.

You don't know when, but at some point over all the years with Joel, it became something more than just surviving together. It became that you were unofficially his, and he was unofficially yours, with no room for anyone but Ellie inbetween. But still, you found yourself wondering if it would ever be more than just that. If he ever felt the same pull, the magnetic force that constantly drew you towards him.

You couldn't help but wonder if he truly understood the depth of your own feelings. If he grasped the significance of these moments that left your heart racing. Did he know how often you spent thinking about him, replaying conversations in your mind, searching for hidden meaning in every word and gesture like you were right now?

You buried your chest into his chest and nodded, a silent acknowledgement at best, allowing his words to sink in for what they were worth.

"Yeah, we're gonna be okay."

You didn't believe yourself for a second.

[yfmconfessions2]

THE ANON PUFF is back with more shit!!! This time with other band members too!

-Puff devours whole chocolate bars like theyre small candies and then is suprised that hes nauseous afterwards

-Puff gets cold SO EASILY its crazy, he hates taking cold showers

-If you ask Puff to give you anything (for example some water) he will say "no" then immediately get up and get you the thing you asked for bc he thinks its hilarious

-Benatar doesnt go to clubs as much as the other band members, so when theyre out he has self care nights and then takes care of 3 drunk asses when they get back to the bus.

- Puff doesnt have high alcohol tolerance. Like he takes two shots and is already saying the most fucked up, slurred stuff you can imagine.

-They got canceled on twitter multiple times for saying slurs (besides Benatar)

-Talking about getting canceled, Benatar makes sure they dont start fights out of nowhere with random people on any social medias

-Deejay has the best immune system out of the whole band. Like everyone can be sick in their beds and he's just taking care of them like a mama.

-Axel hangs out with Shitty G every chance he gets bc he reminds him of his dad with the way he speaks and stuff

-They all have been to jail at least once.

-Puff had shitty grades even though he could have had at least decent ones, he was just too lazy to study.

-Deejay and Benatar do most of the work for the band (editing and stuff) but once in a full moon, Puff helps out and if he DOES, he literally pulls 4 all nighters in a row to get all of it done.

-Benatar bought all of the band members squishmallows for the 1 year anniversary of their band and they all matched. Puff and Axel said it was dumb as hell, but they sleep with them till this day. Deejay liked it from the beginning.

-Puff once made slimes as a kid, spilled the glue he was using all over his grandmas carpet and literally threw the carper out and said that someone stole it.

-Puff loves building legos, his room at his grandmas house is filled with legos.

-Puff uses the shittiest cologne in the world and says that he smells great.

-They have no shame. Like when theyre in public they can have a contest who will scream the most foul things imaginable and then when everyone stares at them they all just giggle their asses off.

ANDDD THATS ALL!

OMOMGOMGOMGOMG PUFF ANON YAYYYAYAYA

THE SECOND ONE IS SO ME

DEEJAY IS 100% THE MOM FRIEND I GUARANFUCKINGTEE

BENATAR LOVES SQUISHMALLOWS I KNOW IT RAY TOLD ME HE TOLD ME

ONE TIME WHEN PUFF WAS A KID, HIS GRANDMA GAVE HIM THE WHOLE BAG OF CHIPS AND TOLD HIM NOT TO EAT THEM ALL, AND PUFF ACCIDENTALLY ATE THEM ALL. HIS EXCUSE WAS "A RAT. A GIANT RAT BURST THROUGH THE DOOR, SLAPPED THE BAG OUT OF MY HAND, ATE ALL THE CHIPS, AND ESCAPED OUT THE WINDOW. ...and also stole an extra cookie on the way out."

[dweetwise]

[Riconti] Pudding out

Just a silly little thing I wrote bc I love domestic riconti <3 Rated G | 900 words | ao3 link

Ace stared at the colorful spinning wheels on the screen with single-minded focus.

The room was filled with the chiming music of the online casino, the laptop’s speakers occasionally crackling with the volume Ace had set the game to. He was hunched over in his seat and waiting with bated breath for his next win. 

There was a sad sound effect to signal no win and Ace barely even registered clicking the auto-spin button again. He only needed one more of those stupid diamonds, and then he'd get to activate the multiplier again—

Ace jumped as a hand shot out from behind him and a small item thudded onto the kitchen table in front of him.

"Oh, hey!" Ace greeted and immediately turned the volume down. "I didn't even hear you get home."

Probably because he'd been engrossed in this game for almost an hour. The obnoxious music had apparently been enough to mask the sound of Felix’s sedan pulling up in the driveway.

Felix grunted and turned back to the kitchen counter, plucking items out of a supermarket bag rather aggressively. Ace didn’t blame him; after a long day at the office, grocery shopping was far from anyone’s favorite way to spend their night off.

Ace went back to inspect the item Felix had dumped in front of him. It was a small plastic container and the side said salted caramel—ah, some kind of dessert.

"Aww, thanks!" Ace smiled at Felix's back and immediately grabbed the complementary little wooden spoon glued to the tin. He turned the package over—

Oh. It was a salted caramel protein pudding.

"Uh." Ace paused. "Are you sure this wasn't for you?"

Felix froze from unpacking the bags. When he turned to look at Ace, he was half-pouting, half-glaring. Ace racked his brain; it was a Wednesday, which was Felix's gym day. His hair was still damp so he must have showered after his workout, yet his mood was absolutely sour…

"I bought the wrong flavor," Felix said miserably. "A stupid clerk was standing in the yogurt section, and I tried to wait, but the store was crowded and I wanted to go home. But when I asked him to move, he gave me about ten centimeters of space, so I went to grab the chocolate flavor that I always get, but I couldn’t see properly because that asshole was still in the way. And when I realized I didn't get the right pudding he'd already gone back to hogging the whole fridge, and I was tired and sweaty and the frozen foods were melting and I didn't…"

Felix deflated after his little rant, his shoulders slumping as he looked at the floor with a frown.

"You didn't wanna bother him a second time?" Ace guessed. 

He scooped out a spoonful of the pudding, which, surprisingly, didn’t taste too bad. Then again, Ace wasn't usually picky about food—hence why Felix always dumped his unwanted veggies and other foods onto Ace's plate.

"I should have," Felix said. He glared at the offending pudding. "I hate salted caramel, but it's almost the same color as the chocolate one. What a stupid design choice—and who the hell organizes a shelf in the middle of the post-work rush hour? He wasn't even stocking it, just straightening the rows like some kind of…of protein-hating psychopath!"

Ace chuckled at Felix's fuming around another spoonful of artificial salted caramel. He knew from experience that there was little that got under the normally quiet architect’s skin like a disruption to his routines—no matter how minor.

"Well, I for one appreciate you braving the rush-hour supermarket and reaping the fruits of your little mishap. Though I've gotta say, I usually prefer my desserts with actual sugar," Ace said.

"I'm glad one of us finds it edible," Felix huffed.

"But from what I understand… You missed out on your post-workout snack, didn’t you?" Ace said, hazarding a guess at the root of the problem.

Felix frowned. "Yes. Because of that one—"

"Yes, yes, because of some minimum-wage sap who was unfortunate to come between you and your favorite pudding." Ace stood up, coming to stand before Felix and placing a hand on his chest. "Anyway, here's my proposal: you're clearly a little hangry, so why don't you leave the grocery unpacking to me, grab some Michelin-star spaghetti from the fridge—yes, that I cooked for my beautiful boyfriend to enjoy after his long day, hold your applause—and find something on TV that we can mercilessly roast together. Me and the fake-caramel-stevia monstrosity will join you later."

Some of the tension in Felix's posture eased and he even gave Ace a small smile. "That sounds incredible."

"That's because I am incredible, bonito." Ace winked. "Now move your gorgeous ass or I'll force-feed you some of that pudding."

Felix actually chuckled at that, and he briefly squeezed Ace's hand before obediently moving to the fridge and bravely plating out a generous portion of Ace's slightly burnt attempt at cooking.

And the next time Ace was shopping at their local grocery store, well, he may or may not have bought the store’s entire selection of chocolate protein puddings to avoid further snack-related incidents in the near future.

[hayleylwong]

reflection 05-23

9:33pm - today i woke up at like 12:30. this was disappointing bc i was supposed to get up earlier to study for my chem midterm tm. instead i didnt study until like 4 bc i had to go sit outside and talk to people and then i went to class for like five minutes but i left to go study for chem bc i thought that was more important. i went to the schoenberg music practice rooms w my friend that can play piano to take a break from studying and omg the practice room hallway looks and sounds like a psychiatric ward like i swear all the instruments blended together and sounded like clown music and the hallway was long and the doors were all like scary w one little window in them. but i liked hearing my friend play piano. then i met my other friend at feast and ate dumplings and we got to talk i wish i could see her more often. then i went to study some more w my friend from before and we had to check like 15 lounges before we found an empty table. tn im gonna do pomodoro method so i am writing this during one of my breaks. i hope i can get through everything rn i feel like it is doable i bought yerba and celsius earlier so i am prepared for my all nighter. we will see how doable it feels as the night progresses. i am looking forward to 4:00pm tm when i can finally sleep after my midterm and hanging out w people for an hour 3 times in a row.

9:44pm - omg i called today the 21st accidentally. i just realized i cannot sleep at 4 bc of club work due at 5. ughhhh it is only the beginning of the night and i already want to sleep. i have overdone my pomodoro break by 11 minutes now. it is not a good sign.

12:10am - it was not a good sign. i have watched one and a half lectures and am two hours and twenty minutes into my current break. i went to the store and got more yerba mate but it is not working. i have seven lectures left and less than ten hours before my midterm. when am i going to shower. i now cannot sleep until 7pm tomorrow. my eczema is making me itch inside my body i am uncomfortable and everything is irritating me i cannot focus but i will. i will do it i have to otherwise idk what to do no i have to i really have to. only 19 more hours of misery.

3:54am - i have watched one hour of lecture in the last six hours. i am scared. there are other peoples review notes on the white board and i do not recognize some of the words. my friend said theyre important. no position is comfortable i am hella fidgety and my skin is freaking out. i want to shower but i do not have time. my friend is abt to go to sleep and leave me. who will keep me awake. i an beginning to do the thing i used to do where i blink weird and tense my head muscles bc i feel off. i am going to hug my boy. except i just saw his explore page and let me tell you i have never seen so many asian bikini thirst traps in my life. and i scrolled through his for you page and the same girl kept coming up. tell me why when i was scrolling through the explore he said ‘ooh a white one’ like three times. like actually wtf. have i told u guys his ex is white. my chem prof is rly grinding my gears rn. i hope i does not ever find my tumblr. i hope i can focus in the next six hours. oh no that is not enough time. no no no no no

5:16 - i actually cannot think. my head is numb. but the caffeine is finally working and i cannot sleep. i am so f ed. my head does not work. maybe i am just irritable rn. i hate everything. wtf is a nucleophile and how do u tell how strong it is. i just learned but i forget. i am going to cry.

5:26 - my friend is going to sleep soon. what am i gonna do. i was supposed to be done w lec by now and i have six left. i have four hours left before the exam. i have never been so disappointed in myself. i am sad. what am i going to do. i cant cry im too dehydrated and i dont have time for that. what is wrong w me

6:26 - how am i still on the same lecture as an hour ago. i am so miserable. was this quarter really worth it if im gonna fail this class? i wasnt even good at this quarter. but it is too late now bc if i dont go through w that i alr failed. i cant even hear anything shes saying anymore but i barely have time to watch even on 2x speed

6:50 - i am struggling. thinking abt doing anything makes me want to sob. i really really hope my club does not make us do stuff for an extra week bc i actually do not think i can. that week will be spent studying for finals. ik what to prioritize now. they should make that more clear. ughhh my brain is being attacked with words. it does not like it. i hate myself rn. i need to scream

jp updates: sam is feeling good today. he is curious whether or not he asks people for contact information weirdly and is working on changing his phrasing.

[ambreiiigns]

shit that happened on sanremo in the past couple of years for the uninitiated:

oscar winner roberto benigni talking abt bible lost media centered around sex

winners' names leaking like hours before the final rankings are supposed to be announced (????)

guests falling off the stairs and then different guests making fun of people who have fallen off the stairs

achille lauro . cultural reset

twerking ?!

microphones and the likes not working properly (this is like the biggest event in italian television And Yet)

contestants raising their left fists at the end of their song <3

one of the contestant (beloved old lady) forgot abt covid curfew and went outside late at night and got chased around by cops

during sanremo covid edition when they couldn't have spectators physically there in the crowd they set up balloons w faces on them in the empty seats and somehow a dick shaped balloon got sneaked in there and was caught on tv

again during sanremo covid edition a contestant got covid so he couldn't show up to perform but it felt Rude to kick him out of the competition so for four nights we had to watch the same clip of him performing during rehearsal and he still got like 4th place or smth

the two hosts who have been besties their whole lives simply kept acting up by doing things such as performing in half assed drag (which they'd been teasing since the beginning of the week) or slowdancing or rapping or spitting water on each other or fucking around w autotune or [...]

same old lady from before forgot to turn off the sink or smth and flooded her hotel room

achille lauro used too much catholic imagery in too gay and blasphemous ways so much so that the bishop of the city attempted to excommunicate him and one of the hosts who dueted w him (bishops don't have the power to do that so it was fine)

that same host occasionally took over the show by holding everyone hostage for like 10 minutes at a time talking about fucking whatever (wasn't he talking about piss at one point . ?!) and everyone of us was simply listening w heart eyes bc the last like 4 generations of italian people are helplessly in love w this man

two (2) yaoi kisses on national tv one of which happened during a bastardized wedding (thank you once again achille lauro)

contestant ran into the crowd and stole someone's purse (as a joke ?!)

guy screaming "Ibuprofen Sex" at the camera for four nights in a row and then getting last place or close

two men (one of which is just a Some Guy and the other is a known insane person) decided to participate as a duo and proceded to have personal issues w each other after like two nights which manifested in one of them secretly changing the lyrics to their song into a disstrack against his partner who then wordlessly walked off the stage and the first guy then acted like he didn't understand what was going on and the whole show stalled for a hot minute and they got disqualified . that was The Peak and we're still chasing that same high

måneskin won ig

[pixiemunsons]

we go together like (bb)

happy pride month my loves!! this is my eighth year out (almost to the day) and i'm so happy to be here with you<3

i couldn't stop myself writing another modern!benedict lol i'm so sorry, also it’s 3.7k words got carried away again x

fake dating (bc i’m a slut for it x), hella smut ngl, it’s soppy but idc, kate is a wingwoman anthony is an old man x

tagging @repuklore for the modern ben vibes

a mutually beneficial agreement becomes much more

bridgerton family parties were always guaranteed to be memorable, and you thanked the gods every time you were invited to one that you had known them long enough to be considered a member of the family. there was at least one major event every time; the drink kate threw over anthony that led to the two of them fucking in a closet (and being caught by violet), penelope and colin’s first kiss, the one when eloise ran away to meet a man from tinder and didn’t tell anyone where she was for three days - you had never forgiven phillip for that.

your ticket to the fantastical parties always lay with benedict, your best friend and closest confidant for as long as you could remember. the two of you mostly managed to stay out of the spotlight at these events, choosing instead to get drunk and dance together. there had been the time that you had been sick in one of colin’s shoes, but that was the year that anthony had very, very drunkenly proposed to the wrong sharma sister, so you had managed to avoid the consequences completely. this time, however, the halloween party was not a family affair but the social event of the year, with half of london society invited. you were dreading it; both you and benedict were twenty seven and single, which meant matchmaking. and lots of it.

───

‘benedict, for the last bloody time, i’m not telling people that we’re dating!’ you whispered back to your pouting best friend as you walked into your bedroom, attempting to slam the door shut behind you. he caught the door with his foot, wincing as eloise shouted something about keeping the noise down; you loved your friend dearly, but she had become almost unbearable since phillip had moved in. colin had offered the spare room at him and penelope’s place, but they were even worse. benedict sat down on your bed with those puppy dog eyes that you could barely resist, pleading his case.

‘my whole family thinks we’re together anyway! c’mon, you just have to hold my hand a bit, sit on my knee, just like normal. i just can’t cope with mrs cowper trying to set me up with cressida another year in a row! i’ll even wear a matching costume with you.’

‘people will notice that we’re not kissing,’ you warned, and arched a brow when he opened his mouth with a smirk. ‘and don’t even think about suggesting it, bridgerton! anyway, your mother will be expecting us to share a room at aubrey hall.’ your resolve was breaking by the moment, and you really couldn’t see a reason why you and benedict shouldn’t pretend to date for a night. you could have fun like usual, avoid all of the irritating mothers and then, in a few weeks, tell everyone it didn’t work out and you were back to being friends. it would have been the perfect solution.

if not for the fact that you were in love with your best friend.

how could you not be? benedict was the ideal man. he was kind hearted, artistic and loving, gentle mannered but so strong at the same time. and, well, who wouldn’t want to jump his bones? you had had plenty of opportunities with plenty of the men in your social circle, but rejected every one in the distant hope that you and benedict could somehow end up there. you had sort of fucked yourself over, really; they’d almost all moved on, and you had been benedict’s platonic plus one to more weddings than you could count over the last five years. it was just the two of you now, the spinster and the bachelor as he so lovingly nicknamed you, and the hope of settling down was slipping away every day that you pined after benedict and he didn’t see you.

still, you just couldn’t help yourself. and you had to admit, the matchmaking was becoming a little boring for you too.

you crossed your arms over your chest, sighing heavily, and benedict’s face lit up as soon as he knew he had you convinced. after all, when was the last time you said no to him? he flew off your bed, taking you in his arms and kissing your cheeks as you flushed bright red.

‘you’re the bestest friend in the whole wide world, y/n y/l/n,’ he grinned, and you couldn’t help but smile back.

───

you, of course, regretting agreeing to his plan as soon as you arrived at aubrey hall that saturday. he had insisted on walking in hand in hand, and you secretly hoped no one would notice until later, when everyone would be too drunk to care and you could avoid the planned pda entirely. 

that was, until gregory walked in and ruined your life with a ‘why are you holding hands? are you, like, a couple now?’ of course, he managed to ask you at the exact moment the whole bridgerton clan, wives and children included, walked into the foyer. violet dragged you into a bone crushing hug, jabbering on about how she just knew that you’d end up together. anthony and kate were next, smirking at you as they instructed the butler - god, these people were too rich for their own good - to take your bags up to benedict’s old room along with his own. you could read kate like a book, and right now her eyes were screaming ‘spill the tea, bitch,’ and you resolved to make it your mission to avoid her for the rest of your visit. after all, she was more than willing enough to share her own when her and anthony first got together; you’d had to disinfect every surface at the big house before you’d even touch it.

just as colin started asking when the two of you had gotten together, your life was saved by another bridgerton sibling. eloise launched herself through the front door, and you could hear her half-arguing with phillip; you thought it might be about their halloween costume, but you could barely tell because, just as she walked in, benedict took his chance to wrap an arm around your waist and swoop you up into the room that the two of you were to share. you had been in here plenty of times over the years, but it seemed different this time. for one, the four poster bed suddenly looked much too small for the two of you to share without having to get very close. benedict seemed to be realising the same thing. he rubbed the back of his neck and turned to you where you were trying to unpack.

‘i’ll take the floor, you can sleep in the bed,’ he offered, and you forced yourself to turn around to meet his eyes. 

‘no ben, don’t be stupid. we can share. we’ll both be too wankered to be bothered about where we sleep anyway. remember that year we fell asleep on that garden bench?’ you snorted, and he chuckled in response.

‘god, yeah. i still regret that to this day, i woke up and simon and daphne were… groping each other.’ he shuddered a little, and you laughed aloud. anthony and benedict had nearly killed simon, until you had intervened and reminded them that not only was she a grown woman, the two of them had gotten up to a lot worse with other people’s younger sisters. the two eldest bridgertons had almost died of embarrassment, and daphne was now a hastings with two children, so you supposed it all worked out in the end.

‘anyway, let’s get ready for this party. time to put our couple faces on.’

───✱*.。:。✱*.:。✧*.。✰*.:。✧*.。:。*.。✱ ───

violet had really outdone herself with this one. the already beautiful grand hall was adorned in such stylish halloween decor, spooky without being tacky. everyone looked amazing; anthony and kate’s family were dressed as the addams, with charlotte in an adorable wednesday wig. colin and pen were fred and daphne from scooby doo, and something about the way penelope was glowing and colin held a protective arm around her waist told you they’d have an announcement to make very soon. daphne and simon’s family were, of course, dressed immaculately as the incredibles, whilst hyacinth had somehow convinced gregory and francesca to join her in dressing as the witches from hocus pocus. violet was wearing a beautiful replica regency era ballgown, and you could now see why eloise and phillip had fallen out; she had dressed as the red m&m, but it appeared that the message had become lost somewhere, because phillip had bleached his hair and was wearing a gold chain, evidently in an attempt at an eminem costume.

you and benedict always matched at these occasions, even if it wasn’t a costume party; he always wore a tie the colour of your dress, or you would both wear bridgerton blue for the finer gatherings. this time, you had elected for a classic danny and sandy, and you had to give yourself a clap on the back. benedict looked fantastic with his hair teased into a quiff, and those black jeans were doing wonders for him. you knew you looked sexy, too; your hair was curled and backcombed into a similar style to olivia newton-john’s, and the leather pants were clinging to you like a second skin. you felt amazing, even more so when you walked into the room to door natured wolf-whistles from your friends; kate’s was, unsurprisingly, the loudest. soon, you and benedict fell into a familiar routine; he brought you two shots each, and you downed them before dragging him to the dance floor.

usually, the dances between the two of you were sexy but friendly - you could grind on each other while laughing, benedict encouraging you to drop while holding one of your hands and twirling you around. this time, however, it felt more… sensual. you weren’t sure if it was what you were drinking or if he was just putting on a show for everyone now that you were ‘dating’, but benedict had a firm grip on your hips as he pulled you to him, draping your arms around his own neck and pulling you so close you could feel his breath on your face. you could feel his hands wandering over your hips and waist, and you smirked up at him.

‘hands off, mr bridgerton, or i’ll cut them off.’ he leaned down until you were cheek to cheek, panting as he danced with you.

‘you’re my girlfriend, aren’t you? this is what boyfriends do.’ you had to admit that the way he had mockingly murmured girlfriend had rushed straight between your legs, and from the way he was looking at you, you knew he knew it too. you had no idea what had gotten into him, but you were certainly enjoying it. he looked around, whispering to you once more.

‘everyone’s looking at us, babe, wanna give them a show?’ you looked up into his handsome face, and your resolve to not kiss him broke like a dam.

‘fuck it.’ you grabbed his cheeks, pulling him into an embrace full of fire. you hoped to convince yourself that you could have this. you could have a kiss from him and you’d never need another. you could take this now, and tonight he would sleep on the floor and you could move on. 

there was no chance of that now.

not when he tasted like whiskey and his hand was tangled in your hair, pulling you to him and crushing you with the weight of his tongue in your mouth and smothering you with little moans. you could feel eyes from around the room boring into you but you simply could not bring yourself to care, not when his chest was so hard under your hands and his stubble was scratching your lips so deliciously. you pulled away slowly, and when you looked up through your lashes his pupils were blown, eyes almost completely dark. he licked his lips, looking around the room at the few people who were still staring, and your own eyes landed on kate. she was laughing at a red-faced anthony, who was attempting to shield the children’s eyes, and behind her back she gave you a small thumbs up. god, you loved that woman.

‘this might be a stupid question,’ benedict started, and you made eye contact once more. ‘but do you wanna… go upstairs maybe?’ your heart dropped in your chest. you knew if this went any further, you’d regret it forever. he’ll never be yours, your brain said, but before you knew it, your mouth had already spoken; ‘yeah, sure.’ 

your mouth, for the record, was a fucking bitch. 

benedict all but dragged you upstairs, and you could hear colin and a few of benedict’s friends whooping behind you. once you got to his room he took the chance to press you against the door and kiss you once more before letting you both in. the energy was charged and thick now that the two of you were alone, and you could have cut the tension with a knife.

‘before we-‘

‘i need to-‘

you both started at the same time, and benedict prompted you on. ever the gentleman. you took a deep breath, ready for the consequences no matter what they were, and spoke in a shuddery and tearful whisper.

‘i’ve been in love with you for a really long time, benedict,’ you started, and you could’ve sworn his lower jaw nearly fell off. ‘and i can’t do this if it’s just gonna be once. i can forget a kiss, even one as good as that, but this… i couldn’t. i’ve been doing this for way too long, pretending i don’t love you, and i won’t anymore.’ your lower lip had started to tremble, and you wiped away your tears with your sleeve. benedict stepped closer to you, looking at you curiously. ‘i can cope, if you don’t love me back. it’s okay. i’ll go back to the party, and i’ll be okay.’ you looked up with an expression that you hoped was confident, even though this was the longest you’d ever heard ben go silent for. he just studied you, staring over your face and body, and, humiliated, you turned to the door. maybe you could tell them all that you just broke up, hammer a few shots with eloise and forget this ever happened. yeah, sounds like a plan.

just as you reached for the handle, however, a large hand closed over your own, and you felt benedict’s front settle at your back as he had so many times on the dance floor. a long finger hooked around the hair at your ear and pulled it back, and he leaned down, breath skimming the side of your neck.

‘i have waited a very long time to hear you say that,’ he whispered, and you tried to turn around, but he stopped you with a hand on your lower back. ‘and i have wanted to say those exact words for a very long time, too.’ you leaned your head back against his chest, his chin resting on your crown. ‘i need you to know that it’s been true for me for years. i’ve been in love with you since that first party when we were sixteen.’ you laughed aloud at this, remembering the night you had met.

‘isn’t that the one when i rescued you from phillipa featherington?’ you asked, and he spun you around, nodding.

‘god, her mother’s pushy.’

‘worked out well for colin, even if he does hate her. she’s been trying to set him and pen up for years. she’ll be happy soon enough, i think she might be pregnant.’ benedict threw up his hands in shock, and you realised that he had intertwined his fingers with your own.

‘no one tells me anything!’ he shouted, and you laughed at him once more.

‘she’s not said anything, women just know these things. intuition.’

he looked down at you again, stroking your face with a rough hand.

‘you never knew i loved you.’

‘neither did you,’ you murmured, and reached up to kiss him once more. it started slow and steady, his hand caressing your cheek and his tongue stroking against yours. soon enough, it became hot and heavy between you once more, and benedict reached down to pull you into his arms. you crossed your legs behind his back, groaning as he pressed himself against you, and you could feel how hard he was already for you. you had dreamed about this for years, but nothing was as good as the real thing. he led the two of you to the bed, dropping you on it before crawling over you.

‘everyone else seemed to, though,’ he murmured into your neck, lips whispering across your collar. ‘everyone’s been asking about you for years. cinth asked me last week if she could be bridesmaid when we get married.’ you let out a chuckle which trailed off into a moan when benedict bit down on the column of your neck, and your hands trailed up his back, pulling him impossibly closer.

‘mum asked me a few months ago if i kept rejecting your mates because i was waiting for you,’ you divulged to him, carding fingers through his thick hair. benedict looked up from his position at your breast bone, eyebrow cocked.

‘did you?’

‘i did.’

he leant down to suck at the exposed skin of your left breast, suckling a dark bruise into the flesh which you were sure would be there for weeks. ‘good.’

his lips attached themselves to your neck once more, teeth grazing over the sensitive skin, and your legs wound their way around his waist once more. benedict’s movements became frantic, yanking off his shirt before pulling at the hem of yours. as soon as it was off, bra going with it, his lips were all over you once more. there wasn’t even time to be shy, to worry about your best friend seeing you for the first time, because he was worshipping you like a fucking deity and you had never felt more desired, more wanted.

‘baby, please, i need you.’ he was whimpering, grinding up against your core like a horny teenage boy, and you thought he might cum in his pants when you used your legs as leverage to flip the two of you over until you were straddling him. you used a finger to tilt his head back, forcing eye contact, and kissed him once more. by now, your costume red lipstick was smeared all over his mouth and neck, and he looked so pretty begging for you like this.

‘do you really? i would never have known.’

you leant down to his neck, kissing so chastely down his chest that he was crying out for more after three gentle pecks. you grinned up at him, tucking your hair behind your ears before kissing slowly down his stomach to his pants. unbuttoning them, you could hear him swearing under his breath above you, and when you started to suckle on his hipbone he let out an especially loud ‘oh, fuck!’. you cocked an eyebrow up at him questioningly as you pulled off his trousers, taking his underwear with them. you couldn’t help but stare at him, exposed to you for the first time so intimately, and you knew you were dripping. you reached for his length, but he pushed your hand away, panting.

‘as much as i really, really want you to, i wanna cum in you,’ he gasped, and you had to admit that sounded like a really good idea right now. so you stood up to shimmy your pants off, crawling back over benedict as he had over you earlier, now bare before each other. he stared up at you so tenderly it brought tears to your eyes, an emotional moment in such a charged atmosphere, and he stroked a hand down your waist to hold your hip.

‘you’re so beautiful, you know? i never really appreciated you like i should have. i’m going to do that every day now.’ you smiled down at him, kissing his lips gently and lining yourself up with him.

‘i’m on the pill, if you wanna-‘

‘god, yes,’ he hissed out, and you slid yourself down onto him.

even with how wet you’d been all night it was a tight fit, and you had to take a moment to compose yourself on him. you squeezed at benedict’s broad shoulders as he peppered reassuring kisses all across your own, rubbing a soothing hand across your back. slowly, you lifted your hips halfway, before pushing back down hard. he hit a spot in you that you had no idea even existed, and the resultant moans from the two of you could surely be heard halfway across the building. you built yourself into a steady rhythm, hair falling down in front of your face as benedict met your thrusts with his own hips, fingers digging into your waist with a fervent need. you had never been with a man so vocal, and his non-stop groans and gasps of your name were slowly but surely pushing you closer and closer to the edge.

‘so good for me, so fucking good,’ he was almost whimpering, pressing kisses to as much of your hot skin as he could reach, and when he traced his tongue under the curve of your right breast, tasting your skin? your orgasm hit you like a truck, and benedict picked up the slack of your stuttering hips and ground himself up into you, cumming with a roar of ‘oh, fuck, y/n!’

the two of you sat for a moment, revelling in each other before you carefully, slowly pulled yourself off him, both of you hissing from how sensitive you were. you laid down next to benedict, both completely naked, and he pressed a kiss to your forehead gently.

‘i love you, y/n.’

he said it with such sincerity you could have cried, choosing instead to press a hearty kiss to his lips once more.

‘i love you too. forever.’

[1kook]

crunchyroll & rail

the 10th installment of my netflix & chill series !

SUMMARY Never mind the fact you really like Sailor Moon, or that you really want to pay attention to every little detail; the moment becomes Jungkook and his big smile and his red cheeks and the tiny box he produces from within his pocket. WARNINGS smut in the forms of making out, jk nipple play, some 69 action, cunnilingus, blowjobs, brief choking, jk trying his best to listen to oc but he doesn’t rlly :/, fingering, missionary bc his eyes are pretty, unprotected fuckin raw, its romantic but when is it not… MISC fluffy and domestic <3, weekend getaway <3, the Big Question, shy jk, sailor moon supremacy, jk makes this big elaborate speech about the sun and moon, mentions of 240p YouTube quality, RATING m (18+) WC 8.7k

NOTE (!) the smut in this chapter is relatively short ! I was more concerned with writing this monumental step in their relationship, so sorry to all the lads who come here specifically for the p0rn but today we focus on the l0ve <333 anyway nc 10!!!!! Can u fuckin believe….

Jungkook mentions it at the dinner table one night. You’re not eating— well, you are not eating; Jungkook has been stocking up on his protein intake like a madman —but finishing up some work you had brought home. Your back aches, your eyes burn. The mere sound of his soft voice has all those feel-good endorphins shooting through your nervous system like a shot of adrenaline. “We should take a trip,” he says, fork clattering against his plate to signify the end of his feast. 

Your fingers tap across your keyboard, eyes flickering between an Excel sheet and the report you’re typing out. It takes you a moment to respond, a delayed, “huh,” that even Jungkook doesn’t find convincing.  

In the background, you’re listening to what has to be one of the worst voiceovers of the original Sailor Moon series in a language you don’t even understand. But you know the series like the back of your hand, know what exactly is happening even if you don’t understand what they’re saying, because you’ve watched it only about a million times. It’s mostly just there for background purposes anyway, some white noise to try and replicate the noisy soundtrack of your office. 

To make matters worse—complicated?—, you had been too lazy to get onto your usual pirating sites and had settled for the five minute, five part, 240p clips of Sailor Moon on YouTube (you know the ones), and Jungkook has to wait until Episode 74: Part ⅖ ends before you grace him with a proper response. “Where do you wanna go, baby?” you ask, giving your eyes a break from the data as you move to scour YouTube for Episode 74: Part 3/5. 

He’s stretching back now, arms wound up above his head. His hair— god, his hair —is an ashy color now, a faded version of its golden ancestor from a few months ago. Soon, he’s planning on going back to brown, claims he’s getting too old to be dying his hair, whatever that means. For now, you watch his inked fingers run through his scalp; he looks delectable. Maybe you’re hungrier than you initially thought. Or at least thirstier. “A cabin,” he suggests, and he offers this little half shrug that would otherwise seem normal had you not been well-versed in the art of Jungkook Body Language. His front teeth nibble at his lip, eyes laser focused on his empty plate. Even now, he still gets nervous asking you out. That thought alone makes your ego soar as high as an airplane. “Just something small.”

Usually, “something small” with Jungkook ends up being something big and, in most cases, something expensive. Which you’re totally not opposed to— you’re at the point in your relationship where you don’t even bother trying to dissuade Jungkook from showering you with gifts. It’s one of his many, many, many, many forms of loving you and, well, he knows you like the back of his hand. He rarely misses. 

Lo and behold, it is a grander affair than a simple cabin. “Well, it’s more like a resort,” he confesses, reaching across the table for your hand. Immediately, his thumb finds itself rubbing over the simple band of your promise ring. “Just wanna do something nice for you. I know you’ve been tired lately,” he adds on, voice a quiet murmur that nearly gets lost under the intensity of the pout that appears whenever he becomes even the slightest bit bashful. 

You smile, the fondness in your heart skyrocketing to impossible heights when he lifts your hand to press those pretty petal lips against your knuckles. “Well, just let me know when,” you tell Jungkook. “So I can request time off from work.” 

Episode 74: Part 3/5 starts playing after an ad, and you’d pause it for the sake of preserving this moment with Jungkook, but it’s hidden under so many tabs on your laptop that you lose it the second you leave the tab. Jungkook’s head tilts to the side, sending his ashy locks cascading beautifully. “You know that show is on Crunchyroll,” Jungkook says, seemingly moving past his bout of shyness now. “And you have the password.” 

“Do I,” you murmur, but he’s lost you once more, your true talent of typing with one hand showing itself as you return to your Excel sheet, the other still firmly squeezed in his grasp. Jungkook releases soon enough anyway, cleans up the table quickly, and disappears off into the kitchen. He sings when he washes the dishes, likes to pretend he’s a terrible singer even though you’ve told him countless times he could easily take X Factor by storm. (And you know exactly what it takes to wow those judges— you spent the entire last month psychotically watching multiple X Factor seasons from multiple different countries, nearly considered joining the damn audition yourself.) The horribly dubbed Sailor Moon is yelling now, shrieking really, and Jungkook calls from the kitchen, “don’t forget to take your contacts out, sweetheart.” 

It’s domestic and it's nerve-wracking. 

You want Jungkook, that much is a fact. Aristotle and Socrates and that other guy could debate the philosophical intricacies of the world, turn this dimension in on itself until it was a scrambled mess of emotion and thought, but the one thing they could never change, could never even question, is your love for your boyfriend. You want Jungkook badly, but more importantly, you want Jungkook forever. 

And you’re sure Jungkook probably, maybe, hopefully feels that way too. But the way you feel is… slightly concerning to say the least. For starters, you’re convinced your love for Jungkook was meant to be, and that’s saying a lot coming from you. You’re not one for cheesy, soulmate tales— that was more Jungkook’s thing —but the more you think about it, the more you become convinced that you and Jungkook were destined to meet. Like the planets aligned one year, the stars conferred, a tectonic plate somewhere in California shifted; whatever it may have been, something happened somewhere that led to the birth of this beautiful romance of yours. 

Lately, being with Jungkook has this inexplicably fiery feeling blossoming in your chest, these waves of emotion that sometimes have you fantasizing about the weirdest of scenarios with him. Like yelling at him for not taking the garbage out on time, or bumping into each other as you make dinner in the kitchen, or buying a new rug together. 

(Most drastically, the other day, you had a dream where you were pregnant and Jungkook was there and there was a house and a dog and an annoyingly friendly neighbor and this god-awful tile in the bathroom.) 

Long story short, you’ve been fantasizing about a forever with Jungkook. The concerning part is the timing; was this too early? You’re nearly halfway through your second year with Jungkook now, and you know most people date for many, many years before the mere thought of union even occurs to them. In another life, maybe you were the same, would have held off until the very last moment. But with Jungkook things just feel right (at least for you), like there wasn’t going to be anyone else after him. And you sincerely hoped there wouldn’t be. 

You slump back into your seat, eyes fluttering shut. Too many thoughts swirl around your mind, and the screech of the Sailor Moon voiceover on screen certainly doesn’t help. How you managed to spiral that far down your thoughts in the span of one 240p, five minute clip of a larger episode amazes even you. To add onto your worries, the clip abruptly ends and Episode 74: Part ⅘ is nowhere in sight, a fact that draws a frustrated moan out of the already sensitive you. 

Luckily, Jungkook eventually returns, standing closely behind you. His presence is enormous, the room suddenly overflowing with a shit ton of those feel-good endorphins all over again, except this time they reach an all-time high when he leans over and quietly shuts your laptop. “Come sleep,” he says softly, and it’s a pleasant mixture of his genuinely caring voice and that horndog purr of his that lures you into bed. And it’s that same voice that croons softly into your ear, fingers nestled between your folds until you’re orgasming yourself into a deep slumber. 

Much to no one’s surprise, the cabin turns out to be quite the luxurious lodging; two floors of dark oak everywhere you turn, a stunning stone fireplace in the bedroom, and a truly breathtaking view of the resort’s snowy hill (read: front row seats to watch all the snowboarders and skiers wipe out in the snow). Jungkook had splurged quite the pretty penny on it, so you make a point to clap it up for him when he first opens the door to your temporary home for the weekend. 

The main bedroom is beyond words. It’s got an attached balcony (that you doubt you’ll be using in this chilly weather), and a wooden canopy bed that makes you feel like a royal (that you will certainly be using). It’s separated into two areas, the bed space and a tiny entertainment area on the other side of the room. Perhaps the best thing about the room— and the cabin itself —is the huge, smart TV mounted above said stone fireplace and the fact it allows the phone mirroring option in lieu of not having any streaming sites. And as is with every and anything to do with televisions, Jungkook is the most excited of the two of you. “Baby, look,” he beams, pointing excitedly at whatever he’s got mirrored onto the television this time. Knowing him, it’s probably another documentary. 

You had the forethought to finish your work before the trip, spent two days in the office going absolutely ham on this month’s final reports until your department head promptly sent you home to finish the rest there. You had given yourself a fright upon entering the bathroom that night, the state of your under eyes so severe, you feared it was sufficient cause for a national emergency. Similarly, Jungkook had done the same with his work, cooped himself up in his study until he was free from the shackles of capitalism for the weekend. All this to say you’ve missed him these past few days. 

But even though you’re sorely malnourished in the affection department and craving a good kiss or two, you wouldn’t dare interrupt one of Jungkook’s little nerdy, tech-induced fanboy moments. They’re cute, in their own geeky way, providing some insight to a mellower side of your boyfriend who looks on with childlike wonder; Jungkook’s eyes always get so big when he talks about nerdy stuff. You get to work hanging up the silk shirt he packed for tomorrow night’s fancy dinner at the resort, listening to some British narrator’s detailed description of the functionally extinct Northern white rhinos living under 24-hour surveillance in Kenya.  

(Jungkook’s really into nature documentaries again, had spent a few nights sniffling as he watched that one Koko the gorilla film.) 

The original plan was to head to the nearest store and whip up something small to eat at the cabin. But Jungkook is a little tired from the long drive, slumps down into the couch in front of the now lit fireplace like a limbless blob as he tunes into his documentary. His nose is a little red from the outside chill. It’s so cute. He’s so cute. You love him so much, you fear you’ll accidentally squeeze his cheeks to death. It’s a thought that occurs more times than you’d like. 

According to the pamphlet on the nightstand, the resort has its own room-service to order from. Normally you would do that, but not this time; you had gotten into a bit of a squabble with the man at the front desk after he had tried to withhold Jungkook’s reservation for arriving two minutes past your check-in time, called each other all sorts of names before he backed down and gave you your room key. So you’re still a little salty, to say the least. Instead, you settle in for some pizza in front of the huge TV, calling up the nearest place to order some of Jungkook’s and your favorites. 

You plop down beside him, instinctively cuddling closer when he wraps an arm around your shoulders. “So,” you start, flipping through the rest of the resort’s introductory pamphlet. There’s a loud roar on screen. In all honesty, you didn’t even know what Northern white rhinos sounded like until then, and you probably never would have if not for the man beside you. “What are you in the mood for tonight, sweet boy?” 

You’re not sure if it’s the fatigue or the overall relaxed vibes he’d been exuding since the moment you entered the cabin, but Jungkook is weirdly cooperative today. “Whatever you want,” he responds, head on your shoulder. He even places the remote in your hands, gives your enclosed fist a gentle tap as if he’s just handed you the secret to eternal youth. In other words, it’s a rare sight to behold. “This is your trip, pretty girl.” 

You appreciate the sentiment, but feel the need to clear the air, tucking your feet up onto the couch as you snuggle closer. “Our trip,” you clarify, and snatch the remote anyway before he changes his mind. 

Jungkook releases a quiet huff of laughter, head rolling back against the couch cushions to display his thick, juicy neck that definitely doesn’t awaken any vampiric tendencies in you. “We can even watch some anime if you want,” he murmurs, casually throwing an arm around your shoulders in a way that would have made any teenage girl in the early 2000s squeal with excitement. It’s one of those barely there touches, but the way he holds you makes you feel so safe and warm and loved. So loved and in love. “The ones on Crunchyroll, though.”

For the sake of preserving these good vibes (and your ears [and Jungkook’s sanity]), you navigate to the Crunchyroll app on your phone, quickly finding your latest obsession and mirroring it onto the big television before Jungkook can react. “Sailor Moon?” he asks with a tone that implies a feigned interest, mostly out of respect for you; he’s, sadly, still not the big dorky anime fan you had hoped to convert him into. 

“In the name of the moon, I’ll punish you,” you recite dutifully, snatching up the throw blanket on the end of the couch. It’s barely big enough to cover the both of you, has Jungkook’s outstretched legs and your booty subject to the chilly air. Who cares, Jungkook is a furnace anyway. 

He snorts. “Punish me,” he mumbles, as if he doesn’t believe it. His snarky comment wins him a playful pinch against his doughy cheek, not that he particularly defends himself against it anyway, eyes fluttering shut as you tug at the pale skin. 

“Don’t fuck with the moon, Jungkook,” you warn him, snuggling closely against his side as your favorite opening song begins filtering through the speakers of the television before you. It’s infinitely better than the 240p YouTube clips you had subjected yourself to the entire last week, the graphics scarily clear. 

“Right, of course,” Jungkook says, but a hint of amusement seems to curl around the sound anyway. Nevertheless, he lets it go, cuddles into your side as you pour your full focus into watching yet another group of ragtag teenagers with supernatural abilities kick some ass. 

You can tell Jungkook isn’t really into it, and you’re torn between just snuggling him into a well deserved nap or taping his eyelids open so he can become a fan of this show with you. 

The loving, caring, adoring side of you says Jungkook deserves the entire world and more (the more in question preferably being a fluffy blanket and a nap). He worked hard this week, just like you, and on top of that he was the one who planned this entire weekend getaway for the two of you to enjoy. You want him to rest up.

The obnoxiously in love girlfriend-slash-best friend in you says Jungkook is sorely missing out on one of the greatest shows on planet Earth and that naps are for the weak. 

Your jumbled thoughts are interrupted by a loud sound on the television, a yelp from Ms. Sailor Moon herself that has you jolting up in surprise. Jungkook welcomes you deeper into his embrace, chuckles at your little fright. “Scared?” he teases in that low voice that makes you feel like you’re going crazy, really. So crazy and irrational, and the only thing that stops you from bombarding him with an unexpected outpouring of love is that hard and sharp thing that pokes your side when you get too close to him. It’s not Jungkook, sadly, but something in the front pocket of his hoodie instead. 

And for some reason, part of your brain is stuck all of a sudden, rewinding the last two and a half years like a broken cassette tape that had the tape reel hastily stuffed back inside by a toddler. It’s choppy to say the least, and it certainly doesn’t help when Jungkook calls your name softly, tenderly. “__,” he murmurs. It’s a little weird; it’s not often he says your name, mostly referring to you with one of the many pet names from that part of his vocabulary that focuses exclusively on terms of endearment. Your heart skips a beat. 

Now, if anyone were to ask, it’s approximately around this time that you begin to spiral. The pink curve of his bottom lip is just too close, the mole on his nose too prominent. Paired with the obnoxious tittering of Usagi on screen, you can feel your thoughts begin to overlap, bumping into each other within the realm of your brain until all that comes out are the messiest of messy thoughts. 

They go like this: 

Most episodes of any anime run for approximately thirty minutes. Take out the commercial breaks, the opening and ending credits, and it becomes something closer to twenty. Twenty minutes per episode, filled with plot and gags and tears and whatever else necessary to make you feel something, anything really. 

“What’s in your pocket?” you ask tentatively. 

In contrast, it takes approximately two seconds for Jungkook’s lips to quirk up— first the right side, always the right side —and his eyes to crinkle. Two seconds for him to smile, a sweet expression that reminds you of Netflix and college and quiet laughter and tattoos and silly YouTube videos and cookies and cell phones and job applications and blond hair; two seconds to make you feel everything all at once. 

“There’s nothing,” he says, but his cheeks are pink, and it’s not from the cold anymore. His smile is so big it makes your own cheeks ache just looking at it. You can’t even hear the television anymore. Never mind the fact you really like Sailor Moon, or that you really want to pay attention to every little detail; the moment becomes Jungkook and his big smile and his red cheeks and the tiny box he produces from within his pocket. “It was supposed to be for tomorrow,” he admits, unwrapping his arm from around you. 

It’s a little funny, somehow, because his hands are covered in ink, in tiny doodles and intricate pieces of swirls and words that ooze this aura of strength and toughness. But they tremble when he opens it, as unsteady as a wispy dandelion on a windy day, fumbling with the box. And when you look closely, he’s been biting at the skin along his thumb again, that nervous habit you’ve been trying forever to help him overcome. 

Someone is saying something on screen, something important to the plot. The volume is loud, but not as loud as your heart. Not as loud as Jungkook’s quiet murmur when he speaks again. “Will you marry me?” he asks softly, looks at you with flushed cheeks and big eyes and his heart on his sleeve. 

The answer has always been the same, hasn’t changed since the first time he planted the seed in your mind. Still, it catches in your throat, nearly loses out to a surprised and emotional sob that you barely manage to bite down. You had just been speaking, had just been ready to deliver a whole spiel on the importance of him watching Sailor Moon with you. But when you try now, it’s raspy and dry, as if you haven’t used your voice in years. “I— yes,” you exhale, surprised by the lonely tear that trails down your cheek. You go to wipe it away, but Jungkook beats you with a gentle hand cupping your cheek. 

His smile is wobbly, patches of red blossoming across his face that eventually consume his entire appearance as he leans his forehead against yours. Only then do you realize he’s crying, and you laugh out of reflex. “You’re crying,” you say, and Jungkook snorts. 

“You cried first,” he sniffles, smiling. “You made me cry.” 

He looks like a wreck, but, like, a hot wreck. An engaged, hot wreck who’s eyes flicker back to the TV to remind you to pause your anime, always so considerate. You do, hastily smashing buttons on the remote before remembering it’s controlled by your phone, hands flying back and forth as your nerves actively work to retire themselves after Jungkook’s proposal. “Easy there,” he soothes, eventually catching your hand in his, drawing it up for a kiss against your knuckles. 

The ring fits perfectly, snuggly. Vaguely, a memory drifts through your thoughts of Jungkook and Doyeon on a rampant mission to reorganize your jewelry box a few months ago, but it disappears as quickly as it came. You’re taken by the ring, a simple band with a pretty diamond on top. It’s a good mixture of you and him; flashy yet mild. 

“You love me,” you marvel, a revelation you’ve had the honor of experiencing time and time again with Jungkook. Still, it never fails to render you speechless. He hums. 

“I do,” he says, taking your hand in his. “It’s the easiest thing for me. Like breathing, or existing. I think I was made to love you.” And normally, you’d be the first one to correct him. Jungkook was made for so much more, a fact he’s proven time and time again with his abilities and the sheer size of his heart. He was your golden boy, could do anything he set his mind to. Always amazing you, always making you fall in love all over again. 

But now, with the weight of his words sitting heavy in the air, you find yourself incapable of negating the fact, instead sniffling at the meaning. 

Pleased with your silence, Jungkook places another chaste kiss against your ring. “I love you, __,” he confesses, voice nearly a whisper. Your entire body feels as if it is doused in gasoline, lit aflame over and over again. Your heart threatens your rib cage, pounds away with the strength of a world renowned boxer. Jungkook’s hands curl around your wrists carefully. “I used to think we were like the moon and the sun,” he admits, “that you were my sun and I was your moon. In love but always separated by those thin veils of the sunrise and the sunset.” He pauses, nuzzling sweetly against your palm once more before gently guiding them down between the two of you. “But that really sucks— saying goodbye to you every night? I hate that, __. I hate watching you leave, I hate watching you run off in the mornings or halfway through the day, having to drive back and forth from your place to mine. I hate having to be away from you when all I wanna do is hold you. I— I want to be by your side,” he rambles, eyes nervously meeting yours. They’re still glassy, dark lashes framing his chocolate irises wonderfully. “Forever.” 

Your heartbeat stutters, the simple word looping itself in your mind like that night in his dining room all over again, all the fantasies of having a forever with Jungkook bubbling to the surface. Jungkook pushes on. “You are my sun,” he says softly, mostly to himself. “But… I don’t wanna be the moon anymore. Being the moon means, eventually, I’ll have to say goodbye. In the night or in the morning, it always comes to an end. And I don't want there to be an end with you,” he insists, clutching your hand tightly. “I wanna be another star, the closest one to you. The one who gets to be with you forever. I wanna be by you and shine with you and—“

“Explode into a gazillion little fragments of cosmic dust with me,” you offer, and Jungkook nods along eagerly, too amped up on his speech to bother scolding you for your playful comment. 

“Yes, I want to— to—“ The words catch in his throat. So much emotion from the man you once thought was the dictionary definition of calm and collected. “To—“ 

“Marry me,” you fill in, and Jungkook practically blows a fuse from how emotionally fired up he’s become, exclaiming a resolute, “yes!” that leaves you stupidly grinning back at him. 

His outburst leaves him with flushed cheeks. “I do,” he reiterates in a softer tone, averting his gaze from you as if embarrassed by his cheesy outpouring of emotion. Usually, it’s the other way around; you make all the corny declarations of love and Jungkook laughs along suavely. It feels nice to have the tables turned. 

There’s so much to say, but the words all fade away when Jungkook shyly looks at you again. You settle on tackling him back onto the couch cushions, taking his surprised little yelp in stride as you suffocate him in your embrace. “Save those words for the big day, superstar,” you giggle, peppering his red face with tiny kisses that make him scrunch up cutely. “I can’t wait to blow up into one huge supernova with you.” 

Beneath you, Jungkook groans. “I’m sorry,” he huffs, voice muffled against your shoulder. Begrudgingly, his arms come up to envelope you, pulling you closer until the blanket scrunches up uncomfortably between you two. “That must’ve sounded so lame.” 

Leaning back so you’re not completely squishing him, you carefully push his silvery hair away from his forehead. “Don’t be,” you assure him, placing one chaste peck against his pouty lips. “I thought it was cute. I didn’t know you were into astrology.” 

A sigh. “Astronomy,” he corrects, “astrology has to do with zodiac signs and placements.” 

You run your thumbs over his cheeks, collecting any of the drying tears that paint his face. “Oh, like how you’re a Virgo and I’m a“— 

The TV remote you had lost somewhere along the way is suddenly rematerialized beneath your knee, sends the speakers blaring to life with a deafening screech that has both you and Jungkook leaping up like two frightened cats. “You always do this,” he laughs, that loud boyish sound that makes you feel like you’re sitting on a cloud. He watches you with a gentle smile as you hurriedly shut off the television, the remote haphazardly tossed somewhere behind you afterwards. You return to his embrace, wrap your arms around his waist and snuggle into his warmth. His heart thumps a steady rhythm beneath your ear. 

“You’re gonna be stuck with me forever,” you warn him, clutching at the fabric of his shirt like he’ll suddenly disintegrate before your eyes.

Above you, Jungkook hums, placing a kiss against the crown of your head. “I look forward to it,” he responds, pulling you impossibly closer, until you can feel the wrinkles in his shirt imprinting themselves against your cheek. He’s back to being that suave bastard again, and you find yourself wishing you had milked those big crocodile tears out of him for just a little bit longer. 

Fingers gently press against the muscles in your nape, push themselves in deeply until you can feel all the tension seeping out, turning you into a limbless blob over Jungkook. “Jeez,” you sigh, eyes fluttering shut. “And you wanted to wait until tomorrow.”

He huffs out a laugh. “I just thought you’d rather get engaged at a fancy restaurant with a pretty dress,” he defends, and you can hear the grin on his face. “For the photos.”

“Fair point,” you concede, eventually pushing yourself up so you’re not entirely squishing your boyfriend beneath you. Jungkook is already looking at you when you lift your head, has got this funny double-chin from this angle that makes his normally sharp jawline disappear. You find yourself tapping a finger against his chin, on the chocolate chip mole that hides itself beneath his plump bottom lip. “If anything, just propose to me again tomorrow at the restaurant.”

It wins you an eye-roll. “I’m not gonna propose to you again tomorrow,” he laughs, doesn’t even push you away when you become annoying and start tapping your fingers against all his beauty marks like you’re playing Whack-a-Mole. 

“Booo,” you frown, but let it go soon enough, foregoing your little game to press your lips against his. “Then I better make this a night to remember,” you murmur, tilting your head to the side.

Your hands dip into his luscious locks, fingernails tracing thin lines along his scalp that are certain to send tingles down his spine. As predicted, Jungkook releases a quiet groan soon after, a sound that’s muffled against your own lips. He’s pliant tonight, but not in a way that would elude fatigue. Pliant in a way that suggests he wants you to take the reins tonight, exhaling softly against you as he parts his lips. 

“Let me take care of you,” you hum, the hand that had been mindlessly hovering along his cheek drifting down to caress the side of his neck. Jungkook nods, his irises swimming in lust. You smile at his silent compliance, give his throat a light squeeze that makes his breathing hitch in surprise. 

He’s always at his prettiest when he’s beneath you like this, limbs moving in slow motion as you guide him along. You can already feel the beginnings of his arousal stirring beneath the front of his sweats, his cock slowly making its presence known against your thigh. You press your lips against his once more, making sure to make it rougher than the first kiss. Your tongue is met with little resistance, slips past his lips and dips into the hot cave of his mouth where Jungkook releases another trembling breath. 

Two hands come up behind you, trail themselves over your back and down to your ass, where he gives the two globes a tight squeeze. It draws a whimper out of you, one that Jungkook greedily swallows up. His tongue rubs up along yours, the wet muscle daringly pushing back against yours. His rebelliousness is only quelled with another press of your fingertips around his throat.

“Slow down,” you tell him. The first roll of your hips against him is slow, cruel in that you cut the motion short just as Jungkook begins to push back. A bratty huff escapes him, swollen pink lips pushing out into that endearing pout you love so much. It makes you grin, releasing the grip around his throat to carefully brush a stray strand of hair away from his eyes. 

It’s a gesture that works to soften Jungkook as well, the petulant look on his face melting away as you trail your pointer finger along his cheekbone. It’s replaced with a more tender one, dark lashes blinking up at you slowly. “Open,” you command upon reaching his mouth, finger pressing down against his pink lower lip. Jungkook obeys, opening his mouth until you can see his pink tongue and the dark abyss that leads down his throat. Your finger pushes itself in, and Jungkook certainly doesn’t try to resist. His lips suction around the digit fairly quickly, tight enough to keep you there but loose enough for you to slowly draw your finger in and out, each short plunge pressing down against his tongue. 

It’s a rather short affair, one that comes to an end when he accidentally bucks up against you, pressing his hardened member against your core. You retract your finger.  “Can you,” he tries, but his cheeks are stained red and he refuses to meet your gaze. “Just…” 

You intercept him with a chaste peck, maneuvering your legs until your knees are firmly pressed into the couch cushions beneath him, his thin waist trapped in between. When you sit up, you feel drunk on power and the way Jungkook looks up at you certainly doesn’t help. “Can I sit on your face?” 

He chokes. “I— sure, please,” he blurts out. His gaze follows you as you slip off of him, quickly discarding your pants and top on the floor. One pat against his thigh has him hurrying to shimmy out of his clothes, his sweatpants caught around his ankles. 

“You’re excited,” you laugh, stripping him of his bottoms when the frustration takes him over. 

Jungkook scoffs. “Well, yeah,” he mumbles, tugging his shirt off with one smooth motion. The ink around his bicep is as dark as ever, contrasts wonderfully against his warm face. “My fiancée is gonna sit on my face.”

The title makes you preen, quickly finding your place on his lap once more. With your clothing out of the way, Jungkook really does become a furnace. Every inch of his body is hot to the touch, soft too. “Fiancée,” you giggle, hands on his chest. They slide down, fingers playfully nudging his brown nipples. Jungkook flinches at the touch. “Gonna sit on my fiancé’s face,” you parrot back, delicately pinching one nipple between your fingers. A moan spills from his lips, his cock pushing against your thigh once more.

It’s the reminder you need, pushing back dutifully against him as you continue to toy with his chest. He’d look pretty with piercings, you find yourself thinking, watching on in fascination at the way his pert nipples stand at attention. Beneath you, Jungkook begins to grow desperate, his hands finding their place on your waist to encourage you to grind down against him once more. 

Jungkook swears up and down that he’s not particularly sensitive about having his nipples touched. But when you’ve got him like this, sinfully laid out before you, you can easily confirm that his claims are nothing but lies. He loves having his nipples touched, squirms beneath you impatiently with each playful tug and twist you bestow upon them. 

You duck down, pressing a kiss against his pectoral, just beside his nipple, and Jungkook’s entire body shivers. A few careful drags of your tongue against his warm skin only serve to string him along further, the prettiest whimper pulling itself from his lips when you finally envelope one of them in your mouth. “Wait,” he gasps, clawing at your clothing as if he both wants to push you off and push you closer. You grin, brandishing one mean nip at the sensitive nub. 

Eventually, your incessant need to play with Jungkook’s chest is fulfilled. “Lay back,” you instruct, watching as he shuffles down flat on the cushions, silver hair tumbling away from his eyes. He’s so red, eyes hazy. Your panties are discarded, joining the ever growing pile of clothes on the floor. 

Once upon a time, the idea of sitting on Jungkook’s face had terrified you, filled you with nightmares of crushing his windpipe or breaking his nose. For the most part, they’re pretty unrealistic fears, ones that can be easily shut down after one careful Google search on safe sexual practices. These days, it’s all too easy; in the mornings, especially, it’s become natural for him to guide you on top carefully, holding your hand as you whimper and sob over his face. 

In the current moment, you find yourself stroking a hand down the side of his face, completely enamored with the huge puppy eyes he levels your way. Jungkook likes having your pussy in his face just as much as you do, loves making you feel good in any way he knows how. But there’s a separate matter at hand, one that stands at attention beneath his black boxers and successfully wins your attention. 

Truthfully, there is no dilemma to ponder over; you want both to ride Jungkook’s face and suck him off. The solution?

“We’ve never done this before,” Jungkook mumbles in amazement, his voice slightly muffled from his position beneath you and slightly behind you. Still, his arms dutifully wrap around your thighs, guiding you closer to his mouth where his hot breath fans against your glistening folds. You rock back willingly, hands preoccupied with pushing his boxers down and away from his engorged cock. 

“Really?” you ask, suddenly feeling overwhelmed with the cock before you and the tongue that gently laps at your folds. Jungkook makes a sound, something between a hum and whimper, his mouth slowly getting to work against your folds. “M- Maybe,” you stutter, all thought processes coming to a halt as you carefully take him in your hand. 

His cock is hard and long, his tip an angry shade that weeps with precum. From this angle, you get to watch Jungkook’s huge thighs twitch at the sensation, the tattoo that marks up one of them doing little to hide the fact. Your hand squeezes him, watches in awe as another fat droplet oozes out of his tip. A moan tears itself from his throat, and it’s so goddamn sexy it nearly drives you insane. 

It’s one particularly long lap of his tongue over your clit that sends you into action, back arching at the tingles that shoot down your spine. Wasting no more time, you guide Jungkook’s cock into your mouth, let your own tongue shower his mushroom tip in kitten licks that have him bucking upwards. He releases your clit with a lewd pop, hot breath fanning across your lips. “Fuck,” he gasps, voice harsh. 

Admittedly, it’s more difficult than you thought it would be. 

You’re not one to be easily overwhelmed (says you), but with Jungkook’s twitching cock in your mouth and his teasing tongue dipping into your entrance, it becomes hard to juggle your attention between the two. Even Jungkook, who is quite frankly the master of cunnilingus, seems torn between the two, his breathing shallow and quick against your folds. 

With each slow descent around his cock, he shudders, thigh muscles tightening in anticipation. It causes a lull in the pace of his tongue, the generous kisses and licks against your folds subject to a somewhat uneven pace that, surprisingly, leaves you more on edge than you’d ever expected it to; right when you think he’s about to suck your clit into his mouth, you’re met with a harsh exhale instead, one that makes your lips flutter. 

You’re both disappointed in yourselves for never having tried this mind-blowing position before, and equal parts understanding as to why you haven’t tried this position before— it’s a lot. His cock is halfway down your throat when it twitches, sends a gush of precum into your mouth that has your eyes rolling backwards, a whine slipping out around him. Jungkook appreciates the vibrations, letting it fuel him as he plunges his tongue into your hole. It’s a two way street, you realize, one that is constantly experiencing traffic. 

“Baby,” you gasp, pulling off of his cock with a slick sound, hypnotized by the trail of saliva that connects your lips to his tip. Jungkook’s tongue prods along your slit, makes your eyesight go blurry when the tip of his nose brushes along you as well. The idea of his cute nose buried deep someplace it shouldn’t be has you grinding down on him. “We can— we should stop,” you stutter, your trembling hand reaching forward to grasp the base of his cock. 

He’s slick with your saliva and his precum, and your hand makes a squelching sound upon contact. It must feel good, because Jungkook moans against your folds, his thighs unconsciously falling farther apart as you slowly jerk him off. You think you might’ve heard your name slip from his lips, but your mind is fuzzy, lost in your lust as Jungkook licks a sinful line from your hole to your clit, curling his tongue at the end. “J- Jungkook,” you cry, flinching away because it’s become too much, your toes curling as the beginnings of an orgasm threaten you. 

Before that can happen, he relents, leaning back with a heavy exhale, his hands loosening their grip against your ass and plopping back down against the cushions. “Fuck,” he pants, his cock twitching in your hold. A lonely droplet of precum trails down the side, your knuckles coated in the glossy substance. Beneath you, Jungkook rubs one soothing palm against your hip. 

You slink off before he can get any funny ideas, maneuver yourself around until you’re kneeling between his parted thighs, his fat cock standing at attention between the two of you. From here, he looks ravenous, and you begin to question who exactly is taking care of who. Jungkook looks like he’s a second away from pinning you down and swallowing you whole, a thought that makes your toes curl. 

It’s with a cautiously horny hand that you reach for his cock again, holding him with both hands. Jungkook growls, head lolling backwards until all you can see is his neck and his chin, thick veins protruding along his skin. Jungkook doesn’t waste a moment longer. “C’mere,” he purrs, hauling you up until you’re clumsily leaning over him, palms framing his face. A lone finger runs down your spine, its faint touch making you arch forward. “Sorry,” he says, securing an arm around your waist. “I know you wanted to take care of me, but…”

You roll your eyes, submitting yourself to his clutches as he masterfully rolls the two of you over. The couch is soft beneath your back, and Jungkook looks pretty from above too. “You just can’t sit still, can you?” you murmur playfully. 

Jungkook’s forearms find their place beneath your thighs, the fold of the back of your knee perfectly slotted against his warm skin as he shuffles closer. “Maybe another time,” he laughs along sheepishly, his hard cock gliding over your slit, teasing your clit. You gulp, eyes scanning over his lean build as if it’s the first time. “Sorry,” he repeats, but he’s got this stupidly dopey grin on his face as he glances down at your pussy; he’s insane, he’s got to be, what man makes heart eyes at a pussy?

Your man, apparently. Grasping the base of his cock, Jungkook takes care to drag it along your folds collecting your wetness along his length, a deep shudder wracking his body through it all. “I knew you would do this to me,” he mutters, so low you nearly miss it under the thundering sound of your heartbeat.

“Huh,” you mumble, and you’d like to defend yourself and say you weren’t as cock-crazy as Jungkook was coochie-crazy, but that would be a lie. You’re staring at his cock as if it holds the secrets to the universe right now.

Jungkook juts his head to the side, a motion similar to the one he does when he’s trying to crack his neck. His tongue prods along his cheek, eyes laser-focused on the point where your two bodies meet. “From the moment you walked into my house,” he grunts mindlessly, finally lining himself up with your entrance. He chances a glance up, meets your gaze with a patient look, “all good?”

“All good,” you hurriedly reply, fingers finding their place against his broad shoulders. With the way he had prepared you earlier, mouthed along your clit and your folds until you were pleasantly aroused, the glide now is too easy. Tight, but easy, has the two of you releasing twin moans that echo off the wooden walls of the cabin. 

Jungkook’s forehead is covered in a thin veil of sweat, one that glistens when the evening sunset pours in through the balcony doors, highlighting him in a golden light that makes you dizzy. The angry tip of his cock sinks into your walls, Jungkook’s ashy strands sticking to his forehead and his cheeks. For some reason, you find yourself reminiscing on the aforementioned moment Jungkook had spoken of. Of the soft sweater he’d worn that day and the dinner he had made, the blond tips on his chestnut hair and the way he’d clung onto every word you’d said. 

It makes you tear up, and, after laughing at Jungkook early for crying, you quickly turn your face away. 

Jungkook isn’t dumb. “What now,” he chuckles, though his breathing is labored, every inch of his cock that penetrates you further bringing with it another rush of adrenaline. At the hilt, you’re embarrassed to say there’s multiple tears streaming down your face, so you can’t even play it off as you usually do. “Crybaby,” Jungkook teases, but his voice is so soft and tender you don’t know what to do with yourself. 

“Just move,” you bite out, shamefully covering your face with your hands. Jungkook leans over you, the movement pushing his dick deeper inside of you, your walls clenching around him. A kiss is placed over your knuckles, just shy of your engagement ring. Your chest lurches with a silent sob. “Jungkook,” you whimper, sinking further into the cushion, “please, just—“

“I got it,” he assures you, placing one final peck against your handmade (literally) shield. And then, so quietly you almost miss it, he makes sure to whisper, “love you,” before unsheathing himself. 

You shudder, your heart feeling so full, you fear it’ll burst. You both love and hate when he treats you like this, like an ice sculpture in the scorching heat that has him doing everything he can to keep you solid. His touch is soft, the roll of his hips too slow for your liking. You feel so small and vulnerable— too pampered. “Harder,” you beg, your voice an airy whine that has Jungkook chuckling above you. 

He lives to please you, hiking your leg over his shoulder with a renewed vigor. His hands find themselves on your waist, forcefully pinning you down against the couch cushions as he sets upon fulfilling your latest request. The next series of thrusts are jerky, have you jostling in his grip as Jungkook pounds into you with an all new mindset. “Lemme see you,” he huffs, thumbs painfully digging into your skin. You tremble in his arms, heart swayed by the quiet plea in his voice. “Let me see your face, pretty girl.”

Reluctantly, you do, brandishing your tear-stricken face his way. Jungkook smiles, that stupidly handsome smile, his hips snapping into you roughly. “Fuck,” he moans, the expression never leaving his face, even when run your nails over his chest harshly. “You’re so pretty.”

You ignore him for the sake of your already weakened mental state, focusing instead on the brutal force of his hips, the way his cock stretches your walls out. Each push has you seeing stars, thighs quivering from the sensations that shoot up your spine and down your toes. “Oh,” you mewl, hands gripping his biceps as you lose yourself to him. Your eyes roll back, vision a mess of colors and nothingness all at once. 

“Is this hard enough?” Jungkook husks out, and he sounds so close. His proximity is confirmed when his mouth slots against yours, his harsh breath mingling with your own as he continues to frantically buck into your inviting heat, each new round of thrusts leaving you weaker and weaker than before. “God,” Jungkook cries, the sound nearly lost beneath your own moans and whimpers. “Gonna k- keep you forever,” he spits, tongue slipping into your mouth.

He’s messier than usual, moves with unrefined movements unlike his normal self. You don’t care, you love him all the same. His sloppy kisses turn into desperate ones, matching the pace of his hips. “Kook,” you sob, arms wrapping themselves around his neck, pulling him close until his thrusts are reduced to a shallower depth. 

“I’ve got you,” he croons, lips against your jawline. His cock presses in and you swear you feel it alongside every inch of your walls, a warmth blossoming in your stomach. He’s layering messy kisses down your face now, lips sucking dark marks any chance he gets. 

True to his word, Jungkook indeed has you. His cock pistons in and out at an astonishing pace, each surge into your folds making you dizzy over and over again. It’s a feeling you fear you’ll never grow tired of, in fact, it’s a feeling you fear you’ll begin to crave even more in the future. The good thing is, that future will extend into forever. 

You yank him towards you, swallow his low laughter with your lips. Jungkook doesn’t complain, lowering himself until he’s practically squishing you beneath his beefy body, cock ramming in and out despite all that. His tongue glides along yours, makes it his mission to muffle each of your cries. 

It doesn’t take long for you to be fulfilled. Given the fact you had sucked him off like a lollipop whilst having him eat you out, you’re not entirely surprised. That and the emotions of tonight have you melting into him sooner than you’d like, his name falling from your lips as your thighs clamp down around his waist. Jungkook takes it in stride, slows the maddening pace of his hips to cradle you in his arms. You’re like jelly, practically flop back into the cushion when he slips an arm beneath you. “You’re so good for me,” Jungkook praises, lavishing your throat in tiny pecks as his orgasm circles around. “My pretty girl.”

“Love you,” you sigh, and your body feels numb, his intrusion but a small touch now that he’s tired you out once more, your walls tender and raw. Jungkook presses a smile against your throat and, moments later, releases inside of you. 

Even minutes after the deed, the feeling refuses to return to your legs. He didn’t go that hard— well, you’re not entirely sure. The memories always become blurry toward the end of your escapades. Everything rushes back in waves, and for some reason, your first thought is, “where’s Sailor Moon?”

Your post-rump conversations have never been the most coherent, usually filled with pretty weird thoughts and ideas. Still, more grand things have happened tonight for you to be worried about a magical anime girl. Jungkook draws himself out of your core with a huff of laughter. “On the TV,” he answers, unfazed by the oddity of your question. 

That’s how you know he’s a keeper.

It takes a while, but eventually Jungkook responds. “Avocado toast,” he says, though his answer is dripping with uncertainty. He’s naked as the day he was born, snuggled up beside you in bed. He’s propped up on one arm, looking down at you over the ample swell of his manly bosom. It takes everything in you to keep your hands off his chest. 

“Correct,” you respond, “and what movie did we watch?”

Without missing a beat, “Transformers, the first one.”

You nod, glancing at the ceiling as you rack your brain for any other trivia questions to ask your fiancé. “The title of the playlist you made?”

A flush paints his cheeks. “Date Night playlist,” he answers through a pout, reprimanding you for bringing up such a memory with a flick to your forehead. You wince. “I was young and silly,” he defends.

You beam, cuddling into his side until he’s forced to lay back down. “Yeah, yeah,” you tease. “We’re only gonna get older from here,” you lament. You’d say it’s difficult to picture him with a gray head of hair, but his current silvery locks don’t leave much room for your imagination.

Jungkook pulls you close. A beat of silence passes, and then, “so who are we telling first?”

Definitely Namjoon.

Copyright © 2021, 1kook on tumblr. absolutely NO reposts allowed.

[heeracha]

fourteen. / fifteen. — the one where sunoo walks y/n home. / sixteen.

for me. — k. sunoo

✴︎ synopsis: to sunoo, you were just a random girl in one or two of his classes who happens to be friends with his friends while to you, sunoo was the guy who you’ve been swooning over for a year or so. now, with you tweeting about your crush on him on the wrong account, sunoo has just one question. you’re the one who confessed to him, so why the hell is he the one chasing (literally and figuratively) you?

✴︎ pairing: sunoo x fem!reader

✴︎ content/genre: smau, college au, fluff

✴︎ warning(s): swearing, always,, sorry sjsj

✴︎ note: i updated early today bcs i want to focus on work until i sleep,,,, that's if i have enough self control to not go back here or to tiktok later,,,,ignore the timestamps,, oki? yay <3 wasnt supposed to update and just post a jay drabble but hfbjhsfbjhd anyway enjoy <3

sunoo walks down the halls, thinking he was the only student left except for those who has night classes. he passes by a room with doors and windows open, the maintenance had probably turned the a/c off. he stops to see you sitting on the teacher's chair, typing on your laptop. kind of aggressive in his opinion, actually.

"hey," sunoo says, leaning on the doorframe and you look at him, eyebrows raising. "are you not going home yet?"

"in a bit." you answer shortly as your eyes return to the screen of your laptop, typing fastly. "you?"

"about to." sunoo answers and you hum. he doesn't know what comes over him but he comes inside the room, sitting on one of the desks of the last row as he watches you work. after an hour, sunoo looks at his watch to see that it was already nearing 8 pm. "hey, you've got to go home."

you jump lightly, eyes widening as you look at sunoo who raises an eyebrow at your reaction. "i thought you went home already." you said, lightly laughing at yourself. sunoo stands up, walking up to you.

"come on. save the file, close your laptop and let's go." sunoo says, reaching for your laptop bag and giving it to you. you look at him, frowning and he tilts his head a bit.

"ten minutes."

"no."

"since when were you voted king to tell me what to do?"

"i-" sunoo sighs, raising his eyebrow. "come on. you're going to be late in class tomorrow if you don't go home now."

"i'm never late in class."

"there's always a first time." he says with a gentle tone.

you look at him, seeing the corners of his lips twitching probably from resisting to smile at you. slowly, sunoo takes your laptop, finally letting a small smile on his face, turning your laptop to him as he saves the file and puts it on sleep. he closes it, putting it on your laptop bag and you stand up, taking your backpack that carries all your necessities.

you reach your hand out to your laptop bag but sunoo swats it, slinging it on his shoulder. "what are you doing?" you ask.

"what does it look like i'm doing? i'm walking you home." sunoo said.

"why? i can do it myself—"

"it's late already. i just don't want you to walk alone in the dark."

"are you sure? or do you just want to spend time with me?" you tease, lightly smiling and sunoo gasps, looking at you, rolling his eyes dramatically as he shakes his head.

"you don't want me to walk you home? fine by me." sunoo says and he turns around, going out of the room. he stops, leaning against the door, hiding away from you to make you think he actually left without you.

and, no, he is not doing it because you made him chase you. absolutely not. well, in your defense, you didn't know sunoo would chase you.

you chuckle, smiling widely as you shake your head, laughing at his cuteness as you take your phone from your pocket.

taglist: @tomorrowbymoa-together @icywhatim @giyyuzz @ncityy04 @goldenhypen @yougeans @hobistigma @ja4hyvn @nyfwyeonjun @big-fool-energy @amakumos @pixyseeun @angel-hyuckie @meiiiwa @junnnoooo @aria-grace-scott @msxflower @pebbypenny @isaluv @snowfalltxt @dinosdance @m1ng-how @taylorswifeyyy @tobiosbbyghorl @urresidentdrugdealer @acciomylove @leeis @yizhoutv @chirokookie @apricottulips @jay-durian @studioreader @euphorencia (let me know if you want to be tagged <3)

[winter-spiders]

HC for how Peter and Bucky and/or Steve got together??

imma do all three bc why not, right?

for WinterSpider

After Shuri helped get the trigger words out, Steve managed to get him a spot on the Avengers

After Peter Graduated HS, Tony finally got him to agree to join the Avengers, but only part-time, bc he goes to MIT online

After studying a lot, peter realizes he hadn't trained in a while and wouldn't be able to sleep anytime soon.

Bucky, bc of frequent nightmares/flashbacks, cant always sleep, so instead of sleeping. he trains in the gym instead.

After a few nights in a row of meeting in the gym at 3 am, they just decide that they would train with each other every other day, if they both were awake.

Neither of them misses a session, bc they both love training with each other because they both don't have to hold back their strength while fighting.

Say Bucky pins, Peter, down on his back, while on top of him, after weeks of training late at night, and the time outside of training they spend.

"Can I kiss you?" "Fuck Yeah Jay" Peter calls him Jay or Jamie because it feels more personal than Bucky or James

They don't go all the way, even tho they both want to. they just don't, they want to wait, till at least the third date.

They just live happily ever after (At least until Steve and/or Tony find out and beat Bucky's ass)

It works out, don't worry, The worst that happens is Tony blasting him a little harder during team training that week

for Spidershield

Steve chose to stay in the present after endgame, but retired the shield to Sam and is only on call for world-ending stuff.

Peter has had pretty frequent nightmares, from his parents to his uncle to the vulture and the building, tony dying in front of him, he's seen some shit.

so he sits outside watching the stars (bc the compound is far outside the city enough to be able to see the stars amazingly).

So he's out on the roof of the compound, just star-gazing when Steve just calmly sits down next to him.

"What up Mr. Rogers?" "Queens, I told you, it's just Steve"

They just kinda banter back and forth, Peter talking about his online courses, Steve talking about his daily paperwork from Fury.

They spend time with each other outside of Star-Gazing, but they always meet up every night at 3am to just hang out

Peter has frequent panic attacks at night, so being outside with steve just prolongs the inevitable

Steve finds Peter having one while they were training.

"Just follow my breathing, Sweetheart, It's okay, We're in the Compound, you're safe, I'll protect you baby" He brings him out of it and brings him to his room to sleep it off a bit

Peter is sticky, and won't just Steve leave him all alone.

Steve and Peter just cuddle until he's fully calmed down.

"I think i love you, Stevie" "I think i love you too, Queens"

for WinterSpiderShield

Steve and Bucky have been together for a long time, like Pre-WWII

They love each other, and Peter won't ruin a beautiful relationship, just because he went and fell in love with both of the Enhanced Men

"Hey Queens, can we talk?" "Um, Yeah? What up Steve"

"Buck, you want to start this?" "Yeah, So, Peter, we see how you look at us, and we want to know if you wanted to join us?"

"Like-like a threesome?" The two men nodded, confirming that Peter's worst nightmare is coming true because he doesn't just want sex, he wants everything.

He wants everything the men are willing to give him.

"I-um I'm sorry if I gave you guys the wrong idea, but i- um I don't want just sex from you guys" The Men look devastated as if Peter just broke their hearts.

Peter just turns on his heel and runs back to his room "Queens? Peter come back!" Peter doesn't.

It takes Peter almost two weeks of avoiding the men before they end up cornering him in the kitchen.

"Look, Peter, I get that we might've made you uncomfortable, and if we did, we are both so sorry, but after a while of thinking, I've realized that you think we only want you for sex." Steve's voice was soothing, it calmed Peters nerves almost instantly.

"It- don't you guys only want sex from me? Look I get it, a pretty little twink to spice things up, I've been propositioned for this kind of thing before, but I'm not interested in a threesome."

"Peter, doll, look, both Steve and I want you for more than just sex. We want it all. We want to date you, we want to wake up and make you breakfast in the mornings, and we want to fall asleep cuddling with you. Stevie and I are stupidly in love with you."

"You-i- You guys both love me? Like you want to be-be my boyfriends?" "Yeah, Queens, we both really love you. If you don't feel the same, that's okay, we won't take it to heart."

"I-I'll do it. Only if I can take you to the best Sandwich place in all of New York." "It can't be better than that one place in Brooklyn" "I promise, it is. Queens is home to the best Sandwich place in New York, and the owner likes me"

"Doll i think everyone likes you."

[yoimix]

haikyuu!! as types of best friends.

➼ ft. hinata, sugawara, bokuto, osamu+atsumu.

➼ playlist. talk too much - coin, higher - banks, romanticism - mrs green apple, me and my friends - james vincent mcmorrow

➼ a/n. these have light bff2l undertones hhn i love that trope, pls forgive me. </3 + there’s some timeskip spoilers for atsumu & osamu’s part.

❀ hinata :-

i wish the childhood best friends trope a very good evening.

no one’s better than hinata at making friends, even if you met after he spiked a ball into your face. you’re childhood best friends too !! so imagine being a child and having to pick up this goofball by the scruff, who has the audacity to ask you to play with him after giving you a scratched up forehead and teary eyes from a ball to the face. but, like, you were the one who said yes so it’s on you :-)

sometimes you bicker but it’s ok bc he would literally go to the ends of the earth for you if you asked. no kidding. he hates sitting still anyway so he’ll just gravitate towards where you are like you’re the sun. also gets you taiyaki in the evenings but climbs in through your window instead of using the front door like a normal person. (he has too much energy </3) if you hear someone yelling your name outside your window and ranting about volleyball games, you know who it is.

ok when he makes you mad with his bullheadedness, you'll be complaining with kageyama (who agrees vehemently) and hinata gets pissy bc you get along a little too well when you're throwing insults about him. (he's not jealous, no, of course not.) but.. how long can you stay mad at this sunshine child anyway?? you'll be pretending you never got mad at all within a few hours and go back to joking around.

he gets distracted if you're watching a match sometimes (bokuto somehow got it into his head that he needs to show off in front of you) so you got banned from watching. he overcomes it later on so you can cheer him on in his jersey too <3

gives you ALL his attention when you talk or even complain about your life. he reacts a lot to whatever you have to say so you have to pretend there aren’t people behind you glaring at hinata for having the same decibel sound level as a jet engine.

you have matching keychains you bought at a local fair !!! (you got a pochacco one for hinata but it’s super worn out by now so he keeps it in his wallet instead.) 

he has not won a single multiplayer video game against you (*cough cough* mario kart *cough*) and you don’t even have to be good at it. if you call him a loser, he’ll lose even harder. gets unnecessarily mad at just dance and you have to calm him down.

... you’ve probably kissed bc the two of you (mostly him) were too eager for a first kiss and you got fed up with his pubescent ramblings and ended up kissing him. and then had an early mid-life crisis bc you guys are definitely just friends. (unless.. unless he doesn’t think that way.. surprise surprise 😳) also he's.. kind of bad for make out practice... it’s like kissing a month old puppy.. sorry :/. if you happen to make a lot of offhand comments and tease him about his kissing skills, he WILL turn tomato red and argue in gibberish. only do that in private bc the rest of the world thinks you’re sickeningly cute together >:(

overall, your best friend is a ball of sunshine (who occasionally pisses you off) and your #1 motivation to get out of bed. it's mostly bc he's somehow there to get you out of bed though you've repeatedly told him to not climb in through your window. at least the sun is smiling upon you every day <3

❀ sugawara :-

being best friends with him is such a secure relation !! 

he’s your soft place to fall but also would provide gentle (not so gentle) reminders for your wellbeing (STUDY!!! WATER!!!! BREAKFAST!!). doesn’t get mad when you say you skipped breakfast but gives you this look of disappointment which is 100x more effective. still gets a granola bar for you though. also he literally carries bandaids for u and he’s been doing that since second grade bc you fell off the swing ONCE. you know, just in case. if you’re an accident-prone hazard to society, you’re in luck. 

BEST HUGS especially if you had a rough day and want to sob into his shoulder. if u damage his $85 hoodie tho, he will make u do his laundry and also buy snacks for him. but like he is so soft (his skin is SUPER soft bc he actually follows a skincare routine now) and cuddly like a teddy bear, it's a small price to pay for salvation.

he will hype you up for anything you do !!!! new outfit? offers to be your personal photographer. scored an A+? will treat u to your fav ice-cream. new job? will tell everyone just how proud he is. 

ALWAYS shares the last bite with you and smiles to himself when you eat it so contented. also!!! hanging out at cafes and taking cute pictures is a must <3 even though you’re not dating, you’ll have photos together that make you look a real couple which ensue teasing from daichi and asahi and admiration/jealousy from noya and tanaka. also he gets weirdly protective of you around the team (i’m looking at the moron quartet) and you have to pull the “koushi you’re not my mom” card. it really strikes a chord with him when you say that out loud.

will egg your ex's house with you if you say the word. somehow gets more pissed than you at your ex (if they're a shitty one). it's kind of scary when he's mad too so.... good luck calming him down. he's also really good at sarcastic trash talk so if you happen to meet your ex on the street... send prayers for their self-esteem.

you don't really fight often but if you happen to disagree, he'll go about it in a pretty mature way and talk it out. if you pick a fight on purpose, he'll catch on to it and either tickle you (excessively) or flick your forehead as punishment for trying to rile him up. it’s impossible to prank him!!!!! it’s like he’s got a sixth sense or something so you might as well give up on anything of the sort. 

you said you want to get a dog (or cat) with him in the near future and he somehow equated that to having children. turned bright red and started saying it’s too soon to be thinking of that while you had daichi stop you from smacking some sense into your overly imaginative best friend. (i mean, you do need to live together if you want to raise a pet sooo)

his lockscreen is a picture of the two of you so a lot of people who try to hit on him take the hint quick. he says it’s unintentional but you know he can be terribly scheming at times. if you say something like “why don’t you date me for real, coward” he will malfunction and not be able to look you in the eye. (“don’t joke around, y/n” “what if i’m not” “it kind of feels illegal to date you” “what do you mean?!💢”)

anyway you are one lucky mf if you have sugawara koushi as your best friend even if there are both ups and downs (mostly ups). having someone care for you so blatantly certainly makes the question of romance arise but you’re content with the most loving best friend ever.

❀ bokuto :-

you guys are the “two best friends in a room, we might kiss” “yes we will” “what” type of best friends PLS

it doesn’t matter what stage of life you met him, it’ll feel like you’ve been best friends since the beginning of time.

it’s just so easy to make friends with this airhead and by god’s gift, you cannot physically get annoyed at this man. sometimes his friends will complain about him being forgetful or blunt but you’re just there like. yeah. that’s bokuto. love him for it. (you seem to have a lot of patience.)

he probably gets into trouble with authority unwittingly, so save your weekends to sweet talk his way out after accidentally implying the coach has a weak mindset. afterwards, you go get ice cream or something and hang out at the dog park to forget it happened. (the amount of second hand embarrassment bokuto has given you though... you need some hard drugs to forget all of it.) 

you probably make a lot of friends through him in high school/college but at the end of the day, it’s just you and him and sometimes akaashi making sure you guys are alive. if you guys are alone together on a friday night, you’ll still be having fun!! very often, it takes shape as karaoke :-) bokuto thinks he’s really great at rapping for some reason (he’s not) so cue you screaming the lyrics in an attempt to ruin your part of the song equally. also he always sets the key wrong??? although you sing the same songs each time?? sometimes he picks a song neither of you have ever heard and the both of you try to guess the melody. he’s terrible at it but at least he’s funny. there’s not a single song he hasn’t had a voice crack in.

if you go clubbing/partying with him, get prepared to be introduced as the friend of “the guy who did four keg stands in a row before proceeding to do a cartwheel unprompted and somehow not throw up”. is on first name basis with the bartenders/hosts and gets you free drinks. also gets hit on often but is oblivious unless they’re being very straightforward. if he’s not into them... you have to pull the s/o card and save his ass. oh also he barks at anyone that gets near your drink.

will always exaggerate when introducing you to new people. “y/n and i met when i saved them from drowning a terrible death.” “it was the children’s pool and you were the one that was screaming.” “and then y/n didn’t really thank me but it’s not like heroes need thanks to do the right thing.” “kou, i will push you into a pool right now, let’s see how well you swim.” (he learned swimming to impress you so joke’s on you.)

he likes to watch you do stuff at the end of the day, so if you see him go o_o at you doing homework, you can just put your earphones on and focus on your work. even if he’s making.. a strangely.. adorable expression. also LOVES to listen to you talk about your day when he’s tired, he says it helps him sleep better (so expect a lot of nighttime calls). moreover, if you say you had a bad dream, he’ll comfort you with his ridiculously confident tone of voice (unless the dream was about something bad happening to him, then he’ll freak out and you’ll have to comfort him instead </3)

ok one thing that’s annoying about him is that he probably leaves food crumbs over your stuff like laptop, bed sheet, etc. you clean it up but bokuto.. is a bit... distracted to notice the mess he’s making. it’s usually pretty difficult to get him to be more aware, but like your glare is enough to make him at least try to be careful from the next time. (either that or he’s become sensitive to your change in mood/emotions bc you know... you’re best friends after all.)

i’m not gonna lie, he probably catches feelings for you at some point. he wants to, like, keep it lowkey bc akaashi told him to take your feelings into consideration too but?? it’s so hard?? you’re literally so pretty?? everything you say is like music to him??? he reacts reflexively to all the firecracker feelings u give him. he probably says he likes you all the time but you dismiss it with “as a friend right :-)”. there’s no climbing up from that one, sorry bokuto.

to summarize, if a moody golden retriever was your human best friend.exe

❀ miya twins :-

they feel like a set. it would be strange to have one of the twins as a bff and not have the other one around whoops 🤷‍♀️ 

either you and osamu bully atsumu in your free time, or you and atsumu annoy osamu for fun (or both) <3. it’s always a good idea to team up with osamu and prank atsumu for fun btw. (put wasabi in his breakfast pancakes and you’ll get a very pissed off but weirdly cute tsumtsum. you can blame it on osamu if you don’t want to face his wrath.) your alternative is to embarrass osamu in front of strangers with atsumu, have fun with that. (second hand embarrassment also works.)

when you were younger, you pretended to not be able to distinguish the twins bc it would visibly rile atsumu up and then you’d go “ok you’re atsumu”... which would further rile him up. osamu got used to your shenanigans though it ticked him off the first time too LOL. call them the wrong name on purpose and they’ll start a riot; be careful when you’re playing with fire pls.

you guys played a lot of knight and prince/princess/royal when you were a kid and atsumu would always try to make osamu the evil dragon holding you captive. in the end, you were somehow the knight, osamu the prince to be rescued and atsumu the big, bad dragon. (it’s kind of funny in hindsight. your parents have photographs of the three of you fighting like no tomorrow.) also speaking of which, your parents are also friends and have bets on which twin you’ll marry (or if you will at all). it’s tearing your parents’ friendship apart.

these two have DEFINITELY fought over whose jersey number you’re going to wear to the games ( “oi, ‘samu, stop brainwashing my best friend into wearing your stupid double digit number” “you know i’m the best friend, ‘tsumu. they clearly like me better over yer ratty ass.” “what did ya say?!?!? if anything, you’re the one that looks like ratatouille.”) you wore kita's jersey number to games.

imagine sunday picnics with the boys !!! by that, i specifically mean osamu and his perfect bento boxes <3 sometimes the two of you will cook together before your outings while a sulking atsumu stands outside bc you didn’t let him. (let him in, you monsters.) he says he can cook too but the last time the twins’ bickering almost burnt the whole kitchen down. the picnics continue well into adulthood and you get to diss your boss to the twins who will always support your rants. (sometimes atsumu will tell you it’s your fault but you can smack him off. we only need supportive besties here 🙄)

if someone hurts u.... they’re going to need divine intervention to be safe... you have two well-built, physically adept best friends ready to beat the shit out of anyone who deliberately breaks ur heart. 

when the twins get into a physical fight...... oh boy. it kinda pisses you off that they’re spewing profanity at each other and you’re the one getting glares. but at the same time, you don’t really want to step into a fight that has nothing to do with you. people should solve their interpersonal issues on their own. they have never fought over you, this isn’t twilight <3 

but the question did come up once on which twin you like better; it’s not something to seriously fight over though. if you chose osamu, atsumu will complain for six days straight and you’ll start to regret ever answering the question. if you say atsumu, osamu won’t feed you his onigiri anymore for a few days which is just as bad. the safest choice is to say neither bc it will both be funny and you won’t suffer too many consequences. if you say you love the both of them for being your best friends all this time and go all mushy, there’s a slight chance they’ll go soft too. god help you from the bone crushing hug you’re about to receive 🙏

you make sure to not miss any of atsumu’s official games !! sometimes he’ll wave at you and make the reporters give you hell bc he’s a little shit. just push osamu to them and run away if it gets that bad. (he gets free advertising for his shop, he should be grateful.)

osamu is super good at cheering you up!!! whether it’s with food or with pleasant talk, you’ll be feeling much better with a full stomach and a calmer state of mind. as for atsumu, he’s really good at you cheering you up by distracting you. he’ll talk about his team or this new serve he learnt and the world will seem a lot brighter bc he seems so happy about it. whichever twin you go to, it’s win-win. 

in return, the twins take up a good chunk of your time. sometimes atsumu will crash at your place after a game though you’ve told him to not lead the damn reporters here. osamu makes you taste test his experimental onigiri... which are not always good..... no seriously, why’d he put honey and tuna in there ?? but still, your life is ridiculously colorful with them around.

anyway, what can i say except what’s better than one best friend?? two best friends !!!